#if it was JOEY that SAID it and IMPLIED as MY lover perhaps �� i would’ve believed them

[bibleofficial]

i'm sorry but this is 1 of the funniest spam texts i've gotten

[lucky-katebishop]

What I Read in August 2021

I... my first draft got deleted and that took forever to make so please like this for my sanity. I bookmarked 26 fics and read 1 book this month, so not as much as my previous two months but still! The majority is Harry Potter, but there's a spare Sherlock one and Friends one in there. A lot of these fics have other people raising Harry because that's just what I've been in the mood for lately.

Friends

For someone to ripple the waters by teatrolley

Plot: He’s fine, though, he tells himself. He’s dealing with it. He’s dating girls, and using the excuse that he’s bad at it when Joey asks him why he never brings anyone home anymore. He’s fine. That is, until Joey kisses him at New Year’s, and everything changes. Or: Chandler is in love with Joey and it's not the sort of thing you say out loud. Until, one day, it is

Characters: Chandler, Joey, Monica

Relationships: Chandler/Joey

Warnings: none

Tags: canon compliant, friends to lovers, POV Chandler, Chandler is gay, coming out

My Notes: I watched a lot of Friends over August and just!!! Chandler and Joey were the Troy and Abed of the 90s, I said what I said. This fic is so beautiful, the prose is amazing and it’s so heartfelt and it did make me tear up a little bit. I don’t typically read fics for sitcoms but I highly 100% recommend this one!

*complete*

Sherlock (stand-alone)

Feel the Tide by positivelymeteoric

Plot: Things John Watson doesn't expect to do when he transfers to a new school: A) Befriend his (possibly) mad roommate. B) Investigate a particularly nasty streak of murders with his (most likely) mad roommate. C) Fall slightly (or not so slightly) in love with his (definitely) mad roommate. D) All of the above.

Characters: Sherlock, John, Harry Watson, Mycroft, Lestrade, Moriarty

Relationships: Sherlock/John

Warnings: none

Tags: teen!lock, high school

*complete*

Harry Potter & Sherlock

My Experiment by lemoncurry

Plot: Sherlock steals a boy. Sorry- rescues. John helps, because what choice does he have? But not even Sherlock knows just how not-boring things will be...

Characters: Sherlock, John, Harry Potter, Mycroft

Relationships: none

Warnings: implied/referenced child abuse

Tags: pre-Hogwarts

*incomplete* [last updated 2013]

Logic, Meet Luna by Applepie

Plot: Luna Lovegood has moved into 221c Baker Street! So what happens when you mix a 'loony' pureblood witch in a muggle area with logic driven residents? Err... not much, really. Just a whole lot of confusion.

Characters: Luna, Sherlock, Mycroft, John, Lestrade, Sally Donovan

Relationships: none

Warnings: none

Tags: humor

*complete*

Recalibration by Noxilicious

Plot: Mycroft more or less finds himself constantly cleaning up his dear brother’s messes, but in the case of one Harold William Holmes-Evans, he might just prove to be the one ‘mistake’ he won’t be able to rectify.

Characters:

Relationships: Sherlock/Lily Potter; Mary/John; Sherlock & Harry

Warnings: none

Tags: parentlock, canon compliant, pre-prisoner of Azkaban, post series 3, family drama, angst, hurt/comfort, muggle Sherlock, Sherlock is a Good Parent, Sherlock has a Heart, protective Sherlock, genius Harry, bogus deductions, fluff

*incomplete* [last updated 2017]

In Search of Companionship by kris799

Plot: After the events of the Sign of Three, Sherlock falls into a bout of melancholy; Mycroft, the consummate manipulator, suggests "filling the gap" and events largely get out of hand from there. A Sherlock adopts Harry!fic, set between Episodes Two and Three of Season Three.

Characters: Sherlock, Harry, Mrs Hudson, Mycroft, John, Mary

Relationships: Sherlock & Harry

Warnings: none

Tags: Parent!Sherlock, Child!Harry, adoption, John is out of the picture but not really, manipulative!Mycroft, magic, slow paced, perhaps glacial, Sherlock has many thoughts, and a mental!John to call him out on his crap, he’s not crazy, Harry cooks, and tries to take care of everyone, bored!Sherlock leads to bad [great] ideas, set in season 3

My Notes: don’t get your hopes up for Sherlock to find out about magic, it doesn’t happen and since the last time this was updated was almost seven years ago, I don’t think we’ll get to read it. However, it’s still very good and while it does give off some weird Sherlock stalkery vibes, this fic still kept me engaged and Sherlock and Harry’s relationship is great.

