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cobiehaven · 2 years ago

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Heartbreaker — Kim Sunwoo

SYNOPSIS; sunwoo broke your heart but why does he still act like nothing happened? you dared to ask him but you knew you were going to have to find out the truth at some point, right?

PARING; persistent!sunwoo x heartbroken!reader, ft. changmin !!

GENRE; just angst. only angst. all angst.

WORD COUNT; 2.1k

TAGS/WARNINGS; persistent!sunwoo, heartbroken!reader, depressed!reader, bestie!changmin, caring!changmin, changmin works for door dash LMFAOOO, mention of suicide, reader has a love hate relationship with sunwoo, story with no valid conclusion.

AUTHORS NOTE; i’m not gonna lie- i teared up thinking about how sad this was. im sorry if i didn’t execute it the way that i thought it in my head. i hope you all see the kinds of feelings that im feeling through this story, a lot of them were based on how i felt in my own personal experiences.

you don’t know how long it has been.

how long its been since you looked at your phone or how long its been since you’ve gotten out of bed.

when was the last time you took a shower or made yourself a proper meal? the most you’ve done is probably get up to pee.

but with the lack of nutrition, it was even hard to do that sometimes.

depression was not something to take lightly. everyone knew that. especially if it was mixed in with heartbreak.

it could really mess up somebody.

and that was exactly what you were experiencing.

the same kind of messing up.

to sum up the unfortunate story of your disgusting break up, it was an understatement to say you hated your ex-boyfriend. three weeks ago, he cheated on you. and that was something you were not going to tolerate with when you and him had been in a long-lasting relationship of 2 years. you had gotten sent a picture by someone who had went to the same party as sunwoo, that night. in the picture, he was kissing another girl. you don’t know why you were so surprised, he’s always had people around him all the time. both girls and boys were attracted to him wether it was platonic or not.

you suppose the reason why you feel so broken, is the fact that he always gave you a reason to believe that he would never do such a thing to hurt you.

there was never a time that you felt unloved when you were with him. he always made sure to make time for you even when he, himself, was at his worst. he knew you like you knew the back of your own hand. he knew exactly what you order at all of your favorite restaurants, he knew what your favorite comfort food was when you finished watching a sad movie, he knew just what to do when you stayed home in bed because of how bad your cramps were. he knew what the size of your clothes were and always made sure to get them one size bigger so the both of you could wear them back to back. he always made sure to leave his cologne out on the bedside table so you could give yourself a little spritz of it whenever you missed him more than anyone else. and he always made sure to be there for you when you were having a rough time.

the day you found out he cheated on you, you cried for as long as your exhaustion could take you. when he came home that night, you didn’t have the strength to say much to him. he asked you over and over what was wrong, what he could have possibly done to make you sob to the point of bloodshot eyes.

you told him to get out with no explanation. he knew what he did yet you still don’t know why he acted like he was still innocent.

you dare to ask him about it, though.

once he packed all of his things with you watching from afar, he gave you one last saddened look before locking the door behind him.

those eyes stuck with you. you couldn’t forget the amount of worry and sorrow that was behind them. but even so, you weren’t even sure if you could look at him the same anymore. no matter what he did to try and make up his mistake to you. you could barely even look at your phone without drowning in the anxiety of seeing his face pop up on your lock screen.

suddenly, your thoughts were interrupted when you felt a strong vibration come from your phone, across the bed. you knew exactly who it was and you didn’t dare to look at your phone. but no matter how strong your will was, you gave in to the pure curiosity of what he had to say this time.

sunwoo:

y/n, i know you’re reading these.

please

just respond? let me know how you are

i’m worried.

it’s been weeks

none of your friends have seen you either

i keep asking every day but they know as little as i do

i know i’m the last person you want to talk to and we don’t have to talk about what happened, but please at least say something to let me know you haven’t completely given up.

i know you better than anyone else

you stared at the messages. you contemplated wether to text back or not. although you were curious as to what he had to say, it didn’t delve deep enough for you to bring up the courage to respond.

thank god your read receipts weren’t on.

putting down your phone again, you sighed and rolled over. you had forgotten to check the time but you were certain it was at least mid-day by now. everyday around this time, you battled with yourself to get up and do something productive. but your lack of motivation won every time.

luckily, today didn’t feel as bad as the others. usually you would be swimming in exhaustion.

you silently dragged yourself out of bed, using the little strength you had to rake through your heavily knotted hair and brush your teeth. you desperately needed a shower but you weren’t sure if you were up for that. the longest you’ve gone without one was probably 5 days. you were thankful that your hair didn’t get greasy easily.

the next thing you did was order food. door dash was probably the closest to being your best friend nowadays. you were certain that most of the groceries in the fridge had gone bad by now, as the last time you went shopping was with sunwoo a week or two before the whole incident. even if there was something good in the kitchen to make, you probably wouldn’t even be up for that either. you were also thankful that sunwoo left some of his backed up money behind because without it, you’d probably be hospitalized by now.

gosh, you loved being the emotionally broken one.

maybe this was a sign to start going to therapy? you sighed. it would be a nice thought if you didn’t hate the idea of talking about your problems to a random stranger.

you flinched when you heard your phone buzz violently on your bedside table, looking over at the device and rolling your eyes when it was sunwoo. again.

sunwoo:

please answer..

okay, maybe you did feel bad for ghosting him. something told you that this message was much more meaningful than the other ones. that maybe he was actually sorry.

you sighed for probably the millionth time that day, trying to build up the courage to actually send a message back.

you:

you sure have a lot to say

sunwoo:

oh my god.

you answered!

you:

im not dead if that’s what you thought was going on.

i wouldn’t give up that easily.

you definitely thought about it.

sunwoo:

how have you been?

why haven’t you come to school?

why haven’t you been talking to your friends?

why was he so persistent? he knows you don’t want to talk to him. it gave you a headache. you were really starting to wonder why you were still heartbroken over this man.

putting your phone down after leaving him on delivered, which seemed to be a common occurrence for you now, you were happy to see that your food arrived peacefully. what you weren’t happy to see was the person who delivered it.

it was one of your school friends, changmin. one of the ones who would definitely have been curious to know how you have been for the past few weeks. since when did he start delivering food?

“y/n? how long has it been? i’ve been texting you!”

you were going to be honest.. you haven’t even been looking at any of your messages unless they were from your parents or sunwoo.

which you only responded to your parents.

“aren’t you here to give me my food?”

“right,” he quickly took the money you had in your hand and shoved it into his pocket, handing you the bag. “uhm.. i know you might not want to hear this but people are really looking forward to seeing you back at school. we’re all worried about you and sunwoo.” this spiked your interest.

“has sunwoo not been at school?”

“he has. it’s just…”

“what? it’s just what?”

“he’s been with another girl everyday since you’ve been gone.”

you should have expected to hear that. it was the whole reason you were upset at him in the first place. the whole reason you couldn’t bare to even step outside anymore. it was probably the same girl he kissed in the photo.. you were angry. furious at him for cheating on you, asking you if you were okay, texting you every day all while he was still seeing someone else. granted, you both have broken up but still.. it hurt.

you fought to hold back tears at the thought of him loving up on someone else behind your back even though he wasn’t yours anymore.

but you failed.

changmin dropped to your side as you cried into his shoulder. your knuckles turning white from how hard you were gripping onto his thin shirt. you wanted nothing more than the ground to open up and swallow you whole. the same common feeling you felt for the past 3 weeks.

you cried for a while, your friend not making any effort to move or get back to his job. his only way of comfort was dropping whatever he had left in his hands and hugging your frail body. he frowned at how thin your body had gotten since he last time he saw you.

“can i stay for a while?”

“don’t you have a job?”

“you were my last delivery.”

somehow you didn’t believe that but you nodded anyways. feeling much more comfortable with him now that he knew exactly what your situation was. he comforted you enough to try and move you to the couch, taking the food with him.

“i’m not hungry anymore..” your appetite was ruined now. “you and i both know that you need to get something into your system.”

well, you couldn’t argue with that.

you both sat in whimpering silence as he helped you with your food, being with you the entire step of the way from feeding you to going back to laying down in the comfort of your bed. “y/n, i think that maybe you should actually have a talk with sunwoo,” changmin frowned at your tired state. “i don’t even think i could handle listening to his lame excuses,” you spat with rising anger.

“i know you have a lot of negative feelings about the whole thing but i really think it would help you to get over it if you just made things clear with him.”

“he doesn’t deserve my time.”

“but i think you deserve his.”

you didn’t want to think too hard about whatever kind of point changmin was trying to get across to you, but the more he said something about how your life is literally turning out to be the worse for yourself without confirmation from sunwoo, the more you started to realize that maybe he was right.

but still, you just couldn’t shake the feeling that maybe. just maybe. you could find it in yourself to get over him without an explanation as to why he cheated on you.

“i’ll think about it.”

he nodded, tucking you into bed and doing all of the basic needs for you like plugging in your phone and turning the lights off before finishing throwing away all of the trash and dirty dishes you had laying around the room.

“will you think about coming to school tomorrow?” he asked on his way out of the bedroom.

“will you be there?” you asked, lifting up your head from your pillow to stare at him in the doorway. “only if you are,” he smiled, to which you faintly gave him one back.

he gave you one last look before closing the door behind him to leave you in peace.

almost just like before, those eyes seemed to stick with you the entire night.

THE CONCLUSION

sunwoo:

the picture you received that night wasn’t real.

it was fake.

i’m so sorry that was that had been bothering you all of this time.

if i had known sooner, i would have made it clear that i would never cheat on you with someone else!

the girl i am with now, i swear it’s not what it looks like. i know you have heard things about her and i.

but my relationship with her it’s only platonic! i promise.

she wants me but i want you..

i still think about you

i still worry for you

i still care for you

and ill still do whatever i can to make it seem that way

i love you.

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boydepartment · 10 months ago

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ive noticed you tend to apologise a lot when youre tired and taking a break 😅 you shouldnt do that. youre a human, of course you'd feel tired sometimes. hope youre taking enough rest and recovering soon, no pressure to take and accept requests.

im sorry your interview went weird, but its good you pulled back the moment you found it sketchy. hopefully youd get a chance to accomplish your dream sometime soon in the future! take care jayjay

-🎄

hi it’s okay 🎄 anon :) i’m gonna use your ask to talk abt something if that’s okay, this isn’t @ you, i pinky promise.

i’m gonna be honest after valentine’s day i might just leave this account ? i don’t think ill delete anything but i just can’t be on tumblr or read any of the content i used to. i talked about it a bit a couple days ago i just want to elaborate more.

it makes me really just idk :/ i don’t like the community at all anymore and it’s been declining my mental for a bit. i love enha and all my people in the different groups i like, but i really really hate how some ppl write them and it just freaks me out REALLY bad. ESPECIALLY RIKI. like fuck some of you guys are so weird bruh…. and shameless. like you have no respect and don’t even on the “it’s not that serious.” you’re fucking weird. period. there’s no reason to make some of the shit you guys say public at all.

it’s been talked abt more recently how dubcon and dark fics are more common now and i can’t keep scrolling past it and seeing it. it freaks me out that people will write about actual people like that especially someone who lived at the receiving end of abuse like that. why would you want someone you love to be put in the situation of the abuser? like it doesn’t click to me and sometimes even scrolling past and seeing the tags and send me into a bad episode so i just can’t anymore. i don’t know how people think that’s okay to push their coping mechanism that’s darker and extremely damaging on an actual HUMAN BEING. coping mechanism or not that’s fucking weird. they may be idols but they are human beings too.

i’ve also had a few asks in my anon that are just straight up rude, demanding, or calling me weird for liking riki at all? like you are attacking the wrong girl i have nothing but respect for him. those anons are just stressing me out aswell and it’s just too much. i’m exhausted constantly being disrespected. tumblr is supposed to be a platform where i can get away and get lost in lighthearted stories and it’s not that for me anymore.

i might come back after i leave on valentine’s day but i need time to actually enjoy kpop like i used to. the fans are ruining it for me and it’s just been making me really depressed. i can’t even go on tiktok sometimes because of the fan bases. i’ve always been very open with you guys and like, i need to pull back from these fan bases and take care of myself. i barely eat, sleep, or enjoy anything anymore(that’s due to offline stuff but being on tumblr doesn’t help any of that at all). i miss having fun and the communities are ruining it.

