#if you want to dm about it you can like. i dont think i explained myself super well
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dandyshucks · 10 months ago
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okay its going under a readmore bc its messy and a lot, i'll try to keep it succinct though. CW for some discussion of the ongoing g.enocide and things around that topic
so one of the friends is someone I've really respected and admired because they're a very intelligent well-spoken and kind-hearted individual. i've really been impressed with how they think about things and with their ability to write really fantastic essays (that they often share with this friend group because they're in school and enjoy sharing their work with us because a lot of us are interested in the things they write about). about a year ago, this person went through the process of converting to j.udaism and we were all very excited (and continue to be happy) for them. they've been really happy with the process and the community they've found and it's been really good for them.
however! this person has since stated they are a z.ionist! and they've said that it just means that j.ewish people should live in i.srael, it doesn't mean they support the i.df or what is happening in p.alestine currently. but I'm just... baffled at how they can think that non-p.alestinians occupying the country could EVER be done peacefully. it has ALWAYS been colonization. it was never going to be done in a peaceful manner.
do j.ewish people deserve a safe place to exist? absolutely! but I do not think, ESPECIALLY now, that that safe place can ever be located in p.alestine. I'm not the most educated or well-read individual, I've done a bit of reading over the past few months but my memory is shoddy and I consistently forget almost everything I've read, but as far as I can tell, this has been a non-peaceful occupation (...can occupation ever really be done peacefully in reality? i doubt it.) from the very beginning. p.alestinians were being kicked out of their houses from the start.
and to add onto the messiness of this all, I am the only i.ndigenous person in the entire group. I am the only one coming at this from an i.ndigenous perspective. and because of my perspective, I am ALWAYS going to be on the side of the population that first lived and existed in a place. i am always on the side of l.and back, i am always on the side of the first peoples. anything less would be essentially agreeing with colonization.
so it is just incredibly uncomfortable to be the only i.ndigenous person in this group while the rest of the group has discussed and expressed sympathy with this person for holding self-professed z.ionist beliefs (I do not believe this person has done the right reading to fully understand what they are saying, which is so strange because they are usually so good about educating themself). and I feel like if I try to say anything to argue or simply question this person, I'm going to rock the boat too much and make Everyone uncomfortable and the entire thing will blow up and fall apart around me. so my options seem to be either: a) say something, b) say nothing and stay in the group, or c) say nothing and quietly leave the group. none of which feel like good options!
and it sucks so much because there are people I genuinely do like in this group, and I've liked this one person and respected them since I met them, but they're really .... showing themself to be an unsafe person at the end of the day. I keep feeling like maybe I'm not seeing something or maybe I'm missing something, but I've looked at this from multiple angles and while I do absolutely see where they're coming from and even sympathise with some of it, I disagree with them on a fundamental level.
(also it seems really fucked up for them to be newly converted to j.udaism and endorsing what is essentially colonization and lowkey ignoring the fact that PEOPLE ARE BEING GENOCIDED RIGHT NOW so maybe we should not be discussing "but where are all the j.ewish ppl going to live :(" until the bullets and bombs stop at the very least(????????), while I've been indigenous and dealing with the consequences of attempted (and still ongoing!) genocide and colonization my entire life)
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skyllion-uwu · 1 year ago
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Am I nauseous because I'm hungry or because I triggered myself last night
#my stomach hurts and i need to eat but the idea of doing that is. ack#and i cant tell my parents why because id have to unpack so much spontaneously#like id have to explain i was on the internet before they let me make an account and that i didnt tell them when i was getting those dms#and how its basically ruined any neutrality i had towards sex because ill be fine and then BAM!#everyone else is 12 year old me and im an adult and im my abuser and im going to hurt them if i keep talking about this#just because it was only words doesnt mean it fucked everything up forever. i know back then i was aroace but didnt have the words#but i sincerely think id be just sex neutral if it wasnt for that fucking asshole and now i think about sex for too long and get sick#and i didnt say anything because i thought they were my friend and i dont know if they were 11 like they said they were or not either way#its just. im getting so much off my chest here i wish i could go back in time and tell myself to block after that first message#and i didnt say anything after i realized because i wasnt allowed to have social media and i didnt want to get in trouble over that part#fantasizing alone is one thing but as soon as someone else is involved theyre me and im that person on da and i hate it. i hate it i hate it#i hate it i hate it#is that a common thing. where you feel like youre the abuser in certain contexts even if youre nothing like them#whatever. i have physical therapy and then ask a prof if i can use him as a reference and then finish my application if he gets back to me#and then i can rot all i want#sky vents like amogus
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fortunately-bi · 10 months ago
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...... If I went on a hiatus for who knows how long again would y'all hate me....... 👉👈
#i just spent like an hour writing and rewriting a post trying to explain myself amd its just so hard to put into words#im bored here but not in a ew not enough content for the dopamine hit shit#in like a every time i scroll through I dont smile I dont see anything that makes me happy at all i dont get a laugh or anything#its just mindless brain rotting scrolling nothing wasting my time hoping maybe ill see a new artist to follow or something#and every time its nothing#so much nothing taking up so much of my time and space in my life and i already dont have a lot of time to begin with#ive made some awesome friends here ive had lovers from here ive had people who are no longer on this earth from here who ill never forget#i dont think ive really enjoyed anything on here in 7 years#ive left before for a really long time i think like a year or more or something#and i wont be totally unreachable of people message me ill respond but im so sick of this stupid app taking up my life#and all i ever get out of it is getting mad or getting depressed over shit that really is t worth my mental state over#all i ever feel on here is that the world fuckin sucks and theres not even anything here to make hanging around worth it#im not new to this site making me suicidal for an abundance of reasons and im luckily in a spot where i wont actually hurt myself#its just ideation and intrusive thoughts but its a pattern i cant keep ignoring#also im old tumblr im old tumblr and i think i will always be old tumblr im just not catching on to new shit anymore#the fact im even saying anything about a hiatus should show how pld tumblr i am no one does this anymore lol#i just don't want to be here anymore i dont really want to be anywhere online anymore tbh#its always something and i cant mentally keep up with it anymore i have too much going on in my life#my wife is having cancer removed on Tuesday im a lead teacher who has to take care of i think 8 babies now#i have problems i have actual problems that need me and need me to be as there as i can be#i cant be spiraling over stuff online on top of real world problems im in no position to do anything about on top of personal life problems#that are drastically affecting my life at home and hurting my family and loved ones#i have a mass in my thyroid which is so big i choke to the point i stop breathing if I dont have my meds i throw up all day#i have to see a neurologist because at best i have a pinched nerve at worst im having seizures and i might have to move states again#i dont have it in me to come on here and see stuff that makes me upset for the chance i might see something i like#and i can unfollow people and whatever but I dont have the energy or time to sift through people i follow on here#if you want to talk in dms or asks or you want to send me posts pls by all means continue to do so thats fine#but i think i need to take the app out of my line of sight again for a bit and just be in the moment again same with twitter#anyways i love yall i promise i am safe and not in harms way im just stressed af and i have got to start cutting things out that#arent doing anything other then making me miserable
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going-to-ikea-for-the-fries · 11 months ago
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It's a Match! || 141 x Reader
[ Chapter 10 ] || [ Chapter 12 ]
Pairing: 141 x gn!Reader Words: 1.1K~ Summary: While overcoming recent heartbreak, you decide to join Tinder in search of a rebound. Your friends advise to just Swipe Right indiscriminately... What happens when 4 soldiers from the same squad match with you? a/n: i'm in love with gaz
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Chapter 11: Excuse me?
A DM suddenly shoots up to the top of the pile in Kyle’s Tinder DM list and his eyebrows raise when he sees your name.
It’s been a month and a half, maybe longer, since you two last matched and after the brief rejection and you having gotten with Price, his life moved on and he kind of forgot you existed.
But your sudden message whose preview starts with “hey sorry to be botheri-” intrigues him so he presses it.
you: hey sorry to be bothering u but i figured it was safe to dm u about this because between u and johnny u seemed to be the most mature one! is simon okay? he stopped replying to me like a week ago and im concerned
Kyle’s eyebrows shot up on his forehead upon reading the question.
Kyle: he’s been texting u? 🤨 you: HI! yeah he has Kyle: excuse me? 🤨🤨 Kyle: like texting texting u.  Kyle: as in you text him and he answers and u 2 chat? 😐 you: yes? 🙃 Kyle: tf kind of witchcraft did u pull on him? 🤨 Kyle: he doesnt text.  Kyle: not one of us can get more than a thumbs up reaction to our texts in the groupchat. 😑 you: he texts me! Kyle: 😫?? Kyle: jesus christ.  you: you didnt answer is he okay?? 😭😭
Kyle thought back on a reason why Ghost would suddenly, well, ghost you. But he can’t think of any… Ghost is a notoriously bad texter, it doesn’t surprise him that he went MIA…
And then it hits him.
It’s 8 A.M. in the rec room of their floor and Ghost was making tea just as Johnny was taking a seat in the couch.
Kyle oofed as Johnny hit him, throwing his legs over Kyle’s lap. “Watch it mate, fuck you’re bloody heavy!” He complained.
