#if there was a bone of heterosexuality in him in the first place
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theinfinitedivides · 1 year ago
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'i did what i had to do. so shoot me.' 'nahi. i won't kill you. i like you.' 'either you let me go, or you fight me, if you won't kill me.'
Arun, upon hearing that:
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johnbrand · 5 months ago
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Mists
It had been a lot easier for Miles to get into the groove of the gym than he had anticipated. When he had first entered, the recently-graduated meek college graduate had originally planned only utilizing the treadmills. Miles wanted to stay fit while he applied for new jobs, and nothing more than that.
“Hey shrimp, over here!”
Miles immediately went red, pivoting towards the bellowing voice. A shirtless jock was waving him over to a small booth near the front. Trying his best to stay calm, Miles approached, the hulking figure of the other party looming over his skinny frame as he drew closer.
“I assume you’re new here?” the jock grunted.
“How could you tell?” Miles replied.
“It’s Shirtless Saturday bro!” the jock chuckled. “Mandatory requirement of the gym, should’ve been in your membership details. Helps encourage self-positivity or whatever.”
Miles took a quick scan around the gym to confirm, taking in all the shirtless, muscular, sweaty bodies. To his further embarrassment, he found a certain part of his midsection perking up a bit in response. Miles could not believe there were so many hot guys in one space.
“Uh…ok…” Miles mumbled, slowly removing his top article. The jock snatched it from him once he was finished, placing it in a waste bin behind the booth.
Before Miles could complain, the jock stopped him. “Trust me, most dudes go shirtless every day here. Our gym mists the place every five to ten minutes, like produce at a grocery store. Keeps everyone cool and fresh.”
As if on cue, a spray of mist rained down from the ceilings, trickling onto each one of the shirtless men at the gym. A coating fell onto Miles, absorbing into his hairless, near-translucent skin. Figuring it was time to move on, Miles nodded and left the station. Although instead of finding himself at the treadmill, his feet led him towards a workout bench. He did not even realize his mistake until the soft buzz of another coat of mist fell onto his body.
Rubbing his head with a meatier palm, Miles took in his surroundings, trying to make sense of the situation. Once again he found himself boning up as he took in all the attractive men working out. Believing he had regained a sense of direction, Miles got up from the bench, placing his weights aside before once again moving across the floor. However, his body sat him down at a machine, a leg pump to be specific. Miles did not notice this until another wave of mist rained down. He also did not notice the muscular definition that expanded from his calves, quads, and buttocks.
The pattern continued slowly, all without Miles’ intention or attention. The jock from the booth followed along, bemused as with each spray Miles shifted from one machine to the next, his frame piling on pound after pound of muscle. After a while, the constant misting began to affect more than just Miles’ figure. One coating helped calm the poor boy’s nerves, granting him the confidence to swagger rather than scurry across the gym floor. Another vocalized this transition, literally, with Miles grunting and groaning with each exertion like every other lunk.
The jock could almost predict each wave that followed. The masculinized features, the carpet of hair, the constant rearranging of a larger, yet dormant package. The jock had noticed Miles’ excited pecker right away, knowing his fagginess would eventually be washed away. Yet that conversion was the only wave he could not predict: did it come after the spray of manly conformity or the vapor of fraternal commitment?
In the end, it did not matter. Once a person walked into the building, they became a permanent member of the gym. The jock had been serious when he stated the gym’s mists kept everyone “cool and fresh”. Miles just did not realize that the gym’s definition of “cool” meant a stereotypically masculine, arrogant, heterosexual perspective; and “fresh” reflected a more casual discretion.
A final layer of mist hailed down from above, programming Miles to carry on to the chest press. Unlike the previous coats however, this one stayed on the surface, as no more could be absorbed. It now remained as sweat on the undeniably straight man’s skin, reproducing before dropping back into the floor. From there, it was absorbed and then processed back up into the sprinklers above. A water cycle of pure, heterosexual testosterone. 
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But Miles did not know this, nor would he ever. His past self was forgotten history, now nothing more than just another straight bro.
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hbyrde36 · 7 months ago
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STWG Daily Prompt 5/7/24: Mermay
Rating: Gen | WC: 1929 | AO3
Eddie had always lived his life in fear of being caught, of being labeled a freak for more than just his love of Metal, Tolkien, and D&D—not to mention his less than heterosexual leanings in the romance department, but that was a whole other thing with its own set of worries.    
Now here he was quite literally being hunted, though not for any of the reasons he’d expected. The whole town thought he was a monster, and he was—
Just not the type of monster they were accusing him of being.
They thought he was a murderer. 
In reality he was just a scared boy who’d spent his whole life trying desperately to keep the family secret, and got caught in the wrong place at the wrong time.
For the first time since he was little, Eddie found himself grateful for his deformity, on the night Jason and his buddies had finally found his hiding place, the boathouse, and he’d been forced to flee via lake Rick’s boat. He’d paddled quietly by hand, hoping to avoid notice, but of course they’d spotted him anyway. Then the motor had proved all but useless when he’d tried to start it, and suddenly the other boys were in the water coming after him, gaining on him, until Patrick— 
He didn’t like to think about that part, the second time he’d had to watch someone die such a horrible death at the hands of Vecna, even if the guy had been part of the mob calling for his head. 
Knowing what was coming, Eddie had quickly shucked his pants and shoes, tucking them under his arm just as the boat tipped, sending him crashing into the dark water. And there it was, that familiar tingle at the base of his spine, the sensation of pins and needles running up and down his legs as bones and muscle reformed, knitting themselves together in a new way to form a long powerful tail—skin giving way to glistening black scales that covered him from hips to fluke. 
In seconds he was clear across the lake, much faster like this in the water than he could ever be on land—so fast that Jason was still screaming out Patrick’s name as Eddie pulled himself up onto the shore, praying he would dry out quickly and get his land legs back, and somehow be able to get in touch with Dustin and the others. 
That should have been it, the closest he’d ever come to discovery, but no, it seemed Lover’s Lake wasn’t done trying to ruin Eddie’s life yet, because he was right back on it the next night, in that same fucking useless excuse for a boat. 
His legs had eventually returned, and he managed to steal a walkie and reconnect with the others, but just as he was starting to think things were looking up, they spiraled out of control again, and they wound up hunting the day into the night chasing an electromagnetic field that would lead them to a gate to the underworld. 
A path that eventually led them—you guessed it! 
Back to Lover’s Lake. 
Steve bravely volunteered to be the one to take the dive, as the self proclaimed best swimmer of the group. Eddie had done his best not to snort at that, any semblance of laughter dying suddenly on his tongue anyway as he’d watched, or rather, gawked openly, as Steve stripped off his shirt, tossing it pointedly right at him. 
Eddie gulped. 
It’d all been fine at first. Steve came back up, announcing that he’d found the gate they were looking for, only to be pulled right back down again by an unseen force—and did not resurface. 
Nancy jumped in first, Robin shortly after, and Eddie…
“Goddamnit! Son of a bitch! Oh this is so stupid, this is so stupid, this is so stupid—shit–shit–shit!”
Eddie jumped in after them. 
The water soaked through his jeans in seconds—jeans that he’d neglected to take off this time—and his body quickly got the memo that it was being submerged, the denim fabric shredding to pieces in the transformation. 
Great, that was going to be awkward later. 
With a whip of his tail, Eddie dove deeper. Nancy must have made it through the pulsing red hole in the ground already, but he could see Robin still struggling to swim her way towards it. He snatched her by the hand on his way by, pulling her down, and shoved her through the gate ahead of him, hoisting himself through, well, up and out right behind her. 
Nancy and Robin had taken up oars from somewhere, and were about ten feet away fighting off an air attack of freaky looking bat creatures, while Steve was laid out on the ground, struggling—choking, while one of the things had its tails wrapped around his neck. 
Eddie dragged himself, hand over hand, along the dry ground, the girls too busy to spare him more than a wide eyed glance, until he reached Steve’s side, and together they were able to pry the little fucker’s tail loose from his throat, while Eddie beat another one off Steve’s side with the end of his tail. 
When the last of the bats had been dispatched, and the group had collectively caught their breath, Eddie found three puzzled faces aimed right at him.
“Well, don’t stand there gaping at me, help him!” Eddie hollered, gesturing to Steve and his multiple bleeding wounds. 
Steve startled, looking down at himself as though only just realizing for the first time that he was actually injured, hissing in pain as his fingers ghosted over his chewed up sides.
Nancy leapt right into action, tearing a strip of fabric off the bottom of her shirt to use for wrapping his torso, as Robin watched attentively over the whole thing, holding Steve’s hand. 
But Steve couldn't seem to stop looking at Eddie, with this… unreadable expression. 
Eddie fought not to squirm. 
He knew what was coming. The second Steve was taken care of they would all turn on him with suspicion, with questions. 
But they never got the chance. 
No sooner was Steve patched up and ready to go, than a series of chittering calls sounded, a few close by, more off in the distance. Four or five of the demon bats surrounded the gate, cutting off their way back, and a swarm, dozens more of the creatures filled the sky, heading straight for them.
Robin wrung her hands as she stared out at the horizon. “We have to get out of here.”
She was right. They were too exposed out here in the open, sitting ducks.
Nancy looked around wildly, searching for a solution. “The woods!” She shouted, pointing towards a thicket of trees that just might provide enough cover to hide them.
“But, Eddie–” Steve began.
“Just go,” Eddie shook his head, dropping his gaze to the ground. “I–I won’t be running anywhere for a while, and you–” he cut himself off, gasping as he felt strong arms slide under his tail and around his back, lifting him.
“You’re one of us now, man.” Steve said, cradling him to his chest. “We’re not leaving you behind.”
Eddie threw his arms over Steve's shoulders automatically as the other boy began to walk at a brisk pace. “But you can’t! Steve, you're hurt!”
Steve looked Eddie right in the eyes, grit his teeth, and adjusted his hold. “Not too hurt to carry you. We’re gonna make it out of here. All of us. Okay?”
“Okay.”
When they were deep enough into the woods and fairly confident they were no longer being stalked by the army of evil overgrown flying rats, Nancy and Robin scouted up ahead a bit to figure out the way to the Wheeler house, while Steve and Eddie made their slow and steady way along behind them. 
“Thanks, by the way, for saving my ass back there.” Steve said after a while.
“Thanks for carrying me.”
“So,” Steve cleared his throat awkwardly. “How does it work?”
Eddie had never really prepared for this, never thought he’d have anyone to explain it to. “You, uh, you see the movie Gremlins?”
Steve tilted his head.
“Dude, don’t you work in a video store?” Eddie sighed. “You know, the furry little monsters with the rules? No light, no feeding them after midnight, and–”
“Don't get them wet.” Steve finished for him, nodding. 
“Bingo.”
“Is that why you always skipped gym class on swim days?”
“Be kinda hard to hide this thing, don’t you think?” Eddie flapped the end of his tail for emphasis, the force making Steve stumble. Eddie grimaced, heat rising in his cheeks. “Sorry.”
There was something so incredibly intimate about talking like this, with Steve holding him close, their faces only a handful of inches apart. It made his heart race.
Steve smiled, letting out a breathy laugh as he shook his head. “What do you do when it rains?”
“Rain is usually okay. My legs have to be completely soaked or submerged to start the change.”
“And right now your legs are..?”
“They’ll be back once I dry out.” Eddie bit his lip. “I’m sorry, I know it’s disgusting.”
Steve frowned. “Is that what you think?”
Eddie shrugged. “It’s what my dad always said. That’s why I live with my uncle Wayne now. Good ole Al kicked me out. I–uh, inherited the gene from my mom, apparently, and after she died and he saw what happened to me in the bath he freaked out. Said he didn’t sign up to raise a monster.”
“You’re not a monster, Eddie.”
“Look at me, Steve. If not a monster, then I’m definitely a freak,  just like everyone says I am.”
“I think you’re beautiful.”
Eddie scoffed. “What, you got a thing for dudes with tails, Harrington?”
It had to be some kind of joke. He was part fish for fuck’s sake. Slimy—gross! Even if, by some miracle, Steve Harrington of all people actually was some flavor of queer, he could never be into Eddie. Not really.  
“No… Just you.”
“What?”
“You are beautiful, Eddie. With and without the tail. I’ve always…” Steve halted his steps, holding him impossibly tighter as his gaze flitted between Eddie’s eyes and mouth. “I used to look at you, in school. I just didn’t understand why, but… I’ve done some growing up, and I think I get it now.
“Oh.” Eddie found his own gaze being drawn to Steve’s lips as well.
Steve leaned in, asking softly, “Can I?”. 
“Yes.” Eddie breathed. He couldn’t believe this was happening, it couldn’t be real. 
Steve closed the small distance between them, his soft lips so unsure at first, ghosting over Eddie’s for a moment before pressing in, insistent. Eddie melted into it, toes curling, and a sound, an embarrassing mix of a whine and a moan, formed in the back of his throat. 
