#im glad yall liked the prologue so much!!

[unstoppableforcce]

dark side

—CHAPTER ONE: trust

pairing: Javier Peña x reader

prologue | next part | masterlist

a/n: I’m kinda in love with where I have this heading, I knocked this part out in like two hours and surprised myself so I hope y’all enjoy!! thanks for the incredible feedback!!

It was just a handshake, right? It was nothing he hadn’t done a thousand times before but...

But all he could think about was how your hands felt cradled in a desperate grip around his neck as he thrusted up into you no less than seven hours before. And as he took your hand as professionally as he could, all he could feel were the callouses that lined your skin which he had been so quick to ignore last night.

The palm of your hand was curved to the hilt of a pistol, not unlike his. The tips hardened against the back of his hand, just as he was sure his were rough against the back of his own. And it was just a handshake but his mind was nowhere near where it needed to be for something as simple as a handshake.

He could see it in your eyes too, but both of you kept your mouths shut as a Stechner lingered alongside you, and when you released his hand, Stechner laid a protective arm over your shoulders.

The same shoulders he buried his face into as he lost himself in your body—

“She’s one of my new transfers, in just after Escobar was killed.” Stechner continued to introduce, as if there was nothing between the two of you. He gave your name as if Javi hadn’t read it off your badge just hours ago, standing nearly naked in your kitchen.

Stechner was building off a clean slate and the two of you just kept your mouths shut as to why he couldn’t be more wrong.

No, he wasn’t going to do that. Instead, he played along. “Right, welcome to Colombia.”

“Thanks.” The English sounded wrong on your tongue when he had only heard you speak Spanish in the bar. It had sounded like such a natural accent, he didn’t even second guess it...

Spy. You were a spy, or at the very least, a CIA agent. He had to keep reminding himself otherwise he swore he was verging on losing himself in you the same way he did last night.

Thankfully, Stechner had other ideas.

“Do you know what this meeting is about?” He asked, gesturing to the closed door to the Ambassador’s office over his shoulder but Peña shook his head.

“My office just told me it was urgent.” As soon as the words left his mouth, he saw something shift in Stechner’s disposition. It was smugness rising back to his features, a look only a man such as himself could muster so casually. “Do you?”

He let out a hearty chuckle which did little to comfort Javi where he stood across from him, “yeah.”

Before he could ask what the hell that meant, the secretary off to the side stood and grabbed the door to gesture them in, and he was left to follow behind you and your perfect figure hidden beneath a professional pantsuit, mind filled with things that were far from professional yet again.

“Take a seat, Agents,” the Ambassador began with and Javi followed right behind you, taking a seat in the chair beside you as Stechner stood over your shoulder still. “Thank you for coming in so early.”

Javi passed on a half-hearted nod, glancing to the side to find you offering something similar, but his gut told him something was wrong.

Stechner was naturally smug, sure, but this was different.

The position of DEA attaché was certainly new to him still, but meeting with the CIA station chief, the agent he happened to have slept with the night before, and the ambassador? Something was going on. He had trusted his gut for this long, he let it save his life out on the streets, he couldn’t ignore it now.

But he also wasn’t sure there was anything else he could do to stop what he was sure was coming.

All he could do was sit up straight and wait for it to hit him square in the face. And when Stechner opened his mouth again, he was sure it was coming quick.

“The Ambassador and I have been talking about ways to improve interagency cooperation...” he began, stalking around the chair you sat in to rest himself against the front side of the lavish desk the Ambassador was sat behind. “And we have a pretty simple solution to ensure things go differently this time around down here.”

Javi glanced to you then back to the two men in front of him, still waiting for the final blow.

“We’re going to place a CIA agent on your team, Peña.” The ambassador quickly filled in the silence Stechner left in his hesitation.

“This one,” Stechner laughed slightly, gesturing to you and practically forcing his stare back your way.

“Excuse me?” The two of you said in unison, your voice layered in equal levels of shock to his.

“We feel it will smooth things out around here. The DEA and the CIA are going to have to work together this time around, Cali needs to be done differently.”

Differently? Javi understood different better than anyone in this room did, but this was different, this was putting a security camera on his team and calling it cooperation. If it was cooperation, it wouldn’t be forced onto him. If it was cooperation, you wouldn’t be a spy...

You wouldn’t be you...

He had to swallow a breath, keep himself from shouting out the first exclamation to come to mind and form a real response, “I don’t need CIA assistance.”

“You sure about that?” Stechner pulled the newspaper from his folder.

Two of his agents in Cali, being called out so plainly on the front page of the paper. There was no way there wouldn’t be consequences for that... Stechner really meant it when he saw his operation last night was going to amount to nothing.

This was all his doing.

The look on the ambassador’s face was all he needed to know he had no chance to argue his way out of it, yet Stechner still felt the need to voice his side of the story, “she is uniquely trained in surveillance and intelligence gathering, I’m sure you’ll find her a valuable asset to your team.”

He opened his mouth to shoot back a quick response, but you were faster.

“I have active assignments—“ clearly this was as much of a shock and disappointment to you. He didn’t know why he took solace in that, he just knew that he did.

“We’ll work all that out.”

“I’m not a liaison—“

“We’re not saying you are... we just would like to use your talents in a different area.” There wasn’t a single word out of Stechner’s mouth that didn’t sound slimy...

“I—“ Javi tried this time, but it was the Ambassador who cut him off.

“This is already decided. And it’ll be for the best.”

For the best? Javi could think of about a thousands ways that this benefited the CIA and their absurd agenda over actual crime fighting... this ‘deal’ of Stechner’s was going to let The Godfather’s of Cali walk away free, with all the money in the world. This wasn’t the best, this wasn’t even justice. This was sticking a spy on his team and using you to further their agenda.

Why was he still surprised by this kind of thing? He’d been in the game long enough, and he still hated when the true colors of the system burned through.

He was no saint, far from it, but he knew better than to let shit like this slide.

He also knew the last place to have a fit of anger was in the office of the Ambassador.

“Right.” He nodded, getting to his feet and giving a final nod to the room before leaving. Unfortunately, you and Stechner were right on his heels.

“Peña.” You called you get him to stop halfway down the hall and clench his eyes shut before turning back towards you. It was the first time you had even said his name...

He wanted to shout, at you, in general... but in the middle of the embassy? In front of Stechner? He bit his tongue and turned back to face you. “Yeah?”

He saw Stechner whisper something to you before peeling off and suddenly it was just the two of you left in the hall, and that was an audience he could work with.

“Did you know?”

Your face fell to your feet with some emotion coursing through you. He initially figured it was shame, or guilt, like you knew the whole time what this was coming to, but as your stare lifted back up, he saw it was anger. The same anger he felt coursing through his veins.

“You’re going to have to be a little more specific...”

“Did you know when I fucked you last night that you were going to be spying on me today?” He switched to Spanish as the words flowed from his lips and he didn’t even know why, he just couldn’t help himself. Speaking to you in English still felt weird and yet, by now, he had spoken to you more in this building than he had in the whole of last night.

“No.”

“Did you know who I was?” Was this what being used felt like? What the hell was this anger bubbling within him?

“You think I’m an idiot?” That was a yes. And it felt terrible. “What? Just because you left when you found out who I was—“

He wasn’t going to have this fight with you in the hall of the embassy, he had to draw the line somewhere. He didn’t even let you finish, he just turned his back and kept walking back to his office. Leaving you stood in the hall with your hands propped on your hips and a familiar sentiment falling from your lips, “fuck.”

The worst part was how impressive you were.

Stechner had been kind enough to leave your personnel file in his office by the time he stormed back to his desk, and while he watched a desk in his bullpen be cleared out for you, he read all he could through the bars of redaction. And you were impressive.

