#im always afraid of sounding hateful
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(honestly i ... just kinda dont understand why english always changes names so drastically, like please dont take this the wrong way i dont want to be annoying about this but most of the things i have heard the english words for just sound so much more ... childish? like alot of it is kinda made more cute sounding (Gigama/Minigama=frox, Miasma=gloom, Mayoi=bubbul frogs), even tho the names for main characters are kept the same, i never heard of anyone having problems with idk, yuno/yunobo being called that instead of .... william or something, it really just feels like a disservice to english speaking players like, get it, its a game for KIDS lol- at least in my opinion, but i dont wanna derail this again ;O;)
took me a long while to realize that miasma is called gloom in english, i thought people were calling the hands gloom-hands as a cutesy name fnjvgn,kdfvnsdnjskl
#ganondoodles talks#im always afraid of sounding hateful#when really im jsut kinda confused and baffled sometimes by the to me strange english names#not saying that german is inherently better#tho i do prefer it#i just always go ??? when i hear the english ones#weirdly enough Rito is the og name for them and its the same in english#but in german they have it as Orni which is a weird change#shout out ot the guy here and over on twitter who went all like LOL why you calling them Zonau its Zonai!! LOL#like sorry im using the terms im familiar with and also translate them from what i know since nigh all of my audience is english only
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My Personal Headcanon On Why Amy's Love For Sonic Died Down Lately (and their dynamic)
When they were younger, Amy's love for Sonic was pretty extreme, and Sonic was, understandable, uncomfortable for the most part. He knows she means well, but that girl needs to calm down.
She can fight, but sometimes her hammer could only stun her enemies for a while. (It took her a long time to get rid of that robot that has been chasing her around Station Square.) She wasn't fully independent yet, even if she fought on her own a couple of times.
She often follows Sonic and his friends around. She is part of the team, but she was not a strong as she is now at the time yet.
She admires Sonic. A LOT. And Sonic knows that. Obviously, he could only run away from something like that, since he is NOT ready for that kind of thing, and whether Amy takes the hint or stop, she still loves him.
...BUT, I think things were slightly starting to change between her and Sonic after Lost World.
Remember this line?
You remember that? Okay, okay. Here's another totally unrelated question:
Before the events of Lost World, when was the last time Amy said "I love you" to Sonic out loud?
...YEP. 😈 (Unless I'm missing something, let me know lmao)
As more games and adventures come out, the characters get slightly older, and Amy is 12 to 13 now, and she is most certainly at that age where her body starts to change, but especially on how she views Sonic.
She knows she loves Sonic, but it was this moment during her change where she actually wanted to admit that she loves him.
I believe that Amy was all about sharing her affection to him not through confessions, but through obvious hints. Sonic totally got it, and there was no need to confess. Sonic knows she loves her.
...But she never said it. And she almost did, but she never did again for a while.
I think this was the moment in her life where, oh, God, she actually loves Sonic. SHE LOVES HIM, WHAT.
And she was looking back at all the times she had with Sonic that she can now see were unpleasant to Sonic (At least that's what she thinks) and that's probably why she isn't so expressive about her love to him than how she used to back then.
She wasn't sure what to do with this realization, and sets aside it for a while, and nearly stayed as her casual, peppy self... until the Eggman War happened.
During the 6 months of being with the Resistance, fighting Eggman's army all day and all night, all she can think of was Sonic.
She dreams that he still with not just her, but with her friends. She just wanted to see Sonic again, she just wants to be with her hero again.
But I'd like to think that she was also thinking about how she used to treat Sonic back when they were younger, how Sonic would almost always run away from her whenever she asks him out, or always look so uncomfortable whenever she gets so close to him.
Cringing at those memories big time, she wanted to change and hopefully when Sonic is okay and comes back, she can be better for him.
...Or will he still find her uncomfortable regardless? Would he even be happy to see her at all if he did survive?
But, hold on! She can't just give up her love for Sonic! He made her who she is today! A peppy, nature-loving, hammer-swinging, confident, brave... loud-mouth... annoying... Sonic obsessed... weak... pathetic... lonely little girl.
If she gives up on Sonic, it'll be like she gave up on the one hedgehog who saved her life. If she didn't she'll still be the same ol' Amy.
I also like to think she had parents a long while before she met Sonic, and was even expecting a little sister, but a robot invasion happened from where she was and attacked her parents and instead of trying to save them, after getting hurt, she ran away, hoping that they'll come back okay. But they never did.
She was all alone, and needed someone, a friend, a new family, someone who will hold her hand, anyone, to be there for her. But she was ignored by lots, and at that point, she's better off by herself, but still longed for company.
Eventually though, her tarot cards told her her future hero, and there might be hope after all. She encountered Sonic, held onto the belief of the cards tight, and the rest is history.
So, with that headcanon in mind, not only did Amy loose her parents that she didn't save because of her cowardliness (she was only so little at the time that happened) and also Sonic, who she thought will be her only hope, but now gone.
She doesn't even care if he did come back, he'd probably hate her now after everything she did to him, always talking about their "future wedding" or forcing him to go to Twinkle Park.
For the last few months of the war, it was nothing but Amy mentally beating herself up for either refusing to change or moving on, and they are both not fine choices.
She loves Sonic, but he does not love her, and she finally, finally realized it. And it's probably for the best if no body loved her at all.
But of course Sonic did survive and all of her worries wash away in an instant, she's just not expressive about her love for Sonic AT ALL now, since she's still worried about it but rather not mention it to Sonic because it doesn't matter.
If Sonic doesn't love her, then her feelings don't matter to him, and according to Amy herself, that is okay.
But also, I'd like to think that Sonic was thinking about his friends a lot up in the Death Egg for the past months, sometimes it's Tails (worried for his safety), sometimes it's Shadow (because he's wondering why he would join Eggman.) At some point, for a few days, Amy was in his mind the longest, and he felt bad about how he thought he was rude and pushy to her.
He wondered if she's not thinking about it too much, and if she is, will she give up on him? Yeah, he doesn't feel the same and still not looking for a relationship, but it's so strange but interesting how anyone could ever like someone like Sonic the Hedgehog. Amy was never afraid to show that, and she probably might be now.
He couldn't help but feel guilty. They were kids when she was like this, but he was so... arrogant at the time too. Not a lot happened at the time yet. He'd always have trouble expressing how much he value his friends, until he shattered the Paradox Prism. (I'd like to think Prime took place before Forces. It makes sense.)
She is such a sweet girl, and he probably made her believe that he didn't care for her. Just because he doesn't feel the same, that doesn't mean he hates her at all.
He wished he never ran away from Amy... Worrying for his little bro and wishing to be a good person for Amy was when Sonic cried in the Death Egg for the first and only time.
Frontiers, in my opinion, is kind of confirming their dynamic now. Sonic is a lot more sincere and kinder to Amy and she is not all hyperactive and lovey to Sonic. There is probably a real reason for this now.
They are both hiding their feelings from them, and they are both unaware of this. Amy, hiding her mental issues from Sonic, and Sonic, hiding his guilt away from Amy.
None of those things are important now. Sonic is with Amy and Amy is with Sonic. They are here with each other. They can be finally be better for each other now.
They don't care if they'll ever be something more when they get older. None of that matters anymore. They are here with each other. They can be finally be better for each other now.
Maybe someday they'll both talk about it, but for now, the present is important. They care about each other too much to think about it right now.
It's the kind of love that is unbreakable. It doesn't even have to be romantic. It's just love. Love is important for everyone, in any form. It's something Sonic and his friends need. And especially Sonic and Amy.
Amy Rose is the living embodiment of love, and without her, a lot would go downhill for Sonic and co. Heck, if it weren't for her, Shadow wouldn't have never remembered Maria's promise, which lead him to save the world with Sonic, before he temporarily disappeared from their lives for a while.
She is always there to lend a helping hand for anybody, even bad guys like Metal Sonic, and despite what she had been through, both in Forces and headcanon wise, she still fights back, even without her hammer.
She will pick you back up on your feet, reminding you that you are important and that you are loved, and that you should never give up. It's pretty much the words of encouragement she herself needed also...
She is still the happy, hyper, butt-kicking hedgehog we all know and love, but she still need someone to pick her back up on her feet after so long. Thankfully, she has her friends and her blue hero. The hero who made her who she is today.
I think Amy has no idea how important she thought she is, but Sonic does. Sonic knows fully well how important she is to a lot of people. It's about time he returns the favor to her. It's his turn to remind her how much a lot of people love her.
How much he loves her.
And I feel like The Murder of Sonic the Hedgehog was the moment where their dynamic really shined, but also the starting point of their relationship not only healing, but also the next chapter of what's to come for them.
Everyone, friends old and new, gathered around for a special birthday. A birthday for the confident, unshakable, and radiant Amy Rose.
It was such a special moment in Amy's life. After years of chasing and following the people she look up to, she is part of the team, but most importantly, she is part of the family.
She is fully realized as someone more than just a fangirl, but someone strong, courageous, creative, kind and a big inspiration for others.
I feel like this moment here...
-is where Amy is eternally grateful to call her friends her family. A family she thought she'll never have again. She's not alone anymore, and as long as they're by her side, she'll never will be again.
Her chasing days are over. She's finally caught up to them. She's finally home.
And it's all thanks to Sonic.
If it weren't for him, she'd probably be alone forever. Her past moments with Sonic might be embarrassing to look back on for a while, but they are good memories regardless, because they involve him.
Sonic saved her life in more ways than one, and despite everything, he's grateful to have her too.
He cares about her. He really does... And in her eyes, that all she needed to know. As long as Sonic loves her in his own way, she'll be happy.
Amy hasn't given up on Sonic. As long as Amy always supports him, he'll be happy.
Maybe sometime in the future, they can talk about their problems, but that's a story for another time. At this point, they need to. Right now, they are happy. They are okay.
They are here for each other. They are finally better for each other now.
"You guys won't ever leave me, right?"
"Wouldn't dream of it."