*incomplete* [last updated 2015]

Harry Potter of Baker Street by Dayja

Plot: Sherlock Holmes discovers family he never knew he had, and John Watson finds a child living in the cupboard.

Characters: Harry, Sherlock, John

Relationships: none

Warnings: none

Tags: family, friendship

My Notes: this one!!! Is so amazing!!! It’s so cute! I don’t really like to read kid fics all that much, but this one is worth the read!

*complete*

No Thank You by IHScribe

Plot: Harry Potter declines to attend Hogwarts, and Albus Dumbledore is forced to go and convince him otherwise. Too bad he didn’t expect the boy’s father(s).

Characters: Sherlock, John, Harry, Dumbledore, Mrs Hudson, Mycroft, Moriarty, McGonagall, Pomfrey, Hagrid, Snape

Relationships: Sherlock/John

Warnings: none

Tags: none

My Notes: this one is very funny and very sweet. Honestly fuck Hogwarts.

*complete*

Friend by esama

Plot: Sherlock finds the skull when he's five.

Characters: Sherlock, Harry, Mycroft, Mrs Holmes

Relationships: Sherlock & Harry

Warnings: character death

Tags: kid fic, alternate universe

My Notes: This one is so cool and original! I never thought about where Sherlock’s skull came from!

*complete*

Harry Potter & Supernatural

The Youngest Winchester by TheLastWincehsterStanding

Plot: Harry James Potter had thought, given the current circumstances, that going to America to track down his biological father was a fantastic idea. Unfortunately, like most of Harry's plans, there had been very little planning and far too much impulsiveness. Had he known what sort of monsters lurked in America, he would've stayed in England.

Characters: Harry, Bobby Singer, Dean Winchester, John Winchester, Sam Winchester

Relationships: Harry & Dean & Sam Winchester; Harry & John Winchester; Harry & Bobby Singer

Warnings: none

Tags: non-Potter Harry, the hunt for Yellow Eyes, season 1 of Supernatural, book 5, surprise! It’s a sixteen year old boy!

My Notes: I don’t really remember this one, I’ve read like four of these types of Harry being a Winchester story and I generally forget what happens in this one

*incomplete* [last updated 2018]

Harry Potter (stand-alone, specifically Percy Weasley/Oliver Wood)

That escalated quickly by SquaresAreNotCircles

Plot: Percy and Oliver get stuck in a Ministry lift (with seven other people present).

Characters: Percy, Oliver, Fred, George, Ginny, Bill, Ron, Charlie, Arthur, original male character

Relationships: Percy/Oliver

Warnings: none

Tags: humor, fluff

*complete*

Petty Theft by pinksnowboots

Plot: Percy pilfers Oliver's sweater. The twins are suspicious.

Characters: Percy, Oliver, Fred, George

Relationships: Percy/Oliver

Warnings: none

Tags: slice of life, drabble, sweaters, accidental coming out, established relationship, sharing clothes, quidditch, Oliver is protective

*complete*

Five Times Percy Thought Oliver was Beautiful and One Time Oliver Did Something About It by hufflebadgerinthetardis

Plot: The rule worshiping, strict, and by-the-books Gryffindor Prefect Percy Weasley has a secret. He’s got a huge crush on fellow Gryffindor and Quidditch Captain Oliver Wood. Percy was resigned to loving him from afar but he should have remembered that secrets don’t stay secrets for long at Hogwarts.

Characters: Percy, Oliver, Fred, George

Relationships: Percy/Oliver

Warnings: none

Tags: none

*complete*

Burn Across the Sky by MoonytheMarauder1 (beforethemoon)

Plot: When Oliver Wood stops talking about Quidditch to stare at Percy Weasley, Ron, Fred, and George know something is up.

Characters: Percy, Oliver, Ron, Harry, Hermione, Fred, George, Angelina, Alicia, Katie

Relationships: Percy/Oliver

Warnings: none

Tags: secret relationship, bad matchmaking, humor, protective siblings, quidditch, gay Percy, gay Oliver, injury, the hospital wing, exasperated Hermione, Harry is oblivious

My Notes: this isn’t the full plot, but it was very long and I only have so much time. Read this, it’s very cute

*complete*

I dare you to dare me by SquaresAreNotCircles

Plot: Fred didn’t even blink. “Harry said he didn’t want to join.” “So did I,” Oliver murmured. George didn’t allow him to stall any longer. He put his feet up between Fred and Angelina on the sofa and tilted his chair on its hind two legs. “Oliver, mate, truth or dare?”