“AH, FUCKIN’ HELL!” Ghost cursed as he threw his hands up in the air the sound of water dripping on the floor catching his attention.
Kyle looked over to see Ghost had spilled his boiling hot water everywhere on the counter.
“You alright L.T.?” Soap asked a she lifted his head over the back of the couch to peer at Simon just like Gaz was.
“Great.” Ghost grunted as he picked up his phone from the counter, which was also dripping in water, while his other hand threw a rag onto the mess of water dripping down from the counter.
“Oh fuck… ‘s your phone dead?” Soap asked and Ghost grumbled under his breath, not quite answering the question, as he busied himself soaking up the spilled water.
Just then, Price showed up at the rec room door. “Simon, gear up. Got a briefing for a solo mission in 10.”
“Fuckin’ hell, yeah, yeah, I got it.” Ghost grunted as he cleaned the mess and then rushed out the door, leaving his mug of tea in the counter and clutching his now broken phone in his hands.
Kyle: hes fine. Kyle: he spilled water on his phone and killed it I think.  Kyle: and he got sent out before he could get it fixed. 🙃 you: oh okay good! you: thanks! you: sorry to have bothered you! 🙏 Kyle: now wait just a minute. 😤 Kyle: u need to explain how in the hell u and ghost talk.👀 you: ghost? Kyle: that’s his work name. 🤷‍♂️ you: fitting seeing as i thought he ghosted me Kyle: THAT’S THE JOKE I MADE JUST NOW TO MYSELF! 😭 you: were in sync it seems 😭 Kyle: answer the question tho. you: idk what u want me to answer with Kyle: wdym u dont know??? explain yourself. Kyle: how do you get ghost to text u???? you: idk? im funny ig Kyle: 😑 you: im sorry if thats not what u want to hear Kyle: wait Kyle: a couple weeks ago he was out all night Kyle: during morning training soap was talking about how he had a date Kyle: was he with u? 👀👀 you: soap? Kyle: johnny. Kyle: keep up cmon now. you: jeez don’t patronize me you: yes simon was with me Kyle: 👀👀👀 Kyle: i see. Kyle: tell me more. you: theres nothing to tell Kyle: thats a lie and u know it.  you: its not!!! Kyle: cmon. Kyle: u cant just meet with a bloke with a skull mask on and then say u dont have anything to tell. 😑😑 you: a skull mask?? Kyle: did he not wear a mask when he was with u? 🤨🤨 you: yes? you: a black one Kyle: with a skull print on it yeah? you: no??? 🙃 you: just black! Kyle: jesus christ. Kyle: and what? what happened? you: nothing?! Kyle: walk me thru it. you: we went out for a drink then came back to mine and watched a movie! Kyle: 🤨🤨 Kyle: and had a shag? you: NO???? Kyle: wdym no? thats what would normally happen with a bloke. you: and???? you: this is simon were talking about kyle you: nothing about him screams normal exactly 🙃 you: hes joked about being able to kill me with his bar ehands you: bare hands* Kyle: fair. Kyle: this raises more questions for me. you: what Kyle: like u would meet with a masked bloke that can kill u with his bare hands alone without protection? 🤨 you: i had protection Kyle: not a condom. you: oh 😅 you: well we met at a pub soooo  Kyle: what did u 2 do then Kyle: other than watch a ‘movie’ 🙄 you: played mario kart you: slept Kyle: as in Kyle: you SLEPT? like honk shoo honk mimimimi? you: yes🙄🙄 Kyle: im confused. you: ur confused? im fucking confused bro Kyle: wdym u SLEPT TOGETHER? 🙃 Kyle: WHAT KIND OF WITCHCRAFT IS THIS?  Kyle: wtf have u done to him Kyle: like ghost doesnt text, he sure as shit doesnt visit people, and he doesnt go on dates, he doesnt sleep next to people, im almost sure the man doesnt have feelings or emotions and only speaks in sarcasm  Kyle: how can u get that out of him?? 🤨🤨 Kyle: no one else can! you: well with that mentality you cant you: idk what to tell u you: we hit it off 🙄 Kyle: explain yourself. you: ive been explaining it!!!!! Kyle: no explain it better. Kyle: I think Im having a stroke.  you: idk how to make it clearer??? Kyle: thats it. Kyle: are you free rn?? Kyle: I need u to explain urself. 😑 you: Im at work? Kyle: whens ur lunch break? 👀 you: in 35 minutes. Kyle: do u like ramen? you: yes? Kyle: whats the closest japanese to ur job? you: Akira Kyle: meet me at Akira for lunch. Kyle: I’m buying. you: who said i want to meet up with u?? 🤨🤨 Kyle: man just get down there. Kyle: im offering to pay. you: fineeeee 🙄
Kyle quickly hopped up from his seat at his desk with a start and rushed back to his room to change out of his fatigues.
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taglist (CLOSED! not adding anyone else, sorry!): @daisychainsinknots , @bunnysdaydreams , @iite-cool , @lahniu , @pagesfalling , @tapioca-milktea1978 , @live-love-be-unique , @thelaisydazy , @littleghosthunter , @bossva , @emotion-no-hot-yes-hotel-trivago , @chamomiletealeaf , @ghosts-hoe , @kariiiel , @ltbarnes , @irregulardongyoung , @spacelia , @hayleybarnesx , @infpt-zylith , @xxshadowbabexx , @frescoisnotinthemilitary , @leeeenistop , @lucienbarkbark , @zombie-freak , @wittleespur
@severenswife , @enarien, @agoodmoviekiss , @l0lziez , @whos-fran , @greatstormcat , @openup-yourmind , @neoarchipelago , @sodavrr , @cutiecusp , @lilliumrorum , @c-nstantine , @kneelforloki , @comeonatmebruh , @codsunshine , @waiting-so-long , @captainquake42 , @gazspookiebear , @mynameismisty , @reap3erslov3 , @reaper-chan666 , @poohkie90 , @kitwithnokat , @stick-the-dumbass , @mothsdrabbles , @justanerd1 , @thesinsoflust , @thriving-n-jiving , @blckbrrybasket
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ribread03 · 3 months ago
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Our Song I
m.sturniolo
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Summery: When you receive a DM from nick asking you about doing a collaboration with them you cant help but say yes!
THIS IS MY WORK AND MY IDEA! PLEASE DONT USE THIS AS “INSPIRATION” OR TAKE IT WITHOUT GETTING MY PERMISSION FIRST! thank you :)
AN: this is part one of the series “our song” if you would like to know more about “y/n” you can use the mood board! Enjoy :)
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Y/N POV
You’re sitting at your desk editing the newest YouTube video you plan to put out. Music is playing in the background as you zone out into your computer. Your phone dings, pulling you out your computer to see who might have messaged you.
Your heart skips a beat when you see “nicolassturniolo sent you a message” in your notification stack. You’ve been a fan of the sturniolo triplet since what felt like forever, and now Nick is messaging you on instagram. You’re in such a state of shock as you open the message, hands trembling as you read what it says;
“Hello, Me, Matt and Chris have come across your YouTube channel and we’re wondering if you want to collab with us sometime in the future….”
Flash Back Two Weeks Ago…
You had just finished editing a YouTube video to post, hitting the post button you close your computer and lay down to take a nap. Expecting the usual few hundred comments and likes when you wake up in a few hours.
Boy were you wrong… A few hours go by and you wake up and see that your video has blown up, thousands of views, thousands of comments, and thousands of new subscribers. Your eyes scan your phone “congratulations on 1 MILLION subscribers” was in your email.
“OH! MY! GOD!” You screamed out, alerting your parents who happened to be downstairs, to hear you. Jumping up and out of bed, starting to exit your room, stepping over piles of books and clothes.
“Y/N? Are you okay!?” You can hear your mother frantically call up to you while walking up the stairs.
“I HIT A MILLION SUBSCRIBERS!” You say excitedly while meeting her in the hallway…
Back to the present…
“Oh. my. god…” you say quietly, fingers hovering over your screen, scared that if you hit anything this will all be a figment of your imagination. Clicking on the notification you hold your breath as your phone unlocks and opens instagram… this is no figment of your imagination. This is real life and the triplets really want to collaborate with you.
You let out a few more silent “omgs” before heading downstairs to talk to your mom about all of this. You exit your room and walk down the stairs, “Momma?” You say softly as you round the corner into the kitchen.
“Yeah sweetie?” Your mom says as she’s washing the dishes. You sit on a small stool on the floor before you talk again, petting your cat, nugget, that was by your feet.
“I got a message from Nick Sturniolo, asking if I wanted to collaborate with them,” you can hear the excitement in your voice as you tell your mom. Your mom also knows that you’ve been a fan, and practically obsessed, with these three boys since high school and have always wanted to meet them one day.
“You did? That’s great honey, what did you say?” She asks turning the sink off and turning to face you.
“I didn’t answer yet.. I'm honestly scared because what if they change their minds?” You explain to your mom with a nervous chuckle. Your cat had now made its way up onto your lap, purring loudly.
“I think you should do whatever you want, just know that a flight out to LA might be expensive.” You took your mom’s words to heart and gave her a small nod.
