#im a person online but im not online enough for this shit
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i won't lie, coming from a cat owner but it really feels like that you can't share about anything regarding your pets online, otherwise people would automatically assume you as "irresponsible", even though your doing the best you can with what resources you have
Oh its HORRIBLE! And i do understand, there are enough videos out there of people who aren't caring for their pets properly - and I mean like... full on neglect and/or abuse... but thats not the case for every single fucking person posting something about their animals online.
Cats don't get as much of the brunt of this - I owned rats for years and there are many communities that will tear you to shreds for innocuous shit!!!
LIke I said, i DO GET IT. I love animals, i love MY animals... but holy fuck man you dont know those people, their pets, their financial situations, their vets, their resources !!!!
I live in a small town on an island!!!!!! Im on disability!!!!!! I dont make enough money for pet insurance and dont qualify for payment plans or loans!!!!!! Croutons is extremely picky and doesnt like wet food!!!!!!!! I have done so much god damn research into what will help him !!!!!!!!! If i needed help I would ask - i HAVE asked... I've just asked my friends.
Idk... if you're concerned about a pet you see online at least have the due diligence to read through all the information that that person has provided about them?
I might write up another FAQ again
#ask crout#AHHHH#thank you anon !!!#thank you to everyone also who AKJHD are being v kind and understanding about my frustration#AND thank u to everyone who loved my boy and worries about him as much as I do
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#mod babble#why. why did i see someone liking anti poly shit on my dash?#why are people marking blogs red in shinigami eyes over petty discourse instead of using it appropriately??????#why are there massive arguments over who has it worse as a queer person??? in the current climate????#guys the laser beams are headed straight for us and we're strapped to chairs we gotta help each other or we're going to die!!!!!!!!!!!#then after that we help more people being blasted by evil all over the world!!!!#i went down a rabbit hole while browsing some tags and just crawled out of it. never again.#im a person online but im not online enough for this shit#shit's lame as hell.#random#ace discourse#meme
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the company i work for decided that its switching from the german formal "You"(Sie) to the informal "you" (Du) in all of our websites so now we have to scour the entire database to change it and i quite frankly hate that, not just bc the unecessary extra work but especially bc its such a weird and unecessary change
i bet its bc everything here is getting englishfied (both literally and culturally it feels like, when my new boss talks its half in english bc every second german word is just replaced by an english one despite there being perfectly fine words for it in german too, its so annoying) and bc they want to sound more personal in hopes of getting more clients bc 'company is your fwiend uwu!!', i know this here is the amercian tm site so you wouldnt understand really but i do not want to be greeted with 'du' by companies, no, thats too personal, you dont know me and im not giving you my data, stay away!!
i guess thats how i would describe it .. the formal you is like a polite distance, like someone you dont know staying outside your personal space, but when its the informal 'you' it feels invasive unless i told you you can call me that, and that goes double for companies
maybe its a small thing that doesnt seem important but i cant stand it, im just a little part time worker doing data work so i got no say in it but the companies founder also announced hes giving his post to his kids some time ago so ...... since then theres been alot of changes and new projects that solely aim to imitate whats popular and whats done by other companies, despite ours being one that is, or used to be, intentionally different, like, that was the POINT, but i guess chasing trends is just too appealing for CEOs
#ganondoodles talks#personal#rare personal rant#theres more and more changes that feel so weirdly forced#like man#i thought being different was the whole point#like climate and ethics are .. or were .. the core idea and now i guess its just fine to do whatever conventional companies are doing#yeah woohoo lets also do an app thing that forces people to sign up if they want reasonable prices!#smartphones the standard everwhere!#who needs anything physical if you can put it in an a phone so syphon off data directly out of people fingertips!! yea!!!#lets use AI pitcures bc we refuse to hire more graphic desingers and they are jsut so overworked uwu#climate? ethic? whats that#argh#sorry this needed to get out#recently had a stupid conversation with a coworker bc i asked them why we are okay with AI shit now when it goes against what this-#company was presumably founded on#and he was rly defensive and said welll we dont have time and its cheap and also maybe we should got WITH the time#like that last thing especially pissed me tf off#but i cant afford to lose this job#im starting to hate it more though so the dream of being able to stay like this might not be real#i cant get a job in this place that is as nice to my mental health so idk man#i wish i was good enough at merch and online stuff so i could live of that#but even trying to find out how taxes work on that stuff is a nightmare to me
