#if my family doesn't play that at my funeral one day i'm not dying

[wildsaltair]

Omg I found that Cello version of "Now we are free" and it is sending me. Like... cello/instrumental versions just do stuff to me...

And of that song/Soundtrack. Video only adds to the feels. https://youtu.be/74CYIdYoQ5w?si=cA8i5OiyB3mrzu6H

Enjoy and sorrry if that is making you cry.

Oh my goodness Linnie, this is EXACTLY what I needed for a good cry after a bad day :O There's nothing like instrumental music to soothe / destroy the soul!

Ughghhhhhhh just the beauty of that piece of music... the sadness and triumph mixed together.... the way it fits Maximus so perfectly I WILL CRY

Thank you so much for sending me this!! It's so lovely and I've never come across it before. Definitely going on the Gladiator playlist :)

[aboutnavi]

I was brushing my teeth, reflecting about life, & my mind went back to AFTG and there is a scene on the first book that it has been stuck on my brain since I read the trilogy again this January and it's about Seth. Now, I know the fandom -in general- barely talk about Seth because Nora decided to kill him off for shock value and when people try to talk about him, it always comes back to 'he was a homophobic, disgusting piece of shit' which yes, valid but also, are we forgetting Aaron? The babyfication of Aaron in this fandom had everyone collectively forgetting he was exactly like Seth (even worse: towards his family!!!). Two wrongs doesn't make one right & I'm in no way justifying Seth's action but if we never talk about characters on AFTG just because they were problematic, we are not talking about any of them, ever (ok maybe some of them, but still).

My point is: the scene. Neil is confused as to why Seth hates Kevin -specifically him- so much, since Seth could get along with most people if he wanted and tried hard enough but he refused to give ground to Kevin & his answer is just so humanly heartbreaking it goes to my list of moments Nora did something right in AFTG. The scene goes like this:

Neil: Why do you hate him?

Seth: Because I'm sick of him getting everything he wants just because he's Kevin Day. Do you know what fame gets you, shitface? Everything. All he has to do is ask for it, and someone will give it to him. Doesn't matter what. Doesn't matter who. The world is dying to give him anything he wants. When he broke his hand, his fans cried for him. They flooded our locker room with letters and flowers. The amazing Kevin Day can't play anymore. Their lives were over. They'd grieve the loss forever. But tell me when's the last time anyone cried over you? Never, right? They're there for Kevin every step of the way, but where were they when we needed them?

Neil, stupidly: So you're jealous.

Seth: His life is not more important than mine just because he's more talented.

Neil first instinct is to say jealousy because jealousy is something he understands (he felt jealous of Kevin for having a future, for being able to play, for the talent, for the life he never got to live when his mother ran away, etc.) but for me what Seth is trying to portrait is more like the painful awareness that you get when you realize you're also worthy of love and care. Seth is such an unexplored character who had so much potential if Nora hadn't killed him for the sake of showing how Riko could be/was dangerous (and she could have done that in so many different ways!!!) & you can see that on, for example, Nora's post about his life. Seth was always the no-priority person, the kid no one payed attention to, the boy that if killed, not even his mother would come for the funeral. He was every aspect a Fox and he spent his entire life being told he was no one and to be able to say his life is not more important than mine shows so much development; the chance he had put on himself for being open to love, to care, to second and third chances... it was all there. It breaks my heart that he never got the chance to become something. & I do not believe he was an inherently bad person? They are so young in AFTG, all of them. Maybe Seth wasn't bad; maybe he was just twenty-two, you know?

& on the extra content when they tell Allison he died and she goes 'He called me not even an hour ago! He was drunk and rambling but he was happy for the first time in weeks. He was talking about how he finally thought graduating would be okay, about how he wanted me to help him look into grad schools. He wanted to go into social work and help people like he helps us. I know he wanted to die! Everyone knows he wanted to die! Every time he said he was done with life I walked away from him and every time he came chasing after me. This is the first time--he wanted to live.' breaks my heart.

Because, ok, Seth dies. Let's pretend it was a good idea for him to die to set some sort of impact on the story for a second. Except his death goes without much fuss. The shock Nora wanted is felt for maybe three seconds, in one paragraph in the last page of TFC and then we barely talk about Seth on TRK and TKM. Neil can't even understand how impactful was Seth's death - he only cares about how it will affect the game & his guilt is more about how Allison would feel towards him then sadness over losing a teammate - and this insight we get from Allison is from the extra content and not everyone goes on to read those so if Nora wanted something out of his death - pity, shock, sadness, or whatever - she should have put this scene IN THE BOOKS.

[cillianmurphysdimples]

Good old fashioned "about me" survey, not that anyone is interested...

name:: Kelly

nickname:: Kells

how old are you:: 35

zodiac sign:: Pisces

current location:: Coventry, England

eye color:: Green

hair color:: Brown

hair type:: Thick & Curly

hieght:: 5ft 2in

your heritage:: English & Irish

what's your middle name:: Louise

shoes you wore today:: Primark trainers

your fear:: My children being taken or dying

have you ever ridden a mechanical bull:: No!

do you want to:: No!

goal you would like to achieve this year:: I achieved them in August - own home for me and the boys & a sensory room for the boys

first thought when you wake up:: What time is it?

best physical feature:: To me? Eyes.

who is your bestest friend:: My little sister

when is your bedtime:: I go up when my boys do, so around 7pm. But I don't sleep til 10ish

your most cherished memory:: Births of my boys & the last day I spent with my Granddad

pepsi or coke:: Coke - Cherry Coke if it's available

mc dondalds or burgerking:: Neither these days, but Maccies before

single or group dates:: Single

what is the last song you sang:: "sang" haha! Erm, it was probably "Oró, Sé Do Bheatha 'Bhaile" with my 5 year old (he sings 'oh let's go to the gruffalo island')

does playing the guitar make a girl/guy more attractive:: Yes, sometimes.

what is your biggest pet peeve:: Noisy eaters!

do you drink:: Alcohol? One or two a week. I don't like nausea, and have addicts in the family, so I don't drink much on purpose

ever been drunk:: Twice

do you smoke:: Occasionally cigarettes, but I vape frequently

do you "SMOKE":: Weed? No

do you sing:: I can't, but I do

what color underwear do you have on:: Black

do you want to go to college:: I did - CACHE CCE 2 and Diploma HSC 3

have you ever been in love:: Briefly

do you want to get married:: No!

do you believe in yourself:: No, learned fairly quickly I'm a piece of shit

do you believe in others:: Some people

do you like thunderstorms:: I fucking love them!

do you play an instrument:: I can play The Lord's Prayer on piano, but that's your lot!

what do you want to be when you grow up:: I achieved it - I wanted to be a mum. I was also the deputy manager of a Nursing Home before I had my children which was amazing

what country would you like to visit:: I just want to go back to Ireland 💚

how many CD's do you own:: None now

how many DVD's do you own:: Around 450 last count (a few years ago) so maybe 470 now?

how many tattoos do you have:: 8

how many piercings do yo have:: None now, but I had ears, left labret, right eyebrow, and both sides of my nose X2 until I was around 28

how many things in the past do you regret:: Yeah, a few things.

FAVORITES

shoes:: Chunky soles - trainers, ankle boots or sandles

radio station:: I don't listen anymore

drink:: Caramel latte, Cherry Coke, monster mango loco

car:: None

place:: Cootehill, Co Cavan, Ireland 💙

song:: Angeles - Jensen Ackles and Lemon 7s - A Lazarus Soul and Scorn Not His Simplicity - Luke Kelly

movie:: Four Weddings and a Funeral and On The Edge

moment:: When my boys were born

color:: Variations of blue

meal:: Toast and proper butter!

