#im convinced neither of them have any idea what theyre doing

[littlegalerion]

Gale stating he chooses you over Mystra's forgiveness right before the Ketheric Thorm fight took me by surprise.

Moon 100% didn't process what was actually said between them until well after the battle was done, they were in camp about to sleep, and then BOOM "...He chose me over a goddess..."

A couple of minutes later, Gale feels a nuzzle on his shoulder and hears awkward dragon noises as Moon has no idea how to express that kind of love in return.

[azulpitlane]

vicious I ln4

pairing: lando norris x reader, a little of charles leclerc x reader🫣 summary: lando's fans always attack you yet he does nothing to defend you, inspired by vicious by sabrina carpenter notes: if youre the anon that requested this sorry it took so long lol! but you were so sweet ty masterlist, part two

yourusername

liked by maxfewtrell, charles_leclerc and 1,829,392 others

yourusername lil getaway

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user wait is she dating lando??

user there's been rumors of them dating for months but neither of them have confirmed user hopefully not lol

user i had no idea she went on this trip

user yeah cause lando never posts her or even likes her posts lmfaoaofda

user am i the only one that finds her annoying...

user nooo everyone else does lol shes always leeching off lando

yourbff ur perfect babe liked by yourusername

user pls dont let this be a hard launch🧎‍♀️lando get UP

user of course she has to post lando🤣she needs him for the likes

maxfewtrell spent more time on the ground than actually skiing

yourusername SHHHH it was my first time

user why are all these comments about lando?? im only looking at her😍

f1gossip

302,837 likes

f1gossip Y/n Y/l/n spotted in Bali celebrating New Years at Martin Garrix's show, possibly with Lando Norris. The two have sparked dating rumors for a few months now but no confirmation has been made from either of them.

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user we might have to start accepting that theyre dating☹️

user I REFUSE

user wait im new to the fandom, whys everyone hating on y/n i love her music...

user shes always posting lando for attention and he clearly has no interest in her, he doesnt even like her posts user plus his ex >>>>>>> y/n

user she doesnt deserve him, he needs someone lowkey and y/n is such an attention whore

user not surprised shes there, always leeching on him

user right like girl give him space, he aint yours

user im a y/n defender idgaf. everyone in these comments are just jealous liked by yourbff

user yikes... user defending someone who needs a man to stay relevant lol ok

user i miss luisinha😭

user im convinced theyre still dating and shes using lando for pr

y/n hey lan, i safely made it back to the hotel

lando 👍

y/n i still dont understand why you wanted me to leave early though, its not even midnight :(

lando y/n, we talked about this. there was lots of paparazzi there and if they saw us together on midnight they would think we're dating

y/n we ARE dating... why are you acting like we arent?

lando yk what i meant im just trying to protect you from the craziness that comes from dating me baby

y/n im already getting hate, hows hiding me any different?

lando lets just not do this tn. yk how much worse its gonna get it if we confirm anything listen i love you, isnt that enough?

y/n yeah, ily too

lando ill see you later tn❤️

lando baby where are you? come on it was a drunk mistake, yk i only love you it was just martins friend, you know her

y/n oh the girl you told me not to worry about?

lando it didnt mean anything why are you acting like this?

y/n because you fucking cheated. im leaving and im moving out of the apartment

lando please dont, im sorry baby i love you

y/n you say you love me but you can never prove it you hid me away for a whole year, was it so you could hook up with other girls?

lando of course not wth but since there's clearly no trust in this relationship maybe we should end it i wish you the best y/n read

yourusername

liked by charles_leclerc, pietrapilao and 3,295,203 others

yourusername new year same me, wasnt ever the problem

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yourbff YES WIFEY liked by yourusername

user she unfollowed lando omg.

user WAR IS OVERRRR

pietrapilao out of sight out of mind🧘‍♀️ liked by yourusername

user is this about lando omg...

luisinhaoliveira99 😍😍 liked by yourusername

user ARIANA WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE??? user WHEN DID THEY MEET??? user I NEED THE TEA RNNNNNN

charles_leclerc 🖤

user OH?

user what is going on in these comments omg??

user shes finally realized lando will never date a girl like her

user hahaha fr she finally deleted all her posts with him user probably gonna go for piastri now🤣

yourusername

liked by charles_leclerc, landonorris and 3,294,234 others

yourusername took some time off music but dont worry, im back and ready to prove i dont need anybody to stay successful

vicious is out now💌

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user OH NOWWW LANDO LIKES HER POST

yourbff sooo back baby

user this has to be about lando...

user the lyrics are heartbreaking omg

user you all owe her a big apology for the way you treated her

charles_leclerc you look good in red this comment has been deleted

charles_leclerc love it! this comment has been deleted

charles_leclerc congrats on the new song!!

taylorswift 💌❤️

user yall better not start switching up!! if you were hating on her, stay away

user are we just going to ignore charles' deleted comments??

user bro was NERVOUS

user we dont know if this is about lando!! they were just friends

user you toxic lando fans need to stay away🙄 she was never seen with anyone else this past year so its clearly about him. hes not some saint you paint him out to be user exactly!! you guys are acting like you know him

user her shirt saying loyal🫣thats gotta be a diss

landonorris

liked by carlossainz55, martingarrix and 630,402 others

landonorris pretty vicious life im living rn

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user the caption??? the hard launch??? oh thats not-

maxfewtrell bro. no.

user his own best friend doesnt approve of his behavior😬

user this winter break drama is something else

user lando i cant keep defending you. why would you caption it this.

user IS THAT NEW YEARS KISS GIRL ON THE THIRD SLIDE???

user yess i found her @ shes martin garrix's friend and she was at that party

user anyone else notice luisa unfollowed him??

user she chose her side HAAHAH user pretty ironic cause so many fans were comparing y/n to her and now theyre friends🤣

user whys everyone mad?? its his private life why do you guys care

user oh so now you guys are giving him privacy?? but when he was rumored to be with y/n you were hating...the hypocrisy

yourbff alexa play obsessed by mariah carey🥱

user OOP user the girls are fightingggg

user not even a y/n fan but this was a bit unnecessary...

user "you dont feel remorse, you dont feel the effects" 🫠

f1gossip

240,520 likes

f1gossip Despite hard launching their relationship just one week ago, Lando's new girlfriend has been spotted getting cozy with a different guy! The leaked pictures have already caused for her to go private on all social medias😬

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user karma is A GOD

user i know y/n is having a good day today

user omfg poor lando :(

user womp womp

user i bet he is regretting his decisions rn😭

user y/n nation won today, ln4 nation taking L after L

user we cant catch a break😩

user WHAT IS GOING ON WITH LANDO RN

user craziest winter break yet jeez

Instagram Messages

charles_leclerc hey y/n! i know we havent spoken much but ive seen how lando treated you the few times you were at races and i apologize for never speaking on it i just wanted to tell you you're a great person and your music is so amazing if you ever need anything please just shoot me a text!

landonorris y/n you blocked my number? im sorry about everything baby can we please just talk?

yourusername

liked by charles_leclerc, maxfewtrell and 4,204,214 others

yourusername im soooo sorry for your loss😊

my new single feather is out now!! special thanks to @charles_leclerc for helping me out in the music video, had so much making it <3

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user this mv was so hot omg

user I WAS NOT EXPECTING THIS BUT I LOVE

user i know a certain someone is FUMING

luisinhaoliveira99 on repeat already!!

yourusername 💋💋 user im convinced luisa reached out after she saw all the comparisons with her and y/n and they became besties user wait that makes so much sense

user f1 twitter is going insane rn

user Y/N NATION KEEPS WINNING

pietra.pilao AHH youre so talented bby liked by yourusername

charles_leclerc had the best time on set with you❤️

yourusername ❤️ user i ship it........

user i want them both

user ofc now shes going for another driver🙄

user oh you guys are OBSESSED with her, get a job user y/n still has them mad LOL

user l**** would never agree to anything like this

user im literally never getting over this, ive watched it 5 times in a row already

landonorris

liked by carlossainz55, maxfewtrell and 940,240 others

landonorris a toast to my real friends

view all comments

user if this is a charles sneak diss i will cry

user we got carlando content....but at what price

user oh he definitely got blocked by y/n😭

user dw we're on your side lando

user who is we?

user just take the L and move on bro

user the way 2 songs got everyone to switch up on lando HAHA

user not just that but his shady posts too

charles_leclerc posted a story

Replies

user the girls are OFFICIALLY fighting oh gosh

user next season is going to be interesting...

user my roman empire

user IS THIS A HARD LAUNCH???

user what is happening.

user PARENTS

[thornswoggled]

yori is fumiki and heres why: my manifesto

or: wait, we werent all on the same page about this?

i should have written this when i first read chapter 98, but im only getting around to it now. this is less me trying to convince you, the reader, and more hoarding all my collected thoughts on why yori is absolutely fumiki, if its a red herring its a silly one, and if he isnt or if its left ambiguous forever i will eat crow. here we go:

before i start let me say most of my evidence is the way yamazaki frames him visually rather than solid "proof." comics are an artform, theres a reason things get framed the way they do, and her artistic choices in ch 98 (i feel) are meant to serve as a big blinking neon light that says "you should be feeling this way about xyz right now"

iic, there were rumblings of "the young auditor" being fumiki as far back as his introduction in ch 51 due to to his unique ability:

which is essentially a refined version of fumikis innate ability to keep fae away. we know yori is part of a "family business," and it seems appropriate that with the proper training, he would be able to freeze fae in their tracks rather than simply ward them off

unfortunately this is where "evidence" ends and "vibes" begin

chapter 51 didnt get adapted into what was otherwise a pretty faithful adaptation in season 2, and i understand why - theres a lot going on, and this chapter is fairly out of left field. but theres one other quip that got left out of season 2:

this is a one-off thought that wouldnt have been difficult to include in the anime. imo, i believe this line from ch 62 didnt get animated because we hadnt met fumiki yet like we did in the manga. now, onto more recent chapters... (under a read more because this is going to get pretty long)

chise and yoris first meeting is framed in a very purposeful way. in chapter 98, elias is preoccupied with ousting all the outsiders so that he and chise can be alone, stuck on the idea that "christmas is for family only:"

and three pages later, who do we meet?

