#if people are listening to things physically it's on vinyl but i feel like they could've just done the vault tracks alone on vinyl you

[sansaorgana]

benny saving you from abusive bf or dad :(

hello, love! thank you for your request 🥰 I was self-indulgent and chose an abusive dad lol proceed with caution because there is lots of physical violence / domestic abuse in this fic

requests for benny are open 🥺🎀

You were dolling yourself up for the date with Benny in your room upstairs – putting makeup on, brushing your hair, spraying perfume and singing along to the rock and roll songs you played. Perhaps a little bit too loud because you couldn’t hear the rapid footsteps approaching your bedroom. When the door opened, you got startled as you turned around to see your angry father.

“What is it?” You asked, irritated already because he didn’t knock.

He looked you up and down with contempt and pointed at the record player.

“Turn that shit down,” he barked at you. “I’ve just come back from work, I want to fucking rest, I can’t even hear the goddamn TV because of this crap! I’ve told you already that if you want to listen to this sort of music, you’re free to do so when you’re home alone!” He raised his voice and you sighed.

“I didn’t hear you coming back home, gee,” you rolled your eyes and you approached the record player but you didn’t turn the music off, just slightly decreased the volume.

“You would have heard if you weren’t listening to this! And what are you, deaf now? I’ve told you to turn that shit down,” your father grabbed you by your arm and then pushed you away.

Tears pricked the corners of your eyes. Perhaps at this point you should be used to him being like that. But you couldn’t. To some things you just couldn’t get used to, no matter how many times they’d happen. You would never understand why your dad couldn’t treat you like his precious princess. Why was he raising you the way some other men raised their sons – some bastards, of course. Because not every son was treated like this by their father. And you were a girl treated like dirt.

The way he treated you was much more than the constant stress at home – no, that you would survive. It was going deeper. It was about the way you had this feeling deep down inside that no man could ever love and protect you because your own father couldn’t. Yeah, you were dating Benny now but you weren’t sure what his feelings towards you truly were like. Benny was not a man of many words and he wouldn’t open up – especially about his feelings.

“What are you doing, by the way?” Your father asked when you finally turned the record player down and hid the vinyl away. “You’re going out?”

“Yeah! Do I need your permission?” You snapped and he clenched his jaw.

“What’s going on here?” Your mother peeked inside the room with widened eyes, already fearing her husband’s tantrum.

“She’s going out to waste away all the money again,” he pointed at you.

“She’s an adult, it’s just a date,” your mother stood up for you.

“And I spend my own money. I work!” You reminded him angrily and went back to brushing your hair in front of the mirror, pretending everything was fine.

“Why can other young people save their money to be able to move out of their parents’ house and you just want to go out and spend money on parties all the time because apparently being a parasite is not a problem for you?!” Your father yelled and your mother started to shush him.

The accusations were so wrong. You weren’t even partying much. It was just a date with Benny and how much would you spend? Nothing, really. A few pennies for the milkshake maybe but the chances were Benny would pay for it anyway.

“She’s just going out on a date,” your mother explained to your father, trying to calm him down but it had the opposite effect. His eyes widened as his fists clenched.

“With that… That dirty… That dirty punk?!” He asked as his booming tone echoed through the walls. “Haven’t I told you, you stupid girl, I don’t want to see you around him?!”

“Dad, stop!” You hissed at the feeling of his grip on your arm again. This time he didn’t let go, no, he was squeezing and squeezing, trying to twist it.

“Stop it!” Your mother tried to intervene but he pushed her away.

“Dad, you’re hurting me!”

“It’s nothing compared to what that bastard will put you through! My daughter won’t end up like a common whore!” He was yelling and you saw the blind rage in his eyes – he was gone now, completely out of common sense, driven only by his rage and fury.

His yelling, your squealing and your mother’s crying were so loud that you didn’t hear the sound of the motorbike’s engine parking outside. Benny jumped off of his bike and leaned on it, waiting for you. But when he reached for the cigarette, he froze for a moment as he realised that the yelling noises came from the room upstairs inside your house. He glanced up and noticed that the window to your room was half open.

He hid the cigarette away and furrowed his brow.

“Dad, let go of me!” You squealed and Benny saw your silhouette in the grip of your father as he slapped your face.

“I’ve told you to shut the fuck up, both of you!” He yelled. “Congratulations,” he addressed another woman inside your room. “Your daughter is now a whore just like you, hanging out with those bums and punks and dirty fucking bikers…” He looked at you again. “You stink of them! The rotten stench on you, you’re a whore!”

Benny’s blood boiled at the scene he was witnessing. You had mentioned earlier that your father was “an asshole” but he had never expected this sort of asshole. He thought he was just mean and grumpy.

He wasn’t thinking straight anymore. He approached the front door and tried to open them but they were closed. So, with one kick of his boot, he broke inside. He couldn’t care less about the fucking door.

You didn’t even hear that. All you could hear was your father’s yelling and your mother crying. Your arm in his grip, your cheeks wet from tears and stinging from his slaps. It was one of those moments when you didn’t even care whether you would live or die anymore. In fact, you wished he would just kill you and make it all stop.

You saw his hand raising again to hit you once more when the door to your room opened rapidly and you all froze, turning around to see Benny himself.

Your heart skipped a beat at the sight of him but your father’s grip tightened even more. He blinked a few times with his mouth half open and Benny was breathing heavily with his face reddened from anger.

Before your father could act, Benny approached him and punched him in his face so hard that your father let go of you completely.

“What are you doing! Stop!” Your mother squealed and grabbed Benny’s sleeve but he ignored her to deliver one more punch – this time in your father’s guts.

He fell down to the ground and Benny was kicking him without even saying a word. He was like an animal, you thought. And your mother still cried and squealed and begged – pathetically, really. How could she defend your father suddenly? And he… He was only grunting as his face was getting bloody. You saw it all in slow motion.

Benny delivered a final kick and spat on your father before pushing your mother away gently, with a shrug of his arms.

“Touch her again and I’ll fucking kill you,” he drawled through his gritted teeth at your father and finally turned around to face you.

“You okay?” He asked, a hint of worry in his face as he visibly softened. You were standing there, petrified and trembling slightly. But his question finally brought you back to reality.

“Let’s get outta here,” you only whispered and grabbed his rough hand to lead him downstairs as fast as possible.

You noticed the broken door and looked at him as if he was crazy.

“Sorry,” he shrugged his arms and your heart filled with love.

No man had ever protected you like that before. No man had ever made you feel safe either. You would marry him right away if he asked.

“Don’t be,” you only said and went outside to approach his motorbike.

You both jumped on it and drove away as fast as possible. You didn’t even care where he was taking you. If you’d never go back home – you were okay with that.

But Benny took you to the club. He led you inside gently and some of the boys widened their eyes at you.

“What the fuck happened to her?” Johnny asked and squinted his eyes at Benny as if he was accusing him of something.

Benny didn’t answer and just walked you to the bathroom. He closed the door behind you and you saw yourself in the mirror. Oh, now you understood why they were giving you funny looks. You had a bruise on your cheek, your makeup was smudged from crying and your hair was ruffled.

“You okay?” Benny stood behind you to put his hands on your arms. “Hey, doll, look at me,” he asked and you looked up as you turned around.

Now, when it was just the two of you and you finally felt safe, the tension left your body and you sobbed as you clung to him. Benny wrapped his arms around you and pulled you closer as he hid his face in your hair. 

“I’m sorry, kitty, I had no idea he was like that…”

“It’s not your fault,” you mumbled between the sobs.

“I just can’t understand… How can a father treat his daughter like that? A little dollie like you?” Benny was in genuine disbelief. “Hey, listen, let’s fix that, hm?” He moved away slightly and started to brush your hair with his fingers but it was only making it look worse. “Ugh, shit,” he chuckled. “I’ve an idea. I’ll take you to Johnny’s. Betty will know what to do,” Benny proposed and you nodded shyly as you sniffed and wiped your cheeks from the remaining tears. “And, hey,” Benny grabbed your wrists gently to move them away from your face as he leaned in, “I won’t ever let anyone hurt you again, do you hear me?” He was serious about it and you nodded.

He joined your lips together in a sweet and delicate kiss as if you were made of glass. Benny had never kissed you like that before but now he thought you needed that more than anything – the gentleness.

“I can’t offer you much, kitty, but I won’t ever do you no harm,” he promised in a whisper. “I wanna take care of you.”

His words were healing the broken pieces inside you and you felt like sobbing again. You wrapped your arms around him and pressed your chest to his to feel his heartbeat.

“You’re already offering me enough, Benny,” you assured him and he kissed the top of your head, feeling the tears pricking his own eyes now but he sniffed them away.

MASTERLIST || BENNY MASTERLIST

[sinisternymphette]

sheep!reader - a concept

✦ sheep!reader loves the outdoors, and is usually found basking under the sun as they daydream or running around the grassy plains as they chase butterflies. However, they value the company and prefer to spend their time with others, thriving in groups rather than in their solitude.

✦ sheep!reader is kind in their nature, and would do anything for their loved ones. They also like to show their affection physically, always ready to give a warm hug to someone who needs it, or shower their significant other with pretty little kisses all over their face.

✦ sheep!reader is, however, oblivious to the evil in others. They trust those they love, and want to fit in so desperately that they're easy to mold- easy to manipulate. They like to see the good in others, but often forget that evil also exists.

✦ sheep!reader, who is easily spooked or surprised. They feel squeamish at the sight of a single drop of blood and shiver in fear when they hear a strange sound. Though they'll often try to mask it underneath an awkward close-mouthed smile or giggle. If you ask them to watch a true-crime show with you, they'll still accept even if they don't want to deep inside.

✦ sheep!reader, who likes to do arts and crafts in their free time. They're dreamers and like to put their creativity into something of their own, such as their own plushies, clothing, diy home decorations and many more.

✦ sheep!reader, who likes collecting vintage items like precious moments figurines, vinyl, and even fabrics. Their song library is also full of old songs and classical music, not having a liking for rap, rock and metal music. They listen to their music either on their iPod or record player. Their musical muses are mazzy star, kate bush, the cranberries, phil collins, autumn's grey solace and the smiths.

✦ sheep!reader, who loves wearing soft and lighter colors, no matter the season. They nail the southern belle, farmer's daughter and cottagecore aesthetics, giving them an angelic appearance; radiating joy and innocence and beauty that surely catches many eyes, though they never seem to notice as they're in their own little world.

✦ sheep!reader, who tries their best at everything, but often feel like they're doing everything wrong. They often find themselves cringing about something they said in a conversation from days ago, tripping and falling in front of everyone at the worst moment possible, or not being able to concentrate on their studies and understanding the subjects they're taught. They're emotionally fragile, easily overwhelmed and stressed.

✦ sheep!reader, who loves animals and is 100% a future cat lady. They find almost every animal cute and adorable- from spiders to sharks. Despite their skittishness to most things, animals are the only thing they aren't scared of. They love watching animal documentaries for hours- and they never get bored.

✦ sheep!reader, who likes to draw people they find pretty. Honestly, they find everyone beautiful, but those who are kind-hearted and have beauty inside and outside are ought to get at least one drawing from them.

ib: @princessbrunette !!

a/n: everyone is free to send me an ask with sheep!reader in any of the universes mentioned in my rules and I'll do my best to make them fit in the story/au! if it's an anime, modern!au is preferred. I based them a little off myself, so I hope you all like them!