IN A GUY/GIRL

favorite eye color:: Doesn't matter

favorite hair color:: Doesn't matter

short or long hair:: Longer - just not cropped in dead short, but then it's their hair so they can do what they like

height:: Doesn't matter

body type:: Literally does not matter!

does ethnicity matter:: Doesn't matter

piercings:: Whatever

tattoos:: Whatever

MORE

do you think you are attractive:: Fuck no - I have a flat nose, epicanthic folds, I'm fat, I'm waiting to have my shitty teeth removed, and my boobs are bigger than my head. I am gross.

are you attracted to someone who does not know it:: No they knew it but they were engaged. We talked for a while then he felt guilty so we stopped.

would you like to be someones fantasy:: Ha I never would be so it's moot

do you kiss with your eyes closed or open:: It's been 5 years since I kissed anyone who who the fuck knows?!

a little or a lot of tongue:: Little

older or younger:: I don't mind - my kids dad was 2 years younger, my last interest was 3 years older

lights on/lights off or candle light:: Doesn't matter

do you like to cuddle after:: Depends on what kinda sex we'd had

do you like to cuddle in general:: I'm not physically affectionate on the whole. Makes me uncomfortable. I like sofa cuddles watching TV though.

RIGHT NOW

what is todays date:: November 7th

what time is it:: 7.25pm

who are you thinking of:: Cillian's eyes look good in this film (Aloft)

what are you listening to:: Aloft film

do you love someone:: As in 'in love'? No.

does someone love you:: My children, I think! Probably my siblings, and Mum and Step Dad.

is it raining:: Mizzling

are you happy:: In general, not really, I'm fairly neutral

[noahsbookhoard]

📚March 2024 Book Review (Part 2/2)📚

Last post for March and there is only good and really really good books here!

The Tragedy of Julius Caesar by William Shakespeare

Shakespeare famous telling of Julius Caesar's last days, the conspiration against him and the aftermath of his assassination.

In honor of the Ides of March I finally read Shakespeare's Julius Caesar. It's always fun reading a new Shakespeare play as someone who didn't grew up in an Anglo-Saxon culture: every time you fall on one quote and get to say "oh, THAT'S where the idiom comes from!". The fault in our stars, e tu brute... I didn't know they were Shakespeare's before (growing up I've always heard Caesar's last words being "Tu quoque fili" (you as well my son) and that's apparently from a 18th century biography)

Overall it's a good play although it's not my favourite. I especially love Mark Anthony's funeral speech (it is well know for a good reason). Plays are always best appreciated live so if anyone knows a good scene or film adaptation I'd love to see it!

Veiller sur elle by Jean-Baptiste Andrea

Mimo (short for Michelangelo) is a poor yet extremely talented sculptor, Viola is the clever and adventurous daughter of the rich Orsini family. These two that nothing destined to meet will quickly become the closest friends, but this friendship is put to test with the rise of Mussolini.

Mandatory French literature read and second book of my adventures in Goncourt land! This one is a total succes and I'm glad I finally picked it up after glaring at the red "Prix Goncourt 2023" dustsleeve as if it might bite. I was also hesitant because of the period: WWII and fascism can be very interesting themes to explore in a novel but I read one too many where it was token-ish and just a convenient setting. Nevertheless I read very few book about Italy under Mussolini so I gave it a go.

From page one the style took my breath away. It's funny (he describes coming back to Italy as "Welcoming it with open arms" before clarifying that he tripped getting off the train and fell flat, face first on the platform, the image stuck with me) and it's tender, it's hard sometimes but Mimo's life is and it doesn't sugarcoat it.

This is the story of two souls that were meant to met but found each other and never let go. Mimo and Viola can lose contact for years and meet back again as if the saw each other yesterday. There's nothing they can't forgive the other, no matter how terrible. And they will do and say some truly awful things to each other because they are trying to adjust to a world that grows faster and madder every day. But in the end the two friends will always be there for each other, looking after ("veiller sur" in french) each other. It felt like reading about my best friend and me sometimes, it was touching. I appreciated that it never ever was even a mention of romantic feelings between Mimo and Viola, to me it made all the tenderness and softness between them even more endearing that there was no ambiguity in it.

The story is told in alternate between Mimo as an old man dying in a monastery and Mimo as a child then a young man, both are in Mimo's point of view. There is a mystery of sort, too: when the sculptor moved in the monastery he asked specifically to be near her. And this feminine figure is shrouded in secrecy, no one can see her, only the abbot has the key, because she is said to turn people mad. As the story unfolds there are more hints but never any physical description, up until the very end and a really good twist that pulls together the past and present memories of Mimo. I felt like I should have seen it coming. I might have cried a bit too.

A huge book crush, I am currently lobbying at home to have my sister and mother read it. And I hope it gets translated because I want so hard people to enjoy that book as much as I did.

All System Red (Murderbot Diaries #1) by Martha Wells

The diary of a Security Unit Cyborg who overrode its programming and preferes watching soap operas to working. However the scientifc expedition it is assigned to is attacked Murderbot, as it calls itself, will have to involve itself more than it wishes to.

Another serie I started because Tumblr was gushing over it. Also I wanted to get into SciFi which isn't a genre I read much of as a kid. I like my alien and spaceship on TV so there were no reason I wouldn't enjoy it on paper!

In this future projects are handed to the lowest bidder and lowering security is a good way of driving cost down. I could definitely picture it, that's basically how they handle infrastructure and equipment repair at my job! The future is beautiful...

Murderbot is really relatable. I too would love to slack off at work watching series and just checking that things are not going to hell (more than usual) once in a while. It has an interesting balance between the disinterested SecUnit with professional detachment but and the Cyborg who unlocked the emotions its programming had locked down. The awkwardness of the relationship with the human crew was really funny.

I was expecting a full length novel not a novella (my fault entirely for doing my research) so the plot felt very quick. I'll be adjusting my expectations for book 2.

I enjoyed it, it has some really cool character, good world building. I think I missed what everybody found so brilliant about it, and that's definitely on me since this book and several others in the saga where finalist or won the Hugo and Nebula. I'll probably read the next book, as of the time of writing this post it is on the TBR.

The Remarkable Retirement of Edna Fischer by E M Anderson

83 year old Edna Fischer is as surprised as anybody when a wizard comes to her nursing home with an announcement: Edna is the Chosen One, the woman who will save the Kights from the dangerous Sorcerer who rages for months in the land. Armed with her knitting needle and her cane, she will have to face this fight and maybe find it is not so black and white as she thought.

I was drawn to this book for this prompt alone: the Chosen One is not another teenager, it is an old woman in flowery dress and knitted cardigan. This was nothing I had ever read, although there is among the cast of character ye old smart mouth 17 year old. I was also surprised to find it was more of an urban fantasy that the traditional medieval setting but if your hero is an octogenarian you might as well have her fight dragons in a city!

I really liked all the little twists on the genre's cliché: those I had as a reader (the Sword of Destiny, the Big Final Fight...) and those other characters had that helped the main cast (or sometimes caused them more trouble).

Edna was believable as an old woman, healthy but with the difficulty of old age. She is kind, patient, compationate. I would have wanted her as a grandma. Yet she is also determined and won't let people walk on her toes. There is some good ideas to circumvent those mobility issue (Edna would NOT have been able to trek and sleep in camps) that makes also for some very nice companions and side quests.

Some elements were somewhat predictable but still deeply enjoyable. I especially liked that there was some chapter with the Sorcerer's point of view, which isn't usual in this type of novel. It really sets everything up for the ending (i won't say more than that.)

In conclusion a really good read, a nice twist on a genre and the chance to picture YOUR granny fighting a dragon (there is a physical description of Edna but I couldn't help imagining my own grandmother). I think the author is on tumblr? At least that's where I first heard of thos book. If I can find the url I'll add it here.

[becausewhatiam-iswhatimnot]

3!!!!

drumroll 🥁🥁 you got Luka Verity!

His Spotify Playlist

he's one of my favorites that I've ever made tbh, I've had him since? the 5-6th grade but he's gone through a lot of changes but I'm fairly happy with how he is now.

He was created for a literal years-long roleplay of me and my friends originally as a side character but he eventually became one of the mains.

He's 15 currently and uses he/him pronouns. He attends the school in our roleplay "Rise Up High" on a scholarship. The roleplay itself is set in a realm of angels and demons, and he's a demon. He has a girlfriend, named Julie, who he started dating about a few months into the 10th grade, but he knew her for about a year/year and a half before. (his backstory will be under the cut because of TW's)

Some random facts for him:

1. He was originally made to be a creep so we'd have some backstory for him, but in our recent redoing of the roleplay, he was made to be nicer as a side character and like I said eventually became a main.