If you weren’t CIA, he might’ve actually wanted you on his team. (If you weren’t CIA, maybe he’d admit he had some of the best sex of his life last night)

He really hadn’t ever been played like this. At least when he was being played by dirty cops or the higher ups, he knew it was coming, this was new since he had gotten back, being played so out in the open.

He had to send two good agents back, the Colombians pulled their visas. And he got you in their place. All for this goddamn surrender—

“Can I come in?”

Slamming your file shut, he glanced up to find you leaned so gently against his doorframe. But he couldn’t give you a verbal answer just yet, all he could manage was a brief nod.

“I’m as displeased with this assignment as you are, trust me.” You said so casually as you entered and settled into the seat across from him, but the majority of your sentence went over his head.

Trust you? Yeah right—

“I’m supposed to be doing real work here, and instead I’m assigned you? I get to play babysitter so Stechner can get what he wants?” At least you were honest. “No offense but you’re not what I want to be doing here.”

His mind was nowhere near professional territory as the words flowed to his ears.

“Last night—“

“I wasn’t there for you, I didn’t know about any of this, and I’m sorry.” Was it that easy? Was he just supposed to believe that.

Scanning your face up and down once, he was afraid that he actually did.

“So, What do we do?” He sighed, itching at his brow and aching for a cigarette.

“Let me make it right?

You were definitely new to Colombia. That just wasn’t something that happened here. For an agent with a record as substantial as what he read, he just didn’t understand your offer and his face clearly cemented itself in that confusion.

“I can only tell Stechner what I hear, so don’t let me hear anything you don’t want me to.” You followed up quickly, “you want me to leave a room, just tell me...”

“You would do that, you’d disobey your boss and order from the ambassador for me?”

You scoffed at that, quickly putting him back in his place. “It’s got nothing to do with you.”

He leaned forward on his elbows, “so why?”

“Like I said, you aren’t why I was transferred here.” It seemed so simple coming from your lips, he imagined you could explain rocket science like that and he’d understand just by following the plush of your lips. The lips that he couldn’t breathe without last night... “I have real assignments and maybe once Stechner realizes this isn’t working, I can get back to it.”

“Real assignments?” You gave a plain nod. “If not Cali, then what?”

Another scoff tore through you, “there’s more to Colombia than drugs and communists.”

And he believed you. But he couldn’t escape the feeling that that was the beginning and end of everything.

Most of your file was classified, redacted beyond readable and he believed you.

As he shook your hand one last time and watched you leave his office for the new desk they had cleared out for you, he couldn’t help but mutter a final, “fuck.”

There was no way this was that simple. There was no way you were that simple.

—

->tags: (let me know if I missed you or you want to be tagged!)

@the-feckless-wonder @arrowswithwifi @ms-dont-care @leo-moon

[thaliasthunder]

grecia reading the secret history by donna tartt 🖼

here u have me FINALLY being able to read this book after weeks of searching for it

prologue + chap 1-2:

they fucking killed someone 💀

MA'AM TARTT THIS PROSE??????????

oh our main boi is named richard papen okay okay nice to meet u young man

so, the greek class huh?

damn the dark academia vibez here are IMMACULATED 🗝🖼🎩

I am nothing in my soul if not obsessive. -> PEOPLE DIED

did this mf really say come to bed w me,,,,, IN LATIN ?????

henry is such a emotionless narcisistic dick................i love him

professor julian marrow i love u

henry explaining how they'd take down hampden in extreme detail........ okay that's suspicious..... that's weird 👁

Francis maybe? He and she were fairly chummy, but Francis didn't look like the sort who would be too interested in girls. -> did i just read this rig- INSERTE MEME DE "LO SUPONIA 🏳️‍🌈"

.................woah

TOO MUCH TO THINK ABOUT

And the boy twin, he starts screaming at me. Like he really wants to kill me, you know? And that Henry just standing there, but to me he was scarier than the other one. -> why am i??? fascinated by this...........????

"See? Knew he'd come. Oh, hello. Boy am I glad to see" "Where's the check," said Henry, in a toneless and deadly voice. -> LMFAO

Once he was inside, Henry turned to me. 'I'm very sorry,' he said -> MY BABY BOY DONT APOLOGYZE ITS NOT UR FAULT

oh francis' has a house in the country and they all spent time in it this such a pleasant image 😭

HENRY DIDNT BELIEVE WE'VE GONE TO THE MOON IM FUCJING CRYINXG

Live forever.

(...) but for sedentary people they had an odd excess of bruises and small wounds -> okay thats suspicious.... thats weird

He smiled at her. There was a slight chip in one of his front teeth I'd never noticed before; it gave his smile a very engaging quality. 'You're light as a feather,' he said. -> SHUT UPPP 😭😭😭

bitch what the fuck is "Good girl. Look at you, you didn't even cry" and "she was brave" ???? U better stop before i fall in love w yall

i have no self control so i already made a playlist and may i tell u Sober II Melodrama by lorde and Heathens by 21pilots are the most tsh song i've heard u'r welcome

[stormblessed95]

2015 BTS LIVE HYYH ON STAGE DVD Pt. 2

This package was released on 160223 and covers the concerts performances filmed from 151127 to 160323. This DVD package covers just the Seoul concerts I believe, which were the first 3, 151127 - 151129. There are 3 DVDs included in this package. The first 2 DVDs cover the actual concert in full from 151129, the last day in Seoul. The other 5 performances were in Japan. The 2nd DVD also includes a talk about ‘花樣年華’ (HYYH) and the full VCR Interview. You can find my post over that here. Disc 3 includes Prologue and VCR making film, the Rehersals and practice making films and the concert making film. (346 minutes in total from all 3 DVDs.) And Disc 3 is what I'll cover in this post. Reminder again that this is simply me bullet point talking about this as I go basically, like I'm reacting to a friend. Lol

Disc 3:

BTS 2015 HYYH On Stage Prologue & VCR Making Film:

(Resolution sucks, but i did find this on YouTube for anyone who hasn't seen it!)

They shot all this in August of 2015 to be ready for the their concert in November. All dressed for winter and dying in the summer heat. Lol

Hobi and Jimin teasing each other and being like, this is how we hang out for real 🤣 Hobi saying he feels awkward when giving compliments to the members, I'm glad he has gotten more comfortable with that over the years! Lol everyone teasing Tae for being bad at arguing logically 😅 Jimin showing off his kendo moves for their fight scenes and everyone giggling. Hobi getting excited about talking informally to Yoongi since it's all acting. 🤣

"While they are shooting with their best, I'm taking a break with my best" i love Jin so much. 2seok cheering Tae on for his solo shoot 🥺 Jin bringing all his dongsaengs cold snacks and drinks because he is the sweetest angel. "I didn't realize we hang out so well when I was in the crowd, now I see how it is from here." I might just quote Jin this whole video! He said BTS authentic and have fun together for real 🥺 and the cutest (albeit directed, but they didn't let go) TaeJin hug when Jin joined the group.

Jimin literally vaulting over taekook to dance with Hobi for their "dancing in the sun" scene, he is the coolest. And This is the oddest scene yet lmfao. Maknaes all bent over onto Joon and the hyungs jumping on top of them. Where were vminkooks heads? In between each other's legs, clearly. 🤣🤣 "hyungs are about to die now" maknaes took their turns jumping on their hyungs too 🤣 IM DYING laughing. LOL the game is called malttukbakgi if you want to look it up, but yeah, clearly zero boundaries 😂

JK saying it's better (temp wise) now that it's night, turns and asks Jimin if the north or south pole is colder. Jimin just says "I don't know, I've never been to either." Lol fair Jimin, fair.

TaeJinKook playing some sort of slapping game. Lmao why is this shooting film so violent so far?? 🤣🤣 Tae trying to cuddle Hope, and Hobi just going "I'm going to make you uncomfortable" and trying to shove him off before giving in. Aggressive affection is how this video is going apparently 🤣 JK handstands on the playground equipment too.

