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maelancoli · 1 month ago
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Adding Tension After the Ship Happens
i feel a lot of slow burn ships lose steam after the characters finally get together, whether it's just from sleeping together or them actually engaging in a relationship, so here are some ideas for how to maintain steam.
their problems are not solved now that they've crossed the thresh hold
first things first, the plot itself i'm sure has other details than just their relationship. even the most fluffy of fluff has other things going on than kisses and giggles. don't abandon these details once the relationship truly begins. and if there was any kind of unresolved tension point or previously mentioned ex/trauma/insecurity/fear bring it back! bring things back around that might put a strain on a new, tender relationship. this can either make them have problems or be a way to develop their bonds and *show* it in action. any of these foreshadowing/resurrected points can be added in edits if you didn't start out with them or with retconning if you're writing rp/fanfic. all the writers do it. we see it in tv everyday it's ok if u gotta pull a rabbit from a hat.
their relationship will not be suddenly smooth and solid as if they have been married 20 years
okay they kissed/fucked/agreed to be together. now what? what circumstances kept them from getting there sooner? are those circumstances still present and how will they deal with it as a team? you also don't have to have characters officially together once they've done something physical. there is still discussion to be had and boundaries/expectations to establish. those conversations could be interesting to explore. and, even more-so, this is the perfect point for plot to happen and keep them from being able to have those conversations when they should. you can add angst, you can add miscommunication, you can add anything that tickles your fancy. especially a perfect time to have an ex return to cause some tension and uncertainty if they haven't made it official. they don't know what they are yet and that uncertainty is a delicious point to write it and really give the characters a hard time
utilize the main plot's tension
again, if you're writing more than just a contemporary fluffy romance, the romance should enrich the main plot. the romance as a subplot should be a component which merges with the main storyline and does not take away from it. if you don't want to milk the will-they-won't-they anymore than you already have it's time to build the relationship up in the midst of OUTSIDE conflict. let them disagree about how to resolve problems. let them butt heads. let them be scared and do and say stupid shit because they're scared. let them be worried or angry or frustrated and have to figure out how to balance their newfound vulnerability with who they are and were before that point. let them hurt each other a little so they can come back together stronger.
utilize the characters around them
if it is a plot which is mainly romance filled, then think about the tension from the lives around them. think about their loved ones and how their own issues could influence the plot points the characters have to face together. this could be a time for them to be introduced to loved ones. you could throw in a group trip with silly mishaps and shenanigans. you could even have loved ones try to break them up or doubt the love interest. navigating new relationships while also dealing with friends and family can be a source of plot and tension in and of itself. this can be a point to let love interests reassure each other and prove their salt. it can help them grow closer. it can be the heroic moment for one of them to stick up for the other or prove they're there for them no matter what.
overall if you're struggling with what to do after the slow burn feels like it's sizzling out it's time to zoom out. make sure you are not losing the whole picture of their environment or steamrolling past the real development of new relationships.
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baldval · 7 months ago
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heyy! You dont have to do this if it makes you uncomfortable it is a little darker…
can i request overlords finding out that reader selfharms? Like they knew she was unstable but they didnt think that much
thank you!!!
BEING COMFORTED BY HAZBIN!₊˚⊹♡
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characters: alastor, vox, velvette, valentino, lucifer, adam
warnings: sad reader, slightly ooc adam (that man is so hard to write omg)
a/n: ik i said i'm comfortable w darker asks, i just don't really feel ok w writing about such heavy/negative topics (especially sh), but don't worry anon, should've added that mb. anyways, i give you hazbin characters comforting reader in return 🫶🫶
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ALASTOR:
ᯓ he’s not exactly a ‘sit down and talk about feelings’ type of person
ᯓ but he can tell when something’s wrong
ᯓ and he wants nothing more but to make you feel like you’re on top of the world
ᯓ he sees your pouty face when you get home
ᯓ “hey, darling, come look,” he says
ᯓ he’d been at work when you’d left
ᯓ so he’s had some time to figure out what to do for you without making it seem like he’s prying
ᯓ he’ll ask you about what’s bothering you once you’ve relaxed
ᯓ he plops down on the couch, dragging you with him
ᯓ your favorite movie is paused on the tv, waiting to be played
ᯓ “i found an extended version. with bloopers and deleted scenes and everything,” he murmurs
ᯓ the entire movie, his hand is rubbing up and down your back
ᯓ his fingers sometimes creep up your neck, playing gently with your hair
ᯓ the entire thing is extremely soothing
ᯓ you know he knows something’s wrong
ᯓ and you also know he’s going to do everything in his power to fix it
ᯓ and you’re so grateful he just loves you
VOX:
ᯓ he doesn’t need you to say anything, ever
ᯓ he just knows what you need
ᯓ when he comes home and finds you in bed early, he knows you’ve had a difficult day
ᯓ he doesn’t know what happened, but he won’t ask until you’re feeling better
ᯓ he changes out of his work clothes and just gets into bed with you
ᯓ when you don’t say anything either, he pulls you into a cuddle, one hand pressing your head to his chest and the other cupping your hip
ᯓ “hi, vox.”
ᯓ he peppers your face in kisses
ᯓ “feeling off?” he asks
ᯓ you nod
ᯓ his fingers go to stroke your jaw
ᯓ “you can talk to me, you know. i want to make it better,” he tells you
ᯓ so you tell him everything
ᯓ whatever the issue was, the next day, he’s found some way to solve it
ᯓ just for you
ᯓ anything for you
VELVETTE:
ᯓ the minute you come home from work, exhaustion and misery rolling off of you in waves, she demands to know what’s wrong
ᯓ “is someone bothering you? is it your boss again? because i can get him fired.”
ᯓ you tell her everything
ᯓ she promises to help you with whatever it is that’s causing you trouble
ᯓ she’d tip the earth off it’s axis if you asked
ᯓ “come here, i want a kiss,” she tells you
ᯓ you very happily oblige
ᯓ she spends the entire night just spoiling (and worshiping) you
ᯓ the sheets of your bed are tangled between both your legs
ᯓ you’ve never felt more loved
ᯓ she murmurs about how your aniversary is coming up
ᯓ and tells you to get your nails done and dress pretty
ᯓ you don’t really know how you got here
ᯓ but you’re not upset
ᯓ you smile up at the ceiling, delightedly dazed
ᯓ you don’t even remember why you were upset
VALENTINO:
ᯓ he feels what you feel
ᯓ and at this point he can never leave you alone
ᯓ he NEEDS to be with you 24/7
ᯓ so naturally it’s like he’s dying when you come home looking upset
ᯓ “hey, no kiss hello?” he whines
ᯓ that manages to get you to laugh
ᯓ he smiles at your smiling
ᯓ you go over to kiss him and he catches your wrist before you walk off
ᯓ “no, c’mere,” he insists
ᯓ he tugs you into his lap and winds his arms around your waist
ᯓ he sets his chin on your shoulder
ᯓ “why’re you upset?”
ᯓ “oh, it’s nothing, val.”
ᯓ “bullshit.”
ᯓ you spill
ᯓ he rubs circles into your hip bone
ᯓ “i’d be upset, too,” he admits
ᯓ he kisses all up your neck
ᯓ “but we don’t have to think about that at all now. can we just spend some time together? i promise, though, if you’re still having problems i’ll gladly fuck up as many lives as you need.”
ᯓ you laugh, making him laugh
ᯓ you spend the rest of the night just sitting there talking to him
LUCIFER:
ᯓ the two of you are watching your current show, as you do every night, and he notices you’re zoning out
ᯓ he pauses it and looks down at you
ᯓ he dots a couple kisses over your brow
ᯓ “everything okay?”
ᯓ “rough day…”
ᯓ “why didn’t you tell me?”
ᯓ his expression is one of concern now, yet still absolutely laden with affection
ᯓ “i’m sorry, i’m not trying to keeping things from you or anything. i just don’t want to bother you.”
ᯓ “i want you to bother me. say everything that comes into your brain, i want to hear it.”
ᯓ he pulls you closer, palm smoothing over the back of your neck as he sets your head against his chest
ᯓ you tell him about your day, and how you were getting so frustrated
ᯓ frustrated everything was going wrong today, frustrated that the entire week was going wrong
ᯓ he listens intently, stroking your hair the entire time
ᯓ he gives soft “mhms” and “of courses” at your words
ᯓ he peppers warm kisses all over your face
ᯓ he does his best to give you a solution
ᯓ even if what he suggested doesn’t work, he’s sending you flowers to your house for the next week
ADAM:
ᯓ he’s a little confused, but he’s got the spirit
ᯓ he’s a little nervous to ask what’s wrong
ᯓ he’s afraid he won’t know what to do to make you feel better
ᯓ “hey, uh, everything okay?”
ᯓ you shrug
ᯓ “wanna talk about it?”
ᯓ you tell him everything
ᯓ he nods the entire time, his eyes never leaving your face
ᯓ he’s trying to memorize everything you’re saying
ᯓ he doesn’t really have any great solutions
ᯓ and he kind of hates himself for it
ᯓ he wants to help you, even if he doesn't make it obvious
ᯓ “hey, how about we go out tonight? take your mind off things.”
ᯓ you spend the night at dinner then wandering through a night market
ᯓ you both talk nonstop
ᯓ he gets you a bunch of trinkets
ᯓ just things that remind him of you
ᯓ and a bracelet, too
ᯓ he spends a bit of time fiddling with the clasp, eventually hooking it together and letting it sit on your wrist
ᯓ you don’t take the bracelet off
ᯓ ever
ᯓ at home, he’s worried you’re still upset
ᯓ but you’re not
ᯓ you fall asleep curled up against him, your worries now nonexistent
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lovrre · 6 months ago
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Agreement Prt2
I wrote half of this to Need by pinegrove ♫
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Art Donaldson x fem black reader
Prt1 here
Word count: 3k
Warnings: smuttt,unprotected sex, creampie,slight breeding kink if you squint. cursing (ofc) slightly domestic relationship (not with Art)and probably some other stuff.
Summary: Despite being engaged to one of the top and richest tennis players in the US, you feel unfulfilled. But everything changes when you transfer schools and meet Art Donaldson, who just can’t quit you.
Author note: I’m so glad I finished I was scared I wasn’t, but your comments gave gave me motivation. Thank you pookies 🫦 I like this one a lot more than the first one. Arts also very obsessed and in love in this one.
After twenty minutes, you finish your meal, alone. You decide to leave through a back exit to avoid the paparazzi waiting outside the hotel entrance. You stumble upon a narrow hallway and carefully make your way out, trying not to attract any attention. When you reach the entrance of the restaurant, you open the door and are greeted by a charming and seemingly empty establishment. The cozy yellow lighting, old pictures, and paintings on the walls, along with the white tablecloths and wooden woven chairs, remind you of an old Italian restaurant you and Art used to go to. You see moving in your peripheral and catch a glimpse of familiar golden locks.
You walk closer to see Art and Patrick sitting at a small square table with a vacant seat, you assume is reserved for you. Patrick with a full plate of food and Art without. "Patrick?" You question, your voice filled with suspicion as you creep towards the table. He looks back at the sound of your In voice, a smile forming on his face as he stands up, “What the hell are you doing here?” You ask, taken aback going in for a hug. Patrick returns it with a laugh before releasing from the hug slightly to look at Art.
“Ask him” You look between them confused. “I asked him to come here” Art states, adjusting in his seat. “Why?“ you ask clearly confused with the situation, “someone could see” you add your gripping the back of your chair almost afraid to sit down. “I bought the place out for an hour, it’s just us” Art reveals looking up at you. “You what?” you exclaim, a bit louder than you intended.
“I’ll explain everything in a minute, just sit” Art laughs, gesturing for you to sit down. You let out a sigh, reluctantly pulling out your chair. “Ok tell me what is going on” you say, slightly impatient. “We’ve got a plan for your marriage situation”, Patrick says, mixing his ice tea with his straw. “A plan?” you repeat, still confused. "Yes, a plan," Art confirms with a nod. Patrick takes a quick sip of his tea before opening a tan folder that he hadn't noticed before. “The private investigator dropped these off at the dorm the other day”, Patrick says, pushing the open folder towards you.
Inside were pictures of your fiancée , kissing all types of women. The worst part is, it was so obvious, he didn’t have a care in the world, every photo taken on different days in different settings. Outside, inside in the morning and at night, all different women.
You knew you shouldn't be upset, but you were, not because he was seeing other people behind your back, shit you were doing that same with Art, but it was the fact he acted holier than thou. That he continued to try and control you while actively putting your agreement at risk. “Wow…” you mutter.
Shuffling through the photos. “That’s not even all of them” Art says.
“Yeah… I accidentally left the other ones, but these are the most important ones. There’s also some paperwork underneath with names, time stamps and dates on stuff” Patrick ads. “How isn’t this everywhere?” You ask, furrowing your brow. “The investigator thinks he’s been paying them off,” Patrick says, taking a sip of his drink.
"Not that I don't want you here, but couldn't you just have faxed these over?" you ask, raising an eyebrow.
"Well, yeah... but then I'd miss the match," Patrick says with a grin, taking a bite of his food. "Plus, I would never miss an opportunity to help my best buds."
"Okay, so what are we doing with these?" you ask, holding up the pictures in confusion.
"We're going to spin it," Patrick replies, still chewing his food. "My plan," Art reminds him, "my bad," Patrick laughs, still chewing his food. You couldn’t help but smile, you’d missed the three of you together.
"We're going to spin it," Art repeats, making you smile wider. "Is this why you're training with my father?" you interject . Art nods in response. "Why didn't you tell me any of this last night?"
Art didn't say anything, a knowing smile spread across his face. Patrick looks between the two of you "freaks," he jokes, "Anyway... how do you plan on spinning it?" You ask, ignoring his comment.
“We lean into the infidelity, take a couple of photos of you crying, the two of you arguing, or something like that release them”, Art explains confidently.
“But… I don’t see how this stops us from getting married, it’ll just look like I got cheated on,” you say, scrunching your brow.
“We’re hoping this, plus me winning today, will be enough to persuade the media against him?”
“You believe you can win?”
“I do,” he nodded.
“Okay… I’m down.”
“Told you,” Patrick added, still drinking his tea.
“Are you especially thirsty or something today?” you ask, tilting your head slightly watching him slurp down his tea. A second one untouched, waiting for him.
“I am actually, thank you for noticing,” Patrick says with a big smile before taking another sip.
You notice Art's eyes drop to Patrick’s plate for a second time while you two are talking.

“You should eat.”

“What?” Patrick says, looking between the two of you who seemed to be having your own conversation. 

“No, I’m okay,” Art says, shaking his head.

“Mike had French toast for breakfast, I think you could have-“ you cut yourself off, looking down at Patrick’s plate. “Egg and sausage.”

“You guys aren’t talking about my food?” Patrick asks, slightly disturbed by your conversation.

“Patrick, I can buy you some more damn eggs,” you assure him as Art pulls the plate from under him.

“What just happened?” Patrick asked, looking around confused with no food in front of him.

Your phone rings, and you look down to see who it is. “It’s my Dad,” you inform, excusing yourself you answering the phone as you walk out of earshot.

The two of them watch your backside as you walk away. “She still looks good”, Patrick bites his lip, leaning over to Art.


“Careful, ” Art warns.


“What? you guys can joke about but I can’t?”


“Exactly”, Art laughs, plucking him on the head.
~~~~
With a dig, the elevator door opens, releasing you to your floor. You walk to your room, opening the door with your key card. Mike is packing stuff away in his duffle bag, getting ready to see your father. You don’t acknowledge him walking past him into the bedroom,leaving the door open. You sit on the edge of the bed carefully taking off your heals, you stand up and unzip the back of your dress with ease. The dress gracefully falls into a pile at your feet leaving you in only your underwear. You step over your dress and begin looking through your suitcase located in the closet. The sound of footsteps causes you to look up to see Mike in the doorway watching you.


“Where are you going?” Mike asked, leaning on the door frame slightly. You don’t answer right away looking for your dress under your neatly folded clothes. “There’s a press meeting with Art Donaldson's team, My Dad thought it’d look good if I’d came ” you say, moving more clothes around. “You didn’t come to mine” Mike states still watching you search.

“You didn’t ask me to” you responded, pulling out a light pink dress from your suitcase. There’s a beat of silence as Mike watches your actions "and you need to change for this press meeting?” Mike asks, raising an eyebrow. "No, but I want to” you say, standing up. When you see mike's eyes roaming up and down your body, you suddenly remembered you were only in your underwear. 


“Can you turn around or something” you ask, scrunching your face up in disgust. “I’ve seen more than this” Mike chuckles before obliging and turning around. You roll your eyes by stepping into your dress. “I’m sorry for how I acted this morning, I’m just stressed,” he admits.

" Really?," you hum, pulling up the straps of your dress.

"I don't want to be that guy," Mike responds, still facing away.

"But you are constantly being that guy..." you mumble, but Mike hears you. 

"I won't anymore. I want this marriage to work y/n, I.”


You release a heavy sigh at his word. “You can turn around now ” You announce zipping up the side of your dress. Mike turns around and watches as you sit back on the edge of the bed putting on your heels. “You’re still going to that thing?” Mike asks with a confused expression. “What about that conversation gave off the vibe that I was no longer going?” You say pulling your stiletto over your heel.


Mike goes silently for a moment watching you walk toward the bathroom. “Like you need more makeup?” Mike scoffs. “Be honest with me are you fucking him?” He asks from behind you in the doorway while you remove a bit of smudged lipstick. “are you serious right now?” You ask staring at him through the reflection in the mirror. “I’m not a fucking idiot, I saw the way you looked at each other, and I get the feeling that’s wasn’t your first time meeting” 


“Only god knows what you’re doing at that college” you can’t stop your self from laughing. “I think you’re projecting” you say walking past him towards the door, picking up your purse on the way. “Where the fuck are you going?” Mike calls out, following you. 

You swing the door open and step out into the hallway. Mike trails behind and tries to grab your arm to pull you back inside. “DONT TOUCH ME!” You yell yanking your arm back. “C’mon Don’t make a scene” Mike says looking around. 


“You have some fucking nerve, you know that? Your friend Isabel came up here earlier looking for you, I’m guessing you guys have a lot of fun In Detroit” you say with a smile. “When were you in Detroit again…my birthday? You ask rhetorically, Mike goes silent for a moment before responding.
 "I don't know what you're talking about," he says, trying to keep his voice down. "You don't?" you question. "What about Sarah, Kim, Kate, Alex? Do you not know them either?" Mike opens his mouth, then closes it. "Yeah…" you drawl, 


"they meant nothing to me... I just needed to get it out of my system before fully committing. I want this to work, I want this to be real, y/n," Mike says, trying to corner against the door in a situation similar to the one you were in with Art last night.
"That's the dumbest shit I've ever heard," you respond, attempting to push past him. He grabs you again using his strength. You had forgotten how strong he actually was. “Last warning” you say looking up at Mike. he can tell by the look in your eyes you’re serious, he doesn’t know exactly what you’re going to do but something in his gut said don’t test it. “Let. Go” you repeat one more time before a voice interrupts you.
“Is everything ok?” Patrick asked from the end of the hallway. "Yeah, everything's fine," Mike reassured with a smile, gently releasing his grip on him. "We'll continue this conversation later," Mike says, forcing a tight-lipped smile as he presses the elevator button. "No, we won't," you smile back with a wave, as the elevator door chimes and he leaves. "Are you okay?" Patrick asks, walking up to you. "Yeah, he wasn’t going to hit me, he knows better," you laugh. "I was actually more concerned about you hitting him," Patrick jokes.
“I got the picture though” he smiles, showing you a camera and clicking through the images of your altercation with Mike.”These are good, you should take them now, I’ll call Art and tell him I’m on the way” you say, pulling out your phone.
“I’ll miss the game” Patrick states with a slight pout.
“Not if you hurry.”
~~~~~
"I won't keep you much longer, just a few more questions," the female interviewer says, holding the microphone up to Art. "Was the training for this upcoming match particularly challenging?" Before the interviewer could finish her sentence, Art was shaking his head. "Not necessarily, different for sure, but not harder."
"As of now, can you confirm or deny the rumor that you have started working with Olympic Coach Dylan Y\L\N?" the interviewer asked, lifting the mic slightly closer to his mouth. "Ummm," Art hesitates, accompanied by a smile. "I think I can. Yes, Dylan is my new coach."
"So you and your opponent today have trained under the same coach?" the interviewer asks, scrunching her brow. "Yes, we have," Art nods. "One more question, is there any special woman in Art Donaldson's life right now?" the interviewer asks with a smile. The sound of camera clicking intensifies, catching Art's attention. Intrigued, the interviewer turns around as well. "She is beautiful," Art says absentmindedly, staring in the direction where you're coming from. You give small waves to friends as you walk in. "That's your opponent's fiancé... and I guess also your trainer's daughter?" the interviewer says, looking confused and turning back to face Art.
"Really?" Art asks, faking shock with a dazed expression. "Yes," the interviewer nods. "I mean.. I meant what I said, She is beautiful," Art said with a laugh, causing the interviewer to join in. His eyes never leaving you. "Does your coach know you have a crush on his daughter?" the interviewer joked, chuckling. "He might now," Art says with a laugh before giving a quiet , "Nice meeting you," as he walks away out of frame.
A short while later, you find yourself reaching for a bottle of water from a nearby table, inserting one of those adorable green straws they had. Just as you're about to take a sip, a voice catches you off guard from behind. "There you are," Art says, a smile lighting up his face as he jogs towards you. As he approaches, you can't help but notice how close he gets, almost too close.
"You're not exactly great at keeping secrets, huh?" you chuckle, taking a step back. Art smirks, "Can't two friends have a conversation?" Peeking over your shoulder at the ongoing interviews, you reply with a straw in your mouth, "We're not even supposed to be friends. You're supposed to be my Dad's client, or from what I heard your crush." You laugh, recalling a question from one of the interviewers. "You're going to get us caught," you whisper quietly into the straw.

"I understand. I can't stand next to my trainer's daughter," Art nods, "Orrr, my opponents, fiancé, but maybe can I stand close to my crush?" Art asks.

 “I think you could, yeah” you nod trying to keep the smile on your face. “Crush it is,” Art says with a smile taking a step forward, yet still maintaining a slight distance. “Did you get the pictures?” Art asks his eyes falling down to your lips. “Yeah, we got them," you confirm with a nod, unable to hide your smile when you notice his lingering gaze. “So we’re in the clear?” his eyes still fixated on your lips, as if he's ready to pounce. "Not yet," you laugh, taking a step back. "We have to wait for them to go to press." Art throws his head back with a strained laugh, and you can't help but watch his Adam's apple bobs up and down. You hadn’t realized until that moment how much you wanted him, it was an all consuming need.
“Just one day," you murmur, unsure if you're speaking to Art or yourself. "Just one day," Art echoes, his eyes now fixed on your neck, his finger brushing your curls away. You watch as he exhales shakily, looking at the fading hickeys on your shoulder, barely hidden by makeup. "Just one day," you remind, removing his hand from your chest. "Just one day," Art repeats, tearing his gaze away to look back up at you. "Your car is here, Mr. Donaldson," a man in black approaches and announces.

“One minute” Art says, gesturing for another second. The man nods in acknowledgment and walks away. “Come with me?” Art asked. “I don’t think that’ll look good.” You alluded to the countless people with cameras surrounding you.

“I couldn’t care less” Art says, shaking his head slightly. “I’d kiss you right here, if you’d let me ” Arts words catch you off guard, and you take a deep breath to try to steady your heart beat. 

“This planning stuff is more for you than me, so you can feel more comfortable. And I’m perfectly fine doing it,’s just …” he trails of his eyes falling back down to your lip. "Alright, I'll come," you rush out, convincing yourself it's to prevent him from kissing you right then. But deep down you knew you just wanted to be near him. You follow closely behind.

Art swiftly enters the car before you lean up, capturing you with a kiss. Before you could even fully step inside, his hand gently grasped your cheek, drawing you closer to his lips as he guided you into the vehicle. Lost in the intensity of the moment, you surrender to the kiss. practically falling inside. The sound of the car door closing behind you brings you back to reality, but the kiss continues to deepen. Suddenly, the driver rolls up the partition, creating a sense of privacy.
A sense of responsibility tugs at you, and you reluctantly break the kiss when Art's hand starts to wander up your bare leg. "We can't," you whisper, "We don't even have a condom," you add, hoping the driver couldn’t overhear.


“You’re right” Art mumbles, sitting back against the seat trying to catch his breath. “ I lost myself for a second” Art laughs, attempting to slow his heartbreak. ”After the game I’ll come to your room” you nod, looking forward trying to gather yourself. “Don’t talk about that, talk about something else” Art says his voice coming out more strained. “Like what?” You turn around and ask. Your eyes landing on the strained erection in his pants. “Oh!” You say, snapping your head back forward. The familiar ache of your core comes back, and you have to bite the inside of your cheek in an attempt to control yourself.


Against your better judgment, you take another peak. His hard shaft still straining against the fabric, you could damn near see the veins on his dick. “Can I?” You ask in a voice barely above a whisper. “Y-yeah” Art replies with a nod agjusting in his seat. You rub your hand back and forth against the Arts bulge while listen as his breath becomes more and more ragged.


