#ill be fine dw lol i get like this sometimes so its not a big deal

[tordlover]

bacondonut is back baby !!! 🥓🍩

[causenessus]

HI NESS MY LOVE <333 i hope you’ve had a good morning evening or afternoon!! how’s your day been? make sure u eat !! today i had dim sum with the family and we’re going to a temple now, the weather is so much better than it has been the last few days like tell me why summer is barely doing it’s summer thing like where’s the WARM weather not the HOT IM GONNA DIE weather

also HAVE A GOOD SHIFT!! or i hope you had a good shift WHENEVER YOU READ THIS and omg some grocery store sandwiches are literally so good idk what premade processed stuff it is but sometimes it just HITS like i eat it up like its some gourmet food like something about it is just so good LOL but omg i don’t trust grocery store sushi like the raw fish especially because like i think i’m just extra scared since i’ve had food poisoning before LOL so now i’m like extra extra cautious, but maybe ill try the non-raw ones and report back!!

but OMG THE ANON APOCALYPSE HELLO LIKE WHATS THAT ABOUT? i genuinely got so upset reading on eggy and wry’s blog because im like guys??? lets be nice??? hello??? why are we attacking our smau writers like i was genuinely flabbergasted that they would get hate or you or like ANYONE it’s so crazy, i was thinking of literally revealing my blog because im like i don’t wanna be lumped into the mean anons… LOL it’s not like i have a problem with going un-anon now but i’ve been graced with the name mango ANON so now i feel weird suddenly coming out like heyyy guysss this is the real me in my full glory (reveals myself as an actual mango) (sorry this is so silly LOL)

also STOP UR SO SWEET i might bcuz i <3 talking to you like everytime you reply i have to sit down and genuinely take in everything you say and im always like omg no way omg wait omg this like it’s at a point where i’m switching through my notes app and tumblr so i can read and respond at the same time LOL

but i’m excited for ur project !!! whatever you have planned! but make sure ur also taking care of yourself and SLEEPING!! SLEEP IS IMPORTANT SO MAKE SURE YOU TAKE CARE OF URSELF!! if i have to sing you a lullaby every night i will commit myself to sing you a lullaby !! ALSO THATS SO SWEET “ness has a mango anon” IT DOESNT SOUND MEAN DW!! ur like the sweetest and nicest person ever don’t even worry about being mean, IM THE ONE WORRYING ABOUT BEING MEAN OR BEING TOO MUCH ur doing perfectly fine!

but take care of yourself!! drink plenty of water and EAT!! make sure you eat at work and take care of yourself!! xoxoxo

HELLO AAAA!! i hate missing a day where i don't answer u but at the same time like getting to talk to you TWICE in a day is such a treat!!!! and honestly it's three times if you count you yelling at me to go to bed earlier this morning 😭😭😭 and AA!!! i have't had dim sum in so long i hope it was good!!! and for me idk the weather is like having a stroke??? it's cloudy and then it rains for five seconds and then there's LIGHTING and then suddenly it's 95 degrees outside??? but that's how my state always is 😭 like genuinely most of the time everytime i walk out the door it's different weather

I'M GONNA PUT THE REST OF THIS UNDER A CUT BC I YAPPED SO MUCH BE PREPARED

AND THANK YOU!! tbh omg it was not good 😭 well it WAS good i got some pretty big pieces done i was very proud of it!! because i work in like a framing department :D but then i got called out to help this dude and like??? maybe his daughter or wife idek??? and he was like "i want to frame this thing i have that is this dimensions with a mat so what should i do" and i was like "well you could do this frame we're standing right next to (i didn't say that part) but your mat's gonna be small" and he asked me how much it would cost and BRO I'M SORRY BUT I CAN'T ESTIMATE FOR THE LIFE OF ME BECAUSE IT DEPENDS ON LIKE 50 FACTORS AND I'M STILL A LITTLE NEW so i was like "for that size?? $30 probably" (it is expensive </3) AND SORRY I'LL HURRY UP AND GET TO THE POINT but he was like "no. no. how much would it cost TOTAL?" and i'm gonna start writing this as dialogue bc i'm lazy.

(he had two things he wanted to frame)

me: well this frame is $40 so it's gonna be $70 per one

man's wife/daughter/thing: $40 for a frame? that's outrageous

me: 🧍‍♂️ (i cannot control prices. i am a framer. although i did not build this frame u are basically insulting me to my face and i no longer know what u want me to say and i no longer want to help u.)

me: well. they're on sale. so.

and then i POINT to the "on sale sign" that say BUY ONE GET ONE 50% OFF

man: okay so how much is the sale.

i then stare at the sign i just pointed at.

me: well the sale is buy one get one 50% off. so $60.

him:

me:

him: okay we're going

i then walk away and make a point to glare at his woman for her rude comment

woman: do you have this frame in 16x20? i could only find 14xblahblablah i don't remember

me: no what we have out here is what we have

man: we're going since SHE CAN'T HELP US.

AND THEN THEY CONTINUED TO COMPLAIN ABOUT ME AS THEY WERE WALKING OUT AND SAID I WAS NO HELP AND SOMEONE SHOULD TALK TO ME 😭😭😭 like man bro i told you the prices what did you want me to do barter you and say if you give me a cheese wheel you can have the frame?????????????????????????????? like my coworkers all checked on me afterwards and defended me bc like 😭😭 what did i do 😭😭 SORRY i had to tell someone bc that was lowkey so upsetting and being asked if i was okay right after I ACTUALLY ALMOST CRIED which was a good part!! bc i haven't been able to cry for months (sorry this is so long and such a lore drop) but then i didn't cry bc i didn't want to ruin my makeup LMFAO 😭 and this is probably why my tear ducts gave up on me bc i never let them cry anyway

OKAY SORRY STORY TIME IS OVER AND YOU'RE SO RIGHT ABOUT THE PROCESSED FOOD 😭 like i KNOW that poke bowl was NOT good for me and tbh i really don't like it but i had nothing else to eat 😭😭😭 AND I LOVE YOU SO MUCH I LOVE YOUR SENSE OF HUMOR YOU ARE GENUINELY SO SWEET AND FUNNY <3 when i imagined you making a burner blog 😭😭😭 i literally imagined you making the user mango anon LMAOAOAO but definitely feel free to do that!! CAUSE I DO THE SAME THING I LOVE READING ABOUT YOUR DAYS AND LIKE KEEPING MENTAL NOTES OF EVERYTHING I WANT TO SAY AND HIGHLIGHT !! <333

AND THANK YOU SO MUCH I WILL DEF SLEEP (i am literally drinking a matcha and it is almost midnight and i start school tomorrow. anyway.) BEING SLEEP DEPRIVED WAS NOT A GOOD IDEA TODAY I LITERALLY SHOULD NOT HAVE BEEN ON THE ROADS TODAY BUT I AM STILL ALIVE AND WELL!!! AND I'M SO SO EXCITED TO HEAR WHAT U THINK OF THE ENTIRE PROJECT WHEN IT'S OUT!! <3 take care of yourself and i hope you have a lovely day mango anon!!!! i hope the weather isn't too bad for you and make sure to eat and drink lots of water!! and sleep!! <3

