#if you know me well enough te be allowed to see my in my pjs

[thetablestspoon]

I love pyjamas, because even if they get worn down or permanently stained or have a hole somewhere you can still wear it because fuck you that's my pyjamas and why are you even bothering me when I'm still in my pyjamas

[be-ready-when-i-say-go]

A Family of Five- Part 3: Sick Day

Calum and Harlowe’s marriage hasn’t always been easy, but it has always been filled with love. This is a collaborative experience with In Sorrow and In Joy. Dad!Calum. Black OC.

CW: Over the course of this series, there are mentions of pregnancy, therapy, and postpartum depression. There is also 18+ Content (Smut)

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The house is finally silent. Koha’s no longer shouting about needing his lunchbox, Harlowe’s not clicking against the tile floor with her heels, Pepper, Sissy and Jack their three dogs have been taken out, sprawled out across their favorite spots in the living room Jack and Sissy are the latest additions. Jack a german shepherd mix and Sissy is a Cocker Spaniel Corgi mix. They were a two for one deal, only in the sense that the pound warned them that the two had become extremely attached to each other. So much so that they could not go to separate foster homes. 

Calum can only blame himself for the dog additions. Koha had Pepper and they grew up together. So of course, Calum wanted Esha to grow up with a dog. So they went looking at the same local shelter from where they got Pepper from. That’s how they ran across Jack and Sissy. Esha was stoked to have a dog she could cuddle with. This of course meant that him and Harlowe were outnumbered, though the dogs did help when one of the kids is hurt in another room. They could run and get the attention of Calum or Harlowe to come to the rescue. Of course, the crying also indicated that. But the dogs loved the kids and they best was naptime when they Pepper lays down first, Koha and Esha curled up near each other and Jack and Sissy outlining them. Calum has too many photos of the same scene from multiple different times they curled up together. 

Esha whines a little from the couch; Calum walks over, running his palm over her forehead. Normally, she would be off to daycare. However, she had a fever last night and it hadn’t broken yet either. Calum usually drops Esha off, every morning at the same time, with the same kisses, pressed into both cheeks and a big hug. Harlowe’s job and Koha’s private school are in the same direction. Esha’s daycare is a bit of an offshoot, which Harlowe could easily do.  However, Esha prefers Calum to drive her. Calum loves it too, her dancing in her carseat, her singing along to the radio. His little baby girl always excited to show him something new that she learned. It’s time for just them. 

Though the house wasn’t too chaotic, Calum did feel like he was constantly running around. He was constantly moving, more things added to this To-Do List and never enough time just to enjoy the moment. The moments he has with Esha though on the fifteen minute drive are what keeps him going some days. He loves Harlowe, Koha, and the dogs. But there’s nothing quite like seeing Esha smile, even as he’s dropping her off in front of her preschool There’s the way her tiny hand takes his, and the way she grins, waving at all her friends still close to his side that makes all that chaos still; Calum feels at peace.

Right now though, his little slice of heaven is sick. Esha stirs from her half sleeping state at the feel of a hand on her face, groaning a little. “How you feeling, baby?” Cal asks softly. 

She shrugs. “Still hurt a little.”

He nods. “Okay, give it some more time before the meds kick in.” Her cup is empty thankfully. She drank all of her water. 

“Okay.”

He tucks the blanket higher up around her, stroking softly over her cheek and bonnet. “I’m sorry you’re sick, baby girl,” he whispers, watching her eyes flutter close. Jack walks over, jumps up onto the couch and settles down at her feet. Pepper keeps watch from the floor with Sissy. Calum scratches over their heads, happy to see them being gentle with her in her present state.

Calum washes the dishes from breakfast, squeezes in a quick work out and after his shower, wakes Esha again. She pushes up away from the pillow, a small ‘hmmph’ falling over her lips. She looks just like Harlowe waking up. The same squint and the matching satin bonnets. “I know, baby, I know. But I have to keep fluids in you.”

Esha takes the cup from her father’s hand, still blinking back sleep from her eyes. There’s no sass, no remark. God, he hates seeing his baby girl like this. Thankfully, she doesn’t get sick often. When she does, it’s like someone has pulled her plug. There’s no power, no life to her almost. She falls back into the cushion, sipping away at her cup. Calum stands, picking her up, before settling into the sofa with Esha in his lap. She snuggles into his chest, though he put her in light pj’s, he can feel the warmth seeping from her body. 

He’s already adjusted the AC some to help her stay cool. “Can we watch Moana?” she mumbles against him. 

“Of course sweetheart. We’ll start if after lunch, okay?”

Esha nods. “Love you, Daddy.”

“Love up too, baby girl.” When she’s fast asleep, yet again, Calum brings the blanket back around her body. He can wait to fix her soup just a tad bit, not wanting to disturb her sleep too much. Softly, he hums a few songs to her sleeping body. 

Calum doesn’t even realize he’s fallen asleep until the feelings of nails against his scalp stir him awake. Harlowe’s smiling down at him. “I came by just to see how see she’s holding up. And I’m come back to both of y’all passed out on the couch,” she chuckles.

Calum sighs. “Hadn’t intended to fall asleep.”

She kisses his forehead. “I’ll fix some soup and then be on my way.”

The sounds of Harlowe’s work around the kitchen sends a shiver down Calum’s spine. He rests his head into the cushions, listening to the soft sounds of metal pots and pans clinking against each other. Esha’s not so warm against him; he’s not sure if it’s just because he’s gotten used to her. Gingerly he places the back of his hand to her forehead. She’s not as warm. Readjusting her, he stands, holding his sick child to his chest. 

They’ll be leaving soon. It’s, of course, going to be tricky with the dogs and the house still here in California. Calum’s tempted to just keep the house since it’s paid for as a vacation home. They can retire here during the school breaks. Maybe they can rent it out through an agency so it’s not just sitting unoccupied all the time. Harlowe’s got a couple uni’s that are interested in her already, which is a good sign because she was worried about finding work. 

Calum watches Harlowe. She’s still in the heels from this morning. It’s a shock she makes this long anymore in the shoes. The heels are a good sign though. Today’s a good day so far. Bad days don’t see heels. Bad days don’t see skirts, or fancy blouses. Calum thinks part of her recovery and stability is linked to going back to work. She can’t help her students if she’s not thinking straight. She can’t enjoy the worlds they’re creating and she can’t help them shape those worlds if all she has is a fog on her shoulder. 

It was hard, before on the maternity leave for Harlowe. It was the same old same old. Day in and day out it was just her bedroom, just the kitchen, and occasionally the outdoors. She didn’t really have a goal, just a muddled sameness marked up rising and fallings of the sun. There was Koha and Esha and Calum for sure. But part of her had taken them for granted, that of course they would be there. She was a mother, she was a wife. These people were in her life for good. 

The thing is, life is fragile and it took realizing that her students wouldn’t be able to see her on campus to know that she couldn’t take anyone or anything for granted. Just because Calum was here now didn’t mean he would have to stick this out. Te Koha had already taken too much of her illness into his soul, she couldn’t crush her own child with her heaviness, with her burden. 

“Don’t you have a class to be teaching?” Cal asks. He remembers now that her schedule shouldn’t allow her to be here. He blames the post nap fog. 

“That was last semester, babe. I redid it so I start teaching at 9, go until 12. Break for lunch for an hour and some change. Then my last class ends goes from 2 to 3:30.”

“That’s right,” he hums, still trying to shake the sleep from him. Harlowe glances over her shoulder a smirk on her face. He knows what she’s thinking. “Don’t say it.”

She holds her hands up in defense. “I wasn’t going to say anything.”

“But you were thinking it. You’re always thinking it.”

“You just love her, that’s all. There’s nothing wrong with that.” Her face says it all though how tightly Esha has Calum wrapped around her tiny finger. It doesn’t matter though. As long as his baby girl knows how much he loves her, it doesn’t matter what Harlowe or anyone else things, or says, or doesn’t say. He’d go through Hell for her, and come back, only to go through it again if he had too. Nothing would stop him from taking care of his daughter. 

Pepper walks over, whining, pointing to the door. “I’ll take her,” Harlowe says, sliding out from in front of the stove. 

As he stirs the soup, Esha starts to wake, groaning. He sets her onto the counter. Calum’s still impressed that he can hold her with one arm. Esha’s getting bigger with every passing second. It scares him a little when he won’t be able to hold her like this anymore. When she’ll be too big and want nothing more than to run through the streets, just as wild as she’s bound to be. She holds onto the blanket, asking, “Chicken noodle soup?”

“Of course. It’s your favorite.”

“Can I have some water?”

Calum hums with a nod, opening the fridge. The back door opens and Esha smiles at up at her mom. “Hi, Momma.”

“Hey, baby. How you feeling?”

“Why you not at school?”

“Came by to see how you’re doing.” Harlowe presses a quick kiss to her forehead. Calum watches them. This is the Harlowe he knew was buried under her fog. This is the Harlowe Koha knew. The new meds seem to be helping. The idea of moving is still scary, but necessary. This place has run its course. Besides, Calum’s worried. New meds always work and then she stops taking them. He can’t do this alone, taking care of two kids, three dogs and his wife. He needs an extra pair of hands to help him out, especially when Harlowe slips. She doesn’t listen to just anybody. Her family’s no help. But Momma Joy has always managed to slip through her guard and keeps her on the right take. 

“Daddy can take care of me,” Esha retorts. 

“You’re definitely feeling better,” Harlowe laughs. “I know Papa Bear can. Momma’s just a worrier, you know.”

“Love you,” she whispers as her mom wraps her up in a hug. 

“Love you too. I’ve got a meeting, so I should probably get back soon.” Harlowe turns to Calum, sliding her hands around his waist. “Want me to pick something up for dinner?”

“I’ll cook. Don’t worry.”

With a nod, she slides away, but not before lightly patting his butt through the sweatpants. “Gross, Momma!” Esha huffs, noting the contact. 

“Do you call Papa Bear out like this?” Harlowe teases, waving as she exits the house. 

“Yes, I do!” the little girl calls to her mother’s back, laughing. These are his two girls, constantly teasing each other. 

Soup finally warmed, Esha sits at the table, taking small spoonfuls to her mouth. Her little legs dangle high above the floor. She crosses her eyes, sucking on a noddle in response to Calum’s face. He laughs, eyes closing, the skin around them crinkling too. Esha beams at the sound; she puffs out her chest a little. The laughter is because of her doing. 

“Do you want to take your hair down?” he asks, after calming from his laugh spell. 

“No.” 

Calum waits until she finishes all the bits of her soup, before they start racing to see who can drink the broth down the fastest. Esha winds up getting more on her pj’s than actually in her stomach. “Look at this mess,” Calum tsks, helping her down at of the chair. “Messy little one, aren’t you?”

“You were beating me. I had to win!”

He nods, waving her towards the stairs, a smile tugging on his lips. “Clearly winning involves dumping half the broth down your shirt.”

“Uh huh, it does.” He cleans her off, sliding her into clean pj’s. She climbs onto the sofa, while Calum cleans the dishes. She’s clutches the DVD cover for Moana, waiting. Calum’s not sure how she hasn’t grown sick of the movie yet. But she watches it with the same eager and awe as the first time she’s laid eyes on it. Calum pulls the plug on the drain, washing his hands off again. 

