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burnedbyshoto · 4 years ago

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go the distance

(will you) go the distance

— You’re perfectly content in life except for the fact that you are not dating Deku. When his best friend won’t help you out, you turn to the dark side to get what you want.

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pairing: pro hero!midoriya izuku x bad villain!reader

warnings: 18+, nsfw, smut, manga spoilers, pro hero!au, villain!reader, ofa usage for sex lol, size difference, manhandling, public sex, slight degradation and praise, deku eats his cum outta ya pussy, big dick deku, corruption but make it opposite, deku is a pervert change my mind

word count: 12,715

a/n: well, yall already knew I wanted to make this fic a reality, so here it is for bnharems villain collab!! check out all the already amazing stories if you haven’t already. thank you to kara, sky, and jo for reading this for me because lmao im ass rn. I’m gonna go to bed because I partied a bit too hard last night.

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your quirk: distortion – can make afflicted persons vision shift 6 cm to the left or right at the cost of having their own vision shift the same way

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“Breaking news: We have yet another report to add to the slew of attacks this month, this comes just days after we broadcasted rumors of a villain running rampant over the city. This spate of attacks has put the entire metropolitan area at a standstill, road closures, and damaged property making it difficult for commuters to get to work in the morning.

“Road maintenance endeavors to do its best to keep the city running, but it seems futile when these attacks continue to increase. The entire city was brought to a standstill by the mysterious villain who has still not been named, but reports show they are nothing like we have ever experienced before.

“Where are the heroes now? Who will save us from the terror overwhelming our city?

“Every day the crime toll continues to rise and we have no one here to protect us. The Hero Public Safety Commission assured us earlier in the week that the crime rate would go down, that the top Heroes are out there protecting our city, but if so, where are they? Is it really safe to go out anymore, who can we trust? Would you put your life in the hands of a Hero today? When they have proved our streets are no longer safe. We still have no information on what is going on, or who is involved, but we must remain observant. We will continue to report the latest news as we receive it, but for now, we must implore you to heed the warnings of the city-wide curfew that is soon to be implemented. If anyone has any information on these occurrences in the city, please send them to us or contact the police, you can remain anonymous. The safety of our citizens is what is most important, stay vigilant and don’t go out unless it is absolutely necessary. One thing we know for sure: we can no longer rely on Heroes to protect us. The streets of our once-great city are no longer safe, we are no longer safe.”

The female reporter closes her eyes, despite still being on the air, her eyebrows furrowed as she exasperatedly sighs.

“Was that good enough, Mirage?”

You look at her with a pout, your eyes then clenching shut as your lips move with unsaid words as you motion for the cameras to stop rolling. You tilt your head right and left, muttering a bit.

“Did that seem better to you this time? I don’t know, I don’t think it was scary enough...”

You open your eyes to see the exasperated reporter looking at you as if she personally sought to end you right where you were sitting.

“You are the worst villain I’ve ever encountered,” she deadpans, and you laugh in agreement.

You weren’t really a villain.

If you must put a label on what you were, you would say that you were the best PR head any hero agency could ask for. You were, after all, the top student graduate from UA’s Business Course and had been ushered into a condensed agency the moment you were finished taking your graduation pictures.

And well, if you are actually curious about the… villainy, you would like to uphold and continue to stress that you weren’t a villain! You were just a public nuisance – like those stupid YouTubers – with the ability to garner Pro Heroes’ attention! People had no reason to scoff at what you did on the daily.

You took both of these jobs very seriously!

It was like being straight out of a comic for you!

A simple – hopefully should the heroes you’re in charge of not be stupid – nine to five job by day, and a badass, crime-committing, sexy as shit villain by night! How could anyone ever hate you for your lifestyle! How could anyone ever hate you?!

But we are all noisy people, and everyone wondered just why you became a villain because you had a beautifully stable job with an impressive salary! Why would such an amazing woman such as yourself dabble in the evilness of humanity?

Well, you did have an answer for the public.

“Why do you engage in evil, villainous schemes?” the reporter deadpans, absolutely and utterly not being paid enough to humor you in this forced interview.

The public loved drama, pizazz, a little showmanship even from what they deemed humanities worst! So, you told the world why you chose to be evil instead of good:

“Because I want to be!” you grin, flashing a pose as you make your away from the interviewer you had very much illegally forced to interview you. “And because a hero killed my cat!’

Of course, that was a lie! Why would you ever hand over the real reason as to why you decided to become a villain! You’d be laughed right out of Japan, possibly be murdered by a horde of fangirls!

For you see, there was one reason and one reason alone as to why you decided to take your place within the villainy hall of fame. Why you chose to do more in your day outside of your already demanding job.

And that one reason was: Pro Hero Deku, civilian name Midoriya Izuku.

Now, trying not to come off as some creepy, weirdo, stalker fangirl, you could fully admit that you were in love with the stupidly large hunk of a man that debuted as an official pro a year before you graduated from high school.

You remember how the world was finally recovering from the year-long nightmare that had ensued. To be honest, you were stupidly surprised you had even managed to graduate, given that most of schooling had become somewhat of a joke.

FIVE YEARS AGO, MARCH, 2XXX:

It had been in the evening, the clear blue sky becoming ruby red and blood orange as you made your way out of campus. The air somehow smelled of sweet hay and gasoline, but you didn’t mind. There was hardly anyone out at this time, most students had made their way home already, and the only sounds were the moving cars of businessmen just trying to get back home.

There really wasn’t any reason to suspect anything to go wrong, this was a simple daily walk back home after school that wasn’t like any other. But then there had been a loud pop, an ever louder screech, and finally, you managed to whip your head in time to see a car tumbling through the air straight at you.

There was hardly any time to think, even less to react, and the only thing you knew was that you were not going to survive.

You braced yourself, eyes clenching and body curling, your mind screaming because this was not going to be the way things ended. But before it could happen, before the car could come down upon you and squish you like a bug under a shoe, something picked you up and you were weightless.

Waiting for an impact that never came, the tears that were endlessly streaming down your face were suddenly stopped by rough, warm fingers smoothly wiping them away.

“Hey, it’s okay! You’re safe now!” a voice says softly to you, endearingly warm and comforting. “I’m here, don’t worry.”

“Am I… did I die?” you whisper, unsure if you even want the answer, your eyes remaining closed because you refused to open them up to some angel that could confirm your death. “God, what an embarrassing way to die!”

“Oh – um, no! You’re not dead! I promise!” the voice laughs brightly, just softly enough that you believe him and not be entirely horrified by the amused reaction. Your eyes crack open slowly, just barely peering back into the world, still half praying you weren’t dead. But all you saw was green.

Green eyes, green hair, green clothes.

You blink, once, twice, realizing only then you were staring into the eyes of a boy about your age.

He had curly hair, freckles littering his face, and eyes that easily pierced through your very soul.

Without meaning to, your breath stopped, frozen in your lungs as you were captivated by a handsome man with a curving, beautiful smile.

“See, I told you it was okay!” he teased you, head cocking to the side as he grinned largely.

The action itself seemed to strangle the strangest noise out of your mouth as you realized suddenly and immediately that your face was burning and all you could think was:

A cute hero rescued me, a cute hero rescued me, a cute hero rescued me, acuteherorescuedme!

“Sorry about that scare! I would’ve caught that car sooner, but I wasn’t paying attention to who was around!” the green boy apologized, bowing deeply in front of you in his apology. “There’s a commotion just up ahead, so I recommend you take the next road over.”

You nod numbly, unable to conjure even the slightest hint of your voice again as he stood up to his full length. He was average in height it seemed, taller than you, but still not towering. The hero looked behind his shoulder, those big green eyes focusing onto the distance, onto something you couldn’t even begin to imagine – or see, really. He blinked and turned back to you, smile gone but the gentle aura to him remained, but now his face, his mouth, was underlined with a sense of urgency and engagement to whatever sent a vehicle tumbling your way.

“Which train do you take home?” he asked, eyebrows relaxing from his stern position, as his smile picked up again. “I’ll take you closer to your station!”

“B train,” you manage to wheeze out – unable to be the reason why he was held up but also confused as to just what he could do to get you closer to the station that was at least a mile away from here.

“Perfect! I know where that is!” he laughs for just a moment, and before you could even ask if this was going to be some escorted thing – because you definitely did not need it – his arms were fastly secured around you, and suddenly you were weightless.

A cold wind rushed against your face, nipping at your nose, cheeks, and ears, sending your hair flying around – into your mouth! Oh, you were screaming! You were soaring through the skyline, being held by some hero you couldn’t name, and you were screeching at the top of your lungs.

Making the mistake of looking down, your arms were suddenly around his shoulders, your voice growing even sharper and louder as you squeezed against his body and refused to let go. His hands, despite the gloves, were warm on your back, and his soft chuckle warming you from nose to toes as he secured his grip on you.

“I got you,” he spoke, “I won’t let you go, I promise.”

Those words don’t exactly ease you, but there’s a comfort to the genuinity to his words. You nod nonetheless, your face buried deep into his neck. The cold wind continues to whip around you, the only thing sounding in your ears is the cruel whipping wind and quiet city below.

“I’m landing now,” he informed you, body shifting in the wind, and reflexively, you clung even tighter to him, expecting the similar stomach dropping motion of a roller coaster going straight down. “You’re – ack – c-choking me!”

The knowledge of that, hearing the strain and entirely unhidden sound of him choking against the current chokehold you had on him, you released him entirely with a shriek of your own. Was it a smart move? No, definitely not because you were how many hundreds – if not thousands – of feet in the air with a quirk that could not, and would not save you.

“It’s okay! I’m fine!” he quickly said, his arms shifting around your waist as you felt your body weight drop just the smallest bit. To which your focus landed to the concrete floor so far down, and you began screaming again. He panicked just a bit too. “Y-You’re okay too! We’re landing! We’re landing!”

Soon, but not soon enough, the concrete floor came underneath your feet, and you practically felt your knees buckle underneath you. The train station behind you was practically invisible, and you felt the floor come in contact with your knees, and you collapsed onto your hands and knees. You could feel the tears streaming down your face as you wheezed and panted, unable to move from your position.

“Hey, look, we made it!” he laughed gently, probably being said in hopes that you would feel better. (It did make you feel slightly better, his laugh was light and pretty to listen to.) You could feel him approaching you, iron covered red shoes appearing before your vision. Looking up, you saw that the young hero was crouching, his face holding a wobbly smile that was earnest, worried, and full of unspoken hope. “I do need to get back, but before I do, are you good enough to be left alone?”

You blinked your soaked eyelashes at him, still largely unable to say anything at the cute hero in front of you who had a few scratches on his cheek, right below his freckles.

“Y-Yeah, um,” you say, your tongue cotten and lead in your dry mouth. “I-I’ll be fine, I think.”

The green eyed hero nods, offering you a hand and assisting you to your trembling legs, “That’s good to hear!” he chirped, his wobbly smile becoming a grand, bright grin. “You were really brave! I was impressed!”

Now, you were an idiot at times, but even you could spot a stupid lie. Still, hearing it said with such honesty, as if this hero who was no taller than five foot eight truly believed it, made something bubble in your chest, and soon you found yourself laughing.

“No need to lie to me, h-hero,” you manage to speak between stammering breaths, “thank you for saving me, though. I appreciate it.”

You grin crookedly at him, and to your utter delight, he reciprocates it.

“It’s the least I can do. I’d offer to take you home but… I’m not quite finished yet,” he says, and you can only nod, the conversation obviously reaching its last strides. You watch as he floats up, his eyes looking at you, but somehow focused how many miles away from where he had brought you from. “Stay safe?”

“I’ll try my best,” you agree to his question, hands clasping before your lap. “Finish the job quick, hero?”

He grins, “I’ll try my best.”

You feel a breathless sort of laugh escape you as you watch him beginning to shoot back up, but a sort of horror shoots through you as you rush forward, running right after him, hands cupping around your mouth as you scream:

“What’s your name?!”

The blur of green in the air freezes, and you stop running as you see green eyes and freckles focusing back onto you.

“Deku! My hero name is Deku!”

You stop at the curb of the street, eyes focused on the sky as the green eyed hero named Deku grins one last time before shooting off at a speed probably much faster than when he held onto you. The wind blows around you, and you can only feel the heat sitting on your cheeks and the way you’re smiling as you stare after his figure that's long, long gone.

“Deku...” you whisper to yourself, ignorant to the world of commuters beginning to appear at the station. “Thank you.”

And thus came the very apparent and obvious day in which you fell head over heels for Pro Hero Deku.

Now some people called you a stupid fangirl, obsessive stalker, and sometimes, yeah, you were obsessive and weird about your slight infatuation with a stranger. It was strange, you knew that! But you also knew that you had practically no chances of ever being able to woe the man behind the image of Deku because Midoriya Izuku practically existed as Deku 24/7.

After you graduated from high school, you were put into the same agency that was currently holding Deku. Without tooting your own rom-com obsessed horn too much, you fully expected to walk in and be handed Deku’s file as his PR manager and be able to thank him for not only saving you all that time ago, but also eventually sweep him off his feet.

But your reputation preceded you well, probably too well, because the first day you entered the office and was handed your list of three clients to work with, neither one was for Deku. Being a PR manager for heroes was hard, a job that practically held no set hours because, unlike your typical celebrities, heroes had no type of privacy or protection. They were constantly under the spotlight, being viewed by adoring fans and scornful critics. Your job served as the first line of defense for heroes against the public, and there were some heroes that were quite hilariously easy to work for because they were genuinely good.

The older PR managers typically held the quieter, easy tempered, or less combat heavy heroes. These heroes typically never had a bad thing said about them, their job was a glorified PA job but even less because there was no expected demands from the heroes they had to take in. Unless, of course, a hero wanted to do some sort of public event they hadn’t considered.

But there were the louder, quick to temper, or the heavy combat heroes that while made you an insane amount of money, also brought you a near 120 hour work week because there was so much to do, so much to consider, so much to keep your eyes on. There was the constant slander, the people who hated the louder, quick to temper heroes because they didn’t like their attitude, completely disregarding that they had been unsafe and a liability the entire time the hero was dealing with them. The talk shows that took months to convince to allow for an interview because they heard false rumors, and so you have to practically wrestle a boa constrictor to get a measly five minute interview done. And then the combat-heavy heroes… no one would ever shut up about building damages and how this hero broke his nose while he was stealing a store!

Not to mention having to have every single piece of social media on your phone, set to notify you whenever your clients names were brought up so that you could look at it. You’ve seen more than enough lewd drawings of your clients to last you a lifetime, enough fanfiction, and fan edits that left you with blazing cheeks and the need to never look at your client ever again. But mostly you checked each and every update because you were their first and only line of legal defense on these sorts of things.

You’ve taken down leaked nudes, fake news, and qualmed rumors and speculations.

It was hard.

So when you were shown to your desk on your first day and three files were handed to you, you were shocked to see the hero names you would be working with.

Dynamight

Phantom Thief

Shouto

Somehow, without having yet to speak with a single one of your now current clients, you knew that you were going to have your work cut out for you.

“Good luck newbie!” the woman who gave you the initial tour chirped, clapping you on the back. “You got this!”

Good lord.

Without much to do other than reading through the three’s files, you realized that you already knew a bunch about two of three of your clients. DynaMight and Shouto were two heroes that you knew teamed up with and hung out with Deku a lot, both on-field and off-field if any of the out of costume pictures said anything. Because of their connection with Deku, you had at one point learned a bit about them.

You knew that Shouto was a crowd favorite. He was tall and sweet and a complete airhead at the best moments despite him being smart. Controversy still surrounded his character, despite all the good he did, because of the past history that was brought out about his father Endeavor and his brother Dabi. The country couldn’t figure out where they stood in terms of that reveal. Endeavor did a lot before the reveal, and continued to rise up to everything in his path despite the skeletons in his closet being thrown out for the world to see. They neither forgave him, nor hated him, they only watched and waited. Then Dabi, of course, was seen as a could-have-been version of Shouto, and many tried to ask if he was really a hero and not actually siding with the League. After all, why on Earth would he be defensive of his father too?

The public had an unmoving image of Shouto based on anything but who he was as an individual, and you decided immediately that it would be your job to fix that. He was also, after all, a dear friend of Deku, so you’d do anything.

Phantom Thief was your easiest of the three clients. A relatively well mannered man who was kind and a bit weird in a fun way. He had a great sense of self and was a reliable person on the field. He made a great hero, but you could see the way his spirit blazed with an unspoken rivalry between him and the other two of your clients. Well, it seemed like he was the best until his former self appointed rivals came into the picture, but that was hardly ever, and according to Shouto, he was way worse back in their first year.

The greatest scandal he’s had so far in your three years of working at their agency was the one time he was lied to about a quirk and accidentally copied a woman's quirk that gave her the ability to change her cup size. Safe to say that Phantom Thief accidentally broke a few buttons on his shirt and was unable to stop civilians from snapping pictures.

But of course, the one that had you practically crying yourself to sleep nightly for more than one reason was Dynamight.

You’d known about him the moment you looked up Deku on your phone.

They were practically a hero duo in everything but name. They were always seen doing the same things together, whether that be on patrol together or maybe getting dinner, most of their top recorded fights were done with each other by their sides. You had also learned that they were childhood friends, and you practically vibrated at the thought that even though Deku was not your client, the chances of meeting him were still astronomically high.

There was no way you wouldn’t not meet Deku!

But you were wrong, so very, very wrong.

Turns out the hero duo in everything but name meant that Dynamight refused to let Deku be anywhere near him in the agency – the very small amount of time they spent in here. The few times they were in the same room, Dynamight absolutely refused to be interrupted because that was their paperwork hour. You had only ever been blessed with seeing green curls turning the corner as Dynamight gripped your forearm, refusing to let you follow.

“Like hell I’ll let you distract the shitnerd,” he stated simply, his red eyes narrowed as he stared down his nose at you. You opened your mouth, ready to defend your not so innocent intentions. “I’m not stupid, so don’t pretend like you won’t try anything.”

Your jaw snapped shut.

Safe to say that you couldn’t do anything about Deku so long as Dynamight was around.

But Dynamight as a client was exhausting to put it kindly.

There were so many opinions and thoughts and issues and praises coming from everywhere. Hell, even the fucking Americans and westerners had caught wind of the Wonder Duo at one point and while you were well knowledgable on their opinions on Deku, the ones on Dynamight were the ones that you had to focus on now.

People still called him a villain, so many unhappy with the fact that he still screamed and cursed and threatened. There were many conspiracy theories that he was working with the long dead League of Villains. They turned their nose up at the fact that he was childhood friends with Deku, claiming that no way an asshole like him could have ever been friends with him. And of course the bullying revelation that had come out shortly after your debut.

That had been a trip, one that had you even shocked as Dynamight approached the table in front of the media, his body calm and composed. You had watched as he simply said he owed nothing to the media, that he had already done all that he could to deserve his atonement and deserve Deku’s forgiveness. He had spoken clearly, concisely that it wasn’t any of their damn business as to what he did, and if he apologized to them, the unaffected, the ones that had nothing to do with his early years of bullying Deku, of his previous weakness and insecurity, it would be a waste of his breath.

It isn’t to them he should ever be apologizing to anyways.

You had watched as he stood up, face calm, and hands shoved into his pockets as he stood and walked away despite the screaming reporters. You had wanted to stay longer, have your own hand in damage control, but a swoop of green came in and Deku was at the microphone eyebrows furrowed as he pointed a finger at them all and said that his past with Kacchan was between him and Kacchan only, and his decision to forgive Kacchan were his and only his.

You didn’t hear the rest, didn’t even get the option to hear the way the hero you loved defended the hero you worked for – his childhood friend.

No.

Dynamight had grabbed your elbow and dragged you out of the room with him, the metal doors clanging closed the moment fierce green eyes met yours.

You watched in the company car as Dynamight looked outside the window, one elbow on the doorframe holding his chin; his gaze focused sharply on nothing but the passing sidewalk. Had it not been for the way the hand on top of his lap trembled, you would have thought he was perfectly okay.

Neither one of you talked about that again.

But just because you didn’t talk about it again, didn’t mean the world was the same. People claimed he brainwashed Deku, others demanded that Deku beat the shit out of Dynamight. You knew that Dynamight would want nothing to do with this, but you would stay in the office (an almost useless, empty office as most PR managers did their business at home) for hours long after you were supposed to be gone, practically arguing with someone who only existed behind a screen and didn’t even care that much – but you couldn’t stop.

Seeing Dynamight’s shaking hand had really done a number on you.

“The hell are you still doing here, eyelashes,” Dynamite asked from the dark entrance of the floor. “Go home already, don’t waste your time.”

You had startled at the initial intrusion, but you immediately relaxed seeing the smudged paint around red eyes and blond hair. You barely kept your gaze on him before turning back to your computer and continuing your argument.

“I’m not wasting my time, I’m doing my job,” you remark, eyes squinting at your keyboard because your vision is definitely blurry. “I’ll be heading out soon anyways.”

“God you’re fucking annoying and stubborn!” Dynamight barked, the heel of his hand slamming into his forehead. “This is exactly why I won’t introduce you to the fucking nerd!”

“What?!” you shriek, suddenly looking at your client as if he had personally attacked you – and in a way he did. “What do you mean you won’t introduce me to Deku because of that?! I’ve already met Red Riot, Chargebolt, Cellophane, and Pinky through you!”

“Yeah, because they’re not stubborn idiots too!” Dynamight accuses, jamming a gloved finger at you as he begins stomping your way. You startle, your chair shooting backward as the explosion hero makes his way towards you at alarming speed.

“What are you—?!” you shriek, hands flailing about as he grabs you by the collar of your distressed shirt.

Dynamight lifts you up to your feet as if you were a sack of flour and you grasp onto his forearm.

“I might tell you that you’re the most annoying and stubborn bitch in the world, but you’re not worse than fucking Deku,” Dynamight sneers, his red eyes narrowed and stern. “I’m not going to let you meet him until you learn how to give or you’ll hurt him, and I’m not going to be part of any reason as to why he gets hurt again.”

Your jaw dropped, clearly offended, but you closed it just as fast; the weight of his words made you a bit sad, even for just a bit.

“You’re kinda cute when you care for Deku, you sure I’m his biggest fan?” you tease, grinning at the hero to which he rolls his eyes.

“Shut the hell up and go home already; it’s annoying seeing you fight a losing battle that’s none of your damn business,” Dynamight simply said, putting you back onto your feet and blocking out your desk.

“I’ll go home on the condition that for my birthday you at least consider introducing us!” you say, unwilling to move from your spot. “I’ve been working for you for three years! You’ve kept me away for three years!”

Dynamight’s stare didn’t even shift the slightest millimeter, his red eyes unamused as you groaned in grief and annoyance.

“I’m stubborn? Have you met yourself?!” you grumble snatching your jacket and purse from the hook on your cubicle and shoving them on. “My names God of Explosion Murder: Dynamight and I am Stubborn™ but will never admit it.”

You continued mocking your long time client and most definitely friend if you dared to say so, and dragged the heel of your foot all the way to the elevator to which you were joined by Dynamight. The trip down the elevator is silent, and you keep your gaze locked on the closed doors, unwilling to even look at the hero next to you.

Soon enough, the elevator reached the ground floor, and you got ready to walk out.

“I’ll consider it,” Dynamight said as the elevator doors opened. “Also, fucking stop calling me Dynamight, Bakugou’s fine.”

He walked off the elevator with his hands shoved into the pockets of his pants.

“Thank you, Bakugou!” you shriek, your lungs failing you at the thought of finally being introduced to Deku! You hadn’t moved from your spot from the elevator, your chest hammering with the thought of getting to meet Deku.

“Don’t get your hopes up, you’re still irritatingly stubborn,” Bakugou merely calls over his shoulder before lifting his hand in a halfhearted wave before stepping out of the glass door.

That brought you back to reality just a bit and you scowled, knowing you would have to go beyond and above to prove that.

But you see, there were many reasons to cry about having Bakugou as your client. Besides the stinkhole of his previous bullying, people just were not understanding his typically prickly exterior. You had to go head to head with reputation tarnished, had to slap fangirls away who demanded that Bakugou degrade them where they stood. It was hard to not be stubborn as not only his PR manager but his friend, and in less than a month, still plenty of time before your birthday, you had already grown irritated of the meeting-Deku-card he waved over your head.

“Mei, if I have to go any longer than this, I will die and hope I am reborn as Deku’s new guardian angel,” you pouted, chin pressed against a cold metal tabletop. Your hands being used as glove models for one of your best friends Hatsume Mei. “It’s first of all impossible getting anywhere near him with his guard dog Bakugou literally stopping me whenever I’m within a ten foot radius! And then I’m not even sure what will happen when we do meet again! Would I even be able to talk to him?!”

“Why wouldn’t you? You talk to all my babies with me! There’s practically nothing you can’t do,” Mei laughs, smacking you against your back before returning her intense gaze back to the gloves. “Deku’s uh… I actually can’t remember him but I’m sure he’s a great conversationalist! I think he helped me with the Sports Festival my first year.”

“That was Iida,” you laugh, wiggling your fingers as Mei demanded. “You’re so bad with names and faces, I’m impressed you know mine.”

“You saved my baby, of course I remember you,” Mei turned her grin towards you, “but come on, why can’t you get with him besides this Bakugou guy?”