They both pulled back from the kiss panting and flushed, and that was the moment Eddie realized—toes curling. 
He had toes again, and feet, and legs—
And no fucking pants on!
He was half naked, bare ass out in the air, being carried bridal style in Steve Harrington’s arms, in the middle of another dimension—all while being on the run for murder and trying to thwart an evil psychic wizard named after a D&D villain. 
Suddenly the kiss didn’t seem all that far-fetched. 
“Hey Robin?!” Steve called out. “Can we borrow your overshirt?”
Permanent taglist(open): @penny00dreadful @pearynice @hitlikehammers @bookworm0690 @wonderland-girl143-blog 
@goodolefashionedloverboi @themagicalari
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the1975attheirverybest · 9 months ago
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Boyfriend
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A/N: as requested by @yukizaldi. Sorry it’s kind of shit. I haven’t written in a bit and I feel like I’ve forgotten how words work. warnings: smut. **** It is a truth, universally acknowledged, that every committed boyfriend, must, sooner or later, have the period routine down. And Matty fancied himself an expert. As much of an expert as a heterosexual man who has never had a period can be, anyway. He took pride in his system. He kept track. He remembered the flowers and the chocolate. He refilled hot water bottles without being asked, kept the pain killers on hand, happily drove to the drugstore, or ice cream shop, to get tampons and sugary desserts. His strategy was always to get ahead of things before they could happen. Have everything she could possibly need within her reach, so she’d never feel the need to even ask. All that left is the cuddles and Lowe stomach rubs. That part wasn’t restricted to bad period days, though. Matty always eagerly  provided that. 
But, one thing he learned the hard way was that, even for a biological reoccurrence that took place every month for decades of a woman’s life, a  menstrual cycle can, not only be unpredictable, but make her unpredictable, too. 
“Take off your pants.” She panted, into his mouth, kissing him, and biting his lip. 
He mewled, softly, his hands fumbling with the buttons of his jeans. He didn’t get very far before  his hands were crushed by the weight of her hips rolled against his, pushing him against the wall. 
“B-baby….s-slow down.” 
“Shush, Matty. Please. No talking. Just fucking. Okay? I- I’ve been waiting for you all day.”
And how could he not be flattered that his girlfriend wants to jump his bones the very second that he walks through the door?
She got down on her knees, her hands pushing his out of the way and pulling down his waist hugging pants. 
She rubbed his clothed, half hardened cock, listening for his hissing and reveling in the slight bucking of his hips. She felt her mouth watering at the prospect of having him between her lips. 
“Gonna take you out now…”
Matty nodded, eager, cursing, hotly, under his breath. “Christ.”
Slowly, her hand wrapped around him, working him with deft flicks of her wrist, until he was stiff, ready to burst against his own stomach. 
She took him in her mouth, her tongue rubbing the underside of his tip while her hand tugged lightly on his balls. 
“FUCK!” Matty’s legs shook; his palm slammed against the wall in an attempt to steady himself, his hips reflexively. Thrusting into her mouth. “Sh-shit. Sorry…”
She didn’t seem to mind, though, her lips smiles around his cock. The sight so sinful it almost undid him right then and there. Encouraged by his moans, she moved faster, sucking him harder, to the rhythm of his flustered cries and the contracting and relaxing of the muscles in his stomach. 
“No, no, no- stop, stop.” Matty begged, frantic. “If- if you don’t stop, I’m- not gonna make it to the bedroom.” His face turned red. 
***
Matty winced, feeling her grind into his lap. Their lips crashed together, needily, as his hands felt around for the hem of her top. She let him remove her t shirt; his arm snaked around her back to unclasp her bra. The discomfort she felt when the underwire slid from underneath her breasts  sounded a warning in the back of her mind; but she promptly dismissed it, her desire for him outweighing any and all other feelings. 
Matty’s hand cupped her breast, his thumb swiping over her nipple. She jolted, her body tensing up, and not in good way. Waiting for the worst of the pain to pass, she leaned into him again, her lips finding his neck. 
Matty’s hands roamed her body, cradling her back at first, then resting at her neck, before sliding, slowly, down her sides, his fingers tracing her skin. He squeezed her hips, his body instinctively rolling into hers. She felt a wave of cramps hit her, interrupting the needy pleasure of being entangled with him and yanking her out of the moment. She moaned, in a way that sounded closer to pain than pleasure, giving Matty a brief moment of pause. His eyes reluctantly pulled open, watching her searchingly. When she showed no signs of slowly down, he dismissed his doubts, giving himself back to her, his hands reaching for her again, cupping her breasts, squeezing them slightly. his thumb pinch her right nipple. 
She winced loudly. “Ow no- ouch!”
“Sorry- fuck- was that not…”
“No, no. It’s fine.”  She looked down at her breasts. 
“Okay, I’m no mind reader but it was decidedly not fine. It did not sound like the ‘ouch’ of a fine person. Sounded like the ‘ouch’ of someone in pain.”
Her hands cupped his face, attempting to pull him in seductively. Another wave of cramps hit her, and despite her best attempt to stay calm, he could see it in the way that she squeezed her eyes. 
“Baby, no- hang on a minute- no.” As much as he loved being kissed by her, he wouldn’t budge. 
She groaned. Mumbling something under her breath and laying her head on him. 
unexpectedly, he felt a strange dampness against his chest. His brows furrowed, looking down, “babe?”
The sob she’d been holding escaped her lips. She burst into tears. 
“Oh my- fuck! What’s happened? Are you alright?” Matty panicked, his hand tilting her face up to meet her eyes. “What is it? What’s going on?”
“No-nothing.” She sniffled, rolling her eyes. Both at his concern, and her own dramatic tears. “I’m just- I ….want…” she wiped her cheeks with the back of her hand. “I’m so fuckin horny. I want to cum so bad.”
“So- you’re crying?”
“No, genius!” She hit his forehead against his chest as if against a walll. “I wanna fuck you so bad but also- I feel so - my tits are so sore. And….I feel so gross and bloated. I’m tired. My legs- feel like I’ve run a marathon. And then a 10K. And then walked up a mountain. But I’m just….so- “
“Horny?”
“So. Fuckin. Horny.” She whined. 
As if her words had flipped a switch within him, Matty’s entire demeanor shifted, wasting no time in providing her with comfort. His hands rubbed her lower stomach as she rambled on about the various, sometimes conflicting, symptoms of periods, expressing in graphic detail all the things that she wished she could do to him if it weren’t for the alarm levels of exhaustion that she’d been plagued with. Matty did his best to be a listener. But he was never good at hiding his amusement, letting his giggling get away from him occasionally. 
“I’m sorry, darling.” He whispered in her ear. “Wish you’d said something sooner.” 
“I don’t- I don’t want the cutesy stuff.” She stated defensively. 
“What?”
“I- know what you’re gonna do. You’re gonna try to make me feel better and feed me chocolate and watch a romcom and get me a hot water bottle….i don’t want that.”
Matty frown. “Hey! I thought you liked when I did that!”
“I did- I do….sometimes. Just- not right now.”
“Right.” He nodded. “Well, what- what do you need right now?”
“Need to cum.”
“I can-“
“But I don’t feel sexy.”
Matty scratched his head. “May I ask….what- how do you feel?”
“Sweaty and huge and like my feelings are half my body weight and also hungry.”
He giggled, taking her in his arms and kissing her. “Very well. I can work with that. I think.”
****
Matty emerged out of their master bathroom, smelling, nauseatingly of a strong mix of essential oils, like the local Lush store had exploded on him. 
“Warm bubble bath should be ready any minute, m’lady.”
She rolled her eyes, hiding her blushing face. “M’lady? Really?”
“Can I get you anything to drink? Something to take into the bath with you perhaps?”
She shook her head. 
“Very well then.” He glanced at his wristwatch. “That give us about…well, I’ll have to do my best work, but I’m up for a challenge.” He grinned at her suggestively. 
“What-“ before the realization dawned on her, he’d picked her up in his arms, tossing her playful back onto the bed. “We’re gonna need a towel for this. Spread your legs for me.” 
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dekusleftsock · 11 months ago
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MMMMM OKAY OKAY OKAY
I’m surprised no one has talked about how interesting Izuku breaking his mask is???????? Like oh my god?????
He even comments on the fact that it’s probably useless to wear in a scene like this, since he only put it on previously to shield his face from the waves while fighting and running away from Himiko.
In fact, I could even compare this to another Himiko scene altogether!
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Himiko’s broken mask.
It’s a metaphorical mask, but honestly, so is Izuku’s. In this chapter (and previous chapters, obviously) Izuku is hiding from the fact that he has… deeper than desirable feelings for Katsuki that makes him violent and hateful. He does not want to be violent or hateful, but currently, he is at such an awful state of mind (due to Katsuki’s death and then reawakening, and also partly the state of his friends and colleagues) that he can’t help doing so.
That hate and violence cannot be stuffed down deep in his bones like usual, oh no, his quirk elicits a PHYSICAL reaction. But he didn’t have a quirk before, how could he really know that this would happen? It’s like walking through daily life as a teenager, and then in your early adulthood being hit by an extreme anxiety disorder or other health conditions. With no real reason, it just happened one day! Other people have dealt with this before sure, but they had several years throughout their adolescence to figure it out, how to cope with it. And just like it’s said in the manga, it’s like everyone else is running far ahead, and you’re just starting to crawl.
And that’s what the mask is (fuck you dream 🫶🫶🤭) really for. It protects Izuku on a very emotional level. The mask is broken, chipping, dirty—yet he wears it anyway because it’s the only way he can really smile like allmight. Just like allmight found his mask, he also found his smile. It’s also probably why his first reaction to having a quirk stolen (while also strategical) is to hide hide hide in blackwhip. A bubble that hides him from Shigaraki, from Katsuki, from everyone who could see his face.
And comparing this to toga, hello?? Her masking metaphor is about MASKING AS A HETEROSEXUAL GIRL, and her breaking that mask makes her a deviant, an outcast! And here Izuku is, doing the exact same thing.
Shigaraki has danger sense now, by all means, the table has flipped—Shigaraki now knows that Izuku wants to hurt him. Izuku wants to destroy him. Danger sense doesn’t work on just anyone, it has to be coming from a place of malice (because Himiko doesn’t affect danger sense), and an urge for violence. Very Himiko trait.
AND IZUKU KNOWS THIS, HES BERATING HIMSELF, INDIRECTLY ONCE MORE—saying that he has this useless power (similar to how he berated the fish when he was mad at Katsuki in chapter 1), comments on how the mask is broken and that allmight found him that mask, and he even holds this disappointed look on his face.
THIS is the weight I was talking about. This. The berating, the indirect hatred, because Izuku hates. He hates people and things just like Shigaraki does. That’s why danger sense was the only power shigaraki should have taken, it’s the literal power to feel who is loving and who is hating.
AND OF COURSE WE HAVE THE THROWBACK CHAPTER TO 342 OH MY GOD
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The fact that Izuku has to say, “you’re a person”, ITS SO DAMN BEAUTIFUL YALL IM DEAD
Oh also! Izuku having matching blood falling over the other half of his face is just too fitting.
To me, with this whole chapter, Izuku and Katsuki, the parallels Katsuki had to ochako last chapter (the falling on the ground, passing out because “it’s getting cold”), it’s just given me a lot to think about.
And I’ve thought and paced and I really really hope I can describe what I’ve been thinking.
Pikahlua (or however their name is spelled, sorry!) translated the text on top of ochako as “Im still not sure what was obvious to that person”. These are the rough translations which is good to keep in mind, but there’s a few ideas I’ve had floating around from that line.
I went back and read 342, Ochako is ofc looking out into the city, calling herself an oddball, even saying she feels like she doesn’t know anything about Toga; if, and this is a big if, but… if this is Izuku thinking about Ochako, then that makes this line far more interesting.
What was obvious to her? A couple of possibilities—possibly understanding that she doesn’t really know Himiko, maybe it’s the fact that Ochako is so openly ready to accept Himiko (unlike Izuku for shigaraki, though this doesn’t apply to Katsuki. Showing Izuku is capable of feeling long term resentment for someone who wronged him, so long as that person doesn’t just wrong him, izuku), or maybe, it was the fact that she was so openly ready to say that she was weird, an oddball (a queer trope for coding characters, “she’s just so weird about that girl”, “I feel like I don’t really fit in”, or “I feel like the way I think of this same sex character—regardless of contextual status such as being a villain or an arch enemy—is wrong, and I should be condemned.”)
Though this could also be Ochako talking about Himiko that wasn’t directly said/shown in that scene, “I’m still not sure what was so obvious to Himiko about me.” (Though personally I find this harder to believe since this isn’t a panel directly taken from the chapter, rather a redraw from Izuku’s perspective. The drawing even makes her look taller than Izuku, which is interesting. Maybe he thinks that she’s better than him, morally)
And if we take Izuku’s comment of “You’re a person” then that furthers my belief that these are thoughts ABOUT ochako. Maybe the “obviousness” was the seeing the villain as a person. She EVEN TELLS HIM that she was thinking of Himiko during her speech about how Izuku is still human to the civilians. Maybe that speech was never about Ochako to Izuku, maybe it was ALWAYS ABOUT HIMIKO.