@sinisternymphette 2024

[ssseashell]

my newtmas headcanons (because i saw some people posting their own hc's and had to share mine)

these are mostly based on a modern setting scenario, but some can be pictured in canon aswell ^__^ 🐈🐈‍⬛

thomas has dimples, newt has freckles

thomas has brown hazel-ish eyes, newt has dark brown eyes

thomas’ cheeks are naturally red and newt’s cheeks are pale and, sometimes, they turn pink

newt collects vinyls and books, thomas collects comic books and mini figures

thomas’ love language is ‘physical touch’, so he’s always touching newt; holding his hands, massaging his back, playing with the lobe of his ear, temple kisses, love bites, whatever.

newt’s love language is ‘words of affirmation’, so thomas receives ‘i love you’s and any other sweet words like 50 times a day (he also makes sure he says it a lot)

eye contact, lots of eye contact. especially before they were together

small touches

arms brushing against one another

fingers rushing against one another

thomas still is determined to count every freckle newt has in his face

kisses. all types of kisses. smiles between kisses / slow kisses / messy kisses / following a kiss on the lips with a series of kisses down the neck / kisses that were meant to be gentle, ending up in devout passion / long kisses that leave them breathless and flustered

hugs. a lot of hugs. all types of hugs.

they know everything about each other

newt loves playing with thomas’ hair. he cut his hair once. never again

thomas has terrible memory, newt remembers everything

newt likes to draw and paint, thomas likes to make music (he knows how to play the guitar)

newt’s fav color is green, thomas’ fav color is red

they read together sometimes, each with their own book – but thomas is usually the one to get bored first, so he just lays on newt’s lap while newt plays with his hair and reads his book aloud for him

thomas likes to run late at night and when he’s back he just wants to sleep and cuddle, but newt won’t touch him until he’s showered

sometimes thomas comes home with some cut or injury from running and newt takes care of him every time

newt gets sick easily, so thomas had to learn how to take care of him. newt: don’t touch me, i’m all sick / thomas: i don’t care

newt, to thomas: if i hear you sing to heathers in the shower again i’ll join you just to drown you

every time they kiss in a stairwell, thomas makes sure he’s on a higher step so, for some seconds, he’s taller than newt

newt makes thomas trade their food when he likes the brunet’s better

thomas, when cuddling: “i’m hungry” / newt: “i’m not moving”

thomas had this bad habit of biting into his nails when he’s anxious or stressed, newt hates it

when newt is crying because of stress or anger, thomas licks his cheeks to catch his tears and never fails to make the blond chuckle

newt discovered he loves thomas on a random tuesday night. they were dancing and singing with their friends and thomas slipped on air and fell on his butt, and newt was like yeah, he’s so dumb. i do love him

they like to bake their friends’ birthday cakes together as part of their present (thomas is awful at the kitchen, so all he does is basically put the candles on top of the cake once it’s done

thomas is that person to be excitedly yapping in bed about his day and then, in two seconds, is falling asleep mid sentence because he’s so tired. and newt just giggles every time it happens, and kisses his forehead passionately before also falling asleep

sometimes newt feels so homesick it hurts, so thomas does all he can to cheer him up with silly little things, like watching newt’s favorite english movies or listening to songs he listened to when he was a kid, or having a tea party playdate where they pretend they are from the english royalty (yes, it’s so stupid

thomas: damn, it’s like my mom likes you better than me

thomas’ hand is smaller

they both love all rom coms, romantic comedies and christmas classics so, every week precisely, they buy all the sweet treats they want and make popcorn and choose something to watch together (even if it’s not christmas, even if it’s something they’d watched 1000 times already

[darksigns-exe]

clearest blue - noah sebastian x laurie (ofc)

Pairing: Noah Sebastian x Laurie (ofc) Word Count: 4.6k Warnings: swearing, light angst Note: This is a little thought experiment related to to know you're mine. In this version of the story, some things are a little different.

Masterlist

A second hand music store feels like a redundant thing to Noah. Who, in their right mind, is still buying physical music? Nick, apparently, and he’s willing to entertain his interest in this new shop. If anything, it’s a good way to pass a little time, and maybe he’ll be able to sell some of the things he doesn’t need any more here.

He trots a few paces behind Nick as they enter the store. This is so not his crowd, Noah thinks. Pretentious indie people who think that vinyl is the superior way to listen to music. The music that filters from the speakers feels like something from a free to use audio library and god he hates it.

Nick is telling him something about a really good deal on this original pressing when he sees her sorting the used CDs. She’s standing on a little step stool so that she can reach the top shelf, and even then she’s still precariously balanced on the tips of her toes.

Noah wanders closer, he has to see what she looks like, has to know if she’ll be as pretty as he thinks she is. She hops off the stool and, god, she’s tiny. He thinks that she’d barely reach his shoulder, if even that. Noah doesn’t think that he’s ever seen a prettier girl — or person for that matter. Miles out of his league with her pretty eyes and kissable lips. If he’d have an ounce of bravery in him right now, he’d —

“Hey, do you have —” Nick’s words fade out as he watches her eyes light up.

There goes his chance.

He watches as she leads his friend away from the CDs and towards a different corner of the place. There’s a dull feeling in his chest, a strange kind of pressure that grasps at his lungs. The way she smiles up at Nick is enough for him. And Nick seems to be just as dazzled by her.

Noah stops by on his own a couple of days later, a stack of CDs in the bag slung over his shoulder. Sure, he’s here to see if they’ll sell his stuff, but a part of him wants to see her again, even if Nick seems to have stolen her heart already.

She’s behind the counter when he pushes the door open. The bell above the door dings and her head snaps over to him.

That pretty bright smile reruns to her face, and she gives him a little wave. He feels like a teenager experiencing his first crush again. His heart thumps with it, and he can feel his cheeks heat.

It takes him a second too long to enter the place, but she doesn’t seem to mind. Maybe she knows that she makes everyone dizzy with the way she looks.

Noah tries his best not to make a beeline for the counter. He checks out some of the displays, flips through some of the records, and overall tries not to look as out of place as he feels. He can feel her eyes burning into his back. Noah wonders if she watches everyone like that. 

Eventually, he decides that he’s spent enough time pretending to look for something and finds his way to the counter. There’s another person in front of him, and suddenly he feels terribly nervous. They take forever to wrap up their purchase, and he starts to get the feeling that she’s just that friendly with everyone. Her giggle fills his ears, and he wants to hear that all the time. 

Finally, it’s his turn to step up to the counter. 

“Hi!” she smiles at him, and again his heart makes a little thump. 

Noah feels like an idiot, a fool. 

“Found something?” 

He shakes himself out of his little trance, “Uh– no, actually I was wondering if you could have a look at these. I need to make space and – these I can part ways with.” 

Noah digs around his bag and places the stack on top of the corner. 

He watches as she flicks through the covers, checks some of the actual CDs. She pulls a calculator out from somewhere under the counter. She taps a couple of numbers into it before regards him with a curious look. She cocks her head to the side before she adds more to her calculation. 

“Do you want cash or store credit?” she asks finally. 

“Cash.” he says quietly, hoping that she won’t think that he will never come back. 

She nods and taps around on the register for another moment, before she finally hands him forty-five dollars. 

“Is that alright?” she asks then. 

Noah hadn’t thought about how much he’d even want for the CDs. He’d only thought about getting rid of them. He nods, taking the bills from her. 

Her fingers brush against his. And Noah makes a conscious effort to keep his eyes on hers, because he knows that if he looks down and sees how small her hands look next to his, his brain will misfire and everything will go bad. It’s bad enough that he’s thinking about it now. 

“Your friend said you’re a musician?” asks then, reaching for something else under her counter. 

Noah nods, of course Nick has already gone around telling everyone about what he does. He’s been actively working on material for maybe a month, half of it is not even worth presenting to anyone. 

He nods regardless. 

“We’re doing a showcase evening every last Saturday of the month. I thought maybe you’d want to come around, play a couple of things?” she pushes a flyer across the counter, “Have a think about it. If you want to come, my number is on the flyer. No pressure though.” 

“I’ll think about it.” 

In a way, he’s already made up his mind.

“Great. I’m Laurie, by the way. I didn’t catch either of your names.” 

Laurie. 

Of course, she has a pretty name. 

“Noah. And the other guy –” he vaguely gestures up the road towards the tattoo shop, “that’s Nick.” 

“Well, I hope I’ll see you on Saturday then, Noah.” 

How can he say no? 

To his surprise, he sees her again before Saturday. Noah’s picking up sandwiches for Nick and the rest when Laurie taps him on the shoulder. 

He learns that she lives above the record store and that she’ll usually come here for her morning coffee. Noah tells her that he helps out Nick on occasion, but that other than that things are a little slow at the moment. Before he knows it, Laurie has badgered him into helping out with the online shop orders — off the record, of course so that he’ll get the most out of it. 

Nick naturally gives him shit when he comes back almost forty minutes after he’d left.

He’s barely distributed the sandwiches when his phone dings with a notification. 

Laurie. 

She’d sent him a picture of the back room, stuffed full of orders that needed to be packaged and posted. 

The texting doesn’t slow down after that. Every time he thinks that the conversation will fall asleep, one of them finds a new thing to talk about.

And soon enough, Noah finds himself getting up a little earlier so that he can sit in the coffee shop with her for a few minutes. Some days he goes with her to help with the orders, on others Nick drags him back to the studio by his ear, claiming that he barely gets to see him any more. 

When Saturday rolls around, Noah finds himself filled with nerves. He’s promised Nick that he’d help him today, and in a way he’s glad. It takes his mind off the fact that he’s about to sing something he wrote in front of however many people will show up. It makes him a little more nervous than he’d like to admit, and maybe that’s because Laurie will be there. He tries to tell himself that it’s a dumb little crush, something that will go away once he’s seen more of her. She’s miles out of his league and even if he’d have a chance with her, he doesn’t even know if she’s looking for someone like him. Who’s to say that she even wants a slightly washed up loner who cycles between three friends' couches because he can’t afford his own place. He’s already covered in tattoos and while he knows that he’s not as rough around the edges as he looks, Noah knows that he comes with more baggage than most people are comfortable with. And then there’s Laurie, who just this morning texted him how excited she was for tonight, how much she’s looking forward to hearing what he and the others will perform. He’s known her for exactly ten days, and it already feels as if he’s known her for a lifetime. There’s an unbridled sense of optimism about her, the “everything will work out” kind, and he’s inclined to believe her. 

When they lock up the shop for the day, Noah feels shakier than ever. His time slot is somewhere around the middle of the evening, and a part of him wishes that it was already over. He feels nauseous and dizzy and about ready to pass out. The walk down the road feels longer than normal. Nick keeps telling him to suck it up, that he’s played bigger places than a tiny record store in their hometown. But then it wasn’t just him and that was before. One blunder and feels as if he’s lost all cool he’s ever had. This will be the first time he’ll step foot on anything akin to a stage since, and it’s terrifying. He hopes that none of the people in attendance have heard of it or worse saw the video.

The store is already packed when they get there. There’s music, drinks, people are talking, and it seems to be an all around familiar and comfortable occasion. Most of the people seem to be regulars, and Noah doesn’t know if that makes it better or worse. He spots Laurie in the middle of a conversation with other people, she’s laughing and smiling, and his chest feels so awfully tight again. 

There are a couple of people he knows around, friends of Nick, who are quite alright. They’re mingling for a while, catching up with people neither of them have seen for a while, when he feels a tap on his shoulder. 

“Look what the cat dragged in.” She gives him a little shove when he turns around. 

“Said I’d come, didn’t I?” He forces himself to smile, despite the nerves bubbling in his belly.

“Well, yes, but I also know that it’s nervy. Wouldn’t have blamed you if you hadn't come. Happens more often than you’d expect.” 

There’s a warmth about her that makes him shiver. It’s comforting and unnerving in a weird way. 

“I try to keep all the promises I make.” He replies, and he doesn’t miss the little smile that plays on her lips. 

“That so?”

She fixes him with an intensity that should make him nervous. Instead of that anxious bubbling in his belly, he gets a different feeling. He doesn’t want to think too much into it, but Noah also isn’t as slow as Nick likes to joke sometimes. He knows when a girl is flirting with him, and Laurie is not exactly trying to hide it. It does feel a little silly, though. Surely, she’s just doing it to entertain him. He doesn’t know what Laurie would want with a washed up guy like him. 

He learns that Laurie isn’t the one hosting the thing. Noah spots her by the back of the crowd next to Nick. He tries not to let their proximity get to him. There’s nothing between them, if Nick ends up with her that’ll be fine. He’d be happy for them. He can’t deny that it would sting just a little bit, though. 

Noah lets that feeling flood into the first sound he’d picked. A cover he only partially decided on because he thought that it might impress Laurie. He’s been trying to pick up on what she listens to whenever he came around the shop, all in the hopes that one of the names would ring a bell. 

