#ik it’s been like a year and a half since I’ve been active here but I’m like ��. no where near the person I used to be lol

[haruchiyos]

In other news, I’m 3 weeks away from my first public screening as a filmmaker

[chuusheartattck]

THAT’S THAT ME ESPRESSO (TTME)

Chapter 13- Ik the law baby ☕️

(Warning: This chapter includes details of bullying. No violence but mentions of harassment)

Dread.

Dread was all you could feel at this very moment. You have met up with Yanfei and Heizou to film the video explaining your side. It was your story to be told so why were you so nervous?

You felt a warm hand touch your shoulder.

It was Yanfei.

“Don’t be so nervous Y/n. We’ll be here throughout everything.” She reassured you.

The three of you sat down at a table. You in the middle, Yanfei to your right, and Heizou to your left. All three of you discussed what to say and when. As you go on with your story, they will present the printed evidence to the camera.

The cameraman begins rolling.

You clear your throat and begin to talk, “Hello everyone. I’m Y/n L/n and I’ve been recently tangled up in some controversy regarding my days in school. I would like to make this video addressing all the allegations and clearing my name. I hope this video also sheds light on bullying in schools and helps someone know they’re not alone.”

Yanfei and Heizou flip through their papers for the first topic.

You talk again, “During my junior year I rejected someone named Dottore. I simply didn’t have time to date and because of it, he got upset. I have screenshots of when it first happened and how his friendgroup would begin to attack me online. This is all the evidence I have compiled throughout.”

Heizou held up DM’s from various people calling you fake and a liar.

“I was so confused on why his group would attack me like this as I never had an encounter with them in the first place. I only talked to Dottore on a few occasions. His friend group liked to call themselves The Fatui and the grade would eventually call them that too. I have no idea where the name originated from but they were extremely popular and basically were friends with everyone.” You add.

You pause for a moment as the memories of the torment they caused you start pouring in.

This didn’t stop you and you speak once again, “The harassment didn’t stop online. It continued during school. I have videos and audio recordings of them making gestures to me and yelling out profanities. They said they were trolling me, but is it really trolling if it goes on till we graduated?”

Yanfei begins to play an audio recording of voices from various people. Both the men and the women of the group making noises at you and yelling threats at you.

The audio recording stops.

“Anyways, that’s what I had to deal with my entire junior year. Now you may be asking, why didn’t nobody stop them? That’s the same question I asked myself the entire time. The group spread false rumors against me saying I slept with many people and how easy I am. I never had a boyfriend nor engaged in any sexual activity with anyone. However, everyone believed them and half the grade was against me. I had my friend’s support but everyone clowned anyone who was associated with me. It really felt like I had nobody.”

Heizou then holds up a series screenshots of a group chat that you were added to.

“Let’s move onto this group chat that I was added to by them. They used this group chat to tease and curse at me. If I were to leave or ignore them, they would add me back and harass me even more. One of the girls in the group, Columbina, would be the one to harass me in the group chat the most. Probably wanted to look good in front of the guys I don’t know.”

Yanfei then holds up papers of [redacted] individuals pleading with you to go tell the school.

“These are my friends who wanted to report the group to the school. Their names are redacted since I don’t want their information getting leaked. The reason why I didn’t report the group is because it would get much worse. Think about it, they would get suspended sure but what happens when they get out of suspension? They’re going to continue and possibly do worse things. If some of you are wondering if I ever stood up for myself. I did. I’m not going to let people walk all over me. However, just because I stand up for myself, doesn’t mean they’re going to stop. They would still continue.”

You take a sip of water before carrying on. You’ve been talking for so long you didn’t realize how dry your throat had became.

“The summer came around and I didn’t have to see them nor hear from them. However, they made sure that I knew they weren’t done with me. If I were to get invited to a party, they would make the host uninvite me or just tell people not to invite me at all. This affected me the most when they prevented me from going to my friend’s birthday party. I’m still upset about it to this day.”

Heizou holds up another series of screenshots of The Fatui threatening people to not invite you.

“Senior year came and the harassment died down a tiny bit. They would still tease me but I think they got tired of it by senior year as they had officially drained any spark I had left. They got what they wanted, the grade didn’t like me and I had a few friends left. I was so thankful to finally be able to graduate but it was short lived as they have now tried to ruin my career.”

You felt your throat close up again and you drink more water. It was never easy talking about your experiences, especially in front of a camera.

You continue again, “I have found out that the account was created by that group through investigations.”

Yanfei holds up the last document of Pantalone and Scaramouche’s conversation. The conversation where Pantalone admitted everything.

Scaramouche’s name is redacted for obvious reasons.

“The person who talked to Pantalone and the person who sent me these screenshots would like to remain anonymous. If you are both seeing this, I would like to give my upmost gratitude. You know who you are and I seriously can’t thank you enough.”

You then look straight into the camera, almost as if you were talking to The Fatui directly.

“To the group who made my high school experience a living hell, I hope you like the lawsuit coming to you in the mail. Have fun explaining to your parents why you’re getting charged with defamation and harassment.”

The video wraps up and it feels like you can finally breathe again.

A weight is lifted from your shoulders and you feel the best you have felt in a while.

The video gets posted shortly.

Masterlist II Previous II Next

A/N: Written chapter!! I wasn’t planning on making this written but I also wanted to make it detailed. The bully arc is finally done so now I can move onto the other things I planned 🥰

ALSOOO lmk if you guys want your users to be added to this au and i’ll make you a twitter user :)

Synopsis: You’re a new idol that just debuted under ‘Fontaine Entertainment’ with your new single ‘Espresso.’ You just graduated high school which means all your classmates are shocked to see you into stardom. Including your old situationship, who happens to be an actor.

Taglist: @skyoverkill1 @quacking-simp @lolmeowing @astro-stars @kaitfae @sl-vega @veekoko @scarawiki @yuminako @samyayaya @skyvella @kur0kki @practicoi @kukikoooo @scaraenthusiast1 @shutingstar @lloovvv @moonjellyfishie @miy-svz @xionri @lalalaloveallmydays @hearts4lizzzz @kathiwis @state-of-grac3 @morgyyyyyyy @scaradooche @theyluvkatt @meigalaxy @noirechomps @crimxeorcremexistspeacefully @vxcmx @ariesloves @cayl33n @animeobsessed56

[quick-catton]

Hi quick-catton!! First of all I love your page and I love your personality💕💕💕 I also LOVE Saturn and Felix and Oliver just-😫😫😫 I love it every time you post, it makes my day!! Right now I just really need your help. Today I had to go on another account just to send something to my ask box because since I started my account last year, I’ve gotten nothing and it really hurts.

I love how open and freaky you are in your posts and I’m honestly the same way with Saltburn and an anime fandom that I’ve shaped my blog around. I used to be a little calm and collected but you’re inspiring to just let go and let my freak flag fly but the problem is, with my fandom, I don’t think people are going to be very inviting. Like literally the only thing I wanna do right now is babygirl code my favorite anime character sooo badly but I’m afraid I’ll lose all my followers and when I try to I get no engagement.

Like I wrote three freaking paragraphs about how good he’d look with a navel piercing! That was this morning and I got nothing all day but four likes. No reblogs, no comments, I literally had to make another account and send myself some praise for that post just so I could post it to show people that at least someone else agrees with me.

And I know I should give it time but that’s the problem. Some of my other posts like that don’t grow. They just get five likes and that’s it and it sucks because all I wanna do is engage with people that want to see this boy in lingerie or a skirt or goddamn pregnant (told you I was a freak)

I just don’t know what to do. How do you deal that? I’m honestly this close to deleting my account coz it seems like I’m posting to a blank wall and it’s so embarrassing coz everyone can see it. Sorry this is so long! Thank you for quickcatton 💕💕

WAH ANON ur so sweet omg, thank you?? <33 honestly i feel like i don't have good advice because i only made a tumblr for the first time EVER at the beginning of january!!! i am 23 and had never set foot on this app, but i saw that most of the saltburn fandom was here, so i gave it a shot and i've just been learning as i go.

i think that's half of my 'luck' with having a good experience on this app, is that because this fandom is so fresh, it's super active, but it's also a very small fandom (relative to some others) so we're all kinda like a hivemind here LOL, and because of the source material of the movie itself being weird/freaky/psychosexual, we all know that anything goes and the more freaky the brainrot, the better! i'm in other fandoms where if i said half of the shit i say here, i'd be ostracized, so it's really a case by case basis unfortunately </3

ik i yap a lot here but i also hold back sooo much because even tho ik we're all weirdos here, i still get nervous about putting out my writing or not having people vibe with an idea– you're not alone in that, i promise. it helps forming friendships in your fandoms so you know that there'll always be people who you can get hype over ideas with, but i know that's easier said than done sometimes <3

i don't have advice on engagement because i honestly don't look at that stuff (which i know is so annoying to say lol but it's true); i made this account purely to have a place to dump brainrot/art etc and view other people's saltburn content and i didn't care about engagement, i just got lucky to meet some cool people and make close friends through it.

i think if people can tell you're having fun through your posts, they'll vibe with you! it does take time with the good ol' algorithm, i'm sure, but as long as your page brings YOU joy, that's what matters most. people don't have to agree with your takes, life is too short to be vanilla and water urself down for others :^) making fandom friends and gaining interactions will come along with being yourself, but if posting here and running the account feels more stressful to you than it is fun, it's okay to step away too!

if you're on ao3 and sites like that, leaving comments on your fave works can be a great way to get conversations going as well. i met my closest friend on here bc she stumbled across my fic on ao3 and then sent me a message; it was purely up to chance, but branching out and being brave starting conversations with your fave accounts can be a great way to feel more included in the fandoms you're in and maybe you'll meet cool people along the way!! <33

[affame-pour-etre-mince]

I just turned 21 and I’m at one of my all time lowest points in my life. I sit here and think about the fact that I’ve had an ed account on here since i was 14. Seven years of my life. And nothing has changed. My life has been so stagnant that it doesn’t even feel like any time has passed since then.

I sit, day in and day out, doing the same things, feeling the same way. Nothing changes, and nothing gets better for me, and I’m left to wonder why i’m even still trying, when everything feels so meaningless and i get joy out of absolutely nothing.

And I have no escape, i know I can’t ever kill myself, because i feel a personal responsibility for the emotional wellbeing of my family, especially since almost all of my close relatives have expressed to me in some capacity that they rely on me for their emotional stability and I’m their only source of emotional support.