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socialc1imb · 2 years ago

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Ahh!! I finally got to see all of the FF AU stuff! I have a couple questions so I hope it's not annoying 🥺 I'm just getting more and more invested haha!

1) How do you depict Green, Red and Blue to make them all slightly unique? I've noticed you draw them slightly different but also not??? And I love it!!

2) I'm kind of bad at interpreting things sometimes, but.... Is Blue using sign language? Did I miss some stuff in the tag, I was using mobile and I'm AWFUL at navigating blogs n tags on mobile so I could have missed something haha oops 😬

Anyways, I'm sorry if this is annoying osuehfhsjeh I'm genuinely excited about finding your blog, your art, and this AU! Feel free to ignore this though if you want! Or answer it later no worries ❤️

No worries, this isn’t annoying at all! I genuinely love answering questions like this :3

This’ll probs be long because im exhausted and talkative so im gonna

I depict them all kinda differently despite them all looking kinds he same! So, Green looks the most like “Link,” with the classic green tunic and white shorts n stuff, but instead if a hat he usually has a ponytail. Red has super curly hair , the hat, and a scarf (for fashion). Vio has clothes more similar to Green’s, except he gets a hat and his shorts/undershirt are darker colored, more similar to what Shadow wears in the manga. Lastly, Blue is the only one who wears pants, a long sleeved shirt, and a type of shawl/jacket and gloves (my reasoning for this is that he’s always cold thanks to being frozen for a few days). Then of course, they all have their respective elemental pendant (from Minish cap, although they arent actually the Minish cap Link, they just happen to have those pendants to help differentiate them). Of course, i have headcanons on other things such as differences in hair color and how their skin tones are all slightly different, but considering that i dont often color art anymore, im not going to get into that 💀

Yes, Blue uses sign! I’m not the greatest at drawing it, so it can be hard to tell sometimes. He’s mostly nonverbal in my au, usually opting to sign unless he a.) absolutely needs to use his voice or b.) is pissed. Sign is a lot more blunt of a language, and I think it fits his personality to prefer using it, if that makes sense? Idk if that makes sense. Whatever im exhausted

I’m really glad y’all are actually enjoying this au haha. It’s been fun doing these little drawings answering questions, and i plan to do more soon!

#asks #forgotten fourth au #ffau #loz four swords #four swords au #ffau asks

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dootiexcupcake · 2 years ago

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Final Round

First part

Second part

Pairing: Seungcheol x reader

Warnings: angst , toxic friendships , no happy ending

Tags: angst, Jeonghan comes back :D

Word count: 1.3k

A/N: this was a request for @enhacolor ! Also the final installment for this angst series :((. i dont wanna exhaust it and end up hating it so im capping it off here.

.·:¨ ✘♚✘ ¨:·.·:¨ ✘♚✘ ¨:·.·:¨ ✘♚✘ ¨:·.·:¨ ✘♚✘ ¨:·.

Two weeks. It took two weeks for you and Seungcheol to get to where you guys are right now.

Last week when you called him he finally decided to pick up and the conversation was…strained to say the least. But you kept your hopes up and had Jeonghans reassuring words playing in your head to stop you from crying on the phone with Seungcheol as he gave you curt answers to your questions.

That didn’t stop you from sobbing as soon as you hung up though.

But today is a new day, right? After your phone call with him you guys agreed to meet up at your place to talk things over officially. So that’s a good start.

You’re pacing back and forth in your living room when you hear a knock at the door.

You open the door and give Cheol a warm smile and he returns it with a tight smile. You both wordlessly make your way over to the living room and sit next to each other on the couch, giving the other ample amount of space to not cause any discomfort that could lead to another dispute.

“So,” you start “how are things?” This all feels so strange. You guys have known each other long enough to not have these sort of awkward conversations anymore.

Why am I making it so weird?

“Everything is fine.” He affirmed. It was the first word he’s spoken to you since he walked in. First time in weeks since you’ve heard his voice in person.

God…you really missed him.

“But..we should definitely talk about what happened.” His posture straightens as he starts to get more serious, finally looking at you instead of the carpet.

“Yeah. Do you wanna start?”

“No, I wanna hear you first. I didn’t hear you out last time so….I’m gonna do that now.” His tone was uncharacteristically soft, like he was trying his hardest not to upset you. It confused you but you dismissed it as him just trying to be nice.

“Oh uh well..I-I’m just hurt by what you said, you know? I mean, I understand that you have been dealing with a lot at work too! I didn’t mean to stress you out even more.” Hearing the tone of your own voice come off so small makes you squeeze your eyes shut and shake your head, mentally kicking yourself for being so unsure of everything single thing you say and do. You hate to say it but, it sounds so… childish.

‘I definitely could have worded that to sound less…pitiful.’

“No you’re right.” Seungcheol replies, he rest a hand on your shoulder to dissipate the stress building up within you. A gesture you are familiar with from him, but today it feels so very different. So foreign.

“I’m sorry for how I reacted. It was uncalled for and rude. You’re my friend and I shouldn’t ever treat you like that.” He graciously apologizes. You’re taken aback by his words, it’s not like he’s never apologized before. But the way he worded it so unnatural, his flat tone of voice, the way he was looking in your direction but never directly at you. It felt strange.

The atmosphere in the room is indescribable. You desperately want to assume Seungcheol is just acting weird because of how things went last time. It was a tense argument. One that neither of you have had with each other before. Obviously the aftershocks of it would put anyone on edge for a while.

However the other part of you feels some dishonesty emanating off of him. Why Seungcheol would supposedly lie about his apology doesn’t make sense to you. But that doesn’t ease the nagging voice in the back of your head insisting that is the truth.

“I wanna apologize to you too. When I called you cold and..distant. it really wasn’t ok for me to just come after you like that.” You look at him, you’re genuinely apologetic and you hope he can see it on you face. Seungcheol looks away from you momentarily, you see his face tense but it happens so quickly you can’t pin point exactly what emotion he expressed. He looks back at you and shrugs his shoulders and lazily shakes his head.

“I forgive you. I would have said the same thing if I was in your place.” He says, another tight smile brandishing his face.

You know Seungcheol well enough to see right through that blatant lie. This man is bold and he will always tell it like it is. You were holding back when you said that to him. He, respectfully, would not have. Instead, he would have straight up asked why you were avoiding him.

“Look, this whole situation was really messy. We’re both sorry and that’s all that matters, right?” He says matter of factly.

“I guess..”

“Right! So, let’s just put this all behind us and move on. I really missed you, you know.” Seungcheols shoulders relax and his face softens. It all looks so natural, unlike everything else he’s been doing this whole time. You furrow you eyebrows at him wondering why he was being so hasty with this conversation. “How about we meet up next week and get some lunch? Just try and get back into the swing of things so everything can get back to normal.” He suddenly proposes.

“Um yeah, I-i’ll let you know if I’m free.”

“Great!” Seunghceol practically leaps out of the couch and heads to the doorway. “See you around!”

And he’s gone.

Everything is back to normal now…

“Tell me everything he said.” Jeonghan urged on the other side of the phone. Audibly just as perplexed as you are with this whole ordeal. So you tell him everything.

You tell him how fast the conversation went by, how weird Seungcheol was acting the whole time, how dismissive he was.

“God this dude…” Jeonghan mumbled angrily, “I’m so sorry that he messed all of this up for you. That is so not ok.”

Messed this up?

“What do you mean by that Hannie?” You ask after a brief pause.

“Well, I mean by him messing things up between you guys, you know?” He said quickly. You can’t see it but by the tone of his voice, you know for a fact that he’s toying with the hem of his shirt. He always did that when he gets anxious.

“Jeonghan…” you say slowly, voice dropping dangerously low as you try to pull whatever it is he’s hiding out of him.

The line goes silent for a while.

Until he finally speaks up.

“I talked to him.”

Why did that not surprise you?

“He didn’t like you being upset at him for so long so he called me and asked me for advice on what to say to make you…get over it. That’s what he said at least. I’m not saying that you need to ‘get over it’ though!” He stammered over his words, desperately trying to justify himself. After a while of you not responding he lets out a sigh, “He’s been busy, real busy! You know that. He’s not thinking straight is all. Deep down he really does mean his apology its just..not showing yet.”

You let his words wash over you like a thunderstorm.

Too busy to properly apologize? Not thinking straight enough to care? So caught up in his work he had his buddy feed him lines to read off?

huh.

“I gotta go.” Is all you gave as a reply. Too numb to truly tell Jeonghan how much this hurt you. Too emotionally overdrawn to explain how stupid this all makes you feel.

So stupid for forgetting the fact that Jeonghan has known Seungcheol longer than you. So stupid for thinking that you were special enough to ever be accepted in their friend group.

Jeonghan speaks up again for the last time, cutting you out of your thoughts.

“I’m sorry.”

main m.list

svt m.list

#seungcheol angst #seungcheol x reader #seungcheol x you #seungcheol x y/n #seungcheol x gn reader #seventeen imagine #seventeen angst #seventeen x y/n #seventeen x you #seventeen x reader #seventeen x gn reader #svt x reader #svt x y/n #svt x you

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boston-babies · 2 years ago

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I have been scrolling past the thing I don't want to read, but that's almost everything. I know this sounds dumb because this is a fictional family, but with all the subplots, I no longer feel connected to this family and your blog.

I can't participate the way I used to because I have no clue what's going on. I feel like a useless spectator, and that's why im no longer having fun here.

Obviously, no one will miss me, but I miss the more organized blog and the interaction with the mod.

And please don't call (not you, mod but your annons) anyone with a different opinion than you stupid.

I wasn't coming after the mod. I'm just sad my favorite blog is going in a very different unorganized direction.

