#if you can see exactly where i got lazy no you DIDNT. i said i did it fast

[ravenxbones]

i did this almost as quickly as humanly possible and my pen pressure is acting up because i need to replace the tip but i can never resist a good funpoison drawing. happy new year this is inspired by @spraypaintstainonawhitewall ‘s post here

[withonly-sweetheart]

Not Quite Right

You're Leon's mystery, he's your mystery. He defends your honor without hesitation, but being around you has him questioning his own morals.

a/n: k personally i didnt deliver with this one i kinda sold but im some kinda block rn needed tk get smth done 🤨😔 (useless core) might rewrite later if ive got inspo

there IS a part two with both a happy and sad ending because i cant let sadness take over but i also just read "if he had been with me" and so yeah ill update this with the links when i post those

tw: angst?? age gap if you squint really hard and look between the lines but nun too serious (theres also suggestive content but wtv)

" if you couldnt tell

they said teamwork makes the dream work

hell i had some help "

wc: 1.8k

The saloon was always bathed in a hazy lemon glow, glaring back at Leon’s squinted eyes as the sawdust kicks up under his boot heels. He peels away from the rowdy crowd and nods to the barkeep for another whiskey. He never really was able to read the small, messy names of absurd drinks scrawled onto the curling paper.

Groaning in frustration, he slams it down, digging his nails into the yellowing parchment. Across the table, he catches your eye, specifically those of which narrow directly at him.

Leon admires your uniform; short, tight-fitted burnt hazel dress. It’s always been ugly to him, but you look… ravishing in it, though his eyes are cool as they flit your way.

And he realizes something else, snapping through his mind rapid-fire.

No one looks at him like that and gets away with it.

“Another round?” he calls out as you saunter past. You eye him sideways but say nothing, shifting your stance at the regulars’ raucous shouts. Not the slightest bit bothered, Leon presses, “Looks like you know your men.”

“Is that so?” you smile, knowingly. “Well, I know that folks say you’ve been ‘passing through’ a while.”

Leon chuckled. “And what do folks say about you?”

“That I know things.”

Intrigued, Leon leans forward. “And what do you know?”

You lean in as well, voice low and intimate. “I know a desperate man when I see one. What are you running from, cowboy?”

“What do you think?”

“That you’re a no-account drifter always poking your nose where it don’t belong.”

Leon chuckles, tilting his hat to adjust to the sudden shift in light. “Reckon I’ll be poking around a while longer then.”

You consider him a long moment. Strangely, Leon wishes he knew what you were thinking. “We’ll see, cowboy. We’ll see.”

Leon smiles. "And what do you suppose that means, miss?"

You chuckle drily. "I’m sure you know exactly what I mean, sir.” And with that vague answer, you turn away, step away, linger in front of him for a moment longer before sauntering away, leaving him with pink ears and flustered thoughts.

If it were anyone else, Leon would’ve been irked. But something about you is different. He doesn’t know why, in a town full of women who adore him, you’re the one to entrance him. He also doesn’t know why instead of pushing you further away, he wants to get closer, unravel your mind like tangled yarn.

So when he walks in the next week, he sits in his regular seat and raises his hand, already spotting you swaying to the music in the back. He knows you see his curled fingers first, before you zero in on his face and the corner of your mouth lifts.

"You seem to have me all figured out." Leon says as you walk past, one hand balancing the drinks on a tray. He tilts his head, studying you curiously. "You’ve done your homework, haven’t you, sweetheart?”

"I sure have,” you reply with a slow, lazy smile, leaning over the counter so only he can hear. “It might come as a shock, but I actually might be using my senses.” You lean away, completely unaware of the effect your husky voice has on him.

He blinks once, twice, before a broad grin spreads across his face. “Well…”

“I’ve got your regular?” you offer, twisting over your shoulder to check the drinks. “On the house?”

“That’s my girl,” he praises as you hand him the cool glass, somewhat back to normal. But your words linger in his mind for an indefinite amount of time. Everywhere, anywhere, whoever’s talking, he wishes it was you whispering weakly into his ear.

Especially when he comes in, as if on a schedule, the next week. His eyes are on you but his thoughts elsewhere, his senses stepping in, flashing warning signs and ringing sirens in his head.

He watches you walk past a group of men he usually sees at this particular bar, in that spot, assuming they’re regulars. What really messes with his temper is when one of them whistles appreciatively and all their eyes immediately switch from your face to a lower area.

“Pay them no mind,” you say dismissively, snapping him out of his trance. “This town has its share of fools.”

Leon pretends to glance you over before returning his stern gaze to them, recognizing one of the rowdy patrons. “Like him?”

The man catches his eye and scowls. “You got something to say, drifter?”

Leon turns back to you with a roguish smile. “Reckon it’s time I shut them fools up, what do you say?”

You sigh resignedly. “Just try not to get yourself killed.”

<><><>

You perk up at the sound you already recognize as his boots shuffling across the wooden planks. You glance back down at the drink in your hands, slightly warmer than usual because he returned so late.

When he excused himself a few hours ago, you assumed he had work to take care of. He always came back, anyways, so why bother yourself with the details when you knew that if he wanted you to know, he would’ve told you.

“Well, where have you been-” You immediately stop talking at his appearance. Blood drips down the side of his face, staining the stubble he’s been steadily growing, trickling down his neck. A bruise lines his jawline, maroon and vivid against his pale skin. He staggers over to you, slumping onto a stool, an awkward lean to the right the only sign of his pain.

“Is that mine?” he rasps, reaching for the drink.

“Kennedy!” you exclaim, gesturing to his state and yanking the glass away from his outstretched hands. “What did you get into?”

“Nothin’.” But you hear the sharp inhale he takes before continuing, “Now, did you get all this ready for me?”

“Mhm,” you mumble, gripping your glass tighter, slightly concerned.

“Use your words,” he chides. And now you aren’t concerned as much.

God, he makes you feel so stupid.

“Yes,” you grit out, struggling to be heard against the bustling crowd.

“How ‘bout this?” Leon hums, not waiting for your answer. “Drinks are on me.”

You can’t help but let a smirk tug at the corner of your lips. “Yeah? Anything I want?”

“For a pretty little thing like you, yeah,” he muses, fully turning to face you. You get a better look at his soft, baby blue eyes, fluffy, sandy hair, the way the ivory lights cast shadows across the planes of his face.

“How about not getting into fights?” you joke. He arches an eyebrow as you pass him napkins. He smears the blood across his chin, right under his lips. You can’t help but stare as he tosses his head back to swallow the drink, imagining the liquid burning his throat. “Did you actually fight that guy? You know I was just jokin’ right?”

Leon rasps something you don’t hear, eyes glazed over. “This… is different. What’d you put in it this time, sugar?”

“Just somethin’ special,” you respond vaguely. “Thought you’d like it.”

“Tastes like shit,” he comments, gingerly pushing the glass away. “What, you going around assuming everyone likes what you like?”

“Last guy did,” you mumble, slightly dejected that he didn’t take well to your concoction. To be fair, you did mess up the first guy’s order, mistaking his single for a double and decided it wouldn’t bother Leon if you got him a different drink, right?

“Last guy’s taste ain’t mine,” he says simply, humming in compliance. You wonder exactly what happened on the way here, why he shows up every week without fail. “Tastes stronger than usual.”

“Can’t handle your drinks?” you jab, the corner of your mouth lifting. It’s always amusing to you when you watch a guy stumble out of the bar, so affected by something you made. It sent a feeling of power rushing to your head, like you could potentially control everyone here.

Or more specifically, the one person you wanted wrapped around your finger.

Leon.

So what if you kept him coming back, glancing up at him every time he left, silently begging him to stay for one more drink? You grew up learning that if you wanted something, you had to work for it.

“I can handle anything,” he slurs, words connecting themselves to the sounds he makes, small purrs escaping his throat and going straight to your head. “It’s just… heavy…”

“Heavy?” You chuckle. “Right.”

“What’d you put in this?” he repeats.

“Just the scotch.” Leon immediately snaps up.

“You know I can’t-”

“Can’t what, Leon? Because you know what I sure can’t do?” His surprised and somewhat curious expression spurs you on. “I can’t sit here and pretend that there’s nothing between us, keep you coming back here every week and have you leave me on the other end of your string.”

You poke him square in his upper chest, digging your finger into the little dip between his collarbones. “And although all the other girls you take to bed can handle that, I sure can’t.”

“I’m… leaving you, sweetheart?” Leon chuckles dryly. “As far as I can tell, you’re the one walking away from me.”

“You walk in here and call me your pretty thing, then leave like it’s nothing!”

“My pretty thing?” The swinging lights dance across Leon's face as he turns, searching my gaze as if seeing new things.

“How much longer? This isn’t how you treat-” In the midst of your rambling, something switches in the air between you and Leon grabs the side of your face, leaning forward, eyes defiant yet demanding.

Quicker than the setting sun through hot summer dusks, he bends his head until your breath mingles, hot and sweet.

And when his lips meet yours, they taste sweeter than you expect, fuller than you see on the outside, like you’re tasting what you can’t see. At the touch of his other hand cupping your head, your doubts slip away.

He doesn’t need words to tell you what his pride had kept tied up tight before. You hear yourself make a sound of protest as he pulls away, suddenly, harshly, eyes shadowed by… regret?

“I… shouldn’t have… shit,” he seethes under his breath. Leon pushes back from the table, the legs of his stool grating against the wooden planks. His brows are knitted tight, like he’s wrestling some demon you can’t see.

You reach for him again but he flinches away, not meeting your imploring gaze. You realize it’s like looking at a stranger wearing Leon's face.

The thought wrenches your heart, so desperately, you plead, “Don’t go. Please. Stay. What do you need to say?”

“I… need to go,” he says, voice trembling. “This was wrong…”

"Don't do this," you beg, hating the tremor in your voice but powerless to still it. Weeks of yearning lead to one perfect moment, shattered before your eyes.

"I'm sorry." The words break on Leon's tongue like he doesn’t mean much to them. He backs towards the door, unraveling with every step while you watch, helpless.

Moonlight throws his anguished profile into sharp relief as you plead, "Stay. Tell me what's got your hackles up, cowboy."

But Leon only shakes his head, hands drawn tight. "You know this won’t work. Us… we can’t."

The words land like blows, stealing your breath. You stagger after him onto the porch, heart cracking down the middle at the distance in his eyes.

"You're running scared is all." Your own voice sounds small and far away. By the set of Leon's shoulders, you know this was a battle you've already lost. “You think you’re not the right one.”

“That’s it,” he says, eyes crinkling at the corner with his smile. “Atta girl.”

“Why?” you insist. “If the shit between us is mutual-”

“Because you’ve got your whole life in front of you, girl!” he says, exasperatedly. “I’ll just fuck everything up for you.”

“But-”

“No buts,” he cuts you off, voice final. But you can hear how it hurts him too. “I’m not heartless. I’ve got a conscience, and as much as it eats away at me, I won’t let it have this one too.” His dull eyes find yours. “I won’t let it have you, too.”

He pauses at the top of the stairs, silhouetted against the inky sky. When he turns, there’s no trace of warmth left in his smile. "Take care of yourself, sweet girl."

Then he’s gone, swallowed up by the dark. You sink onto the creaking steps, tasting tears and the agony of loss, the stars uncaring as they sparkle down at you.

[arthur-lesters-balls]

geto suguru, gojo satoru, and fatalism

im here once again with a long rant that i didnt really bother to reread. if you squint you can see it as a jujutsu kaisen 0 analysis. theres a part where i talk about geto in what can be seen as someone presenting passive suicidal thoughts, but its neither heavy nor explicitly about that so. just warning.

lately ive been thinking a lot about geto being left alone to do whatever he wanted for 10 years because gojo, the only person strong enough to defeat him, simply never tracked him down. almost as a consequence, i eventually put this together with the fact that, even though yuta was the one who did the "difficult" part of defeating geto, gojo was the one to deliver the final blow

one of the first things geto said after seeing gojo in that alley was "to think you'd be the one here at my end", but lately, i cant help but think: wasnt that actually the most obvious end? was there ever any other option of closure for them? and ive been into the idea of stsg + tragedy (as a genre) since i wrote this post, so this somehow resulted in me looking at them with some kind of lazy fatalistic lens

i really like stories where the character tries to flee from an imminent tragedy, but always goes back to the same place, because that is his fate. and, to me, this is exactly what happened with gojo when he tried to avoid killing geto. he didnt go after him, he spent 10 years standing still, believing the distance would be enough to run away from that moral duty

and then geto came back

and then geto went after gojo students. and then geto was the one who made their meeting happen. and then geto was the one who broke that barrier gojo had put up to avoid thinking about that unhealed wound. suddenly gojo was back to shinjuku, ten years ago, with geto saying that killing him or letting him go was his choice and that there would be a meaning to it

and i keep asking myself what was going on in his mind at that moment when geto appeared at jujutsu high? did he acknowledge that irony? did he acknowledge how that seemed like a bad joke being played on him? how long did it take for him to accept what that meant? was it in the classroom, after their talk, looking at the sunset and thinking about how they were actually quite similar to yuta and rika? changing the place of their conversation to the middle of the street, the same place where rika died her premature death? did he think about how they were also stuck at each other, cursed by love, and how the one who placed the curse must be the one to remove it? how, as said by the novel, the curse of geto suguru was a burden only he would be able to carry?

and this whole thing also made me think about geto. we know for a fact he thought that their friendship was over, that he wasnt someone gojo held dear anymore. we also know he thought gojo deserved to hate him, to curse him, to not take that last meeting of theirs and waste it treating him kindly so, to geto, what justified the fact that gojo never found him? i genuinely dont have a theory. im not even sure if i have a hypothesis that is in any way backed up by canon. but, what i can say almost for sure is that he never got it right. and him thinking gojo and him were best friends is proof of that

then the question thats left is: was geto ever aware of the tragic irony of his death by gojos hands? was dying by gojos hands ever a tragedy from his perspective? the way he never put up a fight against that possibility says otherwise. looking at his ideals, living a meaningless life seems a far more tragic thing for him. but wasnt that what he was doing already? doing his best for a goal he knew made no sense? whenever i think about geto saying he didnt expect gojo to be the one there at his end, i cant help but wonder: was that said in a positive way? was that a surprisingly satisfactory means to go? being killed by the person who cursed him and also the person he loved the most; to geto, was there a more meaningful death than that?

[juyomiao]

NAURRR I FORGOT TO SCREENSHOT THE NOTIFICATION💔 but tumblr was being saur cute sisbissnks it was like

juyomiao has posted

we noticed they're one if your favorites❤️

or smthn along the lines of that and ACK IT WAS SAUR CUTE PLS JSBKSNSKSKA-

anyways idk if u can answer the first one but it's still cool hshshshs

✩ do you have/ can you give some not-so-spoiler spoilers for o.o? (hahajahs u made me obsessed w this and im not complaining)

★ your mtl biased member in cravity? (just ur preferences, u may put reasoning if u want :] )

✩ fav/recommended tbz songs? (im really planning on stanning they seem fun ajajasjs)

★ *IF* w1 is really pursuing with the greek mythology shit, which god/goddess (there's a possibility) do you think bin is going to be? (and state ur reasons hshs)

omg tumblr being cute (unexpected)

☆ uhhhh idk how to give spoilers without spoiling everything so all i can say is what i alr said : its getting more angsty bc i like being cruel n ruining things 🤭 BUT dw it will have a happy ending and the funny elements of the fic r not going anywhere bc thats still the most important part to me

★ okay omg this is hard wait

disclaimer ofc i love all the members

minhee : he was my bias in x1 too so even when i didnt rlly stan cravity i still considered him my cravity bias lmao hes also the proof i have a 'type' when biasing idols bc . the minhee - younghoon - sunghoon trinity explains a lot abt it

serim : he was the reason i got more interested in cravity bc i was watching a cravity park episode n realized how fine he was so ,, yeah . kind of surprising bc he was one of the two members i didnt rlly know abt before stanning (i knew minhee hyeongjun wonjin n jungmo bc of produce n knew seongmin taeyoung n allen bc ppl talk abt them a lot) but im so insane abt him to the point something i said after seeing one of his pics became an inside joke in my friend group

seongmin : my bbg hes so cute n pretty n soft n i love his voice so much . n lately i've been wanting to eat him too .

hyeongjun : ofc knew him bc of x1/pdx n already loved him back then but now even more . in the nicest way possible hes insane hes not normal but thats exactly why i love him

this is where it gets more complicated bc i cant rlly rank them ? like probably woobin n then jungmo wonjin n allen more or less on the same level ?? like even i would expect jungmo n wonjin to be higher but . heres a fun fact‼️i watched produce without subtitles ! so i remember little to nothing abt it n had no idea what was going on ⅔ of the time !! bc i used to watch it when they livestreamed it on youtube n then was too lazy to go look for the subbed ep ,, then i got more attached to minhee n hyeongjun bc they were in x1 obviously

that was so long im sorry but u cant give me a perfect opportunity to infodump abt my special interest / hyperfixation n . expect me not to do it

☆ OHHHH OKAY so idk what music u like more so this list might be a bit questionable bc i like everything even noise music . but i'll focus on b-sides !!

walkin in time , only one (obviously , the queen who inspired my fic title) , melting heart , l.o.u , text me back , daydream , espionage , shake you down , scar , salty , goodbye , checkmate , shine shine , insanity , prism , kiss me if you can , hush , kingdom come (i'll never get tired of saying it , tbz were robbed on that bitchass show FUCK MNET) drink it , out of control , nightmares , merry bad ending , hypnotized , russian roulette , one dance , sweet , c.o.d.e , survive the night , levitating , awake , savior

tbz's entire discography is honestly perfect have fun stanning them u wont regret it‼️‼️

★ honestly idk😭���� when i was younger (n we r talking abt 5yo until 14yo so it was . a while) i was sooo obsessed with greek mythology but my brain just . wiped all that information away😭 so i genuinely dont know

[threepointseven]

Hhhhhhh I don't know if req is open butttt can you do a hc or scenario of Childe, Diluc, and Kazuha where they're holding a crying reader while comforting them because of family issue till readers cry themselves to sleep with their face buried into them? I can't handle pure angst It's ok if you can't do it I generally love your works-

This is also my first time requesting so it took a lot of my courage and to ask this I also practiced

🌺summary!🌺- your parents said some majorly hurtful words, but you always have your lovely boyfriend to hug you to sleep while you cry on him.