[dropoutparty]

ngc ramblings part 3- chapter 5

here we are at part 3!!! sorry this one took so long, i originally was gonna make this post include entropy and extus (along with finally talking about face in depth) but it was so fuckin long that im splitting it into 2 different posts! the next part isnt done yet but im like almost halfway done so it shouldnt be too much longer until its out! also before we get into this one:

tw for: death, animal death, and suicide. pls take care of urself and don't read this if those things are triggering for u <3

ok lets get on with the post

at the start of entropy zach doesnt waste any time getting right to the point. this place is bigger than the other planets so far, and zach says the music this time around is a melody that “started out normal but then got distorted” played by a violin sounding instrument. even tho i do sometimes forget that this is supposed to be a creepypasta im not surprised that he said it made him feel depressed and unnerved lmao. anyways, this planet has all new level types in it!! no reused ones!! ok now this is epic. the bosses this time around are megalon, battra, and mechagodzilla, but itll be a good while before we get to those guys because this chapter is long as hell holy shit?? buckle up babez <33 now, before i get into the meat of things as usual im gonna talk abt the planet name! entropy basically means “a lack of order/predictability or a gradual decline into disorder” and that's very accurate to this part of the story. at this point, red is pissed off and is getting desperate, which means from here on out things are going to be getting more intense and more unstable. this world is the turning point in the overall story, basically.

now with that out of the way, zach first goes to the worlds quiz level as usual! this time something was different. usually, in the quiz levels there would be goofy ass music playin in the bg (specifically the GH1D0RA cheat music, if you wanna like listen to it ig?) but from here on out its been replaced by the music from the games password screen, which zach called creepy earlier on in the pasta. im gonna glaze over the quiz again this time, but when we get to the next planet ill talk about all of the quizzes in depth all at once. basically all you need to know for now abt what happens here is face asks “do you like mothra?” and when zach picks no (after going on a tangent abt how mothra sucks lmao,, bro i swear im good at the game my controllers just messed up /s), face enters bastard mode and goes “TOO BAD!” and boom now zach cant play as anyone but mothra. zach is pissed for now but little does he know this is just going to become an even more epic gamer bc of this,, youll never get better at something if you never try and all that.

after that, zach moves on to the first level type- the forest. immediately zach gets an eerie feeling from this level bc he has some kinda fear involving forests at night (i can think of a reason why but ill have to talk abt that later just to be sure). hes also not feelin great about being forced to play as mothra, so the pressure of it all is def starting to get to him by now. the music in the forest is woodwinds followed by slow, rhythmic drums and chiming bells. must have been some ominous woodwinds and bells bc it made him feel like he was intruding somewhere he shouldnt be (oh rlly?? u dont say,, everything up until now has been fine /s). getting into the level itself, eventually zach comes across some weird deer-like monsters just vibing and scares them away when he gets close. later in the level he finds more of these weird deer along with a sloth-like creature on some of the trees and some raptor dudes killing some of the deer. zach shoots one of the raptors but thats about it. nothing really happened in this level but zach noted that he didnt feel like he was playing a video game, but instead it felt more like he was exploring a forest in another dimension. thats interesting for reasons ill ~get to later~ (yall must be so tired of hearing that by now omg,, i know im tired of saying it at least. i was gonna wait until after replay to talk about things but i severely underestimated how long this whole project would be, so i might make a post for the “more on that later” stuff before i get into replay. let me know what u think i should do).

anyways, the next thing zach checks out is the first tv screen level so far. these levels just play an animation with some music in the background, and theres a different animation per level. this time around the animation is of a kid with a beaver(?) head licking a lollipop and the music is the GH1D0RA music that the quiz levels used to use. the only thing of note here is that zach says he had a shirt that looked just like that when he was a kid. after that, were off to some of the weirdest fuckin levels in this whole thing imo- the hourglass levels. these levels have an entirely brown color palette, with grandfather clocks standing in the background (the level appears to be in like a hallway or something) and various time measuring things floating in the air. the music is the same as the board (ig cosby just didnt feel like thinking of what theme this place would have lol). after a little bit zach was rlly happy to see actual enemies from the normal game show up! these are basically like aircraft, tanks, etc. thats not the main attraction here tho, bc this level has its own unique mechanic! this mechanic is the colored hourglass items you can pick up. there are three of them, a blue one that slows time down and makes enemies from the past appear, a red one that speeds up time and makes enemies from the future appear, and a green one that made the time flow normally and spawned enemies from the normal game. zach found the blue one first, which caused a bunch of prehistoric enemies based on real animals to show up. after that he found a green one and fought normal enemies again, and then he found a red hourglass. the future enemies here look like aliens to me, and zach says that one enemy reminds him of something he saw in a book once. eventually, a special future creature showed up and zach was suddenly in a boss battle! or a mini boss battle? that description is probably more accurate. this guy doesnt have a face, and he can only attack by shooting a beam from his face, it sure does look cool! after zach beat it tho, he was off to the next level type, which is basically a toxic waste dump.

zach called it grungy and inhospitable, with the music being a synth ambient loop that made him feel dizzy while he listened to it. this is important because this is the first instance of the game making zach feel something *physically*, not just psychologically. all of the enemies here are mutated to some degree, with him first seeing green mummies with bird skulls coming out from vats of toxic slutch and a brownish cow skeleton monster with spider legs. later zach comes across a deer from the woods, drinking some toxic slutch (delinchous). zach got close to it to try making it stopped but suddenly some enemies came out of nowhere and scared it into running right off a ledge and into the slutch. rip :pensive:. after that zach found more mutated enemies (i.e some things with tentacles and some other deformed thing with human teeth) before he finally gets to the end of the level, where theres another miniboss waiting for him!! this ones a toxic sludge monster with a whale skull who attacks with a mouth projectile and by charging into you. the monster sank into the slutch and thats all for this level babeyy!

the next level is another forest, but this time its winter! its still at night, but this time zach doesnt feel off put, which he mostly attributes to the music. he describes it as a gentle, calm song that almost sounded romantic. the entire first segment of this level had no enemies in it, but dw this level is interesting i swear. the next segment starts out just as empty as the last one, but this time its silent. that is, until the music from “unforgiving cold” starts playing. yaa you remember that place!! i think i said it was less interesting than i remembered but its interesting again now bc it was foreshadowing these levels!! anyways soon after the music started up, zach started to come across tons of frozen bodies of the deer from earlier. some were mutilated, some werent, but they were all frozen and covered in snow. eventually zach does come across something living though, a sloth creature from earlier! its just vibing when suddenly the winter versions of the raptors from earlier rush in and fuckin obliterate the sloth thing. those things just blindly try killing everything in sight, and even start fighting themselves before zach finally gets to the last part of the level.