“Well, he’s just like Bakugou! He’s practically married to his job! Their schedules basically match together perfectly! There’s literally only three hours a day while they’re on the job that they’re not together! And that’s when they patrol their own parts of town because there’s hardly any activity they don’t need to be attached by the neck.” You explain and rant, your cheeks puffing as you stand up and allow Mei to run further tests on the glove.

“Sounds like you gotta become a villain to woo this hero guy, huh,” Mei spoke, eyes focused on the glove as you pointed a finger at the far wall and watched as a beam exploded from the fingertip and pierced through the steel wall like butter. “Too bad you’re a goody two-shoes or else I could make you some serious villain gear and make you a fearsome villain to then prove that Hatusme Mei’s babies and creations are untouchable and the best in the world! Muah-ha-ha-ha!”

You know her words are more joking than serious, but that doesn’t stop your eyes from widening. Your body shifts over to where she was standing and you screech pointing at her and just narrowly missing setting off the laser again.

“THAT'S IT!”

“What’s it?” she asked, completely confused.

“You have to make me a villain!” you exclaim, rushing over to Mei, who is eagerly waiting for her babies returnal especially since it ran perfectly. “You have to make me near-invisible gear that can keep me going toe to toe with Deku until I can seduce him!”

“You want to turn evil?” Mei questions, finger pressing quizzically to her chin. “That doesn’t seem right.”

“I am definitely not villainous to pull that off, but like I pretend to be a villain so that he talks to me and we can like get to know each other!” you exclaim, you’re unable to keep from hopping up and down on your feet, your grin unfathomably bright. “It's practically a romcom in the making!”

“I don’t know if that’s a good idea,” Mei laughs, altering the band of fabric around your waist. “You do know heroes and villains hardly speak? It’s more like… ‘I’m more powerful,’ ‘No me!,’ ‘No, ME!’”

“Um, I’m pretty sure that’s not true, but whatever! I’ll figure out a way!” you continue on unaffected because this plan was genius! Especially if you had Mei in your corner?! Her recent development of not using such… steampunk designs made her creations elusive and dangerous to own. Hence why she was an extremely sought out manufacturer, by villains and heroes alike. “And if I can go toe to toe with Deku of all people, you’ll know that you and your babies are the undeniable best!”

“Hm, that is promising,” Mei agrees with a nod as she forces you around. “Is this Deku guy all that good?”

“He’s the one you made the iron soles for!” you chirp and watch as the recognition and challenge spark immediately in Mei’s yellow eyes.

“Oh,” Mei chuckles, turning away from you and looking at her pile of made babies. “This would be good.”

“So we have an agreement?” you grin excitedly.

“Give me a month, and we’ll have your debut!”

Fuck Bakugou for thinking you weren’t good enough!

You hadn’t expected the initial phases of villainy to be quite as hard as it was, if you were being honest. The late nights at Mei’s personal lab made sure to keep your plans a solid secret, but you had to prepare for the wild range of what Deku’s quirk entailed.

There was smoke, something you were already used to working in because of Bakugou and his quirk. You’ve navigated quite a bit in his smog, and as long as you knew where you were, you would be fine.

There was also that danger sense, which allowed him to know when things were coming – something that shouldn’t be too big an issue considering you weren’t actually attempting to extract danger onto him.

Blackwhip was a big issue. How far or how much could you do if he even grabbed a hold of you. With sleuthing and the help of Mei having files on everyone's quirks, you were able to find information that blackwhip was a creation made of energy. Meaning that Mei was now making some type of destructing material to lessen the energy of the quirk, allowing for you to escape should he attempt to capture you this way.

Float was stopped by having most of your fights occur within a confined area, which was needed for you anyways! You didn’t need to be caught by anyone else but him! You didn’t actually need to land in jail – you would prefer to not be handled by anyone but Deku, actually.

Then of course the stupid superstrength and superspeed, both of which you knew you could handle with your quirk. You’ve been head to head with people with quirks similar to that before, and you knew your quirk was tricky enough that you’d manage to slip right past his fingers just fine. After all, you knew full and well that the Deku who took down S class villains was worlds quicker than F class villains – aka you.

You would be fine.

But today was day one, first of how many days it would take to get Pro Hero Deku, aka Midoriya Izuku to fall in love with you.

You were dressed in a black and purple bodysuit that was definitely not inspired by Shego from Kim Possible’s costume. Your hair was dyed purple by a special spray Mei created that would be washed out by the end of the day, but wouldn’t ever give away that it was fake. You wore a mask over your eyes, and grinned seeing that you couldn’t see a fleck of color on your irises.

Perfect.

And with far too much confidence, nauseating excitement, and unjustified attitude, you marched down towards your first spot, ready and adopting the identity of who you were about to become.

Mirage.

It was time to act. Deku and Dynamight were on different patrol routes right now, and you sent your threat, readying for the moment for the man in green to come in with the desire to stop you. With the very real threat of stealing every puppy within the tristate area being broadcasted within the area unless and hero bests you, you waited for your savior to come and stop you.

“I am here to stop your villainous acts, you villain!” a voice shattered the silence just as it shattered your heart. You looked over your shoulder to see some hero you couldn’t name standing at the other stairwell entrance with his fists clenched and ready to fight.

You groaned, shoulders crumbling with your well hidden disappointment.

“I wasn’t looking for you!” you exclaimed, pointing an accusatory finger at the flabbergasted hero who was just trying to figure out what was happening. “Where’s Deku?!”

“He’s – he’s not here yet,” he stammers, eyes wide. “It’s not his day anymore to patrol this area?”

“Aw fuck!” you complain, pouting at the realization that you had messed up. “Okay, I’ll be back later, please don’t come back. Bye!”

With a small wave, you easily stepped through the door to the stairwell next to you and left, your threat empty and the hero victorious despite not actually stopping you. And unfortunately, although you had wished and prayed even, this was not the last time a screw up like this would happen.

At the threat of destroying all the cats in the area, you had another hero show up, not Deku, and you groaned and left before they could even finish their call of stopping you.

You then threatened to poison the watering system, to which you found out that Deku was held up at another major villain threat in a different city. You groaned and stomped off after that.

Then there was the time you swore you would increase the overall temperature of the city per one degree celsius should your demands not be made. Shouto answered that one and you immediately walked away the moment you saw the familiar head of red and white coming your way.

Time and time again you kept being caught by heroes you could not care about, being confronted by no names and nobodies. It was tiring, and Mei was beginning to sigh just the smallest bit whenever you showed up to try yet again.

But you weren’t a quitter!

You would win!

This was your last attempt at getting Deku to notice you.

After threatening to wrap all the citizens in the area with a giant froot by the foot, you were almost sad to say that the heroes ignored your cry for chaos and no one had come to check on you.

You sat outside the building you used as your trap for Deku, pouting into a hot dog that the neighborhood's grandma gave you because you looked like you needed something to eat. It’s a good thing you weren’t actually a villain or else they’d be fucked, you bitterly thought as you took another bite of your food.

It had been a month of empty, no Deku appearances, and you were going to bite the bullet and pretend to be not stubborn just so stupid Bakugou of all people could introduce you.

You kicked your feet as you sat on the staircase, humming as you watched the empty streets bend with the wind. It was quiet, beautiful, peaceful.

“YOU!” a voice shrieked to your left, and you watched a pudgy, red nosed man racing over towards you, a flash drive clenched in his hands. “TAKE THIS! RUN! DON’T LET THE HEROES TAKE IT!”

You gawked at him, feeling the small plastic device being shoved into your hands as the man collapsed at your feet. You squeaked when you heard a voice yelling stop and you bounced to your feet, turned into the building and raced in.

Your breathing was erratic, heart in your throat as you raced up the stairwell, unable to begin to imagine what the hell the information on the flash drive held. You were practically hyperventilating as you reached the floor you had come to know extremely well, and you stood near the window with shaky hands and legs.

What did you take?!

“I’m going to need that back, I’m afraid,” a low smooth voice said from behind you, and you froze immediately. Old anxiety overcome by a new anxiety, one that made your stomach flip and blood burn.

Turning around, you felt awestruck to see the one man you’ve been waiting for… for fucking years now, really, to appear before you, finally be there. In the flesh, completely, entirely. Your jaw dropped, your gaze looking down from your clenched hand that held the USB to the way that Deku looked at you with warm eyes that were underlined with steel that made you want to drop to your knees, confess everything, and beg to be his. God, he was so fucking tall. He had only been about five foot eight the last time you had actually talked, and now he was at least a foot taller. His teenager haircut was long gone, now replaced with his curls trimmed at the nape of his neck before filling out on top – not quite an undercut. He had more freckles now, surely. His skin just a bit tanner, a scar trailing from his cheek to his jaw. You knew there were more scars, just as you knew that there were dimples when he smiled.

You wanted to have him between your legs while you begged for mercy, holy shit.

Tucking the USB into your pocket, you tilted your head as you will yourself to relax.

“I went through all the trouble of getting it... I think if I’m going to hand it over quickly, I deserve to know what’s on it, no?” you tease, your confidence coming out of nowhere while a smile spreads ever so largely over your features. Deku’s eyes widened just a bit, shock overcoming his green eyes.

“I’m sorry, but that’s confidential,” Deku stresses, taking a step forward toward you. You click your tongue, taking a step backward while grinning.

“I don’t think that’s what I asked for,” you giggle as you watch Deku’s face go through an array of emotions before settling onto one – curiosity.

“What do you want?” he asked, apparently entirely ready to discuss any and all terms and conditions with you.

“Honestly?” you reply, tapping a gloved finger to your chin as you ‘think.’ Deku, however, nods. His stance relaxing, becoming one of preparedness but not the takedown he had previously entered with.

“A date with you.”

You watch as Deku’s eyes slam wide open, his jaw dropping immediately and he stammered. Oh, how your heart soared and how you felt giddy and wonderful as he seemed to slip and slide on his own tongue!

“A-A date?!” he ends up almost shrieking, his head shaking left and right. “T-That’s a total lie! You can’t possibly – well, no! Please tell me the truth!”

But you were giddy, practically drunk off the fact that you were making the most powerful hero in the world blush like a little schoolboy. You suddenly were on the offensive, stepping towards your hero who was much larger than you with power and drive behind each step. And it must have been the way you stared him down, the way you walked towards him at blank range with such brimming confidence that Deku takes a step back. But it’s something that makes you want to laugh as the heel of his foot gets caught on a raised tile, and you watch the mountain of a man tumble to the floor.

You’re on top of him immediately, hands pressed to his shoulders, knee settling near his crotch with most of your weight so he got the idea to not do anything funny. The USB sits between your fingers, and you lean over his flushed face that looks up at you with wide eyes.

“Actually, I changed my mind, I know what I want,” you say instead, nose ghosting over his. “Everytime I decide to do something… naughty… I want you to be the hero on the case to stop me. You and just you.”

You lean in closer, so close that you could see the specks of gold in his green, green eyes.

Deku hasn’t spoken, and you’re pretty sure his chest isn’t moving as you press your breasts against his.

“Understood, De-ku?”

Your teeth tug at his bottom lip and let go as he nods.

“Good, good,” you grin, sitting up on his chest and taking the USB in your fingers and slipping it into his utility belt. “Take good care of that for me, I’ll see you next time, hero…”

You had only managed to flash a quick wave before disappearing through your usual door, hoping and praying to god that whatever the hell possessed you would continue until you reached Mei’s. It wouldn’t hit you until much, much later than you had stunned Pro Hero Deku speechless within the first meeting.

Hell, you thought giddily as you answered Bakugou’s call about how he probably just got into a bit of a messy situation, maybe you do have the potential to woo him like this.

Thus truly began your descent as the villain Mirage.

It was quickly accepted and discovered that the moment you stepped into that costume and colored hair that you were the prey for Deku and Deku only. Most of your interactions with Deku occurred within buildings, and you used Mei’s gear to gain the final laugh each and every time to allow for you to escape. There were times, however, where you could be seen racing through the sky. Jumping from rooftop to rooftop as Deku followed after you, leaping, tumbling, and even catching you at times.

You flirted with him heavily, allowing yourself to be caught so that you could bat your pretty lashes and press your chest against his. It didn’t matter how professional he was, how good at his job he was, Deku was a pervert – so obviously a pervert it made slipping away almost too easy.

But because you had the world-renowned, world known Pro Hero Deku as the only hero on your case, soon the small block who had to play victims to your horrendous crimes became only a small percentage of people who were watching your crimes. These near daily crimes (or inconveniences/botherings as the people on the internet say to defend you and your actions) are becoming both a worldwide sensation, and so, it took nothing for you to continue having Deku at your feet and the world chipped in. So you agreed to do interviews, forcing uneager reporters to do segments on you so that the hype behind you and Deku’s relationship grew.

You didn’t want him to leave you, not until you got what you wanted, and unless you were an idiot, you were nearly positive you were almost there.

Why would you say that?

Well, a few reasons.

The first came about a week after you had first met Deku again.

You had joyously gathered the means to create a machine to shave down an eighth of an inch of everyone's shoes in the entire country of Japan without their knowledge. You had ever so evilly explained that the point of this was to ensure that for a full day, everyone would feel off and unbalanced but would not know why.

You had said this, grinning widely as you turned around to see Deku standing there attempting to fight off a very amused smile.

“I don’t think that would be all too evil, Mirage,” he called out to you, arms folding across his chest as he watched you set up the machine to do exactly what you said you would do.

“Mm, that’s what you say now, but just wait until you’re one of the losers stumbling around,” you say back, grinning as you turn around for just a second, wagging the knife at Deku from the distance.

“Well, regardless, you know I can’t let you do that,” Deku laughs just slightly, and you grin, standing up.

“Oh, yeah?”

“Yes, so I’m going to have to ask you to stop right there.”

You giggle.

“Make me.”

You’re not sure what happens, but there’s dodging and weaving, spinning and sliding. You’re practically wheezing from how hard you’re laughing as Deku can not manage to land a finger on you with the help of Mei’s items and your quirk. It all comes to an end when instead of dodging, you throw yourself right at him, and Deku has not anticipated that.

His eyes are wide open and you fiercely grin as he falls back onto the floor, unbalanced and only slightly frantic. You have the knife pointed at his neck, the dull blade sitting gently on his skin.

“So, Deku,” you taunt teasingly, your teeth burying into your bottom lip for just a moment at the sight of the dark flash in his green, beautiful eyes. “Tell me one thing, or I’ll continue on with my vile plans.”

“O-Okay?”

“Are you single?”

The second attempt came a few many weeks later.

You had gathered about 75 tons of glitter bombs and were in the current process of making them one. You had plans of setting it off over Tokyo so that for practically the rest of eternity, the entire city would have glitter everywhere. The only thing is that you did have to glue the glitter bombs together because, well, no one made super giant ones.

“This is so annoying, there’s glitter everywhere, and I’m only ten glitter bombs in!” you complain to the ‘empty’ room but knowing full and well that Deku had appeared through the broken window at least five minutes ago.

“If it’s annoying to you, then shouldn’t you stop?” Deku replied and you grinned.

He really couldn’t stay quiet, huh?

“Well, if it’s annoying to me, then that means every one of my victims will also find it annoying. Win-win situation.” you say, turning around towards him and winking. Facing back towards the glitter bombs you scowl, “stupid fucking glue gets everywhere, too!”

“Regardless, you know I can’t let you do that,” Deku said as leveled as he could although you swore you heard a laugh in his voice.

“Just try and stop me,” you reply back stone cold.

You stand up and watch as Deku stands up from the windowsill and sighs just a bit too heavily.

“Guess I have to,” he says and shoots out before you’re well prepared.

Typically, and probably in any other situation, this would have been the end. Pro Hero Deku had come at you with the speed and power as he took out any other Class F criminals, but unfortunately for him, and definitely fortunately for you that glue was EVERYWHERE.

Deku’s hand was stuck onto your arm, and your chest was glued to his stomach, and you swear you never quite got the strawberry Deku references until right now.

The perverted hero burned scarlet, his face practically simmering with heat as your body became undeniably stuck to his. You had to fight off the vindictive smirk, the practically snarling grin as you could feel something hot and heavy twitch at your hip.

“Fuck,” Deku wheezed.

“Fuck, yeah,” you grinned.

“WHAT?!”

Deku could not look you in the eyes for about 10 more interactions following that, but you counted that as a win. But undoubtedly, your starred and favorite memory of it all was something that occurred just last week of the current present events.

You had stood on top of a building, threatening the entire government of stealing (i.e., cutting off) the aglet of their shoes and sweaters and then removing all the laces so that it would result in their wasted time and entire humiliation!

“I don’t think most people even know what aglets are, to be honest,” Deku said from behind you. You turned around to see that he was standing there with an unsuppressed grin. “It’s not a good enough threat.”

You go unfazed by his judgement, choosing to instead bat your eyelashes and push your hair behind your ear.

“Not a good enough threat, and yet, you’re still here?” you tease, enjoying the way pink flushes to his cheeks.

“Where else would I be?” he says, and you have to ignore the way your stomach fills with butterflies.

“You’re not cute when you flirt back,” you deadpan, biting your tongue harshly when he says ‘hey!’ “Enough chit chat, let me kick your ass now and then do what I need to do.”

Unlike probably what is 95% of the time, you made the first move today.

You were on the offensive, jabbing and weaving, sweeping and punching. Deku’s green eyes were nearly black as he watched you, analyzing and taking in your movements, countering them all without so much of an issue.

“I still don’t get your quirk,” Deku grunted as his hand swiped at the empty air. “Why won’t you tell me?”

“So then you can turn me in to the government who are still salty about their aglets? I don’t think so!” you say with a laugh, rolling out of the way as Deku lunges forward. “Try again, baby, I have full faith that you’ll get it.”

Deku puffed out a chuckle and lunged again, his huge gloved hand swiping at you, with nearly accuracy despite your quirk being on. But… he wasn’t exactly perfect.

RIIIIIIIIIP!

Cold air hit your breast and your jaw dropped as your very exposed breast appeared before you and Deku. Pro Hero Deku had torn the breast of your costume, the costume that you purposefully did not wear a bra for because you had wanted this exact scenario to play out.

“DEKU!” you screech, pretending to be modest and covering your tit as Deku finally yanked himself out of staring at your breast and whipped around.

“Oh my god, I am so sorry! I didn’t think that was going to happen! I didn’t even mean to look at your boob! It just sort of all happened too fast and it was very shocking! N-Not that you have an ugly boob or anything because actually I think you have a very great boob! But oh my god, I need to shut up please ignore me!” Deku spoke so fast in a matter of five seconds, and you couldn’t even tell him to come back as he sprinted away.

His ears burned red and you swore even as he was gone, you could still see the red of his ears illuminating the sky.

You laugh.

“What a perv.”

And so, we are back to the beginning.

Back to how you forced a local news channel to read your demands so that you could hopefully take your final bow as Mirage forever.

With the threat of having a machine that would make dogs bark at a frequency for hours on end until humans eardrums broke then bleed. You made your way to your typical building and hummed as you waited.

The world outside was the same as always.

There were a few people out, a few cars driving through the street, and a few birds chirping here and there.

It was peaceful.

“Don’t you think the new reporter thing was a bit dramatic?” Deku chuckled from behind you.

You were used to him approaching like that, used to him trying to portray being elusive and cool. In your opinion, it just made him dorky.

“No such thing as being dramatic when I’m trying to go head to head with the greatest hero ever,” you respond back effortlessly. You spin on your heel and look back at Deku, who is leaning against a doorframe that he most definitely is slouching on so that the top of his head doesn’t hit the frame. “Hi, Deku.”

“Hi, y/l/n,” he says with a soft smile, one that's slightly victorious, one that makes your stomach knot in a pleasant way.

“Ah, you discovered my secret identity,” you observe, grinning as you begin approaching Deku. “Should I be scared?”

“Probably not, I don’t think I could do anything to you,” Deku sighs, pushing off the door frame and walking towards you too. “You’re pretty amazing, y/l/n.”

“Let’s prove that then,” you grin while zipping forward.

As if the both of you knew that this was the end of the line, the final confrontation, the battle this time was different. It was showy, flirty, full of spins and side steps, playing a game of cat and mouse while dodging and weaving. You laughed as blackwhip dissolved around your costume, and you frowned as he began using more of his power to get from point A to point B much quicker.

You’re not quite sure how it happened, what exactly you did wrong, or maybe Deku just finally figured out the pattern you used for your quirk because suddenly you were being tackled from behind. You shrieked as the two of you went down, his body flushed on top of you, his chest pressing to your shoulders.

The both of you were heaving, panting, completely out of breath from the five minutes you took playing around. He holds your wrists in one hand, pinned above your head, and the other one is on your waist. You were trapped beneath him, unable to move the absolute unit of a man above you, arms and hips weak to his weight. You shoved your hips up, attempting to shift some of his weight off you, but you froze as he choked on a breath by your ear.

Your ass was pressed against something hard, thick, and hot.

Oh.

Ohhh fuck.

It was happening.

Holy fucking shit.

Your breathing hitches as you thrusted your ass up again, confirming you were grinding on what was definitely Deku’s hardening cock. And once again, Deku makes the prettiest, most embarrassed gravelly grunt at the back of his throat and you feel like every strand of resistance and strength snaps.

The hand on your waist pulls you even closer against his crotch, and there's lips pressing against your neck, and you absolutely lose it.

He kisses your neck sloppily, teeth nipping at your exposed flesh, and you grind against him, moaning and thrusting back as your body feels like it's on fire. He wanted you! He wanted you and your plan to woo him worked!

“I’ve wanted this for so long,” you keen breathlessly. “Wanted you so badly, Deku.”

“Fuck,” Deku curses, his hips thrusting back against your clothed ass with power you couldn’t fucking wait to feel. “I wanted you too. Wanted you so badly, but didn’t think – holy shit.”

His hand that pins your wrists lets go of you, and moves to grab your jaw. You nearly fucking melt as his full lips slam against yours, and you moan as his lips move against yours. There’s something indescribable about how he’s kissing you, the want, the need, the months of suppressed tension bursting through every move and curve of his mouth. It doesn’t matter to you that you’re pressed up against the concrete floor, you feel like you’ve been placed into another world, an area where you can never come back.

Your arm reaches behind you and buries into his soft curls, you tug at them as your ass circles against his thrusting hips. His tongue slips into your mouth, and you whine at the hot, wet muscle in your mouth, and it sends your head spinning. You can’t take it anymore, you need him, want him flushed against your front.

“Can I fuck you?” Deku asks swollen lips pulling away from yours, his mouth frantic and trailing kisses up your cheeks and down your jaw. “Please, I wanna fuck you so bad. Wanna fuck you on the floor and against the wall. Can I make you mine?”

You nod your head frantically, unable to come up with the words to say in order to tell him yes.

Deku laughs breathlessly and flips you over so that it’s your back against the floor now.

And just like you want him to, Deku comes down to reclaim your mouth. Hot, open mouthed kisses, teeth tugging at your lips and hands grabbing your waist. His hands are huge against you filling up the space between your hip and your waist without an issue. Your legs wrap around his waist, feeling entirely small underneath him, but entirely ready to be fucked by him.

His lips move expertly against yours, teeth nibbling at your lips, mouth then sucking on your tongue. You can’t keep the continuous moans from leaking out, can’t keep yourself from staying quiet as your eyes flutter open and see green eyes so dark they look black, staring down at you with the intensity of a predator.

You were his prey, and you would present to him at the drop of a hat.

His body is hot, heat rolling off of his hero costume in waves, making you feel like you were near burning against him. And the heat between his thighs sits at the bottom of your ass, thrusting up and grinding against you so that you don’t forget even for a moment that you are making him this way.

“I always knew you’d have such a pretty moan,” Deku mumbles as his fingers find the zipper to your costume and begin to tug it down. His lips trail down your neck, biting and nipping at the newly exposed flesh. “Knew you’d look so pretty under me, waiting to be fucked into submission.”

The words spark something within you, your eyes fluttering as your hips grind just a tad bit faster and you whine.

“Aw, is that what you wanted this entire time, y/l/n?” Deku asks, his grin pressed against your collarbone. “Wanted to be stretched out and fucked until you can’t anymore?”

“I want it,” you gasp, your fingers burying deep into his curls. “I want you, I want it, I want your dick in me already!”

“Not into foreplay?” Deku chuckles just a bit, tongue then tracing up your neck.

“Oh I am,” you snap, fingers finding the zipper of his own costume. “You can find out later how much I’m into it, but right now, I have been wanting you for years, and you will not make me wait any longer!”

Deku only nods frantically, and it's a mess of limbs, sloppy kisses, and clothes as the both of you strip to nothing.

Deku’s in between your legs, one hand pressed to the back of your knee, the other gripping what you believe is his dick because it makes everything in the world freeze as you see it. It’s huge, so thick that his hand wraps around it in a nice grip, and it long, curling up to his abs, curved and veiny.

“Holy shit,” you squeak, your cunt already clenching at the thought of taking that in.

“Are you ready?” Deku asks, the hand on your leg moving away for a moment as he cards his fingers back through his hair. “I don’t have a condom, though.”

“That’s fine, I don't care,” you dismiss his words, eyes too focused on the flush cock in his hand. “I don’t think I’ll live after you kill me with that anyways.”

Deku laughs just a bit, his dimples flashing as he leans in and kisses you deeply. You tremble underneath him, feeling so small pressed up against him, and you mewl when you feel the head of his cock pressing between your folds.

