#im bawling and crying and screaming in the most positive of ways

[sulfies]

I got an idea for an art or story. Concept is this: Ezio finds a Piece of Eden that shaped as a necklace that is able to go back and time, so Ezio uses it to try and save his family. But there’s a cost to it, you can use the power of the necklace to kill and save whomever but the power is to strong that whoever wields it dies. Ezio accepts that price and uses the Piece of Eden necklace to save his family but soon after he dies. And Giovanni, Federico, and Petruccio mourn him. How’s that sound? 😁

Woahh what a bittersweet idea, but why would Ezio need to use it to kill if the necklace can just take him back in time? I think he would be able to do it himself :3

This is a bit of a long request, most of my fics are around 1-2k :,3 so I don't think I can write the whole fic but I could write a blurb (sorry about that)

-------

"Do it"

Ezio felt his vision go black and that was that. It was done.

It was Giovanni who woke up first, with a long gasp his hands around his neck eyes filled with tears, his hands rushed to pat the side of his bed finding Maria sleeping in the same position he always remembered her in. Droplets started to fall on his cheek. He knew why he was crying... He lost something. Something deeply important he will never get back.

It felt like his heart was ripped out.

Frederico woke up next in his room, bolting up coughing heavily as he fell to the floor.

"No... No no no" His hands fisted his hair "You did not do that n-" clutching at his chest he wanted to scream, he stopped as his ears picked up Petruccio's cry from the next door over. He got up and rushed in finding the boy hugging his knees bawling.

"Oh cuore mio... Its okay Im here"

The sobs only grew louder but the little brother let himself be embraced into a rocking hug. "Its... Its not okay- be- becau"

Frederico shushed... petting his brothers' golden locks "I know... I know"

"I want him back!"

"I know, I know... but-"

The two brothers looked up at the knock on the doorway that made his way in, crushing them in a hug. Faces muffled in each other's shoulders tears staining the expensive fabrics with choked breaths. Giovanni kissed each of the boys' foreheads one by one with longing. Inhaling the smell of home but missing one...

"So do I."

[tsumuus]

here for the 555 event!! congrats ^^

i’d like to rq a romantic matchup!! i’ve watched hq a lot so i’m way more familiar w the charas, but if you think there’s a better mha chara, i’ve recently gotten into it and so i’d really love that too! i’m a straight female so i’d like the matchup to be male please :))

my good friends would call me super bubbly and super energetic. i’m often told that i light up a room, and i’m super positive and optimistic. i am a d1 yapper and the ultimate thought daughter lmao. it does, however, take a little while for me to get comfortable and really let my personality come out with new people. i’m a bit quieter with people i don’t know. (trust you js gotta let my personality defrost) while i love people and spending time with my loved ones, i do need time alone to recharge. my mbti is infp. i can spend lots of time with my close friends when we can just sit together and cuddle and not talk, but i find it difficult to spend lots of time with people who have to be doing something all the time. i’m SUPER empathetic and a big crier. it takes NOTHING to make me cry. hopecore tiktok? sobbing. old people eating alone? crying. my friends sharing their traumatic experiences? bawling. a children’s movie? wailing. someone talking about animals? weeping. someone telling me how much they love me? howling. when my parents talk abt my immigrant grandparents’ upbringing? dying on the floor. i have the most tender heart ever and i feel things very deeply. however, i would not say that i let my emotions control me. when faced with upsetting situations, i have never once lost my temper or yelled at someone. my family is full of hotheads, and i’m really the only one able to stay calm and coolheaded. anger kind of scares me because of my family and so i really like people who are like me in the sense that they can be patient and understanding and talk things out instead of yelling. sometimes, i can get kind of avoidant and pretend like the problem doesn’t exist (due to my confrontation-avoidance) in addition to being unable to describe what i’m feeling in words when i’m worked up and also bc i’m scared of how they’ll react. i get annoyed with people who aren’t self-aware or aren’t able to pick up context clues. i get intense cuteness aggression and i love ppl who are smushes. sometimes i’ll just see one of my friends sitting there and i have to just run up to them and give them a fat hug and scream abt how much i love them and how cute they are and how they make me wanna sob bc i love them sm and they’re so FREAKIG CUTE.

due to family situations, i am kind of attention-starved and so when someone pays attention to me i am locked in with them for LIFE. i’m super loving and super affectionate and i have no issue showing it in private. however, in public, i’m not the hugest pda fan. if we’re watching a movie with friends, a head on the shoulder or a hand on the thigh is fine, but i just feel awk when people around me are like super pda lovey-dovey. it just icks me. i have no problem being suuuuper affectionate with my friends in public, but it’s different with bfs. i’d say my love languages are physical touch and quality time, but i will honestly soak up any love anyone gives me. i’m definitely kind of clingy, and i would get kind of insecure if they couldn’t love me with the same sort of passion. i have a lot of love to give, and i’m able to receive a lot of love in turn!!

i’d say my interests are pretty basic lol. i’m a big sabrina carpenter/ariana grande fan, i really like sweet drinks, im super girly and i like anything pink, i love romcoms, i play volleyball, im a big sephora enthusiast, i’ve rewatched gossip girl and clueless and mean girls many times, but i’m also big on children’s shows. sofia the first, liv and maddie, my little pony, ever after high, descendants, phineas and ferb, etc. i’m TERRIFIED of anything remotely horror or scary (one time i watched paddington 2 and i had nightmares for weeks) and so i think i like the comfort they give me knowing nothing REALLY scary can happen in them. (i’m still scared sometimes) i’m not really scared about getting run over by a car or getting kidnapped or anything real that has almost happened multiple times, but i am very scared that the evil princess ivy will come and cast a spell on me.

wow this was a lot of info sorry. (can you tell i’m a yapper) thank you sm in advance and congrats on 555!

your perfect match is…

₊✩‧₊˚ keiji akaashi ! ˚₊✩‧₊

₊✩‧₊˚ runner ups: osamu miya and eijiro kirishima ˚₊✩‧₊

✧₊⁺ akaashi’s calm and composed demeanor would provide the perfect balance to your bubbly and energetic personality

✧₊⁺ he’s someone who thrives in environments where he can observe and be thoughtful

✧₊⁺ which would allow him to appreciate your enthusiasm without being overwhelmed by it

✧₊⁺ since you mentioned being avoidant in confrontational situations

✧₊⁺ akaashi's patient and understanding nature would be a comforting presence

✧₊⁺ he’s known for his emotional intelligence and communication skills

✧₊⁺ which means he’d handle your emotions with care, always taking the time to talk things out rather than reacting impulsively

✧₊⁺ akaashi isn’t the type to raise his voice or get frustrated

✧₊⁺ he’s calm, composed, and would understand your need to avoid conflict while gently encouraging you to open up.

✧₊⁺ akaashi would appreciate your empathy and tender heart, always paying attention to your emotional cues

✧₊⁺ he’d be that person who notices when you’re on the verge of tears and subtly offers comfort without making you feel overwhelmed

✧₊⁺ his intuitive understanding of people would make him the perfect partner for someone who feels deeply, offering quiet support when you’re moved by something emotional, and he wouldn’t shy away from giving you all the attention you crave in meaningful, subtle ways

✧₊⁺ akaashi would find your affectionate outbursts both endearing and amusing

✧₊⁺ he might not be as open, but he’d secretly love your sudden hugs and declarations of love

✧₊⁺ probably offering you a small, amused smile or a gentle pat on the head in return

✧₊⁺ he’d let you express your affection fully without feeling awkward, knowing it’s your way of showing love

✧₊⁺ your preference for subtle PDA would align well with Akaashi's own more reserved nature

✧₊⁺ he wouldn’t feel the need for grand public displays of affection but would enjoy the quiet, private moments

✧₊⁺ like holding hands under the table or resting your head on his shoulder

✧₊⁺ in private, he’d return your affectionate, clingy nature, appreciating the warmth and comfort that comes with your love

✧₊⁺ your love for comfort shows and avoidance of anything remotely scary would also be something akaashi could relate to

✧₊⁺ he’s someone who appreciates calm, low-stress environments

✧₊⁺ given your love for quality time

✧₊⁺ akaashi would excel in creating meaningful moments with you

✧₊⁺ with your tendency to be super affectionate and sometimes clingy

✧₊⁺ akaashi’s emotional stability would provide a solid foundation

✧₊⁺ he’s not someone who would feel overwhelmed by your love

✧₊⁺ instead, he’d welcome it and offer reassurance, making you feel secure in your relationship

✧₊⁺ his calm approach would ease any insecurity, as he’d show through his actions and words that he’s there for you wholeheartedly

a/n holy yap😭 idk i just love akaashi so much <3

₊✩‧₊˚ 555 follower event ! ˚₊✩‧₊

main masterlist

[darkmulti]

please don’t listen to the hate, ily sm🥺

but can i get a noncon punishment jk smut when he finds out that mc has been seeing someone behind his back and he marks her to claim her?

-> sorry for any mistakes

-> K THIS IS PRETTY DARK! DO NOT READ IF YOU DO NOT LIKE ANY OF THE WARNINGS! ALL FICTIONAL!

⚠️: NON CON, Jungkook records you, kidnapping, somnophilia, slapping, YANDERE JUNGKOOK, hair pulling, anal

Jungkook was your overprotective best friend

For some reason he didn’t want you to date

You thought that he had feelings for you but when he started dating another girl, you were furious

You weren’t mad because he was dating another girl

You were mad because he wasn’t allowing you to date

Instead of telling him that your bio partner had asked you out

You kept it a secret

You also started to avoid him as much as you could

He was already preoccupied with his clingy girlfriend so it was a little easier

You and your bio partner, Levi, (DONT FCKING JUDGE ME, IM DEEP IN LEVI HOURS OKAY💀) were meeting up in the library everyday

Sometimes you guys would make out in the back

It was fun

You always felt free whenever you’re with Levi

You guys started hanging out more

Whenever Jungkook asked to hang, you would say you can’t and have a lot of homework

Since you and Jungkook didn’t take the same classes, you didn’t have to worry about him seeing you and Levi sitting together during class

You guys had opposite schedules which made it nearly impossible to spend time with each other

You were glad

You had even lost your virginity to Levi

All was going well until Jungkook unexpectedly came to your house while Levi was over

You thought the pizza was here but when you opened the door, your mouth dropped

Jungkook looked relieved after seeing you but after he heard Levi’s voice, his eyes went cold

“Who the fuck is in your house?!”

Jungkook tried stepping in but you pushed him out again

“Y/N, let me in!”

“No!”

“Why not?? Who’s in there?!”

“N-no one. You don’t need to know.”

Jungkook didn’t care anymore

He pushed you back and invited himself in

He saw Levi sitting on the couch comfortably, watching a movie

“Oh, so now I see. This is why you’ve been avoiding me. Because you’ve replaced me.”

“You can still be my best friend. As long as you allow me and Levi to date.”

“Date? Oh, so you’re not just friends.”

“No. But listen. I allow you to date whoever you want. Please let me date whoever I want.”

“Whatever. I don’t care now. I’m not your friend anymore.”

Jungkook slammed the door on the way out

You weren’t affected by it too much, because Jungkook was slowly becoming toxic

The next day at school, you and Levi stopped hiding your relationship

You guys were inseparable

Unfortunately Levi couldn’t come to your house today because he had plans with one of his friend

Therefore, you had the chance to finish up some homework and rest

After showering you went downstairs to grab something to eat when the doorbell rang

You opened the door and Jungkook was standing in front of you with a serious expression

“What are you doing here?”