3J teasing outside the rest stop as they talk about filming that day. Jimin hanging off Jhope for cuddles, he really is his baby. He is so cuddly for real. Vminkook in the bed of the truck for filming and Jimin just curls around Jungkook for cuddles 🥺 probably because it was ungodly hour in the middle of the night. I hope he got a nap in! Lol

What was up with the indecision about putting your arm around Jimin during the shooting where yall all stare off at the ocean? Lol the awkwardness of JKs arm going up and almost around Jimin just to totally change course and scratch at his own head instead. 🙈😅

JK being jealous of their stunt man and wishing to do the jumps instead 😅 of course, vs YoonJin watching it happen and going "it's scary." Lol Hobi modeling the truck, I'm sold. Jimin watching YoonKooks staring into the distance scene over the directors shoulder. 94z are so cute, Hobi pretending to fish, and Joon pretending to BE the fish. Lol

Sope taking over the camera to be silly with it filming each other. Everyone just having fun on the beach but covered in mud and sand. Lol they really just be having a good time together. I love that JinMinHope are doing like 80% of our transitions between sets for this video lol.

(Yes, I accidentally posted this instead of saving it to my drafts! Lmfao, so I'll do the last 2 making films in a part 3 I guess! 😭 thanks for your patience! I'm sorry!)

Hope praising Jin for being the best actor and saying Jimin is probably the worst. Lol Jimin said he that his acting isn't bad as long as he doesn't say anything 😅😂 and Jin getting all shy when gold about the compliment. 🥺 Jin also agreeing that the worst actor is Jimin. Aww Jimin saying "our V did great acting" and then praising Jin too 🥺 they are so cute.

Shooting last the bridge videos for concerts. Joonie shoots in an old library and seemed to enjoy it too. He said he wants to go on his day off too. Jin pretends to be a photographer for his video. He is so effortlessly talented and beautiful. Hobi filming while listening to music and saying how he loves the atmosphere, other than his bug attack. Lol Tae shooting as a fashion designer and how he said it was similar to him as a character too since he loves fashion. Yoongi playing basketball for his shooting and saying it feels good to do so. He seemed to have a good time for real too! JK is filming a scene about falling in love at first sight with a girl while he is eating. Lol Jimin's scene was karaoke and he said that he planned to stay and sing seriously after they left lol

[bleufrost]

hi. I know I havent been active on here in a year? maybe two? but...im writing a loki fanfic based on the series. I think ill try to have chapters out by the following week (one-two depending on how heavy each episode is)

anyway, I have the prologue done and the first chapter is almost finished. Ill be working on the second this weekend and yall can hopefully tell me if you like the shorter chapters 1000-2000 words, or longer ones more.

I'll tag people on my loki/tom list, but please feel free to ask me to take you off considering I havent written in a while. I completely understand 🖤

thank yall so much for your patience, and im glad to be writing again!

[gaylortruther]

(many) tag games

saw someone else do this so i figured i’d go through all my tag games in one looong post instead of spamming you all with a bunch of separate posts!

i’m gonna tag everyone now and yall can choose which tag games you want to do or whether you want to do them all (or whether you want to do any)!!

thanks to everyone who tagged me in all of these! i LOVE being tagged in tag games and i am always up for more! <3

tagging THE SANCTION (including ppl that i haven’t gotten up on the page yet im sorry abfjffsdhsjbjsdf it will happen SOON):  @newdivinities @wolvesofarcadia @maskedlady @victoiirres @sancta-silje @bumblebeesonpaper @wasting-ink-not-youth @horrorspell @ya-lady-tauriel @awritinglen @purpleshadows1989 @ivonoris @theforgottencoolkid @the-ichor-of-ruination @grotesqu-e @lucacangettathisass @tea-ndi @hazeywrites @lunar895 @thewordsinthesky-andstars

[LAST LINE TAG]

TAGGED BY  @melwrotethat AND @hazeywrites

thank you both for the tags! these are the last few lines of the prologue-excerpt-thing i wrote for the page i’m working on for WHERE THE CELLAR MEETS THE SKY

Somehow, Collin hears them. Silently, she rolls up her sleeve, and Rowan feels the Collin Sutherland they knew is somewhere far, far away. The tattoos are black, geometric in design, two on each arm, and eerily similar to the ones Rowan has just discovered on their own left arm. They're sure if they were to roll up their right sleeve, they would find more.

"I should have told you a long time ago," Collin whispers. "I didn't know you were a part of it, but I should have guessed. I didn't want to put you in danger."

"I'm not- I don't- in danger of what?"

The waves crash onto the shore, and in the distance, a seagull cries, sending Collin into action. She grabs Rowan's hand and starts pulling, dragging them back behind the house.

"Come on. We don't have a lot of time, we have to get going. I can tell you everything on the way. I don't know why he brought me here instead of straight to the veil, damn it-,"

"Wait!," they say, wrenching their hand out of her grasp. "Just- stop! Where are we going?!"

Collin's eyes flash bright, despite the lack of sunlight. "Home."

yeah, a bit long, a bit unedited, but *shrugs*

[SPELL OUT UR URL USING SONG TITLES]

TAGGED BY @tea-ndi

thank you sage!!! <3

hard feelings/loveless | lorde

another one of those days | cavetown

let’s fall in love for the night | FINNEAS

ocean eyes | billie eilish

honey and milk | flower face

i know | king princess ft fiona apple

dreamz | sara king

iloveyou | BETWEEN FRIENDS

nobody’s home | gnash

greek god | conan gray

sycamore girl | rex orange county 

and there you have a small sample of my music taste! add in literally every taylor swift song (dont judge me), some lo-fi tunes without ANY words whatsoever, and the occasional fall out boy or panic at the disco goddamn absolute banger, and you have my XANDERS JAMS playlist on spotify. ENJOY

[11/11/11 TAG]

TAGGED BY @awritinglen <333333333333333333333333

thank you for tagging me len!!! your questions were so fun!! i’m doing this for WHERE THE CELLAR MEETS THE SKY

Name all OCs in your WIP

OMFG okay,,, wait do you mean full names?? POV characters as of rn are Collin Aisling Sutherland, Rowan Tilley (doesn’t have a middle name) and Avery Bristol Charter. then the next most important one is Isaac Michael Rosewell, even though he’s the antagonist. then the side characters that are still very featured are Noah Rosalyn Pratten, Reese Iseul Radley, and Sage Emarosa Delgado. THEN we get into the very very side characters, Willa Robinson and her son August Robinson. then we have Avery’s parents, Alaric and the late Octavia Charter. and thennnnn we have Beldane Moreno, Avery’s uncle and Collin’s grandfather (undecided abt that last name but going w it for now). i promise it all makes sense. i promise anfnfsjnfdjsfd

Name at least one hobby your Main character love

i’ll give this one to Collin, she is a musician! Avery’s mother always taught her music before The Accident (dun dun dunnn) and after Collin was abandoned in the Nigh she threw herself into music. she plays guitar mostly, but she secretly loves piano the best out of every instrument she knows

3 sentences about your current WIP

OOF. im so bad at summaries why would you do this to meee abfhshjbsbshfjsbf. “A determined believer wants to return to a home that never wanted her. Almost 4000 miles away, an incisive, intellectual outcast of a dreamer muses over getting out of their hometown. And infinities away from them both, a teenage revolutionary disappears into thin air, on his way to bring back his past and fix his (and everyone’s) future.”

