#if they keep it up i won't be able to make anything

[deramin2]

It's honestly pretty wild that my beloved Art Nouveau toilet paper holder has been in service since at least 1906 (and functions better than anything made in my lifetime as well as being stunningly beautiful), and my stove has been in service since at least 1954 (with more features and beauty Truman modern stoves), and the first CD I bought in 1995 still plays, but there are so many games from my childhood which profoundly shaped me and I will never be able to play them again. I can't even find screenshots for many of them.

I have less than a year to decide between:

"Upgrading" to Windows 11 (which I loathe, and won't run all my software).

Trying to switch back to Linux again (which won't run all my software, and has eventually frustrated me back to using Windows 4 times over 20 years).

Permanently take my desktop offline (which won't run all my software, and be basically useless).

Keep Windows 10 and just rawdog using the malware-ad filled modern internet with no security patches ever again (worked IT helpdesk with an interest in infosec for too many years for this to not give me heart palpitations).

In the 1970s-1980s my dad worked as a backend systems programmer for a major bank on IBM mainframes. They wrote everything themselves in Assembly Language. In the 1980s he wrote a utility program with a date function that got widely used, and had the foresight to think "This could still be in use far into the future, so I better use a 4-digit date." It was still in use in 2000, and as a result the bank has to do very few Y2K upgrades to its backend systems.

In 2012, an old friend who still worked there for so frustrated at contractors saying they couldn't speed up some network login library feature because their preferred modern programming language didn't support it. It was taking over an hour to run. They didn't seem to believe something more efficient had ever been possible.

Finally out of frustration, that guy broke out Dad's old utility (that also processed partitioned data sets) had a and wrote a working demo. It maxed out the entire modern mainframe CPU, but accomplished the task in 1 min 15 seconds. It wasn't put back into production, of course, but it did effectively make the point that the specs were not unreasonable and if the fancy new programming language couldn't do it, then use another damn language that does work.

I did IT in a biolab a decade ago that still had Windows XP computers because it was the only operating system that could run the proprietary software to control the $20k microscopes. Which worked perfectly fine and we didn't have the budget to replace. They had to be on the network because the sneakernet violates biohazard lab safety rules, and there weren't enough modern computers in the lab to sneakernet the files through those without waiting for someone else to finish using it, and no one's work could afford the delays. I left before we fully solved that one, but a lot of firewall rules were involved (if we ever lost the install CDs we were fully fucked because the microscope company went out of business at least a decade earlier).

So yeah, the old magic persists because it worked perfectly fine and it's stupid capitalist planned obsolescence that convinces people the old magic is obsolete. We could actually just keep patching perfectly serviceable orbs forever if we valued ongoing maintenance.

“The old magic persists thanks to it’s unfathomable power.”

No, the old magic persists because the new magic can’t run the legacy spells I need to do my job, and keeps trying to install spirits I don’t want or need onto my orb.

[digitaldaydreamm]

Angst with childhood friend reader pls pls pls pls

unspoken claim

rafe x childhood friend!reader

| summary | rafe won't accept your help

warnings: angst, a little bit of cursing, mentions of blood and fighting

a/n: your wish is my command. here's a little bit of angst for youuu, this one is kind of short...

masterlist

⋆｡𖦹 °.🐚⋆❀˖°

The house was dark when you stepped inside, the only light coming from the faint glow of a lamp in the living room. The quiet felt heavier than usual, like something was pressing down on your chest, making it harder to breathe.

Then you saw him.

Rafe was slouched on the couch, one arm draped over his stomach, the other resting against the back of the couch like he’d just stopped caring about holding himself up. His knuckles were split, dried blood crusted over the cuts, and a deep bruise stretched across his cheekbone, dark and swollen. A gash split his lower lip, red and raw, and his shirt was torn at the collar, exposing more bruises along his collarbone.

Your stomach twisted.

“Rafe.”

He didn’t react. You stepped closer, your heartbeat hammering in your ears.

“Rafe.”

His eyes flickered open slightly before shutting again, like keeping them open was too much effort. His head tilted back further against the couch.

“Go home, kid.”

Your jaw clenched, “That’s all you have to say?”

Silence.

Frustration crawled up your spine. You crouched down in front of him, hands resting on his thighs, your eyes searching his face.

“What happened?”

Rafe let out a slow breath, controlled, detached.

“Nothing.”

You scoffed. “Nothing? Yeah, because you just happened to get the shit beaten out of you for no reason?”

His jaw ticked, fingers twitching against his stomach.

“Let it go.”

The way he said it—low, exhausted, final—made something uneasy settle in your chest.

“No.” Your voice was sharper now, pushing back against the indifference in his. “You don’t get to do this. You don’t get to sit there, bleeding all over yourself, and act like I’m the one being unreasonable for caring.”

He still didn’t look at you.

“...I wanted to.” The words were blunt, matter-of-fact.

“You wanted to?”

His eyes barely opened, just a sliver of blue catching the dim light.

“I wanted to hit something.” His voice was hoarse, but steady. “And someone gave me a reason.”

The way he said it—like it was just another night, like it didn’t even matter—made your hands curl into fists.

“God, Rafe,” you breathed, shaking your head. “You can’t keep doing this."

His lips twitched, but it wasn’t a smile.

“I know.”

Something about the way he said it made your chest ache.

A heavy silence settled between you.

“I hate this,” you murmured.

Rafe shifted, just slightly. His fingers flexed against his stomach like he wanted to reach out to you.

You didn’t miss it. But he didn’t say anything.

You swallowed hard, the weight of the moment pressing down on you like a vice. Rafe just sat there, bruised and bloodied, looking like he had already accepted whatever this was—whatever he was—as something inevitable.

“You’re not even going to tell me the real reason why?” you pressed, voice quieter this time.

Rafe finally cracked an eye open fully, his gaze landing on you. His expression was unreadable, but something flickered behind his eyes—something too brief to catch.

“No."

Your throat tightened. You didn’t even know why you were expecting anything else.

Rafe had always been like this. Closed off, stubborn. You were used to the walls he put up, the sharp edges he refused to soften. But this? This was different.

This wasn’t just him being reckless or angry. This was him seeking it out.

And you didn’t know how to stop it.

“Do you even hear yourself?” you whispered, barely able to keep your voice steady. “You wanted to hit something? That’s not normal, Rafe.”

He exhaled sharply, head tipping back against the couch again.

“You don’t have to be here.”

Your chest ached.

“You think that’s the problem?” you asked, incredulous. “That I don’t have to be here?”

Silence.

“I want to be here, Rafe,” you bit out. “I always want to be here. But you—” You broke off, shaking your head. “You don’t even let me help you.”

He let out a slow breath, like he was bracing himself.

“I can’t.”

The quiet admission made your chest ache.

You knew what he meant.

He couldn’t let you in. He couldn’t let himself need you the way you knew he did. It scared him more than anything else.

Your fingers twitched against his legs. Carefully, hesitantly, you reached out, pressing your palm over his bruised knuckles resting on his stomach.

Rafe didn’t move. Didn’t pull away.

And you wondered if, just for tonight, that was enough.

[strwberri-milk]

Hi! I love your headcanons. Can I ask for Zayne and Sylus reaction to a homeless MC?? Like they pretends to enter the building but waits for their love to leave, so MC can go and sleep in a tent at the park... Becayse the rent went to high and MC couldn't pay it anymore and didn't want to bother their love. How they would react??

He'd notice when some of your stories don't quite align. At first Zayne thinks that you're just a fan of your privacy and that you don't yet feel comfortable letting him into your personal space. He's not going to pry or anything but if you went from suddenly inviting him over to stopping then he's really going to be suspicious.

It takes a bit of time for him to get it out of you When you explain what happened to you he listens emphatically. You can try and convince him that you'll be okay and as long as you keep working you should be able to save up again but he won't let you. He doesn't feel comfortable at all knowing that you're sleeping outside without anywhere safe to be.

