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lawslessons · 4 years ago

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A Healing Touch (Law x Reader)

“It just takes one touch, and then you’ll know in an instant that they’re the one for you. They’ll be the one that heals you...”

Hello, dears! I hope you all enjoy this! This is the letter N from the soulmate list, nursing! The premise is that a touch from your soulmate is enough to heal any ailment, any illness forever. Because of my school work load and some health issues, I may be publishing less just to take care of myself. Thank you for understanding. Love you all!

Modern! Au

Warnings: Terminal/Chronic illness, medical devices, mentions of death

Synopsis: It had been years since they had first found out they were sick. Another broken down van and another hospital trip for them to hear news they already knew before: Their illness was chronic and slowly becoming worse as time went on. But one faithful encounter with a certain doctor may be enough to change their path for the better.

“How many years has it been since we found out you had this? Seven? Eight?” Nami asked with a small sigh as she sat with her friend on the small chair that was by the hospital bed. Her friend smiled and shook their head.

“Ten,” Ten softly said as they looked up at the ceiling as the IV in their skin slowly inserted the fluids into their system. Their eyes were somewhat dull and the bags had become more prominent from the lack of sleep these past couple of days and the serious lack of nutrition.

“The feeding tube doesn’t look comfortable,” Nami winced as she looked at the tube inside of her friend’s nose. They laughed and smiled at Nami with an affectionate smile on their face.

“You’re right, it isn’t. But I need this, I haven’t been able to keep food down in days,” they pointed out as they looked at the monitors that were next to them and saw all the vitals they were presenting. “I’m sick of being in these damn hospitals all the time though,” They said as they rubbed their face in some frustration. “I want to be able to go back and explore and have fun with you and the gang again. This is just ridiculous at this point, I’m holding you guys back,” They frowned. Nami frowned with them and moved to hold onto their hand and squeeze it.

“No, no you’re not. You can’t control your illness, no one blames you for that. Besides, maybe we can finally find a doctor here that can actually give more answers inside of just giving you fluids,” Nami sighed, the woman read the look on her friend’s face and saw that they weren’t as confident as she was in having answers so soon for this illness.

“Maybe, I’m not sure,” they sighed. “It’s getting harder each time I’m stuck here,” they said as they looked at their wrist with the numerous hospital bands on it. Nami watched the light beginning to fade from her friend’s eyes and it broke her heart just a little more.

“We can look for another �� “ Nami was quickly cut off by a knock on the door and someone opening the door.

“Is this (Y/N)?” A gruff and tired voice asked as he started to look through his tablet. Part of his face was obscured by his blue mask, but they were able to see some tattoos on his hands as he typed some vital work on his tablet. “I’m the immunology specialist here, I’m here on a special consult for your case,” He said as he checked the fluids being given to them and typed some more.

“What’s your name?” Nami asked.

“Doctor Law,” The man said as he stepped back from the vital machines and looked over at Nami and her friend for a brief second. “Alright, I’m starting you on a new course of antibiotics and we’re going to take some blood samples to get some tests run,” he said as he looked up from his tablet. “Any questions?” It didn’t look like he wanted to ask that, it seemed as if he was forced to ask that out of obligation for his job. They knew that, so they knew better than to ask, but Nami didn’t seem to know that.

“How do you know that you need to start them on something new? You didn’t even do an exam,” she pointed out.

“I don’t need to,” The doctor shrugged, and they sighed at that.

“Nami, it’s alright. It’s not like he’s going to find anything new about my condition anyways,” they sighed. But the moment the words left their lips, they regretted it. Law visibly scowled and he looked away from the two who were in the room with him.

“Excuse me. I need to check on some other patients now,” he said before he went to leave the room a bit rigidly. They both watched as Law left the room and winced when the door was closed a bit roughly behind him. Silence ensued for a moment before Nami began to snicker and laugh.

“Why did you say that? I don’t think it’s a good idea to make your doctor mad,” Nami teased. They rolled their eyes and smiled at their friend.

“It’s whatever, he know’s I’m right. No doctor has been able to figure this out, what makes him think he’s so special?” They asked. Nami had to admit that what they were saying was true, she had even seen this play out in other cities and other hospitals throughout the country. They continued to talk for a few more hours before a nurse came in to inform Nami that it was time for her to leave.

“I’ll see you in the morning, alright?” Nami assured her friend as the nurses changed her friend’s medication and wrote some notes down for the doctor who as working on her friend’s case.

“Yeah, I’ll see you then,” they smiled before they started to drift off to sleep from the heavy doses of the new medication they were now on. They slept for a while until they heard something fall down in their room. They stirred in their sleep and tiredly rubbed their eyes to look up at who was in their room. Their eyes met gray ones and for a moment, the world was still between them.

“Sorry, I dropped my pen,” Law softly said as he picked up his tablet’s pen and pocketed it and looked down at the person who was staring at him. “I’m sorry that I woke you up,” he said as he awkwardly took a step back.

“Why are you here?” They asked.

“I’m checking your levels. You had low sugar and your pulse was low too,” Law explained as he looked at the monitor again. “Your levels are leveling out now, but I’m going to need you to stay here for a few more days for observation. I looked through your medical history and it would put me at ease if you stayed here,” Law said as he looked down at them again. They smirked and shook their head.

“Put you at ease?” They teased. Law scoffed and looked away.

“You know what I mean. I’m waiting on some of your tests results to come back, you know by now how slow the labs can be,” Law casually said as he looked at his tablet again. They were surprised, was he really trying to make conversation with them?