Jungkook slapped you across the face then pushed you to the ground

He closed the door and made sure to lock it before pulling you by your hair upstairs to your room

You were of course screaming at him

Yelling at him to let you go but he only held your hair tighter

He pulled you up by you hair and pushed you on your bed

He got on top of you and slapped you again

“Jungkook! What the fuck is wrong with you?!”

“WHAT’S WRONG WITH ME?! THIS IS YOUR FAULT! YOU’RE A LYING WHORE! FUCK!” he yelled, scaring the life out of you

You’ve never heard him yell

It terrified you

“I’m gonna fucking show you who you belong to!”

He flipped you over and slapped your bare thigh

You heard his belt fall to the ground which made you even more scared

Then you heard the jeans unzipping

Your shorts and underwear were pulled down, revealing your soft cheeks

Jungkook’s hand immediately lands on your ass cheek over and over

He then aligned his tip and pushed in

You were trying to crawl away from him but it only made him more frustrated so he pulled you back and slammed into your ass

You whimper and collapse underneath him

“Please, n-no.”

You started to sob quietly while he fucked your ass hard

He leaned down and started marking your neck

Placing hickeys on each side, making it impossible to cover it up

You were bawling your eyes out under him

Your body was shaking in fear

You felt so weak and scared

You never would’ve thought that Jungkook out of all the people in the world would put you in this position

It made you cry even more

The man you once trusted the most was hurting you in an unimaginable way

You become a sobbing mess

Not only were you tolerating physical pain but now you were mentally hurt

Jungkook kept going at you, without stopping

His cock was stretching your little hole out which hurt like hell

The sound of the skin clapping was turning him on so much

He held your hips still and went at your ass at a fast pace

His pace made your legs shake uncontrollably

You felt yourself losing power over yourself

The tears were drying up, tightening your face

You felt exhausted

You wanted to fall asleep and never wake up

You don’t want to know what would happen the next day

You soon blacked out under Jungkook and he didn’t notice until he slowed down and saw your eyes closed

He took your phone off of the night stand and entered in your passcode which luckily remained the same

He took a video of him fucking you and sent it to Levi

After the video sent he blocked his number and pulled out of you

He knew Levi would be on his way so he picked your unconscious body up and left to his secluded home where no one will ever find you

[la-carcassa-famiglia]

Hi I am feeling an emotion and I want to share the DSqu wedding scenario that @cloudhayato​ and I have talked about

▲ That one post with the two way wedding aisle so both parties can have the experience of being walked there? We’re going with that

▲ Dino is the one who proposes. He does it in the middle of battle and Squalo is so fucking baffled. “DUMB HORSE BOY WHY ARE YOU ASKING ME NOW? OF COURSE IM SAYING YES!!!!”

▲ Huge weddings can call for more than one best man! So of course Romario and Tsuna are Dino’s best men and Squalo asked Xanxus. Xanxus did not refuse nor except so he just has that position now

▲ Lussuria helps the most with planning things out. He loves weddings! He’s also the one who walks Squalo down the aisle and Romario is the one who walks Dino

▲ Squalo wears an elaborate ocean themed dress with a long train during the ceremony and changes into an equally fancy suit for the afterparty. Dino has a very intricate gold accented tux. No boring black wedding tuxedos here

▲ As you can imagine, with the entire Vongola family there, the wedding is a mess. Fran and Bel steal the wedding cake

▲ Xanxus put his fucking throne in the middle of the aisle and Romario has to walk Dino around it. He’s just here to cause problems

▲ When the officiator does the whole “speak now or forever hold your peace” thing Xanxus raises his hand and Dino cries “REALLY??? AT MY WEDDING?” Xanxus proceeds to just talk about how pathetic he thinks Dino is. He’s not objecting to the wedding at all he just wants to make Dino’s life hell

▲Hibari stands up and wants to fight Dino right then and there. The other guardians have to coax him to sit back down and they barely succeed in doing so

▲ Dino tries so hard not to cry during the vows but he ends up bawling. Good thing they used waterproof eyeliner for him. I think Squalo would get misty eyed too

▲ Enzio is the ringbearer. They have to wait for this tiny turtle to slowly crawl over. Xanxus nudges him with his foot to make him go faster and Dino screams “NO!!!!!!!!!”

▲ Dino and Squalo are very happy despite the chaos. They love each other so so much and you can just see the joy in their eyes as they dance together

Sad bonus

▲ In the timeline with the future arc, Dino proposes so suddenly because he knows he or Squalo can die at any moment. They’re fighting for their lives every day and he doesn’t want it to be too late

▲ Tsuna of course isn’t there and is not Dino’s best man. There’s an empty seat left for him in the front row and Squalo has to help comfort Dino multiple times whenever he just, sadly stares at it

[burnedbyshoto]

Welcome Home - Part Three

todoroki shouto x first time parents fem!reader

warnings: fluff :D

word count: 4,564

A/N: im so sorry if y’all are sick and tired of pregnancy crap from me, because im not and neither are these anons. you can definitely read this independently from the other two parts theres nothing that connects them except Kaito but hes just your child so its no biggie honestly, i hope you two anons enjoy this so much! and im sorry that these aren’t h/c and i went with a super self-indulgent scenario instead.... anon if you want that hc still i will gladly write up a hc of this entire thing for you!! >:) anyways like subscribe at my youtube channel for more ;) enjoy

Part One  Part Two  Part Four

Todoroki Kaito was a force to be reckoned with. At only four years old he was able to evade most babysitters his parents had for him on the days neither or both of them could not be home with him, or when Kaito wasn't in school. His bright red hair was something that everyone figured would make him easy to spot, but he was just so slippery and quick. 

In fact at ten at night on a Tuesday night, when you and your loving husband Shouto were on route home after being in the office since four in the morning, he escaped. You smiled up at your husband who had his arm wrapped around your shoulder, his head resting upon your own as the two of you walked leisurely.

“Do you need me to carry you?” You teased Shouto as you seemed to be doing the heavy lifting during this walk, not that you minded carrying him.

“I do like being carried by strong women.” Shouto agreed as he suddenly put the mass majority of his body weight on you, catching you off guard as you shrieked stumbling many steps forward before catching your balance. “There we go.” Shouto murmured into your ear as you giggled now walking--dragging--Shouto with you as he refused to wrap his legs around you.

“MAMA!” The all too familiar and recognizable voice of Kaito sounded through the empty streets, and your eyes immediately spotted the tiny figure of your son running at what could only be his breakneck speed toward you.

“Kaito-chan?!” You shouted back, suddenly leaving Shouto to fall forward as you went racing for your child who flung himself into your arms.

“Mama, I missed you so much! It was nine p.m. and you and papa weren’t home so I had to go find you!” Kaito explained himself without you even having to ask. You sigh softly pushing your baby’s shaggy hair out of his eyes and you looked into Kaito’s eyes that were identical to your own.

“You know you can’t just come looking for us,” You reason with you toddler who was squirming in your arms to be given to Shouto, and you easily passed him over, and Shouto took the small child giving him an affectionate kiss on his forehead. “Besides where is Midoriya-san? Did you tell him where you were going?”

“Well, Midoriya-san said that I couldn’t, but then I decided that my mama was in trouble so I left anyways,” Kaito said as he decided to go back to your arms. “Kaito-chan, you can’t be doing that, at least tell Midoriya-san that you are leaving.” Shouto reasons and you kick your husband softly on his leg, giving a pointed look.

“Kaito-chan, mama, and papa are Pro-Heroes and sometimes we will get home late, but we will always be back to kiss you goodnight.” You whisper to your son who has his head nestled into your neck.

“I know,” Kaito understands, you know that, “But I’m stronger than papa, so I needed to make sure.”

You laugh as you ruffle his hair and look at Shouto who has rolled his eyes, but the smile never left his face. It was kinda cute how much Shouto loved his son, even when he made backhanded comments like that. “And I’m stronger than the both of you, so if we don’t make it home in two minutes I’m going to ground the both of you.” You threaten as you begin walking again knowing your house was just around the corner of this block.

The next thing you knew, Shouto was carrying the both of you and started running with the two of you in his arms, “Go, papa! GO!” Kaito cheered on as in under a minute the three of you were outside the door.

“Now, I’m sure Midoriya-san hasn’t noticed you’re gone, because you’re supposed to be asleep like a good boy,” You tell Kaito as he holds your hand as you all search for wherever Izuku is in the house, “So you are going to apologize to him.”

“You’re going to make Midoriya flip,” Shouto states as he wraps his arms around your waist, his face pressed into your neck as he places a chaste kiss there.

“It’ll be hilarious,” You respond back, gently leaning into your husband as your son apologizes to Midoriya who had not noticed his disappearance.

You grinned looking at your husband as you watched Midoriya sprinting into the hallway of your house, Kaito tossed onto his shoulders like a sack of potatoes.

“Y-Y/n-chan! Shouto!” Midoriya laughs awkwardly as he places a hand to his neck, shifting his body as if to hid Kaito who’s feet were dangling very obviously in the front.

“Kiss mama, Midoriya-san! That’s what papa does to get away with things!” Kaito screams from his position as if unaware of how far away they were from him 

“Kaito-chan, I-I can’t do that!” Midoriya stutters as he shakes a hand in denial to the married couple in front of him.

“Yeah, Midoriya, kiss y/n, so you can get away from it,” Shouto repeats Kaito’s command and Midoriya splutters completely flustered.

You let out a few laughs as you can’t believe the situation you were in currently, “Kaito-chan, only mama and papa can kiss each other; if anyone else tries to do it that's wrong.”

Kaito struggled to rise up from his hanging position from Midoriya’s shoulder, and there are fat toddler tears in his eyes, “So I can’t kiss you any-anymore, mama?” He bawls as you realize your mistake scooping your son from Midoriya who was still beet red. 

“No no, baby.” You coo softly at Kaito as you give Shouto a pointed look as he was giving you a teasingly stare for making Kaito cry. “You can kiss your mama as much as you want, but adults can’t go kissing me or your papa.”

Eventually, you manage to say goodnight to Midoriya, and Kaito slams his forehead to his cheek as a way of saying goodnight. Shouto and you take Kaito back into his room as the sleepy redhead boy was falling asleep on your shoulder, murmuring about how he wanted chocolate milk but Shouto wouldn’t buy him chocolate milk.

“Goodnight, my baby Tenshi.” You whisper lovingly to Kaito as you press a kiss to his cheek.

“G’night, Mama…” Kaito sighs as he wraps his arms around you tightly, “I missed you today…”

You smile wider as you muzzle your nose into his cheek, “And I missed you, but I love you, and go to sleep before you make mama miss her beauty sleep.”

Kaito giggles as you stand up, letting Shouto give his own bedtime routine with Kaito. And you watch on as you always do as your husband playful tickles your son, who goes and starts screeching in mercy only to fling himself into Shouto’s arms and you smile as they exchange: I love you’s.

By the time the two of you exit Kaito’s room, your baby is long since knocked out.

You showered first the night, as apart of your guys designed schedule.

As Pro-Heroes, being in a happy marriage and a loving family with a toddler son required some work. Ever since you were off maternity leave from heroics, the two of you had a schedule that had yet to fail.

Monday’s were your day off, that day you were taking care of Kaito by yourself and doing whatever necessary around the house. Wednesday’s, or tomorrow, was Shouto’s days off, and he took care of Kaito and ran necessary errands outside of the house. Friday’s were the best days though, the two of you didn’t work, so you would spend half the day with Kaito and then go out together that night. It worked flawlessly, and even after four years, Friday nights were always something you looked forward too.

