#if ur gross at all i Will Block
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martian-martian-martian · 8 months ago
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theres nothing better after a long day of actually pertinent real life responsibilities than relaxing online with a nice, familiar fandom flame war.
apparently believing canon shouldnt be completely actively ignored, especially to the detriment of BIPOC representation, for the sake of a cringe ship is a controversial take.
i dont know what i expected, its always the same people actually. they tend to swarm to the same shit, just different fandoms.
im not saying i presume every vaultghoul person is a racist creep… i just probably need proof lmao.
because rn yall look like basic bitches who find it very convenient to push characters of color completely out of the way and pretend they don’t exist. 🤷🏻‍♀️
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milkstoner · 5 months ago
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I don't have an insta 😔
I do have to respect that honestly.
#instagram is one of the worse social media apps i use it only to post my own photography and scroll on my fyp which is well curated somehow#btw if you’re trying to date dont communicate on instagram#exchange numbers. keep that boundary and keep it sacred#dont let whoever ur trying to date see your social media presence#even worse if their dms are on silent who tf are you and whose dms are you trying to avoid?surely not mine#how are you going to set up a date with me when your insta DMs are on silent. you havent responded to me and its been 6 hours the day of!!!#how is it 3 pm and its your day off and we were supposed to have a date but youre acting like youre beyoncé omg text me the fuck back#plus you haven’t texted me two whole days#and im mad about it cause that’s a very attractive long haired peruvian man i mean wow! fuck this#had to block cause even if there wasn’t any commitment im not letting myself be disrespected the fuck#anyway if a man asks for your Snapchat specifically he is a serial killer and he will murder you OR he is twenty years old or younger#if a man asks for your TikTok he thinks youre in high school. we all are too classy for TikTok#TikTok is the temu of apps just trashy altogether. you open and there’s aliexpress-reminiscent ads…ew…I’ve only posted a few times#but every time i open the app i feel like I’ll catch lice it just feels unclean#we talk about twitter and how ass it is to use which is fair but tiktok is worse i mean…UI nightmare#a man that uses TikTok is off the deep end you can’t save him#he’s frying up his attention span. meaning he wont be able to focus on you as he should because you are a queen#instead he’ll think about skibidi toilet or some shit does anyone know what that is?i dont#imagine kissing a man having no idea he has that fucking ‘oh no oh no oh nonono’ audio stuck in his head#a man should read a book and even then that should be fucking controlled#im reading Freud right now and its torture. tbf it does happen to be sexuality theories#girl its fucking gross#academia is cooked cause in what world do i get creds for reading the most wack books in the history of ever?#I’ve read 11 books and half of them were boring#this Freud included and its repulsive to read and not even true.#why is it 2024 and im still being taught untrue info just cause old man from old times wrote it#i could clear freud. he literally was a cokehead#in the end he’s a man like the rest of them and if you show him TikTok his brain cells will be cooked#so who won?
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benetnvsch · 1 year ago
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(also real talk cuz ive been getting more bongostraydogs followers,, id appreciate it if u do not follow / unfollow / block me if u call urself/identify as a pr0shipper or ship things like 0dazai or fvkuran. obvs I can't (and entirely don't care to) 'police' what people post/like but I can control my own experience here so f u do follow or even interact w my posts and I notice it ur just gonna be blocked. these just personally make me very uncomfortable cuz of trauma so this is less of a request and more just an explanation why u may suddenly blocked after interacting ough-)
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gradelstuff · 1 year ago
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Is there any point to using all the Villain ao3 tags for your villain hate fic that intends to kill all of the villain characters by the end
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raccoonspooky · 2 years ago
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if youre a minor and i find that you follow me im blocking you!
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pizzasteveofficial · 2 years ago
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I wanna go on record saying I very much dislike Nickacado. He is loud, annoying, very stupid, and the video of him eating Chicken McNuggets from McDonalds and wasting all of it for his stupid gross tempertantrum tirades or whatever the fuck kinda toxic bullshit him and Orlin do made me so viscerally upset and angry while I was high, I don’t think I can forgive him he crossed a line so personal to me that he ain’t comin back
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moonbunnie7 · 1 year ago
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I don’t think I can fully articulate the grief and pain that I feel in my heart about it stupid friggen masks and society conversation I want to actually go out and meet new friends and date but I can’t get over how so many people don’t want to forget that covid still exists/happened or don’t wear one when they r sick or just feel off and I’m just so deeply disgusted and disturbed by the human race how ignorant people choose to be; u can choose to not wear it all the time but at least wear it in mass public spaces and when u feel off….and yes I know I shouldn’t be overgeneralizing but at this point I don’t know if I’m ever going to take it off? Yes I fucking hate wearing it but also I hate people tell me to take it off like honestly fuck off??? Going out and being the only one masked sucks but I’m just to stuck in feeling so grossed out and torn but I know imma wear it anyways
FUCK
My mom said if I wanna live to my 80s or 90s keep it on but If I don’t I might reach 40 and realize I have health problems on the horizon that I can’t escape and this shit ain’t fair for real
Nothing is fair tho I guess illness and “freedom” don’t go hand in hand
It is also my choice to stay home and rot bc I’m fearful of someone spreading their illness to me or treat me horribly it’s a me problem but anyways
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landoughnut · 2 months ago
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Mine All Mine
♡ masterlist - request!
♡ pairing - oscar piastri x fem!reader (fc - hailee steinfeld)
♡ summary - (request :) oscar obsessing over his girlfriend on the internet!
♡ warnings - horny/simp oscar, crack, some fluff, some cursing, use of y/n
♡ w/c & a/n - smau | thank you so so much for requesting!! i hope you enjoy lovely xx
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oscarpiastri HEYYYY LOVEEEE
yourusername HIIIIII SWEETHEART
oscarpiastri wow wow WOW 🤩 liked by yourusername
username she's so 😍
oscarpiastri tell me about it 😩
danielricciardo AUSSIE AUSSIE AUSSIE
oscarpiastri OI OI OI
yourusername my fav aussies 🥹
landonorris lets gooo 🔥
yourusername cant wait to see you black out drunk tonight 🫡
oscarpiartri i am NOT getting thrown up on by him again. you can walk his drunk ass back to the car this time
landonorris I SAID I WAS SORRY 😣
oscarpiastri sorry doesn't heal my trauma
yourusername stop being dramatic oscar 😭
oscarpiastri you're right sorry love 🥺
zendaya BEAUTYYY
yourusername SAYS YOU 😘
oscarpiastri you're right MY girlfriend is such a beauty 🥵
zendaya oh hell nah 😭 stay mad i had her first
oscarpiatri go back to your british boy 👹
yourusername ladies ladies there's enough of me to go around 😎
oscarpiastri UGHHH ON MY KNEESSSSS 😻🙇
yourusername later babe 😉
oscarpiastri 👅
pierregasly EW YALL FREAKS
oscarpiastri 😺
alex_albon I MISS THE CUTE AND SHY OSCAR
oscarpiastri you think im cute?🥺
alex_albon ...
mclaren guys..........
username PICK ME CHOOSE ME LOVE ME
oscarpiastri no no and no ☺️ she picked, chose, and loves ME 😂
oscarpiastri YOU ARE SO HOT AND SEXY AND FINE AND PRETTY
yourusername NO YOU AREEE 🫵🏻🥰
oscarpiastri HEHEHEHE IM BLUSHING
landonorris can confirm ✅
oscarpiastri my pants are kinda tight rn
charles_leclerc AYOOO GROSS 🤮
carlossainz55 I DID NOT NEED TO KNOW THAT EW
landonorris STOP OMG IM RIGHT NEXT TO U
yourusername HELP ME LMAOAOAOAO
mclaren no words.
yourusername close your eyes admin 😶😨
username IM CRYING OSCAR TMIII
oscarpiastri im just a boy with a hot gf 🥺🎀
username its okay king im with you 🧱
oscarpiastri you are disgusting wtf blocked 🤢
arianagrande MY GIRL 💋
yourusername ARI 💗
oscarpiastri *cough* MY girl *cough*
mclaren the prettiest ever 🧡 liked by yourusername
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oscarpiastri HOLY MOLY liked by yourusername
oscarpiastri PHEW WEE MAMA liked by yourusername
oscarpiastri IM DROOLINGGGG LOVE 🤤
yourusername I LOVE YOU OSC
oscarpiastri I LOVE YOU MOST ❤️
charles_leclerc red for ferrari?
oscarpiastri 🧡* never.
scuderuaferrrari damn it 😕
mclaren thats our boy 😁
lewishamilton loved the movie!!
yourusername im so glad !! 🥰
tomholland2013 andrew told me to comment that he loved working with you!! and i also think the movie was amazing 😊
yourusername thank you to both of you!! im happy you liked it tom :)
zendaya WE* loved it, you ate babes
yourusername just date me already z 🛐
oscarpiastri hello?? no wtf
zendaya you cant come between our love aussie boy
oscarpiastri maybe not, but ik smt else I can come in between
maxverstappen1 LOG OFFF
georgerussell63 SOMEONE TAKE THIS KIDS PHONE AWAY
yukitsunod0511 im telling a trusted adult 😟
landonorris IM TELLING YOUR MOM
oscarpiastri NO PLEASE
mclaren two strikes. one more and your out.
oscarpiastri since when is f1 baseball
username YOU ARE SO GORGEOUS
oscarpiastri GORGEOUSLY MINE
username chill bro no ones stealing her ☺️
oscarpiastri IM SO PROUD OF YOU DARLING
yourusername thank you love 💕🥹
username THE MOVIE WAS SO GOOD
yourusername yay im so happy you enjoyed it!! ❤️
username OMG ILY
oscarpiastri yall wouldn't believe how easy that dress was to remove
yourusername OML OSCAR NO
carlossainz55 STOPPPPPPP
alex_albon ENOUGH
yukitsunoda0511 m-ma pick me up i'm scared
yourusername NOOO MY BBY YUKI IM SORRY 🙁
landonorris why are you always talking abt ur adult time online
oscarpiastri IF YALL DONT WANT TO SEE THEN GET OFF MY GFS PAGE 🙄
mclaren and thats strike three, my office in 30 - zak
landonorris oooo you're in trouble 😂🫵🏻
kimkardashian gorgeous
yourusername 💋
emmawatson beautiful girl 💞
yourusername coming from the definition of beauty herself 🥹
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yourusername OMG OSCAR 🥹🥹🥹 liked by oscarpiastri
yourusername IM GONNA CRY
oscarpiastri dont cry love im not there to kiss the tears away ☹️
username 🥹 them >>>>>>>
yourusername I LOVE YOU SO MUCH 🙁
oscarpiastri I LOVE YOU FOREVER AND EVER ♾️
yourusername you are prettier than all the sunsets
oscarpiastri i just shed a few tears
landonorris can confirm ✅
charles_leclerc are my eyes deciving me?
maxverstappen1 a... nice caption??
carlossainz55 very pg... so refreshing
username when i pull up to the who loves y/n most contest but oscar piastri is also there 🚪🏃💨
oscarpiastri easiest win of my life
yourusername osc love 🥹
username AWHHHHHHH
username ladies get yourself a man who loves you like how oscar loves y/n liked by oscarpiastri
lewishamilton my favorite couple 💙 liked by oscarpiastri
username she's so stunning 😍
oscarpiastri righttt 🥺
yourusername i like the view
oscarpiastri you do?
yourusername yes
oscarpiastri you're my best view
yourusername nah
username LMAOAOAOAOOAAO I FORGOT ABOUT THAT MEME
username ICONIC
tchalamet wow
username commenting this on OSCARS post is wild
username bros brave for that
username 1, 2, oscars coming for you 👀
landonorris THE AUDACITY
oscarpiastri i see you little french boy.
oscarpiastri if i see another comment or like from you ill hit you with my car so fast you'll go flying back to your little chocolate factory.
mclaren for legal reasons this IS a joke 😅
yourusername TIMOTHÉE IM SO SORRY DONT MIND HIM IM A BIG FAN OF YOU 🫶
tchalamet 😅 i'm scared to say thank you
oscarpiastri good 🙃
username LMAOAOOAOOAOAAO TIMMYS TRAUMATIZED
oscarpiastri ugh guys she's just JDNBGEBGW
oscarpiastri you guys dont even get it
oscarpiastri i wake up and see her and just 🥲 thank the lord
username AWHHHHHHHHH
alex_albon i didn't know he could be so sweet
yourusername IM GOING TO CRY ILYSM.
oscarpiastri and i love you more 💞
username i'm only following oscar for the y/n content
oscarpiastri thats so valid.
zendaya same.
