#if this gets interest here I'll keep posting chapters on tumblr

[origamiopossums]

Broken Machines - Chapter 1 - Destroy

"When I started this case, I thought I was gonna get some great insight into why you are the way you are. A look into a complex psyche. A glimpse into the neurological map of a mad man that could show some light on some bigger truths that could maybe help other sick people one day. As I got close and personal with you and your handiwork, I found a truth. It's a small one though. As unexciting as it may sound, some machines just come out of the factory broken. You're a broken machine." -Lloyd Lowery, Breakout Kings S1E3

A canon divergence story, exploring what might have happened if Theodore Bagwell had grown up with at least one person who cared, and the chaos and hope spurned from such a possibility.

A story about love and how nobody really starts broken. About how salvaging what is still good, no matter how little there may be of it left, is still worthwhile in the effort to build a better world.

Trigger warnings for this story: Prison Break, itself, canonically contains violence, blood, gore, mentions of rape - including CSA, incest, abuse, drug use, addiction, suicide, mental illness, unhealthy relationships, murder, homophobia, transphobia, racism, and ableism. These all 100% apply to this story. Beyond this, I'm using this story to explore some of these themes and how they affect these characters and their connections to one another in-depth. So please tread with caution if these things are too upsetting for you to handle.

This story is also on AO3.

Theodore Bagwell didn’t always hate his daddy. He certainty sought his approval at every opportunity. But, by the time he was ten years old, Theodore despised him down to his very core.

Theodore did exceptionally well in school. He had a deep love of books and the English language. Mr. Bagwell was constantly pushing him to study, telling him that he needed to make something of himself. Telling him that he needed to be something more than he or his mother had been. That he was their ticket to the good life.

Theodore got good grades, and he loved reading. But that didn’t mean that he loved school. In reality, he could barely tolerate it.

He was already considered an outcast by a very young age. He began to realize, at about age seven, that his classmates had started to section off into groups. And no matter how much he tried, he wasn’t welcome into any of them. The kids that once used to play baseball and run around with him without issue, suddenly recoiled at his very presence.

There were numerous reasons for this. But at the heart of it all sat his daddy. The community hated him - with good reason. He was dangerous and sick and unkempt. And keeping the other children away from him and his deranged offspring was top priority. The Bagwells could hurt them, influence them into wickedness. Being anywhere in the vicinity of Theodore’s family was an unsafe place for a child.

But Theodore was a child.

However, fate had smiled on Theodore Bagwell, if only a fractal of an amount in that lifetime of his. He had been afforded one solitary friend. His name was Zavier, and he made school almost bearable at times.

The kid was tough scrabble. Chaotic and scrappy, he didn’t tolerate bullies. He was in detention on a regular basis for threatening to clock anyone who so much as looked at Theodore wrong. Sometimes he even made good on those threats. However, Zavier being locked away in a classroom during recess meant that Theodore was more often a victim of various pummelings on the playground, most days.

Zavier called him by his full name. Theodore kind of liked that. His daddy called him ‘Teddy’. The other kids called him it, too. People who put their hands on him in ways that hurt. He didn’t hate the nickname, per say, but the way that Zavier said ‘Theodore’, in his excited, bright voice, made him feel seen. Safe. Special.

Zavier put his hands on Theodore in ways that didn’t hurt. Besides his mama, he was the only one who did. Light nudges, soft hand squeezes, accented by shy smiles and kind words.

Boys weren’t supposed to touch each other in ways that didn’t hurt. The grownups around him told him that all of the time. But if they were telling the same to Zavier, he didn’t seem to heed them one bit. Theodore hoped desperately that he never would.

His favorite way that Zavier touched him was when he would lean on his shoulder, as they sat in the grass together, huddled closely as Theodore would read to him. Theodore liked to read to Zavier. It seemed to soothe and calm the reckless boy. It was one of the few things he could do for him after all that Zavier risked for him on a daily basis.

Zavier had told him a few times, that he liked the sound of Theodore’s voice. Zavier seemed to like a lot of things about Theodore. He was the only one who did.

The other kids regularly made cruel comments about Theodore and his appearance. About Theodore’s clothes being too big, too cheap. They were hand-me-downs from his cousin, Jimmy. His family couldn’t afford new clothes every year like most of the others. And they made comments on his stature, scrawny and shorter than most of the other boys, not hitting the growth-spurt expected of boys his age quite yet. He was going to be a late bloomer. With his messy, brown hair and sunken in eyes, they’d tease him, tell him he looked like a ghoul.

And then there was the issue of his parents. The whole town knew who they were. What they were. There was a reason they were deemed as dangerous. A drunken father, a disabled mother, siblings to boot. Theodore was born of incestuous rape, and at only ten years old, he already fully knew what that meant.

Once, he had asked Zavier if he knew what it meant. The other boy had confirmed that he did. Theodore had asked Zavier what he thought about it. Zavier had told Theodore that he was just happy that Theodore had been born at all.

Theodore didn’t think that was a very normal thing for a boy to say to another. He hoped that Zavier never became normal.

Theodore’s daddy always smelled of cheap beer and sweat. He did odd jobs to make sure there was enough food in the house, but the majority of his money went to his beer and his old, beat-up truck. The damn thing could never manage to keep running for more than a few months. But his daddy couldn’t afford a new one, and he insisted it was vintage. So repairs it was.

The problems came when Mr. Bagwell repeatedly insisted on buying the parts and trying to fix the thing, himself. He was far from a stellar mechanic, and it just ended up costing them more in the end every time. However, his ego wouldn’t allow him to throw in the towel. He had to have some project of his own, besides his son, to brag about to his friends after all.

Theodore’s daddy loved to parade him in front of his friends, force him to read from his text books, answer questions. He wanted to prove to his friends that he wasn’t stupid. That he had produced an intelligent kid, and therefore must be intelligent, himself.

Mr. Bagwell’s friends came over about four times a week. That day, they had been pounding beer and a little bit of moonshine that one of them had brought over to the house. Theodore was fairly certain that he had never encountered any of them sober before.

“Seems equal stupid as the rest of you,” one of his daddy’s friends commented, as they got onto the topic Mr. Bagwell was always on about, his and Theodore’s intelligence. The man had been staring at Theodore as he said it, gripping a half-empty beer bottle in hand.

Theodore had been studying in the living room. He had wanted to mind his own business, but his daddy liked him where he could see him.

“Seems t’ run in the genes,” the man commented, nodding to Theodore’s mama, who had been sitting outside.

Theodore hated it when they talked about his mama. She might not have been able to do everything by herself, but she wasn’t stupid. She was his best parent by a landslide.

“Teddy!” Theodore’s heart caught in his throat with anxiety, as his daddy’s voice called to him, sharp and demanding.

Theodore turned his head. He hated his daddy’s friends so much. He hated the alcohol. He hated his daddy.

“Ten synonyms, pick a word,” Mr. Bagwell told one of his buddies. He had pronounced ‘synonyms’ wrong.

Mr. Bagwell’s friend chuckled, shaking his head.

“Pick a word!” Mr. Bagwell insisted, again.

The man thought for a moment before he spoke.

“Destroy.”

Theodore stood at attention, feeling highly uncomfortable with all of the eyes on him. He wasn’t a person to a single man in that room. He was a toy, meant to be displayed.

“Ten synonyms for destroy,” Theodore stated, saying the words just like his daddy had taught him to, like he was in some sort of trivia competition. “Annul.”

Annul, like he felt had been done to the worth of his life. Nobody cared about him. Nobody would save him. He had become comfortable with that fact already.

“Mutilate.”

Mutilate, like what his daddy had done to Theodore’s body dozens of times. Beating him, holding him down, doing things to him no human should ever put another through. He didn’t remember when it had started. But he recalled his earliest memories being drenched in pain.

“Liquidate.”

Liquidate, like what he wanted to do with the ever growing pit of fear inside of him. He wanted to be brave. But he was so small. He couldn’t take his revenge. Not yet.

“Abrogate.”

Abrogate, like what his daddy had done to his childhood, leaving his books and his own imagination to raise Theodore for him, lost in alcohol and the desire for prestige that he would never achieve.

“Quell.”

Quell, what he had to do with his never-ending rage, every time his daddy touched him, or one of the kids at school stepped up to him.

“Ravage.”

Ravage, what he wanted to do in moments like this, imagining what it might be like to lodge a knife directly into his daddy’s throat.

“Expunge.”

Expunge, what he wanted to do to his entire life. To run away somewhere safe, where he’d never be found and never return from.

“Demolish.”

Demolish, what he longed to do to the home he was standing in someday, holding so many evil acts and memories behind its walls.

“Extirpate.”

Extirpate, what he wanted to do to the lives of every person that ever tried to hurt him. The blood on his hands would mean less than nothing, if only he could get the torture to end.

“Extinguish.”

Extinguish, like what almost every person in that worthless town had done to any semblance of hope for a happy life Theodore could have ever had.

“Whoo! You see that? Stupid, my pail! My boy’s gonna be president!” Mr. Bagwell laughed, taking another swig of his drink.

Theodore didn’t want to be president. He wanted to be left alone.

It was exhausting, having something to prove. Being something to prove. He hated every minute of it. Hated every minute of what would come after, when his daddy was good and drunk. He knew, what would start as gentle praise and urging to do even better, would turn into something violent and wicked, only moments later. A hand on his knee would become hands taking off his clothes, would become hands pushing him into his mattress, would become an entire excruciating and terrifying experience that would leave Theodore sobbing and shaking. Maybe even vomiting. None of Theodore belonged to himself. Not his smarts, not his body.

Destroy. He wanted to destroy himself sometimes.

The kids at school certainly wanted him to. They had taken to following him around, shouting the typical insults, calling him a freak. But now they had started telling him to give suicide a try. He’d be lying if he said the thought hadn’t been more tempting lately.

He remembered how it felt, to have the wind knocked out of him by the most popular boy in his class. The way the dirt stung in his scrapes, as he slid on the ground. Without Zavier around, he could only manage to swing a few pathetic tries, before being knocked to the ground again. That time, the other boy held him down. He was so much bigger than Theodore. There was nothing that he could do.

The boy spit on him. That was another thing the kids had been doing a lot of. Mucus, slimy, warm, disgusting ran down his left cheek, as the boy continued to hold Theodore down.

“Hope y’ go home ‘n shoot y’r brains out, Teddy. World’ll be better off,” his classmate laughed, before standing.

Four other kids spit on him, too, as he lay on the dirt, heart pounding, terrified to move, lest they shove him back down. He thought about his daddy’s shotgun, mounted on the wall of his bedroom, above his bed. He didn’t know how to use it. He wanted to learn. Whether that was to turn it on himself or his peers, he wasn’t entirely sure.

Theodore was no snitch. He didn’t want to make more trouble for himself. But he didn’t know what to do. The other kids were getting more vicious by the week, and he had started to feel nauseous and clammy every morning, as he got dressed and packed for school. He had even tried to convince his daddy that he was too sick to go a time or two. But his daddy wasn’t buying it. Even if he had been sick, there was no way that Mr. Bagwell would allow his son to miss a day of learning, lest it ruin their bright future.

And, so, Theodore finally did what everyone said should be done in such a situation. He told an adult.

After school, he waited until the other kids had exited the class for the day, before approaching his teacher, Miss Cowell.

Miss Cowell was considered a fun teacher, a little quirky, with fiery red hair and soft brown eyes. She did pick favorites, though. She appreciated Theodore’s studiousness, but didn’t seem to find him all that interesting. If anything, she sometimes seemed frustrated with the amount of times he would raise his hand, eager to answer questions and show off his knowledge, the way that his daddy had taught him. Still, the community considered her to be kind. Theodore did, too, for the most part.

But, when he had outlined his troubles to her, told her why he had stayed late, told her what happened with the other kids that day, his teacher did not offer kindness or help.

“That sounds like you’re havin’ issues fittin’ in, Teddy. Nothin’ I can do about that. Maybe if you try harder, were a little more sociable you wouldn’t be havin’ this issue.”

He was taken aback by her response. He thought that, perhaps, he hadn’t explained himself articulately enough. He tried again.

“Teddy, you’re such a…sensitive boy. You need t’ learn how to roll with the punches, like the others. Need to suck it up.”

When he tried a third time, her voice turned sharp, any of the patience and kindness that was there before, dissipating.

“Suck. It. Up.”

Theodore closed his mouth, eyes immediately filling with the sting of tears. He nodded, turning as quickly as he could, out of the classroom, before she could see, and mock him further.

Theodore was at a loss. Nobody seemed to care what happened to him except for Zavier. And Zavier was always in detention. He just wanted the torture to stop and he wanted to be with his friend. So, Theodore did the only thing that he could think of.

Theodore stopped doing his homework.

The first few times it only earned him a wrap on the wrist from Miss Cowell’s ruler. But by the fifth, she was angry. Theodore started getting detention.

It was what he had wanted, time away from the school yard, and time beside his best friend. And the week he spent doing make-up work in silence beside Zavier had been one of the best of his life, as far as fourth grade was concerned.

However, when he got home that Friday evening, his daddy was just hanging up the phone. Miss Cowell had called, told him everything that had transpired over the recent weeks. Mr. Bagwell was livid.

Theodore knew that the punishment would be severe, but he had failed to gauge just how brutal his father was willing to become, once told by someone with authority that his son was becoming a failure.

He was too old for spanking, now. His father’s hands came down on his face, instead. Just slaps, at first. But it quickly became more, drawing blood from a split lip, bruises swelling across the bridge of his nose.

It didn’t take long, before his daddy had grabbed him by the back of his shirt, stretching out the fabric, as he dragged Theodore to his bedroom. There, he would choke and beat him, cussing up a storm, until Theodore could only lie still and take it.

Zavier cried when he saw the cuts and bruises, littered over Theodore’s face and arms. Theodore tried his best to assure him that it was okay – that he had deserved it for failing. But this only made his friend more upset.

He had never seen Zavier cry before. Boys weren’t supposed to cry. Not in front of other boys, anyway. It hurt to look at him when he cried. It made Theodore want to kiss him. Boys weren’t supposed to want to kiss other boys.

Theodore didn’t think that he was sad about what had happened. However, he sure as hell was angry about it. If Miss Cowell would have just taken him seriously when he told her what the other kids were doing, he wouldn’t have had to take such drastic measures to try and get away from them. He wouldn’t have had to spoil his education and piss off his daddy.

Most of the time, his anger was a silent anger. He’d take off to the nearby creeks or woods to play alone. Cause destruction silently. Kill any critters he came across if he could catch them. Not making a sound, even if they did, fascinated by the way their bodies would break underneath his touch or his small pocketknife blade. Thrilled to be able to control any semblance of life, as he couldn’t his own.

Most of the time, he kept his rage quiet. But that day, his anger roared.

His parents owned an antique oil lamp, once owned by their father. Theodore stole it, some matches, and a gallon of gasoline from the garage.

Then, he walked the three hours it took to get to get to his teacher’s home. The sun was setting by the time he arrived. His arms were sore.

The house was quaint and orderly, painted a pristine white. He wanted it to be as black as charcoal.

Theodore ducked low. He could see her, having dinner with someone, through the window of the house. They looked happy.

Doing his best to stay quiet and out of sight, he got to work. Making a ring of gasoline around the house, and on the siding, shaking extra over the pretty dogwood shrubs, planted right up against the house. Then, he stood back, lighting the oil lamp, before throwing it, as hard as he could, into the greenery.

The house immediately lit up like Christmas.

He liked the way the heat felt, as it spread, dangerously close to where he was standing, watching as the flames engulfed the home.

It didn’t take long, before he could hear a ruckus from behind the front door. A grin slid its way over his features. The people inside were afraid. He had done that. Their lives were in his hands, and it felt incredible.

Slowly, Theodore began to walk, just going down the road a bit to avoid being cooked. He wanted to watch.

In the distance, he heard choked screams and coughing. The panic in their voices reverberated in Theodore’s ears. He very much enjoyed the sound. He wasn’t sure if Miss Cowell had made it out. He hoped that she hadn’t.

Theodore watched, as the flames climbed and climbed, until they could lick the sky. The thick char of smoke billowed around him, shrouding him, a deadly coffin of his own creation.

It was beautiful.

[sibillascribbles08]

Big Ol' Rottmnt Fic Rec List

Hi, I've needed to do this for a while, so here's a big bundle of fic recs from me !

I've broken it down between one shots, chaptered fics, and series. I'll try to mention what the character focus is along with a brief summary and some personal thoughts. If you need more details I encourage you to check the fics summary and tags for yourself! I will only include an author's tumblr account if it's easy for me to find haha

One Shots

Mama's Boy - ashtreelane: Technically two chapters but it feels like a one shot. Casey Jr. angst, involving him finding out that maybe you can fix kraang infections and that he failed to save his mother. I love when people really pile the grief on Junior after all the fighting is over and the fic does it so well.

Forget-Me-Nots - GibbousLunation (AKA @klunkcat ): Hi, oh my god??? Leo and Mikey centric angst, in which saving Leo from the prison dimension has an insane ripple effect. Mikey dying? Nah he's going to start getting erased from every timeline and Leo slowly watches it happen (and refuses to do nothing about it). I utterly adore how this fic handles this concept. You see almost all of it from Leo's POV, noticing the little changes but writing them off as memory failures, because of how subtle some of it is.

Fight or Flight - pickledcarrotsandradish: Leo centric, post movie, Leo keeps waiting for his family to start lecturing him about all the dumb stuff he did during the invasion, and they aren't, so it's getting to him. A very neat narrative about how self loathing can warp our perception of how others see us. A++++

The Friend Zone Sounds Pretty Good, Actually - Cryptvokeeper: Eating this, eating this. You probably already know I love aroace Leo and this fic is an INCREDIBLE exploration of that. Even as just an ace person it hit SO many notes where I was just like "Oh god... I've been there buddy". And as a bonus the dynamic between Leo and Yuichi is v sweet. Love this a lot I've read it like five times.

Pink in The Night - unnamedmystery: Incredible April/Sunita fic. Like seriously this author wrote April's crush so well I think I was starting to fall in love with Sunita. Just incredibly cute all the way through, and great April writing, adore it.

《 until then, matriarch 》 - chiangyorange: HI OH MY GOD A nice chunky oneshot about Karai, about her being a leader, and it's phenomenal. It hits and hits and does not miss, really going in depth about her emotions involving her father turning into something wicked and having to destroy him, and how it ruins all of her good memories.

The Kindness of Collision - SpoonerizedSwiftness (AKA @splickedylit ): Hi I still remember the fic and the art suddenly showing up in the tag and then I was thinking about it for the next like five weeks aslkdjf A very interesting idea that when the turtles reach the age they were in the doomed timeline before things got reset, all the memories of their other life more or less hit them like a train. All of them have to comb through that information and it's a wonderful and emotional ride.

Chaptered Fics

Hamartia - Punable (in progress): Hi this is one of my all time favorite rise fics, mainly because in a way, it helped me come to terms with my chronic pain. It's Donnie centric and smack full of angst in all the best ways. Shorthand summary, an explosion in Donnie's lab almost takes him out (or kind of DOES take him out) and the recovery is not only long and agonizing, it may only go so far, and Donnie doesn't cope well with that.

Kick It Up a Notch - Brokenpitchpipe (completed): Hi this is my other all time fav rise fic. Donnie centric separated AU in which Donnie is raised by Draxum. My love for it stems a lot from the characterization of Donnie though, and even Draxum in this case. Not to mention that in a lot of cases it matches the vibes of the show. And in spite of all the humor, there's a few really gut wrenching moments. 10/10 will re-read.

Lightning in Our Fingertips Today - DaFlangsLairde (AKA @daflangstlairde-art) (completed): Leo and Donnie centric, mostly angst, with body swapping between the twins which results in Donnie finding out that Leo's ninpo hurts him. Love love love the character writing in this, and also how the swap is written.

Under Pressure - ParvumAutomaton (completed): Not sure this is a single character focused fic, but basically April goes cave diving and is out for a while, and the turtles get worried and go looking for her. This might be personal bias but as someone who gets really into caving stories, this fic hits the spot for so many reasons. A really great emotional ride, and if you wanna see April go through it then I super recommend it.

Nothing Haunts Us (like the things we don't say) - mad_and_thick_as_theives (completed): A lot of great fics by this author btw, but this one personally stood out to me. It starts of silly and light only to sweep in with the emotional weight. Turtles are all cursed with a truth spell, basically, but I think my favorite bit is who gets out of it first (and why). V sweet.

Creation of a Philospher's Stone - IgnisCanis (completed): Whoooo boy, if you want some Draxum centric character exploration this is a great one. It really fleshes him out as a morally grey character and also does a fantastic job at writing Mikey when he finds out.

The Ol Switcheroo - radishhqueen (AKA @radishhqueen) (completed): Haha not going to lie I have a few by this author (so I'll only tag them once) but MAN. Hands down my favorite take on future leo coming to the past, and maybe I'm biased because I like when those fics actually explore Junior's character in the process buuuuut I love it. Junior's already struggling to adapt himself to the present, and after getting caught up in a foot clan spell which summons his sensei to the present too it really doesn't get any easier.

Vigilantism for Fun and Profit - radishhqueen (completed): The Cassandra Jones fic ever. Zero contest. If you're uncertain about writing Cassandra because she had so little development in the show I encourage you to read this for inspiration (I know it inspired me a lot). It does such a great deep dive into her character post show and a bit of the movie too. Honestly anytime radishh has a Cassandra fic I am clicking.

Tried to Grow Up Good - Sroloc_Elbisivni (AKA @sroloc--elbisivni )(completed): The Casey Jr. fic ever. CRAZY in love with this post movie take on him. It's messy, it's fun, it's so so real and you get a good chunk of Casey Sr. in here too. Adore it.

Hold On (Or Three Times Donatello's Soft Shell Almost Killed Him, and One Time it Saved His Life) - dunk_on_em (AKA @spockazilla )(completed): If you ever want a bit of angst involving Donnie's shell this is my go to. Every chapter has an emotional swing, even the positive ones. And shows something most people might see as a disadvantage as a good thing, actually.

Atlas, My Brother - swampcryptid (AKA @the-name-is-rizzotherat)(in progress): Get your Raph angst, specifically involving him always shielding his siblings, this time via a curse. My guy is already going through it and I think it'll get worse if a solution isn't found.

I've Got You Under My Skin - Cass_Phoenix (in progress): More Raph angst, and some Donnie, a truly chilling exploration of the possible consequences to connecting with the kraang. This fic constantly has me on the edge of my seat, and constantly stressing for Raph.

What We Leave Behind (How We Start Anew) - iam57311 (AKA @iam-57311)(in progress): Any Baronjitsu fans here? An alternate take on canon in which Draxum and Splinter co-parent the kids since they're first born (made?) Hilariously while I love the Baronjitsu content in here, I think some of my favorite parts are actually with the sisters, Big Mama, and Draxum's sister who is so so cool I love her.

Proof of Redemption - iam57311 (complete): Another one of theirs! A short and sweet lil close to canon fic about Draxum steadily gaining the trust and affection of the Hamatos, with each chapter focused on a different character. I love how they're all paced out from each other, really hits how some are much slower than others to trust Draxum hehe.

No Crime* Only Brooches - OllieTheScribe (AKA @olliethescribe) (in progress): Well I have to get THE HypnoWarren fic in here. Such a fun take on these characters, I love love love the backstory they built up for Warren too, plus the dynamic between these two and the turtles after (eventually) become friends haha.

Minor Interference - bambiraptorx (AKA @bambiraptorx) (in progress): What can I say? This fic is delightful. Between the hilarity of the turtles going with Draxum just to mess with him, the lore additions for yokai and the Hidden City, HoH Donnie, and their slowly building dynamic, always eager for a new chapter with this one.

Series

A Butterfly with a Mechanical Wing - Amethyst_Goldenwind (AKA @amethystgoldenwind ): Donnie centric series about being a non-verbal autistic. I'm always fond of non-verbal/mute explorations of characters, and so far I really like how, because his family has grown up with it, all of it is very normal for them. The various forms of communication are delightful. Excited to see further entries.

Analogous Hues - alwerakoo (AKA @alwerakoo): It's a separated AU with similar titling themes as my own, needed to check it out. The titles are just about all they have in common though! This AU focuses a lot on the turtles (Raph and Leo with Splinter and Donnie and Mikey with Draxum). I love how this explores not only the dynamics of the two groups and how different they are, but also the dynamics between each of the siblings, also how some magic sibling connections can influence that. Not to mention the different home life in more ways than one. If you're into separated AUs that really dig into the turtles dynamics try this one out !

[pumpkinpaix]

Chapter Spotlight 8:

"'Censorship Made It Better': Anti-Fans and Purity Culture in English-Language Chen Qing Ling Fandom" by Abby Springman

Describe your topic/chapter in one sentence/one meme/140 characters.

Rejoice! MDZS has been cancelled!

What drew you to this topic?

When I got into CQL fandom and started lurking on its outskirts on Twitter, I started getting this weird sense of déjà vu. There was this bizarre similarity between the arguments I was seeing about the aspects of CQL/MDZS and their fandoms being "problematic" from a progressive, social justice point of view and the demands for censorship in American libraries that conservative groups were (and still are) making at an alarmingly increasing rate. In an attempt to make sense of this, I fell down what ended up being a really long rabbit hole, and, well, here we are.

Was there anything you were surprised to discover while researching?

I was surprised by the wide variety of fannish backgrounds found amongst members of English-language CQL fandom! I'm not used to seeing so many different "areas" of fandom intersect over a single piece of media like this. Some folks are primarily into the live action movies and TV shows side of things, some are mostly in bandom, some (like me) are traditionally a part of the anime, manga, and gaming contingent, etc. I think that's fascinating, honestly.

Did researching/writing your chapter change how you saw the text, the fandom, or the media? How so?

I didn't use the block button on Tumblr or Twitter for anyone in the fandom while I was working on my chapter. It definitely changed how I saw fandom on those platforms—literally. It really highlighted how much power social media algorithms have over what kind of content is presented to us front and center.

If there’s one thing you hope the fandom takes away from your article, what would it be?

I'll be thrilled if it makes people think about "problematic" content in less black-and-white terms. They don't have to necessarily agree with my conclusions! But if my words make even one person stop and think more about context before posting a reactionary comment, then that would be great.

If you were isekai-ed into MDZS/CQL, what sect affiliation would you choose and why?

The Lan. My existing skills are most likely to be applicable there (see: the library), it seems easy to find some peace and quiet when you need it, there are bunnies, and Hanguang-jun is there.

Chaotic one-sentence pitch to get your friends into MDZS/CQL?

My elevator pitch for CQL has historically been, "It's the adaptation of a book about a gay necromancer, except they can't actually show the gay romance or the zombies on screen."

What is one (1) book/media you would recommend to a MDZS/CQL fan? Tell us about it.

Strange Tales from a Chinese Studio by Pu Songling. It's probably the most accessible collection of Chinese stories of the supernatural available in English. If MDZS/CQL was your first exposure to traditional Chinese cultural beliefs about ghosts, exorcisms, and the like, this is a great introduction to the less xianxia-specific aspects. If that isn't the case for you, I still highly recommend it on its own merits!

Character you keep getting in those "which MDZS/CQL character are you" quizzes?

Wen Ning

Anything to say to potential readers of the collection?

Thank you, and I'm sorry—no, that's a joke. More seriously, I really am thankful for anyone interested in the collection. It's the product of years of hard work by many people, and I'm sure there's an interesting chapter in there for everyone.

(FAQ) (all posts on Catching Chen Qing Ling)

[captain-bubble-wrap]

Hello, babes. How was practice? I'm Maven, your tumblr hockey mom. Below you'll find a complete masterlist of imagines, series, and OC chapters and what you can expect from me and my writing style. A quick background, in case you're interested:

- I've been writing near twenty years, yes I'm an old cow, by tumblr's standards I'm sure. 

- I don't read fics, I just write them. 

- I'm a stickler for attention to details. I like to do research to make sure what I'm writing is legitimate and believable. I pride myself on realism. 

- I don't do hockey romance novel-type writings. If you want a realistic approach to a relationship (as best as I can envision) with Quinn (or any other hockey player I should write) then you've found the right girl. I won't write the reader as the Taylor Swift of the hockey world where she's in the limelight at every game she attends, caught on camera, noticed by fans, ect. For example, something like, "can it be the reader's birthday and Quinn calls attention to it on the Jumbotron during warm-ups?" I'll decline unrealistic plots like this, I'm sorry. Stuff that would never happen in real-life, I won't do. There are people on here who write like that, and that's fine if that's what you're into, but you won't get it from me. Simple as. 

- I don't write smut. Nothing against it, not being a prude. I just don't write it.  (stay tuned)

- I try to post a few times a week, to keep my inbox a manageable degree of cleaned out. I try to knock out requests from oldest to newest, but sometimes certain plots don't come to me as easily as others and I might skip one (for the time being) until something comes to me.

- Artistic license is used at my discretion but I try my best to keep your request as was...well, requested! 

- I try to give you guys a minimum of one-thousand words per imagine. Sometimes they're longer, but never shorter than 1k. It's just is a good number which allows me to post as many as I do while working two jobs everyday.

- I don't like writing my version of another author's original idea. General plots like a first date, a surprise birthday party, ect, is one thing because it's a very broad umbrella, but if someone approached me, telling me they read a story where the reader was Quinn's maid and he fell in love with her, and if I could write something similar, I would have to decline. It just feels too "stolen idea" for me and I don't want to step on toes. I understand no one can own or lay claim to an idea for a fanfiction, but still... person preference. 

- Apologies if this has come off very...strict. I just want to save myself time and not have to break anyone's heart because they didn't know what I was about, or what I wouldn't do. I'm easy to get along with, but I just know what I'm comfortable with and what I'm not interested in. Again, I'm not the only writer on this side of tumblr, but I appreciate all of those who have interacted with me and who have helped build this budding account. 

LINKS ARE WORKING! All my fics can be found under #💌Maven's Love Notes just in case they break again.

