#if you see typos no you don't i'm only french

[eddiediaaz]

Oliver Stark about Buck/Eddie on the Zach Sang Show (04.19.2024) [x]

[imaginespazzi]

Part 14: The End And The Beginning

Masterlist - Part 1 - Part 2 - Part 3 - Part 4 - Part 5 - Part 6 - Part 7 - Part 8 - Part 9 - Part 10 - Part 11 - Part 12 - Part 13

Still a flicker of hope that you first gave to me that I wanna keep (please don't leave)

(In which an infrequently-updating writer finally didn't take a month to update)

Pairing: Paige Bueckers X Azzi Fudd

Themes: Angst, Fluff and I guess a little bit of Hurt/Comfort

Words: 9.2K

TW: Swearing (and I believe that's it)

A/N: Hello my lovelies <3 It's a little past 2 AM but y'all wanted a chapter at an ungodly hour so here it is. It's insane to think that there will only be one more chapter of this fic. In all honestly I did have ways to drag it out for a little longer but ultimately, this felt like the right path to take. I feel like some of this chapter is a little OOC (though my lovely friends have said maybe I'm just being paranoid) but whelp it was for the plot so! Like I said, ungodly hour chapters means barely any editing for now but I will go over and fix things later. In the meantime if y'all wanna point things out in terms of grammar and typos, please feel free. As always, let me know what you liked, what you didn't and what you'd like to see as this story comes to an end. Have a lovely rest of your day (night?) my loves <3

June 2033 

Azzi thinks she might have every detail of her rather uninteresting bedroom ceiling memorized by now. After all -for almost 3 weeks now-  instead of sleeping, all she’s done is stared up at it, her mind wandering off to a thousand places, all plagued with the same face. Azzi hadn’t thought it was possible for her heart to ache as much as it had the morning after the proposal, when the regret had hit and she’d rushed into Paige’s room, only to be told by KK that the older girl was gone. The days following had been torture, like enduring a heart attack over and over again, the pain crescendoing until she’d gone numb from it. 

But last time there had been no false notions, no open-ended goodbyes, just a clean break and somehow that had been easier to live with. These last few days -filled with the unbearable waiting of maybe today she’ll come back to me- have been worse. Perhaps it’s because of the innate hope flickering like a candle within her. And even though the flame of it seems to get smaller and dimmer every time she sees Paige and the older woman still can’t quite make the promise to stay, Azzi knows that until that hope of hers is either completely shattered or fulfilled, there is no moving on from this hurt. 

Sighing to herself, Azzi grabs for her phone. The screen lights up to countless notifications and she bites her lip when she notices the one from Clémence. Dinner had been uncannily awkward last night in a way that it had never been before when the French woman had been a much more frequent presence in her and her daughter’s life. But in between Azzi being completely lost in thoughts of her and Paige’s conversation in the locker room and Stephie somehow managing to find a way to relate every little detail back to Miss Buecks and her face-falling a little every time she did, well it was suffice to say even Clémence’s attempts as making the dinner more cheerful hadn’t been enough to make the evening less of a disaster. Azzi had almost let out a sigh of relief when she’d finally dropped the other woman off at the hotel, trying to not to wince when Clémence had leaned in for a quick kiss on the cheek. But cleary she hadn’t been inconspicuous enough -and neither had Stephie, who’s voice had been rather devoid of her normal Clémence related cheer when she’d wished the Frenchwoman a goodnight- and the guilt from the way the other woman’s smile had faltered, still lingers in Azzi’s stomach. 

Chewing at her bottom lip, she swipes the text open. It’s a simple “it was good to see you two again.” and perhaps it doesn’t mean much -maybe Azzi’s doing that overthinking thing again- but there’s something about the formality of it, about the full stop at the end of the sentence feels rather definite. Azzi almost feels like she should apologize for something, perhaps for being so aloof last night or maybe even more. She knows that Clémence had wanted something else from her, had patiently waited for her to turn their relationship into something beyond just casual, something Azzi had never been ready to give to her. But it almost feels too late for any of that and so all she says is “it was good to see you too.” and she hopes that Clémence knows that despite everything, she means it. 

Throwing her phone back on the dresser and now feeling perhaps even worse than she had a couple minutes ago, Azzi pulls her blanket above her head, almost pleading with her brain to just shut off. She’s about to give into the impulsive urge to scream into her pillows, when instead her door creaks open and she immediately throws the comforter off of herself, reaching over to turn on her bedside lamp as she sits up straight on her bed. 

Stephie stands in the doorway, a fluffy teddy bear cuddled to her chest as she stares up at Azzi with big doey eyes and the older woman’s heart constricts when she sees the hint of sadness sitting heavily within them. Her little girl had been quiet all day -really since dinner last night. With today being a rare off day, the two of them had spent most of it lounging on the couch watching movies. But Azzi could tell something was off about Stephie. Her daughter, normally ever the commentator, had been dead silent, cuddling into her mother’s side and barely even chuckling at the comedy scenes. Truthfully, Stephie hadn’t been quite the same ever since they’d left Paige’s that morning -and with the amount of nights she’d snuck into Azzi’s room since, her mother had almost been expecting it tonight- but it seemed like something else had shifted last night. 

“C’mere baby girl,” Azzi says softly as she holds her arms open and Stephie dutifully climbs into them, burrowing her head into her mother’s chest, “what’s up?”

“Can’t sleep,” comes the muffled response from her daughter as Azzi gently rubs the little girl’s back, “can I sleep here with you?”

Azzi smiles, pressing a gentle kiss against Stephie’s hair, “of course you can sweetheart,” she whispers, before falling back into her pillows with her daughter still securely wrapped in her arms. 

She continues to brush her hands through Stephie’s hair, listening to the sound of her little girl breathing as she hums a lullaby. 

“Mama,” Stephie says tentatively, after a while. 

“Yeah Stephie-bean?”

“Yes-er-day when we were at dinner-,” the little girl swallows nervously and Azzi’s squeezes her shoulders, hoping it conveys that she’s listening, ready to hear whatever it is that’s been bothering the little girl, “yes-er-day at one of the other tables, I saw- I saw a woman with gold hair and she- she had it in a bun like- like the one Miss Buecks usually has.”

Azzi’s breath hitches, “go on sweetheart.”

“And she- she was-,” Stephie drops her voice down to a whisper, “she was kissing someone who looked a lot like you Mama.”

“Oh,” Azzi manages to get out as she feels her lungs compress. 

“And there was a little girl too and they both gave her lots of kisses too,” Stephie’s voice is small as she says the fact and Azzi has to bite her lips hard to keep in the sob that’s threatening to escape her lips. And she remembers the exact people Stephie’s talking about, remembers the way her heart panged as she’d seen the way three of them -the two women and their little girl- were practically giddy around each other. They’d looked almost like an exact replica of Paige, Azzi and Stephie, not that long ago. Azzi had, had to tear her eyes away from the scene, not wanting to let the tears that were dangerously close to her waterline slip down her cheeks. She hadn’t looked in their direction again. But Azzi hadn’t even imagined that maybe Stephie would’ve noticed that too, that her daughter would’ve felt the sting of the happy picture the same way she had. 

“Oh sweetheart-”

“My friend Anya has a Mama and a Mommy,” Stephie rushes out before Azzi can console her any further, “and my other friend Lena didn’t understand how that was poss-ble cause she has a Mommy and a Daddy like most of my other friends but Anya said it’s poss-ble and that her Mama and Mommy love each other just like Lena’s Mommy and Daddy love each other.”

“Anya’s right,” Azzi says softly, smiling at how simple children make everything sound even though she’s not quite sure where Stephie’s getting at with this story, “I’m sure her Mama and Mommy love each other a lot.”

“Anya says they kiss on the lips- just like- just like the women at the restaurant and like Nana and Pops or like Uncle José and Aunty Tully,” Stephie scrunches her nose as she finally untucks herself from Azzi’s chest, “Anya says that’s what people in love do but I think it’s kinda gross cause kissing on the lips looks kinda yucky.”

Azzi laughs, booping the little girl’s nose, “it does look a little funny.”

“But Anya says her Mommy and Mama do other things too. Like her Mama takes care of her Mommy when she’s sick and when her Mama cries over a movie, her Mommy laughs but then gives her Mama a big hug. And Anya says that sometimes when Anya’s Mama isn’t looking, Anya sees her Mommy looking at her Mama with a big smile,” Stephie stretches out her arms for emphasis as she climbs off of Azzi’s lap to sit on the bed next to her. 

“That sounds sweet,” Azzi says wistfully, still a little confused why she’s being told everything about Anya’s two mothers. 

There’s a moment of silence before Stephie drags in a deep breath as she stares intently at her mother, “I never seen you and Miss Buecks kiss, Mama.”

Her words loom in the air as Azzi’s mouth falls open, everything suddenly beginning to click, “Steph-”

“But when Miss Buecks was sick, I saw you make her soup and make her eat her med-cines even though Miss Buecks said they tasted yucky. And when you cry over Mr. Olaf melting in Frozen, Miss Buecks always says ‘Az you’re so silly, you’ve seen this so many times. How can you still cry at it?’”Stephie recites, doing an almost perfect impression that has Azzi’s letting out something in between a sob and a laugh. 

“But then she gives you a big hug anyways. And Mama,” the little girl continues, “when you’re not looking, I see Miss Buecks looking at you with this big, big, big, smile all the time.” 

“Stephie,” Azzi chokes out, trying to hold herself together. 

Her daughter looks at her with something almost like wonder, “you and Miss Buecks- you were just- you were just like Anya’s Mama and Mommy?”

“Yeah,” Azzi whispers, as she grasps the little girl’s hands in her own, bracing herself for whatever Stephie might say next, “yeah I guess we were.”

But Stephie doesn’t say anything for a while, sitting all quiet and contemplative for a moment until she slowly climbs back into her mother’s arms, resting her head right against Azzi’s chest. 

“Mama,” her voice is small when she finally does speak, “I really miss Miss Buecks.”

Azzi feels her heart constrict, finally losing the battle against her tears as they drip down her cheeks, and she tightens her grip on her daughter, “I know baby. I really miss her too.”

*** 

April 2025

“What are you doing?” panic filters into Azzi’s tone as she watches Paige slowly get down on one knee, her heart pulsating as she slowly begins to understand why her girlfriend had set this whole thing up. Really she should’ve known as soon as KK and Ice had excitedly bound into her room, mischievous knowing smirks on their faces as they’d made her change into something nice before practically dragging her onto the roof. She should’ve known when she’d seen the candles and the pink roses and Paige just a little too dressed up in the midst of it all, that this was more than just one of the older girl’s lavishly planned date nights. 

Paige smiles up at her, either not hearing the distress in the brunette’s voice or perhaps not quite understanding the gravity of it. She reaches for Azzi’s hands, soft fingers entwining with the younger girl’s like their holding onto a lifeline. An unfamiliar sensation builds in Azzi’s stomach, one she doesn’t think she’s ever felt in Paige’s presence before.  

“Paige,” she whispers helplessly. 

“I’ve got you baby,” Paige squeezes her hands gently, mistaking whatever it is that Azzi’s feeling, for simple nerves. 

But it’s not that. Azzi knows this unsettling feeling that’s tornadoing around her isn’t just nerves or butterflies or whatever else it is that one normally feels before a proposal. It’s something much, much worse. Something almost like dread. And Azzi can feel all those suppressed emotions that have been building for the last couple of weeks-the whispers of thoughts that she’d brushed away as nothing serious- suddenly rushing through her body and settling like a large, immovable lump at the back of her throat. 

She remembers the first time she’d felt it, that unfamiliar twist in her stomach. It had been at a press conference after some easily won Big East game with UConn’s Big Three sitting diligently at the media-table. And it had suddenly occurred to Azzi, just as they’d finished their media availability, that she’d been asked exactly one question about her own performance -a respectable 24/4/3 statline- from the pool of reporters. Every other question of the four that had been directed her way, had been about Paige. She’d come to a stop outside the press room, letting herself sit with the thought for a second until her girlfriend -with her bright blue eyes and just-for-Azzi smile- had come bounding up to her. And suddenly, as it always seemed to be when it came to Paige, Azzi couldn’t think about anything else anymore. Not when the blonde was lacing their fingers together and putting her lips dangerously close to her ears, whispering all the sinful things they could get up to that night.

But then it happened again two games later. One question about her own performance followed by a cycle of questions about Paige during a presser where the blonde wasn’t even in attendance. This time Azzi had thought about it a little longer but then she’d chided herself for it, chalking it up to her brain doing that overthinking thing again. It was natural to be asked about teammates, especially superstar, generational, teammates who were likely to go #1 in the upcoming WNBA draft. 

And then it happened again. 

And again. 

And again. 

Until it was the Elite Eight and Azzi found herself, after a 28/5/4 statline and two clutch free throws to win it all, still somehow fielding more questions about Paige -and how the blonde had impacted Azzi’s game and recovery and their relationship as best friends- than about her own performance. 

That’s when she’d finally begun to understand what that twist in her stomach had been. She’d felt sick at the idea that it could be envy -how could she ever be jealous of her Paige’s success- but she’d understood then, almost gawking at the reporter who’d had the audacity to ask her, her fourth Paige-related question that night, that it wasn’t that. Maybe it would’ve been easier if it was. 

It was fear. 

The fear that her own identity in the basketball world was slowly withering away under the weight of her relationship. 

“Hey,” Paige’s voice feels like it’s coming from a distance even though she’s right in front of Azzi and the brunette swallows hard as she tries to pry herself away from her thoughts to focus on her girlfriend. 

“Paige,” she whispers back helplessly, as her eyes begin to water. 

Every time Azzi had imagined Paige proposing -the first time had been when she was 15 and she’d woken up from the dream, almost shaking but still filled with the serene calmness that came from knowing something was inevitable- she had always in fact pictured tears in her own eyes. 

But not like this. 

Because these little droplets cascading down her cheeks that Paige’s fingers diligently reach up to wipe away aren’t the tears of a girl whose dreams to marry her best friend -the love of her life- are coming true. They’re the tears of a girl who’s bracing herself for an inevitable fight when she puts her career before a relationship, when her head wins this fight against her heart. 

Blissfully unaware, Paige continues on, “I’ve um- I’ve thought of this a million times. Actually maybe a billion or a trillion or quadrillion. Point is I’ve been thinking about it pretty much ever since I met you.”

Stop, Azzi thinks but all that comes out is a whimper. 

“So you’d think, considering I’ve thought about it that many times, I’d have an actual speech prepared or something. And I did you know. I uh- I wrote one and then I hated it so I deleted it all and then I wrote another and then I deleted that one too,” Paige laughs and the sound of it, that had once felt like a warm blanket shrouding all of Azzi’s senses, now feels a lot like a wintry chill settling around her body. 

“And what I realized,” there’s moisture pooling in the blonde’s own eyes now, “is that I don’t need a speech. I don’t need hundreds of words. I just need three. I love you,” Paige presses a kiss against Azzi’s knuckles and the other girl shudders, “I love you so fucking much Azzi Fudd. And I’m gonna love you for the rest of my life.”

She lets go of the brunette’s hands to retrieve a black velvet box from her pockets and Azzi bites her lip so hard, the metallic taste of blood overwhelms her taste buds. 

“Azzi Jazlyn Fudd,” Paige says softly, flicking open the box to reveal a heart-cut diamond ring, “will you marry me?”

“No,” it comes out so soft, almost blending with the wind, that for a second even Azzi doubts she’d said it. 

“”What?”

Azzi clears her throat, “no.”

“No?” Paige repeats, blinking up at her with a mixture of confusion and anticipatory dread. 

“No,” Azzi says again, her voice much stronger now as she takes a step back, the tears freely falling from her cheeks. 

“I don’t- I don’t understand,” Paige, still on one knee, stumbles a little as she tries to formulate the right words, “you- you don’- no?,” her eyebrows furrow in confusion, “you don’t want to marry me?”

I do, Azzi wants to scream. 

“I can’t,” she says. 

Paige stares up at her, something akin to disbelief etched across her beautiful features, “what does that even fucking mean you can’t?”

“I just-” Azzi struggles against the jumble of thoughts in head as she tries to piece together a coherent sentence, “I can’t.”

“Bullshit,” Paige snarls. 

“Paige-”

“Do not Paige me,” the older girl seethes, her expression darkening, “you better fucking explain yourself.”

“I- I will,” Azzi stutters, trying to make herself small as she wraps her arms around herself, “can you- just,” she eyes Paige, who’s still kneeling one one knee, “can you please- please just stand up.”

Paige flinches, like Azzi has asked her to shoot an arrow into her own soul. And maybe she had. But she does as asked. The blonde’s movements are reluctant, almost like it pains her to stand up and when she does, the distance she puts between her and Azzi can’t be more than a few meters, but it feels like it stretches the length of an ocean. 

“Explain,” Paige says scathingly.

“I just-” Azzi takes in a deep breath, barely able to meet her girlfriend’s eyes as she forces out the next words, “I don’t want to be known as just your wife.”

Paige lets out an expected noise of protest, “you wouldn’t-”

“You don’t know that,” Azzi cuts her off with a pointed look, “because right now- right now sometimes it feels like all I am is just Paige Bueckers’ best friend. It doesn't matter how many points I score or how many defensive moves I make on the court or whatever else I do on the court, somehow it all leads back to you. And it makes me feel-,” she chokes on the next words, the acidity of them leaving a bitter taste in her mouth, “I feel invisible.”

“Azzi-”

The brunette holds up a hand, needing to finish what she’s saying before she fully succumbs to her emotions, “sometimes- sometimes my entire career at UConn so far feels like- like it’s just an extension of yours. Paige you- you get to be Paige. Just Paige. The superstar. You get to go to entire pressers not having to answer a single question about me or our friendship. You get to have entire articles written about you that have just a throwaway line about me and not have half of it be dedicated to how I’m the driving force behind your success. And that’s how it should be because- because as much as we rely on each other, your success is still yours. But sometimes it feels like mine isn’t mine.”