Esha climbs into his lap right at the start of the movie, she holds a juice pack in her hands, eyes glued to the screen. “You gotta do the singing parts, Daddy,” she states. 

“I know,” he nods, chuckling, “I know.” The singing parts also include the choreography too. During ‘You’re Welcome’, Esha joins her father, dancing around the living room. Both of them know it so well, they barely pay attention to the screen.

When Harlowe returns that afternoon with Koha, she can hear singing before she fully crosses the threshold. Her first guess is Moana, but the further they get into the house, it’s not. It’s Princess and the Frog. Calum’s dancing around during The Shadow Man’s man song. Koha drops his backpack in the foyer, running to join in. Normally, they would try to keep the kids separate if they’re sick. Clearly it is not going to work this time. 

Everyone settles in to finish the rest of the movie before Calum stands to start dinner. Esha watches from the bar counter, also scribbling over copy paper. Koha chats about his day, going over his homework with Harlowe. The house slowly fills with a white noise of sizzling, laughter and paws clicking. 

[cathariis]

‘ i need you.’ — EVERYONE

send  ‘ i need you. ’ for my muse’s reaction.

halcyon & harley (main).

the words that dropped from his lips weren’t a surprise. halcyon had been away on location for the last two months and refused harley to visit her during filming. while the beginning of their relationship is going well, she didn’t want many people to know about her personal life –– especially since she’s still demanding respect among her peers and crew. they didn’t need to see her showing off the puppy love she felt for the male, although she hasn’t said those words to him yet. still, halcyon made sure to send him pictures and videos while she’s been away. the female smirked, seeing her boyfriend prepared for their long night. “didn’t think you could hold off without me for two months.” halcyon grabbed his shoulders, pushing him on to the bed as she crawls up on top of him. “but i need you too, now.”

halcyon & harley (alt).

they’ve been sneaking around for the last few weeks. they had yet to confirm or deny a relationship. but ever since that day in harley’s room where they had sex for the first time together, they couldn’t get enough of each other. it was a clear addition that neither one of them wanted to admit. she had gotten home from practice, both of her parents still out of town for a reunion in the next town over. their nights together have become more frequent, often falling asleep together in the same bed after their time orgasming. halcyon even showed him how to sneak into her bedroom, for when her parents were home. since arriving, she hasn’t texted harley since before and figured that tonight she’ll be alone. the thought didn’t sit well with halcyon but she didn’t want to form a relationship, despite her own feelings towards him. stepping out of the shower with her towel wrapped around her body, halcyon was greeted with harley sitting on her bed. it was silent for a moment before he spoke, causing her to bite her bottom lip. part of her wanted to tell him to leave, that tonight wasn’t it but the need to have him near was larger than her own will. was it possible that through sex, she has fallen in love? stepping closer to him, her hands placed gently on his cheeks, rubbing the skin gently. he removed her towel, allowing it to drop on the floor. harley knew what she wanted without her having to say a word. he laid a kiss on her chest, whispering those three words and before she knew, halcyon was laying on her back, lips locking on to his. “harley..” she whispered, fingers in his hair as he worked her core. “i need you too.” not only in sex, but forever.

danielle & harley.

danielle couldn’t take this life she lived anymore. every day, it was a nightmare. her husband caused a scene over the smallest thing, often blaming her although she had no hand in whatever it may be. this life was no longer her own –– everything that she held dear to her was taken away. her dancing, her sketches books, her communication with her father and brother, even the charities that she adored were removed from her life. she was a prisoner, a property value to her husband and step-father. all was taken from her except for one person: harley. danielle always managed to sneak away from her husband’s grip, hiding out in their secret apartment and knowing full well she’d have to pay the price later. in her miserable life, harley was the light that she needed to go on every day. even with everything they’ve been through –– the drugs, the rehab, the break-ups –– they always found a way back to each other. however, they have once again landed in a fight. it was clear that neither one of them could handle being apart from each other for too long. they were in love. in her mind, it seemed almost impossible for her to leave her husband but when harley yelled that he needed her, that was the final strike. “then take me to america!” she cried, forcing herself to hold back the tears that were forming. “i want to be in your life forever, have your last name and have children with you. i love my country but i love you more, far more than words could describe, mon amour. i hate saying good-bye and i do not want to do it again. take me with you.”

dimitri & andi.

those three words were tough for him to hear over the webcam. dimitri could have never foreseen this coming when he signed up to join the marines. not that andi was pregnant with their first child, that his father-in-law was getting worse by the day or that he was staying on location for much longer than he thought. a part of him wished that he remained home instead of signing up, to keep making videos and stay home with andi during this time. however, it’s not the case. there was no way dimitri could go back home at this stage, they were stuck until then. he’d miss the birth of his child and the possible chance to say good-bye to andrew. the guilt in his heart was heavy, something that he wasn’t proud of. he had to look away from the monitor, unable to look at his heavily pregnant wife on the screen. “i’m so sorry..” he mumbles, knowing full well that she could not hear those words but could hear his sobs.

gabriel & grey.

it was as if they were riding a bike. nothing between them as changed, other than the fact that they were older, much more experienced in the bedroom and have an equal amount of money in their bank accounts. either way, they were still the same individuals who fell in love all those years ago –– that has never changed. she sat on his lap as they overlooked the gardens of his home, both not having changed out of their pjs for the last two days with bed hair present. they were supposed to be taking a breather, eating a small meal before they got back into bed. however, it was clear that grey had other ideas, moving her hips against his in slow motion. his green hues looked at the back of her blonde hair, hearing her whisper those three words he always enjoyed. one hand held her hip as the other moved around, touching her core through the thin material of her thong. “alors je te ferai l'amour, mon amour” he mentions, allowing his fingers to enter her with ease. “mais je vais vous faire crier aussi.”

sage & connor.

they couldn’t get their hands off each other. the only time they decided to be civil was around noah but considering he was off with his father, all bets were off. the couple made the agreement to start experimenting in the bedroom. sage never backed down from a challenge but this was a whole new ballpark for her, especially with a man that she truly loved. they’ve been dating for almost a year and they have made progress, in the bedroom and out of it. right now, however, they were removing articles of clothing left and right, lips unable to get away from each other. sage sat on top of him, growing wetter by the second as her hips moved against his hard-on. her hands were about to pull away from his locks and to remove the material that separated them from continuing this activity. however, when connor pulled away to say those words to her, sage noticed a difference in his eyes. it wasn’t lust in his eyes, it was love. with that realization, a tint of blood rushed to her cheeks, smiling softly at her boyfriend. “i’m not going anywhere, baby…” she stated, bringing her right hand down and held her pinky out. “that’s a promise.”

boden & charlie.

boden wanted nothing more than some time to take a break and be with his girlfriend. however, with his new album coming out in the next few weeks, he knew that there was more buzz needed for sales to go up. truth be told, he didn’t care about the money and simply wanted to make good music but he understood how the industry worked. still, he didn’t expect to make an instagram live while on vacation with charlie. he promised that it would only be thirty minutes but somehow it ended up being an hour, answering fan questions and giving small snippets of what’s to come. boden was supposed to be on for another fifteen minutes but charlie whispered in his ear, stating that she needed him in her spanish accent. he was forever thankful that the camera was fixated on him from the chest up because she had moved away from the screen, only to start teasing him from the side. “well, that’s all for this live. see you all in the next one!” he quickly said to the camera, turning off the stream to give his girlfriend his full attention. “you are a sneaky, sneaky girl and i fucking love you for it.”

[mylutteoheart]

Con mis besos yo te haré feliz. Mil flores y regalos yo te daré.

this is part 2 of my fic for day 1. I accidentally deleted it but I re-wrote it and it’s not the exact same thing as the original but I feel like this version is better.

Also, I won’t be participating tomorrow because I couldn’t really come up with a good story.

prompt: “I offer you my bed to sleep in because our respective roommates are getting it on in your room and take the sofa to sleep on, only I wake up back in my bed with your tiny body wrapped around me and damn me if it isn’t the cutest thing I’ve ever seen”

find my other fics here

Luna got back home late. She had a late night class at her Uni. She was happy to finally be back at her apartment. But when she arrived, something weird was going on.

When she unlocked the door, she heard some noises. I took her a while to figure out where they came from. Eventually, she figured out that they came from her bedroom. She was very confused about this all. So she decided to check it out. Her door was closed, which was weird because she never closes that door. She slowly opened it because she was a little scared about what she might find there. 

To her surprise, she found Gastón and Nina lying down on her bed. Only, the thing was that one was lying on top of the other and she quietly stepped backwards in shock.

"I was shocked too." she heard a familiar voice from behind her. Of course it was Matteo, he was standing in the doorway, he probably heard her come home. It isn't a suprise since they live next to each other.

The sudden voice did startle her a little. "Matteo, you startled me." she said in all honesty.

"I can see that and I can't blame you. Having someone so handsome standing in your doorway all of a sudden is very surprising." he gave her his typical smirk. She just smiled and shook her head. "Why don't you come over to my apartment? You can't stay here whil you saw what you saw now can you?" he asked.

She hesitated at first but she agreed in the end. They went together to his apartment. He immediately walked to the kitchen and offered her a plate full of food. "I'm guessing you weren't able to eat yet and as luck would have it, I cooked for Gastón until I discovered where he was at." he gave her a comforting smile and agreed to eat it. He apparently hadn't eaten yet either so he took his plate and hers and put it on the table so they could eat together.

It felt a bit weird for Luna to do this, they have been on a few dates before and this just felt like an actual date but she didn't want to make the remark. Instead, she tried to enjoy her dinner and she did. It was delicious and she thanked him for the food.

They put their plates and other dishes in the dishwasher and suddenly, Matteo got nervous and she noticed so she did what she could and gave him an assuring smile and she took his hand in his. This gave him enough courage to say what he wanted to: "Do you want to sleep over? Your room is taken at the moment and I don't think it would be nice to sleep in the same house as them."

They haven't really made it official yet so she didn't really know what to say and he could see the panic on her face "Of course I'll let you sleep in my bed and I'll sleep on the couch. Gastón's room is very messy so you don't want to sleep in there." he squeezed her hand lightly and this made her give in and she said yes. This made Matteo very happy and he hugged her.

She went to her own apartment to get her pjs, she decided it'd be best if she changed at Matteo's place because she didn't want to stay here long. She was in and then out.

Matteo was excited that Luna was staying over but sadly, it wasn't like he imagined the first this would happen. He didn't want to go too fast with her because he didn't want to mess this up. It was pretty safe to say that after the couple of dates they had, he had strong feelings for her and he didn't want to change that.

Luna went to the bathroom and it took everything in Matteo to stay away from that room. It was tempting, yes, but he couldn't.

She had her hair in a ponytail and she was wearing shorts and a top. "You look amazing." it came out before he knew it but it made her smile. That always made him feel better, no matter what. Her smile was radiant just like she was.

They both went to sleep at the same time. Both happy to be here.

Luna woke up in the middle of the night to get a glass of water and on her way to the kitchen, she came across Matteo sleeping on the couch. She took a minute to take in the view. He looked so handsome just sleeping there. But he didn't really seem comfortable, she couldn't really enjoy the view for long because he kept turning. He obviously couldn't find a comfortable position and she felt bad. She couldn't allow him to suffer so as soon as he was facing her again, she decided to wake him up. She tried to shake him lightly at first but he slept too deep to notice it.