#piko rambles#sonic the hedgehog#amy rose#Meant to be platonic but I don't care if you tag as ship lol#I've been meaning to post something like this for the longest time now but never really got into posting it-#-because you guys REALLY hate seeing these two together for some reason.#Well not for SOME reason. There are valid reasons why you don't ship them. Everyone has valid reason why they don't ship this or that.#But sometimes those reasons can just sound so petty to me. Like the reason why is because Amy is a stalker or Sonic hates her which is FALS#Also those age gap arguments are understandable but so goddamn annoying sometimes. Maybe when they hit their late teens or early twenties-#then they can be together if they want to. Besides a good percentage of Sonic ships are better off if they waited til they're old enough im#I love them regardless of whether they're just friends or an awkward older cringe fail couple lmao#But them being just friends and hiding away all their emotions towards each other just to keep them safe and happy with them- 😭😭😭#Son/adow is my favorite ship of all time and sonamy is my favorite childhood ship/platonic ship because they both have one thing in common.#ANGST 😀#I've been thinking about Sonic and Amy's dynamic as of late and MAN-#Mixed with some personal headcanons of mine and their dynamic as of late just makes me so emotional.#Sonic and Amy have gotten so close now and it's so sweet but so heartbreaking at the same time when you think about it.#I'm so happy they are getting along better and being there for each other but there is so much to dissect here. So much to think about.#I might be a little silly but Amy losing her parents and being alone for so long and being the reason why she's always hanging onto Sonic-#-explains SOOOOOOOOO much about her. At least that's my headcanon for WHY that is.#Amy with abandonment issues speaks to me on a personal level. I'm always afraid of being forgotten or left behind by my family.#I sometimes feel like I'm not good enough no matter how hard I try. I do not blame Amy. I relate to her a lot. It's one of the many reasons#-why Amy is my favorite character besides Sonic and Shadow.#She fights hard to prove she's a valuable member of the team and hates getting left behind but despite all that she wasn't afraid to-#-express herself and her love for people. But after the Eggman War there was some changes that made her less expressive about her love.#Yeah she still loves Sonic but she doesn't admit it because none of that matters anymore and she thought that not being loved by Sonic#-is better than being loved since she nearly wasted her life loving someone who she thought has constantly bothered. 🥲#But I think after TMoStH I think she'll be less afraid of being expressive about it. She and Sonic are just so caring for each other 😭#I love these two way too much that when I think about them for too long I'll start SOBBING 😭😭 I'M EVEN SOBBING RIGHT NOW LMAO
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caw 🦅
#neopets#neotag#neoart#eyrie#mutant#vin doods#I can't beat the allegations that i doodle dnd creatures on a daily with this one huh#god i love mutants eyries so much i'm sorry i gavehim more draconic features but uGH;#what great colours lmao#I also gave inverted knees to the hooves cause i aint doing whatever neos doing#can you tell i have a thing for dnd and dragons in general im so sorry JAKLSDF#also in topic i've been so wanting to make a neo player's manual for so stupidly long its insane#might actually do it at one point#i had species and proficiencies and everything at one point i think its all gone lol#also for a fact that i'd be a me-thing for the most part#like i'd be the only one wanting it or playing according to it#my other friends none like neopets so yeah#god do i want to dm a neopian adventure i have tons planned lmao#but oh well#i'm super greatful for all positive commenta ad every like and reblog you guys ave given meeeee#i sound like a broken record but i swear i try to not leave this blog for long but i always read your tags and crack up to them sajhas#i know i've left a couple of you on read that actually wanted to know about my characters BUT IM SO SORRYYYY#my master's taking so long and everytime there's something new and have to rewrite and replan everthing everyday i hate it here#but i will do it#i know i will#both the lore writting and my thesis HASJKHASJS#anyways if you're still reading dont be afraid to shoot up a couple of messages! It might make this blog less dead
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fuck
#like idk i never realized just how bad she hurt me. i didnt even rly realize she hurt me at all#bc there are so so so many ways she sldve reacted so much worse. but like i never thought someone cld just straight up ignore it.#like i get the way i told her was dumb and confusing. ok. i can understand that. whatever#but idk. she said she wished my sister had told her years earlier so that she cldve helped her back then#but then suddenly it's different when it's me. suddenly it's 'but youve always been my little girl' and 'oh i dont know that sounds dangerou#s' and 'are you sure?' and 'how long have you felt like this'#well it's been almost 5 fucking years now and it hasnt changed. i havent changed. fuck#i trusted her. i trusted her to be there for me and to support me and to accept me and she threw it back in my face and never even blinked#i can never ever trust her again and she doesnt care. she doesnt even know bc shes so wrapped up in all the fucking lies she tells herself#fuck. she did everything wrong. fuck. i can never fully trust anyone with this part of me again bc of her#and it's awful bc it's such an important part of me. it brings me so much joy and i think on it often and i love myself for it#but it's just simmering in my chest and every time i think of letting it hit air again i freeze bc i thought it was safe once and it WASNT.#i wanted to get my name changed before high school. i wanted to start the medical process. i wanted all the thing i thought shed do for me.#my wants and my understanding of my identity has changed now but it still hurts.#it hurts so bad to see other ppl my age get all of that and to have the support of their family and to not be afraid to put a name to it all#im happy for them. but it's so awful hearing her point those ppl out w no self awareness like oh thats so good for them isnt that sweet#I AM RIGHT HERE! YOU COULD BE DOING ALL OF THAT! I NEEDED YOU TO BE THAT FOR ME!#and every time she does acknowledge it she gets it completely wrong or it's just to bemoan how little she understands#'oh everyones changing their name now its so confusing' 'im really trying i dont know what else you want from me' NO YOURE NOT! YOURE NOT!#YOUVE NEVER BEEN WILLING TO TRY. NOT FOR ME.#you never fucking loved me you loved the idea of what you thought i would be and you cant fucking let it go even when the truth is staring#you dead in the face. fuck. you complain about how i 'hate you' or 'think youre stupid' well maybw treat me with an ounce of respect and act#like you understand the things youve EXPLICITLY BEEN TOLD. even a little.#but honestly it's too late. if she were to suddenly have a change of heart now i wouldnt give a damn.#the damage is done you dont get to have this part of me and act like youre such a good and supportive mother.#i cant even say i hate her. i love her but shes hurt me more than anyone else ever has and i can never trust her to actually love me or even#fucking see me or support anything about me that actually matters to me#i dont know. i dont know. thinking about it again.#ive thought abt telling my dad. not bc it wld do any good but bc ik he values honesty and maybe hed throw me a 'damn that sucks'#my sister said this is something i have to fight on but she doesnt get it. i have no ground to stand on as far as shes concerned
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im home earlier than i thought
#i can actually work on things yay. at least one of them#for the mav and samael story i will rewrite the first chapter#bc i think starting with mav having One of Those breakdowns bc of what happened with zachary its not the best way#i think its better to start the story showing his Unconventional Desires and Fantasies about being murdered as violently as possible#and then explain whats the reason behind them later; when the readers have an idea of who he is. and maybe wonder why hes like that#or if hes weird just because something is wrong with his brain (i mean something is def wrong with him either way.#but did something happened for him to end this way or it just happened without something being a direct cause?)#at least i didnt even got to the midpoint; i only had ~800 words. which is kind of a win for me tbh i havent write shit in months#let alone this thing is out of my comfort zone for a lot of reasons; starting with the fact its not a fanfic and everything belongs to me#and i havent touched a subject this sensitive like a p4r4philia before. of course i did my research but tbf there isnt a lot on this one#so im trying not to sound completely uninformed; just that i couldnt really find a whole lot of research on this#bc it doesnt exist on the first place. the closest is lopatka's clase; which i've read what i could find about already; its not a whole lot#anyway i am afraid of getting hate comments. something something i am romanticizing a serious subject#something something i am portraying this as a love story (im not; if the characters think so its another thing) so i must be fucked up irl#something something 'this is fucked up and doesnt cater to my direct tastes; therefore is bad and you are bad too'#of course i will put warnings but you know how people are. and if they report the story wattpad could actually take it down#a bummer but. whatever. i always have ao3 but i will have to do an extra step and translate it to english#alongside having 0 audience there. well shit just happens ig lol#this turned into a rant sorry#iván whispers
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[ID: A priest in a confession booth looking shocked]
#id added#both are equally shit probably. only saw my dad once a year ish tho and i see ppl talking abt shit moms less often so :#tw shitty parenting. def neglectful. probably counts as abusive idfk. also self harm.#my mother was extremely emotionally neglectful. she started refusing to hug me when i was like.. 12 ? bc she decided i was a problem child#and bc she was always 'mad' at me but she never specified why. she wouldnt budge on it even when i borderline begged#she is constantly saying ableist sanist shit to me. like calling me a psychopath. insane. autistic (as an insult) n telling me i deserve#to be locked up in prison or the 'crazy hospital'#literally came to laugh in my face when she heard some info abt depression on the radio bc it sounded like me#when i ended up in the er bc of sh she yelled at me for months. told me i traumatized her. wasted her money.#she looked though some personal journal notes abt the experience then tried to blackmail me. threatened to keep me from going to uni#she still doesnt believe im mentally ill. not after ALL THAT.#she doesnt hit me but she throws things at me sometimes. she once threatened to give me a concussion so she could be arrested and taken awa#bc she said that would be a break from me#she said all the years she spent raising me were a waste of her life#she once accused me of trying to break her arm bc i was afraid and pushed the door shut hard ig#she talks shit about me to my relatives on the phone. loudly. she makes sure i can hear on purpose. sometimes shell live commentate to them#when im just walking past her to go the bathroom or smthg. shell make shit up like saying im glaring at her#she has criticized every single inch of my existence. the way i talk. tone. word choice. facial expressions. body language. body.#it got to the point where if she entered the room i would go stock still and stock silent. hurry to cover every offending part of my body.#she hated that too#she made fun of me for crying in our arguments when i was younger so i lost that ability for years. she always called me oversensitive#then a few years later shed call Herself sensitive and tear up after some of the worse fights and then cry to her mom about it for sympathy#she has looked through my trash and gotten mad abt the things she found there. like a single one dollar snack wrapper bc thats wasting mone#we were not by Any means poor. we even owned the house we lived in. but she was stingy to the point of absurdity.#we lived in a house w broken appliances for YEARS bc she refused to find a repairman or to replace the objects (AGAIN WE COULD AFFORD THIS)#aircon. lightbulbs. sinks. water filter. the FUCKING WASHING MACHINE. THE GODDAM TOILETS. etc etc etc#there was no laundromat nearby and i wasnt given any money so i wouldnt have been able to use one anyway. it was allll handwashing.#tbf she did it all. but then she would endlessly complain. when i told her to replace the washing machine she told me to shut up#she also told me i should be grateful i didnt have to pee in a hole in the ground like in Some Countries when i told her to fix the toilet#bc of mental illness (and bc the bathroom door DIDNT FKIN LOCK OR EVEN CLOSE PROPERLY and i was v uncomfortable) i had a really hard time
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Thinking about post-story Jiaoqiu trying to find himself in the new situation.. and getting even more clingier 🤧
warning: spoilers for jaoqiu's story if you havent played the new quest. possible ooc jiaoqiu?
Word count: 1k+
a/n: its been a while from writing and even tho im not disabled in any way, i hope its alright bc im kinda nervous to post this. i just think hed be a lovely pain in the butt to get more love </3
The new reality has been a true challenge for Jiaoqiu - trying to navigate through the house was already a tedious task, let alone cooking, but he wasn't going to give up so easily. While yes, he did miss doing things by himself - which, once in a while brought dark clouds over his head - the foxian managed to find enjoyment through doing tasks together, with your help.
It's quite known that Jiaoqiu isn't afraid of craving affection from you anywhere and anytime - especially now, considering he's limited in what he's able to do safely without hurting himself. Now that you're welcome in the kitchen to assist him, the pink-haired foxian can't help, but pull you flush against him while you carefully guide his hands to cut vegetables in even slices.
The healer slowly trails the tip of his nose down your hair until he recognizes the familiar shape of your neck - Jiaoqiu nuzzles happily into you, ever so slightly tickling you and giving you goosebumps; he smiles against your skin when you let out a comically fake, tired sigh, only fueling him to continue pestering you further.
He purposely takes his chin off the top of your head and searches for your ears so he's able to whisper, but when you decide to playfully confront him, Jiaoqiu only plays dumb and tilts his head to the side, asking you a seemingly innocent question, "Hmm? What do you mean, love? I'm not doing anything, the kitchen is not a playground, remember?"
There's a chance you'd probably believe him if you two were mere coworkers - but his twitching ears always give away his attempts to lie to you.
Jiaoqiu is clingy. Absolutely no news to anybody. That's when you finally get done with cooking, it's time for the cunning foxian to get a break; he stretches his arms to you, waiting until you put his hands on your cheeks. He cups them gently, rubbing the soft flesh with his thumb, and softly moves it to find your lips - his mind paints a picture of your figure, the shape and every crease his fingers feel; he smiles at you yet again, with a glimmer of mischief.
He wants to kiss you.
He also knows he will most likely miss your lips more or less.
But instead of feeling hopeless, he uses it to his advantage.
Jiaoqiu begins to pepper your face in kisses until he feels you try to get away from him and hears your angelic giggles; he kisses your left eyebrow - oh no, that's definitely not the place he's aiming for! He moves more to the right and kisses the bridge of your nose - oh no, not yet! The softness of his lips meets the apple of your cheek - oh, that's closer, but still not the goal he has in his mind...
After a while of Jiaoqiu purposely changing directions (and probably missing some anyway, but it's not like he complains about it, since he can kiss you more this way), with a little help of yours, he places a kiss on the corner of your lips, barely giving you time to breathe and finally, finally reaching his awaited destination, pressing his lips on yours; he gives you a few quick kisses if he feels like he still misses the exact place to change the angle, melting into a puddle with butterflies in his stomach.
Is it hard sometimes? Yes. The heavy weight travels straight to his heart, leaving him clenching his fists; the foxian hates the helplessness that hurts twice as much, much worse than the wounds Hoolay has inflicted.
Nowadays, his ears pick up your step way better, even letting him guess correctly what jar of herbs you're opening from the mere sound. He uses his tail as some sort of object detector - but he only waves his fan innocently when it makes you yelp in surprise, as Jiaoqiu runs the tip down your spine all the way down.
"Ah, I wonder what that was?" Jiaoqiu wonders, the fluffy ears twitching and the pink tail swishing behind him, "Is something wrong, beloved? Did you mess up the measurements? No worries, we'll fix it right away."
Well, if you decide to leave the house for supplies, you now have to hold his hand all the time. Just to be sure, he also wraps his tail around you, so he knows you're by his side and he doesn't bump into anybody. Hey, he's just thinking about the civilians around him! As a doctor, there's nothing else that matters more than keeping them safe and healthy... Right?
Even though he's been braiding his hair for years and could probably do it by himself again - being only a tiny bit off on one side, he cuddles up to you in the morning and presses kisses onto your neck, silently asking you to help him once you get out of bed - you certainly can't miss his hair getting all up in your face... and therefore, what he's asking for.
Does he feel a liiiitle desperate? Mmm, a bit.
Does he feel like he's feeding the helplessness in the back of his mind? Sometimes.
But it's worth to look for happy moments regardless of the situation - and you being perfectly aware he's doing it solely to get even more of your attention - makes him feel a little better with it.
Though, he knows when to stop and give you space; he doesn't want to actually become your burden, even if he lost his sight, he's still trying his best to stay as independent as possible in terms of daily tasks as possible.
If you're tired, Jiaoqiu waits until you hand him the brush and he's the one combing your hair; if you're too sleepy in the morning, he's the one helping you put on your clothes with verbal help, even if it takes a bit more time than usual. Along with you, he organizes medicines so neatly, it takes a blink of an eye for him to bring a full tray of medicines when you happen to catch a cold.
Does he miss being able to see? More than he'd admit.
But the more he thinks, the pink-haired foxian always comes to the same conclusion - it'll probably be harder to unlearn the clinginess once his eyesight comes back...
But for now, maybe it's alright to indulge a little more?
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I saw that you think Miguel is a thigh man 😩 can I request him x reader who's thighs clap when they run or so some type of activities. I got that problem sadly 😵💫😮💨
yes, of course!! i love talking ab our thigh fucker ;^)
cw: body insecurities, thigh chafing (yeouch), fluffy reassurances, small bit of smut (OK IM SORRY 😳 i didn't see that coming [yes i did.]), just oral and uh, a bit of marking, not proof read!!
---
you've never enjoyed prolonged physical activity: running, swimming, biking, etc, because you hated the way your thighs would slide against each other; uncomfortably chafing your skin and making noticeable sounds.
so when miguel proposed a hike for your weekly date, you were hesitant to agree. unfortunately, he's very good at persuading you...
that's how you found yourself on a narrow trial shrouded with trees, taking slow, cautious steps as you attempt to keep your thighs from touching as much as usual.
of course, it only helped so much. your inner thighs were still chafing and getting sore, but you try to conceal your pain as much as possible, too embarrassed to mention anything to miguel.
though your boyfriend is the most loving and accepting man you've ever met, you still haven't told him of your insecurity. you're afraid that once you mention something to him, he'll notice your thighs even more.
miguel is pacing himself, making sure to slow down with you so he doesn't leave you behind (he does this hike all the time). he adjusts his baseball cap, making sure his wild curls are smooshed down as he watches you walk toward him.
you look beautiful today. you always look beautiful. but there's something about see you in this condition that make him twitch in his shorts.
he loves the way your chest heaves as you take deep breaths, your tits pressing desperately against the thin fabric. how droplets of sweat roll over the contours of your cleavage, outlining what he wants to see the most. and how your leggings look like they were painted on, completely revealing the overwhelming softness of your thighs and how they press so sweetly together.
he can barely take his eyes off of you.
but he can't help but notice how odd you're acting too.
he's perplexed as to why you're taking such big steps and moving like you'd rather be anywhere but there, with him. why your face is tense, yet completely blank at the same time.
there's clearly something wrong, but you've been silent this whole hike.
