#ig its cause 30 years ago it did feel like not much more than an abstract possibility

[lipstickontheglass1985]

wow it is truly striking how relevant ds9 remains to be after all these years. plot points such as "quark tries to secretly make deepfake ai porn of kira" seem to be even more material today than 30 years ago !

[surveys-at-your-service]

Survey #443

“it’s not a life sentence, but a death dream for you”

When was the last time you were in the hospital? Me personally, uhhh sometime in 2017? Why were you there? I had a cyst removal surgery. Do you like Cheez-Its or Cheese Nips better? Cheez-Its. Have you worn headphones at all today? Yeah, I pretty much always do because YouTube is always open and on a video. When was the last time you had blood drawn? A few months ago or something? I'll be getting some drawn shortly though for genetic testing; due to my mom having some dysfunctional cancer prevention gene, all her children are getting tests to see if we inherited it. The last time you got blood drawn, what was the reason? I want to say I was tested for anemia most recently. What color eyes does/did your father have? Brown. What do you daydream most about? Things I wish I didn't daydream about. What is your relation to the last child you spoke to? They're my niece and nephew. Do you believe the Holocaust happened? No fucking shit? Do you prefer zebra stripes, tiger stripes, or leopard spots? Tiger stripes, ig. When did you last see a dog? At my nephew's b-day party a couple weeks ago. Nicole brought her dog Zeke over. Have you ever been in the mountains when the moon and stars were up? No, but omg I wish!!!!!!!!!! Do you know anyone from Canada? Yep. Has a cat ever licked you? Yeah. Roman especially loves to give kisses. Where would you most like to go in your state, etc. that you haven’t been? The Wizard of Oz park, probs. Are you scared to look at your own organs on x-ray or ultrasound? No, that shit's rad. o: Have you ever walked on a frozen lake/river? No, that sketches me out. I'd be afraid of the ice breaking and me falling in. Have you ever seen a volcano? No. Have you ever met an Alaskan? Met in-person, no. But I do have an online friend who's from Alaska. Or may still live there? Idk. Have you ever mowed the lawn (even a little bit)? No. Have any unpleasant public transit stories to tell? Nah. Do you know any German words? Seeing as I took four semesters of the language in high school, I know a good deal. However, my skill has definitely atrophied with time and lack of application. Do you have a passport? No. Are your teeth straight? I mean, mostly. I had braces for too long, but I didn't wear my retainer, so they've moved back some. Would you mind dating someone significantly shorter than you? Yeah, sure. I've never understood why height is an issue for some people. Can you quote the movie Mean Girls? No. I personally never got the craze. Have you ever swam in the Atlantic Ocean? I have. The Pacific? No. Can you make yourself cry? No. Have you ever held a starfish? Not a live one. What would you do if you found out your ex was pregnant/fathered a child? Faint or vomit. Wail. All three. Are you very close to your siblings? No. :/ Can you do CPR? No. Favorite sport to watch in the summer Olympics? I don't care. Ever flushed a fish? Yes. Ever been paid for sex or a sexual favor? No. I wouldn't agree to that. Last friend you talked to online? Sara. Has anyone ever said you looked like a celebrity? No. What is the best ice cream flavor? Vanilla. You have so many topping options. What’s your favorite thing to do outside? Photograph nature, especially wild animals. What would you spend $1,000 on? A big, really pro tattoo. What was the best (non-romantic) night you’ve had? Hm. I don't know. Who did you last lay in a bed/couch/recliner with? Mom and I sat together on the couch some time ago. Do you keep a planner? No. What are you craving right now? I've got a seriously random craving for shell pasta with a nice, meaty tomato sauce. Do you want kids anytime soon? DEFINITELY not soon, but also never. Has anyone ever drunk called/texted you? No. Have you ever slept in the same bed with the last person you kissed? Yeah. What’s the best feeling in the world? Knowing you're in love and really feeling it. What’s something you really want right now, be honest. There's a lot of things. Who in your family do you act like the most? I don't know, really. Who has made the biggest sacrifice for you? My mom, 100%. Do you believe that your first true love can be your only love in life? Of course not. Have you ever kissed under water? Yes. Is there that one guy that you’ll always have feelings for no matter what? Suuuure is. Wish it wasn't like that, but I don't see it ever changing, to be real... Are you 100% over the last person you kissed? 100%? No, I can't say I am entirely. Have your parents ever caught you kissing a guy? "Caught me?" How old is this question meant for? Yes, they've seen me kiss a guy before. If you mean like, seriously kiss-kissing, no. Which one of your exes hates you the most? Probably Jason. Are you named after anyone? No. Well, my middle name has been passed down, but "Brittany" wasn't from anybody else in specific. What reminds you the most of your last relationship? The song "The Only Exception" by Paramore. Have you ever rejected someone but they still wouldn’t give up on you? In elementary school, yes. When growing up, did your family always eat at the dinner table together? Usually, yes, at least when growing up. Sometimes we'd use little tables to eat in the living room though while watching TV. What is the greatest source of happiness in your life? My mom, best friend, and pets. What was the last charity/cause you donated to? I'm unsure, actually. Who was the last person you got a handwritten letter from? Sara! :') Did your parents read bedtime stories to you when you were little? Mom did. Have any of your worst fears ever come true? Yes. The greatest fear I've ever had was losing Jason, and that happened. Is anyone in your family divorced? My parents, for one. My older half-sister has also be divorced because her ex is an absolute piece of manipulative horse shit. Has anyone in your family gotten pregnant as a teenager? I think my mom? No, maybe not... Idk. I ain't doing the math. What’s your greatest talent? If you want a serious answer and not something self-depracating, I suppose writing. Would you ever want to get a master’s degree? It'd be cool, but I've never *actually* wanted to pursue that. Have you ever worn revealing clothing in order to get attention? No. Have you ever been falsely accused of being racist? I've never been accused of being racist, because I'm not. To you, is sex just about physical pleasure, or do you see it as an expression of love and commitment? Absolutely the latter. I could never engage in sex without deep emotional commitment. How many times have you been drunk in the past 6 months? Zero. What’s your favorite French food? I have no idea. What’s the most elaborate recipe you know how to cook? Nothing. Which rooms of your house have doors that lead outside? The living room and kitchen. Best purchase you ever made? My snake. :') Is there anybody you think is hot over the age of 40? I haven't seen him a long time, but boy did I have a thing for James Hetfield in high school. There are defs others, but no one else immediately comes to mind. Have you ever been caught sneaking out? No, because I've never tried to. How many Facebooks have you had? Just the one I still use. Have you ever been punched in the face? No. When was the last time you talked to the first person you kissed? The beginning of February, 2017. What is the latest you have ever slept in? Past 5. Do you have to watch yourself in the mirror while you brush your teeth? No. Do you text when you drive? Fuck no. You couldn't pay me to. What movie do you really want to see that’s out? I don't even know what movies are out right now. Did America really put a man on the moon? Eventually, yes. Call me crazy, but I do believe the supposed first one was faked, though, to "beat" Russia in the space race. Do some research and it's pretty shocking. Would you like to date someone a lot purer than you? Idc. Do you turn your phone off at night when you go to sleep? No, but I turn the brightness down for if I wake up in the middle of the night and want to check the time. Have you slept in a bed with the last person you kissed? Yeah. Has anyone ever told you that they loved you, and you didn’t say it back? Yes. Has anyone ever played a prank on you? What happened? I don't believe so. Do you like tattoos and piercings? Helllll yes. :') What are you really into? Animals, art, some weird Korean guy on the Internet... Do your parents like your best friends? Yes. Have you ever taken a nap with a member of the opposite sex? Yeah. Do you have weak upper body strength? Yes. What color was the last cup you drank from? It's just clear glass. How old is your oldest sibling? I actually don't know her exact age. 30-something. What was the last thing you ate that had nuts in it? A Nature Valley cashew bar I had earlier today. How many pieces did the last puzzle you completed have? I have no idea. Who did you last shake hands with? uhhhhhhhh Has anybody asked you out on a date recently? Nah. When was the last time somebody asked you to be their girlfriend? When Girt asked me out a few years ago. Name something you’re picky about: Food. Who did you last ask for help? My mom. Do you like corn? Yeah. If you were offered to smoke some weed right now, would you accept? Right now I honestly probably would, believe it or not. Honestly, who is the last person to tell you that they love you? My mum. Have you ever made out for more than a half hour straight? Yeah. How do you earn money? The only occasions where I ever and very rarely earn money is if someone (non-family, of course) pays me to take pictures for them. Where were you raised? All you need to know is a crappy town in eastern NC. Are your ears gauged? No, but I want the first holes in my earlobes to be, but only with very small gauges. I just can't figure out how to do it myself, at least with the gauges I have. I think I'm missing something. Explain what triggered your last kiss? We were saying goodbye. Could you go a month without talking to your best friend? I mean I could, but it'd seriously fucking suck. Have you ever made out in a park? No, because I don't do that in public. What are you listening to? "Paint You With My Love" by Marilyn Manson. I wasn't big on the album when it came out, but this is one of the songs that's aight to me. Last thing you said out loud? I gave Venus a little wave and said "hey babe" or something like that like I do sometimes when she's slithering around and looks out towards me. Are you sad? Always at least a little bit. I have been kinda down this evening. Where is your dad? I would hope at home. He's probably watching TV, or maybe in bed.