He's going to convince you to move in with him, telling you that he has more than enough room for you. He'll manage to convince you by telling that you're doing it for his sake, not yours. Not knowing where you are and if you're safe stresses him out so you really are doing him a favour. Things won't change between the two of you if you don't want it to, and he's more than happy to make it a roommate situation if you're uncomfortable with the prospect of moving in this quickly. If you don't mind then you guys get to slip into a more domestic type of relationship which he's more than happy to do.

Sylus confronts you when he figures out you aren't staying at your home. He's not going to ask why you aren't home, but only if you're willing to return. You don't have to tell him that you stopped being able to afford the rent because regardless of your answer he's going to make you move in with him. He's been wanting to anyway.

If you don't want to live in the N109 Zone with him then he'll simply buy another apartment for you and tell you that it's for when he has business in Linkon. He's already got one there and you know he does but he tells you he sold it to buy this one instead because it's nicer (read: has everything you've ever liked about his home). He doesn't impose himself on your living space if you don't want him to.

You can try and pay him some form of rent but it fails miserably. Any money you try to give him just ends up back in your pocket somehow - whether it be him slipping cash into your pocket or buying you gifts. You won't be able to give him anything at all - taking care of you is one of his favourite things to do after all.

[postmoe]

I find it attractive of a beta or alpha get turned into an omega if they get fucked to much. So what about yandere alpha geshu lin x beta/alpha male reader x yandere alpha jiyan. Or yandere Mydei x beta/alpha male Reader x yandere alpha Phainon. Reader getting turned into an omega so they can keep him all to themselves and maybe baby trap him 🤭.

dude i have so many beta fantasies it's not even funny. thank you for this opportunity.

non-con, abo, male reader, beta -> omega reader,

.

It was always the three of you; Phainon, Mydei, (Y/n). You went through training together, fought the hardest battles together, everyone revered you like you were unstoppable.

Well, everyone respected you in a passive/aggressive way because you were covered in the musk of two supreme alphas. Unfortunately for you, in the womb, you never grew to the next stage from being a beta.

Betas were pretty rare now, they started off as the dominant second gender, but as time grew so did the power of evolution. Everyone starts off in the womb as a beta, then months down the line you unlock your social status. Sometimes, you just get stuck as the runt. There have been few cases of people opening their second gender later in life, though only within a very specific fate of events.

It's not all bad. Apparently, Mydei's and Phainon's scent was so extreme that a lot of people couldn't stand near them for a certain amount of time. Alpha's get antsy, compliment or aggressive. Omegas have gone into heat on the spot, rolling over motionless as their hormones take over. Now, they're pretty good at controlling their smell, or so everyone says.

It never bothered you to begin with, your nose not suited to judge others. You couldn't read emotions if it wasn't present on their face, which in this day and age is more of a talent than anything; at least, that's what Phainon says to make you feel better.

For a beta to get this far in life is pretty astonishing. You realise you had a lot of help from your two friends. They've been able to sniff you out when you're in danger, or their scent that lingers on your clothes is enough to stop any intelligent bandit or monster. However, even when you're feeling down about it, even when the world criticizes you for 'using' two alphas to your advantage, they both have been there to keep you reeled in.

"Why do you even bother trying to lie to us," Mydei huffs, crossing his arms over his puffed out chest, "You have a smell, too. It's not like we don't know what you're feeling."

"That's unfair," you sigh, shoulders slumping, "Maybe I just don't want to talk about it, ever think of that?"

Phainon nods, his arms coming to drape over your shoulders from behind, rubbing his cheek against yours, "Everyone is allowed to have their secrets."

You roll your eyes, going back to polishing your sword with the rag while he lounges against you, "It's not even a secret, just the usual shit." You go silent for a moment, feeling their eyes burn holes into for more information. It should have been common knowledge by now that you won't get out of anything from them, so you gently place your sword down groan, "Fine! I walked past one of your fan groups today. An omega was saying how I was only holding back your true potential, that with me on the battlefield then you can't go all out."

Both of them opened their mouths to speak, you held up your hand to zip them shut.

"And before you say anything; yes, I know that I'm strong too. Yes, I know I can fight. Yes, I know they're just 'jealous' that I get to hang around you." You can't make eye contact with either of them, knowing that you might just crack if you do, "... It doesn't always help. I'm okay with that, though. This is the life I chose and I can deal with all the shit thrown my way."

Phainon buried his face in your neck, sniffling into one of your more sensitive parts, the scent glands. You shivered from the contact, he didn't seem to mind as he practically cried, "You're so strong, (Y/n)! But you know, you still have to take care of your mental health, too. I think you should stay away from those people for a while."

Mydei stood from his spot on the grass and walked over, ruffling your hair with his hand before dragging it down your face and to trace your neck, "We haven't been around because of the recent attacks, so our scent is waning from you. Here, we'll ward them off."

You shook your head out of their grip and rolled to the side, away from them, "I don't need you to scare anyone away by smothering me. I think your scent only makes them more mad."

"It's natural biology for an alpha to cover what's theirs in their smell, you can't just tell us to stop," Phainon argues, shrugging like it's the most obvious thing.

With a laugh, you stand and pick up your sword, "Since when am I yours?"

They both silently looked to each other, communicating in a language you would never understand. Mydei tells you, "You've been our beta longer than you've been alone."

"Yep~" Phainon teases, "Should have thought about that before you became our friend."

Yeah, right. One day these two will find their omegas, they'll create a beautiful family and you can be the cool, beta uncle that showers the kids in annoying gifts to rile up their parents. "Sure, whatever," you dismiss, now taking on an offensive stance, "So, we sparring or what?"

...

Storm season is fast approaching in this part of the land. You three had been sent out patrol the far, outer lands on a 'boys' camping trip'. The trek made you sweaty, the days humid and the nights cold, yet you didn't stop until you reached an open cave near the top of the mountain.

Forests surround you, rushing rivers and falls heard in the distance, and the sounds of insects chirping were drowning your ears. You had abandoned your shirt long ago, rolling yourself in insect repellent that did well to make your two companions scrunch up their noses in distaste.

As you set down the heavy bags in the cave, the sun setting in the distance, you noticed some faded, rock drawings on the walls. Walking up to them, you see crude images of stick figure deaths, a chimera with little hearts around it and a spurting dick. Phainon placed his hand on your shoulder, "Mydei drew the penis."

You both look over to see him skulling his sack of water, giving you both the middle finger. You purse your lips, "Even though I've known you for so long, it's always weird to see such a childish side of you."

After setting up camp, you realise how much you may have missed when you weren't able to accompany them on missions. This place is gorgeous, and they only tell tales of greater environments, it left you feeling a sense of awe and a pang of sadness. When they laugh together, bicker, playfully shove at each other, you can see it the way everyone else sees it.

Two, great alphas Mydei and Phainon - plus you. Little, ol' beta you.

It's nothing to get worked up over. Not a big deal, not an issue at all. You notice they've stopped talking and are looking at you with concern. Fuck. Why are you having this crisis now of all times? They can definitely smell you, they know what you're feeling and they're expecting an answer.

You smile at them widely, "Sorry, I just got lost in a daydream." Can they smell when you lie, too? If so, they speak nothing of it.

...

Being able to swim in such beautiful, clean water was a luxury you didn't know you needed. The baths and streams around Okhema were amazing, there's no doubt about it. Hot springs sent from natural sources, lotions and soaps created from the best ingredients, but this... This was something altogether new.

The water was a cold that made your muscles relax, the flavour refreshing and dare you say, curative. The sound was a delightful white noise of rushing water and splashing ripples from either of you or the fish that swim by.

On the shore, Phainon was the last to disrobe, the three of you deciding to skinny dip as a fun, good morning. You greet him with a smile as he resurfaces from bombing into the water, shaking your face of stray droplets, "Are you sure it's alright for us all to be here? I really think one of us should keep watch at the cave."

He lays on his back, closing his eyes while he floats around you, "Don't stress, there are others at points around the outer city. Someone is always watching from one direction or another."

"I see... I guess I'm just wor-" your voice is cut off as your ankle is suddenly grabbed and you're yanked down under the surface. You see the blurry image of Mydei, the red tattooed lines on his skin the main stand out for the fuzzy, underwater alpha.