I have to play therapist to everyone, and take everyone elses mental breakdowns in stride, but no one even cares enough to talk to me about anything i like or have an interest in, much less any problems i have, to the point of being actively ignored in some cases. And if I have an off day? If I’m not happy and catering to everyone else’s emotions?? Unforgivable when it comes to me.

And now i don’t have any secrets, my sh is constantly used against me, with half the people making jokes out of it and the other half throwing it in my face every chance they get, rubbing in how lll never be normal, and the physical evidence will always be there to remind me. I have no coping mechanisms left that don’t just bring up more pain

Except for this. Ik thats why my ed is rlly coming back again. I can control nothing about my life whatsoever, but i can control what i eat, how i look. And its appealing to think about how if i cant be normal in any capacity, at least i can be thin and play at being normal. At least i can leave the house and be given the base level kindness that I’m not afforded now because i’m not skinny. At least I’ll have this single one thing going for me, even if I have nothing else.

[yutaholic]

Jungwoo/Mark’s tweet earlier got me sooo mad I was heated again like so quick after the nj concert the very next day you’re like “back to koreaaaaa💚” like I’m upset bc i am into 2 other groups, all of which I’ve supported since their respective debuts (except for the fact that I’d been around and waited for neos since 2014 smrookies…since their fucking name sounded like a citation in a legal contract, SR14B! That’s right, all the way from Florida, I’ve been down for them since before THEY WERE EVEN “THEM”, THEIR DAMN SELVES!! I remember when Haechan spelled his birth name without a ‘c’ in it, you little muskrats, i— anyway ) but 80% of my attention time and money for the last few years has been to nct, including superm. First it was it was like 50-55%, then it progressed a couple years ago to 65-75, now here we are. To the point that I still care about my favs but all I talk about & most of I listen to & only I voted for, has been nct. On top of that, I’m Black. And was most active on Twitter. Do y’all know how hard it is to be a black ifan to these mfs for over half a decade, sometimes I wonder if im in my right mind cus part of me lookin in the mirror like “bitch u sure u good over there?🤨” 😭

The confidence…the gall, the audacity, the mf TEMERITY of these people to either not gaf enough about the majority of their fans that they’ll pussyfoot around and kiss the feet of Korean nctzens so much that they are actively disrespecting us. A few of them lurk, I know they do, esp Ty. ik cus he’s my bias & what he texts in bubble proves he knows things he wouldn’t be aware of without looking at our tweets. I am so upset with him & I have never been mad enough about anything he’s done as I am rn. If you’ve seen anything Tyongf have said, you know we are a little shocked and a lot disappointed. I’d planned to say sumn but that video showing he was insecure in his position came out so I used my allotted texts on that but the minute he sends smth (3 replies allowed per message of the artist) it’s ON, on.

I remember superhuman era quite well but what strikes me is how large the treatment gap has widened since then. There came to a time where we were lowered another peg (cus we knew we weren’t equal) to please and appease kfans. Then it’s gotten worse and worse when their fandom size jump quite a bit with Kick It but EXPONENTIALLY abroad with Sticker & favorite last year. But the acknowledgement has been less! How long does sm think we will sit & take this from them before we find another group that doesn’t mistreat their fans abroad lmao. One of those I’m into is BTS. Do you think I would’ve been calling radio stations regularly to get & then keep their songs on there, buying the albums in store to help with physicals and doing all the other projects if they treated intl army like NCT treats nctzens outside of Korea🧐?!?? Does NCT and sm think GRAMMY NOMINATIONS came to BTS twice by intl armys getting treated like second class citizens?! LMAOOO chile they have bumped their damn heads.

Atp I want Chris Lee and some other people’s heads on pikes!! Whoever make them type of decisions to shun us!! They really bending over backwards for people who tanked their entire era in anger bc American fans got fan service like taking pics with them on the street & shit?? That just shows how shallow they can be! Clown asses! Usually I’m like “Bubu don’t go on Twitter there aren’t good things there” but rn I’m sooo close to going off that it got me boutta text him to go on Twitter & exactly what to search if he wanna see whats really good in the fandom rn. I’m tired of being understanding & acting like I’m fine and is being the bigger person. I want to evoke emotions, I want them feel upset and worry and FEAR👹 It sounds unhinged and petty but I want them for even just a MINUTE, to have a bodily experience of fright and sadness and the realization that we very can leave in droves! But not boycotting an era and cursing them out, oh no, by legitimately just dropping them. That we CAN leave their asses silently and put another group on the map. We can drop not just the unit but the whole brand, ending that nct Hollywood bullshit RIGHT NOW if they don’t appreciate us being around. We don’t expect to be superior just at least toe the mf line??

It’s funny, they call us grass sometimes bc of our light sticks. I’m all about not feeling insecure or conflicted in the past but…These days? I’d thoroughly enjoy them having an “oh shit…” feeling of despair, and epiphany that if they don’t water ALL the “grass” in their yard, there WILL be noticeably large patches of nothing but dirt and dead plants.

I need you to know that I thoroughly enjoyed reading this ask. You have a way with words. I could feel the rage through my screen. I also felt like I was being scolded even though I did nothing wrong. You know how like when you're in the room and your friend is getting chewed tf out by their mom? That's how I felt for a hot minute lol

I said in an earlier ask that all this ncity discourse has me feeling like I'm on the couch with a bag of popcorn watching my bestie fight with her boyfriend. You are now that bestie and I will cheer you on while you read our men to filth. 👏 also hell yes kill nct hollywood early so we never gotta deal with that shit! hahahaha

[itsallyscorner]

Ik someone else already asked for like a delivery part (and honestly, that would be amazing. Like imagine the girls reacting to Baby Mix casually dropping it in their chat). But, also imagine Tom and Y/N haven’t released anything to the public and Perrie (my loose-lipped queen) let’s it spill over a virtual interview or something, how chaotic would that be????

Anyway, I truly loved your Baby Mix stories. You’re combining two of my favourite things so effortlessly. Thank you💜💜💜

Hello my love! So sorry for the long wait, I hope you don’t mind! Thank you for requesting this and being so patient with me❤️ I’m so glad you’re enjoying the Little Mix reader! stories🥰 I haven’t written a delivery part yet but I already had an idea of how I wanted to write this so...here ya go! Happy reading🤎🧸

💌.

Meet Aunty Pez

She would be the best aunty in the world, ugh🥺 Also I’m so sorry I haven’t been active, school has been keeping me busy, but hopefully it’ll ease up soon! Sending all my love to all of you💞

At 3:14am, on an early Monday morning, the bundle of joy that you and Tom have been waiting nine months for has finally arrived. After hours of enduring pain and labor, Amelia May Holland was born. Weighing at 7.5 lbs, she had the same bright chocolate colored eyes as her father, gorgeous brown hair, a mix of your and Tom’s nose, and thankfully she inherited your lips. She was a precious little thing, always cradled in the arms of either of her parents, since they both couldn’t believe she was finally in the real world with them.

The sun casted soft rays of light into the hospital room you and your little family occupied. The warm light added to the peaceful atmosphere you were all currently in. You were sat against the hospital bed, cradling Amelia in your arms, while you and Tom stared at her in fascination. You lean your head against Tom’s shoulder, eyes never leaving your baby girl, who’s nose momentarily scrunched up.

Softly chuckling, you glance at Tom, “Not even a day old and she’s already doing a habit of yours.” The gentle smile grows even wider on Tom’s lips, a sense of pride rushing through his veins.

“Well she’s definitely her father’s daughter.” He hums, his arm around your shoulder pulls you flush against his chest. Tom hides his face in the crook of your neck, placing feather light kisses onto your skin trailing down to your shoulder, where he rests his chin.

“I can’t believe we made her. Isn’t she the most gorgeous baby in the world?” He speaks in a hushed voice, cautious of startling his newborn daughter awake. He gazes at Amelia with a fond expression on his face, large fingers gingerly reaching out to softly stroke the back of his baby’s hand. She’s only been here a few hours and she’s already wrapped him around her dainty little fingers. He would go to extreme measures to do anything for her and to make sure she lived the best life she can. She was to be treated like a princess in his eyes; because she was his princess and you’ve been bumped up to be his queen.

“She’s all we’ve ever wanted.” You turn to face Tom over your shoulder. The whole morning, ever since you gave birth, the two of you spent most of the time admiring Amelia and would burst into tears at how proud you were of each other. Not only had you both just made the most precious baby in the world, but this was a new chapter in your lives. A new experience of life with a stronger bond, full of love, and years of memories that’ll be looked back on in the future.

Tom shifts his gaze to you, the look in his eyes changing to adoration. He tenderly kisses your lips, repeating the actions a few more times before speaking. “Thank you so much for this. Thank you for being an amazing wife and giving me a family. I love you so, so, so, so, much. You have no idea.” He brushes his nose against yours, shutting his eyes, to savor the meaningful moment.

“I wouldn’t be doing this with anyone else but you. You’re gonna be such an amazing dad.” You beam at him. Tom softly chuckles, leaning his forehead against your temple, “God, I hope.”

“You will, you’ll be the best one in her eyes. I already know it.” You reassure him, pecking the corner of his mouth. You turn your attention back to Amelia, who was still sleeping peacefully in your arms.

“So when should we tell everyone?” Tom asks, resting his chin on your shoulder again. You lean the back of your head against his shoulder, making yourself comfortable in his arms.

“I think we should tell our family and friends first. I’m not ready to share her to the public yet, I want her to only be ours for now.” You quietly explain. You feel Tom smile against your skin.

“Of course, darling. Whatever you’re most comfortable with, that’s what we’ll go with.”

(Y/n)🌻: sent a photo

We thought Amelia might want to pop in and say hello to her favorite aunties for the first time!❤️

Perrie🦋: oh my goodness! Congratulations🥳🥳 I’m over the moon for the both of you!!

Oh she’s precious! Look at those cheeks!! I can’t wait to meet her🥺

Jade💜: OMG WE SHARE THE SAME NAME!!

I’m so happy for you and Tom!! You guys are going to be the most amazing parents in the world!❤️

Leigh-Anne😻: Baby Amelia, you are the most adorable baby I’ve ever seen!!!😍 Babe, you and Tom have some really good genes👀

Congrats you two!! I’m so proud of you both❤️❤️❤️

Jesy💖: Thank god Amelia got (y/n)’s genes for her lips!!😂😂 I can’t imagine another loose-lipped Holland!