Art makes a low moan and that’s enough for you to begin unzipping his pants. Against his better judgment he stops you. “Are you sure?”
“Yeah” you nod breathlessly, fumbling with his pants, pulling them down until his dick springs free. When you begin pumping his shaft, he takes in a sharp breath which causes you to smile. You savor the feeling of his heavy dick in your hand, trying to combat the thoughts of his thick long length inside you. When Art's hips buck into your hand, you fold. “I need you inside of me”, Art opens his mouth to protest and then closes, watching as you bunch up your dress around your waist, pull your panties to the side and straddle him. He grabs your waist with one hand and lines himself up with your entrance with the other. 


You sink onto him with a little too loudly of a moan and Art does the same. Opening his mouth for a sloppy kiss, he doesn’t wait for you to adjust to his size, moving you up and down his dick by your waist. ”shit I-“ Art groans out a wave of pleasure hitting him.
“-I can’t go back to condoms” he moaned, scrunching his brow in pleasure. You laugh and Art quickly retaliates by slamming you hard down on him. You let out a loud moan reflexively using your hand, trying to pull off slightly.

Art moves your hand out of the way, holding you down on him by your waist. “I’m serious”, Art grows leaning forward for another kiss while returning to his previous, rhythm. His words cause you to squeeze around him, and he lets out another low ground throwing his head back, breaking the kiss.



“I’m not going to last much longer” Art says breathlessly. “Just a little longer baby” you coo, leaving kisses on his Adam’s apple down his neck. “You drive me crazy, you know that” you moan feeling his pace fastest. “I do?” you feel Art smile against your cheek. You nod, falling into the crook of his neck enjoying the feeling of him fucking into you. “I want you to cum in me” you whisper, kissing the crook of his neck. “Fuck” Art groans, throwing his head back again. “You’re going to kill me” he states with a strained laugh.


You feel your release building so you decide to taunt him. ”you don’t want to fill me up?” You ask innocently, removing your head from the crook of his shoulder. Look down at him with lust, filled eyes. “Don’t” Art warns, his grip on your waist tightening, “you don’t want to give me a baby?” You huff out trying to keep your voice steady literally feeling him in your stomach. “Fuc- shit shit shitttt” Art moans holding you down onto him filling you up with his cum. His moans echoed through the car, the poor driver. 


“Fuck,” Art states after a minute. “Yea fuck,” you laugh, leaving a kiss on his cheek. “I think I might have a breeding kink”. Art laughs, “Me too,” you say with a smile, leaving another kiss on his head. You feel him twitch inside you, and knowing Art, you knew he would be ready for round two in a minute. You try to get off, but he holds you tighter, keeping you stationary. 

“I want it to stick” he smiles. Oh his smile, you rolled your eyes. You loved him, you knew it now, and you had a feeling he did too. You had been lying to yourself pretending you liked you didn’t care as much as he did. But at that moment you knew you never wanted anyone but him.



