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Ageless wonder - Lewis Hamilton
warnings: mentions of alcohol, Toto being an ass (himself)
genre: fluff and teasy Lewis
wordcount: +1k
a/n: I had to, 'shelf life' my ass
As always, I'm open for feedback, come say hi!
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Waking up with a hangover wasn’t new to me, Lewis was the one non-alcoholic Tequila master in the relationship after all. But waking up feeling like my skull is auditioning for the lead role in Crash: The Musical, though? That’s special.
My tongue feels like I licked an old battery, my hair probably looks like I got electrocuted, and the sun streaming through the window is public enemy number one.
And still somewhere through the haze of pain, I catch a whiff of something heavenly: Lewis’s cologne.
Thank God. Home.
There’s a low chuckle near me, and the bed dips slightly. “Morning, superstar.”
I pry one eye open. Lewis is sitting on the edge of the bed, wearing a grin that’s somewhere between amusement and concern, though he’s annoyingly chipper, like he hasn’t just watched me drag myself through hell disguised as a bottle of – real – tequila.
“Why are you so loud?” I croak, turning over to bury my face in the pillow.
“I’m not loud; you’re sensitive” he shoots back, that stupid chuckle rumbling again. “Rough night”
I flip him off without looking, which only makes him laugh harder. “Rough week actually.”
And it has been rough.
Toto, king of ominous sound bites, had suggested, in the newly launched Mercedes book, that Lewis might’ve been near his “shelf life.”
As if Lewis wasn’t out there fighting the excuse of a car they couldn’t understand how to work around, pulling phenomenal races from P10, setting twelve fastest laps, lapping four-tenths faster than his own teammate at some points.
And if there’d been more laps? Well, Toto might’ve had to eat his words on a very public stage.
I’d been at the race, of course. Watching from the garage, headphones clamped tight over my ears, my hands clasped together until they ached. I’d barely breathed until he crossed the line in P2, the garage erupting around me.
The relief was immediate, but it didn’t last.
I caught the frustration in his shoulders as he climbed out of the car, the way it clung to him during the cooldown drive to the podium interview and those mandatory interviews.
He’d wanted more.
He hadn’t said anything directly to me, of course—he never does when the sting is fresh. But I know the weight when I see it.
It’s in the way he’s still tense even as he waves to the fans, in the measured, overly polite answers he gives in interviews.
Watching him absorb the quiet digs, I wanted to storm the press room and defend him, consequences be damned. But what good would it do? Still, the knot in my chest wouldn’t loosen until I saw him smile again.
And then Toto had gone and made it worse. Of course. Lewis’s teammate was “from another planet,” while Lewis was just working with a “super strong car.”
I’d had to sit there and smile politely, even though every part of me wanted to grab Toto by the collar and shake him.
It wasn’t my fight, though—not really. It was Lewis’s. And Lewis, being Lewis, handled it like a pro. Calm. Measured.
Acknowledging his own faults while subtly calling out the micro-aggressions of all sorts he’s dealt with his whole career.
That’s my man. Too classy for this world.
But let’s be real: the post-race party in Vegas? That was for me. Not that I’d ever admit outside of our bedroom, but seeing him relaxed, smiling, surrounded by people who adore him? That was the real victory.
And the price for that? Me, nursing the world’s worst hangover and Lewis, laughing at my expense. Classic.
His voice broke through my thoughts. “You really went for it last night. Celebrating like you won something.”
“I did win something,” I mumble into the pillow.
“Oh yeah?” His tone is teasing, and I can feel his grin without even looking.
I finally roll onto my back, squinting at him like he’s the sun itself. “Bragging rights,” I said. “Because you…” I pointed vaguely in his direction, “…are a goddamn force of nature. And because everyone who said otherwise is a dumbass.”
He shakes his head, amused, but there’s a softness in his eyes now.
“And,” I add, smirking despite the pounding in my head, “I won tequila shots with Miles. That’s also worth celebrating.”
“Clearly.” He gestures vaguely at my disheveled state, and I kick at him weakly with one foot.
He dodges easily, then leans back, holding his phone up with a sly smile.
“Pot, meet kettle,” I muttered, rolling onto my stomach and burying my face in the pillow. Except that pillow smelled like him, which was entirely too distracting.
“What’s got you so chirpy this morning anyway?” I mumbled into the pillowcase, though I wasn’t sure I wanted to know.
He had an uncanny ability to bounce back after days like these, his body apparently immune to exhaustion. I would’ve hated him for it if I didn’t love him so much.
“Just enjoying the comments on your last post,” he said nonchalantly.
That got my attention. I lifted my head to look at him. “What post?”
Lewis didn’t answer. Instead, he smirked and held up his phone, just out of my reach.
“Oh, come on,” I groaned, dragging myself upright. My head protested the movement, but curiosity outweighed the pain. “What did I do?”
“You don’t remember?” His grin widened. “It’s good. Really good.”
“Lewis.” I reached for his phone, but he leaned back, clearly enjoying this way too much.
“I think it’s fair to say the caption was… pointed,” he said, drawing the word out.
“Pointed at what?” My patience was wearing thin, and my curiosity was spiraling into mild panic.
He finally handed me the phone, and the moment I saw the screen, the haze of my hangover lifted just enough to make room for a new emotion: horror.
The photo was innocent enough—just me and Lewis at some ridiculous Vegas afterparty, his arm slung around my shoulders, both of us grinning like idiots. But the caption. Oh, the caption.
“All in on ageless wonder”
And my jaw drops. “Oh my God.”
Lewis is laughing now, low and warm and entirely too entertained. “You went all in, babe.”
I scroll through the comments, and my stomach flips. Hundreds of thousands of likes. Thousands of comments. Most are supportive—#GoatHamilton is trending, apparently—but a few are... less so.
I can’t help it but laugh. “Drunk me is bold.”
“Drunk you is sincere” he corrects, taking the phone back and locking the screen.
“Toto kinda deserves it.” I sit up, wincing as the motion sends my head spinning. “How long can I leave it up before PR calls me personally to tell me I’m banned from every Mercedes garage on Earth?”
Lewis checked his watch like he was genuinely considering it. “I’d say we’ve got a couple hours before the panic sets in. Maybe three if I keep ignoring my phone.”
I grin at him. “Reckless. I like it.”
He grins back, and for a moment, it’s just us. No hangovers, no drama, no shelf-life bullshit. Just Lewis and me, in sync as always.
He kissed me then, and for a moment, the lingering fog of tequila and regret melted away. All that mattered was him—his warmth, his steadiness, his love that he didn’t have to put into words because it was always there, in everything he did.
