#ill try to have fun tho ^-^ and like i said ill try and doodle stuff for u guys while im gone

[oh-gh0st]

stuff is all packed see u guys in 4 days

[bentosandbox]

hell yea comics. 10, 23, 30, 40, 41 if you like

10. How do you decide what to write?

A little parasite in my brain says hmm today i will do thing and i just roll with the cringe

23. What’s a trope, AU, or concept you’ve never written, but would like to?

omegaverse i think it'd be extra fun when it's 2 emotionally constipated office workers vs a pairing like texlapp whoa who said that does 'daydreamed and doodled a bit but didn't start on anything solid yet' count as never written if yes its then wuxia AU where chen and lin switch places kinda (basically want to extrapolate that part in chen's op rec where the rat king invited her underground)

30. Have you ever written something that was out of your comfort zone? If so, what was it, and how did it affect your approach to writing fic thereafter?

this chen and hoshi one technically but also the chen and swire one that i still havent posted in english so sorryyyyy (i wrote them at the same time iirc.. just didnt have time to draw the second one until later)

first time i forced myself to write internal monologues AND angst in an actual script on google docs instead of just dumping lines i want characters to say in my own discord server channel shoutout to my friend who gassed me up with the comments they left on the doc lmao 'damn i wanna make the angsty af introspective comics i always see' > 'wait damn i have to make it myself fawjkkkkkkkk'

idk if it affected my approach because the Very Serious chen and Lin character study comic i had planned ended up being a shitposty copybook so i went back to my old style of smashing dialogue in a notepad (if the anon that sent the ask about this comic sees this sorry i got cold feet and i still havent exported it out of my tablet)

40. Do you tend to reread fics or are you a one-and-done kind of person?

we don't have a choice do we...

i did just reread the fic i mention below tehe i do reread CN fics way more because sometimes ill be lazy and read it through machine translate while other times i'll sit down and try to translate it (in my head) while EN fics have an easier time searing into my mind

41. Link a fic that made you think, “Wow, I want to write like that.”

its not cheating right

fr tho to write fever dream-esque(?) scenarios that end in girlfail...!!

ok the chenswire one aside the nearl one is also a favourite something about looking at the tired human through the chinks in the infallible knight's armor

[emerxshiu]

kirby doodle dump (+ some small animation tests)

(this one from today) this dude lives rent free in my head, still trying to make his gijinka more interesting, i dunno, also trying to draw other types of hair, mainly curly (main reason i even wanted to change the one i had) here im just practicing, hold on im rambling and going in cir- next

remember last post when i said i was gonna drop some kirby doodles but choose to draw other stuff instead, from this one to down, these are those doodles. i scrambled to search for my crayons but i coulnt find my blues and purples, and also my pink, at least i have the others. sometimes i get the need to draw with stuff like that, im thinking about buying pastels, i rlly like the art i see with them, but im afraid i might not like using them that much and end up wasting money, it has happened quite a few times with stuff like acrylics.

he will.

welp, already knew abt the story, i just bought deluxe for the epilogue (fun fact, rtdldeluxe released on the 24 of february (if i remember correctly) two days before my birthday, needles to say i ate good that day (and also because the sploon3 dlc would drop two days later too) i also have a exclusive rtdldx poster for the pre-order :3 )

aaand then i procrastinated it and basically took up almost a year to finish the main mode and magoland missions, then beat magolor epilogue in like 4 hours, already kinda talked abt magolor epilogue in another post so basically, loved it, wish there was more stages there or to be abe to even further upgrade abilities.

rn im doing extra mode (a bit reluctant because im only doing it for the 100%) not rlly liking that mode a lot, but its ok, bad thing is that ill have to do the true missions in magoland, its gonna be a pain

first i was gonna make it a gijinka, but i didnt like how it was turning out so i did it with normal kirbs, i think it was suppossed to have some inplied kirfluff, i forgor

the grimm reaper and loaf, felt way too lazy to do fluff too so he's just there with the text, i love epic yarn so much, i have tried emulating it but it either requieres me to have a wii remote or runs like absolute shit. im thinking about someday getting a 3ds, not just for epic yarn, robobot, triple deluxe and also because i always wanted to try flipnote (it seems cool!) but that is if im lucky enough to find them at a good condition and affordable price

digital doodle instead, was gonna make an animation but got too lazy, im so inconsistent with my shading

i did make this animation, its more of a test, but it didnt work out that well

i do have this silly one tho

Jambuhbye!

[ryker-writes]

congrats on 1.2k! id like to get a twst matchup if that's okay!

i don't have any preferences appearance wise or anything, im just curious who ill get! personality wise i'm very shy with new people and kind of passive, im very socially awkward, but in less crowded situations i talk more, and i talk a lot if someone mentions my interests. once i get close to someone i'm very. out there. i get loud and kind of annoying, and i joke around a ton, but i can be serious and caring when needed. i have frequent mood swings based off small things, but i bounce back pretty easy. i also have a bit of a temper sometimes. i'm hyperactive and fidget a lot too, whether it's doodling, picking at my nails, etc.

i like going out and doing fun things cuz i get bored sitting doing the same stuff for awhile. i like to draw, i enjoy musical theatre, uhh i like to play rock instruments and sing sometimes. i also love cute things and sweets. i dislike people who are rude for no reason, uhh certain veggies (cuz of texture, especially cooked veggies), large gatherings and working food service. i don't like much athletic stuff either, but games are fun sometimes.

love language wise i mostly do quality time and sometimes acts of service, but i enjoy receiving pretty much anything, but especially physical touch. sorry for the lengthy paragraph lol, take your time!

Thank you anon! No need to apologize for the length, the more info I have, the better!

"Another anon in my little matchmaking event? How lovely! Welcome in and take a seat! I've read your information and I wanted to share your results! I'll be honest, at first I tossed around the ideas of Idia or Rook, but they didn't quite fit right. But then I found him, your match!

The old fae general, Lilia, would be better for you!"

Like I said, I tossed around the idea of Rook and Idia for your introvertedness but also joking around when you're close with people and the temper sometimes. But there were little things that just made me think they didn't fit right in my mind so I continued searching through the characters. Then I remembered Lilia and was like omg he's perfect!

Lilia actually works very well regardless if you're shy and quiet around him or more loud and out there!

he likes all sides of you! Even when you have mood swings he loves you

he doesn't mind your fidgeting as long as it isn't something that will hurt you

he loves to go out with you so much!

he'll take you on random adventures all the time so you're always trying new things with Lilia

pls doodle him

he won't ask for it but he'd love it so much if you did and will give you the happiest little grin

he also loves to play rock instruments and sing so he'd love to do it with you!

but if you want him to just listen he's happy to do that too!

he tries to take your food preferences into account when he cooks...it still tastes horrible though

good luck with that

Quality time works great with Lilia! In all his years of life he's learned to treasure time more with the people he loves and that includes you

he's big on physical touch tho so you will be showered in affection a lot of the time

[lostacelonnie]

The dreaded time returns once again. I hope your first day back wasnt bad. Oh hell yeah peak fuck it we ball right there. & its always nice to have the support system. Oh yeah mt fuji is on my list too i wanna see it. Also id love to see the native birds. Love seein different types of birds. Oh okay words not commonly used bein dropped got it. Occasionally annoying is like the catchphrase of the english language. Oh yeah big same 80 is like my max comfort level for heat before it becomes unbearable. So 42c was like death it sucked so bad. Thanks! I also finally got through jarilo-vi story & playstation beta version opened to test so hopefully soon ill be able to play there. Mobile is hard to play on. Very nice i should check out rain world see what its like. I need to set aside time to draw its a relaxing hobby. I feel that i keep dropping games for a bit. Now that im all caught up on genshin again im trying to play more dredge & river city girls. Maybe even beat them. I wish you luck in your minecraft quest. Fair enough. I get along okay with my half sister but not enough to like. Tell her things. Oh hell yeah congrats on the dye job done. Always feels good. Yeehaw new game mode. Star rail is doin good at havin fun & interesting side stuff to do really. I got so many facts about fish & birds & such in my head at all times but can i remember all of them all the time? No. Such is life with adhd

it really does. but hey i survived the first week AND made friends with the cool alt girls from my class so its not ryover 👍and yeah i was. actually quite surprised how chill my mom is with me being queer but im not complaining. and yeah definitely!!! i dont rlly know a lot about birds but i agree its always nice to see them. and yeah isnt it!!!! tho Being Polish kinda desensitized me to languages being annoying since it is like that as well. while i do operate my mother language quite well, i cannot remember a Single grammar rule ive ever learned. just freestyle it and hope for the best. what the fuck is a przydawka. and ough congrats on surviving that then. im going to alicante with my school pretty soon [mightve mentioned this but i dont remember?] and from what we know its going to be like 25c there and like. damn. here i was getting happy about not having to deal with the heat until the next vacation. but Whatever. AND AHH THATS NICE!! id love to hear ur thoughts on the story i honestly Really like the jarilo vi arc. mobile IS hard to play on. survive out there. RAIN WORLD IS SO GOOD OMG THE GRAPHICS AND STORY ARE AMAZING AND ALL THE DIFFERENT SLUGCATS ARE SO FUN TO PLAY AS...... and ah good luck with that!! i have a little less time now that school is back but ive been trying to at least doodle every day. and ooh i dont recognize either of those, tell me ab them!! i did the genshin archon quest and havent logged in since but it was very fun. excited for the next part. and thank you o7 ill keep you updated on that. and yeah i feel you on that i have a pretty similar relationship with mine, its just that we rarely ever talk. AND THANK YOU!! im probably gonna repeat it soon since, as i said, dye doesnt really like to cooperate with me so its basically gone by now but at least i know this dye stays for at least a bit. i havent played star rail recently aside from the main quest tbh, didnt really have the motivation to do it i guess. BUT i heard the new simulated universe is fun so ill probs check it out Eventually. and yeah it really IS like that