After a couple of minutes thinking, she decided to go with a more drastic approach. She had to admit, she didn't want it to be like this but she couldn't come up with anything else so she leaned in slowly. Then, she put her lips on his and in a somewhat automatic response, he kissed her back. Not opening his eyes but waking up. Then when realization hit him, he woke up.

He shot up in surprise. When he saw who just kissed him, he made place for her to sit on the couch next to him. "I'm sorry." was all she said.

"Why did you do that?" he just wanted to know.

"I wanted to wake you up and at first I couldn't and then this is what I came up with." she admitted shyly.

"Why did you want to wake me up?" he was really confused.

"I saw you sleeping and you looked very uncomfortable, I couldn't stand seeing you like that." she looked away so he wouldn't see her shyness.

This comment made him smile anyway. "And how are you going to fix that?" he was a bit amused.

"I was thinking that maybe you could sleep in your bed as well." now it was her turn to be nervous.

"You don't mind?" he asked seriously.

"No, of course not." this made her turn to him and smile.

"Okay, then." it's the only thing he could say. This gave her the invitation to take his hand in hers and lead him to his bed. She did all of this with confidence. They both got in the bed, they were both a bit unsure. They eventually decided to turn their backs towards each other. It seemed like the best thing to do.

When they both fell asleep, unconsciously, Matteo turned on his back and Luna turned around to face him. After a while, they were lying closer within each other's reach. Then, Luna put her arm and her leg around him. They stayed like this for the rest of the night.

Matteo was the first one to wake up. He slowly opened his eyes and he felt all kinds of butterflies inside his stomach and he felt a warmth going through his body and then he realized what happened. Luna's body was wrapped around him and honestly, it was the cutest thing he has ever seen. He wanted this moment to last because he had no idea if this was going to happen again. He wanted this all the time, waking up and seeing her beside him. He would even want to have lazy morning kisses. This made him flashback to last night. They kissed for the first time and he never imagined it like this. But he couldn't complain, he was happy to finally have kissed her even if he was very sleepy at the time.

But now it was time for her to wake up and as soon as she realized how they were lying, her cheeks started to get red. It made this even more adorable for him. Without thinking, he gave her a kiss on her head and this seemed to take her blushing away.

"Why are you looking at me like that?" she asked after some time. He didn't take his eyes off her and he smiled from ear to ear and his eyes were shining.

“I offer you my bed to sleep in because our respective roommates are getting it on in your room and take the sofa to sleep on, only I wake up back in my bed with your tiny body wrapped around me and damn me if it isn’t the cutest thing I’ve ever seen”  he said in one breath.  

They lied there for a few moments more until he eventually got up but she didn't want to. She was too comfortable. This gave him an idea. His smirk kind of gave it away and she got scared of what was about to happen. He ignored her warning looks and he took her in his arms, bridal style and she couldn't help but let out a giggle and he laughed on his turn. He put her on the counter of the kitchen and he started to make breakfast. It was pancakes. She watched him make them. It was very entertaining for her and they just laughed all the time. They acted as if it has been like this for years, it was just so natural for both of them.

When the pancakes were done, he put them on the kitchen table and helped her off the counter. She was about to sit down when he stopped her in her tracks by intertwining her fingers with his. This made her turn around and he could see a look of confusion on her face. He leaned in and eventually, his lips landed on hers and in a matter of seconds, they were kissing intensely. Nothing mattered but their lips touching. This was the kind of kiss he imagined and it felt so good. Bolts of electricity were felt as they were touching. His one hand on her waist and his other hand still intertwined with hers. Her other hand was on his cheek. The world seemed to fade away.

After a while, they pulled apart to finally eat something and now they both hopedmore sleepovers like this would happen and he wanted to kiss her a thousands times over. Luckily, there was time for all of that.

[5evahbeyou]

The Big Four:And the missing gem (Book 1)

Chapter 3: Continuation

Jack’s POV:

I guess me being a sissy back then has made Merida’s life worth hell.I looked across the table, her read fiery hair outstanding the others.Her hair was everywhere but she was cute enough,okay what the hell Jack?! “You’re staring at her again,Jack.”Eugene said,”I do not.It’s just her hair is eye-catching.”Oh really?” Guy said,wiggling his eyebrows.I laughed but I was still looking at her, she was talking at a blond girl with side bangs.”You know, the best way to apologize to a princess is giving her flowers and chocolates?””What the hell Eugene?!””Eugene laughed,I rolled my eyes, I saw guy was talking to a girl named Rebecca.She seemed nice,I can tell by how she says sorry so much.I over heard their conversation,'Im really sorry about knocking you out a while ago.''Nah,no worries!' I let out a scoff,Eugene looked at me then looked at guy."Well, would you look at that.Guy seems to be the girl catcher,eh?" He said, wr both laughed so hard I thought I was going to faint.

As Nicholas dismissed all of us,I decided to sneak out after they’ve showed us the dorm.The head boy and head girl aligned us, separating the male and female.”Allow me to introduce myself,I am Scar.””And I am Emma.We are your Head boy and Head girl.Please remember to follow us,no one must leave the group.Follow the line and remember,if anything happens scream out our names.”Emma said,she and Scar walked out of the Dining hall as everyone followed.Me and Eugene exchanged looks, it seems we were far from the Dining hall.We turned Right, then walked a long corridor.And there it was,our dorm.It was huge! Like it was our own castle.”Emma and Scar stopped, they looked at us and spoke.”As you can see This place is the Hydra’s dormitories.We are a little far away but it doesn’t matter.”Emma said, trying to headcount before entering.

“First of all,we have different dormitories in this castle like structure.The first years are on the first floor,second years on second, and so on and so forth.Almost every dorm in the other houses have are spread out.At least it’s convenient for you guys,The higher your year level, the far you are from the Dining Hall and classes.At least here in Hydra,it’s only far away from the Dining Hall.”Scar said,They then went inside the building,as we went inside,the other years are scrambling up,”Its almost night time, you better be in your dorms!”Emma shouted,everyone hurriedly got up,running for their dear life.

“So here is the Lobby, everyone is free to stay here and do all the things you need.”You also have your own living rooms for each dorm.Scar said,,”Before letting you go, We would like to give you these simple rules.The first one is everyone must clean up the lobbyand your living room.If you happen to be the last person to use the lobbyand living room,please, clean up your place.”Emma stated, emphasizing the word clean.”Rule number two,don’t forget to greet one another since we are all in this together.And it’s better to make friends.But please no bullying around here.”Scar said,looking at Emma who seemed to be,blushing?

”W-We have a long history of how Hydra’s are depicted as evil.Please,let us change that.We might be mischievous but we aren’t all that bad.”“So with that,welcome first years and I hope you have a pleasant night."Scar shouted before pointing to where our dormitories are.”As you enter each of your dorms, you still have a living room where you can relax.Everyone has their own room so best be having chit-chats on your living room.”Scar said and left the boys to do what they need.The girls went to their rooms while us went also. Eugene,Guy and I aren’t far from each other,they’re just two rooms away from me.Each room has his name plates on the doors.As I opened my room,I saw my white bunny nibbling on a carrot.He looked cute enough for me to get him out of the cage and hug him"Oh jamie, you look so cute I can't!" I said,After looking around the room,there was a switch where it can snow.Strange,I decided to flick it, and it really snowed in my room,My staff was on top of my drawer, looking like the stick you could find.

I shouted with glee,jumping from my bed to the couch,I even tried to make snowballs.I was about to relax when I remembered I needed to apologize to Merida."But do I really have to?"I asked myself, I can just apologize tomorrow.I migbt risk my self from getting caught, but I'm already feeling bad about what happened to Merida back then.So I quickly took a shower, changed into my PJ’s and tried to be stealthy as possible.

Merida’s POV:

The Academy was pretty huge, it was as if I was living in a real,huge castle.I quickly got two Scottish Pie,everyone looked at me,”Wha’?I’m starvin’!” I chuckled letting out a snort in the making, The girl that hiccup was with a while agi then changed sits with the girl beside me.”Hi.””Uhm,Hi.”I replied,trying to flip away her bangs so she could see me.”I’m Astrid by the way.””Merida,nice te meet ye Astrid.” I said,smiling at her.”Well Merida,are you really a princess?”She asked, smirking at me,I gave her a ‘what-kind-of-question-is-that’ look.But I nodded, taking a mouthful of Mash potatoes and a turkey.Astrid giggled,”At least you aren’t what other princess are.”

I gave her a smile,we continued to chat and to be honest,it was fun talking to her.”So wait, Hiccup was really scrawny back then?”I said, trying not to laugh.She laughed with me and nodded,”Yeah, but we then went dating after the whole Dragon fiasco in Berk.””An’ how long ye been guys datin’?”About 3 years now.”She said, trying to conceal a blush.I nodded, she was obviously in love with Hiccup.I laughed at her,how her cheeks was turning red.I took my last pie and tried to eat it whole.Everyone laughed at me,”Dan’ it.It doesn’ fit on me mouth.”I said, as I slice it in three,still big enough but at least it fits in my mouth now.My eyes wondered off, laying my eyes on Hiccup,he was looking at me.So I nudged Astrid,he looked at me then looked to what I was looking.We gave him a smile and a wave.He waved back,and I wanted to eat the pie so badly that I almost choked to death.

“Woah woah woah,Easy their tiger.”Astrid said, as she hand me a glass of water.I gulped it fast,and let out a sigh of relief.”Thanks Astrid, I thought I was going to die.”I said sarcastically,we both laugh,she was drinking milking but she spat it in front of a girl named Eep."Hey!""I'm so sorry I didn't mean to.Merida,look what you've done!" I looked at her, laughing"Me?I wasn't the one who spat on her." I tried not to laugh, Eep was already laughing,the panicked face Astrid made me laugh so hard I stumbled off on my sit.Everyone looked at me,I gave a sheepish smile and said,"Well,my bum is big enough to save meh."Everyone let out a laugh,I sat back down beside Astrid,she was clutching her stomach for the love of Mo'rdu.I finished my pie, and got an apple as my final meal of the night.”Yo red head, ya might want to tone it down a bit.You’re going to explode.”Some guy with a grin plastered on his face,I looked at him in the eye, deadly enough for him to be startled,”And ye better shut up, or ye head might explode.”I said, as I got out my bow and arrow.”Merida,don’t, we’ll start with him tomorrow.”Astrid said and glared at the man.The guy looked away, as his comrades laughed at him.Nicholas dismissed the students,every upper year levels went to their dorm while all the first years were left.

The head boy and head gal counted us first before nodding that everyone was here.”Hello everyone and welcome to North Academy.I’m Fryer.”And am Lily.You’re majesty, it’s my greatest day to finally meet ye.”The head girl looked at me and bowed down.”Erm,please don’ do that.Just let me be like the others.I feel left out.”I said,she nodded and gave a smile.”Before ye get goin’ te your dorms.Please do a straight line,the boys and gals separated.”Lily said and trying to separate each one of us.Astrid was in front of me,and the girl named Eep was at my back.”Now,before we leave I want you guys to remember the location of your Dorms.Each year level has it’s own dorms.But for now, your dorm is a little far away from the Dining Hall and some other rooms.”Fryer said, Both of them then left the room,everyone tailing them,I tried memorizing the directions but my eyes kept on wandering to the yetis who happened to roam around with a wooden broom.A few minutes later we finally reached our destination.The dorm was a little far away.But we where near the big meadow and the dorm of the 3rd years of Sphinx. 