now this is where shit starts to get crayzay. this part opens up to a big empty field with a full moon and the nice music from earlier back. despite the nice music tho, zach immediately starts feeling dread and eventually he finds a lake. the lake comes down from the sky and starts to crack like an egg, a humanoid figure curled up in the fetus position dropping into the lake below and the moon halves disintegrated. this spawned the moon beast, the hardest challenge zachs had to deal with so far. after he finally defeats it, the screen goes to black and the name “melissa” is on screen, written in red. after that, the screen then says kys. the word kill then fills up the screen, layering over itself until it forms a picture of reds face. its now that we finally get to hear abt the whole melissa thing (which makes it sound like shes been mentioned in the pasta before this but thats not what i mean lmao). to summarize, zach had a middle school gf named melissa (also bro middle school?? wadda hell) who often went into “episodes” where she would stare off, expressionless, before trembling and putting her face in her hands. she and zach hung out in a field at night a lot but one night she just stared at the moon the whole time before running into traffic and dying.

NOW its finally later!!! were not done with entropy yet, but this is the end of part one of entropy so i wanna just take a little break to talk about things so far. this planet is FULL of symbolism and foreshadowing. to start off, i think a lot of the questions face asks at the beginning foreshadow things that happen. some examples are “is time slipping though your fingers?” which could allude to the time levels, “do you have any regrets?” which i think obviously foreshadows the whole melissa thing, “is it safe to go out at night?” and “do you find it hard to sleep at night?” both follow the same kinda theme, which i think relates to how the melissa incident happened at night, specifically out at night. i dont think the forest levels have anything too important in them, other than to introduce the presence of an innocent, harmless creature that doesnt deserve what happens to it later (aka the deer things) which might symbolize melissa. more evidence for this symbolizing melissa comes from the encounter with the deer in the toxic dump and the winter forest, where in the former zach tries to stop it from hurting itself but is too late, being forced to watch it die, and in the latter the same innocent thing from earlier is found dead close to where the real incident took place. the two big themes to keep in mind here are death and time, more specifically the past. most of the enemies here are either made from bones or kill other enemies, there's a dedicated time level referencing things that zach remembers seeing at one point (aka that one alien zach recognized), the beaver head had the same shirt as child zach did, it all connects to zachs past and the death of melissa. as for the moon beast, its the most obvious reference for reasons ive already explained. i dont really know what the moon cracking open and dropping a curled up human into the lake could mean other than some other thing melissa related, but i *do* think that the fact that the moon beast is the most difficult thing zach has faced so far is symbolic of the fact that the trauma from this event has followed him throughout his entire life, and its something he struggles with daily. it could even be the reason why he said no when face asked if he could sleep easily at night. the moon beast also has some black fur around its neck, which i think is meant to represent a tire track, referencing and/or mocking the way melissa died.

its so cool how this entire part of the story builds up to and foreshadows the bomb it drops at the end of the part, giving people something to look back on. a lot of ppl say that as soon as the melissa stuff gets introduced the story goes down in quality, and i do somewhat agree with that sentiment, especially if they want the story to actually be scary, but i think the direction the story goes from this point on is so unique and cool. it does follow the whole “theres a ghost in the game” troupe (even tho it was probably seen as a spin on that originally) but it doesnt do the same cliches as so many other gaming creepypastas do and it really takes the concept and makes it its own. i just think its neat,,,

anyways im done gushing abt this story, lets get on with part 2 of extus!! basically zach has a fuckin panic attack and, after taking a few minutes to calm himself down when its over, he decides that he has to finish the game now because if he doesnt its just going to haunt him for the rest of his life. zach has now realized that the game is “alive” and can somehow see his thoughts and memories, so understandably hes pretty freaked out by it at this point. when he keeps playing, the first thing he does is check out another tv screen level. this time, the animation is of a fish dude just kinda standing there with his mouth flapping open and closed and the music is the neptune board music from the original game. the only reason i can think of for why this is here is maybe the game is mocking zach for the panic attack he just had (bc when u have a panic attack you feel like you can barely breathe, if ur lucky enough to have never had one before and u dont know) but thats abt it. its probably just a random goofy thing cosby threw in there.

anyways, the next actual level is the first labyrinth level. this time around, its a gold labyrinth specifically. the music in these levels is a slow, ominous drum beat with female vocals occasionally coming in and (basically from here on out) the monster zach plays as is now half the size it used to be. i think this shows how zachs feeling at this point, like this whole thing isnt just being a big strong monster and beating up enemies any more, he feels small and scared and helpless in the face of something potentially dangerous that he doesnt understand maybe his confusion about the game is the reason *why* theres so many labyrinth levels here in the first place. anyways im getting ahead of myself. personally, i think the aesthetic of the gold labyrinth is very similar to the green temples back on trance. while trance had a more circular and soft theme to it's architecture and sculpture, entropys is much more square or rectangle oriented. despite this, i think that the golden mazes at least are another religious kind of building, and the architecture is just different because theyre two different cultures who just happen to worship the same spiritual figure (aka melissa. did i say that earlier? i think i did,, if i didnt well the religions worship melissa, not knowing she's a dead human or anything. probably).

moving on, zach notes how the gold labyrinth would probably have been impossible to navigate as any of the other monsters, so turns out face being an asshole was a blessing in disguise after all huh? anyways this place is full of weird gold monsters, lava/fire traps, and stone faces (both in more of an easter island head style and in the regular feminine headshot weve seen so far). zach comes across two feminine heads, one that is more adult looking and pure gold, and another one that looks much younger and whos eyes have red irises and blue scleras. this statue apparently looks a lot like melissa did on the night she died, so zach leaves it pretty quickly. i *think* this is the first time we see the color blue associated with melissa? if it isnt sorry abt that, its been a couple days since i worked on ngcr so ive forgotten some of the smaller or more subtle things by now. GOD i keep getting side tracked ANYWAYS eventually zach finds a non-gold enemy and sees it get picked up by like an arcade crane claw. hes curious so he follows the claw, only to see the monster be put in a big gold cauldron and walk out the side of it as a gold monster.

gonna be honest, no idea what the hell this could mean. like? theres been no themes of corruption or good things becoming evil so far so this just kinda. exists,, yea idk lol. im not part of like any discord servers or anything so all this theorizing and analysis has just been me, maybe getting some small ideas from like random youtube comments or something, so if something ive said so far has been unanimously disagreed with somewhere i dont know about it. thats also why this isnt really a definitive or comprehensive analysis (even tho im trying to be as comprehensive as i can).