You sat on your bed, already under the covers as you heard the shower turn off. You were currently texting Mina about if she was sure she wanted to take care of Kaito on Thursday. Most of your friends were always eager and ready to take care of your guy’s son, most likely because he was still a baby and with his quirk still unmanifested, it made taking care of him easier.

Your eyes snapped up to see Shouto walking out of the bathroom still wet from the shower, a towel wrapped around his waist, and even after how many years of seeing a sight like this you froze and blushed.

“Look away, pervert.” Shouto teased you and you playfully scoffed, turning on your side and turning off your light, you needed to sleep.

In only a few seconds, Shouto was climbing into bed, dressed for sleep. His arm pulling you closer to him, and you smiled softly before turning around to be properly held by him.

“So what are you doing with our son tomorrow?” You ask Shouto as your fingers trailed in soft stroking motions on his shoulders.

“Well, we don’t need any errands to be done, so I was thinking that park after lunch, and then maybe I’ll convince him to make dinner with me for his gorgeous mother.” Shouto sighs softly as your fingers gently massage a knot you found in his neck.

“Oh, his mother? I’ve always heard good things.” You say nonchalantly as Shouto’s hands move from your back to your hips.

“She’s the best, honestly, well… if I’m being honest she does have this fatal flaw.” Shouto grins up at the ceiling as your eyes sharply squint.

“Yeah?”

“Oh yeah…” Shouto agrees, starting to laugh at what he’s going to say next, “She is a little bitch.”

He catches your hands that went to smack him, and immediately rolls his weight over so that you’re trapped between him and the mattress, “Oh, did I mention to add she’s predictable?” Shouto continues as he smirks down at you.

“You’re annoying.” You retort weakly as you watch your husband come down to kiss you softly.

“That sucks for you,” He mutters against your lips and you kiss him back ready to prove to him just how unpredictable you really were.

⋆✭⋆✭⋆⋆✭⋆✭⋆

Shouto woke up the next morning to you leaving for the day and smiled when you gave him a sweet kiss goodbye. “Don’t you dare hurt my child.” You threatened playfully as he grabbed you pulling you back into the bed.

“I’m sure there will be a nearby Pro-Hero to save him just in case,” Shouto whispers as he tries to steal a few more minutes in bed with you.

“Bakugo and Mina will yell at me if I’m late again!” You squeal as you squirm hopelessly against him.

“Alright, mama, go kick some ass today.” Shouto relents as he lets you go.

“I’ll kick your ass,” You mock as you press a final kiss to his lips.

“I’m sure you will.”

After watching as you kiss your still sleeping son goodbye, he walks you out the door and upon returning to his bed Shouto then falls back asleep.

“PAPA, WAKE UP!” A voice roared and Shouto’s eyes shot open as Kaito was sitting on his chest his y/e/c eyes centimeters from his. “Oh papa, I thought you were dead…” Kaito groaned as he collapsed onto Shouto's face.

“I was sleeping, Kaito-chan.” Shouto laughs as he sits up, catching his son in his arms.

“Well, I didn’t know that and was going to perform C-P-P,” Kaito exasperates with a pointed look, a smile never leaving his face.

“C-P-R.” Shouto corrects Kaito as he throws him gently onto the bed.

“C-P-R…” Kaito mutters, his face scrunching as he shakes his head, “No, papa, it’s C-P-P!” He screams in defiance.

“Hm, you may be right,” Shouto says, pretending to think about the spelling as he gets out of bed, “I think we’ll ask your beautiful and smart mama tonight, huh.”

“If I win, I get to sleep in the bed with mama, and you take my bed!” Kaito grins with his teeth on full display as he shimmies off the bed.

“I’ll take that bet,” Shouto agrees, grabbing the edge of the sheet and sees Kaito mimicking his actions and together they make the bed.

“Alright, piggy let's go brush some teeth!” Shouto says throwing his son up onto his shoulders, and can’t help the warm feeling in his stomach at the roar of giggles coming from Kaito.

Shouto spends the rest of the morning attempting to make his son some pancakes while Kaito attempts to paint his toenails, although Shouto is nearly positive he’s only managed to paint the flesh and not the nail. “Wow, I really like the neon yellow you chose.” Shouto points out as Kaito nods his head against his calf.

“Mama does it so much better, but I think mine is still pretty,” Kaito said as he looks at the disaster of the nail polish over his foot. Shouto looks down and has to physical bite his tongue to keep himself from laughing.

“We have to show mama this, huh Kaito-chan,” Shouto says as he puts the pancakes on a plate. “Hold on.”

Kaito latches tighter onto Shouto’s leg as he easily walks to the table despite the extra weight on his leg. Kaito screams of laughter made everything better and Shouto even went around the kitchen table one time after Kaito begged for more.

Shouto watched as Kaito poured syrup onto his pancakes with a concentrated look on his face, his chubby hands barely able to hold the bottle. “You got enough syrup there, Kaito-chan?” Shouto asked as he waited for Kaito to be done so he could also pour on some syrup.

“Nope! I want it to fill the house with syrup.” Kaito explains cheerfully as Shouto chuckles.

“I don’t think your mama would appreciate sleeping with syrup in her hair, remember the time she found a feather in her hair?”

“Mama is pretty silly.” Kaito agreed as he handed the syrup over to Shouto.

“And we can go to the park afterward?” Shouto offered when pancakes were stuffed into Kaito’s face, and his eyes sparkled in excitement.

“YESH, PWEASE?!” Kaito shouted food spraying everywhere.

The two males stared at the food on the table and echoes of laughter sounded through the house.

Shouto tried dressing his son who was in the middle of playing the part of a superhero, “I want to be just like mama!” Kaito shouted as his hand thrust out pretending to do who knows what. Your quirk definitely did not depend on you shooting anything.

“I do, too.” Shouto agrees as he manages to pull a blue t-shirt with your Pro-Hero costume printed on it.

“But papa, you’re a Pro-Hero already! Why would you wanna be like mama?”

“She’s amazing.” Shouto simply states and Kaito looks at his dad with curious eyes.

“Papa, are you in love with mama?” Kaito asks as he sticks out his legs for Shouto to put on his shorts and socks.

“Very much so,” Shouto tells his son as he ruffles his hair, “Just like I love you.”

Kaito laughs as he stands up and jumps into Shouto’s arms, “I love you too, papa.”

“Ready for the park?”

“YES!”

⋆✭⋆✭⋆⋆✭⋆✭⋆

Shouto was sitting on a park bench watching as Kaito ran around the playground following a group of slightly older kids. “I’m sorry, but you’re the Pro-Hero: Shouto, correct?” A lady’s voice asked from behind Shouto, and without looking, Shouto nodded his head.

“I am, is there anything you need? Sorry, I’m just looking after my son today.”

“Oh, I know, I was just wanting to see if you would be willing to sign this for my child? He’s a huge fan!”

Shouto looks away from Kaito who was climbing up the jungle gym, standing up to face the mother who was clutching a piece of his merchandise. Smiling gently, Shouto places his signature on the item and returns to sit down.

“You don’t mind if I sit here? It seems that my daughter is playing with your son?”

Shouto’s eyebrows scrunch slightly, “You have a daughter and a son?” He asks looking back to the group of kids Kaito was playing with none of which looked remotely related.

“Uh, yeah, I, um, I do!” She stutters rubbing the back of her head as the two of them sit down on the bench, Shouto watching Kaito look over at him, and he waved.

Shouto allows the lady to sit next to him and he watches as Kaito is coming down the slide, and his face scrunches up as it normally does before he needs to sneeze, except it’s not just a sneeze. Shouto watches as Kaito sneezes, fire emitting from his body and burning the asphalt of the playground, Kaito shrieked and moved his hands around and the emitted fire followed the movement of his hands.

“PAPA!!! HELP ME!!” Kaito bellowed as parents immediately raced to their children as the flames seemed to grow in Kaito’s anxiety and fear. Shouto is already by Kaito’s side, ice emitting from his footsteps to counteract the flames that were set as Kaito sobs.

“Are you okay, Kaito-kun?” Shouto asks as he quickly examines his son for any potential injury.

“I JUST SNEEZED OUT FIRE!” Kaito wailed as his hands went to cover his eyes. “AND NOW I CAN NEVER EVER SNEEZE AGAIN!”

Shouto had to bite his tongue to keep himself from laughing at Kaito, “I don’t think that’s true…”

“I’m gonna be mama’s sidekick with a quirk called sneezing fires!” Kaito complained as tears continued to flow down his face, and Shouto paused feeling his old self reflected in the troubles of Kaito.

“You know what my quirk is, right?” Shouto asks as he sinks to the floor of the playground, Kaito looking up at Shouto as he sniffled loudly. Kaito nodded his head as his hand touched the scar on Shouto’s face.

“Half cold-half hot.”

Shouto nodded as he opened his left palm and demonstrated to Kaito a small wisp of fire that danced gently across his palm. “I have a fire, just like you. You wanna know a secret?”

Kaito’s eyes brightened, he did love secrets, and Shouto grinned back at his smiling toddler, “Okay, my secret is that I used to hate my fireside.”

This causes confusion to hit Kaito’s face, his fingers going to touch the flame that gently swirled in a hypnotic dance. “But you’re so strong, papa, how could you hate your fire?”

Shouto paused, noticing the audience nearby watching a rare moment of a Pro-Hero discussing the hardships of his childhood in public, “I thought I would hurt someone with it, become someone I wasn’t, but with the help of your mama and Midoriya-san, I’ve come to love my fire. I think you’ll love yours as well.”

Kaito stares at his father with a newfound love, one that was forged when two people endured the same hardships with their thoughts of their quirks. “I’ll love my quirk if you love yours.” Kaito compromises, sticking his pinky out for him to seal this secret between the two of them.

“Deal.”

Later that day, “Pro-Hero: Shouto, saves son from himself!” was the biggest news of the day.

⋆✭⋆✭⋆⋆✭⋆✭⋆

Shouto stood in the kitchen preparing for dinner as Kaito sat coloring in front of him, casual singing some theme song Shouto knew by heart. Shouto heard his phone ring, but since he was in the middle of cooking the salmon, he asked Kaito to retrieve the phone.

Kaito skipped over to Shouto’s phone, picked up, and put it to his ear. “Hello? What do you want, this is Kaito!”

Shouto smiled softly as his son who was using two hands to hold the phone to his ear, although he wasn’t sure if it was upside down or not. Kaito’s face lightened only by 100% and hearts only seemed to manifest in his eyes, and Shouto knew exactly who was on the other end of the call.

“MAMA, I GOT MY QUIRK TODAY! MY QUIRKY! JUST LIKE PAPA! PAPA EVEN LET ME IN ON A SECRET!” Kaito shrieked excitedly, always one to be excited to have you on the phone. “Yes mama, I didn’t get hurt! Hello, I’m a big boy with a quirk.”

Shouto flipped the salmon as he watched Kaito walking over towards him, the phone still clutched to his ear, “Well now I can be a Pro-Hero, like you and papa, and I can save you and take care of you! But yeah, here’s papa, bye! I love you.”

Kaito handed Shouto the phone, who took it with ease watching as Kaito went back to his spot to color. “Hello?” Shouto finally said after Kaito managed to climb up the chair safely.

“Why hello there my beautiful husband,” your voice immediately responds and Shouto smirks slightly.

“You jealous?”