Pretty Boy Blues | You notice Quinn dealing with some troublesome skin issues, and you ask to help him. | No content warnings apply

Last Call | You're late getting home from a night out with the girls. Quinn's pacing waiting for you. Where could you be? | Implied alcohol consumption

Sleeping Beauty | Quinn learns of you having fainting spells while he's been away on the road. | Implied depression-induced eating disorders

Post-practice Cuddles | Quinn returns from practice in pain and needs your to help to get his mind off of it. | No content warnings apply

Take Your Pick | You let Quinn pick your outfit for the day. | Suggestive themes; implied sexual interactions

Baby me | Quinn refuses to take his medicine. | No content warnings apply

Plague-bringer | Quinn tests positive for Covid. | No content warnings apply

Leave Me Where I Lie | You get sick in the middle of the night and Quinn comes looking for you. | No content warnings apply

Princess on Board | Quinn and yourself go on a short road-trip and you're well prepared, crown included. | Implied daddy dom/brat aesthetic

Partners in Crime | Quinn insists on helping you make breakfast. | Mild bratty-reader aesthetic

Kitchen Kisses | Quinn and yourself stay in on New Year's Eve and welcome the new year alongside a batch of cookies. | No content warnings apply

Detour | Quinn has other plans before you fly out of Vancouver for the holidays. The ring box in his pocket might be why. | No content warnings apply

From Me: With Love | You finally get to give Quinn his custom gift for Christmas | No content warnings apply

When it Rains it Pours | Your day goes from bad to worse while trying to get the apartment ready for Quinn's return. | Mild reader bodily injury, mentions of blood

A Night In | Quinn picks you up for your birthday but takes you to his apartment instead of a restaurant. | No content warnings apply

Two Lines | Your cycle is late. Are you pregnant? | Anxiety themes

Tease Me | Quinn is week-to-week with his hand injury and is getting bored of not being on the ice. | Mild adult themes

Just Because | Quinn brings you a surprise to apologize for something out of his control. | No content warnings apply

Knock, Knock | You rush to Quinn's apartment following the high-sticking during the Lightning game. | Brief descriptions of bodily injury, blood, and mild adult themes

Cold Sheets | You're struggling with insomnia when Quinn comes looking for you in the middle of the night. | No content warning apply

Broken Glass | Your car gets totaled en route to Rogers Arena. | Graphic descriptions of bodily injury, emotional distress, and reader in pain

Broken Glass Pt 2 | Weeks after your car wreck, Quinn gives you one simple rule to follow. | 18+, dominate partner, emotional manipulation

Coupons | You go grocery shopping with Quinn before he leaves to go back on the road. | Separation anxiety, and mild depressive thoughts

Bang-bang, Kiss-kiss | You break off your relationship with Quinn. | Emotional distress, anxiety, heartbreak, and blame

Damaged Goods | You attend a home game and all hell breaks loose. | Depictions of bodily injury, and blood

Chapter I | A Chance Meeting

Episode 1 | Season opener: Flames v. Canucks

A Second Cup | You have an unfortunate run-in with Jeremy Swayman | No content warnings apply

[pirateunderapineapple]

Agathario Ao3 FanFic Recommendation Post

IT IS HERE, IT IS QUEER!

Okay so, I'm trying to gather all of the fics that i have either bookmarked ( so multichapters that i'm following ), and also i'll be going through my ao3 history (oh it's a dark place) to check for either completed works or oneshots etc. They will not be in order of how much I recommend them obv, just in random (except for a couple that you must read or i'll stab you). I haven't found the authors on tumblr but if anyone knows them feel free to tag them, I want all them to know how much i love them hehe This is how it's gonna go: I'll leave you the name of the fic and the author, their summary of the fic and maybe a personal comment, sounds good? Disclaimer: these are fics that i have read and enjoyed so i would like to recommend to other fans as well. If anyone has any other recommendations feel free to add them to the list, i think everyone will appreciate it, myself included! OKAY HERE WE GO

-MULTICHAPTER-

Unraveled by EchoesInTheMargins Summary: The thought of being with a woman had once seemed impossible to Agatha Harkness—a door locked tightly and never to be opened. After all, she was 48 years old, for Christ’s sake.

Then, without so much as a warning, Rio Vidal, a first-year associate, strode into her perfectly controlled life and blew Agatha’s closet door off its damn hinges.

PC: I mean, I trust that everyone knows this one by now and I don't even need to recommend it but just in case! THIS IS A MASTERPIECE! The epilogue was just posted and honestly I can't even describe how I feel about this fic. I would wake up for uni at 7 in the morning and the first thing I did was check if there was an update. How to not keep a secret by disaster_top Summary: Agatha liked to keep her work and personal life separate, which was why even a decade into working as a detective her coworkers had yet to know who she was married to. And unfortunately, her wife had no interest in keeping things that way.

PC: every chapter in this one is kinda like an oneshot, but same universe etc. I really, really love their freaky dynamic ( they're the definition of they much eachothers freak) in this one and I strongly reccommend it!

It’s Bloody and Raw (But I Swear it is Sweet) by Adimnos

Summary: “I don’t believe you. You prefer me—“

“Compliant?” Rio stood slowly, her eyes never leaving Agatha’s face. The action put her inches away, her body heat radiating out, searing Agatha’s skin. “Obedient?”

Agatha’s hips shifted against her will, her lips parting slightly. She closed her eyes against the heady mortification that razed through her chest. She felt Rio move closer and she parted her legs without thought.

Rio stepped between them but didn’t touch, hands settling on the desk inches from Agatha’s hips and hands.

“You always were such a brat.” Rio’s breath was hot against Agatha’s ear, her voice throaty and raw and filthy. “You never knew how to do what you were told.”

Or: After five years away, a still-grieving Agatha is dragged back into the FBI and the arms of her ex-wife. PC: this is art, it's just sto intense, so well written. pure, pure art. i'm thrilled whenever there's a new chapter

Sugar and Honey by visadero Summary: “No way,” Rio said, crossing her arms defensively. “Good for you, get that bag, but I’ll figure something else out.”

Jen’s laughter bubbled up, bright and teasing. “Sweetheart, you’re so sheltered. These women aren’t crusty old grandmas in rocking chairs. They’re powerful, rich, and they smell like Chanel, not mothballs. Some of them are absolutely stunning.” She tilted her head, studying Rio as if sizing her up for auction. “You’d clean up if you stopped being so stubborn. They’d eat you alive—and pay you for the privilege.”

OR: Struggling bartender Rio stumbles into a sugar baby situation with CEO Agatha Harkness. She can't figure out what the woman wants from her, or why she's letting herself go along with it. PC: I really loved this one and I have to add that this fic is actually part of a series, the second work being Honey and Wine , which is basically Agatha's POV i think (sugar and honey is Rio's POV). I haven't got around to reading the second work cause i wanted some time to have passed so as to not remember every detail of the fic. I think i'll be reading it in the next few days tho so can't wait!!

death's doorstep by villhag Summary: One day, Wanda’s spell fades, and Agatha Harkness is awake again.

Pissed off and powerless, she casts a spell to take her somewhere, anywhere but Westview—and it takes her to the last place she wants to be.

Death’s doorstep. -- Agatha and her ex-girlfriend, Death, have a very tumultuous sleepover in Hell. PC: the ending we deserved, thank you author

A Kingdom by the Night by visadero Summary: “You’re early,” Agatha managed, feigning a flicker of annoyance, though her pulse quickened. "I missed you.” The words were simple, almost soft. Her dark gaze held Agatha’s, steady and unyielding. "Agatha huffed, “Is that so?” She turned away, trying to mask the slight flush rising to her cheeks. "I’d think the Queen of Shadows wouldn’t be so sentimental.” The woman’s lips curved ever so slightly as she closed the distance between them. “Think what you want. But here you are." / or : Hadestown came on shuffle, thought about the Hades/Persephone Rio/Agatha parallels and things spiraled wildly out of control PC: this one had me reaaaaally invested

Something Wicked by motherconfessor Summary: While an apprentice witch, Agatha grows frustrated when she's not permitted to learn magic.

Until someone makes her an offer that she can't refuse PC: love, LOVE, LOVE

You'd have to stop the world by Echolux Summary: In the events leading up to Jen and Alice’s wedding, their respective best friends Agatha and Rio have to work together despite their… creative differences.

Oh, and then there’s this: Rio doesn’t fall for straight women. Agatha's not a lesbian. And one of them is lying. PC: This one was one of my recent discoveries and I wish I hadn't gone through it so fast. I appreciated so much the way this author approached the characters and their relationship, it was so pure.

The Ethics of Attraction by Sunshinesongbird Summary: Agatha Harkness prides herself on being a no-nonsense ethics professor, keeping students in line with sharp lectures and sharper looks. But when Rio Vidal—brilliant, sarcastic, and infuriatingly captivating—decides to test those boundaries, Agatha finds herself facing dilemmas that have nothing to do with her syllabus. As playful banter gives way to undeniable attraction, the two must navigate the fine line between rules and reckless abandon. In this classroom, the lessons go far beyond ethics.

THEY ARE BOTH CONSENTING ADULTS THIS IS A DOCTORATE PROGRAM NOT UNDERGRAD THANK YOU!

PC: hehe loving these dynamics

you'll just have to taste me (when she's kissin' you) by agatharioluvr Summary: "You alright, buddy?" She asked, and Nicholas stared up at her, star-struck. "Sorry about that." "It's alright, I caught it before it could hit me!"

Agatha stared at her in disbelief - seeing Rio right in front of her, a little sweaty and breathless; it was unbelievably attractive. Rio looked over at her, smiling that fucking smile of hers, before turning back to Nicholas.

"Well done, little man." She laughed and ruffled his hair a little as he smiled up at her. "I like the jersey - you keep the ball, we've got plenty more."

With that, Rio nodded a farewell to Nicholas and ran back onto the court, signalling for the assistant coach to grab a new ball to use. Nicholas held his new gift to his chest tightly, squealing with delight at the fact that he'd just talked to his favourite player of all time.

OR, Agatha's son idolises a certain star basketball player, Rio Vidal - and maybe she does too...

PC: I actually recently discovered this and read it all in one sitting. Honestly, I think i'm digging the athlete!rio fics a little too much!!

The Green Witch by MickeyJrWrites Summary: Agatha takes her kid to a market where he instantly becomes attached to the sweetest farmer, Rio Vidal. It's a romcom involving carrots and celery. PC: Just cuteness overload and rio calling nicky papito like IM DYING

honey come put your lips on mine (and shut me up) by tinyteamug Summary: “Do not,” Agatha said to herself from her spot in the media booth, “you absolutely do not need to defend your honor against-”

Rio dropped her gloves.

“God fucking damn it.”

The Sharks’ forward had barely gotten her own gloves off before Rio’s fist connected with her jaw. The crowd erupted.

“I am going to kill her,” Agatha announced to no one in particular, already mentally drafting press releases. “Should’ve kept managing curling teams. Nobody ever gets punched in curling.”

OR: Gently feral hockey star Rio and long-suffering publicist Agatha who definitely doesn’t get paid enough for this shit PC: Like i said, athlete!rio is my thing...

break me, shake me, devastate me by saturnreturn Summary: Rio, owner of Westview’s local floral shop “Wisterical,” finds herself with an early Christmas present when her hag of a landlord, Evanora Harkness, keels over. With the biggest pain in her side gone, she’s expecting a relatively stress-free life from here on out.

That is, until the daughter. PC: This doesn't have many chapters yet but i think it's really got great potential!!

hand in unlovable hand by villhag Summary: “You know, it’s kind of illegal to drink here. School property and all.”

It might as well have been the voice of God. The quip came from above; Agatha seeing her shoes before she saw the rest of her. White Nikes, splotched with dirt and grass. Ribbed socks pulled all the way up over gray sweatpants. A dark green sweatshirt. Salem Elementary Soccer embroidered on the front. All culminating with a tan neck, jet-black hair, and a very annoying—should she say condescending—smirk.

Someone had been stupid enough to encroach on Agatha Harkness’s domain. -- Agatha is a widely-despised soccer mom. Rio Vidal is Salem Elementary’s new coach.

Chaos ensues.

PC: same as the previous one honestly

Time Warp by 324b2fun Summary: When Agatha signs on to do a long-awaited sequel to one of her beloved movies, she thinks it'll be an easy check and a chance to reminisce on her youth. Little does she realize her past has come back to bite her in the ass, primarily in the form of one Rio Vidal. PC: I love this fic and especially the flashback chapters

Rage, Rage Against the Dying of the Light by motherconfessor Summary: “Lucky gal,” Agnes said. “The only way––” and she tried to say Ralph. That had been his name, hadn’t it? The idiot of a man whose house she’d taken over. Instead, what came out, tugged by the spell was, “Rio would remember our anniversary is if there was a beer named June 2nd.” - When Wanda's spellwork traps another person in its bindings, Agatha makes a deal that all she needs is seven days to get what she wants.

But seven days is a long time to be stuck in a PG-13 sitcom. PC: agathario in wandavision universe just hits different

-LESS CHAPTERS/ONESHOTS-

anything, and I mean ANYTHING from this author : 324b2fun THEY ARE DOING GOD'S WORK periodt also like, usually when i like a fic i go and check the author's other works so i recommend you do the same

creator, you destroy me by velvetprayer Summary: Time, suddenly, means the moments in between her. PC: there is no need for introductions here i think... this fic was what gotta us all through the finale and i don't even have words to express my gratitude to the author.

i bite my tongue, it's a bad habit by tinyteamug

Summary: In the week since the bonfire incident (which she was absolutely not thinking about), she’d run into Rio approximately seventeen times.

Not that she was counting.

There was Tuesday, when Agatha had taken Nicholas to his first surf lesson. Rio had been teaching the advanced class, wetsuit clinging to her like a second skin, and Agatha had absolutely not watched her demonstrate proper form on the beach.

(“Your coffee’s getting cold,” Wanda had said smugly.

“Shit.”

“And you’re drooling a little.”)

OR Agatha has a mid-life crisis and bails for LA. That’s what people did, right? Terrible breakup, mid-life crisis, pack up your sixteen-year-old kid and move to California. Completely reasonable sequence of events.

Then start sleeping with the hot surfing instructor, royally fuck up keeping it casual, and try your damndest not to fall in love. Less reasonable sequence of events. But whatever.

i looked to the children (i drank from the fountains) by seabiscuit Summary: “Wait, you haven’t even heard my pitch,” She can hear William’s footsteps quickening behind her, “She’s gay, too.”

Agatha turns sharply on her heel, “How could you possibly know that?”

“I asked.”

“You asked?” Agatha slaps a hand over her face, covering her eyes, “Oh my God, Teen, one of these days you’re going to get slapped in the face, and you’re going to deserve it.” * Or,Agatha’s teenage neighbor tries to play matchmaker with her and the hot funeral director who just moved in next door. It goes about as well as you’d expect.

better in the dark by seabiscuit Summary: “I don’t have sex.”

Agatha’s face screwed up somewhere between delight and incredulity, “You don’t ever?” She scoffed, “As in you’ve never at all? How long have you been here?”

“Since the inception of life itself.”

“And you’ve never fucked?” The way she said it, it did sound a little stupid, “What do you do to pass the time?”

“I scare children,” Death shifted in her chair, still rubbing at the skin of one hand with the other. No wonder Agatha had nowhere to live, she thought. She was unbearable. “Amongst other things.”

Or, Upon meeting Death, Agatha takes it upon herself to educate her on some of the finer points of being human. PC: This is pure, pure magic.

death and taxes (a series) by paddingtonfan69 Summary: They’re staring at each other over the now evenly stacked forms at the table. Agatha’s mask has fully slipped and Rio is fascinated by what’s underneath it, an unruly sort of anger, a sharp passion. Agatha looks like she wants to tear Rio from limb to limb. And Rio, god help her, would probably let her.

“Moving on to property taxes…”

“Jesus fucking Christ,” Agatha lets out. “Don’t you have a life?” — Rio is the best IRS agent in her field. Agatha refuses to pay her taxes. A love story for the ages.

PC: This story is so random but man I love it

when we kiss (i have anger issues) by lgbtimelord Summary: there’s no one agatha hates more than rio vidal

but there’s no one evanora hates more than the vidal family

so, when her mother forces her to go home for halloween, bringing rio as her pretend girlfriend is the best course of action to piss her off

PC: i remember enjoying this one

with your boots beneath my bed by dumblibramoon Summary: "Here,” Rio said, standing and shrugging off her flannel overshirt. Of course she was wearing layers. Of course.

“I'm fine,” Agatha said automatically, even as a cold shiver ran through her.

Rio just raised an eyebrow and held out the shirt. “You're dripping on my hay.”

“Your hay will survive.” But Agatha took the shirt, trying not to notice how warm it was.

Nicky desperately craved this dusty hellscape of a ranch for summer camp, and because Agatha's not about to leave her son alone with a bunch of horse people, she rents a cottage nearby. And here comes Rio, wearing an incredibly unserious pair of Wrangler jeans PC: just cute little lesbians

if i could take her down and run (then i'd call her) by dumblibramoon Summary: “You're late,” Agatha manages to quip, blood trickling from the corner of her mouth.

“A lady is never late,” Rio retorts, kneeling beside the fallen witch. Her eyes rake over Agatha's form, taking in the severity of the wound. “Looks like you've had quite the night, sweetheart.”

Agatha tries to laugh, but it comes out as a pained cough. “What can I say? I like to live dangerously.”

“Clearly,” Rio murmurs, her cool fingers brushing against Agatha's cheek. Agatha jolts quickly before listing back and slightly leaning into Rio’s hand. Goddamn, she was woozy.

Rio can sense when Agatha is anywhere near death (the physical kind). Featuring Agatha flirting with both her mortality and Death.

the way i feel about you baby can’t explain it by seabiscuit Summary: “She won’t even admit that she’s gay for a New York City Ballet dancer. You think she would go for you, Rio Vidal of Cobb, Oklahoma?” Jenn raises an eyebrow, “IT service provider who plays Elden Ring in her spare time.”

“Maybe.” Chirps Rio. Hope does, after all, spring eternal. * Or, Rio goes from IT service monkey to fucking her very beautiful, very poised boss in a very short period of time. And then, of course, there’s the aftermath. PC: ngl i don't remember much about this one but i remember liking it lol

She Gets The Job Done by visadero Summary: Cars don’t crash through fences for free,” Rio replied smoothly, shrugging. “But,” she continued, eyes glinting, “I’ll make you an offer. You cover just the cost of parts—let’s call it a grand—and I’ll throw in the labor for free.” Agatha frowned, knowing there had to be a catch. “And what exactly do you want in return?” Rio leaned back against the workbench, arms folded and expression deceptively casual. “Dinner with me.”

OR: Agatha is making her way cross country when she wrecks her car. There's only one shop in town ran by a deeply irritating and magnetic mechanic. She offers a discount on the work in exchange for dinner. Then she really puts in the body work (heyo). PC: this was a cute little piece

so maybe when you kiss me, i can let you see me cry  by rainbowinbeigeboots Summary: Agatha reluctantly has her first sleepover

PC: my babies i loved them so much in this

witchcraft filling your void (a series) by wariangle Summary: Pulling the sheet to her, Agatha gets up, draws a hand through her hair. “Get up,” she says, loudly.

The woman – Rio, if Agatha remembers correctly, Jesus fucking Christ – only mumbles something in response and turns over, away from the noise. On her back, right below her neck, the black tendrils of a tattoo spiral across her shoulder blades.

Agatha’s too fucking old for this. “Get up,” she repeats. She’s been teaching for over twenty years; she knows how to make her voice carry in a room. PC: this series has 4 works with 1-2 chapters each, i just put the summary to the first one. I enjoyed reading it and had some laughs with my baby rio

por eso by stick2theplan

Summary: In the seventies, Wanda decided Westview needed some queer representation. If Agnes hated her husband so much, maybe she’d prefer a wife.

(In which Ralph wasn’t real.)

PC: didn't know if i should add this in the multichapter or not since it is about 15000 words only but in any case, READ THIS

Underneath The Tree by Cthulhus_Curse Summary: Rio is back in her hometown after years of disappearance. Having always been seen as the black sheep for going three decades without meeting her soulmate, she finds herself awkwardly going through the motions of a rather disastrous family Christmas. But when a rather hasty brunette runs into her in town, Rio finds herself happy to spend as much time getting to know her before returning to the cruel reality of the holiday season. — Or Soulmate AU. Everyone has a journal that allows them to write back and forth with their soulmate, but need to leave it to fate to let them meet. ----------- OKAY SO, these were the ones i could find, god this list is long, maybe in the future there will be a part 2, who knows i hope i have been helpful to yall and you guys give these fics and authors the love that they deserve! seeya my babes<3

[turtletaubwrites]

Numbers Game ~ Chapter 32

Make Your Bets Now!

Pairings: Cross Guild Polycule x Shanks x Fem!Reader x ???

Numbers Game Masterlist

Word Count: 12.6k+ 😳😳

Ao3 Link

Ongoing Series Playlist: Youtube Music Link | Youtube Link

Chapter Tunes: A Forest ~ The Cure | Burn Your Village ~ Kiki Rockwell

Summary: The White Stag is chased through the woods. The hunters begin to show their true colors, while the prey just tries to survive. You might not be the only one running away.

Recap: The banquet is underway, and you were dressed as the White Stag. You met your nine suitors, some of whom came as a shock. You gave each hunter an arrow, a symbol of their right to claim you. Uncle Cedrick just gave you a ten minute head start.

Author's Note: Hi!!! Thank you so much for your patience while I've been dealing with all the things! I've still been writing, as you can tell by the word count! 😬 Lol, I did a poll way back when Shanks first arrived asking if y'all would prefer two regular size chapters with no smut in one, or one giant chapter with the smut. So here ya go, lol, you asked for it! 😅🤭

Content Warning: There's not much dark content to warn for this chapter (besides the usual Numbers Game shenanigans & Buggy's POV on the Dr. Vorsan visit), but I wanted to give a heads up that there is a flashback of the 14 year old reader having a crush on an adult. Nothing occurs, but there is some very mild creepiness that could be interpreted as inappropriate. I WILL NEVER write about minors in that way, so please know that this is just a teenage crush! In case you would like to skip that, I'll bracket it with these ~~~⚫~~~

Fic Updates & Questions:

I will be retroactively adding titles to all chapters. I prefer to have titles for every chapter of a fic, but decided not to add them when I thought this was going to be a one shot 🤦🏼‍♀️ (We're getting closer to the end, and outlining will be way easier if I can remember which chapter things happened in, lol.) I'm going with quotes/lines from the chapters for the title theme. Also, I only used "part" instead of "chapter" on tumblr for formatting space, but I always call them chapters so 🤷‍♀️

Since this is a reader insert fic (that I thought would be a one shot 😅), I've tried to keep as many personal details as vague as possible so that we can all hop onto that lovely, green couch. I'm not planning to state the reader's age within the fic, but as we get further into the story, some of you numbers girl's may be able to figure out the math based on the flashbacks and such. I have a whole ass timeline graphed out, so if anyone is interested in knowing the specific ages and dates of related OP canon and Numbers Game canon, I'd be down to make a separate post just for that.

Alternate POV Symbols:

🌲 ~ Reader | 🐊 ~ Crocodile | 🗡 ~ Mihawk | 🤡 ~ Buggy | 🔴 ~ Shanks | ⏰ ~ Flashbacks for listed POV | ⚫ ~ Scenes depicting Dark Content as listed in Author's Notes

!!! SPOILER WARNING !!! Fic currently contains spoilers for the end of the Wano arc. As we get further into Egghead Arc, there will be some spoilers (mainly from manga cover stories or SBS questions for minor characters' motivations, such as what the Vinsmoke's and Charlotte's have been up to since Wano, and why they'd want to marry our lovely heiress.)

Rating/Warnings: Author May Choose to Exclude some Warnings to Avoid Spoilers for Certain Chapters, Explicit Sexual Content, 18+ ONLY, MDNI, AFAB!Reader, She/Her Pronouns for Reader, Reader-Insert, Use of Y/N, Dark Content, Blood & Violence, PTSD, Panic Attacks, Dissociation, Mental Illness, Grief, Toxic Family, Swearing, Alcohol, Cigars, Smut, Fluff, Angst, Guilt, Drama, Jealousy, Manipulation, Pet Names, Power Imbalance, Cross Guild boys are VILLAINS, Pain Kink, Possessive Behavior, Teasing, Blowjobs, Threats, Relationship Drama, Anal, Doctors, Inappropriate Use of Akuma no Mi | Devil Fruit Powers, Shameless Shameless Smut, Uncle Cedrick Has Become His Own Warning, Other Additional Tags to Be Added

| masterlist | about me | rules | ao3 |

~~~🌲🌲🌲~~~

“I told you to run.”

Uncle Cedrick wet his lips after he hissed at you again, smirking while you transformed for him, and for his silent hunters and cheering guests. 

The white stag. The hunted. The prey. 

You’d never felt less human than you did right now, and the sense of danger in the air sent you racing toward the trees. 

It was disorienting to move in this fumbling body. Some foul magic must have stolen your hooves, your graceful limbs, your fur to fend off the cool breeze of the night. 

All you had left were your antlers, but they couldn’t help you flee. You escaped your heels, kicking free from the tight shoes as though they were traps meant to hold you still for the hunters to find. The dress made you panic, the weight of it wearing you down like trash left to suffocate creatures too helpless to free themselves from human garbage. You tried to lift the heavy skirts while you ran, but the train dragged behind you, catching on roots and branches as you fled. 

Logic started to break through the adrenaline in bits and pieces, but the forest had pulled you into a dream.

“This isn’t a dream,” you panted to yourself, slowing down to lean against a tree. 

That wild panic had left you with no idea how long you’d been running, but your heart was trying to escape from your body, and your lungs struggled to catch up as you let yourself stop. 

That should be enough drama for Uncle’s show. Why should I care who catches me first? I have to date all of them anyway. 

And the fear was back. 

Nine men were about to stalk you through the woods at night, and you’d just run deeper into the darkness, like a fucking idiot.

Though you doubted that staying closer to the courtyard would have made you any safer. All of those leeches were here to watch the show. They’d probably already placed bets on which hunter would get his greedy hands on you first.

Don’t cry. 

You almost did. Every time you thought you could accept your fate, Uncle Cedrick found ways to make it more torturous, more humiliating. 

Apathy tried to protect you, a welcome friend that lulled your emotions to sleep until you stared into nothing, your logical mind reciting your thoughts on a loop to distract from what you were putting away.

I already gave the leeches a good show. It doesn’t matter who catches me first. 

Useless rage replaced your apathy in a flash at the memory of the traitor touching your skin. Shanks was the last man you wanted to catch you, but Uncle’s threats felt like hidden traps, like suffocating trash, like this stupid dress that snagged on every branch. 

I won’t give them anything else to hurt me with. 

Crashes and yells entered the forest like a storm, and you were the white stag again.

You ran. 

~~~🌲🌲🌲~~~

~~~~~~

~~~🤡🤡🤡~~~

Shanks had only been gone for a day, but the clown found himself aching for him in a way he hadn’t in years. 

Letting Shanks back in had opened the door to all this shit he’d tried to stuff away, but he didn’t have room for all of these feelings right now. Not when his star was slurring her words, her voice high and distant while she tried to convince this fucking doctor that all their time together had meant nothing.

“It was all pretend. I was bored. I know it was risky behavior, I s-see that nn…”

“I’m glad you’re expressing that awareness, Y/N,” Dr. Vorsan’s voice bore down even through her frantic heartbeat, “but you still haven’t talked about the clown. It’s important that we understand our triggers so that we can prevent future episodes.”

She’s not breathing!

“You don’t want to have any more episodes, do you, Y/N?”

“No,” she agreed, though Buggy barely heard her over her now ragged breath. 

“Good. Part of staying well means cooperating with your treatment,” the slimeball purred. “Why did you go with the clown?”

“He was sweet. And funny... I liked him.”

Buggy looked to the ceiling, unknowable emotions pulling his face into a grimace. 

“You just told me that it was all pretend. That you were bored.”

“I, yes…”

“Clarity, Y/N,” the pompous creep scolded. “We can’t make changes if we don’t acknowledge our patterns. Why did you go with the clown?”

“Shut the fuck up,” Buggy growled.

The next words he heard had to be from her lips, but it sounded wrong, as though she’d been possessed by the concept of emptiness itself. His star was hollow. 

Gone. 

“I used him. I wanted to run. I’m selfish.”

No, baby, don’t say that.

The fucker didn’t say anything for too long. He couldn’t hear any rustling, only his empty star, breathing just enough to keep her alive. 

“Your family was very worried for you. That extreme, self destructive behavior—“

“I know,” Y/N snapped, then Buggy heard the sound of skin against skin, as though she’d slapped her hand over her mouth. “I’m s-s-sorry, doctor, I…”

“It’s quite, alright, Y/N,” the man fucking chuckled. “You’ve just experienced an episode that must have caused some additional trauma, but you’re safe now.”

Buggy hadn’t taken notes, and he looked down to find a shredded notepad on his lap, his shaky hands clenching into the paper. 

“Do you want to be safe?”

“Yes, doctor,” Y/N stated, the gravity of a black hole in her voice. 

“Was it safe to run away with pirates?”

What the fuck is he doing to her? 

“No.”

“Good. Now, tell me about the clown.”

Circles and circles of this talk spun through Buggy’s mind, and it seemed like nothing was said, yet he could hear his star break a little more with every word. 

“I’ll rip his tongue out, baby. Make him eat it for you. Don’t listen to him.”

“Excellent work today. Self reflection is difficult, but it’s the only way to heal.”

“Thank… Thank you, doctor.”

“There’s no need to thank me. You have the power to stay well all on your own, as long as you put in the work to take care of yourself. Just try to remember the kind of life you wish to have. You don’t want to lose yourself in another episode, do you, Y/N?”

“No, doctor.”

The clown laid in silence for hours while his broken lover did the same. Somehow Y/N built herself up again, preparing to head to dinner with her sister, and her voice was almost as clear as it had been before the session. 