“I do know, I’ve been in and out of hospitals for ten years,” They shared. Law looked over at them and seemed to be giving them more of his attention so they could elaborate. “I was pretty young, like fourteen? Fifteen? I can’t remember, the years are blending together at this point. Anyways, I was just at school and suddenly I wasn’t. Suddenly I couldn’t stomach milk, gluten, anything. And then I felt like I was constantly on fire, I found out I was having an allergic reaction to the air freshener in my house. And when we went to the hospital, we found out that my organs were starting to shut down from how intense the reaction was. More than me being scared, my friends were terrified. My best friend Nami cried so much, we missed prom together with our other friends because of this,” They shared. And before they even knew it, Law pulled up a chair next to them and they spent the rest of the night talking, they honestly would’ve talked longer if it wasn’t for Law’s pager going off.

“I need to take this, I’ll see you later then,” He said before he had to stand up and leave. For the time they were talking to one another, they didn’t feel sick. But the second he was out of the room, their stomach started to turn and churn rather uncomfortably inside of them. They tried to get as much rest as they could before Nami and the rest of the crew came in with masks on.

“Hello! Did you sleep well?” Nami asked as she sat down next to her friend.

“Well — “ “Oi, there was someone weird standing by the door,” Luffy said as he stuffed his hands into his pockets and Zoro pointed at the door.

“Was he tall? Dark hair and with tattoos?” They asked, this emphasis on details didn’t seem to slip by Nami or Robin for that matter.

“Yeah, he was,” Usopp said while they felt their face grow a little more flushed.

“Why don’t you guys go see what’s in the cafeteria while me and Robin talk to them?” Nami suggested. And before anyone could protest, Luffy began to laugh and grab his friend’s by their hands and drag them out of the room to check out the hospital food. “Ok, so what happened after I left? I missed a lot,” Nami pouted while Robin chuckled next to her.

“I didn’t sleep that much last night,” they began before explaining with an embarrassed smile what they and Law had talked about in the night. By the end, Nami had a big smile plastered across her face.

“You like your doctor, don’t you?” Nami teased.

“Hush! No I don’t. I haven’t even known him that long,” they defended.

“I don’t believe that is a good criteria to measure it by,” Robin said with a small smile. Nami nodded in agreement before she pointed an accusatory finger at her friend.

“You’re avoiding the truth because you’re scared! You like him, and that’s ok to admit,” Nami tried to assure them. They looked a little hesitant, they brought their legs up to their chest and sighed.

“I am scared, I will admit that. I’m scared because I haven’t liked someone since I’ve gotten sick and I’m worried about what may happen if I were to one day… you know…” The trio went silent at that and all of their minds began to spin.

“Maybe that won’t happen,” Robin hopefully said, being hopeful like this wasn’t like her, so Nami knew that her friend had more to explain. “There’s this phenomenon where soulmates are able to cure each other of their ailments when they’re finally together,” she explained. Their jaw dropped and they quickly looked away.

“First you say I like him and now you’re saying soulmates? Isn’t that a bit much?” They softly asked. “I mean, I don’t think that’s possible, things like that happen in fairytales to royals, and I am not a royal. I am a regular person who is sick and dying,” a wave of sadness dropped over all of them at their words.

“Dying…?” Nami found herself asking her dear friend. They looked up at the ceiling and sighed softly.

“I’m tired of fighting,” They admitted. They heard the gasp of shock from Nami and could feel the frown from Robin, but that didn’t deter them. “There’s no point if there isn’t a cure. Every time I’m forced to be in a hospital, I get better for a few weeks and then I’m back and I’m worse than before,” their hands grabbed at the blankets as tears began to well into their eye’s. “I’m so tired of all this pain, it never ends…”

A few hours later, Nami and the rest of the group left when a nurse scolded them all for being too loud. When their friends were gone, they found themselves stuck in their own thought again. With their knees at their chest, a flood of negative emotions dropped over them and threatened to drown them before a voice seemed to pull them out of the water.

“I got your lab tests back,” He said as he closed the door behind himself and moved to be standing at the edge of his bed. “As you probably expect, the results aren’t good,” They scoffed at that and turned away from him. Why did he have to be so blunt? Couldn’t he read the situation. “But, I can do something about then,” Law shared as he tried to get them to look at him. He sighed and moved back to be a safe distance away before he pulled his mask down. When they saw his full face, their face went a soft shade of pink. Of course he had to be even more attractive, how was this even possible? “Are you listening to me?“ Law scowled, they quickly snapped out of their little day dream and nodded their head.

“Yes.”

“Anyways,” he sighed in some annoyance. “I need you to trust me,” He then said.

“Why? I don’t even know you that well,” They pointed out. Even though they talked all night, that wasn’t near enough time to get to know who he really was.

“You don’t know me? So what? I need you to trust in my medical skills,” Law sounded a little disappointed but they didn’t seem to care as much. After their talk with Robin and Nami earlier, their mind had been in one spot the entire night.

“And what if I refuse to go through with your treatment?” They asked.

“Your prognosis isn’t good,” Law looked dumbfound that they were even considering refusing his treatment, his advice. “I can only promise you weeks. Maybe a month.” They went quiet at that. The sobering thought of dying from their illness hit them. They didn’t even realize that it had gotten this bad until now.

“A month is all I need,” They finally said as they looked up at Law with a serious and content expression on their face.

“What?” Law asked in a small whisper. Were they being serious? A month? Was that all they really wanted?

