#if that relationship occurred it would be grooming to hell and back

[mosscreeper-ao3]

The block button isn’t enough. I need a stronger way to repel Sheith content from ever violating my eyeballs again.

[strawwritesfic]

Joel x Female!Amputee!Reader: (Don't) Hold Your Breath [Chapter 1]

Summary: You've made a lot of monumental mistakes in your life. Cutting your arm off isn't even at the top of the list. Now you're about to learn a lot of life lessons at the hands of your savior and her brute of a guardian--and they're not about to let you learn them the easy way either.

Challenge: "#32 in His Rulebook" by Edible Heart Monster on Lunaescence Archives

Rating/Warnings/Tags: M (post-The Last of Us; excessive swearing; sexual references; violence against children; infected children; references to abortion; references to cannibalism; references to starvation; references to riots; implied domestic abuse; implied grooming; implied sexual relationship between an adult and a minor; death of a parent; violence; gore; blood; gun use; ableism; amputee!Reader; enemies to lovers; not canon compliant)

Pairings: Joel/Female!Reader; Tommy/Maria; Reader/Male!OC; Ellie & Reader; Ellie & Joel; Ellie & Maria & Tommy

Tag List: @imaginesfire

Master List (with important note!)

Rule #1: Shut up. The enemy might hear you.

By the time you woke up, the rest of them had left—quite a while ago, you’d hazard a guess. It had definitely been nighttime when you’d passed out on that pile of dirty rags. Load of shitty freeloaders. It didn’t take a genius to realize they’d taken all the food with them, too. In the hazy light filtering through the trees outside your dilapidated hideout, you could see far enough to know that much.

You were far too woozy to try moving, but your brain didn’t catch onto that. Your teeth ground into each other as you reached desperately around the immediate area in an attempt to find a pistol. If those fuckers had taken your weapons as well, you were going to track them down and get your things back the hard way. You’d given practically everything you had to get that meat back there.

Everything, it occurred to you, including the arm you were using to try and find your gun. Shit. You struggled into a seated position, panting as you lifted the remaining stump to get a good look at things. Blood seeped crimson through the bandages that made up most of your desperately-made tourniquet. Of course, those shitheads couldn’t be bothered to do it up better for you before you ran out. At least that explained your extreme lightheadedness.

Something next to your makeshift bed gleamed, catching your eye. You scooped it up with your still-existing hand. Thank god. It was a pistol. At least they had left you that much, and maybe a little more. A torn fragment of paper lay beneath it. The reward for your efforts was nothing but a hastily scribbled note about not sticking around until you got infected. As though you hadn’t cut off your own fucking arm as soon as that bastard runner got you!

But then you supposed you would have done the same thing. Hell, you would have shot the moron that thought amputation was the answer. So in addition to being a bunch of jackasses, your old group was also apparently made up entirely of morons, leaving you and letting you live. You tossed the paper lethargically into the corner. Well, you’d been right. If you were going to become infected, you already would have got there.

Now remained the problem of how the fuck you were supposed to survive with a single arm, and your nondominant hand at that.

“Hey, Joel! I’m gonna check over here, all right? There’re tracks leading away. Maybe some hunters left us something good.”

A whoosh of nausea filled your stomach. Before you could do so much as throw the rags over you in a sorry attempt at hiding, the door to your tiny shack in the middle of buttfuck nowhere drifted gently open. With you in the state you were in, you could hardly get up and strangle the intruder. There was nothing to do but freeze and hope she left.

But the door creaked open farther still, and into your hovel stepped a girl you thought must have been in her early teens. Her green eyes wandered over the remains of whatever people had lived there twenty-something years ago, but clearly saw nothing interesting until they landed on you.

You wasted no time in lifting your pistol, fat load of good it would do you. Your arm trembled simply at lifting the weapon; there was no question that you wouldn’t have the strength to actually fire—and that was if you even had any bullets remaining from the firefight the night before.

“Shit,” the girl yelped, leaping back toward the door. You winced at your continued effort; you could feel more blood rushing to the sight of your missing limb. This must have made you look more pathetic than threatening, because the girl crept forward and eyed you with something akin to wonder. “Hey, are you okay?”

You just snorted in response, but that didn’t seem to make you a more formidable opponent. The girl bent down next to you to get a closer look, as though you were some interesting sideshow she hadn’t seen advertised.

“Oh, man, you’re really bleeding,” she said.

“Get—” Your words got caught in your throat. You screwed up your eyes before trying again: “Get. Out.”

“I—”

“Get out or I’ll shoot you, you little bitch.”

Her eyes narrowed in response. Meanwhile, your eyes caught the pistol gripped loosely in one of her hands. Shit. If it came to actually shooting, she’d slaughter you, and then what would you have cut your damn arm off for? Getting killed by a kid seemed laughable compared to being torn up by infected.

“I doubt you can aim properly in your condition,” she said calmly.

“Try me,” you spat.

“Hey, why don’t you try showing a little respect?”

“Respect me, you—”

The sharp click of rifle interrupted your pissing contest with the twerp. She looked up at once, but you took several seconds longer to get your gaze up to the face of the newcomer.

“Do you want to try dropping that gun, or do you want me to make it so you don’t need it anymore?” he asked.

Even if you weren’t near-dead, you would have been intimidated by the girl’s bodyguard. He was enormous, grizzled, and wearing an expression that quite clearly told you the “near” part of that might not last much longer. You doubted that dropping your pistol would net you your life, but just then your hand gave such a tremendous shudder that the weapon slipped from your fingers and fell to the ground anyway. Sure enough, the gun pointed at your head didn’t budge an inch.

“Joel,” said the girl.

“What, kid?” he said angrily without taking his eyes off you. In response, she got to her feet and lifted her hands in some strange attempt to pacify him. He looked at her only for a moment before rolling his eyes and returning to your stare down.

“Joel,” the girl said again. “She’s hurt.”

“And what does that matter?”

“She obviously wasn’t going to shoot me!” Suddenly, the calming note in the girl’s voice was gone. Her tone flared up like a rocket, though that didn’t seem to have much of an effect on Joel. “So put the gun down!”

“Ellie—”

“Just do it!”

At last, he stopped watching you to take up glaring at Ellie in your stead. She scowled up at him for half a minute, but didn’t wait for him to do as she said. With a sound of great annoyance, she tore her gaze away and threw herself down at your side. After a moment of casting about for something, she looked down at her shirt, pulled a pocket knife from one of her pockets, and proceeded to slice a long strip of fabric from her clothes.

“Kid, what are you doing?” Joel asked impatiently.

She scowled up at him as she proceeded to wrap the fabric tightly around your stump. "Helping.”

Joel groaned and jammed his rifle back into the pack on his back. “And what good is that supposed to do her?”

It was exceedingly frustrating being spoken about as though you weren’t there, but the energy you had expended on snapping at Ellie was all that you had left. You slumped back against the wood wall of the shack and stared blearily between the two of them. Why they weren’t gunning you down, you had no idea.

“It’ll last longer than the sucky tourniquet she’s got now,” Ellie said.

“So?”

“So it’ll get her back to Jackson!”

“Get her back to—” Joel spluttered. Then he just paused before saying flatly, “You are not taking her home with us.”

“Yes, I am.”

“Are you insane? You know how she lost an arm? Probably got bit.”

“Looks like she acted quickly to me. Hey.” Ellie nudged you, and then nudged you much harder a second time when you didn’t react. “Hey, you. When did you get bit?”

“Huh?” you asked. You could have sworn you were paying attention, but suddenly the question had slipped your mind.

Ellie’s eyebrows lifted, and she spoke much more slowly to say, "When did you get bit?”

“L-Last night,” you answered, closing your eyes with pain as she finished tying the tourniquet. “Hours ago.”

“See?” Ellie asked lightly as she stood. “She’s fine.”

“Kid, you can’t be the savior to every goddamn straggler we run into.”

Her eyebrows furrowed as Ellie opened her mouth to reply. She must have thought better of what she was going to say, though, because she shrugged and adjusted her pack before trying again, “You owe me. And I owe it to the world.”

“Kid—”

“Not now, Joel.” She spun back toward you. “Do you think you can walk? We can’t really make a stretcher. I guess Joel could carry you.”

“Like hell I’m carrying her. This is your project.”

“Fine,” Ellie snapped. “Then you can lean me. Just so long as you can walk a bit.”

“You’re overestimating your own strength again.”

“If you aren’t going to offer a solution, then shut your trap. Can you walk?” she asked you again.

The old you would have told her to fuck off and take her old man with her. You could handle it on your own. This time, though, you were pretty sure you couldn’t. You didn’t have food; you only had a single magazine in your pistol; and you were significantly down on your ability to protect yourself.

“We’ve got a settlement, a really cool place, totally self-governed. You can come with us.”

“You really think Maria and Tommy are just going to let us waltz in the front gate with some woman that’s probably gonna turn at any minute?” Joel asked.

“She’s not infected. Besides, they’ll let me waltz in the front gate with her. After all, I’m their delightful little niece.”

“You are not their niece,” Joel said.

“Yeah, yeah.”

She must have heard that a lot, because Ellie didn’t appeared bothered by that statement. Ducking slightly, she grasped your shoulders and, ignoring your tensing, heaved you to your feet. It took several minutes. You didn’t have the strength to help her—nor, really, did you have the desire to. Survival instinct was telling you to get away from these two as quick as you could. Unfortunately, your body was not up to those instructions, and Ellie got you standing soon enough. She even had you taking several steps toward the exit.

“You wanna be at least some help and open the door?” Ellie asked Joel.

Although he didn’t look pleased about it, Joel made to open the door. His large fingers had only just wrapped around the knob when a horribly familiar clicking noise issued from somewhere outside. Each person in the room froze, you even more so than you had been. A second later, and that clicking was answered by another, only slightly more distant.

Joel reached for his gun. Whatever Ellie planned to do, you didn’t intend to find out. Summoning up the last vestiges of your strength, you tore yourself free of her hold. Without any energy left to keep yourself upright, you fell back onto the floor.

Your pistol sat several feet away, entirely useless to you. You began to thrash wildly on the floor, desperate to get back to it. An inability to shoot you might have had, but you weren’t going to go down without a fight. Sounds of fear, normally easy to quash, began to claw their way out of your throat as you moved.

Joel’s boot smashed down mere inches from your fingers. Your head snapped upward to see him glowering down at you, his rifle aimed once more at your head.

“Shut the fuck up,” he hissed. “They can hear you.”

“I know what clickers are!” you panted.

What the fuck was Joel on, thinking he had to explain infected to you? You’d been surviving just as long as he had! If you weren’t so exhausted by your escape attempt, you would have shown him whatfor. As it was, you could only lay there in a heap, breathing heavily, and watch as he maneuvered toward one of the broken windows. Ellie followed suit, though she paused to smirk at you once she was stationed, and held a finger to her lips.

Of all the shitty people to land yourself with. Your last group might have been stupid, but at least they weren’t sarcastic teenagers.

Joel and Ellie both looked out, never relaxing, even when the time between each click was longer than the last. Sweat broke out across the back of your neck. The three of you were trapped there, in that shitty shack, with no food and you probably bleeding to death. If either of them shot a clicker, it would bring every single infected in the vicinity right to your door—and after the hunt last night, you knew there were quite a few infected in the vicinity.

“As far as I can tell, there’s only two,” Joel whispered, though even that much was risky. “You stay here.”

Ellie nodded. With an impressively silent tread for a man so large and carrying so much weaponry, Joel moved across the room, opened the door, and slipped out into the growing night. A few more clicks sounded, but after that, everything went completely quiet.

“Did you get them?” Ellie whispered a few minutes later.

You started, having not even realized that Joel had returned. In fact, he was right above you, and before you could react, he hefted you into the air and threw your arms around his shoulders.

“Yeah,” he growled. “Let’s get going before more show up. Dragging her along definitely isn’t going to make things easy.”

“I know how to be quiet,” you murmured, too worn-out for much more. Maybe it would have been better if he just dropped you there to be turned. The stress you had from dealing with those two for just an hour or two seemed to be draining you more than the amputation.

“Good.” He did not sound as though he believed you. “Because if you pull another stunt like that, I’m dumping you in a nest of clickers and leaving you there.”

Cool night air hit your face at last. Although you were fading quickly, you were aware enough to hear Ellie’s quick, quiet footsteps as she caught up to you.

“Don’t worry,” she said, with a smile that you suspected was supposed to be reassuring. “Joel treats everyone like that. You’ll grow on him.”

“Fantastic,” you said hoarsely.

Joel jostling you harder than necessary was the last thing you remembered from that night.

[beifong-brainrot]

(Continuing with the Dark Avatar Bolin idea) Imagine Korra being unnaturally harsh and rude to Bolin without even realizing it. And that will only escalate the relationship between Mack and Korra.

Bolin: Just breathing Korra with Raava inside her: Can you shut the hell up? Korra: Why the hell did I say that?

And Season 2, ohhh… Unalag will be pestering Bolin in every way, and dark spirits are following him all the time. And the dark spirits don't attack Bolin, and Team Avatar starts to suspect something. Tenzin senses very negative energy from Bolin, Jinora too, and Bolin starts to feel worse and worse until… a harmonious rapprochement occurs. Bolin suddenly becomes a dark avatar and screams in pain and fear, and he starts getting angry at everyone (especially Korra, because she should have known)

(Imagine this as the scene from MK when Mei is covered in the aura of the fire of samadhi) https://youtube.com/clip/UgkxFliqFGwSs_lSmbsmFnUWwJqYFIGT3ZiP?si=7cijG9k729M8wyKB

2. Avatar Bolin (with Raava) I imagine the scene when Bolin finds out he is the Avatar: 8-year-old Mako tries to create flame, he hears "Mako, look!" and he sees how his little brother created flame without hurting himself. "I can bend fire too!" 6-year-old Bolin shouts happily, while Mako looks at him in horror, his little brother… the Avatar!

Many years later

The newspapers write that "the Avatar is missing!" and the White Lotus actively searches for the Avatar but to no avail. During one of the pro-bender fights, Bolin finds himself cornered and he accidentally blows away his opponents from a reflex, the audience is shocked, Mako is very scared and worried.

NOT WAY! THERE'S THE AVATAR, AND HE JUST BLOWN THEM AWAY LIKE PEBBLES!

The sentries who were listening to the match are shocked, and (most likely) Korra exclaims "You're all going to the pro-bender arena!" (I think Korra and Tenzin will switch roles in a sense, Korra will be Bolin's teacher because he can't bend water)

3. The scene where Avatar!Bolin finally bends water.

Seeing his brother about to be stripped of his bending, he stretches out his arms screaming "NO"Amon stops, he twitches and groans.

Mako can control his body again, but that means… Bolin bends water, but not water… but blood.

Bolin backs away in shock looking at his hands, but Amon gets up and Bolin panics, bloodbending throws Amon through the wall and he breaks through it, and falls into the water.

Sorry if there is too much text.

I don't mind the long asks, hun, sorry for not responding earlier, but I have had a few busy days lol.

1. Bolin as the Dark Avatar

Well, the concept of there being a "dormant" Dark Avatar cycle that hasn't manifested due to Vaatu's imprisonment is an interesting concept. The idea that the Raava Avatar like Korra and heavily spiritual people like Jinora can sense this energy but don't exactly understand it could make for some juicy drama.

I wonder if Unalaq would be able to recognise Bolin for having the capability kf being a vessel for Vaatu. Perhaps he'd try to subtly groom Bolin into this role, or isolate him from thr Krew to be ablw to influence him more lol.

It could make Bolin and Eska's relationship more interesting too, perhaps instead of being an abusive girlfriend, she is ordered by Unalaq to keep an eye on Bolin.

Plus, this could recontextualise Vaatu in an interesting way. Vaatu escaping his tree prison and immediately "hiding" within Bolin makes hin seem more like a wounded animal than a big bad villain. Which is an interesting take because I've always found sympathetic interpretations of Vaatu very interesting.

But Vaatu's vessel, in this case Bolin would probably become flooded by his chaotic and 'dark' energy, which would be pretty painful, I imagine. Especially that Bolin has been shown to struggle with normal negative emotions. I can totally see him lashing out at people, especially Korra, whom he percieves as having "failed" him.

2. Regular Avatar Bolin

Honestly one of my favourite parts of an Avatar Bolin AU is actually that fire is the element after Earth in the cycle and therefore the element Bolin would learn firebending second.

Just imagine baby Avatar Bolin learning firebending alongside/from Mako ugh...

Im very curious of what people would think and how the world would operate with a "missing Avatar". And I can yotally see Mako trying to keep Bolin hidden from the world, not wanting them to be seperated and also knowing that as the Avatar Bolin would be often put in danger.

Bolin revealing himself during a probending match does make sense. I can completely see that happening in a moment of desperation or smth.

I also like thinking about what Korra would be like if she weren't, you know, the Avatar. Usually in this type of AU, I like to imagine her as Katara's apprentice, and perhaps not a White Lotus operative herself, but defined someone who works with them, particularly when it comes to looking for the Avatar. I think she'd be a little less socially awkward since she didn't grow up on a compound which is nice because she deserves nice things.

Her being Bolin's waterbending teeacher is really cute because either they'd get along swell and be immediate besties, or she'd make him cry. No inbetween.

3. Bolin waterbending

Oooh, that is very interesting and symbolic. Not sure how it would work lorewise, since bloodbending is very specialised and most people can only do it on the full moon, but ugh the juicyness of the scene...

[separatist-apologist]

Which of the bg3 origin character ships/dynamics do you enjoy the most? Or if you have any opinions on any of them that you are willing to share, I would love to read them

I think I, like everyone else, love the Wyll/Karlach dynamic. What's fun is it can really go any way you like it. Enemies to friends to lovers. Platonic best friends. Our fates are intertwined and always have been- the duke's son and the wild child, like every god tier trope exists within their friendship/relationship. Wyll's good ending is going to Avernus WITH Karlach. It's more than just self-sacrificing- he loves her, he'll follow her to literal hell, we're not free until we're BOTH free.

I also really like Gale x Shadowheart because they have the same religious trauma. I don't think it's necessarily romantic, though the dynamic intrigues me at time. She makes time to see him in Waterdeep when its all over. I think the two of them would have a genuine understanding of the grooming that occurred, and all the ways it's messed with them- and that despite how easy it would have been for the pair of them to become cold, and cruel, and mean, they retained that goodness all the same.

Astarion x Karlach- if anyone understands how it feels to not own what happens to your body, its the two of them. They don't seem like they should care about each other and yet they have a soft spot for one another. They were forced to do the bidding of a much more powerful master and refused to let it break them. At every turn they're trying to escape, trying to free themselves, trying to live their lives on their own terms. She can't be touched and he doesn't want to be touched- if they romance each other at the tiefling party, they just sit side by side and talk and they're happy about it. Their bodies will betray them when the game is over, but rather than succumb, they choose to live.

Shadowheart x Lae'zel- I do ship this romantically, and of all the companion romances I think theirs has the most interesting of dynamics. Lae'zel argues you should let her die when you two first meet Shadowheart- Shadowheart turns around and tries to kill Lae'zel the first chance she got. Lae'zel owes her continued existence to Shadowheart, and Shadowheart betrayed Lae'zel's people in order to obtain the artifact. They're both pawns in service of a goddess bent on consuming every piece of them before ultimately discarding them.

