#if u hate it im semi sorry

[bittwitchy]

i have to pause bc i broke my likes again the spam will continue in like 10-20 mins lol

k to break up my blondie spam ima go spam rb a bunch of my edits from my old rp so if u dont like that i dont wanna hear abt it :)

[oceanwithouthermoon]

one of the WORST things i see in fandom/ship discourse is when people say "straight ships just dont sit right with me.." like hey.. what do u mean by that.

ESPECIALLY if we're talking about GIRLS who EXCLUSIVELY like mlm ships... i dont care what you say, i think youre fetishizing gay men and youre weird for this. (same thing with guys who exclusively ship wlw but i see that less in fandoms.)

but then, on the other side of this we get people calling them "heterophobic.." NOOOO THAT ISNT REAL IM LITERALLY RIPPING MY HAIR OUT THAT IS NOT A THING.

its not "straightphobic," in fact its literally more homophobic than anything (do not deny that its super fetishy, we all know that its fetishization so dont play dumb..)

(im not saying u have to ship straight ships btw i literally dont care, ship what u want, im SPECIFICALLY talking about people who hate on them, call them toxic because theyre straight, comment on every post that their gay ship is better, etc.. generally just people who are super annoying and fetishy about it. not just people who ship what they ship.. the thing im talking about is basically watered down fujoshis..)

[yeojagroup]

had my dad help me contact my pcp because i took all the medications they prescribed me since seeing them last week and i'm still. not feeling 100% ... i got tested for strep & covid which came back negative but. my blood pressure was low and my pulse was very high, and because i'd told my pcp my symptoms were: fever, all over body aches, a headache, etc she suggested i was dehydrated and i was still feeling run down because of the flu vaxx/covid shot i got. they will probably not get back to me today

[honestlywtfisgoingon]

GET A LITTLE LOUD. I DON’T MIND.

—WITH GOJO SATORU

REMEMBER: THE CLASSROOMS AT JUJUTSU HIGH AREN’T EXACTLY SOUNDPROOF…

content: teacher!gojo, teacher!reader, husband!gojo, smut, unprotected sex, p in v, semi-public sex, against the wall, over the desk, creampie, gagging, panty-theft, use of names slut and whore, not proofread

notes: i’m back this is crazyyyy!! i literally wrote every other day and thought about posting but i never finished anything and then all of a sudden it’s been years :O and im back w gojo brainrot. p.s. obi content is still coming but u just gotta be patient sorry i literally am so rusty

words: 3374

“toru! they’re gonna hear you, not me!” you worried your words wouldn’t get past the lewd sounds gojo was making as he rammed his dick in and out of your pussy. he did all this while holding you against the wall of the classroom— where anyone could come in.

“oh, i’m not worried about getting us caught” each of his words was let out between harsh moans, breath heavy as he kept his open mouth pressed against your neck. so he did hear your concern, it just made absolutely no difference to him. there wasn’t even a stutter in his pace, set hard and fast as soon as he slipped inside you only a bit ago.

“then why’re you covering my mouth?” one of his large hands smothered the entire bottom half of your face, but you managed to squeeze your words through the small sliver of space between gojos long fingers just like before.

“because i can actually stop myself from screaming. can you?” he was taunting you, sure, but the truth in it had you blushing. you were a little embarrassed of how easy it was to get a sound out of you. it was hard for you to keep everything in when you were naturally so vocal, and it only got harder the closer you were to coming. satoru always loved the moment he could see your conscious efforts to stay quiet become entirely abandoned in pleasure. once you couldn’t hold back, neither did he, fucking you as hard as he could, until he wrung out every little praise, and whimper, from your pretty throat. when you couldn’t help but shout his name for everyone to hear was his favorite, and he hated having to smother all the noises that always turned him into a horny teenager. he didn’t hold back his own grunts and groans though, letting them out freely in the classroom, which you didn’t think was very fair.

“that’s n-aah!” you couldn’t help but prove him right, a high-pitched moan jumping from your throat when he lifted you up, only to slam you back down where he was waiting to meet your hips a particularly eager thrust of his own.

“mhmm there it is.” he gave a smug little laugh that was always so familiar coming from him. satisfied that he had proven his point, he went back to making sure you kept quiet. instead of using his hands to muffle you this time, he smothered them with his own deep groan through a passionate kiss.

it didn’t help your case that your only response was an increasingly dazed look in your eyes. he clapped a large hand over your mouth again as you clung to him for dear life. your nails scraped at the back of his expensive dress shirt, feeling the muscles of his back react to the sensation. you raked them up to the softly shaved snow on his nape, pushing another groan out of him. only one of satoru’s hands were free, but he was doing the work for both of them. sometimes your husband was gentle and soft during sex— this was not one of those times. there was nothing sweet about how he groped your ass, gripping and kneading at the skin harshly. every so often one of his fingers brushed against your unoccupied hole while his palms spread your ass slightly.

gravity had you feeling like he was fucking his cock into you well past your pussy. you felt a pleasurable shock each time he hit that perfect spot, shooting up your body. how could it not feel that good with the way you met him with every bounce on his pretty cock. you both got closer and closer, but not quite there. you knew from the beginning that would be short, but you two couldn’t resist a quickie. honestly, you couldn’t resist any opportunity to fuck.

the truth is, he meant it when he said he really didn’t care about being caught from all the noise, but he also didn’t like that getting caught meant having to stop before he could make you finish.

even deeper than that desire, the one he didn’t want to admit just yet, was his possessive need. satoru wanted to keep those pretty little screams all to himself. he figured that he was the one helping you make them, he should be the one who decides that only he gets to hear them. people could still know just who was claiming you by his own pornographic professions of pleasure. Maybe he would let you cry out in the end to reward you, if only because he wanted to hear you say his name like you always did.

to get you there, he was going to have to go just a little harder to push you over the edge. chasing both of your highs, he used all that famous speed of his to switch positions and bend you over the desk. it all happened so fast that even if he slipped out, you didn’t feel it.

the new angle already allowed him to go deeper, but it also allowed you to arch your back. satoru didn’t moan, he whined at the sight. he always loved seeing just how far you’d bend for him— literally. it made his cock throb inside of you, the blood pulsing through the veins along his shaft that were making each drag against your walls take you closer to heaven.

still muting you but no longer having to hold you up, he used a free hand to bully your clit as well as your hole. there was so much sap dripping down from your pussy, making the noise that rang out everytime your ass and his hips met even more vulgar. he easily gathered up some of the wet mix of both your juice and his precum on two of his fingers removing his hand from your mouth only to shove his fingers in instead.

“mmm fuck baby, taste yourself. taste us.” you gagged on them, the choking sound canceling out the much louder whines you were about to make.

he desperately tore off his blindfold, shoving it in your mouth as a gag and telling you to play with your pussy. even before his hand could grip your hips though, you were already meeting his thrusts.

he gripped your hips with his large hands, squeezing your body beneath him, “oh shit. yeah yeah please. keep slamming that ass back on me princess. please please please.” he begged as if he was at your mercy, even though his inescapable grip was the only thing keeping you from falling limp. he grit his teeth, feeling you tighten around him. you went from throbbing to squeezing him like a vice as your orgasm suddenly shocked through you. you shook, your knees knocking a bit as you used your last bit of strength to push back on him, feeling as much of his cock as you could while you creamed on it. your eyes rolled back almost like they were compensating for the screams you couldn’t let out.

as sensitive as you were, satoru wasn’t done yet.

“so so close, hold out princess.”

the gag slipped from your slacked jaw, but you bit your lip to stop any noise that came from the sensitivity. you nodded and satoru petted your head and smiled. with just your lip to stop you from making noise and you so close to coming, satoru didn’t give a shit about volume anymore. you were about to let out some of the sluttiest moans like you always do when you come, and he wasn’t gonna miss them for anyone. “You know what? get a little loud. i don’t mind,” just before ramming in so hard that he knocked over the desk. the last of your moans morphed into a panicked scream, mingled with the crash and bang of the desk falling, along with all the objects on it. you were nearly one of those things if satoru hadn’t tightly gripped your hips and your neck, keeping you fused together. so much was happening, but he made sure that you were right where you needed to be for him to pour all his cum inside you. it seemed that after everything, your voice couldn’t handle much more than a little whimper when you felt all his hot, thick cum filling you up. you always tightened your legs out of instinct to hold it all in, and it also helped you keep standing as he shuddered, letting a long stream of broken groans and eventually whimpers just by your ear. he wanted so badly to take his time watching his cum drip out of your hole just to gather every drop not inside you on his fingers and shove it back in. you always begged for his cum huh? he’d be a bad husband if he didn’t give you all of it.

shit. his mind cleared he assessed the damage less than a moment after. even with all this clutter on the floor, at least he didn’t add his cum to it he thought. still, the biggest mess was between your legs, and he couldn’t help but feel a little proud about the two of you.

he immediately picked you up like a ragdoll and sat you down on a desk. you still felt your tongue threaten to loll out but you threw a leg over his shoulder out of instinct, giving him access between your legs to clean up the slick that covered your sex and thighs with his blindfold. it was already covered in spit anyway.

“fuck. someone definitely heard that” he murmured during his rushed clean up.

“who’s fault now huh—“ you were cut off by satoru’s reaction to hearing approaching steps he yanked you forward to button your shirt as you realized the person was running, very, very fast. you were both so relieved that you still had your skirt and he still had his pants on, leaving you one less thing to trip over. while he fumbled with your clothes you zipped up his pants and buckled his belt. gojo had just finished the very important task of checking to make sure no cum was leaking past your panties before yuuji came bursting through the door. you immediately hopped off the desk and smoothed down your hair and your skirt, while gojo tried to pass off his ruffled hair by acting like he’d been running his hand through it.

“hey, are you guys ok? we thought we heard something crash.” yuuji eyes darted to the desk on the floor, completely missing the raging blush on gojos face and the slight wobble in your knees. he opened his mouth to ask only to be shoved through the door when nobara came in hot behind him.

“hey! i thought we were all gonna check it out!” she scolded him with her whines.

“not my fault you’re slow!” he defended.

finally megumi strolled in, looking as nonchalant about the whole thing as he could be, in great contrast to his best friends.

“students!” you turned to satoru as he addressed them enthusiastically, “your teachers were just training and made a bit of a mess.” wow. that excuse just…well it sucks. you almost wanted to roll your eyes but had to do a double take. where did he get his glasses from? when did he put them on? leave it to gojo to keep his accessories on hand. it did help distract from how puffy and pink his lips were as he spoke.

“you were fighting in here?” yuuji tilted his head in question. combined with his big brown eyes, his actions had him looking like a puppy.

“it was impromptu.” you bolstered gojos excuse while trying not to cringe at how bad it was to begin with.

“ooh were you like couple fighting?” nobara jumped in with her question. it seemed she was way too intrigued by the prospect of drama to question how much sense it actually made, and you had absolutely no objections to that right now.

“wait things can get that heated to where you battle??” oh yuuji. he asked as if nobara knew all there was to know about the subject.

“no, no!” you waved your hands frantically, only to be completely tuned out once the two kids entered the mode of conspiracy. they talked lowly but didn’t whisper, as if you couldn’t hear them literally talking about you five feet away.

“i mean they totally look like they got into it.” nobaras chin was between her thumb and pointer finger while her eyes narrowed in inspection, yuuji mimicking her actions. after a second of tapping her cheek, she pointed directly at her sensei, making you and satoru almost jump a little bit. wow you had to get a hold of yourself. “no offense, but you should probably fix your hair.” nobara stated bluntly. gojo pouted. you thought he was adorable but also made a note to compliment his hair later.

megumi had been silent, not even really looking at you or the mess. his eyes just wandered the walls until it seemed like something clicked in his braim. his eyes darted back and forth between you and gojo. suddenly rolling his eyes letting out an exasperated “oh my god,” megumi just dragged a hand over his eyes and his face. he wasted no time turning around and walking away, seeming absolutely done with you two.

he caught nobaras curiosity and had her chasing him out the door and down the hall where you could hear her calling out “hey! hey, fushiguro come back!”

“hey wait what’s he talking about.” yuuji looked increasingly confused as he followed suit.

you almost slumped in relief you were so tired and you had to put effort into standing straight and not just falling into gojo. he looked at your relieved and tired face with a goofy smile. that smile. it disappeared as soon as you started slapping his arm.

“sa-to-ru!” a slap accompanied each syllable. “that was the worst excuse ever! there’s no way they’re not going to figure it out!” your hands kept slapping his bicep, but were just as quick to wrap around it right after. you pressed your cheek against the expensive cotton sleeve as you hugged his arm tightly and pouted just like he did as you looked up.

“c’mon let’s be real here, megumi would rather die than discuss our sex life with his friends. plus, we’re married, princess. i’m pretty sure a husband fucking his wife is like, the least surprising thing ever.” he rolled his eyes as he turned to wrap his arms around your waist, your hands resting on his chest.

“what about itadori? i’d hate for that kid to lose his innocence,”

“innocent? that kid is a self-proclaimed ass man.” taking advantage of the subject, one of satorus own hands came to rest on your ass. you quirked a brow but he pretended not to see your face and just continued, “i also saw a pinup poster in his room,”

“wait, really?” you stopped and shook your head a bit, like it would help you refocus on what you remembered you were talking about, “oh but still, toru, i know they know we have sex but—“

“but what?” he sighed, waiting for your most definitely poor reasoning.

“i don’t know, just” you started blushing and he knew that little embarrassed look. he knew you always liked to play the good girl, to hold on to your pride. if it didn’t make for such a fun game he’d say it’s a total waste of time knowing, without fail, he’d have you on his leash in minutes (literally or metaphorically depending on what your setting allowed). a single long finger tilted your chin up, his face suddenly so close to yours.

“oh you’re not worried about them finding out about my wife being fucked, you're worried about them finding out that she likes to be fucked like a slut.” such crude words came out in delicate breaths that fanned across your face.

“no!” your voice died out instantly when he pulled you a little closer again, your noses now touching instead of just your breath.

“hard enough for the desk to fall and loud enough to scream.” you had had sex minutes ago, and even worse, had almost gotten caught, and yet he was saying and doing everything to make your pussy throb all over again. you were always so easy for him to play with, never offering any real objections despite your attitude. “yeah? you don’t want them to know how desperate you are, how you just couldn’t keep your legs closed until we got home? because that’s all you want, isn’t it.” he whispered in your ear, your eyes fluttering back with chills. the sensation of him placing kisses on your neck brought you back to your senses once again.

“please, as if you didn’t run around the whole school just to say you needed ‘help’”

“and you’re suchhhh a good little helper for me, baby,”, he went to kiss you on the mouth you returned it, but as soon as he deepened it, you pushed him away and he had the audacity to look hurt. you were getting whiplash from having to repeatedly pull yourself together just to fall right into his hands again.

“you’ve gotta be fucking kidding me. i swear we almost got caught there’s no way we can go another round. you’re insatiable gojo satoru.”

“mhmm, we both are, mrs. gojo satoru.” he tapped your nose before lowering his voice once again. “so, how bout i take these panties, and we go home when my cum is about to leak past your skirt, huh?”

“fine. deal.” you huffed, but spread your legs quickly. he went on one knee to pull your panties down, enjoying the picture of your pussy and leaving a kiss on your clit which made you hiss, before he had the fabric dropping to your ankles. you stepped out of them and he swiftly pocketed them.

“i love my wifey so much!” he stood up and kissed you with a cute smile as if he hadn’t just shove your panties down his pants.

“that’s good because love you too toru,” you said softly, hands clasped behind your back and rocking back and forth on your heels with a lovesick look like a schoolgirl. honestly, he never stopped making you feel like one.

“aww so sweet.” he tucked a hair behind your hair, sending butterflies past your stomach and to your whole body, but you just knew that wasn’t all. “who woulda thought you were such a whore?” ah, theres your satoru.

“only for you” you patted his cheek jokingly, but he just groaned with his whole body. he had to do things in the most dramatic way possible of course.

“ugh. baby, you can’t just say things like that and then—“

you pushed him off, leaving him, arms still stretched out reaching for you, even after you walked out the door. he looked at the clock before deciding it was max 30 minutes before you asked to go home. you came back in 10.

— bonus:

“well i mean the honeymoon stage is like that, although it’s annoying and gross.” nobara shrugged while still stirring her boba.

“they’ve been married for 7 years. dated for 10.” megumi responded quietly, nobara consequently spewing her drink.

“no way! they act all starry-eyed and all that stuff still.” yuujis own eyes opened wider in surprise

“yeah that’s what i thought too!” it helped nobara that even yuuji had the same idea too. “ugh now that i know they’re just like that it’s kinda gross.”

“wait megumi if they’ve dated for 10 years, you lived with both of them at the same time, right?” both of megumis friends leaned closer to him, eager to hear where yuujis question went, but he didn't even look at them.

“yeah what about it,” he said as nonchalantly as ever. this was a topic he had always made a point never to dwell on.

“so you had to have heard—“

“okay, that’s enough. we’re never talking about this again.” ideas like yuujis were the exact reason why megumi refused to feel his interest. ideas like yuujis made him want to die from remembering just how many times he accidentally heard the two of you…daily.

“yeah gross, good idea.”

“um yeah, you’re right, don’t answer that actually.”

[leclsrc]

you know it ✴︎ cl16

genre: porn WITH plot (for once?! everyone cheered), humor, bit of fluff... oh inaccurate depictions of the 2022 season sorry

word count: 7k

Charles is a bit disappointed the pretty girl he harbors a crush on doesn’t have him listed as a Formula 1 crush. He is a lot disappointed that you two can’t fuck.

nsfw warnings under the cut!

18+ because... degradation, praise, charles is a bit switchy here lol, penetrative sex, a bit of ass play sorry...., oral (m receiving), semi public sex, yeah

title from this. i love u guys im so sleepy

Joris insists there’s some big present waiting for Charles in his car, to celebrate the middle of the season that has, and will no doubt continue to stretch into a period of conflict and strategy woes. He yanks off the beanie sitting on his head, listens to small talk drifting between Joris and Carlos as they all walk toward their cars to alleviate the bubble of nerves in the low of his stomach. 

Sure enough, there’s an unassuming box lying on the driver’s seat. Joris slides into the passenger seat after Carlos drives away with his girlfriend, his grin shit-eating and mischievous. The door is half open when Charles takes the box to inspect it. White, with the Ferrari logo printed neatly on the centre (very classy touch), the sides are signed by different members of his team. He scratches through the seal and pulls the flap open.

He’s been given a quasi-official Ferrari box of condoms.

Thirty-six condoms, at that, small squares neatly lined up next to each other. Talk about a welcoming present. Not a camera, not racing memorabilia, not a new pair of shoes. Just condoms. Thirty-six of them.

“A mid-season pick-me-up,” presses his friend, giddily. The shorter male lounges comfortably on the seat, a blissful look of pride on his face. Laughing with exasperation, Charles wedges the box shut and tosses it carelessly into the backseat, preparing to drive. This isn’t his first rodeo with weird gifts—he’s half-sure he got adoption papers from an especially excited fan once before.

“You are such an asshole.”

“It’s also a congratulations on winning literally every race so far present,” Joris adds. It’s hyperbole but has a ring of truth to it. As the season closes, Charles’ chances of holding up the trophy this year increase. 

Despite himself, Charles has a better outlook on his chances for the remainder of the season, driving-wise. He’s given it his all so far, and the rest looks promising enough. He only hopes he’s right. Netflix also increased the amount of people getting into the sport, so he’s dealing with tons more fans and nosey DMs, but it’s not too much of an impediment to a hopefully stellar season.

Charles makes a right. “Do you plan to use them?” Joris asks then, a teasing tone taking on his voice as he scrolls through his phone.

“No, not really,” Charles says, lying straight through his teeth.

“You’re a fucking liar, you are.” He whips his head toward Charles, observing his stoic side profile. “You’re single, haven’t gotten laid in months—”

“—weeks.” Corrects Charles with a cough, the defense coming at an embarrassing speed.

“…Case in point. And sports gets everyone horny. And if you didn’t know, Mattia actually OK-ed the condoms, so you’ve basically been greenlit by your boss to fuck half the world. Thank me later. I’m proud of myself.”

“Sports gets everyone competitive. Because it’s sports. Which, you’re conveniently forgetting, is my life profession.”

“Loosen up,” Joris whistles lowly. “You think Lewis got seven titles by being a closed-off celibate? It’s practically tradition to fuck around if you’re single in sports. And, for others, being in a relationship is barely an obstacle, anyway.”

Charles hates to admit that Joris is right—because he is. Racing isn’t racing without the extravagant parties that follow, and the girls and guys brought back to hotels for reasons known to everyone. People from everywhere come to the paddock and the clubs—models, influencers, actors. The pent-up energy has to go somewhere, he supposes.

But even if the little shit is right, Charles still maintains a level of dignity. Ergo, he’s steadfast in his belief that he will not be sleeping around or putting this godforsaken box of condoms to any semblance of use while the rest of the season progresses. He just hopes he won’t eat his words.

—

Monza kicks off with a 1-2 and secures Charles with a comfortable lead ahead Max.

He is high on adrenaline all night, toasting and chugging to the win, snapping pictures with Carlos, proud out of his mind. It’s everything he’s wanted and more, a quench to the thirst he’d developed over the season, a slap in the face to his doubters, a kiss on his. He texts his family, friends who aren’t present, some other people who he feels are deserving of a personal announcement, and pockets his phone.

“Now would be a great time to put that gift to use,” Carlos says at some point, when everyone in the garage is kicking back alcohol and slowly preparing to move the celebrations someplace else.

Charles cringes visibly, having almost forgotten about the dreaded gift, and totally forgotten Carlos’ knowledge of it. Even with the recent win, he’s already thinking of the next, the promise of a two-peat, another podium, hell, another 1-2. The condoms were honest to God the last thing on his mind.

They break apart an hour later, when Charles is heading to the hotel and Carlos is headed somewhere else. He’s almost to the exit when someone calls his attention in a curt English voice.He turns and finds Lewis jogging toward him, outside of his race suit and back in the fashionable apparel Charles merely wishes he could pull off.

“Lewis,” he waves, pacing toward him to save the extra few seconds of waiting. 

“Amazing, amazing race, man,” the elder compliments. “You’ve got the best chance at the title here.”

Warmth melts into Charles’ body and he offers praise back, which—praising Lewis is just about the easiest thing in the world. Nerves bleed out of him as the conversation continues, the atmosphere of a finished race a welcome accompaniment to their strategic talk. 

“Headed to a party, yeah?” Lewis asks when they’ve both exhausted the topic. Charles gives a half-hearted shrug, already energized enough from such a momentous win, and he nods in response. “Nah, I get it. Sometimes you just gotta sleep. But hey, if you’re ever free, we should go get dinner sometime.”

—

The “dinner sometime” happens in Singapore. Having gotten P1 beside Lewis and therefore once again high off the adrenaline, Charles claps Andrea on the back and retrieves his phone to view two texts. One reads Put the condoms to use yet, champ? from Joris, and the other Can I take you up on the dinner? from Lewis. One goes answered and the other goes muted on his iMessage.

A little something he failed to remember was Lewis’ plant-based diet, a fact that hurtles back toward him when he can’t find steak on the menu of this classy, hole-in-the-wall type of restaurant. Of course Lewis would know these types of places, he thinks. He’s a millennial semi-hipster with a separate Instagram account for his dog.

Charles ends up ordering pasta, and Lewis beside him orders a cacophony of very vegan, hippy sounding meals, the quantity of which could feed the two of them. “I hope you don’t mind,” Lewis says when the waiter departs, “but a friend is actually joining us tonight.”

“Sure,” Charles says honestly. As long as it’s not some deranged hyperfan, he does well in social situations. Right then, Lewis calls someone over. Charles looks up, squints through the dim mood lighting to try and make out the nearing figure. And then you’re sitting down across them, smiling softly, exchanging hellos with Lewis.

A little something Lewis fails to remember is his “friends” can just as well be called “celebrities,” because he is, after all, a sporting legend. So if Lewis says “friend,” Charles will assume it’s a “friend,” and not a world-famous model whose face is plastered everywhere on and offline.

“Charles Leclerc,” he says blankly.

You introduce yourself, sliding easily into a bout of questions, apologies for missing the race, you’re impossibly jetlagged, it’s crazy. Lewis chips in with something about how he’s already ordered food for the both of you, and this and that, and Charles is hopeless, staring at your face the entire time. He hopes he looks more sexy than aloof or, worse, starstruck, because it’s turning out to be the kind of situation where he looks like the deranged hyperfan, and not the other way around for once.

To be clear, Charles isn’t a fan of you. He just knows of you, because honestly, who doesn’t at this point? You’re talking on and on about how your latest shoot with Jacquemus was a pain because you shot in a tank top in sub-zero weather, but you express it like it’s the most profound topic on Earth.

Lewis turns to him and, in an (eventually successful) effort to include more of Charles in the conversation, goes, “She’s a big Formula One fan, Charles.”

Okay. Common ground. Charles lifts both brows smugly, his eyes flickering back over to you. “Really?”

You meet his eyes and smile, looking downward and blinking owlishly. You’re so pretty, long lashes fluttering as you blink and try to find an answer. Christ, you’re so painfully his type.

Lewis chimes in again—“Really. And not just because she and I are friends. I mean she was into racing before we got acquainted. Honestly. Quiz her and everything”—then excuses himself to “take a call.” (His phone wasn’t even ringing—total bullshit—but Charles is ultimately grateful for it.)

You make a face of shut up toward the departing Lewis, and Charles exhales a quiet laugh at your defiance. You clear your throat and come up with an answer.

“I’m not a big fan,” you say. “I’m more of a casual, ‘every once in a while’ type of fan.”

“That’s what every big fan of sports says,” Charles says smoothly. 

“Is it?” You ask, cocking your head to the side, making a tch noise. You chuckle before going, “Well, if you insist, I’ll be honest. I didn’t want it to come to this, but okay. I am a fan… of Red Bull.”

Charles fakes extreme offense, his jaw dropping as if totally scandalized. You laugh, throwing two hands up in faux surrender. “Not Red Bull,” he says, his tone making him sound even more devastated. “You’re telling me you—don’t tell me you think Max Verstappen is attractive.”

“I mean, a bit!”

Charles makes sarcastic sounds of disapproval, and you laugh. Charles leans forward, and you do, too, both of you smiling. “So you’re into the angry drivers?”

“I’m not into a specific kind of driver,” you say casually, your tongue peeking out to lick over your bottom lip. Your voice is as soft as it is firm, slow and demure, matching the way your eyes glint. You’re impossibly pretty. He almost can’t handle it.

“So who’s making the cut?” He prompts, interested.

“Well, for starters, drivers who are my age,” you say slowly. “I turned twenty-four this year, so anyone within that bracket.”

“Oh?” Charles pretends to delve into deep thought, teasing. “Maybe Stroll? He’s very funny, speaks good English. You can never really say no to a Canadian.”

Your face warms, and you hope your flustered state isn’t too obvious as you shake your head. “He seems fun, but I prefer somebody a bit… a bit older.”

“Older…” he hums. “Pierre, perhaps? Tad bit older, real charming, great driver. I can introduce you. We’re good friends, you know.”

You click your tongue, smiling shyly. You bite your lip and it takes everything in Charles to not turn on his horny gears when he sees you, big eyes and lip bite, look so pretty. “You tease me,” you say meekly. Charles covers a cough with a chuckle and adjusts his position on the seat.

Later, after Lewis comes back in (“Long call, eh? It was about Roscoe.” Bullshit again) and you all get to order drinks, and you’ve departed in your private car, pressing an air kiss to Lewis and waving goodbye to Charles, he turns to the Mercedes driver and hums.

“Next time you have one of these”—he points to the restaurant, gestures to the front door—“dinners, let me know, okay?”

“Ah.” Lewis winks, smirking. “I’ll be sure to.”

—

Understandably, your schedules never seem to mesh well together. Lewis ends up giving Charles your number as compensation.

He stares at the contact longer than he’d like to admit, when he’s marinating in the sweltering heat of Austin. He’s finished much of his work for this half of the day so he’s mostly watching the engineers work on the last bits of modification for Sunday; he cherishest the free time and drafts, reads, and rereads texts, scours Google and Instagram for pictures of, and anything related to, you.

There’s a few new articles about buying a new car (a Benz, much to Charles’ chagrin) and new photoshoots intermittently scattered across Europe, with all sorts of brands. He sees a picture you’ve posted of yourself smiling at the camera and thinks of how pretty it would look as his lockscreen. 

Am I seeing you soon? He texts finally. He hopes it’s enough to let you know who he is.

Hopefully is the reply. He smiles the whole day.

—

You’ve been texting and calling almost everyday, conversations stretching continents. He only sees you next in Mexico, Friday night, at a club Lewis has rented out for a crazy price that will no doubt be replenished in days anyway. He’s dropped to second here, but the thrill riding in him makes up for his disappointment. The place is so crowded—everyone and their mums seem to have been invited here—room blinking purple and blue, each step vibrating with the heavy bass of EDM. He catches you right as you exit the washroom area, and you look pleasantly surprised to see him.

He saw you earlier, when you were doing shots of tequila and chatting with with Bella and Lewis, but just as quickly as he spotted you, you’d dipped back into the sea of people. Now is better, he thinks. You two are alone.

“Charles, hi,” you say casually. You’re wearing a tight top and a short skirt that, despite Charles’ best efforts, always cast his gaze downward. He wonders what’s underneath, hungers to get his hands there. But he’s nothing if he’s not patient, willing to play the long game.

He takes a step forward, his gaze steady on you. Charles isn’t the tallest driver, but he’s got a big presence. You swallow, taking a step back to accommodate him. He smirks. “You look pretty.” 

“You flatter me,” you say thickly, smiling, inviting him closer. The air is hot around the both of you—when your eyes flit around, they see nobody. You’re alone together. His eyes pierce into yours so deep you feel like breaking eye contact, exhaling as you take another step back—evidently, you’re distracted, because you stumble.

His arm circles around your waist, and once you steady, the hand moves down to your hip. It stays, a reminder of what you might be getting soon. You smile curtly, wondering what this might look like to a bystander, a stranger. Somebody might want to piss and walk in to see the strongest world champion contender’s hand on Chanel’s poster girl’s waist.

“Is this okay?” He asks softly against your ear.

“More than.” You say, breath shaky. “It’s more than okay.”

He chuckles. “Good. I’d hate if we couldn’t fuck before Abu Dhabi.”

Your finger traces down and wraps around the belt loop of his jeans. “Who said anything about fucking?”

Charles exhales a laugh, his lips curling upward into an amused smile. “Ah? I can’t fuck you, then?”

“I’ll let you fuck me when you’re holding up the world champion trophy,” you say sweetly, tugging him closer. “That’s okay, right?” You stare up at him, blinking, pouty. He wonders, is this how you might look with your lips wrapped around his—

“That’s about a month away.” His composure barely wavers, his hand traveling lower, blunt nails digging into your ass. Your breath hitches. 

