#ill color these guys eventually i promise ..

[selfspinninglies]

HI I forgot to post these . Anyway sig x dinoverse au anyone [elevator hitch flavor]

[arieslost]

lando looking after his gf when shes coming down with a fever. she’s all dizzy and nauseous but he’s by her side, holding her up with his hand on her waist to guide her around the house so that her dizziness doesn’t take over and she flops onto the floor. i just think he would be such a sweetheart when his girl is ill

the way this was exactly how i felt on my birthday a couple weeks ago bc i had covid…

TW illness/dizziness!!!

he seems like the type of guy to be very attentive to his girl no matter what, but especially when she isn’t feeling well. he might panic internally, because he can’t immediately come up with a solution that will make her feel better, but he won’t let her see it.

he’ll be sitting with her on the couch, her legs resting over his lap, gently combing his fingers through her hair because she’d mumbled, “feels nice,” the words barely discernible as they passed through her pale lips. and he wants to do everything in his power to make her feel better.

“d’you want to go back to bed?” he’ll ask eventually, after watching her adjust her position on the couch a few times.

“i’m so dizzy,” she whispers, a hand coming up to press at her eyes, her forehead. “even just laying here, i’m so dizzy.”

“let me help you back to bed,” he suggests, slowly sitting up as to not jostle her too much. “i’m gonna put your legs down, okay? i’ll help you sit up and we’ll go from there.”

she lets him guide her with utmost trust, and he’ll bring up how special and loved that makes him feel another time when she’s feeling better. eventually he gets her on her feet, holding her still for a moment so she can get her bearings.

“don’t let go,” she says, voice monotone.

“never,” he promises, one hand firm on her hip and the other tightly grasped in her own. “i’ve got you.”

she doesn’t express her thanks until he has her gently laid in bed, a cool cloth resting on her forehead. he straightens up for a moment in order to figure out how to best join her without disturbing her newfound peace, and she reaches for his hand again.

“lan?”

“yeah?”

“thank you for taking care of me,” she says quietly.

his heart melts at the sight of her, some color returning to her face as she holds onto him.

“always, baby.” he replies, kissing the top of her head.

and she knows that, when he inevitably ends up in her position a few days later, she’ll say the same exact thing to him.

[acidblum]

— Яitual ¹

Rockstar!Ellie Williams x Vampire!Reader (w/c: 2.2k)

DO NOT BUY TLOU

AO3 MASTERLIST/SERIES MAS.

⚠︎ WARNINGS: +18 MINORS/MEN DNI, reader isn't mentioned as much in this part, talks of animal consumption, sisterly banter, nothing that bad. no mentions of readers skin colour or hair texture.

ⓘ A/N: AAAAHHHHH y’all i’m super excited to start this, this chapter is a bit short and there isn’t much dialogue but i promise the next one will have more of that, i can’t wait for y’all to meet our feisty reader. i’d love to know your thoughts and all that so don’t hold back <3

a cruel big ball of nothingness. is what this world is, at least to Ellie, a rebel in hindsight should’ve never rebelled. with a heart that yearned for the unknown, a love for something bigger that was never sedated.

one could look at her and think nothing of her but a wannabe rockstar, merely looking for fame, with a level of charm that was unmatched. She got away with everything she did, coming back to the hotel after gigs with girls hanging off of her arms like trophies, waking up the next day with no memory of it at all and kicking said girls whose names she didn’t bother even learning out with no remorse. getting drunk and high like no other motherfucker in New York.

Ellie grew up in Boston with the dream of becoming just like her father, he taught her how to hit the chords right and to strum a classical guitar with soul. From then and to his disdain she switched to playing an electric guitar, making him go through many sleepless nights and a lot of yelling and shouting filling up the two story—usually very calm and tranquil house.

she also ached to be like her sister, Sarah. perfect in every way, soft with no hard edges, a pure angel who does no ill whatsoever. who did try to smoke a cig with Ellie and her friends that one time “ellie please let me try..just this one time i swearrr” big brown eyes pleading her sister even though she knows who’ll be kicked out for the night if their dad finds out. “hmph..You’re about to get me in big trouble sis” she coughed from the first inhale she dared to take—meanwhile it was second nature to Ellie from the first try, and there was no way of stopping her afterwards.

painting her room black opposite to Sarah's pink colorful and very sunny one, coming home reeking of pot, body littered with hickeys, and bloodshot eyes—getting a head shake of disappointment from her big guy. driving her truck drunk out of her mind, getting arrested and spending the night in jail as a punishment from her dad. She was mature enough to know what was right and what was crossing the line— yet she loved acting as if she didn't.

When Jesse started playing the drums and Dina was already on bass, with ellie as their front man they decided to form a nu metal band together, dina came up with the name. The Lost Of Us. and it was just something silly in their minds to pass the time by. Eventually prompting them to move in together, they started doing small gigs here and there, whilst uploading their videos on YouTube. Until a record label from New York reached out to them and they sure would’ve been dumb to refuse the generous offer.

because now they are one of the most popular bands in the entire planet, doing numbers and topping charts left and right. Everyone who claimed they were satanic and doubted them heard them on the radio and it was least to say.. inescapable

𓃭

and then there's your mother who had you and three of your immortal siblings, you were the youngest, she loved you like no other which prompted utter jealousy from your siblings, in the end favoritism existed even among the undead.

your childhood was filled of conversations that could be said to be silly and downright gory—which at least kept the household a tad bit alive

“mother can i eat Riley’s bunny for dinner?”

she tuts “no that’s the eleventh rabbit now” when your sister comes in view from the other side of the spacious dining room. hitting the table after taking a seat “she is such a spoiled cunt!”

“language Riley..you will respect each other” prompting the both of you to murmur “yes mother” flipping your older sister the bird with a mischievous glint. making the rest of your siblings laugh quietly at the both of your antics.

you're the one that ought to be hidden, for your allure was out of this world. not even the underworld could deny how divine and breathtaking u are, a menace? yes you are. leaving scattered bodies all over the fort and sucking the forbidden fruit dry. but everything can be looked over when you look like that.

You were always a lover of music, back then and now. you’ve encountered many good musicians, heard and befriended the best of them. roamed the world and lived many lives under many different names and identities—for safety purposes.

rumor says that your kind cannot mingle in the sun for a millisecond which isn’t all that wrong, you’ve gone the extra mile of asking a very dear friend of yours who is a psychic to orchestrate a special ring to keep your vessel from turning into ashes.

𓃭

"hey Ells uhmm Dina says we should head to the studio to check out this guy's samples?" Jesse peeps over the door into Ellie's room who’s sitting on the bean bag in their hotel suite "yeah sure just lemme get my phone" standing up, stretching her arms, shaking off the drowsiness, she picks her phone from the table and walks behind Jesse.

"gosh i told you to go get her what took you so long" Dina stands with her hands on her waist wearing a turtleneck sweater with black jeans and black boots "what, i had to go pee first" he whispers making Dina groan before taking the suite card out and locking the door.

With Jesse driving and Dina beside him Ellie sat in the backseat. pulling out her headphones from her jeans back pocket and putting them on she puts her Spotify on shuffle to Type O Negative, before her nose picks up on the most enchanting smell she's ever smelt and she can't even pinpoint where exactly this smell is coming from " y'all smelling this?" Dina looks at her " hm smelling what? ew Jesse did u fart are u serious right now" she shakes her head while Jesse is laughing his ass off "no why the fuck do i smell this right now"

"i think you're just sleepy Ells, just nap till we get there"

and she does just that. waking up to a blood curdling scene where she's standing in front of a mirror, naked as the day she was born in some type of a chamber with an unknown woman standing behind her in a red robe. Fangs bared with red eyes that are looking into her soul she tries to look around but sees nothing other than dead bodies lying around, on the bed, inside the bathtub and all over the floor with blood and the smell of it everywhere.

she looks back at the woman with nostrils flaring, tears welling up in horror that she can't even move her pinky finger, a sharp fingernail running from her waist to her pebbled nipple and flick, she tries to breathe in at the feeling that is almost too real, but feels like there is not enough air in her lungs to do so.

voices start whispering around her figure, the woman behind her inching closer to sink her fangs into Ellie's neck.

she jumps up feeling dread and utter fear, breathing in and out "Jesus fuck Ells you scared me” Dina looks at Ellie in confusion wanting ask more “what wa-“

Before Jesse cuts her “we’re here” she feels the cold sweat with her hand "yeah I'm awake shut up” spitting the words out harsher than intended to no one in particular. trying to come back to her senses.

They all get out of the car, her nose still plagued with the rich smell of the perfume, and the eyes of that certain woman who couldn’t be real. She tries to remind herself that vampires don’t actually exist.

They head inside with their manager, before meeting with this 'guy' their manager talks about "I swear you're gonna like this one" . He said that about the last producer and he sucked ass. Dina chuckles "you already said that last time mickey, what's his name?" mickey was one hell of a manager, he wasn’t a very well known one in the industry but he ran a tight circle that opened many doors for the band. clearing his throat uncomfortably " Orpheus, i mean he looks a bit sick as fuck but you'll like his music". Dina looks at Jesse mouthing at him "a weirdo?"

“ just like you dee, guess we found your twin”

Mickey opens the door motioning for them to head in, the air shifting around to this weird cold feeling making them all shiver before the producer greets Ellie with a stretched hand “Orpheus, nice to finally meet the band”. for a second there she swore his eyes turned red, full on questioning her sanity “yea…hey man” shaking his freezing hand, showing him a half uninterested smile before heading to the couch on the corner of the dark dimly lit brown room. Taking out her phone scrolling aimlessly.

He plays the sample and all of a sudden she’s very interested in what this guy has to offer, going to stand beside him “can we keep the backup vocals?”

“yeah of course but i’ll have to get permission from the hired vocalist”

“u need permission for that??”

“yeah trust me i better then not to get this one’s, we 100% need to do so”

he heads outside the door seemingly calling someone, she shrugs before going to the drinks tray on the right corner of the room. filled with expensive drinks and liquor that dates back to the 1950s, definitely should be displayed in a museum.

“hey Jesse get your ass over here n check this out”

“what”

“look at this bottle man”

pushing the bottle close to his face, she got so close to breaking it on his nose before he read it and turned to Dina.

“this is wild i swear dee you have to see this”

she replies in an agitated tone “stop being such kids n sit the fuck down guys” murmuring incoherent words under her breath before going to check on the producer opening the door as tiny as she could eavesdropping at him

“yes ma’am o-of course…no your younger sister will hear none of this"

he instantly spots her, turning her way with his eyes looking straight into her soul with a smile that's not quite reaching his eyes. sending shivers down her body. she closes the door so slowly with pressed lips “whoops”.

Staying for a couple of hours in the studio was no feat for the trio, but staying in a dark weirdly decorated one that smells like the most expensive musk which also had them feeling jittery was something else entirely, the producer worked amazingly with them but the vibe was entirely off, especially for Ellie whom after that weird dream couldn't get her lyrics right most of the recording session.

After wrapping it up everyone bids their goodbyes before heading to the hotel to prepare for their awaited show where their makeup and costume staff is waiting for them which also gives them no time to rest.

𓃭

“Can i get a cup of hot chocolate please Suzanne”

Ellie says to their assistant from her place on the makeup chair sighing while a makeup artist is doing a subtle dark shimmery look on her, she’s already wearing her signature fit of black on black with hints of chrome and a few patches here and there on her black jacket.

“Gosh you do actually never beat the loser allegations” Dina comes in before taking her seat beside Ellie in front of the very lit mirror.

“You claim that but I saw you with your tongue down Jesse's throat in an alley last week, much for being the bisexual of the band huh?” she looks back at her with a gaping mouth “yeah i saw that” Ellie taunts and Dina cannot but flip Ellie the bird, continuing on putting her spike earrings on.

“Do you think we should tease one of the new songs?”

“Eh no?..unless you’d like to give Mickey a heart attack??”

“I mean it’ll be funny seeing his face backstage while he's losing it” Jesse sits beside Dina putting one leg on top of the other on top of the dressing table looking at her longingly while she’s putting on some mascara. Stretching his hand to put it on her waist without Ellie seeing. “Bro I can literally see you from the mirror wha-...”

She’d rather die than third wheel these two, especially with them being in a whole band and finally gaining recognition ain’t no way this is going to be another fleetwood mac experience for her. She might’ve had a bit of a crush on Dina and maybe smoked pot with her and ended up making out on their beat up sofa. Which could also mean it's a bit too late for her to not let them live it out.

