#if you ever thought minesweeper was fun but it would be better with a dragon this game's for you (and me)

[oh-boy-me]

:0 could I have a beel,asmo,belphie,lucifer,mammon, satan (not including levi) and diavolo playing videogames? I thought it would be kinda funny since they're all really old- except for levi of course haha

Ohhh this should be fun!

Decided to do individual HCs for this one instead of a group thing so they wouldn’t be limited to multiplayer games.

Most of them, save for a certain prince, have been exposed to games a fair amount by proximity to Levi.

---

Lucifer:

Lucifer has a Mononoke Land account so that he’ll get the email notifications for events and can therefore keep track of Levi’s whereabouts.  He’s never played the game, though, nor downloaded the app, and he has no intention of doing so.

In general, he’s not much of a gamer.  The most gaming he gets done is minesweeper on Windows XP.  He doesn’t have the time, and it was never something he could get into.

That isn’t to say that he owns zero games, though.  His favorite genre is turn-based strategy, because he can afford to look away from them, and they make him think and plan.

He doesn’t like the hyper-realistic ones, though.  Things like Civilization and Here Be Dragons are up his alley, Hearts of Iron not so much.

He doesn’t care too much about the story, but a good soundtrack is mandatory.

Also he’s an old man so the controls also have to be intuitive or he just won’t be able to play.  Why is he jumping when he presses A he thought that was the attack button.

The type of player who needs to get every achievement.  A completionist.

When the group gets together for the rare multiplayer night, he has no idea what he’s doing and yet still manages to do well.  It’s kind of infuriating.

He won’t make alliances with anyone, no, it’s every man for himself.  He also actively targets Mammon no matter what game they’re playing.

The fact that he doesn’t really get it protects his pride when Levi inevitably wipes the floor with him.

Mammon:

Mammon actually does game a little bit in his spare time, mostly with Levi.  He’s got a couple consoles and is more open to different genres than Lucifer is.

He thrives in any game where the main goal is to rack up as many points or as much profit as possible.  He’s undefeated in tycoons and pinball.  (Tetris is an exception; he’s terrible at Tetris.  Stupid spacial recognition.)

The RNG elements boil down to his insane luck, but he’s actually very smart when it comes to investments and stuff, so it’s not like he’s only using his luck to get by.

If the games have multiplayer, even better!  Nothing like kicking Levi, MC and Belphie’s asses in a game of Fortune Street!

He also tends to like the action-focused games that Levi plays.  Not so much into turn-based RPGs, but he enjoys stuff where the enemies spawn, like in Zelda or Rune Factory.  And he’s great at button mashing in fighting games, although Levi, who actually knows how to play them, always beats him.

Mammon uses items as soon as he gets them, and is too busy rushing a boss to care about learning its patterns and strategizing.

Skips cutscenes even on his first run.  Levi and Satan hate him for it.

Like mentioned before, he gets an unfair disadvantage in game nights because everyone targets him.  Especially in those games with RNG, because otherwise he WILL win.

He’s banned from PTW games because he will indeed PTW.

Satan:

Satan is another one who doesn’t play too many games, and that might be for the best because he’s a nightmare to play with.

The sorest loser, and a pretty nasty winner too.  He insists on the hardest difficulty and then rage quits at the slightest inconvenience.

He will play when prompted, though; he’s not above hanging out with his brothers.  His favorite sorts of games are ones with a good story and/or good puzzles.  His planning is more on the tactics side, as opposed to Lucifer’s strategy, so he would love Fire Emblem.

He WILL drop a game if the story isn’t holding his attention, and he’s done so in the past.

Overly cautious and hoards resources.  He takes the safe route every time.

Also another completionist.

Beel would often ask Satan to help him find out which art pieces were originals and safe to buy in Animal Crossing, and Satan got a little bit interested and ended up making a resident on Beel’s cartridge so the donations could be in his name.  He went on a mini-campaign to drive out the residents he didn’t like, but one of them turned out to be Beel's favorite and he felt terrible about it for weeks.

During family game nights, everyone is always torn between appeasing Satan and telling him to deal with it when he loses.

