#if you don't want to educate someone more privileged than you if you're part of a marginalized group and not into doing that

[theghostofashton]

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[brokenorbornthatway]

We lost a couple followers after the last post we reblogged, so I figured now is a good time to go over some of our stances so you can know if we're not your cup of tea.

We are profiction, proship, anti harassment ,and anti censorship. No exceptions.

Fiction is an endless playground with no rules, do literally whatever you want for whatever reason you want.

We are pro kink and anti kink shaming. Honestly this is pretty much the same as being profiction/proship. Kink is fantasy. So long as all parties are able to and do consent, kinks are morally neutral.

We are pro para, and to be precise, pro big 3 having the right to exist without being dehumanized/demonized. To be more precise, we wholeheartedly support non offending/anti contact pedophiles. There is nothing wrong with having an attraction. Thought crimes do not exist. We support paraphiles right to exist and find community, support, and healthy ways to embrace themselves without causing harm to themselves or others.

We do not believe there is ever a circumstance in which it becomes acceptable to strip someone of their human rights. We have had more than our fair share of violent fantasies towards people who have wronged us or those we love and people who have caused large scale harm. Believe me, we get the urge to say "but this type of person deserves to be systemically punished". It's pretty easy to buy into. It's never the right answer though. Allowing any one group or type of person or whatever to be dehumanized, means that anyone can be, which leads right back to the systems of oppression we live in now. No one deserves to be treated as less than human.

We are endo supportive and against fake claiming. We don't think it's right to assume that you know better than people what's going on in their own brains. Even if you did think someone is "faking", you don't know them well enough, nor are you educated enough, nor are you in the position (the position being "being their therapist") to tell them they're faking and risk being wrong and causing someone serious mental distress.

We are anti punitive justice and pro restorative justice. We are a prison abolitionist. Prison is never an acceptable answer for "what to do when harm is done?"

We are in favor of youthlib, and still learning about this topic. Children are people and are often treated as less than that. Children are fully autonomous beings and we are in favor of children's rights. Kids deserve to have a say in their lives and the issues that affect them.

We are against body shaming in all instances, including jokes about penis size and jokes about how people with bad opinions look.

We are pro all good faith identities. We really do not understand radqueer or transID things, but as long as you aren't causing harm, we support you.

We are pro self diagnoses. Diagnoses is a privilege that is unavailable to many and is a thing that is unsafe to some. I don't believe in armchair diagnosing others. Unless you're their doctor, you don't have the qualifications to diagnose them. However, I absolutely believe everyone is the expert on themselves, and with the information on whatever the condition on question is, most people can at least make a pretty good educated guess on what's going on with themselves.

We are against equating normal with good.

We are anti fascist and anti colonization.

We love and support Jewish people.

We believe in second chances. People can learn to do better and everyone deserves that chance. We believe in rehabilitation. To be human is to fuck up. It's a lot easier to admit your fuck ups and learn better when you see other people doing the same and being accepted.

We think violence is a key part of human nature and that it is something that needs to be fully embraced so that there are ample options to act out violent urges without causing harm that are easily accessible without fear of being shamed. There are already tons of options to for this in existence, but the stigma towards openly enjoying and wanting violence is huge barrier. Rather than meeting someone who says they're having violent urges with "count to ten, do deep breaths, GET HELP," we could meet them with "ok, that's totally human and normal. We've got video games, rage rooms, etc, where you can work through those violent urges in a healthy way." I don't know about everyone, but for us, learning that throwing soft things against the wall while rage screaming was an acceptable and safe way to manage anger and the urge to throw shit was a huge relief. Humanity is brutal, so in order to heal and build something better, I think safe ways to express that brutality and openness regarding it are vital.

Nothing really exists in terms of absolutes. This one is one that's hard for us due to being prone to black and white, all or nothing thinking. Everything falls in shades of grey. There is nuance in everything.

This one is basically a repeat, but it's important to us: every human life has intrinsic value that can not be taken away, no matter how "bad" they are or how much wrong they've done. Everyone deserves to be treated like a human, no matter what. If human rights don't apply to everyone, then they aren't human rights, they're "good people rights", and that should scare you.

That's all I can think of right now. Be aware that this is a vent blog. We might vent or rant about any of the above topics at length. If any of these things are not for you, we kindly invite you to leave.

[st-dionysus]

Genuinely don't mean this in a negative sense, I'm actually just curious. Stating this first as I have trouble with written tone and like making my intent clear-

Why do you acknowledge/have conversations with transandrophobic people who reply to your posts? From my understanding it seems to make you quite angry(?) and I don't understand the goal of doing so, especially when the difference between your irl and online community interactions seems to be so stark regarding the levels of bigotry you face (from what you've shared on your blog).

No worries if you don't want to respond for whatever reason either

Hello!

I don't understand what made you come to the conclusion that the levels of bigotry I face in real life are lesser than that of the ones I face online, it is the opposite - in real life I have to face the material consequences of transphobia, transandrophobia, bioessentialism, misogyny, racism, capitalism, and a wide variety of other intersecting issues.

Online I have to face mean words (which are sometimes death/rape threats, triggering content, and pedojacketing or other types of "callout posts" - but ultimately, they are just words).

What I do have Irl, is a healthy support group and community through found family and friends that make the levels of bigotry I face worth facing. Having the privilege of a strong community of trans friends in real life is also what allows for the online harassment to be "just words" - I have a community offline, which not everyone does (Which is why online harrasment can be deadly, I do not want to dismiss the amount of harm online harassment can cause).

I do however, talk more about the support and community I have in my personal life, then I do about how I'm personally facing a lot of discrimination and difficulties on a daily basis, because it's important to share with people that community, intersection, and love is always possible and worth living and fighting for. I'm a firm believer that love and community are among the most important parts of life.

(I do also talk about the material effects of transandrophobia pretty frequently, since it's a pretty important aspect of discussing it.)

As for why I interact with the people who say mean words online, there are a few reasons;

I think they might genuinely be confused or do not have malicious intent. (I am often incorrect.) Sometimes when people don't understand something, they lash out this is even easier to do online when you don't have another human being standing in front of you, but instead have a wall of text. Sometimes, I interact with people to try and explain my point of view and sometimes I'm an asshole when I do that, because it's easy to be an asshole when you're facing a wall of text and not another person. That being said, often I'm just trying to get a point across. I've have a lot of friends who've been assholes to me and then helped me learn and grow.

I am documenting arguments, fallacies, and harrasment directed at trans men. A very common argument against aknowledging transandrophobia and the harm it does is "I don't believe you, I've never seen someone do or say that about a trans man, you're lying for attention". I can direct those people to proof that says otherwise. I can also use this documentation when discussing transandrophobia and the shapes that it can take in activist and academic settings or when discussing with friends and found family or younger trans men who reach out to me online, I can use it to educate how these arguments form and how to cope with them, when they are directed at you. It's a "know your enemy" situation, and in this case it's "Know the arguments that will be used against you and prepare for them cause they won't always be online"

Some of them are really stupid, it's funny to point at them and go "wow, that's really stupid" and it gives other people the chance to go "God, that is really stupid, I am going to block this person before they can be really stupid in my notes or inbox".

I typically block people after one or two interactions if it's clear that they are being malicious on purpose, cause I'm not actually interested in wasting time, I just want to put their ass on blast first. They said something publicly, and I'm sharing what they said with the context they said it to me in, so other people can block them. This means I can avoid perpetuating the flaws in callout posts and block lists that are just a list of urls followed by "trust me bro, these are bad people!!!".

