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beautifuldarkmind · 3 years ago

Note

tw // s*lf harm, su*cidal ideation (sorry)

Hey, it’s the creepy NHS anon here.

Thank you for responding to my ask! I’m sorry you had such a rough time getting a diagnosis. You shouldn’t have had to go through all of that. Honestly it sucks that the NHS is so reluctant to diagnose anything mental health related.

When I was 14 I thought I had depression and anxiety. I finally convinced my mum to take me to the doctors when I was 16. The doctor was super nice. She tested my thyroid function just to make sure nothing else was causing my feelings, then referred me to CAMHS. That was…an interesting experience. I remember asking my counsellor to diagnose me, but then at the next session she said she couldn’t, that it “wouldn’t be helpful” because I was still growing. Now that I think about it, one of the days I was at school and during a class I was furious for some reason. I even said to a classmate that I was willing to fight anyone who got in my way. Despite my mum disagreeing with me, I cancelled my appointment that day. (My mum was worried they’d stop my sessions all together if I cancelled, but they didn’t.)

Fast toward to recent years and I’ve been on and off attempting to get a diagnosis. Last year (so when I was about 18) I asked to be referred to the autism clinic, and thankfully the GP accepted, but the clinic is still closed and even when it’s open I’ll still have to wait, possibly several years. Then I made another appointment (different GP) to be referred to a psychiatrist. She refused, saying that GPs are trained to deal with mental health issues. I brought up OCD, so she asked where I got my information from. When I told her I researched it online, she just brushed it off and then did the typical depression/anxiety test and she said both were severe, then said “take some drugs” (which is didn’t because I didn’t trust taking drugs prescribed by someone who did a 3 minute yes/no type quiz without actually fully exploring my issues).

I spoke to a different GP just over a month ago to get a fit note for my Universal Credit. It was supposed to just be to make adjustments to what I was supposed to do, but he didn’t ask what the note was for, so he marked unfit for work. Which is great because that’s secretly what I wanted but feared being judged by people around me for thinking I needed that (particularly my parents). I mentioned that I thought I could have OCD and CPTSD, and he didn’t deny it but he simply said CBT helps for both. He then asked if I was currently doing CBT and I said I’d done it before but I quit. (That’s a whole other story but tldr I really don’t think it was for me, or at least the “therapist” wasn’t.) He said he would send a self referral link.

Fast forward to a few days ago and I had another appointment with him to discuss my fit note (because it only lasts for a month and you have to go back to renew it, which sucks). He asked if I had referred myself to CBT and I said I hadn’t yet because I didn’t want to, and he said “please do that for me” in a somewhat stern voice. I then brought up BPD and I think he said he would refer me? Honestly I was a bit overwhelmed because he called 40 mins early and I was in the car with my dad, so I was super weary of him asking questions about what I was saying to the doctor (but he didn’t). He then brought up PD support groups, which I’m considering doing, but you have to call up the place and I literally hate phone calls. Oh, speaking of which, all the appointments from the autism one onwards were all on the phone, so not only was I struggling to process what they were saying to me most of the time, but I was also so anxious that I couldn’t articulate my feelings properly. :)

Anyways, I am 20 now, which I only mention because I feel the same as what you mentioned. My brother is married, my childhood crush is married, my friend who I introduced to my friend group who then proceeded to discard me is getting married. Everyone seems to know exactly what they’re doing. They all have friends. But not me. I haven’t had friends since I was 14, and even then I don’t think that friend group was entirely wholesome. They made me feel like an outcast, like I was weird, that I needed to be more like them and not be like me. Which has probably contributed to me having a very vague sense of identity. And I feel like I’m still 14 and yet everyone is expecting me to behave like an adult. I’m supposed to know what I’m doing with my life even tho I literally cried in the shop when I was pressured to choose between 2 pizzas.

I have no support system. My own parents seem very dismissive of my problems, equating everything to social anxiety. When I’m stressed out of mind to the point of feeling suicidal, my parents say “that’s just life”, which…well, feeds into the feelings. For years I’ve felt stressed. Then if I’m not stressed I feel absolutely nothing. And if I’m not feeling empty I am angry, sometimes for no reason. And if I’m not angry, I am curled in a ball trying to bottle up the urge to self harm and batting away suicidal thoughts.

It’s like I have a huge chain pulling me down underwater and everyone else is in the beach drinking cocktails or something. Sometimes I thrash and try to get people to notice, but people think I’m just having fun. Other days I just feel like letting the chain pull me down.

Please forgive me for rambling and probably not having a very consistent train of thought in this post. I have a tendency to blab on about my “problems” (if they even are that), I guess as a way to connect? Idk. This post makes no sense.

I hope you’re having a good day. <3

- 🌸✨ (in case I send another ask again, but I’ll try not to because I don’t wanna bother you)

So sorry you're going through something similar. My GP sounded exactly how yours was, the typical anxiety/depression test and then just throwing those at you.. they dont seem to be trained in diagnosing and they dont want to hear anything more either. It's honestly almost impossible getting a diagnosis through them, the system here is really messed up... its just disappointing and seems to be failing so many people including you.

It does sound like you're going through a hard time, it's not nice especially when you feel a loss of self identity, you dont even know who you are and just feel lost in life. I think that was definitely the main point of realising something was up.. I had a VERY distorted view of myself and others around me and that was why I'd often self sabotage everything and then I'd feel so empty and angry at the world and just explode...

If you can go privately then do so, therapists are not able to diagnose and they will usually tell you 'we don't like to label' but even without a diagnosis you can still see if you can access DBT therapy. Amazon also has lots of DBT workbooks that I've used and its helped me to really understand myself!

If you often feel invalidated by your parents then that is known to cause BPD or borderline traits, especially if you've been suffering with mental illness in childhood and they tried to claim that it was nothing....you mentioned anxiety and I was told the approach my parents may have took to my severe anxiety is what brought on many of my symptoms of BPD. You start to feel ashamed of yourself for feeling that way because your caregivers make it seem like the issue isnt important and you feel as if your feelings dont matter also because that is how you have been made to feel.

I'm not saying this is definitely the cause but in my case I was told that the constant feeling of invalidation may be why I have such a warped idea of myself and why I cannot regulate my emotions. I was never told HOW to regulate or shown how to, just told to ignore my emotions and now I dont know how to deal with them😀

but yeah I'd really recommend taking a look at some of those dbt books online or reading more into it so you have a better understanding of yourself. You've already taken the first step and that's identifying that something may be wrong so you are self aware and clearly want to change for the better 💕

I hope everything works out for you, it's not nice feeling this way but you've got this 🥺🙌

#ask #bpd #borderline personality disorder #tw

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creek-cryptid-deluxe · 4 years ago

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I just want to clear something up, in case there's anyone who can only see my notes with a user tagged on my "don't hate doctors/that's not ableism" rants.

I can no longer see the tagged user's comments, so I'm unsure if they are also gone for everyone else & it just looks like I'm going off at random.

So let's chat about why I went off, shall we?

Now, if you've been here at all, you've read my intro blurb which directs you to my pinned post. Within that pinned post there's a lot of information, some of which says that if you don't like what I have to say, my views, or my opinions based on my experience then don't read it. Nobody is forcing you to, so scamper off. It also says for those people to not "come for me" (as the kids say) in the notes because I will use those words, views, & opinions you dislike to verbally spar (and I have so much more experience at the verbal slap down) & then will screenshot & post it on here while laughing at your ridiculous hubris.

That same pinned post lays out, very clearly I think, my feelings & thoughts in a general way about the chronic illness community at large. And while I do have posts that are tagged with CI & EDS hashtags, I deliberately didn't tag these 2 posts. So to find them, this person who doesn't follow me had to go into my blog & scroll. And I don't mean go to my blog via the chronic pain post because the posts in question were posted after so they would only show if they went into my blog & started at the top.... where the pinned post is.

So anyone with half a damn brain knows what they are in for when scrolling through my shitshow, yeah? Yeah.

Welp, apparently that post about "why it's bad to promote doctor hate/that's not fucking ableism you whiny baby" got someone's undies in a bunch & they decided to let me know that according to them....

• I am invalidating people's medical trauma

(nowhere in that post did I say anything about medical trauma, but a doctor doing anything mentioned in my post will not cause such a thing. Waking up during a surgery, such as a gallbladder removal, & being unable to let them know so you just have to deal/watch, THAT would cause medical trauma. And if that sort of thing has happened to anyone reading, I am so so sorry. That is terrible & I hope you have been able to seek help in dealing with it.)

• That i am 'not allowed' to invalidate those people.

(Again, never did but also you don't get to police what I say on my blog sweet cheeks. And I think it's ironic that you're telling me that I can't invalidate someone's feelings/experience while simultaneously invalidating mine because... you read something you disagree with & decided it was a personal attack. Hm. Seems you might be the type of person I was talking about in both posts.)

• That I have NO IDEA what it's like to be misdiagnosed 10+ times.

( ok, #1 you have to be the most illiterate motherfucker who can still string together a typed sentence because both that post AND my pinned post clearly state that I wasn't diagnosed with vEDS until I was THIRTY FUCKING ONE. You think I just spent that time period thinking everything is fine and dandy while my joints crumbled & organs ruptured & got pneumonia every fucking winter? No, bitch! I was trying to sort it out & was misdiagnosed REPEATEDLY starting at 7 yrs old. So please, tell me again how I have no idea what that's like.

And #2. Unlike you, I actually went and looked at your blog pretty carefully. Since I have better reading comprehension than you, I saw that you are an uber dramatic 18 yr old kid who fancies herself an uber spoonie witch! I find everything about this deeply offensive.

#1. You're 18. Of course you're dramatic. You're a teen. But also, you have zero actual life experience but think you know everything... as literally every teen does... while actually knowing fuckall. Cute.

#2. You claim to be a witch because... you collect crystals and like the aesthetic. You know that the various branches of witchcraft are like... legit belief systems right? In fact a lot of them are actual religions with deities and rituals and everything. So while you are screeching about 'InVaLiDaTiOn' you're over there appropriating not just A religion, but an entire GROUP of varied & nuisanced religions and practices. Very uncool and very (feel like I'm beating a dead horse with this but...) ignorant.

"But you have witch in your blog title!"

Yeah bro. I'm a practicing green witch. In high school I did loads of research on the different types & branches of witchcraft. In my early 20s, I decided that green witchcraft really aligns with my beliefs & way of life, plus it caters to my distaste for deity worship & ritual. So...

#3. I can understand why you decided to get all indignant in my notes since in those 2 posts (and my various other rants about chronic illness communities & culture) you are EXACTLY WHO I'M TALKING ABOUT. People like you are what's wrong with the community. People like you are why it takes so long for young women, specifically, to be taken seriously by doctors.

BECAUSE OF OBVIOUSLY EXAGGERATING, VICTIM MENTALITY HAVING, DRAMA QUEENS LIKE YOU.

So kindly fuck off and grow the fuck up. When you are my age, you will look back at this & you will cringe so hard that it will cause you physical pain. Or you'll be the lady at the TJ Maxx screaming about discrimination because they won't let you return an item that is outside of their return policy.

For your sake I hope it's the former.

And if anyone else feels the way this youngster did, you can fuck off too. Again, nobody is pulling a Clockwork Orange & holding your eyes open, making you read my shitfest, opinion & experience filled blog.

♡ A chronically ill, disabled elder millennial ✌

There will be no reblogging of this post because while it may echo some of your personality sentiments, this is about a specific note on a specific post from a specific dramatic butthurt whiny baby user.

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foresthearth · 4 years ago

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Review: “Witch”, by Lisa Lister

Coming in three years after publication, ‘cause that’s how I roll.

Okay, I have to mention, I HATE these matte covers that pick up fingerprints like you wouldn’t believe. Ugh. Why do this to me and my greasy little hands?!

Moving on.

TL;DR: If you are a cisgender, AFAB woman with a fully functioning reproductive system, who finds this fact to be intrinsic to your parsing of femininity and spirituality, this book will probs be great for you.

Everyone else? This book is bad. Yes, there is some nuance to this and the WHY of its badness (and all reviews are subject to reviewer bias), but overall, in summation? It’s bad.

To start off, the kinda dubious but overall not so bad: it doesn’t really tell you anything. It bills itself as sort of a cultural studies text crossed with an intro to witchcraft; however, for me, it fails at both. As a textbook, it does not cite sources, though there is a “Bookshelf” section at the end – the text itself, however, really just serves as a place for Lister to talk about her perceptions of the female and feminine power throughout history. Which in and of itself is FINE, but don’t say you’re going to explain “the history behind witchcraft” (literally in the back cover blurb) and not actually back that history up with sources. You can talk all you want about persecution of women, but when putting it in a specific context such as the age of witch trials, or referring to societies that used to venerate women before the patriarchy took hold, it really helps to have some primary or secondary source to back up what you’re saying. You may think that we’re all drawing from a common knowledge, but not everyone has access to that knowledge pool, nor has the same background and learning. Just back up what you’re saying, or even just reference further reading that people can do if they want to learn more about what you’re pulling from. (I compare this to one of my books on Queer Magic – it also doesn’t have a bibliography, but that is due to the fact that it IS primary source material, essays from queer folks on *their magic*. Witch is not trying to be a primary source, therefore Lister should really acknowledge where she’s found her information.)

Now, the intro to witchcraft bit. Personally, none of the spells resonated with me – except for the Ostara honeycakes recipe because they are delicious – but that has more to do with how I practise magic. Lister’s practise and mine are very different, and her formalised spells/rituals do absolutely nothing for me. BUT if you are new to witchcraft, and looking for step-by-step guidance for certain issues, or rituals for a sabbat, these could be helpful, or at least give a jumping off point. However, it’s useful to keep in mind that this is not following any specific path within witchcraft – so if you are starting out and want to learn something formalised, this isn’t the book for it. Which is why I say it fails as being an intro to witchcraft: it’s showing you a few spells with no background into the wherefore, no reasoning as to what gives these things the power for this spell. And I feel like that’s because Lister isn’t trying for a tradition-based book, in that she herself works intuitively. So the spellcraft doesn’t really work for me, and I feel like it doesn’t give a firm enough foundation to be considered an introductory book. That being said, it does give just enough information to pique curiosity, so that you may have an idea of where to start further research.

There is one aspect of Witch that I do find pretty good, which is the constant reiteration of finding your own power and believing yourself and trusting your intuition. This is what I think is the strong point of the book overall – Lister says it’s to help women “reclaim the word ‘witch’”, but witchcraft aside, I definitely feel it’s got some good points about not letting yourself be silenced, and moving into trusting yourself and your ways of knowing.

BUT.

There is a MAJOR issue that I have with this book, and that is the transphobia and gender essentialism. And this is what, for me, makes it a bad book.

Let me quote a bit for you, from right near the beginning:

“Yet, as I was pulling my pages and pages of handwritten notes… I felt an overwhelming need to apologize for writing a book specifically about women as witches… I’ll piss off the transgender community for not addressing them… That thought? That need to apologize? That’s the very reason why I HAVE to write this book. What I share is NOT intended to exclude others. But trying to be all-inclusive would totally miss the point.” (Witch, pp. xvii-xviii)

Sigh. If you’re going into something with the feeling that you’re being exclusive and need to apologize, maybe that’s a sign to take a step back and look at who you’re excluding and why. If, to you, “the essence of a witch is someone who trusts their inner authority and uses their own personal magic to navigate and negotiate the environment they currently find themselves in” (ibid. p. xix), then why the need to specifically mention that witches power comes from their womb? Why keep bringing it back to “pussy power” and tying everything back to menstrual cycles? Why? And maybe – MAYBE – if there had only been this passing reference in the intro, it could be overlooked. But the references to pussy power, to wombs, tying power to biology, is constant throughout the book:

“Blessed be my womb for being the holy grail, cauldron and keeper of the mysteries.” (p. xxii)

“One sister is chanting the various names given to the Mother God: ‘Isis, Astarte, Diana, Hecate, Demeter, Kali, Innana’ over and over, from deep down in her womb. (p. xxiii)

“There were no fanfares, marching bands or big applause: just pussy-deep truth.” (p. 3)

“You can only find your power when you plug yourself back into the motherboard. When your feet touch Mumma Earth, and your womb and heart connect with her.” (p. 16)

“Generations of women have been disconnected from the power that lies between their thighs – their lady landscape, their womb and their menstrual cycle. They’ve lost connection with their ability to create life (and everything else) in their wombs, which means their minds can be easily manipulated and indoctrinated by Patriarchy.” (p. 75)

I could go on, but believe me when I say this is pervasive throughout the entire book.