“YOU KNOW I AM!”

“Mm. I don’t blame you, it was just as good as his first steps.”

“Don’t sound so smug!” You complained through the phone, your voice seeming defeated.

“I’m not,” Shouto laughs at your fretting as he reaches out a hand to assist Kaito with his juice box.

“I guess I’ll believe your deceptions, anyways I’m glad it happened during his school break and not during class! Could you imagine the chaos that would’ve happened if he lit the school on fire?!”

“I can only imagine, we’ll have to take him to the doctors on Friday for the actual diagnosis,” Shouto says regarding the naming of Kaito’s quirk.

“Yeah, agreed! I already made an appointment.” You inform Shouto.

“Oh?”

“Yeah! Sorry!! I was going to go anyways, and I called again to add Kaito! Also, your ass looks great today babe, I saw all the photos of the park incident.”

“Wait why do you need to go to the doctors—?”

“MAMA!” Kaito yells overly excited as Shouto watches the four-year-old scrambling off the chair and running full speed at you as you entered the house.

“Hi, my baby!” Your joyful voice rings through the house, and Shouto ends the call as he watches you, still dressed up in your costume, clutch the red-headed son close to your body as you twirled around with him in your arms.

“I got my quirk today, and it’s like papa’s, uh, his, right side? I think I can’t remember!” Kaito laughs as he throws his head back.

“Left side, baby, left side.” You day grabbing Kaito’s left arm and shaking it so that he can learn once again the difference.

Shouto watches as you walk over Kaito sitting on your waist, and you smile at your husband who presses a gentle kiss on your lips. “Welcome home,” Shouto whispers.

Much to his surprise, you rise back up to capture Shouto’s lips into another kiss, and the two of you stand there taking a long and high-emotional kiss. Shouto pulls away after hearing the sixth long sigh from Kaito who immediately wrapped his arms around your neck.

“See,” Shouto whispered to your blushing face. “We Todoroki’s are mama’s boys.”

When the three of you are finished eating dinner, which was delicious by the way, and you had changed into much more casual clothing, you all went to the backyard to play some soccer as Kaito insisted he had learned a new trick he wanted to show you. The three of you played soccer together for what felt like hours, the teams, rules, and scores always changing.

Nearing the end of the final match, Shouto had you thrown over his shoulder as he was chasing down Kaito who had abandoned all rules of soccer and was carrying the ball to the goal. “Come here Kaito-chan!” Shouto bellows softly, running at a pace quick enough to be a threat to the toddler's pace and step size, but not quick enough to catch him.

“Save me, Kaito-chan!” You cried out between laughter as you held on tightly to Shouto’s back.

Shouto smacks your butt softly as a sign that your laughter is a bit too obvious, and you pathetically kick your legs in rebuttal. “Mama, is he seducing you?!” Kaito asks shocked, he had thrown the ball far away and was circling behind to look directly into your flushed face.

“SEDUCING?!” The two parents spluttered as they had no idea how their four-year-old had that sort of vocabulary in his set. A grin broke out on Kaito’s face and then he went and grabbed your hands.

“Alright, papa, let's beat mama!” Kaito roared and Shouto shouted back in agreement as suddenly your sides were being tickled and your shrieks of laughter echoed through the quiet night.

“Goodnight, my beautiful boy.” You whisper to Kaito as you pressed a kiss to his forehead, his arms wrapping around your neck softly as he didn’t want to let go just yet. “I love you so much.”

“I love you, too, mama,” Kaito whispered, yawning heavily as you stood up. Shouto replaced you at the side and went to hug and kiss Kaito, who at that very moment remembered something.

Kaito, momentarily renewed with energy grabbed the piece of paper he had been secretively drawing on and thrust it forward towards Shouto, “This is us, papa! We are gonna save the world together with our fire.”

Shouto looked down at the two circle people with red fire everywhere, and he smiled softly at the written Kaito and Papa under the people as well as the drawn hearts. “Goodnight, Kaito-chan, I, uh, well, I love you so much. Thank you for this drawing, I’ll cherish it forever.” Shouto says as he pulls his son's forehead in for a kiss.

“I love you, too, papa. So much….”

You watched on with tears in your eyes for the amount of love that you could feel between the father of your child and said, child. Shouto eventually stood up, and with an arm wrapped around your waist, the two of you left while turning off the lights.

Shouto showed you the drawing as the two of you retreated to your bedroom, the overall feeling in the house right now was overwhelming love and joy. “Wow, you two are in fact the reason why I live every day.” You say as you hopped onto the bed, Shouto climbing on seconds afterward, his head on your chest as he held you close.

“I’m glad,” Shouto confesses feeling the same way as you did as he sighs softly.

“Um, Shoucchan?” You say softly, and Shouto hums in acknowledgment, too comfortable right now to even dare look at you even if he wanted to. “Well, uh, you see I have- I have something to confess…”

“You’re pregnant again, right?” Shouto says taking your overall hesitation to say what he had gathered from your doctor's appointment, refusal of a glass of alcohol, your early release home, and of course the unprotected sex that happened a few couples of times weeks ago.

“I am…”

Shouto sits up, watching your face swim with millions of emotions as in parallel to the first time you confessed. A smile covers his face and yours breaks out in one as well as far tears roll down both your cheeks, and another kiss is placed between the two of you, “Oh, I’m so glad.” He whispers against your lip as he places his warm hand against your stomach.

sorry, ive fallen in love with kaito and i cant get up D: requests are open still!!!

[baby-bearie]

3 am - D.S.

a/n: i definitely posted this before, but for some reason it has disappeared off of the face of tumblr, so here it is again. actually one of my favorite imagines.

it was insane. everything felt insane.

everything feels insane in the ungodly hours of the morning.

but here you both were, at 2:49 am, standing in front of andrew's house.

andrew was never a good boyfriend. no, he wasn't ever violent. but the most common pains are never physical. he hurt you. he acted like you barely even existed, ditched you for his friends or for other girls he insisted he was just friends with, and was rather possessive about who you hung out with. that was what ultimately led to your break-up. andrew was always jealous. often unrealistically, but he was jealous of daniel, your best friend. in the past, andrew had succeeded in convincing you that your friends were against you, and got you to even push a few good people out of your life. but the line was drawn when it came to daniel. so when andrew started telling you that daniel was no good for you, you instead began to question if andrew was no good for you.

funny enough, it was him who broke up with you.because he assumed that you were messing around with daniel. heated words were exchanged, and he called it. you were upset from the fight, but subconsciously relieved because you had begun to realize that andrew was the real problem.

but that didn't mean you weren't heartbroken. it still hurt as much as any other break-up. so you went to your best friend, daniel.

at 8 pm, you were at his house. the second he saw your blotchy cheeks and red nose at his door his expression changed from confusion to concern.

"hey, hey, whoa. why are you crying?" he tugged you into his apartment and closed the door behind.

"a-andrew broke up with me." you reached up to wipe away your tears.

"oh, god. what a dick." daniel ran a hand through his hair.

daniel might have seemed averagely calm to the untrained eye, but you had known him for too long. the way his foot began tapping as if he needed to do something, the tiny bit of extra force with which he threw up his hands. he was angry.

"yeah, i know. it's okay, im okay."

"c'mon let's get your mind off it."

and daniel had really tried to force you to forget. the two of you baked, binged and bawled. well, you bawled and daniel sat there comforting you, hating andrew with a passion.

at about 11pm, you decided you might as well stay the night at daniel's since you were gonna be back tomorrow morning for more moral support.

however, at 12:30 am you were still awake, lying on daniel's bed. daniel had, as usual, insisted you have the bed and he went to sleep on the couch. but judging by the shuffling noises coming from the living room, he wasn't asleep either. you laid awake for a little longer until finally drifting off at 12:57.

at 2:09, your eyes snapped open. your feeling of restlessness from the night was replaced with a subtle anger. you felt the need to punch a wall and scream-cry. you wanted to even the playing field. you barely hesitated to question the feeling before tiptoeing down the hall to the couch, where daniel sprawled. he laid on his back, his long limbs were awkwardly sprawled out over the couch.

you lightly nudged his shoulder, causing him to shift his position, almost slapping you as he did.

"dani. daniel, wake up."

daniel's eyes fluttered open to you hovering above him, brows furrowed and hair spilling over your shoulders.

he groaned a bit. "(y/n), what time is it?"

his voice was groggy, and your heart beat a bit faster.

you ignored that.

you looked up to see the clock and looked back down at him, smiling sympathetically. "2 am."

"2 am?!" daniel groaned, turning back into the couch to sleep, rolling into his blanket.

"daniiii, come on!" you whined, trying and failing to roll him back over. when you got no response, you grabbed the blanket and yanked it out from under him. the boy inside tumbled out onto the carpet and you stood above him.

"c'mon. let's go."

"where?"

"anywhere."

at 2:20 am, daniel had not been expecting to be climbing into the driver seat of his car. this was one of many surprises that night.

the first was, of course, (y/n) showing up at his apartment with blotchy cheeks, crying about her pathetic excuse of a boyfriend.

the second was the hurt he felt for her, the need to take away her pain, to make the hurt stop.

the third surprise of the night was the anger he slowly built up. the anger that anyone could treat her the way andrew did. daniel was such a calm person, so why the sudden urge to smack down andrew?

all these emotions overwhelmed daniel, who was growing more and more awake as he drove (y/n) around aimlessly, hoping she'd tell him what was going on.

but the fourth surprise happened in the morning, at 2:34 am when daniel glanced over at (y/n) to see her leaning her head on the window, smiling gently. the moonlight barely illuminated her as it reflected off the window and daniel felt one of the biggest surprises of his life.

he was in love with his best friend.

taking a few deep breaths, daniel ripped his eyes off the girl next to him and set them back on the road ahead. clearing his throat he asked for the fourth time.

"where are we going?"

"turn left."

he turned.

"(y/n) seriously, wh"-

"turn left again."

"wait a second are we"-

"turn right."

(y/n) went to get out of the car, but daniel was quick to lock the doors.

"what are we doing here?" daniel turned to look at you and you turned away, failing to notice the slight change in the way he looked at you.

"andrew's going to have what he deserves."

"god, (y/n), have you thought this out at all?" daniel threw his head back, covering his face with his hands.

"of course i have, that's why there's eggs in the backseat."

"huh- what?" daniel whipped around in his seat, craning over to see two cases of eggs sitting in the back seat. he turned back to you, who was smiling as you reached over him to unlock the doors.

"let's go, you big baby."

daniel groaned but stepped out of the car, reaching into the back to get the egg cases.

you both stood on the lawn. he held the eggs above your head when you reached for them.

"before i give you these, are you entirely sure that you want to do this?"

you rolled your eyes at him.

"yes, mom. i hate how tall you are."

he smiled and handed you an egg case. the two of you turned to face the large face of the house.

2:49 am

and now here you were, standing in front of andrew's house, with a boy who you knew would do anything for you.

"you get the front and i'll get the sides." he whispered.

and he was gone.

2:56 am

you both stood in front on your masterpiece, admiring it.

"he always was an egghead." you whispered.

daniel chuckled at that.

he turned to face you as you scanned the house for missed spots.

2:57 am

"dani, stop staring, it's creepy." you spoke without even looking at him.

he smiled at the ground, shaking his head.

you laughed and took his hand, pulling him towards the car.

2:58 am

you sat in the car, but daniel wasn't preparing to back out. you waited patiently, looking out the window at the streetlights.

2:59 am

"(y/n)."