Thank you for the ask and I hope I was able to answer your question.

[vaspider]

Tbh, everyone I see trying to come up with alternative words for Culturally Christian keeps reminding me of when white people got really upset about the term White Privilege. Maybe the term SHOULD make people uncomfortable. Maybe we shouldn't have to take the complaints of others about a term we created to describe our experiences as more important than our needs. As well-meaning as some folks have been, it's been so frustrating to feel like that aspect isn't being seen. We created this term to discuss our oppression and others keep coming to us about their feelings about it, their discomfort. We didn't get rid of the term White Privilege just because it upset a bunch of white people. Why do we have to get rid of the term Culturally Christian because it upsets people it describes?

I'm trying to be compassionate too but it's hard for me to be when it feels like most of the criticisms of the term have been in bad faith and that the criticism is centered around OTHER people's feelings rather than our need to describe our oppression. Idk it doesn't feel fair I guess.

I didn't really expect you of all people to react like this to me having a compassionate conversation with someone who isn't Christian, wasn't raised Christian, and was abused by Christians for not being a Christian, about that person not wanting to be labeled as being inextricably tainted by a religion that abused them for their whole life. That's not something I expected from you. Maybe you missed that part of the conversation, or maybe you read a good faith conversation as if it was in bad faith, idk, but this seems rather unkind for you.

I understand your frustration. I also think it that if I'm actually dedicated to tikkun olam, if someone also being hurt in this situation respectfully talks with me about how I'm hurting them with splash damage from these discussions, I really should hear them out. And if, in the course of that discussion, we talk through how to not only be more accurate with what we're talking about but how to be less hurtful to other victims of Evangelical Christianity, I think that's pretty good, actually.

The person you're talking about isn't Christian and never was, so your analogy doesn't really hold. That person didn't hold any particular privilege and was never part of the dominant group in the first place. Like... that's the whole point. They're also a survivor of religious violence. You assigning privilege to that person which they never received is part of the problem we were addressing in the first place.

Plus, like, isn't the desired outcome that people who are carrying ideas and mindsets which come from Christian hegemony work on shedding those ideas and mindsets? Labeling people - especially people who aren't Christian and doubly especially those who never were - rather than ideas means those people are labeled regardless of what ideas they hold. That seems counterproductive to me, and, again, hurtful to fellow victims to label them with an identity they don't hold. It's like someone calling a bi person a Spicy Straight because they don't look queer enough or whatever - they're assigning an identity that someone else doesn't have because it makes it easier for them to speak their pain, and ignoring the damage that does.

The best part of the conversation is that by the end of it, someone pointed out that there's already an academic term -- Christian hegemony -- which has been in use for a really long time, well before "cultural Xianity" came into use. It looks like it goes back at least 50 years. So because I was patient and compassionate with someone else who was victimized like I was victimized, I got to learn something which will make it easier to communicate in the future, since that term is widely established and it's easy to point to PDFs that define it, or articles with Jewish educators explaining it.*

Sounds like a win to me - I get to avoid accidentally hurting others who were hurt like I was hurt, I learned something, and now I have a better, clearer term and can speak more clearly.

I'm sorry it frustrates you. I don't think your analogy works, though, and I'm happy with using "Christian hegemony" to describe ideas and not labeling people. I certainly wouldn't like it if someone insisted on calling me Christian, because I'm not, so forcing that label on others who also are not Christian seems hypocritical and unkind. Someone can hold ideas they learned from Christian hegemony without being Christian, and saying it that way doesn't hurt me, so it's no great burden to me to use a more established, more accurate, less hurtful means of addressing my own hurt.

* I don't agree 100% with everything in these links, please don't send me asks or reblog this with nitpicks of the links, I'm not interested bc that's not the point of including them.

[nerdygaymormon]

I’m worried that me being a closeted trans guy will invalidate my patriarchal blessing… like with cis guys it’ll tell them about their wife and mission. But that’s not gonna happen for me, it’s gonna talk about this other person’s future, this other person’s husband and kids. I know that i can pass as a guy, i know the blessing is done privately and is allowed to be kept private. But im doubtful that my parents or bishop won’t spoil it. That the patriarch will find out. do you think there is hope for me?

I understand your concern.

From what you wrote, I think you're worried that if people find out you're trans then you won't be able to get the patriarchal blessing.

I have not seen anything that says a trans person cannot receive a patriarchal blessing, but I understand the worry because the interview questions for this blessing are similar to the questions to get a temple recommend.

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I have a few thoughts about patriarchal blessings. I've spoken with a few patriarchs and they have said they get an impression and then they put that into words. So for instance, he feels like he want to bless this person that they have the potential of getting married, and then he says something like, "I bless you that you'll take a young daughter of Zion to the temple."

For me, I think of it as he put his own spin on the idea because God knows I'm queer and wouldn't have made that specific promise to me.

Another thing, the promises in the blessing are 'potential' and not 'prophetic.' It's a guide, not a map. By which I mean, these are possibilities, not guarantees. Most patriarchal blessings include a path that says to go on a mission, get an education, get married and have children, serve in callings, and that fits the path that many lives take. I think the more interesting parts of a patriarchal blessing are those that aren't about this stereotypical path but are uniquely included for you.

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The stake presidency I work with have a saying, "information leads to inspiration," meaning if they're aware of someone's circumstances, those can be taken into consideration as they pray about callings.

I'm not sure if you'd be comfortable with this, but you could ask to speak with the patriarch privately before he gives the blessing. At that point you could say you're queer and you worry that if he didn't know that then he might use gendered language in a way that wouldn't work for you.

By saying "queer," you leave it vague and he can interpret that to mean 'gay' if he chooses. While unfair, being gay gives somebody more privilege and access than being trans.

There is no requirement to reveal this part of yourself to him. God knows you are trans, and that's enough if that's enough for you.

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Your question shows there are situations which queer people have to deal with at church that non-queer people don't even think about as church is designed for them.

I wish you well, and I'll pray for you to feel some peace about this.

[possibilistfanfiction]

"the neoliberal rhetoric of the pronoun (ESPECIALLY in english) as the ultimate form of advocacy" -- it's such a relief to hear your take on ava's thoughts on pronouns bc i've always been frustrated by how limiting they are? how much stress they cause? i know pronouns are important for some folks but also we're so much more than that...

whew like ok i work in dei, mostly for youth (sport, schools, etc) but also doing lgbtq 101 workshops for upper level execs who run big sports orgs, school districts, blah blah, & it's like... people really think that getting someone's pronouns right (or even trying to get someone's pronouns right) is like........ you have done it! u are not transphobic! u understand the nuances of everyone's gender if you use the right pronoun!

& like... i get paid a fair amount of money to lowkey sell out & explain what a pronoun is (lol) but at the same time it is the fucking bane of my existence. i personally hate pronouns. i think they are legitimately so stupid lol. like... to distill the vast nuanced experience of both having a gender identity AND being perceived at all times as a gendered being (which sometimes match & sometimes don't) into a PRONOUN is just baffling to me.

i think cis people (especially those who don't really want to do the work needed to understand what abolition means -- how queerness & especially gender expansive trans identities are a crucial part of the intersection of where that ethic is rooted) just see pronouns as a sort of easy way out. like you're cool with trans people if you can remember someone's they/them pronouns. it's so gross & so deeply tried up in representational politics (diverse oppressors are still oppressors, white supremacy can be present in ethic & politic even without a white person in the room, etc).