Before any of the two respond with anything the screams of their fans catches Ellie’s attention before Jessica is back with the hot chocolate and their headworn microphones

“You’re out in 30 c’mon guys i need you to kill this” Mickey comes in before doing the rock on as hard as he could, seeing the disapproval of everyone including the assistants, clearing his throat he takes a seat on the chair drinking his bottle of water as if nothing happened.

taglist 🗞️:

© 2024 acidblum, All Rights Reserved.

[cecilyv]

New Fic: A comet's misfortune | 9-1-1 | Buck/Tommy

17.3k | General Audiences

[Read here on a03]

Honestly, last weekend? This fic was no where near being done, so I guess there's something to those "make me write" memes.

@liminalmemories21 has to take all the credit for the creation of this one, because she asked me one day, "But what about the rest of the Buckley family?" What about them, indeed.

Suddenly there was a family tree, a timeline and multiple drafts and eventually, a new fic, which we present to you today. This is the fic formerly known as 23&me. There is no DNA testing. There is so much back story on all of these characters (and the ones we never meet) that never made it into this fic.

If you’re sensitive about any discussion of illness (original character), be cautious with chapter four.

“Who did you say you were?” The guy looks a little taken aback. “Oh, umm, I don’t think I actually got that far. Sorry, that was stupid of me. I’m Jason.” He squints. “I think Madeline,” corrects himself, “Maddie? Is my cousin? I tried to contact her but I couldn’t find her number or email address.”

Buck knows he's giving away the game, should ask, how did you find this address, or something else but instead he raises his eyebrows, asks, “So you decided to show up on her doorstep instead?” The guy actually takes a step back at the bite in Buck’s tone. “Umm, sorry, yeah, no, I can see how that’s weird. Just,” he holds out his phone. “I found this picture of her in my mom’s attic? Her name was on the back.” Buck takes it reflexively, has to force himself to take his eyes off this guy long enough to look at the picture. It's definitely Maddie. Younger than he thinks he's ever seen her, which makes sense, because she's holding Daniel. He hands the phone back to Jason, who looks at Buck, and then at the phone, “You must be Daniel.” He looks delighted. But Buck can feel the color drain from his face, and his fingers are cold, and the door is the only thing holding him up. Stumbles when it opens and only catches his balance because Tommy’s a wall behind him. “Everything okay? Jee said there was someone you were talking to?” There’s a buzzing in Buck’s head, like after a loud explosion – he knows the guy and Tommy are talking, Tommy’s asking who he is, but it’s like they're underwater. He stands still, stuck, watches as Tommy stares down at the guy, using every inch of his frame to intimidate. The guy visibly swallows and tells Tommy, “Hi, I’m — I seem to have—“ he stops again, recoups. “I’m Maddie and Daniel’s cousin, Jason, and I’ve been trying to find them?” Buck has to laugh at that. Too dry, too brittle to be real. “I promise– Jason?” The guy nods. “I promise, Jason, that you haven’t been trying to find me.”

[nadinefromwhere]

I love you even for 800 years and more (rafayel x reader)

hi guys so uhh im back after going poof for 2 months- BUT YEAH SO REGARDING THE SELF AWARE FIC IM HALFWAY DONE JUST 2K MORE WORDS I ONLY FINISHED RAFA AND ZAYNES PART BUT I PROMISE ILL TRY POSTING THE FIC BY THE END OF THE YEAR!! word count: 631 Warning: fluff, a bit of angst?, i only proof read this once- PLUS JOIN MY UPDATES GANG💥💥 fanfic updates

ao3 wattpad

“Then what does your home look like?” the girl's eyes sparkled in curiosity, looking at the young merman before her, staring at her back. They were only children when they first met, back then it was a warm summer night as the waves calmly crashed at the shore, their very first meeting.and probably the last.

It was a distant memory, now you, a grown woman who had been working at the hunters association for 3 years now, have always remembered that single moment back then when she was a child. Every night you had dreamt about that single moment, the other person's voice….it sounds familiar but eventually as time went by, his face became nothing but a blurred one in your dreams….

“RAFAYEL COME BACK HERE” you say as you chase him down the shore, his laughing echoing into your ears, the scene unfolding before you as if it had happened before…

Before you could reach him, something flashes before your eyes, a scene that you have never seen before. It was rafayel but.. He was holding a girl. She was barely moving and she stood still like a doll, the velvet red gushing out of her chest, with him crying with no response from the girl..

What the fuck is happening..

“Cutie? Cutie are you all right?” As you snap out the first thing you see was rafayel showing a sign of concern towards you, his bluish - pink eyes staring into your gray - colored toned eyes.

“Don't worry honey i am” You say returning a smile at him, which led to him being suspicious.

The dream has been occurring non stop since last week, first was you and Rafayel in the deep sea then after you both were in the desert. A dream that you did remember was the one in the sea, you had found yourself next to a sleeping Rafayel, his breathing calm as the sounds of water surrounding you both. 

Rafayel, he couldn't stand it much longer. He was concerned for you. What was in your mind? Did something happen back at the beach? Why weren’t you sleeping properly this past few days? 

“Cutie please…tell me what happened?” He asked one day as you both were in the couch just cuddling each other on a rainy morning

“There's nothing wrong i promise-” Before you could usher another word, he stops you, his eyes filled with worry about your well being.

“You've been saying you're fine for the past few days but you're not, plus you look like you barely slept the past week plus work has been keeping you busy and you like your going to get sick soon. So please, my love, tell me what's going on. I can help you. You don’t have to always have that strong facade 24/7 you know” 

“Raf i-”

“Please?”

“....fine but i just don’t know how to explain it…..”

Rafayel was on all ears. He didn't care about the artworks he had to finish by today or either Thomas calling him to finish. All his attention was on you, suddenly tearing up from what happened

“I remember…I remember everything that happened back then..” You say letting out a sob as at one point you couldn't hold it in anymore resulting to you bursting into tears

“Everything? you remember every single thing?”

“Yes raf. Everything”

“Even when…it happened?”

“Mhhm”

“Cutie come here” he says, going to you hugging. You hug him back, your tears staining his white shirt as he whispers words of comfort.

“I love you..i'm sorry you had to go through everything…just for me” you say still sobbing 

“I would do anything just for you,” Rafayel says, kissing your forehead.

Even after 800 years of waiting, he finally found you but at what cost? 

[dimlylittorch]

Random Thoughts: Edition 6

i start classes in the morning (second semester ever as a freshman) and i’m already on the verge of an anxiety attack. i love to learn, but pressure about school has been put on me since a young age and now the whole experience is weird for me. constant anxiety, a pit in my stomach that just won’t go away. I’ve never even held hands with a guy, and i just really wish i had my CoD boys to come take care of me

no warnings, not proofread, im tired and anxious so ill edit it all when i dont feel as rough (adding my masterlist link, pretty colors and fonts, the things that the happy me does). these are all just about me, so mentions of male!reader and college-student!reader

Featuring: John Price, Simon Ghost Riley, Johnny Soap MacTavish, and Kyle Gaz Garrick

My Masterlist🌱

John Price:

john would see how anxious i am, pacing my dorm room, constantly walking in and out of the room to grab different things, but always forgetting what im trying to do.. he would grab me by the hips gently and pull me into his lap, kissing my neck and telling me how everything was going to be okay. he just needed me to get my heart rate down. i could do that for him, right? ‘be a good boy for me, love.. just breathe.’

Simon Ghost Riley:

Simon would be sitting on my bed, waiting for me to come lay in between his legs, curling up in his arms. He notices how long im taking in the shower, and he decides to check on me, knowing I didn’t lock the door. He opens it with a soft knock.. and that’s when he hears my sniffles. I try to sound normal- but a choked sob slips past my lips. ‘m’sorry si’ i whisper shakily, holding my face in my hands as i shake under the hot water, trying to calm myself down. he immediately undresses, getting in with me. he helps me wash up, holding me the whole time before grabbing a towel and wrapping me up in his arms. ‘s’okay, lovie.’

Johnny Soap MacTavish:

Johnny would be relaxing on my bed, noticing how I’d been in my kitchen area for a while. He slips off of the bed, coming to see what i was doing. He looks past the doorway and sees me with different wrappers on the counter and different cans and bottles (non alcoholic for me). I had a tendency to stress eat, and he always knew it was just me trying to cope with all of the feelings I couldn’t express. He grabs my hand gently, pulling me into his arms and rubbing my back as he kisses my forehead. ‘lad.. come be with me. we’ll get cozy and comfortable.’

Kyle Gaz Garrick:

i had been at my desk for hours, kyle already asleep on my bed. I promised him I’d join him hours ago, but now i was just gently banging my head on my desk, trying to think of some way to make myself feel better. Some way to not want everything to go away. He eventually shifts in his sleep, murmuring softly as he opens his eyes, noticing me. he groans slightly out of tiredness, holding open the blanket. ‘cmere baby’ he murmurs softly. As soon as I get in bed, tearing up, he kisses my cheeks gently, catching each tear

[daengtokki]

𝓌𝒾𝓈𝒽 𝐼 𝒸𝑜𝓊𝓁𝒹

© ᴏʟʙᴀᴘᴀɪɴᴛɪɴ��ꜱ

────────────────────✦

Kim Seungmin/noona reader

wc: 5.9k

rating: angst/mature (friends to lovers/mutual pining)

contains: drinking/drunkiness, implied mental illness, medication mention, weight mention

comments: Part two of this noona fic request. Not sure how much interest there is in this (there's more, because I love writing it and I needed some angst), but let me know if you guys like it!

songs to listen to while reading: orion sun - intro // chloe george - when does it get good

──────────────────♡──✦

Seungmin feels around in the dark, and he knows at any moment, he’s going to trip. The layout of your apartment is still foreign to him, but he likes it here, and he wants to get used to being here. It’s a welcome change from the dorm—there it's usually a mess. It smells, it tends to get loud at the worst moments, and the worst part of all is that you’re not there. Ever.

He’s a bit embarrassed of the place, even though his room is usually clean and ready for company. It’s better here, though. It’s always quiet, and warm, and it smells like vanilla and coffee, even now, in the middle of the night.

As much as he wanted to keep things between the two of you, for now, it did not work. Seungmin came home very late the night after he confessed (and you confessed), so it was easy for everyone to figure out. Still, though, he hasn’t talked much about it in the three days since. And now, somehow, he’s ended up at your apartment, and it’s well past midnight.

You fell asleep on the couch watching a movie, tucked against his side, and he shook you awake eventually.

“Time to get to bed, yeah?” He said, and he gave you a few more minutes to collect yourself before helping you up. Then he guided you into the bedroom, but he just stood there at the door for a moment, watching, waiting until you turned to him and smiled.

“Goodnight”

“You’re leaving?” You check the time on your phone. It's late.

“Yeah, I should go,” his heartbeat picks up a little as he casually looks around your room. This is his first time seeing it., and Seungmin thinks to himself how very you it is—the colors, the mix of adult and not-so-adult, pages from magazines and photobooks pinned to a corkboard next to very important looking things. He sees his face pinned there as well; a closeup of him, ripped neatly from the Noeasy photobook. No, two photos of him...three.

“Okay. You don’t have to, but…” you think, look around, look back at him, “text me when you get home, okay?”

“I will”

He clicks the hall light off as he makes his way toward the door, and with the glow of the tv gone, it’s suddenly very, very dark. The light of his phone helps, but he hits his foot on the coffee table, of course, and then he finally grabs his bag. Luckily it takes him a few extra minutes to fight into his shoes, because a text comes through just as he goes for the door.

don’t leave yet

Seungmin looks toward your bedroom door and waits. One, two, three seconds. It swings open, and you leave it there so the light pours out and illuminates him.

“Did I forget something?”

You stop in front of him and nod, “I did,” and grab the front of his shirt to pull him down. You kiss, and he kisses right back. And then you let go. “Can I ask what’s in your backpack?”

“Huh? My…oh my bag. Just my usual stuff, uhm, it’s silly. Sometimes I feel like I’ll be pulled away when I have no time to pack, so I always carry something with me.”

“So that's your overnight bag?”

“I guess. I don’t want you to get the wrong idea...if it’s the wrong idea. I wasn’t expecting something to happen, I promise.”

“Seungmin, it’s okay. I just came out to kiss you goodnight, not question your motives.” You pull him to you again and kiss. “And you’re welcome to spend the night—on the couch, or in my bed. Preferably in my bed. But wherever you’re comfortable.”

His laugh is so nervous, and he hates it, “maybe next time?”

“Of course. I’m leaving for a while tomorrow, but I’ll let you know when I get home.”

“Will you be gone long?”