He also gets angry if he catches on to the fact that they’re letting him win, though.

Probably a genwunner.

Asmodeus:

Asmo enjoys video games.  They don’t fit into his aesthetic so he’s never really tried to understand them, but he doesn’t dislike them by any means.

Gaming is becoming more mainstream though, right?  That’s a whole new audience that could appreciate him.  Maybe, just maybe, he can let himself be a bit of a geek.

Unsurprisingly, he’s got a penchant for games with customization options.  Surprisingly, he also really enjoys FPS games.  If he and Levi ever played at the same time, it would be chaos in the House of Lamentation.

As opposed to his in-your-face attitude, he likes to play sniper units.

He said he wants to tap into the gaming community, but he’s not very good at most of the games he plays so he’s too embarrassed to actually do so.  He does, however, play the Sims on livestream.  He does his best to make the steamiest and most dramatic scenarios happen, and he’ll hold strawpolls to let his viewers make some choices.

Asmo also plays Animal Crossing like a few other brothers, but his island is so well groomed and with just the right residents, it feels like you’re touring an uncanny dystopia and Asmo is the dictator.

When the group gets together, he usually ends up doing the worst.  He’s more interested in executing perfect combos than actually dealing damage, so he’s not aggressive enough to get anything done against players like Levi and Satan.

He’s also not very good at teamwork; he starts yelling at his partner very quickly.

Beelzebub:

Beel doesn’t have a lot of “gamer” in him, but some of his brothers seem to like it so he decided to give it a go.  Turns out his hands are too big, but he makes do.  Kind of.

You’d expect a sports game to be the best for him, since he’s so athletic.  However, it’s BECAUSE he’s so athletic that this sort of game isn’t in his library.  He gets too antsy and bored tapping buttons instead of actually playing the sport.

Beel’s also not an aggressive player in any sense of the word.  He feels guilty even hurting the most basic of slimes.

No, no games are better for Beel than the stress-free, casual life simulators.  Animal Crossing is no surprise his favorite one right now.  Satan handles the museum for him while Beel gets to do whatever he feels like in a world where the biggest threat is a wasp.

He’ll also play other low stakes games where living your life is the main goal, like Harvest Moon and Stardew Valley.  His big heart can never choose who to marry in those games.

Horror is also ok for him, because while aggression is hard for him, self-defense is not.

He got the Cooking Mama app on his D.D.D. and bit the device in half, so he’s not allowed to touch that franchise anymore.

When the gang meets up, his non-aggressive side sticks around.  In fighting games, he’s more likely to dodge and steer clear of the others, and in other versus games he’s so open to compromise you’d think you were on the same team.

Satan did get him his favorite resident back.

Belphegor:

Belphie probably games the second most after Levi; it’s something that keeps him entertained but doesn’t require him to move very much at all.

I actually have no idea how to describe his preferred genres, but League of Legends and Dark Souls is basically all you need to know.

League lets him socialize a bit, and it’s the game that he and Levi play together most often.  As for Dark Souls, he loves the sort of game where learning your opponent’s every move and outsmarting/outmaneuvering them is the only path to victory.

I guess that would be described as “really hard action-adventure” games?  He’d also like Sekiro.

He also has his own copy of Animal Crossing to visit and play with Beel, but his island is so underdeveloped you’d think he started that same week.

Belphie is the true wild card of family game nights; sometimes he sleeps through the whole thing, while other times he can take down even Levi.

He has everyone’s habits down to a T--Mammon charges in, Asmo does too much setup, Levi’s overconfident--and he knows how to counter each and every one of them.

For someone who’s so much of a cunning player, though, he also misclicks a lot.

He’s the most likely out of his brothers to make alliances.  He’s also the most likely to break alliances.

If he doesn’t think he can win, he’ll choose a player and start sabotaging the game in their favor.

Diavolo:

Lord Diavolo had read about like, Mario?  The little blue hedgehog guy?  But he’d never owned a gaming console before.  He probably thought Neopets was peak gaming.

Levi swore to fix this grievous error, and this was also a mistake, because now Diavolo keeps trying to get Lucifer to play all these hack and slash games with him.