& of course like you said pronouns are definitely important to some people (it is always nice to feel seen & respected at the most basic level 🤪) & definitely not at all saying that anyone should like get people's pronouns wrong, obviously, but i just really hate the concept of how my entire experience as a dyke & a person in general has to be reflected to the world at all times in a silly word which is so vastly incomplete. & i genuinely (not anyone's fault!) hate how that can get tied up in my writing, especially my writing about queerness. when ppl rly care abt terms & IDs etc i can understand bc the common messaging is all rooted in neoliberalism & "representation" instead of anti-state resistance, etc, so it's like. okay lol. but i am intentional in the way i write queerness bc of my own ethic & politic, so you know

ANYWAY yes. queerness & transness is so deeply expansive, to make it only about (or mostly about) pronouns is, to me, ethically against what queerness & transness really is, especially if those pronouns are mostly talked about in the context of english. & i would be remiss in saying that using non-normative &/or neopronouns is a privilege rooted in safety. often i don't disclose they/them pronouns bc i just don't want to explain myself, & i deeply do not care, but i'm always protected in a lot of ways by my whiteness (& that i'm educated, able-bodied, cis-passing, employed, etc etc etc). for a lot of people, for a lot of reasons, pronouns aren't safe. being out as trans isn't safe. but that doesn't mean their gender identities are any different or less important or less vital.

so yah ur right sorry this is a rant lmfao & once & for all.... ava is the most anti-state anti-institution character lmao. she genuinely would not give a flying fuck about her own pronouns. god doesn't fit into a pronoun anyway :)

[mesillusionssousecstasy]

Sense8 : Season 1

What a disappointment.

The scenes were too long, for not enough story.

At the end of season 1, we still don't know who are the Whispers and BPO and what they want.

Some parts were also too boring.

Worse, the characters couldn't even speak in their own language. Apparently, in India, Kenya, Korea, Germany every people speak only english. Come on.

It would have been great if Lito, Hernando and Daniela could have been a throuple.

Also, so many sex scenes without any reason. They are in an extreme dangerous situation, but they find the time to fuck. Seriously.

Some quotes:

"- Anything I could to keep myself separate from the rest of the world." (Episode 1)

"- Music... books... booze. You know, you just look them right in the eye and you lie. It's what we do. It's called acting." (Episode 2)

"- We all know when people are lying to us, we just don't want to listen." (Episode 2)

"- Even now... you don't know how to act like a man." (Episode 4)

"- Visiting is not calling or texting someone. It's not something you make happen. It is something you let happen." (Episode 4)

"- If your enemy will not be humbled, destroy him." (Episode 5)

"- I was suddenly struck by her beauty and the knowledge that... all beauty is temporary." (Episode 5)

"- Decay and death haunt every breath we take." (Episode 5)

"- In Iceland, we have a saying that it's not the drugs that make a drug addict, it's the need to escape reality." (Riley - Episode 6)

"- Hey, you are so lucky. - No, I'm not lucky. - Privileged, not lucky." (Episode 7)

"- You make music, Riley, and for a moment, people forget the troubles in their lives." (Episode 7)

"- You think you're better than the rest of us. - Not better or worse, just different." (Episode 8)

"- Only if one assumes that a master's in economics constitutes a smart mouth, as opposed to educated. - Many educated people are quite stupid, and many stupid people like to start fight for no good reason." (Sun - Episode 8)

"- We make choices... and life has a way of making us pay for them." (Episode 8)

"- That's what men do, they make threats. And you, more than anyone, know they have the ability to carry those threats out. - And you, more than anyone... you know that their threats and even their violence.... cannot touch the things that matter." (Episode 8)

"- What the fuck you talking' about, Gorski? - Not fair? - This is the real fuckin' world. - Nothing's fair." (Episode 8)

"- You keep using "us" and "them". Who are we? - Who we are is less relevant than what we are, and what we are is different from them." (Episode 9)

"- I know how that feels." (Episode 9)

"- But at a certain point, I realized there's a huge difference between what we work for and what we live for." (Episode 9)

"- Can we just fast-forward to the end of this shit?" (Episode 10)

"- Killing is easy... when you can feel nothing." (Episode 10)

[cherryflavoredbutch]

Why do you have tme in your bio?

Would you have racism exempt, antisemitism exempt, transandrophobis exempt or homophobia exempt?

Because I constantly refer to myself as trans on this blog, and I want there to be no ambiguity — I am not transfeminine, and I am not subject to the virulent and SPECIFIC kind of transphobia that transfeminine people are subject to. This is so I can be held accountable if I ever say or do something as a non-transfeminine person that I shouldn't.

I'm not exempt from homophobia, I say in my bio that I'm a lesbian. I don't need to say that I'm "racism exempt" because I already say in my bio that I'm white. I am not Jewish and have never claimed to be Jewish. When I say that I am trans, this could be misconstrued in such a way that I want to make it very clear that I do not experience transmisogyny.

I'm not doing this "transandrophobia" shit with you guys. We can argue that there are a handful of things that transmasculine people experience that transfeminine people generally do not (to argue that these things constitute their own, specific form of oppression would be much more difficult), but by the way you all have conducted yourselves in this discourse, I can't view the "transandrophobia"/"take tme out of your bio" movement as anything but a childish tit-for-tat temper tantrum over the fact that some of us are doing the bare minimum to hold ourselves accountable and acknowledge that one part of the community we belong to experiences a specific and particularly dangerous version of transphobia that we cannot and should not claim to experience. And I can't help but feel like this is upsetting to you because you do not care about the actual utility of declaring yourself tme. It feels like you guys can't stomach the thought of admitting that someone experiences more hate and violence than you do, because this would feel humiliating to you, so you have to go out of your way to align yourselves against trans women, as if they're privileged for having all this attention on them, until everyone admits that ~we have it hard TOO you know!!!¡!~ Yeah, we know, you're a trans person, it's called transphobia.

We do not need to further atomize the word transphobia, nor do we need to stop declaring our exemption from transmisogyny, just because you are feeling left out of the ongoing discussion about violence and hate speech directed at trans women specifically. This is not the issue you think it is. Look inward and ask yourself why admitting that someone in your community might experience more violence than you bothers you so much. If you want to be a member of a community, get used to the idea of prioritizing community members who are, in general, most in need of community support — WITHOUT the expectation that they should have to acknowledge your experiences as a condition of that support. Educate yourselves on transmisogyny. Sort yourselves out. Until then, block me. I don't want to discuss this with you and I don't want you here.

I'm not answering any further asks, replies, or DMs about this.

[ablednt]

This is not directed at people pointing out the ways their experiences differ or demanding respect for highly impacted disabled people, acknowledging the differences and the spectrum of needs is it's own discussion and is essential

But I think part of why the more recent trend of functioning labels or stand ins for them as being fine actually and "if you don't use this word as its exact clinical meaning you're appropriating it" is so off putting to me is because IRL it is absolutely a Fight against abled people for solidarity.

Online there's the expectation to organize everyone into neat little boxes and for discourse to be streamlined and focus on labels and words rather than intention or action and that's its own problem for another post

But IRL isn't like that.

If someone is going into a tangent about how their nonspeaking relatives are poor lost souls unable to think for themselves unworthy of legal and tangible autonomy you don't go "well I can't speak on this as a high functioning person but everyone deserves autonomy you should educate yourself"

They're going to call you stupid and they are absolutely fucking not going to educate themselves

What you do is you insist that the difference between their loved one and you is not so large as they think and to goddamn double down on it.

"You're different you can talk" No. I can talk sometimes. I can talk around you. I am not always around you.