And ntm, this is another case of Izuku projecting onto someone else; not only is this a declaration to Shigaraki, “You’re still a person (that’s why I know I’m going to save you)!” But it’s also a declaration to himself, a motivator, a reminder that Ochako made to him during her speech, in Katsuki’s apology, and from allmight during his vigilante arc.
“You’re still a person (Izuku).”
The same declaration he made to the fish in the first chapter, to Shoto during the sports festival, and to Katsuki during dvk1.
“I matter.”
And it’s this that truly makes all of this so ironic—izuku speaking for himself, projecting onto shigaraki… honestly they feel the same way about hero society. The only reason Izuku can and does relate to Shigaraki is that he also feels cast away, no adults to reach out to as a kid, therefore making decisions on morality and bias that he mostly made on his own. Not only that, but Izuku has been the boy that was not seen as human. He has been the one to be isolated and shamed for being dirty and looking like a villain.
That’s honestly probably why he agreed with Ochako at all—he saw the little boy Shigaraki once was in ofa yes, but he’s also been an isolated and dehumanized teenager at UA. What if what Izuku was thanking Ochako for wasn’t actually standing up to the people and the speech she gave to him, but that she was able to truly open his eyes, see the bigger picture. Save Shigaraki.
Do I think shigaraki and dekus relationship and ideas of relatability are vastly different from togachako AND dabi + shoto ideas? Yes. Extremely so. Shoto and Ochako don’t and never really did hate Himiko or Touya. Obviously, to an extent Izuku does. Ntm, Shoto and Ochako brought up their conversations about their respective villains on their own, professing their insecurities and doubts, unlike Izuku who only expresses that he relates to them.
Maybe this anger and hatred came more recently, after seeing Katsuki’s death, but I have a feeling it more has to do with a built up grudge of Shigaraki targeting Katsuki.
Regardless of all of this, I see something bigger; when Izuku breaks his mask, he smiles. Genuinely smiles. Not his bright allmight smile, but he smiles regardless on that last page. It hurts and it takes a lot of power to push it, but it happens anyway.
This is the first time I’ve seen Izuku happy, or at the very least motivated, since seeing Katsuki dead. Even when Katsuki woke up, he still looks heart broken.
But the mask is gone. He’s free. Just like Himiko was free, so is Izuku.
And I thought for just a second that he would cover himself up another way, but he didn’t. He got up and he said “You’re still human” And smiled at him like the badass he is (yes I can compliment him, I promise. He’s my favorite character for a reason, I also just wanna kick him in the balls 24/7 for being so dumb).
And what did Himiko do when the mask broke?
She gave in.
She was free.
She let the world know, “this is who I am, take it or leave it.”
And I know, in my heart, that this is what Izuku will do too.
Yk how I mentioned earlier that this was a parallel to this?
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I mean that, down to the fact that Ochako is calling Himiko by her first name.
Will Izuku try to give his life to Katsuki? I doubt it, he can’t do much in the medical sense.
However, do I see a shared moment similar to this? Maybe.
Okay all I’m saying is that it’s undeniably canon atp. Like I’m gonna wait for some kind of confession or kiss (bc yes I still believe that will happen, I am in that camp and you couldn’t drag me out unless I was cold and dead on the ground), but Himiko literally says she loves Ochako multiple times, INCLUDING is 395, so like. Idk what else you want. It’s this. We did it. Horikoshi you bastard.
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thefanboyhub · 7 months ago
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More random HeadCannons for the SBG gang because yes:
Aiden has two different music tastes. The goofy kind (party rocks for example) and then the "oh shit, he's depressed" kind. Think Pierce The Veil, Melanie Martinez, Get Scared, any kind of "I'm fucked up" kind of music.
Ashlyn listens to a lot of classical and instrumental music or like indie alternative kind of stuff. Think James Marriott, Fish in a Birdcage, ECT.
Tyler listens to guitar heavy stuff (like I said last time I did this shit) but he really likes rock/metal kind of stuff. Think Get Scared, Limp Bizkit, Three days Grace, Pierce The Veil, that kind of stuff.
Taylor listens to more upbeat things. She also likes classic pop (Gwen Stacy, Shakira, ECT.) Think Britney Spears.
Ben listens to everything and anything. It depends on his mood how much energy he has the vibes he feels ECT.
Logan shockingly listens to rock. He'll say he's a Fish In a Birdcage girly (which he is but he likes Get Scared and Nickelback more) but he is lying. He wants that head bangers that drown out everything while he zooms into shit.
Tyler would be the worst with road rage when driving.
Logan would be the most normal about driving.
Taylor would be scared at first and relax afterwards while Ben is not relaxed and generally hates driving.
Aiden is shockingly the best driver???
Ashlyn is actually decent at driving when a giant monster isn't trying to kill her and her friends.
Tayler tried to become friends with Ashlyn when they were little but it uh... Failed.
Creator has confirmed Ashlyn is autistic and has kind of said Logan has OCD and Aiden has ADHD I believe. I would like to add to this by saying: Ashlyns autism is more on the social aspect, less on the texture and touch, and HEAVY on sound aspect. Logan's OCD gets worse the more stressed he is, his obsession is intrusive thoughts and the need to be perfect at anything academic, his compulsion is auto cannibalism(chewing not his nails but the skin around them, his lips, inside his mouth, and time took a tiny chunk out his hand) and finding work to do. Aiden's ADHD is very low in the aggression and anger, he does still have it but his ADHD is more on the social and focus stuff. Aiden also has an adrenaline addiction and depression. He also has an addictive personality.
Taylor and Tyler are intersex. It's only on the hormonal level but it's still there. (Do you see the vision???)
Ben hates that he's mute. He does and doesn't have a choice in it. He wants to speak often but something just stops him, it's like a part of him has his hands around his throat just like the day he lost his voice.
Logan is actually really competitive but it has to be something he's good at to really get him going. Tyler found that out during trivia game in the back of one of these classes (they decided to not pay attention and okay a random Kahoot. Logan won.)
It is also confirmed Tyler would be in cosmetology if it want for the scholarship baseball gives him. SO. He dyes Aiden hair, he and Taylor has dyed purple hair at one point. He knows how to do piercings, he did his and his sisters. He has more than her (nose and all ear pericings possible).
None of the group is hetero. None. Ashlyn is the closest to it and that's just cuz she's be Demiromantic and heterosexual. Ben comes in second place for that and that because he's bi but female leaning cuz men scare him. (He be the opposite of most people lmao) Aiden is Pan but doesn't really understand it. Tayler is unlabeled cuz she just likes whoever the fuck. Tyler is a literal raging Bi but doesnt think about it cuz he be busy. And Logan is most likely gay or that one thing that's attracted to like masculinity.
Remember that one scene of Ashlyn popping her bones? Tyler has that when he wakes up in the mornings. He does sports. He gonna snap crackle pop.
Aiden has only had four hospital visits before, he actually more careful then people give him credit for. That and Ben stops him a lot.
Ben sticks closer to Aiden even more now because he heard and saw him die.
Aiden and Ben's sister bully each other.
Tyler once had someone ask him out randomly and he was so confused so he was like "Uhm... No? I think?" Because he was up late trying to help his mom pay bills the night before and didn't understand what she said. The baseball team would not stop bullying him for that the rest of their freshman year.
Taylor had an emo phase in middle school which made Tyler follow suit. They were emos in middle school, I know they were. The hair says it all.
The group has two sets of matching outfits that they wear randomly and somehow always wear on the same days without even communicating it. S
Ashlyn becomes a big baby on her period and me willingly let's Adien and or Tyler carry her around. Taylor just gets really mean and aggressive (becomes Tyler 2.0 frfr) or just cries randomly and it stresses our boys out.
Ashlyn knows baby sign language so she can understand some stuff Ben says to Aiden when they us ASL thinking the group isn't paying attention.
Logan writes fanfiction. I'm not elaborating.
Tyler and Taylor both were princesses one holloween and literally everyone thought they was a third one, making them triplets. People from their middle school that go to their current school still ask if their other sister is doing okay and Tyler dies inside a little every time.
Tyler hates mayonnaise. I feel like he'd hate it.
Ashlyn hates Tartar sauce. Like she will punch anyone who tries to give it to her.
Aiden forgets to eat a lot and has to eat timers to remember.
They all share clothes but Aiden and Ashlyn share more than everyone else. Specifically with each other. They trade a lot.
Logan is constantly missing his sweaters because of Ashlyn stealing them.
They all signed each other shoes on the inner left ones with their initials.
Ben tried not to stick out as much as possible because of trauma.
Logan is edging into his emo phase soon. He'd be the fancy emo, more like and e boy but less cringe.
Aiden worships Lady Gaga. No further explanation.
Everyone gives Aiden the side eye when he plays party rockers (party walkers). He just vibes. (He's actually trying to keep the memory of Ashlyn face in his brain so he doesn't fail her again.)
Taylor has a middle school relationship with a girl one time. It ended cuz she moved away and Taylor was like a sad puppy for two weeks.
That's all bye now
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spaceasianmillennial · 7 months ago
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SUFFS Notes: So I've seen both the off-Broadway and Broadway version
2 years earlier, I experienced the Public version of Suffs (before Hillary Clinton and Malala Yousafzai got producer credits). I even own two press scripts.
The Broadway Suffs opening is "Let Mother Vote" and oh I did fell in love with this opening because of how well it established the Carrie's conservative formation and showed us just how seductive it can be. I also kinda miss the older version that opened with woman and non-binary performers dressed as anti-suffrage men making all these awful anti-suffs slogans. By dressing up as the patriachy, these women and non-binary actors really own the story. The Broadway version has less emphasis on ensemble anti-suffs.
Anyone who has seen the Broadway version know that President Woodrow Wilson (Grace McLean) can't stop singing about "Ladies" and their proper domestic place. Now the off-Broadway run has an comedic ironic payoff to this. President Wilson suddenly gets a chest pain, a stroke, and it is a silly moment (I remember the entire theatre laughing hard). We see a few blackouts of him suffering, and SUDDENLY COSTUME CHANGE, Grace McLean is standing there in a black dress, now playing First Lady Edith Wilson, who took up "Stewardship" when her husband was disabled by his stroke. So Edith starts signing some of his paperwork, ("tariff reform, YOUR FAVORITE") and she runs into a paper that says, "Support for Ratification of the Suffrage Amendment." The stage direction indicates she might be on the "verge of epiphany," and she wonders if she should support it, but then she's like "Absolutely NO!" and rips it. It's a funny way of indicating that just because a First Lady has a Presidential role, that doesn't mean she has empathy for women's rights.
I can see why they cut from the Public, but I do miss the silly transformation sequence of President Wilson‘s stroke and Edith Wilson’s stewardship. (Just cause a First Lady got handed power, doesn’t mean she’s gonna save you.)
One striking change is more conspicuous racial stratification in the cast whereas Aisha de Haas, a Black actor, played the white socialite/Tennessee mother at the Public. Light-skinned BIPOC play white characters, and the Broadway script/direction nods a little more when a dark-skinned BIPOC is in a white role.
For example, in the Broadway version, a Black Tsilala Brock plays the white Irish Dudley and President Wilson utters the lines, "honest for an Irishman!" to bring deliberate attention to the race-bent casting.
Also, the Filipino actress Jaygee Macapugay plays the white Mollie Hay. When Wilson says, "The south will never let ladies vote, let alone colored ladies, thank God," he condescendingly takes Mollie Hay by the waist and Jaygee scrunches this deliberately astonished expression at "colored ladies."
The Broadway version cuts out verses of an anonymous Chinese American suffrage who brought her baby to a march. So I went to the Broadway SUFFS with a Black woman seatmate (who never caught the older version) and she felt the musical didn't directly address other suffrage ethnicities outside of white women and Black women. Yes, there is a diversity of BIPOC people playing white suffrages in both versions (and other backgrounders of color are somewhat suggestive of unnamed suffrages of color who did exist), but now there's no longer a direct acknowledgment of Asian suffrages.
The Broadway did some good work to add a sequence of Inez Milholland (Hannah Cruz) working herself to the bone and exhausting herself across states, with a succession of banners signaling another location, leading to her tragic death. It hits way harder than the off-Broadway version (where Phillipa Soo played Inez).
The Broadway version of Suffs tightened some of the numbers. For example, "When We Are Married/If We Are Married" were separate private moments. The Broadway version combined them and juxtaposition the kisses between the heterosexual Dudley and Doris Stevens ("When We Are Married") with the clandestine lesbian Mollie Hay and Carrie Chapman Catt ("IF We Were Married").
Mollie and Carrie did not kiss in the older iteration. So the script goes from Mollie and Carrie "They want to kiss, but there are people around" to "both couples kiss." A moment where Mollie tells Carrie, "Carrie, it's getting late. Come upstairs" (a major hint of their relationship) was also not in the off-Broadway version.