The two of you duke it out - poorly - until you both resurface and you're gasping for air. He huffs out a breath of his own, hiding any semblance of exhaustion, "You're going to need to fight better than that if you want to get on our level."

As if coming to your rescue, Phainon swims over to him, "Oh, please, as if it's normal for someone to be capable of fighting under water." He then winks to you before shoving the blonde's head down, effectively drowning him out.

The three of you relax around the falls, floating idly in the water side-by-side. You think you could fall asleep, except your nose twitches at an interesting smell. You've smelt it before, very faintly and only when they really push it. What can be excruciatingly stunning to others, you only get a whiff of as a beta; the smell of these alphas.

Mydei and Phainon are a rare sort, extremely strong and capable of power beyond mosts comprehension. A few people are rare like that, some omegas even being too intoxicating for the outside world. It's a pleasant smell, to you, something you not-so-secretly indulge in whenever you get the chance. It also makes you feel slightly more normal.

You wade over and gently rest your head on the upper part of Mydei's stomach, closing your eyes and sighing happily, "I don't get why people can't be around you guys if you're too strong. I like your smell."

Phainon playfully pouts at you choosing Mydei, coming over to join you and rest his head on his chest. He inhales the Kremnoan's scent, smiling serenely, "Omega's and Alpha's never really stop developing their senses until their mid 30's. The older you get, even smells like perfumes can become too much, let alone the emotions of someone with tremendous power."

"Does that mean you guys aren't holding back anymore if I can smell you?"

Mydei moves a wet hand to pet your head, "We don't need to hold back up here."

"Besides," Phainon gazes at you with a fondness in his eyes, "It's nice to share something so personal with someone close, don't you think?"

They can't just relax like this around anyone, and since you all spend most of your time in the city, you hardly get a chance to get a whiff of them. A giddy smile decorates your face, your eyes closing as you relax once more, "Yeah, I agree."

...

On the third day you notice something odd. Your friend's seem to be more agitated, little offsets leading to snarling and biting, every twig snap or rustle has them staring in that direction in case of a particular threat.

You've never seen them like this.

They must be stressed by all the work that's been unloaded onto them. An argument broke out five minutes ago about something you didn't understand, the two deciding to take a walk to cool off and collect more firewood. You decide that this is the perfect time to help them out, picking up a sword and attaching it to your waist before heading out on a patrol. When you get back, they can relax at the duties already being fulfilled.

You don't know the area very well, however, you did accompany them the past couple of nights so you have an idea of where to go. You're not too stressed about getting lost, the trail somewhat visible to someone like you, who has been taught overcome these kinds of obstacles. What you didn't expect was that it gets darker quicker under the canopy of trees.

It appeared you had an hour of daylight left, yet only fifteen minutes later and you noticed a dramatic change. The mountains are certainly an interesting place to be, you're usually stationed closer to the city and nearer the fallen towns.

With the darkness comes fauna that arouse at night, a particular croak gaining your attention. You crouch down with interest, seeing a teal coloured frog with a lighter stomach hop into a puddle. It was smaller than the palm of your hand, yet the sound it made was so loud you would never expect it to come from such a tiny creature.

Your admiration was halted as you hear heavy thumping from deeper in the brush. It's fast, leaves and sticks being moved and thrown out of the way to make room for whatever is coming at you. You quickly draw your sword and take a defensive stance, readying for whatever may be in store.

If it's a boar or something similar, you could climb one of the thicker trees and make your way around by jumping branches. If it's something more like a giant bush cat, then you would have no choice but to fight it.

Turns out, it was neither. Before you had the opportunity to lay eyes on it, there is ablur of movement and your weapon is thrusted from your hand, flying off and landing into the dark distance. You're immediately incapacitated, wrist close to snapping and arm yanked back as you're brought to your knees.

Mydei is snarling aggressively in your ear, holding you down like some convict trying to escape. He spits his words like venom, "What the fuck did you think you were doing? Are you stupid?! Leaving the nest like that wandering off on your own!"

You cry out in pain as he tightens his grip, the sound and pheromones you let off making him back off slightly but not letting go.

Before you can ask what the hell is going on, Phainon appears behind you and walks around so he can kneel at your front. He tenderly cradles your face and looks over you for any other injuries, "Don't hurt him, Mydei. He made a stupid decision but it wasn't his fault."

A breath of relief leaves you when he finally lets go. You slump and cradle your aching arm, flinching when Mydei falls to his knees behind you and resting his face in the crook of your neck. He mumbles into your flesh, "Why did you leave like that? You could have gotten hurt."

With a new found annoyance, you flick Phainon's hands away from you and shrug the other off your back, "What the fuck??? Why are you both acting like I just up and left?"

"Because you did up and leave," Mydei growls, only halting when he and Phainon meet with a hard glare. He tuts and stands, making sure you have nowhere to run if you decided to flee, "We should have just been outright with him from the beginning."

You didn't like the sound of that. Without a word, you look to Phainon for an answer, Mydei is acting too impulsive for your liking right now. Phainon stands before you, both of them now crowding any escape with how close they are, "In truth, we brought you up here because we knew our ruts were coming and we wanted you with us."

"P-Pardon?" It was so incredulous you were sure you heard wrong. But, what else could he have said? "You do know what I am, right? We've only known each other for a couple of decades so be honest if you need a reminder."

Mydei scoffs and grabs you by the back of your shirt, hefting you to your tippy toes to growl, "Our Beta's got jokes. If you can jest then you can mate."

"WHAT?!" You kick your feet comically in the air, trying to find some sort of purchase, "I can't mate - I physically cannot mate! Not with an Alpha!!"

Phainon chimes in giddily, "Two Alphas! Don't worry, we'll ensure you're thoroughly pregnant by the end of this rut."

Body limits aside, being a beta means your reproductive organs aren't open to be used. They're sitting inside you, dormant. For some reason, you don't think they see that as a drawback, instead viewing your biology as more of a challenge to be tackled.

...

Day six and you're sore. Your legs, which have been in every position possible. Your arms, which are restrained when they're doing anything that's not fucking you. Your poor, poor hole, which hasn't been dry in days. Your oversensitive cock, now you can't tell what liquid comes out, your last orgasm streaming like piss on the rock below.

Phainon drags his hot, wet tongue up your neck, moaning as he slips his erected cock into you again. Your mouth hangs open, arse clenching when he's stopped by his knot hitting your rim. He's got you in a full nelson, your thighs over his own, a sound of discomfort coming from you at the stretch of his knot trying to enter you.

He shudders, lightly humping upwards, "Do you smell that, Mydei? He's changing."

Mydei flops his own dick in your face, tracing his leaking tip along the bone of your cheek before he slips his length between your lips, "How interesting. All our darling beta needed was a little push."

Your eyes roll into the back of your head as they fuck you again, your pretty, little hole gaping ever larger to accommodate them.

...

The cold, wet soil near the falls was blissful on your overheating skin. You've never felt this hot before, you assume it's a fever coming on from being under these two for however many days now. Mydei has you on your back, tongue swirling and mouth slurping at your puckered arse.

It was nice to just relax and be tended to, as fucked up as that seems. Phainon was behind him, washing his own body and admiring the scene before him.

Mydei licks a stripe from your hole, up the length of your taint and to your flaccid cock. He coos patronisingly, kissing the sensitive tip and making you jolt, "Poor sweetheart, have we been too rough with you?"

It's too little too late to ask you that now. You stick with your mission of giving them the silent treatment unless necessary, turning your head away and closing your eyes, thinking back on the coolness of the soil.

Until, "A-Ahh! S-Stop!" You moan, hands going to his hair and yanking as hard as you can, trying to stop him from swallowing your cock and drinking it over and over again. The way his tongue and cheeks move against your flesh has you throbbing and twitching in his mouth. "I can't, I can't," you breathe, swaying your head side to side as if to deny the oncoming torture.

But you can't, even half-hard he has you spurting your cum down his throat. You hold his head down with each half-hearted thrust, only to pull again before another tingling jolt of your hips.