"yeah?" you turned to look at daniel and the sight almost startled you.

his eyes sparkled with a new intensity you'd never seen. he was barely a couple inches away from you and you could feel his breath dust your face.

daniels eyes searched yours for any signs of you stopping, of you not wanting this, but you seemed to lean in a bit more.

3 am

daniel's lips met yours and you melted. it was one moment that seemed to stretch into millions. if love poems and love songs were a moment, this was that moment. you could feel him smiling into the kiss and you smiled back.

a light flicked on.

you and daniel jerked apart, wide eyes looking up at the house. the top window was open, and bright light flooded out.

"hey! you! hey!"

you and daniel looked at each other.

3:01 am

"DRIVE, YOU IDIOT, DRIVE!"

tags: @annabseavey @coolkidcorbyn @anxious-avery @danieldelicate @babyzacharyy @perfectlyseavey @seqveydaniel @zachheroin @katie-avery @5sos-seavey

[kaeleetheselkie-blog]

A short Solinh Fic

Sophie sighed dreamily, completely blocking out the useless droning of her Elvin History mentor. Usually she was diligent, really. But this was the only session she had with this… this angel. She chuckled softly, knowing that only she would even understand the human compliment in the lost cities. It was true though, Linh was and always had been such an ethereal being, not just in appearance but in character. Her kindness, her gentleness, her humility, her impossibly considerate nature- not to mention she was perhaps the most talented hydrokinetic of her generation. Sophie sighed again, the girl’s long hair had been gathered into a large bun at the top of her head, that fell loose in feathery strands around her face. Sophie’s heart skipped a beat as the angel tucked a thin tendril behind her ear. Linh was absolutely, positively, indisputably the most beautiful thing that ever graced this green earth. Yeah, Sophie was whipped. Something that the freckled boy sitting next to her knew very well, and thus made fun of her for perpetually. “Soph! You’re drooling again!” He whispered in her ear. “I am?” She gasped snapping out of her daze and frantically wiping her mouth. “I am not!” She realized, and slapped his shoulder. Dex only snickered. “I’ll get you back for that!” She told him, pouting. “Yeah. Okay. Whatever.” He replied, dimples still visible on his now rather chiseled features. Something that the girls at school hadn’t failed to notice, he got as many crush cuffs as Fitz and Keefe these days. Sophie had teased him mercilessly about it for months. She couldn’t help feeling proud of her best friend, though. She felt like the crazy mom screaming for her son at a little league baseball game. “Seriously.” Sophie said, a blush already forming on her face. “Wow. That’s impressive. Even Wonderboy made you blush this much.” He snickered. Sophie punched him. “Sure he did.” Sophie said defensively. But she knew it was true. She loved her gorgeous cognate like a brother, but he didn’t have anything on her angel. “Mr. Diznee! Ms. Foster! Do you have something you’d like to share with the class?” The mentor snapped, annoyedly. The prodigies in question jumped. “N-no, sir.” Sophie managed. Great, now Linh was looking at her, she didn’t care what Elwin told her about the infinite nature of the Elvin lifespan, she could feel herself aging faster. “Then could either of you tell me how this particular event we were speaking of, before you so rudely interrupted, helped to shape the world we know today?” Sophie did more than that, actually, she recited about five textbook paragraphs-worth of information before concluding the speech with an eloquent thesis. Dex smirked throughout the entire spoken essay. Sophie didn’t really want to know what Linh was doing. “A-alright, then. Y-you heard her class, she’s obviously studied very well.” The mentor said, baffled. Sophie was surprised any of her mentors tried to catch her off guard any more. She had reached the level of know-it-all-ness that she had maintained in the Forbidden Cities, and that was saying something.

A scoff sounded throughout the lecture hall; Stina. “More like she memorized the entirety of the subject matter. Sir, this is outrageous. Why is she even here? She already knows everything!” Despite having gotten more accustomed to Stina’s ways, the way the bully said “everything,” made her blood boil. Stina was still so childish, and it got on Sophie’s nerves. “ ‘Outrageous’ is a bit of an exaggeration don’t you think?” The voice sent fire shooting through Sophie’s veins. It was Linh, it was her angel coming to her rescue. “Sophie may retain information in such a way that makes the rest of us look like idiots, but that’s beyond her control. It’s not like she’s being arrogant,” she sent a pointed look to Stina, “she didn’t even do anything wrong.” Sophie’s heart glowed, or that might of been her face catching fire. Either way, she felt her love for the angel swell in her chest like an ocean. “Besides,” Linh continued, “from what I understand, Sophie’s always been an exception, you'd think you’d’ve gotten used to it by now.” The euphoria ended immediately. “Exception”. Sophie felt her face catch fire for a whole new reason. She was an “exception” to Linh. She felt tears prick at her eyes, why did she ever think Linh would be different? She saw her like everyone else did; like an exception, like the ‘moonlark’, like a freak. Even her cognate, even her best friends saw her that way- even Edaline and Grady. Always saying how proud they were of her, or joking about how they “saved her ass that one time”- she had become like the golden statues in the Goblin capital- unmoving and glimmering on a pedestal. It was humiliating, and that made her angry. “On the contrary,” Sophie shot up out of her seat, “the council’s given me a number of cases to work on- my cognate and I are also expected to perform a healing later tonight. I feel this time could be more well spent if I could work on those, sir.” “You don’t expect him to just let you waltz out of class, do you?” Stina sneered. “I was simply contributing to a conversation directly concerning myself. I think that’s justified. I don’t claim to be privy to my mentor’s thoughts, Stina, as I know you wouldn’t either.” She couldn’t help but think she’d started sounding too much like Alden. Stina only glared at her in silence. “I s-suppose as a ‘junior keeper’, or whatever it is they call you and your lot now… you would have extra responsibilities. Perhaps I should let you use this time more efficiently. You are the moonlark after all.” Sophie resisted the urge to wince at her pseudonym. “Very well, Ms. Foster. Go work on your projects somewhere close to the lecture hall where you won’t disturb the other sessions.” 

The mentor’s smile was friendly, but Sophie couldn’t bring herself to care. She let out a clipped, “Thank you, sir,” and began to gather her supplies. Dex gave her a concerned look, but it only earned him a “See you,” before she turned and walked purposefully out into the hallway. A few minutes later she was crying in the garden outside the silver tower. She felt pathetic. She shouldn’t still be crying over this, she’d always been a freak. Always. Lost cities or not. Why hadn’t she hardened herself against it yet? Why? Why did it still have to hurt so much? And then she realized, it wasn’t being called a freak it was being called a freak by Linh. Linh had full dominion over her, and she still couldn’t bring herself to hate it. So all she could do was cry, as hard as she had when she had first come here. And then… it got worse. So, so infinitely worse. “Sophie?” The girl in question nearly jumped out of her skin at the sound of that voice. “L-linh…” The moonlark couldn’t even bring herself to look her angel in the face. “S-sorry… I was just…well…uh-“ “You were crying.” And there it was again. That gentleness that transcended any kind of physical attraction Sophie felt towards the hydrokenetic. That kindness, that endless compassion. Sophie’s heart ached for her angel, and it hurt so much that she was angry again. “Yeah! I was! So what? What do you have to do with it?” Sophie snapped finally reaching Linh’s eyes. And… instantly regretted it. Those eyes… those beautiful, beautiful eyes. Like silver. Like a shimmering lake in winter. Sophie couldn’t stop staring, she couldn’t even tear her eyes away and look at Linh’s nose instead like she did with Fitz. She couldn’t even blink. She could only become more and more lost in them. In their depth and sparkling emotion. “I’m sorry….” Sophie whispered. “I’m so sorry….” And she started crying again. She bawled her eyes out, and Linh, being Linh, held the precious moonlark tight to her chest. Immediately forgiving Sophie for her harsh words. “Don’t be sorry.” The angel whispered soothingly. “You’ve done nothing to be sorry for. Nothing, nothing at all.” “Y-yes there is…” Sophie said between bouts of tears. “I-I’m sorry I’m so different. I always bring trouble with me, wherever I go. I-I’m a burden. I-Im sorry… I-I’m sorry I’m a freak, I-I’m an e-exception. I’ll always just be that. I-I’ll always just be…” “Stop!” Sophie gaped at Linh in surprise. She had barely ever heard the angel speak so angrily, even when they were fighting the Neverseen. Line sighed, her eyes full of a kind of pain Sophie couldn’t place. “Sophie, I called you an exception because I think you’re exceptional. Intelligent and courageous and wise.” Linh absent-mindedly tucked a loose strand of hair behind Sophie’s ear. Sophie’s face was on fire again. “You’re a hero and a genius. You’re empathetic…and beautiful.” Here even Linh’s cheeks colored a deep pink. “S-so…you d-don’t hate me?” Sophie hiccuped. Linh just stared at her moonlark at this, something that made Sophie indescribably uncomfortable. In fact, Linh stared so long that Sophie had time to wonder vaguely if class had already ended. But this and every other thought flew out of her mind when Linh’s lips came crashing down and pressed against her own in a chaste kiss. Chaste as it was, the kiss was far from short. When Linh finally pulled away Sophie could only grin and snort and laugh giddily. And Linh, being Linh, kissed her again and again and again, until they went back to their sessions glowing from the inside.

[unknowngirl199424-blog]

Pt. 3

Now being the pretty innocent girl i was. I smoked weed very occasionally. Drank every now and then. But that was it really. I smoked cigs. Stupid choice i made at an even more stupid young age. I was 13 when i tried it. 15 when i started smoking every day. (My parents knew, they didn't care) my younger sister had been smoking for years. She partied a lot. Drank a lot. Smoked a lot. Took a lot of pills. Would steal my moms pain pills that she needed from the back surgeries. Mom would run out at the end of the month and would bawl... Literally wail in pain. And it never stopped my sister. I caught her several times. Id get pissed. Ask her wtf she was doing, or why... But she never stopped. I never told... I was drowning in depression. It started when i was 13. After my grandma passed. I changed... She was my world.

My parents partied ALOT!

Used LOTS of drugs...

Ranging from just weed, to coke, to meth...

The first half of my life... From birth till... 14? I think was when they quit all the hard shit for good. They were just... Mom and dad. I mean i loved them, i respected them, but... I didn't have anything to compare it to. It was normal for me to walk in and see light bulbs just randomly on the coffee table.

It was normal for me to wake my sis up in the morning, helping her get dressed, teeth brushed, food in her belly and out the door waiting on the bus. Every day. We lived in the country about 20 miles from town where our friends were. So all we had was each other. In the summer as soon as the sun started to show, 7:00ish. My parents would rush into our room. One would wake up me while the other would wake my sister. Rush us up and to get dressed and outside. We'd be outside alllllllllll day long in the summer in Oklahoma heat. They'd have friends over and lock the doors. We played. Sometimes the friends would bring their kids and we'd run around and play all day. I was a tom boy. I had scarred bloody knees almost daily from wrecking my bike. Would just walk around the property we lived on. Played with our dogs. Pissed off snakes that liked to live in the barn or chicken coop. I ran a lot. BUT IT WAS NORMAL TO ME. They started to quit when i was 12. Then grandma passed. They started again. Didn't stop for good until mom was hurt and dad was fired for pissing dirty for weed, coke, and meth. He was rehired 6 months later. But shit was rough at the time. So after losing my grandma. I went into myself. She loved me, took care of me. Gave me what i wanted and needed. I basically broke. I was never really an over joyous kid. I was raped and molested by my cousin. And so i always carried pain. But grandma was who made me happy. She passed. And from that point in my life from 13 to 18. I cut a lot. I was emotionless most days. But some days I'd break and cry for hours. For the longest time i thought i was depressed because of grandma. But i realized... Depression is a disease. And once you get a good dose of it, it stays. It twists and folds and wiggles its way into every fibre of your being and clings. And bad things that go on add to it and over time, you are eye level deep terrified you're gonna go under soon and no one will notice. Well over the years shit was added. Once I realised i could.... Not feel the pain and sadness... I latched on. Over time the occasional smoking weed went to every day several times a day. Drinking came up for awhile but i hated feeling like shit the next day so i quit. My ex gave me a pain pill one day.