Lewis always had a way of grounding me, of silencing the noise in my head with something as simple as a kiss. It wasn’t just the feel of his lips—it was the way his hands cupped my face, anchoring me to him, the unspoken reassurance in the way he held me.
He didn’t need words to remind me that we were a team, that no matter how loud the world got, we’d always have this.
And I knew—I’d burn through a thousand hangovers just to feel this peace
“How much trouble are you when Toto sees that post?” I ask after a few moments of us studying each other.
He smirks. “Don’t worry.”
“Remind me to confiscate my phone next time I drink.” I lean back against the headboard, closing my eyes again.
“Not a chance,” he says, and there’s so much affection in his voice it makes my chest ache.
I peek at him through one eye. “You like chaos too much.”
“Maybe.” He shrugs, still grinning. “Or maybe I just like you.”
Damn him.
I roll my eyes, but I’m smiling now, the pain in my head fading to the background. Lewis has that effect on me. He always has.
And as much as I want to give him hell for waking me up, for teasing me, for letting me post that caption in the first place, I can’t bring myself to care.
Because at the end of the day, Lewis is Lewis. And he doesn’t need anyone to tell him who he is.
Although I’ll keep on shouting it from the rooftops if I have to.
Shelf life, my ass.
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#f1 imagine#f1 fanfic#f1 scenario#f1 x reader#lewis hamilton#lh#lh44#lewis#lewis x reader#lewis imagine#lewis hamilton fanfic#lewis hamilton x reader#lewis hamilton one shot#lewis hamilton imagine#lh44 x reader#lh44 imagine#lewis hamilton x you
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Hi I would like to request a part 2 of my previous request for the jinx x fem reader with abandonment issues
"I'm sorry you lost your way home." | Jinx x Reader
(Previous part)
I decided to combine these two, so thank you to the anons and their requests!! I hope you'll like this!<33
(I'm sorry in advance-)
Content: Heavy angst, abandonment issues, heavy spoilers for season 2 act 3, hurt/no comfort, established romantic relationships, death, sfw
Reader was asked to be afab in one of the requests. However, no pronouns are mentioned in the post!
((Not proofread))
The first person to visit you after her disappearance was Vi. The sister you had heard so much about, yet never anything good. But it all melted away at her words.
Your ears were ringing, and for a moment, you wondered if you had perhaps heard her wrong. "... Jinx said that she was going to help someone out before she left with Isha. And... And she swore they'd be back. So don't you lie to me-" You took a deep breath when you stumbled back against the doorway, nearly sliding down the rough wood in terror. Oh, how you wished the ground would open up to swallow you whole.
Vi gave you an unreadable look, her hand hesitantly reaching out to grab you, but she refrained at the last second. You meant the world to Jinx. She had asked her to find you just before... "I'm sorry. But what I'm saying is the truth, I-... They are both dead. There is no doubt about it. I saw it with my own eyes both times and... I can't get the images out of my head." Sweat dripped down your forehead as you only barely heard Vi speak to you.
Life was just becoming good for you... so why did this have to happen?
You both had just recently taken in Isha a while ago and were basically treating her as your child. You saw the way she healed Jinx and made her feel more alive. It meant the world to you to see her that way. And for a while, you perhaps even foolishly believed that things would go well now.
You thought about running away together before, in the darkness of your room, as Isha napped in your arms. You remembered turning to her and whispering, "Let's run away. Let's leave on one of the skyship and go somewhere far away... just the three of us." And you saw it in her gentle gaze, the way she considered it... but it meant nothing in the face of a war she had to fight in.
Looking back on it, you should've maybe seen the signs and listened to the uneasy feeling in your gut when the both of them left for a special mission she refused to tell you about. It was for your own safety she'd say and who were you to intervene or deny her orders? She was always so much more intelligent and stronger than you. You just blindly trusted her. You believed she'd return soon just as she's promised... but she never did.
Neither of them did.
It was radio silence for the longest time. And you hadn't moved an inch from the small apartment Jinx considered to be her second hideout with you and your kid. Not when the war broke out, not when there was a call for arms, not when you peeked out for the barricaded windows at the creepy, white machines that slinked right past your hiding space.
And now you wonder, in the haze of uncertainty and panic, if the balloon you had momentarily seen soar through the sky was her after all. Had the denial misled you into a false sense of foolish security? Did you really, fully believe she'd be back for you? That she'd bring Isha home safely and run away at last? Yes. Yes, you did. You believed it... but received a charred part of one of her bombs in return. A confirmation that it was truly over for the family and future you had built together for the shortest amount of time.
"... leave. Please leave. I can't bare looking at you." You gasped out in-between heaving breaths, unable to stand Vi's presence any longer. Everyone was making you feel sick. What's the point of being a savior if you die? What's the point of seeing a hero if you leave behind what you love the most to suffer in agony?
You had waited so long at this wooden door to your once warm home for their return. For her return. Yet all you were greeted with was the one thing that was left of her. A sister she did still love deep down more than life itself. You, however, could only feel rage.
"Wait. She told me to loom out for you. I can't-" "-I said leave! If it wasn't for you, then we could have left and been happy!" You yelled out, suddenly not caring about hurting anyone's feelings anymore. And god did it hurt. It hurt so much. Because Vi still had a piece of her in her. But it wasn't enough. Nothing would be enough in her and Isha's absence.
Slamming the door into Vi's face and locking it for good measure, you finally fall to your knees and clutch the last, charred thing you had of her to your chest, sobbing. You drowned out Vi's yells and bangs against the door whilst you did so, deciding that if you were in agony, then she didn't deserve any consolation either.
Your worst nightmare had come to fruition, just as the last skyship of the day flew into the sky and left its past behind.
#arcane#arcane x genderneutral reader#arcane x reader#arcane x y/n#arcane x you#arcane jinx#arcane jinx x reader#jinx arcane#jinx#jinx x reader#jinx x y/n#jinx x you#jinx x fem!reader#arcane x female reader
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out of these i'm picking ian mckellan and tim curry in amadeus, but what i really want to see is keanu reeves doing hamlet in winnipeg in 1995. here is a review, and i also put it below
Most Excellent Prince
"What a piece of work is Keanu's Hamlet!"
This is one role that might have been written for the star of Speed, says Roger Lewis.
I crossed oceans of time to find him: 30 hours from my house in France, through several time zones and the polar wastes, to Winnipeg -- of all places the most God-forsaken. Situated in the dead centre of Canada, ice-bound for half the year, once a trading post for the Hudson Bay Co, and now a maze of subterranean shopping malls, Winnipeg is a town even the locals mock: "Winnipeg folk travel a lot -- to get away from Winnipeg";"Winnipeg looks great -- after dark, when the view is better..." They need not be so diffident. The standard of living is high (no beggars, no litter, no germs); they have opera, ballet, theatre -- and Keanu Reeves, the 30-year-old actor who had fled there, to be far out of reach, to play Hamlet.