[cozycornerwritings]

hi!! for the match up thing i’m indian-american, 5’6”-5’8” naturally rapunzel-length, wavy hair (brownish), glasses, brown eyes, corner dimples, aquarius, i’m an ambivert, i love video games, editing, reading, writing, sleeping lol, and i’m not good at drawing but i like doodles and coloring. i love k-pop (casual listener) and some non-kpop songs & i love watching a lot of anime & reading BL 🕴🏻 & manga. i get closed off in groups because i get anxious and i get negative thoughts and how i’m probably not even wanted there bc of bad experiences. in public i can get suuuper anxious because i’m rlly sheltered bc of my parents and i get all shaky. same like in public w/o my parents like i get shaky and an anxiety / panic attack and want to cry. ive never experienced things bc of my family like ‘normal’ stuff like the beach, traveling, ice skating, movie theaters and stuff. i hate it and i dont have the best relationship with my family they can be really toxic sometimes and the whole anxiety thing and that makes me feel really depressive and su*cidal sometimes for a while. i love physical affection and being shown that or told words affirmation. but irl i get awkward and shy w physical affection bc ive never experienced it and idk how to do it. im good thru text, irl i can keep a convo going. thru calls i get shy and nervous, especially if it’s the opposite gender. my face gets red easily like i blush a lot and it’s not hard to make me flustered lol. when i get like that or don’t know how to respond i just giggle bc idk what to do or say. if im sad and going thru it i make jokes to cover it up and laugh it off, one time someone just asked ‘are you ok’ after i did and my voice cracked ‘no not really’ and i started crying 😃 i keep stuff to myself (unless i trust that person to tell them stuff nd open up to them) i do have trust issues and i’ve never rlly had friends irl my parents are strict and never let me go out. online i dont rly have much friends either. im rlly observant, and like descriptive / detailed as u can tell 😭 kinda sucks thoo because a lot of people don’t read what i say bc they said they cant b bothered n it’s too long but i just get rlly engrossed into things & dont half-ass stuff and just wanna explain everything properly 😭 i can be sassy and give attitude, and i can be mean. BUT i never do that to someone unless they did me dirty. i dont like arguing. that side of me can be shown thru arguments but only again like if the other person is doing the same and is being mean and disrespectful to me first. i do have a lot of patience and endure things until it’s become like a problem? i make sure to communicate. i never ignore people, i’m not petty unless i have a good reason if they did something to me. i’m really funny i swear 😭 and i can be emotional / sensitive depending on what it is but i know when someone is joking but i know when things are taken too far and i have boundaries. i take caution when meeting people bc trust issues so i’m not that clingy unless i 100% like can count on them and comfortable with them trust them etc. i like teasing friends but just for fun and won’t take it far and make them upset or anything. if i ever hurt someone which i make sure not to i feel super bad and apologize a lot and make sure to never do it again. i try to keep my cool to refrain keeping myself from getting mad but the times i have gotten mad are reasonable and it has to be something super upsetting for me, i dont get mad w/o reason though and i start to angry-cry and yell but i try not to say anything that ill regret and make sure to think of what im saying. i love memes, idk how to describe my humor tho 😭, i’m diligent and considerate! i try to show i care thru actions and words of affirmation and quality time etc. i make sure to remember important stuff someone tells me abt themselves. i have a really good memory i don’t forget things that easily. i care for others a lot and im trying to take care of myself more now too but it can be hard. i’m not a liar i can be really blunt and honest. SORRY ITS LONG 😭

I match you with..

Lemillion!

I’m a firm believer that understanding opposites can bring out the best in each other. Mirio helps you come out of your shell. He loves to stroke your hair, and sometimes playfully pulls it. He is your partner and your best friend, so doing thinks like Pictionary or playing games today are a common occurrence. Joking and cuddling turns into a must for the two of you and you discover how much you love your head pet. His dependable personality provides a safe place for you, and you get the chance to trust in someone fully.

He appreciates how you are careful to watch how you act when you are upset, but loves how full of emotion you are. Seeing you cry breaks him on the inside and he just wants to scoop you up into hugs. Knowing that you have that big goof there helps you with your social anxiety. If someone is talking too much to you and he sees you getting overwhelmed, he will skillfully direct conversation away from you. Mirio gets very protective of you around your family. He constantly holds your hand and you two have established a safe word in case you want to leave. Mirio is more than happy to scoop you into his arms and run away with you. He is so emotionally intelligent and sensitive with you that you feel so safe and secure. If you could use one word to describe him it would be ‘home’. For the first time in a long time you begin to realize what family is, it’s mirio.

Knowing that you haven’t tried many things, you two make an effort to try new experiences together. He often flirts with you, despite the fact you two are together. He brings out the more sexual side of you. You compliment him and flatter him. He loves how much you appreciate him. You two take care of each other and your time is full of laughs.

[applegelstore]

Hey! Just wanted to drop by and say I really love your art and seeing your content! Along with the ideas you speak of sometimes. It's so nice to see because it looks like you enjoy what you do. It's an inspiration, really. I also wanted to ask, what's your inspiration? And what keeps you motivated? And this next one might be a bit personal, but do you have moments of self doubt? How do you deal with it?

Hi! First of all, thanks a lot for the ask, I don’t get personal questions about my art very often, so it’s very cool to see that some people are actual people and not porn bots, and are actually interested in the things I post!

Now for the actual ask, which I’ll totally have to divide into parts. I’ll also set a cut because it got hella long. Now, let’s go!

I have a very bad habit of word vomiting whenever I post art. It’s not only ever since I’ve started binge drawing Zesty fanart, I’ve pretty much always been like this ever since I started posting art on the internet about… 12 years ago at the very least?It used to be a lot of musing about the art itself (like, “what do you think, should I have tried this or that?” or “I had trouble with this thing” or “I actually like how whatever turned out”), which is probably due to the fact that teenage me had still a lot to learn and wasn’t afraid to admit that and ask for advice. I mostly posted my art online to get some peer advice.Nowadays, I am still aware of my shortcomings, but I don’t talk about the technical aspects of my art that often anymore. Nowadays, I have two reasons for posting art online: 1) I’m trying to make a living out of this shit, so naturally I’m trying to make as many people as possible aware of the fact that I exist. 2) I just wanna talk about the thing ™. Honestly. Never underestimate either of these points. That’s why there’s very often so much text and ranting in the tags. Because. I. want. to. talk. about. the. thing. I have an unholy amount of sticky notes on my desktop with ideas of things I’d either like to do because I think it would be subjectively cool, or because it might be a good addition to my portfolio. (spoilers: the former usually gets done like a decade earlier)I’m very glad that the sparks fly over and it shows that I love the things I love! ♥The result is novel-length descriptions for single sketches and tag vomit, though, lol.

“I also wanted to ask, what’s your inspiration?”

There’s no easy answer to that. First of all, it sounds a bit as if I was actively looking for inspiration. Which I am not. As I said, I rather have too many ideas and end up scrapping an unholy amount because even if I only do doodle shitpost sketches there’s no way I can do it all in a lifetime. I don’t know whether you had been implying that I actively look for inspiration or not, but if you did, let me tell you that I don’t. If you didn’t mean to imply that, no harm done.However, that doesn’t mean I don’t GET any. Because of course I get my inspiration from all kinds of places. I don’t watch a lot of movies, but I love going to the cinema and hearing the sounds and get eye candy (I love epic shots with the camera panning over landscapes and cool action scenes. Also, go watch The Secret of Kells, everyone). I always come out of blockbuster movies feeling like I wanna do something epic, too. I always listen to a whole lot of music, too, and there’s way too many songs that make me want to tell stories, and that plant pictures in the cinema in my head.(there was a time before Tales of Zestiria when I did original art and most of my paintings had some kind of musical inspiration lol. My stories, too).