"baby, you doing alright?" you seem to be lost in your thoughts as you stare down at your dirt-scuffed sneakers, you don't even notice he's stopped in front of you. he calls out to you again, "babe?"
"hm?" you look up, pausing your unnatural movements to give your legs a rest, "oh, yeah...i'm fine" you attempt a smile, but even you can tell it looks fake and performative. his eyes bloom with concern as he notices how your legs are shaking under you.
"what's going on, sweetheart? are you hurt?"
"no...it's just," you look away, still apprehensive to mention anything.
he pushes, hand reaching for yours, "just what?"
"i-my thighs are chafing..." you say softly, looking back at him. he's frowning. "b-but i can keep going!" you start walking again, willing yourself to continue even though it hurts.
"baby, wait," he stops you, "don't hurt yourself. i didn't realize you were having trouble this whole time."
you shrug, "it's ok, i'm used to it."
"sweetheart, come here." he has his back turned towards you, coaxing you over to him. "get on."
"get on?"
"i'll carry you back to the car."
"no! you don't have to--"
"i want to." he interrupts, "then when we get home, we'll take a nice bath and get you all patched up."
"what about the rest of the trail?"
"we can just get our work out in at home..."
---
you sigh as warm water washes over the inflamed skin of your inner thighs. it stings sharply, but the pain feels oddly satisfying, especially as miguel thoroughly lathers shampoo in your hair.
"feel better?"
you hum, eyes closing as his fingers attentively massage your scalp.
"why didn't you tell me that you were hurting earlier?"
"i dunno, it just wasn't that big of a deal, mig."
"it was. you were barely able to sit without your hands between your thighs."
you snort, "i thought you liked it when i do that."
you yelp when you feel him tug sharply at your hair. "you know what i meant." he growled, clearly unhappy you're trying to avoid the subject.
"it's embarrassing."
"what's embarrassing?" his hands start to cup water onto your head, washing the suds from your hair until you're squeaky clean.
"my thighs." his movements stop suddenly.
"what about them?"
"they're...too big."
"too big?" he genuinely sounds baffled, almost scoffing in disbelief.
"yeah, they're always touching and they make this...clapping sound when i do certain physical movements..."
"so?"
"so?" you turn your head to look at him, questioning eyes meeting his scarlet stare. his red irises are mere slivers with how blown out his pupils are, heavy with lust.
"yeah, so what?"
"so...i don't like them." you voice is small as you look at him shyly, cheeks blooming with heat under the stringiness of your wet hair.
"well i love them."
---
miguel presses gentle and sweet kisses over your tender skin, relieving all the pain from your chafed inner thighs with just a touch of his lips. your legs are hooked over his shoulders as he makes his way up your body.
the prominent shape of his fangs press against his top lip as his sharp maroon stare fixes right at the apex of your thighs. you can tell he's holding himself back by the way his fingers grip bruises into the tops of your legs.
"baby, you have no idea," he takes a deep breath, eyes closed as his nose nuzzles at your inner thigh, "how fucking perfect you are."
"mig, please!"
he smiles cloyingly, letting you watch his fangs retract before he dips his head closer to your center. he wouldn't want to hurt you...
he locks eyes with you when he experimentally slips his tongue through your soaking lips, only giving you enough attention to keep you buzzing. he's delicately laving against you, feeling you tense and pant under him as he slowly builds up your pleasure.
a haze of lust instantly clouds over his darkened eyes and you watch as he gets lost in the taste of you. he pushes in deeper, tongue fucking you, slurping and sucking, while spilling muffled groans over your pulsing cunt as your thighs begin to tighten around him.
he flicks over your aching clit, drinking in your whimpers, moans, and cries as he teases you, pulling back every so often until you bury your hand into his curls and force him down onto you.
you're nearly suffocating him with your thighs when he start suckling you into his mouth, muscles trembling against him as you grow closer to the edge, and he loves it.
his silky lips and slick tongue push you straight off the edge. you hold on to him as your body writhes with white hot pleasure, hand in his hair and thighs around his head. you can barely hear the muffled groans he makes from how lost in ecstasy you are.
but he groans, and grunts, and then freezes.
"did i just..." he unwraps your legs from around him and sits up, tugging his briefs down in disbelief. your bleary eyes open, eyes glazed and unfocused from the intensity of your orgasm. "shit."
you look down and are graced with a beautiful mess that drips from his cock and the black fabric of his boxers.
you can't help the amused smile that spreads over your lips, "you need some help cleaning that up?"
#anon#miguel o'hara#miguel o’hara#miguel o'hara x reader#miguel o’hara x reader#miguel o'hara smut#fluff#miguel o’hara smut
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please make headcannons about okarun as a boyfriend :3
GUYS OMG IM SO SORRYYYY
I’ve been so busy lately and I did get a lot of requests!! So I will be doing them asap, heheh!
(I got a lot for Takakura and Jiji so yeah those will be dropped soon!)
//———//
Tags: Lots of fluff, no use of Y/N or name, reader is just called “you”, suggested fem reader? (I can make another for male reader if asked!), mostly just focused on you two.
Okarun boyfriend headcanons
- He absolutely made the first move, but not on purpose at all.
- You were both fighting together and he ended up getting the wind knocked THE FUCK out of him, literally almost cried and said fuck this shit.
- Only jokes though, he would not actually leave.
- He would get up and continue trying to fight and attempt to protect you. All those times you were fighting together would resonate with him at this moment and he’d start going on a rant about how you make him feel.
- Him having a crush on you would be so obvious that it’s so hard to believe that he actually even like you and is trying to keep it secret.
- Will stare at you.
- Will continuously rant to you about sci-fy topics.
- Will insist on acting tough and like a gentleman to impress you. (He ends up looking really dumb but in a cute way)
- He would draw you a lot and one time you stumbled across a drawing and it was you as an alien and you genuinely didn’t know how to feel about it and he felt bad and felt scared to talk to you for the next few hours.
- He isn’t exactly the needy type, but after you get together he will need reassurance especially if you have close male friends.
- Absolutely hates being jealous in all senses but will absolutely fight for you if he feels the need.
- If you’re into stars and astrology type shit, he would make one of those solar system type projects for you but it would be so expertly made.
- As your boyfriend he would always want to get you little trinkets, like inexpensive things that remind him of you.
- If anyone talks shit about you, he will not tolerate it at all. You wouldn’t even have to tell him cause somehow he already knows. He’ll come out the shadow like he’s Batman ready to beat that ass up for justice.
- He would be more hesitant to let you get into dangerous type situations but he’s not controlling at all by any means, so he won’t stop you but will do what he can to help and protect you along the way.
-He would most likely not initiate a kiss first until like a bit into the relationship because he’d be worried about the timing but he’d gradually get more comfortable kissing and hugging you without asking if it’s alright like 1000000 times.
- if you go to school together, you would ask him for the homework answers and he’d be a smart ass and ask why you didn’t do it yourself. (He’d give them to you.
- Will get ALL UP in your ass (not literally. Not sus) if you aren’t taking care of yourself. He will scold you but his words most his words weigh heavy on your heart due to how concerned his voice will sound the whole time.
- One time he would stop wearing his glasses and when you ask about he would explain that he heard from one of your friends that you didn’t like boys with glasses. (SABOTAGING HOE👿.. GRRR)
- Probably wouldn’t really like PDA all that much but he would never be afraid of telling the whole world that you’re his lover and that he’s your boyfriend.
- If he found out anything other girls had a thing for him, he would immediately turn them down.
- He would NOT like his lover being jealous at all. Causing any pain to his partner physically or mentally would absolutely hurt.
- He would panic if you’re sick and try his best to take care of you.
- If you threw up in front of him, he would definitely throw up too.
- He will start to copy things you do and say after a while if you doing them without realizing and you ask him where he got it and he’d just say it’s something he picked up somewhere. (He doesn’t want you to think he’s making fun of you.)
- If yall were a meme, you’d be "I don't like them at all," Takakura says, then he suddenly tripped and fell to the ground, as multiple pictures of you fell out of his pockets. "Wait!" He cried out. "These aren't mine!"
- Would have a photo album of you both every time you went on any kind of adventure, all the pictures would be shitty and kind of blurred, but it’s definitely the thought that counts!!
ERM AND I THINKS THATS ALL FOR NOW. I MIGHT WRITE ANOTHER HEADCANON THINGY FOR HIM ANOTHER TIME IF YOU GUYS WANT!!
Tags: @taesy-miranda-lee @stefnarda
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( -_•)╦̵̵̿╤─ ㅤ ─ ㅤ the people all scream. ( d.w ) ²
cw. pre-established relationship. normal!au (kind of). unhinged!dean. sweet!reader. obsessive tendencies. ig you could say ... gaslighting as a tag but its not that deep.
"WHAT'S THIS?"
YOUR voice sounds so sweet in his ears. it always does. it has a lilt at the end, like everything you ask is tacked with a gentle little question mark. you'd been cleaning the house. he'd been doing dishes in the kitchen.
sundays were like that, with dean and you. it was a cleaning day. he didn't feel unsafe or worried for you at all, his head was at rest, because you were always within sight.
dean glances over his shoulder, and he expects to see the ring that he'd gotten for you in your hands. a bright smile on your face, knowing what it meant. instead, he sees his knife.
clean and sharp as ever. not a trace of blood on its handle, or staining the steel.
it takes all of his strength to not react; to keep an air of nonchalance. his fingers still, though, with the sponge in one hand, and the ceramic plate in the other.
"a knife," he says slowly, and he hates talking to you like this. it kills him, to treat you like anything besides the perfect partner he knows you are. he sets the plate on the drying rack and turns off the sink faucet as he turns to face you. "was in my nightstand, yeah?"
you nod. your face is lit up in curiosity, not fear, never fear. he could reveal every dirty secret he keeps buried in his mind and you wouldn't be afraid, he thinks.
"s'just for if someone breaks in," dean waves his hand dismissively, "just in case. there's a lot of fucked up people out there, isn't there?"
no. he is not one of them. the monsters he takes care of for you, in your defense, try to tell him this every time, as their blood splatters onto his clothes and his eyes go bleary and sting from it getting in them, but he's not. he does this for you. he is protecting you.
the relief on your face at his words is evidence enough, isn't it? that you need him? that without him, you'd end up gutted by a werewolf, drained by a vampire, or some other fucked up thing that he's kept you from figuring out about?
you turn on your heel, and his heartrate finally decreases to a normal speed in his chest, even as his lungs ache. dean does not want you to learn about the sacrifices he's made to keep you safe. that is not on you. it's his choice. he'll make it every day.
"make sure to put it back, yeah?"
you don't ever notice when his voice cracks, or he stumbles over his excuses like they're physical road blocks. you didn't notice, once, when his white button-up had a blood speckled collar. tossed it into the wash with all of his other clothes. he'd thrown that shirt out, though ─ didn't want it to be a bad omen.
was it, still? you'd found his knife. his lucky blade, inherited from his father, a weapon unused until it reached dean's hands. on the handle, a 'w' engraved. his destiny carved out for him.
no. he makes the decision, ultimately, to trust his judgements. it'd gotten him this far, hadn't it?
he will continue to ignore that his judgements had led to numerous deaths by his hands. that there would always be more to come, because the world was so, so determined to get its filthy, violent hands on his angel's innocent, untouched skin.
dean picks up the plate again, scrubs it until the sponge's top layer is starting to crumble in his fingers. scrubs it more, then, because his baby deserved perfect, and nothing in this house was clean so long as he touched it.
so he'd clean it. again and again. wash away the blood on his hands over and over, so they'd be good enough to deserve touching you. his pretty, naive baby.
. . . tags.
@whyyouegg @sthefferrete @cevansbaby-dove @titsout4nicholas @cosmicanakin
@bluestrd @ultravi0lence14 @mccartneyqp @poughkeepsie99 @depressionbarbie2023
@im-bili @ariasong11 @chevroletdean @angelblqde @ostaramoon
@deansbite @lyarr24 @psyches-reid @reynas13 @momoewn
@deanswidow @jasvtsc @figthoughts @beausling @frosttbitessam
@aileenunfiltered
#──★ dahlia's jrnl#dean winchester#dean winchester imagine#dean winchester one shot#dean winchester drabble#dean winchester x reader#dean winchester x you#supernatural#spn#supernatural drabble#spn drabble
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˗ˏˋ꒰♰꒱ gojo dating a latina | (gojo satoru x latina! reader)
I got inspo for gojo recently, he’s so hard yet easy to write for but when it comes to x readers YALL MOTIVATE ME also please comment if y’all wanna be on the tag list @sanjisblackasswife @mommypieck @backwzzds @chrollohearttags @painism
- finds it hot when you dance shaking your hips
- immediate wolf whistle and tries to use his charm
-loves that you played hard to get
- when you speak Spanish oh my god his love for you grows 10x bigger
-he even loves how you say his name, makes him melt
- he’s in love with your dialect fr
-then your distinctive latina indigenous features
-loves to kiss your nose bridge specifically
-If you wear lip liner, he’s gonna call your kisses spicy kisses
-“I want besos and I wan’em now!!l
-calls you spicy, and exotic (man’s got jumped) 😭😭
- LOVES ALL SIZED LATINAS POINT BLANK PERIOD
-loves it when you wear honey on your lips
-“oh hello there mamacita!!” The way he says it sounds so white you find it funny 😭😭
-will call you mamas, mami, or princess
-picks up on Spanish lingo claiming he’s learning on duolingo but he’s serious yet never finishes things 💀
- LOVES IT WHEN YOU COOK!! He’s never had that much flavor even Japanese food has tons of flavor
-dances to everything
- actually is afraid of your aim when you throw shit at him (specifically the chancla)
- he hates it when you grab it and spank his ass sometimes playfully
-y’all make fun of each others accents.
-when he yells your name he adds a Spanglish accent.