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kwanisms · 2 months ago
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Kinktober 「10:14」 — j.wonwoo
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» seventeen menu | wonwoo menu | kinktober masterlist «
➮ vampire!Wonwoo × fem!Reader wc: 3.8k summary: Y/N has always avoided sex during her period in the past. Not because she found it gross but because her partners did. Wonwoo is different. Wonwoo loves it. Wonwoo also happens to be a vampire so he might be a bit biased. genres/themes/au: angst/fluff/smut; supernatural, horror, thriller; non idol au, monster idol au warnings: adult dialogue, female reader, supernatural and horror themes, vampires, mentions of: food consumption, blood & blood consumption (vampire, remember?), periods and menstruation, vampiric powers & abilities; sexual content (18+ mdni), see smut warnings under the cut! taglist has been moved to reblogs join my taglists! kinktober taglist is closed! Strikethrough means I cannot tag you.  MINORS WILL BE BLACKLISTED & BLOCKED. AGELESS BLOGS WILL ALSO BE BLOCKED.
a/n: i've already stated in the smut warnings but if blood bothers you, DO NOT READ THIS. if period sex bothers you, DO NOT READ THIS. This is filthy, nasty, and i don't care lol i've done my part to warn those who don't want to see this. to those of you that do read this, i see you and i'm kissing ur forehead. wonwoo is a vampire, blood does no phase him at all. this is for my bestie Sky cause this is her main ult so, enjoy this, my love! as always, this is a work of fiction and all characters are not reflective of their respective irl counterparts. for entertainment purposes only.
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smut warnings: teratophilia (aka monsterfucking), bloodplay (if it makes you uncomfortable, LOOK AWAY. i’m not responsible for your media consumption. I’m warning you now. If anything to do with blood makes you uncomfortable, this fic is not for you!), period sex (again. Look away if you don’t like it.), oral (m receiving, f receiving), fingering (f receiving), unprotected sex (use condoms. Wonwoo doesn’t need to cause this ain’t twilight), use of pet names (darling, baby, etc.), soft dom!Wonwoo, sub!Reader, I think that’s everything but if I missed something, let me know! kinks: Bloodplay + period sex dialogue prompt: ❛❛ Aw darling, I almost believe you. ❜❜
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“Are you sure there isn’t anything else?” your boyfriend asked over the phone. “All I have here are pads, chocolate, sliced pepperonis, and root beer. Do you need a heating pad or some pain relief?”
You let out a soft laugh as you leaned back against your pillows. “No,” you answered. “I have the heating pad and I’ve already taken enough ibuprofen to knock out a child,” you continued. “I just need those things.” Silence fell over you as you adjusted the heating pad that was tucked under your blanket.
“And maybe you,” you added in an undertone. You heard a deep chuckle on the other side of the phone. “Well, let me check out and then once I’m there, I’m all yours, baby,” Wonwoo answered. “Okay, please hurry,” you said as another cramp hit, a sharp pain deep in your abdomen making you wince and whimper in pain.
Wonwoo frowned as he heard you whimper. He hated seeing and hearing you in pain, it made his non beating heart hurt. “Can you open a window?” he asked as he headed towards the self checkout. “Yeah.. I think so. Why?” you asked, confusion in your voice.
“So I can just come in without bothering with the front door,” Wonwoo answered as he started to set his items down, scanning them while holding the phone to his ear. “Jeon Wonwoo, you are not flying into my open window on the twentieth story! You will use the lobby elevator like everyone else,” you scolded. 
Wonwoo held back a laugh as a smirk crossed his face as he deposited his scanned items into a plastic bag. “Unless you want everyone to know you’re a vampire, I suggest you act like a person and walk through the front door like all guests do.” As he finished scanning, he tucked his phone between his ear and shoulder as he fished out his wallet.
“Alright, alright,” he said as he pulled out his card, holding it over the reader until the light blinked and the reader beeped. He slid the card back into his wallet, stuffing it back in his pocket as he grabbed his phone and bag, nodding towards the store attendant and making a move for the exit.
“I promise I will walk through the front door, use the elevator, and walk to your door like every other normal, boring human,” he whispered as he exited the shop onto the sidewalk. “Good,” you replied, sounding pleased. “Let yourself in,” you added quickly. “You know the code.”
The walk to your place was only ten minutes for him from the shop where he’d picked up the items you requested and then some. The thought of flying to your window and entering your apartment that way was even more appealing as he forced himself to walk the same pace as those around him. It would have saved so much time but he did promise.
The elevator ride up was slow but thankfully empty and when he reached your floor, he walked to your door at the end of the hall, punching in the code on the number pad which beeped and he let himself in, opening the door and shutting it behind him.
Your apartment was cool, mimicking the cool temperatures outside over the misty city. He walked further into the apartment after removing his shoes. He walked into the kitchen, setting the bag on the counter and unpacking the things he bought. As he put the bag away, he heard a small whine coming from your room. He walked down to your room in a split second and carefully pushed open the door, peering into the room.
The curtains had been drawn, leaving only a sliver of light coming into the room. The TV was on, some show you weren’t paying attention to playing in the background. On the middle of the bed, wrapped in blankets and surrounded by a small mountain of plushies was a lump which he could correctly assume was you. He let himself into the room, crossing to the edge of your bed and removing his coat which he threw on the chair in the corner.
He gently climbed onto the bed, the movement making your body dip with the mattress.
You turned slowly, looking up at him, only your face visible from a small hole in your blanket burrito. Wonwoo let out a chuckle as he laid down behind you, sliding an arm under your entire body and pulled you back against him. “You feeling okay, sweetheart?” he asked softly.
“I’m fine,” you grumbled but he could tell you felt anything but fine.
“Aw, darling,” he said softly, a hint of amusement to his voice. “I almost believe you.”
After a moment, he felt you shake your head no and he only tightened his grip. “It hurts,” you said in a broken voice. “I know,” he murmured, lifting his head and moving a hand to pull the blanket back to expose your head. “I know it hurts, baby,” he repeated, pressing a kiss to the back of your head. “And you can’t take any more medicine?” You shook your head again.
“I’ve already taken so much. It’s just not working,” you cried softly. Wonwoo grimaced as your body jerked in pain, doubling over. “Let’s get you something to eat,” he murmured, pressing another kiss to the back of your head. “No,” you answered, tucking your head into the blankets. Wonwoo chuckled as he sat up, pulling you into his lap so you were on your back, looking up at him.
“I’m sure you’ll feel better after you eat something,” he said, gently caressing your cheek. “Come on,” he said as he helped you sit up, unwrapping the blankets. You whined as the cool air hit your exposed skin. “You can wrap back up once you get off the bed,” Wonwoo said as he got to his feet, holding your blanket. You scrambled up to join him and he quickly wrapped the blanket around you, enveloping you in its warmth.
“I got all your favorites,” he said as he guided you to the door and down the hall to the living area. You climbed up into one of the stools at the island as he walked into the kitchen, turning on the overhead light. You looked at the spread with wide eyes. “You really went all out,” you said softly.
Wonwoo smiled, walking over to the sink and turning on the faucet to wash his hands. He then moved to open one of your cupboards, grabbing one of your pots, filling it with water and placing it on the stove, turning the burner on. “I was thinking army stew,” he said as he moved to the fridge, peering inside to see what you had, grabbing a package of tiny sausages, a couple eggs, some cheese, and veggies.
You watched as he worked, cutting veggies faster than your eyes could keep up. He added the soup base for the ramen as well as a few other sauce items before adding the sausages, some spam he found in the pantry, fishcake, and the veggies. As those boiled, he cracked the eggs, adding them to a bowl and whisking them with chopsticks.
He added the noodles, cheese and carefully poured the egg mixture in once the noodles softened and placed a lid over it. While it finished cooking, he opened the convenience store tteokbokki, adding the sauce packet and water before placing it in the microwave.
Once everything was done, he moved you to the table, setting up the hotplate before bringing over the pan of stew and setting it down on the hotplate. He finished setting the table, grabbing something to drink and set those down as well before sitting with you. He filled your bowl first before serving himself and you shook your head. 
“You didn’t have to do all this,” you said softly. “I would have been fine with just some convenience store ramen.” Wonwoo smiled as you took a bite, eyes fluttering shut as you enjoyed the taste. “That right there is exactly why I did it,” he said, picking up a piece of spicy rice cake and eating it. “Seeing you happy and enjoying things makes it all worth it.”
After you had your fill and the pan was cleared, you indulged in some chocolate before returning to your room to watch some TV with Wonwoo, curled up into his side. The food had made you feel better but the cramps were back and you kept whining as every contraction made you press your face into your boyfriend’s chest.
Wonwoo kept one arm around you, holding you against him while he watched the TV screen. He wasn’t really paying attention, not when he could hear every little sound of pain you made, felt every time your heart rate kicked up or the jerk of your body as the pain became too unbearable for you.
“You know,” he said softly, rubbing your shoulder soothingly. “Orgasms can help alleviate menstrual cramps.” You lifted your head to look at him through squinted eyes. “I’m just sayin’!” he said with a shrug. You buried your face in his chest again. “Isn’t that, like, gross though?” you asked, your voice muffled. “Is what gross?” Wonwoo asked.
You lifted your head. “Period sex. Aren’t most guys, like, grossed out by that?”
Wonwoo stared at you dumbfounded. Did you really just say that to him of all people?
“Babe,” he said softly. “I don’t know if you know this,” he started. “But I’m a vampire. Blood does not bother me in the slightest.” Your eyes widened comically. “Oh, right,” you said softly. “But like, that much blood? Wouldn’t that send you into a feeding frenzy or something?”
Wonwoo’s laughter resonated around the room as he threw his head back. “I’m not a shark! I’m a vampire,” he replied, chest bouncing as he laughed. “I can control myself a lot more than you think. Vampires aren’t animals. We don’t smell blood and just go feral,” he continued.
Your cheeks burned as he dispelled your assumptions and you suddenly felt very bad about judging him in that regard. “Sorry,” you said softly. Wonwoo pressed a kiss to your forehead. “For what?” he asked. “Unless you’ve dated other vampires, I don’t think that’s something you would rightfully know. I’m not upset, baby. It’s just a silly notion that movies and television have instilled in the populace.”
Silence fell over the two of you, only the sound of the TV playing softly in the background. “I’d like to help,” he said suddenly. “I’d like to help you feel better and if giving you an orgasm helps, I’m not gonna complain.” Your cheeks burned as you processed his words. “Won’t it get messy?” you asked, your voice meek. Wonwoo kissed the top of your head before getting up and disappearing for a moment.
When he returned, it was with a few of your old red towels. Ones you’d stained in the past when dying your hair at home. “I’m sure you won’t mind if these get stained?” he asked. You shook your head, watching him move to set the towels on the bed before he disappeared again, quick as lightning. He returned with a container of wipes which he set on the bed side table.
“Up,” he said as he grabbed the towels. You scrambled up and watched as he placed the towels down, overlapping them. “Put your blanket over there so you don’t get blood on it,” he instructed, pointing to the chair in the corner. You did as he said and then turned back to face the bed. “C’mere,” he said, holding his hand out.
You walked around the bed, taking his hand, letting out a giggle as he pulled you against him, cupping your cheek and pulling you into a soft kiss. “Do you trust me?” he asked softly, lips ghosting over yours. You nodded in response as his hands moved, sliding down to your hips and pulling you towards him as his lips met yours again, tongue swiping over your bottom lip.
Your lips parted, moaning as you felt his tongue slip into your mouth, caressing your own tongue. His hands continued to roam up and down your body, squeezing your sides, the curve of your ass, cupping your chest. You could feel the heat starting to pool in your belly as you felt his semi-hard cock press against your stomach. 
Wonwoo pulled back, breaking the kiss to turn you around to face the bed. His hands fell to your hips, pulling your ass back against his growing erection with a groan. “Get on the bed,” he breathed, lips trailing down your neck to your shoulder. 
You carefully climbed onto the bed, positioning yourself in the middle of the towels as your boyfriend removed his sweater and pants, leaving on his underwear and white tee as he crawled onto the bed. He pushed the hem of your shirt up, kissing your exposed stomach up towards your chest.
You let out a gasp as you felt his tongue swirl around your nipple, his mouth claiming it as he teased the bud. You ran your fingers through his hair, head falling back against the pillows. Wonwoo pushed your shirt up past your chest, his hand stabbing and kneading your breast. He pulled away, tongue and lips repeating the same thing on your other nipple before he had you sit up so he could remove your top.
You laid back against the pillows as he kissed down your chest and stomach. He glanced up at you with dark eyes as he started to tug your shorts and underwear down, discarding them and spreading your legs. The smell of blood invaded his senses as he glanced down, seeing the small string of your tampon. He would deal with that later though.
“If you want me to stop at any point,” he said softly, looking up at you. “Just tell me.” You nodded as he lightly raked his nails up and down your thighs. “Nothing is off limits for me,” he explained. “Blood does not bother me, I’ve told you this.” You nodded once more, laying naked under his heated gaze.
You watched as he grabbed the back of his shirt, pulling it off over his head, ruffling his hair in the process. His red eyes studied you as he tossed it aside. Wordlessly, he leaned back over, licking the tips of his fingers before taking your lips in a searing kiss as his wet fingers pressed against your clit, immediately starting to work against it.
You moaned into his mouth as he rubbed slowly, lightly flicking and pinching your clit. Your arousal had started to pool, allowing his fingers to glide much smoother and faster. Tension started to build, heat rising in your body. Wonwoo pulled back, eyes meeting yours. “I’m going to remove this,” he said, fingers gently pulling on the string of your tampon. “Okay?”