“I want to go out and meet them, a collaboration would help me so much.. maybe if I get a little more information then I’ll be able to see if I can afford it or not,” you explained back to your mom, pulling your phone out to DM Nick back.
“I would love to collab with you guys one day! That has been an absolute dream of mine forever. I would love to share some more information about when and where if possible.” You hit send with slightly shaky fingers before talking to your mom again, “I just messaged him back, I asked him for some more details on when and where we would collab”
“Okay sweetie,” your mom says softly before returning to whatever she was doing in the kitchen, before you came out there to talk to her. You give your cat a few more pets before standing and going back into your room, waiting for Nick to message you back with more details surrounding this possible future collaboration…
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Matts POV
“Did you ask her yet?” Matt was sitting next to Nick looking over at his phone. Matt had seen your YouTube video and thought you were the most beautiful, funny, and relatable person on the internet, and he knew right then and there he needed to meet you.
He had asked Nick and Chris what they thought of some of your YouTube videos, hinting at the idea of a collaboration with you. Saying and pointing out things that would hopefully catch his brother's attention and make them also want to meet you, just maybe not for the same reason.
Matt would find himself scrolling through your instagram when he was bored, careful not to like any of your posts, wanting to keep you out of his fans stalking obsessions before he could even properly meet you. Thumbs carefully scrolling on TikTok as he watches every video you’ve made on there, watching how every video is a little different.
“Yes Matt, I did ask her,” Nick says with a slight eye roll, becoming tired of his brother’s constant asking. Nick's phone dings lightly, alerting that someone messaged him, the someone being you. Nick opens instagram and the messages that the two of you have sent back and forth. Matt's eyes scan the screen quickly, not caring that he might be invading some privacy of his brothers.
Matt's eyes land on the words, “I would love to collab with you guys one day! That has been an absolute dream of mine forever…” and he immediately becomes happier, his smile widening and eyes seem to sparkle and little more.
Nick sends you a quick DM back, asking if regular texting would be easier to send information through and that the collab would be sometime within the next two months. “I can’t believe she said yes!” Matt explains to Nick, his excitement evident in his tone.
“I didn’t think she would say no,” Nick says calmly, typing out his phone number to send to you…
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AN: i hope you enjoyed this first part! If you would like to be on the tag list for this series comment on this post! Just asking to be added and i will do so :) feed back and thoughts are always welcome!
All boarders are from @issysh3ll
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freakroth · 10 months ago
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Hii!! Can I req Chuuya x SH reader? Can be both angst and fluff, you don't have to tho if you don't wanna <3
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𝓒𝓱𝓾𝓾𝔂𝓪 𝔁 𝓖𝓝! 𝓻𝓮𝓪𝓭𝓮𝓻
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This is another thing i didn't expect people to request, and it brings me so much comfort when i find sh comfort fanfics:(
If you are struggling with sh please know i'm always open to talk if you want:) and i'll try to comfort you to the best of my ability! (i'm usually not on here during the day so you can ask me for my discord in dms)
I'M SO SRRY THIS TOOK SO LONG TO MAKE I REALLY NEEDED A BREAK SINCE I WAS SO STRESSED FROM SCHOOL 😭
Also, English isn't my first language so please dont mind any spelling errors!!
TW: SH, gore? Talk about fresh SH cuts, Might be ooc😓 please tell me if i missed anything!
Words: 1,3k
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sometimes in life things don't go the rigth way, is what people say, they say "sometimes in life things don't go the way we want, but thats just how it is"
But right now it felt like absolutely nothing was going the right way, you felt like the whole world was against you, like you were some useless peace of garbage that could be thrown out at anytime, like there was no one in this damn world that would sit down and listen to your pityfull problems. you were at your abselut worst.
And the only thing that could help the with it was the razor in your hand, which is cutting your thigh. you move almost like a robot, you don't even feel the pain of the razor anymore. everything seems like a dream, all the blood coming out of your cuts and dripping and mixing in with the water of the bathtub, your vision being slightly blury.
You can feel your heart pounding in your chest as you bring your razor to your Radial vein. you shake slightly as you look down at your wrist debating if you should cut it or not.
As you start breathing faster you look at the suicide note you left on the chair next to the bathtub. you wondered how long it would take for chuuya to find you, would he even care if you died?
you feel tears start to run down your face and you start to sniffle uncontrollably.
As you're about to cut the vein you hear a loud knock on the door, "[name]? baby are you in there..?" your boyfriend chuuya asks in a quiet voice.
You quickly wipe your tears and panic a bit as you didn't lock the door since you weren't expectinc chuuya to come home this early, "Y-yeah.." you say trying to not sound sad, but knowing chuuya he most likely heard the saddnes in your voice.
"Darling.. is something wrong..?" He asks in a conserned voice, "i'm just.. washing my hair" you try to come up with an exuse while your whole body is shaking. "Darling, you washed your hair yestarday tho? are you really okay in there..?"
'Damn i forgot about that' you think while trying to find a place to hide the razor. While you panic you some how bump into the soaps and knock them down making a loud noise. "Baby are you okay? i'm coming in" he says and opens the door, "NO WAIT!" but before you can stop him, he has already opened the door and seen your cuts.
.....
.....
After a few moments of silence and staring at each other, chuuya finally makes a move closer to you.
"...Chuuya.. please i'm sorr-.." You try to explain but your voice starts to shake and you feel a lump in your throat. "...shh.." He quitelly walks closer to you and wipes the small tears that have started to for in your eyes.
"...I'm so sorry.. i k-know i said i'd.. try to stay clean for you.. i tried my best.. i swear.. i'm sorry.. please.. p-please don't get mad.." You sob as more and more tears start falling from your eyes. Your vision is starting to blur from all the tears, so much so that you can't even see chuuya anymore.
"....shh... darling.. i would never be mad at you.. what could ever make you think that..? i understand how hard it is to recover from something like this.." He whispers into your ear while holding you close, not even caring about the blood staining his clothes.
All you can do is cry and cry, you cant even manage to answer his question, all that came out if your mouth were pityfull sobs and 'i'm so sorry'. Chuuyas shoulder was becoming wet form all the tears but he didn't mind, he would do anything just so that you could feel better.
After some time of Chuuya trying to comfort you and trying to get you to tell what happened, did you finally calm down slightly, just enough for you to able to answer his questions.
....
Chuuya starts washing your cuts gently, you both sit there in silence with the only sound beinf your small sniffles and some small choked sobs.
After a few seconds chuuya decides to break the slience, "..Darling, please.. what happened that made you relapce..?" he asks with a gentle tone while holding your shaking hands in his. For a moment you stay slient, wiping your tears. "...i... i-i've...", you say in a shaky voice trying to break out into a crying mess again. Right at this moment you didn't know what to say, you really didn't know how to say what made you do it.
"...take your time..", Chuuya's soft voice snaps you out of your trance, you feel his thumbs rubbing on top of your hands in a comforting way.
"...its hard to say.... i-i don't know how to put it into words..", you whisper, hoping chuuya wouldn't be mad. You're scared he'll be mad at your answer, scared he'll force you to talk, force you like your mother would always do. You remember the first time you relapsed she got mad and forced you to talk, even when you were crying.
"..thats fine.. its not always easy to put something like this into words.." Chuuya caressed your back in a comforting way, making you want to just cry, cry so hard and let everything out, everything that has been bothering you, all your worries and troubles. You felt so comfortable in his arms, like you were safe. "would writing it help?", he asks and runs his fingers through your hair.
You burry your face in his neck and nod, feeling him pick you up and carry you over to your bedroom. He gently puts you on the bed and you slightly whine from the stinging pain that came from your cuts, holding back your tears. '..i'm sucha an idiot..' you think while watching chuuya leave the room to go get paper.
....
Chuuya comes back after some time with a piece of paper and a pen. He gives you the stuff and sits down next to you while waiting for you to write on the paper.
You sit there for a second before starting to write about how you've been feeling really insecure about yourself and thinking that you arent enough for him and that he should be with someone else. Once you're done writing you hesitate to give the paper back to chuuya for a bit, but you decide to just do it.
Once its in Chuuyas hands, you look away embaressed about the thngs you wrote, hoping he wouldn't judge you for it.
After a bit of silence, chuuya finally says something, "Darling.. why didn't you tell me..? i could've helped you feel better.." He says quietly and you just look down ashamed feeling like everything is your fult. You knew you should have told him, maybe then you wouldn't be in so much pain at the moment.
You felt like you were about to cry again, you felt weak. You just wanted to lay down and forget about the world around you.
"...i was scared.. i'i was so scared you'd be mad at me..." Your voice breaks as you try to explain everything to him. Chuuya sit there with you in his arms listening to you with a worried look on his face.
"...darling i would never hate you.. you're the most important person in my life, i would never be mad at you for relapcing.." He says while stroking your hair and rocking back and forth slowly. you hug him tight, like your scared he'll be gonne once you let go of him.
For the rest of the night chuuya keeps you in his arms while he comforts you and tells you how much he loves you.
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Grr the end was rushed 😓😓
Anyways, pleae give me some feedback, it really helps me when people tell me what i should try to be better at.