I’m so happy for you guys!! I can’t believe you’re already a mum, darling🥺 We love you so much and can’t wait to see you and Baby Amelia❤️

(Y/n)🌻: You guys🥺🥺 I can’t wait to see you all and get out of this hospital! This bed isn’t doing anything for my back😭

Perrie🦋: You must be so exhausted lovey, how are you doing? I hope everything went well during delivery!

(Y/n)🌻: Very painful, I felt like I was about to pass out omg😭 The doctor kept on telling me to push, I didn’t know if I was shitting myself or pushing the baby out😭

Tom’s been amazing the entire time. Bless him, I think I broke his hand while I was pushing :(

Jesy💖: Omg!! What was Tom’s reaction to childbirth?!!

(Y/n)🌻: If you thought he couldn’t get even paler, you thought wrong! He was as white as the walls in the room😭😭 He was a good sport through it all though!

Also, Amelia’s crying. I’ve got to go, I’ll talk to you girls soon!! And good luck with the interview today, you guys are gonna smash it xx

Perrie🦋: Don’t worry about us! You’re officially on maternity leave now! We’ll send your regards for the interviewer❤️

Leigh-Anne😻: Look at our baby mama! We love you❤️❤️❤️

Jade💜: Say hello to baby Amelia and that Aunty Jade loves her🥰

Jesy💖: ^Kiss ass, she’s not even a day old and the competition for best Aunty has already begun smh.

Bye darling, we’ll catch up with you soon❤️

You smiled at your screen before turning it off and placing it onto the table beside your bed. Tom was pacing the room, cradling Amelia against his chest. He was gently rocking her back and forth, alternating from shushing her to humming some sort of tune underneath his breath. You sat back and admired the curly headed boy that’s claimed your heart. Not only was he the love of your life but he was also the father of your child. Sure you guys were young, both in your late 20s, but the daddy role definitely fit Tom perfectly.

Tom must’ve felt your stare because he turned around and sent you a tired smile. He walked towards your bed and motioned for you to lay down. Using one had to cradle Amelia, he used the other to help you get comfy in the hospital bed. Still with one hand, he fixed your hair on the pillow so that it was away from your face. His large calloused hand cradled your jaw, “Get some sleep, darling. I know how tired you are.”

You pouted at him, “But what about Amelia?” He shook his head, his thumb stroking your cheek, “Don’t worry about it, I’ll try and get her to sleep. You just close your pretty eyes and get some rest in.”

“What if she’s hungry?”

“If she doesn’t fall asleep, then I’ll wake you up. Just please get some sleep, love. You haven’t taken a proper nap since this morning and I know you’re already close to knocking out.” He reasoned with pleading eyes. You sigh finally giving in, lazily nodding in response. Tom beams at you and leans down to place a tender kiss onto your lips.

“I love you both.” You mumble against his lips. He pecks your lips once more, “And we love you too, mummy.” The moment you closed your eyes, you were out like a light.

You managed to take a nap for about half an hour until you felt a few pats on your shoulder. You were immediately awake, turning your head to look for Amelia. You looked at the hospital bassinet, where you could see her sleeping peacefully.

“What’s wrong?” You ask Tom. He was sat beside your bed with his phone held in his hand watching something.

“I’m so sorry for waking you, but you should see this.” He apologized with a pitiful smile. He scoots closer to the bed so you can look at the screen. Your brows furrow together in question as you stare at Tom; it was the girls’ interview.

“Just watch.”

“Hello ladies! Thank you for joining me today!” The interviewer started. A round of “hellos” and waves were seen on the recorded Zoom session.

“Thank you for having us!” Leigh-Anne said.

“Yeah, it’s always a pleasure to be on your show, Zach.” Jade gushed. Zach made a show of flattery making them all laugh.

“I mean I guess I should start by asking how are all of you?”

Jesy was the first to answer, “I’d say we’re all doing pretty good, aren’t we girls? You know—just trying to get by especially with all that’s going on in the world.”

Perrie agreed, “Yeah, we’re lucky enough to be healthy and have the privilege to work. So I’d say we’re very blessed and making the best out of situation.”

“That’s great for you girls. AND speaking of making the best of the situation, thank you for giving us entertainment! I’ve been watching The Search and I’m absolutely obsessed.” Zach began, complimenting the show. He continued, “Although I did notice, that there’s only four of you at the moment, and in the show. How is it like to not have (y/n) around?”

Jesy pouted, the other girls having familiar reactions at the lack of your presence.

“As much as we miss her, it’s best for her and the baby to stay home and away from the public. When it comes to your career or family; family comes first, so it was totally understandable.” Jesy explained.

Jade chirped in, “Well, she’s not completely missing out. She’s had a few virtual appearances on the show and we’ve all been in contact, we always know what she’s up to.”

“How’s she doing? With the baby preparations and all?” Zach asked the girls. Their faces immediately brightened with joy, especially Perrie how squealed and clapped her hands in delight.

“Oh she’s doing wonderful, we were just texting her! She’s officially on maternity leave!” Perrie cheered. On the screen, Jesy eyed Perrie warily.

“Officially on maternity leave?”

Perrie smiled widely, “Yes, she is! She sent us a photo of the baby in our group chat and my goodness! Their baby is so cute, I just want to pinch her little cheeks!”

The three other girls’ eyes widened at the things coming out of Perrie’s mouth too stunned to say anything.

Zach squinted at Perrie, “Wait she’s already had the baby?”

“PERRIE!”

“Yeah, today actually.” The blonde answered proudly.

“PERRIE SHUT UP!”

“STOP TALKING!”

Perrie stopped, looking at the three girls offendedly, “What?”

“Oh my god, she did not.” Leigh-Anne facepalmed herself. Jade’s jaw was slack and Jesy’s eyes were wide with horror.

“Babe, do you know what you just did?” Jesy questioned Perrie, fingers pinching the bridge of her nose in stress.

You paused the video, taking in what just happened.

Tom eyed you carefully, “Your phone’s been blowing up consistently. Pez even called me to apologize, she feels really bad (y/n).”

You frowned knowing that Perrie was most likely upset at herself. You’ve been friends with Perrie for years now. It was common knowledge amongst you and the girls that if something big and secretive were to happen, you were to never tell Perrie. Not that you all wanted to leave her out on propose, she just didn’t know how to keep her mouth shut. When Perrie found things that made her happy or excited, she didn’t know how to contain her happiness. So it wasn’t completely a surprise to learn she’s told the world you and Tom were finally parents.

Tom noticed that you were still quiet, “Are you mad, darling?”

You shook your head, “No—no, I’m not mad at her. I know Perrie can get too excited sometimes.”

“So you’re okay with this?” Tom asked you, knowing that just an hour ago you said you wanted to keep Amelia away from the public. His hand reaches for yours, grasping it.

You tilted your head at the ceiling, “Yeah, I guess I am? I mean it’s not like she said Amelia’s name or anything. All she told them was that I gave birth already.” You paused and turned to look at Tom.

“Plus, I think she’s saved us the trouble of figuring out how to tell the world about Amelia.” You send him a smile. He reciprocates the action and brings your hand up to his lips, pressing a kiss to the back of it. “We don’t have to tell them anything more. All they have to know is that you’ve given birth and our little princess is healthy. Also that we’re very happy. The rest of the details will only be for us. For now.”

“For now.” You confirmed squeezing his hand. You glanced at your phone and motioned for Tom to give it to you. Scrolling through your contacts you clicked on Perrie’s name, “I guess we should call her and thank her.”

You clicked on the FaceTime icon and not even a second later, Perrie immediately answered the call.

“I am so sorry.” She apologized, hand covering her face. You chuckle at her and shake your head, “We’re actually calling you to thank you Pez.”

Her face contorts into confusion, “What do you mean thank me? I just exposed the two of you during a live interview.”

Tom poked his head into frame, “Well one, you’ve announced that Amelia’s here already, so that’s one thing off our list. And two, you just saved me months worth of relief during interviews. Now that everyone knows we have a baby, I don’t need to be scared of accidentally slipping it out when I have to do promos!”

The blonde looked between both you and Tom I’m disbelief, “Are you kidding me? If I knew you two would’ve responded this way I wouldn’t have been spending the last hour beating myself up for it.”

You laughed smiling at her. Perrie beamed at the both of you, “For just delivering a baby, you look gorgeous hun. You’re glowing.”

“Aw thank you, lovey.” You look at Amelia from the corner of your eye. “Do you wanna see her?” Perrie eagerly nods at the camera. Tom takes the camera and rounds your bed to the bassinet. Aiming the camera above Amelia he said, “Amelia, meet Aunty Pez.”

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[dark-muse-iris]

Pre-dystopian era truly encapsulates pre 2020 now doesn't it? 😂 The things the last 2 almost 3 years have brought forth in humanity is 👀 disappointing at the best of times.

I'm surprised to see just how the app has changed, as I haven't had the chance to hop on desktop just yet. It seems...almost functioning? No more character limit on asks is nice as now I don't have to break this into 6 different messages 😂 New settings and everything else to try and figure out.

I've turned 24 this last July, and the last time I was truly active on here I was 21 so the personal growth and loss that have come with that is interesting for sure. I've lost both my grandmas in the past year and my living grandfather has already remarried (oh boy the family drama that caused), moved twice and live with my boyfriend of 3 years, have gone NC with his narc family and LC with mine as best as possible, started a job that has me earning the most I ever have financially but definitely have cost a part of my soul 💀😂 and I'm trying my best to get to a place in my life where I'm debt free and in a industry I actually love and care for (cannabis and growing it) and get my boyfriend the disability coverage he needs but I'm sure you're well aware that its a poor joke of trying to get that approved. So on some notes, its been good and I've changed into a better person but also if anything bad happens in 2023 I'm very fragile about it 😂😅

I understand the "striving for mediocrety" as a workplace mentality, and just how exhausting it can feel with wanting to bring better things to the office and just getting shot down. The old dodgers of "this is how we've always done it" dont always seem to realize that doing the same thing for 40+ years only works when the system isn't as broken as it is (or if it even worked in the first place). Is being remote going to give you the chances to take care of your sleep issues and anything else health related thats popped up for you? Ik last I checked you were doing the testing to see if it was more than standard narcolepsy.