im really struck by the way chise and yori are drawn together here. personally, i dont read this as "chise is meeting a new unimportant side character," this is "the strings of fate have pulled us miraculously back together again"

waiter! waiter! can i get an order of drifting sakura petals and sparkles with this panel? am i waxing poetic here or do you see it? the way theres no background drawn here, no other characters, even in later pages when we know elias is standing right behind chise, he doesnt get included in frame so that its just the two of them:

while im at it, can we appreciate how theyre wearing the same outfit? black pants and a hip-length dark coat/sweater with oversized pockets, a collar, and six left-sided buttons. yoris dark gloves also evoke chises cursed arm here but i dont want to risk looking like a maniac any more than i already do. i mean... dude, look at them, theyre matching

speaking of matching, lets pop back to 51 for a sec

both yori and chise have canine familiars! actually, it looks like yori might have multiple - look at all those pokeballs i mean bamboo tubes in his coat. if my memory serves, we didnt know yori was japanese at this point, but everyone assumed so because of the appearance of this familiar... which was another log on the "this might be fumiki" fire

fun fact: this little dude is almost certainly a kuda-kitsune, which were said to be kept in tubes and summoned by a soothsayer, who could use it to perform curses, or tell the past and future

and the drama with which we find out his "name":

"i bet you were expecting me to say fumiki, huh. good luck im not giving you that this early you have to work for it." as far as aliases go, "ri" could be derived from "hatori," but neither of the kanji in "fumiki" can be read as "yo," so its probably just random

after yori leaves, we get another repetition of "christmas is for family," which at this point feels like yamazaki is leading us to water and dunking our head in it:

i think its awfully convenient that ruth was absent for chises exchange with yori. do you think he would have been able to smell that theyre related? or whiffed the kuda-kitsune in his coat?

right after this, too, we get this line from elias which i have been thinking about a lot:

theres a few different ways this could be read, so im not married to any one interpretation, but it could be foreshadowing "if chise decides to pursue a relationship with her estranged family, what will i do then?" as gabriella would say, "i hate to be a third wheel"

given what we have seen of yoris aloof personality, i have to imagine there will be drama if/when the reveal is made. sadly i can picture him actually pushing chise away if she tries to reestablish a relationship with him

now! that is pretty much where my thoughts end, but i do want to share questions/doubts i have:

if yori read all of simons reports to determine he was an unfit observer, there is no way he doesnt know chises full name. i wonder whether he had any reaction to it? he may assume that its just a coincidence. i briefly wondered if the hatori name was an invention by yuuki, until i remembered that the family chise stays with in the OVA also has the same name. unless yuuki was adopted by another family like seth...? dont mind me, im going pepe silvia mode over here

have i mentioned i talked about yuuki before in another theory post? take it with a grain of salt, i already got proven wrong on one front now that jasper has been introduced

will yuuki be reintroduced if fumiki is? i desperately want chise to get that closure, but this scene from ch 42 has a sense of finality to it, a sort of "you will never get to resolve things with your father or see his side of things" stank:

... actually, now that ive mentioned the kuda-kitsune, can we look at this thing again?

another word for the kuda-kitsune is "izuna," which is read in modern japanese as "weasel." could the critter whos watching yuuki here come from the same place as yoris familiars? yuuki leaves his family immediately after this - getting summoned maybe?

okay, okay, let me stop myself here before i start looking like im ranting and raving. can we talk about the mail, please, mac? ive been dying to talk about the mail with you all day, ok? "pepe silvia," this name keeps coming up over and over again. every day pepe's mail is getting sent back to me. pepe silvia! pepe silvia! i look in the mail, and this whole box is pepe silvia!

if youre a fence-sitter, what are your thoughts? do you think we just dont have enough evidence yet? inquiring minds want to know

[lesvegas]

man itd be so fucking easy to make the synth narrative in fo4 good if any writer at bethesda knew what the hell they were doing. higher ups at the institute could genuinely believe humanity would be better off if most ppl were artificial, efficient machines (if this is the real explanation its straight up not given anywhere in the game lol). maybe a twist is that most of these higher ups are synths themselves and either genuinely believe it (if theyre sentient) or are simply programmed to. also what if with high enough charisma/intelligence you could convince certain synths that theyre sentient/'alive' and make them either 1: stop supporting the institute because synth slavery bad OR 2: make them double down on supporting the institute because theyve essentially created life? also instead of making a synth version of 10 year old shaun to fuck w you what if they made a synth copy of the player (theyve been watching the player since theyve left the vault right) and this copy also fucks with you. but in a way that matters beyond 1 little scene. what if this copy fucked around in the world and people blamed its actions on you? how would they tell the difference, right? what if after dismissing some companions and re-recruiting them later there's a chance they've become a synth but neither of you would have any idea unless something specific happens? idk im just throwing shit at a wall to see what sticks but it already feels like im putting more thought into it than emil did lol

[trashworldblog]

i think the "nice doing business with you" line from the s5 finale is definitely going to have significance to season 6. there are too many examples of innocuous lines that end up being foreshadowing to overlook it. it's also a general rule of genies that they can't bring things back from the dead, so i think that's going to end up playing into whatever the "deal" with ryan was. the genie could've said it was against the rules to bring prof back, so ryan made another deal to get him back (1/2)

[i think there's also going to be a conflict with time travel in season 6. it's such an integral part of the show, and ryan definitely screwed the timeline by bringing prof and his family back. if we hadn't seen the article with the photo of the prof and his parents' fossils, then i would be a little less convinced of this, but because its explicitly shown onscreen, its very likely that something will go wrong with the timeline (2/2)

oh i also think that the substitute survived defenestration, but i think he's going to be a minor antagonist next season. just a nuisance, if you will. like yeah he's still a problem, but there are much bigger fish to fry than a 1'2" puppet hologram with an obsession with murder (3/3)]

...

sorry for taking so long!! this has been sitting in my drafts and ive been slowly pulling my thoughts together on this so its taken me some time!! (plus ive been chillin with the holidays and such) i appreciate this ask so much!

!disclaimer! i may accidentally pull from shane's commentary on the season finale on pateron. im doing my best not to because i know some people dont have access to patreon content. (plus its fun to make it more challenging) all puppet history lore is like marbles in my brain and its hard to separate what ideas came from where. im doin my best tho!

ok lets jump into it!

i am So. Curious. on how ryan and the genies whole deal is gonna shake out. was that it? will there be consequences? i have a feeling we'll be seeing some kind of fallout from this wish. it feels like they cut their conversation very short for a very specific reason. theres gotta be something going on there.

I think that ryan didnt *technically* wish the professor back to life, he just wished the professor back to the present. i also like the idea used in @ask-the-substitute that ryan used his 3 wishes to bring the professor back and thats how the profs mom and dad got to the present. its so perfect, i love it. just the idea of ryan thinking the first wish didnt work so then he tried again, and again. incredible.

i am curious if there is gonna be any time travel conflict! im not sure what that would look like (my brain kinda melts when it comes to timey wimey bullshit). honestly this is the part im the most unsure of. like theyre probably is consequences, but i dont even know where to start for what that would look like. i still like to think that the article showing the professor's family's bones just faded away like how people in photos did in back to the future.

the substitute ABSOLUTELY survived the defenestration!! watcher hq is one story and im slightly convinced the substitute cant die (unless we go by hot daga hologram logic, in that case you would need a witch and a volcano to kill most holograms [and i dont have a volcano handy])

i hope the substitute turns into either

1) a minor villan thats more annoying/funny then anything.

2) character redemption arc. we really like this funky guy and it would be cool to see him chill out with the stabby stabby. (just a little, he can stabby stabby as a treat)

now it would be REALLY FUNNY if the substitute did ad reads for future seasons Especially for nord vpn and other online security stuff.

i think the bigger fish to fry is gonna be those puppets trapped in the wonderium arena!! we gotta get them outta there and back into their earthly bodies!! how is that gonna happen??? god is asleep, the devil isnt gonna help, and neither is the genie. how the hell do you even get to a purgatory like that? dorthy ruth has moved on even though her husband isnt really dead!!!

what im really curious about for next season is

1) who is gonna be the musical guest. if the professor cant time travel, where is he gonna get his musical talents? will he reuse the substitutes tech to make guests?

2) any new stuff to go with our new professor??

3) are dino mom and dad gonna be involved? casually mentioned? i really hope a guest asks if the professor has a family just so that he can excitedly say "yes!! i do :D"

those are most of my thoughts going into s6! pretty excited to see what next season is going to look like! not sure if its gonna be lore heavy. ill be keeping an eye peeled for any hints 👀 either way, im excited to learn :)

[tigerdrop]

consider genderbent frenrey with me. please. yuri world. mentally ill pussy world

ive been really gripped with the idea of neither of them knowing the others a girl the whole time. on account of gordon freeman being "the player avatar" and benrey being "the ugly ass security guard model". like if we can say that dr coomer has been transgender the whole time then we can say that benreys been a he/him lesbian too. Whats it to ya

just think abt it. how much fun would it be if "gordon freeman" was a butch bitch who wanted to stream shit without people being weird so she never shows her face and gets Really into the role of gordon freeman to an unhealthy degree. canonically friendless gordon freewoman who wants to be known for being Funny instead of for being a Gamer Girl

personally. i think it would be cool if she was on that low dose T type shit. but a voice changer could do the trick too

consider how fucking insanely mindblowingly angry she would be if she found out that benrey was a girl too and every other member of the science team knew the whole time and treats her like an idiot. im going to quote my girlfriend bc she makes my ideas funnier than i do

and benrey would be fuckin sulky about it! gordon had him fooled too! where does she get off being so mad at him!