He only looks up once during the first song, just to find Laurie intently focused on him. The look on her face is so soft. He doesn’t have a different word for it. He catches Nick looking over at her, but Laurie doesn’t seem to notice. Instead, she flashes him a little encouraging smile. 

Noah nods to himself before announcing the name of his second song. 

Another cover. She smiles a little wider when he says the title. 

This time, he doesn’t look down at his fretboard. No matter how hard he has to fight with his instincts, he keeps his eyes on her. Laurie is mouthing along to the words he sings, her body softly swaying with the beat. He’s never seen a prettier sight. And maybe that gives him the final push to play one of the songs he’s been working on to wrap things up. She perks up when he says that it’s an original. 

He can’t describe what it feels like to have her look at him like this. Hell, he doesn’t even know how to describe the look on her face. From this distance, her eyes shimmer, and he’s not sure if it’s the lights or if it’s something else. A very small part of him wants to believe that she’s looking at him with some kind of admiration. 

She hugs him so tightly afterwards. It all feels so very cliché. He feels a little lighter when she lets him go again. It’s strange, but it all feels different now. 

Laurie becomes a fixture in his life after that. Noah finds himself stopping by the record store more and more often. He drops in when he knows that she’s about to get lunch, and sometimes they sit in the park opposite the store with their sandwiches and drinks. On some days Nick will come with them and that’s just as nice. Somehow, he’s never felt more at home. 

The early days of spring quickly fade into summer, and Noah wonders if it’ll always be like this. If she’ll always drag him outside by the back of his shirt so that they can sit by the lake for hours, if she’ll always have a new thing to show him. He can’t imagine not having her in his life any more. That bubbling little crush still sits in his chest, and it doesn’t seem to want to go away. He likes to imagine that she feels the same. Sometimes he catches her already looking at him when he turns to her. She’s the first person he texts in the morning, unless he’s crashing on her sofa, of course. It doesn’t happen often – he doesn’t want to abuse her patience and generosity too much – but when it does, it’s the best sleep he gets. The soft orange sofa in her living room feels a little like a cloud. It’s large enough for him to lie comfortably, instead of having to cram himself onto Nick’s little two-seater. And if he’s honest, he likes waking up to her rummaging around the place. When he shuffles into the kitchen, a steaming cup of coffee is shoved into his hands, before he hops up on the counter to watch quietly and while Laurie makes breakfast for them. 

He’s tried to help once but burned the eggs so horribly that she’d banned him from helping. 

He’ll get good enough to do it for her one day. 

He tries to listen to her account of the drama that occurred between some distant friends, but gets lost in how easily she moves around the place. How she stops her vegetable cutting to look at him for emphasis. 

This morning, she’s cubing up mango for them to share. The sweet scent makes him want to steal a few pieces from her cutting board, but he knows better. He’d tried it before and immediately got scolded for getting his fingers too close to the knife. And so Noah waits patiently until she inevitably has an odd piece left over. 

Laurie holds the leftover piece out to him and unlike the previous times she’s done if it’s practically at his lips already. The whole moment feels like a dream. Her fingers brush against his lips just barely. Noah has to force himself to chew and swallow when he watches the fingers dip between her own lips. 

The bubble pops a second later when the timer above the oven tears through the tense silence. 

Noah finds himself dazed and blinded by it all, and it takes him a good moment to collect himself again. He gives a vague excuse before disappearing into her bathroom for a good ten minutes. When he comes back, he swears that her cheeks are still tinged pink. 

Nick has waited up for him when he unlocks the door that evening. He looks like a mother expecting some kind of explanation for his absence during the week, and Noah doesn’t really know what he’s supposed to say except that he’s been at Laurie’s the entire time. 

“You like her?” He can’t place the tone in Nick’s voice at all. 

Noah thinks that there’s a hint of hurt in his voice. 

He slumps down next to Nick, “I think I do.”

“You think?” Nick almost laughs in his face. 

“I don’t even know if she likes me back.”

Nick shakes his head so incredulously, “You wouldn’t see it if it’s spelled out to you, huh?”

He can’t stop thinking about how she’d looked at him earlier. How she’d blinked up at him from where she’d been kneeling in front of her record player. 

“Do you really think that she —”

Nick swats the back of his head firmly instead of answering that unasked question. 

“Don’t let this go to waste, Noah. You deserve a nice thing.” He eventually says, “And if that means that I’ll have my bed to myself again at some point, I’m all for it.”

He can’t stop himself from talking after that. The words practically blubber forth from his lips. Nick seems to be genuinely happy for him, and that makes him feel a little bit more secure about it. Maybe he hadn’t read too much into the lingering touches after all. 

A week later, Noah stands in front of the record store, goal clear in mind. He thought about texting her, but ultimately he wants to ask this question face to face. Noah is sure that he looks like an absolute idiot pacing in front of this obviously open store. Laurie doesn’t work on Sunday’s and still he’s here. Maybe he’ll text first. That seems more reasonable. 

He doesn’t get that far, though. 

“Noah!” Laurie calls, still in approach from what he knows to be the coffee shop. She has a paper bag and her little to-go cup with her, so she’s just on her way back home for breakfast and that reality TV show she likes so much. He can never remember the name of it, but he likes watching her rage over the dumb decisions the people on it make. 

“What’re you doing here?” She asks, as she comes to stop in front of him, “Nicky making you run errands for him again?”

And then he loses his bravery. 

Instead of the question he came here to ask, he gives some white lie excuse of not wanting to hang around Nick all day. 

He spends the morning with his head in her lap, while she watches the episodes of her show that she’d missed over the week. If Noah’s honest with himself, he’s starting to get a little invested in it himself. He’s content here, safe, when she smiles down at him for a moment too long. And Noah allows himself to believe that maybe this is not a one-sided crush. Because sure, sometimes she looks at Nick like that too, but Nick doesn’t get to rest in the quiet comfort of her presence like this. Noah thinks that it might fix the grim edge Nick carries with him sometimes, but right now he feels selfish. Right now he wants it — her — all to himself. 

It’s almost September, and he still hasn’t found the guts to ask her out. By now, he feels foolish. But this is comfortable. He’s safe in the knowledge that Laurie’s door is always open for him — regardless of the key that has joined Nicks on his little key ring. If he shakes it up, there’s a chance that this door will lock forever, and he can’t have that. 

They’re spread out on her bed when he realises that he doesn’t want to be with anyone else. Laurie’s head rests comfortably on his tummy, headphones connecting them by a thin wire. 

They’re onto a few songs into the album, but the moment is so awfully serene.

Her hand wraps around his, and Noah swears that his heart beats a little bit faster. He can’t possibly tear his eyes away from her. Her hair is spread out against his shirt, eyes gently closed. She’s never been prettier. 

His chest aches with it. 

He has to tell her. 

He can’t sit with that unspoken confession for much longer. 

He’ll tell her. 

He will. 

He doesn’t tell her that night. The tender mood of that scene had forced him to stay silent for a little while longer. 

When they’re at a shared friend's birthday party some days later and Laurie still has her arm wrapped around his when they walk in, Noah briefly lets himself believe that he’s already said it. 

Nick had stayed home with the excuse that he didn’t feel like stuffing himself into a tiny apartment with people he barely knows. And Noah would have agreed if Laurie hadn’t asked him if he was going. 

It’s warm and sticky, and the air smells overwhelmingly like beer and weed and sweat. The music’s shit, and suddenly Noah thinks that they should have done something else instead. 

Laurie’s talking to people he’s seen around the record store a few times. He thinks one of them is Celia, one of Laurie’s co-workers, and one of the others is her partner, May. The rest he can barely recognise as familiar. 

He hands one of the bottles — cider, not beer — to Laurie before he finds a spot between her and one of the men he doesn’t know. The guy grimaces a little when Noah inserts himself between them. Laurie doesn’t seem too bothered and instead reruns her hand to the crook of his arm. 

When she’s not the focus of the conversation for a moment, she gives his arms a squeeze and Noah leans down so that she won’t have to yell. 

“You wanna get out of here? This guy is getting too touchy for my taste.”

Naturally, they’re out of the door a few minutes later. Laurie’s giggle rings clearly in the still night. It’s adorable. No one would notice the bottle of wine and the crackers that had mysteriously disappeared, but from the way she’s dragging him down the street one could think that she was feeling the scene of an actual crime. 

He has an arm thrown around her shoulder by the time they walk past the park with the lake they’ve spent most of their summer at. Laurie steers them towards the gravel paths. 

“I don’t want to go home yet.” She proclaims as they turn down the path that’ll lead them to the water. 

“We still have to finish this.” Noah offers, holding up the bottle. 

Also I really want to kiss you. 

Noah finds them a comfortable spot on the little pier. He places his jacket down first so that they won’t have to sit in the damp grass. 

It really is a beautiful night. Clear skies, a barely there breeze that cools the late summer air down to a comfortable level. Laurie’s head is heavy against his shoulder. 

They’re silent for a long while, but he’s never been more comfortable. 

The unspoken confession burns on his tongue. He has to say it. It has to be tonight. 

“Do you think that some people are just kinda meant to be together?” 

He’s so lost in thought that he almost misses the question. 

“Like fate?”

Laurie nods, before she sits up. 

He thinks for a long moment. 

“I don’t know if I believe in fate and all that. I don’t know if I want everything that happens to be predetermined, but I guess sometimes you just find people who are exactly right for you.” 

“That’s a good way to put it.” 

She’s so close that their knees are touching, so close that all he’d have to do is lean forward. 

“I’ve been thinking about that a lot lately. Sometimes it just feels so right that you think that it’s too good to be true, you know?” Her eyes flit from where her fingers fiddle with one of the buttons of his jacket back up to his face, “But what if it’s not that? What if it’s not too good to be true? Sometimes it’s just that good — that right.”

“Laurie.”

His hand shakes like a leaf when he places it on top of hers. 

“God, this shouldn’t be so difficult.” She mumbles.

“It doesn’t have to be difficult, though.” He doesn’t know where the bravery suddenly comes from, “It can just be right and easy. I — I think I’ve liked you from the moment I walked into that store with Nick. I just —I’ve never felt this way for someone.”

Her whole body sags with relief, and the smile that’s plastered across her face makes his heart soar. 

“I don’t know why I’ve been so afraid to say it — I mean, I know why, but it doesn’t make a lot of sense. This — feels so right.” Noah continues, “I think I’ve just been so afraid of what could happen if you wouldn’t feel the same. God, imagine if I’d just said all of that, and you were about to tell me that you’re in love with Nick. That would be —”

He’s cut off when her lips meet his. 

And it all stops for a moment. 

The doubt in his head is silent, and the nervous tingle in his fingers subsides. 

When she pulls away from him, the quiet doesn’t stay, but at least the worry doesn’t overwhelm him any more. 

His forehead presses against hers, unable and unwilling to put more distance between them. 

“I thought I as so obvious with it.” Laurie says softly, “I’ve been trying so hard to show you.”

“I know, and I’m sorry that it didn’t reach my head earlier.” Noah removes himself just enough so that he can look at her, “Like you said. Felt like it was too good to be true.”

Her free hand finds the side of his face, “I’ll keep saying it. However, you need to hear it.”

Noah can’t stop himself from leaning forward again. She giggles so sweetly when he kisses her. The sudden impact sends her sailing backwards into the grass. 

They’re a giggle mess when they fall into the door of her apartment. Noah can’t stop himself from touching her, can’t stop himself from leaning down to steal kiss after kiss. Now that he has her, he doesn’t ever want to let her go again. 

That night, he falls into bed with her, all tangled up and so very comfortable. 

And for the first time in weeks, Noah sleeps through the night. 

taglist:@deathblacksmoke @circle-with-me @sitkowski @ladyveronikawrites @baddestomens

[haerin1]

hcs you have for Scara? Love seeing new writers around here 🫶

꒰ఎ ♡ ໒꒱ SCARA HEADCANNONS.

note: omh ty for the req !! i did 2 versions bcause i got carried away UM anw enjoy xoxo kisses hugs :33

[wanderer!scara, modern au!scara x gn!reader] fluff, pinches of angst, mentioned mommy issues and trust issues !!

modern au scara !!