[raganandhersurveys]

3/1/21~5000 question survey 1-100 {CXV}

I started this about 2 years ago and never finished so I’m going to restart and see how far I can get. I’d love to get it done before the end of the year but I am definitely not holding myself to that statement haha. Here we go pt. 2 

(also shoutout to @lovemesomesurveys for doing this so i could get the questions from one source. Thanks girl! <3!!

1. Who are you?

~my name is ragan

2. What are the 3 most important things everyone should know about you?

1. I am very outgoing and fun loving 

2. I have a big heart but am not afraid to speak my mind

3. I hope I can one day pursue a career in fashion

3. When you aren't filling out 5,000 question surveys like this one what are you doing? 

~hanging out with my friends, doing hw, eating, or talking to my bf haha

4. List your classes in school from the ones you like the most to the ones you like the least (or if you are out of school, think of the classes you did like and didn't like at the time). 

~choir, drama appreciation, geology, american gov. 

5. What is your biggest goal for this year? 

~to begin to plan out “big girl things” in my life. i’ll be a freshman in college in the fall and i really wanna feel confident about my future(if that’s possible) so saving money, getting a real job, looking into new opportunities, etc. (if you have any advice, plz send my way haha:))

6. Where do you want to be in 5 years? 

~to feel a little secure in my job or career pathway, or at least have a plan

7. What stage of life are you in right now? 

~the ending of my teenage years :(

8. Are you more child-like or childish? 

~neither honestly 

9. What is the last thing you said out loud? 

~i was singing along to a song haha

10. What song comes closest to how you feel about your life right now? 

~8teen by khalid haha

11. Have you ever taken martial arts classes? 

~nope

12. Does your life tend to get better or worse or does it just stay the same? 

~it’s honestly one big rollercoaster. i have my good days and bad days but i try to keep a positive mindset:)

13. Does time really heal all wounds? 

~it doesn’t necessarily heal it but it does help it some

14. How do you handle a rainy day? 

~usually stay inside or take a nap. if it rains for a long period of time i tend to get a headache so i usually take a nap haha

15. Which is worse...losing your luggage or having to sort out tangled holiday lights?

~losing luggage for sure 

16. How is your relationship with your parents? 

~pretty good. my dad and i are super close. my mom and i have our moments but i love her

Will you miss them when they are gone? 

~are you kidding?!?! i don’t know how i’ll recover from losing them tbh

17. Do you tend to be aware of what is going on around you? 

~for the most part yes; i’m pretty good at reading the room

18. What is the truest thing that you know? 

~God.

19. What did you want to be when you grew up? 

~gosh so many different things; teacher, pharmacist, reporter, author, family therapist, actress 

20. Have you ever been given a second chance? 

~yep

21. Are you more of a giver or a taker? 

~both tbh

22. Do you make your decisions with an open heart/mind?

~definitely 

23. What is the most physically painful thing that has ever happened to you? 

~i had to go to the hospital one time because my stomach was hurting so bad I thought i was gonna die. i don’t think anything except child birth could beat that

24. What is the most emotionally painful thing that has ever happened to you? 

~some things my mom has said to me

25. Who have you hugged today? 

~honestly no one :(

26. Who has done something today to show they care about you? 

~i can’t think of anything but i’m sure there was something 

27. Do you have a lot to learn? 

~for sure. i don’t think we should ever stop

28. If you could learn how to do three things just by wishing and not by working what would they be?

~how to start my own clothing brand, how to make straight a’s, and to cook perfectly

 29. Which do you remember the longest: what other people say, what other people do or how other people make you feel? 

~how they make me feel fo sure 

30. What are the key ingredients to having a good relationship? 

~communication, loyalty, passion, 

31. What 3 things do you want to do before you die? 

~have a successful job, find the love of my life, and travel the world 

 32. What three things would you want to die to avoid doing? 

~having to get divorced, letting down my future children, and emotionally traumatizing someone 

33. Is there a cause you believe in more than any other cause? 

~not a cause, but i’m a christain and that’s the truest thing in my life 

34. What does each decade make you think of:

The 19.. 

 20's: flapper dancers and the roaring 20s

 30's: the great depression and poverty

 40's: world war II and classic movies

50's: sock hops and diners

 60's: iconic fashion and audrey hepburn

 70's: my dad and classic rock

 80's: the breakfast club and how much i wished i grew up then ahahah

 90's: rnb and friends

 2000 (so far): brittany spears and my early childhood

 2010's: middle school and social media 

 35. Which decade do you feel the most special connection to and why?

~the 80s because i’ve always felt like that was the decade for me. that’s when my mom grew up and i envy her so much for growing up then. but also the 2000s because that was my early childhood and its crazy to think i’ll never get those days back 

36. What is your favorite oldie/classic rock song? 

~stairway to heaven: led zeppelin

37. What country do you live in and who is the leader of that country? 

~the usa and president biden 

If you could say any sentence to the current leader of your country what would it be?

~you good homie?

38. What's your favorite TV channel to watch in the middle of the night? 

~i rarely watch live tv

39. What Disney villain are you the most like and why? 

~bahah probs ursula because if i knew ariel could sing like that, i’d steal her voice too

40. Have you ever been a girl scout/boy scout? 

~no

41. If you were traveling to another continent would you rather fly or take a boat? 

~neither but a boat in the middle of the ocean during a storm would be terrifying 

42. Why is the sky blue during the day and black at night? 

~the sun?

43. What does your name mean? 

~i just looked it up and apparently it means noble LMFAO

44. Would you rather explore the deeps of the ocean or outer space? 

~neither. both of those sound like a bad idea 

45. Word association What is the first word that comes to mind when you see the word:

Air: traffic

Meat: steak

Different: breed

Pink: drink

Deserve: freedom

White: elephant 

Elvis: graceland

Magic: treehouse

Heart: pump

Clash: boom

Pulp: fiction

46. If you could meet any person in the world who is dead who would you want it to be? 

~audrey hepburn 100%

47. What if you could meet anyone who is alive? 

~jimmy garoppolo ;))

48. Is there a movie that you love so much you could watch it everyday?

~not everyday but i’m always down for a lotr/hobbit marathon

49. You are going to be stuck alone in an elevator for a week. What do you bring to do? 

~a phone with some kind of wifi box so i can gtfo lmao

 50. Have you ever saved someone's life or had your life saved?

~uhhhh not that i can think of 

51. Make up a definition for the following silly words... 

 Fruitgoogle: a website you can search up fruits with

 Ambytime: free time

 Asscactus: an annoying person

 52. What was the last thing you made with your own hands?

~this little gift bag for my mom’s students 

53. What was your favorite toy as a child? 

~american girl dolls omfg 

54. How many TV’s are in your house? 

~3

55. What is your favorite thing to do outside? 

~swimming or just being at the beach

56. How do you feel when you see a rainbow? 

~awwwwww

57. Have you ever dreamt a dream that came true? 

~i have dreamed about people and then met them which is a super weird experience 

58. Have you ever been to a psychic/tarot reader? 

~no

59. What is your idea of paradise?

~i think it would be a couple of different places or themes because i love to see the beauty in a lot of different ideas

60. Do you believe in god and if so what is he/she/it like? 

~absolutely. He’s just and loving 

61. Do you believe in Hell? 

~yes

62. What one thing have you done that most people haven't? 

~i honestly cannot think of anything 

63. What is the kindest thing you have ever done?

~i’ve done some volunteer stuff for other people so ig something like that 

64. Are you a patient person? 

~i try to be 

65. What holiday should exist but doesn't? 

~free shopping day where only i can shop for free :))))))

66. What holiday shouldn't exist but does?

~i love all the holidays 

67. What's the best joke you ever heard? 

~apparently none because i can’t think of one

68. Where is the most fun place you have EVER been? 

~southpoint mall in charlotte. it was shopper’s heaven 

69. Is your hair natural or dyed? 

~all natural .

70. Do you have any deep dark secrets or are you pretty much up front? 

~none that are interesting 

71. What is under your bed right now? 

~dust and stuff from my childhood

72. If you were in the Land of Oz would you want to live there or go home? 

~gtfo bahaha

73. If you drive do you frequently speed? 

~always

74. What is the world's best song to dance to? 

~depends on what kind of dancing. any 2000s club song is an absolute banger 

75. What song was on the last time you danced with someone?

~some tik tok sound. just a gen z kid here :)

76. Do you prefer Disney or Warner Brothers? 

~probs disney 

77. What is the first animal you would run to see if you went to the zoo? 

~otters or tigers 

78. Would you consider yourself to be romantic?

~if i’m crazy about you, absolutely. .

