#if you are terrified of men bcs you were hurt by one

[lastoneout]

like idk how else to say it anymore but there is a REASON that a lot of terfs are sexual assault survivors and it's specifically BECAUSE those women come pre-loaded with a severe and easy to exploit fear and distrust of men

[koishua]

shining solo ep 8. my reaction rn 😐😐 took it a bit hard lmao

[churipu]

HAIIII IPIN !!!!!!! can i request gojo, geto, and nanami (separate) having a gf that's really optimistic? just someone who sees the good in everything and anything, and positive at all times! thank SOOOO much !!!!

JJK MEN + OPTIMISTIC GIRLFRIEND

featuring. gojo satoru, geto suguru, nanami kento x fem! reader

warning. people being mean to u >:(

note. HAIIII ANONN!!! i love this request bcs sometimes i read books, mangas, watch movies, you name 'em and see a certain character having the most positive mindset and i just go must protecc >:( anyways, thank you anon for requesting just after i opened the request box, istg i love all your ideas so much it makes me feel full <;33

GOJO SATORU. absolutely hates the way you try to see the good in people — specifically people who have hurt your feelings in the past. he just wonders what goes on in your mind to just forgive and forget everyone who has wronged you.

you did. but not him.

"baby, that guy called you names when you were in high school!" gojo whines, laying down on the bed, draping an arm over your torso, "why are you still willing to meet him?"

"satoru, he said he was sorry!" you smiled at him, tracing his features softly — the male grumbled but leaned into your touch, "and plus it's not nice to hold grudges, it's been what? how many years?"

a loud whine escapes his throat as he pulled you close, "it doesn't matter how many years it has been, he still hurt your feelings. and nobody does that to my baby," he said, miffed.

you couldn't help but to chuckle, "well, you are coming along, so i have nothing to worry about."

the male grins, "damn right i am coming, he better sleep with one eye open starting from now," gojo threatens.

gojo just cannot wrap his head around your concept of "forgive-and-forget" because you never hold grudges, you forget everything and still talk to people who've wronged you, and you still have the heart to accept them.

as much as people say "forgive and forget", they end up at least holding the tiniest bit of grudge — or even a bigger grudge, right? but you? you don't. you actually forgive and forget.

well — thankfully, not him. he takes his job to protect you seriously, from any kind of harm, including monsters (people who were mean to you) both in the past, present, and possibly the future.

"baby, can you stop hanging out with that one girl? the one who always wears the purple colored eye-shadow?" he asks you, wrapping his arms around your waist.

"hm? why?"

"i don't like the vibe she gives out. it's giving...well...cruella de vil." he murmurs into your neck, nuzzling his nose in content as you went on with your skincare routine.

"satoru," you mumbled, "you can't just judge her by her vibes."

he groans, "but baby, i swear i could just feel it! she's evil," he whispers in your ear.

"satoru."

"okay, fine. just tell me if she does anything to you, i'll give her a piece of my mind (hollow purple)." he mutters out, pouting and upset as you brushed his speculations off.

GETO SUGURU. he loves it and hates it at the same time. geto loves how positive you are against the world — and what more does he need, really? it's you and him against the world at this point, although he feels like he doesn't contribute much to your positive energy (that's what he thinks).

geto thinks of himself as a pretty negative person. and you know. the both of you had a lot of deep talks about everything, including what you both had in mind. and honestly, geto wasn't surprised if he hears you talking about how your life was going smoothly; and his was just a contradiction to what you have.

it's life, people come and go. but geto seemed skeptical of that term, why couldn't people come and stay? he finds it hard to believe that you could be the one leaving him at anytime of the day, and the thought just terrifies the male.

the death of amanai put a hole in his mind that couldn't be closed off, and it fucking scarred him. but you were there for him, you didn't sugar coat words or tell him white lies — you tell him everything, straight to his face, and your choices of words made him feel loved. what else could he ask for?

"'m sorry," he mutters into your shoulder, and his voice comes out a bit muffled.

you brushed his nape gently, "it's alright sugu, you know you don't have to apologize for being sad, right?" you tell him, pressing a kiss onto the side of his head, "it's okay to be a little sad."

sometimes he asks himself if he really deserved you or not. but at the end of the day; you always convince him that he deserved it.

geto hates your optimism sometimes because he watches people trample over you and you brush them off with a smile, it makes him feel angry. he asks himself why you were doing this to yourself? believe me when he tried asking you to try talking back, or putting up a fight.

"angel, you know it makes me kind of sad that you'd let people talk to you that way," he said to you, grazing his finger over your cheek gently.

you shot him a gentle smile, "'ts okay sugu, what good do i get from arguing back to them, really?"

he just pulls you into his embrace, nuzzling his face into the crook of your neck, saying nothing. god, he just wanted to protect you from the world — why does everyone have to be so fucking mean to you?

"will you be mad if i tell them off for you?" he asks

"depends on your methods, tell me about it."

"threatening them. if it doesn't work, violence." he mutters out briefly.

"sugu, no."

NANAMI KENTO. he doesn't mind it, he finds you endearing, really. a cat getting hurt? he'll accompany you to the vet with it. or a child crying because of a fall? he'll watch you help them without any single thoughts behind.

he just loves how selfless you are. nanami once read a quote, "when given the choice between being right or being kind, choose kind." and every time he sees a selfless act from you — he just kinds of chanted it in his mind, and tell you what, nanami is such a proud boyfriend.

nanami loves how you see the good in everything, a person spilled their food on you? you tell them mistakes happen. a person bumping into you and then blaming you for it? you tell them you're sorry and thought that maybe they just had a really bad day.

but sometimes he couldn't help but to worry over you — someone so positive, bubbly, and optimistic around people who (probably) have disgusting minds. when he's not around to keep an eye on you, he just worries that someone might took advantage of your kindness and throw it out the window.

and he wouldn't be there to stop it from happening.

"ken, i'm going to go out for a hang out. it's fine, i've got my friends with me!" god, the jitters that he gets whenever you mention your friends — he was never really fond of the friends you have now, especially since they were trying hard to earn his attention. he knows they were just using you.

the texts they sent to him behind your back, the shit-talking about you, and everything else. god, he wanted to tell you about it; but he just didn't have the heart to, because he knows it will break your heart.

although nanami told them off quite rudely, defending you — it baffled him to how they still try to hang out with you with no shame after. and he tried telling you about how he doesn't like them, but you tell him it was fine.

"may i come along then?" just the thought of leaving you alone with those people pisses him off to the core, if he can't stop you from being friends with them — he will be with you.

when you agreed, he made it his job to expose them as nicely as he could. and he succeeded, oh the ecstasy he felt when you finally told them you didn't feel like hanging out with them anymore.

(and he ended up showing you the texts).

© CHURIPU 2023 , DO NOT COPY OR REPOST ANYWHERE !