(sorry if the pronouns make this look straight to the viewers. He has a cyberpussy. which would also piss gordon off bc how does it even work when benreys a fucking video game character and doesnt even have junk. where does he get off having gender complexity)

its literally so funny to me that benrey would have interiority just to make gordon mad. this is true in any universe tbh

imagine a version of hlvrai where the player was streaming. like sorry i have to out myself real quick to argue with the computer. but her chats convinced that she just came out as a trans girl and theyre being very supportive . What does she even do now

ok. now that the preambles out of the way. the justification. i have to expound on some other thigns. In my mind she has a shitty ponytail and takes up wearing glasses and ties to look more like gordon freeman bc shes a freak. but she was already a "collared shirts and mens pants" type so its less weird than it possibly could be. "im just like him fr" says hikikomori lesbian who dropped out of college and has worn the same shirt for 4 days

shes the kind of person who gets really mad about "gamer girls" ruining her legitimacy as a "Girl Gamer". reach back in your mind to 2010 with me.......shes not like the other girls. shes not into dresses and makeup. shes into call of duty and esoteric energy drinks. she has something to fucking prove . undeserved sense of superiority ass

basically shes the exact same but with the extra layer of hyper-online gamer girl lesbian loneliness. a different take on the root of gordons friendlessness and lack of tact and bossy bitch attitude

youre getting the picture. now imagine if she reluctantly fell for the AI that became her best friend. Youre seeing

i think that benrey would still be into flirting with her and fucking with her when shes presenting as Gordon Freeman but with more of a jokey "i am baiting you into being homophobic" edge to it. and it would get weirdly intense after he finds out that gordons a girl too .

so its still got the same edge but i think he would start to develop real honest to god Feelings. the kind that makes him all sulky and jealous and needy

and at the same time gordons like. weirdly obsessed with benrey in the same way but in a way that kind of grosses herself out. like…….she wants so bad to have people take her seriously and respect her and especially so for dudes. as nearly anybody whos ever been "the single girl in a nerdy dude friend group" can attest to

does she have a crush on a fucking AI? or does she really want "the funny guy who pays lots of attention to her when shes playing A Guy" to be her friend without gender getting in the way?? who fucking knows. Or at least thats what she thinks until the big reveal

imagine gordon freedyke having an insane sex dream about benrey for the first time like the fucking day she realizes hes not actually a dude. I think she would develop a mental illness

hell honestly u could throw in some sexuality crisis stuff too. for fun. didnt exactly think she had a preference and didnt have enough self esteem to think it would ever matter. like at some vague point in the distant future shed have to find some tolerable guy to settle down with and go thru the motions. at least just to get family members off her case about "being 27 and having no real job or boyfriend or friends in general" and then benrey appear

itd be all the more embarrassing bc theres no getting around the fact that benreys model looks Like That. in this scenario there is no real sex appeal. but What If you were desperate and lonely and the person that talks to you the most is a video game character who is suddenly insistent that theres a girl under all the shitty textures. sure hes like polygons or whatever but hes also - theoretically, in the landscape of a repressed lesbian mind - a short and scrawny butch dyke with his hair cropped short and a snappy security outfit and bags under his eyes. and shes a pathetic bottom bitch who really likes being teased and has a bad habit of just blurting out her kinks in jokes

and benreys her best friend :) buddyyyy

shed be so mad at herself. like. even she is aware that this is a new low. but she cant stop herself from jacking off to the butch in her computer. "if he was real i would fuck him" turned very quickly in her mind to "if he could see this he would want to fuck me" turned to cum explosion

now consider how insane it would be if dyke benrey was calling her "dirty girl" in act 3 . if he were like a normal guy it would make her throw up. but shes imagining small tits and a tucked in collared shirt under his security vest and developing covid in real time

also you have to imagine that she starts to refer to herself as "gordon" outside the game too. on account of the mental illness.

its awesomefor lesbians to have guy names of course but consider: what if her last name was already "freeman" but her parents thought they were so fucking funny naming her "morgan". And she has to live with that every day of her life. "gordon" sounds close enough that she can respond to it without batting an eyelash and also doesnt embarrass her into the dirt

Anyway. See ya

frenrey yuri

[homosexualmorelikehomiesexual]

god im going insane about Rango again

why does his shirt change patterns with his scales in the scene where hes camouflaging himself from the hawk unless the shirt isnt real. why. because if the shirt isnt real then none of the clothes are real. neither is the glass of water he has in the beginning. clearly not, bc theyre in obvious contrast to the awkwardly overlarge human items that were purposefully put into his tank- the barbie torso, the windup toy, the toothpick sword.

so if all the items that are to scale for him arent real, theyre just figments of his imagination as he struggled to cope with isolation via the fantasy that hes an actor..what about the town? what about the other characters? is he just fully imagining them too? are they real, but theyre all just normal animals in the desert and hes just continuing his wild west fantasy because hes ultimately a very lonely lizard?8 why are nome of the animals really to scale? why is there a random animal from madacasgar? do wild west towns just...have exchange students?? how does a poorly taken care of pet chameleon know what any of this is? how does Rango have a maiden name if he isnt trans??? why the Fuck did his owners think it was a good idea to strap a 5gal fish tank containing a live chameleon onto the back of a van going 90mph through death valley. why is the golf scene with the villain done with live pillbugs as golf balls instead of scaled down golf balls to match the golf clubs unless its a deliberate parallel to the croquet scene with the queen of hearts in alice in wonderland. how did rattlesnake jake get a gatling gun for a tail how does it Function. how the fuck does he reload it he has no hands. why does Beans know what andromeda 5 is and why is it so heartbreaking that shes utterly convinced her father was kidnapped by aliens instead if accepting that hes dead. why do they have some items to scale like the golf clubs and the glass of water but in the campfire scene when they say pass the beans its a SINGULAR KIDNEY BEAN THE SIZE OF THEIR HEADS. are lizards really that small. is Spoons bisexual. what the fuck is even Happening with the scale. are they even Real oh god im losing my mind

[larrythefloridaman]

Been rewatching bits and pieces of cpuk season one for fun and taking notes of funny stuff we dont talk about much in the discord and thinking abt it in the context of later seasons/information and its very fun. This is stuff from 1-5 (will likely update as i get further in this partial rewatch, under readmore for spoilers of later parts of the series and keeping the post short)

Hamhel and dadondorf apparently taught jimbo 'butt/butts' is a swear word but 'fuck' isnt. Jimbo is really interested in music as we know but also distinctly very bad at it. Jimbo's biological parents are dead, but left him a LOT of money and as a result spending too much money on shit he doesn't need became his favorite coping mechanism and, following the divorce, he used up all of his inheritance money and started dipping into the family funds, which is when Dadon and him start having Problems. Jimbo is extremely hamhel's kid neither of them should be trusted with any kind of power. Jimbo, i know you've been through a lot and the dad that was demonstrably better at connecting with you is being Fucked Up And Evil Right Now but honey, the shopping addiction is not gonna make your life any stabler. listen to zzzzzzoey. go to therapy. 'Jimbo tried to summon satan to kill his dad' is a thing thats said. Which. gestures in crimson's general direction. funny. Jimbo is peak 'remember when you were 15 and convinced you were evil and irredeemable but really you were just 15' except at this point hes like, 13 max im pretty sure and also hes Really stupid (affectionate.) (CPUK1)

Dadondorf is personal friends with Cranky Kong. Hamhel claims he threw a match in winners finals against Dad to give him a fighting chance and I think he's full of shit as ever <3 Dadondorf to Jimbo: "I'm sorry, It's just- I know you miss your other dad, but we'll get through this together." bro dont talk to me about to wring hamhel's dumbass neck, you dumb son of a bitch meat man abandoning your family for demonic power to recapture your glory days im gonna KILL Y- hes better now its fine im fine theyre fine. man imagining what the winners finals and championship match between dadon and hamhel at the end of cpuk1 would be like with season 2-3 style voiceacted storytelling has me fucked up. itd kill me i think .

Zzzzzoey's apparently like. 18 years old in cpuk1????? If thats still canonical shes in her fuckin. early 20s now. what the Fuck. more like a cool big sister to Jimbo convincing him to go to therapy and helping him reconcile with his dad like that than a peer. (CPUK1)

Patchman apparently worships some kind of obscure scarecrow harvest god called Scarny, and either his ratspeak was kind of rusty or he genuinely briefly forgot what science was because when he called Zapmouse the work of the devil and Zapmouse corrected him by saying he was a product of science he said he didnt believe in scientology. Zapmouse is explicitly an atheist. Zapmouse also likes to use elaborate threats to get his point across. Zapmouse ended a friendship and threatened to rip out a person's teeth for patronizing him by calling him their pet to explain why they were talking to a rat. (CPUK2)

Grundy, the Grunk's brother, has a confirmed skin, he's represented by the green bowser when they talk about him during the Grunk's intro! He and the Grunk lived in Tennessee, and he's a famous and respected restauranteur specialized in Southern Comfort Food whose critical opinion is so highly respected a bad yelp review from him can tank businesses. He, and I quote, 'sucks.' they talk about grundy so much in the grunk's debut episode it's kinda funny that he's never shown up. They even raise the idea of introducing him as a fighter at some point. although considering his brother died being part of kerfuffle and then he kept doing it and let his son participate too, i dont blame him for not wanting to get involved. People apparently start beef with the Grunk sometimes just for being related to Grundy, considering sauceboss. maybe they just don't. talk anymore. (CPUK4)

Home MD really likes fish and cares about the ocean as an environment, Alfred even throwing out the idea that he wears black in grim remembrance of the Mozilla Oil Spill. i wonder if this interest was present before the time loop or if it developed during. What im asking is what came first hackshifter aquarium dates or home md getting just like really into maintaining his doctors office fish tank as a coping mechanism. Did Larry frequently get into physical altercations with litterers at the beach growing up or is that new. They say Home MD saw Finding Dory and cried. they also, unrelated, say Home is so old he canonically uses internet explorer. Fucking mean to him!!! he's like 25ish at this point in the loop! I know he has the exhaustion in his eyes of a man twice that age but leave him alone!!!!!!! (CPUK4) (Sidenote its so fucking funny to me that even during the home timeloop larry was picking fights with hamhel. He wants to kick that old mans ass so bad but it'll never happen. I think larry greets hamhel every time they meet by trying to put him in a headlock and casually failing. Their weird frenemy relationship is so funny to me)