She keeps all of this inside… I didn’t even—

“Come on, little clown. Don’t eat dinner on the floor again.”

~~~🤡🤡🤡~~~

~~~~~~

~~~🔴🔴🔴~~~

The Emperor of the Sea followed an usher to his seat, feeling high as he twirled the decorative arrow in his fingers. He was lucky to have made it in time, and luckier still that Y/N had looked at him like that. Shanks was sure that it wasn’t really lust in those magnetic eyes of hers. Buggy’s fallen star was difficult to read, but it had to be a message. An opening. 

I’ll get you out of here, Y/N. 

Even Benn’s smirking face couldn’t diminish the flames she’d warmed in him, his first mate pulling his seat out while he approached. The last few tables at the edge of the courtyard seemed filled with guests that were either late or large, the nearest competitor being the two story tall Prince Fukaboshi. 

Before Shanks could greet his rival, Sylvad’s voice carried through the night air, testing the Emperor’s ability to fake a smile. 

“Thank you all for joining our family as we celebrate the hunt for a new member! I am honored to help strengthen the Sylvad legacy by making sure that my enchanting niece finds the most loving, and of course, the most profitable match,” he admitted with a smug laugh. “Just as this marks the beginning of a new era for our family, I’m sure that most of you have sensed the shift in the waters.”

Cedrick paused for effect with Y/N posed like some pretty doll at his side while his guests murmured in agreement.

“For generations, the Sylvad’s have stood in enthusiastic support of the Marines. Although I still pay them an exorbitant amount to show up when I call, their many recent failures, and acts of overreaching, have shown them to be nothing more than expensive, and exceedingly annoying guard dogs.”

The laughter he drew was mixed, both nervous and pleased, and Shanks was sure he wasn’t the only one to catch the threat in those playful words. 

“The world is changing, and I intend to keep my family strong, even if we have to shoo the seagulls away,” he vowed with enough humor to keep the mood light. “But enough about all that, we’re here to enjoy ourselves. Let’s welcome in the New Era together with a good old fashioned hunt!”

Confusion was clouded by the applause Cedrick had demanded with his gestures and tone after he offered Y/N a hand. Watching that man touch her had Shanks’ jaw clenching, holding himself back while she truly looked like prey under his smirking grin.

“I think our white stag is feeling a bit skittish, but that's nothing a little chase can't fix. The first hunter to catch her claims the first date!”

Shanks watched in horror as Cedrick led his niece to the edge of the courtyard, speaking to her too softly to hear before she ran toward the trees, stumbling in that fucking costume he’d stuffed her into. 

Benn nudged his ankle, stopping Shanks from finishing his movement. Gryphon was on the ship anyway, and he wasn’t sure what use his sword would do other than to comfort his helpless soul.

I’m a villain now. Maybe I should just kill everyone here. 

He chugged the glass of wine in front of him, as though swallowing the liquor could help him swallow the layers of guilt that made no sense to him.

The bright light of that wounded star disappeared into the trees, but there was no reprieve. A large, white canvas was rolled out over the side of the manor walls while servants pushed a massive transponder snail on a wheeled cart up the path. The courtyard was silent until the snail’s eyes flickered, its mouth open as sounds of heavy breathing and snapping twigs came through before the live feed was projected. 

Two images appeared on that blank wall, bringing gasps and applause from the guests while Sylvad preened.

“In ten minutes,” he announced, doing a flourish as a timer popped up on the frantic screen, “the hunt for the white stag begins. The man that touches her first wins the hunt, and will earn the first private date tomorrow evening, as well as the pleasure of dining with the lovely doe tonight.”

The lovely doe in question was panting as she kicked off her heels, running barefoot through the woods. On the left was a jostled scene of darkness and trees, but as she looked down to lift her skirts, it was clear that a cam snail must be on her head, maybe hidden in those antlers. The second image continued to flip, showing her running and struggling through the brush from endless angles. 

Does he have a surveillance snail on every fucking tree on this island?

“What a strange courtship custom,” Prince Fukaboshi noted quietly, although his size let the words carry enough for Shanks to let out a sharp laugh, smiling up at the merman to cover his anger before Sylvad continued.

“You may woo my niece however you like, so long as it doesn’t cause her unsalvageable harm, or remove her from this island. I won’t have my vacation home turned into a war zone, so do watch your violence. I know that some of you have had disagreements in the past, but let’s keep the fighting to a minimum unless it’s part of a game, alright lads? We wouldn’t want to spoil the fun for everyone.”

Leeches…

Servants came around to all the tables to take bets from the guests while the courtyard followed the white stag’s every, panicked step. 

Hawk was right, this security is something else.

“This isn’t a dream.”

“Aww, isn’t she a darling,” a diamond-studded, older woman crooned, inspiring more guests to make noises about how precious she looked while she caught her breath, eyes blank as she leaned against a tree. 

“You’re gonna catch that little bunny, aren’t ya, Captain?”

Shanks let out a breath, finally breathing, when he met his first mate’s gaze. Benn was steady, the curve of his lips and shine of his eyes hiding the intensity from those that didn’t know him, but his captain recognized the look. 

It’s time to get serious.

~~~🔴🔴🔴~~~

~~~~~~

~~~🐊🤡🗡️~~~

Easy silence wrapped around the three men during dinner, interspersed with deep, hushed voices, and the scratching of Buggy’s pen while he doodled. He couldn’t help but feel thankful for the less noteworthy hours that had passed since his star had met with the doctor. 

“Zala checked in,” Crocodile reported between bites. “Guess she wasn’t suited to the restaurant business after all.”

“That’s Miss Doublefinger, yes?”

“Not anymore,” he sighed at Mihawk’s question. “Zala used to work well with Daz Bonez, and she’s investigating Dr. Vorsan. Refused to help without bringing Marianne along though… Ms. Goldenweek.”

“The child,” Mihawk questioned, giving a gentle tilt to his head. His lover seemed to get touchy when his old organization was brought up. 

“She’s eighteen now,” came the curt answer, although the larger man almost smiled at those damn, golden eyes. 

“Uncle ChodeTick’s talking to her, taking a walk,” Buggy reported, guilt cutting them off before they could get too flirty. The clown scribbled his notes, the easy silence less easy now. 

Mihawk’s lifetime of dedication to becoming the strongest did nothing for him now. All he could do was watch every subtle, pained expression on Buggy’s face while he suffered, the bravest of them all. 

“The agents are infiltrating the asylum the doctor runs when he’s not fucking with our girl,” Crocodile shared, his voice hushed. 

“Sending a teenager to infiltrate an insane asylum? You are ruthless, aren’t you,” Mihawk flirted lightly. He was learning this man, and for the first time he wasn’t making excuses about why. His tone paid off, and he smirked at the playful look on that scarred face.

“Marianne‘ll be fine, I’m sure she’s looking forward to art therapy. Plus, Zala will— what’s wrong, Buggy?”

The clown gestured for silence while his face went red with rage, listening to the rules, and the threats that her monster of an uncle was caging his star with. 

“FUCK!!”

The nearly empty plates and glasses went flying as Buggy flipped the table, his body shaking in every direction, unable to sit with himself for another second.

“I’m pathetic! I can’t help her. I can’t fucking do ANYTHING!”

Crocodile and Mihawk caught as many pieces of him as they could, and wrapped themselves around Buggy until he breathed again, holding most of his body between them. 

“Don’t say that, Buggy.”

“Shh, little clown. You’ve done enough.”

“He’s gonna make her…” Buggy barely managed to choke out the sound, glad that the asshole had left her alone already. One more word from his lips would have made the him explode. 

Her words were worse though. 

“She said she’s gonna fuck the ones she…” He cried out between their now stiff bodies. “He threatened her with… She has to…”

“She has to do what, Buggy,” Crocodile asked, amazed at how steady his voice was while he knelt down to meet the clown’s tired eyes. He kept his hand stroking along his side, that body slumping instead of flying apart now. 

He couldn’t say it, exhaustion making the clown sway against Crocodile’s touch before he floated his hand toward the mess he’d made of the table. Mihawk caught the notepad, his eyes going apocalyptic as he read over Cedrick’s “rules” for the games.  

The swordsman wanted to fly into violence and rage, to turn to ice, and make everything in his path disappear. 

But Buggy’s eyes made him pause, the words on the page having too many consequences, too much weight. 

“Buggy, she said this in anger, did she not? I doubt she’ll really—“

“You didn’t hear him,” Buggy snapped, starting to float and pace while Crocodile read the notes. The clown snatched the notepad off the floor after the scarred man dropped it, his hand shaking with rage. 

“He’s twisted,” Buggy continued.

“He’s dead,” came a rough voice, the fury of a sandstorm barely contained in that vow. 

“Yes, he is,” Mihawk promised as he reached for Buggy. He pushed that lovely, blue hair behind the remaining ear, almost smiling at the ear plug he found. “We will get her out of there, but we need you sane. If our little rabbit needs to take care of herself, we’ll find a way to keep you—“

“What the fuck are you talking about?”

Buggy floated just out of reach, glaring down at the swordsman as though he’d started speaking some alien language. 

“You shouldn’t have to listen to that, little clown,” Crocodile soothed, resting his own rage when he realized what Mihawk was saying. “If it happens, we’ll make it loud over here so you can’t hear, or you could—“

“You want me to shove my fingers in my ears while her screams echo through the halls,” Buggy hissed. His anger was building up around him, heating the air, strangling any sense of peace from the room as those old words hit their mark. 

The two monsters under his glare froze, shame stunning them into silence. 

“You think I said I’d rather watch you fuck my star into oblivion just for FUN,” he seethed, his eyes going manic while he floated above them. “I’m a sick fuck, and ended up having flashy, old time, but that’s not why I had to watch.”

He was that frightening showman again, and they were drawn into his act. 

“I’m sorry, Bug—“

“I made myself watch while you took her from me,” he recalled in an almost sing-song voice that chilled the other men’s blood. “I watched and watched, because… I have to listen because…”

The crack in his own voice made him waver, dipping in the air a bit while he stared at the pained faces of these terrifying men. 

“What if they hurt her?”

Silence clashed with the cacophony inside their minds until Crocodile reached toward the clown again, gripping into his shoulder, and sending fear flashing through him while their faces grew closer. 

“We’ll kill them.”

“B-but–”

“Come on, brave, little clown,” Crocodile breathed over his trembling lips. “Why don’t you show me all your toys, huh? How many Buggy Balls would it take to blow up that whole fucking island if we need to?”

As they sighed, falling into the relief of distraction together, Mihawk sank against the wall, becoming nothing more than a threatening statue. He could have tried to grab onto the lifeline his lovers had just created, that comforting moment of camaraderie in violence while the clown indulged in and shared one of his favorite topics.

Yet, the swordsman couldn’t let it go. 

His little rabbit, forced to bed her captors again. 

She’s strong. She’s wicked. She’ll enjoy herself. Then we’ll get her back.

The fear that Y/N might enjoy herself enough to not want to return left Mihawk sick. He had to step outside, wandering down to the garden he’d barely thought of since she was no longer there to smell it on him. 

He found himself fisting into the dirt in that walled garden, huffing a laugh when he smelled the faint, sour scent on his fingers before wiping them on his pants. Red flashed in his mind, and the ex-Warlord sat in the dirt, wishing that love and trust were as simple to cultivate as the garden he’d been too preoccupied to plant. 

“I trust you,” Mihawk whispered to his red haired lover across the sea. The thought of how insufferable Shanks would be if he ever uttered those words in front of him brought a soft smile to his lips. “Please, bring her back. I need her by my side.”

~~~🐊🤡🗡️~~~

~~~~~~

~~~🌲🌲🌲~~~

Time was a human construct, and as your ungraceful body ran like the prey he had transformed you into, you couldn’t tell how long it took for the yells and crashes to race toward you. 

Eternity. 

One fucking second.

A clearing appeared before you, but as you stepped into the open space, an impossible man filled up your world. He knelt down, still towering over you, and all the sounds of chaos in the forest faded while his crimson eyes asked for permission.

Katakuri reached for you, his massive hand outstretched, but he didn’t grab you. 

There was no way you could describe the subtle shift in those stunning eyes when you lifted your hand to take his, but they went wide before you made contact, his hand shooting out impossibly fast behind you. The giant of a man wasn’t fast enough, and cold fear poured through you before you had a warm body wrapped around yours from behind.

“I’ve got you, bunny,” Shanks purred, breathing a little hard as he pressed his lips against your ear. His arm was wrapped around you, holding you tight, as though you were a prize the others would try to tear from his grip. 

You wished they would.

“If we were allowed to wear our raid suits we would have–”

“Don’t complain, brother,” a taunting voice floated through the trees while Shanks looked you over, never taking his hand off of you while he guided you through the trees. “We’ll have plenty more chances. Our little bride likes being hunted, remember? You heard what the old man said about the Cross–”

A strange noise left your throat when Shanks bent down to wrap his arm under your thighs, lifting you up over his shoulder before running too fucking fast. Running until you saw the lovely lanterns again, until the courtyard came into view.

Your own bedraggled image was spread across the outer wall of the manor, the huge snail showing two screens that flashed through replays of your pathetic race and capture. It showed a few highlights of the hunters, including Shanks smashing through what looked like a wall of giant crackers, and Iceburg crawling on the ground in the wrong direction. Now they displayed various angles of the winner carrying his prize.

Shanks was surreal. No one cheered for the slab of meat he’d claimed, not when the Emperor of the Sea looked like some dark god of the forest, a hero bringing home a feast to his starving people.

The image had you closing your eyes, playing into the exhaustion so you wouldn’t have to look at him anymore. 

“Red Haired Shanks, everyone,” Uncle announced as he slowed the audience’s applause, and you opened your eyes to find him beside you, leading your captor to the head table. “The emperor has earned the first private date tomorrow evening, as well as the seat of honor tonight. I hope everyone worked up an appetite.”

I’m not here.

Both men had their hands on you while they propped you up between them, and you faced the courtyard to find the ravenous guests practically drooling over the sight of your torn and dirty dress. Thankfully your back was to the screen, so you didn’t have to keep watching yourself stumbling through the dark. 

The stragglers made their way back, and your mind kept spacing, floating while your torturers chatted, until dinner arrived. 

Servants carried a long stretch of table over the stone path, “ooh’s” and “aah’s” making you more nauseated the closer it got, until they laid out the mythical beast before you. 

Your uncle had caught a white stag. 

He had caught it, killed it, and was laughing while its dead eyes stared at you, its useless antlers like some tragic centerpiece. Uncle Cedrick ordered its flesh to be passed to every plate, so that each of his friends might share in his auspicious meal. 

“Here’s to those with the heart of a hunter,” he toasted. “May your arrows always hit their mark.”

Every bite they took tore through your own skin, the slow prey gone still while the pack of wolves enjoyed their meal. An animal again, your mind was incapable of reason or words, but even the soul of the deer could feel this truth pulsing deep within the bones that the monsters hadn’t yet picked clean.

You would not survive this. They were going to devour you whole.

~~~

“Y/N? Sis? Are you okay?”

Some part of you that only existed for your sister reacted to the worry in her voice, blinking up at her while she carefully pulled the antlers off of your head. Another image of the deer’s mutilated body flashed through your mind as you watched her hold them to her chest before turning away, hurrying toward the door. You stared, thoughts thankfully leaving your mind while she threw the cursed antlers down the corridor.

“Are you okay,” she checked in again when she returned her gentle fingers to your hair.

“Yeah,” you cleared your throat, voice coming out raw. “Where is everyone?”

“I’ll get you cleaned up,” Kat assured. Her sharp eyes were wider than normal, but your urge to comfort her couldn’t break through your exhaustion, your delirium. “I didn’t think you’d want all the servants around.”

Gratitude swelled with the lump in your throat while Kat’s soft fingers transformed you, bringing you back to humanity. 

“I’m sorry he’s still such an asshole to you,” your sister breathed, starting to clean the scrapes that littered your legs and feet. “Running through the forest like… You’re getting married, not hunted. He didn’t need to make it so… I’m sorry.”

“Married,” you gave a tired laugh, closing your eyes before you went down the spiral. A hiss left your lips, your body jolting when she dabbed at a particularly unpleasant scrape.

“I’m going to call Dr. Gilli,” Kat announced, stopping you from digging your nails into your thighs. “No one else, and I’ll stay with you, okay?”

“No pills. No shots,” you ordered, too frantic to care about holding it in. 

“Of course not,” she sighed when your breathing started to calm. “I just don’t want to be responsible for your legs falling off from infection. Is that alright with you, sis?”

“Fine.” The slight teasing Kat had managed to put in her tone made your lips twitch, but that hint of relief took all of your energy. Your sister stayed with you, holding your hand while the family doctor looked you over.

Dr. Gilli had always been sweet to you, but the sight of your blood on her gloves while she gushed about how beautiful you looked, and how lucky you were to have such a romantic engagement, made you want to kick that sweet face in. 

“Thank you, doctor,” Kat frowned, shooing the woman out just in time before you punched her in the throat for asking you about babies. 

Kat helped you into bed, crawling in beside you like you were kids again. 

You used to be the big sister. Four years had always felt like such a big gap, especially with everything you had tried to protect her from. 

Until you couldn’t even protect yourself, and Kat had to become the big sister. 

Gratitude and guilt over that fact could never balance out, and as much as you loved her and needed her right now, you ached for her to leave so you could break down. 

Instead, slow tears stained your pillowcase while her comforting presence held you in a quiet cage. 

“It’s only a month,” she whispered while she stroked your hair. “We’re going to find the best husband for you, and then you’ll take over the company. I know it’s scary, but I believe in you, Y/N, just like dad did… I know you’re ready, and I’ll be right here with you.”

Kat’s misplaced trust froze you for what felt like hours, but somehow you fell asleep. Your name echoed through a storm while you watched the wolves tear into her flesh, helpless to keep your sister from the starving beasts.

~~~🌲🌲🌲~~~

~~~~~~

~~~🤡🤡🤡~~~

For a split second upon waking on the morning of the banquet, Buggy’s first thought hadn’t been panic for her absence, but a hum of pleasure at the warmth surrounding him. 

Guilt sent him flying into pieces to escape Crocodile and Mihawk’s arms, and they blinked up at him as though they’d forgotten her too. Buggy only relaxed when he saw the reality of the day harden their faces. 

Another day full of hushed voices, and waiting. Scribbled notes, and stifled comfort. Fear, and an unsteady hope that Shanks would be the hero again. 

~~~

“What’s this,” Buggy growled at the wide eyed, young pirate that had set down a bright blue cocktail on Y/N’s desk. He’d found himself sitting there tonight, updating the other men while the suitors were introduced, and he closed his eyes to stay focused on the muffled voices. 

The clown had started to panic earlier when his star was told to leave her locket behind, almost losing her because his gift didn’t fit the “theme.” She must have stuffed it into her dress from the way her heart thumped even louder within him, and he coughed to fight the heat in his throat.

I’m here, baby. I’ve got you.

“You like sweet drinks, don’t you?”

Buggy jolted, pretending that surprised squeak hadn’t just left his throat before he met Crocodile’s eyes across the room. 

“Y-yeah,” Buggy frowned, but he avoided the collection of garnishes and tiny umbrellas to take a sip from the curly straw. He found the taste of pineapple, coconuts, and sooo much sugar, covering up the rum that he most definitely needed. “Thanks.”

The scarred man raised a brow, and Mihawk’s soft chuckle from his own desk added to the shiver going up Buggy's spine.

They’re trying to distract me… 

“Thanks, daddy,” Buggy corrected, almost smiling at that frightening, but pleased face until her voice filled with hope.

‘Mr. Iceburg?’

“Mr. Iceburg,” he repeated while her heart went wild. 

“Iceburg,” Crocodile asked quietly, looking at his own notes. “From Galley La? He wasn’t on the list…”

“She knows him already,” Buggy reported. He tried to let it mean nothing. “She likes him.”

“Of course, Sylvad’s has had ties with Water 7 for generations,” Crocodile nodded, rubbing his hand over his face. 

“She may like him, but she loves you,” Mihawk startled him as he appeared beside her desk. “Don’t forget.”

“I’d never forget that,” Buggy snapped, sighing when wicked fingers teased over his tense shoulders, helping him focus.

He focused on her breath, her heart, while she met all the men vying to touch her, to take her. He focused on trying not to freak out the longer the night went on without hearing that familiar, heroic voice. Their best chance.

“Something’s wrong,” Buggy rasped, hardly hearing Crocodile's chair thump onto the new carpet over the deafening silence of his star forgetting to breathe. It seemed like her heart had stopped beating, until her uncle’s grating voice came through, and then it pounded like a bird smashing itself against a window to try to escape.

“The clothes suit you well, Emperor.”

“I had no idea that fashionable friends could be so generous,” Shanks charmed, his voice a miracle. “Or that I’d have the pleasure of meeting such a gorgeous, little bunny again so soon. Sorry, you're a gorgeous, little doe, aren’t you?”

“It’s Shanks,” Buggy shared, almost jealous of the relief that washed over their faces before he closed his eyes to the world again.

Shanks played the roguish pirate to perfection, and Buggy had no notes for his performance. Even muffled, Sylvad’s voice was clearly satisfied, eating up the Emperor’s words. 

“Red Hair made it? He’s a suitor?”

The soft questions ripped Buggy’s eyes open, and the relief he still saw there made him sick. 

“She hates him.”

“What do you–”

“Who does she–”

“She HATES SHANKS!” 

Buggy didn’t notice when he’d flown into pieces, but he floated erratically before them, trying to understand, trying to explain. 

“How… She didn’t say that out loud, did she,” Mihawk asked after a pause, studying his movements. 

“Why would she hate him,” Crocodile mused. His silver eyes stripped him down as he stepped too close.

“How the fuck would I know,” Buggy yelled, horror filling his veins at the way her heart seemed to fight itself in its cage. “This is how she sounds when she’s with Uncle ShitFuck, or that fucking doctor! She hates Shanks. She HATES HIM! What are we gonna do?”

“Shh, shh, darling,” Mihawk breathed, catching Buggy’s face in both hands while his body still flew through the air. “Y/N thought he was going to steal you from her. If she hasn’t forgiven him, then we’ll just have to find another way.”

“But she–”

Every floating piece of him stuttered in the air when cruel lips kissed his so sweetly. 

“I am long overdue for a hunting trip,” the swordsman teased over his skin, twisting those wicked fingers into his hair. “Having all three of us here is a waste. I’ll go thin out the competition.”

“No.”

The refusal was deep, yet gentle, and that scarred face towered over them both while Crocodile tugged at Mihawk’s chin. 

“We’re not doing that. We can’t go against her wishes, not until we know why she’s doing this.”

Buggy felt pain searing behind his eyes while he tried to listen to two things at once: Cedrick Sylvad’s speech, and the moral dilemma of these ex-Warlords.

“I agree,” Mihawk said evenly, barely sparing a glance while Buggy brought his body back together beside him. “But these men want our little rabbit, and her illustrious name for their own reasons. If it’s possible to convince the worst of them to drop out, then we should try.”

“Are you running away again,” Crocodile sighed, the pressure in the air making Buggy want to sink to the floor.  

“Don’t worry, daddy,” Mihawk purred, expertly slicing through all the tension in the room. “I have a spare earpiece snail, so you can scold me all you like while I’m away.” 

‘Did you hear me,’ Cedrick seemed to hiss at Buggy, swimming in guilt for falling into the distraction of the men before him. 

“Chase?”

“What is it,” Mihawk checked in, scanning his face. 

“No,” the clown paused, more endless horror pouring into him. He had to step away, the sounds of her panic while she raced through the woods sending him into helpless rage. The other men let him feel into it, until he rounded on them again. 

“They’re hunting her like an animal,” Buggy seethed, flinching at the sound of his star falling, panting, pushing herself on. “She’s terrified, she’s– Fuck this!”

A wave of sand hit the door before Crocodile blocked his path, only fueling that need to protect her. 

“Marines on call. Germa Kingdom. Big Mom Pirates. Fishman royalty. And we still don’t know what kind of security forces Sylvad keeps on the island, not to mention whatever the Concealer keeps around him, or the President of Galley La,” the larger man listed, his voice firm, but going soft when he touched Buggy’s cheek. “The second you hear our sweet girl ask for help, or say that she doesn’t wanna be there, I will drain them all to dust… but we still don’t know what he has on her. She told us she wanted to go.”

‘This isn’t a dream…’

In a trance, the clown let the other men lead him to that flashy, green couch, his notepad and fruity drink set up on the new coffee table while he slumped into her spot between them. 

“Shanks got her,” he reported, unable to share in their relief with the sound of her strangled breaths so loud in his head. He could barely hear a thing in her world now, the muffled voices beyond theirs were too difficult to make out, especially when another heartbeat filled his mind. His old friend must have been carrying her, and the sound of both of their hearts pounding so close made his gloves damp when he rubbed at his tired eyes. 

“Don’t worry,” Mihawk tugged at him gently until Buggy curled in against his exposed chest. The swordsman didn’t recoil from the faded paint, or the hot tears that streaked down his skin the longer the clown let himself stay there. “If our little rabbit doesn’t trust our hero, then we’ll just convince the rest of the suitors to give up the hunt.”

“Try not to start any wars, little prince,” Crocodile hummed, setting his massive hand over Mihawk’s where it was resting on Buggy’s thigh. 

“War is tedious. I am looking forward to a peaceful life,” Mihawk vowed, stroking Buggy’s hair while the man let exhaustion relax him deeper into his lap. “We just need to retrieve our lovers first.”

~~~🤡🤡🤡~~~

~~~~~~

~~~🌲🌲🌲~~~

“Oh sweetie, you look so–”

“Take a bite.”

Mom’s too shiny smile hardened slightly before she tasted your oatmeal, avoiding the servants that hovered around you in clouds of makeup and hair spray. 

“You’re about to have brunch with your suitors,” she reminded you when you snatched the food from her, practically inhaling it before more pencils or brushes could touch your lips. “Don’t you think it will look strange if you don’t eat with them?”

“You don’t seem to care how strange it looks to sell off your own daughter,” you laughed, noticing a servant’s eyes widen just a fraction when they took your empty bowl. “I’m cooperating, but I will not be leaving my food or drinks unattended until I feel safer. You want your child to feel safe, don’t you, mother?”

“I found some,” Kat beamed when she barged through the door, waving a deck of playing cards above her head. She tossed it to you, and you gasped, surprised that you caught it from the air before it could hit one of the staff. Thankfully, the full skirted dress you’d been stuffed into this morning had pockets, so you tucked your little game away, forcing your mom to taste the rest of your breakfast before the brunch dates began.

But Kat was making that face. Little sister face. 

“What’s that,” you gestured toward the item she had tried to conceal when she sat across from you, tucking it behind her body.

“Just some trash I found in the hall. Do you want some more coffee?”

“Give it,” you ordered, giving her big sister face.

“It’s nothing we didn’t already know, okay? So just…”

“At least I’m not the only one being used,” a sharp laugh left your throat. “How much berry do you think he’s making off of this game?”

Mom ordered the staff to leave before leaning toward Kat, and didn’t whisper quietly enough on her way out.

“Brunch is about to start. Make sure she looks presentable.”

“Can’t sell me off if I'm not pretty, can you?”

“Y/N,” she started, looking convincingly hurt, but Kat got her out of the room before either of you could make it worse. 

You stared at the “trash” in your lap, the crisp scent of expensive ink and paper filling your lungs while you examined the brochure. 

‘Which Hunter Will Claim Her?’

That tantalizing question was scrawled across every page, while the nine suitors each had their own section, their profile, their face, and a stupid little quote about winning you. This barbaric game was disguised behind a snooty font spread over images of dappled sunlight through Sylvad trees, and decorated with arrows and leaves.

Cedar leaves.

You wanted to tear it to shreds, but you were pulled in, studying every detail.

~~~~~~

~~~~~~

Giberson

Age: Couldn’t Recall

Height: Misplaced Measurements

Birthday: August 14th

Title: “Warehouseman”

Favorite Food: Rye Whiskey

How he plans to win: “I’m sure the lovely lady and I will have a delightful time. You don’t get to be my age without learning a few tricks.”

~

Ichiji

Age: 21

Height: 186 cm (6'1")

Birthday: March 2

Title: Prince of the Germa Kingdom

Favorite Food: Strawberries and Whiskey

How he plans to win: "I’m a Vinsmoke."

~

Niji

Age: 21

Height: 185 cm (6'1")

Birthday: March 2nd

Title: Prince of the Germa Kingdom

Favorite Food: Blueberries and Scotch

How he plans to win: “She’s coming with us. If I don’t win, there’s two more Vinsmoke’s.”

~

Yonji

Age: 21

Height: 194 cm (6'4")

Birthday: March 2

Title: Prince of the Germa Kingdom

Favorite Food: Green Peas

How he plans to win: “I wouldn’t mind ending up with a woman like her, so I’m gonna turn her into a princess.”

~

Iceburg

Age: 40

Height: 199 cm (6'6")

Birthday: January 3

Title: President of the Galley-La Company, and Mayor of Water 7

Favorite Food: Curry Made by an Old Friend. A Drunk, Old Friend.

How he plans to win: “Mm, well... I suppose I’ll win because I know her best.”

~

Fukaboshi

Age: 24

Height: 604 cm (19’10”)

Birthday: February 4th

Title: Prince of the Ryugu Kingdom

Favorite Food: Abalone Steak

How he plans to win: “I hope that she carries peace in her heart. If she does, I will stop at nothing to earn her love.”

~

Cracker

Age: 45

Height: 307 cm (10'1")

Birthday: February 28th

Title: Sweet Commander of the Big Mom Pirates, and the Minister of Biscuit

Favorite Food: Biscuits. Dislikes Kimchi and Carbonated Drinks.

How he plans to win: “Easy. I’ll outdo them all.”

~

Katakuri

Age: 48

Height: 509 cm (16'8½")

Birthday: November 25th

Title: Sweet Commander of the Big Mom Pirates, and the Minister of Flour

Favorite Food: Doughnuts. Dislikes hot ramen.

How he plans to win: “I will win because I must.”

~

Shanks

Age: 39

Height: 199 cm (6'6")

Birthday: March 9

Title: Emperor of the Sea

Favorite Food: Kimchi Fried Rice and Lobster. Dislikes Blueberries.

How he plans to win: “Just gonna show the cutie a good time.”

~~~~~~

‘Make Your Bets Now!’

Kat was right. You knew that the audience was enjoying the game, gambling while you just tried to survive, trying to secure the least abhorrent future that you could. 

“Venison…”

“Heeyyy,” Kat fumbled through positivity as she pulled the brochure from your white-knuckled grip. “At least we know how tall they are now!”