(I'll probably message again and finish my thoughts but I am night shift and my break just ended so I gotta head back. It's so nice talking to you again ☺️💕)

I’m sorry to hear about your grandmas. I lost two of mine since 2020 and it’s been really hard on the family. If my grandfather had remarried that quickly, I’d be scratching my head as to how they were able to make it happen. My grandfather doesn’t appear to be dating, but that’s likely because 1) he cooks, and 2) he’s got stage 4 cancer, courtesy of U.S. chemical warfare in Vietnam.

As someone who works in a soul-sucking job that pays well, let me just say: it’s worth it. It is absolutely worth it to have a full belly and warm place to sleep during recession years. When I worked in industries I loved and didn’t have enough to eat, I resented my dreams and hated myself for having them. Letting those dreams go gave me the chance to have other dreams and I’ve been able to forgive myself for being so hard in my early 20s. It can take years to get the life you want, so don’t let anyone shit on you for doing what you have to do to eat in the meantime, especially anyone of the older generations who did their part to suppress our standard of living.

The insistence on clinging to broken systems of the past is one big reason I transferred jobs. There’s a lot of that still going around. My managers were panicking and kept asking why I was leaving; I think they finally understood how far I’m willing to go to make sure “office culture” won’t waste my time anymore. For me, being a remote employee streamlines my workflow and reduces my workplace accommodations for narcolepsy by half. It’s also much easier to manage my ADHD at home where I can remove distractions. In the office, no one was working on our job shit; everyone just gathered around to talk about their kids or health problems or ridiculous work drama they didn’t plan on fixing themselves. I had forgotten how much time people wasted just bitching for nothing. When I hear a complaint, I want to fix the problem and get rid of it, but that wasn’t a good fit. My colleagues wanted free therapy from someone their kid’s age because *surprise* their kid isn’t talking to them anymore.

I’m hopeful for cannabis and glad you’re pursuing the field! It’s not fully legal where I live, but I have many chronically ill family and friends who rely on it because they can’t take meds or afford the healthcare they need. I have some family who are growers in different states where it’s allowed and they’re happy with the work they’re doing. I never had the green thumb for that; I’m the only who would take dead grass and make a basket out of it.

[priffi]

hi all!! it’s been a rough year for everyone, and i just wanted to shout out my mutuals for being here for me, esp since i joined around mid april. i’m not apologizing for @ing u, u can thank me later ;)) so, in no specific order, are my shoutouts:

@futuremoviemaker92 for being my first mutual. i loved ur blog + content, esp when i didn’t even have an acct yet ksdjfsfjks and ik we never talked much but ily <3

@beccabeans ur art is amazing !! that redraw...and the sidewalk chalk... i can’t draw and i wish i had ur skill :yearning: and we share a name :))

@creampuffqueen hail the queen of angst with fluffy endings, mal!!! ur writing...u write so much...i can never write as much as u

@mittenss caspian...hi....did u ever watch ml??? u r crazy. bonkers. using a bot to select ur pronouns. everyone go follow neon. rn. remember ur crazy fridge keysmash nickname. yah that him

@janisarkisian we may have a rivalry in levels in wlwrenegades w mee6 but ur writing is top notch!!! ur triko + group chat fic *chef’s kiss*

@phobidawg ik u can’t b online as much but THAT TRIKO FIC OF URS....THE FLUFF......AND THE PINING,,,U HAVE DONE BAD UPON THE WORLD BUT I CAN MAKE AN EXCEPTION W UR WRITING

@cerenoya sunshine bby. everyone follow her. ur the sweetest person i know, and ur always so supportive, and i was so sad when u said u would take a break but then u came back !!! and ur hcs and ur edits....don’t stop being u ilysm <3

@alirasenn renn!! ur quality atla content...yes (and u have proved zuko seeing shrimp colors canon too....iconic)

@nobellrenaissance mar. we became moots after a grand reveal in dms. remember that?? i was so insistent and u were too and so i had to reveal and then u revealed and then u had that EPIC STRATEGY w tuser eardrian (i think) but ur writing too....gosh i love my moots

@honey-harper-official :sob: i was so sad when u told us u were going to deac, and then i was glad u chose to pass it on, and i’m sad ur going, but i support u!!! ur mental health is important. ur wlw fics and mmitm and the evander hate au,,,,u have the best ideas and i will miss u!!!!!!

@devils-on-a-stereo duskie hi ily is there much else to say (ur art.... u r one of the few active artists for renegades and for that everyone is required to follow u)

@wehiddendesires we r only eah moots and. we never talk but. ily and i c u in my notifs and think: “omg hi!!! we don’t talk but this is talking!!!” also ur edits are :hearteyes: u always have the best images and the ocs too...

@lavenderbloo ren!!! we haven’t been moots for long but ur writing i love and adore <33

@yadrieljulian sdjkfslkdfjs the way i’ve blocked u b4 and u’ve blocked me b4 too... that coññection >:3 ur fics,,, the angst and fluff,,, and ur nobell too,,, and ur art,,, and ur edits,,, u do it all

@cindersnightmare mads.....ur art......... :scream: ILYSM!!! GO CHECK OUT HER ART!!! LOOK AT IT!!!! that triko art is *screams*

@honey-hippie-harper dawnie !! hcttr...i can never write that much. u show so much love to everyone, and ily, and i’m so sad abt ur fics but ofc ur mental health is important!!!

@maya-livingstone kin!! u go girl!! we may have had a past rivalry over levels in mee6 but that is in the past. ur novissabell edit....that’s all that is needed to be said

@darkalinas u write nonstop. bowboy and banguage creator. bowboy like me... anw ily (everyone check out his edits!!)

@thepurpledragon4444 god like at that half of michot. that purple dragon girl with numbers at the end who can’t change her url legally. yeah she gon’ end up in hell one day (but then again she came from there) burn in hell. idiot (romantic)

@winterrhayle look at the printer colors flag girl whose brain is taken over by winlet. yeah she my friend. that wlw brain ain’t ever going to stop radiating sunshine and gay

@kilioferebor ashley.....THAT TRIKO EDIT OMG ILYSM AND I CANNOT BELIEVE I WASNT FOLLOWING U EARLIER AND NOW EVERYONE IS LEGALLY REQUIRED TO REBLOG HER TRIKO EDIT OR THEY WILL FACE A LAWSUIT :knife: STILL NOT OVER IT AS U CAN TELL BUT HEY I’M NOT COMPLAINING

@lightsxwings SIMI I WAS SO SAD WHEN U DEAC but then u came back :))

@caimontagovs look at this moot he don’t know nothing except for the fact they’re trapped in this spiral towards hell known as the rcsfu

@30029061s we never talked. but u have cool content. another astronomy lover !!

@atlanteias hi ur new to tumblr bc u don’t have many posts but ur edits are p cool so far!! i cannot wait to c what else u’ll make!!!

and that concludes the list!! if i forgot u i’m sorry but ily!! hope to c everyone in the new year :))

[peaceoutofthepieces]

hiiii ik u might feel a little discouraged abt writing the prince!jens fic but i do hope u know there are readers out there who love ur work regardless of what u think. we can be our biggest critics and i think we forget that these fics are meant to be fun and enjoyed, reader or author!

sometimes i get discouraged to write abt vds as well just because i got into the fandom much later and when the hype was gone so i feel like there’s nobody who care anymore but i like to remember that 1. one reader to me is enough- it means someone out there has taken their time to read my work and that makes me happy and 2. somewhere along the line someone may find ur fics and get so excited abt all the content they can indulge (even if time has passed from the initial hype)

anyway lol sorry for the long tangent of this ramble but i hope u know there are people who love ur writing and are excited for anything u put out (as long as it continues to make u happy ofc!!) i cant wait to see where the prince!jens fic goes if u choose to continue to write it :)

I am most definitely very self-critical and I tend to stress about everything very easily, and then I always let that take away from writing these things for my own enjoyment in the first place, you’re absolutely right. I’ve loved this idea for a year and a half and I’ve not once stopped caring about it :’)

and yeah, I think that’s a big part of my problem for the opposite reason! I’ve been here since close to the beginning when vds was much bigger thing in the fandom but still something quite niche, and I loved it so much for that reason. a lot of people have told me over that time that I introduced them to vds, and it’s true that if we’re still creating content we still could find more! (I also want you to know I kinda love that you joined when you did, because you brought so much more content in such a slump. I have so many of your fics open that I still have to read—they’d be perfect motivation right about now actually, so I’ll have to get through them, and I am very excited)

thank you so much for this!! it’s really nice to know that I have people like you reading it now even though you weren’t around when I was more active with it 🙈 I’m absolutely planning to finish it (I’d never forgive myself otherwise), I’m just having a bit of doubt about it atm, but the lovely messages from you all have helped a lot, so thank you thank you ❤️

[lesbeet]

how have you learned more about prose? i’ve mostly written poetry but i’m falling into prose poetry, creative nonfiction, and fiction a lot more now

another anon sent this:

“hey! i know this is a pretty big question so no pressure to respond ofc but ive been trying to get better at editing, especially with nanowrimo this year, and seeing you talk about it with LE's book, i was just wondering if you had any tips for strengthening your editing? thanks either way”

so i’m just gonna answer them together if that’s cool!