You nodded, keeping your body relaxed as he started to pull slowly, removing the plug from your body. Once it was gone, he threw it in the waste bin between your bed and the side table. His fingers were back on you in an instant, rubbing your clit in a circular motion.
Your eyes fluttered shut as your hips started to move, chasing his fingers. You felt his fingers move lower and lower until they slid inside your cunt. You let out a groan as he curled his fingers, keeping his eyes on your face as he moved slowly, pumping his fingers in and out of you, a soft and slight squelching noise making your cheeks burn.
“From now on,” Wonwoo said as he curled his fingers against your walls again. “Don’t wear tampons around me. Just wear pads.” You couldn’t respond as his fingers moved faster, coaxing your body closer and closer to an orgasm.
Just before you came, he stopped, pulling his fingers out of you. “Wonwoo!” you whined as he smirked at you. Looking up at him, you watched as he brought his blood covered fingers closer to his face. “Here,” you said, trying to grab the container of wipes but let out a gasp as he instead stuck his fingers in his mouth, cleaning them with his tongue instead. “Wonwoo!” you admonished in total shock.
Wonwoo gave you a smile before he maneuvered down your body until his face was level with your cunt. You propped yourself up on your elbows. “No fucking way,” you said but your words fell short as you felt his tongue lick against your slit, a deep groan rumbling from his chest as he tasted your blood. The tip of his tongue dipped into your entrance before sliding up to your clit and you fell back against the bed with a moan as he started to lick, tease, and suck the sensitive nub.
The lewd slurping sounds, coupled with the fact that you were freely bleeding onto his tongue had your cheeks burning from embarrassment but you couldn’t deny it was also extremely erotic in a way. Your vampire boyfriend, who was not grossed out by blood, was more than willing to finger you, eat you out, and fuck you while you were on your period.
To say you hit the jackpot was an understatement.
Wonwoo felt the same way. Being allowed to taste you during this time of the month that you normally kept private from him was intoxicating and he knew that this would become your new normal routine.
You let out a whine as your orgasm drew closer and closer, back arching off the towels as Wonwoo flattened his tongue against your clit. Your hips tried to move, chasing the feeling of his tongue against you but he held you down, instead suckling on your clit until you finally came with a moan of his name, fingers tangling in his hair.
Wonwoo continued to lap slowly at your cunt until you shuddered, tugging gently on his hair and breathlessly begging him to stop. He pulled back and you stared in both shock and awe as his blood covered lips as he licked them slowly, maintaining eye contact with you.
You moaned as you watched him lick as much of the blood from his face as he could until he grabbed the container of wipes, pulling one out and wiping the areas of his face he couldn’t reach. He tossed the used tissue away and quickly removed his underwear, pushing the fabric down until his cock sprang free. He kicked them off the rest of the way before moving between your thighs.
“You don’t have to – hng!” you let out a moan as he pushed into your hole easily, the blood and your arousal mixing together to create the best possible lubricant. Any spasming and muscle contractions your uterus had been in the process of making ceased as his cock filled your cunt in one motion.
Wonwoo didn’t even need to give you time to adjust as your walls welcomed his cock instantly. He started to rut into you immediately, hips giving you a few testing thrusts before he really set into a hard and heavy pace. “F-fuck,” you gasped, nails digging into his back as he snapped his hips against yours.
“Feel good?” Wonwoo asked in a deep voice, a hint of amusement in his tone. You nodded eagerly, eyes rolling back as he started to pound into you, the sound of his skin hitting yours filling the room with an undertone of his cock entering your wet cunt.
“I knew it would,” Wonwoo breathed as he grabbed your thigh, pushing it up so he could angle his thrusts to hit the soft gummy spot that had you crying out in pleasure. He didn’t give a damn if your neighbors complained. He loved it when you screamed for him. When he made you feel so good that you cried out in pleasure.
“We’re doing this every time you’re on your period,” he grunted with effort as he slammed into you. “Gonna fuck you every night if I have to just to keep the cramps away.” Your fingers curled into his hair as you held onto him tighter, the leg that wasn’t being held up wrapping around his waist.
“Won-oo,” you mumbled, your grip on his hair tightening. “M’gonna cum.” Wonwoo pushed your thigh against your side, ramming into you, the tip of his cock barely brushing your cervix as he helped you chase your high, your own hips bucking up to meet his thrusts. “Fuck,” he growled. “Cum for me, baby. Show me out wet you can really get.”
You came immediately, crying out in pure bliss as your walls clenched around his cock as he fucked you through your orgasm before chasing his own. His thrusts grew more erratic, wild and sloppy as your cum and blood mixed, making sloshing sounds as he frantically fucked you. “Ah shit,” he groaned, head burying into your shoulder. “I’m gonna cum, fuck!”
You let out a cry of pain as you felt his sharp teeth sink into the skin of your shoulder as he came, sinking his entire cock into you as his load exploded, releasing a stream of thick milky cum into your bloody cunt. A mixture of the fluid spilled out of you, falling onto the towels under you as Wonwoo sucked from the fresh wound in your shoulder.
He pulled back, murmuring an apology as he licked over the holes created by his teeth. “That’ll heal,” he added as he moved to the other side of your neck, burying his face in your neck. You wrapped your arms around him as he gave you a small couple thrusts, fucking his cum deeper into you. “I’ll help you clean,” he added before you could complain about the mess. “Just let me stay like this for a bit.
Clean up was a lot easier than you expected. Wonwoo carried you to the shower, hopping in with you for a bit and helping you wash off, making sure to wash away any cum that spilled out of you. He then got out, drying off and dressing at lightning speed while you finished. He threw the soiled towels and sheets in the wash, placing new ones down before you got out of the shower.
As he requested, you didn’t put another tampon in, instead lining your panties with the pads he picked up for you as you dressed. You pulled on a sweatshirt and shorts, leaving your bra off. Something comfortable and easy for him to remove.
“You know,” he said as you settled on the bed next to him, wrapped up in the blankets and watching the TV at low volume.
“Just in case the cramps come back.”
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©️ kwanisms 2024 | all works on this blog are protected under copyright. Do not repost, continue, or translate my works. All graphics made by me.
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landitolover · 1 year ago
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𝒔𝒂𝒚 𝒅𝒐𝒏’𝒕 𝒈𝒐, in which charles isn’t the best boyfriend.. ౨ৎ charles x famous!reader
warnings- toxic charles, cheating, reader is love-dumb… !
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y/n 💋
charles what the fuck
tell me it isn’t true??
who is she
cha 🤍
baby it isn’t true
i swear, i love you
she came onto me
y/n 💋
are you sure
cha 🤍
yes, my love
i promise you
y/n 💋
come over?
cha 🤍
i’ll be there in ten
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Liked by charles_leclerc, alexademie, maxverstappen1, and 1,092,299 others
yourusername 🤍.
tagged charles_leclerc
View all 6,209 comments
user oh this man has no shame at all 💀
user yn…. 🌝
user girl pls run as fast as u can
user no queen you’re too good for him 😭😭😭😭
user yncharles nation how do we feel
→ user uhm TERRIBLE
→ user poor girl ☹️
→ user nah she definitely knows.
charles_leclerc mon coeur 🩶.
→ user …..
→ user he gave me the eww…
alexademie gorgeous 🤍
→ alexademie he’s there too ig…
→ yourusername 🫶🏻 ily
landonorris 🤨🤨
→ user even lando confused 😭
→ user bro keep charles in line
→ alex_albon me too lando…
lilymhe my girl 🤍🤍
→ yourusername 👩🏻‍❤️‍💋‍👩🏻👩🏻‍❤️‍💋‍👩🏻
maxverstappen1 pretty :)
→ yourusername thank you
→ user SHOOT YO SHOT MAX!!
→ user mr steal your girl 🙏🏼 save her
lilyrose_depp 😍😍
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landito
yn are you okay
y/n
uh, yeah? why
alexander albon.
be so fr
charles???
y/n
oh
it was nothing, she came onto him
he loves me guys
landito
whatever you say, yn..
alexander albon.
stay safe queen!
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Liked by charles_leclerc, landonorris, lilymhe, alexademie and 1,249,298 others
yourusername paris
tagged charles_leclerc
View all 6,292 comments
user this is so sad seeing how much she loves him
→ user fr and he’s out there cheating ????
user babe he hasn’t posted u in months why are you still posting him!!! 😭😭
user u are better than this queen 😪
user OPEN UR EYES BITCH
user she’s so strong
→ user not strong enough to leave him :///
landonorris sooo cute 😃
→ user i can hear the sarcasm
→ user LMFAOO
alex_albon yeah stay away from paris…
→ user SPEAK UR TRUTH KING
charles_leclerc ❤️
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y/n 💋
chaaa, do you wanna come over?
cha 🤍
I can’t
sorry, chérie.
i’m out with friends
y/n 💋
nono it’s fine
have fun!
i love you ❤️
Read 20:22
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Liked by alex_albon, lilymhe, charles_leclerc, landonorris and 1,293,293 others
yourusername time away!! with my favorites 🫶🏻
tagged lilymhe, alex_albon
View all 4,199 comments
user break up with your bf now xx
user too pretty for him
user 🙏🏼 a weekend without ch*rles
landonorris glad to see it!
→ yourusername 😃
lilymhe IT WAS SO FUN HANGING WITH U ❤️
→ yourusername 🤍🤍 love you sm
alex_albon i look gross in that pic
→ georgerussell63 nothing new mate
charles_leclerc so pretty mon amore
→ user the audacity this man has
→ user 🤺🤺🤺
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Liked by lilymhe, alex_albon, landonorris, and 29 others
yourprivate when he’s making out with yet another girl 😂! idk what happened because i tried giving him my all 😂😂
View all 8 comments
lilymhe leave him please
→ yourprivate 😂😂 I can’t
lilymhe i don’t want u to be even more sad ☹️
alex_albon FUCK MEN!!!!
landonorris yn u are better than this
→ yourprivate am i though…
georgerussell63 he don’t know what to do with allat!!
→ lilymhe fr!! yn is too good for his ass
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y/n 💋
what’s her name.
cha 🤍
what?
y/n 💋
her name
the girl you were kissing, charles
cha 🤍
baby
i was drunk
y/n 💋
don’t ‘baby’ me
and you WERENT drunk charles
what did i do wrong?
cha 🤍
nothing i swear
y/n 💋
I must’ve done something wrong
if you cheated on me TWICE
you probably cheated more than that.
cha 🤍
fine then, i just got bored of you
is that what you wanted to hear?
that i just stopped loving you?
because that’s what happened.
y/n 💋
fuck you charles
i knew I shouldn’t have dated you
I should’ve listened to everyone who told me to leave you.
cha 🤍
you should’ve 🤷
but you didn’t
You have blocked this contact
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yourusername • 1 hour ago
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maxverstappen1 replied to your story
maxverstappen1
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hey, sorry about the break up
charles never deserved you though.
Seen just now
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౨ৎ some crazy shit forreal 😭😭🙏🏼🙏🏼 now me personally i could never take charles back (why am i lying)… okay anyways i hope you enjoyed this 🐨🐌🤍
requested by my wife @landovilla ily 👩‍❤️‍💋‍👩👩‍❤️‍💋‍👩👩‍❤️‍💋‍👩 ౨ৎ
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everywherea11thetime · 8 months ago
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So High School | ln4 x singer!reader| smau
warnings: mentions of sex
a/n: added a lil espresso bc it was way too short:/
y/ninstagram
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liked by 300,405 others
y/ninstagram: New single out now! It’s called so high school. I wanna thank jack for helping produce this and i wanna thank my boy for being my muse<3 You know who you are i love you;).
view all comments
fan63: YESS Y/N IS FEEDING USSSS
fan95: hello who is this about😭
fan24: girlll “you know how to drive i know Aristotle” imma need every person who has a license in the world
fan78: is this abt a race car driver?
→fan75: Nascar maybe??
mclaren: We love the song y/n🧡
→fan35: ariana wyd here?
→fan40: is the song about a mclaren driver?
→fan28: girl no
twitter
fan40: guys I think so high school is abt a McLaren f1 driver and here’s why. Most obvious one, in her song So High School she says you know how to drive i know aristotle, so it’s somebody in the racing world, then on her anouncement mclaren commented saying that they “loved the song” know it might just be that y/n a McLaren f1 fan but also maybe they met at the bahrain gp that y/n was in march. coincidence I THINK NOT.
→fan38: girl im not gonna lie ur kinda onto something…
→fan82: nurse shes out again!
F1wags
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Liked by:y/ninstagram and 18,974 others
F1wags: Lando Norris and singer/songwriter Y/n Y/Ln spotted at Club Gascon in London out only a week after speculations of who her new song So High School was about. People said they had their romantic dinner then were spotted walking to the guildhall art gallery. New couple alert?
view all comments
fan64: Y/N IN THE LIKES?????!!!!
fan71: guys maybe that twitter thread was right…
fan49: she dates to many guys, im scared for lando
→fan57: her song abt him is literally how she wants them to be forever bsffr…
fan35: Not my two worlds colliding
fan91: im actually so ready for this relationship
fan86: the next album is about to be so fireee
fan63: @/y/ninstagram @/landonorris care to explain yourselves???