When you can open your eyes again, you pleadingly gaze to Phainon, who had paused his washing to stare solely at you both. His eyes dart to meet yours, mind working overtime to bring him out of his daze and pull lightly on his companion, "Hey, save some for me, okay? Let him recuperate a bit."

Mydei flies his elbow back, not getting off you. At this, Phainon clicks his tongue against the roof of his mouth and locks the blonde's head with his elbow, flipping him back into the water.

You take a deep breath as they start to wrestle. Now you can rest again, you rarely get time to yourself now. When they sleep, sometimes, you're still plugged with one of them inside you, cockwarming throughout the night. Otherwise, when they go hunting, you might be tied tightly inside the cave, though there is usually at least one of them with you.

A gentle rain starts, the drops hitting your heated face. You need this, the rain a lot cooler than the falls as it collects in the sky. Lately, you've been feeling weird, unwell, hot. It's unlike anything you've ever experienced before.

Not to mention their scent. The boys' sweat, bodies, just everything about them is becoming less off putting and more desirable than ever. If you're honest, you're scared with what's happening.

...

They had both left you in the cave, the rain a perfect mask for hunting good meat right now.

"Need to keep our darling's energy up!"

You're not sure when, but some time after they left you were reeling in some sort of pain. Not like being slashed by a sword, or thrown by an enemy, but more like a strange punch to the gut. It blossomed within you and bloomed around your body, effecting your head and pelvis the most.

Breathing became difficult, your chest rising and falling quickly, you couldn't focus on how to fix it. No, not with the gnawing pain and discomfort in your gut.

You had wormed your way towards the entrance but the rope only let you go so far. They didn't give you enough leeway to get more than halfway through the cave, which meant you couldn't get any rain to cool you down.

What you did find, however, was their sashes they didn't wear today. Your nose twitched, and you reached your tied wrists over so your fingers could grab the red fabric and scrunched it to your face, moaning in absolute delight. Quickly, you secured the blue and gold one and weaved it between your legs, covering as much of your body as you could.

You're not sure when they came back, only realising they were standing ominously at the entrance of the cave when their musk started to seep heavier than the sashes you were breathing. The rain hadn't let up, both of them drenched and Mydei holding the antlers of a dead deer beside him.

Your jaw trembles, tears running down your cheeks as you whimper, "What's happening to me?"

It's only when you talk do they enter, dropping the carcass to the side before carefully kneeling down to cradle you. Your ropes are torn off and you sit between the two men, both leaning so they can run their teeth over the scent glands in your neck.

You whine as Mydei gently nibbles you, a low groan causing your cock to leak rivulets down your shaft, "Perfect for biting now."

Phainon reaches to gasp your cock, smoothly jerking up the length before circling his fingers along the glands, "I knew your unawaken second gender was this. You just had to be an omega, what with the way you were taunting us; begging to be bred."

Unawaken... Omega? No, that's-

"Hah~ Please..." You lift your hips when you feel fingers enter inside you, easily stretching you open now.

Mydei chuckles deeply, grinning at all the new possibilities going through his head, "Perfect for knotting now, too."

[lady-of-tearshed]

Coming out

@sjmprideweek

Day 5: Family

Pairing: Azriel centered, but mention of Azris.

Summary: Azriel announces that he's seeing someone to his family.

Word count: 1.5k words

Warnings: Someone drinking alcohol, someone choking on alcohol (no one dies), innuendo of sex.

Dividers made by @tsunami-of-tears 💙

“I've recently discovered I was into males.” 

That, Azriel concluded, was definitely one way to get his family's attention. 

Eight pairs of eyes pivoted in his direction. Only Nyx seemed unbothered by this revelation, far too young and carefree to give a damn about anything else than the colorful fruit puree splattered in front of him. 

Cassian, always the biggest mouth of the Inner Circle, was the first to break the silence. “It's a… new discovery?” 

“Yes.” 

Cassian, as difficult to imagine, looked at his brother with an even more confused expression. He opened his mouth and closed it a few times, and then the look on his face turned from one of confusion to one of mid-amusement. “Weren't you already into guys?” 

This time, it was Azriel's turned to he confused. “What?” 

“Yeah, you know,” Cassian started counting on his fingers. “The guy that bought you a drink at Rita's a few weeks ago? The one you wouldn't stop looking into his big russet eyes. I thought you had gone back with him at the end of the night. Or the other one, freckled one, with the slumped rear, last month. The one that bought you the coffee and wrote his name on the cup-” 

“Cassian,” Rhysand half-scolded his brother, stopping him in his overflowing river of information, and saving Azriel from the embarrassment. 

Azriel couldn't believe how blind he had been to all the cues of his male attraction. It seemed obvious to him, now, that someone not into males wouldn't have admitted to his brother how scrumptious the ass of the male from the cafe near The Rainbow was. That, right there, had been one hell of a clue Azriel should've picked on. That and the fact that even though he didn't, he had wished, only for a short, confusing moment, that he had gone home with that other male from Rita's a few weeks ago. 

Azriel probably would've discovered his male attraction a long time ago (probably before Eris had wrapped his Cauldron blessed lips around his shaft) if he had been able to pull his head away from work and his own personal worries, he realized. 

“Well next time we go to Rita's, I'll make sure you go home with a pretty male,” Cassian announced, dismissing Rhysand's warning with a wave of his hand. 

“Oh,” Azriel blinked, furrowing his brows as he tried to look for the right words. “That won't be necessary.” He settled with, hoping that Cassian (by some kind of miracle) would just drop the subject and move on with his life-

“Why, of course it is! Maybe that would help you get that broomstick out of your ass-” 

“No.”

“Or some other lucky male’s ass?”

“I'm… already seeing someone.” 

Amren choked on her wine. Morrigan, as swift as an arrow, jolted up from her seat to pat her friend’s back and telling her to keep coughing. Amren’s face, still red from the gulp that half went down the wrong pipe, turned slowly into the blond’s direction. The glare she threw at her friend seemed to come from the deepest depths of the Cauldron. If a look could kill, Morrigan would’ve been slayed on the spot. 

Once recovered from her near death experience, Amren spoke up. “Do they know you’re gay?”

Cassian frowned. “Actually, doesn’t that make him bisexual? Since he’s into males and-.”

“Do they know.” Amren repeated, her voice as sharp as Azriel’s most treasured weapon.

“Of course they do,” He answered quite coldly. He was half hurt that his family would even assume that he would be cold-hearted enough to be romantically involved with someone and hide parts of himself from them. Besides, why was this any of their business? He started to wonder why he even cared being honest with them if it only meant for him to receive such a cold reaction. “Also, they are a male. And no, Cas, I do not think that makes me bisexual. Well, yes. Perhaps,” He looked down at his plate, moved some vegetables around as he tried to figure it out. “Honestly, I don’t know. I’m still figuring it out.” 

Some looks were exchanged amongst the people gathered at this table. After what felt like a never ending period of heavy and uncomfortable silence, someone’s chair scrapped on the floor. 

Azriel looked up to see Rhysand moving around the table, and before he could analyze wether it was to throttle him or something else, his brother’s arms were circling his neck in a firm, yet gentle embrace. 

“I’m glad you found someone,” Rhysand said, grunting a little when Cassian joined the group hug, his weight crushing both males.

“When can we meet him?” Cassian asked, his tone nearly buzzing with excitement.  

Azriel tensed. “I don’t think it would be a good idea.” 

“Why?” Nesta asked cautiously from her seat, where she still sat. 

“Az…” Feyre rectified quickly. “We wouldn’t have any reasons why meeting him wouldn’t be a good idea-”

“Is he unkind?” Nesta blatantly ignored her sister’s too-soft approach. 

“No! No,” Azriel quickly answered, half afraid the eldest Archeron would bite his head off if he avoided the topic. “He is very kind… when you get to know him.” 

“Then I don’t see any problem there,” Feyre offered him a comforting smile.

Azriel’s insides felt like they were on fire. He knew he’d have to announce the inevitable truth sooner than later. His family was nosy enough to figure it out by themselves quickly, and telling them before they could find out would be preferable and cause less damage. 

“We will accept this male into our lives no matter what, brother,” Rhysand squeezed his shoulder. 