I realised that not only could i get away from the pain and depression, i could feel fucking amazing while doing so. So it started out ya know. Once a week. Just one. To 2 a week to 4 a week to at least 1 every day. When we went up north. Pills were every where. Drugs in general. And i wanted to experience things. We had fun. Went lots of places. Did lots of things. Parties, festivals, fairs, amusement parks, museums, art museums, craft fairs, art stores, book stores, malls, movie theaters.. Just... it was great. I met her friends. They were like her. We partied a lot. I was soley living in the moment for once instead of striving to please everyone else. It was a stupid choice. But it was my choice. Over the years. The fun with it stopped... it became a nessecity. She got shitty and mean sober and i was just as miserable. I wanted happiness not that. Her dad would give us pain pills every day and muscle relaxers. If we did literally anything for him he'd pay us in pills. My ex was also prescribed pain pills too! We'd go through them so quick and then he'd give them to us so we didn't go through withdrawal. By year 3 (2015) I'm 21. I'm working a few months here a few months there. Living the same daily cycle. My day didn't start until pills were thrown down my throat. The habit got bad. I was to a point i was taking fucking handfulls of pills. Daily. And didn't feel ok until then. The few days i didn't have them, i literally slept all day and all night. I was burying my issues with a dark coping mechanism.

I started falling out of love. I left her once last year and we got back together the next day. I told her she couldn't keep stopping me from leaving because it was making me hate her. She wouldnt let go. We stayed together for 4 months. I broke up with her and moved back to oklahoma the beginning of this year. But she was my comfort. Pills were my comfort. After being here for 4 months i let her come back. It was bad. I got back into pills again and one day i told her i didn't want to be with her anyone. She was here for a month at that point. But she wasn't trying to work. She wouldn't do anything. But look for pills. I told her i was done. She gave me some pills. I didn't know what they were but she told me they were for anxiety. And i was really upset. So i took them. We kept arguing. She kept giving me more. My parents stopped by to drop something off, i guess i was wayyyyy out of it. They leave. The fight blows up. I tell her i want her gone. She kept refusing. Idk what happened. It was like a light switch went off. I went to the kitchen and grabbed a steak knife and sliced my wrist up for the first time ever... I only cut my stomach and thighs as a teen. She came around the corner and saw what i was doing and broke a glass vase i had. She ran over and grabbed the blade. Started yanking it from me. I guess we fought over it pretty hard cuz all i remember was it flying across the room and when i got back 6 days later it was soooo bent up.

She kept going and going and i grabbed a piece of glass and cut, she got it away and i just collapsed to the floor. She tried hugging me. I screamed at her for being toxic for me. To not touch me. To just call my mom. My mom shows up. Its like 11:30 at night at this point and she freaks out. My ex starts shit with her. They argue. I scream at them that they needed to stop and mom took me to the er. I guess by that point i was in and out of consciousness. One thing i do remember was seeing an old teacher that i had from yearrrrs ago when i went to a vocational school to become a certified nurse aid. I really looked up to her at 17. Admired her. She was a Dr there in the er. It was humialting. I cried. I guess i pissed in a cup for em or something. I don't remember. But they told my mom (which i didn't find out till almost a week later) that i was overdosing. That all of what i took hadn't caught up and that's why i was talking really crazy and blacking out. I don't remember. But the next morning i wake up. There was a cop sitting next to my bed. 20 mins later im being handcuffed and put in a cruiser and drove over a hr to a phych place. Guess the dr asked me the night before what would happen if i went home and i said i didn't know. So they legally put me there for 5 days so i couldn't be any harm to myself.

5 good things about being put there.

1. I had no access to pills, alcohol, even cigarettes. So i was very very clear headed. The first time in almost 6 years. Had time to think about where tf my life has landed me.

2. I realized how fucking truly bad our relationship was. And came to the conclusion that if we stayed together. One, if not both of us was gonna end up in a casket. Whether it be from pills or not. It was gonna happen.

3. I realized that i deserved wayyyy better. Relationship wise. Life wise. I deserved someone who could push me in the healthy direction. Make positive choices. I felt like instead of maturing, i was still trapped in an 18 yr olds mentality.

4. I ended it. And that time i meant it. There's nothing she could offer me. That would make me go back. Not a million dollars, not a billion, not even all the stars in the sky. I have nothing for her.

5. I met someone who treats me amazing now. Who pushes me. Keeps me away from the shit. I've been pain pill free for 5 months and its staying that way.

And for once... I'm starting to actually feel happy. Genuinely. I was prescribed anti depressants, anti anxiety, and a sleep disorder med. I stopped taking the anti depressants because they made it worse. But im to the point where the good days finally out weigh the bad. And when the bad come, i roll with it.

For the new year. I have a few goals.

1. Continue all the hard work ive put into myself. Keep eating healthy. Keep exercising. Keep pushing myself forward. No more settling for less what what i truly want.

2. Stay tf away from pain pills. 👍 keep fighting that demon in me who whispers how good I would feel or how one wouldn't hurt...

3. Quit smoking cigs. They're killing me. My lungs hurt all the time.

4. Continue bettering my life. I got away from her for 4 months and i had my own home, vehicle, and a high paying easy job. Brought her back for a month, had a suicidal moment. But she's gone and im in a great relationship. And I'm fucking HAPPY!

5. Quit being so fucking hard on myself. I hate the way i look, i hate my body. But they can be changed. Stress over things that need it but relax more. I'm 24. I still have time.

I STILL HAVE FUCKIN TIME

[garethito]

You know... I've been meaning to ask you about this for a while, and yesterday's tag thing that you did with those Bale gifs only like... fueled? My curiosity? Lol, if that makes sense. Could you like... relive? The Champions League final from this year for us? Like, your perspective on it? Or maybe even the actual whole day of the final? Sorry, God, I know this is weird, but I just love how you tell stories from your life! I have seen you do it with some other anons once!

First of all, THANK YOU SO MUCH for this like, you guys always send me such interesting questions and Im so??? and OMG no this is not weird stop this is such a wonderful question to ask!! And omg you liked how I told the stories to those anons that is so sweet thank you so muchhhhh ❤️❤️💝❤️💘💘💞💞💘

But also this is making me really emotional I dont think I will be able to write this without tearing up but here we go!!! I was at school today and we had a special day so we didnt make any classes, so I had time to formulate an answer to this, and to complete it at home 💞

Quick WARNING?? Yes I am perfectly aware of how crazy and overdramatic this whole story sounds, but the thing is that this is how I truly feel about this day in my life. So yeah lol. Football is basically my life!

I would like to start this by saying that the day of the 26th of May 2018 is the most important day of my entire life as a football fan. There is nothing that could even come close to this. Absolutely nothing. Never in my life have I cried like in that night. Never. Absolutely never. I have looked at my life as a person, at my hardest times, when I cried a lot, but not even that can even slightly compare to the amount of crying that I have done on that glorious day of May 7 months ago. When I say crying, though, I dont actually mean crying, no. I mean violently sobbing, screaming at the top of my lungs, shaking and feeling numb. But in the best way possible, the happiest tears that I ever shedded.

My actual perspective, like you said, though, starts from the 2nd of May, a day after our semi-final second leg against Bayern. From that day, until the 26th, my mind, my body, my soul only thought about the final. I could not even focus on the Clasico on the 6th, neither on the last La Liga match. I was so fucking nervous, words are not sufficient to describe….. At least once every 2-3 days I would go to the bathroom with severe stomach aches and sit there until I would try to calm myself down so that my grandmother wouldnt get worried. I thank God, the Universe, or whoever you think invented life for the fact that highschool had nothing special during that period, just a few tests, that I got the best grades on, because had there been something big, I would have surely failed. That was a nightmare. Just think about it. Horrible La Liga season, then those fucking shaky as fuck second leg matches against Juve AND Bayern. I was literally so pessimistic that I am scaring myself right now thinking about it. All these bad scenarios played through my head ”What if Zizou loses his job? What if this will be the start of our downfall? What if this is the last Champions League final we will play? What if, what if, what if….”. I always tried to tell my brain how stupid I was, that we are Real Madrid and that we will win, like we always do, that we are the best fucking team in the Universe and that nobody even comes close to being like us. But its like these voices in my head wouldnt stop, it was so scary.

Come 25th of May I was an actual lifeless corpse. No matter how much I tried to call my best friend, who was in Bulgaria at that time, and telling her that I cant take this anymore, and her telling me that its going to be okay like it always is, that she doesnt really know my team well but she knows we will win, no matter how much of that was happening, I couldnt fucking stop being nervous and constantly thinking about this match.

On the morning of the 26th I woke up with a severe headache at about 8:30-9 AM. The only things that I remember from that whole day are the constant empty feeling, the amount of times I listened to Hala Madrid Y Nada Mas and the amount of pictures, videos, promotional/support videos I saw and watched. I called my friend one last time and I told her that now I am optimistic, that we will win.

My whole emotional state was ruined, however, by Gareth not starting. I dont need to explain the whole February-May Gaz-Zizou situation because I think everyone knows it too well by now and what I fucking felt about it. I have never been so enraged in my entire life. After all he has done, still no place in the starting XI. Though, this is pretty much the only thing that has ever angered me about Zizou. I love that man too much, I dont think there will ever be a coach that will ever come close to him, a coach that I will ever love as much as I loved him, but this whole situation really, really angered me. As I said, not going to get into details, I think that is enough. Though, I tried to only focus on my hardly achieved positivity about the match. 

The match started and my emotional state reached its lowest point. I couldnt take it anymore, I felt impossibly sick from being so nervous, I got the most severe migraine ever, my eyes were literally about to pop out ugh again, remembering that gives me chills. Dani got injured, and I got angry again, because he didnt deserve it, the World Cup was literally about to start like God give this man a break!!!

Halftime at 0-0, my optimism grew, believe it or not. I felt like we will have more urgency in the second half and that we will win this.

The second half came, with me just desperately hoping for a goal. Because we were playing so well, we deserved a reward!! And it did come, with Benzemas goal, God I felt so relieved and happy. I have seen people saying that his goal was not good but? You literally take everything that is being offered to you in a Champions League final! He scored, he gave us a goal, we were 1-0 up, and I was literally screaming from joy, I was shaking so much and I was the proudest person alive. God, I love my team. Then, Liverpools equalizer came. I didnt think anything of it. I wouldnt get rid of my optimism. I was looking at my boys and I knew we would win.

And Oh My God, here we fucking go. 

Minute 61. Gareth comes on. I was so grateful that he at least got to play 30 minutes, I literally only wanted to see him. At that time, considering everything that was happening, I was already emotionally starting to prepare for his departure to another team. I was watching him in those moments, flashbacks through my mind of all the glorious times I got to see him, all of his goals, everything.