{I have posts tagged so you can filter anything you don’t want to see. I started this blog in 2020 to be my escape too, to be able to create this family and pour my heart and soul into it really helped me through a lot of shitty things that were happening in my life but the blog was barely interacted with and I had considered a few times just shutting it down because no one really seemed interested but something told me to just keep trying so I decided in October to open up the blog and expand the world a bit and the reaction was so heartwarmingly positive and engagement skyrocketed. But then asks like yours started coming through more and it’s been getting exhausting and frustrating because I’ve been bending over backwards to find a way to make everyone happy but no one seemed to like any alternatives that I came up with. When I ask anons like you what it is I can do to make everyone happy, I never get constructive answers. It’s just “well this has changed and now im not happy about it” instead of giving actual suggestions. So I’m sorry that the blog is “changing and is disorganized” and that you’re not happy about it anymore but I’m done. I’m going to run this blog the exact way I want to because it’s mine and until someone comes back with an idea that’ll work for everyone, please stop sending asks like this in.}

#mod barbie talks

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danganronpa-haven · 4 years ago

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Request: Mod Komaru! This is extremely self indulgent so it is a-okay to turn this down, Kaede gains a bit of weight due to her eating more reguarly, and her classmates reassure her she is still loved and valued?

Oo sure! Sadly I don’t have my reaction sprites cause I’m on my phone instead of my usual device but I hope this works! Imma do like.. a set of headcanon for each character on how they would reassure her if that works?

Kaede Gains Some Weight and her Classmates Assure her that She is Still Loved

Shuichi:

-Shumai is the type of person to like people based off of personality, looks and weight don’t matter to him :)

-So he will shyly but not too shyly reassure her that she still holds value to him and that she matters and that he cares about her a lot :)

-Shumai is a good friend ^^

Kokichi:

-this brat,,

-this ABSOLUTE brat would comfort her in the weirdest ways possible- he would probably insult her over it and then say “bUT THATS A LIE”

-he’s dumb but he’s trying?

Gonta:

-Gonta is so sweet he would do the following

-he would show her a caterpillar and then he would point out a butterfly and say “just because the caterpillar changed, doesn’t mean Gonta loves it any less!”

-he’s so sweet god damn it

Ryoma:

I am so sorry but I can’t write this guy comforting anyone for my life sorry

Miu:

I don’t write Miu sorry :(

Kaito:

-this man is SUCH an idiot

-he probably wouldn’t notice and when Kaede points it out he’s probably be like oh

-tbh that would be strangely comforting

Maki:

-Maki would notice but would not care at all

-and if Kaede were to point it out she would probably say she doesn’t care

-she doesn’t care about weight yall. Don’t worry ^^

Kirumi:

-this woman oh my god

-she would point it out and ask if Kaede wanted to go on a diet and would promise her assistance, but she would add that she cared about Kaede either way

-bless her soul ^^

Tenko:

-Tenko would only give a bleep if Kaede did as well

-and if she did, she would reassure her with everything she has! Which would involve lots of simping! You know the deal!

-and if anyone said anything rude bout it, believe me they will never see the light of day again

Himiko:

-she would use her MAAAAAGIC to help Kaede love herself

-That is it.

Tsumugi:

-she would probably have Kaede cosplay an awesome character with a similar body type to her

-and she would make sure to tell her every amazing thing she and the character have in common ^^

Korekiyo:

I cannot imagine how he would do this and the only thing that comes to mind is him doing a ritual for her to love herself soooooo

Rantaro:

-would probably just talk to her about it!

-ask her why it bothers her, and ask what she wants to do!

-he’s cool :)

Angie:

-She would probably paint Kaede to show her her beauty ^^

-and she would make it clear that Atua thinks she is beautiful as well ^^ K1B0:

-he would probably try to be the best robo-comforting-person he can be!

-He would research all the things she could do and ask her what she wants to do

-he is really nice!

I hope this fulfills your request! I just why you to know that you do matter to me no matter what you look like :)

-Mod Komaru

#Kaede Akamatsu #Akamatsu Kaede #Kaede #Akamatsu #shuichi saihara #saihara shuichi #shuichi #saihara #🤍Mod Komaru🤍#🤍Mod Komaru Writes🤍#kaito momota #momota kaito #kaito #momota #im exhausted so I’m not tagging anymore sorry :(

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seidenbros · 2 years ago

Note

Im sorry if this is too intense of a request, but I’ve been going through something lately and could use the comfort. Could you do a Eddie/fem!reader where they’re in a relationship and Eddie finds out your previous boyfriend was abusive?

Hello love! I'm really sorry to hear that, and if you ever want to talk, my inbox is always open, just so you know. If you just want to get something off your chest or want a shoulder to lean on: I'm here! That being said, I pushed this up on my to-do-list and just finished it (it's not beta'd though) So that you can hopefully get some comfort out of this and I didn't go too dark in some parts.

Requests are open | prompt lists for inspiration | Stranger Things Masterlist

Pairing: Eddie Munson x fem!Reader Word count: 2598 something Warning/Tags: angst, hurt/comfort, domestic abuse, child abuse (mentioned), scars, violence, fluff in the end, Wayne Munson being our hero again (let me know if I missed something) Read on AO3

Two months. For two months, you’d officially been Eddie’s girlfriend now, but you’d met even before that, had gotten to know each other better, before he’d made a move and asked you out on a real date. At first, you’d been a little reserved, the memories of your ex-boyfriend still very vivid in your head, and they even haunted you at night, but Eddie had been so sweet, and hadn’t given up, so you’d agreed. After all, you’d already spent your afternoons together studying.

That was how it all had started, because you’d been paired up for a project. You’d started talking about a whole lot more than just the project. While you’d gotten some mix tapes from Eddie to give a listen to, he’d gotten a book from you that he had to give a chance. Sure, you knew that nothing would live up to The Lord of the Rings, but it was still one of your favourites. In the end, you’d told him that you’d go on a date with him if he read the book. The next day, he’d stood in front of you, book in hand and had started a whole conversation about it.

“Pick you up at seven tomorrow night,” he’d said when he’d left and ever since then, you’d spent pretty much every day together, still getting to know each other better, and falling deeper in love with each other. Still, there was a lot you hadn’t told him, but Eddie was patient.

While you loved feeling his hands on your skin, you hadn’t gone any further. You always tensed up when you felt his hands closer to the clasp of your bra. Not because you didn’t want this, but because of the memories that haunted you. Eddie always picked up on it, always told you, that you didn’t need to rush anything, but you couldn’t blame him for trying.

You’d slept over at his trailer a couple of times, had slept in his arms, or had at least tried to do so, but you were always scared that you’d wake up from the nightmares. So instead you’d stayed awake most of the night, had watched him sleep peacefully. Deep down you knew that Eddie would never hurt you, but that little nagging voice in your had told you that you’d thought the same about Luke. Until he’d raised his hand for the first time, until he’d done it again and again, had treated you like you were one of his belongings, not a human being. At one point, you’d gotten out, but only because he’d found some other girl that he’d liked more. You only hoped that he wouldn’t treat her the same way he’d treated you.

Luke was your past, not your present anymore, and it was a good thing that he’d left the school last year so that you didn’t have to see him anymore. Too bad, he hadn’t taken the memories with him. The scar close to your left temple would always remind you of him anyway.

Today, you’d spent all day outside, and were absolutely exhausted when you eventually lay in bed with Eddie, his arms wrapped around your middle, holding you close to him.

“You need your sleep, sweetheart. You can hardly keep your eyes open.” Eddie smoothed a hand over your hair before he pressed his lips to your forehead.

“I’m alright,” you whispered against his chest, stifling a yawn. You knew that you needed your sleep, but you were also afraid that you’d wake up drenched in your own sweat, yelling, because that had happened before. Your Mum had been by your side in no time, but even she didn’t know what had happened with Luke. You’d told her some sorry excuse that you’d tried to skateboard, because it had looked like so much fun, but you’d fallen off. You’d had to tell her something when the hospital had called her to pick you up.

“Sure you are.” You could hear the smirk in his voice, heard some rustling, before you looked up. “Just relax and I’ll read you something, ‘kay?”

How were you supposed to say no when he was holding your favourite book, the one you’d given him, that had led up to your first real date? He wasn’t even finished with the first page when you fell asleep with your head nestled on his chest.

It didn’t take long until you heard Eddie’s soothing voice, but it still held a hint of panick.

“It’s okay, it’s me, Y/N! It’s me, it’s Eddie!”

“No, no, no, no, no!” You mumbled still half asleep when your eyes suddenly opened, because you couldn’t move your hands anymore, hands wrapped firmly around your wrists. “LUKE, NO! Let me go!” You pushed yourself away, ripped your hands free and pressed your back against the wall behind you, chest heaving because you were breathing so hard. Your eyes needed a moment to adjust to the darkness in the room. Deep down, you knew where you were, but your nightmare was still so vivid, that it was hard to really comprehend what was going on.

“It’s not Luke, it’s Eddie,” he spoke to you again, keeping his hands up so that you could see them. His voice was still steady, but he was careful not to move too quickly. “It’s okay, you’re safe here!” While he didn’t yet know what had happened to you, he had a pretty good idea what might have caused your reaction.

“Ed… Eddie?” you whispered with a trembling voice, a sob ready to break out of you any moment now, and when he really came into focus, when you realised where you were that you were really safe, the tears started flowing. Eddie didn’t know what was the right thing to do now, whether you needed him to stay away or wrap his arms around you, so he just opened his arms for you, but stayed where he was to give you some space.

“I’m right here, sweetheart. Tell me what you need!” He wanted to help you, but he didn’t know how, but he was more than relieved when you threw yourself into his arms, curled up on his lap and buried your head in the crook of his neck. Eddie gently wrapped his arms around your body, placed both of his hands on your back and rubbed them slowly up and down. He could feel your tears against his skin, and he just held you in his arms, letting you cry your heart out, because it seemed like it was just what you needed.

You had no idea how long you’d been sitting there until you were finally able to raise your head again and look at him.

“I’m so sorry…” Your voice was hoarse from sobbing, which led up to a few hiccups. Your hands came up to rub at your eyes, brush the remaining tears away, because you were slowly calming down, feeling utterly safe in Eddie’s embrace.

“You don’t have to apologise, princess.” Eddie brushed his knuckles across your cheek, let his hand drop to take ahold of yours then. “You scared me there, but I’m more worried about you than anything else.”

Your eyes landed on his chest, where you saw the damage you’d done. There were scratch marks from your fingernails that hadn’t been there when you’d gone to sleep.

“I hurt you.”

“That’s nothing, really,” he reassured you, raising your hand to kiss each knuckle, hopefully calming you down a little more. “You were whispering in your sleep and then you started yelling and flailing your arms around. I was just worried about you.”

“Still… I’m sorry about this.” You touched your fingertips to the scratches as if to soothe them. You never wanted to hurt him, but now you had, even if you hadn’t really been in control of your own body.

“No more apologies, okay?” Eddie leaned forward to brush a kiss over your nose, not really sure whether it was okay to properly kiss you right now or not. He didn’t want to overstep any boundaries and make you feel safe here with him. A nod from you made him smile again. “Do you want to talk about it?” He felt you tense up a little bit again, which made him add: “You don’t have to. Just know that I’m here to listen, alright?”

No, you didn’t want to talk about it, but you felt the need to say it out loud. You wouldn’t heal if you kept this to yourself and pulled away from Eddie. You’d realised that you loved him, but hadn’t been able to tell him that yet. You hadn’t found the courage to speak the words.

