#im crying throwing up banging my head on the wall 😭

[pyaari-naari]

Stress ki wajah se hairfall ho raha hai.

Hairfall ki wajah se stress ho raha hai.

On loop.

[skitskatdacat63]

this video makes me want to sob and throw up and scream and cry and collapse onto the floor

[starluvsx]

★𝐀𝐧𝐠𝐞𝐥𝐢𝐜

𝐌𝐚𝐭𝐭 𝐬𝐭𝐮𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐨𝐥𝐨 𝐱 𝐟𝐞𝐦!𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐞𝐫

Proofread:kinda...not rlly

Wordcount:2266

WARNINGS:throw up/emetophobia , panic attack, crying, this takes place before they’re like famous or wtv.also this is very long.

A/N:ntm on the banner idk what happened😭

“Guess where I’m going tonight”I said to the boy I was on the phone with.my best friend Matt.he was playing video games while I got ready.probably not paying much attention to what I was doing but definitely listening.

“Where?” he questioned as his face twisted into one of frustration.most likely because of the game he was playing.

“I’m going to hailys party” I cheekily said.smiling just at the thought of what tonight would be like.

“Isn’t that like all seniors?” he asked, concern lacing his tone.even though we were both the same age he always acted like my older brother.

"uh yea, i'll be fine dont worry.im not gonna like get fucked by a 20 year old or end up passed out in the street.im a responsible person matt."i rambled on

"i know you are but- shit...seniors can be pretty intense sometimes" the boy on the other line explained

"ill be fine dude, ok anyways, what outfit do i wear?" i said while show-casing two outfits that lay on separate hangers.

"im kinda in the middle of something right now"

"i dont care, just look for a second"

"y/n i litterally cant"

"matthew bernard sturniolo turn your fucking head this direction and help me pick out an outift or i swear to God"

"ok ok jeez" he said as he hesitantly turned to face his phone screen. "i don't like either of them"

"oh fuck you" i said as i put my phone onto its back so i could change into one of the outfits.

✧At the party

a large smile was painted on my face as i swayed my hips to the beat of the music. I've never felt more alive.the freshly poured drink splishing and splashing around in the cup i was holding, small droplets finding a home on my wrist. despite this being me being only a junior i was mixing well with the crowd.not feeling awkward or like i didn't belong for a second

a tap on my shoulder stopped my movements abruptly.i turned around to where the feeling came from only to see the girl that i came here with, Serenity. she looked deepyly upset which wasnt usual for the cheerful girl. "hey sese, whats up?" i yelled over the loud music.im not even sure if she could hear me.

"i feel sick" serenity answered. i quickly grabbed her hand and bee-lined it to the bathroom.she had been drinking alot.way more then me.and i was sure that what she mean t by 'i feel sick' was 'im about to throw up' and i want that to be no where else but the toilet.for her dignity and my sanity.

i banged on the door of the first bathroom i came across. "occupied!" someone yelled from the other side, forcing me to practically drag serenity down the crowded hallway to another bathroom.once we made it to the white door i realized there was no point in knocking because i could hear two drunken people going at it as if it were their last night on earth.

panic began to set in at the same pace as reality.no more bathrooms in sight. shit shit shit i mentally cursed to myslef as i looked over at a half folded over serenity. "y/n i think im gonna throw up"the blonde girl stated

i quietly mumbled "no no your not, please don't, not here" but my pleads were to no eval as once the words left my mouth so did all of the drinks serenity had earlier.it was all over me.my shirt and jeans and even my white shoes. i screamed in panic. tears spilling out of my eyes almost automatically.

as my eyes darted all over the place i noticed the bathroom door where the couple once were fucking was now open.i put my hand on serenities back and shoveled her into the bathroom, careful not to touch any of the vomit on my shirt.she dropped to her knees and went head first into the toilet at the sight of it.the sounds making me gag internally.

i slid down the wall behind me and sobbed.not being able to escape the vomit.i pulled my phone out of my back pocket and opened my contacts.i was about to call my mom to pick me up before i looked at the time. '1:48' it read. she was most definitely asleep. the scrolled through my contacts looking for someone that could come pick me up.