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meeks-just-wants-to-scroll · 3 months ago
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Lucie / Cooper Davies Info Dump! 🎀✨
This is a disorganized because I just want to talk about one of my favorite characters from Hare, Fox, and The Moon (written by me and @cupiidskiss ♥️)
This means there will be spoilers for Hare Fox Moon, but I’ll keep major spoilers to the end.
🎀💕🎀💕🎀
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Who is Lucie?
Lucie is an American citizen of German-French decent in his mid 20’s. He/she is introduced in chapter 9 (Argument) as a cross dressing man of the night.
“‘I’m not a waiter, honey,’ grinned the… man? Malt squinted at him and noticed the more defined jaw bone and masculine features under the makeup… His lipstick lips parted, ‘I can get you and I something if you’d want. Only if you treat me, just one night.’ His voice is husky for someone of similar stature to Malt, maybe shorter, thicker in some places, and lacking facial hair.”
Lucie was introduced into the story, a little on a whim so Malt would have someone to talk to and progress the plot while Malt and Boone had their first major plot point where they were away from each other. She later developed into an askew parallel of Malt and Boone’s relationship.
Lucie functions as tangible proof that Boone has a history of non-heterosexual behavior, which is a step forward in the “is Boone gay for Malt?” plot.
“‘Boone.’ The prostitutes eyes went wide. ‘Boone Quinn?’ Malt nodded. ‘Oh wooow, I really did twist the wires in his head, didn’t I?… He was one of my clients.’”
Up until then, the audience assumes Boone has always been this gruff, blood hungry cishet man. Lucie happily explains (at a price) how Boone is actually a softie and bends easily to the allure of femininity. While Boone has internalized homophobia problems, it is implied numerous times that Boone enjoyed his night with Lucie. It is mentioned a few times how Boone even thinks about Lucie and what their night together meant.
“boone whipped his body around to finally face malt. ‘that [night together] was a one time thing, i don’t…i don’t want to think about it. it was a mistake.’ … ‘i don’t know... how i feel… i mean, fuck. im a man. he looked like a woman but. I just.’ shame dwelled in his chest, he felt sick almost. ‘i think about it so much. i shouldn’t be thinking about it this much’” (chapter 15, Boner).
Lucie offers Malt an openly queer man he could bang, but Malt passes on it because he (unaware of it rn) is terribly dependent on Boone and can’t imagine picking anyone else.
Lucie’s first appearance is a little brief, and without the context of who Cooper Davies is, a reader would think Lucie was a one time character.
Cooper Davies 💈
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Cooper Davies is Lucie by day! He works as a barber in Saint Denis and is well liked for his charisma and ease of conversing. He has feminine features, but not enough to make people judge him. He passes well enough as an eccentric cishet man to exist in the world without trouble (as of 1898 at least). He has a roommate-partner of sorts who is a working girl. The two of them pass well enough as a straight couple to help keep Cooper’s homosexual behavior out of the limelight.
The first time Cooper is mentioned is in chapter 24 (that isn’t released as of the moment). His scene is brief, only being present at Wallace Station to buy Boone and Malt tickets to get back to Saint Denis after… a lot happened to Malt and Boone. After Boone offered Cooper a pseudo name when they met, the text states,
“cooper took in that boone didn’t use his real name—or maybe that was his real name, boone quinn could have been a fake name for all he knew, and he knew many things” (chapter 24).
Lucie and Cooper and never stated to be the same people, but it is hinted in segments throughout the chapter how Cooper recognized Boone, and how Boone vaguely recognized Cooper’s face but couldn’t pin point where. He later misremembers and says he recognized him from the barber shop (which isn’t wrong but also isn’t the full picture).
Cooper has had a history of indulging in underground drag and frequenting a secret queer bar called The Golden Lantern. He later began selling his services around the bar and streets for a little extra cash. It’s not a necessity but a thing he does to express himself. He spends more of the night talking and connecting with the queer community than actually having transactions.
It is illustrated later in the story that Cooper lives in an upper floor apartment outside of La Bastile (the saloon Boone frequents) and began to study Boone after their night together. He already people watched, painted, and wrote poetry from his balcony so it wasn’t too odd for him to begin noticing Boone’s habits.
Like I said with the askew parallels: Malt and Cooper both obsess over Boone and are queer men with feminine characteristics. The thing that sets them apart is how Cooper is accepted into society, while Malt is perpetually at the outskirts and unable to carve a fulfilling life in Saint Denis.
Cooper forever longs from a distance, too chicken to initiate an interaction with Boone again. Boone doesn’t know Lucie is Cooper, so when Boone comes in to the barber shop, Cooper can’t naturally bring it up without outing himself as queer. Since the interaction is business, neither gets to be especially close even in a customer and employee way.
Malt gets to have hands on interactions with Boone day in and day out, but he lacks any career or family outside of what Boone provides. His obsession is not just that, it’s also a dependency, and that’s partially why Lucie feels bad for Malt by the end of the story…
Spoilers for the end of Hare, Fox, Moon‼️
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Cooper has a speaking role one other time in Malt’s epilogue. By then, the time is somewhere in the 1910’s and Boone had been hung.
His possessions could have been reclaimed by anyone who stepped up to take them, but no one did; Boone had no kin, no partner, no friends, no one who remembered him for being anything but a brutal man who womanized.
Cooper didn’t step forward to take the belongings because he was convinced he was a nobody to Boone and had no right to own his possessions, even if Cooper badly wanted to keep them. He thought it was selfish to take something that didn’t belong to him, clinging to a deadman’s memory.
Instead, he stashed drawings, poems, newspaper clippings and excerpts. Way back, he used to watch Malt and Boone laugh and smile and grow undoubtedly close. Cooper became so infatuated with Malt and Boone because Cooper saw it as a way to voyeuristically satiate his desire.
So when Malt bumbled into Saint Denis after ~11 years, Cooper was heart broken to realize Malt came to reunite with Boone. He had to delicately (without outing himself as being Lucie) inform Malt that Boone had been dead for a while.
Little remained to remember Boone by, most people forgot about his death, just yet another name in the newspaper of criminals. This broke Malt because all the tangible things Boone gave him (braided hair, bolo tie, hair flowers, gun holster, food chain knife, custom engraved revolver) were all gone, lost to the sands of time.
Feeling bad for only being able to offer bad news, Cooper gives his heartfelt collection of Boone memorabilia to Malt. He tells Malt a little bit about why he has so many hand-made things of the two of them, but overall lets the papers speak for themselves.
Now, this part breaks my heart, but Malt is a wanted criminal and Martelli’s mafia wants him dead. When Cooper is questioned for his involvement talking to a criminal, he reluctantly tells the officers where he last saw Malt heading. He is inconsolable that he had to do that to keep himself, his girlfriend, and his family safe. ;-; in one action, he killed the last remnant of his fixation from all those years ago.
While the epilogue ends rather grimly, it is possible for Cooper to have a kind of happy ending. Cooper and Kathrine are two of the only people who survive til the end of the story and had any personal interaction with Boone. Me and Paige joke that they trauma bond and have a “meh” happy ending together as friends in a corrupt city that is somehow even worse than it was before.
🎀💕🎀💕
That is the bulk of the info dump, I just really like her design and story. Sighhhh, Lucie and Malt could have been such friends together, If only Lucie/Cooper had the balls to talk to his crushes.
also bonus info i had no easy way to slot in!:
Lucie / Cooper has gynecomastia :)
when at work, he loosely binds, but since his chest isn’t that big and he wears layers, he doesn’t have to worry.
when dressed as Lucie, he wears a pushup bra to make it look more like breasts.
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jbuffyangel · 6 months ago
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The Love We Deserve: Arrow 2x06 Review (Keep Your Enemies Closer)
This is the episode I knew the writers were going THERE with Olicity. I wasn’t sure about endgame. I certainly did not know how Oliver and Felicity’s story would unfold, but “Keep Your Enemies Closer” confirmed we were in this, fam. We were in this all the way.
2013 Jen's live reaction:
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Let’s dig in…
Olicity
The first scene immediately sets up this juxtaposition between Felicity, Oliver and Isabel and it carries through the episode. It’s not a love triangle. Isabel doesn’t matter enough to warrant a point on a triangle, but they use her (quite effectively I might add) to show Oliver and Felicity are anything but “just friends.”
Isabel is bitching at Oliver for whatever-he-failed-to-do-this-week and Felicity is trying to get his attention for some arrow (Roy Harper) related business. Initially, she tries using “Mr. Queen” in a very boss/employee way, but ultimately is fed up with being ignored and yells “Oliver!”
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Isabel barely tosses Felicity a glance, but Oliver ends the Co-CEO argument to leave with Felicity. Trust me when I say, Isabel clocks this decision.
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Source: @okmcintyre
Oliver and Felicity join Diggle in his search for Lyla Michaels. She went to Russia to search for Deadshot and now she’s missing. Oliver uses a Queen Consolidated subsidiary in Moscow as their cover story and use of the company jet. Unfortunately, Isabel tags along. She believes Oliver is meeting with their overseas partners behind her back. Once she discovered Oliver didn’t have any meetings planned with their subsidiary in Moscow, her accusations shift to Felicity.
Oliver: I’m not this person you think I am.
Isabel: That depends.
Oliver: On what?
Isabel: On if I think you used the corporate jet for a weekend of fun with your assistant.
Oliver: Excuse me?
He does his very best to look incredulous at the idea of hooking up with Felicity while on a romantic weekend in Moscow. I really wouldn’t put Russia on my Top 10 list of romantic getaways. Tahiti made a lot more sense, but whatever. The point is – Oliver’s feathers are immediately ruffled. Did I see him blushing? Oliver lies all day every day both professionally and personally, but this line of questioning has him quite tongue tied.
Isabel: A blonde IT girl all of a sudden gets promoted to be assistant to the CEO? There are only two ways that happens. One is nepotism and she doesn’t look like your cousin.
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Source: Paigeota
It absolutely should be happening, Oliver.
Isabel: What were her qualifications aside from an abundance of short skirts?
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Source: Paigeota
This scene is incredibly important because A) it’s hilarious and B) this is the first time Arrow has addressed OUTLOUD Felicity Smoak as a love interest for Oliver Queen. Everything up until now has been gazing, fervent glances, shoulder touches, soft tones, sexual innuendo and the electric chemistry between Stephen Amell and Emily Bett Rickards. But Isabel puts her money on the table and flat out accuses Oliver of sleeping with Felicity.
We, the audience, know Oliver and Felicity are not having sex (much to our horror and disappointment), but Isabel presents the one question we’ve been dying to ask Oliver – does he WANT to sleep with Felicity? And his answer is… glorious.
First he laughs, uncomfortably, like this is the most INSANE line of questioning to ever take place. Keep in mind this man was tortured on Lian Yu for information about bombs, planes, the location of a Chinese archer and Japanese soldiers bones from WWII. But nope, Oliver is shocked – SHOCKED I TELL YOU – that anyone would ever think he’s having sex with Felicity. Methinks he doth protest too much.
But Oliver trips up at the mention of skirts. He stutters his way through defending Felicity. It is damn near gallant of him to argue they are an appropriate length. No ma'am, the skirts are not too short. Not for Oliver Queen!
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We can chalk this up to Oliver being a flesh and blood heterosexual man. The day they stop looking is the day they die. But this is the first time anyone has asked Oliver if he is sexually attracted to Felicity. He blushes, laughs, protests and stammers his way through his answer like a 13 year old boy.
Also, it’s extremely important to remember one episode prior Oliver was rejecting Laurel Lance in her apartment hallway after she tried to kiss him - his primary female love interest. Then the very next episode, the writers are crafting a scene forcing Oliver to address a romantic relationship with Felicity.
Is it a funny scene? Yes, but the real win for Olicity shippers is the question is being ASKED. The answer is even better. Yes, Oliver has noticed the skirts and the spectacular legs that go with them. You don’t say that about a character who is going to remain a platonic, comic relief Girl Wednesday.
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We are so far from done. Diggle infiltrates the Russian prison where Lyla is being held while Oliver and Felicity meet up with Anatoly to purchase a Russian police car as part of their escape plan. Felicity is extremely anxious about Diggle, so Oliver offers her some witty banter and a shoulder touch as reassurance.
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When the Russians try to fleece Oliver he threatens to make their children orphans in Russian.
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It’s all very Bratva Oliver and menacing, but with Felicity he makes a little joke and winks! One could say his demeanor is quite light hearted – dare I say flirting?
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Source: Paigeota
Oliver returns to the hotel and has a drink with Isabel. Bizarrely, he brings up Felicity again – unprompted. He couldn’t wiggle out of this line of questioning fast enough and now he can’t stop bringing it up! Pick a lane, my dude.
Oliver: Does everyone really think that Felicity and I are…
EXPLAIN THE DOT DOT DOT OLIVER! LET'S BE SPECIFIC!