“It’s just…” you started, but needed to take a deep breath, before you kept on talking. Honestly, you didn’t even really know where to start. “My ex…”

“Luke,” Eddie provided, because he wanted you to use his name, because it was one person who’d done this to you. He didn’t yet know what exactly, but he was prepared to find out.

“Yes…” You wet your lips with your tongue, eyes firmly on his chest, because you couldn’t look him in the eyes. Your hands still in his, the one thing you were holding onto, that was grounding you somehow. “I don’t even really remember when it started, but when he didn’t like what I had to say… he raised his hand.” Another deep breath, trying to push away the memories. “And then it happened more frequently… One time he hit me again and again and I ended up in hospital. That’s how I got this scar.”

You disentangled your hand from his, pushed the hair away from your temple and showed him the fine scar. Your eyes closed, when his fingertips touched the delicate skin. In the next moment, you felt his lips there, just a soft brush, but it still managed to make your lips curl up into a smile for a moment.

“And you didn’t tell them.” It wasn’t a question, and there was no judgement in his words, it was just what happened most of the time, and he knew what he was talking about.

“I told my Mum that I tried to skateboard and fell.” Your mother had believed you, or had at least not asked any more questions, so you’d never talked about what had really happened up until now.

“Yeah, we tend to do that,” Eddie said softly, which got your attention.

“We?”

Now, it was Eddie’s turn to sigh. He took your right hand and guided it through his hair to the back of his head, where you could feel a small scar, your fingers gently stroking over the skin.

“There were multiple reasons why I ended up living with my uncle. That’s one of them.” It hadn’t been the first time it had happened, but the last, because as soon as Wayne had found out, he’d taken the steps to get Eddie to live with him.

“Oh Eddie…” Cradling his face in your hands, you captured his lips in a soft kiss. Thinking about little Eddie going through this… it broke your heart, but it made you appreciate everything Wayne did and had done even more. He was a saint, really.

“It’s been years, but I’ve had nightmares as well.”

“How… did you deal with it?” you asked quietly, leaning your forehead against his, closing your eyes. Your hands dropped to his chest, feeling his heart beat beneath them, reassuring you that he was here, that this was real and everything else had really just been a nightmare.

“I talked about it.” Eddie put his hands on your waist to pull you close again. “I know how that sounds, and I didn’t open up at first as well, but Wayne was always there, listening, and once I talked about it with him, the nightmares ceased.” His thumbs brushed over your waist, before he pushed them to your back, rubbing soothing circles all over it. “They come back occasionally, but they are not as terrible anymore.” “What’s changed?”

“I’ve got people in my life that love me… and that I love.” Eddie brushed your nose with his making you look into his eyes. “People I trust.” His lips ghosted over yours before he pulled back slightly to look at you.

“I do trust you.” Your voice was soft, quiet, but he heard every word, and it filled him with pride. “And I… And I love you.” There, the words you’d been too afraid to speak were out now, but after tonight, after you’d finally been able to talk about what had happened, you felt so relieved that you had to tell him.

“If that wasn’t clear before, I love you, too. You belong to these people that make my life a whole lot better.” Eddie leaned down and kissed you. A proper kiss this time that lingered, that touched your soul and made you crave even more.

“I should have told you sooner.”

“No.” Eddie quickly shook his head and sat up a little more. “You needed your time, and that’s perfectly fine. Just know that I’ll always be right here to listen, sweetheart. Whenever you need me, I’ll be there.”

“Stop, or you’ll make my cry again!”

“As long as you’re not crying in pain or fear… it’s a good sign, right?”

“Yeah, probably,” you had to admit as you wrapped your arms around his neck and pulled him close again, connecting your lips with his in a sweet kiss. For a moment, you stayed just like this.

“I just have one question,” Eddie broke the silence, framing your face with his hands again so that he could look in your eyes. “That no good bastard… where is he?”

“Not in Hawkins anymore. He graduated last year and left the town as quickly as possible.”

“Good.” “Why you asking?”

“Just thought I’d give him a piece of mind, defend your honour and shit.” Eddie grinned at you, gave your waist a gentle squeeze.

“You’re an idiot,” you said with a laugh, shaking your head. It was the sweetest and at the same time the dumbest thing he’d ever told you, because you really didn’t want him anywhere near Luke, because he’d only get into trouble. But that he wanted to defend your honour was something right out of a book or a movie, and so sweet, you simply had to kiss him.

“Yeah, your idiot, don’t forget that!” he whispered against your lips, before he sealed them with his again.

No, no that was something you definitely wouldn’t forget. He was yours and you were his in the best way possible.

“How about you get some sleep now? You must be exhausted.”

“Yeah… I am.” The nightmare had been draining enough, talking about it had done the rest, but at least, you were feeling a lot more relaxed now, relieved even. “What about you?”

“Oh, I’ll just watch over you for a bit until I’m sure that you’re sound asleep and no nightmares will haunt you for the rest of the night.”

You had no idea how he wanted to achieve that, because he couldn’t control what you were dreaming, but it worked. No more nightmares woke you that night, and ever since opening up to Eddie, the nightmares were becoming less and less. You’d always carry the scars on your body and soul, but now you had someone who understood you, someone you trusted, and someone who’d do anything to protect you.

Tag-list: @violetpenguinkris @tellhound @ghosttownwherenoonegoes @spideyanakin-interacts @bellamy-barnes @beepisbeep @snapefiction @hardysbitch

Let me know if you want to be tagged for this series, or Eddie stuff in general 💚

#eddie munson x reader #eddie x reader #eddie munson x you #eddie munson imagine #eddie munson fanfiction #stranger things x reader #stranger things #stranger things season 4 #stranger things imagine #eddie munson angst #eddie munson hurt/comfort #staffi writes #anon request

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hanbxnn · 2 years ago

Note

Omg first request so i’m kinda nervous :> Could you write something about mammon and readers first date?

best worst date

paring: mammon x gn!reader tags: fluff, established relationship, first dates, kisses <3, i fucking love this man notes: IM SOOO SORRY FOR THE LATE POSTTT esp since it's your first req :cc i really enjoyed this so i hope you enjoyed it too anon– my inbox is always open for you

mammon had every single part of the day planned to the absolute second but obviously, everything that can go wrong, does go wrong.

his alarm never rang.

his bed hair wouldn't settle.

he couldn't remember the last place where he placed his rings.

then when he finally managed to leave the house with you, his hands wouldn't stop sweating so he was constantly wiping them against his pants.

seeing you all dressed up next to him with such an adorable anticipating gaze, made mammon's heart thump against his chest.

he had every intention of making this the best day you've ever experienced in your life but he was sure he was going to need to stop by the clothing store if he sweated anymore through his shirt.

sensing his nervousness, you chuckled endearingly, taking a hold of his hand before he could retaliate, pulling him along with the excuse that he was going to make you guys late to the movies.

"i swear i- i had it when i left the house-"

mammon patted every pocket he had on his body, feeling for his wallet that he was certain he shoved somewhere.

"j- just one moment, it's here! i swea–"

his words were cut off when your lips touches his cheek in a quick kiss, taking advantage of his shocked state, you quickly pulled out your credit card for the cashier. taking the drinks and passing them to mammon so you could hold onto to the popcorn and tickets.

"come on, babe! we're in screen four, we should be in time for the trailers." you flashed him a smile as you nudged him towards the general direction.

mammon found himself speechless as he was pushed toward the ticket master, all the way up until the two of you sat down in your allotted seats.

mammon had researched all the hottest movies that were playing in the cinemas in advance, picking a general romcom that received the highest praises from critics.

what he didn't account for was how easily susceptible he was to tearjerkers.

by the end of the movie, he was a sobbing mess. eyes red and puffy with his nose raw from how much he was rubbing them.

you were gentle as you wiped away his tears, letting him bury his head into the crook of your neck as he cried out the last of his emotions, soothed by your soft coos and occasional kisses you left to the side of his face.

just as he had finished calming down, blushing in embarrassment as he tries to wipe away the wetness of his tears that stained your neck. though you didn't seem to be bothered by it at all, instead you pulled out a tissue and began to dab away at his snotty nose with a warm smile.

"hungry?"

and like clockwork, mammon stomach growled as a response to your question. his face heated, tipping down to hide his expression as he quickly pulled you along, headed to one of your favorite restaurants.

you chuckled as you trailed behind him, giving his hand a soft squeeze while you rubbed your thumb comfortingly over his knuckles.

dinner doesn't go exactly as planned either.

the supposedly romantic candlelight dinner was just so conveniently happened to be on the same day as a large family gathering a couple tables down, filling the normally quiet restaurant with loud cheers and an endless continuation of the birthday song.

by the end of the night, mammon was exhausted mentally and physically.

his pout was prominent as he walks you just outside of your bedroom.

"i'm sorry for the horrible date, yer must hate me and never wanna go out with me ever again." he mumbles as he reluctantly lets go of your hand.

his eyes widen when you snatch it back up just as quickly, mammon was taken aback by how your expression showed as if you had just heard the most offensive thing in the world.

"mammon, stop being so silly. i had so much fun today! i'm so happy you took me out on a date today, i'm really grateful for everything you did, thank you."

your hands were gentle as you reached up to cup his cheeks, flashing him a bright smile before inching up to leave a chaste kiss against his lips.

mammon gaped at you from how you seemed to be so content and full of sincerity.

"i don't really want this day to end, do you wanna sleep over tonight?" you glanced up shyly to gauge his response. the mammon that seemed so down not a moment ago felt like his spirit completely revived in an instant.

his eyes sparkled as he nodded his head frantically, there was no need for him to even go back to his room to prepare because the majority of his belongings were already scattered around your room.

mammon mood brightens up the more he hears his favorite sound of your laughter.

as the both of you settled down, with you all snuggled up in his arm, his heart blooms with every word of your retelling of every moment that had enjoyed while you were with him.

as he listens intently to the way your voice lightly trails off, your soft breaths filling up the silence of the room. mammon smiles lovingly as he adjusts the blanket around your shoulders before dropping a long kiss to the crown of your head.

"thank you for giving me the best day ever, i love so you."

no matter how bad everything seemed to go against him, mammon felt like he could overcome anything with you by his side.

#obey me #obey me fluff #mammon x reader #mammon x you #mammon x y/n #anon request #anon #ky's delusions

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butterflyyeo · 3 years ago

Text

drunk in love

pairing - yeosang x fem reader

genre - fluff, angst (?)

tw - lots of alcohol consumption, swearing

wc - 10k

side ships - seongjoong, yungi

a/n -- was meant to be angst but turned into fluff... im trying my best to get better at writing angst aaaah. but please enjoy this for now <3 thanks for letting me tag you @iminchaosnow !!