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ill probably delete this in a minute but ive just been fuckin boggled by what ive seen across tumblr in the last few days in particular. its why i havent really been around. like holy fucking shit, its really like some of yall just dont want a chunk of the trans community to exist. like some of yall are thisclose to saying it verbatum. way too many already have. 'shut up sit down be quiet and smile for us' type shit, gee where have i heard that before. oh yeah my entire life cause i was forcefully gendered as someones daughter. shock horror i know. you might be surprised to remember and/or learn that very few trans folks know theyre trans before we're 5, or even 10, and that that gendered experience stays with all of us in both/either small or large ways. either bc we literally dont have a solid identity yet (bc we're very small children), dont have the words, we're repressing it out of fear from how others will treat us, we're actually enjoying or enjoyed being another gender in our childhood, or we just genuinely didnt fuckin know until shit lined up later in life. weird isnt it that transmascs dont pop out as 6'1 brick shithouse cis men when we're born so yall know for certain that we're confused lost girls/women oops i mean big dangerous scary men. its almost like we're transgender too. none of yall actually know what intersectionality is or means
#my t#transandrophobia#yeah ill tag it why tf not#i just dont understand why transmasculinity is scrutinized and dissected like this within the trans community#when its just not the case for other gendered trans folks amongst themselves more often than not these days#which is a good thing! a really really good thing! but why are we scapegoating transmascs#''we need more weird trans people!!'' yall cant even handle like. a pre-everything trans guy coming out for the first time#yall cant handle a pre-everything tguy wearing a tshirt without tearing him to shreds & calling him shit like afag/theyfab & ukelele boy#im tired of my identity being treated as a debate. i had enough of that in highschool as#very literally. **the only trans kid in my grade** surrounded by cis teachers & peers USING ME AND MY BODY AS A TALKING POINT#i was the only one who wasnt deeply closeted that is. and holy fuck do i still not blame anyone for being closeted in that school#why is it only okay to try to separate trans ppl from our gender when we're not fem/me#why is one celebrated and the other treated like radioactive waste **within our own community**#god i need to find an irl community fuckin badly online trans circles are hell on earth#ill be describing smth that happened to me as a clocky tguy and someone else will say TO MY FACE#that what happened to me wasnt bc i was a clocky guy but purely bc i was trans#like i. what. how. how does that make any kind of fucking sense#i wouldnt be clocky if i wasnt trying to look like my gender. like i. hello?#would u say that to any other trans person or am i just that special?
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It's really disheartening that Rick Riordan stance on the war I understand that he wants to be neutral on this stance but in my opinion by becoming neutral he only worsening the issue as many Palestines are dying that are mostly children, how the majority of Israeli are supporting the Genocide of Palestine, and how the government is trying so hard (but miserably failing) to justified the genocide. I will hold him accountable for what he said on this issue as during this period the choice is basically "you are with us or against us."
Part of me wishes he will realize what he said was wrong and understand the bigger issue that plays at hand. I will criticism for his actions as how can a man who promotes LGBTQIA and representation of minorities and disabilities in his books turn a blind eyes to Genocide of people. However we can only wait and see on his next move.
One last thing about your previous you said you don't group Riordan with other authors where do you would group him with? Also this is more on an opinion base answer but many people are boycotting companies that support Israel there as been another post on Twitter on boycotting authors. Rick Riordan happens to be one of them. Do you believed that he should be boycotted with other authors or he should be properly educated and apologized for his previous statement? If you believed he should be boycotted what do tou have to say to those who might have the mentality of "separate the art from the artist"
thank you for this ask, and i completely agree with you! it is extremely hypocritical of him considering what he preaches for in his books. i think he’s convinced he has properly addressed the apartheid by using very vague language that can be applied to anything, and in doing so, he’s addressed nothing really.
your first question on who i would group him with— probably other authors who are doing the exact same as him in their virtue signalling. i always like to link my other blogs to each other, so i don’t think it’s a secret that i have a red queen account and i’m pretty passionate about that. unfortunately, victoria aveyard is another fantasy author who has literally wrote a whole four-book series on the uprising against oppression but is now playing neutral in her address of the apartheid. rebecca yarros is in the same boat, although i haven’t read ‘fourth wing,’ fans have said there are large themes of oppression within the book. so if i had to group riordan it would probably be in the ‘i-like-to-write-about-it-for-profit-and-praise-only’ group.