You can’t have it both ways. You cannot give an inclusive definition of what you think a witch is, and then go on to say ‘oh, but you’re only a witch if you have this biological aspect’ and venerate that biological aspect in an exclusionary way. This book is either only for AFAB, cis women with fully working parts, or it’s for everyone.

I am a queer, cisgender woman with pretty severe endocrine issues which have basically fucked my reproductive system. The amount of time that Lister spends in this book, talking about how our feminine power comes from this same reproductive system is absolutely distasteful, as well as being reductive and exclusionary. I’ve spent enough of my life feeling useless and not enough, due to my physical issues, that I really don’t need a book about reclaiming my feminine power to ALSO say that my feminine power is rooted in a fundamentally broken part of my body. Yes, the menstrual cycle/organs are powerful and have strong magic, but they are NOT what makes someone a woman. To say that it is not only excludes those who either don’t have or have ill-functioning systems, as well as reducing women to nothing more than their reproductive systems… And isn’t that what Lister’s trying to get away from, what with reclaiming feminine power and blasting the patriarchy?

And if I feel this way? I cannot even imagine what my trans family would feel like, expecting a book on witchcraft and the feminine, only to be told mid-text, that they’re not valid or wanted.

I’m not saying that you can’t write a book about the power inherent in the reproductive systems. But just be sure to make it very clear that that’s what you’re doing. Don’t play coy and hide your TERF views in the text, put them on the cover so we don’t pay money for exclusionary bullshit.

And for further reading:

https://www.oxfordreference.com/view/10.1093/oi/authority.20110803095846595

https://medium.com/@pennyred/terf-wars-why-transphobia-has-no-place-in-feminism-60d3156ad06e

https://www.patheos.com/blogs/pantheon/2011/03/transgender-issues-in-pagan-religions/

https://godsandradicals.org/2016/02/10/its-all-about-sex-feminism-paganism-and-trans-exclusion/

https://www.hercampus.com/school/york-u/women-wicca-transphobia-and-other-issues

#witch #witchblr #book review #cw: transphobia #cw: gender essentialism

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wcsleyevans · 4 years ago

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a bit about wesley evans

LAYER ONE: THE OUTSIDE

Name: wesley roman evans

Eye Color: brown

Hair Style/Color: curly brown short hair

Height: 5′11

Clothing Style: usually something comfortable to wear in a lab - old trainers, jeans and a graphic tee with some sort of science joke on it

Best Physical Feature: smile

LAYER TWO: THE INSIDE

Fears: his lies about his research being found out

Bad Habits: obsessing over something for a long time and then forgetting about it, biting his nails

Ambition for the Future: to become a father and raise a future scientist

Biggest regret: how things ended with alexa

LAYER THREE: THOUGHTS

First Thoughts Waking Up: "coffee... must. drink. coffee.”

What They Think About the Most: either science fiction or actual science

What They Think About Before Bed: the show he just watched before bed

What They Think Their Best Quality Is: his positivity & ability to help others

LAYER FOUR: WHAT’S BETTER?

Single or Group Dates: single

To be Loved or Respected: loved

Beauty or Brains: brains

Dogs or Cats: cats

LAYER FIVE: DO THEY?

Lie: yes, a lot of the time. about research, about his feelings towards people, about what he actually wants the most in life

Have scars/birthmarks: a lot of scars from experiments gone wrong. a large burn mark on his arm from a heating block, a big scar from an exploding conical flask, and lots of cuts on his fingers from picking up glass

Believe in Themselves: not really - his research clearly isn’t good enough to get him anywhere so he lies about it

Believe in Love: absolutely. platonic, romantic, familial. all kinds of love

Want Someone: absolutely

LAYER SIX: EVER?

Been on Stage: nope

Done Drugs: no

Changed Who You Were to Fit In: he became a bit closed off and impatient when he decided to change his results in order for no one to suspect him of doing anything wrong. but didn’t change to fit in. if anything, when he met sofia he became more himself

LAYER SEVEN: FAVORITES

Favorite Color: emerald green – the colour of bis(N-sec-butylsalicylaldiminato)nickel(II) to be exact. it was the first crystal he every managed to correctly synthesise

Favorite Music: he doesn’t like to admit it, but wes is a big t swift fan

Favorite Animal: cats

Favorite Drink: freshly brewed coffee

Favorite Food: salted popcorn

Favorite Place: his lab

Favorite Sport: he hates sport but if he were to pick one, it would be lacrosse

Favorite Season: autumn

Favorite Holiday: thanksgiving

LAYER EIGHT: IN A BOY OR GIRL

Best Personality: outgoing and extroverted, someone he can talk to about anything even if they don’t understand it

Best Eye Color: doesn’t care

Best Hair Color: doesn’t care

Best thing to do With a Partner: watch sci fi movies and try to ruin the plot by explaining the science. or just sit and talk about nothing, and everything

LAYER NINE: FINISH THE SENTENCE

I love: my work. it’s so cool

I hate: the fact that i might get caught one day

I feel: so lucky to have a best friend like sofia

I hide: my real findings

I miss: how easy the first few years of the academy were

I wish: things had ended differently with alexa. she deserved so much more than she got with me, and i wish she knew just how much that relationship actually meant to me

QUESTIONNAIRE FOR THE MUSE:

What do you look like? (Include body type, frame, hair, eyes, skin, age, and distinguishing features): i’m quite slim, but on the odd occasion i get time off work i go jogging so i guess there’s a bit of muscle definition. i have brown curly hair, brown eyes and tanned skin. my most distinguishing feature is probably my eyes, they’re quite big and expressive

How do you dress most of the time?: i usually wear a graphic tee of some superhero or science joke, jeans and some old shoes that are comfy. oh and also usually a lab coat and goggles, y’know, for science purposes

How do you “dress up”?: i have only ever dressed up once for prom and i wore one of my dad’s old suits that was too big for me. not a good look. but i would wear a nice, fitted suit if i ever had to go to an event that needed one

How do you “dress down”?: joggers and a baggy t-shirt. and fleeces. fleeces were the best thing in scotland as it is freezing up there

What do you wear when you go to sleep?: pyjama bottoms. usually flannel pattern, but i have some in evans tartan which are my favourite thing i own

Do you wear any jewelry?: can’t wear jewellery in the lab unfortunately. too many chemicals and lasers

In your opinion, what is your best feature?: i love how excited and passionate i get about things

How many siblings do you have?: just me bud

What is your father like?: such a supportive guy. he moved us all the way from scotland so that i could go to a better school and become a scientist and for that i’ll be forever grateful. he doesn’t necessarily understand all that i do, but he knows how much it means to me that he’s supportive anyway

What is your mother like?: mum is amazing. she was the head of a firm of accountants in edinburgh and she gave that up so we could move here. she’s so compassionate and kind, and her and dad were made for each other. most supportive parents you can get to be honest

Where do you live? Describe it: Is it messy, neat, avant-garde, sparse, etc.?: i live in a flat in grove harbour by myself. it’s quite spacious as it’s not in the nicest part of town, but i’ve installed cameras, extra security systems and made it really safe. it’s a nice apartment actually. spacious kitchen, cosy living room. it can get messy but mess stresses me out (when it’s not in my lab... that’s a whole different story) so it tends to stay tidy

Are you emotional, depressed, ect?: i’d say i’m an emotional person, sure. luckily i don’t have any mental illnesses.

Would you consider yourself straight, gay, bi, or something else? Why?: i’d say i’m straight, have never thought of guys in that way before but i wouldn’t completely take it off the table. i have been in love with sof since i was about thirteen though and haven’t really though about anyone else other than alexa, so i guess that answers that question

How ticklish are you? Where are you ticklish?: i’m ticklish everywhere. literally everywhere. mainly around my waist, but my feet are super ticklish too

What do you do when you are bored?: i watch old re-runs of sci fi shows, and browse the internet for plotholes. or go see sof. either’s good

What do you envy most?: i envy people advancing in their research. i’ve been at a standstill for months and i don’t know why, and it’s driving me mad

#musings

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ahiddenpath · 5 years ago

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Grumble grumble

Gonna grumble about life below the cut, lol! I’m mostly talking about covid-19 in the states.

A few states have closed down public schools for the next two weeks, which means that many parents are unable to go to work (many daycare centers follow local school shut downs).

My workplace responded by telling everyone who can work from home to work from home. I am a hands-on lab researcher, which means I must continue coming in. However, they created a temporary category of leave for folks who have been exposed to covid-19, or who are showing symptoms. They are paying workers to stay home if they are symptomatic. So really, this is a generous and effective policy... Provided people use it properly.

And any system that relies on people behaving sensibly is a bad system.

What people don’t seem to realize- even people who work in pharmaceuticals?!- is that covid-19 symptoms aren’t limited to coughing and fever. It can also look like the common cold, especially in young, healthy individuals.

I nearly lost my cool yesterday because two of my direct, lab-bench buddy coworkers have been coming to work with cold symptoms. Another was coughing all day, until people shamed him into going home. Meanwhile, one coworker was explaining that her husband’s coworker was exposed to covid-19. I asked why the hell she was here, and she said she’s quarantining on Monday when our telework option officially starts.

Guess I’ll just die potentially become a walking incubator of a disease that could kill other people, then?

Situations like covid-19 call for strict, clear rules stated by the federal government and enforced all the way down. All travelers from impacted areas must be tested/quarantined. Telework is mandatory when possible. Anyone showing any kind of illness symptom must be sent home and put on paid admin leave. Is this disruptive? Yes. Will people abuse it? Yes. Will it drastically reduce the scope of the pandemic and save lives? Yes, so it’s worth it.

Sadly, Trump removed the people who handled the Ebola threat with clear, country-wide enforced rules and... Never... replaced them. We do not have much in the way of federal guidelines, leaving state leaders to decide what to do about covid-19. When Congress tried to get approval for mandatory paid leave for people exposed to covid-19, it was shot down. We don’t have enough covid-19 testing kits. Our federal government has done nothing to protect us, even though they had time to prepare compared to China, and even Italy, which is... beyond frustrating. Beyond the pale, really.

I’m trying to do stuff to help? I pointed out to my boss that our water bottle filler operates by pressing a lever to release water... And people press it with the mouths of their water bottles. He blinked and said, “Yikes... I dispense the water with my cup, too.”

Humans are humans. Scientists are also short-sighted humans, just like everyone else. And if people who have dedicated their lives to creating life-saving medicines can be this ineffective in a pandemic situation... I dunno, I don’t think the future is looking good.

As for the non-scientists in my life, they’re literally more worried about toilet paper than the disease. I told my mom that I’d get her a bidet attachment, and she was insulted? I dunno what it is about Boomers that makes them derive genuine pleasure from hating anything that reduces waste.

If you’re interested, here is what I’m doing to try to stay safe:

-Wash hands with soap and water for 20 seconds, frequently. Do not substitute this with hand sanitizer.

-Do not touch your face.

-Sanitize your phone and computer daily with alcohol wipes (Lysol is better, but check your device documentation to be sure it can withstand it).

-Don’t worry about toilet paper, buy a gosh danged bidet attachment. Also, food and TP shortages are not the problem. Even in quarantines, food stores should be open. But, if you buy produce or anything loose that people can touch, clean it thoroughly. A sick person could have handled it.

-Don’t eat out. Sadly, food industry workers rarely have sick leave and are forced to come in to work when ill.

-Avoid crowds whenever possible, push to telework if you can, don’t travel.

-If possible, stay home if you have any kind of cold or flu symptom.

-Sanitize your home. Look, I love gentle solutions as much as the next Millennial, but it’s time for bleach and Clorox.

-If you must report to work, inspect the communal coffee/water dispensers. Could they potentially spread disease? If yes, report the concern and don’t use them until they are replaced with safer alternatives. Also, do not eat food left out in communal areas following meetings.

-(Edit: I walked back this stance in a new post after talking about this in therapy. I no longer recommend what you’re about to read in this bullet. Check the post linked at the bottom of this post for why.) If your coworker is sick and your company offers sick leave/admin leave, shame them, report them, get them out. I have coworkers who call this a dick move. I respond that taking the risk of turning everyone around them into covid-19 incubators soars beyond ‘dick move’ and into the realm of ‘endangerment of the elderly and the immunocompromised.’ (Seriously, at least two of my coworkers have immediate family members who have no immune system and wouldn’t stand a chance against covid-19).

-If you’re in the states, you might not be able to be tested for covid-19. I really don’t know what you’re supposed to do if you think you have it, other than immediate self-isolation. Calling your doctor for advice is probably the best place to start. I would not roll into a medical facility without calling ahead. There might be infected people there, and they might not even have the kit to test you.

In closing, if you are healthy and under age 65, you will most likely be fine if you are infected at this point in time. But about 3.6% of the USA is immunocompromised. About 12% is elderly (over 65). In 2018, there were 327 million people in the states, ish. So that’s, what... About 51 million people at risk in my country alone?

If the pandemic grows beyond the point where our medical system can handle it, even young, healthy people will be at risk, since people won’t be able to receive proper treatment.

I realize this is scary and disruptive. I’ve never had trouble sleeping in my life outside of jet lag and situations where I was in too much pain to sleep... But now I’m struggling. My costochondritis is having a field day, lol!

Please, please take care of yourselves and others. I love you! Take care.

EDIT: Hey guys! So I had a therapy session on this topic, and I walked back my stance on some of these points after she pointed some things out to me. It’s a fascinating mini case study, so please read it! Also: please don’t force your ideas of what should be done on other people, like I suggested above, that’s the main thing.

#hidden's life

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giggleangels · 5 years ago

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Okay it's Ethan's turn give me the dirt on that guy

ethan. the man of the hour. my dad. he’s a hitman and im trying to find a way to make that possible lmao so bear with me this is subject to change .