Isabel: No. Just everyone who works at Queen Consolidated.
My kingdom to hang out by the water cooler in that office.
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More with the loud chuckling. Nothing to see here but friendship. Look at all the friendship. Hardy har har.
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Isabel: You don’t seem like the kind of man who has female friends.
That’s the understatement of the century. Putting Oliver’s sexual partners aside for the moment - Felicity is in a unique position. Oliver doesn’t have a lot of friends let alone female friends. Felicity is also the only female in his life who knows he’s the Arrow. Has he told her everything about his past? No, but relax. We’re only on Season 2. 
Oliver has shared quite a lot with Felicity in a relatively short amount of time. He trusts her (as much as he's capable of) and Oliver does not trust easily. Felicity is the only woman Oliver can be completely and authentically himself with. This makes her more than unique – it makes Felicity special. I think Oliver understands that and he approaches their friendship with reverence. He toes a very strict line with Felicity – for a very good reason which he will reveal later on in the episode.
Isabel: Underneath that swagger, I see you pretty clearly. You’re intelligent, driven and lonely.
Isabel reveals she doesn’t buy Oliver’s bad boy routine and instead believes she shares a lot in common with him. We can take this conversation one of two ways – 1) two people connecting over vodka and a shared ability to speak Russian or 2) Oliver is working Isabel to keep the real reason for this trip a secret. Bonus? He gets laid in the process.
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Clearly, I’m going with option 2. He feeds her a line about loneliness in Russian and Isabel practically races Oliver back to the hotel room.
Mercifully, we don’t have to watch them have sex. Oliver is pressed for time because they need to save Diggle, but Isabel is fine with the wham bam thank you ma'am. Oliver thinks he left enough time, but as he opens the door to his hotel there stands Felicity just about to knock.
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Oliver left Isabel undressed and in his bed, but the woman finds her clothes with lightning speed when she hears Felicity at the door and purposefully makes her exit then.
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If Isabel bought Oliver’s “we’re just friends” speech then doing this would not be necessary. Isabel wants Felicity to know they slept together. Regardless of what people at Queen Consolidated think, Isabel knows there’s more going on between them than Oliver will admit. She wants to hurt Felicity. Isabel is marking her territory and I would encourage you to listen to Stephen Amell’s thoughts on why. #Cosigned.
However, this is NOT information Oliver wants Felicity to know. He is so embarrassed he can’t even look at Felicity as Isabel walks out the door.
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Felicity is stunned. She’s actually speechless. Oliver tries to offer up some feeble explanation, but he doesn’t get very far. 
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Felicity immediately makes a joke to alleviate the tension, but as she turns we can see her hurt and anger.
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She cannot fathom a reason why Oliver would sleep with this woman. Whether or not Oliver heard Felicity’s remarks – he grimaces because he knows he screwed up. BIG TIME. It is so awkward and painful.
But again, the viewers must ask a fundamental question – why is this scene being written like Felicity caught Oliver cheating on her? Oliver is single. Isabel is single. Felicity is single. Nobody is dating anybody. And yet, the Arrow writers make it clear Felicity is hurt by this encounter – like she’s been betrayed.
As for Oliver, he absolutely did NOT want Felicity to know he slept with Isabel. He knows it will hurt her. This shows Oliver is somewhat aware Felicity has feelings for him. Congratulations, Oliver you’re not a total pine tree.
What’s more telling is Oliver’s reaction. He acts like Felicity caught him doing something wrong. If he didn’t return Felicity’s feelings then her opinion wouldn’t really matter. It’s never stopped him from dating or sleeping with other women before. And this is just a one night stand. Not even – it was a quickie. But Oliver is ashamed. This makes him look bad. Generally speaking, when you have romantic feelings for someone you don’t want that person to see you hooking up with someone else. It sends a very mixed message.
THIS IS NOT HOW YOU WRITE A PLATONIC COUPLE!!!
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Felicity Smoak wears her heart on her sleeve. She can’t let it go. It’s not just that Oliver slept with someone. It’s that he slept with ISABEL. The woman who is trying to steal his company. Her bitchiness is embedded in her DNA, so Felicity’s work environment probably less than fun. Felicity cannot stand Isabel and Oliver slept with her. HER. 
Felicity: Over 64 million women over the age of consent in Russia and you sleep with her.
But this time it is Oliver’s turn to make a joke to deflect. The entire vibe is couple’s fight.
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Source: Paigeota
But Felicity is not joking when they get home and she’s tired of the mixed messages. So ask the question point blank. God bless her. No sexual innuendos, stammers, deflections, furtive glances or unspoken truths.
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 Source: Paigeota
Oliver’s initial response is kind of flippant to be honest.
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 Source: Paigeota
He gives Felicity a very generic “It just happened,” which is the exact non-explanation cheaters use. Sex doesn’t “just happen.” It’s a decision. Oliver made a choice and Felicity is trying to understand why because maybe if she understands then it will hurt less. Even worse, he says it didn’t mean anything. The problem is it meant something to Felicity. Take it away Willow Rosenberg.
Xander: We were just kissing. It doesn't mean that much.
Willow: No. It just means you'd rather be with someone you hate, than be with me. - BTVS "Innocence"
Truly one of the most devastating lines in television history delivered by an equally heart wrenching performance by Alyson Hannigan. What Felicity is truly asking Oliver is not, “Why her?” but rather, “Why not me?”
Felicity’s disappointment in Oliver’s response is palpable and feels very similar to their scene in 1x12 when she asked Oliver if she could trust him. She didn’t want a flip answer then and she doesn’t want one now.
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Source: Paigeota
Oliver lowers his voice into his gentle Felicity tone and says, “Hey,” so she’ll look at him again. The real intimacy between them is revealed in a single word. He cannot wiggle out of this, so Oliver is approaching her question, and pain, with the reverence she deserves. Felicity closes her eyes for a moment before she meets Oliver’s gaze again, like she’s steeling herself against whatever explanation is coming next. This time the answer will be honest, but it will hurt more.
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Source: Paigeota
Oliver speaks hypothetically of course, in an attempt to discuss what he feels for Felicity without really discussing it. It keeps their friendship in this little protective bubble as Oliver takes an infinitesimally small step over the strict line he has drawn between them. Oliver feels life as The Arrow, and his proximity to danger, prevents him being in a loving relationship. He slept with Isobel because he doesn’t care about her. Oliver won’t be with Felicity because he does care about her.
What is MONUMENTALLY IMPORTANT about this scene is Oliver acknowledges the elephant in the room for the very first time. He feels more than friendship for Felicity.  Does Oliver Queen love Felicity Smoak? Yes. Is he ready to admit that to himself - let alone to her? No. Oliver believes his love endangers Felicity. He cannot lose her, so he will not allow himself to love her. As frustrating as Oliver’s answer is it’s not difficult to understand why he feels this way - especially after losing Tommy.
Felicity gives a little nod like this was the explanation she expected, but still needed to hear. Despite the hypothetical, they both know Oliver is speaking about her. Rather than a meaningful relationship, Oliver has resigned himself to a life of loneliness. He may have hook ups and one night stands to fill his bed and relieve an urge, but he withholds access to his heart. This is not just about Oliver’s refusal to truly love someone. It’s also about his refusal to allow anyone to love him in return.
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He's taken bullets that hurt less than this.
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In the end, it’s Felicity’s response that truly packs the emotional punch. She believes Oliver deserves better, regardless of his way of life. He deserves more than empty affairs and lonely, dark and violent nights.
There is so much this man cannot forgive himself for and the guilt is overwhelming. Oliver believes he has no right to happiness. Loneliness is his penance.  When all you experience is pain and loss it can be difficult to imagine a life without it.
"We accept the love we think we deserve." - Perks of Being a Wallflower
Oliver hurt Felicity deeply by sleeping with Isabel.  They both know it. He continues to hurt her by drawing this line in the sand between them. Yet, in the face of that pain, Felicity dreams a life for Oliver that’s more than the one he’s resigned himself to. It is forgiveness, compassion and unconditional love in action. He does not feel worthy of Felicity Smoak, but those are the lies Oliver’s guilt tells him. She knows the truth.
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Source: Paigeota
The stunned look on his face says it all - no one has ever told Oliver Queen he deserves to be loved. 
John Diggle
Contrary to the previous six pages, this is actually a John Diggle focused episode. And boy, does he drop a bomb on Oliver and Felicity.
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Oliver didn’t immediately recognize Lyla’s name, which is fine because I don’t think they’ve shared a scene. Felicity reminds him Lyla is John’s ARGUS girlfriend and I had whiplash at that status update. Girlfriend? When did we get to girlfriend? I feel more comfortable with super spy sexy time friend.
Diggle lowers the boom. Lyla Michaels is his ex-wife. SAY WHAT??!
Felicity: Explain that sentence.
Honestly, how do Oliver and Felicity not know this yet? What do they talk about in the bunker? It can’t always be about crimes and arrows. Sharing is caring OTA – embrace it.
Diggle: We couldn’t figure out how to stay married without a war to fight.
Diggle and Lyla were married while on tour in Afghanistan, but divorced shortly after returning home. Lyla joined ARGUS and Diggle went back for another tour.
Diggle and Oliver hook up with Anatoly (!!!) and he informs them Lyla was trying to break into the worst prison in Russia on a tip that Deadshot was being held there. Unfortunately, she was captured. It hasn’t been a pleasant stay given how battered Lyla is looking.
The only way in Gulag is to be a prisoner, so Diggle volunteers. Oliver balks at that, but Diggle needs him on the outside make the moves necessary for an escape. Also, Lyla is Diggle’s woman and he's going to save her, damn it. SWOON. Find you a man with a hero's complex. They make divine husbands. I speak from experience.
Anatoly provides enough drugs to land Diggle in prison for 400 years. Oliver and Felicity are nervous about this plan. In one of the sweetest moments between Diggle and Felicity, she gently kisses him on the cheek and wraps his scarf around his neck. It’s a good luck kiss, but everyone is clearly worried it’s a goodbye.
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Of course, once John is inside he runs right into Deadshot. He sure is easy to find for a globetrotting criminal mastermind. Deadshot knows where Lyla is being held and wants in on the escape plan in exchange for her location. After Deadshot kills Anatoly’s guard, John has no choice but to team up with him.
Lyla: You came for me.
Diggle: I always have and I always will.
This is what stellar ships are made of folks. This is the content we're here for.
Of course, Oliver and Felicity rescue Diggle, Lyla and Deadshot, but the pinnacle of the episode for John is when they dump Deadshot on the side of the road. They’ll help him get out of prison, but not out of the country. John holds a gun on him – ready to pull the trigger to avenge his brother’s death, but he can’t do it.
Deadshot: That’s the thing about honor, John. You can’t turn it on and off.
What a great line! I love that line!!! It’s so fully encapsulates John Diggle’s character. I’m sorry I know he’s a killer, but between Deadshot bringing Olicity together with the ridden computer and this moment with John– I’m really starting to like this guy.
Deadshot offers John some additional information about his brother’s death. A thank you for not killing him I guess. He asks John how he thought Andy was killed.
Diggle: You shot at a client that Andy was protecting and you missed.
Deadshot: I don’t miss. Your brother was the contract.
Diggle: Who would want to kill Andy?
Deadshot: I don’t know their names, just an alias. H.I.V.E.
The plot thickens! I’m sure all the comic fans were excited about the introduction of H.I.V.E. I was clueless, but with a quick Google you’ll discover H.I.V.E is a terrorist organization. So, this means one of two things, John’s brother was an honorable man who ticked off a terrorist organization or Andy was not as honorable as his brother and ticked off a terrorist organization. This adds a layer of complexity the Diggle vs. Deadshot storyline desperately needed. It was running a little stale.
Diggle: You know me and Carly broke up because I couldn’t love her and hate him at the same time.
Lyla: I’m honored to be the exception.
Diggle: Lyla, you were always the exception.
Ok, I’m onboard the SS Dyla. Let’s get remarried. I’m ready.  
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We go from the Dyla love scene directly to Olicity’s final scene in the office. This is not a mistake. John guides Oliver on his path. This also includes his romantic life and one of the ways Diggle guides Oliver is by example. Dyla always points the way.
Stray Thoughts
This is the first episode we meet Amanda Waller. She’s loyal to Lyla Michaels and knows about Oliver and Diggle’s vigilante operation, so she’s arriving on the scene as a fully formed bad ass.  
Diggle refused Anatoly’s vodka. Based on the look Oliver gave him I’m guessing that was a very bad idea. Drink the vodka, John.
“I wouldn’t mind a drink.” I mean honestly the boys could be so sexist sometimes. Felicity likes booze too!
“I will take care of her.” Snort. Yeah, I’ll bet Oliver.
Isobel immediately jumps to the conclusion that Felicity is sleeping her way up to the top. Way to be supportive of your fellow female coworkers and fighting that glass ceiling together, Isobel. This just makes her more evil in my opinion.