Let's get it out of the way at once, and wipe that smirk off your face; if you had anticipated Bill and Ted's Shakeapearian Adventure, forget it. He was wonderful. He quite embodied the innocence, the splendid fury, the animal grace of the leaps and bounds, the emotional violence, that form the Prince of Denmark. He has the sheer virility of Larry Olivier's melancholy Dane -- which Keanu saw on video just the other week -- plus the Peter Pannishness, the little-boy-lost quality, that I remember Mark Rylance bringing to the role. He was both vulnerable (as in the scenes with Gertrude when a goodnight kiss goes on and on until mother and son recoil in horror at their arousal) and severe (as in the bit where he flies at Rosencrantz and Guildenstern for presuming to "play upon me...you would pluck out the heart of my mystery").
He is one of the top three Hamlets I have seen, for a simple reason; he *is* Hamlet, and he has been a lonely a resourceful type, who won't submit, in film after film. He is full of undercurrents and overtones, which is why the world's big directors want to work with him. He is killingly attractive, no question. He can look, from moment to moment, faintly oriental, with his slanted black eyes -- he has Chinese, Hawaiian and British blood in him -- or crew-cut clean Caucasian; he can be Californian (especially in his locutions: I'd not been asked whether I felt a really cool dude before) and exotic, like a Canadian-Indian -- I kept seeing his profile in ancient Inuit sculpture, which Winnipeg has museums full of.
But his physique is just the first thing which sets him apart. What counts is the impression we get of a nature that is turbulent and proud -- though he can exude calm and courtliness -- and that he has a gift given to few; like Garbo, he is an actor who can register -- simultaneously -- both pleasure and pain. And, like Garbo, he prefers to keep his own company. He doesn't want to be crowded.
Is that why he chose Winnipeg? A self-enclosed community in the lonesome prairie? He was there without bodyguards or companions; there is not Court of Keanu; no agents or PR persons or those curious factotums, former ballet dancers usually, who tend to cluster around a star, like maggots on a chop. He walked to work, shuffling through the snow (it was minus 25 degrees C) in his curious, dancing, tripping-over-himself way. He'd been seen in a cafe on his own, nursing a Perrier. Here was the paradox of this famous and desirable man, and there is nobody with him, ever. He is loved -- by million of hungry fans -- but does he know how to love? He went to the Prarie Oyster restaurant with the cast, and left early; taking his food away in a doggy bag; he went to an Italian restaurant and left in case two girls at the bar pestered him. None of this behaviour is sulky, tantrumy, make no mistake about that, for he has a great and unfeigned tenderness; it is more that, like Hamlet, he has a world within himself.
He is coping with stardom, and trying to appear normal (when he knows he is not) by ignoring it. He doesn't own a house in L.A. He lives in hotels or in the rooms of actors who are out of town. He doesn't want too easy a life -- the mansions and the flunkeys. He anchors his ship for a little while only, and this is how he struck me in conversation -- though he is sitting there, he is not quite there all the time, as he darts from mood to mood, curving and winding, cautious and direct. Though he had been an athletic, piratical Hamlet, there is this huge, I can only call it ethereal, element. He is retiring from society, from life -- and that might be dangerous; his spirituality could intensify, and he could spirit away. He is in his dressing room hours and hours before the show. I'll bet he is bouncing around and getting himself into mortal and human shape so that he can appear or stage. For he is an eagle, really; or a glossy and supple stallion.
Hollywood, meantime, would prefer this wild beast to be back with them, making more bomb-on-the-bus stuff; there were brokers and moguls, less interested in him than in the money he makes, doing their best to scupper the production. Shakespeare in Winnipeg! Three weeks on a basic Equity rate! When he could be reaping billions after Speed! (After all, reports last week of his sign-up fee for the new movie, Drop Dead, ranged from 4 million pounds to 10 million pounds.) Thus, the Manitoba Theatre Centre, a concrete lump that looks as though it is dissolving, was forbidden from arranging publicity interviews with the Principal Boy; there were to be no press tickets, photo calls, nothing. CBC was forbidden to run a clip of Keanu in action -- so their bulletin was literally Hamlet without the Prince.
Hollywood pretended it was not happening; they were deeply contemptuous and suspicious of the entire affair. The rumor was that Keanu's own representatives would not fly to see his performance until they were absolutely certain he had not made a fool of himself. Supportive, huh? It just makes him the more like Hamlet, coming here, against the odds; embattled. It had been his idea to work again with his drama school mentor, the Toronto director Lewis Baumander, for whom he was once a thrilling Mercutio; and the production was built around Keanu, quite deliberately. Gone is the messy, modern, neurotic Hamlet; Baumander has encouraged us to see the character's sense of duty; and Keanu -- who is himself facing a challange, taking a risk -- would make a good King of Denmark, because he has re-discovered the splendour of heroism, its Camelot quality; which is how he transfigured Speed, giving it extra spin and nuance.
The Winnipeggios were tickled pink to have him in their midst -- they had not seen a star since Charlie Chaplin drove through on his way to fish in the lake -- and this, plus the fact that all 22,000 seats for the run were sold out on subscription (i.e. before the box office opened), was a story in itself. The local press had a Keanu Hotline: "If you see Keanu out and about in Winnipeg, don't keep it a secret. Call 697-7368." But this scheme was spiked -- by the readers. "It's wonderful what he has done for Winnipeg," I was often told, and though most people had indeed spotted him, he was to be accorded respect and privacy. This seemed rather British -- old-fashioned and virtuous -- British like an Ealing comedy. People were so polite, they would phone the theatre and ask if they could ask for an autograph ("He's very approachable," said the receptionist. "You could come and see him in the lobby"). The staff at the Sheraton, not wanting to over-do it, obtained a single signature and photocopied it.
Best of all -- a moment out of a Boulting Bros. film -- was the opening night itself. "Ladies and gentlemen, please be upstanding for the Governor General of Manitoba and Mrs Carlton Browne, and the Lady Mayoress and her goddaughter Patsy." And in trooped these Peter Sellers characters, in medals and ostrich plumes and we sang God Save the Queen. That this was followed by a burst of jangling rock music and Keanu in a spotlit tableau grieving over his father's tomb is I suppose what these days gets to be called surreal.