-

i have several books i’m gonna recommend first, and if you can access them i would absolutely suggest starting there:

first is the anatomy of story by john truby (here’s a pdf copy, but i would recommend a hard copy if possible, mostly for formatting reasons). this is much less about writing prose and much more about....well, the anatomy of a story. i’m not exaggerating when i say this book completely revolutionized the way i look at storytelling and macro-level story organization. i’ve always been able to hold my own when it came to making a sentence sound nice, but for a long time i had very little concept of story mechanics from a writer’s perspective, rather than from a reader’s perspective—you need both to write a good story. i could honestly wax poetic about this book all day so i’ll move on for now, but for real if you want more info just ask bc i’d love to discuss it further

next is the first five pages: a writer’s guide to staying out of the rejection pile by noah lukeman. unfortunately i don’t have a digital copy to link, but i’m pretty sure i found this one at half-price books for a very reasonable price. i would say i knew about half of what this book had to offer prior to reading, but what i learned from the rest has been incredibly helpful with my prose writing ever since. some of it was just that it was my first exposure to seeing someone explicitly write out certain concepts (for example, there’s a whole bit on adverbs that goes far beyond stephen king’s useless “i believe the road to hell is paved with adverbs” quote that doesn’t actually explain WHY they’re largely ineffective, and i’ve cut down my use of them dramatically since then. not here obviously slkfjksjsd but in my actual writing that i go back and edit), but i read through it again sometime early on during quarantine and i still highly recommend it. there are some fantastic examples he uses to demonstrate his points, and there are also writing/editing exercises at the end of each chapter that are pretty great

the last book i’ll recommend is self-editing for fiction writers: how to edit yourself into print by renni brown and dave king (again i don’t have a digital copy but i either read it through my library or through scribd, bc i remember reading it on my phone and screenshotting a whole bunch of stuff). i think i actually wrote some posts a while back when i was reading this one; i’ve only read it once so i don’t know it as well as the first two books i recommended, but i remember being impressed with it because it touched on concepts that i really hadn’t seen elsewhere, even after spending hours upon hours combing through writing advice blogs/websites that mostly recycled the same handful of truisms. if i’m remembering correctly, this one also has some great exercises to try out

-

as far as prose writing, i think the most helpful tip i can give you (aside from “use every word you read as a learning experience”) is to remember that above all, writing is communication. every single word you use or omit carries its own denotations and connotations, and context is everything. analyze and over-analyze both your own work and the work of others until you find that you're able to recognize and understand why certain things were written the way they were written (particularly for something like a novel or even an advertisement, where the words have been heavily edited, rather than like. an email or something). what was the writer attempting to communicate or achieve? were they successful? what worked effectively? what didn't, and how might it have been changed to make it more effective? most importantly, how do you know these things? (in other words, it's not enough to be able to identify what needs changing, or even what the/a solution would be. you need to know WHY it needs changing, and why those possible changes make it more effective. i try to do this for my clients when editing; i've found that explaining my suggestions/changes results in far less pushback than when they think i just changed it bc i didn't like how it sounded originally or something lol). knowing the intention of a piece of writing is also crucial--sometimes a sentence that works perfectly in one context would be nonsensical in another.

but in addition to analyzing for effectiveness, analyze for taste! make note of certain writers or books or sentences or lines of poetry that stand out to you, either because you hate them or because you love them (the latter is more useful imo). you'll probably start to see patterns. try to figure out what it is about that prose that you find so compelling. is it vivid imagery? unique uses of figurative language? starkness and clarity? (those are some of mine; your own preferences may vary.) chances are that once you've begun to develop your own unique voice as a writer, these qualities that you admire will show up, with your own personal flavor, in your writing. likewise, once you can identify exactly what it is in someone else's writing that doesn't work for you, the better you'll be able to avoid it in your own writing.

above all, practice. practice active reading, practice analyzing, practice writing, practice analyzing your own writing.

-

ik some of that is vague advice, but it seemed like you were asking how to learn, rather than for specific tips. i can share some of those too if you'd like, just shoot me another ask :)

most of what's here is applicable to both asks, about editing and about prose writing in particular. structure is a whole separate beast (but is definitely relevant to learning how to be a better editor) but i'd be happy to discuss that further as well.

i really hope this is helpful! i'm always always open to answer more questions :)

[batmanisagatewaydrug]

Hi feel free not to answer because ik ppl can find it gross but my discharge has recently become yellowish and very frequent. I got tested and went to the doctor and they said it was just a hormone imbalance but it’s massively affected my self confidence. I’m meeting up with someone for the first time since March in a couple weeks and I just wondered if u had any tips on how not to feel so awkward about it?? Thank you, hope your doing good x

hi anon,

I’m not sure you realize what a big ask you’ve sent me here - self esteem is a tricky beast, and instilling it in another person I’ve never even met is a tall order.

the best thing I can do is present you with some facts. I would assume that when you say you’re “meeting up” with this person you mean the two of you will be getting up to something of a sexy nature, or else the discharge wouldn’t have much to do with anything - unless your discharge is weighing on you so heavily that it’s impacting all of your social interactions, in which case my heart goes out to you! if that’s the case, I implore you to remember that what you’re experiencing is a bodily cycle as natural as sweating or digestion, the vast majority of people will never know a thing about it, and anyone who uses it as a basis upon which to judge you is, frankly, a clown. 

I want you to imagine how much you would care if you found out that one of your colleagues or acquaintances had slightly more frequent and more yellow discharge than the average person, and then apply it to yourself. dear anon, people are remarkably good at not giving a shit about things that don’t directly impact them. 

now, about this person you’re meeting up with who may be getting a bit more up close and personal with your genitals than the average friend. listen, I shan’t sugarcoat this: they may find your new abundance of discharge changes the sensory experience of whatever it is you two like to do together in a way that doesn’t float their boat. maybe you’ll need to renegotiate how you do some things. maybe some stuff will be off the table that wasn’t before. or maybe they won’t notice at all. the only way to find out is to try.

if it feels germane, by all means initiate a discussion with them prior to the actual meeting up, or prior to the actual genital-based activities, or at whatever point feels appropriate. “hey,” you might say, “just a heads up, I am very excited to see you for the first time since March, but here is a new development that has become relevant since that time that I want you to know about.” letting someone know in advance about a source of insecurity never hurts, no?

I could say something about how it’s been a long five months and they’re unlikely to care about a little extra discharge, but it would be wrong to pretend that people should lower their sexual standards just because it’s been awhile since they’ve done the do. (your friendly local sex witch hasn’t had sex in a year and a half, and my standards are creeping higher by the day.) maybe your person won’t be into it, and that will suck! but it’s also something I implore you not to internalize if it does happen; you are not to blame for the ways other people react to your body.

however, I will say that most people who are familiar with sex and the having thereof are generally that the process is a messy one. things get wet (unless, I suppose, you’re Ben Shapiro’s uniquely unfortunate wife), there are a lot of unusual smells, if we’re being honest not everything is going to taste good. and all of that’s fine, and perfectly normal, and a small hazard that most people are willingly signing up for when they decide to do the do. anyone who can’t handle that probably has a bit of maturing to do before they’re prepared to be anybody’s sexual partner.

anyway, I cannot magically instill self esteem in you (god, I wish) but I hope some of this was somewhat helpful?

[slumberinglabyrinth]

a while back i did a review of the prison chapter in por and it was totally overblown and whatever but i kinda wanna do that again for (what remains of) radiant dawn so i guess i will

I'll be doing them in batches since this got long. In this post: 3-5 through 3-9

3-5: it's been two years and i forget why we have to defend this castle

this was a pretty alright map. the reinforcements were annoying but that's because I generally don't actually turtle all that much on defend chapters and as a result I was Right There whenever and wherever they showed up. I tried to grab the energy drop off the boss but the dude ran away from Heather the moment I created an opening and I didn’t want to reset so :^/

I moved provoke off of shinon and onto Brom for this and its... probably way too strong? like it wasn't a 100% draw rate but there were several turns in a row where he was the only person being attacked which is. insane. and also super fun lmao. I think it's a shame that the hostility mechanics in fe aren't as well documented; on some level it ruins the magic, but in cases like this where you're actively influencing it i think it'd be useful to know to what degree you're actually influencing it

disarm + steal is also a really neat/fun idea that would be a great way to counteract how i apparently will never have any money for weapons while playing as the greilgallia party crew 😔 (not to be confused with the greilgallia polycule, which disbanded around twenty years earlier) but I can also never get disarm to proc and half the things that i was able to get unequipped were too heavy for Heather to actually steal 😔

all around a decent map to ease myself back into playing rd with. I certainly could have played better, but defend maps tend to be easier and I appreciated that here

3-6: dawn brigade returns and promptly sinks into a swamp

god this map sucked. it's really hard to pick where to start with it but while i get that lore dictates that they need to only be fighting laguz right here it was probably the wrong gameplay decision with everything else that was going on. I think maybe making tigers have ~4 less str across the board would have been a nice start since I kinda needed to either never get hit by them at all or to kill them first.

several chapters later I’m also realizing maybe i should have like. started to use bexp lol

fighting laguz is also really weird in terms of like... because they have boosted stats while transformed so you can either kill them while they're untransformed (which is fairly easy but since they don't attack, you have to kill them during player phase which means one per turn per unit), deal chip damage (or none at all) to burn down their gauge so you can actually kill them, or try to power through their boosted stats and hope you don’t die in the process.

Because I hadn't used bexp and almost all my units were super weak, I mostly had to rely on the eff against beasts knife that you can buy in the bargain shop this chapter and also volug, who had enough def (even with halfshift) to not die in one round. Honorable mentions go to noland (a fitting name for this map), jill (with canto!), and zihark, who were able to help pick off untransformed laguz, and to micaiah, who could deal magic damage and actually damage transformed laguz.

this was also the first dawn brigade map! i know lots of people people dont like their maps after act 1 and while i was trying to go into this one with an open mind... yeah, they totally got shafted by this map design. it's not really their fault but this map sucked hard. I know that they generally did one of each class variant (fire mage, wind mage, etc.) and not have duplicates but I think that the dawn brigade would have benefited from another mage of some kind if only so you could have someone who could deal with all these goddamned cats

also bk shows up but since he's not a bonus unit i didn't want to feed him kills so i didnt really use him. maybe that was a mistake. also why couldn't he like. warp someone that wasn't the furthest away from the action.

3-7: hey so we heard you liked the previous map

Zihark is there? fuck this i'm reverting to a previous save and unrecruiting him

3-6: i forgot to mention that this map was a swamp map and also had darkness

I know I've mentioned that the similar map in fe6 (desert+fog) was actually kinda alright but this one isnt that at all. Playing through it a second time helped because i knew where enemies were spawning, but it was still more annoying than fun.

Swamps commit the cardinal sin of forcing everyone that can't fly (in this case: everyone but jill) to suffer massive terrain penalties. Deserts at least let mages move a little bit further (which admittedly wouldn't help much here since it's only micaiah and laura), but here everyone friend and foe alike (except Jill) moves slowly and it makes gameplay just grind to a halt which is never, ever fun level design.

Also Fiona just. could not move beyond the starting island. she couldn't even wade a little bit into the swamp like i did with ed and leo to attack at range and get laguz to untransform. they let you deploy everyone but it genuinely felt like i wasn't handed the tools to succeed at this map. always a great goal to have when designing a game

I don't know how to improve this map. unrecruiting zihark (by flying him up to the northeast with jill and having him talk to mordy/lethe) wasn't particularly difficult (battle saves make it easy enough to scout out where they were, and it's not like i'd ever feel bad about 'cheating' on this map) but... would a greater field of view actually help? would making it not a swamp actually help? would giving you more allied units that'll throw themselves in the face of danger with no regard for their own lives actually help?