anyways zach finds the exit soon after and hes on to the next level type (there's so fucking many of them ik dont worry weve almost gotten to all of them now), the indigo cliffs. the background of these levels is similar to the blue mountains from trance, but now the moon and clouds from the toxic dump background is also here (and colored indigo to match). the music here is just a deep rumbling noise. the first “enemies” he sees here are just a bunch of multicolored little guys coming out of a hole in the ground and jumping off a cliff. were continuing the death theme yall!! anyways zach continues, flying over some more weird creatures (tho some of them just look like dinosaurs lol) before he sees a bunch more of the multicolored guys out and about but this time theyre getting grabbed by birds!! wadda heel!!! zach comments on how the multicolored dudes seem eager to die and thinks maybe the moon has something to do with it (like melissa dude wat!!!! that's crazy /s). at the end of the level there were some more multicolored dudes just walking into a creatures mouth so zach attacked the thing and killed it and the levels over yay!

now its time for the bosses babeyy!!! first zach fights battra (basically an evil moth kaiju), the music is varans theme. battra starts off in his larvae form, where he basically just fought by running into you and shooting stuff at you. while fighting this form, zach noticed that the game buffed mothra because his gamer skillz were too cringe lmaoo. he beats the larvae form and battra goes into his second form, where hes basically a stronger clone of mothra (misogyny). zach fights battra and has fun doing it (for once,, good for him) and he wins yay! next hes fighting megalon (a big beetle/bug kaiju), whos music was gigans theme. im tired when im writing this so ill just give you zachs description of how he fought: “strong, persistent, but dumb”. after this, zach checks out the last tv screen of entropy. this time, it shows a big buff guy with a sack over his head hit a womans head with a sledgehammer while shes tied to a table or something. the music for it was the password theme. i think this is probably here because red is getting angrier? like this guy is still here after i triggered his ptsd?? what the hell!!!

anyways before we get to the last boss we have one last level type to get through- the shadow labyrinth. at this point, zach starts to feel drained because no shit sherlock you just had a panic attack and youve been playing this game for fuckin several hours at this point of course youre fuckin drained. anyways zach enters the shadow labyrinth, which is a black recolor of the gold labyrinth. the music is “evil ambience” similar to unforgiving colds music but distinctly different apparently. there werent any enemies so zach just kinda wandered for a while until the lights turned off, darkening the whole screen and (secretly) spawning tons of spooky enemies thatll chase and hit mothra in the dark. eventually the lights came back on and zach started scrambling to the exit. when the lights turned back off, zach was able to find one of the melissa looking statues and stood next to it. it warded off the monsters while the lights were off, so zach was safe. i think this shows 2 things: 1) its a little more validation for my “religion in this world worships melissa” theory and 2) it foreshadows the way melissa wants to protect zach at the end of the game. zach beat the shadow labyrinth a lot faster than the gold one so were done with all the stages now!! now theres only the last boss and red and were done with entropy!

the last boss is mechagodzilla, but when zach starts the level, normal godzilla is there instead!! its whatever tho bc soon the disguise is gone and its just pretty much the normal mechagodzilla fight (but now hes got a gay beam). at about half health tho, mechagodzillas sprite breaks into pieces like gezoras did way back on earth and reforms into not-mechagodzilla. even tho it looks uncanny (and the usage of the face statue on the front is probably there to further mock zach bc melissa) zach beats it p easily and now its time for the chase. ba dum ba dum thats the sound of a chase.

as usual tho, before i get to the red chase its time to talk about entropy as a planet!! i think the best way to describe the layout is “a big forest with a toxic waste dump in it takes up half the planet while the other half is a large religious temple/labyrinth with a dangerous underbelly”. there doesnt seem to be any intelligent life there now (its all dead by now probably) but there was at some point at least because imean the huge labyrinth is there dude!!! i dont have much to say for this section tbh bc i feel like i've already said everything i wanted to, so its time for the chase ig!!

basically the chase with red here takes place in a labyrinth level bc of course it does. this labyrinth, however, seems to be made of some kind of organic matter. is it flesh? organs? nondescript viscera? idk but it's pulsating and bloody. also this time red has wings too!! anyways, basically zach avoids red throughout the maze, red breaks through one of the walls with his big alien tongue, and zach gets to the end of the maze. nothing crazy happens at the end of this chapter (i think it was crazy enough as is) so thats the end of that and now its time for the penultimate planet- extus.

[neo-shitty]

toffee!

hehe glad i could make you laugh, oooh that sounds awesome! yeah id love to be tagged it sounds great :)

YES the differences are so fucking weird. like, they do know they're the same age right? i feel like its just an exagguration of how much the persons role in the group matters, like we see chan being held up as such a mature, old leader while jungkook who is literally the same age, is still babied etc. like enha hyung line is basically the same age (if a bit younger) as chenle and jisung but somehow the rules are different?? as you point out, still legal but still bizarre. hehe yeah, i mean where else are we going to rant? quora lol. mmm, hopefully more people can just write less smut abt people who are barely adults

ah, no prob it didnt take long. yeah i think thats right (i keep forgetting you know my url lol) mmhmm :( i think if that happened irl there would be some major trauma going on. knock wood it never happens to you or me lol (/hj)

hehe same! oooh glad Redemption For Cheese was realised! yess we cant rllycomplain that theyve written/produced too much good music lol. yeah, ive dragged him into being a stay so *dusts hands off* mission accomplished. mmm yeah, they tend to have a certain vibe but tbh it couldve worked if they were any other group but ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ ahh ur one step ahead of me on the stages of listening to ssick i think, still not convinced but thats okay! hehe, it had to be said. yesss the itch in the back of my brain is very satisfied by sorry i love you, felixs vocals deserve to be appreciated! (side note i feel like hes trying to sing more like his speaking voice, sorta husky, but tbh i wouldnt be mad if he sang like in glow, his sweet honey vocals made my life lol. but i think ive heard him say he doesnt like singing like that cos it makes his normal voice less husky, so what can you do)

> YES SOMEONE SAID IT. seungmin rap KING, he sped thru that rap like it was nothing, he deserves more rap lines. i do like how they gave minho some melodic rap lines this comeback, my guy deserved to show off those skills that made him not be eliminated (flashbacks to stay collectively wanting to murder jyp) and we already know changbin can sing, my man murdered masked singer. hyunjin can obviously sing as can jisung and felix, and i want to hear chan rap more! i feel like he started as part of 3racha (as a rap unit not producing) and then just became a vocalist (which im fine with, but it could be nice to hear him flex his rapping skills) and was partially replaced by hyunjin. anywayyy

back to album talk. lmaooo sad music to twerk to PERFECTLY describes silent cry. yes secret secret is and will always be, a masterpiece. hehe glad i could make you laugh :) i just felt like they have similar vibes. putting off skz stuff bc of not having time to cry IS the kpop stan life summarised. oh my beloved track, red lights. ahh thats okay, we can have different opinions, but by god the lyrics are *chefs kiss*. *banging on table* TWISTED AU TWISTED AU TWISTED AU. yess id love to see ur take on it! sdfghjkl it would have been glorious

no no! not stupid, just able to predict my brainwaves. ooooh thats so cool! makes me want to go there (wherever there is lol) yeah the waves are pretty good here, but none of my familys a surfer, so we dont rlly enjoy the full potential lol. YES moving on to gone away, it is indeed a heartwrenching track, but the vocals and the bloody key change? makes me want to brave being sad just to listen to it. mmm yeah, good point :( i feel like ive just gotten used to overthinking so much so that it doesnt matter what mood im in, ill do it anyway, so might as well just do what i feel like doing anyway.