Then there’s style and subject matter.Style first. I stopped aiming for a specific style pretty early on (like, late teens), and just accepted what came to me and works for me. The result is the weird anime not quite anime semi realism mixture that I have going, and the ratio usually varies depending on what I currently want to do. If I gave you a list of my favorite artists, you’d probably be surprised how little my own art has in common with theirs.Subject matter? WELLLLLL my original stuff comes from what I told you above, additionally, I studied medieval literature for a reason, and I loved mythological tales from my teenage years onwards. I’m much less enthusiastic about them now, but it used to influence my original art for quite a few years.…Also, I obviously like to do fanart. Like, a lot.

Also spoilers: I obviously love Zesty a tiny bit too much, because for no other fandom the streak of fanart has ever been holding up for two years and still counting without an end in sight, and I’ve never come up with any AUs, either. Usually my ideas went straight into original material, and this original material usually got top priority, but here it’s different, and I’m not sure whether it’s a good or a bad thing, haha. So basically don’t wait for my original stories* until I’m either a) done with the Zesty fandom or they’ve united and kicked me out or b) I’ve actually drawn at least four more full scale elaborate illustrations, have created the four or five AUs that I keep doodling for and ranting about, and I have finally run out of steam. Bets are up what happens first.

If you want specifics, it’s always easier to determine inspiration for a particular piece than in general. It can be so many different things.

* Although I still very, very much like some of my ideas and would actually love to do them. I just love to do low-effort Zesty fanart more XD. Shocking! But honestly, I am as surprised as anyone else that my muses shifted as much as they have, and mid-twenties me would never have guessed she’d fall into this rabbit hole in no time…

“And what keeps you motivated?”

I never… really needed to push myself to be motivated. It’s always been intrinsic. I had pictures in my head, I wanted them out. So I had to learn how, and do it. I have ideas in my head. I want to share them. I very much like this thing others have made. I want to tell the entire world how much I love it, so I do by drawing fanart. Simple as that.Positive responses (and asks like this!!) are a great motivator to POST art, but not to DO the art. The latter is intrinsic.Actually, probably TOO intrinsic. Because I keep drawing the things I WANT to draw and not those which would teach me new skills and thus help with “make money with art” thing. So I guess it’s a bit of a mixed bag, haha.I started drawing daily instead of just regularly at some point during my master’s studies, so roughly 8-5 years ago? Whenever I’m on the road or beaten by illness or bad feelings, I sometimes only manage very simple, super bad sketches, but it’s better than nothing. Luckily, it’s not like that every day (still more often that I’d like to, though).

If you’re wondering:Yes, I’ve had artblocks. Usually not in the sense of “I don’t have ideas”, but VERY MUCH in the sense of “I don’t feel like any of the ideas I have right now” and also “nothing I touch turns out the way I want it to turn out”. To all artists out there: it goes away. Believe me. Your stupid period will be over next week (to the guys out there: that’s not a joke. It DOES affect my general condition). It will be better the moment YOU feel better from whatever you’re currently suffering from.Yes, I’ve also scrapped ideas not because I didn’t like them after all, but because I tried and just failed repeatedly at executing them. Yes, I’ve had such bad times in life that I didn’t want to do ANYTHING. That included art. I just. didn’t. want. to. do. anything. Sometimes I still have these phases, but at least it no longer lasts for months straight without break.

“And this next one might be a bit personal, but do you have moments of self doubt?”

Pfft. Of course. Show me an artist who hasn’t. I’ve learned by now that you can acquire every skill you want. The question is whether you have the time and the will for it. If I had started drawing daily much earlier in life, and if I’d practiced more of the things I’m not good at instead of doodle shitposting, I’d be at an ENTIRELY DIFFERENT level than I am now. Even if I had STILL studied what I studied as I did (as I said, medieval literature, nothing art related). I’ve been drawing ever since I could hold a pencil and my parents have always been supportive, so that wasn’t a problem, I just wasn’t aware all these years that it could be something future me might want. Past me couldn’t have KNOWN. It’s okay, in a way. I can do the things I WANT to do by now. Not always as majestically as the ideas deserve, but it does the job. I don’t need to be able to do hyper realistic portraits, or hyper detailed interiors of space ships, for example. (it would be cool to be able to draw musical instruments tho. I’d love to learn 2D animation, too, but WHEN??) In short, am I aware that I’m not god and that my skills are limited in comparison to many other artists? Yes. Is that a problem? No.Do I doubt whether I can do my job, though? Very much yes. Because successful freelance artists don’t only need skill, they need to sell themselves, and I suck at that most epically. Do I miss the times when I didn’t even think about becoming better but simply drew for fun? Pretty much, yeah. Do I miss the times when I still had the ability to concentrate on elaborate, large paintings? Yes, I do. But I can’t turn my brain back to 10 year old. So I’ll have to deal with what I have now.

If you’re wondering whether I had moments of self doubt about my ideas, then, yes, very super much yes. I am convinced that the things you produce should be what YOU want to see. I want to draw what I want and tell the stories I WANT TO SEE AND READ. As I said, I’m doing it because I want these things to exist. Does it still hurt if nobody else likes these ideas? Yes, yes it does very much. It’s not even that I start thinking my ideas were bad, but that I start thinking “Nobody understands me and nobody will ever be able to like me because they don’t like my ideas, and my ideas are part of me”. Which is true, but it is ALSO true that you do not have to like every single idea some other person has to like them or be friends with them, I am aware of that, but if I may be honest here, it’s still a thought that I can’t quite get rid of, and still gets me angsty whenever I share some of my story ideas with anyone.

“How do you deal with it?”

I don’t. Ahem. Truth be told, I never really developed a proper coping mechanism for failures, and I don’t exactly like that about myself, but I still haven’t found a proper solution. As much as I stress that I do the things I do because I actually want to, I also told you that it scares me to see people disagreeing. It’s not only art related, whenever I feel I messed something up (school ie. marks, socialisation, whatever), it eats at me for days or even weeks until something positive happens (like, better marks, a compliment, anything). I don’t really like it, mostly because it starts a vicious cycle, but that’s how it is. I had surprisingly little problems with that during my university years because I had good marks, but I still mess up at least 50% of all the social interaction I do. It’s not always that easy with art, either.Story time.I remember one conversation with an artist who’s teaching art classes at my (ex) university, like, portrait drawings and flower paintings. So at some point when I started trying to live on art, I asked her whether she’d be interested in offering classes for other art styles as well, like comic drawing classes. She said she’d be interested, so I wanted to talk to her in person, but she never replied to that email reply. I decided to be bold for once, grabbed my portfolio, and went to her after one of her classes to show her what I’m doing. Put on the spot, she admitted that she didn’t reply any further because she didn’t like what I was doing. It was good from a technical aspect, but it seemed dull and uninspired to her, like something she had seen too many times already.I was devastated.I’ve always had to deal with underwhelming responses from peers and friends, too, but I also got some really sweet reactions and genuine support, so it was kind of a mixed bag, overall. I wasn’t used to that kind of harsh rejection of who I am.

Am I also very, VERY petty and jealous? Hell, yes. I get VERY jealous whenever I see people whose art is on my level or below but they still manage to make money with it, and have 10-100 times the amount of followers I have and/or get more enthusiastic responses online. It just makes me angry. The only way of coping I’ve ever found is stay the fuck away. I KNOW that it’s not these people’s fault if I’m jealous, and goddamn, freelance artist life is hard enough as it is. We don’t need to tear other apart. Surely they worked their asses off to be where they are. Heck, I’m friends with some. I keep away from those people so I can calm down and stop being angry, before I start lashing out at artists just because they get the attention they need and deserve. It’s not THEIR fault that I need money and also reassurance.

The only thing that ever worked for me to overcome any of these issues is just continue nevertheless. Keep doing what you’re doing. Remember what you love and why and JUST KEEP DOING IT. Even if you don’t see the point right now. Chances are you will see that point again. Maybe you never will. But IF you ever do, you want to make damn sure that you didn’t drop the ball in the meantime. There’s that saying that you can lose if you fight, but you can’t win if you never fight. It’s true. Be stubborn and show the world your middle finger.Spoilers: I’m teaching comic style drawing classes for the “rivaling” institute now. Always only in super small groups and it’s badly paid, so I don’t know for how long I’ll be able to keep it up, but it’s a start, right?

I hope that answered your questions!

Last remark: always remember, kids: you HAVE to produce the content you want to see yourself. Nobody is gonna do it for you unless you pay them. So. I’m doing it. Against better judgment, lol.…and watch The Secret of Kells.

[chimerabal]

Enter Player 5

Got a new character during the second half of the campaign today *confetti*, and hoo man what a Wild Fucking Ride. Wow.