[nanawritesit]

WWDITS Headcanons: You Having the Opposite Aesthetic of Everyone Else at the Vampire Residence (fem!reader)

tw: vampires, blood, corpses, mentions of killing, mentions of virgins, immortality

you were brought into the house to work as nadja and laszlo’s familiar

after having so many familiars die on the job, they had pretty much lost hope that they would ever find one that was right for them

so when you of all people, with your brightly colored hair, glittery makeup, long nails, and hot pink platform boots, were still around after a few weeks, they knew you were special 💞

of course they had their doubts at first, thinking you were much too soft for the job based on your cute aesthetic, but you surprised them with how tough you were

you had no problem finding them victims, cleaning up blood stains, and disposing of corpses. the promise of eternal life was much too great for you to give up because of some gore

nadja is overjoyed to have another woman in the house, and quickly becomes more of a bestie than a boss (as long as you do all of your duties as a familiar too)

she requires you to attend weekly “girls nights” with her, the guide, and mini nadja, but even if they weren’t mandatory, you’d happily go along

sometimes you’ll get all dressed up and go clubbing, taking everyone’s drinks for them since they can’t ingest human food

you stick out like a sore thumb in your pink sequin mini dress and heels, the rest of them shrouded in black lace, but you have an amazing time regardless. they really know how to party!

but sometimes you just have sleepovers where you watch mamma mia and talk shit about all the men in the house

laszlo didn’t take you seriously at first. he never really saw the appeal of having a familiar, thinking he got along just fine without one, but wanted to please his good lady wife

he could never understand how nandor was so attached to guillermo. he was just some human who followed him around and did his bidding

that was, until you came along

he found it was really nice to have someone to practice his music with, to organize his library for him, to help him into his coffin every night… and after a while he really grew quite fond of you

which scared him, because he knew how fragile human life was

but that only made him want to keep you under his wing more, to protect you until the day him and nadja decided to turn you

they love having you accompany them on their nightly walks, carrying their parasol behind them as they bask in the moonlight

they’re super protective of you, especially from people who assume you’re an easy target because of your looks

like, if anyone tries to mess with you around them, lazslo will yell at them to go fuck off, and nadja will practically go feral and rip their heart out

you’ll have to BEG her not to hurt them for her to even CONSIDER letting them go 💀

nandor pretty much falls in love with you upon first sight

he absolutely adores your style, loving how unique it is compared to anyone else he knows

he tries and fails to flirt with you all the time while you’re working, until nadja eventually yells at him to leave you to your chores, and he’ll scuttle away bc he’s scared of her 😀

he sometimes asks you to do his makeup like yours, saying he wants to “glitter like twilight”

his undead heart stops when you lean close to his face to do his eyeliner 🥺

he desperately wants to ask you out but is terrified of what nadja would do to him should you agree

she thinks you’re MUCH too good for him

he eventually goes to laszlo for help, since he’s such an “expert” on modern women 💀

he agrees to help him, but tells him that if you guys start dating and he hurts you, he’ll kill him 😗

guillermo is honestly just so thrilled to have another human in the house to sympathize with him 😭

the two of you quickly become partners in crime, dragging bodies down the stairs together and recruiting virgins for your vampires to feast on

he also wouldn’t hesitate to slay any vampire who tried to feed on you

you always stick up for him when the vampires aren’t taking him seriously, which helps since they all value your opinion tremendously

nandor gets a bit jealous when he finds out that you and guillermo get lunch together everyday 😭

guillermo admittedly gets a bit jealous when you’re turned into a vampire before he is, but is obviously very happy for you

but since nandor has such a soft spot for you, you’re able to convince him to turn guillermo sooner :) that way you can be a big happy vampire family forever

collin robinson thinks you’re quite entertaining, although he gets frustrated at the fact that you somehow always dodge all of his attempts to drain your energy

when you go out on the town with everyone, you have major scary dog privilege

when you walk by, people see a pretty pink princess 💞

and then they see the three huge, dramatically dressed vampires, one emotionless suited man, and one monster slayer walking behind you and they’re like oh shit nvm 💀

[esther-dot]

i'm a sansa stan first and foremost, and i tried to ship s@nsan so hard lmaooo but when they start saying shit like "sansa has wet dreams about the hound" and "sansa actually likes older men", argh, i just can't. do. that. i know george said something about playing with it in the books, but i also think that he wanted to raise a few questions with the relationship, one of them being "who protects sansa from her protector?". like, there's TRAUMA in there. it's funny that they accuse jonsas of using sansa as a self-insert bc i don't know if you ever read a s@nsan fic or saw the fanarts, but they REALLY wanna bang that man 😭

(about this ask)

Nothing in the fandom horrifies me as much as Sansan. I’ve had nice Sansans come into my inbox, so I do distinguish between my feelings about the ship and the shippers, but I hate the reinterpretation of the Hound because it minimizes what he did/tried to do to Sansa. Instead of the later scenes where Sansa thinks of him being about her processing the trauma of his assault, suddenly, they become a gross villain whitewashing, victim-blamey, “actually, she wanted it.”

I once even highlighted that whole "who will protect us from the guards" idea you mention because I think it was meant to emphasize what a travesty the Hound’s assault was:

(link)

This isn’t a romance, this is a pattern. The Hound saves her than tries to rape her, Tyrion is kind to her then agrees to marry her, a child, a prisoner of his family, and LF rescues her but then starts to sexually molest her. All the same, in each of these instances, Sansa is grateful, she thinks kindly of them, and I think that says a lot about Sansa that you completely miss if you romanticize it and pretend that the Hound is someone, something to her, that he isn’t. I also talk about the whole cloak thing in that post too because I think the more contextualized reading is the one we’re meant to adopt.

When I did take a look at the meta, I was so creeped out by the nature of it and the art. Although, I want to give credit where it’s due. Apparently they were some of the first people to start taking Sansa seriously and created the reading of Sansa becoming a political factor, so they did change the fandom’s perception of Sansa in a good way. But imo their love of the Hound causes an imbalance in how they read their scenes. The point isn't that the Hound wouldn't have hurt Sansa, the point was that he very well might have but Sansa's actions stopped him which ties into a much bigger idea and important aspect of Sansa's story:

Even after the Hound assaults Sansa, later, she thinks of how terrifying the fire was, as in, even then, she is able to empathize with him, the man who held a knife to her throat and threatened to kill her. It’s laughable to suggest a man who mocked her relentlessly for who she was is capable of the same consideration. In fact, it is in a state of terror that the Hound attempts to rape Sansa and his fans use that to excuse his actions, and yet, while he is assaulting her, Sansa sings of mercy, gently touches his cheek. It’s almost like the very obvious interpretation, that the way to create a better world is Sansa’s method— not his— is what Martin expected people to understand, and his surprise people have turned it into something else altogether is genuine. (link)

As for Martin admitting he "played" with it, here's a clip. It's very short, and he's expressing surprise that his female readers like villains of which the Hound is one, and I think you can tell by his facial expression that the idea of the Hound and Sansa as a couple, is absolutely not where he ever intended to take things, not what he meant when he said he played with it. There are countless old monster movies with the monster being fascinated with a young girl or beautiful woman which humanizes him/shows a soft side. That's similar to Beauty and the Beast, the girl is what allows the monster to become human again, but in these variations, it isn't a romance. You can play with/reference tropes and ideas without it actually being a direct reiteration of the original story.

Anyway, filter and block and curate your fandom experience! 😅

[inmyhorrorsera]

S5E8 "The Roast" thoughts:

Ok, I watched this episode three times and I'm still smiling. I love when you think and episode is gonna be about something because of its title and then surprise you when its all a misdirection (see also: Succession's "Connor's Wedding").

At first Laszlo's err… state intrigued me, love everyone projecting and imposing their own insecurities (Guillermo's secret, Nadja's hex) as a reason on why he is behaving like that. And of course it's a stupid reason 😭.