79. If the earth stopped rotating would we all fly off? 

~ig lol

80. What is the one thing that you love to do so much that you would make sacrifices to be able to do it? 

~travel all over 

81. If you (and everyone) had to lose one right or freedom, but you could pick which one everyone had to lose, what would you pick? 

~i’m sorry that’s too stressful lol

82. If you had to choose would you live on the equator or at the North Pole? ~equator. i hate the cold 

83. Would you rather give up listening to music or watching television?

~tv. i can’t live w/o music

84. What do you think makes someone a hero? 

~being selfless 

85. What cartoon would you like to be a character in? 

~powderpuff girls 100%

86. Name one thing that turns your stomach:

~rats

87. What was the last thing you paid for? 

~clothes from shein

88. Are you a coupon clipper?

~nah

89. Get anything good in the mail recently? 

~not super recently 

90. Which would you rather take as a gym class...dancing, sailing, karate, or bowling? 

~dancing 

91. In Star Trek people 'beam' back and forth between different places. What this means is they stand in a little tube and their molecules are deconstructed and sent to another tube somewhere else where they are reassembled. Only problem is when the molecules are deconstructed the person is dead. When they are put back together it is only a clone that has all the dead person's memories. So... Is the person who gets beamed the same person on both ends? 

~no because the real person died, so it’s a clone but not the original

92. What insects are you afraid of? 

~roaches and wasps

93. If you could print any phrase on a T-shirt, what would it say? 

~”she stressin’ over her wardrobe” 

94. What's the most eccentric thing you have ever worn? 

~i have these huuuuge tiger earrings that are freaking extra. i wore them with green corduroy flair pants and a brown stripped shirt and literally looked like the 70s threw up on me hahah

95. If you could pick one food that you could eat all you wanted but it would have no effect on how much you weigh, what food would it be? 

~chick fil a

96. What are your parents interested in? 

~my mom loves 70s tv shows and christmas lol and my dad likes classic rock and anything to do with christianity

97. Have you ever caught an insect and kept it as a pet?

~we used to catch lightning bugs in a jar when i was little and put them in a jar.

98. What is more helpful to you, wishes or plans?

~uhhh plans....lol

99. When do you feel your life energy the strongest? 

~when i’m hanging out with friends or at a high energy place like an amusement park or concert

100. You are spending the night alone in the woods and may bring only 3 items with you. What do you bring?

~water, a flashlight, and something for protection like a gun

[skiasurveys]

393

1. How old would you be if you didn’t know how old you are? um,,? I would assume I was a young adult ig?

2.Which is worse, failing or never trying? never trying, b/c you would never  know if you were good or not. 3. If life is so short, why do we do so many things we don’t like and like so many things we don’t do?  idk..man because we feel forced by society 4. When it’s all said and done, will you have said more than you’ve done ? I hope not. 5. What is the one thing you’d most like to change about the world? I wish people would stop flexing. 6. If happiness was the national currency, what kind of work would make you rich? spending time with my loved ones tbh, and making art. 7. Are you doing what you believe in, or are you settling for what you are doing? rn i am in college so 8. If the average human life span was 40 years, how would you live your life differently? no different. 9. To what degree have you actually controlled the course your life has taken? a little, im trying to fix it. 10. Are you more worried about doing things right, or doing the right things? doing things right..i always think im gonna be a failure. 11. You’re having lunch with three people you respect and admire. They all start criticizing a close friend of yours, not knowing she is your friend. The criticism is distasteful and unjustified. What do you do? I would let them know that she is my friend and i find it disrespectful of what theyre saying. 12. If you could offer a newborn child only one piece of advice, what would it be? Honestly, dont worry about what others say. do what you want. 13. Would you break the law to save a loved one? yeah i would.

14. Have you ever seen insanity where you later saw creativity? Yeah look at most art lol 15. What’s something you know you do differently than most people? Im not sure... 16. How come the things that make you happy don’t make everyone happy? because were all just different people? 17. What one thing have you not done that you really want to do? travel really. I want to see more of the world  and cultures.

18. What’s holding you back? money.

19. Are you holding onto something you need to let go of? yeah my fathers death.

20. If you had to move to a state or country besides the one you currently live in, where would you move and why? maybe the UK? and Idk its different and i dont wanna live in the us. 21. Do you push the elevator button more than once? not really. 22. Would you rather be a worried genius or a joyful simpleton?  joyful 23. Why are you, you?  life experiences.

24. Have you been the kind of friend you want as a friend? I think i have but i do have a lot to work on. 25. Which is worse, when a good friend moves away, or losing touch with a good friend who lives right near you?  losing touch. it sucks when you can feel them slipping away right from your fingers and you cant change it. we live in a world where face time is a  thing so when someone moves it doesnt feel that much different. 26. What are you most grateful for? My mom 27. Would you rather lose all of your old memories, or never be able to make new ones? fuck. Never make new ones.  28. Is it possible to know the truth without challenging it first? idk..? 29. What is your greatest fear? Has it ever come true? Drowning. lol

30. Do you remember that time 5 years ago when you were extremely upset? Does it really matter now? it wouldve been either when my friend hurt me or when my dad had died. so yeah. 31. What is your happiest childhood memory?  vaca with dad

32. At what time in your recent past have you felt most passionate and alive? im not sure.. 33. If you haven’t achieved it yet, what do you have to lose? idk. 34. Have you ever been with someone, said nothing, and walked away feeling like you just had the best conversation ever?  Of course, sometimes the best people are the people you dont have to make up a lot of words. 35. Why do religions that support love cause so many wars? Cus humans. 36. Is it possible to know, without a doubt, what is good and what is evil? yes and no. we all have our set of morals. for sure murder is evil..i would hope everyone would agree. 37. If you just won a million dollars, would you quit your job?  yes. even tho i just got it but like i hate working LOL. 38. Would you rather have less work to do, or more work you actually enjoy doing?  more work i like to do 39. Do you feel like you’ve lived this day a hundred times before? yes.

40. When was the last time you marched into the dark with only the soft glow of an idea you strongly believed in? what

41. If you knew that everyone you know was going to die tomorrow, who would you visit today? i would try to see them all lol

42. Would you be willing to reduce your life expectancy by 10 years to become extremely attractive or famous? Of course LOL 

43. What is the difference between being alive and truly living? alive is just doing ur boring ass shit every day but living is like actually doing what u love lol 44. When is it time to stop calculating risk and rewards, and just go ahead and do what you know is right? you just know tbh 45. If we learn from our mistakes, why are we always so afraid to make a mistake? because we dont wanna look stupid or hurt others. depending on the mistake. 46. What would you do differently if you knew nobody would judge you? dress better and be more active with my social media career. 47. When was the last time you noticed the sound of your own breathing? right now 48. What do you love? Have any of your recent actions openly expressed this love? i love art, i always have. it just lets me express myself without feeling weird. 49. In 5 years from now, will you remember what you did yesterday? i will for sure b/c i just started working at this shit job so ill for sure remember this. i better not be here in 5 years or ill kms. 50. Decisions are being made right now. The question is: Are you making them for yourself, or are you letting others make them for you? myself but i always ask ppl for advice to help me. so both?

[thejosh1980]

Update #21 – 1 week at “The Ocean Shores Resort”

Update #21 – 1 week at “The Ocean Shores Resort”

A week ago we left quarantine in Adelaide!!!

It's been another week of mixed emotions, but I have to say, for the first time in months, they've been mostly on the positive side of things.

Last Tuesday, we left the hotel without too much hassle. They'd given us a basic breakfast the night before to have first thing and they called us down early; luckily we were ready and down the stairs we went. Before you know it, we were in the hotel reception taking our masks off!

Adelaide and South Australia are COVID free, so no masks, no problems.

The checkout was quick (the big bill comes in a few weeks!!), the staff were awesome and the police informative. They all understand that quarantine is not easy on anyone, and they were patient with our questions and worries. We had won the jackpot of quarantine hotels: Pullman Adelaide and the staff helped make our stay tolerable.

Jumped in a taxi (with masks on cause we really weren't sure yet how to behave in the outside world) and off to the airport. We had to leave the hotel by 07:30, because another bus of incoming “Covicts” were coming in that morning. Our flight was at 11:50 up to Brisbane, so it was yet another waiting game to check in and fly. But first... coffee! (we actually bought a coffee from a coffee shop! Amazing!! It's the small things...).

The flight was about about 2/3's full, no masks.