He has legitimately told Lucifer that “if you don’t play Devil May Cry with me THIS devil may cry!”

The games need to always have something happening in them or he’ll get bored, kind of like Satan’s need for a good story, except with action.

It’s also worth mentioning that “play a game with Diavolo” actually means “sit in the same room as Diavolo while he plays.”

And oh boy… is he terrible at these games.

He just button mashes until either he dies or all the enemies die.

Never uses any of the items he gets because he’s sure he’ll need them more later on.  When, Diavolo?  During the staff roll?

Will bomb a door before trying the knob.

Since he’s usually only around Lucifer, who doesn’t want to get sucked into this, and Barbatos, who honestly couldn’t care less about this, he’s been left alone and free to develop these terrible gaming habits.

It’s rare that he comes to family gaming night.  Legend has it that Lucifer’s piercing glare is somehow connected to the fact that his brothers always let Diavolo win.

Masterlist

[redphienix]

Promotin’ my game blog because I feel like it :)

@retphienix​

is a blog I’ve run for 5 years as a poor man’s letsplay/liveblog platform and if you’re looking for bizarre haphazard liveblog game posts, bad opinions, analysis of things you don’t care about, and a way to make me a mild dash of endorphins through clicking a button- you can follow that blog :)

In order to give a semi-relevant display of what the blog is like I figured I’d share a few pics and captions from the past year (2020). Spoilers avoided, which sucks because I wanted to share moments that made me cry but that sounds rude for a promote post to do lol.

This post is long, press J on your keyboard to skip it or curse me out in an ask if you’re on mobile.

I am LOVING how strong the orders are for taking out tanks. Being able to take down a light tank with just a scout so consistently is wild. (Valkyria Chronicles)

(This game made me cry and was such a visual treat with its watercolor artstyle)

This is a very very good bug. (Hollow Knight)

(Hollow Knight is an amazing game, through and through!)

NINJAS.

CAN NOT USE.

SNEAK. ATTACK. (Tactics Ogre: Let Us Cling Together)

(I spent most of this playthrough noting weaknesses this game had in comparison to the spiritual successor Final Fantasy Tactics, but I ALSO pushed a guy off a cliff to win a fight so it has its ups and downs for certain)

Did some REAL gaming. Including winning I think my very first game of minesweeper ever because I haven’t played it since I was a kid and I never learned how as a kid? (System Shock 2)

(I beat the final boss by jumping in place)

Feeding pixel pups is always rewarding. (Fallout 2)

(Fallout 2 WAS very fun, but mostly it made me realize just how much I loved Fallout 1.)

Alright!

Screw everything else about this game.

I’m beating it with this on.

Bowser is getting bopped by Bippo the clown and I will overcome any obstacle to make that happen. (Super Mario Odyssey)

(SMO is a lot of fun and it added so much bright and colorful vistas to my switch, I loved that)

I love him, SO MUCH (Dragon Quest XI)

(SERENA IS PERFECT AND THIS GAME MADE ME CRY AND IT MADE ME THINK AND IT’S SO MUCH BETTER THAN I THOUGHT IT WOULD BE.)

That’s a GNOME? (Lost Magic)

(This was an interesting playthrough mostly to see exactly where this game from my childhood succeeded and failed. It’s not the best game, but it’s interesting, and gimmicky as HECK.)

You KNOW I repeated the time honored tradition of throwing yen by the bucket-full into the prize grabber. I just had to get this french bulldog! (Yakuza 4)

(Yakuza games come by the blog semi-frequently. 4 was alright, it had faults that bothered me, and it’s my least favorite currently, but it was alright.)

 And that’s just some 2020 stuff, the blog has tackled a LOT over the years and it’s been good fun. Maybe some day I’ll evolve the blog into another site’s format of content, but for now I’ve just been enjoying posting clips, pics, and gifs with some thoughts below good old tumblr live blog style.

[gman-003]

Skyward Sword play log excerpts

Oh hey, guess who’s still alive? I kind of got sucked into a vortex of freelance projects and moving, and I had completely no time to work on this. I didn’t even queue up the stuff I’d pre-written, things were so hectic. But it seems to be stabilizing now, more or less. I’m not going to try to commit to a schedule yet but I’ll still update on a Tuesday when I do.