yeah i think ur right! it is quite comforting knowing that all the tracks will get the love they deserve. i feel like also people assume kpop is just one genre which is utter bs. there are so many different vibes and feels and songs, i couldnt get into kpop (of which i thought only the bright cheerful present day bts stuff existed smh) until i heard gods menu so... idk where i was going with this but yeah. :)

YES FUCK YG, theyre literally on the brink of being kicked out of the big three and they are holding their salvation hostage without letting them do ANYTHING. idek what thought process goes thru their minds but arghhh its so infuriating. yess lisa's cb will be awesome but ot4 is the gold standard here.

hehe, glad u could get to this point. no no! u dont sound like a cult member at all lol yeah, i loooove some of their songs but the whole 23 members thing is getting to me. thats prob a common problem with nctzens but what can i say? im a simple girl with a limit to how many korean boys i can give my money to. atm im just trying to get into ateez and finish memorising enhypen's faces. also kard is kinda sucking me into their fandom atm, as well as eric name lol. ah what can you do? ooh thats good!

hehe i love it too! its exactly like online penpals, that was rlly well put. aww ty! hmm im okay, recovering from a bad case of rsv so thats fun. im doing okay mentally, starting therapy soon (after having to convince my mother that its not just smth i can brush off). physically i wont go into, basically i should be doing stretches to help but they dont completely fix it so my lazy ass doesnt do them, plus i got told recently im going to be stuck with this condition for the rest of my life so thats fun! ah, before you type smth dw abt me ill be fine. the weather atm is cloudy but warm, its been raining on and off today which is good for the garden. uhh i just finished reading sunburnt veils and im in the middle of prom theory which is rlly good. ummm ive got a concert tonight? that i may or may not be able to sing in (bc of the whole rsv thingo) and uhhhh idk. my dog is cute? im drinking tea rn? ive got a school dance coming up?

wbu? hows ur day going, how are you? whats the weather like on ur end? done anything interesting lately? found smth that makes you rlly happy? just any random thing youve been dying to tell someone?

no no! dont apologise, i love these exchanges. i think im happy to continue them for a long time :) on the other hand, if you get tired of them, feel free to just not answer at any time. goodness gracious this was a long ask haha hope it isnt too annoying

<3 w.a. 🐺

sorry it took me a bit to reply, i was fixing my theme ;n;

yeah, i figured it was because of the roles too. my friends and i still get taken aback when 3rd gen idols are the same age as 4th gen ones. in my head it doesn't add up sometimes. PLS THE RANT AT QUORA SKJDK tbh tho it's just going to be normalized as the years pass? esp that the boys are growing older and the amount of explicit fics will just increase. i might have to start blocking tags.

i had to look up the previous ask to remember what we were talking about xd i hope the events in champagne problems never happens to anyone. realistically, it probably happens a lot. damn i really won't wish that pain on anyone. dragging your brother into being a stay i whEEZED JFKSA additional noeasy music enthusiast o.o and ALL I CAN SAY WITH YOU GUSHING ABT FELIX IS AHA WHIPPEEEED OML can't blame you tho, i also want to hear felix sing more in other shades (if that makes sense HAHA) i really hope they'll do the role exchange in the next comeback :( or like in the near future bc i know they can do it :( the day i hear seungmin rapping it i will respectfully pass away. minho was given more lines this comeback thank fUCK i could rmb my irl being vocal abt her frustration. i don't get why minho barely has center time/lines in title tracks??? like the line distribution in the past eras just made me ???? if seventeen can balance lines with 13 members why cant a group of 8 do the same? moving on. i haven't watched the stray kids show simply bc i don't want to cry HAJS but i've seen clips. imagine if skz debuted without minho and felix?!?!? i rmb another irl catching bias feels towards changbin bc of the masked singer only to find out that the man's a rapper. i love how skz's vocals were highlighted this comeback :c there were a lot of mellow tracks! i find it cute when chan sings/raps bc it gets kinda obvious that he's a foreigner? the accent (im not even sure if it's the accent) it just shows. "putting off skz stuff bc of not having time to cry IS the kpop stan life summarised." CORRECT.

abt the twisted au o.O i'll inquire my irl if she wants to write it or not. if she doesn't want to, i'll do it. i miss writing twisted aus <3___<3 and i also miss going to the beach with my friends :' ) but it's starting to get cold here and i don't think i'll be able to enjoy the beach as much as i would if i went beaching in the summer. so maybe next summer? gone away really has an sm-ballad vibe. the thing about skz being a self-producing group, their songs don't sound like typical jype songs? and i just appreciate that bc in all honesty im not a fan of jyp groups at all. PLS the overthinking. i wish i could mute overthinking.

anyone who assumes kpop is just one genre obv hasn't listened to a single track. if kpop was just one genre why do i like some tracks more than the others??? oh you've only recently become a kpop stan? tbh im not a fan of the bright songs of bts either. i liked their older ones *chefs kiss* really matched high school vibes. yg has good artists and they're just wasting the talent ~.~ that strategy they have will get tiring eventually. people will stop waiting on blackpink and move on to newer more active groups ://

HAHAHAH yeah the 23 members is pretty overwhelming! it was the reason i didn't bother stanning before quarantine started. i don't regret stanning tho, met my ult bias in that group <3___<3 i don't really purchase albums unless i like the tracks xd ohhh getting into ateez just in time for the comeback! let me know what you think about them! i was fond of them at some point but grew out of it. good luck with memorizing enhypen! it took me a while to distinguish to people there XD i haven't checked out kard yet but chan plays their songs during lives and they're sexc hype music me likey *u*

i had to look up rsv im sorry. i'm glad you're recovering! please rest more and don't stress yourself out. bro i wish i could go to therapy too bc i have weird issues i can't justify and i need a professional to tell me what's the reason behind it. stuck with what condition btw? what happened? i'm sorry in case i just forgot. yesterday was a bit rainy for me too :(( it's not the type of rainy that makes me anxious so B) oh concert! good luck and i hope you'll be able to sing but i also don't think it's best for you rn :c what's your dog's breed? and yes i just finished drinking tea too. AAAAA i miss school dances :(( the last one i was supposed to have was cancelled bc of covid.

i was less productive today and i'm teetering between being mentally stable and becoming a hermit again. i'm anxious with a lot of things atm so like : D not the best state. today it was a bit sunny but not hot hot which was nice. i changed my theme today bc i couldn't wait for sept. 1st. and no i haven't found anything that makes me happy HAHAHA shit like that's hard to identify. don't have anything to say too, i'm just thinking about why i'm procrastinating too much atm T_T and i'm listening to this rap song atm and one of the rappers sounded like han.

it isn't annoying! i enjoy the long exchanges but i do admit it takes me awhile to type down a reply. so if i get more busy, it'll prolly take a bit longer for me to reply.