2. He's autistic (projecting? never)

2a. To more expand on that, kind of a reason he was developed as a creep at first was more people misunderstood him more than anything else. He tiptoe walks and doesn't make eye contact, which sometimes led to extreme eye contact to try to "fix it" or people thinking he's staring at somewhere else and thinking he's being inappropriate. But when he met his current friend group, they got more understanding of it and it eventually led to him meeting his now girlfriend.

3. His powers! He is a demon like I mentioned and every demon/angel in this verse has a power. His power, he's able to summon chains out of thin air and use them. This has its drawbacks though, if he overdoes it, it leaves him in pain for a few days after because of it.

The first picture is him for around the entire year in the 9th grade. Over that time he grew his hair out and for half of 10th grade it was like the second picture, but halfway through the year he cut it short again and dyed it blue.

And another random picrew I did for him

tw for abuse and suicide

this is his backstory copy and pasted from a doc that I wrote for him (if there's mistakes I apologize I wrote this at? 3am a while back and never went back to fix mistakes or inaccuracies so some might be outdated lol)

Link if y'all want it

The Christmas kids and their parents were always

well known around the town.

Roman Christmas was the only demon in town that could control water; it made him popular with the kids who enjoyed his tricks and gimmicks he always did to make them smile.

Lucy Christmas, while a stay at home mother, was loved as well. Whenever their son or daughter had kids over she was always described as caring and motherly, bringing food and drinks and playing with the kids as well.

They would be your average nuclear family, as far as demons went. Their family was full of love and laughter and joy. It had always been this way, as far as Luka could remember.

Luka always had mostly fond memories of his mother. Her smile and her hugs and how she made the best food. How she always came into his room at night when she thought he was asleep to check on him. It had always been like this for as long as he could remember, the whole 8 years of his life. Everything was good.

He didn't have very many memories of the day his mother died. He remembered it was just him and her in the house; his father and sister were on a trip. He remembered being hungry that day. He remembered going to ask his mom when dinner was going to be done. He remembered the chair on the ground, the ringing in his ears, the silence of his world collapsing around him. He wasn't a dumb kid. He knew what this meant.

He remembered going to the phone and dialing his dad, but he doesn't remember much after that. He lived the next few weeks in a foggy haze, just little bits and pieces. He remembered the day of her funeral, having to hold himself together while his father sobbed on the ground and he held his little sister.

He remembered everything that came after it. After a few months, his father had their names changed. He was no longer Luka Christmas. He would forever be Luka Verity. It was apparently his father's old last name before his parents married.

He always remembered the house being clean and bright, but after his mother died it never was again. The blinds were always shut and there was always stuff everywhere. Homemade dinners were a thing of the past, the kids always ate whatever Luka could find in the cabinets and cook for them. That was one thing she left with him. The knowledge of cooking.

His father changed after. He was no longer the soft and loving dad he had had for the first part of his life. He was cold now, sharp and cruel. Loving words and soft touches turned into spat out sentences and bruises. He vividly remembered the first time his dad hit him, screaming that it was his fault and that Luka wasn't his son anymore. That was the first time he cried since his mother died.

Shortly after, they moved. Somewhere more rural, away from the town of judging eyes and gossip and pity.

As Luka entered his middle school years, he shut down from the rest of the world. His sole purpose was to get a job, make money and move him and his sister out of the god forsaken hellhole that was where he lived. His worst years of abuse were endured there.

When his scholarship for his high school was sent, he considered it the best day of his life. An out, he considered it. It was amazing.

…until it wasn't.

He wasn't allowed to bring his sister. He had no way to leave then. Shortly after he accepted his fate that he wasn't going anywhere, his life changed yet again. An aunt he somehow didn't know about showed up, proving that their dad was unfit to take care of them and earning sole custody of both him and his sister.

His life was somewhat back on track. His sister was safe, and he left to finish his teenage years in peace. (Hopefully…)

~

[tashizweig]

I posted 493 times in 2022

238 posts created (48%)

255 posts reblogged (52%)

Blogs I reblogged the most:

@hypokeimena

@villainanders

@czarrish

@jacksonmaine

@serenity-the-firefly

I tagged 418 of my posts in 2022

Only 15% of my posts had no tags

#tv: titans - 35 posts

#tv: yellowjackets - 25 posts

#gaming: dragon age - 17 posts

#gaming: dragon age 2 - 14 posts

#tv: 911 - 13 posts

#tv: stranger things - 11 posts

#dick grayson tag - 9 posts

#series: the raven cycle - 8 posts

#tv: umbrella academy - 6 posts

#laugh rule - 6 posts

Longest Tag: 139 characters

#and my therapist was like eyesemoji maybe it's because this is the longest stretch you've had in six years where nothing terrible has happe

My Top Posts in 2022:

#5

i'm downloading da2 onto my nice gaming laptop because @clashofkings reminded me that the DA2 tvtropes page exists and i've been reading it all day dreamy-sighing like "god this lore is so fucked up god BLESS"

16 notes - Posted February 10, 2022

#4

so my thing about dc titans jason todd is that if you know where his story is going (and i'd imagine that most people who are watching titans are at least.....vaguely familiar with where jason todd's story is going), you can literally see every single decision and failure on behalf of the people in his lives that leads him down that path.

from jason's perspective--dick lets go of his hand and lets him fall, donna and hank viciously blame him for their own resurfacing guilt, rose earns his trust and then horribly betrays it, his therapist turns on him, bruce doesn't think he's strong enough to be robin anymore

but the final straw for him being that he can't protect molly, and that he thinks bruce sees him as too weak to protect anyone? that fucks me up.

16 notes - Posted March 20, 2022

#3

i literally shrieked out loud in SHOCK when eddie looked at bobby and went, "you got a hundred plus bodies on you and I'M unfit for duty?"

19 notes - Posted March 22, 2022

#2

LETS GOOOOOOOO

41 notes - Posted March 31, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

reasons you should play scarlet hollow

SCARLET HOLLOW is a horror narrative game set in the dying north carolina coal mining town of Scarlet Hollow, where you play the cousin of tabitha scarlet (head of the mines), coming back to town after a family rift for your aunt's funeral. things are wrong in town, and as tensions simmer over working conditions in the mine, the dark secrets of the town start to boil over in the form of supernatural events. work with cryptid hunter stella, general store owner kaneeka and her witchy mother sybil, newcomer avery, hot dad librarian oscar, mysterious artist reese, and of course, your cousin tabitha to uncover the secrets of scarlet hollow--before they drag you and your friends into the depths.

WHY YOU SHOULD PLAY:

there are seven character traits to choose from (mystic, talks to animals, hot, street smart, powerful build, keen eye, and booksmart). you pick two, and they influence how you can react to situations and how people can react to you. i've done three playthroughs with different traits so far, and they have all been radically different. the second playthrough i did, i was blown away by how many things were fixable, or could be made so very much worse, or hadn't existed at all in my first playthrough.

going off of that: the choices that you make in this game actually matter. and not in a "you can have different buddies going into the final battle!" sort of way. in a life or death sort of way, in a brutal consequences for our heroes sort of way. there is at least one MAJOR decision in each chapter, which can end in multiple different ways depending on your choices, and they stick with you.

the characters have rich back stories, and you can tell that the writers planned this whole story out from start to finish before releasing chapter one. i just started a playthrough after finishing chapter four, and the events of that chapter are foreshadowed all over the place in ch1, which was released a year ago.

it's GENUINELY scary without relying on cheap jumpscares or gore tactics. so much of the horror in this game comes from the dread it invokes, and the implications for our heroes. in chapter four, i was literally hiding behind my hands for a large section of the game.

i need PEOPLE TO TALK TO ABOUT THIS GAME because i am LOSING MY MIND over how good and game-altering chapter four was, and i am gonna die. thank you please do the damn thing

246 notes - Posted December 4, 2022

Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →

[disappearinginq]

Kacey and Jamie Dutton and also JJ and John B :))

ooo, playing dirty now, eh? My answer in four parts: Kayce Dutton from Yellowstone:

First impression "You're the pretty one - and wow - a lot of people just die around you"

Impression now "Ooo, look at you - the youngest AND the peacemaker and despite you being the one with the most issues, but holy MOTHER OF GOD, DOES TROUBLE FOLLOW YOU"

Favorite moment Hmm. Toss up. I love Kayce, so pretty much every scene with him is a favorite, but probably between him snickering under his breath when Jamie is being Jamie with the tribal police and Rainwater in season 1 and Jamie had to come and pick him up. I mostly like it because Kayce is a very solemn character until then, and while you get that he loves his family, he's not a generally happy person in life right now; and season 4 episode 2 when Kayce trails his father out to the hot springs and lectures him on "If you die on the way home, i am not burying you out here, I'm taking you to the family plot so I can sit on your grave and tell you I told you so".