"But you can still read and write and think clearly" sometimes. But there's a significant amount of times and situations that I can't.

Their ableism hinges on separating visibly disabled people from our own so they can dehumanize them and their experiences. We cannot let them do this. You have to break down the barriers they put up between themselves and the obvious truth (that their loved ones are being abused)

Yes if you have the ability to communicate much of the time that gives you undeniable privilege. But you need to be using that privilege to close the fucking chasm that ableds have created to justify their abuse. The difference between you and someone who has no accepted ways of communicating is not so big as you think it is this is why we share labels and share a community.

I cannot speak for anyone who isn't me but when I'm nonverbal I want to be treated with respect and when I'm overwhelmed and having humanity i fucking want and need patience and dignity and it you deprive others of that well you're being a fucking asshole and you'd do the same to me. Do not discount my experiences because you do not see them I am in the same community as your loved one for a fucking reason.

[khodorkovskaya]

I get frustrated with stuff like that too tbh

Like, I see people who can just book holidays out of nowhere and go and order loads of new clothes etc and I'm like????? A day trip on a local bus is a treat for me lmao

Or even at work and that, if I say I'm going somewhere like a day trip to a different part of the country (which is rare o havent been to many parts tbh) they're all like oh irs lively and start recommending all these expensive pubs and restaurants which are lovely but I'm like lol I cant afford that

But then I know people who have literally bought homes and I'm like lol I still live at home and in single haha, cant afford a car but there they go and in like??? How????

yeah and it's like their ignorance that really kills me. not to upset the leftist girlies, but like i don't have that much of a problem with the sole idea of some people having money. like your parents made money and now you're a nepo baby? okay whatever. but it's the ignorance of these nepo babies that gets to me.

like it really feels like we live in completely different worlds and they're never gonna understand us and grasp how privileged they are.

like i know that im already in a privileged position bc im a university student. but that's more or less reasonable bc, at least where i live, you need a diploma to basically do anything. it's a must. plus it's free so like might as well. but those people who go to elite british universities without thinking twice about it... like nothing wrong with that, good for you. but it just frustrates me how they go about their lives not being grateful for what they have.

but then again, how do i expect someone to be grateful when they have no point of comparison? and what does being grateful even mean really?

like when my manchester bestie was like "yeah i want my kids to do the IB and a bunch of extracurricular activities" i was like wow we really do live in different worlds. because on face value we have the same values, right? learning things as a child and keeping busy instead of playing on your ipad is objectively a good thing and i have nothing against it. but saying that you want your hypothetical future child to go to private school so easily is just like incomprehensible to me. and for her it's like a given. like of course she's gonna have the choice between a-levels and IB, it's only natural! so does everyone in her mind!

like when she was talking about how she got to uni and everyone who did a-levels were clueless about what was happening and she had an advantage bc she did the IB and learnt a lot more than those who went to regular state school. like yeah, that's life. that's how it is for regular people in england. you get a shitty public education, you take a loan if you want to go to uni, you have to work at the same time as studying if you have to move out of your parents'. like yeah. id want my kids to do the IB too. but it's a privilege, not a given.

[inevitably-johnlocked]

Hey Steph! This is kinda a weird ask but well, I don't really have a reason. Its just that I turned 20 yesterday and I feel so lost, so I was wondering if you had any advice on you know... navigating life in your twenties or something

Hey Nonny!

First off: Happy birthday! I hope it was a good one!

Secondly, Nonny, it's COMPLETELY NORMAL to feel lost at your age, honest to goodness. I certainly felt like my life was going nowhere at that age, being denied from college and stuck working a retail job with no benefits because they refused to give me the final 2 hours I needed to be full-time.

I actually answered a similar ask back in May 2022 from a Nonny who didn't know what they should do now that they were 19, and I think that the advice is fitting for someone in your place as well. The long-short (HAH, spoilers, it’s not short at all) of it is this, plus some extras I missed on that last post:

Get your finances sorted as soon as you're making some money.

You DON'T have to have everything figured out already. It's SO FUCKING ANNOYING that people y'all are supposed to look up to preach the whole grind-set mentality, which in turn makes people feel like utter failures before they're 25. It's SO gross and a horrific way of putting pressure on people that – let's be real – these people only see as chattel for babies or future mindless worker drones who won't question authority.

Take your time to figure out what you want to do. I took a two-year gap between high school and college, and I don't regret it. I didn't go back to school until I was 21. My gap years were used to work. I was also fortunate enough that my parents let me live at home rent-free during this time, so I KNOW that I am more privileged than most. If you can do it though, and it's safe for you to do it, I recommend it. It will give you time to REALLY consider your options and career choices, and not jump from course-to-course and accrue more and more debt.

University is NOT better than Community College. They drill the opposite in your brain when you're in high-school because – guess what – University costs more of YOUR time and money. Absolutely, there are things only Uni can do that you can't at college... think of it this way: if you want a more hands-on career that will give you beneficial skills all across the board, take college. If you want a career that requires a bunch of letters before or after your name, take university. It's literally that simple. I wish someone told me that in high school when I felt like utter garbage for getting denied from university. Now, nearly 2 decades later, I have a fulfilling career that I enjoy, for the most part.

Sometimes, University OR College isn't the answer. A lot of people just don't go on to post-secondary education, and THAT'S OKAY. North America (and probably other continents and countries) have made education a luxury product, something only those who get approved for loans or can afford to pay the admission fees can have. There's NOTHING wrong with being an apprentice for a skilled labour job, or wanting to work retail and want to move up in the company. Sometimes that's YOUR calling. Hoity-toity, entitled people will sneer at the same people who fix the electrical or plumbing work in their houses or make them their no-foam 7$ lattes in the morning, which I've always found rather hypocritical and hilarious. Do what's best for YOU, and not what's best for someone else. Heck, if YouTube is what you want to do, do that. Research. Go to Skillshare or Linda.com and self-teach yourself some useful skills. Do you like to write? Write that novel you wanted to, and fish it out for interest. Are you an artist? Make a serious go at selling your work.

Know your worth. I know it's hard, but please know that you are not any better or worse than someone else. Regardless of your path in life, know that people will pay you fairly for your skill if they're not a "choosing beggar" and know the value of it.

Learn about yourself. I had my journey of self-discovery in my mid 30's. I wish I had it sooner. Since you have the time, maybe start soul searching and asking yourself questions about yourself and what you want to do. It's a scary thing, but in the end, you will come out more at peace with yourself and the world around you.

It's okay to enjoy things, be it fandom, food, entertainment, a place, a hobby, or life itself. Don't let people tell you otherwise.

You're never too old to have fun.

Be your authentic self. Don't be shamed into thinking you're "cringy". And if you don't know who your authentic self is, I direct you to my "learn about yourself" point. I used to put too much value into what people thought about me, and to an extent, I still do care a bit since I sadly have divided myself up into 4 different people: Work Steph, Personal Life Steph, Fandom Steph, and Public Steph. It's a system that's worked for me, but it doesn't for everybody, and I wish now I could be Personal and Fandom Steph for my Public and Work Steph. BUT, again, I try my best to be my authentic self when I can these days... because honestly? Betty from Economics 1A won't even fucking remember your name in 2 years. Billy from Accounting will give no fucks about you after you leave your previous job. It's an unnecessary stress we hold ourselves to, thinking people care more than they actually do. And you know what? If they actually DO care in a way that negatively impacts you, that's THEIR fucking problem, not yours.