Wyll x Astarion- Wyll is the white knight, the tall, dark, and handsome hero, a prince by all accounts. Astarion is an asshole, he's unprotected and used to looking out only for himself, vulnerable and hiding it behind 100 layers of malice and sarcasm. He used to dream of a savior- Wyll would have saved him had he known of Astarion's predicament. Wyll is the monster hunter, Astarion the monster. They trade banter back and forth. Astarion asks Wyll if he's heard of Cazador, Wyll argues that Astarion should remain a spawn and retain whatever remains of his mortality. They should be enemies but they aren't.

Lae'zel and Gale- they are endlessly curious about one another. She offers to teach him to fight, he wants to know more about her home world. Of all the companions, Gale takes the most time to get to know Lae'zel's culture. He laughs when she makes a joke about gnomes. She insults him the least of all the companions- and compliments him first out of everyone. When Mystra orders Gale to kill himself, Lae'zels defense of Gale's ability to take down the brain without sacrificing himself is hands down my favorite piece of dialogue in the game.

[angie-long-legs]

Inside the gold box is...

...a male grooming kit. From VoxTek.

It's got shavers (with spare razor blades), shaving cream, shampoos, conditioners, shower gels, deodorants, soap bars, hand wash, lotions, suncream, sunglasses, a sunhat, a beach towel with a picture of Valentino in a mankini, toothbrushes, toothpaste, nail clippers, and a couple of washcloths with the Triple V monogram. Quite a lot is stuffed into that box.

The accompanying brochure shares some marketing spiel:

"Many men desire to look good for their special lady. Or gentleman. Or non-binary joyfriend. That's why we at VoxTek have cultived this extra-special summer care package!

It's our little way of saying thank you for being a loyal customer/employee/target practice for Valentino [delete as applicable]. As the hot summer months roll in for those in the northern hemisphere, we want to make your stay in Hell just that little bit sunnier!

VoxTek! Trust us with your body!"

The smaller text at the bottom reads, "Additional blades, lotions, and Valentino mankini towels sold separately. VoxTek cannot and will not be held responsible for any cuts, bruises, burns, loss of limb, dry skin, rashes, rotting teeth, stomach cramps, chickenpox, decapitations, relationship breakdown, or hilariously bad hairstyles that may occur while using VoxTek products."

There's a bonus present at the bottom too - a stuffed toy deer that's covered in red paint and has loads of pins sticking into it. The tag reads,

"Angel.

Give this to Alastor. Tell him he smells like an elephant's butt.

Vox.

P.S. Val says I'm hotter than you."

Upon finding the grooming paraphernalia within, Angel was pleasantly surprised. He had half expected this to be some kind of prank, orchestrated by someone who wanted to take him down a peg or two. Of course, curiosity still outweighed the potential risk - as always. And this time, it appeared to have paid off.

Raking through the items, he unfurled the towel and was met with the image of his bikini'd boss posing seductively - and promptly rolled it back up. Yeah, Niffty could have that one for cleaning rags. Or maybe Cherri would come over and burn it with him. It would be equally fun to see the moth cut to pieces and dunked in bleach as it would be to see him burnt to cinders.

As for the... other gift. There was no way Angel was giving that to Alastor. He was 99% sure it contained some kind of camera or microphone, but he wasn't about to start squeezing the pin-laden plush to find out.

He rolled his eyes at the final message. There was no doubt in his mind that no such words had been spoken, and Vox simply wanted to use this gift as an opportunity throw shade at Angel and Alastor - his two most detested hotel residents!

Who he went to the bother of sending gifts to.

What a freak.

[abusivelittlebunny]

Bestie, please i need you to write something for Logan x pierce 🥺 I'm so fucking happy you're getting into Boyd's stuff

Bestie I want to desperately but I haven't even seen the movie all I know about it is from Tumblr gifsets thanks to @conradrasputin who got me hooked on the whore that is Donald Pierce. But that doesn't mean I don't already have fic ideas...

1. I feel like it's mandatory to write a good nasty smut where Pierce uses that lovely robotic hand of his to pleasure himself, he fixes it up on his own to have a nice vibrating function that he can abuse his prostate with with a special elastic glove covering the cold metal skeleton. He's in the middle of fingering his brains out and twisting his nipple piercings with his other hand (because of course a whore like him has nipple piercings and a tongue piercing) when some lower rank henchman coworker of his walks in on him. Pierce at first tries to angrily dismiss the dumb hunk of muscle but then figures he may be of some help and uses him as his own personal dildo but the guy finishes too quickly inside him, leaving Pierce unsatisfied until he notices the other henchmen peeking through the door to jack off to the sight. Pierce invites them all in to find out how much they can satisfy him.

2. I also want to write of course a fic where Pierce uses X-24 as his personal guard dog/favorite dildo because he loves his men rough and X-24 has been the most perfectly brutal animalistic bedpartner he ever had; besides that he always wanted a dog. He puts a collar and sometimes a leash on X-24 and pets his head or scratches under his jawline when his perfect beast does something well and he rewards him by bending over for a fuck or giving him a blowjob. He can't stop moaning "Come on, boy, ah that's it, good boy, fuck me hard, good boy," as X-24 ruts into him and then he lets the beast cuddle him close as a reward and lick and groom him like he'd with a mate. After a while Pierce barely has to give any verbal orders he can just snap his fingers and X-24 knows what he wants which is either sex or kill. X-24 also starts protecting him on his own instinct, Pierce could be in a sticky situation and X-24 drops everything to save him instead of listening to the given order. Pierce finds the misbehavior troublesome but he can't help but call his beast a good boy when he carries him out covered in wounds that'd kill a normal man.

3. Speaking of X-24, I definitely want a fic where Pierce already has an established master-dildodog relationship with him and Pierce manages to capture Logan who he's obsessed with. I want a scene of Pierce tracing his hands along Logan's thighs who can't do anything about it because he's tightly bound meanwhile Pierce muses how damn familiar Logan is even if Logan doesn't know just how well Pierce knows his body. "I know the exact shape and size of your cock, how you like it sucked, and what your weaknesses are. Like when I do this," and he licks at the shell of Logan's ear and bites it just hard enough and Logan trembles into it, his cock stirring involuntarily and Pierce continues with a pleased humm "you'll instantly get turned on. I also know you're a cuddly one after sex, quite keen on marking your territory." And Logan has no idea how Pierce would know such private informations until X-24 prowls in and bumps his head against his master in an affectionate gesture while glowering at Logan himself, seeing him as a damn challenger. But Pierce doesn't want them fighting he wants them working together to give him pleasure and an incredibly twisted threesome occurs where Pierce gets dpd and spitroasted to hell and back.

4. It wouldn't be me if I didn't want an omegaverse au where Pierce while still a mercenary is an omega who volunteers to carry Logan's kids next to the cloning plan to get little supersoldiers from his DNA. Logan is captured and gets rut enducing drugs injected into him when Pierce quits his suppressants to induce heat in himself. No matter how bad Logan hated the guy, an alpha in rut only sees a beautiful omega in heat ready for a good breeding in Pierce at that moment and all forms of restraining are useless as they couple like feral dogs in the allocated cell. Their breeding lasts for a whole week and by the end of it Pierce is not only knocked up with a full litter but also got claimed by Logan, both of them too lost in passion at that time to care but now months later Pierce is actually annoyed by it because his instincts make him crave his mate and the thought of giving his babies away for science experiments seem less and less appealing. He gets almost daily doctor's check ups to see the progress in his womb and is allowed a weekly meeting with Logan to keep the omega in him happy because a happy omega is a healthy fetus. Logan despite himself also develops strong feelings to protect Pierce and their babies and they end up escaping together before the babies are born to raise them in a remote cabin after killing off the people working for the evil organization. I'm a sucker for domestic endings like this

5. Because he's serving LDR trailer Park hooker vibes I desperately want to create a fic (with or without the powers) where it's like current regular times and Donald Pierce hooks up with this sexy gruff older stranger Logan at a gas station toilet and its so incredibly hot both of them are shaken by it (Pierce acts like a tough guy until he's getting his face fucked against the grimy toilet stall door and then bends over the sink to get his ass resized) but they both know it must stay a one time thing. Until they end up seeing each other not two days later at the same cheap motel they're both coincidentally staying at and they tumble into Pierce's room for hot nasty sex (but before that Logan rushes back to his own room for five minutes saying that uh he left his condoms there which is weird because Pierce says he can just use his own and then Logan ends up not even using any condoms and just pumps him full of cum) and Pierce is honestly above the clouds enough that he offers Logan the chance to sleep over which he's never done with a random hookup before but Logan declines and retires to his own room leaving Pierce cold and confused. The next day Pierce sees Logan pack his car and take off and decides to follow him instead of going on his work related trip. He stops not short from where Logan stops and goes into the Diner they stopped in front of first so it doesn't seem like it's Pierce who's following him, taking a seat at the bar and pointedly not paying attention when he hears people come in behind him. He sucks on his strawberry milkshake and eats his fries putting them on his tongue one by one with carefully practiced casual sluttyness while reading his work texts on his phone, rolling his eyes and sighing dramatically as he feels a particular pair of eyes on him and when he slips out of his seat and heads for the men's room he doesn't even need to wait to hear the steps to know Logan will follow. Which he does, bless his heart, and Pierce gives a coy "I'm starting to think you're following me," before he gets pushed out on the back exit and gets ravished against the wall in the alley behind the diner. The fuck is hard and rough and fast and everything Pierce needs to cum his brains out but after it's done and he chuckles "mmm you should've bought me dinner first," Logan huffs that he doesn't think that's a good idea before going back in the diner leaving the younger man alone. Pierce doesn't get why Logan wouldn't want to hang out after they've had such glorious sex not once but three times but when he goes back he does quickly realize because Logan's small daughter is munching down on a big burger right across from him and he's doing his best not to look at Pierce paying his tab and leaving. Pierce sits in his car silently smoking and watching Logan and his daughter Finnish their meal, waiting for what Pierce assumes would be his wife to come by the table as well but she never does and the two of them leave on their own. Should Pierce keep following and trying to pursue a single dad on a road trip with his daughter just for the sake of some splendid dick and end up learning how to be a good stepmommy just so he can date said single dad? Maybe not, but Donald Pierce loves bad ideas.

6. that being said I do want a fic where Logan and Pierce are in the beginning of their relationship and Pierce has to try to deal with the fact that he not only has a new man but with that comes an unexpected new stepdaughter and how difficult it is to maneuver around their kid for fun sexy times. Its maddening how Logan doesn't want to fuck him over the kitchen counter or table because his daughter eats there or how he must keep his moans muffled into the pillow so Laura won't hear or how they can't do any flirting around Laura as if that'd do her any harm. Don't get him wrong he gets along with Laura well enough but her dad is just far too overly protective and Pierce just wants to get dicked the fuck down!!! This could also be an omegaverse where Pierce wants Logan to breed him already buy Logan is afraid Laura might feel less important if they start having babies now and Pierce is outraged by that. He needs his eggs cracked and his name dropped. That means he wants to have babies and get married NOW you old fuck come on!

7. I know the prev few seem like long multichapter fics but I also want a nice short smut shot based on the knowledge that Logan is supposed to be a limo driver in that movie as a job, and hearing that I immediately came up with a no powers au where Logan gets hired by Pierce's boss as personal limo driver only the boss himself barely ever uses said limo and instead it's Pierce taking high profile clients and business partners out for fine dining or exclusive clubs or just plain old serving champagne in the limo while Pierce whores himself out to different men like five times a week and Logan has front row seats to watch as Pierce sucks on the cock of the client of the day or rides a business partner for some deal his boss needs. Pierce quickly catches on that the hot limo driver likes to watch and makes sure to put on a good show for him. One night when Logan is supposed to pick up Pierce and another client from the club only Pierce gets in the car, clearly irritated and wearing his sunglasses but those don't cover the split lip he's got as he grumbles for Logan to take him home. Logan hears as Pierce calls up his boss and tells him he couldn't secure the deal which results in a lot of yelling on the other end of the phone but Pierce just looks tired as he mumbles his apologies, nothing like his usual cocky self. Pierce asks Logan to park in the garage and then come up to his apartment if he wants a bonus and Logan is mad enough to comply and give Pierce what he needs; a good hard fuck to calm him down and then a sweet and gentle one he's too tired to resist against to make him fall asleep. For such a tough nasty guy he sure loves to cuddle in his sleep.

[tommyspeakycap]

omgg write something about playing or braiding jack’s hair

oh em gee I love this !!!!! I loved his hair braid too omg

Jack had a very specific barber he liked to go to to get the same quality haircut he always got. He trusted that specific barber and his appointments were always made in advance to absolutely ensure he could get it done the way he liked by whom he liked at the right time so it never got overgrown or hard to manage. Jack was very specific about his hair and about keeping it the way he liked it to be. It was part of his image, part of him really. The Brummie boy hated when anyone else touched it. Be that joking team members giving his head a teasing push or his dad ruffling his hair each time he walks in the door, it irks the living daylights right out of him.

So it seems as though it’s Jack’s own personal nightmare now the barbers are shut with absolutely no sign of opening up for at least another month and Jack can’t seem to take one minute more of training with his hair getting all up in his eyes, dropping into his face and blowing wildly in Birmingham wind even with a headband in. It is driving him absolutely insane. It’s all he can think of in this moment.

And that is because he currently has your fingers tangled in it completely absentmindedly as he lays in between with your legs with his legs stretched out along the L section of the L shaped couch. Your eyes are fully focussed on the storyline evolving throughout an old episode of Greys Anatomy. Jack’s arms are around your torso as his head rests comfortably on your lower stomach with his eyes peacefully shut. He would usually engage in the TV with you, but the preseason after an unexpected break that had him doing less exercise than he definitely should have been doing had him absolutely shattered.

It was rare for even you to touch the locks he took so laughably serious, but it felt like the most soothing experience he’d maybe ever had to feel the gentility of your finger massaging over his scalp in the most relaxing manner he’d ever known. Even his sports massages after long matches weren’t this relaxing.

“Mmmhm, feels so good.” He murmurs, his voice ticking your stomach as he speaks against it, the sigh that leaves him making you giggle in response. “So annoyin’ in training.” He adds tiredly, but not lacking in the obvious irritation he feels towards it. Jack tends to feel a lot and often, and even seemingly small things like his hair getting in the way of his play was unimaginably irritating for him.

“I could cut it?” You suggest.

“Yeah,” he snorts, “And end up like the poor dog? I’ll pass love.”

“Aw come on! It wasn’t that bad.” You retort

“He looked like a street rat with curls, sweetheart.” He laughs, despite the disappointment he feels for your hands leaving his hair for the first time since he lay down tonight.

“Cheek.”

“Sorry baby.” He lulls, finally looking up at you for the first time, lifting his face to offer you a smile that strained him. Holding his head up like that was too much for his already tired muscles, so he’s quickly laying his head back to its resting place. You can’t think of anything else to retort with, knowing full and well the incredibly poor state of affairs that occurred in your household three weeks into Lockdown 1 after you attempted to give the dog a haircut out of pure boredom and lack of open dog grooming services. The state of affairs being Jack crawling to the bathroom on his knees and one hand with the other hand holding onto his crotch because he was trying so hard not to wet himself from laughing at the poor pup who looked so confused that his dad hadn’t been able to greet him as normal when he returned from the weekly food shop.

Jack very nearly did piss on your good cream carpet that day, so it was fair for him to not trust your barber skills either. Especially being the way he is about his hair.

“You know the old episodes make me miss Derek.” You announce after a moment of only the television speaking between the two of you.

“He the one with the hair?” Jack mumbles. You snort a laugh.

“They’ve all got hair, Jack. Go on, say it then?”

“Fine,” he huffs indignantly, “The one with the good hair.”

Your giggle makes his heart erupt into butterflies that dance through his stomach and chest just like it does every single time he gets to be lucky enough to hear it. Jack doesn’t like to admit when others have hair he likes. He prefers to live in a world where his hairstyle is simply the best, and truly he usually does. He tends to live in his own world anyway. The world where his hair is fantastic, he gets to do what he loves for a living and come home to you each and every day. That’s his world and fucking hell does he love that world.

In reality though, part of that world is that however fictional Derek Shepherd may be, his hair is fantastic and always looks rather immaculate. Something Jack can’t quite relate to at this current moment in time. “You know this episode is kinda about his hair,” you note softly, hands smoothing back over your boyfriends brown locks. He knows by the tone of your voice that you’re going to go into more detail about the episode currently playing through on Amazon Prime TV. Some people may well have been annoyed listening to their girlfriends recounting entire episodes of TV shows that they weren’t exactly inclined to watch, but Jack was not one of those men. He didn’t care what you were talking about, just the sound of you talking was enough to make him listen intently. He loved to hear you talk, and if that was the only thing that he ever got to hear for the rest of his life then he’d still be happy.

“They adopted a little girl and he hasn’t quite figured her hair out yet but everyone’s shocked ‘cause his hairs pretty good. Like you, a little. You got good hair, just haven’t learned to manage it yet eh?” You explain, weaving your fingers in and out of those stands of hair that make him hum in both understanding and enjoyment. He isn’t sure what you’re doing, but the weaving of stands, pads of your fingers dancing over his scalp carefully, softly feels like what he might imagine heaven to be. “Yeah?” He asks, “And what does he do then?” His voice is filled with genuine interest for what you were saying. It was the first time you’d ever known that in a relationship. He heard you snigger softly to yourself. “He learns from someone who knows a bit more about hair than he does.” You state pointedly, prompting him to roll his eyes even if you can’t see him.

“I’m not letting you cut my hair, (y/n). Not happening, I’m sor-“

“Alright, Jack. I bloody know! That’s not what I meant.” You grumble. Jack can immediately imagine your disgruntled pout already, with those irritated narrowed eyes and the playful scrunch of your nose. “Sorry.” Every time he sees that look on you, he moves to kiss that furrow out of your nose. It makes his heart smile each and every time he sees it. You are simultaneously the most beautiful, more adorable and hottest woman he has ever laid his eyes on. “Sorry baby,” he reiterated, “Go on.”

“I could braid it for you?”

That earns a belly laugh from him that reverberates through your body, jostling with the force of his whole body laughter. “So you will,” he bellows in breaks between the ever comedic gasping from breath after each loud laugh. “Not a chance.”

He pushes himself up to sit back on his knees, trapping your legs between his as he looks down at you with a huge grin still stretching his lips and creasing his eyes, yet they still sparkle in adoration for you. “Oh yeah?” You muse with a giggle to follow despite the firm attempt to seal it behind clenched lips. The giggle sets those dimples into your cheeks, his eyes just drinking you up as you lounge back on the huge couch there in front of him, sinking back into the pillows just like he had been sinking against you in comfort for hours only moments ago. “Yeah.” He repeats firmly, the playful jest of his words not lost on your ears as he leans forward.

With the emission of only a small, surprised yelp from you that turns the head of the dog in his bed for only a moment, Jack has grabbed your legs to tug you down so you were laying flat on your back on the L of the sofa. He leans over you, hands and strong arms keeping him above you with ease. “Realllly?” You tease, one eyebrow quirked. Jack loves it when you do that, mostly because he can’t and he finds it beautifully funny.

Your hands reach up to his face, cupping over the beard on his cheeks to bring his face down to peck his lips before letting him press back up like a simple press up over your body. This was a common occurrence between the pair of you and Jack had always loved to show off. “Not cuttin’ about with a braid in my hair baby, sorry.”

He dips down for another kiss and you break out another giggle that parts your lips from his. “You already are, bub.”