'Matty boy' was the name my eyes locked on, not even waiting a second before calling him.the phone rang longer than i would've liked it to as i pressed it up to my ear. please pick up i mentally begged "hey y/n." a sleepy Matt said on the other line.

i wasted no time "Matt please-please come get me"i choked out through cries.

"what?whats going on?are you ok?"he asked.now sounding more alert and awake

"serenity threw up on me and i-i don't know what to do.please just come get me.please Matt"i begged through the phone.tears sprung out my eyes and rolled down my face, leaving marks of dripping mascara to stain my cheeks.

"ok ill be there in a few minutes.wheres serenity now?"Matt asked.i hadn't even noticed her.i looked down from the ceiling i was staring at and locked eyes with her body.

"she's passed out...o-on the bathroom floor"i slowly got out.

"ok y/n listen to me very carfully,i need you to call haily and tell her serenity is in the bathroom passed out and that you need a chnage of clothes okay?do not leave serenity there." the boy on the other line stated very seriously. i mumbled a small 'okay 'before Matt began talking again "ill be there in a few minutes, don't move from the bathroom."he said before hanging up.silence now filling my ears.

✧Some time later

serenity was now gone after being taken to hailys room so she could sober up.i have a change of clothes on, some large sweat pants and a 'the smiths' t-shirt. although my clothes were now in the washer being clean from throw up, i couldn't get the thought out of my head.

this night, my first real party, had gone to shit.i was tried, scared, my makeup was ruined, my back hurt.i just want to go home. then as if my thoughts were read a knock came at the door. "come in"i lightly shouted.

as soon as the door opened and matt was visible i sprung up from my spot on the floor.hugging the boy before either of us could say anything.sobbing into his shoulder. "its okay.its okay.im here."the brunnete boy said into my hair

he held my back as we walked through the sea of people in order to make it to the exit.drunken others staring at us we walked by.i grabbed my coat which had somehow not bee touched the whole night, a dark blue zip up hoodie.i felt goosebumps go up my arms a I put it on.

the cold air hit my face unexpectidely.the winter weather sending shock through my warm body.a smile krept onto my face for an unidentified reason. i brought my arms over my chest and folded them. "why are you smiling?"matt asked while looking over at me.a smile on his face aswell

"i dont know" i answred with a small giggle.once we finally made it to the car i hobbled myself into the front passenger seat.the car was practically silent as he put the key in the ignition and started it.not much being needed to be said.

Once we pulled out of the carefully chosen parking spot I advised Matt to not drive me home seeing as my mom would probably kill me.a small hum of approval being the only noise to come from him.

This silence was soon followed up with an unexpected “thank you”from Matt. “For calling me when you needed to and not being stubborn”he clarified

A vocal response didn’t seem to fit the situation so I simply nodded in acknowledgment. “My parents are actually out on vacation so there’s no harm in you staying the night by the way, went to Maine or something.” He began to speak.I didn’t respond.only looking out the window infront of me.

“So what was it like?your first senior party?”the driving boy asked as he focused on the road infront of us.the street lights and cars illuminating his pale face.

“Well besides being thrown up on and having a whole panic attack it was pretty good.the drinks were alright and a few guys hit on me but besides that it was just alright”I answered his question.

“Not everything you dreamed of?”matt asked teasingly. Shaking my head no in response “Bummer.well now you get to spend the night with me” he continued as we pulled into his driveway.i never realized how close he lived to Haily.

Once we entered the house I was met with Chris sitting at the kitchen table. “Woah what happened to you”Chris asked.looking up from his cereal and phone.

“A party” I weakly answered.

“Oh is that y/n?”Nick asked from the couch as he turned his head around to face me. “Hey baeee, had a rough night?”he greeted and questioned.

“Rough Night is the understatement of the century”I grumbled as I opened their fridge searching for water.

“You went to hailys party right?yea those seniors are crazy.are those your clothes?”Nick rambled on.

“No these are hailys,serenity threw up on me.”I casually answered,shuddering at the remembrance of what happened.I stretched my arm out to grab the advil in their top shelf.