“I love you,” you thanked her, amazed that you could still laugh.

~~~

“Such pretty, little fingers… I hope I pass your test.”

“It’s not a test,” you lied, shuffling cards instead of tearing the old man’s eyes out. “Just a game.”

“It has to be the Queen of Hearts,” Giberson winked over his Bloody Mary.

“It’s the Four of Diamonds.”

“So you are choosing the next winner,” he scolded lightly when your prediction was revealed.

“How could I possibly choose when I have so many charming options,” you reminded him as you pushed the deck across the table so he could shuffle for himself. You weren’t ready to pick and choose between these hunters. There’d been no time to feel them out. 

So they had to guess.

The lighthearted brunch felt anything but with so many eyes on your skin, especially with Uncle’s giant projector snail that blew up your image across the building again. All the smaller snails circled around you, their slow, unreal eyes reminding you how trapped you were.

Always trapped.

“That’s alright, dear. Making decisions is tough, isn’t it? I’ve been hearing about what a smart girl you are though! So, what’s the card?”

The old man’s condescension was so typical, you were contemplating rooting for him, just so you could end up with a predictable partner.

“Jack of Hearts,” you smiled after counting down twenty two cards out loud, yet again.

“Whew, that sure is something,” Giberson waved the Jack of Hearts he’d revealed, making sure the rest of the guests could see while he bragged about you, as though your skills were somehow reflective of his own talents. 

As though he already owned you.

“You shuffled,” you teased, guiding him to set up the trick one more time. “Can you guess the card?”

“Queen of Hearts,” he winked again.

Gross. At least he might die soon, that’s a plus.

~~~

“You look beautiful this morning, Y/N,” the firstborn Vinsmoke brother purred when he took Giberson’s seat. 

Every moment was on full display for the other suitors, and for the guests that had stayed on the island for the entertainment. It seemed that the courtyard was to be your new realm, with plenty of space for your much taller dates to join you at your little breakfast table that was set up on a slightly elevated platform. 

A stage. 

“Thank you, Prince Ichigi. You’re looking quite well yourself.”  

Fuck.

It wasn’t a lie, and your pulse sped at the smug smile he gave when he tilted his head down to examine you over his dark, red glasses. 

There was something dangerous in that smile, and the fact that he didn’t even try to hide it made you pause, not sure how best to deal with this entitled prince.

“What does our lovely bride enjoy when she’s not being chased,” Ichiji purred, already claiming you with his words. His sunglasses did little to hide his eyes as they raked over your skin. 

“I enjoy numbers. Mathematics,” you almost squeaked. Heat rose up to your cheeks while you started to shuffle the cards, noticing the number “1” embroidered on his maroon cloak while you explained the goal of the card trick. 

“Seven of Clubs.”

“I’m sorry, Prince Ichiji, you’re wrong again.”

You had to risk a small sip from your untested water glass to fight the dryness on your tongue.

“That’s alright,” Ichiji teased, nodding at the sound of bells marking his time. “That’s why my family always brings numbers.”

“My turn, brother,” the blue haired prince announced as he clapped him on the shoulder. 

“Be nice to our little princess, Niji,” he ordered, pressing your knuckles to his lips before heading back toward the rest of his family. 

“Of course,” your new date smirked, leaning back in his chair with his hands clasped behind that blue head of hair. 

The large spikes and swoops of his hairstyle covered one of his eyes under his gold sunglasses, hiding one of the eyebrows that you kept trying not to glance at. The three brothers shared an odd curl to the ends of their brows, You couldn’t tell if it was a cosmetic choice, but didn’t want to risk insulting such powerful men in case they were sensitive about it.

“Don’t tell me my brother already wore you out,” he clicked his tongue, snapping you out of your memories. 

“I’m so sorry, Prince Niji, I must still be tired from the banquet. What were you saying?”

“Fetch our little bride some coffee,” he snapped at the nearest servant, banging lightly on the table until the dishes rattled.

His harsh tone was almost enough to make you forget your precautions, but you had enough to worry about without the uncertainty of who prepared your drink.

That curly brow raised with satisfied surprise when you rested your hand over his, his lips parting while he ate up your act.

“Would you mind sharing your coffee, Prince Niji? I’d hate to waste any more of our time waiting to wake up.”

“What’s mine is yours, princess,” Niji purred. He caught your hand as you pulled away, and you let him hold it while you drank from his mug. His coffee was unbelievably sweet.

Stop. Don’t think about…

“Thank you,” you hummed, swallowing the heat in your throat while you tried to not to look at his blue hair with that practically syrupy coffee still on your tongue. “Will you help me with a little trick?”

~~~

“It’s up to you, little brother,” Niji reported when his time ran out. 

“Don’t worry, I’ve been watching these pretty hands,” Yonji assured him, kissing your fingers before he sat down. His dark eyes seemed fierce without colored glasses to hide them, and his green hair was slicked back instead of swooping up and out like his older brothers. He wasn’t hiding his interesting features.

“So you think you know the trick,” you challenged, giving him a chance. 

“I think I’ll win your heart,” he swooned, and the sappy look on his face made your hands fumble while you shuffled the deck. 

He focused intently now as you laid them out, and revealed certain cards, counting down to the guess. 

“What card is—“

“Three of Spades,” he blurted out. “What’s your guess?”

“Three of Clubs.”

“Again.”

The youngest prince refused your small talk, avoiding your gaze until his final guess.

“King of Hearts,” Yonji beamed, puppy dog eyes finally on your face again. “What’s your guess, princess?”

Would it be weird to marry Kat’s favorite?

You didn’t glance at your sister, but knew she’d be watching while the green haired prince scored the first point, hearts practically floating around his head when you revealed the card. 

“I told you, princess,” Yonji vowed as he stole a quick peck to your cheek. “I’ll be the one to win your heart.”

~~~🌲🌲🌲~~~

~~~~~~

~~~⏰🌲🌲🌲⏰~~~

~~~⚫~~~

The man that had won your heart beamed when he saw you gazing up at him. His blue hair seemed to glow in the sun, but nothing could gleam like those strong arms, slick with sweat while he climbed down the ropes to meet you on the deck of the ship.

“Oh my, look at you,” Iceburg hummed, tying a bandana over his hair to catch that salty water before it dripped down his face. You stared at those gorgeous, purple tattoos that crawled down his shoulders and arms before he patted the top of your head. “Where’s your dad hiding?”

“He had to take a call, but I helped him write this proposal, so he said I could bring it to you,” you squirmed, handing him the file.

“He’s got you working at thirteen,” he whistled, taking the document while he shook his head. 

“I’m fourteen now,” you declared. 

You couldn’t keep yourself from rolling onto your toes a bit, lifting your chin in hopeful challenge. 

“You’re gonna be running things soon, huh,” he smirked.

Mind going absolutely blank under his attention, you just gaped at him like a fucking creep.

“This ship’s almost finished.” Iceburg leaned close, knocking on the railing behind you. “Would you like a tour? It is your family’s wood that makes it so strong, after all.”

“I– Are you sure? I’ll be fine waiting if you need to get back to work. You don’t need to watch me.”

The desire to follow him around like a puppy was overpowered by the distaste at him feeling the need to babysit you, but the look on his face made you laugh, forgetting it all.

“I don’t wanna go back to work,” the handsome shipwright complained, scrunching up his face in a pout that rivaled your sister’s. “I’d rather show you around, and grab some lunch when your dad gets here. Can we?”

“Okay!”

~~~

This gorgeous, lovely man knew more about Sylvad wood than most of dad’s executives. Listening to him talk about it always made you happy, knowing that your family was part of something so important, so loved. 

Iceburg led you through the ship, telling you how he had worked each piece of lumber, how it all moved with the wind and the waves, even guiding you to slide your hand along the trees your family had grown, smooth and silky to the touch after he’d treated them. 

“Beautiful, isn’t it,” he praised softly, watching your hand against the wood before pulling a pen from his toolbelt. “Well, let’s go get some food, girlie. You can tell your dad what a great job you did presenting your proposal.”

“But you didn’t even read it,” you blurted out, shocked when he pressed the document against a wall to sign his name.

“You and Arbo are good people, plus you’ve got the best lumber in the world,” he laughed while he led you up the stairs toward the sound of footsteps. “I trust you.”

“Thank you, Mr. Iceburg… but you just agreed to build a small fleet to expand our shipping operations in the East Blue. Are you sure you’ll have time for that while you help Tom finish the sea train? Hi, daddy!”

“There’s my girl,” your dad grinned, kissing your temple when you joined him on the deck. “Make any deals without me?”

Iceburg handed the document over, waving his own copy in your direction. Your skin flushed with heat again when he snuck you a wink while your dad glanced at his signature. 

“She’s very convincing. You’ll be able to retire in no time if she keeps this up.”

He was the perfect man. Strong, kind, silly, sweet, and so painfully hot, it drove you mad. You’d had a few crushes on your classmates over the last couple of years, but nothing compared to the way you felt when Iceburg looked at you like that. 

“I don’t doubt it,” your dad praised. He wrapped his arm around the shipwright’s shoulders, nodding his head toward the docks. “Is Kokoro still making that delightful curry?”

“I’ll never let her stop,” Iceburg laughed while he led the way. “Tom should be over there too, let’s go grab some lunch and catch up.”

“Sounds perfect. Do you want to come, sweetheart?”

~~~⚫~~~

~~~⏰🌲🌲🌲⏰~~~

~~~~~~

~~~🌲🌲🌲~~~

He’s not who I thought he was. He’s a creep. Another leech trying to latch on and drain as much berry from me as he can. Don’t forget. 

You were pathetic, getting flustered while he watched your hands, his calm voice taking away all your caution. 

“I have to apologize,” Iceburg hummed while you shuffled.

“Why is that?”

“Mm, well,” he looked down at his striped jacket while he patted his pocket. “I left Tyrannosaurus with my secretary. I didn’t think bringing a pet would be… I should be more focused on you.”

“What do you— oh!”

The cards scattered across the table when you jumped, laughter sneaking out of you. 

“This is Velociraptor,” Iceburg announced as a field mouse crawled out of his breast pocket. “I found him during the chase, I hope it’s alright to have pets during our stay. Are you okay, Y/N?”

“I’m fine, sorry,” you recovered from losing yourself in that laughter before gathering the cards again. Your eyes were still watering when you watched the cute creature dive back into his pocket after a few soft pets from his strong fingers. “Can you guess the card?”

“Oh my,” his brows furrowed, watching your waiting hands. “I really need to pay attention, don’t I? I’d love to spend some more time with you.”

He leaned forward, his height making him tower over you at the little table, and you found yourself blinking up at him.

Forgetting.

“I…”

“Is it the Seven of Clubs?”

“No, Mr… No, Iceburg.”

~~~

Prince Fukaboshi was led through the courtyard by a few attendants, both fishmen and mermen featured amongst the group. He looked down at you, mouth opening to speak before Uncle’s voice carried over.

“Why don’t we give our hunter a closer look?”

Grabbing onto the edge of the table took all of your focus, and you knew that your fake smile fell when you started moving through the air. The ground flew away, the wooden platform beneath you rising up toward the prince, gentle surprise on his face.

The snails on the table didn’t seem phased by the change in elevation, and it was hard to pretend they didn’t exist while they slowly shifted positions to better capture you and your date for the audience below. 

You decided not to look down to determine what kind of contraption had lifted you so high, instead looking at the prince before you. Fukaboshi took up your entire field of vision, and it was easy to see the concern on his expansive face.

“Are you alright, Miss Sylvad?”

His teeth look so sharp…

“Please, Prince Fukaboshi,” you trembled, focusing on the cards as much as you could, “call me Y/N. Can you guess the— oh, I’m sorry, are you familiar with these sorts of playing cards?”

You were barely hanging on. He spoke, he guessed, and you could feel the rumble of his voice even though your mind wasn’t quite letting it in. Your body performed without you, your lips reciting words that carried no meaning. 

“This courtship custom is unlike any I have seen before,” the prince frowned while you set up the cards for the last guess. “Since it is all strange to me, I couldn’t be certain, but…”

The pause was long enough for you to meet his eyes, so large, and filled with what looked like compassion. 

No. 

“Miss Y/N, I am seeking your hand so that my people can gain protection and resources so that they never suffer the cruelty and humiliation of slavery again,” Fukaboshi declared. The snails on the table lowered their eyes, but his voice boomed too loud to hide. 

Bells. 

“That is—“

“I never want to see anyone treated the way my sister was by those monsters at the Reverie.”

“Monsters?”

The dangerous question barely made it past your lips before the platform jolted, slowly bringing you down, away from his determined face while the bells kept ringing. 

“Are you being held against your will? I cannot abide another moment of this if you are being used like a pet for their amusement.”

“N-no,” you panicked, craning your neck to see him while you shook your head, hands pleading, voice dripping with lies. “You are so kind, thank you, Prince Fukaboshi! I’m sorry, I must seem scared, but I’m just nervous. This is all a bit overwhelming, but I promise I am glad to be here!”

“Your turn’s over, Prince. You heard the girl.”

Cracker’s manic smile appeared as the table sank to the ground. It felt like your frantic heart had been left in the sky, floating up there with those huge, concerned eyes. 

“Thank you, Prince Fukaboshi,” you beamed, feeling forever selfish at the temptation. 

I can’t risk a stranger, a whole kingdom. I’m not worth it. 

Neither of us would make it out alive anyway. 

“It has been my honor,” he said evenly, though his eyes were scanning the crowd now, a new tension held within his enormous, warrior’s body. 

The snails woke up, those slow moving eyes reminding you that the show must go on.

“You’re a good girl, aren’t you?”

“I’m sorry?” 

Cracker sat down, and the platform probably should have lifted a bit as the shirtless man was closer to your reality, but he was still even taller than… 

You had to stop comparing these men to your daydreams. 

“Eight of Diamonds… Damn,” he brushed off his loss before looming over you. His dark, brown glove was softer than you expected it to be when he cupped your cheek, almost the whole side of your face. 

“You understand family duties, don’t you?”

All you could do was nod under the wild look he gave you.

He’s fucking unstable.

“That’s good. Family is everything.”

Is he flirting? 

A dangerous giggle almost escaped, but you kept it in, smiling sweetly while he failed every guess.

The bells finally rang out, but they couldn’t save you from his last words, his promise.

“Our family needs you, Y/N. I don’t care if you’re my wife or my sister, I’ll protect you with my life.”

~~~

This time you were grateful for the moving platform, a reason to look away from Cracker’s confident face. The true reason for the movement came into view, his brother waiting patiently for you to settle just below his eye level. 

Those eyes… 

Charlotte Katakuri was too fucking tall. Too fucking scary. Crimson eyes assessed you, his arched brows and sharp nose not nearly harsh enough to distract from those thick, dark lashes of his.

He’s too fucking pretty.

Now that you were this close, you could see scars on both of his cheeks. They led down toward his mouth, still concealed by that massive scarf. Prince Fukaboshi’s sharp teeth came to mind when you wondered what he could be hiding, so you shuffled and shuffled, trying to think about anything else.

“It’s good to see you, Y/N,” his polite voice made you shiver, seeming to vibrate the elevated stage you were perched on. 

“Same to you, Katakuri,” your voice shook. You couldn’t afford to show this much fear. Predators always looked for weak prey. “Would you mind helping me with a little trick?”

“If that’s what you wish,” he agreed. There was no way to tell if the hint of a smile you heard in his voice was truly hidden beneath his scarf, but it set you on edge, nonetheless. 

“Can you guess the card?”

“It’s the Ten of Hearts.”

He stated it as if it were true, as if he were simply remarking on the weather around him.

And it was true. You’d known it before you revealed it, this simple math trick like the comforting rhythm of a familiar heartbeat. 

“You’re right,” you breathed when you turned it over. “Care to go again?”

Katakuri nodded slowly, but his eyes never left your face, ignoring the cards on the table until you asked for his next guess.

“The Queen of Hearts.”

“Yes. Have you seen this trick before?”

“In a way,” came his cryptic response. “Shall we go again?”

He definitely wasn’t paying attention to the cards. Those stunning eyes were so fucking intense as they bore into your skin that you almost forgot to do the math before you asked for his next guess.

Then you wished you had forgotten.

“What’s the–”

“Shuffle again.”

“But you haven’t–”

You stopped breathing when one of his giant hands shot toward you, his fingers sooo fucking big when he laid them over yours. 

Delicate. This giant was gentle when he covered your hands, covered the cards, practically covered half the little table.

“This card makes you sad,” he whispered, though there was no point with all the surveillance, and with his booming voice at the center of attention. But still, he whispered. “Why don’t you shuffle again?”

Fuck. fuckfuckfuck. Stop. 

There you go. Just smile. 

A small miracle let you slip out of your body, out of your mind, while you shuffled the unrevealed Six of Spades back into the deck. 

Katakuri was still quiet, still watching. So polite while he guessed the right card, letting you pull yourself back together.

Hiding all the struggle behind your Sylvad smile.

“Thank you, Y/N,” he touched your hand again when the platform started to lower. “I’m looking forward to our next meeting.”

You hadn’t noticed the bells.

~~~🌲🌲🌲~~~

~~~~~~

~~~🐊🤡🗡️~~~

“When are you leaving?”

“There’s no point in waiting,” Mihawk avoided the larger man’s eyes. “The sooner I convince the competition to back out, the sooner Y/N will be free of them.”

“Yeah, but how,” Buggy sighed from his lap, the swordsman’s skilled fingers nearly dragging him down to sleep already. “How the fuck are you gonna convince these assholes that they don’t wanna marry her? She’s perfect! Plus, they get in on that stupid company, and get whatever other bullshit DickHole is selling. What can you do besides poke ‘em with your fancy stick?”

“That’s what I plan to find out,” Mihawk smiled, though the finality in his tone was enough.

“Come on, Buggy,” Crocodile nudged his legs aside, offering the clown his hand while he stared at their determined lover. “Let’s remind our little bird why he should fly back home when he’s done pecking people’s eyes out.”

Buggy let out an exhausted giggle while Mihawk shivered, his eyes rolling back just a bit. Just enough.

“You thought you could run away that easily, huh,” Crocodile threatened with his words, and with the tip of his hook below that sculpted chin.

More guilt almost tore the clown away while he watched them, but Buggy chugged his sugary drink, grateful for the quiet of faraway sleep. He started to pull the swordsman up by the collar of his frighteningly fancy jacket, and that arched brow was an instinctual warning.

The clown heeded the warning, loosening his grip on the jacket, only to yank the man off the couch by his hair. Crocodile joined in on his smug laughter, roughly pulling Mihawk against him before he’d stopped moaning from the unexpected pain.

“You’re not leaving tonight.”

Heavy. 

Whatever they held between them felt heavier than either had expected.

“I’ll go get the bed ready,” Buggy sighed as he half floated toward the door, “but I’ll need another drink if you guys take too long.”

~~~🗡️🤡🐊~~~

~~~~~~

~~~🗡️🐊🗡️🐊~~~

“Are you alright?”

Mihawk laughed at the question, and Crocodile wanted to shake him. He was sick of seeing his lovers fall apart right in front of him, with nothing he could do, or even understand.

He ached to understand this man. They had faced each other in battle just a few years ago, but that Summit War felt like a fever dream now.

Not that this new life didn't feel like a dream.

This man…

Crocodile kept getting him. Meeting him in ways that both surprised, and soothed him. 

Mihawk laughed again at the thought of new vocabulary, but Crocodile pulled him close.

“I’m not ready to lose my business partner,” Crocodile confessed, the words too heavy for the smirk he tried to give. 

The words were enough.

Mihawk laid his deadly fingers along that silk vest, silently asking for a kiss while he stared up at the taller man. 

The swordsman felt like a fraud. 

How could someone like him that had carried nothing for so long be filled with so much? He didn’t want to lie anymore than he already had. 

Crocodile gave him what he wanted. A heavy kiss.

“Let’s not keep our clown waiting,” Crocodile rasped, tracing his thumb along Mihawk’s sharp features. 

“Wouldn’t dream of it.”

~~~🗡️🐊🗡️🐊~~~

~~~~~~

~~~🗡️🤡🐊~~~

They’re holding hands… 

Crocodile and Mihawk had called through the door, all of their hands occupied until Mihawk handed the slack-jawed clown another cocktail. 

“Nice room service,” Buggy tried to recover. 

“Come here, little clown.”

The scarred man let go of one lover to reach for another. Cupping his hand along Buggy’s jaw, with those large fingers combing into the hair at the back of his neck, Crocodile breathed down on him until he was nodding, red lips still parted.

“I haven’t been giving you enough attention,” Crocodile purred, squeezing his face lightly when Buggy tried to argue. “But it looks like we’re gonna have plenty of alone time soon. Plenty of time for me to spoil you.”

“Y-yup! Lots of…”

“Is that what you want?”

“Sure, whatever you say, bos— Yes, daddy.”

“Good boy.”

Buggy disconnected at the ankles to float up into Crocodile’s deep kiss. He nearly spilled his drink before the larger man lowered him down again, eyes dark and satisfied while he watched his clown. 

“You deserve more attention, but you handled him so well. Help me remind—“

“Let’s fuck him up, daddy!”

Buggy downed his drink with one hand while the other snuck past Crocodile’s body to wrap around Mihawk’s throat. 

“You do know that I’m still Dracule Mihawk, don’t you?”

Wicked fingers dug into the floating hand, dragging it down his own chest while he resisted. 

“Whatcha gonna do, Hawkeyes? Stab me? Slice me,” Buggy laughed, setting down his glass before sending his other hand. 

Crocodile started to undress, chuckling softly at his boys. 

The air shifted as danger, delicious danger, poured from the swordsman while he leaned into Buggy’s touch, forcing his floating hands closer to his own body with every taunting step.

“I’m going to play.”

Mihawk’s golden eyes seemed to flicker with his threat, and Buggy felt a flash of fear, a glimpse of a beast. In that moment, he almost gave in, almost let the beast win.

Wherever his burst of confidence came from, Buggy went with it.

“Why don’t you play with daddy’s balls then, huh, crybaby?”

One of the clown’s hands broke free from that hold, and Mihawk couldn’t fight the moan that tore through him when gloved fingers ripped into his hair again, forcing him to look at Crocodile. The larger man was so very large, stroking himself while he sat on the edge of the bed. 

Gods, that fucking cock.

Buggy took advantage of Mihawk’s wonderment by kicking the backs of his knees until he hit the floor, and wrapped himself around the swordsman’s back to leave lipstick-stained bites along his neck. 

“Don’t lie. You wanna get fucking wrecked, don’t you?”

“I don’t like liars,” Crocodile teased, circling his thumb over his tip, taking in a quick breath of satisfaction at the desperate look on Mihawk’s face at the sight. “Do you want us to wreck you, little prince?”

Mihawk melted as that lovely hook pressed into his throat. Buggy rubbed himself against his back, and the swordsman laughed, feeling entirely fucking spoiled. 

“Please, daddy.”

What a fucking sight… 

The scarred man still couldn’t understand how these lovely men were somehow his, not after everything he’d done, everything he’d felt before. Watching Mihawk beg so sweetly while Buggy stripped him made Crocodile’s cock so hard it almost hurt, his rough fingers easing up against that sensitive flesh, until wicked fingers, wicked lips, replaced his own grip. 

“Fuck. Such an evil little mouth you’ve got– Shit…”

Buggy realized his own mouth was hanging open as he undressed, but he couldn’t care to close it while he watched Mihawk swallow more than looked humanly possible.

“Help me out, Buggy,” Crocodile groaned while he gripped Mihawk’s hair, his hand bobbing up and down with that pretty face. “Stretch out our filthy prince for me. No way he’s leaving here before I ruin that perfect, little ass.”

Sloppy, muffled whines escaped him, and Mihawk’s eyes rolled at the daunting threat. Buggy was there, lubed, and ungloved fingers fucking into him until he shook with need, with pleasure. 

“Get over here,” Crocodile growled, stepping back to yank Mihawk toward the bed by the hook around his neck. Buggy helped him along, floating hands lifting that moaning form into place. 

Mihawk’s place was on his hands and knees in the center of the bed, and he lost himself there in the tender and vicious touches his lovers showered him with. In their praise and teasing, pleasure and pain. In the taste of Buggy’s skin as he shoved his cock down his throat. 

He absolutely fucking lost himself when Crocodile lined himself up. He was the world’s greatest swordsman, and he enjoyed pain a great deal. Yet his former enemy was about to pierce him so thoroughly that Mihawk whimpered around Buggy's length, almost afraid. 

Then he felt nothing but that heavy cock, stretching, and claiming, and filling him until tears streamed from his golden eyes.

“So good, so fucking good for me,” Crocodile grunted. He dragged his hook down Mihawk’s side, still not believing what he was seeing. 

Dracule fucking Mihawk, moaning around a clown’s cock while his pretty, little hole sucked him in again and again. 

“Let’s give our twisted prince what he wants, eh, Buggy? Make sure he remembers where he belongs.”

Buggy stuttered in agreement, nearly gone before he obeyed. He tore at Mihawk’s hair while his other hand scraped brutally down his back. The twitching that his rough hands caused forced his cock even deeper until he spilled his pleasure down that desperate throat.

Crocodile sliced his hook around the swordsman’s body, pouring red from that perfect chest while he stuffed his little prince full. The overwhelming sensations had Mihawk coming harder than he’d thought possible, and the sounds he made were unreal. Pathetic. 

Music to the ears of his sated lovers. 

The clown didn’t need to be ordered or asked, Buggy just helped Mihawk stay steady while they pulled out of him. So many praises showered them both while the swordsman just breathed, assessing his every, vicious ache. 

Crocodile hated to leave for even a moment, but he didn’t need to worry. Buggy’s hands had already flown to the bathroom to wash themselves, spilling a bit of soap on the counter before grabbing what he needed. When Crocodile returned from the shower, Buggy was still wiping the other man clean, humming while he trailed gently over that perfect skin. 

Mihawk’s skin was littered with scars of battle and lust, of trust, and he had just enough energy for a weak smile as Buggy’s fingers danced over them all. He moaned, twitching in those gentle arms while his lovers washed him in the shower, no way to recover this soon. 

“Don’t whine, crybaby,” Buggy mumbled, too focused on cleaning and bandaging his wounds while Mihawk melted into the burn. “We’ll slice you up some more when you get back.”

“He’s right,” Crocodile hummed. Seeing these lovely boys taking care of each other gripped something deep within his chest. Whatever it was sparked fear in him, so much so that he had to pause while they laid Mihawk on the fresh sheets between them. 

I can’t lose them. Can’t lose any of them. 

“We’ll be waiting, little bird,” he pressed a kiss to Mihawk’s temple. Contented, sleepy sounds filled the air, and he tried to trust that this lovely new world wasn’t about to end. “Fly back home, alright?”

He couldn’t shape words, but Mihawk hummed his promise before he drifted away.

Home…

~~~🗡️🤡🐊~~~

~~~~~~

~~~🌲🌲🌲~~~

“Morning, Y/N— well, afternoon by now, isn’t it?”

You shuffled just to have something to focus on while you simpered for him. 

The traitor. 

“Good afternoon, Shanks. I’m looking forward to our date this evening. Since you already won, I’m afraid you’re out of the running for the next date. We have to give everyone a chance, of course.”

“Of course.” 

You couldn’t fucking believe the charm that oozed off of him when he beamed at you. 

“I’d still like to try your little game though, if that’s alright, gorgeous?”

Shanks stayed quiet while you laid out the cards, some face up, some face down, before you counted down twenty two from the remaining deck. 

A comforting rhythm, the answer already dancing in your mind. 

“It’s the Eight of Clubs,” Shanks purred, touching the back of your hand. Lingering against your skin.

He looked so fucking smug. 

A sick stillness went through you before you revealed his answer. 

Of course, he knows this trick. He probably learned it before the first time he betrayed—

“Let’s go again,” Shanks ordered, the heat in his voice sending shivers across your shoulders, crawling up your neck. 

The eyes of his competition were on you, but the Emperor looked at you like you were already his. Like you were spread out before him, venison for the skilled hunter to devour. 

“Shuffle,” Shanks threatened, catching your chin in his dangerous fingers. 

Just smile. Just pretend.