Parents and family aren't always right. Not gonna go into the full details here on my own personal story since it can be found across various other posts, but long-short is that sometimes, cutting certain people out of your life for your own sanity and mental health, despite your best efforts to try to keep some semblance of a relationship with them, is the only answer. You'll feel sad, but you won't regret the decision. Reading about psychology as a hobby in my spare time helped me see what was happening wasn't fair to myself, and looking at the situation from an outsider's perspective made me see that the person was doing more harm than good.

Therapy is GOOD, even if it's just a once-a-month thing. Now that I'm finally talking to someone about my own traumas, no matter how minute (and even some I wasn't aware even affected me), I'm finally understanding that what happened in the past wasn't my fault, and that my feelings of self-doubt are valid and we're working on learning self-love.

You don't have to have a significant other in your life to be happy. Another bullshit thing that going to religious schools fucking drilled into my head, was trying to convince me that I needed a man (HAH!) and a child (SNORTS NO THANKS) to feel fulfilled in my life. Well, joke's on them, I am 100% not straight, and 100% do not want kids NOR sex, so LOOOOOOOL (of course, I didn't know about the former until I did that soul-searching thing, heh. The latter was brought about mostly from retail work). Am I lonely? Of course I am, and yes, I DO want someone to spend my days with, but you know what I'm not? I'm never bored, and I make my own entertainment. I go to movies and on trips by myself. I'll eat at a restaurant by myself. It's honestly great. Downside is, though, now I'm FIERCELY independent, and I am REALLY frustrated if / when something disrupts my "normal" day. I need to plan a day with friends WAY in advance so that I can mentally prepare to be disrupted from my "timeline", that other people just don't follow schedules like I do. And that's okay.

Get hobbies outside of blogging. This is more self-advice to me than anything else. Don't let being perpetually online be the only thing you do. Enjoying the outdoors or knitting or going for a run are underrated. Being on Twitter or TikTok all day long is VERY BAD for your mental health. Learn to re-connect with people. I know this is hypocritical of me to be saying as the Tumblr addict that I am, but you're still young, save yourself, my god, lol. Seriously though, there's nothing wrong with spending a couple hours a day online, but unless it's your job, just... find something other than being glued to your phone or computer as a hobby. Playing a video game is just as productive.

Learn to cook and/or do basic home economics, like sewing and cleaning. Another thing they stopped teaching in school. I learned to cook in school. We had a home-ecs course in high-school. I learned basic sewing, and which chemicals should NOT be mixed together to clean. I learned I love LOVE baking. LOVE IT. And I'm an AMAZING baker. It's just TOO fucking hot in the summer to bake in my apt, lol.

It's okay to be stressed, and it's okay to cry as a release mechanism for that stress. I've been mocked in my younger years for crying when I'm frustrated, and in my older years I feel shame when I do. I'm not crying because I'm sad, I'm crying because I'm frustrated and stressed and a situation feels out of my control. My therapist told me it's a totally normal response, and I guess I just needed someone to tell me that, so I'm here to tell you that too. Regardless of your gender identity, IT'S OKAY TO CRY.

And branching off of that, you're not showing weakness when you show compassion and empathy for other people. Honestly, this world would be a better place if more people cared about other people in a genuine way.

Which segues nicely into: Never, EVER hesitate to show you care. Love comes in many forms, and saying "I love you" can mean the world to someone. I do it because I genuinely care about people, and because the one time I didn't say it, I couldn't ever say it to that person ever again. I wear my heart on my sleeve, and yes, I get hurt a lot, but for that one hurt I feel, I'm certain that 5 other people genuinely needed to hear SOMEONE, ANYONE tell them that they are loved or that someone is thinking of them. At least that's my hope, anyway.

There's a reason they're called "safe spaces" and even neurotypical people, and people who mock them need them, even if they don't realize it. My safe space is my bedroom wrapped in blankets and hugging exactly 2 pillows, with my phone and an old fave fic queued up in iBooks. Yours might be your car, or a place with lots of people, or an online forum, or heck, even your work's bathroom stall in a pinch. Sometimes we just need a place to go to to re-collect ourselves and mentally prep ourselves to deal with bullshit again. Find yourself a few comfort places, because believe me, as you get older and have to deal with more and more and MORE bullshit in today's economy and society, you will need a place to deescalate your mounting tension. I make sure I have one in every place I go to regularly.

So yeah, not much else I can think of at the moment, but I hope these will get you started. I hope you are alright, lovely, and I am sorry for the delay in a response... I just needed a block of time I could sit down and really give you a heart-felt response.

If I think of anything else, I'll tag them on here, but please know that, again, it's OKAY to feel lost. My lord, you're ONLY 20. You AREN'T supposed to have it all figured out yet!! Just... breathe, relax, and just let life play out the way it's supposed to for you. <3

Love you, Nonny!

And friends, if you have some life experience you would like to share with this smol bean, please do! <3

[boreal-sea]

I love reading other perspectives, and when I get a chance, I will certainly read that link.

As a trans man myself, I have a direct perspective on how closely trans men's issues are linked to feminism. I've personally written about how, if I had not become a feminist first, I never would have realised I was a trans man in the first place.

I've also written on how I as a trans man desperately need feminism, and how feminism in return needs transmac voices.

What I'm trying to say is feminism and transmasculinity is a subject area I live on a daily basis and have my own educated insights on.

---

Again, I understand being afraid of what other people will do, but I can't control bad actors, nor am I responsible for them maliciously misreading what I've written in good faith. To be honest, it wouldn't matter HOW I phrased it - those jackasses will twist it to suit their purposes anyway.

I really don't think me saying "Hey actually feminism the patriarchy is complicated and not as simple as man=bad and woman=good" is going to destroy the last 100 years of feminist progress.

And discussing the nuances of privilege and feminism and gender, and how being female doesn't always automatically make someone the most marginalized person in the room is a huge part of queer feminist theory. So I've been doing this for a few years now.

I think what I'd want someone to take away from what I've written is that yes, the patriarchy is real, and yes, men do in general terms have privilege over women in many/most cases, BUT, it's complicated.

I believe all people (including men) are in general responsible for helping to make the world a better place! I think we all inherently have that responsibility.

My hope is that showing men the holes and flaws in the patriarchy and how it doles out privilege to specific groups allows them to see that the patriarchy isn't benefiting them in the way they were taught it would, therefore motivating them to help take it down!

It's like... "look, you were told you were getting XYZ, but you're actually not, and it's actually hurting you in all these ways... so help take it down!"

Perhaps that is overly optimistic of me; maybe the majority of men think "well, I might not get the full benefits, but I'm still "better" than the women in my demographic, so fuck you".

But that kind of man would not be swayed by any argument about the patriarchy in general, so he's not really my target audience. And like, there are already men out there saying "Look, I'm poor, or disabled, etc, therefore I'm not capable of oppressing anyone in the first place". Men have been saying this since long before the internet existed.

---

As someone with intersecting identities involving manhood, I cannot commit myself to absolutes like "men are not oppressed", even with the implied "- for being a man". Because I am a man who faces oppression specifically for being a man. I am in a position where I, as a man, am less privileged than a cis woman of similar demographics!

And while I could, with luck, eventually "go stealth" and be perceived as a cis man, and could therefore theoretically benefit from cis male privilege, it would be entirely circumstantial and always come with the background threat of being "outed", in which case that privilege would immediately evaporate. Both trans and cis queer people have spoken at length about how "stealth privilege" and "closet privilege" do not exist. So my perspective on this is that the benefits of cis manhood trans men can access is a shadow of actual "male privilege".

