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Sunsets and footballers (Part 98)
Lucy Bronze x Reader (74) / Alexia Putellas x Character (50)
Masterlist (other parts here)
((6.2k))
Due to popular demand, I'm going to post a chapter every Sunday night until we hit Part 100!
YFN POV
YFN felt sick. She looked over at Ridley who was having far too many conversations with Beckett and Duce without saying words. It was fascinating, and terrifying just how well they communicated.
They were both such intimidating people also, though they felt safe. Like protectors. Even of her and Lucy. She’d caught eyes with them a few times since they met, and they were always polite yet on edge. Sort of like Ridley. Something that years of horrors would do to a person.
“Any other information?” Ridley asked, and she knew it was for their sake more than the military personnel standing around the table.
“From the intelligence… he’s travelling. Departed Spain.” She looked up and to Alexia. “As he is the head of his father’s cartel now, he has a wide network of people. We’ll keep protection on your family and friends in Spain.”
Silence. Alexia looked as if she didn’t know what to say but at least that was a little peace of mind for her.
Ridley looked at her watch. “It’s 11pm. He’ll be here early hours this morning.”
“I’ve got it covered,” Duce said, hard, her eyes focussing back on the screen.
Ridley and Beckett shared another look, and he took out his phone to make a call.
“You should enjoy your party,” he murmured to the three he didn’t know so well.
Ridley took Alexia’s hand and entwined their fingers. Her eyes caught Alexia’s reflecting an adoration she’d never seen from her before. YFN couldn’t help feel so overwhelmed with happiness for her friend, and Alexia, who she had grown close to. It was clear that their time away together had been exactly what was needed for the both of them to explore each other.
She subconsciously pressed her body back into Lucy to feel her there. Lucy reacted like she always did and reciprocated, finding her hips and holding on.
Her hands were so soft yet strong. Warm. Comforting. She felt… safe.
Ridley looked at the pair over Alexia’s shoulder.
“Blue, Bronze – come.” She directed.
She immediately followed as she knew it was to give Duce and Beckett privacy to do what they needed to do. Ridley walked slow so YFN could keep up, slowly stepping to press weight onto her braced leg and rolling through it, Lucy’s hands steady on her hips as she did so.
Ridley led them towards the dance floor in the crowded room. As they started moving through the sea of people dancing, Alexia reached back to take YFN’s good hand; and Lucy was right behind her, hands now around her waist and elbows out to make sure no one would accidentally bump into her with her sling.
They reached the middle of the dance floor and Ridley stopped, turned to Alexia and surprised them all by putting her hands on her waist and pulling her so close their bodies were pressed up against each other. After the surprise passed, Alexia draped her hands around her neck, leant into her and pressed her cheek against Ridley’s, closing her eyes as they swayed.
Christ, they really were going all out. God, they were so perfect for each other.
Lucy got the idea and came around YFN, wrapping her arms around her and pulling her close as possible with her arm in the way. Her head pressed against Lucy’s strong collarbone. She smelt like home.
“Everything will be okay, little one.” She murmured quietly, knowing she was worrying about the situation.
It seemed like a cut and dry operation. A false location. The best of the best in the country closing around Bashir to capture him. Lumos’s event would go untouched. Everyone would be safe.
She turned her head slightly to see the couple next to her. Ridley’s head was still on Alexia’s, and her eyes still closed as they swayed. She wondered if Alexia knew how important that little detail was for the Australian.
Ridley trusted her. Completely.
Alexia was looking over at them with furrowed eyebrows, the worry was clear in her eyes, and she knew why.
Ridley was worried. And that scared them both.
“Riddles…”
Ridley sighed softly and opened her eyes. “Mmn?”
“Talk to me…”
Ridley didn’t want to talk, and she knew that. But she’d also grown lately, and in particular, as of late with Alexia. “I just want to be around the people important to me at the moment…”
YFN’s heart softened similar to how Alexia’s face did. She turned her head and pressed her lips to her cheek, holding them there for a time. “I love you,” she whispered, nuzzling her cheek lightly.
Ridley gripped her tighter, her arms wrapping around the footballer as if trying to protect her with her own body. Exactly how Lucy did with her.
It felt like… Ridley knew something they didn’t.
The couple’s swayed together a little longer until YFN’s leg was getting tired and she needed to stop.
“What is it, little one?” Lucy asked, always knowing when she was uncomfortable. She pulled back and looked down. “Is it your leg?”
“It’s getting sore.” She admitted. She looked around at the drunk football players and friends of who were dancing around them and didn’t like her chance of escaping the area.
“Come here.” Lucy cooed. She pulled YFN’s good arm around her neck and bent down to grab the back of her thighs, hoisting her up onto her.
“Luce.. your knee.”
Lucy only responded with a reassuring kiss to her jaw as she carried her from the dance floor. She exchanged glances over Lucy’s shoulder with Ridley and Alexia and when they started to follow, YFN gestured to stay where they were. To stay in their happy place. She gave Ridley a wink which was responded to with small smile full of conflicting emotion.
Oh, Riddles.
“Everything okay?” Jordan asked, coming over worried when she saw Lucy carrying her.
“I’m just getting a little sore.” She admitted, a bit embarrassed as her footballer placed her gently on a high stool at their table and started to knead the tense areas of her thigh. She immediately changed the subject. “How’s your night, Dory?”
“Leah’s had a bit..”
YFN followed her gaze across the room to the England Captain with a cowboy hat on, singing loudly next to Beth into a microphone.
They chuckled at the image.
“You’re really happy, hm?”
She already knew the answer. Jordan went slightly redder than usual, the alcohol being a small reason for that.
“It’s everything I’ve ever wanted and more. Which reminds me..” she stepped forward and took her hand gently.
YFN let Jordan catch her eye. “I wanted to talk to you both.”
“What’s up, Jords?” Lucy asked.
“Well… Lucy you’ve been a big part of my life since we were kids.. and YFN, you and I have grown this amazing, life-long friendship.. and I’d both really like you to be in my wedding party.” She seemed a little nervous and cleared her throat. “A…and I don’t mean want to upset anyone.. because YFN is one of the newer friends in my life, but we’re just so close and get along so well, and both Leah and I know that we’re only together because of you and what you’ve done, but I love you both so much and…”
Lucy chuckled, catching on. “Spit it out Jords. Just ask her.”
YFN looked from Jordan to Lucy and back, confused for once.
Jordan sighed and squeezed her hand. “YFN.. will you be my maid of honour?”
“Oh… Jesus Dory. I didn’t expect that.” Was her initial response. Followed by silence. And then, she cried.
She turned towards Lucy to hide herself and stopped herself, turning to Jordan instead and leaning into her. Jordan wrapped her arms around her friend tenderly.
“Is that a yes?” Jordan sniffled, YFN able to feel her chest stutter also.
She nodded into her and felt Lucy squeeze her thigh.
Jordan leaned back and the two smiled at each other.
“I’m gonna go out on a limb and say you asked her then?” Leah slurred, her arms going around Jordan’s waist.
“Yeah, I did.”
“Mmn.”
“I take it Keira is yours?” Lucy asked.
Leah nodded. “Asked her yesterday.”
“Is everything okay?” Ridley asked, scanning their faces.
YFN realised she was worried because they were crying. “It’s all good, Riddles.”
Ridley nodded, and then disappeared. Alexia extended her phone towards YFN who gave her a confused look. “It’s Ona… she wants to talk to you.”
“Oh!” YFN took the phone. “Ona! How are you?”
“Hola, YFN.” YFN could hear the smile in her voice. The thing with Ona was that even her voice was attractive.
Because the room was so loud, YFN had to press her free hand over her ear. “Hola, Ona. Everything okay..?”
Alexia and Lucy were looking at her quizzically as it was so unusual for Ona of all people to want to speak to YFN.
“Yes. I took your advice and uh… I think I met someone, but I don’t know what to do.”
ALEXIA POV
Alexia was curious of why Blau of all people was the one Ona wanted to speak to. She cocked her head as she watched Blau talk on the phone. At that time, she noticed that she was empty and cold, almost. She’d been so used to Ridley around her that she noticed her lack of presence immediately.
She looked straight to where she knew she would be, with her team. They were having what seemed to be an intense discussion.
Ridley looked up, spotted her, and looked back down. Alexia knew she was checking to make sure she was safe. She did it often, even before they were together, but even more so now.
“Ale?” Blau said, breaking her from her daze.
She turned to see her extended arm with Alexia’s phone.
“Thank you. Everything okay?”
“With Ona? Everything is more than okay.” She replied with her cute, dimpled smile.
Alexia smiled in return and decided not to push. She was too focused on Ridley who was now making her way back over to the group.
“Home time, I think.”
“Already?!” Leah whined.
“You two stay and have fun!” Blau eased. “Thank you for the invite..”
“You want to go, little one?” Lucy asked.
“I think it’s for the best, Luce. My body is getting tired.”
“Okay, my girl. You two want a lift home?”
The car ride was mostly silent. Blau and Lucy were in the front holding hands and murmuring to each other while Ridley and Alexia were sat in the back in silence. It wasn’t tense, she was just deep in thought and staring out the window. Behind them, Duke and Beckett were following closely.
Alexia let her have a little time to herself, but halfway home, she unclipped her belt and moved across to sit closer to the Australian. Ridley broke from her stupor and turned to her.
Alexia didn’t say anything. She simply raised her arm and let Ridley come to her. She always felt better with her close.
To her surprise, Ridley put her arms around her waist, pulling her close and finding Alexia’s neck with her mouth.
She sucked the skin there into her mouth, her tongue gliding over it before sucking.
Alexia felt it in her clit. She shivered and tried to turn her head so Lucy couldn’t see too much in the rearview mirror.
Ridley marked her neck and Alexia’s first thought should have been how to cover it for the event the next day, but instead all she could think about was getting home and fucking the distraction out of Ridley.
She felt fingertips slide down and under the hem of her shirt, gliding along her skin.
Ridley’s mouth kept exploring her neck with hot, tickly breath and lot of gentle teasing. Her fingers moved down, stroking the skin under the waist of her pants, teasingly and Alexia felt her legs automatically part. She could feel Ridley’s smile against her neck. Her mouth moved up to her ear and Alexia shivered at the feel of her breathing there.
“Tonight, you’re mine.” She murmured huskily in Spanish with just a tinge of Australian accent.