Ethans dad was shit, and alcoholic who beat his wife and kid. so ethan went to school with bruises. His dad also taught him to use guns, he was a big gun advocate and ethan just kinda went with it, he was kinda numb for like his whole childhood. ANYWAY, in school, he just drifted. he never made friends ( unless you count varha, who he saw everyday at the nurses office.) he was incredibly smart, and in gifted classes. He ate lunch alone, and was basically the loner that no one even noticed was there. that makes me so sad <:( i feel you ethan. He was already a really distant and unemotional kid, but when he got older he went into the military, mainly the Army and got a position as a sniper. after a few years, he was put in the role of taking out specific enemies, which he did with ease. during this, they really drilled it into his head that he was a weapon for them to use, and that was it. He blocked out his old life, literally, and focused on his job from that point on. After a few years of this, he began picking up smaller jobs inbetween his bigger, government issued ones. Eventually, he realized that the government was making him kill people who has done nothing wrong, and he payed someone to just wipe him out of the system, to reset his whole life in his files. After, he drifted from place to place, taking up jobs as a hitman. But because of his strong moral code, he picked the jobs and carried them out as he wanted. After a very close call with getting caught, he moved back to promise to become a cop, a secret identity he could use to make sure that if the arrows point to him, he could move them away to someone else. As he worked as a police officer, he took less jobs, maybe only one a month. cue getting shot in the shoulder and meeting Varha again!!!! after he met her, he really felt like he had a chance at true happiness, and took it. when they started dating, he began to show his true colors, and she loved it! but he hinted to her that he had a separate job, one he couldn’t tell her about, and she was like “ <:) well as long as its not that bad its ok!” and he was like uh oh. Anyway, a while of dating, shes like “ why have you been disappearing for weeks at a time, where are you going?” And he lies and says he’s cheating, but she sees right through it and tells him to tell her the truth. He does, and he explains why and how he does it, only choosing evil, horrible targets and turning down those he thinks are not worth it. She leaves him, and he goes back to his cold, distant self, going back to his work like nothing happened, like he never met her. a few months later, varha comes back and expresses that she wants to get back together. she’s thought about it for a while, and she doesn’t want to turn him in because she thinks while his methods of doing good arent that good, hes doing what he thinks is right. she says she can help him get better, be a better person, and hes just elated to have her back, breaking out of his cold personality again. He promised to stop killing and focus on his job as an officer, but he found he couldnt really do anything, he didnt know how to separate himself from his old work, and also his pay was not what he was used to and he hated it. He told varha this and she said he could continue under a few conditions. dont let her in on anything, this is private for him. dont let anyone know she exists, she doesnt want to get hurt. keep up your morals, dont kill any innocents no matter what you do. and dont get killed. he agreed and went back to his job. when he was stable again, Varha and him adopted Tarla, and ethan began taking kills that were the safest, and also payed the most, so he could be home. One hunt ended with him taking kyrin and like how does that even HAPPEN??? then levi was born and he was like “ haha ok wow another one” one day Kyrin was snooping around Ethan and varhas shared closet, and found the outfit, mask, and guns ethan used to hunt. He told Tarla, who asked ethan what the heckie was up??? he came clean and told them about his past, and what he did, with varhas help. this kinda strained the relationships with them, but eventually they kinda left it alone, it wasnt really any of their buisness. After Varhas death,He began really obsessing over how she died, his skills and training making it super obvious to him that it was a planned killing. But he never got to the end of it. god im sorry this fucking sucks but im still working on it <:) ok facts! Ethan is best at sniping, but isnt afraid to use his hands. his has a sniper and a pistol. during one mission, he had to get close and kill with a knife. the target slashed him in the face, causing the scar over his eye and making him blind in that eye. the other scar is from a police stand off. idk how tho i just thought it looked wicked cool. his favorite color is green! uhm uhm ill add more when i think about it i had to do alot of research for this one please like it ;;;;

#HNT #Anonymous

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jgreenfeld · 5 years ago

Text

meet the muse;

10 FICTIONAL CHARACTERS

1. Harry Potter

Your obsession with Harry freakin' Potter is a timeless affair. You read the first book tucked into a corner on the a tour bus, musicians fiddling with their instruments all around you, but you were lost to them. You were too busy learning spells, playing Quidditch and fancying yourself Mrs Jessica Potter. Sure, a lot of your friends have outgrown their Harry Potter phase, but you don't think that'll ever happen to you. He was never just a character to you, he was a comfort when you were recovering from your illness and figuring out what life was going to be like without being able to hear things from now on. You lost quite a number of things after the meningitis hit, but you never lost Harry. He taught you how to be brave and true and a little bit sassy, and you're always going to love him.

2. Atticus Finch

Your father is a mechanic, not a lawyer. He wears sports jerseys instead of tweed suits. But he's still the closest thing to Atticus Finch that this world is going to get - in your eyes anyway. Your dad was the first one to introduce you to To Kill A Mockingbird. He panicked and shoved his own copy into your hands after you finished the fifth Harry Potter book and spent three straight hours wailing over Sirius. Of course, TKAM wasn't going to be something that necessarily cheered you up, but you were hooked from the get-go. Atticus taught you how to be just and fair. He taught you to think about what it would be like to walk a mile in someone else's shoes. He taught you valuable life lessons that you still carry today, and even though it would be impossible to hope that everyone in the world could be more like him, you could at lease try to channel all that energy yourself. You like to think that he taught you how to be a better person.

3. Mark Watney

Mark Watney taught you that space is dangerous and terrifying and that it has the potential to be the very death of you. He taught you that it's vast and empty and nothing but a challenge. And it only made you love it even more. When your father picked up on your space obsession, right after your solar system model won first prize at the middle school science fair, he gave you a copy of The Martian. In all honesty, he had no clue what it was about but the name hinted that he was on the right path. You devoured it whole. Or rather... you spent the full night yelling at your book whenever something traumatic happened and Michelle fully attempted to smother you with a literal pillow just to get you to shut up. Mark Watney made you fall in love with space even more, and he kickstarted your desire to work for NASA one day. When you feel like you're never going to make it, you just need to look to him for a kick up the ass.

4. Gilbert Blythe

Gilbert Blythe is the very first love of your life. You understand that there's a high chance you’re not his type, because when he tugs on Anne's pigtails and calls her 'carrots', she hits him over the head with a slate and it's love at first sight for him because of that. If Gilbert Blythe ever tugged on your hair to get your attention, then you probably would have just decided to marry him right then and there. Still, what's not to love about him? He's kind and he's funny and he's smart and he cares about school. Perhaps you would be relationship goals based solely on the fact that you're a nerd and he's a nerd. But you'll never get to test that theory out, which is a shame. In the meantime, Gilbert is setting the standards for all other men and he's raised the bar to a whole other level.

5. Paddington Bear

Paddington Bear is the reason you demanded a duffle coat and red wellies at the age of six. He's the reason you wanted to travel to Darkest Peru whenever a family vacation was brought up. And he's the reason that you still unironically enjoy a marmalade sandwich, even to this day. Plus, he's cuddly and kind and the exact friend you think anyone should have. Honestly, you'd love to be someone's answer to Paddington Bear.

6. Matt Saracen

You're never going to be a football player and, to be quite honest, you never really want to be. You're tiny and any tackle would crush you in an instant. Soccer, on the other hand, is different. And then, of course, there's cheerleading. Matt Saracen was never a cheerleader, although you have total faith in him and believe that he could be anything he wanted to be. He was a football player though, and had always been desperate to be one, despite shortcomings like money and being one of the younger kids on the team. You relate to that. Friday Night Lights taught you all about teamwork. You love being part of a group like that, whether that be the girls soccer team or the cheerleading squad. It's what you miss most about high school, that sense of belonging. You love your family but Michelle likes to make your life a living hell, Brendan can only defend you so much and Gabby has her head in the clouds half the time. Matt taught you that sometimes it's okay to feel way more at home when you're part of a team.

7. Leslie Knope

She likes waffles, she likes fairness and she loves her friends. Leslie Knope is exactly the kind of woman that you want to grow up to be. Maybe you don't have a future in politics, but that's okay! You can still embody her in all the ways that are important. You're a feminist, you would happily arrange a wedding ceremony for two gay penguins and you would absolutely die for Michelle Obama. Leslie Knope is that caring and goofy friend that you want to be, and while you're not as savvy as her or as good with words, and you absolutely do not have her knack for public speaking, you wake up every morning and tell yourself that you're going to be a Pawnee Goddess that day.

8. Clint Barton

You watch the Avengers and you fall in love with superheroes. Your dad seems bolstered by this since he's been trying to get you to read comics for years now, and this eventually persuades you. You discover that you're a die-hard Captain America fan and there are several failed attempts to write a popular Steve/Bucky story when you foray into fanfiction, only to realise you're nowhere near as gifted a writer as you think you are. But you still love this world and these characters and it's like a blanket gets wrapped around you when you find out Clint Barton is actually deaf in the comics. Just like you. You devour Hawkguy, trawl the internet for all the meta discourse and fanfiction you can find and you even dress up as Kate Bishop one Halloween. Clint Barton teaches you that you can have a disability and still be a superhero.

9. Luke Skywalker

There was no way that you were making it through your childhood without discovering Luke. And Leia and Han and Chewie. But Luke was the one that stuck with you most and your dad was very proud of you for that. He's a hero, but not the typical rough-and-tough, 'needs a damsel in distress to save' sort of hero. He teaches you that you can save the galaxy and still be loyal and compassionate and have a good heart. You don't need to be jaded to be a hero, and it's okay to show emotion. And sometimes it's okay to be a little bit of a drama queen as well. You appreciate that last one.

10. Buttercup

The Princess Bride is one of the few movies that you and Michelle actually agree on. Or rather, you like all movies and she hates anything that you like. But even Michelle can't say no to The Princess Bride. Buttercup is a character who undergoes development, giving you hope that maybe one day Michelle will also go through that same growth and decides that she wants you to be her sister. Perhaps it's a pipe dream but you never give up hope. Buttercup also teaches you that you can fall hard and fast for someone who says 'as you wish' to your every command and like, you get that. You're pretty sure that you'd die on the spot should anyone say that to you.

9 TWEETS

@jupiterjess: i've ran out of oreos. is my life even worth living anymore?

@jupiterjess: the new cheerleading captain at jasper high messaged me for tips. LITTLE OLD ME. i'm blushing hardcore.

@jupiterjess: thank you so much to everyone who failed to tell me i've been walking around with a chocolate milk moustache all day!!!!! you're the best guys!!!!!! thanks!!!!!

@jupiterjess: do you ever just. stop and think. about exoplanets?? someone come hold my hand and talk to me about exoplanets.

@jupiterjess: HAPPY BIRTHDAY HARRY JAMES POTTER, YOU'RE THE LOVE OF MY LIFE!!!!!

@jupiterjess: america, i have no idea what you're doing right now, but you need to be better than this. wake up and smell the racism.

@jupiterjess: 'it's a power that jedi have that lets them control people and... makes things float.' rEY asdfgh

@jupiterjess: as a bisexual, the trailer for 'last christmas' has been very difficult for me. thoughts and prayers for jess in this trying time.

@jupiterjess: @NASA i love u

8 FACTS ABOUT SPACE

1. Halleys Comet won’t orbit past earth again until 2061

JESS' INPUT: Okay, so here's another fun fact about Halleys Comet! At Disney's Magic Kingdom, Main Street USA is connected to Tomorrowland by one thing and one thing only. Main Street's design is based on the year 1910, and Tomorrowland's design is based on the year 1986. What do those two years have in common? That was when Halleys Comet orbited past Earth! ... That's more of a Disney World fact, but pretty cool all the same, huh?

2. A full NASA spacesuit costs $12,000,000.

JESS' INPUT: 12 million! That's so much money, holy smokes. Honestly, imagine going around wearing an outfit that cost 12 million dollars. Wouldn't be me! I'm getting anxiety just thinking about it.

3. There may be a planet made out of diamonds.

JESS' INPUT: Okay, so this planet is like, 40 lightyears away and it's eight times the size of earth. Researchers think it could be made of graphite and diamonds and everyone is like 'wow, that's cool!' And okay. yeah, I get it. Diamond planet. That's super cool. But you know what isn't cool? That episode of Doctor Who where they went to the diamond planet and that one woman got possessed. That was the opposite of cool.

4. The footprints on the moon will be there for 100 million years.

JESS' INPUT: There's no atmosphere on the moon so the footprints there can't be eroded by wind or anything like that. So those footprints are going to be there for practically forever. Imagine being Buzz and Neil and being able to flex like that. I went to the grocery store the other day, accidentally dropped a jar of Marmite and then stood in it - so my footprint was there because the cashier couldn't handle the Marmite-y smell for long enough to clean it up and apparently I wasn't allowed to help for 'health and safety'. So at least my footprint is going to be imprinted somewhere. Just nowhere that's as cool as the moon.

5. The moon was once a piece of the earth.

JESS' INPUT: People think that there was some sort of collision which made a part of earth break off. They say it was an early protoplanet of Mars called Theia. Anyway, Theia made the moon break away from Earth but it stayed around to orbit us because of the Earth's gravitational pull. Don't you love the moon? She's a lesbian queen! Hey, maybe Theia had a crush on her or something and just went about it like, the wrong way.

6. There is floating water in space.

JESS' INPUT: Uh huh! So there's this massive water vapour cloud that astronauts found and it holds - oh my gosh, get reads for this - it holds 140 trillion times the mass of Earth's oceans. My head is honestly spinning just thinking about it. 140 trillion! That's crazy!

7. There is a volcano on Mars three times the size of Everest.

JESS' INPUT: Yep, her name is Olympus Mons and I would personally like to know why she didn't have a starring role in The Martian. Maybe it's because she would have easily outshined Matt Damon. Sorry, Matt.

8. In 3.75 billion years, the Milky Way and Andromeda Galaxies will collide.

JESS' INPUT: I'll be honest, my brain doesn't even know where to begin processing this. I can't... compute. What is this... I can't... Sorry, I'm shutting down. Jess out!

7 OREO FLAVOURS

7. Hot & Spicy Cinnamon Oreos. - you can pretend you can handle spicy food by eating one of these. and doesn't that make you look cultured, huh? still... it's a weird mix of flavours. 5/10. 6. Peeps Oreos. - a solid 7/10 for taste... but you still feel guilty about eating a fluffy marshmallow chicken, hence the low ranking. 5. Oreo Mini. - all the 10/10 taste of a regular oreo but they're tiny so it's very easy to hide them when you want to sneakily eat them in class! a solid 12/10 for being so gosh darn convenient. 4. Golden Oreos. - look, you were brought up in ireland and that means that sometimes you just really, really want a custard cream, okay? this is america's answer to that and it comes in a delicious, compact oreo form. *chef's kiss* exquisite. 8.5/10 3. Mint Oreos. - honestly, it's so easy to feel halfway to sophisticated when you eat one of these. a solid 9/10. 2. Red Velvet Oreos. - CREAM CHEESE IS THE PEOPLE'S CHEESE!!! 10/10!!!!!! 1. Cinnamon Bun Oreos. - you nearly cried when you tasted these for the first time. the sun was shining. obama was president. your skin was clear, your crops were growing. the promise of tomorrow was as bright and warm as the feeling in your chest when that cinnamon-y biscuit-y goodness first met your tastebuds. you could write an essay on cinnamon bun oreos. 100000/10.

6 FAMILY MEMBERS

1. Jensen Greenfeld

Your dad is probably your favourite person in the world. You'd do anything for him - including deferring your college acceptance to keep an eye on him, because that's what family does. He's your rock, your best friend, and he's the most giving person you've ever met in your life. He and your mum met in university when he studied abroad for a year and they were instantly best friends, keeping in touch long after they'd graduated and your dad moved back home. He knew your mum always wanted a kid and so he gave her you. It's unconventional, you know that, and most people raised their eyebrows at him helping another woman conceive in such a short time after his wife passed away, but that's the kind of person your dad is. Generosity helped him through his grief. How could anyone criticise that? He taught you how to ride a bike, change a leaky exhaust and adopted Comet for you so you wouldn't feel so lonely when you moved to New York to be with him. When he ended up in hospital, you were beside yourself. But not because you had to stay with him now instead of going to college like you'd planned. You could never begrudge him that, not when so much of his own life has been dedicated to making sure you were happy.

2. Magda McTaggert

Your mum has never had the easiest life. Disowned by her parents after she came out to them, she had to make her own way in the world. That's something you've never been able to relate to, because she made sure that you always had people who loved you. When you were sick as a kid, she stayed up with you every night, barely getting any sleep herself. She was your champion when you began to learn sign language, and she held your hand when the doctors first began talking about your cochlear implants. You miss her when she's in Ireland and you're in America, but she's only ever a Skype call away.

3. Kinsey McTaggert

Technically, Kinsey is your step-mother. But you rarely refer to her as that. She's your ma. She's been in your life since you were three-years-old so keeping her at arms-length with a 'step' term doesn't feel right to you when she's just as much your family as your mum and dad are. Sure, you'll call her by your first name but that's because Kinsey is so terrifyingly, inexplicably, astronomically cool. She's been managing bands for her whole life, she has pink hair and she let you come on tour when you were younger and being homeschooled. Your fondest memories are the tour bus with your mum and Kinsey and whatever up and coming rockers had adopted you as their little sister. Kinsey is the reason you felt alright leaving your mum behind to start school in America. You know she's in safe hands with her wife.