"And a flat pepsi for Guillermo". Oh Nandor, that's the worst thing you ever done to Guillermo, that's the worst thing you could do to anyone. And yes, I remember a certain S4 episode.

I screeched like a bird when Colin mentioned dreaming about being a baby under Laszlo's care, not only because I wanted this shit to happen since the past finale, but also I really thought the episode was going on that direction (and also bc its another W for my predictions).

Having said that, LOVED the nonchalance of Nadja and the others when they were like 'no, it wasn't a dream, that totally happened'.

I mentioned it in a separate post: they really had a Sweet Dee in IASIP moment when The Guide gave the roast idea, only to be ignored and then the same idea being stolen by a dude who is celebrated.

Seanie's poor brain it should be soup at this point, we don't know if he can hazily remember the event like it happened before.

What can I remember is his line after Nadja's roast because it was one of the biggest laughs for me: "Women CAN be funny!" I fucking loved it so much, it's the perfect condescending shit straight men say all the time, even when they're trying to be complementary to you they can't stop being garbage. It was a simple line but Anthony nailed the delivery and timing. Seriously, rewatch that part.

At first I was confused why all the jokes were so mid, but shortly I realized this episode wasn't about the roast at all, lol.

Just by watching screenshots of other users I noticed that in the scene of Nandor resting his head on Guillermo's shoulder there's a BIG flame between them. LMAO. There's no way that is unintentional.

Good for The Guide being the catalyst of Baron Afanas learning the truth. I was demanding more screen time for her lately, so having some incidence in the main plot goes on the plus column.

The other guests present at the roast being shocked at the knowledge of Guillermo killing vampires surprised me; I always assumed Guillermo being a familiar/slayer was a known fact in the vampire community after his very public massacre at the Théâtre des Vampires.

Fuck yeah when I realized this is a Doug Jones spotlight episode, I just fuckin ahgdjkaksdf, love him, perfect, no notes.

The Baron being terrifying!! Guillermo was seriously scared for the others and he barely tried to show off his Van Helsing abilities.

Nandor and Nadja begging the Baron to not hurt Guillermo!! 😭 Them being dragged while grabbing the cape!! 😭 They're spiritual siblings to me!! 😭😭

They really reminded me a little bro and sis begging their mom to not hit their beloved older brother with the chancla for talking back or something.

I fell for the two fake-outs with the sack lol I'm so gullible when it comes to vampires I guess.

NANDOR PAINFUL SOUNDS (MOANS???) WHEN HE BELIEVED HE WAS IN FRONT OF GUILLERMO'S INERT BODY. IT WAS SAD BUT ALSO A LITTLE HORNY!!!

"At least he died doing what he loved: beating off in the toolshed."

A wonderful small detail: After Laszlo opened fake Guillermo with the knife he cleaned his hands on The Guide's dress.

Idc if you think its dark, the whole 'Nandor will kill you and then kill himself' bit becoming a recurring joke it's peak writing.

I wish I can say something more serious about Baron Afanas' sadness over how boring his life is now. But I just keep thinking that the way he talks about his homelife with The Sire and the Hellhound sounds exactly when a dude has a middle life crisis and suddenly he doesn't enjoy his marriage anymore. They're husbands!! And I loved how cunty he looked at the end all half-charred (see posted gif) Queen!

Now, the Nandermo of it all: What more can I say than incoherent screaming and foaming from the mouth? Episodes 8 are all about them again!! Nandor on the window looking all cliched melancholic heroine of a romance novel?? How relieved he was when he found him in the coffin??? Him still remembering Guillermo's card word for word???!! Knowing that this toxic dark sided devotion goes both ways???!!! Borrowing the words of Fleabag: THIS IS A LOVE STORY.

Seriously, I know all these soft Nandor moments are here so the heartbreak when he learns about Guillermo being turned it's even bigger. But still denying that there is a romantic undertone between these two it's just being purposely adamant at this point (i'm looking at you wwdits reddit). Even if nothing explicitly romantic happens on screen, just by watching these moments, I know, we know.

Now, go listen to the ending song again. You will not regret it.

[petrichorium]

very important question for my dear pluvi,

which of your faves like to bite vs who loves being bitten? 🎤 and if they do the biting, where do they like to bite you the most? >.> heheh

Omg,,,,,, i tried to sort them but nah it doesn’t work like that lmfaoooo i have a few who refuse to bite me and a few who r more bitey but they all like being bitten i fear. Kuroo is perhaps the one im Least Bitey with tho, i think its mostly love nips between us. Ik u didn’t ask but I tend to go for arms and hands LMFAOOOOOO and necks ofc. I get hella cuteness aggression and end up Biting I fear. Also have been known to bite the base of ring fingers Very Hard pre-marriage to give them a little wedding ring shadow but we don’t have to talk abt that 🫣

Capitano and Tomura r the ones who refuse to bite me bc they both r dead terrified of hurting me i fear, but i think the instinct is there. Esp w Capitano (bc until i am proven otherwise he is a dragon hybrid to me) it’s an active effort to not claim me but i think if he ever drew blood from me he would lock himself in a room for weeks and refuse to let himself anywhere near me so. The biting urge must be suppressed even if i do tell him it’s okay 😭😭😭

Shanks and Gagamaru r def equal opportunity biter/bitees (tho leaning a bit toward preferring I bite them). And theres a double standard wrt intensity w them JFNCKSNF like they r both very gentle w me but want me to just go at them pfft i think Gagamaru is a bit of a stomach biter….. little nips at my navel or love handles. Shanks goes for my legs and Will try to get marks as low as possible and then pout when I wear a longer skirt the following day. These two r def known to goad me into biting them I think, w gagamaru often giving up on any subtlety and just unabashedly begging for it and shanks playing stupid ass mind games which I sometimes play into or sometimes just tell him to ask properly…… and we cannot forget shanks’ favorite joke he loves sauntering into the galley in the morning and loudly saying “wow plu might bite off my other arm!” (Or similar) w marks very visible beneath is way too unbuttoned shirt I hate him so much he should die

And then Jing Yuan and Leona r the ones who give as good as they take 🙂‍↕️🙂‍↕️ Leona’s a bit more variable—I hc him as having a cycle and being largely uninterested in sex outside of his rut (tho when I initiate he doesn’t tend to deny me) so it’s kinda. Nothing and then So Much All At Once I’ll disappear for a week and come out of our suite looking like a chew toy 🫠 v much a boobs man tho so even outside of his rut he’s known to chomp a tiddy and earn himself a swat over the head…….. as for jing yuan I fear he’s a menace of the highest caliber. Like I’m pretty sure he bit me during our first kiss he is Not playing around. Definitely the bitiest of all my men, and definitely the only one that is truly comparable to me pfft sometimes gets a bit competitive abt it even and will literally give exactly what he gets. He’ll bite anywhere he can manage for sure but honestly I think I Always have a mark or two on my neck that I’m always trying to cover up w my shirt collar or makeup…….. was even more prone to toeing the line when we were in our nebulous “fucking and seeing each other but not exactly official” phase bc my flightiness and borderline commitment issues were driving him up the wall. Sometimes even after we’re married he’ll remember and bite down a bit harder 😭😭😭 unhinged behavior. I wonder if he does it just to make me pull his hair harder……..