Landing in Brisbane we had to do a border check, show our papers, explain where we had been and all that. The check was there to stop anyone who may have COVID from coming in without quarantining. Each State has slightly different rules, and they do change from time to time, depending on hotspots and COVID numbers. Because the flight was from Adelaide and we left the hotel directly to the airport, we made sure we had no problems entering Brisbane (Queensland). We definitely didn't want any chance of another 14 day hotel stay!!!

Our original plan was to fly into the Gold Coast airport, which is only about 35 minutes from Mum, but there were no flights on our leaving day, so we had to fly into Brisbane (which is 2 hours from Mum's). My cousin picked us up (bloody legend!). We were hungry, and we went directly to Yatala pies. This was the moment I started to realize we were almost home. The taste of home! (Yatala Pies is a well known bakery south of Brisbane, a regular stop for many).

My cousin could drive us as far as the QLD/NSW border. Once there, we walked across the border and Dave picked us up on the other side. A little complicated, but sure enough, the plan worked.

The whole experience felt like something out of the movies. Not that it was all “Hollywood”. It was more like: I can't believe this is finally happening. I wasn't really in the moment. Yet.

As we were getting close to “The Ocean Shores Resort” (which is the name we have for my Mum's house) I still didn't feel calm...

Anyhow, we arrived, and if you've seen our IG or FB Story on the day, you'd know that when I knocked on the front door, we had actually surprised Mum (a little early), and she couldn't find the front door key to let us in!! So our reunion started off with a scream and eventually a laugh!!

Mum did cry, but we all expected her to cry more... ;) Honestly, I think we both had cried too much the past 2 months, it was no longer needed. It was all about joy and happiness.

After meeting and hugging Alex (some more tears) we entered the house to find Mum had a “welcome home” sign and our picture up on the walls (lots of me and Alex, can't go wrong with that!!).

It was surreal.

A quick house tour for Alex and we settled down. Lots of chatting and catching up to do, and a roast dinner!

We'd made it.

The next morning (Wednesday), a son's work is never done and I was up early to take Mum to school. She's part of the support unit inside the primary school, working with kids with Autism.

Even though her eyesight is deteriorating, Mum can still work. Driving a car; that's out of the question. Reading the “use by date” on a packet of chips is almost impossible. Keeping an eye on children in the playground, developing their social skills or helping them with their school work (considering the text is usually quite large and the pictures bold) Mum can still do really well.

I've learnt she has figured out ways to cope with her eyes. She has a great memory, so once she's told something, she can remember it really well (like recipes for cooking etc). She's still a keen bargain hunter when it comes to shopping. I enjoy learning that she's kept her life as close to “normal” as possible, making small changes to the bigger things to keep her independence.

But it's those small things that are hard to do alone, which is why I'm here...

After dropping Mum off, Alex and I spent the morning of our first full day in Brunswick Heads. This is the town I lived in from the mid 80's until late 90's. I went to primary school here, learned to surf here, and know the old names of the shops (the hair dressers is now a surf shop, the butcher's is a cafe, the ice cream shop is a real estate agent and the bank has recently closed). Lots of changes for me, lots of new things for Alex.

We also went down to the beach, the south wall of the Brunswick River, where the river meets the ocean. We watched some waves. Taking in the salt air (I don't think I ever realized how salty the air is here until now).

It was a relaxing day.

But I still wasn't quite “here” in my head and heart. Leaving Dresden back in July, only to be delayed for 7 weeks, then another 2 weeks in quarantine, was going to take sometime to overcome.

Time to pick up Mum from school... Home... Unpack a little, dinner, chatting and a little TV.

Thursday morning, it was time for another radio interview. To finish off the 3 part story with ABC North Coast Radio I did another live interview with Joanne Shoebridge. I'm always nervous doing these kinds of things, even though in the music world, I've had to do interviews, they were never quite as personal as this.

After we dropped Mum off at school Thursday morning, we drove up to the Cape Byron Lighthouse and luckily got a park up close to the top.

I wanted to introduce Alex to the area as much as I could, without overwhelming her. Brunswick Heads, Ocean Shores, Mullumbimby and Byron Bay all played a big part of my childhood, and I wanted her to at least know these villages a little bit as early as possible. We'd covered Brunswick Heads and Ocean Shores a little, so now it was time for Byron Bay.

Bring on the whale watching!!

Within minutes of leaving the car, we could see whales jumping out and swimming around the cape. It was a wonderful morning. I'm so glad Alex got to see them (in fact I can't remember the last time I saw whales so close to the shore). They migrate each year around September/October, so it was perfect timing.

It was a special day for Alex...

The sun was shining, the whales were in plain sight and the tourists were kind enough to stay away from Byron Bay. COVID does have its benefits. Fewer people in these tourist spots isn't always bad (although I am quite aware the economy is suffering. The borders are opening up next week and it'll be very busy then).

Back into Ocean Shores, picked up Mum from school. Home... Dinner.. Chatting... Some TV...

Friday was the first day we had to do “stuff” in regards to living here permanently, and that was banking. So after dropping mum off at work, we drove into Mullumbimby “The Biggest Little Town In Australia”. I went to high school here.

Basically Brunswick Heads and Mullumbimby are like Neustadt in Dresden. You can't walk down the street without seeing someone you know, stopping and chatting. It happened in Brunz the other day, I literally parked my car, and lo and behold an old high school friend came out of the video store to say hi... Or in Mullum, as we arrive at the bank I see an old friend who used to teach me rock n roll dancing (yeah, I can still cut a rug)... and even inside the bank, I said hi to a fella from my high school year, we hadn't seen each other since 1997.

It's a small world...

The banking took a bit longer than expected, after much back and forward we settled on our new bank accounts and how to arrange things going forward. While I've had an account here since I was very very young, I cancelled most of my stuff when I left in 2002, so now it was time to set up shop again, especially since I had my wife with me and we have a future to work towards...

We walked the street of Mullum, grabbed a coffee and we let the country hippy vibe soak in. Alex commented on how many folks don't wear shoes here and she can't believe how many new coffee shops there are for her to try (there's a lot more than when I was a kid).

Picked up Mum from school... School holidays for 2 weeks! Yippeee!!

Home... Dinner... Chatting... some TV...

Over the weekend we sorted out things around the house. Set up better internet Wifi around the house, the pool is in good condition after the winter sleep, cupboards got cleaned out and we unpacked and the car was washed (first time I've hand washed a car in over a decade!).

Sunday I watched Mark's live stream (from his front porch in upstate New York) and I felt inspired (he does that to me). So I am considering live streaming next week. I have a guitar and good internet, so why not? I just have to find time to practice ;) I'm thinking net Sunday evening here, which would be Sunday lunch time in Germany. If I don't get to it this Sunday, then maybe next Sunday... I'll keep you posted.

Overall the weather has been warm, often over 20 degrees. But the mornings are still quite chilly, with frosty dew on the golf course out back. It's not bad for coming out of winter...

Today, Monday, we went “up the coast”, to Tweed Heads.

First thing we tried to exchange my German license for a mandatory NSW (State) license, unfortunately I gotta wait for some back checks, no idea what I did 19 years ago in Melbourne, but they wanna check it out. So onwards to shopping...

Yes!!! We bought a coffee machine! Finally we can wake and with a press of a button get ourselves a cup of joe. It's the small things....

Helped mum with the grocery shopping. She knows her stuff. She knows where everything is in every shop, but sometimes she just needs me to reassure her what is actually written on the box or package!!!

So that's basically our first week...

We are settling in well. Alex and Mum get on like a house on fire. I often can't get a word in edgewise and I'm always outvoted!

I still miss Germany and I still miss Europe... (I always will). I miss a lot of the “past life”, but that's just cause Australia has moved on without me these past 18 years. Each day here I get a little closer to that homey feeling I used to have as a teenager (when I didn't know better).

In hindsight, the past 3 months wasn't too bad... We survived... But that's easy to say now...

When we were in the middle of it, it was really tough.

It was really hard packing up our lives into boxes. It was emotionally draining saying goodbye after goodbye to our wonderful friends. Playing my goodbye show was one of the musical highlights of my life, even if it was one of the saddest.

Then we were ready to leave...

As you all know, that didn't go according to plan.

That's when the really bad feelings crept in. You know it's one thing to know you gotta pack up and say goodbye to leave (you are prepared for that)... It's another when you're ready and the world says “nope, not yet”... and again and again that build up and let down was happening, and until the last 2 weeks in Germany, we had no idea why!

As some of you know, I'm not really good at spontaneity. I'm not good when the plan changes... It was tough... But...

When we took control of the situation and booked new flights, it helped a lot. We were back in control.

Quarantine was a difficult time, it got a little dark there. It brought with it, it's own set of challenges and a steep learning curve. I, for one, learnt a lot about pressure. I put too much pressure on myself. Since we arrived here, I have tried my best to relax more, in my own way at least. My to do lists are shorter...