“No, a week at the most”

“A week. Okay, that’s not bad. If I’m home when you get back., we can do something.”

“Right, you might not be here”

You stare at each other silently, maybe hoping to read each other’s mind. You might not see him for a while and that was hard enough when you were just friends, pining endlessly. Now you’ve touched him and kissed him, and you need more time to do those things.

“I might be, though”

“Goodnight, Minnie”

This time he kisses you himself.

─ ⋅⋅ ─

“I’m not surprised…but at the same time I’m a little surprised,” Felix scratches his head. He’s watching Seungmin cross the kitchen to fill his glass with water.

He doesn’t notice everyone staring at him until he turns toward the coffee maker. “What?”

“Surprised why?” Minho cups his chin in his hand and smiles at both of them.

“How was your date last night, kid?”

"Date?" Minho jumps and grins at Seungmin.

“We just watched a movie, it was good. She’s leaving today so I won’t see her for a while.”

“Oh no, that’s no good. So—“

“What are you surprised about?!” Minho slap his palm on the table, “Yongbok!”

“I’m getting there!”

“You’ve never been to her place before, right? What brought that on…a movie at her apartment?”

Seungmin is making his coffee, patiently, and looking at his roommate as he takes his time getting to the point. But Felix waits as he makes his way to the table with them to press on.

“You never really told us what happened the other night. You two just disappeared.”

“Oh, we went to her place, so we could be alone…”

The three of them OH in unison, because Jeongin turns the corner just in time. Minho is still confused, and nobody seems to want to elaborate for him. All four of them here at the same doesn’t happen often, so Seungmin is feeling a little crowded

“…to talk.”

“Ooh,” Jeongin smiles, “and? Did you talk last night, too?”

“Not much, no”

Their eyes grow as they wait for more, but now Seungmin is having too much fun stringing them a long.

“Please continue”

“There’s nothing else,” he shrugs, “we drank a little, watched a movie, we both dozed off for a while, I think…no,” Seungmin throws a hand up when Felix' mouth turns up into a smirk. “It was a long movie, nothing else happened.”

“Did you kiss?” Jeongin leans closer and whispers, “you kissed, yeah?”

Seungmin can’t help but smile when he asks. He can feel his face grow warm just thinking about it. Last night, and then your first kiss. That one got much heavier than he expected, and he loved every second—the touching, your tongue, your fingers running through his hair. He doesn’t want to wait a week for more, but he’s not going to chase after you now. He has to be patient, again.

“You should have spent the night"

─ ⋅⋅ ─

You sit across from each other in the cafeteria, just like you’ve done a dozen times before. It’s not busy, not even at lunchtime, but looking up at him for too long is making your heart race. It’s not that you’re afraid someone will walk by and read your mind (but if they did, they might be disgusted), it just feels different being with him in public now.

It feels like you’re both doing something a little bit wrong.

Seungmin is a young idol, and he’s sweet and kind and innocent, as far as everyone knows. You’ve already seen his unfiltered self, and it’s better than any act he’s had to put on. But he is still sweet and kind and…you assume a little innocent. You’ve never talked about your sex lives, ever.

You look up at him and lock eyes. He smiles, and you can’t help but start undressing him. Yes, you’ve touched him, finally. His thigh—he let you run your hand from his knee and up you went until you knew it was time to stop—his neck, his shoulder, his face…but there’s still so much of him to touch and see. The part of your mind that you can't keep quiet is afraid there won't be many more oppurtunities.

You have to close your eyes and relax.

“Are you okay?”

“I’m okay, just thinking. Over-thinking.”

He smiles again, and you start to wonder if he’s doing it because he’s nervous.

“About us?”

Us? That’s a much bigger word than it was a few days ago. “Yeah, I guess so.”

“Good things?”

Good things, yes. As long as you stay focused, there's nothing to think about when it comes to him except for good things. “Yeah, of course.”

“How is your lunch? Spicy enough?”

“Is my face red?”

“A little, yes”

“No spice today, so it’s you doing that.”

─ ⋅⋅ ─

What if he stays too late tonight, again? He doesn’t want to run off at the first mention of spending the night, because he wants to stay here with you. There was no expectation of it when you asked last time, he assumes, because he can sleep wherever he wants; he can do whatever he wants. And you wouldn’t pressure him anyway. He knows you better than that.

He knows nothing about your sex life, though. And almost nothing about your dating life.

Seungmin doesn’t really know much about either of those things when it comes to himself, actually. There was never much time to date, or it was low on the list. And having sex without at least dating someone doesn’t sit well with him.

But he has been on dates, and he has kissed, and touched, and he’s been touched right back. But that’s all. No sex—that blowjob didn’t count—it was awkward, and it wasn’t very good. And as hard as he tries, he can't forget his first time trying to find a clit.

“Do you want a drink?” You shake his arm until he finally seems to hear you, “drink…beer, coke, coffee?”

“Soju?”

“I have strawberry and peach”

“Strawberry somaek?”

You disappear into the fridge and dig around, and Seungmin watches carefully when you bend forward. He’s always admired your body, though it never had much to do with him liking you the way he did. But now, he feels like it’s okay to appreciate it more. You’re shorter than him, and curvier (which doesn’t take much, seeing as how Seungmin is basically a straight line). Your ass and thighs are an eyeful for him, though.

Everything looks soft. Everything is soft, because he did sneak his hand there that first night. He squeezed his fingers right above your knee, then moved up ever so slightly to get some thigh. He didn’t dare go any further, though.

The touching you did the second time was much more innocent—holding hands, fingers laced together, your head against his shoulder as you fell asleep. He looked you over carefully, but kept his hands to himself, only daring to run a thumb over your wrist as you dozed off.

“Would you like to pour, or do you trust me?”

Seungmin snaps out of it. He’s pretty sure you caught him staring. “I trust you.”

“Can you grab the glasses for me?”

He does, and he follows you back to the living room and makes himself comfortable at the coffee table. And now that he’s started, he can’t take his eyes off of you as you move.

“That’s…oh okay we have different pours,” Seungmin eyes the glass, but you pull it toward yourself. “That’s much more soju than I usually do.”

You pour his now, but only fill the glass a third of the way before topping it off with the beer.

“I thought maybe you were trying to soften me up.” His breath catches in his chest when he says it, because it sounded much more stupid than it did in his head.

“No, trying to soften myself up, actually.”

“Why? You can’t get drunk without me,” the frown he gives you is over the top and very cute. “I don’t want you to fall asleep too early.”

“I’ll be careful”

─ ⋅⋅ ─

Seungmin feels good after two glasses. It’s not much, but he hasn’t eaten recently, and he’s pretty certain his second drink was identical to yours.

You’re halfway through your third.

“These are too easy to drink.” You sit at the table with a dish of mandu and dakgangjeong. “And I’m guessing you’re hungry.”

“I usually am.” He leans forward and smells the chicken, “did you make all this.

You shake your head, “I’m not the best at cooking. I wish I had more time to practice.”

“That’s okay. Thank you for feeding me, and getting me tipsy.” He grabs a piece of chicken and pops it in his mouth. And then a dumpling. And then finishes off his third somaek.

“You can’t be tipsy yet”

“I will be if I have another”

Seungmin does have another. And the for his next drink, he switches to straight beer—but he’s drunk. He picks up his chopsticks and grabs for a dumpling, but it slips off and bounces onto the table.

Both of you just stare at for a long moment. And then Seungmin giggles as he tries again. This time it makes it to his mouth.

“Where you going?”

He’s slowly getting to his feet, and he stands for a minutes to get his head straight.

“Bathroom”

“Good idea”

“Are you joining me?”

You stop halfway onto your feet and look up at him, his hand is outstretched like he’s welcoming the company, “ah…you first.”

It’s very obvious he had a bit too much. And you did, too, but you’re working hard to keep yourself together. When you walk back out from the bathroom, Seungmin is standing up, staring at the tv, and the rest of the chicken is making its way into his mouth. He looks comfortable and satisfied—drunk, yes…but happy.

It makes you warm up even more, and you can’t remember the last time you felt so good.

“Hey”

“Hi…hello, do you feel better? Do you want the last few pieces?” He holds some out to you, but it disappears into his mouth as soon as you shake your head. “We should sober up.”

Yes, you should. You sit on the couch and curl yourself up into a ball, but when he sits next to you, your limbs develop a mind of their own. Before you can stop yourself, you slide your arms around his waist and hold yourself tight against him. Your leg drapes over his lap, and you’re practically straddling his thighs. He takes it in stride, though. Seungmin holds you right back and takes the opportunity to slide a hand across your hip, and when he squeezes, you jump.

“Sorry”

“Mm mm, no…it’s good. Feels good.”

“It does?”

“Yeah, you’re so warm”

“I think that’s the alcohol”

“Maybe…maybe, but you always—“ you stop and start to giggle, and you shove your face into his shirt to try to stifle yourself.

“Always what?”

You shake your head against him, push harder against his chest, take in his scent…feel yourself becoming even more drunk. “Nothing.”

His hand slides back up and settles on your hip, “always something good, hopefully.”

“Sorry, my head is swimming.”

“Mine too”

“I was hoping the alcohol would help, but you’re making me so nervous.”

“You’re nervous? I’m making you nervous?”

“Yeah, maybe telling you will make it go away."

“I’m also nervous. I wasn’t the last time I was here…so maybe the drinks are working against us.”

You force yourself to look up at him, and he looks down at you with big, heavy eyes. Your gaze drops and takes in every bit of him—his cheeks, his nose, his lips…his lips. He wets them and a smile pulls at his mouth, and you desperately want him to lean down closer to you. Every part of you is screaming for him, but you’re still frozen.

He’s frozen, too. The booze just made both of you stupid.

“Seungmin?” You’ve never, not even as a teenager, felt so stupidly in love with someone.

“Yeah?”

The longer you watch him, the closer he seems to get, and you see every little detail, every little spot, every little perfect blemish and pore on his skin.

“Kiss me before I explode”

His lips press into yours and his fingers squeeze so hard again. You want him to hold you tighter still, and you need to be closer. He does. Seungmin moves you until you’re on his lap, and he devours you. He’s all tongue, and it’s wet and messy, not like his previous kisses, but it’s so good tasting him, and tasting the entire night on him.

Then he stops suddenly to catch his breath, but he stays there and bites down lightly on your bottom lip. Your eyes open, and he’s right there, staring. He pulls back, looks at the space between your thighs, and there’s not much there. If you let yourself relax a little more, you’d feel his dick growing in his sweatpants.

But you can see it. You’re no longer frozen, so you shake the thought of what’s between his legs out of your head, for now. Both of you are way too fucked up for the first time. What you do need to do is kiss him again, so you take over, squeeze his shoulders and hold him steady while you lick across his parted lips. Seungmin opens up for you and he moans into the kiss—moans right down your throat.

You shake your head, “we should stop until we’re, um…I don’t wanna do this drunk.”

“I don’t either,” he keeps kissing, but slows down and softens his touch. His hands move to your waist, and then your back, where they stay.

“But don’t leave tonight”

“I won’t”

─ ⋅⋅ ─

Seungmin watches you from his side of your bed. He did fall asleep for a while, but he woke from a dream and forgot for a few moments where he was. His racing heart beat against the mattress as he looked toward you, facing away from him, shirt pulled halfway up your back. You kicked the covers off in your sleep—probably too warm from sobering up, but so deeply asleep. Still, he reaches out and runs two fingers down the skin that’s peeking out.

You move ever so slightly, and mumble something. He looks at the time: just after 4am. You’ve been asleep for about three hours, because both of you were out as soon as you hit the bed.

But Seungmin feels better. Less drunk, at least. His head aches a little, but not enough to bother him. He reaches out again, but this time he pulls at your shirt until you’re covered.

“Minnie”

“I’m up, you feel okay?”

You mumble again, and groan, but you don’t answer.

“Minnie…hmmm, don’t leave”

“Hey,” he crawls closer and runs a hand down your arm, “hey, oh you’re still asleep.”

You wake up when you feel his lips on your shoulder. “Min?”

“Are you up or talking in your sleep?”

“I’m up���oh no, what did I say?” You turn onto your back and grab his hand. “I don’t do that all the time.”

“Just my name”

“Oh”

“And you told me not to leave,” he squeezes your hand and searches for the soberness in your eyes, “I’m still here.”

“Sorry, I don’t usually speak so clearly”

The sleep-talking doesn’t phase him. In fact, the quietness of the room is a welcome change to his typical nights. The whole night, drunk as you both were, was quiet and calm. “Were you thinking about me in your sleep?”

“I must have been,” you move his hair away from his eyes, and now you’re searching for any leftover drunkenness. He seems wide awake and sober.