Characters: Percy, Oliver, Fred, George, Angelina, Alicia Spinnet, Katie Bell

Relationships: Percy/Oliver

Warnings: none

Tags: truth or dare, Gryffindor Quidditch Team, the consumption of innocent earthworms, fluff

*complete*

It’s the truth by SquaresAreNotCircles

Plot: Fred and George refuse to believe Percy has a girlfriend. Oliver seems to know more. It's all very mysterious, until it isn't.

Characters: Percy, Oliver, Fred, George, Ginny, Harry, Hermione, Ron

Relationships: Percy Weasley/Oliver Wood

Warnings: none

Tags: fluff

My Notes: Percy and Oliver really are just teenage Sherlock and John, aren’t they? Just saner and have less crimes involved.

*complete*

Harry Potter (stand-alone)

Harry Potter and His Increasingly Worrying Letters Home by hopeless_hope

Plot: Dear Mum & Dad, Sorry my letters have been brief lately. I hope you’re all well! Just wanted to let you know that my friends and I stumbled upon a three-headed dog on the forbidden corridor that the stairs rather determinedly took us to. Is that normal? Love, Harry… or In which Lily and James survive Voldemort's attack, Sirius is never sent to Azkaban, and long-distance parenting is hard. Especially when your reckless Gryffindor child keeps sending concerning letters home and rushing into trouble before anyone has the chance to respond.

Characters: Harry, Hermione, Ron, Lily, James, Sirius, Remus, Draco, Snape, Dumbledore

Relationships: James/Lily; Sirius/Remus; Harry & Lily; Harry & James; Harry & Sirius; Harry & Hermione & Ron

Warnings: none

Tags: everyone lives/nobody dies, Lily and James live, angst and humor, the Golden Trio, most things are the same except now harry has adults who care about him, the marauders are a lil happy family, not peter tho bc fuck that guy, fix-it, friendship, harry grows up with a loving family but he’s still a reckless little shit

My Notes: this is another fic I’m very excited about. Reading new fics is something I don’t do often, I usually sort my fics by kudos and go backwards from there which usually means I miss out on amazing stuff like this! I do have to wait, which is a pain, but I’m still very excited about this fic, I see a lot of potential in it.

*incomplete* [last updated 1 August]

turn and face the strange by viennawaitss

Plot: ‘He sees himself as a creature of evolution, or perhaps a phantom of peculiarities - a great, winding python, yearning for the snap of his jaw, a snowy lamb, unchristened and stumbling across land on trembling legs.’ Reality, growth and the steps toward change. Or, how Harry’s brief expulsion isn’t the worst thing to happen to him.

Characters: Harry, Hermione, Ron, Blaise, Pansy, Sirius, Theo Nott, Draco

Relationships: none

Warnings: implied/referenced child abuse

Tags: resorting, trauma, nightmares, the Golden Trio, book 5, Slytherin Harry, friendship, mental health issues, growing up, coming of age, and already fighting the government

My Notes: I am so freaking excited for this fic! It has everything I want! Resorted Slytherin Harry, dealing with abuse and trauma, amazing Slytherin friendships, I mean come on!

*incomplete* [last updated 19 August]

Know this: in some way, you’re already dead by ulittuq

Plot: Harry has been fighting against being an obscurial his entire life and Sirius’ death is what pushes him over the edge.

Characters: Harry, Dumbledore, Tom Riddle

Relationships: none

Warnings: implied/referenced child abuse, canonical character death, some noncanonical character death, suicidal thoughts

Tags: obscurial Harry, ambiguous/open ending

My Notes: part of a series but both fics are very short. It's only about 2k words.

*complete*

The Chosen One and The Halfblood Prince by waitingondaisies

Plot: Severus Snape was discovered as a spy mere days before the start of the school year. Thankfully, Albus had been working on a vague contingency plan for this possibility. It had been inspired by the question, “What would it take for Severus Snape to see that he was wrong about Harry Potter?” The answer? Force Severus to go undercover as Alfonse “Eli” Hopkirk, a sixth year Gryffindor.

Characters: Harry, Ginny, Snape, Hermione, Ron, Dumbledore, McGonagall, Neville, Luna

Relationships: Harry & Ginny; Harry & Snape; Hermione/Ron

Warnings: child abuse

Tags: angst, undercover, Harry needs a hug, slow burn friendship, Ginny is a good friend, not canon compliant - HBP, no Snape as defensive teacher, no Slughorn

My Notes: this one is so fun! Snape tries to act as a sixteen year old and it goes as well as you’d think. It’s really funny but also really heartfelt, it’s part of a series of two and the second one is more Severitus than the first.

