#if you need further proof just look how these ppl react when you ask them what 'vetted' means

[bookshelfdreams]

ETA:

Employees of UNRWA were accused of having been directly, actively involved in the October 7th attacks. In nine cases, the evidence was strong enough that the UN fired those people.

You may say that 9 out of all the employees in Gaza (13k or so?) isn't that much, but in my opinion, the number of terrorists and murderers employed by an UN charity should be ZERO.

So yk. Decide for yourself whether that's a charity you want to give money to.

I am Amira, the breadwinner for my family after my father's death. We were forced to flee to the southern part of Gaza after the war intensified. Our home, my university, and my workplace were bombed😢.

We are now in desperate need to escape this danger and continue my dream and educational and professional journey💔. I kindly ask you to donate or share the campaign link. Your support can save our lives and give us a chance to live in peace🍉.

Thank you from the bottom of my heart🙏.

Hey folks! Let's have a quick conversation about charity scams, because God love you little peanuts but you are spraying my dash with this "Save Amira/Noor/Abdullah's family/etc" shit these days.

In brief: if you want to help the people of Palestine, give to a legitimate organization, like the UNRWA (as I have). Individual "Palestinians" or "Palestinian families" reaching out to solicit donations are overwhelmingly going to be scams.

"But I reblogged it from someone who said that this fundraiser was verified!" The person saying that is either (1) in on the scam, (2) actively the one running the scam, or (3) painfully naive. "Verified" by who? How? They never say. It's always just some shit like "I've known Amir for 12 years and he's like a brother to me, that's how I know his heart is true." I can say that too. I just made Amir up, but our bond is real and his Facebook profile is 100% legitimate. Please consider his need for €30,000 verified.

I get it, I really do. You want to DO something to alleviate all some of this suffering, and helping an individual or a specific family feels more real than giving to a faceless organization. That's why those "for only one dollar a day, you can feed this specific photogenic child in Africa, who will make you a piece of bespoke macaroni art as a token of his love and gratitude" organizations do so well. Attaching a face to the suffering motivates donors. Reputable charities like Save The Children know that, and so do scammers.

But when you allow scammers to take advantage of your empathy and your desire to help, you are directing money away from the people who need it. You are directing energy away from where it would do some good.

Charity scams have surged since Israel's invasion of Gaza. Some scammers set up entire fake websites pretending to be legitimate relief organizations. Some scammers hack or spoof legitimate Palestinians' e-mail and social media accounts in order to solicit donations. But all of that is a lot more work than putting together a photo collage of some rubble + some attractive Arabic-looking people in what plausibly might be Gaza, setting up a GoFundMe, and copy-pasting the same message to a few hundred or thousand accounts on social media. Like...this is literally the lowest effort scam out there. Social media monitoring tools have tracked a 40% increase in scam-related content since the "All Eyes on Rafah" movement gained momentum.

Some of these Rafah crossing GoFundMes are legitimate. It is deeply unfortunate that there is no easy way to tell them apart from the frauds which vastly outnumber them. For those who are pained by these appeals for aid, and want to give to an individual or a family instead of a reputable relief organization, please consider:

There are more than 800,000 refugees in Rafah at this point.

Egypt only lets a very small number of people through the crossing every day. I've read numbers as low as 150 and as "high" as "a minimum of 500," with 250 being the figure reported most.

Every one of those people needs to pay between $6000 and $15000 to make the list. If you get added to the list but miss your window, due to lack of internet connectivity or, you know, any of a hundred other reasons why the people in Rafah might not be able to check a fucking website right now, you lose your place, lose your money, and have to start the whole process again.

To put it bluntly: every person who pays to make the Rafah crossing is taking one of a horrifyingly small number of slots away from the other 800,000 refugees, and it's not even a guarantee of escape. And the more money that gets funneled into this process, the higher that price will rise, as corrupt and opportunistic travel agencies and Egyptian officials gouge desperate people for as much as they can get.

This is not an effective way of spending your money. Unless it's for your personal family, in which case, yeah, obviously you do everything you can to get these people specifically out of Rafah. But if you just want to "help the Palestinians?" You're not.

Which brings us to Amira here!

Clicking through to Amira's GoFundMe brings you to this little gem, organized by an "Abdallah Alanqar," which features the kind of writing I'm more used to seeing from clickbait retellings of Reddit posts designed to get you to look at ads.

"When sorrow and difficulties strike hard, hope becomes the lone star in the dark sky. This is the story of Amira, a 23-year-old girl who found herself bearing the burden of her family after her father's death three years ago due to the coronavirus."

Am I...am I meant to believe this is her bedroom? Amira's personal bedroom? This is clearly catalogue photography.

"After her father's passing, Amira found herself taking care of her family, consisting of her mother, sister Noor, and brother Abdulrahman. Her mother, suffering from high blood pressure and diabetes, faces health problems that further complicate their situation. But courage and determination drive Amira forward."