“So long as he treats you right,” Added Cassian, his eyes glimmering with emotions and unshed tears. 

“He’s-” Azriel bit his lip, hesitating. “He’s from another Court. He’s… different.” 

“Like I said,” Rhysand’s eyes bore into Azriel’s, his face and heart as open and honest as can be. “We’ll accept him, no matter what.” 

“Even if he’s a High Lord?” 

At that, Cassian tensed, his eyes narrowed. “Mother’s tits Az… Don’t tell me it’s Helion? You know he has a…” Cassian paused, his eyes traveling to the other side of the table, where a red-headed male sat calmly beside Elain. “Reputation.” 

Azriel almost laughed out loud. Helion was indeed one lovely High Lord, but he was not the one who fought to earn his heart. He opened his mouth to finally be honest about who that mysterious male he’s seeing is when someone does it for him. 

“It’s Eris, isn’t it?” 

All eyes turned to Nesta, then widened when they looked back in Azriel’s direction only to see the slightest shade of pink coloring the Illyrian’s cheeks. 

“Yes, it is,” As if it needed clarifications, Azriel added. “Eris. Eris Vanserra.” 

And for a moment, Azriel actually started to worry about Rhysand’s poor, old heart. 

“Oh, Azriel!” Nesta exclaimed, “Those are wonderful news!”

She nearly crashed into him, shoving the two males aside to take her turn at hugging him. 

As she hugged him, Azriel’s shadows informed him of the look that meant something similar to ‘If you dare say something hurtful about it, I’ll kill you’ Nesta gave Rhysand. When Nesta slowly untangled herself from Azriel, Rhysand cleared his throat.

“Well,” He said, his pale looking more pale than usual and his voice sounding shaky. Rhysand wanted to rip the earth in half and curse the Mother for his brother’s awful taste in males, but he didn’t. He was a male of honor, and already assured his brother (two times, no less) that he would accept this male no matter what. So. “Do you… Like him?”

“Yes, I think I do,” Azriel said, his heart open and honest. A strange, yet positive, feeling wrapped around his heart and made his face turn warm every time he thought of the male. “We’re not really something. Just… seeing each other and figuring things out as we go.” 

“If he breaks your heart,” Cassian snarled, looking at the other Vanserra present in the room as if he had personally hurt him, “I’ll make sure his heart will be slowly and painfully ripped out of his pretty neck. Then I’ll feed it to his Gods damned dog.” 

“He won’t,” Lucien spoke up for the first time since the beginning of this family gathering. “When a Vanserra loves, or cares, it does fiercely,” His gaze turned to Elain and softened. “And unconditionally.” 

Azriel held back from rectifying that what was between him and Eris wasn’t love, but… The more he thought about it, the more he started thinking that, yes, it could be love, It could grow as something fierce, and unconditional. But for now, they were figuring themselves out. 

“Then it is more than we could ask for,” Feyre stated, her voice firm and true. “We’re all delighted for you, Azriel.”

“Yes,” Rhysand said, smiling. Cassian nodded alongside him. “We are.”

And that was more than anything Azriel could’ve hoped for, his family’s love and support.

ACOTAR general taglist: @mybestfriendmademe @lilah-asteria @acotar-lover @paige0103

Azris taglist: @g00seg1rl

[ethereal-moonglow]

┊┊┊✧ ⁺               •

┊┊❁ུ۪۪⸙ ͎.

┊┊.

┊ ➶ ｡˚  　　°

*.           *    ·

Legends untold by time, can you hear them now?

Matchup exchange with @tillichan

Zayne was currently looking for places to take his girl out this weekend. He was busy the past few days and wanted to make it up to her. He was scrolling through his phone as he waited for the test of his patient to arrive. He was looking at various places with animals or some sort of garden so they’d be able to sit back and relax, maybe have a picnic as the two of them talk about their week. His eyes scan each option that popped up. Each of the choices had so many pros and cons, it was hard to settle for one. He wanted this date to be the best. He won't settle for less. From petting zoos to flower gardens and fruit picking, he tried scanning each location for reviews and did research if it was ethical. He won't bring his girl to an unethical zoo or garden! She’d be furious and their date would be ruined.

But before he could commit to a location he was pulled away to tend to another patient, with a sigh he reluctantly went. And there goes the cycle of never ending patients and surgeries. And of course they were short staffed this week! Oh how he hates and loves his job. No matter how hard the job is, there is only one person in his mind. He needs to stay strong, he has a date to plan. He needs to make things perfect! As a reconciliation for the lack of attention this week. Well, he was going to plan it but the extra load made it hard to sit down and find a place. 

The day of the date eventually came rolling around, and to say he was unprepared was an understatement. He was usually okay with spontaneous dates but he feels as if he had failed her somehow. He wanted her to enjoy the date and it had to be perfect. He was pacing around the room, phone in hand as he continued browsing. He should've turned down that one patient that did not have any serious ailments. He could have planned this better! His mind was swirling with all sorts of last minute date ideas. Anything to make sure this date was perfect! What he didn't realize is that time slipped past his fingers and she was now here.

“Zayne, are you okay?” She asked as she gently reached out to hold his arms. He jolted at the contact, his eyes widened in surprise. What time was it? Why was she so early? His head immediately turned to the side to look at the clock. His usually well kept hair was messy and even his polo was down two buttons. It was already time? He ran his hand through his hair. God, he didn't achieve anything.  “We can canc-” but before she could even respond, Zayne straightened up and fixed his collar. “No, no, there is no need to cancel. It's just that,” He hesitated after that.

She gave him a look of encouragement, as if telling him to continue. His expression softened as she leaned closer to him. He sighed, not being able to deny the sweetheart in his arms. He wrapped his arms around her. “It's just that I wanted this date to be perfect, and yet I have nothing planned.” He leaned in and kissed her forehead. “I haven't been present. So I wanted to do something for you. To show you that I'm still here.” He looked away, almost embarrassed about what he said. But instead of anger, the only reply he got was a soft laugh. “Any date is perfect, because you and I are together” He couldn't help but smile at her words

More under the cut!

❥︎  I decided to pick Zayne for a few reasons and one of them is the fact that you want to live a calm and peaceful life. And with Zayne? That’s practically the goal. I mean he is a doctor and STILL manages to make time for you. 

❥︎ Unlike the hunter, the artist, the mafia leader, and the soldier, Zayne is the calmest (And less stressful) of them all.

❥︎ I also picked him cause of his temperment! He's calm and quiet. He's gentle and would definitely vibe with your energy.

❥︎ Not only that I keep seeing the two of you like on this cute date where he takes you wherever you want and you just dragging him around happily. 

❥︎ The two of you would definitely be a good couple! Like teh couple that everyone is envious of caus eit’s obvious that the two of you are so in love 

❥︎ Not only that I feel like he also would be the perfect match for you in terms of your interest. I personally HC that Zayne knows how to horse ride and knows ballroom dancing (idk he just seems like the type) 

❥︎ If he doesn’t know it, he definitely would ask you to teach him! He wants to know you inside and out, including the things you enjoy. 

❥︎ I feel like this would be a very healthy relationship! Especially Zayne is the type to immediately communicate when he feels something wrong. He won’t let you feel like you are alone or that he is against you. (Which again, ties perfectly  peaceful life you wanted) 

❥︎ In short, your lifestyle, personality, and wants in lives just screams Zayne! 

Random Hcs: 

✧He hold your hand all the time. He just wants to feel that you are with him all the time

✧Playing chess is how the two of you solve petty arguments. If he can sense the two of you ar about to be in an argument (over smth senseless like where toe at), he’ll pull up his phone or a physical ches sboard so the two of you can play. The winner is the one who decided what to do. 

✧ Every weekend, the two of you will go on a nature themed date, may it be horse back riding or 

✧ The first time he fell in love with you is when the two of you were playing chess and he lost. Then he saw how bright your smile was? God he was a goner after that. 

✧ He has a beautiful black horse! It's a gorgeous stallion that he bought just so he can ride with you.