------------------------------------------- you had known kang yeosang for nearly two years now. two, dreadfully slow and exhausting years.it was your final year of high school when he transferred to your school, he was a close family friend of wooyoung's. his parents had spoken highly of the school, insisting that yeosang transfers in order to excel for his last year of schooling. as far as you were concerned, he had decent grades, but he preferred to spend his time hanging around the skatepark after dark, when everyone else had left.

and in all the two years you'd known him, you had never once had a full conversation with him, despite being in your group of friends. his side of the 'conversation' usually consisted of monotonous 'yeahs' and 'mhms'. wooyoung constantly assured you it was because he's shy and that he'd eventually open up. but you weren't convinced. you tried so hard for him to like you, but your efforts were fruitless. it was infuriating, feeling like you were constantly doing something wrong whenever you were around him.

you currently found yourself in the backseat of yeosang's car, wedged between a drunken yunho and mingi while a chaotic wooyoung was singing along to his chosen playlist. (though, it sounded more like wailing.)

you and the eight boys had all decided to take a gap year, spend every last cent you earned on adventure and alcohol to make lifelong memories, before your careers became a blockade in your friendship. but the year was coming to an end soon, it was already mid november. on the bright side, that meant your favourite holidays were just weeks away.

yeosang was always the designated driver. that was something you had noticed about him over the last few years. to be honest, you weren't sure just how he coped with a screeching wooyoung, because you sure as hell weren't dealing very well with yunho and mingi who were playing a very intense game of rock paper scissors to decide who would be crashing on the couch in your apartment.

"i win!" mingi cheered, waving his hands excitedly. "you're on the couch, man."

yunho frowned, "damn."

you laughed, "it's okay, yunho. you can share the bed with me if you'd like."

"hey! that's not fair y/n! you said i could this time." wooyoung whined from the front seat.

"sorry, woo. you know i keep my promises, but you're going back to your apartment. remember?" you tried to reason.

wooyoung looked as though someone had switched a lightbulb on behind his eyes, "oh yeah! i forgot."

the four of you burst into laughter, mainly caused by the alcohol and partially because of wooyoung's realisation. and still, yeosang didn't crack a smile, hands just gripping the steering wheel tighter as his knuckles turned white.

soon, you arrived outside your apartment block, quickly stepping out the car after yunho. wooyoung wound his window down and you poked your head in, attempting to hug him goodbye.

"bye woo!" you said, giggling at your faltered farewell.

"good night y/n, thanks for the drinks!" he shouted, exclaiming a bit too loudly next to your ear.

"thanks for the lift as always, yeosang!" you yelled, pulling away from wooyoung's tight hug.

he nodded, "no problem." before putting the window up and driving away.

you pouted, turning around to face the two boys. "i just don't understand what i'm doing wrong." you buried your face into your hands, "why doesn't he like me?" you groaned.

"y/n." mingi began, "its nearly 1am, its way too late for this 'why does yeosang hate me?' crap." he shook your shoulders, literally trying to shake some sense into you.

"yeah, mingi's right. we've had this discussion a thousand times." yunho said grasping your wrist and pulling you up the stairs, stumbling along the way. (because lets be real, stairs are difficult enough as it is, let alone when drunk.) "now, let us into your apartment so we can eat your food and crash on your couch!" he joked, nudging mingi in a playful manner.

you reached into your pocket and fumbled around with they key for a moment before unlocking the door. the boys practically pushed you inside and made a beeline for the fridge.

"help yourselves! i'm going to shower." you called, dragging yourself to your bedroom.

once you'd finished showering you went back to the living room to check on yunho and mingi. not so much to your surprise, they had fallen asleep on your couch already, cuddled up into each other. it was cute, even picture worthy to show their sober selves. you reached for your phone which typically lived in your pocket, though you began to panic when it wasn't there. hurrying around the apartment, you searched every possible nook and cranny for your phone, but it was nowhere to be found. you collapsed onto your bed, snuggling into the soft sheets, too tired to worry about your phone anymore and content with the assumption that you'd left it in yeosang's car.

shortly, your heavy eyes fell shut and you began to sleep away the tequila.

————————

the next morning you awoke to mingi and yunho's deep, hungover voices, discussing their plans for the next week.

you reluctantly pulled yourself out of bed and dawdled down the hallway.

"ah! there's our favourite karaoke partner!" yunho greeted, jokingly.

you laughed, "shh, don't let wooyoung hear you say that."

"she's right, man. he'd be so offended." mingi said, stretching out his sore limbs. "how are you feeling today, y/n?" he asked.

"not the worst hangover i've had. what about you guys? you're welcome to stay here as long as you'd like, until you feel better." you replied, knowing them well enough to know that they'd need at least a few painkillers and a good meal before they went home.

yunho chuckled, "i feel like crap, but nothing a sandwich and glass of water can't solve."

"i second that." mingi said, raising a hand.

"okay, well in that case, i'll go to the store and get something for breakfast. sound good?" you reasoned, running a hand through your hair. you loved these boys, and making them breakfast was just a nice way of showing you cared. drunk or not, they knew how to make you smile and laugh, which they loved to see.

"sounds amazing!" yunho said, breaking into a sincere smile.

you quickly changed out of your pyjamas and slipped some shoes on.

"i might be a bit longer, i need to stop by yeosang's. i think i left my phone in his car." you explained, picking your keys up from the kitchen counter. "see you guys soon! feel free to take a shower if you want." you said, waving goodbye and heading out the door.

"okay, bye y/n!" the boys called from behind you.

the first stop was yeosang's apartment, he only lived about ten minutes away with wooyoung and san, in the same building as jongho. both yunho and mingi lived on the other side of town, which is why they so often crashed at your place after parties. seonghwa and hongjoong were fortunate enough to live in a house, just outside town, they had actually been the hosts of last night's party.

it didn't take long to get there. you pushed open the lobby door and made your way over to the elevator, disappointed to see that it was out of order for maintenance. instead, you took the stairs and began spiralling upwards. less than a minute later you looked up, only to bump into the man you came looking for.

"oh, yeosang! i'm so sorry, i didn't mean to." you quickly apologised, worried about creating another reason for him to dislike you.

"it's fine." he shrugged.

you both began to talk again at the same time, "ah, sorry, you go."

"i was just gonna say, you left your phone in my car. actually, i was about to bring it back." he pulled your phone from the pocket of his jacket, handing it to you. as he did, your fingers brushed against his. he spun around suddenly and began to walk away, "i'll see you around."

he had left before you even had a chance to thank him. slightly confused and frustrated, you turned back around and traipsed down the stairs.

you gathered what you needed for a hearty breakfast at the local convenience store before heading home and spending the rest of the day in the enjoyable company of yunho and mingi.

yeosang had entered back into his apartment and sat down on the couch.

"back already?" wooyoung asked, rummaging through the fridge.

"she was coming to get her phone and i ran into her on the staircase."

wooyoung sighed, "when are you gonna stop hating her?"

"i don't hate her." yeosang said, not looking up from his phone.

"then why do you act like you do?"

yeosang pretended to not hear that question and continued to scroll through his phone. see, he'd rather not dwell on things that he couldn't understand.

————————

to fill up your weekdays during your gap year, you had picked up a job at a hotel in town as a receptionist. to your dismay, your boss had asked you to work night shift all week, which is how you found yourself here on thursday night, sitting alert and waiting for the slight chance that someone might check in at this time of night. it was a pretty fancy hotel, and the job payed well enough, so really, you had nothing to complain about.

the nights seemed to drag on for an eternity. to keep yourself busy, you often wasted time counting the cars that drove past, or tried to count the number of crystals that hung from the chandelier. so far, only a few people had checked in during your shift, having come from overseas and recently arriving at the airport. honestly, whenever someone walked through the front door, lugging a suitcase behind them, you got excited as it gave you something to do.

the clock was creeping up to 4am and you let out a quiet yawn, feeling drowsy as your body clock hadn't yet adjusted to the change of sleeping patterns on such short notice. taking a sip of water, you shook your head, trying to stay awake. your head suddenly jolted up at the sound of the front door opening.

a man stumbled forward, and you'd seen enough zombie movies to become instantly paranoid. you quickly pushed the thought out of your head, feeling ridiculous for even considering it. but as the man got closer, you could smell the cheap, potent alcohol lingering on his body.

he leant against the desk, peering down at you. "i need a room for the night." he grumbled. "my stupid wife kicked me out." he said under his breath.

you forced a friendly smile, despite feeling uneasy, "of course! i just need you to fill in this form with some simple details." you said, sliding across a clipboard and a pen.

he huffed, picking up the pen and scribbling onto the sheet of paper before pushing it back to you. "can i go now?"

"just a moment, sir." you replied, eyes skimming over the form as you copied the information into the computer in front of you.

the man was growing impatient, stepping from foot to foot with his arms crossed.

"uh, sir, you missed a part of the form. could you please provide your phone number here." you pointed to the empty space on the sheet.

"for fucks sake." he muttered, "i don't have my phone on me and i don't know my phone number." he said, annoyedly tapping on the desk.

"i'm really sorry, sir, but—"

"can't you just find me a fucking room?" he snapped, hands balled into fists and slamming against the desk, making you jump in fright.

before you had time to try and reason with him, he continued to shout.

"you're as stupid as my wife! i'll just find a different fucking hotel." he yelled, swiping the clipboard and pen off the desk. "useless bitch." he mumbled as he kicked over a chair on his way out.

you chewed your bottom lip, trying to fight back the tears. with shaky hands, you picked up your phone and dialled the first place that came to mind. after a few rings, the phone answered.

"woo?" you croaked, trying hard to not cry.

"he's asleep. this is yeosang." he replied, evidently having just woken up by the sound of his voice.

"oh." you began, instantly feeling guilty for waking him up, "i'm sorry i didn't mean to disturb you."

"did you need something?" he asked.

"i just, i was..." you let out a sob, wiping at a tear falling from your eye.

this didn't go unnoticed by yeosang, "are you crying? what are you doing awake right now anyway?"

"i'm at work." you managed to choke out.

"at 4am?"

"i'm on night shift."

"why are you crying then?" he asked, feeling something slightly tug at his heart, but choosing to ignore it.

you began to ramble, "a man came in and he was really drunk and complaining about his wife and then he yelled at me because i asked him to give his phone number and—"

"i'm on my way." yeosang cut you off.

"what?"

"i'll be there in ten." with that, he hung up the phone.

exactly ten minutes later, you were sat in the passenger seat of yeosang's car. he was dressed in sweats, clearly having come straight from bed. you'd left a note on the desk, explaining to your coworker why you wouldn't be there when she arrived to take over your shift. a silence filled the car, and you felt the need to talk, but chose not to, worried about giving yeosang another reason to hate you.

once you arrived outside your apartment building, you were surprised that yeosang got out the car too and trailed closely behind you up the stairs to your apartment. when you reached the door you spun around to face him.

"thank you for bringing me home." you said, voice quiet and still rather shaken up.

"it's no problem. good night, y/n." he replied, sensing that you were still upset. he suddenly felt this overwhelming urge to wrap his arms around you tightly and not let go until you stopped crying. he wanted to protect you from every drunk idiot on the planet. he wanted to make you feel safe.

but instead, he watched as you closed the door behind you and locked it from inside.

————————

you arrived at work the next morning, instantly feeling more comfortable with cleaners, employees and people coming and going. immediately, you headed for your boss's office.

"good morning, sir. i just wanted to come and apologise for leaving my shift early last night. i can assure you it won't happen again." you said, feeling nervous as to what your boss might say.

he shook his head, "i should be the one apologising, a man came in this morning and spoke very sternly about the safety problems here. i realise now how stupid it was of me to make you work night shift, alone, at such a young age. we've hired security guards and have also made sure that two people will be on desk at all times. i'm sorry that you had to deal with that."

you were at a loss for words, you didn't think that there would be such drastic changes just from the once incident. "thank you so much." you replied.