“Put it in,” you gasp, leg lifting and wrapping around his waist, “put it in! I want you to fuck me until I can’t walk, do you understand?!”

Deku nods, and with a sense of frantic need, his hand guides his cock into you.

It feels like you’re splitting in half. The girth of his cock stretching your walls out to the max, and he’s only going in. You scream loudly, both in pain and pleasure because it hurts so good.

“Take it, baby, take me all in,” Deku pants, his hips pushing out small, tiny thrusts to ram his cock further and further into your twitching cunt. “That’s i-it, holy fuck, that’s it! You’re taking me all the way in. F-Fuck… you’re so amazing! So fucking perfect!”

Tears are pouring out of your eyes, and your nails are tearing into his back, you sob slightly overwhelmed with his cock and the absolute pleasure of finally getting what you want and it being so much better than you thought. Your cunt throbs almost violently as Deku’s cock finally hits your cervix and your eyes roll to the back of your head as he thrusts in further, lips attempting to claim yours.

“Fuck me, Deku,” you beg, hips beginning to slam and fuck up onto his cock. “Please! I need you!”

“Such a desperate little villain though,” Deku sighs, teasingly, giving you one strong thrust for good measure. It goes a long way though, the power behind his thrust and thighs promising you a bruised ass, thighs, and cunt makes your mouth water for more. “I need you to promise to never do anything like that again and be a good little manager for Kacchan.”

“W-Wha–”

“Be good and stop being Mirage, or else you won’t be fucked.”

There was no hesitation.

“Okay.”

And just like that, Deku’s soft smile curves into a knowing, fierce smirk, and you can do nothing as his hands press to the back of your knees and he begins thrusting his hips into you. And it takes you completely out of control.

It’s a messy, frantic dance, your body holding onto his, your lips pressing against his, desperate and needy for his, and he is basically trying to imprint his body onto yours, the concrete, and the walls. Your bodies are so foreign to each other, and yet, when he fucks into you just a bit hard, just a bit faster, you come undone, back arching and toes curling as you sob his name.

It’s overwhelming to know that he can read you this well and for you to have never fucked him before. It’s empowering to see that he likes every forced and involuntary squeeze and clench of your cunt. He loved when your nails dug into his skin, raking their existence against the plane of broad muscles and scars.

Deku curses your name as you clench around him, his hands moving to your jaw so that he can lift your face to kiss him just so. He kisses you with a heated passion, a need that strips your entire being bare, and his hips slam so loudly against you, the slicked wetness is squelching and slapping with every grunt and moan.

In and out his cock goes, and you praise him and his cock.

You praise him for making you feel so good, for stretching out your pussy with that fat cock of his. You beg for more, and more, and more. You want every snap of his hips to send new colors to your vision, and every echoing squelch of your meeting, sloppy sexes only adds to the blabbering, unmanaged sentences from your lips.

“Harder, faster, more!” you beg, practically wailing against his shoulders, needing him more and more. The concrete hurts against your back, but you don’t care. You don’t care if he breaks your back, it’s a fall you’ll take. “Don’t hold back! Don’t you dare hold back!”

“Fuck, you’re crazy,” Deku gasps, his sweaty brow burying into your cheek. “I won’t though, I won't. Be ready, I’m not sure if you can take it.”

Before you can snap back that you can in fact take it, Deku’s weight falls heavier onto you and the angle shifts just slightly, and your words are ripped right out of your throat for a pitched, window shattering screech. Deku fucks into you with a new power, some untapped strength as greenspark falls from his skin as he ruins you for anyone ever again.

Your voice begins to scream out, the feeling of his vicious, thick cock snapping into you, shoving your shoulders further and further into the concrete was sending your head spinning. Your body is convulsing as he fucks you with new vulgar need and strength. But before you could scream your praises, Deku’s fingers shove into your mouth, and his other hand wraps around your neck, silencing your words and noises as he fucks up into you again and again and again.

“So loud, angel,” Deku smirks, fingers stroking and pinching your tongue as saliva pours endlessly from your mouth. His voice isn’t strained however, doesn’t have any indication that he’s out of breath or ready to tap out and that nearly makes you go insane. “I can’t wait to see everything that makes you look like this… you’re so pretty when you’re getting fucked.”

Your head is spinning, the heated tightness in your core clenching and throbbing as his conquesting cock never once stops or lessens. It just grows and grows and grows. His cock twitches in you, and your eyes roll to the back of your head as he lets out a deep moan.

“Such a good and wet cunt you are,” Deku gasps as you gag against his fingers that press roughly against the back of your tongue. Your vision feels hazy, but you feel like you’re on cloud nine as his hand on your throat opens and closes, demonstrating his power over you. “I’m so glad you went through all this hard work to get me to fuck you.”

You can’t speak, so you nod desperately, you were so happy you did this too.

Your hips buck up into him with sheer stubborn drive to get him to toss his head back and moan, you wanted to see him unhinged too. Your eyelashes flutter, as his hands remove themselves from your face, and they move to your hips to help you out. But the building tightness and demanding need in your cunt was growing louder, hotter, completely undeniable. Your teeth sinking against his skin as you whimpered loudly, absolutely pathetically as you shifted faster, fucking against him harder.

“I-I’m so close,” you manage to moan out, and a sharp escape of air comes from his nose at that revelation.

Deku nods, his head moving so that his forehead rests against yours as he looks deep into your eyes. “I need you to look at the way your belly bulges while I fuck you before you cum, I want you to watch it bulge as you cum.”

You whimper, the strain in your neck almost insufferable as you peer down at your hastily exposed stomach, and you nearly faint at the pornographic, near-insane image of your stomach bulging with his hammering monster of a cock. And just like that, the tight heat in you snaps without a hitch, and you come tumbling down from the heights of your building orgasm. White heat and light spread through your body, your jaw slacking as you moan loudly, screaming his name as you convulse against him, body entirely limp. Deku, who was barely hanging by a strand, completely loses it when your core clenches like a vice against him.

Hot, thick ropes of cum spurt from his cock, his heavy, shaking gasps the only thing you can hear as he fucks into you once, twice more for good measure he collapses onto his forearms above you. It’s hot, almost too hot as he lays on top of you, the sticky fluid of his cum radiating against your already blazing walls, and for a bit, there’s silence.

Deku is the first to move afterward, and you whine as he pulls his cock out of your sore, abused pussy. You make a noise of curiosity then fear as Deku spreads your legs even more open and moves so that his head is face to face with your cum filled pussy.

“What are you–?!” you screech as Deku takes a lick out of your dripping cunt.

“Fuck, this does taste good,” Deku smirks as he once again licks your overstimulated pussy and you sob. “Besides, who said we were done?”

bonus!

“Everyone, this is my girlfriend y/l/n y/n!” Izuku happily introduced you to his group of friends.

“What the hell?!” Bakugou screamed, thrusting a finger at you and all you did was laugh.

So much for not being stubborn, huh.

#midoriya izuku x reader #midoriya x reader #midoriya smut #bnha #bnha x reader

867 notes · View notes

breaniebree · 5 years ago

Text

A Second Chance Chapter 219

I received an amazing number of reviews on this chapter and I wanted to share them/address some of them here to show my immense appreciation for those who take the time to drop me a line or two for what I write.

Some of you have decided after this chapter you can no longer follow my story and while it saddens me, I expected it. I write first for myself and I know where I want this story to go and while I hope you all keep reading it -- I know that not everyone will continue it.

Devereaux13: I can’t. You really just did that to us? Started this story with a oh! Sirius is gonna live! But NOO u had to frick us all over. Oh my god. I love you for this story but hate you for this story. I cried more this time than the cannon one. Goddamn

Lightningscar: Huh, well, judging from the reviews, this chapter is getting you a lot of heat... personally, I though it was great in many ways, both in action, description of thoughts/feelings and great descriptions of what was going on. My biggest beef, though, gotta be this: *Ginny grabbed Luna's hand and the two of them climbed onto the wolverine's back* Ehm, it is likely it was explained in previous chapters, and if memory serves, Animagi are generally slightly larger than their natural counterparts, but... a wolverine is generally about the same size as a medium dog, shoulder height being around 30-45 cm (12-18 inches), 65–107 cm (26–42 in) long (not counting the tail). Basically, Ginny and Luna are crawling on top of a Spaniel or a Golden Retriever (on the small size) Yes, wolverines are ridiculously strong compared to their size, capable of carrying prey many times its own size... carrying dragging it. One big difference between carrying something in its powerful jaws, compared to carrying something heavy on its back. A few other minor beefs Ehm, why did Voldemort pull a Jafar on the cat (Lady G, was it?) and not outright kill it? So they got giants wandering down mid London without anyone being the wiser? I'm sure you have thought of the logistics about it :) Well, all in all, great chapter. Things have advanced rapidly compared to canon, for better (less Horcruxes) and worse (Ministry bye-bye)... though, in the latter case, it can be interpreted somewhat ambigious. Fallen as in the place (which was a given, seemed to be completely overrun suddenly... makes one wonder where all of the defence forces went, guess we will find out sooner) or if it has fallen as an orginazation like they did in canon. Curious to see what happens next. Yours sincerely, Lightningscar

Menna Taha: Ok let me just say.. Sirius was going into battle with the intent to save his son, knowing that his Fiancée who he was very much in love with was pregnant with TWINS. I mean you’d think he would be more careful than in the books where he was reckless, lonely, rusty and under house arrest in a place he hated. Also the ministry fell! Just like that! After all the preparation and the relations with the french, Bulgarian and Russian ministries AND the fae and the army they made AND the warning they recieved! What were they fucking sleeping! I love you please don’t hate me.

They were not sleeping, but they weren’t prepared like they should have been. It’s a problem that will be addressed.

HGRHfan35: Well...shit... This was a really bad idea: to read this in bed. How the blazes do you expect me to sleep, now?!

Daddy: WTF! Why end it here. WHY!

Wade Bradford: Noooooooooooooooo!

AZfangirl: i cant believe you killed sirius. this one really hurts

Ofglitterandgiggles: I’m broken

axelvaz: Started this about a week ago and I’m finally all caught up! But oh my gosh! What a cliffhanger! Sirius!

Emeralds and Rubies: I thought we might get off easy when Pettigrew fell through the veil, butI’m heartbroken for Harry and Zee, but you definitely did this whole plot point justice.

maximusrexmundi: Eeeeeehhhhh so I was with you until the very end. I just can't imagine a Voldy who is objectively in a weaker position (than in the books) being able to muster a force that could attack and defeat a FULLY prepared ministry who both knew he was coming AND had international allies

Runningtwiceasfast: I have to say I am incredibly impressed with this chapter. I am obviously sad as I was in canon when Sirius died but due to the more uplifting tone of your work overall that you would shy away from a turn like this. Sirius' death is so important in canon a it really is a turning point in the story. Obviously when Cedric died it was sad but Sirius' death made everything all the more real. Your Harry has gotten so much more of a life and childhood than canon Harry but he too is now faced with the reality of life without Sirius. I can't wait to see what happens next.

Joanne: Wow! I’m so sad. I’ve been listening to Led Zeppelin in honour of Siri. I had hoped that this part of canon would be ignored but alas. War is war. Amazing storytelling: you made us feel this loss and that takes talent. I both dread and look forward the next chapter. Will Harry take Ginny with him? Will the breakup occur? Did Remus and Tonks make it out? Will there be a funeral? So many questions! Enjoy your birthday and rest while we all grieve.

Ahugefun: I need you to undo sirius death. Im not joking He shouldnt Not with zee pregnant and harry so attached to him Its not fair to us the readers who enjoyed your story so much andddd already mourned sirius a little bit when he was kissed before you changed that.. Im hoping that you wont kill remus and tonks in the end of the war. U are your own story and if somthing happen in jkr world doesnt mean it should here!

Everything that happens in JKR’s world is what inspired me to write my story so of course it affects it. Some will be the same, some will not -- includes character death. Not everyone will die who did in canon, but some will, and some who survived in canon, will die here.

jakegarrett94: nooooooo not sirius

Leaf Ranger: ...I'm sorry...but this...this is exactly why I called fucking bullshit in the last chapter. Because of all this. This. My problem isn't the pacing of your story. My problem is all this death and carnage and bullshit happened...not because of something realistic...but because the Grey lady, for no reason, was a cryptic dumbass. That is my problem. While it'd be hard to swallow, I'd have accepted most of what happened in this chapter if there was an ACTUAL reason, in the story, as to why they weren't able to be told where the diadem was. but there wasn't. The only reason was solely because YOU wanted it that way. And it's your story, fine, but at the very least, there should be a damn good reason WHY, in the story itself, things happen the way they do. It should never...EVER be just because you, the author, want it to happen that way. because then it breaks the immersion of the reader, if something happens solely for the sake of you, the author, having it happen that way. *sighs* To be honest? I'm sorry, but this, this just is too much. You killed off Sirius and had the Ministry fall DESPITE the preparations they had already made, despite the warnings they had. That just...no. I'm sorry, but no. I'm done. Thanks for what was a pretty entertaining story up to this point, but after this? Just nope. It's not worth it. It really isn't.

Sorry to hear that, but again, it is obvious to us the readers where the diadem is, but not to them. The Grey Lady can be cryptic if she wants as she’s dead and has nothing to lose, it’s up to our heroes to find the answer. Sorry you feel it’s not worth it, thanks for reading as long as you did.

Redplayer1998: Please tell me it's a trick sirius can't be dead not after 200 chapters of building his character please no

Dutchie: Oh man Sirius died, bummer! Still a great story.

Whiton: Hey I’m a bit late but I wanted to say happy belated birthday. I love this story it’s fun it’s sad it’s thought provoking and is just a wonderful thing to read. Hope this finds you well and hope you keep writing.

AkashiyaHyrule: What the... this can't be it. What's the point of creating all that military platoons, and gathering allies-if the Ministry are just going to fall so fast? This feels waaay to early for this story plot to occur. But that's just my opinion. Hopefully you got a plan that works, and it's believable. It's also in my opinion that if Sirius Black's "death" is true (hope it's not), Zacharias should not be with anyone else or find someone else to replace him. I suspect you might do something of that nature. You haven't shy away from all the random romances that occurs, even in minor characters. Don't think I haven't notice your tendencies to ship characters! Anyways, it would be annoying, weird, not the same, awkward, and off-putting. I hope that will never happen. But then again, this your AU, so you have the final say on what you want to implement. I invested a lot of my time in this piece of fanfic, so I don't wish for it be ruined by very disagreeable choices (it's all subjective, of course). I mean no disrespect, as I know writing is a tough pastime, and you deserve to be commended for the amount of time you put into your AU. So, good luck. You deserve your break, and hopefully things will be explained Chapter 220! P.S: He's really dead, isn't he? I guess I would have to expect the death of Remus, Tonks, Fred Weasley, Colin Creevey, Lavender Brown (at least in the movies), Dumbledore, Snape, Moody, Dobby, etc, etc. P.S. Why the hell am I just naming character deaths?

Guest: There . Are . No . Words. Saz J

Guest: I, like so many other readers here, have absolutely loved the changes you have made to the story of Harry & Sirius - it has been a wonderful story that we have looked forward to reading every week. However, as much as I love your story, I am upset and disappointed that you had this last chapter play out the way it did. You have, for 218 chapters, written about great changes and strengths for Harry, all the others, and especially Sirius. To have this last chapter happen almost like the original version (book & movie) is a bit of a let-down to your earlier chapters. I will still look forward to reading your story, but maybe without the enthusiasm I have had this past year.

KittenWithAnAx: damn it! I'm crying! Why do I always hope that Sirius survive? even when I watch the movie I hope he don't die! I hate and I love you! yes A break is need! let us mourn in peace! my baby died! and I know that in two weeks I will be back! because I'm too curious and I love how you write! I will still mourning Sirius but I will be back... anyway I will go cry in the shower! have a nice two week break! (and Happy Birthday!)

Blitz90: Hello Breannie ! First of all, I wanna say that your story is awesome ! I really like many of the change that you bring to the HP world! Congrats on that ! Now, about chapter 219, nice chapter all around but I felt that the training they got change nothing but maybe because of the stress to fitgh Death Eater explain it to... maybe you can show me the light on this ? Second, the death of Sirius... I must say that I am disapointed about that. I know that you said in the beginning that it will be ultimately a Hinny story but for me, Sirius was the heart and soul of you fiction. Lets hope that he is just in shock or king of a coma !

Qarz: You put a lot of effort into this, writing so many words is nothing to sneeze at and it shows dedication. However, you don't seem to understand that actions have reactions. If you make changes in Canon then the whole story has to change to make any modicum of sense. You didn't do that and the more than 1.5m words are a waste since it led to the same place and somehow things are even worse than in said Canon. I truly pity those who read this huge story just to be disappointed.

nesciamema: Kinda disappointed by Harry's shoddy fighting since they've all been training for a while, the only one who seemed to be thinking strategically was Ginny before she was taken out. Hoping Zee doesn't miscarry and fights for the babies rights as heir to the Blacks. No way in hell should any Malfoy hold the title with what just happened.

goldenone: thank you for posting this on my birthday it was a great gift but also HOW COULD YOU IMA CRY

aj613: ohmygodohmygodohmygodohmygod I was hoping Sirius would be spared holy shit oh my god whyyy? Amazingly written as always, BUT WHY?! THEY WERE GONNA GET MARRIED AND HAVE BABIES AND HARRY CALLED HIM DAD I—

Rufus777: I understand why you had to kill Sirius. But it still makes me sad. Well written as always. I've been a fan since chapter one. I had forgotten about the Dursley stuff. Good on you to remind everyone of those memories. Keep up the awesome -rufus

kyle.grimm90: I am so sad that Sirius died again... I was really hoping he would survive this time. I love you story is so addictive but I wish that would have gone different. I was so excited he didn’t go through the veil I was jumping for joy and then wammm he died. I won’t stop reading but it killed me when he died.

Haillie: WHAT! OH COME ON!

yunkol76: HAPPY BIRTHDAY! Thanks for the present! Now time to enjoy another GREAT chapter

coloredwords: First things first. A very happy birthday to you. I hope you have (had) a wonderful day. Second I wish you no riot reviews for your birthday. As much as I want to know what happens next, I respect you too much to shout and riot. But what a chapter! Damn. When Peter fell through the curtain I thought for a second Sirius would be safe. But alas. My last hope lies within some time turner or time room miracle. And all of a sudden we skipped right to the beginning of DH. I'm so curious to see what happens next. Have fun writing and enjoy your two weeks off. I will be here, waiting patiently.

Fruitcake49: I would rather this entire chapter be a nightmare. Why do Sirius and Harry always get the short dirty end of the stick? Such terrible childhoods and Sirius has to die leaving Harry alone. I gotta tell you if anyone other than a character in a story were put under this much pain and unhappiness they would crack and cease to function. As much as I like this story, Harry needs Sirius. I'm tired of people killing him off.

Steelcode: NO NO NO NO NO! HE WAS GOING TO GET MARRIED...HE HAS KIDS! WHAT ABOUT HARRY'S KIDS! WHAT ABOUT SIRIUS' FUTURE! PLEASE TELL ME THIS IS ANOTHER JOKE PLEASE!

X.pix.X: Happy birthday, and great chapter

Undead Gothic Princess: you are mean and a god all at once! I was on the edge of my seat the whole time reading this, then took a sigh of relief when pettigrew died cuz I thought "hey, Sirius will be fine now, he survived!" then wham! I dont think he's really dead dead though. they'll either be a way so that it was polyjuice or maybe they use a time turner. something better happen so that he just appears through the front door/hospital wing and is like "whys everyone so down when my hansome face is here?!" please let it be true, otherwise I dont think I can go on in this cruel world xxx

HarryPotterLover2422: Such an amazing chapter! I have enjoyed reading this story for quite some time now and look forward to each new chapter. I am so sad with what happened to Sirius, but I am looking forward to what’s to come! I loved the Lucius called Theo his son that was amazing! I think one of my favorite things about this story, other than how amazing it is, is how you humanize especially the Malfoy family in terms of Draco and Theo. Amazing as always! Happy belated birthday! Can’t wait for more! ️

Leo: Happy Birthday! I was so excited to see that you have written this chapter, until I read it, I can't believe you've hit us with the double whammy. This chapter both made me cry and amazed at your incredible writing skills. I hope you carry on and finish this story. However, most importantly, please, please please, please, puppy eyes please can you post the chapter. I know you said you won't but imagine puppy eyes, you know you can't say no to that. Keep us the brilliant work.

I am imagining puppy eyes, but no, I’m sorry.

GoldenPotterFan: Chapter 219 and the first time I am commenting. Started reading this story between Christmas and New Year 2018 and read all chapters up to then by the time I went back to work. Since then I have waited for updates every week. Somehow, I don't believe that Sirius is dead. Just a feeling I have. I also think Lucius might be working against Voldemort while still not quite working for the Order. I would not be surprised if he saves Sirius somehow. I cannot wait for another update. PS Happy Birthday, I hope you had a great day :)

devonleney27: HAPPY BELATED BIRTHDAY! Thank you for the gift of this chapter, sorry I didnt get you anything!

DoodleBug78: OMFG cannot believe that! Really?!

witchyromy: mmmm i would have thought that with the time living in the magical world, and all the extra training harry has done, with sirius and remus and mischa and the rest of the group as well in the extra defense lessons that this would have gone better, they almost only used stupify and some 1st year spells. The whole thing is 80% the same as the original... i have to say i am a bit disappointed.

Sorry to hear that, but I kept what I needed to keep in there for a reason and I hope you will stick around to see that, but if not, well thanks for reading.

Guest: Welp, I’m crying. I’ve been following this story for a while, and honestly didn’t expect to be so upset about Sirius’ death, again. You’ve done wonderful work at recreating this moment. There are so many tiny complexities in this rendition and I can’t wait to see what comes next. Hoping zee’s fall didn’t hurt those babies. Thank you for your work. ️

snowball0709: Happy birthday! Hope you have a great day:) Now to the story.. HOW COULD YOU KILL SIRIUS? This story is all about his second chance! And the wedding, the twins... come on, siriusly! I really hope you have something up your sleeve and that he miraculously lives somehow. Can't wait to read the next chapter!

Lolikiano: I'm so excited you posted early! I can live with the cliffhanger as an exchange! Your stories have inspired me to write my own fanfiction and I can't thank you enough for that! I'm looking forward to your next update in two weeks! P.S. I love the "Surprise" pregnancy (which i TOTALLY called when Zee got ill!) I can't wait to read Harry's reaction!

Maggie1874: I'm so sad and disappointed that Sirius died. I was really hoping he'd live in your story.

Krazyasibe: Happy birthday! But why would you do that! I love Sirius!

alix33: No need for anyone to shoot Nott senior in his undersized wanker, Ginny will just have bat bogeys coming out of it rather painfully (and satisfactorily for us readers) in a jiffy. Dumbles had sweet fanny adams to do with the six being able to turn into animaguses. I like Lady Godiva's way of dealing with Death Eaters far better than I do any of the light side's humans' only effective for a couple of seconds stupefying. That vile bitch Bellatrix killed Sirius! I wonder which charm was used on the statue which made it keep Harry away from Dumbles and Tom Riddle junior.

wheezing-reader: Happy Birthday! Your story is probably one of my all-time favorite fics! Saying that WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK! No. This is not okay. I'm not okay with this.

Josh: Can't believe you killed Sirius! Hope something miraculous is going to happen. This is supposed to be about "A Second Chance" for him, so he needs to be alive!

Menna Taha: Happy birthday! But still how fucking dare you

jmdaz44: I know Sirius canon-ly dies in the fifth book but I was hoping you’d spare us somehow, especially after the proposal and pregnancy. Instead you were just fattening us up to be slaughtered. You’re cruel. I love the story and your writing but it hurts. It hurts. I truly hate your Bella. I should have waited to read this until this evening because now I feel like my whole day is ruined and it is just starting. I hope you’ve got something feel-good planned because I’m pretty down on this right now. I guess that parallels where we are in the story; things are getting real and nothing is for certain anymore. Hope is a dangerous thing.

alyson3il: First of all, HAPPY BIRTHDAY! I hope you have a wonderful day, and short hiatus to get everything straight! Second of all, WHHHHYYYYYY?! WHY? Why? Y? y? WHHYYYY! I thought Sirius would be SAFE, you lured us into security with Peter, but then it just HAD to happen. I got my hopes up that it wouldn't be him, he had Zee, he had the twins on the way, HE WAS GONNA GET MARRIED! I get that things happen, BUT THIS THING DIDNT NEED TO HAPPEN, or maybe it did. You're the author, you have a plan in place, and you know what you're doing. I'll just be hurt for the next two weeks.

Miss Elyon: 1) Happy birthday dear ! All good for you! 2) Thad Nott - It was too late! (I loved that Lucy killed this son of a troll) And Wormtail ... I'm sure you will be very well received in hell! 3) Bella ... fucking crazy bitch ... something will come to you and it won't be pretty! 4) More importantly - You made me cry so fucking hard with Sirius. I went into depression until you post again. I truly love your story (although it makes me cry like a baby!). The pain at his death was more brutal than the book. I know you have something planned (I hope) and I will be reading (with a sniffling nose) the next chapter! To cure this chapter I'll read the whole story again and cry all over again ... I think I like to suffer ... kkkk See you in the next chapter ;)

chefke: o.m.f.g. omfg. I'm freaking out

xcherry91x: OMG NOOOOOO! I was hoping that Sirius wouldn’t die. I cried when I read that. The babies! They gots no daddy

SuperBossy: Not happy at all.

rolly21: I can’t believe you killed Sirius. I was really hoping that you wouldn’t.