“Oh gross.you sleeping here tonight?”chris chimed in and asked.

“Yea, no point in going home and getting my ass beat.”I exaggerated

“Where you sleepin?”chris asked again

“Not with you, last time you punched me right in the boob, painful as fuck.”I retorted as I swapped the pills and water.

“Dude it was an accident!i was sleeping!”he answered as he threw his hand sup in defense.making me giggle.

“Not taking any chances”

“Well you can’t sleep with me.”Nick stated suddenly

“Why?”

“My bed is fucking lopsided and I have to sleep on the couch till it’s fixed” Nick said

“Just sleep in Chris’ room”

“He fucking attacks me in his sleep!”

“What about Matt?”

“He’s up too late for me, I need my eight hours but I guess this kid only needs 8 minutes” Nick answered my few questions causing me to lightly laugh

“Ok then I guess I’m sleeping in your room Matty boy”I said, turning to the boy who had just been listening to this conversation silently.

“Ok then cmon,I’m going to bed right now”he tiredly said as he walked in the direction of his room.

“I find that hard to believe”Nick shouted from his place in the couch.

I hugged Chris and Nick before following Matt into his room.

Upon opening the door I saw Matt face down on the mattress. “Jeez I didn’t think you were that tired” I joked as I sat down on the bed next to him.the calming blue led lights coloring us and the rest of the room around us.

He turned his head sideways to face me “I’m always tired”he mumbled.I situated my body so I was now laying next to him more comfortably.we then gradually moved ourselves to face each other while laying on our sides.his eyes staring into mine deeply.

"your beautiful" I whispered under my breath. ive always though Matt was attractive.not in a sexual way but the same way I think Alahna is pretty.but tonight was different.the way the blue lights bounced off his face, and how his messy hair rested almost perfectly on his forehead, or maybe it was how his dark, tired, eyes never seemed to look scary or weird on him.nonetheless he looked a way I don't even think I could describe if you put the words out in-front of me.

"your angelic..." I found myself say as my heart was taking action before my brain.i brushed some hair out of his eyes delicately with my fresh painted nails.he didn't respond, only giving me small smile.i caressed the side of his face with the back of my hand.tracing his facial structure.

"I love you" he abruptly said.the three words causing blood to rush to my cheeks rapidly.my heart besting faster almost as if on command

"I'll always love you more"I solemnly said.not exactly wanting to see his reaction to my words i moved in a little closer and closed my eyes.curling up and grabbing the covers.to my surprise though, after a few minutes I could feel his arm sake over my body and pull me closer.my head resting under his chin lightly.

then we fell asleep peacefully.silently hoping that if we were to never to wake up again that we stay together in the next life

[celestie0]

just wanna let u know i’ve been screaming crying shitting throwing up banging my head against the wall over the last few chapters of kick off. the angst is tooooo good !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ur honestly one of the best writers i’ve read in a rlly rlly rlly long time and kickoff got me back into fanfic (i took a break for like years lol) ty for ur service 🫡🫡

LMAO PLS DONT SHIT URSELF WHILE READING FANFICTION

😭😖💕 aaa im so gladdd,, i know its been hella angsty these past few but im so happy its still enjoyed in those capacities 🤣 IM SOBBINGKGKGKG PLS DONT BE NICE TO ME I WILL CRY <333 IM SO FLATTERED TO HEAR THAT welcome back to the world of fanfics!!!

thank u sm bb ✨

[palajae]

Can you hear that? .....

It's the sound of my heart breaking because of the last it's just update and what Niki said honestly I'm crying throwing up screaming banging my head against the wall I'm so sad they HAVE to get together like I can't believe he would say and do that even if he doesn't like us back he's SUPPOSED TO BE OUR FRIEND OUR PARTNER OUR BESTIE 😭😭😭

-🍓

FR 💔💔 im sorry for all the pain i caused eodnekdj

the next part will be out tmrw or the day after (it’s thursday for me) so hopefully that eases your mind a little…

[sevlawless]

Hiiii can we please talk about the newest Seven POV that just dropped because I’m shitting crying throwing up. Me and my mc are both fucking FOOLS for Seven but getting a real look at just how much Seven hates MC made me like. SOB BRO? SEVEN HOW DO YOU NOT GET THAT UR ALSO IN THE WRONG U SELFISH ASS! I’m curious if Arabella was able to hear Seven’s internal thoughts about her, what would she really think??