Do not repost this on any other website without asking me first and giving me credit!!
Requests: Closed for now
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drewsprincessy · 4 months ago
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loving you was hard.
warnings: angst, heartbreak, anger, crying, mentions of sex, lmk if i missed any!
summary: rafe and reader are in love, but rafe struggles to accept it, he doesnt believe in love.
rafe cameron x female reader
part two.
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it had been weeks since the incident at the party you and rafe argued at. you finally stopped thinking about him, but he definitely never stopped thinking about you. he sent you countless dms, even texted you off 7 different numbers that he created just to try and contact you.
he was a complete mess. he hadn't showered in days, he was snorting cocaine like there was no tomorrow, and he was drinking like he never wanted to wake up. he didnt care though, he had one thing on his mind. that was you.
he cried for days and nights, crying himself to sleep. and some nights he wouldn't even sleep.
he was beyond guilty. guilty for upsetting you, making you cry, he felt like he was going to die if he didnt get you back. he loved you, and with this time being away from you, he sees that. he didnt deserve you, he took your kindness for granted, and he wishes he would have been a better man for you. he wishes he really would've commited to you, because he sees now that these chicks do nothing for him. he doesnt even get turned on by the thought of anyone but you.
you'd be sitting in your room, brushing your hair at your organized vanity, and you hear your phone buzz. you pick it up, and see a no caller id. you pick up, curiously. you click the button to put it on speaker
"hello?" you speak into the phone
"y/n. its me, please let me come over. okay? i know you've seen the dms ive been sending you, baby please. let me come over and explain."
you go quiet for a moment, contemplating whether or not you should let him. after a moment of thought, you speak. "um yeah come over."
without another word, rafe hangs up and runs out the house. having to run back in to grab his keys. he comes back out his house and brings his motorcycle's engine to life. he then speeds off into the night, following the route to your house.
he gets there and knocks 3 times, and paces around impatiently.
you open the door with ur hairbrush still in hand, you stand there awkwardly waiting on him to say something.
he scratches the back of his neck, and stutters over his words "uh, can i- um come in?"
you sigh softly "um yeah sure" you step out of the way to let rafe in, you watch as he immediately makes his way through the doorway.
you make your way down the hallway, and open the door to your bedroom. he steps in first, and you follow.
you're the first to break the silence "so, what did u wanna talk about?" you say as you set your hairbrush down on your vanity.
"Uh, I wanted to say that I'm sorry... for a lot of things, well one because um I haven't been the best person to you. and I know your angry because I can't commit to a relationship, and you have every right to be... but for you I want to try. I wanna try to be in a relationship y/n. for you. like none of that hooking up with other girls shit or nuthin.. I want you. just you"
"rafe..i dont want u to just try. if the same thing happens again i dont know if my hearts gonna be able to take it.."
"i know princess, im not gonna do that shit again. a'ight? cmere let me hold you."
as you step closer to him, you can't help but wonder if hes really going to change this time..
-
a/n: this part is sooo rushed sorry in advance :(
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spade-12 · 24 days ago
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Spade Doodles Showcase Is Here! (100+ followers special!)
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- Duration
From January 18 to TBD?? (Deadline for when I stop taking requests not when I stop drawing!)
- Details
To celebrate me reaching 100+ followers, I will be hosting a small event!
First and foremost, I want to thank everyone for following & supporting me - regardless of my inactivity - and interacting with my posts ^^. Sometimes I just come off and on again and I’m still surprised when people engage with my blog. I think it’s typical of me to say that I never thought I would ever get to meet so many people that welcome me to this community. Or to have any moots at all. And I know I don’t interact much (which I want to do more, I’m just really bad at socializing >_>), but I’ve meet amazing people, from the art that they make, and to the person they are in general. To whoever’s reading this, thank you, regardless if you follow me or not, I appreciate everyone’s support :)
100 may not be a big number, but it’s still pretty amazing that 100 people (+more) enjoy my blog enough to follow me . I’m glad people like my art, and that I could share it to other people. No words and numbers can express the immense gratitude to have meet you all, and to be able to be in this community. Thank you all for listening to me blabber and thank you for the support ❤️ now on to the real stuff!
-EVENT INFO-
A request event where you can roll on this limited banner featuring my Yuusona and Grim! In this banner you get to roll for their cards, sort of like a gacha! And whatever card you roll on, will be the surprise you will get for your request! 🎉
(inspired by a gacha pulling event by @/the-rini-rush or now @/rinis-reality!)
-How to roll
Leave a comment or an ask, then if I stumble upon your request, I’ll spin a random number generator from 1-8. For example, if I rolled (1) for your request, that means you’ll receive the starsending card, and if the request asks for a drawing of Kalim with yuu, then I(♠️) will draw a fully-rendered piece! As explained below. But if there are any specific requests, it will hopefully be mentioned in the request! Like a specific pose, or idea, etc.
Note-I think I might skip on the dms, because I realized that my gacha has to be a surprise for my rollers, and responding means they’re chosen buttttt, 👀 I want it to be a secret! Orrr maybe it might be too much if it’s dms 😭 idkk But I’ll respond to any comments asking, guess that’s not so secret, but when I will get the drawing done will depend 🙇‍♂️
Rules/How to Join!
Moots & followers can only participate-but I’m always open to new followers!(˶ᵔ ᵕ ᵔ˶)
Comment, or submit an ask about your request!
Specify any details you want incorporated, poses, ideas, details, etc.
I may dm personally if I have any questions
Requests are not “limited,” but I will take priority for first come first serve if you ever request twice! Depending if people participate at all hhh><
DOS
Only TWST related (for now?. Unless I’m in the mood..)
Limited to 2 people in a request, depending on complexity, but feel free to add more just in case!
OC/CC, OC/CC, and CC/CC allowed!
Age appropriate (SFW) please nothing suggestive 😭 I can’t draw that…
DONTS
Nothing pro ship, homophobic, or anything with ill intent, I don’t condone that here!
I might not be able to draw certain/complex things because i’m not capable enough … (complex mechas, backgrounds -depends-, furries, anthro 😭)
Additional info (Please read!! ^^)
Occasionally I might do other drawing ideas or participate in other events (just as little breaks in between!)
Drawings may take a while , but I’ll try my best!
I’ll also note they might take longer due to irl stuff, and also I’ve been coming down with the flu these daysss..
Note the drawings example below may not be the exact style you’ll be getting
Also my drawings may suck, so yea, beware!👻👻
Featured Cards ♠️
I was planning to do more refined examples but I grew lazy and I haven’t been doing well, so that adds to the surprise! Sorry everyone 🥹 also some of these are older drawings I never posted-
Hopefully my health gets a bit better!!^^
1.SSR- Starsending
A request style painting, with additional sketches, where it will be rendered, shaded, and most detailed!
2.SSR- White Rabbit Festival
A request collection of sketches, a mixture of color and tiny drawings!
Ex.
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3.SSR- Liongarb
A request collection a whole page of doodles (some slightly colored with lots of different pictures!
Ex.
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4.SSR- Dorm Uniform
A request special card sr, where you can get a design for a ungroovy and groovy!
5.SSR- Birthday boy
A request special card SSR where you can get a design with a ungroovy and groovy!
Ex.
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6.SSR- Birthday Jacket
A request where you can get a special cover based on the official TWST manga! (By Yana’s style) + possible manga panel?
7.SSR - Bloom Broomquet Birthday
A request where you can get a special cover based on the Offical TWST manga! (By Aida Suzuka’s style) + possible manga panel?
8.SSR - Platinum Birthday
A special request where you’ve reached guaranteed! If you get this card, you get to choose which selection of other request listed above you want! This is where I’ll dm the roller and they can select their choice!
Have fun with your pulls! Thank you again!
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BUT SERIOUSLY THANK YOU ALL!,! GSHSGD 😭😭😭 YOU GUYS ARE ALL AMAZING!!!!🫶💝❤️❤️💝❤️💝❤️❤️-♠️
-Additional full body ref of design and art-
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neo91502 · 1 month ago
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HAPPY BIRTHDAY TOMM TIREDSMASHBROS!!!
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note for tomm under the read more... lalala💥💥 @tiredsmashbros
ohhh tomm. tomm tiredmashbros, oh do you even know what has happened this, what, past half a year and counting? There has been so, so much improvement these past few months, whether that was to be art or even being able to grow the confidence to actually make a discord server and how well it is and how active it is to this day!!! It’s genuinely felt like it’s been so long, but truly only has been maybe about. since september so like 4 months maybe of the discord server? and so much has happened since then.
Onto the actual much deeper depths of paragraphs, you genuinely have changed my life in ways that I don’t think I could even achieve. Many days on vc’s, joking about the most random things, to the (about) most unexpected things, late night vc’s, the silly sleepover vc’s (technically late night... but shhhh), your paragraphs here, your just genuinely amazing self and personality. Even if you’re just another person in this world, I think you’re some of the best among everyone that I could’ve had the pleasure of getting to meet and know you.
