#if you know me irl you didnt see this

[ikebanaka-art]

Another one for @cureofthenonesense and their Billford fic What Is HE Doing Here?

Ignore the even less than half assed background, this was an excuse to be horny about anatomy and lighting lol

[beautys-abomination]

I’m only slightly unhinged, I swear.

[rougepancake]

Hii! I was wondering if you could do a ‘stuck in the laundry machine’ scenario with Sabito x fem Reader? Thank you!! I’ve looked throughout your page and it’s great I love the explicit details!!

Stuck

Sabito x Afab!reader

Warnings: Bestie you get stuck in a dryer- Anyways- fingering, dub-con, slight degration (?), orgasm denial. Porn without the plot. Sabito is a bit of an ass. Minors and ageless blogs dni. All characters are legal dw.

Summary: You’re working on getting your laundry out of the dryer, but as you go to reach for the sock that’s stuck to the back, you realize there’s no escape. And you’re too embarrassed to call your boyfriend for help.

“Shit.” You sighed, giving up your attempts to free yourself from the dryer’s clutches. Who would’ve guessed that your dryer was as deep as it was? You sure as hell wouldn’t have that’s for sure.

You squirmed around some more, giving up once again when you hit your head on the side. “Ow- fUcK!”

Just then, you heard footsteps approaching you. “Hey babe are you o- OH MY GOD AHAHA!!!” Your caring boyfriend laughed loudly, mocking you for getting stuck in such a place. “How did you even manage that?!”

“I don’t wanna talk about it…” You mumbled, your face heating up.

“Imagine~” Sabito teased, leaning against the dryer so he could see your ass better.

You felt his eyes on you and begun kicking your legs wildly. “Quit staring! Are you gonna help me or not asshole?!” You heard him chuckle from behind you, then you felt his hands on your ass.

“Hold up babe… I wanna try something…” You could feel one of his hands move towards the hem of your shorts, slipping his fingers past it in an attempt to tease you further.

“Oh wow~ No underwear today hm?” He pulled down your shorts so fast that you barely had any time to protest, leaving you vulnerable. “Look at you, you’re so pretty.”

“You’re such a jerk.” You blushed, placing your hands over your face. “H-Hey!” You shouted as Sabito suddenly spread your legs apart, revealing your dripping cunt.

“Look at that.” You felt his warm breath on your lips, sending shivers throughout your body. “You look delicious…” He chuckled again, pulling his face away from you. “Too bad I’m not hungry.”

“B-But- aH~!” You were interrupted by the sudden feeling of Sabito’s finger sliding past your lips. “G-Give a little warning n-next time!”

“Next time? So you’re telling me you’re gonna get stuck in the dryer again?” He smirked, adding another finger as you squirmed helplessly.

“T-that’s not wHat I meant!” Your voice cracked harshly, followed by a loud moan of pleasure.

“Well what could you mean then, hmm?” He picked up his pace. “If there’s no next time then why say so?” You grinded onto his fingers, moaning hopelessly as your high grew closer and closer.

“S-Sabito~ I-I’m gonna c- ah~!” You whined incredibly loud, tears forming in your eyes. You heard Sabito chuckle again as he stopped moving entirely, pulling his fingers out from you. “P-Please! Babe please!” You cried hopelessly, your high slipping away from you as he sat there.

“Nah.” He smirked. “You can come get some more when you get out of the dryer.”

“W-What?” You panted.

“I can tell that you’re not really stuck, dummy.”

“W-WHAT?? I AM STUCK YOU ASS!”

“Oh shit.” He began to laugh, leaning against the dryer for support. “I can’t believe my genius of a girlfriend got stuck in the dryer!”

“Quit your laughing and help me out of here or else you’re sleeping on the damn couch!” You shouted, kicking your feet in an attempt to make your point.

“Yes ma’am!”

[freckleshine007]

Cringe is dead. Me as a pony.

[if-not-now-tell-me-when]

just diabetic things

when your pump is empty and you just don't want to get up to fill it. and you consider for a second just...not doing it. ever.

[shmothman]

Seven Minutes

Pairing: Vash the Stampede/Reader

Rating: Explicit (18+ only)

Words: 3283

Read on AO3

Summary: Traveling with the Humanoid Typhoon, you’ve gotten into your fair share of strange and awkward predicaments—but this one really takes the cake.

[sister-lucifer]

i have to regulate my senses somehow

[r41nb0wzzz]

need to learn to draw so I can draw all my favorite characters making out

[hii-hawaiiu]

Accidents

A/N: uhh this is my first fic so.. i apologize if it's shitty so please bear with me

might make a pt 2 if it goes well

to which jisung's can't skate for dear life's clumsy ass bumped into a girl.

or..

in which the reader hates when accidents happen to her except maybe it's not so bad after all?

Han Jisung x reader

[stat: currently going feral for him]

(you can actually imagine who ever you want since i dont mention han anywhere but i swear he'll eventually come out in pt.2)

Song - Paper rings by Taylor Swift

word count: 1.3k

“SHIT” Cussed out a boy on his way to let his (sorry) ass (not so) gracefully land on the ice. On his way falling he bumped into a speeding girl. She took a few steps back steadying herself.

Rotating facing the boy, daggers thrown against the nape of his head. All the murderous intentions vanished when she faced him, planting his ass on the ice letting his upper body fall on the ice. Clenching his hands moving it up and down as if he’s a little child throwing a tantrum. Chuckling lightly at his little tantrum she reached out her hand. The boy raised his head up, staring at the hand above him. He squinted, making out the face of a girl. the boy huffed in embarrassment and defeat reaching up for her hard.