- he fw bad bunny and romeo santos
- gets hard when you get angry in Spanish,
-“dude why are you not scared?” “I love it when she’s angry.” he’ll be all smitten for you
- feeds you (we Latinas are ALWAYS HUNGRY)
- “so uh quieres joder?” That’s how bad it is
- loves that you’re possessive and clingy because he won’t have to worry as much about you being loyal
-“WHY IS YOUR LOCATION OFF?!”
-“Im on a mission—“
-“I’m going over there.” You’ll hang up and drag him by the ear, take the train home lecture him on not scaring you on missions. Because well like curses and some curse users
-“you look bonita!!”
- he loves how wild you are!!
- hands on hips when doing perreo IS A MUST
-man’s got some seasoning in him you just brought out the rest of the inner spice he needed.
-when you tell him your insecurities about being a phase or used as a token girl he’ll be serious and reassure you that he only has and does have eyes for you only
-nah bc you got him that much weak in the knees
- loves the fact you are always calling him papas, amorcito, satorito (HIS FAVORITE)
-pretends to be sounding dumb not knowing some basic Spanish words just to hear them in English or Japanese (whichever language y’all speak to each other)
-“te amo.”
-“what does that mean?”
“I love you.”
“I love you too!!” He’ll kiss you and also finds you addicting
-when you both kiss he gets addicted “ugh you taste amazing!!”
- will never get his hands off of you
-loves you for you. Forever and always
#⋆˚✿˖° osita’s chisme time#gojou satoru x reader#jjk x y/n#jjk x latina! reader#jjk x poc!reader#gojo headcanons#gojo x latina! readerr#gojo satoru x latina! reader#⍣ ೋ osita’s loves#༊*·˚ ositas master list#jjk masterlist#jjk drabbles#jjk x you#jjk headcanons#jjk imagines#jjk fanfic#jjk x reader#jjk fluff#jjk scenarios#jjk x plus size reader#jujustsu kaisen x reader#jujutsu kaisen x latina!reader#gojo satoru#gojo satoru fluff#satoru gojō x reader#satoru gojo#gojo x reader
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I'm gonna request something for haley bc i love how you write her and not so obsessed. im not sure if you are writing for request? but im gonna give my shot
a prompt where haley as wife, and the farmer was late passed midnight because of mining shit. and almost died (lmao). she got home safely, but limping with her wounds and bruise. then there's haley, saw her wife barely walking and her reaction, just comfort, fluff, worried and taking care of the farmer.
that's all, thanks, no pressure <3
Kiss it Off Me
CHAPTER 7
Chapter Summary:
"I don't like your stupid gift!" She didn't intend for it to sound harsh, but as soon as her mouth opened, she couldn't stop the words from spilling out. "I honestly thought you'd know better than to give me something like this."
Pairings: Haley x Fem!farmer
Disclaimer: I do not own Stardew Valley or any of the related characters. Stardew Valley is created by and owned by ConcernedApe. This fanfiction is intended for entertainment only. I am not making any profit from this story. All rights of the original Stardew Valley story belong to ConcernedApe.
Warning: violence, blood
Notes:
thanks to anon for being the first-ever reader to request a prompt. I initially thought to make a separate fic for this one but I realized why not make it as a new chapter? There would be some adjustments to the prompt, instead of Haley being the farmer's wife, she'd be somewhere in between a friend and a woman struggling to put a name to what she's feeling with the farmer. I'm really sorry anon for not following the route you're hoping for but I do hope you'll like this one.
Summer 9
The sound of thunder clapping from above her made it difficult for sleep to come that night. Despite the late hour, the darkness outside was illuminated intermittently by flashes of lightning, casting eerie shadows across the walls of her room.
Rain drummed steadily against the glass, a constant reminder of Yoba's fury. The room felt oppressive, suffocating almost, as if the storm had seeped its way indoors, invading her sanctuary.
She had always hated rain. Well, the main reason is it's horrible weather for a dashing photographer like her. Not only does it ruin her hair that she spent all morning fixing, but it could also ruin her equipment. Oh, did she also mention it gives an awful lighting?
She also shares the same level of dislike for storms because they destroy the calmness of rain. It's aggressive, cold, and destructive.
That's why the moment the news announced there would be a storm for the next three days, she was quick to stock every little favorite snack she could think of because there was no way she was waltzing outside in that kind of weather.
Haley popped out a tired eye as she looked at the clock beside her.
1:56 AM.
Oh, joy it's almost two in the morning. How in Yoba's name could she go outside with bags under her eyes probably heavier than all of Emily's hippie gems combined?
'I mean– there's always a concealer,' she thought but quickly dismissed the idea.
She has been minimizing her makeup since... since whatever (when you told her she looked prettier even without them) PLUS with summer's sweltering heat, layering on cosmetics seemed suffocating.
With a groan, she pushed herself up from the bed, determination flashing in her tired eyes as she made her way to the kitchen to get a glass of milk, hoping that this little solution would finally give her the sleep she'd been craving for.
But as she reached for the milk, a cacophony outside shattered the stillness of the night. Haley froze, her heart pounding in her chest. It's kind of hard to tell with the harsh rain and thunder and everything.
As if to confirm that her mind wasn't playing tricks on her, a set of audible coughs echoed just behind the door. Haley's heart thumped so loud she was afraid it might come out of her chest.
That could only be an intruder.
In Haley's sleep-deprived mind, she didn't stop to even realize that Pelican Town had never experienced a robbery in the dead of night. Instead, she quickly bolted to her room, grabbing Alex's old baseball bat he had left here one time, not even having the presence of mind to wake up Emily to face this 'intruder' together.
****
Spoiler alert, it wasn't an intruder but an idiotic farmer covered in dirt and unbelievably wet from the rain.
You were holding your rucksack close to your chest for dear life with your sword held tightly by your other hand when Haley found you slumped against the door.
"What the hell are you doing outside at this hour and in this weather?" was the first words she uttered when her eyes spotted you. She was quick to help you up and bring you inside, not even minding the mud and water accumulating from where you stood.
When you didn't respond, Haley met your eyes.
Haley's heart nearly stopped at the sight beyond her. Without being hidden by the darkness, she could finally see your whole state.
There standing is the farmer herself. Your white hoodie was tattered and looked burned. Your hoodie's sleeves are ripped too up to your upper arms, and your left arm has a cut with fresh blood still gushing out of it.
You were missing the other pair of your shoes, and your hair was disheveled and covered with slime. You even had multiple scratches and scrapes all over your body. Your right cheek has some small scratches, and blood is rushing out of the wound on your forehead.
"Yoba..." Haley's voice was barely a whisper as she gently cupped your cheeks, careful not to aggravate your wounds. Her eyes flickered to the gash on your forehead, blood still seeping from the wound. "What happened, Y/n/n? We need to get you to Harvey!"
You shook your head weakly, struggling to stand upright. "No... H-harvey," you protested, your voice strained. "H-he'll kill me."
"Y/n!" Haley's arms enveloped you in a tight embrace as you nearly stumbled over her. She wanted to reprimand you, to demand answers, but the rush of blood in her ears and the pounding of her heart against her chest prevented her from doing so.
For now, she needed to make sure you were okay.
You only grunted in response as you gave in to her, allowing her to guide you onto the cushions.
"I'm just gonna get a towel and the first aid." Her lips trembled as she said those words.
In record time, she was able to get everything she thought you'd need, afraid if she missed any more seconds you wouldn't be breathing.
When she returned to the living room, she almost went ballistic when she spotted your form unmoving from your seat.
"Y/n! Wake up, for Yoba's sake! Don't you dare die on—" Haley's words caught in her throat as you rasped out a response.
"...oh, look an angel," you managed with a small grin, your tired eyes fluttering open.
Haley couldn't help but smile softly at your attempt to lighten the mood. "Very funny," she replied, relief flooding through her as she saw you conscious, if only barely.
Wordlessly, she draped a towel over you, tucking it gently to ensure you stayed warm. It was the same blanket she used during storms like this when she felt cold herself.
With a purposeful stride, she made her way to the fireplace, adding more wood to the fire in hopes of warming you further.
"Keep your eyes open, please? I'm just gonna get some rags to clean up your wound," she requested gently.
She placed the first aid kit on the coffee table in front of you before heading to the kitchen to gather clean rags and a sponge.
Returning to the living room, she filled a bowl with tap water and carried it carefully as she made her way back to you.
With great tenderness, Haley cautiously wiped the blood from your body with the sponge, dampening it in the tap water she had prepared. She winced as the color of the water turned red.
"You lost too much blood," Haley commented, masking the shakiness of her voice. She wasn't a great fan of blood but she was not naive with treating minor injuries either. She silently thanked Yoba for letting Emily force her to learn a thing or two about first aid.
You only grunted in response to her observation.
"What happened, Y/n?" She couldn't hide the worry in her voice even if she dared try. "I should call Harvey and get you to the clinic."
You groaned as she accidentally applied too much pressure to your wound. "No... it's okay. It's n-nothing, I'm fine."
"These serious injuries don't shout nothing, Y/n. What the hell happened?"
"'I went to the mine..." you explained, and Haley waited expectantly for you to continue.
"It's storming."
"I know..." You couldn't look at her in the eye. "It's just that there's not much going on in the farm so I thought I should continue my expeditions in the mine. I thought it would be safe but..."
"But it wasn't." Haley couldn't helped but deadpan.
You visibly winced, unsure if it was because of your wounds, Haley's biting remark, or just both. "I heard from Marlon I could find rare items once I reached the hundredth floor, which I did," you explained, tapping your rucksack beside you. "But I should have known better that those items are rare for a reason. Not because they're hard to find, but because they're hard to acquire. Once I got hold of this baby," you gestured to your bag, "the whole cave was swarmed by slimes and shadow people."
"What?" Haley's voice sputtered with disbelief, her brows furrowing in concern. "Shadow people? I thought they were just myths!"
You tried to nod in confirmation, but Haley kept a firm hand on your cheeks, preventing the movement. "Uhuh, they're very real," you affirmed, your voice tinged with exhaustion. "And I can say they aren't really fond of us humans and, uh, dwarves I think. They're more scared of me than intimidating. I tried not to, y'know, hurt them."
"That's a stupid idea."
"I know," you admitted, your gaze dropping to the floor. "But given our history with them, I didn't want to give them any more reason to hate us. Plus, I was the one invading their homes."
Haley let out a heavy sigh, her shoulders slumping with weariness. "Still, you should have fought back. What if they had killed you in there? How would we have known you were down there and rotting? You're the only one crazy enough to go down there anyway."
You didn't speak after that, and Haley mistook that as compliance. She was too busy fuming at your lack of self-preservation to notice the frown creasing on your features.
After managing to cleanse the visible injuries of your body, she began to grab some clean rags to apply some pressure on your forehead and your forearm to keep your bleeding to an absolute minimum.
She cursed softly under her breath, trying to think of what to do next.
"…Y/n? Y/n, wake up, stop sleeping," Haley's voice was quiet, her tone laced with urgency as she gently tapped your cheek.
Your eyes pulled themselves open and looked tiredly at her. "Hn?"
"I need you to sit up straight and pull your hoodie off. What do you have underneath?" Haley's words were gentle but firm as she carefully supported your shoulder and hip.
"…just a tank top."
Slowly, you strained to sit upright, wincing with discomfort. Haley could tell from the way your grip tightened on her wrist that you were not comfortable sitting for very long.
With Haley's assistance, you managed to pull your hoodie off, careful not to aggravate any wounds. Once the clothes were removed, Haley's eyes lingered on the minor cuts just below your chest, blood still seeping from the wounds. She grabbed the sponge again, gently brushing away the blood from your cuts.
After cleansing the wounds, Haley applied alcohol and antibiotics, causing you to grunt in discomfort. No words were exchanged as she skillfully wrapped bandages around your forehead, forearm, and abdomen. She then helped you into warmer clothes she found in her wardrobe, her movements gentle and reassuring.
"How do you feel?" Haley bit her lip, anxious. Honestly speaking, she wasn't confident in her abilities to treat injuries, so she anxiously awaited your response, hoping she hadn't made things worse.
"…I'm alright now," you rasped, your voice hoarse with exhaustion. "…thank you, Hay."
Haley felt a wave of relief wash over her at your words. Your face had regained some color compared to earlier when you looked as pale as a ghost.
"Do you want anything to eat?" she questioned tentatively. "I'll whip you up some tea and soup."
You swallowed gently and nodded your head.
"I'll be back soon then. Rest. I'll wake you when your soup is done."
****
About twenty minutes later, Haley went back into the living room, a tray in her hands. She found you sprawled on the couch (thankfully not moving too much), embracing your rucksack in your arms once again. She wanted to question what was inside and why you couldn't part with it so much but decided to make sure you were okay first.
The things she does for you.
She placed the tray of food on the coffee table and sat beside you, taking in your sleeping form.
"Y/n/n? Food's ready," Haley said softly, tapping your thigh to rouse you from your slumber.
Startled and kind of a forced of habit, you tried to sit up straight. Thankfully, Haley was fast enough to stop you.
"Don't get up. | don't want to wrap your wounds again," Haley admonished, her tone firm.
She grabbed a pillow and propped it behind your back to elevate your head slightly. As she picked up the bowl of chicken soup, she could feel your eyes on her.
"I can feed myself, Haley. Thank you," you finally spoke. Haley's eyes met yours briefly before she averted her gaze, a flicker of emotion passing over her features.
"Clearly, you aren't capable of feeding yourself. Stop being a baby and let me do this."
Your eyes settled on her for probably a full minute before you sighed in resignation. Despite the hardened gaze she probably wore on her face, Haley gently placed a spoonful of soup in your mouth.
"I know you can, Y/n," Haley spoke after a few moments. "But you lost too much blood already, I don't want you to bleed again."
"I'm sorry for causing you all this trouble," you uttered softly.
Haley paused and finally looked at you, like, really looked at you properly this time. Since you had arrived covered in mud and blood, she had been operating on autopilot, with only one mission: ensuring you were okay. It's the only thing running through her mind, leaving no room for anything else. Mainly, she hadn't thought about the impact of her words.