I always loved the times when we vced and went “hey it’d be funny if we watched this video” then did that or, mainly, plan ahead and all. The pikmin iceberg (even if i fell asleep. whoops.), isaacwhy ltlvc, epic the musical, and so much more probably HSJDNSJ. I’ll always remember the first vc I was in with you, or at least the one that I think is the first since I think we both were muted then eventually unmuted JSIDJSSJ I still don’t remember who was all there... i think it’s really funny that like 1-2 months after that, we vced so much and literally couldn’t remember who was there in the first vc JSAKJSKDJD i think that vc was when we had that silly “IM NOT A TYPER” or something i think... I DONT HAVE THE ORIGINAL IMAGE SAVED RN JAHDJDSJ 💔💔💔 and i sounded in such despair because it was like 1 or 2 am for me and i had to be quiet... I always absolutely LOVE our vc’s together, even if i’m caught, i typically don’t actually feel that bad since it’s just like. augh. i have no idea how to explain it💔💔 but yeah 💥💥💥 —> EDIT HERE... LTIERALLY TALKING TO YOU IN DMS AND YOU LITERALY HAVE JT ON HAND. THE IM NOT A TYPER. BROOOOO IM GONNA GET YOU
The surprise you gave me for my birthday and the fact that you did an entire PARTY IN THE SERVER ???? dude i was genuinely so gobsmacked, even if i was late to it NSKDNSKAJA... there was so much going on, i’ll be so fr i literally can barely remember it other than you asking my favroite scene and saying flowerfield sunset and then some bit later you surprised me with the fanart of neo like GUH?????? oh my GOS AJAJSNSNbut even just the MERE IDEA of having a birthday party and the fact that you wanted to do one for me was so surprising and i’m so genuinely hyped for yours like GUH. I’m so HSJSNSJSJSKSKNDJD
as you already know, the drawing above took about 12 hours and 30 minutes to fully finish. honestly, to my first fanart of tsb to this one is just amazing and i wouldn’t be able to see such improvement if it weren’t for you, for your amazing lore of tsb (i will yap about this later...), stealing some of your silly techniques here and there, and so much more. i’m just. baffled at the thought of being here with your birthday today.
oh and your ART. oh my GOODNESS. Where do i even START. for one, i know for a FACT i have stolen silly little things out of your style because of how unique and silly it is and how i do this with all of my friends because i genuinely appreciate and love everything that everyone makes,,, i especially LOVE, oh my goodness do i LOVE how you do your coloring and shading. it’s so unique in a way that works so damn well with how you do your lines, whether it’s sketchy or not, the outlines, everything bro. the rendering gets me the most. you WITNESSED me STRUGGLE to recreate it because i really wanted to try out and do a piece more in your style of things!! i do want to say it had been actually so fun doijg that... i should do it again lalalala... BUT ANYWASY!!!!! i’ve always just. oh my god. LOVE and just BUSHSURHEJSNA i just love how do you comics bro,.... no matter if they’re the ones like your final or the ones like the memories tsb lore... and especially the SPEED YOU GET THESE DONE AT ???? BRO IM SO JEALOUS IN THE BEST WAY POSSINLE... i don’t think i’ll ever stop looking up to you bro...
and now the lore. oh my Lore. Lore lore lore lore . im gonna gET YOUUUUUUU. i’m so INVESTED in tsb’s lore... the creation of this whole universe with cartoony characteristics (it’s literally just. HOW DO I EXPLIJA IT ITS BASISLY LIKE JUST A CARTOON WHDJSNS AND I LOVE IT), pipedream, watchman, the mysterious feeling, the character development. bro EVERYHTING. i cant BELEIVE you hide so much shit in the tiniest things, make entire comics out of what look like such simple asks but no your ass is over here producing COMICS for this bro..... i’m so jealous oh my GOD...... there’s so much i can think of but it feels so little of what we actually know (confirmed) so far... also i see you editing the playlist... your ass is NOT SLICK!!!
comsider all of these paragraphs and everything i’ve said to you already in vc as revenge for all the genuine most kindest paragraphs i’ve read in my life in the reblogs of tsb fanart... guh.... also off topic from this, i realized this is the first time you’ll see me draw emmet oh my god....
i’m so sure i have more to say but my ass actually cant think of anything brooooo.... maybe i’ll send you paragraphs in dms when i think of it and actually remember it GUH.... OH OH WAIT WAIT ALL THE JOKES THAT WE’VE MADE. dude i’m always just being so silly in vc and i think it’s really silly and comedic when you’re over there making silly little doodles and i just go “you should draw tsmg4/smg4 with long hair/smg34” or other alike things.... i don’t think i’ll also ever live down the times when i fell asleep on vc and you were there for i think all of them except maybe 1 ? i have no clue... bro your voice genuinely so calming i’m gonna fall asleep again some day 😭😭
okay enough yapping about that i THINK...., when I first found you, it was literally from the lipbite part 1 comic 😭😭 and i was like “oh hey, i actually kind of really like this person’s art!!” so yk. i followed you!!! if i told my past self that i’d be sitting here right now, typing all of this out, they wouldnt believe me. I’m genuinely just so baffled at the mere thought of being here and being able to call you a friend. hell. i’d even say best friends / close friends bro... i cannot even fathom the thought of that in the past, yet, here i am, able to call you a friend that i talk to about regularly i’d say.
I want to say it again; Happy birthday Tomm, I hope you have one of the best birthdays in your life and thank you for everything.
-Neo 💙
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also,,, here’s a silly meme
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part 1 of 2 ... i mean. who said that!!!!
part 2 here
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beawhatchumean · 2 months ago
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IT IS HE!!
back to shimeji making and with the white hons himself
LMK AO LIE SHIMEJI VER 1.0!!
Just click on the big words and ya can download, ye :D Contains 2 zipfiles: The normal version and less frames version
Read down below for explanations on that
if got any problems launching and stuff, dont be afraid to message me, i'll try to help ya out :>
OR you can join my Discord server for easier help (will explain more down in the post)
but as seen in the quick lil poster i made there, it says extra animation + more, more info about that underneath the read 👇
from the top,
EXTRA ANIMATION
like my previous Shimejis, this one has unique frames for each action of the Shimeji. best example is the walk, run, dash actions seen below
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there are other actions that have unique frames like these, but that's for you to find out yourself sksks
CUSTOM ACTION NAME
As per usual, some actions are renamed to better fit the character. Here is a guide for what they do:
Fall Over = Ao Lie falls down in a silly way and sits up again
Suprise From Behind = Shimeji breeding 1
Invite In = Shimeji breeding 2
disclaimer, I still have not done the full action guide list but I have listed a few renamed actions in guide.txt for referencing. Stay tune when I finally make that ref list
CUSTOM ACTION
Just like SWK & Mackie, petting is enabled here too!! So pet Ao Lie's little head to your heart's content hehe (credit to Kilkakon for the original script)
ALSO, the pet action is now fully animated!! However, the animation will keep playing even after you're done petting him
as seen in this gif :3
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Steps to do this action is as followed:
Make the shimeji sit down (any surface is okay, ie work floor/window top)
Move the cursor to the shimeji's head
Make sure it is a hand cursor and not an arrow cursor
Pet away!!
If you want to pick up the shimeji without prompting the pet action, just move the cursor lower until it turns into the arrow icon
NON-SYMMETRICAL SHIMEJI
Like Macaque, Ao Lie also has non-symmetrical frames. So his collar will always shape a "Y" anywhere he goes!
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Same as before, Ao Lie needed much more frames than he needs to get this effect to work. But, it may make some devices lag me thinks. So, there's 2 versions to download. One with symmetry and one without
PLEASE DOWNLOAD THE LESS FRAME VERSION TO NOT FRY YOUR PC'S!!
COLORED SETTINGS
Oh yea one thing I am excited to announce. The settings for the shimeji are now coloured!!
this has been a feature since long ago in the program but there was a bug. But now, it is fixed and now I can customize the colour scheme whenever and whatever I choose so >:3c
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If you would like to change the colours yourself, just head into the "Theme" tab and change the colours there.
ALTERED SOME ACTIONS
There are now a few actions that will happen by itself, without you needing to choose in the "Set Behaviour" list.
Like the previous dash action, and now the daggling legs action that can happen when he sits down.
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UPDATES WILL HAPPEN!!
Like the rest of my shimejis. UPDATES, UPDATES, UPDATES!! honestly, for Ao Lie I cant think for much updates besides software updates. For features and what not, he probably is going to have the least features update. But if yall have any suggestions, drop me a message or in my discord server
oh yea
I HAVE A DISCORD SERVER NOW!!
So after releasing the Shadowpeach Shimeji, so many people messaged me questions and needing help on how to work the shimeji and other stuff. So far, people only contacted me through dm's on tumblr, instagram, and just using Patreon's comment section.