[sugar-omi]

oh my GOD SELF AWARE COVE HAS SO MANY POSSIBILITIES IM GONNA BE THINKING ABOUT THIS FOR AGES

JUST- the thought of Cove slowly realizing he’s going through a loop over and over and over and with every loop the MC starts to look and feel stranger and more far away to Cove and it’s driving him INSANE. Cove starts to keep track of these loops and notices that sometimes things get ever so slightly different or drastically different (say the players deciding to romance a different character or is doing a 100% platonic playthrough etc etc)

THE WHIPLASH COVE WOULD FEEL WHERE IN ONE LOOP THE MC IS ALL LOVEY DOVEY THEN IN THE NEXT THEYRE COLD AND INDIFFERENT TOWARDS HIM CAUSE THE MECHANIC OF COVE FEELING THE SAME WAY WOULD JUST BREAK UPON HIM BECOMING SELF AWARE

Cove having to deal with the feeling of closing his eyes as an adult only to open them and see he’s 8 years old again. What the hell just happened???? He was just at his own wedding with the love of his life and now he’s suddenly a crying child back on the poppy hill!!

AND THEN- and then Cove paying more attention to the MC as the loops go by and seeing them fade into this weird uncanny husk, they’re starting to feel more like a puppet than a person, and it terrifies him. What’s going on??? Are they okay?? Why is this happening to them????

Soon enough as he looks at the MC he finally notices and realizes that the MC “never existed”. This whole time the person he’s spent basically his entire life with never existed as someone in Coves world. No, instead they’re just a projection of someone else. Who? Coves not sure, but he feels like that whoever it is they’re the person who he’s actually been falling for over and over again.

And at that realization he come to the conclusion that he needs to meet this person beyond the veil, and he needs to meet them now.

This got kinda horror adjacent I apologize I got carried away-

NO THIS IS PERFECT

it tears him apart every time bc if you choose to romance someone else or not befriend/romance him, he can't say anything different since he doesn't have control over the system and he doesn't wanna alarm you

so he's forced to feel indifferent to you, and even in between he can't talk to you bc you're not real, the "you" that's here isn't interested in cove, and if "you" do take interest in him it's bc of the system, and everything is set in place as always

slowly he works out how to get to you, and he's leaning over you in his buff/lean, (tatted,) 6+ foot glory and teary eyed, asking why you keep playing with him, experimenting on him like this, making him watch you confess to baxter after he's loved you for 15 years. asking why you'd make that deal n choose his best friend derek over him.

well, it doesn't matter anymore. you can be together now, don't worry about his life in sunset bird, you can just build a life together just the two of you for now!!!

he actually prefers you like this compared to the game. you can say whatever you want without limits or prompting. and he can see your expression, hear your voice, actually touch you...

oh, and please don't go anywhere without him if possible or look at other men, fictional or real, with interest. he's everything you need, you've made him to fit your needs every time. you've came back to him hundreds of times in the end, so if you see smth you like on another man, cove will change his style, look, or behavior so just stop looking else were.

unless you can't, then he'll have to punish you. make you look him...

don't worry, he won't hurt you! he really could never do that, no matter how broken or.. well, twisted. he is

just wants to make sure you remember you're his, and he is yours. so if he makes you sit in his lap for hours, making you trace his face and body and features, telling him everything you love abt him inside and out, then just do it.

and if he decides to punish you in other ways, you can handle it right? you've played his 18+ dlc's multiple times, you read all those dirty stories abt him and you always kiss him n grope him when you can in the main game

he just wants to love you, and be loved by you for real. so indulge him a bit, won't you?

[livelaughlovesubs]

Is star anon okay 💀. I'm actually concerned. I personally have never tried uh. Any of that, because idk how but like. That sounded concerning. Extremely. Bleeding isn't normal right...?

~terrified, but lowkey impressed 🧁anon

No, bleeding isn’t normal. There is a false rumour that, if you are a virgin and have sex for the first time, you have to bleed which isn’t true. It’s just another rumour for woman to feel bad about themselves when they don’t, and see hurting themselves as something good. The bleeding is caused by real wounds after all. If the bleeding is minimal, it’s most likely not serious, but if it’s a lot there can be other factors playing into it. For example, cancer.

That rumour I mentioned is about the hymen, how virgin woman have a thin layer of skin (irl it’s a thin piece of tissue) in their vagina that will be pierced through during their first time, which is causing the bleeding. Some parts to it is true, like for some woman tearing their hymen can make them bleed, but it doesn’t apply to everyone. More often than not girls rip their hymen by doing sports like gymnastics or others. Though it doesn’t hurt.

I think it’s more common if you tear a lot of your hymen, like forcefully inserting something big, and then bleed. It’s not okay, cuz bleeding is always a bad thing. Also there are many, many ways a woman’s hymen can look like, from birth on. Here a illustration as example (all credits to Sandra Bayer) as you can see, there are some who’s hymen is closing off the entire vagina, but there are also some who are born without one. Not having one is totally fine while having one that closes the hole off was dangerous, cuz it blocks off your periods, and it can have painful symptoms. There are op’s to fix it though.

So, in other words, the ‘virgins must bleed’ and “every woman has a closed hymen” is complete bs. I read on Twitter that it’s just earlier men’s way to make themselves more important by believing their dick can change a woman forever, physically. I mean ig that’s true if they plan on literally hurting their partner and making them bleed for some stupid reasons.

Anyway, short conclusions. Bleeding during sex means simply the other person (or you) was/ were too rough, the vagina/ butt was still too dry, or you are sticking something too big inside without proper training aka. Ripping your tissues (hymen) too much

Man I talk about sexual education a lot these days, does it help you guy? Cuz I know there are many countries where they don’t talk about these things, bc it’s embarrassing. (It isn’t!!! There is nothing shameful about wanting to know more about your own body!!!)

[xf-cases-solved]

S2E1: Little Green Men

Case: Welcome to season 2, where we start our journey with a melodramatic Mulder monologue. We love to see it. Or... hear it. Whatever. Point is, Mulder is feeling very poetic and melancholic about the Voyager program and the High Resolution Microwave Survey (both are real, btw), and this is relevant, bc at the long abandoned HRMS observatory in Puerto Rico, a transmission has suddenly started coming in. Could it possibly be from... aliens???

Well, Mulder certainly thinks so, and apparently so does his friend in congress, who tells him about the situation in Puerto Rico, and tells him to get his butt down there while he tries to hold off whoever it is who wants Mulder not to learn things this episode. Mulder—having no sense of self-preservation in the slightest and also a new job that he fucking hates—goes without a second thought. From there, the episode becomes a fun back and forth between Mulder's exciting Puerto Rican holiday (in a dark, abandoned building, as he makes melancholic tape recordings for Scully, bc that's who he was talking to in the voiceover, the fucking sap loser), and Scully desperately trying to get to Puerto Rico so that she can drag him back to Washington like a dog that got loose from its collar. Again.

Mulder and Scully both miss the X-Files and each other and it's cute as well as sad; Scully's "Mulder is doing something stupid" senses start tingling, so she guesses another password and breaks into Mulder's computer files; Mulder plays charades and pictionary with a terrified Puerto Rican man named Jorge; and Assistant Director Walter Skinner says NO to secondhand smoking. 

We're off to a great start, fam!