*complete*

By His Side by silver_fish

Plot: After what is surely a more-than-preventable potions accident, Harry Potter winds up stuck in the hospital wing, unable to wake up. Severus just wishes he knew why Poppy won’t stop bothering him about it.

Characters: Harry, Snape, Pomfrey, Ron, Hermione, Dumbledore

Relationships: Harry & Snape

Warnings: references to addiction

Tags: severitus I guess? Just some good bonding, set during HBP, harry is sad and so am i, emotional hurt/comfort

*complete*

Unmasked Lilly’s - Year One by TheWillofTheQuill

Plot: Severus Snape was adamant, no - determined to hate Harry Potter. After all, he was the spawn of James Potter, his childhood bully. But when Harry turns up for his first year, malnourished and fearful, it is up to Snape to solve the mystery of why the small boy has bruises that he will not show and scars that will not heal. Sworn to protect Lilly's son, Severus Snape is about to face his hardest challenge yet; gaining the trust of a boy who has sworn to never trust again.

Characters: Harry, Snape, Dumbledore, Draco, Hermione

Relationships: future Drarry

Warnings: child abuse

Tags: Severitus, hurt/comfort, angst, abused Harry, Snape adopts Harry, Slytherin Harry, good Slytherins

*incomplete* [last updated July 2021]

A Pair of Shoes that Fit by Darkorangecat (Calacious)

Plot: Harry is lost in the Forbidden Forest when he goes looking for Neville’s Remembrall after Draco steals it from the boy once again. As Harry wanders the forest, wondering if he’ll ever make it back to Hogwarts, the entire staff is sent out to look for him, including a much peeved Severus Snape.

Characters: Harry, Snape

Relationships: none

Warnings: child abuse and neglect

Tags: Snape eventually adopts Harry, first year, hurt/comfort, angst

My Notes: this one is so cute and so sad, Harry’s only eleven in this fic and Snape is trying his best

*complete*

The Guiltless by branwyn

Plot: When Harry appears at the Welcoming Feast wearing a glamor only Snape notices, Snape decides to find out what the glamor is hiding.

Characters: Harry, Snape, Luna, Dumbledore

Relationships: Harry & Snape & Luna

Warnings: domestic violence, child abuse

Tags: Severitus, Snape mentors Harry, hurt/comfort

*complete*

Within Doors by Lomonaaeren

Plot: It takes three detentions for Severus Snape to realize why Harry Potter cleans cauldrons so well—and even more for him to decide what to do about it.

Characters: Harry, Snape

Relationships: Harry & Snape

Warnings: canonical child abuse

Tags: angst, detention, present tense

*complete*

Summer of Bonding by MagicaDraconia16

Plot: It was the summer of love . . . er, no, not really. Left waiting for the Dursleys, Harry is found by the last person he'd expect to see.

Characters: Harry, Snape, Dumbledore, Flitwick, Hermione, Ron, Molly, Fred, George, original house-elf characters, original male character, Stan Shunpike, Dobby

Relationships: Harry & Severus

Warnings: canon-typical violence, child abandonment, minor violence

Tags: humor, angst, nightmares of canon-typical violence, spiders, awkwardness, someone else (not Snape or Harry) dies too

My Notes: this one is so sweet and really captures how awkward Harry and Snape are

*complete*

Harry Potter & Everything

Raising Harry Collection by Steerpike13713

Fandoms: Harry Potter, Daredevil, Sherlock, Labyrinth, Batman, Gravity Falls, MCU, Once Upon a Time, Doctor Strange (comics), Buffy, Merlin

Plot: A collection of unrelated fics that have to do with people other than The Dursleys raising Harry Potter

Characters: too many to name, really

Relationships: Matt Murdock/Foggy & Belle/Rumplestiltskin

Warnings: none

Tags: genderqueer Loki, genderqueer Lily Evans, Loki is Lily Evans Potter

My Notes: since the fics are unrelated you can flip flop around the chapters to find the ones you really want to read. I think my favorite ones are the Batman and Daredevil ones :) (also the author wrote a really good Lucifer & Chaos Adventures of Sabrina series)