Good, great, well-lit stock footage of rubble, gotta have some of that. The same photo collage is also used in this GoFundMe for "Mohammed Alanqer," also run by "Abdallah Alanqar." That one's a little better, Abdallah clearly at least raided someone's actual Facebook page for family photos. Amira's here has no photos of her at all, and just one selfie on her Tumblr.

Mohammed also has a Tumblr! The pinned post starts with: "Hello, my name is Mohammed Alanqar, and I am from Gaza Palestine 🇵🇸. I write to you today with a heavy heart💔, seeking hope and help. The ongoing conflict has put my family's life in grave danger🙏." Weird how this ostensibly 36 year old man writes exactly like our 23 year old Amira.

Also, if you go to Mohammed's Instagram, it's 100% interior design photos from either AI or magazines - you know, the kind of stuff you usually see on fake Instagram accounts - until July 12th, at which point it suddenly switches to tons and tons of photos of this one Arabic family. I hope they're alive, whoever they are.

It goes without saying that if you Google any of the names of the people mentioned in these GoFundMes, the only thing that comes up is the GoFundMe and the promotional social media surrounding the GoFundMe. That's weird, right? Mohammed ostensibly had a start-up (not that we're told what it was called). Amira was a student. You'd expect that Googling their names would turn up something.

Anyway, back to Amira.

"Amira worked as a teaching assistant at the university while pursuing a master's degree in data science, and also worked as a programmer in a company. Her life was going smoothly until war came and destroyed everything."

Just "the university" and "a company." No details, nothing that would let us actually look up if Amira exists or not. (They also include more stock footage of rubble here, I'll spare you.)

"Her university, workplace, and home were completely destroyed, forcing them to flee south in search of a safe haven. Now, Amira and her family live in tents for displaced people in Deir al-Balah, where they suffer from water shortages and the spread of diseases, posing an additional challenge, especially for her immunocompromised mother."

Note that they don't say fled south from where. I'm not sure about the relevance of the photos here; is this supposed to be depicting the dirty, abysmal conditions in Deir al-Balah? Because this is just what outdoor cooking looks like. I had an identical meal in the backyard of a Lebanese family I knew growing up. This looks like a nice day. The close crops + blurred edges on these photos are there to make it harder to find the original images sources, btw.

Blah blah blah, you get the picture. This is nothing. Amira doesn't exist.

"But her post says she was vetted!"

Sure enough, her pinned post does feature this:

I don't know any of these people offhand and wouldn't blindly trust them with my money, so let's dig a little deeper, shall we?

Nabulsi's post is not "vetting." It is an uncritical reposting of the information (and images...) in Amira's GoFundMe, without any additional comment or context.

Fairuzfan's post is just a wordless reblog of - oh, what's this? A post by "Ameera Alanqar," as in, our OP? Just a different blog run by our good friend Amira here? And all of the posts on that blog are about Amira and Mohammed, and how much of your money they need?

Sar-soor's post is just a wordless reblog of Nabulsi's post. Again, no context or further information provided.

Aaand 90s-ghost's post is just a wordless reblog of the same post, again, reblogged from @amira-alanqar, a blog which has now been deleted. Add it to the list with @amira-world and @ameera-anq.

I found another deleted blog called @palestinian-fundraising which put a big "VERIFIED AS REAL" stamp in red across the bottom of these posts, with a link that just goes back to...Nabulsi's reblog. None of this is vetting. None of this is anything.

I know you're upset. I know you just want to help! I know you want to do anything, even if it's small, even if it's just reblogging the words of some desperate young woman or family man in the hopes that it gets them a tiny bit closer to safety and peace. But you are accomplishing nothing but putting money into the pockets of scammers. Amira's GoFundMe has raised €17,826. "Mohammed's" GoFundMe has raised €48,958.

Stop. Stop. Stop. Stop. Stop.

[kendrixtermina]

It's not your "4 fix" that makes people think you're a infp. It's your obvious inferior Te. People like midlink have told you a thousand times: high Ti users break down their thought process instead of sending a long walk of text with difficult and over researched words. A intp wouldn't need a "long list with points and examples with less vague definitions" because that's Te, a Ti Dom is not as sure about their type as you're so stubborn with yours. You don't explain yourself like a intp.

Ah you’re one of their cronies. as I suspected. 

One group of raid-loving associates is hardly “people”. Calm your Fe tits and get perspective. . 

I shall not be wasting further time on this nor repeating the same arguments I made weeks ago, other than the tl; dr is that you’re shoehorning my words into your conceptions of the definitions with a generous helping of word-twisting and presumption. 

An amusing example for casual readers:

Me: “Be precise and specific. Give me reason to give your random claim attention and consideration.” ( that is, Don’t use a vague  that could be applied to anything)

They: You asked for said you needed “less vague” definitions [as in easier to understand] hence inf Te. 

It’s like those ppl who argue their fav character is an INFJ  and blame all the obvious, copious and constant displays of sensing on “inferior Se”. never mind that an inferior function would generally be used mostly when triggered rather than being the person’s default aproach.