4. Michelle Greenfeld

Michelle has pretty much hated you since the day you were born. Perhaps 'hate' is a strong word, but she highly dislikes you and never let you forget the fact that you're only her half-sister. In some ways, you get it. You came into the family shortly after her mum had died. Her dad had a kid with another woman and, even though there were absolutely no romantic feelings involved, it still must have felt like a kick in the teeth. You try your best to be accommodating of her feelings because you know she's not all bad. The ways she treats Brendan and especially Gabby is proof of that. She can be the perfect big sister - unfortunately, just not to you.

5. Brendan Greenfeld

Brendan likes you though, and you're so happy about that. Brendan is exactly what you want in a big brother. He's protective and funny and taught you all the cheats for his video games, so you're basically unstoppable when it comes to Mario Kart now. He was also the one that told Gabby to shut up when she saw you for the first time after you lost your hearing. He took learning sign language in his stride and always makes sure there's room for you to sit at movie night. Sometimes you worry that, if it ever came down to it, he'd still pick Michelle over you - full sibling loyalty and all. But maybe that's doing Brendan an injustice, because he's never been anything other than the perfect big brother to you.

6. Gabby Greenfeld

Gabby is a sweetheart. She might be a little flaky at times and come out with mildly offensive things, but you know that she means well. Michelle is her favourite but she loves you as well, even if she often turns her nose up at your love for scrunchies and denim jackets. She'd rather get you to wear something sparkly and show-y and while you'll never say no to glitter, you don't think that Gabby's closet is quite for you. In fact, you're pretty sure only she can pull it off. Gabby is wild and free and doesn't care what anyone thinks of her. She's loving and loud and you want to make sure that you get to keep her around forever.

5 MEMORIES

memory one

You blush when Tor lets out a low whistle. "Some talent you've got there, Little J," he says. That makes you blush even more. Tor is just so nice. And has a handsome face. Kinsey says you're far too young to like boys yet and that you're far too smart to like someone like Tor. She says he goes through girls like a revolving door and you're not sure what that means, but you like the attention from him anyway. "I was just messing around," you smile, your fingers trailing over the keys again. He tips back his head and laughs. "Well, mess around anymore and I might be out of a job. Are you trying to upstage me?" Tor teases. Grinning, you shake your head and Serge wanders over. Normally, he's so tall and silent and sort of intimidating but his smile is warm when he reaches over to ruffle your hair. "Say the word and I'll kick Tor to the curb in an instant, Jess," he promises solemnly. You know that they're just joking, but it's nice to feel that sort of validation. Especially when you're a little kid and they're rockstars. That's why music is so special, it brings everyone together, even Irish Harry Potter enthusiasts and charming keyboardists with pretty eyes.

memory two

The headache has cleared up but you still feel groggy and confused and so you fall back asleep again, promising yourself that you'll ask after your mum when you wake up again. Because maybe then you'll be able to hear her. There's no such luck when you come to again. Everything is silent and it's too weird to even begin describing. You're confused at first but your mum's tears, your dad's shell-shocked expression and the grim line set around Kinsey's mouth helps you to put the pieces together. There's a kind looking doctor who's writing something on a notepad for you, and you already know what it's going to say before he places it in your lap. You've worked it out. You're deaf. It's as if years fall away from you at that moment. It's hard to reconcile the news with everything you know about yourself. Your whole childhood has been music and now what? That's gone away and you're just meant to be okay with it? How is that fair? With shaking hands, you take the pen from the doctor and write a reply. As soon as your mum reads it, she starts crying again but your dad finds it in himself to smile and he reaches over to squeeze your knee through the hospital bedsheets. He still has that piece of paper which is stupidly sentimental of him and you love him for it. It read: Okay. What's next?

memory three

At first, you were excited. After years of homeschooling, you're finally going to a proper high school and you get to see your dad every day. What's not to love about all of that? However, now that you're in New York, the nerves have started to settle in. What if no one wants to be your friend? What if the kids at school are weird about the deaf thing? What if they try and touch your implant? What if they don't let you join the soccer team even though Kinsey bought you new cleats specifically for that? Most of all, what if Michelle tries to smother you in your sleep? Your dad laughs when you voice that one aloud. "Don't you think you're being a little bit dramatic?" he asks you, fondly smoothing down your hair. You laugh along with him but you aren't so sure. That night at dinner, Michelle spears a meatball with her fork in such an aggressive manner, glaring at you all the while, that you think you're about to faint. No, you don't think you're being dramatic at all.

memory four

"Jess? Jess, are you alright?" At first, you can't even reply. You're too speechless. With shaking hands, you present him with the letter - your CalTech acceptance letter. Your dad cheers at once and he scoops you up into a hug and you think that you could just die of happiness right then and there. You're going to be studying aeronautical engineering. All of the hard work, the late night physics reading, the dedication to science club, the hours spent in your dad's garage understanding engines, the grease and oil covering your hands and your hair and your face. It was all worth it. And now it's one step closer to NASA.

memory five

A heart attack. Your dad isn't even old, and as far as you know he's always had a clean bill of health so what's changed. You stay silent all the way to the hospital and Brendan lets you. When you arrive, Gabby hugs you and even Michelle manages a watery smile your way. Then all four of you are allowed into see him. He's lying in bed, tubes attached to him, but he's sitting upright and he smiles at you, his kids, even if he does look sleepy. Then he cracks some sort of joke and hell if you can remember what it is. But that's what makes you cry. The idea of college goes flying right out the window. He argues with you, naturally. So you lie and tell him you were never that sure about it anyway. He doesn't believe you at first because that career path has been the only thing you've ever been sure about since you were 11-years-old. Maybe you're a good actress because eventually he relents and lets you stay with him. Or maybe, deep down, he's scared to be on his own now too.

4 CRUSHES

1. Tor Eklund

keyboard player for The Corkscrews

has the nicest set of teeth in the world

went through girls like a revolving door according to Kinsey

called you 'little J'

total dreamboat

saw you as a little sister

2. Graham O'Connell

striker for the boys football team in Ireland

had never seen or read Harry Potter but he had floppy hair so you were willing to make allowances

always complimented your football boots

was your first kiss

asked if the two of you could keep in touch when you moved to Canada

messaged you one day to say he'd started watching Harry Potter

you were overjoyed

messaged you again to say he didn't really like Remus Lupin

you well and truly dodged that bullet, didn't you?

3. Amanda Forbes

literally the prettiest girl you've ever seen in your life

was visiting Jasper in the summer with her family

was also a cheerleader

your bisexual awakening

said she wanted to kiss you because she had never kissed a girl before

kissed you lots of times that summer

ghosted you when she left and has a boyfriend now

well, fine then, Amanda

4. Steve Rogers aka Captain America

I mean, you're only bloody human, aren't you?

3 JOBS

1. Neighbourhood Dog Walker

You were fourteen. You needed some money. You loved dogs. It made perfect sense. All the neighbours trusted you to look after their pooches and you made about twenty different canine friends.

2. Apprentice Mechanic

When you told your dad you wanted to be an aeronautical engineer, he said that you needed hands on experience. It helped that he owned an auto shop. Convenient, right? He thought a week working alongside him would help you get to grips with things and prepare you for college. You kept working there for three years. You loved it so much.

3 Aeronatucial Engineer

With your dad on the mend, it doesn’t seem like such a pipe dream anymore. Now you’re at NYU and you feel lucky that they want you to study with them. It’s not CalTech but it’s still one step closer to NASA, and this way you still get to be close to your dad.

2 DOGS

1. Comet

2. Sirius

1 JESS

Bubbly, optimistic, generous, strong-willed, determined, resilient, resourceful, courageous, cheery, nurturing, reckless, stubborn, lacks self-awareness, self-conscious, easily influenced, cares too much about what other people think of her, total Gryffindor, eats too many Oreos, space nerd, deaf, soccer player, cheerleader, dog mom, half-Irish, half-American.

#muse;

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automatismoateo · 3 years ago

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In response to a question in a recent thread where someone asked me to go in-depth, here's a description of my experience in Education and teaching Science in Arkansas and why I finally quit. via /r/atheism

Submitted July 11, 2021 at 11:22PM by paxinfernum (Via reddit https://ift.tt/3ALPxPr) In response to a question in a recent thread where someone asked me to go in-depth, here's a description of my experience in Education and teaching Science in Arkansas and why I finally quit.

The only thing that matters

Here's something you need to understand first. In most rural districts, pretty much any idiot can get hired to a position and stay there as long as they don't piss off parents too much. The people hiring you don't really understand what you teach, and the parents don't understand or care what quality teaching is, but they care if you say something that offends their backward sensibilities. What that effectively means is that your ability to teach and stay on has more to do with being in sync with the community, who are usually racist and batshit paranoid. If you aren't in sync with that, you either have to keep your head down, or you will eventually get harassed into leaving due to vague complaints.

Abusive parenting is normal here

Okay. So starting with my student teaching. The woman I worked under was a total fucking psychopath. She bragged in the teachers' lounge about how she disciplined her daughter and people don't discipline their kids like that now. By discipline, I mean she told a story about how she chased her daughter down a hallway, dragged her by the hair of her head, and spanked her until she was raw. This was part of a story where she was bragging about how well behaved her daughter was due to her parenting.

If you're wondering if anyone pushed back against this, the answer is that they didn't. They were nodding their heads in affirmation. That's the problem with rural schools in a nutshell. The community hires from the community, and the community is backward as shit and filled with people who were raised in abusive conservative fundie homes. The parents, by the way, loved that teacher because she wasn't one of those soft "liberal" teachers. Parents, more than anyone else, wanted us to hit their kids and were always disappointed when they didn't get spanked. Child abuse is a way of life down here.

Teachers who are fearful of knowledge

Okay, so this woman was a science teacher. That's what I trained to teach. Science. I did so because I wasn't just one of those "science is awesome" Sagan-heads. I genuinely cared about teaching science as more than just fun facts, but as a methodology for uncovering the truth. I naively went into the field thinking that's what most science teachers would be like. I kind of hoped that I'd at least find a community of like-minded individuals in this ignorant state.

Over my entire teaching career, I literally never met another science teacher like me who was pro-science and pro-skepticism. They were overwhelmingly either just dumb and teaching rotely, or they were conspiratorial and fearful of science. This is exactly what an Arkansas school board wants out of a science teacher. They know they have to teach science, but they are afraid of science and see it as the most dangerous subject to teach in their little fundagelical minds. So they hire people who are afraid of science.

That crazy woman I trained under? She ranted about drones being used to spy on us. She told the kids GMOs were dangerous, and she told them homeopathic medicines were something she'd researched to help her friend with cancer. She wasn't unique in that regard. Every other science teacher I met in Arkansas was terrified of GMOs and had some conspiracy they wanted to rant about. One teacher's bugaboo was allergies and how he thought more people were getting allergies because of chemicals being put in the water. He brushed it off when I said it was probably due to more sensitive testing. Another teacher told their students the most horrendous and completely inaccurate facts about nuclear energy.

They're not sending us their best people

The point is these people weren't the best and brightest. Often, they weren't even adequate. One guy I worked with became a science teacher because he needed something to teach alongside coaching. He was dumb as a box of rocks and just barely passed his praxis exams after three tries. I know most people weren't going to ace these tests like I did, but the cutoff for a passing score in Arkansas is hilariously low. Yet, when he finally passed, it was only by a single point, and he recounted it to me like it was only by the grace of god.

Another teacher, a math teacher who was probably the worst speller I'd ever met, got certified in Texas, which has a lower standard for math, and he transferred his certification to Arkansas. So he only was able to teach math in Arkansas on a technicality. The way it works is that you only have to be recertified if you let your certification lapse. All that's required to recertify is doing 30 hours of PD per year, and then, every couple of years, you have to do the recertification process. But this idiot was too stupid to do that, and he let his certification expire. So then, he was teaching math without a license because he couldn't pass the Arkansas tests. (You're allowed to teach for so long as long as you're pursuing certification.)

Propaganda and Indoctrination

Half of the teachers I met might as well have been missionaries. It's illegal to push your religion or politics on students, but fuck if anyone will actually enforce that. Actually, let me step back there. Fuck if anyone will actually enforce that unless you're liberal or non-Christian. The state is an unofficial conservative theocracy so if the teacher wants to rant about gays or Jesus, there's very little chance any parent will even bother to complain. (Even liberals around here know they're outnumbered and won't win.) Even if the parent complains to the Principal, they'll only "have a word" with the teacher in question, most likely to have a chummy conversation where they eye roll about the parent and discuss ways they can continue to evangelize more subtly.

Even if the Principal is the type who takes this seriously, the teacher will only get a vague note in their file because no school board around here is going to fire a teacher for proselytizing children. They don't want the school to get burned down by an angry mob of Fox News zombies. Even if it makes it to the state ethics board, I've seen the state ethics board literally do nothing about a counselor who ignored a suicidal student, a teacher who was caught drunk driving, a superintendent who was manipulating the system to siphon more money into the school, and so many other things. The only thing the ethics board actually takes a license away for is cheating on standardized testing (got to keep our corporate donors happy) and actually fucking a student. Even if you bring a teacher up on proselytizing, they'll get a warning and be back in the classroom the next day.

So if you're a kid in a rural school, get ready for your teacher to unsubtly tell you about how Jesus is such an important part of their life or straight-up rant about the Democrats. When I was a student in Arkansas schools, I had teachers tell me: 1) All gay people should be thrown in prison 2) HIV-positive patients should be shipped to an island or burned (it was the 90s) 3) the Jews brought the holocaust on to themselves by rejecting Jesus 4) the teacher was boycotting Levis jeans because they supported gay people. That's just a sampling of shit I heard as a kid in Arkansas from freaking teachers.

While working as a teacher, I knew of teachers who latched onto kids with poor home lives and invited them over to their homes so they could do "prayer studies" with them. The kids went because they were kind to them and offered food. In case you're wondering, they got away with this because it was a husband and wife, so parents allowed it. (I'm just going to say that I'm actually quite certain this was entirely above board sex-wise. I knew the individuals, and while I despised what they were doing, I knew they were entirely sincere.)

Another teacher, a Trump supporter, went into a rant about how they needed to give all the teachers guns to fight off school shooters (because restricting guns in any way was tOtAlItArIaNiSm.) I nodded along because I was smart enough to know disagreeing publicly will get you shunned or harassed. All I could think in my head was "Dude, if they ever give you nutters guns, that's the day I quit. There will be 10 dead kids within a week." On that topic, one teacher I know of grabbed a student by the throat because they were pissed at them, and they didn't lose their job.

The history teacher, the one who wanted us to all have guns was teaching that the Civil War was about tariffs. You heard it here first, ladies and gentlemen. Hundreds of thousands of people went to war over tariffs that were at their lowest point in decades. It had nothing to do with the people they owned and shackled up like a Saw movie. The Civics teacher pushed Trump election conspiracies.

Another teacher, who had a family member who had a terminal illness and was literally only getting their medical treatment paid through Obamacare would go off on rants about Obama and transgender students.

Harassment

At one point, I was harassed by the campus cop. He found out I was in support of BLM, and literally screamed at me. Later, he transitioned to simply refusing to acknowledge my existence. Like, if I said anything to him, he would pretend he couldn't hear me. The dude was fucking insane and filled with hate. I'm pretty sure his domestic situation with his wife was abusive due to things he said. He was so angry and radicalized that it was never the students I worried would be a mass shooter. It was him. I was literally afraid he would come in one day and shoot the place up. He wasn't an oddity though. Every one of our resource officers was racist and unethical. One was running a vaping ring with students. Another took special joy in cracking down on Latino students.

Eventually, I started getting harassment from students though, and that's what led to me leaving. There are two things that led to increasing harassment. First, I had one conservative student who hated me and surmised that I must be a Clinton supporter. I never said that, but because I was one of the few teachers who didn't violate the rules about discussing religion or politics, they guess that I was a liberal atheist. So they started working to get me fired.