“I’m sor-”

“No!” Azzi cuts Paige off loudly when the older girl tries to apologize, guilt flashing in her eyes, “it’s not your fault Paige. You- you’re my biggest cheerleader. You always have been. But I just- I need to have my own identity. And that’s already been so hard being known as just your best friend. It’s only going to get worse if I-” she stops, unable to say the rest but even unspoken, it lingers in the air. 

If I become your fiancé. 

 “I need next year to be different,” Azzi says instead, “I need it to be my year. Just mine. Just for once, I just want to be known as Azzi.”

“It will be,” there’s a newfound conviction replacing the previous anger in the blonde’s voice as she takes a deliberate step towards Azzi. Bolstered when the other girl doesn’t instinctively move back, she takes another one and then another and another, until the seemingly never-ending distance between them disappears. 

“I understand where you’re coming from,” Paige says softly as she gently holds one of Azzi’s hands between her own, “and I hate- I hate that you feel this way. But it’ll be different next year when we’re not on the same team anymore right? Out of sight out of mind type shit? They won’t- they won’t ask you about me or make everything you do about me anymore-”

“You don’t know that-”

The older girl continues like she didn’t hear the interruption, “I just- I just don’t understand why you can be known as my girlfriend but not my-” she swallows, “but not my wife? Because Az- when we come out-,” the girl in questions flinches and Paige pauses, her expression falters at the movement. 

A deadly silence clouds the air and it’s April in Connecticut and the spring breeze is just the right temperature. But as Paige slowly lets go of her hands, realization dawning on her face, Azzi thinks she’s never felt colder in her life. 

“You- you don’t-” the blonde looks at her almost accusingly as she takes a step back, “you don’t want to come out?”

“Paige-”

“Answer the fucking question Azzi.”

Azzi casts her eyes downwards, digging her fingers as deeply into her palms as possible, “no, no I don’t.”

“I see,” Paige says slowly, her tone dangerously low, “and how long have you felt this way Az?”

“I-I-” the brunette stutters nervously, “I made- I made the decision after the Elite Eight.”

“That’s not what I asked,” Paige says calmly. 

“I don’t- I don’t understand-”

“How long Azzi?” the blonde sneers, “how long have you had all the fucking doubts about your identity and our relationship? How long have you been questioning everything about us? How long have you bee going through this whole fucking decision-making process about our future?”

“That’s not-”

“Oh no,” Paige interrupts harshly, “that’s exactly it. That’s exactly what you were doing. So tell me. How. Long?”

Azzi gulps nervously, “since the game at home versus Nova.”

Paige blinks at her, “three months? Three fucking months Azzi. You’ve been feeling this way for three months and you didn’t once think that maybe you should tell me? That maybe we should talk about it?”

“I didn’t know,” Azzi says helplessly, “I didn’t even understand it myself Paige. I didn’t know what I was feeling. I didn’t even know there was something to discuss.”

“But clearly you did figure it out, Azzi. Because I know you and I know you didn’t make this decision without figuring your emotions out, so why not come to me then? Why not tell me as soon as possible. God fucking hell Azzi- when even were you gonna tell me?” Paige yells, all pretence of calm gone from her body, “if I- if tonight hadn’t happened, when would you have even told me?”

Azzi doesn’t say anything and Paige shakes her head, starting to pace around the rooftop. 

“We had a plan Azzi. We’ve had a plan for four years. As soon as one or both of us was out of UConn, that was it. No more hiding. No more secrets. Just you and and me and we weren’t gonna care who the fuck knew about it,” the blonde pinches the bridge of her nose, “and you’re telling me that for three month- three fucking months- you’ve been questioning that whole fucking plan while I remained oblivious as fuck? Azzi all I’ve done these past few months is tell you how fucking excited I was about being able to call you my girl in front ov everyone. How excited I was to hold you in public and for us to just be us without giving a fuck who could see. And you just,” Paige’s voice breaks, “you let me. You let me do all of that- feel all of that. You let me be hopeful for a future that you weren’t even sure you could see for us.”

Azzi looks away, that rock of guilt settled in her stomach starting to get heavier and heavier with each word that leaves Paige’s mouth, “I’m just asking for a little bit more time Paige.”

“And what happens if that time doesn’t go the way you want it to Az?” Paige asks sadly, “what if we survive the next year but you decide that you can’t be attached to me to start your W career?”

“That won’t happen-”

“You don’t know that,” a sardonic smile appears on the blonde’s face, “I can’t keep hiding forever Azzi. All I’ve done is love you in secret. I can’t- I don’t- I won’t do that forever.”

“I’m not asking you to,” Azzi bursts out, her defensiveness suddenly translating into a burst of anger, “I am asking you for a little bit of time. Not even a whole year anymore. Just a little bit of time for me to establish my own identity and honestly Paige if you can’t even give me that- if you can’t understand why I need this time- then maybe-” she stops herself, eyes widening at the words -word she’d never even expected herself to think of - that are now sitting, like burning embers, on the tip of her tongue. 

“Then maybe what?” Paige asks slowly, but there’s an almost resigned tinge to her tone that suggests she already knows. 

“No,” Azzi shakes her head, turning away from the older girl’s piercing gaze. She looks down at the ground, still covered in rose petals. The wax of the glittering candles littered between them has melted onto them, causing their pink hue to turn into a darker shade of red. And it’s like there’s blood scattered on the remnants of Paige’s perfect proposal. 

“Say it Azzi-”

“No-”

“Say it.”

“I don’t want to,” Azzi covers her ears and she wishes this were a nightmare, wishes she could open her eyes and find herself waking up in Paige’s arms. Warm and soft and loved. 

“Godfuckingdammit Azzi,” Paige yells, “just say it. If I can’t understand why you need time then maybe we should what?” she repeats, waiting for the brunette to finish her own sentence. 

Azzi whimpers, continuing to shake her head, “Paige please.”

“Just. Fucking. Say. It.”

The younger girl swallows, “then maybe we should end it.”

Another beat of silence. 

“Maybe we should,” Paige’s voice is gravelly and Azzi doesn’t dare turn around, not ready to see the heartbroken expression -or worse, perhaps the nonchalant one- on the older girl’s face, “if after all we’ve been through, if it’s so easy for you to think those words. Then maybe we should- maybe we should end it.”

And Azzi thinks for the rest of her life she will wonder what she should have done next. If she should’ve said something or if -when she hears those retreating footsteps- if she should’ve run after her. She thinks, for the rest of her life, she will look back on this moment and dissect every single second of it, that she will wish for the time machine to go back and stop herself from doing and saying so many of the things she had on the rooftop that night. 

But Paige walks away. 

And Azzi doesn’t do anything to stop her. 

It isn’t until the morning after -when her head does finally catch up to her heart and all she can feel is that unfamiliar sting of regret- and she races into the apartment downstairs and Ice’s expression is filled with sadness and KK’s glare is filled with accusation, that she finds out just how far Paige had gone away from her and Azzi realizes, she’s just a little too late. 

*** 

June 2033 

There’s a redhead and a brunette, holding hands and chatting quietly as they wait outside the school. The two women are clearly entrenched in their own world -sharing those warm gazes and bright smiles that Azzi’s just a little too familiar with- blissfully unaware that they are currently being stared at. Actually, perhaps glared at is a more accurate statement because there’s a clear tinge of envy running down Azzi’s spine as her eyes remain laser-focused on the scene in front of her. She hadn’t meant to be doing this of course -nobody really plans to come to pick up their daughter from school and somehow end up stink-eying said daughter’s friends parents for being too in love. But as fate would have it, somehow from where she’s parked, Azzi has a perfect view of Anya, infamous Mommy and Mama. 

They’re sickeningly cute.

And Azzi fucking hates them.  

It’s unfair of her to feel this way; she knows that. But watching them lead the life she’d always imagined for herself, is more difficult now than it ever has been when Azzi had seen them before in passing. Back then, it was just a dull ache of something she craved but knew she’d turned away herself. But now- now she’s had a taste of that life; had gotten to live it out -even if just for a second- with the girl she’d always dreamed of living it with. Until one night and a series of revelations had snatched it all away, and now Azzi’s left with nothing but the bitter feeling of waiting to see if she’ll get that back forever or if it had really only ever been meant to be a fleeting moment in her life. 

A sigh of longing escapes her as she watches Anya go rushing into her mothers’ arms, the two of them catching her in perfect sync. She has the resentful urge to scoff at the scene. It’s all so goddamn dramatic for three people who see each other every day. Except Azzi’s mind is filled with memories that are almost exact replicas of the scene in front of her; just with different faces. 

“Hi Mama,” it isn’t until the backdoor opens and Stephie’s voice fills the car that Azzi finally tears her eyes away from Anya’s family. 

“Hey baby,” she choruses back, turning around in her seat to make sure her daughter is buckling herself in correctly, “how was your day?”

“It was okay,” Stephie shrugs and Azzi feels her heart plummet at how nonchalant the little girl sounds. She misses the sound of her daughter ranting about just how booooring school is, and thinks she wouldn’t even try to reprimand her if Stephie deemed school useless like she used to. Azzi just wants her ball of sunshine, talks-a-mile-per-minute child back because this meek, quiet little girl in the back feels like a shell of who Stephie used to be. 

“You excited for Mama’s game tonight?” Azzi presses as she starts to back out of the parking lot, almost relieved when it seems to cause Stephie to sit up a little straighter. 

“You’re- you’re playing the Liberty right?” the little girl asks quietly, “that’s- that’s where Miss Buecks wanna go? New York?”

Azzi freezes at the question, trying to keep her hands steady on the wheel as she hums in agreement. 

“They’re a good team right? Lots of champ-ships and stuff?” Stephie continues. 

“Yeah,” Azzi clears her throat, “it’s uh- it’s definitely gonna be a good game.”

“Anya’s Grammy and Grandpa live in New York. Not the city-city but close to it,” Stephie says after a moment, “Anya says New York’s really nice. She’s been there lots and lots of times to see her Grammy and Grandpa forChristmas. And she- she says when she went, it snowed lots and lots.”

Despite herself Azzi smiles as her mind drifts to memories of cold Northeast winters. For the most part, they had been filled with dreary chills and darky rainy days. But then amidst it all, there had been a couple rare days of snow and when she’d been at UConn, her teammates had taken full advantage. And just like most of her memories of those years, Paige is front and center of these ones too. The blonde had never been nearly as enamored with the snow as Azzi was, and she definitely wasn’t enamored by it at seven in the morning when the brunette would wake her up squealing that it had in fact snowed and the world around them was white. Despite her grumbling, Paige had still let Azzi bundle the both of them up in winter clothes and drag her outside. And her faux irritated expression hds slowly morphed into one of admiration as she’d flicked the snow off the younger girl’s eyelashes, pulling her closer by her scarf because Azzi I’m so cold, you have to kiss me to keep me warm baby. 

“We don’t get snow here,” Stephie says thoughtfully, unaware of the path down memory lane her mother had just taken. 

“No, no we don’t,” Azzi says, almost wistfully. 

“It would- it would be nice to live somewhere with lots of snow,” Stephie ponders out loud and her mother’s eyes widen as she starts to understand where this is going, “like- like in New York.”

“We could- we could have snowball fight and make snowmen like Mr. Olaf and snow angels and everything else you do in snow,” the little girl’s voice gets increasingly more and more high-pitched in excitement, “it would be so fun Mama.”

“Steph-”

“And Anya said that- that- that- she’d even visit me like she visits her Grammy and Grandpa. She promised Mama, she promised she’d come see me if I lived in New York-”

“Honey no,” Azzi cuts her daughter off heartbrokenly, “we are not going to live in New York. 

“But Mama, Miss Buecks-”

“Stephie stop-”

“No Mama listen,” Stephie protests indignantly, “Mama what if- what if Miss Buecks really needs to be in New York. What if it’s impo-tant. And that’s- that’s why she can’t stay here. With us. Not cause she doesn’t want to but cause she can’t. But Mama just because Miss Buecks can’t say doesn’t mean we can’t go Mama.”

“Sweetheart-”

“And you- you just said the Liberty is a good team and you’re such a good player Mama. I think you’d be good on their team too. And I- I really, really like the Valk-ries and I would really miss Aunty J and Aunty Tessie and Aunty Joy but if you- if you and Miss Buecks played for the Liberty- I know I’d like them too. And I’m sure Nana and Pops and Uncle Jon and Uncle Jose and Aunty Tully would come visit us lots and lots and I wouldn’t even miss them lots cause they’d visit so much. I just know it. It could work Mama- I know it could.”

“Stephanie,” Azzi's voice is louder than she’d meant it to be as she pulls onto their street, “sweetheart, we are not moving to New York.”

“But Mama-” the little girl whines. 

“No Stephie. That’s just-” Azzi swallows the sob stuck in her throat, “that’s now how the world works.”

“But what if I want it to work that way?” Stephie asks softly with all the innocence of a five-year old as she meets her mother’s eyes in the rearview mirror. 

“Oh baby,” Azzi’s so caught up in her daughter’s earnest wishful thinking that she doesn’t even notice there’s another oh-so-familiar car parked in her driveway until she almost crashes into it. 

“That’s Miss Buecks car,” Stephie whispers softly, craning her neck to get a better view. Her eyes widen in tandem with her mother’s as they both catch sight of the same thing at the same time. 

It’s Paige. 

Paige, whose eyes are sunken in and red-rimmed. Paige, whose hair is tossed back into a messy bun -looking like it’s been in that same one for days- with little loose strands falling out of it. Paige, whose entire body is hunched over as she sits on their front porch, holding a grey hoodie close to her chest. Paige, whose hands are fidgeting with themselves because she can never sit still, especially when she’s nervous. Paige, who looks up just as Azzi parks her car -whose staring at the both of them like they’re still her everything. Paige, who despite it all, still looks like the most beautiful woman in the world. 

Paige, who’s here. 

It’s Stephie who recovers from the shock of seeing Paige first, the click of her seatbelt being unclasped pulling Azzi out of her own trance. The little girl pushes her door open, getting out of her car seat with quickness as she stumbles out of the car. 

“Careful sweetheart,” Azzi calls out immediately but Stephie isn't listening, already rushing up the pathway as Paige -her expression hopeful- stands up at the sight of the child running towards. 

It isn’t until Stephie hesitates, coming to a halt just a couple of meters away from Paige, that Azzi draws in a deep breath and gets out of the car herself. Unlike her daughter, her steps are much slower, her movement hesitant and guarded. She knows this is it; knows that this is when all that waiting she’s done in the past few weeks will finally be over, that Paige is either here to fulfill a dream or to start a nightmare. 

Azzi walks up the pathway until she’s right behind Stephie, one of her hands instinctively reaching out to hold her daughter’s shoulder, conveying two messages. One to Stephie, a promise that no matter what happens now, she’ll still always have Azzi. The other to Paige is an unspoken message from a protective mother, silently begging her that if she is here to break their hearts, to break Stephie’s gently. 

“Hi,” Paige’s voice is croaky when she speaks, her eyes flickering nervously between the mother and daughter in front of her. 

Azzi clears her throat, willing herself to reply, “hey,” she pauses, continuing only when the older woman keeps her own mouth shut, shuffling her feet nervously, “do you- do you want to come in?”

“Yes,” Paige says, her cheeks reddening at how quickly the word leaves her mouth and that almost makes Azzi smile. 

She nods at the older woman, her hand travelling from Stephie’s shoulder to instead hold her hand as they walk up the steps together. Azzi’s shoulder brushes against Paige’s as she moves past the blonde to open her door and electricity courses through her veins. From the way Paige gasps, the brunette is sure she must’ve felt it too. It crackles in the air as Azzi unlocks the door, her brain feeling foggy at the mere feeling of having Paige so close after so long. 

The three of them walk quietly towards the living room, Stephie’s hands still clasped in Azzi’s and Paige following closely behind them. The little girl’s grip is tight and despite how young she is, Azzi knows just how perceptive Stephie is. She’s just as aware of this moment as the adults are, realizes it just as much as they do, that they’ve reached a crossroad and the path they take -a path determined by whatever Paige chooses- will shape their future together or apart. 

“I um- I- well- the thing is- I-,” Paige breaks the silence first, stuttering over her words before letting out a soft sigh She closes her eyes for a second and when she opens them, there are little droplets of water on the edges of her eyelashes. 

“I really missed you guys,” she confesses in a whisper, her voice breaking throughout. 

There’s a second of silence as her words linger in the air and Azzi feels Stephie’s hand slip away from her own and the little girl almost stumbles over her own feet as she races towards Paige, the older woman’s arms immediately opening to catch her and as she kneels down to pull Stephie into her her chest. It’s like the blonde’s confession had broken a dam, and the water that came rushing through it, had washed away the last little bit of pretence of nonchalance that Stephie had been holding onto. 

For the last few weeks, every time Azzi’s little girl had seen Paige, be it when she accompanied her mother to a practice or when she was on the sidelines at a game, Stephie had ignored the blonde, maintaining the same angry façade as the one she’d had the morning after that night. But Azzi had seen that resolve weaken over time; had seen Stephie’s eyes linger just a little bit longer on Miss Buecks with that familiar look of yearning. And Azzi had known that resolve was almost completely gone, in the car, when Stephie had all but begged her to consider moving to New York if that was the only way they were going to be able to keep Paige in their lives. 

She feels her own set of tears prickling in her eyes as she takes in the scene in front of her. Stephie’s face is pressed into Paige’s neck, the blonde has one arm wrapped around the little girl’s waist and the other other gently brushing through her hair. Their grip on each other is tight with barely any space for air between them, tears freely streaming down both of their faces. 

“I missed you too Miss Buecks,” Stephie sobs and Azzi notices the way Paige’s hold on her tightens at the familiar nickname, “missed you so much.”

“Me too Stephie-bean,” Paige affirms as she coaxes the little girl’s face out of her neck, cupping it in her hands, “I’m so sorry sweetheart. So, so, sorry. I missed you so, so, so, so much,” she says, punctuating each word with a kiss to Stephie’s face in between. 