“It’s 4 in the morning, if you’re still tired…we can go back to sleep.” That’s not what he wants, but he also wants what you want. Seungmin figured you’d get into bed and both of you would sleep soundly until morning. But he woke up.

“No, I feel good. And you look good.”

The truth is, you are very tired. If you close your eyes right now, you have no doubt that you would fall back to sleep almost immediately. Instead you rip off the rest of the blanket and sit up.

“Where are you going?”

He watches you stand slowly, carefully, just in case. But your legs work just fine. Maybe Seungmin can change that. The thought sends a little wave a pleasure through you, and you smile when you turn to look at him, “bathroom.”

That is what you do, but you dig through the drawer under the sink as well. You didnt prepare properly, because you didn’t double check to see if you still had condoms, and if they were still good.

“Oh good,” you grab the half used pack and look closely at the date stamped on the bottom, "lucky.” But you make the mistake of looking at yourself in the mirror, and your reflection feels like it's a mile away. Your eyes blur, and the room spins for a moment.

A perfectly timed knock on the door makes you jump, and the box slips from your hand.

“Are you okay? I gotta go, too.”

“Yeah, Minnie, I’m coming,” you pick them up and palm them as you head for the door, “sorry, go ahead.”

-

Seungmin whistles as he returns and quietly shuts the door, “so are you…out?” He holds up the empty box and shakes it. “You left the drawer open.”

“Oh, no no,” you grab the condoms from your bedside table and show them to him, “we have two.”

He pulls one from your fingers and examines it for a moment, “I don’t think these will fit.”

─ ⋅⋅ ─

It’s stupid, and it’s reckless, and you know it. But it’s not going to stop you. From the moment he said the condoms—the only condoms either of you had, wouldn’t work, you tossed it back onto the table, looked up at him, “okay,” and grabbed the waistband of his sweatpants until he was right in your face.

“Okay” He sets his down, too. “Are you…” he groans when you find a good spot on his stomach, and he laughs when you graze your lips across his skin.

Every time you get back to his belly button, you tug a little more. His sweatpants start to tent, and you’re starting to feel exactly how much he wouldn’t fit into those condoms. One more tug, and you can see him—the stiff base of his cock, held still by the grip of your fingers.

He’s so hot against the fabric, and a wet spot of pre-cum starts to come through as you stroke him.

“I’m not surprised you like to tease,” he smiles down at you, but he’s blushing…everywhere. His cheeks, his ears, his neck. When he pulls his shirt over his head, he’s flushed all the way down to where your lips are.

Seungmin is just as lean under all those clothes as you imagined, and his shoulders…

“Turn around”

“Huh…turn?”

You stand and grab his hips, “yeah, turn around for me.”

He listens and peeks back at you the best he can—until your hands move from his hips, slowly upward, touching every bit of skin you can—across his shoulder blades, back down his spine.

The sigh he lets out is so content and relaxed, it actually puts you more at ease. He laughs sweetly when your lips touch him. “I like your teasing.”

Seungmin turns back to face you, and your fingers slide across him as he moves.

“Just admiring you." Yes, you are admiring him. Touching him, finally, is doing more for you than anything else possibly could. But every step forward now is taking all of your energy.

“Admiring? Me?” He cups your cheek and lifts until you’re looking at him, then pulls you close.

It’s sweet and it’s perfect, and you melt into him, but now you’re so distracted by his dick pressing against you. You push your hips in until he groans, slide your hands under his waistband.

Seungmin grabs back, and squeezes your ass. “Let me see you.” He pulls your shirt up and over your head before you can react, but you fold your arms over yourself before pressing back into him.

“Ah…I’m sorry, too fast?” His hands keep you against him. He holds so tight, you couldn’t escape even if you wanted to. “I should have let you do that.”

“No, I just—“

“I didn’t think you’d be shy”

A shiver runs through you when his hands move down your back, then back up.

“How about we…” he scoots closer to the lamp, keeping hold of you, and clicks it off. “Is that better?”

“Maybe,” you laugh, but it’s hesitant, a little edgy. “You’re too perfect, Minnie and…ah, I don’t know what's going on, I’m nothing special.”

“No, you're very special. What’s the matter?”

You relax a a little in his arms.

“I’m not perfect, not even close. You haven’t seen me after rolling out of bed at noon, or grumpy when my mouth hurts after getting these things tightened.”

You whine his name. You’re ruining the moment. Him comforting your sudden stupid thoughts and doubts—he’s probably already getting soft. “I’m sorry, I’m making a mess of everything. I'm not sure what happened.”

“Mm, no…you haven’t made a mess of anything.” Seungmin grabs your shirt from the edge of the bed and slips it back on you, “it's okay, we can get back under the covers if you’d like.”

─ ⋅⋅ ─

“Give me your hand”

Seungmin holds it up to you, then sets it in yours.

Back under the covers is where you end up, and you really do feel like a tease now. Poor Seungmin—his dick doesn’t know what’s going to happen next, but right now, you know he’s definitely not hard. You've ruined that.

“You think I’m perfect…can I think you’re perfect?” he lets go of your hand and runs his up your arm.

“No, I’m a mess. My skin, my hair is a mess. I’m getting chubby because I never watch what I eat. I don’t know why you’re here.”

“Because I want to be here. Because you brought me here and made me feel like I was yours."

“I was so high off of your words before. I thought I was dreaming when we were talking after dance practice.”

Seungmin moves closer, and now you’re sharing a pillow, and you breathe in every sigh he breathes out. His hand is moving so slowly over you, and he’s being so patient as it finds the curve of your hip and slides under the bottom of your shirt. “You’re not a mess.” He’s touching you and kneading his fingers into your side. Into your back. He works his way up and drags his fingertips up to your throat. “And they weren’t just words.”

How could you possibly deny him, looking at you like this? You shouldn’t, but your brain is telling you it will never work; it’s a waste of time. He’s going to really see you, and change his mind—he’ll find out how bad you are at this, and how emotional and unbearable you get when you do. It’s too much for him.

Still, his touch is as soft as his eyes, and he moves even closer until his leg can slide over yours.

“No, I don’t deserve you”

He isn’t sure how to reply to that, so he just stares. Maybe he’s waiting for you to crack a smile, or laugh it off, but you don’t. “Why would you say that?”

“You can do so much better than me, I promise.” You get as far as sitting yourself up, and your head pounds against your eyes. The alcohol is catching up to you and turning into a hangover already. “I shouldn’t have let it get this far, I’ve been stupid.”

“What are you saying?” Seungmin grabs your arm as you shift to get out of bed. His head is pounding now, too, because he's trying to figure out what went wrong and where he fucked up. “I can go if that’s really what you want, but give me a minute.”

You struggle with a response. You don’t want him to leave, but he should. And if he does, it might be the end of something that didn’t even begin. “A minute…for what?”

“To say something”

“Right, I’m sorry”

“I meant everything I said before, even if I didn’t say much. But you knew what I was thinking.” He lets go of your arm, because you seem to have relaxed. You’ve settled back in your spot, under the covers, back against the pillows. “I want you, and you want me…I think. And I need you around, I know that much. If I leave, will we go back to how we were before?”

There’s a long silence. You’re not sure if he wants an answer to that, but you don’t want to think too hard about it. Maybe, eventually, the memory of this can pass and you can be friends again.

“I don't want to go back to that. Not after this,” he answers himself. “So…”

Seungmin throws the covers off of himself, puts his feet on the cold floor, and then waits a few seconds before standing. It takes a moment to find his shirt, but he does and throws it on, and the entire time you watch him so intensely. But you stay quiet.

He knows you’re watching, and he takes his time, hoping you’ll stop him as he goes for the door. But you don’t.

And he anxiously waits for his phone to buzz after he grabs it from the coffee table. The empty bottles and glasses—the mess from the food scattered everywhere—Seungmin stares at it, waiting for a text that won’t come, and he decides he won’t leave yet. Instead he starts to clean.

─ ⋅⋅ ─

You’re stuck in your spot on the bed, phone now in hand, and you stare at the messages you’ve shared over the last week—to prove yourself wrong, maybe. Or just to make yourself feel worse. You couldn’t possibly feel any worse right now, though. Seungmin is still here; his scent lingers, and the feeling of his touch. But he left. You kicked him out, and deep down, you know you don’t want to subject him to whatever the future might hold. This isn’t possible, and thinking it could be was both of you just being struck dumb with lust. And maybe love.

You’ll be back tomorrow morning, right? I get my days mixed up sometimes, especially when I’m home for a while. Do you get like that? Maybe my memory is going already, haha I’ll be around if you’re free, so I hope you are. I can’t wait to see you again.

Seungmin is a good texter. He’s thoughtful and sincere, and he seems to choose his words carefully, as if he’s speaking to you face to face. That, or he just closes his eyes and types everything he feels. That wouldn’t surprise you.

I hope texting you so soon isn’t weird. No, it’s you! It’s not weird, or if it is that makes it normal for us. I hope you feel as good as I do. Good night ♥️

You pull the covers up to your chin and try to get comfortable. But you can’t take your eyes off the string of messages.

I practiced your song today! It might take a little more work to get it to sound good with my vocals. Maybe I need your input. But I’d rather surprise you!

He’s probably been working on it all week, and here you almost forgot about it. Before he sent this text, you didn’t know if he was serious, or it was just his opening line.

The sound of glasses clinking together echoes into the bedroom, and your heart pounds wildly. Then the pounding in your head starts up again, and for some reason you choose now to start crying. The tears start to brim, and you try desperately to keep them from going any further.

The sound of water running gets you out of bed fast, and you walk slowly to the bedroom door. You can see the kitchen light on through the crack, and the shadow of movement is there, too. His backpack is untouched at the end of the couch, and when you walk out to the hallway, you see his shoes next to yours. He’s washing the dishes and cleaning up the mess the two of you made.

“Seungmin”

He jumps and almost drops the glass.

“What are you doing?”

“Uh,” he sighs, “I didn’t want you to have to clean all this up in the morning. I’m sorry, I’m done.” He grabs his backpack and heads for the door. “Get some sleep before the sun comes up.”

One shoe is on, the other is halfway there as he stares at you. “Are you crying?”

You wipe at your cheek and feel what you couldn’t hold back.

Seungmin kicks his shoes off again and hesitates for a moment, but eventually, when you don’t speak, he closes the space between you. “You’re crying,” he takes your cheeks in his hands. “Please…if you won’t talk to me now, please call me tomorrow. Or text, I don’t care. Tell me you still feel the same as you do right now, and I’ll leave you alone.”

“Stop it,” you squeeze your eyes shut and feel more tears escape. Seungmin’s warm embrace, his arms holding tight around your shoulders, it makes everything else fall away.

“Stop what?”

“Being so good, and patient, and calm. You should’ve run off by now”

“Why are you so hard on yourself? You think you should be punished for…yes, I remember you saying that…for what? I know you want this.��

All you can manage is a mumble against his chest.

He relaxes his arms and grips your waist, “what did you say?”

“I do”

“Want this? Or think you should be punished?”

More silence from you, but he waits.

“I’ll leave. And I hope I hear from you tomorrow.”

He lets go, and manages to get into his shoes before you say his name. As fed up as he should be hearing his name again, he’s not. Seungmin looks at you with hopeful, tired eyes.

“Yeah?” He watches you closely, tilts his head to the side. You can see his eyes moving up and down over your body, "tell me I can stay.”

Your legs shake and your head swims. The ache behind your eyes is growing worse and worse, but looking at him makes it bearable, somehow. Even now, he’s ready to run to you as soon as you say go. But you can’t figure out why.

Seungmin is still who he is, and you’re who you are, and you don’t really belong together. Someone will find out and put a stop to it. But what if things slowly start to connect; fall into place; work out for a while? Forever? No, that doesn't sound right. Loving him before was easy, because you assumed it would always be one-sided and simple; no worries about making something work, or about working toward something. Now this is real, and it's a little bit scary looking at him and realizing how much you want him, and how big this could get.

"Say something," he sighs, and it sounds nowhere near as irritated as it should.

Your gaze drops to your feet, defeated—it moves toward his, and again, he’s taking off his shoes. Seungmin stands there and faces you.

“Okay...okay."

─ ⋅♡⋅ ─

[morus-god-of-doom]

Swap Underverse Asylum Sans

Alright, I know I'm not on here often, but hear me out.

In the swapped universe where Dream ate the apple, Ink now has Error's job, and Nightmare is trying to stop all of this with the help of a maker Error Sans, I haven't seen much in ways of the other bad guy sans getting swapped counterparts. It seems that having them stay the same, except when Swap replaces Dust or Killer.