Last session we defeated the Big Bad demon leader of the cult we were investigating, and got sent back to Thraben for two weeks of downtime between missions. The party is staying in a church compound, the characters all have these apartment rooms they’re chillin’ in, and were given an initial week of time to do whatever. 

Sibyl spent the better part of her time decoding The Book she carries; a bible loaded with coded scribbles added in by a party unknown to me. She made some good progress, which the content of is also.... unknown to me. Proud of her though! She also built a flying contraption that makes both Uriel and myself turn green with envy- quit being cool. Mikela took time to write to her family and had a heart to heart with a priest over her moral dilemmas. She also took the time to visit our werewolf Katya, played by the dm, and her younger sister to escort them on the town for a relaxing pub visit (as the church keeps them locked away unless escorted- being werewolves and all). Fun bonding happened over Mikela’s unwillingness to drink, and Katya’s jovial insistence on having a beer. 

The merriment was cut short very abruptly when Katya recognized a group of rangers in the crowd from her Past- and they recognized her. They got in her face about being a werewolf bold enough to come into the city- Mikela got into the ranger’s faces about being pricks- a ranger got into the younger sister’s face wiTH A KNIFE. Things escalated very- Very quickly. Mikela and the younger sister were brought out of the pub, leaving Katya wildly outnumbered in the pub. Mikela was able to overtake the one dude outside. Inside, Katya transformed FULL WOLF (just out of view, awww) and started kicking serious ass. Some thugs left the pub to attack the sister; Mikela decided that Katya had it handled and they fled. While fleeing they ran into a high ranking church knight and a crew of guards, who recognized Mikela’s regalia and they helped end the conflict (barely, Wolf!Katya had it handled and all they really did was get her to a hospital post fight). The knight turned out to be canon character Thalia, the Guardian of Thraben. Mikela and Thalia had a good heart to heart, knight to knight, chat- however the whole ordeal still left Mikela exhausted (probably doubly so with how many ‘I told you so’s were thrown her way over taking the werewolf for a walk :T overall NPCs were understanding tho).

((Per the norm, if Uriel wasn’t involved I was probably zoning in and out, there may be missed events, lmao, I try.))

Uriel started their week by trying to get as many resources from the armory as possible, and making a guard Actually Ill by describing scaberen stuff. Very successful. Couldn’t secure a room with a bathtub though. The better part of their time was building scaabs, and the better part of my time trying to describe them, haha;;; They packaged up a shiny new set of leatherworking tools for the old man she robbed in the cult-ridden town, added a small note, and got dressed in their best clothes as part of a convoluted plan to get Mikela to like them. They explained that they wanted to send a shiny new set of tools (omitting that they STOLE the old dudes regular set) to the man who so kindly housed us during our mission as both a thank you for his kindness, and an apology for our bad behavior (and the unmentioned guilt of ruining the dudes lively hood and sanity)- but they don’t know where the courier is or accurately remember the old man’s address :/ Another huge honkin’ success, the hidden truth stayed hidden and Mikela now thinks Uriel is a far better person than they actually are, PLUS Uriel’s nagging guilt of possibly really ruining this dude is lifted. Uriel was also able to gain access to a private bath through Mikela *confetti emoji* which... although not essential to the plot... is a creature comfort that makes it Way less likely that my character will try and escape for home.

Mikela used her and Uriel’s time together to try and figure out something about what the Lunarch had told the group out of her earshot last session. Uriel wasn’t able to lie as efficiently as normal after all the kindness Mikela had shown, and when caught lying Mikela offered even MORE kindness that... honestly caused a short circuit in my character’s self preservation and deceitfulness centers ((or in dice terms, I rolled a nat 1 on deception)). Uriel said that, although Mikela is the person she would want to tell the most, that they’re not in a safe enough place to talk about it. I’m pretty sure this set off every red flag and alarm in Mikela’s head- oops- but the characters are now closer for it :’) The awkwardness and seriousness of the situation entirely left Uriel’s mind the moment she saw how Nice the rooms for the traveling diplomats and higher ups were, and although Mikela still had concerns the two parted because personal hygiene and space are top priority for my dumb child.

At the end of week one, the Grand Lunarch Mikeaus called the “Investigative Squad” (as we seem to have started calling ourselves) to a meeting over the werewolf fiasco, and to introduce a new member to the group. The new member wasn’t the Lunarch’s idea, but the idea of many other Very Concerned church figures who just aren’t totally sure about all this- having someone Mikeaus didn’t pick himself added some security? We didn’t get much time to ask because the new member back flipped (literally) into the room, followed by magical glitter and fireworks. She tried, awkwardly, to get some laughs or applause from our Totally Stunned party, but eventually resigned to just introducing herself. Aurelia, former humble street performer, claims to have joined the church to “better the world” and sees the Investigative Squad as the perfect opportunity... you know... to better things. The scientists were amused, but Mikela was... not. At all. She took it as a personal slight and got Sassy. Introductions went... strangely. Uriel did a damn good job at creeping Aurelia the hell out, especially so when the word ‘scaberen’ was used (it was dodged many times prior to Mikeaus getting sick of us chatting). Aurelia also got anxious learning that Sibyl works in nerco-alchemy. I’d say every other sentence from this girl caused an insight check to happen, but we didn’t get much out of it immediately. Everyone except Aurelia was dismissed, Mikeaus had one final thing to share with her in private.

All together, Mikela began filling in Aurelia on the previous victories of the squad- less out of kindness and more as like,,, a petty accomplishment thing xD Aurelia took interest in the slain demons and Uriel eagerly offered to show off the work she did with the parts. Uriel had a full... maybe ten max minutes... of glory in which she thought the Whole Party was interested in seeing the upgrades she did to Ugly, and the new sculptures she was able to put together, before shit started hitting the fan. Aurelia managed to slip past both Uriel and Ugly and into Uriel’s totally trashed room to steal some unguarded demon parts. While Uriel struggled to get Aurelia back Out Of Their Space, the door fell off the hinges (thanks Ugly) and EVERYONE entered their disdainfully messy apartment. :( Sibyl and Mikela did some checks on Ugly to determine if the parts were safe. They aren’t. :(. One of the checks involved a spell that was able to detect demonic energies and Mikela detected the stolen part. 

Its... hard to describe how many /just barely successful/ deception checks Aurelia had made up to this point and HOW on edge everyone else was... but it was intense- and right here is where it started really going wrong really fast. Mikela grabs Aurelia’s bag and demands to know what the hell is going on, why there’s demonic energy in her bag, and what shes ACTUALLY here for. Aurelia tries a few more lies that fail horribly. “Demon parts that’s SILLY why would anyone want THAT” was said to the faces of both a scaberen and a necro-alchemist. She slips that shes from Nephalia as well and Uriel recognizes her. They call her out as a parts dealer they bought angel blood from once, which sets Mikela OFF. Aurelia tries to flee and combat starts. Shes slippery enough to avoid getting caught by Uriel’s whip AND grabbed by Ugly, but with great effort Mikela is able to grapple her- in the process knocking a ton of highly volatile scaberen chemicals onto the ground and lighting the damn apartment on fire. Sibyl uses her attack to try and put out the flames, fails. Aurelia casts a spell that frees her from Mikela’s grapple, and the shockwave from which blows out the fire. She makes a run for it and leaps out the window. Uriel lays on the ground and checks out from this chase b/c ughhhhhfuck this I almost lost all my work and supplies I’m out.

Sibyl peruses with a flight spell, and Mikela grabs the attention of some church guards from the window to join in the chase. Aurelia casts hideous laughter on Sibyl, who falls out of the sky onto Aurelia, leaving them both prone with a chance for the guards to catch up- they don’t though. Sibyl casts charm person on Aurelia, which keeps her from attacking, but not from escaping as she casts an illusion and vanishes (?). Mikela leaves Aurelia’s stuff with Uriel in the room and rushes to the combat. 

The session ended and the DM advised on thinking up a background character just in case the party manages to catch Aurelia and kill her- or if Aureila escapes for good. I hope neither of those is the case because holy Crap that was a hilarious session. I gotta do some doodles from it because- just- MAN.

[horatiosroom]

I’m going to enable asks on this blog again so that from now on any myspace questions you have can be answered here! 

It was also brought to my attention that some people might not be able to see those recent myspace au info posts (probably because i have c4rc4ss listed as a blog with sensitive content) so I’m going to paste the info here for you guys under the cut :^)

Anonymous said: omg i would love a visual novel of myspace au !!! (I would pay good money for it) but for now tho, did you take away anything from tlj to work into the au?? how is myspace 2.0 any different, if at all?

AAAAAAAAAAA YAY!!!!!!!!!! I’m hoping that once I hit my next goal on patreon then i’ll be able to dedicate more time to it~

Anywho, to take the story where I wanted it to go I stopped trying to fit concepts from the movies into it. At this point the only things connecting it to sw are the characters’ names and very VERY base personalities that were established in tfa, otherwise it’s become its own thing!