“What is living if I’m stuck living in a hospital for another ten years? I would rather live one more month on the road with my friends. Our van is almost fixed, soon we can hit the road again. When it’s done, I want to leave here and live out the rest of my life,” They stated. Law looked absolutely appalled by what they were saying, while he never got involved with patient matters, he couldn’t help but feel drawn to them.

“No.” Law stated. His hands balled into fists and he glared down at the person in front of him. “You didn’t even listen to what I had to say, do you want to die that badly? Why?” Law asked. They didn’t seem to deny that, they knew that they were rejected Law’s suggestion without even listening to him.

“Do you think this is living? Laying down in a hospital bed? Not being able to eat? Crying constantly because of the pain? This isn’t living, this is hell. I’m in hell, Law,” They bluntly stated. “I just want to see heaven even if it’s only for a month, I’d give anything for that,” They admitted with tears freely flowing from their cheeks at this point. That caught Law off guard, he wasn’t expecting there to be tears. He never knew how to handle people who were crying.

“You’re right, that isn’t living,” Law agreed, “But I said I could help you, I just need you to trust me,” Law said as he put his mask on again and moved closer to them. “Do you think you can grow to trust me?” Law asked as he looked down at the patient in their bed. They looked up at Law and felt more tears burst out of them, they were overwhelmed with all the information they were given in one night.

“I’ll try,” They mumbled through their tears. Law sighed in relief and moved to stand back by the door again. If anything, they were only going through this just for Law and to appease him.

“I’ll see you tomorrow then,” Law said before he left.

The next day, the rigid treatment began. It involved Law personally giving injections to them along with fluids and more medications. He spent most of his time in their room over the next few days, and he even had to admit that he had grown attached to them the more time he spent around them. This was bad, wasn’t it? Even the nurses were talking about it.

“Doctor Law is going in there again.”

“I heard he was only here for a consult, but now he’s staying! Why is that?”

“Do you think he likes them?”

Law did his best to ignore all the words from his coworkers, but the more they spoke, the more Law reflected on his actions and the more he realized he was falling for them. Shit.

Days turned into weeks and soon they were two weeks into the process and they seemed to be doing much better than they previously were doing. And Law was too. In the nights, he would grab himself a coffee and go off to the room where they always were in and talked to them about his day at work and would hear about the shenanigans that were happening with their friends. He learned about their whole crew, Luffy was the head of their adventure and then there was Zoro, Sanji and so many others that sounded interesting. They even had a medical student traveling with them named Chopper, it sounded so fascinating to him.

“So, what’s the prognosis now? Think I’ll be better soon?” They asked Law with a hopeful look on their face. Law felt his chest tighten as they began to smile at the poor doctor.

“You should be better soon, you’re doing really good with your blood work and soon we’ll be able to give you real food,” Law explained. “What would you want to eat first?” Law found himself asking before a long conversation began between the two of them. His heart felt so, so warm, he could feel it beating even behind his eyes when he looked at them.

“Law?” They asked, “Is something wrong?” God, stop looking at me like that, Law pleaded in his head with no avail.

“No, no, you’re all good,” he assured them.

While they were at first making some progress health wise, the results that came in today were worrying Law.

“How are they that low? Why is their body rejecting the medicine now?” Law asked himself as he looked over the scans. This continued on for another three days. More tests, more worrying results and more worrying signs from them. Slurred speech, low energy, it was getting harder for them to breathe too and it was terrifying Law. Their friends were even more worried.

“Tra-guy, what’s happening?” Luffy asked with a small frown, he looked ta his friend through the window that was there and then at the taller doctor.

“I…I don’t know,” Law finally admitted. “I don’t know.” He felt like a massive failure, after all he made a promise to them to make them better. “You guys should go home now, it’s getting late. I’ll call you if I have any updates,” Law said as he looked into the window and sighed. He knew it was a mistake to get this attached to them. He knew it was farther than just being attached, he had fallen for them. Hard. It was late in the night when alarms started to blare near his area.

“Code Blue!” A nurse shouted as she stared to run with a crash cart to an all too familiar room. Law felt his heart drop while he was running, he slowed down and stopped in front of the room.

“Doctor Law! We need your help!” Another nurse shouted as she grabbed his hand and dragged the stunned doctor into the room. Law felt like he was having an out of body experience none of this felt real to him.

“Give me the paddles, now!” Law shouted as he was handed the paddles and quickly got them activated. He placed them on their chest and took in a deep breath, “Clear!” Their chest rose with the shock but their heart was still stagnant. “Charge to one-fifty!” He ordered as he looked at their tired face, God he couldn’t lose them. He couldn’t. “Clear!” Another shock, and then another and another. Soon he had to be pulled back by the nurses to stop with the paddles. “No, no no!” Law shouted as he looked down at them, the person he fell for. The nurses started to clear the room and soon Law was left alone with them.

“I’m sorry… I’m so sorry,” Law whispered out as he looked them over, tears rolling down his cheeks. “I love you…” He finally said through his tears. His hand went to their cold cheek and he gently caressed the smooth skin. The second his skin touched theirs for the first time, sparks shot through him. Under his fingers, their skin began to warm up and soon their heart began to beat once again. Law pulled back in shock as they seemingly come back to life.

“Y-you’re alive?” Law said in disbelief as he watched them gasp for air and cough.

“What happened...?” They asked, Law laughed and quickly moved to hug them close to his chest on the bed as tears continued to stream down his cheeks like a pitiful river.

“I thought I lost you,” Law said as he finally pulled back and gained his composure back. “You can’t get rid of me that easily,” they tiredly teased.