Scara is definitely a band kid and in my opinion, he'd absolutely be an electric bassist. He carries around the band-aids you gave him so he can use one whenever his fingertips get cut from the tough strings of the instrument.

Scara loves judging everybody in his classes and making people uncomfortable because he's a menace like that. His narrowed sapphire gaze following certain people with ill thoughts and a slight grimace; you already know he's judging them real hard.

It's simply impossible for him to go a day, no, even an hour, without his headphones and downloaded music from his favourite artists. Scara's music taste consists mostly of Chase Atlantic, Artic Monkeys, TV Girl, Cigarettes After Sex and he's a closeted Mitski listener.

Mommy issues and miscommunication trope with Ei. Scara aspires to be anything else but the occupation Ei suggested for him. Ei compares Scara to his sister, Raiden, without knowing it hurts Scara's feelings because she's bad at communicating and getting her words right overall.

Shops at Hot Topic and Miniso. Miniso, because he only goes there for the Kuromi stuff that reminds him of you (since you're always telling him how you and him are literally Kuromi and Badtzmaru) and Hot Topic is self-explanatory.

Adding onto the Kuromi and Badtzmaru topic. Ever since you made that comment, Scara ended up loving that specific pair of cute Sanrio characters. He now owns a Badtzmaru hoodie (yours is a Kuromi one: hashtag couple goals), five Kuromi figures and more than thirty things consist of Badtzmaru in his bedroom.

Scara's bedroom is neat but messy at the same time. The room is fairly big and he has his bassist on its stand in the corner of the room with a huge Badtzmaru plushie sitting on the floor by it. His bed is filled with your gifts of plushies from past dates or occasions.

Scara has an area dedicated to his favourite music artists with posters of their albums plastered to the black painted wall. You bought him TV Girl's French Exit vinyl for his birthday, which he always plays on the record player whenever you come over or when he's missing you (by missing you, I mean whenever you're not with him).

Everytime you mention a new song you like, Scara immediately learns it on his bass so he can impress you. You find it so cute how these little gestures of his are all for your compliments and affection when all he could do is breathe and you'd be head over heels for him.

Scara is unfiltered, cunning and a tease. He'll say whatever he wants at any given time and doesn't mind what people think at all (he fights back the urge to rock someone's shit when they disagree with him.) He's your cute little drama queen.

genshin au scara (wanderer) !!

Wanderer's favourite time of day is when the sun starts to set and he gets to have his long awaited tea time with you. You know the perfect way on how to make his tea and it's so natural to the point of when Wanderer tastes any other tea, it just can't compare to the way you make it.

Despite loving you very dearly, and he'd never admit this last bit aloud, he still has some sort of doubt against you. Should something happen to you that marks your permanent disappearance that neither you or him could prevent, what would he do? Wanderer simply does not know. And he certainly wouldn't want to know.

Wanderer enjoys the feeling of your hands in his hair. Whether your hands are soft, rough, cold, or warm, he doesn't mind. He just loves feeling your gentle and affectionate touch against his head as you play with his hair or even braid some strands together.

In general, Wanderer loves physical touch. Holding hands, soft kisses and hugs; It's all so wonderful to him. It makes him feel wanted and loved, like you actually think of him dearly. He loves it especially when you initiate it first. After that, he'll be more than comfortable doing it without waiting for you to do it ahead of him.

Wanderer keeps all of the silly trinkets, gifts and letters you've given him in a box that's kept in a very safe place where no one knows, not even you. Everytime he comes across it, unknowingly to him, a soft smile forms on his lips as he remembers the fact that he's this important to you.

Wanderer absolutely adores it when he makes you smile or laugh. He'll proudly smirk and throw in a teasing remark at this but is hiding the fact that he's just an embarrassed doll with an adorable lover. He loves making you feel good, both verbally and physically, as it feeds his ego and reassures him that he's doing great at being your beloved.

Wanderer's gifts for you are usually handmade, like the cute doll that looks like you which he got to keep so he could give you a doll that looks like him in return. He loves seeing you carry the doll around with you when you want to take it out of your messenger bag, holding it so gently as if it were Wanderer himself.

Whenever you're not paying attention, Wanderer looks at you and observes you. He loves noticing new little things about you, like the way you make little popping noises with your lips when you're bored or the way you subconsciously reach out to hold onto his hand. He adores every, single, little thing.

Wanderer often finds himself trying to impress you. If he sees you walking about, he'll immediately find something heavy to pick up and "coincidentally" run into you so he can make sure you see his amazing skills. You find this habit of his somewhat adorable as you smile and praise him for his strengths. He ends up getting quite flustered, in the end.

Depending on Wanderer's mood, he'll be very flirty one moment or very shy the next. If you manage to outdo him with his charming comments, trust me, he turns into the cutest blushing mess ever. He'll look away as he denies your question about whether he became timid or not.

🐾🍫🍮 : © haerin1 (do not translate, steal or take too much inspo from my works)

[maxcatz]

raine whispers body + general headcanons and kind of a redesign !!! or just how i view them idk !!!!!!

shirtless warning idk also there’s a 𝓕𝓻𝓮𝓪𝓴𝔂 joke in here

some yap below if you please

* I read a post a while back from @/dazeddoodles about how their body type would be muscular but it’s hidden underneath some chub and I really liked that idea but I don’t really know how to incorporate that into my drawing because I cannot draw muscle for the life of me so bear with me

* I kinda wished the witches in TOH had more animalistic features so that’s why I gave them the bat ears, tail and the ear tufts - also I thought the bat ears would be cool and them having more bat like abilities like echolocation (I hc that bards have more sensitive ears than most witches and better hearing so that’s also part of it)

* The rings and piercings are just because they’re a little queer critter (they take their rings off around eda dw)

* The alto clef tattoo is because they play the viola (ITS NOT A VIOLIN.) and the star tattoo is them matching with Darius & Eda hehe

* I honestly liked their pre time skip hair color more so I added some more of that

* I gave them a stubble because I hc that they went on testosterone (and top surgery scars)

* Around 5’6 but wears heels to appear taller (i’m bad at incorporating height into my drawings shh)

some silly headcanons

• Listens to all types of music, like they can find appeal in literally anything

• Produces their own music alongside working with the coven heads for the government and stuff (the art that Dana made of them and the BATTs going through their vinyls rotates through my head forever)

• Fav season is winter/autumn, they despise being to hot especially at night (I hc that the boiling isles has a warm climate because of the boiling sea so it gets really hot there during the summer)

• Horror movie geek + likes a lot of crime podcasts that they ramble to Eda & Darius about

• Likes Peanuts (not the actual nut as in Charlie Brown) and Muppets

• Love language is physical touch (yapped about in a different post and it won’t let me link it for some reason)

• Talks with their hands a lot and sometimes hits people in the face on accident (they feel terrible afterwards)

• Autistic, normally gets fixated on music related things and will buy every CD or record they can find of their current favorite artist

• Really good at flirting but sometimes they do it on accident and they’re really confused when Eda/Darius are flustered as fuck from something they said

[chadfallout76podcast]

"Deah Shroud!: A Nick Valentine Mystery" EXPLAINED and AMA

It never occurred to me to do this last year, but a lot of people have asked me questions about our Fallout 4 play in the last year in the Discord, so I wanted to open an AMA but also explain "Death Shroud!" and some of the broader themes involved in it.

**SPOILERS AHEAD**

Part 1: Pre-production

Before I get into the story, I wanted to explain how this production even came about. Over the years after working together on some official community projects with Wes Johnson through Bethesda, we became good friends. I took a couple of his acting classes and he talked about the Fallout For Hope charity initiative I started and asked for help in organizing the gaming community for his Alzheimer's Association fundraiser. The idea was to host a month-long digital event of discussion panels, game shows, improv and a play with as many different voices of video games, film and TV as we could round up. In our second year of his VoiceAPalooza fundraiser, I wanted to do an original old time radio show and see if could bring back as many of the cast that we could from Fallout 4. It was Wes who first suggested an adventure with his Silver Shroud character (that he voiced in Fallout 4's radio plays) teaming up with Nick Valentine (voiced by the amazing Stephen Russell). Valentine is, for me, one of the best written, unique companions in Fallout lore.

So, I reached out to Stephen Russell who had joined us before for charity work and he was all in on bringing Nick Valentine back to life! After that things moved fast with Bethesda's Pete Hines and Emil Pagliarulo joining us to have some fun for a good cause. We tried to get EVERY companion from Fallout 4 that we could, but schedule wrangling is tough, and some people are just impossible to track down or find. Matt Mercer would've loved to have joined us as Macready, but unfortunately scheduling didn't work, so the best we could manage would be a holotape (the only reason our snarky gun running merc had to take the big sleep in the story).

After having everyone plugged in to reprise characters, it was time to put fingers to keys and find the story...

Part 2: The Deep Lore

The origin of this story started with a thought: how would the NPC's and characters we love perceive modification of their universe by us? We, as players aren't the true creators of this universe or these characters (Bethesda is). If anything, we the players are the equivalent of "lesser gods", reshaping it in new ways, unexpected and subjective ways, and sometimes even chaotic ways (I'm looking at you avalanche of adult mods with realistic jiggle physics and Thomas the Tank Engine Vertibird).

It started with a mental image of the small ways in which we start out modding games, or even the first mods we (using the "Engine of Creation) actually create. I had a mental image of Magnolia doing her thing, singing away sultry in a crowded and smoky third rail when she looks one way, back the next and sees new curtains. A subtle thing, something a little startling, but in a universe where recreational drug use is met with a YEEE YEEEE WHEEEE...a change you simply dismiss as being overtired or a little too juiced.

I'm a sucker for old time radio. I grew up listening to classic radio horrors like The Whistler, Suspense, and Lights Out on vinyl records and cassette tapes when I'd spend summers with my grandmother on a little island off the coast of Canada. Getting the tone, feeling and sound to stage an old-time radio show was the easiest part of this whole process...it's baked into my brain lol. The key of course is finding the right narrative voice.

Enter: Bill Lobley. If you play Fallout 76, he is the announcer for the "Tales from the West Virginia Hills" holotapes, but before that he's a prolific voice actor, maybe best known for his role as the truly vile Jeremiah Fink in Bioshock: Infinite. He has a FANTASTIC transatlantic voice for old time radio and was perfect as narrator in the script.

Part 3: What Is Going On?!?!

I had the base idea, the voices to pull it off, but what was the meaning and message of the whole thing? I always start there. From a meta experience level, the story is about dealing with subjective reality that’s being torn apart. After Fallout 4 launched in vanilla, we the players changed that world and reshaped it with mods. The small changes in perceived reality are meant for the omniscient player (us) and are not meant to be perceived by the characters themselves...and yet, what if they were? And if they were...WHY?! The answer was right in front of me: there's a difference between something born into a world and something MADE into a world.

You take someone like Magnolia or Nick, both synths, that obviously weren’t naturally born from two people. They were conceived as an idea...a human idea sure, but still they were made, not born. Without even needing to say in the script, the Trickster from the Grognak comic books who shouldn't exist yet does IS also an idea. Some MADE into a world but not born...a different world sure, but still the creation of it. Nick, Magnolia, any synth as ideas themselves would sense that the world was wrong and being changed in a way no one else would because of fundamentally who they are and what they represent.

Everything that unfolds is because Nora as a keystone event in the Commonwealth, a focal point of the causal nexus making her a unique entity in that world. A causal nexus is the link between a cause and its resulting effects and ignore the science mumbo jumbo, because here's an example of how that works:

The Sole Survivor, Nora, listened to Kent's message, chose to answer him and put on the outfit of the Silver Shroud. As a unique figure she shifted perceived reality of everyone in the Commonwealth by becoming the Silver Shroud, acting like him and making people believe that a fictional character exists.

Unfettered belief and faith in an idea = manifested reality.

Rejected belief and faith in the idea = dispels that reality.

This HAS happened before in Fallout lore in the instance of people with horrifying backstories and personal tragedies choosing to become someone else such as the Mechanist (Fallout 3 and Fallout 4) or even the Ant-Agonizer (Fallout 3). This time however it was a unique figure who did this, a figure fated and meant to reshape the Commonwealth for good, bad or ugly.