Alex and I had already figured out how to survive the German lockdown, the packing up of our lives and clearing out the apartment. Then we had 2 months at her parents stuck in “limbo” and then 2 weeks stuck in a room together. Our marriage is really new, and we survived that without any damage to our relationship. Sure, we both have a few personal scars, but nothing a little love and tenderness wont fix. I'm proud of her, Alex has a lot of patience for me!

I'm really happy I am here to help Mum each day. Those small things will slowly become bigger things, but for now, it's great to be able to do “stuff” with her. That was always the plan, to be here in time, before things got really bad.

We've been posting often on our IG and FB stories, so I hope folks have seen the day to day happenings. I'm sure we'll continue with that, keeping you up to date visually.

I think I'll end these FB journals here, and switch over to Tumblr full time. The idea being that if you'd like to continue to read these long “new life” chronicles, I'll still post a link here when I do update there... Confused? Me too! ;)

Thanks everyone for your messages of support and love. We are very lucky, we have the best friends.... You guys rock! You're awesome! We love you.

Love

Josh and @dauntlesscoffee

[b00bconnoisseur]

60 questions for @not-my-brain

1. selfie.......Ugghhhh ok. Imma take one rn

Ok here u go (yes thats a bmth shirt)

2. what would you name your future kids?.....Ooo hmmm well when i was a kid i really liked the names disney, and mesiah. I didn't know at the time that mesiah was another name for god i think lol. I liked it cause of handlers mesiah. I still do. Ooo and maybe Tj too

3. do you miss anyone?......Yeah. My friends on Pinterest from a year ago. My friend lucas. Stan lee. Bob ross. My cousin who died from cancer some years ago. Snape. Sirius. Lupin. Tonks. Dobby. *continues to name every unfortunate death in hp*

4. what are you looking forward to?.......SE-YA next month!! Its the south eastern young adult festival at this college. You can have meet n greets with authors and alot of stuff its the besstttt

5. is there anyone who can always make you smile?......DEFINATELY. @dirtysocke @mysisterlooksforthisaccountsobye @cristal-kyd1280 @sammchenry my friend lucas and @septembersbloom. ^^

6. is it hard for you to get over someone?..... What like...romantically? Or like a death? If romantically uhhh idk it took over a couple weeks but im ok now. Ive never had another relationship so idk. If death oof yeah idk maybe. Ig it depends on how much i knew them idk. Like when my nanny (great grandma) died i was sad for days (is that alot?)

7. what was your life like last year?.....Sucky af. Still is. But the highlights of my life last year was getting and making friends on tumblr, going to the tøp concert and going to warped tour, volunteering at the library, going to seya and meeting some of my favorite authors, reading, changing and improving my art, listening to all the bands i listen to now, getting into more fandoms, going to a friends house for the first time

8. have you ever cried because you were so annoyed?.......Yes lol. Some years ago when i couldn't find smtn id be so annoyed and pissed id start crying. I dont now but still lol

9. who did you last see in person?.......Hm ig family doesn't count....? Wait do u mean a friend? If so uhh my friends rebekah, anika, and Judah at a TAB meeting at the library sometime last month.

10. are you good at hiding your feelings?......I think so? Like i mean I can hide whenever i get my....time of the month from my mom (talking abt stuff like that with her makes me uncomfortable) and i hid a breakup. And other p big stuff too. So imma say yeah

11. are you listening to music right now?........*pops on earbuds after reading this* yee im listening to bitch lasagna by pewdiepie xD (do i have the best spotify playlist or what?)

12. what is something you want right now?.......To hug @mysisterlooksforthisaccountsobye but SOMEONE has to live so far away

13. how do you feel right now?........Happy that my earbud still works cause they got washed in the wash yesterday....oops. Its not my fault. I told my dad to remind me to take it out of my jacket pocket before they threw it in but noooooo he forgot

14. when was the last time someone of the opposite sex hugged you?.......Uhhhhh fuck idk it was probably from my lil 4 yr old bro sometime last week. Other than him (hes my favorite sibling) i dont let them hug me too much

15. personality description.......Nerdy. Fangirl. "Emo". Tomboy. Hotsause obsessed. Book lover. Music lover. Black. Blue. Harry potter. Introvert. Fall. Sports. Values friendship. Loyal. Uhhhh i cant think of much lol

16. have you ever wanted to tell someone something but you didn’t?.......*sigh* yes. Yes yes yes. Theres some things abt me, or my life really, that i havent told anyone on here or my irl friends that i sooooo want to so bad but i haven't cause i feel like they'd feel bad and pity me and i don't want that

17. opinion on insecurities........I dont really understand this one. Everyones insecure abt something. Is this askin like if i think its ok or not? I say its ok. Im insecure about literally everything about me. My face. My personality. My socialness. My art. What i do. What i say. Basically my whole body. The things i feel good abt are my books, music taste, and my friends (ily fuckers)

18. do you miss how things were a year ago?.........Hmm this time around a year ago....idk its sorta the same but all the stuff i mentioned abt my year from last year didn't happen yet so nah tho my life sucks rn its better than this time last year

19. have you ever been to New York?........Nooo but i want too soo baddd i wanna visit @septembersbloom !! Im coming for ya soon gramps *does the eye watching thing* my dads been to nyc before tho cause he does construction and he had a concrete job to do there. It was a 23 hr drive for him

20. what is your favourite song at the moment?........Uhhh idk!!! So hard! Maybe.....the whole thats the spirit album by bmth ;)

21. age and birthday?.....15 yrs of age and September 27th 2003 (whats yours brainy? I'll put it on my calendar)

22. description of crush......Its weird idk im not sure if its a genuine crush or not but uh....They like hp :).Thats all u get

23. fear(s).......Losing my best friend @dirtysocke and my other friends. Death. Failure. Momo chasing after me then killing me slowly keeping my eyes open to look her dead in the eyes while i die

24. height......5'6 call me short and I'll fuck u up with THIS *pulls out trusty potato peeler named now steve* dont test me boi

25. role model......Hhhhhhhh so many! But uh gosh one of them is @superraedizzle (youtuberrrr) and vexx and bob ross and da vinci and aaaaaaa so many

26. idol(s)......First person that immediately comes to mind is @sammchenry cause he's super cool and he's really nice and his art's reallyyy good (if u havent seen it w-w-what are u even doin with your life?) And he has a great sense of humor and *continues to ramble about why samms the best*

27. things i hate.......Dabs. Transphobes. Homophobic ppl. Basically any hate on the lgbtq+ community. Bullies. The ship starker. Umbridge. Snape haters

28. i’ll love you if….....U you'll eat pizza, draw, and rp harry potter with mee

29. favourite film(s)......Fantastic beasts. Every hp film. Twilight. The maze runner 1-2. The hunger games. Spiderman homecoming. Kingsman: secret service. Into the spideyverse tho i havent seen it yet

30. favourite tv show(s)......Inkmasterrrrr. B99. The mick. The middle. Uhhh idk mostly ink master xD

31. 3 random facts........Ive never had shrimp. I had a beta fish for over a year once. Im eating pizza crust rn

32. are your friends mainly girls or guys?.......G i r l s. I have all girl friends irl and one boy. And on tumblr it seems like i just meet girls? Likei agree with @cristal-kyd1280 its like alot more gals then dudes here. But i do have some guy friends on here too. But mostly girls

33. something you want to learn.......TO DRAW ANATOMY DAMMIT

34. most embarrassing moment........Every moment of my lifes an embarrassing moment. Idk of i can pick a "most" embarrassing one. But one time i i sent my crush (now ex bf) a hey fuckface and like some hearts or whatever for an ask game that meant like "i have a crush on u" "youre adorable" etc and said Hewo but i did it all anonymously. But he confronted me askin if i sent it cause im the only person he knows that actually says hewo lol. Then later on i finally admitted i really liked him and well y'all know the story after i think. Unless you're new

35. favourite subject.......A R TTTT OFC

36. 3 dreams you want to fulfill?........meet my friends on tumblr. Get into mtsu (college i wanna go to) and study art. And go skydiving

37. favourite actor/actress........favorite actor uhhhhhh probably thomas brodie sangster or tom felton and my favorite actress? Hmmm idk maybe evanna lynch (luna lovegood)

38. favourite comedian(s).......probably kevin hart lol he's p funny

39. favourite sport(s)........basketballllllll and football

40. favourite memory........uhhhhh idk?? One oh my favorite memories was when we went to see tøp in concert

41. relationship status.....single as a pringle

42. favourite book(s)......harry potter and the order of the pheonix. Harry potter and the half blood prince. Simon vs the homo sapiens agenda. Divergent. Maze runner. Twilight. Fangirl. Fallen. Red queen