“Miss Buecks,” Stephie looks down nervously, her fingers playing with the collar of Paige’s t-shirt, “can me and Mama come to New York with you?”

“Stephie!” Azzi exclaims as Paige’s eyes widen. 

“Wh-what?” the blonde asks softly as she searches the little girl’s face in confusion.

“I don’t want you to go,” Stephie says quietly, “but if you have to- then can we come with you?”

“Oh sweetheart,” there’s disbelief in Paige’s tone, something almost akin to awe as she tilts Stephie’s chin to make the little girl look back at her. 

“My friend Anya says New York’s nice,” Stephie rambles, repeating what she’d been telling her mother in the car, “and-and-and she says there’s lots and lots of snow and I told Mama that I think it will be nice to live in lots and lots of snow. Mama hasn’t said yest,” the little girl briefly looks back at Azzi with a sheepish look on her face before turning back to Paige, “but I know- I know we could cov-ince her because Miss Buecks, Mama’s missed you so, so, so much too.”

“Has she?” Paige asks, her eyes flickering to Azzi who’s trying desperately to keep her face neutral as she keeps her own gaze firmly fixated on a picture of her daughter on top of the mantle. 

“She has,” Stephie confirms, before using a finger against the older woman’s cheek to get her to return her attention back to her, “so can we come with you? Please.”

Paige slowly tucks a strand of hair behind the child’s ears as she shakes her head, “no.”

“N-no?” Stephie’s bottom lip trembles at the rejection, “why not? Why can’t we go to New York with you?”

“Because nobody’s going to New York, Stephie-bean,” Paige says firmly and Azzi’s eyes shoot towards the blonde, her lips parting slightly as she processes the meaning behind her words, her heart beginning to race with anticipation. 

“Nobody?” Stephie repeats as a question, her little voice filled with hope. 

Instead of answering, Paige grabs the grey hoodie she’d brought with her that had fallen to the ground. She gently un-scrunches it, holding out the sleeve of it for Stephie to look at. Azzi cranes her head curiously to get a better look of it, squinting her eyes when she notices something written in washed-out black ink. 

“You probably don’t remember this because you were a lot littler when it happened,” there’s a teasing smile of Paige’s face as she uses the incorrect word, “but the first time you ever spoke to me properly, you told me, that your Mama says that one day, you’re gonna be an even better basketball player than she is.”

Stephie beams, “Mama says I’m gonna be the best in the world today.”

Paige chuckles, “I believe it and I believed it then too. That’s why,” she points down at the hoodie, her fingers brushing over the material so delicately, like it’s one of her most treasured possessions, “that’s why I had you sign my hoodie.”

“You asked for my auto-graph?” Stephie’s eyes glint and perhaps she doesn’t quite remember what Paige is talking about exactly, but Azzi can tell that it’s stirred up recollections of something. 

“Yeah- yeah I did. And you said, ‘silly Miss Buecks, I’m not famous’ and I said, ‘but if you’re as good at basketball as you say you are, then one day, you will be. Just like me and your Mama.’ And I meant it. You’re gonna be so- so great one day sweetheart. I know you are,” Paige says with conviction as her thumbs lightly caressing Stephie’s cheeks, “and I- I wanna be right here every step of the way, I wanna be right here to watch you grow up and become the great player -the great woman- that you’re destined to be.”

“You mean it?” Stephie asks, her eyes shining with a fresh new set of tears.

Paige nods, delicately wiping her thumbs under the little girl’s lower eyelid, “I do. I wanna be here, with you and- and your Mama,” she raises her head toward Azzi, mustering a watery smile, “I want to stay. Forever. If you’ll have me.”

Azzi lets out a staggered breath she didn’t know she’d been holding as her eyes remain locked with Paige’s. And suddenly, after eight years spent feeling unfulfilled -eight years spent with this constant sense of being incomplete-, hearing Paige finally say she wants to stay forever, feels a little bit like as if that missing part of Azzi has finally returned back to where it rightfully belongs. 

A loud squeal echoes throughout the living room as Stephie leaps back into Paige’s arms, a large smile stretching the length of her whole face as she buries her face back into the crevice between the blonde’s shoulder and her neck. 

“Yes, yes, yes,” the little girl chirps excitedly, “of course we’ll have you. Of course, of course, of course,” Stephie says in delight before she turns herself slightly in Paige’s grasp, arms still around the other woman’s neck as she looks imploringly at Azzi, “right Mama?”

Azzi doesn’t say anything, pursing her lips as she tears her gaze away from the two people in front of her. 

“Mama?” Stephie presses. 

“Give me a second Stephie-bean,” Paige whispers to the little girl, bumping her head against her temple. 

From the corner of her eyes, Azzi watches as the blonde disentangles herself from Stephie, before slowly getting to her feet and walking towards the younger woman. 

“Az-”

“It’s been almost three weeks-”

“It’s been two weeks, six days, five hours and around fourteen minutes,” Paige shrugs, a hint of a smile playing on her face, “give or take a few minutes.

Azzi continues to look away from her, trying to keep her face devoid of emotion, “still took you a really long time to decide you were gonna stay.”

“Well I’m an idiot,” Paige says matter-of-factly and Stephie snickers behind her, “you know me Az. Sometimes these things- they take me a little while to understand.”

“I told you we wouldn’t wait forever,” Azzi says softly. 

“I didn’t make you wait forever,” Paige reaches out to gently grab her chin between her thumb and index, turning the brunette’s face towards her, “just needed a little bit of time.”

“You didn’t give me time,” Azzi accuses and the blonde flinches. 

“I know. I- I should’ve. Should’ve don’t a lot of things differently when it comes to us but I didn’t and I- I can’t change that but Azzi, I promise, I promise I’ll do everything right this time,” keeping one hand cupped around Azzi’s cheek, Paige uses the other to guide one of the brunette’s hands to rest against her chest, “I swear.”

Azzi swallows, feeling the quick rhythm of Paige’s heartbeat under her fingertips, “how do I know you won’t run away again?”

“Because I trust you,” the blonde whispers, “I trust you to stay and I trust you not to break my heart again. And that- that doesn’t mean that I’m not scared anymore- cause I am. Not a lot but definitely still a little bit. But someone once told me that, trusting is really scary but that maybe- maybe it would be a lot less scary, if we did together.”

“They sound like a really smart person,” Azzi bites her lip, “you should probably listen to them more often.”

Paige chuckles, “well if uh- if they give me the chance, I think I’d listen to them for the rest of my life.”

Azzi shudders and she doesn’t know if it’s from the earnestness of the words spoken or the strength of the emotions in the blonde’s gaze that’s still completely transfixed on her. 

“What about New York?” she asks finally. 

“I called the whole thing off,” Paige states nonchalantly, “I had Talia call Jonathan Kolb last night and I explained everything to Ohemaa this morning. Everyone’s on the same page. There is no deal anymore.”

“You-” Azzi gapes at the girl in front of her, “you- you already called the whole thing off?”

“I did,” Paige confirms, not a hint of regret in her voice, “I don’t need an escape plan.”

“You called it off before even talking to me?” Azzi asks, knitting her eyebrows together, “you didn’t even know how this was gonna go.”

“I already told you. I trust you,” Paige says simply, “I believe in us Az and I really hope you still believe in us too.”

The words are barely out of Paige’s mouth before Azzi’s crashing into her, the weight of her body sending the blonde staggering back a few steps before her hands steadily secure themselves around the younger woman’s waist. A slightly surprised gasp escapes Paige until the sound of it is stolen by Azzi pressing her lips against the older woman’s. Despite her initial surprise, Paige kisses Azzi back with equal fervor, both of them pouring the myriad of suppressed emotions between them the last few weeks into it. And it feels like a cliché, like coming home. 

“Wait, wait, wait,” Paige breaks away first, eyes widening as she slowly turns around to look at Stephie who’s practically vibrating with happiness as she watches the two of them, “Stephie-”

“She already knows,” Azzi says with a slight grin, shaking her head fondly at just how joyful her little girl looks. 

 “You told her?” Paige looks between the mother and daughter. 

Stephie smirks triumphantly, “I figured it out myself Miss Buecks.”

“Of course you did smarty pants,” Paige smiles at the little girl but Azzi knows her well enough -is still so in tune with every little bit of Paige despite the time apart- to see the small hint of disappointment behind it. 

“I would’ve told her myself if she hadn’t,” Azzi says quietly and Paige turns back around to face her. 

“What?”

“I love you,” Azzi says and she swears no three words have ever sounded as right on her lips, as those three do, “I love you,” she repeats again and she can feel Paige’s hands shaking as they instinctively tighten their grip on her waist, “I love you so much Paige Madison Bueckers and I want everybody to know it. Stephie, our families, our friends, our teammates, the whole world. I love you and I never wanna hide that. I want everybody to know that you’re mine and I’m yours. Forever.”

A strangled sob escapes Paige’s mouth as she presses her forehead against Azzi’s, “I love you too. I love you, so, so, so much. I’ve loved you since the beginning and I’m gonna love you till the very end. Forever.”

Their lips meet in a searing kiss and it’s unclear if they’re both crying more or giggling more, as they hold each other as tightly as possible. And this isn’t their first kiss, far from it- far closer to being their millionth or so- but still it feels like a fresh new start, a brand new love story but with that same old special, all-consuming, forevermore love that has always connected them to each other. The one that had never gone away, no matter how long they’d been apart. 

“Ahem, ahem,” an exaggerated cough breaks them apart and the two of them turn their heads at the same time to see Stephie looking dramatically at them, her hands on her hips. 

  “So, Mama loves Miss Buecks and Miss Buecks loves Mama. What about Stephie?” she pouts, exaggeratedly stomping her foot. 

Paige and Azzi both laugh, removing themselves from each other just enough to crouch down and open their arms out for Stephie, beckoning for her to join their embrace. The little girl’s attempt at a sour expression is immediately replaced by a cheerful grin as she runs into their arms, tiny hands somehow managing to wrap around both of their necks. 

“You know we love you the most Stephie,” Paige whispers into the little girl’s hair, who lets out a content sigh as she burrows herself further into the two women’s arms. 

Azzi hums in agreement, closing her eyes as she leans her head against her daughter’s, feeling Paige’s fingers intertwine with her behind Stephie’s back. And then it’s quiet for a while, nothing but the sound of the three of them breathing and their hearts beating together in sync. Azzi feels at peace, her mind completely calm, no longer overthinking anything. 

Because now she finally has everything. 

Paige, Stephie, and the promise of a world the three of them can build together, it’s everything. 

[gasstationlady]

right person, right timing, right? | a charles leclerc social media au | pt. 1

pairing: charles leclerc x figureskater!reader (fc: jennie kim and some yuna kim)

after almost a decade, monaco's two-time olympic women's figure skating champion, y/n l/n, moves back home for her retirement.

notes: y/n's career is inspired by kim yuna's career! hopefully it’s not too confusing to read and follow 😭

disclaimer: typos. swearing. chatgpt french. i'm not the most educated in figure skating, so pls excuse any mistakes! photos aren't mine, nothing here is factual.

masterlist ⋆ next

nbcsports

92,932 likes

nbcsports Y/N L/N announces retirement after 2024 World Championships

The Queen of Figure Skating has taken her last bow.

NBCSports writer Kyle Smith tweets word that Y/N L/N, whose bid to become a fourth-consecutive World champion was narrowly denied today by the United States's Carolyn Rivers, has confirmed that she will retire at the age of 25.

The Monegasque superstar will end her stellar career with the 2018 and 2022 Olympic gold, three world championships, and the distinction of never finishing off the podium in her senior-level international career.

Read the rest of the article now on our website.

View all 508 comments

user no. fucking. way. please say sike rn

user God I don't blame her, figure skating is turning into math these days. She deserved that gold.

user ik monaco is depressed as hell rn LOL bc same

↳ user The way that's so accurate because imagine the #1 athlete representing your country is all of a sudden retiring. 😭😭 Monaco literally only has 2 Olympic medals EVER and they were both won by Y/N, if that doesn't say how significant she is to the country then idk.

↳ user i heard they even nicknamed her "Ice Queen Y/N" 😭😭

↳ user Yes, she is called "La Reine des Glaces" in Monaco!

user no hate to carolyn at all but she isn't rlly a complete skater. i'm extremely disappointed with the judging today

user wow i suddenly can't read

user Nooooo not my favorite skater ☹️

user i can't imagine watching a competition without y/n present :( such a major loss for the fs community, but i wish her the best in her retirement! 🥺🥺

user she just did one of the best performances i've ever seen, just to end up winning silver?? make it make sense fr

yourusername

liked by _kagavovskay_14, mlnmarta and 140,861 others

yourusername chez moi est là où est mon cœur, je t'aime monaco 🇲🇨 SEE TRANSLATION home is where my heart is, i love you monaco 🇲🇨

View all 1,816 comments

graciegold95 Beautiful 💞

↳ yourusername 💞💞

user are you quiting skating forever? :(

↳ yourusername i’ll be taking a break for a while but i will always skate, just not competitively! ❤️

user Nous regretterons de vous voir compétitionner, mais nous espérons que vous passerez une retraite incroyable, notre reine des glaces. SEE TRANSLATION We will miss watching you compete, but we hope you have an amazing retirement, our ice queen.

↳ yourusername Merci beaucoup ❤️ SEE TRANSLATION Thank you so much ❤️

isabeau.levito 🥹❤️❤️

mae_meite Je te souhaite tout le meilleur, jolie 💞 SEE TRANSLATION Wishing the best for you, pretty 💞

user so beautiful

user Bienvenue chez toi ! SEE TRANSLATION Welcome back home !

user i can’t be the only one wishing for charles and y/n to reunite (and get back together) now that she moved back to Monaco 😅

↳ user STOP BC LITERALLY ME TOOO 😭😭😭

↳ user omg i thought i was the only one who remembered they dated

y/nupdates

5,211 likes

y/nupdates Y/N attending a fundraising event in Paris! This is her first appearance since announcing her retirement three weeks ago 🥹

View all 55 comments

user I already miss seeing her on the ice 🥲

user omgg her wearing chanel is everything

user aww she looks so happy!!

user How did charles fumble her

↳ user i'm pretty sure that it was just the wrong time for them :(

↳ user Ik that they broke up bc she moved to Canada for skating but why couldn't they just do long distance 😩😩

user y/n will forever be my celebrity crush 😍😍

leclerc16

2,332 likes

leclerc16 Charles in Paris with fans today!

View all 30 comments

user seeing everyone surrounding him overwhelms me and i’m not even there 😩

user am i delusional for thinking he’ll somehow see y/n in Paris 😭😭

↳ user I mean they also both have been in Monaco the past two months and so far no interactions between them 😐

↳ user well no interactions that we know of 😁🤔

user charles looks so bf here

yourusername

liked by chanelofficial, lorenzotl, arthur_leclerc and 160,323 others

yourusername merci @/chanelofficial de m'avoir invitée 💞 SEE TRANSLATION thank you for inviting me 💞

View all 433 comments

chanelofficial 💞💞

user face card never declines

user so pretty 😍😍

user omg not arthur AND lorenzo liking this pic?? 👀

↳ user the logical side of me thinks it’s normal bc they all grew up together but at the same time it’s kind of sus since it’s usually just Arthur liking and not both🤔

↳ user 😭😭😭

user wait i’m confused why did she retire at such a young age?

↳ user It’s actually quite common for competitive figure skaters to retire “early.” Y/N hasn’t stated an official reason but I’m assuming the physical and mental exhaustion just got to her, especially because the sport has been favoring difficulty over artistry lately 🤷‍♀️

mlnmarta

liked by yourusername, charles_leclerc and 33,522 others

mlnmarta Les aventures avec sa tante Y/N sont ses préférées ❤️ SEE TRANSLATION Adventures with her Aunt Y/N are her favorite ❤️

View all 193 comments

yourusername le temps avec Chiara est mon préféré 🥰 SEE TRANSLATION Time with Chiara is my favorite 🥰

user the cutest duo 🥹

user Why is this y/n girl suddenly everywhere

↳ user umm y/n and marta are childhood friends lmao they’ve always posted each other! i think the internet has just amplified everything recently

user so does y/n have no job now lmfao

↳ user I'm like 98% sure she's gonna end up being a figure skating coach or an influencer or both

↳ user guys she's literally still working with her sponsors and i don't think they're dropping her any time soon

↳ user Chilllll she deadass just retired

user NO WAY CHARLES LIKED

yourusername

liked by charles_leclerc, lorenzotl and 597,390 others

yourusername Je voulais juste remercier tous ceux qui sont venus me soutenir lors de ma dernière présentation à Monaco. Je suis infiniment reconnaissante. Ce n'est pas la fin, mais plutôt le début d'un nouveau chapitre. ❤️

I just wanted to thank everyone who came to support me at my final showcase in Monaco. I’m endlessly grateful. This is not the end, instead it’s the start of a new chapter. ❤️

View all 2,104 comments

yourbestie À couper le souffle. Je t'aime ❤️ SEE TRANSLATION Breathtaking. I love you ❤️

user je n'ai pas pu m'empêcher de pleurer en regardant 😭😭 SEE TRANSLATION i couldn’t help the tears from falling while watching 😭😭

user you’re amazing 🫶🏼

chanelofficial 💞💞

adidas A true queen 👑

user WAITTTTT CHARLES LIKED

↳ user It’s aggravating to see Charles constantly being mentioned in Y/N’s comments. Other than that, this is a reach. I think everyone is forgetting that Y/N is highly respected in Monaco so it’s not unusual for Charles to like her photos. You can even check; all of Charles friends and other well known individuals from Monaco are also in her likes.