→y/ninstagram: No thanks
→landonorris: no we’re good
→fan63: WE’RE!!!???????
fan54: THEY HIT THE PENTAGON
Texts between lando and y/n
y/n: should we just hard launch already?
landino: I mean they kinda already know.
y/n: alr im making the post, make yours sweet please. I dont trust you
landino: awhh please baby i had a whole caption out😔🤚
y/n: don’t come crying to after mclaren scolding you again babe
landino: YIPPIEEEE
y/ninstagram
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y/ninstagram: you know what you wanted and boy, you got her🧡 ft real pic of me on the last slide watching lan and his friends listen to so high school
tagged:landonorris
comments
maxfewtrell: still haven’t recovered from that song…
→landonorris: wanna play gta tonight?
→maxfewtrell: NO
→angryginge13: NO
→martingarrix: NO
→ maxverstappen: NO
→ danielricciardo: NO
→ y/ninstagram: damn, American Pie then?
landonorris: love you babe(i would have chose kill)
→ y/ninstagram: oh what’d you say “no sex for a month”
→ landonorris: NO I SAID I LOVE YOU AND YOUR THE BEST PERSON ON THIS EARTH AND YOUR SO AWESOME AND COOL😍❤️❤️❤️💕💕😘😘🥰(plz lemme eat u out)
fan40: I WAS RIGHT AND U ALL SAID I WAS CRAZY
fan83: the fifth slide!!!!???
fan74: they’re actually so cute omg
landonorris
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liked by:y/Instagram and 1,031,495
landonorris: it’s true, swear, scouts honor . Also me n her if we were in gta🤭
Comments
Maxfewtrell:WAIT I JUST GOT THE SCOUTS HONOR LYRIC… GROSS
→ landonorris: sorry💁
→ y/ninstagram: sorry💁‍♀️
martingarrix: I will never be able to look either of y'all in the eye
→ y/ninstagram: sorry💁‍♀️
→ landonorris: sorry💁
Y/Instagram: i told you to make it sweet…
→landonorris: this IS sweet…like you😛
→y/Instagram: blocked and reported
fan57: 3RD SLIDE IS SO MOMMY🧎‍♀️🧎‍♀️
Mclaren: hey can we maybe not
fan10: y/n plz I could treat you so much better
→landonorris: did you not listen to the song?
carlossainz: landos not so little anymore🥲
→y/Instagram: definitely not little
oscarpiastri: guys please tell them to stop making out in front of me I. AM. TIRED
Y/Instagram
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liked by landonorris and 2,275,286 others
y/ninstagram: ESPRESSO SONG AND MUSIC VIDEO OUT NOW!
veiw all comments
landonorris: you mountain dew it for me😻😻😻
landonorris: first
landonorris: most beautiful amazing gorgeous person on this earth🤭🤭
→y/ninstagram: 🤭🤭🤭 cmere🤭🤭🤭
→ landonorris: yes ma’am🧎‍♀️🧎‍♀️
fan45: not Lando being a simp on main
→landonorris: AND I WILL DO IT AGAIN
fan76: why does vroom vroom guy keep getting songs😔
→y/ninstagram: the d is fireeeeee
☺︎☺︎☺︎☺︎☺︎☺︎☺︎☺︎☺︎☺︎☺︎☺︎☺︎☺︎☺︎☺︎☺︎☺︎☺︎☺︎☺︎☺︎☺︎☺︎☺︎☺︎☺︎☺︎☺︎☺︎☺︎☺︎☺︎☺︎☺︎☺︎☺︎
a/n2: sorry this took so long and was so short, collage is not for the weak and I've had tests all week
421 notes · View notes
cocoreallylovesraiden · 3 months ago
Text
Bi Han living with reader hcs
(bullet points and blurbs) THIS WAS FOR AN INBOX ASK BUT I DELETED IT NOOO SHAWTY IM SO SORRY!!! I HOPE DIVINE INTERVENTION SENDS YOU THIS POST TELEPATHICALLY UR A STAR!
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-Unless it’s for marriage, you would only move in with him if it was a matter of your safety. 
-Otherwise he would just trust you to manage on your own since if you can handle him you can handle anything in the world 
-Let’s say during a moment of conflict where a large percentage of earthrealm was a risk, he would ask (more like order) you to stay with him with the Lin Kuei. 
-Going to his quarters is like walking into an expensive furniture store and being afraid to get your commoner hands on anything at all. 
-You are left to settle your meagre belongings yourself, with strict instructions not to wander into the training compounds without a guide (read: himself), and though there were the usual lin kuei members patrolling about, you still felt incredibly isolated. 
-But the feeling goes from loneliness to an almost childlike wonder. It eventually leads to you taking a museum tour around the place like DAMN! This is what rich people's shampoo looks like! It’s… not very used… which is a little gross. 
-He comes back from his duties and is surprised when you greet him! Not in a cute way, in the way that you have to dodge tree trunk arms being swung at you like baseball bats. 
-The time you spend together is very mundane. Any energy he has is used on the Lin Kuei, which is understandable and honestly preferable because you get to be around a SLIGHTLY less high-strung bi han
-That doesn’t mean he doesn’t have the energy to be insufferably tungsten-like when it came to nighttime
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It seemed as though he had long settled his belongings into the intricate bedside drawer. He had yet to answer your question, leaving you to wonder if it had been in bad taste. You nervously tilt your head, trying to get a better view of him. You see Bi Han’s broad back, blocking the blue moonlight in a way reminiscent of Batman standing above Gotham skylines. The thought makes you snicker, a sound that’s soft in theory but almost echoes in the deathly quiet room. It makes his tense shoulders jump to his ears, and you can see his dark eyes dart to the very corners as if trying to get a glimpse of you without physically turning around. He stays perfectly still, like if he just didn’t breathe he could melt into the fabric of the bedsheets. 
The realisation dawns upon you like a humouring punch to the gut. Was he nervous? The big, bad grandmaster of Lin Kuei, nervous to have his partner in his bed? You have to throw yourself to face the other way, hand covering your mouth like it was a hostage situation. Unfortunately, a few stray cackles manage to escape you and this time you hear Bi Han scoff out a ‘is there something funny?’ 
It’s uncharacteristically strained, like a defensive child having to explain their search history. My god, he was really thrown off-kilter by you! The unintentional ego boost goes straight to your head as you readjust yourself, using your elbow to prop yourself up in a position you could only hope came off as comedically seductive. The face you met with is priceless, a mixture of second-hand embarrassment and horror etched onto his sharp features. 
You let out a laugh that sounds more like a chicken squawking, one that’s unfortunately interrupted by a rock-hard grain pillow being hurled at your head. It lands perfectly, because Bi Han only ever does things perfectly, and the speed that you slump onto the bed has him wondering if he accidentally murdered the one person who tolerated him non-professionally. 
He barks out your name, and groans when he hears you laughing from under your potential murder weapon. It’s not as amusing to him as it is for you, seeing as by the time you’ve freed yourself he’s turned his back to you with the air of an unforgiving housewife. No matter how much you grovel and paw at his head and back he refuses to say anything, but you know he’s awake because he flinches whenever you poke his sides. 
Bi Han huffs like a guard dog when you stop pestering him (because common misconception, you did need to sleep as well) and right as you're drifting off to sleep you feel the bed shift, and the pleasant coolness of his body temperature a little closer. 
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-He wakes up early in the mornings and I personally do not think this guy eats breakfast but he definitely drinks tea
-He wakes up early in the mornings and I personally do not think this guy eats breakfast but he definitely drinks tea
-You two can share the wonderful joy of standing shoulder to shoulder making your respective morning drinks and judging each other for it
-Bi Han have you considered that you are a cranky bat because you don’t have coffee in the morning 
-Haha. You are so Funny. Have you considered the fact that you are stuck in the bathroom for an hour in the morning because of it.
-Too far Bi han too far
-During his daily duties, like while he watches his little foot goons do their drills he sometimes spaces out and wonders what you are doing back in his quarters. 
-If he sees you walking around the compound, god forbid trying to get your 10k steps in he has to do a triple take, then storms towards you with the intention of an air strike. 
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When he sees your familiar mop of head peek through the intricate pillars of the Lin Kuei compound, it’s like an alarm goes off in his head. Thankfully he had been alone, travelling from supervising two training grounds; so he has time to get to you personally. The way your face lights up almost qualms the lecture brewing in his mind, but then he remembers what happened the last time you were left alone with a room of his men (the lin kuei had never been so close to unionising. God fears the scorn of a charismatic woman.) 
“What did I tell you about leaving alone without a guide? I cannot have you wandering aimlessly like a lost child.” It’s a tirade that he’s gone through countless times, and it’s more of a custom than meaning any of the words. You also seem to know, with how you barely raise an eyebrow at his stern words. A cheeky smile carves your cheeks as you stick out an elbow, and even as he continues his rant he subconsciously goes to link your arms together. 
“I have a guide, do I not? And a very handsome one.” You sound collected and suave, but even he can see the way you high-five yourself for thinking of that pick-up line. He wants to frown, but the dopamine he gets from the flattery has him frowning happily, trying to bite back a snort.
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-Hes not kicking his feet giggling when he sees you after a day of work… but hes not NOT twirling his hair and shuffling in place
-Gets mad when you don’t run up to him the moment he goes through the door
-Ok diva
233 notes · View notes
munsster · 2 years ago
Note
hii!! i'd like to request a steve harrington x fem!reader fic pls <33 reader confesses to steve, but he says he doesn't like her. then reader's all 'okay fine, i'm gonna move on' and when she actually does that, steve is 🥺 lots of angst please and some steve grovelling teehee <33
gut feeling
A/N: okay yes 😏 i screwed this up the littlest bit, but i hope it still tickles ur fancy. also i’ve seen this done for king!steve and i wanted to write it for s4 steven
Pairing: Steve Harrington x Fem!Reader
Summary: You have big feelings for Steve, he’s just not sure he feels the same way. 3.6k words.
Warnings: angst, but it resolves into fluff, unrequited love trope, lots of feelings, friends to lovers?, CURSING!, italics, established friendship, feat. Keith 😑
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"You think it would be gross if we kissed?"
Steve thinks you might actually sound hurt, but he also thinks the face he's making is hilarious beyond belief: kind of contorted and screwed inward, nose scrunched and trying really hard to batten down a grin. You glare at him from the passenger's seat, arms crossed tight over your green Family Video vest.
You think he's wonderful despite his naiveté. If only he knew how handsome you thought he was, all caramel locks and big brown eyes and the kind of smile that reaches his eyes before he's even thought of it. No wonder he has an ego up to the moon. No wonder he still manages to weasel his way into the creases and crevices of any living creature's heart. Even yours. Hell, especially yours.
"Yeah, duh!"—and he's so sure of it, you could cry—"You're like the little sister I never had!"
You chuckle but you look like you're about to hurl yourself out of the car or get yourself arrested for manslaughter. Thank God he's only a block away from your house, or he'd never see the light of day again. Does he really think of you like that? The soft laughter peters out into a grating silence that burns right down your throat and feels like hard metal settling in your lungs.
He doesn't dare glance over at you. He only bites down hard around nothing and grimaces, eyes set hard on the lines dashing beneath the grill of his car. Jesus Christ, he does not think of you like that. And he begs whatever stupid pride is keeping him steady in this nonexistent pissing contest to leave it be, but its jaw is set in the tender meat of the game.
"Don't have to be so jovial about it," you grumble.
"What?"
"Mine's on the left," you grumble, nodding out the window. Oh, he's definitely in trouble. You only ignore him like this when he's done something boyish to a fault.
"I know. I drive you home every—hey!"
"Bye," you coo, booking it up the steps to your door, refusing to turn over your shoulder for fear that you'll burst into tears upon seeing him smile or frown or crack the slightest look of confusion.
He watches you slam the door and rolls the passenger window up with a frustrated sigh. Where the Hell did that come from and why. All while you're sitting against the foot of your bed, chattering into the phone at Robin, still wearing your uniform and tugging at strands of your hair as expletives weave themselves between every three words.
"Oh my Fucking God, I'm so fucking embarrassed right now, Robs—Does he—? Does he think I'm some sort of fuckin' baby? I just don't—"
"He's just being Steve, okay? He probably didn't mean it—"
"The way he looked at me, Robin, I felt like a fucking imbecile. Of all the dickheads in the world I could fall for, my heart chose Harrington? Maybe I'm the idiot." You sigh and kick your feet out, the frustration winding up new nerves and letting them go like tight springs to fling out over your body.
She sighs and it rattles through the grainy speaker. "You're not an idiot; he has his moments. Don't beat yourself up, you know how he gets. He's probably not thinking straight, just... tell him? The worst he can say is—"
"That I'm like a sister to him? Oh, how delightful. That's even worse than just flat out admitting I'm unattractive."
"You're not unattractive, don't do that."
"I am to him," you groan.