“Before we enter,this door is fire proof, and sturdy enough,since we’re in the meadow,it occasionally gets bombarded with weapons  and fire.”Lily stated,As we enter, the room was covered with red and orange decorations.”Okay woah,I think my eyes are melting.”Astrid said, trying not to laugh but failed.”I’ll explain a little about this dorm.This is the living room.Please use it wisely,clean up your stuff if you ever use this place.If you want to let other houses to come in,be sure to keep an eye on them.Especially the Hydra’s they’ve been doing Mischief for how long.”Fryer said,Lily rolled her eyes at him.”But please,be kind enough to everyone,most especially to the Hydra’s they might be doing things for no good, but they are trying to change their name after the incident with a student.”Lily said,everyone murmured,whispering from each other.

Fryer face palmed, “Lily, please.Don’t tell them.”Ahm sorry.”She said, lowering her head.Fryer looked at him momentarily but looked away.”First rule is again, please go back to the dorms immediately.No loitering around in campus.Rule number two,if someone fights,let them be surrounded and don’t let them escape.If they have done wrong,its best to let them talk to one another.”Fryer said,”Never,ever forget rule number 2.Compassion is what makes our bond strong.Be-friend one another,you’ll need it to protect one another.”Lily said and smiled.After the rules explained, Fryer and Lily escorted us to our separate room.The Boys went to a corridor from the right while us from the left.As we open the dorm,the long corridor greeted us.

”Find your rooms,every room has a name plate on it.”Lily said and left.I looked at Astrid,she was in the first room.”Well would you look at that,It’s easy for me to go in and out.”She said,I looked for my room, and I was 4 rooms away from her.”Hey Astrid, I’m here!” I shouted,Astrid nodded and we both went to take a bath and change to our sleeping attires. “Well,goodnight Merida.”Astrid said,I waved back and was about to go into my room when she shouted,”Don’t forget to brush your hair!”Astrid said,laughing at me.I laughed at the joke and went to my room.My bow and arrow on the table.I saw the tapestry me mom and I made.It made the room like home.I heard a neighing,and saw Angus in the room left to my Bed.”Angus! Yer here!Why ye hiding here boy?Are ye trying to surprise me?”I said, patting its body.He neighed and nibbled on my hair.I let out a laugh.”Yer a sweetie,aren’t ye?”I said,I took out an apple in my backpack.”Here ya go boy!”I said,and gave it to Angus.My room was pretty big on the inside.I have my own stable for crying out loud!

I took the pitchfork and got some hay for Angus.My saddle was their,even Angus feeder was their! I designed it myself,carving me and Angus riding through the air.”G’night Angus.Rest well.” I said and went to bed.But I couldn’t sleep,something was bothering me and I don’t know why.So I got out of my room,I took a peak in the room and only Astrid was their.I went to her,”Heya Astrid.””Hey Merida.”she said,giving me a sleepy smile.”Why don’t ya sleep?” “I can’t,Stormfly has been ruining my dream by snorting a lot.”She said giggling,”If ye want,ye can stay at my room for now.”She gave me a smile,”Sure!I’ll be glad.”She said and stood up,”Astrid,I’m goin’ out.Rest assured,I’m just goin’ to roam around.””But what if someone sees you?””Of course no one can,I’ll be like a shadow,lurkin’ away.”I said mimicking a shadow by hiding from the curtains.Astrid laughed,”Well, be sure not to get caught.I’ll try to make a fake Merida.” she said and left the living room.

I took my cloak from the bedroom and left the dorm quietly.I sneaked out,trying not to be seen by the Head boys and girls of each Houses. After a little walk, I saw a white headed boy,lurking from the shadows. Mo’rdu,please don’t tell me I saw a ghost.I took a peek to find the boy gone.’Please,don’t be a ghost.’I murmured,I quickly hear chatters.I sat down and blended myself from the shadow,I thank my cloak to really blend from the dark.”And this girl had this wild hair!If only you saw it.It was cool.”The head boy of Sphinx said, as their voice went to a murmur.I quickly got from one place to another,when I finally saw a tree not far from a lake.It was blooming so much that the petals were scattered on the ground.I sat down behind the tree,as I inhaled the fresh air outside.

It felt like home,but of course,I won’t be home for now.I tried not to cry but I failed miserably.I wiped away the tears,thinking I’m far away from my home.Suddenly I heard rustling from the bushes that surrounded me.I didn’t bring my bow,I was terrified, but luckily I knew how to fight with my own hands.I stand up, looking at the rustling bushes,suddenly Jack got out of the bush.”Ugh! It’s itchy.”He said,I looked at him or should I say glared at him.He looked at my way,”Erm,hi?” He said,”What ye want Frost boy.”I spatted out,he looked at me,embarrassed to even speak.”I’m-,I-I-””Spit it out ya buffoon!”I said, shouting but as low as my voice could go.He let out a sigh and looked at me sternly.”Merida Dunbroch,my sincerest apology from our past encounter.”He said and knelt down, I looked at him dumbfounded,”I’m teribbly sorry for what I did back then.I was just really into your hair and accent that I got carried away.I know I may be naughty,but please.Could you give this Frost a chance?”He asked,looking at me with those blue eyes of his.

I didn’t want to laugh, but I couldn't take it.I laughed shortly after he stood up, trying to conceal the noise I was producing.I couldn’t take it,I even clutched my stomach,I thought it was being ripped apart.”What’s so funny?”He asked, his eyes revealed a sad look.I stood up,trying myself to stop laughing.I took a deep breath and said,”Yer forgiven.But please,don’ do tha’.You look like yer my servant who got tangled into some trouble.”I said smirking at him.Placing hand on my hips.He gave out a sigh of relief,he went near me and got out his hand.”Well,let’s start this from the top.Hi,I’m Jack.”I let out a giggle,surely this is funny enough.”And I’m Merida,I’m glad to meet ya frosty.”I said and let out a chuckle.He looked at me funnily and said,”Well red,at least I got to be-friend a un-tamed princess like you.”He said,I punched him on the arm, he winced from the impact."Ow!I thought we are good?!" "Well you called me red, and un-tamed.Who calls a person like that?" i sarcastically said,I laughed, after a while he joined giggling with me.We suddenly heard chatters,so we ran fast as we can to leave the place.

“Well princess, I bid you adieu.”He said and bowed down to me.I punched him in the arm,laughing at his actions.”Stay frosty white boy.”I said and snickered at his expression.I went running to our dorm,the others are already sleeping.So I quickly got into my room,removing the cloak and went to sleep beside Astrid, who was sleeping like a cat.

Rapunzel’s POV:

Me and Hiccup wasn’t able to sleep. he got out after sleeping for a few hours but couldn’t continue.We were in the living room, looking at the ceiling.”Hey Hiccup, do you know Eugene?””No,why?””Oh nothing,I saw him a while ago staring at me.I was wondering if you knew him.”I said, letting out a giggle.Hiccup looked at me,”Oh,so the little blondie here is in love I see?”He tease. I rolled my eyes,”I can’t say I love him,but I like him.I guess.””How did you know him?”He asked,”Oh you see,we live in the same place.Corona,I am,well a princess of Corona.And he was just another guy from my land.””Oh,really.Just another guy?”He teased, I let out a laugh.

”Well I thought so,I kept on seeing him around doing all sorts of jobs.””And you just went,’I think I like this guy.’Am I right?” He asked,I nodded to his answer and obviously I blushed.”Well,there’s a lot of time to know him Punzie,but if you want.I’ll help you out.”He said and gave a smile,”Would you really?” I asked trying not to squeal from glee.He nodded but let out a yawn.”Well,I’ll be going to sleep now Punzie. Goodnight.”He said and went off to the boys room.I also let out a yawn,I was beginning to drift away to dreamland.I quickly got up and went to my room.Nuzzled myself to sleep.

I finally have finished the continuation of the 3rd Chapter! I can feel my fingers trembling from typing and writing the whole story. I hope you have a great day lads and laddies! Tata for now,and wait for my other update tomorrow!

Btw, I’m not going to do Jackunzel here.It’s because,well i’ll keep that as a secret for now! 

BOOK 1: 

CH: 1-2-3(1)

[lowdenfordays]

I wrote a little (rather long) imagine about Jack Lowden. Hope you like it!

Worst First Date

 You stood in your hotel room, wearing a towel dressing gown with your hair wrapped up in a towel turban, doing your makeup. Six pairs of eyes were watching you as you contoured your cheeks. The guys – Jack, Tom, Barry, Fionn, Harry and Aneurin – shouldn’t have been so fascinated with how you applied your makeup. You were one of the makeup artists on he set of Dunkirk, so you spent hours putting powder on them every day. Yet you rarely wore makeup yourself, so maybe it was seeing you all dolled up that had them in raptures. Usually, you had to wake up so early, and were so busy with them, that you didn’t bother to even make yourself look presentable. There had been a small effort at first – tugging a brush through your wavy mess of hair or shoving a bit of mascara on – but by now you just chucked your hair in a messy bun and put your glasses on. You had contact lenses, but only bothered to wear them on special occasions. You were wearing them tonight. You had a date.

 Working on film sets meant you had to travel a fair amount (a blessing more than a curse, let’s be real, some of the places you’d seen were incredible) but it hadn’t been very conducive to getting a boyfriend. You’d been out to a bar in the local town last week with the guys when a local French man, by the name of Mathis, had started flirting with you. He was a little older, maybe thirty, but completely gorgeous and his French accent practically made you drool. Who can resist an accent? So, by the end of the night when he’d asked you out to dinner and placed a kiss on your cheek, you were putty in his hands.

 Tonight was the night, and you were dressing up to the nines. It had been over six months since you’d last had sex, and you fully intended to share Mathis’s bed. You’d done a smoked burnt orange eyeshadow, with a succulent brick red lip. As you finished with a final flourish of highlighter, just for luck, you spun around, placed your hands on your hips and struck a pose.

“What do you think? Will I do?” you questioned, popping your hip, shrugging your shoulder and batting your eyelids you show off your killer eyelashes.

“Well your face looks top, but I’d question the outfit choice,” Barry joked with a smile. “I’m no fashionista but I think you can do better than a hotel dressing gown.”

 You rolled your eyes and plucked your dress off the wardrobe door where it had been hanging in readiness. It was a gorgeous blood orange number. It wrapped across the front, meeting in a plunging neckline and cinching you in at the waist. It showed off your curves in all the right places, and you always felt hella sexy in it. You hurried into the bathroom to change and threw some mousse in your hair to tame your curls. You left them down to fall wildly around your face, but in all honesty, they just fell right tonight. So often your hair had a mind of its own but tonight it seemed to be on side, happy to comply. You admired yourself in a full-length mirror beside the bath for a moment and gave a small, satisfied nod, allowing a smirk of appreciation to flicker on your lips. You went back out into the bedroom where the guys were waiting to see the finished article. A chorus of cheers and wolf whistles greeted you as you sauntered in, and you indulged them with a little catwalk-style strut down the length of the room, even punctuating it with a pose at the end. You stole a glance at Jack, who looked curiously sad.