Firefox is a Mega-Corporation that has its fingers in lots of things, the browser's just the main thing they do. So in the kerfuffleverse mozilla as a company is kinda like google as a company is in the real world. Mozillas dead as hell and Nightly hates his ass and has understandably complicated feelings about family but it's unclear in my memory if he's still like, involved with the company or the rest of his family in any way. Is nightly a disowned out of touch ex-richboy or what (CPUK4)

it is funny that the lowkey bloodlust has been whats stuck about Corn most into the present from her debut. Alfred: "corn really just put a knife to this man's (home md) neck and said 'i'm here to take your blood.'" She craves violence and always has and i respect it (CPUK4)

ICEE was a huge superfan of ICEE who got sponsored as a result of him promoting the brand through his very public love of it abd as such has some amount of unofficial pull with the company. Spriteman is not sponsored. The coca cola company does not want to be associated with Spriteman in any way, shape, or form. his sheer violent feverish devotion to that citrus soft drink is completely fucking unmarketable to them. If cpu kerfuffle wasn't distinctly unaffected by the law he'd probably be getting sued for so aggressively stanning their product in such an intensely unflattering way on a public platform. Also christ in a clown car he was stuck perfect for SO LONG he went perfect between cpuk3 and cpuk4, and didn't recover until cpuk20. This man was in a feral state and not fully in control of himself for a bit under 2 years i think? he is So rusty at being a human. In the first episode he was 'Perfect,' he seemed fairly lucid, which is. Upsetting. because it implies that he slowly lost that lucidity until he was the 's-sprite' stammering beast he was by the time g2 rolled in. 

Yung Papaya's snake exorcist dad was described as being half demon before becoming a snake, and his name is actually Rod. These are some of the only things the snake priest dad remembers from his life before being transformed into a snake aside from his work as an exorcist. I have no additional commentary on this i just think its funny (CPUK5)

The Light Void is, apparently, a void of pure light and an entity that instead of consuming or encompassing things as one might imagine the maw of the void to do, allows things to take of it whatevers needed that it can give. a sort of metaphysical wellspring hammerspace of potential, it sounds like. One of the many odd, complex and multifaceted world-crafting forms of Spectrum's divinity, perhaps? its emissary, corrupted into the cbt demon, is described as having little sentience/autonomy to begin with, so it's tricky to exorcise because it lacks much of a will of its own to free, and doesn't have the capacity to desire to be freed, as it exists to serve whatever purpose its needed for. It can only speak occasionally, and it's very direct and lacks personality. (CPUK5)

In CPUK5's intros, ryan says dan is a geeksquad employee that was Sent Into The Game. Like A Normal Guy From Real Life Literally Sent Into The Video Game. Its compared repeatedly to scooby doo cyberchase. nccts stuff clarifies this is arguably pretty normal for the fighters origins but Dan was literally intentionally isekai'd here from Normal Actual Real Life to help try to deal with hamburger helper. Every Dan Is Explicitly From Another World. Also he seemed like he was having so much genuine fun fighting Al compared to his whole Comedically Tired Cosmically Tormented Everyman thing hes got going on now and also for like the whole rest of his time in even this tournament. Also apparently he fixed icee's ipod once and returned it and all the music was gone except 15 copies of ice ice baby with one under pressure. blows kiss love u dan <3

Alfred: "Alabaster Uppercut has been fighting for 27 years, and dedicated the other two to teaching children how to do the uppercut just like him" oh my god was Al already like 29 when cpuk5 happened. Is Al in his early thirties now. Also he says Al was already very respected and well-known in his home village and he was once ideologically pacifist and only signed up for cpuk because a group of other competitors viciously defamed him and his village and called him a pussy on social media and one of the village kids started getting bullied over it and that's what crossed a line with him, which is interesting. Ya boy loves the fight for the sake of the fun of the fight now but he supposedly used to Very Much Not Like Fighting Pointlessly At All? Originally more of a 'practices a martial art as a meditation and preservation of heritage' kind of guy before discovering The Joys Of Consensual Sportsman's Violence

[emetkoto]

good day mimi do you have any underrated emetkoto moments or little obscure facts you'd like to share? :3

okok im gonna use this opportunity to try and explain that little moment i was having trouble putting into a post bc it was just so small it wasnt working but like. in my head. i have this idea right.

yknow when you find emet-selch in the capital building in the tempest before the amaurot dungeon? i was thinking about how when they get there k'oto calls out to him but instead of using his little nickname for him (just emet) that hes always used he uses his full title for once and emet selch does a little double take and snaps back like "oh, not on a first name basis anymore are we?" or smth along those lines...its such a little thing but its just one of those things that makes go hHOOH every time ithink about it...k'oto trying to show respect in a desperate attempt to get him to listen to reason and just talk to him and emet selch weaponizing it trying to poke and prod and provoke him so they can fight and get it over with before he has to think about it anymore......weehee and by weehee i mean (SOBS)

The first time he calls him with no intention of banging him too is great emet selch tries to go through the motions as usual but k'oto is like 'hey can we just hang out actually' and emets like '?????? you want me to just stay here and do nothing????' and god he has complaints about it but he does it anyway even though he absolutely does not have to and can leave any time :) its almost like he wants to spend time with him or smth smh...he just chills in the corner whole k'oto does whatever, eating dinner, writing in his journal, polishing his weapons etc etc...the whole time huffing and puffing and occasionally complaining but also slowly inching closer and closer without even realizing it and helping him with things like cleaning up dinner and folding his clothes and such...by the end of the night theyre chilling on the sofa together reading a book and neither of them have even realized whats happened...k'oto falls asleep leaning on emet selch and thats when hes like 'ah shit. what the hell. im enjoying myself too much.' and tucks the catboy in before ditching 🥺

in kind of the same vein the first time k'oto wakes up and emet selch is still there cuddling him makes me feel feral to think about just.....ough at that time emet selch had started staying to cuddle after hours but he was always gone by the time k'oto woke up (or at the very least not in bed with him, possibly chilling at the table fully dressed waiting for him to wake up or smth) so waking up in his arms for the first time was just. magical :,) it was the first time he'd gotten to see him sleeping too upto that point he wasnt convinced that emet selch ever DID sleep outside of his 100+ year naps and it surprised him so much the dumbass was like ?! and woke him up like 'youre still here?????' and emet just kinda pulled him back down and was like 'be quiet and enjoy the peace before your friends show up' and so,,,,he did!! they both did....and from then on they always woke up together :,)

they wedding is extremely underrated only bc every time i try to talk about it i feel like im going to blow up and explode everywhere and die it makes me so happy so ive had. a very hard time making posts about it bc its just. so good. so very very very good someday i swear to christ ill finish that essay answer i owe it just makes me feel SO MUCH you get it. you understand me. as we've established you all comprehend my thoughts and feelings

these are just a bunch of jumbled separate thoughts so i might as well embrace that and keep going with it and go off about their pet names now bc i love them...obviously k'otos nickname for him is just. emet without the selch and at first it kind of annoys him like thats a big important title that was given to him and it seemed like the catboy was making a mockery of him but he kinda grows to like it as he gets to know k'oto bc like...yeah nobody ever called him that in his whole life not even apollo or hyth and it was strangely nice...probably my least in character emet selch thing i write for them but i stand by it :) i have more cringe things i could say about that but anyway. emet selch starts out just calling k'oto Hero (derogatory) ofc but as it goes on he throws in some other stuff like 'my dear' (also derogatory at the time) 'my dear hero' etc etc until they actually. yknow. start being together and then those 'dear's become more affectionate and he throws in some other stuff like 'my sweet' 'beloved' etc etc :,) never his name though...not until he drags him to the tempest to marry him and after that he erases his memories of it and doesnt do it again till ultima thule so </3 men will literally call each other 'love' and still run away at the slightest implication that theyre maybe madly in love. how embarrassing for them

[ot3]

Same anon as a second ago who was asking about Han suyeong and orv - or if you have any headcanons about yoohankim I think they’re neat

yesss lets talk about yoohankim

all i want for them after the epilogues is to write a book together. like kdj is already long overdue for beta-reading and yjh has been tricked into being an editor once and can be tricked into doing it again. any chance to correct these miserable shrews he lives with <333333 

but the thing is like hsy like completely wrung herself out writing ORV and now she wants to do something the complete fucking opposite she’s like guys. i’m sick the death of fucking themes and catharsis and shit. we’re writing slice of life. give me ideas what’s some stuff that people do

and yjh was like i dont fucking know what anyone does in their spare time.

and kdj is like. i also don’t know anything that people do. hope this helps.

and hsy is like god damn it. me neither. oh my god we are so bad at this. 

this is all definitely pre relationship because theyre stupid enough to rewrite time and space for each other but still try and friendzone about it. “yeah they threw themselves headfirst into the spokes of fate’s wheels and doomed countless lives in countless worlds just so all of us could meet, again and again, but, like. what if i’m reading too much into things?”

absolute incompetence. 

anyway hsy just starts working tossing in whatever sort of contrived high school hijinks she can think of and bouncing off yjh and kdj as sounding boards, reading them snippets of her drafts, and eventually they just end up just essentially co-authoring it with how much of the plot and character theyre giving her, theyre doing everything she’s doing except typing the damn thing up.

only at this point it’s really just a weird tangential larp of them all deciding what they imagine a fun childhood would have theoretically been like and not so subtly just making these characters live it out on their behalf. yjh still feels pretty weird about writing stuff that didn’t already happen for obvious reasons but hsy is like ‘stop being fucking paranoid this is so different this is made up for real’ and kdj is like ‘im abstaining from this conversation’ and yjh is like well i guess im probably safe from any cosmic comeuppance as long as this is a happy story. so it really is just like peak good feeling slice of life antics the whole way through

anyway obviously the main characters are Very Poorly Concealed Yoohankim Expys. i say poorly concealed but that’s onyl to people who arent them. yhk themselves are VERY convinced these are extremely original and compelling characters. 

it doesn’t hit until after they write some shit where hsy has to be like ‘look this is so stupid there’s no reason these people wouldn’t have gotten together yet in this situation how can we work with such a flimsy premise of miscommunicated feelings. surely they have to know theyre in love.’