↳ user lmfaoooo it’s truly not that deep girl, it’s okay to smile

user her adding in her own translation is so real of her 😭

user There will never be another skater as graceful and talented as you 🥺🥺

f1gossip

12,388 likes

f1gossip Charles Leclerc seen with ex-girlfriend Camille Dubois driving around Monaco. Many fans were convinced he was back with a different ex, Y/N L/N, after Charles and his family were spotted at Y/N’s retirement showcase last week. Always Mr. Indecisive 👀👀

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user bruh 😐

user This is crazy wtf i’d be pissed if i were y/n

user CAMILLE AND NOT Y/N BYEE i’m sliding down the wall punching the air sobbing bc what the hell

user i’m going insane contemplating the possibility that y/n and charles were always just friends and never had any intentions to get back together

user not what i wanted to see first thing in the morning 👎

user guys was it all in our heads

[4nyangnyangz]

Derrière le Masque 🪷

synopsis: while looking around at an art exhibit, you encounter a masked stranger whose enigmatic presence leaves you captivated. when fate brings you together again, you begin to uncover the secrets behind his mask. as his hidden world unfolds, so does an unexpected connection—one that could either bring you closer or reveal truths that change everything.

pairings: painter!huening kai x fem reader

tags: strangers to lovers(?), fluff, a bit of angst IF YOU SQUINT, slightly suggestive towards the end, implications of the reader being older than Kai(he calls her noona once), huening siblings are mentioned!

wordcount: 7k (there might be typos/grammatical errors, this isn't proofread!!)

a/n: made this while I was listening to wave to earth and having a hyuka brainrot,,, got the idea of painter hyuka after looking through the minisode 3 romantic ver. concept photos, HE IS JUST SO BEAUTIFUL GOOD LORD. PS. the title translates to "behind the mask" in english!! (I CAN'T SPEAK FRENCH SO THE TITLE COULD BE INACCURATE!)

fic below the cut!

-------------------------

You looked around, trying to settle in to the unfamiliar environment around you. A gentle hum of conversations mixed with the echoes of soft footsteps on polished floors fills the air of the museum. You wander through the galleries while passing by groups of people observing each artwork, each person lost in their own interpretation, sharing knowing smiles or animated discussions.

“Y/N! Over here!”, an excited voice calls out to you from a distance. You turned to the direction of where the voice came from and you were greeted by a familiar face which made you sigh in relief.

You carefully passed through the small crowds as you walked towards your friend, Winter, who was one of the artists showcasing their works in the art exhibit that took place in the museum. You accepted her invite as a way of showing your support to her, since she has been one of your closest friends since high school.

“I'm so glad you're here!”, Winter exclaims and immediately pulls you in for a hug. You hug her back with a smile on your face, feeling proud of your friend's achievements.

“I thought you wouldn't come, since you didn't text me or anything.”, she mutters while she rests her chin on your shoulder,embracing you tightly.

“Don't be silly, of course I'd come! I just wanted to surprise you.”, you chuckle, hugging her tighter.

The both of you pull away from the hug after a few minutes and immediately started the conversation like you had just spoken yesterday, catching up on what you missed. It's been months since you last saw each other and you had only communicated with her over the phone, so it made you emotional to see your friend again like this.

Your conversation with her didn't last long however, as she needed to attend to the guests exploring the exhibit, but the both of you promised to meet up again soon when you had the time.

After bidding farewell to your friend, you had no other plans in mind. Aside from coming there to support her, you didn't really know what else to do. You weren't exactly an expert when it comes to art, but you certainly wanted to keep looking around the exhibit more.

“I should probably just look around while I'm here...”' you muttered while looking down to check the time on your phone. You slowly put your phone back in your purse and proceed to walk down the hallway, admiring the various paintings that were being displayed as you passed by.

Something catches your eye—a row of paintings by the same artist, lined up in perfect harmony. Each piece was unique, yet there was a thread of continuity that tied them together. You felt drawn in, as if the paintings were whispering their stories directly to you. You were captivated by the way each painting felt like a window into the artist's soul.

Clusters of people surrounded you and you were in awe from a wide range of people that had the same thought, admiring the row of paintings that were being displayed. Gasps of admiration rippled through the audience, punctuated by murmurs of awe and appreciation. A group of art enthusiasts were gathered beside you, discussing their thoughts as they observed the paintings thoroughly.

“It seems the artist chose to remain anonymous this year, too.”

“If only we knew who were behind these beautiful paintings, we would love to give credit where it's due.”

“It’s a shame we can’t know who created this. I want to understand the person behind these emotions.”

As the discussions swirled, an art critic stepped forward, passionately defending the artist’s choice.

“Art can exist without the artist's narrative dictating its value. This is a statement about the work itself, challenging us to find meaning within the canvas rather than through a biography.”

The crowd shifted between admiration and frustration, some nodding in agreement, while others remained resolute in their disappointment. The air was thick with the opposing reactions—curiosity, appreciation, and a longing for connection. You were intrigued, but also starting to get overwhelmed by the contrasting emotions from the crowd.

The vibrant colors of the artworks blurred into the background as you focused on finding a way out of the crowd. You walked away in a hurry, squeezing through the groups of people surrounding the area.

You suddenly bumped into someone—an unexpected encounter that halted your hurried steps.

You mutter a small apology as you look up to face the hooded figure standing in front of you. A mask covered the lower half of his face, and he had wavy blonde hair resting on top of his forehead that was slightly covering his eyes. You were quick to notice how he had defined features that were evident despite his face being covered. The fabric of his hood framed his face, adding an enigmatic quality that made it hard to look away.

You took a step back as you felt your heart quickening, catching yourself studying him. As you shifted to move past him, your eyes locked for a fleeting moment. You noticed how his eyes looked somewhat empty, yet you felt that his gaze was soft, concealed by the lack of emotion displayed in his eyes. In that instant, you felt an electric connection, a shared understanding of the allure of concealment. He was a figure shrouded in mystery, yet somehow, you sensed a depth beneath the surface—a story waiting to be told.

You apologized once more and immediately excuse yourself, walking away as you placed your right hand on your chest. You let out a sigh of relief as you stepped out of the museum, while the encounter continues to linger in your mind like an unfinished painting, leaving you both intrigued and curious about the identity behind the mask.

--------------

The air was filled with the aroma of freshly brewed coffee as you stood behind the counter of the bustling coffee shop. The vibrant glow from the street lights outside streamed through the large windows, casting warm patches of light on the polished wooden surfaces.

It was Friday, almost a week after you went to the art exhibit that your friend invited you to. The café was typically crowded on weekends, but today it was quieter and less crowded than usual. You glanced around, catching a glimpse of the customers that were seated. A student sat in the corner with their earbuds in, furiously typing away on her laptop with a half-finished latte cooling beside her. On the table across her was a couple huddled over a shared pastry, laughing softly as they shared stories, their eyes sparkling with affection. You smiled to yourself, enjoying your daily routine of observing the people that would come to the café.

You glanced towards the entrance of the café to see a figure approaching, their presence strikingly different from the usual crowd. They wore a dark cap pulled low over their eyes and a mask that obscured the lower half of their face, giving them an air of mystery.

Despite the disguise, something about them felt familiar, like a fleeting memory hovering just out of reach. You greeted them with a warm smile as they glanced through the menu that was being displayed on the screen behind you. They turn their attention to you after a few seconds, seemingly after deciding what to order.

“Hey,” they said, their voice slightly muffled but still warm. “I'd like a medium strawberry acai lemonade to go, please.”

“Sure thing,” you replied, trying to mask your curiosity. As you prepared their drink, you couldn’t help but study the details—how the cap cast shadows on their features and the way their eyes flickered with intrigue. It felt like they were hiding something, but you couldn’t tell if it was intentional or just part of their aura. The mysterious stranger meets your eyes, as if they noticed that you were taking quick yet not so subtle glances at them while you were preparing their drink. You immediately look away and attempt to focus at the task at hand, feeling heat rush up to your cheeks.

As you continued to prepare their drink, thoughts still racing from the recognition, you hear a familiar voice again, tinged with curiosity.

“Sorry to bother, but are you free after this?”

You glance up at them, surprised but intrigued. The stranger stood there, slightly leaning against the counter while holding their phone, their cap slightly askew, revealing a few strands of their blonde hair. The mask still obscured part of their face, but their eyes sparkled with interest. After exchanging eye contact and taking a better look at them, your eyes widened and you felt your heart skip a beat as the recognition washed over you. The same eyes you had seen at the art exhibit sparkled beneath the brim of the cap, and in that moment, everything clicked into place.

The memory flooded back, the familiar intensity of their gaze helping you come into the realization: it was the mysterious person you had bumped into amidst the paintings, the one whose presence had captivated you. It felt surreal to see them here, hidden behind a mask and cap, yet unmistakably the same.

“Y-yeah, I think so,” you replied, attempting to hide what you were feeling while trying to gauge the sincerity of the invitation. “Why do you ask?”

The stranger puts his hand in the pocket of his pants, rummaging as if he was trying to find something.

“I don't know if you can remember, but you dropped this at the exhibit last Saturday. I wasn’t sure how to get it back to you since I didn’t have your contact information, so I’m really glad to see you again here.” the stranger mutters as he opens his hand to reveal a familiar item that takes you by surprise.

A small customized keyring of Glaceon, your favorite Pokémon character rests on his hand. You had been looking for it ever since that day, and you eventually gave up after realizing that you probably dropped it somewhere along the way, so you decided to just get a new one. You never expected that the person you bumped into that day would be the one to pick it up and return it to you.

“Oh gosh, I thought I lost them forever! I was literally about to just get a new one pre-made because I couldn't find them anywhere.”, you exclaim, a mix of relief and happiness evident in your face.

“I figured this would be important to you so I tried looking everywhere, I'm just glad I finally found you.” the stranger fiddles with the keyring in his hand, “Glaceon, huh... that's cute.”

“Wait, you play Pokémon too?”, your eyes lit up after realizing that they just recognized the character.

You hear a muffled chuckle come from the stranger before responding,

“Kind of. Just when I have free time.”

You were about to respond back and start gushing about one of your favorite games when you hear your co-worker clear her throat, interrupting your conversation.

“Ahem, y/n.”, the barista next to you, a tattooed woman with vibrant hair calls out to you, reminding you not to get too carried away with your conversation. You were still working, after all.

Your lips form into a small 'o' as the realization hits you and gets you flustered. You quickly pick up the Strawberry Acai Lemonade that you prepared and hand it over to the customer standing in front of you.

“I'll hold on to Glaceon for now. What time do you get off?”, the stranger asks as he take the drink from you and stuffed the keyring back in his pocket.

“My shift ends at 7, so...”, you paused and looked at the watch strapped to your wrist before continuing, “That's 2 hours from now.”

“Great, I'll be waiting for you at the park nearby. See you later then.”, the stranger says and you nod, accepting their invitation. He waves at you one last time before heading out of the café. You can’t help but smile after the interaction, you weren't expecting that you'd get your keyring back like this.

Your coworker leans in with a teasing glint in their eye. “I've seen people ask for your number but I haven't seen anyone get straight to the point and just ask you out like that before. Should I be worried?”

“He didn't 'ask me out', he just wanted to return the keyring that I lost.”, you reply as you sighed, fighting a grin.

“If you say so, but I wouldn't be surprised if he started coming here often.” they say, chuckling.

You rolled your eyes at them and the both of you laugh together.

-----------------

The fluorescent lights of the café buzz overhead as you finish up your last task, a mix of excitement and relief washing over you. You grab your jacket, toss it on, and make your way out of the building, the cool evening air greeting you like an old friend.

The city is alive with the sounds of laughter and chatter as you make your way to the park. You look around to see families picnicking, couples walking hand in hand, and kids running around with joy. You turn towards the sprawling oak tree and you started to get nervous after spotting a familiar figure kneeling on the sidewalk.

You felt your heart skip a beat, not just from their presence, but from the sight of them gently cradling a small bowl of cat food. A scruffy stray cat, fur matted and eyes wide with curiosity, approached him in a cautious manner. Curiously, you lean against a nearby lamppost, watching as they softly cooed to the cat, coaxing it closer with soothing words. Their kindness drew you in, and you felt warm after seeing them care for the stray cat.

After a few seconds of hesitating, the cat finally took a tentative step forward and began nibbling at the food. You slowly approach the both of them, taking careful steps to not startle the cat.

“Hey,” you say in a whisper, kneeling beside him and he turns to you after noticing your presence.

“Sorry if I kept you waiting.”

He shrugs before responding.“Not at all, I haven't been waiting long. I just came across this little one and I had a pack of treats with me, so...”

You smiled at him before turning your direction back to the cat and he does the same. The both of you shared a glance, and you felt the connection deepen. It was as if the world around the both of you faded, leaving just the three of you in that moment—two people and a stray cat enjoying a simple act of kindness.

After a few minutes, the cat finished its meal and scurried away, leaving you both with lingering smiles and a sense of shared purpose. The both of you stood up, brushing your knees off. He grabs the Glaceon keyring out from his pocket and hands it over to you.

“Thank you so much, I got so upset when I couldn't find them anywhere. This just made my whole week,” you smile as you gently take the keyring from his hand. The slight touch of your skin makes your heart flutter. “Do you want to stop by somewhere? Let me get you something to snack on, at least.”

“Sure, I don't mind, but it's fine. You don't have to get me anything, really,” he replies.

“No, I insist. I'm starving, so let me get something for you too.” You say as you step forward to lead the way, determined not to give him a chance to decline.

You hear a muffled chuckle come from under his mask as he nods, muttering a small, “Okay.”

As you walk down the street, the bright lights of a nearby convenience store come into view. It’s small and cozy, the kind of place that feels like a treasure trove of late-night snacks.

“Do you have any favorites?” you ask as you push the door open, the familiar jingling of the bell overhead announcing your arrival.

He scans the aisles with crossed arms, a slight frown creasing his brow. “I usually go for pizza, but ice cream would be nice at this hour too…”

You chuckle, trying to ease the tension hanging between you. “That’s okay, just grab what you feel like eating. It’s on me.” His hesitation is palpable, a moment of uncertainty flickering in his eyes before you offer a reassuring smile.

As you both wander the aisles, the air is filled with the scent of snacks and the soft hum of the store. You steal a glance at him—his mask covers part of his face, but his eyes seem contemplative, guarded. He finally picks up a pint of mint chocolate ice cream from the freezer and turns to you, catching you observing him.

“Mint chocolate, huh?” you tease lightly, trying to break the ice. He raises an eyebrow, and you could almost see the confused expression he's making behind the mask.

“Yeah, it’s my favorite flavor,” he replies with a hint of pride.

You can’t help but grimace slightly. “Really? I’m not a fan. The mint just doesn’t sit right with me.”

His eyes widen a little, clearly surprised. “Seriously? What’s wrong with mint? It’s refreshing!”

You laugh, shaking your head. “Refreshing, sure, but it feels like I’m eating toothpaste. I prefer something richer, like chocolate fudge or cookies and cream.”

He leans forward, intrigued. “So you’re a chocolate purist? I can respect that.”

You both chuckle before you continue browsing, the shared laughter and small conversations feel just out of reach, heightening the mystery of each other. Still, as he tosses a pint of mint chocolate ice cream into his basket, there’s a flicker of connection—a shared moment in the late-night glow of the store, where the outside world fades away, leaving just the two of you, uncertain but curious.

After making your selections, you step outside the convenience store, the night air cool against your skin. You find a small table nearby, the kind that’s seen better days but still feels welcoming under the glow of the streetlights.

“Mind if we sit here?” you ask, gesturing to the table. He nods, a hint of relief in his posture as he takes a seat across from you.

You unwrap your snacks, the sounds of crinkling wrappers filling the silence. He carefully sets his cup of mint chocolate ice cream down, glancing around with a hint of uncertainty, as if he was making sure there wasn't anyone around to see him. You look around, and turn to face him once you saw that the coast was clear and there wasn't anyone else around.

“You know, it’s going to be a bit tricky to eat that with the mask on,” you point out playfully, leaning back in your chair.

He looks at you with hesitant eyes, his fingers brushing against the fabric of the mask. “Yeah, but...”

“You could just take it off for a minute,” you say, your voice light but encouraging. “Nobody's around, and besides, I promise I won’t judge if that's what you’re worried about.” You offer him a smile, trying to make it as reassuring as possible.

He hesitates, clearly wrestling with something. Then he sighs, shoulders relaxing a little.“Alright, I guess you have a point.”

He pauses, studying you for a moment, as if deciding whether to trust you with whatever he’s about to reveal. The tension lingers in the air—just a heartbeat of silence—before it disappears as he slowly pulls the mask down, revealing his face.

You freeze, completely caught off guard.

It’s like everything else in the world fades away for a second as you take in his features. His face is almost striking yet gentle at the same time, in a way that feels almost effortless. Sharp jawline. High cheekbones. The kind of face you’d expect to see on the cover of a magazine, but somehow more real in person. His eyes are warm and dream-like but a little guarded, there’s something about them that feels... genuine. A trace of a smile plays at the corners of his lips, and for a second, you wonder if you’ve been staring too long.

“Sorry for the late introduction," he says, his voice a bit hesitant. "I wasn’t sure how to go about it earlier.”

He pauses for a moment, studying your reaction, before continuing, “I’m... Kai—”

“Huening Kai. From the Huening family, right?” The words slip out before you can stop them. You blink a couple of times, mentally scrambling to catch up.

He nods slowly, holding your gaze with a slight intensity. There's a brief flicker of something unreadable in his eyes before he adds, “Yeah... I’m Huening Kai. But you can just call me Kai, really. You probably know me because of my sisters.” His voice drops slightly, almost apologetically, as he looks away, an awkwardness settling in.

Your mind races as the pieces fall into place. His sisters. The models. The towering figures in the fashion world whose faces grace billboards and magazines everywhere. You've seen them countless times, admired their poise and style from a distance. But sitting across from you now is the brother—the one who’s always kept himself out of the limelight, the middle child who stays hidden behind a veil of mystery. The one you’ve never seen before.

“Wait a second,” you murmur, still trying to wrap your head around it. “You're... really him? I didn’t realize I was sitting across from someone so... famous.”

He lets out a small chuckle, but there's no warmth behind it. “Well, I’m not exactly famous. Not in the same way they are,” he adds, his tone a little defensive, a little tired.