Idea for a story This is going to count for Jamie too - a fic when they're both younger but post Evelyn's death and before Jamie leaves for college, they go out riding to get Kayce's mind off the funeral and the memory of his mom dying in his arms, except (because it's me) Jamie gets injured and Kayce has to deal with the trauma of having a loved one almost die in front of him again.

Unpopular opinion That he and Jamie are the only Dutton siblings who actually seem to like each other; and while Kayce is an awesome character and I love him, he does not think things through most of the time

Favorite relationship :-D Him and Jamie, and probably him and Tate. I would've liked to see him and Lee a bit more

Favorite headcanon That Kayce had to join the military to figure out that his childhood falls under "traumatic" and "emotionally and physically abusive" Jamie Dutton from Yellowstone:

First impression Wes Bentley! YAY! Followed shortly by "you're the smart one, and I will love you - it is decided"

Impression now I think finding out that he's adopted was the best thing that could've happened to Jamie - between deciding that it was part of the reason why John always treated him different, and knowing now that John was never going to let him run the ranch (even though he's the only one who seems to have a clue how it's run on all fronts, not just cows and horses), and I just want him to have a good life with his chosen family. I like that as the super smart one with the most "fancy" to him, he still likes being in the bunkhouse, he doesn't treat the "help" like anything other than equal people, he likes doing the day to day, and I think he would prefer running a ranch over being a lawyer. And to me, that's really cemented in there when he buys his own place and his bio dad tells him to get 4 wheelers instead of horses and Jamie looks a little crushed and is like "it's not ranching without horses".

Favorite moment Oooo, hmmm. Probably in the fourth episode of season 4 when Kayce comes to him for help tracking down the info for the guy who put the hit on the Duttons and Kayce tells him "I love you" and Jamie says it back, looking a little stunned that Kayce still feels like they're family. Runner ups: when he is introduced and tells the state to fuck off for trying to declare eminent domain against the Yellowstone, and that if they want to build, build up; and when he meets his kid.

Idea for a story Same as the one for Kayce; possibly one where I try and decide what John did to him to make him the only Dutton kid convinced John would kill him if he messed up.

Unpopular opinion If we're going to rank bad things that characters on the Yellowstone have committed, Jamie falls into the 'least bad' category. I mean, I think Kayce killed four people in the first two episodes. Beth (I love her, but she is a deeply flawed human wrecking ball who is a modern Antigone and as selfish as they come) ruins peoples' lives for funsies. Rip kills people and throws them off the side of cliffs. The entirety of the bunk house lynches people (more than once). Don't get me wrong - I am totally onboard for 99% of their actions. I just think it's kinda unfair to say Jamie is the worst for something he did when he was a kid, and for being the only one who feels guilty for the one person he killed. (wow. that's a lot of murder in a family).

Favorite relationship Him and Kayce. I love them. And I have a sneaky suspicion that I will love Jamie and his son, because Jamie looks so disbelievingly happy when the mom hands the baby to him.

Favorite headcanon Either John did something horrific, or Jamie witnessed something horrific that made Jamie think/understand that Jamie was expendable and that he is truly afraid for his life around John, because Jamie doesn't stand up to his dad at all and physically runs from him when John is angry. John B. from Outer Banks

First impression "You're a himbo"

Impression now "You're definitely a himbo. But goddamn, you're simultaneously the luckiest and unluckiest sonofabitch alive."

Favorite moment Any time where he succeeds wildly at not dying just through sheer squirrel-y-ness and dumb luck - like stealing the cruiser from Shoupe. Also possibly the scene in season 1 when he yeets himself on the bike over the chain and lands in the street.

Idea for a story Hmm. Possibly one where he finds out Big John is still alive and just flips shit over everything he has had to do in the last three months to stay alive without his dad.

Unpopular opinion John B can kinda be a shit friend when it comes to picking between the girl or his friends. (but hey - he comes through when it matters)

Favorite relationship Even though I just said he was a shit friend, my favorite relationship is between him and JJ. Because part of what I say probably makes him a shit friend is him just taking JJ for granted - like "Of course JJ is gonna manage to steal his dad's boat so I can flee to Mexico with my girlfriend" because he's known JJ for so long and knows him so well that it's a "Well, duh" moment for him. Because John B is the only one who seems to know JJ is actually stupid smart.

Favorite headcanon John B has decided, even if he does become rich, if his friends don't leave the Cut, neither does he. JJ Maybank from Outer Banks:

First impression "Why hello...."

Impression now The dumbest smart person ever to be written on TV. Yeah, he doesn't know the difference between French and Spanish, but that kid with all of 90 seconds of planning, comes up with a successful prison break for his bestie, and the only thing that really goes wrong is he breaks the wrong person out. With maybe a minute, he comes up with a plan for 5 teenagers to take over an entire tanker ship from adults with guns. And he SUCCEEDS. Except for Rafe, who is the only one to give the Scooby Gang the credit they deserve and gets super suspicious.

Favorite moment Do not ask me why, but it is still the first episode when he gets flipped off the front of the Pogue at high speed and when he bobs to the surface just goes "I think my heels touched my head" as he floats there, and I just...crack up every time I watch it. Second favorite: season 2 when they're in the shipping container and he tells Kie that the only lifer asperation he has is to be a surfer down in South America and live on the beach eating what he can catch. That boy sounds so...wisftul, like he knows it's a pipe dream, even though it's just to be poor somewhere else.

Idea for a story "How JJ First Meets the Pogues" - each time how JJ first meets all of the Pogues, because it's never said who gets them together, JJ or John B, and I like to be contradictory and say it was JJ who found them all.

Unpopular opinion Ummm....is there an unpopular opinion about JJ? I'm not a fan of the woobie-fied view of him in a lot of the fandom where he's just this passive character who needs someone to come and save him. No. JJ is a storm with skin.

Favorite relationship Him and John B - they're brothers without the DNA, and I love that they can get angry at one another and fight and still 100% still be besties.

Favorite headcanon The reason why he hates the cops and doesn't trust them is because CPS has been called on him many, many times, and every time, they return him to his dad where it's worse than before.

[algumaideia]

Young Octavian

TW: suicidal and depressive thoughts and parental abuse/neglect (only mentions)

Part 2

I believe Octavian is between 11 and 14 years old in this prompt. You decided what age is more fitting to him:

Luckly Octavian had eaten in the party, so he didn't faint when he arrived at the gardens extremily exhausted.

He just lied down, too tired to do anything but cry. He was sobbing and shaking, although he didn't know if it was because of the sobs or how cold he was feeling.

After some time there was no more tears. Octavian was just laying down, shivering and chattering his teeth. Maybe he would die of hypothermia.

If he died would he have a funeral?

Maybe people would throw a party if he died. They hated him enough for that.

Maybe the party would be his parents idea.

Maybe this would be the opportunity for them having another son.

Maybe this other son would be some sort of an Anti-Octavian.

He would be a great fighter. And he would have tons of friends. He would be respected. People would be nice and friendly to him. He would be Camp Jupiter's hero.

Finally his parents would have someone to be proud about. And the legion next augur would be someone they liked and respected.

Everyone would get a happy ending.

"Tav?"

Jason appeared out of nowhere carrying a blanket.

"There you are"

He opened a small smile and then covered Octavian's shaking body with it. After that he lied next to Octavian.

"What are you doing here?"

"Thinking about dying"

"Ah"

They just starred at each other, almost like they agreed to remaing quiet until Octavian stopped feeling cold.

"Do you think you're gonna die young?"

"I hope so"

Octavian started playing with the grass.