[jestbee]

Fic Read Round-up 12th Oct 2018

A list of fic I read this week and recommend (wips not included)

Sorry there wasn’t one last week, I didn’t read much. This week I read too much. Go figure. 

Disclaimer: I spent a lot of time re-reading people’s fic and back catalogues this week so there will be a lot of repeat writers. I don’t apologise for this, going through people’s pages and reading a lot when I’m feeling down is something I like to do. These writers comfort me when things seem hopeless.

Dan/Phil

cold feet by @waveydnp

M 3.3k Foot fetish fic from the amaaf verse. This is actually so beautiful, I’m in love. 

paint it on your face by @onedirectionticketss1

M 574 soulmate marks with a twist. Funny and lovely, an all round good read. 

Beside You I’m a Loaded Gun by ramonaspeaks

E 958 Phil wakes up still hard from the night before. Fun fact: this is my most re-read fic in the phandom.

witness by @velvetnautilus

G 818 Dan makes coming out videos but he never shows them to anyone. Other than Phil. 

nothing feels better by @waveydnp

M 2.5k I just really really love fwb okay? Them not being able to say what they want to say but their actions being so obvious that you just want to shake them. But Sarah writes them so beautifully that it hurts so good. ugh. 

unashamed, wide open for joy by @queerofcups

E 10.8k Okay, what happened was shapes and weights to choose (look at me defying my own rule of not mentioning wips - lol no regrets) updated. So I re-read it from the beginning. Twice. (ao3 tells me I’ve visited this fic 65 times and thats only the ones where I was logged in) and then I was thinking about Porn Star Phil because, well, why wouldn’t you? And then I remembered this fic wherein Phil is also a porn star and Dan is a youtuber and there is a mix up when he tells Phil he makes videos on the internet and it’s just really good and so I re-read this too. 

Unlatch by @queerofcups 

E 1.6k Phil can’t get over it when Dan makes the joke about sucking dick in Living my Truth and starts holding out on him. After re-reading the above fic I started going back and re-reading a bunch more because I have my faves and I re-read all the time. 

(your love) feels like all four seasons by @queerofcups

E 1.5k Dan and Phil at the Lester’s trying to be quiet. Told you I’m not apologising for reccing the same author one million times this week. 

everybody told me it was bad to do by @queerofcups

M 1.1k Phil’s boyfriend is downstairs and yet they’re doing stuff anyway. I have a confession that I actually really love fics where the relationship is a bit fucked up? Like I don’t think fic needs to always be representative of like healthy communication or whatever because it isn’t a relationship guide, it’s fiction. And this is a perfect example of a really interesting dynamic. I love. 

Birthday Sex by @danfanciesphil

E 233.7k friends with benefits, so angsty but with the happiest ending. Okay, I sort of blame @charlottekath for this because she re-read this recently and then I thought... okay I’ll re-read it too and I got a bit broken in the middle like I always do but by the time I reached the end it was okay. I did however have to go read some stuff where it wasn’t all turbulent for them to make myself feel better. 

Give Me A Try by @danfanciesphil

E 72.9k Instagram model Phil and bartender Dan. I love Phil, I love Dan being a fan of Phil. I like the teasing and the banter and the sexual tension. This cured all my ills. 

L'Histoire Française by @danfanciesphil

E 105.5k Teacher Phil and teaching assistant Dan. More lovely sexual tension with a good pay off. I had no ills left but I thought, while on a good writer’s page, might as well read some others too. I almost completed the set. 

L'Histoire de L'Amour by @danfanciesphil

E 2.9k a valentines day follow up to the above. Because I like to see them settled and happy. ahhhh. 

Raise your arms and hold by @danfanciesphil

M 10.3k Phil rents a flat across from Dan and their balconies face each other. Dan is depressed, Phil has plants. 

if there's a line, then I think that we crossed it by @tobieallison

unrated 797 2010!Phan might be my fave??? when they’re working it out and going through that really exciting just-in-love stuff. makes me feel all warm.

Daddy Kink by @danfanciesphil

E 9k Phil thinks the daddy kink thing is weird until one day things change. The only daddy kink fic that needs to exist honestly. 

Frustration by ramonaspeaks

E 8.4k Dan has hand surgery and can’t do anything for himself. Phil helps out. 

Look don’t judge the amount of smut I read this week, okay? I had a really bad week and sometimes when I’m in a really dark place I like to read smut and see people be happy because fluff is too cloying for me in that headspace sometimes but smut doesn’t tend to be as like, nice. 

Temptations by ramonaspeaks

E 2.7k baking and then some getting together smut, perfect

Terrifying Truths And Drunken Dares by @danfanciesphil

E 9.8k Dan and Phil get drunk and play truth or dare. Yeah, I went back to Ellen’s page because I hadn’t read everything yet. 

Holding Back by ramonaspeaks

E 3k 2009 phan and Phil teaching Dan how to give him a blow job

The Hottest Day by ramonaspeaks

E 3k It’s a hot day and Dan has ice to cool down things take an interesting turn - some more getting together smut

Waking Up by ramonaspeaks

E 2.6k Uni AU where Dan stays in Phil’s dorm room and they wake up together

litany in which certain things are crossed out by nokomisfics, recklessfishes

E 21.4k another of my absolute favourites of all time. Dan is a writer and a bit shit and Phil is a student he has a one night stand with and then falls into a kind of fwb relationship with and its just so so good but I always manage to forget about the ambiguous ending when I read it and then I’m left a little sad 

naked sofa battle royale by @alittledizzy

E 1.3k Phil likes playing fornite naked and he likes incentives to win Dan takes advantage of that. 

the sun a souvenir by deletable_bird

E 10.8k Dan is an art student with a final assignment and no model. He meets Phil at a coffee shop. I also kind of had a thing for coffee shop AUs this week, as will become apparent. 