All she could think was that she was always hers.
“Are you two fucking in my car?”
Alexia’s back hit the door of Ridley’s bedroom as soon as it closed. Ridley’s hand came up to grasp her jaw as her tongue slid in her mouth. Alexia moaned out of reaction and pushed back against her, sliding the jacket down her arms and pinning them there. Ridley managed to rip one hand out and grab her throat, squeezing as she pressed her harder against the door.
Alexia dropped her grip on the jacket and instead ripped open her shirt, buttons flying as she wrenched it off of the Australian. Just when her arms were about to be immobilised again, she growled and ripped it off herself, throwing it across the room. Her hands found Alexia’s tits through her shirt and squeezed just rough enough that Alexia had to pull her mouth away just to gasp. In that short break, her shirt was up over her head and gone. Ridley was sliding down her body, hands and mouth trailing, marking, exploring aggressively. She slipped her shoes off and with one hand, she unbuttoned her jeans, sliding them down over her hips. That was the most patient part of her, when she held Alexia’s calves one by one to stop out of her jeans before tossing them away.
She’d assumed her underwear was next, but no. Ridley’s hands gripped the back of Alexia’s thighs where they met her ass, her mouth coming down on her clit over her underwear. They were already stuck to her with the excitement she’d built up in the car, but this was something else. Somehow, Ridley’s tongue was just as effective through the fabric, first sliding left and right to work her way between her folds until the flat of her tongue was directly over her clit.
Her tongue teased, making Alexia’s legs tremble and feel unsure. While she tasted her, her hands slid up over her ass, under her underwear and squeezed as if it was hers. Because it was. Ridley was obsessed with her hips and ass, and Alexia knew it.
The Spaniard swore in Catalan, and just before she lost all of her dominance, she reached down to grab Ridley around the throat and squeeze, dragging her back up to her mouth. She tasted herself in her mouth, her hands fisting that dark, shaggy bob of hers which was getting too long, and turning her head to better taste her.
Ridley’s knee replaced her mouth, pressing onto her cunt expectingly. She couldn’t help but give her what she wanted, rocking hard against it and shivering at the feel of that pressure on her clit. She could feel herself ruining Ridley’s pants but knew they both didn't give a fuck. Regardless, she reached down and unbuttoned her pants, pulling them open. Before she could drag them down, Ridley caught her hands.
“Patience, la Reina.”
Alexia grumbled, shoving her. Ridley stumbled backwards and the footballer followed, shoving her again. She caught up to her at the bed, managing to catch her off guard again before she’d caught herself. Alexia picked her up, throwing her onto the bedside table and knocking off the lamp which shattered on the floor. Her mouth landed on hers again, hands on her face, desperate to touch and taste her. Ridley groaned into her gripping wall with one hand and her blonde hair with the other. Alexia’s hands moved down to Ridley’s tits squeezing and kneading before getting so frustrated at the sports bra that it was up and over her head, thrown somewhere across the room.
Her tongue glided down over her jaw, neck, chest, stopping only to suck her nipple to a peak before moving onto her abs. She grabbed the waist of Ridley’s pants and ripped them off, shoes with it. She came back up, her eyes falling onto her underwear slickly attached to her cunt but Ridley was having none of it.
She found her way to her feet, taking Alexia by the face and kissing her. It was amazing. Personal. And then she was falling backwards onto the bed. She sat up on her elbows just in time to watch Ridley not just take her underwear off, but snap each band at the hips, ripping it from her. She took it and tied it around her own wrist as a prize. Alexia’s mouth dropped open and she felt her eyes darken. She knew she was just about to be fucked. Hard. All goddamn night.
Ridley caught her eye. “Stay.”
She turned and walked away as Alexia lay there panting, watching after her and admiring her physique, scars, and those muscular shoulders of hers.
She returned quickly, and Alexia was focusing so hard on her face, that she didn’t see what she was carrying. Toys landed on the bed next to her. A harness with a dildo, a magic wand, vibrator, hand cuffs, lube, and a bar with cuffs on the ends.
Oh shit, she was in for it.
Her eyes widened and she looked back to Ridley who was watching her reaction, and perfectly in her comfort zone. Holding that eye contact, she removed her rings one by one, and placed them on the night stand.
Alexia swallowed.
Ridley adjusted Alexia on the bed exactly where she wanted her and, holding her eyes the entire time, she knelt down, taking each of her knees and placing them over her shoulders as her mouth again, found her cunt. This time it was hungry and unimpeded. She sunk down and slid her tongue around the entrance to her hole first, darting just the tip in and out a few times before moving back up and taking hold of her clit. She didn’t even work up to it. She teased, hard, as if she knew just how turned on she was.
Alexia didn’t want to come so quickly, because she felt it showed weakness, but she did within a few minutes. She cried out and what’s worse is that Ridley didn’t stop. She continued through it, dragging that shuddering orgasm from her body.
Ridley worked her mouth up over her body, taking her time to mark and suck her nipples into peaks before her mouth landed on hers needily.
One of her hands disappeared and reappeared with the magic wand. Ridley spit on the head and extended it towards Alexia. She took it in her mouth without question, sucking and tonguing the rounded head to lube it up as much as possible. Her body was still shuddering from her orgasm and worsened when it touched her body. Ridley watched her expression as she placed the side of the head on her nipples, circling and taking her time. She worked it down her body, over her sensitive lats and then pressed the body of it against her inner thigh, working right up to her pussy.
She stroked it over her lips first, up and down gathering that excited, slickness of her. Working left and right, she eased it between her folds, pressing it against her hole and holding it there, feeling Alexia’s body react by shuddering and keening. She worked it up towards her swollen bundle on nerves but didn’t touch it. She vibrated every single piece around it, enjoying the frustration building in her girlfriend.
“Please, Ridley… please.”
The Australian hummed happily, and gave her what she wanted, smiling when her body jerked at the feel of the vibrations on her clit.
Ridley lips traced her face: her temple, cheek, jaw, ear, neck, all while she worked the wand on her clit.
Alexia wanted to say she lasted longer than last time, but she didn’t. In fact, she came quicker than the time before, gripping onto Ridley’s hand to hold the pressure of the wand against her clit, vibrating her through a violent orgasm as she cried out and her body shuddered uncontrollably.
Just as she was getting sensitive, the wand disappeared. She gathered her breath, spent and sweaty. Angry almost, her hand dipped into Ridley’s underwear and found her there. Ridley tried to stop her, but to no avail. She was determined. She spread Ridley’s legs with her own, holding them apart as she rubbed her clit, dragging out of her exactly what she’d just done to her.
She was fighting at first, until she wasn’t. Until she was rocking against her hand, swearing into her mouth as she came close.
“Not yet. No. You can come around my fucking fingers.” Alexia snapped, two fingers moving down and sliding into Ridley, stretching her while her palm finished the job. In retaliation, Ridley came crying into her ear, gasping and shuddering. Fuck. Ridley’s orgasm was something else.
Even more frustrated now and trying to take her power back, she grabbed Ridley, their mouths crashing together hot, heavy, and salty as she flipped her onto her back.
She needed more.
They moved desperately and shakily. She grabbed at the harness and worked it up onto Ridley while the Australian took the dildo and lubed it up. Alexia tightened the strap harshly and as soon as she slipped it in, Alexia was sinking down onto it, groaning at the feeling.
“Fuck. Fuck.”
She fucked herself on her girlfriend like she was being paid.
For the first time in her life, she didn't give a fuck about her knee. She didn’t care if she hurt it more, or even if she never played football again. All she cared about was the woman below her, and the feel of that strap sliding in and out of her.
Well it was sliding, until Ridley took hold of her hips and started thrusting up. Then it was fucking up into her. She didn't know if it was more of her riding, or more of her taking what she was given. Regardless, it made her eyes roll to the back of her head as she cried out through it, not even sure what words were coming from her mouth.
Ridley. Fuck. Ridley. Fuck me. I love you. Fuck me. Ridley. Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. I’m yours. Fuck.
Once again, her power was being overtaken by Ridley controlling the situation. She wasn’t mad, but it was frustrating, and so she needed to get some of that out. She grabbed her by the throat as she rode, squeezing the sides and limited the blood flow to her brain. Ridley’s eyelids fluttered and she groaned, her head and eyes rolling back as she became lightheaded. Alexia made her horniness known.
“Fuck yes.” She said through her teeth. “Take it, Lee. Fucking take it until I come.”
She reached down and tightened the harness of the strap as she rode, which put more pressure onto Ridley’s clit. Alexia adjusted the way she rode, leaning backwards more and watching Ridley’s body reacting, knowing she was hitting that good spot.
She was dripping down the strap, covering her girlfriends hips, but it didn’t phase her. Ridley was losing it and she knew that. Her orgasm was glorious. Ridley came first, having been so pent up and gripped hard onto Alexia’s hips as she shuddered. As she came down, Alexia released her grip on her throat and watched the colour come back into her face as a result. The Spaniard chased her orgasm, finding her own creeping up shortly after Ridley’s.
Ridley, however, had other plans. She flipped Alexia when she wasn’t prepared and pulled out, grabbing the pole Alexia had never seen before.
Panting and frustrated over being denied her orgasm, she sat up on her elbows to protest as Ridley grabbed each ankle and cuffed it to the pole.
“What is this?” She argued, wrenching her legs against it. The pole split apart, widening her legs and keeping them there.
She’d fucked up. Ridley grinned and Alexia’s eyes widened. “Shit!”
Ridley grabbed the pole in the middle and flipped it, in turn flipping the footballer with it. Shit. She tried to wriggle away and Ridley caught her hips, lifting them and placing several pillows under her to prop her ass up.
Shit.
She was so exposed.
Ridley’s knelt behind her and bent down, her tongue swiping through her folds. She shivered. Alexia heard her spit into her cunt, and then cried out as two of her fingers pushed into her. She grabbed the closest pillow and dragged it down to have something to grab and bite onto as she took it.
“Aaaargh fuck. Lee.”
Ridley’s free hand slid up her spine to the back of her neck, and then into her hair. She collected her hair into a ponytail, twisting it around her hand and pulling her head back towards her as she pumped her fingers back into her again.
She’d never been in such a vulnerable position, but she felt comfortable. So comfortable that she was unconsciously pushing her ass back in offering. Ridley would never hurt her. She just wanted to give her all of the pleasure in the world.