Does someone die in the cold open: Yes. Senator Richard Bryan murdered the High Resolution Microwave Survey project in cold blood 

Does Mulder present a slideshow: No, but he does eat an INSANE amount of sunflower seeds

Does the evidence survive the investigation: Well, Mulder literally says the words, "Nothing but evidence, and again, no evidence at all," so I'll let you take a guess.

Whodunit: You know, I don't think either of them were technically on a case this episode, so. No one, ig. 

Convictions: See above.

Did they solve it: Nothing to solve bc it wasn't a case, but also... yeah, no. They did not. -sad trombone sound-

[how do i determine if a case is solved? check the scale here: x]

THIS EPISODE IS SPONSORED BY: The Duolingo Owl. There are over seven thousand languages in the world, and yet, we as a species know so few (especially if you're American -- y'all, we do not do enough language learning in school). Learning a new language can broaden your mind, open you up to new cultures, and expand your social circle. You also never know when you may be trapped in a derelict building during a thunderstorm/alien invasion with a frightened Puerto Rican man you are incapable of communicating with because you didn't pay attention in Spanish class.  Lucky for you, the Duolingo Owl can help! By sending you moderately threatening lesson reminders every day, the Duolingo Owl helps ensure that you're on your way to learning a brand new language. So don't hesitate! Download Duolingo now to get started. The Duolingo Owl — our favorite little green man!

[as of the moment i am posting this, my duolingo streak is 2,632 days. anyway]

***

General Total Stats:

(green means stat has changed since last ep; red means new stat added to list)

Total Cases *Definitively* Solved So Far: 12 (nothin'. off to a good start guys!)

Total Number of "Mulder/Scully, It's Me": 3

Total Number of Times Scully Has Conveniently Not Seen Something Crucial: 6 (yeah, you know what, i'll say her conveniently not getting to puerto rico until after the whole -gestures at whatever that whole bright light situation was- counts)

Total Number of Times Mulder Has Been in Mortal Danger: 8 (i feel like if he had been in legitimate mortal danger then he would have died, but nothing hurt him, just freaked him out a little)

Total Number of Times Scully Has Been in Mortal Danger: 8

Total Number of Sexually Charged, Uncomfortably Intimate, and/or Flirty Moments Between Friendly Coworkers: 13 (there were a few i could count here that are borderline, but the two that definitely cross the line are mulder saying "i used to only be able to trust myself... now i can only trust you. and they've taken you from me," bc what the fuck, and then also the end where he says "i still have my work, i still have you," and scully grabs his hand, bc again, what—and i cannot stress this enough—the fuck)

Total Number of Autopsies Scully Has Performed On Screen: 3 (none, but it was actually really adorable how mulder was dictating to her in the recording about the state of jorge's body. i mean, rip jorge, but he was doing his best to give her information about the scene, not just for himself, but bc he knew she'd need as much documentation/evidence as possible to come to any conclusions)

Total Number of Times Scully Plays Doctor: 2

Total Number of Times Mulder Talks to an Informant: 14 (he doesn't come up much, but i'll count senator what's his face as an informant, sure) 

Total Number of Times People Making Out in a Car Are Hurt or Killed: 2

Total Number of Times Someone Correctly Guesses a Password: 3 (the impenetrable computer password of special agent fox mulder: trustno1. god i love the 90s)

Total Number of Nosebleeds: 4

Total Number of Times Mulder Has Tasted/Sniffed/Touched Something Questionable Without Following Proper Safety Procedures: 2 

Total Number of Times Someone Says "Trust No One": 3 (ok, i wasn't sure how to count this bc it was said aloud, but then it was also caught in a loop being said on the tape, and so instead of counting every individual time, i'm just going to a singular blanket tally for the whole episode)

Total Number of Times Someone Says "I Want to Believe": 3

Total Number of Times Someone Says "The Truth is Out There": 2

Total Number of Cigarettes Cigarette Smoking Man Has Smoked: 8 (but skinner told him NO SMOKING!! 😡) 

Total Number of Maggie Scully Sightings: 1

Total Number of Lone Gunmen Sightings: 1

Total Number of Alex Krycek Sightings: 0 :(

Total Number of Times I Had to Look Up What State the Episode Takes Place in Even Though I Literally Just Watched It: 9½ 

Total Number of Times I Had to Look at an Episode's Wikipedia Page to Fill This Out Because It Was Fucking Confusing and/or Too Boring for Me to Pay Attention: 5 

[oh good, the next episode is the host. that's definitely an episode i don't find unbearably disgusting and haven't watched in years bc i always skip it when i rewatch the series. so excited. hooray 😐]

[frogwithgun]

Satosugu!!!! Bc we love them here.

Takes place before the girls are in Jujutsu Tec!!

----------------------------

It's quiet. Almost to quiet. And that's not a very good sign for Geto or Gojo.

See the two men had come to their daughters school to talk to their principal. Gojo still really had no idea what was going on. All he knew was the girls had gotten in trouble and he needed to be at the school with Geto.

Hand in hand Geto looks concerned. "Suguru what happened?" Geto shakes his head and sighs. "The girls got into a fight." Gojos mouth forms into the shape of an oh and he nods. "Did they win?" Geto immediately smacks his shoulder.

"This is not the time to be asking! Why would our girls fight someone?!" Gojo shrugs. Mimiko and Nanako are very well behaved girls and usually never got into trouble. Till today it seems.

The girls sat in the principals office. Mimiko glaring at him and Nanako just rolling her eyes. "Where are your dads?" Nanako shrugged and groaned. Mimiko sighed. "We didn't do anything wrong." Nanako nodded.

The door burst open and Geto rushed to the girls. "Are you ok? Are you hurt? Bruised? Bleeding? Limbs still intact?" Gojo laughed and sighed. He patted Mimiko on the head gently and sat down. Geto following suit after making sure the girls were ok.

Geto crossed his arms and Gojo put his hands on his knees. "So, what's the problem?" The principal looked shocked. "The problem is that the girls were fighting!" Gojo rolled his eyes. "Mr. Gojo this is unacceptable and not tolerated at our school."

Gojo raised an eyebrow. Behind his signature blindfold Geto knew he had a mischievous look in his eyes. "Really? So who threw the first punch?" The principal stammered. "T-that is not important-" He was quickly interrupted by Mimiko. "It was that girl Aoi we always tell you about."

Gojo nodded and looked at the principal. Knowing his work was done. "What?!" Geto stood up from his chair and slammed his hands down onto the desk. "You told me that Aoi had been handled. That she wouldn't bother my daughters again." He was shaking with barely restrained anger.

The girls laughed and Gojo covered his mouth to hide his smile at the principals terrified expression. "We did!" "Then why is she still harrassing my daughters? I thought I made it clear what was supposed to happen. Shouldn't she still be suspended?" The principal was at a loss for words.

But Geto pressed on.

"I told you I wanted to have a proper talk with her mother. But you said that it would be overkill. So I thought we made a happy compromise. She's suspended for two weeks to learn her lesson, and you keep your job." The principal shifted in his seat.

"But clearly you want to be fired. You want to look like an idiot. You want to be unable to find work in education ever again!" Geto laughed dryly. "Well, good news! We," he gestured between him and Gojo, "can make that happen!" Geto sat back down. Glaring at the principal.

Gojo cleared his throat. "Now, I don't know about my husband but I don't want to see you jobless. So let's make the right choice, yeah? You expell this brat that's harrassing our daughters, and we don't press charges!"