Honestly, worse way to communicate since some issues I needed pictures and long messages to help out. So, discord server it is. Here's what ya can expect
Shimeji stuff (questions, wips, FAQ, etc)
Alerts on my posts and streams
Space for arts (any arts, not just drawing :>)
Share anything ya want (shitposts, current fixation, info, etc)
Just socialize and make friends :D
Ya can read more info in the rules & directory channel when ya join
So if ya interested, just click the link below
DISCORD SERVER: BEA'S CHILLAX HOLE
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
but for now that will be all for ver. 1.0
many thanks to anyone interested in this project and of course
BIGGEST THANKS TO THOSE THAT HELPED BETA TEST THEM
for privacy reason they shall stay anonymous but
❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤ >:3
PLUS EVEN MORE HEARTS!! ❤❤❤❤❤❤❤
ACCEPT MORE HEARTS HHHHHHHHHHHHHHH ❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤
okay bye
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these-posts-arent-real · 9 months ago
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Time to catch up on your favorite dashboard simulator :3
#gonna start scheduling these for 1 or 2 per day #i really enjoy making them but I think i'll get burnt out otherwise #also HUGE ty to whoever was the anon who sent me the idea #about having therian cats #ohhh my god #hey anon #(or anyone else but im talkin to u) #feel free to dm me to talk at any point you seem cool
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🔁 🐍xviper-the-fagx reblogged
🫎 mo0sedude Follow
I PASSED MY ASSESSMENT!!! AAAAAHHH
🪺 robbbinpaw Follow
OMSC CONGRATS MOOSE! I'm so happy for you!!!!
🐍 xviper-the-fagx
WOAAAHHH CONGRATULATIONS MOOOSEE!!! Have you had your name ceremony yet??
#im so happy for ya dude #moving on from apprenticeship </3 #gonna miss you in the 'apprentice things' tag
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🔁 🏞 trouttail-prefers-bass Follow reblogged
🏞 trouttail-prefers-bass Follow
Daily selfie !!!
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Trying on some new berry-based fur dye.
🏞 trouttail-prefers-bass Follow
The amount of cats commenting "you'll never be a she-cat" and "wearing fur dye won't make you female" is astounding. Like. Thanks?? I'm a trans guy not a trans girl...
#lol?? #this is so funny to me #trans
4,703 notes
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🥬 rxttencatmint Follow
Ahh.. different type of post than usual, but.. mmrrnn... I'm considering coming out to my mentor. I know he's supportive, but I'm really nervous, so, uh.. I'm gonna leave it up to a Clanblr poll haha..
#trans #transmasc #trans tom #transgender #trans apprentice #advice #poll
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🤍 snwtl Follow
* ,○ ' WELCOME TO MY BLOG ^. o° ;
adult female cat - 49 moons - gender critical
Keep reading
#terfsafe #radfem #adult female cat #terf #riverclan
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🔁 🥬 rxttencatmint reblogged
🍲 ex-thundrclan-kipper Follow
New neighbors have THE most annoying dog I've ever met in my life. Won't shut up about how that's her yard and to get back... nobody wants your yard Jackie, shut uppp...
🌻 l1llyst3m Follow
Since when do you speak dog????
🍲 ex-thundrclan-kipper Follow
I started picking it up when I moved to the twolegplace. I'm still not fluent, but I can hold a conversation with the neighborhood dogs if I want.
#every new thing i learn about kipper #just. wow #he is so coolll... #this is totally not the gender envy and parent issues speaking
2,851 notes
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🔁 🌊 missingmyscales reblogged
🦊 foxx--hearted Follow
The worst part about being a fox therian is that even when I am partially accepted, it's usually because cats are telling me how horrible foxes are, and how I should've "picked a different species" because they think that's how it works.
🌊 missingmyscales Follow
Imagine being a fish. In RiverClan.
The closest I ever get to "acceptance" is my friends joking about how I would taste.
🦋 lalala-bluegaze Follow
How does it feel to have to eat the thing your damaged brain thinks you are. Lol
🌊 missingmyscales Follow
Frst off. "Damaged brain" like. Oookay guess we're just being really mean to others on Clanblr today. Second off ,I dont eat fish??? I never even implied that I eat fish.
🦋 lalala-bluegaze Follow
You're from RiverClan lmao. What else is there to eat
🌊 missingmyscales Follow
...
You are joking, right?
Lizards, birds, water voles and shrews, snakes, frogs, toads?? None of those come to mind when you consider the potential diet of a RiverClan warrior??????
🦊 foxx--hearted Follow
@missingmyscales you should probably just block @lalala-bluegaze, her whole blog is about being anti-kittypet, anti-therian, not believing enbies or bisexuals/any other lgbt identity than lesbian or gay or binary trans is valid, and a whole bunch of other stuff. It's not worth talking to her.
🌊 missingmyscales Follow
Ahh thanks... blocked her. I didnt think to check her blog beforehand
#sorry again for arguing on your post, Maple #saw a misconception ab RiverClan and blacked out lol
407 notes
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🔁 🏞 trouttail-prefers-bass reblogged
🌾 barncat-vibes Follow
Good morning everyone <3 remember to eat breakfast and stay hydrated!
2,301 notes
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🐍 xviper-the-fagx
Ithunk i atw a bug
#it difnr taste good euther :/
1 note
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🌱 dirtdigger-23 Follow
So I guess I'm just on this site now?? Clanblr is gone. I can't access any of its posts. But. I can see "Tumblr". Which is weird. The posts are really strange here.
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asmogorna · 3 months ago
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Okay so there’s this ww artist on ig called like tooth lilys or something and he’s always causing drama in the ww fandom and he mouthed off about your art and now heaps of insta ww fans are like talking about you :| free publicity?
ahhhh so thats whats happening .. lmao thats crazy
i checked out their story, and i sure doooo love how they leave some things out when talking about both situations that they mentioned to make me look worse ..
ok so
warning, yap session incoming
the "will wood in a (miku) binder" thing happened back in fall 2023 when i was still semi new to the fandom and didnt know a lot of things. so tho i to this day i dont think it was that big of a deal, i wouldnt do it today
it was an artwork made for shits and giggles, the context of which i have explained here before. i never meant to imply that will wood is trans and i certainly dont "headcanon" him as that. my curse is that even when joking around i tend to try and make my art look good, so i get why people thought it was unironic. and i know that it sounds like a lame ass excuse, but it legit didnt cross my mind that people would think i drew will wood as a trans guy or smth. legit my only thought process was "funny haha internet thing" + "my favorite thing" = "good idea"
now the usage of his real name is something i am genuinely sorry for, but it was an accident and a genuine mistake on my part. i remember seeing someone mention it casually in some comment section, and assuming that it was ok, since i didnt know he was in any way against it. (i also thought that it was the same name that he used in "the real will wood" in that one section cus it sounded a bit similar).
when i was informed about the fact that he doesnt want it spread around i deleted the post right away and apologized, so bringing it up like something i did on purpose and out of malicious intent is a tad bit .. misfitting, if you can use that word
now the hot topic of the day: my waywood art
i have said this before and i will say this again, how i feel about rpf is solely based off how the people involved feel about it
to clarify: i never drew anything inappropriate or even suggestive with them, the "worst" thing is 2 simple sketches of them smoochin. or. this.
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idk if this is what they were referring to when talking about me drawing will wood and gerard way "making out" (specifically. because i think "making out" implies to be more sexual stuff than small kisses). and if so, then it once again feels like blowing things out of proportion
and now the point i want you to get: will wood wouldnt give a flying fuck
like i said earlier, i never drew anything inappropriate, because that would actually cross will's existent and real boundaries. you know, the ones that he stated
im not making some conspiracy theories about him being gay, like some people seem to imply in their inbox messages to me
im not sending a whole ass smut fanfiction to litwtc gmail or something, i dont bother him in instagram dms asking if he wants to fuck gerard way, im not shipping him with people who he actually knows personally and has to look in the eyes of from time to time
im not doing anything that he would actually care about
him and chris have joked about him being attracted to gerard before, and though im not saying that you can joke about everything theyve ever joked about, i feel like in our case its clear that will clearly doesnt care about the implications ? (i generally believe that ww fans would get their panties twisted about less things if more of them listened to what these 2 talk about so calmly on litwtc but i digress)
if he saw that some random teenager on tumblr is drawing him and gerard way (gasp of horror) holding hands, he'd laugh at it max and then move on with his day
people are treating the whole situation like i posted pictures of him from when he was a kid or leaked patreon content or drew him fully naked or anything else that, you know, would actually affect him in one way or another
what im doing is innocent fun which isnt even likely to reach either of them. will wood very rarely checks tumblr and, once again, i genuinely dont believe he would care. and gerard way aint got no internet + he doesnt care x 2
it is weird but rn this is what brings me the most joy, even if its silly to say. both will wood and gerard way mean a lot to me and putting them in situations together makes me happy. i am but a child full of fun whimsy
i wont be posting any more explicitly romantic art to avoid more drama, and i also wont be responding to all the anon messages i received because there are like .. too many of them. an overwhelming amount i'd say. sorry about that
i really didnt mean to cause such a fuss, and i understand why some people might be uncomfortable with what i do
i fully understand why you would dislike my waywood hyperfixation shenanigans, and i dont have a problem w you over that, but treating me like pure evil because of a thing so insignificant is just.. overdoing it
once again, i will be toning it down, but it really isnt the end of the world if i dare to draw will wood and gerard way being a tad bit gay (which is, i apparently need to mention, not me actually saying that will wood the alternative musician is a homosexual gay who is in a genuine for real actual real gay homosexual relationship with gerard fucking way the lead singer of my chemical romance. i think speculating on other people's sexuality and gender identity is boooo tomato tomato tomato)
sorry for the rant and sorry to all who were disappointed by my lack of remorse. come back in a couple years when i turn 18 and stop having fun and artistic freedom
thank you for your attention and i hope i at least cleared some things up to those who werent w me throughout every event where i get involved in fandom drama
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bye bye
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gavisfanta · 10 months ago
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ICKS - GAVI
summary: part two of the ick trend with you and gavi.
warnings: none
"Okay today we're gonna do a proper challenge since someone had to ruin it." You gave Gavi a side eye while he just laughed. "So, I'd say you can start." You added and looked at your phone recording.