Scoffing at her he stumbles his way up greeted by a series of snorts and chuckles. “I-it’s not funny!” He stuttered out of embarrassment. Looking down, ears and cheeks clearly red from their encounterment. Pulling on his hair as he screamed hiding his face in his hands facing up to see her, eyes shift everywhere except her eyes. Grinning at him widely “come on… it’s pretty funny” stomach hurting from hurling out of laughter cheeks hurting from smiling too long. 

Nevertheless, Jihyo [could only think of mother [stream killin’ me good]] saw that unexplainable and rare scenery of her younger sister talking to a person; a guy to be exact talking as if they’ve known each other for decades. She smiles to herself taking a picture of them together for err memories her friend came to her with a questioning glance she tilts her head towards them smiling at her friend.

“First time?” asked the girl after practically begging him to stop hiding his face and when he didn’t want to, she wrestled his arms, prying them away. Him; a complete stranger. “That obvious?” he blurted out with his dignity finally looking into her dark cold eyes lingering. It took him a moment to come back to his senses, clearing his throat as he settled his eyes on the icy floor.

She tilts her head sideways forming a small and light smile she brings her right arm in front of her chest shaking it sideways as a symbol of 50/50 as she scrunches her nose. The girl noticed a school of teenagers her age looking and pointing at them while whispering. “Your friends?” she pointed out straightening her back making her look extra taller than he is. “Yea actually, they dragged me here.” he chuckled out looking back at the memory. 

See, the boy has never liked the ice. His friends had always talked about it, but he always managed to chicken out. Nonetheless, this time his friends had a plan to drag him into the skating rink. Literally. Changbin eyed Chan urging him to take the upper half while he took his lower. Chan grabbed both his arms while Changbin grabbed his legs carrying him effortlessly as if he's some ragdoll. Stumbling on his shoes he cried out a pathetic help to the people in the mall (no one stopped to make sure he’s ok.)

“Want me to help you?” she offered softly, her voice sounds like music in his ears is what I would say if it were true which isn’t. She offered him in a low awkward voice twirling to show off her [basic] skating skills. She reached out her hand hoping he would take her offer. He stared at her hand not knowing what to do. So he ran. Well he wobbly skates away like a newborn penguin from her back to his friends. Scooting against the railing slowly even a snail on ice is way faster than he is. She sighed looking at the now empty space in front of her. She leaned her back onto the railing regretting what she did ‘well, that went well.’  She thought to herself having an internal pity party over someone she doesn’t know. And a guy for that matter could've been a girl could’ve been a cat but a boy? That was the last thing she would have ever expected. 

A boy bumped into her just as she was about to skate away, not just any boy that’s right it’s him. “Hey! Where are you going?” the boy rushed up onto his feet quickly holding her hand. “Come on! What are you waiting for? I don’t want to spend another second knowing that i’m gonna fall on my ass every time I take a step.” he took a slow and careful step forward repeating what she did before; holding his hand out for her to take which leaves the poor girl confused he just left her for his friends and now he came back? That question wrecked her brain. Nevertheless, she still took his hand.

The rest of the afternoon went on as a blur of laughter, jokes, silly questions and mostly falls. She took [more than] a couple of photos as a keepsake ignoring all his complaints. She felt happier and more alive than she had ever been in a long time. Losing track of time they both didn’t realize that the amazing time they had had come to an end rushing out of the rink and into the mall she had realized that she had known nothing about him, not even his name. She went back to the rink telling her sister she left something she ran as fast as her legs could take her. She was too late. He's gone. Nowhere to be found. She went out of the rink sulking when she saw her older sister waiting for her “got what you need?” Jihyo asked her clearly out of breath complaining how tired she is from running across the mall just to make sure she’s okay. That is what yn said when in reality she took all the time in the world and she even slowed her walking pace. Her little sister nodded clearly disappointed and tired [cause she RAN there to catch a BOY -that mind you- she knew nothing of].

[definitelynotarabbit]

New profoundly fucked up flavor of grief discovered after person realizes the emptiness they've been feeling for the past four years was the void left by their only local friend dying.

How the everliving fuck did I make it this far without processing that

A. She was my only local friend

B. She died

And mother fucking C. That she was my friend at all

Even more profoundly fucked up that it took seeing someone else ride her horse for this to domino effect it's way into existence

[pussyandpastries]

maybe i get invested in ships and fictional relationships because they (most of the time) get a happy ending together and are able to overcome obstacles and communicate (in the end) and this is very different from my real life experiences where relationships and pseudo-romantic encounters end with conflict

[uncle-chambo]

I really really need to kiss a girl. Or kms. I need to kiss a girl that could help me kms.

[shmothman]

Pairing: Vash the Stampede x Reader

Rating: Explicit (18+ only)

Words: 3321

Read on AO3

[toothbrushfingers]

humana humana awooga woof woof bark *eyes pop out*

[fatallyaddictedtofiction]

Postnote: a bit venty so Those Of You Who I Talk To pls just ignore this 👍

Hmmm i feel very disconnected from "society" / other people / the world because i didnt want to get involved in anything as a kid and now i dont understand anything and i feel like everyone else knows the Secret Rules of Life because i genuinely dont know anything important

Three months ago i could give an in depth analysis of supernatural but i couldnt tell you who Kier Stamer is (im british). Who tf is like that.

[elenagilbertbookversion]

I hate him but he's so beautiful i wanna kiss him so bad