"Don't be ridiculous. It's no trouble. I'm just..." Haley paused, thinking about what words to use without giving away that she cared too much. "I'm just glad that you're okay."
Once you had finished eating, Haley placed the empty bowl down and reached for a damp cloth. Brushing away a stray lock of your hair, she gently wiped away a few drops of blood and dirt, her touch surprisingly gentle. She was so focused on her task that she didn't notice you watching her quietly, your expression softening as she attended to the blemish on your face.
"Haley..." you called softly, breaking the silence. Haley looked down at you, her eyes startled. A small, appreciative smile graced your lips as you continued, "Thank you."
Haley couldn't help but smile in return. Sometimes it's hard to stay mad at you. "You can thank me by resting and making sure this won't happen again."
You chuckled softly as you closed your eyes, resting your head against the pillow once more. "No promises."
Seeing that you were getting sleepy, Haley quickly gathered the empty bowl and cup and placed them in the sink. When she returned, she extended a hand to help you up, much to your confusion.
"Come, let's get you to my room."
"Haley," you protested weakly. "I couldn't possibly impose more than I already have."
"Shut up. I won't let an injured woman sleep on the couch, Y/n."
Despite your protests, Haley managed to convince you to agree with her proposed setup. While Haley wasn't entirely keen on sleeping on the couch herself, it's not like she has a choice on the matter. The cushion is uncomfortable as hell, it's like sitting on a pile of bricks. That's more than enough reason to let you sleep on her bed. Plus, with the mess and worry weighing on her mind, she doubted she'd be able to sleep anyway.
She was about to leave to clean the mess in the living room when she finally sat you down on her bed, but a hand stopped her.
"…have you seen my bag, Hay?"
"Oh, that? Do you want me to get it for you?"
"No, no. Thanks but I can get it myself." You made a move to stand but Haley kept a firm grip on your shoulder.
Haley frowned. "You can't barely even stand. Do you think I'm gonna let you walk by yourself? What's in the bag anyway? I'll get it for you."
"I'm wounded, not disabled–" you tried to say but Haley only raised an eyebrow at you, daring you to finish your sentence. You sighed when you realized that you wouldn't win against her again. "It's... it's a gift."
"For whom?" Haley couldn't help but ask. Who could you possibly want to give a gift that you almost died just to get it?
Was it for Penny? Haley heard she liked gems as well. Or was it Maru? If she could remember correctly, tomorrow's her birthday and she seemed to like everything you can find in caves. This totally makes sense.
But why did her heart clench at the thought? More importantly, how did she even remember all this information when she didn't care about them at all?
Before you could respond, Haley left the room to retrieve your rucksack. She felt like she didn't need to hear the answer to her question.
When she returned, she wordlessly handed the bag to you, prepared to leave the room once more. However, your voice stopped her in her tracks.
"It's for you."
She turned, mouth agape. "What?"
"It's for you." You smiled warmly as you held out a familiar-looking crystalline gem, about the size of a palm, emitting a dazzling array of colors.
Haley's initial surprise quickly turned to dismay as she recognized the mineral. Her frown deepened, and a flicker of discomfort passed through her eyes at the sight of it. She knew what it was, and just the thought of touching it made her feel physically ill.
"What's wrong?" you asked, concerned at her sudden change in demeanor.
"I don't like your stupid gift!" She didn't intend for it to sound harsh, but as soon as her mouth opened, she couldn't stop the words from spilling out. "I honestly thought you'd know better than to give me something like this."
"I..."
"Keep it," she said with finality. "Good night, Y/n."
With a curt nod, she turned on her heel and stormed off, the sound of the door slamming shut echoing in the room as she left.
****
She shouldn't have said that. She knows she shouldn't have but she was just so worried she couldn't control anything else spouting from her foul mouth.
She hated how she caused the light in your eyes to die down. Hated the way you weren't able to say anything else. Hated the way she just couldn't probably express her worries properly.
Now you probably thought she hated your guts.
Which is far from the truth. Kind of the opposite actually but she's far too tired and confused to delve into her feelings further at the moment.
It's true she doesn't share the same passion for gems and rocks as her sister Emily, and people will generally thank someone who will give them a prismatic shard because for one, they are pretty, she's not gonna lie about that. Secondly, they're super rare and by extension, expensive.
Haley just couldn't bring herself to appreciate it in the same way.
She hated them with passion. And she hated people assuming she liked shiny things because of her personality.
While it's true she's kind of materialistic, it was a trait ingrained in her from years of her parents trying to compensate for their absence by showering her with gifts.
She didn't like being materialistic, but she's so used to it that it's hard to stop.
And she hated how you seemed to think the same way about her when you thought about giving her a prismatic shard as a gift. That all she ever was were just pretty and expensive gifts.
And she hated how you let yourself get hurt just to give her this.
She hated everything about this.
****
Haley spent the majority of the night cleaning the living room, hoping to tire herself out enough to dull the heaviness and emptiness in her heart. She didn't know it was possible to feel both at the same time, but there she was, experiencing it firsthand, and she despised every moment of it.
And she hated herself more now because she found herself padding her way towards her room. Her steps faltered when she saw you peacefully sleeping on her bed. A gentle smile touched her lips at the sight of your chest rising and falling in a steady rhythm.
Unable to resist, Haley approached you quietly. She carefully tucked you in, a tenderness in her actions that betrayed the turmoil in her heart. Leaning down, she pressed a soft kiss to your bandaged forehead, a gesture she had learned from her late grandmother.
"To kiss the pain away," her grandmother used to say, and Haley found solace in that belief.
With one last caress of your cheek, Haley settled onto the foot of her bed, a magazine in hand, silently hoping for the sun's rays to finally peek behind the horizon by her room's window.
****
Haley woke up surprisingly lacking any back pains. She didn't feel sleep-deprived either.
Wait—
How'd she get in her bed? You're supposed to be– Oh.
She sat up straight when she realized she was holding a letter in her hand. Straightening up the almost crumpled paper, she could recognize your handwriting immediately.
Good morning, Haley. Sorry for the disturbance last night, and thank you for taking care of me. It means a lot. I didn't want to impose more than I already have so I excused myself while you were asleep. Thank you again. — Y/n
Haley studied the letter, noting the hastily scribbled handwriting that differed from your usual neat script. She could imagine you rushing to write it just to avoid dealing with her.
It hurt more than she cared to admit. But after what she said to you, who was she to complain?
At this point, it would be a miracle if you still talked to her.
"Good morning, sis!" Emily chirped, her voice echoing through the room as Haley emerged from her room. She sat on the couch, casually knitting what appeared to be another sweatshirt.
Haley's expression was one of mild annoyance as she replied, "It's noon."
"Storm has passed but Caroline canceled, just to be safe," Emily responded, her fingers deftly working the knitting needles as she spoke. "And I know it's noon. Just wanted to emphasize you slept late, little lady."
She glanced around the living room, noting the sunlight filtering in through the curtains, indicating that the day was well underway and the storm had thankfully subsided.
"Why are you here anyway? Don't you have a yoga class to attend to?"
Haley let out a resigned groan, her movements sluggish as she made her way toward the kitchen to avoid further conversation with her sister.
"Just so you know, I saw Y/n/n come out of your room!" Emily called out from the living room, her tone playful yet teasing.
Haley froze mid-step, her grip tightening on the handle of her mug. "Wha—" Her voice wavered slightly, betraying her surprise. "Nothing happened!"
"Of course, nothing's going to happen in that state she's in," Emily retorted.
Haley couldn't ignore the sense of urgency that suddenly gripped her at the mention of your state. You're in no condition to go home all by yourself.
"Just tell me you took her home," she pleaded, her tone softening slightly as she returned to the living room.
Thankfully, Emily's too caught up with her work to notice that brief slip-up of vulnerability Haley rarely shows.
"I volunteered actually, but Penny saw us on our way and insisted she could do the job," Emily explained, her tone matter-of-fact.
"And you agreed?!" she sputtered incredulously.
"Of course, I would!" Emily readily defended. "She volunteered!"
Haley's sigh was heavy as she sank down onto the couch next to Emily. "You should have woken me up."
She could feel Emily's eyes settling on her as if trying to decipher what's got her so distressed.
"I tried, but Y/n/n won't let me. Said you needed the sleep," Emily finally answered after a few moments of silence.
"You're unbelievable." Haley couldn't help but massage the bridge of her nose at Emily's casualness about the situation as if seeing a heavily injured farmer waltz out of Haley's room was just a normal occurrence. "I suppose she told you what happened then?"
"Uh-huh. Accident in the mines, right? And she went here instead to the clinic because Harvey would kill her once he saw her state." Emily chuckled, her tone light as if discussing the weather. "He just literally told her last time to take it easy."
Haley blinked in disbelief. "And how do you know this?"
"Everyone knows this, Haley." Emily looked at her as if wondering why she didn't know this piece of information. "It's practically a common thing to see Y/n/n passed out outside in the morning."
Haley's brows furrowed in frustration, her mind racing with thoughts. Of course, she doesn't know this. If she would have known, she would have told you to take it easy. Hell, she'll help with farming if it will make things easier for you. This thing where you pass out and overwork yourself shouldn't be normalized. Actually, if anything—
She stopped herself from this line of thinking because why the hell was she even considering helping out with your farm when she, in fact, hated dirt?
"She also told me how you stepped up and helped her," Emily continued, her voice pulling Haley back to the present moment. She felt Emily's hand pat her shoulder in a gesture of reassurance. "I saw she's well-cleaned up. I'm proud of you, sis."
Haley forced a smile, though it didn't quite reach her eyes. I'm not proud of what I did, Em.
*****
Summer 10
The sky was painted with hues of pink and orange as Haley sat alone on the shore, the gentle sound of waves lapping against the sand providing a soothing rhythm to her troubled thoughts. She had come here seeking solace, the ocean always offering her a sense of peace in times of distress.
The events yesterday had bothered her more than she had let on. She convinced herself you'd understand why she reacted the way she did but a part of herself thinks she should apologize.
But as stubborn as she is, she instead spent the whole day sulking, which is what she did.
She embraced her knees closer to her chest, fingers brushing the bracelet adorning her wrist. It was her great-grandma's, a delicate piece of jewelry passed down through generations adorned in gold and pearl on the middle part. Her grandmother has given it to her instead of her mom because she'd rather wear luxurious things than some hand-me-down jewelry. But Haley loved them, and it's probably the only piece of jewelry she'd ever wear aside from the shell necklace she was wearing now.
It was a ritual of sorts for her, wearing the bracelet whenever she felt sad and alone. It's as if wearing it made her feel like her grandma was with her at this very moment, comforting her.
She was so lost in her own thoughts that she didn't realize her bracelet had slipped from her wrist. It wasn't until she reached to adjust it that she felt its absence.
"Oh, no..."
With trembling hands, she combed through the sand, her movements growing more frantic with each passing moment. Her eyes scanned the water's edge, fearing the worst as she desperately sought any glimmer of gold amidst the grains of sand.
No, no... impossible. She made sure she was far enough from the water for that specific reason.
An hour passed with no sign of the precious heirloom, and Haley felt tears welling up in her eyes as desperation threatened to consume her. She practically combed the whole beach for it and still no signs of the bracelet.
She couldn't help but slump back to the sand. She's feeling everything too much.
She's such a useless piece of shit. She couldn't even kept an important heirloom. How the hell can she even keep someone like you in her life?
Everyone's right. She's way up high in the clouds that everything she touches crumbles within her fingertips.
The tears are threatening to fall from her eyes and a sob is rising on her throat.
And just before a tear fell from her eyes, a hand shot up and grabbed her by the shoulder.
She looked up and met a pair of gray eyes staring into her own. The grayish color of your eyes is stark and deep and seemed a little bluish from the illumination of the sun. It almost looked like the sky during spring or the ocean seen from a cruising ship as a cold tundra threatened to ruin the quiet solitude of the season. Your eyes telltale thousands of untold stories with every blink, stories too ambiguous, too dark for any of them to understand. Though not dark enough to feed her thoughts of the midnight sea, of storms and drowning.
Calloused fingertips thumbed mascara stains from her cheeks with such gentleness Haley doesn't think she deserves.
"I'm here," you murmured. "What happened, Haley?"
"I l-lost it," she whispered, her voice trembling with emotion as she struggled to hold back tears. "My bracelet... it's gone! I know I had it on when I got here... But now it's gone, Y/n and I can't find it anywhere..."
She couldn't help the sob that escaped her as she burrows closer into you. She had probably stained your shirt with expensive make-up and salty tears but she didn't care as she dug her face deeper into your collar bone further and sucks a shaky breath.
"Shh," you soothed, sturdy arms wrapped around her tightened instinctively. "I'll go find it, don't worry."
"I'll never find another one like it..."
"I'm really sorry..." she felt you murmur against her hair. "I'm sure it's just around here somewhere."
"...maybe it'll wash up on another shore," she hiccuped between sobs. "I can't bear to think of it at the bottom of the ocean."
"We'll find it, okay?" you assured her, and Haley swore her heart stopped beating when you planted a soft kiss on her forehead. "Stay here. We're not leaving until we find your bracelet."
****
And truth be told you did find it.
After what seemed like an eternity of combing through the sand, Haley's eyes lit up as she spotted the familiar-looking bracelet in your hands.
With a smile so bright it rivaled the sun, you approached her.
"You found it!" she cheered as she run towards you, hopping from the sand and straight to your arms.
You weren't deterred by this and proceeded to secure your arms around her to prevent her from falling.
"Careful there, we don't want to drop it again, do we?" You barked out a laugh but Haley was quick to recognize the grunt of pain in them.
"Yoba, I'm sorry! I forgot you're still wounded!" Haley made a move to let you go but you weren't having any of it. If anything, you hold her tighter. Haley couldn't help but let out a laugh as well as she wrapped her arms around your neck just as firmly. "Thank you so much, Y/n. You're a lifesaver."