“I don’t want to,” Law said after a minute, they both looked into each other’s eyes and felt the sparks once again.

“I don’t want to either,” They admitted as they leaned in and rested their forehead against Law’s. Law softly smiled and gently ran his fingers through their hair. Law looked into their eyes and slowly leaned in to kiss them. Their lips connecting together felt so natural and raw and law began to feel his heart speed up even after he had broken their kiss.

“I need to run some tests now,” Law said as he gently cupped their cheek in his hand and smiled. “I’ll be back soon, I need to tell the nurses,” He said as he pressed a small kiss on their temple and moved to get some more of the tests run.

“What do you mean they’re cured?” Nami asked in disbelief as she looked at their friend who was standing, walking and acting carefree.

“We don’t know how it happened, but they’re all better now,” One of the doctors said in some disbelief.

“All thanks to Law,” They chuckled as they moved to stand by Nami and smiled.

“Oh! Speaking of him, aren’t you going to grab him so he can come with us?” Nami asked while Luffy nodded his head.

“Yeah! I want Tra-guy to come with us,” Luffy pouted. They laughed at that and smiled, for the first time in weeks, months, they were feeling better. And this was a different kind of better, a cured sort of better. They went over to one of the nurses and smiled at them.

“Is Doctor Law here?” They asked, the nurse looked at them with a bit of an uneasy expression on their face.

“Him? Oh, he left early this morning, I think he has to return back to his other hospital,” the nurse explained. They stood there with a shocked and hurt look on their face. He left? Why did he leave? Why would he want to leave? They silently nodded their head and moved to go back to their friends, but they did their best to smile. Did Law lie to them? Was he just messing with them this entire time?

“He left, but it’s ok. I think it’s time for us to leave too,” They said as they started to lead the way out of the hospital. The group of friends all looked at one another with an unsure look on their face, but they knew better than to question them about it. When they went outside, Franky stood by their nice van with a big smile on his face.

“All ready to hit the road again?” Franky asked, the group all did their best to smile with him. The group of friends looked at their now healed friend and watched as they did their best to smile/

“Yes, I think — “ They were cut off when a tan, warm hand was placed on their shoulder.

“You going to leave without me?” Law whispered to them. They quickly turned over their shoulder and looked at him in shock.

“Law! You’re here! I thought you left,” They said as he pulled Law into a heartfelt hug. Law awkwardly smiled and rubbed their back before he pulled away and gently ruffled their hair.

“I did leave, I left the hospital, I’m taking a small break for now, I need to make sure that you’re doing alright and that nothing will happen to you,” Law explained as a small blush appeared on his cheeks. He moved to used his fuzzy hat to try and hide it, but they stopped him by placing a hand on his cheek. They smiled and gently moved to press a small kiss on his cheek that left the man breathless.

“Come with us, Law,” They said before they looked back at the rest of the group, everyone behind them smiled and seemed to be on board with this idea. Law looked at them all and watched as they all came forward and tried to bring him in closer.

“Yes! A new friend!” Luffy cheered.

“Welcome to our team, Tra-guy,” Sanji smiled as he stubbed out his cigarette on the concrete. They held onto both of Law’s hands and squeezed them with this new found confidence and strength. It was all thanks to Law, they both looked into each other’s eyes and smiled at one another and knew this was the beginning of something special, a new life together. Not only that, but their crew as well, them being so accepting and warm to him made his heart clench in an amazing way, he couldn’t believe it. He couldn’t believe he could be this happy.

“Thanks,” Law smiled as he squeezed their hand, he could get used to these guys. Anything for them.

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gloriafc · 4 years ago

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Baby

Slight greys anatomy mention

You're Eddie's daughter. You were the product of a teen pregnancy, the reason your parents got married. They had Christopher as an attempt to save their marriage and it worked for a little bit. When your mom left you were also graduating high school and ready to go off to college.

"Dad I don't have to go. I can take a year off. You need help with Christopher." "I can handle it mija. You go and become a doctor like you want. Make us proud okay?" And you do just that, the year you graduate med school is the same year he joins the 118. You take a trip to visit them and help them move before your internship starts, Christopher of course is very happy to see you without a screen separating you two and your dad is happy to see how much you've grown.

You start your internship in Seattle, becoming a surgeon at Seattle Grace.

When the fire station finds out about Christopher, no one finds out about you, your dad not knowing how to bring up that he has an adult daughter.

When the incident with the bomb in the or happens, your dad is worried about you resulting in him finally telling the firehouse about you. "Why didn't you ever say anything?" "I don't know. I don't put pictures up, there was never any reason. But now." "Now she's been injured."

They don't get the chance to meet you until the mass shooting, you've been shot twice in your side protecting others. Your dad is your emergency contact and gets the call while he's at work. He freezes as he listens to the doctor talk, "She's alive though right?" Everyone can hear the worry in his voice an immediately question him when he gets off the phone. Bobby immediately gives him time off as he and Christopher head to Seattle to visit you.

It kills Eddie to see you injured, you're his baby girl after all, but you hide your pain well around Christopher. After you get discharged you decide to head back to LA during your time off to heal and to be with your family. So you finally get to meet everyone. Of course Buck quickly becomes the protective uncle you never had, and you're happy to see that your dad has a friend like him.

Halfway through your visit is when your mom comes back, and you don't really know how to feel. You've always bumped heads with her, but it got worse when she'd fight with your dad, even worse when she decided to leave and never made it to any of your graduations. And now you're an adult who watched you're dad build up everything she tore down. She didn't know that you were staying with your dad and tried to hide her reaction when she saw you sitting on the couch with Christopher playing a game of cards.