and then she’s like [brain loading symbol] oh fuck oh fuck oh fuck

and theyre like What stop being dramatic and just fucking tell us.

and shes like ‘ive figured it out im the sexiest and smartest woman alive. you guys are gonna love this’ 

and theyre like just fucking tell us we hate you so bad you act like this every time

and she’s like we need to kiss. ohhh i am so smart. 

and theyre like [dial up modem noises] oh god wait we are supid and embarrassing motherfuckers huh. wow. 

and then they kiss

[bee-calm]

Aaaaaaah love me new to the tbhk Fandom! Jfjfjes I wanted to know ur opinions on a few ships I'd that's ok! Ehehe so the first one is hananene, I really like the ship it's cute! And the second is aoinene! Oh man that one's my other djfjfkelrkkfsjf

2/2 SAmE ANON WHO ASKED ABOUT HANANENE AND AOINENE I HAD A TYPO FRICK I MEANT TO SAY AOINENE IS MY OTHER OOPS THAT IS ALL BYEEE 

hi anon !! as usual this is probably gonna get pretty long so i apologise in advance hhdgdhd

so this is the part where i get cancelled because i have to admit that i don’t really care about hananene all that much- i don’t dislike it or have anything against it!! it just doesn’t interest me that much personally, and i kind of prefer the idea of a platonic relationship between them (give me chaotic bi best friends rn). one thing i will say about them is that they need to have a serious talk at some point about this thing hanako does where he assumes what nene wants instead of actually just asking her- bc he’s made some pretty terrible decisions because of it and still doesn’t really seem to acknowledge that it’s maybe a bad thing to do. im very much rooting for nene to yell at him once the current arc has been resolved bc he kind of deserves it. anyway, i can definitely see the appeal, its the Main Ship for a reason, but it just doesn’t particularly get me, you know?? 

i dont think its any secret that aoinene is one of my favourite tbhk ships- one of my favourite ships full stop, even. you look inside my brain and it’s just full of aoinene thoughts 24/7. nothing else in there. i think my favourite thing about them is the fact that they can be cute friends-to-lovers who garden together and probably wrote letters to each other when they were kids, but they can also be super complex and painful (while still having the potential to work things out eventually.)  aoi and nene are both characters who have been lying to each other since the beginning of the series- nene has been keeping the supernatural stuff from aoi to the point that aoi was convinced nene hated her and was avoiding her, and aoi has been putting on a fake personality in order to fit in, and never mentioned it until she felt lost enough to want to disappear into the far shore. again theyre another two that have a LOT to talk about after this arc, and i very much hope that aidairo don’t skip over the the struggles they’re probably going to have to go through to repair their relationship. i guess the thing that really gets me about aoinene is the fact that neither of them are in the right, but nothing they’ve done is irreparable either- it might take a bit of work to fix things, but that sort of,, potential for growth is something that i really enjoy. i definitely prefer ships like that where both characters are a bit flawed bc it just makes it feel way more human despite this, aoi + nene do still clearly care about each other though!! (i will gladly fight anyone who thinks aoi doesnt care about nene.) some of the times nene has looked most distressed have been when aoi is in danger, and aoi openly worries about nene doing strange stuff by herself- and she looks up rumours and scary stories to tell her bc she knows nene enjoys them !! (also you cant tell me that aoi’s ‘i missed my chance to tell her’ didn’t seem at least a little bit romantic) i should probably stop here but aoinene has pretty much every single one of my favourite tropes, they can be super sweet while also having the potential for a lot of depth, and man i just want them to talk things out and start being more honest with each other,,

[strawberrymilkshakeearrings]

hey guys theres a lot of misinformation being spread about the protests so just keep in mind:

- be SUPER skeptical of any claims that an "organization" is paying one side or the other to do something. ive seen posts claiming the media "paid" a white woman to pretend to be floyd's wife on TV. ive seen facebook posts claiming that antifa is "paying" protesters to come into cities and loot stuff. neither of these are true (the first is blatantly false and the second has no proof)

- be wary of videos that blame one side or the other if the people in them are not immediately identifiable. its really easy to claim that a person with no identifiable clothes hitting someone else or burning things is a "protester" or "undercover cop". dont always trust the original poster to correctly identify the people in a video

- be wary of videos that start halfway through a conflict. its easy to claim that Side A or Side B started a fight. and remember that protests are big, chaotic events. its easy to miss the true instigating event - so be wary of claims that cops or protesters "retaliated without being provoked". not saying its not happening but be very wary

- do your research and make sure that places asking for money are legit.

- be wary of posts or videos that seem...designes to grab your attention. text on plain simple backgrounds, posts that use excessive emojis, POSTS with lots of CAPS, designed to easily grab the users attention and spread or simplify a message. a lot of those posts are legitimate but a lot of them are designed to be easy to share and quick to draw views without much scrutiny

- does the post in question fit into a narrative suspiciously well? a cop pepper spraying a protester who was "protesting peacefully", a protester who spray painted "fuck cops" and shot someone, etc. pay attention; be suspicious if a story seems predesigned to provoke outrage. there are plenty of real incidents happening, im not trying to pretend otherwise. but be careful not to let others take advantage of your expectations

- check the accounts of OP accounts posting inflammatory or extreme ideas. cops talking about shooting protesters, protesters talking about looting and burning - is the blog a real person? do they post about things that arent politics? is the blog relatively new? does the blog post exclusively inflammatory content designed to manipulate high emotions? make sure its a real person making those posts

- use common sense and compassion. its easy to slip into the narrative that all cops are evil or all protesters are violent looters. think about your mom, your friends, your teachers - i am not trying to downplay the seriousness of the situation or imply that either side is free of guilt or even that both sides are equally complicent. what im saying is that both sides are made up of people who have doubts and fears and passions. and neither side is a monolithic stormtrooper/faceless bad guy hell bent on promoting chaos. anyone who tries to convince you otherwise should be regarded with intense suspicion. anyone who tries to convince you that the other side isnt human has an agenda theyre trying to push. you can criticize a group and their actions without stripping them of their humanity.

[mountain-of-divine-fire]

Crystal spirits, and how i work with them

Disclaimer. this is all my personal experience and beliefs. though this post is educational, take from it only what you believe. my word isnt the authority and neither is any other blog post. 

In my experience with crystals throughout the years, ive learned many things about them. i hope this post will help yall out there, who are maybe beginners, or just curious on how some things work, or how others like to do things. 

This post does not list crystal correspondences.

This will be a bit rambly, but i hope you get what i mean~

Obtaining your friends

Couple of options for this, i would suggest going rock hounding in a local area. Bring your companions, water, and your tools.

Maybe youre in a place with slim pickings,like me. you can just buy some online or in person

Crystal shopping online seems more convenient since you can look everywhere for whatever you want, and get to compare prices.But physical crystal shops are great because you can tell by feel who wants to come home with you. 

honestly, i believe nothing happens to a crystal that it doesnt want to happen. and if it does, it will end up fixing it itself. If you get a crystal that doesnt feel right, you will know who to give it to.

Im in the crystal shop. Now what? Well, just take a look around! see what catches your eye.I like to have a very loose suggestion of a shopping list, but it usually gets thrown out the window. If you feel like you need to touch something, do it. (unless the shop says no touchy ofc). Some things will practically jump out at you and scream “TAKE ME WITH YOU”. If you dont find something that really yells at you, and you still want to bring something home, just find something pretty. 

 How crystal spirits work

This is mostly based on what ive experienced. this doesnt come from any specific belief , but it does align with how some people practice animism. 

(much like in steven universe,if i had to give an example,) Crystals pop out of the ground, knowing who they are and what they do.They may grow and change with their experiences, but mostly, they know what theyre about. They are given energy and life by the earth, and they do their job. 

Each crystal group, species, and individual type seem to have overarching personality traits and a group spirit. i think some folk call these “crystal devas” but im not entirely sure where that comes from and what that entails. also each vein, and individual piece, has their own spirit and personality, say, beryl and quartz are completely different. An amethyst and a rose quartz are both quartz, and therefore have a similar type of personality, but are different. Each amethyst also has its specific differences. A chevron would be different from a grape jelly. Two individuals broken off from the same cluster would be different but similar, and so would each half of a broken slab.

sometimes individuals have names, and sometimes they can be named by you. some like to work with each other, and some prefer to work alone. 

Each crystal has correspondences , but sometimes those general guidelines can be deviated from, simple because the individual just doesnt do that kind of thing. 

My crystal broke! what happens then? Well, now you have two friends to work with. Some folk like to keep one half and give the other to a friend, some keep both halves and glue them back together with super glue (i do this with show pieces), and some folk like to bury them and return them back to the earth. You dont have to get rid of your broken pieces if you dont feel like its time. The crystal will let you know

How crystal spirits communicate

Most of the time, unless youre just really closed off, you will just feel it. They usually speak in feelings. if one wants to come with you for the day, you will know. If one wants anything , youre gonna know it. Dont second guess yourself, and just do it on impulse, pretty much.

These spirits are from nature, and are usually not relatable to humans (theres exceptions to this, like lab made crystals, and carved skulls, more on that later.).  they can and will communicate in ways youre not familiar to, if you dont do spirit work.If a crystal tells you its name, like its TRUE name, you might not even be able to comprehend the words its throwing at you. dont try to decipher it, just let it be. also , try to keep true names secret unless they tell you otherwise. 

If you cant really feel what they try to communicate, you could also meditate. If they want to say anything at least. just get cozy and meditate as you usually would, once you get good and calm just hold a rock and sit with it for a bit. Usually this type of communication is more in detail, maybe fully formed thoughts and sentences, maybe images. Once i even got one that liked to speak through song lyrics!

If you cant do these, use a pendulum! Ask the pendulum where its yes is, and where its no is. (for me usually, non human or complex spirits like to go left and right for yes, and forward and back for no. for animal spirits and servitors, ive found usually they nod yes and shake no. not sure how plants respond just yet.)

Ask it some troubleshooting questions first like “are you an amethyst, are my eyes blue, do i live at XYZ” ect... 

