#im dying yall

[ferindencadash]

Is there anything that makes time go slower than waiting for urgent care to open?

[cashandprizes]

having the biggest brain moment because the solaire family/twilight parallels are so hilarious and right fucking there

Vincent is Edward

Lovely is Bella

Adam is James

William is Carlisle

Sam is Jasper

Alexis is Rosalie

[justanerdy-gal]

HOYOVERSE I CAN’T BREATHE I DID NOT EXPECT THIS AT 3 AM IN THE MORNING THEY ARE SO BEAUTIFUL

I DON’T KNOW WHY THEIR EXPRESSIONS GET ME SO 😍

AND I MEAN LOOK AT CHILDE WITH HIS ELECTRIC GUITAR

EVERYONE PLAYING MUSIC TOGETHER MAKES ME SOFT

AND ZHONGLI DIRECTING IS SOMETHING I DIDN’T KNOW I NEEDED UNTIL NOW

THANK YOU HOYOVERSE ❤️

[nickbutnodick]

guess who got a horrible case of COVID-19 on my favorite holiday, the day before my birthday, and two days before my birthday party!

[applebeebuck]

oh my fucking GOD almight I CANT 😭😭😭😭😭

[slutdge]

trying to stay awake to fix your sleep schedule

[candewlsy]

Having q mouth and tounge ulcer on both side of your mouth is painful than a break up or any pain in the world????!!?

[houseofpurplestars]

Never seen anything like the way the lokius fandom hoards nsfw art. Never in all my years.

[the-cookie-of-doom]

Hello, young nursing students, please consult at least 5 medical journals - that we know you don't have the medical literacy to understand - and write us a 5 page report in APA format - yes we know you've never written that style before because you've only used MLA for the last 10 years, no we're not going to teach you anything about the formatting or provide any resources - and also this paper is worth most of the grade for this class. And the day it's due, you also have to act out the symptoms for the graduating class to triage you like an ER patient. Have fun : )

--sincerely, my teacher

[worth-this-and-more]

me everytime i remember oathbound is five months away

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[dailytraingirl]

close my eyes and pretend I didn’t just have a panic attack at the doctor

THEY WANTED TO STICK AND INCH LONG NEEDLE IN MY ARM TO TEST FOR LYME DISEASE

[kitanas-lastkiss]

YALL I JUST HAD A HEART ATTACK I TRIED TO REBLOG SOMETHING W/ ADDED TAGS AND THE SITE CRASHED AND I THOUGHT I GOT BANNED AHAHA

[gusbuses]

How to get cute girls to talk to you: have a puppy

[mymomsaiditwasaphase]

I hate summer so much I aint made for this

[unknownspecies]

buying toshi those slutty little compression shirts because his titties look so good in them

[1hot-mess-express1]

hear me out… toge with a spit kink, forcing you to open your mouth and stick out your tongue w his cursed speech so he can spit inside it, he abuses his power to dominate in the bedroom bc he keeps it pent up all day ffkdkskdkska

Listen, friend I hear you but also

I feel like he wasn't nasty AT FIRST. He was way too nervous and shy to do anything too mean; you for sure took his Vcard, so like at first, he was a little baffled, not sure what to do with himself. However, after the drunk!Toge incident....he had ideas. Absolutely nasty, vile thoughts on the regular, but despite his vulgar mouth and asshole humor, he's a sweet boy, so he kept them to himself. That quickly changes, however, when he's knuckle-deep in your pussy, curling his fingers in a way that has you slack-jawed and moaning his name. He can't help the way he stares at your mouth, or more specifically, your tongue. It's so soft and inviting, just begging to be spit on. He momentarily fantasizes about spitting in your mouth and forcing you to hold it there until you cum on his hand, effectively shutting up the cute noises you were making for him, forcing you to taste him the whole time he was rearranging your guts with his much larger hand. He groans at the thought and bucks his hips into the mattress slightly, but he's pulled from his thoughts when you lean up to whisper in his ear, "Tell me what you want....mmm, wan' you to force me...please." All sense of respectability goes out the window in an instant as he's gripping your jaw with one hand while the other one stuffed in your cunt takes on a brutal pace. "Open your mouth," his voice is misleadingly stern, as he feels himself get impossibly harder at the way your jaw hangs slack immediately, tongue sticking out slightly to taunt him. He leans down and spits directly on the surface of the pink muscle before telling you to "Close your mouth and don't swallow." His throat is getting mildly hoarse, but he can't bring himself to care. Not when you look like this, melting under his touch, jaw clenched shut as spit dribbles down the side of your mouth, trying desperately to obey his command.

He was a full blown menace after that, I'm praying for your cewchie

(Anon tbh at first I read this and was like....nah...my sweet boy? no way, buuuuuuut.....honestly......This is incredibly hot and I will be throwing myself out a window