"Okay, so, I get the Ick, when you're hung over." He looked up from his piece of paper and your jaw dropped.
He laughed a bit as he looked at your phone, the display showing you looking at him while sitting next to eachother.
"You're so weird. How is that an ick?" You asked, you were a bit offended.
"I don't know its just you being sick." gavi answered with the same tone.
"But I love taking care of you when you're sick." you smiled and then pushed back a starnd of his hair that fell onto his forehead. "You're like a little baby then." You smiled while you said that in a high pitched voice and Gavi smiled as he kept eye contact.
"I dont know, it's such an ick seeing you sick." Gavi shrugged his shoulders and you then smiled.
"You get the ick and then you come and cuddle me until I fall asleep. Ah yes, makes sense. Anyways-" You repositioned yourself on the couch and then looked at your paper. You however felt Gavi's eyes piercing into your skin as he smiled a bit.
"I get the ick when you burn the food you were cooking." Gavi's jaw dropped as soon as you said that.
"But the last time you laughed!" He said a bit louder.
"Yeah, after I got the ick." You grinned at him while he pushed his hair back and shook his head.
"You're unbelievable." He scoffed but he still kept that small grin on his face. "I get the ick when you're yelling at me for not tying my shoelaces."
With that your jaw dropped. "Why is that an ick? It's normal to tie your shoelaces, otherwise they wouldn't be there!" You mumbled and then Gavi couldn't help but chuckle.
"You're on your knees in front kf me most of the times, you'll have some spear seconds to tie them for me." Gavi smiled and then looked back onto his piece of paper. You just tried to hide that smile that was building itself on your lips but you blushing was impossible to hide.
"Okay good, I get the ick when you ho like 'i dont know what to wear' and then I have to put you together a fit." Gavi said and then you shook your head while you smiled.
"I love your fits tho, it's so not my style but I love them." You answered while smiling at him.
"Do you think people notice?" Gavi asked while pointing to the camera.
"I don't know, ask them" You suggested but Gavi shook his head as he frowned.
"You do that" He insisted and you turned your head to the camera to speak to it. However just before you could speak you heard Gavi say something.
"I'm not that crazy to be talking to imaginary people." Gavi said in a mocking tone but still with a bit of sarcasm and you burst out laughing.
After you calmed down a bit you sat up straight and looked at the camera again. "Okay, comment or send me some dms which fit's you think were designed by Gavi." You explained and then turned to look at Gavi again.
"You know what I love about you?" You asked and obviously caught Gavi off guard.
"Babe we're filming a video of us telling eachother when we get the ick, and now you're just doing the opposite." Gavi threw his hands in the air while you burst out laughing. He just smiled at you while he shook his head.
"I can't help it," You calmed down again. "It's when you do that high pitched voice, when youre mimicking someone."
"Okay, I get the ick whe-" Gavi ignored what you said but you cut him off.
"Hey, it's my turn!" You told him and he remained silent. "I get the ick when you ignore me." You told him and he just wanted to open his mouth. "No, shush, because if I tell you to get some bread on the way home from practice and you can't answer with an okay or i will, and then get the bread anyways, that fucks my brain. Are you too important to answer my request of bread?" You asked and Gavi laughed.
"No it's just that I often don't have time while I drive." Gavi tried to talk himself out of the situation.
"And while you're in the store? Or do you go to a bread drive-in?!" You asked and Gavi shook his head.
"Okay I'm sorry for not answering you." Gavi apologized and you shook your head.
"It's okay." You smiled. "And I think that was enough for today, you wanna add something to the imaginary people?" You turned to face Gavi.
"Play the trailer."
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karmaajr · 1 month ago
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HEYO Y'ALL!!!! I got bored and decided my last intro post was WAY too unorganised (even by my standards frfr 😔😔🙏) so i made a new one!!! hopefully this ones a bit better or else ima light somebody on fire 🥰🥰
anyways dms n asks r ALWAYS open and if ur new to my person/being/blog/existancewhatevs and wanna get to know me or smth then FEEL FREE TO SLIDE IN GIRLYPOPS!!! I'M ALWAYS BORED SOO 😭😭🙏 (might take like, a billion years to reply tho mbmb >:3)
and thus again, without any further ado, MY INTRO POST 😍
🎶 try to strike a chord but it's probably A MINOR 🎶 -> ✨️im under 18✨️ idm nsfw convos tho bcuz theyre funny :D
sooo tbh you can call me whatever you want? like ppl call me different things (eg senka calls me kam, bea calls me keke/kekere bcuz shes 🎶a meanie, a big meanie🎶 my irl bestie westie pookie poo calls me jeena CUZ HES A LIL BITCH) but MHM!!! CALL ME WHATEVER U WANNA <33 (as long as it dont feel masc bcuz my dumbass got issues w feeling masc for some RANDOM STUPID REASON 💀) (like im literally a cis girl why do i got problems w this....... but YAAAA 😭) (she/her btw!!! if that wasnt obvious!! ^^)
✨️i am cringe but i am free✨️
I SOMETIMES USE GENDERED TERMS LIKE GIRLY/BRO/DUDE/ETC BUT I DON'T MEAN IT GENDERED SO IF YOU FEEL IFFY THEN DONT HESITATE TO HMU N TELL ME TO FIX UP MY SHIT
btw im a tad bit of train wreck but if u enjoy the chaos then we'll get along js fine i think pooks 😋😋
anyways it came to my shitty little attention span one day when i was just being a silly lil girly that some of yall think im white when i say im british....... CHAT NOOO IM BORN N RAISED IN THIS TEA RIDDEN COUNTRY BUT ETHNICITY WISE IM BANGLADESHI!??!?! YALL IM LITERALLY A BROWNIE OMFDS 🤧
also a lot of this blog is a bunch of reblogs of shit im interested in BUT I DO HAVE OG STUFFFFFF, THEY'RE JUST IN THEIR OWN TAGS U GET ME??? anyways some of the tags!!!
karmaajr rambles -> for everything i post besides answers to asks :3
karmaajr answers ig :D -> answers to asks ^^
important thing for me to tag bcuz yes -> random thing i really wanna save (also im bad at tagging so sometimes thing has an "s" or tag has an "s" lmfao, ITS A RLLY USELESS TAG TO TRY SCROLL THRU ICL.... RLLY DRY AS WELL)
karmas mum mentions :3 -> i like to think this one explains itself yall 😘
daddy's unhinged -> anything about my sweet ol' pops (who totes cares abt me yall) 🥰
my sister and I -> anything my sister is involved in that i actually remember to tag LMFAO
NOT MY ASS MENTIONING PANIK -> me wanting to save things that r to do w my gf 🫶
BTW HIS @ IS @panikbutt0n AND SHE'S MY MAPLE SYRUP CHUGGING 4LIFER AND LITERALLY THE BEST THING SINCE RIPPED BREAD AND I LOVE HER SO SO SO MUCH SO ACC HIT HER UP PLZ 🙏🙏🙏🙏
btw yall, ur homegirl aint no gatekeeper so the group matching pfp thingy is from @tuturthecarvroom 's blog (n they very skibidi sbg art btw so i do reccomend frfr) and mY HEADER IS OFF GOOGLE SEARCH 😍😍
ALSO I AM CURRENTLY MATCHING WITH THE SILLIEST GROUP EVER FRFR, GONNA TRY @ THEM ALL BUT IT'S HARDDD (my memory is the shittiest thing since That One Time my friend shit his trousers on call w me 💪💪💪)
@lee1504 -> BRAINROTTED KING 🙏🙏
@d011zk1ll -> both kind af and somewhat unhinged??? like both "do a good deed to make somebody else's life easier ☺️" AND "im gonna eat a bicycle :p"
@sketchingwithlyn -> JUST THE CHILLEST GUY EVERRRR!!!!
@rot-decay-erosion -> gramps 🧓🏻 (also known as the desendant of our king garfield 😙✨️)
@afrogwhocantdraw -> RESIDENT BENLOR POOKIE
@low-senka -> the brokest senior citezen youve ever met 💔💔💔💔 (yall need to donate to my guy 🥺🥺🥺)
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(also the thing below had me stuck looking at it for literally AGES so hehehehehhehehe GET TRAPPED IDIOT!!!!!! >:3!!!!!)