You raise an eyebrow, sensing something deeper. “What do you mean? Your sisters are huge. You're part of that family. How are you not as well-known?”

He shifts uncomfortably, glancing down at his ice cream cup as though it holds some kind of answer.

“That’s exactly why I don’t like being in the spotlight. I...didn’t want to follow the path they set for me.” His fingers absently trace the rim of the cup.

“My family’s been in the public eye for ages. My sisters, they're everywhere—billboards, magazines, the runway. But I... I never really wanted to be part of all that.”

You lean in a little, intrigued by the rawness in his voice. “So, you... chose a different path?”

He nods, his eyes briefly flickering with something hard to pinpoint—frustration, maybe, or regret.

“Yeah. My family’s always had these big plans for me—training, appearances, all that stuff they thought was best for me. But it wasn’t for me. So I stayed out of the spotlight. I didn’t want that life. I wanted something else—something more... personal, I guess.”

There's a quiet sincerity in his words, a weight that hangs in the air between you. It's a side of him that doesn’t quite match the image you'd imagined, and it makes you want to know more, however you didn't want to dwell on the topic too much.

You realize you're treading dangerously close to territory that feels too personal for a first meeting, especially with someone like him. The last thing you want is to make him uncomfortable, so you quickly clear your throat and shift gears.

“Well, I guess it's only fair I introduce myself too,” you start, trying to keep the mood light, “I'm y/n, you probably know this already, but I work as a barista on the café just down the street, where you saw me. I like to play games during my free time, but you might've already guessed that after seeing the Glaceon keyring.” you say with a chuckle and Kai laughs, you notice the way his shoulders relax a little.

“So, what brought you to the art exhibit last week?” he asks, taking a small scoop of ice cream.

You raise your eyebrows. “Oh, I got invited by a friend. She was one of the artists there. I haven’t seen her in a few months and I was free, so I figured I’d drop by to support her.” You smile, taking out a chocolate chip cookie from the wrapper and taking a bite. “How about you?”

Kai’s eyes flicker with a brief change, like a shadow crossing his expression. You almost miss it—he’s quick to cover it up—but you see the subtle shift. He clears his throat and takes another bite of ice cream, suddenly looking just a little bit more uncomfortable.

“Oh, I just… I went for the atmosphere, I guess,” he says a little too casually. “It seemed like a nice event. I, uh… I like paintings and I go to art galleries sometimes. So I thought I’d check it out.”

You nod, not thinking much of it.

“Yeah, it was pretty cool. Some of the pieces really blew me away, though. There was this one collection—landscapes, mostly—I can't find a way to describe them since I'm not really an artistic person. I think I spent most of my time just standing there, taking them in. They were so vivid. It's a shame the artist chose to hide their identity, though.”

Kai’s hand stiffens for a split second. His eyes flicker to you, then quickly away, his face flushing just a bit, and he suddenly becomes very interested in his ice cream cup.

“Oh… really? That's a bummer..” he says, his voice just a bit too quiet. “You, uh… you liked those pieces?” His tone is a little uncertain, like he’s trying not to let on too much.

“Yeah, it’s a real shame, honestly,” you say, taking another bite of your chocolate chip cookie, enjoying the taste as you talk. “I mean, the art was just so powerful. You could tell there was so much emotion behind it. Especially with the landscapes—like the mountains at sunset? There was this depth to them that was almost… haunting. I wanted to know more, to understand what the artist was feeling when they created it, you know?”

“Yeah, I get that,” he mutters, his voice softer now. He glances at you briefly before quickly looking away. “It’s always interesting to try and figure out what the artist was thinking, especially when they’re not around to explain it.”

Kai’s gaze drops to his cup, his fingers tapping lightly against the edge. There’s a strange unease in his posture now, like he’s trying to decide if he should say something or not. The words hang in the air, unspoken, before he finally clears his throat.

“Sometimes, though, it’s better to leave things open to interpretation. People see art differently, right?”

“I guess that’s true, I think the best artists aren’t afraid to share their vision. It’s not about just putting a painting out there—it’s about sharing a piece of yourself.” you say thoughtfully, “But I think if the art is good enough, it can speak louder than the artist ever could. Sometimes it’s better to let the art stand on its own.” You smile at him, clearly passionate about the subject.

Kai seems to relax just a fraction, though there’s still a subtle tension around him. He forces a small smile, but there’s something in his eyes—a mix of guilt, embarrassment, and something deeper—that you can’t quite place.

“Yeah… I guess you’re right.” He glances at you, his face a little flushed. “I mean, it’s just art, right? Not everything needs a big explanation.”

You nod in agreement, though you still can’t shake the feeling that there’s more to the story.

-------------------

It's Saturday, and a week has passed since your unexpected encounter with Kai. In that short span of time, so much has happened, yet the days seem to have gotten a little easier, a little brighter. The usual hustle and bustle of working at the café remains, but there's a noticeable lightness to your routine now.

After exchanging numbers, you and Kai started talking more—texting, calling, and meeting up when you could. Slowly, you both opened up, and you began to get to know each other in ways you hadn't anticipated. Kai turned out to be full of surprises. You discovered he was of mixed ethnicity: his mother is Korean, and his father is German-American. That blend of cultures explains his striking features, with sharp eyes and a unique, almost ethereal look.

He also revealed something that made you smile: he was two years younger than you. A fun fact, but it only added to the growing sense of camaraderie between you two. And, to your delight, Kai had a quirky side—you learned that he has a collection of plushies and stuffed animals, something you never would have guessed from his usual cool, laid-back demeanor.

But the best part? The two of you seemed to share so many interests and hobbies. From the same taste in music to mutual love for quirky movies and favorite games, it felt like the more you discovered, the more you had in common. And somehow, as the days went by, it was as if you’d known each other far longer than just a week.

It wasn’t an exaggeration to say that you’d originally just wanted to befriend Kai. After all, he was kind enough to seek you out just to return your keyring, a small gesture that had caught you off guard. But as you spent more time with him, getting to know him better, you couldn’t help but notice that little flutter in your chest whenever you saw him, heard him laugh, or felt the quiet spark between you two. Before you knew it, a small crush had started to form—a soft, hesitant thing that grew each time you connected.

Well, that was the case… until he asked you to hang out with him on the weekend. You remember the moment clearly, as if it had just happened yesterday.

It was a Wednesday night, and you were walking side by side with Kai after your shift. The streets were quieter than usual, the park just a few blocks away offering a peaceful backdrop to the end of a long day. You were lost in conversation, laughing about something silly when suddenly, he said something that made you stop in your tracks.

Kai took a few more steps ahead before noticing you weren’t following. He turned back, his brows raised in quiet curiosity.

“Wait, what?” you asked, not quite trusting your ears. You had heard him correctly, but you needed to be sure your mind wasn’t playing tricks on you. You looked up at him, waiting for some sort of clarification.

Kai’s lips curled into a soft, amused smile, and he let out a low chuckle. “I said, do you want to come over to my place this weekend? We can play Genshin, Pokémon, watch anime, or… whatever you feel like doing. I just want to hang out with you.”

Your heart skipped a beat, and before you could filter your words, they spilled out excitedly. “Sure! I'd love to—” You froze mid-sentence, realizing how quickly you’d agreed. You tried to recover, clearing your throat and regaining some semblance of composure. “I mean… I’m off that day, and I don’t really have anything better to do, so... yeah, sure. Why not?” You laughed awkwardly, feeling the heat rise to your cheeks. You were hoping that he wouldn't notice that state you were in.

Kai smiled at your response, his eyes twinkling with warmth. “Cool, I’ll send you the address when I get home then,” he said casually, but the soft smile he gave you made your heart race again.

Now here you are, standing nervously in front of his apartment door. Your fingers anxiously toy with the hem of your shirt, the weight of indecision hanging over you. Should you ring the doorbell now, or wait just a little longer? You pull your phone from your pocket once again, unlocking it to check your reflection in the camera, making sure your makeup is still on point.

You catch yourself wondering if you’ve overdone it, but can’t help the doubt creeping in. It is your first time meeting up with him on the weekend, so why settle for the usual work clothes when you can dress up a little? So that's exactly what you did. You chose to go for a simple, casual yet cute vibe for your outfit, a reflection of your personality. Still, the thought of being alone with him in his space makes your stomach flutter with nerves.

After a long, drawn-out moment of hesitation, you take a deep breath to steady yourself, then press the doorbell. Your heart pounds as you wait, counting the seconds, the anticipation building with every beat. Finally, the door clicks open.

You look up and find Kai standing in the doorway. He’s dressed casually, wearing a loose gray hoodie and black sweatpants. It’s nothing extravagant, but the moment your eyes meet, a rush of warmth floods your cheeks. You’ve seen him dressed in something similar before, but there’s something about seeing him in these comfortable, almost cozy clothes that sends your thoughts spinning.

Lately, you've noticed that it’s been harder to keep those stray thoughts at bay. You can’t help but think about him at the oddest moments. You catch yourself re-reading his texts when work gets stressful, and somehow, it always makes you smile. It’s gotten to the point where your co-worker has noticed you spacing out, daydreaming in the middle of a shift. Your little “crush” on him has turned into something more… something that you can’t quite shake off.

“Hey, Y/N! Sorry if I kept you waiting,” Kai says, running a hand through his hair as he gestures for you to come inside.

“Hey, Kai. Not at all, don’t worry!” You force a smile, trying to steady your racing heart, and step inside.

Your eyes quickly scan the unfamiliar space as he shuts the door behind you. You flinch slightly at the sound, the soft click of the door locking behind you amplifying the tension in the air.

As you step inside, you immediately notice how spacious the apartment feels. The high ceilings and open layout give it a sense of freedom, like the space was designed to breathe. Natural light pours in through large windows, casting soft beams that highlight the simple yet creative details of the room.

It’s clear that this place reflects Kai in every corner. The furniture is minimalistic, but it’s carefully chosen, with a mix of modern lines and vintage pieces that feel both comfortable and intentional.

It’s really happening. You’re alone with him now... in his house. But it’s just to hang out. Nothing weird about it. Just play some games, maybe have a laugh... You try to convince yourself, but the fluttering in your stomach refuses to settle.

Kai turns to you with a quick glance, then smiles softly. “Follow me. I have something to show you.”

You nod, feeling your heart pick up its pace, and follow him as he leads you down a short hallway. After a few steps, he stops in front of a closed door, his hand hovering over the doorknob. You pause too, standing beside him, your gaze lingering on his hand as he slowly, almost cautiously, wraps his fingers around the handle.

“I...”, he looks at you for just a second, his eyes flickering with something unreadable before he looks away, his hesitation hanging heavy in the air.

The nervousness in your own chest grows with his. What’s going on? You think, worry creeping in as you watch him falter.

“What's wrong?” you ask, your voice soft, but the concern evident in the way you step closer to him.

The earlier tension shifts, replaced by a different kind of unease. It’s not about you anymore—it’s about him. You don’t want him to feel uncomfortable, especially if something is making him hesitate this much.

You gently reach out, placing your hand on his free one. A small, comforting smile pulls at your lips as you give his hand a reassuring squeeze. His fingers loosen slightly on the doorknob, but he doesn't pull away from your touch.

Kai looks at you, his eyes softening, and for the first time since you arrived, he seems to exhale, a quiet calm settling over him. The tension in his shoulders eases, and you can almost see him relax, if only just a little.

“You're probably going to hate me for this, but I didn't want to keep any secrets from you.” he says, a light laugh escaping him, though there’s an edge of uncertainty in it. You shake your head, not needing to hear more.

Your heart races. It dawns on you then: whatever lies behind that door, he’s kept it hidden. And now, he trusts you enough to share it. There’s a mixture of excitement and anticipation building in your chest, but also a growing sense of wonder.

What could it be? What secret does he keep in that room? You think to yourself.

Kai’s hand tightens around yours for a brief moment before he takes a deep breath and slowly pushes the door open, revealing the unknown inside.

The door creaks open, and you step into the room, immediately struck by the soft, golden light pouring in through the large window at the far wall. The sunlight spills across the space, bathing everything in a warm, almost dreamlike glow. It feels intimate, personal—like you’ve stepped into something that is deeply, intrinsically Kai.

You take a few steps further in, your gaze drawn to the walls. The paintings are everywhere—some framed and hung meticulously, others leaning casually against the walls as if still waiting for their final placement. The works range from precise and vivid to rough and abstract, but they all share a raw energy, a depth of emotion that’s impossible to ignore.

Some of the paintings are finished—brilliantly detailed and vibrant with emotion. Others are in progress, the brushstrokes thick and loose, as though caught mid-thought. And the way the light catches on the unfinished works, highlighting the vivid streaks of color, you get the feeling that each piece was crafted here in this very room, in that same soft, intimate light. The unfinished ones don’t feel incomplete—they feel alive, as if the artist is still in the process of giving birth to something profound.

Your heart beats a little faster as your eyes take in the sight. The realization hits you like a wave.

These paintings—they’re the ones you saw at the exhibit. The ones that had captivated you, left you wondering about the mysterious anonymous artist behind them. You remember standing in that gallery, looking at the work, feeling a strange, magnetic pull to it, wondering about the artist—who they were, what their story was, why they had chosen to remain faceless, unknown.

And now you know. The artist—the one who had everyone buzzing, everyone desperate to know their identity—is Kai.

The pieces on the walls now are familiar, but they’re so much more than you expected. You had been amazed by them at the gallery, but standing here in the room where they were created, the connection to each brushstroke, each layer of paint, feels much deeper. This is where it all started. This is where Kai has poured himself into every canvas, shaping emotions and stories in silence. And now, it feels like the weight of that silence is finally being lifted.

You turn to Kai, and for a brief moment, you can’t speak. The air between you is thick with the unspoken truth.

He’s watching you, his posture tense, but his eyes—the vulnerability in them is unmistakable. His gaze flickers over to the paintings, then quickly shifts back to you, as if he’s bracing himself for your reaction.

“I never thought I’d show anyone this side of me,” Kai says quietly, his voice almost lost in the stillness of the room. “But the world... they wanted to know who I was. The anonymous artist, the one behind these paintings... I didn’t want to reveal it. Not like this.”

Your breath catches, and you feel a tightness in your chest. The mystery, the anonymity—it all makes sense now. Everyone had been so desperate to uncover the artist behind the work, but Kai wasn’t ready to give that part of himself away. Not until now.

You move closer, your hand instinctively reaching out for his, a silent gesture of comfort, of connection.

“But you’re ready now,” you say softly, the weight of his words sinking in. “You’ve already shared your work with the world, but this... this is something deeper, isn’t it?”

Kai nods, his eyes softening as he meets your gaze. There’s something almost relieved in his expression, like the burden of secrecy is finally lifting.

“I wasn’t ready to face what it would mean to have everyone know. But I think...” His voice falters for a moment, as if unsure of what he’s saying, but then he exhales deeply, as if coming to terms with it. “I think I’m ready for you to see it. For you to know.”

Your heart races as you take in his words. The paintings—the ones that had left you breathless, the ones that had sparked so many questions—are his. This whole time, you had admired them from afar, but now you see the artist behind them. You see him.

“They’re incredible, Kai,” you say, your voice soft, but full of awe. “The world deserves to know you did this. They deserve to see the person behind these works.”

He smiles, a slow, hesitant curve of his lips, and for the first time, you see the weight of the secret lifting from him. “Maybe,” he murmurs. “Maybe I’ll let them know. Maybe I’m ready.”

The room feels smaller now, not in a confining way, but in a way that draws you closer to him. This moment, this revelation, it’s like the light in the room has shifted, casting everything in a new, softer glow.

The paintings aren’t just paintings anymore—they’re pieces of Kai, of his journey, and they’re now part of something shared between the two of you.

You stand there, overwhelmed by the beauty of the room, the paintings, and the connection between them and Kai. It all feels so personal, so intimate. The realization hits you like a wave: Kai, the anonymous artist behind the work that captivated you, is standing right beside you.

Before you can stop yourself, your tears start to fall, unbidden and unexpected. You quickly wipe at your eyes, laughing nervously. You’re not sad—far from it—but overwhelmed, moved by the beauty of it all, and by the knowledge that Kai, the man you’re standing next to, is the one who created these masterpieces.

As silly as it may seem, it felt like fate had woven your paths together. From the moment his paintings first captivated you at the art exhibit to the chance encounter with him later that same day when you dropped your keyring, everything seemed to lead to this. Then there was that moment at the café when he finally returned it to you after searching for you for so long. And now, discovering that it was Kai behind those paintings all along, you’re overwhelmed with emotion. His presence beside you feels warmer than ever, like everything finally makes sense.

You don’t even realize it until Kai’s voice breaks through the quiet of the room, filled with concern.

“Hey,” he says softly, his eyes instantly narrowing as they scan your face. “What’s going on? Are you okay?”

You quickly swipe at your face, trying to clear the tears, but they keep coming, one or two slipping past your efforts.

“I’m fine,” you insist, shaking your head as you laugh nervously. “It’s nothing bad, I promise.”

But Kai is unconvinced. He steps closer, his brow furrowing with concern, and he gently takes a step toward you, his eyes searching yours. “You’re crying, y/n.” he points out, teasing but with an undercurrent of worry. “Is this because I’m the artist behind all those paintings? Was it that dramatic for you?”

You freeze, blinking up at him, and before you can catch yourself, you let the words slip out.

“I… I just think I’m falling for you, okay? You keep surprising me.”

The words escape before you can stop them, and you freeze, horrified by your own slip. A sharp blush spreads across your cheeks, and you take a step back, raising your hands defensively.

“Wait, no, I didn’t mean—”

Kai blinks, his eyes widening slightly, and then he grins, a teasing smirk creeping onto his lips. “Falling for me, huh?” he tilts his head slightly, his voice taking on a playful tone. “Was it the art that did it? Getting you all emotional like that? Here I thought you were crying because you were upset.”

Your face burns with embarrassment, and you’re about to stammer out some kind of awkward excuse when Kai steps forward, his grin softening.