A problem with pendulums is, if you try and use a crystal pendulum when working with any other spirit, the crystal itself may respond. Always ask if youre talking to the right entity.

What might a crystal communicate to me? It could be something as simple as “my name is  ⌷ ⌷ ⌷ ⌷ ⌷ ⌷ “ or   “you like to smoke cleanse usually, but i would specifically like sunlight ”, or it could be advice about a situation that you need help with. 

Can these spirits be malevolent?  personally, no. i dont think so. though it can be a grey area. most nature spirits want nothing but the greater good for themselves, nature, and maybe even you, if youre a good person in its eyes. 

there are instances where a crystal could be “angry”, maybe because the way it was obtained, or that it holds some kind of curse/hex/negative energy (maybe just even being around something awful that happened). Usually cleansing a stone will help with this. And if it doesnt? Try and see if you can do anything for it. 

Be careful about crystal runes, as you can piss them off. ive made a few mistakes in my time working with them(and by a few i mean a LOT, its not fun), in general just dont be a dick, and dont ask for things youre not ready to know the answer to. always thank them for cooperating, and cleanse them after use. 

What are the effects of this? for me, it was like a terrible panic attack, i was suffocating, my heart was going nuts, it was so hot, and i was so dry mouthed. i have never had panic attacks that bad. Tried to use some quartz crystals to ground myself, since i knew it was an attack, and they broke in half in the middle. This is completely my fault. I got scared and locked my runes away because it told me something i wasnt ready for, the next time i busted them out (and i hadnt thanked or cleansed them since,) is when they decided to teach me that lesson.. i was new at magic and stupid. and im glad my first big mistake was with something this forgiving. You probably wont ever have to deal with something like this if youre generally respectful. please learn from my mistakes. 

As with any divination and spirit work, you need to take protective measures. when youre speaking to a crystal spirit, you may actually be talking with something else. and it could be negative. use your best judgement please. 

Whats up with cleansing/charging/ect..?

 a lot of folk like to fight over whether or not you need to charge, cleanse, and bless or whatever else you need to do to crystals. Personally,i do like to cleanse crystals after heavy use, spellwork, or when i first get them from a shop. just to get rid of residual negativity. 

Crystals can hold information, but as far as charging them, im not so convinced. crystals arent a sigil, or something you made yourself. it has its own energy from the earth and its spirit, and will work perfectly fine without any of that.  Only do what you feel is necessary 

If its fine without charging, then why cleanse?  other than getting rid of stored negative energy, its just a nice thing to do every once and a while. It sort of works like an offering. showing that you respect the entity and want to work together in a mutual relationship. if you keep up your end as a guardian, then it will help you. 

How do i use crystals in spellwork and every day life? 

well heres some ideas! 

carry some around in your pockets/bag/bra/whatever according to whoever wants to come with you , and crystal associations

Gridwork. make a crystal grid

In spell jars/bottles/satchets 

As a decoration in your house to give the space a certain mood, feeling, or help. 

In meditation, to give advice perhaps, but also to help you according to its correspondences 

In divination, as help. 

As vessels for spells, enchantments, servitors, and whatever else (always ask it first!!! im using a large quartz as an astral tether, and a smaller one to house a servitor) 

As a friend. ever heard of pet rocks? well this is just an aesthetic step up from that. 

in your plant pots, to help them grow and thrive (be careful about water solubility) 

Pain relief and healing (only do this in congruence with actual medical care! keep around a fluorite for sinus issues, but definitely take your cold medicine) 

Important notes~

 As with any spirit, treat your crystals with respect. especially since theyre gifts from the earth. Dont act like you own a crystal. Like a piece of the earth, we really dont own land either. You arent its master and it doesnt have to do what you say. when you buy a crystal, youre pretty much signing up to be its guardian, and adding it to your team. be good to the earth, and to your friends, and a crystal will be good to you. 

if you have suggestions on other ways to work with crystals, comment! I hope this post was informational and not a complete rambling mess. have fun working with your rocks, yall~. Post about crystal skulls coming soon.  

Admin Fifa~

[rosepetalmark]

Not in the Stars

2.5k words

Renjun x Reader

warnings: alcohol mention

in which you plan to confess your love for your best friend to him at a party, but the universe has other plans in store for the both of you. 

You like Renjun. A lot. 

That was one sentence in your five years of friendship with Huang Renjun that you never thought you’d say to yourself, let alone admit to. 

You don’t know where these feelings came from, but all you know is that they’re strong and on your mind twenty four seven. Everything he says and does captivates your mind, causing your feelings for him to grow even stronger.

It’s as if these feelings for him suddenly hit you like a brick one day. You were strictly best friends last week, and now you have these unexplainable deep feelings for him, eating you alive and begging for you to confess to him.

It’s not that you’re opposed to dating Renjun, it’s just that he’s been your best friend for several years and he means so incredibly much to you. You just don’t want to risk losing him or making things between you two weird if he doesn’t feel the same. 

So you suppress your feelings. As long as you have Renjun as your best friend, that’s all that matters, right?

Jaemin always makes you second guess yourself, explaining that the dynamic duo that you and Renjun are would be ten times more incredible if you were dating. Since you’re already best friends and know everything about each other, why not date? Only bigger and better things can come from it he always says.

Although Jaemin makes strong points, you’re still scared Renjun will turn you away, mainly because you’re ninety nine percent certain that he only views you as a friend, nothing more and nothing less. 

Yeah you have sleepovers  and spend hours late at night talking on the phone with one another, but that’s what best friends do. If Huang Renjun has any feelings for you, you’re sure someone would have said something by now. 

You get the typical stares from old people when you make your daily trek to school in the morning, him waiting outside your house for you at exactly seven forty two, smiling so bright the second you walk out your front door.  

You constantly get mistaken as his girlfriend whenever you go out together on the weekend, which always causes a deep pink blush to appear on Renjun’s cheeks. He’s always quick to brush it off though, making it clear to everyone around you that you’re strictly best friends, and that neither of you view each other in that way. 

Boy is he wrong.

Everything about Renjun makes your heart flutter, and that’s something that scares you.

For starters, he excels so well in school. For someone who spends eighty percent of his time doodling instead of taking notes, he aces every test and can recite every piece of information that’s been discussed in class with no problem.

He’s caring and funny, and so unapologetically himself. He takes you to art museums on your spare time, talks about the latest conspiracy that’s on his mind, and always insists you go for milkshakes every Sunday night.

And boy was he cute. The way he tilts his head all the way back and crinkles his eyes when he laughs makes your heart absolutely melt.

Huang Renjun makes you happy and positive and there’s nothing more in this world that you want than to hold his hand and kiss him in public, as well as call him your boyfriend so bad. 

It wasn’t until you were out late with him, hanging out on the roof at Jeno’s house, trying to escape the loudness that was coming from inside. Jeno was throwing a kickback to celebrate the beginning of summer, something he does ever year, in which there’s always too many people inside, and you and Renjun find yourself on the roof trying to seek solace in the stars. 

Renjun looked so ethereal in the moonlight. There was nothing more that you wanted to do than press your lips ever so gently against his, and hold his hand while staring up at the stars displayed so brightly above you both in the dark sky. 

“What are you thinking about bubs?” Renjun asked, referring to the nickname he gave you when he found out that’s the name you gave your favourite stuffed rabbit when you were a child. 

God the way his voice sounded in this moment made you weak. The tipsiness you both experienced earlier was wearing off, causing your lack of hydration to become present through your raspy voices. 

But you don’t care. You’re with Renjun, and you are warm and comfortable and in love. 

In love. 

You’re in love with Huang Renjun and you can’t keep it in any longer.

Maybe this would be the best time to tell him. Every time you’re completely sober, you push the idea to the side, trying your best to forget your feelings for him even exist. What if Jun doesn’t feel the same? What if he does but months down the line you figure out you’re better off as friends, and then when you try to get back into your non-romantic routine, everything feels off? You always worry that things will go wrong and Renjun will eventually stop being your friend.

Not tonight though. Renjun looks gorgeous in the moonlight and the little bit of alcohol that remains in your system is acting as your source of encouragement, convincing you to confess to him right now and hope for the best outcome possible. 

“Love,” you reply nonchalantly. 

“Love?” he questions, staring back to you, seemingly surprised with your response. 

“Yeah. Just wondering what the universe has in store for me, you know?” you ask, turning your body to face his direction, criss crossing your legs over one another. “The idea of love both intrigues me and freaks me out. It’s exciting anticipating what will come from it, but the fear of something going wrong down the line makes me not want to pursue it, you know?” you say, staring innocently into his eyes.

He cocks his head, an intrigued look falling on his face. He purses his lips, looking as if he’s going to say something, but remains silent. 

You both remain in silence for the next several minutes, which causes your thoughts to wander. What if Renjun has caught on? Maybe he’s thinking of ways to turn you down gently. Or he’s trying to express that he somehow knows you’re talking about him, and he’s trying to do so in a similar manner. 

But the silence is killing you, and you want nothing more than for Renjun to say something. Anything to get your thoughts to shut up, and your heart race to stop rapidly beating.

“I think you shouldn’t be scared of love,” he finally says. 

Taking a deep breath, he looks off into the sky, admiring the many stars laying millions of miles away from you both. “I get that you never know what may come out of it, but I think it’s worth a shot to know you tried, and to experience something you’re not fully sure is going to work,”  he speaks softly.

“Take a look at the universe for example. It’s so big and undiscovered, yet millions of people are fascinated by it. We’re obsessed with the stars and galaxies and the possibility of aliens- which I know for a fact exist by the way, yet we’re not afraid to spend our time discovering them and giving them our attention. I think of love in a similar manner. Yeah the thought seems so broad and scary, as there’s so many things to experience and discover, but I think it’s worth it. You’re only going to learn new things about yourself and life, so why not give it a shot?”

He clears his throat, and pays his attention back to you. He has a look of determination in his eyes, and that only makes you grow even more anxious.

“Aren’t you a wise expert on love, Mr. Huang,” you chuckle.

“Well what can I say? I do a lot of thinking on my spare time when I’m not bickering with you,” he laughs, positioning himself on his arms so he can get a better view of the night sky.