43. favourite song ever.......TOO HARD DONT MAKE ME CHOOSEEEEEE

44. age you get mistaken for.........16 and 17 sometimes lol

45. how you found out about your idol........i was watching someone on yt and superraedizzle always poped up in my feed and my mom turned on one of her vids cause she always saw her vids too now ive seen most of em i love her. Id heard of vexx but never watched him and i was watching a collab from anthony miller art and shrimpy and i checked out shrimpys channel and was lookin at comments and alot of ppl said his art is like vexxs so i checked out vexx. At first i was like eh ok. Now i cant click fast enough when he posts a vid. And i actually fpund out about bob ross from my grandpa on jan 20 2017 when trump was getting sworn in or whatever. We turned on pbs and my grampa told me to look and bob ross was on and i was IN. I loved it. I even started watching full episodes on YouTube of the joy of painting after that. Wonderful man. My first painting i ever did i think was when i followed one of his tutorials xD (i didnt know it was popular at the time)

46. what my last text message says......."ok your turn"

47. turn ons.....uhh nerds ig idk um book lovers, music lovers, art lovers, potterheads, idk and nice ppl

48. turn offs......jerks. Homophobia. Idk ig whatever i said in things i hate

49. where i want to be right now......uhhhh idk wait didn't i already answer this? Ok this ones different ig so uhh with my friend lucas

50. favourite picture of your idol.....oh shit...favorite? Idk xD i have a fave of vexx but not of rae or bob. But heres pics of them any way

51. starsign......a libraaaaa boiii

52. something i’m talented at......drawing and speed reading. Thats about it lol. Oh and procrastina

53. 5 things that make me happy.......ooooo art, my friends here on tumblr, books, harry potter, and music ^^

54. something thats worrying me at the moment.....if my friend thinks im being annoying

55. tumblr friends......hhhhh so manyyyyyy. @dirtysocke @mysisterlooksforthisaccountsobye @cristal-kyd1280 @chinesewaffles2 @kingantlion @queen-baelin @sammchenry @septembersbloom and more

56. favourite food(s)......green beans, pepperoni pizza, and vanilla madelines

57. favourite animal(s).......basically any reptile. Puppies. Cats. Any animal really but my #1 are snakes

58. description of my best friend.....well she's a tiny bean (5 feet) and she has dark hair, she wears glasses, she doesnt take shit, she's in love with Josh dun, she's awesome, funny, nice (YES youre nice jackie) and shes the best friend ive ever had. Oh. And she has a weird obsession with spaghetti

59. why i joined tumblr.......well i heard abt it on Pinterest over a year ago but didnt want it. Then @mrfastbass-deactivated20181231 on DeviantArt said he got tumblr so i made one then followed him and figured id just post art and that's it cause i thought tumblr was boring as hell when i first got it. Now im p much obsessed with it

60. ask me anything you want.......go ahead brainy shoot. Give me smtn good

[steamishot]

moody

i woke up with major back pains today, which never happens. i feel like an old fart. i think it’s because matt and i had an extremely lazy weekend where we stayed in and laid down the majority of the time to the point of breaking our backs lol. not necessarily my ideal weekend, but he had just gotten off a week of night shifts & needed to relax, and it’s cold outside. 

my family celebrated lunar new year with me on facetime last week. lunar new year means way more to my family than any american holiday, so it kinda sucked to not be there with them. matt and i did our usual rounds in chinatown on saturday and this time, got to try the well known dim sum spot - jing fang. although it was good, LA hands down has superior asian food (or perhaps our taste is biased). i drank my favorite crack HK milk tea from yin ji chang fen yesterday and today. although i love the taste, its also highly caffeinated (seems moreso than my latte), and sends me into a moody spiral where i feel depressed and sad for no reason. i’m in that slump right now and my back pain isn’t helping. 

i feel all sorts of weird - wanting to do everything and nothing at the same time. trying a bit of everything but not really excelling at anything. i tend to get to a point where i feel content because i’m too lazy too improve, or things get difficult. now that i recognize it, i’ll try to keep moving forward regardless and stay disciplined. all this while feeling so disconnected from the world and people in general.

coffee: my favorite bean that i’ve tried so far is stumptown’s ethiopian single source. we’ve finished that and stumptown’s hairbender (12 oz bags). i signed up for a coffee bean subscription from stumptown (roaster’s pick) and should be receiving my package soon. it’s been awesome getting to make lattes/espresso/americanos whenever i want. latte art hasn’t been easy, but i’ve learned that it’s okay not to use up all the milk that is frothed (even though it’s a waste). 

running: matt got me NB running shoes for my birthday. the fit was a bit too small, so i went and exchanged it for brooks glycerins. it’s my go to shoes for the gym now. now that i’m vaccinated (although still a bit paranoid), there’s no reason for me not to run consistently at the gym. my friend B invited me to do a 50 mile month challenge which i have gladly accepted for march. 

cooking: amex has been giving really awesome deals this year because traveling has come to a halt. one of the perks we received was $50 off $50 x3 for home chef meals. combined with the 50% off healthcare worker discount, we basically got 6 meals (12 servings) for free and will have about another 16 upcoming servings for free. i had thought about doing a subscription like this when i first moved here. the meals have been pretty good/healthy! normally when i cook, matt doesn’t know how to portion control and tends to overeat. now our meals are what one person is supposed to eat xD. although there’s a lot of plastic that goes to waste, i’m also glad that we get a variety of foods without having leftovers of ingredients. each meal was so easy to make, and took 30 min or less.

youtube: i was inspired to get a gimbal after my uncle showed me his. another amex perk is $50 off $50 from best buy. i used it to purchase the DJI OM 4 to make more videos with my phone. as of now, i have uploaded 9 videos. they’re nowhere near perfect and were edited on imovie LOL, but i’m slowly learning and uploading as i go to see my progress. the last video i made (spicy noodle challenge) was edited using adobe premiere pro. i enjoyed making it and watching it, but there’s still a long way to go. 

valentines day: valentines didn’t seem very important to me this year as we’re already living together. however, i was envious when i saw traditional gestures of romance - i.e. guys holding flowers/balloons on the subway and romantic IG posts about valentines day. matt bought a red purse for me that i really wanted a few weeks ago and said it was my vday present. i thought it was super sweet at the time, but when i received it, i realized that i didn’t need the purse lol. matt never really bought in to consumerist holidays - to him, it’s only worth buying if the product is on sale/a good deal. now he’s changing to be more consumerist. and oddly enough, i’m becoming more like him where i’m starting to think spending money because you’re obligated to on a holiday is kinda silly. 

portfolio: still a work in progress. still helping my dietitian friend out - this time increasing my prices. i’m such a procrastinator but will definitely need to add “applying to jobs” as a new habit!

relationship: sometimes it’s hard to isolate what exactly is causing moodiness or unhappiness. for example, after a week of nights shifts, matt became easily irritated AND sensitive. probably not the best tactic, but to reduce my own stress, i combat his aggression with my aggression. he hasn’t been doing the best academically and has failed several of his past exams. this shouldn’t be the case because he was on easier rotations and had no excuse not to study. however, most of the test takers “cheat” (google stuff while taking the exam); he was too tired to cheat this this past time and took an L. it’s been difficult knowing that i’m doing so much in our home life to free up time and energy for him - and he’s still not doing well sigh. my reddit friend showed me a video from SNL about “pelotaunt” where the trainer taunts you into working harder. positive reinforcement does NOT work for matt - so i’m trying to use similar taunting tactics instead hahaha

[preciousnerd]