You glance out the window to see you were seconds away from the stadium, and then you notice your father standing on the sidewalk. “Oh my god! MY DAD HERE” you say, scurrying out of Art's lap. Art looks out the window, seeing your father standing on the sidewalk expectingly. “Shit” Art huffs, sitting up slightly, pulling up his pants, you take a wet rag next to the champagne and quickly wipe the inside of your leg. You quickly fix yourself before rushing to wipe off any remains of your lipstick off his mouth with your hand.
"Oh no, do I have lipstick on my mouth?" you ask frantically. "Nope, all clear," Art replies with a grin, planting a quick kiss on your lips. "Art," you warn, settling back in your seat. "My bad," Art chuckles, getting ready to exit the car. The car come to stop and your dad Yanks open the door.
"Hurry up, we're late. Mike's already inside," your Dad urges, When he sees you, his expression turns puzzled.
"We were heading in the same direction, so we decided to ride together," you explain before he can say anything. Your dad eyed you both suspiciously. "Alright, let's go," he says, ushering Art into the building. You wanted to say goodbye or wish him luck, and you could sense Art wanted to as well but it would be just too obvious.
You step out of the car, rummaging through your wallet. You tap on the driver's window, and he rolls it down. "Sorry about that," you apologize, handing him a 100 dollar bill before heading into the building.
Once inside the stadium you sit next to your Dad’s team which was now also partially Arts team and somehow also Mikes. Your phone buzzes and look down to see a familiar unsaved number.
“I think your Dad on to us”
“What did he say?” you text back anxiously your fingers moving fast on the keys.
“Nothing really, but i think he knows”
“Did he seem mad?”
“Not really”
“That’s good” you send, letting out a sigh you didn’t know you were holding in.
“Good luck :)” you add before stuffing your phone in your purse . Almost immediately your phone dings and you pull it back out.
“You gave me enough of that in the car ; )” you can’t help but smile at his corniness.
“You’re nasty.”
“Not as nasty as you” you’re about to laugh at his message when you hear a voice directly behind you. “You guys are actually freaks” Patrick says with a laugh jumping over the seat so he was directly next to you. “I applaud you guys for staying consistent at least” Patrick says lightly hitting you on the shoulder. “Can you mind your business” you say rolling your eyes, stuffing your phone in your purse.
“Actually I’ve been minding you two’s business all day with no pay by the way” Patrick adds. “So I think I’ve earned the right to be a little nosy” Patrick says making a pinching gesture.
“So you delivered the pictures?”
“Yes” he responded with a nod
“Thank you” you express your appreciation, turning your attention back to the court.
“Do you think he’s gonna win” Patrick asks leaning in slightly, curious to your answer.
"I hope so, but I don't know. I haven't seen him play in a while," you admit with a weak smile, the reality of the situation sinking in. "I really hope he does win," you mumble.
Author note : GUYS FEEL FREE TO COMMENT I LOVE READING COMMENTS
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kayhi808 · 2 months ago
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First Crush - 15
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Steve, not knowing what Abby likes or didn't like, played it safe with pepperoni pizza. She said she liked the red round circles, so that was a safe bet.
Steve watched as she climbed up onto her chair with the booster seat. She made him nervous with some of her near misses. He was ready to move quick if she tipped over the chair or lost her footing. "You need help there, Abs?"
"No need. Tank you." She finally plops her bottom in her seat and Steve's able to release the breath he was holding. Earlier, she had instructed him on where to find the plates and glasses in the kitchen. And where to get her favorite cup for her juice because she can only drink out of that one. The other cups made her juice taste funny.
"I liked the stuff on top," picking off all the cheese and pepperoni and leaving a naked slice in her plate.
"I don't think your mom likes you to eat like that."
Nodding and licking her hand, "Uh huh."
"Abbbyyy." Steve gives her a pointed look, trying to look serious.
She cackles, hiding her laugh behind her hands, getting more pizza sauce on her face. "I almost tricks you!" She rolls up her naked pizza slice, holding it in her little fist and eats it like a churro.
"You can't be tricking me like that. I don't want to get your Mama mad at me. Do you want me to be in trouble?"
"No. I's just tricks you."
"If I get your Mama angry with me, she won't let me watch you or come over anymore."
Abby let's out a dramatic gasp, "No. I's sowwy. You my uncle. You needs to visit me now."
Steve smiles. "That's right. I'm your Uncle."
Suddenly Abby bites her lip and looks close to tears. "Uncle Steve? I did bads."
"What's wrong, Abby?" Steve patiently waits for her to continue. "I tricks you before. Mama only let me have 2 stories before sleeps. Not 3."
"You know what? I think we can make this a special treat tonight. I'm ok with 3 stories."
Abby squeals, jumping down off her seat and running around the table to Steve. She tugs on his arm so he can lean down and she gives him a greasy pizza kiss on his cheek. "Tank you so much!!"
Trying to dodge her sticky hands, he plops her back in her booster. "How about you finish up your pizza for me?"
Abby does a happy little wiggle in her chair and continues to eat. Steve grabs another slice for himself but can't help but pick off a couple pepperonis and added it to Abby's plate. "Tank yous!"
After dinner, Steve tried to clean Abby up the best he could. She had pizza sauce everywhere. He even had little red handprints on his shirt.
She had her little dance party after dinner. "Awexa? Play Abby's Dance Party, pwease." It's a mix of Disney and her favorite pop songs. Steve's personal favorite was a song "I'll Make A Man Out of You," because Abby insisted on singing to him along with a reenactment of the movie. He adds "Mulan" to his list of movies to watch. Steve also got a quick tutorial on Taylor Swift. He was also surprised she had music from the 1940s. "Oh, Mama needed to learn new dances." Abby shakes her butt, "like dis."
"Oh, like that, huh?"
"Yup."
******
You and Bucky return to your apartment. Steve is on the couch watching TV. You scan quickly to see if Abby is around. "How'd things go?"
"Great. She's in her room. Asleep." You walk down the hall to check on her. She's tucked in, all snug.
Returning to the living room, worried, "Did she give you any trouble?" You notice the hand print on his T-shirt.
"Not at all." Looking down at his shirt smiling. "She's a little aggressive when eating pizza. It'll come out in the wash. It's nothing. We drew and colored, had dinner, a dance party and got ready for bed."
"Thank you so much for tonight."
"Of course. Anytime." Bucky gives you a kiss, promising to call you in the morning and they head home.
******
"Mama! Yous home!" You open your eyes and Abby is up close and in your personal space. You grab her and roll her across you to plop her on your bed.
"Of course I'm home. I was only away for a little while," snuggling with your baby. "Did you have fun with Mr. Captain last night?"
"Oh, Mama, guess what's."
"What?"
"He's not Mr. Captain. He's Uncle Steve. He says so."
"Oh, yea?"
"Mmhmm. I told him, my family is you and me. And you know what he tells me?"
Your eyes fill with tears, "What did he tell you?"
"He says now I had a new Uncle, too!" Abby claps for herself. "I has more family, Mama! We not alone!"
"Yea, baby," pulling her close and tucking her under your chin. "We're not alone anymore."
@waywardhunter95 @wintrsoldrluvr @rebeccapineapple @ordelixx @onceithough @crazyunsexycool @thezombieprostitute @ilovetaquitosmmmm @julvrs @unaxv @s-a-v-a-n-a-34 @winterslove1917 @ozwriterchick @mrs-bucky-barnes-73 @mrsnikstan @hisredheadedgoddess28 @itsteambarnes @otterlycanadian @purplecolordeer @samsgirl93 @buckitostan @blackbirdwitch22 @littleredwolf @mcucatlady @silas-aeiou @hzdhrtss @florie1 @thecubanator2 @enchantedbarnes @selella @fireeyes-on-teller-dixon-grimes @cjand10 @pancake-05
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its-avalon-08 · 6 months ago
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Hi! i love daniel riccardo and lando norris, can you maybe do one where you are daniel's best friend and end up falling for lando? you grew up in an abusive childhood so daniel is fiercly protective of u, and he doesn't like that lando is flirting with u (daniel and y/n is purely platonic pls),
i'll always be your home (dr3 platonic + ln4)
tw- abusive household
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the monaco grand prix was always a chaotic spectacle, but this year, the real drama was brewing off the track. you, ever the loyal friend, sat with daniel in the mclaren hospitality area, dodging champagne showers and lando's relentless teasing.
"hey bubs," lando sidled up, a mischievous glint in his eye, "think you can handle a real yacht party later? not like those snooze-fests danny drags you to."
daniel, already bristling at lando's nickname for you, snorted. "actually, y/n loves classic rock marathons. much better than your dubstep-infused ear torture."
you squeezed daniel's arm, stifling a laugh. "don't worry, honey badger, i can handle both." you'd picked up his playful nickname for himself, a constant reminder of his unwavering support.
growing up in an abusive environment had left scars, but daniel had become your anchor. he saw past your nervous flinches and forced smiles, his protectiveness a constant comfort.
later that night, under the twinkling lights of monte carlo, you found yourself drawn to lando's easy charm. you dueled with him on jet skis, his laughter echoing across the water, a sound that sent shivers down your spine. he felt like home, like a sense of comfort and safety.
noticing your growing closeness, daniel pulled you aside. his smile was strained. "y/n, are you ok?"
"yeah, why wouldn't i be?"
"lando," he said, his voice low. "he can be… a lot."
you sighed. "daniel, i can handle lando. i want to handle him."
silence stretched between you. daniel's gaze softened, a hint of pain flashing through his blue eyes. "i just want to make sure you're happy, safe. you deserve the best, y/n."
tears welled up in your eyes. you squeezed his hand. "i am happy, thanks to you. you're like a brother to me and i love you for it, but… lando makes me feel…" you trailed off, unable to articulate the unfamiliar butterflies in your stomach.
daniel chuckled, the sound laced with relief. "like you're on a rollercoaster? lando can be a bit of a daredevil." he paused, then added, "but if he ever hurts you…"
you finished his sentence with a mock glare. "honey badger unleashed, right?"
he grinned, the familiar twinkle back in his eyes. "exactly. now, go have fun. just… promise me you'll be careful, alright?"
you threw your arms around him in a hug. "always."
the next few weeks were a whirlwind. you and lando went on secret dates, stolen kisses under the guise of "team strategy meetings." daniel, ever the detective, noticed your flushed cheeks and lingering smiles, but a relieved smile played on his lips whenever he saw you genuinely happy.
the sun beat down on the budapest paddock, reflecting off lando's helmet as he peeled it off. daniel, ever the opportunist, snagged him before he could disappear.
"lando, a word?" daniel's voice was quiet, a stark contrast to his usual boisterousness.
lando followed him into a shaded corner, a playful grin fading as he saw the seriousness etched on daniel's face. "alright, mate, what's up?"
daniel hesitated, running a hand through his sweat-damp hair. "look, lando, i know you and y/n have been… hitting it off lately."
lando's grin returned, a touch sheepish. "yeah, she's pretty awesome, isn't she?"
"she is," daniel agreed, his voice heavy. "but there's something you need to know about her."
lando's smile faltered completely. he'd noticed the flinch y/n sometimes had, the way she seemed to shut down in certain situations. he hadn't pushed, but it had gnawed at him.
daniel took a deep breath. "y/n… she's been through a lot. more than you know." he hesitated again, then continued, his voice low. "she doesn't deserve to be hurt, lando. not again."
lando felt a pang in his chest. the playful teasing suddenly felt cruel in light of what daniel was implying. "hurt her? mate, i would never—"
daniel cut him off, his voice thick with emotion. "you wouldn't believe the things she's had to deal with. the strength it takes her just to get through the day…" he trailed off, wiping a hand across his eyes. "i just… i promised myself i'd protect her."
lando stared at him, his heart clenching. he'd never seen daniel like this, so vulnerable. a new respect bloomed for the man who was more than just a teammate, but a fierce protector.
"daniel," lando said, his voice firm despite the tremor in his hands. "listen to me. y/n is incredible. kind, funny, strong as hell. and the way she lights up when you talk to her… it's something special."
daniel looked up, a flicker of hope in his eyes. "you… you care about her?"
"care about her?" lando scoffed, a genuine smile breaking through. "mate, i'm smitten. i haven't been able to stop thinking about her since that night in monaco. but trust me, hurting her is the last thing i'd ever do. i want to make her happy, to be there for her the way you have been."
daniel's shoulders slumped in relief. a watery smile played on his lips. "just… don't mess up, alright? she deserves the world."
"i know," lando promised, a newfound determination burning in his eyes. "i'll take care of her, mate. you can count on me."
from then on, things shifted. lando toned down the teasing, replaced by genuine care. he made an effort to understand your past, offering a supportive ear and a shoulder to lean on.
the hungarian twilight cast long shadows across the budapest track, the last embers of the setting sun painting the sky in fiery hues. you leaned against the railing, the city lights twinkling below, a bittersweet ache settling in your chest.
the race had been exhilarating, a nail-biting finish that left you breathless. lando and daniel did amazingly.
suddenly, a familiar voice broke the silence. "lost in thought, shoey queen?" lando stood beside you, his blue eyes holding a hesitant warmth.
you offered a small smile. "just reflecting on the race. it was incredible."
he nodded, then cleared his throat nervously. "listen, y/n, there's something i… something i've been wanting to say."
his vulnerability sent a jolt through you. you'd seen lando's playful facade, the charming daredevil who thrived on competition. but this lando, standing before you with a tremor in his voice, was captivating.
"alright," you encouraged, your heart pounding a frantic rhythm against your ribs.
he took a deep breath. "these past few weeks… they've been incredible. getting to know you, not just as daniel's best friend, but as y/n. you're strong, funny, and you have this incredible spark in your eyes that makes me want to be a better person."
his words washed over you, each one a brushstroke painting a picture of affection you hadn't dared to imagine. tears welled up in your eyes, a mixture of joy and a fear of vulnerability you hadn't fully conquered.
"y/n," he continued, his voice dropping to a husky whisper, "i know you've been through a lot. and i want you to know, whatever it is, i'm here for you. to listen, to support you, to be your shoulder to cry on."
he reached out, his thumb gently brushing away a stray tear that trailed down your cheek. the simple touch ignited a thousand unspoken emotions within you.
"so," he said, his voice thick with emotion, "would you like to… maybe go out sometime? just you and me. no strategy meetings or champagne showers, just a chance to get to know each other better."
the weight of his sincerity settled upon you, a comforting blanket against your past hurts. you met his gaze, a newfound determination sparkling in your own eyes.
"i'd like that very much, lando," you whispered, a single tear slipping down your cheek, this time a tear of pure hope.
he smiled, a radiant beam that chased away the twilight shadows. in that moment, under the budapest sky, bathed in the soft glow of the city lights, you knew this was just the beginning of something special.
later that night, you found daniel by the pool, a beer in his hand. "so," he said gruffly, "what happened with lando?"
a shy smile spread across your face. "he asked me out. officially."
he raised an eyebrow. "and?"
"and i said yes."
his lips twitched. "about time, shoey queen." he held you in a tight hug. "just promise me one thing."
you pulled back, concern flickering in your eyes. "anything."
"take care of each other. and if he ever breaks your heart…"
"honey badger unleashed, i know."
you both laughed, the sound echoing through the night. you knew daniel would always be there, a fierce protector turned loving friend, and with lando by your side, you were finally ready for something more.
🏎️🏎️🏎️🏎️🏎️🏎️🏎️🏎️🏎️🏎️🏎️🏎️🏎️🏎️🏎️🏎️🏎️🏎️🏎️🏎️🏎️🏎️
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melloollem · 8 months ago
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Family nights|| Bruce Wayne x Batmom Reader × Batboys
Summary: Your children keep you company after patrol until your husband arrives.
Warnings: English is not my native language.
(DC masterlist)
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You were woken by a movement at the bottom of the bed and your first reaction was to reach out to Bruce's side of the bed. Noticing the lack of your husband's warmth at your side, you reluctantly opened your eyes, a sigh escaped your lips and, as you moved your legs, you heard a complaint: "Mom, I'm here". You readjusted your position, with an expression of confusion on your face.
"Damian, I told you not to wake her." It was Tim's turn to speak, his sudden presence startled you, he'd come out of the bathroom in your room, damn vigilante skills, when had these kids gotten in here? "Tsk, you don't even know what happened, I didn't wake her, Drake" you sighed recognizing the scenario that always ended in a long argument between the boys, before Tim could retort arousing Damian's fury you butted in "Ok, you two have had enough of this, let's not do this now" Your body stretched towards Damian pulling him into your arms, while leaning on the headboard.
"Mummy's boy" Jason's mocking voice was heard as he lay down on the side of the bed that belonged to Bruce, had he been lying on the floor all this time? Confusion returned to her face at the thought. "Shut up, Todd, it's not my fault you're too old to be with your mother" Despite Damian's quick response, you felt him tense in your arms, you wouldn't have hugged him if you'd known it wasn't just him and Tim in the room, everyone knew how shy Damian was with displays of affection. Your embrace loosened, but the boy still didn't get off your lap.
"Get your big ass over there, Jason," said Dick as he got up from the floor too, but unlike Jason, he had a pillow in his hand, you couldn't even be surprised anymore. The eldest of your children settled down on the bed with the space left for him, turning to you and saying "Hi, Mom," a half-childish smile escaped him, and you reciprocated in the same way "Can you tell me what you're doing here?" Your tone was more serious than expected.
"Bruce asked us to stay with you," said Tim as he took Damian's place at the end of the bed. "He had some things to sort out after patrol," added Jason. You turned on the lamp next to the bed, all this time the boys were walking around the room with the help of the light from the hallway.
"Actually, father asked me to stay with you until he got back, the others invited themselves" Damian informed "In fact, Dick invited himself and pulled Tim and me into it" Jason let out in a tired grumble. "It would be like a slumber party, according to him" Tim let out a sigh, their eyes turned to Dick waiting for his side of the story and receiving only a shy smile in response.
You glanced at the clock on your bedside table as you said "It's late, one of you go and get him" Referring to Bruce, all of your children let out a tired sigh and before a general discussion started you said "Ok, text him and tell him to come" Dick was the one who picked up his cell phone and sent Bruce a text message, not quite sure how long it would take for him to see it.
You closed your eyes in an attempt to go back to sleep as kicks to your side tried to hit Tim "Damian, leave your brother so I can sleep" the younger man squeaked "But mom, he's lying on top of me" You didn't even have to open your eyes to know that Damian was exaggerating about his brother's current position. "Damian" his tone foreshadowed a reprimand, the boy shut up and moved further away from his brother.
A comfortable hush settled over the room, you hoped to return to your old state, but Tim was in opposition "I don't want to sleep" You abandoned the idea at this point in the discussion, realizing that it would be impossible. Dick quickly retorted "You're the one of us who needs the most sleep" An annoyed murmur escaped Jason "I'm the one who needs the most sleep" He, like you, really wanted to sleep, but it looked like this family was repulsed by the term.
"We can watch a movie" Tim said, you knew he was electric because of the mission, typical attitude. "Sure, look for something" Jason sighed in response to your declaration, he can't believe you gave in so easily. Tim flipped through the catalog, indecisive about what to watch "We could watch a musical, a comedy, a horror movie..." "Your voice is the most terrifying thing tonight," Jason cut off his brother, who continued to ramble on about the different types of movie you could watch.
At one point Tim opted for a mystery movie, you rolled your eyes at the choice, the kids always figured out the mystery before the middle of the movie, ruining the experience. You watched what was supposed to be a movie session turn into a loose conversation after Tim did exactly what you had predicted. They debated the mission, most of them, Jason just mumbled something at one time or another in agreement.
"Does anyone know how to solve this? What's he talking about?" Now they were talking about one of the Charade's riddles, and it seemed that Tim still had no idea what the villain meant. "It's an allusion to mirrors" Bruce was the one who answered as he entered the room, all eyes turned to him and Jason let out a relieved sigh "Finally, I'm going to sleep" He stood up and stretched his body lazily. "What about the movie?" Damian was the one who asked "The script is weak" Tim said following Jason's example and sliding out of bed, now that he had an idea of where to start solving the puzzle there was no reason to stay there.
You watched each of your children leave the room with a brief "good night", you answered each of them, Dick was the last to leave, closing the door. A sigh of relief left your lips, wishing you could finally go back to sleep, Bruce chuckled at your attitude, before sliding in next to you, your eyes following his every move as he got into bed.
"Everything okay?" Your question was prompted by his delay in returning home "Will be" your brow furrowed hoping for a better answer, that kind of vague assurance never brought good news, but all Bruce did when he noticed your expression was leave a quick kiss on your forehead with the same words "Will be", you decided not to ask any more questions, but that subject still circled your mind.
"Family movie?" he asked, turning to the television, intending to change his focus, you followed his example, the movie was still playing in a scene that wasn't so interesting right now "Tim's choice. You're the only one missing" Even though you smiled, Bruce noticed what you meant in those words, but decided to ignore it "What movie is that?" Now he was looking at you. Taking advantage of the moment, you caught the changes in Bruce's image, he looked more tired than usual "I'm not sure, but it looks like we have two killers and one of them is the victim's brother" Anticipating his next question, you added "Tim spared no details".
A silence consumed the room, the two of you staring at the television, wrapped in each other's embrace. You weren't sure how much of Bruce's thoughts were on the movie, he seemed to be thinking about something else, but he wouldn't share it with you. Bruce had made a vow to himself not to bring the dilemmas of vigilante life into rooms with you, too bad he couldn't stop them from plaguing his own mind.
"You know you can tell me everything, right?" You tried to broach the subject gently, wishing Bruce would share his fears with you "Tim has terrible taste in movies" His response took you by surprise, drawing a laugh from you "Said the man from the musicals" You allowed the light tone to take over the conversation "I thought that was one of the things you loved about me" He couldn't believe it "I think that was one of the things you said on our first date" Another laugh erupted from you at your husband's surprised expression, "I'm sorry about that" An amused smile escaped you and Bruce could only smile back at the sight of it.
Your laughter gradually subsided and now you just looked at each other in love "I'm serious about this, you can tell me anything" You took advantage of the comfort of the situation to clarify your speech. "I know that" He seemed to focus on his own thoughts for a second "I love you" Bruce hoped that declaration would be able to quell all your worries. "I know that" You smiled cheekily, but quickly returned to your passionate expression "And I love you too".
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cherrylovelycherry · 6 days ago
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Okay, maybe Ratio x gn!reader tarte aux fraises? i know u love ratio muehehe
.note. omg oke oke, i know what i have to do. ( ◡̀_◡́)ᕤ (I always end up writing so many words that I have to erase pieces of the original idea. T_T)
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𓂅new order. "tarte aux fraises."
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Try hard
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pairing. dr ratio x gn!reader cw/genre. angst, academic pressure, ratio being rude, again. synopsis. Like he said, you just need to try hard. And if you can't handle the pressure, what better than to withdraw from medical school? full menu
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"No," His eyes on you, by those sharp words, coming together with the other glances of your classmates.
"Uhm, would it be a possible case of appendicitis?" You spoke, something nervous, but your words were almost like a question rather than an affirmation.
"Wrong,"
His voice again, almost as if he were glad of your mistake.
"Are you answering or are you asking me, Y/N?" Ratio spoke, almost with a despicable tone.
You just looked down.
It was almost always the same, for him, all your answers are wrong, he always had to find something wrong with what you said.
"If you're going to answer again as your classmate, refrain from talking and just say you didn't study anything." Ratio said, for all your classmates in the room.
"Honestly, I don't even know why I still continue teaching some of you."
Oh, and you knew perfectly well that he was referring to you.
He says, almost as if your existence were a total nonsense for him.
"All of you are dumb, you all have the same level of intelligence as an Earthworm, maybe a little less than one even." His words come out almost sharp again.
"How can it be possible you can't even answer the simplest question?" Ratio spoke out, almost frustrated by the lack of intelligence on most of his students.
Your cheeks became red, the way Ratio spoke was always so harsh, so harsh and direct, and even more so if it was you who answered a question, he never missed an opportunity to show that you were wrong in front of everyone else.
"Now, that's enough chit-chat, back to the topic." He looked at the board, his expression was somewhat serious, his arms behind his back, as he stood in the middle of the classroom.
"The appendix is a small, worm-like structure that branches off the back of the colon. It's located in the lower right lobe of the abdomen. The main problem with appendicitis is when it becomes infected and then blocks all waste product from leaving the colon." He spoke, standing at the front of the class.
"What does that mean?" he spoke again. This time with a much easier question than he asked you.
"Mhm, you," he pointed to a student.
"…That means all the waste from everything that comes through the digestive system doesn't have anywhere to go, and can back up into all of your abdominal cavity," She said, with some nerves, but keeping her words as firm as she could.
"Correct." He spoke, as he saw her answer, with a much calmer expression this time.
"The appendix becomes inflamed and very sensitive when an infection begins to form in it. You can experience fever chills that go down into your groin like cold water. The most common pain is in the abdomen, specifically in the lower right side. It can be mistaken for a stomach ache, or even menstrual cramps. But with further care, it can be determined as appendicitis." Ratio speaks again, almost a little happier.
"Anyone else?" He asked.
"If there is no intervention, it could explode," this time you dared to speak again, trying to sound firm.
"A precise answer, even from you, for a change," He spoke with a little more than a sarcastic tone, but as usual, he can't seem to say anything without adding an annoyed tone to everything he says.
"That's true. An appendix that is left untreated can burst, or perforate. But not always because of pain close to the appendix area will be necessary to remove or attempt an intervention." He says, as he returns to look at the board.
"If the appendix bursts, the pain might go away, but a much worse process, is going to start. The appendix will begin to break down, and the bacteria and pus from the organ can pass into the abdominal cavity, causing a widespread and severe infection. This is called peritonitis." Ratio spoke, his voice almost firm, and serious again.
You felt somewhat calmer, but still, you couldn't help but feel self-conscious.
Was it necessary that I always talk to you like this?
Because after all, you were his partner.
Ratio kept his eyes on you for a few moments, as if analyzing your expression. He almost always knew when you had those thoughts.
As he finishes speaking, the class bell begins to ring, almost as a sign that the class just ended.
"You are all dismissed." Ratio said, putting his hands behind his back, his eyes looking at the students as they began to leave the room.
You focused on keeping your stuff, without a hurry, because you weren't very excited to eat in medical school. The food wasn't so good or appetizing there.
The room was getting emptier and emptier, except for just the two of you, since you were the last one to leave.
Ratio leaned against the front of the desk, and crossed his arms in front of his chest, he had something in mind to discuss with you.
"Y/N." His voice came out quite firm, and almost demanding.
"Yes?" Your voice almost sounded like a whisper, a whisper of nervousness, still, you answered him.
You could already feel what kind of a talk he was going to have with you now
Ratio seemed quite serious, his eyes almost fixed on you, as if analyzing your every move.
He waited a few seconds before speaking. He still retained his serious expression.
"You're falling behind on a lot of the classes." He spoke, with an almost severe voice.
You just looked down.
He knew that you didn't always answer very intelligently, but it seemed like he just liked using every single opportunity he got to be harsh on you.
His arms were still crossed in front of his chest, keeping his position in front of the desk.
"I know…" your voice came out a little smaller this time.
Ratio sighed, he didn't change his position or expression, on the other hand, yours became somewhat more tense, you already knew that he was far from finished.
"Not only that," he continued to speak, his voice now more demanding.
"You don't usually answer my questions as intelligently as you should. You answer in ways that are almost as unintelligent as the others." he spoke again, his voice slightly higher than before.
"You know you should study more."
Again, a tone that seemed somewhat irritated.
"I am,"
"You're not." Ratio continued, his voice suddenly became very firm.
You can't help but feel even more self-conscious, more tensed than before.
He was right, even if he was, he didn't always have to say it that way.
"I don't even know why you're still in this class, if you've answered right a small percentage of times."
"But i'm trying, Ratio," You spoke, this time directing yourself towards him as your equal, as you did in private.
"Trying," He repeated. "You are just not trying hard enough."
Ratio's hands now moved from his chest, to his sides, still leaning against the table.
That didn't seem to change his expression at all, the same seriousness.
"You need to study more, you need to stop falling behind so much, to be more firm, and at least,"
He stopped, for a few seconds, as if thinking of his next words.
"To answer my questions correctly more times than you already do, stop with this mediocrity."
His tone became almost more severe.
"Honestly, I don't know why you don't take your time to pay more attention." He continued, with that severe, demanding tone.
"You're not in your old secondary education anymore, these are more complex medical concepts to treat complex diseases."
He said again, still keeping his tone and position.
"I'm going to try harder," you said.
"You better."
Ratio's answer was short, but the seriousness with which it was given almost made you even more tensed.
Again, a few seconds of silence, Ratio seemed to be thinking of his next words.
"I'm going to start being more demanding with you…" he spoke, leaning a little more against the desk, his eyes still fixed on you.
"I won't let you pass with the bare minimum in my classes" The feeling you have after you hear those words is the most nervous of all.
Ratio always got that demanding, and hard tone when talking to you about studies.
You know perfectly how serious he was when he said that.
"I won't go easy on you anymore," he says, in a much firmer tone.
"From now on if you don't answer correctly more times than you do now, you won't pass my classes."