Type- scenario 🍄+HC’s 🌷

Flowers included!🌼= Kazuha x gn! Reader, childe x gn! Reader, diluc x gn! Reader

Note🍀= HEOOOO IM SORRTY THIS TOOK SO LONG OB EM GEE. I HAVENT BEEN ONLINE LATELY IM SO SORRYY☹️☹️☹️☹️💪💪

Genshin masterlist

💐Your bouquet has been delivered <3💐

Kazuha

- Kazuha was literally so chipper and excited to meet your parents, the people who brought you into the world!

- He even brought gifts and such as you walked to your parents house with a slight gloom in your step. He didnt know why but you seemed scared almost. He wasnt sure what you were scared of but he intertwined your hand with his to try and settle down the fear.

- The meeting with your parents wasnt exactly what the poor samurai expected. At first everything was normal, he gave the gifts greeted them and made small talk. The peacefulness didnt last too long as theyre opinions about you started getting more insulting as the night progressed.

“Oh thank you dearly for dealing with Y/N! You know how they are~!” Your mother was especially sour to you the whole night. “Ah.. i dont get what you mean..?” “Oh kazuha you know! Theyre all irresponsible and lazy, and dont even get me talking on how utterly pathetic her life is to be honest!”

Your boyfriend was stunned at the casual statement, your mom laughing it off as you looked down to your feet. A clear displeasure in your eyes. “Ah theyre got that right, really y/n how did you manage to snatch a samurai? Cmon tell me! What did ya bribe him with?” Your father was no better from your mom, laughing at those hurtful jokes as you whispered a firm ‘stop..’

“Well i dont see y/n like that… im inlove with them they didnt bribe me.. and their life isnt pathetic..! Theyre a hard worker and i love every bit of them..” you could see the blush on Kazuha’s face as he attempted to defend you.

“You dont need to lie like that! I mean y/n isnt exactly someone you call datable.. just look at them! Theyve always been kind of a waste of space from when they were little yknow?” The insult ended off with a small chuckle from your mom. Your thin string of patience broke as you stood up and raced out of the house, taking your belongings and walking out with small tear drops in your eyes

- after that whole scene kazuha quickly raced to take his belongings and following you, not without giving your parents a harsh glare of course.

- He brought you home while he attempted to wipe away your flowing tears, staying quiet till you got home.

- The moment you stepped foot inside that house he was all over you, repeating “dont listen to them darling your amazing!” like a mantra. Kissing your face and wiping all those tears away. He was cuddling up to you the entire time, not allowing you to escape until he could make sure any type of negative thoughts of you were gone.

- Forehead kisses? Literally everywhere. Cuddling? Already are. Need snacks? Hes getting some right now. He hates seeing you so sad because of your parents! The people he was sure he would love since well they raised you! His beloved, but they were monsters.

- But dont you worry your pretty little head, kazuha is here to kiss your skin and whisper praises in your ears till you fall asleep with his arms cradling you.

Childe

- Family is everything to Ajax. And that includes you of course. Your family to him and he couldnt wait to meet your family!

- A normal day of tiring fatui work turned tragic real soon when he walked into your shared room to be greeted with your sobbing figure, staining the bed sheets with your tears as you tremble.

- He quickly races over to you, immediately cradling you and pulling you onto his lap while he tries to squeeze what happened out of you.

“Hey baby… shh shh… cmon sweetheart what happened hm..?” The auburn haired man cooed as he caressed his cheeks, your head buried in his chest while his legs cradle you.

Your tears stain his shirt as he rubs your back, your voice box unable to make any sounds except a few sniffles and pants. He wanted to get the reason for your tears out of you. Either it be an issue involving your job or a person. If a person was giving you trouble he’d be quick to sort it out but what came out of your mouth wasnt something he exactly expected.

“‘M sorry, ‘m sorry.. its just that—“ your sentence was cut off by a sob, your boyfriend quickly cooing you to calm down. “Do you need some water baby—?” “No… its just me and my parents had a big fight today.. i havent seen them in a while.. and i guess i didn’t expect it to escalate so fast and lucky me..! It ended with them shouting that they wish i was never born..”

The words that came out of your mouth stunned him. It left him frozen, shocked for a moment before biting his tongue in fury and pushing your head into his chest, rubbing your head as he placed kisses on your forehead. “Hah… im so pathetic.. ive seen so many people complain about their parents saying this without a single tear in their eyes and here i am—“

“Oh you have every right to be mad or angry. What horrid excuse for parents would say that to their own child..?!” Slow silent tears rolled down your cheeks as he kept you close, your boyfriend complaining about your parents on your behalf. You couldnt help it. As each sour word about how terrible your parents are your head kept repeating that scene.

“Oh honey… shh.. hey.. it’ll be alright.. we dont need to visit your parents if you dont want to. We can cut them off, or maybe i’ll confront them. Dont let their words get to you baby.” The harbinger settled you down as those tears started flowing again, your face being given a hoard of loving kisses.

- As you calmed down he quickly went to fetch a bottle of water and your favorite snack, feeding it to you as you tried to wipe off the tears.

- He ended up babying you the entire day. Even insisting on carrying you. He’d kiss your face to sleep and mutter praises for handling those hurtful words so strongly. Brushing his hands through your hair as he tried to lighten up the mood by making jabs at your parents.

- He’s always wanted to visits your parents, the people who raised his future spouse but after seeing what theyre like he’d just stay away from them. Your smile is what matters to him and if they take it away and replace it with sobs than he’d rather cut them off.

Diluc

- He had to witness it himself. Your parents shouting at your face as all you could do was stay frozen with tears brimming at the edge of his eyes. He didnt even know how it got to this point, you said your parents were going to visit you for a short while and what he saw, instead of warm hugs and laughs he saw your parents stomping over to you with eyes of malice.

- He couldnt moved, his tongue bitten as he had to let the scene sink in. Your mother shouting at your face as your father pointed straight at you with those eyes of pure murder.

- He tried to hold back, he really did but he couldnt. Your father raised his hand at you, his palm seconds away from hitting your face before your boyfriend stepped in and gripped the wrist of your father tight, the pure strength leading his hand to go limp.

- Your father protested as your mom stood still, feeling threatened by Diluc.

“Y-your the man thats dating y/n huh-! Dont be fooled boy theyre a mess—!” Your dad was stammering as he tried to escape dilucs grasp. Your boyfriend let go of the hand, his eyes still cold and unsettling as he took ahold of your hand softly and dragged you out of the area

“Leave us alone. I dont need your blessing to date them and nor do i need your opinion on them if its a pure lie.”

- he dragged you back to your shared home, tears still drying as he pulled on your wrist. The moment you got into the house he cupped your cheeks and placed a soft, longing kiss on your lips. A beautiful one that wasnt too deep but wasnt too light. The comfort made tears flow out once more, maybe from the flashback or your happiness but either way diluc panicked. He wa stammering “sorry”s for dragging you so suddenly as he intertwined his hand with your and tried to lead you to couch

- Your tears flowed like a waterfall when you sat your head on his lap, he panicked but kept his expression blank. Patting your head and kissing your forehead as you let out everything, tears falling into your mouth while your hand clung to dilucs shirt.

- His lips on each inch of your face as you vented to him. His hand was itching to give your parents a taste of their own medicine but he knew you would like that so instead he promised to give them a Tiny tiny warning the next day…

- He pat your head to sleep as your mind went off about how much you loved him for taking care of you like this.

- He couldnt care less how much tears are on his favorite shirt at this point. As long as your back to smiling he is too.

[imthebadguyyy]

A/N - based off of this sinful photograph

Suggested listening - Wildside by Normani and Kiss It Better by Rihanna

Wildside

Pairing - Lewis Hamilton x Reader (fem!littlemix!reader)

Fandom - F1

Summary - You've been on tour for a while, and you miss your loverboy. But when he surprises you on tour, its bound to get spicy.

Warnings - smut (not well written)

The snap of hips. The soft groans and moans. The sound of pants. The sound of Rihanna's 'Kiss It Better' blaring through the walls. The bed knocking against the wall as Lewis's hands squeezed your hips, the intensity of the thrust pushing the bed against the wall. The high pitched moan that left your mouth as you reached your high, eyes closing as stars exploded behind your eyelids, as your boyfriend came right after you, your walls clenching as he came. Even after reaching your high, you didn't want to open your eyes, far too consumed in the earth shattering pleasure that was coursing through your veins, until a soft hand reached to pull your chin up, soft brown eyes looking into your own, clouded with lust and euphoria.

Pulling your mouth into his in a heated kiss, Lewis moved his hand to rest on your bare stomach, squeezing your tummy softly as he deepened the kiss. Pulling away he let his head droop onto your bare chest. "That was.." he began, far too blissed out to think of an adjective. "Godly" you said, chest rising and falling rapidly, trying to come to terms with the intensity of your orgasm. Laughing he leaned back up to kiss your nose, before standing up and walking to the bathroom. You heard the tap running, and the sound of the dustbin opening and closing. You closed your eyes again, the aftershocks still coursing through your body.

Opening them again slowly, you saw Lewis walk towards you, towel in hand, and a lazy smile on his face. He gently cleaned your thighs, finishing with kisses on both of them. He reached up and wiped your torso, which was gleaming with a thin layer of sweat, before running the towel over your nose, cheeks, eyes and mouth. He dropped the towel in the clothes hamper near the bathroom door, pulling on his boxer shorts and and pulling out one of his t shirts from the cupboard. "What about the clothes on the floor" you piped up, finally beginning to wake up from your post pleasure state. "When did it get so messy?" He said, spotting 5 different clothing items in 5 different corners of the room. "When you decided to run your hand up my dress in a restraunt" you replied, throwing him a fake glare.

"You liked it" was his cocky reply, smirk spreading over his face as you flushed and ran a hand through your hair. "I did not" you lied, watching as he raised his eyebrows. "Oh really ? Thats not what you were saying 5 minutes ago- oh wait, you weren't saying anything at all. You were too busy moaning my name to say anything else-" "OKAY fine I loved it. Now shut up and bring your fine ass back for cuddles"

*-*-*

That was a month ago. Now you've been away for nearly one and half months, away with the girls on the LM5 tour. You loved touring, it was the best part of being a singer, getting to see the music you girls made together come to life on a stage in front of thousands and thousands of screaming fans. It was a thrill like no other. The only problem was that you were away from home. Distance was never an issue for the two of you, after all, he was a Formula 1 driver. It was very rare that he was home, except during the breaks and the gaps till race weekend, but ever since you two had started dating, he tried to be with you whenever you could. Sometimes, your shows would be in places where the races were too, and then he'd definitely turn up. But it was a difficult thing to do all the time, and some nights on tour were spent pulling all nighters as you talked to each other on the phone, till one of you eventually fell asleep.

But you knew when you started dating him, this wouldn't exactly be a regular relationship. The two of you were doing your dream jobs, and they were both extraordinary. And you were willing to put in the work you had to put in to make the relationship work, and you did. Yet here you were in Madrid, feeling heartbroken and desperately wanting your boyfriend by your side. It had been a rough couple of weeks, you were jet lagged and tired, and although this was the second leg of the tour, and you had had a break, it was tiring. It was hard going to bed every night alone, when all you wanted was to cuddle your boyfriend.

Little did you know, Lewis was feeling the same. In fact he had missed you so much, he had told Angela and his publicist to cancel all events for a week, while he flew out to Madrid to see you. He had missed you, he had missed you more than he could put into words. But he also wanted to surprise you. Pulling out his phone, he scrolled down to Leigh Anne's contact, and sent her a text.

Lewis, Leigh Anne

Hey. Is Y/N asleep ?

Hey! No, she's in an outfit fitting.

Okay that's good. I need your help with something.

Sure how can I help ?

I want to surprise her by coming to see you guys in Madrid.

Oh thats wonderful ! She's been a little down in the dumps. I think she misses you.

I miss her too.

Let me know when, and I'll send a car to pick you up.

I'll be there on Saturday. Landing at 3:15 and I should be at the hotel by 4:30. Then I can get ready and surprise her at the show.

Okay done. I'll send the car around 5:30,so you can rest for a bit. You should be here by 6. The show's at 6:15.

Thank you! Can't wait : )

I'm so happy youre coming to see her ! I'll let the girls know.

*-*-*

As soon as he had finished texting, Lewis decided to start packing, the prospect of seeing you again sending a buzz of happiness running along his veins. God, he had missed you a lot. He turned to Roscoe, the dog sitting by his feet, looking up at his dad with his head cocked to one side. "I'm going to go see Mumma, Roscoe" he explained, smiling as the doggo barked in response. He wouldn't be able to take him to Madrid, he'd have to leave him with a dog sitter, but he couldn't feel too bad about it, since he had had Roscoe with him even when you were gone. And besides, Roscoe enjoyed the dog creche. He couldn't wait for Saturday.

Later in the evening, he sat down with a glass of wine, while the ringtone of your FaceTime rang through the empty house. After a few more seconds of ringing, the call was picked up, your tired face coming into view. "Hi darling" he said, noticing the tiredness in your eyes, and how much you were struggling to keep them open. "Hi bubs. Did you finish eating?" You asked, rubbing your eyes. "No, I've ordered soup" (did anyone get the reference ;) "Oh okay" was the reply. "What about you? What time is it?" "Its 9:20 AM" you replied, gently rubbing your eyes again, forcing yourself to stay awake.

"9:20? Thats pretty late baby. Why are you still sleepy?" "We were recording till 4 AM, so Im functioning on like 5 hours sleep right now" "Oh damn. Go back to sleep then baby" "Can't, rehearsal" was you reply, making him furrow his eyebrows. "Okay I guess. But don't tire yourself out" "I won't" "I love you" he said, smiling at you. "I love you"

*-*-*-*

The Madrid show was always a fun one. The fans were loud and you loved it. They were one of the best crowds you girls ever played for, and the show had its own adrenaline and excitement. But it was difficult to give a 100% when you were tired, but you really tried, you did. During Power, you hit highnotes you didnt think you could, during Woman Like Me you danced like there was no tomorrow. During Wasabi, you brought your sass level up to a 1000. It was during Bounce Back that you caught sight of a very familiar face in the audience. Unable to actually grasp if you had actually seen Lewis, you turned to Jade, who was on your side, and looked back at the crowd and back to her, asking for confirmation.