You tried to keep things civil but you can only do so much on your part. You kept your responses short or hardly spoke unless spoken too, until one night you both finally snapped. There was nothing Eddie could do, he loved you both, but he knew this was something you both needed to work out. "Admit it mom. If you knew I was here you never would've come back, not yet at least." "Y/N-" "No! I bet you don't even know the reason why I'm here. Fuck you couldn't even show up to my graduations. You say you left for yourself but what about your kids? You said dad never made time because of work, but he did. He was there. Me and Christopher forgave him for the things he missed because he made up for it. And you were too busy being pissed that once you got the chance you dipped. You probably don't even know that I went to medical school. That I put in so much effort I graduated early. That I'm a surgeon and one of the ones at the top of my class. And you can't even be proud because I'm a mistake." No one knows how to respond so you continue, "Admit it. You never would've married dad if I wasn't born, if I wasn't a mistake."

You leave the house and as much as Eddie wants to go after you he knows you better than that, better than your mom. He stands in the kitchen doorway as your mom sits at the table with her head in her hands, "She's always been difficult." He can only look at her, "No she hasn't. She's hurt and she has every right to be. She's right she was a mistake, but I wouldn't have it any other way. But what about you? She's here because she was shot twice in a mass shooting protecting others from the shooter, but you didn't know that. You didn't know your daughters a hero. You probably didn't know that she was injured by a bomb either. But I did because I was the first person she called, because I am her father. I made up everything I missed for them because of how much I love them, they both understand that I made a sacrifice to keep us financially stable. They learned love comes with sacrifices from me. You had your reasons to leave and I know that but she's right, you had no reason to leave your kids behind, you could've sent them post cards or something. I had the decency to write letters while I was on yours. I'm so proud of her, of the things she's done. She tried to take a year off of school to help me with Christopher because I had no idea what I was doing, but I figured it out. She lives in Seattle but she still finds time to call and text so Christopher doesn't think he's the reason shes gone. She's sacrificed just as much as everyone else, so if you still think she's a mistake, then what did you think our marriage was? Why did you come back thinking she wouldn't be apart of things like she's not your daughter as well?"

Athena's the one to see you walking the street at night, recognizing you from one of the pictures Christopher showed her. "You're Eddie's daughter right?" "Uh yeah, Y/N." She sits with you, "Athena, Bobby's wife. Why are you out here so late?" You don't know why but you vent to her, "My uh. My mom came back. And we got into a fight." You explain everything to her and she offers her couch to sleep on seeing that you don't want to go home just yet.

In the morning Bobby is the one to drop you off, your dad opening the door when he hears the car in his driveway. You walk passed everyone not wanting to say anything, but your dad follows you to Christopher's room where all your stuff is. "Where'd you go?" "I met Athena she let me sleep on her couch. I already ate, Bobby made breakfast." "Mija-" "Dad I just want to take a shower. I'll probably catch a bus and head somewhere. I'll be back before dinner." He can only sigh as he looks at the floor as you rummage through your bags, "She might be staying." "That's your marriage dad, not mine. You work out what you need to work out. I'm going back to work in a couple days anyways. I'll have to deal with a therapist there. Everything will be fine." He moves and pulls you into his arms sighing as you wrap your arms around his waist and press your face into his chest like you did when you were little, "When did you grow up?" "When I got boobs." You both laugh before he kisses your head and tells you he's heading to work leaving you in a quiet house with your mom in the kitchen.

You quickly shower and head out before your mom can even say anything to you, getting back just as your dad arrives. You end up leaving a note for your dad and leaving in the middle of the night with all your stuff, catching a cab to the airport and catching a early flight back to Seattle. Of course Eddie is upset but he understands that you and your mom will just continue to bump heads and if you think it's what's best for yourself, who is he to argue, you're an adult.

Of course you text and video call all the time, sometimes catching him when he's at the fire station and he's just happy to see you're happy and healthy.

When the plane crash happens he finds it weird that he hasn't talked to you in a few days but brushes things off thinking you're just busy. The day you call, he's at the firehouse with Christopher for a family dinner, he happily answers the phone. "Hey baby! We're having dinner, do you want to talk to Christopher?" His smile quickly faulters when he hears your shaky voice, "Daddy." He quickly walks off after checking that your brother was with Buck, "What happened?" "There. There was an accident. We had a case. We. We had to fly to Idaho. The uh. The plane. The engines were faulty and the plane crashed. My. My right side was, uh. They have to do surgery to repair my right side from my ribs to my knee."

Eddie can feel tears threaten to fall just listening to how scared you are but you continue talking, "They did enough to fix everything but they're sending me to LA for the rest of the cosmetic surgeries and physical therapy while they work out everything with HR. I'm already at the airport with some medical staff, were getting on the plane." Your dad runs a hand down his face as he tries to stay calm, "Uh okay. Call me when you get here. I'll meet you at the airport in a few hours."

Your mom is the one to find your dad outside, "What's going on? Christopher's waiting for you to play the game with him and Buck." "I'm uh I'm going to the airport. Tell him to start the game and I'll play tomorrow." "What happened?" "Y/N was in a plane crash they're flying her here." "I'll go with you." "No. Just stay with Christopher. We don't. We don't need a recap of what happened last time. Not while she's like this. And I need to be alone. Before I see her, with her injuries."

Your dad waits for hours at the airport, the staff tell him where the airplane will land and offer to take him out when the plane lands so he can stay with you. You're out cold when he gets to you, "She started freaking out before the plane took off, which was understandable we sedated her to keep her under for the plane ride, she should be waking up soon."