“Ya what?” He pops straight up, sitting again back on his knees. “Not falling over your face now eh?” You taunt with a cheeky grin that makes him furrow his brows. Jack removed his hands from beside you to run one after the other over the top of his hair, a weird mix of a grin and disbelief washing over his face. Your sweetheart smile warms his heart as you lay there looking up at him with tired eyes and a lazy smile, cheeks flushed and one of his old cotton shirts keeping you warm long after his body raises from yours.

“Wait there!” He yells, bounding off the couch to all but leap through the living room until he reaches the mirror in the hall just outside the door. “Babe!” He cheers through the house, appearing back in the doorway of the room. “Nah it’s kinda cool, you fuckin’ smashed that!” You sit up and turn around towards him with your hand covering your mouth in a giggle that makes him stride forward and tug your hand away so he can see that beautiful smile. He jumps back again. “And look; stays in when I move around like-”

An immediate howl of laughter breaks out of your mouth with your head tipped back in hysterics as you watch him run on the spot, jump on the spot and then shake his head around like your puppy when he had a cone on his head. You laugh so hard your laughter looses its noise, simply existing as a elongated wheeze and a sudden gasp for desperate air to aid and allow for only more laughter. “Why you laughing for?” He yells, his words split by his own laughter as he tugs you to your feet, standing taller than him when your on your feet on the couch. Jack wraps one arm around your waist and moves the other down to the bend of your knees to sweep your legs from beneath you, perching you on the edge of the back of the couch.

“It,” kiss, “is,” kiss, “perfect.” Kiss.

“Just like you, baby.” He rumbles lowly, “Perfect just like my girl. Gonna wear it to training. Keep hair out my face, remind me of you, perfect.” He just keeps talking, keeps praising you between kisses while he brings you closer and closer to him until you can wrap your legs around him. Locked in place, he takes your face in his hands.

“So you’ll let me braid it again?” You chime, eyes lighting up. Jack chuckles, thumbs smoothing over your cheeks with a kiss pressed to the tip of your nose. “Course baby. Every day.”

True to his word Jack Grealish is. Every night he comes home from his training, he’s laying on the couch letting you massage the days stresses out of his mind, letting your fingers weave the tension out of his scalp. Jack’s never let anyone take care of him so much. He’s never felt comfortable to be taken care of like this, but you are his exception. His one single exception. And every morning he sits in the floor at the foot of the bed while you sit with a leg on either side of him, fingers weaving the strands into place for the day and tighter for match days. People make comments but Jack doesn’t give even half of a shit. His hair is how he likes it; out of his face so he can concentrate on his game and it gives you more of a reason to actually be up in the morning when he leaves before the sun rises above you. That’s perfect for Jack.

Until his next haircut, the only time that footballer doesn’t have a braid through his hair is when your fingers are tangling in it while he’s between your legs for another very enjoyable reason.

[chanluster]

the duke and i | {m} ; {f}

teaser | bridgerton! au | f2l! au | approx. 25k words

“The Duke of Hastings can show you much more than what you write of.”

s u m m a r y >> wishing to be a successful writer in the regency period seemed next to impossible for the sole daughter of a dead earl. with arising pressures from your mother to tie the knot, you turn to your dearest friend, hwang hyunjin, duke of hastings and the most eligible, scandalous bachelor of the season, for assistance. when he suggests the insane of idea of marrying each other to help each other, you agree to the proposal, unaware of just how much the duke can teach you of the wonders of matrimony.

w a r n i n g s >> noble! reader, duke! hyunjin, hyunjin is a fucking rake, reader is a fucking nerd, also really really innocent, hyunjin is sosososo hot, a lot of teasing, endearments, sexual tension, kissing, making out, corruption kink!!!!! corruption! fucking! kink! oral (f. receiving) fingering, unprotected sex (stay safe hoemies!!) orgasming on multiple occasions, (kind of) hate sex, there is fluff i promise, tiny bit of angst

p l a y l i s t >> here!

t a g l i s t >> @fivefootfuryanon @h0eforhyunjin16 @seoulicitae @linoscult @aliceu @hwangi @shipsaremything98 @babyyynatty @kabira @danyxthirstae01 @sunseokkies @lunefilm @severetimetravelnerd @minaamhh @starry--koo @ninjaleeknow @hyunjeonnies @inlovewithasa @titleisyettobemade @maedesculpaeusoubi​@healinghyunjin @fleeingreality (send an ask if u wish to be added!!)

a u t h o r ’ s  n o t e >> hello hi i am finally writing this fic!! bridgerton may be problematic but simon basset was still the sexiest man i’ve ever seen in period dramas so here is hyunjin being that exact sex god in this teaser i hope you enjoy <3

back to masterlist

“____, YOU HAVE WRITTEN A BLOODY MASTERPIECE!”

Your entire body stilled.

“I...I did what?”

“Wrote a masterpiece!” He swiped through the pages, lighting up at each word that passed his gaze. “A bestseller! An award winning novel!” 

A smile worked its way onto your lips. “You...you really think so?”

Sighing out in exasperation, he set the papers upon the desk as he began to lose his initial anger. “How could you be embarrassed about something so beautiful?” He put his hand on the gold chair, leaning onto its head. “Your descriptions were lovely, the characters are perfectly imperfect. You have really outdone a lot of the writers in circulation.”

Your shoulders sagged a little — almost as if you had been carrying a heavy burden, and this man had taken it off of you.

You made sure he saw your joy when you said, “Thank you, blondie.”

Seeing the pure contentment upon your face had your friend looking away, eyes narrowing to the plans once again.

“There was, however, one thing which needed improvement.”

The setback had you straightening once again, eager to hear. At least he was not sweetening it fully. “Go on.”

“As I was reading through, right till the end, I noticed a lack of very important details.” 

That was quite strange. “A lack of?” you asked, when you were so sure that you had added too much of everything.

“Yes.”

His fingers drummed against the velvet of the chair.

“I noticed that there was a deep lack of...passion.”

An incredulous look was your reply. “Passion?”

“Yes, passion. Desire.” He jerked his head towards the papers. “I hardly saw any of those emotions in the book.”

This new information was certainly quite worrying. “But I do not understand,” you started. “My whole novel is based on this relationship, of the love that blossoms and grows—”

“I understand that, darling, I really do,” he said. “I know what you are going to say.” 

The drumming continued. “But where is that residing in the chapters? Where is that physical lust implied in the characters?”

Lust. 

You had heard of the word before. Heard of its implications, yet never grasped the weight of its meaning. Was it just another form of longing? 

If only your mother had given you an education on this side of love.

“What do you mean...lust?”

Hyunjin raised a groomed brow. “What else could I mean, angel?”

The way he voiced that question, that endearment had you parting your mouth, unable to say anything. You tried to speak, to say something to ease the tension which came slithering back into the bedroom.

“I...what were you expecting? From the relationship.”

Curling his locks behind his ear, his gaze became obscure. “You spoke of forbidden love, of...of a coupling which should not be occurring but happened through the fate of the universe. Is that right?”

When you nodded, he carried on. “See, I did not sense that from their exchanges. Their emotions are tame, chaste. An innocence which cannot be tainted.

“Now where is the fun in that?”

You dared not break his gaze. “What is that ‘fun’?”

His eyes seemed to darken. “That ‘fun’ in the relationship is physicality. Where is that in your novel?” 

He took a step towards you. “Where are the unbreaking stares? The curious hands, aching to caress another’s? Where are the trembling breaths, the lust-stained sighs that fan lovers’ lips?”

The duke had you craning your neck back as he looked down at you. “Where are the kisses, my darling?”

You gulped. “K-kisses?”

“Yes, kisses,” he repeated softly. “Lips enveloping lips, tasting your inner workings? Travelling to your neck, your collarbone...places which cannot even be whispered in polite society?”

Each part he mentioned had its goosebumps pricking.

The bastard still did not stop. “Where is that passion, ____? Where is that forbidden love, which makes the heart burn wilder?”

And as he descended before you on his knees, hands settling on your lap, you had a feeling swirl up your sides which had never struck you before.

“If I were the man in your book, I would not be tame with you.” 

His eyes offered a new, intimidating darkness. “Because if you were my woman, then I do not think I’d control myself. The moment I’d catch the innocence dancing in your eyes, I’d have waltzed it away into my shadows.

“Only God could save you from my hunger, then.”

Silence descended upon the two of you.

One waiting for the other to speak, and the other unable to form the words to do so.

The moon had illuminated your husband, one side of his face glowing like a celestial being, the other side basked in darkness. How strange, when he had compared himself to it just a few moments before.

You seemed unable to look away from him. His gaze, always intense, now became so penetrating you wondered whether he could glance at your soul, quivering from his feedback. 

Improvements which you still did not quite comprehend, despite the implications.

Somehow, he could see it on your face. “I have a feeling you still do not grasp the idea. Is that correct?”

A half nod. “I…” God, speak! “I just...I have never understood it, Hyunjin.”

Your head dipped down, darting at the plains of your hands. “You asked me about lust, and I simply cannot answer because I do not know. I have never experienced such emotion.

“Hell, I have not witnessed a single action that you spoke of. How could you expect me to write of desires I have never even felt?”

This.

This was unchartered territory. This was a terrain you had not explored with him.

Yes, he was your best friend. But one does not talk of such...dangerous conservation when your best friend happens to be a man — a complete rake, at that.

It seemed as if the rake, too, was thinking the same. 

His legs, a force which had never let him down, threatened to buckle under him. His mouth opened, only for silence to answer you. 

Lord and all His subjects help him. He did not think he could contain it any longer.

And as his eyes exposed you, vulnerable before him, he only knew of one thing — one fact within this ocean of uncertainty you swam in.

He would jump into the waters for you. But not in the notion to haul you out to safety.

No, the duke would drag you down further, with him as your sole saviour.

Or even your destroyer. Your fated undoing.

For the Duke of Hastings will absolutely ruin you, body and soul.

“Hyunjin?”

A blink.

A singular action, dragging him back to dark, dark reality — sweeter than his fantasies as it sat before him, shy and wide-eyed.

An innocent reality all for him to defile.

“Yes, angel?”

You tried not to shudder at his lilting whisper. “How am I to be helped?”

The man did not even think of the possibilities, to your surprise.

If only you knew, how long he had kept them hidden for.

“How about...how about I assist you?”

Confusion washed over your features. “And how would you assist me, Hyunjin? You have never written a novel.”

His answer was a chuckle, revealing slight glimpses of his teeth as he stood.

“That is true, yes.”

Sitting down beside you, he planted his hands behind him on the bed, leaning into the position. 

“But what I can provide aid for is the one feature you lack in your writing.”

His voice right behind gave you a fright.

“Pure, raw lust.”

Looking over yourself, you watched him reclined in ease. Your speech was uneven as you said, “And...and how will you help me with that?”

“Simple, my darling.” A pause, looking you over. “I shall provide you with examples. Show you what truly happens between a man and woman when all they yearn for is each other.”

He saw the further questions in your gaze. The questions you dared not voice out loud, perhaps dared not understand. 

Smirking, he sat himself up, eyes never leaving yours as his hands encircled your own, bunched up in your dress. As his fingers brushed against your linen he felt his skin go aflame. 

“If, of course, you would let me.”

Tilting your head slightly upwards, you sensed a foreign warmth envelop your face, burning at the sight of your friend studying you like an empty canvas, begging to be filled.

Maybe you were an empty sheet of paper, waiting to be painted with guidance by the master. Maybe that master was beside you all along.

“What will you do to me, Hyunjin?”

There it was. The question which may have been his drug — his purest form of opium. 

Because when his hands travelled upwards, sliding to your face and imprisoning you with his stare, he knew he would become addicted.

A shame he did not care for his well-being when you were so fucking tempting.

“Show you what real passion tastes like.”

[imagine-that-one-thing]

Her Majesty || 18

Queen

April 15th

Morning discovered me hours ago when Harry's alarm trumpeted through the room, and he forced himself out of bed. Since four o'clock this morning, I have been in and out of sleep. If I am honest, I don't want to take on the day. I have been dreading this day for years, and quite frankly, have been praying it would never come – but I was ill-prepared for how quickly it snuck up on me. But here I am, on the warm side of my bed, longing for my past self as Princess Anastasia but having to remind myself of my new title as Queen.

"What is the Queen going to do on her first day as Queen? What's the first order?" Harry softly requests, and I raise my brow as I convene up against the pillows and cock my head to the side.

I want to spend my day in bed and wrap my head around things.

"What is the King's first order?" I respond with a hint of sarcasm laced to my tone.

Harry elevates his beverage to his lips and shrugs, "I am on my third coffee, and my duties are to keep the palace safe, the same as any other day," Harry responds, not appearing to be phased by the fact that he has a title.

"You do realise that even by telling everyone that I would be king, I cannot be King, Anna."

"You do realise that I make the rules, right?"

Harry laments, "A King has a higher power over Queen. Therefore, I do not have the right to be over you, Anastasia. Therefore, I cannot be titled, King."

I roll my eyes, "We can have this conversation later. I am going back to sleep."

"No, you are not," Harry returns as I settle into the bed and draw the blankets to shelter around my body. "Anastasia, you have a strict itinerary that you have to stick to, which means your ladies will be up here in ten minutes."

I stare at Harry and groan, "Did I forget to ask to sleep in?" I could have sworn that being Queen didn't come with an obligation to be awake at the crack of dawn.

"Well, I did ask the bagpipes from a piper just below the terrace to be put on hold until seven, darling," Harry notifies me.

"And what time is it now?" I request.

Harry smirks, and I moan as he glances at his watch before flicking his eyes towards me. That damn smirk gives it away.

I wait a few moments, and the bagpipes commence their morning routine. Every morning at around six, I am awakened by the Piper's sounds to the Sovereign if I am not already awake. My father resented it, but he kept it around, not only because it is part of the Royal arrangements but because my mother appeared to love the morning wake up calls. Most of the wakeup sequences were at six, but my father extended it to nine in certain months. Of course, it depended on what was transpiring in the royal world.

The Piper's principal responsibility is to play every weekday at six or nine am for approximately 15 minutes under His Majesty's window when he is in residence at Buckingham Palace. Now that I am Her Majesty, they play for me, under my terrace. I don't want to remove the pipers, essentially because it is a tradition, but I will be damned to be woken up every morning with them under my terrace at six in the morning.

"Thanks for the hour," I sigh, rubbing my eyes. "Can you please request that the time is changed from six? I prefer not to hear them until at least ten, perhaps eleven?" I softly beam, doing my ablest to appreciate the art of the bagpipes.

Harry steps closer and hands me his coffee before leaning down and kissing my cheek, "I don't think they will appreciate playing so late."

"Nine?" I suggest, "I think that is fair."

"I think that is fair," Harry nods his head, and I take a few sips of his warm coffee.

"Could you make this any stronger?" I chuckle, taken back by the intensity of his coffee.

Harry shrugs his shoulder, "At least I didn't add bourbon to it this morning," Harry sarcastically smiles.

I hand Harry his coffee back with another stifled laugh escaping my lips. I know that he adds a little alcohol to his coffee some days towards the ends of his shifts, especially if they have been excessive and problematic. "What do you have today?" I softly ask while we have a few extra minutes alone.

Harry steps away from the bed and tells me what he has planned for his day. My head cocks to the side as he stands in front of me, everything about him causing me to smile and swoon over him.

Harry is incredibly handsome and never fails to find me between shifts to give me a few minutes of his short time. This man with dewy, mist valley-green eyes, lush hair he grooms so carefully that has a rippling quality, is a man that I thank the heavens for every day. The last few months have been horrible and heartbreaking, there are still days where I have no clue how the fuck I am going to survive the journey without my father, but Harry always makes sure to make it known that he is right beside me through everything.

Harry is a man that holds my heart in his golden hands and cherishes it, he has every opportunity to throw it to the wall and walk out, but he doesn't. He has managed to survive the horrible honeymoon phase. Our honeymoon phase hasn't been what it was meant to be; it has been emotional crying, it has been painful, sad, and full of anger all in one.

The man in front of me is dashing with a rascal's smile and worked his magic to give me what was rightfully mine, he didn't pride himself on running the monarch for a short time, and he didn't try to keep the authority that he had. The man that stands in front of me is an exceptional husband; I couldn't have asked for anyone better, and one day, he will be a great father to our children if we ever have children. This man is an influence on society, and I am lucky to have him.

Harry waves his hands in front of me, "Anna? Baby, are you listening?" Harry questions, snapping me from my daze.

I take a breath and smile at him, "Yeah," I lie through my teeth, and Harry shakes his head disapprovingly.

"You're shocking at lying."

I lift my shoulders into a shrug and push the covers off my body. I swing my legs over the edge of the bed and step towards Harry. I kiss him sweetly before pulling away and smiling. "What was that for?"

I offer him nothing but a small smile and dreamy eyes that can't peel themselves away from him.

"Mmm, I need to get back to work," Harry changes the subject as two of my lady in waiting's walk-in. "See you later," Harry kisses me softly, becoming rigid as he clears his throat and notices the ladies looking at the two of us. Harry doesn't feel comfortable with PDA in front of the staff and is still unsure how to act. It's humorous to a certain extent. He hated hiding the relationship, and now he doesn't know what to do now that he doesn't have to hide anything.

I reach for his hand as he steps away. Harry stops and looks over his shoulder before turning back around to face me, "What is it?" he softly asks. My eyes glance between him and his coffee in his hand. Harry rolls his eyes and hands me his coffee, "You're lucky I love you, my darling," Harry grins, "Now, goodbye," he begins to walk away, leaving me with the rest of his coffee and my staff.

I chuckle as the ladies watch him leave, swooning over him in the same manner I do. "You're lucky," one begins as she holds a few dresses across her arms.

"I know," I smile, well aware of how lucky I am. "What do I have the pleasure of wearing today?" I question, looking at the dresses, giving the ladies full reign of what they dress me in as I sit down on the edge of the bed.

♛ ♛ ♛

When I was a little girl, I filled my time prowling the hallways of the various estates we have, all of which had their unique quality. To this day, my favourite place is in Northern Ireland, Hillsborough Castle. I allocated ampere-hours in the gardens, playing hide and seek with the assistants and the bodyguards, countless hours picking wildflowers and chasing butterflies. I would do anything to go back to the days where life was simple, where all I had to think about was which flowers I desired to plant when I wasn't learning about the world and learning to speak different languages.

I remember one spring, Dad brought me to Hillsborough Castle; he and his staff purchased various flowers and shrubs I had picked out one day, we went through a magazine. We later spent that weekend planting the array of plants. Somehow, my father discovered a way to make everything match and look colour coordinated. I wasn't much assistance in the garden, I dug a few holes with my little shovel and helped water the plants, but he and his staff did most of the dirty work. It was when things were manageable, when we could be a family without anyone torturing my father. Perhaps back then, things weren't as simple as I assume, and maybe I was naive, but in my memories, things were simple.

We were happy.

Unfortunately, I can't travel to Hillsborough Castle and attain my peace, and I can't proceed to where I have always been satisfied. Right now, travelling too far is out of the question for safety reasons. Madeline can't fly back home to her family because of safety concerns. If I could, I would love to discover myself in rolling hills and grassland, where it appears neverending. I would love to advance to the countryside, to view the sunset over a meadow and gather nothing but the harmony of nature when the sun submerges into darkness. Harry's mother's home was calm and serene. There were no sounds of cars continually driving around, no people standing outside my place of residence daily, and no staff. It was normal- something I crave but can't possess. I wish I could be out feeding the baby animals and savouring life in the slow lane like I did the few times I have been up there.