Ratio was very strict with his classes, and even more so when it came to you.
"No more mediocre answers, I want you to start actually using that brain that you have." His tone now very demanding.
"You are going to start giving more intelligent answers, and not stupid ones that any other student could give."
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A few days have passed since that talk between you and Ratio.
He has become much more demanding, and much stricter with his classes.
His questions were much harder to answer, and he always waited for intelligent answers from you.
He had put you in the spotlight every time you were in class, he had increased the number of questions he asked you, and every time you answered, he seemed to be analyzing your every word.
But of course, you noticed, in your nervousness after saying 'medium-great' answers, how your classmates didn't answers difficult questions like you. Not to mention that there were always two or one student whom he always congratulated for her efforts.
Ratio continued with the same demanding attitude, continuing to set high standards for you.
He kept asking you difficult questions, and even if you answered one correctly, he would go on to another, more complex one.
He didn't miss a single opportunity to point out your failures, and you could always see the satisfaction on his face, whenever you got the answer wrong.
Even now, you can feel his gaze on you, as if he's waiting for you to say something wrong, to see him frown.
The way he seemed to be always focused on you in the class, no matter how hard you answered the questions.
Everyone could tell that even though you were his partner, he didn't spare you from his demands for answers.
You had to constantly use that huge book, and study more and more every day. It was becoming tiresome because you barely had time for anything else, and on the other hand, your classmates seemed to be studying less than you.
The bell for the end of class had just been rung, the majority of the class was already picking their stuff to leave.
But you knew very well that Ratio was still there waiting for you to approach.
And yes, you were going to do that.
With calm steps and somewhat anxious, you approached the large desk near the board.
"Uhm, Veritas?" You said, carefully.
"Can we eat together?" You asked, knowing that after this class he would no longer dictate another one in the day, and you too, had no other class for today.
Ratio was sorting through some papers, putting them in various folders on his desk, with that same serious expression he had the rest of the time.
When he heard your voice, he stopped sorting papers, and looked at you.
His eyes seemed sharper every time you looked into them.
Without taking his eyes off you, he placed the last folder in place, and rested his hands on the table.
He didn't answer immediately, as if he was thinking about your request.
"Is there a reason?"
Ratio's tone was somewhat firm, his eyes still fixed on you, as if questioning why you, out of nowhere, suddenly wanted to eat with him.
"No,"
You didn't really know why, either.
Maybe it was because you didn't want to be left alone. Or maybe because you needed a break, your brain had been filled with so much knowledge, so much information that you felt it was going to explode.
"I just want to be with you," Your voice coming out a little more nervous this time.
Ratio was still looking at you, his eyes, very much analyzing you, as if he was searching for a real reason.
It was always like this with him, he never answered anything immediately.
Still, he didn't take his eyes off you, as if he was analyzing your thoughts, your request, and your every action.
Finally, after a few seconds, he spoke.
"Did you study?" He spoke, with that demanding but firm tone. His gaze was still fixed on you.
Your body slightly tensed up. You knew that if you hadn't, he probably wouldn't eat with you.
Even if he was your boyfriend, he was always like this.
"I did," Your voice came out with a small firmness, you actually spent the night studying.
Ratio kept looking at you carefully, his expression didn't change, he seemed to still be analyzing you, as if searching for lies in your eyes.
"How many hours?" His tone was still demanding, but he always made sure to correct you, to be even firmer with his words.
On the other hand, you were getting nervous. It was true that you spent all night studying, you didn't even have time to sleep, but if you said that, he would probably make you feel guilty for it.
So to not prolong the question, you gave a firm answer.
"Six hours, I swear."
Your voice was still firm, but nervousness was clearly expressed in it.
Ratio didn't change his expression, his eyes were still fixed on you, as if he could tell if you were lying or not.
He kept looking at you, in those few seconds he didn't say anything. Still looking at you, until he broke the silence.
"You haven't slept any?" His tone was much more demanding this time, his brows slightly furrowed, as if telling you that it was a mistake.
You knew perfectly well that it was a mistake, you already regretted it the moment you said it.
A small feeling of guilt took hold of your body, knowing that you were about to be scowled for that.
"No…"
You said, trying to keep your voice somewhat firm, but nervousness was present in it.
Ratio crossed his arms in front of his chest, and his eyes became more severe, almost with annoyance at your answer.
You knew perfectly well that that would happen.
"How are you going to study properly if you don't even sleep?" He questioned, in a demanding tone, as usual.
If you didn't sleep, he would scold you and if you slept, he would scold you too.
At the endings, it happened, as always, you even shed a few tears.
And it seems that that gave him remorse and he ended up agreeing to eat with you.
Your eyes were somewhat swollen, not much, but they were.
He made sure to hold your hand while eating quietly in a cafe near medical school.
You could notice how he was looking at your eyes almost every second, as if seeing the tiredness in them.
He almost looked like he felt guilty for making you cry, but he would deny it.
Ratio knew how demanding he could be, and how it could affect you.
But of course, he didn't apologize, because that would imply admitting that he was wrong.
You could see how he squeezed your hand, carefully while eating, as if making sure that your hand wouldn't slip from his.
It was quite obvious that he felt regret for making you cry. No matter how hard he denied it, his actions and his grip on your hand would always give it away.
The rest of the lunch was a little quiet, both of you only spoke a few words from time to time, not a lot.
He still continued to eat in silence, watching you from time to time.
His grip was firm on your hand, a little tight, but it didn't bother you, it was rather calming for you.
When he finished eating, he got up, and pulled you to get up from your chair.
He still had a firm grip on your hand.
"Let's go." Was the only thing he said, as he started to walk out of the cafeteria with you, your hand still attached to his.
Ratio started walking, with you following behind with your hand in his.
He wasn't walking too fast, or very slow, he was walking at a reasonable pace, but he made sure that you kept up.
He pulled you to stick to his side, and he made sure to look at you every few seconds.
You were walking in almost total silence, no one dared to say anything, and this was a little strange. Normally he was the first to say something.
His tight grip on your hand, his way of looking at you from time to time, made you feel a little nervous, but at the same time calm.
He didn't say anything as he walked, but you dared to say something.
"Where are we going?" You asked quietly, looking up slightly at him as you walked.
He looked at you, and his grip squeezed yours a little. Ratio spoke again.
"To my apartment." He replied, in the same firm tone.
"To your apartment?" You were a bit startled by that answer, because there was no way he was taking you to his apartment.
"Don't be tense." Ratio said, his tone was somewhat firm, but softer than before.
Before you could say anything else, he continued to speak, his words were firm and demanding, almost leaving no room for questioning.
"We're going to there, you're going to take a shower, and then you're going to take a long nap.
"I don't-"
Before you could reply, Ratio quickly cut you off. "I don't care what you're about to say, you need to rest."
He spoke with that firm but authoritative tone.
"You're going to take a damn shower, and you're going to take a damn nap for as long as it takes to get you back in shape."
In a way, that made you smile.
His actions showed you that he still cared about you.
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The last few days that had passed, were… very different. You spent them at Ratio's apartment.
Each day ended with him scolding you for studying so much, and falling asleep on his couch on several occasions.
You loved those moments with him, in spite of everything, you were really in love with him.
However, as quickly as those butterflies arrived in your stomach, they disappeared faster than they appeared.
"Incorrect again, Y/N,"
He said, holding his hand to the bridge of his nose.
"U-uh…" you said, feeling watched and judged by all your classmates at that moment.
You were currently in practical classes, you no longer just theorize.
"Less than a minute for the patient to bleed," he commented again, ratio, with total disapproval in his speech.
You stayed there, thinking about what to do, your mind running in circles to decide what to do.
And, without further ado, the girl that Ratio always congratulated, took her tweezers from your hands, starting to suture the patient.
You felt so stupid in that instant, the classmate that Ratio always complimented, always approved of her, even congratulated her, had just taken your tweezers from your hands.
You felt the gaze of your classmates on you. You could see that they were either feeling sorry for you, or judging you.
Ratio was silent, he looked irritated, but he wasn't scolding you.
The classmate who took the tweezers from her hands, finished suturing the patient completely, in what seemed to be a couple of seconds.
Talent always wins the effort.
"You've failed another suture." Ratio spoke, almost annoyed by your failure.
As always, whenever you made a mistake, he was always making sure to point it out, making sure to shame you in front of the rest of the class.
His disappointment was evident on his face, in his tone, his gestures.
"It's ridiculous, you can't even put a few damn stitches on a fake wound. How are you going to be a real doctor if you're always messing up everything?" His words were harsh, very much. His expression and his eyes, sharp, as always.
"You're not taking this seriously, you're making the same mistakes again and again." He continued, in the same irritated tone.
How could someone who studied so much, who spent many hours studying, fail so much? How could you fail so much, even though you spent so much time with the person who always seemed dissatisfied with you?
Your classmates' gaze, Ratio's gaze, your own self-judgment, and your frustration for being a complete failure, was too much. You felt your eyes begin to tear up, you could feel your hands shaking. You felt more and more nervous with every word coming out of his mouth. It wasn't just from the pressure, it was also from the frustration.
How was it possible, that he had so much patience, and complimented your classmate, even celebrated that she could suturate a patient, when you couldn't do the same?
His words, his looks of disappointment, they were starting to take their toll on you.
"You're right, doctor," you said, accepting his words, so that he would at least stop scolding you publicly. Ratio kept looking at you, that annoyed look still on his face.
You looked really small in his eyes. Small and weak, a complete failure. That's how he saw you at that moment.
"At this rate, I'm tempted to say that you're never going to be a good doctor."
You just nodded, not knowing what to answer, or if you should respond to that in the first place. The medical career was not easy, there were always scolding for everyone, but not scolding all classes with him.
You heard him say, 'Well, let's continue…', as he moved on to another kind of exercise.
You let your other classmates get closer to the practice stretcher, staying at the end of the group.
All you just did was play with your fingers and bite your lip, so you didn't cry. Because you couldn't even get out of the practice chirophan, because you'd have low grade. Although well, what a lower grade could he put on you if you already pulled the first exercise.
You looked up in the direction of Ratio, who was correcting a couple of your classmates on something. He was always correcting something, especially you.
Your eyes were beginning to become slightly red.
You really hated the suturations practices, you were never good at putting in a few damn stitches.
You were always clumsy, and your hands always trembled when you took the tweezers, like they were shaking now.
Why weren't you as talented as them? Why couldn't you even do something as simple as suturing?
"You're shaking, are you alright?" A voice came from behind you, you recognized who it was immediately.
It was the classmate who always did sutures perfectly, the one Ratio always complimented. She had a worried expression in her eyes, but you couldn't help but feel complete rejection and repulsion towards her.
Her question made you feel more humiliated.
"I'm fine." You replied, trying to sound firm, when in reality, your voice was on the verge of cracking.
She looked at you, not seeming to buy the answer you gave her.
She could see your hands shaking and you were biting your lip, it didn't seem like you were fine.
"Are you sure? You don't look very-" she tried to speak once more, but you didn't want her to continue.
"I said I'm fine, alright. Stop asking me that." You said, a little harshly, hoping that would make her shut up. Her eyes widened slightly at your response, she was surprised by your response. But, instead of being angry, she continued to look sorry for you.
"I'm just trying to-" she was about to say something again, but you were already fed up with her.
You were fucking jealous of her.
"Well, I don't want you to! Stop acting like you care about me!" You snapped at her, your voice louder than you expected it to be.
The rest of the class had turned their heads at you, including Ratio.
Why the hell did you do that?
The whole room was silent, the only noise present was your agitated breathing.
Ratio walked up to you, his eyes firmly on yours. He looked irritated, no, he looked angry at your reaction.
"To the hallway, now." He said firmly, gesturing for you to walk towards the hall.
You felt the eyes of your classmates on you, as you slowly walked out of the class, with Ratio behind you.
Once you got into the hallway, he closed the door behind him, leaving both of you alone in the hallway.
He looked at you, you could see irritation in his eyes.
He was completely irritated with the attitude you just had.
"What the hell is wrong with you?" He said, his voice almost sounded like a whisper, but still firm.
"Why the hell did you lash out at her like that?" He continued, he was waiting for an answer, an explanation for your behavior, and he wouldn't accept any bullshit excuse.
You stood there, not knowing what to say, and avoiding looking directly at him.
You didn't know how to explain your attitude, you yourself didn't even understand why you had done that.
Maybe it was because you were irritated, annoyed by her, or just because Ratio paid more attention to her or others than to you, no matter how much you studied.
And you couldn't understand why that girl was always so perfect either. The perfect student, the one who always did the exercises and sutures perfectly.
You were increasingly sure that talent far outperforms effort.
As you stood there, avoiding looking at him, Ratio was growing more and more impatient as the minutes passed. He expected some explanation, an answer to his question. But all he got was silence and you avoiding his gaze.
"Are you going to answer or just stay there, biting your lip?" He spoke again, this time with a firmer tone.
Again, you stayed there, still and saying nothing.
"Okay, then," he said, entering the practice chirophan and closing the door behind him.
You stood there, outside the practice chirophan, alone, on your own, with only your thoughts swirling around your head. You could still hear your classmates continuing practicing suturing in the chirophan, while you were left outside.
Your mind was a mess, going from one thought to another, from one feeling to another; anger, frustration, confusion, disappointment.
And jealousy. A lot of jealousy.
You could hear Ratio's voice, scolding other students. And again, you heard him compliment the girl who always does sutures perfectly.
She was talented, she was perfect, the best student in his eyes. He seemed to adore her, much more than he praised you.
It was not possible to know with that man, he was a mystery.
You walked over and sat down on one of the seats in the hallway, your body completely tired. Both physically and mentally.
Poor girl, you were jealous of her, when not even she did it on purpose to be better than you.
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The lesson was finally over.
You were sitting in the hallway, waiting for the whole class to leave, so you could enter and say something to Ratio.
But, to your annoyance, the girl who always did the perfect sutures, was one of the last to leave.
She was going to talk to Ratio, it was obvious.
So, you stayed in the hallway, watching as Ratio and that girl talked for a long time.
She looked happy, with a smile on her face. Ratio seemed in a good mood, he was listening to her speaking calmly. In fact, he was smiling, he was never usually that warm.
That image, that situation, it only irritated your mind more.
But you wouldn't do anything, because there was nothing to do.
Besides that in medical school, he was your teacher, not your boyfriend. So professionalism on his part was always ahead.
As the last student left, Ratio opened the practice chirophan and found you sitting on one of the seats in the hallway.
He looked at you, and for the first time, he had a slight hint of disappointment on his face.
He just looked at you for a few seconds, almost as if he wanted to say something, but he didn't.
He just let out a slight, silent, almost inaudible sigh.
"Come here." He said, gesturing to you to walk towards him.
You stood up, from the seat. You were about to walk towards him but, you suddenly felt nervous, your heart beating a little faster.
What if he wants to discuss that you're always getting low notes on the practical work?
Or maybe he wants to tell you that your effort is useless, because you'll never be as good as the other students.
Or even, he wants to kick you out of class for your recent behavior.
However, his words surprised you.
"I'm going to help you study," he said.
You really expected another scolding from him, but his words were soft.
Perhaps the excellent work of the best student in your class had change his mood.
"But I don't-"
Before you could respond, he cut you off, almost knowing what you were going to answer.
"I wasn't asking you, I was telling you." He said firmly.
He wasn't leaving room for questioning, if he was going to help you study, there was no use in trying to decline his offer.
In spite of everything, you couldn't help but get excited.
The thought of having his attention, and having an extra private class with him. You were really going to like it, you wanted to be alone with him.
In a way, it was a great opportunity to show him what you were capable of doing, and that you too had potential.
He gave you a small smile, as he saw the reaction on your face. And then he added, "We're starting today."
You liked being next to him, you feel like at school, almost like a teenage romance.
You were writing carefully what he explained to you, while he had an arm on your shoulders.
It moved you and made you nervous, even though your relationship was almost two years now.
He explained, corrected and commented, as usual. You nodded, listened and wrote what he said.
Everything was going well, until he suddenly paused, and he let out a sigh.
"There's something important I need to tell you." He said, suddenly, in a serious tone.
Your hands suddenly froze halfway between the page and writing. His words, his tone, his gaze. It made you feel nervous, your heartbeat increasing.
"What is it?"
Your voice came out in a somewhat nervous tone.
For a few seconds, he was serious, he didn't say anything, he just looked at you.
His eyes looking into yours, in a somewhat serious and intimidating way, before his expression suddenly change to one of slight annoyance.
"What the hell was that, what you did the other day?"
Ratio asked, suddenly changing the subject of the conversation.
You tensed up a bit, and bit your lip.
You knew immediately that he was referring to the little tantrum you threw, that day.
"I was…" you were at a loss for words, you didn't know what to say.
"I was just frustrated." You finally managed to say, your voice a bit low.
"Frustrated, right."
Ratio responded, in a slightly mocking tone.
"So you were frustrated, and you decided to take it out on a classmate, in front of the entire class?" Ratio looked at you, with that same serious and slightly annoyed expression.
Your heart was beating fast, you felt slightly guilty, knowing you acted inappropriately.
"I know it wasn't the best way to react, but…" you tried to explain yourself.
"No buts." He cut you off. "You embarrassed yourself, and you embarrassed me with your poor and childish behavior. As your teacher, I shouldn't have to deal with your tantrums.
His words stung a little, you felt ashamed.
But there was something else, behind his words. The mention of 'As your teacher'.
"I know, I'm sorry." You mumbled, looking down to the floor.
"I expect you to act like an adult. So I hope you'll apologize to your classmate." He said.
"I will."
You said, still avoiding his gaze, you didn't want to see his eyes, to see his expression.
That day wasn't the only one he helped you study on.
But as always, for him, everything was wrong in answers or in your diagnoses.
As you wrote down one of the last points of the list he had given you, he spoke up, looking at what you had written.
"That is incorrect," he said as he looked at one of the points.
You looked up at him, your eyes wide at his words. How could it have been wrong? The doubt began to consume your mind, and you felt frustrated that you weren't able to do everything perfectly.
Your frustration was beginning to grow, you had just spent hours studying and here he was telling you that you had all the things wrong.
You tried to protest, you tried to explain your answers, but he shut you down every time. His voice became sharper and firmer every time, he was losing patience with you and your constant mistakes.
Finally, he slammed the book on the table, the loud noise echoing through the empty room.
"That's it, enough. You're not getting anything right," he said, his voice stern.
You felt a pang in your chest from hearing his words. How was it possible that not a single thing you wrote was correct? Why couldn't you understand the concepts? Why were you always making mistakes?
Your hands began to tremble as you clutched the pen in your hand, your heart beating fast
You wanted to scream out in frustration and ask him why you weren't getting the answers right, but you knew he wouldn't be patient with you anymore.
"You should try harder, I'm going to do an exam on these topics for you all," he said.
And yes, you had to study alone, as you normally did.
But you didn't really understand why you didn't get any answers right.
Literally that's what books said, your answers were even the same.
So, what was happening to you?
That test was going to be in a week, and you were extremely stressed about it.
You had to prepare for the exam given by Ratio, but it wasn't easy. Despite reading the material multiple times, something wasn't clicking in your head.
The formulas, the methods, the diagnoses, nothing stayed in your head. And when you attempted to answer the questions, you found yourself making mistake after mistake.
After studying a few nights on your own, it was time to take the exam.
The day of the exam had arrived.
The atmosphere in the classroom was tense, everyone seemed nervous. You were shaking, your hands trembling as you clutched the pen. Everyone around you seemed to understand the material, but you were struggling.
Ratio started handing out the test sheets to each one of you, until he reached your desk.
He placed the paper in front of you, and your breathing hitched.
You dared to hold your gaze on his, for at least a while, looking for some security that he could give you.
But there was no security in his gaze.
He didn't give you any special look, no secret glance or anything that could make you feel more confident.
His expression seemed serious, almost like a challenge. It was clear that he expected nothing from you, to his eyes you weren't going to do the test well.
He knew it, and you knew it.
And as he finished handing them out, he spoke.
"You have an hour to finish. Start now." He announced, before going back to his desk.
You looked down at the questions, and your heart sank.
They were difficult, they were complex, and they were things you had never seen before.
You felt your hands begin to sweat, and your mind went blank. You tried to recall the information you had studied, but it was like trying to remember a forgotten dream.
The other students around you seemed to have no trouble with the test, they were already beginning to answer the questions.
But you, on the other hand, were stuck on the first question. The words and numbers on the page became a blur, your mind in complete mess.
As minutes passed, you found yourself still struggling with the first question. Meanwhile, other classmates were already on the second or third.
The pressure was immense. You tried to focus, you tried to concentrate. But your mind was racing, your heart was pounding in your chest.
You could hear the sound of the other students' pens on the papers, the ticking of the clock on the wall, the silence of the classroom.
Every sound seemed to echo in your head and only added to your anxiety.
Time was ticking by quickly, and you could feel your anxiety growing with each passing minute.
You had already spent 45 minutes on one question, and you hadn't even reached the halfway point.
Until you saw some of your classmates raise their hand so that Ratio could approach them and answer their doubts about some questions.
They were getting help, while you just sat there, panicking.
You wanted to raise your hand, to ask for help, just like the other students.
But you didn't do it, you didn't dare to. You felt too ashamed and embarrassed to admit that you were having so much trouble with the test.
You just continued staring at the exam, trying to decipher the questions.
And, with only 4 questions out of 20, you dared to raise your hand as well, so that he can get closer as well.
You looked up a little bit on your exam, watching it approach students back and forth.
Your still hand raised, you even moved it a little bit, to see it.
And so he did, he saw you for a few seconds, before approaching another of your classmates.
Your heart sank again.
You couldn't believe what had just happened.
He knew you were struggling, he saw you with your hand raised. But despite that he avoided you and went to answer someone else's doubts.
You felt a pang of pain in your chest, like a stinging realization.
Ratio didn't want to help you, he was ignoring you.
You weren't like the good students, the ones he always said were talented. You were just the one who couldn't understand anything, no matter how hard you tried.
You lowered your hand again, feeling humiliated.
With your cheeks somewhat red from shame, you lowered your gaze towards your exam, almost empty.
You tried to do it, you really tried.
Without realizing it, your eyesight was blurred, as you continued to try to write down what you found most coherent.
You were crying in the middle of the exam. But what a shame.
Well, at least you didn't sob, you just let the tears slip out of your eyes, because because your head was somewhat tilted down, it was more accessible for the tears to come out.
The time passed, and the other students handed in the exam sheets, one by one. And you were still on your seat, trying to come up with at least a minimum of sense.
The tension in the room grew with each passing minute.
You could feel the weight of everyone's gaze, even if no one was looking at you directly. It was like everyone was silently waiting for you to finish, to see if you could do it or not.
But the answer to that was becoming more and more evident with every passing minute.
And yet, you still tried, you tried so hard to write something.
You felt a knot forming in your throat as you tried to hold back your tears, but it was difficult.
Ratio's words echoed in your head again, "You should try a little harder."
How much harder did he wanted you to try? You were already struggling to keep up, and now you were literally crying.
With all your effort, you managed to answer some more questions. But still, the test paper looked almost blank.
Many of your answers were incorrect, even if you had tried your best.
When the time finally ran out, Ratio spoke up.
"Time's up," he said in his usual strict tone, standing up from his desk. "Those of you who haven't handed in your sheets, do so now."
You felt a wave of dread wash over you. You were one of the few who still had the papers on their desk.
Slowly, you raised your head to see that almost everyone else had already handed their papers to him.
With shaking hands, you gathered the papers on your desk and got up.
Your legs felt weak, but you somehow managed to make your way to the desk.
Ratio was there, waiting for your paper. He looked slightly indifferent, as if he was expecting this outcome.
You handed him the sheets with trembling hands, feeling a sense of shame and embarrassment. The weight of your poor performance was heavy on you, and you avoided meeting his gaze.
He took the papers without a word, and as he did, your eyes darted down to the answers on the paper.
You could see his expression of disappointment.
And it was worse than what you imagined.
Red marks and crosses were all over the page, almost each answer was incorrect.
After a week, he returned the exams to everyone in the classroom.
You didn't know how to hide your grade from the students sitting near you.
There was a big 0 on the exam cover.
A 0, no points at all. You had failed the test completely, and the evidence was there, for everyone to see.
The shame and humiliation hit you like a wave. Everyone was looking at their grades, comparing them and discussing among themselves. You wanted to sink into the floor and disappear.
Ratio spoke up again, drawing everyone's attention. "As you can see, the results of the exam were… Disappointing."
He said, his eyes skimming over the class.
His eyes landed on some students, commenting on their good grades.
"But, there were some good grades. Congratulations to those who did well." He spoke, in a matter-of-fact tone.
You knew you'd never be like them.
When he finished the class, it was relatively short, as most of the time it was used to solve the exam together.
You rushed to grab your stuff by keeping your exam in your bag, before you left the big classroom, feeling nauseous.
The rest of the day passed by, but the shame and humiliation from the exam still lingered. You couldn't shake the feeling of disappointment, and the thought that you were the worst in the class.
You tried to avoid your classmates' gazes, fearing they would whisper or make fun of you.
The hours went by slowly, until the day had ended. You found yourself walking back home, feeling down, with your head hung low.
And then, you suddenly heard a voice calling out to you. "Y/N," the familiar voice said, and you froze.
You knew who it was.
Slowly, you turned around to see Ratio standing there, a few metres away from you. His expression was serious, his eyes fixed on you. Your heart started racing again, and you nervously clutched your bag strap tighter. What did he want?
He walked closer to you, his footsteps echoing in the empty hallway.
He stopped a few steps away from you, looking down at you.
"Can I talk to you for a moment?" He asked, his voice firm. You swallowed hard, nodding silently.
You were too afraid to speak, your throat was dry, as if you had never swallowed saliva again.
He motioned for you to follow him, as he walked towards a quieter part of the hallway, where there were less classroms.
Finally, he stopped in a quieter spot, turning to look at you.
He looked directly into your eyes for a moment, his gaze intense.
There was a moment of silence before he spoke, his voice softer than usual.
"I suppose you know why I wanted to talk to you," he began, tilting his head slightly.
You nodded again, knowing what he wanted to talk about. The failed exam.
"Yes…" you whispered, your voice barely heard.
He let out a small sigh.
"Your performance on the exam… It was quite unsatisfactory."
His words were straightforward, he didn't hide his disappointment.
Your heart sank even further.
He was saying what you already knew, what he already wrote on the paper of red marks and crosses.
"I didn't expect much, to be completely honest. But I didn't expect such…bad results." He added, raising an eyebrow.
His words hurt, but you didn't say anything, you just stood there, looking down.
"I just don't understand," he continued, "I made sure to explain the concepts thoroughly. Why did you fail so badly?"
His tone was serious, he really wanted an answer from you.
"I really don't know," you mumble. Ratio let out a small huff, clearly not satisfied with your answer.
He looked at you for a moment, his eyes studying you.
"You know, I've been teaching for years. I've seen many students who struggle, but not to this extent. You weren't able to answer any question correctly."
"I wanted help, Ratio," you said, again, muttering.
And yes, you tried to raise your hand so that he could also approach you that time, but he just looked at you and didn't come close.
You looked up weakly toward his eyes, holding his gaze a few seconds.
"I tried to ask for help from you, I raised my hand, but you ignored me," you confessed, your voice almost breaking.