"You're welcome," you murmured against her chest. "Here, I'll help you wear it."
You gently set her down, much to her disappointment, and began to fasten the bracelet around her wrist, your actions filled with care and tenderness.
"Thank you, Y/n. Really," she murmured softly. "You're always there whenever I needed you and all you get as a thank you is me being... a bitch to you. I'm sorry."
You frowned. "You're not a... 'b' word. Far from it."
"'B' word,"she scoffed, a small smile playing at the corners of her lips "What are you, twelve?"
"Hey!" you protested in mock indignation. "I can cuss. I just don't want to use it around you. I don't want to get used to it."
Haley's gaze softened drastically. If you keep this kind of consistency around her then Haley's bound to fall hard on her back. And since it's with you, you'd probably made your way to ensure she'll be falling in a pile of pillows and flowers. You're thoughtful like that.
"I'm sorry for giving you that gift yesterday..." you started after a moment of silence. "Let me finish first," you interrupted gently when you saw her mouth open to speak. "I just... prismatic shards are rare to find and I wanted to give it to you because I thought it's something you'd like to photograph."
You took her hand in yours, a tender gesture that made Haley's heart skip a beat, her cheeks flushing slightly at the warmth of your touch. The soft morning light bathed the shoreline in a golden hue, casting long shadows across the sand as gentle waves lapped against the shore.
"But then I realized how it may have looked like to you, and I'm sorry I made you feel that way."
"Y/n..."
"So I like to try again." Without further explanation, you strode towards the boat beside Elliot's cabin, your steps confident and purposeful, and produced a bouquet of—wait, are those sunflowers?
"No way!" she sputtered as she tried to fight the grin threatening to spill on her face. You're not supposed to look this dashing walking towards her with a bouquet in hand. It's unfair!
"Yes way." you grinned at her as you handed her the flowers, your eyes sparkling with mischief. "I hope I'm forgiven."
"I'm supposed to be the one saying sorry, you dunce!" Haley playfully slapped your shoulders before accepting them. "They're beautiful, Y/n! These are my absolute favorite! Thank you."
"No worries. And if you're free you can take a look at them at my farm."
"You planted them?" Now that she had mentioned it, it sounded like a stupid question. Of course, you planted them yourself, where else can you get these flowers?
But as usual, being the kind and patient person that you are, you only beamed at her and nodded. "Yep! I planted a whole yard."
"For real?"
"For real," you affirmed, your smile widening at her incredulous expression.
"But why? I mean compared to other crops I'm sure sunflowers aren't that profitable."
You shrugged again, your expression softening. "Eh, I wasn't aiming for the profit. I was aiming for your smile."
****
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A/n: my toes are curling while I wrote this, I hope you felt the same. Anyway, the bouquet of sunflowers isn't the same bouquet that makes Haley your girlfriend. It's just a regular ol' bouquet our farmer has personally crafted because she's a simp for our queen but just too oblivious to see it. Sorry for the delay, I had just finished my clinical recently so I was busy the whole month of April. Hope y'all like this one!
P.S. comments are much appreciated!
THANK YOU FOR 2500 LIKES! YOU GUYS ARE THE BEST, SERIOUSLY.
taglist:
@joordynn
@taliiiaasteria
@iluvwomen01
#stardew valley#stardew fanfic#haley x farmer#haley x reader#stardew farmer#stardew haley#stardew emily#kiss it off me
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This might be angst but it's more for humor.
Arlecchino with a reader who's deathly afraid of spider to where they have developed a sort of spidysense for when a spider is within 12 feet of them no matter where it is.
Imagine Everytime Arlecchino is around their instincts scream spider so they maintain distance from her no matter what which leads to a misunderstanding of them hating her when in fact it's just that she reminds them of a spider.
Lmaoo this one is hilarious
Spidey senses
SpiderVibes!Arlecchino x SpiderSense!Reader
Drinking your coffee, you look out the window of the cafe. This day is like every other. The sun shines brightly through the streets of fontaine, and your drink tastes as bitter as ever. Suddenly, you feel a shiver go down your spine as you look for it. The spider.
You've always been able to feel if a spider is nearby. You're terrified of them. Call it a spidey sense. Your eyes zap around the lounge, looking for it. And finally, you find it. The little bug was hanging near the corner of the room. Although it's very far away, you still feel its earie presence, so you take your coffee and leave the cafe. You sigh as you walk out the door.
You recently started working as a caterer for the house of the hearth, which is not too strange. It's just that whenever you're in the building, your spidey sense starts tingling. Which you later found out was just a false alarm.
So you've found a solution; avoid the knave. Yeah, it's kind of rude, but overall, it's for the quality of your work.
But today is different. The orphanage owner herself called you to her office. Shivers flow down your spine as you walk up to her office door. The earie feeling of a million spiders creeping up on you settles as you open her door.
There she is in all her glory, she was already expecting you. Her gaze never left you the moment you walked into her office. "Come closer," she beckons. You take little steps closer to her desk. You dare not look her in the eyes as you do. "You wanted to talk?" She squints at you before responding. "Have I done something to offend you?" Oh shit. You quickly look up at her. She's still observing you from head to toe. "No, it's just...uh it's quite stupid actually -" she stands up from her chair and walks towards you. "Well, whatever I did, I want you to know that I am sorry."
Your face twists into shock and guilt as you try to reassure her. " No, no, you've done nothing to offend me! It's just -" she urges you to continue. And you do, you start rambling. "Well, it's just that I have, like, this really, and I mean really big fear of spiders, and I get the same kind of feeling around you.”
“Not that I'd ever compare you to a spider! I just -" You suddenly get snapped out of your rambling. She's...laughing? She looks back down at you as she recollects herself. A small cough makes its way through her throat.
She looks down at her desk, her face looking conflicted. A smirk graces her face as she suddenly stands, slowly walking toward you. “Ma’am…?” You take a step back out of habit. A slight twinge of fear makes its way through your core. She corners you against the wall, hovering over you with a hand against the wall.
“Do you feel it now?” Her sultry voice cascades through the air. You shiver at the sound. Squirming under her gaze, you nod. “Hm.” She makes a sound of acknowledgment before pulling back. Your body relaxes as she steps away, yet somehow you feel slightly disappointed. “That’s all. You can leave now.”
SORRY ITS SO SHORT
Its also been a little while since i wrote a fic so im a bit rustyy
Should i do a part 2…?
#x reader#genshin#genshin impact#arlecchino x reader#arlecchino genshin#i love arlecchino#arlechinno genshin#arlecchino#arlechinno x reader#gn reader#reader insert
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warped in your warmth
— ★ fluffy headcanons!
pairing - newjeans x female reader
synopsis - how each member reacts when you come home after a tough day and just silently hug them, seeking comfort.
genre - fluff, slight angst (but very soft)
warning - nothing to worry about ig
a/n - school has been wearing me out and im feeling more tired than usual these days. writing this brought me some comfort, so i hope it does the same for u! :)
minji (kim minji)
minji always senses when something is wrong, even if you don’t say a word.
the second you approach her, and wrap your arms around her without a sound, she immediately knows that you’re carrying a heavy burden.
her arms instinctively envelop you, pulling you into her chest as if she could shield you from all the bad in the world.
but she feels the tension in your body, the way your fingers tighten around her shirt, and her heart sinks.
“baby.. what’s wrong..?” she whispers, her voice full of concern.
but when you don’t answer, minji doesn’t push.
instead, she pulls you down onto the couch, cradling you in her lap, resting her chin gently on your head.
the silence is deafening, but she knows that’s what you need right now. she strokes your back softly, a steady rhythm in sync with your breath, trying to calm the storm inside you.
it breaks her heart not knowing how to fix it, but she’s willing to stay like this as long as you need.
“i’m here,” she’d finally say, her voice cracking slightly. “you don’t have to say anything.. i’m just here..”
and that’s when you start to cry.
minji’s grip tightens, and for a moment, it’s hard to tell who’s comforting who, because her heart aches just as much seeing you like this.
she’d hold you until your tears stop, whispering reassurances between every sob, promising that no matter how hard the world gets, she’s not going anywhere.
hanni (pham hanni)
when you hug hanni out of nowhere, burying your face in her neck without a word, she feels a weight in her chest she can’t explain.
her usual bright, bubbly energy dims as she pulls you even closer, her arms wrapped tightly around you like she’s afraid you might slip away.
“hey.. hey, what’s going on..?” she’d whisper.
but when you don’t respond, she doesn’t ask again. instead, she sways with you gently, her cheek resting against your hair.
hanni can’t stand seeing you sad, but she knows sometimes all you need is for her to be there, holding you as the world falls apart around you.
still, it eats at her, the silence.
she hates not knowing how to help, feeling powerless to lift the weight off your shoulders.
after a while, she’ll try to break the tension with something light, “you know.. i’m pretty sure hugging me like this is illegal... because i’m already on the verge of stealing your heart, and now it’s a done deal.”
it’s a lame joke, but that’s hanni—trying to make you smile, even if it’s through tears.
when she feels you relax slightly, she breathes a sigh of relief, knowing she’s gotten through to you just a little.
she’ll keep hugging you, peppering soft kisses on your forehead until you’re ready to talk, or maybe just stay in her arms a little longer.
danielle (danielle marsh)
danielle’s heart practically shatters the moment you cling to her without a word.
she’s so in tune with your emotions that she almost feels your sadness as her own.
“oh.. y/n/n...” she murmurs, wrapping you in her arms so tightly that it’s like she’s trying to fuse your hearts together.
she doesn’t ask what’s wrong right away because she knows that sometimes the weight of the world is too much to put into words.
she’ll sit you down gently, her fingers playing with your hair as she whispers soothing words in your ear, “i’m here.. i’m right here, okay...?”
danielle would probably start humming a soft tune, trying to calm your racing thoughts, her voice warm and gentle.
but underneath that calm exterior, her heart is aching, wishing she could take your pain away.
“i hate seeing you like this.. it’s okay to cry, you know..” she’d say softly, and that’s when the tears would come.
her thumb would wipe away every tear, her gaze never leaving your face, eyes full of love and concern.
she listens when you’re finally ready to talk, holding your hand, squeezing it softly as if to say, i’m not letting go.
danielle will reassure you endlessly, “we’ll get through this, you and me..”
her words are like a soft lullaby, and in that moment, you realize she’s not just comforting you—she’s your safe place, the one who makes the pain feel a little less heavy.
haerin (kang haerin)
haerin’s quiet, observant nature is her greatest strength when it comes to moments like these.
the second you wrap your arms around her without explanation, she knows you need comfort.
she doesn’t say anything at first, just holds you tightly, her arms a protective shell around you.
her fingers gently run up and down your back, a silent gesture of reassurance, and she rests her head against yours, breathing you in.
there’s a deep sadness in her cat-eyes that you can’t see because haerin feels your pain as if it’s her own.
she stays silent, offering you her quiet strength instead of words.
but the way you’re holding on so tightly, like you’re afraid to let go, makes her chest tighten.
she wishes she could take the weight off your shoulders, but all she can do is stay with you, offering the warmth of her embrace.
after a while, she’d whisper, “i’m here.. i’m not going anywhere.”
haerin’s quiet presence is all you need, and even though she’s not asking questions, she’s listening in her own way.
she’d guide you to sit down, pulling you onto her lap if you’d let her, her hands still running through your hair.
she doesn’t push you to talk, but when you do, she listens with her whole heart, nodding quietly, her fingers never leaving your skin.
“we’ll get through this... together” she’d finally say, her voice soft but firm as if the world could fall apart.
but she’d still be there, holding you together.
hyein (lee hyein)
hyein is playful by nature, but when you silently hug her, she knows instantly that something’s wrong.
she’s a little taken aback at first, her arms stiff as she tries to figure out what to do.
but once she realizes you’re seeking comfort, she softens, pulling you closer.
“hey.. what’s going on?” she asks softly.
she’d hold you tightly, though it’s not as natural for her to stay still in moments like these.
but she tries, for you.
hyein might fumble a bit at first, unsure how to comfort you, but she’d quickly figure it out.
“you’re scaring me, you know..” she’d whisper, trying to coax a response out of you.
but when you stay silent, she presses her cheek against yours, her hands running up and down your arms in a soothing motion.
she hates seeing you like this, and it makes her anxious not knowing how to fix it.
so she does the only thing she knows how—she tries to lighten the mood.
“okay, so.. we’re just gonna sit here like this forever? i’m cool with that if you are,” she’d say, her voice teasing, though there’s a slight tremor in it.
eventually, she’d coax a small laugh out of you, and that’s when she feels like she’s done her job.
but she doesn’t let go—not yet.
instead, she keeps holding you, because she knows that right now, all you need is to be held.
#new jeans x reader#newjeans#fluff#kim minji x reader#minji x reader#kim minji#hanni x reader#fanfiction#oneshot#pham hanni x reader#danielle marsh x reader#danielle x reader#kang haerin x reader#haerin x reader#lee hyein x reader#hyein x reader
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a month | charles leclerc
type: written + smau
pairing(s): childhood best friend!reader x charles leclerc
summary: charles confessed his feelings for you after you two hung out on a random day, but you werent really sure if you felt the same way or not; so he proposed a suggestion that you were willing to do.
warning(s): readers a nasty girl, suggestive
fc: random girlies off of pinterest!
---
"y/n, ive liked you for nearly a year now and you might be wondering why im confessing out of the blue, but i just wanted to let you know since its been suffocating me this whole time. the way i couldnt say anything too harsh when you were dating your bum ex because i was afraid you would hate me for the rest of your life, but enough of that. if you dont feel the same way...i hope that we still remain friends with the same banter we have now.." charles confesses as you look at him with emotions you couldnt quite express.
you guys were on the beach, the sunset in full view, the blanket on the sand with empty wine glasses and plates, the speaker playing a song you both did not add to the playlist, and hearing random people hold conversations as they pass by you.
"charles..." he looks at you dearly and youve never noticed till now, but he had always looked at you like that and you felt dumb realizing it just now.