“I’m aware,” you say lowly. So be it, Charles thinks—he’s got thirty-six condoms for a reason.

“Define fuck,” he says, voice rough.

“Penetration.” You’re quick with it, cocking your head to the side. You lean back confidently, testin him, eyes batting flirtatiously. 

It’s time he get a little creative.

—

Daytime weather is hot and the paddock is swarming with people, but Charles has his sights set on somebody sitting in the Mercedes hospitality. He manages to get out of morning meetings earlier, wedging himself out of the room and passing by a mirror to fix his hair with admirable concentration. He’s in the middle of combing through it when a force tugs at the hem of his polo, causing him to stumble backwards.

“Uh—Carlos? What the hell?” He asks, brow raised defensively. Facing him are Carlos, Joris, and Pierre, arms crossed over their torsos and amused expressions on their faces.

“What are you doing?” Asks Pierre, cocking his head to the side.

“Fixing my hair.” 

“Pussy appointment?” Joris interjects; the vulgarity of his statement earns him a poke on the side from Carlos, who clicks his tongue.

“Wh—I don’t—”

“You are shit at lying, mate,” says Pierre, his lips curled into a devious smile. “Who is it?”

“It’s nobody,” he lies.

“Charles,” says Lewis suddenly from behind them, waving his arms to get the former’s attention, “are you going to go over and say hi?”

Hook, line, and sinker. He’s been caught. “Well, well, well,” Carlos starts, mischievous.

“Guys—” Charles says, attempting to make an excuse.

“Looks like your vow of celibacy isn’t so far off after all,” Pierre adds. “That one over at Mercedes is going to break it, eh?”

“Yeah.” Joris says, smirking.  “Lucky George, huh.”

The three face him, incredulous. “I was kidding,” he fibs, once he realizes his epiphany is wrong. “Kidding.”

Charles walks off, and ends up seeing you right where he expected you, sitting beside Lewis in a tiny dress with your hair pinned up into a bun. Almost naturally, your words fall into the flirtatious back-and-forth you’d started at the dinner, hyperaware of the cameras snapping your pictures. At some point, the Brit excuses himself to “take a call” (again, bullshit) and leaves the two of you alone.

“See anything nice on the paddock?”

“Nothing I haven’t seen before,” you say with a teasing smile, head cocking to the side to gauge his reaction. He chuckles.

“Did you get a picture with Max?”

“Only a ton.” You pause. “And Daniel, too.”

“Ah, you’re just crushing on the whole paddock, now are you?” He pokes his tongue into his cheek, leans forward.” Uh, Checo?”

“Pass,” you say with a nose scrunch. You’re so fucking pretty.

“Lewis.”

“God, pass. He’s not ugly, but he’s my brother at this point.”

“Pierre.”

“Horribly French, but… smash.”

“Are you not into the French?” He smiles. “Good to know. Hmm—Carlos.”

“I’d be stupid to say anything other than smash.” You narrow your eyes, licking over your lips. “I’m into the Ferrari guys, is the thing.” His gaze travels to your crossed legs, long and disappearing into the hem of your dress.

He smirks. “Are you?”

“I really am,” you hum.

“Are you staying long? All weekend?”

“Yeah, I’m free from work for now,” you say casually. “Any recommendations on what fun things I can do here?”

“I can think of…” he says, smirking a little. “A few.”

—

Stupid places to have sex, number one: a motorhome.

Still, Charles is crowding you up against the wall of the room, swallowing the whimper that leaves your mouth with his own. And still, this isn’t sex. At least not the kind he wants the most. He mentally praises Carlos for being able to decipher the typo-laden text he’d sent out on the way here, one hand around your waist, the other barely capable of typing with how fast his brain ran. Clesr the fuckng room npw now npw it read. Thank God.

Your mouth tastes like champagne, and everywhere else smells divine. Your hands roam impatiently over his shoulders and you make muted noises of frustration at your inability to pull his shirt off. You settle for letting your hands crawl underneath it, stroking over his abs.

“D’you remember what I told you,” you pant, his lips insistent on your neck, “at the club?”

“Yeah,” he says, grunting at the memory.

“Okay.” You breathe. “Let me suck you off.”

“Fuck,” he groans. “Jesus. Okay. Fuck.”

You giggle, and he watches intently as you drop onto your knees, looking up at him through thick lashes. You’re insistent, pulling the zip of his jeans down and tugging his cock out. It’s pretty, thick like the rest of him, already hard. 

He’s at his limit, having you here like this, on you knees and stretching your lips around the tip of his dick. Your eyes barely leave his, fluttering as they tear up when you take him in your throat.

He throws his head back, squeezes his eyes shut, lets a hand unpin your bun and thread itself into the untangled hair. If he looks at you, he’ll see your head bobbing up and down on his cock, and he genuinely needs to hold off the orgasm first.

He rocks forward into your mouth and feels your throat close up around him. That’s enough to weaken his resolve, send grunts out of his throat that he can’t keep quiet.

“Oh, shit,” he says, feeling every part of your mouth and throat around him, warm and tense. He can’t help but thrust harder, steady but not too rough, growing more aroused with every sound of you choking on him.

His gaze flickers toward you. You’re teary-eyed, lips dotted with spit, choking yourself on his cock. Just for him, here in public. You pull off, blinking tears away from your face and looking up at him smilingly.

He laughs, guiding his cock back into your mouth, watching the way your brows knit together, pleading, almost. You're at his mercy, he thinks, thrusting harder, listening to your coughs. He loves seeing you like this, innocent face messy and slick with spit and precum, eyes big and needy.

“You like that?” He grunts. “Look at me.”

You nod the best you can. Yes, you want to say. Give me more, I love it.

“Yeaaah, fuck. I know you do,” he says through his teeth, staving off his orgasm the best he can before he releases all over you. The image alone of streaking you with his cum, claiming you all over-eyelashes, tits, cheeks splashed with cum-is enough to send him closer to the edge. “Gonna cum,” he grunts.

You moan around him, the vibrations causing his eyelids to flutter. You shake your head, pulling off and wrapping your hand around his dick, stroking slower. “Not yet,” you say sweetly, watching him throw his head back in pleasure and frustration. He runs a hand through his sweaty hair, exhales shakily.

“Shit.” He whines. “Come on, baby. Make me cum.” He cups your jaw, stares down at you.

You stroke him faster, lip between your teeth. “Okay,” you say with a smile. “Cum for me, Charles.”

He stops staving himself off, falls into the pleasure and relief of your hand around his cock until he’s tense all over, knitting his hand into your hair and pushing you backwards so he can press his tip on the flat expanse of your tongue and let his cum shoot there. It drips from your tongue and lips onto your chin and you giggle, swallowing it, scooping up the rest to push into your mouth.

You stand, licking your lips slowly. “I owe you,” he pants, zipping himself up. Already he’s thinking about what he can do to you in return. Tease you, like you did him, bend you over his lap or sit you on it and make you whine and writhe and wait and cum. 

“I’ll hold you to that, champion,” you murmur, kissing his cheek and slipping back outside.

—

Ferrari’s advice is shit and despite his good mood and quick-witted driving, Charles finishes in fifth—not too shabby, but disastrous for his overall standings.

He suffers through a horrible debrief where attempts to defend his honor go unheard, his mood wilting and wilting until he’s at the media pen and ushered in front of some network he hasn’t heard of. They’ve probably paid to get a good seat here.

He’s in a shit mood, he hasn’t seen Joris or Pierre or you in hours, and has only faced red-faced frustrated superiors and now, wide-eyed journalists with loose mouths. The media’s done the mandatory speculation between the two of you, so he already expects questions of that variety, but it’s still hot and angry when he does.

Are you banging the Marc Jacobs model? The Irish reporter asks with a wink, so very unprofessional and not at all belonging to reputable media. The hot leggy one who has fuck me eyes?

Charles clenches his jaw, rolls his eyes, says fuck off mate and shoves him backward a little, then walks away and readjusts his cap. The clip makes Twitter and he feels even worse with the amount of troll accounts telling him to Jeez, take a joke.

After the ordeal, in your hotel room, you sigh softly and run your hands through his still shampoo-smelling hair. “You didn’t need to do that,” you say, a bit strictly. He knows you’re grateful, though, and a bit proud.

“I wanted to,” he insists softly. He forgets to leave before morning; when he does, he forgets his official Ferrari shirt hanging on the seat, leaving in a spare one instead. It’s got his number across the back. You don’t tell him.

—

In between Mexico and Sao Paulo, he manages to catch a flight to New York to peek into one of your photoshoots. It’s for Chanel and he’s half-sure he’s taken more pictures of you than the official photographer did. At this point your vague relationship status has caught onto headlines everywhere, and he doesn’t miss the curious murmurs from paparazzo that follow him as he enters your apartment later to greet you.

You’re in a pair of shorts and a tank top when you open the door, greeting him with a tight hug and leading him inside with a loose grip.

“Wine?”

“Please.” He eyes the wide area, the big floor-to-ceiling windows and the art on the walls. “Hungry?”

“Mmm.” You hum, sliding a glass toward him. “Starving.”

“Pizza?”

“Something else.” You smile. He tears his eyes away from your tits, poking out of the thin cotton, and coughs.

The both of you end up on the couch, your legs draped over his as you talk about racing.

He’s ranting about how he’s neck to neck with Max now, and the final verdict will likely be decided at Abu Dhabi, a fact that sends nerves all through him. You’re listening, you really are, but it’s difficult to keep listening because his hand, big and rough, is stroking your bare calf as he talks absentmindedly. 

You offer the occasional mmm-hmm and uh-huh and even the oh really to sell it, but he doesn’t seem to be conscious of how many sparks are coursing through you because of his hand on your leg. He just talks and talks, accent curving into curse words elicited by the competition.

And his voice, rough and deeper when he slides into Italian phrases, gets in your head, reminds you of the way he’d moaned when you had his dick in your mouth. You like that? he’d said, panting, heavy, hot. His hand remained in your hair, controlling you the same way you did him. Fuck.

When you blink, he’s stopped talking, and has likely noticed your wandering imagination if his teasing smile is anything to go by. You cough, clear your throat, adjust your thighs. You’re thinking—you can’t stop thinking—about what happened in Mexico, not just in the motorhome but in the club where he’d let his hand sprawl over your ass and stay there, possessive.

The tension rises. I owe you. He really does. You reach over and grab your phone from the coffee table, snap a few pictures of him. “—Hey!” He protests, scrabbling to grab it from you while balancing his half-full glass. “I look god awful.”

You stand up, review the picture. He looks so impossibly handsome. “You’re right, you do,” you say, pouting. 

He reaches over again, chuckling, and you avoid him. “Foul play!”

“Tch. At least show it to me,” he says defeatedly, so you do: presenting your screen to him.

Quickly, he makes a grab for it, but you just escape his grip, ending up right in front of him and leaning over. You’re losing your balance, digging your toes into your carpet to maintain stance. He spares a glance at your shorts, riding low on your hips, showing a bit of thin lace.

Charles tugs you forward by the hem of your top and then takes your wrist into his grip—the force of his grab makes your tits shake underneath your flimsy tank top. It’s dragged down so far your tits are spilling out. His eyes flicker down to them, dark, and a pretty smile spreads across his face.

“Come on, give it,” he challenges, eyes narrowing a little. You bite your lip, inwardly liking this a little too much—being at his mercy, trapped in his strong grip. You’re flustered and it shows.

He wrestles you onto his lap with ease, his arms steady around you. You stare downwards, dark eyes meeting his, hand on his broad shoulder for leverage. He’s so pretty, you think, so hot and handsome and you need him right now. Through his jeans you can feel how thick he is, his dick growing, getting hard and huge under you. It feels big even through a few layers—you can’t help but imagine how it might feel inside you.

Your phone clatters to the carpet behind the couch. “I win,” you say breathlessly.

He grabs your hips and jerks his upward, letting his stiff dick press up even more against your shorts.

“I think I’m the winner here,” he says gruffly, hands feeling you up all over. He thumbs at your chest, rubbing over your tits. You shiver—it feels good having him on you like this, your mind turning to mush.

“Shut up,” you laugh, shakily. A hand wanders in between your thighs, another coming to squeeze your barely-covered ass. You can’t focus on much, just his hands roaming everywhere and his hard dick pressing against your core. He shoves your hips downward again, his cock hard and perfectly against your pussy.

“You feel that?” He asks; it leaves him in one low breath.  

“Yeah,” you say, whimpering. “I want it.”

He grinds up against you again, his thumb teasing the hem of your shorts. Closer to where you want it. “Don’t think you could even take it, baby.”

“I hate you,” you say. “You know I can.”

He laughs. “We’ll see, yeah?” You find a rhythm of grinding down against his cock, nestled right against your ass. He’s everywhere and you can’t handle it anymore, finding yourself craving him more and more.

You moan against his neck—and then come to your senses. “No.”

He smirks when you pull away. “Tempted, were you?”

“Not…” You pause. You’re sweaty, flushed all over, and your panties are sticking to you from how wet you’ve grown. “Not very.”

—

Abu Dhabi is a son of a bitch.

It comes with meetings, meetings, debriefs, calls, meetings. Everything is riding on the night’s race, the flurry of social media a welcome source of anxiety for him as he watches the hours whiz by. You’d missed seeing him, understood he was busy; you send a selfie to compensate and it gets him calm enough to last the pre-race buzz.

Time speeds by with lunch, coaching, drills, talks with Carlos and Mattia and even Max, who displays support as strongly as competitiveness. Before he even realizes it, he blinks and he’s in his suit, adjusting his balaclava, inhaling, exhaling. Everything is just the way he likes—needs—it to be.

He drives himself to P2 behind Max, eyes shut.

All else seeps into him, natural method, natural routine. He flexes his thumbs. Through the team radio his engineer goes good luck, and Charles’ practice bleeds into his subconscious. The air is heavy, with tension and excitement, the division of blue and red. Everyone’s eager to see who claims the title. 

The lights go off and everything is left to skill, blurring into noise and turns and expletives yelled into the team radio. He can’t even feel himself think, turning with dexterity and overtaking with the kind of vengeance he hasn’t let out in a while. 

For all his trying, Max keeps up just the same, keeping a neck and neck level for the relative entirety of the race. They’re milking out the last few laps together, and Charles feels every fibre of his being work toward this, just this, nothing but this right now. Nothing but the finish line.

You got this, Charles, says the engineer, voice heightening. Maiden world championship.

He nods to himself, trusts his instincts and when he catches sight of the finish line, he thinks: he’s the best driver on the grid.

So he revs faster, and the rest descends into—

Absolute fucking chaos.

—

He’s smiling when he approaches the reporter, who’s already holding the mic with wonder. He asks for a message in Italian, then reminds him—and the crowd—that, in case he forgot, he’s world champion. Charles thinks he genuinely can’t ever.

“What are you doing to celebrate?” He asks then, smiling.

Sweaty, with damp hair and shiny skin, he smirks and leans closer. “Someone, I hope.”

—

“Hey there, champ.”

You’re already leaning against his hotel room door when he gets there, after the chore of wrestling himself free from the rest of the team pressuring him to get drinks. Carlos helps out, babbles something or other about Charles being “busy with something else”—which isn't wrong, not at all. He offers a smooth wink, bending down to kiss you.

Your mouths meet, softly first then increasingly messy as he pins you against the door. You push away, breathing heavy. “I don’t know what you’re into, but I don't want the top floor of this hotel seeing us fucking.”

“I wasn’t into that, but now that you brought it up…” You swat his arm and he laughs, unlocking the door and pulling you inside. You’re clinging onto him—his arms, his chest, anything, kissing up his neck and jaw. He groans at how needy you are. All for him, he thinks. Probably soaked through your panties and it’s all because of him.

“C’mon, pretty girl,” he says gently, voice low as he leads you to the bed. He catches sight of your shirt and a brow raises. “Did you buy that?”

“Hmm?” You look down, following his gaze and blinking. The shirt you’re wearing is loose, hanging off your shoulders and hastily tucked into your miniskirt so it looks like you actually have trousers on. “Oh. No, this is yours.”

“Mine.” He smiles a little. “You look so good in it, princess.” His hands mindlessly grope at you, hungry, sneaking underneath your skirt to feel at the lace there. 

In retaliation, you lean forward, unbutton his jeans and tug at it.

“You left it at one of my”—you gasp, feeling his finger sneak its way beneath your panties—“my hotel rooms.”

“Pretty girl, pretty shirt, pretty lace, yeah?” He tugs, lets the garter of the skirt loosen and fall off your hips on its own. “Red.”

“You take too long,” you groan.

“You’re just eager,” he laughs, thumbing at your clothed cunt.

You’re so wet, evident even in the lazy circles he rubs over your entrance. You’re aching, desperate, begging almost. So he gives you what you want, maneuvers you onto his lap and pushes your (his) shirt up to stuff your mouth with it.

It won’t work for long, but it’s enough. He pushes your panties to the side and pulls his hard dick out. You’re sitting against it now, leaking slick onto it, at his mercy, branding his name and his number across your back. It’s hot. 

He stares at the way you rock softly against him, hungry eyes meeting yours. “You’re so pretty, baby. Ruined.”

“Fuck me already,” you say, voice throaty, innocent.

“Can you take it?” He asks, teasing you, slapping his dick against your clit softly. You whine.

“Please,” you insist. “I want it. Make it fit.”

He’s a massive tease with it, his breath fanning against your skin, hands sticky on where they’ve hiked your shirt up. He lowers you, slower, against the tip of his dick and he watches your eyes flutter when you sink onto it. After ages of waiting. Your grip’s like iron on his shoulders, moans leaving you in quiet bursts of pleasure. 

You’re far away, dumb from the feeling, you barely register the way he shoves the shirt back into your mouth to keep you quiet. “So fucking tight, yeah?”

“Yeah,” you say. It’s muffled, barely intelligible. “For you.”

You’re only able to take it because you’re so wet, so turned on, face and brain filled with nothing but pleasure. He can’t take it.

“Mmmfh,” you say, muffled by the bite of cotton in your mouth. You’re sweaty, flushed, overstimulated—you don’t know where to focus. On his lips against your jaw, his hand on your neck, the way your pussy swallows his aching dick. “It’s so big, I—”

“You okay?” He asks, breathily. Smiling. He’s in control, but still he sounds whiny—almost, if not as desperate as you. “You’ll take it all for me, won’t you?” 

“Oh god,” is all you muster, letting him stretch you out even more, gushing all over his cock. “I, I—”

He moans, his grip tight against your waist, watching his dick bury itself in you. “You’re getting me so full,” you whine. “So deep, I feel it—” you taper off into a moan again when he presses hs thumb to your clit, distracting you from the stretch as he finally, finally bottoms out.

“Good?”

You nod. So good, give me more.

You grind against him, let the shirt fall out of your mouth. “You’re getting my dick so wet,” he comments, breathless. “So pretty for me, too.”

Growing antsy, he attempts to move, but you whine. Your turn to tease, you think, after he was a dick to you just now. “Not yet,” you say, lip caught between your teeth. His hands are tight around your waist. Desperate.

You squeeze around him, watch his brows knit together, a grunt leave him in a frustrated exhale. “You wanna fuck me?” You tease against his neck, blinking innocently.

“Yes,” he replies, not missing a beat. You pout, like you’re empathizing with the problem you’re causing; you grind slowly against him and he lets out a guttural fuuuuck. He’s so big, so hard—you can feel every inch of him inside you.

“Tell me again, Charles,” you say with a giggle. You’re so hot like this, face flushed and timid, hips moving slowly. He could cum just from the way you bite your lip, the way a whimper slips out of you when he hits the right spot.

“—Yeah,” he says, sweetly. “I want to—please, let me fuck you. C’mon, baby, can I?”

“Aww,” you tease. 

“Can I?” He asks again, voice deep and thin with the need to fuck you, thrust up into you and make you the dumb one. His face is flushed and desperate. “Can I move, baby? Let me, please.”

You’re not stupid. You know—if his flushed, pleading face and big green puppy eyes are anything to go by—that he’s going crazy, growing antsy. But you’re not complaining.

“Hmm,” you say, feigning genuine thought. “I don’t know, Charles. Feels good just like this. And you want to make me feel good, yeah?”

“Yeah,” he says.

“Yeah.” You repeat, staring into his dark eyes. He’s frustrated, desperate, flushed all over and sweaty. His fingers dig into your hips. “I’ll make you feel really good, baby, if you let me.”

“Go ahead,” you say softly, “fuck me, please.” And he’s thrusting upwards to meet you halfway. It’s knocking you out, almost, the pleasure of it, the dizzy onslaught of euphoria. He’s stretching you out so well, whining softly into your neck and yeah, you two have waited far too long to have this. You 

“Fuck,” he grunts, lids squeezed shut and head rolled onto your shoulder. “Go on, baby, ride it, make me cum.” He cups your jaw, reaches his thumb into your mouth. It’s too much, all of it. He makes you suck on it while thrusting up, dizzying you with his cock.

He grabs handfuls of your ass, teases his thumb at your tighter asshole just to watch your eyes flutter, feel your cunt grow wetter. “I’ll fuck you even fuller next time,” he says; the implication gets you hot.

You bounce harder, chasing release as his thumb teases over your ass, the tip of it just thrusting in enough to elicit strings of moans out of you. “Come on, ride me,” he goads. “So good for me.”

“Fuck,” you pant, “cum in me, please.”

You cum first, writhing around him and riding your orgasm out in lazy grinds over his hard cock. You want to see him cum, see his eyebrows knit and his mouth release pretty whines, feel him claim you inside, hands hot and heavy on your ass. He does, with a guttural fuuuuck, shoving his dick up in you to the base and spurting all his cum in you.

He thrusts, watches his cum leak out of you, fucks it back in, in a vicious cycle. You shiver, blinking coquettishly and watching along—and then you’re both crumpling over each other on the bed behind you. You pant heavily against his chest.

“Hey.” He muses out loud, drumming against your skin.

“Yeah?”

“I have thirty-six condoms we need to go through. Wanna go on a date?”

[satoruhour]

a/n: uururgghghh im starting to struggle to write i swear the next one will be a fluff one. pt.2 to this

warnings: long piece, sugar daddy!au, discussions of kinks including daddy kink, filming, cockwarming, creampies / breeding kink, public sex, exhibitionism, oral (f and m receiving), phone sex, fingering, cumshots, praise, somnophilia, handjobs, size kink, lingerie, let me know if i missed anything, n*sfw under the cut

✶ NANAMI

nanami is an interesting sugar daddy. he thinks it’s bc the opportunity came so randomly that he didn’t know what to do, so he’s new to this as you’re new to him, not expecting the man to show up when you had sent a drunk email to a craigslist listing

it was amusing seeing your email, but he could tell there was at least a bit of need for some monetary assistance when u sent it in because yes, you were drunk but also the type of honest drunk that reminded him of a certain friend… you literally spelt it all out for nanami in the email

and you explicitly remember sinking into your hands when you listened to your friend to go ahead with the meeting and nanami’s small amused smile, knowing way more things about you on your first meeting just from the message

you’re nanami’s first sugar baby, so tbh he doesnt know what to expect, but if he were to actually choose, he wouldnt want a sugar baby, like geto, who is too used to being indulged and spoiled. he needs gratitude or a thank you when he buys you things and he’s okay if youre picky, just not too bc then it’s like impossible to please you

he reluctantly asks gojo about it later on and he is so annoying while explaining to nanami about sugar babies and stuff, but gojo made some pretty good points, shoving a picture of his own sugar baby into nanami’s face with a laugh and then nanami immediately leaves LMFAO

i’d say nanami is pretty lenient though, just strict about what you spend money on sometimes. like if you’re buying a 2024 diary for you to journal, he’s just going to stare at you because he KNOWS you will not keep that journal up lol (sorry to the those who like to journal ahhdhfner)

or like buying those weird expensive snacks with new, experimental flavours only for it to taste like shit and nanami has to gulp down two glasses of water after eating a bbq flavoured chocolate bar

ok im aware this would work even if he wasn’t ur sugar daddy but just pretend

nanami learns the ins and outs for caring about a sugar baby pretty fast, wiring you an allowance everyday and bringing you to events occasionally, but more importantly figuring out your boundaries and how this relationship would go about

it started off purely transactional at first, but then he starts to imagine meeting up more with you, taking you places. it happens against his will for him bc he’s seen these types of relationships fall apart, and he hates opening up to ppl in the first place. but then one day you’re telling him youre meeting with someone from university and he gets so annoyed the next time you meet up

turns out you were hoping he’d do something about it, and he did

like gojo, he wants to be a good boyfriend as he is being your sugar daddy

although he’s very stoic, you know he cares for you when he does small things like buying you the right kinds of pads, paying silently for the dinner when he goes to the “toilet”, finding jobs with you because he doesnt mind if you want to earn ur own money, occasionally buying you little things he finds in high-end stores that are not clothes that reminds him of you.

he doesn’t mind the minor dent in his account after treating you, bc he knows you’re content with already needing money for university. the extra gifts are just a bonus and it warms your heart when he does all these small things

gives you money like semi-often!! he knows you dont spend it impulsively so he spreads out the times he gives you your allowance 

being his sugar baby is sooo classy like you have gotten so many tight black dresses for events that sometimes you cant find things to wear to the grocery store

goes ALL out for anniversaries always, buying you matching necklaces where he takes the other half, bouquets of flowers, that pair of earrings you were looking at the storefront

oh yea he’s always buying you bouquets, you have no idea where to put them

he’s better with larger, wearable gifts as opposed to gojo’s type of small trinket gift giving, but just like gojo he also loves getting you an initial necklace, but just for the sole purpose of showing that you belong to him. it’s cute, he finds himself staring at the N.K. on your neck every time you meet up 

nanami loves his suits, but he is TERRIBLE at dressing out of them. mismatched patterns, ugly ass shoes, please save him

he lets you drag him to buy some clothes for him but whatever he swears he just looks like a grandpa. maybe it’s bc of his light coloured hair

very good at giving pointers for your style tho, so he smiles when he sees you pick a dress bc he said so, a hand dipping down to your ass to squeeze briefly

loves when you visit him in the office whenever you have no classes for the day, a cute sundress on as you bring his lunch like a cute lil wife.

he values privacy a lot and doesnt like to open up at times, so it takes a while for him to properly let you in in his insecurities and doubts. it happens at first when you realise nanami doesnt call you the various pet names he does when around ppl he knows and you bring it up and it escalated into a whole argument

you were just so close to leaving to give him his space but then he starts slowly about having people leave him before and he doesnt want to mess this shit up again. he feels you deserve better, but you told him he is better

with that, u were able to deepen ur bond, but also it allowed nanami to allow a person in his life again, letting your things take over his bathroom space and living room

the first time he considers buying a ring is when you hang off his arm and interact kindly with his clients and fellow CEOs, ignoring the strange pull of his heart. it’s like you understand the importance of

these events, and even though through knowing you and how you didnt exactly favour crowded places, you still put yourself through it

you have to catch your breath later in the bathroom and nanami’s outside, worried as hell and you tell him youre fine, but he’s not having it so u roll your eyes and exit the bathroom, shocked to see his usually calm face turned into an expression of anxiety

he says that you both will leave immediately and you protest but all he does is shake his head and drive you back. needless to say you had so much more fun watching stupid romcoms and cuddling until youre waking up in the morning to something poking you in the back and there’s this adorable flush that overcomes nanami’s cheeks lol

n*sfw hc’s below

doesnt like to jerk off normally. if he does it’s usually morning wood or after seeing a beautiful woman but he just. doesnt get those desires and the need for release. that doesnt mean hes not good at sex or whatever. hes had his days during uni and stuff, but ever since he’s started work it’s been so busy he really has no time whatsoever

sex life with nanami is sweet yet unpredictable. youve always started out slow and sensual mainly because he doesnt want to hurt you or go too roughly but one day youre bringing up how to make ur sex life more exciting and he went “i couldve done this the whole time?”

you had the best night of your life that night jus sayin!!!!

we have established this thru the fandom but nanami is a pleasure dom when it comes to you, not quite like geto who likes watching you do the work. nanami has to give you the pleasure himself

he’s eaten you out more times than youve fucked and he’s really done it everywhere. he has done it under the table when youre on a call for your class. he’s done it at event bathrooms, he’s done it at night in the park. 

NOW. nanami is not big on public sex but then he sees you bend over during your picnic to catch the plastic bag and the wind blew up ur skirt and he saw ur cute little pussy under …. he couldnt resist it

likes the the possibility of getting caught, and it’s obvious you might because you r soooo wet every time he flicks at your clit

he only does it if he gets to eat you out, and if hes really needy, he’ll grant you a quickie but other than that he can hold himself back - plus you deserve better than to be bent over a bathroom sink

also loves breeding you, unprotected sex all da way. likes the way it seeps out of you and your shivers when you feel him fill you up. would get a vasectomy for you considering how much he looooves to cum deep in you

regarding the kinks you may have brought up to him it’s just hoping he’d be rougher, maybe even try some degradation, you even discussed he could use you when youre sleeping if he wanted to. other things include phone sex and the use of toys, but you mentioned that as long as you were both comfy there could always be a fun time

and bro loved it. u realise he’s only ever focused on praise on most days but when he’s stressed from work he always takes it out on you and you fuckin love it lol.

youve done it over the phone a few times but he thinks he prefers to do a video call better, but the first time he wanted to he didnt know how to switch the call from an audio to a video one and you had already came lmaoooo

you were giggling once nanami grumbled over the receiver, but you helped him easily just by talking bout how youd ride him or how youd suck his cock

10/10 that experience and being with you made him be more open to blowjobs more often, not that he didnt before! but hes always been putting you first that hes never thought much abt his own pleasure <3

warning for drabble: consensual somnophilia, no foreplay, mating press, nanami is a little rough, brief fingering and cunnilingus, clit stimulation, unprotected sex, creampie / breeding kink

nanami comes home to your sleeping figure, calm and even breaths leaving your person with a small smile on your face and all he can do is coo, running a hand up your thigh before preparing to carry you, not expecting that when you open your legs, he sees the centre of your pants harbouring a darker, wet spot, pussy lips pulled taunt from how tight your pants were.

and the man immediately chokes back a moan, remembering the conversation after he had used you to your limit on the kitchen counter, scratching on the smooth marble surface while your face was smushed up against the flat surface. with a little grin, you wished he let out his frustrations on you more, even when you were sleeping — and what better time now that his head was close to popping a vein with how incompetent his workers were?

a moan distracts nanami’s thoughts, and among the unintelligible noises you make, he can figure out how you’re probably dreaming, cock hardening once he hears that you w’nna be filled. that is enough reason for him to unbuckle his pants with a relieved sigh, the cold air on his length making him hiss as he peels his underwear off him, length hitting his torso from how hard he was.