Afterwards, the cast party: to which the entire audience was invited. Though the Winnipeg Free Press and the Winnipeg Sun reported this as a stellar evening to outrank Graumann's Chinese, the atmosphere, for all the ice sculptures of Elsinore and cavier canapes, was actually much more like a village hall -- with Keanu down at the end scribbling on people's programmes and posters. He was still performing -- or continuing to be, in endless permutation. For each person, he would adjust, to make them special: a puppyish younger brother with men; a chivalric knight when calming the hyperventilating teens; the adored grown-up son to the older women, who want to be his mother, Wendy to his frowning Peter Pan. Men and women desire that he should like them, and he would speak to them and pose for their Instamatics, and they'd fantasise forever that he'd stay with them. (There were no ogling gays in evidence, by the way. Perhaps the Canadian cold snaps keep them down.)
He doesn't need applause; he wants to survive the flattery. His exhortation to me was to deal justly with him. He is measurelessly puzzling and fascinating.
I'll never forget one occasion. It was midnight and we were standing outside the theatre, wrapped up against the cold -- and there was this huge hearse-like stretch limo 20 or so yards away. This was the only touch that said "movie star" and was very un-Winnipeg. "My mother," he said, in his low, soft and furry voice. "She had come to town to see the production," and the sinister car conveyed her -- and him -- around the corner to the Westin Hotel.
Before disappearing, he glanced at the the vehicle with amusement and embarrassement. Dressed in his layers of black, tall and elegant and as slim as a shark's fin, and with the snowflakes softly falling on his hat, twinkling and refusing to melt on his skin, and with his face inclined towards me, so intent you would swear he could listen to the wolves barking amid the ice and frozen rivers, he was very beautiful.
Time Travel Question 67: Assorted Performances VI
These Questions are the result of suggestions from the previous iteration.
This category may include suggestions made too late to fall into the correct grouping.
Please add new suggestions below if you have them for future consideration.
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Louis when he attended his assistant Rachel Day's wedding in late September, via x
#this woman either shares a name with or is a coronation street actress lol#anyway happy for yall if you can reblog the ltcouk post but *I* am blocked for being a larrie so like#have this#if you are wondering why I'm making my own post
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Posting OCs? On main?? That might be a first from me :0
Here are my boys Orfeo and Percy from a webcomic that I'll probably never actually make. They get along I think. 🤷♂️
#tinydraws#oc#original characters#art#character art#tinyOCs#..what do i tag this as...#i'm used to having preset character tags to use#now i feel aimless#anyways if you were wondering why i havent been posting as much tvdint it's mainly cuz i've been trying to work on my oc lore/story/designs#both as portfolio stuff and for my own satisfaction#and not making much progress!! woo!#i /might/ post more oc stuff in the future#or i'll get too embarrassed from this experience and i'll never mention them ever again#one of those two things will happen#time will tell which
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Things that happened in Martyn & Cleo Double Life canon:
Cleo hoping to find her soulmate and start a life with them
Cleo dumping Martyn without giving him a chance to explain his side of the story, but hearing him out when he comes to her later
Martyn watching Cleo through his spyglass and telling the audience she seems safe and happy even though he thinks it's weird she's outside at night
Martyn, after he's had time to consider how he wants to play this, spinning a story about trying to be a provider for her and Cleo explaining that she wanted him, not things
Cleo not being remotely impressed by the "I was providing" sob story, lol
Martyn calling Cleo selfish for choosing to be with Scott because she's supposed to be HIS soulmate and he wants a partner
Cleo willing to forgive Martyn if he meets them halfway
Martyn refusing to meet them halfway because he doesn't think he did anything wrong
Martyn screaming about how Cleo's building bridges with Scott but "When will she think about mending our bridges???"
Martyn explaining to Cleo that he doesn't understand why his Session 1 actions bothered them
Martyn centering his character arc and roleplay on trying to win Cleo back without actually apologizing
Cleo giving Martyn a flower and stating that if he loses it, she'll be real cross with him
Cleo chasing Martyn out of her yard because he tried to put an HOA sign on her base and she wanted to make it clear that she wasn't associated with them and their hate for his base (even though she does think his heart base is strange)
Martyn attacking Cleo after she said attacking is a form of affection to her
Cleo setting boundaries with Martyn and explaining what he can do to get her back
Cleo sighing when Scar set her up on a date with Martyn, but taking the chance to talk to him instead of walking out
Cleo genuinely wanting Martyn in her alliance
Martyn and Cleo giggling constantly when they chat
Scar asking if Martyn wanted him to play a romantic music disc for him and Cleo (and Martyn getting excited and saying yes)
Martyn offering to take Cleo's armor and weapons to the deep dark so he can enchant them and bring them back while she stays safe
Cleo gifting Martyn diamonds, expecting nothing in return but not wanting him to die from lack of a good sword
Martyn and Cleo forming a secret alliance that allows Cleo to live with Scott while being on good terms with Martyn
Martyn expressing frustration that Cleo wants to keep this alliance secret because he wants them to be public allies; Cleo softly shushes him when people approach and might overhear
Martyn telling Cleo that she's putting out a lot of mixed signals because she keeps reeling him in and then pushing him away, claiming he is very confused about where he stands with her
Martyn teasing Cleo by punching her off a cliff and accidentally killing her and feeling so bad about it that he apologizes profusely despite roleplaying as someone who refused to apologize for Session 1
Martyn and Cleo immediately threatening Bdubs together when he said hi to them while they were hanging out, sdkfj
Martyn genuinely apologizing to Pearl for dumping her after Session 1
Martyn hiding under Cleo's bed while she defends him from an enderman attack
Cleo offering to let Martyn move into her house after Etho and Joel grief his base; Martyn saying he might take her up on that
Cleo and Martyn agreeing to move out and base together at Box
Cleo trusting Martyn with the location and resources of her red life base
Martyn rushing to Cleo's aid in the deep dark and trying to turn everyone against him instead
Cleo responding to Martyn's panicked shouts for her to eat by opening her inventory to get food (and drowning because she forgot she was in water)
Cleo hanging back and letting Martyn attack Scott while she does nothing to stop him from doing so, implying as much as she likes Scott, she won't kill Martyn (and herself) for him (and/or she trusted Scott to handle himself even though he ran away while Martyn was shooting at him)
Things that did not happen:
Cleo unwilling to forgive Martyn or consider being his friend and partner
Martyn and Cleo hating each other
Thank you for coming to my TED Talk
#Listen. listen. I understand. but consider... them#Zombiewood#ZombieCleo#Martyn InTheLittleWood#Limited Life canon: Cleo making Martyn godfather to her kids#I 100% support everyone taking their own interpretations from the episodes-#but I often see ''Martyn and Cleo hate each other'' and I wonder ''Did we even watch the same thing?''#and with so many POVs that only see them from the outside perhaps we did not!! So consider... them. Let's rotate them <3#This post is about the sheer amount of 'Martyn dumps Cleo for Ren' fics tagged Martyn/Cleo vs. minimal affectionate fics. help??#also fics where Martyn/Mumbo was canon but Martyn claims he was never attracted to him- only Ren?? Fascinating.#sir can the whole plot be about that because hold up I feel like we should unpack your loveless marriage before you date Ren#I will 100% read a story about you charging into marriage with Mumbo and then going ''Uh I just made a big mistake.'' hilarious#I mean I'm not Ren but if my crush confessed he never loved his husband in the first place I feel like I'd have Questions#To each their own! And I for one greatly enjoy how much Martyn will chase Cleo without humbling himself. lol. idiot. get wrecked.#but just to be clear I am a huge fan of break-up 'fics and choosing to be with someone you want. ergo my interest in Grian/BigB#This post is about Martyn/Cleo and Grian/BigB being fandom rarepairs despite having canon interest in each other#which is 100% fine because everyone should write what they want but!! Come rotate them with me because they are so fun and silly#Grian the man who deliberately cuts comments about Grian/Scar and Martyn/Mumbo from his vids but pursues BigB?? hilarious#In-universe this man went from ''Romance? I do not see it'' to ''Actually I want the cute cookie man'' and took the leap??#Yes king tell me more about this journey of self-discovery. I am aspec-beam'ing you.#Anyway. Need more Martyn/Cleo in my life which is why I'm writing fics of that and other people write fics about what they like <3#but sometimes people don't like it when I pair Martyn and Cleo because ''They hate each other'' and I laugh sfdlkj
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when people make posts about what they want to see more of in fics, i'm kinda like 🧍♀️ ....what is the expectation, like what does that do....