"What do you mean by that? Don't you want to get older and go to New Rome and have a family and stuff like that?"

"A family?"

Octavian wasn't able to be tolerated by none of the campers. Someone loving him was as ridiculous as the idea of him raising a child.

"Ok, fine. You don't want that. But what about going to New Rome after serving Camp Jupiter with your friends?"

"Yeah, my friends. I have dozens of friends" the sarcasm felt like poison to Octavian "I cannot wait to go to study in New Rome with all my big amount of friends"

Jason looked hurt, like he was the one that was avoided, excluded and mocked by the legion and not Octavian.

"I am your friend. We could go to New Rome together."

Octavian wanted to laugh, cry, call Jason a liar and punch him in the face.

"We both know this won't happen"

"Why not?"

Because you feel ashamed to be seen with me sometimes.

Because you fear people will know one day how close we really are.

Because you don't want people to know that I'm more than a charity case.

Because you also avoid and exclud me.

"Because most people go to New Rome with people from their Cohort. Besides you'll have a girlfriend at the time, so you're going to go with her"

"Well, I guess it is true but it still doesn't mean we couldn't go together"

"Yeah, I guess so"

Whatever that makes your ego don't feel hurt.

"You don't really want to die young, do you?"

Yes.

No.

Maybe.

Maybe not.

Sometimes.

"No. I was just joking" the lies hurt "I've seen some demigods do the same and I had a shitty day, so..."

"What happened?"

Jason got closer. Octavian wondered how it would be if Jason kissed him. How it would be if Jason strangled him.

"I did pretty bad in the training and I messed up during the augur training because I was tired. And then in the party someone said something bad to me."

"Who was? What they said?"

"Nothing"

"They made you run out of the party. I wouldn't call it nothing."

But the rest of the legion would think the opposite.

"It wasn't anything, I was just overly sensitive because of the bad day"

"You sure?"

"Yeah"

"Are you also sure about not wanting to die?"

No.

Sometimes I want to die, he wanted to cry, and this feeling is becoming more frequent, and I fear some day I'll always feel like that.

"Yeah, gods" Octavian rolled his eyes "you cannot make jokes anymore nowadays"

Jason punched him joking. Octavian smiled. Besides everything the silent wasn't unconfortable.

"Hummm I need to pee. I'm sorry"

They knew Jason was apologizing because he would need to go through the party to pee and this would mean people would drag him there. If he came back, it would take a long time.

"It is fine"

When Octavian couldn't see Jason anymore, he took the blanked out. Why were nights so cold?

Luckly he would die of hypothermia.

[azurevi]

3 halloween tales (cater, jade & vil)

This is really random, but the ssr cards for the halloween show have given me many au ideas, so here are my self-indulgent stories inspired by them. The Cater one is especially long because I got a lot of ideas about it. For the Vil one.. it's pretty disappointing how it turned out, but I hope it's not too bad. PLEASE READ THE WARNINGS!

WARNINGS : death (all), mild mention of gore (cater), war + mild possessiveness + violence (jade) [let me know if there're more!]

the heart and its eternal weight

Cater is a cemetery caretaker. It isn't that he really loves it, but his father was one. He feels like it is only right to take after his steps.

He isn't into superstitions. Some people find distaste in his job, but it's something crucial for Cater. People, even after they're dead, should still be honored, and so deserve a hospitable place to rest. 

Everyday is a routine for him. Sometimes, though, the families of the passed talk to him about their stories and their emptiness once their loved ones are gone. Cater finds the beauty and softness in humans by hearing these stories, and it makes him even more dedicated to his job. 

It's natural to him, dying. His father was killed in an unintended accident, and sometimes it seems like his death could have been avoidable just as much as it was inevitable. He just wishes that he had had more time with him.

One of the lessons his father taught him about graveyard caretaking is to beware of ghosts. Those who recently died are more visible and intimate with the world of the living, and so they might appear before humans. Some are inhostile, of course, but there are malevolent ones.

Lore has it that some ghosts prey on hearts. It is said that the heart is the most important part of a human, as it is accountable for life, death and emotions. People believe that ghosts can be revived with a fresh, still-beating heart, and as a result the human giving up their heart will die in place of the ghost. Basically, the heart can also create ripples in the fabric of space-time.

Because of his job, he isn't all that popular among others, and he only has a few life-long close friends, his mother and sisters by him. So even if he has a crush on the most admirable person he's ever seen, he still won't make it known in fear of rejection. He figures that he still has time to figure it out.

And he's wrong. News about your tragic death spread around quickly like wildfire, and he's devastated. It feels wrong to even feel so, because he has never been acquainted with you in the first place.

Your body is buried in his cemetery, and a lot of people come to your funeral that day. Some of your family members are so heartbroken and pitiable, and so Cater offered to be their listener.

All he can hear is about the great work you've done, the care you put into everyone you met, the warmth that radiated off you while you were still alive. It breaks Cater how he's never had the privilege to know you, to experience all your graces with his own perspective.

One night, the moon is lit and hung up high in the sky, so close that it seems to be prying on Earth and the people roaming on it. Cater is patrolling with his lawnmower when he hears quiet and uncertain sobs.

He is creeped out, yes, but he's also curious. He's never seen a ghost before, and it could be a human for all he knows.

He's proved wrong once again, as he discovers your opaque body behind a giant tree. You are hugging their legs close to your chest, and a rotting hole's visible where your heart should be.

There's no way you can be hostile, and you certainly won't kill him for his heart, so Cater decides to approach you gently, tentatively, like you're smoke that will disperse the moment he intrudes.

To his surprise, you can hear him clearly, and even invite him to sit down with him. It's so bizarre -- a ghost asking for a conversation! But Cater doesn't mind as he pops down beside you. He notices how although you were no longer solid, it still feels like tense when his hand passes through you. Certainly it's because you've been dead not for long.

And so the two of you indulge in heartful conversations, and Cater finds himself regretting even more about how he never gathered the courage to go up to you. Mid-conversation you tell him about all the things that you wish you could've done and all the ideas you wished to spread.

Cater probably shouldn't have, but he is so absorbed in your ambitions and kindness that he offers to carry out all these great things for you. After numerous confirmations, you agree too to let him carry out your thoughts.

And so Cater works in his neighbourhood, sharing campaigns and donating, taking care of lost pets and cats and partaking in environment improvement. He's never felt so fulfilled before, and it's the first time he feels like he's genuinely making a difference in the world.

In times he's not representing you, he brings you up on the little hill behind the cemetery where the moon and stars are so close and vibrant, where they all dance in the dark ballroom and pulse in excitement of being seen. He wishes he could show you more hidden gems, but your spectral spirit cannot be too far away from your body. 

But it's enough.

A month passes and Cater notices subtle change in your behaviour as well as appearance, like how you're responding with less enthusiasm and how the hole in your chest is growing bigger. When he finally asks about it, he's told that ghosts generally only stay in the world of the living for 49 days, and their heart will rot away in this period. After that, they will have to go to the underworld, never be back again.

Cater is certainly shocked that the lore is more than a children's makeup story. He is well aware of the significance of the heart in relation to the soul and life. 

He asks if you'd like to have his heart instead, so bluntly and casually. You seem to return to their original intimate self when you refuse. 

"I'm already gone. It's you, the living, who should be making changes,"

So he pretends that you're not getting more and more unresponsive and less and less generous. He turns a blind eye against your wavering figure and how you can't be seen at all in the sun. He plays dumb when in reality, you're slipping away before his very own eyes, heart rotting away like nothing more than a fruit.

It hurts finally knowing and understanding someone and having to lose them. 

On the 48th day, you are already but a still, soulless shadow, leaning beside your gravestone and fresh, white flowers. Cater can still see you. Sometimes he thinks that you chose to be seen.

And he can't bear to see you go. To see your dreams go into flames, to watch such a pretty soul just - vanish.

So he gives you his heart. Alive and beating and sentimental. It doesn't even hurt a bit. 

You wake up immediately, your eyes glowing and body solidifying. 

"What have you done?" 

"What I can do to make a change,"

Time is starting to rewrite itself. Cater is going to die in your place. The space around you was warping and folding into itself, softly and rightly like a lullaby.