I don't know.

3-7: but for real this time

Back to ikequest!

this map is... literally the same map as the previous one, but with a different map objective. and larger. and backwards. and not at night.

it's still a swamp.

Luckily, it's a survive map, and the vast majority of the enemy force does not have the time to actually reach you if you hide up in the corner.

Which is exactly what i did.

Here's the list of the optional units (ike and ranulf are mandatory, which sucks because i don't like using twinks cat laguz and ike's plot promotion feels miles away) I deployed and why I deployed them

Haar: to fly out and recruit Jill

Gatrie: to be carried by Haar and specifically to bait the single thunder mage in Haar's way (and help Haar clean out that area so Jill can be safely recruited). I gave him corrosion two maps ago and it actually fully disarmed a guy on this map! 🎊

Brom: stand near where the swamp ends and draw the handful of enemies that actually make it all the way there away from ike and ranulf and ulki and jaffar (who are auto-recruits in this chapter).

This map is. so incredibly easy to both beat and complete the (meaningful) optional objectives on. I missed a conversation between Ike and Micaiah (which requires you to travel all the way across the map that i just finished saying takes forever to traverse and do it in 12 turns), but as long as you unrecruit Zihark on the previous map (he's.... right in the middle of the main force so good luck if you don't) you can probably do this map first try with no deaths even if you haven't trained haargatriebrom At All

I think that kinda underscores a problem that intsys had with rd which was... it feels like they didn't really have a lot of time to fine-tune stuff? like you're going from the hardest (or at least most unpleasant) map to the easiest one this side of the tutorial and it just. doesn't feel good? like there's going to be some inherent difficulty in balancing a difficulty curve when you're shifting from party to party but. this was bad. really bad.

Also a side observation but it does actually say who units can talk to in battle prep which is pretty useful thing to have! you need to shift the stat spreadsheet allllll the way over, but it's there!

i promptly forgot about it by the time 3-10 came around and was like "hey i should just. have ike run up to elincia, see if they'll talk, and then reset" though lol

3-8: Less-than-Lethal Lava Land

A fairly standard lava cave map. My only real comment here is that it was kinda nice how they made the spots where you'd take damage fairly obvious while still making them appear as natural parts of the terrain. I think it was the durandal map in 7 but its "if you're on these at the end of the turn you'll take damage" tiles looked super out of place while the armads map on the other hand wasn't super self-evident and i'm glad they improved

3-9: still cant use lucia >:(

Another party shift (this time to Elincia), and there was some good use of ledges in this chapter!

Most of your units couldn't use them but it created alternate paths for the ones that could (Calill and Devdan). Previous maps tended to use them more as holes in your defenses than needed to be plugged, but it created ways to progress (and ways for reinforcements to catch up) that are usually reserved for flying units, except now you're interacting with the map instead of ignoring it completely.

I think I've yet to meet someone who genuinely likes ledges as a map element, though I think this map really drives home that the sole (inherent) problem with them is the accuracy modifications (which, as this map also demonstrates when the stairs near the end become a chokepoint, are actually present with all elevation changes). While the +2 damage dealt while on the high ground is reasonable, +50 and especially -50 to hitrate are insane and completely unnecessary modifiers. They should be half that if you even choose to retain both.

Anyway.

the absolute lack of a (player-controlled) healer in Elincia's party was also........ interesting. Annoying, but interesting. Why must allied clerics choose death?1

[bearplush]

rules: answer questions and tag 20 blogs you are contractually obligated to know better tagged by: @gyuhug​ (ages ago sorry) and @aftrmidnight​, thank youuuu 😊💞 tagging: ummmm....i dont think i have 20 mutuals that i know haven’t already done this/wouldn’t mind being tagged, especially if i automatically have to exclude 2 of them so. i won’t tag anyone :^) but as usual anyone who wants to can do it and say i tagged them

name/nickname: suzanne gender: 😶 star sign: gemini height: 5′4/162.5cm time: 23:16 birthday: may 22 (why did this ask me for my sign if it was just going to ask me my bday 3 questions later? 🤔) fave bands: wayv, mcr, red velvet fave solo artists: lexie liu, jonghyun, frank ocean song stuck in my head: i’m listening to music right now so none last movie: breaking dawn pt 2.......i had a little twilight marathon last month cause i’d never actually seen the movies before so that was. an experience last show: i haven’t watched tv in ages, the only shows on my want to watch list at the moment aren’t in english but since i only watch tv in the background while i’m working that doesn’t really work 😔 when i created this blog: 2010 🥴 last thing i googled: ‘favorite kind of tea poll’ because i was just curious about people’s tea preferences (if you’re reading this please tell me your favorite kind of tea? personally i don’t like tea enough to have a favorite although there’s this one rooibos (not technically tea ik) blend from davidstea that i really like but i just checked their website and apparently they don’t sell it anymore?? omg 😢) other blogs: none do i get asks: only when i accidentally imply that kun did something interesting 😅 following: around 125, but like a quarter of them have been inactive for years but i can’t bring myself to unfollow cause i liked them :( followers: the actual number is kind of meaningless since over half of them followed me in 2014/2015 or earlier and at this point i can only assume they're no longer active or they have my url blacklisted lmao. anyone who is still here from that time though ily 😙 why i chose my url: rainbow v is one of my favorite things wayv ever did, and i like that it’s a wayv url without being like. in your face about it. also i like rainbows average hours of sleep: idk actually, maybe like 5-6 during the week and like 11 on weekends. not great lucky number(s): none instruments: i played piano and flute for many years but i doubt i remember much of either anymore :( what i’m wearing: pj pants and a t-shirt and a big hoodie (very cozie 😌) dream trip: umm i’ve never been a big traveler but i’d probably go anywhere at this point. but maybe germany cause my best irl friend lives there (boring answer but i miss her 🥺) favorite food: granola :/ nationality: usamerican favorite song: i don’t have one (does anyone actually have one single favorite song? i find it hard to believe but again if you’re reading this and you do have one feel free to tell me cause i’m curious 🧐) top 3 fictional universes i’d like to live in: hmmm...to be honest i really don’t think i would do very well in most of the fictional universes that i like 😅 except for maybe animal crossing lol. so i'll just say that, plus the one where me and kun are besties who text each other sky/food/cat/dog pics. the dream 💔

[cas-kingdom]

(1/?) So, I’ve been re-reading all your stories (especially BMB), and first of all: you are an AMAZING writer, do not let anyone tell you otherwise! I’ve been following you since you did that submission on fanfics-and-fluff, and I feel honoured that I’ve watched your skills as an author develop over time. Second of all: I have to tip my hat off to you for how amazingly you write all your characters, they’re not too ooc like people can sometimes make them and it really adds to the story

(2/?) and it makes it really easy to visualise! I especially like Lestrade’s relationship with the reader in your BMB series, since he’s such an underrated character and I love seeing him actively included in fics. I really hope to see more of him in future instalments! Thirdly (ik I’m going on a bit, sorry) : The way you write has actually inspired me to start writing myself very soon; it’s something I’ve always wanted to do but have never really had the motivation to do it.

(3/3) I hope that one day I can be as good as you! Lastly: I wish you and your family nothing but good in the future, and I hope you all stay safe in lockdown. You’re so lucky living by the sea, I love in Birmingham ffs😂 Lots of love from your friendly neighbourhood Lily :)

Oh this is so so sweet of you to say!! I seriously appreciate every word. Characterisation is something I’ve always prided myself on and I think it’s safe to say that after 11 years of writing I’m not too bad 😉 😆 BMB is a very beloved story of mine, and I love their relationship, too! Greg is a character people don’t write about enough. I can’t wait for the chapter when they all go off to Disney together, it’s going to be utterly hilarious!

And I agree with the ooc-ness of some people’s characters... that’s something that will seriously turn me off a story and stop me from reading! 🥴

We are staying as safe as possible in lockdown! Thankfully we’re not like Leicester yet and haven’t gotten our second wave but with all these damn tourists it’s likely that will happen soon! 😤 Dad and I have been told by NHS to stay shielded until August though which isn’t fun at all. Not a lot to keep us busy and it’s irritating, especially as my sister’s going to a socially distanced barbecue with her friends on the beach tomorrow.... 🙄

Anyway. Thank you again. It’s awesome you’ve been here for the 2 and a half years I’ve had this account! Lots of love back. Stay safe, Lily <3

[chubbyheroesworthyheroes]

1. Pumpkin Pie

“I really appreciate you helping me out, Ike,” Oscar said in a gracious rush, handing the younger man a carefully packed box as he all but ran around the kitchen. “Boyd is usually around to help me with this, but he’s picking up Rolf and Mist from school today, and I couldn’t seem to get a hold of anyone else!”

The latter half of the year was always a chaotic mess for their little family-friend-hybrid group. The younger bunch were usually busy with school and other activities until their breaks came up, and the rest of them were dealing with work. They didn’t really have any family -- extended or otherwise -- in other regions to visit during the holidays, so they always made an effort to get together for celebrations. 

Ike shrugged, giving the other man a small but understanding smile as he gingerly hefted the box in his hands to get a good grip on it. It wasn’t very heavy, but he wanted to be careful with it all the same; Oscar had put a lot of work into what was inside. “It’s no bother. I know everyone’s scrambling a bit, and I was free today -- besides, you make it sound like I wouldn’t want to help you out, even if I was busy.” It was a light joke, and Oscar knew that quite well, but anyone that wasn’t very familiar with Ike might not catch on with how blunt and serious he often sounded. 

“I know, but I hate to assume when it comes to something like this…,” Oscar grimaced, brushing floury palms over the relatively clean apron he had on, the action something of a nervous tic. 

Pretty much ever since Ike had known the three brothers, Oscar had gone into cooking overdrive during the holidays. As soon as fall hit, it was all pumpkin spice this and chocolate covered that. He’d make things for friends and family, but he’d also donate a large portion of his time and culinary expertise to non-profit organizations and shelters. October was all things pumpkin, so this month was an assortment of pies, cookies and other sweet treats with that theme. This batch seemed to be all pies, if Ike’s nose was in working order. Doing all the cooking himself, with the occasional helping hand from Mist, Oscar tried not to rope anyone else into working on his passion projects -- little brothers not always exempt from it, but that was the privilege of being the eldest and the one who cooked all of Boyd and Rolf’s meals.