in terms of boycotting, i think that’s a great idea! i would also like to remind everyone that the percy jackson tv show is coming out in a little over a month, but disney is a huge industry financially supporting israel as well ($2 million in funding), which is obviously far more damning than a poorly written address by one person. there is a boycott happening for disney as well— and the pjo show will be released on disney + . i implore everyone to not watch it on that platform!! personally i will be pirating it online (idk if i’ll get into trouble saying that here but lol oh well), because im pretty sure the boycott is only for withdrawing financial support, not simply consuming media.
i feel like separating art from the artist only works if that artist is… like, dead, and you’re using that art and its values as a historical insight to how the world was during its time. you can still like a piece of work that has a problematic artist, you can engage with the work (to an extent). but separating art from the artist barely works because either:
to engage with the art is to support the artist in some way, so that artist is making money based on your interaction with that (particularly in the case for singers and streaming of songs)
that artists’ views and values are so rancid that it’s literally embedded within the text itself. to ignore it is harmful.
harry potter is my all-time favourite example to use, because jkr is the scum of the earth, and her views are entrenched in her work. a lesser known example is sarah j maas and her books (she’s also not as dogshit as jkr, but then again, its not hard to be a better person than her). i’m not going to bag on these people for liking things by problematic people (would be hypocritical of me), i just think it’s cowardly not to address it when you come across it, or at least admit to it. to simply write things off as ‘separate to the artist’ is like purposefully turning off your critical thinking skills.
on whether boycotting or an apology is enough— if riordan did apologise and used specific language and not the nonsense he had in that blog, expressed his remorse for his ignorance and then actually did or said something to support the people of palestine then, yeah. that’s fine and that’s how we learn ig. but he should educate himself, too many activists, people from the arab community and especially palestinians are expected to be all-knowing and to educate everyone else on an already draining and personal tragedy. it’s been exhausting for me, i can’t imagine what they’re going through. if riordan (or anyone) needs to be educated, he should do it himself, and (at least in my opinion) i don’t think the info is very hard to find now. it’s just about weeding out the misinformation.
i think boycotting is a good idea as of now. it can serve to be a catalyst for self reflection for many people. also, as much as i hate most online discourses, talking about it online needs to happen. i don’t want these authors to forget, for a moment, about the ignorance they posted online during a time of international crisis.
#sorry if this is so messy. its 3am where i am rn#i finished two exams today and my brain is deaddd#but ty for this ask!#i have sooo many opinions about the whole ‘separate the art from artist’ and when to boycott something#because usually im actually not a big fan of boycotting. i just dont think it works most of the time (at least recently)#boycotting as a way of ‘canceling’ someone is something i think is a bit silly for instance.#esp when people gonna forget about what that person did in like. two months at most#but i feel like this issue (especially for corporations funding millions of dollars into genocide) is big enough to warrant a call for-#-everyone to abstain financially from things#like it isnt someone saying some dumb shit online. theres a whole country being wiped out.#unfortunately so many corporations fund israel. an insidious amount. so just do ur best to navigate thru it#riordanverse#incorrect riordanverse#rick riordan#hoo#heroes of olympus#percy jackson#pjo#trials of apollo#toa#ask#anon#free palestine#percy jackson disney+#pjo tv show#rewriting
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just so you all know i am just straight up never going to be cool or perfect ever. im always going to be lame and a bit weird at times and im going to fuck up SO many times actually. i am also going to be a pussy and not stand up for shit, so please don’t get mad at me online ever cuz i cant assure you that if that happens i won’t delete every trace of my existence and never go online again out of fear
ok thank u!!i see people expecting wayyy too much of other people online and like…im not the person you wanna expect anything of. you all build an opinion of me that’s like 10000x better than the actual me and that’s great I’m not complaining but my line of good takes is going to end one day or another because i cannot believe ive gotten this far, and when i make a bad one i need you to not get mad at me thanks
#im so scared ill make a bad take and y’all will do a 180 on me#this is like the first time ive ever been even#SORT OF ‘popular’ online#(don’t consider myself it tbh but some do???)#and it’s SCARY#because by all definition I’m just some lame ass weirdo!!!!#and you think I’m so much cooler than i am!!!!#i used to be the person who butt into conversations others would have awkwardly#or who made posts that got 0 notes on average#with my biggest post being 18 notes#this is so weird and surreal and scary#having people like my stuff or care about me online#weird shit#people who LOOK UP TO ME???#insane.#i don’t get it!! or understand!!#I’m autistic (surprise surprise) and having people LIKE me is unheard of#willddd shit#it probably seems small to others#im not like. insanely popular#or highly well known#im not a figure by any means necessary#but#enough people like me to make a difference#a good one! but a scary one#idk aaa#this is gonna be an 8-noter boys i can tell#at best
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Do you think you’ll ever do art commissions?