Just before you slip into darkness, you gather up a whole bunch of rose petals and desperately stuff them into the hole in Cater's chest, as if they can give him life in lieu of a heart, and you are sobbing and clinging onto his still warm arm, never wanting to let go.

It's all Cater wants, to save a wasted soul and to make a difference. 

And so he cradles your face, and leans in the moment everything goes black. When he wakes up again, he's weightless in the cemetery, where a bunch of well arranged roses lie on his buried body.

a melancholy specimen

To Jade, beauty needs to be preserved to be constant. It's just like flowers. They die away without proper care.

Just when he thinks he's seen all the beauties of the world and is getting bored of it, he meets you. A blooming flower sparkling in the bland, old boring world around it. He's immediately captivated - how a person can still manage to flourish in such a rotten world where everything is depressing and all man is for themselves!

You're the most elegant piece of art he's seen, and that's something considering that he owns a museum. Innocence lies in your eyes and bravery sings itself between your lips.

You find him just equally amusing -- gentlemanly, insightful and just a touch of flirtation. The two of you fall in love like Alice down the rabbit hole - amused and unstoppable, fascinated by the wonders evolving about.

But the world doesn't give a damn about love, nor do they understand your dreams of a bright future where everything is close to hearts. They call you both madness and nonsense.

"Their souls are tainted with war and sorrow. They are beyond the point of rescue. Victory and glory are all that can feed their ego,"

Jade is disappointed. War has gouged people's eyes out and filled them with wails and ash.

The two of you are the only stars in the night sky, still fighting for salvation, yearning for a better future where trees grow and flowers yearn for the sun. You promote and do your best to lift the veil of darkness off the world. 

But the sun doesn't understand either. War keeps going on and on, and people never have the time for aesthetic relaxations. It refuses to shed light on its pitiable humans.

"We should evacuate, Jade. They say a bomb is dropping tomorrow,"

Jade doesn't care and can't care. The most paramount thing is to open his eyes to the beauty of this world. He doesn't want to become one of those barbarous men, tasting dirt and blood on their tongue while they glorify violence and brutalness.

He stays behind while his neighbourhood dies away. You are the only ones yet to leave. 

"Please don't leave me, Y/N. You're the only light in my life,"

You can't bear to leave him, and so you stay. The bomb is dropped, and it's too close. Too hot. Too cruel, too inhumane. It ravages everything in its way, burning all the darkened things to the ash and bringing the only beauty left in this world with it.

Jade wails. Broken cries are engulfed by nearby explosions and the cackling of flames. Your soulless body lies amidst the destruction, just another wilted flower in the slit of a rock, deprived of water and sunlight.

He finally understands. Nothing can save the world anymore. It's gone way too far, and it will never recover from malevolence. All he can feel is pity for his world as his heart ache with spite.

Bandages around his hands, he wraps your corpse up completely, preserved underneath the layers. You will be his reminder that there was once a flower in this drought, an anchor keeping him from becoming one of those barbarians.

lifeless silhouette in the dark night

You can never recognize directions. You find yourself stumbling upon a seemingly inhabited mansion in the middle of the woods. Cold and bruised, you knock on its door.

Welcoming you is a tall man with blonde and lilac hair called Vil. His skin is unnaturally white, and his eyes seem to glow like orbs that eat your souls. But you are too tired to make notice of all these details, and he's kind enough to let you stay for the night.

He treats you with ravishing cuisine and a grand bedroom that was as grotesque as the rest of the house. Afterwards, he leaves you to rest, but not before warning you not to get out of the room post midnight.

You oblige- for the first half hour. Then you start to hear wails and footsteps that amplify and disappear. It's impossible to sleep.

The next morning, you confront Vil about it. He refuses to face the questions as he ushers you to get going, and so off you go.

You spend another day lost in the woods, then somehow come face to face with the mansion again. Vil is beyond shocked to see you, but then he breaks into a deep smile.

"It's almost as if you belong here,"

Weirdly enough, you could agree, There seemed to be an invisible force pulling you towards Vil. After dinner, he orders you not to leave the room again before making his leave.

Broken wails. Recurring footsteps. You can't bear it any longer, and you also wonder if Vil is aware of this. He properly is, and thus tells you to stay safe inside the room.

But dumb curiosity gets the best of you, and you open the door and step into the endless corridors.

The wails come from the host's room, where Vil is supposed to be. You're closing in when its door is suddenly flung open, and out runs a panting Vil.

"Vil? What are-"

His eyes are bloodshot and there's red stain in the corner of his mouth. Sweat dots his forehead. He looks disheveled and the complete opposite of how he was during dinner.

"You shouldn't be here. Get back - get back in!"

His voice booms in your skull, and you're running back to your room before you notice. 

It's another sleepless night.

To your luck, Vil doesn't wait for you to bring the incident up.

"Don't be creeped ou by it, please."

He seems very uneasy about it, but he's obstinate to give you an explanation.

Turns out that he is a vampire. One that has lived for 500 years and is waiting for his eventual death. He's seen everything in this world and lived through the best and worst of humanity. He understands people's fear about vampires, and so he resides in the remote part of the wood. He only ever drinks the blood of small animals that he hunt, and never has he once killed a man.

He knew nothing about what'd happen to him when he became a vampire. If he'd known about the repercussions, he'd never have become one in exchange of eternal beauty. Now he has to turn someone else into a vampire to end his immortality. It is only a cycle.

 Every night the moon rises and spills into his room, and he has to fight his urge to go out and taste the sweet blood of humans. 

There are times when he slips and loses control, but he always manages to get back to his senses. But it seems that your presence here in the mansion is awaking his desire to suck you dry.

You're bewildered to say the least, and frankly horrified. But at the same time you feel pity for him, for he is just a man who can't ever do anything as atrocious as hurting people.

And so you offer to end his suffering. Of course Vil disagrees. He just talked about how he never wanted to take a life, and now you're offering yourself to him? He'd never allow it.

But you're even more persistent. You keep staying in his mansion, and his sanity slips a little more every night. And you know that he's contemplating too, for he never tries to kick you out of his mansion.

"You deserve a rest, Vil. For your love and selflessness. For all the unspoken kindness you bestow on others. It is only fair that you get to rest,"

Vil has lived a life. He's but a mere walking corpse now, and a rest -- a sleep -- sounds just like what he needs.

And so he rests. Vil falls into a deep, serene sleep while you endure each and every dark night.

[zuffer-weird-girl]

You guys really thought that I would create a family for my husband to simply end like that? NO WAY IN HELL wait, hold on, you guys cried?

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Everyone who passed even a centimeter close to the yakusa house felt a strong wave of hatred and sorrow, so imagine the ones who were living on there....

It has been already three days since the fight with Endeavour that killed the yakusa boss's, Overhaul, wife. Not his coomurates neither the heroes could find the body, not even allowing him to make a decent funeral...

Chisaki was numb yet so full of rage... But he couldn't just lost his guard now like he had when he received the news, breaking down along with his two children on the floor...

Kai left his office, not having the strength to ented your shared bedroom, eyebags equivalent to shinsou's or even worse, and found his teenager son staring at the coffee table, in his (E/C) didn't show any hints of any emotions... he was just sitted there, with his forearms resting on his knees. While his younger daughter found herself just laying on the couch staring at the ceiling with red puff golden eyes...

He didn't know which hurted more to look, Kaito who carried your eyes or Kin which even though licked both his hair and eyes had the same facial expressions as yours...

"You two need to hydrate or at least eat something. Unless you want to..." he stoped on his tracks noticing his brute words and how it could affect them.

While Kin nodded and lift herself just to grab a cup of water, the little girl seemed to drag her feet along with her, Kaito didn't even moved a muscle.

"Kaito." Said sternly Chisaki, earning a death glare from his son.

Two could play the same game.

"Go. Eat something." He pointed at the direction of the kitchen and his son scoffed.

"I thought you were already planning that bastard's death instead of being around here." Mumbled the young man.

Chisaki eyes darkened as he glared down at his son.

"Those things can't be done without an actual plan. Unless you want everyone on here arrested or even worse." He growled.

Kaito seemed not even woried about the way his father was acting as he sighed annoyingly and went to the kitchen.

The atmosphere between the three was tense... Kaito seemed to lost all that angel part of his, while Kin didn't even say a word after her outburst...