"yes..?" he stares into your eyes lovingly as he eagerly awaits to what your answer would be.
you stare back into his eyes that had the sunset illuminating in it, making his eyes the most beautiful thing right now; apart from his face that also had the sunsets ambiance painted perfectly on his elegant features.
"i..." you hesitate on what to say, "im not sure..."
"youre not sure? so is this your way of saying no...?" he asks, desperate eyes wanting a fast response before he embarrasses himself.
"no!" you quickly say as his shoulders ease up, "i meant it as in like...im not quite sure about my feelings for you."
"how about we date for a limited period of time?" he suggests as your left brow lifts up in confusion.
"why?" you ask, completely confuse.
"to see if you truly have feelings for me and its not out of pity." he smiles at you and you felt like your heart melted on the spot.
"how long would we date for?" you ask again.
"A month and if you dont have feelings for me by the end of the time limit, then we can go back to being friends or strangers..." he explains as you nod your head along, finally understanding it, "and if you want to end it early, you have the freedom to do so. what do you say?" he takes out his hand for a handshake.
"that sounds good, charles." you take your hand in his for a handshake.
you both feel a fresh breeze soothe in; making your hair cover your face, but before you could move it, charles had already pushed your hair out of your face and tucked it in behind your ears. lub-dub.
"sooo...do we start now or what?" you ask as he chuckles.
"we can start tomorrow if you want, mon cheri. this might a little too much for you in one night." he sweetly smiles at you before he gets up, "lets call it a night for now? we have to head to the circuit tomorrow." you nod your head and now it was your turn to stand up.
the two of you cleaned up your area before you headed out to his car ready to leave.
---
y_n
Liked by charles_leclerc, maxverstappen1, lei_ah and 121,173 others
y_n he jokingly told me to go sit in the back because leo was passenger princess (i dont think he was joking...😟)
tagged: charles_leclerc
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maxverstappen1 i dont think he was either...
y_n i know he was jealous when leo was cuddled up w me and sleeping
charles_leclerc i almost stopped the car and let you drive instead...😒
y_n JUST MAD HE LIKES ME BETTER ✋😝🤚
charles_leclerc yeah i am thats why im pushing you to the bushes.
maxverstappen1 HAHAHA I JUST SAW THAT 🤣🤣
user1 STOP NOT MAX WITNESSING Y/NS ATTEMPTED MURDER 😭😭😭
y_n I DIDNT EVEN GET DONE READING AND ALL OF A SUDDEN I BLINK IM IN THE BUSHES 😟😟😟
charles_leclerc I TOOK A VIDEO 🤣🤣🤣
y_n NO YOU DIDNT CHARLES 🫵 NO YOU DIDNT 🫵
charles_leclerc YES I DID 🙈
y_n 🤬🤬🤬🤬
user1 the chaos under maxs comment 😭😭
user2 IKR I ALMOST PEED MYSELF 💀
user2 Y/N STRAIGHT UP GOT VIOLATED WHILE MAX SAW THE WHOLE THING 😭😭😭
y_n THEY ARE SO MEAN
charles_leclerc so cute ❤️
y_n awhh thank you ☺️❤️
charles_leclerc i meant leo...but you too! 😊
y_n WTV DONT SPEAK TO ME 😒😒😒
landonorris yeah id act the same way too after that.
maxverstappen1 the audacity...
y_n YOU ACT LIKE YOU WOULDNT DO THE SAME IF I POSTED YOUR CATS
maxverstappen1 youre right, my bad. 😉
---
charles_leclerc posted on their story !
👁️ 987,172
y_n replied to charles_leclercs story
y_n IK YOU DID NOT.
charles_leclerc IT WAS TOO FUNNY TO NOT POST IM SORRY BABE
y_n DONT BABE ME RN I WAS MURDERED. 😟
y_n now im starting to doubt if you really like me or not 😡
charles_leclerc noooo :(
charles_leclerc dont ever doubt such a thing. i promise ill be sweeter ❤️😊
y_n uh huh 🙄
charles_leclerc youll see, mon cherie 🙈
maxverstappen1 replied to charles_leclercs story
maxverstappen1 still cannot believe you did that to your lover
charles_leclerc even tho i was the one that confessed, i still cant break out of my habit on teasing her 😔
maxverstappen1 thats true friendship right there
maxverstappen1 maybe youll break out of it one day
charles_leclerc perchance 😔😔
---
"here you go, my lady." charles says as he opens the car door for you.
after everything happened in the morning, you were jokingly salty about getting pushed into the bushes after charles confessed his love to you the day before, but charles felt bad after you said you had doubts about his love for you. to make it up, he promised to take you out to dinner.
"why thank you, sir." you got out and did a little curtsy to which he found cute and does a bow in return, "oh you are so adorable." you smile from ear to ear.
"i should be saying that to you, cutie." he says leading you to the restaurant where he reserved you both a nice spot he often sits at since it had a nice view.
you guys sat down and started conversing with one another and stopping every time a waiter came to you guys to ask questions, but after theyre done you would converse again about random things like: 'best hairstyle?' 'would you survive as a cook if gordon ramsay was your head chef?' and many more.
the time passed by too quick and you guys were already done with your food. you both made your way out of the restaurant and waited outside for charles car to arrive since it was parked somewhere else.
"that was really great, charles. i had fun." you smile shyly as he chuckles.
"sooo first date gone right?" he asks as you laugh.
"yeah, apart from this morning." you joked as he laughs.
"i guess im just so used to teasing you often. it was some sort of reflex, will work on it though..." he says putting out his hand as you laid your hand on his, "mon amour." he kissed your hand as you look away trying to hide your expression.
"i dont mind the teasing honestly, it would be unfair if i was the only one doing it and you arent doing it back to me." you say as you chuckle finally looking him in the eyes.
"youre right. plus i dont really know if i wouldve broken out of that habit." you both laugh out loud while hitting each other.
the car eventually arrives while you two were hugging and flipping each other off, having fun in general, and it was time for the both of you to drive off and depart. during the car ride there were two new things you noticed: one, charles let you have the aux and two, he held your hand the whole way to your home.
it was only the first day and your heart and mind already knew the answer.
---
f1wagnews
Liked by user1, user2, and 28,274 others
f1wagnews charles leclerc and y/n l/n spotted together being lovey and hugging each other! there are already rumors speculating that the two of them are already dating, but some just say its the childhood best friend bond that they both have.
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user1 guys theyd lowkey be cute tho...idk ive been cheering for y/n to be with charles ever since i knew abt them being close 😭
user2 FRRR LIKE THE GENUINE BOND THEY HAVE.
user3 how both of them go from hugging to charles flipping her off and y/n sticking out her tongue...I NEED THIS TYPE OF RELATIONSHIP 😭🙈
user4 idk guys im kinda with alexandra on this one. i only see a friendship dynamic between y/n and charles, but when hes with alex, i see puppy love 💕☺️
user3 i was team alex but i havent seen her around the paddocks lately after what she did to y/n. it was also rumored that shes dating a football player, so im not really sure that her and charles are friends anymore. charles blocked her im pretty sure.
user5 WHATTT??? I DID NOT KNOW THIS. WHAT HAPPENED BETWEEN HER AND Y/N???
user3 YEAHH I LEARNED ABOUT IT LAST WEEK 😭😭 so basically alex has been cold to y/n the whole time they interacted and would give her compliments that were clearly backhanded and ofc y/n had enough of it because she genuinely wanted to befriend alex but ig alex was jealous of y/ns friendship w charles and she straight up just started lashing out on y/n and charles walked in and defended y/n then everything just went crazy. i can tag you in the post i saw.
user5 omg that is crazyyyy. no wonder alex was reposting about girl best friend hate tiktoks 😭
user1 YEAHH I WAS WONDERING WHO IT WAS FOR BUT IG IK NOW 😭😭😭
user1 i mean y/n cant really help it since they quite literally grew up together, bathed together when they were kids, and were around each other 24/7 due to their mothers being close. ik this girl is sick of male drivers rn because thats what she mostly grew up with. thats why shes also close to max, somebody fr get this girl a girl best friend 😔😭
user2 REAL. like this girl was just happy she had somebody in the paddock to be friends with and is a girl that was friends with charles because y/n cannot socialize with the wags in the paddocks to save herself, but that whole thing went down. shes also talked about how she would set charles up on dates hoping he would find the love of his life and then she would take his love of his love and make her her girl. give my girl a chanceeee 😭
---
charles_leclerc
Liked by y_n, maxverstappen1, landonorris, and 1,281,173 others
charles_leclerc the pizza was somehow edible 😇
tagged: y_n
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maxverstappen1 that looks like a ball sack if you turn it upside down
charles_leclerc @/y_n I TOLD YOU.
y_n GOSH YOU GUYS ARE SUCH BOYS
maxverstappen1 i mean..we are...
y_n i need girl friends 😔
charles_leclerc are you feeling sick of your boyfriendalready? 🙁
y_n after what you added on to your pizza after you turned it upside down...maybe charles 😔😔
user3 the little typing error is making me delusional but we all know what he meant 😭
user1 fr his space just completely stopped 😭😭
landonorris y/nnnnn lets hangout when???
y_n tomorrow!!!!
landonorris yayyy ❤️
y_n ❤️❤️❤️
user5 wait a minute...
user1 HOLD AWWWNNN.
user5 guys are lando and y/n dating? 😭
user1 my charles x y/n ship is slowly sinking as im reading the comment
y_n YEAH NO WONDER YOU WERE LAUGHING AT ME WHEN YOU WERE CHECKING MY BACK. GOT A WHOLE HAND ON MY BACK MATE
charles_leclerc HAHAHA 🤣🤣
---
"come on babe...are you really mad at me?" you ask him as he turns his head around, completely ignoring you.
its been 2 weeks since you guys started "dating" and so far no one really knows you guys are a thing, only rumors here and there which are quickly shut down by the fact that we are close childhood friends.
"charles, sweetie, its just an emoji." you say to him as he still gives you a cold shoulder.
whats happening now is that: charles posted on his instagram last night, looked at the comments, and saw what lando commented and what you replied with.
"if its just an emoji, why is it the symbol of love then?" he bitterly says, "also its not the emoji. its how the people reacted...theyre probably thinking you and lando are a thing."
"eugh, lando? babe...be for real and think that through. hes like my little brother..and plus it doesnt matter what other people think." you say walking up to him.
"well i care, y/n..." he frowns a little but turns around to look at you.
"awhhh is charlie jealous?" you ask him with a smile as he rolls his eyes.
"of course i a–" you cut him off with a kiss, to which he reciprocates.
"well dont be, mon tresor. im with you right now arent i?" he nods his head, "so spend time with me instead of giving me the silent treatment."
the both of you stare into each others eyes, deep in thought, not wanting to break contact or ruin the moment, but after a while; you straddle his lap so you could be closer to him. after you positioned yourself properly, you start to trace his features with your eyes. noticing the way his pupils dilate when he looks at you, his beautiful dimples that slowly appears as he smiles, and the way his lashes look so luscious and dreamy whenever he blinks. eventually, you leaned in for a kiss to which he quickly responds to and the night quickly turns into a blur right after that.
---
y_n
Liked by charles_leclerc, maxverstappen1, landonorris, and 351,183 others
y_n ive been a nasty girl xxx 🙈
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maxverstappen1 knew you were a freak
y_n learned from the best 😊
maxverstappen1 did you do the hawk tuah on it?
y_n MAX GET IUT OF HERHWHW WHO TAUGHT YOU THAT
danielricciardo it was not me.
maxverstappen1 it was you.
y_n DANNY WHEN I CATCH YOU I SWEAR
charles_leclerc whats a "hawk tuah" 🤨?
danielricciardo ill demonstrate it for you next race😏😏 ❤️ liked by author
y_n LMFAOOAHDJW
user6 SAINT LAURENT CONDOMS???? ARE YOU GETTING FREAKY WITH BILL GATES???
y_n IKR SHOULDA SEEN MY FACE. I DIDNT EVEN KNOW THEY WAS FREAKY RICH LIKE THAT...
landonorris YOUR LINGERIE ON THE LAMP??? TMI Y/N. TMI.
y_n somebody matched my freak im sorry
user1 HER VERSION OF A SOFT LAUNCH IM CRYINGGGG 😭😭😭
user2 WE LOST A BADDIE
user5 y/n this isnt you honey come home the kids miss you
charles_leclerc SOMEBODY MATCHED YOUR FREAK???
y_n matched it a little too well...ive been limping...
charles_leclerc no wonder i had to carry you.
user3 CHARLES LMFAOO 😭😭
user1 DIDNT EVEN KNOW THE REASON WHY HE WAS CARRYING HER 😭
user3 watch it be lando goodbyeee 😭
user6 BABE PLEASE THIS ISNT HOW YOU SOFT LAUNCH THIS IS ATTEMPTED MURDER 😔😔😔
---
the day came and it had been officially a month since you guys started the deal charles had offered, and to be fair during the month when you guys were together; you slowly forgot about the deal you had agreed to and just fully accepted your love for charles.
both of you are now at the very same spot where he had offered the deal to you and confessed his undying love for you. the place where it all began.
"y/n...." charles says mumbling into your neck.
"yes, charles?" you respond, brushing his hair with your fingers as the waves sang in melody.
"you know why i brought you here right?" he lifts up his head to face you completely.
"uhm...to have a...picnic date?" you answer, completely oblivious to the answer of the question he asked.
"what did we have a deal on a month ago?" he chuckles at your response, giving a hint.
"oh...OH!" you say with a shocked expression.
"since you know now...whats your answer going to be, y/n?" he asks completely fearful about your answer.
"you should know by now, charles." you say to him as a brow lifts up from his face.
"no, no i do not know. what is the answer?" he asks again now scared seeing your face hold no expression.
"look at the ocean, leclerc." you say as he obediently does what he was asked.
"what is the matter with the oce—" you cut him off with a kiss as he turned around to ask you a question. it shocked him a bit, but kisses you back; gently.
you guys kissed for a while until you pulled back gasping for air as his lips follow yours in suit to which you put a finger on, pushing his head back.