^^
im not really sure. art commissions would let me work at my own pace and make money on the side, but im worried of things thatll get in the way
firstly im more used to drawing for myself. ive drawn other ppls characters and fanart, but those are on my own whims and pace and i dont have to negotiate things with anyone. drawing for someone else can be helpful since i work best with instructions, but im not very keen on doing things im not interested in and i might be hard to work with
i also avoid using online payments when i can, so im apprehensive around making online transactions. etransfer policies arent very kind to artists and theres also the risk of disclosing my personal information
given the industry im going into, im aware that im gonna have to figure out how to tackle these sooner or later, and maybe then ill be confident enough to manage commissions. but right now its fuzzy
#this isnt even scratching the surface but these are my main concerns. the other thing is adhd so i have shit work ethic#and a whole slew of negative personality traits that i wont get into but for now its kinda in the air unless smth forces me#im grateful to chipper and bow who've been kind and patient enough to help me by answering my questions and walking me thru#their own processes so i do feel like i can go into it knowing something. there are also some resources online ive found that#give me somewhere to start but the personal risks right now arent smth i can overlook#last summer i was super pumped and committed to trying to get something started but the more i learned the more worried i got#yapping#txt#doodles#sona#puppysona#new sona(???) tentative... im dogy#ask
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Had the extremely upsetting experience of a mutual of like 6 years going off on me for occasionally making posts about supporting Harris because apparently that makes me a g n cide denier who refuses to learn and grow, with all of my views just being assumed not even from what I've told them I believe or what I've posted before, but just because I DON'T post particularly the kind of things they THINK I should be. When I pointed out how much they were just completely assuming about stuff I'd never talked to them about, I was told it doesn't matter what I do in real life or "care" about if I simply disagree with their conclusion and vote for her anyway. Like they were absolutely not sorry for the level of maliciousness they not just assumed of my character, but for some reason thought appropriate to bring directly to me before unfollowing me. No apology whatsoever for how discomforting or upsetting that might be and certainly no acknowledgment that I could disagree with them and still be a good person. I just got another even longer rant about how they fundamentally can't fuck with me because of this one thing, no matter WHAT else I do in my real life (which I pointed out that they do not know), and how I'm directly supporting fascism.
Like seriously what is it about Tumblr that makes people think they know someone based off of occasional posts? There were just such DEEP assumptions they were making of me and going off of very little or absolutely nothing. Around the time I first became mutuals with that person I used to express my personality and beliefs and talk about what was going on in my life a lot more openly, but I've significantly scaled back on doing that in many ways for many reasons. One of my major ones is privacy and the way I've had strangers outside my followers and following circles just find random things I say and dogpile me for it. I was fundamentally changed after some T Fs did that to me like 3 years ago. I also just didn't have many conversations w that person anymore (I message people in general on here like 10x less than I did circa 2018-2019, which I'm somewhat sorry about!). My point is to say I think this person felt comfortable assuming that they knew me, especially who I am in 2024 at the age of 25, much better than they actually did.
One of the specific things they accused me of was being afraid of learning and growing (because I don't perform social media activism on here like they think I should). Like AFRAID to take criticism. When again I've never received criticism from them or had to respond to any criticism on here before as pertaining to my views on... well, absolutely any of the issues they accused me of not caring about. They essentially treated it as if the only thing in the world I cared about was the US election and characterized me as the most out-of-touch liberal they could possibly imagine, because I'm not "pushing" Kamala Harris to be better (Oh?? Should I do that on here?? Does she read my blog??).