I necessitate a scenery change, but I am unsure where the scenery change can occur when I am not authorised to travel. I still think running to Greece and changing our identities is a superb idea, but there is no way in hell I can convince Harry into the concept. Harry has expressed how ludicrous the idea is and logically explained to me the reasons why it is not happening. I think we would be fine with mundane duties and living in Greece. At least we wouldn't have Pippa around to pester the shit out of us. That woman is relentless; she has not given up on her notion of expressing how incompetent I am to be Queen.

What I want is for us to be happy without doubt lingering around us. I don't want the fear to continue to gloom over me. As strict as the palace is and the fact people are constantly watching, I am still concerned. Before my father's passing, I was carefree. I used to wander the halls' without much thought, but now I struggle to step outside my room without the second thought of whether something could happen.

I do not have proof of who killed my father, all I have is my suspicion, and I am convinced that these same people will come after me or, worse, Harry.

The media have attracted attention to Harry and me. The night on the balcony, as expected, drew attention to us, but in my lapse of judgment, I wasn't considering how this could affect him. He is now another target. If the Aces, whoever they may be, are still out for blood, their next bet would be him. In the mind of someone who wants revenge, money or really anything, they will go for the person who has the most impact. If they take out Harry, one less person will protect me before taking me out unless we comply with their requests. With each day that has passed since my father, I have waited for some request from this unknown group of people. I have waited for a phone call or a letter with their demands, but I have not received a single thing.

When I stayed at Harry's mother's, there were letters sent to her house addressed to myself and Harry; what happened after that night, I do not know. Harry said he would take care of it, and nothing has appeared since. After that night, I stopped looking into things and having Harry followed. I knew that he was right- some things are better left unknown. How Harry handles situations is not of my concern. Harry has his job, and I have mine. He does not tell me how to be a Royal, and I do not tell him how to do what he has to do. I know his field of work has gotten very messy over the last few months. He has done things he never imagined he would have to do.

The door to my office opens, distracting me from my daze of thoughts that have been accompanying me most of the day. Harry steps into the palace office and closes the door behind him, intentionally shutting the door on the people accompanying him. "Anna," Harry begins as he shuffles closer to the desk, he gestures between us and the door and shakes his head, "I have a man trying to measure me for clothes, a woman with an iPad wanting to be my assistant, and I have a man holding a fruit platter… Make it stop, please." Harry breathes out softly, "I appreciate their efforts, but I don't need an assistant. I can do my job."

"Fruit Platter? That is better service than me," I snicker.

"Sweetheart, I am highly frustrated with it." But, unfortunately, Harry doesn't recognise my humour or appear amused by the events.

"I will ask them to tone it down. Call them in," I instruct, gesturing towards the door.

"Surprised they can't hear us and just walk on in," Harry murmurs, advancing towards the door and unlocking it, allowing his array of followers to wander into the office.

The staff stand in front of me in a line, almost as if they are aware of what the conversation will hold. "I know you all have good intentions, but His Highness doesn't want to be followed, if he needs something, he will ask, but he doesn't need the extent of these privileges as my father did. Harry will let you know when and if he needs something. He is very low maintenance…" I graciously explain, "Mike, when he has the time, you can talk to him about suites and what he wants. Estelle, Harry doesn't want an assistant; Matthew takes care of everything. If Harry needs any help, he will ask," I direct each issue head-on, doing my best to be respectful, "And Luke, Harry doesn't need you to follow him with food unless asked; he will make his coffee when he wakes up. He takes a coffee at seven, he will ask you if he needs anything else, give him coffee, and you will be his best pal. He appreciates it, but he likes to be left to his own devices." ... "Think of him as a lone wolf, he was under the radar before marrying me, and he likes to stay that way."

Mike clears his throat and nods, "All due respect, your mother put us on his service."

"You can be on his service. Just keep a distance, thank you," I dismiss the humble team, and they all shuffle out gradually before shutting the door behind them.

"Rough first day?" I chuckle, and he leans on my desk and crosses his arms over his chest while he nods his head. "I just want to do my job, Anna."

"Well, honey, your job isn't just security anymore."

"It is," Harry disagrees.

I know the transition is going to be incredibly rough. He has gone from being security to being a husband to being a quiet King to becoming second to the throne and being waited on by the staff. I don't expect him to attend charity events, cut ribbons and be a royal member. But, on the other hand, I don't anticipate him to give up being security and guarding the palace, but I am not sure how it will operate with him being on my service.

"You know you will need security, Harry?"

"Anna, Matthew and I have it sorted out. Can we discuss something else?"

"Every Thursday, we don't have royal duties. Instead, we have family dinner with my mother," I inform Harry, "And I'd like us to commit to one day a week where it's just you and me even if it's just an hour."

Harry nods his head, "Of course, Anna."

"And we need to find our charities and volunteer work."

"Sure, I'll show kids how to run a security detail team."

"Harry," I press, "I'm serious."

"We can call it Harry's boys and girls' scouts, just without pitching a tent. Instead, I'll show them how to hogtie a person and keep people safe."

"I can't tell if you're joking or not."

Harry stares at me with a straight face, "I am not joking."

"Christ," I mutter, "How are we going to survive ruling a monarch."

Harry elevates his shoulders into a shrug, "I am just here for the ride, but I need to go over protocols and security things with you," Harry changes the subject, taking my ink pen from my hand and shifting the paperwork in front of me away from my body.

"I was working on that," I declare as I lean back in my chair and cross my arms over my chest, now mimicking his position.

Harry nods his head and places my pen in his breast pocket, "Right, so we need to have an unwritten understanding. When security says 'we are leaving', it means just that." Harry notifies me, already prompting me to roll my eyes.

"Just because my title changed doesn't mean I forgot the protocol."

Harry hums, "You need to redo your security training."… "You need to do your SAS training; you have a refresher course to do." Harry reminds me of what feels like the hundredth time.

I just have no desire to do the damn course.

"Will you be my teacher?" I smirk.

Harry sighs, "The tunnels are off-limits for the next few days."

"Oh, damn, now how I will be a product of any illegal activity? How will I escape the palace?" I sarcastically respond.

I have no intentions of escaping through the tunnels or causing any dilemmas; for the most part, I am emotionally stable and know that I cannot go off and get drunk because life as a royal isn't enjoyable.

"Princess—"

"Ah, no," I cut Harry off, "Wrong title, and don't even try to refer to me as my title. You know I hate it."

"And I hate when you make my job troublesome, which you are doing," Harry points as he gestures towards me, "Security is heightened. I need you to at least pretend to care."

"Fine," I mutter, "You're such an ass when you're the security detail."

"Anna, just get your training done with Matthew at the very least."

He is getting frustrated with me. I can tell by the way he is clenching his jaw and tapping his shoe against the flooring. He means well, but the training is a pain in my ass.

Why should we stage a kidnapping and show me how to handle the situation when if we wait long enough, it will happen?

Nothing surprises me with this monarchy. I wouldn't be surprised if Pippa tied me up, forced me in the back of her car and drove me across Europe before abandoning me in the middle of nowhere. After my father's incident, nothing is really off the table in terms of events that could take place. No amount of training saved my father.

"I will," I accept, leaning forward and standing to my feet before I encase my arms around his neck, "You need to relax," I inform him, his arms dropping to his side before his hands rest in the small of my back, enabling me to stand between his legs and bring our bodies closer. I give him a small smile. Then, I kiss him softly and leisurely.

"Easier said than done," Harry murmurs against my lips. I cut him off and kiss him more profoundly, not wanting his words but his affection.

He draws away with a sigh, "I have to be on your mother's service in a few minutes."

Mood killer.

Blinking with feigned innocence, I whisper, "Oh, come on," taking a chance and moving to caress the tender skin on his neck with sweet kisses. He cocks his head to the side, enabling me to kiss his fevered skin, my hands pursuing their way to the buttons of his shirt. Finally, my fingers touch the material of his tie, and I tug on it benevolently.

His tie unravels between my fingertips, and he moans softly when I introduce my kisses to his jawline, gingerly making my way to his lips. Aching tension between the two of us builds with a gentle persuasion of my kisses.

Harry breaths heavily, and his hands squeeze at my waist with a sense of frustration laced to them. Then, with a long, liquid kiss that rushes lust through us, his fingers dig into the material of my shirt.

Unchaining wild, delicious feelings brew inside me, eagerly demanding to escape with every moment that passes by. I feel him pull me closer, the tension at the edge of his fingertips kneading into the material.

I press my body against him, his fingers bunching my shirt even further, "Anastasia, we can't," Harry breaks our kiss with a whisper, putting space between us. He softens his eyes and shakes his head, "We are being watched," Harry breathes, "Camera's aren't cut to this room."

"Cut them, please?"

"I can't… How about later?"

I roll my eyes, irritated with him, "No."

Harry chuckles and begins to adjust his tie, clearing his throat, "I don't think you want the rest of the team watching… I get off at nine tonight. Wait up for me?"

"I think one of my executive orders as Queen is that we no longer have to schedule these things." I gesture towards the small space between us. "I'm tired of it."

It has been a hassle to get alone time with him for quite some time, and there's always something happening or someone interrupting.

"Take it up with security."

"You are security." I point out, irritarted to say the least.

"Well," Harry laughs, "I will have to have a code word with Matthew for when to cut the surveillance."

"Yeah, you get on that," I respond, taking my pen out of his pocket and sitting back down on my chair. "Can I ask you something?" I softly ask.

Harry narrows his eyes down on me, "Not sure I like the sound of this, but sure," Harry nods his head.

"This is private," I inform him.

"You can speak; nobody can hear us. They can just see us," Harry flicks his head to his side, subtly gesturing towards the hidden camera in the painting over the fireplace.

I compose myself for a moment before I take a leap of faith, "What happened with Victoria?"

"Uhm, she died?" Harry is confused.

"No, I mean the story."

I want to know the story he managed to spin to the press. I know he tends to release stories when he can’t get the Palace social media team involved.

"She was found. Louis got the coroner report back, and it was a snake bite. Unfortunately, she chose the wrong day to go hiking," Harry responds with a shrug.

"And Henry?"

Harry takes a breath and heavily sighs, "Do you not read the tabloids?" Harry sighs. I can tell that he doesn’t want to have this conversation by the way his jaw clenched and he looked around in an attempt to gain a moment to find an excuse.

"I have not been in the mood to read what the media has to say," I respond.

"Henry... He passed in his sleep peacefully."

"And what happened after the private funeral?" I question, unsure of what happened after the service took place. Against everyone's wishes, I insisted he was given a service, whether he deserved it or not for the events that took place. I didn't want everyone to be heartless. My father wouldn't have wanted such a thing.

"We all went our separate ways, you went to the room, and I went back to work?"

"No, with him. Where is he?"

"Oh," Harry sounds, "That, I cannot tell you."

I cock my head to the side, "You cannot tell me where he was laid to rest?" I am surprised.

Harry shakes his head, "No, I cannot."

"What about the rest of the Aces' like Henry's Dad?"

"Anna, I have a lot of people I am trying to track, just like I have a lot of things I need to do. I can't answer these questions. I need to go though." Harry politely dismisses the conversation.

As much as I want to press further and ask questions for my peace of mind, I know that now isn't the time or the place. "Be careful, okay?"

"Always," Harry nods before leaning down and kissing my cheek, "I love you and stay out of trouble while I am gone."

"No promises," I respond with a smile before he walks out, leaving me alone in the office where most major royal documents are signed.

This office has been used for many years by my father. It has been the places he has signed checks, and he has signed Royal assents— this room has been used for an array of different monumental things, and as I sit here in this room, I can't help but feel a weight on my shoulder intensify. I don't feel at ease as my pen glides across the paper and I sign my name across the lines; I don't feel this task is taken lightly. This office is the starting to place to the world as we know it, this room is where things begin, and as my reign begins, I am not sure my confidence starts here.

Being in the same office my father once sat in, I thought I would feel at ease and feel comfort— I don't. I feel the opposite. My world feels suffocated and anxious. This simple task of signing the lines makes me question my power. What I am doing today is a mandatory and straightforward procedure, it is nothing significant in the sense of signing a new Royal assent or signing the rights of dubbing a fresh Prince or Knight, but it feels as though it is a big deal.

I thought my mother would play a more significant role on my first day. I thought she would be with me to sign these documents and figure out what I am meant to do. But, instead, she seems to be doing her own thing. I don't blame her for not wanting to be a part of things, and the monarch has impacted her more than she would like to admit. To an extent, I think the monarch helped kill her spirits, especially in the last few months with what has been happening. My mother was nice enough to team with Harry to give me what was rightfully mine. Still, I expected to have some help from her— Mother has some insight into things, watched my father run the monarch for years, and knows a few things that I may not have caught onto, but she doesn't want to be a part of it. I have no clue where she is going.

All I know is that Harry is on her service.

♛ ♛ ♛

April 21st

Sitting in my office and staring at the four walls for days' led me to escape into the gardens to get some fresh air. Harry will kill me for coming out here without anyone with me, but I need some space. I am not surviving. I have had multiple meetings with influential people I do not know how to accommodate. I don't know why I am being thrown full force into this. I was hoping for a lighter transition, but that has been far from the case. I cannot keep up with everything. I don't know how my father managed.

The gardens are peaceful and quiet. They have always left me with a sense of calmness. No matter what is happening in my life, walking these gardens gives me a sense of hope. The gardens are blooming later than usual, but the Rhododendrons and Camellias are beginning to bloom.

I take a deep breath in the fresh air and stop wandering as I reach one of the many trees full of pink blossoms. It's breathtaking. The blossom trees leave me in awe every spring. I don't know how the gardeners keep the 39-acre garden at Buckingham Palace looking as unique as it does; everything is immaculate.

Spring-flowering trees are spread throughout the garden, but some areas are more than others. One of my favourite trails is the Queen's Walk. The walk has a vibrant display of trees and camellias. However, I am not sure what it is about the trek that excites me and brings me happiness. I am not sure if it's the outburst of assorted colours or just the quietness and the sound of nature humming.

There are more than two hundred several flowers in the gardens, varying from single flowers to frothy, peony-like efflorescences. There is a touch of everything within the gardens, and everything flows excellently. I bend down and caress my hand delicately to brush against the Blue lilacs that symbolise happiness and tranquillity, something I am longing to feel at the edge of my fingertips. I glance towards the Magenta lilacs and smile to myself, inhaling their scent and deep meaning of love and passion. The firm, sweet, heady scent of the lilacs lingers, and I stand back up, wandering away from the lilacs, leaving them to bloom on their own.

As I walk the small trail, I regard a man who appears out of place. He doesn't seem to belong here in the gardens. Nobody should be out here besides the groundskeepers, the horse trainer or security. The gardens at this time of day are not bustling with staff or anyone. They're withdrawn, which is why I prefer to wander out here. At first, I believe the worst, but my heart rate decreases and my stomach settles as soon as I notice the royal tour guide pamphlet hanging out of his pocket.

"Can I help you?" I challenge from behind, startling the man who seems to be heading towards what we call 'The island within the lake'.

Nobody goes towards the little lake; it is off-limits to most to help maintain its natural environment. I have been out there on a few occasions. It's a beautiful view, something I have always loved, but we keep it off-limits for the wildlife that is out there. We aren't one-hundred per cent on everything in the acres, but we know there is danger. My father told me a story about one of the purple flowers out there. He says it can kill someone in seconds. The poison within the purple flower is vital, so strong that years ago, dipping an arrowhead in the plant would guarantee death to anything it hits. This is how it got the nickname of "wolves bane", as it was used on arrowheads to hunt wolves to ensure they died. As scary as it sounds, it fascinated me. I am not sure how they figured out years ago that dipping an arrow would ensure death. I can only imagine someone came across the wolves bane on accident and used it for their advantage.

The unknown man turns around, and I take in his features, but what catches my eye the most is his button-down shirt. I follow the length of his arms and rest on the edge of his shirt.

"I uh- I have lost my group," the man responds, promptly curtseying as he notices who I am.

The man holds his hand out, prompting me to shake his hand. I stare at the cufflinks on his button-down, intrigued by them. I would expect to see these sorts of cufflinks in vegas or at a place where card games are a fortay, not at a palace and on an ordinary man. One cufflink features a Jack, King, and Queen and the other cufflink features three Aces in a foldable card deck. They're not the ordinary cufflinks, perhaps he is some sort of magician, or he just really likes cards. Who knows?

"Do I pique your interest, Princess?"

I shake my head, letting go of his hand, "I've never seen those kinds of cufflinks."

The man nods his head, his eyes flicking down to his cufflinks, "You never know when you'll need an Ace up your sleeve," the man smiles, seeming mysterious but pleasant in the same manner, "I'll let you be, Princess. Can you direct me back to my crew?"

"You will not be able to get back into the Palace; I will take you," I respond, gesturing along the stone path before I begin to walk towards the palace. “I hope you didn’t touch or pick any flowers,” I comment, noticing the pollen stain at the edge of his white shirt. Of course, I expect children to want to touch and pick the flowers, but not a grown man.

The man shakes his head, and his eyes dart around. A clear indication is lying. I know he picked some of the Lillies; I can see precisely where he snatched them from. I don’t say anything; instead, I change the subject. "So, you got lost in the gardens?"

"Yes, I had stopped to check my phone; I have been expecting a call from a family member; I and when I looked back up, I was alone and standing in the middle of a garden," The man explains, "Quite embarrassing to get lost on a guided tour. I am surprised guards didn't cease me."

“I would be concerned about the gaggle of geese wandering around the fields. They get mean. I'd highly suggest for you not to lose your tour group," I half-smile, unsure of how the tour group left him behind, but it does happen. I remember one occasion where a little kid decided to play hide and seek within the palace. He snuck off from the tour and found himself in the dining hall. It was quite a chaotic mess. I am sure there was some sort of protocol to follow. Harry was the one who found the kid and called off the protocol. He didn't fully tell me about the day, but he briefly explained that it was hectic trying to lock half a palace down to find a lost tourist hiding amongst the furniture.

"I don't intend to. But, again, I am sorry for the inconvenience."

"It is okay," I shake my head, trying to be reassuring despite him trying to hide the fact he took a few Lillies.

Mistakes happen, it is easy to get lost at the palace, hence why there is a tour guide, but I assume I need to find a new guide since this group lost a man. I glide my fingers over the touch system that opens the doors through fingerprint and a unique key.

I push the door open and allow the man inside the palace, "Your tour group is right up there," I flick my head towards the small area at the end of the hallway. I can hear the tour guide talking about one room containing a magnificent array of paintings by Rubens, Van Dyck and Canaletto.

The man clears his throat and politely nods before hurrying down the hallway, where I watch him join the group of tourists who are more fascinated with the paintings than with me. A little girl notices me and waves. I smile and wave back.

I watch the small group for a while, mainly watching the man who seems to settle into the group and fit in. I smile to myself, happy to have helped a lost soul wandering the palace before I turn around. I gasp and put my hand over my chest, "Christ, you can't do that," I sigh, catching my breath as Harry stands in front of me with barely an inch of space between us, "Any closer and you'd have been on top of me." I press my hands to his chest.

"Have I not taught you to be aware of your surroundings?"

"I was," I respond, clearly lying. I know exactly what he is going to allude to. If I were aware of my surroundings, I would have been aware of how close he was to me. I already know he is going to give me hell about it.

Harry gently takes my hand and glances around, making sure nobody can see us before he opens a secret door, and we step into a different room. He closes the door, and I lean on the wall, taking a few deep breaths to bring my heart rate back down. "You alright?" Harry kisses my forehead before giving me a soft smile.

"No, you about gave me a heart attack," I respond, slapping his arm lightly, "One of these days, I will do the same to you."