*complete*

[cruddyborderlandstheories]

this DLC has me FUCKED UP and i keep screaming

spoilers for Bounty of Blood under the cut, keep reading at ur own peril. Also some Guardian Takedown spoilers for anyone who hasn’t beat it yet

tl;dr: a comparison between something taken from BL2 and a thing taken from Bounty of Blood. more spoilery tl;dr below the cut.

also the siren thing is not spoilers so i’ll share it here for anyone curious, it’s just this: siren tattoos are blue but when lily absorbs eridium in 2, they turn pinkish/purple. just like how vaults do from bl1 to bl2. they’re white/blue in bl1, then purple-pink in bl2 (and tps), y’know, after Eridium begins erupting from the ground. just a neat little detail i noticed that im not entirely sure was intentional but im gonna believe it is.

tl;dr: Gythian Blood = Core and the Ruiner is of Eridian Origin even tho everyone in the DLC likes to say it was created with Jakobs’ bioengineering. disclaimer: idk if I’ve found every hidden ECHO so I may be missing a few things but I have done every side quest and took ample screenshots of all important dialogue in the DLC : )

“man i just sat here for like 15 minutes staring at my keyboard mentally comparing core and eridium like the dumb bitch i am. 

it's not like we can do an actual comparison because we have no idea what the natural fauna of gehenna was like before jakobs came and mutated everything with core unlike pandora where we know what skags and rakk and shit were like BEFORE the eridium crust erupted. 

altho!!! there's a neat comparison between joey ultraviolet and rose. like obviously he wasn't getting tattoos and was just doing lines of crushed up eridium but the point stands they both have glowy eyes and unique powers so i don't necessarily think this means rose is a siren just because she has magic powers especially when we know she got the whistling passed down to her from her grandmother. 

especially because we've never seen a siren interact with core before. altho that leaves the question we have seen core tattoos now what are eridium tattoos like? actually rose's tattoos were on her right arm obviously she isn't a siren as we know them right now (I saw a post on reddit where people thought rose was a siren) 

of course that brings up the point perhaps siren tattoos ARE eridium tattoos. but then we hear the general's log about how the devil riders were tattooing a man with core and blood so obviously they're not ‘naturally’ occurring unlike siren tattoos. so odds are they're probably not equivalents but something interesting i thought of while thinking about this is how well siren tattoos compare to the Vaults from borderlands 1 and borderlands 2″

anyway. this is all ive been thinking about. yes yes i know guardian takedown post but! >:( im still salty even tho this update has been lovely (outside of Blane not getting his correct damage scaling ‘till today......). so i’ll do that at my own damn pace. now let me elaborate so i can sleep at night lmao

Eridium

refinement produces slag, which weakens people and can mutate things

has mutating properties, mostly with imbuing elements into shit- possibly causes insanity

seems to be connected to another dimension, likely the one the Eridians are from

Core

has a secondary form of Infused Core

has mutating properties, mostly regarding a thing’s body and mind

apparently radioactive

there are some things i wanna note

1) People throughout the DLC say the Ruiner was created by the Jakobs corp (the company) thru bio-engineering but I’m 99% sure that’s not true. The paperwork seems to me like they found the egg somewhere on Gehenna and decided to roll and experiment with it like all corporations do when they find weird alien shit. so maybe they experimented with whatever was inside the egg, but I don’t think they actually created it entirely

“Excavated from [REDACTED] ... Local legends speaks of a [REDACTED]. This theory is not endorsed by our research personnel.

2) The Ruiner’s design reminds me a lot of the Warrior.

3) Core immediately reminded me of Gythian Blood from Guns Love and Tentacles and I don’t think that’s coincidence to have 2 back-to-back DLCs where the big bad is focused on green death juice. I think Gythian Blood and Core are of the same stuffs.

4) Therefore, I think the Ruiner is (mostly) of Eridian origin (if you haven’t already guessed). 

This gives us an amazing look into how the Eridians actually create their beasts!!! And I’m so happy they showed us this.