 Since you had arrived on set and met the guys, you’d always had a soft spot for Jack. He had gone out of his way from the start to make you feel at home, inviting you to hang out with the guys. You were younger than your fellow makeup and costume artists, so felt slightly out of place hanging out with them. They all had partners and children, so you usually sat like a lemon with them, not knowing what to say. Jack made sure you could hang out with the guys, who were all closer to your age and were so much fun. Jack had a killer sense of humour and wore a glint in his startling blue eyes that so often made the breath hitch in your throat. The gentle flirtations the two of you exchanged, though apparently harmless, had secretly kindled a passion in your chest that had sparked the very first time you saw him. You knew it was impossible for the two of you, there was no way he would ever like you in that way, so you had dismissed the notion moments after it first entered your head. You were too close as friends for that anyway, and you didn’t want to ruin what was quickly becoming the most important friendship in your life.

 “Suitably sexy?” you asked, raising your eyebrow suggestively.

 “He won’ be able te keeps his hands off ye, Y/N,” Jack said. His tone was far more serious than you had expected, which threw you off a touch. You had expected him to come out with some suggestive quip, but he just looked down and fiddled with his shirt hem.

 You buckled a pair of black heels on and grabbed your purse. After some words of encouragement from all your best boys, laced with a couple of threats of, “If he hurts you I swear to god…”, you headed out to meet your date.

 -----------

Three hours later and you were back in your hotel room sobbing. The date had gone terribly and all you wanted was to take all your makeup off, get in your PJs, curl up with a cup of tea and scroll through dog rescue websites. Or have a cuddle. A cuddle would be good too.

Despite your attempts to be quiet, the guys must have heard you snivelling from the room next door. There was a gentle knock, followed by Fionn’s voice saying, “Y/N, are you okay? Can we come in?”

You quickly pulled your fluffy PJs on and opened the door to see the same crew from before, all looking concerned. You were grateful that you’d managed to wipe your makeup off before then, so you weren’t mascara stained, but you were sure your eyes were suitably red and puffy. You stood aside to let them all in, then threw yourself on the bed with a sigh.

 “Didn’t go too well then?” Aneurin ventured softly.

 You groaned out a “No” into the sheets, and felt the bed dip as someone came to sit beside you. They started to gently stroke your hair, fingers glancing off the back of your neck. You knew it was Jack; it smelled like him.

“What happened love?” he all but whispered.

 You hauled yourself up in to a sitting position, and looked around to see six concerned men, all staring at you with so much affection that it calmed you enough to tell your story.

“It had started out alright. He did show up 20 minutes late, but he was so apologetic, and told me that he’d been caught up at work, so I let it slide. He bought the drinks, and we started chatting. It was going okay, he was making me laugh, until the waiter came over and he suggested I get a salad because he ‘usually likes his women in better shape’.” That garnered sufficient horror from the guys, which made you feel a little better. “So that set a bad tone. Obviously I wasn’t really interested after that, but I was just going to sit the date through, until I saw him eyeing up other women. He literally said the words, ‘Look at the rack on that one’ to me. But that wasn’t even the worst part. The last straw was his wife walking in and starting a screaming match with him. I tried to leave but she pushed me back down in my seat and wouldn’t let me go. I had to just sit there for half an hour while they screamed bloody murder at each other in French and glared at me every so often. It was mortifying.” You finished your tale with a huff and let Jack pull you in for a cuddle.

“I really thought he was a nice guy. I’m such an idiot. How do I manage to pick them so wrong?”

 Harry sat down on the other side of you a placed a comforting hand on your knee, saying, “You’re not an idiot, the right guy is waiting for you Y/N, honestly. You deserve so much better than that, but it’ll happen.”

 You hadn’t even been looking for anything serious from this date, or so you’d thought. But hearing Harry’s words made you realise how much you really wanted someone. You’d been single for such a long time, but it was more than sex you were after… it was love. You wanted someone to come home to everyday, and call your own.

 “You always find the right person as soon as you stop looking”, Fionn chimed in.

 “Exactly, and I bet that person is closer than you think”, said Tom.

 Unbeknownst to you, the guys were all throwing pointed looks at Jack as they spoke. You had buried your head in his chest and were too wrapped up in your misery to notice. Your sudden romantic epiphany had left you feeling woefully alone. You drew what comfort you could from his warmth.

He placed a soft kiss on your head and said, “You’re incredible Y/N. You’re funny and kind and gentle. Ye always know what te say and ye light up every room ye walk into. Any man would be lucky te have ye”.

 You were shocked by his sudden outburst. He was usually so light-hearted, and took the piss out of you mercilessly. You teased him back in good measure, and even then it was usually based on looks. He’d make some joke about you looking sexy with your glasses, with a bare face and bird’s-nest hair. You’d return, in mock confusion, that you didn’t understand how he was always so attractive in character but as soon as he was himself again the magic was lost. You were close, for sure. You’d watch movies together when everyone else had gone out., you’d cuddle, share stories, hopes and dreams. He was your best friend. But all of a sudden, with those simple words, he was so much more. He was sweet and gentle and everything you ever wanted. That instant had changed your feelings towards him forever. You pulled away from the hug slightly, keeping your arms draped around his chest, and looked into his eyes. They were so full of sadness, and something else you couldn’t quite place. The grey-blue seemed to swirl around in his irises like an ocean; undulating waves of grief reaching out with tentative tendrils, longing to touch the shore but being dragged back each time they got close. Was that it? Was it longing you saw in his eyes? Then those waves washed over you, drenching you in an impulsive need to kiss him. You ached with it, and you knew in your soul that you’d never be satisfied until your lips had met his.

 Someone coughed in the corner, maybe Barry, before you heard Aneurin mumble something about the time and needing to go to bed as they had a busy day of shooting ahead. You dragged yourself away from Jack and said your ‘goodnight’s, thanking them for looking out for you. Jack was the last to leave, lingering in the doorway after the others were heading back to their own rooms.

 “I meant what I said, Y/N. You’re the most beautiful person I’ve ever met, in every way.” His hand lifted to your face, and he brushed your cheek, oh so gently. The ghost of his touch left you trembling and you sighed into his body, desperate to close the space between you.

 He lent his forehead against yours and muttered, “Ye deserve better. Ye deserve someone who appreciates ye fer the woman ye are, who will love ye unconditionally, and show ye every second of everyday how special ye are.”

 You lifted your eyes to meet his and said, “Someone like you?”

 For a moment, all you could read in his face was astonishment, and panic smacked you in the face. Had you misread him? Had he just been trying to comfort you? Had you ruined your friendship, would it be awkward now? But in a second all your fears were washed away and bliss overcame you. He smiled, those dimples you loved emerging to emphasise his joy.

 When his lips met yours it was all you could do to not fall at his feet. They carried so much tenderness and desire, which soon turned into hunger when you kissed him back. He gripped your waist as your tongues danced, and you threw your arms around his neck. The kiss felt endless, but you parted far too soon. He pulled away, leaving you breathless, and you clung to him to steady yourself. A ragged gasp satisfied your need for oxygen, but couldn’t quench your yearning for him.

 “Ye have no idea how long I’ve been wantin’ to do tha’,” he chuckled, but you caught the slight tremble in his voice.

 You smiled and said with a smirk, “Well, you best not wait that long to do it again.”

[dawolf-nfl-reads-blog]

The Sole Source of Hope For the Raiders Following a Season of Disappointment

The Oakland Raiders, who are closer to being the Las Vegas Raiders, are coming up on the end of a disappointing season. For many of the fans, “disappointing” might be an understatement. It was no more than about 17 weeks ago that many had anticipated this team winding up in a playoff hunt, returning them to their fame of the 2016 season where they ended the year 12-4, their playoff hopes crushed perhaps only by injury (Carr’s leg) on one very somber Christmas Eve victory against the Indianapolis Colts. With only a couple weeks remaining in the regular season it’s clear that those who speculated a comeback season for the Raiders -led by none other than fan-favorite Head Coach Jon Gruden- certainly jumped the gun. There are those who still speculate that had the Raiders retained 2016 Defensive Player of the Year Khalil Mack, that maybe this whole team would look a lot different. And when you look to the northeast and see the Chicago Bears, who traded multiple 1st round picks for the DPOY, have clinched the NFC North title for the first time in 8 years, it’s easy to see why people imagine Mack’s impact on the Raiders might have led this team to seeing a lot more wins in the 4th quarter. It’s important to quickly note that Raiders Jon Gruden walked into a situation in Oakland that no head coach who also is charged with making sound business decisions for an NFL franchise would want to be wrapped up in. Khalil Mack was in a contract hold out, hoping to make the kind of money that QBs make, the kind of money that Chicago paid him at $141mil over 6 years, according to NFL.com. The Raiders would have been much more eager to offer Mack that money had they not offered their QB a $125 million dollar contract an offseason removed. Jon Gruden valued Khalil Mack and understands -maybe now more than ever- the value in having a great pass rush. But he made the business decision to not tie the Raiders hands in salary cap hell by being the franchise to spend more money between 2 players than any other franchise in the NFL. And as the ball club currently sit at 3-11 as I write this, it might seem like it all would have been worth it. But despite that abysmal win-loss record, there is a beacon of hope for the Raiders as they head into the 2019 offseason. A man whom many fans once crowned “The Chosen One,” QB Derek Carr is finishing the 2018 year in a fashion that any fan base and franchise can rally behind and move forward with. It’s been a season of ups and downs for Derek Carr and the fans watching him. The first quarter of the season felt like watching 2 different quarterbacks depending on which half of the game you were tuned in to. In the first half, Carr would make decisions and throws that we’re very accustomed to seeing from the young talent. The ball arrived on time to the likes of Jared Cook and co. (Cooper formerly included.) Displays of touch or tremendous arm strength, accuracy and precision, and pocket awareness are evident for portions of games (see game vs. Broncos, Dolphins.) But then something would happen in the 2nd half or even just 4th quarter of games where Carr would turn into a different QB. It was like the 27 year old QB was “seeing ghosts,” something we see from old veteran QBs like Eli Manning or Derek’s older brother David Carr back in the twilight of his QB career. Interceptions, thrown away balls, and unnecessary sacks became almost expected of the QB when watching those first few games (see game vs. Rams, Dolphins.) But something changed. A light switched on in week 8 in the Raiders home game versus the Colts. What we saw from Derek Carr was a QB who looked confident and capable of making every throw to keep his crumbling team competitive for 4 quarters. He hung in the pocket taking multiple big hits to complete passes in tight windows. He kept his poise and delivered picture-perfect rainbows to the likes of Seth Roberts for house calls (see 2nd qtr. 12:00mins). The QB rushed for his 1st career TD and ended the day with a stat line of 21/28, 244yds, 3TDs, 0Int, 1rushTD. But most of all, we saw a QB who, maybe for the first time all year, looked comfortable in Jon Gruden’s offense. This familiarity with the offense continued to develop for Carr and his December football has certainly been his best all year. So far in the month of December, Carr has a completion percentage of 68.3, thrown for 870yds, 6TDs, and 0INTs. In fact, Carr has not thrown a single interception since week 5 vs the LA Chargers. That’s a span of 9 games (so far) without an interception. His 278 consecutive pass attempts without an INT is the raiders franchise-record for the longest streak, breaking former Raiders QB Rich Ganon’s record. And what’s perhaps more impressive is that Carr’s streak is the longest active Passes without an INT streak in the NFL. Keep in mind that Carr is doing this with the likes of 33 year old WR Jordy Nelson, 7th round rookie WR Marcel Ateman, and TEs Jared Cook, Lee Smith, and Derek Carrier. The later of whom won the week 14 matchup against the Pittsburgh Steelers in a dramatic home-game affair. (See .) So what about Derek Carr’s quietly brilliant QB season and a 3-11 team under Coach Gruden should bode well for this franchise going forward? After all, 3-11 has them ranked 31st. Out of 32. Well, it boils down to 2 things, one of which I’ve covered plenty: Quarterback play and a ton capital. As Derek Carr continues to grow in Jon Gruden’s offense, we should continue to see the kind of results that we’ve looked at above. And keep in mind that Carr has only had one season in his career where he had previous experience running the Offense: 2016 in Bill Musgrave’s system. If you read my (only) previous piece on Sean McVay and Jared Goff, you already know how important the connection between a QB and system can be. And as Derek Carr grows more fluent in Gruden’s offense, Gruden will grow the pieces around Carr. Because Jon Gruden opted to trade Khalil Mack rather than pay him a mega-deal, Gruden not only has plenty of allocated funds in salary cap for free agents, but he also has 5 first round draft picks over the next 2 seasons. Now if you ask me, one of the first things Gruden needs to invest in is a higher quality offensive Tackle. Derek Carr has been sacked a total of 47 times this year. That’s 16 more sacks than his 2nd highest total in 2015 and the year’s not even finished. Now, Gruden did invest the team’s 2018 1st round draft pick in LT Kolton Miller, who was a surprise pick to many. Miller has shown flashes of being able to play LT at a high enough level but his performance suffers tremendously when LG Kelechi Osemele is not playing next to him due to injury. Miller single-handedly allowed 2 sacks vs. the Bengals in week 15 and Gruden responded saying it was something that “needed to be fixed.” My take? An offensive line coach with a better pedigree of producing high-level players than Tom Cable. With 3 picks in the first round of the 2019 draft, look for the Raiders to add a guy like OT Jonah Williams our Alabama or OT Greg Little out of Ole Miss. In addition to needing to take better care of Derek Carr, Gruden needs to make some moves to take care of his defense and add a pass rusher (or two!) This upcoming draft class boasts plenty of one-Man-wrecking-crew type of defensive linemen and after losing one of the best in the business in Khalil Mack, look for the Raiders to go big in that market. Gruden has already had success finding defensive linemen for the Raiders as he added 5th round pick Maurice Hurst who has been arguably the best rookie interior defensive line player, and rookies Arden Key and PJ Hall have looked promising. Ultimately, the biggest piece of the puzzle has already been put in place for Jon Gruden and the Raiders. They have their Quarterback - in case there was any question there. And that QB is going to improve from where he is now when he’s had a full year of running Gruden’s offense under his belt. The Raiders might be the second worst team in football right now but with Derek Carr behind Center, don’t count out any sort of comeback for this football team.