Immediate Family by sasiml

G 1.3k Dan and Cornelia talking about family and how they are the same but different. I already reblogged this but I’m adding it here too as I really do recommend it

shift into overdrive by @alittledizzy

E 1.2k Dan and Phil can’t have sex on the tour bus, but they can do other things. I had a bad week and I wanted to read my fave ever trope from one of my fave ever writers, okay?

keep a place for me by @waveydnp

E 14.1k I know everyone knows Sarah is a genius at this point but I don’t think this particular fic gets as much love as it should. YouTuber AU slow burn and a lot of sorting their shit out

waiting to be found by @alittledizzy

M 15.1k Dan and Phil meet at a club, and then again at a coffee shop and the universe must just want them that way.  I remember reading this as it came out and just loving it and I still love it with every re-read. (17 times according to ao3 because I always open entire work at once)

waiting outside the lines by @alittledizzy

T 22.8k There is a coffee shop and some uni parties as a music festival and charlie is there along with Cat but it isn’t angsty, they’re just figuring stuff out and it’s beautiful. The ending is wonderful. 

closer to where I started by @alittledizzy

M 10.6k Dan gets injured and Phil worries and it leads them to some big decisions (dw, Dan is fine in the end) This kind of hurt/comfort is the best tbh. If you’re on a Dizzy kick and re-reading, you can’t not re-read this one, can you?

get me up get me out (of my mind) by @alittledizzy

E 2k Phil is having some issues, but Dan is there to help. I love Phil in this, and I love Dan. I love it all. 

back to those tokyo nights by @waveydnp

M 3k this coincidentally dropped as I was reading the previous and my ‘Phil being his age’ thirst was well and truly quenched. I love Phil being older, I love mentions of him doing their taxes. I love him being insecure about it and Dan assuring him he still thinks he’s really fucking hot. But most of all I love how true this is to the depiction of a long-term relationship. How predictability doesn’t necessarily mean boring It mean you’ve worked out what you like. how damn, this is a good fic. 

Crawling back to you by definitelythor (yourlionheartx)

E 14.4k Phone sex, and kind of fwb. They have phone sex alot until they move in together and then it stops. Until it doesn’t. 

[yeancollab]

oh my gOD HSJSHS ur love essay for/about wonho... is so cute and god i can relate and from zero is playing rn... mister wonho if ur out there i lOVE YOU!!! i really like from zero tbh,,, to me its the best song on the code what do you think?? back 2 the wonho love tm ... i can totally agree with you?? my friend introduced me to mx and told me wonho likes to take off his shirt (which is fine! its great that hes confident!!) so i was like o gosh.... and i kind of?? turned a blind eye to him...

(2) initially but when i watched the variety shows they were on i really… fell so hard :^( hes so sweet and like you said he really love each and every monbebe

(3) wonh*e bc,, thats so…. mMMMm idk maybe im too young to have real opinions but it doesnt sit right with me >:-0.. anyway!! seeing as youve been with monsta x for a long time and since they were your ult group at one point for awhile,, which era is your favourite?? in terms of songs, dance and visuals/looks!! i really like all in!!! because the song is so good and i like all of the songs in the clan series :-O hero is also super catchy and its one of the first songs i heard too!!….

the choreo for all in is a also smth i really like!! i have preference for choreos with the whole.. circling around one member???/ also ! hyungwons solo followed by wonho in the second verse heals me every time

(4) its not smth u have to do though!! but thank you for the thought!! i hope you have a good day and i googled and it said that your 5am is my 6pm????? is it 5am there…. bc its 6pm now :-O o thats right i saw that this is ur sideblog??? whats your mainblog mostly about then??? okie ill end it here i wanted to ask smth else but i forgot :-( poor mans memory… i love you and ur rly sweet thank you for being so nice

woo okay hello bb!

i agree i love from zero so much!! my favorite songs on the code are tropical night n from zero! i found out recently that its inspired by one of my favorite movies called ‘your name’ and that makes me feel even more connected to wonho,,, cutie. also ur right abt the wonh*e thing dw abt being too young.. its cringy and mean :/

my fave mx era is stuck!! also all in is a close second. i rlly like our current dramarama era too hmm.. stuck is my favorite bc first of all it was wonho’s song!! great. i also really liked the styling i thot it was cute. even tho i love black hair wonho i have such a soft spot for blonde wonho.. i liked everyone’s hair during stuck era.. idk changkyun’s fighter hair was gr8 tho.. me.. rambling for hours abt hair.. but ya the stuck choreo is also really good so the combination makes that my fave era! but ur so right about Miss All In.. the hyungwon x wonho back to back solo is my favorite part too! i feel like visual line tends to have infrequent lines sometimes (esp in older songs) but their always rlly juicy good lines!

i do watch their stuff on v live! i haven’t in a min so im behind but i looove those types of videos. its honestly so cool how even tho they get so busy they record  those things for us. it makes u feel close to them ahh. 

anyways this is my main blog lol! my links are always broken in my description bc tumblr is hell but i have two sideblogs, one for nct jaehyun/aes stuff and one for mx called hiyoungwon. im terrible at keeping up w them but im trying harder these days haha

also dang u must live far from me lmao. it must be 5:30 am there now huh.. tell me who ur bias is :O unless u did already n i forgot,, and since its morning there, have a good day!!

[neo-shitty]

toffee!

no dont apologise! i didnt check until just then so np :)

mmm yeah it is a bit trippy. hehe ITS TRUE THO. yeah sadly i think ur right, and tag blocking is probably a good idea. sometimes smut written well or not in excess is okay but goddamn when its abt 01 line and thats the whole fic... *silently blocks tags*

hehe i do that all the time lol this conversation is carrying on threads from a month ago :) mmm yeah ur probably right sadly, same. HA HE DIDNT HAVE A CHOICE and now i have someone to talk to abt them, so thats good! I KNOW felix was actually the one who got me into skz with his iconique gods menu line so i guess i have a soft spot for him. i always tell myself my bias is chan but ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ guess im more whipped than id like to admit. mmm yeah that does make sense dw i hope they do that as well. YES king seungmin hIMSELF. GODDAMNIT DONT GET ME STARTED ON MINHO IN GODS MENU I DIDNT EVEN KNOW HE WAS PART OF THE GROUP UNTIL I STARTED GETTING MORE INTO THEM. BITCH (affectionate) THE LINE DISTRIBUTION HAS BEEN UTTER DOG SHIT but *deep breath* its better now so were moving on adn hoping it stays that way. sis same but i may or may not have gone thru a rlly depressed phase and actively sought out the elimination episodes so i could actually force some tears out of my emotionless shell of a heart but what cna you do? lmaoo i feel that irl, binnie deserves more vocal lines. yesss channies accent is rlly prominent then, i think also the way he structures his phrasing? is more english speaking than korean? but yeah i totally get what ur saying. AJKSAL lmao

okay then! im excited for whenever it gets done! (maybe tag me?) ahh the cold shrivelled heart of a dark au writer beats again at the thought of torturing another poor characters very soul (/j) :(( yeah that would suck not being able to see them. ohhh ur on the other hemisphere to me! were just going into spring rn. mmm smth to look forward to! YES you put it into words. they rlly are pretty independent from the company (remember how jyp rejected that other dudes songs after like 3 seconds and then how he was apparently nervous to show the song hed written to chan cos chan was so good at writing hits ahhh sweet revenge) mmmYES we rlly need a mute and remove notifications button for our brains dont we?