I mean take a step back and look at this.  Do they realize that they’ve just basically claiming that using, referencing or researching technical jargon is something an INTP would never do? I don’t think they meant to do that  because it’s opposite of like what any source ever tell you about INTPs when you first ask what they are. Stereotypes don’t apply to everyone but the love of nerd jargon and researching new topics seems to be widespread. 

Rather this is insofar as I can tell a honest mistake due to using bad definitions. 

Good example for these “One trick pony, simplistic” conception of the functions a la “Si is memory” or “Ni is planning” that creates so much confusion, in their case “all referencing is Te”. In truth one behavior can be done by various processes in various ways. 

Since neither of us invented mbti and we wish to talk about mbti and not some thing we’ve made up from scratch on our own, we would have to read up on sources in order to talk about this mbti thing and use jargon in order to discuss the topic with precision and familiarize ourselves with the concept.

Since no human can invent the wealth of modern science themselves we ALL have to reference at some point. That’s no more a particular function than memory rather function influences how we reference. I daresay a lot of referenciing is also Ne but that would be a more associative sort. 

With the T functions its more about connections - the difference is more that Te takes the data as it is as basic “building blocks” which it then build into methods, procedures and applications, whereas Ti tries to understand what the source “means” that is recreate a model of the concept and its logical interconnections in their head. They won’’t just go and use the fact right away until they have analyzed it for themselves, but they may well think “this is an useful concept!” and adopt it, making additions or changes for themselves or synthezising their own understanding from multiple sources depending on what convinces them whereas the Te user adopts an alghorithm/procedure based on how well it gets results. 

Accepting info after checking it isn’t the same as just “swallowing” it. There’s a difference between citing a source as an appeal to authority or doing it so the other person knows which imput you used, which parts of the thinking are yours and to go and form their own conclusions. Obviously I would not reference concepts that did not convince me but the decision wether to be convinced or not is made via how the concept mashes with previous understanding and wether it makes logical sense not because I have seen its results and widely found useful by ppl in general (Te) - indeed a lot of this advanced in depht socianics stuff isn’t known or used by many people but I use it because I have found it makes sense and makes good distinctions.barring future changes of opinion of course.

Indeed knowledge only through results but not and unless there’s very good proof I tend to disbelieve or be sceptical of claims of casual relation if there is no mechanistical explanation of HOW thing A can possibly affect thing B. For better or for worse. Sometimes it turns out the local INTJ was right and a problem really ~was~ the laundry detergent’s fault even if I did not know how. . 

But in either case the person will talk of square roots when they encounter a square root or a problem that square roots  are relevant and refer to the word “square root”. Not everyone who ever did this is a FP or TJ. The difference is more in the focus understanding: TE: “You get a square root by multiplying a number with itself.” Ti: “A square root is a number’s multiple of itself.” - hence why socionics calls it procedural logic or alghorithms (”This is how you do it.” where the answer is a method) vs. structural logic or laws. (”What is it?” where the answer is a cathegory in the TPs’ sorting system)

Te is not just repeating phrases. TJs and FPs do not just repeat stuff - they know, to varying degrees, when and how to use what depending on what they encounter and criticize/ find fault in such methods. (Indeed in my experience the types who do the most “unsynthesized repeating of statements” are usually Ti inferiors who often compensate with a very Fe ish, “A said X statement but B said Y so I am asking a third person consensus decision process and they seem to have a hard time extracting extra information from a statement by deduction.)

What Jung meant by “objective” or “Subjective” in his original definition of the functions - which I’ve studied -  is not the colloquial sense of the words (that extroverted functions only copy and that introverted ones make every) but wether “the attention begins with the subject” or “the object.”

That means ddoes the thought start with the person, or with what they are seeing? 

Te, Ne, Fe, and Se will pay attention to the stimulus because it’s there wether it’s reacting to a feeling, awknowledging a fact, reacting to a sensation, noticing an association etc. with Fi, Ti, Si and Ni the process begins from the inside - how does the stimulus relate to the subject and their own feelings/beliefs/archetypes/past sensations? Hence why Te pays attention to things that are ‘relevant’ whereas Ti follows what the person is interested in & may not show much interest in what is deemed “relevant” by broad society hence the math geek who knows nothing about movie stars etc. 

And once you understand that it is way more probable that I have Ti insofar as I can discern I match those patterns very well. 

IDK who OP is surely can’t type them from just this paragraph but I recall that a lot of ppl of the group from the 2 weeks back poster were ENTPs so for a moment I’ll work off the asumption that you are one it would make a lot of sense if you were even if its not the only option. 

This is where the fine distinctions of socionics concepts are useful particularly in how they describe the difference between different function slots such as auxillary and as well as Victor Gulenko’s “Cognitive styles” (I am almost certainly holographic-panoramic so assuming that I was indeed mistaken and was a Fi user all along, I’d be an ENFP if anything.

It may come down to a difference between ENTP and INTP.

But to make iot short and cut to the basics the idea  - which at least to me seemed consistent with all my observations - is that the auxxilary or “creative” function is used to “create” new thoughts at the behest of the base/program/dominant function when the dom function switches it on. in any case the dominant function is what makes the primary decisions that is basic in any variant of jungian typology. 