A beat of silence passed through the room.

Gojo clapped once and smiled. "Sound good?" The principal nodded. "Great! Now," he turned to Geto, "you take the girls to the car," he turned back to the principal, "while I thank this gentleman for listening to us today."

Geto nodded and stood. Not before giving the principal one last dirty look. "Come on girls." They stood up happily. "Ok!" They said in unison. The door closed behind them and Gojo stopped smiling. "If you ever call me or my husband down here for some stupid shit ever again, I will make sure you lose your job."

The principal nodded and Gojo left. A smile on his face.

----------------

Geto was gripping the steering wheel so tight Gojo swore it would break. "Suguru relax. The girls are fine." Geto nodded. "I know. I just," he looked at them in the mirror. Both of them were looking at something on Nanakos phone and laughing, "I worry that one day we won't be there to get them out of trouble."

Gojo nodded and put a hand on Getos thigh. "They can get themselves out of trouble. Have some faith." Geto nodded and smiled. "You're right." He sighed. "What would I do without you?"

"Ew! Gross!"

"Yeah! Stop looking at each other like that!"

"Cut me some slack! It has been two weeks since I've seen your dad!" Gojo argued back. Turning in his seat to look at them. Mimiko was covering Nanakos eyes and Nanako covered Mimikos. "Still gross!"

Geto rolled his eyes. It was nice while it lasted.

-------------------------

Omg it's been a while since I wrote something. Sorry if this sucks I just wanted to get my little fic out.

And thank you to everyone who has been so patient with me.

And if you are waiting for part four of the modern AU do not worry it is coming soon!

As always love you and take care of yourselves! 💚

[chromotps]

YOU MENTIONED ACELU MODERN/GANG AU. but what about — I know it’s cursed but please listen — supernatural AU? I don’t mean like the entire thing (monster hunting maybe, but not the entire angel/demons plot) but just consider the vibes of the first two seasons?? The “road-trip” thing. Struggling to get by (I’m such a huge sucker for “Ace struggling to make ends meet but he always makes sure Luffy gets food and clothes even if it means he’s not eating as much himself”-dynamic in modern AUs. God). Sleeping in shitty motels + having to share the bed more often than not. Taking care of each other’s wounds in dimly-lit, dirty bathrooms. The general, ever-present worry of how things are going to be in the future or the terrifying scenario when one of them doesn’t make it (except Ace just worries about Luffy, bc of course he doesn’t consider a future where he lives and Luffy doesn’t. Neither of them can think about it too long either way bc it makes their brains shut down). They’re blood-brothers, they think of each other like that, they call each other that except. Taking physical comfort from each other is also a thing, because that’s what they’ve been doing all their lives, because there’s always been just them, and it’s all they ever had. They kiss and sleep together, bare skin pressed against bare skin because it’s always been like this, and it doesn’t feel the same with anyone else (mostly on Ace’s side, because he did try — with barmaids, waitresses, men in shady bars, because he felt responsible for Luffy’s upbringing and well-being and it felt like an older sibling thing to set and maintain appropriate boundaries. But nothing ever compared to Luffy, even in the slightest). Both of them having to play so many social roles they kind of start blending into one another (because again, there was never really anyone around long enough to fill them in for them) - bc yeah they’re siblings, but. They’re also friends except it goes way beyond that. Ace, as the older one, has been Luffy’s caretaker too, he had to think and plan ahead for them both. But there were times when Ace was hurt they the caretaking role became reversed and Luffy had to take on all the responsibilities, until Ace recovered. Obviously none of it is how a healthy sibling relationship should look like, but god, I’m just soooo weak for the developing co-dependency, especially in scenarios where clearly unhealthy/potentially harmful behavior becomes a source of physical/emotional comfort (and tbh I’m pretty sure it also translates well into in-canon Ace/Lu because they didn’t really have anyone else either, for a couple of years in their lives. And Luffy needs social interaction like he needs food and sleep).

Oh man, anon, I was shipping and reading smut for Wincest like WILD back in the day, so. This AU is perfect. I'm eating up all the details of it just being the two of them, and a car, and a map. On a good day they'll get to jam out to music for a few hours on the road before pulling into a diner, and Ace splurges on treating him and Luffy to a meal of steak, burgers, shakes and pie.

But on a bad day. They get out of a rough fight, Ace with a nasty gash down his chest but they can't get help between all their papers being forged and being wanted for a crime they were framed for anyway. So for once Luffy drives them back to the motel, and sets Ace up in the tiny bathroom tub to clean out the wound and patch it up. The whole time they're just quietly saying stuff to each other like "thank you. you didn't have to take that hit for me. it saved my life" and "you're the only reason i do any of this. nothing else matters." "you matter. it's always been just you and me, right? what would I do without you?" and then... idk MaybeTheyHave"Thank God You're Alive"Sex or something who can say?? you know???

but omg yeah I LIVE for some codependency in my ships. I do have this weird thing where whenever I write headcanons it's like I'm in denial. like, I can't totally commit to calling it unhealthy even though it totally is, bc.... they're happy together!! Maybe they learn to accept help when they need it from some kind of Uncle Bobby figure (Jinbei?? Rayleigh??). but when it comes down to it, they only really care about staying with each other and keeping their brother safe.

I'm not really sure what's up with me today but I'm sort of in a horny mood so. I'm still thinking about what you typed with "They kiss and sleep together, bare skin pressed against bare skin because it’s always been like this," and I know you probably meant literal sleeping together. But I love thinking about the slippery slope Ace and Luffy took in the AU from "pressing each other close for comfort when they're shaken" to "Luffy noticing how good it feels when Ace holds him and Ace unable to stop his eyes from lingering on Luffy's lips" to "one time in the dead of night in the hotel, their breaths are mingling and their mouths are almost touching until, it isn't 'almost' anymore. and then somehow ace is on top of luffy and the orange glow of the streetlight outside is falling on where their arms are wrapped around each other. and even though that night should have been shocking, what they can't admit out loud is that it felt completely natural. it's just another part of everything that they are to each other, and no one else needs to understand this, either."

ANYWAY UH I can. talk about other aspects of this AU since I'm sure there were other things you meant to focus on but uh. I was in a mood. oops!

[inconveniently-discorporated]

Like, I'm just ✨sick of this shit✨, ok? I'm sick of this shit. I AM SICK OF THIS SHIT. I'M FUCKING SICK OF THIS SHIT. I'M FUCKING TIRED OF SEEING DEAD BABIES ON MY FEED AND HAVING REAL LIFE PEOPLE (with their behavior and words they know are in my earshot) TELL ME THEY'RE BETTER THAN ME AND THEY DON'T RESPECT ME BECAUSE I'M A WOMAN. AND I DON'T EVEN HAVE IT THAT BAD AND OTHER PEOPLE HAVE IT WORSE AND IT MAKES ME SICK.

I am fucking sick of knowing that:

The chair of my city's Republican party PUBLICLY says that women are ONLY equal to men when it comes to making babies, and otherwise it is "WORKING MEN" who are the key to society because villages don't raise families, MEN do. And NO ONE gives a singular SHIT that he said this

My coworker AGREES WITH and supports people like this.