LilyBlack18: I was so not expecting that. I was sure Sirius wouldn't die . My god, reading his death again was pure torture. At least Harry still have Zee, Remus, etc. I'm so sad, though... I really thought you wouldn't keep that part of the story, and you gave me false hope when Peter died x)

greg.is.wilson: You are evil.

Mutt N. Feathers: Yes my dear, I do trust authors. Needless pain is never inflicted by them. I made readers think I killed Sirius too, but instead had other plans. You love him too much. I live in hope. Mutt

supersandman86: Oh man! Not Sirius! He just got his life to perfection. Loving son, a fiance and a child on the way. Nice to see Wormtail redeem himself by shoving zee out of the way and Thaddeus got what he deserved. Now we just need to give Crouch and Bellend Lestrange pain that even they can't endure. This was always the dark point in the whole franchise in my opinion, where Harry felt the most hopeless. Let's see how it goes.

Sirius black411: You are so cruel...so so soooo cruel. They were going to get married...have twins and raise them.. How could you?! I can't imagine what Zee must be going through but she is still there for Harry. She will be a great mother.

Wodril: This Sirius didn't really seem like the guy to be done in while taunting. Not being hit by the killing spell, and the whole "he'll writhe in pain as he dies" spiel makes it a bit more uncertain. I never really appreciated him coming back to life after the dementors, and kinda hope, for the sake of the story, he'll stay dead this time. He will probably show up as an inferi anyway?

Jewels46: Omg... I’m crying! You’ve reduced me to tears. I know it was a very real possibility, but I hoped it wouldn’t actually come to fruition even though I understand the significance. I do really like how you wrote his death though, a much more fitting end. The bit you added with Peter had led me into a false sense of security that the lovable mutt would be safe. I just can’t even right now. Wonderful chapter. I’m going to cry some more and eagerly await the next one

Dianne: Yes I need atleast 2 weeks to emotionally reconstruct myself after this bombshell of a chapter. Deep breaths in and out. Curious about how you've brought a 7th year canon event now itself. I'm not sure I even took in everything coz I was crying so hard and couldn't read clearly, was reading this at clg and I surprised everyone by suddenly crying out loud and sobbing :'( and everyone was baffled when I said one of my most favourite characters just died painfully and I was crying for that, but they don't understand the power of reading or the power of HP thankyou for an early update and kudos you're an amazing writer!

purplevictory: That wasn't nice. I mean, happy birthday and everything, but did your present to yourself really have to be the torture of your fans? I know Sirius will be fine, I just don't know how you're planning to get there. Thank you for the early chapter. But, when your birthday celebrations are over you really ought to write "I will stop being mean to my readers" 50 times. You don't have to use a blood quill.

Write lines as punishment? I don’t have time for that, I need to write the next chapters.

xXMizz Alec VolturiXx: Noooooo I can’t believe that after all this you still killed Sirius! When his life was finally all good with babies on the way!

eternal king of fire: wow this chapter was a tear jerkier poor sirus and zee

speedsONEandONLY: No. Nope. No. I refuse to see this as a real chapter. None of this happened. I mean what was the point of letting them be happy, of getting rid of the Horcrux early. Only to fucking destroy them. To make him want to sacrafice, kill himself anyway. This chapter didn't happen. This is a "what couldve been" I doesn't make any fucking sense. Nor does it for the narrative. So, No. I refuse to think, Believe, You could be so heartless to characters/people you love. That you made us love. I don't see anyway how the story Could really go on, if this chapter actually happened. It reads more like the last Twilight movie from when Aro rips off Carlisles head. Sorry, but no.

Sorry, I guess I’m heartless. Comparing me to Twilight though, that’s heartless.

Ari Black-18: I know that this is a war, but please let Sirius escape death again, don't do this please, please make this better, tell me that Remus and Tonks somehow save him, tell me that even tho he is in bad condition he's still alive, don't leave his twins and Harry without a father, don't live Zee without her love, don't rip away Remus's brother from him, give him a second chance from the original story, let him be there with Harry at the end, the world it's already too shitty for it even to suck in a fanfic. Call me naive or delusional, but I actually believe that this is not over, I trust you enough to know that you wouldn't do this, your story it's to damn good to lose such a character just like that, so I know you are going to fix it, you're going to pull a surprise under your sleeve and make us love it so much. I believe in you, I mean you wouldn't just kill Sirius like that, not this Sirius, your Sirius. I trust you, I know you wouldn't do this. Please enjoy your break, chill, eat a lot of snacks, maybe even party a little, and then, please, bring our uncle Siri back.

Seriuslypadfoot: Hey Breanie, very well written as per usual. I hope Sirius isn’t actually dead, as this story is one of the few Sirius and Harry fics that I have thoroughly enjoyed and don’t want his character to end this way. Powerful moment with Malfoy in this chapter, but I wish he showed more backbone and fully went against the death eaters like his family wants. Again, hope Sirius doesn’t end here, the death will really hurt the story in my opinion. But this is your story so write it how you will. Thanks for your hard work!

Thank you! Malfoy doesn’t have much of a backbone, but I do have a plan for him. I’m sorry you feel that Sirius’ death hurt the story, I think it’s important for what’s next.

DetroitNate: A review? I hated this chapter. Oh the writing is great as usual, but what happened in it? I hated, loathed, detested it. I hope justice comes and comes quicker than Hinny did in this story cause it is getting too difficult to read of how these vicious bastards seem to get away with anything they want. JKR did two things I can't stand in canon kill off Sirius and Fred and now I'm wondering if this story will follow her on that pattern... I hope not, I really do.

Thank you and I promise, justice will come quicker than Hinny -- as in it won't take another 197 chapters, maybe 196, just kidding!

Paola1991: So is this death for real or is he coming back? I mean you tricked us once. I guess i kind of assumed you’d never kill him off because it was kind of a sirius fix it story? Where he gets a better life? This took me by surprise. Its primarily why i hate book 5. I thought someone else was gonna die instead. Hes the one character i would never kill i guess. Especially with zee having his kids! Not sure how i feel.

Guest: can i honestly beg something? can you please bring back sirius alive? please? i know u wont do it.. u have a plan with ur story... but as a big big fan of ur story im really really begging will u please?

Queen Raja: Wow. And I thought the book’s death was heartbreaking! Seriously, bravo. I don’t cry easily, and this chapter made me UGLY cry! Waiting until two weeks will be very hard, but I’m glad you’re able to take some much deserved time for yourself and Dusk. Happy Birthday, Breanie!

Maisie: how and why could you do this to mee im cryinggg please say its looking better in the next chapter

midnitewanderer: Dumbass went and reread it. Not gonna lie, it was a brilliant chapter but I am still this close to hunting your ass down and forcing to rewrite Sirius back in. Where’s my angry emoji when I need it. I can’t help but feel that you wrote Zee the way you have specifically for this chapter. Not only does she come into their lives and becomes the best pseudo mom ever written in any HP fanfic, she basically adopts Harry into her entire family. Sure there’s stories out there with the Weasley’s treating him as one of their own but not like this. ZEE’S ENTIRE FAMILY ADOPTS HARRY. Your sneaky ass has been prepping us from the beginning of her intro! He calls them all Grandad/Grandpa, Grandmama/Grandma, etc. so that eventually he sees that he’s never truly alone. Then enter the Weasleys, McGonagall, Rem&Tonks, Andi&Ted, Dumbles, Nev, Lu, Mione, he’s surrounded by so much love. I just know the next chapter is going to be hard for me seeing as I’m a crybaby but damn it to hell, I can’t wait. 2 whole weeks. What am I gonna do?

Thank you. I guess I was kind of sneaky like that, wasn’t I?

Zacnelson0628: Breanie... I kinda had a feeling that was going to happen. Still really sad though. I hope you kill of bellatrix in a spectacular manner.

I will do my best -- I do know exactly how it will happen and who will do it.

notthatchhavi: Oh, wow! I don't know what to say! This was a extremely well-written chapter When Lucius said that Theo was his son...it was such a moment I went ooooooohhh Well other then that..I cried I literally cried when Sirius died and yes I am still in denial I hope atleast Remus and Tonks will be okay.. Harry needs some support from one father When Sirius died.. it broke my heart.. Harry calling Sirius Dad.. and Sirius saying that Harry was the best thing ever happened to him I feel that he was not saying that just to Harry.. it was to James too because the Potters were the best thing which happened to Sirius I feel really bad for Zee...being pregnant with your fiancée's children and then him dying is not an easy thing to go through But the most importantly...this chapter made me cry I have read many fanfictions.. but i have never cried.. they might have been super good.. but has never made me cry I think the ability for a writer to make the reader both and laugh and cry is extremely important and difficult...I think by this story you have proven yourself as a damn good writer

Having Harry call him dad was vital and every time I tried to change it, I came back to it.

josht1987: Just know, that I am very mad at you you right now. We'll see what happens after the next one. An extremely well written chapter, but... You know what you did.

Daerwin45: not Sirus oh please he is so important it was going so good im sorry i am just a fan and it has been such a great story i did not mean to question your reason. i just was enjoying harrys and Sirus' relationship.

PotterBlondie: Oh my god, I wasn’t expecting Sirius to die! Or for anything to go this badly in one chapter! I hope he gets to escape death again? Pretty please? I hope you had a wonderful Birthday!

midnitewanderer: Nope. I’m done. I’m done. I AM FUCKING DONE! I will have no more toilet tissue by the end of the night. My chicken is currently burning on the stovetop. My emotions are freaking fried right now. Not only was he... UGH! I can’t. I literally can’t right now. I know this is fiction and whatnot, but my heart is hurting. How in the hell did I get so emotionally invested in this damned story?! Now, I’m going to remove my burning chicken and cry in a corner.

scrappy8: OMG what a chapter Poor Sirius is gone

Covley Hatake: Please let Sirius some how had lived. I like cheered when Pettigrew went in the veil instead and then that. You like ripped my heart out with Sirius. Like come on. Still good story but wanted Sirius to be there for the happy ending. I picture Harry though being the best big brother to those babies and protecting the hell out of Zee and the babies. Betting she tells Harry soon as well. Also question if he is dead what does that mean for them claim the Black title? With out him to claim them they would be seen as illegitimate and as the deal with Malfoy was made he could take it? curious on that one.

akshutalankar: well this is a really bad chapter to be posted on birthday... plz give us next soon... make Sirius alive pretty please

shooter124: O my god, I am crying. Please don’t take Sirius from us, Zee needs him and so does Harry! However that death scene was crazy good. I’m hoping that you have this elaborate plan as to why Sirius had to fake his death or something. Please please please say he is still alive, Sirius and Zee have not finished their story yet and Remus needs his best friend. This is my favourite story I have read on FF, you are a fantastic writer and I get excited every time you post!

Wolf's scream: Nice set of Bat-Bogeys, Miss Weasley! Yeah, a ticked-off wolverine is NOT something I'd prefer to cross. Greengrass is there? That's ... something I was not expecting. Yeah, Theo's advice to smash the Prophecy seems pretty sound to me. (With the possible caveat that certain DEs might lose whatever semblance of control that they have...) Seriously, Hermione? That's not a "baby." And in any case, Petrification is not intrinsically harmful: it merely decreases the probability that the Petrified one will pose a danger to himself or others. Sheesh. Somebody needs to get her priorities sorted. :-) I'm a little surprised that the DEs that trapped the teenagers in the Brain Room were using less-than-lethal spells. Granted, I'm rather glad that they did, but I don't understand whys. Well..! Lucy IS good for something, I guess... It's rather a pity that Harry hadn't smashed the Prophecy and grabbed another as a decoy. :-} Oh! What would happen if Harry were to chuck the Prophecy through the arch...? Ah - excellent move, Lady G! :-) Remus was dueling Dolohov? But Harry had Petrified Dolohov just a bit ago... maybe another DE released him, or the spell wore off? So - the Rat did something useful before departing... BTW, a fairly effective dueling technique might be to blast the floor/ground out from under one's opponent. Or merely make it incapable of supporting the opponent's weight. Especially if one is in a structure and not on the bottom floor. Well, at least there's no ambiguity at all regarding Sirius's fate. :-/ Well, laughing at Bella is a pretty good way to ensure that she's even more off-balance, yeah. It's good that Dumbledore addresses Tom by his given name (vs. the nom de guerre that he made up)

Guest: You cant do this Sirius can't be dead! Please let him live! P.S. happy Birthday Seriously though bring Sirius back.

dhnysports88: for the love of god tell me they planned to fake his death, DON'T DO THIS TO US

minerdude: Wow this is a great story, even if you killed Sirius, although with the next chapter I hope we discover thinking he was dead was part of the fog of war. If Sirius is dead it was truly well written to get our guard down by sending Peter though the veil

Old-fashionedAnglophile: What. The. ACTUAL. HELL?! Are you trying to destroy us? And you're making us wait for it? Damn your excellent and captivating writing. I'll be waiting for the next chapter with bated breath.

Thank you (I think).

littlehughesy: WHY? Why must you keep killing off characters that I love!? It's like Game of Thrones all over again! I get that it is canon for Sirius to die at the Ministry, but for fuck's sake can't Harry just have a little less suffering for once? For the love of God, if you kill Remus and Tonks in this story, I am done. Just done. I cannot handle my emotions right now. Okay, venting over. As much as I don't like it, your story is still fantastic. And hey, cheers for the early update and happy birthday!

Atea1793: You... are... absolutely... evil... YOU KILLED SIRIUS, KILLED DEADALUS DIGGLE, LEFT ZAHIRA A PREGNANT WIDOW BEFORE SHE EVEN GOT MARRIED, MAY HAVE LEFT HARRY AN ORPHAN AGAIN, AND HAD THE MINISTRY FALL A WHOLE YEAR EARLIER THAN IN CANON?! I'M STARTING TO THINK YOU'RE AS SICK IN THE HEAD AS VOLDEMORT IS! Excuse me while I spend these next two weeks gathering a mob to go after your twisted ass. The Death Eaters will seem like playground bullies when we come for you...

Guest: Omg. Omg. You actually killed Sirius. I cried. I honestly would have rather see Remus die, but maybe that’s what makes this story stronger and more intense. I definitely need 2 weeks to process this. Poor Zee and poor Harry.

lcwintersoldier: Goddamit how could you kill Sirius :'(

LifeonEarth: Oh come on you hand to bring Marauder into this. This hurts.

I’m sorry, but I thought Marauder deserved to be in Harry’s thoughts.

White Squirrel: Why does everyone feel the need to kill off Sirius even when there's good reason for events to play out differently? Honestly, this whole section felt like it wasn't up to your usual standards. You copied so much from the book, even when they had different people there and a different plan. It would have made more sense and wouldn't have been that hard to choreograph a different battle sequence.

I felt that it was important to keep it similar which I will explain later on, but of course you’re entitled to your opinion.

love reading20613: Oh god no please no

alistark94: What an ending! I gotta say I'm suprised you still killed off Sirius. Great story by the way!

Anixara: Wow, I find this story just in time for the latest chapter to be THAT. God damn it. Now I have to figure out if waiting for the next chapter is even worth it with how much that fucked with my emotions.

Breaniefan: This was so unrepresentative of your characters to just shove them back into JK's exact plot. This Harry would never have been so impulsive, Ginny and Theo would have escaped, the well trained Order would have been quicker on the mark and more effective. This was just lazy writing, taking so much of the original story and just shoehorning it in - I'm so disappointed! Also why the fuck would you kill Sirius? The whole point of fanfic is to FIX those stupid character deaths from the original, not go and do it again. I've followed this story from the start and loved it, but if Sirius is still dead next chapter... You've lost a reader.

I’m sorry that I’ve lost a reader over this, but as I said, I knew he would die from the first chapter. Harry would be that impulsive because Ginny was kidnapped and there's no way he wouldn't try to save her. She and Theo may have been able to escape but not unscathed. I don’t believe that fan fiction is made to “fix” stupid character deaths because the original story is amazing and I’m getting the chance to play with the characters we all love so much and Sirius had a second chance on life and he lived it.

Adelite: AAAAH. aaAAAH. I came here for a BETTER WORLD and you killed SIRIUS BLACK of ALL PEOPLE and just when HE LEARNED HE IS HAVING TWINS?!?? I swear to god AaaaaahahahAH the original didn’t hurt this bad I read 219 chapters in 2 weeks just to be welcomed with this I am absolutely gonna riot and also what happened to Tonks? P.S if you kill Rem, Tonks and Fred in the battle of Hogwarts I will personally pee your pants

Pegg7: I can not believe it!!It has been chapter that i'm saying something bad was about to happen, but not this bad!!!!!The only think i can do now is wait and speculate: you had wormtail die through the veil and not Padfoot, so, maybe, there is a chance, i have hope! By the way, the chapter itselff is good, nothing less to say... I'm going to have a lot of speculation as how the thing are going to be next, so i'll dread this 2 next weeks Love you (a little less) as always

lovelyellie: that really hurt my feelings damn

phoenixmaiden13 (Lady Phoenix): I so hate this chapter, yet it was so good. Still can't believe you killed off Sirius, I thought he was safe for a minute but I guess not. At least they will have a body to bury. I'm going to go cry now.

They will have a body to bury and I hope that chapter makes you all feel the emotion as much as I did writing it.

MrToddWilkins: But he is still alive! The blood-Harry’s right!

Bosma18: Happy birthday but why did you have to kill Sirius he was one of my most favorite characters he and zee where supposed to marry and live happily ever after I wanted Sirius to die of old age while being surrounded by his grand children

Jmcglynn522: You killed him.... you killed him... he just found out that Zee was preggers, with twins(FYI: Taking antibiotic potions and birth control potions = Twins. Mine just turned 20.).And there’s no do over this time....no time turner.... just... you killed Sirius Black.I love your story, I’m bawling hysterically right now, but I don’t like you very much at the moment.... you killed him....why??? (Happy parts: Ginny preforming the “bat bogey hex” on Thaddeus’s dick for Theo! Lucius killing Thaddeus for hurting Theo, “his son!”. Ron touching “Uranus”. Lady G not dying. Zee not dying. And Pettigrew’s death was to kind.) And Happy Birthday!!!(Even though I may be traumatized for life.)

Pettigrew’s death may have been too kind but I think it was an important turning point for him in that he saved Zee for Sirius.

LordSmidgeon: I'm hoping so much all this was pushed in his head by Voldemort after the brain room to mess with his psyche. I'm hoping he comes to and they are just getting him away from the veil. Or it was all what he saw in the veil. Like honestly, if you have to have someone die please dont kill Sirius (at least not yet).

Siriuslover: Im in denial. He’s not dead. How could you kill Sirius!! He was the main reason I’ve loved reading this!! Ugh please take it back I’m so sad

kellykat1889: Your evil.

RiverFord: I think I’m going to need two weeks just to recover from this. I’ve absolutely loved this story so far but you literally just killed off my favorite character and I can’t even...

archiveScrapper: Happy birthday! I'm a long time reader and first time reviewer, but I finally felt like I had something to say (plus wishing you a happy birthday is important). I'm actually weirdly... proud? of you for keeping Sirius's death at this point in the story. In the books it's kind of the point at which Harry has to officially grow up, and realize that even though he's a kid, he's the center of a really vicious war where his actions have very real consequences. And he has no one left to fully protect him either. Even in a fic where Sirius matters a whole lot more, and Harry is gonna be a thousand times more hurt by his death, that moment of change, and of Harry accepting his inevitable place in this fight is really important? So I just wanted to say that as much as I'm really sad about Sirius being gone, because I really did enjoy him getting to be happy for once, i think it's an important moment for the story and I'm really happy that it's one that you kept even in a version of this story that's a lot happier than the original story ever was. I've been wondering how you were gonna handle this moment for a long time now, and although I'm definitely gonna go cry about Sirius's death now, I'm really happy with what you decided to do.

xXQueenOfDragonsXx: NONONONONONONOSIRIUS! I WANT TO HATE YOU SO MUCH RIGHT NOW BUT I CANT ‘T

TheOneWithWritersBlock: Please tell me this is a dream. Please tell me that Sirius didn't actually die. Please tell me that the ministry hasn't actually fallen. Please tell me it's all one big giant nightmare.

leflemmeenrose: Happy birthday!A break is definitely needed. I'm gonna spend it crying until you upload the next chapter haha. Take your time.

Zerius: Yay! Pettigrew's dead!I am struggling so hard not to say I hate you. I don't actually, but why did you feel the need to kill off Sirius?! He was Harry's family, he had Zee, he was in love, he had such an amazing life and now... Now he's never going to see Harry and Ginny get married, he won't see his children grow up... And Dedalus Diggle? What was the meaning of his death? Why did he have to die? And so cruelly... I love the new battle though. I've got a love/hate relationship with this chapter. Great job, can't wait to see what happens next. Please heal Sirius! Maybe he's not actually dead? Maybe there's a cure? Please say there's a cure! Again, amazing job! Update soon! I love it!

LaureWithAnE: I don’t really like you at the moment. But, happy birthday! How is it, after 17 years, the death of Sirius Black still makes me cry?

PurpleLotus (Person of Earth): Why did you have to kill Sirius? I just can't even process everything that happened. You made me cry and my heart is broken for Harry and Zee and the twins. I don't know what is going to happen and it's killing me. The ministry fallen already...I have no words for the desolation I feel. You have emotionally annihilated me, so congratulations. I understand the need for a break, I will be waiting impatiently for the next update. Happy Birthday and Happy Writing!

#a second chance #breanie #a second chance spoilers #harry potter fanfiction #fanfiction review

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abundantchewtoys · 6 years ago

Text

HS Epi: Meat p12 reaction

Back to Earth C presumably.

I gotta say, I'm curious to find out the final page count of Meat. The way we liveblog, the experience is stretched out, so with theories surfacing and such, we might be caught off guard when things are really over. There's only so far that things will be taken, though I guess we're still in for those "original Male/Female characters", I guess. :P That shouldn't refer to the new Reload timeline John created, I think, with copies of all the people mentioned in the rest of the character list. So, uh, yeah, guess the reason Arquiusprite wasn't mentioned in there was because he remained unseen, voided out if you will. And I guess we shouldn't expect an alternate Equius to have a talking role, either?

---

==>

Well! Talk about jumping straight into the action, this page opens with a dialoguelog! Back to Dave, Karkat and if my eyes didn't deceive me, we'll get some lines for Jade, too! Supportive Jade will be supportive.

"hit jane right in her neoliberal austerity measures" ... Hah. Well, I didn't think that would get referenced again at all, but it seems after all these years since John's 18th birthday Dave still has issues with the ol' N.A.M. So, Jane's a neoliberal AND a fascist now, Dave? Is that... even feasible?

"DAVE: now shes gonna spin some shit about supply side economics but we cant let her control the narrative on that one cause the first thing thats gonna happen once she begins deregulating the baking industry is that some sweet dumb crocodile down in consort land is gonna start putting sparkle glue in the cupcake mix which isnt even the real issue thats just surface issues KARKAT: RIGHT. JADE: definitely" ... Like, Dave I admire you're getting so into this, but you realize they aren't following, right? Also, why would Jane want to deregulate the baking industry if she's the leader of the foremost power in said industry, as well as running for president? Plus, Jane can't control the narrative because Caliborn is already controlling it! :mspa:

"DAVE: i mean earth c has just been play acting capitalism the last five thousand years while we timeskipped ahead to live rad lives as gods without bothering with any of the boring shit that goes into making a civilization DAVE: which is fine i mean you cant really expect a bunch of teens who didnt finish middle school to set up a sustainable form of social democracy that isnt just blatantly ripped off whatever we incorrectly thought obama god rest his soul was doing back in the day" ... Gee, Dave's given this a real lot of thought. Props to him, but I hope that aside from becoming 'an activist' he's also got some legitimite action points to improve Earth C's situation.

Guess Sburb really does a number on players, huh? "Congrats, you won, you're all gods now, and also, here's this whole civilization on the brink of collapse, have fun with that. Don't mess this up, I need those people to start the apocalypse in say, 2000 years, k thx bye." (The fact that this civilization, being outside of the Green Sun's influence, may never implement Sburb, is a bit besides the point since I think the trolls would have had the same issue tossed onto them had they actually gone through the victory door.)

Right, but the trolls had their home planet already effectively run by children, I wonder if that will come again? Even though they had carpenter droids at their disposal to run some things for them, they might actually be a bit more self-reliant than the humans!

"DAVE: but janes got this old school mentality you just know she wants to restrict grist alchemy for the sake of “growth” and when that goes down itll take three seconds flat for some nobody in new dersetown to drop the earth c communist manifesto" ... New Dersetown, I like the ring of that. Would call it New Dersey for short, though. :P Again, valid points there, Dave! If any revolt started, it doesn't have to be in the troll community, it could just as much be an angry carapace uprising! They're only docile if there's no one to rally behind.

Blaperile has this idea that the new society in a universe is not supposed to be seeded with the remains of the session nor the universe that came before it. That's actually a valid point; the only reason this society got kickstarted was through the cloning apparatus that was on the meteor! The consorts and carapaces seem like they would be able to reproduce biologically though, so I'm not sure how Sburb normally ensures the planet is a clean slate for a new species to emerge. ... Okay, so the planet itself doesn't really need to be the place where a new Sburb-playing species rises, true. There's a whole new universe out there.