“Hey!” you shout, pushing onto his arm, causing him to lose his newly comfortable position and to fall on his back. “What are you thinking about Ren? You have this sour look on your face.”

“Well your idea of love got me thinking,” he says softly, staring into your eyes.

Nervousness takes over your body. You have no idea what he’s going to say, and every second of silence is eating you up.

“And?” you say abruptly, eager to know what he’s about to say. 

“I’ve been thinking about this for a while now, and I don’t know, I never thought much of it because I’m a wimp, but I think I’m going to ask Yeri out” he confesses, a small smile forming on his face. 

The mention of Yeri makes your heart sink. Yeri. He wants to ask out Yeri. Not you. 

Of course he likes Yeri. What isn’t there to like about her? She’s really pretty and polite, and they’re both the editors of the school newspaper, so they spend a great amount of time with each other. 

God this hurt. 

“Oh really,” you respond, with a less enthusiastic tone replacing your prior happy one.

“Yeah. We’ve been getting to know each other a lot more ever since we got asked to do this editorial on the basketball team, and I think I may have feelings for her”

“Well, um I think you should go for it Renjun, “ you reply, looking off into the stars to help keep what’s happening off your mind. If you look into his eyes, you’re certain you’ll start crying.

If it’s not you, you’re glad he has an interest in a girl with a golden heart and personality. 

“You think? What if she doesn’t like me?” he asks nervously, fiddling with the rings on his fingers.

“Like you said Ren, you never know what will come from love. Why not give it a shot if it’ll lead to potentially greater things not only within yourselves, but life in general? And if she ends up only seeing you as a friend, it’s okay. You’ll find someone one day who loves every part of you.”

And you can’t help but know deep down that that person is you. If Yeri rejects him, you’ll be right here to help him pick up the pieces, if not, you’ll still be here. As his best friend. Renjun deserves all the love and happiness the universe has to offer him, and despite being sad he shows no romantic interest in you, you’re glad he finds it in an amazing girl. 

“Alright cool, I guess I’ll ask her out on Monday when we meet up to discuss the paper then.” he says, smiling to himself. 

He looks so happy. Ecstatic even. You haven’t seen him smile this big since he won first place in your school’s art show.

“She’s here you know, at the party,” you say to him. “You should do it now.”

“You think?” he asks, eyes wide. 

Renjun was never one to act on impulse. He’s a man with a plan, and always has to do things by the book or else he’ll lose his hair. He likes structure and time, a complete flip from your bold and impulsive self. 

“Yeah, why not? You’re both here, you look really cute right now, and the stars are out in your favour, shining bright to provide you with the courage to do so.” 

This makes Renjun smile. You’ve always been a help in boosting his confidence, and you’re glad to be of assistance in such a nerve-wracking yet exciting period in his life. 

Standing up, he dusts the possible dirt off his legs. He crouches over, looking into your eyes and grabs your hand. “You’re the best y/n. I don’t know what I’d do without you.”

“As I with you,” you reply, a soft grin forming from your lips. “Now go downstairs and ask her out before she leaves.”

Standing back up, he begins walking to the door. “I’ll let you know how it goes!” he half shouts, pressing his hand to the door handle,  and making his way back into the house. 

You’re now left alone, on the rooftop, with just the stars and your thoughts. 

Why didn’t you bring up your feelings to him sooner, you thought. Now you’re only left sad and alone, because you were too scared to tell your best friend you’re in love with him. Confessing to him seemed so perfect in your mind a couple minutes ago, but sadly the universe has other plans in store for you. 

You decide to get comfortable and lie down, and begin to look at the constellations that are possibly present within the night sky. You can still hear the loud, most likely drunk people just a floor below you, and the vibration of the music hitting your body despite being away from the noise. But you don’t care. It’s just you and the sky, and you’re doing everything in your power to forget about the party below you, and to focus on the stars. 

As you point out the orion in the sky, you feel a buzz in your back pocket, indicating that you’ve got a text. Reaching for it, you unlock your phone, and see a notification stating that Renjun messaged you. Pressing on the messages app, you click on his name and read the following:

jun bug: she said yes!! we’re going out on tueday after we’re done editing :) (2:17 AM)

“Yes.” Yeri said yes. 

You’re happy for your best friend, but for yourself, you’re heartbroken. The possibility of dating him is now slim to none, especially since a potential girlfriend is in the mix, only making you more sad for yourself. 

You make sure to reply quick, and in a way that’ll make him happy, and hopefully provide you with the positivity that everything will be okay.

y/n: i’m so happy for you ren <3 (2:18 AM)

As you press send, you feel the tears start to slide down your cheeks. You’re happy for him, you really are, but you can’t help but wish that things went differently, and that you were in Yeri’s position. 

But as Renjun said before, love can be scary. It’s a learning experience, and if it doesn’t work out, you just need to take what you can from it, and hope for the best in the future. 

So you’ll take his words, and you’ll try your best to move on. 

It’ll be tough, but you hope to god that one day he’ll just be your best friend, and that this heartbreak won’t last with you forever. 

[writingdreamdaddy]

Oh! A new blog! Hello, im glad people are still producing ddadds content :) Id like to request maybe, like. How the dads spend a free day woth dadsona? Like. Theyre all busy and have their own things going on, but what happens when its just a random day, their kids are away for whatever reason (maybe a sleep over or something) and they suddenly find themselves with unexpected free time?

Ahhh i love this kinda stuff! I hope i did the ask some justice. (All the kids are out of it except River because she’s a baby and the best thing in the game)

Robert—

               Theoverhang’s beauty never ceased to amaze you. Every season, any time of day, itwas the most beautiful spot. Usually Robert would take you here late at night whenhe couldn’t sleep or needed a distraction. Lately he took you up here just tospend time with you and recollect himself. As he recovered, you two came uphere earlier and earlier as his sleep schedule slowly started to get back in rhythm.You two hadn’t been able to spend much time together as of late with Amandacoming home for break and Robert making trips up to Val’s, but eventually youtwo found time; when you did, he took you to the overhang. Spending time withRobert was always cherished. It was simple, it was calm, and today it was 7pm.The days were shorter, and the sun was setting, covering the dying leaves in agolden hue. Many yellow and orange leaves still clung to trees, some mixed onthe ground with the brown leafs or floated in the bay below. Robert told youhis favorite season was fall because the dead wood was good for whittling andplentiful. Definitely not because he kinda liked the color yellow, thedrive up to the overhang was breathtaking with the color change, and watchingBetsy play in the leaf piles or eat them was the cutest thing in the world. Youtwo were sitting in the back of his pickup truck with an ugly thick wool red blanketcovering you two. He wanted to come up here to spend time with you, so he wasn’twhittling or broodily staring off into the distance. Instead you two had discussionsabout this, that, and the other thing, with long breaks of silence in between. Hewas healthier and happier and laughing. Nothing made you smile bigger. When thesun nearly disappeared into the bay, you scooted a little closer to him andrested your head on his shoulder. He wrapped an arm around you and pulled youthat much closer. “Sorry we haven’t spent a lot of time together,” your voicewas raspy and tired. When you looked up at Robert, he was watching thecity light up with a small smirk on his face. With that, the two of you sat in silenceonce more, enjoying the time together.

Matt –

               Matexited his kitchen with two steaming mugs and handed one to you. The roads werecovered in ice with an overnight snow storm and nearly every shop and everyschool was closed; that included the Coffee Spoon. Camensita wanted to spendher snow day playing outside with the other kids, and Mat wanted to spend hiswith you. Nothing special was planned since it was so last minute, but a Pixarmovie was picked out and he put extra marshmallows in your hot cocoa. It was aday spent on the couch wrapped in several blankets, eating left over Chinesefood, and laughing at the movies you two picked out. Spending time with you wasthe most relaxing thing Mat could do. He didn’t get many days off, and eventhough you visited him at the Coffee Spoon often, time like this was stillprecious. You couldn’t cuddle up on the couch the entire day at work. He couldn’tlaugh loudly and critique every movie that played at work, and he most definitely could not kiss you the way hedoes at home, at work.

Joseph—

               You andJoseph were on the dock. It was mother’s day weekend so the kids were with Marytoday. It was the first day Joseph had nothing to do in weeks. This Saturday was the only day he had off until Churchservice tomorrow. You both had your pants rolled up and your legs were hangingof the edge as you looked out into the water. He was exhausted and stressed outbeyond belief, which is why you dragged him out here. You were going to forcehim to relax damnit. Usually when youtwo had free time like this you would actually go on the boat, or go out fordinner, or just sit in his backyard and talk by a fire. Today was different. Atfirst it was nice and silent, just sitting next to each other and enjoying oneanother’s company. Then you scooted closer to him and you two exchanged a kissor two and you’d tell a fact about whales every now and then. You two startedgossiping about the neighbors and Joseph would start venting about everythingand everyone. You two talked the day away before retreating to the boat forsome drinks and much needed sleep. The free day wasn’t spent doing anythingextravagant, but that doesn’t mean it wasn’t perfect.

Hugo—

               Springbreak was a blessing to Hugo. He had nowhere to be and nothing to grade, andthis year was his ex-husbands turn to take Ernest on vacation. That left himwith a little over a week to do whateverhe wanted, within the legal system of course. That mostly meant watching old wrestling matches he had recorded or writing like he usually does, but this time he was only in hisunderwear, and he was only in his underwear all the time. He got boredimmediately though and anxiously waited for your day off to come. When it finally did,he wanted to do everything. He justwanted to get out of the house. So you two went to the movies, the museum, shopping,and ended it with a lovely dinner. It was an exhausting day for both of you.The two of you wound up at your house since Hugo was still a little stir-crazy.You had changed into pajama pants and a t-shirt, and Hugo changed into a shirtyou lent him. The two of you laid in bed, you were playing with his hair andlaughing at the comments he made, or the facts he told. You curled up next tohim and shut your eyes but continued to talk about why The Undertaker and JohnCena were overrated with him. And this was the part of the day he remembered.Sure, the movie was fun, and the amount of useless knowledge you had aboutrandom things was entertaining in the museum, and yeah the sunglasses youbought today were absolutely ridiculous and made him laugh on the ride home when you wore them proudly. But it was watching you tiredly smileup at him, attempting to braid his hair and failing horribly, and you gentlykissing him goodnight. That’s what he took away from today.