The smirk she gave you was answer enough. After that, focusing on giving an excellent performance increased tenfold. Every swirl of your hips, every flip of your hair, every wink you threw at the audience, it was all five times sexier. In the crowd, your boyfriend was well aware of what you were doing, and it was fair to say that you were succeeding at it. He could feel an uncomfortable sensation around his pants region, as his cock twitched uncomfortably in his pants. He couldn't wait till the show was over, and you two could have a show of your own.

*-*-*

"That was amazing darling!" Lewis said, spotting the 5 of you in your dressing room. "Oh look its Mr. Loverboy!" Perrie said, cackling as you rolled your eyes at her, before running up to your lover and jumping into his arms. "Hiya Bub! I missed you!" "I missed you too love. That's why I surprised you. I couldn't stand another day without you at home" he said, wrapping his arms around your waist to keep you stable as you jumped into his arms. A chorus of "awws" echoed throughout the room, as the girls watched your cute little interaction. What wasn't cute however was the comment Lewis made in your ear, hiding his face in your ear so that the girls couldn't see. "I can't wait to get back to the hotel. I saw the performance you were putting on for me baby. You have no idea how hard I got, how uncomfortable I was standing in front of so many people when all I really wanted to do was fuck you"

You could feel your mouth become dry, and your heartbeat quicken, and you could feel the area between your thighs become wet. You tightened your grip around him, letting your crotch rub against his very softly. "I think it's time to go" you mumbled against his ear. "Okay girls, as lovely as it was to see you, I think it's time we go back to the hotel. I'm pretty worn out from travelling as well" "Yeah I'm pretty tired too" you replied, faking a large yawn. "Alright then, we'll see you guys tomorrow!" Leigh Anne said, leaning forward to give you a hug. After you finished hugging all the girls, the two of you made your way to the car, eagerly waiting to get back home.

The car ride home was tense. The tension was apparent in the air, reverberating through the air, choking you in a way you revelled in. The air was thick with tension, and it was suffocating you in the best way possible. It was almost too much to take. When the hotel came into sight, you practically leapt out of the car, and rushed to the door, an equally ruffled Lewis beside you. But he was not going to give in to you so easily. He enjoyed seeing you flustered. And he was not a person that gave someone what they wanted when they asked for it,no. He was going to have you desperate for it. Smirking to himself, he made his way to the reception, grabbing you by the waist as he went.

Throwing him a confused look you followed, slightly frustrated. "Hello sir, how can I help you?" the man at the reception asked, eyes going slightly wide as he recognized the two of you. "Hi! I just wanted to ask, till what time is your pool and spa open?" He asked, sliding his hand down to the back of your dress. "The pool closes at 10 pm sir, and the spa at 9 pm. We open the pool at 7 am and the spa at 11pm"he replied, struggling to maintain his professionalism as he spoke to one of the best drivers in Formula 1. "Alright thank you. And what time does breakfast start?" Lewis asked, hand pressing down on your ass, ever so discreetly. "Breakfast is from 6-10 am sir" "Thank you so much"

Next to him, you were fuming. Of course he was going to ask questions to which he already knew the answers to. A painful throb between your legs made you let out a small whimper, and the man at the reception looked at you with concern in his eyes. "Ma'am are you alright?" He asked, eyeing your stiff posture and tense state. "Yes, just tired, thank you" you replied, a little stiffly, but it was hard to concentrate when Lewis's promise of fucking you senseless kept replaying in your mind. "Alright then, good night" Lewis said, biting back a smirk at your flustered state. He knew getting you all riled up would lead to some seriously earth shattering sex, and he couldn't wait. But first, he definitely wanted to tease you, to push you over the edge, just a little more.

Your room was on the 16th floor, and as the two of you made your way into the elevator, he eyed you up and down, eyes lingering on the curve of your breasts. The minute the door shut, he pushed you against the wall, capturing your lips in a steamy kiss you'd be remembering the next day. His hands moved to your ass, squeezing hard, eliciting a moan from your lips. The moment your lips parted, he was pushing his tongue into yours, his other hand coming up to pull on your hair roughly, relishing in the gasp that left your lips. As suddenly as he started, he stopped, pulling back and standing almost nonchalantly against the wall.

Trying to wrap your head around what happened, you gripped the wall with your hand, feeling your legs grow weak to a point where you felt like you couldn't stand on your own. You could feel your wetness dripping, threatening to run down your thighs, as the throbbing became even more painfully exciting. You looked down at the floor, eyes closing as your frustration grew more and more by the second. Finally, with a little 'ding', the elevator stopped at the 16th floor. The moment the door opened you stepped out on wobbly legs, trying your best to walk properly. But of course, that wasn't going to happen. As you turned one long corridor, Lewis suddenly grabbed your waist, pushing you against the wall again, to reach down and suck on your neck. You let out a gasp, and tried to run your crotch against his, but the retaliated with a slap to your ass, smirking when a high pitched moan left your lips. Lifting you up against the wall, he mumbled against your ear "the key card" your clouded mind was unable to process the words, too consumed by slight relief you were getting. "Get the key card baby" he repeated. This time you noted it, reaching down to his pants pocket to pull out the key card. You couldn't resist running your hand over his cock, feeling how rock hard he was. The thought of him fucking you senseless returned, and you let out a groan.

Grabbing the card from your hand, he opened the door, propping you up against the door in your bedroom. His eyes were filled with a raw, animal desire, as he dropped the card on the floor and reached up to unzip your dress. He ripped the zipper down, your dress falling to the floor in a crumpled heap. He locked his eyes on your heaving chest, hand reaching up to grab your chin, pulling you in for a searing kiss. His hand slid up your torso, reaching behind to unhook the red lacy bra you were wearing, letting it drop to the floor as he took in the glorious sight in front of him. You waited, wanting him to just touch you, but he just stared, eyes looking into yours, clearly saying "beg for it"

You couldn't help the soft "please" that left your lips, too desperate for some sort of touch. "Please what?' Lewis said, tightening his grip on your waist. "Please" was all you could say again, nearly whimpering again at the rough look in his eyes. "Use your words baby. Now, please what?" "Please just touch me!" You finally gasped out, moaning loudly when he licked a stripe down your chest before taking your right tit into his mouth. His hand fondled the left one, running his thumb over your erect nipple, the rough pad of his thumb sending shockwaves of pleasure through your body. His mouth sucked on the skin of your tit, before moving down to bite down on your nipple. You gasped again, pain and pleasure coursing through your body as his tongue ran over your nipple over and over till it nearly felt raw. He switched his actions, moving his mouth to your left tit instead, letting his hand harshly fondle the other. He continued the same process of biting, licking and sucking, till he was satisfied with himself. "I fucking love this baby. Seeing you all wet and needy for me. So what do you want? My mouth? My fingers? My cock? Or does my baby want them all ?" He asked, watching as your pupils dilated and you let out a strangled moan.

You let your crotch rub against his thigh, gasping when the friction went straight to your core. "Look at you darling. I asked you what you what you wanted, and you picked my thighs? Well, I want to see you dripping. I want to see you cum on my fingers, my mouth, my thighs and especially on my cock. I'm going to make you cum over and over and over again till you can't even stand on your own fucking legs. I want your thighs to be shaking around my head. I want to see you moan and groan and scream my name so loud, by tomorrow everyone in this hotel will know my name, because you'll spend all night screaming it" you moaned again, his words going straight to your core."Please Lewis, God, just make me cum please!" The desperation of your cry was enough for him to carry you to the bed, dropping your body onto the soft mattress.

He pulled of shirt, unbuttoning every button so you could see him do it. He could see your eyes grow dark, as his compass tattoo came into sight. You had told him it was one of your favourites, and he had used it against you ever since you had told him that. Smirking at you, he climbed onto the bed, lying down between your legs. You pushed yourself up against the headboard, spreading your legs wide for him. His eyes grew dark, as your core came into his view, shimmering with your juices. A near animalistic growl left his mouth, the sound hitting your core. He moved so that he was situated right in front of your core. He let his eyes take in the sight of you in front of him, snapping back to reality when you let out a groan of frustration. Throwing you a devilishly reassuring smile, he inched neared and nearer, till his nose was nearly touching your clit. Then he just lay there. Not moving. You could feel your heartbeat hammering against your chest, chest heaving up and down, an alarming intense feeling growing in your tummy. Finally, when it became too much you let out a small scream of frustration "Oh for fucks sake Lewis please just fuck me!" Your outburst brought a smile to his face. "Oh I will. Just not yet" and with that, he ran a finger along your slit, before finally slipping it into you. You let out a moan, finally getting the friction you had been desperate for. His fingers circled your clit, thumb gently pressing down, before he removed it,only to slam it back down on your sensitive clit, earning a scream of pleasure from you.

He slipped a second finger into you, scissoring around your clit, as your desperate cries of "oh, oh baby! Fuck, fuck lewis-" were lost in the heat of the moment. He leaned his head down to your core, letting his tongue run along your slit too, before licking around it, collecting your wetness on his tongue, before letting it harshly circle your clit. You bucked up into his mouth, feeling his tongue wrap around your clit. He sucked the nub harshly, his fingers still moving in and out of you. "Oh God, Oh GOD, Lew-I- oh! Oh God!" Your broken moans were music to his ears as he sucked your clit into his mouth. You could feel a strange intensity growing in your stomach, feeling a lot stronger than your usual orgasm. The band in your tummy was threatening to snap, but you needed that something more to help it snap. That something more came when Lewis sucked your clit into his mouth, letting it rest in between his teeth, before flicking it with his tongue.

With a cry of "Oh fucking hell, Lew-" you camr gushing into his mouth, your juices coating his fingers and gushing onto his tongue, as he let you ride out your orgasm on his deadly skilled tongue. Well, he had got his wish. Your thighs were shaking around his head, as your body tried to come to terms with the intensity of the pleasure coursing through your body. Looking down, you saw him with his painfully hard cock, grinding down on the sheet, as he let out a moan at the relief the bedsheets gave him. Raising an eyebrow, you patted your thigh, signaling him to come over to you. "You loved on me so well bubs. But I can see how hard you are. Do you want to use me to get off?" You asked, watching the effect you had on him. All he could do was nod, as you sat up on your knees. "Stand up" you ordered, getting up from the bed as well.

You walked over to the wall, letting your body rest against it. Somewhat confused, Lewis followed you, standing in the space between your legs. "I tried to get off using your thighs didn't I? I think you'll enjoy it as much as I did. So use me. Use my thigh. Get off" looking at you in pure shock, your boyfriend moved forward, groaning when you pushed your leg against his throbbing cock. He relished in the friction, slowly beginning to move against your leg, moaning when he began to rub against your leg. He began to hump your leg faster, as the pleasure began to build up in his body, before you reached your hand down to cup his length in your hands, moaning when you realized your fingers didn't quite meet. You ran your fingers along his length. You pumped him, letting your thumb circle his sensitive tip, eliciting a soft whine from him. You circled faster, moving down to your knees, and letting your tongue run up his shaft very softly. Above you, Lewis slammed his hands against the wall, groaning when you took him into your mouth.

But a part of him still wanted to cum inside when he was fucking you (in a condom, because wrap it before you tap it) so he pulled you back up, smirking when you whined. "I know baby, but I just really wanna fuck you now. Back on the bed please, unless you want me to take you here against this wall" practically running, you clambered onto the bed. You watched as Lewis pulled out a condom, ripping the packet open before climbing back on top of you. He let his hand rest on your hip, eyes temporarily losing some of the animalistic need that had been present in them. Leaning down, he connected your lips together in a kiss, a searing, intense kiss that took your breath away. "Ready love?" He asked, looking into your eyes, looking to see if there was even a slight hint that you didn't want this. But you did.

With a sudden jolt, he thrust himself into you, groaning when your warm walls clamped down on him. His hips thrust into you, starting off slow, letting you adjust to his massive length. "My sweet baby,taking me so well. Does it feel good?" You couldn't even respond, mouth agape, as his the pace of his thrusts increased. "Answer me" he said, suddenly stopping. Almost crying out at the loss of pleasure, you looked at him with desperation. "Yes yes, fuck it feels so good, please don't stop!" "Thats all you had to say baby" he said, before pushing in again, slowly. Then, he pulled back out. Looking at him in confusion, you gasped when he slammed back into you, a high pitched moan of "Lewis!" leaving your lips. He moved so that he had a better hold of your hips, rocking the both of you back and forth, the intensity of his thrusts was so much that the bed knocked back against the wall. What he wasn't expecting was for you to take his left thumb up to your mouth, running your tongue over it before sucking on it.

Moaning, he started thrusting into you even harder, shifting so that he was directly hitting your g spot. "Oh, God ! Oh fuck, Baby that feels so good please keep going keep-oh!" The cry that left your lips was so loud, you were sure Perrie in the room next to yours had heard you. "Fuck baby, you take me so well" Lewis said, as he nearly hammered your g spot. He was so, so damn close to cumming, and when you leant up and bit a sensitive spot on his neck, he came, gushing into the guard between you two, but he wanted you to cum to, so he reached down to pinch and rub your clit, still riding out his orgasm in you, moaning when you came with a scream. He winced when your core spasmed on his sensitive cock, and he pulled out slowly, before collapsing next to you. Panting, you curled up to him, letting your hand rest on his compass tattoo. "Okay that was Godlike" you said, earning a tired laugh from your lover.

"Yeah it really was. I missed you" he said, allowing you to nuzzle into his neck, leaning down to press a kiss to your forehead. "I missed you too" you replied, kissing the tattoo. "I love you too" As you lay there together, still revelling in the moment, your phone buzzed. Reaching over to check it, you saw your groupchat with the girls flooding with messages.

-*-*-

Perrie 🧚🏻‍♀️ - Y/N, I'm filing a noise complaint. 🍆

Jade ✨ - Pez 😂 let them be. It's been a while for her.

Leigh ���- She really got some tonight huh? 😏

Perrie 🧚🏻‍♀️- LOL she did !! And it was obviously some goooood 'some' *wink wink*

Jade ✨- I could hear em too, and Im on the other end of the hall.

Leigh 🦋 - I know I did too! Must be some damn good sex. 😏

Perrie 🧚🏻‍♀️ - Go Y/N !!

Jade ✨ - Can't wait till she reads this.

Perrie 🧚🏻‍♀️ - Are they still going?!

Leigh 🦋 - No 😂 she's reading the messages. Y/N!! Yoohoo!

You - yes I'm here 🖕🏽

Jade ✨ - Did you have fun babe 😏

You - ..... yes

Perrie 🧚🏻‍♀️ - babe you can't really say no because we heard you

You- Im not saying I didn't have fun. But you guys need to calm down.

Leigh 🦋 - But its funnn

You - okay byeeee ❤

Perrie 🧚🏻‍♀️ - Going for a round 2 😏?

You - okay I said bye.

Leigh 🦋 - she is !!

Jade ✨ - Go babe !

You - I need to leave this group.

Perrie 🧚🏻‍♀️ - No we love you !! ❤

Leigh 🦋 - Yeah don't leave us ❤

Jade ✨- Don't leave meee ! ❤

You - Haha I'd never leave you girls ❤ now bye.

Jade ✨ - bye babe !

Perrie 🧚🏻‍♀️ - bye you sexy minx 😏

Leigh - bye hun 💙

*-*-*

Smiling to yourself, you put your phone away, to see Lewis looking at you with a raised eyebrow. "Who was it?" "Just the girls" you said, cuddling back up to him. "What did they say?" Giggling, you looked up to him and kissed his neck. "They said they're going to file a noise complaint. And they asked me if we were going for a round two" "Were we really that loud?" He asked, looking at you in surprise. "Yeah, even Leigh heard us and she's at the end of the hall!" "Damn" Lewis said laughing. "Well," he said, looking at you again, with a cheeky look in his eye, "they were right about one thing" "And what is that?" You asked, smiling at him mischievously. "We are going for a round two"

*-*-*-*-*-*-*

@maxverstappenx @grandestrategia (because you are worth it 🦋💙)

[quiilio]

No thanks, but i still like you // albedo x reader, xiao x reader

Summarry // you reject their love confession

Warnings // fluff to angst :'D, gn!reader (uses they/them pronouns)

Notes // requests are open! please read request rules before requesting something :v i got really lazy at the end of albedos and xiaos whole part so uh yeah

stories under the cut! enjoy~☆

|| Albedo ||

Albedo wasnt human. He didnt have the proper understanding of basic human emotions like you did, yet he had a general idea. He wasnt new to this of course, he had experience in these kinds of things. But he didnt understand the concept of romance— that was the only thing he struggled with.