Is there a romance in your WIP and did you plan it from the beginning?

yes! there are three! they are definitely a main focus of the plot, but not THE main focus. Reese and Rowan were definitely planned from the beginning. Collin and Noah were, too, but they weren’t originally enemies to lovers, and they are now (hehehehehe). and Isaac and Avery were DEFINITELY not planned from the beginning. in fact, Avery was originally paired up with Sage, but it’s literally so much better this way and i’m so glad it’s been changed. Isaac and Avery has been planned since about when Isaac’s character was thought up, one year into planning WTCMTS.

What genre(s) is it?

a mix of dystopia and urban fantasy. and it’s YA, borderline NA because some of the characters are 19-20, but i still think YA is appropriate because of the style of writing.

What’s the aesthetic of two of your characters?

fun question! Collin’s aesthetic is very emo-punk, with a splash of yellow towards the end of the series. piercings, blue hair, rips on clothing, dirty converse, smudged eyeliner, safety pins. the yellow comes in as part of her character arc, as she learns to accept that her childhood memories are tainted and not actually perfect utopia. Rowan is way more minimalist (sometimes). they’re into the bookstagram type aesthetic, and mom jeans with sneakers, jean jackets, plants against a white wall, colorblocked windbreakers, rain against a car window.

When did you start your current WIP?

WTCMTS was started in august of 2017 

How far along are you in the process (i.e 1st/2nd/3rd draft, worldbuilding)

still worldbuilding, unfortunately, for personal reasons

Who’s the hardest character for you to write?

OOOOOOF. sage or rowan?

What music genre best decribes your main character(s) and whats their favorite?

Collin - alternative (favorite band would be like twenty one pilots, p!atd) 

Rowan - ichillwave (clario, rex orange county)

Avery - emo (fall out boy, all time low)

Isaac - indie alternative OR instrumental lofi (jaymes young, birdy)

Noah - electropop (lorde, halsey, charlie xcx)

Reese - folk rock (the head and the heart, of monsters and men)

Sage - indie pop (lana del ray, florence + the machine)

Are you working on more than one WIP?

yes! i have four currently but only two are important lol, ILLUNIUS and WHERE THE CELLAR MEETS THE SKY (this one). WIP PAGE

MY QUESTIONS

how did you come up with the title for your WIP?

is there anything you want to change about your WIP but you are hesitating on?

do you have a favorite character? a character that is your baby?

write a tinder bio for one of your characters.

how do you feel about epilogues? does your wip include an epilogue?

what changes does your MC go through over the course of the story?

what is the most significant insignificant thing that happens in your story? don’t explain why it is significant if it spoils things ;)

do you know what will happen after the ending of your wip, or would you rather not picture it?

how long does your wip span? is it a novel? a series? does it have prequels or spin-off wips?

what is a major internal conflict for your MC? 

do you include flashbacks in your wip? do you like writing flashbacks?

[HOW TO KNOW YOU’RE IN A ______ NOVEL TAG]

TAGGED BY @writevevo​ AND @wolvesofarcadia​

thank you both for this tag! it’s so much fun and both of your novels sound like novels that would be very interesting to be stuck in :D

inspired by this post

HOW TO KNOW YOU’RE IN A HALOHIDINGS NOVEL

you’re an older sibling and you have a younger sibling. you’re extremely bitter towards your younger sibling for stealing opportunities from you, damning you to a life you never truly wanted. your younger sibling adores you and just wants to please you. they never meant to do it. 

you’re stuck in constant, wistful wanderlust, never feeling like you truly belong, never fitting in anywhere, not with friends, not with family, and when you finally find the place you’ve been looking for, you realize it’s nothing like you dreamed or remembered.

you’re not heterosexual. no one around you is. no one is cisgender either. where are they? no one knows. 

you have a peculiar capability dancing under your skin. it trickles from your pores and muddles with your mind. maybe you asked for it, maybe it was predestined, maybe you never wanted anything to do with it. whatever the reason, it’s there, and you don’t know what’s you and what’s it. maybe you’re not meant to ask. maybe you’re meant to succumb. 

your memories are as fickle as the rain, coming and going and breaking through the clouds, shattering the fog and disappearing with the sun. you can’t recall what you’re doing here, or where you’re meant to be instead. what’s your name?, they ask. you don’t know.

there are two worlds. one world is blissfully unaware of this, or at least, as unaware as any world of millions and millions of people can be. no secret can be kept forever, they tell you. you are desperately trying to keep the secret.

the one closest to you, despite your abhorrent denial of this fact, the one you would trust with your life, will betray you. because of their decision, their selfishness, you will either lose them, or lose yourself.

THOSE WERE SO FUN OMG. they all mostly apply to both of my major wips, which is probably bad. oh well LMAO

SORRY THAT WAS SOOOOOOOO LONG hope at least someone does one of these tag games lol <3 

xander out

[intothedanvers-e]

Reconnected

Word Count: 2k

Pairing: Tom Holland x latina reader

Summary: The way you two ended hurt like hell, but you couldn’t stop each other from living out your dreams. You knew it was dumb but you never wanted to erase his number from your contacts, hoping that one day he’d call you and want to meet with you again.

Author’s Note: I made myself emo writing this at essentially 2 am but I couldn’t get this idea out of my head. Thank you to everyone who read the prologue to this series!! I didn’t expect anyone to like it and im so glad yall did!! If youd like to be part of this taglist please let me know! If you have any feedback also please don’t hesitate in sending it to me!! I hope you guys like it!! SIDE NOTE: italics means its a text message from Tom, italics + bold is a text from y/n

Here’s my masterlist!

Prologue Chapter 2 Chapter 3

Chapter 1

You were standing at the end of a red carpet that seemed to go on forever. You swore that if Jane wasn’t standing next to you, you would’ve collapsed already. You were extremely nervous; you were an author not a famous person who was used to doing stuff like this! Before you knew it someone was passing forward a sign with your name on it and was directing you in front of the hoards of cameras. It all seemed to go by in a flash (no pun intended) because by the time you knew it you and Jane were at the other end and being escorted into the beautifully decorated ballroom.

You became overwhelmed immediately. The ballroom looked like a scene straight out of a movie; there was beautiful decorations on every table and the lighting had all been done to make the room look like it was magical. You could tell some of the decorations were inspired by the books that were nominated for awards. You walked over to a table that had your name on one of the plates and almost lost it when the centerpiece was a replica of an important stone in your book. If it weren’t for the fact that you were in a room full of your heroes, you would be in tears by now.

“I need a drink. Real bad,” you said turning to Jane who you knew was just as overwhelmed as you but did a much better job of hiding it.

“It’s in open bar. Get your drank on girl,” she said pointing to a beautiful bar that looked like it was covered in snow.

You simply nodded at her and walked to the bar, trying to keep your hands from shaking.

“Can I have a lime margarita please?”

“Coming right up.”

You smiled and looked around the room, trying not to freak out at all the amazing people that were trickling in. This was something beyond your wildest dreams. Never in your life did you ever think you’d become a published author, let alone be in a room with the worlds most spectacular writers of your generation.

“Let me guess, a lime margarita?”

The voice sounded familiar. It was almost soothing. You turned around and came face to face with none other than your ex, Tom Holland. You quickly looked around the room, just to make sure you weren’t hallucinating.

“I’d been looking for the most beautiful author in here and I finally found her,” he said taking a step closer to you and leaning against the bar.

He still made your heart flutter.

“What are you doing here?”

“Well you know, Spider-Man spends quite a lot of time reading to kids, so I got the honorary invite. Also…I wouldn’t miss you winning this award for the world.”

Hearing him say that send a mixture of nerves and warmth up your spine. You knew he meant it, there was no doubt in his mind that anyone other than you would win that award. You, on the other hand, had spent days convincing yourself there was no way in hell you were winning that award but that it was still an honor to be nominated.

“I’m glad you’re here, but I’m not winning that award. Have you seen the other nominees? People with years and years of experience. There’s no way I’m getting that.”

You looked down at your feet, suddenly realizing how badly you actually wanted it.