“you don’t know what you do t’me, baby,” nanami mumbles, pumping his cock with slow strokes before swiping your pants to the side, lightheaded from just how wet you seem to be. he drags his cock along your folds, collecting your slick on his leaking tip that mixes with the pre-cum and he groans at how you seem to drip more just from that gesture, inching his fat cock into your pliant cunt without much trouble.

you’re so tight, sucking him in the moment he’s sheathed in you until he bottoms out and you’re whining louder now, still bordering on the line of consciousness and unconsciousness. you’re clenching around him so hard that he struggles to move, until he’s feeling you grasp his arm with fatigue in your eyes.

“use me, kento—” nanami grunts at those words, pulling out just to slam back into you and the slutty moan that leaves you cuts through your slumber because nanami’s deeper than he’s ever been in you. your eyes crack open at your boyfriend who’s currently fucking into you, hips moving at a speed faster usual and you cry out when his tip kisses your cervix just barely. 

“feel so fuckin’ good, just let me use you like a cocksleeve, alright?” nanami groans out, taking your legs and pressing them to your chest and the change in position makes you whine, hitting your spots so well now that you’re in a mating press. from here nanami is hypnotised with the way your juices collect on his length, the squelching noises of your sopping cunt only fuelling him on. “who’s making you feel this good, baby?”

there’s tears that linger at your waterline, struggling to even get out a coherent sentence when you’re babbling incomplete sentences and nanami smiles at the drool leaving the corners of your mouth. “you— you a-are— oh my god!”

“rub your clit for me, doll,” nanami whispers out, already feeling his orgasm approaching from how snug you were around him, and the feeling of your fingers massaging languid circles into your clit makes him grunt, and soon after that nanami cums with a loud moan, so vulnerable in that moment that his deep voice goes up a pitch as he releases in you, hot cum spilling into your womb.

you mewl from the feeling but you’re left empty when he removes his cock and dips down to latch his mouth onto your clit, shoving his fingers into your gaping hole to keep you filled. nanami sucks on your bundle of nerves until you cum with a cry of his name, toes curling on his shoulder as your slick drips down his hand. “messy, messy baby,” nanami grins, popping his fingers into his mouth before he spreads your pussy, seeing the mixture of your cum and his leak out, “let’s get you cleaned up, hm?”

✶ TOJI

toji is an all rounded sugar daddy!!! boyfriend.. not so much he is a man who values work and does it well but he gets engrossed in it too much

preferences for a sugar baby vary bc theres a lot of factors involved. it’s not just one thing that he feels will dictate if he likes you as a sugar baby or not but the one important thing he doesnt like is when you dont pull your weight? if that makes sense

like not knowing what you want in life is perfectly fine but if youre just sitting on your ass and expecting money to come in it’s irksome to him, especially when hes worked his ass off to get to where he is today

he also likes it if you have a smart, snarky mouth. it amuses him seeing you flip the finger at him or tell some worker in his company off for commenting on your skimpy outfit

you two met in university. when he was younger he used to work as a professor, but now bc hes the CEO of a big company, he’s only able to handle adjunct jobs

basically he helped you out of a shitty house and stress from not having enough money, that causes you not to do your best in classes and he’s so glad he took a chance on you because he’s never seen you so bright before in class. but he couldnt stay much after taking over a CEO position, so he left in the middle of your second year

pleasantly surprised when he gets an email one day thanking him for the stuff he did for you, offers u a job at his company and from then on he says how he’d like to take care of you despite you finishing school

it also starts out as transactional but one day youre asking to meet in his office to ask why youre getting special treatment and youre telling him it’s not necessary when youre working for him now. “nonsense. i want to take care of you.”

his feelings slipped on a late night when he was working overtime and you stayed up too in order to see toji. you wouldnt admit to yourself but you liked him too. a little more than your usual crush bc ohhh lord have you seen his physique

and he comes out to see you still working and comes to annoy you and just gives you a fat stack of money out of nowhere??? hes bad with words ok

he says i mean it and waits for you to make the first move, but you dont and hes leaning forward to give you a soft kiss. ppl were confused as to why the lights of an office were still on at 3am while you were making out needily on his desk and he pulls insane orgasm after orgasm from you that day

hes a doting man, softened by the years of ageing but he works too much. it’s all he ever knows when you’re on his office couch begging him to go home.

will usually buy in lunch bc hes lazy to get it but sometimes youll cook and bring it to him too.

loves to treat you randomly, but theyre always gifts that you’re confused about bc he hasnt bought a gift for a woman in years so the first time he gifts you an air fryer (not sure why i have an obsession w/ air fryers lately) youre like ???? wtf am i supposed to do with this

and he tells you it’s u have easy access to lunch or dinner without leaving your dorms and youre like “honey i graduated already???” and he’s like oh. oh yea

poor guy did this to himself bc hes so deep in work so he doesnt see you often. he probsbly got mixed up with the days where he would meet you in between meetings and he just was there to accompany you on ur study sesh. he liked watching you study, and it would take a while for him to admit he’s actually liked you way before he offered you a job

toji gets better with giving gifts i swear. and he does it, he lovesss to order things and make the delivery man walk up to your desk with a dior box full of clothing

but sometimes he wishes he could do something more meaningful. he likes to give you SIMPLE handmade gifts. sometimes he gets so frustrated bc his fingers r so big so theyre usually easy to complete things. they’re not like of milestones or memories or photos though, more of silly things like paper rings or a paper fortune teller.

writes. a lot, more than geto. he writes more than makes gifts, and his handwriting is so messy sometimes you dont know what hes saying, but he finds that words on paper is much easier for him than voicing it out (this makes me want to write this me thinks)

so you spend a whole afternoon trying to make out what he’s saying like a detective and when sleep catches up to you he can only smile at your deciphering questions like u were trying to solve a cipher and writes you almost got this line right lolol

looks really good in suits but needs to go shopping often bc sometimes he works out too hard and his shoulders grow again at this point he should continually donate his blazers to thrift stores

sometimes he gives them to you as a jacket of some sort and he tries not to twitch from how small u look in them. the attraction goes both ways, and he wants to cuddle you up and also fuck you silly in it

always wearing that tight shirt of his that never rlly fits him. kinda mediocre and repetitive fit — he’s not exactly interested in fashion

loves to treat you to things. loves to spoil you and see you wearing the things he bought for you, but theyre more casual clothes that he spoils you with. man likes one (1) dress and he’s hoping you wear that dress of the rest of your life lol

toji buys you lingerie just to rip it. i swear :/ youre like that was the last one on the rack!!!! and hes just “ill just commission the designer to make another” like you can do that

and he says im actually not sure. oh speaking of commissions he loves to pay for custom pieces or clothing for you. he knows what he wants for you, and he backs off if you dont like it but seeing something he envisioned on your beautiful body — he just loves it

i said at the start that toji’s not that much of a boyfriend but he tries a lot. you can see he’s trying his best to make time for you in between work but it just. doesnt happen unfortunately. he works on the weekends too so sometimes your dates are compromised

youve thought before if it were to return to it being a platonic arrangement but it hurts your heart to think of that after everything youve been through. but this has been a recurring thing that’s been happening, brought up frequently in arguments as well

it was when he had a business trip on the week of your anniversary that the nail finally hit and youre bringing it up again and he knew he couldnt escape it this time bc you were close to crying when usually you dont. does this shit mean nothing to you? did you offer to pay everything for me just to throw me to the side like you always do?

the moment you see he has nothing to say bc he knows it’s true, youre leaving to get some air and it’s the first time he really understands that he wants to keep you for life that he’s making arrangements to give everyone a raise so theyd work better. and then hes taking time off work for a week

he’s still waiting worriedly for you late at night and your friend just gives toji an unimpressed look and gives you to him, breath laced with alcohol and obvious tear stains on your cheeks and he wants to die bc he was the cause of that

he feels so guilty but for now he kisses your forehead and gets you into a clean set of clothes before laying beside you to hug you close to him. in the morning youre hungover and feel like shit and youre letting toji pat your back and giving you a warm cup of water until you’re going arent you supposed to be at work????? and your boyfriend sighs and brings you into his lap, apologising into your neck as he hugs you

toji admits he hasnt been the best and is willing to do whatever it takes for you to be convinced again and you just stay like that, exchanging slow kisses and a warm embrace, unaware that there’s already an idea of putting a ring on you in toji’s mind

n*sfw hc’s below

toji loves your pussy !!!! ohh my god after that whole situation youve had more opportunities now. he had eaten you out before in his office, fucked you there but was always threatened by time. not that he cared but hes had enough of clients backing out on him so you suggested he go into meetings earlier

it came to bite you back in the ass cause you end up being horny for him multiple times and youve only able to bribe him out of meetings successfully like three times

loves any part of your body on his cock. making out? give him a handjob. eating dinner? play footsies with him and use ur feet to massage his dick. in a meeting? BLOW HIM !!!!!

another one who loves to cum on your face, but sometimes he likes to cum on your chest and tits and when you grab his cock to smother the cum on you >>>>>

he was surprised the first time you crawled under his table a minute before his meeting started and he already knew what you had in mind. he was clearly excited, getting hard almost instantly and had to mask the redness on his face with a hand

toji coughs when you first unbuckle his pants and he’s listening in to a coworker pitch a business idea, trying to keep his composure when your mouth first encloses around his tip. and u have the gall to giggle omg? he cums so hard that time he realises hes the only one left in the zoom meeting after and the other made sure to teach you a lesson after, fucking you until everything on his desk ended up on the floor. he’d have to call the company contractor to cover up the scratch marks on the floor ehehe

obsessed with how much bigger he is compared to you, always towering over your person and he has to resist manhandling you when you place an innocent hand on his forearm and ask him a question

LOVES to send you dick pics. and his are the ones where he actually knows how to pose, like palming his bulge in sweatpants when hes home and youre not

takes a pic of his actual dick under the table at work and alludes to the time you gave him a bj 

his pictures are actually SO hot that youre immediately calling him up just to talk to him

you always end up getting off yourself too though, the raspy voice comin from your phone enough to make you cum

before, exchanging lewd messages and pics were a norm but now if he needs you he’s asking his driver to drive you back to his house STAT. bro needs to be in you asap

he once left an event where he was supposed to be presented with some award just bc you sent a very lovely pic of you in the dark green lingerie you bought on his black card

he fucked you so well that night you knocked out immediately and he had to clean you up, all lovestruck and soft

leans into the ‘daddy’ thing pretty okay, but hes okay if you dont use it either

agrees to be in suggestive tiktoks where they show off their man only to do something totally inappropriate so now that vid is kept in your priv collection bc it ended up being extended and became a vid of you holding your front camera up to your face with tongue lolled out and profanities leaving your mouth

he takes the phone later from you to film how his cock moves in and out of you yyuuuummm he loves it

like gojo, loves to video you because sometimes he goes on long business trips and he needs to have something to jerk off to

his favourite is when you’re on your back and he’s filming your pussy taking his fat cock, folds spreading so nicely while his cum from earlier forms a white ring around the base of his cock oh god he watches that over and over

also loves cumming in you but more of the thought of marking you compared to knocking you up

cockwarming aahhahsddj it’s one of his other favourite things to do, hiking your skirt and tears your pantyhose, sinking you down on his aching length and he just loves the wrap of your pussy around him. trust me he’s trying not to thrust up into you but youre breaking down easily and he hisses every time you shift just a little

warnings for drabble: cockwarming, daddy kink, semi-public sex (toji’s on a call and the person on the line hears), riding, clit stimulation, calls you ‘slut’, unprotected sex, creampie / breeding kink

“c’mon, tojiii, just for a while?” you pout, tugging on his arm with big doe eyes, smiling to yourself when he just sighs and mutters out a fine.

toji can’t help but smile either way, receiving the peck on your cheek with heated cheeks, but now he smiles wholeheartedly, his hard cock buried in you while you struggle not to move. there’s wireless buds in his ears, stuck in the middle of a meeting while your face is hidden in his neck, soft pants leaving your mouth.

you’re thankful the camera isn’t on at least, but you’re still at risk with the small sounds you make, trying to focus on anything but the pulsing large cock in you. you already regret asking for this when you knew he had a meeting coming up with the thought of making him crave for you. instead it happens the other way around, you begging him to move with your hips while he calmly puts his hands on them, rubbing circles into your back like it helped.

but you don’t care, not when you’re filled to the brim like this and you can’t move, so slowly you start to roll your hips, grinding onto his pelvis and you can hear toji exhale shakily, voice still firm as he agrees ro the budget the client proposed. his hand holds the back of your neck and pulls you from the embrace, setting his eyes on you with a warning but you only can shrug, lifting your hips before dropping down on his cock.

“angel…” he mutes the microphone, the man droning on about numbers and profits making his head spin when his pretty girl was deliberately ignoring his warnings, but he couldn’t blame you with how your hot, tight pussy felt around him. toji assumed his plea of that simple name he liked to call you was enough, but when he unmutes his mic, you’re pulling one side of his earbuds off, mouth close to his ears.

“please, daddy…” you mumble, still bouncing on his thick cock. by now you’ve been cockwarming him for an hour, cunt slick with juices that it drips down his balls and onto the office chair, the movement of your hips only highlighting the lewd, sopping sounds of your pussy. there’s no doubt the other man hears what’s going on but you only press on, the chair creaking below the both of you as you ride him. toji’s trying so hard not to groan himself, throat tight and uncomfortable.

“let him hear,” you whimper out, a hand reaching down to rub your clit and toji grunts at the thought of it, of you knowing you belong to him, “wan’ him to know how good my daddy makes me f-feel, mmf—”

and so he listens to you once you say that, wrapping both arms tightly around you before his hips also meet yours, your juices spurting and spilling all over from how wet you were. your moans get louder in his office while he bullies his thick cock into you, tip kissing your spots so deliciously that you can only manage one word pleas. you sink easily into him after a while before he takes the lead, fucking up into you with the sounds of his balls hitting the fat of your ass.

“my pussy’s so warm and tight. ya likin’ this huh? you little slut,” toji grins, loving how he can feel your nipples through your work attire and the stretch of your pussy on him and the shock on the other’s face. if anything, you both knew how much he wished the camera was on on toji’s side.

“y—yeah, love it s’much! gonna cum, toji—”

toji only hums, capturing your lips in a kiss and effectively swallowing your whimpers as he thrusts deeper into you, “pretty girl’s gonna cum?”

“y-yeah daddy…” he feels you nod and mumble, hands massaging your sides before he feels your pussy clench around him and you cum with trembling thighs and a lax jaw. the way you look and feel also has toji grunting out with stuttering hips and he shoots his load deep in you, sending you into a blissful, dazed state as he spills his white liquid deep down your cunt.

with a shiver, you’re catching your breath before feeling his cum spill out of you, blobs of white pooling at the hilt as you swipe a finger at it to pop it in your mouth, exchanging a grin with toji before he starts a pace again, call long forgotten and a transfer at the tip of his fingers to keep his loyal client’s mouth shut.

ty for the request muaahahahah @moonjella

[pascals-doll]

DISPO

ellie williams x reader

『••✎••』 finally, time for date night. ellie takes you out to the busy city for a beautiful dinner that turns unraveling in many different ways. | WC: 9.0K

ೀ THIS IS A SERIES | FOR ALL PARTS GO HERE

SERIES MASTERLIST

ೀ PSA I LEFT YALL ON A CLIFFHANGER SORRY 👀 PLS DONT HATE ME

ೀ HEAVY FORESHADOWING ID SAY 😭 dispo is such a masterpiece of a song like can i eat the song ?

ೀ description: MODERN AU! CONVERSATIONS ABOUT HARD TOPICS (immigration, family death, bonding over trauma), HOMOPHOBIA AT THE END! IF THIS TRIGGERS U I ADVISE U NOT TO READ!TOXIC BEHAVIOR FROM EX SUGGESTIVE CONTENT ONLY! latina!reader, heavy description of reader having bronze/tawny skintone, mentions of smoking weed, mentions of reader’s insecurities, reader speaks spanish!, bff!dina, latino parents chismiando, brief background on toxic relationship, FLUFF FLUFF FLUFF, immense flirting, heavy makeout sesh, groping, no use of y/n (use of mama, bonbóm)

CHAPTER THREE

ellie made her way back to the repair lot like she had just won the lottery.

all she did was throw the plastic store-bag onto Joel’s work desk the second she got back into the garage, completely ignoring Joel.

she immediately whipped out her phone to open your contact that she had been dying to open ages ago.

“earth to ellie williams-miller!” joel semi-shouts in an attenpt tone get her attention.

ellie was too busy typing her fingers away.

gatúbela 💋

▃▃▃▃▃▃▃ ▃▃▃▃▃▃▃

u will be seeing me there as a customer alot more ⤶ 6:00 PM

✉️ ᴮᵉᵉᵖ..! one messageˎˊ˗

6:02 PM ⤷ i can get used 2 u as a regular ;)

ellie was cheesing at her phonescreen like a kid with their first phone.

can i call u later tonight? ⤶ 6:04 PM

6:05 PM ⤷ yess ill lyk when i get off work

get home safe ⤶ 6:06 PM

6:07 PM ⤷ ay ay captain 🫡

you both went home that night to enjoy a 3 hour phone call.

you both didn’t get any rest that night.

every morning felt like a blessed morning, especially waking up to a text from miss Ellie Williams-Miller.

you had learned her full name when you exchanged each other’s a few nights ago during your endless phone call with the inamoratà.

she was chivalrous and sweetly coltish.

she captivated you in such a manner, you never thought you could feel so whole before.

she had you smitten and you didn’t even notice.

Dina didn’t miss a single second of every moment. the way she couldn’t tear you away from your phone even during your shared daily binge of ‘Vanderpump Rules’ together.

Dina will never forgot that night you came back to Dina’s apartment from working at the convenience store. you had came through the front door, dropping your purse on the ground before screaming like bloody-murder.

Dina ran out of her room frantically to find her bestfriend capering around before twirling with her hands in the air “okay okay! just needed to get that out ma’system!” you exhale out, stopping in place like you were im the middle of a stage; performing.

you connected your excited eyes with Dina’s “are you on crack?” Dina asks you jokingly.

you chuckled “you won’t believe who just happened to walk up into store!” your question being rhetorical as your face beamed as you throw yourself onto her couch.

“i’m listening!” you spent the entire night, staying up and talking to Dina about how Ellie just managed to run into where you work.

༺ ♱ ༻ ༺ ♱ ༻ ༺ ♱ ༻ ༺ ♱ ༻

all of your mornings for a month now have consisted of dulcet messages from ‘green eyes’. you refer to the contact you gave her.

you would wake up and do your usual morning routine which now had one extra add-on to every part of your routine.

each moment was complimented by a graceful reminder of Ellie as you woke with a ping from your phone; knowing it was her.

she would call you while you made breakfast and ever since, she face-timed you once on accident in the middle of your morning toke; she now calls every 12 pm to smoke with you through face-time.

you both only really had time to talk as you both got busy quickly. especially since you learned that working at Joel’s car-shop is very time-consuming, ellie went on about one day.

Ellie moved to your hometown from Jackson five years ago which completely explained the country accent she carried in her voice.

she emphasized on how Joel got a job opportunity to be able to open up his own shop with his brother that had moved out here with his wife.

she told you about how moving to help him by working at the car-shop taught her a lot of patience. Ellie was very patient and percise about the things she did, it became a habit to do even outside of work.

ellie was probably also one of the greatest listeners you’ve ever met because when she listened, she understood.

she understood you.

even if it was through the phone, depicting her facial expression through a pixelated screen. ellie’s facial expressions never faltered from intentive and enthralled.

she understood the fact that when you told her you lived with your parents still.

how personally, you just couldn’t call all those times she asked as you were dying to answer.

she never pushed for questions out of you, allowing you to give her any information you chose to give her.

she just complimented you almost like it was perfect.

although she approached you with a more somewhat open-book while you reserved yourself a bit more, Ellie didn't mind it at all.

she was patient. very patient.

༺ ♱ ༻ ༺ ♱ ༻ ༺ ♱ ༻ ༺ ♱ ༻

you both had planned to go out together ages ago but it felt like the universe just loved to fuck with you.

the day you were supposed to go on the date with Ellie. you had spent your entire morning on Face-Time with Dina, trying to find out what to wear.

you had told your mom you were going out with a new friend you made last night. of course, latino parents cant help the chisme.

“si si, no, estoy feliz de que ella empiece a sentirse mejor después de ese chico ay,”( yea yea, no, im glad shes starting to feel better after that boy, ay)

“sí, saldrá con un amiga esta noche, está muy emocionada!” (yes, shes going out with a friend tonight, shes really excited!)

why was this bad? well because somehow-someway during all the chismiando between your family, it got to your ex’s family.

this later on resulted to him showing up to your work, trying to find you to talk fifteen minutes after you had just clocked out. you end up getting a call from your tía saying that "he needed to talk to you" which only made your heart anguish.

needless to say, the families were still in-close contact even with the messy break-up. the only reason is because you basically grew up with your bitch-ass ex.

he was your family friend for so many years, but it was so cute and innocent the little crush you had on him for years. you even went to the same schools together; both of your parents wanted you together, in a sense.

it was planned and as you got older, you began to realize.

he was your first everything.

anything you could think of, he was the one to cross it off your list. you can't say you regret it or anything because it was a love that festered for ages between the both of you. you just couldn't compare your relationship with him to much other romantic experiences.

he was all you knew.

while you all the people you knew were hooking up, experiencing different 'situationships'.

you didn't feel left out because it wasn't the 'hooking up and different talking stages'. it was the fact that the times that your ex did leave you; stating he needed a 'break' to do god knows what...

the 'men'.... if you could even call them that by the way they handled themselves. they weren't worthy, not even a moment of your time.

it was tiring and you found your eye-candy would be women, but you were too oblivious to know. you wouldn't realize the lingering stares and double-takes you would do whenever you found a woman attractive without thinking.

that being said, before time came to close of going out on that date with the woman you had growing adoration for because of how panicky you grew.

you hated breaking the news to Ellie, having to tell her family came up although you ended up calling her an hour later till midnight.

you were beyond alarmed now, knowing your ex had tried to reach you.

༺ ♱ ༻ ༺ ♱ ༻ ༺ ♱ ༻ ༺ ♱ ༻

regardless of all the 'bullshit' and Ellie picking up extra hours at the shop, you both finally were going on that date.

a part of you was slightly grateful for the delay, you got to be in her presence more; getting the chance to learn more about her.

you had spent the whole week preparing yourself. you didn't need any help getting ready, you were a pro in that department. you were mentally preparing yourself; preparing yourself to have a good dinner like you've never done that with someone before.

you've been on dates, but you wouldn't even pack your appetizer to go, not even getting a proper entree because you knew you would leave the table and that brainless moron before you even got your first bite in.

if we were to talk about dates with your ex, that is one thing you for sure both didn't do on dates; was talk. you would just sit there in silence enjoying the meal that you didn't have to pay for, that is one thing you will miss.

green eyes 🍀

▃▃▃▃▃▃▃ ▃▃▃▃▃▃▃

goodmorning stinky ⤶ 11:11 AM

✉️ ᴮᵉᵉᵖ..! one messageˎˊ˗

11:11 AM ⤷ foodmorning smelly

⤷ goodmorning** am i ur wish ☺️

corny ahh ⤶ 11:12 AM

but yes u are will u make it come true :3 ⤶

11:13 AM ⤷ u will jus have to find outt wont ya

ouu surprises u rlly tryna butter me up ⤶ 11:13 AM

11:14 AM ⤷ if u probs punched me

⤷ id lowk like it

??? 😭 shut up idiot ⤶ 11:15 AM

when shall i be ready by ma’am ? ⤶

11:15 AM ⤷ its hot when u speak like we in old times

⤷ how long do u need mama ?

ur making me blush oh my oh my ⤶ 11:17 AM

jkjk i get off work today at 2:30 ⤶

just an hour will be good :) is 4:30 okay with u ? ⤶

11:18 AM ⤷ cus of ur sarcasm i give u 15 mins 🤗

⤷ 4:30 is perfect i dont have work today so im all urs

haha hilarious ⤶ 11:19 AM

thank you for the ride :) i rlly appreciate it ⤶

11:20 AM ⤷ shhh

⤷ ofc like a real gentlewoman ‼️✂️

⤷‼️‼️*** THAT WAS NOT ON PURPOSE

⤷ im gonna kms

oh ellie baby u need a new phone or sum ⤶ 11:20 AM

but yes a real gentlewoman indeed ✂️ ⤶

i gtg :( ill ttyl green eyes ⤶

11:21 AM ⤷ ihy but lmk gorgeous

⤷ ill see u soon

💋 ⤶ 11:21 AM

“jesus! back up, you lookin’ mad scary” Dina’s voice rings through the speaker of your phone, bringing your attention back to the Face-Time you were on with her.

you let out a playful scoff as you got up from laying down on your bed "let me guess, Ellie?" Dina chimes in as she sees the way you were cheesing at your phone.

"yeah....." you let out a pleasant sigh like some toddler who finally got the ice cream they spent all day begging for.

"yeah-if you don't take your gay ass to work" Dina giggles out, mocking your tone at first "oh whatever! I'll call you later, pendeja" you giggle out with her before hanging up the phone and getting ready for work.

you swallowed the uneasy gut feeling in your stomach, putting music on before you began to put your hair up. you weren't going to let your paranoia and emotions get the best of you.

༺ ♱ ༻ ༺ ♱ ༻ ༺ ♱ ༻ ༺ ♱ ༻

work was longer than expected, you practically watched the clock tick with anticipation. you couldn't wait to clock out, quite literally run home, and get dolled up.

you don't remember the last time you got so euphoric over a date, the overwhelming excitement and nervousness brining your mental back getting ready for your first date ever; except you felt yourself even more overjoyed than the first.

since you were a kid, you loved dress-up. if it was one thing for certain about yourself, it was what you wanted and how you wanted it. you carried yourself in your appearance, making it your amor.

even in your most weak moments, you will admit that your look never failed to loom out. people were never ever able to tell when you were depressed or angry; masked perfectly by your bold makeup and clothing.

your outstanding clothing making up for your lack of self-assurance, never letting anyone even think for a second that you weren't full of experiences due to your confident personality.

people wouldn't be able to understand you, simply due to the fact that although you haven't lived much to find your inner identity. you knew who you who you were still in some imbalanced messy way. it didn't matter to a person at surface level because of your menacing demeanor, automatically making them nervous under your tigress gaze.

your ex began to hate it at some point as he found your vixen-self threatening to his masculinity. after two years of being together, you noticed how he began to try to control what you wear and how you did your makeup by trying to have a 'say' in what you wore.

when you never let it happen, you picked up on his automatic distance and at some point, even beginning to slut-shame you as way of insulting you.

the only reason you didn't like it was because of how you could pull anyone away from him, taking all his cheating ways away.

this feeling Ellie erupted in your soul, it was better than all your first's.

once you arrived home, walking in through the front door as you quickly greeted your parents before making your way up to your bedroom. you took your phone and sent a message to Ellie, letting her know you were home.

you immediately got to calling Dina as you began to shuffle through all the clothing in your closet. you wanted to wear something valiant but not flashy.

you began to throw out of their hanger's different assortments of bottoms, dresses, and different shirt combinations; soon your floor was covered in different clothing ideas.

"I don't want to wear something that makes her think I'm a hooker" you explain to your best friend through the phone as you showed her the past 10 different outfit options.

"girl, the options weren't even that raunchy! hmm, I say-the cheetah dress!" Dina affirms pleasantly through the phone screen. you pick up the skin-tight tube-slip dress to try it on once more.

it was covered in the cheetah print pattern, it made your body eccentricate as the dress hugged your curves and stopped at perfect mid-thigh length.

the dress brought out all your features perfectly. the print pattern complimented your tawny skin and stopped right above the chest, hugging your torso completely.

it was simple yet a statement piece.

you thought it wasn't too party-like nor too fancy while you checked yourself out in your long mirror "that's the one! pair it with a coat!" Dina cheers as you spin around for her in the camera's view for her approval.

"okay with what shoes!?" you ask you began to look for a coat to match with your dress.

Dina continued to help you put your entire outfit together. she helped you end up choosing your black platform slip mary-janes with a beige jean coat that had furry lining inside of the jacket.

you began to do your signature makeup look, your eyes never without the thick long black wing as your golden highlighter created a halo for your natural illumination from your bronze tone.

you added a muted pink blush to your face to cause the perfect hue on your cheeks before sealing your makeup look all together with your iconic cocoa lipliner, applying your lip combo.

you started looking through all your gold jewels, trying to find decide which jewelry would be perfect for this outfit. you choose these gold earrings that dangled, scattering your fingers with thick gold rings, and your neck being complimented by your golden rosario's and small shining medallions.

by the time you were ready, 4:30 rolled around in no time.

༺ ♱ ༻ ༺ ♱ ༻ ༺ ♱ ༻ ༺ ♱ ༻

you puffed on the joint that you hastily rolled in a way to calm your nerves before Ellie arrived, you were leaning against the bay window inside your living room as you dozed off into the front street of your house through the open window. you began to think about all the possible ways this night; alone with her could go.

just the thought alone could have shivers running up your spine as your stomach was queasy with butterflies. once you finished your joint, you seen a black car pull up to the front of your house, not even two minutes later; your phone rang out a ping.

you quickly checked yourself out once more before retouching any makeup you felt needed. you made your way to your front door, kissing your mom goodbye before walking out.

you felt and heard your heart pound against your chest with each step, you were thankful for that smoke break or else you would've been sweating right now. your body felt hot and flushed; you haven't even seen the woman yet.

༺ ♱ ༻ ༺ ♱ ༻ ༺ ♱ ༻ ༺ ♱ ༻

Ellie smiled at the little notification of your message from only a couple minutes ago before staying keeping an eye on your front-door.

Ellie was trying her hardest to swallow her nerves, she could only reminisce on the all the trouble she went through to even get an outfit that she thought was 'good enough'.

she made a mess of her room before just shoving it all to the side as she began to straighten her hair and throwing it up into a lazy half up-half down.

as Ellie was lost in thought, she peeped from the corner of her eye your silhouette from outside of her tinted car window get closer. Ellie wasted no time in opening her car door, stepping outside.

she left her door open as she made her way over to you.

the second Ellie's eyes fell onto you, it felt like the entire world stopped.

gorgeous wasn't even enough of a word to describe the way you looked.

you looked purely otherworldly, like you had been descended from Cleopatra herself.

Ellie was at a loss of words, your beauty completely striking the words right out her mouth as her steps haltered at the front of the passenger car-door. your prepossessing glamour completely capturing her as her eyes sparkled at you in awe.

but she wasn't the only one who was drooling.

your lip began to tingle in pain as you bit onto it, trying to stop your mouth from falling open as you shamelessly gawked at her. you didn't even notice her checking you out as you were doing the exact same thing.

Ellie was wearing a white crop top that stopped at the lower of her stomach, completely hugging her chest as the muscles of her arms flexed a bit as her hands were tugged away into the pocket of her fitted corduroy dress pants that bagged at the bottom. it was complimented by a black belt with a silver thick buckle, her semi-long crop top flowing above her dress pants perfectly.

she had an assortment of silver rings decorating her long fingers as her tattooed arms had a couple of different bracelets hugging each wrist and her infamous converse.