He was silent for a moment, his expression slightly changing.
He seemed a little surprised that you had mentioned that.
He was about to open his mouth to speak, but then your voice spoke up again.
"Do you think I'm stupid?" You said, with a hurt voice, and your eyes started to feel moist.
His expression softened slightly. He wasn't expecting that question.
He saw the tears forming in your eyes, and his stern expression wavered for a second.
"No, I don't think you're stupid." He finally said, his voice slightly lower.
He paused for a moment before speaking again.
"But I can't deny that I'm...disappointed. I had hoped for more progress."
Your lower lip trembled slightly as you heard his words.
Disappointed. Of course, he was. Because you were the worst in the class, the one who couldn't understand anything no matter how hard you tried.
The one who would never be able to answer a question correctly.
"…I know…" you whispered.
You couldn't hold back the tears any longer, and they started rolling down your cheeks.
"But i'm trying my best. I swear I am," you said, your voice shaking.
Ratio didn't say anything for a moment. He just looked at you, almost as if he was contemplating your words, your expression and your tears.
He watched as you cried softly, the tears running silently down your face.
He seemed to think for a moment, before he spoke again, his voice softer than before.
"I know you're trying," he admitted, and his tone wasn't as harsh as usual.
He let out a small sigh.
"But 'trying' isn't enough. You're always lagging behind. You never catch up. You need to do something different."
Your heart felt heavy, and your shoulders slumped slightly.
He was right, your 'trying' wasn't enough. It never was.
You heard him sigh, before you didn't realize it, his hands were on your cheeks, rubbing his thumbs on these to clean the tears.
"I want you to succeed,"
His touch was gentle, his thumb wiping away your tears softly.
You looked up at him, his expression was serious but not cold as usual.
"But you have to work harder for that." He spoke, his hands still on your wet cheeks. "You're smart, but clearly something is missing."
As his hands continued on your cheeks, you froze, feeling the unexpected touch.
He was wiping your tears, a gesture of… comfort?
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At this point, you already believed his words.
'You're not giving everything about yourself'
'Study more'
'Try harder'
Everything that came out of your mind and mouth was wrong for him.
You sat on the small bench on the rooftop of medical school. That place had been your peacetime.
You found yourself again, frustrated, as you had the book open on your lap, with tears about to escape your eyelids.
That until someone else's footsteps resounded on the ground.
Which made you immediately turn your head.
"I knew I'd find you here," the familiar voice said. You turned to see Ratio, walking over to the bench and sitting next to you.
"The same place, for the third time this week," he added, his expression a mixture of concern and something else.
You wiped the tears from your eyes quickly, not wanting him to see you like this. But it was too late, he had already noticed.
He glanced at the open book on your lap, a small frown on his face.
"Still struggling?" He asked, his voice soft yet firm.
You just nodded.
You saw him sigh, before he took out a kind of sweet bread packaged.
"Here, eat this," he said, as he gave you what he had in his hand.
He knew you liked those sweet breads.
With resignation, you took the bread, and you took off the wrapper, starting to eat it, while you felt like you were going to cry again.
Ratio watched you eat silently, his eyes fixed on you.
He saw the tears still gleaming in your eyes, but you were trying to hold them back.
He let out a sigh, his expression seemed to be contemplating something.
Without saying anything, he moved closer to you, getting nearer.
He was so close, you could count the number of eyelashes he had.
He leaned towards you, and his hand raised to touch your cheek and so he did, stroking your face for a moment, before he laid a kiss on your temple.
The unexpected kiss on your forehead made your body tense up for a moment, surprise filling you.
The action was uncharacteristic as he was acting in a way he never did in the past.
You slowly turn your head to look at him, your eyes meeting his. His expression held a hint of affection.
He was still so close to you. So close that he could easily touch you again.
The simple contact of his, made the accumulated tears of before, fall down your cheeks.
You stuck your body to him, even chewing sweet bread. You had a frown, like you used to have now.
As you put your phone next to you, after dialing your boyfriend's number.
You keep looking at the practice sheet, gently banging the pen against the table.
It took him a few seconds for him to answer your call.
"What's wrong?" Ratio asked once he answered the phone.
You took a deep breath before speaking, trying to sound a little calm, but failing miserably.
"I'm stuck again," you confessed, frustration evident in your voice.
"You'll need to do this by yourself, this time." He said, and his voice was firm.
You felt another stab in the chest.
"But I-"
"No buts. You need to learn how to figure things out on your own. You can't always depend on me."
Another stab. Like a dagger.
Yes, the same thing happened again.
You were somewhat desperate, as your last exams went wrong and you only approved a few with the minimum note. And basically you needed 140 percent of 100 percent to pass.
The only thing that could save you would be the practical part, but you didn't even manage to master that.
You knew he was right, but that didn't make you feel any better.
You looked up at him with a sad expression, but all he did was look at you with his usual frown.
"You're not a kid anymore. You need to start taking responsibility for your own learning," he said.
You knew he was right, you knew you couldn't always rely on him. But it was hard to accept.
Especially when he was always so dedicated and patient with others.
"Being your boyfriend doesn't mean you have more priority or advantages,"
You felt your throat tighten, you had a lump in your throat.
But he continued speaking.
"I'm your teacher, first of all. And I should be as impartial as possible."
You knew that, you truly knew that.
How you wished that he would treat you differently from others just because, you didn't want any privileges, or anything like that.
You just wanted his attention, his help, his care. But all you got were cold remarks, like a teacher talking to a stupid student.
Oh, but you would remember her words whenever you were tempted to ask her for help.
And again, you believed his words.
He was right, it wouldn't be fair for others to teach you the most.
So, you had to put everything in about yourself, no, more than you could give, so you could study for your exams.
Especially because they weren't just any exam, they were almost a preview of the endings, and if you didn't pass all of them, you wouldn't have any hope of being able to pass the courses.
Because you need more note than you can normally get, that is, something impossible.
In total there were 6 courses, that of Ratio and that of other teachers. That in their classes you didn't do so badly, but you weren't the best either. you approved with scores between minimums to media.
You looked down, your fingers tightening on the edge of the desk.
"I know," you mumbled, feeling a lump in your throat.
He was silent for a moment, before he spoke again, his voice a little softer this time.
"I'm tough on you because I know you can do it," he said.
Your eyesight focused on the chemistry test, it was the first exam of the week, so you were, or at least you felt, that you were ready.
When you left the exam, begging you to do well, you had to eat a granola bar, while you were walking down the hallways, looking for your other classroom.
You couldn't see Ratio before you took the first exam, because you were going to be a little late.
Once you sat at the desk, with the pharmacology test in your hands, you started putting on paper the things you remembered, so you didn't forget.
It was two long hours, which you managed to finish and leave the classroom, completely tired.
But when you get home, you couldn't sleep, because you had to prepare for your other exams.
As you sat in front of your desk, it was already almost 10 pm.
And you were still studying.
Your eyes tired because of the many books you had looked through, and your arms aching slightly because of writing so much.
You were tired, but you couldn't afford to take a rest. You had to study for the other exams. You let out a sigh, rubbing your eyes.
How long had you been studying now? An hour or two? You weren't even sure.
In the last few hours, you were studying for your other exams, including Public Health, Medicine 3, Clinical psychiatry, Laboratory diagnosis and the course in which Ratio will be present, Surgery 1.
Of some of those exams, most of them were written, the two of practice would be the same day.
You didn't dare send a single message to Ratio.
Or well, it's not that you didn't want to, you were too tired at this point.
You barely got out of the exam where you had to be in the lab, your eyelids every time threatened to close.
Now you had the exam.
You were scared, you even sweated from your nerves.
When you arrived at the respective practice chirophan, where all your colleagues would be taking the exam, your eyesight discouraged you.
They all looked somewhat tense, as they walked back and forth, muttering to themselves, what you assumed was what they learned in class.
You waited outside, along with them, before Ratio made them pass them all, to start the exam.
This consisted even the right only disinfected was also qualified, which made you tense. Although the cold water when washing your hands and arms helped you wake up a little.
Your breathing intensified.
Ratio stood in the middle of the room, and you tried to focus your vision properly.
He looked in your direction, for a second, his eyes on you.
Maybe he'd noticed how tired you were, but he remained silent. He just looked at you for a second, before looking back at everyone else.
And he began to speak.
"You all know how this works," he began, his voice firm and authoritative. "Each of you will take turns performing on a dummy patient."
You let out a shuddering sigh, trying to calm your nerves.
Your heart was pounding in your chest, as you watched your classmates take turns performing the practical exams.
Every time someone finished, Ratio inspected their work and gave them feedback.
You could see the serious expression on his face, his eyes never leaving the students as they performed.
Finally, it was your turn. You approached the dummy patient, your hands slightly trembling.
Ratio stood a few feet away, watching you.
When you started the exam, you tried to be as perfect as possible.
You tried to calm down, which was a bit difficult. Your hands was shaking.
'Try to breathe slowly, it will help you.'
That was what Ratio told you, and he was always right.
You tried to repeat in your head the steps you had to take to complete the exam.
You took a few deep breaths, in and out.
And finally, you began.
You feel much more pressure when you felt your classmates behind, that you were taking turns with when you performed a simple little surgery.
You started with shaky hands, to make cuts in the internal tissues of the skin, little by little. Being totally attentive to the sound of the cardiac monitor, listening to the pulsations and occasionally seeing the pressure level in the 'patient'.
You could even feel the sweat on the palms of your hands inside the latex gloves. It's good that you always had to put on 2 or 3 for these practices, because otherwise, you would have contaminated everything with your sweat.
You continued the process, trying to block out the thoughts that were flying through your mind.
'You need a good score.'
'You can't fail.'
'This is your last exam.'
'If you do this well, you can finally talk to him without worrying.'
Trying to ignore the pressure, you continued to take each step carefully.
The instructions for your colleagues you should take turns with were clear, anyone who distracts or talks to the person who is performing the practice with the 'patient' will immediately cancel the exam.
And that's why, because of the more impotence or frustration of your peers when they see your patient's heart level when they enter a state of shock because they had touched a vital organ, it was something that went unnoticed by you. Because you had fallen asleep.
What suddenly woke you up was the same alert from the monitors, who let out a loud noise.
Shit.
By the time you saw the monitor, the pressure was in the skies, not to mention that now the pulsations were going down drastically.
Without realizing it, as you had been sleeping in your place, you pricked the 'patient' stomach with the scalpel.
Fuck.
Your eyes widened in shock.
You were still a bit dizzy from sleep, and your reflexes were very slow.
And from behind, you could hear more murmurs, some of your classmates, while others let out a hiss or a swear word. And you could feel the pressure in your chest at what had just happened.
You tried to make a suture, but by that time it was too late.
You had damaged a vital organ, which you shouldn't even do.
In fear, you turned to the monitor, that now the rhythm was a single beep, indicating that the 'patient' had died.
You stayed there, feeling pressured by the looks of your classmates behind you, now they had not been able to take their exam.
And the gaze of Ratio, who was standing in front of you, which only made things worse.
He stood in the same position, his eyes staring at you. And you could only think of what he must have been thinking at that moment.
You tried to remain calm, but you knew that was impossible, your breathing was shaky, and you even felt your legs trembling.
You couldn't stand the stares, you could feel the gazes of your colleagues on your back. Judging and analyzing everything you had done.
"You failed this exam roundly." was the only thing he said, before guiding your peers to another side in the chirophan so they can take their exam, with a heart rate 'patient'.
You felt a pang of panic, your hands still trembling from the previous episode.
'You failed this exam roundly.' those words still echoed in your mind.
You knew it was the truth, there was no way you could deny it. You messed up big time.
'Everyone is going to hate me now. They're all going to think I'm stupid. I'm not fit to be a doctor. I'm not fit to be anything.'
These were the thoughts that raced through your mind.
You had been unveiling yourself so that you could study well for your other exams, that this was the only thing you didn't have in mind that could happen.
Your eyes looked to the floor, you were ashamed, you were embarrassed by your own performance. You had failed at something so simple.
Something you'd studied for hours. You even feel somewhat prepared to be able to do it.
Ratio stayed where he was, watching as your classmates took their turn with 'the patient'.
But he couldn't quite take his eyes off you, he could see you were shaking, and he was sure you would start crying at any moment. But you wouldn't do that in this place, not with the presence of everyone else.
He was heading for a moment where you were.
Without paying much attention to the others, he approached you, his footsteps almost silent, and stopped right in front of you.
He looked down at you, his gaze serious.
He knew exactly what your thoughts were at the moment, he knew that all the blame you would assume would be on yourself.
After all, it was all due to your negligence, you had fallen asleep, and that had been the reason why your practice turned out to be, to say the least, a disaster.
'You tried'
'You can do better another time'
'Don't worry'
You expected that, you really expected it.
"You need to retire from the chirophan, you've finished your exam." That's what you heard from him.
Your heart squeezed.
You really thought he was going to at least say a few words of encouragement, not just that.
And the tone in which he said it just made it worse. It was clear that he was disappointed.
You could feel the lump in your throat growing, you felt that you were going to burst into tears at any moment.
Ratio was about to speak, but instead, he held his tongue.
He knew the effect his words had had on you. He knew you weren't well. But he didn't say anything, he just stood there, seeing you.
His gaze was on you, you could feel that he was analyzing you, from your eyes to your hands.
You looked like a kicked puppy.
Your shoulders were hunched, your head was down, and your hands were shaking at your sides.
With what little dignity you had left, you looked up at Ratio.
Your heart was beating so hard you thought it would burst out of your chest.
Your eyes were glassy, your eyelashes wet with tears.
You moved from your place, going to the disinfection area, while you were removing your gloves, mask and other protection stuff.
Your hands never stopped shaking while you did that.
You came out of the chirophan of practices, with fear running through your body.
Your hands on your face as you tried to hide the fact that you were about to start crying.
You were walking so fast that you bumped into a few people, some who told you to slow down, but you ignored them.
Finally, you reached the bathroom, where you locked yourself in one of the cubicles, and let the tears fall down your face.
You felt pathetic. You felt like an idiot for thinking you could do it, and even more so, for falling asleep.
How could you possibly have screwed up so big? You had studied for hours, for days, for weeks.
You worked as hard as you could to try to get a passing grade.
You had given your all, only for it to end in a complete failure.
"You're not good for this." you told yourself, your voice choked with tears.
You waited for your boyfriend to leave his office, grabbing the strip of your bag with both your hands.
Your gaze was on the floor, seeing your shoes as if they were the most interesting thing in the world. Your red eyes, you didn't want people to see much.
The students walked around you, chatting and laughing, unaware of the turmoil you were going through. You just wanted to go back to your apartment and cry in peace.
But at least you wanted some comfort on Ratio's side, even though you knew you didn't deserve it.
You heard the sound of a door behind you opening, and you glanced up to see Ratio walking out of his office.
He didn't notice you at first, but then he turned and his gaze fell on you.
You heard him sigh heavily, before he spoke "Let's go." It wasn't a question, it was a direct order.
You didn't dare say anything, just nodded silently and walked with him.
The whole way to the exit was silent, you walked behind him, seeing his back.
The silence was heavy, you didn't dare to say anything, and he didn't say anything either.
When you arrived at his apartment he let you pass first.
As you saw him leave his things in place and turn on some lights, your mind was distracted.
Until as he started heating water in the boiler, he spoke.
"It was the worst exam I could see in my life," his voice was full of disappointment.
Your heart pounded in your chest, those words only made you feel worse.
You wanted to say something, some kind of excuse, some reason to justify what you had done.
But all that came out of your mouth was a half-broken murmur "I'm sorry"
Ratio stared at you for a moment, his gaze was cold, you felt like crying again.
"You're sorry?" He asked, almost bitterly.
"You'll tell that to your patients' relatives when you kill them by mistake?"
Your eyes widened, and you could feel your lip starting to tremble.
That was a low blow.
"I-" you tried to speak, but your voice was so shaky and broken that you could barely form words.
But he interrupted you.
"You weren't focused. You were not prepared. You were sloppy and careless" He said, without even looking at you.
His words were like a stab in the heart.
And he wasn't done yet.
"You didn't put any effort into it,"
"Yes I did," you muttered, grabbing your fingers, anxiously in your body.
Ratio turned to you, his gaze was stern and almost irritated. He had never looked at you like that before.
"You fell asleep in the middle of the practice," he said, and the disappointment in his voice was palpable.
"How the hell would you call that putting in effort?"
Your mind was racing, trying to find an answer, something to say. But the words didn't come out, the lump in your throat was too big.
"I did" you tried to say again, weakly.
"No, you didn't" he said bluntly.
"If you had, you wouldn't have made such a stupid mistake"
You couldn't help it again, the salty tears wet your cheeks.
"Yes I did, Veritas," you said, raising your voice a little while you were looking at him.
"You didn't make the slightest effort in that practice, otherwise, you wouldn't have failed so miserably"
Those words stung again, you felt that he was attacking you.
"Yes I did!" You shouted, tears streaming down your face.
"I worked my ass out for that exam. I didn't take anything for granted! I really wanted to pass!"
"I want your comfort," you sobbed.
You wanted him to tell you that you had tried, that you did put everything out of you, that it was just unfortunate situations, that you could try again later.
You wanted that, not this.
Ratio's expression softened a little at your words, and for a moment he almost looked guilty.
He was quiet a few seconds, looking at your tear-soaked face.
"Do you think hard work is enough?" He asked. "Do you think that by just studying you will pass everything?"
"That if you want something, you'll get it just by wanting it?"
You just looked at him.
"That's not how it works," he said firmly.
"You have to be more than that".
You wanted his comfort, you longed for it a lot at times like this, not to be ranted out at how bad you did it.
"You don't deserve to be consoled if you did something out of pure negligence,"
Your heart sank at his words, like he was speaking to a child.
You felt like a scolded dog.
More tears fell on your face.
"I didn't mean to make that mistake," you said, wiping your face with your sleeve. "I really tried"
Ratio approached you, his steps slow and deliberate.
"Trying is not enough" he said bluntly.
He was in front of you now, towering over you, you didn't dare to look at him in the eyes.
"In this profession, just trying is not enough"
"You're not made to be a doctor if you think that," Your breathing hitched.
Those words hurt, you wanted to shout at him, tell him he's not right, that he's wrong.
But you knew he wasn't.
Every word he was saying was true.
All this effort, all these hours you've worked, and all these sleepless nights, to fail like that, because of a stupid simple mistake.
You really were not fit to be a doctor.
Your head was lowered, and the tears still ran down.
You tried to hold them back, but failed.
"I'm tired, Veritas,"
You just wanted him to stop.
You were tired, tired of studying, tired of not getting it right.
Ratio seemed to not soften at your words, his face still showed disappointment.
"You have to try harder, you have to put aside your tiredness," he said firmly. "If you don't, you will fail again"
"If you really want this, you have to do better"
You just wanted it all to stop.
"It's not fair," you began, your voice choked by the crying that didn't stop.
"The only thing you know how to do is tell me bad things about what I do," you sobbed.
"You're supposed to be my boyfriend, not someone who criticizes me,"
You felt frustrated, the words escaping your mouth without a care.
You wanted him to comfort you, to tell you that everything was going to be okay and that you would be a perfect doctor.
But he didn't say anything. He just looked at you, his expression unchanged.
"My job isn't to soothe your ego," he said firmly.
"My job, as a boyfriend, is to help you see the faults in yourself and strive to improve"
"And it seems that you don't like that very much," he added. His voice was almost cold.
You raised your head, looking at him with wet eyes.
"You're supposed to support me" you said weakly, almost a plea.
Ratio's face didn't change, his eyes fixed on you.
"I do support you," he said.
"But I won't lie to you or sugarcoat things for you," he added.
"I don't even have ego or something that you have to soften."
Those words were like a stab to the heart.
"I'm sick of you telling me that everything I do is complete shit,"
You were shaking with frustration, tears and snot streamed down your face. You felt so angry and so desperate that you didn't know what to say.
"I'm just trying to be honest with you and make you face reality," Ratio said.
"You need to be able to handle criticism if you want to be a doctor"
You just wanted him to stop, to shut up and say something like 'you're good' or 'don't cry it's okay'.
But he didn't, he just stood there, telling you the things you didn't want to hear.
You felt like you couldn't hold back anymore, all these days, weeks, months of not saying anything was starting to weigh on you.
"You never say anything good about me," you said in a shaky voice.
"You never have a nice word for what I do"
Ratio raised an eyebrow at your words, unamused by your outburst.
"You don't deserve my compliments"
That stung.
"Especially when you fail so miserably," he added.
Your body shuddered, those words made you feel so bad.
"All other boyfriends say nice things to their partners" you murmured.
"They give their support, even when they make a mistake"
Ratio almost laughed at your words.
"Oh, so you want me to be one of those 'other boyfriends' now?" he said with a hint of irony.
"You want me to pat you on the back and say you did a good job, even when you did a bad one?"
"Do you really think that's going to help?"
His tone was almost mocking, and it made you even more upset.
You wanted to shout at him, tell him that you just wanted him to say something nice and comfort you. But the words wouldn't come out.
"I…"
You tried to speak, but the only thing that came out was a choked noise.
Ratio sighed heavily, the annoyance clear in his expression.
"I can't believe you're acting like a child because you can't handle a bit of criticism"
"Do you really think that's how a doctor should behave?"
"The answers I say are the same as those of my classmates and you still tell me they're wrong," you said.
"It's not fair. I'm fed up,"
Ratio crossed his arms, looking down at you.
"Life isn't fair," he said, as if explaining something obvious to a child.
"And a doctor's job is not to care about being fair"
He looked you up and down, almost with contempt in his eyes.
"I had expected more from you," he said.
"But I suppose I expected too much"
Those words hit you like a blow to the stomach.
You knew he was right, but it didn't make the situation any less painful.
Your hands were clenched into tight fists, your fingers digging into your palms.
"I hate you," you spat out between sobs, your voice full of anger and hurt.
Ratio seemed unperturbed by your words to begin with.
He looked at you with an expressionless face for a moment, before speaking.
"You don't mean that"
You were angry, hurt, and sad, all at the same time.
"I do," you said, your eyes wet with tears.
"I hate you, and I wish you didn't exist"
The words came out of your mouth, more like a desperate plea.
Ratio didn't react at first, he just stood there, looking at you as you sobbed.
"You don't mean it," he repeated, his voice low and firm.
"And you know it"
"Yes I do," you insisted, your voice almost a hiss.
"I hate that you always criticize me," you said, letting out a sob. "I hate that you never say anything nice,"
You saw a slight change in his face through your tearful sight.
Before it becomes the same again.
"If you hate me and you can't stand the criticism I give you," his voice sounded annoying, almost words spit on his face.
"Why don't you retire from medical school?"
"You don't even have the talent to be a doctor anyway,"
You felt your heart drop at those words.
Talent… That was the thing that you always lacked.
Ratio was always the perfect doctor, from the beginning of his studies, he was the top of the top.
You, on the other hand, struggled.
You weren't naturally smart like your classmates or he was. You needed to study more, work harder, make more effort.
And even with all that, you didn't come close to being like he wanted.
You had sacrificed so many things just to get here, your dreams, your hobbies, and even your old friends.
What nice words from your boyfriend.
Both you and he remained silent, with only the sound of the boiling woman whistling.
Your tears fell like waterfalls, but this time you weren't sobbing, you just stared at him.
There was a tense silence between the two of you.
You didn't know what I was thinking, you didn't want to know either.
But you might notice that his facial expression was no longer the firm one before.
He seemed even surprised by his words.
He opened and closed his mouth several times, trying to speak.
But the words not came out.
Ratio was looking at your devastated face, the trail of tears already staining your clothes and cheeks.
Your red eyes stared at him, without blinking. Your expression seemed so different from a few seconds ago.
He had probably crossed the line.
Ratio stood there, looking at your tear-soaked face. He had never seen you so upset, so… desperate.
'Why don't you retire from medical school?'
His words will be repeated as a disc striped on your head.
The seconds passed slowly, the silence was only broken by the sound of boiling water.
Ratio moved slightly, taking a step forward, but stopped when his eyes met your gaze.
That look was almost one of… betrayal.
Something inside him stirred with frustration but guilt at the same time.
You forced yourself to take a breath, because you felt like you were going to drown.
You grabbed your bag with your trembling hands.
As you moved to grab your stuff, your eyesight never focused even on his shoes.
"Y/N…" Ratio tried to speak, his voice was hesitant.
He watched as you packed your things, your movements were jerky and with haste, with the only goal of leaving quickly.
You didn't look at him, avoiding his eyes completely.
"Where are you going?" His voice sounded more pleading, and with a hint of concern.
You felt your body tense, the sound of his voice made you shiver. You had forgotten how long it had been since you heard your boyfriend speak to you without being sharp or harsh.
"I'm leaving," you replied, your voice flat and emotionless.
"Do you care?"
"Of course I care" his voice was firmer than before, and maybe a little annoyed?
Ratio walked closer to you, his steps slow.
"I-, we need to talk"
That phrase came out of his mouth, almost in a pleading tone.
You continued to pack your things, not daring to look at him.
"We can talk tomorrow," you said. "I remembered I have something to do at home,"
Ratio's lips formed a straight line.
He just kept quiet.
You too, until you approached the door.
You felt the weight of his eyes on your back, almost burning.
You had your hand on the doorknob.
It was hard. More than you should.
"Tomorrow, then," he said, quietly.
The way Ratio spoke sounded almost vulnerable.
Your hand trembled on the doorknob.
You wanted to look back, to say something, to see his face.
But you didn't, because you know that seeing him would be even more painful.
"Sure," you managed to say, your voice hoarse.
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The day after your… discussion with Ratio.
You were walking through the corridors of the medical school.
You felt a slight anxiety, but also a sense of resignation for what was going to happen.
You hadn't heard from Ratio since yesterday, and you weren't sure if it was on purpose or not.
As you turned a corner, you saw a familiar figure standing in your path.
You froze for a moment when you saw him.
He was dressed as usual and that perfect hairstyle.
But at least he didn't look so perfect, like he hadn't slept the night before.
His eyes were fixed on you, almost as if he were inspecting you.
Ratio his face neutral as always, but with a hint of… remorse?
"We need to talk," he repeated the phrase from yesterday, his voice low and firm.
Right.
"Oh, right," you let go, feeling your body tighten.
But before he could add anything else, you talked.
"Maybe later?, right now I have a class,"
Ratio had expected you to have a defiant or annoyed air about you.
But your voice, and expression, were calm, almost soft.
"Fine," he said after a few seconds. "Then after class,"
"After class," you confirmed.
Ratio continued to watch you.
The sound of the bell ringing through the hall interrupted the brief moment between the two of you.
not looking directly into his eyes. Then, before he could say anything again, you continued on your way to your classroom.
Ratio watched your figure walk away, his brows slightly furrowed.
Every ticking sound seemed almost as if it was mocking you.
The anticipation making your stomach spin.
In fact, you hadn't gone to a 'class'.
You went to talk to the rector of the medical school.
You felt a lump in your throat, and your hands were slightly sweaty.
You had an idea of what you wanted to talk about.
But you weren't so sure.
Your footsteps echoed through the hallway, your heart beating fast in your chest.
Until you arrived at the office door. You knocked gently and the voice of the rector called you in.
The moment of the meeting was brief, you explained the situation and what you decided. The man listened intently to your words, a slight sense of sympathy in his eyes.
When you finished, he nodded slowly, his fingers tapping on his desk. "Are you sure?" he asked, a hint of concern in his voice.
"Yes," you responded, your voice firm but inside you were the nerves.
You didn't know if you had taken the right decision, but it was done.
"I don't want to question your decision, but-"
"I'm sure" you interrupted him abruptly.
It sounded a little… harsh, but you didn't want to hear any more arguments.
The rector gave a small resigned nod.
"Okay," he said slowly.
"I will start the procedures,"
You walked to where you knew Ratio would be teaching.
You didn't know why you approached, if you were supposed to leave without telling him anything.
Ratio was in the middle of his class when you appeared at the door.
He didn't see you at first, since his back was facing the door.
But when class ended a few minutes later, and everyone left, he turned his face towards the door after leaving his notes on his desk.
And there you were.
Your figure standing in the doorway.
Ratio's facial expression didn't change.
"Is your class over?," his voice was low, the room was empty, the last students had already left.