Notes from the Author: Omg that took a long while to write XD I hope you enjoy! And it's definitely longer than my previous ones. I might stick to this layout to make more depth to my matchups

[letmedixonyou]

i'm not yours - part 14

summary: the page from your journal after what Daryl did mere hours ago.

words: 323 - short, concise ending

A/N: And with this part, we are finishing the "i'm not yours" and I am so, so grateful for all the people that liked, commented and reblogged my work! Sending hugs and kisses to all of you, especially the ones who've been here since the beginning! Love you, muffins!

I want to announce that there will be sequel to "i'm not yours"! Soon, muffins, soon... keep an eye out 🖤😉

Read previous part here!

From Y/N journal

How the hell did I end up here?

All those months of denying my feelings. Trying so hard to make myself not feel even the tiniest bit of love towards him, and now he gets a tiny bit tipsy and decides to kiss me like it's nothing?! Like what we've been through as friends didn't matter anymore, and this whole friendship is a joke to him? Am I a joke to him?

What the fuck, Daryl?! Why?

I can't deny, I thought about kissing him tonight too. His blue eyes watching me so intently and his lips so fucking kissable, but I'd never actually act on it. I've been doing so well at pretending I don't have any feelings for him. What now? What am I supposed to do now? Just go about my life and forget about it? Should I talk to him? He wouldn't open the doors… Not when he's in the state he is.

He walked off from me, so quickly, I wasn't able to squeeze a word out of my mouth. His face told me he wasn't sure why he did it, either. I wanted to tell him that it was okay, even if it wasn't. I wanted to tell him that it doesn't matter; it's just a kiss, it doesn't mean anything. It doesn't have to mean anything. We were both under the influence. Things like that happen, right?

Is it possible he

No, no, no, do not even think like that. This begs for another heartbreak. I cannot take another heartbreak.

This is so confusing…

You told me I'd never be yours. You told me it won't happen. And I accepted it. I held my head high and made sure that I was okay with being your friend again, Daryl. Clearly, something changed. What changed?!

I'm never going to be yours. I'm not yours… I'm not yours… I'm not yours…

Am I yours?

[canonkiller]

✨ "Your online print store is broken?" FAQ

Yeah I did that: A Summary

Q: Why did you remove everything from your Redbubble / INPRNT / etc?

A: A bunch of reasons. I made the choice for myself after thinking about it for a long time and not liking it. Some of these reasons include:

I don't like not knowing the workplace conditions or compensation given to the people actually manufacturing physical goods of my work through these services

I don't like the waste of easy-to-buy, easy-to-break manufacturing or the shipping process

I personally stopped giving a shit about the potential for theft-by-loss-of-potential-profit because it made me feel like a corporation and that sucked

There is no way in hell Redbubble will ever be profitable enough to get me to overlook this, and I don't think I should try to make it so.

The ones that haven't been emptied are having login issues. I'll be killing them as soon as I am able.

Q: So what's the alternative? How can I get prints now?

A: Anyone interested in prints can just ask me for the full resolution files of whatever piece you want and I'll send them over. Then you can either use your own printer or order something from a local store / chain and tada, print made.

In the future, I'll have the files up on Ko-fi (like the Avex body pillow) as pay what you want, so you don't even have to ask. I'd still prefer if you didn't make extras to sell for your own profit, but I can't stop you.

Q: But isn't that going to lose you money?

Probably, but the $20-odd I was making across all of my merch sites was not enough to overpower my concerns listed above. Someone tossing me $5 through PWYW is already paying me more than any of those sites would pet sale (Redbubble can be adjusted higher, but the price is already so inflated), and the end result is still more affordable for the buyer.

I also want my art to be more accessible to people like me: ones who can't casually spend $30 getting a piece of paper shipped internationally, but enjoy being able to experience shapes and colors. Differences between currency conversions, payment platform options and mail access are things I don't think should create a barrier in enjoying and adding art to your space.

Q: What about the other types of merch? Like clothing?

I've been keeping an eye on secondhand gadgets and would like to one day offer on-demand items with thrifted or secondhand base materials, but this is not a priority for me at this time. You'll live without a shirt, and if you won't, try an iron on transfer or whatever the modernized equivalent is. Anything I can't find a way to make, nobody needs to buy, simple as that.

The pin-back button press calls to me like a beautiful siren but I have yet to find one that is both affordable and close to me. The grind never stops.

Q: I also have concerns about the things you mentioned and want to try and be more accessible and sustainable with my art. Is it okay if I also do this?

I don't own the concept of sending people PNGs CMYK JPGs when they ask for them and even if I did I'm sure as hell not gonna charge people for doing it. The more people turning away from mass manufacturing the better, imo.

[dr-spencer-reids-queen]

What Happens At Home: Final Part

Pairing: Spencer Reid x Female!Reader

Word Count: ~2.3k

Warnings: canon violence, canon language, canon talk of death, methods of kill

Summary: A new team member joins due to her traumatic past, hoping that she can give some insight before more people are killed. Meanwhile, you get the house ready for Spencer's mother on Christmas weekend.

Season Six Masterlist

Author’s Note: I do not own anything from Criminal Minds. All credit goes to their respective owners. If there are any warnings that exceed the normal death/kills from the show, I will list them.

x

"Agent Hotchner. You should see this." Felix moves a small TV to face Hotch. It's an interrogation tape of one of the sixty-four suspects. "This guy is Frank Morris."

"I do? How do I know that?" Felix asks.

"I run the damn neighborhood watch," Frank glares.

"That means you're walking around at night."

"You said the profile could include somebody in the neighborhood watch, right?"

"That's where Agent Y/N comes in."

"I know the unsub's energy. I can match it to whoever is in the crowd."

"What are you talking about?"

"I'm a psychic. I see energies. Everyone has a different base energy, and the unsub left a lot of it behind at the crime scene."

"That's not possible."

"She's the real deal, and we trust her wholeheartedly. Let us focus on scanning the crowd, you focus on bringing Frank in." Hotch doesn't give him time to question you. "We're going to try something else. Can you make some officers available to run a sign-in table at a community meeting tonight? One of the things we're going to be examining is body language in a group environment."

"Body language?"

"It's something that the unsub won't be able to control even if he were to try to."

"Right. Okay, I'll have some uniforms detailed for the meeting."

"Will you also tell Brinkman that the unsub will display something that he can't control?"

"Sure," Felix nods and leaves.

"Do you think they'll be able to keep that to themselves?"

"Let's hope not."

"Hotch, Might be able to point out the unsub but you told me that I have to have facts and evidence to back up my claim. Is this going to happen tonight or will you arrest whoever I say to?"

Hotch sighs and takes you off to the side.

"We can only hold someone for forty-eight hours without cause. If we get him now, we have a clock running. If you point him out, we can be better prepared and gather evidence before bringing him in."

"Yeah, you're right."

"Don't think I don't trust you. I do. I take everything you say into consideration."

"Thanks, Hotch," you smile.

At the most recent crime scene, Derek and Emily found a laptop owned by the latest victim. Once Derek brought it back to the model home, he hooked it up for Penelope to sift through. Aubrey was a writer so you're hoping she kept some kind of journal. Maybe she noticed someone following her or she felt weird about something. It's a stretch but you have no doubt if there is anything to find, Penelope is going to find it.

With the suspects who are left, Penelope looks to see if any of them have a tech background that would allow them to modify a remote control of a garage. It might be how the unsub is letting himself into the houses.

Marjorie's family was out of town. Jill was strangled in her laundry room while her family was camping outside. The unsub was able to get through the entire house only to find a room where someone was awake. That doesn't sound like someone just randomly checking garage doors to see if one will open. This unsub stalked his victims and reprogrammed a garage door opener to work on his victim's doors.

As soon as six rolls around, you're in the back which has a great view of the entire church. People are filtering in, but none of them are the unsub yet. Derek and Emily show up after looking at each of the crime scenes.

"We just came from the last victim's house. The unsub used the garage as access. Maybe a remote door opener made to be universal. The police are saying it's random, but how could you randomly find a woman so vulnerable? Garcia's going over backgrounds again, trying to highlight anyone with tech experience," Derek explains.

"She's also doing a full workup on Brinkman and Ruiz. They had that kind of access. Has anyone seen Ruiz?"