"oh fuck" you couldn't help but let your thoughts be audible as the light of the sunset now completely dawned on the both of you.

the way the sun sparkled onto her freckles, gleaming her green-hazel eyes while her hair was thrown up into the cutest hairstyle. Ellie was completely mesmeric, craving her completely.

your out-loud thought seemed to snap Ellie out of her own mesmerized daze. she threw you an awkward smile before opening the car-door to the passenger "just for you" Ellie slys out, trying to stop her breath from hitching.

you made her a complete mess under your gaze.

the sentence that fell from her delectable lips chimed through your ears like the melody of a song.

"why thank you" you say sweetly, your smile being slightly shy as you ducked into the passenger seat of her car as Ellie made her way back into the driver's seat.

"soo where are you taking me?"

you question once she was sat in the seat with a smile on your face "there's this fancy place-Joel recommended it t'me, it has a good selection of different cuisines." Ellie explains, her attention completely on you as her eyes can't help but continue to rake throught your body.

your heart fluttered, she really put alot of effort into this evening. it's not like you didn't think that she wasn't going to take you out somewhere nice but you just didn't think she would put so much thought by even going to ask Joel for advice.

you found is so sweet how she thought ahead and methodically by even choosing a place that didn't have a specific selection of food; not wanting to force you to eat anything you didn't like.

you were an observant person just as much as Ellie was, it was one thing that made you guys connect on a different level. you guys couldn't hide from each other as you both felt every emotion that radiated off each other.

she cared, she put everything together carefully.

"if that's not okay! we-we can go anywhere you want!" Ellie grew nervous as you stared at her, scared you weren't going to like her plans "oh! shut up Williams, i love it." you giggle out, reaching a hand over to put a finger in between her lips naturally before removing it but still slightly leaned into the atmosphere of her seat.

"you look-phew-there isn't even a word for how stunning you look" the compliment was sincere as she leaned into you more, closing the space between you two; not even thinking as she just completely soaked you in like her you were her biggest blessing.

she made you fall into putty with the flattery Ellie rushed into you "it's sexy knowing that we both smoked before this" you joke out, trying ease the overwhelming emotion fulfilling your insides as you could smell the mango cigarillo on her from the blunt she smoked earlier.

Ellie chuckles out which is only music to your ears "you look really amazing, els" your tone sheeped out as you continued the close intimacy between the both of you. the nickname fell from your lips like you had been saying it your whole life.

the tension was thick and oozing.

Ellie bit her lip in between her teeth as she couldn't help but give a big smile before looking away from your enchanting eyes.

"you ready for our date?" Ellie boosts like a little kid, it was the first time she had put so much effort into taking care and taking anyone out. she used to mainly go on cafe dates or to the movies because you barely had to talk.

this time was completely different, you were like a diamond in a sea of rocks.

Ellie felt the need to give you the best of her.

"I've never been more ready for anything."

༺ ♱ ༻ ༺ ♱ ༻ ༺ ♱ ༻ ༺ ♱ ༻

you finally pulled up to the restaurant, the valet at front leading you to the reserved parking lot once the valet person handed Ellie her ticket. you insisted on paying for parking, but Ellie didn't even give you a meer second to dig into your black mini purse after making the suggestion.

"its only $20, don't worry about it" was all she said, her hand touching yours reassuringly.

you would never know it, but each extra hour Ellie picked up slaving away at black grease and car parts was going to be worth every penny spent on you; together tonight.

the car ride was beyond delightful as you and Ellie practically shared the same music taste, even putting her onto some old Spanish songs as she admired the way your voice sung each lyric; even trying to say a couple of the lyrics as you encouraged her.

"did you learn English or Spanish first?"

Ellie asked more questions about your ethnic background.

yes, she knew where your parents were from since you told her during one of the many Face-Time calls, but she wanted to know more about your personal experiences with your culture.

you thought it was sweet the blithesome demeanor she had when indulged into you every time you spoke.

you both bounced off each other, your energies working together as the natural flow of your egos meet like magnets, there was no worry about how you both looked to one another, no worries that anything you might say or do is wrong; Ellie didn't make you second-guess your own being as you didn't make Ellie over-analyze everything.

you both brought out the best and drowned out the hardest parts of the both of you.

the restaurant was located inside of a wide outside mall that had an area full of different dining places.

when Ellie parked the car in the open parking lot, she got out of the car and immediately went to open your door like the 'gentlewoman' she was.

she grabbed your hand as you put your two feet out, stepping each one down elegantly onto the outside pavement as her hand helped you up and out of her car before proceeding to shut the door closed for you.

you smoothed out your dress once you stood up as Ellie's hand rested on the small of your back comfortingly, your stomach was doing cartwheels and all types of fucking flips.

you both walked in through the front doors, close together as you are immediately greeted by the hostess.

"Hello there, good evening! do one of you have a reservation with us tonight?" the blonde woman asks as she smiles sweetly between the both of you "Yes, that'd be me. It's under 'Ellie Miller'" she replied.

you smiled at how she shorten her name which she only looked over to return sheepishly "perfect! follow me" the blonde hostess exclaims as she grabbed two menu's and began to lead you to your table.

༺ ♱ ༻ ༺ ♱ ༻ ༺ ♱ ༻ ༺ ♱ ༻

your table was a semi-booth, more tucked to the corner yet still in the semi-center of the extended restaurant walls.

the table was decorated with lit candles and a small-dangly chandelier above the both of you. the restaurant had fake vines all around the shelving's and ceiling. the place had a classical fairy-burrow esque to it.

the lighting was warm and dim, not overpowering the both of you at all as the rest of the restaurant blended into a shadow by the strong illumination from only the lit candles at your table, highlighting the both of you for only each other.

"I absolutely adore this place, thank you for taking me here." you were slightly awe-struck. sure, Cheesecake Factory is alright, but this wasn't just about the location.

it was how she was the one to take you here.

"I'm happy you like it, it looks better than in the pictures" Ellie jokes out as she held the menu in her hand, not even looking at it. you giggle out, playfully smacking the small of her hand.

you both began to scroll through the menu together, going over each thing as Ellie asked for your intel for anything your finger lingered on.

Ellie was also slightly becoming indecisive between the options she had her eyes on. almost naturally, you scoot closer into her, legs completed pushed up against each other, and snaking an arm around Ellie without a thought.

as you were helping her choose the waiter finally arrives.

"Hello ladies, how can i help you-" the waiter stops talking the second you both look up at him.

he was a tall man that had dreads falling down his face, concealing it slightly as you couldn't quite get a good look at his face, his tall frame and elegant work suit only in lighting's view.

you could see by the glint of the candles, the way his expression changed but his eyes weren't peeled onto the both of you. they were trained onto you.

there was this unruly tension that began to form and engulf the atmosphere.

you could feel the way his eyes glared into you, only you. you watched through the shitty lighting how his forehead creased, and his eyebrows snapped together before abruptly clearing his throat.

"So sorry! Good evening are you ready to order?" the tone wasn't the same although he excused himself, there was this dead and forced tone talking to the both of you.

you watched the way his eyes fell onto Ellie, feeling uneasy about the whole thing.

"mhm your excused, i would like the Chicken Tikka-Masala with seasoned rice. then for my girl-" Ellie tone came off as stand-offish, she wasn't oblivious to the actions of the waiter for whatever reason for his actions.

she gave you a soft smile as you began to order your dish of choice.

the waiter didn't say anything, completely noting down your order in silence as your eyed burned into him. there was something about him that itched you. not in a good way at all.

you tried to focus your vision and brain on him while trying not to alarm Ellie, it was like it was on the tip of your tongue.

he seemed familiar, he felt familiar.

your mind couldn't put a pin on it but this subconscious familiarization with him slowly begins to bubble a small anxiety inside you.

just like that, he walks away; not giving a second glance to either of you.

'if i could've only read his nametag' you thought.

"poor waiter was checking you out" Ellie teases causing you slightly giggle but you were too alarmed to give a genuine reaction.

that man was definitely not checking you out.

༺ ♱ ༻ ༺ ♱ ༻ ༺ ♱ ༻ ༺ ♱ ༻

Ellie was quick to make all that anxiety and harrowing thoughts vanish within the blink of your eye.

your meals were brought out to you with no problem by some polite woman, completely forgetting about the man as now all you could think about was the woman you were on this splendid date with.

the conversations were deep as you both died to know more like you were each other's favorite subjects. the both of you were so enthralled between the conversations you shared and the growing sexual tension.

you felt at such ease with her, Ellie could even help you open up about topics that you considered "hard to talk about" for the longest.

it was your very first date with her and you were already each-other's open-books.

you opened up to her more about your family. you told her about how your parents were immigrants and the second you turned 18 and your older sister was 25 and wanted to start her family; they put your childhood home under your name which is why you still lived with them.

you felt safe as you unraveled yourself. she listened to every family story, even the 'bad' ones.

you bonded over your family businesses and passion for one another's hobbies. you learned how she loved to play the guitar besides art, she also knew a lot about naturalism and camping.

you loved hearing her talk about her love for the outdoors, one of her stories being how she took a road trip with Joel once all the way to California for one of her birthday's; just so she could see the ocean.

Ellie opened up about how it was like growing up without ever getting to know her mom due to her passing.

you both didn't feel the need to hide the ugly from each other as you both indulged in it, not a single ounce of judgement or need for questioning.

you both just heard each other as your souls sang together.

you even enjoyed your meal in silence, usually hard topics could create a uneasy or awkward tone for the rest of the night but instead you both thought your meals were even more delightful.

there wasn't an ounce of awkwardness in the silence while you enjoyed your Indvidual meals; or insecurities between the two of you as you both made each other feel imperfectly perfect.

"wanna try some of mine, bombón?" the new little term of endearment fell naturally from your lips which caused the softest pink hue spread over Ellie's cheeks, barely visible.

"I don't know what that means but I love it." Ellie beams as she answers your question with the action of leaning her head closer for the spoonful of your food that you were holding on your utensil.

you giggle out as you feed her the spoonful as you take her in while she was leaned in this close to your face.

as you got closer to finishing your meals, you both reminisced about high school years. Ellie told you about how she picked up basketball which has the fault for the number of wife-beaters she owns. you told her about how you used to play volleyball. you were actually the best on the team because you were one of the only ones who knew how to do a proper carry. you only did volleyball till your senior year where Dina convinced you to join the Dance Team with her.

"oh, I need to know about those dance days!" Ellie cheered out as she gave you a playful smirk "well, where did you think I picked up those little moves from?" you leaned into her ear as you spoke lowly, your tone turning suggestive. frankly, as much as you hate to admit it. you aren't stupid to the fact that just Ellie giving you one look had your arousal, as a matter of fact, dripping.

Ellie was on the exact energetic page as you, the hazel in her eyes darken as her eyes pour into you "ah I see, I wonder what else you can show me" Ellie shamelessly flirted with you.

if both meals were done; Ellie was ready to handle the check and get you all to herself.

"depends baby, whatcha' tryna see?" your tone was laced with pure sexual insinuation as your lips brushed against her ear, causing shivers down her spine. Ellie leaned herself into you more before turning her head to be face-to-face with you; your lips brushing together.

you couldn't hear the way your hearts palpitate together in sync, only hearing each other's own individual hearts boom as you both become insatiable for each other.

"is it okay if I fix myself up in the restroom while you pay? will you meet me there?" your tone was only seductive and teasing as you took your hand to caress her lower thigh.

"go on mama, don't worry" her voice was barely above a whisper against your lips, you smile against them slightly before pecking them softly.

all she could do was watch as you. the way your ass hugged that dress as your tits perked up as you sat up, the way your bronze legs stepped away from her while you made your way to the ladies room.

Ellie eyes that were trained on your body walking away from her was obstructed by the tall waiter from before. this time he was standing closer, and Ellie got to get a better look at him.

"ready for the check?"

"yes, that would be amazing."

Ellie couldn't help but give the man a mean stare at the man as she signed off the check before placing her card into the checkbook.

he left without a word but took a double look, noticing how you werent sitting next to her.

once the check made its way back, Ellie didn't waste any time on making her way to that restroom.

༺ ♱ ༻ ༺ ♱ ༻ ༺ ♱ ༻ ༺ ♱ ༻

while you were in the restroom, you quickly touched up your lip combo; hoping for it only get ruined.

soon enough, Ellie walked through the restaurant bathroom door. you made eye contact with her before walking off into a stall. you shut the stall door behind you, but you didn't lock it.

of course, Ellie follows; this time actually locking the door behind her. she stalked her way closer to you as you were up against the fancy bathroom wall, shit even the stall had its own mirror.

she got closer and closer to you, only speaking up once she was face-to-face with you again.

"for someone who's never been with a girl before, you seem to know the gay agenda very well" Ellie couldn't help but joke although her face had a smirk smeared all over it.

the little sly remark that left her lips caused your cheeks to flush.

your arms wrap around Ellie's neck, pulling her closer to you "I've never been actively gay, but I should've known when I used to watch "The L word" when everyone was asleep in high school..." you grin, you were kind-of joking.

Ellie lets out a laugh "oh yeah mama, you are definitely into women." you smack her chest teasingly with a smile which she only softly grips your wrist, pulling you into her. now chest-to chest as your faces skim against each other.

♫₊˚.🎧 now playing: DISPO

↻ ◁ II ▷ ↺

"kiss me" it wasn't a question; it was more like a wish.

a wish you knew Ellie would grant whenever you wanted.

"your wish is my command, mama."

♫ ¿qué le habrán hecho a esa bebé? que está rebelá

no le gustaba antes prender

y ahora sin miedo quema

¿será que terminó con él? ♫

Ellie's lips waste no time in hastily meeting yours. the kiss was automatically filled with passion, finally relieving all the tension that oozed between the two of you for the whole evening; falling into the night.

Ellie's tongue swiped against the bottom of your lip softly causing you to let out a stifled whimper, she pulls away momentarily "ya'like that?" she teases, she knows you like it. she wants to hear you say it.

♫ ta dura la bebé, puesta pa ella, se le ve

que ella sabe lo que tiene

por cómo lo mueve ♫

you aren't the type to submit easily but god this time, every part of you was ready to do everything and anything she told you.

you still aren't the type to submit even as her hands raked up and down your back as her tongue loosens your lips ever-so-softly.

"mhmm" you let out threw a bit lip as your eyes hazed out as her lips continued their blissful synchronized rhythm.

"use your words" Ellie divulged.

"i-i like it when you kiss me-when y'kiss me, els" your voice fainted out as it slightly whimpered with the pecks that were being left alongside your face, down to your neck.

'when y'kiss me, els' your whimper replayed in her mind over and over again, like a broken record.

♫ salió a la disco a pasarla rico, a janguear

ahora está dispo, pero no cualquiera le da ♫

Ellies hands went from holding your back to now squeezing the thick flesh of your hips as her clothed corduroy leg came in-between your exposed legs while she leaned into you, burrowing her face into your neck.

Ellie's pecks quickly became open-mouthed kisses as she basically attacked your neck with her lips. she was determined on finding your sweet spot with each kiss she left on your neck, tainting you with her.

every single little suck and kiss from Ellie was a choked moan or luscious snivel. you couldn't help but squirm in her encaged embrace as her palms were flat against the wall, on each side of your head.

"aye milagro!" you lewdly moan out, you removed one of your arms from around Ellie's neck to cover your mouth with your hand. you could feel the smirk that took over her lips once she pulled away.

there it is.

♫¿qué tú crees, bebé?, a ver, olvídate de él

cho-cho-chócame, yo me pierdo en tu piel ♫

she attaches her lips to the nape of your neck which is where lied your sweet spot, softly sucking as you rustled your body against her.

the fabric of her corduroy pants rubbing the slightest bit against your soaked panties.

"hmm, ya'like that too?" Ellie lets out a content hum as she pulls away, continuing her teasing innuendos.

Ellie was a gentleman; she wasn't going fuck you on the first date.

but she knew to bring you otherworldly pleasure beyond just the sexual level.

"mm-yes!" your moan was rushed and hushed as you spoke against your mouth. you loved anything Ellie did to you like a drug, like you had gotten a taste of your own personal crack-cocaine.

Ellie's hands have now made their way to your ass, fondling the flesh through your tight printed dress as it began to ride up with each squirm you let out.

"tell me mama, has he kissed you here?" the question was sincere, Ellie wanted to learn about all of you.

"shut up els, please-do it again" you pleaded as the smallest pout fell upon your lips yet your cat-eyes burning into Ellie's dark and hazed out eyes.

"what did he do to you mama, makin' you fight all this pleasure? he ain't know what to do with all this, hm?" Ellie's demeanor became slightly dominant.

"what makes you think you can you handle me?" you put up a challenge as you picked up on the change, liking it.

she was right, he had never paid delectable attention to the sweet nape of your neck like she just did, but you would make Ellie earn that information.

Ellie didn't say anything, she only harshly squeezed your ass causing a dirty smile to tug your lips as you slightly spread your legs for her knee to fall into your arousal, pressing the forming heat between your legs against her clothed knee.

"believe me mama, once you're all mine. you gon'forget all about him-" she began to ramble against your skin as her lips brushed against each exposed area.

"I can't get emasculated by the fact my baby so strong, the way that body moves-" Ellie continued, squeezing your ass once more when saying "that body" as she pulls you even closer to her, completely off the bathroom wall and chest-to-chest with her.

"I'll get lost in all of your power and beauty, m'not no dumbass-i'll be your throne." Ellie devoted herself to you.

"and exactly for all that, our time will be a lot more special than this restaurant bathroom" Ellie finishes, leaving one last peck on your neck and shoulder before leaning back up to meet your lips with hers.

your heart was overpouring as she fixed your dress for you and even began to carry your mini purse for you.

you think you just fell in love, no. you know you just fell in love.

༺ ♱ ༻ ༺ ♱ ༻ ༺ ♱ ༻ ༺ ♱ ༻

you were both making your way out of the ladies' restroom 20 minutes later, hand in hand.

as you both were making your way to the front of the restaurant doors, you caught a quick glance at the male waiter from earlier which he didn't miss. you turn your head away without a second thought or care for who the man was.

Ellie reaches for the door handle, getting ready to step out.

except a voice calls out abruptly.

"excuse me!?"

you and Ellie's head snap back towards his direction. Ellie stopped herself from pulling the door open, her hand not leaving the handle.

"i wonder how he would feel if he knew his girl was a dyke"

before you knew it, you were seeing red.

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[mattslolita]

hi bae its aid. ok I NEED NEED A enemies to lovers type shit where matt is in a band and hes like hella rock boy omg stop im already shivering just typing this LMAOAOA ok and ik ur ass can deliver with the smut. i luh u

i wanna be your slave - m. sturniolo

in which ... you were so mesmerized by the lead guitarist of your friend's band — who you couldn't stand. and he had felt the same way — or did he? ( rockstar!matt x black!fem reader )

warnings ; smut, oral ( female receiving ), dom!matt, semi-public sex

"𝒊 𝒘𝒂𝒏𝒏𝒂 𝒕𝒐𝒖𝒄𝒉 𝒚𝒐𝒖𝒓 𝒃𝒐𝒅𝒚, 𝒔𝒐 𝒇𝒖𝒄𝒌𝒊𝒏𝒈 𝒆𝒍𝒆𝒄𝒕𝒓𝒊𝒄."

˗ˏˋ ꒰ ♡ ꒱ ˎˊ˗˗ˏˋ ꒰ ♡ ꒱ ˎˊ˗˗ˏˋ ꒰ ♡ ꒱ ˎˊ˗˗ˏˋ ꒰ ♡ ꒱ ˎˊ˗˗ˏˋ ꒰ ♡ ꒱ ˎˊ˗˗ˏˋ ꒰ ♡ ꒱ ˎˊ˗˗ˏˋ ꒰

matthew sturniolo.

you hated him, just couldn't stand him and his arrogance. but, you assumed that's what came with a guy who thought he was the shit just because he was in a band.

it didn't help that you found him extremely attractive too, and he played the fucking guitar to top it off — the only reason you knew these things is because even still, you were best friends with his older triplet brother nick and his friend madi, making the three of you a trio. nick was the photographer for his brother's band, and you and madi were basically the band's best friends.

you were currently backstage with madi, nick, chris, matt, and the band's vocal singer maxine at one of their gigs — the backstage area was spacious, containing all the bands equipment.

chris, madi, and maxine were in a debate about something whilst you sat with nick and conversed with him — matt had his attention on tuning his guitar, a cigarette at the end of his lips, and every few minutes you'd glance over at him to see the way his ring clad fingers plucked at the strings. he looked so focused as his gaze never left the guitar.

"y/n!" nick said, tapping you lightly.

"huh?" you said, snapping back into reality. upon realizing you zoned out, your eyes widened as you turned back to nick. "sorry."

nick raised an eyebrow skeptically and was about to start speaking again until the band's manager walked into the backstage area. "alright, you guys are on in ten. you ladies need to leave now."

nick sighed and pouted at you playfully, and you pouted back. "don't worry, we'll be back as soon as y'all finish!"

"or you can stay gone," matt's voice says sarcastically, his eyes finally fixated on you as he shrugs to you mockingly.

"boy, you wish you could get rid of me that easily," you snorted at him with an eye roll, standing up and crossing your arms over your chest.

it caused matt's eyes to shift down to your cleavage area, as your outfit was pretty revealing considering the way your top did little to hide your breasts and your leather skirt had nearly showed your lacy blue thong you wore underneath.

you rolled your eyes at the way he shamelessly had roved over your body, licking his lips as he did so. taking the cigarette out of his mouth, he put it in the ashtray and dumped it, then stood up to stretch and you could get a clear view of his happy trail.

you looked away before he could catch you staring and followed madi who was walking outside towards where the stage area was.

being that you were the best friends of the band, you and madi were able to secure spots in the front row, where the band would be easily visible.

you had both settled there as the lights dimmed, signaling that the show was about to start. madi nudged your shoulder excitedly, and you giggled at her enthusiasm as people began cheering for them.

the lights were now all the way dim as chris, matt, and maxine came onto the stage — however, your eyes find themselves fixated on matt as he grins whilst holding onto his guitar.

the dim lighting makes his skin look an eerily glowy purple color as you admire the way his muscles flex underneath his wife beater tank top, his black jeans glistening in the light due to the chains that dangle from them. the horse chain around his neck swing slightly as he begins playing his guitar, his ring clad fingers strumming over the chords rythmetically.

you're so mesmerized by the way his fingers move over the guitar you don't see the way that his eyes have found yours as he plays the notes — you inhale sharply as you look up to meet his icy blue gaze, and his lips contort into a content smirk which causes your heart rate to increase.

it's as if only you and him are in the moment, as both of your gazes are unwavering — you're surprised that you haven't looked away, but his gaze keeps you locked in and you feel it beginning to suffocate you as he licks his lips and gives you a once over.

you feel guilty for not even paying attention to the way chris is going insane on the drums or the way maxine's beautiful vocals carry out throughout the club. you've almost forgotten about madi's presence as well, as she was recording them ( which you should've been doing ).

as the song comes to a closing, maxine steps back as matt suddenly takes the center of the stage to play his guitar solo — nick mentioned it when you were talking backstage, but due him already being on your mind you didn't even comprehend it.

sweat beads formed on his forehead as it creased, whilst he slightly bopped his head up and down while he strummed the chords — out of her peripheral vision you could see the other girls in the crowd foaming at the mouth over him, causing you to frown slightly.

his brown locks bounced against his forehead as he lifted his head back up, his gaze finding yours once more as he finishes the last notes — a long, final strum of the guitar as he maintained eye contact with you sent you over the edge.

you needed him.

chris, matt, and maxine came to the center of the stage and bowed, waving and saying their goodbyes to everyone as they all applauded the band.

they exited the stage, and you found your eyes traveling to see where matt had went off to so quickly. "oh my gosh, they did so amazing!"

"uh huh," you said, turning to madi before she got too suspicious, a smile forming onto your face, "that was fucking amazing."

"girl," madi grinned, a small giggle escaping her lips as she nudged your shoulder, "you know i saw how matt was looking at you, right?"

"what?" you say, your eyes widening as you both slowly make your way backstage again.

"y/n, he was clearly looking at you almost the entire time," madi pointed out. "i swear you both are so oblivious."

you both had once again successfully made it backstage, and you almost lost your breath when the first face you saw was matt's — his eyes were trained on yours and you could feel a wetness pool underneath your skirt.

"i'm gonna go use the bathroom," you tell nobody in particular, quickly exiting the room.

you rush to the bathroom, grateful that there was no line, and quickly shut it behind yourself as you looked in the mirror — unfortunately, the door opened and you whirled around, being met with matt and his signature smug smirk as he reached behind him and locked the door.

before you were able to get a word out, he caged you against the sink, both of his arms on it as your ass was pressed firmly against the sink.

he smashed his lips onto yours, and you immediately melted into his hungrily, having been waiting for this the entire night. your hands find the back of his neck as his arms wrap around your waist, slowly inching their way down to your ass, giving it a squeeze.

you gasp into the kiss which grants him access to slip his tongue inside, as you pull you ever so closer — a moan escapes your lips as the sensation causing him to smirk against your lips.

not breaking the kiss his hand travels to the side of the waist and down slowly until they reach the hem of your skirt. you whimper as he sinks his hand inside, rubbing his thumb against your thong.

"matt..." you breathe out, breaking the kiss.

"where do you want me, sweetheart?" he rasps against your neck, beginning to leave kisses there. one finger goes under your underwear as it grazes where you need him most, "...here?"

"please," you beg him, looking up at him with lustful eyes, his eyes darkening at the sight and sound of you.

he quickly pulls your skirt down leaving you in the blue thong, his lustfilled gaze hungry as he eyes you up and down — he leaves more kisses on your neck, slow and sensual as he dips his fingers into your underwear, lightly rubbing on your aching clit.

"fuck, don't tease me," you breathe out, a smirk residing on his face.

"didn't plan on it, baby," he says.

without warning, one finger delves into your folds as you feel the tension finally start to alleviate when it enters inside of you.

"fuckk..." you moan out, throwing your head back at the feeling, giving him more access to suck on your neck, a dark purple mark now covering the brown skin there.

"you like the way i touch you, angel?" he whispers in your ear, speeding his movements up.

"y-yes, matt," you whine out, biting your lip to suppress that so desperately threatened to escape your throat.

"yeah, wore this pretty little thong for me, didn't you?" matt continues, inserting another finger causing a lewd moan to escape your throat, "knew i'd wanna be inside you after seeing this."

"matt, fuck, keep going," you moan, his fingers speeding up.

the squelching of your wet cunt vibrated off the walls and you were sure by now someone could hear what was happening — matt's movements inside you never ceased and you could feel that band tightening in your stomach.

"m' so close," you whined out, gripping his shoulder to steady yourself, feeling your legs go weak.

"yeah?" matt says, leaving another kiss on the right side of your neck, "give it to me, angel."

the band in your stomach snaps and you release all over his fingers, a moan leaving your mouth as you do so — with a grin he takes his fingers out of you and turns you around, licking his fingers clean as he look at you through the mirror.

"let me take these off, yeah?" matt asks and you nod your head and bite your lip as he hurriedly removes your blue thong and throws them to the side.

he quickly undoes his pants and slides them to the side, along with his boxers — his cock springs free from its confines, the tip a pretty but angry pink color as it leaks with precum.

matt drags his tip against your still wet cunt slowly, lubricating it in your juices, causing a moan to fall past both of your lips — you throw your head back as he enters you slowly, letting you adjust to his size before he starts to move.

"mm, yes baby, right there," you moan out, his hips snapping back and forth as he thrusts into you from behind.

"fuck, you're so tight," matt grunts, one hand coming up under your shirt to pinch your nipples causing you to whine. "you like when i fuck you like this, don't you, pretty girl?"

"feels so good," you moan, his thrusts speeding up.

"such a good girl, taking me from behind," matt praises, his other hand holding onto your waist as his cock repeatedly hits your cervix just the way you like.

you feel your second orgasm approaching again, and quickly. "m' gonna cum again, baby."

"i'm close too, angel," matt moans out, "hold it till i say so."

the pace of his thrusts are relentless as his cock repeatedly abuses your cunt — they start to get sloppy which lets you know he's close. he begins leaving sloppy kisses along your neck, sucking harshly on a different spot making another purple bruise on your brown skin yet again. marking his spot.

"fuck, let me cum in this pussy gorgeous," matt grunts and you let out an inaudible noise to let him know he can.

you feel his cum shoot inside of you, painting your walls a creamy color as a lewd moan of your name slips past his lips which causes your orgasm to wash over you as well, your juices mixing with his own.

coming down from your high he pulls out of you as you both catch your breath.

matt looks around for something to clean up with, finding a towel on a rack as he walks over to you with a grin whilst cleaning your legs. "so, how'd you like the show?"

"beside you eye fucking me the entire time, i enjoyed it," you shrugged, a smirk adorning your features.

"oh, but you got what you wanted, didn't you?" matt smirks back, presses a kiss to your lips as he throws the towel in the trash, handing you your underwear.

you slip them on quickly along with your skirt, washing your hands afterward — matt was also now fully dressed as well and before you could try and leave he stops you in your tracks.

"i'll leave first, try not to leave too fast after," he says and before you object, he's already gone and closing the door behind him.

you roll your eyes, but a small smile graces your features at the memory of what the both of you had just done.