He never really engaged in the romantic aspect of life; he was a busy man who had better things to do rather than focus on his feelings. After all, it was unlikely that he would ever feel romantic attraction to someone, so why would he waste time on understanding those feelings when they were irrelevant to him?

However, even though it was unlikely, there was still a chance. And that chance was with you.

How did this happen? Well, its simple. You were a traveling biologist from Inazuma, arriving initially to study animal life in the different regions of Teyvat. You had just come from discovering life in Natlan, where you were able to inspect tons of foreign life forms. But you were excited to finally be in Mondstadt— youve been here before and was delighted to be back. Mondstadt was truly a beautiful place, and its citizens were even better. You stayed in the region for 3 years once— it was certain that many people would be excited to hear about your return. However, the only reason youre coming back is because back then, you werent exactly... qualified to experiment with Mondstadt biology and stuff, so now that youve finally finished your studies, the only place left for you to experiment things at, was... here.

Albedo played a large role in your excitement to travel overseas, you were looking forward to meeting him. You knew about his knack for biology as well, he was quite smart in that field. It was one of his favorite fields of research after all, always studying different ways to create life.

You had finally arrived in the city, yet you noticed that signature blond hair youd see in photos of the alchemist. You smiled in enthusiasm as you hurried over to the man.

"Hello... Albedo, correct? Youre the cheif alchemist at the Knights of Favonius. My name is [y/n], a former student at Sumeru Academy. Ive heard great things about you." You introduced as you found yourself next to him. He stared at you as his walking halted, a look of confusion on his face.

"Ah, [y/n]. So youre the biologist that was rumored to be arriving today, I see." He said, his voice quiet as if he was talking to himself with his hands placed on his chin. "I myself have done my research on you, and I must say— your knowledge surprises me. I admire your intelligence," He spoke louder this time, his voice was smoother and softer than you had imagined.

"Oh, thats— thank you." You laughed, looking straight ahead to the beautiful city in front of you. "I was hoping that we would be able to connect on astute levels while Im here; it would be wonderful if i would be able to hear the thinking of one of the smartest people in Teyvat."

"Ah, you flatter me. I would be more than happy to show you my comprehension in the alchemical field, and... would possibly hope to learn more about general biology if we have the time." He became quieter near the end, as if he was embarrassed at his proposal. You nodded either way, you were quite excited to finally be able to work with Albedo, the man who youve been practically dying to meet ever since you heard about him. His level of understanding was high; and you wanted to meet that level as well.

"Of course! Is... hmm, say 3pm a good time to meet up?" You asked, looking over at him who was staring towards the large Windrise tree. "We can meet up in Dragonspine, or..."

"Dragonspine is alright. We can schedule a gathering at 3pm, and I can bring you to my campsite." You agreed, and after talking a bit more, you decided that it was best to head off.

"Well, I should get going. I wanted to do some stuff in Wolvendom, if you dont mind me leaving." Albedo waved you goodbye before heading back to the town as you went the opposite way.

After that encounter, Albedo couldnt get you off his mind for some reason. The image of you both working together in his campsite, talking together; he couldnt stop thinking about the events that would take place later that day. He knew you, of course he did. He knew many biologists, alchemists, scientists— he knew so, so many. But you were his favorite, you were smart, charasmatic, and overall just a great person. He could help but feel this way, the way you both were able to connect with each other sparked something in him.

That was at least a year ago. Visiting Mondstadt, visiting Albedo made you want to stay in the land even more, especially because youve had such a great time here ever since you arrived.

You and Albedo were meeting up today, at that big tree in Windrise; aka near the place that the both of you met at. It was his idea, he told you that he wanted to talk to you about something. You agreed; you thought it would be something related to your guys' work.

"Thank you for coming," Albedo said, walking towards you as you were sitting up against the tree. You waved as he stood in front of you, his hair was neatly tied and braided, and his outfit was straight and freshly washed. He knelt down in front of you snd looked at you in your eyes. "There was something I wanted to speak with you about."

"Sure, what did you need?" You asked, and Albedo took your hand in his as he looked down. You watched as he toom a deep breath in before looking bsck up at you— his face was slightly redder than before. But that is probably because of the blazing sunlight that shone on you both.

"...I want to inform you, that im not... exactly used to this feeling I have. Its foreign to me, and if i make you uncomfortable, please let me know." He spoke lightly, almost in a whisper. You nodded, so he continued.

"I have, this... emotion, towards you. Attraction, if you will. I am attracted to you. Uh, in a romantic sense." You widened your eyes in shock at his confession, you never imagined that someone as secluded and private such as Albedo wouldve felt this way to you.

"Oh wow... Albedo..." You muttered, him still looking deeply into your eyes. You didnt know what to say— you were flattered at the fact that he had feelings for you. However, this wasnt good. Considering the fact that you would be leaving in a few months, and...

...You just didnt like him back.

"I-I dont know what to do," His face dropped at your words; he knew you would reject him. He sighed and stood back up, helping you stand aa well. "I just... you already know, dont you? Im sorry..."

"I understand. I completely understand, dont worry about it. I'll leave you alone now," He spoke, but as yoy were about to stop him, he hurriedly left.

|| Xiao ||

Xiao was an adptus— a living being who didnt understand the concept of love as easily as others. He knew some basic components of the feeling, like what people do when theyre in love, and other things. I mean, hes been living for over 2000 years. However, hes never personally been in a relationship. Nobodys ever had the guts to ask him out, let alone even look at him. Hes too intimidating, and so its surprising when you found out that he was attracted to someone.

You and Xiao were... close? You didnt understand your guys' relationship. One day, he would be very talkative with you, and the other days you wouldnt talk to him at all for days on end. So he was a bit weird to be close to, but you enjoyed the time you both spent together nonetheless.

Today, you were going to visit him on behalf of his request. Last night, he had managed to get into his home apparently you didnt know that he was able to teleport, even though youve known him for years now, and he "accidentally" woke you up to tell you to meet him at Qingce Village. So you complied, and as you neared the spot he told you to meet him at, you saw a glimpse of that signature green polarm swinging in the air.

"Xiao!" You called out to him, catching his attention. You could hear him grunt before teleporting to you.

"I apologize for not being here when you arrived. I was slaying a few demons nearby," He explained, but you only waved your hand in dismissal.

"Its alright. What did you wanna talk about with mr?" You asked, sitting down at a nearby table with Xiao following behind. He stayed silent for a bit, you began thinking that you had said something wrong.

"I... wanted to ask you something." He spoke, quietness enveloping you both again. You and him didnt dare to make eye contact— the atmosphere was too awkward. You heard him take a breath, so you glanced up at him to see his eyes looking at you.

"Ive been having these feelings. Im not used to them, and... I know you know about these kinds of things, which is why I need your assistance."

You looked at him in confusion, before remembering how he had told you earlier about how he likes someone.

"Oh, sure! Are you feeling romantic attraction towards someone? Who is it?" You asked excitedly. You could see as his face became red.

"Its— you." His statement caused you to fluster a little at his words. You leaned over the table, getting close to his face.

"Huh?! Xiao, are you being serious?" You smiled, and his face lit up. Were you about to accept his feelings for you?

"Yeah... is that a bad thing?" He smiled as well, but your face dropped. He watched you in confusion as you leaned back, playing with your hands.

"Uh, kinda... Xiao, youre a great guy, and i admire what you do for us in Liyue! But..."

Xiao knew what was coming.

"I just, y'know, dont feel that feeling towards you."

"..." Xiao looked away in embarrassment before standing up fron his seat, and walking a few inches away from the table before looking back at you. "I knew I shouldnt have told you this. I apologize." Was the last thing he said to you before he teleported away.

©︎ quiilio ; please do not copy and/or edit my work. Thanks :)

[denkamis]

hi!! could i get double chocolate and cherry with kaminari, shinsou and midoriya please?❤️

idk if i did this right so im sorry if i didnt!

to anon: hey anon, no worries! you did it perfectly :)) aww i love the characters you chose for this prompt, this is adorable. enjoy some fluffy times with these sleep deprived boys from a very sleep deprived writer <3

warnings: none! just some swearing and some bad sleeping habits lmao. reader is gn!

prompt: denki kaminari, hitoshi shinsou, izuku midoriya scenarios + “it’s okay, i couldn’t sleep anyways.”

denki kaminari

denki stays up late playing osu and minecraft

what can i say, he’s just a gamer man

so he’s honestly pretty reliable when it comes to you knocking on his door at late hours of the night

always the biggest cuddle bug, really happy that you go to him first out of everyone

literally drops everything for you hehe

lots of sleepy kisses too

“fuck! goddammit,” denki grumbled, shaking out his wrist as he had just failed the six star version of the intro of blend-s on osu. he had gotten rather addicted to the circle clicking game. this further resulted in denki staying up late on school nights, despite kirishima’s warnings of him potentially falling asleep in class the next day. it was fine, he could always borrow notes from you or jirou anyways!

as he went to restart the map again, a soft knock came at the door to his dorm room. spinning off his computer room chair, he prepared himself to be lectured by aizawa for the fifth time this week about breaking curfew. “aizawa-sensei, i know that i’ve been loud lately but i swear this time it won’t happen- y/n?” he stopped mid-sentence as he saw you standing on the other side of the door. “what are you doing up so late?”

you shook your head, immediately hugging his torso instead. you were clearly a bit distraught about something, but denki wasn’t a mind reader. he figured that from the way you were clinging onto him, it must have been a bad dream of some kind. “hey, hey, easy there! nearly knocked me over, huh,” denki laughed lightly, pressing a soft kiss to the side of your head before closing the door behind you. you clung onto him, face buried in the crook of his neck. it made a small blush dust across his cheeks, a warm feeling spreading through his arms as he held you close. “i hope i’m not bothering you,” you mumbled, to which denki hummed. “you never bother me, babe. it’s okay, i couldn’t really sleep anyways.”

the two of you stayed like that for a long while, denki swaying the two of you back and forth. you could feel gentle lips peppering the crown of your head with kisses. as your heart rate slowed, denki piped up. “wanna stay here for the night? my bed’s missing out on some action! and by some action, i mean sleep. i really can’t sleep.”

you snorted at his words, your eyes flicking up to his goofy yet endearing smile, his eyes bright yet a bit tired from late night gaming. he poked his tongue out at you, making you roll your eyes with a tiny smile of your own gracing your features.

“how could i say no to that?”

hitoshi shinsou

we already know he’s up at these unholy hours

not for any particular reason, just because he can’t really sleep

quite the insomniac that one

and the fact that he can’t sleep properly or well unless you’re with him

you smell like lavender in the morning too bc he puts it in his pillow to help him sleep, thank you

shinsou lay awake in bed, eyes trained on the ceiling as he waited for himself to fall asleep. it was no secret that he barely got any rest, so it was simply easier to just sit and wait until his body exhausted itself to the point where he simply fell asleep. staying as still as he could, he kept counting the amount of times he breathed in and out. it made him acutely aware of his surroundings. the crickets outside his room, the way the moonlight streamed through his blinds, the miscellaneous creaking sounds of the dorms. yeah, he definitely wasn’t sleeping tonight.

he didn’t flinch as the door to his room opened, blinking slowly as his eyes adjusted to the light spilling into his room along with a new figure. “y/n?” he asked, not bothering to sit up. “hey, are you up? sorry toshi, i couldn’t sleep,” you explained softly, allowing the door to close behind you as you tiptoed across his dorm room. his hair was sprawled across his pillow, deep violet locks hiding his hands situated behind his head comfortably. it showed off his arms that were built from training for when, not if, he ever got into the hero course.

a lazy smile crossed his lips at your words, his heartstrings being played by you so seamlessly. “it’s okay, i couldn’t sleep anyways,” he replied with a tilt of his head towards you. he moved over a bit in his bed as to give you space to lay down next to him. you crawled beneath his comforters, inhaling the scent of lavender as you did. apparently shinsou had said that the smell helped him fall asleep easier. strong arms wrapped around your waist, encasing you in a protective embrace as your head rested comfortably against his chest. the comforter was thrown over the two of you. you felt so much safer already.

his large hands were placed on your lower back, his thumbs drawing lazy circles on your skin as his breathing began to relax noticeably. hiding your smile, you cuddled closer to him. to this day, you had never seen shinsou fall asleep so quickly since that night.

izuku midoriya

baby is up studying for a test that’s in like 2 weeks

either that or he’s on an all might video spree on youtube and no that is not the first time this has happened, it is certainly not the last

he has so many stuffed animals in his room probably, like he just has them stuffed in his closet

the all might plushies stay on the bed tho

his cuddles are unmatched tho, change my mind

izuku was pacing around his room, vocabulary words spinning about his mind as he counted them on his fingers. he was mumbling definitions to himself, going over all of them in his head before referencing his notebook to make sure nothing went wrong. amidst his ramblings, a knock at the door made him jump to attention. “come in?” he called out, watching intently as he saw you come into view. his face showed relief, grateful to know it wasn’t aizawa or kacchan complaining about his incessant pacing.

“would it be alright if i sleep here tonight? i’m worrying about my grades and stuff again,” you rubbed the back of your neck with a small smile, trying to play off your question as relaxed as you could. it wasn’t exactly a secret that you had a crush on the boy in front of you. he was kind and humble, wanting to help as many people as he could despite all the circumstances that had the world against him. it was admirable. even now, he looked so concerned from the clear lack of sleep you’ve been getting these past few days. “of course you can sleep here. ah, wait! i have to, ah,” he stumbled over his words as you looked to the bed to see not one, not even two, but four all might stuffed toys on his bed.

“oh.”

midoriya’s face erupted with crimson, shoving the plushies into his closet as he sputtered out various excuses as to why they were there in the first place. when he turned back to you, you were giggling. not at him, but because of the entire situation in general. “you’re adorable, izu,” you told him gently. a light feeling bloomed in his chest upon seeing the smile you held for him. you looked so undeniably beautiful to him, the way your hair was a bit messy and how you stood in your pyjamas. while others, including yourself, would find that you looked completely normal, midoriya loved seeing you be so casual, so comfortable around him.

“you’re sure i’m not interrupting you, though?”

midoriya returned your smile with his own, stepping forward to intertwined his scarred fingers with your delicate ones. “it’s okay,” he murmured softly, holding your hand as if you were the most precious thing in the world to him, “i couldn’t really sleep anyways.”

all works © denkamis 2021.

tags:

@meilbox @honeykami @httpfirx @strawberrysalwa @hey-i-really-miss-you @smexy-goose @satis-kei

want to be on the taglist? see this post!

[ground-riot-jack]

Buzzed

kei tsukishima x reader

authors note: uh enjoy pls cause i did :)) also this is mostly unedited so there’s prolly hella mistakes. happy thanksgiving thooo love you guys

not my gif!! also 18+ ONLYYYY

warnings: uh oh where to start// weed use. mentions of being high, NSFW, daddy link, choking, overstimulated, degradation, little bit of praise, thigh fucking, finger sucking :)))

summary: basically you’re high with tsukki and yall fuck but he’s a asshole dom

smoking with tsukishima was a blessing. You’d sit in the warm sun, passing back a blunt between you, talking and laughing through shallow coughs. Your favorite part was the aftermath. You’re both lazy and slightly high with no plans for the day. You’d both lay in bed spooning with a warm buzz on your body, ready to take a nap. Life was perfect in this moment.

You find something easy to watch on your TV, sound low and quiet, mixing with Tsukishimas breaths behind your ear.

You could tell your boyfriend wasn’t quite ready to fall asleep though. You could feel him grip your hips just a tad tighter and his hips lightly pushing against your backside, matching the speed of the feathery kisses Tsukki placed on the back of your neck and jaw.

Usually, you’d be able to hold yourself together and show some restraint, but you can’t help but clench your thighs, scooting forward slightly to escape the smal grinds.

“tsukki stop, m’tryna watch”

“fine, then watch”

You’d tried your best to continue watching and pay attention to whatever was currently playing but you were always distracted but a smooth deep thrust from Tsukki. You could feel his dick growing with every thrust, getting heavier and heavier on your ass and mind. Tsukki may be an asshole, but he certainly made up for it when y’all were pressed skin to skin. You can’t recall a single time your boyfriend let you leave his bedroom without shaky legs, he was just so good at using his dick. It didnt help that he was naturally blessed with a long cock, a slight curve that scraped out your insides every other night. It was so pretty you couldn’t help but think about it. all. the. time.