This opened a door, the door through which another figure could influence and enter a new universe provided it take the form of something already in it...a reality side-step into the form of the Mechanist. Concurrently, the moment that happened, reality counterbalanced by making the Silver Shroud who was already believed to be real BECOME real as the ying to the Mechanist/Trickster's yang.

Now at home in reality, the Trickster found himself very much alive and unbound by story but had very little power to do much at all. He needed something more, an idea and faith that already existed in the Commonwealth with the infinite universe of ideas made, but not born like himself. His goal wasn't power, it was to sow chaos, reshaping reality into a realm for any and every idea despite the consequences to reality itself.

So what did he need? The belief in the Old Gods and a focus point of belief in the idea: a staff. The universe is as adaptive as it is remarkable and where the Mechanist had its opposite: the Silver Shroud, the Trickster needed its twin: enter Sheogorath...because what better staff to tear apart and reshape reality than the Staff of Sheogorath. There is a quest added in the new Skyrim Anniversary Edition in which you can build it for yourself with a few items: Branch of the Tree of Shades, Ciirta's Eye, Fork of Horripilation. In this universe it would have to fashioned with things FROM this universe.

Two eyes were needed:

The eye of a True Believer: Kent Connolly

The eye of a True Seer: Mama Murphy

Affixed to the top of a staff of the purest heartwood from a Twice Born Tree. Living wood from Harold, born a man who eventually mutated into a living tree.

Lastly, it had to be soaked in the tears of ages end: barrels of radiated blessed waters courtesy of the Cult of Atom.

The Trickster had no magic of his own in this universe in which to act, but thankfully courtesy of some powerful allies, he was able to make contact with shadowy cults and worshippers of the old gods who gave him the name of someone truly of faith in the old magic to make all of this work: Jebediah Blackhall, who in this spin of the universe did unfortunately get his hands on the cursed book: the Krivbeknah.

Finding allies was all too easy, as the events post main quest left the Commonwealth changed. To many, the Sole Survivor and his/her companions would be hailed as heroes. To others, they would be villains, particularly in light of what Nora CHOSE to do to the Railroad to end the synth threat for good. That's a lot of blood on the hands of heroes...

As the Mechanist/Trickster, Blackall and the Lombardos began using the staff, its changes and shifts in reality rippled backwards through time, as changing one specific thing would change its entire existence. You change some curtains and the manufacturer of those curtains only every made one pattern...the world object becomes changed universally. Tapping into the Engine of Creation to make these changes, leaves anyone MADE not born aware of them as they don't fit into the design as it shifts around them. Nick, Danse, Magnolia would all feel and see it, be thrown off for a bit before settling into the changed reality state.

At the climax when everything starts falling apart and you get everyone from GlaDOS and the Joker strolling on in, the only way to end it all is to separate the Trickster from the Staff and restore the saved intended state of reality. The Silver Shroud finds himself powerless against the Trickster...only someone from this universe would be able to intercede, hard wired into the Engine of Creation itself as an existing element connected throughout its framework and history. After sending the Trickster off packing to the moon (thanks GlaDOS), but its a little too late for reality. It collapses around them, finding themselves elsewhere...the point between the mind, creation and the outcome of reality.

After the Shroud fades away, Nick has the power and choice to roll the universe, his universe back along the tapestry of choices that led him here. They all were haunted by the choices they made the first time around, something Nora couldn't live with...that ultimately led her relationship with Danse to fall apart. So Nick decides to go back further, as far back as he can go and he finds himself back in his office with Ellie waking him up.

There are consequences to what he's done, that he's not yet aware of, ones that will become clear in our next episode. The synths remember, as he remembers...Danse, Magnolia and everyone else remembers the fall of the Institute. They all find themselves at their starting point, moving towards their intended fated position to encounter the Sole Survivor. For Nick? He's starting down the path that will led him to be held prisoner and meet the Sole Survivor for the first time.

As he'll soon discover however, things don't play out the same way this time. Moreover, while he was rolling back reality to an early saved state, he made a huge mistake and completely forgot about something and someone so incredibly important...

You'll have to wait to see what that is...

[krypt-kir]

RGB Mixtape Intro

It's funny.

Most people think that mixtapes are just little collections of songs. 45 minutes of music to listen to on each side of a cassette tape, giving you about an hour and thirty before it ends.

It's not very long compared to most playlists people make nowadays, but I always liked the physical feel of a cassette. The way it clicks in and starts spinning. I think that's why Pico collects vinyls too. Other than the obvious thing with him using them for DJing.

God. So much of my life flew by and now it feels…quiet. Calm. Not like my story is coming to an end, but more so like I'm ready to load the next cassette tape of my life.

But before that, maybe I should start from the beginning.

⏪

[bunk-bed-blorbos]

1, 2, 6, 9, and 17 (Also don't worry about forgetting to turn on asks, I've had moments like that too ;) )

(lol thank you)

Fluff: 1. What are things they both find funny?

Hilariously wrong tabloids. Even better now that they're public figures, so sometimes they'll get a wildly incorrect article written about Them, and it's always a riot Zuke: So, Who am I cheating on you with this week? Mayday: Apparently, you were caught last night sneaking out of... Oh My God, Club Planetarium! Zuke, scandalized: No... Mayday: Zuke, how could you? Zuke: I'm sorry Mayday, you know how attracted I am to humility! Zuke & Mayday: ....Pffft, HAHAHAHA- They will also laugh at harmless, petty celebrity drama, dumb internet memes, and terrible, terrible puns

2. If they could each describe each other in one sentence, what would it be?

"Whenever Mayday needs to make a decision between what her brain and her heart are telling her, she will pick her heart every time, and she's usually right." "A lot of people think Zuke is dumb 'cause he's quiet, but he just spends a lot of time in his head, thinkin' about stuff like music, art... the people he cares about..."

6. What is/are their love language(s)?

Mayday is a very Physically Touchy person. If Zuke is in one place for too long she will lay across him. It doesn't matter if he's sitting down at his drums to practice, it's canoodling time. She reacts very strongly to Words of Affirmation (See the 1010 fight), and will frequently give Gifts to Zuke of anything that reminds her of him, and squeals like a schoolgirl whenever she receives a gift in turn Zuke not only picked up on Mayday's Words of Affirmation response, but he also has that love language, and puts a lot of thought into what he says (He may not be the talkative one of the duo, but he makes his words count). He values Quality Time, and wants to spend all of it with May. But most of all, his love comes through in Acts of Service.

Angst: 9. Have they made each other cry?

Ah yes, Mayday, known the city over for taking rejection well. I buy into the common headcanon that May has some form of ADHD, and I also sprinkle in that she experiences Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria. Because of this, she can feel a disproportionate amount of emotional pain if she feels like she's getting the cold shoulder from Zuke, which sucks because she knows that she's probably overreacting, which just makes her feel worse... As for Zuke, he's only ever cried because of May once... after the argument where she broke his sticks. Both of them agree that incident was the worst argument of their relationship, and both of them feel awful about it. May especially. She regretted it as soon as the structural integrity of the sticks failed. It was the first night since before they bunked their beds where they slept in separate rooms...

Depth: 17. What senses (sights, smells, feelings, etc). remind them of each other?

Zuke thinks of Mayday every time he sees a warm sunrise, vibrant flowers as pink as her eyes. He thinks of her whenever he smells or tastes sweet, tangy fruit and fresh cinnamon. He feels her in campfire and candle flames, in thick leather and the groove of old vinyls Mayday thinks of Zuke every time she sees the ocean, or a crystal clear stream. She smells him in delicate mints and earthy teas, and feels him running her hands through tall weeds or cool, running water. And of course, they hear each other. Whenever Zuke hears the hum of electricity, the crackle of a campfire, or the roar of a great predator, he hears her. Whenever Mayday hears the rain pelting against the city street, the thunder rolling through the sky, or the rumble of the City's districts moving, she hears him And finally, when the guitar reaches its climax.... when the drums kick in and make the song its own.... whenever they discover a new rock album, or listen back on what they've created.... They envision their partner, wielding their instrument with pride and passion, and themselves up on stage with them.

[tomorrowxtogether]

YEONJUN: “It’s the one and only time I’ve ever truly been in love with something I’m doing”

TOMORROW X TOGETHER The Name Chapter: FREEFALL comeback interview

2023.10.26

YEONJUN, an artist firmly planted in the now, took a look back at the times when he didn’t feel he amounted to anything at all.

​I heard you have some new hobbies, including photography and listening to vinyl records. Is there a reason you’re taking pictures with special equipment now?

YEONJUN: As you know, I’m always having my picture taken by cameras. One time I was hanging out with a friend and they showed up with their camera. I saw the photos they took when we met some time later and they were amazing. I wanted to be able to do that, too—to look back on memories of everyday moments that would otherwise just pass by and capture them instead. The photos I take will be more than simply what the other cameras capture of me—they’re my very own behind-the-scenes look at things.

You mentioned that you’ve become more introverted and that you’re devoting more time and energy to yourself.

YEONJUN: I used to always meet up with friends whenever I had some downtime, but now it’s like I keep looking for things I want to do alone. I mean, my job requires that I’m constantly in front of other people.. At some point I took a look and realized I didn’t have a single minute to myself. I felt like I needed some time exclusively for me. I never used to like eating alone, but at some point, it became something I felt comfortable doing, and I ended up with more time to recharge my batteries while quietly writing lyrics or cleaning up my room.

It sounds like the change happened while you were figuring out for yourself what your needs are.

YEONJUN: I habitually end up taking a look at how I’m doing, so I’m usually pretty self-aware.

Since you know yourself that well, you must be very aware of how you come across to others. Is there any special reason you carefully pick out your outfits, even on just regular days?

YEONJUN: With my job and everything, I always make an effort to dress decently, even on regular days. I think your outward appearance is important in this job, and paying attention to small details like that is one way I take care of myself.

​You’re very hard on yourself, so you usually aren’t totally satisfied with your own performances, but you said, for the first time “in the longest time,” you were “satisfied with” and “proud of” your performance of “Back for More (with Anitta)” at the 2023 MTV Video Music Awards.

YEONJUN: We do the same dances hundreds of times for every song, so I can tell when I’m doing a good job or not. In most cases, there’s parts I’m a little unhappy with. Maybe I didn’t manage my energy properly, or I missed a move, or became a little stiff, and even if mistakes like those don’t show, we know. Those are the kind of small details only we notice, and even if people say we did a good job, we just feel bad about it no matter what. I feel like it’s hard to pull off as well as we do during practices because of the different outfits and our physical condition on the actual stage, but I felt like I actually was as good at the VMAs as when we practiced, so I was happy with the performance.

Did you plan every single thing in advance while practicing, like how to move your body without a single issue by carefully thinking through your movements down to the angle of your legs and the small details with your toes?

YEONJUN: It’s habitual now. You don’t think about how you should hold your spoon when you’re eating—you just eat. Similarly, the same thing applies to everything from angles to small details when practicing because all of those things have to be perfect. I don’t set out to pay special attention to any particular part when dancing—it just comes naturally to me now that I’m always paying attention.

I was really impressed the way you suggested to the other members of the group that you treat practice like the real thing for Lollapalooza Chicago, or how you actively contributed ideas on how to improve things when you were working together with the backup dancers from overseas.

YEONJUN: I think that was a result of me feeling like I’m responsible when it comes to matters of the stage. I want to be free and loose when performing at a festival, but looking back, it felt to me like we came across less like having a good time before and more stiff. So I thought, if we can’t just go in right away feeling loose, we need to practice that. And I naturally learned how to work better with backup dancers thanks to all the experience I’ve had. I’ve been working with all kinds of people ever since I was a trainee, and I learned that it’s better even for the people you’re collaborating with if you don’t hold anything back and just speak openly about your thoughts. I also feel like you have to know how to put a somewhat laid back, comfortable atmosphere in place in order for things to go smoothly.

You once said that “whether it be the biggest venue or the biggest stage for a singer, I want to perform in it.” Since then, you headlined Lollapalooza and performed at the VMAs. Would you say that, to some extent, your wish came true?