( lilly's section 💌 )

this should've been out MONTHS AGO😭😭 she's finally here though, hope y'all fw this🫦

💌 : @luverboychris @muwapsturniolo @prettiest-poision @mattsturniolosleftnut @mrssturnioloo @guccifrog @junnniiieee07 @astrowh0r3 @v33angel @ilovechrissturniolo1 @e1ias3 @l0akkzz @hysteria-things @eyeliketoeatpoosay @sturn777 @stasiesturn @prettypinkprincess15 @breeloveschris @summerssover @mayhem-72 @riasturns @chrissturniolossidehoe @moonk1ss3d @v33angel @h3arts4harry @stargirll567 @bitchydragonparadise @heartsforchrisandmatt @pepsienthusiasts @tillies33ssss @thenickgirl @sturnprime

[st4rc4t]

hasan piker x weed smoking reader hcs

disclaimer! i do not condone underage marijuana usage!! this is just something silly for ppl who do/have smoked weed before. if ur under 21 in the united states don’t do it !!!

cw: marijuana usage, friends to lovers sorta idk the situation is weird, autistic coded reader ? it kinda just happens, semi pining, gn!reader

wc: 1.1k+

a/n: just me and my 3 weed smoking gfs

most of his friends in the youtube/twitch scene also smoke weed so he doesn’t really care

he smokes occasionally but only at night to help wind down a little bit

he doesnt mind the smell but he really hates when his clothes and hair smell like it

so when he’s around you make sure you’re either outside or blowing it out of a window

you never smoke inside his house

he didn’t ask you not to, you just assumed he wouldn’t like it

he doesnt and it makes him blush a little at ur consideration

whenever you get high and he doesn’t, he never says “omg ur so high” while ur trying to talk

cus like . yeah obviously that was the point ! and its not like ur completely different while high, just a little floatier and it takes you a minute to get thru ur sentences

but you talk about pretty much the same stuff and he loves talking to you

and u laugh a lot he likes that too

dont tell anyone tho

you looove getting high with him its such a special treat

ull be gathering ur paraphernalia to take out on the patio and he wanders out of his stream room looking like the sad hamster

he sees you getting ready, getting a bottle of juice and such and asks if he can join u

gasp of course he can !!!!!

asking how fucked up he wants to get so you know the best method of smoke delivery

he wants to sleep Good tonight so indica in the bong it is !

he’s nervous ab the bong so u bring out a bowl too incase he gets cold feet

he watches you get comfy in your seat outside, a comfortable warmth from the california setting sun

arranging everything ready on the table

“you look like a tweaker”

“im gonna make you a tweaker if ur not careful”

he laughs but he keeps watching you carefully pick out a healthy portion from the large bud you have, pushing it into the prongs of your grinder and twisting the two pieces against each other

he watches you pour the contents of a reusable water bottle into the large glass piece, eyeing the level of water

he watches you stop and put it to your lips, taking a pretend hit and making sure the water level is good

he watches you carefully pack the ground up flower into both bowl pieces, using your fingers to pat it level and dusting the excess back into the grinder with each one

you notice him staring but dont say anything until you’re already done

you make him an offering, bong and bowl in each respective hand. eyebrows raised as if to say, “which are we feeling?” but when he continues staring at the contents of your hands, you actually speak.

“dude are you already high, whats going on?” you laugh cautiously, genuinely a little worried but keeping it light hearted. he seems to snap out of it at your voice.

his eyes dart around for a second as he reenters his surroundings, chuckling when your word’s finally register, “no, yeah- sorry… really long day today,” his words fizzle out as he goes along. you cant help but feel bad, you dont know how he deals with streaming sometimes. you also feel weird about giving him a mind altering substance while he already seems spaced out.

setting the pieces down safely on the table, you look at him seriously before speaking, “are you sure you wanna do this? you’re kinda out of it,” you’re hard trying not to sound condescending, but you doubt he can read your tone that well right now anyway.

he smiles the most minuscule amount and looks away, but you see it. “yeah, im sure,” he sighs out gently before continuing, “i need to empty my brain,” he finishes by looking back to you with already tired eyes. you nod in understanding, relishing in knowing exactly how to fix his problem.

picking up the little glass bowl and a lighter, you hand both to him. they instantly look tiny in his hand and you’re not sure how he’s gonna actually do this. after realising you gave him green hit, you remind him to take a small hit. he just rolls his eyes sarcastically and scoffs, like of course he would, but you both know he would’ve blown a lung.

you watch him fumble with the glass, trying to get a good grip that covers the carb and wont burn his hand when he lights it

he eventually gets it and takes a little corner hit

a bit bigger than he was expecting tho so he does that thing where u cough the smoke out

just awful btw

u give him some water hes fine but boy does he love to complain

u just laugh at him and take ur own hit

breathing in deep, holding it for a second, and letting it go watching it escape into the open air

when he sees other people smoke it usually feels more rushed and energetic, like they were trying to ingest as much thc in as little time as possible

but you take your time. gathering everything and getting comfortable, settling into the ritual of the action. you take your time and let yourself feel it, you take your time and make sure he’s fully prepared before offering him anything

oh no he likes you !

he does end up hitting the bong but like the smallest baby hit so it doesn’t even count

he is sooo silly when hes high loves to laugh

he will def devolve into political rants if you let him, but you’re pretty good at making him laugh and redirecting him when hes like this

bc he smoked an indica this time his eyes are even more droopy than they were before and you can tell he’s getting tired

you clean up and follow him back inside amd he goes completely baby mode at the sight of kaya sleeping on the couch

petting her and pressing his face into her fur, going on and on about how soft she is

you laugh and sit on the other end of the big sectional covered in pillows and blankets

when hes done melting into kaya he sits down next to u with his arm around the back of the couch

real smooth .

it works 1000%

watching smth stupid like family guy (genuinely my fave show while high i will not elaborate)

chilling until he decides to go to bed at like 8:30

he convinces u to sleep on the couch bc ur both too high to drive and he would freak out at the thought of u in an uber rn

okay i have to be done i basically wrote a oneshot in the middle bye bye

[luvgumii]

bully!megumi

2k words!!

tw: aged up characters, sadism, bullying, degrading, hair pulling, semi-public, male masturbation.

this is set in university/college, all characters are 18+ and megumi is aged up. if this makes you uncomfortable, please scroll.

a/n: im sorry but i accidentally deleted the request so whoever asked for this i hope u see it!!

megumi fushiguro was someone who you loved and hated.

and someone that you couldn't get rid of.

you stared at the floor where your chemistry experiment lay, the shattered glass that lay scattered across the floor reminded you of your willpower to go through with school. you had the mind to fucking quit and work a lowly job with a measly pay if it meant you didn't have to endure this.

if anyone asked you why you quit school and you said because of your bully, you knew they would laugh in your face and ridicule you. call you weak and that you must not have wanted to graduate considering how 'easy' it must have been to get you to quit.

the quiet sounds of snickers echoing the classroom snapped you out of your trance, and you quickly dropped to your knees to pick up the glass with trembling hands. you already knew who had knocked the test tubes out of your hands, so much so that you didn't even look up or express any signs of annoyance, knowing how much worse it would be if you did.

your shaking hands kept letting the shards slip out, and you let out a sharp hiss when you felt a large piece slice through the middle of your palm. the pain sears through your hand and the tears that you tried to desperately hard to keep it were now threatening to spill. but you still didn't dare lift your gaze.

you squeeze your eyes shut as you feel a hand grab your hair and tug, yanking your head up in the process.

"fuck, you cant do anything right, can you?" he sneered, words cutting through you like a knife. you could already picture the look on his face, one you were familiar with, but made you feel just as incapable every time you saw it.

"are you mute or something? talk." the hand that had a grip of your hair moved back and forth, rocking your head in the process.

you let your eyes flutter open, and they land on his face that was twisted into a sadistic smirk, one you had seen many times before.

but that smirk quickly turned into a deep scowl when you didn't respond instantly, the grip in your hair getting tighter until it felt as if your hairs were being ripped out. your hands fly up to grip his wrist, trying to pry his hand from your hair, but it proves futile.

"a-ah, okay, m'sorry, m'sorry, p-please let go-" you babble, your words coming out in a flurry as he seems to revel in the pained look on your face. he thinks you look so pretty like this.

he's so focused on you that he nearly forgets that he's in a classroom full of other students. it's not as if they care anyway- most of them turn a blind eye. they tell themselves it's just a little bit of rough play between friends and opt to just leave instead of even thinking to help you out.

but obviously, there's a limit to how far he can go in public. when he notices that the usual snickers seem to have died down, and the faces that normally look at you with distaste start to have a slight hint or concern in them, he immediately lets up. his disentangles his hand from your hair, watching the way your body slumps back down on the ground. your hands fall in front of you to steady themselves, the smaller peices of glass digging into your skin.

you don't bother holding back the tears anymore. you let them fall freely, the clear liquid staining your cheeks.

his smirk only seemed to widen when he saw your tears, and he had to force himself not to lean down and lick them off your face. the familiar stretch in his pants appeared when he looked at you on your knees before him, blinking up at him with teary eyes and wet lashes, your plump lips trembling slightly.

he's forced to take his eyes off you when one of his friends nudge him, his face frowning at what he hears. he grumbles, muttering a few words under his breath before turning his attention back to you.

"clean this mess up." his words a cold and blunt, practically pouring salt into your wounds as he turns away and walks out the door as his friends follow. then everyone else filters out quietly, only sparing you a few pitiful glances.

you take a few deep breaths, trying to calm yourself down. you've been through worse. he's done worse. you'll be fine.

he walks down the corridors quickly, shooing off his friends with a lousy excuse as he hurries into an empty bathroom stall and locks the door. he wastes no time unbuckling his belt and tugging down his trousers and boxers, letting out a soft groan of relief as his hard cock slips out of its uncomfortable confines as it hits his abs with a soft slap.

it's swollen and throbbing, his tip leaking pre-cum that trickles down the side of his dick. the length is so pale that it's almost translucent, veins running along it that get thinner as they reach the top. the tip is flushed pink, the slit weeping pre-cum constantly.

he grips his base tightly, hissing at how sensitive he is. he hated himself for this. it felt so dirty every time he got off to your tears, but he couldn't help it. his mind trailed back to your plump lips that were stained with your tears, his hand starting to stroke his cock.

this was a routine for him. he knew he would never get to feel your holes wrapped around him- he had practically ruined all his chances with you. so he was stuck beating his meat in a public bathroom like a fucking pervert. he could feel the heat rush to his cheeks at the humiliation, but his tip leaked even more pre cum at the thought of you cursing him out for being a pervert.

he could already feel his orgasm approaching, you made him feel like a fucking teenager sometimes. he can't even count how many times he nearly came in his pants at the sight of you beneath him. those teary eyes that had an emotion lingering behind them as they gazed up at him- an emotion he could never put his finger on.

he could feel his balls tightening, he knew that this orgasm would probably leave him panting. he tightened his grip, and starts fucking his hips up into his hand using his pre-cum as lube. his other hand pulls his shirt in between his teeth as so not stain his shirt. he lets out a guttural groan as he's about to cum, his hips stuttering and-

the door to the bathroom swings open, creaking slightly as the sound of feet shuffling on the floor is heard.

who the fuck? he was sure everyone had cleared the area, there was no one left apart from one person-

shit. it was you. he peeked through the gap between the door and the stall, his eyes landing on your back as you faced away from him, washing your hands in the sink. he could see your still tear stained face in the reflection of the mirror.

your were leaning forward slightly, your shirt falling further down your chest exposing your cleavage, and his cock weeps even more at the sight. he barely holds back a whimper.

fuck it. so what it you catch him? it's not like you could do anything anyway... plus, he could still feel his orgasm lingering. just a few thrusts...

he starts to fuck his fist again, with much more urgency than before as he tries to be as quiet as possible. he peeks back at you again, and the sight of your ass peeking from underneath your skirt has him letting out a slutty moan, his hips stuttering as ropes of cum spurt out of his cock and onto his abs and hand.

"is someone there?" you question, and he freezes up as you start walking towards his stall.

you had thought the bathroom was empty since all of the stalls had the unlocked symbol on them, but you failed to notice the pair of feet that were visible.

"um, are you okay in there?" you say, and he holds back a whine as his cock twitches in response to your worried tone.

you gaze falls down to the pair of feet in the stall, and you swear you've seen those shoes somewhere before...

"m-megumi? is that you?" you question, not able to hide the slight tremor in your voice.

"yeah." he responds, not bothering to act as if it's not him.

your hands push the stall door open slightly, wondering what he was doing since the door was unlocked, but you definitely didn't expect to see that.

his trousers were still pulled halfway down his thighs, his shirt no longer in between his teeth but resting on his midriff, his abs exposed as well as the spurts of cum that lingered on them. his cock was still hard, his hand gripping it tightly at the base. he was still leaning against the wall, his eyes locked on you.

you couldn't stop but take in his whole figure, the heat rushing to your face as well as somewhere lower. you never expected to see him in this state.

"are you going to keep on gawking on you going to get in and help me?" he says, his voice laced with slight lust. he would rather take his chances with you than never finding out how you feel towards him.

but he wasn't expecting you to walk into the stall and close the door, locking it before turning back to him. but he wasn't about to question you. his hands reach out and grab your waist before pulling you flush against him, and you squirm slightly as you feel his hard cock against your lower stomach.

you can feel his warm breath fanning across your lips, and his eyes are clouded with lust as he looks into your own.

"fuck, you- do you really want this?" he questions, conflict written all over his face.

you hesitate slightly before nodding your head. you're unsure as to why you didn't run out the second you realised he was here. its almost like you're attracted to him.

"need to hear you say it." he murmurs, his hands sliding underneath your shirt to make skin to skin contact as his hands slide around to your lower back.

"I... want this. i want you, megumi." the words sound foreign coming out of your mouth, but you know that you mean them.

he practically growls at your words, his hand coming up to your nape as he brings your lips together.

this kiss is soft yet rough at the same time, his tongue searching your mouth in a show of possessiveness. his lips leave a trail of wet kisses along your jaw and down your neck, paying special attention to your pulse point.

his hand slides up your shirt and into your bra, starting to roughly knead your breast, groaning slightly in content.

"a-ah, wait, megumi-" you fumble over your words slightly, but to your suprise, he pulls back, resting his forehead in the crook of your neck. you can tell he's waiting for you to speak, so you do.

it was if you were his property. he could harass you as much as he wants, but no one else should even so much look at you. you didn't miss the oddly kind he did sometimes.

"um... why are you doing this? I thought you hated me..." you say, cringing slightly at your own words but it was true. he treated you like shit.

verbally degrading you, pushing and shoving you around, and sometimes even pulling your hair like he had done earlier today. but the second someone even made one remark towards you, his fist was flying towards them.

he would drag you over to him by the wrist just to fix your hair and tug your skirt down, calling you a slut but anyone could that he didn't mean it by look of concern in his eyes.

or when you would hurt yourself, he would take it upon himself to bandage you, even if it was partly his fault for the bruise or cut on your body.

his voice would be rough as he called you clumsy for hurting yourself and that you were a waste of space for mot even being able to dress your own wounds. but his hands would be gentle as he cleans and wraps the plaster around your skin.

and you hated it. that you couldn't hate him. the way your heart would flutter when he ran his fingers through your hair in an attempt to fix it, or when he would pull your hair and smirk down at you, you could feel heat coiling in your lower stomach.

"hate you?" he scoffs, shaking his head as he pulls back to look you in the eyes, "im so in love with you that it's fucking pathetic."

"...then why do you-"

"I dont really know how to express myself. and I'm a bit of a... sadist." he says, his face turning a shade of pink.

"i know you don't love me back, I wouldn't expect you to, but just let me have you... please. even if it's only one time." he murmurs, peppering kisses on your collarbone.

your connect your lips to his again, kissing him with slightly more urgency. he was right- you didn't necessarily love him, but you were attracted to him in some sort of way.

plus, this would be the only time this would happen. right?

dividers by cafekitsune

[bigbadvoxbox]

Helllooo! I'm back with another ask

I was thinking a vox getting jealous because Valentino was being Valentino and flirting with (fem) reader and vox marking her up or something like that to just prove that reader is only his- sorry if this sounds confusing lol if it ain't coherent feel free to delete, hope u have a nice day tho!!

-🎶

I love this! I wish bad violent things on Valentino so getting to write him getting rejected and shit will be fun!

warnings: nsfw. possessive sex. also unprotected sex, which u shouldn't do. semi-public/public sex (in a limo). also valentino exists in this. i hate valentino, so im gonna warn u that he's even here. fuck u valentino. marking + biting. vox has kinda like an ownership (?) kink idk what the word is but he likes the concept of you belonging to him. also warning for valentino being a gross pervy scumbag who flirts with anything with a hole.

- It was meant to just be a quick drop by with Vox, as he had to quickly stop by Valentino's studio for a quick discussion. This was your first time actually meeting the infamous Valentino. Vox had never really wanted you to meet him, for reasons unknown, but today he had no choice but to bring you along to his brief meeting.

- It went exactly like he was dreading it would.

- "Where you been hiding this little chula, huh?" Valentino asked, taking the back of your hand, and planting what started off as a light kiss, but very quickly became a long lick, leaving you feeling confused, as well as a bit mortified.

- Vox was very quick to take a step between the two of you, his eye twitching as he tried his best to keep that smile on his face, needing to keep up his stupid little act of respect so that this obnoxious bastard of a man wouldn't throw a tantrum. Valentino has power that Vox can use, so he can't just yet show just how much he dislikes the moth-demon.

- The rest of that quick little chat felt like eternity, and Vox could not WAIT to get the fuck out of those studios. Hell, he was considering fucking the shit out of you right then and there just to show Valentino that he needs to fuck off. He wouldn't outright say anything, but he sure as shit would show Valentino who you belong to.

- You barely got out of the studio and back into Vox's limo when he pounced on you.

- "That prick. He needs to learn to keep his hands off what isn't his." he grumbled to himself as he made quick work of laying you back against the seat, hovering over you. Within no time, your neck was littered with marks and bites, Vox making an effort to make them as visible as possible. Bright and clear enough for even Valentino's blind ass to see.

- Pure jealousy was fuelling him at that moment, as well as possessiveness. He was gonna make sure no other lowlife fucker ever DARED to even think about touching you ever again. That was his job alone. You were HIS girl.

- Part of him considered leaving his name on you somewhere, somehow, but no. That could wait. It would be too rash a decision right now, he should wait until you could both decide on such a thing together when you were thinking clearly. He didn't know if you'd be okay with that, so he decided against it, but the thought definitely lingered in the back of his mind.

- While his hands trailed all over your body, touching and groping everywhere, feeling what's HIS, he revelled in the feeling of your hands on his body too. He knew you only had eyes for him, and that you were just as irritated by Valentino's actions as he was. That only spurred him on, and next thing you knew, the two of you were barely even clothed in the back of his limo.

- Vox had you practically in every position in the back of that limo. At first, he was hovering over you, and it was sweet, close, passionate, then, he turned you two around so he was drilling into you from behind, rough, sinful, and messy. He liked this position, it gave him the perfect view of your bodies joining together as he gripped your hips, while you gripped the car door for stability, your shared heavy breaths fogging up the windows.

- Finally, he had you in his lap, riding him. He sat up, your chests pressing together as he took this opportunity, so close to you, to leave deeper bites and marks, now extending from your neck to your jaw and shoulders, even low enough to your tits.

- The limo was definitely shaking.

- After a couple rounds, you both decided you had made enough of a mess for one day, and had successfully gotten both of your frustrations out of your systems.

- A knock at the limo window caught Vox's attention, and he rolled the tinted windows down a tad, quickly covering you with his shirt. It was Valentino on the other side.

- "You've been parked out here for a while. Thought you were busy?" he said in a snarky tone. Vox couldn't help but smirk slightly, quickly looking for your approval, before rolling the window down a tad more, exposing the mess you two had made, as well as you, now only covered by Vox's shirt, which thankfully covered enough, only leaving you exposed from the collarbones up and the thighs down, but left just enough on display for Valentino to very clearly see the art gallery of hickeys and bite marks that littered your body.

- "We were busy."

[lopsushi]

I just realized, how would the Brotherhood react to Yan Hao from Struggling dad au?

Like if Azure found out only after cutting Wukong’s scroll, he’d be devastated because he just too a cub from his father

If they took Yan Hao with them, Yellowtusk would be the one mostly taking care of them and being another Uncle figure in his life

and finally Peng, Peng would Tease of mess with the cub alot making them has a ton of Semi-play fights/ aka Baby cub planning multiple plans of murder for the bird.

and if Yan Hao was taken by them How would the Monkie dads react?

this has been bothering me for a few days im sorry-

i really wanna know what ideas u have :D

-Cobi

Ohhhh this is actually interesting! Tbh Yan Hao would hate Azure Lion and Peng. Yellow Tusk is the only one he would like.

Azure Lion would be hesitate on Yan Hao because this is Wukong’s cub, and he turns a blind eye on Macaque being the other parent. Also Yan Hao would hate him because he is the one that took his father away (slicing the scroll) and hurting his friends/family. (Mostly sensing his mama discomfort on Azure)

For Yellow Tusk you’re actually right he would be another uncle for Yan Hao.

Then Peng…nope. Yan Hao would hate him and Peng would hate Yan Hao. So hatred lol

Also! If they were to take him you better believe they’ll have two pissed off parents on their butts!

I hope this answers your question ☺️

[smutinlove]

rq

Can u do carl grimes angst

after glenns death, negan has an impact on carl and y/n so they have very bad angst every day then negan notices and makes the situation worse so like he makes y/n try to k1ll carl to make her feel guilty

IM SO SORRY

"Rage Filling-up Semi-trucks"

You could still remember his face, Glenn's face. His sad and pleading eyes looking at his wife, Maggie, as he said the words, "Maggie—I'll find you." Those were the finals words that he spoke, those words haunted you and everyone.

Carl wanted to kill Negan, he hated him for what he did to both Glenn and Abraham. Both were strong and honest men who were loved to the moon and back. And now they were gone. And what really was the icing on the cake was that Negan would come by Alexandria and take resources, leaving the Alexandrians with barely anything.

And this enraged everyone.

You sat on the sofa, feeling helpless and miserable. You wished that he wasn't gone. Glenn was a father that you never had and always wanted. He was the light of your life. You didn't know how you were going to spend the rest of your life without him.

As your thoughts spiraled into a tornado, Carl walked by, his hair was dripping wet. He must've gotten out of the shower. "Are you okay?" asked the boy hovering over you.

Are you okay? Are you okay? Are you okay? Are you okay? Are you fucking okay?

Simply, no. You weren't. "Do I look okay, Carl? Do I fucking look okay? Glenn was a father to me. He was my best friend too. And now he's gone and I'll never seen him again!" You yelled with the force of a hundred thunderstorms. Your voice was unshaken.

"I miss him too! It's not just you, okay? I loved Glenn. He was family! I miss him all the time, every waking moment, I yearn for him." Carl replied.

He was right. It wasn't just you that missed him. Everyone missed him. Everyone who was present at the lineup missed him. Glenn was someone that was unforgettable. He changed and saved lives, including yours.

"Fuck. Congratulations, Carl! You were right, again! You're always right, aren't you? You and your smug smile," you scoffed. "Y/N, don't. Don't do this to me," he pleaded, his eyes watery, bringing you back to the night filled with terror.

"Fuck you for being right. Fuck you for being you." You ran out of the house, tears pouring down your cheeks. You couldn't believe it. He was being an asshole.

You heard a loud rattle of metal. "Rick, come on out! Let me in, baby! I need my shit now!" An all too familiar voice yell. Negan wasn't supposed to come for another week. Well, that's Negan Smith, the murderer of Glenn Rhee and Abraham Ford. So, you couldn't expect much from him anyway.

You watched as Rick went over and opened the gates of Alexandria. Negan, along with his crew, came in. "Woah, Rick! This shithole stinks. You ever use a bit of Febreze every now and then?" Negan joked.

You couldn't stand looking at him. You wanted to kill him and rip both his eyes out. But you needed a better plan. A plan that would guarantee Negan dead.

You went back inside and saw Carl putting his gun into his holster and a switchblade in his boot. You glared at him. You hadn't forgiven him yet.

It was definitely too early. "Y/N."

"What?" you replied.

He went closer to you, "Come on, we can kill that motherfucker together."

"You know what I want to do? Yeah, I wanna torture him. I want to rip his eyes out and cut his tiny little dick off. Then, I wanna bash his skull in like he did to Glenn."

Carl tilted his head.

"Y/N, we can do that together."

"No! Fucking no! I'm doing it alone. I don't want you with me. I'm not fragile. I never fucking was!" You yelled. You pushed him away.

"Y/N, you can talk to me."

"But do you listen? You just make it about yourself. Always trying to relate to make ME feel better. God, fuck you." you slapped him.

You went into the kitchen and opened a cabinet, you pushed away few boxes of stale cereal and grabbed the undocumented guns and knives. You picked a pistol and a switchblade.

You hid the switchblade in your boot and grabbed a holster from a different cabinet and put it on and tucked your gun in there. You adjusted your shirt, letting it hide the gun.

As you started to leave the house you said, "Carl, don't you think about following me."

You left, slamming the door. As you made your way down the porch, you heard someone call your name. "Oh, Y/N Rhee! It is Rhee, right? That's your last name."

The way your name rolled off his tongue, gutted you in a hundred ways, all ending with the same thing. Rage.

Y/N Rhee. He called you Y/N Rhee. Rhee. That was Glenn's last name. And he was using your name to ridicule Glenn's.

"Fuck you, Negan," you muttered.

He heard it. "Woah, the little miss can bark."

You looked around, no one was around. Not Rick, not Carl, not even Negan's goons. You discretely lifted your shirt up and grabbed the gun. You cocked the gun and ran to him, tackling him to the ground.

You put the gun to his forehead.

"I know you're sad. I've felt that pain before."

"No! You don't get to tell me about said. You do not get to do that. You're a monster. You are the fucking devil, Negan. And I'm ending it for you. Not tomorrow or later. But today."

Negan chuckled.

"No, you won't, dear. You're too pathetic and weak," said Negan.

It wasn't true. He was wrong. You had a strong will to kill him. And there was nothing preventing you to kill him. Nothing. You already had your finger on the trigger. You just needed to put a little bit more weight and he'd be bleeding out on the hot and rough ground, staining it.

"Do it. I dare you."

You couldn't. You got up and tucked your gun back in your holster.

"You know, you should never have your finger on the trigger if you're not ready to shoot. Have you ever even shot someone?" He asked.

You had. A few times. To you, those people you'd shot before were meaningless enemies. But to someone else, they were family.

"Yeah."

Negan nodded and sat next to you on the porch. "You know, kid, I'm sorry," Negan said with a smile.

"No, you're not," you replied. "You know that boyfriend of yours, Carl, right?"

You nodded.

"I heard you two fighting. Y'all were fucking loud! And I gotta say, that sounds like a fucked up relationship. Maybe It'd be better if he's dead." Death is something we all near each year and yet we try and stray far from. But now you had the opportunity to do it.

It'd be better. You two fought a lot. "Think about it, Y/N. It'd be freeing," and with that, he left.

You went back inside and grabbed your switchblade that you'd tucked in your boot earlier. Carl sat on the sofa, he looked angry.

"Oh, hey, Carl," you called out. "Hey, Y/N, listen, I'm sorry."

Everyone was sorry, but did they fucking mean it? No.

You charged at him and pushed him off of the sofa. You pinned him to the ground and brought your blade up to his throat.

"Y/N, don't do this."

"Stop telling me what I can and cannot do!" You yelled.

You brought the blade closer.

"I heard everything Negan said!" He blurted out.

You looked away, mortified. You listened to Negan Smith. You actually let him get inside your head. With that thought, tears streamed down your cheeks. "I'm sorry, Carl," you said.

You tossed the blade aside and the two of you got up and hugged each other.

"I let him get into my head. I let him... I'm sorry, I'm so fucking sorry."

"You don't have to be. Negan is just another fucked up, psychopath with parental issues who murders innocents for fun."

You laughed.

It was so fucking true.

───── ❝ authors note ❞ ─────

hey, whats up?? anyway.. i havent written in a long time so i decided to grace yall with my presence. HAHAHAH

anyway could yall tell i was listening to all too well and because i liked a boy?? HAHAHHA there are so many silly little references.

anyway send me more reqs!!

[leynaeithnea]

*comes in dancing to hide the tears*

Soooo, a winion told me you have thoughts on Not sorry for loving you?

WE’RE SO BACK MY LOVE (i was the winion)

OKAY LETS GET GOING THANK YOU MY FRIEND

Not Sorry For Loving You

BOY, i was worried about this song & how it made the events play out considering the odyssey, and I’m satisfied enough with it and I have A LOT to say (i think)

First we start out with the same….tip-tap thingy instrument we had with Love In Paradise, but lower, which DEF is something specifically in music and I’m excited for the musican reactors on youtube start to react to it, and pick it apart (like major/minor)

But its an exact mirror of the beginning of Ody waking up at Calypsos island, is it because things on the island stay the same I wonder? Mhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh (its so beautiful)

Someone arrived today (HERMES , we can hear her take a breath and brace herself for what she has to tell Ody)

They said they′re taking you away (FUCKING FINIALLY, ITS ONLY BEEN WHAT, 7 YEARS???)

That you’re not mine to save (Oh…OH now this one…this can refer to several things 1. calypso “saved” him when he washed up on her island and patched him up 2. she thought she could “save” him from his dark thoughts and everything? “i can fix him” vibes? 3. shes talking about herself and “youre not the one who will safe me”)

And soon I won′t get to see your face (…….i know this probably because of rhyming purposes, but i like how this kind of implies she cares more about his looks than him xD)

So I came by to say (interesting, does she leave him alone completely, did she start leaving him alone after his breakdown at the cliff? or does she just not tend to go to the beach when hes sitting at the beach crying every day? mhhhhhh)

You’re unlike anyone I have ever known (…he is unique)

‘Cause you′re all I′ve ever known (…….thats just sad, i teared up at some part during the stream, im not sure if it was this or the end of charybdis,..but yeah)

WANGUIS VOCALS ARE BEAITUFUL; THE MUSIC- ITS

ITS SO GOOD, im in love

And if I pushed you

Or if I came on too strong (“if”, ok…miss hypothetical, and miss “i” messages, if she pushed him, he literally refused her from the start and she kept going and told him to bow down………….”if”, as in “thats what you say I did and maybe thats true but probably you made that up”, can i see this as her just now looking back and being like “yeah….maybe that was too much?”, maybe, but if this was the first time in seven years that she reflected on her own actions, then she has ISSUES still)

Or if I ambushed you (the song keeps things very vague, but I see this as a way for Jorge to semi-confirm the assault, or at least to not erase it, ive seen a lot of conflicting views on the song, from “not specfic enough about the SA as it should be” and “this song proofs that calypso is innocent” and Jorge probably found a way to let both interpreations co-exist, that being said I will be excited for animatics that will lean into the more Odyssey-accurate interpreation)

For that, I’ll say I was wrong (you say you were wrong, but you dont say you’re sorry for it?… aha)

And if you hate me (“if” you hate me, not like she FORCED him to stay on her island for SEVEN YEARS, girlie aint you the one trapped too in this interpretation? :) :) :) u should know how it feels, if you had ANY sympathy and goodwill for him at heart instead of selfishness you would’ve let him go years ago, like….7 years)

Then I am sorry my love′s too much for you (THIS is the biggest proof to me that this whole song is just BIG emotional manipulation, “my love is too much for you”, she blames HIM, for her feelings, like he is at fault that he cant deal with her emotions, instead of her being able to respect his boundaries and keep herself in check after his INSISTENT refusal), again the VOCALS THO

But I’m not sorry for loving you (eh, valid, but also rly guilt tripy, yk? You dont have to be sorry for your feeligns, but you have to be sorry about the way you act if it harms someone (WHICH YOU JUST TALKED BAOUT BUT DIDNT APOLOGIZE FOR, so shes not sorry for loving him, she - on some level – understands that she has hurt him, but she doesnt say shes sorry for her actions)

AND THEN A CHOIR to back her up? there was none in Love in Paradise, so its interesting that one appears now, is it because her emotions are stronger now and they’re overwhelming her? is she trying to use her godly power to convince him to stay? no matter what, they sound lovely, and i gasped when i first listened and had to replay it them, it does kind of sound like theyre trying to pressure ody

“Calypso-” THATS pretty much all he gets to say, MY HEART, he tries to speak, having let her vent that all out but…)

Let me speak (SHE INSTANT INTERRUPTS HIM?? THE AUDACITY? GIRL SHUT UP AND LET THE MAN SPEAK, another BIG red flag of this being a lot of emotional manipulation here, especially since she continues with giving her “sad sob story/explanation”, right after its like “yah i did bad but look at my sad story, this is why I did all this, you cant blame me)

I spent my whole life here (isnt it paradise calypso??? doesnt it have all that you want there, all that you need there?? mmhhhhhhhhHHHH someone was dishonest >:) )

Was cast away when I was young (sad, yeah i do feel bad for her about this, but that does not excuse her actions)

Alone for a hundred years (thats a long time i suppose, but for a goddess maybe not that much

I had no friends but the sky and sun (actually love that line)

So when you washed ashore I thought for sure that you were my dream come true (….ah, yes, that makes sense, latching onto the first good thing you come across, hopeless romantic, but being completely blind to the fact that the thing has free will, is actually a human with complex feelings and you were so obsessed with the IDEA of having someone who loved you that you extremely hurt them an,. ofc its the psychological explanation, of course she deserves better, but how she acted was NOT okay, no matter her reasoning)

I thought I knew (you knew…what? thats interesting that she doesnt end that line…and i honestly cant figure out what she implies there, she thoguht she knew that he loved her? that he DOESNT love her, she thought she knew what love felt like? what being loved felt like? OR thought she knew that he was a gift send by the gods? (as it is in the Odyssey iirc..Im not sure on this rn tho, so dont quote me)

The music…is so fricking beautiful in this….we have another refrain, but this time the choir backs her up on the words for “you, too strong, you, was wrong, me, and then the Uuh build up for the the not sorry for loving you”, which just emphases the words again i suppose, and makes her get more emotional? mhhhh not sure! it sounds great tho)

“Im not sorry”, so in the end, even IF she was wrong….shes not sorry, whatever she did to hurt him, the base line is, that she’s not sorry. She should be.