You open your mouth to explain, but nothing comes out. The silence stretches, and the embarrassment makes your chest tighten. You look down at your feet, feeling the heat rush to your cheeks. You want to say something—anything—to fix this, to undo the slip. But before you can even manage a breath, Kai’s hand gently lifts your chin, his touch soft but firm.

You glance up at him, trying to gather your thoughts, but before you can speak, Kai leans in and closes the distance between you, slowly tilting your face upward. Your breath hitches in your throat, and before you can process what’s happening, his lips are on yours.

You freeze, the suddenness of it making your heart skip a beat. The world seems to blur around you, and for a few seconds, you don’t know how to react. But then, slowly, your nerves ease, and something inside you unravels. You find yourself responding, your hand moving to the back of his neck, pulling him closer as the kiss deepens, soft but full of unspoken emotion.

When you finally pull back, your chest is tight, your breath shallow. You look at him, a little dazed, unsure of what just happened but feeling the heat of it all. Kai’s smile is softer now, his eyes locked on yours with an intensity that makes your heart race even more.

“You’re not the only one,” he says quietly, his thumb brushing against your cheek. “I’ve been falling for you too, y/n.”

The moment he confirms that he feels the same way, something inside you shifts—like a switch has been flipped, igniting something deep within you. You're not sure what it is, but it’s electric, a surge of warmth that floods your chest. Slowly, your hand, which had been resting on the back of his neck, moves upward to gently slide through his hair. The sensation of his softness beneath your fingers sends a thrill through you, and your breath catches as you look at him with dazed eyes.

Heat spreads through your body within seconds, an intense pull toward him that you can’t ignore.

Everything feels sharper, more vivid, the air between you charged with something undeniable.

“You can't just stop there, you know...” you murmur softly, almost like a whisper, your voice barely breaking the silence. The words feel delicate, but there’s a quiet hunger in them that you didn’t expect.

Kai’s gaze shifts instantly—deeper, more intense. His eyes darken, and something in the air between you changes, as though the entire room tightens around the both of you. You feel it in the way he looks at you, like he’s reading you, understanding what you need even before you do.

“Who told you I was going to stop there?” His voice drops lower, laced with something darker, more deliberate.

“We're just getting started, noona.”

Oh well, I guess we're saving Genshin and Pokémon for next time.....

------------------

[saintslewis]

“𝐀𝐧𝐠𝐞𝐥𝐬 𝐢𝐧 𝐓𝐢𝐛𝐞𝐭” - 𝐂𝐋𝟏𝟔

pairing: charles leclerc x fem!reader

summary: charles celebrates his birthday in Cape Town and meets his angel

warnings: mild smut (MDNI 18+), kissing, outfit descriptions.

saint’s team notes: my first kinktober special!!! obv i’m doing this because it’s my second boyfriend’s birthday today and i wanted to release in honour of him so i hope you guys enjoy this! it’s quite short but bare with me y’all!!!! sorry for typos and Taglist is down below! happy birthday charles!!

kinktober with Saint!

-

His eyes were stuck on you as they have been the whole night.

He had watched you sway your hips in such sensual ways, your arms often touching your body as if you were calling him to you although you only made eye contact once. Your mini dress was cherry red, contrasting with your melanin skin and your jewellery shined brightly underneath the club lights.

The Cape Town aura was everything Charles thought it would be like. The smell of the Atlantic Ocean, the colourful buildings, the delicious food, the beautiful people who welcomed him so warmly. He truly loved it there, fulfilling his travel bucket list to touch down in South Africa.

Sitting in an open booth in Cabo,  an exclusive beach club,and he hasn't taken his eyes off you since you entered the club with your friends. To him, it looked like you had a light on you wherever you went and the beat of whatever song was playing was beating through his entire body, feeling even closer to you than ever.

Before he knew it, sparkles and a whole bunch of people blocked his vision from you. His friends and different bottle girls sang happy birthday loudly, swinging around a large sign that read his name and 'happy birthday' underneath. Eventually focusing on everything around him, he smiled and thanked everyone and took a celebratory shot with all his friends. It was if the music played louder and his section filled up every second with girls wanting to throw themselves at him but what absolutely gutted him was that he lost sight of you, the light in the club no longer shining.

Signaling to his friends and seemingly other people that he would be right back, he hurried towards the dance floor hoping to spot you but he didn't have any luck. Seeing some of your friends still in the club, he calmed himself down a little until he noticed one of your dress tassels literally floating as you walked out of the club as if he was meant to see it.

Charles then decided to go outside just to see where you were, greeting everyone who stopped him for photos and photographs but he knew he had to hurry to see you. Eventually getting outside, he walked over to his rented Ferrari to seem as if he was looking for something, not seeing you standing at the back of the supercar, facing the ocean.

"I see you've been looking for me." You say, leaning against the car as his eyes found yours and he felt like everything lifted from his shoulders. There genuinely was a light around you but he didn't want to seem crazy and scare you off, not when he finally gets to talk to you.

Instead of responding to you, he came closer to you as he watched your smile become bigger. "Happy birthday, Charles." You wished him, making him lean against the car while you leaned on him, manicured hands on his chest. He blushed as he saw the close proximity you both were in. Finding his words, he finally responded. "T-thank you..um I don't know your name." He nervously chuckled as you kept eye contact with the Monagesque.

"My name's Y/n. You know Charlie, I'm here to fulfill one of your birthday wishes." You smirked up at the man, playing with his shirt. "My birthday wish?" He asked, his breath hitching when your hands went onto his waist.

"To whoever is listening, I ask to meet a beautiful woman and end my birthday well." You quoted him perfectly in French, the same words he said out loud this morning. "How did you know I said that?" Charles asked, his eyebrows furrowing as he gained the courage to hold your waist. "Like I said, I'm here to make you happy, sent by those who love you and yes, I know you didn't tell a single soul about your wish but I listened to you." You stated, tracing all types of shapes on his chest.

Noticing his face still made a confused expression, you smiled a little bit before patting his chest. "Okay, how about this? Wish for anything right now." You suggested and stepped back a little, making him frown at the loss of touch between you two. "Anything?" "Anything you want, Charlie."

"I wish for your dress to be pink." He wished, making you smile at the simplicity of the wish. Right before his eyes, your mini dress turned pink with a few sparkles around it. Astonished, the man pulled you closer to him with a smirk on his face. "Let's go celebrate my birthday then." He said, holding onto your waist quite gently.

With the snap of your fingers, you were in his hotel room and you straddled him with his face in your hands. Smashing your lips together, his large hands brought you closer to his body with your dress slowly rising up. Unbuttoning his shirt as slowly as you could, you kissed his neck and created marks on him.

Charles groaned as you pushed yourself down on him, gripping your ass as you continued to do so even though his shirt was off. Looking into each others eyes, they hung low as you leaned to pepper kisses on him before fully making out with him.

"Cherí, please, I need to taste you." He begged as he positioned the both of you to where he was in between your legs, heels long gone. Kissing down your body whilst the dress was still on you, he lifted your legs higher once he reached your dampned core. Kissing through your  red lace underwear, you moaned softly as he repeatedly kissed your clit.

"Happy Birthday, Charlie." You wished him once again as he took off your underwear and placed it in his pants that felt incredibly tight on him at the moment.

"Thank you Cherí." He leaned forward to give you one last kiss on your lips before going down on you as you filled the air with your moans combined, the Cape Town skyline shining through the hotel window as you two loved on each other for hours.

The morning after, Charles was relieved to find you laying on his chest looking like the angel that you were. Your skin was glowing as the hickies were littered all over your body along with his scratches on his back. He hoped that you weren't going to leave him soon after the time you had spent together.

Hoping you'll never leave his side.

taglist: @httpsserene @lorarri @non-stop-imagines @evieash @folkloresthings @goldenleclerc @goldsainz

let me know if you wanna be tagged!

[ego-meliorem-esse]

you spoke about Arthur's capability to love but what about Francis? Is his view of love jaded by the years? I think the one who still holds some sort of romantic streak is Alfred, who's obviously the type of guy to have huge hopes and dreams about love, mostly unrealistic and over the top only focusing on getting what he wants. Just wondering, I find your view interesting

OH boy! I mostly agree with youu!

François is someone whos been around for so long that any kind of expectation of 'true love' is thrown out the window, even burried in the depts of the Seine, erroded with the ages. Though, has always been self serving, naivity of youth still gave him hope and belief in love to a certain point. Now however, he is still romanticising the concept yet never practicing it himself. He can read love poems, watch sad french movies shot in black and white, yet he is a cynical man. It's the duality that makes this man so complex.

Speaking of complexities and duality: Alfred is a good example of someone who is both idealistic yet observant. In his heart, deep down there hides a spark of desire for that 'human love' he sees people experience. However, he is intelligent enought to know that will not happen. not only due to his nation-person nature, but becouse of who he is. Alfred is willing to sacrifice anything and everything to get his way. "If I can't play by my rules, I'm playing a different game" sorta thing. that usually doesn't work out well with love and such strong emotions. He isn't willing to negotiate, he isn't willing to settle and he isn't willing to let someone else 'win'. I wanted to use the word selfish so many times, but frankly I don't think it fits. He isn't selfish in the pure sense of the word. Whatever he does is guided by the belief that he is doing what is best and optimal. In a sense his 'selfishness' comes from having a hard time seeing other ways and perspectives on certain matters.

It's hard to keep Alfreds attention on anyone for an extended period of time and Alfred knows this. so in this example, his belief is that it's best to not engage in any long lasting romantic flings and not establish emotional connections. Better for the other person that is. In truth he is vey uncomfortable with exposing a non perfect and slightly unstable side of himself.

The Hollywood smile can hide all.

He's a start up who came onto the superpower playing field at a time when expectations and requirements were too high. A colonial bumpkin who has to prove himself everyday. Prove that he is up to the challange despite actually having the ability to raise hellfire. An echo of "He is too young", "He lacks experience" and "He isn't the sort" following him with every step. I wanna relate this to what you asked about his ability and want of true love: Alfred needs to suceed. He is in a corridor and the only thing he is looking at is the big door at the end. he doesn't have time, nor is he willing to take a break while running to that door. Alfred knows what he want and has to do, so love is a distraction he isnt willing or able to give to anyone for long enought to matter.

Absolutely wild and long rant. i'm sorry if its uncomprehensible or typo infested my autocorrect is not working waaaaaahhhhhh

[triplexdoublex]

It's obvious that some of y'all joined the fandom only recently (and that's okay, just don't rewrite 'history' to fit a PR 'fake love' narrative).

Just because this playlist was made public one day before her bday, It does not proof it's a gift.

(And why the hell would he be so inspired to do such a beautiful gesture for her bday after the ALLEGED video of bday wishes she might have sent him while being on somebody else's ... If you don't know what I'm talking about, just go read blind items. NASTY, yuck).

Let's take a look at "Taurus sun" playlist. -'Ocean eyes' is of course about his daughter. -Lana del Rey is an artist whom Megan have had actual LITERAL beef with, but Megan been using lately as an IG caption to garner his attention. Kells actually has an unreleased colab song from 2018 with her (watch them say 'Bad for you/Mad for you' is about her too...). There is no actual proof of what I'm about to say but it seems she is an artist he was first SUPPOSEDLY introduced to by his ex (he sampled 'video games' more than a decade ago in an old French Montana collab). -'I'm lost without you' by Blink is the song of him and *HIS* ex (the proof of this Is in the lyrics of "her song", the pt. 1 to "in these walls"). These two must have met indeed at Blink 182's concert. -I have my PERSONAL theory about the song 'I rather go blind'. Let's just say Colson looked incredibly hurt during 2014/2015 and I PERSONALLY think this song could explain why. .-'The funeral' is a Song he was quoted listening to during the 2018 Galore interview (he made for that occasion a Photoshoot inspired by Romeo+Juliet movie... take a look at it, it's very beautiful, I'm sure you'll like it). .-Idk about the other songs (maybe I give her Tennesse since it is Megan's birth state).

Also I'm sure more than one woman has inspired him. He has been with countless women before Megan (COUNTLESS, funny how Megan says he's akward with girls) and actually have had TWO meaningful main (somehow toxic too) situationships/relationships

.And let's say I was wrong and all the playlist was done FOR her and only her. It does not mean it's about her.Just like the songs he makes. They could be dedicated to her but this does not mean they are FOR or ABOUT her (and she must know that because so many time in the past she felt the Need to stress the opposite).

Having said so, sorry for any typos and Imma go listen to "fake love". bye.

I’ve just learned of this playlists existence today in that ask. My reply was my first thoughts upon seeing those songs. However you are correct, I had forgotten he’s mention “lost without you” in that song about his ex looong before him and Megan were together. Perhaps it’s just a playlist of meaningful songs to him, I dunno and I don’t claim to.

But he fr needs to drop that song with Lana , I was so obsessed with it when we got that little teaser it seems like such a sexy song.

[manonamora-if]

March Check-In

Lol. We definitely were not back on track here. We tried and SUPER FAILED at going back to the schedule.

Will March be better? Let's find out together...

Onto the usual index:

Recap of last month’s progress

IF Events in the Next Month

Plan for the next month

Still long post under the break. If you want a mini version, head over to itch.io!

February Progress

Welp... there wasn't much of a list in the January Check-in, since it was the retrospective, which included the yearly plan. Still, I did make a mini one on itch. Put together we'd get:

Play more IF and maybe review. ✅

Finish the coding of Harcourt Ch5 ❌ and editing of Ch6 ❌

Fix one of the semi-completed games: ❌

Complete the Vamp/Smoochie jam entry✅

Heyyyy 50/50. Passable grade!

I've passed the very funny number of 420 reviews on the IFDB recently, mainly working my way through the French games (since there are very few reviews and French IF peeps are neat people). There are 300+ games left on that side, it will take me a while to get there but I'm making progress (almost done with 2023!). If my pace continues... I might be able to reach 2nd place in the ranking before my 1 year anniversary of reviewing games (mid-may). Also somewhat related, I've been trying to rate more games on itch too :)

I said I would finish the coding of Harcourt... and then didn't. But MelS was more productive than me, and he finished the first draft of Chapter 6 earlier than planned... which I haven't finished commenting on either... So :/

I also didn't fix any semi-completed games. So there.

But I managed to make it for the Queer Vampire Jam and the Smoochie Jam with Teatime with a Vampire ! A 20k-long trippy game with a hot vampire and a weird show...

AND AND I finally fixed my website and my itch.io profile. It has a cool feature on the front page. And we did a little AMA a few weeks ago!

Honestly, I thought I would have been done with Teatime two weeks before it actually was completed. So that threw a wrench in the rest. And probably having to moderate a few events at once...

And the extra day clearly didn't help.

EDIT: I TOTES FORGOT, but I updated DOL-OS for an extra QOL screen at the start.

What’s happening in March?

There's always something happening in the IF world. I don't think I ever find all that happens anyway... but. Here's the ones I know!

Today is the last day to submit a Spring Thing intent! (ranked)

he Queer Vampire Game Jam ends in about three weeks. Got a vampire/human story with a LGBT+ cast? Then this is the event for you! (unranked) Also they are doing a fundraising/matching donation with submissions!

The SeedComp! (Sprouting) extended the deadline for a few more days! See @seedcomp-if for more info ;) (ranked)

Concours de Fiction Interactive Francophone 2024 se termine Lundi! Viendez faire des histoires en français!! <3 (ranked, duh)

The next @neointeractives mini-jam will all be about bringing back old jams... Check out the Revival Jam !

The Text Adventure Literacy Jam 2024 just started! It will be looking for "parser for beginners" entries until May!

Note: @neointeractives will have jams all year long. One a month/or so. And the next Planting Round of @seedcomp-if will start as soon as the results are dropped.

The PLANtm for March

Busy plan once again. Here are the thing I'm hoping to do or finish this month:

Complete my French Comp entry. The deadline is in 3 days. Will I make it? Probably. Will it be good? Probably be not because I've been writing it only in the past two weeks. You can expect some "love" letters though...

Complete my SpringThing entry. It will be all about fixing typos and potential bug. The code will be ready next week anyway. Maybe slap some cool-er animations.

Play more games! Consider this done. There's the Smoochie Jam, the SeedComp! and the FrenchComp right there...

Finish the Code Ch5 of Harcourt and edit Ch6. At least one round of edits would be good. So I can put MelS to work again.

Finish fixing The Roads Not Taken. I'm so sorry babe. I'm not avoiding you I swear. I actually haven't bee on the computer with your files this month...

LET'S DO THIS! WE CAN DO IT!

~

The 2024 To-Do List:

I have done nothing here. So here's the list again for nothing.

The hopefully maybe easy to handle To-Do:

fix the bugs in EDOC + overall the French version to match

fix the bugs of TRNT + find a way to add the missing pieces (giving up on the translation)

fixing the interface of LPM and the popups + check animal interactions

figure out the One-Button JavaScrip/jQuery issue...

edit the loading screens of the completed tiny games to include the program/format logo at least.

The 'Need a Bunch of Content to update but it's planned!' To-Do:

Update my website (bunch new title - also I don't think the logo clicky thing work...) + redo my itch page

Finish TTATEH (MelS dependent - this year should be it - for real)

Finish Exquisite Cadaver (half-way mark by this summer - manif)

Finish P-Rix - Space Trucker (main path at least)

Update CRWL (it's been almost two years... I'm getting ashamed)

The Unlikely But it Would be Dope To-Do

Finish The Dinner as it was planned (and translate)

Finish In the Blink of an Eye as it was planned (and retranslate)

Finish The Rye in the Dark City

Fixing TTTT (at least fixing, maybe try adding some storylets)

And finally The 'It's impossible, but one can wish' TO-DO:

Remaster SPS IH (if I managed to start this after completing the rest... I'm going to eat a whole sheet cake).

Start the IFComp project (2025? Might end up being a ST?)

[vingt-soixiante]

Hi Vingt, genuine question, I don't want to be rude or anything I'm genuinely curious and I know that sometimes people don't care about typos or even like having typos so really I don't want to be rude with this!