YEONJUN: Very much so. But I still want more. Humans are greedy. (laughs) I want to push our boundaries as far as we can. Playing on big stages is a significant source of motivation for me. Achieving one thing doesn’t mean it’s the end. I don’t want to slide back when we’re already up here. The more we grow and deliver good results, the bigger the expectations from the audience. I think the higher you climb, the harder the fall can be, and that pushes me to keep obsessing over getting better. But most importantly, I don’t want to let myself down.

our third studio album is about gliding down toward your dreams while also taking on the real world. Are you experiencing any “growing pains,” like in the lyrics to the single “Chasing That Feeling”?

YEONJUN: I know I have a lot of room for improvement, but I don’t really want to show that part of me to other people. I know just how much I still have left to work on. That’s why I have to work harder and why I’m so obsessed with the idea. It’s something that eats away at me sometimes, but I also know that it helps me grow, so I don’t shut it out. And that’s why I really want to capture that drive in our latest single. I want to be totally absorbed in the song when I’m performing it for people.

I’m reminded of when you were recording the previous album and you were frustrated because you were having a very hard time putting the direction you received into practice even though you understood it. What were things like this time around?

YEONJUN: It was like that this time too. Some songs are suited for my voice and easy to sing, but there’s also songs that make me go, What —am I seriously this bad? (laughs) “Happily Ever After” was hard because the really high and thin style is a bit different from my own, and yet “Growing Pain,” even though it was my first time trying something like that, was actually fine. I’m really into rock these days and it was fun because I think I really leveled up while singing it. I wanted to show off that I’m good at stuff like this, too.

You helped write lyrics for five songs on this album, and you always give your lyrics a really trendy, unique spin. What’s your approach to writing?

YEONJUN: I’m actually getting a little bit confused lately. The writing process didn’t go so smoothly this time around. (laughs) I don’t think it’s easy to incorporate my usual writing style with the kind of storytelling that the label is after. I actually thought I had a good grasp of that before, but not that much of what I wrote was a good fit for the album this time, I guess. (laughs) Bits and pieces of my lyrics made it in, but it feels like I wasn’t grasping the right feeling or like I wasn’t quite sure of myself when I wrote them.

It’s like the more you feel that sense of conflict, the more you crave to be creative.

YEONJUN: I’ve had that exact same thought lately. (laughs) I’ve also been working on a mixtape, but writing the lyrics has become a bit harder, and that’s because I’m trying to write good ones. I feel like I can’t really get going—maybe because I’m too worried about being perfect. It’s like I used to write freely before but now I have so many hang-ups that it’s like torture trying to write, like, Man … What now? Once again, it’s all because of the pressure I put on myself.

For all the pressure you’re feeling, you sure show a lot of pride and self-confidence. How can you consistently feel so proud of your group when you’re practically a perfectionist when it comes to your own work?

YEONJUN: I just … I just feel confident. Sometimes I feel like I’m not good enough and I lose some of my self-esteem, but I don’t think I’ve ever lost my sense of pride in the group or in myself. To be honest, there’s going to be some people who think we’ve had some things relatively easy thanks to how good our label is and the artists here that came before us. While it’s true that we got help from so many people, we’re the ones who made it through it all and we worked for everything we ever achieved. I have pride and confidence in that. Because, at the end of the day, we’re the ones who walked this road and made it all this way.

I think the reason you keep reaching for someplace higher without settling for what you already have is because you know that you can make it.

YEONJUN: I think I can—at least I’m confident I might be able to. You’ll never make it otherwise. You need to have spirit at least if you want to make something happen. (laughs)

When MOA recently asked you if it’s okay for them to watch the boy group survivor show that aired recently, you were quick to respond, “You can watch it. I’m not worried—I know you still love me.” Did you say that because you’re confident in yourself or because you feel secure in your relationship with MOA?

YEONJUN: Both. (laughs) Anyway, I mean, of course they can watch it. But I had this kind of confidence: “You would still love me more.” (laughs) And anyway, I know MOA is just joking around and trying to make me jealous. (laughs)

You sound like legit friends. (laughs) You’ve said you don’t feel the slightest bit nervous or any kind of pressure when you’re on stage and it’s just MOA.

YEONJUN: Just as you don’t second guess yourself or give a second thought to what you’re doing when you’re with your real friends, when we’re going to see MOA, I tell the other members “Guys, let’s just have fun!” They know and love everything about us better than anyone—everything from our personalities to the ways we sing and dance. So I don’t feel any pressure at all. Conversely, I feel a little pressure when there’s other people there because I want to make our fans proud.

What do you feel is your secret weapon for making your fans so proud? When you were on SUCHWITA with TAEHYUN, he said it’s your “charm and star quality.”

YEONJUN: My secret weapon? Well … I’m curious, too. I don’t really know, to be honest. Maybe just, I guess, that I’m equally not too bad at everything? (laughs) Now that we’ve been around a few years, I’ve heard so many times that younger artists really, really look up to me. It made me think, Am I really that great? What is it about me? (laughs) And I’ve thought about it from time to time, but the honest answer is that I just don’t know. But also that I kind of do? (laughs) If I were forced to choose, I’d probably choose what TAEHYUN said, but I think I’ll just keep working hard all the same, no matter what it is. (laughs)

When you and TAEHYUN said on the show that you’re determined to make it all the way to the top, it made me curious where you get that kind of ambition from.

YEONJUN: I used to be this kind of person who wasn’t good at a single thing. But then people started to pay attention to me for the first time when I danced at school. I was terrible at it (laughs) but the kids all said, “You’re good at dancing,” and that’s where it all started. I wasn’t ambitious and full of drive like this at first, but then I became a trainee, got a little better fighting through the steep competition, eventually debuted, faced even more competition, and step by step, throughout that process, it was only natural that I became so ambitious. I never wanted to do anything other than this, and that’s still true today. What would I do otherwise? It’s not because I’m not good at anything else but because there’s nothing else I love and put as much emotion and energy into. There’s plenty of times when this job gets hard, but I think I’d be having a much harder time if I weren’t doing it.

Did pursuing your dream have a direct effect on your self-improvement even when you had lower self-esteem?

YEONJUN: It must’ve had a big effect. When I first went to dance academy, I was so nervous that I couldn’t even sing. I couldn’t dance, either. I was really scared and had no confidence, asking myself if I was even capable. It felt like no one would ever notice me. But then, while I was there, I heard things like, “You have good facial expressions when you dance,” and, “Your tone is good when you sing,” and every time I was paid a compliment like that, it was a huge boost. I think that built up my self-confidence a bit, again and again, then more and more and more until I got to where I am today. So many people were by my side during those tough times. They became my friends and spent their time with me. Looking back now, that was both one of the hardest and one of the happiest times of my life.

Wow. It sounds like taking this path changed you completely.

YEONJUN: True. So true. It changed me a lot. It’s the one and only time I’ve ever truly been in love with something I’m doing.

You were asked who you would want to be if you could be one other person for a day, and you answered no one because you like yourself better than anyone else. What do you feel when you look back at everything that’s happened to you so far?

YEONJUN: The life I’ve led so far, the people I’ve met along the way, all the relationships, my job—I’m just so grateful for everything. That’s why I’d want to be reborn as me again. Even if I had to go through all the rough times again. Because I know I’d find the happiness in all of it anyway.

[luwukass]

OKAY TRACKLIST BREAKDOWN!!!!

so i have now had breakfast and coffee and my brain is on and FUNCTIONING lets get into this

putting a break here incase youre scrolling and dont wanna read all of this lol

so first things first i was watching tiktok and people were making a big deal about how its split up into sides similarly to midnights now i do believe that taylor posted the back cover of the vinyl and that the cd will be different but i could be wrong. even if it is split up like this on purpose on every physical copy this does mean that it is a two LP album instead of one like midnights

one vinyl (both sides) can hold up to 44 minutes of music on it so we can roughly estimate that the full album will be about an hour and a half long now if each side is 22 minutes long each track on side a, b and c should be about (if each song is in equal length) 5 and a half minutes long. side d has 5 songs on it so some of those might be short to fit in the manuscript

i have also seen people compare this back cover to the back cover of lover which is absolutely breaking my heart and im sure thats not gonna be the last lover comparison i see about this album

okay so lets dive into this track by track

SIDE A

track one: Fortnight (feat Post Malone)

okay so first of all this is obviously not a reference to fortnite the video game but i think all of those jokes are funny as hell. the fortnight shes talking about here is a reference to the measurement of time as seen down below google states that fortnight is a british term for two weeks.

according to wikipedia fortnight is derived from the old english term fēowertiene niht, meaning "fourteen nights".

now onto post malone i actually listen to some of his music from time to time. he mostly does do rap but his most recent album austin (which is coincidentally also taylors brothers name, but is also post malones real name) is listed on google as alternative rock, indie pop and synth-pop. so im unsure of what vibe post will bring to the track. i think its also surprising she placed one of the two collabs as the opening track. i think the vibe for this track will probably be either a story about what happened in a certain two week period or about what is going to happen in two weeks from the songs time standpoint (if that makes sense lol)

track two: The Tortured Poets Department

A TITLE TRACK!!!! now obviously we dont know much about the album yet so we cant really try and figure out what the title track will be about so im just gonna do a little yippee for having a title track

track three: My Boy Only Breaks His Favorite Toys

this is a Whole fucking title good lord the only thing that really comes to mind when i think of this title is the lyric in better than revenge where she says “soon shes gonna find stealing other peoples toys on the playground wont make you many friends” which is if im not forgetting anything the only lyric as of now where she’s referred to being someones partner as someones “toy” but that lyric itself is a metaphor for relationships being playing on a playground. this will probably be a sad or angry song about how her ‘boy’ goes around breaking/hurting his favorite ‘toy’ aka taylor

track four: Down Bad

okay now down bad if you dont know is a slang term to describe how badly you have fallen for someone (mostly used in a more sexual nature in my experience than romantic) so this song will probably be about how badly she is for the love interest of the song

SIDE B

track five: So Long, London

alright new track five lets go! so this is obviously seeming to be a reference to track 11 on lover, london boy. now like taylor said when she announced it this album has been a secret for two years so we dont know when these songs were written or who they are about but i feel like it is safe to say this song and most of the other will be about said london boy [i personally do not care who a song is about and it is not taylors job to tell us who a song is about and that isnt the point of her music, but i will be commenting on the joe breakup bc that seems to be a large idea of this album so far] i can see this probably being about the break up and possibly sampling some music from london boy like she did with cornelia street and youre losing me

track six: But Daddy I Love Him

okay so the first thing i thought of when i read this track title is the scene from the little mermaid where ariel is fighting with her dad over the eric statue and im gonna be honest i dont remember the plot points in order of this movie BUT i do remember when taylor dressed up as ariel for her new years party in 2019. so given what we know this will probably be a song about maybe her fighting/arguing with her dad over how much she loves the love interest of the song regardless of who he is/how he treats her

track seven: Fresh Out The Slammer

okay so im not sure what this song will be about bc i dont think taylor has ever been to jail before so it would probably be metaphorical type of “im back bitches” type of song im assuming this might be a bass heavy maybe more rock leaning song and if it is a “im back bitches” it might be about the amount of time she was single for with the ‘slammer’ being her old relationship

track eight: Florida!!! (feat Florence and the Machine)

alright so as we all know this album has been in the works at least for two years but we dont know when each song was written so take this with a grain of salt but the tampa eras tour shows were the first shows after the news of the joe breakup dropped. so this song might be about her feelings during those shows. for those that want to know these were the surprise songs for the tampa shows in order.

night one: speak now and treacherous

night two: the great war and youre on your own kid

night three: mad woman and mean

SIDE C

track nine: Guilty as Sin?

okay so my main curiosity about this track is the question mark in the title because guilty as sin isnt much of a thought provoking title to me but that fact that its a question is interesting. the current vibes im getting are that this might be a more sexy song? but i have no idea here

track ten: Who’s Afraid of Little Old Me?