Hence why an ENTP can defend a wolly foreign belief system on the fly in a debate, change opinion over night and reinterpret all past data to that end etc. but that is specific of auxillary Ti not all Ti. In an ENTP your auxillary spits out ever new all new such logically consistent frameworks at the whim of your dominant Ne. 

So Ne doms change their opinions very fast and are often constantly wondering if they’re mistyped - even when they know that this is common for Ne doms they still could be wrong and as Ne doms they primarily see the world as “coulds”. Since they have little Si they are not likely to give past experiences much weight and take longer to “retain” tendencies anyways so their opinions are not particularly inert especially if their gut fix is not nine. 

I mean think of it: Ti is an introverted function. It uses an internal framework to make decisions which it constantly mantains. New problems are either quickly decided based on past categories or require a slow introverted process of reorganization.  In an INTP, Ti is in charge and flips Ne on when needed.  Dom Ti fits everything into one big central framework which is the main organising principle of the person’s mind. 

When new data or queries are encountered the ENTP would first go to Ne and look at the possibility, examine it in its own right, and then later create or look for a logical framework that fits it. The INTP would go to Ti first, that is, try to fit it into that big preexisting net work. And only if it does not fit will it be reorganized, “Oh, I was wrong, so what else could it be? * activates Ne” 

 First time someone presents you with a possibility you will examine it but you won’t reexamine something from the ground up if you already “know” the terrain and have a strong detailed framework that explains why the person may think that even though you don’t think it’s true. You’re still open to changing your mind but a threshold of unaccounted data must be crossed before reevaluation will happen. That is how dominant  introverts work. It’s not stubborness its not reinventing the wheel twice. 

Its not uncommon for INTPs in particular to “miss” data that does not fit their framework at times and need some time to change entrenched beliefs. And again that’s not just me saying it that’s very common info with a simple cause: the way in which dominant Ti tries to fit everything in a preexisting framework first and then maybe changes. Really not making any wild controversial claims here. Also we have more Si than ENTPs making the ideas more inert for better or for worse. 

To summarize: 

Dominant Ti doesn’t change at the drop of a hat like aux Ti especially in conjunction with tert si

Citing sources is basic rhetoric not Te the difference is in HOW the sources are used

The difference is in focus on the object vs begin of thinking inside the subject

in the end there’s only so much sense in discussing my thinking with a stranger who isn’t a telepath. I know my head but how would i prove that to you? 

(See the common apologist spiel about”All nonbelievers secretly believe.” Me: *feels no belief* actually no. - but how to I prove to someone what is or isn’t in my head, especially if their worldview doesn’t even allow for the possibility? Same with being in denial. How do you prove youre not in denial? especially when both no denial and denial can produce the answer “No im not?”.  )

Person A: You talk only about yourself!

Person B: No I do not`?

Person A: You’re doing it again! ... but you can’t answer a quetion anout yourself without mentioning yourself. Its the other person who mentioned you in the first place. So IDK if anything will even come of this except another hour of my life going out the window. 

[tellywoodtrash]

ishqbaaz lbs: 4th + 5th may

suchhhh bad acting by the qaidis. lord, why can’t this show get better extras? 😐😐😐

pft. shivaay singh oberoi just DANCED around drunk on magic berries with a bigger gun than that. try harder, qaidis. 🙄🙄🙄

lmao, shuru ho gayi apni madam. 😋😋😋

HAHAHAHA AMAR PREM 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

“naam sunte hai pata chala tha tum filmy aur awaara kism ke ladke ho, but no! tum toh nikkame aur nithalle bhi ho.” 😂😂😂

lol shivaay’s reaction to her ENERGY. 😂😂😂

OMG JUST WHEN I THINK I CAN’T LOVE ANIKA MORE, SHE QUOTES ANDAZ APNA APNA. FUCK ME SIDEWAYS, I WOULD DIE FOR THIS GIRL. I WOULD. MOVE OVER SHIVAAY. NO ONE CAN LOVE HER MORE THAN ME. 😭😭😭

this is exaaaaaaaaactly how i react when ppl tell me they haven’t seen andaz apna apna. 😧😧😧

jesus i feel like gul & co. are stalking me. *looks around suspiciously*

these qaidis need to get a grip with the bad acting. 😕😕😕

shivaay is so undeserving of my queen. can she leave his unappreciative ass and marry me? ours shall be a happy, andaz apna apna quote filled union. 👭🏽👭🏽👭🏽

why are the qaidis holding hands? are they lovers, ‘i love you philip morris’ style? 🤔🤔🤔

also i swear i’ve seen the moochi waala qaidi somewhere before. 😐😐😐

lmaooooooooo shivaay’s faceeee when she keeps talking. 😂😂😂

lol, the moochi waala qaidi is thissss close to losing it. i guess you need to be exposed to anika for a really long time to build up resistence the way shivaay has. 😋😋😋

whattttt kinda stupidass police doesn’t know what the faraar qaidi look like? 😒😒😒

i really think the qaidi are lovers. look how affectionately that one is sehlaofying the other one’s knee. 😙😙😙