So I am a man who cannot ever truly access "male privilege" under the patriarchy. And maybe that, as well as coming from a branch of feminism that from the very start taught me that the patriarchy harms men as much as it benefits them, allows me to be more open to seeing how other demographics of men do not fully access the male privilege offered by (specifically) White American Patriarchy.

also idk if that person cares to hear it but...... men of color exist. they exist, and the stereotypes of men being inherently aggressive and violent hurt them much more than they do white men. white women constantly weaponize that. people love comparing women shitting on men to poc shitting on white people but absolutely refuse to add in the part about how their radfem-lite rhetoric is racist as fuck. either you don't even consider them part of the conversation when you generalize "men" or you don't care about the harm your words can do them, either way, it's racist.

Exactly.

"Men aren't oppressed" - really? No man anywhere is oppressed? Men of color apparently just evaporate when racism gets discussed by radfems.

[coolamramerthings]

Landing Page Copywriting

Introductions

Copywriting is the art of writing for conversion. Your goal is to get people to do what you want them to do, whether that's buying a product, signing up for an email list... or just reading more. But great copywriting isn't limited to ads and landing pages. Any time you're trying to get someone else to do something, it's copywriting! And if you're reading this blog post right now (hi!), then chances are good that you've got some kind of conversion goal in mind -- whether it's getting new customers or simply increasing traffic on your website.

copywriting

Copywriting is a specialized field of writing that focuses on marketing and promotion. Copywriters write the text for advertisements, brochures, websites, sales letters and other marketing materials.

It's important to understand that copywriting isn't just about writing—it involves understanding your audience and what they want from you. Copywriters need to know who they're talking to in order to write effectively. This means taking into account their age group, education level and interests when creating content for them. It also means using language that's appropriate for those demographics (e.g., teenagers don't like being patronized).

Copywriters use persuasive techniques such as storytelling or testimonials in order to convey their message effectively; however, these techniques can be used tastefully so as not to come across as too pushy or obvious (which could turn off potential customers).

Start with headline

The headline is the most important part of your landing page. It must be short, clear and attention-grabbing. The headline should include words that are relevant to the content on your landing page and should have persuasive power.

When writing a headline, ask yourself: "What do I want my audience to think when they read my headline?" As you write your copy, keep in mind that it should sound like something that would appeal directly to them based on their interests or problems (i.e., "I want people who struggle with X to know about my product."). Also remember that headlines are often used as search engine results; therefore, you'll want yours to be specific and somewhat unique so that it stands out from other pages targeting similar audiences.

Understand what your users want

You need to know your audience.

You need to know your business.

You need to know your product.

You need to know your competition, and how they're messaging their customers.

And finally, you need to know what it is that you want people who visit your website or landing page (and eventually, purchase) so badly that it's driving them crazy - enough so that they'll pay money just for the privilege of doing so!

Design for conversion

The first thing you should do when writing copy for your landing page is to follow these design guidelines:

Use white space. White space, or negative space, allows readers to focus on the most important parts of your landing page—the headline and sub-headline. If you fill every inch of a webpage with text and images, it can overwhelm people and make them feel like they don’t know where to look or what’s important.

Use color to guide attention. Color helps identify different sections of your landing page so that readers know how each section differs from another section (and why there are different sections). You want people reading through your copy in order from top to bottom and left to right; this way they will see all the features/benefits of whatever product or service you're selling before making a purchasing decision based on those features/benefits alone rather than relying solely on price comparisons found elsewhere online.

Make sure that each paragraph has its own topic sentence; otherwise, it will be hard for readers who skim instead of reading completely through any given piece without seeing any patterns emerge between topics being addressed.

Use bullet points sparingly (only if necessary) because they make content appear denser which may cause users not to want much detail at all when looking into something new such as this particular niche within such a broader category field where there's plenty available already - keep things simple!

Landing page copywriting

Landing page copywriting is a crucial part of any landing page. It's the first impression you give to your users, and it should be simple, direct and engaging. Landing pages should be written in a way that engages and converts users.

To start with, you'll need to come up with a headline that clearly communicates what your product or service does. Your headline should focus on selling the benefits of the product or service on offer rather than describing what it is. You can then expand on this by describing how it works in each paragraph below (if applicable), mentioning any key features such as price and availability at this point too. Finally, you can end by asking for their contact details if they're interested in learning more about your product or service - this allows you to build up trust by showing them how easy it will be for them to get started using whatever it is that you're offering!

The right words will start a conversation

You don’t have to be a professional copywriter to write effective landing page copy. All you need are the right words. And I mean that literally if your words aren’t right, they won’t make a difference in how well your landing page converts.

Think about what types of words work best for you and your audience. You can use action verbs like “download” or “learn more” to give visitors an idea of what they should do next on the site; these kinds of commands push people forward toward completing their goal for visiting in the first place (e.g., buying). If your product is educational or informational in nature, consider using words that relate directly back to it—for example, if you sell dog toys online then use “playful petting toy!” instead of just “fun toy!” which could apply more generally across many different categories within e-commerce stores but doesn't have any relation specifically back toward whatever product category this particular store falls under (and therefore doesn't provide any additional value beyond simply stating its function).

Start with the headline, understand what your users want, design for conversion and use the right words.

There are some important things to remember when it comes to landing page copywriting:

Start with the headline. A good headline will get people's attention and draw them in, but also make sure that you're targeting the right visitors. You should be able to see what kind of person would find your landing page interesting based on the information you provide in your headline, so make sure that you're directing it toward those people.

Understand what your users want. Your goal may be to get the visitor to click on a link or sign up for a service, but there are other ways that this can happen—for example, if they need help from a product or service and are trying to figure out how much time it'll take them and whether or not they can afford it first before making any decisions about purchasing anything from You as well as making sure that you're actually offering something worthwhile enough for them (a lot easier said than done).

Conclusion

I hope I’ve given you some useful tips to get started with landing page copywriting. Remember, the most important thing is to write for your users, not for search engines or other external factors. You need to know what they want and give it to them!

[devsgames]

Game Dev is kindof the only think I’m interested in career wise but it seems so hard to get into. Do you have any advice on how to get more into the arena?

I'll be real: depending on your personal context and career goals, a career in game dev can be very difficult to land. Depending on the discipline and position you're applying to you might be applying against dozens, hundreds or thousands of other candidates.

Is it the most efficient system? No.

But is it a good system? Also No.

Anyway, how to get your foot in the door depends a lot on context that's difficult to cover based on an ask (e.g. your living situation, ability to move for work, ability to work at exploitative job in a similar position to gain experience, access to educational supports, what discipline you're applying to, where you want to end up, what your country's post-education system is like, your ability to support yourself while doing it, etc.). I've ran mentorships almost exclusively about focusing in on all this stuff because to know what actionables to take to land that career is so specific to your personal context and goals, so there's unfortunately there's little general advice I can offer that is applicable enough for everyone's situation. :(

Take my own experience: I was fortunate to land my first job in AAA through networking, learning skills via post-secondary education (also I'm a white person who attended college for Game Design in a country where post-secondary education is partially funded by the government, so I've got a lot of inherent privilege there not found elsewhere). Even then there was a period of a few months where I wasn't convinced I'd ever get an interview, and was more or less just biding my time and coming up with backup plans. I know people who landed careers right out of college, or never even went to college in the first place. It's all a wild crapshoot in some cases!

Some disciplines (like Design and Art) are often in low supply and high demand, while other disciplines like UX Design and User Research are in high demand and low supply, so your mileage will also vary a lot depending on what career path you choose and how lucrative it is.