[be-ready-when-i-say-go]

A Family of Five- Part 9: A Family of Five, Not Including The Dogs

Calum and Harlowe’s marriage hasn’t always been easy, but it has always been filled with love. This is a collaborative experience with In Sorrow and In Joy. Dad!Calum. Black OC.

CW: Over the course of this series, there are mentions of pregnancy, therapy, and postpartum depression. There is also 18+ Content (Smut)

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No one has my permission to repost my work of fiction. This includes translations as well. 

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"How did you and Dad meet again?" Esha asks, setting her plate into the dishwater. The topic only came over dinner because Koha was talking about the next step with Davon. This comes at no shock, seeing as the pair has stuck out not only the last couple of years of secondary schools but also the distance of Davon at university. This sparked discussion about Calum and Harlowe, though most of the focus stayed on him. Until now, of course.

"I've told you this story so many times before," Harlowe laughs, sealing the tupperware top over the leftovers. It's a shock there ever are any with three kids. But Te Koha, now at 21, has moved out within the last year, so it's one less mouth to feed regularly. Esha will be going off to college at the end of August. That will just leave Nikau, the baby at 10, in the house. It's going to be too quiet without them. Never mind the fact that there's three dogs. There's less ruscus from the dogs now, as they've gotten older. They play a little, still like their walks, but at home it's time to lounge around, be the kings and the queen of the castle.

"But I haven't heard it Momma," Nikau pleads, handing his plate to Esha. He's a spitting image of Calum, the same fat cheeks, big brown eyes, and pouty lips.

"It's better when you tell it," Esha agrees, pressing a kiss to Harlowe's cheek. "Are those the last of the dishes before I start 'er up? Last call or your hand washing your dishes," she calls out to the house.

Harlowe shakes her head. There is no denying Esha on Harlowe's part. She'd be hard pressed if she wanted to even try. Between the personality and the soft and full cheeks and shade of brown, softer than Harlowe's hinting more to a caramel. Te Koha brings in the last of the dishes. "You don't have to yell. Mom does enough for all of us." He grins, skin dark like hers, grinning. "Still love you though."

"You're pushing it,just like your Papa Bear."

"What about me?" Calum asks, walking into the kitchen the dogs following behind him.

"Your child," Harlowe teases, "likes to push my buttons too."

"How do we know he's mine?" Cal grins.

Te Koha walks over, patting Calum on the shoulder. "I think it's evident enough," he laughs. Te Koha definitely got his height from Harlowe's side though, all the men are well over 6 feet. He is no exception as he towers over Calum.

"Please Momma. Please," Nikau begs, leaning against her legs.

"Okay, okay. But first," Harlowe says which earns a groan from Nik.

"If you say get ready for bed," he sighs.

"You have to get ready for bed." Nikau gives a big huff, almost folding his arms across his chest and then deciding against it. The fleeting glare of Harlowe's eyes makes him realize he can't. His mother is not the one to front on too much. "You have that field trip tomorrow and you have to be up early. It's kind of a long story. Since you asked, you're going to get the full version, uncut, director's cut."

"Okay!" Nikau runs out of the kitchen. Koha follows behind him- trying to get a hug before he leaves. Sissy follows behind the both of them. She's really the only one that has the energy to keep up with the energy of Nikau. Pepper's getting to the point where she trots around but doesn't have the get up like before. Jack was never the one to run around a lot. He got excited for the walks, for the treats, but overall is pretty healthy. But the age is clear in all of them

"Please tell me you're not going to give completely unedited version," Calum chuckles. "He may be too young for some of those details."

Esha gags next to Harlowe. "That's an image I'd like to erase from my mind."

"How you think you got here?" She asks with a laugh.

"A stork," Esha responds.

"If that's what you want to think, go for it." Harlowe is not going to be one the burst that bubble.

"Thanks for dinner, Mom," Koha says as he returns from upstairs, hugging me. He comes over every Sunday for dinner with us. Once he started working in welding and doing neon work, things took off for him. He had to fly with it. It was hard letting him go, her first baby to fly the coop.

"No need to thank me," Harlowe says softly, wrapping her arms tightly around him. She knows that she's holding on a tad too long when Calum starts rubbing her back. "Thirty more seconds," she laughs before releasing Te Koha.

Calum and Koha hugs before Esha gets hers. "How come you're not like this with me?" Calum asks in a whisper.

"Because I didn't birth you. I just married you," Harlowe says. "It was a privilege to marry. It's an honor to have kids." Calum laughs kissing her temple. She's right. He knows that down in bones. But he's glad to have that privilege. The dogs get their goodbyes too before Koha leaves.

Esha clings to Harlowe, head resting on her shoulder. "It's not the same without him here."

"You do have a whole other brother to annoy," Harlowe laughs, rubbing her back. She rests her head on top of Esha's. "But I get it. The house is shrinking."

"I know, but remember when we still lived in the States. I was painting and spilled the red all over your manuscript."

"Yes! I 'bout had a heart attack!"

Esha laughs. "But Koha took the blame for it but made me do his chores for a week. Even though I hated touching the trash, I did it because I was terrified."

"I knew you were the one that spilled it. He didn't even get in a lot of trouble."

"I figured that out later. But we got even because after we moved, I covered from him breaking the picture frame."

"I had no idea who broke that. It could've been either one of y'all," Harlowe laughs. "Thought it might've broken during the move."

"We didn't even ship any glass," Calum counters.

"You grow three kids and see how your mind ends up. You're lucky I still remember my own name," she huffs.

"Sometimes you don't," he snickers.

"You lucky Esha holding me back or else."

"Or else what? You're going to forget my name too," he taunts.

"I wish I could forget your name sometimes. Maybe I'd remember what I was going to say for a hot second."

"You too are disgustingly in love with each other and as much as this makes me want to vomit, this also makes me, like, envious," Esha states, shaking against her mother. She's still wrapped into Harlowe, tucked under her mother's arm. Part of her hopes she finds something like that. To be so disgusting in love with that it matters what no one else thinks about. She knows beneath all the taunts her mother would go through hell for Calum and her.

The two of them pile up onto the couch.  Harlowe passes through the living through to check on Nikau. Pepper lays near the front door, eyes watching. "Poor girl," Harlowe whispers. There are pictures of the chocolate lab mutt watching over Koha, who's fast asleep in the rocker. The two of them ran around the block.  Koha wanted to take her with him when he moved but his apartment building didn't allow dogs.

She's able to hand the distant a little bit better now. Harlowe knows it still hurts her heart every time he leaves. Koha talks about moving into a building that allows a dog. It's a bit more expensive though; Calum and Harlowe offered to cover the difference. He won't have it and Davon needs a better location for his work. So things are in a tough spot for the moment. "Pepper," Harlowe calls, paused at the stairs. She twitches her ears, but doesn't move. Esha settles down beside her, gently petting her.

Jack takes advantage of the empty space now and curls up with Calum. "You know the dogs shouldn't be up on the couch," Harlowe says to Calum.

"When have I ever listened to that rule."

"You're such a softie."

"Someone has to be with your hard-ass around." The only response is a roll of her eyes. She ascends the stairs. Much to her shock the bathroom door is closed. It opens though before she can close the distance.

"Turn to the left?" Nikau asks. After redoing the bathroom, there is still some things to get used too. Harlowe nods. He nods and then closes the door behind him again. She waits, then catches the rush of water hitting the tiles.

Back downstairs, she settles in next to Calum, placing Jack on her thighs. He seems very unbothered by her presence. However, after a few second's he walks into Calum's lap. He's always been a bit more keen to Calum. Calum taps away at his phone for a second. Before leaning over, a kiss pressed into Harlowe's temple. "I love you even if he doesn't."

Harlowe shakes her head, her laughter short and mostly silent. "I'm not offended." Esha's still consoling Pepper when Nikau finally descends the stairs, dressed in pj's. He takes over Jack's previous spot. "Now will I get the story?"

She plays at his tight corkscrew curls and nods. "So, many moons ago,"

Nikau interrupts. "How many moons?"

"That," Harlowe chuckles, squeezing his side a little, "is not important. It was many moons ago before we moved here, to Sydney. Papa Bear was living in LA, making music, getting all the girls," she teases.