other than other people agreeing and being like "YEAH i'd love to see that too!" like what else does it do......
#i make posts like this sometimes but the thing is#i'm talking to myself bc i make my own food and i don't count on anyone else to do that for me#like if i say “I WANT MORE ESTABLISHED RELATIONSHIP SHADOWPEE” then i'm talking to ME bc i'm a writer and can do that#but when ppl make these posts....who are they talking to?? their followers who happen to be fic authors??#is the hope that some writer will see the post and be like “omg I'LL DO THAT” because...i don't think many writers would do that???#couple reasons why they wouldn't. No. 1 is that you could write something for someone#with everything they want#and they could STILL dislike it#this has happened to me multiple times. and now i just write for specific people i know well enough#for their birthday or whatever but to random people on the internet?#i ain't doing that. so i'm just wondering what those posts do in the long run#well they could ALSO be talking to themselves but when it's a person I KNOW isn't a fic writer i'm just like#HUH??? what does this achieve...#maybe it could lead to friendship based on tastes#but then why wouldn't you make a post like “I LOVE THIS TROPE” and then other people would still agree with you
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the amazing, showstopping, incredible @musicallisto enables me daily <3333
for your consideration <3; you may now rest soundly in the knowledge that i am, in all things, correct.
#not kpop#.jpeg#'olive wtf why are you posting f1 here on your kpop account don't you have a sideblog specifically for this?'#and what if i want to merge my two (2) personality traits and what if i think it vital the kpop girlies know i beef with random famous men?#my beef with george russell continues to go on strong and largely unexplained#obviously lance stroll and i don't fuck with each other.#and moving up the tiers; if i knew estie bestie irl and we were in competition i would tear his throat out and thrive off of his failboy#moments. but because he's only on my silly little screen i can also find him funny on occasion#lando is here for reasons more complicated.#that whole row of 'they're here i guess' is very self explanatory#i put valterri there because i didn't know where else to put him but also i find his occasionally Strange behavior fun. weird uncle core.#and if i'm a checo apologist? what then??#fernando is an icon yes yes but very little brainspace is dedicated to him.#max verstappen deserves a category of his own where in i can go: love hate relationship (pos) i see too much of myself in you to hate but#also when i put aside your loser cringe content and your champion energy i feel like we wouldn't be particuarly close if we were to exist i#the same space at the same time#and then the rest of that row is beloved <333 darling <333 zhou can sweetcorn post more that's all i want from you tbh#and top row makes sense i fear? oscar has been promoted whoop whoop.#if i could isolate his personality and put it in a petri dish that would be a wonderful exercise in personality formation thanks
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not even gonna tag this properly bc i don't wanna get Involved but i do have some Thoughts i need to get out into the void so here we go
(aaa quick edit: CW for mention/discussion of Boothill leaks)
#today's gone Badly and i'm upset but instead of venting abt it i'm gonna channel that energy into doing a bit of tag rambling abt Boothill#well. less abt Him and more abt uh. self-analyzing my anxiety surrounding contributing to fandoms. he's just today's catalyst#like. i know it's mostly a me thing. i'm hypersensitive to criticism and very conflict avoidant + socially anxious + perfectionistic etc.#so I'm the one that keeps myself from posting more stuff out of fear of being criticized or called-out for what i've made#bc inevitably Someone's gonna see it and think its OOC or a problematic take or they'll misread my intent. etc etc what have you#but like. that's inevitable. there's no way to communicate every single thing with all of the nuance required to avoid misunderstandings#and other times it's not a misunderstanding it's just a difference of opinions and that's Fine!! there's no accounting for personal taste#there's no accounting for several things actually. taste‚ bias‚ lore-knowledge‚ differing levels of chronic-online-ness‚ etc#so this isn't me complaining abt the state of fandom culture (although i do think. sometimes. ppl take shit a bit too seriously)#but anyways all of this is mostly just anxiety-fueled. it's not like i very often actually even receive negative feedback or anything#if anything ppl tend to tell me that i'm overthinking it and killing my own fun and worried that my stuff is more OOC than it is#which like. yeah. Yeah u right :) but that's just the way that i am! always losing the idgaf war i suppose#anyways what's Boothill got to do w this ur wondering. well. i've been thinking abt the quickly emerging concept that he's illiterate.#and it just. has me feeling a lot of ways. and watching ppl disagree over it has me feeling some Bad ways. bc it's def a loaded topic!#if you'll pardon the pun there. and i don't rlly have anything new to add other than that i'm conflicted abt it.#like yeah i saw the leaks days ago. of him mentioning 'not hitting the books' much as a child when we ask him why he sends voice messages#or voice Transcriptions ig. ykwim. and like. *braces for impact* ...i liked it? like. it doesn't feel right to call it endearing#i'm not trying to infantilize him. ok that's not the right word either but ugh. you know? what i mean?? who am i kidding even i don't know#it's not quite right to say that it feels like Representation either. but it's something close i guess#as a southern person myself who didn't receive a 'complete' education due to factors that weren't to do with my intelligence#the concept of seeing him as a capable force to be reckoned with and respected who also happens to have not received much formal education#i like that. i do. but there's so many issues w it at the same time. like. as i said‚ being southern myself has me Wary of the way Hoyo is-#writing him. as well as of the way that the fandom is taking the bits of his lore and running away w them. and i'm Very aware of how ppl-#will see a southern character and be All Too Eager to agree that they're lacking intelligence based on our Redneck™ stereotype#sigh. and before we even go too far with this. it's not even confirmed that hes completely illiterate. which is a valid criticism i've seen#there's Multiple reasons that could make him prefer voice to text. but regardless. i'm just worried that ppl will misconstrue my intentions#like. example: that edit i made the other day of him saying 'no thanks i can't read'. wasn't me playing into the stereotype of-#'haha dumb country boy can't read!' it was. in my eyes. something he'd say as a joke to make light of a potential insecurity#like. i think there's far more depth to Boothill's character if ppl could look past the surface. and i dont wanna contribute to the problem#but sometimes ppl Will have stereotypical traits and i wish the same could apply to characters as long as it's done Thoughtfully.