Your dad sits by your side as you sleep. He counts and recounts all the IVs connected to you, quickly standing when he hears Christopher, "Dad what happened to Y/N?" He looks at your mom and the rest of the firehouse behind them, "What are you guys doing here?" Buck answers, "You left without saying bye. We figured you needed some support, that she needed some support after we heard what happened. She's family too." While everyone is distracted Christopher makes his way to the spot your dad was sitting in and grabs your hand. You're laying on your left side due to your injuries and Christopher can only wonder what happened to you. After a few minutes you open your eyes squeezing the small boys hand in yours, "You're awake Y/N/N." "Hi Christopher."

At the sound of your voice your dad is immediately at your side, "How are you feeling?" Your sarcastic side comes out, letting your dad know you're okay for now, "Like I fell out of a plane."

Of course everyone quickly learns how bad doctors are as patients, "The stitches are wrong." "They should've done this, it's faster." Buck easily jokes with you, "The doctors are probably ready to discharge you and your whining already." "They wouldn't be if they knew how to do their jobs right."

After you get discharged your dad takes you home. Everyone can see you're out of it, so someone is always with you, even your mom, but the conversations stay short but trying for your dad and brother. One day Athena offers to take you out to lunch. "How've you been feeling?" "I don't know." "Your dad's worried about you. Everyone is. You're putting on a brave face." You blink away tears, something that doesn't go unnoticed by Athena, "What's wrong?" You look around thankful you got a corner table and it was a slow day for the restaurant. You take a deep breath before looking at Athena, "I haven't told my dad yet, but a few days before the accident I found out I was pregnant. I'm not anymore... Obviously."

Athena sits with you, talking about the news that is no longer news for anyone, "Are you going to tell your dad?" "I don't know. I think. I think I'm still trying to process everything. The baby. A miscarriage. The crash. The fact that I was only a few seats away from getting crushed to death." Athena nods, "Do you know what's happening with everyone else that was on the plane?" "Uh yeah. The hospital is taking fault for using that airline service with known cases of faulty engines, were basically sueing the hospital for damages up to 15 million each. It'd shut down the hospital, but we all plan on purchasing it." "So you're going to own a hospital." "Part of it along with the others that were on the plane. So I'm not actually pocketing anything right now, but over time."

After a few more days you tell your dad about the miscarriage as you both sit on the porch, "Did you tell the dad?" "No. Uh we were never in a relationship. At least I don't think we were. It only happened once and we were both pretty drunk."

After another month you go back to work to finish off your residency. You apply for fellowships, but know which one you're going to accept. You never tell your dad, opting on surprising him randomly. You show up at the firehouse, your dad running over as soon as Hen points you out, "What are you doing here?" You smile, "I decided which fellowship I'm taking." It takes a second for it to click in his head, "The one here?" You don't get the chance to respond before your dad's picking you up in a bear hug. "Wait until Christopher finds out."

You jump into working, even though you live in your own house now your dad and brother are both excited to have you close again. After a few years, and after your mom's death, things fall into a normalcy. You get invited to any family dinners Bobby and Athena throw and you always find time to spend with your dad and brother.

You manage to become chief of trauma, you still have your board seat in Seattle and occasionally fly out sometimes taking Christopher and your dad for a getaway.

The first time anyone in the firehouse actually sees you in your natural habitat is when they have to bring in a druggie with a gsw. Athena is also there since the patient is the one who had the gun. Buck was grazed by a bullet so the firehouse was still in the ER while he got patched up, as Athena asks you about the patient. "I wouldn't try questioning him yet. He's still whining like a baby." "Can't you give him something for that?" "If I give him morphine I'd have to pump his stomach. And considering he knows the exact name of the morphine I'd have to use. I'm deciding against that. It's one bullet that was at the surface and has been removed. He can suck it up, I'm not gonna be the one to aide in his addiction."

All the beds are in the open with curtains as dividers so everyone can hear the man complaining and pulling against his restraints. The firehouse can hear everything go down when you declare he's ready to leave. "You gotta give me something for the pain." You simply look at him before shaking your head, "I really don't." "You bitch." You push the man back down on the bed making him since since his wound is on his shoulder, "You're the bitch in this situation. The pain you're feeling is from withdrawal from all the drugs in your system you idiot. You want something for the pain fine but that comes with your stomach getting pumped. Do you really want that considering you're over here bitching about a small bullet wound?" The man looks at you before seething, "You don't know the pain I'm in!" "Try me. Your bullet was at the surface and has been removed, the area was numbed with cream so you didn't even feel it. I've been shot twice in a mass shooting both bullets imbedded in muscle. I survived a bomb incident, a plane crash, and a miscarriage while stranded during that plane crash. So tell me I've never felt worse." When the man doesn't say anything you look at Athena, "Get him out of here."

Your dad looks at the spot you were standing, he's never heard the things you've been through ever leave your mouth like that. Bobby sets his hand on his shoulder, "She's tough Eddie. She's fine."

When a natural disaster occurs the hospital sends out surgeons to aid first responders for the people who wouldn't make it to the hospital otherwise, you're one of the few that get sent out due to your trauma certification being more than qualified. The firehouse is lightweight surprised to see you in the field working the tent. "You got sent out?" "You do realize I worked in a trauma one center right? My first year we had a ferry crash." Everyone is amazed with how fast and calmly you work, half of the patients you get wouldn't of survived even getting on an ambulance otherwise.