“I’m not done playing with you yet, little bunny.”

~~~🌲🌲🌲~~~

Likes, comments, and reblogs bring me much ✨dopamine✨ thank you!!

Author's Note:

Oh my goodness. Thank you so much for waiting, and for reading that giant chapter!! 🥰🙏🏼 I hope you enjoyed it, I've been going bonkers waiting to hear all your thoughts on this big ol' mess!

Let me know in the poll if you'd be interested in a separate post of my OP canon + Numbers Game canon timeline. It would give away reader's specific age, so I don't want to share it if people don't want to know!

Note on the Brochure: All of the character details included in the brochure are from Oda, except for the quotes and the missing details for Giberson. I found them on the One Piece Fandom Wiki if you’d like to go check out more about the characters' history. I live on that site, and have to give those fans the credit for compiling all those details! I already spend hours searching for specific parts in the anime for things like lines for speech patterns and such, I’d be lost without the wiki!

Note on the Card Trick: I must confess, I am not as skilled with numbers as our Numbers Girl. This is the same trick I had Buggy use during the flashback of their first night together, and I have no idea if this 15 year old youtube video is full of shit or not, but if you'd like to try it out, here's the tutorial!

Note on this line from the beginning of the chapter: "The White Stag. The hunted. The prey." Kiki Rockwell's voice has been living in my brain, and I realized this line is similar to hers in Burn Your Village "You do not dance everyday with the fear Of living in headlights, the hunted, the deer"

That song is so good, and fits so well! 🦌😭

Anyhoo, I'm off to try to catch up on all of your wonderful comments! Y'all mean the world to me, thank you so much!!! 🙏🏼💜

Tag List: @shewrites02 | @caniseethefourthsword | @hey-august | @chaoticqueen33 | @destinationmars | @novakitten0901 | @h0n3y-l3m0n05 | @dorky-birdie | @szired | @pinejayy | @laws-wife-things | @jadeddangel | @gingernut1314 | @urlocaltwink | @blue-rae18 | @bontensbabygirl | @bbnbhm | @0-sparkling-lace-0 | @ihearthazuki | @mikisspeak | @djloveyou3000 | @mercymccann | @horse-and-writer97

Chapter 33

Operation Olive Branch has compiled a working spreadsheet of ways to help families fleeing from the genocide in Palestine. If you enjoyed this fic, and are able, please click the link to find a list of GoFundMe's, as well as other ways to help.

| masterlist | about me | rules | ao3 |

[obsessivestar]

'What If It's All A RomCom?' - a Ted Nivison x Reader.

{{-Story Description: You're a youtuber with a fairly decent following deciding to help your good friend Tanner with a minor film project, with you set as the leading lady. When the actor for the male lead is a no show, Ted takes up the role himself. One problem: This short film's a Rom Com, and you just met the guy.-}}

//18+, Def gonna be some smut. Reader is implied to be afab, under 5'5 and has specifically named friends, all who have no real connection to Ted.

This story will be in multiple chapters. Also gonna post this on Wattpad and Ao3 (when I figure them out LMAO) under the same username: ObsessiveStarla. Hope you enjoy :^)

Also idk how to do all the fancy Tumblr border stuff so sorry if it's all messy :^(((//

Word count: 2.3k

Chapter 1: No Show, No Movie.

I'm keeping my eye on the road, occasionally glancing at the GPS to make sure I can guide my buddy Tanner as he drives. We had quite an early morning to get to L.A., having been on the road for the last 2 hours to get to this airbnb we'll be staying at. Tanner's nearing the end of film school, so he's getting all his classmates and anyone else that's available and interested to help him with his big final project: A legit short film, filmed, written and directed by him. Having some experience with being on camera myself, he elected to make me part of the main cast. I don't mind at all, if it'll help him out. Even if it's a romantic comedy. I'll kiss some dude, get him that 100%. I'm excited for this.

"Has Conner messaged me at all?" Tanner asks, breaking the last 20 minutes of silence. I quit out of my daydream to check Tanner's messages. Other members of the crew have updated them on their location, including a name I don't recognize, but Conner hasn't responded at all.

"Nope. Mostly everyone else is nearly there though." I responded, lightly shrugging my shoulders. A humorous but knowing smirk creeps along the edges of my lips. "Think he slept in?" "I fucking hope not." Tanner huffs, his tone suggesting he's half-joking. "He is literally /the/ male lead. He's like one of the people I need there the most today."

I put the GPS back up on the screen and lay back against the passenger seat, slightly raising a brow to myself. What would happen if he's late, or doesn't show up at all? Could we even get a replacement in time? We only booked this place for the next couple weeks.

As we get off the highway and get even closer to our destination, I see a notification pop up on Tanner's phone, it's the name I don't recognize. Ted. He's not in our friend group and I don't recall Tanner mentioning him from class.

"Is Ted a new guy?" I ask, turning my head to Tanner. "Oh, no, he's like...a friend of a friend." Tanner pauses before reiterating "He's going to be the editor. He's a youtuber, like you; he went to film school as well."

"Oh. He's like the only name I didn't recognize."

"Yeah, he's a cool guy, no worries, he'll probably be there with me to help with the, yknow, directing too."

There's room for a response, but I don't continue the conversation. We don't have a lot of money to put into this, so that airBnb is also where we'll be filming everything. Most of the film crew and extra actors got their own accommodations elsewhere, but some of us will be staying /at that/ location itself. Wonder if that includes the editor? It'd be weird to share a house with a dude I didn't know, but if Tanner trusts him, I will as well. "I know where to go from here, let everyone know we'll be there soon."

I take Tanner's phone and let everyone know we're close by, including Ted, before setting the phone aside. Tanner pulls into what I thought was a street at first, only to notice its the driveway of the airbnb. Wild how we can't afford multiple sets and hotels, but can afford this villa-like estate for nearly a month. Hey, whatever works, right?

Tanner parks by the many other vehicles and grabs his phone before we both hop out. I can't help but look up at how tall the building is. It looks like one of those frat houses an influencer would own, like if you told me this was owned by fuckin' 'disney channel flow' Team 10, I would 100% believe you.

Tanner and I are greeted by most of the cast and crew as we approach the front door of the house, giving the appropriate hugs and handshakes as we head inside. That's when I spotted a tall man in a dark green sweater fixing up some professional looking cameras, dark hair slicked up to add to his already impressive height, with circular glasses to match the relaxed vibe I'm getting from him. To be fair, he only stands out so much to me because I don't recognize him. This must be Ted.

He looks up from his camera when he spots Tanner and I greeting the other crew members. I casually glance away to one of the pictures on the wall to avoid giving the impression I was staring. I have a habit of fixing my eyes onto people without realizing it.

"Traffic?" Is the first word I hear out of Ted's mouth, directed at Tanner. I don't really know what I was expecting to hear come out of this man, but it certainly wasn't a voice like that. It's strong, deep, almost fake sounding, like he's already playing a character, but no, that's just him.

"Dude, we passed by, like, 3 accidents" Tanner shakes his head slightly, putting his hands on his hips. "And Conner hasn't even gotten back to me, It's been an interesting morning."

As they have their conversation, my thoughts turn to a more curious nature as I contemplate what this guy actually does as a youtuber. If he went to film school as well, does he make long video essays? Commentary, like me?

"This is (Y/N), mine and Joe's friend." My thoughts are cut by the sound of my name, realizing Tanner was introducing me to Ted. Makes sense. We don't know each other. "She's gonna be the female lead."

"Ahhh okay, nice to finally meet you. I'm Ted." Ted personally greets me with a gentle handshake and a winning complexion. I return the handshake with a shy smile. "'Finally'?" I repeat to him, raising a slight brow.

"Yeah! Joe's told me about you, 'said you'd be shorter"

A sudden chuckle escapes me. Joe's my best friend and is part of the wardrobe team, of course he'd say something like that. "He's a dick.." I kid, shaking my head to myself. "You, on the other hand, are a fuckin' giant."

"Oh I know. I have to fuckin' duck down to get into any room upstairs. Tallhood ain't what its cut out to be" We both get a laugh out before Ted returns to setting up the cameras. I notice Tanner checking his phone again, visibly both anxious and frustrated.

"Man." Tanner speaks, seemingly thinking aloud. "Still nothing." "Isn't he the other lead?" Ted speaks as he moves to adjust the stand of one of the lights, glancing up through his round glasses. "I figured he'd be here first."

"He should've been here first." Tanner huffs, masking his clear frustration with a chuckle. "I-I don't know what I'm gonna do if he just doesn't show." "What would we have to do?" I tilt my head at Tanner, feeling a little anxious myself.

"I have no idea, honestly" Tanner responds, shaking his head. "At best, we'd have to find someone to take his place within the next, like, couple days. At worst, I'd have to cancel this whole thing."

I frown, trying to think of some helpful alternative in my head, but nothing comes up. I'd hate for everyone to have to go home, and getting the money back for the airbnb would be a hassle. We all pitched in for this place. As much as I've joked about it, it's pretty nice. 5 bedrooms, 3 bathrooms, half the place is a giant living room and there's even more outside. I'd hate to leave without getting to sleep in one of those giant beds. All I can do is hope for the best, I guess.

About an hour passes. At this point, everyone except Conner has shown up on set and most of us that will be on camera are fitted and ready. We had already read through the entire script together over Discord prior to getting here, so all we need to do is just start filming.

I'm refreshing my memory with the script when I hear a notification ping from Tanner's phone. It takes him less than a second to pick it up and look at the message, pausing to read it. I see his expression go from relief to uneasy, his thumbs tapping on his phone's keyboard louder than usual as he responds before setting his phone down and taking a deep breath.

"Conner can't make it."

Silence fills the room for a moment as everyone looks up from their tasks. I approach Tanner, script still on hand.

"What? What does he mean he can't make it?" I asked, honestly shocked with what I was hearing. "So, yknow how he's just...not been responding since we left?" Tanner asks, looking understandably annoyed.

"Yeah?"

"Apparently he ate some bad food last night and has been throwing up since 4am. We left at 5."

The only thing I can do is run my fingers through my hair in frustration. Dude probably ordered bad chicken or something. Of course. "So our main dude, THE male leading role or whatever, has food poisoning." I say that as a statement, but I'm honestly just so confused, I don't want to believe it. "What do we do now? Could we hire someone else in time?" "Even if we could, we wouldn't have time to get the chemistry built up between you two." Tanner shrugs. "There'd be no way of knowing if it'll work out."

"I'll do it."

Tanner and I turn our heads to Ted, who's joined in on the conversation shortly after assembling the last light. My first instinct is to let out a sigh of relief, but I steel myself, trying to really process what he's offering.

"You? You wanna be the male lead?" Tanner points at Ted, rather surprised he'd offer. Ted seemed to laugh at the expression on Tanner's face "What's that fuckin' look for? You think I can't be romantic, Tanner?" "No--" Tanner cackles, putting his palms up defensively as he laughed. "That's not it! I just-- you haven't read the script, and, yknow..." Tanner pauses, shrugging his shoulders and tilting his head in my direction. "You two just met, you'll have to, yknow--"

"'Yknow? Yknow?' I KNOW, Tanner. I. know." Ted begins to mock Tanner in a friendly manner while pointing at himself, his strong voice easily overpowering Tanner's timid tone. "I've been doin' this since you were in little baby diapers, alright? I can read the script, I can kiss the pretty lady, I got this!"

I suddenly feel a whole lot warmer, resisting the urge to put a hand to my cheek. I mean, I have blush on already, but now I'm definitely blushing. I'll have to kiss this guy?

I mean.

That ain't a bad thing.

That's a nice lookin' dude. I'd be blind not to see it.

But I did just meet him.

"I mean...." Tanner seems to be at a loss for words, glancing in my direction once more. I realize I've been one of the main talking pieces of this conversation, yet I haven't spoken a word. "Ah--I.." I stammer out what was meant to be a coherent response, realizing I'm a bit more sheepish about this than I thought I'd be. He called me pretty. I...don't know what to do with that. I can handle a compliment, sure, but this was...

"Hey, sorry, I don't wanna step over any lines..." Ted's smile faded after my lack of a response, resting his hands behind his back. "Oh no! I-I wouldn't mind it at all." I finally managed to speak up. I swear, I felt like a bashful damsel in those old transatlantic-accent films. "I mean, like, better this than sending everyone packing early, right?"

"Real flattering." Ted responded with a renewed smile and a chuckle, getting another sheepish blush from me. "Whatever works for everyone, I'm down for it."

Based on Tanner's knowing expression, I can tell he gathered something of use from whatever that exchange was. "I mean..." Tanner repeats again, as if to remind us he's also there with filler words before taking in a sharp breath of realization, or maybe it was one of acceptance, I couldn't tell. Either way, he had an idea. "OK, how about this: most of the crew didn't get breakfast on the way up here and we're all gettin' pretty hungry, we could use some caffeine. How about you two head back out and get everyone something from Dunkin' or wherever? Get talkin', see if it works."

"You setting us up on a breakfast run, or a date?" I collect myself fast enough to make a joke, actually getting a decent chuckle out of Ted. Part of me couldn't believe I had even made that joke aloud, I was also kind of genuinely asking. "I am testing the chemistry." Tanner clarified slowly with a half smile. "And I...don't want to do it myself."

Ted and I look at each other, giving me a brief moment to realize Ted's eyes are brown. Don't know why I've chosen to collect that information now. Just another observation I've made for the day.

...Man, I'm hungry.

"Alright, but I'm not driving your car." I agree with a shrug. "No need, I got my Tacoma." Ted responds, making a clicking noise with his mouth and gesturing me to follow him outside.

"You...have your city in Washington?" I ask genuinely, getting another laugh out of him, not intentionally this time. "Toyota Tacoma. My truck." He corrects me, guiding me to an old dark green pick-up truck. "I've had this baby since high school. Graduated with it."

"Ahh, your high school sweetheart. Lovely. Happy to meet her."

"Fuck off" Ted jokingly scoffs, hopping into the drivers seat. I have this big grin on my face as I get into the passenger side. He's giving me this...oddly comforting vibe. I can talk and joke with this guy so naturally, like I've known him for longer than an hour.

Somehow, I get the feeling we'll get along just fine, even if I'll end up having to kiss him once or twice this month....

....That's got me thinking, how many times am I kissing this guy again?

__________________________________

|| Chapter 2 || Chapter 3 || Chapter 4 || Chapter 5 || Chapter 6 (smut) || Chapter 7 || Chapter 8 || Chapter 9 || Chapter 10 (smut) || Chapter 11 || Chapter 12 || Chapter 13 || Chapter 14 (smut) || Chapter 15 || Chapter 16 || Chapter 17 || Chapter 18 (smut) || Chapter 19 ||

[midnight-mourning]

He’s a Little Confused but He's Got the Holiday Spirit

Hello! As the title implies, it's time for this to become a fic, for those that don't know, I wrote a prompt response that's basically a christmas au of confused spirit (curtosey of @divinit3a) and it was so good that I decided to make a full fic for it. this post contains the basic info of the fic, some lovely designs brought to life by Pom and will include links to each chapter as it posts ^_^

There's also a little poll at the end to vote on the title if you'd like to participate~

The Plot:

You're a blacksmith/animatronic technican in a small, mountain village, known far and wide across the kingdom for it's holiday decorations and delight. So much so that the royal family themselves visit yearly to partake in the festivities.

However, due to some recent threats and strange has happenings, there's much more security this year, and among that security is two royal guards who seem keenly interested in keeping you from investigating too far into the matter. And you, they're also interested in you.

The Characters:

Y/N - You! With the same personality, motivations, and goals as Y/N from Confused Spirit, and with a similar job as well. You run a shop in town with a small team of smithies, tinkerers, and inventors at your side. (I don't have a design currently but imagine a the most androgynous blacksmith/medival peasent outfit ever <33)

Sun & Moon - The two guards that have been meddling in your affairs. Though, given they've been a surprising help with your siblings, you can't say much. Also with the same personalities, and characteristics as Confused Spirit. However, they're motivations and goals are different and do not reflect their CS counterparts. Meaning, anything discovered about these two does not apply to or justify any actions taken by them in CS. Designs below are by Pom who brought my vision to life <3333

The Shop Crew - the parts & infastructure team from CS! with an adjustment here or there :)

Melissa & Gabriel - Your siblings. Still adorable. And still a menace.

All others - You'll just have to see :) There is some overlap from CS, such as Abby as some already know, among many more

Where to read:

I'll be posting these to tumblr & ao3! Tumblr first/only (until I can think up a title) but then I'll also have it on ao3 for better reading bc these will be long chapters.

Speaking of, there will be seven chapters total, including the one I've already posted!

Timeline:

Honestly want to tell y'all i'll be sharing a chapter every day or so, but after the disaster that was me last week with feeling unwell and getting behind, I'll just say, she'll be posted completely hopefully before my break is over 😅

Title (and tagging):

While I admit it WOULD be funny to just name it Holiday Spirit, I'm gonna let y'all decide for sure. I'll leave the poll up for a week since I'm not in a rush to post to ao3 (and I unfortunately doubt I'll have it done in a week lmao) everything related to it though will be tagged with #HS! au and #Holiday spirit au as the au is called Holiday Spirit, this is just for fun pretty much

Chapter 1:

Chapter 2:

https://www.tumblr.com/midnight-mourning/771893744939270144/2-animatronics-dancing-oh-and-you-youre-there?source=share (this is an inline link bc it KEEPS SHOWING SPOILERS)

EDIT: messed up the poll, so sorry >_< if you already voted and it said 1 day pls vote again shkjdf

Tag list for the usuals (if you would like added, see this post for more info):

@scarletcowboy @beemyhuneybee @fishm0ther @deviouscrackers @elsajoyagent8

@luckyyyduckyyy @zenkaiankoku @jogimote @local-shrub @amarynthian-chronicles

@robinette-green @everlightreader @sinister-sincerely @starredeclipse @dangerva

@juukai @crystalmagpie447 @mothgutz236 @lizyxml

[andreafmn]

Speak | Chapter 10

Word Count: 3.5K Story Description: Bella Swan was a disaster when Edward had left. Deciding she needed a little help, Charlie Swan receives with open arms his younger daughter (Y/N) Swan. She helps Bella during her depression and becomes inseparable from her long-lost friend Jacob. What she didn’t expect was falling for a hotheaded short-tempered silver wolf. Chapter: 10/? Warnings: emotional and mental abuse A/N: can't believe I finished this on schedule! the story everyone is obsessed with for some reason just got updated😂🤍 My content will always be free, but if you’re feeling particularly generous, you can leave a tip on any of my posts to support me and my love of writing or buy me a coffee TikTok • Instagram • Business | MASTERLIST If you’d like to be tagged in this or any other story: click here Make sure you have my notifications on so you know every time I post!  Taglists for Twilight get filled quick and Tumblr only lets me tag up to a certain point. Notifications are your best bet.

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Chapter 10

"Do you want to stay over tonight?" Jacob suddenly asked as the pair made their way to his truck. "It's already so late and I don't wanna make the drive back to Forks right now."

"Uh, sure, that sounds great," she said, trying to contain her excitement. A surge of happiness took over her as she witnessed Jake trying. He was trying to keep them together, at least that's what it looked like to her. "I'll just let dad know."

"Yeah, sure."

After she had settled on the center of the seat, Jacob helped his father into the truck, stepping out to say goodbye to his friends.

"I'll let you know that there won't be any funny business under my roof, (Y/N)," Billy smiled teasingly. "Though I am glad that Jacob is seemingly trying to turn over a new leaf this new year."

"I promise we'll do nothing but sleep, Billy," she chuckled. "And I also hope this is a new start for Jake and me. That everything that happened stays in the past and we can just give it our all in this relationship."

"If it is meant to be, (Y/N), the universe will find a way," he said as mystically as he always spoke. "You deserve happiness, my child."

"People keep saying that," she responded, her eyes growing far more interested in the skin of her fingers. "Does no one think that Jake can make me happy?"

"That's not what I'm saying, (Y/N)," he smiled, his hand falling on top of the one she was picking. "All I am saying is that if the love and happiness that you deserve is with Jacob, then the universe will allow it."

"And if not?"

"Then, your paths will always align."

"Then let's hope that what's written on the stars is in our favor." And as she said that she didn't know if she was wishing that to convince him or to convince herself.

The three of them rode back to the Black residence in a comfortable silence. The sounds of the woods and the whistling of the wind filled their quiet. She wondered what they said. If they whispered words of encouragement or if they taunted her downfall. She wanted to believe it was the former, because the latter would wreck her.

"Well, you two. I trust that you will behave yourselves since you're under my roof," Billy told them, eyeing the teenagers suspiciously. "And don't start getting used to these sleepovers. This is only because it's already two in the morning and we are all tired."

"Dad," Jacob grumbled. "Just go to bed already."

"Ooh, never thought I'd be shooed away in my own home," the man chuckled. "But I will leave you two. Not because you told me so, but because I am tired. Good night, kids."

"Night, dad."

"Good night, Billy."

Billy rolled away to his bedroom, turning in for the night. He left the couple standing in the living room, a heavy and tense air blowing between them. They had yet to acknowledge everything that had happened between them, much less finally putting it to rest.

"Uh, I'll get you some clothes and you can shower first if you want," Jacob mumbled as he walked into his room before coming out with a folded t-shirt and some sweatpants. "Might be a bit big on you, but it's better than nothing. There're extra towels under the sink."

"Sure," she smiled. "Thanks."

There was still remnant awkwardness between them as they tried to waltz around unspoken words. She locked herself in the bathroom, finally allowing herself to breathe. Fresh start is what she told herself. Over and over again she told herself that they were having a fresh start. As she showered and cleaned away Paul's touch and the thought of him, she had to believe it.

Jacob was who she had always wanted. The boy she had grown up with, the one she had never forgotten. Still, her mind wondered what would have happened if Paul had been the one she had met first. If he had been the boy that was in her mind for the almost sixteen years she had been alive. Maybe she would have been standing in his bathroom instead of Jake's. Maybe she would have been wearing his oversized t-shirt.

"Hey," Jacob called softly from the living room as she opened the bathroom door. "Come here."

(Y/N) walked down the hallway to where he was, a smile stretching on her face as she was met with what Jake had done while she showered.

He had pushed aside the wooden coffee table that lived between the sofas and placed in its stead plush blankets and pillows, a pair of hot chocolate mugs in front of the fireplace. His long, wet hair was plaited back, and he had changed into pajamas. And he was waiting for her.

"What's all this?" (Y/N) smiled.

"I think it's about time we put things to rest already, (Y/N)," he said, patting the pace in front of him. "I don't like fighting with you."

"I don't like it either," she sighed contentedly as she sank into the warmth of his body, his arms wrapping around her. "I like things when they're like this. When we're together and happy."

"I know, and I want it to be like this all the time. But it can't be when I hear you're running around with Paul," he reminded her. His tone was soft, but his words were as snipping as a snake's bite. "I just can't stand the guy and it's embarrassing when it happens in front of the town."

"Jake, I..."

"Don't worry, baby, that's all in the past. As long as you promise not to see him again, (Y/N). I don't want you to fall into his trap."

(Y/N) couldn't remain quiet for long. She knew it would only work to anger him. But how could she promise something she didn't want to do? Something that her gut told her was wrong. "Of course," she lied. "I promise. Paul is a thing from the past."

"That's what I like to hear," he smiled before he turned her head to kiss her. "We need to focus more on us. Focus on our relationship."

"I would love that," she beamed. "I want this to work, Jake. I want us to work."

"Then let's," he smirked.

Jake attached his mouth to her neck, nipping at a spot that took her breath away. His hand held her head back, gripping her jaw. He took in her scent, the warmth of her skin, the sounds from her mouth. All as he imagined...

"Stop, Jake," she said, her voice treading between a moan and a chuckle. "Your dad is literally down the hall."

"He's a heavy sleeper," he chuckled against her skin. "He'll never know."

"No, Jake." She separated from him; a playful grin splayed on her mouth as she turned to face him. "Not here. Not now."

"Ugh, fine," he groaned, falling on his back. "Then, I guess we'll just sleep."

"Yes," she mused, crawling over his body and planting a soft kiss on his lips. "But together."

Jacob wrapped his arms around her and chuckled, positioning both of them comfortably on a blanket and draping another over them. Her body curled into his, his arms wrapped around her waist as he spooned her.

"We'll have to talk about taking things to the next level," he said against her ear, his breath tickling her skin. "I think it might cement everything between us."

"And I think you need to take a breather, Jacob," she chuckled. "We just got to a good place. Let's take things as they go."

"Ugh, fine," he muttered jokingly. "Then, let's just go to sleep."

"Alright, Jake. Good night."

"Night, (Y/N)."

If every night after was like this one, maybe it was the universe's way of telling her that Jake was the one. Laying there, wrapped in his arms, she could let herself believe that the tides were changing. That at the end of the day, Jacob would choose her. Maybe, just maybe.

***

"I can't believe she went home with him," Paul groaned, punching a nearby tree. The way the bark splintered helped ease his anger for a second, but the burning pain inside his chest remained. "I don't know what else I can do to make her understand what a shitty guy he is."

"You know there is," Jared teased. "You could always tell her how you feel and why."

Paul's stoic stare was clear even in the darkness of the night. He knew Jared was right. The more he pursued her without telling her the reason why, the harder it would be to explain his behavior. "You know I can't, dude," he grumbled. "I don't wanna put her in the middle of all of this bull."

"It's not that bad, man," the boy offered. "Look at me and Kim. She knows and nothing has happened to her."

"Yeah, she also liked you before you were a shapeshifting freak," he joked. "And look at Emily. She's forever scarred because didn't have a grasp on what was happening."

"Come on, you know that was an exception, Paul. What happened to her was a very unfortunate accident. But an accident, nonetheless. There's really no reason for you to be running from (Y/N)."

"Look how much shit happened to Bella in so little time, Jared. And it all started when she found out the truth about the Cullens," Paul said. "I don't know what I would do if I made (Y/N) go through any of that because of what I am."

"So you're gonna continue brooding and make our lives miserable? Just tell her, man. Maybe she'll fall in love with you and turn that frown upside down."

Paul picked up a stick and threw it at Jared's head, laughing as the other boy tried to duck but failed to; the piece of wood bouncing off his forehead. "You'll have to put up with me for a lot longer then," he laughed, swallowing the sadness that threatened to overtake him. "I just don't think I have it in me to do that to her. She deserves to be safe and happy."

"Even if it's with Jacob?"

"Unfortunately, that decision is hers to make," he sighed. "I just wish she didn't have to get hurt in the process."

Jared remained quiet for a second. He stared as his pack brother paced before him, his mind too quiet aside for the sporadic image of (Y/N). But even if he didn't say it, he could feel Paul's sadness. He could feel the tug in his chest that called him to go to her. He had felt it too. Every time Kim had to go to a family dinner or visit family out of state, he felt like someone had taken his heart off his chest and sent it away.

But (Y/N) was so close. All he had to do was have one tough conversation and he could soften the grasp of the claws that covered his heart. "What are you so afraid of, Paul?" Jared finally said. "I know you say you don't want to hurt her and all that, but there's something else. Isn't there?"

Paul stared at his friend, wondering if he was that transparent. "I've never been a, uh, a relationship guy. Haven't had the best role models," he confessed. "I guess I think that if I let myself get close to her, I won't be able to handle when she inevitably goes. Because at the end of the day, everyone leaves."

"Not everyone, Paul. We're still here."

"Because you have to be," he shrugged. "If you had the chance to go, you would take it. And don't try denying it."

"Come on, man. You're my friend. More than that, you're my brother," Jared reassured. "But, sure, if I had the chance to leave the rez one day, I would take it. But that doesn't mean I would leave my friends behind. Much less, family."

"Jared, we wouldn't have even spoken to each other had it not been because of the shift. I'm not that delusional to think otherwise."

"Regardless of how or why it happened, life brought us together, Paul. And whether you like it or not, you're my brother now," the boy smiled, draping his arm over Paul's shoulders. "Now, you need to let that girl prove that she would stick by you as well. And it starts by having that difficult conversation you're so scared to have. She's desperate for a reason, dude. All you have to do is tell her."

"She's going to think I'm crazy, J. That I'm making up stories to get her away from Jake," Paul whined. "Why would she believe that there are shapeshifting wolves roaming around the reservation protecting humans from threats? And what if she goes to her sister with the story? Then Bella will know about vampires and shapeshifters, and it'll just add more shit on top of the mess we're dealing with."

"How about you stop overthinking yourself into the ground and finally grow some balls?" Jared teased. "Don't think of what might happen and live in the moment. I know last year's Paul would've had the courage to ask her out. Jacob or no Jacob."

"I technically already asked her out once, and it ended up with me, by myself, in the diner," he reminded his friend, red flooding his cheeks as he recalled the embarrassing moment. "This is not just about inviting the prettiest girl in school to the prom. This is about telling someone that everything they had believed is not real. It's telling her that it doesn't matter what she might have wanted, that something out in the universe decided that we are bonded for life. It's telling a girl like her that she's stuck with a guy like me."

"Man, I can't keep trying to convince you that you are a good guy," Jared sighed. "I'm not saying you're the gods' gift to mankind. Certainly not the you from a year ago. But you're not that guy anymore. You're not even the same guy from six months ago. So, it's time to pick yourself up and do what you have to do. Stop moping about this and do something."

***

(Y/N) woke up with warm arms wrapped around her and a pang in her chest she didn't understand. She was supposed to feel happy. She was supposed to wake up that New Year's Day with an overwhelming amount of joy and the sense that things were finally on the right path. Instead, there was an aching void in her heart that was trying to eat at her insides.

It was the same void that had started festering since that fateful night at the bonfire. The one that seemed to calm whenever the fluke was around. The one that called out his name and she had let go on deaf ears.

That pang filled her with guilt. As she lay in Jacob's arms, she felt guilty that her head was thinking of another guy. And it was a guy she barely knew. A boy that she had no business thinking about, much less dreaming about.

But she couldn't help it. She couldn't forget the softness of his hands against her skin, the brightness of his smile as he looked at her, the glimmer in his eyes when he listened to her. She couldn't get him out of her head.

And as if by divine intervention, the very constant thought appeared in Jacob's window. He knocked softly, motioning for her to go outside. (Y/N) couldn't believe he was there, much less that Jacob had yet to wake up. But what was harder to fathom was the fact that she was tiptoeing to the front door dragging a blanket with her.

"What are you doing here, Paul?" (Y/N) said as she closed the door behind her, wrapping the fabric tighter around her body. "If Jacob sees you here, he'll kill you."

"I thought I was supposed to be playing nice with him," he grinned teasingly. "What if I was here to extend a truce?"

"It wouldn't have mattered because he made me promise him that I wouldn't see you again," she whispered. "So, imagine what he will do if he sees you here right now."

"And did you?"

"What? Did I what?"

"Did you promise him, (Y/N)?" Paul asked sadly. "Is this your way of telling me that you're cutting ties with me?"

"No, of course not," she quickly replied. "I mean, I did promise him. But I never intended to keep it. I would just find a way to keep you two separate."

"So, what? I'd just be your dirty little secret?" he replied, anger clear in his tone. "Yeah, no, thanks. I'd rather take my chances with other friendships."