Her fingers came around in front of her and Alexia sucked just as she'd wanted, her head movements controlled by Ridley’s hand on her ponytail. She moaned onto her fingers.
Then Ridley pushed her legs again further, the pole extending and locking. Her bodyweight pressed down onto her as she buried the cock back into Alexia, pulling her head back at the same time.
They managed to sleep maybe four hours in total. After the roughness, the desperation, the chaotic love expressed as aggressive fucking, they’d showered, cuddled, kissed each other to sleep. Alexia had been worried she’d wake alone, but she didn’t. Ridley was there, fully clothed and holding her, with a warm Chiquito purring against her back.
“Good morning, Lex. Welcome to your day.” She murmured, kissing her forehead.
Alexia groaned, hating mornings. She took a deep breath and pressed her body further into her girlfriend.
It was then that she noticed the clothes. She woke quickly, pulling back.
“Planning with Duke and Becks.”
She looked around sleepily for a clock.
“It’s 9am, love.”
Alexia yawned and laid her head back down onto Ridley, enjoying her warmth and softness.
The Australian held her for a while and let Alexia drift in an out of sleep. Eventually she spoke.
“Blue and Lucy will be here soon, Lex.”
“Mmn?”
“Mmn.” She chuckled in response. “In about ten minutes. Brunch is ready soon. I need you to eat before you go. So I need you to get up, please.”
Alexia sighed and nodded. “I need a shower.”
“I’ll be downstairs.” Ridley went to move and was stopped by Alexia’s tight grip on her shirt. She turned back and was captured by those worried, hazel eyes of hers. As if Alexia had just realised what today was. “I’ll stay with you.”
Ridley stayed while Alexia showered. She was there with her towel when she’d finished, and she’d laid out both her wardrobe for the day and her clothes for their brunch.
Lucy and Blau were there when they came downstairs. They all greeted each other sombrely. Blau did try to cheer the mood, though she only managed to a little. Alexia tried to ignore the startling image of Duke and Beckett along with other military members ready for what seemed to be a battle. The weapons both concealed and otherwise were enough to start a war. Even Chiquito seemed to watch from afar, picking up on the dark mood.
Ridley caught her chin when she noticed, turning it away from them and to her. “Stay here, with me.” She said before kissing her gently.
After brunch, their stylists arrived along with hair and makeup. It was more of a laid-back event, but then again, everyone always expected fashion from Alexia. Ridley stayed close as she got ready, always within eyesight, though getting a little more fidgety and tense. Her eyes kept flickering over to her team.
Just as Alexia was having the finishing touches of her outfit checked, she came over. “I need to go now, Lex.”
Alexia’s blood ran cold. Her hand paused where it was patting Chiquito and she felt her face drop.
“You’re leaving?” Blau asked from next to her.
Ridley nodded.
“Don’t leave without saying bye, Riddles.”
Ridley chuckled and went over to say goodbye to their friends, hugging Blau for what seemed like a long time. She came back over to Alexia and bent down to say her goodbyes to Chiquito first before standing in front of her.
“It’ll be over soon, Lex. Derek’s team will keep you on time. Remember, you’re leaving 30 minutes after us, and in the opposite direction. Same cars, tinted windows. They’ll follow us, not you.”
But Alexia wasn’t worried about that. She felt helpless.
Ridley stepped forward and cupped her face between her hands. “I’ll come to you when it’s done. We do this for a living.”
“I know,” she murmured.
Ridley watched her eyes and the emotions flicker through them. Her thumbs stroked Alexia’s cheeks softly. Only when Alexia felt her body calming a little, did Ridley step forward slowly into her face, their bodies pressed together lightly, and kissed her the complete opposite to how she did the night before. Loving. Gentle. Tender.
And against her lips she whispered. “I love you, Alexia.”
Alexia fidgeted every single second that Ridley was gone. The 30 minutes felt like 3 hours. Eventually, the other team told them it was time.
“It’ll be okay,” Blau comforted. “They’ve done this a thousand times. She’ll be okay.”
But what if she was caught unawares, or in the crossfire?
She kissed Chiquito goodbye and they drove in the opposite direction to the others. The event was in a place where they hosted gala dinners. It was more of a casual event, though, with high tables and a cocktail set up. They were the first to arrive, of course, as Blau had to arrive early and make sure all was set up correctly.
As they walked into the building, Alexia checked her phone. Nothing.
They were introduced to the building’s security team who looked like amateurs compared to the SAS, because they were. They were to stay close to the group, while the SAS team patrolled the building.
Leah and Jordan arrived next with Caitlin and Katie, along with a few Lumos crew. Blau walked them through the event and how it would be run when suddenly, there was a loud banging sound. She jumped. Everybody froze, because everybody in the room knew about the operation.
She caught Blau’s eye and they were startled.
The lights cut out and there was silence for a few seconds, until the gunshots sounded in the darkness.
“GET DOWN!” Lucy shouted. They all dropped and Alexia felt someone pushing her backwards into other people.
When the emergency lighting came on, the gunfire stopped. She realised that it was the security guards ushering them back into against the wall so they could protect them, but there were only five of them.
Two went to check on what happened, and didn’t come back. More shots rang out. She scrambled for her phone and saw multiple missed calls from Ridley. She started calling her again, and Alexia answered. Before she could talk, a group of men burst into the room with rifles. She quickly turned down the volume, clicked facetime and sat it on the ground next to her on loudspeaker.
One security guard stepped forward with his hands up and was shot in the head. Blood sprayed onto Alexia’s face and she jumped, eyes wide and terrified. She dared not to speak to the phone. One of the Lumos workers screamed and covered her ears, squeezing her eyes shut.
Lucy put her body in front of Blau and pressed her against the wall. Blau reached out to take Alexia’s hand and she grabbed it, squeezing tightly.
The men approached and screamed in broken English to the two remaining security guards. They did as they were told and placed their weapons down, sliding them over and lying face down on the ground.
Once on the ground, one of the men looked straight to Alexia and pointed, his eyes lighting up. Then he found Blau and pointed to her, and back to Alexia, speaking in another language to the team.
They were dark skinned and there was no remorse in their eyes. They enjoyed this. She wondered which one was Bashir. The taller man approached Alexia, hand extended to grab her when more shots rang out. Multiple. Screaming.
The lights flickered, and then went off again.
She saw the silhouettes of the men backing off and spinning around, trying to work out what was happening.
And then a bullet sounded so loud that she knew it came from inside the room. What’s worse, is the sound of it piercing through a skull. Then the thud of a body.
Another bullet, and the sound of another body hitting the ground.
As they were all pressed up against each other, Alexia could feel the trembling of the people around them. The Lumos workers hiding behind her. Caitlin and Katie to her left. Lucy and Blau to her right. And Leah with Jordan next to them.
The lights came back on and a figure appeared. The men with guns spun to shoot but they were too slow. The first fell to his knees and Alexia watched wide-eyed as a knife went in and out of his neck almost quicker than she could see. The next two lunged and the figure dropped, slicing at their ankles with one swift movement, leaping up and shooting them both in the head without a second glance.
The taller man and one other were directly in the way of her being able to see this figure as they approached. The shorter man shot and missed. The figure approached closer, moving like an animal, so confident and swiftly. The man swung his fist with a scream and the figure ducked, slicing across his body and in the same move, coming back across to slice across his throat in a quick, methodical move.
The sound of ripping flesh was outdone only by the smell of blood.
The taller man dropped his gun and fell to the floor, his arms up in surrender. Over him, Alexia locked eyes with Ridley. Her eyes were wild, though calmed when seeing her. She was safe. She looked her up and down thoroughly, before assessing the group.
Alexia felt her body start to move towards her, and Ridley's eyes stopped her. “Stay.”
She kicked the guns back towards the security guards. “There are more coming, I need to go. Tie him up and strip him of weapons. Protect this fucking group like your life depends on it. Shoot anyone who isn’t me.”
A creak sounded from above them and Ridley looked up. The panels in the roof started moving and she tracked where they were. When she was sure, she shot up and heard a groan. Blood seeped through the hole in the roof. She waited for movement, and then she was gone again.
The security tied the man awkwardly and took his gun. More shots rang out in the halls. She couldn’t stand what was happening. She went to move and Lucy caught her. She was watching her hard, and shook her head. “Don’t.”
She was still of two minds when Blau whispered. “Please don’t. She’ll never forgive us if we let you leave.”
“We have to run..” Katie stressed.
Blau shook her head. “No, the safest place is here. Riddles would have gotten us out if she could.”
The group stared at the bodies laid in front of them. They flinched with each gunshot or scream they heard.
Minutes felt like hours.
The door smashed open again and they all tensed. Ridley entered at a jog, coming back around to the front of the group.
“Tell us what the fuck is happening!” Katie almost screamed.
“There’s more. They’re coming. But my team are almost here too.”
“W… what happened?” Lucy asked, even her voice trembling.
“Snitch. One of ours.”
Alexia caught Ridley’s eye.
“Not my team,” she clarified, and then her face dropped. “He came for you… to get to me… I’m so sorry.”
Gunshots. Her head snapped up, and her gun raised as she eyed the door.
Watching her like this was eye-opening. She was so methodical. A difference person, almost. And the way she moved… was terrifying. Everything she did was with purpose and clear that she'd done it many, many times before.
But it was nothing she hadn’t expected.
It was the part of Ridley she’d never seen.
“Riddles?” Came Blau’s quiet voice.
Ridley’s face twitched. “I’m sorry, Blue.” She turned her head and her face dropped with her gun when she saw her. “I’m so sor-”
A gunshot sounded out. Everything felt like it was in slow motion.
Ridley’s head snapped back and she collapsed in a sickening thud.
The security guards jumped onto the man they’d failed to tie up properly as they wrenched the gun from his hand.
Blood pooled around Ridley’s head where she lay, unmoving.
And then, Alexia screamed.