Which made the only sound a low ticking of the clock hanging on the wall.
Your feet didn't move toward him.
You were still standing by the door, your gaze fixed on the ground.
"Yes," your voice came out somewhat strangled.
For a few seconds Ratio was silent, as if contemplating you.
He started to walk towards you, his footsteps echoing in the room.
The air between the two of you felt almost… thick.
Ratio eventually stood in front of you, his height forcing you to lift your head to look at him.
"Can we talk outside of here?" You asked, something undesirable about your actions.
Ratio was quiet for a moment, staring down at you.
He looked almost… unreadable.
Finally he agreed with a low "sure".
You left the room and both you started walking together.
Neither of you spoke.
Silence.
Just the sound of the two of you walking through the corridors of the school.
Ratio continued to keep pace with you, but he was looking straight ahead, not looking directly at you.
The sound of your footsteps echoed in the empty halls.
As the two of you walked, you felt a feeling of nervousness rise in your stomach.
You inhaled before you asked again. "Can I take your hand?"
As you broke the silence, Ratio slightly turned his head towards you.
He gave a light nod of affirmation.
You reached for his hand, and he allowed you to hold it.
His palm was warm, and the touch of his fingers was gentle, almost firm.
You felt less nervous, just for a while.
You walked with him until you got to a quiet cafeteria, where you saw people studying at tables.
You sat in front of him, making your hand release his.
As you sat down in the cafeteria, Ratio took a seat in front of you.
Both of you stayed silent for a few more seconds.
Neither of you had said anything since you came to this place.
You could feel a tension in the air, the silence slowly becoming unbearable.
Finally, after what seemed like an eternity, he spoke.
"I assume you didn't go to class," his statement sounded like a mere fact.
"Uhm, we can talk about that at another time," you said, playing with your hands a little bit.
You missed the touch of his hand against yours, and you were going to miss that, that's for sure.
"I don't hate you, Veritas," you said, remembering your words yesterday, that you ranted when he was being unpleasant and rude on you.
Ratio's brow furrowed slightly.
He didn't say anything for a moment, he seemed to be thinking about something.
His gaze was focused on you, his eyes studying your expression almost intently, as if he was examining you.
"I know," he said eventually, his voice low and quiet.
Then he spoke again.
"I have to apologize," his words sounded almost reluctant, as if he didn't like saying them.
You could see the muscles of his jaw clenched, he seemed to be struggling with his thoughts and words.
It was clear that he wasn't used to apologizing.
He continued, the words coming out a little hesitant.
"I shouldn't have said those things,"
He paused again, his gaze averting yours for a moment.
Then he spoke again, and his eyes fixed on yours again.
"I was too harsh,"
Ratio's voice was quiet, almost like a whisper.
He was still struggling with those words, you were so used to him insulting you so easily but apparently it was different when he apologized.
Significantly that produced peace of mind in you.
You couldn't help but smile a little, feeling the knot in your throat.
"That's okay," you said.
Ratio's eyebrow shot up, clearly not expecting such a response.
You knew him enough that he probably would have been prepared to receive a scolding or an argument in response.
He was still looking at you, you could see the slight surprise in his eyes.
"That's… it?"
Ratio seemed almost dumbfounded.
"Yes, that's what I needed to hear," you said.
Anyway, you had already started with the procedures with the rector.
Maybe you just wanted to hear his words of apology, but as a good memory.
Ratio's expression changed, it was almost a mixture of relief and confusion. It was almost as if he had expected more resistance from you.
He remained quiet for a few more seconds, continuing to watch you intently.
That you were so forgiving after how he had acted made him feel… strange.
But maybe he shouldn't think too much.
Ratio exhaled slowly, his facial expression returning to its usual stoic and composed state.
"You're too soft, dear," he murmured, his voice low and quiet.
The next day it was the same.
He felt calm, because at least you weren't upset and at least you clarified that you didn't hate him.
It had spent almost 40 minutes of class and you were not there yet, it was strange to him.
Until when you looked for you on campus, where you were supposed to have other classes, you hadn't attended them. Rather, you weren't even on campus.
And, no matter how much he send you a message, it came out that he couldn't contact your number.
Almost recently, he had to come and talk to the rector, about you not coming and you could fail all your other courses. Until he took it upon himself to tell him that you had withdrew from campus three months ago.
Ratio's eyes widened, his facial expression transforming into a look of disbelief. "What?," his voice was low, but with a hint of alarm.
His mind was processing this new information, and it was hard for him to believe.
"They… withdrew three months ago?" His words came out slowly, his heart was starting to race.
Yes, you had taken the decision to withdraw from the medical school.
As much as it looked like a tantrum, you didn't care, maybe he was right.
So you followed his advice.
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educatedsimps · 5 months ago
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— bonus headcanons, iwaizumi hajime
≪ back to fics masterlist
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iwaizumi hajime x gn!reader
a/n: idea dump based on this iwa request (main fic) so this is basically just everything i wanted to put into the fic but i kinda lost the energy and the bandwidth to write everything up to the standard i wanted so now this exists HAHA hope u like this and tysm for reading! :)
headcanons under the cut!
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You remember asking him once, "Hajime, why do you do that?"
And he replied "Do what?" with deadass the most confused look on his face.
"Kiss my wrists and palms all the time," You clarified.
"Oh," He stopped. "Yeah, why do I do that-"
ok so basically, Iwa finds the wrists a very delicate part of the body, and given his experience as a volleyball player, and the nature of his job, he takes extra special care of them.
he remembers his coaches always reminding him and his teammates not to injure their wrists during training, which translates to "YOU BETTER HAVE GOOD FORM WHILE SPIKING, SERVING AND SETTING, DO YOU UNDERSTAND?"
anyway, i think he started noticing wrists when he was in high school, especially since he was seijoh's ace and had to use his wrists a lot to spike. he probably injured his wrist(s) once and has always listened to his coaches ever since.
now that he's a professional volleyball trainer he makes sure that his athletes don't injure their wrists either.
so i think all of this adds to why he pays extra attention to your wrists especially.
bonus if your job requires you to use or rely on your wrists a lot, eg. musician (like me), athletes, surgeon, author, artist, etc... idk.
YOU CANNOT CONVINCE ME THAT HE DOESN'T GIVE THE BEST 👏 FKING 👏 MASSAGES 👏 ON EARTH 👏 and at the end of the massage he'll always kiss your hands and wrists and idk why but it just feels so chivalrous. like ofc it feels intimate when you hold his face in your hands and he plants kisses on your wrists/palms and but sometimes it just feels so chivalrous and gentlemanly ykwim?
OMG WHEN HE PROPOSES TO YOU like after he slides the ring onto your finger AND THEN KISSES YOUR WRIST/HAND AND IT FEELS LIKE YOUR HEART COULD EXPLODE 'cause i know mine would actually explode if he did that.
anyway some instances i thought of adding to the fic (but couldn't cuz i don't have the ability or capacity to write them out well) include:
waking up in the morning together or when you hold his face and kiss his forehead (these two are in the main fic linked above!)
when you're cuddling on the couch after a long day and just watching a show together or napping. if you're laying on him and touch his face he'll 100% kiss your wrists/palms
when he hugs you from behind and you reach up to run your fingers through his hair (like when you're cooking dinner together or something) and he'll pull your hand down to kiss your wrist
when you hug him with your arms around his neck and he catches your wrist before you pull away
when you shower together (SFW, DON'T WORRY) and you're facing each other and he's tilting his head / bending down while you wash his hair or massage his scalp and when you're done washing it he'll give your wrists a gentle kiss before returning the favour
BONUS: when he holds your face in his hands and you decide to give him a taste of his (very sweet) medicine. you’d twist your head to kiss his wrist and then his palm and he'd be BLUSHING because he's usually the one who does that AND HE'S SO CUTE he's like, "hey... you can't do that. i'm supposed to be the one doing that for you." while blushing and smiling and getting a lil shy and everything and HE'S JUST TOO CUTE FOR MY HEART 😭😭💕
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a/n: ok that's all for the iwa brainrot ... i'm kidding, the iwa brainrot will never end. THANKS FOR READING THOUGH and thank you anon for sparking my two week long obsession with iwa once again
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© educatedsimps 2024. do not repost, copy, translate or plagiarize any work from this blog on tumblr or any other platforms. if you do, the simps will hunt you down. likes and reblogs are appreciated!
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ifhybutilovechu · 15 days ago
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Day 25 : humiliation + Day 26: public
ft . Onyankopon
You and Onyankopon were getting ready to go to a party , he watches through the mirror as you do you makeup. You spot him ad raise a brow but he just shakes his head .
As you get finished with you makeup you put your dress asking him to zip up the back , while he does so he peeps you outfit the shortness rubbing him the wrong way "This a little short ma" he whispers in you ear and you scoff playfully thinking he's joking "Boy bye" you say and walk off . Little did you know he was dead serious .
strike 1
he counts in his head as you put on your jewelry "Ok baby I'm done , you ready?" you ask and he nods. On the car ride there you take multiple pictures and tiktoks the short v neck leaving little to the imagination .
When you guys make it there you immediately give him a kiss before rushing off to find the birthday girl he was shocked you didn't even say bye 'strike 2' , your best friend Sasha . "Heyy bitch! you yell while running to give her a hug she so gladly returns ."You finally made it!!" she exclaims before handing you a shot you gracefully take . Y'all immediately make it to the dance floor and she caresses your waist and you grind on her playfully .
You turn around and start throwing it back on her and she catches it all , smacking at your ass while your short dress starts coming up . People start to crowd around cheering and recording , all types of hands coming to get a grab .
Onyankopon and his friend Connie get some drinks as they sit and reconnect . "How u been" Connie asks and Ony sighs "I feel like my girl been trying me lately" he says and Connie burst out laughing "I'm so happy it ain't just been me , Sasha been pushing all my buttons ." As they talk they hear the party getting louder and come to check it out . They walk to the middle of the circle and Onyankopon can feel his blood pressure getting high . You and Sasha shaking ass for the whole too see .
"Ah fuck nah" he hears Connie whispers before he reaches by his waist band and starts shooting into the air . Everybody scatters and before you and Sasha could run off to they grab y'all .
As you ride home you text Sasha trying not to make eye contact with Ony .
You : Girl we so fuckedd
Sasha : yes I'm almost home , shivering in my boots
You : Deadass , shit gotta go
Sahsa : I'm praying 4 u
"Put that phone down" Onyankopon tries to say as calmly as he could and you quickly turn it off. "So?" he asks and you don't answer turning away and you can see him nod his head in the corner of your eye "Aight"
He parks the car and your heart drops notices it's a parking lot. "Get to the back" he says coldly and you immediately crawl back and he presses a firm smack to your as causing a squeak . He turns you around pressing your face into the mattress and pulls up your dress and notices you have no panties on. He reaches his hand back before landing a harsh slap on your ass . You groan and leap forward but he just pull you back , this continues until you ass is red and sore .
"Fuck!" you yelp a tear falling from your eye . He swipes his thumb over your cunt feeling your wetness . "You like that , everyone looking at what's mine? he asks and you shake your head and he smack your ass . "I cant hear you" he says as you whimper "no.."
He lines his thick cock up with your entrance before ramming in. You moan and unconsciously move away for his brutal thrust , he grips your hips and locks you in place "Fuckk , baby I'm sorryy" you beg as your drool pools onto the leather seats . "You too late baby" he says before smacking your eyes "Now throw that shit back on me" you try your best but as you watch someone walk by your trust in the tinted windows didn't seem so high anymore , you smack your head at his stomach trying to push him out. Tapping on his stomach to signal him
"Don't focus on them look at me" he whispers into your ear , gripping on your neck. You throw you ass in circles on his cock and he groans "Fuck baby just like that... you gon catch this nut" he asks "Yes pa..ooh shit!" you say clenching around him as you get butterflies in your stomach . Your hands smacks at the fogged window and tears flood out your eyes , he tightens his grip on your hips to pound into you become you cum all over him . He watches the white ring appear around his cock and groans . thrusting again before cumming deep inside. He looks at you messy makeup and fuck up hair , hearing the squelch from the cum dripping out you hole.
"Maybe you won't act up when you can't go out with a baby on your hip?"
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xxkissesforchanniexx · 7 months ago
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𝐏𝐡𝐨𝐛𝐢𝐚.
Pairing: Felix x fem!reader (non-idol au) Genre: Fluff + Smut Word Count: 4.7k Warnings: mentions of domestic abuse (not by felix), manipulation(also not by felix), comfort, Chan is a fricking bodyguard (not literally), soft!dom lixie, gentle sex
A/N: I put the requests down for a moment, I'll get to them soon but I wanted to write something about Felix since i haven't yet TAGLIST APPS >.>
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You sat up in bed hugging yourself, covered in a cold sweat, traumatized. He's gone. You mutter to yourself, yet you still find yourself locking your bedroom door, you still find yourself calling Chan.
He sat with you until you calmed down, until Changbin came with food for you and gave you a bearhug.
Chan returned to the apartment he shared at 11am, Changbin trailed behind him tiredly.
"Is she ok?" Hyunjin asked, standing up from where he sat with Jeongin and Felix.
Chan nodded slowly, "Y/N was sleeping when we left."
"When that dick gets out of prison, I swear I'll kill him." Jeongin huffed.
Felix looked at his friends, "What?"
"It doesn't matter to you." Hyunjin said simply.
"You don't know her." Chan said, walking to his room.
Changbin sat on the couch. "She's not good with new people recently."
Felix nodded to himself, looking at his hands. Changbin stood and went to his room.
"Jeongin." Felix nudged his friend.
"Huh?" Jeongin looked up from his phone.
"What are they talking about?" Felix asked quietly.
Jeongin opened his mouth then closed it. He said softly, "It's not my place to say anything."
Felix hummed softly. "Who's Y/N?"
"Friend of Chan and Changbin."
"Oh."
You hummed softly to yourself as you dragged yourself out of your bed and into the hall, you went to the kitchen and opened a cabinet staring at the empty shelf.
"Great. No (fav snack).." You sighed, turning back to your bedroom and entering the connected bathroom. You tried to make yourself look semi-decent before pulling on your hoodie and sweatpants. You grabbed your wallet and left for the convenience store up the street. You entered and grabbed a small basket, heading to the snack isle and practically clearing the shelf of all of your favorite snack. You noticed a very interesting looking drink and settled on buying a 12 pack.
You set the stuff on the register and pulled out your card, scanning it on the machine. It buzzed loudly, your brows furrowed. "Wha-"
"Ma'am your card declined." The cashier said, taking the bag of your snacks to the other side of the counter and putting them under to return later.
You sucked in a sharp breath.
"I've got it." Someone said behind you.
You looked at a man with a gentle face and blonde hair, his eyes were big and brown and they sparkled when he smiled at you. He slid his card across the counter along with his stuff. He pushed his bleach blonde hair out of his eyes and hummed.
The cashier nodded adding the man's charge to your own before scanning the card and handing it back to the man, "Have a good day."
You took your snacks and headed for the door. You moved for the door about to leave, and the man held it open for you, walking with you as you exited the store.
"Thank you." You said plainly.
"No problem," He said, still walking with you.
You tensed. "Thank you really. You don't have to follow me around."
Felix sucked in a breath, "I-"
You huffed and walked past your apartment, deciding to just be safe before you circled around the block and came back to your apartment building. When you came back to your apartment you threw the snacks on the counter in the kitchen and grabbed one with a drink before returning to your bedroom sanctuary. You picked up your phone and scrolled through your contacts, you clicked Jisung's contact and put it on speaker.
it rang only twice before he answered.
"Y/nnie are you ok?" He asked the moment he answered, "I can come over-"
"Don't. I wanted to spill some tea about my day." You laughed.
He was quiet for a moment and then you could hear the smile on his face as he spoke, "What happened, girly?"
After a month, you mustered up enough energy to get in a cab and go to Chan's apartment alone. You saw the look of shock on Changbin's sleepy face when he opened the door to see you holding take out.
"Y/N?" Chan came out from his room, confused.
"Hey Binnie, Channie." You held up the food, "Hungry?"
A small smile came to Chan's face.
You were eating your food when Chan's phone started ringing.
He looked at it and answered after a moment, "Yongbokkie.... Come over? I have a guest right now... Ah... I mean... Okay. See ya."
Chan looked at you, "Friend of mine is coming over."
Changbin looked up from his food, "Chan-"
"It's fine." You hummed.
What you hadn't expected or been exactly happy about was that the friend Chan had allowed over was that Felix guy you'd met at the store.
He wore a black hoodie and sweatpants, his long blonde hair still falling in his face, except now you noticed, he had freckles.
"Oh-" he smiled at you. "We meet again."
You pursed your lips. "Hi."
"You know each other?" Chan looked confused.
"I helped her out a while ago." Felix said dismissively.
Chan nodded slightly. "Uh- What do you want to do now-"
You stood, "I should really go."
Chan sucked in a breath, "Y/N. You just got here-"
Felix looked at you, finally able to put a name to your face, he noticed the dark clouds behind your gaze and looked down.
"I'll come by another day Chan." You grabbed your jacket and left before he could stop you.
What were the odds that guy knew Chan.. That Felix guy who made you feel weird... who followed you so closely when you'd met him. Weirdo. You thought.
You were minding your business and your phone rang.
"Baby.. I need to talk to you sweet girl. I miss you.. "
You hung up and threw your phone. You stared around frantically. Suddenly your apartment felt so unsafe.
You locked your bedroom door and grabbed your phone from the floor, blocking the number. How did he get your number?
You called Changbin but it went straight to voicemail.
You looked out your window and called Chan.
It only rang once before someone answered. The voice wasn't Chan's.
"Hello?" Felix's voice came through and you burst into tears.
"WHERE'S CHAN!?"
"He forgot his phone, he went out an hour ago- Are you crying- What's wrong?"
You hung up abruptly and called Changbin again.
An unknown number called your phone and you stared at it for a long moment.
You hesitantly answered and that voice again.
"Y/N. Come on. Y'know I wouldn't hurt you on purpose, it won't happen again. Tell me where you are, let's talk about it."
You bit your lip as you listened to Suhmin talk.
Chan's number called you again.
"Baby. Answer me, where are you right now?"
You stared at Chan's contact at the top of your screen... It wasn't Chan...
"Y/N! Don't make me ask again!"
You don't know why you did, but you hung up and answered Chan's number.
The deep voice that came from the other end comforted you..
"Y/N. Are you okay? Why were you crying?" Felix asked.
"4th floor, apartment 7, Dreamscape Flats, Straight Lane." You blurted, before muttering. "Please.."
Felix was quiet for a moment before saying, "I'm on the way."
When Felix got to your apartment and found the door unlocked, he was in full right to think something had happened. "Y/N!" He entered and looked around, your apartment was small and tidy.
Felix ran around looking for you before he heard your voice.
"I'm here."
He ran to the sound and tried to open the door, finding it locked. "Are you okay?"
You were standing in front of your door, "Yeah."
"What happened?"
"I-" You closed your mouth.
"You?" Felix leaned against the door.
"I'm scared." You said softly.
Felix didn't ask why. He just sat outside your door on the floor of your apartment. You didn't say anything either, and just sat there on the other side.
"It's okay." Felix said quietly, leaning his head against the door.
"What?" You asked.
"It's okay to be scared." Felix said, "I get scared too."
"It's not like that."
"Big fear? Haunting fear?" Felix sighed, "I fear hurting people, losing people. It keeps me up at night. I get it."
Silence.
"Did Chan ever tell you the time he showed me how to play Uno?" he said after twenty minutes as if nothing was wrong.
"No."
"I didn't know how to play then, so when I had a draw two obviously i had to back it up with a draw four card."
You turned to listen better.
"So I was all like 'Pick two more.' and Channie said, 'Pick up four." and AHH.. I used my draw four. And Chan had a draw 4 as well. He was like 'Pick up... 12!' OHH I hated Uno for a good minute and a half." He laughed lightly.
You giggled.
Felix smiled as he heard your laugh.
The door to your apartment opened and Chan and Changbin stood in the doorway.
"Yongbokkie?" Chan looked confusedly at Felix.
The blonde man stood and knocked your bedroom door. "Chan and Changbin are here. I'm leaving."
You unlocked your door and smiled, "Thank you for coming.."
Felix smiled at you, "Anytime."
Chan and Changbin looked at each other with even more confused looks.
You looked at your friends. "Where were you guys?"
When you came around Chan's apartment, more often then not Felix was there. You learned several things about him then, Felix made amazing brownies, he was a living ray of sunshine, and he could imitate a mosquito, much to your annoyance.
Felix was in your apartment, buzzing to annoy you... just because...
"If you don't stop buzzing I'll swat you like a mosquito." You said, eyes narrowing.
Felix laughed and smiled. "I think that would hurt a lot, and I would not like it."
You rolled your eyes and slapped his hand gently.
He fell over faking death.
Your doorbell rang and Felix looked at you.
"I'm not expecting anyone else." You stood and went to open the door but something deep down told you no...
Your hand froze at the knob.
"Y/N." Suhmin's voice came through the door. "Who is that with you?"
You sucked in a breathe and stumbled back, "No-"
Felix moved to your side, "Who's there?"
You looked at his face, it held an expression you hadn't seen on him before, and one you hoped to never cause.
"I should ask you that." Suhmin's voice came again, "Why are you in my girlfriend's apartment?"
You shook your head, opened your mouth but no words came out.
Felix hesitantly touched your shoulder, You flinched in fear, eyes wide.
Felix smiled at you gently, "Get back."
And before you could stop him he opened the door. Kang Suhmin stood there glaring at Felix.
"Talk to me." Felix smiled.
Suhmin pushed past Felix and bull charged for you, shouting, "I get arrested and you start dragging other men into your place?!"
You flinched as he screamed at you.
"Huh? Answer m-" Suhmin was cut off as Felix grabbed the back of his collar and pulled him away from you, shoving him.
"Y'know I hate to be some to accuse others. But I think you're an abuser."
"You pretty faced punk." Suhmin raised his hand to hit Felix who just stood there, waiting.
"KANG SUHMIN!"
Suhmin jumped in fear.
Chan stood at the end of the hall of your apartment floor. "What do you think you're doing?!"
You collapsed to your knees and started hyperventilating.
Felix ran to you and shook you a bit. "Breathe."
Suhmin ran off as Chan ran down the hall.
"I shouldn't have- He's going t-"
"Nothing." Felix said. "He won't touch you..."
You looked at Felix for a long time.
He smiled gently, "Not while I'm here."
"I don't like going out.." You muttered.
Felix mad a face. "You have to try, plus the place I want to take you isn't crowded."
You reluctantly agreed to go. Felix hadn't lied, the park he'd taken you was almost empty, he led you to a big tree on a hill from there you could see everything in the park.
"I wanted to bring you because the sunset is beautiful here." Felix smiled, eyes scanning the park, "And because the ice cream here is good."
You laughed as Felix led you down the hill to the ice cream vendor.
Felix got strawberry and you got (flavor), you wondered around the park a bit, looking at the little ducks in the pond. Felix led you back up the hill as the sun set, you marveled at the pretty oranges and purples.
Felix smiled at you, taking in the beautiful astonished look on your face. "The stars look amazing from here too."
You looked at Felix, "How did you find out about this?"
"Chan and I used to explore a lot.." His eyes met yours, "Thought you'd like it."
"I do.." You looked up at the sky as the stars became visible. "Someone told me a while ago, the stars that shine the brightest are people who let go of fear. I wish I could be a star like them, fear nothing."
Felix watched tHe way you gripped the grass. He hesitantly put his hand on yours. "What exactly are you afraid of.."
You looked at him, "Hurting."
It was half past midnight, Felix was half asleep when you called him. He fumbled to answer and sat up, "What's wrong.."
"Can you come over.."
Felix looked at the time, "gimme 20 minutes."
Felix knocked on your door before his phone buzzed. He looked at the text you'd sent, "The key is under the mat."
He smiled slightly and unlocked the door, slipping the key back under the mat before entering and closing the door behind him. He walked around and came to your bedroom door, "Y/N..?"
"Come in."
Felix opened the door and saw you sitting there, in sweat pants and a big t-shirt. "Are you okay?" He asked softly.
You didn't answer for a long second before, you patted the bed beside you.
He sat beside you, looking at you.
"I... I had a nightmare." You whispered.
"About?" He tilted his head.
You hugged your pillow. "I- He-"
Felix smiled gently and wrapped his arms around you. "The guy who came here a while ago?"
You nodded, head resting against his chest, listening to the deep vibration of his voice.
Felix squeezed your shoulder gently. "He can't do anything to you. I won't let him." He rubbed your shoulder gently and after a moment you said quietly.
"It was 3 years ago, Suhmin and I were dating and he used to hurt me."
Felix didn't say anything.
"He never hit me, just... even if I didn't want to do it, he'd make me. And it would hurt."
Felix squeezed you and whispered, "And you stayed..?"
"Where was I supposed to go? He cut me off from everyone... he made me think it was normal." You went quiet.
Felix looked at you. "You don't have to say..."
"I told Chan. I hadn't seen him or any of the guys in months... And my friend Jisung confronted him. Suhmin attacked him."
Felix exhaled slowly.
"And Chan beat the crap out of him for it, and got him arrested. When he came the other day, I was so confused..."
"If he comes again, he's not getting far, I might beat the idea of a restraining order into him." Felix said quietly.
You looked up at him. "Stay."
Felix sucked in a breath.
"Please..?"
"Okay..."
Jisung bounced with Chan to your apartment, Chan unlocked the door and his brows furrowed, it was very, very quiet.
Chan opened the door to your bedroom and blinked in shock for a moment before smiling slightly.
JIsung was about to gasp loudly, but Chan covered his mouth and shook his head.
You were dead asleep, snuggled close to Felix who held you against him.
Slowly Chan closed the door and smiled at Jisung. "I guess we should go."
It was late into the morning when you finally woke up. Your brows furrowed as you felt someone hugging you. Then the memory slapped you in the face. You carefully pulled away from Felix and looked at his sleeping face, so calm and pretty.
You started moving to get out of bed when a deep voice (deeper than usual said, "You're awake.."
"I just woke up." You looked at Felix, his eyes were still closed.
"I woke up a while ago but I didn't want to disturb you. You looked like you needed the rest." He said, opening one eye and smiling sleepily.
You smiled, "Thank you."
Felix sat up, "I have to go see Chan later, you okay on your own?"
You looked at Felix and made a face.
He laughed slightly and got up to leave, you walked with him to the door and your eyes met.
He smiled gently, leaning in and kissing your cheek gently. "Call me if you need."
You felt your stomach jump and you heart fluttered. You nodded and ushered him out.
You sat on your couch and called Jisung, biting you nail.
"You're awake?"
"What-"
"Your angel faced lover boy with you?" He asked teasingly.
"YOU WERE IN MY APARTMENT??!"
"And Chan- we were going to take you out for breakfast but considering the situation, we decided against it."
You face went red and you said quietly, "I trust him Ji.. I trust him a lot."
You heard Chan's voice on the other end, "I would too!"
"AM I ON SPEAKER???!!"
Jisung cackled and you hung up, rolling your eyes.
You looked at the ceiling and smiled.
Felix sipped his juice and avoided Chan's eyes, fearing he might end up laughing.
Changbin stared him down slowly. "How did you do it?"
Felix finally looked up, "Do what?"
Hyunjin leaned back in his chair, "You guy didn't- did you?"
"NO!" Felix looked back at his juice as the rest of the men laughed.
Minho nudged him gently. "Y/N hasn't interacted with guys outside of us very well at all since what happened."
"She didn't interact well with me in the beginning but I couldn't judge her without understanding." Felix said spinning his straw.
Chan smiled, "I trust you Yongbokkie."
Felix smiled at his friend.
Jeongin smiled at Felix, "and if Suhmin appears beat the crap out of him."
"Since when did you condone violence??!" Hyunjin shrieked.
"Since he hurt her." Jeongin said matter-of-factly.
Jisung shook his head, "Yongbok... as long as she's happy."
Felix thought about what you'd told him, normal.. to be in pain like that.. He exhaled slowly.
Felix was sitting on your couch, your head rested on his lap as you slept. He smiled and stroked your hair, his eyes flicked to your phone as he heard your ring tone and he carefully grabbed it from beside you.
Unknown Number.
He answered.
"Sweetie. Can we talk? I'm sorry. That guy in your house, who was he that day? I won't get mad... Hello? Y/N?"
"Ah." Felix said.
The man on the other end of the line went quiet.
"She's sleeping. Don't call her again, it doesn't take that much to put someone back in jail for abuse."
"Are you threatening me?"
"Depends on how you take it." Felix said, he looked down at you and smiled.
"So what? You're her new boyfriend?"
"Is that a problem..?" Felix asked, eyes narrowing.
Suhmin laughed on the other end of the line. "Me and Y/N never broke up. You should leave before I get there."
"I found a vacant place in her heart, I wanted it, I took it. Come get me if you want. I'm waiting."
"Y-"
Felix hung up and smiled gently at you.
"Who were you talking to...?" You asked sleepily.
"No one important."
You were about to leave your house to go to Jisung's, Felix was coming to get you.. You opened the door and flinched, Suhmin stood there looking at you, "Sweetie." He reached for you but you stepped back.
"Don't touch me."
His eyes narrowed. "Y'know someone told me that you told them I was manipulating you. You ran around telling people that?"
"Suhmin no-" You took another step back.
"Are you scared of me? What? You think I'm going to hurt you? I told you it wasn't on purpose-"
"Leave."
"Y/n."
"Get out." He walked into your apartment and you shook your head. "Leave!"
He reached for you and you cowered out of his reach. His brows knit together in anger. "Really? Is that the idea you have in your head? That I'm hurting you?!" He grabbed your arm roughly. "Huh?! Where's that boyfriend of yours?! All talk on the phone! WHERE IS HE!?"
You flinched.
"If you touch her," There was so much venom lacing the voice you looked up in fear. "I'm going to kill you."
Suhmin let go of you and turned to face Felix.
You stumbled back and started hyperventilating.
Felix's eyes narrowed at Suhmin. "Try me."
Suhmin stiffened.
"Get the fuck out."
Suhmin turned to you, then looked at Felix before huffing and running out.
Felix ran to you and grabbed your hands. "hey... hey.." He took your face gently in his hands. "It's me. Breathe."
You nodded and started taking deep breaths.
"Good.." Felix smiled gently, "Did he hurt you?"
You shook your head and swallowed.
Felix released you and looked at his lap. "I'm so sorry.."
"You didn-"
"I provoked him, I'm so, so, so sorry.." Felix didn't look at you.