The au will explore the reasons for their weird experiments and the consequences that go along with them. For the au I don’t want to fetishize Hux experimenting on Kylo. As much as I’m into that in other iterations of the ship, their reasons for doing stuff like that here are related to complicated issues regarding intimacy.

I think the biggest change to the au is how Hux is presented. It would take a while for me to try to talk about how much of a characterization MESS he was initially so I’m not gonna get into that, haha. What I will say is that he has a consistent personality now. I’ll list some stuff that is integral to his character in the new version of the au:

Hux is still asexual. In this version he has had no experience with anyone and has difficulty initiating even simple types of affection (for example, he will touch Kylo’s lips with his fingers to ask for a kiss). He doesn’t have trouble touching people and isn’t shy, but touches with meaning are hard for him to figure out.

He has a tic disorder which manifests mostly as twitching and excessive blinking. He is self conscious of his disorder and thinks it makes him ugly.

His father and older brothers have an unhealthy view regarding Hux’s mental illnesses and tic disorder, treating him like an embarrassment and a freak. Hux has trouble accepting help from others because he is afraid that they want to “fix” him like his father and older brothers tried to do.

Hux’s interests can skew towards morbidity, but he has no desire to hurt anyone. He is afraid of the fact that blood and organs are more sensually appealing to him than any kind of sexual act. With good intentions, Kylo encourages Hux to explore these interests to make him more comfortable, but it results in some dangerous consequences.

He is fascinated by bugs. He collects specimens to inspect, display, and eat (if they’re edible).

Hux has a collection of items related to Kylo (strands of hair, beads from a broken kandi bracelet, slips of paper he doodled on and threw away, etc).

He often feels detached from reality, like he doesn’t even exist. This is why he feels more comfortable with bodies or specimens rather than people. Kylo is the only person who ever made him truly feel alive and happy and real.

He doesn’t intentionally self-harm, but Hux will scrape at his arms with his nails when he has a panic attack or dissociates.

Hux can be an asshole and will say rude things without thinking. He gets in trouble at school a lot for talking back to his teachers or making tactless jokes. His rudeness is more of a defense mechanism than a desire to actually be mean to people. He knows that others think he’s creepy or scary so to protect himself he just amps that up. One of the many reasons he likes Kylo is that Kylo ISN’T afraid of him and can see through the bullshit.

I could probably go on a lot longer about the other changes (remind me to talk in depth about Kylo!!), but I hope this gives a little more insight into MySpace 2.0 :^)

Anonymous said: Omg !! Tell us about Kylo in myspace 2.0 !!!

YES!!!!!!!!!!!! OKAY!!!!!

Kylo has the kind of personality that lets him befriend p much anybody, but those are only surface friendships. For all the thousands of myspace friends he has, he’s very lonely. He masks his depression and anger with an over-the-top persona which ends up hindering him further - not many people want to get to know who he really is underneath the impulsive melodramatic clown facade. He feels like people think of him as a joke and he doesn’t know how to change that because he put himself there in the first place.

With his parents divorced and Leia always busy, Kylo is desperate for attention which is one of the many reasons why the scene lifestyle appeals to him - he’s essentially a myspace celebrity and even though most of the people in the community are insincere, the attention he gets from all the drama makes him feel less empty.

Besides being starved for attention, Kylo is also starved for physical affection. This manifests in him going too far too fast and coming across as “slutty” even though ultimately he’s just looking for the comfort and security that physical closeness provide.

Kylo is nonjudgmental and appreciates people for their eccentricities or differences. He can see past things that other people might consider strange or off-putting. For example, Kylo doesn’t consider Hux’s tics to be unattractive - he likes how when Hux blinks a lot it draws attention to his pretty eyes and eyelashes.

When he has the time, Kylo helps his uncle Luke teach karate to younger kids.

Kylo doesn’t usually take the time to consider the consequences of his actions so he often finds himself in sticky situations.

He is more passionate about having fun and making others happy than about any particular hobby or field of study.

Kylo doesn’t realize this until later on, but what he likes most about Hux experimenting with him is that Hux will bandage him up and take care of him afterwards. He loves how meticulous and doting Hux is and tries to be on the receiving end of Hux’s care as much as possible.

Though unaware of his own true feelings a lot of the time, Kylo is very perceptive of others’ moods and is good at helping people feel better if they’re having a bad day.

[chickenfetus]

ALL MY EGG (and for the four names: jae, killer kang, minhyuk (whichever one), and santa

deadass i did the 100 questions ask meme for this ask and almost posted it rip

🐰 what is one secret that you’ve never told anyone?

theres literally nothing i dont even know what to say ???? 

💗 if you could hug anyone, who would it be?

not 2 be delusional but i would give up my world to hug changkyun

🐹 what are some of your favourite Pokémon and why?

glaceon is UP THERE idk why honestly but the sinnoh games were my first and i just??? i was really into ice and snow and shit u know so glaceon... thakn u

another pkmn ill always have is lucario ????? its just so cool?????

🌠 if you were in charge of the world, what would the world look like?

hopefully forgiveness and like???? acknowledging mistakes and learning from those u know jst positive stuff and like?? water. god i love water

👀 what was the most recent vivid dream that you had?

hm okay i think this one was from last night or the night b4??? and like???? idk???? i dont even know how 2 start tbh?

so im like hanging over at this two kid’s im a kid 2 i think place and idk we just talk and shit??? idk whomst the boys were tho

and then we get to a scene where its like??? at a train station???? and i go to the washroom to shit or smth idk thankfully i didnt shit myself irl

then i have to get onto the train which isnt even a train its like a carousel with seats??? and its like on a train track boys this is 2 much and i forgot to get ready my train card thing so the guy (who i was p sure was evil) waited for me to remove it so i got onto the transportation device lmao

and then once im seated i remember i forgot my jacket so i make like hand movements 2 the creep and hes runnig 2 me with my jakcet but the ride’s way too fast so i yell and say ill come back for it even tho im p sure i wasnt going 2

after that i wke up wild

☀️ what do you like the most about your best friend?

i dont have a best friend and all of my friends have their own unique qualities if i went into a rant abt them rn this will b so long

😘 talk about your crush or partner

[minhyuk voice] theres none

💁 if someone was rude to you, would you be rude back?

ya bc im petty but it really depends on the person

🌟 what do you like about yourself? (must choose at least 3 things!)

my personality (the good parts)

my values

my taste in friends (my Big Friends are either geminis or scorpios good)

🐾 what are you scared of most? how will you overcome it?

the dark and bitch isnt gonna turn off her night light any time soon

🎁 what never fails to make you happy?

seeing my favourite happy, listening to the music i like 

💙 what annoys you about some people?

i jjust went into a full out rant abt this on the other reply so ill be quiet now

😤 do you get angry easily?

yeahhhhh 

🐇 what do you always daydream about?

my faves tbh

🌻 if you could change 3 things about the world what would you change?

bad people , gone.

everybody only sends love and happy things on anon

i just want everyone 2 b nice & friendly wars of any sort dont exist and no one wants anybody dead

🍓 send me 4 names: kiss, befriend, kill or marry?

if u sent jae’s name earlier id have trouble so im glad

kiss: tihis is so fucking embarrassing wtf minhyku (mx) but only on the cheek basically everywhere except the lips or anyplace weird

befriend: brian :-0

kill: jae goodbye loser

marry: sanha we can yell every time we gotta turn the lights off

✈️ what is your dream city and why?

tokyo bc its NICE

☕️ talk about your ideal day

cant read

🌸 are you an introvert, ambivert or extrovert?

i suddenly thought of the word ambivore which made me think of the word vore i wanna delete im a both? mayb idk

💧 when was the last time you cried?

nov 3 bc my heart hurts whenever i see ppl being a bad friend

🎵 name 5 songs you love at the moment

oh worm

all alone - day6

with you - astro

dramarama - mx (even though it isnt out yet lmao)

run - bts (the superior bts song)

hellevator - / (i was rly gonna make this mixed languages but rip)

⚡️ if you had any superpower, what would it be and why?

to fly bc im basic

💛 if you could talk to your younger self, what would you say?

dont do that

💚 who are you jealous of and why?

nobody in general????????? 