#woso#womens football#woso community#woso fanfics#woso imagine#woso soccer#woso x reader#lionesses#engwnt#lucy bronze#woso smut#lucy bronze imagine#lucy bronze x reader#alexia putellas#leah williamson#jordan nobbs#katie mccabe#caitlin foord#aston villa women#arsenal women#fcb femení#fc barcelona#fc barça#barca femeni#barcelona femeni#barca#fc barca#sunsetsandfootballers
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L. KENNEDY, C. REDFIELD, C. OLIVEIRA X READER (SEPARATE)
ೃ⁀➷ sypnosis; christmas hc’s
ೃ⁀➷ warnings; none! pure fluff
ೃ⁀➷ author’s note; ho ho ho merry christmas idc if its nov its christmas time… do ppl drink on christmas? we do so idek? icl this is all like stuff i made up bcos i don’t celebrate christmas like this but wtv we roll #wesołychświąt
C. OLIVEIRA
do not let this man near the kitchen. everything that can go wrong goes WRONG
ask him to take something out the oven, he drops it. ask him to stir something in the bowl he stirs too vigorously and it goes flying all over the counters
he’s a pain. he’s distracting. constantly getting infront of you with the mistletoe, thinking he’s slick by trying to sneak in kisses. constantly sneaking bites of food whenever he thinks you’re not looking (you are, and you smack his hands away with a spoon)
one thing he’s actually good at and enjoys is cookie decorating. he’ll make little gingerbread men of you two and make them so damn detailed. makes one for jill too, though with less care and her face ends up a bit… strange
he’s THAT person which is always ringing everyone, friends and family, wishing them a merry christmas and sends them stupid gifs slavic babcias love so much (if u dont know what i mean then☹️)
LOVES the whole aspect of the christmas tree yet hates putting it together, it pisses him off to no end and half way through ends up calling you over to help him… definitely picks you up so that you can put the star on top
if he gets an ugly christmas sweater you best believe he’s wearing it for the full day, no shame
L. KENNEDY
depends which leon we’re talking about
younger leon puts in more effort, older leon genuinely can’t be fucked to do much
walks around with a trash bag when everyone’s opening presents so there’s no mess on the floor
your guys’ house is literally the christmas function. every year. mostly due to you inviting everyone round and deciding to host it, much to leon’s annoyance but he doesn’t mind THAT much since he loves you!!
definitely the best gift giver. for some damn reason he just knows what everyone wants, genuinely no explanation for it. he just does
he’s such a sweetheart, constantly asking you if you need help with anything in the kitchen or whether you need him to pop to the store for anything
he 100% sang carols when he was younger. just imagine 7 year old leon, hair gelled back, button up shirt, stood infront of the tv singing carols (lets pretend he didn’t have all that trauma okay)… get him to sing again, he might cave once he’s drunk enough with chris
on the topic of chris, something ALWAYS happens when the pair have had a few and aren’t sober any longer. something always gets broken for some reason
one year, they randomly got up and started dancing. leon went flying into the christmas tree and took it down with him.
i hc him as having a rather large sweet tooth, so he’s always down for some cookie decorating! it’s rather sloppy and they end up looking questionable most of the time, but he ends up eating half of them before he’s even fully finished decorating so that’s not much of a problem anyways
C. REDFIELD
santa. need i say more?
nag him constantly to wear a santa outfit or atleast a santa hat. he will cave eventually
DEFINITELY gets a wallet for christmas every damn year without fail, yet doesn’t even use the damn wallets
him in the kitchen helping you out is definitely… something. he doesn’t know how to measure - what the fuck is a cup?
you asked him to help you out and stuff the turkey. he walked out the kitchen.
gets claire shitty gifts on purpose but then gives her her ACTUAL gift. they’re siblings after all, he can’t help it, old habits die hard
hates decorating the outside of the house. it’s his nightmare. all the stupid lights, just no
goes CRAZY on your gift. it’s like a little reward for all the effort you go through every year, and it’s always something you wanted badly and doesn’t fail to put a smile on your face
he’s not necessarily a fan of sweet things, but hot chocolate? that’s a completely different story entirely, you end up having to send him to buy milk since he drank the whole damn carton and there’s none left by the time you get around to actually preparing for dinner
like leon, sits there with a trash bag. he gives such dad vibes i can’t stop imagining it
him and leon ultimate christmas duo after a few drinks. all of a sudden chris is in the biggest christmas spirit ever and can’t get last christmas out his head
best thing is? he’s not even too big on christmas. he actually celebrates it just because of you, what a sweetheart
#ೃ⁀➷. olka’s bs#resident evil#leon kennedy#leon kennedy x reader#leon scott kennedy x reader#chris redfield#chris redfield x reader#carlos oliveira#carlos oliveira x reader#resident evil 4#resident evil 5#resident evil 3
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If it’s okay, not necessarily BuckTommy but -
This season feels SO weird. It’s even weirder because for the first time they had a long time to plan it - they knew they were renewed for a Season 8 early into Season 7. So much so that, for the first time, they let the season end with a cliffhanger. Multiple, even.
And they they dropped all of them in a rushed and unsatisfactory way. If they didn’t want S7’s plots to continue on to 8, they could’ve ended them in S7. Never bring Ortiz or Gerard back. But instead, they went with the oddest choice and created a nice cliffhanger, only to disappoint pretty much everyone.
But for me it’s more than that. It’s also the way the characters don’t always feel like them. You’re telling me Buck never went into a deep dive about queer history or rights when he discovered he’s bi?? that Maddie would make the making men gay comment?? that Chimney wouldn’t talk to Hen about the possible second pregnancy?? I could go on and on.
And the dynamics also feel… broken. We barely have friendship moments, at all. Buddie this season feels weird, like Eddie doesn’t really want to be bothered by Buck. Hen and Chim are barely communicating. The firefam doesn’t have moments outside of emergencies (save that montage of them asking Bobby for help).
It feels like the writers have stopped knowing how to write these characters and their dynamics. And for me the found family that I fell in love with at first watch feels gone, you know?
i’ve been saying this since s6!
like aren’t they tried of keep writing buck the same all the time??? he doesn’t get promoted on his job that he’s fucking good at it, they had a kind of story about it when buck wanted to be captain in s6 and then bridge fall happened and buck was a fucking powerhouse in it and i thought they finally gonna show buck more that just a young goofy firefighter that thinks on his feet, show them he’s a leader but then they dropped it.
he doesn’t get into lasting relationship and is always chasing one and apparently now he’s gonna forget his character’s growth and gonna be right back in s1. it’s like buck’s always gonna be the boyish bratt they made in s1 when he was 25/6 not a 33yo man!
eddie can’t fucking move on for 6/7 years and tries constantly to make a mom out of everything woman he dates but now a confession and a random priest apparently healed him like he was possessed not fucking mentally traumatized!
madney are most of the times are dealing with dough that comes out like random jump scares. maddie had 2 stories last season both was about her trauma with him. yes you can’t heal from something like that for a long time or possibly never but for god’s sake that woman raised his brother as his own child when she was still a child herself and what did 911 do with this part of her? NOTHING
and you don’t need me talk about hemren’s endless suffering
and where is athena’s children???
it’s been a mess since s6 but now it’s wors cuz tim starts writing 5 minutes before they start shooting. i said it 100 times the only thing good about s7 was buck’s bi arc. they make a big deal out of problems and solve them in most childish ways in the same episode!
i know it’s basically a soap opera but ffs it’s not a fantasy. they pulled dead wife no.2 cuz it’s a soap but in what word a child can land a plane?
honestly after i reed that tim rewatched the whole thing before writing for bi buck i was sure the show gonna back to its root where chim and hen are besties and hen and athena spend time together etc etc, but apparently all he got from that is abby had a boyfriend named tommy
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I came from your post saying it was a really good episode, and that you loved it. It went against the grain and I feel the same way!
Tommy had all this talk of wanting a family, that the 118 could be his family but he still broke up with Buck because of what seems like this own insecurities. He can’t believe that Buck really wants him to move in, it’s like a shock to the system. When Buck confesses in 7x04 Tommy is surprised, and in 8x06 assumes Buck is going to be the one to break up.
To me, it comes across like he’s going through his own insecurities of “does Buck really love him?” Maybe it’s biphobia, since he’s ‘buck’s first’, or maybe he’s just not as strong as he presents himself to us. I knew Abby would be connecting them and I thought it was great, honestly. Buck was the rebound, don’t get me started Abby’s lowkey creepy behaviour too before they got serious, and as it comes he’s now dating her ex-fiancé.
The amount of teasing they did before this episode makes me hope they fix it. That they resolve it. The interviews made it seem like a bump in the road and not *The End*. I hope they find a way to keep him around even if they’re not together. Lou is an amazing actor and I relate to Tommy so so so much!
However aside I do think the writing of this episode wasn’t particularly good, it felt rushed and had me devastated at the end. I hope he’s not gone, and while I know they probably won’t be end game I can keep dreaming.
I love your positivity and I love your posts I can’t wait to hear more of your opinions!
Thankyou so much! You’re pretty much on the same train of though I am here, as well!
I really, really relate to Tommy and again while I’m projecting I saw what you saw with the insecurities. I also am starting to get the sneaking suspicion that Tommy panicked, cut and ran before he got in too deep because he’s done this before. Abby (and ugh I won’t start on her 😑) is the only past relationship of his that we have confirmed, so there’s potential there for it to be that!
And oh man, Tommy saying he’s not the last guy, the endgame, the forever partner got me so hard in the fucking feels. Because that is 100% why I relate to him. I’m that guy. I’m the guy that gets a fun however long until we go our separate ways and they find their forever human. But I’m still alone. And I’ve personally screwed up several potentially good relationships because of the trauma I have around that- so why can’t Tommy? That’s where my mind goes, and again there’s so many ideas to be had from that as a storyline too.
I really, really don’t think this is the last we will see of Tommy or Lou. Fandom is upset, but the amount of people from the general audience I see commenting criticism on FB and Insta is making me super hopeful (because the GA loved Tommy and that’s how we got him for more eps in the first place!) I was nearly cry laughing at the amount of commenters saying their boomer parents flipped their shit about it! 😂😂😂
My crystal ball is too cloudy to see into the future for realsies, but I rediscovered my love of shouting into the tumblr void thanks to this show, so I’ll stick around and share my ridiculous ideas and try to make people smile for a long while yet. And please feel free to keep sending me your takes too, because yours are really awesome as well. This fandom is pretty darn good, all things considered!🖤🖤🖤
#911 abc#lou ferrigno jr#tommy kinard#evan buckley#bucktommy#911 spoilers#tevan#ask catgirl#catgirlthoughts
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Hey, just wondering if you could give us some insight into how the sleepy kitten cafe staff met Alan/got close to him/what they think of him. Also curious to see what all the bats think about cardinal. Did they ever meet in costume?