But Swap doesn't fit well with either of them, so I think he's more like Cross in the swapped AU, but I digress, he's not who I wanna talk about.

Who I want to talk about is Asylum Sans, or Bandy for short. The little schizophrenic that is obsessed with colorful bandaids, stickers, and sometimes plushies. From what I know of him, his past is mostly a mystery but something happened to his Papyrus, causing him to take on a ghost-like form and hang about the little skellie.

He'd be a perfect parallel to Dust sans, yet being a schizophrenic wouldn't be enough to make him a bad guy.

But what if something happened that made Bandy go off the deep end? Like a certain therapist that recommends putting him on pills to solve the problem of Bandy's schizophrenic episodes. Now, this would absolutely be fine if the pills were correct for his mental illness, but that is not what happens to the little guy.

Instead, they put him on something else; magic suppressors.

From what I have seen, Bandy doesn't use magic in the ward because Mrs. Toriel and Dr. Alphys told him it would be dangerous. He understands that it wouldn't be the best of ideas for him to teleport out of the ward where he can't get the help he needs. So when they suddenly give him little, pink pills, he takes them without question since they had promised him more bandaids if he did.

But they have a negative reaction to the poor skeleton like most things would happen if you take away a person's ability to do something.

Bandy faints due to the effects and hits his head on the floor, causing another change. Of course, Dr. Alphys gives him a check-up and heals the wound, but when the schizophrenic wakes up, his ailment is worse. The new therapist waves it off, of course, giving him a white pill, Bandy's normal prescription, but when the skeleton sees him, he screams due to what he sees in the human, their true intentions.

This would be an everlasting effect as a result of the suppressors they give him with his normal treatment. Anytime Bandy sees someone enter his room for food or check-ups, he stares at them, scooting backward, so they double his prescription.

But what does Asylum see?

Well, he'd see the quote-unquote 'demons' hanging about people, or for a better way to put it, their intentions. Now, with good people like Mrs. Toriel and Dr. Alphys, the demons are small, barely considered a threat in his eyes. Yet when he sees the other doctors and patients, he sees all sorts of monsters, some fusing with their hosts, like when he shrieked upon seeing the new therapist. He saw all of the malice the man had turned them into a creature from nightmares.

Now, as we know with most bodies, they will build up a tolerance if exposed to negative factors. So over time, Bandy's body slowly adapts to resisting the suppressors, causing them to increase the dosage until it eventually stops working on him.

But Bandy still acts docile on his prescription, right?

Wouldn't you know it, one of the employees forgets to order the medicine that Bandy so desperately needs. It would take 2 days for the emergency order to come in.

No big deal, right? Bandy is always friendly to people, even before the new 'prescription', surely nothing bad will happen, right?

Well, Milo Murphy's law states that anything that can happen will happen.

On the second day, Bandy sees the bad Therapist and finally snaps. The suppressors on his magic had ceased working since his body had too much of it. It needed to be expelled.

And what better than the man who had started the torment?

It was all a blur to the skeleton, but it was bloody and brutal. The schizophrenic came to when he had cornered Dr. Alphys and Mrs. Toriel. A bloody pair of scissors in one hand, and a sharp bone in the other. He stared at the weapons before giggling, a manic grin on his face. Asylum knew a lot now, and the two women in front of him had let the therapist do whatever.

So, he finished the job before skipping off to the medicine cabinet.

He needed answers.

It would be quite a sight for the next victim, the person who delivered the medication. Seeing bloodied halls, corpses and dust everywhere.

And just like that, the deliverer would fall by Asylum's hands, and he gets the prescription he needed. So a win-win for him.

I feel like Swapped Dream and Ink would stumble upon the AU by chance and find Asylum playing with the corpse happily.

It's just a thought I had though, just a simple idea since I was bored. Just wanted it to be recorded a bit.

[cocolacola]

hellsing pokemon au !!

as promised, im going back to my usual hellsing shenanigans with some pokemon stuff. ive had this in my brain for months but have never gotten around to doing anything with it! my autistic ass has absorbed information about pokemon before i could have normal thought patterns, so hopefully my takes are at least a little satisfying. feel free to interact with ur own thoughts and suggestions!

i provided long explanations of each, but if you dont want to read all that just look at the pictures :P

long post ahead!

note: these aren't definitive teams, just me throwing around ideas. don't take this as the holy grail of headcanons or anything.

seras victoria

boltund would be her first pokemon i think, her main partner from before her work with the organization. togetic is here because idk im a togetic 4lifer and im a kinnie ? it just really made sense to me, just vibes, plus i think she really needed a flying type. may become a togekiss later, that would be cute. umbreon is pip's eevee that she evolved, and blastoise is a gift from walter. i think she needs more red pokemon to match her color palette and vampire vibes so ill probably add to this!

alucard

alucard needs a legendary of course, so darkrai. i think they would be good friends, they give the same "misunderstood tortured soul" vibes. houndoom to represent baskerville, noivern to fit the vampire/bat aesthetic.

and an important distinction:

i think girlycard should have a hisuian sneasel. they're the same critter. two ancient beings.

sir integra

im surprised with how much i struggled with this one. i feel like a fake fan. smh, anyways. sirfetch'd is perfect to me-even the unevolved farfetch'd is super fitting too-but i included the final form for this post. i wanted to stick with galar pokemon, but aegislash is literally a sword. cmon. stoutland is a recommendation from a friend that i 100% agree with. ive always associated her with the serperior line, so snivy was probably her starter. i think that'd be cute. im really open to suggestions on this one because i think she deserves more steel or normal types.

pip bernadotte

this is a big one! there were so many good options with pip... and i didnt even mean to color code it 😅 i wanted him to have an electric type to match seras (to add to the whole rivals-to-lovers aesthetic), so his main partner is raichu! it was between that or mudsdale, who i also really like (and is the only one on this team who cant be found in kalos, haha). i wanted him to have a bird (for the geese) so there's dodrio. scrafty and tauros just fit the vibe perfectly to me-they're sorta like honorable mentions. eevee is originally his but he eventually gives it to seras, who evolves it into umbreon. if pip would have kept it, i think it would have evolved into sylveon (the whole kalos thing).

walter c dornez

some interesting picks for walter. corvisquire is his main guy, his "angel of death", he's raised it from a rookidee since he was a kid. maybe it would evolve into corviknight when he becomes Dark Walter. not sure how that would work. i choose not to think about dark walter. bisharp is there for the steel typing vibes as well as the chess symbolism: it really hits right for me, with walter's arc being about how he's played as a "pawn", in a sort of way. also a nod to a very dear friend of mine who loves walter and the pawniard line respectively. :) now, why leavanny, you ask? it learns string shot, of course! also because id like to think he would raise a sewaddle in his old age to help him with things around the estate.

..aaand im out of room for images in the post! i'll make a part 2 with some bonus thoughts + the iscariot organization if i feel like it. bye for now!

[tobiasdrake]

Fucking rude. Who pissed in that guy's miso? Oh well. Let's keep looking around Bamboo Creek.

Okay, this is clearly something. Looks more like an exit than an entrance, though. Based on the differently colored stone.

Bro, I'm gonna touch this cabinet every single time I come in here. Just because you keep telling me not to. I think we should both just settle into a comfortable status quo of me touching your cabinet.

To be fair, that's a strong goal to reach for. Devolver publishes a ton of great content for consumers to enjoy. You can also find a treasure trove of fantastic material published by Annapurna Interactive, while we're at it.

There aren't many publishers out there who can be relied on with great material like the Sacred Fable of the Moon Goddess Luana but if you look hard enough, you can find some true gems.

...sorry, shilling products for advertising revenue is part of my religion. You go on, I'll just kick back and listen while enjoying this warm, heavenly loaf of Garl-ic Bread, in stores wherever Warrior Cook Wares are sold.

It's actually addiction-forming, as a matter of fact. The deferment of happiness to a hypothetical future point in time is also the main problem with marketing hype. People can become so addicted to the cycle of looking forward to things that the actual product quality ceases to matter.

This is more or less what's become of the gaming industry these days, as preorder culture and live services and DLC roadmaps all keep people hooked, buying the promise of what the product might be someday instead of an actual product that they would enjoy having right now.

It comes out. It's disappointing. But it doesn't matter, because people are addicted to the promise and eager to jump on the next thing that might possibly materialize into something good some day.

Not to speak ill of Kickstarter since... y'know, biting the hand that feeds and all that... but crowdfunding also feeds into this same phenomenon. It's just that it's easier to put faith in small projects with individual names behind them than in large companies focused on maximizing profits above all else.

We see this in Big Tech spaces as well. Ideas like cryptocurrencies and AI-driven media get shopped around, not because there is anything of value worth investing in today, but because they insist that their product is going to be revolutionary eventually. "This IS the future, this IS where society is going, so you'd better buy in now."

Future happiness is highly addictive.

No, it was insightful. This was a good talk. I enjoyed discussing these advanced concepts with you.

If this is what it gets me, then I'll be sure to keep molesting your cabinet in the future. Anyways, what were we doing? Right, Bamboo Creek, we were....

WHY PLANTS. WHY ARE THERE PLANTS. EVIL HUNGRY PLANTS.

I should have known the forest would not be kind to botanophobes. I thought Luana killed the Botanical Horror! Are there more!? This isn't even the right island for it!

Unless we're in a different timeline. Shit, that's a possibility. Hell, all these Time Shards around imply we're in an active time loop but I'm trying not to think about that because it hurts my ninja brain.

You know, the bamboo construction here is extensive. I wonder who built all this? Did we build it, and the Koopa Kingdom took over after driving us from our lands? Or did they build it, as a fortress to stage their invasions from?

Shopkeep only said this was the closest thing to a relaxing place left on the island so maybe, once upon a time, this was a nice getaway spa or something. The trolleys that move by slapping them are weirdly fun and satisfying for reasons I'm not quite sure I can put my finger on.

Those spikes might be, like, relaxation spikes. You don't know.

No, but, for real. Jumping around from bamboo branch to bamboo branch is, like, a fun day in the park for a trained ninja. If it weren't for all the demon heads blowing in on the wind, I'd be having the time of my life. I think this was a vacation resort.

Plus, y'know, it's been a while since we fought the necromancer. And there was that weird statue in Luana's fable and all that. So. I. Kinda. Was hoping.....

Actually, come to think of it, that statue might have been Quarble. Huh.

...do I get to fight Quarble? 'Cause he's my bestie, don't get me wrong, but I'd love a sparring match with him!

There are a lot of things I wouldn't fight on my day off. Like that inexplicably fast guy with the halberd who stabbed me in the junk. That was not very relaxing at all.

...

But yes, I would like to fight a boss on my day off. Boss plz.

Well, if I don't get to fight a boss then at least I still have my unchecked lust for shiny fragments of concentrated physics violations.

If there's not a boss here then there better be something really good up ahead to--

MOTHERFUCKING HIGH DIVE WHOOOOOOOO!!!!

You win this round, ambiguous Shopkeeper.

Oh hey, a tunnel. Wonder what's down there. If this is the pool then maybe there's a hot tub--

Howling like "the wind howls" or howling like a wolf? Because those will create two very different sets of expectations for what, exactly, is coming to kick my ass.

That guy on the mural is definitely pooping. Weird thing to immortalize, ancient temple builders or whatever this place is.

Very well. At least we've clarified. I will adjust my expectations straight to the bottom of a ravine. Not unlike the one I descended to get here.

[gigglegirlhappy]

(May 5th, 2022)

I’m still proud of this piece almost a year after creating it. Though my art style has since evolved and changed (ill be posting new art eventually guys i promise), I still enjoy how this piece in particular turned out. This is my last piece I drew with black outlines and more detailed cel shading, artwork after this date uses colored outlines and a more simplistic shading style (I realized after doing something this ambitious with the current, more detailed shading style I had, that I would have to change to something simpler if I wanted to have a life outside of creating art)

Jordan Joestar, her Stand, Weather Hackers, and her Sub-Stand, Kiseki Knot, all belong to me. As if the Joestar Family Tree couldn’t get any more complicated, here I go adding another member to its ranks. Jordan Joestar is the daughter of Dio Brando (because why the hell not, lets add another kid to his list of bastard children) and Leslie Jones (cringe ass self insert oc). This would, I guess, make her Giorno’s half-sister, hence why she ends up sharing Golden Wind with him. I’m planning on writing the full story, but considering my inconsistency with writing and uploads, I wouldn’t get too excited as of right now, especially considering the fact that I would like to have it mostly finished by the time I actually start releasing chapters.