Maybe through "importing" old Sburb technology, the "alpha" planet designation went to Earth C automatically, though.

Or maybe First Guardians are expected to 'cleanse' the planet from outside influence normally, but since this society's outside of the Green Sun's influence, that ain't happening. And Jade won't be going Thanos on Earth C.

"KARKAT: OH YEAH. JADE: of course DAVE: are you two even listening or are you just making noises with your mouths" Dave realizing he's monologuing? What character development is this. :O

"KARKAT: I CAN’T BELIEVE I’M BEING ACCUSED BY DAVE STRIDER, REIGNING EMPEROR OF SPEWING ENDLESS VERBAL DIARRHEA DIRECTLY INTO MY INNOCENT HEAR DUCTS EVERY DAY OF MY FUCKING LIFE, OF MAKING THOUGHTLESS MOUTH NOISES. KARKAT: JADE, ARE YOU HEARING THIS? JADE: im scandalized JADE: especially when JADE: there are much better things we could all be doing with our mouths....." ... Jade, your animes are showing again. ... I think that maybe Jade doesn't want this relation to be going where Dave and Karkat want it to go.

"It’s been a really nice day they’ve been having, and then Jade had to go say something like that. The air in the hive changes in a way that is palpable, in a way that she can’t seem to accurately gauge despite having both superhuman and superdog senses." ... Ah. So I guess maybe Jade just can't get a lid on some of her more... canine inclinations, at time. Welp!

"Elements of her outfit resemble her god tier jammies: peasant skirt, sparkly flats, and a bold choice in striped tights." Nice! That's only the third person who created an outfit based on her god tier outfit that we know, aside from Meenah and Rose.

"the couch where she crashed last night, and the night before that, and the better part of the seven years before that." It would seem Jade has the wanderlust then, she's more like the vagrant dog that comes visiting from time to time? More GCAT in demeanor than Becquerel, in practice. Heheh. Good for her, after being isolated on an island and then a battleship for so long, she's finally going out & seeing things!

"There are other personal effects of hers in the living room too: plants on the windowstill, her bass guitar sitting in a corner" Cool, so when she comes over, she typically lounges here then. Guess the flute never made it over, though. :p

"a horrific-looking periodic table that Dave made her for her seventeenth birthday pinned above the stairwell. He typed it in Comic Sans, and then deep-fried it to oblivion with JPEG artifacts." ... Next up, on For Fans By Fans...

"And Dave, with his preternaturally perfect timing, sweeps a hand over his tablet to bring up a new PowerPoint slide on the TV. He returns to his Comic Sans-written political presentation, gruesome artifacts and all" Dave, Dave that isn't professional at all!

", with the grace and proficiency of a man who has diffused an awkward situation in his own household many times per day, every day, for many years." Well, okay, that is really mature. But when Dave is the adult in a situation, the situation is very awkward per definition.

"DAVE: alternia: brutal eugenics based space dictatorship KARKAT: NOT UNTRUE." Succinct, brutal, but not dishonest.

"DAVE: troll homeworld: lord of the flies nightmare scenario where kids murder each other just to get the chance to get to grow up and murder other aliens instead KARKAT: IT WASN’T THAT BAD." Karkat. Karkat that isn't a valid rebuke.

"KARKAT: YOU MADE THAT LAST ONE UP. KARKAT: ALSO, IT WAS DISGUSTING?? KARKAT: GROW THE FUCK UP, YOU UTTERLY CONTEMPTIBLE, POTTY MOUTHED *CUNT*." ... The irony is stark.

"JADE: also you know trolls dont actually have two dicks dave thats an offensive stereotype" Are we really doing troll anatomy? Well, I guess it's good to know that the fan theory about Sollux at least isn't applicable to the entire species.

"DAVE: trolls: literally ate babies KARKAT: ONLY THE DEFECTIVE ONES. DAVE: like you my dude KARKAT: ...YEAH. DAVE: so thats why our campaign can work" Yeah, Karkat ate grubs, though they weren't troll babies. Also, yeah, Karkat was a mutant, but I wonder if that would really help his case here.

"DAVE: btw im gonna be giving a long form exam at the end of this to make sure youre retaining info because this is only like the most important thing weve ever done collectively" Well he ain't wrong.

"KARKAT: ARE YOU ASKING ME WHETHER I’VE HEARD THIS EXACT SPEECH ALMOST WORD FOR WORD, INCLUDING REHEARSED VERSIONS OF BOTH THE COLORFUL METAPHORS AND “JOKES,” TEN OR TWENTY TIMES ALREADY? KARKAT: BECAUSE THE ANSWER WOULD BE KARKAT: YES, OF COURSE I FUCKING HAVE." Poor, poor Karkat.

"Karkat elbows Dave in the thigh, a move that is obviously meant to be an action of pure, brotherly jest. But instead it comes off as affectionate and overly intimate. Jade’s clever eyes don’t miss this. Her pupils follow the motion of Karkat’s arm, and then they follow the movement of Dave’s mouth as he smiles in what he probably thinks is a totally neutral expression that reveals exactly 0% of his true feelings toward Karkat Vantas. In reality, his veneer is as thin and transparent as cellophane. He is the only person who can’t see through it.

Jade does some calculations in her head. Two kinds of calculations, in fact: mathematical ones and personal ones." So, is Jade reading too much into their relationship, or are the dudes just... Both too shy?

"JADE: soooooo JADE: do you want a projection of her first years hit on the economy down to the decimal with a 0.3% margin of error JADE: because thats a thing i can do if itll make you stop talking about this stupid election for ten minutes" I didn't know that were First Guardian powers! :p I suppose it might be her natural intellect though, but we've only known her as the hands-on science type until now.

"She proceeds to dazzle the two boys with explications on complex math utilizing taxation rates, GDP figures, and some damned thing called the “Laffer curve,”" Dang, Jade is as much committed to this as Dave! (Or maybe she learned all this because it means so much to him, that could be it too!)

"The thing about Jade Harley is that she’s not as good at personal things as she is at other things. Like science, or mastering fraymotifs, or kissing, the last of which she has definitely put a lot of levels into over the past few years because, well, what else are you supposed to do with immortal godhood once you hit the age where the dog hormones start kicking into overdrive?" Guess for dogs, kissing isn't that personal. :p And well, I guess Jade's only now learning the real consequences of turning into a real-life furry. At least she won't have had lack of candidates to practice kissing with. She might even have become the Witch of Spacing Out Young Adults.

"Her high-prescription lenses make her eyes look anime-huge. They might literally be glittering, she’s so completely serious about the issue she is trying to stress." And the fan artists rejoiced for all the new descriptions they have to work with!

" JADE: im about to lay out some cold hard evidence so pay attention! KARKAT: OH, HANG ON, LET ME GET A PEN." You can't live together with Dave for years without learning when it's time to start taking notes and grab a fucking pen.

"JADE: evidence about..... JADE: our relationship! KARKAT: FUCK" Pfff, okay, never mind. I think Jade might have hit a wall several times over before, trying to either define their relationship or take it to the next level. These dudes are really sensitive about their feelings, after all.

But it would be interesting, learning Jade wants to know where they stand just as much as the outside world does.

"JADE: you let me live in your hive when im in town KARKAT: I CAN’T BELIEVE... JADE: im preeeetty intimately entwined in both your lives KARKAT: THAT YOU’RE JUST TALKING ABOUT THIS? JADE: AND you dont disengage from about 86.234% of my flirtations KARKAT: WAIT, WHY THE FUCK WOULD YOU KEEP TRACK OF SOMETHING LIKE THAT? JADE: so....... are we doing this or not?" So, just like with taking on Lord English and acknowledging the lit fuse that is Earth C society, I guess the coming around of April 13th 2019 is when Jade had enough of all this silly business and wants to know what's what. (Also, I suppose the level of intimacy they shared on beforehand will be left to speculation.)

"KARKAT: DOING WHAT?! JADE: dating dummy!!!!!!!! KARKAT: OH. KARKAT: THAT IS KARKAT: THAT IS... A COMPLICATED TOPIC IN MY CULTURE THAT I’M NOT SURE HUMANS ARE EQUIPPED TO TALK ABOUT." Smooth, Karkat, real smooth. Maybe Karkat fears commitment will lead to some of their relationships shifting into other quadrants. And he wouldn't like to be moirails or auspistices with either of them.

"DAVE: also totally unrelated to the economy" ... Nice try Dave, but I think this can't be steered back into that track.

"DAVE: which not gonna lie is the only thing i want to talk about for uh DAVE: for however long it takes for this other conversation to stop happening JADE: so say no!!! DAVE: well KARKAT: UHHHHH JADE: im not just forcing this conversation for my sake! its for you two as well JADE: i mean after all this time have you two even kissed yet?????? DAVE: wha" I think Dave and Karkat might actually have been both content to stay uncommitted and fearful to put a label on it. Also Jade's question will presumably remain unanswered, it's already surprising it's confirmed she hasn't seen them kissing. And that is ignoring the matter of whether either Dave or Karkat kissed Jade before. I guess it's only fortunate for this situation that this instance of Jade never dated Davesprite, it would only complicate things further.

"DAVE: wha KARKAT: WH-WHY WOULD DAVE: uhh KARKAT: WHY WOULD WE KISS?? DAVE: thats KARKAT: THAT’S... YOU... I MEAN, HE’S... HE’S DAVE. DAVE: we KARKAT: AND I’M KARKAT." PFffffffff, hilarious! I can just see them blushing like tomatoes right now. Can't keep staying in denial bros!

"JADE: yes hes dave and youre karkat and everyone we know always calls you that JADE: “dave and karkat”" Hah! Yeah, but they also think you're part of the item, Jade. Care to shed some thoughts on the subject?

"JADE: i cant remember the last time i heard anyone mention one of you without the other JADE: the two of you have basically been together since your days on the meteor its SO obvious" Jade has turned this from a personal matter into a fandom matter. "Everyone and their dog knows you're dating, guys! Stop pretending otherwise!" It's interesting to note the different ways Dave has been seen handling relationships. When he dated Terezi in the GO timeline, it went south due her troubles in the black quadrant. When Davesprite dated Jade, it went south due to unresolved Dave issues, presumably having to do with his bros. With Karkat, Dave's been in a stable-ish thing for the longest time, though.

" KARKAT: VERY CLOSE FRIENDS WHO UNDERSTAND AND SUPPORT EACH OTHER ON A DEEP AND EMPATHETIC LEVEL THAT GOES BEYOND HATE OR PITY. YOU COULD EVEN SAY THAT OUR RELATIONSHIP... KARKAT: ...TRANSCENDS QUADRANTS." ... PFfffffff, so this could have been what it was like for the Sufferer and the Disciple, then! They were just never ready to commit? That would actually be funnier than it being this deep and fulfilling relationship. It would also make Doc Scratch' misgivings on the relationship even more hilarious.

"JADE: yeaaaaaah not gonna lie karkat but that sounds totally kinda gay KARKAT: UGH YOU HUMANS AND YOUR UNFATHOMABLE GENDER BASED QUADRANTS." ... Heh. Actually. Too trolls, the whole gender-based romance thing we have going must indeed be as unfathomable as leprechaun romance.

"Jade faceplams." Well that's a new verb. ;) What part of the body is the 'plam', exactly?

" KARKAT: ANYWAY WEREN’T YOU... DATING THAT CARAPACIAN COUPLE? LAST TIME WE CHECKED?" Lolwut. Jade. Jade are you... are you being a Ms. Casanova, a paramour or two in every city you frequent? If WV and PM turn out to be alive for the sole purpose of dating Jade, I'll choke on my drink.

" DAVE: wait you saying we arent fun JADE: whens the last time either of you left the house??????" I know Jade means it as in, she'd like to date them for keeps. But I also fulheartedly believe Dave and Karkat can sustain themselves on delivery pizza and chinese chow.

"In her other hand, she tries to grab Dave’s wrist, but he flash-steps to the other side of the couch." Well that's a new use of the power, guess Dave must really have felt alarmed. :p

"JADE: i wanna try dating for real KARKAT: HAVE YOU EVER CONSIDERED KARKAT: SORRY IF WHAT I’M ABOUT TO SAY TOTALLY BLOWS YOUR MIND KARKAT: DATING A SINGLE PERSON, FOR MORE THAN HALF A SWEEP, FOR REASONS OTHER THAN INITIATING THE CONCUPISCENT EXCHANGE OF FLUIDS?" Karkat is trying to throw the issue back into Jade's face by saying she should try dating for a longer period of time. But that's exactly what she's trying to do here! She knows who she wants that with! That poor little troll, he's not getting out from under this.

"JADE: third of all karkat arent you from a culture where people are expected to engage in romantic relationships with up to like five people at a time?? KARKAT: THAT’S NOT KARKAT: THAT’S NOT THE SAME THING AT ALL." If he's trying to avoid getting dragged into quadrants with people, he should stop upholding the validity of the quadrants to hold people off. :p

"DAVE: ok jade i think theres a flaw in your approach here cause you seem to think winning an argument on super clever logical grounds is gonna get a couple dudes to break down and fling themselves at you in like, a sexual way JADE: wellll it usually does ;B DAVE: oh my fucking god" So she swoons people by way of her big brain. Jade's got CLASS.

"This earns Dave a look. A long, sad one that has Jade messing with her glasses again so that she can peer right at him and apply some more of that faulty personal math to his facial expression." Just confirmation here that Jade isn't necessarily correct in all her assessments due to not being objective.

"JADE: dave are you in love with obama? DAVE: jade jesus where do you get this shit from JADE: is it about jesus then??????" Aaaaaand this has been derailed again.

"DAVE: no! DAVE: jesus wasnt even real JADE: i know he wasnt real! JADE: wait... JADE: are you saying JADE: obama was real? DAVE: ... DAVE: yes" Wut. Wai- I- Jade. Honey. Please. Guess for all her involvement in politics since, those isolated years on the island sheltered her WAY too much.

"DAVE: obama was real DAVE: he was the president KARKAT: AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA JADE: all this time i thought obama was like JADE: an aspirational fictional character that you modeled your life after KARKAT: AHAHAHAHA I CAN’T AHAHA BREATHE... JADE: like snoop dog or nicolas cage" ... Jade. Jade no. You're just making this worse on yourself. For Jade, there would have been almost nothing in Homestuck she'd have seen as a reference to 'real life', would there?

"senary numeral systems that allow me to do complex equations in my head" ... Why is Base 6 good for complex equations? I'm probably not good enough at math to know.

"KARKAT: WHY IS IT LIKE SOME SORT OF *TRAGEDY* HOW SHE WAS RAISED? KARKAT: BECAUSE SHE WAS RAISED ALONE BY AN ANIMAL?? KARKAT: *I* WAS RAISED ALONE BY AN ANIMAL!" There! It's getting acknowledged again, how Jade's upbringing more resembles a troll than a human's! Becquerel the lusus.

"There’s a ripple in the room that makes it clear their god tier powers have just clashed against each other. He shifts his arm through time and Jade warps the space around them so that she’s the one holding the tablet. This is not the first time that they have rearranged the fabric of reality for a petty reason like this. Karkat has permanently sworn off playing board games with them." ... Lol. First real use of the god tier powers in Earth C, and it goes like this! Wait, couldn't Jade have snapped... Right, no, she actually wouldn't have First Guardian powers anymore now, I forgot. Still, what did Dave try to do, move the tablet to another point in the timeline?

"The moment Jade brings the paint program up on the television, Karkat stops laughing. KARKAT: NO!" Oh boy. Time for the Penis Quadrant scene, this time with three people. ... This would actually fall under both definitions of a "sketch", actually.

"He tries to grab the tablet from her, but she’s hovering well above the ground and he simply is not tall enough to reach. With a shit-eating grin and deliberate care, Jade begins to draw a grid." He's going to jump up to grab her leg, to disturb the drawing, isn't he?

"She gives Karkat a pair of fuzzy, angry eyebrows" Now I'm starting to think of the Karkat expressions in that one Paradox Space.

"all he accomplishes is turning the redrom trajectory between her and Dave into a redrom loop-de-loop." This is all I could want from a reprise of this scene.

"JADE: see me and karkat have great black chemistry! KARKAT: IT IS NOT BLACK CHEMISTRY YOU HORRID NON-CHITINOUS WINDBAG!" A+ denial there, Karkat, props on the response.

"JADE: and now that daves all chill hed make a great auspistice" Jade just wants all Karkat's quadrants filled by the three of them, somehow.

"JADE: because you and karkat are kind of like moirails DAVE: no JADE: and you and i JADE: well yknow its always been pretty flirty DAVE: jade JADE: EXCEPT!

Jade finishes drawing a shaky heart directly into the paint program. It’s so big and bright on the TV that it fills the entire room with red light." She's putting all these names and symbols to the relationship, it might just be too much for these poor boys to handle. :p

"JADE: i call this political arrangement: JADE: fully automated luxury polyamorous space-time communism!!!!!!!" That is not the shipping name I would've chosen, but it's the shipping name we deserve. And hey, communism! Get it? Cause Karkat had a sickle.

I wonder what Karkat's take on polyamory outside of the ashen quadrant is, actually.

"Jade rolls her eyes and tosses both the tablet and pen over her shoulder. Dave flashes across the living room to catch his very expensive computing device in both arms. The pen bounces off his forehead." This. Entire. Scene.

"JADE: i have to go talk to roxy and callie about the election anyway" Well, she's going to let them stew on this for a while. But I'm eager to find out who Roxy & Calliope would back. You might think Jane's a given, but if she's been busy maybe they have grown closer to Jade & Dave!

"Jade clicks her heels together to propel herself back into the air and actually winks at them before absconding through an open window." Think happy thoughts! Also, I just realized becoming a god sadly never gave Karkat the powers of flight.

"Dave and Karkat both stare after her, silently caught in their own private rationalization spirals.

Karkat needs to verbalize part of his out loud." Ah, but can they stay in that spiral or will they have no choice but to break out of it?

"KARKAT: WANNA PLAY SOME TROLL TONY HAWK? DAVE: hell DAVE: yeah" Yyyyyeaah, they are not going to have changed when Jade comes back, will they?

So even Karkat calls it "Troll Tony Hawk", not whatever absurdly wrong name it'd have on Alternia, and not whatever Tony Hawk's duodecimal name in Alternian would be. :P

#homestuck #homestuck epilogues #upd8 #reaction #spoiler alert #jade harley #karkat vantas #dave strider #homestuck liveblog

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verdigrisprowl · 6 years ago

Text

Dec 17 Dancitron Movie Night - Gotham s2 e1-3

Everyone’s very disappointed in Jim Gordon’s life choices.

Today MedicalMurdersaurus 7:22 pm *SLIDES into the room Tom Cruise style, holding a sack full of his now several month old Halloween goodie haul above his head* NoodlesAtNight 7:23 pm *Soundwave's rushing to put everything together, having been so very busy today with... things. He JUST manages to twirl out of the way of Swoop's slide, and ejects Laserbeak, who practically mobs Swoop for the bag.* MedicalMurdersaurus 7:23 pm *SQUEAKS* BIRD! NoodlesAtNight 7:24 pm {{Gimme gimme gimme gimme, let Bird see, aaaaaaaaaaaaaAAAAAAAA}} SpecsTheSpectralDragon 7:24 pm *the dragon comes in /much/ more sedately and sensibly than Swoop. she's got her typical haul of treats! she's also got special "grayface gummis" made with mercury syrup that are shaped like the anonymous ask face. anon may have been a coward, but Bird will still get grayface snacks.* Hello, Soundwave! verdigrisprowl 7:24 pm *appears. he'd been hoping to get here before the other guests.* *oh well.* NoodlesAtNight 7:25 pm *Prowl can nudge Soundwave upstairs briefly if needs be?* MedicalMurdersaurus 7:25 pm *drops the bag in front of himself, then plops next to it and dumps it out for inspection* verdigrisprowl 7:26 pm *no, it's fine, he just wanted a quiet moment with him.* ((i'm assuming this is fuzzytimed to before unicron?)) NoodlesAtNight 7:27 pm ((if it's agreed that's best?? i wasn't 100% sure)) verdigrisprowl 7:27 pm ((i can say it's safe to say prowl wouldn't be going to movie streams if he's supposed to be organizing evacuations.)) NoodlesAtNight 7:27 pm ((then it technically took place yesterday)) [[Greetings, dragon. Those look new. Inspired?]] *Pings Prowl and heads past to oh so lightly brush his fingers against Prowl's before continuing to arrange the furniture.* NoodlesAtNight 7:28 pm *Bird gasps.* {{It so many! Where you Swoop get all this good?}} verdigrisprowl 7:28 pm *oh so lightly brushes back* MedicalMurdersaurus 7:28 pm *beams* All over! Me Swoop do LOTS and LOTS of trick or treat : > SpecsTheSpectralDragon 7:30 pm There was maybe a little inspiration involved. I hope they're good! NoodlesAtNight 7:30 pm {{How many trick you play? Them Autobots get fooled?}} [[He is sure they will be as delicious as everything else you make - and if for some reason they are not, our critiques will be gentle and helpful.]] MedicalMurdersaurus 7:30 pm Kehehh! Nahhh! No trick! All treats. ALMOST one trick. But Him do treat too : > NoodlesAtNight 7:31 pm *Tiny bob for the dragon. Respect!* Swervester 7:32 pm //oof dinner finished just in time NoodlesAtNight 7:33 pm ((welcome!)) Swervester 7:33 pm //also ya i figured fuzzy timed bc swerve wouldn't be here either if unicron happening lmao NoodlesAtNight 7:34 pm ((i just didn't wanna assume without input! all good 😀 )) verdigrisprowl 7:35 pm ((i'm gonna go grab food after take me to church)) NoodlesAtNight 7:35 pm ((np not starting til 8)) MedicalMurdersaurus 7:35 pm ((I've heard this song ten thousand times but literally this is the first time I have ever payed attention to the lyrics OMFG)) verdigrisprowl 7:35 pm ((until then i'll be dancing in my seat)) verdigrisprowl 7:36 pm ((IT'S INTENSE SHIT)) NoodlesAtNight 7:36 pm {{Who them almost? You want Bird trick them?}} SpecsTheSpectralDragon 7:36 pm *the dragon churrs happily. Soundwave is so kind.* MedicalMurdersaurus 7:36 pm Uhhhhh.... Me Swoop not remember name. Me Swoop not ask. No care. Me Swoop ONLY want trick or treat. For Bird! Kehehheh. And beat other Dinobots. NoodlesAtNight 7:39 pm *Bird rolls in the air, whistling happily.* {{You Swoop beat them? Them wimps. Swoop beat, Bird knows.}} opatoes 7:39 pm Oooh! I got here just in time, huh? MedicalMurdersaurus 7:40 pm *snickers and watches her go* Them not FLY opatoes 7:40 pm ((asdzxcbm i JUST got back from spidey im getting no rest tonight NoodlesAtNight 7:40 pm [[You really must tell him more about how you learned to do all of this some time, dragon. He is most curious.]] [[That you did, Smokescreen.]] ((aaaaa lucky!! i hope you enjoyed it)) opatoes 7:41 pm /Smokescreen's running in and is throwing himself at the couch- he may look a little funny tonight. Mostly that he looks like Starscream./ MedicalMurdersaurus 7:41 pm ((Oh! Is there going to be a Christmas Eve stream?)) opatoes 7:41 pm ((I did! It was really good! Swervester 7:41 pm //unless i get a laptop for christmas and am allowed to open it i'll miss eve stream, I spend the christmas night/day at my mom's and mobile rabbit doesn't like my phone so MedicalMurdersaurus 7:42 pm ((I'll be with fam too. It's cool. We might just need a recap before the following one.)) SpecsTheSpectralDragon 7:43 pm It... *the dragon considers for a moment* I mean, I guess it was difficult. But at first I was just- *hm, Prowl's here* I was just giving out plain energon. Then someone mentioned adding things. Then that one human, the feline human I think? Started making stuff. And I just... I just decided to try doing that myself. I did nearly blow myself up twice, but I already knew how to cook dragon-style, so once I figured out the rules with energon, it wasn't as hard as it could have been. Getting everything the right size for you all to eat was really the hard part! I had to rig up something so that I could get proper serving sizes. NoodlesAtNight 7:43 pm ((depending on how many people show up i will either just offer plot summaries for those who missed, or switch to something seasonal for one week and then resume 4-6 on the next week)) MedicalMurdersaurus 7:44 pm ((sounds good!)) NoodlesAtNight 7:44 pm ((but if i switch then any future misses will have to be summaries or we'll fail to hit venomtine's day)) MedicalMurdersaurus 7:44 pm ((venomtine's day is going to be a laugh riot)) SpecsTheSpectralDragon 7:44 pm ((hell yeah)) NoodlesAtNight 7:45 pm [[...Smokescreen, that is the most horrible thing they have ever done to you.]] *Eyeing the Starscream appearance before playing back the dragon's speech in his head to catch up* opatoes 7:46 pm ... I wish I could say it was, Soundwave. But man, I can't wait 'til a couple weeks after this! So I can look good again. NoodlesAtNight 7:46 pm *Swing and a miss on that humorous shot. Oops.*

[[Where did you find implements large enough for our servings? Special order?]] MedicalMurdersaurus 7:48 pm *makes no move to help Bird with candy mountain, cause a decent chunk of Swoop wants to see her try to fly off with it all* NoodlesAtNight 7:48 pm *She is definitely circling it and trying to figure out how to get it all back into her grip* SpecsTheSpectralDragon 7:48 pm ...You know those human car-building machines? I had to use two of those, a draconic control rig, and a pair- *uh, even though they're sterilized and very, very clean, she probably shouldn't cop to using corpse hands for anything* -and some other stuff to get proper manual dexterity. MedicalMurdersaurus 7:49 pm *is both delighted and intentionally useless* : > opatoes 7:49 pm /You tried, Soundwave. Smokey's not about to say anything that could possibly tempt worse things, though!/ NoodlesAtNight 7:49 pm *Maybe if she just... drops to the floor and scoots herself under it back first with the help of her feelers?*

*...................Nope. No good.* MedicalMurdersaurus 7:50 pm *claps both hands over his mouth in an absolutely pitiful attempt to control his full body shaking laughter* NoodlesAtNight 7:51 pm [[You are quite the inventive little organic. He suspects our Wheeljack would be fascinated with your ability to rig things if we could get him out of his damned laboratory.]] MedicalMurdersaurus 7:51 pm ((Laserbeak's eyes have been bigger than her gut for a while now. is tonight the night she is bested? XD)) NoodlesAtNight 7:52 pm *And not tempting greyfaces is very wise, Smokescreen. He's proud of you for having learned that, actually* SpecsTheSpectralDragon 7:52 pm I think he'd scream and duck for cover. *the dragon still puffs up, pleased by the compliment, though* The mechanical parts are more "creative" than "dangerous," but I suspect the code I had to use to get everything to interface together is a crime against programming. *oops, she said the C-word. sorry, prowl!* opatoes 7:52 pm /To be fair, he got into this mess by tempting them in the first place! He's gotta learn eventually./ opatoes 7:53 pm Say- Say, Soundwave, what kind of drinks do you have tonight anyway? NoodlesAtNight 7:54 pm *Okay. Okay. What if she - what if she bridges it? And she catches it in -- no, that's not going to work. How about trying to make a basket like Soundwave does?*

*She'll get about halfway into weaving one before realizing she won't have anything left to grab the candy with afterward.*

*She might just be, Swoop. Give her another few minutes.* SpecsTheSpectralDragon 7:54 pm ((there's cat hair in my apple cider)) NoodlesAtNight 7:54 pm ((mood)) SpecsTheSpectralDragon 7:54 pm ((how did this happen, I say as I pull my cat's face out of my mug)) NoodlesAtNight 7:55 pm ((at least YOUR cat was NEAR your mug. i somehow got one in there even though she was on the floor.)) MedicalMurdersaurus 7:55 pm *flops forward onto his belly, chin in hands, to watch her with the most devious grin* SpecsTheSpectralDragon 7:56 pm ((the second the apples come out, my cat is there. it's actually really weird. I have to lock my apples in the microwave because she will eat them otherwise. and if I leave an apple core in the trash can without bagging the trash up and removing it she'll knock the can over and eat the core.)) Swervester 7:56 pm //HA i made koolaid earlier, my cat wasn't even in the same room and there was haior in it Swervester 7:57 pm //i had to pull out three strands like cat pls SpecsTheSpectralDragon 7:57 pm ((cat hair is a magical substance)) NoodlesAtNight 7:57 pm [[Well, you are only a beginner. You can't be faulted for having so little time to practice compared to his species.]]