okay so THIS is giving big taunting energy like “aww who would ever be afraid of little ol me 🥺 youre afraid of me?” which im Hoping thats what the vibes are bc that would HIT but i can also see it being completely different as well

track eleven: I Can Fix Him (No Really I Can)

oh my GOD this one sounds like its gonna be sad. so this is obviously a reference to the common seen online phrase “i can/could fix him” which as ive seen is normally used towards people who are attracted to hot fictional characters that usually have a lot of emotional baggage or are villains (i saw it a lot when ballad of songbirds and snakes came out about young snow) so this song will probably be about her promising that she Can fix him and really will despite ‘him’ being broken or maybe even possibly a bad partner

track twelve: loml

so i saw and rb a post earlier about how its very interesting that this is already an acronym which i completely agree with because taylor knows we are no strangers to turning her song titles into acronyms. so loml does usually mean love of my life but i think because its already an acronym it might be something different (i saw someone earlier say it might be loss of my life instead of love)

SIDE D

track thirteen: I Can Do It With a Broken Heart

this one i think will kill me personally. i think this one will probably be about her continuing to go on with life (and possibly the eras tour) post joe break up i think this one will either be a sad song or a light beat ‘picking myself up on my feet’ song

track fourteen: The Smallest Man Who Ever Lived

this has so many implications but personally i think the interpretation shes gonna use for this song will be about how the said man is small emotionally and just as a person (i doubt she will talk about physical shortness in height or other areas)

track fifteen: The Alchemy

now im gonna be so real here i have no idea what this one will be about google says that alchemy is an older version of chemistry so maybe she will talk about the chemistry or alchemy she has in her relationships?

track sixteen: Clara Bow

alright Clara Bow! okay so i dont know much about old hollywood so i am NOT the person to deep dive into what this song will be about but all i do know about her is that she was The “It” girl of the silent film era so im assuming this song will probably be like the lucky one and talk about the rise to stardom and being the Biggest Star Of The Time

track seventeen(bonus track): The Manuscript

alright so after looking at the definition of a manuscript this is the PERFECT bonus track?!!?!?! so a manuscript is normally a piece of work that is written or typed out but isnt officially published which is just genius for having it be a bonus track that probably wont be on streaming (if not for a long time) i have no idea what itll be about but i love that mastermind

that’s pretty much all of my thoughts as of currently PLEASE let me know what yall think and what theories yall have for this album i am SO excited for april 19th 💕

[princesspuppetttt]

Romantic match up for Twisted Wonderland please!

hobbies: Drawing, writing, graphology, music hunting(As in collecting tapes, vinyl, and CD's from local radio stations to find music from small local bands from over the decades, from the 1960s to 2000s that are just sitting in the radio stations closet), collecting pencils, meditation, dancing, cooking, and photography.

positive traits: Protective of loved ones, compassionate, geeky, eccentric, well meaning, strong willed, mellow, and strong moral center

negative traits: Emotional, paranoid, forgetful, profane, cynical, blunt, hot-headed(internally), and messy

likes: Giving gifts, psychology, trashy movies, philosophy, and literature

dislikes: Conflict, cold weather, loud noises, little dogs(LOVE big dogs tho), and multitasking

what I look for in a partner: Someone blunt, I would prefer if they must confess to me right off the bat "Hey I like you." Than tiptoe around it also because I appreciate it since I have trouble picking up on social cues so just be upfront. Someone loyal, I am a very loyal person and I need someone who will reciprocate what I give them. Someone calm, I am rather eccentric myself but I find it hard to befriend people who are more eccentric than me, I want them to be just as eccentric or less. Someone affectionate, They don't need to be physically affectionate or anything I'm just a very affectionate person, someone who runs to their friend when I see them at the store so in a romantic relationship I just want to feel like they are happy to see me in their own way that we both understand.

i match you with.....

Jade Leech!

- Jade is very polite and pretty straightforward. I think his confession to you would be just the same, probably something more traditional like a letter but he'd hand it to you and make a short confession with it

- I think he'd be quite fascinated by your interest in graphology! He would also be interested in your collections, comparing you to the mermaid princess of old at times!

- You could join him on some of his mountain expeditions and take some beautiful pictures. When you get home you could help each other cook up a meal with any mushrooms of other edible plants Jade found.

- I think he'd want to join you in your meditation, especially if he'd had a long day with Floyd. He would also be interested in watching you dance and perhaps trying it himself. Give him a bit of time to get used to it though!

- I think he would find your protective side very endearing and he'd tease you a but if you started geeking out at times. He'd also help you out when you start feeling paranoid to ground you a bit. He'd be supportive when you get emotional and would appreciate your bluntness at times. I also believe he'd try to remember important things, just in case you forget.

- He'd enjoy listening to you talk about anything philosophical, and even chime in at times. Jade would appreciate any gifts you give him and keep them in the best condition possible..far away from Floyd's side of the room. He would also enjoy reading any books you recommend so he could then talk about the with you. ( I also think he'd enjoy if you annotated something and gifted it to him)

- Jade is very loyal and would stay by your side for anything. He's very calm but can be a bit eccentric if you dig deep enough, although he doesn't let it show very often. I believe Jade would show affection through words and acts of service the most, but he would be willing to show you in otherways if you so desired!

[starstruck-cupid]

The Sweater

Part 5 of Unnamed Charlie fic with a bit of spicy Kirby x fem!reader

(edit: name change. Formerly unnamed)

A/n: I have noticed a continuity error in my story. Scream 4 takes place in October. I thought it took place in September. I will be switching to autumn instead of spring from here on out. Also there is Kirby x reader x Charlie at the end of this. The next chapter will most likely be the last of this series. I might make it a little more Kirby x reader towards the end.

TW: mentions of murder, mentions of stalking, mentions of theft, sexual contact. I think that's it.

///////////////////////////////////////<3//////////////////////////////////////////

The morning after the kiss was crazy. Olivia was dead. Murdered. People were saying it was brutal. There were plenty of rumors and claims about the killing, but none were confirmed. I think Sidney's publisher is dead too

It's been three days. I was more scared than ever. I haven't gotten any more texts but it seems like things keep disappearing. I don't know when or why these things are being taken.

Little things that shouldn't be missed, but things I noticed. I'm an organization mess. Everything is all over the place, but I know what goes where. I'm missing 2 more pairs of underwear, and some lewd Polaroids that I thought were well hidden.

Charlie and I still haven't talked about the kiss. I'm not sure if we ever will. We kissed once after. We've definitely been closer physically. I'm okay with it. I'm content.

I can't believe we still have school tomorrow. People are dying. Three students are dead. We should at least get a few days to mourn.

Charlie and I were supposed to hang out today. He texted me telling me he'd be here later, but I decided to just go to bed.

I can't help but feel anxious. More than usual. Something bad is going to happen. Ghostface is clearly back. I think my break-ins and missing things might be connected.

I'm laying in bed, stoned. Heater on,with multiple blankets piled over me, and a movie playing in the background. The cool autumn air breezing through my open window. I opted to give up keeping my window closed. It's been apparent that it's not working. I had my favorite candle lit. This was nice. I needed this.

I was in my favorite sweater, the one Charlie got me. He stole it yesterday, as he does sometimes, and now it smells like him.

I can feel myself drifting off. My eyes and mind go black

I hear the squeak of my window being closed. In my tired mind, I don't fully process the implications of that. Figuring it was Charlie, I go back to sleep.

It couldn't have been more than a few minutes later when I was woken up to the feeling of fingers rubbing up and down my thighs. I freeze.

Soon I feel a full hand continuing the motion on the back of my thigh.

I feel someone climbing into the bed, up towards me. As they lay behind me, a scent fills my nose. Charlie.

I feel him kiss the back of my head and slip his hand up my sweater. He lays it on my bare stomach. His hand is cold compared to my stomach.

Moving back towards him, I bask in his warmth. His hand slips up to my clothed breast. My bra was unpadded and thin. I'm sure he could feel everything. He was gentle, though. Not attempting to do anything more than lay his hand there. It felt like he was trying to get a feel for my boundaries.

When it comes to Charlie, and what I'd let him do, there are no boundaries.

"Is this okay?" He asks, quietly, unsure if I'm asleep.

I tiredly mumble out an affirmation. We just lay there like that for awhile until we're both sleep.

<3

Today is the first day that Charlie is still in bed with me in the morning. The sun is shining through the curtains. For a while we just lay there together, talking and listening to the random vinyl that he put on. Everything seems perfect right now.

Charlie told me about his, Robbie's, and Gale's agreement. I told him about how My dad said my mom had always been a fan of Gale. He offered to get something signed.

Finally we get up for school. Getting back to our usual routine after that break of not talking is so nice. I finally don't have to get my coffee alone every morning.

<3

School was the same as everyday, surprising. We have "cinema club" today after school. I think the name is dumb but I'd never tell the boys that. Today we have Sidney and Gale visiting.

I can't lie. I wasn't listening at all. Until the stab-a-thon was mentioned. I had forgotten about that. I had to go. Going it's a requirement for being friends with Charlie. It seems that we're a bit more than friends now, so that's absolutely no way I can skip.

<3

Charlie makes me come early to help set up. I don't really mind. It means I can start drinking early, and I get the best seat.

After a bit of the, people start screaming and running. Then I see Gale on the ground and Dewey shooting a masked Ghostface. Running to Gale, I begin to put pressure on the wound.i stay there until ems shows up.

Once I finally get back to my car, Charlie is already there.

"Kirby invited us to her house for an after party" he said, getting in the passenger side.

"You direct and dj, and I'll drive"

After a few minutes on the road, I finally decide to do something I should have done a while ago.

"Charlie?"

"Yeah?" I see him turn to look at me from" the corner of my eye.

"I think Ghostface has been stalking me."

"Stop the car" his voice booming with demand.

I do. I pull over and put the car in park. I turn to him, the look on his face is hard to read.

"What makes you think that?"

I show him the texts, the video, and tell him the list of things that have gone missing from my room. Charlie insists that we should tell people when we get the house. I agree and get back on the road.

Once we're there, I feel calmer. I know these people. I feel safe with these people.

Jill and Kirby are sitting next to each other, Charlie is putting on Stab 7, despite mine and Jill's disagreement.

Charlie, Kirby, and I have a back and forth about what took place earlier.

I've always had positive feelings about Kirby, but I never realized she was this cool. The more I talk to her, the more I understand Charlie's crush. I'm sitting in the chair closest to her. As we continue the conversation, Kirby puts her hand on my upper thigh, pinky and ring finger slightly under my skirt.

Then Trevor walks in. I don't trust him. I don't think any of us do. Trevor mentions the unlocked door.

"I'm sorry. I was the last one in," I quickly shot out. Kirby gives me a reassuring smile.

Charlie gets up and Trevor sits in his seat

After a debate about how Trevor found out we were here. Jill goes to find her phone.

"So Charlie, Robbie. How does it feel to be accessories to a crime? I mean, really, Dewey's wife?" Trevor asks, arrogantly.

"My life is over" replies Robbie.

"So which one of you sent me a text from Jill's phone?" Trevor follows up.

(Sorry straight readers, I had to add some Kirby x reader)

After some discourse about the phone, Trevor leaves, leaving Kirby, Charlie, and I alone.

I had moved over to share the couch with Kirby and Charlie sat in my previous seat. Robbie leaves from the kitchen to the balcony.

Once he was gone, Kirby pulled me closer to her, inviting Charlie to sit on the other side of me. She turns to us, putting her hand on my thigh.

"So are you two together?" She asks. We look at each other unsure how to answer.

"So Charlie, you wouldn't mind if I did this? She asks, putting a hand on my cheek and pulling me to look at her. Not kissing close, but close enough to feel her breath on my lips. She proceeds to slid her hand up my thigh, pushing my skirt up slightly, until she was under it. Then she slid a finger under the waistband of my underwear and pulled, letting it snap against my skin. I unconsciously hiss as it hits me. Kirby pushed my chin to face my head towards Charlie. He looks flustered, a pink tint dusting his face. I can see a prominent bulge in his pants.

Trevor walks in, making us all pull apart in embarrassment.

After letting him know him upstairs, Trevor makes himself comfortable in the seat closest to us. Charlie hastily gets up and leaves.

After some discourse between Kirby and Trevor, he leaves to get Jill. Leaving me and Kirby alone. Kirby sends me an apologetic look while placing a hand back on my thigh and giving a reassuring squeeze. Then she kisses me. Lightly, but needy. When she pulls away she goes back to watching the movie like nothing ever happened.