who died and made anika the leading expert on tyres? 🙄🙄🙄

lol, sach mein aaj bohut bakbak kar rahi hai. i think she MIGHT still be high on berry juice. 😂😂😂

lo. aur police. 😐😐😐

finally. someone knows what INDIA’S LEADING BUSINESSMAN looks like. 😒😒😒

BIWI BIWI BIWI BIWI. man is unstoppable. i think he’s just glad someone’s married to his annoying ass.  😂😂😂

aaaaaaaaand moochi waala qaidi’s lost his temper finally. 😝😝😝

OUFF, SHIVAAY. YOU’RE THE BIGGEST IDIOT. I THINK THIS IS PROOF HE’S A BONAFIDE OBEROI, COZ SUCH DUMBASSERY IS 100% OBEROI GENES. 😑😑😑 

lol anika talking about her hair routine featuring mehendi reminds me of the scene where she offers omkaara shikakai and reetha waala shampoo as thanks for clearing her name of the chip waala accusation. 😂😂😂

why the fuck hasn’t shivaay noticed that the policeman is out cold???? 😒😒😒

CODEWORD BHI NAHI SMAJHTA, BEWAKOOF!!!!!!!!!!!!! 😤😤😤

“lagta hai bhabiji ko antakshari khelni hai.” lmao 😂😂😂

haha shivaay’s fake laugh. 😂😂😂

oh god, please don’t make HIM sing. 🙉🙉🙉

HAHAHAHAHAHAHA OMG SHIVAAY’S GETTING MAD THAT ANIKA’S SINGING DURING HIS TURN. 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

shivaay singh oberoi, antakshari enthusiast. who knew. 😇😇😇

… i’m so surprised shivaay even knows how to play antakshari. it’s such a LS game as far as he’s concerned. 🤔🤔🤔

LMAO LOOK AT HIM ENJOYING ‘GOLI MAAR BHEJEEEE MEIN’ AS IF IT’S SOME CLASSICAL RAAG 😂😂😂😂

oh godddddddddddddd now he’s even singing along to oye oye. this fucking idiot. 😂😂😂

FUCKINGGGGGG FINALLLLLLLLLYYYYYYY! 

LOL WHY IS HE STILLL SINGINGGGG ALONNNNNGGG???? 😂😂😂

could youuuuu people run a little FURTHER, and not just stop at the first thing you found???????? idiots. 😒😒

“tum theek ho?” awwww 😭😭😭😭

lmaooo “haan par US WAQT ka code word tha na!” pffffffft. typical husband wala excuse. 🙄🙄🙄

“TOH ACHCHI QUALITY KA BRAIN KHAREEDNA CHAHIYE THA NA!!!!!” HAHAHAHAHAHAHA 😂😂😂😂😂

he doesn’t know what oootpataang means??? it’s a normal word though?? 😐😐😐

I TOLD YOU FUCKERS TO RUN FURTHERRRRRRRRRRR 😩😩😩

qaidis are taking full opportunity to fucking ACT the fuck out of the 3 minutes given to them. 😒😒😒

shivaay, you know she’s not gonna leave your stupid ass, as much as you deserve it. it’s her one fatal flaw. 😑😑😑

pffffffft, so only you can talk crap about how much she talks eh? 🙄🙄🙄

lmaooooooo anika and her thermocol ka stone. 😂😂😂

qaidi 2 ki actingggggggg. amazing. 

headcanon: patidev was finding anika all types of sexy and advancing to kiss the crap outta her when that stupid qaidi interrupted. 😠😠😠

is this the time to pick a fight, shivaay? kissss her! 😚😚😚

i feel like my liveblogs these days should just be a bullet point after bullet point screaming “kiss her!!!!!!!!!!!” and nothing more. 😐😐😐

please, is that why you stood in front of a gun, ready to take a bullet with her name on it FOR THE SECOND FUCKING TIME???? 🙄🙄🙄

this is an equal opportunity bullet-taking relationship, asshole. you better accept that and get used to it, mister. 😑😑😑

LMAOOOOOOOOOOO THEM SCREAMING SHUT UP AT THE QAIDI. AND HIM ACTUALLY PUTTING HIS FINGER ON HIS LIPS. 😂😂😂😂

she’s right. it is yourrrrr fault, shivaay. your nosy NKK enquiring ass is to fault! 😒😒😒

“haddi-tod bhi” LMAOOOOOOOOOOOO 😂😂😂

I SWEAR TO GOD IF THIS KANJI EYED MOTHERFUCKER GETS HIMSELF SHOT AGAIN, IMMA RESURRECT HIS DEAD ASS AND KILL HIM ALL OVER AGAIN MYSELF. AND IT’LL BE PAINFUL AND FUCKING SLOW. FUCKING HELL. 😡😡😡