YES CORRECT i totally agree. some people jsut dont give it a try, adn assume its bad cos its korean smh racist assholes. yes! im coming up to my 6 month anniv actually! sis sAME, i feel like theyre being tugged into appealing to the western american market and theyre not staying as true to their artistic flair as a group, especially with only writing english songs atm. *sigh* ah well, at least theyre bringing recognition to the kpop world. AHUH dead on, theyre going to be discarded pretty soon and then where will bp be? theyll prob go solo paths which is rlly sad but what can you do when the company is run by a prideful asshole? yg is not going to last much longer in the big four if they keep this up.

hehe you get it. oooh very cool! whos ur ult? (sorry if youve said this before) mmmm yeah good decision, i feel liek thats probably a wise decision. this is my first album release as a kpop stan (not counting mixtape oh) so i think ill get it for sentiments sake. yeah! im excited for the new music! mingi was the one who got me into them, but atm my bias is seonghwa followed by san, wooyoung and ateez but jonghos high notes man *swoon* he, yeah atm ive got jake, jay, nikki, jungwon and sunoo down so just trying to get the rest :) heh, yeah kard i rlly only got into cos of bm, ive seen him like interacting with a lot of idols and he seemed nice so i decided to check out the group. ikr gunshot man *another swoon*

no noe! i didnt know what it was until i got it lol. thx toffee ill try and take that to mind :) yeah lol im on a waiting list thats not going to be free until late september so hopefully i can hold on until then. hope ur okay, that sounds like it sucks, hope you can find someone. maybe ill just take you along on my phone and the therapist can get a two for one patient deal lmaooo. mmm, sorry no i havent mentioned it before, i dont rlly talk abt it much. uhhh basically hypermobility? if you google it, it doesnt seem bad, jsut joint flexibility but ive got the severe end of the stick, leaning towards ehlers danlos syndrome so thats fun. basically it just makes it hard for me to exercise, run, jump, stand or just walk for long periods of time and gives me a lot of joint and muscle pain so... thats fun! but obviously so many other people have it worse than me, so i try not to complain. normally in young people it will improve as they get older, but my doctor said bc its severe in me, its unlikely to get much better. but again, i dont have the worst lot in the bunch, so its all g.

oh its good that its not the bad type of rain, a light sprinkling can be relaxing sometimes. aww thx darl, the concern is appreciated but it went pretty well and i managed not to cough too much on stage or kill myself trying to run around to the other side of the stage in the pouring rain so thats good! oooh tea buddies! my dogs a labradoodle, but shes a bit more of a feral poodle lol not much labrador in her at all, unless its her relentless urge to hunt down every bird that has ever walked this earth smh :((( hopefully they can come back on soon, does uni have dances?

ahhh a mood if i ever heard one. hopefully things will get better for you soon, ik anxiety sucks ass. ooh thats always good! when its sunny here, its always melt ur thongs to the pavement hot so the nicely cool sunny days are a lovely change. hehe impatience is not so good for you, but good for us that get to see ur beautiful theme early. ahh no worries, itll come eventually hopefully. and if not, then just things that make you not anxious are good. it doesnt have to be black or white, sometimes gray is good. mmmmm sames i have midterms this week to catch up on and then two weeks of end of terms so thats fun! i hope u can overcome that a little, heres some channie to be ur motivation https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=a8LWyNjzOww. hah! i hear that all the time, he seems to be everywhere. did you see that tiktok of hans slowed back door rap, i stg it sounded EXACTLY like namjoon, it kinda scared me. also teh beginning of another day, sounds so much like joon i swear.

that reminds me! idk ur biases! i feel like this should be smth i should know so please! feel free to elaborate!

ahh im glad, i was worried it is. mmm same, so no hard feelings if either of us misses a day or smth. ill start worrying if weeks/months have gone by, but if its just a little while thats more than fine. ill just picture you studiously completing notes and i wont worry lol

<3 w.a. 🐺

at some point i really think i'm going to start blocking accounts because blocking tags won't be enough. i saw ask tags the other day and it just made me want to bleach my eyeballs.

i could talk about god's menu felix for hours man. the teaser for god's menu that featured his part on the bridge made me look forward to the mv release. you: biases chan, also you: lixiesbabyhands. yes you are more whipped than you think. i can't believe orange haired minho was given NOTHING during that era but they kind of made up for it in the b-sides. i also hope it stays that way. the distribution for this era was pretty fair.

"torturing another poor character's soul" in all honesty, i used to live for this. 2017 me leading up to early 2020 wrote nothing but angst. i have another aussie friend on twt and tbh i'm still really (O.o) about the seasons! jyp should be terrified skz could easily take over that company. heck if skz grow old and start their own company, they'd probably do a great job at running it. PLEASE. i have issues on muting/notifications both mentally and in real life. sometimes, i just wish to disappear.

some people in my country are just disgusting tbh. not only racist but homophobic too. they label kpop as 'gay' and it DISGUSTS me. it's a problematic behavior/mindset people in my country need to fucking get rid of. anyway, HELP ME 6 MONTHS??? and i've been in this shit for like a decade eye. tbh, i’m not fond of kpop groups trying to appeal to the western audience :// it feels like they’re losing their identity in a way. yes recognition but at what cost? yg has my favorite groups but that’s one shitty company when it comes to promoting.

okay my ult! it’s haechan from nct but i consider chan an ult too. like a close second above my whopping list of kpop boys. oh yes! you should get the album just for like a keepsake? remembrance? how did mingi appeal to you? omg did you start getting interested in ateez back when he was still on hiatus? NOT YOU BIASING THE SAME PEOPLE I DID WHEN I FIRST STARTED STANNING. the infamous ateez thot-line. jongho is easily one of the best fourth gen vocalists out here, no one can change my mind :( good luck with memorizing the rest of enhypen! just in time for the comeback too. i hope i’ll get into kard soon but i’m pretty content (and a tad bit overwhelmed) with the amount of groups i stan right now.

please hold on though, feel free to vent here if you like. thanks for the offer tho HAHA but like i’ll try to get checked here too when the cases die down a bit. i’m sorry to hear about your condition though :( please don’t ever overwork yourself to the point that your joints/muscles would ache. it’s completely valid to complain about it tho. i get that you have others in mind but keeping that mindset really doesn’t do you (like you internally) any better? so if you need to, vent your frustrations out and don’t keep it in.

oh my god, about your performance last sunday. was the stage out in the open? glad you didn’t cough too much and did well on your concert. i’m proud of you! i can never understand dogs and poor birds T_T uni doesn’t have dances unfortunately. i think there’s just one party at the end like a graduation ball. what year are you in anyway? if it’s something that you’re fine with sharing. if not, it’s cool.

good luck with your exams! and thanks for the link! AHA what a cutie. i think he does this motivation thing once in a while during his lives and it’s just comforting. yeah joon and han my irl just freaked when we made that discovery. ult crumbs for her. oh god not me forgetting about every biases when you asked. you can ask for my biases in a few groups just list down the one’s you’re interested in knowing. 

i missed yesterday because i was grinding and finishing what if we stay + school work. finally did it today. i’m sure i’ll reply in like a day or two, definitely not a month unless i state otherwise. if i ever decide to abandon this blog, i’ll let you know.