The second thing is that the Arkansas standards changed so that teaching evolution became part of my classroom standards. Just so you know, most schools in Arkansas don't actually teach evolution, even though they're supposed to. The way it works is teachers put it last on their things to teach, and oopsie, I just ran out of time at the end of the year. Some teachers know evolution is real, but they don't teach it because the backlash is too much to take. Others don't teach it because they're fundagelicals themselves, so they go along with the informal conspiracy to not teach evolution. I say informal conspiracy because it's not like they all get together in a back room and decide this. It's just the culture and incentives are all there to not teach it.

I actually taught evolution, and while I had always dealt with some degree of negativity, looking back, I have to say that was the point where I started getting a lot more. I can't emphasize enough how brainwashed these kids were. I'm not saying all of them because there were absolutely kids who believed in evolution, but they were in a minority and knew to keep their mouths shut. But it's sort of staggering to try to teach the history of the Earth and have a kid repeatedly try to prove to you that there was a global flood.

How harassment actually works in the real world

This is the thing I want people to understand. Harassment in the real world isn't usually as obvious as in a movie. No one drives by your house and throws a brick through your window. No one calls you up and leaves threatening messages. No one will ever fire you for being liberal or an atheist. Because these people are dumb as fuck, but they're also very clever at being shitty people. They know they can't walk up and say to the school board, "Fire so and so because they're teaching evolution." They know that's illegal technically.

So they just start making up vague complaints. Principals, even ones who were supportive like my last Principal, are reactive. If a parent comes to them to complain about a teacher, they're going to assume the teacher did something wrong and needs to be talked to. So the girl who found out I was a Hillary Clinton supporter suddenly decided I "made her uncomfortable" and "looked her weird." The great thing about these types of innuendos and character assaults is that you don't have to provide any real facts. It's all about how you just don't like that person. Remember that teachers are one of the few professions where you can actually be fired simply because the community doesn't like you.

So that fell flat because, like I said, my Principal was actually decent and understood how flimsy that was. So then, that girls boyfriend made a complaint about how I'd yelled at him in front of all the students. Unfortunately for him, this supposed incident happened while we were in a part of the school with cameras so it was obviously bullshit. However, parents calling in upset is still a big deal so I was told that I should try to be nicer to him in the future and win the parents over.

The point is that it's basically death by a thousand cuts from little gripes and exaggerated concerns. Another student flat-out lied and said I cussed them out in class. I know that some of this was actually instigated by a staff member who didn't like me. So they encourage students to complain about me. At one point, I know they actually set up a kid's parents to lodge a complaint against me. I know this because the language of the complaint was obviously written by them, and when I was having the parent conference, they actually stayed behind work (something they never did) and didn't leave our adjoining rooms until it was over. They apparently wanted to listen in and see how it went. This conservative teacher at various times: told me the wrong place for a meeting, got kids to say they would show up for an after school event and then not show up, convinced an entire group of students to quit a club I was sponsoring, spread rumors about me to parents.

I'm done

The final straw was covid. I tried to stick it out, but the day a kid told me he wasn't going to wear a mask because "Biden isn't the real President" was the point where I decided I was done. This came from teachers too. The biology teacher wore a mask below their nose. The staff refused to stop having potlucks throughout the entire pandemic. Some people can't be saved.

edit: I forgot to mention the English teacher I met while I was doing my student-teacher training. She was forcing her class to write essays on how Obama wasn't a real US Citizen. All throughout my teacher program, I'd been told over and over that you could get fired for talking politics in the classroom, and this bitch was literally forcing kids to write essays about how Obama was a secret Muslim. And nothing was done about it. She could get away with it because Arkansas is so white and racist. To put it into context, the county she was teaching in was 94% white and voted for Trump by 78% in 2020.

#reddit

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bazypitchandsimonsnow · 7 years ago

Text

Catching a Cold

Rating: T

Genre: Fluff/Angst

Word count: 4589

Summary: Simon gets a terrible, destructive cold.

Read on AO3

AN: Wow another long one. Not as long as flowers, but still pretty long. Hope you enjoy it :)

Simon

I wake up feeling like my head is filled with cotton and my nose is on fire. Clear snot drips out of onto the pillow below. It even hurts to breathe.

“Shit,” I mutter. My voice is high pitch and clogged. I cough and green mucus comes out. Crowley, of all the things that could get me, and it’s fucking a cold.

And like my day couldn’t get any worse, Baz walks out of the bathroom, looking impeccable as always. He looks at me with a disgusted frown.

“What the fuck is wrong with you?” He says.

“I have a cold,” I say.

“Obviously. You sound horrible.”

“Fuck off.” I wish I could sound more intimidating but my voice makes that impossible.

Baz chuckles. “That barely works when you’re healthy, Snow. Nice try.”

“Hey you-” A tickling in my nose makes me stop. I feel the sneeze building bit by bit. But something else builds too. Like a charge in the pit of stomach. It’s too late when I realise what it is.

“ACHOO!” The air explodes around me. Streaks of lightning shoot out in every direction. Baz ducks for cover, hands braced on his head. Once my vision clears, I look around. The walls are singed and there’s electricity still swirling around my head.

“Aleister fucking Crowley, Snow!” Baz shouts as he stands back. “What the fuck was that?!”

“Um, I think my magic is, uh...reacting to the cold.”

Baz groans and shakes his head. “As if you weren’t destructive enough already.”

“Hey! It’s not my fault! I-” Oh no, the tickling starts again. Baz’s eyes go wide with fear.

“Shit,” he hisses. “Snow, press your tongue behind your top two teeth.”

“Wha-”

“Just do it!”

I press the tip of my tongue there as hard I can. I feel like an idiot. But then, the tickle start to fades and eventually goes away completely. Once fully gone, I let out a sigh, as does Baz. I wipe the snot away and turn to him.

“Now what was that?” I ask.

“My little sister has very severe allergies in the spring. My step-mother uses that trick to stop her sneezing fits. Luckily it works on large children as well as small ones.”

I glare as best I can with bloodshot eyes. Baz is certainly not intimidated though. I stand up out of bed, but the entire world suddenly decides to tilt sideways. Everything is topsy turvy. I stumble forward, about to fall on my face, until two strong hands grip my shoulders to steady me.

“Whoa whoa, don’t stand up.” Baz’s voice is surprisingly soft. There’s barely an edge to it. “Get back on the bed.”

I sit on the mattress, my head hanging down. Everything is still spinning. I try to focus on the floor for some semblance of stability.

“I’m going to try a spell,” he says, still soft. “Get well soon!”

His magic hits me like a heatwave and wraps around my body like a warm blanket. But the warmth slides off me, pooling at my feet.

“Hmph. Why isn’t it working?”

“My body knows I hate you,” I chuckle. “Doesn’t want your help.”

Baz growls. “Or maybe your magic agitating cold is spell proof. You’re going to have to get over it the old fashioned way, I guess .”

I groan. “I have a project to hand in though.”

“I’ll do that,” Baz replies. “Just get back in bed, you idiot.”

“But-”

“No buts. Lie down, now.”

With one last annoyed humph, I do as he says. The usually annoyingly lumpy pillow feels like a goddamn cloud now. I sigh and snuggle into it. Baz carefully pulls the blanket up to my shoulders. I open my eyes, but my vision is too blurry to see his face clearly. I wonder what he looks like, how he’s looking at me. I frown.

“Why are you doing this? You could kill me right now, easily”

“Because you’re utterly helpless right now. And despite your deluded opinion of me, I’m not a complete monster. I won’t kick a man when he’s down. Plus the sooner you get better, the sooner I won’t have to worry about being hit by a stray lightning bolt.”

I huff, closing my eyes. “Right. Don’t want to be a pile of ash.”

He scoffs. “Go to sleep, Snow.” With that, I hear him walk away. Once the door is closed, I let myself relax. I bury my face into the pillow and drift away into sleep.

“Snow? Snow? Simon, wake up.”

I blink open my gummy eyes. There’s little sunlight coming in through the window. Crowley, I must’ve slept the whole day away. Baz is leaning over me. And I swear he almost looks concerned. Probably just afraid I’ll fry him with my literally explosive sneeze.

“You just called me Simon,” I mumble.

“No, I didn’t. You’re sick and obviously hallucinating.”

Baz is holding stuff in his hands. A stack of papers in one, and a large ceramic bowl in the other. I squint at the bowl.

“What’s that?”

He holds up the paper. “Your homework. Of course it will only be of use if you decide to do it.”

I shake my head. “Not that, arsehole. The bowl.”

Baz places the papers on his side table and lowers the bowl towards my face. The smell of salty broth wafts its way into my stuffed nose.

“Soup,” Baz says. “Compliments of Cook Pritchard. I told her how utterly pathetic you were, plus how imperative it is you get better before burning the whole school to the ground. So she made you soup. Now sit up and drink it.”

With immense effort, I sit up on my bed. The room isn’t spinning as much as before, so that’s a good sign. Baz carefully places the soup in my lap and puts a spoon in my hand. I swear his fingers linger on mine, but it’s so brief I must be hallucinating more. I take a cautious sip. It tastes great. I hum in approval.

“Good?” Baz asks.

“Very,” I reply, taking another sip. The warmth it clears my aching head slightly, enough to let a sudden thought to smash in. I inhale sharply, which causes another coughing fit, and a curious look from Baz.

“You alright, Snow?”

“Oh Crowley,” I rasp out. “Did you tell Penny I’m here? She’s probably going to freak out.”

Baz rolls his eyes. “Of course. Bunce ambushed me after class, demanding I tell her where you are or she’d smite me where I stood. I told her, she didn’t believe me, then I told her again and swore on my mother’s grave, and then she was convinced.”

I sigh. “Oh thank Merlin. Is she coming up here? I’m guessing she wants to come up here.”

“She wanted to. But I told her we should keep you in quarantine for now in case anyone else could get the more violent symptoms.”

“You’re not worried about getting sick yourself?”

“I don’t get sick.”

I nod slowly. “Right. Because you’re a vampire.”

Baz glares, seemingly trying to murder me with just his gaze. “ Because, I have a good immune system. Now drink the rest of that soup. It will keep you hydrated and give you nutrients.”

With an annoyed huff, I keep drinking it. I’ll admit, it does make me feel better. Soon I look back up at Baz, still sitting on his bed facing me. “How are you so good at this?”

“I have four younger siblings, Snow. If one of them gets sick, they all get sick. And since I never do, I help my parents.”

“Yeah, but you don’t have to help me.”

He makes a “pfft” noise, blowing a strand of hair out of his face. “Magically destructive illness means automatic truce in my book. And I told you, I’m not a complete monster.”

He doesn’t say anything else. Just keeps sitting there, silent, frowning slightly (but his face always looks like that). He doesn’t elaborate, leaving that statement hanging in the air. And honestly, I’m not sure if he’s trying to convince me or himself with it.

“Alright,” I finally say. “Truce. Until I’m not at risk of blowing you up.”

He nods once curtly. “Good. Glad that’s settled, Snow.”

I slurp down the last of the soup. (It’s really good.) Baz makes a disgusted noise at my manners. But he still takes the empty soup bowl from me and puts it on my desk. I lie back down.

“Now,” I say. “What did I miss in class?”

Baz raises an eyebrow. “You really care?”

I shrug. “I need something to sleep off my cold. Schoolwork is boring enough to send me right back to dreamland.”

“You really plan to sleep through your entire illness?”

“It’s only a cold. Should be gone in a day or two.”

“Achoo!”

Boom! A lightning bolt assaults the opposite wall and the black mark gets bigger. Five days. I’ve been sick for five fucking days and the only good thing is that I've figured out how to make my electric sneezes focused in one area. Now it just shoots out in front of me. Still makes Baz flinch though, understandably. He does so just as another sneeze bolt lets loose.

“Aleister Crowley, Snow,” he says from his bed. “Are you getting any better?”

“Obviously not,” I grumble, blowing my nose again.

“This is so weird. If this is a normal cold, then why won’t it go away?”

“Your guess is as good as mine.”

I flop down on the bed and groan. This is a nightmare. Penelope is pretty sure I have some unknown magical plague. She’s researching every minute outside of class. Agatha convinced Baz to bring me scones along with the daily soup. The Mage would care if he was bloody well around.

Baz has been surprisingly understanding. He brings the aforementioned soup and scones everyday, tells me what I missed in class, and even wrote out an assignment for me I dictated to him. Merlin, he even edited it for me. I really wonder, is this Baz pretending to be a nice person? Or is this how he actually acts but just treats me like crap? Am I the exception or the rule?

Either way, I think I like...this. This weird illness inducing truce. I definitely like it better than fighting.

“I feel like death,” I whine.

“You’re not dying, Snow,” Baz replies.

“How do you know, Mr. Smartypants?”

“Because I’m supposed to kill you. And the universe is not kind enough to let you die of a cold before I can do so.”

I roll onto my side so I can see him better. He’s reading his book with a completely blank expression. No indication he’s bothered by what he just said. It bothers me though. Usually I wouldn’t say anything, just accept it and move on. Maybe it’s my cold messing with my head, but I can’t let it go.

“You really think that?” I mumble. “That we’re going to kill each other?”

Baz flicks his eyes over to me. “Don’t you?”

I shrug. “I know I’m supposed to. It’s what everyone says. But I don’t know.” I look down at my bedsheet, tracing circles in the fabric. “I...I don’t think I'd want to now. You’ve been so nice to me through all of this. Why would I kill someone who’s being so nice to me?”

He scoffs. “Because I’m a Pitch and you’re the Mage’s heir. We’re doomed to die by each other’s hand. If the Humdrum doesn’t get you first.”

“Stop talking like your father and talk like yourself,” I snap.

He doesn't say anything for too long. I slowly lift up my head. Baz is looking at me, and it’s not with disgust, or contempt, or even blank resignation. In fact, he looks almost...pained. His eyes are round and open, his lips pressed together in a thin line. He’s got a death grip on his book so hard his knuckles are ghost white. It’s like he wants to say something but he can’t get it out. The anxious ache in my stomach grows with every passing second.

“Simon-”

Then I sneeze.

It comes out of nowhere. The bolt sails towards Baz’s head. He yelps and ducks down just in time. When he looks back up, it’s with the familiar expression of contempt.

“Fucking Merlin and Morgana, Snow!” He roars. “You nearly killed me!”

“I’m sorry!” I shout back.

“I don’t fucking care how sorry you are! If I’m going to die it will not be by your idiotic cold!”

“It was an accident.”

“Like hell it was,” he snarls. “Thought you could lull me into a false sense of security then get me, huh? Nice try, Chosen One.”

I gape at him. Does he really think I’d do that? That I’m capable of something so manipulative? “N-No of course not. I-I- How could you- I would-”

“Shut the fuck up you stupid stuttering numpty!”

He pushes himself off the bed and stomps to the door.

“W-Where are you going?”

“Out,” he mutters. “Away from you.”

With that, he walks out and slams the door closed with enough force to shake the room. I’m left there, frozen, in too much shock to move. What the hell just happened? It was an accident, I know it was. But my stupid words wouldn’t work like usual. And now he’s gone. There’s nothing I can do.

Slowly, I lay back down on my bed and stare out the window. I don’t cry. I just let myself wallow in self pity. Mentally hitting myself for doing that. Fuck, we were getting somewhere, and I messed it up. Messed it up like I always mess up everything.

I really am the worst chosen one that’s ever been chosen.

Baz hasn’t spoken to me in two days. Fuck, he hasn’t even so much as looked at me. No more homework help or soup. (Penny’s been bringing food instead.) It’s all just unbelievably tense silence. He stays out of the room too, goes out at night for longer that he ever has before. Like right now.

I’m on my back, staring at the ceiling. I’m surrounded by snotty tissues. I can’t sleep. That stupid day is still mulling around in my head all this time. It was an accident. I know it was...right? I didn’t mean to. The sneeze just came out of nowhere, no warning. I didn’t want to hurt Baz. It’s just this stupid cold.

What if it was subconscious? What if deep down I did? Oh god, am I really that much of a monster inside? I can’t be, I can’t be, I can’t-

I can’t breathe.