[[Oh, Smokescreen - tonight we have some of what Ravage has called a Thermometwist. Heated energon with minerals that leave your mouth feeling cooled despite the temperature. It is on the sweet and tart side.]] MedicalMurdersaurus 7:58 pm ((it's like ravage designed a drink specifically to make swoop feel attacked)) verdigrisprowl 7:58 pm ((IM BACK)) SpecsTheSpectralDragon 7:58 pm *the dragon chuffs* That does make me feel better. *she puffs up with pride* And in any case, my cooking is what I pride myself on. opatoes 7:58 pm Oooh- that sounds pretty good! I had to check before I got up, you know? /Now, slowly, slowly, Smokescreen is making his way over to the bar, grabbing onto anything he can to make sure he doesn't fall over. His new claws *might* accidentally go through a couch./ NoodlesAtNight 7:59 pm *OKAY. Okay. Laserbeak's got it. She's got this now. She knows exactly how to carry all of this upstairs to her room.*

{{Hey, Swoop. You putting goodies back in bag, taking upstairs. Okay?}} ((welcome back!)) MedicalMurdersaurus 7:59 pm *griiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiins* Kay NoodlesAtNight 7:59 pm *She whirs happily. Hah! No food yet has been created that will best her genius.* verdigrisprowl 7:59 pm ((i skim-backread but did anybody talk to prowl while i was gone)) SpecsTheSpectralDragon 8:00 pm ((the dragon said "Crimes" but that wasn't to prowl, that was just a dig at her own programming skills)) NoodlesAtNight 8:00 pm ((we start when song is done)) SpecsTheSpectralDragon 8:00 pm ((which start at "if about to blow up(); don't;" and go downhill from there)) MedicalMurdersaurus 8:01 pm *sweeps the candy back into the bag, missing a few here and there but not noticing* Me SWOOP can candy kehehheh *carries the bag away with just one hand because he can* NoodlesAtNight 8:01 pm *Soundwave sighs softly at the claws through the couch. He's never going to have a week where he doesn't have to replace SOME piece of furniture again, is he?* ((lmao what a description - and nay soundwave didn't say anythin else to him yet cause i didn't want it to get lost haha)) NoodlesAtNight 8:02 pm {{You Swoop stroooooong. Mighty Dinobot!}} *Picking the last few off the ground before following him.* verdigrisprowl 8:02 pm *is soundwave sitting yet? if so, prowl's leaning on him. if not, prowl's watching him expectantly.* Swervester 8:02 pm [he has found a seat, don't mind him] MedicalMurdersaurus 8:02 pm *understands sarcasm exists and doesn't even consider it a possibility because Bird compliments are <3* NoodlesAtNight 8:02 pm *He is just now about to sit, which he does with more grace than one would expect from someone who just saw his expenses grow and grew tired at the thought.* NoodlesAtNight 8:03 pm [[Ah, Swerve. Good evening.]] opatoes 8:03 pm /Smokescreen's finally grabbing himself a drink and, on the way back, finally notices the claw damage, wings drooping and staring at Soundwave./ Uh. Soundwave? Can I give you a gift later? Swervester 8:03 pm Hey NoodlesAtNight 8:03 pm [[Perhaps.]] MedicalMurdersaurus 8:03 pm *follows Bird's lead on depositing the candy in its new home and final resting place* opatoes 8:03 pm !! /He's waving at Swerve in excitement! This has got to be the most excited any Starscream look-a-like has EVER looked./ Good, good! You've always wanted another couch, right? NoodlesAtNight 8:04 pm *She'll have him park it riiiiight on top of her latest pile of snacks. Hopefully it won't topple.* verdigrisprowl 8:04 pm It's a brick wall. They can just take a jackhammer to the bricks. NoodlesAtNight 8:04 pm [[Perhaps they will? That was a month ago.]] SpecsTheSpectralDragon 8:04 pm ((what the fuuuuuuck, penguin)) MedicalMurdersaurus 8:05 pm *it does a little but whatever* NoodlesAtNight 8:05 pm ((he's pulling a mooney)) *Good enough for her! Hurry, hurry, back down!* SpecsTheSpectralDragon 8:05 pm I think it would hurt Bruce's pride not to be able to guess his father's combination. verdigrisprowl 8:05 pm ((i totally wasn't looking, who got shot)) MedicalMurdersaurus 8:05 pm *scampers down again, laughing all the way* SpecsTheSpectralDragon 8:05 pm ((no one I recognized)) NoodlesAtNight 8:05 pm ((penguin offed some rando who probably pissed him off/belonged to falcone)) NoodlesAtNight 8:06 pm ((OH RIGHT WARNINGS shit hold on)) SpecsTheSpectralDragon 8:06 pm *the dragon snickers* The Goddess was drunk when she let his soul through. verdigrisprowl 8:06 pm He can jackhammer his way into the room, take the door upstairs, and open it at his leisure. NoodlesAtNight 8:06 pm ((GOTHAM S2 1-3 // Violence, blood, death; includes eye trauma. Poor depictions of mental illnesses, continuing representation of a terrible institution. Flashing lights, foul/ableist/phobic(?) language, offensive accent imitation(?), passing mentions of sexual assault and cannibalism, character using incest implication for shock value against another character.)) MedicalMurdersaurus 8:06 pm Oh! Us watching FIGHTING movie! opatoes 8:07 pm ... Man, I gotta bug Megatron about swordfighting later SpecsTheSpectralDragon 8:07 pm He drank WHAT. verdigrisprowl 8:07 pm You don't pull a gun on looters. MedicalMurdersaurus 8:07 pm Dragon blood :V NoodlesAtNight 8:08 pm ((Do note that this season is eventually where we get what I promised the first time we saw Arkham; if Arkham looks terrible, there is a very good reason.)) SpecsTheSpectralDragon 8:08 pm He drank /WHAT/. *she'd be laughing, but her blood is vaguely blue* MedicalMurdersaurus 8:08 pm BLOOD NoodlesAtNight 8:08 pm [[Hopefully no dragon you know.]] Swervester 8:08 pm Is he ok opatoes 8:09 pm begone SpecsTheSpectralDragon 8:09 pm I don't think that the Gotham humans have any access to any dragons I know. opatoes 8:09 pm thought verdigrisprowl 8:09 pm ((seriously? a split personality? riddler can't just be riddler on his own merits for his own reason?)) SpecsTheSpectralDragon 8:09 pm ((I know, right)) NoodlesAtNight 8:09 pm ((not a development i much liked either tbh)) verdigrisprowl 8:10 pm ((*mentally replaces it with kronk arguing with his shoulder angel/devil*)) SpecsTheSpectralDragon 8:10 pm ((mood)) NoodlesAtNight 8:10 pm ((that works!! i shall join you on it)) [[Oh, punch him. He deserves it.]] *Settles up against Prowl. Ahh.* opatoes 8:10 pm Uh. SpecsTheSpectralDragon 8:10 pm Punch him hard. MedicalMurdersaurus 8:11 pm Where fighting go :< verdigrisprowl 8:11 pm I prefer the threat. SpecsTheSpectralDragon 8:11 pm ...Um. verdigrisprowl 8:11 pm The threat's legal and scarier. MedicalMurdersaurus 8:11 pm KEHEHEHH burp opatoes 8:11 pm Uh. Is that a thing humans can do SpecsTheSpectralDragon 8:11 pm No. No it is not. NoodlesAtNight 8:11 pm [[He didn't say not to keep the threat. A punch simply feels good.]] opatoes 8:11 pm ... man, human headlights look away NoodlesAtNight 8:11 pm [[But you are right. Legal is probably safer with Loeb.]] opatoes 8:11 pm weird Weird I mean verdigrisprowl 8:11 pm ... Hmm. SpecsTheSpectralDragon 8:12 pm *the dragon kind of wants to point out that biting Loeb's throat out would also solve the problem, but after The Javert Thing she's trying to be good* opatoes 8:12 pm Be Batman, Gordon. NoodlesAtNight 8:12 pm *It would get him put in jail. Can't do much detective work from in there.* opatoes 8:12 pm ... Who's Jerome NoodlesAtNight 8:13 pm [[The circus youngling who slaughtered his mother.]] opatoes 8:13 pm ... Is he the Joker human later NoodlesAtNight 8:13 pm [[Perhaps. He does not know.]] SpecsTheSpectralDragon 8:14 pm Ooooh, is she going to hurt him? MedicalMurdersaurus 8:14 pm Them stripey : > opatoes 8:14 pm ((asdxccvb for a second this felt familiar but i think i got this part mixed up with like... assassin's creed movie SpecsTheSpectralDragon 8:14 pm She did not. Hm. verdigrisprowl 8:14 pm ((the heck is with that skirt. it looks like an unusually modest Sexy Halloween Costume)) verdigrisprowl 8:15 pm ((prison striped skirt)) SpecsTheSpectralDragon 8:15 pm ((I know, right)) opatoes 8:15 pm Anarchy! NoodlesAtNight 8:15 pm ((they riff on the arkham wear late in the season, even the script knows lmao)) MedicalMurdersaurus 8:15 pm ANARCHY! verdigrisprowl 8:15 pm ((lol good)) MedicalMurdersaurus 8:15 pm ((god penguin is so gay for him)) NoodlesAtNight 8:16 pm [[Penguin does not owe you for that. You did that to repay him from previous ones.]] verdigrisprowl 8:16 pm There's a question of scale. SpecsTheSpectralDragon 8:17 pm ((Penguin is gay (happy) because he's gay (homosexual) for Jim)) verdigrisprowl 8:17 pm ((gay^2)) Swervester 8:17 pm [squints] Isn't this sliding into all those moral objections he had before. verdigrisprowl 8:17 pm It most certainly is. NoodlesAtNight 8:17 pm [[It seems to be.]] SpecsTheSpectralDragon 8:17 pm I would assume so, but it's hard to tell with humans. NoodlesAtNight 8:18 pm [[He stopped Penguin from getting arrested in exchange for helping to put away another criminal. He himself considers the scale even.]] SpecsTheSpectralDragon 8:18 pm Sir, are you- oh, it's Harvey. Nevermind, that's probably safe. NoodlesAtNight 8:18 pm [[The officer who stabbed a witness. Flask.]] NoodlesAtNight 8:19 pm ((be happy, harvey ;; good on you)) verdigrisprowl 8:19 pm ((good work harvey)) MedicalMurdersaurus 8:20 pm Soundwave. You fast forward to fighting part. NoodlesAtNight 8:20 pm ((i love that he walked. he's still so law-abiding he walked all the way to wayne manor instead of driving after having been drinking)) verdigrisprowl 8:20 pm ((i just assumed he didn't have a car without a patrol car)) NoodlesAtNight 8:21 pm ((also possible, but i like it the other way XD ))

*Soundwave leans forward, curious.* SpecsTheSpectralDragon 8:21 pm ((honestly same)) Oooh, the child's sharp. verdigrisprowl 8:21 pm "Personal honor." Not wanting to thrash somebody isn't a manner of "personal honor," it's a matter of morality. SpecsTheSpectralDragon 8:22 pm I'm not sure whether his docent should be chiding him or not for being so clever. *hah* MedicalMurdersaurus 8:22 pm ((I love this Bruce but I have no idea how, when Batman shows up, Gordon didn't immediately drive over to Wayne Manor to give him a talking to because he is SO CLEARLY tiny Batman)) Swervester 8:22 pm I guess personal honor and morality alignment could fall on the same scale but yeah that's definitely an issue of morality and probably legality SpecsTheSpectralDragon 8:22 pm *she /knew/ he'd be too proud to break down the door* MedicalMurdersaurus 8:22 pm Me Swoop like THRASHING kehhehehh verdigrisprowl 8:22 pm There's no pride in deciding whether or not you want to commit a lesser evil for a greater good. SpecsTheSpectralDragon 8:22 pm *...or not* NoodlesAtNight 8:23 pm [[Besides, if he does something against the law, Loeb will have no problem holding it against him. He holds it against them when they're still police.]] Swervester 8:24 pm Did he have a plan Oh. He did MedicalMurdersaurus 8:24 pm KEHHEH him punch with gun! verdigrisprowl 8:25 pm *sighs* NoodlesAtNight 8:25 pm {{It tiny thrash.}} *Chirp* MedicalMurdersaurus 8:25 pm *AAHHHH HER CHIRP IS SO CUTE* NoodlesAtNight 8:25 pm ((a note of interest: this chase sorta mirrors the one from S1 's opener with positions reversed, i think)) opatoes 8:26 pm Gordon... NoodlesAtNight 8:26 pm ((the weird cam angles, cop + criminal, through a kitchen, etc))

[[........../Well./ That won't be good. Primus damn it, human.]] Swervester 8:26 pm This child's catty. //rtdgfg does he read as autistic scale to anyone else verdigrisprowl 8:26 pm ((ur rite)) NoodlesAtNight 8:26 pm ((which who he)) SpecsTheSpectralDragon 8:26 pm ((hell yes he does0) Swervester 8:26 pm //bruce verdigrisprowl 8:26 pm ((bruce)) NoodlesAtNight 8:27 pm ((sometimes ye)) Swervester 8:27 pm //he keeps vacilliating between "no he's just traumatized" and pinging all my "ah someone autistic like me" brain signals and it's wild NoodlesAtNight 8:27 pm ((both. both is good)) verdigrisprowl 8:27 pm ((he can be both)) MedicalMurdersaurus 8:27 pm Bird : > Swervester 8:27 pm //i like both verdigrisprowl 8:28 pm Hang up. NoodlesAtNight 8:29 pm *Tilts his head.* [[A phone that big, going unnoticed? Someone was bribed.]] Swervester 8:29 pm Did she have any reason not to believe him until she called back NoodlesAtNight 8:29 pm [[Even humans are not that unobservant.]] NoodlesAtNight 8:30 pm [[He does not think your average mech would go away and be secretive about a sales call, personally.]] verdigrisprowl 8:30 pm ... Maybe Swindle. Swervester 8:30 pm Swindle absolutely would. NoodlesAtNight 8:30 pm [[...Swindle is granted an exception.]] verdigrisprowl 8:30 pm I suppose you DID specify "average" mech. Swervester 8:31 pm //crunch is better NoodlesAtNight 8:31 pm *Soundwave huffs softly.* verdigrisprowl 8:31 pm ((smooth forever)) MedicalMurdersaurus 8:31 pm You Bird funny and *somewhat uncomfortable at the words coming out of his face* cute MedicalMurdersaurus 8:32 pm ((throw another vote on the smooth pile)) NoodlesAtNight 8:32 pm {{You Swoop nice but noisy.}} *She pats him.* {{Shhhhh.}} Swervester 8:32 pm I want to ask who's head but I'm not sure I wanna know. MedicalMurdersaurus 8:32 pm *leans into the pats* NoodlesAtNight 8:32 pm [[A guard's, obviously.]] Swervester 8:33 pm This thunderstorm thing is real convinenant NoodlesAtNight 8:33 pm [[He does have a sense for the dramatic.]] NoodlesAtNight 8:34 pm *LOUD huff* MedicalMurdersaurus 8:34 pm ((so goddamn proud of himself)) *in his best whisper attempt* Me Swoop Dinobot. Dinobots not for quiet! NoodlesAtNight 8:34 pm *She whispers back.* {{You Swoop do good job though.}} verdigrisprowl 8:35 pm He's quite the expert manipulator. NoodlesAtNight 8:35 pm *Soundwave twitches slightly, but settles down again.*