P.S: Keep up the good work!!
Of course!! I touched a little bit in "Jerry the Raccoon" but that was mostly Tim & Zeek (and it was not my best chapter- but I refuse to edit it for my own sanity)
Also so far? No. Cardinal manages to maintain a distance 24/7 with bats (almost as if hes tracking them during patrol- wild right??) But overall
Bruce is tearing his hair out, but admits they are useful and more effort than they're worth.
Babs adores them, and is on a mission to find them out and take them under her wing
Dick finds Bruce plight funny- but is kinda unnerved how similar Cardinal is to a talon in some ways. (also just creepy in general)
Jason "Game recognizes game" but wishes Cardinal would stop running so he could ask him more questions
Cass never gets close. But not bothered by them.
Steph thinks Cardinal is badass but keeps her distance, doesnt trust the vibes
Damien acts like he doesn't care about Cardinal (He so does, hes obsessed- lowkey fanboy behavior)
Alfred thinks its nice Bruce has someone else willing to deal with Gotham, who ISN'T under his nagging control. Theres some respect there.
NOW Sleepy Kitten fam backstory (as of rn, subject to change as lore provides)
Well Alan Draper (Originally Alvin) was a normal civillian persona Tim had- but in order to MAKE a persona, people need to know you. Otherwise it takes a quick asking around to realize you aren't who you say you are.
So when Tim was Fifteen or so Alan "moved to Gotham" from Chicago and started taking classes at Gotham University. He started showing up at the cafe out of pure convinence before Obi and Gwen worked there (officially)
Obi's dad had a run in with a rouge, got injured, and couldn't work both shifts. So they turned to part time student and began running the store. They'd gotten used to Alan hanging around and they talked on ocassion but mostly enjoyed silence when the other was working. Slowly but surely Tim grew to love being Alan- one of the few times he could be stress free anymore and yet not be so alone. And Obi dealing with the stress of taking over family buisness had one customer whose ever presence was comforting.
A few months pass and they consider each other pretty close friends to the point Alan had a spare key to the cafe in case of emergencies. Soon after some of the other staff quit and Obi opened applications- Gwen showed up, nervous as hell having never worked a day in her life and already applying to like ten other positions.
But Obi was desperate and soon enough Gwen was at the cafe just about every hour of the day and night. It got to the point where she would hang out even after her shift.
Then by pure forced proximity, Alan grew to love her company just as much as Obi- though in a way that forced him out of his shell just a bit.
It was clockwork of Alan, Gwen, and Obi all at the Sleepy Kitten on random day hours chatting away while working.
Events of the chapter transpire, with Alan showing up with this guy who 100% belongs in a gang, but Obi takes "minding their own buisness" HARD and trusts both Alan and Gwens opinions (Gwen who just saw sad guy and forced to help)
Now Obi has basically permenantly taken over the cafe, but still takes some art school classes on the side with some of the profits that don't go back into the cafe.
Gwen and Zeek have an apartment together in the far narrows since Gwen was desperate to move out, and Zeek was company and free security, who also needed a place. Apartment is just a block or so from the cafe too
Alan lives outside downtown but commutes often, works odd hours but whenever he is free, will set up in the cafe and enjoy the peace for a bit with his friends.
Long story short- they were coworker friends, except Alan refused to take a job literally ever.
#sunny asks#IM SO SORRY#I LEFT YOU IN DRAFTS#I DIDNT REALIZE#ALDHIDG#IDK HOW OLD THIS IS#AHHH#the drakes spoiled brat#tim drake#trash tim au#batfamily#ty for the ask!!#SOB#gwen parkins#zeek zolof#obsidian fowler#the sleepy kitten cafe#lore dump#(for now)#(subject to change still)#sunny rambles#batfam#dc cardinal
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Kinda sorta sleeping beauty AU
When Eddie tries to ask around the town for more details no one knows much more abt the long abandoned keep, only tht the dagger hasn't rusted or been removed & tht getting into the keep has proven impossible. Eddie thinks his search for more details is useless till the heir of the Wheeler family pulls him aside following dinner. She says tht she might know more details than others, and so Eddie let's her talk after they've hidden away in a room where they won't b disturbed.
A!Nancy Wheeler has an ancestor, Nancine Wheeler, who had worked closely w the lord of the keep. Nancine had been clever & quick w learning so she had been appointed as an aid to the lord. Her ancestor had kept a journal & Nancy had found it gathering dust in a dark corner of their small library.
She was able to learn tht the lord & lady had one heir, a son & omega, born beautiful in a way tht was talked abt amongst the nobles of all the land. The lady soon faded after giving birth, & the lord buried his wife while carrying his infant son in his arms. The lord trusted Nancine to oversee things as he grieved for a customary 4 months but the lord was keeping a secret she was never privy to.
Every full moon while the town slept the lord would take a seldom used row boat out to the middle of the lake. After 10 years every full moon the heir was kept within his rooms till sunrise. Till one month the lord fell ill, he was unable to go to the lake, he was unable to give the order tht his son b kept to his rooms, & so for the first time the heirs rooms were left unguarded during a full moon. Nancine wrote tht the heir was not in his rooms the next morning & tht his handmaid was missing too & when a frantic search was sent out he wasn't found till nearly dusk, standing at the lake's edge staring out to the empty water. The handmaid was never found, not even a body.
When Nancy concludes her tale there Eddie asks to know more, but Nancy tells him tht is all her ancestor wrote tht isnt already known by the town. Eddie asks for the name of the nobles, Nancy shows him the journal she'd found, to reveal tht places where the names of the family should b r as blank as if nothing had ever been written there. He wonders out loud what could've been happening at the island in the middle of the lake, but Nancy goes pale before gripping his shoulders. She explained there wasn't an island in the lake in the whole of the journals contents, not till Nancy reached the final page & found a question scribbled into the margins, asking why the island had appeared through the heavy fog of mid summer.
That night as he drifted to sleep Eddie wondered abt the new facts Nancy had told him, abt Robin who was clearly not human at least not anymore, & abt the island tht apparently hadn't existed till 100 years ago.
Again he dreams, he is not at the water's edge, he's in the row boat gliding across the water without him needing to row, when the boat hits the shore of the island Eddie stares into the dark shadows of the clustered trees. He stares as fog rolls from the trees as if the island itself is producing such a phenomenon. Then Eddie sees a bright color move among the branches, it is a bird. A bright orange breast flashes as the bird flies further into the trees. He hears it sing & he takes a breath before he is stepping out of the boat onto the island. Eddie enters the treeline, and immediately there is a shadow moving between the trees making a noise he's never heard all his life. When the shadow is charging at him after Eddie continues to try to follow the bird he spins to face it determined to live & learn what is going on. He feels a now familiar weight & doesn't look at his hand as he swings the silver dagger at the same time as the creature reached its claws back to slash him. Eddie wakes up.
He spends the entirety of the next day sitting upon a large boulder tht allowed him a view of the island. An island Eddie is realizing tht has never been without a thick fog shrouding it since he arrived. Even as it is a perfectly sunny day in the midst of summer.
Children of the town find him since he is sitting near where they like to swim after completing all of their chores. Among them is the middle child of the Wheelers, Michael. When Eddie asks them abt the island they all say no one goes there not even fishing boats, bc ppl who tried to go to the island to find the treasures always came back not able to remember tht they'd left at all.
Tht night Eddie finds himself in another dream. The beast of the trees is dead behind him as he treks away from the shore, he thinks he can see the beginning of a maze of hedges ahead of him but then he hears the echoes of a voice singing. The breeze shifts & he smells apples. His chest begins to radiat warmth to the rest of his body, he hadn't noticed how cold he was, as he followed the scent through the maze, somehow knowing it'd lead him to the voice. Then he sees it, a clearing at the center of the hedges bathed in moonlight. Sitting upon a stone bed is a man humming a song, even in the blue tones of a full moon Eddie can tell his skin is golden as sunlight, & the breeze brings him another whiff of scent like baked apples stuffed w walnuts & honey. He steps into the clearing, and the man looks up at him. Eddie wakes up w visions of hazel eyes twinkling like stars live in them, & the scent of apple lingering in his nose.
That day he wanders the town, wanders till day turns to dusk & as the town begins settling for the night he is walking to the doors of the keep. He is grasping the silver dagger in his hand, & pulling it out as if the door was merely butter. The sun is fading & Eddie only has a vague idea of what it is he's abt to try to do.
Eddie walks along the shore. The full moonhis only source of light. He always makes sure he will b able to get back to town, but he had to dismiss the boats of the fishermen as they were all too big. Then he hears the clunk of wood floating against stone. Eddie finds a familiar row boat floating in the shallows tied to a branch hanging from above. As he approaches to peer inside the boat perhaps to find the oars, a voice suddenly speaks somewhere above him, startling him into falling into the boat. When he turns Robin stands on the branch above w the rope in her hand.
"Will you be the one to wake him?"
[Part 2 of 3]
‼️‼️‼️
***links to come later because tumblr is acting up and won’t let me add hyperlinks right now***
(link to part one)
(link to part three when it’s posted)
#slick sunday#steddie#steddie omegaverse#omega steve harrington#alpha eddie munson#steve x eddie#a/b/o#omegaverse#my asks
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Chloe's Second Chance AU
(ik I'm so creative with names)
A 24-year-old Chloe returns to her 13-year-old body a few days before the events of the show
She is a way more mature Chloe who learned from her mistakes after going to therapy (and after being exiled to New York and becoming independent from Audrey)
She considers New York her true home cuz she never felt truly loved in Paris
After getting better, she was able to be friends with Adrien again, but their relationship was never the same
She had many part-time jobs to be able to survive without Audrey's help
WHEN SHE RETURNS
She freaks out the first few hours and desperately searches for a way to come back home, but after calming down a bit, she sees this as an opportunity to apologize, she still looks for a way to come back tho
She want to go back cuz she doesn't want to go through everything with her shitty family again (being humiliated by Audrey, being traded by the parent who thought he loved her for her half-sister who doesn't even share blood with him, being exiled by him...)