Calum groans, burying his face in Harlowe's shoulder. "Do not fill my son's head with lies. She's lying Nik."

"It's not a lie," she shrieks. "You know girls were practically falling all over you."

"So what if they were, it's not important here," he returns.

"So you admit you had girls lining up for you?"

"Let's just say, I knew I had options." He grins. "But not one compared to you." His lips press into the crook of her neck. "I love you," Calum breathes as if the air is leaving his body for the last time.

With her hand, she taps his knee. "I love you too. But back to my story, Auntie and I went out to LA for a girl's trip. She had just finished her master's; I was still working retail in Virginia but was in the midst of looking at places to go to school for my first master's. She wasn't a partier, but I was. While walking around, looking for some bar that I wanted to go to, we ran across one that was having an open mic night. Auntie wanted to check it out; I wasn't sure about it. I figured we weren't having much luck my way, so why not?

"So we head inside; I order a drink. We're just listening, laughing, joking amongst ourselves. The announcer steps onto stage and notes that one performer couldn't make it, so they were going to open the stage up to anyone. I wasn't going to read anything. I was two drinks in by this point. I had hit a lull in writing and wasn't producing anything I felt particularly proud of; the stars did not feel too aligned for me. But she insisted, and insisted, and insisted. Finally, I get my hips out my seat and walk up to the mic. I can hear her cheering in the crowd, shouting my name, "Whoa, go Harlowe!'' She imitates in a quieter whisper, as the sound comes flooding back to her eardrums. Nikau watches the far way look taking over his mother's eyes. Her fingers are still brushing over his back but slowing.

"I get up and read a few pieces. It goes better than I anticipated though. What I hadn't realized is that someone in the crowd was particularly intrigued by me." Nikau looks across to Calum, raising his eyebrows at his dad. Calum returns the gesture with an added wink.  "I walked up to the bar to get another drink. The place is kind of packed, so it took a minute before anyone ever even saw me standing there. As I'm waiting to be seen, someone slides up next to me. I don't think much of it, maybe they're just ordering a drink too. So I wait for a moment and then they start talking to me. 'I really liked your work.'" Harlowe lowers her voice to imitate Calum's grovel and cadence. She fails of course. But it matters not how accurate she is. Calum laughs at the attempt. She continues on. "I have no clue who it is until I look up. Lo and behold, it is Calum freaking Hood, talking to me."

"Did you almost have a heart attack?" Nikau acts with a chuckle.

"I surely did! I knew who he was; I had listened to the band's music. But never in my twenty-four years did I think that I would run into him. I try to play it cool, ya know? I can't let him know that I'm freaking out on the inside."

"She failed horribly," Calum interjects.

"Are you telling the story or am I?" Harlowe asks. Calum holds his hands up in surrender. "I tried to play it cool, right. We talk for a little bit; I tell him I'm just visiting and a bunch of other stuff; he even pays for my drink. Such a gentleman. It's flirty, but nothing serious. I go back to the table where Auntie and I are sitting and we flip out. Our night is coming to a close and before we can stand from our table; Calum comes back over. I am flustered, thinking, What does the likes of him want with the likes of me? I wasn't anything special, just a girl looking to have some fun in the little three, four days I had out in California."

Calum speaks up again. "You were hot and clearly talented. I wanted a lot to do with you."

"Gross, Dad" Esha huffs. "That's just gross."

"What happened next?" Nikau asks.

"We exchanged numbers. He told me and I quote, 'Call me if you want to see more than just the flashing lights of LA.' And I knew exactly what he meant."

"And you fell for that, Mom? I am disappointed."

Harlowe laughs, looking over to see Esha with Pepper's head in her lap. "Let a hot guy with tattoos and a leather jacket approach you with the prettiest eyes you've ever seen, you'll fall for whatever bullshit that falls out of his mouth too."

"That's twenty-cent," she reprimands. The swear jar has long stood in the family but is never seriously used once the kids got older. "But just because he was in a band and famous doesn't mean you should've fallen for that line."

"What line should I have jumped his bones with then? "Hey, wanna come see my band" is that the line I should've fallen for?"

Esha scrunches up her face. "Okay, that just sounds pretentious. I'm so glad you didn't use that line, Dad. Kudos to you. But I still can't believe how easy it was."

Harlowe smiles. "Let someone with tattoos and a leather jacket come home with you. We'll test just how easy it is."

"Oh, that's so not fair. It's different now."

"Time may be different, but I assure you people are not."

Esha laughs, "So I totally shouldn't tell you all about Jen then."

"Oh we'd love to hear about Jen," Calum teases.

"Mom's story first," Nikau protests. "And then Esha."

"I've done it to myself," Esha says.

Harlowe continues on. "Now where was I? I called the next day. And well, that's kind of it. We became friends, of sorts. I wound up going to school out there too the next year. We dated, for a long time. Had Te Koha, got married, then Esha came along, moved to Sydney and then we had you. And now here we are."

"It can't be that simple," he pouts.

Calum reaches over. Nikau carefully climbs over Harlowe into Calum's lap. Jack curled up into his Calum's side long ago, freeing up his hands for the moment. "Me and your mom had our issues and fights. But at the end of the day, it all leads back to this, the five of us being a family, not including the dogs."

"It's hard to picture the two of you not being my parents. Or fighting. You guys don't fight. Like you get mad, but I've never seen a fight," he insists.

"I'm a lot mellower now," Harlowe says. "With Te Koha, it was way different. We were still working on other issues. It might not have always been the prettiest sight for him." She hopes Koha knows she'd take it all back. She'd redo everything if she knew then what she knows now.

Calum nudges her. "They're not shouting matches if I didn't yell back." There's a shit-eating grin on his face.

"I'm not perfect by any stretch of the imagination. But you aren't either."

He nods. "She's right," he addresses Nikau. "I wasn't perfect nearly 25 years ago, and I'm not perfect now. But I am better, so is she. Besides, we're too old and tired to argue anymore."

"Mom could probably argue in her sleep," Esha interrupts.

"Not proud of that," Harlowe admits. She's had to get better about voicing herself without yelling. A hard trait from her childhood having always felt like she was looked over. "But I'm much older. I've been a parent for a lot longer. That was hard being a first time parent and then your fiance is gone most of the day, or for months at a time. You almost feel like you're alone. It gets to you; I'm hard-headed and stubborn too like Papa Bear. He tried to get me to move here when we found out Esha was coming. But I was terrified. My parents couldn't really help being on the other side of the country; his parents were halfway across the globe. I was terrified of having to find work at a new university. After a year or two after Esha was born, I felt like I was going insane it felt like. I needed help, a lot of help. We tried therapist after therapist, eventually, I broke down. It was bad. I felt like such a horrible mom."

It hurts less now to admit that, Harlowe thinks. It's just the truth of the matter. The reality she was matched with.

"You're a good mom," Nikau counters.

"Thank you, baby. But I'm okay. It was just the truth of my situation. I'm better now. Besides, I ever tell you, you were a miracle baby."

He shakes his head. "No."

"Yeah, you are. I had a lot of problems when I was pregnant with Esha; delivery was an ordeal. Doctors told me it was a miracle that I lived, others were telling me I would never get pregnant again. It was a lot. I wanted three kids, so badly. So, so, so badly. It was rough, a lot of trips to the doctors. Eventually I just felt useless, unfit. When I finally broke down to Papa Bear in that bathtub, he knew he had to do something. We sold the house in LA, moved in a temporary place back on the east coast. My family helped me, but it was still kind of stressful. Eventually we moved here, found a therapist that was right for me.

"I was still fighting to see if I would have a third kid. Even the doctors here thought it was a coin toss. Nothing seemed to be working. I had truly given up hope. I was thankful and so happy for Koha and Esha, but it still hurt that I wouldn't have that third baby. I kinda stopped going to appointments; wasn't taken the medicine like I should've. Things had just gotten better but also worse. I thought I was pregnant at one point. But I just couldn't bear going to the doctor's for them to tell me it was all in my head. Grandma Joy dragged me to a doctor's appointment after rescheduling and rescheduling and putting it off. She kept telling me that something was happening if only I'd go to the doctors. I just didn't believe it."

"But she was right?" Esha asks.

Harlowe nods. "Of course she was, when isn't she? She asked the doctors to do an ultrasound; she seemed so nervous and excited. I was holding my breath. I was praying I had imagined anything. And then there you were, on the screen." She gently taps the end of Nik's nose. "Inside my belly. I cried, like bawling, sobbing. Snot running. Joy and I were a fucking mess. Calum walked in and I knew it was real. "

"Forty cents," Nik says sternly.

"Sir, yes, sir. I'll get right on that."

"I'm sorry you went through all that Momma." Nikau's cheeks are flushed with tears.

She kisses his forehead. "Don't be; it gave me you."

"Damn, now I'm crying," Esha huffs before walking over to Harlowe. She slides in next to her mother on the couch, head slotting in space between chest and shoulder.

"That's twenty cents, missy," Harlowe laughs. Sissy pops her head up. "Not you, baby. Not you."

"Does Te Koha know about this?" she asks.

"Yeah, he knows. He asked too many questions for us not to tell him," Calum offers with a laugh. The silence lingers for a while before it's broken.

"Esha your turn," Nik says.

She groans. Why did she open her big fat mouth? "She's just a friend right now."

"With tattoos and a leather jacket?" Harlowe asks. Esha can hear the tease dripping from the words.

"I reserve the right not to incriminate myself," she returns. To redirect from her embarrassment, Nikau suggests a movie. Everyone agrees. Harlowe knows that soon though, Nika will be fast asleep. Not before long, his head drops, startling him until he drops into Calum's chest.

"Out like a light," Calum whispers.

After the movie, Nikau's placed into bed. Esha heads out to a friend's house for a party. The house is silent. The dogs are sleep too. Harlowe falls across the bed, releasing a sigh. Calum lies across the mattress, arms draping across her. His torso is bare. She can see some of the tattoo on his ribcage. It's one of the old poems she wrote about him when they first started dating. He got it tattooed about a year ago. Fans have speculated what it is, but neither of them have confirmed it. There's no real need.She runs her fingers up his arms, tracing over the black ink. "You know you're an awesome mum right?" he asks in a whisper.

"I try. That's all I can do."

He finds her forehead, a stretch upwards before planting several kisses. "And you do very well. I'm so proud of you. So," he punctuates the word with a kiss. "So. So. Proud. I know it's not been easy, but with every battle you made it out on the other side."

"I had your help. You were there. You literally are the reason I'm still fucking alive. If you hadn't have moved us, I don't think I would still be walking this earth."

"You're strong. You still would be."

"Listen to me," she starts, sitting up, his arm falls to her lap. "I literally would not be right now in front of you. I felt so alone and so useless but you were there, the entire time. You helped me help myself and that honestly makes me so grateful to have you."

Tears are collecting on his lower lash line. "I saw your hurt; I saw your pain." He sniffles as she brushes the tears from his cheeks. "I had to do something. That's all I was thinking, I can't lose my wife. My kids can't lose their mother. I didn't care if I had to fight hell or high water; I was going to help you whatever way I could. I am so thankful to wake up next to you every day, even when you roast me and nag me. I'm just so grateful you are here. You could've left me 23 years ago. You should've left me; I was being such an asshole, cutting you off like that. But you fucking stayed. You stuck it out through harassment, online hate, rumors. God, the rumors," he sobs into her thighs.