Chatting here and there, the two loaded up enough boxes to fill out the back of Ike’s beat up truck. There were a few places dotted around the city that Oscar wanted to drop them off at, and it took them the better part of the day to deliver them all where they needed to go. Outside of the driving and unloading taking up a good chunk of time an energy, people that worked at the shelters always wanted to talk. Ike wasn’t much of a conversationalist, so as Oscar visited with acquaintances, Ike unloaded boxes and helped out with a few other things if they happened to need it. Despite the fact that he was one of the ones bringing the pies, workers or volunteers would often tell him to help himself to a slice for helping them in the first place -- something he tried to decline, but couldn’t get out of on account of incredibly friendly insistence. 

Ike was well known for his massive appetite, and while he didn’t mind sweet stuff, he preferred something spicier. As the day went on and they made more stops, the more stuffed and uncomfortable the blue haired man got. Eating a lot in one sitting was something he did on the daily, but this was a lot of sweet food to wolf down throughout the day, and his stomach was starting to bitch about it as they drove. His gut grumbled as it tried to work through the load of pie that had been shoved into it, Ike shifting in place as his seat belt dug into his belly the more he ate during the day.

Oscar, polite but hard to read, simply smiled and didn’t say a word about the obvious growing distress of his friend’s stuffed gut. Ike had always been one to enjoy the green haired man’s cooking, wolfing meals down faster than anyone else and usually going back for seconds, thirds and fourths. As someone who loved to cook, it was always a wonderful feeling to see someone so thoroughly love what he made.

By the end of the day, the two men were beat. All the boxes had been dropped off, and they’d earned a good rest for the remaining hours of the day. Crashing on the sofa back at Ike’s place, Ike stifling a groan as he stretched out as much as he could without infringing on Oscar’s space, the older man made an airy noise in the back of is throat, as if he’d just remembered something, and abruptly got up from the couch. Jostled from the movement, Ike glanced over at him to see what was up, Oscar holding up his hands in a “just wait right here” gesture before walking out of the room. Leaning back again, Ike dropped an arm over his eyes, huffing out breath as his stomach complained to him.

Who knew eating so much sweet could lead to so much sour…

With his arm blocking his vision, Ike let out a startled grunt as something was gently but firmly set on his bloated middle. “What the--” he blustered, hand going to stabilize the box as he sat up and maneuvered it into his lap instead. The white cardboard was extremely familiar -- as it should be, after an entire day of handling a dozen other boxes that looked just like this one -- and Ike knew immediately what it was without even opening it.

Pumpkin pie.

Oscar was smiling down at him with that same, pleasant but inscrutable smile on his face. “I’m sure you’re burnt out on it by now, but I wanted to make you something special for helping me out today,” he said, absently shaking a can of whipped cream in his hand like he was trying to draw attention to it without making a big fuss.

“Well…,” Ike stalled for a moment, weighing his already overfull stomach against what he knew was the best tasting pie he’d ever get his hands on. It didn’t take long to settle on an answer.

“I’ve always got room for more of your food, Oscar.” 

[surveys-at-your-service]

Survey #262

WoW will probably start to take over my life again tomorrow oof so expect surveys to slow down some.