Sara left town. That’s fine I need a break from the Lance drama.
Quentin lets Roy go because he's working with the Arrow too, so I'm counting Lance as part of the team.
No Laurel. Hallelujah. Did you even notice she was gone? Nope. This character lifts right out.
There’s this whole weird subplot where Moira’s lawyer wants Thea to dump Roy because he’s a felon and it makes Moira look bad. Sure, Roy Harper is the problem. Not the 500 people who died. Even Moira thinks this plot line is ridiculously stupid and gets these crazy kids back together. Can we be done with the Theroy breakups? I’m tired. Find these two an actual storyline.
Slade: I will not be the reason something happens to you.
Shado: When I care about someone there's nothing I won't do for them.
Slade is in rough freaking shape after being burned over half his body, but he gets snuggle time with Shado so it isn’t all bad.
Never trust a Russian woman. Has Oliver ever seen a movie?
Flashback Sara betrays Oliver and gives Ivo the location of Slade, Shado and the soldier bones. Let's go with Stockholm syndrome to explain this insanity. Or she's just completely terrified of Ivo. Either works. But still - dick move Sara.
Why does David Ramsey wear shirts? It’s really a crime against humanity.
Listen to the Watchover podcast reaction to 2x06!!!
If you’d like to support the blog, please buy me a cup of tea!
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endwersed · 6 months ago
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WIP Wednesday
Cashing in on the open tag from the amazing @renmackree 💖
Here's a bit more from my current Sterek FWB AU - you don't see me. Derek continues to be straight (ha, sure) and Stiles continues to enable him. A li'l nsfw.
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“I feel like I should argue, on account of your heterosexuality, and all,” Stiles says, tongue darting out to wet his lips for a second, “but I’m definitely way too horny to be a gentleman right now, so… get your pants off and get over here, Hale.”
Derek doesn’t quite trip and fall into a heap on the floor in his haste to step out of his shorts and briefs – but it’s a pretty near thing.
The clothes leave a dark cotton puddle behind his hurried footsteps, and it’s barely any time at all before he finds himself kneeing his way onto the bed, the soft mattress dipping beneath him as he chases Stiles towards the centre of it. Stiles has this huge, borderline ridiculous grin on his face as he watches Derek catch up to him, his eyes lidded, the brown almost entirely eaten up by the black of his pupils as he looks his fill.
In the mussed-up sheets, his fingers flex and unflex, pulling the fabric between his knuckles as he rolls his bottom lip between his teeth. The inviting smile remains around it.
Without a word needing to pass between them, Stiles leans himself up and rolls himself over, flopping down onto his belly, the round of his perky ass now on full display for Derek’s laser focus. He pulls his legs underneath himself and shoves his shoulders against the bed, presenting himself face down and ass up, his knees shifting apart as he twists his head on the pillow to peer at Derek over his shoulder.
Derek knows he looks more than a little moronic right now; blinking down at Stiles with a gaping mouth, his hand curled tightly around his dick to stroke himself to full hardness – not that it takes much at all. But there’s very little he can do about it when it feels like his brain is threatening to leak out of his ears pretty much any second now.
“Condom?” he just about finds the cells to ask.
Immediately, he kind of really hates himself for even offering in the first place. Truly, he cannot think of something on this godforsaken earth that he wants more than to feel Stiles' tight, hot asshole clinging around his raw cock.
But it's what he should do; it's the right thing to do. So, even as he burns to bite them back, he lets the words spill from his lips just like acid, all the same.
Derek's skin grows hot with a renewed hunger when Stiles gives a quick shake of his head.
“I’m not seeing anyone. Still clean.” He shoves his forearms beneath the pillow he rests his head against, hips hitching just that little bit backwards, still not quite close enough for any skin-to-skin contact. “You?”
Derek feels something settle in the deep recesses of his bones, hearing that from Stiles. A question, unasked but introspectively obsessed upon, all the same, has been nudging at his bristling consciousness ever since Scott and Allison’s engagement party. A question of whether anything had blossomed from Scott practically forcing Stiles to meet that loser Brad.
He knows that they swapped numbers, couldn’t get away from the conversation fast enough to avoid hearing Stiles telling Scott all a-fucking-bout it. But he could never find the right way to ask Stiles whether anything came of that exchange; whether this… thing between them, between Derek and Stiles, had a quickly approaching expiry date, because somebody finally clued up and realised that Stiles is quite possibly the ultimate gay catch.
With a deep-seated sense of tranquility, he knows, now. Stiles isn’t seeing anyone. Stiles is still in this, with him. Stiles is still… his.
Whatever the fuck that means.
“Yeah,” Derek finally answers Stiles’ returned question. “Still clean, too.”
Stiles flashes him a grin, all teeth and promise.
“Then what are you waiting for, big guy?” he goads. “I was ready before you even joined the party.”
-
Low low low pressure tags 🥰 @dear-massacre @eevylynn @hedwig221b @lucky-bishop @violetfairydust
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qqueenofhades · 2 years ago
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So I think it's a safe assumption that Ivan knew from the beginning about the plan to put Alina in the collar and for the Darkling to claim her power. It's something that he, as the Darkling's second in command, would probably have to know and was involved with planning in the first place. It wasn't just sprung on him as soon as they got there. We also know that he Does Not Like her and think she's a spoiled, sheltered, arrogant little brat and just generally annoyed with her Heterosexual Bullshit. We can safely say that he knew about and supported the Darkling taking her power because she wasn't able to do what needed to be done with it herself, and that she would never go along with his true plans. Whether Ivan knows that the Darkling is like five hundred years old and was the one who created the Fold is up for debate (though I'm of the opinion that he figured it out himself and that the Darkling is well aware Ivan knows his secret).
That brings up the question of Fedyor. How much did he know? How much DOES he know now? Clearly he doesn't realize a huge amount about the stag and the plan to give Alina an amplifier, just because he instantly assumes Ivan will be coming with him to go after Nina and doesn't know what else the Darkling needs Ivan for. Does he even know that Morozov's stag is real? Does he know what happened to Alina after the fete? How much has Ivan and the Darkling told him about everything, and how (and when) does he eventually find out that the Darkling has taken Alina's power via the stag and gone into the Fold?
After that, of course, what does he think about everything and what is his opinion of what Ivan and the Darkling have done? I imagine he's pretty close to Alina - he acts plenty familiar with her and Genya and is shown to be good friends with Nadia as well, and would definitely care about what happened to her. I'm trying to remember exactly what the chronology of the show is and what happens when, but he's sent off after Nina before the others go after Alina, and he knows she's run away, right? There's no way he would just be okay with them locking a collar of bone around her neck and calling it good. No way he'd be okay with them stealing her power and controlling her no matter what their intentions are. Like, he's absolutely be able to see where they're coming from and understand why they're doing it and why Ivan has the opinion of Alina that he does, but Fedyor would completely disagree with it. What's it like for him knowing what they've done, and what Ivan's part in all of it was?
Welp. This is exactly what I'm exploring right now in We Could Stay Like This Forever, where Ivan still doesn't see anything fundamentally wrong with what happened while Fedyor is absolutely horrified. I think it's clear in s1 that Aleksandr tolerates Fedyor for Ivan's sake, but doesn't really trust or respect him, and definitely doesn't let him into his plans at the same level as he does with Ivan.
As of now, Fedyor and Ivan haven't seen each other in canon since 1x06, and we don't know if they're reunited in s2, offscreen, prior to any planned appearances in s3. (Please please I need this.) So anything after that is something that they haven't talked about or been in person to explain, though both of them might have heard rumors. We also know that prior to Simon and Julian's scheduling conflicts, this was basically what the showrunners planned to do with them: two lovers caught on different sides of the Grisha civil war, with Ivan remaining loyal to the Darkling and Fedyor joining Alina (as also happens in book 2, though they're not lovers there and have no relationship that we know of). I'm pretty sure that this would have involved one or both of them dying (as again, happens in Siege and Storm), so if they got saved by said scheduling snafus and we now get to explore their lives/story in a post-Darkling/war context, it depends on how much exploration we get of their feelings on what all went down. We might just move onto the next adventure and not necessarily focus as much on that, though I do imagine it has to come up. I would also love some scenes that are just about them, since they have thus far just appeared in context with other characters.
Anyway, yes: since we're not likely to get this in canon, or at least certainly not to the detail that I want, that's what I am exploring in the fic, and seeing how they deal with loving each other so much but being fundamentally at odds and angry with each other in a way they never have been before, and how that shapes them and their relationship going forward. So yes.
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lacefuneral · 1 year ago
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i need a 70k au fic where stede is a merman and he frequently spies on humans and collects trinkets a la the little mermaid
(long block of text of me ranting abt this below. i'm not going to write a full fic tho so if this inspires you, pls feel free to explore it and then tell me abt it. ok thanx)
in this universe, mermaids are regarded as being either a long-extinct species, or a myth altogether. the truth is that mermaids were hunted in droves for their pearl-tears, scales (jewelry), bones (tools), and meat. so mermaids learned to actively avoid humans to avoid detection while they slowly rebuilt their numbers. stede, ever the optimist, is convinced that Surely Not All Humans Are Like That, and We Probably Have Much In Common. as well as also regarding them as a sort of cryptid species. he knows humans are real, of course, but they are just as mythical to him as mermaids are to humans. so, despite being fundamentally against his culture, and being driven by the desire of exploration (and to escape the compulsory heterosexuality of his loveless, arranged marriage. but he does not know that he is gay yet)
stede is aware that humans are land-dwelling creatures that use ships as a means of transportation. and quickly learns from observation that some humans stay at sea longer than others as part of their vocation. as he cannot go on land, stede fantasizes about swimming along human ships. and of flooded compartments that he is able to "board" the ship through to look out of the portholes at the land (even though this is not possible). he wants to effectively be a sailor - help with navigation and scouting for seafood and danger (like submerged rocks that could cause a ship to sink). for the purpose of this AU, the crew is the same as the revenge crew in season 1. they were captained by a /different/ nobleman, who was killed, and ed took over the ship (and therefore the crew.) the ship /isn't/ the revenge. it's a different ship entirely.
while stede is swimming around, ironically, a wrecked ship, an incident occurs where ed is knocked off of his own ship during a storm stede finds him and takes him to shore (after an excruciating trek that involves him fighting the waves and holding ed's head above the water.) when he gets there he pushes him up onto a high rock, where the waves can't batter him.
stede is exhausted from the journey, so he returns to the water and finds a place nearby to rest. when the waves calm, he re-emerges to check on ed and make sure that he's safe.
when ed regains consciousness, he is fully convinced that he's hallucinating and that stede isn't real (despite the mermaid's insistence.) he stomps off and mutters something about hitting his head too on the rocks. naturally, his crew doesn't believe him either, and he assumes that he imagined the entire encounter. even though, with the circumstances, it would have been impossible for him to live. and there are mysterious claw marks on his arms (from stede's grip).
meanwhile, stede thinks that ed the most beautiful man he's ever seen (which he chalks up to "i think humans are interesting and this is the first one i've encountered up close like this") and is determined to meet him again.
the next evening he carefully spies around docks at the island that he dropped ed off on, but he doesn't see him. (ed pretty much immediately took off via dinghy and fast traveled to his ship, as per OFMD tradition. stede expected him to rest on land, unaware of ed's tenacity or the power struggles that occur on a pirate ship once a captain is assumed dead.)
stede mopes around the island for months, deciding that ed wasn't a sailor at all, but rather a Permanent Resident Of The Land. and that the ship he had been on was merely taking him to his home. stede had only expedited the process of his return. he keeps hoping that ed will find a reason to board a boat again.
instead, he's shocked to witness, one evening, ed EXITING a ship. he admires him from afar, and desperately wants to talk to him, but he finds that he's too nervous to do so. instead he waits for the ship to depart (after seeing ed reboard) and follows it around the carribean
ed spies him in the water several times, and begins to worry that he's hallucinating again. he doesn't tell the crew this time.
at one port, ed decides that he needs to take a break from the ship for a while to clear his head. seeing him alone on a beach, stede takes the opportunity to finally approach him. ed swears and shouts at him, telling him to fuck off.
hurt, stede drops the gift he brought for ed, leaving behind. the waves carry it to him anyway, and ed pockets an intricately carved shell.
stede spends the next several weeks living in ed's mind rent free, and he starts reading any book he can find on mermaids. most of them are complete and utter garbage, but he does manage to find a (mostly) accurate book that paints a picture of mermaid culture. there are illustrations in the book that resemble the item stede gave him - a token of diplomacy or friendship. he fusses with the shell frequently, like it's a worry stone. he begins having dreams about mermaids in general, and including a nightmare of the night he fell off of the ship. the morning, he realizes that he was drifting in and out of consciousness as stede carried him, and the sheer amount of effort that had to have been made to keep him alive. he feels absolutely horrible for yelling at stede.
unfortunately for ed, it is much harder for a human to track a mermaid than the other way around. but he has an idea. he begins carving small coins out of wood, and mimicking the design of the shell the best he can. he begins dropping them into the water periodically, leaving a breadcrumb trail for stede to follow.
some of these tokens end up in mermaid-populated areas, deeply confusing them, and causing debates as to whether or not humans (as an entire species) are aware of their presence. in which case, they would be in great danger and would need to migrate.
regardless, stede does find the tokens. and he begins to realize that they're a form of apology. he follows them until he comes across ed's ship. it's the middle of the night in calm waters, and he pops his head up. the smell of tobacco lets him know that he's not alone, and he very cautiously moves around the boat. eventually, he spies ed's pipe, and splashes the water to get his attention.
ed gestures back, but it's too dangerous for them to talk here. he does his best (with hand gestures) to communicate to stede to keep following, and to meet him the following night, when the ship is docked.
ed tells his crew that he's going to a brothel, and slips away to a secluded part of the island. making sure that he walks along the coast the entire way, allowing stede to follow him easier. when they finally make to the cove, ed apologizes profusely for his behavior. he explains that humans do not know that mermaids are real - that they do not remember them. he thanks stede for his selflessness. and he introduces himself not as blackbeard, infamous pirate, but as ed, a humble sailor. he doesn't want to startle stede by his trade - make stede assume that he's in danger of being sold for parts.
the entire time, stede's heart is beating out of his chest as he admires ed's face in the moonlight. (again, he assumes he's struck by seeing a human so close, rather than falling deeply in love)
stede eventually snaps out of it, introduces himself, and begins to ask questions about human society, easily trading facts with ed about his own society. when stede explains that what he is doing is essentially unheard of and that he'd rather actively put himself in danger than live a cushioned life back home, ed is flabbergasted. even moreso when stede reveals he has children.