"What did you want me to say, Paul? Did you want me to tell my jealous boyfriend that I wanted to maintain a friendship with the one guy he seems to despise more than anything?" (Y/N) spoke through gritted teeth. "Would you have wanted me to tell Jake that I wanted to spend time with a guy he was close to dragging into the middle of town and beating the living daylights out of him? Sure, that would have ended great for me."

"Why would you wanna be with a guy like that, (Y/N)? If you're that afraid of his reaction over something as small as a friendship, what do you think will happen if something bigger happens?"

"He only reacts that way with you, and I don't get why," she sighed. "And I wanna be with him because I... because... because I..."

"Why, (Y/N)? Tell me!"

"Because I love him, Paul," she cried, shame cracking her voice. "I've been waiting for this chance for the better part of my life. I've been in love with him for as long as I've known what it was. And he wants me back, Paul. He wants me. And I'm not giving up at the first sign of hardship. So, if you really want to be my friend then you're gonna have to live with that."

"What if I don't?" Paul grumbled, his voice low and hurt. He got closer to her. So close she could feel how warm his body was, even through the blanket. "What if I can't stand around and watch as he mistreats you? Someone that loves you would never treat you like that."

"Don't make this harder than it already is, Paul," she whispered, warm tears falling down her cheeks. "For some reason I want you in my life. But I won't screw up what I just started with Jacob for a friend."

"I just don't wanna see you like this," he said, wiping away the tears with the pad of his thumbs. "You deserve to be happy, but not when it has rules and regulations like this. You should be allowed to still be yourself when you're in a relationship."

"Paul..."

"Listen, (Y/N)," he sighed. "I can't tell you what to do, nor would I want to. But I can't just watch in the sidelines as he treats you like shit when you deserve someone that will worship the ground you walk on."

"What are you saying, Paul?" (Y/N) croaked. "Are you saying you won't be my friend if I stay with Jacob?"

"(Y/N), I'm saying that I won't keep quiet if he keeps mistreating you."

"He doesn't," she said, but she knew it wasn't convincing. She didn't even believe it herself. "He just... he's just passionate, I guess."

"Then can you promise me something?" Paul sighed, his eyes glossing with tears. "If he ever –and I mean ever—gets physical with you, even as much as lifts his hand at you, you will tell me. The second it happens, you call me."

"I don't think it'll come to that," she forced a smile. "He would never put his hands on me."

"Just, please, (Y/N). Promise me and don't lie to me."

"Alright," she said, looking straight into the brown of his eyes. "I promise, Paul."

"I'll make sure you're always safe," he promised. His hand had not fallen from her face, his thumb caressing over her cheekbone. "No one is going to hurt you, (Y/N)."

(Y/N) had no idea why, but she believed every word he said. So, she promised. And, unlike with Jacob, she intended to keep it.

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[clawbehavior]

Continue the story: The Devil Judge/Gahan edition

Fellow fandom folks,

We're doing a collaborative fic on A03 for The Devil Judge and Yohan/Gaon and we'd love for you to join. Here's how it works: each person writes one chapter of the story based on a topic we all voted on. You can write whatever you want in your chapter as long as it connects to chapters before it. This is a nice way to close out the third rewatch, get your creative writing juices flowing in a low-stress place, try your hand at writing if you're new, and importantly, celebrate jinyoung's impending return from the military on November 4th!! If 8 people or more join, we'll be writing until then!

How to join: Reblog or comment here if you want to write a chapter with us! Make sure to sign up by Thursday, September 5 if you want to write!!

Vote here: Answer this poll to vote on what our story will be about. Feel free to suggest other ideas. The topic with the most votes will get selected.

Writing logistics: After everyone signs up, I’ll put our names in a random generator to pick the order of writers.

How it works:

Publishing: You’ll have 1 week to read what’s been written so far and write your chapter. Chapters are due by Thursdays at 9 AM KST. I'll post a schedule.

Word count: Minimum of 2 sentences and not more than 500 words. This is a loose word count specifically to keep it chill. Don’t stress about making your chapter perfect. The idea is to have fun, go with the flow, and write whatever comes to you!

Posting on ao3: We’ll post the fic as one story with multiple authors. I’ll help you out when it’s your turn to add your chapter.

Keeping in touch: We can use a Tumblr post to brainstorm ideas and talk story stuff, or, if enough people are interested, I can set up a discord to chat

The goal is to have a good time and see where everyone’s creativity takes them.

Reblogging anyone I can think of to increase reach but obvs don't feel compelled to join if you're unable to. Please share so we can include everyone who's interested!!

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[laurfilijames]

Hiya everyone,

I wanted to give an update since I've been absent for the past few weeks and some people have been checking in and asking how I am (thank you 💗).

I'm… okay?

To be totally transparent here without dragging this out; Tumblr has become a space I haven't been enjoying recently and it's taken a while, and a bit of a hiatus, to really come to terms with accepting that.

There's a song I've been listening to that I feel has really supported and inspired my feelings toward all of this, whose lyrics hit home and have allowed me to really think about what my plans are and almost give me a sense of bravery to do this.

I'm not upset or angry, but have found a sense of peace in this I was afraid to explore for so long.

No one thing has caused this to happen, rather a steady accumulation of things that have brought me to where I am now.

Took a long time, but I learned

There's two kinds of people, one is a giver

And one's always tryin' to take

All they can take

So I'm sayin' goodbye to the people

That I feel are real good at wastin' my time

No regrets, baby, I just think that maybe

You go your way and I'll go mine

It's been a real good time

But you got dark energy, somethin' I can't unsee

And I've got to take care of myself

I found a deeper well

It's natural when things lose their shine

So other things can glow

There are a lot of things in my life that better deserve my time and energy and right now that needs to be my focus.

My intention is to finish Breathe and post the last chapter, but once that is done, I’m fairly confident that my time here will be too.

I will still be writing, but will be keeping my work to myself.

The decision to deactivate or not is still up in the air, and one I will decide later, though the thought of wiping everything out is not something I'm too keen on as I don't know if this will be a permanent leave and might feel like returning one day.

Thank you to everyone who has supported me, befriended me, and loved the stories I've written. Your company, kindness, and common interests are something I keep fond in my heart and will look back on warmly.

It's not goodbye yet, and in the meantime I'll be trying my best to work hard on Chapter 12 of Breathe and get it out to you, but until then, be well and be kind. 💗

[noxiatoxia]

Sorry for the jankiness in this, I had to control both my Vita and PC at the same time, but here is a comparison! On the left, my fantranslation, and on the right, the official translation.

If you're wondering what this is all about, I'm working on a patch (at least of the prologue, I cannot promise the whole game) of SDR2, that aims to provide a more accurate experience than the official English translation.

More accurate how? Danganronpa not only suffers from a lot of mistranslations, but a handful of clunky dialogue and very literal translation choices that sacrifice nuance and an accurate experience for the sake of keeping the literal text. I want this patch to:

Fix all the mistranslations.

Add back in character accents, speech pattern quirks, and more accurately represent how they talk.

Fix the dialogue to sound more natural in English, as if these could be actual words spoken aloud (for the most part).

Give English players a version of the came that focuses more on capturing the spirit, energy, and emotion of the original dialogue than heavily focusing on providing the most literally accurate translation.

More on all these points under the cut.

What about other fantranslations? (orenronen, etc) I have not seen every conceivable English fan translation for SDR2, but a big one is orenronen's on SomethingAwful. It was never finished past chapter 3, but still stands as probably the most popular fan translation. Orenronen's work is extremely impressive given the speed and quality of the translations. That said, it is not without its mistakes, and I think suffers from perhaps taking too many liberties. I'm hoping my patch can strike a good balance between his and the official translation to deliver the most authentic experience possible.

So is this SDR2 "definitive" edition? Not exactly, I'll explain under the cut.

Big changes in this clip:

Added back in Souda's accent along with changing his name back. Tanaka's talent was also changed.

There is a joke that both I and the original English translation had to change as no English player would get it. You can read more about it in this post I made. (along with Jum-P being changed from Golden Hawk to Golden Eagle)

Komaeda speaks of Tanaka's time in the breeding/animal club, but as far as I'm aware, this is not a thing in many Western schools. The main gist of the text is Tanaka is amazing with breeding animals. The fact it was a club is irrelevant to the meaning, other than providing that he is a high schooler (which we already knew), so I cut it out to be more understandable to most English players.

Tanaka adds the part on about his hamsters not going easy on their enemies himself, the hamster doesn't say that. Kept the Hulk reference as it's a pretty apt translation and makes up for the missed reference from earlier. However I'm thinking of maybe changing the line afterwards to "they are not used to holding back" as that would be more accurate.

If you're interested in the details of this patch, please read below! I want this to be made for the fans by the fans, so any input is welcomed. If you have suggestions for how to improve text to flow better in English, or wish to correct/inquire about translation choices of mine, I more than welcome it. No matter how big or small, I want everyone to give their feedback and opinions and suggestions.

If you are interested in helping in the translation, be it from the perspective of a Japanese speaker, a play tester, or want to offer general writing/wording advice and feedback, please DM me. While I don't plan to form a team (I prefer to work alone), projects like this benefit greatly from opinions and feedback. Especially if you are familiar with both the official English and orenronen's version, I would appreciate your help. If a good number of people seem interested in helping, I may form a Discord or Tumblr community to facilitate discussion easier.

Welcome to under the cut. So, let's talk about that earlier point about definitive edition.

The thing is, save mistranslations, NISA (the official translation) and orenronen's versions of SDR2 are equally correct in some manner. NISA took a more literal approach to each sentence, while orenronen took more liberal approaches, instead going off what would sound best/fitting. Neither of these are incorrect. There is no "definitive" translation for any media in any language, but speaking from the perspective of Japanese -> English, there is rarely ever an exact way to be 1:1.

Let's take an example. The word "usagi" means "rabbit"...but it also means "bunny" and "hare". These are all relatively the same thing to the layman, but they impart different nuances. A character who chooses to only say "rabbit" instead of "bunny" may sound more intelligent or old-timey. So, how do you know which one to choose when it could be any 3? That's a very simplified version of the kind of choices you have to make in translation. When it comes to sentences that get longer and have more nuance even in the original Japanese language, you suddenly have a whole new beast to deal with.

You may have heard the common joke of "inexperienced translators" who translate the phrase "しょうがない" as "it can't be helped". Most English dictionaries will tell you this is what the phrase means, and yes, it is used in such a manner, but the fact is, most people do not say "it can't be helped". "I can't help but [...]" is much more common, but the standalone phrase is usually "it is what it is" or "that's just how things are", etc.

The phrase itself literally translates as "there is no method".

So, we have three versions of this phrase. The literal translation, the widely-posited English dictionary translation, and a naturalized version that is not literal to the actual Japanese word, but is an "equivalent" to what people would say in English. Which of these is more correct? Really...none of them. There is no more correct answer, just what sounds better or fits better.

This is all to say, my translation is going to be me doing the very, upmost best I can do to capture the meaning and nuance in all the words said, but also making it sound good and natural in English. This will inevitably include changing very cultural-specific things that English players wouldn't get, e.g. the Mutsugorou Kingdom joke Komaeda makes. As an English translation, I feel it is most important to naturalize it for an English audience. That is the whole point of translating from one language into another.

Above all, I will be honoring the feeling and meaning of the text rather than the literal words like NISA did. In other words, I would personally go with "it is what it is".

Keep in mind I am also one guy. I am not perfect in either language. Even people who speak English or Japanese as their first language make mistakes in them still, and translation only increases that chance. That's why extra eyes on this project helps. I do feel like I am a little out of my league, but at the end of the day, I'm doing this out of passion and fun. The official translation will still exist even if I make my own, so if anything, I'm hoping it provides a different experience that can help people grasp a closer meaning to the Japanese text.

Okay, let's get to the game stuff. Firstly, as you've seen, changes will be made to Character names/talents.

Ultimate Breeder -> Ultimate Animal Breeder. As funny as the implications are, his title was never meant to be confusing or ambiguous in the Japanese version.

Ultimate Musician -> Ultimate Pop Rock Musician. Mioda's title in the Japanese version is actually "Ultimate K-On Club Member", but was changed since most English players don't know what K-On is. It is most comparable to Pop Rock in terms of sound.

Soda Kazuichi -> Souda Kazuichi.

Kuzuryu Fuyuhiko -> Kuzuryuu Fuyuhiko.

Kirigiri Kyoko -> Kirigiri Kyouko.

A vote was held to keep Tanaka Gundham instead of Gundam or Gandamu (but this is subject to change depending on opinions I hear from others. His name is supposed to be a Gundam reference). A vote was also held to keep Hinata Hajime instead of Hazime.

Character Accents: As is with these types of games, the point is to have zany, eccentric characters who talk in zany, eccentric ways. Danganronpa is extremely hit or miss when it comes to carrying over these quirks. For the rest of this post I'll just be talking about SDR2 of course, but basically everything I say applies to the other Dangan games as well.

Some characters have their accents kept, at least in part, while others are just ignored. For example, Souda and Owari's accents were only sometimes kept, or watered down, while Usami's accent was removed entirely.

Speech quirks: This is largely context based. A cutesy girl using ね excessively comes off differently than a typical teenage boy using ね excessively, and will be translated differently...at least, that's how I view it. For the girl, I may make her speech more bubbly, cute, and appealing. For the boy, I would akin it more to going "like" or "um" a lot. Of course, if the boy is going for a cutesy image, or the girl is supposed to be mature, then I would flip this around. Like I said, this part depends 100% on context for each line.

Accurate representation: This one is a lot...but I'll try to boil it down. Japanese has several was to say "I" and "You"; different words and different ways to write those words. In fiction, this is usually a vehicle to tell you about the character's personality.

For example, among boys, it is common they will either use "boku" or "ore". "boku" is generally more polite than "ore".

However, there's multiple ways to write "ore". Hiragana, Katakana, or Kanji. The way it is written imparts a different impression. Hinata, for example, uses ore, kanji (俺) to refer to himself. Souda uses ore, katakana (オレ) to refer to himself. While this gives them both the impression of being masculine & impolite, Hinata using kanji gives the added impression of him being more intelligent and calm, while for Souda, katakana gives the impression of him being more abrasive and eccentric.

The meaning of what script is used also changes depending on context.

For example, for "you", both Hanamura and Komaeda use "kimi", which is a soft, friendly way to say "you" among friends. (Although, this is speaking strictly from the standpoint of fiction. You rarely use "you" in real Japanese. Anime characters do it all the time though, so it doesn't really count as "rude" by itself.)

However, Hanamura uses kimi, kanji (君) while Komaeda uses kimi, katakana (キミ). This both gives them the impression of being open and friendly, but for Hanamura, speaking with kanji makes it seem like he's being more proper and refined, and with Komaeda, speaking in katakana makes it seems like he's being more casual and laid back.

And then there are very unique "I" and "You" pronouns. Tanaka uses "ore-sama" (俺様) which sounds like he is saying "the great and amazing me", basically.

Ibuki says her own name, but this got translated poorly. Saying your own name as a first person pronoun, while not common, is more common in Japanese than English. Especially by kids and teen girls, it's seen as a cutesy thing. But it doesn't really come across like that in English. I will likely get rid of Mioda speaking in third person altogether, instead trying to incorporate this manner of speech into other forms, as it comes down to Mioda simply acting cute and eccentric. I think a good alternative is for her to occasionally speak of herself by saying "we" or "us", as that is not uncommon in English.

Similarly, Usami/Monomi talk with a cutesy ending. -desu becomes dechu, -masu becomes machu... "chu" is a very cute sound in Japanese, and it's supposed to drive home Usami's personality. I see this get translated as UwU speak a lot, which isn't incorrect, and in fact is a better translation than doing nothing like NISA did, but she does not speak with a speech impediment. It is only her endings that are modified. Me, personally, I will reword Usami to speak in a more simple, cute manner like a child show's protagonist, like Dora. I will also change some words to be cuter, like everybody -> everybunny, and you -> chu, but she will still speak normally.

And sometimes, pronouns change. Hinata uses omae (お前) to refer to other people, but for Monokuma, he's used omae (オマエ) before, changing the script to reflect his animosity.

This isn't even getting into honorifics or keigo. Honorifics (like -san, -kun, or no honorifics at all) reflect how respectful a character is of other characters. Similarly, "keigo", being often referred to as "polite speech", is commonly denoted by if a sentence ends in "-desu or -masu". Not speaking keigo in the situation these characters are in is a bit of a toss up. I wouldn't say it's automatically rude given they are all of the same age and status, and classmates don't always speak that way to each other either, but I would personally think most would approach this situation being polite when they're strangers.

There are also particles, some of which are more rude/masculine than other equivalent particles, or imperative speech, which is extremely rude (and not really ever used in real life).

On a politeness scale, for example...

Tsumiki uses keigo and uses -san for everyone, boys and girls. In the context of the rest of the cast, this sounds like she's speaking extremely politely and formally.

Komaeda does not use keigo but uses -san for girls and -kun for boys. He also uses "regular" particles. In context, this seems like he is speaking casually. Not rude, but not formal.

Hinata does not use keigo and does not use honorifics. He uses very masculine particles and is prone to using imperative form. In context, this seems like he is speaking extremely rudely.

Of course, NISA's version of SDR2 translates everything the same mostly since they go for a very literal approach, meaning these things that can't be translated into English all get translated the same, which is a shame. A lot is lost about how these characters speak and interact with the world. Specifically, Hinata suffers the most. Not just from stiff dialogue, but from getting his rude speech cut down immensely. The official art book for SDR2 claims that part of the design philosophy for Hinata was wanting to make a protagonist who was very masculine and direct. I want to keep that spirit in this patch, factoring in Hinata's choice in speech to influence how things get worded in English. While a sentence like なんだそれ！？Literally translates as "What is that!?", I would write it differently depending on the character after factoring in accent and everything we just talked about. "What the heck is that!?" for Souda, and "What the hell is that!?" (or even replacing hell with fuck in a tense situation) for Hinata, for example. For Komaeda, "What on earth is that!?" etc...

I think those are all the big points...if you've read this far, thank you :]

[jscwrites]

Please Follow this Backup Blog for Vendetta-IF

Hey guys, it's jsc, the author of Vendetta. I'm making this blog to backup all of the stuff I've posted over on the vendetta-if blog because I can't access my main account. Until I can access my account again, this will be the blog I'll use to interact with all of you and post updates. And in the worst case scenario, this will become the main blog.

So, please, follow this blog as I will be posting updates and answering asks like usual here. Also, for those who want to share their fanarts and other fanworks, please tag this blog too so I can see it. I'll also start reblogging some posts and asks from the Vendetta blog here in hopes of preserving them as much as I can. So, be prepared for a little blast from the past as we walk down the nostalgia road, I suppose.

I'm really sad because just earlier today, I checked my followers count and saw that we were 30 followers away from reaching 4K Followers in the main Vendetta blog, and I was thinking about what to do to celebrate it. Plus, there are also so many awesome fanarts and asks that I don't want to just be gone, which is why I'm making this blog to reblog all of them.

For those who are new and wondering what my story is all about, please check out the intro post I've reblogged. I might need to make another intro post in the future if I never get access back to my account, but for now, I hope it'll suffice.

IMPORTANT LINKS

[ORIGINAL INTRO POST]

[VENDETTA BLOG ARCHIVE]

[DEMO | Latest Chapter: 6 Part 1 | 272.8K words total] 

[FORUM] 

[PATREON] | [KO-FI]

[DISCORD]

CHARACTER RELATED MASTERPOSTS:

[CHARACTERS LIST]

[ARTBREEDER PORTRAITS] [ROs] [Other Pt. 1] [Viktor] [Other Pt. 2]

[CHARACTER PLAYLIST]

ADDITIONAL LINKS

[PUBLIC SIDE STORIES LIST]

[AO3 WRITTEN FANWORK] -> Currently 3 works

For those who are interested in what happened, I'll tell the details under the cut.

So, a few hours ago, I decided to open my iOS Tumblr app to check on notifications and stuff, as I usually do. But instead, I got hit with the Tumblr error messages over and over as it keeps trying to load in.

At first, I just thought it was my cellphone Internet connection, so I tried logging in on the desktop. At first, after I input all of my login credentials, the page loaded, but it brought me to the viewing page of my Vendetta blog as a non-user. I tried again, and this time, it said that my account got terminated. I never got any email from Tumblr about this, and it came as a shock because I just used my Tumblr earlier today to reblog some fanarts with no problem and I have never really used my account for other non-IF related stuff.

So, I scrambled to ask my members in Discord whether my Vendetta blog is still up, and thankfully it still is. But, my main account is somehow gone. The problem is, my Vendetta blog is actually a sideblog to my main account, jsclarissa.

As you can see here, when I tried searching for my main account, it says "Ghost blog! This blog does not exist." despite me having used that account to respond to comments and send asks to other authors before.

I have sent a support ticket to Tumblr support and also tweeted them on Twitter. I really hope they can give me my account back as I'm pretty sure this is some kind of technical issues on their end. I'm just worried about how long it would take them to respond and of course, the worst case scenario that it actually got terminated, so, I'm making this account.

Even if I got my account back, I'll still reblog stuff from the main blog here and maybe I can finally have a more personal blog where I can talk about stuff that is not really related to Vendetta.

[fushiglow]

How's it gloing?

I haven't spent much time on here recently, so I thought I'd check in with you guys! I don't tend to speak about my personal life online, because I don't really want to. However, I've received a few messages that seem easier to answer with a little (long) update.

In short, if you ever want to know how I'm doing, simply check how long it's been since my last update to Over the Threshold! We're currently approaching three months between chapters so ✨ yeah ✨

Work got Very Bad™ to the point that I had to take time off with stress. They hired a consultant to help me with my "ADHD specific struggles", only for the consultant to turn around and say "yeah, the issue isn't with the employee, no one can do all that". wbk.

Employers are at least trying to take appropriate action but the transition period is rough. I fully burnt out, so easing back into my responsibilities without getting frustrated and self-conscious about how little I can now manage each day is hard. Of course, mum has been undergoing cancer treatment throughout all of this too. Though the worst is (hopefully) behind us now, it's been rough, pals!

I'm doing my best with Over the Threshold, but that story is a different beast. I try to follow the inspiration wherever it takes me, because I've never found forcing it to be helpful, but I really want to move forwards with this fic now! I'm determined to make some significant progress once chapter 12 (the biggest problem chapter yet) is out of the way, so wish me luck!

It also hasn't helped that my special interest series came to an end rather unexpectedly during this time. As embarrassing as it feels to admit it, I've spent quite a bit of time grieving the end of JJK. I found my feet in the fandom here on Tumblr, and I'm sad knowing it'll never be the same space now it's over. Without the yapping and theorising and nerding out, I'm not sure how to make use of this place really, but while BlueSky seems promising, I miss Tumblr a lot. I really want to spend more time here again, so I think it's time to dust off the old queue. Reckon I've got stuff from last December sitting in there!

I know I've left a lot of people hanging in this time, and I'm genuinely sorry for that. However, I've been preserving every last drop of energy for the thing that gives me most joy: writing. My fics have brought many wonderful friendships my way, and I'll never stop being grateful for that, but trying to keep on top of all the different things demanding my attention is a huge part of the reason I burnt out.

At the end of the day, I'm here to create first and foremost, and I have to prioritise that for my own wellbeing. I really hope you understand ♥️

Okay, enough of that! Let's end on something less serious! A lot of the content I used to create here is no longer viable or appealing, so aside from unwanted yapping about my own writing, I'm not sure what to post about! Is there anything you'd like to see from me on Tumblr specifically? And last but certainly not least, how are you?

A reminder that my asks are always open — love you guys!

[smolwritingchick]

The Bangtan Gal Chapter 94- MAMA Awards 2016 Part 1

Summary: BTS win their first Daesang! Tensions run high when Jen's friendship with Hyuna ends abruptly due to sneak dissing and a scrapped performance. BTS attends the Mama Awards making iconic moments that leave the world shooked.

Words: 13,000+

Genre: Big Jungkook Fluff. A little chaos never hurt anybody :)

Click here for PART 2 of this chapter

Author's note: OK the 3rd Muster chapter isn't done yet, I'll post that next since this was done. The 3rd Muster chapter is basically a filler chapter anyway. So once I come back from taking a smol break I will start writing that and then the following story chapter. This was done and I didn't want to keep it waiting. Kind of been anxious to release it. 

As I addressed during the Bon Voyage season 1 chapter, this should be the last time I write about Hyuna. This idea came up recently and I rolled with it. My ideas changed a bit but I wanted this to just be chaotic af. I wanted to think outside the box and I like what I came up with. Again this smol girl ain't that much of a lyric writer but A for effort. Decided to combine the chapters and make it into the Mama Awards chapter.

I would like Jennie to always have a cool stage for the MAMA Awards. And have fun moments. It's only 2016 in the story and Jennie still has a lot of growing to do but I think this moment I have planned for this chapter is an interesting start to how she speaks up for herself. We got 2017, 18, 19, and the rest of the years for even more character development, wins and failures along the way for her.

Hope you enjoy it! I'd say Beyonce's 7/11 is the inspiration for her stage at MAMA. I love the song so much and the instrumental. Especially the Coachella version. Always a banger. I also loveeee Beyonce's laugh at the end of the Coachella version. So I had to add it for Jennie. It might just be her signature. 

Whenever there are scenes with BlackPink and BTS' Jennie (My character), I'm going to keep BlackPink's Jennie as Jennie during the dialogue while BTS' Jennie will just be called Jen. Hope that won't be too confusing.

Throwback to this funny video when they won at MMA 2016. I remember this video like it was yesterday. Timeless. As I continue to write, I get a little emotional. It was so fun seeing all this in real time.

Again this chapter is split into two parts because I couldn't fit all of it in one post. So this is part one.

Have an awesome day! Super excited for Jin to return from enlistment! Not much longer now!

------------

'BREAKING! MAMA 2016 Collaboration with Cube's Hyuna and Big Hit's Jennie scrapped!'

Jennie frowned at the article as she sat by her desk in the Smartie Factory. It was crazy how things abruptly changed. Lately, Jennie and Hyuna weren't on speaking terms and issues have been occurring for a while.

It all started with the sneak dissing that Jennie had found out on her Tumblr. She loved scrolling through the tag of her name and came across a fairly popular post regarding Hyuna attending a few variety shows and interviews.

"Unlike the others, I don't need to repeatedly say I'm the best from head to toe. You already see it," made ARMY think about Jennie's War of Hormone lyrics.

"Some rookies can be a bit much. Some like to try to overshine a veteran,"

"Some girls in this industry are a bit too fragile. I don't need to call myself bulletproof,"

"You mean the original version of How's This,"

These were just a handful of statements said by Hyuna and ARMY immediately speculated she was throwing shade at Jennie.

'Uhhhh did Hyuna just sneak diss, Jennie? Am I freaking out over nothing? That bulletproof and glass line was SUS,' one comment said.

ARMY went on to do more research and they immediately figured out that there was some sort of animosity in Hyuna's words and it caused confusion in the fandom.

"The hell...?" Miss Bangtan murmured as she read about it and even saw her and Hyuna trending on Twitter.

Her stomach dropped and she felt hurt by the words. It confused her as to why she would say these things. Deciding to go straight to the source, she messaged Hyuna on KakaoTalk.

Jen: Ummmm what's going on sis? We got a problem or something? If so let's address it now. Call me when you're free

But hours later, still no reply. What officially solidified the fact that there was an issue was when Jennie facetimed Hayoon about it.

"I'm trying to contact her so we can settle this shit now instead of over the internet. But I haven't gotten a response. I don't know how this happened. I didn't even do anything. I know we haven't talked in a while, but damn,"

And that was when Hayoon informed her what was going on from what she heard. She and other people have been overhearing her talking about how upset she was that she would be sharing the stage with Jennie for How's This. She wanted to perform it alone and on top of that felt bothered by the fact that the duet music video with Jennie started to get way more views than the original video.

"I mean it got more views because ARMY loves to support every member of Bangtan. They were bound to have the views boost," Jennie exclaimed on Facetime while Hayoon nodded. "That's one of the amazing things about them. They watched that video for me and I'm grateful but damn, is it that deep? So, she doesn't want to share the stage with me and is feeling some type of the way that her original music video didn't have that many views? Ma'am, if that was a problem, instead of throwing shots, why not talk to me face to face and express yourself? All this childishness for what?"

"I know. It's ridiculous," Hayoon said with a frown. "I had to distance myself from her. I didn't like the things she was saying. And I even talked to her about it but she blew me off and said she didn't care,"

Jennie sighed and shook her head. "Annoying...thanks for telling me...wow...the switch up is crazy...I just don't understand,"

"Of course. Still no reply?"

Jennie went to check back on the app and scoffed. "Did this bitch block me?!"

"What?! No way!"

"Wowwww. So, it's like that? Okay. I can't even contact her anymore...this is making me start to have trust issues a little bit. Like we were so close. We would hang out and talk often...I trusted her with a lot of shit, too. I hope she doesn't spill anything personal. Because now I'm thinking about my relationship,"

"As much as I dislike her attitude, I don't think she'll spill anything especially when she is dating E'Dawn privately,"

"Yeah...I'm not going to air her dirty laundry and talk about how she got a rookie boyfriend and shit. That's unfair to E'dawn and his future career as an idol,"

"Agreed. No need to get him involved. I believe she won't involve Jungkook as well, so no need to worry,"

Jennie sighed. "When I see her at one of these award shows I'll confront her. This is ridiculous,"

"Some kind of girl's girl she is. So close to award season, too? She should not be trying to paint you as this bad person,"

"Yeah...I just don't know how long it's going to take for the public to understand how grimy she is,"

As the news of her performance with Hyuna wasn't happening anymore, Cube Entertainment and even Mnet made the excuse that they felt like Jennie was not ready to perform with Hyuna and was a bit difficult to work with. Which was a load of bull and lots of fans saw through the BS. However, Big Hit responded in defense of her saying that she was ready, was very easy to work with and it was their loss on the collaboration.