(Hope it’s okay to talk about infamous in ur ask box!! You’ve been one of fave blogs since wayhaven and I don’t have any mutuals to discuss w hahaha)

NO HONESTLY 😭😭 I WAS BANGING MY HEAD AGAINST THE WALL PLAYING LIKE MFER YOU ARE SO SICK !!!!! but i also eat it up LMFAOKSJSNSBSNSJ that is just the duality of being a seven lawless stannie 💔

seven being so delusional and overdramatic never fails to make me bust out laughing like KSKSJDBDBDNDKD you are sending yourself into a crisis DAILY over mc and then you have the nerve to be like "i hate them im better off without them" GET UP !

also hm i feel like arabella already tells herself in her head that seven hates her (when that is obviously not true LMFAO) so if she heard their inner thoughts she wouldn't be surprised in the slightest. i feel like they both expect a level of hatred toward each other when in reality ... so ig they rlly are perfect for one another in that sense

and please u can ALWAYS send infamous asks i will always entertain the brainrot <3 also omg not u being a natesewell/sevlawless veteran thank u for ur service 🫡 LMFAOSKSKNSNS

[aestherin]

CRYING, THROWING UP, SLIDING DOWN MY THE WALL DRAMATICALLY, BANGING MY HEAD ON THE WALL, RIPPING MY HAIR OUT, SCREAMING, PUNCHING AIR, ROLLING IN DIRT AND EATING SAND ANGRILY.

AYAYN.. MY SCRUNKLIES.. PLS DON'T BREAK THEM UP MY HEART COULD NEVER BRO I WAS WAITING FOR ANGST BUT I CAN'T TAKE THIS ANGST😞 BRO THE THREADS HAS YN GOT.. BRO I CAN'T TAKE THIS PLS. I'M GOING TO CRY PLS DON'T BREAK THEM UP. DO ALL ANGST YOU WANT BUT DON'T BREAK THEM UP PLS. PLS I HATE KIKYO AND HER FANS AND AYAKIKYO FANS AND SCARAYN FANS PLS

NAUR😭

this is what u get for looking forward to the angst😔💔 also... do all angst i want?🤭

ty for the abundance of pics im gonna go and steal them rq🏃

[mintgki]

i’ve been keeping up with on guard for a while and let me tell you this is literally the finest piece of literature i’ve come across. you do such a good job with the humor and the set up of it all. 🫶🫶

…what if i told u i was kickin my feet? crying? head in my hands? what if i told u im banging my head against the wall? bit cheeky rn? giggling and throwing up? looking at the moon in tears? starring at my mingi photocards in disbelief? clutching my phone in distress? hm? wyd?.

Thank u soo…soooo… so much. u have 0 idea how much I love reading these since ive only posted TWO fics and only one of those being finished 😭. IM SO HAPPY YOU LIKE IT SO FAR SINCE I RLLY LIKE MAKING THINGS A BIT LIKE A SLOWBURN AND NOT MANY PEOPLE ENJOY THAT 😭 I LOVE U SM I HOPE TO SEE U IN MY NOTIFICATIONS OFTEN ML ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️

now onto the serious business. u leaning towards ofg!hongjoong or ofg!seonghwa.

[love-strawberry]

met you at the right time

summary : in which they break up but find their way back to each other.

pairing : harry styles x reader

warnings : language

author's note : hiiiiii!! omg i missed on writing here, im so sorry for going mia but im back!! requests are open and so is my inbox, go crazy. i love you all, thank you for sticking around. also, this fic is inspired by feels like by gracie abrams

tagged : @slut4benbarnes @ellora-brekker @0oolookitsme @ateliefloresdaprimavera

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liked by tchalamet, taylorswift, chrisevans and 4,719,714 others

y/n_ 'in the morning i'll be better' out now!! for the past 11 months, i've put my EVERYTHING in this album and to see it releasing is a dream come true. hope you all like this album <3 thank you so much for supporting me, i love you all endlessly!!