I′m angry and tired and restless and sad (valid feelings, but its all about how you express those…maybe you should get therapy)

I’m stuck in the moments I swore that we had (you swore, but maybe, maybe you just imagined them, because you were so desperate to believe there was actually any love from him, that you made yourself believe his rejections ended up being signs of love after all…thats not healthy, get therapy, rip to jorge tho, i believe i saw a thing that said he wrote it when he was in a low point in life, Id think hes better now, but still, unreciprocated love DOES hurt a lot, so ouchy)

I wish you would chase me (the way that you chase him….mhm)

Or try to embrace me (but he never does because even after SEVEN YEARS, he somehow hasnt warmed up yet….)

For once, I wish you would lie and say (……aha, like him lying would make any difference? because then you could make yourself believe that what you did wasnt wrong? that theres hope for you? girlie you have to learn to accept that, if you want him to lie to you, youre in a BAD spot. do fricking better.)

I love you (…………..okay……okay, so…..that line makes the whole song controversial….from the animatic we saw that right after these lines odysseus turns away with an empty/determined expression and no regret or guilt on his face what-so ever, and we can also hear that his voice sounds desperate, dare i saw close to breakdown (slightly out of breath, because he interrupts her, trying to get a word in, my first interpretation was that he was worried and tired, and gave in to her demands, scared to refuse her)

and then theres a breaths pause

You do? (she sounds so HOPEFUL, like she ACTUALLY would believe him if he said it, and i think in this moment Odysseus too realizes that just saying him him, would make it worse, so he sort of back paddles a bit?)

But not in the way that you want me to (because i see not a single clue in the rest of the music that would indicate that he as any positive emotions for her, and i rly just cant imagine him feeling any positive emotions for her even if she did NOTHING else than keeping him on the island, (which is VERY unlikely imo), but its also interesting because thats pretty much as well as vague as the odyssey leaves it, so its kindaaa more accurate again? except that we do not get any cue about ody’s view on the whole situation, we see him sitting at the beach, yes, but we dont get a single “as she wished but he did not” moment…so, thats up to the animators or maybe, maybe, one day jorge confirming or denying anything….but yeah, whatever Calypso feels, Odysseus does reciprocate the sentiment, I like thinking that she did try to guilt-trip into staying and that he ACTUALLY feels guilty for leaving her……….the rest of the saga has elements where I will read A LOT more into the scenes than is written out, so i might be over-analysing them at some point and projecting what I want it to mean into it…but alas)

I hate that I fell in love with you (yeah understandable)

Why did I fall in love with you? (because you were lonely girlie)

What do I do with this love for you? (process it and move on eventually, you got eternity to get over it)

How am I supposed to get over you? (therapy)

Why in the world won′t you love me too? (because HE HAS A WIFE WHO HAS BEEN LOING FOR FOR 20 YEARS )

The ending music is beautiful, but aT LAST he is sailing off

[jinxedmuse]

고갤 들어 헤매다 꽃은 피어

🌒 purple rose — yoon jeonghan 윤정한

🎵 all night - beyoncé, bartender - lana del rey, kiss me - cassie, fantasize- ariana grande, girls need love (w/ drake) - summer wlkr, so anxious - ginuwine, like i need u - keshi, tumblr girls - geazy, next to you - bryson tiller, 7 exp ver - jk

in which: you find out that your cranky boss at your bartending job turns out to be quite the mischievous co-host of an exclusive bdsm club. not wanting to back down, you try to ignore this new found info when at work. but once blurred lines are already crossed, can they really be forgotten?

authors note: hiiii! im kinda proud of this:?/! (spoiler i hate this rn) this is part 1 of 2. started writing this 4 days ago after watching thing 1 & thing 2 & developing a filthy jh brain rot >< not proof read (clearly , ew) but enjoy plz & ty :,)!!

warnings: fem biology, v frequent cursing, absolute filthy smut (bdsm including but not limited to: degradation/praise, oral/cunnilings, raw sex,consented force, restricting toys, & etc) angst (?), alcohol, use of mj, pet names; princess, darling, slut

tags: 25 y/o bartender!reader x 27 y/o boss!jeonghan — boss/subordinate to fuck buddies to lovers (?)

friday 5:48pm kst

you exit the employee break room after hearing some frustrated curses and grunts. to no surprise, you see your boss yoon jeonghan, struggling with something up front.

you approach him cautiously, “you okay boss?” once you’re by him, you see clearly what he’s struggling with; the tap handle.

shit.

you were supposed to tell him about that problem like an hour earlier.

“no. it’s this stupid fucking lever that won’t go down and when i try-“ you listen to his complaints silently, biting your bottom lip. a habit you’ve formed whenever you get anxious.

he realizes how quiet you suddenly got and he pauses, looking at you with a slightly raised eyebrow.

“why do you look like you know this already?”

fuck fuck fuck.

you let out a stale laugh, jokingly slapping his back. “haha what? no way, is that the tap handle? yeah so about that, i meant to tell you earlier but i forgot because i was busy with the..?”

the? the? the absolutely nothing. the truth is you forgot all about the stupid, useless lever as soon as your boss walked into work. his sleeves rolled up, his first two buttons unbuttoned and his semi-long hair pulled into a ponytail.

he takes a step back from you, putting his face in his hands and taking a deep breath. he drops his hands, putting one into his pocket and taking his other hand and poking your shoulder back with every few words he said up until you were completely back up unto the wall behind you.

“the first thing i asked you when i walked in here, was if there was something i needed to know. cat got your tongue staring at me or what?”

your head hit the wall slightly. not enough to hurt but enough to make your breath hitch. you were starting to get aggravated with the demeaning tone he constantly had with you.

you muster up your best apology, wanting to get this over with as soon as possible.

“i really am sorry. won’t let it happen again boss.”

he lets out a sardonic laughter before completely turning his back to you and garnering attention from the rest of the team.

“when i ask you if there’s something i need to know, you tell me immediately. not less than an hour before opening, yeah?” he says clearly and sternly. eyes going cold for a moment.

they all nod their head in compliance, looking at you from the corner of their eye. some out of pity and some annoyance.

almost as soon as it was there, his mild scowl left. replaced with his notorious, easygoing smile. he claps his hand before looking at his watch. “great. everybody take positions, we open in 10 minutes.”

saturday 12:39 am kst

“i’m seriously, seriously, so fucking over him. as soon as i rack up enough money for a new apartment elsewhere, i’m quitting this job,” you say with a huff, falling back into your reclinable chair.

your best friend, hae won had picked you up from work after your 8-hour shift and brought you home. you both were currently on your patio as she let you vent your heart out into the night.

she lays out a blanket over you and goes to sit down across from you. “babe, you say that after every shift.”

you set down your drink in exasperation. “you don’t know what he’s like. he’s so fucking passive-aggressive- scratch that, just aggressive. only towards me!” you complain while flailing your arms.

she looks at you, amused by your expressive way of telling stories and the reactions that match them.

“and you think he’s singling you out?” she asks raising an eyebrow.

“he might as well be! dude, i fuck up once in a while and it’s like i’m begging on my knees to keep my job, meanwhile that jisoo guy- which i’m sure they’re friends by the way, could sleep on the job and he’d probably get a raise. it’s like they’re evil twins!”

hae won lets out a sympathetic laugh before speaking. “hm i would’ve never thought he was like that. he’s hot. like, beautifully hot. especially when he has his long hair?”

she lets out a cat call-like whistle into the air and you both erupt in laughter.

“i mean, i guess he is,” you say as y’all simmer down, agreeing with her comment. to deny it would be a blatant lie. if there’s one thing yoon jeonghan, it was beautiful.

his hair is always perfectly styled. he had these intense eyes when he was focused on working. he’d roll up his sleeves and sometimes stand behind you, instructing you how to work something with a low voice.

she interrupts you out of your thoughts, eyes scheming with a look that says she has a plan.

“you know what you need?” she asks getting closer to the table. you look up at her desperately. eager to hear what it is she has to say this time.

“to get laid. like some mind-blowing sex that distracts you from all this work bullshit.” she deadpans.

you let out a stale laugh, not taking her seriously. “right, and where am i gonna find the time for that? and don’t say a dating app because i’m cursed with those things.”

her face remains serious, a glimmer of mischief in her eyes.

“wanna know a secret?” she asks while scooting her chair closer to yours. you lean into her, slightly curious at what random, outrageous plan she is cooking up.

“i have a club i go to,” she says simply. you back up & look at her perplexed; was this the big secret that she was supposedly hiding?

you pick up your beer, taking a sip. the cool foam hitting the back of your throat before the actual drink does. “what club? did a new one open in Hongdae?”

she takes a sip from her can, a non-alcoholic beer, while slightly shaking her head. “no, not that type of club. they’re having an event this weekend, come with me on sunday?”

now you’re skeptical, had your best friend been lured into something? “this better not be some cult shit, i already deal with enough of those recruiters on the way to work.”

hae won loosens up now, returning to her playful nature and laughing at your claim. “it’s not. i promise, i’ve been there before.”

you thought this through for like half a second. you had work on monday but so what? you haven’t made an impulsive decision in a while.

“alright, why not.”

hae won claps in excitement, eyes practically beaming with delight. she had finally roped you into her plan.

she finishes up her drink and starts getting up while speaking.

“good! wear all black, doesn’t matter what and make sure it’s ‘accessible’ if you know what i mean.”

grabbing her coat and purse, she winked and left. heading home for the night.

sunday 10:15pm kst

your rush up to your best friend's car while pulling down your mini-trimmed black skirt. it had paired up well with an off-the-shoulder, see-through, black button-up shirt that you were wearing with no bra.

you had decided against safety shorts after thinking about it for like 5 minutes in front of your mirror before just saying fuck it.

a big regret.

“get in, we’re already kinda late.”

you get into the car, close the door, and start zipping up your black, knee-high, faux leather boots. “well hello to you too, princess” you say jokingly.

she was wearing almost the same thing as you but instead of a top and skirt combo, she had opted for a sheer, slightly see-through, button-up mini-black dress with thigh-high boots.

“oh and put this on once we reach” she hands you what seemed like a masquerade mask. it had a gold band with cute gold fringes and small cat-like ears at its peak.

that didn’t stop you from being completely thrown off guard though. “dude what type of fucking club is this?”

she puts a finger on her lips before starting the engine and pulling out of the lot. “shh just trust me, this shit is gonna rock your mind”

10:28 pm kst

when you finally arrived at the destination, you looked through the car window and your mouth immediately dropped.

undoing your seatbelt, you got out of the car with your best friend who was taking quick and hasty steps towards the front door.

you follow her and find yourself standing in front of the giant double doors, practically in a state of shock. “why are we at a mansion right now?” you ask while trying not to freak.

hae won looks at you, smiling before pulling her mask up to her face and ringing the doorbell once and then knocking on the door twice. “nice, right?”

“yeah but where is the club? you know what—fuck this, i’m out” you start walking away but your best friend tugs you back and quickly hands you your mask once more.

you give her a stern look but the door starts unlocking and you find yourself immediately putting on the mask.

the guy that opens the door looks like he came straight out of a dream. he was large with broad shoulders and muscular arms almost as big as your thigh. his hair was blonde and kinda of long, stopping right by his ear, styled perfectly. his eyebrows dark and prominent.

he was wearing a black and red masquerade mask with emerald green accents. he opens the door wider and with a deep husky voice, he finally speaks up.

“so, what is it tonight ladies?” he asked while holding up a variety of different colored wristbands.

your best friend speaks up for the both of you, knowing you were still shocked. “both single, both bicurious.” she rushes out.

she then takes your hand in hers and walks through the door, standing in front of the man.

he lets out a genuine laugh. skies above, it was so sexy. he then closed the door, taking two pink wristbands and wrapping them around both your wrists.

his big hands were warm and scruff but clean, it was obvious he worked out. yet he was being gentle as if we were delicate flowers.

he looks up, accomplished. “right all set, follow me.” before we gave a reply he already turned his back towards us, heading deeper into the mansion.

the further in we went, we started hearing low r&b music, like some actual baby-making music. there were all types of girls and guys and people in general of different heights, wearing different clothes, and in different masks, each with a different colored wristband.

he stops in his tracks and you almost bump into his large back, smack dab with what seems like a tattoo peeking out from under his collar. he turns around, holding you steady.

his touch was warm and stern and very caring like a worried leader. he rubs your shoulder before dropping his hands and speaking up once more.

“alright, ladies. drinks are to your left, rooms are upstairs, enjoy yourself” and with that he walks off, heading to a group of guys, all seemingly just as attractive.

you finally turn towards your best friend who seems to be just beaming under her mask, taking in her surroundings.

“okay, now fess up. what is this place?” you ask in a hushed whisper. she looks up at you innocently.

“let’s just call it a bdsm castle, yeah?” she says all too casually.

“oh. you’re fucking joking.”

“nope” she pops the p and scans the room some more before looking back at you.

“and you’ve been here before?” you ask, wide-eyed.

“yes, well once with that one ex that was an investment banker.” she then takes your hand and starts walking with you, going further into what seemed like the lounge room.

you were nervous, super nervous. you wanted to bail and quite frankly you should’ve but behind your already jarred morales, your subconscious was screaming “why the fuck not” and to be honest, you were intrigued.

“what the hell am i supposed to do here?” you ask curiously

“what the hell else? mingle, fuck, have fun. seriously anything.” she starts. she then nods her head towards a group of people that are standing by a piano, drinks in hand while in deep conversation. “you see those people with the white wristbands? they’re observers.”

squinting your eyes in their direction you could see their white wristbands. you turned towards her, curiosity growing by the second. “observing for what?”

“means they’re not here to have sex. just here to watch people have sex. voyeurism or some shit, at least for today i guess.” she says quickly before moving on.

“pink means single and willing to get laid basically and red means in a relationship but willing to get laid.” she further explains.

you look at her perplexed. “so cheaters come here to get their dick wet?”

hae won laughs at your remark but shakes her index finger signifying no. “mainly means that they’re polyamorous and looking for a third or fourth or whatever it is they’re into.” she breaks down.

the essence of this place was starting to make sense. you nod, showing your comprehension and edging her to keep talking.

“oh, and you’re not allowed to say your name. you don’t need a code name or some shit but usually, these things are exclusive and private ie: CEOs, your local librarian. anyone could be here and unless you decide you want to sleep with them, which is the only time you can take off each other's mask, you can’t ask for their name.”

you look at her with a sly smile. “you know for someone who's only been here once you sure do know a lot.”

“oh, did i say once? I thought i said twice. i’m thirsty, are you thirsty? i’ll go get us a drink” before you could reply she was already making her way to the bar.

she orders the drinks but lingers, it seems like she is flirting with the bartender who has dyed hair. he was wearing a slightly orange and silver mask with pointed cat ears. he was tall and lengthy, his movements clumsy yet still confident as he made the drinks.

you rolled your eyes in adornment, looking around. your feet were hurting, they were low-heeled boots but still. you sit down on a lounge couch and roll your ankles slightly.

“you okay there?” a voice asks in a dialect you aren’t quite used to. it sounded more like an accent from elsewhere. their voice was smooth.

you look up and a slim and tall man has come up to you. he has multiple earrings and fiery red hair styled nicely. he had on a green mask with gold lining. he was holding a drink in his hand, which seemed like some type of wine and you noticed that his nails were clean and painted.

you smile before remembering your mask. standing up, you approach him and stretch out your hand to shake his. his hand meets yours, a white wristband around his small wrist.

“here to watch?” you ask. he leans in closer to you, your hand still in his. his voice was low and smooth, yet full of personality.

“that’s only if you allow me,” he says, tugging you slightly closer to him. his actions were bold, making your face heat up almost immediately but he radiated a type of calmness to him that you rarely saw in men nowadays.

just as he’s about to whisper something in your ear, someone else joins you too. slinging an arm around his shoulder and pulling him back away from you.

“aw not fair man, you know i called dibs.” said the new man.

dibs?

now he was a sight for sore eyes. even the bunny-shaped white mask couldn’t hide the fact that there was certainly a handsome face underneath.

his almost jet-black hair was long and had a sheen to it that made you know he took proper care of it. it hung over his face, well mask, with only one side tucked behind his ear. his eyes through the mask were mischievous and his tone playful. he was wearing a prada suit with its tie lazily undone, barely holding it together.

the guy in the green mask let out a small laugh. “i was only introducing myself” he said, keeping his eyes on you.

“yeah well introduce yourself elsewhere. besides, your twin asked me to call you over.” the mysterious man said, nodding his head towards the bar.

mr. green mask looked back and you followed his gaze. sure enough, you saw the guy with oreo hair waving him over. your best friend looking up at him lustfully.

he cleared his throat, biting the inside of his cheek at the sight. he slowly stirs his wine, taking the last sip while not breaking eye contact with them. he looks back at you swiftly, excusing himself before walking over to them.

you were now alone with the guy wearing the bunny mask. he approached you confidently, taking 3 long strides towards you but he didn’t stop there. he kept going until you fell back onto the couch. both of his hands were at your side, keeping you in place. the move felt eerily familiar to your boss.

nope. you weren’t going to do that. think about your boss on a weekend? you refused.

you finally spoke up to him directly, even leaning in slightly, not backing down from the confident man.

“someone seems interested.” you tease all whilst maintaining eye contact.

“oh trust me, very,” he replies back before you can even finish your sentence. he then takes a hand and brings it up to your face. you flinch, not scared of him but about your mask.

“relax darling, in due time,” he says. he leans in closer, your face now practically inches away from each other. he then raises a leg, putting his knee in between your legs. once positioned, he straightens himself up, now looking down at you.

with one hand now in his pockets once more, he uses the other to gently cup your face; his slender and cold fingers slightly squeezing your cheeks. you felt like a doll under his touch, your face gradually growing warmer.

“hm someone getting hot, huh? you interested?” he asks, not breaking eye contact. still cupping your face, one of his fingers, his thumb specifically, grazes over your now pouted lips underneath the mask.

you nod, almost too frozen to speak but he shakes his head, kissing his teeth.

“c’mon darling, we’re grown. use your words.” he insisted, cupping your face a bit tighter now. this makes you respond almost immediately.

“very interested.” you manage to get out.

he laughs at you. “atta girl” he says, as if he knew full and well the effect he had on you. a familiar heartbeat appeared in your cunt, you could already feel it getting warmer as you got more excited.

he lets go of your face and backs up from the couch. he straightens himself up and slightly cracks his neck, relieving the tension from looking down at you.

he then offers you the palm of his hand. you look at it for a second but he takes it as hesitation.

“don’t worry, i don’t bite; that is of course unless you want me to.” his voice sounded like a trance, you could tell he was the type to be able to convince someone to walk off a cliff if he truly wanted to.

you take his hand and he jolts you up, pulling you into him. he catches you effortlessly, wrapping an arm around your waist lazily. he gets closer to you, his cologne smells good, probably expensive.

he whispers in your ear as if no one else in the room full of other people who had the same plan, needed to hear your intimate conversation.

“let’s go find ourselves a room.”

11:16 pm kst

the masked man walks you to a secluded area of the house. stopping right before a door that seemed to have a keypad instead of a keyhole.

he looks back at you once more, raising an eyebrow . “not backing down?” he asks, tone hopeful that you say no.

honestly, this wasn’t your style. sure you’ve had a one night stand before but this whole bdsm castle thing? you felt like a virgin all over again.

yet there you were, anticipating for this masked man to fuck you funny. your cunt already slick with wetness, his actions from earlier had a strong effect on you and you wondered just if this man could truly satisfy you.

you nod, stepping closer to him and the door. “not backing down.” you say firmly, keeping direct eye contact.

with that, he punches in some numbers and the door clicks open. he leads you in and you have to mentally stop yourself from your jaw-dropping. the room was huge, all the furniture black and the bed could easily fit at least six people on there.

you stepped closer, taking it all in. at the head and feet of the bed, there were stainless steel handcuffs. at the foot of the bed, there was a thick rope lying on top of the bedroom bench.

you touched it gently, tracing a finger along it’s rigid and dry nylon. was he planning on using this on you? and almost as though he read your mind, he kept up behind you, leaving no space for imagination.

his hard cock twitching against your ass, his chest against your back. he brought down his still-masked face into the crook of your neck, pulling you into a back hug, arms wrapped around your waist.

“you wanna use that tonight darling?”

his voice rose the tiny hairs on your arm, your cunt now pulsating in an almost painful and steady beat, asking, no, begging to be used.

“i’ll do whatever it is you want me to,” you replied, voice shaky, heavy breathing.

with that, he faces you towards him. your back to the bed before he pushes you onto it softly with one finger.

he crawls on top of you. both thighs at your side, knees dug into the plush and satin bedding. “now i warn you, i have a slim frame but i am a bit sadistic. scratch that, extremely sadistic. is there anything you’re uncomfortable with?”

you thought about it for a moment. aside from your ex and that one, one-night stand, you haven’t been sexually involved with anyone else. you weren’t too sure about the entire bdsm world. you’re old enough to get the gist but you weren’t sure how far you could go, how much your body could take.

“hm, i don’t mind spit but i’m not sure about it in my mouth. i’m not a fan of the butt stuff and i think that’s it? we can try anything tonight, i’m willing.” you consent. he laughs at your eagerness, finding it cute. finding you adorable.

he then brings a hand up to your hair, stroking it gently. “once i take off these masks, if, by some off chance, you ever see me outside of these mansion walls, know that i don’t know you and you don’t know me. strictly pleasure okay?”

his words weren’t harsh but it still made you flinch. it’s fine, he was simply being direct. you’re both consenting adults for a fun night, no need to turn this into something more and complicate things. besides, seoul was huge. no way you’d see each other outside of here. slim to none chance.

“yeah i’m cool with that, strictly pleasure,” you repeat back, anxious as ever.

“you wanna have the honor or may i?” he asks, finger slung into the string of your mask, slowly teasing it off.

you give it a split second thought before reaching for his. “let’s do it at the same time.”

he laughs, amused at your suggestion. “ i don’t see why not.” he holds your mask as you hold his and you both take them off.

the mask comes off and it seems like someone just knocked the wind out of you. no fucking way.

absolutely no fucking way.

“what the hell.”

it was non other than your boss. yoon jeonghan.

you must have upset the universe somehow, your shakras aren’t aligned, SOMETHING, because there is no fucking way your boss you had to meet at work on monday was getting you dripping wet on a sunday.

he smirks, dropping your mask and letting out an amused laugh.

“now this, this is interesting.” but he doesn’t back up, instead he keeps on getting closer and backing you up onto what seems like a dozen pillows.

“i should’ve known something was off by that voice” you murmur, no longer maintaining eye contact yet still trapped beneath him.

“awh c’mon, i’m not that bad,” he says in a low and husky voice. he licks his lips slowly, almost in a circular motion while eyeing yours. he then brings a hand up to your neck, pulling you closer to his face before he lets go, hands at your sides again.

he drops his head onto your shoulder, into the crook of your neck before letting out another laugh.

“ahh, what should i do? i really want to fuck you right now.” he says this casually, as if it’s a random daily thought.

it makes you instinctively clench your throbbing pussy. his words weighing more now that you were out of the confines of your job.

jeonghan then backs away from you and sits at the end of the bed, he opens up a drawer at the table side and pulls out a case of joints. he brings one up to his lips before looking over at you.

“want one?” he offers, the joint going up and down as he speaks.

you hesitate, observing his face. were you really about to fuck your boss. should you? i mean this was the same guy who usually gave you hell on earth while at work.

he puts down the spare joint as if coming to a realization. “ah, i probably shouldn’t be offering my employee weed huh?” He’s about to put it back and away into case when you suddenly stop him. your hand grabbing his wrist.

“yeah, i want one.” if he was going to be casual about this, why couldn’t you?

“hm. okay. grab a lighter from the left nightstand. It’s in the top dresser.”

you nod and open the drawer, sure enough, there are a few lighters. you grab a random one and hold it up to him but you realize he had put away the case of joints and was staring at you curiously.

“where’s mine?” you ask, still holding up the lighter.

he shakes his head, a sly smirk on his face. he then comes closer to you once more, joint still in his mouth. he points it out so you can light it.

you flick it once, it buffers. the second time, a dim flame comes out of the lighter. as you’re sparking the joint, he’s not breaking eye contact. finally he drags in a puff, holding it for a second.

“so, what’ll it be? are you gonna give me the honor of fucking you tonight?” he asked while inhaling smoke, eyes glued on you.

you knew it was wrong. it’d be awkward at work and you hardly even like him. but you were already in too far and honestly it had been so long since you slept with someone. to say you were touch starved would be underwhelming.

“yes.” is all you simply respond, now staring back at him with the same intensity.

he studies you for a few more seconds before holding out his pinkie, “no strings?”

you look at it and intertwine your own with his, then connect your thumbs. “no strings.” you repeat.

with that, he pulls you in roughly, exhaling smoke into your mouth. your eyes get watery but you successfully hold back a cough. he turns the shotgun into a kiss, wrapping his cold hand around your throat and brushing his tongue against your bottom lip, asking for access.

as soon as your part your lips open, he glides his tongue against your own, taking it roughly yet passionately. soft groans leaving his mouth. He laid you down on the bed, not breaking the kiss and the harsh movements caused you to moan into his mouth.

his other hand finds itself at your waist, holding you firmly beneath him. fingers digging into your skin as if there was still too much space between you too. it didn’t seem possible but the kiss deepened as he fully put himself on you, his body pressing hard against yours. his hardening crotch rutting against your core, eager for some kind of friction, eager to make you feel good.

you bring down a hand, starting to palm him through his once smooth slacks and almost immediately he moans into your mouth, shuddering at your touch.

he pauses, pulling back from the kiss with haggard breathing, you chase after his mouth. already missing it’s warmth on yours.

he giggles, almost too cutely for such a vile scene. “aww, you like my mouth that much princess? i can do much more with it.

“let me serve you,” he says this almost desperately, hands roaming your body.

your back arches at his touch, your cunt leaking wetness unto the satin sheets underneath you. “please, i need your touch.” you say between anguished moans.

he cocks his head to the side. “such a needy girl huh?” he was enjoying the view of you pathetically rutting yourself against the satin sheets. your fist gripping onto them.

he gets up and takes off his tie, he then takes one more puff of his joint before tossing it back on the nightstand. you were still on the bed, your core wet and aching badly. you needed him to do something to you soon or you would practically go crazy.

he smirks, pleased with simply seeing you shift uncomfortably. you can tell he wanted you just as much. his hardening cock making a very apparent dent in his pants.

“strip,” he demands. his voice broke you out of the strange of looking at his crotch, you didn’t even realize you were still fully clothed.

you complied almost pathetically too fast. taking off your mini skirt and your sheer shirt. immediately, the cold air hit you. your nipples getting instantly hard at the feeling.

his eyes dropped to your body, a lustful gaze with something so much more. as if he would spend the rest of his life admiring your body if he could. “fuck, you’re beautiful.”

he watched almost in awe, gently patting your hair before roughly pulling you closer to his face. he started kissing you once more, tongue eagerly greeting yours as if he couldn’t go another second without your mouth.

it was a sloppy kiss, just needing to feel each other. mouths desperate and far too eager to worry about presentation. he pulls back again, a string of mixed saliva breaking off between you too.

you moan dissatisfied as he pulls away, looking up at him with confused doe eyes.

“lie down.” he ordered, the lustful glimmer returning to his eyes.

“yes boss.” is all you can pull together, it was small and measly but he heard it.

fuck. you were so used to saying it out of habit at work you didn’t even realize it slipped out until he had gone silent.

too scared to look at him, you kept your head down. ashamed you could’ve fucked up that bad. instead, you feel his cold hands lifting up your chin, forcing you to look at him.

“i like that.” is all he says before he nods to the bed, signaling you to continue lying down.

you obeyed him and he found himself at your sides again. taking his hand towards your warm and soft body. he dragged a delicate and icy finger along all your curves, minuscule and large. just needing to feel the touch of your skin beneath him.

he drags it back up, reaching your plump breast and he starts playing with the bud of your nipples, making you wince at the feeling, back arching at his touch.

“fuck that feels so—ngh shit.” you tried to string some words together but all you could do is whimper pathetically.

his dick was practically begging to get out of his boxers, hell, even just his pants. at every pretty moan, you let out, it twitched, your lewd noises already having control over it before you had even touched it.

“mhm what did i say about using our words princess? since you’re so bad at following instructions, i’ll have to punish you like the perfect slut you are for me, eh?”

you look up at him weakly, eyes beaming with anger. he already had you pathetically curling over at his simplest touches, how did he plan on punishing you even more?

“wrist or ankles?” he asked while pointing at the cuffs at the top and bottom of the bed. before even thinking it through you said wrist.

he then briefly got up to tie your left wrist to the left bed pole and your right wrist to the right one. the handcuffs were cold and firm, the type that you could only imagine cops used but it felt like a slightly different material. it felt safe.

he then took the keys and gently grazed them over your nipple bud, earning another breathless moan from you.

he shuddered at the sound of you. one part of him wanted to release a full load right into you but the other wanted to make this last as long as he could.

after all, how often was he going to have his back-talking employee with such lush lips, underneath him? mouth slack, pathetically begging to be touched by the boss you claimed to hate.