He himself wasn't one to talk, he was impatient, more aggressive with his subordinates and even got into a few arguments with his older son.

He really was trying to control himself since it was his child over there, but the way Kaito always seemed to bring that topic up seemed like he had just stroke a nerve on him with a scolding needle.

He arrived where his two children were and found Kin just staring at the cup in front of her on the table with her chin burried on her tiny arms... He went to her and apprehensively patted her head, it wasn't going to change things he knew but this was better then watching his daughter im this state.

Kaito himself took an angry bite of an pre made sandwich as he leaned on the board. Chisaki arched an eyebrow at him which only resulted on a annoyed shrug from the boy.

"You didn't want one Kin?" The little girl shook her head.

It has been three days... and he couldn't di this anymore.

How was he supposed to raise two childs on his own? And most importantly, after one of them saw you moments before dying while the other was just too young to take it well the news...

"Dammit..." he whisper to himself feeling his eyes start to burn.

Kin got up from her chair and made her way out of the room quietly. Leaving both Kai and Kaito alone on the room again.

"I want to kill him." Kaito said while Chisaki sighed in annoyance, pitching his covered nose.

"He is the top one hero Kaito. You can't do that without a plan." He growled.

"Well, at least I want to do something instead of letting the man who killed my mom walked freely on the streets. Different from others..." Chisaki slowly took his hand away frrom his face as he sended a one eye death glare at his son.

"What is that supposed to mean?"

"Why aren't you doing something? Many people died because of you, but now when a hero kills your wife you just stand here? I find this quite... wrong."

Both glared at each other before Chisaki spoke, his words sounding like venon...

"Listen, just because you are in pain, it doesn't mean that you can just threw away the damn respect that me and (Y/N) taught you. Second; you're just a spoiled irritading rascal who thinks that could do a better job than me who worked on the yakusa for years already? Did you want it to make me laugh?" Kaito's confidence completely dissapeared at seing the way his father was looking at him, especially hearing the tone of voice he was using.

"I understand your point of view son of mine, but have you even thought about being on my shoes? I spend more than your age on her side and you have the audacity to even mentioning that I wouldn't do nothing to avenge her death?" He punched the wall near him, making it crack slightly.

"You're NOT the only one who misses her and want a damn revenge, understand that?!" He shouted making Kaito jumped on the spot. Chisaki was never one to yell, but when he did it was just as scary as the death look he gave it sometimes.

"Dad I-" he tried to apologize as he saw his father covering his face.

"Get out." A simple command, and just as fast as he sayed his son left the room.

Kai hadn't look on Kaito's face since then... it was already night and the two didn't even bother to look at each other.

When Kai was trying to concetrate on making strategic paths to the number one hero agency he heard a loud scream of his daughter, which seemed to be coming from outside.

He already thought the worst and started to take his gloves off, and it only agravates when he heard the shout his son had let following after.

Those damn good for nothing guards, if something else happened to his family he swears he will.... he will...

He stoped dead on his pace when he oppened the door and saw his two children on the floor crying in glee as you hugged them tight to your body.

It can't be...

"Mommy you're okay! You're here!" Kin shouted in glee as she nuzzled in your chest, the snot on her nose evidently sticking to it.

"Mom, I'm so sorry, I'm so sorry..." cried Kaito as he buried his face on the crook of your neck.

"Hey you two I'm alright really. Sorry for taking too long my precious." You said hugging your children close as you fighted back the tears.

Kai stared with wide eyes the scene before aproaching slowly... He stopped in front of you, staring down with disbelief as he trembled.

"This better not be a sick joke." He said breathless as you looked up at him and almost cried at seing the pained look on your husband's face.

"Kai..." you said looking at him as he fell to his knees, not even caring about the dirt on his pants.

"How..?" He asked already letting one or two tears fall as be felt the warmth of your hand on his skin.

You were actually here...

"That man helped me with my injuries after the attack, he has a healing quirk..." you pointed to the elder watching from afar the scene accompanied by two man on each of his side from the yakusa.

"I was unconscious those three days my love I'm so sorry." You teared up before Chisaki just oushed you three to his chest.

"Don't you dare apologize over something like that..." he growled as he let those tears fall shamelessly "Angel... my sweet angel." He nuzzled his covred nose on the top of your head as he silently cried and hugged you close.

"Dad..." kaito kaito sudden said "I'm really sorry."

"Enough of that. Is just over that thing. It never happened." He simply said as he burried his facr deeper in your hair while he let out a tiny sob.

He was owning this poor sick man all of his life for that. The yakusa in general would be owning him...

[lilyevansreyjakku]