“Years and years of experience yet you managed to get the nomination just off of the two books you’ve written. That’s a feat in itself if you ask me.”

You turned to smile at him. You so badly wanted to hold him and kiss him. You wanted to go sit down and tell him how there hasn’t been one day where you haven’t thought of him. How you were insanely proud of all that he is now and just catch him up on everything that’s been happening in your life. You wanted it to be just like before, except with a few more years of experience gained.

You were about to say something when a woman came and wrapped her arms around him and gave him a quick kiss on the lips. Tom froze and tried to shift his body away from you but couldn’t because of the way she was holding him.

“I’d been looking for you baby,” she said connecting her lips to his neck. She turned to you and smiled.

“I don’t believe we’ve met.”

You grabbed your drink and walked away without saying anything. You knew this would happen, you just didn’t think you’d feel this heartbroken. You sat back down in your seat without saying another word to anyone.

The awards ceremony had begun but you were too busy trying to calm yourself down enough so you didn’t hear your heartbeat in your ears anymore. Suddenly, your phone buzzed. It was a message from Tom.

“Please let me explain.”

You locked your phone and put it on the table face down. It buzzed again.

“It’s not what you think.”

You put it back on the table. It buzzed again.

“It’s publicity. We’re not really dating; Marvel just wants to get some buzz going on around me.”

You finally decided to reply.

“Who’s this?”

He responded instantly.

“I know you still have my number saved Y/N. I thought about calling you a million times but could never bring myself to do it. Please let me just explain everything to you.”

You put your phone on Do Not Disturb and set it on the table. You tried to pay attention but ultimately failed. You didn’t mind however; you were nominated for the biggest award of the night which usually meant that one was going to be dead last. You sat in your seat and messed with the beautiful dessert on the plate in front of you. Oh how one person can ruin what was supposed to be the most important night of your life. Oh and how much you hated that a guy you haven’t seen or talked to in almost 2 years could ruin it so easily.

Suddenly your phone started vibrating again, only it was a phone call. You were scared it was Tom but decided to check anyway. It was your sister. You showed Jane who was calling and she nodded as you stepped into the lobby.

“Hello?”

“SIS! HERMANA! UUUHHH MY WATER BROKE SO UUUHHH IM ON MY WAY TO THE- OH FUCK! OH MY GOD THIS SHIT HURTS!”

“What?! Samantha?!”

Someone else took the phone from your sister.

“Mija, its happening. We thought we would let you know so you could enjoy your night and look forward to meeting your niece or nephew later tonight, hopefully.”

You could hear screams from your sister.

“Later tonight?! No ma! I’m not missing my only sister giving birth to her kid! She’s not doing this without me!”

“Mija no te vas a faltar recibiendo ese premio.” “Sweetheart you’re not going to miss out on getting that award.”

Your abuela sounded so calm compared to your sister and mother.

“Abuela nothing is more important that being with you guys when that baby gets here. I’m not leaving my sister alone in there with you two crazies.”

Your abuela let out a laugh.

“But Y/N you didn’t drive, how are you going to get there?”

You froze suddenly realizing your mom was right. You and Jane had been picked up by one of the drivers the event sent for you.

“Don’t worry about that, I’ll be there.”

You clicked and turned around. You jumped almost 5 feet in the air when you saw Tom standing behind you. He scared the shit out of you.

“What the fuuuck!”

“Shit sorry I didn’t mean to scare you.”

You nodded and tried to walk past him but he stopped you.

“I came in my car,” he said taking out his car keys.

You eyed him carefully.

“Look I know right now I’m the last person you want to sit in a car with, but Y/N I have a car and your sister has gone into labor so you haven’t got many options.”

“Where’s it parked?”

“The valet recognized me and put it in the first spot closest to the exit.”

You sighed and pointed toward the lobby doors.

“Lets go, my sister is about to have a fucking baby.”

The two of you sprinted toward his car and exited quickly. You texted Jane the entire situation, letting her know that if you do win for some reason to go up there and read the speech you had written on a sheet of paper in your clutch you left on the table. She was freaking out on you for leaving but she also understood. For you it was always going to be family first.

You drove in silence for a bit. Suddenly Tom spoke.

“So Samantha’s pregnant. Congrats. When did that happen.”

“No offence but that’s none of your business,” you said with your eyes glued to the road. There was a bit of traffic but you were a bit closer than your mom to the hospital so you hoped to get there in time.

“I’ve missed you.”

The words felt like he was pulling your heart out of your chest and started stomping all over it. You saw the hospital on the next street.

“You can leave me out front.”

“No offence but I may come to your advantage. I’ve come to do charity work here before, they love me. There’s no faster way of getting where you need to go than walking in there with a celebrity they love.”

You rolled your eyes, but said nothing. You knew he was right, and you didn’t want to risk missing your sister giving birth. He turned into the parking lot and pulled the window down. The parking attendant’s face lit up.

“Mr. Holland! What brings you here tonight?”

“Hey bud! So I kind of got a family member who’s just gone into labor in there and I need to get in there and to her as quickly as possible.

“Sister or a cousin or something?” he said grabbing his walkie.

“Girlfriend’s sister.”

You don’t know how but within 5 minutes you were walking into the waiting room of Labor and Delivery. You saw your aunts and cousins taking up some of the seats in the corner. Your cousins lit up when they saw Tom, they recognized him as Spider-Man. Your aunts, however, recognized him as your ex. You walked over to greet them.

“Long story. He’ll keep the kids busy. Where’s Sam?”

They pointed you to the doctor who had just walked out.

“I’m looking for Y/N Y/L/N?”

“That’s me,” you said walking over to him.

“Your sister is looking for you. It’s time.”

You turned to look at Tom who gave you a reassuring smile as he was already knelt down playing with your cousins.

“Keep them busy please. And thanks.”

You turned around and walked behind the doctor.

It seemed like the longest two hours of your life. There were a few complications but you finally had a tiny, perfect baby nephew. They moved your sister in one of the rooms and because she seemed to be okay they said she could have just adults come visit her. You smiled and walked out to get your aunts.

“He’s perfect. You guys can go see him, I’ll stay out here a bit.”

The smiled and kissed you on the cheek as they walked to your sister’s room. You turned and saw all of your cousins folded in chairs fast asleep. Tom was in the middle of them, carrying your 2-year-old godson in his lap. They were both fast asleep, your godson was leaning his head against his chest and Tom had his head against the wall. Just the sight of him made you instantly fall in love with him all over again. Your stomach couldn’t stop doing cartwheels. You quickly took a picture of the sight, not making a single noise. No matter what happened between you two, you wanted this moment to last forever.

Taglist: @tom-hollands-eyelash @colourful-fandoms-ruined-my-blog @greenarrowhead @minispidey @beautiful-holland @hazhasmycoffee @truthfulchange @hollandlovely @cutiepie-holland @thothollandd

strikethrough means you asked to be part of the taglist and i couldnt tag you for some reason!

[partlycharlie-archive]

gender? who is she? (they???)

chapter one: what’s my name again? link to prologue

summary: [18:00] ???: LUNA [18:00] ???: WHAT IF [??? (SumayaPotter) changed their name to harry?] [18:00] harry?: !!!!!! word count: 1,573 warnings: n/a a/n: we’re getting into it!!! hope u enjoy

read on ao3

[FRIDAY; 10.12.18]

  the golden trio™ [POTter (SumayaPotter), grangerstranger (HermioneGranger), DieselWeasel (RonWeasley)]

  [16:45] POTter: @everyone

[17:34] grangerstranger: What’s a mood [17:34] grangerstranger: Sorry [17:34] grangerstranger: What’s up

[17:36] DieselWeasel: how do you accidentally type whats a mood

[17:36] grangerstranger: Magic [17:36] grangerstranger: And a conversation going on next to me

[17:37] DieselWeasel: okay [17:37] DieselWeasel: sounds fake but . okay [17:37] DieselWeasel: a n y w a y [17:37] DieselWeasel: @POTter whats up

[17:40] POTter: oH [17:40] POTter: yh sry [17:40] POTter: if yall were th opp sex wht wld ur names b ?