I bolt up and put a hand to my chest. It’s like there’s an elephant on my lungs. The whole world is spinning. The horrible thoughts keep bashing into me over and over again. You’re evil, you’re a monster, you tried to kill him after all he did to help you. It’s like the world’s worst time loop. Every inhale is a struggle. My magic reacts with me, pushing to the surface, making my skin simmer and glow. Fuck, I think I’m about to go off.

“Snow? Simon!”

Baz’s voice is distant to me. I faintly hear him run to my bed. He crashes onto the mattress, eyes wild with fear.

“Baz,” I choke out. “Can’t- Can’t breathe.”

“Oh my god, oh my god,” he mutters. “Is it your cold?”

“N-No. Head. T-Thinking- Won’t stop.”

Baz’s fear fades slightly. He looks more determined than anything. Suddenly, he takes my head between his hands, looking me right in the eye. (I think he does, it’s all too spinny.)

“Simon,” he says firmly. “You’re having a panic attack, okay? I need you to try to calm down and control your breathing.”

I try to wrangle in my mind but it won’t listen. The thoughts slip out of my grasp every time. My body keeps heating up. I shake my head violently.

“C-Can’t.’

“Shit,” he hisses. After a second, he grabs my wrists presses both my hands to his cool chest. “Simon, I want you to feel me breathe and try to sync up with it, okay?”

I nod vigorously.

“Alright. Listen to my voice, feel my lungs. In,” he inhales, “1,2,3. Out,” he exhales, “1,2,3.”

I focus on the feeling under my palms. It’s the only constant, grounding thing I can detect at the moment. In, 1,2,3, out, 1,2,3. Baz does it over and over again, keeping his grip on my wrists tight. Before I know it, I’m breathing just like him, my magic isn’t about explode, and the world isn’t spinning anymore.

I can finally see Baz’s face clearly. I’ve never seen him so scared, eyes wide and brows near his hairline. He hasn’t let go of me. But...I really don’t want him to, actually. His touch keeps me steady. It reminds me of the real world. That I didn't really kill him.

“You okay?” He says softly. I nod, and he sighs, the fear sliding off his face. “Thank Merlin.”

The exhaustion washes over me. This whole experience has completely drained me. I can’t help but yawn.

“Go to bed, Snow.” Baz starts to let go of my wrists. I inhale sharply. No, he can’t leave now. The second lets go I feel untethered, weightless, like I could drown in my own mind again.

“No,” I say, grabbing Baz’s hands tightly. He looks at me curiously. “Don’t go.”

“Snow, wha-”

“You’re, you’re keeping me grounded. Just stay. Please.”

Baz looks at me for what feels like eternity. His lips hang open. I watch his eyes for a sign of choice. He’s probably going to shove me away. Call me an idiot or something. The last thing I expect is for him to sigh and nod slowly.

“Alright,” he whispers. “Just face the other way in case of a sneeze.”

I nod back. “Okay.”

I lay down on my side, facing the window. I brush the snotty tissues onto the floor, giving me a better view of the twinkling stars. After hearing the sound of Baz kicking off his shoes, I feel the mattress shift as he lays down next to me. We’re still holding each other's hand. I refuse to let go. But it’s more awkward now, my arm bent behind me. It’s definitely preventing me from falling asleep.

Fuck it. I grunt and pull our hands in front of myself, putting Baz’s arm across my waist. He lurches forward as a result, inhaling sharply. His chest is maybe a millimeter from touching my back. Our bodies are practically lined up.

“Snow, what are you-”

“Can’t sleep if my arm twisted,” I mutter. “Neither can you.”

He humphs annoyedly, but doesn’t move. Our fingers are weaved together, resting in front of my stomach. I can feel his breath hit the back of my neck, sending a warm shiver down my spine. Usually, Baz’s constant presence makes me tense, like I’m walking on eggshells or a minefield. But now, it’s the exact opposite. I don’t feel panicked or drowning as long as I can hear him breathing and feel his skin on mine. Clinging to his hand, it’s like clinging to a life raft.

“Goodnight, Baz.”

“Night...Simon.”

I squeeze his palm once, just lightly. And I swear he squeezes back.

I wake up just before dawn. Orange light is dancing on the horizon outside the window. There’s a weight across my side. And something warm on my back. Something warm and breathing.

Oh. Right.

Baz has moved closer in his sleep, (though he didn’t have to move that much in the first place.) His nose is nudged into my neck, his chest pressed against my spine. Our legs are tangled together. We’re still holding hands too, together arms across my side, fingers interlocked.

Basilton Grimm-Pitch is sleeping next to me. Curled up next to me. And it feels...really nice. I like him like this. Under my thumb, under my hand. Not off plotting or hurting others or hurting himself. Part of me wants to never let him move from here ever again.

I let go of his hand and slowly turn to face him. He’s breathing evenly, lips slightly open (and he calls me a mouth breather.) He looks so relaxed, and kind of, pretty. His hair is all mussed, raven strands hanging in his face. The dawn light makes his pale skin practically glow. Maybe I never will let him get up. Maybe I’ll just keep looking at him for eternity.

His eyes blink open. And slowly, they focus on me. He looks very shocked for a second, but then he relaxes as the memory of last night returns. Though his eyes still look a bit scared.

“You’re still here,” I whisper. “You stayed all night.”

“You begged me to stay,” he replies, voice equally low.

“But you didn’t have to.”

He shrugs, something he rarely does. “I’m allowed to be nice sometimes.”

“You keep saying that. Maybe...you’re just a nice person.”

“Am not.” His nose curls up in disgust. “Stop trying to ruin my reputation, Snow.”

“Actually, I really think you are.” I trace a finger down his jaw and his breath hitches. “You’re a nice person, Baz. A good person.”

I run my finger up and down, and his eyes flutter shut. He lets out a shuddering sigh. I feel his hand clench behind me. His face pulls in, like he’s in pain. No, I don’t want him to be hurting. So I move my hand upward and rub his forehead with my thumb. Trying to erase his tense lines with my touch. Slowly, his grip loosens, the lines fade, and his eyes open, just halfway.

“Simon...” he sighs.

Then I kiss him.

I don’t exactly know why. The impulse enters my mind and suddenly my lips are pressed against his. A still, chaste kiss. Baz inhales sharply, head pulling back slightly. For a second I think he’s going to push me off. That I’ve made an enormously stupid mistake and now Baz is going to fry me alive for it.

But then he pushes back. He grabs my shirt at the small of my back and hauls me even closer to him. It’s like there’s a fire burning between us. Growing bigger with every way mouths move, slotting together like that’s all they’re meant to do. Baz’s hand presses hard into my lower back, like he’s making sure I’m really here.

I wonder how long he’s wanted this. I wonder how long I’ve wanted this. I’d say I didn’t, but then why is there this list in my head of all the things I’ve always wanted to do to Baz? Like this.

I push my hand into Baz’s hair. It’s smooth and slips through my fingers, just like I always thought it would. I clench my fist and shove his face into mine. Suddenly, he breaks off.

“Sorry,” I say (I’m out of breath, it’s embarrassing.)

“No, it’s... How’s your cold? Do you still feel sick?”

I raise an eyebrow. “Worried about catching? I thought you didn’t get sick.”

“I don’t. But a lightning sneeze could turn me into a pile of ash.

Oh right. I’ve completely forgot about my cold until now. I take a breath through my nose, and though it's not exactly clear, it's better than before. My throat isn’t as scratchy either. I smile, earning a confused look from Baz.

“Actually,” I say, “I’m feeling a lot better. I think you might be curing me.”

He rolls his eyes. “Don’t be ridiculous, Snow.”

“You called me Simon before.”

“No, I didn’t.”

“Baz .” I cup his cheek. The annoyance drains from his face with a single sigh. Crowley, who knew one touch could make him relax like this? He puts his hand over mine, long fingers around me.

“Simon,” he says softly. “What are you doing?”

“Holding your face, obviously.”

“No. I mean, what is this?” He gestures between us. “Is this just an impulsive illness induced decision? Or...something else?”

I chew on my bottom lip, and sigh. “Well, I’m usually unsure of most things. But, I’m sure that I like this. I like you. I like you being nice to me, I like being nice to you. I like knowing you’re okay. These past few days, when I thought I almost killed you, I thought I was going to lose my mind. Fuck, I had a bloody panic attack over it. And I’m so sorry for that, I really am. I just, I know I like this better than fighting.” I bend my head down, too scared to look him in the eye. “Do...do you?”

Baz lets go of my hand, and for a second I think he’s going to push me away. Tell me that he hates me, that he hopes I rot in hell after putting me there. But then he grabs my chin and tilts my head back up to face him. His mouth is stern, determined, but his grey eyes are soft. Softer than I’ve ever seen them before. He traces his index slowly up my jawline. When his fingers tangle in my hair, it sends a shudder down my spine.

“Yes,” he breathes. “I do. Of course I do. Crowley, I've always wanted this.”

I’m taken aback by that, eyes widening. “Really?”

“Yes. Almost since we met.”

My breath hitches. His utter candor hits me right in the heart. For once, there’s nothing guarded about his face. He’s not hiding behind a bored expression anymore. He’s letting himself be vulnerable to me. And I like it. I don’t want him to hide from me anymore.

I grab the back of Baz’s neck and tap my forehead against his. He takes a deep breath, his eyes fluttering shut. Dragging his hand down my spine, he settles his palm against the small of my back.

“Then let's have this, Baz,” I whisper.

"Simon," he sighs. "I do want this, I really do. But there’s still a lot of stuff in our way. You have to know that.”

“Of course I know. But...we can do it, right? We can figure it all out. If we can get through this shitty destructive cold, we can get through anything.”

Baz chuckles, shaking his head against mine. “I think an impending civil war and a super villain are a bit more difficult.”

I shrug. “Yeah, I guess. But we’ll have each others backs. We can beat it together. And for now, let’s just...” I sigh, letting my eyes fall shut. “Let’s worry about all that later, alright? I don’t want to think about tomorrow. I want it to be just us for now.”

He smiles softly, eyes opening just a bit. He pushes us closer together. I bury my face in his neck, and he pushes his nose into my hair.

“Yes. Let’s, just be us right now.”

“Good.”

So we just lay there, holding each other, letting the world happen around us while we stay still. Because while we’re here, we’re not the Chosen One and the Pitch heir. We’re just two boys who care about each other with all the time in the world.

I've hated being in this bed the past week. But now I never want leave it again.

AN: Yeah it got super sappy at the end, I know. I'm a sap king/queen. Next up: side characters!

#carry on countdown #coc 2017 #carry on #snowbaz #simon snow #baz pitch #sick fic #fluff #angst #mysnowbazfic

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smokeybrandcompositions · 4 years ago

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Allegiance

This might come across a little tin-foil hat but i think, if you take the time to actually pay attention, it makes sense. Why the f*ck are the Feds pushing so hard for kids to go back to school, especially when education is usually the first aspect of those budgets slashed? You'd think this would be a prime opportunity to just rob that allocation blind. How can kids being forced back to school during a re-surging pandemic, affect a dwindling economy in the same way as Billy-Bob prematurely forcing his way back into those coal mines? It doesn't. So why are these motherf*ckers pushing so hard to get school age children, not high schoolers or college age students, f*cking children-children, back into those overcrowded, underfunded, classes? Indoctrination. The system will be shattered if you can't get those insidious ass ideas like "Working for the weekend" and "Obey", all of that counter-humanity, capitalist rhetoric, installed early on. If you told adult me that everything I was taught, outside of hard math and verifiable scientific method, was colored with an aggressive shade of 'Murrica, I'd tell you to f*ck right of with your bias. That doesn't happen with a six-year-old. They're forced to “pledge allegiance to the Flag.” At six, under duress; The threat of being chastised for "disrupting class. I can't consent, sign legal contracts, or tie my f*cking shoes at six, but I am okay to pledge my undying allegiance to this country, right? And I'm supposed to trust that this system is going to teach me, and my impressionable children, a well rounded, honest, worldly take on education? Word? If you have state and federal sanctioned learning plans, which most schools do whether they want to admit it or not, you have a focused, organized, delivery system for straight up propaganda and control. If that system is there, ready to be utilized, do you really think it won't be? This is the same government that Gerrymanders every voting district it can to influence elections. I've spoken before about how i learned everything i know outside of school. I learned about the Japanese concentration camps and the Tulsa riots in a library, on my own. Not a whiff of that stuff in my history textbooks. The story of Rosewood was found by that film's director, on accident. Rosewood was effectively erased from US history until this old ass white woman In the south, made a mistake while helping dude research. In a library. On his own. Had that lady not misunderstood his request for materials, Rosewood would still be buried. How much more of that sordid US history has been “lost?” What would happen if everyone learned outside of school, free from the edited versions the State wants to push, like i did when i was young?

Motherf*ckers are so concerned with China stealing information or how the government is spying on everything but no one talks about the fake history and nationalistic bullsh*t our kids are being taught in school. I've seen a textbook refer to slavery as an agricultural exchange. The process of brutalizing, abducting, and enslaving and entire people, for hundreds of years, is being taught, in real time, as an "Agricultural exchange." I used to think the Trail of Tears took place in Cambodia or some sh*t, during Pol Pot's reign. Imagine my surprise when i found out it wasn't. Imagine my disgust when i found out that sh*t took place here. Imagine my anger when it that Trail was effectively a US holocaust against Native Americans. Imagine my rage when I found out what what happened to the real Pocahontas, or what happened after that first Thanksgiving or how much Manhattan island “sold” for? Imagine my shock when I asked my fifth grade teacher about this sh*t, and he had no idea what The Trail of Tears even was. Imagine my complete lack of surprise when i didn't see a lick of that horrifying sh*t in any US history book, ever during my career in the US public school system. How did i find out? My mom mentioned the Trail and i did my own research. I stepped outside of the Fed sanctioned curriculum given to me by the guv'ment. I learned so much, so quickly, growing up and it made me curious what else was bullsh*t that I was being taught a fact. It's like when you find out Santa Claus and the Easter Bunny aren't real, but you're old enough to understand that these aren't fun, little, white lies or whatever. They're falsehoods of ill-intent, pushed in an effort to create an undue pride in a country that has done wrong by it's people for centuries. Imagine what would happen if an entire generation of kids, sidestepped that integral aspect of this finely tuned pipeline of control, becoming free-thinkers? What would happen if these kids asked their questions instead of regurgitated those sanitized facts? What would happen if an entire generation of kids weren't disillusioned with learning and took to all forms of education, not just the sh*t the Feds want you to know, how they want you yo know it? What would happen is this generation had the same understanding I had when I was young? What would happen if these youngsters loved this country enough to challenge the deception, to seek out proper change and take responsible for those horrors our parents slighted, rather than blindly perpetuate them?

Knowledge is power and curiosity is strength. If you stifle that early on, with mundane tests, hours of unnecessary homework with no connection to reality, a grade based system built upon fact retention that immediately disqualifies children with ADHD or dyslexia from getting "good marks", all of which is facilitated by overcrowding classes and under-funded schools, themselves, you raise a generation of children who hate learning. Their curiosity is stifled and that lack of knowledge leaves them vulnerable. When you don't know anything, shame fills that void. Aggressive ignorance fills that void. It's easy to become a bigot when you don't know sh*t about anything and you internalize all of that inadequacy. It's easy to become a nationalist when you don't know the other side, the truly awful, of this country. It's easy to scream antisemitism if you do not understand the history of the Semite people. It's easy to scream conspiracy when you do not understand the roots of this country. If you lack knowledge, all you can do is come from a place of ignorance and we're seeing so much of that across this entire f*cking country right now. There is an acute wave of anti-intellectualism because it was pushed for so long by the people on high, as a means to corral and control the masses. Manipulating stupid people is easy. They don't ask questions. They just follow the lead. Why do you think public schools, from which the majority of working class people derive, are so awful but private ones, from which entitled executives generally spring, are so great? Why do you think these people “in charge” fight so hard against subsided education and daycare with bad-faith, superficial, easy-to-understand arguments? Dumb people don't understand nuance. They can't see the overall, just what's immediately in front of them. Some of that is selfishness, sure, but the majority is abject ignorance. They don't know an that proposed system lines up too much with what they've been taught is evil for so long. Why do you think those on high pushed that wave so hard, in the first place, for so long? People are literally willing to kill themselves, and each other, to run right back to their place in the capitalist machine that doesn't even give you time enough to be with your newborn child. That's why. And it starts in Kindergarten, where they force your five-year-old to pledge allegiance to the flag.