Weather Hackers has the ability to make a person inexplicably forget how to do something, provided the concept is specific enough (ie. It can make a person forget how to perform a roundhouse kick or how to preheat orange chicken, but it can’t make somebody forget how to fight or eat entirely)

Kiseki Knot is Weather Hacker’s Sub-Stand. It can siphon abilities from other Stands, provided it doesn’t get caught while doing so (which is incredibly difficult, considering it takes roughly a minute to completely siphon an ability, their combined height is roughly 5’7”, and Kiseki Knot itself is very unwieldy to carry on Weather Hackers’ back)

[writer59january13]

Espousing irreverent greed

Crafted one year ago today yours truly – hopefully self plagiarism okay

worse case scenario,

I would meet ill fate re: kenway named after Assassin Creed

Black Flag's protagonist.

"Yo, I totally Kenwayed that guy."

by Bilbusbagginzies

Passive stance, but aye agreed

and did promise to pledge troth faster than greased lightning airspeed

once the missus temporarily ceased menarche regarding monthly bleed became in family way with child

thee eldest, whom one day may breed, when permanently settled

or opting out begetting offspring,

alluded daughter much more mature,

cuz parent trap truly ensnared me,

and I nearly capsized

manning figurative prairie schooner,

I captained poorly

barely surviving emotionally

analogously shipwrecked existence

I must forthrightly concede done dirt cheap dirty deed.

Unlike das papa, first born proactive

taking preventative measures

to avoid begetting offspring

with college manual, she carefully plots

being masterfully persevering enroute to notch curriculum vitae with two additional years of schooling University of Pennsylvania degreed

well self groomed for succeeding

at aforementioned Ivy League

years before taking

advanced placement courses

at Harriton High School yielding to positive advisory feedback,

she wisely did heed shipshape smarts anchors ahoy mate

passed academic challenges

with flying colors well seasoned life, yes indeed.

Wherefore sexually reckless behaviour, though I eventually wed

future mother housing zygote,

nevertheless did bungle responsibilities

to exponential powers of ten -

experienced challenges to exceed

capacity of yours truly to handle

whacking thru jungle of lady love

until...making head way verboten fruit fricasseed

essentially purring kitty I petted and proceeded to feed

pitched, hitched, ditched

libido in throes of monkish celibacy, procreating analogous to filigreed

custom made jewel of denial,

bubbling self cleaning oven,

plus compelled tug get willy freed

after being soused asthma gumweed

glommed, where male member tiptoed thru tulips playing ukulele

playing biological equivalent risque business "Russian roulette"

pregnancy eventually guaranteed.

Unlike me wily willy cocked, limp bizkit primed to hawk kitty

then future spouse did not intercede once peppy begged, connived, to forego birth control and test virility

attested, claimed, ejaculated, et cetera

arousal without prophylactics keyed

sowing wild oats courtesy yours truly didst adeptly beg, burrow, knead

testosterone totally tubular lil trouser snake did proceed letting call of wild take lead

tube steak king claim for fatherland heady after slurping boot legged mead

stifled unnatural prime mate years pent up sexual urge, thus did supercede.

Thence sore relief yours truly did need

for swearing against wearing raincoat

at seminal moment blithely releasing seed subsequent expense imposed

on fecund counterpart

with snoop doggy dogg speed

generating prickly heat inducing boner fied stampede

appetite for reproduction

struggling with common sense (particularly lacking gainful employment)

raising and supporting young ones

incurred courtesy one or more progeny needs and wants of offspring,

who sprouted like loco crazy weed,

as greater demands imposed on their mama and papa.

[byunmyeon]

Philophobia

↳ pairing: lee suho x reader

↳ synopsis: in a world where a red string connects soulmates, everyone knows who they belong with. except you, who hasn’t been able to see your string since you were a kid.

↳ warnings: language (like one word), a copious amount of angst and heartbreak

— note: there’s a serious lack of suho fics out there so I decided to write my own. lmk if you guys want me to write a second part!

There was something inexplicably eerie about being the new girl in a school that was twice the size of your old one. Not because it was an unfamiliar setting, nor was it because you were painfully shy and terrible at making friends. It wasn’t even your disparaging insecurities that had you feeling so shook. No, it was something you couldn’t put your finger on, something you couldn’t begin to name. A discomfort you could feel all the way down to your bones.

Your inordinate unease swelled into full blown panic with every step you took toward your new classroom. Somewhere in your unorganized mind, you could hear your mom’s reassuring voice. Everything will be okay. You didn’t know if her words held any truth, but you really, really, really hoped she was right. You were being stupid, honestly. There was nothing to fear, but you couldn’t shake the foreboding feeling from your stature. Despite all the undesirable emotions you felt, your breathing was normal and your heartbeat was steady.

It took you a minute to gather yourself. You could do this.

After a very ineffectual pep talk, you finally got your feet to move. Your eyes were cast down as you entered the classroom. The rowdy classroom went silent once your presence became known. You swallowed the nerves and chanced a glance at your new classmates. The reactions were a mixture of curiosity and disinterest.

When your teacher introduced you to the class, you decided to really look at your new classmates. Among the sea of unfamiliar faces, one stuck out. An unnaturally attractive face belonging to an unfamiliar boy. His stare was strange. It was full of an intensity you couldn’t comprehend. You kept staring, in spite of yourself. Fuck. Was it possible for someone to be so attractive?

The clapping of your classmates pulled you back into reality. You were quick to look elsewhere, unable to understand the sudden lurch of your heart.

Suho couldn’t take his eyes off the new girl, more specifically, the string neatly wrapped around her index finger. He watched her carefully. The shy smile she wore was annoyingly adorable, and it made a foreign warmth spread across his chest and along his entire body. The new girl didn’t spare him another glance as she took her seat next to Jugyeong.

Lim Jugyeong.

He wasn’t her soulmate and she wasn’t his, but she was the girl who had unknowingly stolen his heart. That wasn’t about to change because some stranger who he was supposedly meant to be with came into his life with no warning.

Suho looked back to the front of the classroom without looking at the new girl again.

The first time it happened, you wrote it off as fatigue. After all, you had just started middle school and trying to keep up with your new workload as well as your budding social life was exhausting. That day, the color of your string had faded a bit, but it was still visible. By the time you were on your way home it disappeared for a mere second before regaining its color. Days later, it was completely gone.

When your mom first found out you could no longer see your string, she became extremely distraught. It had affected her more than it did you, honestly. She wasted no time in taking you to see countless specialists and psychologists. Anything to keep you from becoming a freak that didn’t know who they were meant to be with. She unknowingly made you feel exactly like that.

Apparently, you were a rare case because every person you went to for help wanted to conduct a study on you and your condition. Fortunately for you, your mom didn’t want you becoming a lab rat and decided to stop seeking out help from strangers. Left with no other option, you went to one person who she believed could help you. An old friend of hers.

He wasn’t a specialist, just a regular doctor who came to the conclusion that a deep, scarring trauma had caused you to no longer see your string. You could remember the heartbreak on your mom’s face because you both knew what that trauma was.

Your mom did her best to help you. Spending more time together and countless hours of therapy did nothing for your condition. Nothing worked. You became convinced that trying to see your string again was futile.

And you were right.

As time went on, you grew used to the unease that had latched itself onto you on that first day. The feeling in your bones settled in like an unwelcome guest who refused to leave. No matter what you did, you couldn’t shake the feeling. Eventually, you gave up trying.

However, something shifted when you crossed paths with Lee Suho.

You two had been put in the same group for a science lab. His attention had been solely on Lim Jugyeong, but there were times when your eyes would meet. Those milliseconds were just that, but to you they felt like an eternity. He rarely addressed you, but when he did, you could feel the pressure weighing on your bones fade bit by bit. That familiar feeling soon shifted into a more comfortable presence that you yearned to feel forever.

It was subtle, but at some point, Suho’s emotionless face changed. The change would last for no more than a second, but it always did when he looked at you. That change had your entire stature seeping with warmth. You vaguely recognized the feeling as something akin to infatuation.

It scared you.

Of course, the possibility that he might be your soulmate crossed your mind, but you quickly dismissed that thought.

Too many times had you gotten in trouble for insisting someone was your soulmate when they really weren’t. Any special bond or feelings that grew between you and someone else couldn’t always be interpreted as the ones between soulmates. You learned that the hard way.

Besides, your soulmate would make it clear to name themselves as such even if you couldn’t see the string.

At least, you hoped they would.

Philophobia.

Before you went into high school, your mom insisted you see one last psychologist with the promise that the one she found was different. Reluctantly, you went to see this woman who diagnosed you with this absurd illness. You felt like it was made up, but your mother was adamant that you did have it.

You knew she only thought that because you had told her you no longer had any interest in finding your soulmate. Her panic was unrivaled after hearing those words come out of your mouth. You wrote off her panic because your disinterest in soulmates was only natural. How could it not when—at the time—it was all your friends could talk about? Talk about being the odd man out.

Okay, and maybe you also weren’t keen on meeting new people because of the fear that they could easily ignore the string you couldn’t see. There was also the fear that if you ever did meet someone you wanted to spend your life with, they could end up not being your soulmate and vice versa.

But those feelings would all fade with time, you were sure.

Hanging out near the back of the school where no one ever went became a regular thing for you. It was the one spot where you didn’t have to worry about your soulmate or anything related to that—a safe place. Until it wasn’t.

“You can’t just ignore the bond you have with her.”

The angry voice was one you vaguely recognized. You peeked around the corner, eyes widening when you saw Han Seojun and Lee Suho in the middle of what appeared to be an argument.

“Why are you bringing that up?” Suho’s eyes narrowed. “Do you still like Jugyeong?”

Seojun’s gaze hardened. “It’s not about that.”

It was wrong to listen on what was clearly meant to be a private conversation, but your feet wouldn’t move. You could see Suho’s anger and irritation from your hiding place, and for some reason seeing him that way made a blistering discomfort latch itself onto your chest.

“You’re being unfair to Jugyeong and Y/N.”

The mention of your name had your insides twisting into an uncomfortable knot. You didn’t understand why or how you had anything to do with the discussion, but you had a feeling the reason wasn’t anything good.

“Just because she’s my soulmate doesn’t mean I owe her anything.”

There was a sharp pain in your chest, one that grew into a searing pain as the seconds ticked by. You might’ve cried out in pain had it not been for the shock that consumed you. In a sudden instant, your vision became blurred with tears as you staggered back. His words were the worst form of torture, like a piece of barbed wire that wrapped itself around your heart.

Your fate was a cruel one, forever bound to someone who refused to acknowledge the bond between you two. Lee Suho was your soulmate, but he didn’t want to be.

It was a cruel reality to have your worst nightmare come to life.

“Is it true?”

Suho raised an eyebrow at you. His gaze didn’t soften like it once did. Now it just remained impassive, almost annoyed. The cold look he was giving you was making you regret even coming to him in the first place.

“Are you really my soulmate?”

“Why are you acting like you don’t know?” Suho’s unaffected stare unsettled you. “You’ve known since the first time we saw each other.”

But you hadn’t known. This entire time you had been driving yourself crazy thinking you were only imagining the connection between you two like you had done countless times after you first lost the sight of your string. Despite wanting to tell him that, you settled for a question.

“What about Jugyeong? Don’t you think she—?”

“Are you going to tell her?” He interrupted you.

You could literally hear your heart crack. Of course that’s all he cared about. He didn’t care whether or not you were hurt and upset, hell, he probably thought you had no interest in your soulmate. But he was wrong, so very wrong.

“Why?” He demanded. “You don’t want me as your soulmate either. You’ve been ignoring the bond, too.”

I can’t see my string! You nearly yelled. The words were clawing at your throat, eager to be released. But you found yourself unable to tell him the truth.

“My soul chose yours,” you said, close to tears. “And a soul just doesn’t forget that.”

For a moment, one that was so quick you thought you imagined it, Suho looked remorseful. Stupidly, it made you hope that he would accept you and the bond that bounded you together.

“Don’t tell her.” His voice didn’t sound like a plea, but you knew what he was asking you to do was clearly important to him. “I can’t loose her.”

And so, you agreed. Even if it meant that your own heart would be left in tatters.

[maria-akira]

good girls don't get used: michael langdon x fem! reader

—♡—

READ PART 2 HERE

summary: michael langdon, your ex, falls into a bet wherein he has to (fake) date you. if he falls in love again, he loses and doesn't get the prize.

warnings: private school au, fuckboy!michael, slight mention of sexual topics + i didnt proofread this mwahaha

this fic is inspired by the song 'good girls (don't get used)' by beach bunny.

i don't know if other private schools have bells, because mine doesn't :(

italicized bold words are direct lyrics from the song. but in this chapter, there are none since this is like an intro :)

—♡—

"Dude, shut the fuck up."