💎 which one would you rather have more of: intelligence, beauty, kindness, wealth or bravery? why?

intelligence i have 2 live somehow what if my money gets stolen

🙊 what are you ashamed of?

my humor

🌺 which languages do you know? which do you want to learn?

i (barely) know chinese despite having 2 take it all my life legends only

i know english but im bad at that 2 and its my first language once again legends only

i wanna learn japanese and korean 

🍀 if you could be any fictional character’s best friend/lover, which fictional character would you be?

the cow from voltron 

☁️ talk about your dream universe.

weve already discussed this

💜 which acts of kindness are you going to do today?

oh w-0rm ok so im a regular anon on this persons blog and i wanted to send an ask but never got arnd doing it so im gonna send her one. soon/

🐬 if you could transform into any animal/magical creature, what would you be and why?

let me live my life as a furry and cat

🍄 talk about someone/something you really dislike

are u ready 4 me to b the meanest person yet bc i sure am lets fucking go

so theres this girl. and i know her (unfortunately) and ive known her since like 4 years ago and back then she was already pretty shit tbh

she cried bc she had to sit in between the “weird” and “dirty” girls in our class and she headass cried in front of them and everyone just bc she didnt like the arrangement?? shes called the “dirty” girl disgusting before and has made fun of her in front of everybody its just bad :-/

now. fast forward 3 years and in addition to still being disrespectful and rude, she now vocalizes her weird fantasies for her “oppas”??? some examples: 

“when i go watch __ perform im gonna climb onto stage and then my mother and my future husband will fight for me” and she calls those kpop idols weird shit and basically sexualizes them/???? she says the weirdest fucking shit on her ig story and tags them??????? 

another thing. she went to korea nd took a picture of a complete stranger and posted it on her public ig and called him her “oppa” and said that they had a “fun day together” despite the guy not knowing her at all???? she posted the pic of him??? i still dont get it tbh 

she wasnt even being ironic at all??? she calls herself & classmates “autistic” whenever she/others do smth dumb or mess up and its just sososososo fucking wrong

being one of the people to see how shes basically grown from bad to worse is something i dont fucking enjoy and i jsut want to leave my class already lmao 

ok but there are times where i do appreciate her because sometimes the class will be rly quiet and the teacher is basically talking 2 themselves but she’ll always respond w/o fail so thats great but its only bc she talks so damn much 

i just got a flashback to when she “jokingly” said she wanted to be a trainee for the rest of her life how do i just. god

😣 talk about some things that have been making you depressed/angry/anxious lately

we’ve once again already discussed this

🍪 what did you want to be as a kid, and what do you want to be now?

i wanted to be various things honestly?? ranging from an astronaut to a vet to an editor to an animator to other stuff i get influenced pretty easily so if i watch smth and i think its cool ill want 2 be that i guess?? ive been trying 2 get rid of that habit so now i have no clue what i wanna be

🍰 what are some of your favourite sugary foods?

sweets and chocolate cake

🍑 what are you obsessed with?

drinking water and staying hydrated

making my friends laugh is great 2

💘 what happens to you when you’re stressed?

acne LMAO 

😪 what are you sick of?

the usual

🙀 are you an adrenaline seeker?

i love scouting on sif and bandori so yeah 

💥 what are some unpopular opinions that you have?

lets not 

☔️ would you consider yourself a good person?

to a certain extent

😊 what do you like to do as hobbies?

use my phone???? send nice anons and comment on art/fics 

🎤 what’s the last song you hummed or sang by yourself?

none

🐝 what’s your worst trait? how are you planning to improve it?

my tolerance for ppl’s shit is so low

🎨 what do you always doodle when you’re bored?

my ocs

🐻 what’s stopping you from chasing your dreams?

i dont have a dream hence myself

🌷 what’s your mbti personality and why do you think it suits you?

infpt i dont rmb shit but yeah

🐶 send me 3 fictional people and I’ll choose my favourite!

falen i dont rmb what u sent

👑 who are your favourite celebrities and why?

i dont follow any :-o zendaya has had my heart ever since shake it off tho

🐴 opinion on day6?

ur rly gonna do this 2m e?

all alone just started playng this is terrible lets get it

so day6. a band i only found out about in late june (thank u boxy) and before this i only ever listened to bts and mx bc my friends stan them so i thought i was gonna expect boys dancing, the usual. 

i clicked i smile and i lost my fucking shit as soon as i saw the instruments because prior to day6 i was a big 5sos fan so this was rly resonating to me tbh and i was just !!! so fukcng excited??? i never intended to even get into day6 honestly??? but after witnessing how good they are and watching about all of the available mvs at that point i was completely in awe so i caved a created a stan twitter for them.

now, this isnt even the most of it. after becoming a fan i realized how much more these 5 boys are. they compose (if im not wrong) and brian writes lyrics for the songs each month because of their everyday6 project and again, im wow-ed because??? the amount of dedication???? they went from releasing 2 title tracks in 2 years to releasing 12 title tracks and 12 bside tracks in a single year. they havent released the december song yet but haviing to work on 2 or more songs in 4 weeks is fucking amazing if you ask me. 

theyre really talented and theyre just so versatile (am i using that word correctly) and each month their songs sound different. this project has given them the opportunity to try new things and you can hear the steady improvement in each of their vocals (dowoonie not so much since he barely gets lines, but we all know hes working hard) and if you listen to their debut song - kongchu and compare it to the version they released along with sunrise it just???? the drumming has even changed from the original version nd its so noticeable that whenever i hear kongchu from 2015 i know its the old ver

to add to those, they do vlives every week and although those vlives are always scheduled it still makes my day seeing them and watching them do the usual. 

one thing im upset about is that how they barely promote themselves, they rarely get on variety shows (the most is individual schedules) and we, as mydays never really get to know the boys so its harder to fall for them as a whole. i dont know if its jyp or day6′s decision but if this is how they want to be known for - their music only, then so be it. we still have jae’s presence on youtube, music access and asc. thats the most we can get and it makes it difficult for us to learn about the rest but thats okay.

another thing. their concerts are something i always look forward to (even though my interest has died down a bit;) their concerts are just so fun to listen to?? there’ll always be mydays who stream the concert so everyone else can listen to them play and they sound so good live it drives me crazy. mydays are always so hyped and whenever mydays sing along it just gives me goosebumps??? bc theyre so???? good????? 

tldr; day6 deserve more, following wise and promotions wise because they work so hard and once this project ends i hope they’ll manage to rest but still remain as a presence that will be known instead of returning to jyp’s dungeon.

🍋 do you consider yourself an emotional person?

there are days where i am more emotional than usual 

📚 share 3 books that you love and your favourite quote from them.

this is tiring

😔 what do you always do when you feel sad? does it help?

i sleep and boy it really helps

😌 what thoughts keep you going when you’re sad?

rest

🌍 which country do you live in?

singapore

🐧 describe yourself in 3 words

lame funny swag

🐵 which quotes changed you?

“rocky swag” - park minhyuk, 2017

💭 do you keep a diary?

nope

💫 who inspires you?

brian kang 

👻 do you believe in ghosts and why?

yes bc i love losing sleep

🎀 what’s your fashion sense like?

terrible

🎬 what are some of your favourite films?

i watched spiderman homecoming and i have no idea why i didnt see the plot twist coming but its GOOD watch it

🍦 what is one treasured childhood memory?

theres none lads

🐼 if you could meet anyone, who would it be and why?

all my internet buddies but sometimes i dont want to bc im kinda....gross

[punkscowardschampions]