"You give me heart attacks daily," Harry murmurs, his hands dropping to my side and resting on my waist. "In all seriousness, you need to be more aware, Anna. I could have been a murderer."

"That is what I have you for, to fight off murderers." I smile up at him.

Harry rolls his eyes, "You don't make my job easy, that is for sure," Harry chuckles.

"Mhm," I hum, "So why were you hovering so close? What do I owe this visit?" I request. Harry benevolently pulls me closer, and I settle into his warm embrace, feeling at ease for the first time in a few days.

"When I saw that you kicked Oliver off your service, I figured you were at your witts ends."

I rest my cheek on his chest and let out a breath, his arms tightening around me and holding me in the silence.

For the first time in a while, silence feels like a treasured moment. Nobody is requesting me, nobody telling me what to do or how to do it, nobody calling my name or needing me to be Queen. For the first time in a while, I can breathe and enjoy the silence without feeling the excessive need to cry or have a panic attack.

Oliver seems to always cop the shity end of the stick with me. He has from the moment he was on my service the first time. Earlier, my emotions got the better of me. I couldn't take it anymore and needed time alone. Nobody understood that I needed to compose myself. Everyone was suffocating me. When I managed to escape the chaos of everyone, Oliver was on my tail, following me everywhere. I couldn't take it. I needed utter silence and alone time. This time, I didn't threaten to fire him. I simply told him he wasn't on my service and to leave. Surprisingly, he listened to me.

"You can't kick him off your service."

"I needed space," I respond, lifting my head from his chest and stretching away from his embrace. "You don't get it," I mutter, turning my back towards him. I swallow hard and look up at the ceiling, doing my best not to allow the tears to fall from my eyes that are welling up.

Harry stays silent for a minute before he clears his throat, "Anastasia, sweetheart, do you want to talk about it?"

I don't respond. I stare at the wall and wipe my tears away, not wanting him to see me cry over everything. I am stronger than this. I don't cry when I can't do things.

The flooring creeks and Harry's shoes sound against the floors before his hands are on my waist again, "Anna," Harry whispers, tenderly tugging my waist and turning me to face him. Before he can do or say anything, I bury myself into his chest, still not wanting him to see me cry. He has seen me cry so many times in the last few months, and I am tired of it. I am tired of crying and feeling everything at once to feeling nothing. There is no in-between when it comes to how I feel. I am either all there, or I am not.

Harry holds me close, his arm tightly around me as his hand rubs circles on my back, "Okay," he whispers, trying to comfort me soothingly. "The other night, I was so tired, frustrated and stressed that I fired one of the security guys, and I got enraged at Matthew to feel better. We argued for a good thirty minutes before we stopped, and he just laughed."

"What?" I sniffle, surprised to be hearing of such a thing. It is rare to see Harry lose his shit on people, perhaps I am not around when it happens, but I don’t hear or see this side of him.

"Yeah, I lost my shit the other night. It happens, Anna. It happens to all of us, and it's okay to lose your shit and let it out. It is okay to want time alone and to cry. You don't need to hide it, especially from me."

"I'm tired of crying, Harry."

"It's part of the grieving process… But everyone has their moments, some more than others. Anastasia," Harry trails off, his hand moving to force me to look at him. Instead of fighting him like initially planned, I look up at him, "Life isn't easy, especially yours, but it will be okay."

"I'm the only one not okay."

Harry shakes his head, "No, you're not. Your mother cries too."

"Only seen her cry twice, the hospital and the funeral."

Harry takes a breath, his eyes softening as he opens his mouth to speak, but he stops himself. Harry bites his lip, pondering his thoughts and what to say. I cock my head to the side, unsure of how to read him or what his thoughts are. "Anna, sometimes things aren't always as they appear."

"What do you mean?"

"I have to get back to work," Harry dismisses the conversation, his hand raising to wipe away my tears, "I have to put a plan in place for your first event as Queen; I will be done in a few hours, do you want to go out for dinner?"

"Like leaving the palace?"

Harry nods his head, "Yes, you haven't left since coronation day, and I think you need to have some sort of normalcy."

I nod my head and smile at him, "I would like that a lot," I agree.

Honestly, since my father's passing, I haven't left the palace much or at all unless for royal events. I haven't felt the desire to go out and be in public, nor have I been allowed. Security is always high, and I am always on a high-risk alert. I have become accustomed to the high-risk level threat and haven't even asked to go out. I figured at some point. Someone would be released into the world where I could be normal for a few minutes.

"Be ready to leave at six; Matthew will take you to my car." Harry leans down and kisses my lips lightly, "And keep an eye on your surroundings," Harry winks, wiping my cheek with the pad of his thumb one more time. "Oliver is back on your service, but he will keep his distance, okay?"

I agree, "Okay," I respond before he walks back out through the secret door where he steps back into the initial hallway, and I sojourn in the room he brought me into. I walk across the red carpet and take a seat in the leather chair. I slip off my heels and lift my legs onto the leather chair, tucking them under me before I place my arms on the armrest.

Oliver walks in offers me a small smile, "Permission to enter?"

“Smartass," I mutter with a slight chuckle, "I'm sorry, Oliver."

"It's okay, Her highness."

"Is it okay if you make sure nobody comes in here?" I question, "I would like some time alone," I softly instruct, resting my head on my arms.

"As you wish," Oliver agrees, exercising towards the door and stepping out, leaving me alone in a room where very few will find me.

[boymeetsweevil]

Masterlist

who says i love you first

Non-Idol AU, established relationship AU, 1336w Your tiny existential crisis + Namjoon during bedtime

welcome to my channel (KNJ)

Non-Idol AU, Youtuber!Reader, 659w “5k Sub! Unisex Brow Grooming Tutorial feat. Joon :)”

baby genius**

Non-Idol AU, established relationship AU, ~2300w “In which you’re very smart and Namjoon has a tiny garter belt fetish”

dead man sells no toes**

Witch!Reader, Halloweentown AU, ~5200w “Your thoughts have a mind of their own when it comes to the cute delivery human with the mysterious tattoos”

call me maybe*

Idol-AU (kinda), club meet-cute AU, ~6600w

At first you were just trying to get some free drinks out of some guy at the bar, but then it becomes a lot more

warm fuzzies*

Non-Idol AU, slice of life, ~6200w “In which Jjangu AND his owner, Kim Seokjin, fall for you”

welcome to my channel (KSJ)

Non-Idol AU, Youtuber!Reader, 1208w “Dyeing @Eat_Jin ‘s hair and avocado mask DIY :)))”

hell’s kitchen

Non-Idol AU, established relationship AU, ‘crack’, ~2200w “It’s Jin’s birthday and it’s a hot ass mess because you can’t keep a secret”

and wrapped your arms around my neck** (req)

established relationship AU, part vampire!Seokjin, pwp, ~2000w “Vamp!Jin if you squint and then close your eyes entirely, this is 90% just sex yall”

punch drunk love*

Non-Idol AU, friends to lovers, 1742w Emotional constipation means sometimes you have to beat emotions out. Or, in this case, finger-flick them out.

welcome to my channel (MYG)

Non-Idol AU, Youtuber!Reader, 626w “New M.A.C lip tints feat. my roommate :)”

the min booty diaries** (req) - 0, 1, 2, 3, 4, 5

Idol AU, body/self-esteem issues

“Join Min Yoongi on his journey to becoming an ass man OR ~5 instances in which Yoongi realized he had a serious thing for your ass”

ode to wine

Idol AU, establised relationship AU, 900w

“A moment alone with Yoongi after the award show has come and gone”

off the deep end**

Mermaid!Yoongi, College AU, interspecies canoodling, a bit angsty, ~17,500w

“Your new mermaid friend, Yoongi, helps you navigate the treacherous waters of love, sex, and National Geographic.”

bump and grind*

Idol AU, BH employee!Reader, ~3000w

“If someone told you that months after getting hired by BigHit to translate and subtitle VLive videos you would be at an idol’s birthday party with your ass pressed firmly against Jung Hoseok’s crotch, you wouldn’t have believed them.”

welcome to my channel (JHS)

Non-Idol AU, Youtuber!Reader, 1164w

“Unisex nail care routine feat. Hobi and red wine ;)”

who’s your favorite**

Non-Idol AU, established relationship AU, misbehaving in a Chili’s, ~1400w

“If you ask the man himself, it takes a half a year of going to a shitty family restaurant after work on Fridays for Hoseok to become your favorite. In reality, though, he just didn’t get the joke. OR

‘I give you dick. Good dick!’”

cover you in constellations

Non-Idol AU, established relationship AU, 987w

“Happy birthday to Jung Hoseok, the most beautiful”

hoping for the best**

Non-Idol AU, Lifeguards!Reader and Hoseok, friends to enemies to friends to lovers, ~24,300w

“He knows you two are linked though. You must know it too. It’s impossible to deny when you both reach climax at the same time during your first time, the breath leaving him like you knocked it out and your eyes rolling into the back of your head like he scratched stars there for only you to see.”

sleeping bags (and other unconventional cures for insomnia) (req)

Non-Idol AU, College AU, enemies to more than friends, ~2500w

Based off the prompt “snowed in with your enemy at a ski resort”

watch yourself**

Non-Idol AU, Dressing room Attendant!Hoseok, exhibitionist!Hoseok, ~7770w

“It starts with an invitation from your ex. It ends with Hoseok’s hands down your pants in said ex’s kitchen”

mistletoe

Non-Idol AU, friends to lovers, Christmas AU?, ~3300w

“Jimin just can’t seem to get a moment alone with you at this christmas party, and you just can’t seem to stop baking…”

welcome to my channel (PJM)

Non-Idol AU, Youtuber!Reader, 1093w

“Drugstore Haul plus mini Sephora Haul and Surprise :)”

blue, not blanc** (req)

Non-Idol AU, established relationship AU, pwp, ~4500w

Based off the prompt: ‘can u do a jimin smut where he has a thing for panties’

me, you, and this thing we have between us** (req)

Non-Idol AU, established relationship AU, pwp, ~3700w

You’re pregnant and jimin is…happy about it

slippery slopes ahead** (req)

Non-Idol AU, College AU, established relationship AU, pwp, ~6600w

“‘Look at you,’ he coos. ‘All this time I thought you were shy.’”

childhood bestie (bullet)

Non-Idol Au, Childhood Besties!Reader and Taehyung, 943w

what it would be like if you and taehyung’s moms were bffs, so you and taehyung were bffs from birth

welcome to my channel (KTH)

Non-Idol AU, Youtuber!Reader, 667w

“Using Tom Ford Luna highlighters on my neighbor ;)”

a day in the life

Non-Idol AU, College AU, Roommates!Reader and Taehyung, slice of life, ~1900w

“A typical day living with Kim Taehyung consists of constant fights for the blanket and watching him steal your crop tops”

cougar** - 1, 2

Non-Idol AU, College AU, (slightly) Older!Reader, ~1400w + ~4700w

“…guys like him give off two very conflicting vibes. The first says ‘Wow, look at this handsome young man, I hope my kids are that beautiful’. The second says, ‘Wow, I want to have his kids’”

hectic halloween

Non-Idol AU, College AU, Best friends!Reader and Taehyung, language, ~1400w

Tae invites you to a Playboy™️ themed halloween party and a wardrobe malfuction of sorts occurs.

breathe you in** (req)

Popstar!Reader, Non-Idol!Taehyung, exes to lovers, ~7800w

Based on the prompt: Can I pls request an ex lovers trope with taehyung where you broke up with him , but he shows you he loves you and was never over you and wants to be together again? Thanks!

(welcome to) camp lonely heart**

Camp Counselors!Reader and Taehyung, fun with walkie talkies, friends to lovers, ~15,600w

It’s possible to find love in all sorts of places: In bars, in school, on apps. But what about through a walkie talkie?

heat index**

Non-Idol AU, established relationship AU, pwp, 2700w

“The town being in a heat wave puts Tae’s in a bit of a love drought. But even still, he makes do and (kind of) does you”

blood of the covenant* (to be rebooted) - 1, 2

Vampire!Reader, Human!Jungkook, College AU, Post-Apocalyptic(?) AU, 3476w+ ~3700w

“You’re an unregistered vampire trying your hardest to save up enough to go to school by working long hours and giving up meals. Unfortunately, the local university refuses to enroll starving vampires like yourself because they’re seen as threats. Desperate to get in, you take up Jeon Jungkook’s shady offer to help”

welcome to my channel (JJK)

Non-Idol AU, Youtuber!Reader, 1038w

“Cutting Men’s hair and talking about life feat. Kook :)”

blind!reader* (req)

Non-Idol AU, Blind!Reader, College AU, 4422w

Based off the prompt: Hi! I have a bts request! so the "prompt" is y/n were love at first sight for him, but y/n's life motto is "love is blind" because y/n is actually blind. this is just for fun, but I'd really like to read your take on it!! you can pick any of the boys. :)

for science**

Non-Idol AU, College AU, Nerd!Jungkook, very dramatic 

“Jungkook asks you to let him watch you get off. For science.”

The most magical place in hell (req)

Takes place somewhere after the events of FS, the gang goes on vacation...

bts as types of drunks

Non-Idol AU (?), the chaotic seven, 2073w

the seven chaotic drunks™️ embodied

bts as types of (weird) babies in your daycare

Pre-school teacher!Reader, Babies!BTS, 4610w

the seven chaotic babies™️ embodied

bts as types of boyfriends

Non-Idol AU (?), the chaotic seven, ~3295w

the seven chaotic boyfriends™️ embodied

sweetstupid moments with bts

Non-Idol AU (?), the chaotic seven, ~2054w

More boyfriend shenanigans

sleepovers with sleepy bts

Non-Idol AU (?), the chaotic seven, ~2109w

Even more boyfriend shenanigans

SS series (under construction)

* = suggestive, ~nsfw ** = smut, NSFW (req) = requested

and then there were two** (req)

Non-Idol AU, College AU, established relationship AU, ~3480w

Based on the prompt: “what do u think abt college bf mark and awkward and fumbling first time”

Sequel: and then there were finals**(req), 2k

Based on the prompt: “mark lee from nct! college au and NSFW. finding time in between studying for finals.”

in your court (req)

Non-Idol AU, College AU, clueless crushes and matchmaking, ~10,900w

Based on the prompt: “what about ,, bff!haechan trying to set taeil and his awkward ass up with oc Or awkward!oc with his basketball teammate jaehyun. Honestly anything with bff!haechan.”

binary stars (req)

Non-Idol AU, College AU, friends to lovers, ~8,400w

love sometimes takes the form of gravity

Based on the prompt: “bff!hyuck + friends to lovers. college au and slightly nsfw or however nsfw u wanna make it”

the shape you make**

Non-Idol AU, Halloweentown AU, ~4,100w

“For both you and Johnny, there is something big holding you back from being intimate. At the yearly Harvest party, that something big becomes something known.”

Part of the Intimacy Anthology Project!

* = suggestive, ~nsfw ** = smut, NSFW (req) = requested

[everything-laito]

Laito Sakamaki and His Relationships with the Sakamaki Family: an Anthology (more like biggo rant)

DaYUM; I’ve accidentally let these pile up in my ask box, so I will answer all of these in one post… Prepare for a huuuuge rant under the cut! Also thank you so much @hotline-to-hell​, you’re so lovely and supportive as usual, and thanks sm for contributing, same goes for you, anons!! Let’s break this up into parts tho… and start with the biggest one yet: Laito and Ayato’s relationship. 

I swear this is like an anthology,,,,, biggo rant under the cut!

Laito’s relationships with Ayato

I regularly call Ayato and Laito “double trouble.” This is because they’re usually found as a pair when some ultra-harassing is being planned. Despite Ayato sometimes visibly being uncomfortable as a result of Laito’s antics, he’s the one that gets along with him the most. The reason why Ayato has resentment for Laito seems to be that Laito wouldn’t help Ayato when they were kids; and Laito would be a bystander. Ayato was also a bystander in the Laito situation too. A very heartfelt moment occurs at the end of Ayato and Laito’s VS CD: [9/28/21: UPDATED TRANSLATION; THIS ONE’S MORE CORRECT]

Laito: You see, I often thought about why I was the person I was. Or why I couldn’t be like you or Kanato-kun instead? That’s why I hate you…I loathe how you feign ignorance when you actually know exactly what’s going on. And above all…I’m envious of how you can be so honest and upright about everything. …I know I can never be like that. I’ve been ruined by that woman. I’m not hiding my feelings either. They’ve simply been erased from within me. …Haha. Ayato: I hate you too. You’re never honest…I mean, if only you had asked for my help at some point, I would haveーーI knew you were putting up a tough facade the whole time. …However, as much as I admired you for your strength, it also pissed me off at the same time. I couldn’t forgive you.

(First of all this confirms that Laito didn’t like what Cordelia did to him; it was forced emotion on this end, thus creating a facade. I think I went over this in my Hilde analysis a little bit through the context of Hilde’s situation). Laito feels like he is permanently soiled and cannot move past this situation, and that’s terrible. However I should do a separate analysis on this drama CD. (I was going to put this in another analysis I think but then took it out last minute) 

Second of all, I believe that what Ayato means by that Laito’s “not honest” is that he knows Laito has a facade [with updated translation: this is confirmed]. Aka having a facade does not make you honest. I mean, he’s known Laito throughout his whole life; and Ayato is decently observant. He also obviously hangs around with Laito more often than his other brothers, (and vise versa) so it makes sense that Ayato would know something was up. He just has a vendetta against Laito because Laito would avoid conflict [UPDATED:] and the fact that Laito didn’t come to him. 

----------------UPDATED ANALYSIS 9/28/21----------------

The fact that Ayato sees Laito being strong is,,,,, so sweet and very accurate. Laito is defnitely strong and Ayato being like “if only you’d ask for my help”––GOD THIS BREAKS MY HEART AAAAA but Laito wasn’t honest with Ayato especially when they were kids because Laito probably didn’t know how to vocalize what was happening between him and Cordelia. And on top of that, there was no emotional stability in the triplet’s lives, so Laito felt like he needed to take it upon himself in order to to try his best to protect Ayato and Kanato. Obviously, this made Ayato feel bad because he wanted Laito to come to him too, and be there for Laito like how Laito was there for him. Sure Laito couldn’t do much when they were children, but he tried his best with what he was able to do. Ayato can’t forgive Laito for doing this to himself and pushing all his emotions down just so he could be there for Ayato and Kanato. It makes sense why Ayato was pissed off by this, yet grateful at the same time.

And Laito being absolutely self aware with his own lack of honesty just,,,, gives me the feels. But Laito calling out Ayato for feigning ignorance also makes sense too. Ayato knew about the whole Cordelia thing with Laito, and yet never reached out with that. I mean, I’m not sure what Ayato could have done at that point since it happened when they were older (at least the first time Cordelia sexually abused him––I know things happened when Laito was a child but I think he was more groomed as a kid in my opinion and from my deductions) and Ayato and Laito were drifting at this point.

Ok now that’s my updated part of this analysis, this was a pretty old one and I just had new thoughts and found a better translation.

---------------------------UPDATE END-------------------

Remember the whole thing I said in Laito and Shin’s VERSUS CD analysis was that Laito hates conflict and runs from his problems. It’s probably a defense mechanism of his but it’s honestly done more harm than solve it. This caused Ayato to kind of be stronger for himself, since he couldn’t get that strength from Laito. So that’s really sad, and answers the question whether or not any of his brothers know about his mask. But I believe it might just be Ayato, and I will get to that in a minute. It also answers Laito and Ayato’s love/hate relationship. 