There is one patient who's stuck under a piece of cement inside a building but is in critical condition. Unfortunately you're the only one small enough to fit through the gap to get to him. "No! She's not going in there!" You can only look at your dad, "We have no choice. We can save him." Reluctantly your dad lets you go knowing you'd go anyways and he doesn't technically have a say in what you can and can't do. They give you your dad's jacket and helmet as a precaution before you slowly slip through the hole. You yell out when you reach the patient allowing the firehouse to continue trying to get the guy out.

You manage to move the patient under a stable piece of metal before suddenly yelling out making everyone stop, "What's going on?" "It's starting to collapse!" Before anyone can respond the building shifts closing the hole they were making. You dad starts freaking out, "We have to get her out of there!" "And we will. Eddie calm down or sit out."

When they finally get to where you and the patient are they can see the patient is stabilized and sort of groggy but they find your body a few feet away. Due to you having your dad's protective gear he wasn't allowed to enter the building but Buck is at your side checking on you, "I got a pulse! She has a leg stuck under some concrete. She probably knocked out after she got stuck." Bobby nods, "Let's get them out of here!"

Your dad watches as Chimney and Hen bring out the man, "Where's Y/N?" Chimney sets the man up on a gurney as Hen talks to your dad, "She moved the man out of the way. She has a pulse but her leg was caught under some concrete." Just as she finishes Buck and Bobby leave the building with you in Bucks arms. Eddie is instantly taking you into his arms as he slowly sets you down on the ground, "Baby wake up." You let out a groan before slowly opening your eyes, "Why are you so loud?" Everyone chuckles, even your dad, at your ability to bounce back so fast even with a broken leg.

Everyone helps you out while your leg heals, Christopher decided to spend the night with you one night and before your dad left he sat with you on the porch. He looks at the cast that everyone has signed and Christopher has drawn multiple pictures on before throwing his arm around your shoulders and pulling you into his chest, "When did you grow up?" "The day you told me go to college to make you proud. Did I?" "You did... You're still not dating until you're 45." You can't help but laugh and shake your head as you both watch the street lights come on and the stars come out. "Aren't you the one that had a kid at 16? The irony." "You're my baby I can be as ironic as I want."

#eddie diaz imagine #911 imagine #911 fox

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babyangellee · 4 years ago

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Critical Condition

AHHH PART 3!

Summary- Upon further assessment, your injuries are a lot worse than expected

Warnings- too much cuteness and angst

Word Count- 1.7k

AN- Please don’t kill me, I know it kind of short but I hope you love it!

[Part 1] [Part 2]

The doctor quietly walked into the waiting room to see the group of agents, all of them were asleep except one. Spencer sat with his head in his hands, getting more anxious as the time ticked by.

"Y/N Y/L/N?" The doctor spoke causing Spencer's head to whip up immediately, quickly tapping JJ who was resting next to him. She jolted awake seeing the doctor, she tapped Emily which started a chain reaction. Soon enough all the agents were wide awake waiting for the doctor to continue.

"Hi, my name is Doctor Feller. Let me start by saying that Y/N is definitely a fighter. When she came in we assessed that she had acute hypothermia, a concussion, and two stab wounds. Upon further examination, we realized that the stab wound to her abdomen was made at an angle and pierced her left lung. We were able to stabilize her long enough for surgery. We did have to restart her heart once but she bounced back right away. She is out of surgery and in the ICU now."

No one knew how to process the doctor's words. They all stood there in shock trying to think of something to say or do. "Can we see her?" Your mother finally spoke up after a moment of silence. "She is still in critical condition but you may see her, I ask only two at a time in the room." Everyone nodded knowing that your mom and Spencer would go in first, there was no question about it.

The doctor led them to your room and opened the door for them. Spencer walked in first, upon seeing you he closed his eyes. You laid there hooked up to machines and IVs. Your normally glowing skin was pale and your lips were blue. Your mom sighed and sat down in one of the chairs by your bed, Spencer following suit sitting on the other side.

Liv reached out and grabbed your hand with hers and brought it up to her mouth to kiss your knuckles. She couldn't stand to see you like this, she had already lost one of her children, she definitely couldn't lose the other. She was horrified when Hotch had informed her that it was Danny that did this to you. Her immediate reaction was to call her sister and scream at her for what her son had done, what pain he had inflicted on the family. Of course, her sister was just as shocked and scared as your mother was, begging to be kept informed of your condition.

Your mom was brought out of her thoughts when she heard Spencer talking. "Liv?" He asked gently. She looked up at him nodding for him to continue what he was going to say. "Can I show you something?" He was quiet and careful with his words, like maybe if he spoke too loud or in a certain tone, something bad would happen. "Of course sweetheart," She responded, matching his tone and volume.

He slowly took the hand that wasn't holding yours and reached into his jacket pocket. He pulled out a small velvet box and handed it to your mom. She gasped reaching out and grabbing it. She let go of your hand to open the box and saw a gorgeous diamond ring inside. "I've been carrying that around for three months, waiting for the right time to ask." He slightly chuckled to himself. He wanted everything about his proposal to be perfect because to him you were the most perfect girl in the world.

"She's going to love it." Liv breathed out examining the beautiful rose gold ring. "I hope so, I had to recruit JJ and Will to help me pick it out. It took us weeks to decide." He explained, remembering them yelling at each other in the middle of a jewelry store while the worker tried to call them down. That was just the first trip, after that, they decided that they needed to bring Will along to play mediator.