"Sshh, it's okay." She knows what he's referring too. A lot of nasty comments were said when it got publicized that she was pregnant with Koha before any type of engagement or marriage. Calum proposed a few weeks later, after being nervous for months. A lot of people attacked them saying that he only proposed because he didn't want his children to have a broken home. That one tore him apart; he flew back at the comment with a huge paragraph about how much he loved Harlowe and wanted to do right by her. For some it worked, for others, even after decades of being together, they're not convinced.

"Breathe, baby." His shoulders shake beneath her fingertips. "Hey." She tries to coax him up. The cotton of her shorts become wet, her thighs damp with his tears. Her fingers gently scratch over his scalp and nape of this neck. "It's okay. I'm here. I'm right here."

It's a few minutes before Calum collects himself and sits up. She grabs the tissues for the nightstand and wipes his face and nose. "I cannot and will not let you slip through my fingers like that again."

Her focus is locked in on cleaning his face. But Harlowe nods. "I know. I believe you."

"Your shorts," he sighs.

"My shorts literally do not matter. C'mon." They walk into the bathroom. The water drips into the porcelain sink basin, and over the washcloth. He leans against the counter, fingers playing at the hem of her shirt. "I love you; I am in love with you. I am not going to stop love you. It's a choice I am happy to make over and over again."

"I love you too." Harlowe presses the damp cloth to his puffy cheeks. She has never and will never get over how much she can pinch and squeeze them. Right now is not the time though. She restrains herself. "I am in love with you. I have never stop loving you and will never. Even when you're dead and gone, I will love you and nag you for leaving me alone with three kids and three dogs!"

Calum pulls the damp washcloth from my hands and wraps his arms around my waist. "I give you every right to nag me when I'm dead. Though I can't promise I can defend myself." Calum spins us, so I'm up against the counter. He cleans her thighs.

"You do realize I've had piss, shit, blood, and vomit on me. Mother of three kids. Snot is the least of my worries."

"I know," he grins, tossing her a clean pair of shorts from inside the bedroom. "I really just wanted to see your ass jiggle as you change."

"All you have to do is ask. It's not like you have to make excuses anymore."

"It's more fun to make excuses."

Before stepping in the clean shorts, she makes a dramatic show of shaking her bottom in his face. Calum laughs. That's his wife. But he wouldn't have it any other way. It would be boring if she weren't the way she was, if she weren't so loud and boisterious. If she weren't willing to fight every instinct that tells her she's a bad mother. Calum realizes his life, while it tried and tested him, is full because his heart is full.

Harlowe struggles just a little to get the shorts up. Three kids have given Harlowe the hips of her mother, but she does her best to keep in shape. Her body before was long gone after Esha and after Nikau she hasn't bothered trying to chase the old photographs. She settles for just being healthy. That's all she needs to keep up with a 10-year-old now.

She was nervous though after having Te Koha that Calum wouldn't find her as attractive. Her skin had already started to sag just a little, the stretch marks lined her body aggressively. There was no hiding it. Sometimes there was shame, staring her in the mirror. It was shame telling her to she needed what was before. But Calum was always there, always a voice to break through the clouds.

"Let's watch Moana again," Calum suggests, arms encasing her waist. He walks them back to the bed, lips ghosting over the skin of her neck.

"If you fall asleep, I'm taking video and putting it on twitter. And it doesn't get deleted this time. Deal?"

"Deal." They climb into bed and she huddles into his side. Their family watches Moana or Black Panther as a pick me up movie. Koha and Esha were obsessed with Moana, especially after Calum surprised the kids by dressing up as Maui. Nikau was hooked after his first viewing. There are have many videos of Calum with the kids wrapped around him as he sings.

Barely half an hour into the movie, snores hit the air. She called it and with a shake of her head, she finds her phone. Calum, once a rock when he slept, has become more of a lighter sleeper since having the kids. She's grateful that reaching across to her nightstand doesn't wake up. With the camera trained on him, she films for a few seconds. The snores are clear as they escae him.  

Twitter is a hot buzz of activity. Her mentions are littered with her and Calum's handle. It's not unusual for the pair. But Harlowe can see something has happened. She only spends a few minutes to draft the tweet before scrolling the mass of tweets.

Calum's new twitter&insta bio are the fucking cutest, one user gushes. She clicks onto Calum's profile. It takes a second before the full profile loads. Bassist in 5 Seconds Of Summer. Dog father of 3. Human father of 3. Husband to Harlowe. "Speak--" Tears fill her vision for a second. His now matches her, for the most part. She avoided added his name when she said wife leaving it at the capital C. The thing that really gets her is the last part. It's part of the poem he tattooed onto his ribs. She wrote in a buzz, watching him and the band work one day.

They hadn't been officially dating. Though everyone called them the old people couple. It was a testament that still rings true for them. She told Calum that she felt like his soul was blue and not in a bad way. He just had a calming aura about him. He didn't talk a whole lot. But he did have things to say. He just always wanted to make sure that his words were properly together first before he spoke.

Harlowe wanted him to just speak. She watched the way his brows knitted together, his eyes flickering between Michael and Luke discussing the progression. It was like he wanted to say something but was holding it back. She rushed to grab a piece of scrap paper from the center table, amongst all the scribbles of their ideas. She grabbed Calum's pen from his hand and started writing. The letters were sloppy, too big and not fully formed. It slanted down the page because it lacked lines.

Calum was shocked by her sudden outburst, the pen being snatched from his hand. But he could see her wheels turning, how she couldn't get the words down fast enough. He didn't say anything. Harlowe just wanted to him to speak; she could feel the words he was not saying. She was feeling words that she couldn't say but wanted too. It overflowed onto three pages worth.

Harlowe's phone buzzes, snapping her back to reality. It's a text from Esha. Then another one comes through before it shakes with her contact photo lighting up the screen. "Is everything okay?" she asks. There's more panic in her voice than she likes.

Calum reaches out, awake when he heard the first text come through. He thought it was his phone.

"Nothing's wrong, Mom. Did you see Dad's new bios?" The background is loud. Her voice is just barely reaching over the receiver.

She exhales, squeezing Calum's hand. "I just did. Also, I didn't think you kept up with your old parents."

"I have to," she laughs. "I have to help keep you guys hip. But did you see his reply?"

"Reply to what?"

"He replied to someone, Ma. Go to his profile. Swipe to the left to see his tweets and replies. That hasn't changed in the decades twitter has been around."

"I'll check it. Do you need one of us to stay up and grab you after the party?"

"Mom, I'm like three blocks away. I'll be okay."

"Girl, does it-"

"Besides," she interrupts. "Madeline drove here and she's a few beers in. I took her car keys. I'll walk back with her."

"There's plenty of leftovers. If you text me before you leave, I can heat them up for you two."

"Okay. I'll be back by 1 at the latest. Love you."

"Love you too. Be safe and text me!" The call ends; Harlowe is sure Esha didn't hear her.

"Esha?" Calum questions.

Harlowe nods. "Madeline is spending the night, drunk I suspect. Also, you fell asleep. The video is already posted."

"Go figure."

"She called gushing about some twitter activity on your part." Harlowe swipes over, as instructed, to his replies tab. There it is, the recent reply that reads, Raising 3 kids, 3 dogs & keeping my wife happy was a lot more important than my social media. But I figured it was about time that I updated it.

Harlowe scrolls up to see the original tweet, It's been how long? And Calum finally remembered how to update his twitter bio.

Calum pretends to be interested on something on his phone when Harlowe looks up to him. She kneels on the bed, phone dropping to the mattress between then. Her lips are soft against his cheek, then his temple, and finally sealing over his lips. "Have I told you I love you today?"

"Once or twice," he grins. His kiss is short, though his hands travel to her thighs and squeeze. Blindly in their kiss, Calum sets his phone onto the nightstand next to his side. Harlowe straddles his waist, sinking slowly down onto his lap. The boxer briefs and cotton shorts are a thin barrier between them.

____

The house alarm beeps, calling out that the front door has opened. Calum is slow to move his hands away from Harlowe's heat. But she pushes at his bicep. "It's probably Esha."

"I never heard a text come in." His lips ghost over her collarbones.

"Well it sure as hell wasn't Nik sneaking out and back in."

Calum moves off her when she pushes at him again. The alarm clocks read an angry red 12:30.  There's no doubt Esha is not sober. Harlowe uses the bathroom first, door open. There is little need to close it because Calum comes in to wash his hands, gargling quickly with mouthwash.

"Alright, so good cop bad cop our drunk daughter and her friend or just good cop this?" he laughs. The answer is obvious but he knows his wife. She's worried because there was no text. Before sliding into underwear and robes, Calum stops Harlowe, her face already contorting.

"She made it home. That's all that matters."

"I know. I'm a worrywart."

"It's alright. You care." Listening from the top of the stair, the house fills with giggling and Esha shushing. As they descend Harlowe sees Madeline falling into Esha; Esha's using the wall to help take some of the weight off her.

"Sorry I didn't text," Esha sighs. Her eyes are a little glassy, but she doesn't seem too far gone. "I got too caught up in that last game of beer pong. But we fucking won!"

Harlowe hooks Madeline's other arm around her shoulders. "I'm proud. So naked lap for you guys?"

"Hi Mrs. Hood," Madeline giggles.

"No ma'am. You ain't raise a quitter," Esha says.

"Was Jen there?" Calum asks, working on heating up the leftovers for them.

"She left early," Esha pouts. There's a moments pause as both women settle Madeline into the chair. Esha collapses into the seat next to her. "She had an amazing perfume on. We need to go to the mall. I need it."

"Looks like it was a fun party," Harlowe laughs.

Esha rests her head against the wood of the table. "This is so cool. I thought I was melting for a second."

She's definitely drunker than Harlowe and Calum figured. But she's still mostly coherent. Always a good sign. Harlowe grabs both of them an extra tall glass and filling it up with water. "Drink up, girls. You're going to need it."

"Thanks, Mrs. Hood," Madeline giggles, bringing the glass to her lips. Esha stares at her glass for a moment before lifting it to her lips.

. "Good night girls," Calum states. "Be sure to drink some more water before calling it in."

"Your parents are so cute together," Madeline says, a tad loud. It carries up the stairs.

"Ssh! Nik's sleeping," Esha shushes. "But thanks. They're disgusting together sometimes."

"You only say that because you're jealous."

"It's all fun and cute until you see hickeys on your mom's neck and you know your dad put them there," she scoffs.

Calum laughs, too loudly. Harlowe ducks, arms pushed into Calum's back to get him into their bedroom. They might still be visible. Though it would be a miracle for either girl to notice their own hands right in front of them.  "You could've blown our cover," Harlowe reprimands. "You'd make a horrible spy."

"Good thing my job is to be a dad and not a spy."

"Did you ever sneak around behind your parents back? God, your sneak skills are terrible."

"Never had to, really."

"Count your blessings."

"I'm counting on a lot more," his voice drops as he pulls his shirt over his head.

"Yeah, Z's because I'm tired and you're a terrible spy."

As he turns around, Harlowe notices the scratch marks she left from earlier. "Z's it is then," he chuckles, settling onto the bed and patting the spot next to him.