I think that Ayato is more scared of Laito in the sense that he’s concerned about what’s he’s become. Like Ayato is always down to clown with Laito, and then Laito says some really weird shit sometimes that makes Ayato be like “oh god why”. I know I mentioned this but it is something to emphasize. I do think that Ayato knows that Laito is calculating, cunning, and manipulative as all hell. I don’t think he’s scared of him, or else why would he choose to hang out with Laito? Laito has nothing to gain by forcing Ayato to clown with him.  Ayato usually doesn’t let Laito mess around with him if Ayato’s already got it going with another person; in this case, Yui. Their interactions within Vandead Carnival and Lunatic Parade is more like “omg Laito don’t embarrass me in front of Yui” (which,,, Laito does, and tells Yui that he’s so superstitious that he sleeps with a belly warmer lol just so Ayato can exchange something embarrassing too). I’d say they have the most “brotherly” relationship out of all the Sakamakis (rivals Subaru’s and Shuu’s relationship but that’s really an unspoken one).

Despite them being closer than the rest, that doesn’t mean they’re the closest pair. Laito still feels the need to prove himself that he doesn’t have his emotional problems in front of Ayato still, which is also probably why it drives Ayato away. Ayato can’t comfort Laito usually considering his facade builds a wall. And it’s hard to get to someone’s heart when it’s reinforced with steel, basically. So yes, he still wears his facade around Ayato; considering it only seems that they hang out when they’re horny and want some fun lol. I haven’t seen another instance where they do, or at least that’s the most common one. 

Laito’s relationship with Kanato

I finished Kanato’s HDB route a while back, and I just gotta say,,,, man,,,,, wow,,,,, that was quite the doozy. As for him and Laito? It’s quite hard to tell, but, Laito is still there for Kanato. Sure Laito’s there when Ayato harasses him and calls him “hysteric” but Laito never insults him. There’s even a point where Laito plays a “big brother” role and gives Kanato advice: 

Laito: Fufu~ Kanato-kun, shall I give you a little warning? Kanato: I don’t need such a thing. Laito: Don’t say that and just listen~ …If you take your sweet time, she’ll get snatched away from underneath your eyes, you know? Kanato: …

Sure it’s kinda…. morbid advice, but it is advice that helps Kanato regardless. And Kanato takes it! He listened to Laito! It’s obvious that Kanato is really annoyed by Laito (which gives me a reason why he doesn’t know about Laito’s situation with Cordelia on top of Laito’s facade) and doesn’t want anything to do with him (or Ayato, for that matter). I believe he says at one point in his route how he was isolated from the other siblings, mainly due to Cordelia. However, since Kanato listened to Laito despite him saying “I don’t need such a thing” kinda implies some kind of respect for Laito. He might know that Laito is calculating and smart in that manner. But do I think that he caught on to Laito wearing a facade all the time? Nah, he cares about himself too much and also just does his own stuff most of the time. 

This quote I’m adding also happens in Kanato’s route; it doesn’t add much but I did laugh a little reading this: 

Ayato: Does she like Kanato that much? That’s impossible. She’s heading down a path of despair for sure. Laito: Fufu…That’s something you could say about any one of us though~ Ayato: …Che.

It’s just a well crafted meta joke from Laito; he says it in such a cheerful way but man, that’s sad.

That’s about it for Laito and Kanato; I don’t think Laito says much about Kanato and vise versa. They really stay out of each others’ business, mainly because Kanato isolates himself out of spite, really. 

---------------------------------INTERMISSION------------------------------------

Before I move onto the other ones, just a little shoutout to my inspiration for this blog: @/akai-anemone 

I read her analyses on Laito about five years ago, and unfortunately, she has stopped. But, she has some really good stuff and I definitely recommend checking it out. Here’s some big bro Laito moments she’s brought up too: 

https://akai-anemone.tumblr.com/post/68549708275/heres-one-of-my-favorite-big-bro-laito-moments

https://akai-anemone.tumblr.com/post/68539626117/on-the-subject-of-the-relationship-between-the

https://akai-anemone.tumblr.com/post/65005954447/narihira-ayato-tells-laito-that-hes-building-a 

https://akai-anemone.tumblr.com/post/64621970821/big-bro-laito 

Please check her out!! She’s so lovely and although she’s not active anymore, I want to pay tribute to her too. I really hope I can be a good successor of her’s for the DL/Laito community. 

------------------------------INTERMISSION END---------------------------------

Laito’s relationship with Subaru

Honestly probably one of my favorite Sakamaki brother dynamics aside from Ayato and Laito. If you haven’t heard of the Laito vs Subaru, here it is for your listening pleasure (LINK). It’s probably one of my favorite fanservicey CDs, because Laito really just is getting the most out of the situation. 

Laito and Subaru are quite the dynamic duo. Subaru doesn’t have an affinity for Laito and man, it shows. He’s always telling Laito to shut up, and similarly to his other brothers, he’s always like “wtf” when Laito says something wack. Laito’s absolutely entertained by this though, and since he’s older than Subaru, he definitely uses it to his advantage to mess with him. Since Subaru’s your “tsundere” part of the group (more than Ayato), and easily read more than Ayato is, Laito has so much fun teasing him and calling him out in front of Yui. Here’s one of my favorite interactions from the CD:

L: Ehe~.. I’ll be taking those words as a compliment. Your jealousy is really a pleasant thing to me, ahaha. S: Ah?! JEALOUSY?! L: Oh? Aren’t you jealous? Extremely? Ufu, the reason Subaru-kun is so annoyed is that.. S: Fuck that! There’s no way it’s that! Don’t make me laugh!! It’s not like I… to this girl… L: Mm, tsk tsk tsk. Subaru-kun isn’t very honest, is he. What I said is the truth. You’re– S: SHUT UP! *breaks something* L: Woah! Geez… when I hit the nail on the head every time I’d like it if you didn’t break the things around us. Look, bitch-chan is also scared, isn’t she? Am I right? 

Laito, the perceptive motherfucker (,,,,dark joke im sorry), is back at it again, but terrorizing Subaru (and indirectly terrorizing the infrastructure of the house lol). I think it’s another brotherly moment of him to kind of make Subaru realize his feelings too. I don’t know too much about Subaru (although his MB route made me cry lol) but I do know that he’s just a fiercely independent guy that also kinda self isolated himself similarly to Kanato; but doesn’t nearly have as much built up hatred to his siblings. 

 Here’s some more Laito messing with Subaru quotes from that CD. Mainly because I find it so entertaining. 

L: Uwa.. Subaru-kun is scary~ dragging along a senseless girl by her hair. S: SHUT UP PERVERT!.. Right now as you wish.. I’ll make this girl crumble… everything is working out like you desired, right? L: Ufu, really? I did it! In that case, why don’t I stay here and watch your excellent ideas slowly and carefully?

Laito: Fufufu~ You just don’t understand the depths of love yet, Subaru-kun~ Laito: …Well then, Bitch-chan…Doesn’t seem like anyone will come and save us any time soon, so let’s have lots and lots more fun, okay? Haahn…Mm… Subaru: The fuck’s the ‘depths of love’!? I don’t care if I don’t understand that crap. I’ll love you…in my own way. So brace yourself, okay? …Mmh!

That’s so damn rich coming from Laito. This is just Laito’s version of a “haha virgin” joke (which I don’t think Subaru is lol). However, it seems that Laito considers Subaru “pure,” similar in Ayato’s fashion. Maybe this statement is a little jealous quip at that. Who knows!

Laito’s relationship with Reiji

Laito and Reiji…. Man, this is an entertaining relationship. They’re seemingly opposites: agent of chaos and agent of order. (However, Subaru is more physically chaotic lol). Although Laito does kind of fill the “big bro” position for most of his brothers, Reiji is definitely more of a “parental” figure. Laito knows how to get under Reiji’s skin and just does it for fun. I just find it really entertaining. Sure I’m not the biggest Reiji fan like I’ve said before, but wow I love their interactions. Reiji can be a buzzkill for Laito, which certainly annoys him as well. Their relationships in the tokuten CDs are my favorite; especially when Kou and Laito pester Reiji to make them food. However, Reiji treats Laito like a nuisance as well, especially during his MB out when a desperate Laito comes to Reiji begging for help. Reiji’s extremely blunt in that situation and basically is like “why don’t you just kill her” and doesn’t attempt to comfort Laito when he’s crying when Yui kills herself in MB. I feel like Reiji is a nice foil for Laito’s character in their interactions, especially during that scene:

Reiji: Oh… …Are you crying? Laito: Eh, this… …is what you call tears? Reiji: The water that flows from the eyes are tears. Laito: Why am I crying for? Reiji: … … Are you happy or sad, it can be either. Laito: I’m… … Reiji: Well, please leave quickly and carry the corpse out with you. Laito: It’s cold… …I’m shedding so many tears, why are they coming out so fast… … Reiji: … … It would be the result of which you invited.

They don’t interact often, and when they do, it’s either entertaining or meaningful, it seems. At least in my opinion.

Laito’s relationship with Shuu

Now this one’s interesting. Exaggerated “pervert” vs actual pervert. Putting it out there, I don’t think Shuu’s a closet pervert as most say; he’s just quiet in general, but his perverse remarks are incredibly obvious. These two don’t interact often (although Shuu interacts with his brothers less than Kanato) but WOW can they freaking duet!! I love their song Camouflage. But, that aside, their reactions are limited to Shuu making quips at Laito; either telling him to shut up or like “wtf Laito” (similarly to his other brothers). My favorite scene of them both is when Shuu calls Laito a “wannabe pervert”. 

Laito: Haha. Shu, isn’t it unusual for you to feel uneasy? Are you jealous? Fufu… … Shu: Bothersome… …I’m in a bad mood now. My music is spoiled because of your useless chattering. … … As for the concept of jealousy, it’s impossible for me to express… …you imitated pervert. Laito: … … Do you want to be killed? Shu: Hmph… …whatever you like?

This sets Laito off a bit, and Shuu definitely knows what he’s doing. Laito’s even taken aback, given his pause and the lack of a retort. It’s uncertain to see if Shuu actually knows what’s up with Laito or not, but I do think that Shuu is more perceptive than what he lets on. This also just reinforces the fact that Laito wants to meticulously build his character/facade as the perverted type, and doesn’t want it to be broken down; which is why he gets mad at Shuu. 

Well that’s all of Laito’s relationships with his brothers! Now onto the bigger picture.

Laito’s overall relationship with the Sakamakis and their implications + conclusions

This one’s gonna be a bit all over the place, so I apologize for that. 

Have you ever noticed that Laito doesn’t resort to name calling like the rest of his brothers? Even Reiji, the more “””refined””” brother calls Shuu a good for nothing. He only resorts to name-calling women. This, I find very intriguing. He usually has more indirect comments at his brothers, but they’re not nearly as malicious as the others. Or they’re insightful or just him teasing them; I don’t believe he has malicious intent towards his brothers like he says he does. Unless if he says he does; Laito doesn’t get actually LEGIT mad that easily. 

Also, yes, Laito does keep his mask on around his siblings. He’s just not as pervy when Yui’s not there because,,,, Yui’s not there, or if she’s not the topic of the conversation (or any woman for that matter), he has no reason to be pervy unless if something comes up. He always feels the need to be pervy though; Shuu straight up calls him a “wannabe pervert,” since Laito heavily exerts it to the point where it’s probably a joke. 

However, there’s something that’s been bothering me. I did mention it in this (https://everything-laito.tumblr.com/post/624910343406256128/impromptu-analysis-more-of-this-coming-soon) analysis, but TLDR; Nobody interacts with you or Laito in Laito’s HDB route. I could even say the same with his MB route, but that highlights his rivalry with Kou. In HDB, there is rarely any interaction with other brothers or even implied interaction with them. Subaru doesn’t even show up in the entirety of Laito’s route from what I can remember. In Kanato’s route, (which Kanato is the most overtly possessive/yandere of them all imo) Laito and Ayato still interact with him when you’re around, or even when he’s not around. But nobody dares to interact with you in Laito’s route much when you’re alone. Its bone chilling isolation. If there is interaction with the other brothers, it’s very limited and very quick. They’re very careful about what they say to you, when Laito’s around or not. They know he’s always watching, and we know he’s always watching. 

But, Kanato’s the one that spits out death threats all the time and is definitely like “Yui’s mine” in his route. But, it seems that he’s not much of a threat to the other brothers; and like I mentioned, Laito even gives him advice, which he listens to. However, nobody dares to get under Laito’s radar, because it seems that he can turn into an actual threat to the others. I mean, Laito probably has killed as many people as Kanato, if not more. Laito is no stranger to killing in cold blood. He’s killed so many suitors under Cordelia. This is beyond the other brothers being disgusted with Laito’s actions. This is the other brothers not wanting to mess with Pandora’s Box. 

Sure, we know that Laito dislikes outward violence, but he’s a master at manipulation and gaslighting, and doing stuff sneakily. They don’t know what to expect because of his mask being on at all times; they can’t get an efficient read on him, and even if they were “plotting” something against him or wanting to take Yui, they couldn’t. He has eyes everywhere. So instead, the other brothers avoid him in the sacrificial bride situation. He’s a force to be reckoned with, and they seem to know that he’s smarter than what he lets on. 

Well, if you’re still here, thanks for reading as always! So sorry this has been so delayed! (And Hotline, I will get to your other part of your ask in another post, I didn’t forget about it!!)

Hope you all are doing well!

-Corn

[shinidamachu]

You know what’s sad? I didn’t care for S*ssRin before Yashahime. I didn’t like it but I didn’t hate it. It’s these recent posts where people try to justify this ship with literal grooming tactics that’s seriously grossing me out. 😬

Hey there!

Yeah, I see where you’re coming from and even though I had a different experience, yours is totally understandable. In fact, many people in the fandom are in the same boat as you.

Personally, I first watched the anime when I was a little kid. Like, really young. I didn’t get to finish it then, probably because the TV channel stopped airing it or something like that. Growing up, the story was still on the back of my mind, but Inuyasha, Kagome and their romance were the only things I could remember. As an adult, I finally decided to rewatch the whole thing, start to finish.

That’s when I took notice of the other key characters, such as $esshomaru and R!n, that my young mind had forgotten. Because she was a child, it never occured to me to interpret their bond as romantic. And because he was her guardian, exerted authority over her from the moment they met and their relationship was strictly platonic during the whole show, I couldn’t help but see them as a Lilo & Stitch family: little and broken, but still good.

However, years and years of fandom had prepared me to the real possibility of  $esshomaru/R!n being a ship. My fears were confirmed when I joined Inutumblr. Was I still grossed out? Absolutely. But I couldn’t say I was surprised. As much as it hurts to say, the misogynist trope $esshomaru/R!n is based on is not unusual.

And so I hated this ship since I learned it was a thing. Hated its disgusting implications, hated that it defilled such a pure, familial form of unconditional love, hated how cheap and superficial it is. Hated how it strips R!n out of any agency whatsoever, hated that it downplays $esshomaru’s character development and it makes him out to be an absolute creep.

That’s why I did my level best to avoid interacting with shippers as much as I could. I can make friends with them, if they’re not invested in it enough to put it on my dash. And as much as it still makes me uncomfortable, I can look the other way if I’m reading Inukag fanfiction and these characters are portrayed as a couple, as long as they met when she was an adult and they’re not a huge part of it. It's not of my business what people ship, regardless of how unbelievably inappropriate and problematic I find it to be. They stayed in their lane. I stayed in mine. We lived in peace.

Until the sequel attacked and changed everything like some kind of Fire Nation shit.

You probably didn’t care about $essr!n because you didn’t have to. Inuyasha ended and it was a very definitive ending. We had our interpretation of what the finale represented for $essr!n. Shippers had their totally different idea. But there was no point in discussing it because nothing would change regarding the story. We were given what we were given and that was that. 

Or so we thought.

Suddenly Sunrise comes along with a sequel, in which $esshomaru had daughters. This statement brought brand new information that effectively shoots down one of the interpretations above: all Sunrise has to do is reveal the mother.

The thing is: if the “$esshomaru and R!n were family” interpretation is the one Yashah!me debunks, it means Sunrise is going to portray in a good light a relationship in which a grown man met a 8 years old child, protected her, gave her gifts, exerted authority over her, established himself as an adult she could trust after all the trauma she went through... only to impregnate her when she was old enough to bear his children. It also means Rumiko Takahashi allowed them to do so.

From this point on, it was impossible for me not to speak up against it. I couldn’t live with myself if I didn’t. It’s one thing for people to make fanarts and write fanfiction about it. These things can be tagged, filtered, searched for or avoided. Other completely different is the studio that owns Inuyasha turning the ship into official content and addressing it to children. 

To make matters worse, some shippers reacted to more that valid criticism by harassing people online and trying to justify why $essr!n is okay when it clearly isn’t. If you’re down with a problematic ship, that’s a you problem. You’re an adult. When you advocate for said ship to be represented in official children media, denying or knowing exactly how harmful it is to the children who are too young to have the same critical skills as you, that’s when I get vocal against it.

And I will be vocal because there are people out there actually believing the absurds some shippers say to try and normalize $essr!n, going as far as comparing it with perfectly acceptable ships or straight up creating their own “facts” to twist canon in their favor. I will be vocal because some of its supporters only ships it because a part of the fandom does it and never really thought about it. I will be vocal because I want this terrible trope to die. It’s more than enough time to kill it, in Inuyasha or any other TV show out there. We know better now. Let’s do better.

As for the shippers, I’m more than happy to ignore their existence, but it seems they are shooting themselves in the foot with how loud and obnoxious they are getting, especially after the infamous last preview, managing to annoy even the people who were staying out of it, such as yourself, anon. At least that’s what it looks like, here from my little bubble.

I’m sorry this whole thing makes you sad, pal. It makes me sad too. And I know if worse comes to worst, it will be hard for some of us to separate the sequel from the original, especially if you’re a $esshomaru stan, because it will be almost impossible to “escape” the damn thing, but hear me out: 

R!n can be the mother of the twins or not. However it goes, you don’t have to consider Yashah!me canon at all. I sure as hell won’t.

[rockislandadultreads]

Non-fiction titles about Serial Killers, for any murderino

The Kill Jar: Obsession, Descent, and a Hunt for Detroit's Most Notorious Serial Killer by J. Reuben Appelman

Four children were abducted and murdered outside of Detroit during the winters of 1976 and 1977, their bodies eventually dumped in snow banks around the city. J. Reuben Appelman was six years old at the time the murders began and had evaded an abduction attempt during that same period, fueling a lifelong obsession with what became known as the Oakland County Child Killings. Autopsies showed the victims to have been fed while in captivity, reportedly held with care. And yet, with equal care, their bodies had allegedly been groomed post-mortem, scrubbed-free of evidence that might link to a killer. There were few credible leads, and equally few credible suspects. That’s what the cops had passed down to the press, and that’s what the city of Detroit, and J. Reuben Appelman, had come to believe. When the abductions mysteriously stopped, a task force operating on one of the largest manhunt budgets in history shut down without an arrest. Although no more murders occurred, Detroit and its environs remained haunted. The killer had, presumably, not been caught. Eerily overlaid upon the author’s own decades-old history with violence, The Kill Jar tells the gripping story of J. Reuben Appelman’s ten-year investigation into buried leads, apparent police cover-ups of evidence, con-men, child pornography rings, and high-level corruption saturating Detroit’s most notorious serial killer case.