I REGULARLY CLEAN UP AFTER MY COWORKER WHO SITS ON HIS PHONE ALL DAY LISTENING TO TRUMP SHIT AND OCCASIONALLY SONGS THAT HAVE HOZIER NO SIR THAT IS ✨NOT✨ FOR YOU. BUT I HAVE TO SIT NEXT TO HIM -- AND,

Listen to him TALK SHIT TO HIS FRIENDS ABOUT HOW NO ONE WANTS TO HAVE DAUGHTERS BC SONS ARE WHERE IT'S AT AND BLAH BLAH BLAH, LIKE I HAVE DAUGHTERS AND THEY'RE PRETTY FUCKING GOOD YOU ASSHOLE?

Fucking jesus fucking christ it's the stupidest fucking bullshit I've ever heard of. This man sits here listening to his bullshit AND I DON'T EVEN KNOW IF I'LL HAVE RIGHTS NEXT YEAR????? BUT HE'S BETTER THAN ME????

So like, I was pretty big into HP awhile back because I was bullied heavily as a child, and I found a lot of solace in those stories. Even more when my parents died and I really related to that aspect of the stories. I thought it was about welcoming those who were otherwise unaccepted, those who were cast out for dumb fucking reasons. It heavily shaped my worldview into believing I should be KIND and ACCEPTING and fight against bigotry.

And like. Look. I have trans friends who are the KINDEST, SWEETEST, BRAVEST, MOST HARD WORKING people I fucking know who are just as TERRIFIED of being jailed or killed as I am of my little girls being shot bc their mom is a pretty staunch supporter of lgbtqia+ and POC and women's rights; or trump gets into the Whitehouse and decides to level the blue cities to send a message. So obviously it was pretty crushing when the author of the works that INSPIRED ME TO BE THIS FUCKING EMPATHETIC IN THE FIRST PLACE decided to double triple quarter pounder cheeseburger down on being a bully to people like this.

WHY SHOULD MY FRIENDS BE THIS TERRIFIED WHEN THEY'RE THE BEST PEOPLE I KNOW, AND OTHER PEOPLE IN MY LIFE WHO ARE LAZY FUCKING DUMB ASSHOLES JUST GET TO DO WHATEVER THE FUCK THEY WANT WITHOUT CARE??????? "WHY SHOULD I CARE ABOUT ABORTIONS IT'S NOT LIKE I'LL EVER NEED ONE" BECAUSE YOUR DAUGHTER MIGHT NEED ONE SOMEDAY AND COULD DIE WITHOUT IT? WTF WHY DO THESE BULLIES ALWAYS GET A FREE PASS TO BE BULLIES???????

And I'm not going to comment on today's news because it broke today and maybe there's more facts and maybe there's not but what I am going to say is it fucking SUCKS to think that someone who was an advocate, maybe doesn't really respect you or people like you, maybe hurt people, maybe doesn't care -- I don't fucking know but it SUCKS. It's STUPID and it SUCKS and it ESPECIALLY sucks for the people hurt along the way.

I'm not trying to make any kind of definitive declaration or comment, I just have so much ANGER and fear these past few months and just so much SHIT has happened and I just am so fucking beyond cannot evening anymore with this bullshit WHY DO WE TREAT OTHER HUMAN BEINGS LIKE THIS AS IF MOST OF US DIDN'T DIE OFF IN A PLAGUE IN THE 14th CENTURY YOU'D REALLY THINK THE PEOPLE LEFTOVER WOULD LEARN TO DO BETTER AND APPRECIATE EACH OTHER.

So fuck it I'll make this a voting PSA

PLEASE VOTE

PLEASE VOTE FOR THE PEOPLE WHO AREN'T WANTING TO DESTROY DEMOCRACY

IF YOU CAN VOTE PLEASE HELP OTHERS VOTE

IF YOU CAN'T VOTE YOU CAN STILL HELP, LOOK INTO VOTE FORWARD OR VOLUNTEER TO HELP YOUR OLDER FRIENDS AND FAMILY TO SIGN UP OR OFFER A RIDE OR BABYSITTING OR SOMETHING

PARTICIPATE IN PRIMARIES AND SHIT AND LOCAL ELECTIONS TO TRY TO EFFECT ✨BETTER✨ CHANGE THAN THE OPTIONS BEFORE US RIGHT NOW

I'm just sick of this shit. Fucking do better. FUCK

[cringefailcabitha]

sorry i dont have tumblr (i only use it to stalk cabby art LOL) and idk if youll answer this but i am known as the cabby yapper by my friends so i wanted to bring this up to someone who thinks about her as deeply as me

do you ever like think about how terrifying mephones plan for a season 4 would have been to cabby specifically? out of all of the final 3 she has been hurt by the game the most (with no closure mind you unlike balloon), i think having to go through everything again would genuinely break her. even if shes less misunderstood the game still puts pressure onto her to be a facts machine, a strategist. when shes literally the kindest person ever, trying to comfort silver (despite his constant mistreatment of her), and sacrificing almost every post merge challenge for the sake of somebody else (i.e giving up her inani-mate for yinyang, sacrificing herself in episode 13 to put herself on the line with yinyang even if she was manipulating them out of obligation, AND EPISODE 15 SHE DEFINITELY WOULD HAVE WON IF SHE HAD USED HER FILES and completely foiling blueberrys plan, but she didnt because she cared about bot)

in the episode when shes reading the file, the screen actually starts shaking a little. implying she was absolutely horrified at what she was reading. and she had every single right, especially considering what shes gone through.

the other thing that’s absolutely insane to me is the fact that this information was conveyed to her via a file. aka her disability aid, something she relies on. that mustve been horrifying to see something so person to her used against her in such a way.

sorry i regurgitated a lot of this info from the shut i put on tiktok. im just genuinely crazy about cabby

ALSO UR A CABTUBE TRUTHER IM LITERALLY SO IN LOVE WITH CABTUBE i am lesbian cabbys number one truther and see her shipped with men far too much. but like i was so hoping test tube would at least apologize or something. it irritates me how they can make one sided silvercandle canon but they cant show us anymore one-sided cabtube. just make her blush or something. but tbh it made me emo when test tube (and pb bc they nodded) oraised cabby, it made me genuinely crazy.

also unshout out to everyone bullying cabby this episode genuinely why were half of them so mean please let silver Die slowly and painfully. also if lifering (i hc him and cabby as father and daughter, like u cannot convince me lifering and floory arent her dads) switched up on cabby i will personally take his soul like the grim reaper he will be seeing these hands.

sorry feel free to ignore this!

-🍭

😭 I was for real thinking about that earlier today like hasn’t she been through enough… Yes Cabby is a very competitive person but after everything that happened to her in this season and the fact that she’s Still in a vulnerable place right now I don’t think she would find it particularly enjoyable to not receive a prize and then immediately be thrust into a new season of competition— and as a team leader, no less.

Test Tube thanking her for apologising was,,, weird to me. I literally rolled my eyes. It gave me the impression that she (and Paintbrush) think Cabby *should* be apologising to everyone for making some of them uncomfortable? And I just don’t agree. As polite as it is, I think it’s way overstating her actions. Like… why is it “right” to apologise to the entire jury for her past behaviour making “some of them uncomfortable” pre episode 7 when she had never even worked with half of them when said behaviour was supposedly occurring? It’s so frustrating to me, like… how much smaller does she have to make herself for them to be satisfied? I don’t get it.