[17:41] grangerstranger: Sorry just [17:41] grangerstranger: Give me a minute to decipher that

[17:41] DieselWeasel: #rekt

[17:41] POTter: r00d

[17:42] grangerstranger: Wait Maya

[17:42] POTter: ye

[17:42] grangerstranger: As in what our parents would've named us or what we'd want our names to be if we were the opposite sex

[17:42] POTter: idc both

[17:43] grangerstranger: William

[17:43] POTter: y

[17:43] grangerstranger: Well [17:43] grangerstranger: I don’t know what my parents were thinking when they named me [17:44] grangerstranger: But the name Hermione is from the winter’s tale by Shakespeare [17:44] grangerstranger: I'm not the hugest fan of Shakespeare but I'd still like to have an older name [17:44] grangerstranger: Plus his first name was William so it's still a nod to my parents

[17:44] POTter: damn out here w tht Knowledge [17:45] POTter: ron????

[17:46] DieselWeasel: uhhhhhhh [17:46] DieselWeasel: i mean if i had been born a girl it wouldve been ginerva bc yall KNOW ma and dad have been holding onto that for ages [17:46] DieselWeasel: but . harper maybe? i like that name

[17:46] POTter: huh [17:46] POTter: harperd fit u

[17:47] DieselWeasel: what about you

[17:50] POTter: idk [17:50] POTter: what do u think

[17:50] grangerstranger: Alex [17:50] grangerstranger: ?

[17:51] DieselWeasel: i mean ? would you want like [17:51] DieselWeasel: an ethnic name ? [17:53] DieselWeasel: imagine quotes on that lol

[17:53] POTter: ehhhhhhh [17:53] POTter: i wldnt b opposed but ? [17:54] POTter: idk rly i guess itd be cool either way [17:54] POTter: also @grangerstranger alex is nice

[17:54] DieselWeasel: mkay [17:56] DieselWeasel: what about harry [17:56] DieselWeasel: hari ? harry ? who knows

[17:56] POTter: OH [17:56] POTter: y e s [17:56] POTter: thank

[17:59] DieselWeasel: uh ? [17:59] DieselWeasel: no problem lol [17:59] DieselWeasel: :)

  ??? (SumayaPotter), luna! (LunaLovegood)

 [18:00] ???: LUNA [18:00] ???: WHAT IF

[??? (SumayaPotter) changed their name to hari?]

[18:00] hari?: !!!!!! [18:00] hari?: wait wait wait

[hari? (SumayaPotter) changed their name to harry?]

[18:01] harry?: i like this better i think [18:01] harry?: idk im still trying 2 figure it out

[18:04] luna!: oh! that's a lovely name. congratulations harry! i'm glad you've found something that suits you. :D

[18:04] harry?: :D

 ---

  [SATURDAY; 10.13.18]

  everyone except sumaya [granger (HermioneGranger), weasley_1 (RonWeasley), weasley_2 (GinnyWeasley), malfoy (DracoMalfoy), longbottom (NevilleLongbottom)…]

 [13:35] granger: I just want all of you to know I still disagree with the name of this chat

[14:57] malfoy: Yes, yes, we know. [14:57] malfoy: You’ve been saying that since the creation of this groupchat.

[15:15] weasley_1: #rekt

[15:28] granger: Shut up malfoy

[15:28] weasley_1: #rekt

[16:01] longbottom: ok but we haven’t had to use this chat for a couple weeks now? what’s up hermione?

[16:01] weasley_1: sus acting weird

[16:01] longbottom: okay but she’s always acting weird, what’s different about this time?

[16:02] weasley_1: we had an entire conversation about what our names would be if we were the opposite sex

[16:02] longbottom: oh. [16:02] longbottom: yeah okay that’s a bit weird. [16:02] longbottom: what did she say her’s would be?

[16:02] granger: That's the thing though [16:03] granger: She didn’t [16:03] granger: She asked us what we thought it should be

[16:03] weasley_1: here gimme a sec

[weasley_1 (RonWeasley) sent a screenshot.] [weasley_1 (RonWeasley) sent a screenshot.]

[16:05] parkinson: im dead her name is my MOOD

[16:05] longbottom: damn. okay. [16:05] longbottom: what do you think it means?

[16:06] weasley_1: i dunno why does it have to mean anything

[16:06] longbottom: well, obviously you think it means something - you wouldn’t have posted it here if you didn’t?

[16:06] weasley_1: damn youre right [16:07] weasley_1: i dunno? it just feels like kind of an odd thing to ask about ? [16:07] weasley_1: especially because its not like we were talking about names today or anything [16:07] weasley_1: it just seemed like an out of the blue subject thats all

[16:09] lovegood: if i may interject? i find it very likely that sumaya is simply settling into their personality, and part of that may include an exploration of the different facets of themself! [16:09] lovegood: her*, whoops!

[16:09] weasley_1: ? [16:09] weasley_1: oh okay

[16:09] longbottom: you’re so right, luna!

[16:09] weasley_1: huh yeah that makes sense lol

  #girlsforluna (GinnyWeasley), #boysforluna (NevilleLongbottom)

 [16:10] #girlsforluna: gay

[16:11] #boysforluna: :’) [16:11] #boysforluna: i can’t help it! she’s so [16:11] #boysforluna: wait.

  everyone except sumaya [weasley_1 (RonWeasley), longbottom (NevilleLongbottom), lovegood (LunaLovegood), granger (HermioneGranger), malfoy (DracoMalfoy)…]

 [16:12] longbottom: hey, @lovegood?

[16:13] lovegood: yes! hi neville!

[16:13] longbottom: hey! what pronouns are you using right now?

[16:13] lovegood: he/him for now! :)

[16:13] longbottom: okay! thanks so much.

[16:14] weasley_2: neville you fucking nerd i cant,,,,,,

  #girlsforluna (GinnyWeasley), #boysforluna (NevilleLongbottom)

 [16:12] #girlsforluna: you okay??? [16:13] #girlsforluna: oh my god lmfao

[16:14] #boysforluna: okay, i got it. [16:14] #boysforluna: he’s just so cute! and smart! and kind! and! ugh my god i love him so much.

[16:14] #girlsforluna: youre so fucking cute i wanna die [16:14] #girlsforluna: you really just paused an online conversation to get pronouns i love you oh my god [16:14] #girlsforluna: also. i feel you so hard he’s such a lovely person??? hhhh [16:14] #girlsforluna: anyway :)

[16:14] #boysforluna: :)

  everyone except sumaya [weasley_2 (GinnyWeasley), longbottom (NevilleLongbottom), lovegood (LunaLovegood), weasley_1 (RonWeasley), granger (HermioneGranger)…]

[16:15] lovegood: is everything okay, neville?

[16:16] weasley_2: oh yeah totally i just had the sudden and urgent realization that neville’s a fucking nerd

[16:16] longbottom: shut the hell up n stop ghosting u hoe

[16:17] parkinson: damn son okay [16:17] parkinson: i dont know if im more surprised tht u cursed or tht u didnt use Perfect Punctuation ???? either way im lowkey impressed good job

[16:17] longbottom: :)

  mione (HermioneGranger), nevs (NevilleLongbottom)

 [16:46] mione: Hey neville

[17:09] nevs: yeah, what’s up?

[17:11] mione: Do you think sue might be [17:11] mione: Trans or something?