And then…

All of a sudden…

62:58

That moment. The moment in which my soul has definitely left my body. The most beautiful moment I have ever lived in watching football. The moment in which I was the proudest person alive. A moment I will never, ever, ever forget, for as long as I get to live. The moment I have literally seen history being made, right before my eyes. The moment in which I literally evaporated, left the Earth, idk how to explain this but I hope you understand me. My idol, that had suffered so much that season, scored a fucking bicycle kick in a FUCKING UCL FINAL. ARE YOU KIDDING ME. The happiest, most full of joy, best, most emotional moment. Ever. No exaggeration.

My perspective on this? Oh well, brace yourselves. If you think everything that I have written so far seems insane, get ready for this.

I was on my bed, watching the game, shaking. I saw the passes, beautiful passes, that ended up with Marcelo controling the ball (incredibly, as he always does, my Brazilian sunshine). I saw him swaying to the side, and then passing a high, aerial ball in the box. Gareth came up to meet it, with… a scissor kick. That he scored. I literally fucking exploded like there is no other word. I jumped off my fucking bed and I ran literally across the house and came back, making the most inhuman noises ever I swear. I came back to my bedroom and I collapsed on the floor and I literally started fucking bawling my eyes out, and even that seems like an understatement. Screaming at the top of my lungs, bawling my eyes out, literally all of it happening on the floor. My grandmother literally came in and she thought something happened to me, but then I just pointed to the screen and she understood lmao. And from that point onward I cannot say anything anymore, because I dont remember anything else but me on the floor, literally. After like 15 minutes I hardly even managed to get back on the bed, and guess what?

82:41

AGAIN. 

A

G

A

I

N

???? I dont know what to say anymore. Like he literally toyed with everyone that night, he didnt care about anything. Again, with a pass from Marcelo, he literally goes from FAR FAR FAR away and he shoots and… scores?? How much do you think my poor fragile self can handle? Like, WHAT THE FUCK DO YOU SAY TO THAT?? Except for bawling your eyes out even more, if thats even possible? Its been 7 months and I still dont have words for what happened that night, like 2 goals ARE YOU KIDDING ME??? LIKE DO YOU UNDERSTAND I WAS LITERALLY DEAD LIKE ??? I LOST EVERY SINGLE BIT OF MY SANITY THAT NIGHT. 2 goals, 2 goals in 20 minutes, he was about to get a fucking hattrick. A fucking HATTRICK IN HALF AN HOUR, but Karius unfortunately stopped that shot.

The match ended and… I dont remember anything other than barely seeing the screen, I literally had a blurred vision.

We fucking won it. We DID IT. THE DECIMOTERCERA WAS OURS.

In the moment in which Sergio lifted it I… I dont have words, did I go into another Universe, did I ascend, did my soul leave my body I dont even know but what I do know is that I spent the rest of the night, up until like 6AM, crying my heart out. And this is what I mean by ”I have never cried so much in my entire life”. Like I have never spent a whole night crying.

I went to bed at like 6:30, woke up at like.. 10?? I think you can imagine how I woke up, I literally felt like I was going to die but I spent the rest of the day catching up on everything that happened the entire night.

And then, of course, the celebrations, Cibeles, Bernabeu… of course your sensitive girl bawled her eyes out again lol!

Every day ever since it happened, I have always been thinking about this day. About all of it. No point in counting how many times I rewatched the goals lol! But I think you can imagine haha 💘

So yeah, this is pretty much it DSLKFDKJFKDFJKDFK. The story about my best ever day of watching football I made it unecessarily long (Im so sorry). I think the only conclusion that I can get from this is Hala Madrid Y Gareth Y Nada Mas lol! 💘💘

[evil-writer]

@the-feminine-grotesque replied to your post “lol every time choi b*n do opens his mouth i hate him a little more....”

it's not about redemption. that indicates that he needs to be redeemed. he doesnt. it's their marriage that needs to be repaired. the thing is even if u sympathize more with jinjoo and dislike ban do (totally fair), he is not the sole reason they broke up. nor did they break up cuz their was no love there anymore, it was because love was crushed under the weight of their responsibilities. leading to both feeling alone, exhausted, neglected/underappreciated and miserable

idk how far in u are, so this might be smth that becomes more clear later on, or u just disagree completely to the very end. but yeah i like this drama cuz while yeah its about them finding their way back to each other it's even more about them getting to right the things int he past that left them with regrets, it's about figuring out where things went wrong in their lives and in their marriage, it's about reconciling their memories with what the reality of their past 

actually was. and ofc they get to actually know more about the people they had as a "first love". ep 5 was an interesting perspective on the nature of "first love" and what it actually means. and ofc then u have the shadow of the death of jinjoo's mother in the future which likely put a huge strain on their relationship esp if jj blames bd for it on some level. sorry im not trying to come in here and tell you how to feel about the drama or anyone in it i swear!

just wanted to give a different perspective. i dont like when ban do insults jinjoo but she's also pretty cutting with him. and more importantly idt either fully understands what pain they were going thru or how hard those words are hitting. i sympathize more with jinjoo definitely, part of that is jang nara is just KILLING it and has the eyes of a lost baby dear, and part of that is that unlike ban do she experienced a crushing loss with her mother's death.

i have more to say but i will refrain until i know how far along in the show you are (that assumes u want to hear more from me ofc. if u dont i will understand and stop here)

just fyi, i love your wall of text comments, and am always honoured to be a recipient of them. your perspectives are so insightful, and are always welcome! (lowkey they validate my stupid screaming into the void a lil bit so i’m always happy whenever tumblr deigns to notify me lolol).

i was actually not very far into the drama when i made the original post. it was something like early ep 3, probably? in any case, i’ve watched up to episode 5 right now and i can understand ban do. i can understand that he was in as much pressure as jin joo, if not more so (in terms of the future timeline). with my background and family, i more than understand the social pressures he faced. but while i understand his position, i still can’t help disliking him. 

for the most part, i’m able to separate the drama-digesting part of my brain from the part that deals with the rest of my life. but then a drama like go back couple will come along and go down the other pipe, and i’ll be watching with the full weight of the emotional baggage that comes with RL tara (as opposed to Tumblr User evil-writer). and the life jin joo had pre-time travel is my worst nightmare. it’s not even just the bits before their divorce. it’s that she had little to no life outside her duties as mom and wife. it’s that she didn’t have that luxury. i can’t stomach watching her go back to that. 

(her calling ban do stingy miser comes to mind here. was she right to call him that? no. but from where i stand, that comes from a deep-rooted anger at their whole financial situation, and while it’s not nice, it’s understandable.)

for dramas like this one, my overall feelings towards a character tend to be constructed by a first impression. and mine re: ban do involved him watching tv while seo jin bawled in front of the bathroom door, making it so that jin joo couldn’t even have a minute to do her business. many things happened after that, of course, but it’s the first thing that sprung to mind while jin joo broke down on the street crying for seo jin; how’s ban do doing? 

in the meantime, ban do was focused on how he could stay in the past (current time? idk i’m still confused about how this time travel works). he loves seo jin. there’s no doubt in my mind about that. but he has to be reminded that he has a child. 

see, the way i interpret it, ban do is immature. maybe a little too immature to be a family man. it’s this i was referring to when i said redemption, so i probably phrased it badly. after the initial “wow i’m back in my 20s” wore off, his gut reaction was to go after his first love. and yeah, of course, he has a right to explore that what-if. but if jin joo is breaking down in the streets because she misses her son, is it wrong to expect him to actually...remember on his own, that he has a son?

but also it’s his attitude towards jin joo. it’s his constantly back-handedly calling her ugly. it’s that i can’t accept, ignore or even understand. it’s the “why tf would he like you?” attitude. it’s the “there’s no way he thought you’re pretty” attitude. it’s that he’s allowed to dismiss jin joo (scene in the lecture hall) but when she does the same to him, he does the Wrist Grab. it’s the “you can’t do better than me, but i settled” attitude. which jin joo may or may not be guilty of as well. but the way i see it, her name calling and hurting him comes from a place of extreme frustration at their financial situation, and at the state of her life. she said pre-time travel that her regret was not studying a little harder, and not becoming a prosecutor. 

his involved his first love. 

maybe i’m oversimplifying him. maybe i’m a little too unforgiving. i can’t help it. it’s RL tara projecting her anxiety. and she’s a crazy bitch. i need jin joo to fix her life so that she’s never as miserable as she was pre-time travel. i need her to cultivate that career. and with ban do the way he is--heart in the right place, but so immature, i don’t think she can do that with him in her life. but again, it’s very much me as a person. 

(the same person that’s always angry about the way sung na jeong was treated by both the writing and the fandom, but that’s another story entirely.)

[silentmight]

BTS LIVE Trilogy Episode III the WINGS TOUR in Bangkok 2017

Sometimes, all it takes is a little faith and the wings you never knew you had will fly.

About a week and a half ago I YOLO’ed to Bangkok for BTS’ Wings Tour, and it’s a decision I absolutely have no regrets on. Just gonna keep this here as a diary post and concert impression of sorts!

The BTS Wings Tour in Bangkok holds special meaning for me in many ways, but I'll get to that later.

I haven't been to a concert this massive, no not even the local rock bands and gigs I attended while in Singapore can rival this full house of screaming fangirls. Queuing was intense and really stuffy, as Bangkok's weather can really fry you but thankfully I met up with Fonnoi (the girl I bought my ticket from; I randomly saw her post on FB) and then joined her for the concert!

I HAVE ABSOLUTELY NO REGRETS PAYING FOR THE STANDING TICKET. We positioned ourselves to the back and could learn against the guard rails, which makes for good viewing cause everyone crammed to the front and I'm glad my height's at an advantage here lol :3 Also I guess I must be old because I was on energy saving mode until the lights went off; the younger fans were all screaming when their bias appeared on screen when they played the MVs to pass time.

As an introduction, they played Spring Day’s MV and when the first verse kicked in I started tearing… IN FACT I WAS SILENTLY CRYING THROUGHOUT MANY SONGS, PLEASE DON'T JUDGE ME idk man this is the first time I've cried multiple times during a concert because you can feel the atmosphere and I just have too many FEELINGS.

The boys came on stage and kicked off with Not Today- great way to get the crowd pumping and it's also my fav (hell all of it is). The playlist is pretty much faithful to the one listed on the wiki, you can go check it out there… Hearing Bapsae and DOPE live is such a treat. Anyway I'm, so very glad to be able to watch the BTS boys perform their solo songs from the Wings album, coupled with visuals and stage props that are reflective of their personality and song.

Jungkook’s ‘Begin’ displayed his smooth dancing, which felt like a silent sort of strength. Right after was Jimin's ‘Lie’, which holy shit I've been waiting to watch in person ever since this kid became my no.2… I cannot explain in words how 色っぽい sexy it is, goddamnit! Stop attacking my heart! I cannot fathom how Jimin can look like a marshmallow one minute and then like a wolf!! *tears hair out* My favourite part of the dance was when he was blindfolded onwards /COUGH and when he was lifted into the air by the backup dancers too.

And then… my angel Min Yoongi, aka SUGA’s solo. I usually am unable to listen to 'First Love’ because he outputs a ton of intense emotions when he raps, so when I'm stressed I skip it. Hearing it live is no shortage of his raw feelings, and just listening to him rap it live is truly amazing.

The singer line then performed Lost and Save Me, in which during Lost they started to walk all over stage and I'm glad I… am just less than 10 feet away from them… just seeing Jimin sing live, I can die happy. OH and after this was 'I NEED U', aka the one song that I love to butcher with @hweiro and @wataksampingan in the car. Their pronunciation of “I need you gurrrr” hasn't changed IRL either lol.