Death in the Air: The True Story of a Serial Killer, the Great London Smog, and the Strangling of a City by Kate Winkler Dawson

London was still recovering from the devastation of World War II when another disaster hit: for five long days in December 1952, a killer smog held the city firmly in its grip and refused to let go. Day became night, mass transit ground to a halt, criminals roamed the streets, and some 12,000 people died from the poisonous air. But in the chaotic aftermath, another killer was stalking the streets, using the fog as a cloak for his crimes. All across London, women were going missing--poor women, forgotten women. Their disappearances caused little alarm, but each of them had one thing in common: they had the misfortune of meeting a quiet, unassuming man, John Reginald Christie, who invited them back to his decrepit Notting Hill flat during that dark winter. They never left. The eventual arrest of the "Beast of Rillington Place" caused a media frenzy: were there more bodies buried in the walls, under the floorboards, in the back garden of this house of horrors? Was it the fog that had caused Christie to suddenly snap? And what role had he played in the notorious double murder that had happened in that same apartment building not three years before--a murder for which another, possibly innocent, man was sent to the gallows? The Great Smog of 1952 remains the deadliest air pollution disaster in world history, and John Reginald Christie is still one of the most unfathomable serial killers of modern times. Journalist Kate Winkler Dawson braids these strands together into a taut, compulsively readable true crime thriller about a man who changed the fate of the death penalty in the UK, and an environmental catastrophe with implications that still echo today.

Hell's Princess: The Mystery of Belle Gunness, Butcher of Men by Harold Schechter

In the pantheon of serial killers, Belle Gunness stands alone. She was the rarest of female psychopaths, a woman who engaged in wholesale slaughter, partly out of greed but mostly for the sheer joy of it. Between 1902 and 1908, she lured a succession of unsuspecting victims to her Indiana “murder farm.” Some were hired hands. Others were well-to-do bachelors. All of them vanished without a trace. When their bodies were dug up, they hadn’t merely been poisoned, like victims of other female killers. They’d been butchered.

Hell’s Princess is a riveting account of one of the most sensational killing sprees in the annals of American crime: the shocking series of murders committed by the woman who came to be known as Lady Bluebeard. The only definitive book on this notorious case and the first to reveal previously unknown information about its subject, Harold Schechter’s gripping, suspenseful narrative has all the elements of a classic mystery—and all the gruesome twists of a nightmare.

Mad City: The True Story of the Campus Murders That America Forgot by Michael Arntfield

In fall 1967, friends Linda Tomaszewski and Christine Rothschild are freshmen at the University of Wisconsin. The students in the hippie college town of Madison are letting down their hair—and their guards. But amid the peace rallies lurks a killer.

When Christine’s body is found, her murder sends shockwaves across college campuses, and the Age of Aquarius gives way to a decade of terror.

Linda knows the killer, but when police ignore her pleas, he slips away. For the next forty years, Linda embarks on a cross-country quest to find him. When she discovers a book written by the murderer’s mother, she learns Christine was not his first victim—or his last. The slayings continue, and a single perpetrator emerges: the Capital City Killer. As police focus on this new lead, Linda receives a disturbing note from the madman himself. Can she stop him before he kills again?

Lady Killers: Deadly Women Throughout History by Tori Telfer

When you think of serial killers throughout history, the names that come to mind are likely Jack the Ripper, John Wayne Gacy, and Ted Bundy. But what about Tillie Klimek, Moulay Hassan, and Kate Bender? The narrative we're comfortable with is one where women are the victims of violent crime-not the perpetrators. In fact, serial killers are thought to be so universally male that, in 1998, FBI profiler Roy Hazelwood infamously declared that There are no female serial killers. Inspired by Telfer's Jezebel column of the same name, Lady Killers disputes that claim and offers fourteen gruesome examples as evidence. Although largely forgotten by history, female serial killers rival their male counterparts in cunning, cruelty, and appetite. Each chapter explores the crimes and history of a different female serial killer and then proceeds to unpack her legacy and her portrayal in the media as well as the stereotypes and sexist cliches that inevitably surround her. When you think of serial killers throughout history, the names that come to mind are likely Jack the Ripper, John Wayne Gacy, and Ted Bundy. But what about Tillie Klimek, Moulay Hassan, and Kate Bender? The narrative we're comfortable with is one where women are the victims of violent crime-not the perpetrators. In fact, serial killers are thought to be so universally male that, in 1998, FBI profiler Roy Hazelwood infamously declared that There are no female serial killers. Inspired by Telfer's Jezebel column of the same name, Lady Killers disputes that claim and offers fourteen gruesome examples as evidence. Although largely forgotten by history, female serial killers rival their male counterparts in cunning, cruelty, and appetite. Each chapter explores the crimes and history of a different female serial killer and then proceeds to unpack her legacy and her portrayal in the media as well as the stereotypes and sexist cliches that inevitably surround her.

The Spider and the Fly: A Reporter, a Serial Killer, and the Meaning of Murder by Claudia Rowe

In September 1998, young reporter Claudia Rowe was working as a stringer for the New York Times in Poughkeepsie, New York, when local police discovered the bodies of eight women stashed in the attic and basement of the small colonial home that Kendall Francois, a painfully polite twenty-seven-year-old community college student, shared with his parents and sister. Growing up amid the safe, bourgeois affluence of New York City, Rowe had always been secretly fascinated by the darkness, and soon became obsessed with the story and with Francois. She was consumed with the desire to understand just how a man could abduct and strangle eight women—and how a family could live for two years, seemingly unaware, in a house with the victims’ rotting corpses. She also hoped to uncover what humanity, if any, a murderer could maintain in the wake of such monstrous evil. Reaching out after Francois was arrested, Rowe and the serial killer began a dizzying four-year conversation about cruelty, compassion, and control; an unusual and provocative relationship that would eventually lead her to the abyss, forcing her to clearly see herself and her own past—and why she was drawn to danger.

[thorne93]

Inside the Criminal Mind (Part 10)

Prompt: You’re married to Dr. Spencer Reid of the BAU, and are a distinguished doctor yourself on the team. You’re sent down to Miami, Florida for teaching and as a side request from the FBI, to investigate a string of missing persons. When you think you’ve figured out who the unsub is, your life becomes more complicated than you ever could’ve imagined.

Word Count: 2922

Warnings: (throughout the fic –>) death, blood, gore, killings, language, disturbing mental notions, mentions of rapes/murder/etc (You know, Dexter and Criminal Minds related business)

Notes: Thank you so much to @arrow-guy​​​​, @carryonmyswansong​​​​​, and @mrs-dragneel-stark-solo​​​​​ - without each of you, I couldn’t have finished, written, or properly navigated this story. Each of you helped me fish out details that were incredibly important to me. Beta’d by @carryonmyswansong​​​​​ and @mrs-dragneel-stark-solo​​​​​… Aesthetic by @mrs-dragneel-stark-solo​​​​​

This is a crossover of Criminal Minds x Dexter. First time writing Dexter.

Also, the timeline is after Season 1 of Dexter, but during season 14-ish of Criminal minds into Season 15. Enjoy!!!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

You didn’t mention Dexter at all to Spencer, and he didn’t text you while you were there, thankfully. You didn’t see the team again, but you and Spence tried to make the most of your few hours together and you were jetsetting off back to Miami again. 

That night, you asked Dexter if you could come over.

“Would you want to order pizza? I brought beers.” 

You held up the evidence with a half grin.

“Uh, sure. I don’t really have anything for us to do tonight though so…”

“That’s okay. We can just sit and chat,” you said with a smile, walking into his apartment. 

He closed the door behind you. 

“Am I missing something here?” he asked.

You were already on his couch when you looked up at him, smiling. You shook your head. “No? You’re not missing anything. I just thought we could hang out.” 

“You just want to...hang out? No stalking, no lessons, nothing?”

You shrugged. “Dex, believe it or not, I enjoy your company.” 

“You… do?” he wondered as he came over and sat on the other end of the couch.

“I do,” you assured. 

“Odd friends to have.” 

You rolled your eyes. “You really need to get over that,” you said, reaching towards one of the beers. 

“Over what?”

“The whole ‘I’m a monster, fear me’.” You shook your head and slightly laughed. “It’s getting pretty old.”

“But I am a monster. I kill people.”

“Bad people.”

“Whether or not they deserve it isn’t the issue, Y/N. If it wasn’t for Harry--”

“Yes, you’d be lost without your code and you’d kill innocent souls. But did it ever occur to you that maybe you aren’t a monster? Maybe Harry didn’t exactly tell you that you do have an off switch.” 

“My urges don’t have an off switch.” 

With a smirk you bobbed your head. “Oh yes, they do. You just have to listen to them.” 

“If I could control this, I would.” 

“Oh for fucks sakes, Dexter,” you said, rolling your head. “Do you hear yourself? You’re as pitiful as the people you kill. You can’t help yourself. You can’t control your urges. You can’t stop. It’s an addiction. Do you see that?” You put the unopened beer back down on the coffee table before leaning forward to face him. “I’m not saying it’s easy, but Harry tried to feed this… desire in you. He forgot to tell you that you control it, not the other way around.” 

“I wish you could tell that to my Dark Passenger,” he murmured. 

“I am. I’m telling you, and you can tell it.” 

“It’s not that easy, you know.” 

“Dexter, Bundy and Dahmer both expressed that they wanted to stop. In interviews, they didn’t say they were remorseful, they didn’t say they were sorry, they even said there was no cure out there for them. But you know what they did say? Looking back, they were glad they were caught.” 

“If that’s true, why are you doing it?” 

“They kill without purpose. I’ll be killing with a reason.” 

“So you think that I’m a good person, because I kill bad people and I can control this.”

“I think you’re not evil, like you try to say you are. In fact, I know you think you’re empty, that you don’t feel anything. But the truth is that you feel everything, but you crush it, because God knows if you felt something all Hell would break loose. That must’ve been something Harry instilled in you, hmm? That killers don’t feel, because if they did feel, they’d feel guilt, remorse, they wouldn’t do it again.” 

Without hesitation, he corrected you in an even voice, “I don’t feel.”

You narrowed your eyes at him. 

“You’re lying.” You stared him down for a moment, but he didn’t seem to be able to look you in the eyes. “I’m not trying to dishonor the memory of your adoptive-father. I’m glad you had him. He could’ve been cruel to you, sent you away, or make you a careless killer. But is it possible, that Harry maybe had his own agenda? That if he groomed you to be a vigilante, that if he told you not to feel, that you were some evil monster incapable of control or emotions that you could go one murdering without a second thought.”

“No, I know I don’t feel.” 

“And that’s why you drop everything to be there for Rita, for her kids. Why you killed your biological brother to protect your foster sister. Why you didn’t just kill me when I showed up at your doorstep over a month ago.” 

“You don’t know anything about me.”

“I’m not pretending to, Dexter.”

He made a quick face of frustration. “If this is some sick way of profiling then--”

“I’m not profiling either. I’m being your friend. I’m letting you know that, while I appreciate everything you’ve done for your community, that you can stop this at any time you want. No one is all evil, no one is all good. People all have their demons. Hell, you know that because you find it in plain sight. You find doctors killing patients. You find chef’s killing restaurant patrons. You find parents killing their kids. You’ve saved countless lives. To hell with who doesn’t agree.” 

“So what’s the point to all this?”

“The point is that I don’t like to see you wallow in undeserved self-hate or self-loathing for nothing. I want you to know you can control this, and be empowered.”

“Why? What do you get out of it?”

You scoffed and rolled your eyes. “A shiny nickel. What does it matter? You’re my friend. Maybe you don’t see me as your friend, maybe you still don’t even trust me. But I just thought you should know that not everyone sees you for the monster you think you are. When some people look behind the mask, they truly do see the beauty that lies beneath.” 

With that, you gave him a soft smile. 

------------------------

That night, you ended up spending it at Dexter’s. Accidentally. You two ordered pizza, drinking and having beers all night. You ended up crashing on the couch and Dex in his bed. 

Then his sister showed up for breakfast. 

“Dex?” she called out, knocking on the door. He came out and saw you and his eyes went wide. 

“Shit,” he muttered.

“I can hide if you want,” you offered, feeling oddly guilty about nothing. 

“No it’s--”

“Dexter!” she shouted. “Open the fucking door.” 

“God. Alright, Deb, don’t have an aneurysm.” 

Quickly, you jumped up and made yourself presentable. 

“LaGuerta is on my ass about--” she began, walking in with a bag and two coffees before she saw you in the living room. “What are you doing here? You’re that FBI chick.” 

“Yes, I’m Supervisory Special Agent Dr. Reid,” you said, reminding her of your status. 

“Why the fuck are you at my brother’s at seven in the morning?” she demanded. 

“We were watching the game and it got late,” Dexter suddenly said as he looked at you. 

She glanced between you two. 

“Are you fucking cheating on Rita? Because if you fuck that up, I will--”

“No one is cheating, Officer Morgan,” you assured. “I’m happily married. Dexter and I merely… hit it off during the interviews I conducted at your precinct. I reached out to him a few times for assistance and we’ve become friends.” 

This lying was getting a hell of a lot easier. Well maybe it only worked with people you weren’t married to. 

“So what, you two bonded over missing people?” she asked, crossing her arms. 

“Something like that,” you mused.

She eyed you up and down, then glanced back to her brother. “Alright, if you two aren’t having an affair then you wouldn’t mind her meeting Rita, right?” 

Dexter seemed to hesitate for just a second before he said, “Mind? Why would I mind?” 

“Great! So we’ll have one big family dinner and invite the Fed.” 

You nodded, a smile on your face. “Sounds great!” 

She nodded, and you could tell she still wasn’t buying the relationship. 

“Well you and I need to go,” she finally said. “Doakes is on you and LaGuerta is on me, so let’s chop chop.” 

You grabbed your bag and started to walk out. “I’ll see you two later. Just let me know when. Have a good one, you two. I’ve got to get to class.” 

With that, you slipped out and went down to your rental car, trying to breathe. This was going to be interesting. 

--------------------

At lunch time, you called Dexter.

“Hey,” you greeted quickly.

“Hey. So about dinner--”

“Yeah, I’m so sorry. I should’ve said I was busy. I just didn’t want to give her a reason to think we were hiding something, but I can make something up. I can tell her I’m swamped with work or something.”

“No, we might as well do this. If you back out now it’ll just send up more red flags.”

Silence hung between you two for a moment.

“I really am sorry. I know we were trying to keep this relationship quiet.”

“Well with as often as we are going to be around each other, it might be better if some of it is out in the open. Between Doakes on my ass and Deb and Rita, we were bound to be discovered with as much time as we’re spending together.” 

“That’s true. So you’re not mad?” 

“Why would I be mad?” he wondered, sounding genuinely curious.

“Didn’t want to ruin your master plan.”

“My master plan is still the same. Teach you to the best of my ability. That’s all. Everything else is just a speedbump.” 

You breathed a sigh of relief. “Well, good to hear that. See you at dinner, I suppose.”

“Yeah it’ll be tonight. Deb already called Rita and she’s getting dinner set up.” 

“Jesus, that was fast.”

“Yeah, you’re telling me.” 

“Well, we better get our work done early then.” 

----------------------------

Dexter texted you the address and you showed up promptly at 6:00 for dinner. 

You knocked on the door, nervous. You and Dex hadn’t exactly discussed what all Rita knew about him, or about your relationship with him. You just hoped you could go along with his cues and keep the conversation on things you could answer. 

Dexter answered the door, thankfully and you stepped inside. 

“Oh, you made it!” Deb announced and you smiled a tight lipped smile. God, why did his sister have to be so protective?

“Oh, hello! Welcome to my home,” the woman you assumed was Rita, greeted. 

“Thank you, so much.” You stepped in and extended your hand. “I’m Y/N Reid.” 

“Dinner’s ready so we once we get it on the table, we can eat,” Rita informed.

“Oh, do you need any help?” you offered. 

“No, no, we’ve got it. Debra?” 

She smiled and followed Rita while you and Dexter got seated. Soon, the food was on the table and everyone got their food plated. 

“So, Y/N, Dexter told me you’re a doctor?”

“Oh, merely a PhD.”

“Didn’t know you needed a PhD to be a Fed,” Debra remarked.

You hesitated, staring at her. This was going to be an interrogation, wasn’t it? 

“You, uh, you don’t,” you started. “But I wanted to have the licensure to deal with the mentally unstable. My husband has one too, and he’s an agent as well. He’s a certified genius though and likes to show off.” 

“Oh you’re married?” Rita said happily. “And you two work together?”

“Yes, actually on the same team. I’m just in Miami temporarily. I’m teaching a forensic psych course.”

“How interesting,” Rita remarked.

“Your husband’s a genius?” Dexter suddenly asked. “You never told me that.”

“I don’t tell a lot of people. Too many people think I’m somehow bragging about it. I suppose sometimes I am, but…” You laughed lightly. “He’s got an IQ of 187 and can read 20,000 words per minute with an eidetic memory.”

“Wow, that’s impressive,” Rita noted. 

“One of the millions of reasons I fell for him.” 

“You two know each other before you were an agent?”

You shook your head. “No, we met on the job. I know what they say, you know, don’t date coworkers, but I couldn’t help myself.” 

The two women slightly laughed and Dexter smiled. 

“What about you two? Dexter talks about you but he’s never told me how you met.” 

“Oh, uh, I have an abusive ex, or had, and Debra here was the first officer on the scene. She set up a date between Dex and I and I guess it’s been fate ever since.” Rita reached over and squeezed Dexter’s hand.

“Aw, Debra, I didn’t know you were a matchmaker,” you teased, looking at her. 

“And I didn’t know you were an undercover agent,” she noted, irritation in her tone.

“I uh, I’m not.” 

“Then why does Dex think he has to hide you, hmm?”

Dexter looked at Debra, giving her a warning look. “Deb, we just met and I don't usually bring my work home with me. But we had some things in common and turns out, she's not total FBI scum.”

“BAU,” you corrected quickly.

“Just seems weird,” she said before taking a sip of water. 

“I wanted to make sure she’s okay to bring around the kids, if it ever came to that. Not like I have any other friends outside that building. Just because she’s FBI--”

Quickly, you interjected. “BAU.”

He smirked quickly, but continued “--doesn’t mean she’s a bad person, Deb,” Dexter implored. 

“And you two met from an investigation?” Rita wondered.

You nodded. “Yeah, Dexter did the bloodwork on some of the missing persons I’m investigating and I wanted his take on the cases.” 

“I hope he was helpful,” Rita noted, rubbing Dexter’s arm and smiling at him.

You grinned. “He was very helpful. He helped me see the case from a new perspective.”

“That’s great. So you gonna catch this fucker?” Debra asked.

“Deb, hey,” Dexter chastised. “Not at Rita’s table, alright?”

“Sheesh, alright. So you gonna catch him or what?” 

“Still need some more to go off of. Right now they’re still just missing. Speaking of, where are your kids, Rita? I really wanted to meet them.”

“Oh they’re over at a neighbor’s. Do you have kids of your own?” 

With that, a slice of guilt cut across your stomach. This made you think of Spence and the lying you were doing. You knew Spence was dying to have kids, but now with your new lifestyle choice… how could that ever be an option? You couldn’t attack a full grown man with a watermelon sized stomach. 

“Uh, no. No not yet but my husband would leap over the moon if we did,” you said with a smile.

“Aw, must be nice to have a man who wants kids.”

“Yeah, he adores them. He’s the godfather to our coworker’s little ones and he loves every second of being like an uncle to them.” 

“You must miss him very much,” Rita stated.

“I do. Every day away from him is a day I’m not sure I can bear.” You thought about him a moment and how much you truly did miss him. In all honesty, being around Dexter was the only time you weren’t ravaged with longing. You took a deep breath. “But it’s for the best. I get a break from our cases, I get to stay in one city for a few months at a time, and I get to add professor to my resume.” 