It warmed her heart to see the company come to her defense and say she would prove doubters wrong on BTS' stage at the MAMA Awards. Hearing the news that the collaboration was scrapped made her feel down since she had been so excited to perform with someone she looked up to for many years. G-Dragon's words still rang through her mind that not everyone is your friend in the industry and the switch ups are crazy.

Now back to reality, Jennie continued to sit by her desk, deep in thought about the situation. All she wanted to do was speak to her like an adult and squash whatever issue she had with her. But with her being blocked, it was clear she wanted nothing to do with Jennie.

It had been days since the first set of disses along with lyric changes to throw shots at her and the lack of response from Jennie had everyone talking.

People commented:

'Unbothered. I like that,'

'Hyuna cooked you!'

'Everything she said about Jennie was true,'

'Rookie! Hyuna is better than you!'

'So, are you going to respond to HyunA?'

'Damn, still no response?'

'Jennie is known for her impressive stage presence at MAMA. They could have been a powerful duo if egos didn't get in the way. Something ain't right,'

'LOL Hyuna won by default. She is taking forever to respond. Is she scared?'

'Get in the booth, Jennie. Or are you taking the L?'

'So, you just gonna let her talk shit about you like that?'

'Jennie doesn't have to respond to anything.'

'I hate how you guys are instigating this drama.'

'No response is a response, Jennie!'

'Does Miss Bangtan need her bulletproof boy scouts to help her with this one?'

'I bet Jennie is the problem. Because she and Hyuna were great friends. She must have done something wrong...'

'Time to stop hiding behind your boys, woman up and respond to your senior.'

'Respect queen Hyuna!'

'You should be lucky she even asked you to collaborate.'

'ARMY gets on my nerves. They like to spam and stream everything for bragging rights. That music video didn't deserve to get higher views than the OG!'

'Yikes...going after one of the chillest people in the K-Pop industry is not wise because if Jennie responds I bet not hear shit that she was disrespectful when Hyuna started this first. And don't try to say respect your seniors.'

'Y'all are a little too comfortable being rude to Jennie on her page...'

'Hyuna started it and Jen will finish it. Watch!'

'Hyuna is being a bit too bold running her mouth.'

'Of all people when you have Bangtan backing her? And other idols who are close friends with her? I don't understand the logic.'

'Hyuna is untouchable in the industry, no idols will come to her aid,'

'I doubt any idol will defend Jennie from Hyuna. She should handle this herself.'

'Bangtan shouldn't always have to fight her battles. She should handle this by herself,'

'Jennie handles business. She'll respond,'

Still, on social media, she saw herself getting tagged in a lot of Hyuna stuff. Come to find out she was still sneak dissing and her stans were eating it up and defending her. However, ARMY was not too happy about the abrupt attitude change and shade thrown at Miss Bangtan.

"Do you want me to say something?" Yoongi asked, who sat next to her, ready to defend her honor.

"Yoongi...no," she firmly said as she turned to him.

"The situation is so grimy. Like damn, the bitch can't share the stage with you on her song that she wanted you to be on in the first place? Why bother asking to collab?" Angelina spoke up, sitting on the couch with Namjoon. "Did she think it wasn't going to go well? She underestimated the power of ARMY's support and your talent as an artist. Those comments on that YouTube video were mainly about you, Jennie. You outshined her in the music video and she was mad about it and has been holding it in for a while. The bitch is jealous,"

"I'm just confused and thrown off by everything. Like I thought we were friends—"

"Well, she's not your friend," Angelina firmly cut Jennie off, getting upset about Hyuna. "A friend doesn't sneak diss. Fuck her,"

"Are you going to let her just bash your name like this in public?" Namjoon asked.

"She is South Korea's IT girl. Everyone loves her. And if I respond...I have a feeling I'll be public enemy number one. You know how the media is gonna twist this and make me the bad guy," Jennie reminded.

"Jen, I love your calmness. You know I'll be ready to fight somebody if someone did that to me. Diss tracks would already be on standby to release," Angelina added. "I wish I had your calmness, right now, as we speak. But stop being nice,"

"I'm not trying to be! I'm not! I'm not being nice, I'm trying to wrap my head around being blindsided! I'm getting annoyed, now..." she sighed out of frustration.

"Good. Write about it,"

"Listen, I shouldn't cause Bangtan any drama. Award season is coming up...I can't be taking the attention off of us at the award shows. I don't even want to be involved in this drama...why can't I just have some genuine celebrity friends, that won't get mad over petty shit, like this? I'm getting PTSD from Hailey and that took a while to heal from,"

"Munchkin, you're not causing drama for us," Hobi spoke up with his arms crossed as he leaned against the wall, next to the couch. "I know you're thinking of the negatives but the positives outweigh it. You should respond,"

"And you know that people love you, too. She is not the only beloved K-Pop idol, in the world," Yoongi affirmed. "You've been making a positive name for yourself with us as BTS. ARMY and us will not stand for the slander. I want you to write about it all,"

"Turn this negative into a positive," Namjoon reminded.

"Diss track incoming?" Angelina smiled.

Jennie let the rappers' words sink in as she glanced at all of them. They had a point. She couldn't just let her bash her name like this out of nowhere. On top of that, she didn't want to hear anything about being respectful to her seniors when she was getting disrespected unprovoked. It bothered her when people think they can talk to younger people in any type of way. Respect should be a mutual thing.

"For now, don't bother engaging in the drama on social media. Don't respond to any of it online. Continue to go about your day like normal," Namjoon suggested.

"Yeah...okay. You're right. All of you," Jen replied. "I can't let her just get away with talking shit and not saying it directly to my face. Especially when she didn't even want to respond to my messages and blocked me. She needs to get checked,"

"Good. I'm looking forward to this," Hobi smiled.

"You and I both," Yoongi revealed his gummy smile.

Jennie chuckled and turned to Namjoon. "This reminds me a little bit of the Bobby situation and your diss at MAMA 2014. But yours was more of entertainment. Unlike this,"

The leader chuckled at that and nodded. "Yeah. Well, what are you going to do, now?"

"Handle it," she firmly responded and grabbed her notebook.

"Best news I've heard all day. Get writing," Angelina broke out into a big smile, as the others agreed.

"Mama Awards 2016. Speak your truth, there. Let's talk to the staff later about everything," Namjoon recommended.

"Okay," Jennie nodded, liking that idea. "I'll show you what I have when I'm done. Can I be alone, please? To work?"

The boys respected her decision and left her to work while Angelina stayed behind with Namjoon waiting for her outside the studio.

"Word of advice? Try the 8 Mile method. The stealing thunder strategy. You remember the movie and the final rap battle with Eminem?" Angelina asked as she got off the couch.

"Yeah. I've watched it a few times. That's not a bad idea. I'll work on it,"

"Good. Happy writing. Just make sure you eat, okay? Don't be stuck here, all day. I'll be with the others,"

"Don't worry, I'll take breaks. See you,"

After Angelina left, Jennie got started with writing. She also began going through her vault of music files she created over the years to pick which one to perform her rap with.

Rapping…kind of scary to think that this is what it would come to. Yoongi had been an amazing mentor. If Hobi could learn how to rap when he had no background in it, she could too. The amount of faith the rap line had in her to encourage her to respond to Hyuna in this way was a big deal. It was a deal that she could not mess up.

As she proceeded to work, her dog Tony slept quietly on the dog bed in the corner, tired out from playing around with the members a few hours earlier. Jennie occasionally glanced at the adorable dog with a smile while she worked. Miss Bangtan worked for hours, doing research, writing, and analyzing Hyuna's recent interviews regarding her. So engrossed in her work, she jumped slightly when she heard a series of knocks at her door.

"Who?" she asked out loud.

"Your Golden Boyfriend. Jeon Cena!"

"Enter my realm, my love," she smiled and turned her seat around to see him walking in with a few bags of food. "Hey!"

"Hi. I figured you were hungry so I bought food for us," he set the bags on the desk and grabbed a seat to sit next to her.

"It smells so good, thanks," she kissed him sweetly.

Getting a good look at her, he noticed she was wearing one of his hoodies which made him smile. The way it was oversized on her made her look even more cute.

"Any time. And your package of Smarties came. I grabbed a few bags so I can fill up your bowl,"

"You are the best!" she squealed happily and kissed him again before planting multiple kisses all over his cheek, making him giggle.

After he filled up the bowl, he gently grabbed her hand to stop her from reaching out to grab a few pieces.

"Ah-ah! What are you doing?" he called out.

"Helping myself to my smarties?"

"Nah. Food first. Let's eat,"

"What? Oh, come on. Babe, don't do that,"

"Food first. Smarties after," he released her hand.

"They're small, they're not going to spoil my stomach,"

"Food, honey," he grinned, opening the platter of chicken for them to eat. "Take a break,"

"Fine. I should take a break, anyway," she stretched and closed her notebook, placing it to the side. "Game of Thrones?"

"Yeah, we stopped at Season 5, right?"

"Hm hm. The first episode," she set everything up on one of her monitors.

"Hyung told us what you're working on. I'm glad you're going to go through with it. It's not fair,"

She smiled softly and nodded. "Yeah…I just wished she talked to me,"

"She'll realize the mistake she made when you respond. I'm looking forward to seeing what you say. You always have a way of showing off your craft during the MAMA Awards. ARMY will be in for a treat,"

"Thanks. I hope to do it justice. I've been thinking about a lot…especially with the new year coming up. I think my New Year's Resolution for 2017 is to…be more cautious of who I trust and who I open up to. To see my childhood friends again when we go on tour and write songs in a more positive light. I think that'll be a pretty good start,"

He leaned over to kiss the side of her head. "I like that. That is a good start,"

---------

The day of the Melon Music Awards was finally here and backstage was lively as everyone went through rehearsals. Jen was excited to see familiar faces again as she strolled backstage. She let out a deep breath when she finally saw Hyuna who had finished talking with a staff member. Jen had been seeing her all day but whenever she'd get close, Hyuna would rush off.

Not anymore.

As Jen approached her, she knew people were watching her every move, wondering what might happen. Keeping her head up high, she finally came face to face with her.

"You got something to say to me?" Jen questioned as she looked at her with a frown.

Hyuna looked a little surprised and took a step back.

"Nothing at all," she replied with a fake smile.

"Are we going to talk like adults or are you gonna run, again? Where's that energy when you were taking shots at me on that variety show?" she asked and tilted her head to the side when she didn't reply. "If you don't want to be friends anymore, that's cool. I don't care. But I don't appreciate you going out of your way to talk shit about me and lying on my name. Blocking me so we can't speak on the phone? That is mad corny,"

"Jennie, you're causing a scene," she brought up as noticeably more people were being nosy and watching the confrontation.

"I do not care, stop trying to change the subject. What is with you throwing shade like ARMY and I wouldn't notice? Even talking about how difficult I am to work with? The fuck? Do we have a problem?"

"Do we?"

It took all the strength Jen had to not pop her in the head right then and there with the way she sarcastically responded. Hyuna was playing games and it was getting harder for Jen not to put her hands on her. MAMA Awards couldn't come fast enough.

"Keep my name out of your mouth. I'm not telling you again. Are we clear?" Jen demanded with a glare.

"Crystal."

After walking away and calming down, Jen informed the members about the nonsense. It annoyed them with the way Hyuna responded and highly anticipated Jen's performance at the MAMA Awards to set her straight. It was going to be worth the wait.

As the show was about to start, Jen went to the women's bathroom and as she came out to wash her hands, she saw BlackPink primping in the mirror and talking amongst themselves about how excited they were for the show.

Jennie gasped in happiness and turned around with a bright smile. "Hi! Oh my gosh, we've been looking for you!"

The sudden burst of excitement surprised Jen as she stood by the four girls who were happily smiling after she dried her hands. Once it officially registered that she was in front of BlackPink, Jen grinned widely.

"Hey! You're BlackPink! Wow! Hi! Oh my gosh, wow, y'all look so beautiful!"

"So do you!" Jisoo beamed as they all bowed.

"Hi, I'm Jennie. Jennie Walker," Jen introduced herself.

"Nice name. Hi, I'm Jennie. Jennie Kim," Jennie giggled with her and held her hands.

"Thank you. Nice name!"

"Thanks! It's nice to catch you before the show. It's really nice to meet you,"

"It's nice to meet you, girls, too!"

"Hi~! I'm Rosé!"

"I'm Lisa!"

"And I'm Jisoo!"

After releasing Jennie's hands, Jen spoke, "You girls are amazing! It's great watching you ladies thrive. I love your songs and I can't wait to see you perform, tonight,"

"Thank you! We've seen your dance videos of our songs. You perform it so well. Maybe you should be the fifth member," Jisoo giggled.

"I'd love to but Bangtan would be upset," she teased, as the girls laughed.

They were all so sweet. Their friendly energy matched so well with Jen's as they all vibed and immersed themselves in bathroom girl talk. As Jen had her eyes on Jisoo, she pointed out that her beauty was on a whole new level. Photos and videos didn't do her justice.

"Can we hug? Are you ladies ok with that? I'm like such a hugger these days but I like to ask before touching," Jen asked kindly.

"Of course!" Lisa beamed and went right in to embrace her with the rest of the girls.

"Are you ladies excited for tonight?" Jen asked.

"Nervous! But very excited. It should be a fun show. The dress rehearsal went well," Rosé replied.

"You ladies are gonna kill it. Have fun with it! Go out there and show them that BlackPink ain't playing around,"

Jen's encouragement seemed to have pumped them up as they smiled brightly and thanked her.

"You're close with Bam Bam, right? He's one of my good friends," Lisa spoke up.

"Yeah! I love him! He's the best and one of the funniest guys ever. He's a piece of work, huh?" Jen chuckled.

"He is! I hope we can all hang out sometime,"

"Yeah, I'd love that. We have a 97 Liner group chat we can add you and Rosé in! We're trying to see when we can have another get together. Even if it's just a handful of us. I have the WINGS tour coming up so it'll probably be a long while until Jungkook and I can participate in any hangouts. But we'll be there in spirit if the group plans something in our absence,"

"Being in the group chat sounds like fun. It'll be nice to get to know the others who were born in the same year. You'll introduce us?" Rosé asked.

"Yeah! I got you! You have to meet Hayoon. She is one of the sweetest girls you'll ever meet. So down to earth. She can be a little shy but give her some time and she'll open up to you. When you see her show off her real personality she gets very intense when playing games. Especially card games,"

Lisa and Rosé giggled at that.

"G-Dragon speaks highly of you. I always see him at YG and when we catch up he always brings you up," Jennie added.

"He talks about me to you?" Jen's eyes lit up.

Jen remembered that Jennie worked with G-Dragon before, being in one of his music videos. And Rosé even worked with him, on a song. It made her heart soar that he spoke highly of her. She hoped that one day she could collaborate with him as well. They brought it up a few times but she wanted to continue to improve her craft as an artist before working with him on music. She wanted to be at her best to sing with someone as legendary as him.

"Yeah! He told us he took you under his wing. I remember him saying how determined you looked when you approached him at K-Con. He admired your drive to take action. The way you did not hesitate to ask for advice on how to be a better performer. He also told us you are someone he trusts and that you are authentic," Rosé added.

"Wow...I am honored, my gosh," Jen let out a breath and placed her hands over her heart.

"Can I just say I love the move that you do with Jungkook during Blood, Sweat and Tears!? That flip and spin? It's so good!" Lisa said excitedly. "I want to try to do it during a dance practice but your chemistry with him is something that cannot be duplicated. I've studied dance covers of your little duet and it's clear that the move was meant for you two. I admire your passion when dancing,"

"Aw really? Thank you! I admire your passion for dancing, too! You be killing it on stage! You move with such grace and power, I get blown away every time, girl. I need to learn a thing or two from you,"

"We should practice together, sometime!"

"I'd be down!"

Their conversation was cut short when they heard an announcement that the show was about to begin.

"Before we go to our seats, can we take a selfie?" Jisoo suggested.

"Yeah! Let's do it!" Jen cheered.

Jisoo took out her phone and held the camera up high while the girls crowded around Jen. With all of their face cards on point, the selfie turned out beautifully as they posed with peace signs, kissy faces, and bright smiles.

"Oh, we cute, cute! Send this to me!" Miss Bangtan requested.

After exchanging numbers with the girls, the five of them went to their seats with fansites filming and noticing them together. Seeing the sight made ArmyBlinks excited that they finally met and hoped they take pictures.

---------

As the show began, Jennie sat with Bangtan as the camera occasionally caught her exciting reactions which would make Armies cheer. Jennie happily cheered and lip synced Blackpink's lyrics with fans noticing how Rosé biased she was.

When it was time for Bangtan to perform BST, audience members and idols anticipated JenKook's signature move but they didn't perform it this time and did different choreography. The disappointment was evident on some idols' faces as they whispered amongst themselves about them not doing their move as well as fans.

"No~! I wanted to see the spin," Lisa whined. "Why didn't they do the spin?"

"I know! I wonder why they decided to change the choreography," Jisoo pouted.

"Damn, no spin?" Zico wondered.

"Darn, they didn't do it? What changed?" Kai wondered with EXO.

Fans tweet:

'Are you fucking serious!? Jennie and Jungkook wtf!? I am PISSED!'

'JenKook y'all had ONE JOB!! ONE!! We wanted the spin!'

'I know these damn babies did not skip their highly anticipated dance move of BST,'

'I stayed up all night only for them not to do the spin!? Big Hit, I'm about to sue! Count your MF days!'

'Who scrapped the spin!? I wanna fight! #BringBackTheSpin'

'LISTEN!! If it ain't broke don't fix it! Nothing and I mean NOTHING needed to be changed in JenKook's duet. Keep it like it is! It was perfect! #BringBackTheSpin'

Backstage after their performance, Jungkook laughed at the flooded tweets from Armies and other fans. They all were complaining about them not doing the dance move and it surprised him to see how much viewers enjoyed the unique move. The couple wanted to do something a little different for the Melon Music Awards but clearly, their decision did not sit well with everyone which amused them.

Jungkook tweeted for damage control, 'Ah...we didn't do the spin this time. Sorry ARMY. We will do it next time,'

Immediately fans replied:

'Y'all better! That move is generational!'

'What were y'all thinking switching it up!? We better get nothing but sexiness the next time y'all do it! I am so serious!'

'Bullying works guys!!'

'Y'all know better!'

'OH ARD! That's what I thought. You two better raise the bar next time!'

'GOOD! It better be sexy af the next time you two perform it! I need my JenKook crumbs!'

'I hope the next time they do the move they take it up a notch. Their chemistry has me glued to my screen!'

'THANK YOU!!'

As the show was drawing to a close, she sat in between Yoongi and Taehyung while they watched the presenters call the nominees for album of the year. In Jennie's mind, she assumed EXO was going to win it. EXO had been powerhouses for their albums and the big 3, JYP, SM, and YG always swept these big awards. However, it was an honor to even be nominated in the category for The Most Beautiful Moment In Life: Young Forever album.

She sat, relaxed, already ready to applaud EXO for winning the award as she waited for the presenter to say it.

"2016 Melon Music Award Best Album of the Year goes to...BTS!"

The sound of the group's name caused Bangtan to widen their eyes, looking at each other in utter disbelief.

Did they REALLY just call BTS the album of the year winners!? WHAT!?

Idols around them stood up, equally surprised that a group not from the big 3 won the award as they applauded them. GFriend cheered happily, bouncing up and down as Hayoon yelled cheerfully for Jennie. Namjoon immediately stood up, stunned by the announcement.

"Oh s—" Hobi shouted in shock.

Jennie sat in her seat dumbfounded as she looked around, glancing at the members who equally had the same shocked expression.

"What the f—" she stopped herself as she covered her mouth, trying to process the news that Bangtan had just won their first Daesang.

Daesang...they won a Daesang!

"We won? We won!?" she slowly stood up once the rest of the boys did.

Armies around the venue cheered and screamed as they waved their ARMY bombs in celebration.

"Ahhhh Jennie looks so surprised!" Hayoon giggled to her group before quickly rushing over to embrace her.

It started to become a tradition for these two to find each other to hug, high five, or do something whenever they won an award. Hayoon grabbed her hands and jumped up and down excitedly with her.

"BTS did it! BTS won! I'm so happy for you!" she beamed, pulling her in for another tight hug.

"Holy shit, what the hell is happening!? Is this real!?" Jennie exclaimed, hugging her tightly.

"Yes! Go up there!" she laughed and lightly pushed her forward after pulling away.

Jennie adjusted herself and began walking up to the stage with the rest of the group as they bowed to everyone. She walked with Hobi and Suga as a bright smile came across her beautiful face, feeling her heart pound. As they made it to the stage with Namjoon holding the award, she stood in between Jin and Hobi.

"ARMY! Thank you!" Namjoon shouted on the mic with a big smile as he tried to control his overwhelming emotions.

Seeing Jin start to cry made Jennie begin to rub his back to comfort him. She did her best not to cry herself as she soaked in this moment with the boys. Noticing Hobi looking like he was about to cry, she went to rub his back too, comforting him.

"We have received the best award since our debut here at the Melon Awards. Bang Sihyuk PD-nim, Big Hit Entertainment, parents and friends who have helped us, I want to thank them again and ARMYs, I love you! ARMY, I LOVE YOU!" Namjoon shouted with elation.

After he finished his speech, the members all went in for a big group hug. They all had big smiles on their faces, feeling euphoric from this victory. When they make it backstage, they are still stunned and thrilled that they won the award with a Bangtan Bomb camera filming them.

"Wow really...wow," Namjoon spoke, still processing everything.

"I was so surprised," Jungkook said on camera.

"We weren't anticipating it. We really weren't expecting it. We weren't even expecting it one bit,"

"Thank you so so much. We were so shocked,"

"We won! We won~! I still can't believe it!" Jennie squealed and shook the camera. "Thank you so much!"

Noticing Hobi's tears running down his cheeks with the foundation running down too, Jennie embraced him tightly while the camera filmed them.

"I know...I know..." she murmured. "I'm so proud of us,"

"Army, thank you so much!" Jin said on camera with his tear stained face while Jennie released Hobi. "Thank you, Army! Thank you, Army!"

"Bring it in," she outstretched her arms for Jin and he immediately kissed the top of her head and hugged her tightly.

"She gives the best hugs," he told the camera.

After they returned to their seats, Jennie sat in between Hobi and Jin to continue to watch the show while pulling themselves together. As EXO closed the show, she watched their performance in admiration.

"I wonder what it would be like to close an award show," Jennie wondered out loud with a smile.

Jin listened and began to speak as she looked up at him. "I believe that one day we will get the opportunity. If we can get this Daesang then this is just a step forward in achieving more as a group,"

"Yeah. We will, for sure,"

After the show, they took photos with the trophy and hugged the staff members as they continued to celebrate. Once Angelina found Jennie, she ran and jumped on her, making them both fall to the floor as they laughed.

"Ah~! I am so proud of you! BTS did it! BTS won album of the year!" she began giving Jennie multiple kisses all over her face as she continued to laugh.

After they got up, they embraced tightly, getting emotional.

"Wow, look at you! Thriving in BTS! That album deserved album of the year! It has bangers on top of bangers. This is your motherfuckin' moment, sis! Enjoy it!"

"Thank you! And thank you for being here to support us," Jen murmured against her shoulder.

"You know I'm always going to be there for you just like you are with me. You're stuck with me for life, sis. This win is only the beginning. Watch Bangtan soar to new heights after this! You better enjoy the damn ride, it's gonna be a fun one!"

After pulling away, Angelina wiped Jennie's tears.

"I'm not gonna lie, I thought EXO was gonna win it. When they said BTS I was like what!?" Jen continued to ramble as the camera person for the Bangtan bomb began to film the other members to get their thoughts.

Later on, Jennie sat down on a chair and took in some deep breaths to pull herself together while Jin and Jimin rubbed her back.

"I'm okay...I'm alright...wow...this feels like a dream. This feels like a freaking dream," she sighed.

She shook her head and started praying, thanking the Lord for this moment as emotions came over her again. Tears ran down her cheeks as she whispered to herself, "Thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you!"

After she was done praying, she looked up and smiled at the guys when they all went to comfort her. "We did it. We really did it. This is amazing. Wow...over the big frickin' 3!? Blessed! I am so proud of us! Thank you. All of you for making this experience so fun and rewarding,"

"Your family is on the line!" Angelina beamed and handed Jen her phone to reveal her parents and sisters on facetime.

It was wholesome hearing them scream and cheer for Bangtan. The boys even jumped in to say hello and thanked them for their support.

"Ok now that we got the celebrations out of the way, why in the hell didn't you and Jungkook do the spin!?" Jennie's mom complained causing Bangtan and Angelina to laugh.

"Yeah! We were looking forward to it!" Alani frowned.

"You guys need a redo! ASAP!" Vienna added.

"I admit I was looking forward to seeing it and felt my world crashing down when it didn't happen," Jennie's dad spoke up.

"You are so dramatic!" Jennie laughed. "Not you all mad we didn't do this spin, tonight,"

"We'll do it next time," Jungkook grinned. "We promise!"

"You two better. I'll be watching," Jennie's dad pointed at them.

--------------

Days later, Namjoon was in his studio doing a V-Live to catch up with ARMY. As the live went on with fun and engaging moments, he then started to talk about Jennie. A proud smile appeared on his face as he thought of her.

"Jennie is the best. She has been improving a lot behind the scenes and continues to keep a good head on her shoulders. When I first saw her, I was watching the audition for the Bangtan Girl for BTS. She stood out to me because of her outfit choice." He chuckled. "She looked like she was going to wreck someone. I had my head down, so I would listen closely to each person's lyrics created for bulletproof, while V was next to me. As soon as I heard her verse, I had to look up. I know she was probably a bit stressed getting hit with a bombshell of creating a verse for the song over a weekend and presenting it on a Monday but she made it work and she impressed me. When I met her, I thought she was very determined and cute. She's like a little sister to me. And I feel like a proud big brother watching her improve every day in her skills. Ah...I'm getting too personal, am I? Sorry,"

His eyes scanned the comments flowing in.

'Awwww keep going, it's okay! This is so cute!'

'NamJen forever! Best bond in Bangtan!'

'Awwwww he looks like a proud big brother!'

'Thank you for always taking care of Jennie!'

'My baby Jennie and the best leader Namjoon! Thank you for being there for her!'

'Thank you for being a great leader to her!'

"I just want to be the best leader for her. And I want to be that strength she needs to keep pushing forward. She has improved so much over the years. She was so timid when it came to filming music videos, but after filming videos like Dope, Fire, and Blood, Sweat & Tears, I've seen her confidence and charisma grow. I may not understand what it's like to move and work in another country like she did but she has really opened up and become more comfortable here. She's fully adjusting to South Korea. And I'm very proud of her. All of Bangtan is,"

As he continued his live, someone knocked on his door and he turned around. Announcing the person to come in, Jennie strolled in with a bright smile and a plate of cookies.

"Hey! Here, I just made them. I'm going around delivering cookies before working in my studio,"

"For me!? Really!? Oh, this is a great surprise. I'll help myself to these now," he thanked her and took the plate to place on his desk. "You need to open up a bakery,"

"I want to! I wouldn't mind going to culinary school or something. I'd love to make my own business and open up a bakery, one day. We'll see what the future holds. Oh, you on live? Hey, ARMY! I miss you, guys! How are ya?" She waved and read the comments.

'Jennie!!'

'Hi, mom!'

'She baked again!!'

'Jennie, I love you!'

'Do the spin with Jungkook!'

'Do the move with Kookie!'

'JenKook spin for MAMA!'

'JenKook move!'

'Why didn't you do the move at Melon!?'

'Ma'am we want answers about Melon! What happened to the spin!?'

"Yo...." she began to laugh out loud at the comments. "Not y'all roasting me again for not doing the spin. It's been a week! Is it that serious? Oh my gosh,"

Namjoon started to laugh at the comments too, amused that this has become such a big deal in the fandom. When he heard even idols were asking about the spin, it was clear that JenKook had a chokehold in the industry with their strong chemistry.

"ARMY has been a little upset about that," he brought up.

"A little? They spamming my Instagram, too. I didn't think it was going to cause this much of a fuss. You guys really like our signature move?"

Comments rushed in:

'DUH!'

'The way you two dance together are goals!'

'YES GIRL!'

'I can't with her lmfao.'

"Look forward to MAMA, okay? I gotta go but cheer us on at MAMA. Everything will be worth the wait. See ya!" she beamed and left.

----------

The day of the MAMA Awards was finally here. The day Jennie anticipated the most. She had a good feeling about this show and was excited to show off her hard work with what she had planned. The morning of the show, she decided to tweet one simple word along with an eyebrow raising hashtag.

'Bet. #GonBeAnInteresting24Hours #Jen' 

Jennie had been a trending topic on Naver and various K-Pop news outlets, which caused people to anticipate the MAMA Awards even more to see what might happen and if she may respond to Hyuna. Her silence on the matter had been a hot topic and now with her tweet going viral, fans stirred in a frenzy.

People tweeted:

'Uh oh!'

'Woke up and chose violence I see. Now I have to stay up and tune in. What time does the show start again EST time??'

'She broke her silence!'

'She's about to get her lick back!'

'Hyuna has not realized what she had done and is about to face the consequences,'

'Aw, shit...'

'She is about to piss people off and I'm going to love every second of it,'

'No matter what happens and no matter what you do, we will always love you, Jennie!'

'You about to respond!?'

'Hyuna is attending the show, too!! Uh oh....'

'Guys...I think something big is about to happen. Bigger than what we may think. Something is gonna go down tonight,'

'I'm so scared for tonight. Jennie, what are you about to do?'

Already in her short ruffled white dress, her hair was put up in a bun with hair on the side as she sat to get her makeup done. She also wore a small daisy pin for good luck thanks to G-Dragon gifting it to her on her birthday.

"Jen, what can viewers anticipate from you, tonight?" J-Hope asked with a grin as he was getting filmed for their MAMA 2016 Bangtan Bomb.

Glancing up, she smiled. "Expect the unexpected,"

-----

As the members got out of the car for the Red Carpet, they were met with loud screams, photography, and cheers with the MCs announcing their arrival. Jimin held out his hand for Jennie to take and he aided her out of the car.

"Thanks, Chim," she smiled warmly.

It was awesome to see international fans travel to the MAMA Awards. She tried to wave and make eye contact with every fan she could. Peeping some of her fansites made her heart soar. The dedication they had for her did not go unnoticed. Miss Bangtan heard her name get shouted, making her turn to who it was as the fan giggled excitedly and waved. She waved back and grinned as the fan was happy to have caught the moment on their phone.

The group proceeded to walk and made it to where the MCs were, standing on the stage.

"It's BTS, who are taking the world by storm, that is entering, right now. They're a group with perfect performances and won an award for producing their own albums,"

No matter what, Jennie didn't think she'd get used to all the screaming and cheering. It was like each event they attended, the screams got louder and she came to realize Bangtan was really moving up. It was a beautiful thing.

As Jungkook walked closely behind her, he caught a whiff of her perfume. He closed his eyes for a brief moment, smiling softly, enjoying the scent.

"You smell nice," he murmured, opening his eyes.

She glanced back at him and smiled. "Thank you. Hayoon got me some new perfume for my birthday. I like it,"

"I like it, too. You should keep wearing it,"

"I will,"

She stood in between Jimin and Jungkook as the group did their greeting and struck a pose just for the fans.

"Today since we are here at MAMA, we personally would like to hear some good news," Namjoon said on the mic.

"We are just one month away from 2017. Can we ask what plans you have?" The MCs asked.

"We're planning a fanmeet in Japan," Jin answered. "And we're working hard on music production so please look forward to it,"

Just a short while away before the show began with idols heading to their seats, Hyuna made her way to the stage and sat in her seat which was front row. There was tension in the air as anticipation filled to what Jennie might do as a response. Everyone was interested to see how this was going to go and idols were living for the drama. Gossip went all around the idols as they had private discussions on what might happen and who might win this.