Rapmon’s solo really did it for me. The introduction was of him looking at a whale, and this is just my assumption: Was he looking at the loneliest whale in the world? Which he wrote Whalien 52 in the previous album? Is it an allusion to himself, because we all know his song 'Reflection’ is melancholic by nature? As the song progressed, it felt like some deep acid trip going through the ocean and the universe and finally Rapmon ends it by walking into an elevated phone booth… however hearing him repeat, “I wish I could love myself” with the concert visuals truly struck a deep chord within. I don't have a deep soul like him but I can resonate with the feeling of looking at life pass you by, you want to love yourself but it's hard as fuck.

V's “Stigma” was next, sorry my attention here died a bit so I don't remember much lol. The last two solos had me in a silent tearing mess though- J-Hope and Jin. J-Hope is SUCH a good performer, his stage charisma is great and we're treated to his childhood photos as he sang ’MAMA’. He had a long pause before finishing off the song, but in that last verse, he sang it with the intensity of his gratitude and love for his mother I just.. my eyelids were like a leaky tap okay. You can totally see the look of admiration and adoration when he looked up after the song ended. J-HOPE!!! ;____;

Jin… oh Jin. It took me so long to appreciate 'Awake’, but after watching him perform live, I see this song in a new light. He and the violinists/cellists were on individual raised platforms, while the backdrop is pretty simple. It felt like a dreamy sky, and on the front of the platforms were projected feathers. Tbh, from what I know of Jin is that he was mainly the visual, who can't really sing or dance so people were like, why is he even there? And perhaps Jin himself feels it too, being the oldest in the group. The line “Maybe I can, can never fly… I Can't fly like the flower petals over there” just struck me of that train of thought.

But to me, Jin, at that very moment you're flying- flying so high and you could touch the sky.

Feelings of inadequacy and yet wanting to keep on keeping on resonates too much within. This song really punched me in the gut and I was trying to not sniffle (and guess what my eyeliner didn't run lmao)

'Cypher 4’ was the rapper line just doing their thing and going wild, then next was FIRE. OMG I've waited so long to also see this dance in person and also sing along T_Tbbb The next couple of songs had them singing yet running all over stage and I took the opportunity to sneak some photos lol but I'm sad that Suga didn't really come to our side of the stage 🙁 Speaking of Suga, this fella is really funny... as for most of his rap lines he just held his mic up and let the audience fill it in woi wwwwww

I managed to sneak some photos of Jimin as he came over to our side of the pen during ‘LOST’- when the singer line started walking around.

Anyway, I have also been looking forward to the main dances of the night: J-Hope’s insane solo for ‘Boy Meets Evil’ and finally, ‘Blood Sweat and Tears’ in the FLESH. I love BST a lot so getting to see it live is just too much for my heart to take.. even with Wings Outro right after. Tbh I wanted to jump up and down like at a rave party with this song (and Dope/Fire) but.. no one else was doing so.. guess no one jumps at a kpop concert lmfao

I got to see everyone up close though, in particular Jimin, J-Hope, V, Jungkook and Rapmon. Damn, Rapmon gave a flying kiss to the small area of 4-5 i was squashed in and the girl in the front went BERSERK. lol Jimin also high 5’ed a very lucky person!

After a short intermission, they returned with ”There Will Be Better Days” and I was already expecting to bawl at this song because of how easy you can sing along to the lyrics (and their meaning), and fucking bawl I did! Before performing this song Rapmon was like, don't be sad, we'll walk together always in our hearts and towards better days always and damn, I'm moved. I could mainly understand whatever RM was saying cause he's the only one speaking in English haha…

Last song of the night was 'Spring Day,’ which was a fitting end to the entire concert. And with that, the Wings Tour has come to an end.

If I didn't take leap of faith in messaging a total random stranger, who is now a concert goer and new found friend, I would never experience this. People precaution one against randomly asking and buying something from online strangers but if I never spotted Fonnoi’s post on the IME thread, I would never have this experience. I've been shown so much hospitality and warmth throughout, and I'm glad we could establish that trust. I'm really thankful to her for selling the ticket at an ok price!

I guess this concert and trip alone fulfills one of my small dreams; to YOLO to another country solely for a concert and to also solo travel before I'm 30. Honestly I thought I'd never be able to do it but just slog away and slave at work- growing old and letting all my youthful dreams die as I leave behind the vestiges of youth. It might have not been to Japan for sakanaction (still a dream), but I'm infinitely grateful that I was able to watch another one of my favourite groups perform live… not to mention seeing Suga, my ultimate BTS crush and also Jimin in person.

Here’s some sneak shots I took:

Rapmon!!! He’s so charismatic.

[baby-bearie]

3 AM - d.s.

it was insane. everything felt insane.

everything feels insane in the ungodly hours of the morning.

but here you both were, at 2:49 am, standing in front of andrew's house.

andrew was never a good boyfriend. no, he wasn't ever violent. but the most common pains are never physical. he hurt you. he acted like you barely even existed, ditched you for his friends or for other girls he insisted he was just friends with, and was rather possessive about who you hung out with. that was what ultimately led to your break-up. andrew was always jealous. often unrealistically, but he was jealous of daniel, your best friend. in the past, andrew had succeeded in convincing you that your friends were against you, and got you to even push a few good people out of your life. but the line was drawn when it came to daniel. so when andrew started telling you that daniel was no good for you, you instead began to question if andrew was no good for you.

funny enough, it was him who broke up with you.because he assumed that you were messing around with daniel. heated words were exchanged, and he called it. you were upset from the fight, but subconsciously relieved because you had begun to realize that andrew was the real problem.

but that didn't mean you weren't heartbroken. it still hurt as much as any other break-up. so you went to your best friend, daniel.

at 8 pm, you were at his house. the second he saw your blotchy cheeks and red nose at his door his expression changed from confusion to concern.

"hey, hey, whoa. why are you crying?" he tugged you into his apartment and closed the door behind.

"a-andrew broke up with me." you reached up to wipe away your tears.

"oh, god. what a dick." daniel ran a hand through his hair.

daniel might have seemed averagely calm to the untrained eye, but you had known him for too long. the way his foot began tapping as if he needed to do something, the tiny bit of extra force with which he threw up his hands. he was angry.

"yeah, i know. it's okay, im okay."

"c'mon let's get your mind off it."

and daniel had really tried to force you to forget. the two of you baked, binged and bawled. well, you bawled and daniel sat there comforting you, hating andrew with a passion.

at about 11pm, you decided you might as well stay the night at daniel's since you were gonna be back tomorrow morning for more moral support.

however, at 12:30 am you were still awake, lying on daniel's bed. daniel had, as usual, insisted you have the bed and he went to sleep on the couch. but judging by the shuffling noises coming from the living room, he wasn't asleep either. you laid awake for a little longer until finally drifting off at 12:57.

at 2:09, your eyes snapped open. your feeling of restlessness from the night was replaced with a subtle anger. you felt the need to punch a wall and scream-cry. you wanted to even the playing field. you barely hesitated to question the feeling before tiptoeing down the hall to the couch, where daniel sprawled. he laid on his back, his long limbs were awkwardly sprawled out over the couch.

you lightly nudged his shoulder, causing him to shift his position, almost slapping you as he did.

"dani. daniel, wake up."

daniel's eyes fluttered open to you hovering above him, brows furrowed and hair spilling over your shoulders.

he groaned a bit. "(y/n), what time is it?"

his voice was groggy, and your heart beat a bit faster.

you ignored that.

you looked up to see the clock and looked back down at him, smiling sympathetically. "2 am."

"2 am?!" daniel groaned, turning back into the couch to sleep, rolling into his blanket.

"daniiii, come on!" you whined, trying and failing to roll him back over. when you got no response, you grabbed the blanket and yanked it out from under him. the boy inside tumbled out onto the carpet and you stood above him.

"c'mon. let's go."

"where?"

"anywhere."

at 2:20 am, daniel had not been expecting to be climbing into the driver seat of his car. this was one of many surprises that night.

the first was, of course, (y/n) showing up at his apartment with blotchy cheeks, crying about her pathetic excuse of a boyfriend.

the second was the hurt he felt for her, the need to take away her pain, to make the hurt stop.

the third surprise of the night was the anger he slowly built up. the anger that anyone could treat her the way andrew did. daniel was such a calm person, so why the sudden urge to smack down andrew?

all these emotions overwhelmed daniel, who was growing more and more awake as he drove (y/n) around aimlessly, hoping she'd tell him what was going on.

but the fourth surprise happened in the morning, at 2:34 am when daniel glanced over at (y/n) to see her leaning her head on the window, smiling gently. the moonlight barely illuminated her as it reflected off the window and daniel felt one of the biggest surprises of his life.

he was in love with his best friend.

taking a few deep breaths, daniel ripped his eyes off the girl next to him and set them back on the road ahead. clearing his throat he asked for the fourth time.

"where are we going?"

"turn left."

he turned.

"(y/n) seriously, wh"-

"turn left again."

"wait a second are we"-

"turn right."

(y/n) went to get out of the car, but daniel was quick to lock the doors.

"what are we doing here?" daniel turned to look at you and you turned away, failing to notice the slight change in the way he looked at you.

"andrew's going to have what he deserves."

"god, (y/n), have you thought this out at all?" daniel threw his head back, covering his face with his hands.

"of course i have, that's why there's eggs in the backseat."

"huh- what?" daniel whipped around in his seat, craning over to see two cases of eggs sitting in the back seat. he turned back to you, who was smiling as you reached over him to unlock the doors.

"let's go, you big baby."

daniel groaned but stepped out of the car, reaching into the back to get the egg cases.

you both stood on the lawn. he held the eggs above your head when you reached for them.

"before i give you these, are you entirely sure that you want to do this?"

you rolled your eyes at him.

"yes, mom. i hate how tall you are."

he smiled and handed you an egg case. the two of you turned to face the large face of the house.

and now here you were, standing in front of andrew's house at 2:49 am, with a boy who you knew would do anything for you.

"you get the front and i'll get the sides." he whispered.

and he was gone.

at 2:56 am, you both stood in front on your masterpiece, admiring it.

"he always was an egghead." you whispered.

daniel chuckled at that.

he turned to face you as you scanned the house for missed spots.

2:57 am

"dani, stop staring, it's creepy." you spoke without even looking at him.

he smiled at the ground, shaking his head.

you laughed and took his hand, pulling him towards the car.

2:58 am

you sat in the car, but daniel wasn't preparing to back out. you waited patiently, looking out the window at the streetlights.

2:59 am

"(y/n)."

"yeah?" you turned to look at daniel and the sight almost startled you.

his eyes sparkled with a new intensity you'd never seen. he was barely a couple inches away from you and you could feel his breath dust your face.

daniels eyes searched yours for any signs of you stopping, of you not wanting this, but you seemed to lean in a bit more.

3 am

daniel's lips met yours and you melted. it was one moment that seemed to stretch into millions. if love poems and love songs were a moment, this was that moment. you could feel him smiling into the kiss and you smiled back.

a light flicked on.

you and daniel jerked apart, wide eyes looking up at the house. the top window was open, and bright light flooded out.

"hey! you! hey!"

you and daniel looked at each other.

3:01 am

"DRIVE, YOU IDIOT, DRIVE!"

tags: @seaveyssparkle @splendidseavey @xowhyxodontxowexo @cloudsncoffee