"Hey," she hums after a beat of crackling silence. You close your eyes and grip the sickly yellow receiver a little tighter.
"I really like him."
"I know."
"And it sucks."
"I know." The other end rustles and you let out a curt sigh just as you move to stand. "I love you, and I'm here for you. Especially when dumb boys make you feel like shit. You'll always be the most amazing and most beautiful girl in my life, don't forget that."
"Thank you. I'll see you, Robs."
"Take it easy."
Steve wakes up to an ache in his neck and a soreness in his knuckles. You didn't call him last night. And he's assuming you didn't call him before school this morning because his alarm clock flashes eleven, first period starts at eight-thirty, and the tone his ancient landline emits is shrill enough to deafen a man. Let alone wake him up in a cold sweat. He concocts a sick feeling in his stomach of burnt orange shame and maroon guilt because he has to wait until closing shift tonight to explain himself to you.
But by then, he's feeling spiteful. You weren't home when he went to pick you up and he waited ten minutes and knocked on the door in bulk. Until someone who was not you answered and told him that you'd gotten a ride with some jerk from the Hawkins High football team. That's not how it was originally said, but that's how he heard it. So you're avoiding him? It makes him spit up a little in his mouth, and he's going about twenty over the speed limit the entire way to make it on time.
By the time he can fling open the glass door and hear the sound of the tiny bell, he spots you in the back corner with a stack of tapes under your arm. Listening to music. To drown him out. And it makes him frown. Six hours. That's how long he'd have to endure this, then he could go home and not call you and not be able to sleep.
The casette in your Walkman can only run for so long, right? But he watches you rewind it after an hour and a half and slumps against the front desk when you grab a new stack of tapes from behind him. He simmers down after the first half of the shift, and of course, the fact that you won't talk to him rubs him the wrong way, but what's even worse is that now you're bumming rides off of losers on the worst football team in all of Indiana.
He gets worked up thinking about that guy's motivation and how many times he probably tried to make a pass at you. Steve would never do that to you. Even if he wanted to, he's a gentleman at heart. He could beat that jerk to a pulp just imagining him giving you the look. God forbid that sucker puts his hands on you. Steve would get charged with battery before ever letting that happen.
It's not like he can say anything to you about it either. He's pissed, and he knows himself. He'd get all angry and confrontational, and you deserve better than that. It's his fault you got there first, and it's his fault you got to stocking, and it's his fault you're tuning him out. But he didn't think what he said last night would be worth all that trouble.
"If you keep up the optic blast, I'm gonna buy you a ruby-quartz visored monocle." And that droning voice could only belong to one overbearing manager.
"What do you need, Keith?" Steve grumbles, and out of the corner of his eye, he catches you looking to the front of the store to watch the encounter with a smirk.
"Duty calls, Harrington. Corporate sent us more shelf space. Need someone to unload it into the office," Keith murmurs, shooting a glance your way, "And, uh... it's kind of unwieldy, so get the kid to help you out."
It makes Steve's eye twitch because you're not some kid. And if you heard Keith refer to you as such, you'd unleash a fleet of curses on him. Only Steve is allowed to call you that. Because it's funny, duh. You're a year younger than him, obviously he's going to use that to his comedic advantage. Oh.
He lets out a sigh—"alright"—and leaves Keith to man the front while he skirts to the back of the store and leads you by the hand through the office.
"'The Hell, Harrington?" you hiss, but you keep your fingers locked between Steve's, abandoning the rest of the tapes on Keith's desk and jogging to catch up with his stride. As forward and demanding as his grip may be, you have to admit, the warmth of his palm is comforting and it makes your heart race because you've never held hands with Steve before. And in any other circumstance, you might've been able to enjoy it a little more.
"Keith told me to tell you that you have to help me bring a shelf in from the truck."
"Oh, I have to?" you bark, now pulling your hand away and putting your headphones around your neck once you exit through the back door with him. "And you didn't think to give me a warning before yanking on my arm?"
"Yes, you have to, and maybe if you weren't listening to that shit so loud, you would've been in the loop." It comes out far more harsh than he intended, and that was exactly what he was afraid of happening in a confrontation with you. His brow softens, and the tension in his upper back and jaw dissipates into his own self-pity party. "And I didn't yank on your arm. Or at least I didn't mean to, so I'm sorry for that much."
Steve hops up into the truck and offers you a hand you don't take as much as you both wish you would have. Because he looks like a kicked puppy, and you have to stop yourself from cheering yourself on. Maybe this will be your first literal step towards getting over him. Once and for all.
After about fifteen minutes of heaving and ho-ing, the two of you manage to haul the shelf into the office as per Keith's request. He was right: it was unwieldy. The awkward grip spots caused a lot of overlap, and you both flinched away from the physical contact in a matter of milliseconds. But Steve couldn't deny he felt bad, and you couldn't deny that you definitely still had feelings for him.
You grab your previously abandoned stack of tapes to scurry out of the office, but Steve stops you by the elbow. And you glare back at him.
"Sorry. The... yanking, I know"—he shoves his hands in his pockets and looks down—"Look, I'm not entirely sure what happened last night in the car, but it clearly made you uncomfortable, and I'd like to apologize."
He can see the neurons firing when he looks you in the eye, but he can also see that his apology wasn't effective in the slightest. Because you're still anger-ridden and fuming at him. You put your headphones on and go back to restocking shelves.
He checks the digital clock above the door. Two hours till eleven. Great.
And they creep by like refrigerated molasses. Second by second. Every time he glances at the clock, only a minute has passed. Eventually, though, he starts cleaning up for closing: vacuuming, cleaning the windows, fixing the display. And he finds himself getting a little more efficient at checking tapes back in and rewinding them only so you'll cruise by the front—scowling at him, but nonetheless at him—to grab a new stack and shelf it.
Five minutes to closing and a sleek, blue sedan pulls into the parking lot, and you practically beam at it, grinning and skipping to the front. You grab your bag from under the counter next to Steve's hip and shove your Walkman into it.
"You know, my car works perfectly fine," he grumbles, "don't have to replace me with some football jerk." He knows that struck a nerve because your smile immediately flickers away into a squint.
"That football jerk is bilingual, a painter, and lets me listen to the music I like in his car."
"But that's not the rules," he whines, desperately defending himself against some sports guy who's probably taking advantage of you.
"Well, I like him and he's nice to me." You sling your bag over your shoulder triumphantly, marching towards the door.
Steve is aghast at the implication. He thought you liked listening to the radio. Plus he took Spanish and art for the required two years, it's not that great of an achievement.
Still, he sputters out, "Yeah, well—"
You wave over your shoulder. "Later, Steve."
Since when did he become such a loser.
He watches jerk-face open the car door for you then glance over to wave at him with a perfect smile and perfect hair and perfect manners. What an asshole. Steve does not wave back.
"That's the kinda guy she likes?" he fusses into the phone, palming his face while Robin chuckles on the other line. This whole time he thought for sure you liked the self-assured, cocky, college-age boy type. And now you're dating a high schooler. Come on, jerk-face is not even that good looking.
"First of all, they're not dating. Second of all, don't lie to make yourself feel better; even I can admit he's basically a Greek god," Robin says, shoving a handful of popcorn into her mouth. "Third... why do you care? You’re acting like it’s your job to protect her, but it’s not. She’s an adult now, you know, she can take her of herself.”
He lets out a puff of air through his nose, blinking hard and leaning into the pale yellow receiver. Then mumbling: "She told you."
And she replies, cheerily: "Yup."
"Well—! I just... don't want to see her get hurt. I know that type of guy. I used to be that type of guy. He's bad news, I can tell."
"Right,” Robin scoffs, “It's definitely not because you love her.”
"I don't love her. She's just a baby, and we don't even like the same things. It would never work out between us, there's no connection." They both know it’s a lame excuse, but it’s worked up until this moment. It’s worked since the day you met. You’re too young, the end. Sure, you can be cute sometimes, but you’re also a pain in the ass and you two could never get along long enough to stitch together a real relationship.
But Robin sees through all of that shit. And she’s over it.
“Okay, maybe, but she listens when you talk about cars, and you buy the albums she likes even when she only mentions them once. Plus, you both love Dustin like he's an extra limb”—she’s right, you love that kid to death and Lord knows Steve looks after him like a son—“I think as much as you wretch and complain over her being too young and the connection not 'being there', it seems like you try an awful lot to get her to like you."
He immediately rejects the idea with a scoff.
"Of course I’d want a cool person to like me, old fuckin’ habits die hard. But that's all. She's cool and has a good sense of style and tells the best jokes and makes me feel smart and listens to me, and right now I'm feeling pretty crazy because maybe I do love her and I blew it because... because? Because I don’t know why—but she's probably sitting in some jerk's car listening to her favorite songs and watching him paint the sunset while speaking Spanish or whatever."
Robin closes her eyes, and Steve’s annoyed by the fact that he can hear her smirking. "Jesus Christ, I need to start charging you idiots for my time"—and she sighs—"Just... tell her all that cheese. And maybe throw in an apology or two. I don't know, do what you usually do when you pick up girls.”
He’s frustrated. And annoyed. But he throws a thanks at her anyway and stomps down the stairs and to his beamer. It’s not until he’s shrouded in the piercing light of the convenience store that he realizes three things: he’s still in his work uniform, it’s midnight, and he’s pretty sure he does love you. He grabs a bouquet, not even realizing it’s a bouquet of amaryllis and baby’s breath—he’d prefer roses, but ‘tis not the season, as the cashier told him.
Minutes later, he’s muttering under his breath like he’s mad, waiting for someone to answer your door. And thank God you do.
“Steve—?”
“Oh, shit, did I—were you—?”
“Oh, no, I was just…”—thinking about him—“nothin’. What’re you doing here?”
He pushes a furious hand through his hair, then tucks a chunk behind his ear, worrying at his bottom lip. More nervous than he’s been in his whole life. Then he flashes those soft brown eyes at you, and you’re toast. You step onto your doormat and shut the door behind you because he starts into his sentence like a blazing fire:
"I feel so stupid, and I’m sorry for saying you're like a little sister to me; I don’t believe that, and it couldn’t be further from the truth. You're not like a sister to me, you're like the only thing that matters and I feel like I wanna learn another language for you and take a cooking class for you and listen to your music with you. I just, I mean I’m trying to say you make me want to be a better person, and I feel like I’m already a better person whenever I’m around you. I... what I’m saying—and I promise I’m getting to it—is that I’m sorry for being so stupid and not seeing it before, but I think you're beautiful and I'd be honored if you'd forgive me and maybe consider letting me take you out sometime. Like on a date."
He’s breathing heavily, looking and feeling manic, and your eyes are wide as you slowly process his confession. It goes down like sweet wine, floral down your throat and settling in your tummy like candy. But still: what the fuck? Is he insane? Are you insane?
His hair is flopped to one side, and his work vest is snug around his shoulders. You step forward slowly, and the creases in his forehead seem to go smooth. And you point to the bouquet.
“For me?”
Steve glances down. "Oh, yeah, got em for you. Sorry they're not roses, it's not—"
"I love them, thank you."
He nods. And you smile. And despite how beautiful the soft pink and white flowers are, you’re not particularly focused on their safety when you hook your arms beneath his and rope him into a hug. It’s clearly just what he needed when he goes pliant and heavy against your chest, smiling into your neck as his hands wrap over your shoulders.
"I think we might both be stupid,” you whisper.
He chuckles. "Yup. Just a couple of stupids. Geez, what kinda pair are we?" You both pull away. Only to look at each other squarely. To see a smile creep and creep across the other’s face. And he cocks a brow and says, "By the way, worst twenty-four hours of my life—"
And that’s saying something after the last three years.
"Oh, I'm so sorry, Steve, I was just so—"
"I know."
"So confused and disappointed, it was—"
"Torture, yeah, don't even think about doing that ever again,” he teases, pinching your side and scrunching his nose when you pinch him back.
"Yeah. Well, never tell me I’m like a little sister to you ever again.”
Gross.
"I don't plan on it"
With the slow bat of your lashes, and the tender curve of your lips, he can’t not think about kissing you. Not in this light. Not under the meddling moon, and not holding your waist like cupping pools of honey.
Then you look away. For all the shit you talk, he manages to make you far more shy than he ever anticipates. And it gives him butterflies to see you duck away.
"You know, I think you're pretty beautiful yourself, Harrington.”
Oh, he’s blushing now. The blood gushes hot to his face, he could sweat buckets right here and now. You can probably hear his heartbeat. Jesus Christ, what’ve you done to him? You can tell he’s nervous when he chuckles softly. "Does this mean I can start giving you rides again?"
You pretend to weigh your options. As if there would ever be a better alternative. "Only if you let me play my music sometimes.”
"Absolutely. I never liked the radio much anyway."
You let go of him only to cradle your bouquet in both hands, admiring the petals while Steve puts his hands back in his pockets.
"Then I'll see you later," he says. Grinning ear to ear, mind you.
"Yeah,” you coo, “I’ll see you."