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deeply compelled by this photo
#heretic tag#finishing rec lists by doing the most important part - using my 30 image allowance to splice up the text#and well they can't all make it... and i'm fond enough of this photo i'm posting it on its own#I Just Think It's Interesting (and slightly comical) how friendly they are to each other in person for the most part#like you'll get them saying the foulest shit about them in the press and then u compare with the footage/photos from the time and go?#now sure you could say being polite to a coworker you hate is an incredibly low bar. but. like. it's often not one riders clear!!#I feel fairly confident about why this is the case from valentino's side of the equation#casey's is a little more... hm because the thing is it's not like we have a big enough feud sample size to compare with#but i just find it something kinda fun about him... like yeah he's blunt to the point of being wildly tactless...#but also friendly with valentino who he thinks is basically the devil... he has layers...#//#brr brr#WARM smiles towards someone he at this stage definitely loathes as a rider if nothing else... idk it's interesting#it does add a specific fun vibe to that rivalry imo#like they are SO nasty to each other in the press and then it's all :)) how have you been valentino :) congrats on the wonderful race :)#the list is done btw i need to read it through two more times to grammar check (not fact check i don't believe in that) and then i'll Post
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Reading Stazio's Thebaid (and watching L'Odissea 1968 rai miniserie), it's terrifying how the greek gods mess with people's minds to reach their ends. Zeus wants to destroy two cities, Thebes and Argo, and instead of bringing about a forerunner Sodom and Gomorrah (or second, I'm fuzzy on the timeline), he plants the thought in Etheocles' mind that he want to keep the kingship for himself and inspires bloodlust and a desire for war in the youths of Argo. He puppets the two cities by effectively stripping their leaders of wants, thoughs and personality and puppeteering them into a war no one wanted. We don't even know if the desire to keep Thebes was always there in Etheocles or if it's all Zeus' creation.
Basically, it never matters what a mortal wants, not because a god can effortlessly overpower them, but because a god can easily make it so that they never wanted anything other than what the god desires them to want. It's horrible. You can never know if what you wish and think is truly something that comes from you or if a god planted it so that you'd do their will
#of course this isn't limited to the Odyssey and the Thebaid#but I didn't pay as much attention to it before I guess#or rather. the gods often plant/elicit emotions in people#mostly lust and love. you know how it is. Phedra - the mother of the minotaur whose name I can't remember rn - ecc#but in the Thebaid it happens to an impressive scale. Entire cities#and all because Zeus has decided that they will destroy each others as punishment#idk this is very much one of those 'I knew but am only now Realising' moments#it's impressive#I've always loved myths but I've never read that much greek and roman literature so I'm sure this has been#whatever I'm not self flagellating on my own post#epica#it's interesting though because the judeo christian god afaik doesn't do this#it mostly causes natural phenomena and makes things happen in people's lives#either by destroying something of theirs or by gifting them something#but he never messes with their thoughts#but I could be wrong#but as someone that doesn't believe in any god I wonder what it must be like to live in a world#full of gods that can change you completely to their whim#rewrite your personality whenever it suits them#but then they can also take an interest in you and destroy your life while leaving you perfectly aware of everything#why would you ever believe in such a world
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If I may be weird and petty for a moment, I don't get AUs where Martin is the Archivist when Melanie and Sasha are right there?? I mean I get why: roleswaps are popular AUs and martin is a popular character. And maybe its just my specific headcanons re: archivist requirements but I feel like the other two would be so much better?
Yes, Martin reads statements and yes, he gets marked, but I really don't think those are the Only Requirements to do the big ritual? Cause at that point Elias could've chosen any web-marked dude off the street, especially if they have the mark of another entity as well already.
Melanie and Sasha shared several important traits with Jon, most notably a burning curiosity, a willingness to put themselves in trouble for information, and (in Melanie's case (and Sasha's too, arguably) an ability to antagonize extremely dangerous fear avatars. Sasha's whole statement is her putting herself in a dangerous situation without telling anyone or acquiring any help (remind you of any main characters?) and running face first into supernatural dangers (sometimes to protect her friends, sometimes out of curiosity). Useful for collecting marks, but also useful for collecting information and developing her own powers as the Archivist. Considering her seemingly unrepentant willingness to look through her friends' and coworkers' personal files via accessing their accounts, I'd argue that her curiosity and boundary crossing could easily get stronger when investigating supernatural entities. Obviously, this never happened because of how early on she died, but I think you could make a strong case for Sasha's strong curiosity making some avatars incredibly mad. Not to mention how incredibly Beholding it is of her. None of this is criticism btw, I think Sasha should have access to whatever personal info she wants and I love it when characters are so obviously Eye-aligned. I know "Sasha wasn't promoted because she'd solve all the problems and find a way to kill Jonah" is also a popular headcanon but please think for a MOMENT about her appearances in podcast. There weren't many, but there's a very obvious through-line in almost all of them. She's curious, she takes risks in the face of the supernatural, she wants to Know. It's literally what caused the circumstances of her statement. Those traits are arguably the ones that got her KILLED. I'm sorry this went off on a tangent. I just love Sasha very much and I'm constantly filled with Thoughts of Sasha.