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smokeybrand · 4 years ago

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Allegiance

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robertbassweb · 5 years ago

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Law of Attraction How To Manifest Your Dream Life 2020 Ultimate Guide

https://ift.tt/3bNntyy

Law of Attraction How to

Date: 2020-02-18 21:07:47

When you hear a person discuss their success with the Law of Attraction (LoA) or The Secret, you have actually most likely saw an enthusiastic, fired up person describe what appears like difficult magic.

Law of Attraction followers will certainly inform you that their wildest dreams quickly become a reality, as well as positive reasoning makes it happen.

However exactly how does it function? And also why is it so mystical?

Below is a considerable Law of Attraction guide written for the skeptics available that watch out for what seems also good to be true.

In this overview we’ll:

Program you the machinations of this apparently wonderful system.

Answer all your questions regarding Regulation of Tourist attraction and reveal you exactly how well it truly works.

Inform you all concerning the possible success as well as gains through this system including love, money as well as health and wellness.

Walk you through every action of the Law of Attraction, with in-depth daily workouts as well as guidelines to guarantee your success.

So, sit back, relax as well as get all set to discover all regarding the secrets as well as magic behind the LoA.

What you will learn with this overview:

What is the Regulation of Tourist attraction?

Just how and also why does the Lawof Attraction work?

Law Of Attraction Instances– Top 3 Scientific Experiments

Exactly how To Utilize The Law Of Attraction (As Well As What For)?

4 Actions To Deal With The Law Of Attraction

8 Workouts That Aid You Attract What You Wish

Frequently Asked Questions Regarding The Law of Attraction

What Is The Law of attraction?

In an interview with Larry King, Oprah Winfrey clarified the success that the Regulations of Attraction brought into her life.

Actually, Oprah credit history ratings her understanding of it with much of her success in life. And she ‘s not the only notoriously successful person to make use of the system either.

Will Smith, Jim Carrey, as well as additionally Arnold Schwarzenegger, to call a couple of, have in fact all practiced collaborating with the Law of Attraction along with discovered great success as an outcome of it.

So, what ‘s the meaning of the Regulation of Destination anyway?

Believe it or otherwise, the Law of Visitor destination isn ‘ t a challenging magic routine that asks for initiation into an old, enigma school or secret order.

Really, the Law of Attraction is a straightforward and additionally constant international concept..

What are the 7 Laws of Attraction?

There are 7 laws of attraction. Use them well to achieve whatever you want. These include:

Unwavering Wish

Concept and also Creative imagination

Affirmation

Focus with Self-confidence

Profound Idea

Gratefulness

Indication

Think about the Law of attraction as gravity.

Toss a cent from your roof covering, it pertained to the ground. Try to start your couch, you ‘ll strike the ground.

Gravity is an imperishable policy of our globe. As well as recognizing the regulations of gravity allows you to anticipate what will certainly occur.

The Law of Attraction operates the similar methods.

Factors within our cosmos usually tend to transfer the instructions of various numerous other like aspects. We ‘re using words “factors ” right below, as a result of the truth that this guidelines includes thoughts, feelings, individuals, things in addition to furthermore whatever else in our worlds.

It ‘s a global concept, so it places on all elements.Like brings in like.

Like migrates toward like.

Thinking it holds true or not true doesn’t transform anything. It’s an easy universal concept. Nevertheless, the far better you comprehend it, the extra you can begin predicting and also expecting what happens to you, for you. Your awareness of the Law of Attraction can change your life.

How do you materialize what you desire?

There is a simple formula. First of all, you need to determine what you truly want (or don’t desire).

Now you simply require to ask deep space!

Well, just how do I do that? Easy.

You belong of that universe. Right here are the steps you ought to take:

Strive. Depend on in your work. Obtain the aid and acknowledge it.

Your energised vibrations are like radio signals. You need to tune your signal to a resonance deserving of getting it (read: stay favorable as well as thankful).

How And Why Does The Law Of Attraction Work?

Similarly as the “why ” of the legislation of gravity is made complex as well as likewise challenging to understand (unless you are an academic physicist) the “why ” of the Legislation of Tourist attraction is furthermore rather made facility.

In fact, gravity remains in fact still a bit of a secret to researchers. We recognize that gravity quits us and additionally every little point else in the globe from floating away, yet the particular “why ” is an elaborate issue.

The Law of Attraction is comparable. Similar to all the policies of our world, we comprehend that these laws do feature, although that we do not necessarily understand exactly how to define them.Understanding as well as additionally presuming that you can do something will certainly encourage you to do it.

It resembles old great ” bogus it till you make it. “.

So, specifically just how does the Regulation of Destination task in this context?

If you assume favorable, you will certainly acquire positive end outcome, in addition to the other means around. It ‘s primarily the determined of ” you are what you assume. “.

Your relationship with the Universe

To really recognize the Law of Attraction, listen to your perception of your connection with deep space. In other words, it is essential to check out how you really feel regarding the means the universe interacts with you.

Do you believe you can influence your surroundings so points take place for you? Or do you assume points strike you?In psychology, this perspective is called, “Internal vs. External Locus of Control.”

Some individuals believe that they are a thing of every little thing that has actually happened to them. This is called an exterior locus of control, because these individuals believe they are not in control of their lives. The purpose of treatment is for customers to identify that they actually have an interior locus of control.

The Law of Attraction functions similarly.

The truth is, your thoughts and also feelings do have an impact on the occasions that happen around you. A shift in your viewpoint and also understanding of the truth about your relationship to the cosmos can begin to bring in better things into your life.

It’s not magic, it’s science

At this moment, you may still stay unconvinced that this principle– like draws in like– is a scientific one. It may still seem intertwined in magic and also, for that reason, unreal.

Perhaps it’s since we’re speaking about abstract ideas like ideas as well as feelings.

With gravity, an apple vomitted right into the air falls onto the ground. You may not understand it, however you can noticeably and also immediately experience the impacts.

It’s challenging to envision that ideas as well as sensations can have an effect on the globe around us. Thankfully, developments in technology as well as science allow us to noticeably and also quickly experience the results of our ideas.

Similar to watching an apple fail the air, there are experiments that demonstrate the prompt impacts of thoughts and also feelings.

Believe it or otherwise, there are volumes of clinical proof to verify that our ideas alone have prompt and concrete impacts on ourselves and the setting around us. We’ll briefly inform you regarding the outcomes of some significant research studies.

Law Of Attraction Examples – Top 3 Scientific Experiments

1. The Summer of ’93 D.C. Meditation Experiment

A team of 4,000 individuals offered to contemplate peace as well as love to reduce the amount of criminal activity in the high-crime Washington, DC location. A team of scientists and scientists approached the job without bias and tested for each variable imaginable.

The outcomes were clear: during the month of meditation, criminal activity dropped by 25%, definitively and also scientifically verifying that the favorable ideas of a team of individuals can influence and alter the actions of ill-intentioned individuals.

2. Thinking You’re Younger Physically Makes You Younger

In 1979, a research study was conducted on 70-80 years of age men to see the distinction in between keeping in mind young people fondly and in fact experiencing youth.

One group chatted as well as recollected concerning their more youthful days while the various other group really claimed to be young, bordering themselves with TV programs, songs and tasks of their young people.

At the end of the experiment, those that envisioned they were literally younger showed signs of de-aging. High blood pressure was reduced, arthritis was diminished, and also even eyesight and also hearing in this control team boosted.

By simply picturing themselves younger, some physical aging was in fact reversed. Their ideas made this take place.

3. The Water Experiments

One of the most popular experiment that confirms the power of thought was brought out by Dr. Masaru Emoto. He photographed frozen water crystals after ideas of love and also tranquility or hate as well as anxiety were projected onto them. Often the purposes were talked out loud, while various other times the intentions were just thought.

The outcomes were always the very same. Messages of hope, tranquility, love, pleasure and so forth led to attractive, balanced crystals, while messages of concern, hate, rage, unhappiness and so on led to disjointed as well as damaged crystals. His experiments showed that our objectives can literally change the globe around us.

How To Utilize The Law of Attraction (And What For)?

Currently that you comprehend what the Law of Tourist attraction actually is and exactly how it works, let’s discuss the methods you can use it to boost your life.

The Law of Destination is an universal principle that is already operating in your life. Begin deliberately considering what you wish to bring in into your life– such as money, love and also relationships, health and spirituality– to make the Law of Attraction benefit you.

1. Draw in cash

Financial wealth is the number one factor people come to be interested in the Law of Attraction. It’s no marvel. Functioning tirelessly for little incomes is stressful and also when life starts throwing unexpected expenditures your way, financial obligation can seem inevitable.

The good news is that Law of Attraction money is easy to come by.As soon as you learn the strategies, you’ll start to see adjustments actually rapidly. Lots of people report unforeseen checks, apparently arbitrary task possibilities as well as also essentially locating money as some of the very first results when dealing with the Law of Attraction.

2. Manifest love as well as partnerships

The 2nd most preferred reason people inquire concerning the Law of Attraction is to locate true love. Finding a lifetime companion to meet a suitable, loving partnership can appear like an evasive as well as aggravating video game that you can’t win.

Fortunately, the Law of Attraction is a terrific tool for locating love. Because the Law of Attraction suggests working on yourself and also your needs, it inherently makes you a much more eye-catching individual with a clear vision of what you want as well as require in your life.

3. Enhance your health

Most people do not think about using the Law of Attraction to bring much better wellness right into their lives, yet as you noticed in the outcomes of the aging experiment, it’s really a great tool for that purpose. Due to the fact that the Law of Attraction collaborates with ideas as well as ideas influence our physical truth, you may be bring in poor health and wellness right into your life today without also recognizing it.

Finding out about the Law of Attraction assists you see that your ideas are having a direct impact on your whole world– consisting of the vessel you’re traveling in. A great perspective goes a long way to boosting your health, and also the Law of Attraction can assist you take that also further.

4. Spiritual awakening

By its very nature, the Law of Attraction links you with higher, spiritual airplanes of existence. When you begin exercising the techniques, you begin to see past the mundane, regular world. A brand-new, brighter world opens to you that is overflowing with possibility.

Many people locate a spiritual awakening in those possibilities. Getting in touch with the rhythms of the universe and also opening to brand-new potentials awakens the spiritual force inside you that is attached to whatever around you. The Law of Attraction demonstrates that you are linked to everything and also everything is connected to you.

5. Have even more enjoyable

The results of using the Law of Attraction methods are only restricted by your creativity (as well as by the legislations of physics, you’re not mosting likely to manifest bird-like flying anytime soon).

There are endless things you can attract in your life. From useful things– like “great auto parking karma” that can ensure you an excellent car parking place, to “phones call to journey” that open you up to arbitrary invites to check out the globe– you can use the concepts behind the Law of Attraction whatsoever you please.

Steps To Work With The Law Of Attraction

Now, you comprehend what the Law of Attraction is as well as exactly how it can operate in your life, so currently it’s time to begin exercising the techniques. In this section, you’re mosting likely to learn the 4-step procedure to change your desires from a plain need to real truth.

As we walk through each step, we’ll describe its significance and just how to ensure you’re doing it right. Together we’ll dive deeply into the procedure to understand the advantages of each step.

Prior to you start:

The opportunities for destination with the Law of Attraction are only limited by your imagination. Beginning attentively. It is essential to take time to think about the procedure: where your life is now and where you desire it to be.

The foundation of the Law of Attraction is to think that it really works. Experiment with the strategies on small things initially. To obtain a feel for how the law can operate in your life, pick something minor that seems possible. If you have your uncertainties, test it out with something simple– this is your very first step to understand the Law of Attraction!

Small things can include car parking spots, arbitrarily discovering $10, or hearing from an old close friend. These are great to start out with because they’re simple to believe in. When the outcome takes place, it will reaffirm your belief in the Law of Attraction and also you can proceed to something larger.

Allow’s go through the 4-step procedure to change your desires from a simple need to actual truth.

Step 1: Make your decision

Choosing what you desire is the initial and also most critical action in the Law of Attraction. You require a really clear vision of your need. Whether you want to attract something minor, or you’re trying to find a substantial overhaul of your life, be clear about what you truly desire.

When you visualize this brand-new “point” in your life, imagine it totally with each of your five senses. Hang around in quiet meditation imaging your life after you’ve attracted this new thing. Whether it’s as basic as discovering $10 or as profound as running across your one, true love on the street, feel this new point with every part of your being.

Imagine what this new point looks like, scents like, seems like, feels like as well as preferences like if it matters.

Exactly how do you really feel as soon as this brand-new point remains in your life?

Where do you feel it in your body?

Does it make your toes prickle or make your heart flutter?

Does your pulse race or do you really feel a wave of calm?

Make it actual in your mind. Do not simply concentrate on obtaining this new point, consider your life after it too. Think of just how it will certainly transform your globe.

Step 1 is essential because it prepares your mind and body to get whatever you’re asking for. Our minds don’t know the distinction between fact and also imagination.

When you engage in complete, sensory creative imagination, your brain fires up your body to progress. Muscle mass, blood circulation, heart, lungs and every part of your body get ready to participate in whatever you’re envisioning.

Participating in this creative imagination workout, you straighten on your own with your needs. Open to the possibilities and prepare your body to obtain whatever it is you are attempting to bring in. It may appear simple, yet this initial step is what paves the way to dealing with the powers of the Law of Attraction.

Action 2: Practice genuine love

Put simply, if you do not think you deserve what you’re seeking, you’re not going to get it. Those deep, subconscious anxieties and uncertainties send messages loud as well as clear also. If part of you feels as though you do not deserve what you’re looking for, then that part of you is competing with your desire.

Consider it as a radio signal. As you check via the radio, in-between stations fight for a signal. Lots of people are rather accustomed to this experience. Both terminals complete as well as occasionally you’ll listen to one track and afterwards parts of a various tune begin to edge in.

You’ll see that neither terminal comes in perfectly crisp and also clear. In the same manner, when you experience uncertainty or anxiety, those thoughts and also feelings disrupt and also take on your desires.

It’s difficult to free yourself totally from question, fear or sensation as though you don’t should have something. And your instinct may try to deal with those feelings utilizing adverse ideas like, “Do not hesitate” or perhaps direct conflicts like, “You deserve this.”

However such approaches are inadequate and also just don’t work because they reinforce unfavorable ideas as well as sensations.

Step 2 is essential because it brings recognition of our ideas and also sensations. The only reliable technique for combating concerns and also uncertainties is to become aware of them, acknowledge them and also approach them with love and compassion.

You experience those sensations for a deep-rooted reason. Something a person told you, or the outcome of something you did, made you really feel not worthy. That hurts, so, obviously, you really feel worried or uncertain.

This step is essential because those completing signals can be rather solid. However you can deteriorate the signal or transform the instructions of those ideas similar to this:

Approach those feelings with the love as well as compassion that you would really feel towards a lonely, child or a hurt animal. When you enjoy yourself, you open the possibility to get your greatest desires, as well as you start to just desire the things that are best for you.

Action 3: Open to the possibilities

Addressing your anxieties as wellas uncertainties is important. But after a brief recommendation, replace those concerns and uncertainties with appreciation as well as gratefulness. These new, favorable feelings alter your point of view and also expectations, opening up to the possibility that even more great points get on your perspective.

Perhaps you don’t see just how the Law of Attraction has helped you in the past. You can wish as well as dream as well as mean all day, but eventually, you have actually got to go back.