Billie & Indie

Billie: Indie! Pabs made frango a passarinho, you want in? Billie: also he said he saw you out at that boy in his year's party on Saturday Billie: you must not have seen him Billie: I got lunchtime detention for all the notes I was trying is pass you in Maths! Billie: Too busy 💤 or doodling, that is the question Indie: spitting dem bars all the way to my 💘 but nah itd be a mad treck from where i @ Indie: lo must have it twisted cos i aint rolling w dem younger rudeboys at no gatherings Indie: my bad tho Indie: too sleepy innit Indie: olders got partys for me to hit up standard Billie: where are you laying your head these days my dear? Billie: aside from your desk, naturally 😋 Indie: 😂😂 Indie: getting the zzzs i need there like Indie: wen im in im out for the count Billie: but what about all the times you're not in 🤔 Indie: in endz Indie: rollin w my boyz or my BOY you know Indie: its chill Billie: what does rolling entail exactly Billie: i'm unfamiliar Indie: 😂😂😂 Indie: rolling up 🚬 standard but can be any thing Indie: hangin, chillin reh teh teh Indie: it be what it be, bills Indie: 🚀🚀🚀 tho Billie: I still feel like those are all just different words for the same thing Billie: which still eludes me but I'm glad you're having fun! Billie: We miss you though, don't you have any time to spare, pleaaaaaaaaaaaase Indie: what you need im here rn Indie: hit me w it Billie: I don't need anything, just want your company silly Indie: you got it Indie: we chatting Billie: Yes, of course Billie: but in person too, yes? Billie: It's not the same without you Indie: what you trying to see my face for? Indie: its still this Indie: [sends selfie] Billie: 😂 Billie: [sends back suitably silly selfie of own] Indie: living for it baby Indie: you looking 🔥 Billie: Thank you Billie: Now I got all the pink out Billie: surprisingly stubborn stuff Indie: mine got dashed mad fast Indie: must be dem curls holdin Billie: Yeah and mine isn't even as textured as some of the others Billie: thank god Ri didn't do it too Indie: she aint as extra as how we is Indie: blessed that i aint blood of ya cos my mans werent feelin the look Indie: hed be proper vexed if it stayed Billie: os homens não sabem nada Indie: this boy got plenty knowledge trust 😏 Billie: NADA 👏 Indie: you reping sound like the other mckenna rn Indie: something you wanna chat ? Billie: I don't need to come out, no Billie: but I appreciate the offer of a listening ear and open mind Indie: safe Indie: you down to mix me up 💘 potion? Indie: thatd be valued by me Billie: Why do you need it? I thought we were in love? Billie: Not you and me 😂 Indie: 😂 Indie: steady bills Indie: not trying to come for your sister & mckennas ⛈ Indie: let em have a min baby Billie: I don't think anyone is enjoying the rain Billie: we're safe to move on Indie: innit tho Indie: hold it for me @ school & ill come thru  yeah? Billie: Of course Billie: but what exactly do you want to happen? it changes what I have to do Indie: gotta keep him 😍😍😍😍😍😍 Indie: that mood Billie: That should be fine Billie: I can't force or influence freewill and fate, obviously but I can certainly help along what is there, that shouldn't be a problem Indie: what it gonna taste? Indie: not tryna make him 😵 Indie: not more than he like standard least 😂 Billie: It's okay, more than likely we'll get you to drink it Billie: then you can attract the love, if you see what I mean Indie: how it not gon attract some next man tho? Billie: with great power, Indigo Billie: you know how to control your allure, I trust 😂 Indie: mayb we swerve it Indie: not tryna get dashed for this like 💔 Billie: Well that shouldn't happen Billie: it's not viagra Indie: 😂😂 Billie: You seem worried Indie: nah Indie: all good Billie: Are you sure? Billie: I've got lots of things for anxiety and stress Indie: what i got to b flat roofin over? Indie: keep your stash Billie: you tell me Indie: nah im jam Indie: nothing to chat on Billie: Good Indie: how you b? Billie: Well, on reflection Billie: I'm okay most of the time but in general I'm quite sad Indie: 💔💔💔 Indie: you got no spells for it? Billie: I'm trying Billie: everything, every day Billie: but not everything can be sorted with magic Billie: not of that kind, anyway Indie: tru Indie: its a madness Indie: i feel it Billie: I know Billie: We've got to stick together Indie: ri aint here tho Indie: not how it can be Billie: Indie Indie: ? Billie: I think Edie has gone too Billie: lots of her stuff is gone Indie: she gon come back thru Indie: thats just how she rolls Indie: dont get it twisted & get 😢 Billie: I know but she usually only takes a bag Billie: if anything Indie: how you kno she not she not shoting her garms for the cash? Indie: gotta do what you gotta do innit Billie: Maybe you're right Indie: if you still got no peace after hot min come @ ri w it Indie: thats how she do making shit hectic again Indie: idk Indie: ma vibes like Billie: Like you said, she's not here either Billie: soon none of us will Indie: shes rollin deep w mckenna but she aint out your reach Indie: you in my inbox you can b in hers Billie: Not the same is it Indie: as face2face nah but better than no thing Indie: trust Billie: I guess so Billie: I hope she comes back Billie: it's horrible when we have to tell the police, they basically blame mum and dad Indie: the feds dont kno how to be anything but amp bringin the dred Indie: dont take it hard Billie: it was different the first few times Billie: now she's just a known runaway and they don't even try to help Billie: just get angry about the paperwork and wasted time Indie: they love to get vexed Indie: always on me too cos i got this face & name Billie: Yeah Billie: I thought they were meant to help Indie: nah baby they only bout helping theyselves Indie: sorry you had to get schooled on that like this Indie: been round me all days late cos the madness drew tryna live rn Indie: like i kno where hes @ Billie: I heard Billie: I always used to think it was a good thing when he went to prison Billie: is that bad Indie: nah man Indie: he heading back that kinda way rejoice in it if you wanna Indie: some good gotta come Billie: Selfish really Billie: but it meant you got to stay with us all the time and he wasn't around Billie: he messed with the vibes Billie: everything was bad when he was around Indie: speak your truth bills 😂 Indie: shots fired Billie: I'm sorry Billie: I try not to be hateful towards anyone but Indie: if you feel it you feel it Indie: whats acting like you dont gon do? Billie: I tend to think of it as wasted or at very least misplaced energy Billie: I try to feel sorry for people I don't get good energy from, or just ignore them Indie: i been knew about wasted energy fr 😂 waiting for my 🚀🚀 to hit like Indie: better energy be coming when i come up Billie: Does it work? Indie: yeah Indie: esp this new kick im on Billie: That's good Billie: what are the side effects Indie: depends what you trying to take Indie: dont be channelling the 👻 of my mas fix on your first go out Billie: I'm just working out the pros and cons Billie: doesn't it scare you? because you're mum died Indie: aint no thing that scares me Indie: we all going Indie: & she got me, not trying to let anything do me like how she went Billie: What's that like? Billie: I'm not scared of death but I'm in no great hurry Indie: its good Indie: nothing can touch me Indie: if im livin im livin if i aint i get to be this age forever 👻 Billie: That must be very reassuring Billie: What about good things though, can they touch you? Indie: how you mean? Billie: I mean, they say you have to know bad to know good Billie: so if you don't have that, do you get to have good or is untouchable outside of that Indie: i kno all it but it just dont be affecting me like that Indie: unless how i want it Indie: all good all the time Billie: Interesting Billie: I wish I could try it sometime Indie: i got you Indie: come thru & link me when Billie: Really? Billie: Okay Billie: I thought I might need a dead parent too Indie: is that tryin to be my key? idk Indie: i was reckonin on drews connections being that if there is Indie: 🚀🚀🚀 life Billie: I misunderstood slightly Billie: I thought that was what made you untouchable but in that case Billie: I'd be happy to try Indie: could be connected i cant speak on knowin Indie: i only got 1 dead ma & didnt get to kno her like that Billie: Yes, I would never ask you to share Indie: 😂 im saying i got others who aint Indie: so mayb its not a powerful thing Billie: we'll have to see Indie: not that i got em rn if you tryna test Billie: mothers or drugs? Billie: i'm lost Indie: mas Indie: you kno i always got the other Billie: Why not? Indie: we gone from each other Indie: like you said everyone is Billie: you just have to come round Billie: you know Indie: where? Billie: home Indie: but where that tryin to be now? Billie: Wherever your family is Indie: & who are they now? Billie: Whoever you choose Billie: us included, I hope Indie: nah Indie: it dont get to be however i want Billie: Why not? Indie: idk its not the way Indie: everyone tryin to tell me how to choose & aint listenin Billie: I'm listening Billie: and the universe Billie: What do you want, Indie? Indie: I want it how it was Indie: nah i want him gone and her back Billie: Yeah Billie: Me too Billie: I think we all do Billie: I'm thinking on ways to make it so Indie: but even if she comes home it aint gonna be for me just you Indie: we got too much beef Billie: I didn't know Billie: what happened? Indie: she got no love for me rn cos i trying to keep my mans Indie: she dont understand how i feel Billie: I see Billie: Did you tell her? Indie: yeah but she aint trying to kno she just wanna be vexed and tell me how to be Indie: shit gets too heated Billie: She'll calm down Billie: it's nothing to lose a sister over is it Indie: tell her Indie: she aint spoke to me since i got my ink Indie: she said she aint here for me its done Billie: I know she didn't mean that Billie: do you actually want me to talk to her for you? I can Indie: what you think you gonna say? Indie: she aint gonna be about me unless i dash him Billie: You're more important to her than that Billie: I'll just tell her you want to talk Indie: i cant Indie: i aint got no energy to be fighting w her Indie: hes here & she aint that decides it Billie: Okay Billie: It's up to you Indie: nah Indie: no things up to me they are how they are Billie: If you don't try to change them, yeah Billie: not saying you have to Indie: girl i aint got power like that i aint you Billie: If I had any more than you she'd be back already Billie: but you have to try, right? Billie: Passivity is still a choice Indie: it hurts Billie: I know Billie: but it doesn't feel Billie: good, lack of a better word Billie: accepting how it is either, does it? Indie: nah but its easier to act than trying & getting owned for it Indie: you feel me? Indie: if you gotta let stuff in where you gonna stop Billie: Hmm Billie: Good question Billie: When the stuff is more bad than it is good Indie: how you measuring Indie: shits such a heavy mix Billie: That's the trick, isn't it Billie: Depends how much bad you're willing to take Billie: they aren't equal, bad deeds weigh much heavier Billie: there'd need to be a lot more good to counteract them Indie: hear this, if a boy makes me feel everything that's bad and its good Indie: he hurts me and he wants me Indie: is it equal or nah? Billie: I can't tell you what you can deal with, only what I think you should Billie: and it doesn't sound equal to me Indie: but maybe close as imma get Indie: w how lads be Indie: they want what they want and how they want it & if he wants me then thats good Billie: What's good about it? Indie: feelin the love Indie: like who we tryna measure him against? mckenna? your da? idk thats a madness Indie: they grown Billie: I don't think all boys are like that Billie: or men Billie: there's an inbetween Indie: is it tho Billie: 'course Billie: we're not like lots of girls at school but we're not grown either Indie: idk maybe ive got things twisted Indie: or maybe i cant hit you w the real words Billie: That's alright, you don't need to Billie: get it right for yourself though, that's important, even if it takes a while Indie: what if rio been right & she hates me Billie: She doesn't hate you, for one Billie: and she's not going to hit you with an 'I told you so' Billie: give her a chance Indie: i gotta hit her up Indie: imma do it Billie: Well done Billie: I'm so sure it'll be worth it Indie: youre sick Indie: 💖💖💖 Billie: ❤️ 🧡 💛 💚 💙 💜 🖤 Indie: real 👑 moves Indie: im not about to forget it Indie: 🚀🚀🚀 or nah Billie: 'Course not 😊 just try to see my notes next time 😂 Indie: innit tho Indie: come find me when he aint around Billie: 👍 Will do