Melanie also has curiosity about the supernatural AND a much more obviously antagonistic personality!! Her first appearance is being a total asshole to Jon, mocking him, the place he works at, the equipment they use, and what they do. But she also dedicated basically her entire career into uncovering the supernatural? She ran a Youtube channel about it, and when she discovered that everyone was sticking to the same "safe" sites, she started looking off the beaten path for the real stuff. And she found it! She went looking for ghosts of war and violence and even without access to statements, probably working alone and sifting through bunk on the internet, she found them! She got stabbed by a ghost and instead of trying to avoid ghosts in the future, she decided to look for more violent ghosts. The slaughter tendencies might be a drawback for her becoming the Archivist, yes, but by that point Jon had already survived multiple marks and was developing his powers. If he failed by that point, Elias might've wanted an Archivist who'd be better able to defend themselves. By S4 Melanie was probably far enough gone to the Slaughter (and hated the Eye enough) that she was probably off the table as a candidate. By that point, however, Jon was expected to fully Become and only needed a few more marks.
I understand that Sasha was approved for a transfer to the Archives because Elias let Jon choose who take with him and Jon chose Sasha. And Melanie was almost certainly chosen to keep Jon in close proximity of a Slaughter-aligned person who'd be likely to mark him but unlikely to kill him. But I think that they served a secondary purpose of being backup Archivists in case something happened to Jon.
Obviously this is more headcanon than theory (not to mention it relies on other headcanons to fully stand) but I'm very fond of it. I guess I think that, even if Elias wasn't really looking for another Archivist when Jon seems like the perfect candidate in every way (and I'm not saying this JUST because I love him), I think that if something did happen to Jon, they'd be Elias' next candidates.
#I hope this makes sense?#I've been rotating this idea for a while but I'm not sure if its fully baked yet#might need more time in the oven#if you're wondering why I opened with petty complaints about martin being the archivist#it's because I am Filled With Spite and I Do Not Like Him#and I think he'd be a bad candidate#which is its own post#anyway my Sasha opinions are almost as high as my Jon opinions#my Melanie opinions are... mixed leaning negative#but I think she has archivist potential#I think its important for the archivist to be curious#and for a majority of the marks to stem from active choices they made#to interact with the supernatural#anyway not maintagging this#I've only just started a relisten after not listening in a while#so let me know if I've forgotten something important#or missed a line that invalidates all my headcanon-crafting#I know I post a lot of jonship stuff but I PROMISE I care about other aspects of the show#I got some meta stuff thats been percolating in the brain soup so you can possibly expect more of that in the next couple days#anyway I gotta go now#goodbye
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You want to know how bad my memory is?
I was writing last night and I just straight up forgot that Sanji exists. I have been watching this show since 2012, he was my fave Strawhat outside of Luffy pre-TS, and I FORGOT HE EXISTED.
I was like 'hm yes well the ones who would understand are Nami and Robin... W- wasn't there one more I was thinking of a moment ago? Wasn't there another one who'd Get It?????'
'it's not Chopper. Definitely not Usopp. And it's not Zoro. That's all the remaining Strawhats at this point in the story. So... Why am I convinced I'm forgetting someone? Let's go through the arcs in my head agai- OH MY GOD, I FORGOT SANJI'
#When I tell you my memory is shit... 😭 I used to own a Sanji shirt. What the fuck??#When that post about the memory issues finally leaves my queue#Like I joke about it but this shit can be genuinely terrifying. Like knowing my brain is getting worse. Knowing I'm probably forgetting#Seriously important things and just 'oops I can't remember haha'#It's scary.#I'll never get better because I'll just relive the pain over and over because my brain refuses to remember the help and progress I make#Every day I wake up back at step 1 it's so depressing and scary and horrifying and I hate it#I can never process anything bc I just forget and if I do remember it's like a punch to the chest for the first time every time#And people get SO sick of you after a while. Constantly asking for help. Never remembering anything. They get so annoyed with you.#Anyway. On a lighter note (not actually) I'm trying out a new one-shot :)#Not to speak ill of the 'soon-to-be' dead but Garp was a shit grandfather#So I was like What If Me And Luffy Had The Same Reaction#Because self love starts in recognizing your self through the other god damn it#Even if I finish this idk if I'll post it bc of how personal it is but it has been very cathartic to write#Then again I could just publish it anonymously so my irl friends won't see it. No harm no foul.#I (kid) once pushed my mom (grown adult) out of my room when she caused me to have a meltdown so I could 100% see Luffy doing the same thin#In my defense she had a habit of taunting me and destroying my stuff to punish me after inciting meltdowns and I just wanted to be alone#I was like 7 years old at the time (hell year hell year) so I doubt I actually hurt her. She just looked surprised. I remember that.#Sometimes I wonder why I identify so much with werewolves and then I remember ah yes. The childhood of being treated like a monster.#Like a freak because when people kept pushing your boundaries you'd rather bite than let them do whatever they want to you#Oh boo hoo such a terrible thing for a child to be... Protective of themselves...#ANYWAY. like I said this wasn't going to be much lighter.#I want Luffy to punch the lights out of Garp to protect his friends. Not even in-canon just in this fic#Ik in-canon Garp is a complex guy and loads of fans love him but... Smash eggs make sandwiches know what I'm saying?#Yeah GROOVY
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really upsetting that black history month just feels performative to me. not when other black ppl celebrate it ofc, but white people won't do shit for it. except drown out the voices of people the month is supposed to commemorate. or just ignore it completely? but you Know they have blm or acab in their bio somewhere
#realizing i dont see much talk about bhm because white ppl refuse to center it. and as it so happens?#the vast majority of posts you'll see online are gonna be from white ppl.#i wonder. if im the only black mutual yall have on here sometimes. likely Yes.#idk. i just wish yall would do better. im tired of this shit#another tangent thats slightly related ig. yall get too fucking comfortable ignoring us when we call for help#i make so many of these posts only to be met with silence. I'm talking to You! say something! if i say i feel invisible as a black woman-#why would you not Say something? yall do this All the time. idc if it'd be clunky and uncomfortable you'd be doing more than most ppl anyway#cant even have a discussion about shit like this in my own polycule cause it falls on white ears to hear.#swagever . who cares
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STOP I OVERPLAYED ODE TO JOY WHILE LEARNING PIANO 😭😭😭😭😭
However! I am happy to share and am so glad you see the vision. Sorry In Advance to you and all your followers for the spam but here is a (mostly corrupted) office tour (please note the "Mine Power"-brand gym equipment):
P.S. I recall really liking The Wings of the Kirin, please enjoy!