And most hypocritically what they said was that I only *sometimes* *vaguely* post pro-Harris things (I often post like 5 or fewer things in a day though?). But here's the kicker. "Because I know I'll get shit for it. And rightfully so."
Really????? Not a single person, anon or not, in my messages or in a tagged post or anything, has ever given me shit before for saying who I'm voting for. I'm actually NOT afraid of "getting shit" for that opinion, I just don't start fights with people who are anti-voting. And why should I??? I genuinely don't believe in trying to change the minds of strangers on the internet about that sort of thing. I'm just not confrontational about it; that is so not the same thing as being "afraid of getting shit." I'm not posting ENOUGH about my support for Harris, therefore I'm afraid. But therefore they can also make all these assumptions about me being their strawman for an ignorant Harris supporter.
I'm afraid of getting shit but I still post anyway? But if I weren't afraid of getting shit I'd be posting a lot more?? This is ALL based on their assumptions of what my blog *should* look like, based on what I really and truly believe. My level of posting every now and then is an accurate gauge of my feelings on complex, sensitive, global issues. Because I'm voting for the Democratic presidential candidate and I'm ok sharing pretty much just that little glimpse of myself.
I really don't think that person knows just how inappropriate and insulting that is to just say all of that to me. Like they really know what's going on in my head. Their first message began and ended with like "I'm sorry I love you I just can't take it anymore" but they clearly weren't sorry enough to try and be more respectful to me, and they didn't love me enough not to default to extremely ungenerous assumptions and attacking me based off of those instead of any actual words I've said that they take issue with.
Online radicalization is real and it's not necessarily bad because your political views can start to fall well out of the contemporary Overton window. The way you find it appropriate to treat people whose views, however common, seem to fundamentally misalign with yours... that does matter. You can't just assume the worst of everyone and then act on that in how you approach them as individuals. And then be shocked that you don't stay friends with them. You can't be confrontational with someone about an issue you've never had an honest conversation about, and then expect them to take your bad faith in them as reasonable well-meaning criticism.
I'm afraid of criticism??? I'm afraid of criticism. No I'm not. This person and I have never had an issue before where they criticized me and I got harshly defensive. It was ALL projection. The entire tone of their messages was as if all their anti-voting posts recently were somehow in communication with the occasional go-vote-for-Harris posts that I make. That's not a conversation. I don't post for your satisfaction. I don't post in "response" to my mutuals I disagree with. I just post what's on my mind, sometimes, about some things. I really again can't stress enough how baffled I am by this
#tales from diana#long post#this is not really a post about voting this is a post about online etiquette#i also remember that this person at one point when we were teenagers had a crush on me#so they might have somewhat idealized me or maybe just had respect for the good times#good conversations we had over the years etc#i still held them in regard even though some of their anti-voting posts i took serious issue w#again i really don't care to argue w ppl against voting bc really i mainly only disagree w that one conclusion#the systemic critiques that were made in those posts i don't think make them bad ppl#i sympathize w why someone might think that way#i just cannot pretend that i think nothing changes if we have dt as president again#i can't act as if im not anxious at the state of the world we're in where we're seriously at risk of that#i don't have that same level of concern about harris. i don't. i don't think theyre the same#i think they diverge in so many meaningful ways but im usually not writing detailed long thoughtful posts about it#do i have to??? for TUMBLR?? id rather not...#but i don't wish to be confronted as if these are nuances i MUST not hold in my opinion#can't stress enough they were basically calling me a g n cide denier like that's just a cool ok thing to do#i have literally never made a post about ppl not voting for harris bc of the war in gaza#i specifically haven't not because im 'afraid' but bc i don't believe in comparing those 2 things#there was gonna be a presidential election this year anyway and there does not have to be this war#if u think dems aren't doing well enough on the war for u to vote for them. i can't argue w u#but i was always going to vote anyway#again im afraid of getting shit?? ONLY this person has EVER given me shit until now#im not pushing harris enough? how tf do u know that? bc im not reblogging ill-informed posts from ppl like u?#im not PUSHING this woman running for president enough bc im not writing critical posts she and her advisers will never see#about how im threatening to withhold my vote from them. something id never honestly do considering the opposition#they kept stressing to me to about how they weren't a trump supporter when *i* never said as much to them#i do agree that not voting for harris 'supports' trump in that it benefits him overall#but i don't attack ppl who just aren't voting in that way. ok?#damn i hate being on the defensive like this