5th may

lmaoooooo wait, they’re really named AMAR PREM? hahahahahaha 😂😂😂

shivaay’s sideeye at the qaidis while watching them argue. 😂😂😂

“mere koooo kyunnn maaara????” - said in the same voice and tone as “tere ko kisneee maaara????????” from gunda 😂😂😂

anika’s turn to stand in front now. #feminism 💁🏽💁🏽💁🏽

oh mooch wale qaidi. that was a mistake. you made SSO angry. you won’t like him when he’s angry. 😬😬😬

“BIIIIIIIIIIWIIIIII HAI MERIIIIIIIIIII! DO YOU KNOW HOW MANY GIRLS RAN OUT ON MY ASS ON MY WEDDING DAY???? YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT WAS TO GET HER TO MARRY ME? AND TO KEEP HER MARRIED TO ME ON A DAILY BASIS? IT’S FUCKING HARD. DON’T YOU FUCKING BE SHOOTING AT THE ONLY WOMAN ON GOD’S GREEN EARTH WHO CAN TOLERATE ME!!!!!!!!”

lol nakuul having to stand on his tippy toes to match the qaidi’s height. 😂😂😂

why’s he pointing the gun towards himself tho? such a fucking idiot. 😒😒😒

pfffffffffft, i already know the qaidi’s the one who’s getting shot. awaaiiiii ka drama. 🙄🙄🙄

looks like policeman finallly fucking woke up from his mini coma. 😐😐😐

also, god, so overdramatic, mooch waale qaidi. bas haath pe hi toh laga hai. that’s like a rudra level graaaaaaze. ask these two how a gunshot to the fucking chest feels. 😒😒😒

yaaaaaaaaaaas, you hug the crap outta your husband girl. 😊😊😊

and since he’s not taking the initiative, maybe YOU kiss him. it’s 2017, girls can do that now. 🙆🏽🙆🏽🙆🏽

coz she loves your dumb ass, you dumbass. 😒😒😒

ouff. you two. less fighting. more makeout-ing. 🙄🙄🙄

oh ho, ghoom phir ke back to NKK. 😑😑😑

btw, is this all happening in front of the chor-police? like… you two should maybe take this behind that wall. 😕😕😕

aw. he’s trying. 😭😭😭

i know he is, but… come on man, you’re a grownass adult. you gotta learn how to control your impulses. you can’t just do whatever the fuck you “want”. i WANT to quit my job and just stay in bed, braless all day. i WANT to never eat another healthy meal again and just subsist on potato chips and popcorn for the rest of my life. can i do that? NO. COZ THAT’S WHAT BEING A GODDAMN ADULT IS ABOUT. YOU CONTROL YOUR IMPULSES AND DO THE RIGHT THING. 😒😒😒

aaaah, finally she said it. 😭😭😭

YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAS. 🙌🏽🙌🏽🙌🏽

also, crying. my boy’s grown up. he’s SO grown up. waaaaaah. 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

amazing what some rottenass alcoholic berries and having a gun pointed in your face can do! they’ve given this man the self awareness he’s been lacking for 33 fucking years. 😐😐😐

ok, did he stay up all night reading some relationship therapy book or what? he’s talking classic counselling language. 🤔🤔🤔

waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhh, they love each other sooooo muchhhhhhhhhh. and iiiiiiiii love them soooooooo muchhhhhhhhhhh. 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

COULD YOU FUCKERS AT LEAST FUCKING KISS NOW?!!? 😩😩😩

GODDAMNIT POLICE OFFICER!!!!!!!!!!!! THEY WERE GONNA KISS! THEY ALREADY HAVE A BROTHER WHO DOES GHATIYA INOPPORTUNATELY TIMED SHAYARI BACK HOME. NO ONE WANTS TO LISTEN TO YOUR STUPIDASS FUCKING SHER. 😡😡😡

also, where did the second policeman come from?? 

GO HOME AND SEXXXXXXXX NOW!!!!!!!!!!! 👉🏽👌🏽👉🏽👌🏽👉🏽👌🏽

walk, you spoilt braaaatttt! 🙄🙄🙄

CHAMPA!!!!!!!!! 😇😇😇

lmaooooo anika’s wonderstruck look at her ownnnn hands. such fucking cute. i love her so much. 💖💖💖💖💖💖

lmaoooooo “zindagi bharrrr yeh sunna hoga” suchhhhh a typical husband. 😂😂😂

lol tumhare paas jet THAAA. it crashed, remember? 😋😋😋

LMAO SHE’S SOOOOO ME. SUCHHHH A PATRONIZING SMUGASS BITCHHHHHH. 😂😂😂

awwww look how nervous he is. 😊😊😊

HELLO CHAMPU! 😂😂😂 

she just SHOVED him offffff lmaooooo 😂😂😂😂

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAH HE’S COVERING HIS FACE!!!!!!!!! 😂😂😂

“dono” haha awwwwwwwwww 😙😙😙

“is baare mein kisi ko bataana mat.” 