[[He is. It is little wonder he pulled off what he did with his enemies last time.]] *Twitch again. Hm.* verdigrisprowl 8:36 pm *points at the man behind the podium* He made the... dragon blood drug. NoodlesAtNight 8:36 pm [[Yes. He thinks so. The voices match.]] Swervester 8:36 pm ...I should probably learn more about police roles because two seasons and I'm still not entirely sure why he's in charge of the police. verdigrisprowl 8:36 pm Oh. I didn't notice the voices. Well, further evidence. NoodlesAtNight 8:37 pm [[It is his job to observe voice prints. Do not worry.]] *Pats knee.* [[He is in charge of the police because he blackmailed his way up th-- what is /that/.]] opatoes 8:37 pm ... He's like my boxyverse alternate MedicalMurdersaurus 8:37 pm KEHHEHHEHHEH Swervester 8:37 pm Whoa verdigrisprowl 8:37 pm Dragon blood. NoodlesAtNight 8:37 pm ((TABITHAAAAAAAAAA <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 )) NoodlesAtNight 8:38 pm [[You do not breathe your blood out, do you, dragon? That seems... unhealthy.]] verdigrisprowl 8:38 pm I'm sure that's just the street name. opatoes 8:38 pm wait who's tabitha NoodlesAtNight 8:39 pm {{His sister. Neheheh.}} opatoes 8:39 pm b. but who Swervester 8:39 pm Jerome really bothers me man. NoodlesAtNight 8:40 pm {{What bother bar bot?}} MedicalMurdersaurus 8:40 pm Bar bot?? Swervester 8:40 pm I can't put my finger on it but he really rubs me the wrong way whenever he talks. opatoes 8:41 pm ... He seems like an evilverse version of you, Swerve Swervester 8:41 pm ... What opatoes 8:41 pm ... What I mean- like, weirdverse you? MedicalMurdersaurus 8:41 pm *imagines someone petting Swerve backwards like a fussed cat and snickers* opatoes 8:41 pm Jerome seems like a weirdverse name. Swervester 8:41 pm [sputters] MedicalMurdersaurus 8:41 pm KEHHEHH MedicalMurdersaurus 8:42 pm Her stab : > NoodlesAtNight 8:42 pm [[He's seen worse recruitment tactics.]] opatoes 8:42 pm Like, you're pleasant and likable and Jerome isn't- am I just sticking my pede in my mouth or something Swervester 8:42 pm You are [waves hands] opatoes 8:42 pm Frag- well, uh. Can we pretend I didn't say that then? Swervester 8:42 pm Yes opatoes 8:42 pm Thank you, Swerve- you're pretty awesome, you know! NoodlesAtNight 8:42 pm [[Not a jackhammer, but...]] verdigrisprowl 8:42 pm They could have just. Gotten a couple of pickaxes. MedicalMurdersaurus 8:43 pm That a BABY explode! That NOTHING. Him Wheelack do bigger boom in sleep! verdigrisprowl 8:43 pm That was entirely unnecessary. NoodlesAtNight 8:43 pm {{That just call snoring, peh.}} Swervester 8:43 pm Wouldn't some big ass hammers suffice NoodlesAtNight 8:43 pm [[Unnecessary, but precisely the thing a youngling would dream up, he imagines.]] Swervester 8:43 pm How long have they been dead? This is a really dusty cave NoodlesAtNight 8:43 pm [[Exciting, different, and noisy.]] NoodlesAtNight 8:44 pm [[They have been dead a year. And they did just disturb the cave.]] Swervester 8:44 pm Hmm Seems pretty cobweby for a year but maybe that's just how organic caves are verdigrisprowl 8:45 pm That seems a false dichotomy. NoodlesAtNight 8:45 pm [[His father was a rich human who likely had little knowledge of the real world. He wouldn't doubt it.]] MedicalMurdersaurus 8:46 pm What rich means? *knows the word but doesn't understand the context* verdigrisprowl 8:46 pm Oh, is that where the mayor's been. NoodlesAtNight 8:46 pm {{It mean own looooooots of money, loooooots of stuff. Them not need know what everybody else knowing.}} [[...Ha. Tarantula. Imagine him in there.]] verdigrisprowl 8:46 pm ... Why would you do that to the poor tarantula. MedicalMurdersaurus 8:47 pm WHy not know? opatoes 8:47 pm ... Is he gonna do both NoodlesAtNight 8:47 pm *Wiggling his little spider legs threateningly at the box head.* opatoes 8:47 pm Man, I would've picked choice A. NoodlesAtNight 8:47 pm {{Them pay not to find out.}} MedicalMurdersaurus 8:47 pm *looks at Bird with no comprehension at all in his optics* Swervester 8:47 pm Wow they really need Batman. opatoes 8:47 pm I wouldn't mind a Messy on my face. NoodlesAtNight 8:48 pm *Gently elbows Prowl.* @P: [[He trusts you would pick choice A as well.]] *Humor ping.* [[Wh--]] *Huffing.* MedicalMurdersaurus 8:48 pm KEHEHHEHHEHH Fall! SPLAT! opatoes 8:48 pm get him pictures pictures of spiders man NoodlesAtNight 8:48 pm [[Rather unobservant for a journalist.]] MedicalMurdersaurus 8:48 pm KEHEHHHH!!! verdigrisprowl 8:48 pm Getting in a tiny box with a tarantula? Sounds fun. Swervester 8:49 pm //that;s the worst time for the video to freeze on me ghbg NoodlesAtNight 8:49 pm ((do you need a pause?)) MedicalMurdersaurus 8:49 pm *wants to throw people with letters off a building* !! : > Swervester 8:49 pm //it's back now i just missed like 15 seconds lmao MedicalMurdersaurus 8:50 pm Nice verdigrisprowl 8:50 pm ... I feel like there are easier ways to get in the paper. NoodlesAtNight 8:50 pm [[That depends on what the point of the activity is.]] opatoes 8:51 pm ... Do people actually read newspapers MedicalMurdersaurus 8:51 pm What newspaper? *was but a wee dinotot when newspapers were a thing* verdigrisprowl 8:51 pm *... leans over to Soundwave* verdigrisprowl 8:52 pm @S «Where's the Starscream that sounds like a Smokescreen from?» Swervester 8:52 pm He's really interested in making a show of this isn't he opatoes 8:53 pm You'd think he'd just get a job in theater MedicalMurdersaurus 8:53 pm kehehheehhehhh! Him fall down : > NoodlesAtNight 8:53 pm @P: [[Smokescreen's world. The grey beings are having fun at other people's expenses again.]] NoodlesAtNight 8:54 pm [[Perhaps he was denied a beloved role.]] [[This could be his revenge.]] [[WHAT IS HE DOING.]] MedicalMurdersaurus 8:54 pm !!! Swervester 8:54 pm Alfred why verdigrisprowl 8:54 pm *prowl assumes soundwave means THAT smokescreen.* @S «So they switched out his voicebox?» opatoes 8:54 pm I guess that's true. That's the kind of thing a really passionate theater person might d- Alfred WHY MedicalMurdersaurus 8:54 pm keheh him SMASH verdigrisprowl 8:54 pm What the hell! NoodlesAtNight 8:55 pm @P: [[He isn't sure what they did, but they did tamper with him.]] Swervester 8:55 pm PRobably a good reason to let him see the thing so he could know what not to go looking for! NoodlesAtNight 8:55 pm [[Protect him? By not letting him know who to hide from?]] MedicalMurdersaurus 8:56 pm ((It seems like he shouldn't be able to fire his guardian. Creates some problems...)) opatoes 8:56 pm This... isn't going to go well, is it MedicalMurdersaurus 8:56 pm KAHHAHAHAH GET HIM!! verdigrisprowl 8:56 pm Wreckers. NoodlesAtNight 8:56 pm [[Taking lessons from Rumble and Frenzy, he sees.]] MedicalMurdersaurus 8:56 pm aww.... Swervester 8:57 pm Evil Wreckers. verdigrisprowl 8:57 pm Redundant. opatoes 8:57 pm Phfff. NoodlesAtNight 8:57 pm [[Hah.]] opatoes 8:58 pm Oh yeah! The game called "Bullet munch" right NoodlesAtNight 8:58 pm [[...Yes. Yes, he is.]] MedicalMurdersaurus 8:58 pm ((Every other moment with Jerome, I can tell exactly which Joker incarnation he's trying to be. This Russian Roulette thing is the only time he feels like he's genuinely got his own take going. I like it.)) NoodlesAtNight 8:59 pm [][][]The case is a bear?[][][] *Looks to Prowl* Swervester 9:00 pm Wow she's rude. NoodlesAtNight 9:00 pm [[What police slang is this?]] opatoes 9:00 pm She wants him to stay happy verdigrisprowl 9:00 pm I think it's Earth slang. NoodlesAtNight 9:00 pm [[Hmm. You drove with humans a while; do you know what it means?]] NoodlesAtNight 9:01 pm *He hasn't seen a single bear on this case. He doesn't get it.* verdigrisprowl 9:01 pm Not completely sure. But bears are considered big and dangerous. I like her a lot. She's probably going to die. Swervester 9:02 pm Probably opatoes 9:02 pm Are there any other good cops in this whole place NoodlesAtNight 9:02 pm [[Hmm.]] *He's mostly used to the pandas, not the oth-- PFFFF* SpecsTheSpectralDragon 9:02 pm *blinks* The docent is quitting? Really? NoodlesAtNight 9:02 pm [[He was fired.]] opatoes 9:02 pm ((... i thought he just held that pose it just froze on me NoodlesAtNight 9:02 pm [[He has little choice.]] ((do i need to pause?)) SpecsTheSpectralDragon 9:02 pm *blinks* Oh. Oh, yes, he. He was. opatoes 9:03 pm ((all good! SpecsTheSpectralDragon 9:03 pm ((whoops, I was half-watching and missed that)) opatoes 9:03 pm ((it just made it look like he was staring into space for much longer MedicalMurdersaurus 9:03 pm ((I guess I knew Alfred probably was loaded in his own right but I only just now realized how little he'd have in the way of expenses. He lives in someone else's home and drives someone else's car and I can't imagine Bruce makes him buy his own groceries. Where can I find a boy billionaire to work for?)) Swervester 9:03 pm Well that's awful timing for a chant,. NoodlesAtNight 9:04 pm ((Idk but you better reference me when you get hired cause I want in too)) [[Oh, leave the records human alone.]] [[You already protected her. You did what you could.]] verdigrisprowl 9:04 pm She's not interested. Leave her alone. verdigrisprowl 9:05 pm (("I'm gonna take you down the path that rocks.")) MedicalMurdersaurus 9:05 pm ((He'd pretty much only have to pay for clothes, entertainment, and medical bills, though I bet Bruce got him super fucking amazing health insurance. )) NoodlesAtNight 9:06 pm ((LMAO puff)) opatoes 9:06 pm Onions MedicalMurdersaurus 9:06 pm ono *realizes what's going on* opatoes 9:06 pm ... Well, I thought he was gonna go on SpecsTheSpectralDragon 9:06 pm ((puff just improves the riddler 200%)) opatoes 9:06 pm Uh. MedicalMurdersaurus 9:06 pm *perks up, wings flaring and optics bright* MedicalMurdersaurus 9:07 pm Him going to burn them! : > Awesome opatoes 9:07 pm Swoop, no, that's bad MedicalMurdersaurus 9:07 pm What bad? Fire fun : > verdigrisprowl 9:07 pm They can shoot at their knees. opatoes 9:07 pm Humans on fire is pretty bad. NoodlesAtNight 9:07 pm [[And risk missing?]] MedicalMurdersaurus 9:08 pm Bad for THEM kehheheh opatoes 9:08 pm ... Luckily, this human's bad at starting fires verdigrisprowl 9:08 pm You miss and you hit the ground or a tire. MedicalMurdersaurus 9:08 pm fun for fire person opatoes 9:08 pm GORDON NoodlesAtNight 9:08 pm [[Both of which are soaked in -- oh dear.]] MedicalMurdersaurus 9:08 pm KEHHEHEH aw :< verdigrisprowl 9:08 pm ... You could have driven a LITTLE further away. MedicalMurdersaurus 9:08 pm KAHAHA SNIPED NoodlesAtNight 9:09 pm [[At least this Galavan knows how to mind his loose ends.]] [[Though that will make it more difficult for the Gordon human.]] NoodlesAtNight 9:10 pm ((i like how that was a big moment of quick thought, school. i wouldn't wanna go back either buddy)) opatoes 9:10 pm ... Oh yeah, how much school has bruce been missing? NoodlesAtNight 9:11 pm [[Months.]] opatoes 9:11 pm ... Is that a lot of time for humans? NoodlesAtNight 9:11 pm [[Some.]] MedicalMurdersaurus 9:11 pm Month is a looooooooooooong time NoodlesAtNight 9:12 pm [[Hm. Cute.]] *Checking in during a hard day of work. He appreciates that.* MedicalMurdersaurus 9:14 pm *is instantly taken in by Alfred's storytelling and is glued to the screen* NoodlesAtNight 9:14 pm [[...What is a kipper.]] *It must be a blanket. Humans tuck blankets. And clothes.* opatoes 9:14 pm ... What IS a kipper? Oh! ... Fish smoke? NoodlesAtNight 9:14 pm [[When they're on fire.]] opatoes 9:15 pm Ohhh. MedicalMurdersaurus 9:16 pm Sausage NoodlesAtNight 9:16 pm [[Redball. A bloody bullet?]] NoodlesAtNight 9:17 pm [[He really must stop talking to her.]] opatoes 9:17 pm ... He should really trace this call Oh verdigrisprowl 9:17 pm That's obviously a trap. Swervester 9:18 pm Ah she's going to die. verdigrisprowl 9:18 pm Yell for half a dozen other officers to come with you. NoodlesAtNight 9:18 pm [[...He's not sure there ARE half a dozen other officers left.]] verdigrisprowl 9:18 pm If he'd yelled BEFORE he left there would have been. NoodlesAtNight 9:19 pm [[Oh, you mean Gordon. He thought you meant her. Yes, he should have got more. But he does like to go alone... and she does know that.]] [][][]No heroes.[][][] *Sigh. He still doesn't listen to Harvey, does he.* verdigrisprowl 9:19 pm That's why you always bring backup. verdigrisprowl 9:20 pm ... There's a movie I just saw where that's a plot point. NoodlesAtNight 9:20 pm [[Where what is?]] verdigrisprowl 9:20 pm Bringing backup. NoodlesAtNight 9:20 pm [[Oh? What is it?]] Swervester 9:22 pm Why do humans spit like that verdigrisprowl 9:22 pm It's— Don't go watch it, I—think I'm going to show it in a few days. It's an insult. They think spit is gross. opatoes 9:22 pm Poor Gordon NoodlesAtNight 9:22 pm [[He will not watch it, on his honor. He simply wishes to know what to be excited about.]] [[Return faster, Gordon.]] Swervester 9:22 pm But spitting just makes them madder, wouldn't it be better not to opatoes 9:23 pm ... You really gotta clarify verdigrisprowl 9:24 pm It's Buzz Lightyear of Star Command. It's about the star cop in an interstellar police force. It's... a hard watch. opatoes 9:24 pm Come on- don't kill her off too verdigrisprowl 9:24 pm *gestures at the screen. what did he say.* Swervester 9:24 pm Did no oe call am ambulance? opatoes 9:24 pm ... /Dangit, why does Prowl have to watch movies he wants to see/ NoodlesAtNight 9:24 pm [[Oh, he knows that name - the little space suited human who is friends with the cowboy, yes? It is about him?]] verdigrisprowl 9:24 pm They might not have got there in time. verdigrisprowl 9:25 pm I didn't see any cowboys. But there's a whole series and I only saw the pilot, maybe the cowboy comes later. NoodlesAtNight 9:25 pm *Nodding. He rather liked the Toy stories; he would hear about the Star Command stories too.* [[And her loss is regrettable. A commissioner who would finally do something...]] opatoes 9:27 pm Man, it must be a multiversal thing that Joker ALWAYS likes being on tv opatoes 9:28 pm thanks mr edge MedicalMurdersaurus 9:29 pm KEHEHHH lots of people SPLAT verdigrisprowl 9:29 pm *disgusted scoff. "tiny cogs in an absurd machine." juvenile.* NoodlesAtNight 9:29 pm *Shakes his head.* [[He continues to fall...]] *Glances at Prowl. Why the scoff?* MedicalMurdersaurus 9:29 pm YESSSS MedicalMurdersaurus 9:30 pm Again! Again! verdigrisprowl 9:30 pm *glances back.* He's pathetic. opatoes 9:30 pm The word of the night in gotham is defenestration NoodlesAtNight 9:30 pm {{That fun word. Bird likes.}} MedicalMurdersaurus 9:30 pm What word? opatoes 9:30 pm Defenestration! NoodlesAtNight 9:30 pm [[The Jerome human? Yes. Too flashy by half.]] opatoes 9:30 pm It means "The act of throwing someone out the window" MedicalMurdersaurus 9:30 pm Defense-stration Swervester 9:31 pm She definitely was making a ppoint opatoes 9:31 pm ... Yeah, pretty much NoodlesAtNight 9:31 pm [[She could not have made a more obvious one even with a whetstone.]] verdigrisprowl 9:31 pm And his "philosophy," if you can call it that, is... mm. NoodlesAtNight 9:32 pm [[Go on?]] opatoes 9:32 pm Go see your bff, Jim. Swervester 9:33 pm Don' seem fine MedicalMurdersaurus 9:33 pm ((give penguin a sincere hug and he'll do anything you want, Jim)) opatoes 9:34 pm Jim come on NoodlesAtNight 9:34 pm ((pfff)) opatoes 9:34 pm ... Man, go see the magician verdigrisprowl 9:35 pm *hesitates.* ... I... have very little respect for most people who complain about being cogs in machines. verdigrisprowl 9:37 pm ((you're right, you CAN tell which joker he's channeling. right now we've got heath ledger.)) opatoes 9:37 pm ... Man, he's really easy to manipulate Swervester 9:38 pm //i don't even remember ledger's joker that well rip opatoes 9:38 pm Like the first guy to come up to him and be like "I believe in you, do this" and he eats it up opatoes 9:39 pm Just barge in MedicalMurdersaurus 9:39 pm ((he did the growly monologuing about a past story thing a lot. But it worked for Heath because his stories were contradictory. With Jerome, they are true stories so it misses the mark.)) verdigrisprowl 9:39 pm ((mainly the "monologuing about tragic past stories to imminent victims" thing)) verdigrisprowl 9:40 pm ((YEAH THAT)) NoodlesAtNight 9:40 pm [[Ahh. Petrex history in play, yes?]] *Tilts his head.* [[Not everyone is content with such arrangements, of course, but... he supposes it depends on what the machine in question is. This one does have some right to want out of the one he was in, or so it sounds.]] opatoes 9:40 pm oh no NoodlesAtNight 9:41 pm {{Him easy to manipulate because him desperate. Need approval. It easy believe first good promise if all life bad. It gift from Primus.}} {{That what it looking like.}} verdigrisprowl 9:41 pm A fraction Petrex. A fraction abundant experience with the kind of people who make complaints like that. A fraction common sense and my own life experience ever sense. MedicalMurdersaurus 9:42 pm *glances over at bird and blinks slowly, that was a lot of analysis of something that was flowing right past him as he waited for gore* NoodlesAtNight 9:42 pm *Soundwave nods.* NoodlesAtNight 9:43 pm *And Laserbeak occasionally has her moments.* MedicalMurdersaurus 9:43 pm *doesn't have his moments and doesn't follow any of what she said to a next step* You Bird see a magician before? : > opatoes 9:44 pm ... Man, is that the only entertainment they got? They could've gotten... A bouncy house? Or something? NoodlesAtNight 9:44 pm {{Yes. Many time.}} MedicalMurdersaurus 9:44 pm What BEST trick??? : V opatoes 9:44 pm Uh oh verdigrisprowl 9:44 pm People like that don't seem to understand that "being a cog" means "being a part of a society." verdigrisprowl 9:45 pm If you're not a cog in a machine, then you're a useless cog lying on the ground. NoodlesAtNight 9:45 pm {{Best trick..... best trick saw him bot in half. That one, brother do. Heh heh.}} NoodlesAtNight 9:46 pm [[Ahh. Now he sees what you're getting at.]] MedicalMurdersaurus 9:46 pm PFF! Him Buzzsaw not a MAGICIAN! kEHHEHEH! Swervester 9:46 pm Is he hitting on her MedicalMurdersaurus 9:46 pm ((Alfred knows what's uuuuupppp)) verdigrisprowl 9:47 pm The opposite of being a cog in a machine isn't being free, being powerful, being liberated to do whatever nasty thing you want. It's being a hermit. NoodlesAtNight 9:47 pm [[What, then, would you call him? If he is neither cog nor hermit.]] *Quite curious now* NoodlesAtNight 9:48 pm ((alfred does indeed know)) verdigrisprowl 9:48 pm He IS a cog. He's just a poorly-shaped one that senselessly breaks the cogs around it. opatoes 9:49 pm This... is going to go really badly NoodlesAtNight 9:49 pm [[Hm. Then we'll have to hope there is a repair human present.]] NoodlesAtNight 9:50 pm {{Uh-oh. Him gonna get Buzzsaw treatment, neheheh.}} Swervester 9:50 pm This concerns me NoodlesAtNight 9:50 pm *Laserbeak begins whistling a funeral dirge* verdigrisprowl 9:50 pm ... Trap door. NoodlesAtNight 9:50 pm [[Hah]] MedicalMurdersaurus 9:50 pm *snickers and watches Bird out of the corner of his optic (probably more than he watches the show)* NoodlesAtNight 9:52 pm {{Booooo. That boring.}} MedicalMurdersaurus 9:52 pm Them do with no box next time kehheheh NoodlesAtNight 9:52 pm [[We wouldn't have much of a show if he perished, would we, Laserbeak.]] verdigrisprowl 9:52 pm Oh, HE'S going to die. verdigrisprowl 9:53 pm They're going after major political figures—the mayor, the police. NoodlesAtNight 9:53 pm [[Of course. Deputy mayors are next in line should the original go missing. Which has happened.]] verdigrisprowl 9:53 pm Billionaires too, apparently. MedicalMurdersaurus 9:54 pm Them bad at shooting keheh NoodlesAtNight 9:54 pm [[Naturally. If he is mad that his family built the city and was wiped off the map after doing so, then he will want to go for those who currently lay claim to it.]] Swervester 9:54 pm Given how corrupt Gotham is, the billioniares probably ARe major political players. NoodlesAtNight 9:54 pm [[And what Swerve has said. Quite the observation, mech.]] NoodlesAtNight 9:56 pm [[...Ah.]] Swervester 9:56 pm I see. verdigrisprowl 9:56 pm Aha. opatoes 9:56 pm ... Man, no wonder he got rejected from acting school NoodlesAtNight 9:57 pm [[Primus. /Ratbat/ was less obvious than this.]] Swervester 9:57 pm He's awfully aware of the camera, it's coming across really cheesy act. opatoes 9:57 pm ... How obvious was Ratbat? Like- any specific stories? SpecsTheSpectralDragon 9:57 pm *snrk* verdigrisprowl 9:57 pm ... *mumbles* thought he was pretty good. Swervester 9:58 pm It just sounded really scripted, is all. NoodlesAtNight 9:58 pm [[He was, up until he turned straight to the camera.]] MedicalMurdersaurus 9:59 pm *claps* NoodlesAtNight 9:59 pm [[A move clearly designed to ensure that the city knew his face. Someone who didn't care about that would not have turned.]] MedicalMurdersaurus 9:59 pm ((Did the writers forget she left him or are we supposed to think her brains are that scrambled?)) NoodlesAtNight 10:00 pm ((the latter. she thinks she can go back to him)) [[They would be too busy confronting the villain to bother with anything else.]] opatoes 10:01 pm ... Man, Alfred could've dealed with him just fine I bet NoodlesAtNight 10:01 pm ((bah the audio got mildly desynced. sorry)) opatoes 10:02 pm Bruce. Alfred knew how to make a bomb from memory- he's probably gonna be fine Swervester 10:02 pm Magician's knife or real knifw? Oh. Real? NoodlesAtNight 10:02 pm [[Very real.]] MedicalMurdersaurus 10:02 pm DEAD verdigrisprowl 10:03 pm ((WELL, I SUPPOSE HE'S NOT THE JOKER)) NoodlesAtNight 10:03 pm *Nudges Prowl.* [[Trap door.]] verdigrisprowl 10:03 pm *sharp laugh* NoodlesAtNight 10:03 pm (( 😃 )) opatoes 10:03 pm ... Wait, if he's not the Joker, who is? NoodlesAtNight 10:04 pm [[Not quite the laugh Penguin had in mind, he imagines.]] [[And he has no idea.]] MedicalMurdersaurus 10:05 pm ((becasue penguin <3s him)) opatoes 10:06 pm Dracula Cobblepot MedicalMurdersaurus 10:06 pm ((seriously how do none of the characters see the way penguin LIGHTS UP when jim walks in the room siiiiiiigh)) NoodlesAtNight 10:06 pm {{Temper, temper}} SpecsTheSpectralDragon 10:06 pm Don't throw things in front of your subordinates. At least walk into the bathroom, first. NoodlesAtNight 10:06 pm ((they're all blind... as a bat. dohoho)) SpecsTheSpectralDragon 10:07 pm ((hue hue hue)) NoodlesAtNight 10:07 pm *...Has a thought. Will keep that thought silent for now.* Swervester 10:08 pm She's standing with her boyfriend! MedicalMurdersaurus 10:08 pm ((gordon's face)) NoodlesAtNight 10:08 pm {{Neheh. Awkwaaaard.}} opatoes 10:08 pm Alfred is unstoppable! MedicalMurdersaurus 10:08 pm What awkward? NoodlesAtNight 10:08 pm {{Him Alfred like her Lee. Him Alfred not know her got sweetspark already.}} MedicalMurdersaurus 10:09 pm Oh. *doesn't get it* NoodlesAtNight 10:09 pm *Well, she's not explaining more than that.* MedicalMurdersaurus 10:09 pm *would moon over Bird even if Bird had a bf so...* Swervester 10:10 pm Oh NoodlesAtNight 10:10 pm [][][]Poisons the well.[][][] Swervester 10:11 pm Um. MedicalMurdersaurus 10:11 pm ((I know we talk about queer coding villains but, man, are there any queer good guys in this show?)) opatoes 10:11 pm Uh. SpecsTheSpectralDragon 10:12 pm *the dragon stretches* Goodnight, Soundwave, everyone. Thanks for having me! NoodlesAtNight 10:12 pm ((not as i can really recall offhand; this IS a fox network show unfortunately. but they do give us way more than we have on any other show, some who do good things at times, and many of the actors are, so i take it)) Swervester 10:12 pm //unfortunate MedicalMurdersaurus 10:12 pm ((I'm glad for canon gays and bis regardless)) NoodlesAtNight 10:12 pm ((most of the cast is pretty woke tbh)) [[Goodnight dragon.]] Swervester 10:13 pm I better head out too. Night all. NoodlesAtNight 10:13 pm [[Goodnight, Swerve.]] verdigrisprowl 10:13 pm ((you promised me a Specific Ship and I am Awaiting that ship. idc if they're villains i am Ready)) MedicalMurdersaurus 10:13 pm Movie done. You Bird want to candy? 😆 NoodlesAtNight 10:13 pm ((all in due time 😄 ))

{{Yes! Bird go candy. Swoop have... some. Three piece.}} verdigrisprowl 10:13 pm (("idc" i say like their villainness isn't also a draw)) NoodlesAtNight 10:14 pm ((same)) MedicalMurdersaurus 10:14 pm It Bird candy. Me Swoop give. : > NoodlesAtNight 10:14 pm ((half-assed spoiler: they also do something that pissed off the fanboys A LOT and are unapologetic about it being a first so ye)) opatoes 10:14 pm I should get some rest, too. Thank you for the show, Soundwave! Uh. And- sorry about the couch. I can give you a new couch- or if you just want credits, I can actually do that now! verdigrisprowl 10:14 pm ((you had me at "pissed off the fanboys")) NoodlesAtNight 10:14 pm ((that's s3 tho)) MedicalMurdersaurus 10:14 pm ((penguin better smooch jim fully on screen )) opatoes 10:15 pm ... wait, baking pie without a recipe? ... I. I'm gonna have to see that later NoodlesAtNight 10:15 pm [[You're welcome. Credits will be fine.]] opatoes 10:15 pm Can do, then! Also, you up for flying later? NoodlesAtNight 10:15 pm {{Swoop still can have three piece. Him Primus say so.}} *Maybe he'll believe that.* NoodlesAtNight 10:16 pm [[We will see. He has been... tired, lately. Perhaps one of the birds will see fit to join you.]] MedicalMurdersaurus 10:16 pm Primus? Keh! *assumes she's joking, he's Ratchet's kid after all, he's got NEGATIVE religious education* opatoes 10:17 pm Tired? You're doing okay- right? NoodlesAtNight 10:18 pm [[Yes. Just a great deal to think about. It will pass.]] {{Yep. You see, Bird show. Come on!}} *Float float. Toward the stairs she goes!* MedicalMurdersaurus 10:18 pm Kay! *scampers along after his borby crush* opatoes 10:18 pm 'Cause you know, if you need help with anything, you can send me a comm- even if you just wanna read or something. NoodlesAtNight 10:19 pm [[Thank you. That - is actually an important offer to him.]] *That hurt to say, but he got it out.* opatoes 10:19 pm ... Anyway, I've gotta go. I've gotta try to figure out flying and stuff. Have a good night, though. NoodlesAtNight 10:19 pm [[Do not fly high off the ground. Stay low. Very low.]] opatoes 10:19 pm ... It is? Like I said, feel free to take it whenever you wanna talk or need a distraction or something. opatoes 10:20 pm You got it! Man- years ago, you probably would've told me the exact opposite. Weird, right? NoodlesAtNight 10:20 pm [[/Very./]] opatoes 10:20 pm Anyways, night, Soundwave. NoodlesAtNight 10:20 pm [[Goodnight.]] verdigrisprowl 10:21 pm ... You let me believe that's a Starscream with a Smokescreen's vocalizer. He's not. NoodlesAtNight 10:22 pm [[...He thought you understood what he was saying.]] verdigrisprowl 10:22 pm What? No. I asked if Starscream's vocalizer had been altered, you confirmed it was likely. *he is :[* NoodlesAtNight 10:23 pm *Thhhhis explains why Prowl took that explanation so well. It was a failed one.* verdigrisprowl 10:24 pm *:[* NoodlesAtNight 10:24 pm [[He said he didn't know what all they'd done, but that they /had/ done things, and that it was Smokescreen's world. He thought-- never mind what he thought. He did an insufficient job of clarifying.]] verdigrisprowl 10:25 pm You could have clarified that it was a Smokescreen with a Starscream body. I spent all night thinking he was Starscream. What if I'd /talked/ to him? He'd start thinking he could get away with talking to /me/ if he puts on a disguise first. NoodlesAtNight 10:26 pm [[He should have. He did not, and he should have. He is sorry. You are correct. That had the potential to ruin your disconnection from Smokescreen. He did not and would never intend to interfere with such a choice.]] verdigrisprowl 10:28 pm *nods* ... Accepted. NoodlesAtNight 10:28 pm *The tiniest of nods.* NoodlesAtNight 10:29 pm [[That mech suffers more abuse at their hands than any other he knows about. He would interfere, but he does not know how; he no longer has any devices capable of blocking their work. The few he had were from sympathetic members of their species to start with, and he could not understand how they worked.]] verdigrisprowl 10:29 pm Mm. NoodlesAtNight 10:30 pm [[If you ever wonder if they have done something to him, chances are that it is so. Guard yourself accordingly.]] *That wasn't to gain sympathy for Smokescreen, mind. That was to note that it's common and Soundwave has no way to protect Prowl from it from the side, other than to note that.* verdigrisprowl 10:31 pm Mm. *that's quite enough of banana-adjacent topics. leans harder on soundwave in an effort to distract him.* NoodlesAtNight 10:32 pm *Doesn't know what to make of the Mms. Fidget.* [[Perhaps he should--]] *Oh. And now he's confused.* [[...All right.]] *Leans on Prowl. Is this what he's supposed to do now? He honestly isn't sure anymore.* verdigrisprowl 10:32 pm *he'll take it.* NoodlesAtNight 10:35 pm [[...He hopes the Gordon human does not give in.]] verdigrisprowl 10:35 pm He already has. NoodlesAtNight 10:37 pm [[More. Give in more. It's not--]] *Shakes his head a little.* [[He could do better than this. It's not impossible.]] NoodlesAtNight 10:38 pm [[Our society and species are infinitely more difficult to work with and you threw Fuse out. It is /not/ impossible.]] verdigrisprowl 10:39 pm ... I also hope he moves back up. I—understand his position. NoodlesAtNight 10:39 pm *Nodding.* [[He hopes so as well.]] NoodlesAtNight 10:40 pm [[He does not get the time to hear about as much in your department as he once did. It's - it goes well? What of Minus?]] verdigrisprowl 10:42 pm *optics flicker a bit brighter* Minus is doing well. Thus far she's been learning how things work inside of the department—paperwork and such—but I've been able to send her out with more experienced officers on a couple of calls with next to no risk of violence. Cleaning graffiti and such. NoodlesAtNight 10:45 pm *Oh. Oh, that's better. He found a good subject. Thank Primus.*