(side note, Interitus Regina (the long name for Ruiner) literally means Destruction Queen and I think that’s beautiful <3)

i mean the idea that they plunge them from orbit to create an explosion similar to a nuke is fucking horrifying (but holy shit I love it so much ahhh it’s so cool!!!!)

the one side line from Oletta about how the company couldn’t control the Ruiner deffo makes me double down on this theory. I’m not entirely sure how Rose’s grandma knew about the whistling (I don’t think I’ve found every echo log in that area YET), but I would bet it was part of the testing given how many fuckin’ tape players they have throughout the facility. The Warrior was controlled by verbal commands via Jack, so it’s possible that the Ruiner was intended to be controlled similarly, but Jakobs intervention (or something like the way Rose hatched it) fucked it up.

now we know the Warrior was created to protect the Vault of the Destroyer (hmm.) so what the heck was the Ruiner created for? Ruiner is a name given to it by Jakobs/the people of Gehenna so we can’t really assume, but then again the monster names are pretty apt in this series even tho they probably technically shouldn’t be. 

it was only an egg, so maybe it was another test of Core? A Vault Monster incubating until it was ready to protecc and attacc but was never hatched because the Eridians ‘sacrificed’ themselves before it could? (I’m still not convinced the Eridians are the good guys. Listen. LISTEN. The guardian takedown is something to think about, BUT it doesn’t disprove that theory and I’ll stand by it because I 100% trust the Overseer more than bitchpants mcgee over here who thinks he’s soooo special for no reason fuck you and your dumb ‘I did what the Watcher could not’ bull you haven’t done shit.) ok sorry im done he just angers me. stupid guardian man. your whip is stupid and you should feel bad. oh also I totally called us actually being Guardians thru Guardian Rank before the game came out aha yeah.

I definitely think Gythian was a test/use of Core from the Eridians. We see in Bounty of Blood that core seems to mutate more the physical (and occasionally mental) parts of people, like with the crew challenges u do for Juno with all the weird hybrid people and whatnot. Gythian had the whole ‘the heart still beats’ thing going on (which is definitely a physical mutation if i’ve ever seen one), plus the whole, you know, mind control and shit. Which is p similar to what the menta gnats can do when charged with Infused Core. And keep in mind in BLaT we see DAHL notes on what happens to test subjects when injected with Gythian Blood. They mutated physically and went insane.

What im saying is Sirens and Eridium and Elements are connected, so what does Core equal? body/mind sure but are there unique creatures for core (yes holy shit I’m not talking about h2o au for once and FINALLY they gave us a canon name for the green stuff!!!). If not, I’d love to see a Siren interact with Core to see what it does to them. seriously why hasn’t tannis interrupted us yet. horrible excuse for a science lover (kidding kidding, I love her). I’d also really love a fuller rundown on what the hell Rose’s powers were. Because the whistling thing seemed to just be her grandma’s thingie passed down to her from her mom

but the core stuff

her gun seems to be infused with it. So did her sword thing. I didn’t really get a good look at it i was too busy trying to see thru my blurry tears of LOVE for this DLC.

Strangely while her tattoos are (mostly) green I actually don’t know if they’re core infused bc look at this

n look back at hers. hers aren’t very lime.

anyway

her eyes

I’d love to know if the core gives her immediate future sight or just increased perception or reaction times. there’s a huge difference but she seemed to be able to shoot the gun outta the sheriff’s hand near immediately and it seems kinda implied its because of the core (or at least because her eyes are glowing green)

there’s a possibility she has some unique core powers/possibly implants because of her relations to the project in the first place, or as leader of the devil riders after looting the facility. it’s really hard to say without more info and like i said im not sure if i missed an ECHO or two or not regarding her backstory :( 

Her hair is also green which I just noticed. Maybe she has core powers bc her grandmother got suuuuuuuuper irradiated/influenced working on project horizons and it passed down thru her n Rose’s mom, to Rose. Tannis does have a line about Sirens having unique hair colors and, if Sirens are linked to Eridium, perhaps those linked to Core also have unique hair color. Could also explain why only Rose seems to have those whistling powers. That said we don’t really see anyone else trying that whistling thing out afaik and idk if it was, like, a special ability or a certain tone/ditty or w h a t. 

i know being vague with everything gives them more creative freedom to create amazing characters and scenarios, but dammit I want A N S W E R S.

All THAT said man I’m so glad magic is real in the borderlands universe. oh, sorry, “magic”. It’s magic. Science it, tannis, I dare you. either way, I win. Either it’s magic and H2O AU is canon, or it’s science and I finally get my goddamn answers. Hey gearbox can you make a book just explaining all the science and eridian stuff. please. I’d love you forever. please. pleaheheheheaaasseee it’s all i’ve ever wanted.