You grabbed his face and made him look at you, "You didn't do anything wrong..."
"You could've gotten hurt."
"Am I though?"
He shook his head slowly.
"Then why are you sulking..." You gave him a small smile, "You saved me."
Felix stared into your eyes.
You felt the heat rushing to your cheeks.
He leaned close, his hand gently caressing your cheek as he moved closer, breath mingling with yours as he breathed. "Can I kiss you?"
You nodded and he pressed his lips against yours. You blushed deeply as he pulled away.
"I don't know who taught him anything, but love isn't supposed to hurt... Let me show you?"
You stomach did a flip and you stuttered. "I- Y- No- But- I c-can't."
Felix tilted his head and smiled, "A smart woman told me not too long ago 'the stars that shine the brightest are people who let go of fear', I wonder when she'll join them.."
You looked into his eyes, "I.."
"We can stop if it's too much or if it hurts..." he said quietly, "If you'll let me."
When he kissed you this time, you gasped softly as his hand slipped around your waist, drawing you closer. He took the opportunity to push his tongue into you mouth, your tongues clashed fr a brief moment before he squeezed you, smirking against your lips as you whimpered. He pulled away and whispered, "This all for me, sunshine?"
You looked away face flushed.
"Oh, don't hide baby," He turned your head to face him and kissed you again, "I'm going to go slow."
He'd placed you gently on the bed and gotten on top of you, just admiring you for the longest time.
You avoided his gaze.
"Are you nervous?" He laughed lightly.
You nodded. "It's been a bit."
"I'm nervous too.. But I've got you, sunshine." He leaned down and kissed you, his mouth moving to your jaw before going lower to your neck. Hands moving beneath your shirt.
You gasped softly as his tongue drifted across your collar and his dark eyes met yours, "Can I take it off?"
You nodded and he pulled your shirt off, carefully removing your bra and whispering, "So pretty."
You blushed and he kissed your chest, he moved and sucked your right nipple between his lips, pinching the left gently. He groaned softly at the soft moans that left your lips before he pulled back, "So sensitive... It's cute."
You looked away and he chuckled kissing down your belly and pausing at the waistband of your pants. He looked up at you for permission and you nodded slowly.
He pulled you pants off slowly and exhaled slowly as he removed your pantie. "This is mine, for me.." he breathed a laugh and grabbed your hips, dragging you towards him.
You squealed, "Oh god-"
He looked up at you, his pupils blown, angelic face looking at you with an expression that read desire and affection... you hid your face.
He laughed and rested his head on your thigh, soft blonde hair, draping over your skin. "Look at me."
You looked down at the blonde haired man and swallowed.
He kissed your thigh gently and pulled his shirt off, before moving before moving between your thighs and kissing your clit gently.
"Felix ple-" You moaned as he licked your clit, the stimulation zipping down your spine before he sucked it into his mouth.
You jerked and grabbed his hair, he groaned into you as you pulled. "Greedy." He muttered, gripping your thighs and drawing you into his mouth, you moaned and whined.
You squirmed and jerked, letting out an embarrassingly loud moan as he slipped a finger into you.
He laughed lightly and continued his ministrations, his thumb making a figure 8 on your clit as he applied just enough pressure. You squealed as he pushed in another finger, covering your face in embarrassment as he moved back over you, middle and ring finger pumping slowly as he took to grinding his palm on you.
"Who said you could hide? Look at me honey.." His voice was deeper and huskier with lust.
You looked up at him and your heart fluttered.
"Is it too much?" he whispered.
"N-No.."
He smirked and raised a brow. "So it's not enough?"
You tried to protest but his fingers moved faster, pushing in deeper, you let out a guttural moan as he found your g-spot and assaulted it with his fingers.
"Are you close?" He asked, looking down into your eyes.
You nodded and moaned.
"Use your words..."
"Yes, Felix, please!"
He groaned, and started rubbing your clit. "Good girl."
You felt the knot in your abdomen snap and your vision went white for a moment, body stiffening and mouth falling open in a silent scream.
You whimpered as you came down from your high. Felix cooed softly, "Did so well, so pretty when you cum..."
You watched as Felix took off his pants and boxers, his length slapped against his abdomen and you stared at him for a moment.
He looked at you, "We don't have to-"
"I want to." You whispered.
Felix's eyes darkened and he got onto the bed and caged you in. His eyes raked over your body before they met yours and he kissed you gently, positioning himself at your entrance and pushing in slowly.
You moan softly and hold onto him tightly, his blonde hair fell around his face, he groaned deeply as he began moving slowly. It was a burning sensation you were familiar with, but the burn felt good... the slow, gentle drag of his hips as he kissed your neck and shoulder.
You moaned softly as he continued thrusting into you slowly. His mouth moved to find yours, swallowing your quiet cries.
He pulled away panting, pressing his forehead against yours. "I'm going to cum.."
You moaned and whispered, "Not inside..."
Felix groaned and threw his head back, forcing himself to pull out before he came inside. He jerked himself a few times and let out a strangled whine as he came on your stomach.
He kissed you gently and went to your bathroom, getting a cloth to clean you with. You relaxed as he pulled you close.
"I didn't hurt you right?"
"No.." you said quietly.
"Good." He breathed. "I love you.."
You gave him a soft smile and pressed closer. "i love you too.."
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@juskz
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greenlaut · 7 months ago
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death of the divine ✸
as your flatter talk shivers down my spine i hear the Holy One exposing all the lies (Lord, forgive me, i know my flesh needs to die) x
baal / lucifer / michael from angels before man and angels & man by @nicosraf
close-ups + work progress under the cut
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og sketches
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cleaned up sketch (i can't perceive my own messy sketch's coherency ok)
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1st version. didn't like how thick the lineart and the colour palette isn't clicking with me. is so i scrapped it. decided i want to do frame/illuminated manuscript thingy so i added frame and re-centered michael.
i kind of winged it for the final version, so i don't have progress of me picking colour palette or compositions. idk how i did it, i just did it, it was hard. i had a bad day so i blanked out the entire day to just lose myself in this illustration. and then uh. tada.
now some close-ups:
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and some notes:
i know i want lucifer's skin to come across as "gold", so i keep picking his colour in the orange spectrum. bcs yanno--the sun (morningstar). naturally baal is more red leaning, which i think also suits his lion associated imagery well (because lion -> strength card (in tarot deck) -> red. idk, it's how my brain is)
originally michael doesn't wear an armour. i decided last minute to put him in one because fuck it; (1) armour cool and (2) i am a masochist ig
both baal and lucifer wear lipgloss. this is entirely dedicated to rafael's (the author. not the angel.) suffering. they share lipgloss by kissing, you fools.
michael has "jellyfish" hairstyle because. the front bob kinda reminds me how catholic friars/monks in certain schoolings cut their hair in that bob hair? yknow the one?? ya?? anyway it's for that imagery.
both baal and lucifer's legs are caging michael. bcs they're what ground him (vices/temptations) ahahahahaa
i actually asked rafael (author not the angel) and he said he imagined baal is a brunette, which is the same like i had in mind. except that baal asked that he got depicted as a wizened old man/wizard. so now he gets a beard and his hair is white. (he also insisted i gave him a stylish beard)
if u look closely at the jewelries the demons wore; one of lucifer's rings and baal's visible earring have gemstones the colour of michael's eyes
in return, michael's sash is the colour of the demons
baal has a ring with heliodor (yellow) for lucifer, and lucifer has a(nother) ring with red ruby for baal
baal's other gemstones are topaz and lucifer's are yellow jasper
both demons have pearl necklaces. they're supposed to represent michael('s wings ahahahahahaahaha)
my headcanon is that michael's wings are brown like sparrow's actually. BUT during the war, god gave him more power and authority and my understanding is that he got tempered into a perfect sword; so his wings turned white. when book 3 came out and they finally bang (I FUCKING HOPE THEY DO. RAFAEL. THIS IS FOR YOU RAFAEL.) his wings will turn brown againehehhehe
lucifer's coat has wing-like cut at the ends to represent his no longer existing wingsbye
michael is blue because one time i shared this imagery with rafael; michael wearing blue because of the same reason virgin mary is depicted in blue. god's favourites are in blue; fated to suffer and be left behind.
fin.
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brummiereader · 1 year ago
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PREVIOUS PART
Hopelessly Devoted (PART TWO)
Summary: After spending the whole night finishing the documents Tommy had asked for the previous day, you woke up confronted by his cold demeanour once against. Your heart only breaking further when you had to sit through his birthday celebration at the Garrison opposite the new barmaid he was now seeing. If that wasn't enough, you watched on as the one thing you never thought would get replaced did, when Tommy was given a birthday gift in a small box.
Warnings: Language, angst, fluff, mutual pining
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"Wakey wakey, rise and shine" Arthur said as he stood in front of your desk with a huge grin on his face. " You're a bloody snorer" he chuckled as he dropped the accounts book that was sitting amongst the various documents on your desk right next to your head in attempts to wake you again.
" Fuck sake" you mumbled, your whole body jolting at the loud noise as you reached your hand out pushing the book away from you. " I don't snore" you said with a grunt as you slowly lifted your head from the papers beneath you, one of them awkwardly stuck to the side of your cheek which Arthur took no time in ripping from your face, leaving you with a lingering sting. With a cheeky smirk playing on the corner of his lips he looked back at you and the glare you was sending his way, knowing how much you desperately wanted to return the favor, but thankful that you hadn't enough energy to do so in your sleep deprived state.
" Late night?" he asked picking up your half empty glass of whisky, swirling it around before downing the rest. " Brrr fuck! That'll put hair on your balls" he said grimacing at the sharpness from the bitter liquor. "Not that you would know, since you know, you don't have..."
" Ok Arthur shut up, I get it " you interrupted as you rubbed the side of your neck feeling the soreness of the uncomfortable position you had slept in all night start to set in.
" You gonna tell me what you were doing here all night then?" he asked as he perched himself on the edge of your desk looking to you then back to all the workers now making their way through the betting shop.
" Tommy wanted me to finish these" you said as you collected the documents in front of you, your eyes quickly darting to his face knowing what his reaction would be. " Deadlines today Arthur..." you said as he slowly nodded his head, rubbing the side of his nose with his thumb. " He asked me because I'm the only one that will finish it on time" you added trying to convince him and yourself you hadn't become a complete push over. " Please, just don't. Don't say it" you said before he had a chance to reply, turning your head away as you tried to fight back the tears now welling in your eyes, knowing full well how pathetic you had become in your desperate attempts to please his brother.
" Come on love" Arthur said as he placed his hand firmly on your shoulder trying to comfort you in his own way. "Where's that girl I used to know ay? She would've kicked him in the balls already, or at least told him to fuck off if he asked her to stay an extra five minutes let alone a whole night" he chuckled trying to make you laugh as a small smile broke free from your lips.
" There you go" he said giving your shoulder a small squeeze as Tommy walked in, quickly turning the mood sour again. Bringing your head down in embarrassment at your show of emotions you frantically brushed away your tears, hiding yourself from his piercing glare.
" Those papers done?" Tommy said walking through the betting shop as Polly followed behind. No greeting, no smile, cold as ever. This was the Tommy you had now become accustomed to since his return from France, since your break up.
" Hello would be nice " Arthur replied for you. " You know, good morning, how are you? Oh I'm fine Tommy, bloody fantastic!" Arthur said as he stood up gesturing with his hands whilst his brother ignored his theatrics.
" Have them on my desk in ten minutes" Tommy replied slamming his office door, pulling the blind down.
" Birthday boys in a mood" Arthur said turning back to you as you sent him a small nod, the smile he had managed to coax from you having left the moment Tommy walked through the door. " Coming for a drink tonight?" Arthur asked as he walked back in front of your desk, forgetting or purposely leaving out the fact those drinks would be for Tommy's birthday. " Me and you Y/N we'll have a little dance, that'll cheer you up" he said mimicking a waltz all by himself as Polly turned around from the pot of boiling water she was pouring, her eyes widening in horror at Arthur's dangerously swaying hips.
" Jesus Christ, you're putting me of my tea" she chuckled as she walked over with a cup for you. "You'll end up in hospital dancing with him, he's all legs and arms " Polly said as Arthur stopped to look at the blank expression on your face, unresponsive to any attempts he desperately made to get you to laugh.
" Would you lot stop fucking around and get to work!" Tommy yelled from his office as he slammed his newspaper on the desk in front of him.
" Bloody party pooper, ay Y/N? " Arthur laughed trying to cheer you up once more as a smile finally reappeared on your lips lighting his eyes up in accomplishment. You could always count on Arthur to try and cheer you up. You and everyone else in the betting office were convinced he had made it his life mission to get at least one smile or laugh from you a day, even if it meant ridiculing himself at your expense. " Yes Sergeant Major" Arthur saluted as he opened Tommy's office door, the huff of a response from his brother loud enough to remind everyone just how much of a mood he was in or more specifically, the year long mood he had been in with you.
Sitting in front of your desk you collected all the papers in your hand placing them neatly together in a file, nervously biting your bottom lip as you glanced up to Tommy's door. Quickly looking around the room you turned away from everyone as you pulled out a small mirror and lipstick from within your handbag. Dabbing a small amount onto your fingers you brushed the cherry red gloss onto your lips, rubbing the rest into your cheeks to give your self a rosy glow. God you was pathetic you thought to yourself as you closed your compact mirror, the loud snap of it shutting inadvertently snapping you out of your pitiful attempts to look nice for him. But yet you continued in your endeavour to make yourself look more presentable as you pushed your fingers through your hair, taming your rebellious locks into something more orderly than the birds nest currently framing your face. Placing the folder under you arm you stood up heading for his office, head held high, summoning as much confidence as you could.
" I know you're up to something Thomas. Billy Kimber..." Polly was saying when you opened the door and she and Tommy turned to look at you.
" Sorry, I know you wanted these since the deadlines today" you said as you looked down at the documents in your hand stood between the door frame.
" Twenty minutes " Tommy replied taking out his watch as your shoulders dropped, his cold manner never ceasing to crush the small amounts of courage you could muster up nowadays. Rolling her eyes Polly walked over to you, pulling you in as she shut the door.
" Come on love, come in" she said with a smile as she took the file from you looking through it briefly when her eyes snapped up to Tommy. Clearing his throat Tommy fidgeted in his chair his eyes darting to his Aunt then back to the cigarette between his fingers.
" Pass me the diary Y/N" Tommy said shifting away from the formidable stare his Aunt was sending him. Was he seconds away from feeling the back of her hand like he did on a daily occurrence when he was a child? He thought to himself as her eyes pierced into him. Nodding you walked over to the shelves behind him as the fabric of your dress brushed against his leg, your perfume filled with notes of vanilla and jasmine quickly engulfing his senses, transporting him back to happier times. Leaning over you placed the large book in front of him as your hair slowly cascaded down to his face, swaying gently across his cheek, sending a shiver of goosebumps throughout his body. A sudden surge of emotions rushed towards him, catching him off guard as he briefly lost himself in the memories your presence conjured up.
" You can go" he said coldly, recomposing himself as he stubbed his cigarette out into the ash tray on his desk, his whole body stiffening at the intrusion of misplaced hurt now quickly filling his chest.
Turning around you walked to the door stopping momentarily as Polly curiously raised her brow, watching you as if she was anticipating a response. But no response came. Arthur was right, where was the girl you once was? That girl would have launched something at him, that or given him a kick in the balls. Instead you quietly closed the door behind you as you walked to your desk, deflated by his constant hostility towards you.
" You little shit!" Polly said throwing the documents she had been clutching tightly in her hand at Tommy the moment you shut the door. " These don't need filling out for another week. You had her stay all night!" she said placing both her hands on the table looming over her nephew" You can add scorned to your new founded personality Tommy" she hissed as she shook her head at him. "Not only do you remind her everyday of how wronged you feel, you won't let her move on. Keeping her here all hours, making her come in on the weekends, stopping all attempts of her ever being able to move on. You were so young, all you had to do was wait. But no, your stubbornness prevented that. And she waited for you Tommy oh did she wait, feeling guilty everyday for being mature on the matter, guilt forced upon her by you" she finished catching her breath, fed up with the way he had been acting. Standing up Tommy walked over to the window lighting a cigarette as he cleared his throat, the scolding he had just got from his Aunt unexpectedly unnerving him.
" You can go too" Tommy said dismissively as he looked out the window watching the busy streets below him while rubbing his brow with his thumb, feeling just as deflated as you.
" You're your own worse enemy" she said as she turned to face the door. "Oh and Tommy" she added as she looked over her shoulder at him. "That new barmaid you're seeing, I wouldn't count on her to piss on me if I was on fire" she said folding her arms as she left the office, leaving Tommy to wallow in his own self-pity.
Kicking the chair In front of him Tommy leaned back against the wall turning his head to look at you sitting at the desk just outside his office. Ten years ago today, did you think he'd forget. The promises he made the hopes and dreams you shared for the future. Polly's words had unsettled him, not because she was forcing him to remember but because it made him face the uncomfortable truth of how unfair he had been with you. You were too young, it was bad timing. That's what everyone said when Tommy asked you to marry him five days before leaving for France, a proposal you was sure he made on a complete whim. He had brought the ring, asked the priest, fuck he had even managed to scramble enough money together for a new suit. But you said no. Not because you didn't want to or because you didn't love him, but because his timing was bloody awful. He was days away from leaving to fight in a war that was claiming young men's lives every minute of every hour. Sure it was romantic, young couples were doing the very same thing up and down the country. But you wanted to wait, wanted to celebrate his return with something everyone could look forward to, something to hold onto as the lonely nights without him passed by. The last thing you wanted was to be left a newlywed and a widow, your nuptials stained by the possible outcome of him never returning. But Tommy being the stubborn man he was wouldn't accept your reasoning. He had quickly convinced himself you had been influenced by your family, by your friends, heck the whole of Small Heath for all he knew when you made him wait for your answer until the next day, popping the happy bubble you had both been living in for the past five years. Darting his eyes away from you Tommy clenched his jaw, leaning forward to grab his coat and diary on his desk as he stormed out his office. His bitterness was justified, you didn't love him the way he loved you, he was sure of it.
Five minutes until the end of the day and all you wanted to do was go home and sleep but being the good ol' sport you was you had agreed to go for drinks to celebrate Tommy's birthday.
As you all made your way to the door, Polly stood beside you casually speaking about her plans for the weekend you turned your head to the side to see Tommy stood right behind you, so close you could feel the heat of his breath on the back of your neck. Was this a new way he had chosen to make you feel uncomfortable? If it was it was certainly working you thought as you impatiently waited to leave. God what was taking John so long to open the door?
"It's bloody stuck again. It's this fucking weather it's freezing up the handle" John said as he rattled the doorknob trying to loosen it.
" Come on John give it a good push or are your hands too dainty?" Arthur shouted stood right behind Polly as she grimaced at his bellowing voice. A small traffic jam of people started to accumulate as everyone waited for John to get the door open, your bodies getting pushed closer together. With Tommy's firm statue now firmly pushed up against your back his eyes wandered down to your reddened cheeks, flushed from the contact of feeling him so close to you again. For just as much as your heart was rapidly beating so was Tommy's, the warmth of your body comforting in the only way that could.
" Bloody hell Curly" Uncle Charlie shouted as he stumbled into everyone pushing you all forward once more. Falling into you, Tommy quickly grabbed hold of your waist stopping you from stumbling over. His touch now so unfamiliar, your eyes darted down to his hand still resting on your hip as you watched his thumb instinctively brush over the curve of your body like he had done hundreds of times before. Suddenly realising, Tommy quickly moved his hand away as he cleared his throat.
" You was gonna fall" he said as you turned your head to the side in response to his sharp movements.
" Don't worry Tommy I wouldn't dare to think otherwise. We're done" you said surprised at how confidently the words had left your lips. Although not being completely honest with yourself, you had begun to realise you needed to stop, stop your constant lamenting over the past, stop your persistence in holding onto the faintest of hopes. Looking straight ahead you pushed your shoulder back, in turn pushing his body away from yours as you crossed your arms. You was getting tired of his shit. The remarks, the looks, his constant mood swings, enough was enough. Scoffing Tommy stepped back, giving you the space you clearly wanted as a small wave of self-doubt crept up on him in response. Had you moved on, met someone knew? Or had he taken things too far thinking you'd always be there waiting for him? The thought of either being true made him feel uncomfortably sick.
Now sat in the Garrison snug surrounded by Tommy's family and friends you looked up to see him sat directly in front of you, his arm draped over the back of the chair next to him, a scowl spread across his face. Trying to focus your attention elsewhere you ignored the constant glares he was sending your way, the words you had left him with clearly bothering his thoughts. He was getting impatient he wanted you to give him attention, wanted you to look his way. But every remark he made you would dismiss, unapologetically enjoying the growing confidence in you as you started playing the push and pull he had playing with you for the past year. That was until Grace walked in and sat next to him, snuggling into his side as Tommy fidgeted in his seat removing his arm from behind the chair as his whole body stiffened and he sat up straight. Feeling a sudden wave of nerves wash over you at the sight of them together your eyes quickly darted around the room when Arthur caught your line of sight sending you a wink and a smile, the self-doubt that was bubbling in your stomach quickly simmering down at the sight of his reassurance.
" Right a toast!" John said standing up as Arthur jumped up pushing him down by the shoulder.
" I'm the oldest, I do the toasting" he said lifting his glass as a sense of superiority rose within him. He may not be the boss but he was still the big brother and there were some things only big brothers did.
" Yeh whatever, just don't ramble on" John said as he rolled his eyes taking a sip of whisky.
" This time ten years ago on the eve of Tom's birthday..."
" Jesus Christ..." Polly mumbled under her breath as Arthur started his speech.
" I had just scored the biggest loot of of my life and Tommy the biggest win of his. A night never to be forgotten. To whisky, sprouts and cramped storage rooms. Happy Birthday baby brother!" Arthur finished, downing his drink then slamming it on the table as everyone looked at eachother mumbling happy birthdays whilst they raised their glasses in complete confusion at the meaning behind Arthur's toast. Looking up through hooded eyes Tommy caught your eye as you both sent eachother smile, the memories of that night flooding back to you both. Watching the moment between you Grace gripped harder onto Tommy's arm, uncomfortable with the way he was looking at you, the way she often caught him looking at you.
" What in the bloody hell was that toast?" John said as he looked up to Arthur, his whole face scrunched up, completely bewildered by his older brothers speech.
"Those that needed to hear it, heard it" Arthur said trying to sound poetic.
" Sit down Arthur" Polly said shaking her head as she poured herself a third glass of whisky.
" Anyway..." Grace said raising her brow turning to Tommy as she pulled out a small box from her bag. " Happy Birthday" she said kissing his cheek as she handed the gift to him. Putting his drink down Tommy cleared his throat as he sent her a faint smile, opening the present she had offered him. Looking down into the box Tommy's eyes quickly darted up to your face as he pinched his bottom lip. Furrowing your brow at his sudden change in expression, you quickly understood as to why he reacted the way he did when he pulled out a brand-new gold pocket watch from within the small box.
" Tom's already got a pocket watch, he's had it for ten years" Uncle Charlie was the first to say as he leant against the wall whilst the rest of the room suddenly went quiet.
" Exactly, ten years. I got him a new one, a nicer one" Grace said as you felt your heart suddenly drop into your stomach. " You not going to put it on?" She asked turning to Tommy as he nodded reaching into his waistcoat unclasping the watch you had scrimped and saved for a decade ago. Brushing his thumb over the front of it, you and everyone else watched as Tommy placed it on the table, glancing up to you and the tears now welling in your eyes.
" Thanks love" Tommy said attaching his new watch to the chain on his waistcoat, giving her a small peck to the lips as she smiled into the kiss.
" What are you doing?" She said as she watched Tommy turn the dials on his new watch back an extra five minutes, a habit ten years in the making first started by you. " It's five minutes too late" she laughed as she took it from him turning it to the correct time as Polly rested her hand on your thigh, giving it a gentle squeeze in reassurance as everyone else's eyes looked back at you knowingly. Picking up his old pocket watch Tommy was about to put it in his suit pocket when Grace quickly took it from him.
" I'll get rid of it, it's not like it's worth anything" she said whilst Tommy brushed his hand down his mouth as a heavy expression washed over his face. For ten years he had carried that watch against his body, ten years he had carried what felt like a piece of you with him. Its sentimental value was unmatched and Tommy did not want to be parted from it.
" I'll melt it down get some money from it" Arthur said reaching over the table grabbing it from her.
" You won't get much" she laughed as she looked around the room at everyone and the unamused expressions on their face, making it clear they did not share the same opinion. " It's scrap metal" she said as she shrugged her shoulders sipping on her whisky. Turning to Polly a tear fell down your cheek as you quickly collected you coat and bag into your lap.
" I need to leave" you said quietly as she nodded her head sympathetically, pressing a kiss to your cheek. Standing up you pulled your chair back when Tommy abruptly stood up at the same time taking everyone by surprise. Your eyes now locked onto eachother you momentarily stared at one another whilst he watched the cascade of tears fall down your cheeks.
" You bastard" you mouthed as Tommy swallowed harshly watching you storm out the room.
" Y/N wait up love, I'll walk you home" Arthur said climbing over the table not bothering to walk past everyone as glasses and bottles scattered all over the room. " Oops, sorry Grace" Arthur sniggered, clumsily treading on the end of her shoe as she yelped in pain.
" Arthur..." Tommy said as he watched his brother walk out the snug putting his old pocket watch in his coat, feeling like a part of his already broken heart had left.
" Y/N!" Arthur said running up to you. " Bloody hell when did you get so fast?" he joked as he spun you around.
" I can't... I can't do this any more" you said sobbing as you fell into his chest holding on tightly to the front of his coat as he wrapped his arms around you.
" Go on love let it out, have a good cry" he said sighing as he looked back to the Garrison. "You know it's my brotherly duty to give him a good punch in the balls now and then, he's long due one" he informed you as a small laugh escaped your sobbing cries.
" When you do, make sure you don't hold back" you said pulling away as he held onto your shoulders.
" You look like a snotty kid again" be said handing you a rag from his pocket which you furrowed your brow at.
" God knows where that's been" you sniffed throwing it on the ground beside you.
" Charming " he laughed as he pulled out Tommy's pocket watch. "Ere, this belongs to you" he said as he placed it in your hand.
" Melt it down Arthur, he doesn't want it. He has something new and shiny" you said bitterly, no longer reffering to watch but rather the barmaid constantly clinging onto him.
" Nah, don't believe it. He'll want it back, all of it." he said closing your fingers around it as you looked over his shoulder to see Tommy standing outside the Garrison watching you.
" Bye Arthur" you said as he turned to see his brother looking at you both, exhaling a cloud of smoke out into the bitter January air " Go, he's your brother, it's his birthday go celebrate with him" you said as you gave him a hug before you turned and headed for home.
"My watch?" Tommy asked as Arthur approached him, stopping to face his younger brother in the door way.
" You're breaking her heart you stubborn prick" Arthur said as he pushed past him ignoring his question as Tommy squinted into the distance, a frustrated sigh leaving his lips as he watched you turn the corner.
" She broke my heart first" Tommy muttered quietly under his breath as he threw his cigarette into the dirt heading back into the warmth of the Garrison.
Turning the corner onto the back alley of your bedsit you headed for home wiping your tears with the sleeve of your coat when you looked up to see two men blocking your way.
" Alright sweetheart?" One of them said as he turned to face you opening his coat to show you the gun he had sitting in his holster.
" I don't want any trouble let me pass" you said trying to move around him when he grabbed you, slamming you up against the brick wall.
" Tommy's girl right? He said, now holding tightly onto your arm as he looked to his friend for confirmation.
" No you've got the wrong girl" you said looking between them, shuffling in place as you tried to loosen yourself out of his grip.
" No, it's you alright. Said he had a girl waiting for him back in this shit hole of a town and that the barmaids Kimber's for the taking when he asked if he could dance with her at the races. Good thing he didn't bring you, 'cause I reckon Kimber would have rather had a dance with you instead" he said as he glared down at your body, brushing his tongue across his bottom lip. " Y/N right? Tommy's childhood sweetheart. No point in denying it love, everyone as far Kings Norton to Old Oscott have told us so" he said as you furrowed your brow in confusion. You hadn't been Tommy's girl since the war.
" I'm not his girl" you said stomping on his foot as you pushed past him.
" Jesus fucking christ! She's broken my toe, she bloody broke my toe! " he said as stumbled back onto the ground.