[[Good. Better that she learn there are other ways to handle things. Of course, he himself would leave the graffiti reading "Prowl is Right"...]] NoodlesAtNight 10:47 pm [[But he is far more morally malleable than she will need to be, and it is best that she learn from you and your officers. It does no good to have anyone else clean a wall just to put a bug in it.]] *Pause.* [[For one thing, suddenly clean spots are far too noticeable for that sort of activity.]] verdigrisprowl 10:47 pm Graffiti is graffiti. *still, pleased.* NoodlesAtNight 10:49 pm [[Perhaps. Buzzsaw would have his head if he did not ask this--]] *Twist.* [[Would you consider designating free spaces where it is allowed? Where anyone may go to express themselves, so that their voices are not fully restricted and you have less to clean elsewhere?]] NoodlesAtNight 10:50 pm [[Volunteered locations, agreed upon by many.]] verdigrisprowl 10:51 pm That's not up to me, but I'd be for it. NoodlesAtNight 10:51 pm *Brightens. It doesn't have to be up to Prowl, exactly; it just has to be something he wouldn't fight against if it were proposed to those who DID control it.* verdigrisprowl 10:52 pm I'd recommend putting them far inside and far outside the city walls, though. Or else the only thing anyone will be expressing is how much they loathe the opposite faction, until ten bots show up with purple and red paint cans and start a turf war. verdigrisprowl 10:53 pm That's what most of the graffiti we've been dealing with is—factional rhetoric, mainly along Metroplex's wall, the divider between Autobot and Decepticon neighborhoods. NoodlesAtNight 10:57 pm *Nodding.* [[He has noticed. He still disagrees with the divisions, but until that can be made to change...]] *Frustrated, sharp motion with one hand.* [[Until then, it would be helpful. And to him as well. Public opinion tracking.]] NoodlesAtNight 10:58 pm [[He is pleased to know you are not against it. That will make carefully whispering into the right audials so much easier.]] verdigrisprowl 10:58 pm Is all that intrigue necessary to get a few walls to spray paint on? NoodlesAtNight 10:59 pm [[After what he did? It may be. Besides, our leader is... well. He does not need to describe Starscream to /you./ ]] NoodlesAtNight 11:00 pm *Holds up a hand. Correction, please hold.* [[What 'he' did. He knows. Still. Perception is what it is.]] verdigrisprowl 11:01 pm Hm. Just don't try to sell it as a solution to graffiti. Or else when graffiti continues to exist in places other than the art walls, someone will try to use that as an excuse to take the walls down. NoodlesAtNight 11:03 pm [[Noted and highlighted. He will avoid that topic.]] *Settling down a bit now.* [[Have you had any ideas of your own? Any unusual improvements that might make your - or Minus' - life easier?]] verdigrisprowl 11:04 pm ... More new hires to replace the masses I'm about to fire. But that's for me to find, not you. ((brb)) NoodlesAtNight 11:05 pm ((np)) NoodlesAtNight 11:09 pm *Brightens more. Oh, this IS a good conversation now.* [][][]Masses?[][][] *Masses is a word meant for big numbers. Prowl does not use numbers carelessly. Soundwave is almost in Prowl's lap, he's leaned in so close. Curiosity!* verdigrisprowl 11:13 pm Mhm. You gave me quite a long list to work through. NoodlesAtNight 11:15 pm [[And you are--]] *He almost doesn't dare talk about it, like mentioning it will somehow make the multiverse force Prowl to go back on all of this. But he can't NOT speak about it. It's too different. Too good.* [[You are finding what you need? They really will be fired and tried?]] verdigrisprowl 11:17 pm *the ghost of a smile* I've got a couple of mad geniuses in Internal Affairs. We're digging up mountains of dirt. Of course, you're only privy to this information as the head of Four I. verdigrisprowl 11:18 pm But expect some comms from them in the near future. They'll be looking for some footage to confirm their findings. NoodlesAtNight 11:20 pm [[Nothing you have said or will say passes his lips. Obviously. Or his mind.]]

*He's going to be dizzy with shock in a moment. Digging up mountains of dirt. Masses of foul cops getting tossed out on their afts. Actually getting to /help/ with the footage he collects--*

[[And he's - that--]] *One moment. Gathering together again.* [[They will actually agree to trust him as a source?]] verdigrisprowl 11:23 pm You're the optics and audials of Iacon. Collecting footage and passing it where it needs to go is your job. NoodlesAtNight 11:24 pm *He pulls away, but only so he can sit back on the couch and stare up at the ceiling. This is nothing short of amazing, to him.* verdigrisprowl 11:26 pm ... Did— Did you not know that's part of your job. NoodlesAtNight 11:28 pm [[Collecting and forwarding footage has been his job for longer than he will bother calculating. It is only that he did not think anyone else would see past his name.]]

*And now he's sitting up again. Look at all this movement. You have got him all stirred up, Prowl. Nicely done.* [[Thank you. And them.]] *Close once more.* [[This is what should have been before. He does not know if you can understand, having always been on the other side, but...]] NoodlesAtNight 11:29 pm *That's just gonna hang there. He'll nod. Hopefully Prowl gets it.* verdigrisprowl 11:30 pm What—kicking out the cops that abuse their position? I was demoted for saying we should be doing that. NoodlesAtNight 11:32 pm [[You were?]] verdigrisprowl 11:34 pm Well—not JUST that. For saying that the enforcer system was corrupt and that for the sake of Cybertron we needed to clean up. verdigrisprowl 11:36 pm I could get away with speaking my mind under Sentinel. He didn't agree with me, but he—respected me. I could be outspoken. As soon as he died, I was shoved in a backroom to crunch numbers. NoodlesAtNight 11:36 pm *And Sentinel has just been semi-begrudgingly given one (1) single point of respect.* NoodlesAtNight 11:37 pm *Which feels very wrong somehow, but Prowl isn't allowed to lie to him about things that important, and so he's just going to have to suck it up and acknowledge it. Which he has. With one whole point. For a PRIME.* verdigrisprowl 11:38 pm Orion agreed too, but by the time he was in charge, it was a moot point. NoodlesAtNight 11:39 pm *Oh god, that's an even more grit-fanged point. He really doesn't like having to give that one away.* [[...If ever he finds a way to time travel, he will consider finding your younger self and getting you into a higher, safer position.]] NoodlesAtNight 11:42 pm [[For now, if you have no objections, he would show the depths of his appreciation for all you are by offering you... nearly anything you could ask for, he thinks. Within mostly reasonable - and legal - limits.]] verdigrisprowl 11:43 pm Oh, don't waste your time. If you ever find a way to time travel, kill Nominus, Proteus, and Ratbat, get Shockwave appointed to Prime—BEFORE he loses his face, mind—watch him carefully to ensure he isn't messing with any ores, and shut Megatron up after After The Ark but before Towards Peace. NoodlesAtNight 11:45 pm *He doesn't much care what it is. The world's largest collection of police dramas? A night of having every tiny wish catered to? Someone who needs a punch in the teeth to get the daylights scared out of them? What, Prowl? What? Anything. Tell him.*

[[Oh, those were all already planned. He does listen to you, you know.]] [[Except the part about Megatron. He is not yet familiar enough with that mech's writings to have thought of that himself.]] verdigrisprowl 11:46 pm His early writing was fine, before he slid off the rails into xenophobic apocalyptic extremism. verdigrisprowl 11:47 pm ... And I'm not wholly sure about Shockwave. Take that one with a grain of salt. He TALKED like an anti-Functionist progressive, but evidence suggests he was working on his ore project since long before his empurata, so that could all have been a façade. verdigrisprowl 11:48 pm Put him in charge, jump a few million years forward, see how that goes, jump back and take him back out if need be. NoodlesAtNight 11:52 pm [[As you recommend.]] *Soundwave dips pretty low there. He is being absolutely serious. Nothing about his mental voice says otherwise.* verdigrisprowl 11:52 pm *Prowl has too much power.* NoodlesAtNight 11:53 pm *Not so much. As he said, he was already thinking about quite a lot of that on his own.* *They've got to test tampering with timelines sooner or later, after all.* verdigrisprowl 11:54 pm ... I shouldn't be advocating assassinating senators. *a sentence like that is usually followed up with a retraction of the original advocation. it isn't.* NoodlesAtNight 11:55 pm *After a moment more:* [[...If that should mean it changes this in the process,]] *Gesturing to the space between them.* [[Then he will try to find you again. Or at least to see to it that you are happy.]]

*But that's too personal, isn't it? He quickly keeps going.* [[The senators in question are not alive now. You do nothing but partake in a thought exercise.]] *And that is his official word on it.* NoodlesAtNight 11:56 pm [[Besides, he has his own mind and is capable of acting on it by himself.]] verdigrisprowl 11:57 pm Pff. Just track me down, hand me a magnet, and tell me I'm neat. My standards were extremely low back then. NoodlesAtNight 11:58 pm *Disgruntled huff.* [[He will not be so lazy and cheap. You will be treated the way you deserve to be treated, and no less.]] Today verdigrisprowl 12:00 am Don't be TOO nice to me, I don't think I could handle that much positive attention back then. NoodlesAtNight 12:01 am [[Then he would be slow and patient. After all, the planet wouldn't be going anywhere anymore ... ideally.]] verdigrisprowl 12:02 am Trust me. Magnets and a single bland compliment are the best way to start. NoodlesAtNight 12:03 am [[Very well. But he can do better than that /now,/ if you will let him?]] verdigrisprowl 12:03 am ... All right. *a tad nervously. How effusive is this going to get.* NoodlesAtNight 12:05 am *That depends. How does Prowl take to being picked up and carried over Soundwave's shoulder like a sack?* verdigrisprowl 12:06 am *Oh. Very well. Carry on.* NoodlesAtNight 12:11 am *So it shall be.* [[Your department is in good hands, he has an intriguing forensic series bookmarked upstairs on his workstation, and there is an octopus-shaped magnet waiting for you on the small stand by the door. Let us be off.]]

*Already walking.* [[Oh, and he intends to perform a magic trick for you.]] *Huff* [[Before the night is done, he will raise the temperature back at your apartment without ever touching the thermostat.]] verdigrisprowl 12:12 am *actually laughs* I look forward to seeing this trick. NoodlesAtNight 12:12 am *Joins in and closes the stairwell door behind them.*

#chat

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hopoo · 7 years ago

Text

RoR2 Q&A 12/2/17

Since we got a million asks, I’ll collapse all the answers periodically into one giant QA so it doesn’t ruin your tumblr feed. I tried to answer every question - if yours isnt there, someone else might’ve asked the same question. Expand below to read!

Q: Are you thinking about putting out a beta version to test or are you just waiting for the game to be fully released A: Not sure exactly how we want to do it – we HAVE to have some way of getting the game out to testers, especially for networking/matchmaking testing. It will most likely be some form of closed/limited beta, but we really haven’t though too much about it.

Q: Any ideas on what the system requirements could be? Will they be high or playable on most machines? Also will it work with integrated graphics? A: Most likely the game will be pretty light for GPU with our graphical style, but CPU intensive. What that actually translates to won’t be until the game is closer to launch, where we start optimizing.

Q: ROR1 most loved thing me and my friends liked to do is ruining the framerate with all the items that we had. we had lots of fun crashing the game for whoever hosted the game. might this still be able to happen? I'm looking forward to the release anyway and so are my friends especialy with peer to peer now we can connect better. A: Uhh hopefuly you won’t be able to crash the game, but the game will still scale infinitely like it did previously

Q: Could you make it so that when you use Unstable Watch and timestop, all colors in the game become inverted for the duration? And if you want to go all the way with a certain reference, have only Chef's cleavers stop in midair at the edge of a radius from an enemy, and when the timestop ends the cleavers hit at the same time. A: No memes

Q: Super excites for risk of rain 2. Im real glad i found it in a steam summer sale, bought then and after that bought it for my ps4. Are we going to see any new characters? (Bandit will always be fav so as long as hes good im happy) A: Yes, definitely new characters!

Q: can you make one of the new death messages be "HOST WHEN?" A: No memes!!!!

Q: While Vita's out of the question, what about the Switch, which basically seems to have slotted itself in the 'more powerful handheld device' niche? A: We’d obviously love to be on the switch, but that ultimately depends on A. can we optimize the game to run on the Switch, and B. do we have the technical know-how to actually get it running? Porting to consoles tends to be a much more dramatic change than people expect, even if the engine natively exports to it.

Q: Hi. I’ve been a fan of risk of rain for the past few years. I just want to ask: in risk of rain, some mechanics like heaven cracker can pierce a line of enemies and the huntress’ ability to hit and run. With the change from 2D to 3D environment, how will they work? There are many other abilities and mechanics that i also want to ask about, but these two were the first ones that i could remember immediately. A: We’re not going to bring back any mechanics that don’t fit just for the sake of continuity – however, the Heaven Cracker I can see being actually more fun in 3D since you have to actually align yourself with the enemies. Since everyone can shoot and run in the 3D version, Huntress’ niche is sorta gone, but we have some clever ideas to make that back

Q: In DevBlog #8 you explain some of the steam integration going into Risk of Rain 2 which will make a lot of people happy but will RoR2 also be available without steam for those who prefer? For example will I be able to buy it on GOG like I did RoR1, and play LAN games without steam? A: Right now we’re focusing on making it work via Steam P2P, but (I believe) that we haven’t done anything to explicity lock out connections via IP. You just won’t get the same Nat punchthrough benefits (I’ll have to ask Jeff, our network dude about it to make sure this is correct, but afaik I think that’s right)

Q: Would you guys happen to have an idea of when you think the game would be realeased? A: Nope! Hopefully not too long!

Q: Hello! I loved Risk of Rain 1 and it is great to play with friends. I have two questions (technically three, I'm cheating). 1. I am assuming you're going to release it on steam, so that said will there be steam multiplayer integration? Like... Invite via steam, games are created with the help of steam peer-to-peer. It was a pain to get 4 people playing on one server without port forwarding. 2. Will there be a better way to keep track of items? 3. Can you add a menu to see what items you have? A: Yes, steam invites and all that are the goal. I know we talked about holding TAB to expand the item menu so you could see more at once, but we haven’t actually done that yet. I know it was a bit silly for it to be uncropped and expanding off the screen.

Q: Is this still in development? A: No we’re just pretending

Q: Are you gonna have the same soundtrack from the first game? A different soundtrack? A mix of both? (Don't get rid of the Dried Lake or Sunken Tombs songs). A: That’ll ultimately be up to Chris, but I’m sure he’s in the same boat as us and doesn’t want to cover the same ground that we did previously.

Q: I was telling a friend how excited I was for this, and he expressed a concern I’d like to ask you guys about. He said that, being 3D, the game might end up either not as hectic as the first, or too hectic, what with the hoards coming from all around you. What’s your take on this? (I’m not actually too worried about it, but I still wanna hear your take on the matter.) A: Currently, we’re using SFX as a tool to present not only how close an enemy is, but what state they’re in and how many there are. Since I’ve also been playing the game for like a million hours I’ve also developed the ability to recognize which enemy by the frequency of their screenshake… but that won’t be relevant to most players. We’re really hoping to avoid radars or anything like that for awareness.

Q: Just wanted to say, RoR2 is looking to be coming along fantastically. I really love that you are constantly taking things in unexpected directions-- I never expected to see the game translated to 3D but you have done it and I can imagine many hundreds of hours spent playing. Will Chris Christodoulou be working on the music this game as well? A: Yes, he will be back!

Q: Have you considered calling the second Risk of Rain "Risk of Twain"? A: Not until now

Q: This is kind of a question and a half. How big will the RoR2 maps be and will all the RoR1 maps return in 3D with the additions of new maps or just overall new maps? A: Overall we’re not really looking at the previous maps for the inspiration for our new ones – we’re not making RoR 3D, but a sequel, so we don’t really want to recreate too much old stuff!

Q: Since RoR2 is moving to more dynamic network model, how will people with screwy NATs be affected? NAT Punchthrough is great and all, but if implemented incorrectly can lead to multiple users on the same NAT being unable to join servers outside of the NAT (See Rainbow Six Siege). Will users still be able to host dedicated servers like the old game? What does this mean for users buying the game through GOG/Humble Bundle? Really hope everything goes swimmingly because port forwarding sucks. A: This is the exact reason that we will have to have some form of limited beta, because this is something that we can’t recreate in office. I honestly don’t know enough to respond accurately on what would happen in that particular situation, but thanks for the heads up

Q: Relative to the first one, will Risk of Rain 2 be a sequel, prequel, completely unrelated, or even have story at all? A: Sequel!

Q: How were you going to implement artifacts this time around? Is it going to be based around areas that are randomly generated and you sometimes have access, or multiple spawn locations, etc. A: Dunno, we haven’t implemented really any form of map permutations yet. The artifacts also ended up taking a much more important role in the game than we initially expected – not sure if the old way of unlocking is strange if it’s to be a core feature.

Q: (Big fan) I just had some curious questions; How many characters do you intend there to be in RoR2?, How differently do you plan on changing the previous characters?, Any hints on the final boss? pls, What is the estimated price of the game? and will their be any chance of PvP? Cannot wait, super hyped and keep up the great work :D A: We’re aiming for 10 characters on launch. No spoilers or hints! Definitely not PvP in any official capacity since the networking structure wasn’t designed for a good PvP experience.

Q: I've got three questions : 1) Will it be called RoR2 or will you find / have you found something else ? 2) Why the hell is there one more 'o' in the tumblr URL than in the actual 'Hopoo' name ? 3) What's the average of the team's favorite meals ? thx xoxo <3 A: I think it’ll just be RoR2. The hopoo tumblr was taken on creation of this tumblr, so we had to make it hopooo instead ☹

Q: Will RoR2 reveal why the Contact Light was carrying a teleporter linked to a planet crammed with hostile lifeforms? A: I’d like to explore what the heck is up with the humans in this game, but I sorta wish I had a better avenue that’s not just item logs and monster logs.

Q: I'm going to ask the real questions, is Sniper a man or woman? This is important because reasons. A:

Q: Theres something that confuses me alot about risk of rain 2. It's the lore. If the characters have left the planet, why would they come back? A: Canonically, the returning characters were never on the Contact Light to begin with (and presumably there could totally be like, a bunch of engineers and commando suits.)

#riskofrain #gamedev

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professor-doc-emeritus · 6 years ago

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NEW POKEMON TRAILER

THE GOOD:

rumors about the battle system changing were false

graphics are beautiful

spiritual sucessor to the pokewalker

speaking of, they seem to be wanting to emulate heartgold and soulsilver. whether this is real, me being tricked by the aesthetic, or wishful thinking remains to be seen

tagline “your first adventure in a new style,” so rumors of a shitty gritty story reboot were also false

co-op mode! thats so wild, im curious to see how its gonna be implemented

PIKACHU AND EVEE SIT ON YOUR SHOULDERS THATS SO CUTE

AND YOU CAN DRESS HIM UP OMG I HOPE YOU CAN DO THAT WITH MORE POKEMON TOO

THE BAD:

They are reeeeeeeeeeally pushing kanto nostalgia and pokemon go integration. To a frankly disgusting degree.

no pokemon outside of the original 151 and an OC donutsteel

encounter system is literally just a shitty emulation of pokemon go’s already bad wild encounter system. Like that shit was excusable in go becasue its a smartphone app, but are you seriously removing basic shit like battling wild pokemon?

pokemon go seems to be a major factor in the game, potentially screwing over rural players

by all impressions this game is essentially pokemon go in 3rd person

so after i finished typing this all up i read that this isn’t the main series game that was teased at e3 last year. Which is good. If these are just side games meant to get normies into playing pokemon on a console, then im all for these games. Fusing the two most iconic incarnations of your franchise and slapping them onto your currently very popular system is a great way to bring in a fresh audience. This is heavily targeted towards a new audience, so i think the over-emphasis on go and kanto won’t be a big deal. Hell, this would actually be a great way of shaking up the mainseries paradigm: use these games as a fallback onto the nostalgia & casual audience on the offchance an experiemnt with the mainseries game fails.

ultimately i have much less disapointment for these games now that I know they aren’t mainseries pokemon games. hopefully ‘lets go!’ can turn into another fun little side pokemon series like mystery dungeon.

#pokemon #i don't think ill get a switch for these games #my data plan really can't handle pokemon go so im not really gonna be able to use these to their full potential #also i think this indirectly confirms a september/october smash release date #no way nintendo is gonna make pokemon and smash compete

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artcanary · 7 years ago

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bronze 13 and 19 jean and corundum 15 and all of them for 3 and 6 this is a lot but im curious

Bronze;

13) Playing video games, would they be a completionist, a speed runner, how would they play? Completionist, definitely. They’re meticulous. Not very competitive, or “good” for that matter, but especially good at puzzle games and figuring things out, whether they have a time limit or not.

19) What would they like their mark in history to be?Well, they’d really like to implement a universal healthcare system of some sort. They aren’t concerned with being remembered for themself, they just want to improve living conditions for everyone in the world with their technology.

3) If they were a god which god would they be? I’m not sure if this means an existing god? Or just what they’d be like if they were one? The latter is easier, so I’ll go with that.

We’ve actually much discussed scenarios in which Bronze and their companions ascend to godhood. The funniest part about it to me is that Bronze would absolutely hate the notion of them possibly becoming a deity, since the concept makes no factual sense whatsoever, sort of a “reluctant hero” deal but like “bronze, youre obviously a god you have all these cool powers you cant explain! that must be awesome!” “NO! I CANNOT EXPLAIN THEM AND IT IS AGITATING ME!”

“what do you mean I have these magic powers because a whole lot of people think I have them? that’s not how anything works!”

I mean all that aside they’d absolutely be a god of healing, going along with their aforementioned goal to bring universal healthcare to the world of Embra. Even in the monotheistic area of Embra, they are considered an angel of life and death.

6) Animal, vegetable, mineral: what one thing symbolises them the most? Well, mm … mmmmmmmmmm… I remember reading that bronze and copper (like, the metals) have actual medical uses, so I’m just gonna go with the easy answer and say that, I suppose.

Jean;

15) What horoscope stereotype fits them the most? Aires, probably.

“Aries demonstrate strong personality. They have strong leadership qualities and honest and straightforward. Aries often have strong determination and can’t be deterred by failures.Aries are always eager for action. They take up to leadership spontaneously. But they don’t judge the pros and cons of a situation before acting. This also makes them vulnerable.”

3) If they were a god which god would they be? Definitely one known as a storyteller, maybe love and identity, too?

6) Animal, vegetable, mineral: what one thing symbolises them the most? This is totally gonna sound fake-deep, but their surname is derived from the scientific name of the flower carnation.

“White carnations suggest pure love and good luck, light red symbolizes admiration, while dark red represents deep love and affection. Purple carnations imply capriciousness, and pink carnations carry the greatest significance, beginning with the belief that they first appeared on earth from the Virgin Mary’s tears – making them the symbol of a mother’s undying love.”

Corundum;

15) What horoscope stereotype fits them the most? Leo or Taurus. Probably Leo.

“Leos are warm spirited. They are full of energy and always eager to jump into action. Leos crave for recognition and admiration. Leos always love to be at the centre of attraction. They strive to reach to the top in whatever they do. Leos always love to be surrounded with large crowd and admirers. However, they are often unkind to criticism and don’t take the words of critics lightly.Leos are very ambitious and choose their acquaintances carefully. They aspire for social recognition.”

3) If they were a god which god would they be? I legitimately cannot see Corundum actually ascending to godhood, but most likely one representing strength, enthusiasm and loyalty.

6) Animal, vegetable, mineral: what one thing symbolises them the most? Another cop-out, but…

“Corundum promotes insight to the unknown, enhances one’s intuitive awareness. Corundum stimulates ambition and confidence, subdues emotions and helps one to release anger in a positive manner.”

God, that’s a monster of a post! But it sure was fun to type! Thanks a lot!!

#long post #personal

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furiousconnoisseurcomputer-blog · 6 years ago

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