EVERYONE OVERPLAYED ODE TO JOY GROWING UP IT CAME WITH YOUR PARENTS FORCING YOU TO LEARN THE PIANO LERKJALEKJ
BUT OH MY GOD NO DON'T APOLOGIZE THIS IS LITERALLY PERFECT I thank you again for my life this is so important to me you have no idea
#fave#snap chats#'parents' more like my mom.#BUT YEAH I PLAYED ODE TO JOY ALL THE TIME GROWING UP TOO ITS WHY I HAD A STROKE AT THE END OF Y7 VLKALVJLK#getting the sims just to make mines apartment brb. fr tho why the fuck dont i have the sims thats Architecture Simulator#but more importantly i have a sick obsession with having the layout to buildings#i havent posted any of them but i have a bunch of sketches of various rooms/buildings in the RGG series#i dont imagine many people would want to see those so thats why i have them hoarded#obvi i ref them when drawing stuff but theyre also just fun to draw....#THIS type of stuff is BEYOND valuable to me tho this is my crack. my cocaine even. i live for shit like this#my dad used to be involved with architecture and real estate so i'm gonna blame him for that#BUT MORE IMPORTANTLY im saving all of these theyre so so so important to me i cant thank you enough#im sure others will greatly appreciate these as well#even if it's a bit 'corrupted' i can definitely DEFINITELY salvage these#im going to laugh if he has his own gym equipment brand. is that what his company's done this entire time#was his 'research' just gettin fuckin yolked Cant Believe This#i wonder if mine has a bedroom somewhere though i cant imagine it being in the same room as the piano. unless rich people do that.#theres just so much dead space in that area aside from the piano and it looks like to be a pretty sizeable room.. PURELY just The Piano Roo#like its fuckin luigis mansion over here. not impossible i guess. very strange thing to have. esp if its connected to the GYM#its not even in connected to the main part of the office where you can realistically be like 'lets go into the next room for piano'#you gotta cut through the gym first bro what the fuck is this#but what are those closet-esque bits behind the piano? unless im blind. what purpose would you have to put a closet in a piano room#if its sheet music you keep that under the chair or something#even through the mesh it still looks like those lead to a skinny hallway... idk im rambling#ill study these more in depth later BUT THANK YOU AGAIN#OH BUT i'm about halfway through the movie so far and im def enjoyin it !#i always like it in crime shows/movies where the answer seems Obvious at first but then as the case goes on its like#Oh God Wait. Hold On Let's Double Check#again i'm halfway through the movie but i always love it when i feel uncertain about the situation ☠️☠️#it's just fun watching all the pieces come together so yeah im def enjoyin !
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Daily Log 4
Trying out (probably just temporarily) making short daily-ish notes about things, in an attempt to see if it helps me be more reflective or productive lol.
Activities: Woke up late because I went back to sleep with a headache briefly, then kind of struggled to focus all day ToT
Worked more on the aforementioned tapestry/painting type of thing. I've done the base layer of painting for the main image, now I'm lining in darker outlines. I wanted to finish the center art before getting into the intricate borders. Still haven't translated the text lol..
Made a small bowl and also a little box with a lid out of more avocado pits. Still just with random nail cuticle tool things and kitchen knives, as I don't have proper carving tools.
Finished editing and proofreading the new poll adventure post!! I don't have time to post it tonight because I need to get to sleep early but.. I have it Completely 100% Ready.. finally..
Also washed the clothes I got together yesterday. Called about the bloodwork. Sent an email to a doctor.
Reviewed some writing documents to get back into my game maybe?? (basically, I started working on a visual novel type game a few years ago, decided it was a huge project so kind of put it on the backburner for a while in favor of things that were more easily finishable/tangible. then later on a game website I play (similar to neopets or something, there are collectable little creatures, etc.) there was an opportunity for me to design a pet on site, so I made a smaller shorter visual novel centered around that, where people on the site have to play the game in order to earn the pet, and I have a google form for them to answer a few short questions about it. All of the feedback is quite positive (reached 200 responses a while ago! though still only like 4 comments on the itch.io page lol.. Mandatory Form vs. Optional Comments evil showdown), but sometimes I get commentary that's really enthusiastic and inspires me to start back working on the OTHER bigger game. The small game was kind of like, a proof of concept that was safe because I had a guaranteed audience, that has helped me gain more insight for the larger one.
Anyway, since I've abandoned the Main Large Game for so long, I have to re-read and review/probably rewrite A LOT of things just to pick it back up again as A Thing I'm Actively Working On, so it's another one of those tasks that I do maybe 45 minutes of and then realize it's going to take days and days and get discouraged lol..
Notable sights: Saw two cats in windows. No clovers. It rained a little today but I didn't get to go outside and see it. One of the pieces of asparagus in the fridge was like the size of a carrot, comically overgrown downright ridiculous looking asparagus. Maybe I'll get taller after eating it.
Goals moving forward: Consistent sleep schedule. Focus on social activities, finding new friends in the places I want to move, communicating with ones I have. Physical therapy exercises. Plant nasturtiums. Finish and upload videos, edit costume pictures & etc.
Notable foods: ASPARAGUS AGAIN BABEY.. yeaAAAAGHHH asparagus squad !!!!!!
#just posting these publicly since it feels more like I'm doing something or easier to hold yourself accountable if you make public#declarations of goals and progress or etc. .. perhaps.. for now..#I wonder if you can eat too much asparagus. Hopefulyl I don't get sick ghjbj#Still craving lots of savory foods and soups. Also in a big big worldbuilding mood.#Not enough to actually edit the worldbuilding slideshow videos apparently since I've barely done any of that all week#>:Y#(they are different though.. actively writing wolrdbuilding is different from like.. editing recordings of you talking about it#BUT STILL...)#In an ideal world I have a little house in scotland or canada or something and am sitting cozy by a window watching it#rain whilst I eat lasagna and like a huge buffet table of every single hearty food I am having Anemia Cravings for#and my cat is sitting near me and I am furiously sketching various designs for different worldbuilding details. I have finally found#a weird hermit platonic best friend I'm compatible enough to live with and they are up in the attic doing their own weird little hobbies#but every once in a while I can call them down and tell them about an idea so we can bounce concepts off of each other. I somehow walk away#with no heartburn or stomach upset or nausea despite eating 800 plates of craving foods. It's cold and summer#does not exist anymore but not in a Catastrophic For The Earth type of way more in a like.. I am in a magical bubble#that only affects my direct vicinity and sheilds me from the temperature ever getting above 65F#(also I have a comfortable amount of money and good doctors and reasonable health etc. etc. but that's a given in any Ideal Scenario lol)#oughh... I just want to eat hearty breakfast foods and think about elves for 5 hours.. is that so much to ask#Why must... responsibilities... capitalism... limited time and no energy to focus on 100 projects at once... why these things...#ANYWAY#daily log
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