"let me catch my breath, mon tresor..." you exhale quietly after your sentence.
during the time you were catching your breath, charles was fixated by you. the way your hair fell perfectly in front of your face, your swollen lips, how your chest heaved up and down softly...yet erotically, and just how you looked in general with the moon shining down on you. giving you the most ethereal look that photographers wish to take a picture of.
you look up finally and you make eye contact.
"so whats your answer..." charles quietly asks as you chuckle.
"that wasnt enough of an answer?" he shakes his head as you giggle, "yes, charles. my answer is yes...it has been my answer since day one; i wasnt quite sure...but im quite definitely sure now." you smile at him as you give him a peck.
out of nowhere charles stands up and runs to the water, yelling and splashing in joy. you stand up quickly taking off in a sprint to go join in with your, now, boyfriend.
the beautiful melody the waves sang suddenly sounded more beautiful with the collaboration of splashes and pure laughter harmonizing with the waves by you and your lover, charles.
---
charles_leclerc
Liked by y_n, maxverstappen1, landonorris, danielricciardo, and 1,982,173 others
charles_leclerc a month? @/y_n
tagged: y_n
Comments on this post have been limited
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y_n
Liked by charles_leclerc, landonorris, danielricciardo, maxverstappen1, and 729,713 others
y_n yes, a month. ❤️ @/charles_leclerc
tagged: charles_leclerc
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---
authors note(s): WOOP WOOP FIRST LECLERC SMAU HOW WE FEELINGGF
thank you sm for the crazy support!!!! im still trying to figure out how tumblr works...but i think im slowly getting the hang of it..maybe...
#formula 1#f1 fanfic#f1 imagine#f1 smau#charles leclerc#charles leclerc x reader#charles leclerc smau#formula one#f1 x reader#f1 x you#f1#f1 fic#smau#fanfic#charles leclerc fanfic#charles leclerc x you#cl16 x reader#cl16#cl16 imagine#cl16 fanfic#cl16 smau#cl16 x y/n
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I LOVE YOU, IM SORRY. | C.SC
pairing : seungcheol x reader
WHAT !! : in which youre unsatisfied with the way you treated seungcheol throughout your relationship, but destiny will always bring you back….right? (or in which you messed up your relationship with him and the 4 times you tried to fix it and the 1 time it worked out)
warnings: so self indulgent, if ur my ex bby i know we’re still contacted but come back 💔💔💔💔 readers a ass in the beginning, open ending
w.c : 2872
a/n : i never really see angst where the reader messes up and i decided to display it with my experience el oh el . hope you all enjoy
-
you laid in bed beating yourself up for the nth time. youve been in a rotation of screaming into your pillow, walking around the house, and journaling (or at least attempting to) but you still cant get the guilt and regret off your shoulders
its been almost 2 years since, since the argument, since the day you ended things, since the day you ran away afraid of hurting yourself and let alone him even more than you already did.
everyone you know has told you to move on because theyre sure he already has too but its harder said than done, how could you go on with life knowing you hurt someone who was so willing to give you everything you wanted because of your own selfishness
and as bad as it sounded, you hoped he’d reach out first as desperate as you wanting to catch up so you can show him the new version of you. the version who was ready to commit, a better person, willing to love him correctly. not crazy or stupid like the one before, the one he had the unfortunate case of dating
so now youre stuck in this 3 activity cycle because no one wants to hear you mope about your asshole tendencies to seungcheol, youve sent him a couple messages apologizing and hoping to be civil to which he replied accepting every single one a couple hours later
why wasnt it enough though?
its because you wanted more, and you knew it. you wanted him to reply immediately and accept your apology as well as begging you to come back because you knew not even deep
down, straight foward youd accept it
you longed for his ‘good mornings’, ‘i miss you’, ‘i love you’’s that you took for granted
all because of that one day (s)
you decided that this cycle of wanting ends now, all these cowardly attempts will stop. so you grabbed your coat and put on your shoes and drove to his place
to make up for that night and those days
-
“i just dont understand why you wont talk to me whenever you feel a certain way instead of running away” seungcheol sighed as he ran his hands through his hair as he sat on the couch watching you pace around the living room
“what part of ‘i dont want to’ do you not get” you raised your voice slightly as you paused to stand infront of seungcheol
“i dont get it because i love you.” he replied calmly as he reached to grab your hand and caressing it. and as he looked up at you you saw it in his eyes, the longing for those 3 words you never said back to him. he was always patient with you, the first time he said ‘i love you’ to you he saw the hesitation and understood, he allowed you go at your own pace until you felt ready. but it got to a point, a point where he started to doubt himself and to a point where you could read it.
“i…i cant.”
its not like you didnt love him, you loved him more than anything, more than yourself
and thats what scared you
you know the saying “you cant love someone until you love yourself”?
bullshit.
he was the reason you forgot you hated yourself because you were so inlove with him
and your pride was the one thing holding you back from facing the fear
“what?” seungcheol said pulling you out of your thoughts
you looked back at him to see his eyebrows furrowed
“you cant say you love me or you cant love me?” his tone became a bit more furrious
you didnt say anything, just stood there which was the first mistake you realized you made throughout this relationship out of the many
“im willing to wait for you yn, because i love you. i love you so much, i never want to rush you to tell me you love me back but its been almost months now. im starting to doubt myself”
you didnt know how to process his words, not knowing how to comfort him you did what you did best
leave.
“this is too much for me” thats all you managed to get out before you left the house without looking back
you heard his protest as you left but they went ignored, like how seungcheol felt in your relationship
-
seungcheol stood there watching the door close. he never understood how people could be so shocked they freeze but now that he was experiencing it first hand he didnt know what to do
should he run after you?
leave you alone?
was this the end between you two?
this couldnt be, you wouldnt let a small argument get between you two
right?
-
the first time reaching out.
seungcheol had reached out to you, it was about a week since you left the house without deciding if you two were actually over
he spent each day opening the message app and clicking on your contact name hoping he’ll see the 3 bubbles letting him know you were still thinking of him
so when he was finally fed up with it he sent you a message hoping itll give you a change of heart, he wanted you to know he didnt mean any of the bad things he said and that he still cares for you
“hi, i hope this finds you well but uhm i just wanted to know where we stand. im sorry if i overwhelmed you the last time we saw each other but i really want us to work out, you mean a lot to me and i love you, so much. but i cant keep hanging onto this silence from you. text me back when you can? i love you, and im sorry”
read
you had woken up from your pity nap to his message and spent the entire following week fighting the thoughts in your head
if you replied and told him you wanted to come back, youd still be in doubt about yourself and cause more trouble for the both lf you guys, but if you replied and told him you didnt want to get back together, itll cause a very strange and awkward tension between you two so just ignored the message and left him wondering
now that you think about it, it was a horrible idea but you didn’t know how to solve this. you didnt want to bring more pain to him but you couldnt bring pain to yourself either
so you stared at the message he sent a month later
“i waited for a month and im assuming we’re over? it sucks but i respect your decision. i hope you find someone for you, thank you for the memories we’ve had you’ve been good to me. i love you and im sorry for not being enough”
read
laying on your bed wrapped in a blanket resting on your side the tears fell on your phone. you didnt want him to think he wasnt enough when it was the opposite way around, but its too late now. all you could do was hope he found peace
-
seungcheol sat on the couch and sighed resting against it as he opened up the message only to see read for the nth time. was it really over between you two? is he never gonna be able to wake up to your face again?
maybe thats the way life goes
he just pushed his luck a little too much
-
the second time reaching out
its been a couple months, you kept his last messages in your ‘recent messages’ on your texting app. so each time you opened to text someone you still saw his contacy name with the words “i waited over a month….” underneath. youd be lying if you said it didnt hurt but it did, it stung that you let go of one of the best people in your life
so out of impulse, instead of texting your bestfriend a reply to her latest message you clicked on his name
“cheol 🩶”
“this is really sudden but i cant help but still feel guilty. i shouldve been better and replied to you but i was really scared. i was scared of hurting you and myself but im sorry, im sorry for not reaching out sooner, im
sorry for being a dick, im sorry for not being a good partner. i hope youre doing good and i wish you the best”
you held your breath as you sent it. it took you about a hour constantly rephrasing the words. you didnt want it to sound too lengthy or too short. you wanted to sound sincere but not that you longed for him even though you did.
took him exactly 3 hours and 19 minutes from when you sent the message to reply. you waited 22 minutes to open it, you kept refreshing the screen because his reply only had 12 words.
12
words
“no problem, i wish you the best, you were a good partner :)”
the smiley face really topped it off you could see how he was trying to downplay the situation to have you feel not as guilty , but you were ready for anything
to be blocked, to get yelled at over text, for him to be disappointed but this really twisted the knife
he was so civil about it, he wasnt angry, he wasnt stressed about it
so why were you?
maybe it was the fact you were the asshole while he was the victim. the victim who stood by you and tried to understand you only to be hurt. deciding not to push it you left his message on read and turned off your phone and sighed
-
when seungcheol got home from hanging out with jeonghan, he turned on his phone after not checking it to see your contact name as one of the first notifications. he said rubbed his eyes frantically and turned off and on his phone again to make sure he wasnt seeing things
clicking on the notification his heart clenched
he hoped you meant everything you said, but its kinda hard to believe when all he could see were words. he’d much rather hear it from you but he doubted his luck at this point.
sending a small reply of what hes able to get out now he hoped youll rack up the courage for you to see him, or maybe he will
-
the third time reaching out
the third time you reached out wasnt your proudest moment. your friend convinced you to finally go out after mopping about seungcheol for the last months. the main point she gave was
“you already apologized, he forgave, what are you waiting for now?”
she was right, he clearly showed no sign of wanting to get back together so you have to live your life without him whether you liked it or not
and it didnt turn out too well. all you could remember was drinking your face off and then opening your eyes in your bed, still in your outfit. assuming your friend brought you home you picked up your phone and unlocked it to immediately see your text log with seungcheol making your heart drop
there were 3 messages in total since your last apology
“chwol i msiss hou so mwuch came beck i love you se mych”
you saw he read it immediately but took 19 minutes to reply
“yn your drunk, get some rest. stay safe”
“im nat i love you, im sorry”
seungcheol left you on seen.
somehow to your and his suprise the only word you could spell right was ‘i love you’
especially seungcheol. the whole day he subconsciously kept going back to look at the message to see if youd come back and apologize or even try and clear things up but the most important thing to him was the “i love you”
did you mean it?
when he first saw the message on his phone at 2:22 from you saying “i love you” his heart stopped, well until he read the rest of the message, it was clear you were drunk but he hated how it still had an effect on him
drunk words were sober thoughts but still, he wished to hear those 3 words from you when you were intoxicated.
seungcheol still longed for you to tell him you love him even after these months but his expectations for you were low. as much as he’d hate to say it, he began to give up on the chance you’d love him again
but he still loved you.
-
the fourth time reaching out (sorta)
its been a year and a half since you both had ended things. admittedly you realized your issues and worked on yourself, you weren’t ashamed to admit that you were a horrible person before cause you were. but now you can at least be proud with the person youve became
you took time away from those associated with seungcheol to avoid seeing him and breaking down your healing process but now you were finally ready to face everyone and most importantly
apologize to seungcheol in person
walking inside hoshi’s party the music was blasting, everyone was talking to one another and you walked around looking for some familiar faces.
jeonghan was the first to greet you, he hugged you while mumbling questions asking of how youve been and what youve been up to. but as he hugged you he turned your body to face seungcheol.
you looked up and saw his eyes. he stared at you as if he never saw you before and froze once again
the same way he did when you left
jeonghan whispered a “go talk to him” before leaving.
as cliche as it sounded, in a room full of people you both stared at eachother blanky
he wss the first to smile slight at you and you took that as a go sign to walk to him
as you made you way to him time moved slow, it seemed like everyone wasnt there anymore, just you and him
and like time went back to normal youre now standing infront of him
“seung-“
“cheol!”
you heard another voice call him by his nickname
looking for the voice you found it belonged to another woman.
it was hard to not assume the worst especially when you looked up and saw his embarrassed face.
“i love you….im sorry”
those two words were all you said before you left
again.
but this time you walked away with not the regret of being afraid but instead regretting the fact you let him
go to be with someone else
with tied in with how much you hated yourself for being so selfish you couldnt or rather didnt want to imagine him with anyone other than you
but there was no one to blame but you
walking back to your car you sat in the driver seat and laid on the horn while screaming letting out every single feeling youve felt and held in despite thinking youve let go
i guess somethings never leave
your love for him.
“excuse me?” you looked up at the old lady
you rolled down the window and tilted your head
“your horn” she awkwardly laughed
“oh right. sorry.” you chuckled awkwardly as she left, you reclined your seat back wanting to disappear
-
the fifth time reaching out
seungcheol spent the entire night and day after the party consoling himself. he tried to convince himself that you already moved on so what happened last night didnt mean much.
you werent worried were you?
she was just his cousin but you wouldnt be jealous or bothered because you had moved on
moved on
moved on
moved
oh fuck it. he hoped you didnt.
but he had spent the entire year and a half, almost 2 years afraid to go for what he wants. but life was too short
life was too short to hold him to get you back
whether it ends with him getting slapped or completely heart broken
its okay with him
so as he opens his door with his shoss on he-
you.
you looked as almost shocked as him as he opened the door
you both jumbled your words
“i-“
“well-“
“but-“
“hi.”
you both said
there was a moment of silence of you two deciding what to do, or who should speak first
you shook your head and decided to go first
“i love you
im sorry.”
he froze, the words he longed to hear from you finally hit his ears. there was no ‘and’ between the ‘i love you’ and ‘im sorry’. its as if you were apologizing for loving him like you were scared
and he knew you were. so hearing it made it 10 times better
the silence from him caused you to be able to hear your heartbeat, you looked up and seen him smiling warmly as he opened his arms
your lips curved up slightly as you entered his embrace
“i love you
i havent stopped”
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