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#just needed to vent for a sec but oh god am i tired of people#'friends' both irl and online got me fucked up lately#mental healths been in the shitter almost nonstop this year#familys always got me up the wall#i just feel like I'm constantly treading water and i am *tired*. like so fucking TIRED#it's never enough; it's too much; no not like that; but not that either; it's all wrong wRoNg WrOnG#ik im sleep deprived and possibly pms-y and that is most certainly not helping things rn but...#gods i see less and less of a reason to get out of bed and bother with anything ever again#wtf is the purpose#i can't keep friends to save my life bc im apparently a fuckin doormat and interesting as unflavored rice or smth#how hard is it to feel like you maybe sorta kinda matter and aren't an unlovable worthless piece of shit#years of therapy; trying meds; everything under the sun.... and nothing. lows and highs and dips of every kind and yet ..nothing#and maybe im just very much in my feelings rn and just yelling into the void.. but it hurts and im tired of pretending it doesn't.#i hate how hard it is to make friends as an adult especially irl. and how gossipy and cliquey and gross and mean ppl can be#of getting called childish and naive and boring for wanting to be a decent person and having interests outside of partying#(not attacking those traits but tired of getting attacked for *not* being 'fun' enough or 'social' enuf or 'sensitive' for having feelings)#enough*#i just want to go eat drywall and stand in the rain and let it help me pretend im not crying blood rn.#like every cell in my body isn't trying to spontaneously combust.#'it gets better' ..yeah? when. when i was 14? when i was 23? when im 37? when im 55? 82? WHEN.. bc im so sick and tired#and no this isn't me writing a final note or whatever it sounds like; i just wanted to word vomit bc ive never been good w sadness#and ive got such an overwhelming amount of it rn i can't even turn it into anger & spite & use that for productivity... i just want to rot#to lie down and be covered by plants as i sleep and just slowly fade into a cloud or smth like it's a ghibli movie or wtv.#im like shaking from how stupidly emotional i feel rn. the lack of empathy these days is fuckin astounding#common sense & empathy are lacking in absolutely droves these days. some days i hate the internet & tech for its irreparable damages sm#but here we are and here it shall remain. long after us; and *long* after us ..... *sigh*#anyway ima go try to take a nap or smth. I'll see ya when i see ya. take care my lovelies#if u read all this i prob owe you a cookie lol
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...I can't believe I have to say this, but I'm allowed to ban people from my server that trigger other members that are survivors of SA and CSA by blatantly consuming and promoting that sort of content. And I'm allowed to personally block people for whatever reason I wish. Especially if they are putting minor sim characters in sexual poses, posting sexual content on their simblr untagged that allows minors to follow for their cc, and liking posts that call me slurs and tell me to kill myself. If you're someone that's hurt over that and think it's talking bad about you as a person for people to openly not be comfortable with that, you need to grow up. Actually follow the tenants of the "dead dove" concept you're an apparent enthusiast of by tagging your fetish content and keeping it away from minors, and temper some of the terrible aspects of your personality. You'll have less trouble in the future.
#ceci speaks#nonsims#text#tw csa mention#tw sa mention#no im not naming you because youre not worth my time attention or advertisement#and no im not acknowledging this further#im in mourning and have far more to pay attention to than your discord drama#bad faith arguments do not deserve my time#i cant believe i even have to say this shit#i was going to post the screenshots and all that shit and name you but frankly also#a) i dont think you can handle that since you seem like such a fragile person and im concerned for your mental health#and b) i dont want to further trigger myself by going through all that shit again#so hopefully this is explanation enough for why i 'dont like you'#its not even dislike i just want you far far away from me and my spaces online#i wish you the best and hope you can get some help
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Every time one of y’all say Phil is Autistic, I lose another five years of my life.