[17:11] nevs: huh. [17:11] nevs: i guess i’d never thought of it but. [17:11] nevs: i suppose it’s entirely possible? [17:12] nevs: especially because she’s been wearing her hijab more often.

[17:12] mione: Yeah [17:12] mione: Wait but why would that mean shes trans?

[17:13] nevs: well, she has really long hair, and when she’s not wearing a hijab she usually has it in a braid because it’s easier to manage, right?

[17:13] mione: Yeah I know what hou mean [17:13] mione: You

[17:13] nevs: but it’s also a constant reminder that she has hair. [17:13] nevs: i mean, i was talking to luna the other day? [17:14] nevs: and he mentioned that on his masculine days he like to put his hair up, but only when he’s feeling really dysphoric. [17:14] granger: so now that i think about it in that light, it makes a lot of sense - [17:15] nevs: her hair goes into a bun when she puts it up, and it’s tight so she doesn’t have to think about it so much.

[17:15] mione: Oh [17:15] mione: Yeah that makes sense [17:16] mione: Thanks Neville

[17:16] nevs: no problem! [17:16] nevs: i probably wouldn’t go around sharing this with everyone, though. [17:16] nevs: especially because we don’t really know if it’s true or not.

[17:17] mione: Yeah of course

  hermyownknee (HermioneGranger), ronniekins (RonWeasley)

 [17:20] hermyownknee: Hey Ron

 ---

  ron (RonWeasley), luna (LunaLovegood)

 [17:34] ron: hey luna

[17:38] luna: hello, ron! is everything okay?

[17:38] ron: um . i think so?

[17:38] luna: okay! [17:40] luna: what did you want to talk to me about? [17:40] luna: i assume you contacted me for a reason? :)

[17:40] ron: haha yeah [17:40] ron: um [17:40] ron: dont take this the wrong way [17:41] ron: i know sometimes sumaya tells you stuff that she doesn’t tell me or hermione [17:41] ron: and that’s fine [17:41] ron: obviously shes allowed to make those kinds of decisions for herself [17:41] ron: but uh

[17:41] luna: she’s fine, i promise. [17:42] luna: i would tell you if she told me anything that i found concerning.

[17:44] ron: okay [17:44] ron: thanks

[17:50] luna: of course, ron.

[homieswithhades]

BTS Analysis;

I don’t even know if I can call this an unpopular opinion bc I know some people agree with this, this is more of an in-depth analysis and personal experience I guess. It’s all about bts... and its lowkey a mess. I apologise in advance for any grammar/spelling errors, and times I may contradict myself a bit. This is something that REALLY bothers me. I just want to clarify that I love bts a lot, and that I was the HUGEST STAN for a good 5ish months. I still stan them but not as much due to the following reasons.

They just don’t make good music anymore.  They love yourself era was when everything turned to shit. The actual core love yourself concept is very good but,,,, it was executed really poorly.

Dna was my first comeback with them, even though I’ve been listening to them since august 2016. But when actually became a stan in April 2017, I was obsessed with them. I was so damn excited for their September 2017 cb that my standards were through the roof. During the summer they changed the logo and did the beyond the scene thing,,, that’s the first thing that kind of irked me,,, and then they did the highlight reels in the style of I need u and they were redeemed.

When love yourself her started promotions and teasers, the bar was higher than the person who edited the DNA mv. The concept pics were so unfitting??? And just lacked that aesthetic element. I dint like them at all,,,, and the album cover was,,, below standard and looked rushed and lazily designed. But when serendipity came out I loved it (and I still do) so that fuelled my expectations for the music, even though they weren’t really that damaged by the odd first impression of the album. But then DNA came out and???? I was so disappointed?????? The beat was so annoying,,, the mv was so ugly,, the outfits were ugly,,, the lyrics were weird. In other words DNA was just a straight up flop... I hoped the rest of the album would have been better but,,,, it really, REALLY wasn’t.

After love yourself her I lost a lot of interest in bts. I missed their old music so much, and I was genuinely upset over it. I didn’t follow them as closely as I used to. I started to joke about them with my friends who lost interest in bts before me, but I still missed the old bts so much. The whole Ellen show thing, all the western media like Buzzfeed and Billboard making vids and articles about bts, all the rigged award shows, it pissed me off bc they were getting famous in the US bc of their worst album that didn’t display their full potential at all!!!!

Imma just go out and say it, armys are one of the most toxic fandoms ever.

Sometimes they’re just plain disrespectful and starting arguments where they don’t belong. I wouldn’t be able to count how many times I got attacked on Twitter, Instagram and even in the YouTube comments for expressing a different opinion. I remember all the fan wars and scandals. All the mobs at airports, All the times k-fans and i-fans tried to ruin another groups reputation (I’m not saying other fans never did this, bc it was always a thing, but it was never this extreme.) and the fuckin credit card thing oh my god,,,, a huge shitstorm caused by one fandom that lasts for years on end.

When bts got really mainstream, and gained more young western fans, they really ruined bts even further for me. Not to mention all the cringey tweets and memes, they hurt to look at. I absolutely don’t mind the “you got no jams” meme or the “ExCuSE mE” one, bc theyre just pure goof from the members, but when armys took it and overused it, that’s when it started to get annoying.

Some armys genuinely think bts is the only kpop group and that the world revolves around them. They comment “annyeonghaseyo any armys here???!!!” in the most unexpected places, I deadass saw someone on my overwatch team playing quick play with the name “army.FOREVER.saranghae” yall do realise it costs 10$ to change ur blizzard username, right?

Some armys also don’t respect other kpop groups in older gens (or any other ones for that matter) and assume that bts broke through into the western world themselves, which is complete bullshit, without groups like bigbang, shinee, tvxq, shinhwa, h.o.t,  seo taiji boys etc etc (and other ones I don’t know of rip) kpop would have never gotten into the western world.

I never identified as an army bc I knew they were cringey bc of my friends who were HUGE armys back in 2016 and low-key koreaboos, and I knew what the bad stans looked like, so I never associated with them, and just called myself a bts stan. But the whole western situation just got so goddamn worse. I was sick of the Americans plaguing bts for me.

I also wanna say, I know not all armys are toxic and cringey. And I respect the level headed and chill Armys, yall are doing it right.

Moving on from Armys, I noticed a change in bts themselves. Namjoon changed his stage name, which absolutely sent me. I understand the meaning behind it but for some reason I felt that he did it to be fake deep? Or woke, and that he tried to completely cover-up his past self. The other members became cocky and were always draped in all that ugly Gucci and designer shit. I knew they were being forced to act the way they were acting, bc I know them well. I know how they really are. I know that they’re good people. I know they’re very humble deep down. They had that special connection with their fans before, that made u feel like u were good friends with them, and they absolutely ruined that. They’re being forced to put on this fake image to impress you filthy Americans.

I still stan bts atm. But I stan them for their old music and the people they truly are, not who they are portrayed to be. I can’t remember when euphoria came out, but I was kinda annoyed they tried to incorporate hyyh prologue into their shitty concept. And the song was also annoying and too edm-ish (like most of their new songs, idk why their style completely changed). Anyway, when tear came out, I was still kinda off the bandwagon, and I saw the concept pics and I was surprised at how nice they were. I saw the album cover, which was still ugly but better than the previous one. Then Singularity came out and!!!!! I loved it a lot. And then fake love happened. Oof is all I have to say. But some songs on the album, were actually good. Like the truth untold, paradise and OUTRO TEAR. Outro tear will remain the best song in the love yourself trilogy.

I also feel that I have to acknowledge that for all the love yourself albums only the intro and outro were genuinely up to standard (except outro answer).

Then came love yourself answer and idol. When I found out they were collabing with niki minaj I lost it. The concept pics were ugly once again, it was supposed to a controversial comeback???? And??? It wasn’t. I’m honestly glad it wasn’t promoted.