“p-please boss, ah fuck- c’mon, just ngnnh fuck me already” you yelp desperately, head was thrown back, no longer able to take the teasing while your cunt wanted to be rammed into harshly.

you could tell he liked seeing you like this. squirming in pain did nothing but make him smile.

“in due time my pretty, pretty princess.” he placed the cold small key on your stomach and then kneeled at the foot of the bed. he trailed both his hands up and down your thighs, your core throbbing harder by the second.

“how bad do you want my mouth?” he teased, kissing your thighs and going higher and higher until he reached your dripping core, it’s heat practically begging for him.

“so-ngn, so bad so so fucking bad please— fuck i can't take it anymore.” that set him off, blowing cool air onto your clit before pulling you towards him.

the action caused a tug on your handcuffs and wrist, causing you to cry out in pain but it quickly turned into pure bliss because not even half a second later the flat of his tongue was on your heated core.

it was like he was on death row and you were his final meal.

his soft and pink tongue delving deeper and deeper into you. even kissing your folds every once in a while. he then took a hand off your thigh and spat on two of his fingers before roughly inserting them into you, curling them slightly so they hit the g spot that made you a moaning mess all while giving you kitten licks on your clit.

the feeling of both his fingers sliding in and out of you at a rapid pace tied with his excruciatingly slow licks, even sucking on your clit harshly every time you moaned out an excruciating “boss.”

your stomach tied in knots, your heat clenching around his fingers that were now wet and covered with your fluid. it felt so good how he was ramming his fingers into you, the palm of his hand slapping onto your core and hitting your clit at a rapid speed.

you swore you could see actual stars.

he moaned into you pussy, barely able to contain himself. “fuck baby you’re making such a mess.”

his praise makes you jolt your hip forward, being met with his eager tongue, “mnnhmgmm it’s all because of you boss, hmhm i need you so fucking bad-d.” you dragged out.

jeonghan couldn’t help himself. using his other hand, he started palming himself through his slacks, desperate for some kind of relief, some kind of touch.

“mhm fuck just like that, keep talking to me baby.” he egged your own, getting drunk at the sound of your messy moans and the squelching sound your cunt made every time his fingers went into you.

you kept praising him, saying anything that came to mind so he wouldn’t stop. your words almost coming out as gibberish because his fingers alone were clouding your thoughts.

“ah-shit, boss just like that, please keep going,” you begged and he abided. he took out his finger and went to work with his mouth again, his tongue harsh and fast, licking your folds and going as deep inside you as he could.

you were so close to an orgasm. your vision getting blurry by all the tears brimming your eyes. he felt the tightness of your cunt around his tongue and fingers.

“tell me when you’re about to come okay baby?” he asked in a haggard voice, pre cum oozing for his tip already.

“ah mgh— y-yes boss im so close” you breathed out.

while he was eating you out, he took the hand he was fingering you with earlier and started rubbing your clit slowly; giving it small slaps that made you squirm around the bed, unable to move much because of the cuffs.

your stomach hit a specific knot and you knew for sure you were about to come undone within the next few seconds.

“i’m—fuck, about to come,” you whine out pathetically, your eyes closed, chasing the high towards the climax.

right as you reach your peak, he pulled away from you.

your eyes immediately snapped open, wide and frustrated that the knot in your stomach was left unsatisfied.

you looked at him, heavy breathing, hair stuck to your face due to sweat. he simply smiled and licked your wetness from his lips and fingers, not wasting a drop.

“why?” was all you managed to whine, practically on the verge of tears at the loss of contact.

he shrugged, a satisfied smirk on his face “the only time you get to come is when i’m fucking you raw princess, simple.”

your eyebrows knit up in confusion.

“so fuck me.”

his eyes went from playful to lustful in an instant at your words. in a swift motion, he undoes his belt and drops it onto the floor. with one hand, he unzips his pants, they hang loose a few inches, showing off his prada briefs. his curved length pulsating underneath.

he then gets back onto the bed, discarding his shirt and revealing a slim but toned body. his arms slightly flexed as he threw the shirt onto a nearby couch.

jeonghan then positions himself on his knees, hair falling unto his face. he looks back up at you, eyebrows knitted with a now unfamiliar expression. he seemed needier as opposed to the hungry mess earlier. “touch me.” is all he says in a low voice.

you crawl towards him yet you feel like a prey being stalked by a predator. you take a nail, trailing it up his thigh, earning a slight grunt from him. your finger stops right above his length, twitching in eagerness. its pink hue apparent from underneath the white briefs.

monday 12:58 am kst

you both fall back onto the bed, worn out and still coming down from the high after exhausting each other to your limits.

he looks at you as if to say something but stops himself. you wanted him to say something. make one of his borderline rude yet sly remarks but he is silent. the sound of both your heavy breathing starting to calm down in the still bedroom.

“uh, is there a bathroom in here?” you ask, refusing to make eye contact with the main that had just fucked your senseless.

he brings up a limp arm, hand pointing to a door by the right nightstand. you get up cautiously, wrapping one of the sheets around your body. you make your way to the door and go through. the bathroom was big and spotless as if it had been cleaned just recently.

outside you hear some faint movement. a dip in the bed followed by careful footsteps. you had a clue you knew what was happening but a part of you wished it wasn’t so.

you use the toilet, never losing your habit of peeing after having sex and then you get into the shower. needing to get the remnants of tonight off your body.

monday 1:47 am kst

you get out of the shower, feeling refreshed and squeaky clean. you use one of the clean guest towels to dry your body and wrap it around yourself.

you reach the bathroom handle, hand hesitant on the nob. unsure if you were ready to face the scene or potentially a person outside. in a swift motion, you open the door and exit the bathroom.

you look to your side unto the bed just to find it neatly made but with no one in it. no scattered clothes lying around, instead it seemed he took his and even folded yours, putting it in a bag on the nightstand with clean oversized clothes next to it.

you were relieved to not have to face your boss after fucking each other for what seemed like two hours but there was a pang in your heart at the fact that yoon jeonghan didn’t even bother at least mention he was leaving.

you dressed yourself in the new clothes and put on your mask once more. as you were finishing up, there was a knock at the door.

“boss?” you called out. no way, he had the code right? you walk towards the door, your belongings in hand and open it. sure enough, your best friend standing at the door.

“oh, it’s you,” you say casually, giving a faint smile.

“damn bitch can you be less excited pretty please? you’re overwhelming me.” she teased sarcastically. she was wearing a change of clothes too but she still had on her mask.

“you’re done right? your bunny boy told me you would be up here.”

you let out a dry laugh. so he could tell her but he couldn’t say anything as he was leaving? you know what, fuck that. you can be super casual too.

“yup!” you say popping the p, you exit the room and close the door behind you. your best friend takes your free hand and you both walk down the steps together.

you quietly dip out of the mansion through the front door, making your way to her car.

“can you drive? i had drunk earlier and i still feel kinda dizzy” she pouts.

“yeah, toss 'em,” you say about the keys and she does. you unlock the car and head in, making your way home as your best friend sleeps in the passenger seat, adamant about sleeping over at your house.

monday 4:50 pm kst

on her way home from work, your best friend picked you up and dropped you off at yours. you stopped in front of the bar. it’s large and luminescent name shining above, “purple rose.”

you felt queasy, nervous, nauseous, and anxious all at once. yet you also felt excited, a newfound secret to keep as yours. you entered through the front and made your way to the back, the employee room to clock in.

your fellow bartenders were gathered at the front. some sleeping on the table, others talking behind the bar.

“good morning guys!” you say in a more chirpy voice than usual.

no way you had become one of those people who finally get laid and suddenly you’re ms sunshine walking on a rainbow.

they noticed the slightly higher octave, raising an eyebrow but nevertheless, they said their fair share of greetings.

you start heading to the break room when one of the workers stops you. a slightly concerned look on her face.

“i wouldn’t go in there if i were you, boss is in a bad mood,” she whispered the last part, clicking her tongue.

what the hell could’ve happened in the last 12 hours since you had sex that had the whole bar walking on eggshells?

you smile at her warning but disregard it. not to see him, you say to yourself, but because you needed to clock in any way.

you open the door and are immediately met with a pacing jeonghan. he looked disheveled, handsome, but still disheveled. as if he didn’t get a wink of sleep.

he sees you by the door and motions you in.

“what took you so long?”

what was he talking about? you looked at the clock and you were exactly on time.

“i’m here on time, what do you mean?” you asked while setting down your stuff.

the atmosphere was tense as if you had truly done something wrong. jeonghan pauses in his tracks and starts walking towards you. he was unreadable, you couldn’t tell what he was feeling at all.

“being on time is being late,” he answers, eyebrows furrowed, breathing haggard. he was a couple of inches away from you, far more than what was appropriate at work. his eyes fell to your lips before begrudgingly looking back up.

“so, what do you have to say for yourself?” he ask, almost in pain.

you were truly lost. was he seriously mad because of the time? he pulls you out of your thoughts, hand slamming on the desk behind you.

“i asked what you have to say for yourself.”

now you were seriously annoyed, what the hell was his problem? you answer, tone curt and firm. no longer wanting to indulge in this conversation or his presence.

“my apologies boss, it won’t happen again.” you spat out, tone laced with venom. you said it formally, not missing any honorifics and he caught this. gaze going cold before breaking out a smile.

he hung his head low, muttering a curse before looking back up at you. the night you spent together, the line that was crossed, almost as though it never even happened.

a mere figment of your imagination. ha, if only.

“it won’t happen again? we’ll see about that. come back out immediately after clocking in, you have front duty again today.”

and with that, yoon jeonghan, no, your boss left the break room.

leaving you in a complete state of confusion.

[wooahaes]

under the sun [joshua]

pairing: non-idol!joshua x gn!reader

prompt: darl+ing inspired fic.

word count: 11.4k~

warnings: slightly suggestive at the very very end, but its left up to interpretation whether anything happens!! (its just two idiots in love making out for a minute). so, so much skinship and platonic-ish kisses between joshua and reader throughout. depictions of nightmares + mentions of vague illness and injuries within said nightmares. food mentions. more straight forward, flirty joshua throughout fic. mentions of joshua being mr gentle sexy.

daisy’s notes: men i am down bad for after writing this........ also sorry to anyone who asked to be tagged but wasn’t: several names didn’t pop up when i tried to @ them !! (plus tumblr for some reason hates when i try to have a taglist so if it DOES show that u were @-ed but didnt receive a notif, im so sorry!! ive had this issue for a while and i have no idea how to fix it...)

< day 3 || masterlist ||

summary: It all starts when you wake up in a field without a name or any memories to define yourself with. Thirteen men take you in as one of their own, and slowly you begin to wonder what is going on within this world… and between you and one of them.      

It wouldn’t be wrong to say that Joshua already had a soft spot for you.

This, however, was normal in his eyes. Every time a new person came from maybe either Soonyoung or Wonwoo onward, Joshua found himself doting on people a little extra. When Jun came, it simply felt like they were a tiny group of people living together. But something about that number ticking over from four to five or five to six felt... More, in a way. Although he didn’t dote heavily on Soonyoung, or Wonwoo for that matter, his affections were obvious from day one. The amusement he found in Soonyoung’s jokes, the gentle way Joshua made sure to keep Wonwoo (and later Jihoon, Minghao, and occasionally Hansol when he wasn’t feeling the chattiest) acknowledged in conversations (never forcing them to speak, but making sure they felt regarded as a member of the group), his friendly competitions with the others... He found ways to make sure people felt involved. Jeonghan was better at listening and giving advice, Seungcheol’s job was to lead, and therefore Joshua kept people feeling loved. Whether that be with casual conversation or the occasional mischievous prank he pulled. With you, he expected more of the same: he would dote on you in the beginning, and then it would fade into that same love and care he provided everyone with. Truthfully, Joshua enjoyed caring for people. There was a reason he was called gentle sexy, after all (... even if it was semi self-imposed).

And at the end of your first week living with them, Joshua saw how stressed you were becoming for one reason or another. So he decided he’d get to the root of the problem sooner rather than later. Once he finished hanging laundry with you and the others, he offered up a little picnic lunch--just the two of you. He’d packed up the sandwiches someone else (Mingyu, he thought) had made, and sliced fruit for you. All that was left was for the two of you to find a nice spot to sit in. He carried his bag with food and water bottles inside of you, while you had been tasked with the very important job of carrying the blanket he’d found for you.

He’d suggested the spot the two of you eventually settled into: half underneath the shade of the tree, and half underneath the sunshine. He spread out the blanket for two of you, gazing up at the cloudy sky above for a moment. He looked at you after a moment, gently patting the spot next to him. Yet when you sat down, he didn’t notice the way he slightly shifted to be closer to you without much thought. It felt... natural in a strange way.

“Like my second day,” you mused aloud at one point as Joshua was pulling the securely wrapped food from his bag. He looked up with a hum, but realized what you meant a second later: the two of you had lazed together under the sky that day, too.

His fingers grazed against your own for a moment, acutely aware of how the side of your hand pressed against his own that day. “It wasn’t that long ago,” he gently teased, a warm chuckle escaping his throat. “But you already fit in with us.” Just like we knew you would, he wanted to say, but he held back. Would that be a little too bold to say...?

“I do?”

He smiled. “You do,” he said, his hand already finding a home with your own, your fingers already lacing together with his. “I wouldn’t lie. I think we all care about you a lot, even if it’s in different ways.”

He could see the way you bit back a thought. Absentmindedly, your thumb brushed over his.

“Even Jihoon and Minghao,” he told you. He noticed the way you raised your eyes, already caught. And oh how cute your expression was. Maybe he’d catch you in silly little moments like these again if he could see that wide-eyed look again. “They’re just taking their time. They were like this with Seungkwan and Chan, too.”

It didn’t take you long to piece together the missing name there. “What about Hansol?”

Joshua’s eyes seemed to light up a little as he smiled. “Jihoon liked him almost immediately,” he said, “but he’s the exception. Jihoon likes you enough, and so does Minghao. They just take a little longer to warm up to people.”

“What about Jun?”

“Jun’s looking out for you, too,” Joshua said. “He’s also a little quieter about it. But... you know that Chan likes you. So do Hansol and Seungkwan...” His thumb ran along the side of your hand. “And so do I.”

He could see a flustered smile cross your lips, and you turned your face away from him, looking to the sky instead. But you finally spoke a tiny, “Thank you,” a second later. He laughed a little, warm and vibrant, at how adorable you truly were.

“So... What else is inside that cute head?” He smiled at you, tilting his head as though it’d allow him to peer inside and see said thoughts. “Anything new?”

Your smile slowly dropped, and you let out a quiet sigh. “Nothing so far.”

“Nothing wrong with that,” he said, gently squeezing your hand. “It takes time. I think once you stop worrying about it so much, it’ll come to you.”

With another sigh, you turned back to face him again. “I don’t know how you do it.”

“It’s easy after a while,” he said, pulling his hand free from your own. He reached for the sandwiches he’d brought the two of you, offering one up. Your fingers grazed his again when you accepted it, and he turned his attention to unwrapping it slowly. “When you’ve been here as long as some of us have... You learn to accept each day for what it is.” He went quiet, staring down at his meal. 

And you watched as proud, bright, warm Joshua turned into someone... quieter. Like the volume had been slowly turned down, number by number, until his melody could barely be heard while still being there. He said nothing for a moment, just staring blankly, brows drawing together as he gathered his thoughts.

“Sometimes... I pray,” he finally said. “And I think it helps. I grew up Catholic,” he looked back up at you, “That much I remember. I remember singing in church....” He went quiet again for a moment, idly pulling at a piece of the bread. “Singing’s really important to me, actually. Sometimes I don’t know why, but it is.”

You weren’t sure what to say to someone so pensive, so quiet compared to the version you knew most days. So you opted for what you knew was true: “You’re good at it.”

A smile crossed his face, even if it didn’t fully seem to be him again. “You’re sweet,” he said at first, eyes meeting yours after a second. This time, his smile actually met his eyes. “Thank you. But you should hear Seungkwan. And Seokmin, too,” he said, taking a bite of his sandwich, as if to distract himself from whatever thoughts had washed over him before. “Jeonghan and Jihoon are talented, too,” he said after swallowing his bite, “but you really, really need to hear how Seungkwan and Seokmin sound--especially if they sing together.”

That seemed to bring back the Joshua you were most familiar with. Not that you didn’t like this quieter, more thoughtful version of him: you thought that maybe, in time, you would learn how to speak to him in moments like that. It was strange, though... He always seemed so carefree so far, most days enjoying the freedom that this life could give him. It almost felt as though he was made for it. That wasn’t to say that you didn’t think Joshua could have those quieter moments: you were sure everyone there had them--even Soonyoung, who seemed to carry the most laughter with him, or Mingyu, who’s silly, goofy nature spoke for itself most days. Yet with Joshua... It felt as though you weren’t prepared to see that side of him peek out so soon.

It was cute, though, to see the way he happily hyped up the others and their talents. Soonyoung loved to dance--as did Jun, Minghao, and Chan, and Joshua was happy to sing the praises of everyone there. He’d let you see too much of himself, too soon. Maybe when the two of you were closer (and, truly, he hoped you would be), he would confide in you the way he confided in Jeonghan. He hoped you would feel the same safety in confiding in him, too: he might not be as warm as Jeonghan seemed to be, but he wanted to give you a warm place to land if you needed it, arms wide open and ready to embrace you when you needed it.

That night, he woke up from a far too vivid dream. The memory seemed to fade away soon, slipping from his grasp as he sat forward, a hand running through his hair. He’d been somewhere... crowded and loud, making his way through throngs of people. He remembered being approached, yet the face seemed... blurry and distant. Like he should remember it, but something in his mind refused to let him make out specific features.

“Joshua?” Jeonghan quietly mumbled from beside him, sleep laced into his voice. He stifled a yawn, reaching out to lay a hand on his arm. “Are you alright?”

He nodded, slowly settling back into bed as he turned onto his side. “Just had a weird dream,” he said. “Nothing bad. Don’t worry.”

Jeonghan accepted the answer easily enough, eyelids drooping shut as he snuggled back into the space next to him. He’d talk to him about it in the morning--no need to wake Jeonghan up over something so silly. He slipped back into slumber as easily as he had pulled his blanket back over him, and was left with nothing else he could remember that next morning. He made his way to breakfast with the others, stopping long enough to glance at himself in a mirror. He looked the same, so why did he feel so... Different?

He’d waved at you on his way in, and noticed your shy smile as you waved back before returning to your conversation with Seokmin. Joshua went to get a glass, his focus purely on getting a glass of water. Maybe that’d help settle him, centering him on something other than what he dreamed about last night. Seungcheol had stopped beside him, though, his own glass in hand.

“Everything okay?” He asked in a quiet voice. “I felt you jolt last night.”

“You did?” Joshua raised his eyes to meet Seungcheol’s. “Just had a weird dream. It felt... real.”

Seungcheol slowly nodded, taking in each word with care. “Like a memory?”

“I think so.” Joshua paused. Yet... The other memories never felt so vivid. Not like this. They felt real in the same sense, but what made this one feel so intense...?

He saw you again, giggling at something Seokmin had said, and he could see the way he pressed kisses into your cheek with a smile.

Well. There might be his why sitting right there. All that was left was to chase after it.

“Today, I’m going to teach you something very important.”

Joshua’s hand was holding yours as he walked alongside the river with you, more-so to guide you than his casual form of skinship. He’d invited you along with him for a small walk through nature--something he enjoyed doing on his own sometimes, but today wasn’t just leisure. He’d left you waiting in anticipation after he finally decided to break the news to you as to why he’d suddenly invited you out again barely a few days after your picnic.

“The art,” he said, with a purposeful pause to build suspense, “of living one day at a time.” He let go of your hand after a moment, slowing to a stop as he turned to you. “I think you could use it.”

He was slightly teasing you, and you could tell from the way he was smiling at you. Yet you agreed easily enough to ‘take these lessons,’ since he’d casually offered you a ‘once-in-a-lifetime deal’ when he invited you out earlier. If there was anything Joshua was good at, it was keeping you entertained. Whether that be through playing guitar or singing, or building up to moments like these... You definitely found him charming in plenty of ways.

“It’s hard,” he said, “but I learned a while back that it’s better to accept each day as they come. It helped me relax, at least--and it helped a few of the others, so I think I’m an expert now.”

Charming and cheeky. A deadly combination, in your humble opinion, but you liked Joshua’s company too much. If he would be the death of you, then c’est la vie... At least Chan would hopefully avenge you, maybe with Seungkwan and Hansol at his side.

(Not that you had any worries with Joshua: he was strong and safe in the same way the others were. The only fear you truly ever could have was of impending heartbreak, if you let yourself fall for his charms.)

Joshua drifted away from you, plucking a few flowers from the ground before he turned back to you. “There’s a lot of beauty in nature. I think I knew it before, but living here really makes you appreciate it a lot more.” He made his way over, carefully placing the flower behind your ear.

It was at this point that you realized he’d placed the other behind his own, and he smiled at the way the two of you matched now: little yellow flowers almost making it seem like the two of you were a pair. He turned, starting off talking about his own walks he goes on sometimes, enjoying the scenery even though he’s seen it an endless amount of times by now, and you followed behind him like a duckling.

Eventually, he found a spot to sit. He nodded toward the spot next to him, the corners of his lips slightly upturned as he watched you sink down into the spot next to him.

“What do you see?”

You raised a brow at him. What?

“Humor me,” he said. “Just tell me what you can see.”

So with a long exhale, you looked around, and began to list off things. The river ahead of you, stretching toward the lake at the end of this path. The trees that surrounded both of you, having reached the more wooded area. If you looked close enough, you could see fish underneath the water, scales shimmering in the sunlight that peeked through the trees. Tiny flowers dotting amongst the grass: some pink, some white... and others yellow, like the ones you and Joshua still had behind your ears.

Your eyes trailed him up. “I see you, too,” you said after a moment.

It earned a smile from him. “Well,” he said, “I see you as well. Now tell me what you can hear.”

Part of you wanted to roll your eyes. It felt like the kind of lesson you might have as a child learning about their senses for the first time, but you began to list off things nevertheless. The sound of water rushing past (and, if you listened closer, you could hear a fish leap and land in the water again), the sound of birds fluttering through the trees. Joshua’s breathing. The wind as it rustled leaves. Your own quiet breathing, too. Part of you wondered if you could hear the others, had you been close enough to home: the sound of Jun’s loud laughter, or Seungkwan ranting at something Soonyoung joked about...

And when he prompted you next, you continued on: you could smell the flowers, light and sweet on the breeze. Feel the way that the grass was poking into your skin, the feeling of the flower, weightless, behind your ear. The warm breeze as it kissed your skin. The warm feeling of his hand brushing against yours.

“That’s it,” he said in a low voice. “The art of living a day at a time.” He was smiling again, eyes twinkling. “Living in the present moment and accepting it as that. The book Wonwoo brought back called it mindfulness, but I prefer my name for it.”

You couldn’t help but smile back at him. Even if it was a mouthful... You thought you preferred his name for it, too.

The next day, you and Joshua were tasked with cooking dinner. Conversation always came easy with Joshua: even if you had moments of being unsure what to say, he could easily fill the air and keep things flowing as the two of you worked. He always seemed to use chores as a way of checking in with you, too, just to make sure you were adjusting well. He noticed how close you’d become with Seungkwan, Hansol, and Chan--although he’d noticed that a few others had a soft spot for you (namely Mingyu... and Seungcheol, but for the sake of his friendship, he’d leave his name out of it for now).

“Joshua?” You looked up from the veggies you’d been chopping for him, and he merely hummed in acknowledgement. “So... What started this whole ‘art of living one day at a time’ thing?”

He hummed to himself for a moment, mulling over the exact moment that led to it. He’d come up with the silly little name for it after he started practicing mindfulness, sure, but... “Sometimes,” he started, “I’ll get stuck in my own thoughts. It was maybe a few weeks before Jun showed up, but Cheol and Jeonghan took me out for a picnic. And--I dunno. We just sat together, just kinda observing how peaceful everything is.”

“So you had a picnic with your friends, and you started to appreciate... everything?” 

Joshua nodded, not looking up from his work. “Yep. It helped.”

“Would you do that with me?”

He paused, turning to see that you’d grown more flustered at asking your question aloud. Before you could apologize and try to backtrack, he merely nodded, “Sure. I’d gladly steal you away for a picnic if you don’t mention it to anyone else.” He went back to stirring the pot, the scent of spices heavy in the air. “I like having alone time with you.”

His heart stirred at his own words, aware of what he meant: I like being the object of your attention.

Right as he went to apologize for being so forward, you spoke up, “Then you can’t tell anyone, either.“

Joshua’s eyes were shimmering as he turned to you again, sharing a smile between the two of you as he realized that maybe things weren’t so one-sided for him. “Then... We can call it a date. If you want.”

“And if I do?”

Oh. Oh. This felt... fast. “Then you can pick our spot.”

Two days later, Joshua let you take the lead, a basket and blanket in his hands as you lead the way outside. The two of you had agreed to a little picnic lunch together, to reduce any risk of someone trying to tag along with you. Everyone would be scattered now, doing their own things as Joshua let you take the lead. He could hear the sound of Seungkwan and Chan bickering in the attic as he climbed up and into the church, and the tell-tale sound of Hansol’s warm laugh at an argument that was anything but serious. The two of you had passed Mingyu and Wonwoo on your way out, and he’d seen Seokmin go searching for Jihoon with Minghao tailing alongside him. Some of the others must still be out, finishing up their chores for the day. Joshua saw Jun on the way out, making his way back inside with an empty basket from doing laundry in his arms, and merely gave him a small wave.

You guided him out and to the same shady spot he sat with you on your second day. Together, you spread the blanket out before sitting together, chatting idly for a while..

“Joshua?” You suddenly said. “Tell me what you can see.”

His eyes crinkled a little with delight. Oh, how cute of you. He began to list things in a calm, even tone: the trees that grow thicker down the path to the lake, the river that ran near the two of you (and the shimmering of scales that are easier to see now, with the sunlight hitting them), the pebbles that were pressed into the dirt. He could hear the sound of your breathing, leaves rustling, the babbling brook... And he could feel the plush fabric underneath the two of you, the warm breeze as it kissed his skin in a way he wished would be replaced by something (someone, his mind corrected) else...

And even though the two of you had moved on from that sense, he smiled as he looked at you: “And I see you.”

Over two weeks of you being there, and Joshua felt as though he’d fallen for you too quickly. Too easily. Maybe in another life, this would have taken far longer. He would have courted you the right way, with dinner dates and long walks where he had to build up the courage to ask if he could hold your hand (out of respect for you rather than insecurity for himself: not all people enjoyed the kind of casual skinship that Joshua often saw Seungkwan partake in with...well... everyone). Maybe he should have asked you on the walk back how you felt, exactly...Yet his confidence had dwindled slightly. He felt something for you, yes, but how was he to be sure that it was love?

So he’d give himself a little longer instead. Enough time to know for sure that the enamored feelings he was almost certain of were what he thought they were. Every time a new person came, there was always this honeymoon period of adoration for them. For Joshua, it was the warmth of a need to welcome and care for a new person, and he knew himself well: it’d only last a week or two, three at the most, before it became something comfortable in his chest rather than an ever present flutter that punctuated his every action. Even if his gaze would drift down to your lips (a sign, in his eyes, that this was not the normal love he felt for new people)... He needed time to be sure.

Barely into your third week of living with them, Joshua woke up to the sound of you panicking.

He was far from the first person awake, though. You had curled up across the room, happy to be in Seokmin’s warm embrace since he was feeling particularly cuddly tonight, and you’d startled several of the others closer to you. He jerked up, running a hand through his hair to comb it back to his face as he watched you panic. The others had already taken to comforting you to no success. Seokmin kept an arm around you, trying to calm you down while your words were slammed together in this endless dribble, like water from a faucet coming out all in one heavy blast. Chan had reached out, trying to take your hand and wipe your tears as you kept trying to talk about the dream you’d had. Seungkwan spoke over you plenty, alongside Minghao, as they all tried to get you to slow down and breathe. You could talk afterward, yet you didn’t seem to listen. All Joshua could tell was that you had fought with Minghao in this dream, and then you ran away and ended up hurt, terrified no one was coming for you.

He kicked off the blanket, pulling himself free from the space between Seungcheol and Jeonghan with ease. Several others had woken up at this point, too, and he could hear Seungcheol mumbling something to Jeonghan as he was roused, too. Joshua, on the other hand, was more focused on getting over to you, falling to his knees in front of you.

“Hey,” he said softly, “it’s okay. It’s okay,” he reached for your hands, and, through your tear-filled gaze, your eyes met his own. “I’m here--”

All within seconds, you’d begun to move in for comfort, and he easily pulled you into his chest. Soon enough, he had sunk down to where he was sitting, letting you sob into his shirt as he stroked your back. His head leaned against your own, eyes fluttering shut as he focused on comforting you.

“It’s okay,” he said again in that low, soothing voice, “I’m right here. Just breathe for me, darling, okay?”

As if the words finally broke through to you, this time carrying some meaning to them, you gave him a shaky nod before squeezing your eyes shut tight. Your breathing staggered, and Joshua began to take in slow, deep breaths with you. Just to make sure you didn’t feel like you were alone now. He raised his head as you kept breathing, and he looked around at the sea of concerned faces that surrounded him now. Some of them were still half asleep (Mingyu and Hansol, Joshua noticed, and maybe Soonyoung, too), but they’d gathered around. They were a community, after all. This was far from the first time someone had a bad enough dream to evoke such a strong reaction (Joshua remembered plenty of incidents right offhand), and it created this understood feeling between them all: we check on each other, and we go from there. If you didn’t want to talk, they wouldn’t force you to.

You had realized that you disturbed everyone soon enough, and already began to apologize over and over, trying to make up a good enough reason to justify getting so upset over a bad dream. Joshua gently shushed you instead.

“It’s okay,” he repeated again. “You just had a bad dream. It happens to all of us.”

Which was enough to prompt Chan into bringing up how he woke up with a scream his first week there. He couldn’t remember what the dream was anymore, but it was bad enough that the others had to calm him down, too. He thought it was something to do with his life before, but Joshua remembered what it was. Chan had dreamed that he’d been kicked out of the group because he failed them in some way. Seokmin reached over, taking your hand in his, gently running his thumb across your knuckles as he shared his own story: he fought with Mingyu early into the latter’s first days with the group, and had a bad dream a while after of the fight getting worse.