The jerk in your boyfriend took control and you heard him curse before hooking his thumbs into your pants and underwear, yanking them down as quickly as possible. You whine at the cool air now able to reach your most sensitive areas. You were still debating whether or not you wanted to beg Tsukkis forgiveness and have him fuck you, or let him wear himself out until you both fall asleep. You didn’t dare look back as you heard him push his sweats down his gorgeous thighs. You braced yourself for him to enter your cunt as you heard him spit into his hand and pump himself while he stared down at you. But as you feel him guiding his cock along your pussy, he slides over your clenching entrance and settles for the warmth of your squished and now slightly slick thighs.

Tsukishima wasted no time in setting a quick pace, with a thigh grip on your hip, he treated your soft thighs like his personal fleshlight. The more he thrusted, the more dampness collected between the two of you, so much so you could hear his dick being sucked into your thighs. You bit your lip to keep from whining when you felt his tip nudge your clit. Then it happened again, and again and repeatedly until all you could think about was Kei shoving your face into the mattress and rocking your world.

“want you daddy, please” you’d cry out, not being able to focus on the TV in front of you. You now fully focused on the fingers digging into your hips and the puffs of air leaving his mouth. Then you heard a low growl come from behind you.

“oh now you want me? you were just so focused on your little video. I’m taking care of myself since you didn’t wanna be a good obedient slut, so while i’m fucking your messy thighs you can sit and whine like a bitch in heat”

Kei always knew exactly what to say to get you whimpering and squirming on top of him, it was a special talent of his. Not only could his words turn you on beyond comprehension, they tuned you into exactly what he wanted you to be, his dirty slut. Your next words tumble out of your mouth before you can stop them.

“Please daddy, need you to fuck me. I can feel your cock rubbing against me. please please daddy, you always fuck me so good, fuck me so deep every time daddy, wanna be your good slut, wanna make you cum” you’d cry out, pushing back against him and arching your back

Tsukki grips your jaw and twists your head to look at him, “do you even hear the slutty words coming out of your filthy mouth huh? begging for my cock like a desperate slut? you’re fucking addicted to this cock aren’t you?” he slams into you in one go, making you grip onto his arm. “pathetic, you’re so fucking needy for daddys cock in your cunt, you’re dripping”

He immediately sets a rough pace, his long fingers digging into your hips and jaw. He’s got you pulled against his chest real close and you can barely hear your own moans over Keis groans and your skin slapping and pussy squelching. It’s beautifully nasty and it’s making you lose your mind. You mentally searching for an anchor to ground yourself in the realm of existence the duck is just THAT good.

You turn your head mouth open and looking for the finger on your cheek, sucking on his middle finger to muffle your screams. It nearly send Tsukki over the edge and he roars lowly in your ear.

“What? My cock not enough slut? Need daddy to fill your other holes?” He laughs mockingly, shoving two fingers down your throat. He kisses your temple as you choke and gargle around his long slender fingers, his knuckles are pressing against the top of your throat and his finger tips are nearly down your trachea.

“...frease yathy...” you gargle around tsukkis fingers, you’re not even sure you fully understand what you’re saying.

“what’s that baby? speak up? cant understand you when you babble” He pulls his fingers out until nothing but the finger tips remains on your lips, spit hanging in strings around your mouth and drool byline at the corners.

“please daddy, feels so good, wanna cum” you all but sobbed

“my little slut wants to cum? alright baby, hold on” Tsukki growls, he wrapped his left arm around your torso while his other hand pushed your head away from him as leverage, slamming into you as hard and fast as he possibly can. You’re screaming and cumming and crying and shaking and it’s all so much but it’s soooo good and you think for a moment you’ll be able to catch your breathe as his thrusts slow down and he pulls out of you.

Then you’re being flipped on your back and tsukishimas dick is being slammed back into you at an angle, automatically hitting that spot that rips a screech from your throat and causing your village to blur.

“look at my baby, fucked so stupid she can’t even stop crying” Tsukki coos, licking at your tears and kissing the apple of your cheeks.

“Love you daddy” You whine in a voice that has tsukki sitting up, dragging your hips into his lap.

“awe is daddy’s cock all you can think about sweetheart? my dumb little slut, taking me so well like the fuck toy you are”

“Yea daddy, i’m your good fuck toy.” You babble drunkenly. Tsukishima absolutely Loved you like this, pretty eyes red and slightly puffy, you’re shedding tears but smiling. you’re so cock drunk you’d agree with nearly anything he said as long as he was the one saying it. Your body mostly limp except for the small shivers that run through.

“Yea baby? What else? Tell daddy how you like to be treated slut,” He pops a quick slap on your bouncing chest, causing you to jump. He wanted to see how far your take this.

“daddy’s cocksleeve, so deep, daddy’s good little slut....good slut....” You recount all your favorite insults your boyfriend spews at you while your fucking. Tsukki has never been quiet during sex, nearly as long as y’all have been having sex, he’s been spewing dirty insults at you.

At your confession, Tsukki fucks into you harder and faster, causing you to tense up. His tip is slamming into your cervix and you feel like your being split in half.

“S’too deep, too much daddy” you whine, hips bucking to gain some relief.

“It’s too much? Do you think I fucking care? You said it yourself baby, you’re my cocksleeve so i’m gonna fuck you until i’m done, i don’t care how many times you gush and cream around me, i’m gonna fuck you unconscious if i wanna.”

“Yes daddy, please” Tsukki doesn’t think you even know what he just said, but he smiles and grips your throat anyway.

“You didn’t lie did you slut? You said you were my good fuck toy, you know how I feel about lying sluts?” A growl tore through his chest as he continued fucking into your body.

“No daddy, i’m a good slut, your fuck toy. want your cum daddy” You cry. Tsukki loosens the grip on your throat to listen to your fucked out babbles.

He nearly loses his mind as he watches your much smaller hand move around until it grabs his own from your hip, licking his lips as you drag it to your lower belly, pushing his palm down.

“Want you to cum here daddy, can feel you” You look into tsukkis eyes and he nearly whines himself at the slutty yet happy look in your eyes. He pushed down more, feeling the tip of cock press against his own hand, groaning he shoved into you one last time, spilling his seed as deep into your body as he can,

“feel me in your tummy baby? good fucking girl, milking me dry. you want my babies don’t ya sweet girl?” Tsukki ruts into you to make sure you’ve got every last drop. He may be a mean dom but he’s always so sweet to you when he’s cumming, something about his orgasm makes him spread praise like it’s his job.

His orgasam suck one from you, causing you to squirt all over your boyfriends covered torso.

“look at this mess slut, it’s okay. I’ll clean it up this time, next time you’re getting punished” Tsukki speaks plainly, plopping a kiss in your forehead as he pulls out, heading to the bathroom to get some things to clean you with.

[tomdiddlyumptious]

T.H| Just Hurry up Please

summary: honestly coochie be bangin

warnings: shaving? A very talkative thomas and a pregnant women

a/n: i just read back in my messages and i swear these people lift me up so much, i love all of you who keep giving me complements and etc, i love all of you honestly.

“THOMASSS!” you yelled from the room, currently seven weeks pregnant and craving fruit snacks and mini Oreo packs, it made him confused and ask why the mini packs if they all taste the same, they simply do not. 

“yes darling!” he got up and walked to the room, you sighed and lifted yourself up to the headboard before speaking. “i need you to do me a huge favor” 

“if you want me to get you food it isnt a favor” he gently laughed before leaning against the door with his arms crossed. “no i need you to shave me” you simply said and his face dropped. “as innnnnnnn?” he took his hand and pointed south, “if you dont wanna do it you dont have to!-”

“nonononnono wheres the razor” he asked, quickly walking into the bathroom and looking on the counters and in the shower “its uhhhhh-” you snapped your fingers three times “its in the drawer nearest to the right wall!” you said and he nodded, walking to the wall and opening the drawer. “no these are where the towels are!- wait nevermind i went to the wrong wall” he rolled his eyes at his stupidity and went to the other wall, bending down and opening the drawer revealing all of your feminine products but he only grabbed the pack and opened it. taking one out and exiting the bathroom and coming back to you.

“i havent shaved in three months tom, its gonna get complicated down there” you warned him and only chuckled “oh im sure i know everything about heavens” “did you just call my vagina heavens?” “yeah?” you cringed at him before telling him to grab a towel, non scented soap, a squirt bottle and a plastic cup of water, plus a pair of scissors and a little small toothed comb.

“im not giving surgery, right?” he asked, looking at the small table that he set everything on. “you- shut up” you pointed at him before laying down. your pants are off and the two towels, your sitting on them. tom pushed the blankets to his side of the bed so the main focus is you. “alright, get in position”

“position?” tom asked, looking away confused. “As if your, gonna, ya know!” “ohhhhh” he separated your legs and laid on the bed, eye level with your clothed hood. 

“are you ready?” “yes y/n” “pull them off” tom hasnt looked their in what felt like years. so he was excited and eager to pull them off, but when he did his face stood in shock “thomas, stop. your pissing me off” “sorry i didnt expect id be in the jungle” he spaced off, looking up at you as you gave...that look. 

“whats the next step please!” “take the comb and the scissors please” you said, watching as he nodded and reached his arm over and grabbed the items. “you are going to give me a trim, okay?” his jaw dropped at your words “a...trim?”.

you sighed as you let your head rest on the pillow “i swear im not having sex with him ever again” you whispered “WAIT WHAT??? NONONONONONO IM GIVING YOU A TRIM” he quickly got to work, combing through the hairs before cutting them neatly, his tongue poking out the side of his lips as he tried all of the different ways. “Stop playin!” you yelled and he glared at you “your gonna make me stab you on accident!” “mhmm, accident you say?” he rolled his eyes and chuckled before cut more.

“so how do i clean this up?” “did you get the inside?” his eyes widened. “You grow hair inside-” “no tom we dont, move the lips” you ordered, looking as he moved your lip to the side “this is so strange” he muttered to himself, “be careful, i swear if you hurt me-” “i wont!” he took his other hand and replaced his current one pushing the lip away and took the scissors to carefully cut the hairs before repeating on the other side. 

“take the soap and use the water to lather it up” you said and he followed, he lathered it up before placing it down. “okay now spread it on there” “like in between?” “no no, just above it” he placed the soap on the skin, the soft hairs against his hand as he rubbed it in, small circles all over. “open them more please” he said, and you followed. he got your bikini line “now the razor” 

he picked it up “im scared y/n” “your doing good tom, just do swipes, go up then down, then to the side” “alright, i think i got that” he sighed, “and pull my stomach up!” “what?” “push the skin up” you took his free and used it to push up your stomach skin. “like that, okay?” “alright” he groaned before swiping gently up, he did it but avoided one place.

“god damn” he talked to his self, using the squirt bottle to rinse away the hair. “i feel like i should get an award, how ling have we been here for?” “about an hour” “AN HOUR? y/n im not ever doin this again, i can barely see” “keep talking shit” “shit atleast im being honest babe, i feel like i just gained 300 worth of muscle trying to shave this thing” “alright imma fuck you up” “im just sayin” he shrugged, dramatically wiping his forehead while you just starred at him. 

“im telling my kids they father was a very lazy man” “i get up like 78 times a day just to get YOU food, whos lazy?” he said, biting his tongue as he got the bikini line. “exactly, so be quiet before i bite it” “bite what?” your eyebrows furrowed. “oh you know exactly what im talking about, now let me focus”

when he was done he helped you in the shower, rinsing off all the hair he  couldnt get and you looked in the mirror “really? a land strip?” you said, both starring at the line of hair. “yeah i thought we could get matching ones” he shrugged. “you want me to do yours?” you asked looking at him and he nodded. “it shouldnt take an hour....right?” “uhmmmm no” 

“AHHH” he screamed. “WHAT THE FUCK?” you giggled at his yelling. “sorry! but we gotta get this done!” “why the wax? why not the fucking razor?” he yelled in lowercase, you only shrugged before pulling the other side some and he screamed at the top of his lungs. “NO STOP IM NOT DOING IT ANYMORE” he pushed your hand away “tom its the last one...pleaseeee!” you begged, looking at the strip. “i gain all sex privileges back then, deal?” you dramatically thought about it before he smacked his lips and slapped your hand away “ALRIGHT ALRIGHT-” you quickly pulled the paper off and he screamed again. “OHHHH MY FUCKINGGGG GODDD Y/N” he starred at you while you tried to hold in your laughs. “it looks pretty” you choked out before you broke out laughing him still starring at you. “i have to put on some oil first!” picking up the tea tree oil and rubbing it on your finger tips before putting it on him, a sigh of relief leaving his lips as he tilted his head back.

“see! all happy a good now arent cha?” you giggled. “im never doing that again, y/n” “lets go look!” you took his hand and pulled him back into the bathroom, you both stood in silence as you tried posing, his area still slightly red as his penis was just in the air, sitting there. “yeah never again, period” “since when do you say period, thomas?” “since you waxed off my skin” “it was your idea!” “and i regret every minute of it, its only gonna grow back” you glared at him as he gave you a blank stare. “just put on your clothes” “exactly what i was about to say!” 

[nctzanne]

Your Last Name

♡ doctor!mark x fem!Reader.♡ smut, fluff if you use glasses

WARNINGS!: use of alcohol and drugs, explicit content, not sex but mentions of it.

𝑆𝑢𝑚𝑚𝑎𝑟𝑦: I just want you to give it a try and read it AAAH

𝑅𝑒𝑞𝑢𝑒𝑠𝑡?: no, an idea i've had since i started stanning NCT

𝐴𝑛𝑛𝑒'𝑠 𝑡𝘩𝑜𝑢𝑔𝘩𝑡𝑠 & 𝑟𝑒𝑐𝑜𝑚𝑚𝑒𝑛𝑑𝑎𝑡𝑖𝑜𝑛𝑠: As i said above, this is an idea I've had for sOOOOOO many months, so I really wanted it to make it happen. It was on my drafts for a long time. Thank you so so much if you take the time to read this.

You noticed when your mind woke up suddenly, but without opening your eyes, slowly bringing you back to reality. You tasted your own mouth dry as a bone, with a metalic flavor on it, typical scenario when we talk about hangovers. The headache that invaded you so suddenly made you grab your forehead, almost if you brain was going to explode right there. The smell of fermentation on the room -or wherever you were- made you nauseous, so you stayed still to avoid vomiting everything you consumed the night before. A light breathing woke you up from your trance and inner speech, you could even feel the warmth of it on your shoulder. That's when you realize you were not alone, totally opposite of that, you were cornered by arms twice your size, avoiding you to move on the super duper comfortable position you were in. You still didn't want to open your eyes to notice who the lucky guy was, but you could smell the hints of tequila on his breath. When that hit your nose, you turned around abruptly by instinct, trying to avoid the smell. You opened my eyes a little, just to be able to locate yourself in space-time.

A room hotel, there's where you were. White walls reflected the light that came from outside of the giant windows, making you cover your eyes with the hand that wasn't under the grip of this unknown guy. Once your eyes get used to the light, you remembered that you were at Bora-Bora for vacations with your best friend. You can hear the eagles screaming way too loud for your irritable state, but just noticing where you were made you feel more calmed. "At least I'm here and they didn't kidnap me" You thought, finally grabbing the courage to turn around and see who exactly was the guy that had a night of passion with you.

"Sure, shit"

╚═══════ ≪ °❈° ≫ ═══════╝

-Wait, repeat it to me, who did you meet? -You asked incredulously, looking at how your friend Rosé was overflowing with emotion and nervousness.

-Do you know this famous band?- She told you a name that you couldn't identify, you automatically shake your head-Anyways, while I was waiting for you on the beach I met with Jaehyun, the bass player, we talked a little and he invited us for a few drinks with his friends!- She talked so fast that you had a hard time processing all the information that was given to you.

-And that's it, a random guy talks to you and you say yes?. He could be a serial killer-

-Ah c'moooon, he's a superstar, it will be funn!!!-

So, a not so official date with guys from a band. Sure, excellent idea.

-Okay, are they handsome at least?- You asked with disinterest

-You can't imagine, y/n, so prepare yourself as well as possible, they will fall for you- she approached the small bridge that united your cabins in the middle of the sea, while she blowed you a flirtatious kiss.

You just laughed and walked towards the windows, admiring the sea. You were literally in paradise, your bedrooms floated above the ocean, the white sand was not so far from where you were staying in, and the horizon was clearer than ever. How lucky you were to have a friend who helped you get over your breakups with a very casual trip to Bora Bora at the Four Seasons hotel. Loneliness invaded you for a second and you decided to get ready for the long-awaited meeting that you would have with her friends.