Damien—

               Tonightwas date night and Lucien had left to spend the night at some friend’s house;the stars were aligning. It had been weeks since you two had gotten together todo something stupidly romantic and he was going to make it special. He cleanedthe house, cooked your favorite meal, and set his table with the finest thingshe owned. The night went by smoothly; eating and drinking and enjoying theothers company as if no time had passed. He didn’t want it to end so quickly.Dinner was done, the dishes were done, and the closing hour of the date wascoming up. He dreaded the thought of you leaving. The animal shelter has beenbusy as of late, which is great! It just eats up any available time he has, andthe chance of your schedule lining up with his, on date night. It was a miracle that was going by too fast. You werechatting away on the couch, talking about Amanda, work, and everything thatcame into your conscious stream of thought. He missed this, missed you. So when you got up to leave, heimmediately asked if you wanted to spend the night, to which you gladlyaccepted. That’s when Damien realized he spent most of the date worrying aboutit ending rather than enjoying it, so he was going to soak in every momentforward. You two got ready for bed together and made it as extravagant aspossible. The two of you would take a bubble bath together with face-masks onand wine in hand. You laughed together and talked about life and how busy it hadgotten. When you got out the conversation would continue while laying on top ofthe bed. It was well past midnight by the time you two finally got in thecovers and went to sleep with smiles on your faces.

Craig—

               Heneeded a day off. Even after the talk you guys had about him working himselftoo hard and not doing enough for himself, he was still the busy workout dadwho did everything. Just a little less than he did before. You had convincedhim to take a day off the weekend the kids were going to softball camp. Theidea of another camping trip sounded fun but needed some time to prepare for itwhich neither of you did. Nothing was packed, and finding a babysitter forRiver on such short notice would be even more stressful. He needed to dosomething other than work at his house or work at the gym. It was nice outsideso the thought of going for a walk crossed you lips, going out for dinnercrossed his, and so on and so forth. You sat on the deck chairs in Craig’s backyard trying to come up with a plan. Craig had River bouncing on his knee whileshe played with her stuffed capybara and you watched from where you wereseated. You two were always on the move, always going somewhere or doingsomething. Granted, it was fun to go to softball games, to smugly tell the momsafterwards that Craig wasn’t single anymore, going out for dinner, all of that.It was rare to get free time together, but it was rarer to get free timetogether and use it doing nothing. Soyou laid back in your seat and talked with Craig and occasionally babbled withRiver. You two lounged in the backyard well past Craig’s/River’s usual naptimeas he would tell you over and over while taking another sip of his drink but never doing anything to further the protest.Stories were told, River was played with, and time was wasted perfectly.

Brian—

               Youwanted to give mini golf another shot. It was embarrassing how bad you did lasttime you went with Brian, Daisy, and Amanda. To redeem yourself, you droveBrian back to the Mini Golf Place while Daisy was at a sleepover and Amanda wasin school. The kids were the real reason you lost, they were a distraction iswhat you told Brian. You two spent hours at the golf course, you lined up everyshot you made and used extra precaution before doing anything. By the time thegame was over, Brian lost and it was definitely not because he let you win. Theride home was you reliving your highlights from the day and Brian smiling andcommenting how great you were. You were something else, but Brian wouldn’t haveit any other way. Seeing you proud of yourself was look he’d love to see youwear every day.

[chrliekclly]

do you think charlei and dee had sex because they mistook their genuine platonic bonding as attraction? (serious question, steming from thatlesbian dee post). I never thought of it that way, and I'm interested to hear that side !

YES that’s actully smthn i lose my sht abt !! iv blown up ppls mssgs with this kinda talk like, im a mess. ok lemme type right nd lemme type A Lot Again Anyways cz thos 2 giv me Way too many feelings (im spposd to b working on a final rn christ…)

okay…i scrolled back up after finishing nd turns out i went…literally insane…aka Much too far…so i need to under-the-cut it. mobile…viewers…i’m rly so sorry. swipe hard to leap ahead…hell im sorry fr computer viewers too. my theme is rough.

to start, my HCs surrounding chardee are rooted in charlie being on the ace spectrum and dee being gay (or like @ least bi, but imo all the men stuff is straight up compulsory heterosexuality).

i will always cling tight to the deleted scene wherein charlie says he thinks sex is gross and will genuinely get sick when he thinks about it unless he thinks about it with one specific woman. i know he shows sexual interest a decent amount of times throughout the show and has canonically had sex (on camera too, yeesh) but i see each time as very out of the blue moments (coming onto dee @ multiple points while worked up, agreeing to bang tatiana cuz she says to, that kinda thing) or relating to his long standing and delusional obsession with the waitress. in that vein, he’s also canonically enjoyed sex, and I don’t try and blind-eye any of it, because ace doesn’t always mean sex can’t be enjoyed in the moment. charlie definitely has a libido, and bodies be bodies. hell, sex-repulsed can sometimes even flip 180 in the right conditions. shit is one fun spectrum i’ll tell you that…but either way, to start with him, i think him going forward with banging dee was very much a misjudgment of what feelings are and being extremely caught up in a moment where he felt real, genuine, closeness with someone else who he was having a damn good time making terrible poetry with.

as for dee, i, first of all, just agree with everything in that post. in the context of chardee, as much as i will lose my mind in tags about how hard i ride or die the ship, it’s mostly my obsession with their dynamic. i don’t think chardee is meant to be endgame. i absolutely 100% believe that dee, too, is misinterpreting her feelings. i think part of it is her consistent comp het, and the other is she’s never been close with someone the way she has been with charlie, and she doesn’t know what she’s meant to do with it. i think she was similarly caught up in a moment in which she showed her own vulnerability, opening herself up to someone who could easily just ridicule her as she’s used to (”right now? i’m scared”), and she receives support from him instead (”you’re not gunna bomb, you’re gunna do great”). we’ve seen how much dee craves validation, thats her entire thing. i’m not shocked she dropped her pants in this moment lmao. she probably felt her damn heart flutter cuz she got told by someone who she at least somewhat trusts that she really is good, even if she doesn’t think so. the only rational explanation for the feeling associated with that person is that he’s The One right? pretty big leap

just…basically i dont think either of them know what a relationship is.

charlie’s lived nearly his entire life deluding himself into thinking that, 1. he and the waitress have a relationship that is anything other than creepy, and 2. that the warped-ass mess of an image he’s created in his brain for what he and the waitress are to each other is what love is. he thinks he’s making progress in getting close to her when the only thing she’s Ever done pre-s12 is ask him to leave her the fuck alone. he’s never even attempted to look past the waitress before, and the only time he shows interest in other people it’s purely his libido talking. he doesn’t pursue romance, and the one time we’ve seen him do so he was using her to get to, who else?, the damn waitress. 

dee’s lived her entire life having to prove herself to every single person she interacts with, and its familiar to her to getting ahead by using men, usually as sexual objects. i’m hesitant to bring this up on a post wherein i speak on dee’s sexuality because i don’t want to link this trait to it in any way as if its related, but to be fair, dee is as much a serial rapist as dennis is in that regard. the gang are shitty people, we know that. she will get men drunk to have sex with them, or pressure them into it, or trick them into it. she’s not having sex with these men for pleasure, she’s literally doing it for power. it’s absolutely fucked up, but so is she.

when she Is romantically involved, she’s shown to leap headfirst into those relationships and blow them out of proportion on 0 grounds for it. she buys a promise ring for a guy who didn’t think they were dating, it’s implied she’s going to actually go ahead with the brad fisher marriage thing after the episode ends, she gloats about how important she is to a stripper who was literally shame-crying during sex (also? she says “we BOTH wept,” and she can say that’s because it was that good, but i really doubt it). i mean the woman GAGS when talking to men she’s “nervous” around, something she takes as meaning she’s attracted to them? lmao uh???

at this point i’ve probably repeated myself over and over, my brain is on backwards and my train of thought went off the rails years ago. but i’m still gunna retype an old set of tags i found:

i hc that neither of them end up together but they do go through a relationship-ish phase, but dee’s gay and charlie’s okay with that (and always ace in my mind) because they finally move on from their own irrational drives to adhere to what they think is expected of them. i dont think either of them have any idea what a relationship is meant to be and they pathetically grasp at each other because they’re kind-ish to one another and that feels safe for once. chardee may be my main ship but i purposefully backtrack on myself because i know they’re two people who barely know love and have found each other, both as underdogs in their environments, and feel an electrifying Something that they Cant Name wen theyre together, and that something just so happens to be friendship and they don’t realize it cuz they’re doofuses who’ve led really unfortunate lives where friendship and hatred are always intermingling.

i’ve never brought it up here, but i often imagine a timeline of their relationship, because i enjoy the idea of them figuring themselves out through each other, just because they are genuinely amazing (platonically) together, and they get into some of my favorite shit. the thought of late night talks and confessions about their worries and confusion about their feelings while lying in bed, just close because they feel comfortable that way, realizing they can keep loving each other and not force it to mean something it doesn’t, the relief that comes with that, a final kiss that really doesn’t mean anything but thank you, not losing what they had but rather gaining a whole new kind of intimacy, and still getting into absolutely ridiculous situations. maybe dee realizes shes, ironically, found herself with a crush on the waitress and it cracks charlie up. he doesnt mind. he’s finally learned that if he Is going to be with someone it should definitely be with someone who makes him feel at Least half as comfortable as the way being around dee does, and knowing he doesn’t have to make himself look for that, but when he knows he will know. plus, he cant imagine dee pulling that one off. but maybe one day she does. dees gentler around the edges, and she gets butterflies when talking to women, but she never gags. charlie’s a terrible wingman but he keeps convincing dee to let him try. she brings a girl home for the first time and charlie all but backflips in an empty pool that day. they’re still shithats but they’re learning to let that go. people can get better. AA would probably help.

iv gone too far goodbye