"for now, take the rest of the day off. you'll only be working day shifts for next week and can return to doing night shifts whenever you feel ready to do so." your boss said, motioning for the door.

the rest of the day you spent in deep sleep, catching up on some much overdue rest.

———————

weeks passed and you found that work was much more enjoyable. you still hadn't returned to working night shifts, but at least now you had someone to run the front desk with you and keep you company.

this weekend, you were going to visit hongjoong and seonghwa. hongjoong was sick and so you decided to go help out since seonghwa couldn't always be there to look after him.

you knocked on their front door and was surprised to be greeted by san.

"good afternoon! come in." he gave you a hug before ushering you inside.

"what are you doing here?" you said, following him down the hall.

in the living room, you saw all eight of the boys gathered around a couch-ridden hongjoong.

"jongho was already here when me, yeosang and woo arrived." san explained.

"yeah, and then mingi and yunho turned up." wooyoung continued.

"y/n! i have never been more glad to see you! you gotta save me from them." hongjoong laughed, arms open, signalling for a hug.

you went over and embraced him in a hug, "good thing i brought an excessive amount of cookies." you said, placing the box of cookies on the coffee table next to the couch. the table was covered in empty mugs and bowls, you could tell seonghwa had been busy and hadn't had the chance to clean up. you opened up the box and handed him a cookie before offering them around to the rest of the boys.

"you're the best cook ever." mingi said, taking a big bite.

"i made you spaghetti last night!" yunho countered, feeling offended that his roommate didn't think he was the better cook. mingi just laughed and took another bite.

"jongho get off the counter, please." seonghwa said, coming through the front door. "don't be so comfortable, you were throwing up in my toilet like a month ago." he joked.

yeosang glanced your way, his eyebrows furrowed like he was contemplating something.

"lets head off and give these two some space." yunho said, dragging mingi behind him.

wooyoung stood up, "yeah, lets get going."

yeosang pulled his keys from his pocket, "okay, bye guys." he said, heading down the hallway.

"can we get some food on the way home?" you heard san call as they left.

"bye hongjoong! i hope you're feeling better soon." jongho said, "bye seonghwa, i promise i won't throw up in your toilet any time soon." he joked, leaving through the front door.

"seonghwa, how are you? don't forget to take some time for yourself as well." you frowned.

"i'm tired, but i'll be okay. i just gotta clean up and—"

"why don't you go rest a while? i can keep hongjoong company for a few hours." you reasoned, wanting to help as much as possible. there was nothing you hated more than seeing you friends in distress and upset.

he looked between hongjoong and yourself, "i couldn't."

hongjoong let out an audible huff, "hwa! will you just let her help please, she clearly wants to."

you grinned, "exactly, now go read or sleep or watch some tv or something." you said, gently pushing him towards their shared bedroom.

you spent the afternoon tidying up and talking with hongjoong. you managed to do all the dishes and put them away before scouring their kitchen, deciding on what you could use for dinner. you found everything you needed for a decent meal and began cooking it up. hongjoong had dozed off mid conversation, surrounded in a pile of tissues, you chose to let him sleep so he would recover quicker.

about an hour later, you placed two steamy hot meals onto their dining table next to two full glasses of water. you quietly knocked on their bedroom door, finding seonghwa asleep amongst the covers.

you gently shook him awake, "hwa, i made dinner for you guys. you can wake joong up, i'll head off now." you said with a smile.

leaving the two of them to enjoy their dinner, you headed home and cooked yourself something to eat. it was nice having some time to yourself, but saturday nights were becoming more and more empty as winter grew closer. december was only days away and the year would soon come to an end. you reached for the phone, suddenly desperately missing your friends despite only seeing them hours ago.

"hey woo, are you free next weekend?" you asked.

he paused a moment, "i think so, why?"

"you wanna go out with the others? it's been a while since we have all caught up for drinks."

"count me in!" wooyoung cheered.

you called everyone else up and they all agreed, even hongjoong promised to come if he was feeling better.

————————

you found yourself surrounded by wooyoung, san, yunho and mingi as the music blared. it was a less popular club on the far side of town but it was a comfortable place for you all. you often came here for drinks and the staff members knew you, quite well, a little too well. san grabbed your hand and spun you around a few times with the music.

you laughed, leaning against him, "maybe spinning around isn't the best idea right after two shots of vodka."

"what?" san yelled into your ear, struggling to hear you over the music.

you laughed louder, pulling him closer to you, "i said, spinning is not a good idea after drinking vodka!"

"oh!" he joined you in laughing before trying to twirl you around once more.

hongjoong and seonghwa sat at the bar, holding hands and being intimate as always. yeosang was sat next to jongho at a booth, quietly talking with him, but from the corner of your eye, you saw jongho stand up and walk away. your eyes watched him worriedly and you couldn't help but run after him. you followed him as best you could, stumbling every now and then. he'd gone to the bathroom so you patiently waited outside until he came back, looking slightly pale.

you practically leapt at him, doing a quick scan to make sure he was okay, "jongho? are you alright?"

he smiled at your overwhelming concern, "yeah, i just drank too much as usual. i'll be alright, you can go back to dancing."

"let me just get you some water first. i'll be right back okay?" you patted his shoulder. "don't go anywhere i'll be back in a second."

you made your way back to where jongho had been sitting with yeosang. as you approached, yeosang eyed you up and down, taking in your drunken state, though, it wasn't the first time he'd seen you this way. you nearly tripped as you reached the table, struggling to walk in heels.

"i need a glass of water, do you have a glass of water? jongho needs a glass of water." you mumbled to yourself, reaching for the jug in the center of the table.

"are you okay?" yeosang asked, quickly pushing your hand away from the jug.

"i'm okay, but jongho needs water. can i take this cup? he's waiting for me, i told him not to go anywhere, i need to get back to jongho—" you tried to pick up a glass but yeosang pressed your hand back down once more.

"i'll take it to him, you stay here." he said, filling the cup full with water and heading towards the bathrooms.

your brain suddenly felt fuzzy and your eyes became blurry, it was like the alcohol hit your system all at once. your head spun round and round and you leaned forward, resting your hands on your head. you'd never felt this sick from drinking, maybe you'd had too much too quickly, maybe it was the spinning. there was no way to tell, all you knew was that you felt like you were about to fall from the top of a very high roller coaster.

your eyes felt increasingly heavy, you allowed them to slip shut, head falling to the table with a not so gentle thud.

"y/n?" someone shook you, "y/n wake up!" it was wooyoung.

"shit, is she okay? should we call an ambulance?" jongho said, reaching for his phone.

"is she breathing? has anyone checked?" seonghwa gently lifted your shoulders and sat you upright, relieved to see the rise and fall of your chest. "we should call a taxi and get her home."

"are you crazy? she's unconscious, she won't be able to get up the stairs to her apartment! what if the driver is dodgy? she's already had to deal with shitty men while working night shift, imagine if something happened while she's drunk!" yeosang blurted out. the boys were shocked over his sudden concern for you. yeosang had never once shown any interest or care for you in the presence of them.

"well, what should we do then?" mingi asked, worriedly running a hand through his hair.

"i'll take her, you've all been drinking." yeosang concluded. "she'll be fine, don't worry. enjoy the rest of your night, okay? i've dealt with woo passing out before remember?"

"that's true." san said, throwing a light hearted glare in wooyoung's direction, who showed a rather sheepish expression.

the boys went back to their drinks, taking it a little slower now and yeosang carried you to his car. it wasn't easy, but he managed to sit you upright in the back seat of his car with his rear view mirror aimed directly at you so he could make sure you were okay.

he was able to lift you up the stairs and get your house key from the pocket of your jacket, which would've looked questionable to anyone else, but he had the best intentions. he sat you down in a dining chair, watching as your head lolled forward and your body slumped. he quickly filled a glass of water and came back to you.

"y/n." he whispered, resting a hand on your shoulder. "y/n." he said again, louder this time.

the last thing he wanted to do was hurt you, but you weren't waking up and that was becoming concerning. he shook your shoulder, as gently as he possible could in a moment like this, and to his relief, your eyes hesitantly opened.

your head felt like a bowling ball and you groaned quietly. "yeosang?"

"here." he said holding the cup to your lips, allowing you to take a small sip.

"how did we get here?" you mumbled, head rolling to the side.

he caught your head and carefully pushed you back upright, "i drove you, this is your apartment."

"oh." you said, eyes drooping shut again. "oh." you repeated.

"y/n, i really need you to stay awake right now." he said, bringing the cup to your mouth again. "lets talk."

"we never talk!" you exclaimed. "this is the longest conversation we've ever had!"

"i know." he said, pulling up a chair to sit directly in front of you. yeosang felt that slight tug at his heart again tonight, the way you sounded so excited just to talk with him.

"no, no, no." you whined, "this is so bad!"

"what is it?"

you pouted before nervously biting your lip, "i'm really sorry."

"for what?" he questioned, leaning back in his chair.

"for ruining your night and making you stay here with me! now you just have another reason to hate me." you sighed, letting your head fall into your hands.

"i could never hate you." he said, voice barely above a whisper.

but you had fallen back asleep, so yeosang sat you upright once more and monitored you closely all night. with every minute that passed, he wished more and more that it was easier for him to show his emotions, to you especially. he wondered if maybe he wasn't so closed off that things would be different between the two of you. but it was hard for him, to let people in, he was afraid. afraid of people judging the real him, afraid of what might happen if he lets himself become vulnerable, afraid of facing his feelings about you.

you awoke hours later with a raging headache and extreme nausea. you headed straight for the bathroom and hunched over the toilet, feeling the sickest you'd ever felt. yeosang waited patiently outside the bathroom door with a glass of water and painkillers.

when you came out, he held his hand out, "take this."

you looked down at his hand and then up at him, slightly confused, "what are you doing here?"

"you passed out last night, and i drove you home because everyone else had been drinking." he said, passing the glass of water.

"oh my god." you ran a hand through your hair, "yeosang, i'm so sorry. i didn't mean to be any trouble! you must of been here all night, i promise it won't happen again, that was so stupid of me—"

"it's fine, don't worry about it." he said, shrugging, "i'll get going now, but make sure you take it easy and drink enough water." his eyes carefully scanned your body one last time, making sure you were really okay. he headed for the door and you followed.

"i'm really sorry." you frowned, feeling as though no amount of apologies would make it up to him.

he let out a slight chuckle, "it's okay, seriously y/n." he said before leaving. you heard the all too familiar jingle of his keys as the door closed behind him.

he'd stayed with you all night, eyes watching over you closely. ready at your side whenever you stirred in your sleep. he'd been there in the morning prepared with water and painkillers. this was never how it was, usually this was your job, taking care of the boys. it was your way of showing you cared, helping out wherever possible.

this wasn't like yeosang. at all.

————————

as soon as yeosang got home he was greeted by a very concerned san and wooyoung.

"is she okay?"

"are you tired?"

"did she wake up?"

he was bombarded by questions.

"she's okay, she fell asleep after a while and i made her take some painkillers when she woke up." yeosang said, collapsing onto the couch.

"so you really don't hate her then." wooyoung thought aloud.