╚═══════ ≪ °❈° ≫ ═══════╝

A white beach dress with pink heels and your tan is enough, with the right makeup obviously. It was already 7 pm and your nervous friend looked at her cell phone while texting with someone

-Is it him?- You ask, trying to peek behind her shoulder to see if you could figure out what they're talking about.

-Yes, he is telling me he's here at the bar but he doesn't see us-

-Of course, we are sitting, let me raise my hand- and so you did it.

-Here!!!!- Your friend screams in excitement when she sees 3 tall figures approaching to you. They seemed to walk on a slow pace, almost like the came out of a movie. And yes, your heart almost stopped for a good 10 seconds. Three guys, my gosh, models? What were they again?. God definitely had preferences for some human beings.

The fact that they aere so handsome and well… structured made you blush. Jaehyun, Johnny and ...

-Mark, nice to meet you- the youngest of the 3 of them greeted me, with a dazzling smile that makes his dimples appear. You bit your lip and studied his entire face so that you would never forget him again. -y/n, nice to meet you too-

╚═══════ ≪ °❈° ≫ ═══════╝

Nothing more and nothing less than Mark Lee himself. His makeup was completely smeared, traces of mascara under his closed eyes. His forehead and nose were reflecting the daylight a bit. It was a hot morning (or evening), and having you next to his body was obviously going to make him sweat. His open, broken lips gave off that smell of alcohol that made you sick. But despite of everything, your sight softened after a couple of seconds. He was sleeping so peacefully, and he was clinging to you like his life depended on it, so you couldn't help but smile.

-Mark... wake up- you whispered softly while you tried to get up.

-Hmmmh, what time is it?- his morning voice made my stomach tingle a bit, your sight never leaving his figure while he starts waking up.

He squinted while he sit up in bed slowly, ruffling his own hair. It was obvious that he was in the same blank state you were a few minutes ago, and you could tell by how he confusingly looked around at the room, until his eyes reached at you. His face expression softened, giving you a shy smile.

-Do you need some clothes?- he asked, blushing when he studied your naked torso with lazy eyes. You realized that you both were entirely naked, and you rushed to cover your breasts with your arms, just to earn a pure laugh from him, that made your head resonate in pain.

-We fucked, y/n, no need to hide- Mark put all his weight on his left elbow, getting closer to you while tilting his face flirtatiously. That made you cheeks go red as ever.

-Yes, but I don't remember anything so your point is automatically invalid- His body hovered yours so fast that you couldn't even process what was happening, until he pecked your lips.

-I remember everything, so I will refresh your memory-

You burst out laughing while he deposited soft pecks all over your face. The situation was so sweet, but it didn't make you feel uncomfortable at all. He interrumpted his love actions and looked at you hungrily.

-Mark, I barely can keep myself awake, i feel like I'm going to puke...-You warned him, reading his intentions.

-Okay okay- he looked down defeated- At least, can we cuddle a bit more? I promise I can make the hangover feel better- He tangled his legs and arms to your body, resting his face on your collarbones.

╚═══════ ≪ °❈° ≫ ═══════╝

Everything on that evening was talking about the mortality of a crab. Basics like where you were from, what do you do for a living and relationship status open the conversation.

Your attention was drawn to Mark when he started to introduce himself. As a Medicine student, he decided with his 2 best friends that were part of a band to go on a trip to relax due to the busy schedules that consumes their time. The three live together on a small apartment in Korea, where the rent is expensive so they can make it more affordable.

Bora-bora was the destination of their choice. It seems that the band called NCT 127 draw lot of attention from crazy fans who followed them EVERYWHERE, so an expensive place like so would be easier to have a time for them on their own.

Mark spoke always adding "like" between his words, he liked to lay back when he was sipping on his piña colada, but got closer to the table when you talked about your experience as a journalist.

He tried so hard to show interest on a topic he had no idea about, that his questions were kinda clueless, but it was obvious that it was his way to not cut the attraction and chat between you and him. It was a sexual tension you could feel by kilometers, every gaze you had was followed by a shy smile, and you felt tingles on your body everytime you had a bit of interaction.

-Do you guys do shots?- Rosé interrumpted the conversation, scanning the boys reaction.

-I mean, that's why we are here- Johnny combed his hair backwards, already feeling heated by the 2 gin tonics he drank in 15 minutes. I couldn't deny, him on a tight black shirt looked hot as fuck, I could notice how Rosé was drooling for him- Excuse me, maa'am- he raised his hand, calling the waitress- 3 rounds of shots please!-

-Man, we had 2 yesterday and you almost puked on the sea, go easyyyy- you could notice the tipsy state from Jaehyun as well. His eyes were almost closed on a thin line and his dorky smile betrayed him. Mark laughed out loud, first time in the night you heard him like that, with his cheeks tinted red. He took a big sip of his piña colada, looking at you directly at the eyes. Actually, you didnt noticed till that moment, but your legs started to feel a bit numb. Quite usual for you when the alcohol gets up on your head.

-I'm in!- you answer to Johnny's idea. Once the blue shots arrive, you quickly grab one.

-Cheers for this night to be special- he screams with a deep voice, and the other 2 guys howl as response while you burst out laughing.

When you decided that the amount of alcohol on your body was enough, you took a chance to go to the beach to sing and dance to the DJ placed randomly in there.

You felt bliss, the EDM music was filling your senses, but you tried to keep your eyes full opened so you could remember the beautiful but blurry view of the sunset.

Together with your new group of friends were a mess. Jumping, screaming, raising your hands like you could touch the sky, everything seemed possible at that moment. Even dancing and getting laid with Mark.

The music had nothing to do with your plan, but you got dangerously close to him, resting your arms on his shoulders. You could see that he chuckled, tilting his head back so he could see you fully. Both of you were drunk as hell, you thought you were killing it with the flirting skills, but probably you just looked like two fools trying not to fall for the obvious drunken state you were.

-Do you wanna kiss me?- you screamed while "Jenny" sounded on the speakers. What kind of question is that?

-Sure I do- his canadian accent made you bite your lip while smiling- Can I?- his voice tried to mimic yours, but you didnt answered, it wasnt necessary.

Your lips collided as you got close at the same time, and Mark wasted no time to open his mouth and let his tongue in your wet cavity. You moaned so loud, because you knew no one could hear it but him. A fierce fight between both of your tongues started, every graze of them would make yourself wetter and wetter. He squeezed your waist and tried to keep you closer to him if it was possible, in his drunk mind he was scared you could run away from him.

Nothing about the context was romantic at all. You both physically liked eachother and just wanted to make out. No love at first sight, no kiss with fireworks behind, just pure desire.

Adrenaline rushed your body when his hands cupped your ass, that was only covered by the thin dress you decided to wear. Nobody near you could care less about what you two were doing it, but for you, everyone was looking at the show you and Mark were offering, and that obviously turned you on.

You bit Mark's lower lip, sucked on it, while opening your eyes to look directly at him. Eyes closed, he was enjoying how you toyed his lips. The hard grip on your skin, and a bulge poking your stomach made you feel powerful, you were loving the effect you caused on him.

Suddenly, an arm made you break your kiss with Mark. You lose your balance so you hug the guy that was pulling you backwards. Johnny.

-Hey, pornstars, we have some nice shit here- he pointed his hand with his eyes. You could see a tiny bag with a white dust inside. You come to your senses and look around at the crowd to try find Rosé, but it was obvious she already was under the influence. She was on Jaehyun's shoulders, enjoying the music. You sigh, chuckling at the sight of her losing her mind.

-Its my first time though- you commented while you look at Johnny spreading the dust on top of his phone screen with one hand using a credit card. You could notice he was an expert at it, you peek to see Mark right by your side looking at the manouvers as hypnotized as you. Probably it was his first time too.

You both snorted the little substance, and it sucked at first. It was so uncomfortable, but it took minutes for you to get used to that weird sensation on your nose.

You didnt even noticed when everything started to amplify. You could feel the summer breeze making its way around you, the taste of Mark's saliva still on your tongue was strong, the colorful tins of the sky while it was dusking looked so enhanced.

A hand grabbed yours, taking you out of your trance, and almost felt like an orgasm. So warm and so soft, made you wanna scream. You turned to see a fucked out Mark, studying your face with dilated pupils, he was almost as horny as you by only grabbing hands.

He caressed yours with his thumb, and it felt like he was fucking you, your body shivered at it. Mark was enjoying it too, so he brought your fingers closer to his mouth and inserted the index one inside, and started to suck on it. You moaned and felt how your pussy clenched at nothing, the saliva coating your finger felt like caramel, if you could explain the feeling.

-Mark if you keep doing that i'm gonna cum- you told him with a warning tone, he was so inmersed on sucking your finger that he jumped when you talked. He was aroused by the situation too.

He smiled with your finger still inside of his mouth, took it out, holded you by your wrist and started to run towards...

╚═══════ ≪ °❈° ≫ ═══════╝

-And we ended up here- Mark sumed up the night while you were laying on his chest, caressing it with the tip on your fingers. His, on the other hand, were playing with the locks of your hair.

-Yeah, i remember now, such a night- and then you snapped- Wait... where the fuck is...-

-Yeah, she was having a threesome with the boys. Dont worry, she was having a good time-Mark answered with a playful tone. Of course, that sounds like a very Rosé thing to do. You let out a breathy laugh.

-We could have joined...- you suggested, looking up at him. He took a few seconds to answer, while his eyes moved from one corner to the other of the ceiling, like he was evaluating that scenario.

-Yeah, and sharing? No thanks- he bit his lip and he looked at you with a greedy smile- I felt so lucky to have you screaming my name over and over-

You hit his shoulder with your fist playfully, and he took that as an answer to keep silent and just enjoy the company of the other.

╚═══════ ≪ °❈° ≫ ═══════╝

2 days went by, you get used to hang out with the boys. All kinds of crazy stuff you could imagine, you were doing it with them, and it felt like heaven. Mark couldnt keep his hands to himself and everytime he had the opportunity, he would make you cum on his fingers or mouth. And the same goes for you, too. Thanks to him, you noticed how good you are at giving blowjobs inside public restrooms.

But nothing lasts forever, sadly, and the last day of your summer vacation arrived. Rosé and you were ready to go back to Seoul, while they would be staying a little bit longer. It hurted, you got used to Mark's attention, and either him or you wanted to ask for eachothers contact. Not because of lack of interest, but because both of you thought that the other saw it as an adventure. You didn't even knew his last name.

His lips devours yours before you could get in the car that was waiting for you on the street -I wont forget you, thanks for this amazing 3 days- he smiled, a tint of sadness on his eyes. You caressed his cheek, pecking his nose, trying to hurry as much as you coulf so you wouldnt start to feel emotional.

-Y/l/n-

He looked at you clueless -What?-

-My last name is y/l/n- you smiled and without waiting for an answer, you close the door of the car.

╚═══════ ≪ °❈° ≫ ═══════╝

-Hey, hey, it's okay- typical of Rosé being so overdramatic. Sure, your finger almost got cut in half while you were trying to cook some carbonara, but it wasnt a big deal, something a few stitches couldn't fix. The only thing that kept your finger from gushing blood out was a piece of toilet paper.

-Please! My friend needs a doctor!!!!- She screamed at the top of her lungs inside the hospital.

-What happened?- a nurse hurried, worried eyes scanning you both.

-She is losing her finger!!!!- Rosé felt she was going to faint.

-Jesus, Rosé, calm down-

The nurse takes a quick look at your finger- Yeah it doesn't look that good, please follow me. You are lucky we don't have that many patients on New Years Eve-

You are guided to a tiny room full of medical stuff, probably where you are going to get your finger sticked together. It hurted as fuck, but you were trying to keep focused on something other than the pain. You looked at the desk with the computer on, and on a hidden corner you noticed a picture of 3 friends, on a place that seemed too familiar to you. Actually, the friends also seemed like an old ones you had... maybe in university? You can't quite remember.

The door opened up while you were trying to dig into your memories , and you looked at the door startled.

-So, Mrs y/n...- that voice, that motherfucking voice. A year has passed. But how the fuck you were supposed to forget it?. You felt your ears buzzing, face heating and heartbeat racing. You were losing your breath and suddenly the pain of your finger got worst and worst.

He didn't turn to look at you, just got inside by looking at his phone, and once he was sit in front of you, his facial expression dropped.

There were the both of you, looking at eachother like dumb teenagers, like your finger wasnt bleeding out, almost like you were backat that bar in Bora-bora again.

-I... uh... yeah, my finger- you stutter, pointing at it. Mark shakes his head, coming back at his professional senses.

Before the medical procedure he performed, he bandaged your finger, and wrote some medicine you had to take for the pain to go away.

-It should be okay on a few weeks, nothing to worry about- he smiled at you, trying to comfort you. You felt your heart drop when he grabbed the healthy of both of your hands and caressed your palm with his thumb, everything felt like a flashback. You looked at him with clueless eyes.

-I... uh... I should come back in a few weeks then- you stuttered, pressing your lips into a thin line while looking at him directly on his eyes. He nods.

-Lee-

You frowned -Huh?-

-My last name is Lee-

[telaraneas]

(i change my mind, copypasting this to its own post cause it really got away from me. long post warning)

i guess what im thinkin is like, that light is the domain of “things that MUST happen, for Reasons”; mind is the domain of “things must/will happen, for REASONS”; void is the domain of, like, “things happen or don’t happen for no discernible reason, necessarily”.

thats not really a great description of it i guess but, for instance, a good example is that one time Rosesprite happened…. For No Reason. and for no reason, really i mean no narrative reason- it ended up setting off a chain of events that resolved the subplots of many minor characters, so it’s not like it’s USELESS, but there was kind of no way to predict that whole thing from a “narratively this is something that we are leading up to” standpoint, which is why roxy’s actions brought it about on accident, and why rose was so thoroughly perplexed by it the whole way through. void is probably closer to the way things happen in real life, but it is sort of the anthitesis to the way things happen in stories, where everything is deliberate and happens for A Narrative Reason… but homestuck was always largely written on the fly at least in the smaller scale things, so this sort of thing just Happens lol

incidentally im pretty sure a mind player like terezi could have technically predicted that, if she had for any reason at all been previously informed of all the moving parts of that whole thing and TRYING to predict what the fuck jaspersprite was gonna do, because it IS perfectly logical in hindsight, but like… that’s the whole thing, why the fuck WOULD you be trying to look into that or predict it????? there was seemingly no narrative reason for any of that to be relevant! and that’s kind of what void is about i think!

on a similar note i thing breath is more along the lines of just…. Things Happen. similarly to void, it’s not about trying to discern WHAT will happen or WHY, but unlike void, the things that DO happen under the influence of breath ARE kind of things that the narrative called for. breath seems to be kind of the aspect dominating narrative contrivance

people often confuse contrivance with plot holes, but from what i understand they’re very different. a plot hole is when something happens, and it makes no sense for it to happen to the degree it breaks with previously established known facts, and it’s just never explained.

a plot contrivance doesn’t really contradict anything, necessarily, it’s just… like… there’s no reason for it to NOT happen the way it does, but there’s also no reason for it TO happen the way it does, and overall the reason it’s considered bad writing is because it tends to come across as lazy. oh, the heroes JUST SO HAPPENED to find the one magic sword that can defeat the bad guy, just laying on the side of the road. how convenient!