While playing, I kept a log of thoughts and experiences, to aid the writing process. Since I'm in the middle of playing, I tend to write in an abbreviated, stream-of-consciousness style. Sometimes it turns out kind of funny. I thought I'd go ahead and share some of the better bits.

And then I swear we are DONE with this fucking game and I’ll be posting about Minish Cap next.

Side note: start with six hearts? wtf worst zelda ever

Six notes in and I'm already declaring it the worst game in the series. I am the *best* at games criticism.

Do the Loftwings not get names? Very bad writing to say "you have a close bond" with a nameless bird. Even just "Crimson" would have been something.

I continued to refer to Link's Loftwing as "Crimson" throughout my notes, because seriously, why don't they have names, if they're supposed to be so important? And why couldn't you just let the player pick a name, the way you could name your horse in earlier games. I judged this complaint too trivial to waste time expounding on, but still, it bugged me.

The idea of a sentient spirit embedded in the Master Sword (this isn't the Master Sword yet but I'll be fucked sideways if the game doesn't end up with that happening) is cool

I also don't filter out my profanity when jotting down notes. "Fucked sideways" is an abbreviated form of "fucked with a sideways rake", which doesn't actually make much more sense, come to think of it. I'm not sure what axis you rotate it on to go sideways...

An invisible voice (a new one this time) tells me to hit it with a skyward strike. I initially thought this was a blatant trap to release some ancient evil, and tried to find ways to bypass it but no, that's actually what you're supposed to do.

Seriously, I thought hammering the sealing spike home was a trap to release an unspeakable horror that would form the rest of the game, and was looking for a sneaky way around it for a secret ending. Nope. You're supposed to listen to the invisible voices. That's practically the moral of *Skyward Sword*, since Zelda also triumphs through the power of listening to invisible voices.

minesweeper in a zelda game? I was not ready. Or actually I was. Perfect beginner game on third try, moved on.

Do not ask how I got to be so good at Minesweeper. It would ruin my hardcore-gamer cred. I'm just naturally good at logic puzzles - that's my story and I'm sticking to it.

game stubbornly continues to give me rupees (full wallet) instead of hearts (1/2 heart left)

You'd think eleven thousand words complaining about a single Zelda game would be enough, but no, I had to cut a lot.

technoblins are constantly blocking me. checking strategy guide for how to not get blocked. Strategy guide useless

This would not be the last time the strategy guide lied to me.

woo vent crawling. expect headcrabs?

wtf groose you live in the sky how do you not know what BIRDS are

 so impa's an angel now. and also gandalf

fucking water temple

This will likely not be the last time this phrase makes an appearance.

Tentalus is supposed to look scary? It looks like a plastic toy teenage girls attach to their cell phones

hey ghirahim, all you had to do to find the second time gate was follow Link stealth-like and wait for Fi to remind him

A lot of game villains would do well to spy on the hero and overhear their advisor characters telling them exactly what to do.

wasn't hyrule polytheistic?

Seriously, can someone make sense of Hyrulian theology? Is Hylia a higher or lower goddess than Farore/Nayru/Din? How is she supposed to fit into the creation myth? If the Hyrulians have a race-specific guardian deity, do the other races have the same? THESE ARE THE QUESTIONS WE WANT ANSWERED.

obligatory zelda tennis boss

Again, we'll probably see this note in pretty much every play log.

tadtone (eugh) search goddammit it's not even a search, it's a bunch of "solve my maze" bullshit

Superman 64 is my go-to reference for this particularly stupid and annoying minigame archetype. Does anyone like it when a game puts the fun on hold and makes you literally jump through hoops?

Oh sure THIS GUY recognizes me as a hero right off the bat, no stupid PROVE THY WORTH quest

I don't remember exactly who THAT GUY was. One of the dragons, probably.

LD-Link-16 start your theories

In reference to a robot in the mines section, near the dragon. But I never actually came up with a good theory for this, although it *is* evidence of prior Links in the timeline, which implies *Skyward Sword* isn't the first one.