[flowisk]

A-Q :3

(A) Do you have any autistic friends? What are your favourite things to do together?You’re autistic dude. And I looove to infodump and rant about SIs we share, that’s the glorious shit right there. idk i do so much shit together with you it’s kind of hard to think… i love our talks, i love playing games w you, and i love you introducing me to your interests and getting the chance to share my interests with someone who’s patient and gets it. nice shit.Weirdly not a lot of people closest to me (minus you, the Closest to me) are autistic? I know other peeps who are autistic but for w.e reason I’m often not super close.(B) What sense do you most like to stim with (tactile, visual, proprioceptive, etc.)?hmmmm probably audio. It was a Big one in my childhood. i used to carry a cd player and my specially constructed playlists everwhere. i’ve always been esp fond of playing amvs on repeat, so id say that has audio/visual components, but visual on its own doesnt do as much for me. probably, that’s the funnest one as well.maybe this category is vestibular? my ‘anxiety’ stim tho is touch, pressure. i’ve recently become more aware that when im overwhelmed i have a tendency to lay down or wrap myself up. hug my dog. i pace a lot unconsciously if im worked up or anxious but… for reasons i tend to try to avoid this as it draws comments. i have to doodle, rip something up or play a phone game when im sitting for long periods of time, otherwise ill start fuckin w my face.(C ) What are some of your favourite stims?you ever get some of that synthetic sand shit? fuckin cool. neatest fuckin stim toy i got.i like my scented shit, the erasers and pencils. i just think theyre fuckin neat and they do help w concentration. huff that minty scent.but #1 is probably amv watching, since it’s cheap (free) and fun, and i can get really into it. most exciting, viscerally.(D) What was your first special interest? Do you remember anything about it?oh jeez haha i was gonna say bats, and although that was a little more alienating, pokemon actually was my SI before themluckily pokemon made me friends, bats didn’t as much. only gifts i wanted for christmas had to do with pokemon. i remember the one year i was like ‘all i want for christmas is a pokedex’ and my mom lied and said santa got it to me ahead of everyone, but it was a well-intentioned lie. you inputted the pokemon’s number manually and it gave you little facts. i was super into pokemon before i could even read, kindergarten. i can remember my dad reading the episode where all the pokemon are stuck on the island together to me (which was one of my favourite episodes). he hated it. i remember relatives used to tease me when i was 6-7 by saying something like they ‘saw a pikachu’ outside and id run out. relatives still tease me about how obsessed i was w pokemon as a baby, and i cant deny, i was. actually i really only have five memories or so of my grandpa (he died when i was 8), and one of them most vividly is showing him my pokemon collection and telling him all their different names.there was a kid i visited once a year and played pokemon with back in 2000 when my uncle thought he’d try to start a ski lodge or some shit and every year we’d exchange one pokemon toy.when i was… 8? my arm went through my family’s front window. literally painless, if you’ve ever doubted what going into shock feels like. anyway i remember clearly when the ambulance showed up that my last request to my panicking mother was to ‘grab my gengar and lickitung’ (two pokemon small plushie toys id gotten from a canadian tire that i was super attached to and used to ‘fake train’ by throwing around the backyard and giving speeches to)i bought those little silly straws w pokemon attached and id rip the pokemon off them to ‘free them’.i dont talk about it a lot, but i was actually Quite An Obsessed Little Pokemon Fan haha.anyway i was into bats for awhile after that, i read the book silverwing in… what must have been grade two or three? because i vividly remember drawing a bat for my ‘science book’ cover page in gr.3 based directly off its cover. i used to go around parroting bat facts in a little ‘bat fact notebook’ i made that was a little notebook id gotten from halloween with an orange cover and little black bat on the front. gr 3 kid: ‘hey whats ur name’me in gr3: ‘hey did u know they attached bombs to bats in ww2′anyway i remember once a parent on a school trip tried to correct me spouting my bat facts by condescendingly telling me ‘bats lay -eggs-’ and i got so furious w them until the teacher had to awkwardly admit they were wrong(TBC bc im sorry, im rambling)

[generous-dimensions]

u already know im going to ask steven and thomas

i think ive done this same meme for them before so ill throw in another one too in case my answers are too similar this time

pls send me ships to gush abt tho im in a sappy mood

Who asks the other on dates: 

thomas probably but it’s more like “hey wanna go grab dinner tonight”

Who is the bigger cuddler:

steven, that bitch is like a furnace too so thomas doesnt rlly mind

Who initiates holding hands more often:

also steven probably?? i think i said thomas last time but steven’s a clingy little gremlin

Who remembers anniversaries:

they both do for the bigger milestones but thomas is the one whos like HAPPY 2 YEARS SINCE WE FIRST HELD HANDS

Who is more possessive:

neither of them really but probably steven 

Who gets more jealous:

just based on the siren au i’d say steven, but in actual canon neither of them really have a reason to be, they’re really trusting and stuff

Who is more protective:

steven again, they put a protection spell on thomas at one point even just in case anything bad ever happens (he thinks they just wanted to give him a cool stick-n-poke but nope it’s enchanted w magic ink)

Who is more likely to cheat:

BAD QUESTION NEITHER OF THEM WOULD

Who initiates sexy times the most:

i dont want to stay steven again but steven

Who dislikes PDA the most:

neither of them rlly mind it

Who kills the spider:

thomas scoops it up and puts it outside after steven offers to just blast it away w magic

Who asks the the other to marry them:

thomas spends 4 months planning the perfect proposal and the night before steven is just like “wouldnt it be dope if we like, tied the knot”

Who buys the other flowers or gifts:

thomas!! hes very into the traditional lovey dovey stuff

Who would bring up possibly having kids:

mmm i dont think theyd ever have kids? but if they did thomas would want them first. they could have biological kids but i think since thomas is adopted and stevens not into the whole pregnancy thing they’d adopt

Who is more nervous to meet the parents:

oh thomas for sure bc he knows steven’s parents suck big time

Who sleeps on the couch when the other is angry:

thomas but it only happened once and they got into an argument about something dumb like. anime or ice cream flavors. they never really fight about anything huge or serious, they just compromise 

Who tries to make up first after arguments:

thomas bc steven is very stubborn

Who tells the other they love them more often: 

they say it equally and like all the time

Who accidentally pushes a door instead of pulling/vice versasteven and then thomas makes fun of them for an hour

Who doodles little hearts all over the desk with their initials inside themthomas probably would do it more than steven. steven would draw something dumb next to the hearts like a dick or smth

Who starts the tickle fightssteven

Who starts the pillow fightsthomas

Who falls asleep last, watching the other with a small affectionate smileSTEVEN!!!!!!!! and in the mornings thomas is the first to wake up

Who mistakes salt for sugarsteven but they try to play it cool and drink really salty coffee. thomas is just like “babe please stop your dignity isnt worth this”

Who lets the microwave play the loud beeping sound at 1am in the morningthomas i guess?

Who comes up with cheesy pick up linesthomas and he says them with the biggest shit-eating grin and steven just groans and shoves his face

Who rearranges the bookshelf in alphabetical orderhmm probably thomas

Who licks the spoon when they’re baking browniesthomas 

Who buys candles for dinners even though there’s no special occasionTHOmAS

Who draws little tattoos on the other with a pensteven for sure, it started with just little doodles but sometimes they accidentally give thomas a whole sleeve without thinking about it when they’re just chillin and watching tv or whatever

Who comes home with a new souvenir magnet every time they go on vacationthomas, it started ironically but he’d kinda love it after a while

Who convinces the other to fill out those couple surveys in the back of magazineshmm probably thomas but like. neither of them would tbh