I noticed a repetitiveness with songs on answer. The beat was off with the singing. It was all just a mess. I also noticed the amount of godddamn auto tune in the songs (eg, mic drop, fake love, idol, airplane pt.2 and others I can’t remember atm) all of bts’s old songs all sound unique and different, and they all had this “emotional” element to them, to elaborate on that, compare dna, fake love or idol to save me, I need u or young forever. Notice how dna, fake love and idol convey absolutely no emotion through the lyrics or the actual beat of the song, unlike save me, I need u or young forever, that literally have more sentimental/emotional value in the few English lines that are in the song then all of the lyrics in their 3 new title tracks combined. I think this is my most difficult point to explain bc different songs make people feel different things, but it’s no doubt that you can tell the difference between a song that’s made to appeal to the masses with no unique properties to a song that coveys deep emotion (whatever the emotion may be) through the beat, the lyrics and the sound of the vocals/rapping alike. Listen to intro nevermind, and then listen to go go and just try to tell me that im wrong.

Alos, bts seem to have incorporated auto tune into songs, especially on their vocalists. bts don’t need the auto tune bc they’re good vocalists. Also, I have to mention, the vocal line isn’t the “best” per say. they’re good vocalists but it’s nothing special. Seokjin is the best vocalist period. Jungkook’s voice is generic, and in recent songs he has been straining it to reach the notes. Taehyungs voice isn’t even that special, it’s just deep, and it only really suits ballads and R&B songs like singularity or butterfly. Jimin has a very nice voice, but again, it’s nothing extraordinary. I feel that Jin has the most vocal potential, and he doesn’t get to show it, he has this really unique voice, idk what it is about it that just??? I really love it. But to clarify, I’m not hating on their voices or saying there untalented, because they’re very talented, but most of vocal line gets too much credit. As for rap line, I think they’re one of bts’s strongest points. Namjoons style is so smooth and just overall good? It amazes me that he rapped so well over the years with a breathing problem. Hoseok is a good rapper too, his sound is unique and his adlibs add to that uniqueness in older songs, as for Yoongi, I genuinely think he’s one of the best rappers in the industry, it’s not about the speed element, it’s about his flow, his power, his emotion, everything about his rap is just amazing.

Now I wanna talk about the member’s individual popularity. The maknae line has the most stans, and quite frankly, their stans are the worst. Treat all of the members with the same love and respect. Sure, it’s perfectly fine to have a bias but to disregard the other members is just plain wrong.

Bts are human beings, first and foremost, and then there musicians second. They’re being made into media puppets and clout bait, which they absolutely don’t deserve. They deserve recognition for their good stuff, which they have PLENTY of.

All in all, I’m sick of the American attention. It’s cringey, annoying and unnecessary. Sure, bts deserve recognition but not that much of it!!!!!!

And they were being recognised for the wrong thing for fucks sake!!!! I didn’t like ANY of the new songs on answer. I only liked epiphany. And then I found out it wasn’t written by any of the members. Rip. Fans will unfortunately blindly follow, stream and like whatever they put out like blind sheep because it’s accustomed to them, bighit KNOW that they’ll make more money in America. They know no matter what bts put out, no matter how shit it is, fans will like it and itll be revenue for the company. And all the mobile games and the bt21??? Was so unnecessary?? Capitalism amirite? Quantity over quality. It’s the sad truth.

Armys tend to mix up criticism and hate. Although there is a very thin line between the two, there is a difference. Criticism is the analysis and judgement of the merits and faults of something. Hate is blind and unjustified. Hate is disliking something for no reason, or for a very invalid reason. So for example, saying; “I don’t like this apple because its bitter and im not a huge fan of bitter things” is fine to say, unlike, “FUCK THIS APPLE BECAUSE ITS BITTER, FUCK ALL APPLES” you know? It’s okay to dislike a group. It’s NOT okay to hate on a group. No one’s is going to gain anything by hate.

So, all the youtubers are reacting to bts for clout, the fandom is a fucking mess, armys are attacking other fandoms for no reason, the members lost their TRUE humbleness and neglected their real personalities and they’ve put out 3 overall bad standard albums over the course of a whole ass year.

But I still have this spark of hope for them. Why? Because I love them, they have a special place in my heart. I know they have the potential to be amazing, unique and just overall good people with their own personalities, and truly special musical abilities.

After their tour I honestly, really hope the attention dies down and they put out another good, original, album like the hyyh albums, with nice concepts, good songs, and a pleasant to look at mv. It’s really all I ask for. The old bts. I know I’ll never get them back, and I absolutely cherish their old stuff, like the bulletproof logo, bangtan boys, rap monster, hyyh, young forever, no more dream, wings, them all goofing around together and not caring about their image, their wholesome interactions with fans, and all the songs and concepts and theories that never have, and never will be recognised.

On a final note, I realise I can’t blame bts themselves entirely for this. This stuff is only partially “their fault”. Its bighit’s fault, the army’s and haters fault and the media’s fault. But, America is to blame the most. That’s all for today.

[shsl-seinen]

yall mind if i be a sap for a bit

“cue jfc its only been a day since endgame pause” shut

i could always draft this for ACTUAL endgame but. thatll prolly get a post of its own, should there be new experiences from endgame planning and pregame rp or something

i already said this in the skype chat but like, it still doesnt feel like a year for me

sure my memory is shit but the things i remember as clear as day is how ecstatic i was seeing ai’s name on the roster list on sept. 18th and how absolutely excited i was approximately one year ago, october 23rd, when prologue was starting. i was with friends at a marketplace w/ a lil photo booth and already told them that i was excited for this thing and i was clutching my phone and everything, since uh

at the time i was still alienated at the fact that i got into doubt fucking academy, (iirc that has a twitter thread on its own on my twit lol) and like. i didnt have much confidence in my OCs. i was often quiet about them and shit and barely talked about them or really developed them thru conversation compared to my friends. so like, even the simple process of filling in an app and being in a hopeful chat was the one time i could develop and babble about my OC regardless of acceptance into a group for not

speaking of, im...really happy with my experience here

theres a few moments i can pinpoint that i liked abt doubt: ch2 was fucking lit because of the goddamn tension and just my realization as i inves’d like “OH SHIT, SOMEONES TRYNA FRAME AI!!!!! SHIT” and the drama in trial, ch5 was a fucking doozy in a whole because of the event, the motive, the MURDER CASE, TRIAL and like. merge. shit dude

also: this is the first DR game i’ve ever stuck with that actually made it thru to endgame, and the first ive ever been a victim in. planning that case was really fun so shoutout to ellie noot and meg on that one

and like, i say “NO DONT LOV MY GIRL, SHES TOO RUDE” a lot when ppl say they love ai, but like, realtalk. realtalk? im extremely relived and so so so so glad you enjoyed ai and how i played her throughout the game. im seriously really grateful for that. i dont think i can begin to count how many times i was worried on whether or not i was portraying her correctly and shit bc, and this is no exaggeration--i love everyone’s oc. everyone’s is so great in their own right and so well developed as a character, and i love how everyone plays their oc. from tora and parelthon--well at this point i can say telos, right

its gonna be alienating seeing this thing end in...like, two months from now right? ill be reading this and going “this marks the end of a game i spent sophmore year with. my sophmore year was defined by many things and da6 was a fairly big one and now its.........ending” i...idk if ill cry or not but just

I really enjoyed this game--and geez i gotta stop talking in past tense because like

I WANNA! LIKE! KEEP IN TOUCH W/ YALL? IN WHATEVER WAYS

WE END UP APPING TO THE SAME GAME? WE ADD EACH OTHER ON STEAM? DISCORD? BATTLE DOT NET? LIT, LIKE. YALL ARE FUN TO CHAT WITH!!!!!

really. seriously

thank you all for making my first BIG dr oc experience a great one