[loafbud]

Hrmm..... misophonia ramble 🔇

Just heard one of my triggers and I felt like venting!

The thing that sucks about my triggers is that one is common thing that everyone normally does and the other thing is also very common thing everyone normally does. It's not something I can simply avoid or minimize my exposure of: literally the only way I could avoid it is by isolating myself socially and physically, which... sucks ass. I don't want to tune out whenever someone's trying to talk to me while I'm wearing headphones.

Reclusive as I may be, a part of me does want to have at least some social experience in my life. But misophonia is like a roadblock to me for having that so, yay

I hate that my triggers is daily sounds. Especially when the chances of me hearing my more severe one is being mid-speech or if someone has a sore throat. I always gotta take hits at least five times a day, and it's physically and mentally hurts. 🫠

And it's not like I can tell people "hey the very normal human sounds you do make me feel suicidal!" That's like..... telling them "hey when you're around me, hold your fucking breath and don't breathe until I leave the room!" I'm afraid that they'll think that they've been hurting me all these years, but i'm like NOOOO PLEASE don't blame yourself for doing something normal and natural!!! You're NOT actively trying to hurt me, it's just MY BRAIN that translates the sound into knives in my hears..... idk WHY but it DOES, and i HATE my brain for that

I've never told my family about my suffering from misophonia: I've kept it to myself & have been masking it ever since fucking middle school, and I'm in my mid-20s rn

So I'm like... stuck. 🤨

Even when I have noise blasting and splatoon music blasting, I always have the hear the "shapes" of my misophonia triggers. (Like, still hear them but not at crystal clear volume)

I've already admitted... "defeat" in a way? Like, "Loaf, just suck it up and deal with it, this isn't something you can't run and hide from." So I just have to deal with it.

I have to mask everyday when I hear it: I try to hide it, but hearing any of my misophonia triggers gives me this knee-jerk reaction: I scowl, I shake my head like a wet dog, might even suppress a growl.

Like one day right before a family member left, they had a minor sore throat recovering from a common cold so they cleared it... and right after they closed the door behind them, I punched my fucking chest and had that shit sore for like... three days? "Why did I do that? Why did I do that?" I just paced around the house then cried in my room to just get the feelings out of the way. Admittedly, I almost panicked because I thought that shit was gonna evolve into something, but then goodness the ache had went away about a week ago. Again, it was only sore for a few days (my body was probably like "what the FUCK was that")

I don't want misophonia to be the reason I have missed out on life and waste my early adulthood rotting in my room, man. Its the reason I missed out on so much social and outdoor experiences already.

Suffering from this is also the reason why Vinyl exists as my fursona. Vinyl's the personification of my anger, that fire that swells within me. They're a representation for my more "darker" emotions.

So, ever since June 2019, I've been taking whatever aggression and depression I feel after I get misophonically triggered and just transmute that shit into art. I've been doing that a lot more, instead of threatening myself to put that pent-up energy into hurting myself again.

And even if these triggers do make me feel like doing something irreversible... I'll never bring myself to actually do it. I just try to sit and listen to my thoughts, just to hear them and listen, as uncomfortable and suffocating they get. I still have these, but again what I've been doing is (if i have any energy) I just put the feelings out into art. Most of the time I just sleep it off though, LOL.

Over the past 5 years, I've been drawing vent art to get my feelings out. I draw vent art for a variety of reasons, but my misophonia is one of them. I have like.... three or four that I never plan to post online cuz the imagery involves self-harm and suicidal ideations.

Hmmm...... but yeah. Normally this is where I'd say "i apologize for the ramble/vent" but...... this is tumblr: it's a blog site, Loafbud LOL

Mentally, I'm feeling fine. A tad bit better ever since writing this. Still a little shaken up from being triggered, but I hear it every day either way. I'm hoping that with time I eventually just hear it and then become numb and unphased to it.

But other than that...... just gotta ride it out. Me and my fucking ✨bestie✨, Misophonia. Who knows how long we'll be together?

No matter..... I REFUSE TO LET IT DEFINE ME. I WILL LIVE.

Love yall 🫶🏿

[the-authoress-writes]

Family

(AKA some of my Tom “Iceman” Kazansky headcanons)

Warnings: Tom “Iceman” Kazansky’s father’s A+ parenting (not), mentions of cancer.

Author’s Note: This was instigated by @callsign-skydancer, after she sent me a very insightful message, and I just had to go with it, until, voilà, I churned this out in an hour and a half.

I’ve had these headcanons for a while now, but it’s because of Sky that I decided to get them down.

I’ll be using these in some later stories, so if you see some copy-pasting, you didn’t see anything, self-plagiarism doesn’t count, 😂.

I have no idea if this makes any sense, I wrote this in what I feel is a weird tense, but I have to get this out of my head, so I can finish “Wherever You Go”.

Enough of the Authoress talking, here we go!

Family has a great deal of meaning for Thomas Kazansky.

It affects and has affected him in more ways than one, and it continues to influence and shape him.

It was why he joined the Navy.

Most people assume that his father was Navy, because they hear higher-ranking officers whisper “He’s related to Kazansky” or things like that, but they’d be wrong.

His father was not Navy.

His father is Dr. Vasily Kazansky, a prominent Honolulu cardiologist, who detests all things military, who wanted nothing but for Tom to follow in his footsteps, demanding utmost academic excellence in preparation for medical school, creating a habit drilled into him that carried over into Tom’s service.

His grandfather, however, was Captain Sergei Kazansky, a highly decorated US Navy officer who served during World War II.

As a child, during visits to his Dedushka Sergei and Babusya Anya, young Thomas could be found in his grandfather’s arms, listening wide-eyed to Sergei’s stories of his time in the Navy.

It was Sergei Kazansky who instilled in Tom a love of country, and the desire to serve.

Tom’s decision to join the Navy and attend Annapolis was what drove a final wedge between Tom and his father, who detested the military for taking his father, Sergei, from him, in more ways than one, both physically, and emotionally, Sergei not knowing back then how to handle his trauma.

It was his grandfather who pinned the Lieutenant Junior Grade bars on his uniform, and Tom will never admit it, but he had tears in his eyes when Sergei embraced him and whispered in his ear, “Я так горжусь тобой, Томас,” words his own father never said to him.

It broke his heart when Sergei died of lung cancer three months before he was slated to attend TOPGUN.

But his memories and the lessons his Dedushka taught him would stay with him forever.

Most people would never assume that Tom “Iceman” Kazansky would have an artistic bone in his body, but they would be absolutely wrong.

One of Tom’s best kept secrets was that he is a very accomplished pianist.

He was taught by his mother, Yelena, how to play the piano, and music ran in her family, her own father, Oleg, having been a violinist with the USSR State Symphony Orchestra, before his defection to America.

Tom’s fondest memories of his mother are of afternoons spent with Yelena teaching him to play the piano, after dragging him from his homework, which enabled him to play Chopin at twelve, followed by the two of them listening to recordings of classical music, some of them featuring his grandfather Oleg’s playing, his father’s long hours at work enabling this time away from studying without censure.

One of his most prized possessions is a vinyl record which he inherited from his mother, of Shostakovich’s “Leningrad Symphony”, where his grandfather Oleg can be heard playing second chair violin.

In general, Tom’s favorite pieces to play are Chopin, but depending on his mood, what he plays varies.

When he’s at his most neurotic, Bach comes easier, the precision required to play those pieces giving his mind something to fixate on.

When he’s upset or angry, he hammers away at Scriabin, and some pieces of Rachmaninov, like “Prelude in G Minor (Op. 23 No. 5)” and “Prelude in C Sharp Minor (Op. 3 No. 2)” and Beethoven’s “Piano Sonata No. 8 in C Minor (Pathétique)”.

When he’s feeling a little drifty, he goes for Satie and Debussy, or “The Lark” by Glinka and Balakirev.

When he’s happy, Chopin’s “Heroic” polonaise is a must.

When he’s lonely, Chopin’s “Nocturne No. 20 in C Sharp Minor (Posthumous)” is a standby, because of how it reminds him there’s always light at the end of the tunnel.

He’s proud to say he can play his dream piece from his early high school years, Liszt’s transcription of “La Campanella”, though he still thinks he can get it just a little bit faster.

His most recent dream pieces are Rachmaninov’s “Piano Concerto No. 2”, and Liszt’s “Rondo Fantastique (El Contrabandista)”.

It’s because of him that Bradley is as good a pianist as he is, having been the Baby Goose’s teacher on the instrument.

He wishes Bradley would show off the classical pieces he knows more than his rendition—great as it is—of “Great Balls of Fire”.

Family has shaped Thomas Kazansky for better and for worse—there are still days he can hear his father telling him an A- wasn’t going to get him into any half decent Ivy League, or that he had to try harder, that his best needed to be better, and those are the days he plays Bach, or Scriabin, Rachmaninov, and Beethoven—but it was also what made him who he was, what led him to what he loves doing, and what led him to the family he chose.

Taglist

@valmare

@callsign-skydancer

@permanentlyexhaustedpigeon88

@tadomikiku

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[dorymustdie]

๋࣭ ⭑🕸๋࣭ ⭑⁺‧₊˚ ཐི𝕴𝖓𝖙𝖗𝖔 𝖕𝖔𝖘𝖙!ཋྀ ˚₊‧⁺ ๋࣭🕸๋࣭ ⭑

name: call me Dory

age: dont wanna disclose but i am a minor so please be appropriate

Pronouns: she/her

about me: Massive nerd about everything and also a vampire (real). I love love love physical media, Sewing and Letterboxd. I love Goth music with my entire being. I LOVE MY CHEMICAL ROMANCE. My fav MCR member rn is Frank.

NOTE: Unless I say otherwise, all the pictures/gif's I post are from Pinterest and belong to their owners.not me. I will never take credit for something that isn't mine!

Hobbies: Collecting Records, Sewing, Obssesing over bands, Ancient Greek + Latin, Watching movies, reading/writing Comics.

some other stuff i like : THE CROW (1994 movie and original comic) , Ville Valo, Alternative Fashion, Vampires, Comics, Autumn, Halloween, Bats, Movies, Music, Vinyl Records.

favourite artists: Voodoo Church, Clan of Xymox, The Cure, HIM, Joy Division, Sisters of Mercy, Siouxsie and The Banshees, My Chemical Romance, Leathermouth, Frnk Iero (and more)

more stuff that might go under the cut - more fav artists, dni, please interact, fyi/other stuff

more fav artists: Bauhaus, Cocteau Twins, Depeche Mode, K1lling Joke, Lebanon Hanover, October Noir, London after Midnight, My Dying Bride, Skeletal family, Twin Tribes, She Past Away, VV, Paralysed Age, Necromancy, The Damned, Death Cult, She wants revenge, Bat Noveau, Dsjecta Membra, Paralysed age, Dead Can Dance, Rosetta Stone.

other genres I like: general goth music of any kind! deathrock, post-punk, Dark Wave, Gothic Rock etc. a bit of pop-punk, punk, post-hardcore, funeral doom.

(I listen to way more artists but I decided not to list all of them cos it would take too long and I'm feeling lazy)

𝕯𝕹𝕴!! (dni)

-adult (unless in forums) -under 13 -homophobic -transphobic -ableist -racist -sexist -classist -body shamer -Disrespecting Religions (including if you disrespect satanism and paganism) -Not respecting ppls prns -Venting without consent -bully -Scammer -RCTA -mlm or wlw f3t1shiz3rs yuck -Melanie Martinez supporters -Defending any kind of ab*se or h8 -🇮🇱 supporter -If u glorify/romanticise w4r

𝖕𝖑𝖊𝖆𝖘𝖊 𝖎𝖓𝖙𝖊𝖗𝖆𝖈𝖙!!

if u like any of the bands/things I've listed

The Crow fans!!!!

Goths and other alternative people (emo, punk, scene, decora, etc)

If we're mutuals on any other platforms!

Movie, physical media or music enthusiasts!

𝖔𝖙𝖍𝖊𝖗 𝖘𝖙𝖚𝖋𝖋:

tone tags are appreciated but not always necessary

I'm British (+British timezones)

i will probably edit this as i think of more to add and as my interests change!

fav user: @literallygeeway