Why is you username Vingt-Soixiante and not Vingt-Soixante? 60 or soixante only has one i, is it a typo or intentional?

I've just been wondering since I see you in my inbox often

Also, im wondering do you speak french a lot? Did you like take a french class in school or something?

But yeah that's it. I think your pfp is very silly, loving it lol

-Luh

It actually is unintentional lol, all my other accounts with this name does not have the extra I, I just never noticed it I guess

Actually fun fact, originally I was actually Vignt-Soixante. When making my email I did a typo that I do when I type fast and swapped two letters. I tried to roll with it, but after like 10 people came up to me and corrected me I said "fuck it FINE I'm spelling it properly." I love the french language. I spent 3 weeks in France over the summer just learning it, which didn't go very well tbh. I have no french classes where I live, I have no french speakers where I live, but yet still I love speaking french. I'm actually not that fluent, and I've kinda stopped practicing in order to focus on college, but I think I can still have a text conversation if I try. I've previously even thought about moving to France, which sounds fun, but I think I'm soulbounded to the woods out here

[the-knightmare]

20 Questions for Fic Writers

Thanks to @daddygrandpaandthebeaver for the tag.

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

30

2. What’s your total word count?

44,659

3. What fandoms do you write for?

I write for mostly The Legend of Zelda and Bob's Burgers, but I have written for Escape Room and had thoughts about Six of Crows stuff. And that one Uncle Obi-Wan fic I did for flufftober last year.

4. Top 5 fics by kudos

Too Late

Seeking Solace With You

A Life Interrupted

Stay in Bed

I Met You in a Closet

The first and third aren't surprising, they're both older works of mine. Too Late is an angsty coldfalsh fic I wrote back when I was into the the Flash/Legends of Tomorrow. A Life Interrupted is my unfinished Roudise soulmate au (perhaps the upcoming theme week will motivate me to finish).

I was actually really happy to see Seeking Solace With You to be the second most popular. It's one that I'm proud of, and put a bit more into emotion-wise.

I'm actually surprised Stay in Bed and I Met You in a Closet (both zelink) made it into the top five as I didn't think they were my best works.

5. Do you respond to comments?

I respond to some of them. I'm a bit shy/anxious and I tend to overthink what I say. I absolutely love every comment I get, and I read every one even if I'm slow to respond.

6. What’s the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

That would be Too Late, as it deals with the aftermath of The Flash's season three finale where Barry enters the speedforce (I had to refresh my memory of what happened it's been so long, haha).

7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

Since I love happy endings, there's a few of them. I'll highlight two and cheat a little:

A Call to Ears: A roudise fic where Louise catches Rudy trying on her bunny ears.

And

Dancing with Freckles and Glasses: a Telink fic post Wind Waker where Link helps Tetra practice dancing before a ball.

8. Do you get hate on fics?

Luckily no, even when I make typos and errors.

9. Do you write smut?

I do not. The most I do is hint and let readers make their own decisions.

10. Do you write crossovers?

No, not really.

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

As far as I know, I have not.

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

Nope.

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

I have not.

14. What’s your all-time favorite ship?

I cheat again, as I love both Roudise and zelink.

But I also love a lot of ships that I don't write, but read and enjoy canon material of.

15. What’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you will?

There are a few I have in early stages of writing in notebooks or scraps in a word doc, not much of note.

I suppose A Life Interrupted is one that I have no idea if I'll actually finish since I would have to think of a new way to end it. A good gist of what I may have originally meant as an ending can be read in Hidden in Plain Slide where I have some of my headcannon of Louise not liking things changing is on display, as well as the running away after a confession.

16. What are your writing strengths?

I had a comment on a fic that mentioned nonsexual intimacy and friendship underlying the characters attraction, and I would say that I always try to write relationships that feel balanced in their romantic elements.

I also think I've learned how to tell when something is working and when something is needed to make it work. Especially keeping character's true to their characterizations as best I can. So long as it sounds proper, I'm happy.

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

Finishing multi-chapter fics. It haunts me that I haven't finished A Life Interrupted, and every so often I think of it.

I could stand to go over my writing for typos and mistakes more. If I think about it too much, I'm sure I could think of a million things.

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language?

I could only do French outside of English, but I wouldn't. While I'm technically bilingual, I'm fairly rusty and don't have confidence to write a whole story in French.

19. First fandom you wrote for?

It would either be Harry Potter or the City of Ember all the way back in my fanfic.org days.

20. Favorite fic you’ve ever written?

I'm going to cheat again and list some I haven't mentioned yet:

Morning Person (roudise)

Burger Approval (zekina, with the Bob and Zeke relationship as a focus)

Lies Carved in Stone (zelink)

This was an interesting one. For tags, if anyone wants to do it, then feel free.

[videcoeur]

Pinned Post + BYF (2024 edition)

Time for another update to the pinned post because heck, its been another year and things keep changing! And I keep defining what my hobbies are and how much time I dedicate to each! So, without further ado, here's the new, improved (but mostly shortened) BYF/Pinned post.

To Know Before Following

Multimuses RP + Art blog owned by a 30+ native French Canadian mun. Typos happen.

No minors allowed.

I will block anyone who uses AI art or fanart (without permission) for their icons/reactions pics.

I RP both Canon and OCs from various fandoms and fandomless. Here is the tag list so you can block what you don't wanna see.

Most of my characters are VILLAINS. If I have to tell you mun isn't muse, you're probably not gonna like this blog.

I like a lot of promo posts from the rp tags, if I liked yours, its probably because I'm interested in your blog! I usually let people follow first though since I have a lot of fandoms here and don't know how okay people are with that c:

Mostly interested in multi-para rp! Will only reply about once a month as I'm busy, often ill, and have multiple partners.

I tag most common triggers, tell me if you need a specific tag.

Full Rules HERE

I will almost never be the one to reach out due to an extremely busy schedule and because I do not reply fast. It's not lack of interest as much as lack of time! If you understand that I Am Slow, you are more than welcome to reach out through DMs or memes or by adding me on Discord (Videcoeur).

Main Fandoms

The ones I post the most about are One Piece and Homestuck. You'll also find other animes and TV Shows around here. You can find the list HERE.

If you have any question, just dm me, I promise I don't bite c:

[gasstationlady]

tom holland’s school of manifestation | a charles leclerc social media au

pairing: charles leclerc x supermodel!reader

charles has a big crush on world renowned supermodel, y/n l/n. who would’ve thought she’d return the feelings.

notes: very much travis kelce x taylor swift inspired. faceclaim is yasmin wijnaldum! btw i try to improve with each post (like how i write/pace the story) so if you have any suggestions, pls (veryvery kindly) tell me!! :))

disclaimer: SORRY FOR TYPOS. GOOGLE TRANSLATE (and from american high school lol) FRENCH. KYM ILLMAN MENTIONED LOL. none of the information in this social media au is factual. i do use old photos of charlotte and charles, and usually i don't like to include pictures of their ex or current gfs in these fics (only bc i want to keep it as imaginative as possible and i feel like adding them kinda gives you a reality check while reading LOL) so lmk your opinions on that!

masterlist

voguemagazine

liked by yourusername, charles_leclerc and 854,487 others

voguemagazine Since beginning modeling at the age of 14, Y/N L/N has cemented herself as the most influential supermodel of all time. As of 2023, she is now the world’s highest paid model surpassing Kendall Jenner who previously led the list. Throughout her career, she has made 39 appearances on international Vogue covers.

Tap the link in our bio to read the full profile. Photographed by @/leannafitz, Written by Phil Stevenson, Styled by @/sheri_simmons, Vogue, February 2023.

View all 942 comments

user MOTHER IS MOTHERING

user omg as someone who has been a fan since she began in 2011, i’m so proud of her 😭

user she's the definition of perfection

user LOL ariana (charles), what are you doing here

↳ user his little crush on her is soo cute 😩

↳ user he’s just like us fr lmaoo

user her walk is legendary like it reminds me so much of naomi

user i was gonna say she’s the model of our generation but that’s wrong. she’s actually the top model of all time 😩😩😩

user i’m glad to see a non-nepo baby be on top of the list

↳ user no literally like no shade to bella, kendall, and them but y/n had to fight tooth and nail to be here

↳ user frrr bc most of the nepo baby models are great, don’t get me wrong. however, they were allowed to make mistakes during their career in order to improve. y/n was not privileged enough to have that. like ppl don’t understand the insane expectations that were placed on her ever since she entered the industry, but she exceeded those expectations every. single. time. and that’s why she deserves this title

user she’s so beautiful

user i would die for y/n

user nothing could describe the amount of affection i have for this woman omfg

charleslc_updates

42,077 likes

charleslc_updates Charles and Arthur talking about Y/N L/N (again lol) in a recent interview 👀

View all 396 comments

user lmaoooooo relatable

user omg i'm new to f1 but i've always been a y/n stan i'm freaakkkinng out but wdym again??

↳ user lmaooo charles is always trying to bring up y/n

user the leclerc brothers 🥰🥰

user it was so cute to see the both of them in one video

user this man fr blushed AHAH cute

user i get it charles i too have the biggest crush on y/n

↳ user lol literally like get in line dude

↳ user back of the line bucko

user i've never seen a man so down bad for someone he's never met

user y/n what are you doing girl if you don't want him ILL DO IT

user @/yourusername

↳ user LMAO YESSS @/yourusername

ynupdates

239,095 likes

ynupdates Y/N opening the 2023 Chanel by Karl Lagerfeld show during Paris Fashion Week.

View all 3,977 comments

user omg she absolutely killed it

user god does she need a dog? i can bark

user i love seeing her thrive

user quick charles this is your chance!!! she’s in paris 😭😭😭 @/charles_leclerc

↳ user lmaooooo not you tagging him but literally though

↳ user no srsly please mr. "i hope our paths cross soon" you don't understand i need this to happen

user yall saw that walk??? ugh y/n the woman that you are

user i don’t get the hype. all she does is walk.

user NAHHHH SHE ATEEE THAT

user i’m so happyyyy 🥺 y/n is so booked and busy she’s really out here doing multiple back to back shows for paris fashion week

↳ user same! it’s crazy that she gets to open and close multiple shows, especially ones like chanel!

user i love that so many people are going to these shows just to see y/n

user i could make this exact dress with my curtains

user if i ever meet her in real life i would die happily

yourusername

liked by charles_leclerc, bellahadid and 5,490,124 others

yourusername rien de mieux que d'etre a la maison [no place like home]

View all 12,658 comments

gigihadid sexy lady

↳ yourusername already missing you

user i keep forgetting she's part french

user you absolutely KILLED those shows

voguemagazine iconic ⭐️

alexademie 🔥🔥

user beautiful girl!!

user omggg charles liking this LOL

↳ user it's actually frustrating me that this man has no game like i'm rooting for you cmon

↳ user lmaooo literally though i'm just hoping he's pulling some strings behind the scenes

anokyai 😍😍😍

user la plus belle fille [the most beautiful girl] *liked by charles_leclerc

↳ user if this is him shooting his shot 😭😭

↳ user lol charles is down so bad he's even going through the comments

user am i just crazy but why are there two drinks in the second post? like is this supposed to be a very soft launch

↳ user it's probably gigi 😭😭 she did comment saying that they were hanging out with each other

↳ user but why not just take a pic of her tho

deuxmoi

31,844 likes

deuxmoi Y/N L/N & Charles Leclerc spotted hanging out with each other in Paris

View all 992 comments

user NO WAY OMG

user i'm actually in disbelief how tf did charles get here

user i knew you could do it charles!!

user TURN IT UP IVE BEEN WAITING FOR THIS ONE

user so are they dating???

user CHARLES FR WINNING RN AHAH

↳ user NO LITERALLYYY HES BEEN DREAMING ABOUT THIS FOR AGES

↳ user he manifested this 😭

user they look sooo good together

user why does he look so srs

↳ user give my man a break 😩

↳ user well it looks like he’s not your man anymore 😭😭

user omgg this is like a fairytale

user wait i'm kinda obsessed with this

user i’m so invested

kymillman

201,885 likes

kymillman Y/N AND CHARLES

Ferrari driver Charles Leclerc is joined at the track today by top supermodel, Y/N L/N. This is the first time Y/N is with him and she clearly shines in front of the camera.

Her debut at the grid has quickly become a popular topic as fans and drivers alike are intrigued by the presence of one of the most famous women in the world.

For A3 prints, hand-signed & numbered by a range of drivers/team principals head to kymillman.com #f1 #formula1 #signedprints #japanesegp #CharlesLeclerc #Y/NL/N

View all 971 comments

user SHDJEJ IM ACTUALLY GOING FERAL

user mom and dad 😩

user so it’s official???

↳ user i mean this is the hardest launch they could have done other than posting 😭

user i’m a charles fan and even i’m surprised he got her to date him

user i’m rooting for them so much 🥺🥺

user she’s serving though

user i’m watching the race rn and they literally keep talking about y/n being there AHH

↳ user i always forget she’s kind of a big deal

user kym gets on my nerves but this picture is actual gold

user it's so obvious that this is a publicity stunt

↳ user nah but for who? bc i know damn well that neither charles nor y/n need it

↳ user obviously not for them but maybe it's to gather more attention for f1

↳ user girl i need u to listen to urself rn 😭 bc that makes no sense

user idk who charles is and idk what the hell f1 is but best believe i’m tuning in next race just to see y/n

↳ user literally me girl i can’t believe i’m watching cars drive in a circle rn

yn_updates

91,922 likes

yn_updates Some moments of Y/N being mentioned by drivers during the Formula 1 race

View all 1,061 comments

user i swear it was like every minute i'd hear y/n's name

user the way that all the drivers are aware of charles's long time obsession with y/n LOL

↳ user i just know charles is the type to never shut up about her ahaha

user she's literally THE y/n l/n. i mean if viewers are sky rocketing just by her being there, imagine her impact if she had actively promoted it

↳ user she's so iconic

↳ user no bc i love y/n so much that i just forced myself to watch rich grown men vroom vroom in circles for almost 2 hrs just to catch a glimpse of her

user i'm in love with her life

user LMAOOO THE DRIVERS TEASING CHARLES

user lando's so funny 😭😭

user y/n and f1 stans are being FED today wow

user is it just me or am i kinda annoyed about how often they're bringing her up like my girl can't even support her bf in peace

↳ user yea i'm eating it up but also feeling bad for y/n at the same time. the attention is definitely a double edge sword.

user apparently she was with joris most of the time 🥺

user this is literally straight from a fairy tale i can't

user didn't they just meet like a week ago

↳ user as far as we know they were first spotted together about a month ago by that deuxmoi post. but assuming from y/n and charles's past relationships, i don't think they'd be this comfortable going public without being together for a while

↳ user yea this has definitely been going on longer than we think/have been seeing

charles_leclerc

liked by yourusername, gigihadid, landonorris and 7,712,083 others

charles_leclerc J'ai toujours su que c'était toi. Joyeux anniversaire, mon amour ❤️ [I've always known it was you. Happy birthday, my love]

View all 34,511 comments

yourusername merci, mon cœur ❤️ [thank you, my heart]

yourusername je suis raide dingue de toi [i'm madly in love with you]

↳ charles_leclerc l'amour de ma vie [the love of my life]

user are we interrupting something...

user i can’t believe it’s already been 6 months since they first went public

user throwing myself down the stairs as we speak

user they don't know it yet but we're actually a throuple

user happy birthday y/n!!!

user in love with their love 🥺

user lmfaoooo i just know charles is on cloud 9 this man literally sees y/n and is blind to everything else

↳ user he's sooo cute, he's like a love sick puppy

user i still think this is a pr relationship

user god i'd die for someone to look at me the way charles looks at y/n in that second pic

user this is my roman empire

user i'm so obsessed with them it's insane

user our generation's brad and angelina

↳ user don't say that wtf my parents are never separating

user pls don't ever breakup 😭😭

[cherrytreeshipper]

a lot more people than usually see my posts saw my wedding post and i got a few new followers from it (hi new followers 👋) so i decided to go through and explain everyone in the group photo because most people aren't gonna know who most of these characters are (under the cut because Long)

so to start off with we've got N and Sylvan, both of whom are simultaneously the bride and the groom and i'm only joking a little bit about that. If you don't know about them... you will. they're the stars of the show 'round these parts.

next we've got the pkmn bw and bw2 protagonists, hilbert, hilda, nate, and rosa. i inserted them in this picture last minute so they kind of all look like shit. (sorry rosa i did you so dirty) but uh anyway they're here because i wanted more people who like, would probably mostly show up at the wedding for N as opposed to most of the other characters in the picture who are Sylvan's friends and family. I also wanted more canon characters in the picture because there's a lot of OCs here. but there are two more canon characters here...

Anthea and Concordia! N's (often forgotten about :( ) sisters. Well. I don't think they ever explicitly say they see each other as siblings but they were all adopted by the same fucked up evil guy and the fandom calls them siblings and I Like That. Um... There's not a lot else for me to say about them. I also forgot about them until I got into PKMN IRL roleplay and most of my thoughts on them come from someone's roleplay blog about them. There's... not much to them in canon. Regardless, I think they're Neat.

But next up we've got Sylvan's half-siblings, Oliver, Laelia, and Willow! Oliver is a guy who pretends to be Kalosian (French) for fun and for profit, Laelia wants to be a professor who studies The Power Of Friendship, and Willow's like six years old, her personality is liking minecraft or something.

This is Aurelia, i've hardly talked about her Ever, but she was Sylvan's rival when they were teens. Sylvan soon realized he didn't like Pokémon battling and Aurelia eventually realized she still does like Pokémon battling but there's other stuff she'd rather be doing. I've gone back and forth over whether she now does Pokémon Musicals or works for Pokestar Studios. Maybe both?

Aaaaaand last on our journey we've got Sylvan's parents, Azalea and Vernon. I've gone back and forth about whether or not they were ever married but regardless of if they were married, they are Divorce. That's not a typo, They Are Divorce. Um. There's more stuff I could explain about them but it's complicated and would take forever I want to eat breakfast. bye

[asksoldieron]

SO-4: If I Hafta Have Paper Lace Crammed In My Head Every Time I Read This One Then You Do Too!