105,829 comments

username this hurt

username "i play pretend, try to act like i'm fine, look the other way, so you don't see me cry, i'm fine, look, it's alright" ouch-

username "cause even when im drunk you're the one i'd call, 2:30 in the morning and you seemed like home" hurts my soul

arianagrande AHHHHHH

username "cause what if i don't wanna lose you, what if missed it and now it's over"

username her and harry </3

username she went from "writing our names on the walls, said forever and that stayed true" to "now im scratching our initials trying to make sense of what happened"

selenagomez !!!!!

username "cause now you got some inside jokes with the others and im still replaying your laugh in my mind, i do mind, yeah im not fine"

username my head hurts thinking about her and harry

username i wanna scream and ugly cry now i miss harry and y/n so fucking much like why did they have to break up

louist91 so beautiful love!!! loved it so much <3

niallhoran 🦋🦋🦋

username I KNOW WE NEVER LABELLED IT BUT I'D LIKE TO THINK YOU WERE IT FOR ME, MY FOREVER, MY HEART AND SOUL, MY LOVER FORLORN

conangray brb gonna go and scream into my pillow, bang my head into the wall and ugly cry </3

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liked by billieeilish, jefezoff, mitchrowland and 4,529,951 others

harrystyles 'same group of friends' out now. i hope you all love it as much i did. thank you so much for you support, i love you x

175,528 comments

username ouch

username "cause we got the same group of friends, they keep quiet and try not to strike a nerve when it comes to you and i"

username 😭

jefezoff loving this so much

username im thoroughly convinced that harry and y/n are out to kill us with sadness with these songs

username "can't we just be friends like we were before, or did we just start it for it to come back and ruin us all, guess it's the problem in dating someone you already know"

username my (yourshipname) </3

username please please please PLEASE get back together, my mental health is at sake

louist91 heartwrenching song mate!! loved it

username the chorus>>

username i listened to this song and my soul ascended to heaven

niallhoran amazing beautiful brilliant awesome

username 😭😭

username it's okay, didn't need my heart anyway

mitchrowland in awe of you

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liked by harolddddstylez, y/nheartsharry, (yourshipname)_ and 268,725 others

celebri.tea harry styles and y/n y/l/n broke hearts of millions after announcing their breakup 5 months ago. their publicity team claimed that "it wasn't the right time", "right person, wrong time" and "they weren't seeing a lot of eachother". though, styles and y/l/n have sparked rumours after being spotted together in london, sharing a kiss after styles' show. sources close to them said that "they both sat down and tried to make it work. and it is working, clearly." to read the full article, click here.

68,827 comments

username YESSS

username if they're back together, im gonna cry

username okay so we go heartbreak album from y/n and a heartbreaking song from harry AND they're apparently back together?? harry and y/n won fr

username screaming crying throwing up sliding down the wall banging my head

username brb gonna scream

username JEHXJANXHNSKSMSHXMKAKAJS

username THE IT COUPLE YESS

username so glad that they tried to make things work out

username im sorry for the person i'll become when they announce their relationship

username i bet they're gonna look back at their heartbreak songs and laugh lmfao

username yes yes yes yes yes yes yES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES

username thank fuck

username really hoping this is true

username 😭😭

username everyone, we might be getting them back

username i felt like a child of divorce

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liked by harrystyles, tchalamet, oliviarodrigo and 4,325,824 others

y/n_ met you at the right time

tagged harrystyles

196,528 comments

username no amount of preparation could've prepared for the 2nd pic

username HSISJXNSKXHDHSJKXKSKDJDNDJCKS

username yeah, my cat needs to hear this

niallhoran thank god 🤍🦋

username 😭😭

username my parents

username y'all still paying for the damage you caused with your music

arianagrande love love love loveeeeeeee you both

zendaya FUCKING FINALLY YES

zayn thank you, khai didn't wanna spend christmas with auntie y/n and new year's day with uncle harry

username their friends being relieved is a mood

harrystyles i'm gonna spend every lifetime making it the right time for us <3 i love you