"I saw him a while ago," Rossi answers Hotch.

"He set up everyone filling out forms, but I haven't seen him since," Spencer says.

"We need to ask for help in a different way. Tell people that we're looking for someone who might have seensomething rather than someone who did something. No one thinks that their friends or neighbors are capable of this. We should get started."

Hotch walks to the altar to address everyone inside the church while you stay in the back. The unsub has not entered the building. You didn't even have to go inside the crime scenes to see his energy. It was pouring out of it like a disease. Hotch gives a brief overview of what's going on in a calm manner so that no one panics.

"We're hoping that someone may have seen something and not even realized it. Maybe you have a neighbor who takes his trash out late, works on his car in his garage, or anything that might put someone outside at an odd hour and allow them to see something."

"Is there anything we can help you look for?" Emily asks Ashley.

"It won't be overt. The kids probably won't be afraid of their dad."

"They won't? These guys have explosive tempers, don't they?"

Your dad did.

"Definitely. Anger wasn't normal at my house. Usually, when it happened, when he exploded, it was an anomaly. A surprise. If anything, my father was overly solicitous. Too nice. If I wanted anything like bicycles, toys, and dolls, all I had to do was ask. In groups, he always held my hand. Always. Sometimes so tight, it almost cut off the circulation. I can never remember him putting me on his lap or holding me in any way."

You look away from her as you think about your own dynamic with your dad. You had the complete opposite experience with him. He was scary when he was angry. When he punished, he punished. Afterward, he'd feel so bad about how he reacted that he'd give you anything you asked for. He was overly affectionate for you and loved to hold you as a kid. It stopped when you got too old for it, but he always loved hugging you. You never saw an issue with it. You still don't, but you're confused why dread and doubt are creeping up your back when you think back on it.

"Are you okay?" Derek asks and nudges you.

"My dad did that stuff for me."

"Your dad isn't a killer."

"Yeah, I know," you whisper.

"He'd always have these talks with me. He was terrified someone would take me," Ashley continues. "He knew what was out there. Men like him. Maybe this unsub recently bought gifts for his kids. My dad used to buy me things all the time."

"What kind of gifts?"

"Anything. Everything. I told you, there was nothing... My whole life, there's only one thing I wanted that I couldn't have."

"What was it?"

"A pet."

After Hotch is done talking to the crowd, he walks over to your group, and you shake your head at his questioning look.

"He wasn't here, Hotch. I didn't see his energy anywhere. I don't think he's here but he could have blended in. There's a lot of people here. Energies tend to mush together in large crowds.

"We're gonna start with the people who didn't show and cross-reference with families with no pets," Emily explains.

"No pets?"

"I remembered I wasn't allowed to have a dog or a pet of any kind. It was more than a rule. It was a big problem for us," Ash says.

"That could be something."

"I'm sorry I couldn't point him out."

"We don't expect you to point him out. We're hoping you can help us once we have things narrowed down. Plus, I believe Y/N. If she says he wasn't here, he's probably not here."

Spencer returns with a list in his hands. "Out of the sixty-four suspects, eighteen of them didn't show up."

"Okay. Prentiss, take Ashley back to the model home, go through the eighteen names, and add the pet information." Emily nods, and the two women leave. "Is Garcia's working on technical backgrounds?"

"Yes," Derek nods.

"Okay, get her the eighteen names. Did Ruiz ever get here?"

"No. Neither did the security chief."

"As far as I'm concerned, we have twenty no-shows."

An officer walks into the church and over to your group.

"Agent Hotchner? Detective Ruiz would like you to meet him at Main and Oak. There's been another murder."

You immediately head over to the house to see Felix talking with the distraught husband of the victim. He is sitting on the front porch steps with his head in his hands, crying his eyes out.

"I know, Mike. I'm sorry. We're doing everything we can," Felix sighs.

"The unsub's killed two nights in a row. It's a major escalation."

"We need to start over," Hotch says. "I think we go back to the beginning. Local PD gave us a list of sixty-four out of the seventy-one possible males. I think we throw that out and start with the original seventy-one."

"What about Ruiz?" Spencer asks.

"He's definitely on the list."

"He didn't do it but that doesn't mean he doesn't know who did it or isn't covering for him," you whisper.

You head back to the model home but Emily and Ashley aren't there.

"Hey, Reid, where's the list of people that didn't make the meeting?" Derek asks.

He hands the list to him. "Right here."

"We need to look at all seventy-one files. We need to eliminate suspects our way, not theirs."

The files of everyone are on the dining room table, and you grab a handful of them to look through. Spencer drums his fingers down the sides of the folders and frowns in thought.

Derek takes out his phone and dials Penelope, putting her on speakerphone.

"Garcia, are you ready?"

"Yes. What do you got?"

The front door opens and Detective Ruiz walks in. Everyone looks at him like he's the suspect, and he senses the hostility.

"What's up?"

"There are only sixty-seven files here. Where are the other four?"

"One of them is mine, and the other three are the victims' husbands."

"Why would they automatically be cleared?" Derek asks.

"Wouldn't they? I mean, if you're gonna check them, you might as well check me."

"We are," Rossi states. "Detective, where are the missing files?"

"Right over here."

Felix grabs the files and hands them over to Hotch.

"Garcia, we need you to run a few more names. Phillip Long."

"Long has no suspicions on his record, no arrests, and no technology either."

"Drew Jacobs."

"Drew had a couple of arrests for assault when he was younger. I'll give you more details on that in a second. Is this the husband of the woman whose computer I went through?"

"Yeah."

"She was really unhappy with him. She said he was distant and he left her alone at night."

"He was wandering outside," Felix says. "As a matter of fact, before his wife was killed, he was my top suspect."

"He's an IT expert who travels around the world," Penelope says.

"He's a tech. Thanks, baby girl."

Emily and the Chief of Security walk through the door just now. "What's going on?"

"There was another murder during the meeting."

"Where's Seaver?"

"I thought she was with you," you say.

"No. I left her here."

Hotch takes out his phone and calls Ashley who picks up immediately. He places her on speakerphone so everyone can hear her.

"Agent Seaver," she answers.

"Ashley, where are you?"

"Without a doubt, sir."

"Where are you?"

"Yes, sir."

A look of realization falls over Hotch's face.

"Can you get out of there?"

"I'm sorry, sir. I can't do that. Mr. Jacobs told me that his daughter was frightened, and as soon as I can make her feel better, I'll come back."

She hangs up and you look at Hotch who is worried for her.

"Jacobs has her. She has no gun. Let's go."

"Son of a bitch," Felix curses.

You rush over to Drew's house. Based on the energy you can see floating out of the house, there is a child inside. It's like Ashley's childhood all over again.

"Prentiss and Morgan, take the back. Make noise. Let him know he's caught. It may be the only chance she's got."

You go with Htoch through the front door, and you keep your gun aimed in front of you.

"FBI!"

You make your way upstairs to see a little girl with tears streaming down her face and Drew standing behind Ashley with a knife to her throat.

"Drop the knife," Hotch demands.

"Daddy!"

You walk over to the little girl and pull her into you to keep her from running to her dad.

"Drop the knife!" Rossi yells.

You turn Drew's daughter toward you so she doesn't have to see what happens next. Drew pushes Ashley to the side and lunges at Hotch with the knife. You cover the girl's eyes just as her dad is shot twice in the chest. You don't waste any time in getting the girl downstairs so that she can't see her dad's dead body lying on the ground.

Case closed.

Spencer stayed true to his word and flew to Las Vegas to pick up his mom while you went back home and got the guest room ready for her. She's been having more good days so her doctor allowed her to take Christmas weekend away from the facility. Spencer texted when they landed in Virginia and once again when they were pulling up. You open the front door and smile when you see Diana.

"Diana! I'm so happy to see you! Merry Christmas!"

"Merry Christmas, dear," she smiles back.

"Why don't you two sit down and I'll make some tea for you two," Spencer offers.

You lead Diana to the living room and sit with her on the couch. You wanted to wait until Christmas morning to tell her the news but you can't contain your excitement much longer.

"We have some news, Diana."