If there's a lot of engagement on this, this post is liable to get real long, beware before you expand.

I'll edit in the real art once I make some!

Welcome to the Engagement Lounge, for Meet Billie (SO-4) an instalment! Short comments can go in the replies, but there's a 475 character limit. Longer ones will need a reblog. Remember to @asksoldieron if you're reblogging someone else's reblog, so I can see it too!

Ha-ha, I'm going to make so many number-related typos and formatting errors. "Wait, is this #3 or #4?" It's #4, and Dr. Beetle owes Violet another dollar. Billie's whole name is Wilhelmina Roth, that's a Will Scarlet to keep Rob and John company on their adventures. Sometimes my little puns are so stealthy, I think I'm probably the only one who gets them. (See also "blue headphones with no wires and human teeth.")

So, of course, when I actually got around to writing this, I got "Billy, Don't Be a Hero" stuck in my head, on loop. It was not possible to pick anything else for the musical portion. And once I'd done three songs, I figured I'd probably end up doing all six with music. Hey, I wasn't able to illustrate them when I put them up, and my readers deserve some kinda bonus for their patience. (When I come back from this little break, there's gonna be an artsplosion.)

Billie's not fond of what they're doing either, but she's tougher about it. (I like my men injured and pathetic, and my women strong and competent but conflicted!) Greg doesn't mind as long as nobody hurts any animals. Erik isn't hurt, he's just... being kept in a box with all his needs being met like a hamster. He's fine!

You'll see the beginnings of the Cat Network later, when I have a little space for an important flashback. They did know Greg was willing to do this sort of thing, and, though you haven't seen it yet, Seth and Nicky used him for at least one emergency during the siege. But nobody knew just how much you could do with a silly god and a few friendly animals. People tend not to share information about gods, or write it down. There are often adverse consequences. You'll see some later!

Heehee, Erik tries to speak "Prokovian" (really Russian ala Google Translate, so you can plug it in and decode what they're saying) in this one. "Dobroye outré" is a little too French, but close enough that Mattie probably gets it, if he's listening.

And I had to go back and add the gumballs to this one! I knew they must have something, but when I came up with something that weird (it's for another pun, I just can't help myself!), I knew I had to foreshadow it a little. If they had a gun, maybe you'd just accept it, but gumballs... Anyway, John definitely doesn't want a gun. Nor should he have one. (I want to use them at least one more time, but I don't think I can in the most obvious place...)

[Back to the Site?]

[hanzajesthanza]

today was a really slow and rainy-grey saturday... i could find only the energy to go on a short grocery run, as well as... my copy of tower of fools (narrenturm) arrived in the afternoon, so... if you wanted my thoughts on the first half of the book, it's here:

no spoilers, just a lot of jumbled first reactions and some thoughts

i was going to refrain from posting that i had bought this book, because it opens up a bunch of questions to which i don't really have good answers for. so here's just a little "mind unplugged" from me

part 1 - why i decided to read the book

honestly, i kind of just got kind of frustrated that everyone knows the hussite trilogy is sapkowski's magnum opus, but i never see any discussion of it online. it's like saying that a food is widely known to be the most tasty, well, okay, but if i have never tasted it, what do i know of its taste? it just became a kind of thing that people know of and reference, but that they don't talk about beyond that.

and it occurred to me that that's really how the witcher books are treated in the wider witcher fandom. they're talked of as this thing that exists and is good, but people don't always talk about them. and thus, forming an opinion about this thing is impossible if you have not actually read it, so it's pointless to throw around opinions without any knowledge to back them up.

but i put off reading it for a variety of reasons.

the most obvious being that the witcher is "enough" and i don't need more to fulfill me. that's still the case, but i think the point here is not fulfillment, but curiosity? i think obviously i'm still obsessed with the witcher, but hearing about the hussite trilogy and how much better it is than the witcher, i have to say i was intrigued. also, because there's such little discussion of it online? interesting.

i also put off reading this because i was like: "I'm not gonna understand a lick of what's being said, i don't know anything about the history or the events referenced in this series." and yeah, that's true. but then it occurred to me that when i began the witcher, i didn't know anything about it either, and i just kind of went along for the ride, and that was pleasurable enough. so i just thought to myself, well, let me just embrace the fact that i don't know anything, and i can drift through the first book just following the story. i don't have to understand every single part of it, if i can just take pleasure from reading a story, that's okay - there's no wrong way to read, after all... and if i don't like it or don't understand anything, then i just won't post about it. and if i don't catch much, but later want to understand, i'll just read it again armed with more knowledge... plus i think i had to reread the witcher like at least three times (collectively, i read out of order) before i understood its more complex workings like politics and geography and timelines

and then, it was available. okay, we can hate on the english translations all we like, and i agree with all the criticisms, and even more, i love to find out about errors and point out typos and redactions and things like that. but for all the issues with the official translations, hey, they at least exist. and if i can buy a book for like seven bucks online, have it delivered to my doorstep and start reading, that makes my job easy. i don't have to scour, i can just open the book and read. even if some parts bring up questions for me...?

i was also reminded to read this because lux perpetua (the third book in the trilogy) got an official translation released last year october (a few months ago now) and david french also brought it up that he did the translation for the trilogy in that interview he did which was published last month... so it was just on my brain, and i didn't want to be reminded a third time

part 2 - hussite trilogy and the witcher saga

whenever someone comments about this series, people just go "it's not the witcher" and that's the only thing they have to say about it...? i think that it's not the witcher is why i'm reading it. though the witcher is also a key element in my decisions here (could you ever expect any differently from me, haha)

i want to see sapkowski's development as an author, especially with the novel format?? and a trilogy, too, that's different than a five-book saga with already established characters from short stories... anyways.

i think i wanted to see him start from the ground-up with a different (pre-established) setting and (new) cast of characters, to see how he works... as i go through a lot of the witcher, i often find myself asking if this is just a fantasy thing, a sapkowski thing, or just a coincidence that i'm reading too much into.

so i won't lie, i wanted to see what the similarities and differences are between the series. especially owing to the dynamic they have as series... that the witcher is like, a phenomenon, both nationally and internationally, it's spawned a "franchise" although i LOATHE to call it that, it's true, the name has become household one. whereas it seems, at least internationally, the hussite trilogy, despite being the better series (!!), rides on the witcher's coattails of fame, as all the publishers and reviewers say: "this is a series by sapkowski, the author of the witcher." i feel like that's the classic artist predicament, though, right - the work you kind of belt out is the one everyone flocks to, and the work that you pour your entire soul into is the one that gets less attention?

part 3 - okay actual opinions time

apologies some of these opinions are comparing-contrasting it with the witcher so you're just gonna have to deal with that

let's address if it's better than the witcher. okay, i can't really say for sure right now, because i'm only, again, almost halfway through the first book. so i'm just going from what i've seen so far. and what i can say is........ it depends.

the hussite trilogy is indeed more complex than the witcher. right now, it's making the witcher look like a YA series, or even a children's series. LOL. at least, that's how it's feeling for me at the moment, that this is like definitely an "adult fiction" in terms of its complexity... and what do i mean by complexity... it's kind of the result of many things. it's not that it's "harder" to read, though yes, it is also harder to read, being harder to read is not really the same thing as being "complex."

i think sapkowski is benefitting greatly from having the pre-established historical setting, history, and context. it's kind of like... you know in the movie ratatouille, when remy gets to the restaurant kitchen in paris and is able to fucking Cook because all the ingredients are there, prepped, fresh... it's like that.

in the witcher, i feel like sapkowski had to slowly and sometimes painstakingly build everything out, piece by piece, informing us as we go, and though he does not hold the reader's hand, there is a certain sense that the author is laying a foundation. here, i think sapkowski is still laying a foundation, there are a lot of expositional elements, but they're often conveyed through dialogue, and it's rarely, if ever, done with thoughts of the characters in their mind/narration. which has its benefits and downsides.

i honestly miss a lot of that expositional quality that the short stories have, like the first part of sword of destiny where geralt considers how the dryads shoot all humans, young and old, "get out of brokilon!" and the kind of straightforwardness of it all, like in the beginning of edge of the world where dhun and nettly explain that there are elves in the blue mountains "and we nae mix with one another"...

but i think how he's doing it here in narrenturm is also interesting, as it's kind of letting the reader come to their own conclusions about the world and the characters? like, the characters will discuss what's going on, but they will not reflect on expositional points as much. so, i think you have to already be clued-into the history to be able to judge what's going on for yourself. which is something i find very mature about it... what i find most enigmatic about this is that sapkowski seems to be so hands-off, even though this is unmistakably writing that is so hands-on. it feels like the reader is really given the freedom to feel things out for themselves, but at the same time, it's a deliberately planned work of fiction...

the only way i can put it is that the witcher feels like a fairy tale, and narrenturm is feeling like a diary. in the witcher, even though it's fairytales inverted and stood on their head, there are a lot of ways to go about understanding situations and characters as if they are from a fairy tale or an epic, there's a lot of tropes and laws that you can see being played with, and i feel like i can "trust" the characters to act in a certain way...? (though maybe that's just because i'm familiar with it by now?) the story kind of shows itself as being a story, and by the end, of course, everything is just a legend.

maybe it really is just the difference in genre (fantasy v. historical fantasy) but in narrenturm, i feel like the characters are even more realistic-to-life? (which sounds insane considering how realistic the witcher's characters are). something that people have said in forum posts is that reynevan is an idiot who always makes stupid decisions, and ok yeah, but in that sense he seems to me like any other twenty-three year old guy.

you know, there's like a stark difference between reynevan and say, cahir, another twenty-something knight of sapkowski's who's been "separated from his lady" (haha no. imo, ew. but in sapkowski's pov, right?). cahir's idealism of ciri is treated like this tragically idealistic destiny thing, whereas reynevan going after adele is just stupid and hormonal, lmao. (speaking of, okay, i'm tbh just waiting for nicolette to return right now, i like her just for the split moment she turned up and then disappeared...)

i mean, one could also say that dandelion acts like this, but you also have to admit that dandelion's womanizing is a joke for the most part and he's a comic character in this regard, and his character motivations are never really plot-relevant until they deeply involve geralt. whereas with reynevan, it's like his one serious character goal (one of two, along with avenging his (cut due to SPOILERS) but ykwim).

the characters feel like real Guys which is weird considering that i already thought the characters of the witcher to feel like real Guys. but this is just showing me how fairytale like they are...

related to this, maybe it is just me, maybe it it just because this is the beginning of my first read, but while i would say the hussite trilogy is shaping up to be a better show of technical skill than the witcher saga, i feel like personally i'm not deriving as much comfort from it. i kind of realized from reading just how significant the witcher is to me because of its very specific traits of dealing with themes of parenthood and you know, all of geralt's struggles with losing his daughter and getting her back... narrenturm isn't (yet) hitting these emotional highs and lows for me, but i think that's okay, because not every series has to do that and this story isn't about that.

reynevan as the main character so far is alright. again, i feel like he's a lot like a real person... he has some degree of self-awareness, that he is a novice in magic and doesn't have a lot of power, and also that he's enticed towards foolish (and hormonal) decisions, and also when things turn sour... but he isn't seeking to really get wise to the way of the world and is just trying to get what's personally important to him at the moment ... he has some morals, but isn't grandly risking himself to act on them...

so in this respect, reynevan feels a lot more realistic than geralt, who is like, mister tragic hero who leaps into action and then goes through terrible self-flagellating regret when he's fucked up... i mean, they both fuck around and find out (in reynevan's case, literally) but it feels different with reynevan than it does with geralt and maybe i just have to spend more time with him to put my finger on it... i will say that geralt is more relatable with or identifiable with, in most regards, which doesn't necessarily make either one of them "better," it's just different.

if you like the witcher the best way i can describe reynevan so far is like, the womanizing and stupidity of dandelion, the knightliness and youth and feelings of cahir, erm, the alchemy and ~cool hidden powers~ of regis? and also, he reminds me of jarre, but in a good way... yes, there are some similarities to lady of the lake ch. 6, i think...

other notable characters to me thus far (mild spoilers? eh?)

sterzendorf castle potentially being run by the fucking Girls is like one of the coolest concepts ive encountered, and even if this is never returned to, i love it just for the uncertainty at the end of that passage

i think zawisza the black's appearance is funny, being a real historical figure renowned for his reliability and loyalty, and in sapkowski's writing, he's introduced as like. an old man that farts. classic sapko. but he was interesting as he appeared and gave advice about battle...

hans mein igel, i was like okay... wtf when he showed up. i literally reread it five times to make sure i was understanding correctly (reading version of doing a double take, i guess). but also i was like um why is his name Literally the story duny is parodied from...

i've mentioned i'm waiting for nicolette (nikolette) to return, i feel like i'll really like her once she comes back aahhh... why do i feel like adele will turn out to be unfaithful to reynevan just like she was to her husband lol... i mean, she's already denounced him to try and save her own skin. but yeah i feel like our guy is totally deluding himself with these ideas of love and that's gonna be his fatal flaw...

anyways i'm kind of waiting for a well-developed female character to appear and have more page-time? so that brings me to dzierżka de wirsing OMG... hello... i love her, and in an odd way she reminds me of if angouleme was not as fucked up as she is... i hope she comes back soon??

scharley (szarlej) stands out to me as a unique character because he's one of the only priests in sapkowski's books that is not a total fool or powerful or corrupt cunt... yeah he's a bastard, but despite spurring the comic moments, he honestly seems like a stabilizer for reynevan and a good person for him to learn from?

and i'm kind of, as always, dissatisfied and a bit repulsed with the way sapkowski treats disabled people, but...

and finally

i have never been so scared of a guy that looks like this ^

my favorite thing so far has been the supernatural elements that just seem to fucking Pop Up out of nowhere. my jaw has actually dropped multiple times, i went back and reread to make sure i was understanding that this shit was actually going down. i said no spoilers so i won't spoil, but i'll just say there's some apparitions, some magic, and in particular, a vision scene (which reminded me of ciri's visions in time of contempt and lady of the lake!!) and i LOVE me a CRAZY VISION SCENE that blends into the real world... wow, i think that's one of the best uses of the writing medium to convey such a presence. i think every time i am just about to forget that this is a historical FANTASY, some crazy fantastical shit happens and i'm like ohhhhh shit what the fuck lmao.

as for humor, there's been a few hits and a few misses. i actually laughed at the sex scene which kicks off the whole thing (reminded me of geralt and fringilla in the library lmao), some referential history-relevant humor, and of course, the famed exorcism scene is a laugh. but there's also like some toilet/fart humor (which i'm never really a fan of, just too gross for me) and ~random rape joke~ of course, so... you know, there's some wins and some loses.

as for pacing and storytelling, it's like... if season of storms was actually good. hear me out. i thought season of storms having twenty chapters was fucking annoying and didn't fit with the rest of the witcher saga at all, etc. i've complained about it enough already. but this book has similar pacing, BUT.... it's actually working well, not against it. the quick chapters also make it feel like more of diary entries and less of 'fairytale storytelling', like i mentioned before.

what i think happened was that sapkowski got comfortable applying this style of chapters to his novels and then did another witcher novel and it did not work as well for that witcher novel because the witcher novels (of that size) were seven chapters.... and those styles of long chapters really work for the witcher (imo).

another thing i'll mention, but don't hate me or laugh at me for it. okay. ready...?

this is the series that should have gotten a TV adaptation.

seriously! it seems to me so much better to adapt to an episodic TV format than the witcher, which has both short stories and novels, and spends a longer time (relatively) explaining its characters and its world and letting the reader meditate on what it supposes. i am NOT saying netflix should pick it up, helllll no. but rather that this would be really good as a TV series.

[worldheadcanons]

ugh so first of all i was rereading my last ask, i'm really sorry for all the typos and grammar mistakes. i just say whatever i have on my mind and then press send. plus english isn't my first language :p. but feli... even outside of the stalker au, i see him as being a very manipulative and possessive bf. he even outdoes mattie !! like i imagine him being the flirty type, always nice to all the people around him and it could even make you think that he's not that serious about you but don't let that fool you nuh uh. you're the apple of his eye and always will be. if that makes sense. i believe that he's also trying really hard to come off as nonchalant but gd does he care so fucking much. and he shows u that not thru grandiose actions, but in the small things that he does for you. i imagine that as a stalker he's the type of guy to break into your home... and literally do your chores like washing the dishes or laundry. he's not even creepy about it tbh (mattie can't say the same i think he was jorkin it on the y/n's bed once or twice while they weren't home) and threaten the people he sees as competition behind your back. so feli is simultaneously well behaved but also the worst in the stalker au. sorry but imo feli isn't a gooner like mattie. i can continue btw i just don't want this ask to be too long

idm typos & spelling errors; english is my first language and i still suck at it :p i spell better w french bc i’m too scared to accidentally misspell a word lololol

feli making you feel like ur casual when rlly he thinks ur his soulmate. i think he wld 100% subscribe to that “childish” belief of like “you’re the only one, you’re my soulmate, i feel bonded with you, i’m yours” etc etc. even more so than the others, he believes that you’re meant to be together. so what if he flirts with another girl? she offers him only attention; you offer so much more.

also wld love for him to do my laundry. i hate folding my clothes UGH & ur also right, he’s not a gooner. he’s definitely more romantic if u cld call it that than sexual or sensual, unlike alfred or mattie poo.

yeah, feli is the worse in that he’s violent towards others, he can be manipulative towards you (making you feel less than, lovebombing at times even), he can be childish imo etc etc but he’s also.. genuinely helpful? gets things done for you, is sweet to you esp over phone. buys things for you. money is never an issue — he’s wealthy, actually, i think. idk, i get that vibe.

++ he has killed ppl or will kill ppl (cant decide which) i think he’s had obsessions in the past too but he’s convinced they were side quests, training so he’s perfected his craft (stalking) for you