#iM nOt diAgNoSiNg HiM#but like you are#it’s horrendous enough people self diagnosis#but now y’all are guessing whether a curiated personality that we have momentary glimpses of gives you the right to even consider a#diagnosis as severe as autism#the tiktok and tumblification of Autism angers me every single time I see it#send hate all you want but I can say with full confidence 90% of self diagnosed autism really have just some combination of social anxiety#and adhd mixed with introvertedness#or just plain social anxiety#the amount of times I’ve seen people online describe their symptoms and it’s legit the criteria for social anxiety#if you don’t know why I feel so strong about it#my brother was actually autistic like for realizes#as in he didn’t talk as a kid and I’m not sure if I’ll have to care for him when my parents die#and it’s half the reason I’m#or was and still partly super fucked up#this kind of shit is for twitter#rae’s rambles#dan and phil
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it kind of bothers me that witcher fans don’t really unite under sapkowski’s name like other fans of fantasy authors do (e.g. “tolkien fans”).
in practically any other fandom of fantasy books, save for the particularly rancid authors known for their disappointing and shameful behavior or views (e.g. jk r*wling), it’s just regular business to say the author’s name. but sapkowski’s name is treated like a dirty word in the witcher fandom, for really no good reason…
it must be asked — what is stopping us from doing so?! why don’t we call ourselves sapkowski fans. it would be much easier than saying “i’m a fan of the witcher, but only the books, i don’t consider the various adaptations canon, etc. etc.” … “half a hundred words, when three are enough!!”
#i was just thinking about this today. can we call ourselves andrzej sapkowski fans beginning now or what#note that i said GOOD reason#meaning that it’s not like sapkowski is a conservative#the witcher books#txt#like sapkowski has done and said stuff that i dont approve of or like#the alcoholism at cons for instance hem hem (though ive also heard that type of behavior was standard)#he’s said a few cringey things about women and lesbians but nothing worse than your typical old guy would#specifically i’m referring to the ‘i dont hate women i - he he he - positively love them!’ which is actually just everybodys granddad lmao#and the ‘i dont know about why my characters are lesbians - though i can be sure im not one’#that kind of stuff just makes me shake my head and laugh#but its not like he has done heinous shit like some of these authors running around loose out here#i mean i think it’s mitigated in part that he’s a private person with no twitter account#i also disgaree with his points from there is no gold in gray mountains but i also dont know enough abt what hes talking about to understand#understand FULLY at least. i understand some but not all. i think i understand just enough to disagree#but he has expressed a lot of progressive points which also come through in his series#what i mean is: hes not a terrible person. so why do people act like he is#ALSO i think if we united under his name then there would be more inter-series fans#ive always wondered where the fans of the hussite trilogy are (online). is there an online fanbase?#and if we do that then we can get more and better translations hopefully#like theres still no official translations for a ton of his short stories
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i wonder if there's the potential for a solution to the doxxing fucking over marginalized people specifically thing and/or the some people only being able/knowing where to engage with community online thing if we we were able to like. weaponize the relative lack of actual anonymity in the opposite direction.
like for one thing, instead of doxxing just resulting in problems from others in person, using that information to actively support the person instead, and for another for the other potentially more targeted use of the internet to find people to engage with in person (although that one you'd have to be even more careful about in case it worked in the opposite direction. I'm just thinking it would be nice to have something more structured/widespread than happening to find out your internet friends are in your local area, that could potentially be used to circumvent people not meeting in third spaces/other issues people have initially finding local community in person.)
It would be nice if instead of exclusively finding offline solutions/telling people how to be more careful we could also use what's often part of the problem to our advantage when it does happen. Like, having a way to address it that isn't only preventative.