…incidentally, john’s entire story arc seems to be built entirely around moments like these skfnkenfke

i think it was smart writing to codify this as 1. the influence of an actual cosmic force that DOES operate on those principles, and 2. make john have to figure out how to get a handle on things by himself, even if the tools and circumstances just happened to be aligned in his favor by everything else in the story. john still has to be the one to turn HIMSELF into a deus ex machina, on-screen, to fix everything. it gives the story a good narrative and emotionally resonant reason to just contrive the hell out of everything john does and goes through, while STILL delivering on his arc as a hero’s journey

(i also think it’s really funny that the ring, which gets LITERALLY deus ex machina’d into the story via the author himself, is CONVENIENTLY found by tavros, and john CONVENIENTLY ends up with it in the story itself sjfnskdn true breath shenanigans, and incredibly fitting that vriska rejected it and played no part in it because there was no previously known indication that the ring would be important in any way until the two breath players started playing hot potato with it)

i’m still not sure if i have a good grasp on what exactly time does, because we have seen very different attitudes taken towards it by various different players AND the official description, and it’s hard to tell what, in each regard, comes from time as an aspect, from the classes of the characters, or from the characters themselves/both things; but for now i think my best guess is that time is kind of “things already happened, this is inmutable, let’s just cut to the chase”, more or less. like, the way this differs from light is that light still thinks of things more or less linearly, even when they UNDERSTAND this is not the case, whereas time tends to just not even concieve of things has “something that is happening”

like, example, vriska vs aradia; they both kind of enabled Big Bad Things that they already knew would happen via timeline shenanigans- but from what i recall, i don’t think aradia ever PERSONALLY set any of those events in motion, she simply didn’t correct any misunderstandings and thus allowed the wheels of time to turn smoothly; whereas vriska went “bec noir Will Happen = someone will make it happen anyways = i’m gonna make it happen myself, cause someone has to, and it might as well be me!!!” because of her compulsion to be the master of her own fate

aradia didnt so much see her actions as her *doing* anything, evil or good; she was pretty much just making sure things ended up where they were already going to end up/had already ended up, devoid of motivation or reason. similar to dave in the first five acts, just opening and closing loops Because He’s Gotta until he eventually runs out of steam and loops to close, because he really never had any motivations for doing what he was doing other than Well, I Already Did Them, So Obviously I Have To Do Them So I Can Have Already Done Them. no intent or motivation inherent to the actions themselves for half the story

a more childish example is caliborn getting fed up with the story and the Interpersonal Problems of the players and being like “fuck this, just skip to the good parts, they’re Going to happen so why do we have to sit through all of this shit!”. obv contrast to calliope, who seems to illustrate the kind of reader who would rather explore the status quo forever and imagine all the character interactions possible, playing in the *space* of the work in between the big status quo shifts and dreading said shifts, where caliborn wants to skip right past the status quo and have a story composed of nothing BUT the big shifts, the start and end of things

(neither of these are a sustainable way to tell a story, which is why you need at least a space and a time player)

[atlas-is-falling]

IM SO SICK AND TIRED OF THERE BEING NO CHARLOTTE X READERS ANYWHERE.

So heres my attempt. I haven't written in a good few years so excuse my everything.

--------------------------------------‐-------------

The damp rotting stench of gideon meat plant filled your lungs. 'Great' you thought. This place wasn't exactly fun, but at least it wasn't unfamiliar. The entity had ensnared another survivor and killer, forcing them into its twisted game, witch without a doubt meant that the killers home realm would become yet another killing ground soon.

You knelt at the end of a generator, sparking the wires between your fingers, the pistons slowly creaking to life. It had become almost second nature now, your muscle memory letting you look around whilst working.

A sharp scream off in the distance made you jump. It was meg. She must have been the first found. You steadied yourself waiting for the second scream, signaling she had been incapacitated and as expected it echoed the halls not long after.

Great. You thought. It's not myers or ghostface and it most likely isn't one of the chainsaw weilders. There was a faint nagging in the back of your skull that made you stop. What if it was the new one. The one you had no idea about. Hell, even Elodie didnt know anything about them and she came in with them. It was strange. Normally the killers have something in common with the survivor they're bought in with but no one could place it with Elodie and these Brutish twins.

Your generator roared to life the lights around you flickering on and the door to your left opened with a grinding rusted metal groan.

A sound caught you off guard. A quiet distant growling. It sounded like it was getting nearer. You ducked into a locker not far from the gen. Thank whatever gods there are that meg taught you how to silently jump into a locker.

The small creature rounded the corner almost instantly, almost crawling. It was the new killer. No. Killers.

You had yet to face them. David and jake were horrified after coming back to the campfire post trial with them. "How is it fair that they can be in 2 places at once." The entity didnt care for fairness and you all knew that deep down.

The small creature slowed snapping its gaze around the room. In an instant it jumped full force at the locker you were in gripping the handles with its little talons. It knew you were here. And if what jake said was true that means she wasn't far behind.

You struggled violently against the locker door. Finaly breaking through. Right. Up the stairs and down the pig silo. Try and loose them. Just as you grasped the hand rail the larger of the creatures turned the corner. You locked eyes with her. She wasn't much older than you. Scars adorned every inch of flesh you could see,her hair matted down by dirt and blood.

You made the vault without taking a hit and landed heavily at the bottom. You crept behind some blue waste tanks hoping she'd assume youd ran.

The loud clank of pans and a loud grunt of pain filled the room. There she was. The sound of 2 generators going off in the distance caught her atention. She gazed around the room one last time, her eyes faded clearly used to the dark, before leaving for the complete generators.

You stood rooted to the ground. She looked like shed been through hell, no doubt because of the little gremlin growing on her chest.

A scream and the sound of a gong, shook you from your thoughts. She might look like she needs a hug but right now shes trying to kill you and your friends. You edged your way through the meat plant, through the freezer, to the bathroom. The entity always placed a gen in there. It was like a sick challenge, 'do the gen in the most inescapable location and I'll reward you.'

A soft heartbeat rang out through your ears. She was coming. The soft screech of that small creature echoed off of the concrete walls from the other side of the building. The heartbeat rose in speed and volume she was coming and she was mad.

Locker. Again. Shed probably expect it but it's a little more safe than running straight to her. She trudged into the bathroom in a fit of rage. She hit the generator with her rusted bloody sickle, the gen sparking and crackling dead as she did so.

She turned slowly to the locker you were in. Eyes darting between the 3 red safe havens the entity so graciously placed in the room. She took a step forward scanning the grating on the front. Your eyes locking with hers yet again. That icy gaze making your body feel like stone.

She swung open the doors, her weapon landing in the splintering wood next to you. You stood unmoved, staring in awe at her frostbitten scarred face.

She seemed uncomfortable. Like she expected you to scream, flail or try to run.

A worn hand locked around your throat as she hurled you onto her shoulder.

You panicked the situation setting in. She walked carelessly to the basement next to the bathroom. The rusted metal hook sliding into the meat of your shoulder without any struggle. She stood back, looking you up and down.

You dont know where the confidence came from but you forced words from your throat.

"You.. have pretty- eyes.." you sputtered a small amount of blood dribbling from your mouth as you did.

She stood rigid, as if shed never received a compliment before. You could see the cogs in her head turning as she attempted to process your words. She settled for an appreciative grunt and a half smile as she dragged her feet out of the basement.

Everything went black for a few moments after that. The entities claws slowly descending to claim you. Yui must have snuck down because the next thing you knew she was angrily grumbling about you knowing better than hiding in a locker in bathroom and healing the deep hole in your shoulder. The last gen popped, the sound of meg being hooked rattling the plant, the entity claiming her. This wasn't over yet.

Yui suggested splitting up and heading to opposite sides of the building to get both doors that way at least one of them would get out.

You were halfway up the stairs before you saw her. It was the larger twin. She stood lifeless staring at the ground, hair falling gently over her face. Your curiosity must have gotten the best of you, legs moving on their own.

You stood beneath her. Hand mere centimetres from her face. This was crazy. You were deluded. But there you were, hand on the brutalised flesh of someone ordered to kill you.

Yui's screech shook the plant. The smaller one must have got her..

The slight rattle in the killers chest caught you off guard. She was looking at you. Those same frosted eyes as before, quizzical but not annoyed. She raised a hand to yours, the loud thudding in your chest back with a vengeance. She took it in her own motioning towards the door with her weapon. Yui must have tore the thing from her back the loud crack of the other door opening making you jump and the killer let out a harsh sigh.

"écume maléfique." She murmured.

Yui had gotten away.

She turned to you, the door now open. She tilted her head, didnt you realise she was letting you go? Leave before she changes her mind.

You smiled softly to her before turning away to leave. 'She seemed nice.' You thought, forgetting she had murdered meg and some other poor survivor you didnt even see.

The campfire came into view and you colapsed next to yui who was cheering to nea about how heroically she saved me and got out against those horrific twins.

It didnt sit right with you. She was around your age. Clearly just as emotionally ruined as some of the survivors who surrounded you. It felt wrong.

Yui's jab to your side broke your train of thought.

"And this lazy fuck was in a locker in bathroom." She announced, "I expect that crap from dwight, not you!"

You snorted. Smiling at her lighthearted insult.

"A bit quiet arent ya, (Y/N)?" Bill interrupted, "everything alright? Well. Aside from the usual."

You panicked, still processing the fact the killer let you go.

"Yeah.. it's just.. she was chasing me," you lied, "and then she let me go.. like, she let me open the door."

The campfire fell silent.

"That's odd.." felix added. The whole campfire quieting down to hone in on this conversation.

"Try not to think about it." Bill reassured you. "Chances are you wont see that monster again for a while."

You nodded, still unsure of your feelings. Sliding down off of the log and pulling your knees into your chest. The fire offered little warmth but it was welcomed. You gazed into the flames. It was calming.

Not quite as calming as those eyes, though.

[katsurolle]

HII i saw you rb my post about xinyan's lore with tags and i just couldn't not respond to that so i'm sending this ask 😭😭

after reading your response, i think i get it now 😭 perhaps her unbending will is just her. no doubt about it! so im retracting the statement about her "not having personality".

although, it would've been nice to know how she came to be that way too because xinyan's mirage wasn't much of a story (now idk if it was meant to be, but i'm assuming it was considering what they did with kazuha's).

but anyways, what i'm trying to say is that i'll definitely be thinking about this more 🥲 thanks for your kind and open-minded response.

- calyxcore

oh my gosh hi hi!!! first of all omg i hope my tags didnt come off as aggressive or argumentative i literally just have a habit of rambling in the tags wahaha!! i was just playing off what u said in ur post and just wanted to add my thoughts!! cos i dont usually make my own posts abt things and tend to hop in the tags of posts other ppl make to write out my own thoughts!! +shes my fave genshin chara waahaha so yea i just went n rambled!! (and im abt to ramble again im so sorry this reply is so long)

but yea!! i rly do appreciate ur yanyan questline critique bec the depth that we can see in the other characters. hyv writers simply refuse to give to her lol. and which is why the rest of the fandom still see her as boring or superficial etc etc. so 100% good on u for touching on that bec its true!!

her mirage didnt exactly have the same feel as kazuha's, where we were literally uncovering bits of his backstory bit by bit thru the mirage. every level of kazoo's mirage, we can see the kaedehara home deteriorate and break down bit by bit as we go further inside it. while yanyan's was just like. an abstract version of her daily life. w other extra elements like the flower, heat, and the music motifs.

am personally still on the fence whether the disparity between their mirages is simply a result of their differing personalities and history, or if its purely lazy writing for yanyan's lore!! remains to be seen until fischl's and mona's because. yanyan was able to get a handle of the stuff that went on in her mirage in some capacity, while kazoo's was a little less controlled? if that makes sense hehe.

cos the event treated the whole silhouette in screen doors/windows sequences differently between those two mirages. kazoo's felt more like a memory, while yanyan was able to interact w the other silhouettes that weren't her parents. imho its bec kazoo didn't rly get a chance to resolve these things w his family, giving that feeling of like. his past still haunting him n stuff. the burden that pushed him to be a wanderer in the first place. whereas yanyan literally has to fight these statements made against her every single day. so they don't rly make an impact in yanyan's mirage as much as kazoo's did, bec yanyan already knows the words and attitude down to. pacify them wahaha. literally where everyone else gets mad at their remarks but shes just like "lol let me handle this" and resolves the situation ez pz lemon squeezy. so depending on how fischl and mona will engage with their respective mirages, it might just be differences in personality n response to what is being shown in the mirages. considering that their mirages effectively portrayed their backstory n history (cos if not, then its def a writing problem haha)

but!! i do agree that this event would've been the perfect opportunity to show the exact moment she got the spark for rock and roll!! bec her character details dont rly elaborate where she found out abt rock and roll save for the fact that she immersed herself into teyvats world of music and experimented w different techniques (specifically her use of fire n pyrotechnics). so that would've definitely been nice to see represented in the mirage itself, or at the very least in the little 2d cutscene after the quest's main story. cos i was def shocked at how different yanyans cutscene was from that of kazuhas.

i'd default with the whole "oghhg fontaine lore not finished yet" but also: 1) writers could've sprinkled something. regardless if fontaine isnt out yet. they do it w/ fontaine npcs why couldn't they do it w a major event chara; 2) mona's mirage! if they show smth fontaine related im going to have a stroke bec they COULDVE done it for yanyan. but chose not to for some god forsaken raisin. and; 3) the extent of fontaine in yanyan's discovery of rock and roll isnt rly. known. its just that she immersed herself in diff music including rock and roll, and that rock and roll is from fontaine. so maybe fontaine isn't even involved. could've been some random person who was rockin and rollin and yanyan saw. meaning this circles back to the whole "this event could've touched more on her spark for rock and roll" thing too.

bottom line is. i do think that they did a good job w fleshing out yanyan's personality in this event, could 100% do more w exploring her backstory!! AND that ur original post was very good!! because everyone else is probably disregarding her quest anyway bec they're not as invested in her lol. so idk im happy to eat up any thoughts anyone has abt the quest because my god my baby girl deserves the spotlight so bad qwq

so yea!! thank u for sending this ask!!! i love when ppl send me asks telling me they read my tag rambles n want 2 discuss thoughts w me

[lovetenya]

𝐜𝐨𝐥𝐨𝐫 𝐬𝐞𝐫𝐢𝐞𝐬: 𝐲𝐞𝐥𝐥𝐨𝐰

pairing: tenya iida x gn! reader

warnings: angst. anxiety. paranoia. self doubt. unkind words. non-explicit mentions of physical pain & scarring. implied death, but i don’t elaborate. lying. worrying.

word count: about 1.8k

author’s note: nobody writes any iida angst, (barely anyone writes for him at all) and as a vehement lover of angst, i thought i’d fill that gap. i love tenya, i really do, but i love to think about him in this way just as much as i love to believe he’d be the perfect other half. nobody is perfect, not even ingenium.

loving tenya iida is yellow.

it’s the color of the petals on the soft yellow daisy bouquet that he surprised you with on the night of your first anniversary. although it wasn’t a last minute purchase (how could he forget the best day of his life?), he still wasn’t exactly sure what to get. 

what kind of object can symbolize a love so encapsulating?, he thought. there is no tangible item that could possibly show how i feel.

he picked up the familiar flowers from a shop on the corner that the two of you had walked past before on a date. it was one of the first ones, and you pressed your face against the glass to get a better look at the delicate flowers inside.

he caught himself in his romantics when he thought that none of them were prettier than you. nothing was or ever would be better than this moment, where you were on your tip toes in an attempt to see more flowers. that day, he insisted on buying you a small bouquet of yellow daisies, and thought it would be sweet to indulge and revisit the memory.

the week before your anniversary, he made you promise not to execute any elaborate celebratory plans.

“honey, you know that I’d rather do nothing with you than anything with anyone else,” he said. and he was serious. he would rather sit together on the couch half-listening to a documentary (because you can’t keep your eyes off each other) than go out to dinner, where he couldn’t let down his guard. 

although he liked to think that his work made the world a safer place, he couldn’t help but feel paranoid whenever you were out in public. how could he be sure that someone in the restaurant didn’t want him dead? how could he be sure that they wouldn’t kidnap and kill you just to make him suffer? if he couldn’t be sure, was it worth the risk?

he’s an iida, after all. with their striking looks and long hero legacy, it’s not exactly easy to blend in in a world whose wellbeing depends on your greatness and ability. there’s a great sense of pride in coming from a long lines of heroes, and his parents were much less than thrilled to receive the phone call that tenya was in the hospital following the incident that rendered his arm “useless”. they weren’t happy to see that he chose to leave his arm that way as a reminder of his dedication. 

when they figured he was out of earshot, they asked questions.

did the doctors check for any mental ailments?

will he ever be able to use his arm again?

why didn’t they amputate? 

what kind of hero accepts a physical wound and doesn’t try to heal?

what kind of hero goes after a villain on their own?

are you sure he’s cut out to be a hero? 

tenya isn’t proud of the publicity his family got following the incident including a certain self-proclaimed hero killer. he isn’t proud of the wary stares he gets from his classmates. he isn’t proud of the violence he’s been forced to commit. he isn’t proud of any of it, really, but he doesn’t regret his actions; not for a second, not even when he’s painstakingly rubbing scar balm into his shoulder, hoping that at least the scars would fade.

the pain, which seeped deep into his muscles and pricked at his bones, was more than just a cosmetic concern. he couldn’t care less about a scar, but with his limited movement capabilities, he knew he’d never be able to teach his sons to throw. the doctors didn’t have to tell him that. but, of course, they did. he knew what it all meant. he saw through their sugarcoating and attempts at softening the blow. they should’ve known better.

although he’s now your tenya, he was a hero first. 

before there was you, there was responsibility. before there was love and devotion, there were hero duties and combat instincts. they’re ingrained into his mind, refusing to be ignored. even when things seem fine, he can’t help but make sure. he couldn’t live with himself if his laziness were to cause someone else’s pain. that isn’t what heroes do. when you’re in public, he’s constantly scanning the room and won’t sit with his back to a door or window, because he needs to be able to see who’s coming and going. he has to make sure that everything is fine. he has to make sure everyone is safe, and everything is put-together. 

he has to be strong, because there are thousands of people counting on him. he has to be strong, because evil doesn’t rest. he has to be strong, because... if not him, then who?