"you gotta go back to them, man. it's a dangerous world out here. people are greedy, cut-throat."
in order to emphasize this, ed reveals that he's a pirate.
"months you've been looking for me - and you didn't even know! i'm a stranger. what if i'd wanted to hurt you? take your bones to get magical powers or whatever."
stede IS surprised by the pirate thing, but the bones comment disarms him and he snickers, insisting that mermaids do not have magical powers. besides, he says, ed seems too lovely to want to hurt him.
now it's time for ed to feel bashful. and he has to admit that stede is pretty beautiful... for a fish. has muscled arms and golden hair and kind eyes.
they make plans for future meetings. ed is very careful to schedule shore leave at different ports, different times of day, different frequencies, and different visit durations. he scouts land out ahead of time, trying to find places where it would be most comfortable for the two of them to talk. they exchange treasures with one another (ed's going into a secret trunk under his bed that has been chained to the floor and locked. stede's to various caches around the ocean floor that he gradually moves to a shipwreck that he calls his home.)
eventually, stede confesses that he wants to try and board ed's ship - meet his crew. he feels like a shameful secret. ed lashes out at him and essentially calls him an idiot - telling him that if other humans found out about him he'd surely end up getting killed and his entire species would too. he also doesn't understand why stede wants to talk to other humans. isn't ed enough? (forgetting, of course, that stede has exiled himself from his own society and is, therefore, entirely alone. ed is his only friend, and he doesn't get to see him very often. meanwhile, ed is constantly surrounded by people. stede is just a curiosity to him.)
stede stomps- er, flops - out. and returns to the sea without a goodbye. he doesn't show up to any of their next scheduled meetings. and soon, there are no meetings left. (why yes. he does go home at this time and realize he doesn't fit there anymore and finds out about doug. he doesn't fake his death this time around, though.)
heartbroken and upset, ed tells fang about mermaids. he shows him the history book, the treasures. he shows him the scars on his arm from determined claws. he explains how he tracked stede down. and he admits how devastated he feels without him around. he asks fang to help him modify the ship. to create a hatch at the bottom of the boat that can be opened. to tell the crew that it was for more easily deposing of bodies, and that's why it was so large. to form a ramp beside each stair ("so it's easier on my knees"). to place a huge ceramic tank on deck "to collect rain water during storms". and a bath large enough to accommodate two people ("because i fuckin deserve it.")
with the modifications made, ed is moping at the open hatch one day, looking into the ocean below. he watches various fish and turtles swim by. admires the coral. and then, suddenly, a face moves into view. both ed and stede shriek simultaneously, effectively jumpscared. after the shock wears off, ed places his hand in the water, indicating that there's no barrier between them
stede pops his head up and (badly) lies that he wasn't looking for him. they just happened to cross paths. ed insists that, while stede is there, he might as well hear him out. he explains the modifications done to the ship, and stede looks around him in wonder as it finally sinks in for him (lol) that he's in a FUNCTIONAL pirate ship right now. ed encourages him to climb up onto the floor (leaving the end of his tail in the water to remain moist), and then tells him that he's going to introduce him to fang.
the introduction goes well, and the two of them chatter for a long while. now that fang knows for certain that stede is real (and a decent person), he agrees to help ed explain stede to the rest of the crew, and try to incorporate him into ship life
the entire crew is fascinated by stede and gets along with him, except for izzy. for a lot of reasons. one, izzy is jealous that ed is spending time with him. two, izzy worries that stede could potentially be dangerous to them (in fact, he believes that stede is a siren, and he's actively trying to lure the crew to their deaths.) three, having a real live mermaid aboard is a great liability. if other pirates found out about stede, they would likely swarm the ship in an attempt to capture him. and four, izzy thinks that selling stede could be potentially lucrative for him.
izzy attempts to gain stede's trust (to learn details about him) and draft bargaining letters for various fences in the republic of pirates, but ed finds them in izzy's quarters. not wanting stede to be in danger, the entire crew votes for izzy to be executed (so as to not spread news of mermaid existence.) he is disposed of, ironically, through the hatch
stede navigates the ship in a modified wheelchair which allows him to go up and down the various ramps on the vessel. when he begins to dry out, he quickly freshens up at a washing basin, climbs into one of the two large tubs on board, or pours a bucket of water on himself (if he's outside on deck.) he spends most of his time onboard, but does occasionally go through the hatch to fully rest in the ocean, or when he's on scouting duty (collecting intel about other ships, seeking danger, looking for fish.)
during raids, stede is instructed to exit the ship entirely in the event of the ship being boarded.
and while he never had any expectation of this, he even gets to travel on land. he's only able to do so for very brief periods, but with a shirt on his torso, a blanket over his tail, a hat over his fin-like ears, and pair of gloves on each webbed hand, humans are yet to notice. anyone that sees his sharp teeth assume that they're a fake set (like buttons')
ed and stede are horribly smitten with each other, and it isn't long after stede's adapted to amphibious life that they start a relationship. stede audibly says "ohhhhhhhhh........... i get it now. i like men." after ed kisses him for the first time, something that makes both of them crack up.
they do fuck nasty!
and get married later on yay!
and eventually ed retires somewhere remote and has an amphibious home commissioned that literally has water running through the entire building (using ancient technology as a basis). like roman, turkish. and even a bed that allows ed to sleep dry and stede to sleep wet and a place for their hands to meet and hold while they sleep. smiles
um anyway ya this has been my gay fish story which is also a metaphor for physical disability and how accommodations can make your life better and they aren't bad. ed is literally disabled but didn't think to get ramps until he was doing it for someone else. and stede's constant need for water feels very chronic illness to me. like he needs a lot of meds, he needs to rest a lot, he needs a lot of tools to help him out.
anyway i know i rambled a lot here but i don't really. Do full stories. so if anyone thinks this is cool u can go ahead
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mintoxhitsuji · 6 months ago
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Hikari Chalkia is a 26 year old, 200 cm tall angel. She goes by she/her and is heterosexual.
Hikari is very strong-willed and confident, she knows what she wants and will do anything to get her way. She is very accepting of almost everyone who didn‘t do any harm, but she got a bone to pick with demons. The hatred against them does not come from nowhere, since she was possessed by one before. This possession ruined her relationship with her first boyfriend and ever since she feels unreasonably angry when she feels their presence. Hikari rarely shows her weak side but if she does she is very vulnerable.
This angel is working as an occupational therapist, just like her mother. After she found Karasu one day, she knew she had someone special on her hand. She was the one who decided to take him with her, giving him a place to sleep and teach him Japanese. She quite quickly fell in love with him and after some time they moved into their own flat. They are a couple for 6 years now. Karasu and Hikari are good friends with Saiko and partially Yume. At least Karasu is, Hikari on the other hand can feel the demon inside Yume and is thus rather cold towards him from the outside. But in the inside she wants to help him. When she first met Katsuro, she didn‘t give him much attention until the conscience demons Mauryce and Elyas showed up.
Hikari enjoys archery a lot, but she is very sporty in general. She often goes for runs, swims often or goes for flights. She feels serene when she is in the sky and sees all of the city from above. Together with Karasu, they try to figure out where the cornix tenebrae came from.
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godbarks · 3 months ago
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NAMED AGUSTIN "PREACH" CASTILLO. KNOWN AS PREACH, DETECTIVE. ZODIAC SAGITTARIUS. DOB DECEMBER 21ST, FORTY1 YRS OLD. PLACE OF BIRTH LAFOURCHE, LOUSIANA. GENDER CIS MAN. PRONOUNS HE/HIM. ORIENTATION HETEROSEXUAL. OCCUPATION DETECTIVE. FACECLAIM SANTIAGO CABRERA.
INSPIRED BY PRESTON TEAGARDIN ( THE DEVIL ALL THE TIME ), JESSE CUSTER ( PREACHER ), RUSTIN COHLE ( TRUE DETECTIVE ), JOHN PRUITT ( MIDNIGHT MASS ), RAYLAN GIVENS ( JUSTIFIED )
HEIGHT SIX FOOT ONE. HAIR CASUALLY TOUSLED, SILVER FOX IN THE MAKING. EYES DARK BROWN, SIMMERING. SCENT SPICE FORWARD WITH NOTES OF CEDAR & MARLBORO RED. LANGUAGES CHILEAN SPANISH, ENGLISH, FRENCH. POSITIVE TRAITS CEREBRAL, INTUITIVE, DEVOUT. NEGATIVE TRAITS OBSESSIVE, DELUSORY, ELUSIVE.
ENTER, THE WHISKEY PROPHET.
biography.
you’ve always known how this ends.   there’s a child,   and there’s a wolf—one will always devour the other; one is dead,   and the other is the worst kind of alive.   you came crawling out of the bayou,   dredged from the muck,   born to nothing but sin.   a warrant was always hanging over your pa's head,   or a leasing notice nailed to the door of your mama's sagging shack,   the one she loved too much.   you were raised in a place where the grass never grew upright,   and neither did you.   always reaching,   always wanting,   just a little too close to that line between need and hunger.
you've been a maw since the cradle, devouring everything around you.   you took it all from your mother,   including the man she claimed was your father—though he was never more than a butcher with a god complex,   wielding the knife as his god.   he carved you into a twisted reflection of himself.   even as a child,   violence seeped from your bones.   unable to bring him down,   you turned your sharp edge on a world that hadn’t wronged you,   yet bore the brunt of your wrath.
the swamp taught you its cruel lessons.   it swallowed the forsaken and the damned,   and you made yourself part of its dark embrace—something wild and ravenous that sprawled across all it touched.   your younger brother was the first to witness the change,   seeing you slip away before you even knew it.   from there,   it all became a blur of sirens,   badges,   and a life built on half-truths and hollow confessions,   leaving you a ghostly patchwork of sin and shadow.
you were born again in the fire,   a cover-up that turned to something wild.   it was supposed to be simple—burn the evidence,   bury your ghosts—but those flames had a hunger of their own.   you struck the match knowing what you’d lose,   but when the blaze spread,   it didn’t stop with the past.   it took everything,   left you standing in the ash of all you'd tried to hide.
they called it an accident,   said it was faulty wiring or an drunken lapse of judgement.   but you knew.   the fire didn’t just burn—it stripped you down,   peeled back the skin until you were nothing but bone and sin,   raw as the day you were born.   they sent you to a new town,   told you to start over,   but you carried the flames inside you,   always burning,   always waiting.
now,   everything you touch feels like it could go up in smoke.   you’re not just running from your sins anymore—you’ve made a home in them.   that fire’s in your blood,   waiting for the next match to light.   waiting for you to burn again.
headcanons.
has been in town for just about a year now. hasn't been home since but his call logs are almost exclusively between greylocke and louisiana. tells most folks that he's from new orleans for the very slight thrill of averting the truth.
raised on the side of louisiana that never recovered from the great migration to the inner city; will never fully adjust to the big city lights & sounds because of it.
his current apartment is the first place that he's lived in independently ( that wasn't a shoddy motel or his backseat ) in a WHILE and is very much a reflection of such: he doesn't have curtains, has far too many bottles of guinness in the fridge, BUTTTT the living room is sensibly decorated.
drinks to remember instead of forgetting. the bottom of a bottle tends to bring him clarity. bro is hardly beating the alcoholic allegations.
only became a lawman back in nola for the kudos, esp familially. his dad was on the other side of the law so all the more reason to prove the fucker wrong.
the fire seriously injured his then-partner & subsequently preach was faced with temporary leave for psychological evaluation as well as an unexpected transfer that has since kept him in greylocke.
wants to be a good cop but is rlly the bad cop. 100% raylan givens coded; questionable ethics & slightly less questionable methods.