Chloé plans to apologize to everyone, but the priority is Marinette (because she was the one she treated the worst) and she decides it with a apology letter. After finishing the letter she receives a message from Adrien
ADRIEN
He thanks Chloé for persuading his father and says if he goes to school, it will be thanks to her. Chloé sends him a message that she is 100% sure that he will succeed. But she also tells him he doesn't need to be with her all the time anymore and suggest to pretend they don't know each other, feeling guilty about his rough start at school bc he was friend with her.
Adrien is confused and thinks Chloé doesn't want to be friends anymore, despite all the messages, Chloe doesn't answer him anymore. Adrien despairs wondering what happened and has deja vu, feeling abandoned again (mommy issues) his determination to go to school becomes 10 times more intense to find out what happened with Chloe
Adrien still helps Fu, but he's more stubborn this time and pushes Nathalie's hand away, which distracts Gorilla so that he can actually go on the first day this time
He hugs Chloé, causing a scene. When asked if they are a couple, Chloé firmly says they are just friends
She said it firmly and without hesitation. Adrien feels a lump in his throat, but he wonders why, obviously they are friends and always have been so why does it feel so painful?
That's because he recently felt for the first time that he could actually lose Chloe, that friend who was there since he was practically born. Added to the fact that he had recently lost another important person (Emilie) makes him become a little possessive of Chloe
...
Cloe: Are you sure? I still feel that it will be difficult for you to get along with the others if they know that you are my friend...
Adrien: As I said I don't need a friend who doesn't like you
....
Marinette: Are you friends with Chloe?
Adrien noticed Marinette's obvious dislike towards her friend, he frowns
A: You know what? Nevermind
He turns around, angry, knowing that Marinette is one of those people he won't become friends with. And Marinette just rolls her eyes
ALYA
Chloé avoids Marinette and is surprised when Alya greets her enthusiastically. Chloé freaks out at the sudden greeting, wondering why Alya is sitting next to her then she realizes the consequences of not fighting for the seat and tries to pair Alya and Marinette, but Alya is more interested in talking about superheroes.
Chloé, a secret superhero fan (influenced by Adrien when he showed her the magical girls in the anime, but since it wasn't appropriate for a daughter of a politician, she repressed that taste, but after being exiled she didn't have to hide it anymore), bonds with Alya over their shared interest.
Chloé feels guilty for taking Marinette's precious friend but decides to keep Alya as her seatmate since Alya is new she doesn't know about all the bad things she did and it's refreshing to have someone who doesn't avoid her or isn't afraid of her
Since Chloe never put the gum, Mari doesn't fall in love with Adrien, but she still doesn't like Adrien cuz he's Chloe's friend
Chloé realizes too late the consequences of not putting the gum (Adrien from the future told her) Chloé has no idea how to fix it and doesn't want to put the gum in again either, but she makes herself believe that maybe it's for the best, it doesn't make their first meeting so unpleasant and surely in the future there will be more opportunities for Mari to fall in love with Adrien! (Adrien told her many of their romantic events)
Obviously mari never fell in love with Adrien
MARINETTE
Marinette receives a letter from Chloé before the first day of school, that letter doesn't let her sleep causing her anxiety.
On the first day, Chloé looks at Marinette sitting in her seat, deliberately avoiding her and passing her by without even looking at her (Mari stares at her expecting her to tease her, but is surprised when she ignores her and wonders if the letter was real, shakes her head dismissing it and "it's probably a trap")
Umbrella scene
Marinette confronts Chloé about the letter, saying what the hell does this mean
Chloé blushes saying that it's an apology letter, but Mari doesn't believe her at all
Chloé assures her that it's not true and begins to explain
C: The reason why I've bothered you so much even more than the others is because I was jealous of you
M: Jealous? But you're Chloe Bourgeois! The girl who has everything!
C: Not everything-she said with a sad smile- you have friends who love and support you and a wonderful family that believes in you. My mom abandoned me when I was 5 and my dad sees me as nothing more than a political tool
Marinette stares at her not knowing what to say
C: I know that's no excuse for everything I put you through and I understand if you don't want to forgive me but you deserve an apology and an explanation. I'm truly sorry Marinette
M: I-I don't know if I can forgive you, I have to think about it
C: Fair, although could you accept my umbrella? My limo is right in front so I won't get wet
Marinette cautiously accepts the umbrella and a clap of thunder sounds at that moment making her heart beat faster causing the umbrella to close suddenly, Chloé laughs before she can help it and apologizes
C: I'm sorry I didn't mean to make fun of you! It was just something very sudden and-
M: Haha it's okay, I admit that it was kind of funny
Cloe smiles at her in relief
C: See you tomorrow Dupain Cheng -she says before getting into the limo-
M: A-aha s-see you, why am I stuttering?
AUDREY
Audrey comes back way more earlier bc of Chloe's new behavior (maybe André asked her for help, but I honestly don't think Audrey will listen to him, although that might just get her interest a little)
So Audrey becomes Style Queen earlier and Marinette is sent by the lucky charm to Master Fu (maybe this happens before Tikki gets sick so it would be the first time she meets the guardian)
Fu doesn't let Marinette choose the holder this time because he doesn't know her as well as in the series, he suddenly remembers when Chloe helped him on the first day of school and tells Marinette that he will choose the new holder of the bee himself
Chloé is very confused as to why the miraculous was found somewhere else, but she doesn't think much about it in order to help LB and CN quickly
Once they win, QB tries to LB returns the Miraculous to LB but LB panics saying not to reveal her identity
QB is very confused and LB explains to her that she has been chosen
QB asks her confused if she doesn't know her identity and LB tells her no. She also asks if this is permanent or temporary. (I don't know if LB knows that, either way, if it's just temporary the Guardian will contact her to return it)
QB agrees and leaves and yes it was temporary (I still don't know how she would return it, maybe Fu disguises himself?)
But Pollen is very sad and tries to convince Fu to make her a permanent hero, flattering her for everything
Pollen: she is the best Queen Bee I have seen, she is very strong, she is very mature for her age, she is very intelligent and cunning, she knows how to do everything (because of her jobs in her past life) (Basically she is Tikki 2.0)
Pollen does this every time a new Akuma appears
Someone gets Akumatized
Pollen: Do you know who could help LB and CN to resolve this quickly? Queen Bee~
Fu is a little tired, but I find it somewhat endearing and also understands that kwamis want to go out more
Relations Situation
Chloe likes LB
Marinette likes Chloe (she's in denial but Tikki knows better)
Adrien likes Chloe
Adrien and Marinette hate each other
LB only sees QB as a good friend
Sabrina hates Alya (explained in kofi)
Chloe sees Adrien as a friend/sibling
Chloe doesn't know LB or CN identities
If you want to know more all the lore is available in my kofi! (I'll probably post there new AU ideas and art in the future so stay tuned ^^)
Cooking a new AU rn
#Chloe's second chance au#chloe bourgeois#chloenette#chlodrien#chlobug#I had to summarize 13 Word pages in this 💀💀#So there are a lot of details that I left out
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Reverse trope
where instead of the Bats forgetting that they’re adopted (something actual adoptees do on occasion and is hilarious) they forget that some of them *cough Damian cough* aren’t
_______
Jason in the heat of a probably ridiculous argument: Yeah well YOU’RE adopted!
Tim just as invested in said argument: So are YOU! We all are!
Damian who had previously been quietly watching this unfold while he drank his tea: Actually I’m not
Tim and Jason who didn’t realize he was there but are already DoneTM: …… Damian continuing to sip his tea entirely unbothered: :)
Damian: Because I’m not an orphan-
Jason: ok, yoU KNOW WHAT-
____
or like in their group texts (that we know they have thanks to Nightwing (2016) #79)
*Steph changed the group chat name to “Bruce Wayne’s Personal Orpanage”*
Jason: Really?
Steph: ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
Steph: It’s the truth Damian: Both my parents are very much alive
Steph: Shhh you don’t count
Cass: Mine too Duke: Technically so are mine
Barbara: I still have a dad so there’s that
Steph: YOU GUYS ARE RUINING THE JOKE
Tim: Stephanie aren’t BOTH of your parents alive???
Steph: KNOW WHAT? FINE
*Steph changed the group chat name to “The Technicality Police”*
Tim: well that’s more accurate at least
Steph: :)
_____
Damian in his 10th argument with Tim of the day: That’s- this is-
Tim in full Antagonizing Big Brother mode: I’m listening
Damian -a Gen Z and best friend to Jon Kent- extremely frustrated: This is such Motherless behavior!
Tim taken aback: [voice cracking] W-what-?
Damian who didn’t mean to say that but doubling down anyway because his bloodline doesn’t believe in admitting mistakes: THIS! This is such Motherless behavior!
The rest of the family who is also motherless: :O
Cass whose been spending way too much time with Meme Queen Stephanie Brown and not involved in the argument but finding it entertaining regardless: [nodding along seriously] Facts
Tim: [visibly betrayed] CASS WHAT-
A video copy of the interaction gets sent out anonymously to the entire family. Barbara is the prime suspect but there is no proof as of yet (and they will never find any)
Steph, Cass, and Duke continue to respond “Motherless behavior” everytime one of the bats does something they deem questionable/insane. It is said often
It only stops when one night in the middle of patrol. Batman is in full Dark Knight mode (possibly in the middle of threatening someone) and descends from the ceiling into the middle of a warehouse drug deal, dark cape billowing out behind him-
and Steph just automatically whispers “Motherless behavior” forgetting her com was still very much on
She immediately realizes what she said and frantically apologizes but it’s too late.