oh also can i just say, suuuper disappointed we didn’t learn anything about anshin. Really wish non-fan favorite corporations would get the spotlight/lore for once. Like, I like Jakobs as much as the next guy, and I get WHY they did it (can’t have a corporation looking too good!!!) but they now have 3 DLCs (Jakobs Cove, GLaT, and Bounty of Blood) and also a hefty chunk of the main game. Like... we all know Jakobs fuckin sucks, look at what they did on Pandora. I really just want info on a medical corporation 😭 I have to do everything my damn s e l f. but SERIOUSLY IMAGINE the possibilities that could come from a medical corp getting its hands on eridian tech. like, yeah obviously the weapons corps are gonna use it for weaponry and stuff BUT WOULDN’T THE MEDICAL CORPS MUTATING PEOPLE MAKE MORE SENSE??? ldfhgldfshg I have to do everything my damn self...

anyway all that aside, this is definitely by favorite borderlands dlc by a LONG shot. Nothing comes close. Ahhh the lore, the nuclear aspect, the a e s t h e t i c (seriously, have I mentioned how much I adore Trigun???), the art, the music, the cryoslinger, the fact I can bust out going beeEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAans like Ray Chase at any time and it will MAKE SENSE. I love all of it.

oh, also, Rose is totally not dead. C’mon, they couldn’t find her body. She pulled a Lilith. “Are you sure she didn’t just suffer a wound that LOOKS fatal, only for her to come back in a blockbuster sequel...?” is a line from mr Jones himself (the movie guy)

I just hope when she comes back she gets to meet Captain Scarlett. I’d love to watch their interactions plus pirates and or ninjas. That’s 2 DLC villains now that have vanished without a trace. And I like Captain Scarlett way more than Rose (seriously I spent the entire beginning of the DLC complaining about how her voice bothered me- I was so happy she was a villain, I was hoping that was the case).

oh yeah, reminder, the people of vestige were living next to highly radioactive egg for likely years. i feel really bad for them :(

also!!!

this made me smile

[erikmcmanusinc]

We have a very in-depth review for you guys from an addition to the BreakevenBooks team. Our new reviewer Chris Connors decided to take on Booth by Jason Pellegrini.

Synopsis: At dawn, on the day of his execution, Joseph Bateman finds himself reflecting on his life, one filled with poor decisions and evil people. Even his lifelong best friend played a pivotal role in earning Joseph his seat on death row. A phenomenon occurs as the electricity meant to kill Joseph is sent through him, and his essence is ripped from the body he has known his entire life and thrown into a new one. Only the body he now inhabits isn’t new at all; it is the body of a person who lived over a hundred years before Joseph’s birth. Now living in an unfamiliar era of history and trapped inside a foreign body, Joseph learns he has been sent back for a reason: to earn redemption for his damned soul and to find a sense of peace he has never known. All he needs to do to get there is to prevent one of history’s most infamous murders.

The book blurb captured my imagination right away. Obviously, Joseph William Bateman’s redemption is hinged on stopping John Wilkes Booth—note the initials of both names– from killing Abraham Lincoln, but since Booth did kill Lincoln does this mean Joseph didn’t get redemption? Is there an alternate timeline involved? Was redemption in an unexpected form, maybe a surprise twist? I looked forward to seeing how Pellegrini dealt with this.

The first half of the book starts out with Joseph on death row contemplating how he got there, and the writing in the first few chapters pulls you right into the story.

Murdering one man did not get him to where he was in life (although he’d soon learn he was actually very wrong about that). A long series of unfortunate events had landed him on Death Row. So Joseph Bateman, in the closing hour of his life, chose to reflect.

The small details about his early love for jelly beans (his mother called him Joey Beans), the description of their taste and what jelly beans meant to Joseph are well-crafted, putting you in touch with the child whose imagination helped him escape a bad parental situation by turning the Moon into a giant sweet sugary jellybean that was slowly eaten away only to return anew. Through these chapters, we see how childhood and young adulthood events shaped Joseph’s life and led him to the electric chair.

As Joseph grows older we see him fighting to be nothing like his abusive father, fighting to get away and become his own man, to live happily ever after with his early childhood best friend and later his lover. You feel for Joseph knowing, like Romeo and Juliet, that his dreams will not come true and he is his father’s son, but you still root for him hoping it’ll somehow work out despite him being a few hours from his execution.

It is a great start and whatever Pellegrini did for these first few chapters needs to be applied to the other chapters because the rest of the book seems clunky by comparison. His use of long and short sentences that pull the reader into the story, in the beginning, fades away as the chapters continue; much of the sentence structure is the same type with little variation, and the compelling rhythm is lost.

Subtlety is not put to good use in this book. We’re whacked over the head with the obvious on numerous occasions. Considering Joseph is on death row at the start of the book then foreshadowing his fate with statements like “…just one more step on the path that would lead Joseph to death row” over and over seems a bit of overkill (so to speak).