A “should we know us a little better” tag
RULES: you must answer these 92 statements and tag 20 people 
Tagged by @lil-loki THE LAST: 
 1. Drink: mountain dew 
2. Phone call: my dad whoops  
3. Text message: kasey!! 
 4. Song you listened to: uuhhhh Youre Mine by Lola Marsh 5. Time you cried: idk probably like,,3 days ago? 
6. Dated someone twice: yes, with multiple people but also with the guy I’m with now!  
7. Kissed someone and regretted it: maaany times lma o 8. Been cheated on: yes multiple times  9. Lost someone special: of course, who hasn’t? 
 10. Been depressed: lmao yeah  11. Gotten drunk and thrown up: nope!  LIST 3 FAVORITE COLORS:
 12-14: seafoam green, pastelier blues ? and uuhh,,purple because it reminds me of kasey  IN THE LAST YEAR HAVE YOU:
 15. Made new friends: uhhh ye s I met Lana and Ty through our mutual hate of Kaleb!!  
16. Fallen out of love: nope I dont think so  
17. Laughed until you cried: probably pft 18. Found out someone was talking about you: in a bad way,,? Ig I did last night??? Idk I dont pay a lot of attention to that stuff  19. Met someone who changed you: in the past year,,no I haven’t  20. Found out who your friends are: I guess i found that out earlier than this past year so,,,no?  
21. Kissed someone on your Facebook list: Cody isnt in my facebook list smh so no GENERAL: 
22. How many of your Facebook friends do you know in real life: uh,,,two of them i think?? kasey and my sister??  
23. Do you have any pets: two dogs atm but ive had more in the past  
24. Do you want to change your name: yes a million times yes
 25. What did you do for your last Birthday: uh nothing? We went to dinner downtown and ate cake and opened presents in my sisters dorm room  
26. What time did you wake up: at like 12:45 whoops  
27. What were you doing at midnight last night: uuhhh either watching youtube or playing gay wars with reb  
28. Name something you can’t wait for: for my boyfriend to not be be going through absolute hell in his life  
29. When was the last time you saw your mom: like a minute ago she walked in and talked to me about who was playing a new autistic doctor in a show  30. What is one thing you wish you could change in your life: i wish i could change how codys life was going rn!!!  
31. What are you listening right now: nothing other than the distant sound of The Chew playing in the living room  32. Have you ever talked to a person named Tom: no? i dont think so 
33. Something that is getting on your nerves: when I dont think before I act and it causes other people to get hurt  
34. Most visited Website: idk probably youtube or hangouts  35. Mole/s: u  h none  36. Mark/s: some single lonely freckles on my arms,legs,feet, and hands, a really dark birthmark on my back, a lot of scars on my legs and arms and hands, stretch marks on my back and i,,,think thats it???  37. Childhood dream: idk small me probably wanted a husband/boyfriend and to not work and be a stay at home mom because thats what i grew up thinking i needed to be but that has changed lm ao 38. Hair color: uh its naturally dark brown but rn the shaved part is brown and the long part is blonde  
39. Long or short hair: definitely short but the longer part is very floofy :> 
40. Do you have a crush on someone: yeye my boyfriend 
41. What do you like about yourself: uh?? i really like my hair?? thats the main thing ig, and my hip/collar bones are nice  42. Piercings: lmao no never again 
43. Bloodtype: who actually knows this about themselves  44. Nickname: u h idk my sister calls me Arooooon (pronounced like,,maroon), some people call me hecker, i think my new nickname for loki was turdsnot, or we could change it too rufus, and kasey and my boyfriend call me a bunch of cute things like hun or babe or whatever but idk its hard to keep track of 45. Relationship status: taken 
46. Zodiac: aries 
 47. Pronouns: they/them 48. Favorite TV Show: hmmm..probably like,,jojos even though thats an anime  
49. Tattoos: i dont have any but i want them real bad  
50. Right or left hand: left for writing and eating stuff but i use my right for some things ?  
51. Surgery: havent gone through surgery and the thought scares me  52. Piercing: smh i see you asking double questions  
53. Sport: not a sporty person but im interested in going into dance?? especially contemporary  55. Vacation: at this point its always to Texas to see my bf and best friend  56. Pair of trainers: what does this even mean?? shoes?? favorite shoes??? i really like my heels ig??? ? ?? ?  ?

MORE GENERAL: 
57. Eating: i was eating cinnamon toast crunch but i really want a rice bowl from a kobe place near me dfjfk 58. Drinking: mountain dew lmao 59. I’m about to: probably watch youtube and talk to kasey  
61. Waiting for: death?? but also my babe  62. Want: to move back to texas bluh  63. Get married: depends on who im with when i need to make that decision but im open to it and id definitely get married to cody in the future if he wanted  
64. Career: i dont really know anymore, body painter, special effects artist, journalist??artist??  something different?? idk! !  WHICH IS BETTER?: 
65. Hugs or kisses: uuhhh kisses but only with my bf  66. Lips or eyes: hmm..depends?? both are nice  67. Shorter or taller: both have their perks especially when dating either of them, like with cody he can pick me up and carry me around and i have to stand on my toes to kiss him and i love it but with shorter people they can sit in your lap and you can rest your head on theirs and bl uh idk bu t atm taller because i just want to be Held  
68. Older or younger: uuhh older cause im real young anyways but not like,,,too much older yknow,, 
70. Nice arms or nice stomach: uhh????? ?i dunno??? both are nice ig but neither are important to me?? ? 
71. Sensitive or loud: i dont know what this,,means?? like in a person??? it doesnt matter ig both have their perks and downsides to me 
72. Hook up or relationship: relationship, i cant stand the thought of hooking up with someone  
73. Troublemaker or hesitant: again, both are good and bad  HAVE YOU EVER: 
74. Kissed a stranger: not a complete stranger no but i wouldnt do it again  75. Drank hard liquor: lmao no ive only had a sip of a frozen daiquiri once  76. Lost glasses/contact lenses: i havent lost them to a point ive never found them but i slept with my glasses in my bed and couldnt find them for like an hour and cried about it after looking because i hated the feeling of not being able to see and it frustrated me a lot (this sounds like it happened when i was a small child but no it only happened like a year and a half ago)  77. Turned someone down: lmao yes ofc if i said yes to everyone who wanted to date me i would jump around so much and id hate it  78. Sex in the first date: uuhhhh questionably yes? but we had been dating for a long time before that it was just our first proper “go out and see each other” date cause we are long distance yknow  79. Broken someones heart: whoops yeah oh well  
80. Had your heart broken: yeyeye 81. Been arrested: lmAO n o 
82. Cried when someone died: yes  
83. Fallen for a friend: uuh yeah i guess thats what happened with jennie? but i wouldnt say i completely fell for her, ive only been in love once so idk, but i used to become interested in friends DO YOU BELIEVE IN:
 84. Yourself: lmao no not at all 85. Miracles: yes and no? but to keep it simple ill just stick with no  86. Love at first sight: uhhh i dont really know tbh, but i dont think i do 
87. Santa Claus: no :< 
88. Kiss in the first date: depends?? most of the time no tho 
89. Angels: dont believe in god so i dont believe in angels either whoops  OTHER:
 90. Current best friends name: kasey and cody 91. Eyecolor: brown 
92. Favorite movie(s): The Little Prince is one of my favorites, Song of the Sea, Moana, just a lot of animated kids movies are really g o od man  TAGGED: idk ig,,, @demonicfox15 ? sure you can do it kasey why not  this took me,,,so freaking long dkfmkmds

[zillowcondo]

An Ideal Day in Bend, Oregon: TSLL’s Itinerary

With Labor Day weekend coming up, I know many Oregonians will be venturing to Bend for one last summer hurrah. As well, whenever you might have the opportunity to visit our central Oregon outdoor, foodie, health-focused, beer-making, dog-loving community haven, I wanted to share with you a simple list of ideas when you begin creating an itinerary.

While currently we are inundated with smoke from lightening caused forest fires and will most likely be for a few, if not more than a few, days, perusing through the many images I have captured over the past two years reminded me of the beauty that exists nearly everywhere I turn. Whether it is out on the water, sitting down for a cup of coffee, strolling along the paths at Drake Park, spending time viewing a small indie film in a boutique theater or savoring the delicious fare at the many locally owned, family run restaurants, some of which have been recognized by the James Beard association, there are many simple, beautiful and memorable ways to spend your time in my new hometown. And I am more than happy to share what I’ve discovered.

If I had to plan an ideal day in Bend, from beginning to end, sundown to beyond sunset, below are the twelve activities I would put on my itinerary. None of them are overly extravagant, but each are activities I appreciate having the opportunity to experience, visit, and/or savor in Bend.

Morning

1. A walk in nature with my boys

Nearly every day begins with a walk with my boys, Norman and Oscar. With nature just outside my backdoor, as a doggie mama I feel as though I am giving my dogs the best life I could possibly give them. Whether on a leash while walking multiple miles on preserved trails along a river or allowing them to be off-leash at designated expansive dog parks around Deschutes County, their smile when they see where we I am driving warms my heart.

While many people run, or bike here in Bend, walking has always been my preferred work-out of choice, and very rarely do I walk the same trail or path two days in a row. Here and here are two resources to find a trail or path that suits your taste and location in Central Oregon.

~View all of the images captured with #tsllmynorman and #tsllmyoscar while walking in #tsllbend on @thesimplyluxuriouslife‘s Instagram feed.

  2. Summer: Stand-Up Paddle Boarding with Norman (and sometimes Oscar); Winter: cross country skiing with both of my boys

Quite frequently this summer I found myself both walking early in the morning followed by a jaunt on the paddle board before the heat of the day set in. This pattern was partly prompted by  because Oscar is getting older and preferring to stay on solid ground, so I wanted to make sure he received his daily exercise with the walk, but also because I didn’t want to pass up the beautifully warm, yet still crisp, mornings on my board.

Norman has become quite the little SUP pup and hops on like a pro which makes it all the more exciting to get out onto the water (you can see all of our ventures on the water on Instagram with #tsllsup). If you are looking to rent a paddle board, you can pick one up at a handful of different locations, often right at the river: Tumalo Creek Paddle & Canoe, Parks & Rec rents at RiverBend Park and many more locations as well (click here for the entire list). And don’t forget to visit the high lakes with your board. Below is an image on the day of the Total Solar Eclipse on Hosmer Lake.