-> y/n_ i love you more than i'll EVER be able to convey

username WHEN?? IS?? IT?? MY?? TURN??

username 🤍👄🤍

username 🦋🦋🦋

selenagomez so happy for you 🤍🦋

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liked by y/n_, tchalamet, mitchrowland and 4,629,925 others

harrystyles this is what it feels like

tagged y/n_

189,628 comments

username HSJDIXJSMXLSMJZ

username THEM>>>

username they're so beautiful

username bi panic

mitchrowland yesssss

tchalamet good, maybe now she'll stop calling me at night to cry about how she missed you

-> y/n_ you're on thin fucking ice timothee

username full on sobbing

username FUCK YESSSS YESSSS

username ❣️❣️❣️

username they invented being in love

y/n_ it feels Iike heaven

-> harrystyles loving you does feel like heaven

username imagine someone loving you the way harry loves y/n, oh right, you CAN'T

username forever gonna be in awe of you

billieeilish my fav couple 🤍

username they're soulmates

username yes officer, these two right here

username !!!!

niallhoran 💟

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[elecmon]

AND THEN! I FIND OUT OFF HANDED! THAT FIRST PRIZE WAS $5,000!!!!!

Management asked me Monday at midnight to paint some windows to our theatre for this Christmas decorating contest the mall was hosting, I say yea! Sure! I'm down!! When does the contest end?

Tomorrow Tuesday! You can finish in 6 ish hours right?

> 22 HOURS OF PAINTING LATER

[hwangsify]

hi irene ^_^ i reread descent to hell for likw 5 times already it is so worth reading i absolutely adore it and it deserves SOOO much more attention n love idc (T⌓T)(T⌓T)(T⌓T)

u deserve all the appreciation cause the way you word things is so fucking unique oh my gawd im gonna die how am i reading this art for FREE actually like im so close to just... 💥💳💥💳💥 banging my *nonexistent* credit card rn

irene （；へ：）talented showstopping flawless everyone cheers when user hwangsify posts!!! #1 fan fr (ᗒᗣᗕ)՞

irene 我爱你 ♡ (is this correct hwlp i got it from google :'0)

crying sobbing on the ground throwing up screaming banging my head on the wall

PLS UR SO SO SO SWEET ILYSM OMG 😭 u literally made my entire fucking week TYTYTYTYTY 😩 UR WRITING IS SO AMAZING TOO OMG IM GOING TO READ MORE OF UR WORKS FROM NOW ON !!!

AND YES ITS CORRECT OMG 我更爱你 !!!!!

also,,, every since i started talking to u on discord i started watching more enhypen vids 🤭🤭🤭 and im literally debating stanning them now so if i ever become an engene,, ur the reason behind it ASLDKFJKSFJLSKJFSDLKJ

[tihgnari]

screaming crying suffering throwing up banging my head against the wall WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS WHO HURT YOU MY HEART MY POOR HEARTUE JAKWOWKISHSKSJSJSI WHY U DO THIS TO ME ROSIE 🥲😭😭😭 WHAT IS THIS SUDDEN ANGST OR SMTH POSTING YHIS ANDKSISJOSLNWIM SOBBING ROSIE??!)@)#(#)#)#0#

GDGSVRHSHAGAHHAHAHAHAHA I DID SAY I WAS IN MY HEARTBROKEN ERA PHASE IM SORRY

[suhnshinehaos]

REESE !!!! the bonus of renjun's deleted twt got me squealing crying screaming throwing up banging my head on the wall punching the air silently sobbing and falling on the ground right now 😭 AAAAAA cant wait for the next part !! also enjoy ur beach trip and take care reese stay safe <3

im the one that told you im a 00z sucker and wish the crush culture could be until part 100 😳

- 00z sucker 🫶🏻

screams in rj forgetting to switch accs wt u 🤭 and awee thank u, i did enjoy my trip a ton but now im excited to get back into it !!