Obviously I'm not saying it isn't worth pursuing a game dev career at all, but it's very important to know there's lots of work and serious effort involved in getting there and just how much depends greatly on that context!

Generally speaking if I had to think of tips for someone considering a gamedev path I might say:

Gamedev isn't a career path to pursue if you want an easy and typical 9-5 to put bread on the table. I've seen people who treat it as an easy-to-get 'gimme' job and put the minimal amount of effort in, and it never works out for them.

Practice the craft a bit first before you decide to pursue a career in gamedev; you might find you like games but actually don't like the work at all, or that it's something you would prefer to treat as a hobby instead of a full career. Without trying it out first you won't know!

Get comfortable with working with other people and building their ideas. People tend to enter gamedev to build the games they wanna make but 95% of any gamedev studio job will be working with others and being a conduit to make someone else's game or vision, especially in the beginning of your career.

For some general tips on getting ready to apply for jobs I'd recommend also checking out this ask where I talk about portfolios and networking - both are super helpful to put you in a position to be ready to apply to jobs and hear about opportunities!

The good news is that getting your foot in the door to the industry is typically the hardest part. Once you've landed a studio role, transferring between companies is typically much easier than landing your first job, and you'll have many more options to expand out elsewhere since you have established experience.

The other good news is that if we're just talking base gamedev skills there has never been a time when game development has been more accessible to people! There's tons of tutorials, free engines and assets online to help you build a solid skill foundation and play with the craft a little bit. It won't land you a job necessarily but these sorts of things are great for getting your toes wet with gamedev and building those base skills early or at your own pace for if you decide to hit the ground running with it!

Sorry it couldn't be much more specific about it, but I hoped this helped a little bit :)

[bruhstories]

Vogel und Jäger

Summary: You accidentally witness a murder, but the murderer takes pity on you. Pairing: Zeke Jaeger x Fem!Reader (mafia AU) Warnings & Content: murder, language, angst Word Count: 1.7 k

A/N: i've been dying for a mafia au with zeke so here's part one of the series Vogel und Jäger. i have two more chapters drafted, and i'll try to post for this series weekly so i can write some moooore for it.

Bang!

The blood-curling sound was familiar to your ears. A gunshot — followed by the gurgling of a man.

Bang!

Another shot and the gurgling stopped. Panic settled in your heart, making you jump back and knock the metallic bin which served as a shield against the perpetrators.

Shit.

Footsteps drew closer and you began to pray. Running was futile. Running was always futile. Your throat was dry, your mascara was smeared all over your cheeks from all the tears, lips chapped and bleeding.

Our Father, who art in Heaven...

The cold muzzle of the gun pressed onto your forehead and you shivered, breath hitching, eyes glued to the wet pavement.

Hollowed be thy name...

The Mafia never spared any witnesses, you knew that all too well, even if you happened to be in the wrong place, at the wrong time.

Thy Kingdom come...

"Hey, boss, we got a girl."

"Kill her."

"No, please!" You threw yourself at the feet and mercy of the armed man. "I'm sorry, I'm so sorry! Please, I'm only nineteen!" Through the sobs, your voice was still melodious, syrupy. So sweet that the boss stopped in his tracks.

Thy will be done...

Another pair of footsteps approached, tentatively, not as eager as the first person. You still haven't looked up, too scared to even blink, to even breathe.

On earth, as it is in Heaven...

"Hand me the gun, Yelena."

"As you wish, boss."

You felt someone crouch down next to you, someone dressed in expensive clothing, by the look of the trousers and polished shoes.

Give us this day our daily bread...

"You've got a very pretty voice." He lifted your chin up with the barrel of the gun, chills running down your spine.

"T-thank y-you..."

"Can you sing, little bird?"

"Y-yes."

And forgive us our trespasses...

Finally, you looked at the perpetrator — spellbinding grey eyes, platinum blonde hair slicked back and a matching goatee. His gaze was either boring or pitiful.

"Lucky you, we're hiring."

As we forgive those who trespass against us...

Anxiety coiled in your stomach, words caught up in your throat. You were still praying, unaware if this was all a sadistic joke or a miracle.

And lead us not into temptation...

Dark lashes fluttered, more tears streaming down your beautiful face as the gears in your head turned in a desperate attempt to understand what was happening.

But deliver us from evil...

"Hiring?" Your voice went up an octave when you saw the small stag pinned to the man's chest. The Jaeger family — the most feared mafia family in Paradis City.

For thine is the kingdom...

"A pretty voice like yours shouldn't go to waste." He got up and offered you his hand.

And the power, and the glory...

Reluctantly, you took it, helping yourself up and chewing your lower lip.

For ever and ever...

"T-thank you!" You told him, slender fingers squeezing his hand tightly. "I owe you m-my life."

Amen.

"Correct. Your life, your soul, your eyes and ears." He walked you to a car and opened the door for you. "Yelena, take us to the club. We've got business to discuss with my little brother."

•°.•°.•°.•°

Your eyes wandered all over the soundproof office, situated one floor above and opposite the stage. Every inch of the bar, the seating areas, everything was visible from that room. You tapped a finger on the wide window, eyes narrowed at the idea that it might, in fact, be bulletproof. These men were not playing, and you were now their property. The door opened and you jolted at the sound of music filling the office as your saviour walked in with two other people.

"This is my younger brother, Eren. You already know Yelena. I assume you know my name."

You nodded.

"Zeke Jaeger."

"Good girl." Zeke was pleased with your answer as he poured himself a glass of bourbon.

"I thought we didn't spare any witnesses." Eren shot you a look that made you regret being alive.

"Settle down, little brother. Tell us your name."

"Y/N, sir. Y/N Y/L/N." You swallowed, fingers fiddling with the hem of your blouse in an attempt to calm your nerves.

"You see, Eren, Y/N can sing." Zeke opened a drawer and pulled a gun out. More guns, more panic. Your eyes widened and your plump lips quivered when he aimed the gun at you with one hand, glass of alcohol in the other. "Sing or I paint the walls with your brains."

Your legs almost gave in at the threat — you knew it wasn't an empty one, and with all the courage you could muster, you closed your eyes and sang the first song that came to your mind, fucking Kiss from a Rose.

Your voice seemed to coat the people with honey, all three of them somewhat relaxing at the sweet sounds coming from your vocal cords.

"See, I told you she can sing." Zeke put the gun back in the drawer and closed it, swirling the bourbon in his glass before finishing it.

"Where do you live?" Eren crossed his arms, still suspicious of you.

"Historia's." You told him, eyes drifting to the ugly fur rug on the floor.

"The orphanage?"

"Yes."

"But you said you're nineteen." Zeke intervened, a brow quirked at you.

"I am. I try to help as much as possible in exchange for a bed and a roof over my head." You explained, eyeing the white couch that looked so incredibly comfortable.

"Just sit down already." Eren scoffed and you rushed to the furniture, mumbling thank you’s over and over.

"And why were you on that street tonight?" Yelena spoke for the first time since you came to the club. You looked at her and she seemed just as suspicious about you as Eren.

"I... the man you k-killed... he was... I'm-"

"A prostitute." Zeke nonchalantly interrupted you.

It was true. People like you, orphans, didn't have the privilege of being properly educated and finding well-paid jobs. Paradis was a jungle, and you did everything you could to survive. Everything.

"Well on the bright side you don't have to do that anymore." Zeke shrugged as he sunk deeper in his chair, feet on the desk, but you sensed he wasn't entirely honest. "You do have a beautiful voice, and our last girl had some... business to attend to, so you'll be taking her place."