But summer doesn’t last all year and as many of you know, Bend is known for the snow and skiing on Mt. Bachelor. While I am not a down hill skier, I do love to take my dogs cross country skiing or go by myself at a handful of different parks along the Cascade Lakes Highway headed to Mt. Bachelor. Usually, I head up in the morning to make the most of the snow, and then return down the hill for a leisurely rest of the day. (Here is a list of cross country skiing destinations to check out.)

3. Breakfast and a Cuppa Tea/Coffee at a Bakery 

After finishing the daily workout, on an ideal day, a stop into a local bakery is never a bad idea. With so many delicious bakeries to choose from (last summer I shared a post detailing a handful of the best bakeries in Bend based on my tastebuds’ first-hand experience), you will find something delicious to nibble on as well as scrumptious coffee (my favorite place for coffee is Backporch Coffee Roasters which was voted Best Coffee in Bend this year).  And for tea, many of the bakeries serve Metolius Artisan Tea which is local and offers a quality sipping experience

~shown above: Sparrow Bakery, the Village Baker~ 

~Backporch Coffee Roasters on Newport Market Ave.~

4. Visit a Farmers Market

Beginning in June and running through September and October (depending upon which market), the farmers markets in Bend are quite abundant as purveyors come from the Willamette Valley and across central and eastern Oregon to share their produce. You can view an abundance of images I captured this past summer at my three favorite spots in this post as well as discover how to make the most of your time at a farmers market.

My advice: arrive when they begin as the best produce goes quickly, but don’t worry, all of the produce is spectacular. And if you simply want fresh, local produce without having to go to one of the once-a-week markets, stop by Paradise Produce on Galveston on the west side.

5. Pop into a Book Shop

I adore bookshops, as I know many of TSLL readers do as well. Much like a big hug you can step into and find quiet refuge, visiting a locally owned bookshop is a sweet outing entirely by itself. Supporting independently owned bibliophile sanctuaries is vital, and while it can be tempting to go home and purchase the book from Amazon (I too am guilty of this from time to time), buying a book, sitting down and enjoying a hot cup of tea or coffee and making connections can go along way if we all did something to show our appreciation on a regular basis. Perhaps look at your purchase as a subscription or a form of mini rent to keep your favorite book destination open.

I was especially grateful when Roundabout Books opened less than a year ago in Northwest Bend and I had the opportunity to introduce readers to the owner in this post as well as share a few more pics from my many wanderings through the shelves.

Dudley’s Bookshop Cafe is also a wonderful, cozy bookstore located in its prime downtown location. With a comfy couch upon which I have sat more than a few times and enjoyed conversation and tea with a friend as well as a work room upstairs set amongst used books, the espresso is delicious, the treats are scrumptious, and you are centrally located to enjoy many other lovely boutiques while downtown.

6. Stop into Iron Horse Antiques

Don’t be fooled by the old, western exterior; Iron Horse Antiques is a treasure chest waiting for customers who have the patience and curiosity to step inside and find exactly what they didn’t know they wanted. I have stopped in a few times for props on projects, teapots for work or at home and while I do not spend more than $30 or $50 dollars, I always find something unique. Located just a block away from one of my favorite restaurants for dinner (shared below in #11), you’ll find Iron Horse Antiques in the Old Bend District. (If you’re viewing this post on Wednesday August 30th, check out TSLL’s IG Stories to see more video inside the shop.)

7. Enjoy a light, delicious lunch at Jackson’s Corner, Parilla, Spork, the Village Baker or Chow

Any one of these destinations will delight the foodie that resides within you. From classic American fare to globally-conscious cuisine, mouth-watering tacos and burritos and traditional sandwiches amped up with thoughtful flavorful details, no reservations are needed, just step inside and pick up, dine in or outside and enjoy a boost to carry you through the second half of your day.

~Spork‘s menu, located on Newport Ave on the west side~

~The Village Baker, located on both the west and east side, try their sandwiches. My favorite is the turkey with strawberry salsa.~

~Parilla’s beloved fish tacos – AAAAmmmazing; two locations – east and west~

~Jackson’s Corner: fresh bread (my favorite baguette in town), pizza (the thin, crust is just to my liking), classic American comfort food; two locations: east and west)~

8. Walk in Drake Park and the Old Bend District

If you’re downtown, be sure to stroll through Drake Park located along the Deschutes River and what is called Mirror Pond. In the fall, as you see below, the colors are exquisite, and as well in the spring with the copious amounts of maple and other deciduous trees full of blossoms.

  9. Enjoy an Afternoon Break at your vacation rental

If you’re anything like me, you will need some time to rest and recharge before finishing the day. With the many vacation rentals in Bend, enjoy the outdoors by simply stepping onto your porch, patio or out into the yard. I have a hammock in my backyard, so often in the afternoon I find myself taking a rest swinging out in the fresh air, listening to the birds.

  Evening

10. If staying in and cooking at home, visit Newport Market for your gourmet goods

The bounty of grocery stores and market in Bend for the small size of under 90,000 people is a food-lovers mecca. And while we do have Whole Foods, Trader Joe’s and Market of Choice as well as Locavore and finally the traditional Safeway, Albertsons and Fred Meyers, we also have something exclusively in Bend that you won’t find anywhere else (that’s redundant on purpose): Newport Market.

If you’ve ever been to New York City’s Upper West Side and stepped into Zabar’s, you will feel right at home at Newport Market. No, it isn’t a kosher deli, but it is small, the shelves are close together, and the selection is phenomenonal for the minimal space they inhabit. Yes, the prices are a little high, but for quality seafood (considering we are not close to the ocean), wonderful wines (I trust every selection and have yet to be disappointed), a sushi bar, deli options, even cooking utensils and supplies (they sell Le Creuset) as well as locally made food such as Bontà gelato. The service is friendly and on Friday be sure to stop by the deli for the once weekly made coconut shrimp and prime rib.

11. Have dinner at a special place

If you do want to dine out for a lovely, palette pleasuring experience, make reservations especially at Ariana’s (use OpenTable – they only allow one month in advance, but you will need it, and request to not be placed by the backdoor) and it is recommended highly at both The French Market and Tim Garling’s Jackalope Grill. 

A few weeks ago I wrote a review of the newly opened French Market which sources its menu from local, seasonal produce, as does both Jackalope and Ariana’s. The Jackalope Grill is sometimes overlooked because of the name, but you will not want to miss dining here. The French-trained chef Garling offers new American fare that is served in a traditional dining setting. With both indoor and courtyard seating (see here), I often felt I was dining in New York City with the cement walls and globe style lighting.

Ariana’s Restaurant has been recognized by the James Beard association and with good reason. The white tablecloth service, the unique and unexpected offerings all the while catering to the new approaches to classic European dishes, be sure to have a look at my review here. Only open Tuesday through Saturday beginning at 5pm, make a reservation now and it will be worth the wait.

~The French Market, located in the Old Bend district~

~Ariana’s Restaurant, located on NW Galveston~

~Jackalope Grill, located in downtown Bend~ 

12. Watch an Independent film at the Tin Pan Theater

To conclude the evening, instead of heading to the Old Mill Movie Theaters, stop into a small boutique theater in downtown Bend, the Tin Pan Theater. As you can see from the images below, there are only five rows with either five or six seats each. The door opens 30 minutes before show time, and you cannot reserve your tickets in advance, so be sure to show up early. The films are often independent or foreign that don’t typically show in the large theaters.

The prices for tickets, food and drinks (wine and beer as well as free water) are far lower than what we have become accustomed to, and the atmosphere is quite memorable and comfortable.

Having viewed two different films at the Tin Pan Theater (Paris Can Wait and Lost in Paris), one filled up and one met half of the capacity, I cannot wait to go again.

And now to drift to dream, savoring the goodness of the simple way of living, even if for a day in the city of Bend, Oregon. So often we feel we need to make grand plans to ensure a most memorable time in a destination away from home, but often it is by experiencing the common events (dining, bookshop visiting, sipping a cup of coffee) in a new setting with new people and different energy that can create a powerful experience to remind us of the beauty of the everyday gifts around us. Perhaps your town is just has lovely if seen through a tourist’s eyes.

While I have the good fortunate to have each of these experiences available to me year-round, it is my hope I never take them for granted because having such luxuries was not such the case before I arrived, and I feel very much like an adult in a candyland of riches.

If you have any questions about an upcoming trip to Bend, be sure to check out my City Guide which I am regularly updating, as well as view all of the posts specifically highlighting my favorite destinations in Bend (many of which were included in this post, but not all). You are also welcome to email me (info@thesimplyluxuriouslife.com), and I will do my best to answer and offer suggestions you might enjoy.

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