omgggggggg this adorable fuckerrrrr. 💘💘💘💘

“pair theek se aa rahe hai?“ 

kyun nahi aayenge? utniiiii height toh hai nahi iski. 😋😋😋

lollllllllllllllllllll he doesn’t know what to do with his handsssssssss. 😂😂😂

why the random flashbacks to the #shitia party? 🤔🤔🤔

ouffffff, back to this hellhole. can’t my babies just stayyyyy in the foresttttttttt? 😫😫😫

lmaoooooooo look at him saunter in coooooolllly in the bg. 😆😆😆

UGH. CALM DOWN MUMMEH. HE’S BACK NOW. 🙄🙄🙄

and fuck your passive aggressiveness. 😑😑😑

shivaay’s silent but slightly annoyed “I’M A GROWNASS ADULT” face is my permanant face at my mom. 😐😐😐

mummeh doesn’t appreciate being dismissed like that. 😬😬😬

nor does she appreciate him being a GOOD FUCKING HUSBAND. THERE IS NOTHING I FUCKING HATE MORE THAN THIS DESI CONCEPT OF “JORU KA GHULAM”. IT’S CALLED BEING A CONSIDERATE, LOVING HUSBAND. MAJAAAAAL HAI KI THE PATRIARCHY LET A MAN BE DEMONSTRABLY AFFECTIONATE AND CARING TOWARDS HIS GODDAMN WIFE. 👿👿👿👿

i’ve said it once, i’ll say it again: fuck you very much pinky. please die, thanks. 👹👹👹☠☠☠

god what nonsense. looks like gauri’s bullshit #pativrataness is spreading via air to anika. ugh. LET HIM TOUCH YOUR GODDAMN FEET IF THAT’S WHAT HE WANTS. 😒😒

goddddddd pinkyyyyyyyyyy, LEAVE THEM ALONE!!!!!!!! BHOOT KE TARAH MANDARAAA RAHI HAI HAMESHA. 😑😑😑

and he said he doesn’t wanna do the damn pooja. DROP IT, MUMMEH! 😠😠😠

yeah, whatever. good luck trying. now leave. 🙄🙄🙄

“khud ko change karne ki koshish kar raha hoon. mere liye tumhara naam khoon khaandaan TUMSE IMPORTANT NAHI HAI.“ 

excuse me. it’s raining on my face. 😭😭😭

… ”HUMAAAAAAARE LIYE”. SAY IT! SAY IT! 🙃🙃🙃

HAAAAAAAA, HE SAID IT!!!!!!!!!!!!! 😂😂😂

“ek dusre ke liye goli khaa sakte hai… toh mom ki gaali khaa hi sakte hai.“ 

lol idk about you shivaay, but i’d rather khaaofy goli rather than mom ki gaali, coz desi moms and their daant is waaaay more emotionally traumatic. 😫😫😫

also, waaaaaaaaaaaaah, i loveeeee himmmmmmmmmm. 😭😭😭

OH SHIT OH SHIT OH SHIT MAHI VE CONFIRMED TO BE SHIVAAY KA BHAI 😱😱😱

today’s lb will be put up like… waaaaaay later. :) 

[moidse]

Okay so, I feel bad like I’m withholding information... I have a lot of insecurities about non-monogamy/poly and I’ve never explained this to you.  I just keep noticing a reoccurring anxiety is what if I just can’t do non-monogamy and the negative thoughts and anxieties never fade away? How long am I willing to feel uncomfortable about this? What is my own limit for trying to see if this will work? 

[[I have a history of not stating my own boundaries, wants, and needs, in a relationship out of fear of the other person realizing we aren’t compatible and leaving me. I would rather endure a relationship I only kinda am into then be single. I hate the idea of being single. Which is also why i never break up with the other person. 

I feel like I date people to prove something to myself... although with the person im with now I think it’s the least like that, I genuinely believe they are a mostly healthy influence, aside from the heavy drinking, in my life. (wait, i kind of am with them to prove i’m not just a fukboi, and also in the beginning i was really trying because i don’t o*** for them and i felt bitter at the idea of this not working out and i dropped my fuk buddy 4 this... but i have ended up catching feelings for them..) Like, it’s been so long I can admit I only was with o**** because I was insecure that with the fact that I hadn’t been in a relationship since I was 18. I felt very ashamed that I had only 1 relationship and it was toxic and that was the only person I had had sex with and been in a romantic relationship with. I felt like that in itself was evidence that I am not worthy of love and am hard to love and will be alone forever. That’s definitely a big part as to why I rushed into dating O***. I desperately wanted to be able to say I’ve had a recent relationship. I felt so ashamed to say yeah my last relationship was 5 years ago. I felt like that was evidence that I am not easy to date, i have always carried that knowledge as though it were proof that I’m broken and you probably shouldn’t even try dating me... when it doesn’t necessarily mean that. I live in a smaller city for 1. And I do believe I needed to work on myself to a degree but I’m not broken and unlovable and at a point of no return. Also that person really messed up my self-esteem so I wasn’t ready to date again for a while and that is okay and normal after your first break up. I just have always felt like I should be experiencing more in my love life at the age that I am--- and tbh says who? the colonizer heteronormative agenda? Cuz we all know queer ppl come out at different times and our timelines aren’t the same for what is considered normal... ]]