"Where is Miss Bangtan?" Chanyeol wondered as he looked around, seeing that she wasn't sitting with the rest of BTS.

"Probably still getting ready?" Sehun assumed.

"I just want to see what she has planned tonight. Hyuna is already seated," he pointed out.

With Jennie, being the social butterfly and eager to meet her favs, she had strolled backstage to find the three men she wanted to meet. First up was Timbaland. He had been invited to perform with Eric Nam and to receive an award. Timbaland had worked with so many artists and was one of the many inspirations to her. She still believed he, Nelly Furtado, and Justin Timberlake were one of the best trios ever in music. They mixed so well.

He was so chill in person and they took a few photos. He even looked pleased to see a black woman here as she thanked him for all his work. Perhaps one day she'll get a chance to work with him. She shared that she DJs and has been making songs for herself that are not quite ready to be released. He encouraged her to keep at it and gave her advice on making music which she took to heart, feeling grateful for his words. One day she will share her passions with ARMY. 

Meeting Wiz Khalifa was a fun experience, with them sharing a hug and him having a big grin on his face. She expressed her admiration for his song with Charlie Puth and that she couldn't wait to see him perform tonight.

Meeting THE Quincy Jones had her starstruck. One of the greatest music producers of all time was in front of her as they shook hands. Her face warmed when he called her gorgeous and it was sweet of him to take time to talk to her. He listened to her talk about making music and he gave her lots of words of wisdom on creating.

She could listen to Quincy talk all day. He had a way with words that made her feel like she could do anything her creative mind envisioned when producing. But what stuck out to her the most was when he told her some of the best advice he had gotten.

"Your music will never be more or less than you are a human being,"

And it stuck with her. Being an idol is exhausting at times but she loved the work and the way it paid off. She wanted to remain happy. She wanted to continue to thrive with Bangtan and enjoy life. She wanted to speak her truth. She had to be vulnerable tonight when she got on that stage for her solo. She truly needed to dig down deep tonight when responding to Hyuna.

After tonight, she wanted to remove all negative thoughts and move forward with everything. And to take a break from social media. A break from social media was needed. Breaks were good and she could always see it assisting her mentally.

After speaking to these men, she felt a fire light in her and felt even more musically inspired. She posted the photos on Twitter with the caption, 'An honor to meet these amazing & talented black men! Night has been made! Thank you for your kindness and words of wisdom! #Jen'

After going to the bathroom, Jennie made her way to the stage, earning loud cheers from fans when they saw her. She smiled and waved, heading over to where Bangtan was sitting. She ignored Hyuna's presence as she walked past her and acknowledged her idol friends sitting around. Fansites filming her caught some reactions of some idols watching her in awe, admiring her look for the night as she took a seat next to Jungkook at the end.

"Welcome back!" Jungkook grinned.

"Yeah, glad to see you smiling, brighter. Did something happen?" Hobi asked.

"Thanks! And yeah, I got to meet Wiz, Timbaland and Quincy Jones! My heart was racing a bit! They were awesome! I took photos with them. You'll see on our Twitter," she beamed.

The members were surprised and happy as she talked about the interactions she had with each of them. They could tell she was creatively moved by their words of wisdom. Soon after, the boys were all immersed in their own conversations while Jennie tried to adjust her bracelet which was put on a bit too tightly. She accidentally dropped the bracelet and both her and Jungkook aimed to kneel to grab it.

"Thanks, I got it," she glanced at him with a smile, grabbing it first as they both rose, still sitting quite close.

Jungkook got caught in 4K with the way he kept his eyes on her while her focus was on the stage and audience members as the show was preparing to start soon. The way he glanced at her up and down as a small smile came across his face with his lingering gaze did not go unnoticed with fan sites filming them.

Feeling his eyes on her, she turned and looked at him up and down, with them both occasionally glancing at each other's lips. Then they began to smile as she found herself getting lost in his blue contact colored eyes.

No wonder things felt like something was missing. The two of them realized they hadn't kissed each other all day. They'd been so busy preparing for the show and making sure their dances were fine that they didn't even get a chance to share one kiss today.

"Do you two need to be separated?" Yoongi asked teasingly while covering his mouth to avoid getting his lips read by fans watching them. This became a reoccurring thing to cover their mouths so they could speak more freely at these shows.

Jimin and Taehyung started laughing since they had been watching the couple this whole time.

"They haven't kissed at all, today. Jungkook might just go feral," Jimin giggled.

"Yeah, you two need to be separated," Yoongi advised with an amused smirk, making the 95 Liners laugh again.

"We really don't," Jen replied. "We'll be on our best behavior,"

"Are you sure? You two are distracted by each other," Taehyung teased.

"Do you remember where we are?" Jimin added to the teasing.

"Did we fail to mention we caught Jungkook's pleased expression when smelling her new perfume? He can't get enough,"

"Hyung!" Jungkook glared, feeling his face warm.

"We've moved to you two enjoying each other's smells and scents you use? You two need to relax," Hobi laughed.

"Oh my God, can you leave us alone and stop watching us?" Jennie exclaimed, feeling her face flushed.

"Should I be concerned?" Jin asked, listening to the conversation. "Maybe you two should switch seats," 

"Seriously?" Jungkook frowned.

"We'll be on our best behavior, Jin," Jennie reassured.

"Are you sure? Because I do not believe that,"

"Neither do I," Namjoon spoke up with a light laugh.

"You guys are exaggerating!" Jennie exclaimed. 

"This time, I don't think we are," Jin chuckled and let out a sigh, already knowing they were going to drive him nuts tonight. "Just please try to behave yourselves and stay professional tonight,"

"Sir, yes, sir!"

Once the show began, Jennie jumped for joy and found herself getting emotional when IOI won Best New Female Artist. Cameras caught her looking proud and ecstatic for the girls with her eyes getting watery.

When GFriend and Seventeen performed for their collaboration, Hayoon was paired up with Vernon. The synchronization of the two groups blew Jennie's mind as she had her jaw dropped at their dancing. When Gallant performed, she smiled over at Taehyung since he was a big fan and cheered loudly with him, overjoyed with his performance.

As Baekhyun and Suzy performed Dream, Jen watched him, mesmerized as the camera caught her singing along to his parts. The members would glance over and smile at her being so into the song, knowing how much she adored him. It caught a lot of attention from Exols and ever since Jennie started meeting the EXO members, Exols took a liking to her. They loved how vocal she was about her admiration for the group and how highly she spoke of them. The EXO members would always have nothing but good things to say about her and enjoyed their sweet moments together. Armies and Exols wondered if they'd share another moment tonight.

Later, Bangtan managed to win Best Dance Performance. However, Jin and Taehyung weren't with them when they announced them as the winners, causing Jennie to laugh. They were probably in the bathroom. Nonetheless, she stood up with the rest of the boys, bowing and thanking everyone with big smiles.

"Yeah! Go, Jennie! Congrats guys!" Bam Bam shouted and approached them with Yugyeom.

The two Got7 members high fived her, Suga, and Jimin before they went up to the stage. Rapmon gave the award to Hobi and stood behind him so he could do the acceptance speech. Jennie smiled proudly as she stood next to him and listened to him speak.

"Wow! Thank you so much for such a huge award," Hobi said on the mic. "And since it's the best performance award for us, there is a larger meaning behind it. Thank you so much. And to the ARMYs who are always supporting us, thank you so much. And I would like to thank Teacher Son Seung Deuk who created this best performance,"

Jennie chuckled once Taehyung and Jin rushed on stage to join them. They both gave her a look as the three of them tried not to burst out in laughter. The trio smiled at one another while Jin placed his hands on Jungkook and Rapmon's shoulders, smiling at them.

"Thank you so much!" Hobi ended his speech, earning loud cheers.

"Thank you, ARMY!" Suga shouted.

"I love you!" Jin added with Taehyung and blew a flying kiss.

----------

As Zico performed Boys and Girls, Jen sat in between Hobi and Taehyung, vibing and doing the choreography. Once he made his way over to where Bangtan was sitting, the members danced in their seats while he took a seat near Rapmon on the arm of the couch. When Bermuda Triangle came on, she stood up with Hobi and Taehyung, getting hyped as they watched Dean and Zico back on the main stage.

"This is my shit!" she started dancing and vibing to Dean, singing along with Hobi and Taehyung.

Don't let 'em in, let 'em in

Get out my zone

We, we, we never know

We, we, we never talk

'Cause we, we, we criminal

Don't let 'em in, let 'em in

Get out my zone

She laughed out loud when Taehyung began dabbing and she followed his movements, making him happy. Once Zico summoned Crush, Jennie immediately turned and locked eyes with Jungkook who was still sitting as they pointed to each other and lip synced his verse.

Nuul jaril jedaero bogo nuwoyaji

Y'all fake bitches tryna act like me

Anjaseo meongman ttaeryeodo nae sopa wie (ssodajineun)

Mula, mula, we gon' pour up

Murder, murder, sumeul jungnyeo

Sangkwaehae ne meori wie gonggi

Nobody can't come over here

Dean, Crush, and Zico killed it on stage, hyping up the crowd. It was one of her favorite performances of the night. Later on, Jen switched seats again and found herself sitting at the end with Jungkook. She grinned as the next act consisted of a collaboration between Got 7, Monsta X, and NCT 127.

Get it lifted

As soon as NCT's Firetruck began to play, Jennie began nodding her head to the beat, enjoying the song. This song was a banger and one of her absolute favorites.

"Firetruck," she mouthed, beginning to lip sync the song while dancing in her seat.

"Ey, yea, yea, yea, yea!" She fan chanted with the audience and Jungkook.

The camera showed Jennie and Jungkook both on the screen as loud cheers occurred and they looked at the camera, headbanging. Bangtan giggled at their enthusiasm and so did some other idols who peeped them on screen.

Fans tweet:

'Why they matching each other's energy so loudly?'

'Their face cards!'

'They're making the same facial expression, so cute'

'JenKook!!'

'I think she does a little bit too much at these award shows. Just sit and enjoy the show, not all the excessive dancing, taking attention from the artists on stage,'

'These two are so beautiful. Wow!'

'Lmfaoooo they are a mood!'

'I'm really happy Mnet is showing Jennie on screen. Her reactions are always so lively instead of others just sitting there,'

'I love how excited she gets about all these groups. Still a K-Pop fan at heart. I'm happy she still reacts this way at shows,'

After NCT performed, Jennie cheered on Jooheon who rapped with Taeyong. His flow and attitude were amazing and she paid close attention to how he performed. Once Monsta X began to perform Fighter, she ended up cheering for Wonho when he was shown singing. She passionately sang his lines while fans had tweeted how Wonho biased she was. After their performance, it was time for Got7 as they performed Hard Carry with her dancing along.

As the show went on, she was proud to see Seventeen win the World Performer Award as she was the first to stand and applaud. Seeing The8 made her smile widely and wave as he waved back.

"Gosh, I hope one day I'm chosen to present an award at one of these shows. It would be fun," Jennie thought out loud.

When the presenters began to announce the nominees for best female vocal performance, Jennie jumped in her seat and cheered loudly when Ailee was shown on the screen. Bangtan glanced at her with knowing smiles, loving her excitement for the woman she had admired for years.

Once Ailee was announced as the winner, she applauded, jumping up and down, excitedly. Just before going up to the stage, Ailee caught a glimpse of Jen and smiled widely, waving at her. When she gave her acceptance speech, the camera caught Jennie watching her with admiration. The angle of where Jennie was filmed caused Twitter to geek over how beautiful her face card was and point out the love in her eyes as she watched Ailee.

With the show getting ready for the next segment, Jennie suddenly received a few packs of smarties from Jungkook.

"How'd you know I was about to ask?" she happily accepted them with surprise in her voice.

"I brought some with me just in case. I was paying attention to your facial expression. When you're about to ask for smarties or say that you wish you had them, you make this cute face. It's like you're pouting,"

"What? I was not pouting..." She turned away, feeling her face warm as he giggled.

"You just did it again,"

"Stop looking at me," she playfully pushed him away, making him laugh harder.

Lately, with the members, her smarties are always on standby. Over the years of getting to know her, they started to understand and know exactly when she wanted the candy and managed to always hand them to her before she opened her mouth to ask.

"Still, thank you," she added and began eating them.

As she ate her smarties, she ended up tossing them up in the air to catch and eat. Wanting to challenge her, Jungkook decided to do it too with his pack of smarties to see who could catch more in their mouths. In the end, Jungkook won as he grinned victoriously while Jennie caught any smarties that she missed from her mouth with her fast hands.

Rule Number One: Do NOT waste Smarties

Next up on the show was Twice and IOI performing. Jennie looked and felt like a proud mom watching IOI perform Pick Me. Fansites caught her entire reaction to the girls performing and thought it was wholesome seeing her get emotional. Being a trainer at Produce 101 to seeing the girls thrive as a group made her heart feel complete. Whenever Jennie was shown on screen, loud cheers would occur and sometimes idols reacted positively when they saw her on screen, with some smiling and commenting that she looked nice.

Once IOI began to perform Very, Very, Very, Jennie began to do the choreography while lip syncing.

nal neomuneomuneomu

neomuneomuneomu neomuneomuneomu

neomuneomuneomu neomuneomuneomu

After they performed, Twice was up to perform Cheer Up and then TT as she watched happily, cheering her friends, Mina and Jihyo, on.

"Just like TT! Just like TT!" she performed the choreography with Taehyung.

-----------

It was time for Hyuna to perform, as some idols were anticipating if anything was going to happen. They hadn't found something this entertaining in a while and hoped something would go down between her and Jennie. Hyuna strutted on stage and performed U&ME. Then she performed How's This with her backup dancers.

Jennie thought it was extremely petty of Mnet to keep a camera right in front of her to film her every reaction but she remained unamused and watched with her head up high. Bangtan didn't even like the fact that the camera was basically in her face nor did Armies.

Suddenly, Hyuna had changed some of her lyrics, not looking Jennie's way as she danced.

Not a high and mighty girl scout in the club behind some fake bulletproof glass. How boring.

Some idols widened their eyes while others glanced over to where Jennie sat.

Yet another diss? This was getting out of control.

Bam Bam cringed and glanced at Jennie with worry, hoping she'd be all right. Hayoon frowned at the diss and shook her head slightly.

However, Jennie only smirked as she continued to watch, knowing that all eyes were on her to see how she'd react. Bangtan glanced at her and as she met their eyes, she gave them a nod. They nodded back and remained calm as they continued to watch the performance.

Suddenly a switch flipped in Jennie's demeanor as she rolled her neck and stared at Hyuna.

'This bitch got me fucked up...' she thought as she kept her cool.

Fans tweet:

'Not again!! Enough already!'

'Is she trying to provoke Jennie?'

'Don't be mad if Jennie catches her in an alley to stomp that ass!'

'The neck roll! I repeat! The neck roll! Jennie just did the neck roll! That is BAD! She got something planned! Get ready!'

'I don't like how she's acting. This is bullying at this point. Hyuna needs to chill,'

'Jen better than me because I would have ran on stage and popped her shit,'

'From the looks of it, Jennie is so bitter and jealous,'

'That smirk means business. I'm not ready,'

'I wish people would stop judging Jennie,'

'Jennie looks like she's plotting,'

'Why does she look so hot when she's upset?'

'Bangtan knows something that we don't because they don't look bothered at all,'

'Bangtan isn't even phased?! What is Jennie planning tonight?'

Little did they know Jennie was listening closely and analyzing what she was saying to use it against her.

'High and mighty...' she thought, making a mental note.

----------

Timbaland arrived on stage to perform with Eric Nam.

And boy was it...awkward.

She sat next to Namjoon during this performance and covered her mouth to murmur to him, "Yo, Timbaland looks so confused. This whole performance is hard to watch,"

And he agreed. It was hard to watch. And she wished the crowd was more excited for Timbaland. It was THE Timbaland and the audience wasn't that loud for him in comparison to Eric Nam. No offense to him.

After being told they were needed backstage, Bangtan got ready for their performance. She changed out of her dress to wear black pants and a long-sleeved ruffled white shirt that hugged her body nicely. With her hair out, she wore a black suit jacket with some silver designs around it, and the daisy pin was placed on the jacket for good luck. As she got ready, she watched on the monitor to see that EXO had won best group and Twice won best female group.

Waiting to get on stage, Jennie ended up posting G-Dragon's iconic diss on the MAMA Awards on her Instagram story, which sparked even more interest in what was going to happen tonight.

"I got a little solo stage. It's going to be pretty fun. I hope everyone likes what I have in store," she beamed at the Bangtan Bomb camera after warming up her voice.

She looked ahead to see Jin checking out the special effects makeup on Taehyung's back to show off his broken wings. He went on the touch it but began to freak out, causing her to giggle.

"It feels like pudding!" Jin exclaimed.

"Why is Jin Hyung so childish?" Namjoon wondered, causing Jennie to laugh again.

The laughter loosened her up and made her less on edge about tonight's big performance.

She was ready.

After everyone was ready and went over last minute rehearsals, the eight of them gathered around and put their hands in the middle.

"All right, fellas! Let's make it a memorable one!" Jennie cheered.

"Indeed! Mama 2016, let's make it a legend. Bangtan! Bangtan!" Namjoon shouted.

"Bang-Bangtan! Fighting!" the group shouted and pushed their hands down.

----------

Backstage with the rest of the boys, Jennie watched with a smile as Jungkook looked ethereal while hanging from the ceiling on stage. He really did his thing. And it was harder than it looked.

She turned to the backup dancers who were patiently waiting for their cue to come out after they performed BST. She greeted them happily and asked if the cookies she made for them yesterday tasted fine. They raved over their love for her baking and appreciated her kindness. She wanted to thank them for being such a great support system for Bangtan and wanted to give them something nice.

"Let's have some fun! See you out there!" She beamed and bowed at them.

On stage, next up was J-Hope performing Boy Meets Evil, hyping up the crowd with a blue background. Then Jimin was revealed on stage, featuring a red background as he danced to Lie while blindfolded.

"The camera work though~?" Jennie watched in awe while the camera did a full circle as he danced.

Then the two had an epic dance collaboration on stage while performing the rest of the choreography for Boy Meets Evil. After they were done, the rest of the group met up on stage and began to perform Blood, Sweat, & Tears as the audience cheered loudly.

wonhae mani mani mani mani

wonhae mani mani mani mani mani mani

wonhae mani mani mani mani

wonhae mani mani mani mani mani mani

Here we go, the most anticipated part. The audience had been waiting to see a MAMA Award version of their duet. As the rest of the members were on the floor, only Jen remained standing with Jungkook. Like always, Jungkook stared at her with love and desire as he slowly made his way toward her from behind. With his presence behind her and face near her neck, he held her in his arms. She leaned into his arms as she began to sing with her mic.

How much longer before you consume me?

No matter how much I resist, I can't fight what you're doing

He turned her around and tried to get closer but she backed away. Persistent this time, he pulled her straight into his chest as he smirked and held her gaze with the audience screaming at their closeness.

My mind is telling me to break free but my body is freaking out

No, I can't want you, get out of my head

As you love every inch of me you see that I want it too

They continued to dance sensually with him mirroring her movements.

Breath on my neck, I bit off more than I can chew

Reflecting on my choices, I'm wonderin' if there's any way out of this

"Here comes my favorite part!" Yugyeom pointed out with the rest of Got 7 agreeing.

"Are they about to do the spin, this time?" Somi asked the IOI members as they were hopeful.

"Are they gonna do it?" Baekhyun wondered.

"The part is coming~!" Yuji giggled with the rest of GFriend.

"The spin coming?" Mingyu asked in anticipation, leaning forward, studying their movements.

"Let it be the spin," Mina had her fingers crossed.

"Here comes the spin!" Wonho cheered.

The idols got excited and so did the crowd as they began screaming and cheering when JenKook did their signature move. Everyone watched in awe at how they moved and thought about the amount of trust that was needed to pull it off. They weren't called The Golden Duo for nothing.

Jennie was pulled back into his arms as she continued to sing.

I'm losing this battle, I just can't resist. 

The music changed slightly from the original instrumental of BST. Jennie and Jungkook were supposed to dance a little more for this instrumental but they remained close and pressed up against each other with her in his arms. They held each other's strong gaze and suddenly their lips met as they drowned out the loud pandemonium around the venue.

With their eyes closed, Jungkook gently lifted her chin and turned his head to deepen the kiss as they both smiled into it.

With the idols, Bam Bam began shaking Jackson while their jaws were dropped, looking shooked. Jay B and Mark widened their eyes while the rest of Got7 acted chaotic as they all enjoyed every bit of the surprising moment.

"What!? What!?" Jackson shouted as he fell dramatically.

The boys laughed at his reaction. Yugyeom grinned immediately once he saw them kiss and let out a chuckle. It made him proud to see Jungkook be so open about Jennie like this. The amount of guy talks they had about girls and how Jungkook's eyes would light up whenever he mentioned her made Yugyeom understand that these two were serious about each other.  

The kiss fit so well with the performance and her lyrics. But there was no denying the love in their eyes as they looked at each other and how they kissed.

With IOI, various reactions occurred as some dropped their jaws, widened their eyes, covered their mouths, and giggled to themselves. Some filming them even caught a few of them mentioning how happy and cute Jennie looked with Jungkook. With EXO as they watched the kiss unfold, Chanyeol covered his face, giggling at the sight. Baekhyun smiled genuinely, watching Jennie kiss the man she loved dearly.

"Full of surprises," Sehun chuckled.

"Very," Xiumin added.

Twice looked at one another, surprised at the sudden kiss. They were excited to see their signature move but a kiss on top of that? Blown away. Mina and Jihyo glanced at each other with big smiles, happy for their friends.

"Did you think that was going to happen?" Jihyo asked.

"I didn't think it would but look at them. So cute! Jennie truly loves him. She smiles so brightly with him,"

"Mm hm!"

With Monsta X, the boys reacted dramatically and were in awe at their chemistry.

"I was waiting for a kiss!" Hyungwon pointed out.

"Me too, I was like, they have to do something big," Shownu chuckled.

"I wasn't expecting that at all, like damn!" Jooheon exclaimed.

All of GFriend gasped and then began jumping and squealing in their seats after seeing them smooch. Hayoon giggled with the girls and pointed out the kiss.

"It's happening! It's happening! I cannot stay calm about this! Finally~!" Hayoon cheered and began clapping with Yuji and Eunha.

"They kiss so passionately, my gosh," Sowon looked on, amazed.

Seventeen looked surprised while Mingyu and The8 happily smiled, enjoying the fact that their friends kissed openly on stage.

Meanwhile, Hyuna rolled her eyes as her reaction was filmed and she began to frown. She had her fair share of kisses on the MAMA Awards stage but the way the audience was screaming and cheering was a much louder reception than hers over the years.

With Bangtan, the boys were caught by surprise by their kissing. No one said anything about a kiss on stage. Jimin and Taehyung did their best not to freak out as they focused on the performance. The way they grinned and glanced at each other while they remained on the floor. Their hearts felt full to see their ship this open with each other in public. They especially loved how the kiss was a deep and passionate one and not just a short and sweet one.

Yoongi had enlarged his eyes a little at the bold move, wondering if this had been planned privately in advance. Getting over his initial shock, he became amused.

'These kids...' he thought.

Namjoon wasn't too surprised about it. He knew Jennie and Jungkook loved to be extra. He felt proud to see them show affection to each other on stage, not having a care in the world. They looked happy and that was all he wanted for them. To be happy like this privately and publicly. He found himself getting amused as he glanced at their passionate lip lock.

Mnet was having a field day with this. Ratings were definitely through the roof now with this shocking moment along with them raising the bar on this passionate kiss.

Jin and Hobi screamed internally when they saw them smooch. They weren't expecting it and thought they'd go along with their routine. After getting over the shock, it pleased them to see them be this bold in public and thought it fit well with the performance.

Back with Jennie and Jungkook, they pulled away as she bit her bottom lip lightly, returning his smile.

But then...reality set in.

'Oh...oh shit,' They both thought and realized what just happened.

They both remained "In Character" for their performance although it was pretty clear their feelings were showing out. It was bound to happen. The kiss was not planned at all but they moved to each other by instinct. And it felt good. So good. She kissed her boyfriend in front of the entire world, solidifying a MAMA Awards moment.

Remembering her last line, she finally sang the end of her verse.

Only a matter of time before you screw me up and I'll be stuck reminiscing. 

Jungkook had to refrain from kissing her again as they both leaned back in which caused more screaming from the audience to occur. Then they reluctantly pulled away as he blew out air and shook his head a few times, trying to control himself from making out with her on stage.

'We're on stage. We're on stage,' Jungkook reminded himself as he kept backing away from her and went to the next dance position for the song.

With the screaming still occurring around the venue and fansites of Jennie and Jungkook catching their every facial expression, this moment was on its way to going viral.

People on social media were going crazy over the timeline with memes and various tweets:

'JENKOOK STANS RISE!'

'It wasn't even a quick kiss! That kiss was longer than anticipated!'

'My man did NOT want to let her go.'

'They both looked like they didn't want to let each other go. They were both in a trance!''

'We said spin not kiss wtf wtf AHHHHHH!'

'WHY DID SHE KISS HIM!? WAIT!'

'Oh...OH! They playing this BST sexy persona a little TOO well!'

'The way he had the GRIP on her?! Jungkook PLEASE!'

'The way he backed away!? She got him straining!'

'Jungkook saw an opportunity and took it! That smile into the kiss!? Oh, my man wanted to do that for a LONG time!'

'Why is he kissing Jennie!? Why!?'

'I'm fine...I'm totally fine...'

'We shipped the right ship! They kissed! They fucking kissed in front of everybody!'

'Were they acting!? Because that looked too real!'

'Jennie looked so dazed after kissing him!'

'Rookie King Kiss on STEROIDS!'

'That kiss was too American!'

'Do you see how happy the 97 Liners are looking?! Something is up!'

'Cries in Taennie!'

'The kiss that was meant for Taehyung nooooo!'

'And to think this was supposed to be Taehyung in this position instead,'

'How to be Jennie? Had sexy scenes with Taehyung and now gets to kiss Jungkook on stage? Lucky!'

'It's happening! Everybody stay calm! Stay fucking calm!'

'That tension is something that cannot be replicated because I was going crazy watching them on my screen. I was like KISS! And when they did I screamed! I didn't think they would do it!'

'How can I be Jennie in this moment?'

'A stage kiss!? Is this a stage kiss!? This looks so real!'

'Jennie's acting lessons are paying off. She is playing the part well of slowly giving in to temptation. Jungkook is hard to resist!'

'THE TENSION! THE BEDROOM EYES!? OH MY GOD!'

'WTF WTF A KISS!?'

'WAIT A DAMN MINUTE!'

'JENKOOK POR FAVOR!!'

'I have no choice but to Stan. Jennie show me your ways. First it was Taehyung, now it's Jungkook!'

'We got a man down! Jungkook get up! He is obsessed!'

'The way I felt like a third wheel I–'

'Jennie STAND UP! Ma'am you're supposed to be resisting temptation!'

'He down baaaad! What is happening!?'

'AHHHH'

'SKSKSKSKS'

'WTF JUST HAPPENED!?'

'They taking it to a whole new level!'

'OH MY GOD'

'Lives are about to be CHANGED!'

'Y'all can stop being in denial now! JenKook forever! Better than your other ships!'

'They are stressing me out! Can they PLEASE confirm it!?'

'Do you know how long we've waited for a kiss!?'

'JenKook stans we up!'

After performing the rest of the song and heading backstage while Jin and Taehyung do their final act together, Jungkook pulled Jennie into his arms and looked down at her.

"No turning back now," he grinned.

"I know," she grinned back. "I feel relieved and happy,"

"Me too. Kill it out there. I'll see you, soon. I love you,"

He cupped her face and pulled her in for a deep kiss, followed by multiple short kisses.

"I love you, too,"

"Was that planned?" Namjoon laughed.

"It just happened. I don't know who leaned in first," Jennie admitted.

"I don't know either but I'm not complaining," Jungkook added.

Jimin and Hobi jumped excitedly with Yoongi.

"JENKOOK~!" Yoongi shouted, making them all laugh as he started shaking the couple.

"Oh my God..." Jennie chuckled.

"JENKOOK~!" Jimin shouted. "Do you know how happy Tae and I were!? Our ship is soaring! Finally! That kiss was everything! You two know how to make us proud, huh?!"

The staff members had to step in to get them to separate so they could get them to their next location for the main stage while Jennie remained where she was. She waved goodbye and got ready.

"Jennifer."

She turned to see Yoongi.

"Control your emotions out there and wreck her life. You got this," he nodded in reassurance.

"Thanks, I will. See you out there," she nodded and saw him walk away, only leaving Namjoon.

Namjoon smiled down at her and held her hands, giving them a gentle squeeze.

"Jennie, you are undeniable. You are so good that they can't ignore you. This is your moment. Show them who Miss Bangtan is,"

Her eyes got glossy as she looked up at him and broke out into a grin.

"Thank you,"

He pulled her in for a big hug, kissing her forehead.

"I am so proud of you. And I am proud to be your leader. I'll see you out there,"

Once he left, she let out a deep breath and waited for her cue as she gripped her mic. The backup dancers were currently on stage, some in white cloaks and black cloaks while a Bangtan Bomb had been filming her all this time.

'Why did you and Jungkook kiss on stage?'

She was asked as a smile crept up on her lips at their lip lock. Turning to the camera she responded with a wink, "I did say no matter how much I resist I can’t fight what you’re doing. I officially fell into temptation. It was worth it though,"

Once the staff told her she could go on stage, she touched her daisy pin, thinking of G-Dragon. As soon as she got back on that stage...she knew everything was about to change.

"I hope I continue to make you proud," she murmured.

PART 2 OF THIS CHAPTER

[iwriteasfotini]

So, I've been thinking about switching to posting my works in one go (I'm already going to do it for the war years, no question)... To clarify, they are still spread out over the coming year... But instead of posting one chapter per day, they would post on their scheduled day to completion. Then there would be a break before the next work posted in a single day.

This was my original plan before I ever started posting, but the works take SO much effort to write and edit... It made me want to reward myself by spreading out posting. I compromised and scheduled posting to happen daily, which is RARE in the fandom. But I'm wondering if it's really worth it. Because daily posting isn't really as fun as I imagined it would be. ;-) If my work is already complete, why not just post it all at once?

My reserves are that editing takes a lot of work AND I'm unsure if there is a benefit to posting daily on Ao3, like does it keep your work closer to the top of a list or something??? I'll probably still be doing minor editing to my work once it posts. I do this already... but things like a typo here and there (which still happens even when I post daily) would probably be more likely... is it worth it?

I've heard things like people like to download works to read them, which either only works for completed works or doesn't work great for WIPs because you are essentially missing content. I've never read this way because I like to comment, so IDK the specifics.

Posting at once doesn't allow you to subscribe and get those daily reminders to read. Some people like this. I am royally unconcerned about gaining subscribers to my works. They already post super fast relative to once or twice a week posting, and they will be waiting on Ao3 for those who are interested.

I'm thinking about posting the work at once, but promoting it on tumblr one day at a time, so there is still a daily component but it doesn't involve publishing on Ao3...

Thank you for reading my brain dump about this. I know it is ultimately my choice and it doesn't matter what other people think. But being newer to the fandom, I lack a lot of perspective and am always happy to listen! If you have thoughts or comments, please share. I will read them and respond to you.

Also I messed up my first go at this post and had to delete and remake it!

If anyone (@keepmycandleburning @shadowjinx2906 @everythingsbetterunderthestars) wants to reblog this to try and gain more opinions I'd appreciate it!