Rita and Dexter laughed but Debra seemed to not believe you. 

You all talked a bit more about your job, what you were doing, what Rita was like. Dinner was done and you offered to help them clean up but Rita insisted she had it while Dexter assisted her. You went over to the door to wait to say goodbye to Dex when Deb walked up.

“Look, I don’t know what’s going on between you and my brother, but if it’s going to hurt Rita, I want you to knock it off,” she warned.

You looked at her. You were happy she was being protective. She was a good sister to Dex, and you liked that.

“Debra, I’m not here to hurt Rita, Dexter, or you in any way. We’re just friends and I’m devoted to a loving husband.” You gave her a soft smile and hoped that backed up your words.

She eyed you up and down. “Alright. If you say so. Sorry I just… sometimes my brother is a little weird and he’s right about not having too many friends so when I saw you at his place… It’s just Rita is really good for him, you know? I don’t want him fucking that up.” 

You glanced over her shoulder at the two of them. 

“Me either. And you had every right to get worried. If the roles were reversed, I’d do the same. They’re lucky to have you looking out for them.” 

She smiled at you. “Well, just don’t fuck with them and we’ll be cool, alright?”

You nodded and grinned. 

Finally, Rita and Dexter approached.

“Rita, dinner was great and I’m happy to have met you finally. Thank you for having me over.” Shaking her hand, you flashed her a smile. “See you around, Dexter.” 

You waved to them all and got to the car, breathing a sigh of relief. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Tagging:

Forever Tag:

@essie1876​​​​​​

@magpiegirl80​​​​​​

@letsgetfuckingsuperwholocked​​​​​​

@iamwarrenspeace​​

@marvel-imagines-yes-please​​

@superwholocked527

@missinstantgratification​​​

@thejemersoninferno​​​​​​

@rda1989​​​​​​

@munlis​​​​​​

@thefridgeismybestie​​​​​​

@bubblyanarocks3​​​​​​

@igiveupicantthinkofausername​​​​​​

@kaliforniacoastalteens​​​​​​

@feelmyroarrrr​​​​​​​

@kaeling

@friendlyneighbourhoodweirdo​​​​​​

@damalseer​​​​​​

@heyitscam99​​​​​​

@yknott81​​​​​

@thelittlebigirl​​​​​​

@glitterquadricorn​​​​​​

@xxqueenofisolationxx

@little-dis-kaalista-pythonissama

@bittersweetunicorm​​​​​​

@alyssaj23​​​​​​

@sea040561​​​​​​

@princess76179​​​​​​

@thisismysecrethappyplace​​​​​​

@sarahp879​​​​​​

@malfoysqueen14​​​​​​

@ellallheart​​​​​​

@breezy1415​​​​​​

@marvelmayo​​​​​​

@paintballkid711​​​​​​

Spencer Reid

@camigt1999​​​​​​

@ultrarebelheart​​​​​​

@lenawiinchester​​​​​​

@esoltis280​

ITCM

@arganfics​

[starleyquinne-au]

@midori-berry​ asked: 🍑 🍒and 🍉 for the headcannon asks? 

The following contains spoilers for the upcoming episode, Episode 5: Memory Suppressants which will be out in 1-2 weeks!

🍑  :    how meticulously does my muse look after their physical appearance?  do they spend a lot of time on their hair,  makeup,  grooming,  and clothing?  is there a particular reason why they do or don’t?   

Starley is in fact rather particular about his appearance. For his routine since he’s a morning person he’s up at 6, and looks over what he has in store for today, usually has a journal tabbed for important events. Afterwards he spends nearly an hour getting ready, this includes getting dressed, accessorizing, brushing his fur/hair (it’s somewhat thick and has to brush it for a certain amount of times before putting it up) and putting on makeup (eyeshadow/liner).

This process is out of habit however. Being raised by not only a business woman but a single one at that, his mother had interesting perceptions about the world. To her, the world was a corporate office and everyone around you was your opponent, fighting to get to the top. She ingrained it into Starley that he always had to look/do/be his best (up to her standards). He grew up spending nearly as much time grooming as he did with studying. As taught, if he wasn’t at his best then someone else would be at theirs and would take what should’ve been his. This world doesn’t have room for the weak, for losers as his mother would say.

There was a period however after the breakup with Eggman he just,,stopped all of it. There wasn’t any point to. He felt as if he had no one to impress. No one to compete against. His family was gone, his old friends and former lover were gone. And while Mimic was there he felt as if the octopus was only letting him stay out of pity so why bother trying? He does get over this as he’s quite different compared to his college/empire days. He often looks in the mirror, still unable to believe he’s here and this is how he is. Despite the hell he’s faced and the mistakes he’s made he’s still Starley Quinne. And no one can take that away from him, he’ll make sure of it.

🍒  :    how much does my muse value companionship?  do they constantly keep people around them,  or do they prefer to be alone often?  do they have or desire to have many friends?  do they see every meeting as an opportunity to make a new friend?   

Starley has a very mixed relationship with the concept of companionship. Another interesting belief his mother taught him, along with the world is corporate, was that friendship doesn’t exist. At least the selfless kind. There was no point in doing something if there was no gain to it. And like that, there was no point in forming relationships if they had nothing to offer. Because of this belief, his mother often controlled who he befriended or dismissed. Due to this not many people liked Starley growing up and the “few friends” he had knew why he considered them a “friend.” His only friends at the time were his sister Anne, and her friend Lucia, even then he didn’t have them during the brutal years of middle/high school (Anne was thrown out at 18 and Lucia’s family took her in).

Because of this, once he was kicked out (was taken in by his sister) and went to uni he was very in his shell and quiet. He tended to stay away from crowds and sat alone/away from people. As he progressed in his program he did make one friend during the time. A green locust who took up psychology for nefarious reasons lokar.

and there’s no harley quinn without doctor quinzel Doctor Starline, after graduating went to work for Comet’s Psychology (after meeting Comet at a college fair and being guaranteed a job after graduating). He met the many different doctors: Suki, Biscotti and Marilyn. He still very shy and withdrawn during break and after hours, but in time he warmed up to them and considered them a second family.

Why did he leave? One night he was looking out to the night sky feeling soft and found. In the back of his head he heard his mother’s voice calling out to him, telling him that this, this friendship wasn’t real. They went back and forth until the voice asks him how he and Comet met. When he recalls back to the fair he goes still. He realizes that if it wasn’t for his professionalism and studying, for being there on the day of the fair he wouldn’t have his job, let alone his friends. He questions if they were true to him, if they really liked him, or did they just like how he made them look? This causes him to snap and he basically walks out on not only them, but his sister too, never to see them again (perhaps in the near future he will face them). He leaves to make something of himself, researching rare gems and arcane powers. During this period he encounters Doctor Eggman and develops feelings for the Doctor. Later they formally meet and Starley is with the Empire for a hellish two years.

Even now with his new crew, he tries to avoid growing attached to them as he knows this alliance is temporary. Once they build themselves up they’ll leave never to see each other again. The only one he’s truly scared of losing is Mimic, it is by the fault of his own for allowing this to happen. Perhaps it’s because Mimic has no ulterior motives for Starley, maybe it’s because Mimic (other than Orbot/Cubot) was the only member of the Empire nice to him. Regardless he still looks out to the sea, wishing for this companionship to last forever. Just for once, let something last.

🍉  :    which of the four seasons suits my muse best,  and why?

Starley loves the period between spring and summer but if he had to choose it would be spring. He always had a fascination with watching things grow. He loved the order of life, the new young life of spring, the flowers bloomed in the summer heat, the bountiful harvest in the fall season, the hibernation and bare trees during winter’s frost, and for it all to start over again once spring came. He loved how it just knew when to do it, and that this occur again and again, to him it was the perfect way of life. Even now he still enjoys spring, but for another reason. Despite the circumstances given to plants before they even sprouted some still emerge full of life as the other plants who grew in more fortunate areas. He looks over to a nearby rose bush and sighs.

[daddysfangirls-marvel]

A thousand years of Happiness

Warning: fluff, language, and more fluff, just pure fluff

Summary: Five years later everything is better and everyone is happy. Steve goes over a few memories and congratulates Bucky on doing what he said he was going to do for 70 years straight. They are happy.

70 years of grief

70 years of pain

70 years alone

70 years to happiness

A Thousand Years of Happiness

They went to therapy as they said they would together and apart they talked about their issues. (Y/n) talked about her abandonment and anger issues as well as her resentment towards others and their happiness. Steve talked about his commitment issues, attachment issues, and how he believes everyone wanted him to act a certain way and this way caused him trouble with important people in his life.

 (Y/n) learned she didn’t need to forgive Steve she just needed to understand where he was in those moments and not surround herself by hate any longer. She couldn’t let that control her life any longer. Steve learned that he could not and should not expect (y/n) to forgive him what he did to her was wrong and she was at a very low point in her life when all this occurred. Also, he should not keep everything bottled up he tends to release it in irresponsible and reckless behavior.

Together and apart they were making progress with themselves. A year later they were becoming Happy. 

“Are you ready?” Steve said as he smoothed out his suit for the third time. His emotions were all over the place right now but on the surface, he was okay and good to go he was totally okay and ready for this mission. He looked determined.

“Yeah, let’s do this” (Y/n) said picking up her decorated secret weapon of choice and taking Steve’s arm. As the doors opened music began to play as they walked down the path all eyes were on them as they walked down the path. Bucky was at the end of this path looking like he was very determined but also holding on to his emotions barely. When they reached the end the music stopped. Steve took his place behind Bucky and (y/n) handed decorated secret weapon to Tony who was standing behind her. 

“Welcome friends and family. “ and cue the waterworks. As soon as Thor said those words Both Steve and Bucky burst into tears. Reaching over the bride Tony passed two handkerchiefs to Bucky and Steve. (Y/n) giggled a bit as she helped her groom wipe his tears trying to hold back her own. Sam got Steve to pull himself together enough and they left Thor to continue.

“We have gathered here today under the sight of..well me, and those that are loved and cared for, To witness and celebrate these two beautiful people come together starting a new chapter in life as Husband and Wife.” And more tears. (Y/n) waited until after the kiss to burst into tears

-

“She an assassin. He’s an assassin. She has knives. He has guns. These two are like the deadliest match made in heaven. Seriously I met them both behind glass windows for my safety and I didn’t feel safe. And Now as her best friend and his third greatest rival, second being Sam Wilson and First being Metal detectors, Standing her today I .....still don’t feel safe. He has a Glock on his ankle. She has knives in her bouquet. I’m not kidding.” Everyone laughed and to support his claim she pulled out three knives from her Bouquet. Some people stopped laughing others laughed harder. “Seriously when he dips under that dress he’s going to come back with a garter and 9 millimeter Smith & Wesson. But even as dangerous and unstable both of you are you deserved Happiness and You’ve finally found it. To you and your future super soldier babies, I say cheers.”

Everyone clapped as and took sips of their glass as Tony stepped down bowing dramatically and giving Steve a high five on the way.

“ Hello, Hello. I’m Steve. but you guys probably knew that already. Today my brother and sister got married, that sounds weird. Um... today two people I love and care for deeply have found love in each other and have promised themselves to each other forever. Four times, Bucky told be Four times he was going to marry my sister. The first time-

Bucky and Steve had met a few days prior. Bucky had Saved Steve from a beating and the two had become fast friends. “Come on let's go. I want to show you something” Bucky said as he dragged Steve along. He had stolen Steve from his home in the early morning with the promise of showing him something cool and pretty. Suddenly Bucky ducks down behind a car and pulls Steve with him. as he looks around the corner he waves Steve over. “ Look, see that girl in the blue dress,” he says nodding his head towards two girls one in a pink dress and another in a blue dress that was very familiar to Steve.

“What about her?” he was curious to hear what he had to say about the blue dress girl.

“isn’t she the prettiest girl you’ve ever seen. She’s gorgeous. I’m going to marry that girl”

“ That’s my sister”

“Yeah in the first week we met at the age of 8 he confessed to being in love with my little sister. Way To start a relationship. And me being the smart ass-osicate that I am” Steve sends a wink to Clint And Lauren who brought their children “I introduce him and his sentence to her was “ I’m JUcky” he couldn’t pick between James and Bucky. She called him Jucky for two weeks before his mother corrected her. The next time he told me that he was going to marry her was at Prom-

Steve was sitting on the curve in the parking lot holding a towel up to his bleeding nose. He had just got kicked out of his senior Prom for fighting. The guys were talking mess about his sister he told them to stop and knock it off they didn’t and a fight began. The guys who beat him up were still inside dancing the night away while he was bleeding outside. 

“Sorry I ruined your night. I know you were trying to make it special for her.”

“Don’t worry about it, okay?” Bucky said as he rubbed Steve’s back.

“I’m sorry you didn’t get your dance.”

“It doesn’t matter Steve. Because I’m going to marry that girl and after we’ll have a million dances”

As if on cue (y/n) came out screaming at the top of her lunges cursing everybody. 

“Are you sure?”

“he said he was sure. I mean She was screaming at the top of her lunges like a banshie but he looked at her like an angel fallen from heaven. She looked like something that crawled up from hell in a dress” Everyone began to laugh while (y/n) dunked her head embarrassed  Bucky kissed her hairline and brought her back up. “ The third time he said it we were camped out in Germany as soldiers. And he didn’t just tell me he told everyone who would hear. And showed them all a picture of his future wife.”

The soldiers were sharing stories and photos of their families and loved ones. Bucky was eager to tell his story when it was his turn. Steve just rolled his eyes as he watched his friend bounce in his seat.

“Alright Barnes, you’re practically vibrating over there. Tell us about yours.”

“ (Y/n), (y/n) Rogers,” Bucky said as he passed around a picture of her.

“My sister” Steve as he passed around a different picture of her.

“Isn’t she beautiful? she’s at home waiting for us. She’s.. the one who keeps pushing me. If it wasn’t for her I would have kicked the bucket already.”

“What am I a bug?” Steve said throwing up his arm very offended but Bucky ignores him.

“She’s the love of my life. I can’t imagine living life without her and I don’t want to. And When we get back I’m going to marry her.”

“Are you asking me or tell me?”

“So yeah everyone knew who Bucky’s future wife was before she herself knew. Like even the German Prisoners we caught he showed them pictures of her too. I think that was Torture for them listening to him go on and on about her for hours and days. They were annoyed so much they became allies to get away from him.” Now it was Bucky’s turn to be embarrassed and Sam was eating it up as Bucky dipped his head into his wife’s neck hiding. 

“And the last time he said he was going to marry her I was done for nearly 70 years he’s been talking about this girl and how he was going to marry and make his wife yet he hadn’t even asked. I was kind of over it at that time.”

“ Reaper, Reaper, That's what people call me. Why? 'Cause they all die. When I sing, I end their lives. You act as though payback makes you a nobleman. Is that a fact? Well, you're a goddamn philistine! “

(Y/n) was sing and skipping through the compound looking for her target. Even though it was really creepy and scary the singing was doing good as it was making the agents run away from her and towards the others who would rather be knocked out and captured by them then killed brutally by her.

“(y/n), honey, but that song is extremely creepy can you turn off your mic.

“Don’t you dare darling. You sing your heart about baby girl.” Bucky said scoffing at Tony

“Requiem aeternum, reaper has come, sinner.

Thigh-high socks are my absolute territory, Go on and drool, the Otaku can not resist. You think the fire in your eyes makes you a tiger in disguise? Dream on, you goddamn pussy! “ she began to sing louder

“Friday Please mute (Y/n)”

“Reaper, reaper, That's what people call me. -”

“Thank you.”

“For shame on you Tony for shame.”

“Shut up Barnes. You can make her sing when we get back to the compound” Tony teased the others laughed as Steve then turned off his own mic as he did not want to hear them talking about his sister like that. Bucky, who was standing next to him, followed suit turning his off as well.

“I like her singing”

“It is creepy, Bucky.”

“She sings other things as well. She has a very beautiful voice”

“I know. You forget she uses to sing me to sleep when I was sick. Sunshine was my favorite song.” Steve smiled at the memory. 

“Sunshine?” Sam question as he stepped out of a lab and started to walk next to them.

“You are my sunshine. My only sunshine You make me happy-you know that song.”

“I don’t know why but I can’t imagine her sing that song.” As if on cue (y/n) came skipping down the hall she was in her usual gear a black bulletproof dress that stopped at her knees. A small amount of blood was splashed on her face and her shoes left an imprint of blood in her steps. In one hand she had her dagger and the other her danger. She smiled and waved with her dagger as she skipped along still singing.

“Requiem eternal, Bullets right through the sternum, Lullaby to hell bane, Reaper's got your name. 

Margaret is Greek you geek, It means a pearl, I'm a pure girl. Boys cannot crack this oyster shell, So go on, whip around that sword like you're the best, It's such a bore, Another hero? Oh please”

They all waited until her singing faded away before speaking again. It was Bucky who spoke first and his words shocked Sam but made Steve roll his eyes.

“I’m going to marry that girl”

“Are you sure?” Sams asked looking concerned but also amused “ That seems a bit dangerous”.

“I don’t care I’m going to marry her. I’m going to make her my wife.”

“JUST DO IT ALREADY” Steve shouts startling both Bucky and Sam “ You’ve been talking about this for nearly 70 years just do it already. I’m tired of hearing about it but never see it. Don’t get my hopes up pop the fucking question.” Steve walked away mumbling about how slow Bucky was and he probably has to wait another 50 years. Sam and Bucky just looked at each other.

“After that, he came home and finally asked her. I guess what I’m trying to say is I’ve watched you guys love each other for a hundred years. I’ve watched Bucky promise himself to you and only you for a hundred years. The years have not been kind to any of you. You’ve both changed dramatically, you both grew, you lived through time. But the thing that stayed constant with you two was your love for each other. You two have loved each other for a hundred years. And now I asked everyone to raise their glasses for another hundred years of pure love for these two”

“AND THEIR BABIES” Tony shouted everyone laughed Steve smiled

“And their future children.”

Everyone cheered as their glasses clinked and they drank. (Y/n) and Bucky smiles sharing a gentle kiss. He was right the only constant in her life so far was her love for Bucky. And Bucky always had her name at the back of his mind and his love for her on the tip of his tongue even when he couldn’t remember her. In their hundred years, happiness had not been a constant, with the way they were living it was a privilege they were not allowed to have. But now the darkness was fading away and bringing forth the light they were ready for it and they were going to protect it. 

No more hate, No more pain, no more grief, no more abandonment, Just pure happiness and nothing more. This is what she always wanted and she finally got it. 

It wasn’t perfect but it was hers.

The End

Request tags

permanent tags

@lovely-lollipops-blog @totallyweirdsam @sexysamsungl @lilylovelyxo @iamwarrenspeace @geeksareunique @that-random-emu @supreme-leader-jazlo-ren @stone2576 @lil-dino-trash @metal-armed-dino @dylanobrienmoviekid @theshortegg @dontevenblink-badwolf-tardis @mandylove1000  @isnotashtonstan @broitsmydick @onceaballeralwaysaballer1213 @mypage-myfandoms @jordynhartley2001 @midnightdream83 @cookies186 @i-am-marvel-trash-forever @marvels-queen-bee @aebeessun @gabriels-gumdrop @the-best-alchemist @smile-my-bean @valeriae2903 @cassiopeia-barrow @uberduber-loulou @spideyboiiiiiii @lookinsidemyhead

MCU tags 

@acupofhotlatte