What do you wish people wouldn't call you? The only one I don't really like is Girt calling me "kid." He doesn't mean it in a derogatory way or anything like that; he's just always called me that since I was a high school freshman and he was a senior. Now as an adult that's been through things I don't believe anyone deserves, it's kinda weird but more so frustrating as, regardless of his intentions, I somewhat feel belittled. I've never said anything directly about my discomfort, though, so it's my own fault. I just don't want to make him feel bad for doing it for years lmao. What do people say about your name upon learning it for the first time? They don't say anything; my name is very ordinary. Why did you choose the hair length you have? I have a few reasons. The biggest is because I was just bored of average, long hair, and the fact I was at the time having a very hard time with self-care. My hair would get incredibly knotted to where it was hard to even brush it sometimes. Makes me shiver thinking back on it. For my own sanity and ease, it needed to be gone. Also, with how STUPID hot I get, cutting it all off helped with the weight of my hair (it's v thick) but more importantly how hot it made me it the warm months. Zero regrets chopping it all off, omg. If your hair could be ANY color, what would you pick? At this very moment, I really want silver hair. Do you wish your hair was longer or shorter than it is now? It needs a trim. Do you think you're attractive? (It's okay to say yes =P) No; I think I wouldn't look ALL to bad if I lost some more weight (I've literally been on a weight loss plateau for two fuckin years). When I was perfectly healthy, I didn't think I was very pretty even back then, but now that I look back, I feel I was decently pretty. Not gorgeous, but. What is your favorite band? Ozzy Osbourne. :') What is your favorite movie? The Lion King. The second one is like directly behind it. Finding Nemo is also very precious to me. What is your favorite book or magazine? The Outsiders by S.E. Hinton and Johnny Got His Gun by Dalton Trumbo. What is your favorite song? Ugh, this is impossible. I love way way too many. I suppose maybe... "Death Inc." by Motionless In White? Idk. What is your favorite color to wear? Black, duh. If you could visit anywhere in the world, where would you go and why? South Africa because I want to spend time with and take pictures at the Kalahari Meerkat Project and especially pet a Whiskers meerkat. I WILL cry. Meerkats literally changed my life. So many people I wouldn't know... If you got the chance and wouldn't get caught, would you cheat on a lover? NOOOOO the guilt though. Someone drops a fifty dollar bill and doesn't notice. Will you tell them? Definitely. I'd feel awful otherwise. Would you ever pierce something on your face? I already have my lip and tongue pierced, and I did have my nostril pierced, too. I want more, particularly an undereye microdermal if I can switch to contacts... which I don't like. I think it'd look pretty dumb with glasses. Are you selfish? EVERYONE should be to a degree depending on the occasion. Doing what is best for you is not a bad thing. Are you mean to people who are different from you? Wow no. I find people "different" from me interesting. Do you make fun of obese people? By the BMI definition, I am one of those people. So take a guess? Do you eat when you're upset? I have to fight that extremely hard, because I usually do experience the impulse to comfort eat when I'm very depressed. I've gotten way better at it, though. What if you had to choose between feeding yourself or feeding your pets? I honestly don't know for sure what I'd do... but I think I would prioritize my pets, honestly. It would break me to watch them suffer and lose weight. What if you saw someone being beaten on the street? YOOOO I READ THIS AS "EATEN" FIRST. But anyway I'd call the cops ASAP. There's a possibility I'd intervene if I felt myself capable of taking on the assailant. What if it was you being beaten? According to the night terrors I've had beyond count, curse like a motherfucker and fight back while calling for help. Who's the most important person to you (related)? Mom. Who's the most important person to you (non-related)? Sara. What's more important to you, happiness or success? Happiness. What's more important to you, your happiness or someone else's? Depends on the person. List the ten most important things to you: Oh, yikes. No order: 1.) My peace of mind, health, and happiness; 2.) my family; 3.) my pets; 4.) my career future; 5.) my friends; 6.) a YouTuber I've never met lmao; 7.) my pebble from my partial hospitalization program; 8.) Teddy's ashes; 9.) the Mark mug Sara gave me sobs; 10.) and the RP site I'm on. Like if it disappeared tomorrow with all the profiles and history and stuff I would break the earth in half oof. Have you ever lived in a mobile home? No. Have you ever had your bedroom in a basement? No. How many times in the past week have you eaten fast food? Hm. I don't think once. In the house - shoes, socks, slippers or bare feet? Bare feet.\ Do you consider dogs inside or outside pets? Usually indoor, depending on the breed and the time of year. What’s your favourite piece of furniture in your house? ig my bed? Have you ever had a crush on a friend’s parent? Yikes no. Do you prefer carbonated or uncarbonated drinks? Sucker for carbonated over here. Favorite thing that you can see up in the sky? A full moon. Would you rather eat at the table or in your room? I'm so used to eating in my room. Do you like the sound of birds singing when you wake up, or is it annoying? I love it. If someone gave you a kitten, would you keep it? I'd love to, but it'd really be my mom's choice. What’s your ideal activity for a rainy day? Nap oh lawd. Favorite type of cracker? Cheez-Its. Banana sandwich... yum or yuck? Only yum with peanut butter. Animal you like to watch but sort of creeps you out: Spiders. Bagels or English Muffins? Bagels. Do you like to daydream about sex? I do it sometimes. Which of your parents do you laugh more with? My dad is really funny. Have you ever been to an open casket wake or funeral? Wake, yes. Who mows the lawn at your house? A family friend. Have you ever written a story from beginning to end? When I was little and was writing that meerkat story, yes. I started on the sequel but didn't get far. What’s a big turn on for you? Being genuinely interested in what makes me me. Actually wanting to know the littlest things about me. Just show sincere interest. Are you doing anything tomorrow? I do know I'm fuckin finally getting my laptop home. Does your car have a name? N/A Do you own clothes from any celebrity clothing lines? No, but a bitch is getting a Cloak shirt or hoodie at some point. Who was the last person you ranted about? My bitch of a cousin for being a disrespectful fuck when all my dying grandmother wants is to talk as a group with the whole family. I ranted to Mom though, not in the group chat because I'm actually mature enough to not talk shit when, again, all our grandma wants is peace and love between us at the end of her life. I was SEETHING. Know any magic tricks? I don't remember any. I LOOOOOVED those magic kits as a kid, though. Is there music in your head right now? Right now "Dirty Pretty" by In This Moment is on, so does that count as "in my head?" Would you like to become a dancer? It'd be very cool, most certainly, and due to taking dance classes so long, I tend to think of potential dances in my head when I hear like... any song, lol. I'd love to be one if I had the grace and endurance + no hyperhydrosis. Name one person of the same sex as you you wouldn't mind doing: Hunny I'm bisexual, there's a lot, lmao. Dream woman? Uhhhh. Maybe my friend Alon. She was like one of my first hints I wasn't straight, lmao. But idk, I find soooo many women to be attractive. What is the most gory film you've seen? One of the Saw movies. What a surprise, ik. Ever fallen down a hole? ZOINKS no. Do you work better in a clean or messy environment? Clean, durr. Do you know any vegans? Only online. Do you like bananas? I am VERY picky with bananas. They have to be perfect. My preferred ripeness lasts only like, two days. .-. What's a film you've seen that confused you? Oh boy, idk. I don't watch many films... especially if I'm confused and the plot isn't great, I'll stop watching. WAIT!!!!!! NO!!!!!!!! I went to see Warcraft when it came out and I was so fuckin lost just because the orcs' voices are so goddamn deep that I just sat there like "uhhhh sir come again????" I didn't play Classic, and I'm not great at remembering every aspect of the plot, so. I'm to this day p confused lmao. Do you ever wear black lipstick? I really only ever wear black. What is next to your bed? I have a white shelf to my left where I put my meds, a drink, the fan... that kind of stuff. My cat's food bowl is to the right of it on the floor. Are your fingernails dirty? Nope. Have you ever fell for someone believing you could "fix" them? Not for that reason, no. Describe a picture of yourself that you hate: LASKJDLKFJAOWJE my friend took a picture of me eating a hot dog once and joked she was putting that shit on Facebook and it was funny as shit but thank Christ she was in fact joking. Would you rather play a good or an evil character in a play? While I'd love to be the evil one, I'd probably make it too cheesy because I am a BAD actress. Has anybody ever lied to you just to impress you? Story of one of my "best" friendships. What's your favourite shade of blue? Baby blue, probs. Can you remember a world before iPods? I do indeed. On rides to school when I sat in the back, I would bring one of those portable CD players with me to play discs. Where did you go on your last date? I can't remember the place's name... Lume's? Something like that? Breakfast place in Illinois. Do people find you "cute"? It happens sometimes. Who does the best remixes? Oh idk, I don't pay much attention to this. Where do you get your news? Facebook, lmao. What social stigma does society need to get over? What DOESN'T it need to get over???? What was the last photo you took? Probably something funny on Facebook to send to Sara lmao. I will get memes to her some way. What mythical creature do you wish actually existed? As badly as I want to say dragons, I don't think it'd be a great idea, heh... Maybe dryads. What are you interested in that most people aren't? As of recently, TARANTULAS. I've fallen in LOVE with them. What's the most ridiculous thing you have bought? No clue. What sounds hit you with major nostalgia every time you hear them? The gem collecting sound from Spyro. It was my text ringtone on my last phone! I need to move it over to my current one. What was the biggest realization you have had about yourself? I was possibly the bigger villain than Jason in the breakup. But idk. What topic could you spend forever talking about? Gay rights. Which way should toilet paper hang, over or under? In the original patent, it was designed as going over. GMM knowledge. Therefore I find over as correct, BUT I ultimately don't care like... at all. I don't even really notice when I go in the bathroom. Are you usually early or late? Usually slightly early. What do you wish you knew more about? Politics so I could be a more helpful member of society alksdjfka;lw What is the most annoying question you've been asked? It's not really like, annoying I guess, but the closest would be just how frequently people see my lip ring and ask if it hurt. It's incredibly sensitive skin, and even if it wasn't, a needle went all the way through it. Like... guess. News flash: being stabbed hurts, lmao. Like I always explain that it's not awful, but duh, there is pain. What is your favorite milkshake flavor? Yummm chocolate. What was the worst phase in your life? 2020 thinks it's a bad guy, but lemme tell ya, shit's got nothing on 2016. Do you like sprinkles on your ice cream? I hate sprinkles on anything. Just an annoying texture with negligible flavor. The last time you went out to eat - what did you order? It was just a milkshake. Do you have all 32 teeth? I'm missing two wisdom teeth that just never grew in. Do you know how to do the moon walk? Never tried. What is one of your favorite comedy movies? White Chicks. Has anybody ever told you that you have a good singing voice? Yeah. I don't think I do. Onion rings or french fries? Fries. Not an onion ring fan. Who is the best cook that you know? Sara's mom is great, omgggg. She's cooked things I generally don't like yet I wound up enjoying. Can you name 3 different dinosaurs? Let's see: Spinosaurus, stegosaurus, velociraptor. I was a dino kid, man, just gettin' started. *finger guns* What's the largest amount that you can juggle at one time? I can’t juggle. What was your favorite thing to go on at the playground as a kid? I'd daaaash for the swingset. Do you know how much you weighed at birth? How much? Ummm I think 6-something pounds? 7? Where do you spend most of your time at? At home. In my bed. Exciting stuff, y'know. What noise does your favorite animal make? If my memory serves me right, they have over 40 vocalizations, but I'd say barking and chirping are the most ordinary/basic. Have you ever fallen in the toilet when you were little? lol I don't think so. What is the best kind of mac & cheese? I'm a basic-ass Velveeta bitch lmao. Who is your favorite oldies band? Boy oh BOY, you're asking a classic rock/metal addict. Of course it's Ozzy tho. But I love soooo many!! What is your favorite farm animal? Pigs! Do you like to play Monopoly? I'm not a big fan, no. What is the most fun restaurant you have ever been to? I like the vibe of Buffalo Wild Wings. Or I just have good memories there. What size bra do you wear? I'm actually not sure. I haven't bought new ones in a while and I don't think the ones I currently have are the right size anyway. Do you have a ceiling fan in your room? No. Who was your favorite Sesame Street character? I don't remember too well, but I think Cookie Monster? What about Muppet? Idr. What was going through your mind during the presidential campaign? I am sadly paying no attention. What do you think of the Duggar family ( 17+ kids )? Could you handle taking care of that many children? Ew, hell no. I don't believe the number of children warranted in a family should be legally monitored, it's much more difficult than that, BUT RATHER I'm very firm about knowing when it's more than enough. Population control is a thing. NOBODY needs that many kids imo, not even close to that. So far, what is the number one, best decision you have ever made? How has it affected your life? Letting go of Jason/accepting life without him. It has made my life much, much brighter and healthier. Have you reunited with any old friends recently? Was it awkward, or just like old times? No. When was the last time you talked to your first ex? February of 2017. Wow... been a long time. How different is your online personality from your offline personality? I am MUCH more outgoing and talkative online. What are your favorite holiday-themed movies? Jim Carrey's How The Grinch Stole Christmas, Hocus Pocus, The Nightmare Before Christmas, etc... Do you listen to Christmas/winter-themed music when the season comes around? No. Is there anything that you do that’s potentially controversial? Yes. What is your most recent obsession? Most recent, whew, tarantulas. I'm really gonna try talking Mom into letting me get one when/if we move. Do you say “merry Christmas” or “happy holidays”? To you, does it really matter which one is said/you say? Do you do your best to remain politically correct? Instinctually, I say "merry Christmas;" that's what has always been said around me. I personally see zero problem in calling it whatever... Like just appreciate someone wishing you well. You get the concept, and that's all you really need imo. As for political correctness, I'm kinda... down the middle? Like I feel it's been taken way, way too far, but I see some caution in wording as wise. If you could relive one week of your life, which would it be, and why? Would you do anything differently, or keep it all the same? Ugh, my first visit at Sara's. I just loved it so, so much. I think I wouldn't change a thing. It felt perfect. Is there a part of your life you wish you could remember, but can’t? Sometimes when I take these surveys and they ask "how old were you when...", ha ha. Frustrates me. What was the last thing/event to trigger a painful memory? It was last night, actually. The Final Fantasy VII remake is out, and I started watching a YouTuber I like play it. Jason got me to play the original, playing it a lot when we spent time together, but I only got a bit beyond half-way through before my PS3 broke. Cherished memories, so it was decently triggering indeed. I loved the game though and ABSOLUTELY want to see it played out in its entirety, so I shoved past the pain and am glad I did. Now I'm anxiously awaiting the next video aljkdsjfawe Y'ALL I wanna play more FF. What do you think of people that choose not to vote? I can't say anything, seeing as I never have voted before... Are you keeping anything from the people you love? Nothing important, no. Have you ever written a suicide note, whether joking or not? Yes, and that stupid novel is one of my biggest regrets. Who the FUCK would joke about that, though. When was the last time you let something ‘go to your head’? Not even like an hour ago. This happens allllll the time. When are you most likely to show off? Maaan Guitar Hero used to be good for that shit, ha ha. I was an expert at that back in its day. I haven't played it in forever, and on the rare occasion I do, I am suuuper rusty. Which would you prefer: spectacular view of the ocean, or of the mountains? MOUNTAINS!!!!!! Do you follow any dating rules/play any dating games? No. When was the last time you felt extremely confident about something? ME????????? CONFIDENT???????????? WHAT A CONCEPT!!!!!!!!!! When was the last time you blew the seeds off of a dandelion? Wow, not a clue. Probably not since we lived at my old house and I would go on walks down the path. What was the last thing that happened that you couldn’t explain? Oh I dunno. What do you do with all of your spare change? I just keep it in my wallet. Where did you hear about your all-time favorite band? He was and still is one of my mom's favorites! How many cans of soda do you drink in a day? AHHHHHH soda is my biggest nutritional weakness. I refuse to let myself drink more than one a day now though. It's funny and disgusting, when I was HEALTHY AND SKINNY I could on a rare occasion start a fourth can in a single day. Nowadays the thought almost makes me shiver. What is the oldest thing that you own? and the newest? The oldest thing, ummm. Not sure. Probably a stuffed animal in the attic. I just got two new books today! Is there anything you wish you had never found out about? Yep. A number of things. What is something that you refuse to believe in? Astrology. What is something you wish more people believed in? Gay rights. What food is your ultimate comfort food? Ice cream. Have you ever put anything inside a time capsule? What? OMGGGG I remember doing this in elementary school as a class! I don't recall what was in it, though. Is there too much violence on tv, or are people to sensitive? Too sensitive, but also negligent. It's got a lot to do with raising, imo. Don't show kids wild shit at too young of an age, and when they are shown this kind of stuff, you make it obvious that the behavior/content is unacceptable irl. Entertainment is not responsible for someone's shitty actions made with their own volition. What is something you used to fear, but no longer do? My first huge fear was thunderstorms. Now I enjoy them lol. Do you think it’s important to know a 2nd language? Not mandatory, no. Especially depends on if you're going anywhere. Do you know anyone that’s just naturally good at almost everything? My old friend Hannia IMMEDIATELY came to mind. She was the best in class GPA-wise, first chair for flute in band, and just in general STUPID talented. Do you know anyone that’s just bad at everything? BITCH ME What is one emoticon you use often? A sarcastic :^) or <3 What is one emoticon you almost never use? A lot, particularly ones with equal signs for eyes.