Bruce just- Blue Screens. Completely stunned into silence
Dick -who was unfortunate enough to be the one teamed up with Batman tonight- is fighting for his life to choke back his laughter
Jason doesn’t even try to stop his and has collapsed to his knees from lack of air from how hard he’s laughing. Cass try’s half heartedly patting his back to help to no avail
The criminals are terrified into surrender from The Red Hood just laughing hysterically at seemingly nothing while Batman just Stands There
Damian ends up being the only one still functioning enough to continue arresting everyone, though he is privately amused and strangely proud
Tim and Barbara have saved both the com recordings and cowl footage to at least three different servers and sent it to absolutely everyone before Batman even recovers
Duke finds out second hand the next morning and is furious he missed the chance to see it in person. He declares he is moving to the nightshift so it doesn’t happen again. (He is all talk and goes to bed by 9 pm)
Bruce bans the phrase for life and promises swift and server punishment to anyone who dares to use it again
#Like it’d be so funny#Imagine them on mothers day#Damian at unnecessary volumes: I AM LEAVING TO GO TO VISIT MY MOTHER NOW#Damian: WHERE SHE LIVES.#His brothers on their way to the cemetery or smth: ._.#Damian still going regardless: BECAUSE SHE IS ALIVE#I just know Damian “Certified Mama’s Boy” Wayne would be such a menace about it#And Duke Babs Steph and Cass would so help fan the flames#batfam#dc comics#fanfiction#headcanon#chat fic#Can you tell I read them often#And yes adoptees forget they’re adopted#I have a friend who has on multiple occasions started to tell me about something that “ran in the family”/something in her family history#Before she’ll remember she’s not actually blood related#someone has probably already done this#But I still thinks it’s very funny#No I don’t think Jon would say motherless behavior to someone#But I do think he’d know the phrase and teach Damian#I just imagine he educates him on all the Gen Z lingo don’t ask why#crack post#100% a joke dont take it seriously
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man, ace attorney really is just "people with abandonment issues" central, huh?
#ace attorney#you got:#phoenix wright#like no way hes not terrifyied of losing people#after one “chose death”#and Mia dying and the shitfest of Dahlia & Iris and t#Miles edgeworth#cuz.... you know..... heh#fransizka von karma#<- def does not want to be 'left behind' in any sense#Trucy Wright#100%#apollo justice#durke wHY DID U DO THAT TO HIM#athena cykes#simon... u were her next closest family member.... u dummy#klavier gavin#you know why#and so on
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This is interesting! Particularly because it's a departure from the usual conclusions that hardcore Pekoyama fans usually make from this evidence. Which is...
Peko's biological parents are the Pekoyama clan
The typical interpretation goes something like this:
The Pekoyama clan is a band of renowned swordfighters. For whatever reason, they get in massive debt to the Kuzuryuu clan. The Kuzuryuu clan force them to repay these debts by taking their young heir, and training her to be a bodyguard for their own heir when he is born. We know the rest of the story.
The evidence for this is as follows (though keep in mind, I did not consider your interpretation when I was formulating this, so the evidence seemed more self-evident originally):
Pekoyama's name in the Japanese is spelt 辺古山 ペコ. Her family name, (辺古山) is spelt normally, in kanji. However, her first name is spelt in katakana, which as far as I can tell is the only of the three Japanese scripts not used to write Japanese names. Also it's literally just the first two phonetic sounds of her surname. Which gives the impression that her surname is real, and her first name is something carelessly made up on the fly because you have to call her something.
The fact that she has a family heirloom. Why would the Kuzuryuu clan know the family of an orphaned baby? As far as I know, people in Japan don't usually attach their family name when they're orphaning a child.
...Yeah, it was primarily based on the premise that out of the two contradictory pieces of information we get about Pekoyama's parents, the one at the end of Chapter 2 (that she was abandoned by them from birth) is the correct one.
Of course... there are still issues with this interpretation. Primarily, that Island Mode dialogue where she says she has memories of her parents being alive. The heirloom is a bit iffy, too. (Perhaps it's something the Kuzuryuu clan also took along with Pekoyama?)
The only excuse I can come up for the parents thing is that it is Pekoyama deliberately lying to make her childhood sound more normal. Because the closer she gets to telling the truth, the more questions Hinata will have, and she doesn't want that. That's not the point she's trying to convey anyways, so she goes with a simple lie to smooth it over so she can talk about her memories
There are issues with your interpretation too, namely that the Kuzuryuu clan risks giving Pekoyama an alternative motive through giving her actual parents, i.e. humanising her and possibly making her consider if there's other ways she can live. As we both know, Pekoyama's Island Mode ending implies that she is only so dedicated to her tool mindset because it's the only way she knows how to live.
Whilst I probably will come around to yours more as I let it sink into my brain, I'm going to be honest, I am still quite attached to the 'Pekoyama was stolen from the Pekoyama clan' interpretation, because I've spent a lot of time thinking about it, and because those hardcore Pekoyama fans have also written about it.
One of my absolute favourite implementations of it is at the end of thewildwilds' already incredible fic [absolute zero.] where it's mentioned that upon taking baby Pekoyama, her parents cursed the Kuzuryuu clan by swearing that their child would ultimately cause the destruction of the clan. That's SO DELICIOUS
As you know, I am very much a fic writer. So much so that my opinion on ships is often determined by easy/fun they are to write. And there is a lot of potential things to explore in this interpretation that I've barely ever seen anyone cover beyond 100 word drabbles.
For example... this means that Pekoyama is the only former RoD who could still have their parents alive. So... how would she cope with that? (I have some answers to that, but they're not precise, and this is getting long enough already.) NO ONE HAS EXPLORED HOW SHE'D INTERACT WITH HER BIO PARENTS AT ALL SOB. I may have to get over my natural reluctance to make OCs for this...
(This still could be explored under your interpretation, it's just that it's harder to pinpoint who her bio parents are, and those parents are less defined.)
In conclusion: what the hell even was this (MY POST NOT YOURS). There are several points I almost certainly forgot. Pekoytama.
Random tidbits about the Pekoyama Dojo
Peko was adopted by the Pekoyama Dojo
Peko reminiscence about her parents taking her to an old amusement park.
Because Peko was abandoned as a baby by her birth parents, it can be deduced all her memories regarding her parents is with her adoptive parents.
The only time she feels like smiling outside her Free Time Event, is when she is at an amusement park.
Because Peko was given the Pekoyama's family heirloom, and the obvious fact she bares the family name, you can infer that Peko's adoptive parents was from the Pekoyama Dojo on the Kuzuryus behalf.
Peko states that her dojo is not exactly a Kendo dojo. The fact that their family heirloom bears the symbol of the Kuzuryu clan mascot, the Pekoyamas were mostly likely a vassel family who served the Kuzuryus (I think the Japanese term is Kashin but don't quote me on that)
Peko's experiences at the Dojo
Just because it would be too much to screenshot, it's strongly implied that everything she did was a form of training. Peko can't take an activity at face value and see everything as a form of training. Examples include: Splitting watermelons, dropping coconuts, watching movies, going into haunted houses.
You could make the argument, because Peko was a 'tool', this was the justification to allow Peko to do normal activities.
Overall, Peko recalls only nice things about the dojo
As always, shout out to Peko's pet finch that probably hated her
Not canon in the slightest, but a moment from the manga
Mentions of Peko's childhood that may or may not be related to the dojo
#also THE FINCH WHO HATES HER BAHAHA. i referenced that in a talentswap fic (where the finch actually likes her)#also kuzuryuu has a dog which is also implied to hate peko#there's a fic by sunbrights about it. called [fear aggression] i think#danganronpa#sdr2#peko pekoyama#character essay#qualityposting#i think#reblog#cosmic the yapper#long post
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Both my parents actually suffer from HORRID emotional dysregulation and are prone to snapping and going into rages. My sister is the same way tbh. I am now realizing this is why they are constantly baffled by the question of whether or not I am mad at them.
I don't have external meltdowns.
I could. I don't let it happen.
I keep my rage on the inside and stay pretty quiet about it. It's just as strong as theirs [physically shaking nose bleed from high blood pressure kind of bad], but like as a kid I saw how terrifying it was to be around [dad breaking dishes, mom putting our lawn chairs into walls] and I just internalized that I wasn't going to wear that anger on the outside.
So my mother genuinely cannot tell if I am just being quiet or if I am silently hearing the dial-up noises of pure rage. This has lead her to both making strong and confident statements like "You are a pacifist who would never hurt a fly U.U" but also acting like I am secretly dangerous maybe... It's because she has never seen me snap.
She knows what her temper is like [throwing chairs through walls], she knows what my father's temper is like [pick up child and toss out door], and she can tell I am being tested, but she doesn't know what happens when I snap or where that breaking point is.
Her -perhaps unhinged- solution to this, my whole life, has been to do things that should obviously enrage me or shut me down completely, like ignoring important boundaries, repeatedly, punishing me for expressing emotions or needs at all, etc... And then to constantly ask me if I am angry with her when I get too quiet [right after near directly telling me to shut up].
It has occurred to me now, they have never once seen me lose my temper, so they literally just can't tell if I am angry at them. My sister is easy, my mother fights and screams with my sister constantly, my mother understands this. My mother doesn't have any grasp of feelings or boundaries that are not screamed at her [apparently, and I fear my sister is the same way]. Her and my sister are close despite constant fucking fighting because they understand each other.
They are trying to get me to engage the same way and it is not working. I realize now that this has been hard for them.
I was so successfully taught to suppress my emotions, by being punished for any outburst, that rage quiet looks the same as any other kind of quiet from the outside. To them anyway.
I did tell her. For the record. I used my words. I did tell her very calmly that my response to rage, in order to avoid doing the things that terrified me as a child, was to simply leave [the autistic urge to GTFO]. When a situation or person causes too much of the dial-up rage noise, I simply extract myself from that situation, up to and including never speaking to a person again. I explained this calmly. I explained it calmly 100 times and I explained that I explain myself calmly as my rage response 1-5 [also pretty much every other negative emotion tbh], and I told her that what came next was me simply opting out and fucking off. I told her this. I couldn't understand why she never took me seriously, or why she never fucking understood.
I couldn't understand what made her like this.
But it's the same problem I have with everyone else multiplied by a factor of 10.
If I am explaining myself calmly, they can't understand that it's actually serious or that I am actually upset. ESPECIALLY because they read me as "female" and women "aren't that rational" so if I am not screaming and crying about something, which I never do, people assume I can't be upset and it isn't serious.
And then after having my boundaries ignored too many times despite having calmly explained how and why it's a problem [shaking inside or not]... I leave. I leave and everyone gets upset like this is unexpected behaviour, even though I told them 50 times that is how I would respond if they kept doing *the thing.*
And for neurotypical people especially, they are expecting there to be a disconnect between what someone says they need or feel and what their actually boundaries and feelings are, and they expect the latter to be demonstrated with emotions. Telling them bluntly you do not function that way somehow never helps?
My mother isn't just looking for normal yelling or a few tears to know I am serious, whether or not I do those either [I don't], she's looking for an explosion to know there's a problem at all.
Fucked if I know how she proceeds through life this way in general or if this is just her expectation of her own kids???