tbh I have had a history of jealousy and just issues with non-monogamy/poly since I started dating. So, my first relationship that was really bad and emotionally abusive,,, they later admitted to me that they were trying to be extra mean to me near the end to get me to break up with them and part of that extra mean routine was them asking if we could be poly and have the relationship be open... they later admitted to me and said they honestly only suggested that because they thought it would push me to end it... but i didn’t.... there was nothing they could do or say to get me to break up with them... i was already enduring emotional abuse.. I just was naive and set on the idea that we were gonna be together forever no matter what.... anyways, that first relationship started my first issues with being poly.. i was desperately convinced for so many years that I would end up back with this abusive person... we used to talk about trying it again... we were lowkey on and off for years... whenever they’d come back to dayton I would sleep with them and desperately wish and hope they’d take me back/even wanted me back... while they were poly and the main issue and excuse as to why we couldn’t be together was that I had issues with them being poly and so if i could just change and be more open minded then we could be together forever which is what my naive brain wanted more than anything.... during those years we were off and on i would creep on their social media and see all the different ppl they dated over the like 4-5 years i was still chasing them hoping we’d be back together... i would compare myself to the other people they were dating and just feel like they were my enemy... they were the reason why this person wasn’t in love with me and back with me... (which obviously now i can see none of this was true, but i was mentally and emotionally stuck on this person from ages like 18 until like now....I still very much so carry a lot of these mentalities) but I just had a very unhealthy POV of the other ppl they were with.. I directed my frustrations towards them when really that person just didn’t love me and i don’t believe they ever did love me... anyways... Ugh I also remember when I would hang with them whenever they’d talk about who ever their partner was at the time it would make me feel so insecure and ruin my fantasy that they were interested in me still or wanted me back... omg typing all of this out.. i can’t believe i did this for years... this is so sad.... I also remember further hating myself when comparing myself to the fact that they had dated countless ppl after me, they basically left me cuz they were into some trans dude, and seeing them on social media go through partner after partner i would constantly compare myself to them and think, how come they’ve had so many partners since we broke up and i’ve literally had none... this was something that ate away at me for years, this was evidence that i suck, im the problem, im not lovable... and it’s def why i was eager to jump into a relationship last year because it was the first time there had been mutual interest in dating since i was 18 and i was 23 and felt so ashamed that i hadn’t even come close to dating anyone since my first relationship....

Then that person I dated was poly too and I wasn’t very honest with them and acted like I was cool with it and then once they said they were going on a date with someone it was clear i was having anxiety panics about it and wasn’t okay with it... I did not do a good job at communicating why I wasn’t okay with it though. That whole relationship had poor communication... 

It’s like I understand on paper how non-monogamy makes sense. I understand that people can be in love with multiple people at the same time. But it’s like my emotions, anxieties, and insecurities don’t understand... 

I also just am worried like what if I’m just not good at non-monogamy? it’s not like I just naturally one day was like.. ya know what monogamy is stupid and I prefer non-monogamy! ... It was more like, I feel broken and hard to love and like I’m not good enough for anyone... and every single person i have a crush on is non-monogamous ... so .. i guess i’m non-monogam-ish ...cuz i don’t want to be alone... i guess it’s just like I feel so hard to love i wanna prove to myself I can be in a healthy relationship... which I believe I can and I deserve one... I just do not know if non-monogamy is what a healthy relationship for me looks like. I don’t want to be non-monogamist because I don’t want to be alone... that’s just sad.... 

[[I just have no interest in dating anyone else rn and I think it’s hard for me to understand that you do. I think that’s a big thing.  But like, if i was in your shoes and someone i was friends with, like if my one hot friend said they have a crush on me i would be like hell yea let’s see if this can work... it’s like i know if i were in your shoes I would do the same... ]]

it just sucks, my brain will not stop suggesting that you dating someone else means i’m not good enough. 

Anytime I even think about the fact you are dating someone else it gives me a lot of anxiety and i quickly try to think about something else and it’s just like... ugh that’s not a good feeling. I get so triggered and feel like i’m lesser than. 

I know these thoughts and feelings are just based off my past experiences... but I just have this fear of like what if I’m just not non-monogamous... l’ve never dated someone that was monogamous and I hate the idea that I’m just choosing this to please the other person because that is what i am doing right now at least... 

[[I feel like when I move to a bigger city being non-monogamous would make more since to me maybe... idk .. i haven’t had many relationships... i’ve never been dating someone and wanted to be with someone else... i feel like i can be very comfortable with just 1 person and i don’t need more... but i understand the idea of something falling into your lap and wanting to explore it... ]]

I think I could be non-monogamous, we just need to talk about so much more and I always feel anxious thinking about you dating someone else because I have not shared with you my past consistent issues with non-monogamy and i’m not sure how you’ll react...

From my last email you acknowledged you assumed I was fine with non-monogamy and you should’ve opened up a conversation-- and i agree i wish that would’ve happened-- and i guess this is me trying to open up this conversation because this stresses me out most days and I need this conversation to be open.. I just feel so insecure and my anxiety is awful and i feel like everyone knows im insecure about this and it’s fucking with me