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lascidarkblueuniverse · 10 months ago
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My Adventure Time Self Insert/Persona (Adventuresona), Isrrael The Unknown! by isrrael120
Hello Well, I was looking through my old notebooks from high school and I found an old drawing of some kind of old Adventure Time Self Insert drawing that I did and I remembered that I did it after watching the end of the first season, so I basically redrawn it and created a kind of bio with the vague memories I have about it, well this time it is in the universe of “Adventure Time with Finn and Jake” or “Adventure Time” for short!!!!
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Name: Isrrael The Unknown
Nicknames: Isrrael, Issa, Wet Dog, Creature, Abomination, Weird Werewolf, Thing, Unknown Entity, New Species
Sex: Male
Age: Unknown
Physical Age: 15 - 21
Species: Unknown
Occupation: Adventurer And Hunter
Place of Origin: Unknown
Current Residence: In An Unknown Place In A Forest Of Trees
Height: 5′ 6″ - 5’ 11"
Weight: 200 lbs
Relationships:
Family: Unnamed mother, Unnamed father
Friends: Finn, Jake, BMO, Princess Bubblegum, Lady Rainicorn, Marceline, Ice King etc.
Love Interests: None
Enemies: The Lich etc.
Neutral: None
Sexual Orientation: Heterosexual
Personality and Character Traits: Isrrael often describes himself as unpredictable because of his tendency to suddenly change his emotions, such as being excited about fighting and then getting very nervous about forgetting a person he had an important meeting with for one simple reason, In general, he is a calm person at first glance, although there are moments where he becomes the opposite of his calm nature, in addition to being distant at times with everyone, Depending on the situation (including small and insignificant things) he becomes very nervous, He usually looks like a funny person although his sense of humor is quite simple in reality, He is usually quiet or not very talkative, He is a sentimental person and he always tries to do things right with everyone and if he doesn't it affects his mind a lot, He is curious by nature, he usually tries to search and understand everything although it brings him problems sometimes, He has traits of being intelligent even though he doesn't understand very advanced things, He is clumsy sometimes and apologizes a lot when he screws up, He is insecure about himself and gets sad easily because of that, He likes to spend long periods of time alone!
Powers and Abilities:
Wolf Physiology/Werewolf Physiology: He possesses the traits, attributes, characteristics and/or abilities of wolves, achieving this by completely or partially transforming into wolves, choosing to imitate certain aspects of them or simply already being a wolf in the first place/He possesses the traits, attributes and/or abilities of, transforming into, or being/is a werewolf, a human or humanoid being with the ability to transform into a wolf or an anthropomorphic wolf-like creature, he acquires the traits of werewolves, the most obvious being the ability to transform into a wolf with the natural characteristics inherent to both wolves and humans, including senses, stamina, agility, etc!
Earth Manipulation: He can create, shape and manipulate earth and “earthen” elements including most solid objects, specifically all minerals and mineral compositions regardless of their state (mountain, boulder, sand or dust), dirt, soil, etc!
Mana Manipulation: He can create, shape, and manipulate mana, a magical form of life energy. He is also a source of impersonal energy that is both external and internal, existing in people, places, and objects, and that the user can transmute into magical powers that produce outstanding results in both practice and combat!
Healing: He can heal himself and restore biotic organisms to their optimal health, healing damaged or withered organisms, wounds, broken bones, low vitality and disease/poisoning, he can potentially heal any form of bodily damage!
Lunar Empowerment: He becomes stronger, faster, more durable, etc. when he comes into contact with the moon, moonlight, or lunar energy/substance, unlocking affinity-related abilities and enhancing his existing powers, depending on the lunar cycle of the moment (he can't use his powers on a new moon and is very powerful on a full moon)! +Powers/Abilities Unlocked Under Full Moon: *Lunar Energy Manipulation: He can create, shape and manipulate lunar energy! *Illusion Manipulation: He can manipulate illusions/hallucinations, making targets see, hear, touch, smell or taste things differently than they really are! *Power Echo: He can automatically replicate/reflect every attack used against him, where every attack on a target is instantly and automatically returned in equal measure to the attacker! *Extreme Temperature Resistance: He can survive a wide variety of hot/warm and cold/low temperatures without discomfort!
Skills and Hobbies: Hunt, Drawing, Playing Video Games, Surfing, Playing Guitar, Read Books, Waterbody, Learning New Magic Arts, Astronomy
Basic Backstory (Main): Isrrael The Unknown Is An Adventurer And Hunter From The Land Of Ooo, Of An Unknown Origin And With Vague Memories Of A Different Life He Goes On Many Adventures Alone Or Accompanied, He Is A Great Beast Hunter, He Likes To Read Books And Spend Hours In Bodies Of Water Such As Lakes, Rivers, Seas And Etc!
Basic Backstory (Others Stories And AUs): None
Complete Biography (Main): +During The Series(Season 1): He originally appears as an elusive new species of werewolf, the only thing we can get of him are photos of shadows with the simple characteristics of a wolf, his ears and tail, many locals began to get scared when he began to approach them during The nights then ask Finn and Jake for help to get rid of him, during a search they meet Isrrael who was actually a 15 year old teenager with the same wolf characteristics said by the locals and he only greets while eating a piece of raw meat. lying near a lake, during a chat with Finn and Jake they realize that this boy has a pretty relaxed personality although he doesn't mention that he doesn't remember how he got to this place to begin with, so Finn mentions the issue of the locals so that Israel I simply say that he did it because the animals he hunted tried to hide near them, indicating that he basically behaved like a wild animal and he says that he has been living that way for weeks, although it seems to be his way of life, he couldn't continue scaring everyone so Finn and Jake try to convince him to show up with the locals to avoid more problems but at first Isrrael didn't want to do it but in the end he does when he finally shows up the locals themselves seemed upset making Isrrael ask Finn in a whisper if he could be buried alive but Finn clearly denies that idea so Isrrael thinks of something else so he tells the locals that he could help them with their daily activities for a while, so Isrrael does it for the next day and in the end he manages to talk to the locals that he was good and making him feel good then he goes to Finn and Jake to thank them for talking him into doing it and then he sees a squirrel with two suitcases and chases it through the forest followed by Finn and Jake!
Complete Biography (Others Stories And AUs): None
Additional Information: +He Acts Like a Dog And/Or Wolf Sometimes! +Everyone in the Land of Ooo Thinks He's Some Kind of Werewolf! +He Likes To Try New Things That He Sees! +He Really Likes Fighting And Violence Because Of His Aggressive and Analytical Way of Fighting! +Sometimes He Looks Like He Has Depression Although He Doesn't See It As Such! +He Sometimes Prefers To Be Alone With His Thoughts! +He Sometimes Has Flashbacks To A Different Life! +He Is A Surfer And Swimmer!
Weapons and Equipment: Various Swords And Other Weapons!
Disguises and Other Personalities: The Shadow Wolf: It used to be how they knew him at the beginning because he used to be fast with what he did, he was a shadow with werewolf characteristics the only thing that was known about him! The Secret Wizard: A Costume That He Uses To Enter The Wizard City, It Consists Of A Large Night Blue Tunic With A Large Moon Drawn In The Center!
Likes: Draw, Water, Magic, Music, Food, Bread
Dislikes: Stress, Soup, Hard Things
Quotes: “Oh hello you two, what do you want?” “It's Hunter Time!” “A good lake to relax!” “Seriously, take a bath, you smell like death!” “sorry for being late, I had a fight!” “you want what thing?” “Hey if I want to fight I will and if I don't I won't I won't!” “Delicious, fresh meat!” “I'm always ready to be violent!” “I like parties like everyone!” “Hey, I can bury everyone alive, right?” “Hey, just because I behave like a wild animal sometimes doesn't mean I can't be civilized!” “I don't know how I got here in the first place!” “I'm a little sad about what happened!” “Hey don't talk to me that way now!” “very good, I don't know what to say now!” “I'm kind of crazy if I'm honest but I'm fine!” “Wait I have a date?” “this should be easy!” “Well I eat raw meat, I say it's common for me!” “Hey, I bathe frequently!” “These memories are confusing!”
Relationship Chart/List: Closed None
Questions: Closed
Roleplays: Closed
Dares: Closed
Headcanons: Closed
Notes: -When I drew him for the first time I was 16 years old and his personality is based on mine at that age! -A lot of what I write is based on memories of seeing AT OC/Self Inserts ideas on the internet at that time! -Links Full: Tumblr, Twitter, Pixiv, Instagram and Deviantart
Isrrael The Unknown (Adventure Time Sona) - Me Art - Me Adventure Time © Pendleton Ward/Cartoon Network
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I have a bone to pick and people are not going to like it.
There is a Dr by the name of Nicholas Groth. He writes books on the psychology of rapists, more often specifically child rapists.
I've been looking for information on him for a decent chunk of time. I can't find a picture of him, I can't find who he is married too, nothing. Now the picture isn't important but the fact that he's supposedly been alive since 1937 would make him 86. And not one photo. Which I personally find suspicious. What's more, not only can I not find a picture of him, but his study on child predators has this weird problem as seen below.
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So a few things about this piece lacking context. I've studied psychology for around 12-14 years now. Off and on. Partly out of general interest and partly to take some of my own power back.
And the above things here bother me.
Suppose for a second that the first part of the line, "They see the boy as a projected representation of themselves". Ok. So let's assume that for a moment. This would imply, that rather than abusing the child, that the predator is abusing themselves. However, he goes on to state that "-and therefore find themselves more comfortable (especially sexually) in the company of children..." Which would imply they view themselves as a child. These two things are mutually exclusive in most cases because in order to view someone as you while viewing yourself as them, takes a really stupid level of disassociation. Or being extremely autistic.
The fact that Groth here obfuscates the possibility that there are predators that are gay. And the manner in which he does this is by more or less saying that, "...molesters see themselves in their victims, but would not be attracted to adult males."
So full stop. Is Dr. Groth gay? Why would I ask this question. Well the obvious point here would be a conflict of interest in these studies in regards to sexuality of child molesters. But there's more contradiction here. And this is a clear thing that is not compatible when you are correct in your usage of language.
"See yourself in their victims" and "See the boy as a projected representation" are not the same thing. The may sound the same. But a person doing a research paper as a Dr. does not make this mistake.
When you see yourself IN the victim it implies that you see similarities between you and the victim.
However, when you see yourself projected as a representation, you are more or less seeing yourself AS the victim you intend to abuse.
No matter how subtle this difference is there IS one and it's not semantic. It's a meaningful difference. So the reason I call this out is because his research is a bit all over the place when it comes to the sexuality of predators. Reason being. He makes the claim that, "These men are heterosexual in their everyday lives, but assault kids as a form to take power." And while one part of that is true, there's more to it.
If you view yourself as a child or find yourself (more comfortable with kids sexually) psychologically speaking, if it's a man who targets only little boys, what does that imply? Well if we are answering honestly it could be a number of things. The man could be a bisexual but was never fully comfortable with sex as an adult, and thus forth upon having access to children, decided to live out the desires he had.
Also another interesting piece of information. Predators are often victims themselves. Sometimes they grow and aversion to the sex that victimized them, sometimes they don't. And when it's person of the same sex that does it to you. What tends to happen is that you run from it. Sometimes a lot harder than if it was someone of the opposite sex. Thing is if you look into it closely, one of the things that you find is that gay men who stay closeted for a very long time will do their best to come across as straight. Some men even have wives and kids along the way while not being sexually into women in that way. Why? Because they force themselves to be "Straight".
One of the largest reasons why this is a phenomenon is because they are trying to deny feeling that made them feel powerless. Which is to say, they as themselves when they got stunted mentally, emotionally, etc is a closer version of the real them. And YES it's horrific. To be attracted to kids in that way. However, after looking at all this research and not being able to find a shred of decent info on this Dr. I'm having doubts about the findings. Mostly because they are contrary to those I've found, and those of several of my friends in the field. Not everything is wrong mind you. However, there seems to be a number of things that don't properly add up.
And before anyone gets the idea that I'm calling all LGBT people or otherwise, all "Predators", I am not. However, As I've stated before. when a male predator goes out of his way to target only little boys, that in and of itself is a homosexual act. The man may well be a bisexual. But the age of the person involved does not change the sex they are. However, yes there are cases where there are predators that target both boys and girls. And if they view themselves as a child, they "as that child" are a bisexual. Even though they are also a predator.
And look. Anyone can be a predator no matter their orientation. But understand me when I say this. This researcher seems to be a fucking phantom. And given the subject matter they have produced, I don't like that. Several conclusions seemed rushed and don't fully add up.
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