" It's definitely you, feisty little thing aren't you?" the other man said as he approached you leaving his friend to attend to himself. " We've heard whispers your boyfriend might be up to something. Tell him we're keeping our eye on him and if he doesn't play by the rules the boss will put a bullet through his head, but not before your gypsy lover watches you do the rounds with every single one of Kimber's men" he said as he opened his pocket knife in one swift movement, pointing it inches away from your throat. "Understood?" he said as you slowly nodded your head your eyes focused down at the blade now pressing against your skin and the burn of it slowly cutting into your flesh.
"Good" he said putting his knife back into his pocket as he turned to his friend leaning against the wall opposite you.
"She broke my fucking toe I'm sure of it"
" Would you quit your whining" his friend answered as he put his arm around his shoulder and they both turned the corner back onto the main street.
Leaning up against the cold brick wall you opened your coat as your chest heaved up and down your whole body trembling in fear. Turning your head you saw Isaiah one of Tommy's men at the end of the alley way watching you, his brow scrunched up in confusion at seeing Kimber's men leaving the same area where you was currently standing. Tipping the end of his cap to you, he glanced back at you a second time as he scratched the back of his head quickly walking off in the direction of the Garrison. Pulling your coat back around your body you stumbled along the cobbled path, your hand out against the brick wall beside you, keeping you up from your legs buckling beneath you as fear and adrenaline continued to course through your body. Fumbling in your bag you pulled out your keys as you watched your desperate attempts to open your front door, your shaking hands preventing you from even holding the key straight. Giving up you slid down the door collapsing onto the floor as a stream of tears fell down your cheeks, your mind replaying what had just happened. You knew of Tommy's dealing with Kimber, dealings you oversaw when Tommy got his own betting licence. That was supposed to be the end of it, but after what just happened you quickly realised Tommy had another plan, one that was not only putting his own life in danger again but yours too. Is that why he mentioned you to Kimber's men, not wanting to get his new fling in harm's way, his bitterness and hate towards you so strong he diverted their attention to you, diverted everyone's attention to you? Y/N Y/L/N Tommy Shelby's childhood sweetheart. Apparently he had the whole of Birmingham still thinking it, now a pawn in his never ending game for more power, more success. As you battled with all the questions running through your head you ended up at the same conclusion that not only did Tommy hate you he had let harm to come to you by putting you in the firing lane. Or had he? It had been a year since the command went out on the streets of Birmingham an order intended for your own protection decided long before any dealings with Kimber, a command that clearly hadn't gone unforgotten. You was not to be bothered not to be approached. No one was to lay a hand on you by order of the Peaky Blinders by order of Thomas Shelby, because you was still his girl, always.
NEXT PART
Tag list: @cosniffee @jonsncws @powellssaturn @jessimay89 @bruher @riseandreigns4u @mariaelizabeth21-blog1 @chimchimjiminie16 @gaslysainz @calicoootalks (unable to tag) @weaponizedvirtue @vlryexsworld (unable to tag) @shittyprofilebutfuckit @mariaelizabeth21-blog1 @peakyswritings
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kayhi808 · 28 days ago
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I know you done a lot with the idea of the dance for first crush and if you want to ignore that’s totally fine, I completely understand, but I love the idea when Bucky brings Abby back, Abby is frustrated with why all the women trying to flirt with him like she doesn’t understand the concept of the flirting and why they wouldn’t take no for an answer and pouting while she tells you all about it while getting her ready for bed or during a dinner/snack
( I am loving this series rn I’m always excited to see that you’ve added more to it ❤️❤️)
Hahaha You want to see Abby go on a rant? Your wish is granted. Lol. She's a possessive little thing!
There's a knock at the door and a loud, "Mama! We home!"
Checking the time, that's odd, they should still be a the dance. You open the door, to find your annoyed looking daughter and a sheepish looking Bucky. Abby stomps into the apartment, Bucky gives you a kiss and a quiet laugh.
You turn to Abby who's leaning against the couch. "Hey, is that how you greet your Mama?"
Abby breaks into a smile and skips over to you. You scoop her up and she kisses your cheek. "I sowwy, Mama!"
You sit on the couch with her in your lap and unbuckle her shoes. "You want to tell me why you're in such a mood?" Bucky brings her, her water flask and sits by you both. "You're back early, did you have fun?"
"A widdle bit." Bucky shakes his head.
"Did Chloe and Mia show up?"
"Oh yes!" Breaking into a big smile, "They came with their Daddies and they so nice and funny! We like them, yeah Bucky?"
"Yea, they were great."
"Oh ok, that's good. What happened to make the dance only a little bit fun?"
Abby gets out of your lap & stands on the couch with her arms folded across her chest. "I don't wike Megan's mommy." She gives you a scowl.
"Did she do something to you?" You look at Bucky over Abby's shoulder & he silently shakes his head, no.
"I brings Bucky," pointing to him, "He's mines date, right?!"
Nodding in agreement, already knowing where this is headed and trying to keep the smile to yourself. "Right, he's your date."
"Ok! Den why she...she touch him?" Her shoulders are hiked up to under her ears and palms up. "Hmmm? Why?" Waving her hand at Bucky, "Hims is mine!"
You squint at Bucky, "She touched him, huh?"
"She didn't...."
"Yes, she did, Mama!" Abby moves over to Bucky, and touches his arm, "She touch his arm, like dis." Then Abby leans into Bucky & gets in his face, & tries batting her lashes at him. "And she make like dis." Abby turns to her mom with a look of disgust.
Bucky cracks up laughing, "Abigail!"
"She did that to him??"
"Yes! Ands you knows what else, Mama?" Abby returns to your lap & takes a sip of water after her rant.
"No, tell me more, baby." You cock an eyebrow at Bucky & he laughs some more.
"She's old and she can'ts READ!" Pointing to Bucky's sticker. "It says James and she call him Bucky!" Abigail is outraged. "She not his fwends. Only fwends can."
"Wow!"
"And you know what, Mama?"
You cover your mouth trying to hide your amusement, because this is very serious business. "No, Abby, what?"
"Bucky dance wit ME and she tries to takes him! She says I need to share." Shaking her head, "I don't hafta shares wit her. I told her I don't want to. She not my Mama, she can't tells me to do that."
"Absolutely!
"And den she want to dance wit him next and I say no cos we going to home to you and she can't come. We cannot be's fwends wit her!" She leans back against your chest & drinks her water.
"Oh my goodness, you had your work cut out for you today, protecting Bucky. You did such a good job, I think you deserve pizza tonight." You kiss the top of her head.
"Yay!! Tank you, Mama!"
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weirdly-specific-but-ok · 8 months ago
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Hi maggots, it's Asmi!
It seems we have arrived at That Point again, when I need a new intro post. So here we are! The Official (kidnapped) Good Omens Mascot and uh Maggot Prince has returned with a fresh post.
First, before I talk about myself, here are some important links that people ask me for and I want to make sure they're accessible:
The Official Maggots Server of Doom on Discord: The server of kindness and chaos and brainrot where we just vibe (I promise you'll be welcome there, whoever you are, maggot, so many people who were shy are now screeching at me and I love that). Link here.
Weirdly-Specific-But-Ok The Youtube Channel: Yes, thanks to the 10khaos post, I made a Youtube channel. I intend to cause a lot of chaos on it, I have already begun. Hehe. Link here.
My Ko-fi: Ummmm this exists? Wahoo a Ko-fi. No pressure and I appreciate you all whether you're a silent lurker, causing chaos, supporting me with words or supporting me on Ko-fi. I love you. Link here.
My PO address and email: I'D LOVE TO HEAR FROM YOU, SNAIL MAIL OR MAIL OR OTHERWISE! Link here.
The Good Omens Ad: A lot of you ask me what Good Omens is about. Never fear! I wrote an advertisement for it ages ago, and @1800ineedshelp edited it fabulously. Link here.
Okay I think that's the important parts, I'll edit it later, and now... uh HELLO!
I'm Asmi, I'm 20 years old, he/him, very queer and probably napping at any given moment of the day. Because of a chaotic post, I now have a fandom. My fans, such as they are, are known as maggots. There is a lot of significance behind that (accidentally, I just picked it because it looked like mascot kind of).
I am the Official Good Omens Mascot, because I was kidnapped by the fandom in January after I made a summary post of Good Omens without watching it, just by what I saw on my tumblr dash. I have grown very fond of this title and the fandom, and have since watched the show (some episodes twice).
Also, this blog is a safe space for all queer people, and yes that includes aroace-spec people, trans people, all queer people. If you don't agree with that, there's the door *points to a pit of boiling sulphur*.
ANYWAY YES ENOUGH TALKING WELCOME TO THE CHAOS JUST BE KIND AND RESPECTFUL OF EACH OTHER, BE AS IRREVERENT TO ME AS POSSIBLE, AND WE'LL GET ALONG GREAT. YOU DON'T NEED TO INTERACT TO BE PART OF THIS FAMILY, EVERYONE IS WELCOME! WAHOO!
[if you see talk of spare organs, the Wibbles Incident, Fae kidnapping, Red Bull-induced madness, me thirsting over Crowley etc, don't worry about it, it's normal here. just be careful when gardening and/or fishing is mentioned, it's a trap.]
I LOVE YOU!
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angel-eyes05 · 1 year ago
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a spider in the snow
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pairing: fem!reader x miguel o’hara
summary: you help rehabilitate an injured miguel after he returns from one of his late night patrols…in more ways than one
warnings: nsfw, fluff then smut then fluff, handjob (both m and f recieving), blood mention, an incy wincy tincy bit of angst
word count: 2.5k
notes: heyyyyy i've come back from the dead. i don't really write a lot of one shots so go easy on me for this one. just like every horny person on the internet, i’ve fallen head over heels in love with miguel o’hara. this is me giving into my impulses lmao. sorry if i do anything thats out of character idk him that well so just work with me here. i also don't know everything about nueva york and if names are different than here or something so im just gonna pretend they’re the same. if they are, great! if not, just go with it lmao. one more thing, despite being cuban i am a no sabo kid (rip me) so i had to use a translator for some of this so apologies in advance if some things aren't super accurate. ok lets get on with the show.
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Snowy nights in Nueva York have always been one of your favorite parts about moving up north. Seeing all the lit up buildings illuminated in the snow, all the people ice skating in Rockefeller Center rink just below your apartment window, the reminders of Christmas coming soon. It kept your heart warm against the freezing temperatures outside. You also loved the feeling of being able to bundle yourself up in blankets and hoodies, a mix of yours and your boyfriend’s, having an excuse to make hot chocolate, and finally being able to use the fireplace that normally laid dormant in the middle of your living room. The one con about the snow was when it would land on Miguel’s patrol nights. Your already nervous mind was only heightened by the added uncertainty of everything that could happen while he was out there. What if he got too cold while out there and it affected his ability to fight? What if it started snowing too hard and he wouldn’t be able to find his way back to the apartment? You knew some of your concerns were probably dumb, but they felt serious to you. 
This was one of those nights. One of the nights where you would sit on your couch, next to the cracked window, unable to sleep until you could see him come back safe. You flipped through the channels of the tv aimlessly, trying to find something to keep your mind off of the growing cold outside. You eventually turn it off after coming across the weather channel, claiming a snowstorm would be rolling into the city in about 15 minutes. Deciding there was nothing you could do about your situation, you walked over to your bedroom and wrapped yourself in your massive duvet to shield from the cold. Worries dashed around your mind about everything that could happen. Despite being verbally supportive about Miguel and his…hobbies, you really hated the idea of him sneaking out in basically pajamas almost every night to “beat up the bad guys” essentially. Even though he had explained everything to you by this point, having been dating for about three years now, you still couldn’t quite understand everything. Radioactive spiders? Corrupt businesses? Fangs and claws? Mutations? A multiverse? It was a lot to wrap your head around. But, despite all of this, all of your worries and concerns over Miguel, you stayed. Because you knew you didn’t start dating him because of his whole superhero business or whatever. You were dating him because you loved him. The real him. The way he would always press gentle kisses into the crook of your neck. How on his days off, you would be woken up to the smell of eggs and bacon cooking in the kitchen just for you. How he would always whisper sweet praises to you while you would give him head. How easily he could be crumbled down beneath his rock hard exterior. The Miguel underneath the red and blue spandex. You dreamt of this as you slowly fell into a calm slumber. You fell asleep bundled up in all the blankets on your bed, arm outstretched to the opposite side the bed, almost as if you were reaching for something that wasn’t there. 
After some time had passed, you’re not sure exactly how much, you were awoken by a thud coming from your bathroom. You lazily rubbed your eyes and grabbed your alarm clock to check the time. 3:47 am. Yeah, that’s definitely Miguel in there. You dragged yourself out of bed to help him out, throwing one of this hoodies over your tank top for extra warmth. You also liked how it still smelled like him after three times in the wash. You opened the door, eyes squinting from the bright fluorescent light. And there he was. You found it endearing. How Miguel was trying, and failing, to reach this massive scratch on his back to clean it instead of just waking you up to ask for your help. You look to the floor to find a bottle of hydrogen peroxide sitting there on the rug, probably what caused the thudding sound. You stood there leaning in the doorframe, waiting for him to notice you, even though he probably already heard every step you’ve taken from the bed up to the door now. “You need any help there?” you ask him, jokingly. You had seen him in much worse conditions, so you took moments like these to be more comedic, an attempt to lighten his mood sort of. It didn’t usually work. “No, I got it. Please go back to sleep,” he said, still attempting to wrap his arms around himself. You rolled your eyes and walked over to sit behind him, picking up the hydrogen peroxide off the floor and grabbing a couple of cotton balls from the first aid basket. “Mi amor, please go back to sleep, I promise I can do this by myself,” he argued. Before he could get another word in, you poured some of the hydrogen peroxide over his wound. He groaned in response and squeezed your thigh to help level out the pain. “That’s for worrying me all night,” you said to him, just over the volume of a whisper. As you began to dab the blood off of his cut, he responded. “You know I don’t want you to worry.” Once you could see he was turning his head around to look at you, you turned your eyes away. You didn’t really want to look at him right now. It’s not that you were mad at him. Ok that’s a lie, you were a little mad. But it was more of a helplessness you felt when you would see him like this. Beat up, cut, scratched, bruised. And there wasn’t anything you could do to help. Not until after at least. And it wasn’t like you were a trained nurse or anything. You dreaded the day that he would come stumbling through the window, too injured for you to take care of yourself. Or worse. The day he wouldn’t come home at all. “Yeah, well that doesn’t mean I don’t,” you said sort of coldly. You stood up from your position, waiting to patch up his back until after he showered. You changed your positions to sit from behind him to in front, ready to take care of his front side now. “I don’t want to talk about that right now tho-.” You cut yourself off when you finally saw his face
Cuts were scattered across his face, one above his eyebrow still dripping blood catching your attention first. He also had a bruise quickly forming on his left cheekbone. Once you moved your eyes more, you saw his nose marked with a deep cut going through the middle. His beautiful nose. It was one of your favorite parts of his appearance. Done scanning his face, your eyes moved down to his chest and his torso. His chest was marked with similar cuts to the one on his back. You kept your eyes on his chest in an attempt to hide the fact you were holding back tears right now. “I’m sorry mi cariño. I really am.” You knew he was. But sorry wasn’t going to keep him safe. This was one apology among many. It didn’t really matter. He wasn’t sorry for getting hurt again and again and again. He was sorry for the fact you had to see him like this. If you wouldn’t have seen that he was injured, he wouldn’t have said anything And you knew after this apology as well, he would go out tomorrow night and do the same thing over again. You didn’t respond to his words. All you could manage to do was pull him into an embrace and apologize when he winced from your hands hitting his cuts. You sat there for a bit, running your hands through his hair and trying to hold yourself back from crying. He nuzzled his head into the crook of your neck and planted gentle kisses there, each a little apology from him. Once you finally pulled away and wiped your face, you started to clean the scrapes on his face, this time more gentle than his back. You dabbed the cotton ball on his forehead as he held you straddled on his lap. He admired your features as you concentrated on him, rubbing your back with his fingers in the process. You didn’t say much, only a simple “sorry” if you were a little too rough with cleaning. Despite the stern face you were putting on, Miguel knew you secretly liked the way he would grab at your thighs and hips with his claws when you did something that hurt.
Once you were finished, you silently put the first aid equipment away and left the bathroom so he could take a shower. He planted a soft kiss into your forehead before you left the room. Once you crawled back into bed, you sighed to yourself. How did you end up here anyways? There’s no way you were expecting all of this when you first saw Miguel at the concert bar that day. Some days were amazing with him. Others were much harder. And while you’ve definitely had worse days with him, today was leaning on the latter option. You contemplated all of this until you heard the door to the bathroom behind you open, Miguel stepping out of the steaming room with his towel wrapped around his lower body. You were very quickly reminded of one of the reasons you’ve stayed with him for so long. The way his wet curls were laying around his head. How his chest glistened while it was damp, despite currently being tattered with cuts at the current moment. He sleepily shuffled over to the bed, dropping his towel before crawling up close to you in bed. The warmth of Miguel’s freshly showered body against yours helped to melt the majority of your worries away. It also helped that you could feel his his cock getting harder against your leg while he cuddled against you. You finally turned around to face him, cupping his jaw in your hand and rubbing your thumb across his face. He grasped your hand and pressed soft kisses into it. “I love you so much Miggy,” you finally said, breaking the silence and drawing his eyes towards you. “I really do, and I’m sorry if I ever make it seem like I don’t. You just…you scare me sometimes.” You quickly realize those weren’t the words you meant. You begin to stutter and take back your words a bit, until you see that Miguel has given you his full attention. You take a deep breath and continue. “You don’t scare me. It’s more of what you do that scares me. I never know when you’re gonna come back or if you even are. If you think I take joy in taking care of you after you come back, I really don’t. I hate seeing my boy like this. And it makes me scared that one day you’re gonna come back in a shape I can’t fix. It scares me so bad Miggy you don’t even know,” you say, choking back your tears. Once Miguel notices you’re about to start crying, he wraps his arms around you immediately. “Shhh it’s ok preciosa,” he comforts as you quietly cry into his broad shoulders. “I’m so sorry for making you worry,” he says in between kissing the top of your head. “I promise I’ll make it up to you, and I love you too.” 
You pull away from his hug and stare into his beautiful crimson eyes as he wipes away your tears. You suddenly fall into the overwhelming urge to kiss him. He returns the kiss with even more passion than you put into it. You quickly found yourself exploring his body with your hands, moans escaping his lips whenever you would graze over one of his wounds. You drew yourself closer to him to absorb more of his body heat, though you were quickly reminded of his bare cock as you could feel it hardening on your leg. Your hands eventually made it down there, teasing Miguel along the way as you felt him up on the way down. You then took his hard, already wet cock into your hands, caressing every ridge you could find on it. You could hear more moans exit his mouth and slide into yours as you handled him like putty. He would let out messier sounds, even a growl at one point, and jerk forward into your hand when you would tease around his tip. “F-fuck baby. Y-you’re s-so good to me. ‘N pr-retty too,” he would blurb out Feeling his cock get increasingly hard in your hand began to make you slightly wet as well. This only increased as Miguel began to take off your underwear as well, sliding two of his fingers into your pussy and placing his thumb to draw circles onto your clit. Your grip on his length becomes lazy and sloppy as you’re stimulated as well. You’re surprised at how quickly Miguel is able to find your clit, but then again you expect him to know your body so well after three years. After both of you have been at it for a while, you’re the first one to get close to your orgasm. “Fuck M-Miggy, I-I’m gonna cum,” you manage to moan out. His kisses on you get sloppy as he reaches his as well. It’s over for you once he begins to put more pressure onto your core. You let out an inhuman noise as your stomach fills with the white heat of your orgasm, shaking your entire body. Miguel takes his fingers out of your entrance and licks your cum off of his fingers. It’s then over for him when you eventually put the pressure of your fingers onto his cock. You hand is then covered in his cum once he reaches his climax in your fist, moaning intensely into the air. While he’s in the middle of his orgasm, his claws pop out of his fingers and into your hips and underneath your thigh where his hands are placed. Then, he lets out his fangs and uses them to leave hickeys into your neck, making sure not to let out any of his poison while doing so. “Just stay here with me Miggy,” you sigh out, his fangs deep into your neck. “You don’t ever need to go back out there again. Just stay here with me forever.” He simply nods at first, still sucking into your neck. Once he lets go and and begins to calm down, he responds with “Forever and always mi corazón,” whispering the words into your ear as he lays more kisses along your collarbone and neck.
You stare outside the window at the falling snow, hoping this time he’ll keep his word, but knowing deep down that he wasn’t going to. But for now, you could just appreciate your time with him now. He was all yours right now. Everything. And that was enough.
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A/N: uhhhh sorry but i didn't feel like proofreading this cause its super late for me rn sorry not sorry lmao
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briefalpacashark · 7 months ago
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~Hangover~
Synopsis: Titles pretty self explanatory.
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The next morning you were happily cooking away, watching the minutes pass by on the clock. Usually the boys would have been up half an hour ago. You would have to wake them up soon, though. You all had a mission briefing soon. Now you are a good person. But last night they did have you running across town and dealing with police because of their antics. So you set up a speaker in the hall, turned it on full blast and played an obnoxiously loud ‘Can Can Dance’ song. Hearing the cacophony of groans, you smile, returning to the kitchen. You watched as Gaz, Jonny and Price all dragged themselves into the wreck room heads bowed and pinched nose bridges.
“Well good morning sunshine’s and daisies!” you made sure to hit your voice with a slightly higher and louder pitch, making most of them flinch and groan.
“Shhhhhh,” Price hushed in your general direction. Hearing the speaker suddenly die out, you peeked around the corner to see Ghost standing there with his eyes barely open and a now impaled speaker on the end of his knife.
“Good morning,” you smirked. He looked at your smile, giving a grunt before walking to the table, throwing his defeated opponent upon the table, the bang making them all wince.
“Well well well. What happened to you guys' last night?” you asked, placing two large plates on the table. Full of food they might or might not want to eat. 
“We, uh, we had a few drinks,” Price said.
“Of, a few?” you asked, piling up your plate and beginning to eat.
“Yeah, I think,” he murmured, grabbing a plate for himself.
“How's your chest Jonny?” you asked. Jonny looked up at you with an accusing look, wondering just how you knew about the bald patch on his chest.
“Don't know what you mean, doc,” he grumbled.
“Aha sure. How's the head Simon?” you asked.
“Fine,” he muttered. Everyone looked at his head and to the slight bulge on his temple that the mask failed to hide.
“Got to say didn't pin you as a booty shorts type of man Gaz,” you added turning to Gaz. His face paled as he recalled the pink bedazzled pants he had quickly thrown into the bin. Your smirk widened impossibly wider. You were having way too much fun.
“And sir,” everyone went silent as you turned to Price. He looked up at you with a slight warning.
“I'm sorry about the hat,” you said. Everyone was silent for a few moments as they took in your smug grin.
"I'm to fucken old for this shit," he grumbled reaching for his tea.
“Alright you know what happened last night don't you?” Jonny asked.
“Who me? How could I know? I wasn't there remember,” you said. They pondered. That's the thing. They couldn't remember a damn single thing other than starting a drinking competition with the airforce boys.
“Did. I um d anything embarrassing?” Gaz asked bashfully. You pretended to think.
“What do you define as embarrassing?” you asked. He groaned, and Jonny chuckled.
“What are you laughing about Jonny?” you asked, taking a bite of food. His smile fell as he quickly shut up.
“You came to get us?” Price asked. You nodded.
“So, what happened?” Gaz asked.
“You know I don't think you would believe me even if I did tell you,” you hummed.
“Try us,” Ghost said.
“Right, ok,” you cleared your throat pushing your plate away. 
“So I get a call at 2 am in the morning. You rang me from a random phone, at a phone booth, that you didn't use and you have my contacts up on Gaz phone that you also didn't use. You were all just sitting on the curb eating a shit ton of Macca’s. It was an event to get you all in the car. Then when I did get you all in we went to a bar to pay of your tab. A bar that takes away your left shoe to make sure you don't run out on a tab. Which you guys did. Oh, wait sorry. I forgot the part where you all took a dip in a fountain to save ducks from drawing. Well Simon saved the ducks, Jonny tried to help but somehow started to drown in knee high water. Gaz tried to save him but couldn't and then Price apparently saved you both. Anyway so across from this bar is a police station. And you brilliant genius’s tried to pick a fight with a whole police force. Because apparently one of them tried to arrest Gaz. And the only reason why was because Gaz stole a stun gun. Then when I threatened you with lazwell finding out you all legged it down the street. Ghost almost took out a low hanging beam and Jonny and Gaz took out each other. I then had to track you all down again. You all put up a fight thinking I was working with the police. I had to tie you three up and put you in the back. Captain you were in a fucking tree. Honestly don't know how you got up so high. And Simon was in the trunk the whole time. So half way back to base you somehow managed to convince yourselves that you were kidnaped and jumped out of said car. I looked for you again and you called me to inform me you all had been arrested. Lucky for you I'm a sweet talker and got you guys off with a warning. Then I got you back and had to lug all your asses back to your beds,” you finished of the story with a smile. The boys all stared at you, first processing your words and then flat out denying them.
“Bull shit,” Jonny said in denial.
“Well, have a look at this and say that again,” you pulled out your phone and showed them the photo. Their faces fell as they took it in.
“Delete it,” Ghost ordered.
“What? Fuck no. Do you know the shit I had to go through last night? I earned this,” you stated.
“Sargent, I order you to delete that photo,” Price commanded.
“Captain, can i just say you have the cutest sweetest little giggle I've ever heard in my life,” you cooed. Price's face snapped into a glare.
“Giggled?” Jonny smirked.
“Captain's a giggling drunk,” you nodded. 
“Delete it,” Ghost ordered again.
“Make me,” you challenged. A scream left your lips as they all pounced on you, successfully pulling the phone from your grip and deleting the photo. 
“You all assholes,” you grumbled, taking your phone back.
“Not a word about last night to anyone,” Price ordered, pointing at you.
“Yes sir,” You gave a mock salute, grinning ear to ear.
“What's that?” he asked, pointing to the smile.
“What's what sir?” you asked innocently.
“That smile. What have you done?” he asked.
“Nothing sir,” you smiled, batting your eyelashes before walking away. 
Across the base, Laswell had just entered her office, tea in hand. Sitting down at her computer, she opened her emails going through the more important once before finding one from you. Reading the topic of blackmail, she moved closer, taking a sip of her tea.
As she opened it her eyes went wide at the picture she saw spitting the tea out in a mist.
Later that day you found Ghost sitting on the couch rubbing his temple. 
“Here,” you said, holding out some tablets to him with a drink of water.
“What's this?” he asked.
“Does it matter?” you asked with a smirk. He shrugged, hiking his mask up to his nose and taking the tablets. You were slightly taken aback seeing the half of his face. And from the half you could see he was handsome. What you loved more was the stumble he wore. Yep he was definitely blond. 
“Huh,” you hummed.
“What?” he asked, pulling his mask back down.
“Knew you had a stubble. Jonny owes me a tenner,” you smiled. Again, the Dajuvu washed over you. Ghost thought back to the time you were in the hospital. To the time you held his face so tenderly and looked at him so softly. He wished you would do it again. 
“Hey, wanna hear something worth its weight in gold?” you asked, your cheeky grin taking over. He nodded, and you slotted yourself next to him, your arms pressed against each other. You opened up your phone going into your recorder. Shuffling impossibly closer you held the phone up between your ears. 
“What?”
“Shhhhh,” you hushed him, your hand unknowingly dropping to his biceps to pull him closer. He leaned down, his head gently knocking on the top of yours. It was comedic really. His whole upper body was bent over while you were just sitting there. 
Softly a giggle sounded from your phone.
“What the hell is that?” Ghost asked as he continued to listen.
“That is our dear captain giggling,” you chuckled. Simon couldn't help the laugh that burst from his mouth. And not one of his half chuckles. No it was a real laugh. I mean, who wouldn't be amused by it. Your smirk turned into a warm smile as you looked up at him. 
“Fuck, That’s hilarious. That's really Price?” he asked. You loved it, the way his smile reached his eyes.
“Yeah, but not as amusing as you tighty whities,” You grinned, patting his leg and getting up. He froze. Sure, he wore tighty whities when he was in civics. They were comfortable. 
“So you took advantage of me when I was drunk and unconscious?” he asked teasingly.
“Oh yeah definitely,” you grinned back with a wink. You went to leave but paused, stepping back to face him. “I didn't see your face if that's what you mean. I kept my eyes closed when I took your mask off,” you added. 
“I know,” he muttered. You frowned and were about to ask about it when Price called the two of you for the briefing. 
“Come on,” he said, walking up to you and putting you in a headlock. Which wasn't hard. He practically dragged you out.
“Don't go telling anyone about my tighty whities. Copy?” he asked.
“Sure thing, Sir,” you grinned tapping out. He smiled, releasing you. You walked side by side. Something you hoped one day you would always do.
“You owe me a speaker by the way,”
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=COD Master List Here=
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