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(dots r fun)
anyways i have no clue what else to write!!! which is weird bcuz im a yapper frfr :D
ANYWAYS LOVE Y'ALL ✨️✨️✨️
WAIT
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.......... ᘛ⁠⁐̤⁠ᕐ⁠ᐷ ⁠⁠
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THEY 👥 DONT🙅🏼‍♀️ LOVE 😘 YOU 🫵🏼 LIKE I 👀 LOVE 🥰 YOU 🫵🏼🫵🏼🫵🏼
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jaydeei1989 · 15 days ago
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hallo hai... not the kinda post i usually make but! wonkytoons has been pulling shit again apparently :-/
heres the information on what theyve done in case ur anware
recently, my friend kritter ( @lets-take-a-polaroid-pic ) messaged me about what wonkytoons has done:
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regarding this i trusted kritter and deleted my reblogs of their art and blocked them. they then went and messaged my art blog, @jdart1923, saying this:
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i read through the post they sent me and replied back, saying that i had read through the post, apologized, explained i had no evidence i had went off of in the first place except for what kritter told me and that i trusted her (since she has been apart of the professor layton for longer than i have and knows more than me). i then went on to say, i still did not want to unblock them because they called me 'very easily influenced and immature just like the rest', as i have the right to do that when i dont want to be around someone so rude for no reason.
i have explained my own response, as i do not have a screenshot of it and wonkytoons had decided to delete the entire conversation.
after this, the same account who made the supposed post 'disproving' the allegations against wonkytoons (as you can see in the link they sent me initially), messaged me about 'being notified about the dm i sent to wonkytoons'. already this is suspicious, because how would somebody else's account be notified by a private message on a seperate person's account? this made me a bit suspicious because that made it sound like they were just a sideblog. this is the full message they sent me:
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none of this at all is correct. i said in my own dm to wonkytoons that i was sorry for blocking them due to false allegations, yet this person has said that i didn't think on my own after being showed this 'evidence'.
again, i had not been shown any evidence for or against wonkytoons prior to the first message. i said that in my message and am saying it again.
i dont even know where i could have been 'wrong' in my initial response either. this entire message from this other blog really just sounds like a load of bullshit to me. it is also very, very apparent this is just wonkytoons' sideblog. even after showing it to kritter, she said the same before i could even say it.
some time after being sent this message, i clicked onto the crafttidalkoala3624 blog and it said the blog had been deleted.
this whole thing is just. really a bit stupid. if wonkytoons even sees this, which i doubt because i've very clearly been blocked by them, i have this to say; what on earth was even the point of reaching out to me of all people? disregarding my apology to you? i said sorry for having not seen evidence for or against you, even though that isnt even my fault at all, and i thanked you for even reading through what i said. which i doubt you did, because you seemingly didnt listen at all which is evident in your responses. you are in your 20's. i am not even 16 yet. grow the fuck up please.
i never want to have to make a post like this again.
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rouge-fauna · 21 days ago
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In this discduo timeline pastebin i read, you can see tommy did care about dream for a very long time even while his friends were trying to convince him that dream was bad, he continued to praise dream and had plans to meet him irl. It wasnt until june july 2023 when tommy started believing the lies his friends and fans kept telling him and thays when he banned the words dream and discduo in his chat and said that he didnt wanna go all the way to florida. I think he genuinly thinks dream wronged him based on his body language in the podcast and how he dissocoates, like tommy now percieves all his past positive interactions with dream as a negative and jack, harry, and tommys fanbase fed into that, but he also is lying about dream with other things. And i mean he could be faking that body language to garner sympathy Im not entirely sure. Im just looking at the nuance here. He knows dream or at least he did. He used to check up on him all the time and he knew how bad dreams mental health was, but he still lies and claims dreams apathetic and thinks dream cant take accountability and thinks dream doesnt care about him when dream has always cared. I can send you that pastebin if u want, u can see the decline in where tommy starts turning against dream its aroundn the time where he and harry got closer. But before that, he saw dream as this brilliant helpful guy and referred to him as a friend, even in the past referred to him as closer than a brother. He cared for dream at some point for a long time, then ditched him and betrayed him. Also dream refers to tommy as emotional, and i can see how someone so sensitive can interpret a long dm as an attack, and apparently he did explain his issue to dream before but it never got resolved or tommys lying about that too. I dont doubt that he is doing a lot of this to get attention, but i do think some feelings could be genuine despite it logically not adding up. I can see how someone could interpret dreams dms in a stressful way. But the fact tommy even gave a shit about dream in the past to begin with makes this worse, because the way i see it, if someone close to me turned on me i would be a lot more hurt by that than if someone i was only colleagues with turned on me.
Was gonna chrck back on their past interactions to see if i can spot anything shady on tommys part if yk what i mean even if this is gonna make me sad. One of my co workers offered to do a watchparty💀
(I should preface this by saying I have not yet watched the podcast, because at the moment I’m little too triggered to even give a shit about what Tommy has to say to be honest. I don’t really see what defense or reasoning you could possibly have for calling anyone, nonetheless your past friend a “proper movie villain” while accusing him of things that aren’t true, knowing the consequences. I mean I just don’t think people have really let that fact truly sink he, Tommy publicly compared Dream to Darth Vader, Bane, The Joker, Voldemort…etc mass murderers. Just think about that for a second. That’s not okay. People are out there comparing him to Hitler and talking about brutal ways to kill him, a go fund me to kill Dream has started. I don’t think there is a damn thing Tommy can say Dream did to excuse that shit, he will get no sympathy from me. Even if Dream physically abused him, which ain’t true since they’ve never met, Dream still shouldn’t be compared to freaking Hannibal.)
Even so, as I have said in some of my past posts on the matter, I do think perhaps Tommy was hurt by something that happened with Dream in the past and in retrospect realized perhaps things weren’t as good as he thought. Which happens, sometimes we look back on things and are like - hey wait a minute that wasn’t okay and that hurt. But that doesn’t make that person a shit person.
The example I believe I previously talked about was my first kiss, but to give another example, a guy I was good friends with freshman year of college was very handsy and I didn’t really realize in the moment how I felt about it or that he was pushing boundaries he shouldn’t. At first I didn’t think much of it. I was naive and autistic and didn’t really know better, and he was too. He didn’t have sisters, hell he thought woman were always making milk lol. In other words, we were both dumb. And looking back he did a lot of things that really were not okay, but once I came to realize and set boundaries he respected them. In fact, we are still kinda friends today, we’re even roomates for a bit after I graduate back in 2023. So, suffice to say, sometimes people can do shitty things or even things that you realize later were not okay, or even things that traumatize you, but that doesn’t make that person shitty. Especially if you didn’t call it out in the moment. This is what I mean by giving Dream the benefit of the doubt, sure I could perceive my friend as manipulative and taking advantage of naivety or whatever, or I recognize that he really just doesn’t know better. Now when you tell someone to stop and then they continue (depending on what it is because ya know old habits die hard or like my adhd is gonna try my hardest but I will inevitably skews up pronouns - just like I screw up everyone’s pronouns) now you’ve entered into the malicious and intentional area.
Bringing it back to Dream, Tommy was upset and told him to stop texting his mother, so Dream apologized to both and stopped. It becomes harassment and malicious if Dream continued over and over to do it, but he didn’t. This is why Dream is frustrated because he doesn’t know what behavior is upsetting people, and in his heart that’s not what he wants to do, but if people don’t tell him how is he meant to improve. At the end of the day, he doesn’t want to offend anyone or hurt someone, that doesn’t mean he hasn’t done so though as these things happen, nobody is perfect.
So I think maybe Tommy was hurt, maybe it was in retrospect looking back, maybe it was friends pointing things out and were like - hey that’s fucked up that happened. Maybe some of that hurt is genuine. And maybe you could make the case that that hurt has spurred him to take revenge and ruin Dream in whatever way it takes. So the jokes and lies are just part of his lashing out because he feels wronged.
However, there is also a case to be made that given Tommy’s history as pointed out by Dream with Logan Paul, maybe it was all an act. Maybe he was using Dream from the start and Dream being the naive, good hearted, autistic guy made an easy target. Maybe he only pretended to be good friends, sure Dream doesn’t have anything to gain from being Tommy’s friend but that doesn’t go both ways. Tommy has a lot to gain from being Dream’s friend, but as the tides turned he had a lot to lose by being Dream’s friend and it was easier to switch sides not that there was no incentive, as Dream pointed out as the USMP fell through so did Tommy switch sides. Once he couldn’t gain clout for being on Dream’s side but being against Dream, he switches. Because a lot of his audience has always been against Dream, struggling to tell the difference between character and person and as is human nature, instinctively hating an autistic person. That has been the case for ages, Tommy could have given into his audience for ages but even during the allegations height he still did that dsmp finale and posted that picture on Twitter (which he got a lot of hate for)…
All I’m saying, is even the people who have wronged me, even the person who pushed me to almost kill myself, I wouldn’t wish death or harassment upon them. I wouldn’t do the shit Tommy has pulled, because there was a time when we were friends. There were times when they were good to me. And maybe that makes me an exception to the rule, that people would be so cruel to the people they once called friends, but I couldn’t and that’s what makes me question Tommy’s sincerity and capacity for empathy…
Though perhaps both can be true.
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