With one hand on his shoulder, you plant a kiss on his willing cheek and let him go. But before he can make it to his car you holler, “Wait!” and he jogs back over to you.
"Did I forget somethin’?"
“Yeah,” you poke, "you forgot about our date."
He tilts his head a little, brows furrowed. "Our... our date? What do you mean our… Ohhhh”—he nods in understanding, suddenly hit with a wave of excitement and embarrassment—"Does tomorrow work? We could grab lunch or dinner or something and maybe stop by the arcade or—oh, the fair's in town, that could be kinda fun, unless you don't want to, I mean—"
"Steve?" you hum.
“Mhm?”
"I'd love to."
And suddenly his ego is miles through the roof; he's nodding and grinning and it’s like he can’t wait to wake up tomorrow just to see you again.
"Me too. Okay. Yeah! I'll see you then."
"Bye, Stevie.” You give him a small wave, and the shroud of plastic around the bouquet crinkles like the corners of his eyes at the idea of tomorrow.
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b3ach-bunn7 · 4 months ago
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CALL ME IF YOU GET LOST
Texts with your best friend Touya (who’s a little bit in love with you)
no quirk au <3
—————————————————————————-
January 9th
8:47 pm
You: OH TOUYAAAAA
You: it’s nearly ur bd 😁 what shall I get u
Touya: Nothing
Touya: Just Ur love 😍
You: ew
You: shall I get u some new earrings
You: OH I COULD PAY FOR ANOTHER PIERCING
Touya: Literally where
Touya: I think I’ve pierced every available location on my face
Touya: Unless… You meant somewhere else 😳
You: EWWWWWWWW
You: UR SUCH A FREAK
Touya: I meant my belly button?
You: stfu
Touya: Get your head out the gutter
You: shut up pooya
Touya: Wow you really got me there!
You: HUSH
January 12th
8:39 am
You: bruh where r u
You: homeroom started like ten minutes ago
Touya: I just woke up
Touya: Leaving onw buy shoti is lissing me kff
You: okay English!!!
Touya: Kys
You: but you can type that right…
January 12th
1:40 pm
You: Touyaaaaaa
You: can we go get food
You: the canteen stuff is rubbish today
You: plz I’m so sos is so hungry I’m dying
Touya: Fatty
You: HEY
You: SO MEAN
Touya: I’m only joking sweetcheeks
You: gross
Touya: You love it
Touya: Shiggy wants to come 2
Touya: Is that Ok
You: sigh fine I guess
Touya: Shall I tell him he’ll be third wheeling if he does 😳
You: yes 🥰🥰🥰😍 he just can’t interrupt our time together my sweet
Touya: Ew
You: you love it
January 13th
7:40 pm
You: GST ON MINECRAFTTT
Touya: I’m doing homework
You: I’m doing your mum OHHH
Touya: Woah
Touya: Telling her u said that
You: PLZ IM JOKING
You: I’ll tell her ur telling porky pies
You: Rei would trust my word over urs anyways 😈
Touya: Lowkey she would
Touya: My own mother 😢
You: I’m just better ig
You: how long r u gonna be
Touya: Give me like fifteen mins
You: BOO
Touya: Bro Aizawa is up my ass rn
Touya: If I hand one more piece of work in late he’s gonna acc kill me
You: idk why u hate him so much
You: i love him
You: and he has that sexy teacher look🤤 those luscious locks
Touya: R u sure u can get off his dick long enough for us to play
You: HAHAHAH
You: STFU
You: ur just jealous
Touya: So very
Touya: Why aren’t u hyping ME up like that
You: cause u smell?
Touya: I’m not playing
You: IM JOKING
You: U smell so good and yummy
You: like cigarette smoke 😍
Touya: 🙄
You: sassy 💁‍♀️
Touya: Stop distracting me so I can work
You: okay smelly
January 15th
2:30 pm
Touya: Y/N
Touya: Y/n
Touya: Y/NNNN
Touya: Queen
Touya: Sweetheart
Touya: Angel
You: if you throw one more piece of paper at my head I’m blocking u
Touya: You won’t check ur phone
Touya: How else can I get ur attention from across the room
You: WE R I. CLASS
Touya: So?
You: think I figured out why Aizawa doesn’t rate u
You: pay attention
Touya: But I miss u
Touya: And I’m bored
You: U LITERALLY SAW ME LIKE HALF AN HOUR AGO
You: AT LINCH
Touya: Ur point?
You: omfg
Touya: So what’s up
You: I’m gonna kill you
January 17th
6:50 pm
Fuyumi: Hi Y/N
You: hey fuyumi!!
You: everything okay?
Fuyumi: Yeah, it’s great!!
Fuyumi: Just wanted to tell u that everyone needs to be at ours for Touya’s party at 5:00
Fuyumi: We’ll tell him to come home at like six so that gives us some time to get everything ready
You: beautiful
You: do u think he has any idea were throwing him a party 🤭🤭
Fuyumi: I don’t think so 😆 we have been very careful
Fuyumi: Even shoto has kept his mouth shut
You: yeah I had to threaten twice a couple times before he promised to not tell
You: IM EXCITED
Fuyumi: Me too!!!
Fuyumi: Can’t wait to see u 😊
You: I can’t wait either!!!
Fuyumi: I hope he’ll like it
Fuyumi: We’re getting mum to drive all across town to get him that cake he loves
Fuyumi: I really want him to have fun
You: don’t worry babe he will have fun
You: and if he doesn’t I’ll force him to 😈
January 17th
7:00pm
Touya: U guys r throwing me a surprise party right
You: what?
Touya: For my bd
Touya: Fuyumi is being all suspicious
Touya: Told me I have to leave the house tomorrow but also come back at six oclock??
Touya: And the little brat keeps giggling at me
You: uhm don’t call little shoto that
Touya: Ur deflecting
Touya: They r throwing a party aren’t they
You: they aren’t
You: idk why you think that
Touya: Y/N
You: WHY DO U HAVE TO RUIN EVERYTHING
Touya: Lol
You: please please don’t tell them you know
You: they’re so excited for do this for you
You: [screenshot attachment]
You: look what Fuyumi said to me
Touya: Oh
You: please don’t spoil 😔
Touya: Don’t worry your pretty little head
Touya: I won’t
You: YAY
You: LOVE U
Touya: Ly2
January 18th
12:00am
You: [audio messsage]
You: enjoy me whisper singing happy bd to u
You: HAPPY BIRTHDAYYYYYYY WOOOOO
You: LOVE U THE MOST
You: okay I need to sleep we have school tomorrow
January 18th
3:07am
Touya: Thank you y/n
Touya: Ly the most too
January 18th
6:15 pm
You: Touya where tf r u
Touya: I’m On my way!
You: we’ll be On your way! FASTER
Touya: STFU
You: U STFU
Touya: U TOLD ME TO MAKE THIS BELIEVEBE
Touya: MY FAMILY WOULD NOT BELEIWV I GOT THERE ON TIME
You: wait ur right lowkey
Touya: exactly
You: well walk faster
Touya: I’m not walking
Touya: I’m driving
You: HOW TF R U TEXTING ME
Touya: Imd riving one handed?
You: GET TF OFF UR PHONE 😭
January 19th
12:04 am
Touya: Y/N
Touya: Thank u for gifts
Touya: The strap for my bass
Touya: And the necklace
Touya: I lowbe them
Touya: and the aprty was so fun
Touya: I lovwd it
Touya: and I lobe you
You: that’s okay 😁
You: are u drunk rn🤔
Touya: Snuch out with bawks
Touya: Hrwks
Touya: Hawks
Touya: Raided fathers liquoye supply
You: you went to your dad’s house????
Touya: NO
Touya: never
Touya: stolen from when he was gere
Touya: fukcing loser 😂😂
You: where r u guys?
Touya: hawks house
Touya: his oarents arent home
Touya: u wanbawcome over
Touya: I’ll kuck him out
You: u can’t kick hawks out of his own house 😭
You: why do u even need to kick him out we’re friends
Touya: he flirst with y so much
Touya: flirts
Touya: pisses me off
You: awwwww r u jelly 🥺
Touya: yes
You: LOL
You: yeah maybe lay off the the drinks buddy
Touya: I live u
Touya: love
Touya: I loved the gifts u got me rhwnks
You: you already said babe
Touya: sorry baby Im so drunk
You: okay I’m going to go before you say something you’ll regret in the morning
You: goodnight birthday boy
January 19th
1:05 pm
Touya: Please erase last night from ur memory
You: last night was a movie 😍
Touya: Yeah a fucking horror
You: HAHAHA
Touya: My head is killing me
You: painkillers?
Touya: Idk where they r and Hawks is sleeping
You: did u guys just wake up 😭
Touya: I think I slept like at like five am
Touya: It’s nice smoking inside a house and not in some alleyway so mum doesn’t catch me
You: BOO
You: ur lungs hate u
Touya: I hate them back
Touya: It’s why I smoke
You: LOL SHUT UP
Touya: Fuck my HEAD
You: that’s what he said
Touya: Ew man
You: you love it
You: go drink some h2o
Touya: Enough chemistry in too tired
You: sigh fine
You: go get some WATER 💦
Touya: Fine
You: bye baby 🤪
Touya: I’ll kill you
You: but I thought you love me??
Touya: Ur dead to me
You: HAHHA
January 21st
7:06 pm
You: Touya
You: can I come over plz
Touya: Erm what 😳😳😳
You: seriously
You: can I
Touya: Yh ofc
Touya: You okay?
You: yh
You: well no actually
You: my dads being my dad again
You: I just can’t be in this house rn
You: I need to get away from him
Touya: Yeah u can anytime
Touya: Yk my family loves u
You: thanks
Touya: You want me to pick u up?
You: nah I wanna walk
You: thanks again
You: love u
Touya: Ly2
January 29th
5:28 pm
You: [image attachment]
You: BRUH HOW DID I LOSEEEE
You: I ATE SK BAD
Touya: Bruh get off dress to impress 😭
Touya: U r beefing ten year olds rn
You: idgaf
You: ten year olds who can’t fucking dress
You: I actually hate this game
You: that is NOT STEAM PUNK WHAT THE FUCK
Touya: Maybe get good
You: maybe kys???????
Touya: Words hurt 😔
You: man up?
Touya: Woah
Touya: Okay just perpetuate gender norms..
You: define perpetuate?
You: YH that’s what i thought
February 6th
7:06 pm
You: bro
You: all my friends have valentines apart from ME
Touya: Get good?
You: okay and where’s urs?
Touya: texting her rn 😍
You: omg 😳
You: but on a real I feel horrifically left out
You: Toga keeps flaunting it in my face
Touya: That little freak got one?
Touya: Who
You: yk that girl in 1-A with the chubby cheeks
You: they r so cute omg
You: how come toga has a lesbian lover and I’m jobless and hoeless 😔
Touya: I can help with one of those things
You: u hiring???
Touya: I’ll be ur valentine
You: I can’t tell if ur joking
Touya: I’m not
You: do u have one romantic bone in ur body
Touya: I can think of one 😳
You: LMAO EW
Touya: Nah fr I’ll be ur valentine
You: okay…
You: ask me properly tho
Touya: Okay
Touya: Hey Y/N
You: oh hi Touya! What’s up
Touya: Will u do me the great honour of being my valentine?
You: 😊 yes!
Touya: Thank you 😊😍
February 10th
2:02 pm
Touya: Omg
Touya: Y/N guess what
You: don’t text me in class lil bro
Touya: Someone asked me to be their valentine 🤪
You: what
You: Who
You: is she in our homeroom
You: did u tell her ur mine
Touya: Woahh
Touya: Jealous much
You: no I just don’t want to be a side piece 😔
Touya: No Dw I told her I’m urs 🥺
You: shush
You: yk what I meant
You: who was it tho
Touya: Idk some girl in my maths class
Touya: She seemed pretty sad when I said no
Touya: The ladies love me
You: she’ll get over it!
Touya: LOL
February 14th
8:03 am
You: OMG
You: ARE THESE FLOWERS MINE
Touya: No I got them for ur dad actually
You: TOUYAAA
You: THEYRE MY FAVS
You: THANM U SM
Touya: Anytime Valentine
February 14th
1:20 pm
Touya: Meet at my car
Touya: I’m taking u out for lunch
You: thank gosh
You: they’re selling some mystery meatloaf type deal and I’m no happy
You: hawksy wants to come too
Touya: No
Touya: Just u
You: girl he’s not gonna do anything
Touya: No this is like
Touya: Hold on
You: okay hawks is looking at his phone and typing
You: r u texting him
You: okay he magically doesn’t wanna come along anymore
Touya: Aw :((
Touya: I’m waiting outside
You: see u in a bit smelly
February 14th
1:50 pm
You: ur such a child
You: IM RIGHT IN FRONT OD U JUST TALK TO ME
Touya: NO
You: WHY
Touya: IK SCARED
You: I can see u smiling
Touya: Shut up
Touya: Okay listen
Touya: If u don’t like what I’m about to say we r going to act like this never happened okay
Touya: I will delete the message out of existence and thus out of ur mind
You: okay…
Touya: Okay so I kind of like actually asked u to be my Valentine not just because ur lonely
Touya: And I like really like you
Touya: As in like like
Touya: But I don’t wanna ruin our friendship because ur the best friend I’ve ever had and will ever have
Touya: So if u don’t feel the same we can just pretend this never happened
February 14th
8:00 pm
You: I’m home safe xxx
Touya: Don’t care
You: okay mr message me when ur back
You: okay mr parked in my driveway to make sure I got in okay???