"he can't, he spent the whole night looking after her!" san said, hitting wooyoung like it was obvious.

"owww," wooyoung rubbed his arm, "even she thinks you don't like her!"

"i know, she said last night. but she probably won't remember saying that." yeosang said, feeling increasingly drowsy from his lack of sleep.

"maybe you guys should like, talk things out?" san suggested, taking a seat next to him.

"maybe." yeosang said, drifting off into sleep.

you had spent the day curled up in bed, wondering how you could make it up to yeosang, and there was nothing more you wanted than to get to know him better, but what would he want? you called up san on that thought.

"hey sannie," you said, "i need your help, actually, is woo there as well?"

"oh my god she's alive!" you heard wooyoung call from beside san.

"what do you need help with?" san asked.

you paused a moment, "is yeosang there?"

"well yes, but he's asleep."

you groaned, "i feel so bad that he stayed up all night looking after me. i really wanna make it up to him but i don't know how. plus, it's not like he's that fond of me. maybe i should just thank him by staying out of his space."

"i don't think he'd like that." wooyoung interjected. "i still think he just needs time before opening up to you."

"i think its just me." you sighed, worriedly chewing on your bottom lip.

"hey! don't be like that! there's no reason to not like you." san scolded you for down talking yourself as he always does.

"agreed." wooyoung said, chiming in.

"i'm sure i'll work something out. thanks guys! enjoy the rest of your day!" you said.

"good luck!"

"bye y/n!"

————————

you had been staring at your phone for at least an hour, typing and retyping the message to yeosang. wooyoung gave you his number so that you could contact him when you'd finally worked out how to make it up to him. in the end, you decided that you would let him decide.

you drew in a sharp breath and squeezed your eyes tightly shut as you pressed send.

you: hey yeosang, i still feel really bad about the other day, i wanna know how i can make it up to you !!

yeosang: did wooyoung give you my number? T~T

you: yes he did.. i hope thats okay !

yeosang: of course yeosang: how about you make it up to me over a cup of coffee? >.<

you: that sounds great !! you: when are you free ?

yeosang: does tomorrow morning work for you ? i can pick you up ^_^

you: of course ! i'll see you tomorrow :)

yeosang sat in his room, facepalming. why was it so easy to be more open over text?

you on the other hand, felt your heart swell in a bizarre way. maybe it was the way you hadn't expected him to use such cute little emoticons. maybe it was the way that you'd be able to have a full conversation with him. whatever it was, excitement had taken over you.

————————

a knock pounded at your door and you rushed to open it.

"ready to go?" he asked, leaning against the door frame coolly.

"yes, lets go!" you said, sounding a little too excited.

the two of you made your way down the stairs and into yeosang's car. you found yourself smiling as you looked out the window.

your excitement hadn't gone unnoticed, "you seem awfully excited."

"i really wanted to make it up to you," you beamed. "it must've been boring to watch over me all night."

"i didn't mind so much." he said, shrugging.

you frowned, "you shouldn't of done it."

"and leave you passed out in the club?" he quirked an eyebrow up at you.

"well..."

"exactly." he said, parking the car outside a small cafe nearby his apartment. "come on, lets go inside."

you followed him in and took a seat across from him at a table close to the window. you both ordered coffees and resumed conversation.

"so, where were we?" you smiled, taking a sip of coffee.

"talking about how you wanted me to leave you passed out in the club." he said. you were almost convinced you saw a teasing smile pulling at his lips.

"right. i'm so sorry about that."

this time he actually chuckled, and you were taken aback. it was like the wall yeosang had surrounding himself was crumbling before your eyes.

"you need to apologise less." he laughed, bringing his coffee cup to his mouth for a sip. "half of the time we talk its just you saying sorry to me."

"i'm so—"

"hey!" the two of you broke into laughter.

his laugh was loud but warm and you couldn't help but notice the way his nose scrunched up cutely, the way his eyes looked full of stars and the way he brushed his hair out of his eyes after, revealing his beautiful birthmark. from that point on, you wanted to be the one to make him laugh every day.

he felt that familiar tug at his heart, the one he'd been feeling every moment he spent alone with you. the one he felt when he first met you. the one he couldn't make any sense of. it was as though his heart was a violin and you were the one playing it. (which would explain the tugging feeling.) but you were playing the sweetest song and he never wanted it to end.

the two of you laughed the morning away, gradually making up for what you'd missed over two years in a matter of two hours.

you'd discovered that even after getting him to open up more, he wasn't one for words. you found yourself talking his ear off while he listened intently, occasionally sharing his opinions and stories. in all his honesty, he didn't mind listening to you talk. he could've sat there all day, drinking countless cups of coffee, watching the way you bit your bottom lip whenever you paused to think or the way your eyes filled with sparkles when you talked about something that made you happy.

you insisted on paying for the infinite cups of coffee, as it was your way of making it up to him. he reluctantly agreed, but promised that he would pay if there ever was a next time, which he secretly hoped there would be. he'd finally had the chance to let his walls down. (it was actually more like you'd climbed the walls and torn them down with your bare hands.) but he was thankful for it.

he drove you back to your apartment, even after you persisted on walking home, seeing as it wasn't that far. he refused, insisting that he drive you. he even followed you up the stairs to the door of your apartment.

you turned around to face him, "you know, you're not so bad when you actually wanna talk to me."

"you know, you're not so bad when you're not drunk." he countered, his lips breaking into a playful grin.

you glared jokingly, "hey! don't make me apologise again."

"okay, okay. i won't." he said, raising his hands in defence.

you smiled, resting against the door, "alright, well, i've really enjoyed hanging out with you today. maybe we should catch up more often."

"maybe we should." he said, bearing a coy smile, "bye, y/n. i'll see you around."

————————

it was only about a week later he showed up at your work, at the end of your shift. you were pleasantly surprised to see him, and at first thought he was just someone coming to book a room.

"hello, are you looking for a r— yeosang?"

"when do you get off work?" he asked, glancing over to the clock.

"five minutes."

"i'll be waiting in the car, okay?" he said, turning on his heel and heading for the door.

on his way out, you saw as he ran into your boss, the two of them beginning conversation.

"it's good to see you've made those security changes." yeosang said as he nodded, extending his arm for a friendly handshake. "i'm very thankful."

your boss shook his hand, "and i'm thankful that you suggested them."

just over five minutes later you got into the passenger seat of yeosang's car.

"it was you who told my boss about the safety problems." you said, in near disbelief.

"hello, to you too." he joked sarcastically. "well, i would hate to think that the situation could happen again, so i just suggested some possible improvements. thats all." he shrugged like it was nothing.

"suddenly, i feel the need to make it up to you again." you smiled shyly.

"you can do that by accompanying me to the skate park." he said, motioning to his skateboard on the back seat.

"ah, so thats why you came."

"well yeah, i wanted to bring you to the skate park."

your heart swelled once again, feeling joyed that he wanted to share one of his favourite places with you. (despite him never telling you directly, you knew he loved the skate park as he spent majority of his high school time there when he wasn't studying.)

when you arrived, the sun was beginning to slip behind the horizon, causing the sky to glow a rosy pink. there were still a few kids, probably high schoolers, hanging around the park. you took a seat at a bench and waited for yeosang to come over, who was getting his skateboard out the car. you felt oddly out of place since you were still in your neat work uniform and didn't know the first thing about skateboarding.

yeosang rolled over with a grin plastered onto his face, you'd never seen him so happy, and it made you happy to see him this way. it was strange how all it took was a few cups of coffee for him to become a completely different person around you.

he didn't need to ask you to watch as your eyes were already glued to him as he dropped into the bowl, showing countless tricks and flips.

the truth was in fact that yeosang was grateful for you 'making it up to him'. he'd never been able to comprehend his feelings for you, if they were even feelings at all. he hated the confusion and decided it was easier to ignore it, and to an extent, ignore you, to make it go away. it had been working for the most part, until every time the two of you were alone together, he couldn't ignore the slight tug at his heart, that was becoming more of a pull over the last few weeks.

"you're amazing!" you cheered as he sat down next to you, out of breath.

"thanks." he smiled shyly, running a hand through his hair and out of his face. he leaned back, looking up at the sky. "do you sometimes wish you could see the stars from within the city? hongjoong and seonghwa are so lucky they can see them from their house."

you pondered a moment, thinking about the last time you actually saw stars in the sky. "i see stars in your eyes sometimes." you said, absent minded.

he felt warmth burning in his cheeks, "you do?"

"do what?" you turned to him, "did i say that out loud?" you gasped, covering your face in embarrassment. "i'm sorry, i didn't mean to say that it was just a thought and—"

"what did i say about apologising?" he laughed. "it's getting cold, right? you ready to head home?" he asked.

you smiled, "if you are."

he drove you home and said goodbye, feeling happy about spending time alone with you once again. he couldn't stop thinking about what you said and you couldn't stop feeling like a fool for saying it.

————————

the weather got colder and colder and soon it began to snow as the days of december passed. you had spent the day helping jongho move some new furniture into his apartment. it was a difficult job, but easier with the two of you, even san and wooyoung came to help. you couldn't resist wondering where yeosang was and why he didn't come, seeing as they lived in the same building. maybe he was busy, you thought.

"hey, where's yeosang?" you asked, lifting a box and placing it on the kitchen counter.

"at home, i think he's been feeling sick or something, he hardly comes out of his room lately." wooyoung shrugged, assuming it was all good.

"if he's sick i'll bring him over some food and painkillers, maybe keep him some company." you explained, not wanting yeosang to be unwell.

"i think he'd rather be left alone, to be honest." san said, giving wooyoung a side glance that you couldn't miss.

you pulled out your phone and sent yeosang a quick message.

you: are you feeling okay? san and woo said you were sick :((

he didn't respond right away and you just figured he was asleep. but as you finished helping out at jongho's house a few hours later, he still hadn't responded. when you were sitting down to eat dinner at home, he still hadn't respond. just before you were going to turn the lights out and go to bed, he still hadn't responded.

something was up. this wasn't like yeosang, not anymore. not since the two of you had been spending so much time together. maybe it was like the boys said, and he was truly very sick, but in that case, why wouldn't they let you help?