Evermore

A reylo Victorian short story.

~~~~~~~~~~~~

Warning it's long very long it's a feed back of Ben's past .

Hope y'all like it !forgive my spelling errors.

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For those who haven't read part one of this story please do check out in the likin below 👇

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Ben solo left home at the age of 15 years old after the incident with his uncle and his differences with his father . Ben discovers the dark secret that his mother had hidden from him all these years , In anger Ben  leaves his family and home , Ben join the first order under the commands of snoke . Ben goes by the name of kylo ren as well the master of the Knights of ren sending terror all around the cities and towns . after few years under the control of snoke kylo leaves the first order and goes into hiding .

later, Ben studies and  becomes a doctor who sometimes goes as volunteer in the frontline to nurse the wounded soldiers of the resistance .  one day the priest of Chandrila lor san tekka found him , the priest told him about his family and what had happened over the years . captain Han solo his father had fallen ill and his mother had aged wishing one thing that her son comes back home.

“ Ben “, the priest insisted.

“ no ! I'm not Ben here san tekka , I'm jace and no I'm not coming back home “.

“ do reconsider son your father is ill… he only has few months to live as your mother lady Leia needs you she isn't young like she was ,no doubt she is still the same strong and doesn't like to be seen old either but having your father ill has aged her and also not knowing about her son “.

Ben didn't say anything he couldn't he remembered when he use to play with his father and ran into the captain arms, he used to see Han riding his white horse falcon . Ben wanted to be like his father when he grew up .  just by thinking about it was already hurting too much .

“They lied to me !” , San tekka could hear anger in his voice but also pain.

“ I know son , I know what happened that night ! When you left but your a grown man now do leave pain and resentment aside son ! They need you do it at least for your mother who only did was to protect you from the truth! Which in the end cost her dearly she lost her son.” Ben turned to face the window the pain came back to him the memories his uncle who try to …

“ stop thinking about the past and think what is coming ahead son I have faith that you will come one day not the same no one is telling you to change but to come back to a home and find your mother who only wishes like any mother to see her son . Ben turned to say something but san tekka wasn't there anymore .

Lady Leia was looking at the window in her home in Chandrila in her husband's bedroom when one of her maids Bazine knocked .

“ my lady the priest is down stairs in the front hall waiting “.

“I'll be there in a few moments , thank you … do stay with the master while I go down stairs “ , Bazine Netal bow “Yes my lady “.

“ father san tekka !” , Leia ran to lor san tekka .

“How is he ?” Leia didn't say anything only stood silent .

“ Ben , I found him “ the priest said leia's eyes light up its was like life was given to her .

“ Ben ! My son Ben …. Where is he ? How is he ? I want see him “. Leia began to walk outside the priest stopped her .

“ my lady I didn't bring him with me he isn't a boy anymore , he is a grown man now he takes his own decisions”.

“ I want to see him , why he didn't come back ? I want to see him do tell me where is he !”.leia wanted to see her son she couldn't wait anymore .

“ you will see him again my lady just wait my lady “.

“ no ! I want to see him I want to hug him ask him so many things “.

“ I promise there will be time my lady he already knows about what's happening about Han and you “.leia just smiled and began to cry .

“ Ben “ , a breathless voice whispered in the room it was from the captain Han solo who still Delirious from a sickness “ son , don't go please !”. Leia was there doing anything,  what could she do ? The medicine didn't do anything anymore.

“ Han don't , don't use your strength “. Leia whispered to her husband while holding his hand . Lor san tekka only pray for a miracle to happen .

When one one of the maids bazine shouted ” the young master is here ! The young master is here !”  , lor san tekka went to the window and saw a young man on a black horse riding like the speed of light.

“ Ben “  leia smiled as she planted a kissed on top of her husband's hand . as Ben got off from his horse everything just stood still and silent .

Ben enter the mansion that once was his home it looked the same but old and  gloomy he walked towards the stairs when lady bazine one of the maids of the house and childhood friend she also changed beautiful indeed like always but not his taste.

“ sir “ , bazine bow to Ben who she hasn't seen in years , he looked handsome like the first day she came to the mansion with her father ,If only he knew .

“Bazine how are ?” , bazine smiled she felt excited to have him here in front of her  .

“Very well sir , may I take to your father's bedroom “.

“ Yes , please “ Ben follow her down the hall even thought it was day , a little bit of rey of light peak through the curtains.

Leia stood up Ben her son was here in front of her after 15 years, she slowly got up still not believing that her son was here in the room .leia took her son's face in her hand and caressed his cheek “ Ben ,my Ben “. Ben just stood there his mother was very old she doesn't look the same as the day he left her nor his father who now was dieing in his bed.

“ Ben, you came !” Leia embrace her son she didn't care if her son didn't love her ,  she was full of joy that her son was here after 15 years.

“ come “ , Leia pulled her son as they took few steps closer to Han's bed . lor san tekka study every step Ben  took , he knew that none of this was easy for the boy he just came back after so long and found his parents not the same older mother who had gone through difficult times and a father dying in his bed .  Ben didn't say anything not a word just shock and confusion was written all over the poor boy face’s .

The priest walked closer where Han was , he wasn't anymore the brave captain Ben knew once there was a old man dying in pain but stubborn to stay a little bit longer.

“ Han, your son is here , he came to see you“, lor san tekka whispered  Han just moan softly.

“ Ben” , it came out like a gasp of air. “My son is here ? Tell him to come “ . Leia pulled her son closer.

“ son , please do forgive me if I ever hurted you or treated you unfair . I was just protecting you from all…. pain son but seems  I was the one who was causing you pain .” Han cough and cough Leia whipped the sweat from Han's forehead .

“ take care of your mother and forgive her son “  han took his last breath he died peacefully leaving Leia heartbroken .

Han had left Ben as his only heir left him lands and a ranch . Ben didn't know what to do he just wanted to leave but couldn't . few days went by Han's funeral was calm and peaceful a lot of people had come from chandrila and takodana giving their consultants to his mother. He wasn't present for his father funeral he was locked in his father's office thinking what he was going to do .

Months went by Ben was preparing to go out off town leaving strict instructions to the maids to take care of his mother . "son where are you going? Please don't leave! " ,Leia panic , Ben saw this and started to explain " mother , please I'm going out no need to panic I'm going out of town I'm going through takodana and talk with the man who is in charge of the money of the business I checked the books and found something that I didn't like ."

"Just be careful son and come home ". Ben put his coat and left Leia in the stairs .

"I'll be back in the afternoon" .

Ben was walking through takodana when he saw her ..the "girl" she was the most beautiful girl he had ever seen . she was slim ,tant skin she had freckles that kissed all over her skin brown eyes which reminded of him in spring. He stopped and stare at her . she must have been around teens or older he couldn't explain the feeling he was having with this girl . The young girl notice he stare at him in confused but shyness was written all over her face . the girl panic and disappear inside the gates is this her home ? where she lived ?

Ben whispered "who are you ?" , Ben was going to find out who was this girl the one who captured his heart .

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Like always my antis and mean people no drama nor harassment no negative stuff . if it's not your type keep scrolling down and don't lose my time either . no drama✌🖤 peace .

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[donghyuckcuyhgnod]

MESSAGE IN A BOTTLE. (TWO)

mark lee x fem!oc

genre » angst

warnings » illness/cancer, major character death, swearing

tilly williams had wrote a letter to her first and only love, mark, shortly before her passing. she disposed of it in quite a peculiar way.

wc » 1k words

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hey, mark? try and move on, please. i know i already said it, but i don't want you to dwell on me. i want you to live on with your life, because i know that you're destined for greatness. and i don't want my death to stop you from achieving your goals. i want you to continue writing songs, because i know you'll get signed and i know you'll make it big as an artist like you've always wanted. your talent is amazing, mark. don't let the devil (this goddamn cancer) ruin it. alright?

"mark, this is amazing. how did you make it sound so. . . unlike me?" i chuckled, watching the computer screen as the video of mark practicing his newly written rap played. mark had written me a special rap, one that he calls his 'masterpiece.'

"tilly, this rap isn’t unlike you, it’s exactly you," he said, laughing lightly. i shrugged, playfully rolling my eyes as i continued watching it. it flowed beautifully (as mark’s raps always did), and the words and rhymes he used made it sound like a professional song. mark was amazingly talented, and i loved the way he always put love and passion into his music.

"beautiful song for a beautiful girl," mark chuckled, sighing as i tilted my head at him. "lee, i know i'm dying, but don't get all cliché on me," i taunted. he leaned closer, lifting up my chin ever so slightly with his index finger.

"just because it's cliché doesn't mean it's untrue," he whispered. i lightly smiled, turning my attention away from him and the way he made me blush. it was crazy, how something so little could make me go absolutely fucking insane.

"so, why'd you write me this, anyways?" i asked, pausing the video as i turned to him again.

"i don't know. just to. . . have," he trailed, giving me a soft smile. i returned the gesture, connecting my lips to his for a quick second. "it's beautiful, mark," i said, squinting my eyes at the boy as i smiled brightly. it truly was beautiful, and i thanked god for everything that mark had done for me. not just the song, but for everything.

"thanks. your mom wants me to, uh, perform it. y'know, at your. . ." he stopped, realizing his words. it's like he forgot about the whole cancer ordeal, and how his girlfriend is going to die in the matter of days. and as his voice trailed, his eyes became glossy.

"my funeral?" i finished for him, saddened to see him so upset. it sank in that it was really happening. i was really going to die. i urged mark not to cry again, and he thankfully obliged. although, i could tell he had extreme difficulty.

and really, i did, too. but i didn't want my last two weeks of living to be full of grieving; i wanted it to be happy, despite the known outcome. and i never really cried about it because it was a waste of time. crying was a waste of time.

it's not like crying would do any good for me, it's not going to cure my sickness or even lessen the pain or even give me more time. it's just a useless thing that people do when they have no other ideas to occupy themselves from sadness. but me? i didn't want that. i wanted to occupy myself with my friends and my family, doing the things i've always wanted to do or the things i love most.

i was going to die, and no matter how fucking hard it was, i had to accept it. i didn't want mark or my parents to remember me as someone who brought pain into their lives by leaving the world. i wanted them to remember me for the fun we had.

when they feel sad in the future, i don't want them to think of me and wish i was there. i want them to think of me and know that i wish them the best and all of the happiness they deserve. and i hope i accomplished that.

mark, the love of my life. my best friend, my other half, my soulmate. please know that if it was up to me, i would stop time just to be with you for longer. even one fucking day would satisfy me. a thousand years isn't enough time with you, my love. it's not. i could spend forever talking to you, and looking at you, and overall just being with you. so until we meet again, i want you to know that i love you. i know that i've said it at least a trillion billion times in this stupid letter, but you need to know it. oh, fuck! you're walking back, i can see you. you're coming!!!! fuck, i gotta hurry this up. damn, mark. you have a lot of food!! it's gonna get all sandy! you dumbass! crap, you're close! okay, so one last thing before i go: i know that writing this is probably pointless. you're probably never going to find this, considering i'm putting it into the goddamn ocean. but if you do, if you just so happen to stumble upon this stupid ass letter, i want you to know one thing: i'm watching you. as creepy as it sounds, i am. i'll be watching over you when you graduate college. when you start your first day of recording for the album i know you’ll get signed for, or when you have your first ever performance that i know you’ll be nervous for. when you meet your new love, and when you get married. i'll watch over her, too. because if she's going to treat you any less than you deserve, i'll let you know. i don't know how, but i will. and i'll protect your children, mark. i'll guide them always and when they're mad at you for some stupid parent-teenager reason, i'll let them know how amazing you are. i'll be there for you, always. just like you were for me.

love always and forever,

tilly williams.

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