"Are you kidding? She really said that?"

"You really think that's gonna happen?"

"Who's class do you have first?"

Voices of different students flooded the white and grey hallways of the school. Different friend groups and teachers can be seen roaming the halls, getting stuff from their respective lockers as they waited for the bell to ring.

"Y/N! Do you mind if I borrow your calculator? I forgot mine at home and Math is my next class." She said while panting.

"Sure, here it is. If you lose it, I'd probably drop kick your ass." Y/N let out a small laugh and grabbed the calculator from her locker, giving it to her friend.

"Gosh, Y/N. I'll never lose it! I'll give it back during recess. Thanks again!" She flashed Y/N a smile and waved bye, before returning to her locker.

Y/N looked at herself in the mirror she had on her locker, fixing the tie that always seemed to be out of place whenever she checked. Her hair was neat, complete with a white headband that complimented the color of her school's uniform.

A few seconds later, the bell rang and everybody started rushing. Different couples were seen kissing before they parted ways for the mean time.

Cringe. Y/N thought. She shrugged it off and held her books tightly to her chest, walking to her next class.

Walking straight into the classroom, she noticed a group of guys dart their eyes to her direction as she entered. They gave her weird smirks. In return, she stared back at them while she made her way to her seat and never broke eye contact. Eventually, she noticed a familiar face among the group.

Michael, her ex.

How the fuck is he in my English class? She thought, along with a whole hundred thoughts roaming around her head. Michael stared back at her, giving her a wink.

Y/N's face gave a hint of disgust, "The fuck do you want, Langdon?" She stood up from her seat and walked over to Michael, pushing his other friends. She heard his friends coo and tease Michael for his act towards her.

Michael put up his hands in defense, "Chill, is it bad to wink at a pretty girl like you?" He said with a smug look, while he grazed his hand over her arm.

"Shut the fuck up, Langdon. Don't you ever touch me." Y/N slapped his hand away, his friends taken aback from her actions. As she walked back to her seat, the teacher entered as well.

Y/N put her face in her hands. By now, a million thoughts were in her head. It's been 2 years since Michael and her broke up, and since then, she made a promise to herself that she would never fall in love with men like him. She was so tired of all the tears and sleepless nights that Michael gave her.

She let out a sigh and lifted her head from her hands. The soft light from the windows filled her eyes after the darkness formed by her hands, causing her to rub her eyes to adjust from the light.

The rest of the hour went smoothly for Y/N, after English class was recess, her most favorite time of the day— aside from going home, of course.

She glanced at her watch, 10:28 AM.

2 more minutes, and English will be over. She thought.

She averted her gaze back on the white board full of scribbles about some writing lesson she clearly did not listen to. She looked over to her classmates and friends, Well they aren't listening either. She laughed at the thought.

As soon at the bell rang, everyone started packing up their notebooks, textbooks, and whatever they had on their table. Every student was seen rushing out of every classroom in hopes of being the first ones in line for the cafeteria.

On the way there, Y/N bumped into her friend group. "Hey Y/N! We heard about happened in English class. Michael is really in your class?" A friend of hers mentioned, "Yea, and apparently that son of a bitch winked at me, such a disgusting ass motherfucker. he should keep his fuck boy ass to himself." Y/N spat out, earning a chorus of 'oh's' from her friends.

When they arrived at the cafeteria, the line was painfully long, all of them groaned in frustration and they had no choice but to wait for the line to move. But once it did, it was faster than usual. After Y/N and her friends received their food, they left the cafeteria to eat at their usual place.

The school rooftop.

A few students know that staying in the school rooftop is permitted, which was why Y/N and her friends loved eating there.

When they arrived at the rooftop, they saw the usual people that they always encounter while staying there. The view was beautiful, there was no doubt about it. The small garden in the rooftop gave a beautiful and elegant touch.

Though there were a few chairs and tables, Y/N and her friends always preferred to eat on the floor. So, they laid the linen cloth on the ground and sat on it. Y/N was wearing the skirt uniform, thus she removed her tux and placed it on her legs to prevent her skirt from lifting.

They shared a few giggles while they ate their meals, laughing about some life experiences, or whatever they wanted to talk about.

Y/N loved this. She loved how she and her friends would have little moments like these, it was like an escape from reality.

The rest of the day went smoothly for Y/N. She didn't fall asleep in any of her classes, which in this case was a very big accomplishment for her.

As soon as she arrived home, her little brother, Aaron, rushed towards her. "Y/N!! I missed you!" He chimed, Y/N kneeled down onto his level and gave him the tightest hug. "I missed you too, Aaron!" Her mom came into the room and smiled. Y/N stood up and gave her mom a hug as well.

"How was school?" Her mom asked, Y/N placed her tux on the coat hanger by the door. "It was fine, Mom. Where's Dad?" Y/N walked over to the fridge and poured herself a glass of milk, "He'll be home soon, he still has a meeting right now." She took a sip of her milk, "Oh, okay. I'll be upstairs doing school work." The glass of milk that was once full, now empty.

She took her things upstairs and plopped herself on the bed. Out of nowhere she felt a vibrating noise from her bag, she rummaged through her bag to find her phone and once she did, a message was see on her lockscreen.

Unknown Sender has sent you a message.

She unlocked her phone and went to her messages.

Unknown Sender: hey ;)

Her eyebrows furrowed. What the fuck?

(Y/N): hi? whos this?

read 2:29 pm

Unknown Sender: oh shit you deleted my number? damn.

"Huh? I don't recall deleting anyone's number..." She went to her recently deleted contacts and it showed nothing.

(Y/N): im sorry, i haven't deleted anyone's number recently, maybe you have the wrong number?

read 2:32 pm

Unknown Sender: im pretty sure you know me, Y/N.

They know my name. And her heart started pounding.

(Y/N): and im pretty sure i dont, so just reveal yourself before i report this number

read 2:35pm

Unknown Sender: ayo chill 😬 its me michael.

"Michael fucking Langdon? You've got to be fucking me right now." She felt rage fill her, slamming her keyboard.

(Y/N): langdon what the fuck do you want? i made it very clear that i dont want you talking to me.

read 2:40 pm

Before Michael could reply, she changed his contact name to 'Motherfucker'

You have changed Unknown Sender's contact name as 'Motherfucker'

Motherfucker: damn you still mad at me after 2 years? gosh (Y/N). whats with the nickname?

(Y/N): of course im still mad, asshole. ill never forget what you fucking did.

read 2:43 pm

Motherfucker: i thought you forgave me 🥺

(Y/N): FORGIVE YOU???? god langdon you're so fucking stupid, i will never forgive you. you didnt even say sorry in the first place!

Pissed off, Y/N blocked his number. "That fucking asshole." She mumbled to herself.

—

"Hey! Y/N!" A familar voice called out from the crowd. Y/N removed one earbud and turned around to find the voice that called her.

Once she saw the shiny blonde locks from that stood out in the crowd, she immediately ran in the opposite direction in hopes of avoiding him.

It was Michael, again.

"Y/N wait!" Michael called out again, chasing her

For some reason, Michael was able to catch her. He pulled Y/N into an empty science laboratory and they were both panting.

"What the fuck do you want this time, Langdon?" Y/N was catching her breath, fanning herself with her hand.

"Okay. First off, sorry for the sudden message. I know I pissed you off and that wasn't my intention at a—"

"What was your intention then?" She cut him off.

Michael panicked.

"Uh, you know? I just wanna talk to you again. Clear the bad air between us.."

Y/N let out a laugh, "Clear the bad air?? Oh gooood Langdon, you are really so stupid! You know what? You just made it worse." She pushed him off and walked out of the room,

"Whatever it is your planning, Langdon, I'm telling to stop it. I don't wanna talk to you or even go near you."

Michael was dumbfounded. She changed so much. He thought to himself.

2 years ago, Y/N was the sweetest, most innocent girl he knew. Playing with her feelings was Michael's biggest regret, and he's starting to feel it again.

Michael was about to leave the room until he felt a buzzing from his pocket, He pulls out his phone to see who was calling him.

Duncan, one of his bestfriends.

Michael answered the call, "Hello?"

"What's the update on your little girl?"

"She still doesn't trust me."

"That's sad man."

"I know. She changed alot. "

"What do you mean by 'changed'?" Duncan emphasized,

"I can't point it out, Dunc."

"Whatever you do, don't chicken out. I promise this bet is worth it."

"Fine, I trust you."

Call Ended.

Michael ran his fingers through his hair in frustration and left the room before the bell rang.

—

It was the last subject of the day. Most students were falling asleep or on their phones.

Y/N was scribbling weird things on the back of her notebook, when suddenly the bell rang. She packed up her stuff and stood up from her seat. Before she could leave the room, she saw a familiar face again.

Michael stood by the doorway of her classroom, the strap of his bag over one shoulder while he looked for Y/N among the other students.

Y/N ignored Michael and walked past him, but he grabbed her by the arm and pulled her towards him.

"Langdon! What the fuck do you want?!" She screamed, all of the students averting their attention to her.

Michael put a finger on his lips, shushing her. "Let's go somewhere private, yea?"

"But—"

Before she could object, Michael dragged her outside towards the parking lot.

"Okay this is actually something serious—"

"CUT THE SHIT LANGDON! IM TIRED OF YOU."

"Woah‐woah! Easy now. I actually need your help, with school..."

Michael rubbed her shoulders, looking straight into her eyes. For once, Y/N believed him. His eyes were speaking the truth.

"Okay, fine. Shoot."

"I can't believe I'm saying this.."

"Don't waste my time, Langdon."

"Fine! I'm failing."

Y/N's mouth hung open. Michael was one of the top students in their batch and this was obviously a huge surprise for her.

"Oh, really? What am I gonna do about that?" She crossed her arms and cocked her head to the side.

"Can you please help me? Like, tutor me?" At this point, Michael was desperate.

"Um, no thanks. Just fuck some other girl's pussy for your grades." Y/N pushed him away, but Michael stopped her again.

"I'm serious, Y/N. I really need your help."

"Why me?"

Now that made Michael nervous.

"Because you happen to be the top of our batch right now?"

"Fine! Under one condition."

Michael was curious, "What?"

"If I do this tutor shit, we're doing it at my place. I can't tutor you in your messy ass room." Y/N said. She always remembered how messy Michael's room was when they were together. He would only clean when he was scolded by Y/N.

"That's fine by me."

"Okay then. 5pm, sharp."

She walked away, but Michael pulled her again.

"Let me go! What do you want now?" Y/N said, clearly annoyed.

"Unblock my number, silly." Michael chuckled,

"No."

"How are you supposed to know if I already arrived?"

"Theres a doorbell, dimwit. I'll be downstairs waiting for you."

"Bu—"

"Bye, Michael. I'll see you later." Y/N flashed him a small smile and continued to walk away.

Once he saw Y/N reach the bus stop, he started walking to his car, until someone tapped him on his shoulder.

"Hey Michael, whats the update? I saw you talking to her." It was Duncan. His brown hair was lightly gelled back and the first two buttons of his white dress shirt were undone.

"I'm still trying to win her back, I lied to her that I was failing so she could tutor me. That way, it'll be easier."

Duncan smirked, "That's my boy! When will this tutor thing start?"

"Later, 5pm."

"Hmm, that's good. Remember, if you fall in love again, bet's over."

"I won't."

—♡—

tags mwah: @kitwalker02 @sojournmichael @angelicmichael @deademobitch @iheartfrogs101 @tatestripedsweater @mrs-march-ahs

i hope you guys enjoyed this. i wrote this while doing schoolwork </3

[dull-bun]

Them with an S/O who gets sad really suddenly

BNHA boys s ss (once again-) with an S/O who gets sad really suddenly and out of nowhere @chaoswrites​ IM REALLY SORRY I LEFT YOU TO WRITE THIS I WAS JUST FEELING SAD :(

Warnings/TW: Maybe a lil bit of angst, mentions of depression?, crying, swearing Gender neutral

hi- This is, once again, kinda a vent since I tend to get really sad even if just a second ago I was wheezing FVERHBHJR cause ✨mental illness luv✨ GFEJFRBEJ to my purple heart anon and the anon who requested for collot, I promise I’ll work on those after this! I’m very sorry if I take too long!