#no idea whether it's actually practical im essentially just thinking outloud#if we could have another pokemon go thing where people have the opportunity to#encounter each other on a friendly basis in person because of their phones that would also be nice#idk how you'd do some of this in a way that's actually 'safe' though#mypost#the doxxing response thing would have to be either like. a general cultural shift which is probably very unlikely#or a targeted attempt to support people affected that extends to their local area#and the other would kind of just require people to be fine with telling people online roughly where they are it seems like#unless there's some additional vetting process or something you could use first#which would obviously have a bunch of risks + more for some people than others#but like. part of my personal situation re online safety#is that a. i've already been on here and posting shit since i was a younger teen#and it would be practically impossible to make my normal social media doxx-proof to begin with#and b. none of my political opinions or me being trans or anything are exactly a secret in person#so anything someone could try to harass me with in person would either be trying to just like. embarass me in general i guess (useless)#telling people something they already know (also useless)#lying (could cause mostly temporary problems with the wrong person at most)#swatting (okay yeah this one could cause problems if they're stupid enough#to fall for it but also i don't really think there's anything to be done about it)#or other threats to my physical safety (people can do that anyway considering how outwardly visible i am about my#opinions/being trans/etc + that would require them to be in my phsyical proximity as well)#so basically my threat model for internet security is way more lax on General Social Media than a lot of people would think it should be#and i've used the same url for events i've attended in person#but considering that people could definitely find me if they really wanted one way or the other + there's nothing really. secret? on here.#like. there's stuff i wouldn't randomly bring up in conversation but none of this is something i'm actively hiding really#and then if there's something i do want to use the internet for but want to keep Secret secret from my irl identity#that's just a whole different account that i'm creating#tldr you can't realistically intimidate me by threatening to reveal information that's already public knowledge#i guess maybe once i move i'll have to reconsider whether i want to try a new threat model since some of the infomation people would be abl#to get easily would be outdated but i also almost prefer it to stay mostly a moot point so people can't effectively use it as leverage
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in the uncomfortable situation of having drawn a lot of art of characters that belong to a person that i want nothing to do with anymore. it's frustrating bc a lot of these pieces are also stuff that i'm proud of, skill-wise, but they are essentially tainted now. they will always remind me of who i drew it all for. but i also hate the idea of essentially throwing paintings into a digital fire.
#i havent even deleted the posts i have of them but that's moreso bc it is very painful to look back on them now#seeing our interactions in the notes or captions...i don't even want to look at it#i think that if this person was still able to go online i would just push through it and delete them all#but they will not have internet access for a very long time fucking hopefully#and there's just smthn abt knowing that they do not have any way to contact me or see any of my posts#that makes things feel like they are just in limbo#idk has anyone ever been in a situation like this? im just at a loss#cannot emphasize enough that this was not caused by petty drama or stupid internet fights#the things they did and the reasons i cut them off are some of the most serious shit i have ever had to deal with#and i will never be able to think abt them the same way again#textphelia
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Abandonment issues suck so much ass dude. I spend every moment afraid of you leaving me but i cant tell you that or you'll be disgusted and leave me anyways. every other person that could potentially give you more of what i have is a threat. i have to give you what you want from me otherwise you will leave me. you don't love me. you love me so much and that's my fault. you love me because you are a Good Person. you only love me out of obligation and one day it will be too much for you. You Are A Good Person.
#sorry. having another normal one#cicadas vent tag#delete later#all of my dreams lately have been about my online friends talking shit about me#i know its stupid#i know im supposed to take people at their word#and you have no reason to lie to me#Yall Are Good People#but. but#maybe you do only love me out of obligation#maybe you only love me because my mental state would crumble without it and you feel like you have to#there's no way of proving if you do or not#this feeling has been haunting me for weeks im so fucking sick of it dude#and this post is still sanitized. theres still more t it i just. its already long enough#and i dont want to seem like a shitty person#or a shitty friend#sorry#im sorry
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mspaint fanart of this fucked up xuppu plush i found on google
#i dragged my discord server into watching all of miraculous and god its jsut. such a show#the show is infinitely entertaining bc theres so much enjoyment i get laughing at how much of a mess it is#and theres still enough actual good stuff where its like yea im here for a reason#the jarring tonal shifts#the occasional janky animation#the infinite refusal to change the status quo too much (that is changing some this season but its still funny to me)#the show is clumsy. thats how id describe it.#i dont hate it. i fucking love it. i love it cuz its sometimes shit. i love it cuz it shows promise for a few seconds and then does a 180#anyways i got distracted. point is that in our server weve decided to roleplay.as the kwamis. as a bit#they dont really have personalities but they DO have a bunch of absolute beasts of plushies n stuff online for pfps#we cant stop laughing at the fuckign xuppu one. why he look like that. look at him.#im not gonna actually tag this as miraculous bc i dont want people to bash me for my takes here in the tags.#if u like the show thats epic more power to you#i just am infinitely fascinated by it#and i have a very low bar for what gets me to laugh when im with my friends . this show is unintentionally the funniest shit ever#art#text#xuppu
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