Touya: Shut up
You: wait hold on
You: is that why uninvited hawks
You: so that u could ask me out
Touya: Yeah and the sky is also blue
You: SHUT UL
Touya: He’s so stupid yk
Touya: It was his idea ??
Touya: And he forgot
You: hey three’s a party!
Touya: So you would’ve kissed me as aggressively as you did if Hawks was there?
You: wait ur right..
You: Oh well
You: it was about time anyways
You: took u like three years and u did it over DMS
Touya: I’m shy 🥺
You: EW TF
You: I take the kiss back
Touya: These hickeys tell me a different story
You: HSUTUP
Touya: You love it
You: I love YOU 🫵
Touya: Yeah
Touya: Love you too
—————————————————————————
This was NOT supposed to end with a confession but I physically cannot help myself 😅 I love these text posts they’re so fun!!
Hope u all enjoyed <3
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gurugirl · 8 months ago
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how is our hot tutor coming along? i know u said ur busy bestie but just so excited! maybe a sneak peek?
OUR HOT TUTOR 🤭 Well he's definitely coming along. I think I'm nearly 8k words into part 2 and it's nearly nearly done! But I'm about to come to a stopping point with writing today (there's dishes to do and a man and a dog to feed 🙄) so I'm still holding out hope it'll be ready for y'all tomorrow since I'm so close. I just need to finish it off and write what's in my head. Sometimes it take a bit to sort out the chaos that's up there lol!
But I'll offer you this small sneaky! Something to tide you over 👀 ENJOY!! (not proofread)
Context: Y/n is at a house party
. . .
You turned to make your way to the kitchen for a refill when you saw something that made your heart drop and your stomach bubble in gross shock. It was Harry Styles dancing slowly behind some cute girl, his arms wrapped around her front, leaning down to her shorter height and he was kissing the side of her neck.
Your Harry. The one who had you all gooey and giddy after that “session”. The one who kissed your neck not that long ago. You wished he was dancing behind you like that. You wished you hadn’t been so sensitive and that you could throw caution to the wind and not care that he was sleeping with others. You wished you could have just given in that night at the bar and gone back to his… But you said no to him. And now here he was with someone else.
You gulped and turned to go to the bathroom instead, Gunther still eyeing you up from the spot where you’d left him.
You stayed in the bathroom for a bit. Not wanting to go out and see Harry and the cute brunette dancing. You knew she was in for a treat later on. But that should have been you. Pouting at yourself in the mirror you felt ridiculous. You knew what it was with Harry. That he was a free and single man and could do as he pleased. You really had no right to feel upset over what you’d seen. He’d done nothing wrong.
Dumping out the last bit of your drink in the sink you figured maybe it was just time to leave. You didn’t want to have to deal with Gunther nor did you feel like seeing Harry all over someone else. Perhaps tonight was just not going to be your night.
As you opened the bathroom door a figure stood in the way and your immediate thought was that Gunther had followed you but as you trailed your eyes upward it was clear the man was taller and you didn’t miss the nail polish on his fingers when he gripped the door. Everything stopped. The music, the air around your body, your heart…
“Y/n…” That deep voice spoke your name like it belonged on his tongue.
You looked up at him, removing your hand from the doorknob, and gave him a confused smile, “Hi Harry. What are you doing?”
He seemed off. Not drunk but maybe not quite sober either? You weren’t sure what to make of his behavior as he pulled the door open and stepped into the bathroom, closing it behind himself.
“I don’t know what I’m doing,” he stepped in toward you, your bottom hitting the edge of the porcelain sink, “Nothing makes sense lately. Just want to go back to how things were but I can’t. S’like I’ve got some kind of block. Something’s missing…”
sex tutor!harry tags: @gem1712 @cherrylovers-world @sophthearthoe @jerseygirlinca @violet2022
@uniquellyme @bluesart13 @hypnotizedsturn @lomlolivia @brittanyzelazno
@megobrah @kissfromadove
@thereadefofsmut @hsonlyangelxo @triski73 @vashapnin
@sialexia @dirtytissuebox @softxhariana @psicostyles
@ghayda0 @palestudentcalzonepony
WHAT DO YOU THINK IS GOING TO HAPPEN??
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sameschmidtdiffname · 10 months ago
Note
heyyyy can I pls req something where Mike tries to make it up to the reader after he says something wrong in their 1st fight as a couple? like “I don’t want to lose you” as an apology and they get back together or something along those lines? tysm I really enjoy ur work :))
But of course!!!
Wanting, Waiting
Mike Schmidt x Gender Neutral! Reader
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Summery: Overworked and underfed, you'll go to sleep once some decent work is complete. However, a late night turns into a day long fight.
Tags: No use of Y/N, no gender specific pronouns for Reader, pre-established relationship, argument, cursing, Reader and Mike both got some shit going on, hints of an eating disorder, overworking, hurt/comfort, crying, mentions of: suicide/death, depression, drugging, and kidnapping. Vulnerability is gross.
Notes: 'Slip' walked so this could run full speed into a brick wall. I feel as though I may have redeemed myself.
                     ▪︎◇{¤♧■♧¤}◇▪︎
This page is mocking me.
The hour is late. I stopped checking the clock around 2:00 A.M., and there's a cup of cold coffee right next to me on this table, several rings on the inside from where the coffee had been left sitting far too long. It's cheap, the flavor sticking to my teeth in a way that settles my lips into a slight grimace as I try to convince my hand to move my pen across the just as cheap notebook paper that has been sitting in front of me since I came home.
Come on. It's words. What the fuck is hard about this?
'It's not hard if you can actually get your head out of your ass and do something,' I think to myself. Not helping.
I have an irritating collection of drafts. Oh yes, I can start them and I can certainly plan out the works before me. But actually writing is somehow impossible, and even though I can feel how thick the block is in my mind, preventing me from communicating my feelings properly, I just can't get break myself out of it.
Come on. Finish one draft. Then everything will click together for the rest.
For the past few weeks it's been just like this. Come home, sit down with projects, and try. But no matter what I do, I just can't focus. It's as though my head simply won't allow it. And this house, quite frankly, isn't helping. It's admittedly unsettling atmosphere, the loud noises born from nothing. It's as though I can feel the weight of the dead that used to sit at the same glass table as I watching me over my shoulder, pressing their non-existent weight against me, making my chest tight with pressure I cannot voice because that's not fair to the ones still here truly haunted by their presence. I'm just a guest who overextends their stay, quite frankly.
Just a page. Just write a page and you can get up for a moment. Ignore how loud the fridge is at something clunks inside of it.
A page. Get a page. Come on, you imbecile, how hard is a fucking pa-
"I thought we talked about this."
It's a testament to my mental state how high I manage to jump in my chair, my tired and over-caffinated heart set off to make me dizzy with over exertion from fear, turning to see who has come to voice their thoughts and damn us both with them.
"Mike," I sigh. I place a hand on my chest, rubbing slightly at the spot where I feel my heart pounding against my sore ribs. "Don't do that."
"Have you slept at all?" Mike asks disapprovingly. His arms are crossed against his chest, heavy bags under his eyes from another night of restless dreams. He can't sleep, I won't sleep. If he'd allow it, we could actually get shit done this time of day.
"A little," I lie. He's just worried. About everything. He always is, which at first was something I loved about him. And usually I still do. It's an admirable trait, to care about someone and love them so much it's only natural to fret over them, to check and make sure they're taken care of properly.
Except it makes me feel guilty.
"Oh yeah? What time?" He asks, narrowing his sleep swollen eyes at me.
Details. Fuck.
"Ah, uh- I don't know, I wasn't looking at the clock," I say sheepishly, trying to flash a disarming smile and make my own bags look like ones of bare minimum rest instead of self neglect. Mike's jaw tightens slightly.
"Oh?" He says in a dull voice that is not raised, yet managed to ring throughout the room nonetheless.
I hum affirmatively, pressing my lips together and fiddling with the cheap pen in my hands, glancing down at it in an attempt at trying not to give myself away.
"Yeah, I don't know. Just like, laid my head on the book and... y'know... drifted off for a couple hours," I try to say casually.
"Ah," he says as though that were enough, leaning now against the doorframe of the hallway, looking at the other wall as though the paint were interesting. "How long after I went to bed, do you think?"
Keep your breathing even. He can smell fear. "Like, a couple," I answer with a shrug.
"Or, like, not at all," he says, turning his head back to stare down at me with a glare.
"I slept," I insist.
"Bullshit. You give me unnecessary detail about your shits post mexican take-out, but you can't tell me what time you fell asleep?" He says accusingly.
"I was asleep! I'm sorry, do you want me to lie and give some time because you need it for some reason?" I ask evenly, shrugging as though to ask what he'd like me to say, blinking at him and adding a tired tinge of a croak to my voice to match his.
"I'm sorry?" He asks, eyes still in narrow slits yet somehow widening slightly, his leg uncrossing from over the other and planting firmly on the floor as he stands straight.
He's not that tall. Kinda short. But he looks much bigger when mad. Kinda like an iguana. I told him that one time and got bit. Jokingly, of course. It's not like he'd just reach over and sna- You know what? Irrelevant.
"I'm just saying," I say, starting to turn back to my notebook as though the conversation were finished.
"No-no, I'd like to hear that again," he says. I can hear his footsteps pad against the flat, tan carpet, my shoulders stiffening slightly as I train my decreasingly neutral eyes on the wrinkled, lined paper in front of me. "I liked the part where you made me sound like some insecure teenager for calling you out on your shit. Very original."
My lips press into a thin line, my grip on my pen tightening slightly.
"It's not that serious, Mikey-"
"Don't bullshit me, and don't use some cheap nickname as a cop out via sympathy," Mike snaps, standing now on the opposite side of the table, pressing his hands now against the glass surface that dirties so easily. Trust me, we've had to clean some prints off of it.
There's a line, and at some point I'm going to cross it. The problem is it's hidden under mental sand that makes me unclear of exactly where it is.
"Michael-"
"That's formal," he says, leaning forward on the table, his tone the same as an interrogating mother just waiting for the moment where no one will blame her for finally tearing you to shreds for what you've said to her outwardly innocent statements. A trap.
"I'm sorry, I thought you didn't like cheap nicknames?" I say, fighting the irritation in my voice, barely managing to remain even as I click my pen to begin writing.
"What's wrong with just Mike?" He asks. He reaches across the table, placing all five of his fingertips on my paper firmly and dragging it back across the table towards him, withholding it from me.
"Would you like me to use just Mike?" I ask.
"I'd like you to make eye contact while you lie through your fucken teeth," he says calmly, not moving as he continues to stare me down.
"Okay, Mike. And what exactly does my sleep schedule mean to you?" I ask slowly, trailing my eyes from his hand, slowly up his arm with pronounced veins and muscles, to the white cotton shirt that was two sizes too large and usually what he wore to sleep in, until I meet his dark and slightly hateful eyes.
"We had a conversation," he starts.
"A conversation," I repeat.
"About a month ago, do you remember?" He asks, cocking his head slightly in that way it does when we both know I'm not going to dare to answer with anything other than he wants.
"You ha-"
"I had a concern," he interrupts me, now looking down at the notebook and studying it as though it were a piece of fine art. "Which involved how absolutely awful your ability is to take care of yourself properly."
"Mike-"
"Shut. Up." Mike says with disturbing calmness. "I'm talking."
Fine.
"It's fucking rude."
Not saying it's not.
"Like your attitude when I try to just help you because clearly, you can't help yourself," he says, now slapping down the notebook to gesture at me as though it were obvious why he was concerned.
I could speak. I'd like to. And he gives me a long enough silence I could. But instead I decide I will simply give him the floor.
"No opinion on this?" He asks shortly.
"No," I say with a dismissive shrug. "You seem to have them for me."
Mike laughs at this statement, and if the sparkle in his eyes didn't seem to have the same dull shine as the glass table between us I'd feel a bit better about it. But I think there's a six foot hole in the backyard I just signed a lease on that makes his disturbingly convincing smile much more worrisome.
"You're funny," he says affectationately. "Get up."
"What?" I ask, blinking.
"Are you deaf now? Up," he says in irritation, beginning to cross back around the table. "This isn't a negotiation."
Before I can speak his hands dig in under my armpits, roughly pulling me to stand and bringing me close to his chest. I should have energy to fight back, I've only been sitting after all. But a physical confrontation would be too loud, first of all. Abby is asleep in her room, and I don't want to make a scene to wake the poor child. Number two, my bones are sore, my head is aching and I generally just do not feel well enough to protest. Physically.
"Put me down, you son of a bitch!"
Verbally, I'm fine.
"You're going to bed, that's final!"