So, allow’s conduct a contrast.

First, think about the negative points in your life now. Can you see links to your concerns, questions as well as old patterns that led those things right into your life?

Focus on recognizing your part in this overall process, rather than really feeling guilty or embarrassed. Identifying exactly how your worries have materialized in your life does not indicate that the poor points in your life are your fault.

It simply indicates that the Law of Attraction has reacted to the signal you sent. Simply recognize that the system functions and your brand-new awareness will guide you. No requirement to embarassment yourself or perhaps feel responsible.

Next, think of all the excellent points in your life. Contemplate how your hopes, desires, and also aspiration drew in those good ideas to you. Enhance in your mind how, when you believe something can occur, it does.

Once more, as opposed to experiencing pride or sensation arrogant, this has to do with understanding and seeing how the Law of Attraction is currently a part of your life. It’s constantly existed, today you understand it.

Action 3 is important because of connections, understanding, as well as thankfulness. Cataloging every little thing in your life as well as mapping it back to a thought or feeling is taxing and not valuable. Instead, make links to where you are now as well as the state of your mind that led you there.

Once you see that the Law of Attraction jobs without you recognizing, it will reinforce your understanding that this is just a doctrine. Work with your understanding of the regulation and also understand exactly how it works. After that you can deal with the regulation as well as straighten yourself with it.

Ultimately, share appreciation.

Feel thankful as well as satisfied for just how this legislation has actually already worked so well for you. Make a checklist of all the wonderful points in your life as well as reveal your gratitude for those points. Revealing appreciation is the vital to setting yourself up for more and also better things.

Step 4: Experience the reality of your wishes

Currently, it’s time to live the fact of your desires. You’ve imagined what you want, eliminated your questions as well as concerns and also understood just how the law has already worked for you in the past. You exercised this sort of imagination workout symphonious 1, but now it’s time to endure that imagination.

This is a little an acting workout, so release your restraints to make this workout really effective. Instead of simply imagining the fact in your mind, live it as long as possible. This might really feel foolish or weird to you, but in a moment, we will certainly describe why it’s so essential.

If you’re exercising these methods with something straightforward, it’s time to do something about it and also expect your results.

If you’re making use of the system to locate terrific car park, get in your auto and also drive to that vehicle parking place with the complete intention and expectation of locating it clear for you. Introduce it aloud. “That car parking place is clear for me. I am auto parking in the place that is open for me.” Again, we are fully conscious that this appears really ridiculous, but it’s an important step.

If you’re exercising the technique on something bigger, this exercise may be difficult, but utilize your creative imagination. As an example, if you’re trying to lose weight, go out and also acquire an outfit that fits the dimension you’re going for.

If you want a brand-new automobile, most likely to a dealership and look around. Or, if you’re going for something as big as full economic flexibility, start intending what you’re going to finish with all that leisure time as well as cash.

The important action is to take action and also act as if you currently have what you’re trying to find. It doesn’t need to be elegant.

Step 4 is very important for 2 factors. The very first is that it straightens you with your needs. The entire principle behind the Law of Attraction is that like brings in like.

When you act as if you’ve currently gotten what you desire, you are sending a substantial, loud and also clear message to deep space that you’re serious. Activities speak louder than words, right?

Also, this action is important since it permits you to truly feel the gratification of what it resembles when you have actually attracted your wish.

It strengthens your belief and also enhances the visualization you dealt with in the first step. Delve into this final step with pleasure and also interest!

Why determination is the essential to the Law of Attraction

So, after you’ve finished the 4 steps, you’ll most likely ask, “Now what?”

The last piece to the Law of Attraction puzzle is persistence.

There’s no formula for how long things require to manifest into your life. We each have our own specific hurdles to get rid of, as well as it will take some time to see the outcomes of this system.

Some individuals start to see points occur right away, while others take a little even more time. Yet the key here is persistence and also determination.

As soon as question or fear begin to slip back in, return to Tip 2 as well as address it. If you have lost touch with your clear purpose, revert to Step 1. If your belief in the Law of Attraction delays, return to Tip 3. As well as if all else falls short, repeat Step 4 everyday until it becomes a reality!

Continue to reveal gratitude and also recognition everyday. Believe favorably and also remember all the links you made that prove the Law of Attraction is genuine for you.

Require time on a daily basis to examine the visualization exercises as well as prep your body and mind to obtain this unbelievable gift.

The Law of Attraction is universal as well as it’s going to work with or without your purpose. If you maintain losing, address those questions as well as fears, due to the fact that they’re most likely talking with you a lot louder than your needs.

We’ve stated it in the past, but it’s worth duplicating: the Law of Attraction is an universal law that’s going to collaborate with or without your approval. Your understanding of it as well as understanding of how it can work in your life, will draw in more of the things that you prefer.

However, it’s hard to obtain made use of to using the right frame of mind and sending out the right signals.

Whether you’re uncertain how to get a really clear vision of what you want or you’re having a hard time to release the fears as well as questions that seem to talk louder than you, we’ve created a listing of exercises to assist you.

Exercises That Help You Attract What You Desire

Practice any and all of the workouts you want to. Try every workout a minimum of when. There are no set rules, so do not hesitate to fine-tune these exercises as well as make them your very own.

These are help to aid you get over any type of difficulties you may face while attempting to work with the Law of Attraction.

1. Vision boards

Vision boards have actually ended up being an actually prominent workout for finding out exactly what you desire in your life. In their simplest kind, these boards have pictures as well as words that reverberate with what you want to attract your means.

There are two excellent arise from making vision boards. First, the act of spending time discovering photos and words and attaching them to a board is an individual dedication to your wishes. It aids you clarify what you truly want, imagine it and also put power towards making it genuine.

Second, the images work as a fantastic pointer of your wishes. Each day, you can take a look at the board as well as advise on your own of what you’re trying to attract.

Developing a vision board is easy. Experience magazines or search the web to discover images that represent what you intend to bring in. And it does not matter if the photos are metaphorical or literal. The essential point is that the images speak with you and connect with your desires. Attach the images to a board and location it in a famous area where you will check out it every day.

Sensory visualization

2. Sensory visualization

Some individuals are blessed with a vibrant creative imagination, that makes Action 1 actually simple. For others that have a tough time actually noticing and also feeling their needs, this workout is for you.

If you have difficulty picturing your desires, start tiny and function your way up. Close your eyes and also picture a piece of fruit. For one reason or another, an orange works best, however if you dislike oranges, absolutely select something else. For the functions of this instance, we’ll visualize an orange. Follow this simple workout:

Close your eyes and see the fruit in your mind’s eye. Picture it as plainly as you can. See the incomplete, round form; the bright, orange shade; as well as the lumpy, waxy appearance.

Envision holding the orange. Just how does it really feel in your hands? See on your own analyzing it– rubbing it, bouncing it backwards and forwards in your hand. Feel its weight. Is it chilly or space temperature level?

Scent the orange. Utilize your memory to involve your feeling of odor and also see if you can smell the orange. Can you scent that acquainted scent? Inhale deeply and take in the odor.

Gently touch the orange on a surface area near you. What does it seem like? Flick it with your thumb and also tip finger. Can you hear it? Maintain attempting up until you hear it clearly.

Peel the orange. Hear the noise of the peel ripping from the flesh. See the white skin on the back of the peel. See the glossy, damp pulp beginning to arise. Smell the sweet, citrus scent getting much stronger.

Take a bite. Feel the texture of the orange in your mouth. Feel the juice and the cold flesh on your tongue. Taste the pleasant as well as satisfying taste.

Try this workout with anything, and once you’ve understood it, Tip 1 of the Law of Attraction methods ends up being a lot easier. Boost visualization by taping your voice checking out the workout out loud and afterwards playing it back with your eyes shut as well as concentrating on the methods.

3. Gratefulness list

We discussed the value of appreciation symphonious 3, however we’re going to dive a little deeper here. Appreciation establishes you up for success since it puts you in the appropriate frame of mind to get it.

Expect that deep space is more likely to offer you things if you’re already thankful for what it has offered to you. Offering an asked-for birthday celebration present to somebody and also barely getting a thank you, you ‘d likely avoid giving a 2nd gift. But on the other hand, you would certainly obtain thrilled concerning giving a repeat present to somebody who enthusiastically revealed their appreciation for your gift. Think of deep space in the same way.

Make a gratefulness list to aid with sourcing and also expressing gratitude. Right here are a couple means to do this:

Make a significant list of all the important things you’re happy for. Contribute to the checklist whenever you consider something else. Make a list every night (or every morning) of some points you value in your life today. Visualize awakening every early morning and also reviewing a listing of the terrific things in your life right now. It would most definitely put you in a much better state of mind as well as change your viewpoint to find various other things that make you pleased. Like attracts like.

4. Mindfulness

Mindfulness is the technique of self-awareness without judgement. When you are conscious, you aren’t simply familiar with what you’re feeling as well as assuming, you’re observing it without evaluating it.

Mindfulness isn’t, “My hands are unstable because I’m afraid of this conference. I should not hesitate. There’s nothing to be afraid.”

Rather, mindfulness is, “I really feel scared of exactly how others will certainly think of me in this meeting. I really feel worried of humiliating myself. My hands are trembling as a result of this fear.”

It is very important to understand that mindfulness isn’t concerning transforming anything or trying to comprehend it. This is due to the fact that the analytical and reasoning facets– our automatic reactions– are undesirable as well as in fact continue the issue.

It enhances the link in our brain between the action and the adverse feeling. To release that connection, technique it without reasoning. Let it be.

There’s a great deal of scientific research behind the impacts of mindfulness, as well as it’s well past the extent of this overview.

What you need to know is that mindfulness is proven to alleviate points like anxiety and also depression and also has an incredibly helpful effect on points like high blood pressure, the immune system, heart rate and even cancer cells.

Mindfulness is a fundamental part of the Law of Attraction since it takes self-awareness in the lack of judgement to obtain what you desire.

For real awareness of what you desire, additionally know your fears as well as the signals those concerns are sending out to the universe. To alter them, come close to these concerns and also signals with love as well as empathy.

The following exercise is for this purpose.

5. Loving generosity meditation

Approaching your fears and questions with love as well as empathy is really difficult. Adverse feelings are fairly overwhelming and also restricting, and because of this, are tough to really feel a great deal of love for.

Have perseverance with yourself as well as try out a loving kindness meditation.

Loving Kindness Reflection is a Buddhist reflection that sends compassion to on your own, others and also the whole world. And also it is a wonderful way to put your mind in a location that conveniently gives and obtains enjoys.

Merely find the sensation of empathy within yourself and also allow it radiate to others. To perform this meditation, visualize the warmth and need that mixes within you to assist a child or a hurt animal and also allow that you emit from you.

This is a Caring Compassion Meditation you can exercise to aid accomplish the sensation of compassion.

6. Be intentional

Most of us walk around carrying out everyday actions without objective. We rise, get ready for our day as well as go about our day not truly thinking about our actions. And frequently, our sidetracked ideas and also feelings drift away from the action we’re carrying out.

To truly work with the Law of Attraction, be willful with your thoughts, sensations as well as activities. Intent focuses your brain task and also uses every offered source to help you carry out an activity.

This kind of disciplined focus will certainly help you achieve faster as well as extra exact results when utilizing the Law of Attraction.

So, to exercise being willful, simply focus on a day-to-day activity as well as set your objective on each activity you perform on that job.

Initially, the method will certainly feel overwhelmingly laborious, yet just keep exercising and also view how your emphasis shifts to the reality of the moment.

As an example, do the meals tonight with intention. Before you take any kind of activity, speak your objective out loud (or in your mind, if you have actually obtained firm). Say,

” I am mosting likely to make this meal clean once more.”

” I get the dish.”

” I’m switching on the hot water.”

” I am putting soap on the sponge.”

Do not take any action without very first revealing your purpose to take that activity. Once again, it feels tiresome initially, yet soon, you’ll notice something amazing:

The basic act of cleaning a meal is actually a series of numerous actions, motions and also thoughts. As well as when your objective is focused on the activity, you’ll appreciate precisely just how much motion is included.

Generally, a person approaches such an activity on autopilot, however stepping back, you’ll see the entirety of the series of choices and also activities that make up your really, full day when you relocate with intention.

7. Attempt affirmations

Affirmations function incredibly for lots of people, who start with the Law of Attraction. And also there are plenty of Law of Attraction affirmations that you can try on your own!

Exercise Unconditional Love

8. Free your body

Fling your inhibitions right into the wind! Method freeing your body and dancing like no one’s watching.

This last workout can help you get rid of restraints that make this final step really feel actually foolish. Some people deal with feelings of humiliation and also shame, also when alone. But what’s the damage in acting out a fictional situation when no person exists to witness it? It still feels foolish, doesn’t it?

We obtain made use of to believing as well as caring about what people think about us. And also when we’re alone, we’re so conditioned to fret about our picture that we typically prevent also our singular activities.

So, method freeing your body– dancing like nobody’s watching. That’s all it takes to make this workout work. Locate a location where you can be alone and simply unleash. Music or no songs, allow your body action however it intends to. Do not believe. Simply do.

Frequently Asked Questions About The Law of Attraction

Can I truly make anything occur with the Law of Attraction?

The Law of Attraction is simply one of the legislations that control our universe. There are others, like the legislation of gravity, for instance. You can’t resist the other legislations of deep space, so don’t expect to. In that way, no, you can not make just anything occur.

You’re likewise taking on other people’s intentions– both good and also poor. So, realize that if your desire is in direct conflict with somebody else’s stronger need, deep space will certainly react accordingly.

The Law of Attraction does not give you full as well as overall control of your life, it simply states that like will draw in like. As well as you can utilize this to your advantage by being intentional with your desires, but this isn’t magic.

I attempted to show up being rich, but I ended up shedding cash. What happened?

It’s tough to say what occurred, but more than likely, you have anxieties that you aren’t attending to with compassion. Simply preferring riches does not manifest money into your life. Ensure your worries as well as uncertainties aren’t speaking louder than your needs.

Likewise, have persistence with the steps and also perseverance with your intents. After all, dealing with the Law of Attraction is continuous– it’s a constant method of patience, determination, and also objective. It is not a “as soon as and done” process.

Does the Law of Attraction mean that the negative things that occur to me are my fault? We usually associate blame and mistake to unfavorable situations. It is the burning desire in us to assign a factor for everything.

It likewise reaffirms our worries, doubts, and also instabilities. The Law of Attraction does not mean that you are only responsible for every little thing that occurs to you. It just implies that ‘like’ attracts ‘like.’.

You are more likely to attract negative situations if worry, question, and instability lead you to think poor things are bound to occur. But this doesn’t mean that negative points happen as a result of you.

It simply implies adverse things take place and your unfavorable feelings imitated a compass or magnet.

It is an oversimplification to believe that every poor thing worldwide occurs since a person had not been favorable or willful. Battles, genocides and also famines don’t take place just because somebody had not been willful with their thoughts.

Negative points will certainly constantly occur, and also we do not understand why. Frequently, we find out a whole lot from adverse points. So, think about the negative points as concealed, great trainings that ultimately make us stronger.

Magic Happens When You Clear Your Wealth Blocks.

What if the largest barrier to your desires isn’t effort, but something you, weren’t also aware of?

You could be working hard in your job, on your health, or your connections– but still not attain success regardless of your efforts. Why?

It’s because you still have Abundance Blocks– limiting ideas and also thought patterns that cause you to subconsciously pull back from success.

Wealth Blocks are incredibly destructive because you can unconsciously be undermining your very own initiatives for wealth, also when you place in the job.

It resembles taking one advance as well as two steps back.

However, you can quickly remove your Wealth Blocks in less time than it requires to end up a cup of coffee– if you understood the specific actions.

If you prepare to enter 2020 without any of these restricting beliefs, after that find out just how to eradicate these Wealth Blocks from your life in this Cost-free Masterclass with Wealth Coach, Christie Marie Sheldon, where you will certainly find out:.

More about Law of Attraction

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