💥BAKUGOU KATSUKI💥

You guys were taking a walk in the park (it was Mina’s idea)

You were being your happy self, eating (random snacc)

The rest of the group were walking alongside you both

Bakugou was being his tsundere self, secretly staring at you

you looked so cute🥺🥺

Bakugou started talking to Kirishima

Everyone was talking to at least someone, besides you

You didn’t mind, so you just smiled softly and started humming

After a while you stopped humming and suddenly felt really sad

Katsuki noticed this

You were trying not to cry

You didn’t know why you were sad :(

You were having such a good time, why were your dumb emotions getting in the way? (YOUR EMOTIONS ARENT DUMB BTW >:(() “Uh, I’m going to sit here for a bit, you guys can keep walking” You said as you sat on a cream colored bench, smiling fakely. The group (besides katsuki) kept on walking after they acknowledged what you said. Bakugou huffed and sat down next to you. “Hey idiot, what’s wrong?” He grumbled, making you look at him. You started tearing up and just shrugged, really not knowing why you were sad. “I-I don’t know..” You said softly, your voice sounding strained and quiet.

After that you both went to the dorms

You felt bad that you had ‘ruined’ the day for Katsuki :(

Katsuki just shushed you RBFHJER

You guys went into his dorm and cuddled, Bakugou rubbing circles into your back

You were crying, not sobbing but not crying quietly either

Bakugou didn’t mind you getting his shirt wet

You eventually fell asleep

Bakugou kissed your forehead but you didn’t hear it from me HJFEFRJ

💚IZUKU MIDORIYA🌿

You and Midoriya were laughing, just watching a shitty movie

You both were having a great time!

Until you weren’t :(

You suddenly felt really sad

You pulled your blanket over your head, trying not to tear up

You laughed with Izuku, trying to act happy for him (he deserves everything)

You soon didn’t have the energy to laugh

So you just buried your face into a pillow you were holding, crying silently

Izuku didn’t hear you, he had thought you had fallen asleep

He was going to ‘wake you up’ so he could ask you if you wanted a snack from the fridge or something

But then he heard you sniffling :(

Mans literally went D: You didn’t notice little babi Izuku being right in front of you, frowning. You just wanted to go to your own dorm and cry, not wanting to ruin the moment for Izu.  Izuku gently put a hand on your covered head, trying to comfort you the best he could. “H-hey.. What’s wrong?” He asked softly, slowly and gently hugging you. “I don’t k-know..” you sobbed out, gripping his shirt.

Izuku comforted you for the rest of the afternoon

He liked knowing he was making you feel comforted, so he didn’t mind not watching the movie

You both fell asleep

In the end Izuku didn’t get snacks :((

But he was happy that he made you feel better :)

And if you’re happy he’s happy

If you’re sad he’s sadder

HFREHBHJRNKFNERJ

You guys cuddled on the floor AHBHEWJBFJ

🔥SHOTO TODOROKI🧊

You and Todoroki were out shopping, just having a grand ol’ time y’know?

You and Todo had been a thing for a couple of months, almost a year

Ya’ll loved each other so much 🥺🥺

It was difficult in the beginning, Todoroki being closed off and all

But he slowly opened up to you

And that made you happy :D

But right now, you weren’t so happy

You thought about all the times he’s done things for you, like buy you something you were eyeing from a store

You felt like you didn’t do much for him :( (Spoiler: You did a lot for him too)

So you started getting sad :((

As the day dragged on, you declined his offers to get something for you, even if it was a small snack

You offered to pay for most of the things

Of course your behaviour didn’t go unnoticed by Shoto

Mans was worried :(((((

You reassured him it was nothing, you were just tired

Shoto and you soon decided to go back to the dorms

You plopped down on his bed and shoved your face into his pillow, trying to seem like you were sleeping

Shoto frowned softly and sat next to you, putting a gentle hand on your head (SHOTO JUST PUSHES YOUR HEAD ON THE PILLOW HJFREHJFEJRW JK JK-)

“Is there something you want to tell me?” he decided to ask You shook your head and shrugged, finally turning your head to face him. “I don’t know..” You said softly and wiped your teary eyes. He understood the feeling of sadness coming out of nowhere. He didn’t need you to tell him more. “It’s okay.. Come here” 

He pulled your head to his chest and laid down on the bed with you

He whispered small reassurances, running his hand up and down your back

It made you feel a little better at least :D

You thanked him softly, kissing his covered chest and saying a small ‘I love you’ then falling asleep

He smiled softly and kissed your head, muttering a small but heartfelt ‘I love you too’

I’m sorry for you know- The OOC characters :( I made this bcus I always get sad for no reason HWHJWEVRH Anyway, thanks for reading!

[wolfstar-in-color]

July Colorful Column: Remus is a Crip, and We Can Write Him Better.

There is one thing that can get me to close a fic so voraciously I don’t even make sure I’m not closing other essential tabs in the process. It doesn’t matter how much I’m loving the fic, how well written I think it is, or how desperately I want to know how it ends. Once I read this sentence, I am done.

It’s written in a variety of different ways, but it always goes something like this: “You don’t want me,” Remus said, “I am too sick/broken/poor/old/[insert chosen self-demeaning adjective here].”

You’re familiar with the trope. The trope is canonical. And if you’ve been around the wolfstar fandom for longer than a few minutes, you’ve read the trope. Maybe you love the trope! Maybe you’ve written the trope! Maybe you’re about to stop reading this column, because the trope rings true to you and you feel a little attacked!

Now, let’s get one thing out of the way right now: I am not saying the trope is wrong. I am not saying it’s bad. I am not saying we should stop writing it. We all have things we don’t like to see in our chosen fics. Maybe you can’t stand Leather Jacket Motorbike Sirius? Maybe you think Elbow Patch Remus is overdone? Or maybe your pet peeves are based in something a little deeper - maybe you think Poor Latino Remus is an irresponsible depiction, or that PWPs are too reductive? Whatever it is, we all have our things.

Let me tell you about my thing. When I first became very ill several years ago, there were various low points in which I felt I had become inherently unlovable. This is, more or less, a normal reaction. When your body stops doing things it used to be able to do - or starts doing things you were quite alright without, thank you very much - it changes the way you relate to your body. You don’t want to hear my whole disability history, so yada yada yada, most people eventually come to accept their limitations. It’s a very painful existence, one in which you constantly tell yourself your disability has transformed you into a burdensome, unworthy member of society, and if nothing else, it’s not terribly sustainable. Being disabled takes grit! It takes power! It takes a truly absurd amount of medical self-advocacy! Hating yourself? Thinking yourself unworthy of love? No one has time for that. 

Of course, I’m being hyperbolic. Plenty of disabled people struggle with these feelings many years into their disabilities, and never really get over them. But here’s the thing. We experience those stories ALL THE TIME. Remember Rain Man? Or Million Dollar Baby? Or that one with the actress from Game of Thrones and that British actor who seemed like he was going to have a promising career but then didn't? Those are all stories about sad, bitter disabled people and their sad, bitter lives, two out of three of which end in the character completing suicide because they simply couldn’t imagine having to live as a disabled person. (I mean, come on media, I get that we're less likely to enjoy a leisurely Saturday hike, but our parking is SUBLIME.) When was the last time you engaged with media that depicted a happy disabled person? A complex disabled person? A disabled person who has sex? No really, these aren’t hypothetical questions, can you please drop a rec in the notes?? Because I am desperate.

There are lots of problems with this trope, and they’ve been discussed ad nauseam by people with PhDs. I’m not actually interested in talking about how this trope leads to a more prevalent societal idea that disabled people are unworthy of love, or contributes to the kind of political thought processes that keep disabled people purposefully disenfranchised. I’m just a bitch on Tumblr, and I have a bone to pick: the thing I really hate about the trope? It’s boring. I’m bored. You know how, like, halfway through Grey’s Anatomy you realized they were just recycling the same plot points over and over again and there was just no WAY anyone working at a hospital prone to THAT MANY disasters would stay on staff? It's like that. I love a recycled trope as much as the next person (There Was Only One Bed, anyone?). But I need. Something. Else.

Remus is disabled. BOLD claim. WILD speculation. Except, not really. You simply - no matter how you flip it, slice it, puree it, or deconstruct it - cannot tell me Remus Lupin is not disabled. Most of us, by this point, are probably familiar with the way that One Canonical Author intended One Dashing Werewolf to be “a metaphor for those illnesses that carry stigma, like HIV and AIDS” [I’m sorry to link you to an outside source quoting She Who Must Not Be Named, but we’re professionals here]. Which is... a thing. It’s been discussed. And, listen, there’s no denying that this parallel is a problematic interpretation of people who have HIV/AIDS and all such similar “those illnesses” (though I’ll admit that I, too, am perennially apt to turn into a raging beast liable to harm anything that crosses my path, but that’s more linked to the at-least-once-monthly recollection that One Day At A Time got cancelled). Critiques aside, Remus Lupin is a character who - due to a condition that affects him physically, mentally, emotionally, and intellectually - is repeatedly marginalized, oppressed, denied political and social power, and ostracized due to unfounded fear that he is infectious to others. Does that sound familiar?

We’re not going to argue about whether or not “Remus is canonically disabled as fuck” is a fair reading. And the reason we’re not going to argue about whether or not it’s a fair reading is because I haven’t read canon in 10-plus years and you will win the argument. Canon is only marginally relevant here. The icon of this blog is brown, curly haired Remus Lupin kissing his trans boyfriend, Sirius Black. We are obviously not too terribly invested in canon. The wolfstar fandom is now a community with over 25,000 AO3 fics, entire careers launched from drawing or writing or cosplaying this non-canonical pairing. We love to play around here with storylines and universes and races and genders and sexualities and all kinds of things, but most of the time? Remus is still disabled. He’s disabled as a werewolf in canon-compliant works, he’s disabled in the AUs where he was injured or abused or kidnapped or harmed as a child, he’s disabled in the stories that read him as chronically ill or bipolar or traumatized or blind or Deaf. I’d go so far as to say that he is one of very few characters in the Wide Wonderful World of media who is, in as close to his essence as one can be, always disabled. And that means? Don’t shoot the messenger... but we could stand to be a tiny bit more responsible with how we portray him. 

Disabled people are complicated. As much as I’d like to pretend we are always level-headed, confident, and ready to assert our inherent worth, we are still just humans. We have bad days. We doubt our worth. We sometimes go out with guys who complain about our steroid-induced weight gain (it was a long time ago, Tumblr, okay??). But, we also have joy and fun and good days and sex and happiness and families and so many other things. 

Remus is a disabled character, and as such, it’s only fair that he’d have those unworthy moments. But - I propose - Remus is also a crip. What is a crip? A crip - like a queer - is someone who eschews the limited boundaries placed on their bodies, who rejects a hierarchy of oppression in favor of an intersectional analysis of lived experience, who isn’t interested in being the tragic figure responsible for helping people with dominant identities realize how good they have it. Crips interpret their disabilities however they want, rethinking bodies and medicine and pleasure and pain and even time itself. Crips are political, community-minded, and in search of liberation. 

Remus is a character who struggles with his disability, sure. But he’s also a character who leverages his physical condition to attempt to shift communities towards his political leanings, advocates for the rights of those who share his physical condition, and has super hot sex with his wrongfully convicted boyfriend ultimately goes on to build community and family. Having a condition that quite literally cripples you, over which you have no control, and through which you are often read as a social pariah? That’s disability. But using said condition as a means through which to build advocacy and community? Now that’s some crip shit. 

Personally, I love disabled!Remus Lupin. But I love crip!Remus Lupin even more. I’d love to see more of a Remus who owns his disability, who covets what makes him unique, and who never ever again tells a potential romantic partner they are too good for him because of his disability. This trope - unlike There Was Only One Bed! - sometimes actually hurts to read. Where’s Remus who thinks a potential romantic partner isn’t good enough for him? Where’s Remus who insists his partners learn more about his condition in order to treat him properly? Where’s sexy wheelchair user Remus? Where’s Remus who uses his werewolf transformations as an excuse to travel the world? Where’s crip Remus??

We don’t have to put “you don’t want me” Remus entirely to bed. It is but one of many repeated tropes that are - in the words of The Hot Priest from Fleabag - morally a bit dubious. And let’s face it - we don’t always come to fandom for its moral superiority (as much as we sometimes like to think we do). 

This is not a condemnation - it is an invitation. Able-bodied folks are all but an injury, illness, or couple decades away from being disabled. And when you get here, I sincerely hope you don’t waste your time on “you don’t want me”ing back and forth with the people you love. I’m inviting you to come to the crip side now. We have snacks, and without all the “you don’t want me” talk, we get to the juicy parts much faster. 

Colorfully,

Mod Theo