————————

days passed and you went to work as usual, repeating the same few lines, asking people if they want a room, asking them to fill in a form, then directing them to the right room. days passed and you still hadn't heard back from yeosang, you wondered if he was still sick. days passed and you began to think maybe you should go over there to see if he's okay.

but if there was one thing you'd learnt about yeosang recently, it was that he was the quieter type, and probably wouldn't appreciate you going over there to keep him company and would rather be alone. so that evening when you got off work, you didn't go visit him like you so desperately wanted to, instead, you went straight home.

you cooked and ate dinner for yourself, before picking up your phone, only to see still no messages from yeosang.

you: hey woo you: is yeosang feeling better ?

wooyoung: yeah he is

you: well then can i come visit tomorrow ?

wooyoung: i think he's busy wooyoung: sorry

you: its okay woo you: its not your fault !!

you switched your phone off and headed for the shower, trying to wash away the stress and worry for yeosang that had built up over the last few weeks. you had really grown to like him and there was still so much about him you wanted to learn, like when he learned to skateboard or how he got the small scar on the back of his hand, that you'd noticed when ever he brushes his hair out of his eyes.

two years he'd spent, not interested in holding conversation with you and two years you'd spent, wondering what you'd did so wrong. but lately, you felt like you were doing something right around him, getting him to smile and laugh, share his own stories.

you couldn't shake the feeling that maybe he still didn't like you, and had just been trying for wooyoung's sake.

or maybe he was genuinely starting to like you, but you went and fucked it up by weirding him out and telling him about his starry eyes.

or maybe he'd just had enough of you already. decided that a few weeks was enough time spent trying to change things between the two of you.

as you finished showering and changed into comfortable clothes, you glanced at the clock which read 10:56pm. you switched on the television to watch some youtube before going to bed. as you felt yourself dozing off, a faint knock sounded at your door, so quiet you almost missed it.

when you opened the door, you were shocked to see yeosang standing there, leaning against the door frame for support. he looked up at you, his normally starry eyes were dulled with tears.

you rushed forward to him, smelling the alcohol as you got closer, "yeosang are you okay? what are you doing here? i thought you were sick. are you drunk? you never drink, come inside." you gently pulled him inside, closing the door behind you. when you turned to face him, he was staring at you, tears about to spill over the brim of his eyes.

"i hate you." he breathed out, voice barely louder than a whisper. he didn't seem angry though, he looked fragile, like a glass vase balancing on the edge of a table.

you felt the urge to cry, finally hearing those three words that confirmed your biggest concern, yeosang disliking you. "yeosang, i'm so sorry. i never meant to—"

"i hate you." he said, louder this time before running a hand through his hair hastily. he let out a frustrated groan, dragging his hands down his face. "i hate the tugging feeling in my heart whenever we're alone. i hate the way you put yourself before others. i hate the way you ramble on when you're nervous. i hate the way your eyes sparkle when you laugh. i hate the way i don't drink around you because i feel the need to protect you and make sure you're safe. i hate the way i tried to ignore you for two years because i was scared and confused about my own feelings. i hate how it only took one cup of coffee with you for my walls to come crashing down!" he paced from side to side, waving his hands around crazily.

yeosang looked scared and lost, like he'd never felt this way about anyone before, and that was the truth. he didn't know how to comprehend these feelings and it terrified him.

you watched as he spiralled, seeming as though it would never stop. you weren't sure what to do, so you just listened to that swelling feeling in your heart once again, the one that had led you to develop feelings for yeosang, and you pulled him close into your arms. he clung onto you tightly, scared to let go, like if he did then he'd lose you forever. you ran your fingers through his hair briefly, trying your best to comfort him.

"i'm sorry." you repeatedly whispered to him. you'd never meant to upset him or confuse him.

yeosang let out a quiet sob into your chest, "i hate the way i've fallen in love with you." he croaked out.

he didn't hate you. never did. never will. your heart swelled completely in your chest, feeling as though it would burst through. but it couldn't be true. he's totally drunk out of his mind.

"you're not in your right mind, yeosang, you need to get home. you're drunk and talking nonsense." you embraced him tightly one more time, and you could've sworn you felt the beat of his heart through the hug. "come on," you urged, steering him towards the door, "wooyoung and san are probably worried and waiting up for you."

with much effort, you led him down the stairs of your apartment block and walked him home. the street lamps led you in the freezing city night air. you held his wrist lightly, guiding him up the stairs to his own apartment. he didn't speak a single word the whole time, instead, sniffling and wiping at his eyes. it hurt you so much to see him this broken, but you knew he wasn't saying the truth under control of the alcohol in his veins.

you knocked at his apartment door, hoping that one of the boys were still awake. luckily, they both were and quickly they flung the door open.

"y/n? yeosang?" san questioned, his eyes wide open with disbelief.

"we've been so worried about you!" wooyoung said, pulling yeosang away from you. "hang on, are you drunk?"

san had noticed his tired, tear stained eyes, "you look like you've been crying! are you okay?"

you let out a quiet sigh, knowing you didn't need to be here anymore. you gave a small wave goodbye and headed home, utterly exhausted.

and though you were so drained, you couldn't seem to fall asleep. those words yeosang said to you kept running through your mind busily.

did he mean any of it?

————————

yeosang felt bad. he felt terrible. like he wanted to vanish into thin air and float away with the breeze. though he couldn't, no, he desperately wanted to apologise to you. but he didn't know how, he wasn't good with words or expressing his feelings, and you wished he knew that was something you loved about him.

wooyoung and san tried to ask him what happened the night he drunkenly confessed to you, but he couldn't have them know that he'd been harbouring feelings for you for all this time, they'd never let him live it down. he could imagine the continuous teasing they'd give him, nudging him whenever you were together or giving him side glances after talking to you.

yeosang gave it lots of thought. he mulled it over in his head repeatedly. it was only after hours spent hidden away in his room that he decided to go back to where it all started, a text. a text that said how much he wanted to make it up to you for having to deal with him drunk, just like the one you'd sent initially.

yeosang: hey y/n, i feel really bad about the other day, i wanna know how i can make it up to you! T^T

your heart leapt a mile seeing his name appear on your phone. you grinned upon reading his message, realising it was scarily similar to the message you had first sent him.

you: hmmm you: that sounds familiar

yeosang: >.< yeosang: seriously though, how does dinner at my place tomorrow night sound? i'll cook

you: you can cook?

yeosang: there's a lot you don't know about me x_x

you: okay, i'll be there !!

————————

yeosang wasn't lying when he said he can cook. as you traipsed up the stairs of his apartment block you could smell something delicious laced in the air.

the usual swelling in your heart had instead fell to the pit of your stomach, you were feeling slightly nervous as to what would happen when you entered yeosang's apartment. you inhaled deeply before knocking at the door of his apartment.

"hey y/n, come in." yeosang greeted, holding an arm out, signalling for you to come inside.

"you must've been working hard cooking! it smells delicious." you said, feeling a sense of comfort just from the smell of food.

"yeah, lucky i sent wooyoung and san over to jongho's place, otherwise i doubt there would be any pasta to serve." he joked. "you can take a seat, i've just gotta serve up."

you sat down in front of a neatly laid table, it had somewhat surprised you how much effort yeosang had put into this dinner tonight. he placed a steamy hot plate of pasta in front of you and one where he would sit.

"so." he began.

"so." you copied, teasingly.

"i guess, i really just wanted to say i'm sorry for how i behaved the other night when i was drunk. you shouldn't of had to deal with that." he frowned, poking at his dinner.

you furrowed your brows, "it's seriously fine yeosang." you took a bite of pasta, "i was just surprised to see you drunk, since you never drink."

he chuckled, bringing a hand up to cover his mouth, "actually, i do. i just never drink when you're there."

"really? why?" you questioned, eating another mouthful of pasta.

"because..." he paused. "no, it sounds dumb out loud."

"it's okay, you don't have to explain yourself." you smiled warmly, "but that does remind me to ask... do you remember anything you said to me while you were drunk?" you leant forward, genuinely curious.

he sighed, "i remember.. enough."

"you don't really hate me, right?" you asked, playing with the food on your plate.

"of course not! that's why i invited you here tonight. to show you that i don't, and to make it up to you." he had to refrain from reaching across to hold your hand, just to show how much he cared that little bit more.

you nodded, "well, thats good. i was kinda worried that we'd gone back to square one."

comfort settled within you. it was relieving to know you weren't hated by the one person whose love you wanted most. a tiny thought crept into your mind, maybe, just maybe, now would be the right time to tell him about your blossoming feelings for him. or would that confuse him more? now you were the one feeling conflicted.

"are you finished eating?" he asked, reaching for your empty plate.

"yes, thank you! it was delicious. you're a good cook, y'know."

"ah, thanks y/n." he turned away to hide the blush appearing on his cheeks.

"would you like me to do the dishes? since you cooked." you offered, standing up. but he quickly opposed.

"don't be ridiculous." he shooed you back to your seat. "can i get you a coffee? water? wine?"

"a coffee sounds good, i think you and i have had too many drunken situations lately." you laughed.

yeosang pulled out two mugs and put the kettle on. he felt your eyes carefully watching him. once again, he hated the feeling that was pulling at his heart. the way you could say nothing, yet he felt everything.

"can i tell you something?" you asked, voice now quieter and more hesitant.

"sure, what is it?" he said, placing a warm cup of coffee in front of you.

you took a sip, humming in delight. it was exactly the way you liked it. when the two of you went out for coffee, he had unintentionally remembered just the way you like it.

"well," you began cautiously, in case you brought this situation into flames again. "i just... i always wondered why you didn't like me. if i was doing something wrong, if i said something once that really upset you. and then after we started spending time together, i finally felt like i was doing the right thing." you groaned, frustrated with yourself for not getting to the point quicker. "what i'm trying to say is that i have feelings for you. it's okay if you don't feel the same way. i wouldn't expect you to, i just thought you should know—"

yeosang basically choked on his coffee, eyes widening in shock. "it's okay, y/n! in case you hadn't noticed, i'm crazy about you."

you had continued to ramble nervously before hearing what he said.

"wait. you are?"

"basically ever since you said that thing about stars in my eyes, yes."

you cringed, remembering how you had said that so absent minded. "yeah, sorry about that."

"it's okay, it was cute. and what did i say about apologising?"

you shook your head and smiled, "i know."

————————

ever since the two of you confessed to each other, you had been almost inseparable, except of course when you had work. but he dropped you home most nights, even though you insisted it was okay and that you could walk. he came over every weekend just to spend time with you, even if the two of you just sat and talked, enjoying each other's company. you'd been dating for a few weeks now, but kept it undercover, not wanting to suffer the incessant questioning that would come if you told your friends.

it didn't go unnoticed either, wooyoung and san were constantly nagging yeosang about why the two of you spent so much time together, and each time he just shrugged it off.

christmas was just around the corner, so you were spending the evening at seonghwa's and hongjoong's house, who of course, were throwing an unnecessarily large house party to celebrate.

you were sat between a very drunk yunho and mingi, who were trying to talk to an also very drunk jongho. you eyed your boyfriend from across the room, as if asking for a way out and he just laughed at the situation you were stuck in.

after at least ten minutes more of having your ear talked off, yeosang came to pull you away to the dance floor.

"care to dance?" he asked, extending his hand to you.

you immediately jumped up, latching onto his hand, "i would love to!"

he chuckled, pulling you close to his side and leading you to the makeshift dance floor that seonghwa and hongjoong created.

the two of you laughed at the boys' reaction. they were completely shocked to see the two of you so close together and yeosang being friendly.

he twirled you around a few times with the music, before settling his arms around your waist. he brought you near to him as you placed your arms behind his neck. you swayed back and forth, engulfed in your own little bubble of comfort in each other's arms, completely out of time with the loud thumping music that blared around you.

you felt content, and yeosang no longer felt confused. he found his home in your arms and his happiness.

you reached up to place your lips on his, capturing the moment surrounding you. yeosang melted into the kiss, discovering that your lips were soft and sweet against his, just as he had imagined, which caused his knees to feel weak and his heart to skip more than just one beat. he never wanted to let you go, he wanted to compensate for every second that he didn't spend with you since the two of you met.

he leaned forward and whispered softly, just so you could hear above all the music and singing, "lets stay like this forever."

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