"I have twelve drafts due that I have to get done or else this project-"
"You have four hours of sleep you can get before you have to take your candy ass to work in the fucken morning, or else I'm gonna beat it into you," he hisses directly in my ear, his breath cold and loud so close to me. Jesus, fuck. What did his parents feed him as a child? It shouldn't be this easy for him.
"Oh, I don't do what you want and now you threaten physical violence. Very mature," I mock, reaching out to grip the doorframe of Mike's bedroom, purely to piss him off.
"Save me the dramatics," he snaps in a whisper, wrapping one arm tighter around my waist and using the other to bat my hands away from the frame. I can tell he's genuinely trying not to hurt me, his grip on one wrist firm but careful.
"Just let me write one page," I try.
"That's what you said last night," he says, still trying to pull my hand away. My nails have dug into the frame, making it slightly harder. I can sense his irritation growing. "You got two hours of sleep."
"That's not going to kill me," I argue.
"You haven't slept for more than two hours in a week," he says.
One nail breaks against the frame, making me lose my grip and sending pain down my arm from the awkward angle at which the pressure had snapped it off. I wince slightly, which gives Mike slight pause as he checks my hand, but decides I'm alright before he begins dragging me towards the bed in earnest.
"Why is it so hard for you to just take care of yourself?" Mike asks in frustration.
"I take care of myself!" I say defensively. Mike drops me onto the bed, standing in front of me to prevent any new attempts at escape.
"No, you don't," he says, quiet but firm. "You sit and stare at your notebook and you don't do anything else if you can help it. You sleep for two hours, you go to work, you hardly eat, you don't have energy anymore." Mike's hands are planted firmly on his hips, his nostrils flailing as he tries to take collected, calm breaths. "I care about you. Why can't you?"
"Michael-"
"Stop!" Mike snaps, groaning and turning away from me with a sharp spin on his heel. He buries his hands in his hair in frustration, now pacing between the bed and the door, quietly shutting it so we can argue in peace.
"Why are you so upset?" I ask, genuinely confused.
"Because I don't want to see you live like this. I am concerned and every time I bring it up you dismiss me, you joke, you don't care and I hate that," Mike says, temporarily stopped in his tracks to point at me as he seethes. "I'm watching you waste away and you know what? I'm starting to think part of you likes it."
"Excuse me?" I say, astounded. I cross my arms in front of my chest, cocking my head at him in a way to say 'I dare you to repeat that.'
"You heard me," Mike says, taking a step towards me. "It's like you cannot for one iota of a second conceive of some world where taking care of yourself is a good use of your time. You work, and work until you've burned yourself out so horribly you rot in bed for a month. And unless you're staying here, I hear nothing from you. Not a call, not a fuck you or whatever. It's like you're punishing yourself."
"Now who's being dramatic?" I say.
"See? I can't even point this out without you getting defensive, which just shows you know you're in the wrong!" Mike turns away from me once more, resuming his path of restless walking.
"Why do you even care?" I ask genuinely. This makes him pause again, his glare once more returning to me as he mentally questions my intelligence.
"You know what, I don't know!" Mike snaps, his voice gaining volume. "You are insistent in this fucking- slow method suicide and I'm trying to help you, but you won't let me!"
"I never asked you to care," I scoff, rolling my eyes.
"I never asked to care!" Mike nearly shouts, leaning in close to my face and sneering at me.
This breaks the tension.
His face falls as soon as the words are out of his mouth, his eyes widening slightly like my own eyes. This comment shouldn't really sting. I shouldn't let it. But it does. And for a moment, I do. And he sees that clearly.
"... oh," I say softly, my arms relaxing and shoulders sagging ever so slightly as I drop his gaze, trying to shut off my emotions before they're obvious.
"I'm sorry," Mike says quickly, stumbling to his knees in front of me. "I didn't mean that-"
"It's fine," I say, trying to remain as blank as my pages on the kitchen table.
"I just said it to be hurtful," Mike says quickly, his hand reaching up to cup my face. I take it away, turning my head to the side slightly. There's a new chill in the air, one I can feel seizing my chest.
"You weren't," I say. "I'm going to sleep."
"Please, I don't want-"
"I'm going to sleep," I say forcefully, shoving him away and turning to begin undressing from my work clothes that I still wore. Mike is silent behind me, probably thinking, and I'm close to not being able to hold myself together anymore.
"Get out!" I snap, flinging my shirt at him in a rage and beginning to stand from the bed to chase him out. He doesn't need anymore prompt, quickly scurrying out from the room to wherever it is he'll sleep now. Probably on the couch even though there's another room down the hall. A self induced punishment. Knowing him he probably won't even allow himself a blanket or pillow, feeling the cold air fitting for his selfishness.
Good.
-
When I wake that morning, I can smell breakfast in the air. My stomach hurts from skipping meals, but I don't want to eat. First of all, I haven't worked for a meal. There's still plenty to be done with my drafts. And food is a good encouragement to keep working. Second, I didn't ask him to care. And he didn't ask for it either. There probably isn't enough for me, and if there is, he and Abby can debate between the two who will have it. I need to shower.
I take forever washing myself. If that's what you want to call it. It was moreso standing under hot water, letting it run cold until I couldn't stand it anymore and hoping my deodorant is able to do some heavy lifting today. I barely have enough time to get to work, passing silently by Mike and not turning when he calls my name, walking out the door as fast as I can without running.
He follows me outside, something shaking in a bag behind me. When I finally open my car door I'm forced to have my gaze in his direction, his body between the door frame and my car door, presenting me with a bag of lunch.
"Please eat," he begs, placing the bag in my lap unceremoniously and then quickly stepping away and shutting the door himself.
There's a small moment where he and I just share at each other through the glass, time slipping away without notice. He hasn't slept, he'll be late for work if he doesn't get dressed soon, and the bag on top of my thighs is warm. Fresh. A petty part of me wants to roll down my window and throw away the meal, back out of the drive way and let that fester in his mind out of hate. He thinks words can hurt? Actions are so much worse.
But there's something in his eyes. Defeated, resigned. Childlike is almost the word I could use. In front of my car is the 12 year old boy who tried to chase down his brother, the 18 year old who decided to sacrifice his life raising his little sister while saying goodbye to his parents, and the 27 year old man who's just trying to keep everything together.
I don't know what to say to this child. Or to the man.
So, with the turn of my key in the ignition, I don't.
-
It's late when I come home. When the manager had asked me to stay late I almost called Mike to break the silence and tell him this. But there was still a part of me that didn't care whether or not he knew. Really, I didn't have to return home tonight. I could go back to my apartment and just let him rot in bed the way he claims I do. How could he say such a thing, anyways? I rot in bed? What about the days I've walked into the house and he hasn't slept all week, where he's claiming he's trying to kick his medication and he'll get the hang of it soon. Where his sister is eating every meal almost burnt because he can't think straight enough to remember time. Where I've had to coax, beg, demand of him that he just takes a pill because he's laying on the side of the bed, small and curled in on himself, dead eyed and obviously tired but still not sleeping. One time I slipped it into his food. And I felt awful. Do not think for a moment I wanted to do that. There was a betrayel in his eyes when sleep began to overtake him. I hoped he wouldn't notice, but he must've. Some tell in the drugs effect that made him aware his rest was not voluntary. But I didn't care. I stroked his hair through the night, and I'll do it again. He could hate me however long he needed to, he just needed sleep first.
The irony still hasn't struck me when I walk through the door of his house, well past dinner, Abby in the bath. The door was left unlocked, which is unusual for this time of night. Mike jumps from the couch the minute I open the door, standing with his hands by his side anxiously pulling at the edge of his oversized sweater.
Everything's oversized with him. The thought occurs to me that his father was slightly bigger.
"Don't leave me," he says quietly, his voice small and pathetic like him. But I don't say that with hate.
"I just got home," I say. "Be a bit odd to leave again."
I try a smile, but it's artificial and we both know it's only for his comfort. It doesn't touch him, his eyes glassy and lips slightly parted the same way a child's is when they're trying to breathe as their sinuses spring to life in wake of forming tears.
"I didn't mean it," he says, still standing in the same place. If I was a better person I'd probably run to him. But I'm not.
If I were a better person, I'd say I believe him. But I don't. And suddenly my throat is swollen with hurt, my own bottom lip is sticking out and now we're both trying not to cry because this is so overly taxing. We're adults but emotions are hard. Vulnerability is hard. It is a damnation that we both detest, both avoid. In better states we would joke about this, would laugh and tease the other for not having the emotional capability to voice our thoughts. But we're not. So we don't. And now we're crying openly in the off-putting, attempted to look cozy living room that we can never fully relax in.
"I don't wanna lose you," he says between small hiccups, hands now balled into fists that he buries under opposite armpits, shifting his weight so that he doesn't look so small. His glances bounce between me and the hallway table, never fixing on either of us as he tries to state his mind like an adult. "I've barely had you."
In my heart there has been a constant ache, hurt flowing and pumping through my veins like the blood that ran cold last night at his hurtful words. His apologetic words make the ache somehow worse.
"I don't mean to be a burden to you," I say softly, feeling a small, stray tear break the fluid barrier of my waterline to race down my cheek, allowing a pathway to the fatter drops that threaten to quickly follow.
Mike's face shifts, stepping towards me and holding out his arms.
"No, never," he says just as soft, trying to comfort me. I freeze as he approaches, my body stiffening as I try to swallow the lump and convince myself that I can survive his touch. His touch that I normally crave the moment I'm around him, that I seek in the dark of night even when the bed is overheating, that I'd go insane without.
"I've never asked you to care," I say, voice breaking and tears rolling freely now.
"I know," he says into my neck, which is wetting as he shakes around me, his grasp firm and careless of whether or not it's too much.
"I don't mean to cause problems. I just...." I don't know what I mean, how I wish to finish the statement. If I was clever, I could. If I was clever, I wouldn't even be in this problem to begin with.
"I'm just scared," he chokes out, his breathing horrible as he struggles to keep his crying from being obvious. "You look sick all the time and I don't want that."
He's told me the story. His mother wasting away, thinning and slipping, starving and dying. How he'd returned home to a baby wailing in her crib as their mothers body lay in a pool of blood he never really got out of the carpet. He lied to me initially when I saw it the first time, said it was wine. It wasn't until we had a few glasses ourselves that his eyes glazed over and he told me. It was disturbing how neutral he kept himself to the subject. A habit he'd developed much too long ago to break.
"Mike-"
"I try, and I try and if something doesn't give soon I'm gonna fucking lose it," he sobs into my skin, arms tightening around me.
"If what doesn't give?" I ask softly, trying to pull him away to look into his eyes. But he doesn't budge, sobbing a little bit harder and gripping a little bit tighter. He doesn't respond, simply shaking as he breathes heavily against me through his mouth.
"Hey," I say softly, trying to wrap my arms around him, failing and giving up as I realize his grip is too tight. "I'm not going anywhere."
His mouth closes a little, quieting his breathing slightly as he sniffles.
"I'm an idiot, but I'm not suicidal," I say softly, trying again for a joke. He doesn't laugh, but he does pull away slightly to look at my face, lips swollen and quivering as he blinks at me.
"You scare me," he says quietly, not quite meeting my eyes. He's watching my lips, but I think that's because that's the closest he can get to making eye contact.
"I scare you?" I ask, furrowing my brows. I lick my dry, cracked lips for comfort. "Why?"
"Because I love you," he says shakily, sighing as though it were exhausting to admit while still holding that nervous flicker in his eyes. "Because when I think about not being with you the house seems colder. And I can't go back to hating this house."
I open my mouth to respond, but there's more.
"Because I love your stupid smile when you're excited, or how you do that cricket leg thing when you're falling asleep. Or how if you want my attention you'll bury your head in my chest and pretend you're doing it in your sleep even though I won't judge you for doing it while you're awake."
"I don't-"
"I love how defensive you get over things like that," he says, bringing one hand to cup my cheek, resting his thumb that smells like the creamy lavender handsoap next to the bathroom sink on my lips. "I love how you look waking up next to me, how you play with Abby. And for a really long time I didn't see myself ever having kids, but when I see you curling her hair at the kitchen table I think maybe it wouldn't be so bad if I just took up another job and saved money so that we could-"
"Mike-"
"Stop cutting me off," he says gently, his eyes finally meeting mine with just the smallest smile. "It's rude."
At that I do stop, my body finally relaxing into his grasp as I lean into him and his touch.
"I want things I haven't wanted since before Garret went missing," he says, stroking my lip. "And I want them with you."
Dinner was just as delicious as lunch, even if it was late. And the bed is soft like our voices as we make plans for years down the line. And after a week long break, the pages are finally filled once again.
Just like us.
                             ¤▪︎{♧}▪︎¤
Literally had a come to Jesus moment while writing this that not only do I fear being vulnerable irl, but in writing too. Nearly threw up while writing this. Book aable feet.
Taglist:
@cassiecasluciluce @gh0u1ishly @joshhutchersons-slut @schmidtsbimbo @sugarevans @wompwompwomp57 @jhutchissupercool . Thank you for your support pookies!!! <3
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