And of course, “making them uncomfortable” thing again comes back to her files. It’s basically impossible for her not to internalise the idea that keeping information is bad because she Might get things wrong (which. Is another thing. As far as we’ve seen, her writing is almost always correct, barring Bot which is an obvious outlier, and erroneously attributing Suitcase turning on her alliance in season 2 to Balloon’s manipulation.) In episode 15 too, aka the worst Test Tube episode to me, she says Cabby thinks everyone is just “what she happened to write down” as if Cabby is careless and doesn’t do her due diligence when writing her files. Which to me directly contradicts her calling Cabby’s Fan file “impeccable” and having “so many notes” back in episode 2?

And as for Test Tube’s assertion that Cabby would turn on her the moment she stopped being useful, and that she treated everyone like chess pieces on her little board, it really felt like her jumping to conclusions because of what happened with Fan. Because she has done that to no other member of the Pinkers. And there is way less manipulation on Cabby’s part in the show than Test Tube’s irritation would have it seem.

I’m not sure if the writers intentions were to make Cabby as manipulative as Silver from the beginning, but if it was and that’s why this is all going on, well. Mission status isn’t exactly a success to me— the only manipulation she does is in episode 2, when she tries to get Bot to vote out Fan (and presumably the rest of the team as well), and episode 7, where she makes a big show of approaching Silver about how it would be better for him to stack the ice cream because, knowing him to be lazy and careless, it would increase the odds of him screwing up the challenge and make it easier to vote him out.

I’m at least relieved that Test Tube seems to have been thinking about things whenever Cabby says something self-effacing or seems to be nice, because it gives me hope that she may finally realise she’s been taking it too far and maybe Cabby will get an apology, but the fact that she’s been just sitting on it for like 3 episodes by now is killing me,

[dandyshucks]

rambling about Guz under the cut hsdhgjkl, CW for abuse and (c)ptsd talk as well as discussion of racism

i've hesitated to say anything about his trauma-caused aggression and anger because i fear it'll be misconstrued by ppl (<- tags on that other post that i'm going off of bc i wanna ramble abt it)

he's not Scary or Violent or Mean. i mean maybe other ppl might view him that way, he might come across that way if you don't know him well, but like.... its trauma. if you were physically abused as a child... yeah. youre gonna come out of that with issues that won't be pretty. you're not going to be the Perfect Victim. you are going to have symptoms and reactions and whatnot that are ugly and difficult and upsetting and hard-to-be-around sometimes.

I am really aware and cautious of the stereotype where many men of colour (mainly black men, but this also includes indigenous men and some other men of colour) are portrayed as being Big and Aggressive, so I have avoided getting anywhere near that, especially since I made the decision to change Guz's skintone in my portrayal of him (which I'm not going to get into, at least rn, but that decision was carefully thought out as well for me). So I always get a bit worried that IF I show any of that side of his trauma, it is going to come off the wrong way.

When I look at him being angry and aggressive in any way, I'm coming at it from the perspective of "this is a man who was a child who was abused and beaten, and he's grown up being taught he needs to Fight, that he needs to be scary in order to be safe, and he is very afraid in a way that translates to anger because that's the way he learned to deal with that emotion." And then we (Guz and co) figure out how to work with that, how to start unravelling all the trauma that's packed into that behaviour, how to start unlearning those reactions and begin working on new ways of Being. He's got a safe environment now, where the people he's around genuinely care about him, where he doesn't have to scare the people around him in order to be respected and safe. Plumes and the squad love him, and Junebug loves him, and he doesn't want to hurt any of them. He also doesn't want to continue that cycle of abuse, doesn't want the grunts or anyone else to feel afraid of him like he was afraid of his dad, nor does he want any of the grunts to feel like they have to be aggressive to be safe in the world.

I'm also aware of the fact that I have white skin even if I am indigenous lol, and the little white-skinned partner appearing to be the "uwu soft niceys" one in the relationship with the big "aggressive" man with brown skin is uhhhh a really fucking awful look! really fucked up! And it's not something I'm interested in presenting to the world, even if it's just in this small circle of the internet. That's a really fucked up dynamic to be putting out there without context lmao.

Anyways, so even if Guz has that shit going on, I'm very careful with how I present it and aware of how it might come across, and if I ever step over any lines, people are more than welcome to holler at me and let me know I've fucked up!

Currently, I figure he was working on shit for a while before my self-insert came along (this is not a case of "i will fix you all by myself" because again... my white skin makes it look like white saviorism, plus I do not think thats a very interesting dynamic for me personally anyways lol, you gotta be putting in a bit of work yourself for me to stick around very long and help you out), and then Junebug showing up was just another motivational force to keep working on his shit. Guz has a good group of people around him and Junebug is just kind of a bonus in the situation. He'd be putting in the work either way, but they're just a little extra boost for him.

I think he’ll always have a bit of a tendency to react with the fight instinct rather than flight or freeze in situations where he is genuinely terrified and doesn’t have time to think through a reaction, but all of the rest of it improves. It’s amazing what a person can change about the way their brain is wired with enough time and effort and support!

[newtabfics]

Could I request bff Kohga comforting a reader that got stuck in the depths?

YES BUT LISTEN. I"M GOING TO HAVE TO WRITE A FULL FIC FOR THIS. BUT HERE IS A SNIPPET OF WHAT YOU CAN EXPECT. It's also been brought to my attention that there is a severe lack of Kohga fics in general...I don't do NSFW for him bc I just can't see him outside what would literally be my best friend but also I'm just him.

She squeaked as she ran, gasping for air as her lungs burned. Looking up, she could see a group of men near what appeared to be an abandoned mine.

It didn't matter. She hurried to them, yelling out for help. They quickly made to fight...except for the larger man. He yelped and gestured her to their group quickly before vanishing and appearing suddenly in front of her, grabbing her and pulling her behind him. She watched him throw up a shield quickly to block the attack from the strange monster. She recognized a Moblin any day of the week, but this thing was different.

It stumbled and then fell as arrows littered into its chest before she was grabbed. In a flume of smoke, she was suddenly in the bright area and surrounded by the men that saved her.

"How did you get down here?!" Kohga asked frantically, checking her for injury. "How long have you been down here?!"

"I don't know, Koh!" She sobbed, hugging him. "Oh goddesses, I'm so happy to see you. This is freaking scary!"

He sighed and patted her head as he looked over, seeing his men quickly look away from their moment. He was grateful for it. Not because he was embarrassed, oh no. He wanted only to spare his friend from humiliation given the adventurer she was.

"You need to rest," He sighed, looking around before lifting her. She squeaked but clung onto him. He looked around before taking in one of the newer members. He quickly took note of his build...then his right arm. "You. Come on. I need you specifically to guard her."

Y/N sniffled and blinked, eying the recruit that followed quietly. "Koh, is he...okay?"

"He is. He'll make sure you're safe. He'll even take you back up later when you're ready before he returns." He glanced over in his direction.

Link only nodded in agreement under his mask.

"You don't have to get scary for me, Kohga."

"Yes. Yes, I do. You're nowhere near terrifying."

"I-I can be scary!" She squeaked, glaring at him. She could see his grin under the fabric as he carried her to their campsite. "I'm not hurt. I can walk."

"And how long were you running? That thing was alone. They travel in packs. You are resting, Y/N. And you're telling me how you got down here after you eat too."