"Is this why you called me here?" Eren sighed, leg impatiently shaking.

"Don't be stupid, of course not. I need Armin to prepare this month's tax reports and I need you to keep an eye on the police. They're sticking their nose in our business again, and I want them out of it. You two can go. Y/N, you stay." Zeke waved his hand and Eren and Yelena left, music briefly filling the office again.

You twiddled with the cushion in your lap, waiting for your new boss to say something. Being in that room was nerve-wracking, and you felt the air grow thick. Eventually Zeke took off his glasses, fingers rubbing the bridge of his nose as he sighed.

"Sir?" You dared, voice feeble and frail.

"What?" He clicked his tongue and you instantly regretted speaking.

"Sir, I'm not educated, but I've been on the streets long enough to know that every man or woman has a purpose..." You placed the cushion back. "...and a price. What's my purpose? I doubt it's only to sing."

Zeke nodded, fingers tracing the wooden desk.

"You're right, it isn't just to sing. It's to distract."

"Distract who? And from what?"

"You're asking an awful lot of questions for someone who's just witnessed a murder. You best not go to the police." He narrowed his eyes, piercing your soul. You sighed and walked to the desk, taking a seat opposite Zeke.

"It's not... my first murder." You confessed to him.

"Oh? My dear, you're full of surprises. Pray, tell. Drink?"

"Yes please." You answered, throat dry as a desert. "I can't go to the police. And even if I could, I wouldn't." The drink earned a disgusted look from you, but it was better than nothing. "Two years ago, I ended someone's life. He deserved it, he broke into Miss Historia's orphanage and tried to... to..."

"I understand." Zeke stopped you. "And if you go to the police, they'd do a background check on you." He continued, satisfied that he had a leverage in case you decided to turn against him.

"Exactly. And Historia helped me so much, I wouldn't want to put her in danger. So, I'm asking again, distract who from what?"

Zeke walked to the window, telling you to follow him. He pointed at two men, a tall blond one, and a short brunette one.

"See those two? They're policemen. They work for us, but we suspect they're double agents." He explained before pointing at three other men. "Those we suspect of being Marleyan mobsters. You see, Y/N, we have a lot of enemies. And we must keep our guard up every second of our lives."

You nodded, perfectly understanding Zeke's words. Paradis was a chess board and only the filthy rich played — the rest of you were pawns.

"Sir, you spared my life, and I know I can't ask for anything in return. But please, please don't drag Miss Historia into this. The children there did nothing wrong." Tears pooled at your eyes, rolling down your cheeks and you wiped them with the back of your hand. "I swear my loyalty to you."

"For someone uneducated, you're extremely clever." Zeke's voice was serious. You half-smiled at the compliment, but you knew the mess you got yourself into cut your lifespan severely. "Can you shoot?"

"No, sir."

"It's alright, Mikasa will teach you. Sleep on the couch tonight, I'll have Yelena bring you a blanket. Tomorrow you'll swear an oath in front of the family. And if you want to protect Historia, you'll move out of the orphanage."

You nodded. You understood that mingling with the mafia endangered everyone you loved, but you couldn't stop yourself from crying the entire night. Historia was but a few months older than you, yet she gladly took you in when she invested in that orphanage. Now you had to leave everything behind for her safety — and yours.

[nostuntmanneeded]

I've thought about the 'jabs' a couple of times as well and while I don't exactly condone namecalling and that I do believe that people go out of line in a couple in situations, in my opinion, the ones specifically that were mentioned above like spoiled brat and things like that are not just plain petty and untrue remarks, because I can get where the frustration is coming from and that's a huge thanks to the long insightful tips. Try to go back to the recent thorough tip talking about Cultural Appropriation and the ones explaining what's wrong with her doing PR, it might help you understand things more. People are not calling her dumb because they think she's illiterate, she's being called dumb because the way she behaves is not on par with her age and the behavior of a person capable of acting and making decisions with good reason and responsibly and also has decent cognitive skills. She's not a child, she's a grown woman who is almost 30 years, she should know better. A reasonable person would know better than to make multitudes of unecessarry travels at the height of a global pandemic or at least know how to follow the protocols. Never forget that when she went back to the US, it hasn't even been a week upon arriving LA when she was found hiking outside and when she posted a picture of her at the cinema, it has been over a year since the pandemic started at that time, and she have made a lot of travels by then, you can't possibly tell me that she was not aware that she was supposed to isolate herself for two weeks. Even if for some insane reason, she truly was not aware if it, I wouldn't exactly call it wise and responsible to choose not to learn about the protocols of the country you're travelling to in the midst of a deadly and uncontrollable pandemic, and so is choosing to follow your boyfriend all the way to Prague and invite your manager and mom to follow you there like you're on some sort of vacation while they are on lockdown. The authorities and citizens are obviously scared for their health and safety, the lockdown was imposed for a reason, I'm pretty sure the last thing they want are tourists (who aren't properly wearing masks) roaming around while they're trying to keep things in control. I'd consider that dumb and inconsiderate. One thing I've learned from one of the tips is that you should not trivialize cultural appropriation as it's a complete disrespect and mockery to the oppressed people who owns the culture that is being appropriated. I can definitely see why people find her dumb for willingly participating in something like that, many people were just so hurt and infuriated that they find it unbelievable that someone would be capable of doing something like that simply found it insane and foolish. She's not a teenager, she's a grown woman well capable of identifying what is right and what is wrong, she needs to act her age and act responsibly. She's way too old to be this ignorant about a lot of things and not too old to know how to use technology at the same time, the internet is a vast and almost limitless platform to educate yourself, and it' free. It's not her friends or "boyfriend's" responsibility to teach her these things and to be the ones to make her take accountability she's old enough to know. "Dumb" doesn't even have to be necessarily an insult, sometimes there are just people who are essentially dumb and that's that. If she isn't dumb then I guess she must be fully cognizant of her actions, the consequences that comes with it and the amount of people that can possibly affected and hurt by her actions then and she's just consciously ignoring it and is deliberately choosing to be indifferent and selfish. Now, about the spoiled brat part, people are not calling her spoiled just because of the fact she's rich, she's being called spoiled because she's taking advantage of her privilege and making a career out of it. As mentioned before, it's one thing to use PR stunts to boost your career but to use it as the very foundation of your career is just unethical and unprofessional.

Pursuing a career as an artist is extremely exhausting in every sense of the word with all the drawbacks you have to deal with like financial issues, discouragement, anxiety, constant rejection and all that, artists go through a lot of shit, buying your way into an industry is a big insult to artist who basically beat themselves while trying to pursue artistry. Regardless if you tried to put some effort developing your skills, it doesn't change the fact that you cheated and that you possibly stole an oppotunity for someone who is way more deserving, it's such a privileged mindset and completely selfish. If you want to achieve something, do the work, and I mean all the work that is required, if you're really passionate about it you'd know for a fact that it would completely be worth it and that taking the long way instead of a shortcut would benefit and teach you more. I don't have that much to say about the talentless part because it's highly objective and talent is irrelevant to one's moral character but I think that comes from the people who've seen her work and was not impressed by it at all. Also the fact that she's using PR to build her career kinda implies that she herself is not convinced that she has talent, that she doesn't need to pull a stunt in order to be succesful because she's a capable person. Just my two cents.

Anon, you deserve to do a mic-drop!

While I'm not a fan of name-calling either, the names that were mentioned have a legitimate reason. They're not insults, but merely harsh criticisms at the things she's done and the things she continues to do.

This was perfectly said.