They shared their pain with you without reluctance. They were human, too, after all: they had bad dreams and bad mornings, and sometimes they’d wake up crying like this too. Joshua just cradled you to his chest the entire time, though, tracing slow circles onto your back as you listened. Despite the stories being shared, you didn’t share your own now that you were calm enough that you could get it across better. No one pushed you to, though, past Wonwoo’s gentle question of whether you wanted to talk about it more. You had shook your head, curling up closer to Joshua before saying that you felt better now, thanks to all of them. They’d all started to go back to bed, Seungkwan telling you to wake him up if you needed to talk; he would happily listen if you needed him (or the two of you could go on a walk, too, if that’d help).

Joshua gently nudged you to get your attention. “What do you want now?” He asked softly. “You wanna go back to bed? I can get you some water if you want.”

You shook your head. “Can... Can I sleep with you, actually? You holding me helps...”

The surprise of your request made him grow a little flustered. He’d always be open to cuddling with you, but for you to say something like that...

He nodded, though, and brought you back over to where he’d been sleeping. Seungcheol wordlessly shifted over to make room for you, already grabbing extra pillows and blankets to help make you as comfortable as possible. Soon enough, you were curled up in Joshua’s arms again.

Over your head, Joshua had met Jeonghan’s gaze. His eyes flickered down to you for just a moment, and Joshua...

Well. He knew what Jeonghan was trying to ask. He merely nodded, and he watched as his friend nodded in return, understanding. A moment later, he’d seen the way you shivered slightly, and Jeonghan slid a little closer to ensure that you would be warm between the two of them.

Joshua loved you. Plain and simple. And now he was sure that both Jeonghan and Seungcheol knew (as well as every other person in that room). Everyone but you, hopefully. If he was going to tell you soon (and he would, he knew he would if he thought he had a chance), he wanted to do it right. But only when you were ready for that kind of relationship with him.

(And maybe he should call it overconfidence, but... Joshua had a pretty strong feeling that you loved him back.)

As much as Joshua didn’t want to leave you the next morning, it was Mingyu who gently nudged him awake, asking in a low voice if he’d come help with breakfast. He agreed, watching you sleep for a moment longer after Mingyu left him, and he slowly untangled himself from him. When you began to stir away, he gently shushed you, pressing a kiss to your forehead as he told you to go back to sleep for a little longer. You’d ended up turning over, reaching over for Seungcheol, who barely roused before he cuddled a little closer to give you further comfort. Joshua pulled himself from his blankets, watching the wordless way that Jeonghan filled the space he was leaving, eyes meeting his for a second in a silent go on, I’ve got them.

Mingyu was already working on breakfast when Joshua came in, his conversation with Seokmin coming to a halt. The two greeted him casually enough, and Joshua was put to work soon enough.

“Josh?” Seokmin said after a few minutes, earning a glance from him. “You and Mouse...”

Joshua said nothing at first, working on. Oh. It must be obvious now, then. Is this something he’ll have to address with everyone? “We’re only friends.”

“We know,” Mingyu said. “That’s not what we’re asking.”

You don’t need me to say it out loud, Joshua wanted to say. Because they knew: everyone had to, right? Last night was just... proof that the initial affection he held for you within your first days never went away. That it merely blossomed into something stronger. Barely a few weeks into you living with them, and you’d somehow captured his heart so easily. He didn’t want to call it all-out love, because love took longer to sow. Infatuation fit better. He, for the lack of a better word between “infatuation” and “love,” liked you.. a lot.

He waited until everyone, save for you, had filed in for breakfast. They were quiet, a few whispers about you flying around the table, and Joshua... Well. Joshua wasn’t an idiot: he saw the concerned glances people kept sending him. The way no one addressed him, but kept clearly talking about him.

And then he finally spoke up, “Don’t tell them.”

No one spoke. They merely exchanged looks, all knowing at this point.

“Not now,” Joshua said. “I’ll tell them when they’re ready.  I’m not putting that burden on them this soon.”

It was still tense, but Seungkwan was the one who finally looked up from his breakfast. “Joshua... I think they like you, too.”

He wanted to say something. Anything. His face grew warmer at someone actually speaking the thought aloud. He thought you did, too: but he didn’t want to define your feelings in his mind. It would set expectations on you that he wasn’t comfortable setting: if you liked him back, then he’d want to hear you say it out loud. Not now, of course, but when you were feeling better. He knew the effects of a shitty dream all too well.

Chan barely touched his food before he excused himself, saying something about taking a walk before he’d start on his share of the chores. Joshua saw the concerned look Hansol and Seungkwan shared, and the gentle nod toward where Chan had left that Seungcheol gave them: go on. The two excused themselves as well, getting up and following after him quickly.

Joshua wasn’t an idiot. He knew he wasn’t the only person who felt more for you. He knew Chan did. He thought Cheol did, too, but Joshua knew that neither would stand in your way of pursuing who you loved. Whether it be them or someone else, they would accept it and learn how to move past their feelings. Joshua would do the same, after all. He loved you and your happiness. And if you would be happier with someone else.. Then Joshua would support you wholeheartedly while he took the time to heal.

That’s what love was supposed to be, wasn’t it?

Something weighed in the pit of your stomach for most of that day. Everyone had been concerned at breakfast that morning (which, to be fair, hadn’t surprised you in the slightest), and you had waved them off. You weren’t ready to talk about your dream quite yet, not until you tried to focus on the center of it all. By some stroke of luck, you’d found Minghao painting by himself--sitting at a bare space of wall that’d only been painted green in preparation. He’d been painting a circle of blue, merely glancing up as you came closer before greeting you casually enough.

You slowly sank down next to him when he invited you to. “Um... Minghao?”

He heard the caution in your voice, and it made him lower his brush, turning to you. “Is something wrong?”

“Did... Did I do something?” You said slowly. “I mean. I don’t think I did, but--I had a dream that you were mad at me, and--and I just started overthinking and--”

“I’m not mad at you,” he said, plain and simple. For a moment, his gaze flickered past you, but before you could turn to see what he was looking at, he spoke up again. “If I was, you’d know. We’d talk about it eventually.”

Relief hit you all at once, and you let out a sigh. “Good...” You’d toyed with your sleeve, still feeling a slight nervous edge as you sat there with him. “I just... I had this dream where everyone seemed upset. But you--”

His gaze flickered up again, and then back to your face before he finally looked past you one final time. “Stop standing around and either sit with us or go.”

You turned, and Joshua had been lingering nearby. “Oh. Shua...”

“I can go--”

“No,” you said, “it’s okay. You can stay if you want. I don’t mind talking about it now.”

Joshua slowly nodded, making his way over before he sank down next to the two of you. He watched you for a moment, waiting to see if you would continue.

And soon enough, you did. “Anyway... I don’t know why everyone was upset, but you were the only one who spoke up and said whatever happened was my fault.”

Minghao furrowed his brow, looking up. “But you don’t know what happened?” When you shook your head, he continued. “I can’t say I wouldn’t be mad if something bad happened--”

“I ran away,” you said. “I don’t know why, but I just decided I’d leave for good since you all were better off before I came here.”

Joshua wasn’t sure what to say. He merely shared a concerned glance with Minghao, who, too, seemed to be at a loss for words.

“We love you,” was what Minghao said a second later, voice softer than before. “If something bad happened, we wouldn’t kick you out.”

“He’s right,” Joshua said. “We wouldn’t--”

“You didn’t,” you said. “I decided to just... Remove myself from the equation.”

That... was different, to be fair. But what could cause them all to be so upset that you felt that was the only option? To run away and live on your own instead? They were a community: no one should have to live a life of complete isolation. Seungcheol was always adamant about that after his own time alone.

“I know I wasn’t warm to you when you first came here,” Minghao said after a moment, “but I don’t want you to leave. You’re one of us now.”

With a slow nod, you let his words sink in. Us. Although you knew they’d all embraced you with open arms, letting you into this community, this family they had so lovingly come together to form... It still meant a lot to hear that you were a part of it. That they loved you.

Minghao looked back at the scene he’d been working on, pressing his lips together for a moment. “Do you have any ideas on what I should paint? I wanted to paint a pond, but...”

Joshua looked to you. “Mouse?”

“How about... ducks?” You suggested casually enough. “A little family of ducks.”

Minghao nodded after a moment, taking your suggestion into account before he began to wash his brush. “A family of ducks it is, then.”

You stood up, thanking Minghao for the talk as you went to leave him and Joshua behind. Yet Joshua rose quickly, following after you and stopping you once you were far enough to not be overheard by Minghao.

“Did you have any more bad dreams?”

You shook your head. “I didn’t. Thank you for being there, though. It felt like cuddling with you was all I needed.”

He chuckled. “Well,” he said, “all you have to do is wake me up and I’ll be there from now.“ He took your hands in his, swinging them slightly. “I always have room for you, alright?”

Your nose had crinkled when you smiled, giggling. “I’ll keep that in mind.” You slowly let go, taking a drifting step back. “Thank you, Joshua. I’ll keep it in mind.”

It was strange. Sure enough, you woke up that next night, sobbing again. It wasn’t as bad as the first time, but Chan had woken up Joshua for you when you asked him to. Instead of merely trying to soothe you back to sleep then and there, he glanced around before he gently pulled you to your feet, guiding you out of the room to make both of you a warm cup of tea. He sat next to you, watching the slow sips you’d take, cheeks still wet with tears. Despite the urge to go ahead and ask, to figure out what upset you this time, he let you have your space. The tea seemed to calm your nerves, and he merely waited for you to make the next move: if you wanted to go back to bed, he’d offer the spot next to you again. Or you could go back to Chan, who Joshua was sure was still lying awake, waiting to know if you were fine. When you finally lifted your head, meeting his gaze, you asked to talk about it.

This time, your nightmare was about Wonwoo. He’d fallen sick--really, really sick--in your nightmare. You swore you could still feel his feverish skin from when you were checking his temperature. It was almost as if he was going to die, and the thought of that had been enough to throw you out of your dreams and back into the reality you were living in. Wonwoo was okay: that was something you could see when you first woke up. Chan had stirred, asking what was wrong, and you merely asked him to get Joshua.

“If it helps... No one’s ever been that sick before,” Joshua said, his hand on top of yours. His thumb grazed the back of your hand. “And we know how to take care of each other. I’m sure Wonwoo would have been okay.”

Something about his presence seemed to calm you easier than the others did. He sat with you a little longer until your cups of tea were empty, and soon enough he’d made a space for you once more, letting you curl up in his arms again.

The same happened the next night: Mingyu had burned his hand in that dream. The next, you were lost in the forest with an injured ankle and you were scared no one would come for you. In another, your shoulder had been injured horribly... And all Joshua could do was be there for you each night. Sometimes he’d make you tea, or the two of you would go on a short walk to clear your head, but it always ended up the same: with you in Joshua’s arms, feeling safer than you had been before. He would wake up the next morning, feeling the weight of your body against his, sleeping peacefully.

(You finally gave up after that night and started sleeping next to him permanently until you worked out whatever was causing these nightmares. Not that he was complaining: he liked having you close to him.)

Seungcheol had been watching you one night after dinner, while the group was all still together, biting his bottom lip. Joshua wondered if he thought he could figure you out had he stared intensely enough, studying your entirety as much as he could from his place across the room. Yet his calling of “Mouse,” had been enough to catch your attention, followed by, “are your dreams still bothering you?”

You looked up from the puzzle you were working on with Minghao and Seokmin, a little more flustered at the outright question. “Not really...”

“Aren’t dreams a subconscious thing?” Hansol said from his spot on the couch, curled up with Jihoon next to him. “Maybe you’re just worried about something.”

“I’m not,” you said, a little too quickly in Joshua’s opinion. “I just had a string of bad dreams. It’s nothing serious.”

“Are you sure?” Seokmin frowned. “You can talk to us--”

“I’m fine,” you said, standing up. “I’m gonna go wash up for bed.”

They let you go without a fight. No need to push you now when you were already starting to get upset. Joshua merely said he’d go try to talk to you, just to make sure you were fine--even if you weren’t ready to talk. He’d found you brushing your teeth, and you’d pouted a little at the sight of him in the entryway.

“I don’t want to talk about it,” you said after spitting into the sink. “Maybe tomorrow, Shua.”

He slowly drifted closer to you. “That’s okay,” he said, slowly stopping next to you. “Do you know what’s bothering you, though?”

Reluctantly, you nodded after a moment. “I think I do. But... I don’t wanna think deeply about it before bed.”

He could understand that. “As long as you aren’t bottling it up,” he said. “We love you a lot.” He reached out to brush a stray hair back into place, and his fingers lingered at your temple for a moment before he drew his hand back. “I just want you to know that.”

“I love you guys, too,” you met his gaze. “Really, Joshua. I’m okay for tonight.” You leaned in, pressing a tiny kiss against his cheek. “Just tired from doing laundry with Soonyoung and Seungkwan earlier.”

He chuckled airily, a smile tugging at the corners of his mouth. “I understand. Just don’t be afraid to tell us things, alright?”

“I won’t.” You promised. “Goodnight, Joshua.”

With you heading to bed early, Joshua... knew what he needed to do. The group was starting to disperse when he returned, and he went ahead to stop Chan before he could go with the others.

“I was thinking about going for a walk,” he said. “Do you want to join  me?”

Chan shook his head. “I’m good, Shua. Thank you--”

“Chan,” he said, a little more serious this time. “I think you should.”

Chan looked toward the others, and let out a sigh, before nodding. He understood what this was, and the two of them grabbed their shoes and began to make their way outside. Once the church doors were securely closed behind them, Joshua let out a sigh and looked up to the stars overheard, twinkling in the clear, dark sky... and then he nodded out toward the river. He and Chan walked in silence at first, making their way down the hill with slow, heavy steps, neither sure how to begin this conversation.

“I really like them,” Joshua said outright. “And I know other people do, too. In the same way, I mean.”

Chan didn’t look at him at first. “I know. I was there when you asked us not to tell them how you feel.”

“I just want to clear the air,” Joshua said, “because I know you love them, too.”

Chan met his gaze, and Joshua could see something (confidence, perhaps) waver in his eyes. He opened his mouth to speak, only to close it, looking away. “We’re all adults here,” he said. “I’m not going to treat either of you differently.”

“I know that,” Joshua said. “I trust you. But I don’t want any bad blood between us... and I don’t want to hurt your friendship with Mouse, either.”

With a heavy sigh, Chan shut his eyes for a moment, slowing to a stop. “As long as they’re happy, then I’m happy. I love them, Joshua, and I want them to be happy.” He shoved his hands into his pockets, turning away again to kick at a pebble along the riverside. “I’d be happy no matter who they love. It’s not like they can date all of us.”

“Can’t they?” Joshua said, only slightly teasing. “You know how we are with each other. I think if we all wanted that, we’d work it out.”

Chan’s face grew bright red, even in the low light. “Don’t say things like that!” He said, pouting, “I--I don’t want to think about it when they only like you.”

“Sorry,” he chuckled. “I mean it, though. We’re all more than just a group of people living together, though. Who knows,” he shrugged, “maybe in another life, we’d all be something together.”

“Maybe.” Chan sounded wistful as he stared off into the distance. “But they love you.”

But they love me, Joshua repeated mentally, turning the phrase over in his mind over and over. You loved him... “I think they do--”

“I know they do.” Chan said. “It’s kind of obvious now.” He pulled his hands from his pockets, looking back to the church. The two began their return up the hill, faster this time to get back inside now that they’ve cleared the air. “Are you going to talk to Cheol, too?” He paused, “I mean... It’s obvious. Isn’t it?”

Joshua let out a warm chuckle as he pulled open the doors. It was a bit obvious that Seungcheol felt... a lot for you. “It is. I’m not sure I’ll talk to him, though.”

“Why?”

“You admitted to your feelings,” Joshua said, following Chan inside as he turned to secure the door. “Cheol is the kind of person who’d rather deny them either until his feelings are gone or until the world ends if it meant they’d be happy. He’s just going to give them up--”

“And I will.” Seungcheol stood up from his chair, making his way over. “Are you two really talking about me?” He chuckled a little at the startled expression on Chan’s face. “It’s fine, Chan. Hansol mentioned the two of you left, and I had an idea why.”

“So you decided to just wait in the dark to scare us?”

Seungcheol shrugged. “I thought it’d be funny. And it was,” he nodded toward Chan, “very funny to see his face--”

“But that’s not fair!” Chan suddenly cut in. “Cheol... It’s not fair that you have to give up your feelings.”

“Isn’t that what you’re doing?”

Chan stammered for a moment, “I--But--It’s not--” And then stopped, collecting himself. “It is, but... You give up a lot for us already.”

“They don’t love me,” Seungcheol said, plain and simple. A fact that he had long since accepted. “They love Joshua. We’re both giving up our feelings because we care about them and want to see them happy.”

Joshua felt his heart sink a little. While Joshua would have done the same for you... It felt awful to hear it said aloud, especially from someone who felt so much for you. “Cheol--”

“It’s silly,” he said. “How hard I fell and how fast it happened... But they love you, Joshua. And I know you love them, too.”

Joshua wasn’t sure what to say. “Cheol, I’m--”

“Take care of them.” Seungcheol tucked his hands into his pockets. “I know they’ll do the same.” He turned, musing aloud, “You know who to see about signing up to perform on their day...”

So Joshua nodded, already knowing what he needed to do. Chan walked ahead, following after Seungcheol. He needed to tell you soon, but... Surely, you could wait a little longer, couldn’t you? Just long enough for him to say it the way he felt he needed to. He made his way down, through the long passage until he came into the main room... Where Jihoon had been curled up, reading a book on the couch, humming to himself as he drummed his fingers against the edge. He wasn’t tired yet, but Joshua knew he wouldn’t go to his guitar until he couldn’t hold back anymore. He called out to Jihoon, already bringing up the song they’d been working on with Jeonghan and how he was going to try and finish it. He’d need help with getting it right, but...

Joshua knew how to make his feelings for you clear. Even if you couldn’t answer him in the moment, he’d sing it proudly, just so you knew where his heart fell.

Sometimes, all you had to do to find Joshua was follow the sound of a guitar being played. It always would lead you either to him or to Jihoon (or, rarely, Hansol), and once you came close enough, you’d be able to hear the soft way he mumbled his way through lyrics as he tried to figure them out. You peered around the entryway to the room he was in, watching the way he quietly worked on. He’d yet to notice you, and you watched the way his fingers moved to make each chord. Something about the way the sunlight flooded into the room and illuminated him made it feel as though you were looking in on a masterpiece. If only you could paint it--committing it to memory didn’t feel like it was enough to capture his beauty. Those soft brown locks fell into his face, eyes half-lidded as the lyrics he were working through (Should I talk to you or not? / I thought for a while...) barely audible. Was this, you wondered, what Eurydice felt when she looked upon Orpheus? Or how the stones felt when he traveled to bring her back, parting the way with ease, so moved by his song? Even if you couldn’t hear every word he sang, there was something so genuinely beautiful about how he seemed to lose himself in his music. It was similar to the way Jihoon did, too, as well as Hansol: they loved it so deeply, it was as though they were meant to sing in some way. Like music was one of their greatest loves, and it’d be cruel to abandon it completely.

Joshua looked up soon enough, though, and the music stopped as those pretty eyes softened when they saw you. “Hello, darling,” he called out, thoroughly amused that he had caught you observing him. It was just as love-filled as when he called you that during your second day there, too. “You can come in, if you want.”

As if bewitched to move from your place, you drifted across the room toward him, heart guiding you more than anything. Joshua always seemed to have room for you, no matter where he was: there was space by his side at dinner, at bedtime, or in conversations... and even now, when it was the two of you alone, he was happy to bring you in.

“Do you know how to play?” He asked, turning his attention to tuning his guitar--one of the chords must have been slightly off, since he’d kept trying to tune and retune it as he worked.

You shake your head. “Hansol offered to teach me once, actually,” you watched as he worked on, humming in acknowledgement.

“And?”

“I turned him down.”

Joshua lifted his head, this pretty, amused glimmer in his eyes. “You don’t want to spend time with Hansol?”

With a giggle, you gently bumped your shoulder into his. “Of course I do. I’d just... rather learn from someone else.”

He merely chuckled. “I see.”

Wordlessly, as he finally finished tuning the guitar, Joshua moved in closer to you so that he could reach around you. He brought in your hand to lay on the strings, the weight of it mostly on him still. His fingers are rough as they guide yours into place, and it made you wonder how long he’d been playing guitar.

“This is how you do Em...” His breath hit the back of your ear, and he paused to make sure you were pressing down the strings firmly enough. Then he strummed, and you could feel the vibrations through those strings. “Hear that?” He said, and when you looked at his face again, you could see this proud glimmer in his eyes. “And if you move your fingers to these chords,” he was already moving on, “you can get C...��

Joshua gently instructed you as he could. Em to C to G to D, always guiding your fingers and helping you keep them in place, and punctuating each with a strum to let you hear the difference.

“You’ll get better with time,” he said, “we’ll work on it.”

“So that means there’s a next time?”

He shifted away from you, returning to the position he’d been sitting in before you came. “If you want there to be one. I like spending time with you, you know.”

“Good.” You rested against his side. “I like spending time with you, too.”

He chuckled warmly. “I won’t tell Hansol you said that--”

When you whined his name, he merely laughed a little more, head tilting back as his eyes scrunched up with joy. Yet soon enough, he went back to what he was working on, no longer softly singing lyrics under his breath. He merely hummed along, trying to figure out the part he was working on.

“Y’know...” You began to toy with a stray strand of thread on your sleeve. “I talked to Cheol yesterday.”

“Mhm?”

For a moment, you weren’t sure how to bring it up. So you sucked in a quiet breath, before finally looking up to watch his face and try to gauge his reaction. “Joshua. What do you think love is like?”

He didn’t seem to hesitate. “I think it’s putting someone else’s needs before your own. Wanting to be close to them, too. Caring for them in a way that’s different than caring for other people.”

You opened your mouth to respond, but he continued to speak:

“It’s the way you make me feel,” he said outright, voice softer this time, as if someone would overhear if he said it any louder. He watched the way you went wide-eyed in response, clearly not expecting him to be so forward. “I was going to tell you differently. I mean, I still will, but--”

“You love me?”

He grew surprisingly sheepish, averting his gaze before giving you the tiniest nod. Strong, warm, outgoing Joshua had been reduced to a shy schoolboy because of one little question from you. “I think I do.”

His heart hammered in his chest, and he felt as though you could hear it from how silent the room had become.

“Oh.” It wasn’t flat. Or disappointed. It was warm, and a little confused, but he could hear the tiniest thread of joy laced into it. You gently bumped against his shoulder again. “Do you want to know how I feel?”

“I do,” he said, “but...” He met your eyes again. “Will you wait?”

... Wait? You’d thought that waiting was a little pointless when the fourteen of you were living this life together. What if things were over tomorrow? Why wait forever? Wasn’t that what Seungcheol told you, too? That you shouldn’t wait to confess to him? “Why?”

“I want to say it right,” he reached out, setting his hand over yours. “Okay? Let me sweep you off your feet.”

He didn’t expect you to laugh so warmly, so full of love at how cute he truly could be. “Okay,” you said, this teasing lift to your voice something he thought you’d gotten from hanging around him so much. “Then do it.”

Joshua set aside the guitar. He stood up, turning to you and offering his hand, and he nearly chuckled at your startled reaction.

“Wait, now?!”

“Nope,” he smiled. “You’ll just have to wait for what I have planned.” He nodded his head toward the doorway, “But I don’t want to give up alone time with you yet. Do you?”

You didn’t, either. With a smile, you accepted his hand, and happily let him lead the way. Although a few others had greeted the two of you, inviting you into a game, Joshua merely told them that the two of you had already decided to go for a walk together. Before someone could try to tag along, he’d already swept you away, happy to steal you all for himself for a bit. Not that he was the only one being greedy: you liked having Joshua all to yourself, too. The way he loosely intertwined his fingers with your own, just enough to keep your hands together but not enough to trap you with him, was sweet. Although when you tightened your grip a little, just to squeeze his hand, he wordlessly squeezed back.

And if he let go of you, just to sit in a shady spot under a tree, who were you to say no when he happily offered the empty space next to him to you?

(Even if it would later net the two of you teasing from Jeonghan when he eventually found you together, hours before dinner rolled around, comfortably sleeping hand in hand.)

Celebrations were always a highlight of having this group. Yes, there was plenty of manual labor that came first... But it would always be worth it to see someone light up, getting attention dedicated to them for a night. If he could see the way you smiled every night for the rest of his life, he’d be happy with that alone. Chan had held your hand as he brought you in, bright petals filling the air as they welcomed you into the group officially. Seungkwan had placed the flower crown upon your head, lips grazing your cheek for just a second--just as everyone else did. Joshua let his lips linger against your skin for an extra second, and found himself feeling a little greedy for doing so... and for wishing that he could steal you away again. He nodded along as Seungcheol eventually did his usual toast, and smiled at the sight of Chan with his arm around your shoulder, ever the dutiful best friend to you. It was clear that everyone there loved you. If nothing else, Joshua knew that you would be loved no matter what. And if his love for you faded into something akin to friendship, it’d still be love nonetheless.

Soonyoung, Seokmin, and Seungkwan had performed their little song and dance routine--and Joshua had beamed the entire time. Maybe it was because you eventually settled into the seat next to him, letting him drape an arm around the back of your chair and press his side against yours. He loved the sound of your laugh, so full of genuine love for the three as they performed. Jihoon performed a medley of his songs--some new, some old, but these medleys were normal for him. Even with broken leftovers of songs he could never find it in him to complete, Jihoon made a complete experience for everyone to enjoy. Even Hansol had a song to perform, incomplete yet so uniquely him. Jun’s monologue had been written by him, Minghao’s art piece unveiled in the same dramatic flair that he always did...

Joshua pressed a kiss right in front of your ear. “Wait for me,” he said, getting up, “This is for you.”

He watched the realization cross your face as he drifted away, getting a guitar as Jeonghan came to join him. He let Jeonghan introduce the song as he prepped the stage: it was something the two of them had worked on with Jihoon, yet only recently finished together. Soon, he was sitting on one stool with Jeonghan on the other, already playing. You recognized the song soon: it’d been the one he had practiced when he told you that he thought he loved you.

I’m falling for you / falling for you... / it’s too late to escape

(And Joshua, in that moment, was certain he never wanted to. Especially when he fell asleep next to you, smiling at your sleeping face and caressing the white rose that Jeonghan had painted onto your skin.)

The song had been part one. Part two began the next day, before most of the others were asleep. He’d departed from your side early--not early enough to beat the others, but early enough that you were still comfortable in your bed. He pressed a kiss to your forehead, already moving to make his plans. He’d be making dinner with Seokmin and Mingyu tonight, and that meant he could get everything ready without looking too obvious.

It would be hard to avoid you for most of the day, but the others were a welcome help. Jeonghan would point you to him when the time came, but Seungkwan, Hansol, and Chan had been tasked with distracting you for the rest of the day. That meant staying away from the garden once chores were over, and letting him take the time to make everything perfect. From the string lights that Seungkwan had found for him to the plush blanket he spread out onto the ground... He had to make this perfect.

Seungcheol had found him while he was working. “You’re telling them, right?”

He smiled. “Is it so wrong to make it romantic?”

“No,” he said, leaning against a tree. “Like I told you... Take care of them.”

“I will--”

Yet he had let out a loud, long sigh. “Seriously... They’ve been staring at you for the past few days. How can you not say something sooner? I think I’d break if they looked at me like that.”

Joshua felt the opposite, actually: Seungcheol was in love with the group. It’d take a miracle for him to tell you how he felt, and even then... He’d probably take a thousand years to do it, too. Not when it made him look as though he was playing favorites. Joshua wondered, for a moment, if that was why Seungcheol seemed so okay to give up his love for you. To let you be happy with someone else. He pushed the thought away: maybe, in another world, Seungcheol wouldn’t have to struggle with his feelings... It made Joshua feel guilty, for a moment. But he reminded himself what they both knew: you loved Joshua.

(In another world, if you loved everyone alongside him... Joshua thought he could live with that. He loved everyone else, too, after all.)

He returned inside to bring out the picnic dinner, dessert packed as well in the form of sliced fruit. Especially strawberries, which he had carefully cut the tops off of and sliced in half. It was a simple enough gesture, but one he hoped you would love.

And when you finally came to him, you laughed. “Seungkwan refused to let me leave him until Chan finally told me what was going on.”

Joshua had been sitting on the blanket, but he rose to his feet, hands outstretched for you. “Does that mean you wanted to see me?”

“Silly...” You placed your hands in his. “I’ve been dying to talk to you all day.” With ease, you slipped your fingers in-between his. “About the two of us.”

“Does that mean there is a ‘two of us?’”

He could see you grow flustered, averting your gaze for a moment as you pressed your lip together. “What do you want?”

Joshua began to lower himself down, bringing you with him to sit together. He let go just long enough to push things aside, scooting forward so that he could be closer to you. He gently took your hands in his again, squeezing them as he gathered his courage to say what he needed to say. He knew he felt something for you, that you felt something for him, and yet saying it out loud was scarier. It made it more real.

“I want us.” He ran his thumbs over your knuckles. “I want to love you while we have the chance. I’ve thought a lot about it, and... I don’t know what brought us here. I-I don’t know what brought you to me,” he squeezed your hands, “and I’m okay with whatever it is, no matter what it is. Because you’re here,” he reached forward, fingers curving around your cheek, “and I’m with you. And... And I think that’s where we’re supposed to be.”

“Joshua--”

“I love you.” His heart was racing as he said it. The words felt at home in his mouth. “And it’s okay if you can’t say it back. But... I think I’m yours if you want me to be--”

You’d lunged forward, kissing him hard and nearly sending him toppling back. His hands fly to steady you, and he shut his eyes as he kissed you back. You threaded a hand through his hair, the other cupping his cheek as you smiled into this kiss. Deep down, there was a tiny urge to just lean back. To let you take over and kiss him and... more, if you wanted it. He let his mind go blank for a moment, savoring how soft your lips felt against his own... And then he remembered.

“I,” he said as he gently pushed you back, smiling. His hair was a little messier now. “I made us dinner. And as much as I want to kiss you again...” He cupped your face, “I don’t want it going to waste.”

It earned a giggle from you, and you pecked him on the lips one quick, final time for now. “Right,” you said, leaning away. “We have time.”

That the two of you did. He’d already begun talking about how he’d been working on this earlier with the others, just to make something that would hopefully taste delicious. The others would be leaving you alone tonight, which was ideal. He wanted to be the sole object of your affections tonight and tomorrow and every day that came after, if you’d let him.

“Maybe that makes me selfish,” he said, drawing you in once more, “I can’t keep stealing you away forever, after all...”

Yet your lips slanted against his, and it made him feel free. Maybe he was never the one stealing you away. After all.. You’d stolen his heart within days of coming here. How could he steal you when he was always yours? He’d have to learn how to share you with the others again, the tiny need to keep you close to him building inside him. Just to link you to one another, like puzzle pieces that have fallen into place...

Truthfully, as long as you stood side by side with him in life... He would be happy no matter where you were. Alone or with the others, all he knew was that he wanted you with him until the end.

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