--

the day of your anniversary, you texted tenya while he was at work.

you: i hope you have a great day, my love! i can’t wait until you get home so we can celebrate! <3!!

tenya: I can’t wait either! I love you very much, sweetheart. See you later.

--

he came home with his arms full of the bouquet of flowers, and almost teared up at the sight of the dinner you had set up for the two of you. you always considered every worry, every caution, every gut feeling of his, and he appreciated that more than he’d ever be able to express. no words did it justice. 

you’re more than his other half, you’re his everything. you’re everything he needs, everything he can’t be, and more.

you surprised him with an at-home dinner date, where it was perfectly safe and calm, and there were no people hiding in the shadows. music softly played in the background, and the daisies looked perfect on the table.

it’s okay, tenya, you reminded him. you’re home now. 

--

yellow is tenya’s birthday present, or the envelope holding it at least. 

there are only so many thoughtful gifts you can give before the inspiration simply runs out, and you have to go bigger. you have to look forward, and think of what will really leave a mark on someone’s life. you only have so many chances to get it right. 

one year, for his birthday, you got him the deed to a recently-discovered star and named it after him. a star for your star. your guide in the dark. your light in unimaginable darkness. your ever-present warmth.

--

many years later, when tenya is long gone, his star sparkles a little brighter.

through the telescope, he seems to be waving hello.

--

golden yellow is the promise ring that you have no idea how tenya afforded.

you insist he take it back and that neither of you are ready for the commitment, but he refuses, of course.he’s never been more ready for something in his life. he tells you,

“i got it for you because you’re worth it.

every day with you is worth it.

i never want to spent another day of my life without promising to love you every second of every day.

every time you wear this ring, you’ll be reminded of how much i love you.

i saved for months, anticipating this very moment when i’d get to promise myself to you forever. 

i promise, you deserve it.

you deserve everything, and i can’t wait to give it to you.” 

and you did deserve it. and you deserve him, in all of his glory. forever.

--

the harsh bruises littering his chiseled body are yellow at first. they turn purple, eventually, before they fade away completely. their sting, however, is more than just the pain of broken blood vessels. they’re a concrete reminder that tenya isn’t untouchable. he isn’t invincible. he’s human, and he bleeds red.

the bruises come when his instincts send him in the wrong direction, when he dodged too late, or when he couldn’t seem to land a kick. he tells you that they’re from when he “tripped going down the stairs” or when izuku “accidentally punched him too hard during a training session.” (lies.)

yellow is the embarrassment you feel when you confront izuku, pleading with him to be more careful with tenya, and he tells you that he couldn’t have possibly caused those bruises, because hasn’t seen iida outside of class in weeks. nobody has. he’s been training more than usual, and hasn’t been at group dinners.

yellow is the sickness and guilt you feel at the realization, because you recently teased iida for not getting his homework done. he smiled weakly, pretending like it was just a foolish slip-up. it was so unlike him, you couldn’t help but poke a little fun.

“ooooh!!! class representative iida tenya, professional stick in the mud, didnt complete his populations analysis essay on time??? somebody call the news outlets!!! or an ambulance, because i think i might die from shock!!!”

he couldn’t blame you for your ignorance, because he liked that you didn’t know. you didn’t know how tired he was. you didn’t know how hard he was pushing himself. you didn’t know how hard he was working. you didn’t know how close he was to breaking. nobody did, and he liked it that way. nobody wants to see their leader falter, or hesitate, or fail, so he didn’t let them.

while he didn’t like to make you wait, he especially didn’t like to make you worry, and he figured the best way to do that was to keep it all in. he was supposed to be an upstanding hero, worthy of admiration and inspiring greatness in all, but at the end of the day, your opinion of him mattered the most.

in his mind, he was supposed to be your hero. and he tried, with every fiber of his being, to be your everything.

he was supposed to keep you safe, not keep you up at night, wondering if this morning was the last time you’d get to kiss him goodbye. he’s supposed to come home to you, and he promised, even though he couldn’t be sure, that he would. he didn’t want to lie about that.

his lies are yellow. they’re made with hope of protecting you, with keeping you safe from the evil swirling through the world. 

what you don’t know can’t hurt you, right?

...right? 

they’re made with intentions filled with sunshine and his golden gaze when you’re supposed to be studying, but the temptation is too strong. 

his intentions are filled with the colored pencils scattered on the floor of his dorm room from when you sketched each other for the first time. 

they’re filled with honey coated love, first sweet and satisfying, but eventually leaving you with a sore throat. they leave you feeling his love, but also his lies. 

and through it all, you still love him, maybe even to a fault.

even when he’s yellow.

[bogkeep]

hmmmmmmmmmm maybe i’ll write an Introspective Musing Post about my relationship to religion and their depiction in stories because i’ve pondering about this topic lately

so for those who are reading this and DON’T know what’s been going on...  there’s this webcomic i fell in love with some years ago, about six years actually, that depicts a post-apocalyptic fantasy/horror adventure set in the nordic countries. it had, and has still, some very uncomfortable flaws regarding racial representation, and the creator has historically not dealt very well with criticism towards it. it’s a whole Thing. my relationship with this comic has fluctuated a lot, since there are a lot of elements in it i DO love and i still feel very nostalgic about, and like idk i felt like i trust my skills in critical thinking enough to keep reading. aaand then the creator went a teensy bit off the deep end created a whole minicomic which is like... a lukewarm social media dystopia where christians are oppressed (and also everyone is a cute bunny, including our lord and saviour jesus christ). which is already tonedeaf enough considering there are religious people who DO get prosecuted for their faith, like, that’s an actual reality for a lot of people - but as far as i can tell, usually not christians. and then there’s an afterword that’s like, “anyway i got recently converted and realized i’m a disgusting human being full of sin who doesn’t deserve redemption but jesus loves me so i’ll be fine!! remember to repent for your sins xoxo” and a bunch of other stuff and IT’S KIND OF REALLY CONCERNING i have, uh, been habitually looking at the reactions to and discussions around this, maybe it’s not very self care of me but there’s a lot of overwhelming things rn and it’s fantastically distracting, yknow? like, overall this situation is fairly reminiscent of the whole jkr thing. creator of a series that is Fairly Beloved, does something hurtful, handles backlash in a weird way, a lot of people start taking distance from Beloved Series or find ways to enjoy it on their own terms, creator later reveals to have been fully radicalized and releases a whole manifesto, and any and all criticism gets framed as harassment and proving them right. of course, one of them is a super rich person with a LOT of media power and a topic that is a lot more destructive in our current zeitgeist, and the other is an independent webcomic creator, so it’s  not the same situation. just similar vibez ya feel as a result of this, i have been Thinking. and just this feels like some sort of defeat like god dammit she got me i AM thinking about the topic she wrote about!!! i should dismiss the whole thing!!! but thinking about topics is probably a good thing so hey lets go. me, i’m agnostic. i understand that this is a ‘lazy’ position to take, but it’s what works for me. i simply do not vibe with organized religion, personally. (i had the wikipedia page for ‘chaos magic’ open in a tab for several weeks, if that helps.) i was raised by atheists in a majorly atheist culture. christian atheist, i should specify. norway has been mostly and historically lutheran, and religion has usually been a private and personal thing. it turns out the teacher i had in 7th grade was mormon, but i ONLY found out because he showed up in a tv series discussing religious groups in norway later, and he was honestly one of the best teachers i have ever had - he reignited the whole class’ interest in science, math, and dungeons and dragons. it was a real “wait WHAT” moment for my teenage self. i think i was briefly converted to christianity by my friend when i was like 7, who grew up in a christian family (i visited them a couple times and always forgot they do prayers before dinner. oops!), but like, she ALSO made me believe she was the guardian of a secret magic orb that controls the entire world and if i told anybody the world would burn down in 3 seconds. i only suspected something was off when one day the Orb ran on batteries, and another day the Orb had to be plugged in to charge. in my defense i really wanted to be part of a cool fantasy plot. i had no idea how to be a christian beyond “uuuuh believe in god i guess” so it just faded away on its own. when i met this friend several years later, she was no longer christian. i think every childhood friend of mine who grew up in a christian family, was no longer christian when they grew up. most notably my closest internet friend whose family was catholic - she had several siblings, and each of them took a wildly different path, from hippie treehugger to laveyan satanist or something in that area. (i joined them for a sermon in a church when they visited my town. my phone went off during it because i had forgotten to silence it. oops!) ((i also really liked their mother’s interpretation of purgatory. she explained it as a bath, not fire. i like that.)) i have never had any personal negative experiences with christianity, despite being openly queer/gay/trans. the only time someone has directly told me i’m going to hell was some guy who saw me wearing a hoodie on norway’s constitution day. yeah i still remember that you bastard i’ve sworn to be spiteful about it till the day i die!! i’ve actually had much more insufferable interactions with the obnoxious kind of atheists - like yes yes i agree with you on a lot but that doesn’t diminish your ability to be an absolute hypocrite, it turns out? i remember going to see the movie ‘noah’ with a friend who had recently discovered reddit atheism and it was just really exhausting to discuss it with her. one of these Obnoxious Atheists is my Own Mother. which is a little strange, honestly, because she LOVES visiting churches for the Aesthetic and Architecture. we cannot go anywhere without having to stop by a pretty church to Admire and Explore. I’VE BEEN IN SO MANY CHURCHES FOR AN ATHEIST RAISED NON-CHRISTIAN. i’ve been to the vatican TWICE (i genuinely don’t even know how much of my extended family is christian. up north in the tiny village i come from, i believe my uncle is the churchkeeper, and it’s the only building in the area that did not get burnt down by the the nazis during ww2 - mostly because soldiers needed a place to sleep. still don’t know whether or not said uncle believes or not, because hey, it’s Personal) i think my biggest personal relationship to religion, and christianity specifically, has been academic. yeah, we learned a brief synopsis of world religions at school (and i remember the class used to be called ‘christianity, religion, and ethics’ and got changed to ‘religion, beliefs, and ethics’ which is cool. it was probably a big discourse but i was a teen who didnt care), but also my bachelor degree is in art history, specifically western art history because it’s a vast sprawling topic and they had to distill it as best they could SIGHS. western art history is deeply entangled with the history of the church, and i think the most i’ve ever learnt about christianity is through these classes (one of my professors wrote an article about how jesus can be interpreted as queer which i Deeply Appreciate). i also specifically tried to diversify my academic input by picking classes such as ‘depiction of muslims and jewish people in western medieval art’ and ‘art and religion’ when i was an exchange student in canada, along with 101 classes in anthropology and archaeology. because i think human diversity and culture is very cool and i want to absorb that knowledge as best as i can. i think my exchange semester in canada was the most religiously diverse space have ever been in, to be honest. now as an adult i have more christian friends again, but friends who chose it for themselves, and who practice in ways that sound good and healthy, like a place of solace and community for them. the vast majority of my friends are queer too, yknow?? i’ve known too many people who have seen these identities as fated opposites, but they aren’t, they’re just parts of who people are. it’s like... i genuinely love people having their faiths and beliefs so much. i love people finding that space where they belong and feel safe in. i love people having communities and heritages and connections. i deeply respect and admire opening up that space for faith within any other communities, like... if i’m going to listen to a podcast about scepticism and cults, i am not going to listen to it if it’s just an excuse to bash religion. i think the search for truth needs to be compassionate, always. you can acknowledge that crystals are cool and make people happy AND that multi level marketing schemes are deeply harmful and prey on people in vulnerable situaitons. YOU KNOW???? so now’s when i bring up Apocalypse Comic again. one of the things i really did like about it was, ironically, how it handled religion. in its setting, people have returned to old gods, and their magic drew power from their religion. characters from different regions had different beliefs and sources. in the first arc, they meet the spirit of a lutheran pastor, who ends up helping them with her powers. it was treated as, in the creators own words, ‘just another mythology’. and honestly? i love that. it was one of the nicest depictions i’ve seen of christianity in fiction, and as something that could coexist with other faiths. I Vibe With That. and then, uh, then... bunny dystopia comic. it just... it just straight up tells you christianity is literally the only way to..?? be a good person??? i guess?? i’m still kind of struggling to parse what exactly it wanted to say. the evil social media overlord bird tells you the bible makes you a DANGEROUS FREETHINKER, but the comic also treats rewriting the bible or finding your own way to faith as something,, Bad. The Bible Must Remain Unsullied. Never Criticize The Bible. also, doing good things just for social media clout is bad and selfish. you should do good things so you don’t burn in hell instead. is that the message? it reads a lot like the comic creator already had the idea for the comic, but only got the urge to make it after she was converted and needed to spread the good word. you do you i guess!! i understand that she’s new to this and probably Going Through Something, and this is just a step on her journey. but the absolute self-loathing she described in her afterword... it does not sound good. i’m just some agnostic kid so what do i know, but i do not think that kind of self-flagellating is a kind faith to have for yourself. i might not ever have been properly religious, but you know what i AM familiar with? a brain wired for ocd and intrusive thoughts. for a lot of my life i’ve struggled with my own kind of purity complex. i’ve had this really strange sensitivity for things that felt ‘tainted’. i’ve experienced having to remove more and more words from my vocabulary because they were Bad and i did not want to sully my sentences. it stacked, too - if a word turned out to be an euphemism for something, i could never feel comfortable saying it again. i still struggle a bit with these things, but i have confronted these things within myself. i’ve had to make myself comfortable with imperfection and ‘tainted’ things and accept that these are just, arbitrary categories my mind made up. maybe that’s the reason i can’t do organized religion even if i found one that fit for me - just like diets can trigger disordered eating, i think it would carve some bad brainpaths for me. so yeah i’m worried i guess! i’m worried when people think it’s so good that she finally found the correct faith even if it’s causing all this self-hate. is there really not a better way? or are they just trusting she’ll find it? and yeah it’s none of my concern, it’s like, i worry for jkr too but i do not want her within miles of my trans self thANKS. so like, i DO enjoy media that explores faith and what it means for you. my favourite band is the oh hellos, which DOES draw on faith and the songwriter’s experience with it. because of my religious iliteracy most of it has flown over my head for years and i’m like “oh hey this is gay” and then only later realize it was about god all along Probably. i like what they’ve done with the place. also, stormlight archive - i had NO idea sanderson was mormon, the way he writes his characters, many of whom actively discuss religion and their relationship to it. i love that about the books, honestly. Media That Explores Religion In A Complex And Compassionate Way... we like that i’ve been thinking about my own stories too, and how i might want to explore faith in them. most of my settings are based on magic and it’s like, what role does religion have in a world where gods are real and makes u magic. in sparrow spellcaster’s story, xe creates? summons? an old god - brings them to life out of the idea of them. it’s a story about hubris, mostly. then there’s iphimery, the story where i am actively fleshing out a pantheon. there’s no doubt the gods are real in the fantasy version of iphimery, they are the source of magic and sustain themselves on slivers of humanity in exchange. but in the modern version, where they are mostly forgotten? that’s some room for me to explore, i think. especially the character of timian, who comes from a smaller town and moves to a large and diverse city. in the fantasy story, the guardian deity chooses his sister as a vessel. in the modern setting, that does not happen, and i don’t yet know what does, but i really want timian to be someone who struggles with his identity - his faith, his sexuality, the expectations cast upon him by his hometown... i’m sure it’s a cliché story retold through a million gay characters but i want to do it too okay. i want to see him carve out his own way of existing within the world because i care him and want to see him thrive!!! alrighty i THINK that’s all i wanted to write. thanks if you read all of this, and if you didn’t that’s super cool have a nice day !