"What is it?"

You hold out your left hand to show off the beautiful diamond ring. "Spencer and I are getting married. We're engaged." She gasps happily and grabs your hand to inspect the ring further. "We'd like you to be there."

"I wouldn't miss it for the world," she grins.

"Would you like to watch some Christmas movies?" She nods and leans back in her seat. "Great. I'll be right back."

You walk into the kitchen where Spencer is and slink up to his side.

"I like how happy you make my mom."

"She makes me happy, too. Afterall, she gave birth to you."

Spencer leans down and kisses you, utterly and completely in love with you.

"Children begin by loving their parents. As they grow older they judge them, sometimes they forgive them." – Oscar Wilde

x

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[thebiscuitlabryinth]

I think what drives me crazy is that the Sage of truth is so eager in everything he does, where Shadow Milk's theatrics are more so a shallow mask of who he once was to hide his new fury and disdain for the world, SoT is genuinely excited and having fun. Which makes for a more bitter reality when you imagine he was like this in the past, and cookies not wanting to accept the truth he offered nor offering any new options(the debate thing), not wanting to think for themselves, just wanting him to feed them what they wanted to hear. There is also his pride, and how much he wanted to be heard and seen. Mix it all up and he was a disaster waiting to happen.

That being said, the fact that in the AU SoT is more of a traveling scholar and not THE fount of knowledge does give the idea that he realized the truth much sooner and decided it was better to release himself from the title and start teaching from 0 to change his fate. He keeps his past a secret for a reason.

But the one thing that won't change is his desire and ability to influence people. He wants to spread his word (be it deceit or truth) as far as he can. Which will always make him clash with PV, who wont actively force his ideals, but will defend them like an unbreakable law. As such SM will always seek him out, wanting something from him. Only in cannon, he wants to be understood, while as SoT he wants to understand.

AND PV. Not having his support system meant he saw the truth, and just couldn't take it. Really goes to show how important it was for the kids to be with him bc without them, SM or not, he wouldn't have been able to handle it all. Which is such an interesting and heartbreaking thought. Goes to show SM really was voicing the demons PV had been already battling with long before.

Sorry for the word vomit I'm just going insane over this AU and wanted to hear your thoughts that's all 🙏

YEP YEP YEP i agree with all of this!!

i suspect the biggest difference between sage and the fount of knowledge is ultimately the conclusion they drew when they were confronted with an uncomfortable truth. sage accepted it because he came to the conclusion that truth can be subjective and comes in many forms, but that does not make it any less truthful. the fount, too, realised that truth is subjective but rejected it, concluding that must mean everything is a lie. that's why shadow milk is so focused on this idea of a world where lies and truth becomes indistinguishable - because to him, that's basically what the world is meant to be. if. that makes sense

that said, i don't think sage was ever the fount of knowledge in the au, and that's exactly why they were able to reach different conclusions. sage may not be happy about it, but he can accept when there is no answer to be found. he is a truthseeker, not a knowledge seeker, and sometimes the truth is there is no answer.

the fount's whole identity, on the other hand, is built on being the virtue of knowledge and dispensing wisdom to everyone. i wouldn't be surprised if having that kind of image, paired with the pride that seems consistent with all iterations of shadow milk, made the fount unable to accept that there can be mutiple conflicting truths, because if that is true, then how can his knowledge be fully correct? is it knowledge at all? and yet, people will accept his word no matter what, and that feeds into the idea that nothing matters, everything is a lie. people will believe anything, after all! idk, this is obviously all guesswork - i just find it interesting that shadow milk seems to have a tendency to refer to truth as a singular entity, whereas sage makes a point of referring to truth as a collective co-existing

AS FOR PV one of the things i noticed immediately after ep8 is that, yeah, the whole fiasco at the spire could have so easily ended badly for him. i kind of off-handedly mention it in my black sapphire aftermath fic, but if candy apple hadn't released the gingergang when she had, there isn't really a guarantee that they would have had another chance to talk one-on-one to pv and give him that spark of hope before he genuinely gave up entirely. ironically, if pv had succeeded in kicking the gingergang out at the end of ep7, he would have probably fully condemned himself to that despair too. it's an extension of his extreme selflessness, i think - without a support system there to give him something to fight for, pv is very prone to spiralling into his own self-loathing

oooh don't apologise for the word vomit because this is uh. pretty word vomity too. i hope this all makes some kind of sense 💕

[niche-pastiche]

The "father won't tell me anything" part implies to me that what Draco DOES know, is only because he's been pestering Lucius for answers. And Lucius has been extremely tight lipped about it. With that context, I think it's interesting that the information Draco does know for sure is "but I know one thing -- last time the chamber was opened a Mudblood died." Because the specificity of "i know one thing" leads me to believe that really is the only thing Draco was able to pin down happened for sure. A muggleborn student died. And the italics makes it seem like Draco is treating that as an extremely juicy bit of gossip in a way makes it seem like he must have had to work for even that much info.

And the other part, is Draco speaking in response to someone else's question. So he kind of has to make himself sound as confident as possible in what he knows for reasons of social clout. So I think the most Draco knows for sure is that the problem was dealt with and the school was made safe again.

And if I read between the lines there, I think Draco got what little info out of his dad that he did in the context of Lucius wanting him to know that "you are not in any danger, you were never in any danger." Whether he did or didn't know what was going on with the diary, he knows at least enough to feel confident reassuring his son.

And I think the fact he won't share more than the bare minimum of information required to reassure Draco might also be an attempt to protect his son.

So in my read of things, it mostly tells us that regardless of what he's up to or what he knew about the diary, Lucius is doing his best to keep Draco from being involved.

Emergency meeting everyone

So, I was re-reading the polyjuice scene in CoS and, like, the information that Draco relays from Lucius is weird?

and

Going purely off this, it looks like Lucius doesn't know the real story; he told Draco, who he has no reason to lie to (Lucius could have just omitted the information if he didn't want him to know), that the perpetrator was expelled but, like, Hagrid is who was expelled and he is very much not the one who opened the chamber.

If Lucius knew that Hagrid was the student expelled for doing some light ethnic cleansing back in the day he wouldn't be treating him like garbage as he is wont to do so it appears he doesn't even know that much,.

In light of this revelation, the options we are left with are:

Lucius doesn't know shit and was just telling Draco unverified gossip (which means he also doesn't know Voldemort was the perpetrator and Hagrid the one framed for the events)

Lucius was fed half truths by Voldemort during the first war (but, like, to what end? So that Lucius wouldn't go looking for Voldemort's true identity? Did Voldemort implicate Hagrid again?)

Lucius got some information from older Death Eaters/his father but he doesn't know Hagrid is the one who was expelled (which also means he may not know it was Voldemort's doing)

Lucius knows the "official" truth of the chamber's first opening and doesn't understand why Hagrid is now a Dumbledore fanboy after a teenagerhood full of vigilantism

Lucius knows the whole unvarnished truth (from Voldemort? from his father?) and only told Draco the "official" truth for some weird reason

In almost all of these scenarios Lucius has no clue that he's the reason why the chamber was re-opened on account of his masterful diary switcharoo at Flourish and Blott's (and really, even if he knows it was Voldemort he still probably wouldn't be aware of what the diary really is in relation to the chamber), which means the whole thing makes even less sense than Dumbledore's theory at the end of the book.

I am confused.

help

[araraito]

Everyone in my life has been putting great pressure on me to make more money and I’m very close to breaking down

[rapidhighway]

sigh I did almost nothing for almost an hour am I allowed to give up and just not show up tomorrow I really wanna.....

[krokaxe]

Stage one of dental/jaw treatment cost £410 today 🧍🧍 If any of you would like to help me out you can paypal me and I'd really appreciate it.

If you're unfamiliar, I'm disabled and medically signed off work with ongoing chronic/incurable conditions like fibro/EDS/ME etc. I don't like asking for help but I'm looking down the barrel of a very long, frankly horrifying gun in terms of this specific problem. @krokaxe for srb purposes.

[moe-broey]

Somewhere in here I gotta fit a speech bubble BUT. Sillies...

[einaudis]

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