And I couldn't get why my mother couldn't read my emotions and didn't seem to think I have any. It's because she's testing for the rage limit to see where my 'actual' limit is instead of taking my word for it. Never the fuck mind that she could simply *not* test at my boundaries instead of letting me have them. Separate issue.
I couldn't figure out what made her *like this*
She's expecting me to throw a giant meltdown violent tantrum at people when I have 'actually' had enough. Maybe she got away with those being like 5'4" in another time, but I am the size of the average man, I do not get to have giant screaming rages, whether or not people perceive me consciously as a woman, and least of all because a lot of people -at least unconsciously- read me as 'masculine' or at least always "they guy" of the situation compared to all other women and some men [bigger stronger and more rational, more able to just absorb the damage and let it go so the less rational screaming/crying one doesn't have to be dealt with]. Even if it was in me to be willing to terrify people [usually never], there are such limited instances where it wouldn't just blow back on me. Potentially very dangerously.
I am going to be the quiet calm one. You are going to have to let me use my words, bitch.
So she kept ignoring my boundaries until I had to cut her out of my life, and she probably doesn't understand and probably thinks it feels sudden -after 36 long years of bullshit- abrupt and unfair.
But I told her hundreds of times.
I probably should have just screamed at her.
#good stay out of our yard' and he didn't seem to know what to say to that#but other than that I don't think anyone in my adult life has ever seen me turn aggressive at all to the point where people 100% like to#play games of testing my patience and my boundaries because they think my tolerance is infinite#but like I have autistic rage tantrums on both sides of my family and they are just happening inside my head#And somehow it took me until now to realize that being that way was actually -expected- of me by my parents and especially my mother#and that by keeping myself outwardly level headed to be considerate I actually took away whatever signals she can understand#to have empathy for how I must be feeling#I mean it's still all on her#but it makes so much sense of why she's fucking *like this*#And why my sister thinks I hate her just because -she- stopped texting -me-#but that fucking guy#Every time I was like#In my adult life I have screamed at someone ONE whole time and it was 1000% deserved#And I threw heavy objects around one whole other time and in my defense I didn't do it in front of the guy he just felt the ground shaking#heard the thuds and came back to the logs blocking his path because that fucker wouldn't stop parking in our yard after being asked#and then TOLD not to about 10 times because he was acting entitled to just park in our yard and was crushing my plants???#seriously I don't know what his deal was but he wouldn't stop telling me how much the ground shaking scared him like it was supposed#to get my pity like I think this guy took one look at the logs I had just tossed down and was suddenly afraid of this “woman” he was#bullying in their own yard and so my ability to feel bad for scaring him had gone straight out the fucking window#I looked at him and said stop parking in our yard instead of your own you are killing my plants#he'd just fucking be like 'well the last people to live here let us D: :)“ and I'd be like ”good for them?“ ”stop“#and he'd just keep doing it#I was having a week of insomnia and was finally having the best dream#the kind of sex dream you have like twice in your life#and this fucker had just gotten some noisy ass little bike with a spoiler on it#and starts it up right under my window at 3am from IN OUR FUCKING YARD#so I had a nice long anger nap and just after he got home from work and was sleeping in his house#I picked up these chunks of deadwood tree from the back#there was like 3-4 logs that used to be a WHOLEASS fucking oak tree Like these logs were not as heavy as they -looked- but they were still#this fucker deleted half the tags I wrote and I am not retyping that fuck you tumblr so fucking hard
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i will meet you on another planet if the plans change
be on your own way, daughter.
#the100edit#the 100#bellamy x octavia#bellamyblakeedit#octaviablakeedit#blake siblings#*#octavia and bellamy going from all the other has in the world#and each in their own ways fighting that and clinging to it in equal measure#to octavia choosing peace and her family on skyring with the desperate hope that one day she will see bellamy again#and the faith that if nothing else he will know she was happy and know what he meant to her and that will bring him peace#bellamy letting octavia go in s1 even though it goes against everything he is and trusting he will see her again#how desperate each of them are at the end of s4 to see each other again and begin to repair what was so horribly damaged#bellamy losing octavia just when he had her again#the parallels in this relationship the extremes#the letting each other go and finding each other again#learning to love and extend that fierce blake loyalty to other people and each of them being better for it#how even still there is always a part of them reserved for the other and they can never be truly free of each other#there's just nothing like them you know????
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my issue is that 2 weeks ago I was flip flopping on what decision to make while being very convinced that I wanted to try to leave and that doing so would make me happy and no matter how difficult it was it would be worth it. Just like how i wanted my surgery but was still wracked with guilt leading up to it. Now im stressed and obsessively thinking about it while being convinced that leaving would not make me happy at all and would not be worth it. which is a lot harder...
#talkys#and its extra hard bc the surgery is the only thing in my life I've been 100% sure about.#also my brain is doing the extra steps stuff and im already exhausted especially since i once again dont really have#family on my side or excited for me#thinking about having to have them drive me up for the job interview then having to get apartment#lease and then having to organize and throw away and pack my stuff and then unpack it#while never knowing if rent is going to be way too high next year is already too much#knowing that i love being alone but would be very lonely and not have any extended time to come home and spontaneously#go to the movies or some local event with my siblings makes me sad#the only friend id have in the new location has her own life and partner and such. id just be alone and not#wanting to leave my apartment bc i hate driving#the good times here are rare but they'd be non-existent in an empty apartment#and id likely be too tired to do hobbies after work and chores and staying alive#the color rly has drained from me not even the thought of being able to transition is saving me#nothing would change for the better
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god i finally watched new episodes my honest reaction is jgiwoaoKzmxmkwkakkak
#it kinda doesnt feel real for me idk why#like i do not actually process all of it??#tho I DO have ideas and thinking i did pay attention#maybe i've just had a wild day i guess#but also oh god vex'ahlia broke my heart#twice#first time were when scanlan was talking how he couldn't be at two places at the same time to help 'em and she said nobody gives a fuck#i feel so bad for scanlan rn i love him#haven't watched campaing to the bard's lament yet but oh fuck im too spoiled i do know what happens where (a little bit)#the second time was when she said she really cares for percy i started crying at that moment#also im a lil bit disappointed cuz i thought we would get percys death and vex's spech but we got “i open the door completly naked” scene ->#and im very happy we got it like oh wow i didn't expect that#but idk im just a girl and i love percahlia's slowburn#since i watched 64 eps of actual campaign it become hard for me to not compare campaign and tlovm cuz obviosly its very different#but with percahlia in tlovm we don't have hours and hours of campaign context#(we don't have percy making her arrows)#and i understand why cuz 100+ streams 3+ hours each is one thing and animated series with 12 eps of 25 minutes is another#but as i said previosly it is very hard for me to not compare it#by the way i do think changes in tlovm make sense#cuz like?? i think vex is more sharpy in tlovm than in campaign?? like#like she punced scanlan in first season and in campaign they are kinda good friends and i really love them??#*punched#and i think she's more ?? bossy i guess?? idk how to put it into words but in my head it makes sense “i open the door completly naked” ->#goes earlier than “i shouldve told you its yours” cuz shes playing pretend even more than in campaign???#acts like its casual when its actually isnt AT ALL#and im glad percy said “what is it i want” to vex cuz its kinda like that scene in campaign when percy talked to vax#when he called them all family for the first time and said he's trying to find what he wants in life#i love percy and vax dynamic btw#i wanted to write even more here but apparently i can do only 30 tags wtf#they want me to actually write posts oh no. hate to put it all in tags but im too nervous abt posting on the internet
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My mom getting a new place is kinda making me anxious I think she thinks I’m gonna move in w her instead of my dad 😭 and I’m not sure why I don’t want to. Cuz she’s way better. But I don’t. And I feel responsible I think and plus my sisters will never favor my mom over my dad… so we’d live apart. but I’m 20 years old I can live whatever I want. But. But but but
#idk I really like our house too. it’s great. it’s exactly my style. I would miss it LMAO#but again my mom is just.. she’s so much more organized and she and my stepdad actually get stuff done#and take care of themselves. living w her would be more like we’re roommates and not how it is w my dad#who needs to be taken care of and doted on like a child. my sisters too but I don’t think they’d survive living without me at my dads 💀#or they’d be really pissed at me. at the least#my dads house is constantly horrible so messy so so so bad no free counterspace anywhere can barely walk thru the house and cat vomit#everywhere. unless I take care of all of it. I can’t have company over unless I know a week in advance so I can make it look like a normal#house. and at my moms it’s never like that. it’s messier than average sure but it’s never disgusting like that#people are always telling me not to do anything and let my family learn to clean up after themselves but if I don’t it will just get worse#and worse. they’ll wait weeks before doing anything. it’s embarrassing. and depressing. if I let it go long enough I am miserable every day#after being homeless or on the verge of homelessness for 10 years my dad can’t even appreciate the fantastic house we have 😭#he has to fuck it all up. it’s not 100% his fault bc my sisters do fuck all but he DID teach them to be this way. the only reason I do#anything is because I snapped out of planning to kill myself and realized that I needed to be there for my sisters. so I started being like#their parent more and more. but they still never learned to unload the dishwasher or take out the trash without screaming about it.#I’m just very overwhelmed and nervous about this move. I also feel horrible as if I’m disappointing my mom if I don’t move in. I don’t want#to disappoint her any more than I already have..#she is soooo excited about giving me a room the basement so I can have my bunnies there..
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i really need to just let it go
#i just don't understand my parents at all#they're not even selfish people#it's just like nothing i could ever need warrants helping me if it's an imposition at all#and it's not just me. i highly doubt they've ever helped out my brother either#and the one time they did help my sister it was for something that arguably benefited them too#and it was just kind of a lucky coincidence for her it didn't really put them out at all#but like what the hell why doesn't my health/quality of life matter to them seemingly at all#i often feel guilty for the way i prioritize my close friends over my family but time and time again theyre the ones who come through for m#idk why im making whiny oversharing posts at 2am but whatever#got a reality check today that i apparently needed#i don't know why i can't get this through my head#as if i wasn't literally dying right under their noses and they didn't care then either#that's literally why i left#but being across the country and only seeing them once a year has a way of making you forget i suppose#im mad at myself for expecting anything tbh like it's 100% on me. I've never done it before and there's no reason to start now#i let myself get carried awsy i guess after my mother expressed some sort of concern for the first time in my entire life
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