The descriptions of the abuse his father metes out on his mother are cartoonishly over-the-top. He doesn’t just rape, kick and beat her, but also brings home his gambling buddies to rape her. I worked as a Direct Care Worker for 8 years with youth in the justice system and on the streets and I know these things happen. What makes the book scenario so unbelievable is that 1) the father doesn’t abuse the kids (an abusive man doesn’t make that distinction), and 2) the mother stays with him despite all this. There are women who will stay with abusive men till she’s killed. However, Joseph’s mom, Emily Bateman, is portrayed as a saint, a good woman, a great mother. You don’t have those qualities and still, put up with such violence and torture for many years. The women who do stay around to be tortured are often so damaged they’re not capable of being good and kind on a long-term or even regular basis.

In this case, I think Pellegrini could have written less while implying more horror without bludgeoning the reader with the abuse. The father could have been given more of a dimensional character to help us see why Emily didn’t leave him. That being said there are still well-written gems popping out in these sections like how Joseph runs out into the yard to find his sister during a particularly horrible beating of their mother; they end up cuddled together in the trunk of an old car comforting one another. Quite touching, well done.

So Joseph’s reflections– not reminiscences, he tells us (another nice bit of writing detail that makes Joseph a real flesh-and-blood character)—proceed in a chronological order till his execution. The second half of the book deals with Joseph’s death and the transferal of his soul into the late 1800s where he is expected to stop an assassination. I was looking forward to this half of the book.

We meet up with a mysterious figure (the man with eyes) who Joseph has unknowingly met a few times before. This is his guide, called J, a 2,000-year-old soul who betrayed a friend, whose own path to redemption comes from helping others find their redemption (J’s actual name isn’t given, but it’s obvious). Given J’s behavior though I suspect he won’t be finding his own redemption anytime soon. He tells Joseph a few times to watch out for Booth, that Booth will do anything to stop him. However, none of that is true (no spoilers so I can’t elaborate). His early cryptic statements aren’t helpful. He tells Joseph the walls will fall and Joseph will see (I was hoping J would say, “Shaka, when the walls fell; Sokath, his eyes open”, but I guess 2,000-year-old souls don’t keep up with pop culture references).

There’s also a scene where J kills someone by twisting a knife into their stomach and letting them bleed out so the soul can be set free to embark upon a task. Yes, it was necessary, but what happened to a warm bath, a nice bottle of wine, and slitting your wrists? Or a bullet? J will never get redemption if he keeps this up.

This second half of the book is the weakest section. We’re told many times (again) that Joseph is an expert on Booth so knows all of Booth’s movements before and after the assassination. The whole section reads like it was taken from a history book without any fleshing out of characters: he went there, then he saw this, then he did that, next he rode here, he met a doctor, he left a doctor. Bizarrely Joseph re-enacts all of Booth’s movements for the silliest of reasons. If you’re going to change history why not do everything different?

Perhaps a way to improve both sections is to alternate the chapters. Instead of a long chronological recounting of Joseph’s childhood followed by a chronological accounting of his actions in the 1800s, it could be possible to jump back and forth. You end one chapter of Joseph’s childhood wanting to know what happened next, but first you have to read a chapter of him in the past (which when it ends you want to know what happens next, but your next chapter is back to the childhood). It would build and maintain suspense, keep the reader turning pages, make thematic connections between the past and present, and slowly let the story unravel rather than laying everything down in plain sight. It would make us feel we’re traveling between times as the author could add flesh and detail to both worlds.

Fortunately, Pellegrini pulls it back together for the final act. I don’t want to give spoilers, but he delivers an ending and an epilogue worthy of the hopes I had for the book when I first read the blurb. I thought I knew where he was going, and I was partly right, but he still surprised me.

Overall, I liked the concept. It is fairly original. There is some good writing in the book, and an editor would help the author bring that quality writing to the sections that were lacking. I suspect Jason Pellegrini is still on the steep learning curve of writing and will improve immensely with practice. He’s shown he can write well. Now he just needs to do it consistently. I look forward to reading his future books.

Book Rating: 3.75/5

And that is our wonderful review by Chris Connors!

Disclaimer: This book was sent to Breakeven Books by the author Jason Pellegrini for an honest review.

    New book review!! Our new reviewer Chris Connors takes on Booth by @JPellegrini1983 #bookreview #booth #bookblog We have a very in-depth review for you guys from an addition to the BreakevenBooks team. Our new reviewer Chris Connors decided to take on…