After about an hour Spencer and Liv finally stood up and left the room wanting to give everyone else a chance to see you. Emily and JJ went in next, they only stayed for a few minutes, the sight of you being too hard to look at. Then Rossi and Hotch went, leaving Derek and Penelope to go in last.

Seeing you was hard on Derek, you were like a little sister to him and he hated seeing his family hurt. Seeing you tied to that chair in pain was still burned into the inside of his eyelids and all he wanted was to wake up and realize that this was all some sick, twisted nightmare. He'd wake up on the jet to see you and Spencer sitting across from him playing an intense game of chess (that you were of course losing) giggling about some stupid little fact. But it wasn't a dream. This was real life and you were her sitting in front of him in the hospital.

Much like JJ and Emily, Derek and Garcia couldn't stand to see you like that so they made their visit brief. Within 45 minutes, Spencer was back in the room holding your hand, while your mom went to go get some food and coffee for everyone.

"Hey Y/N." He breathed tears forming in his eyes again. "I don't know if you can hear me or not but I hope you can. I love you, and I really need you. I can't do this without you, I don't want to do this without you. So I need you to keep fighting and to wake up and come back to me, come back to all of us. I need you to wake up because Y/N I want more than anything to marry you and grow old with you. So you need to wake up. You need to come back. Please." Spencer couldn't stop the sob that racked his body as he stared at you.

After a while Hotch had told everyone to go home and get some rest, they could visit you tomorrow. Your mom and Spencer had stayed behind, wanting to be the first ones updated if anything happened. It's a good thing that they did because around seven in the morning Doctor Feller came in to do his checkup.

"Good news! Her O2 stats are going up, at this rate we should be able to take her off the ventilator tomorrow and wean her off some of the medication." He smiled writing something down on his clipboard. "What does that mean?" Your mom asked sitting up for her sleeping position on the couch in the room. "That means she's on the path to waking up real soon." With that, he grabbed his clipboard and left. Spencer and Liv released a breath neither realized they were holding.

The next couple of days were painstakingly long for everyone, you weren't getting any better but you weren't getting any worse either. Everyone came by to visit you multiple times and your mom even called your dad. Spencer was originally taken aback by it knowing that your dad was a touchy subject with your mom after he left he still wanted to stay in contact with you and Liam. After Liam died it was weird, Your mom and Dad didn't speak to each other anymore, and you hardly went to see him. After the funeral, you didn't see him again until a year later at your high school graduation. He knew that your parents hadn't spoken in twelve years.

Hotch offered to have an Agent fly out to Pasadena on the jet and get him but he declined. He said he would be on the next flight out and he was. He arrived a day after he got the call.

"You must be Mr. Y/L/N, I'm Spencer." This was a rare exception to Spencer's rule about handshakes. Despite the current situation he wanted to make a good impression on your father. He reached his hand out giving your dad a firm handshake. “Call me Kevin.” While the time passed Spencer got to know your dad and even told him about the ring. Your dad gave his approval and his blessing which meant a lot to Spencer, seeing as they had just met.

Days turned into a week before the doctor finally told them that you were stable enough to be taken off the ventilator. A day later they started taking you off some of the medications and you were scheduled to wake up. "She should be waking up soon, she's going to be a little out of it but she will definitely be happy to see some familiar faces." And with that Doctor Feller walked away urging someone to go in. After much discussion, Spencer decided that he was going to go in alone.

When he walked in he could have sworn his heart melted. You were starting to look better already, your skin wasn't as pale, your lips were back to their normal color, and your chest was rising and falling all on its own. He sat down next to you and grabbed your hand giving it a small squeeze, but what he didn't expect was to feel you squeeze right back as you started to stir and your eyes fluttered open.

"Hi love," Spencer breathed out with a huge grin on his face. You mustered up all your strength and gave a small smile back whispering a hey back. He looked at you before reaching out and brushing a hair out of your face and then reaching down and grabbing your hand again. "Listen there is something I need to say and it really can't wait any longer." He was talking fast which he only did when he was nervous. You just squeezed his hand again and nodded to the best of your ability urging him to continue. He didn't know if this was the right timing or not but this is something he needed to do and he needed to do it now. He just hoped that you liked it because this was a big deal and he needed it to be just right.

"Will you marry me?"

Taglist: @xogiaxo @stxrryspencer @reidloversisforever @chevyimpala00067 @spncersreid @reidsmemory @spencerreidisbootiful @kianagilder-blog @illuxions-x @spencersglasses

#spencer reid #spencer reid x reader #spencer reid x you #spencer reid x y/n #spencer reid x oc #criminal #criminal minds #emily prentiss #jennifer jareau #aaron hotchner #spencer reid x reader angst #derek morgan #spencer reid angst #david rossi #penelope garcia

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mca-attack21 · 5 years ago

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Mystery Bullet Part 3

This is the third and final part to this series, thanks for joining me on the ride! Part 1: Here Part 2: Here

The phone rung a couple of times before Sherlock answered. “Awh John, you’re missing the fun.”

“She’s okay, just had a bad reaction to the antigens in the blood they gave her during surgery.”

“Did they give her the wrong blood?”

“They claim they didn’t, but that is the only thing that makes sense.”

“Oh, that’s brilliant! The bullets weren’t made of ice, they were made of blood. That explains everything.”

“I’m not sure I follow,”

“Think about it the bullet disappeared. She had a bad reaction to antigens. Ice wasn’t dense enough, but the blood would be perfect. Someone used human blood to create a projectile that when froze with liquid nitrogen and shot by pressurized air would resemble a bullet. It wouldn’t leave an exit wound and would dissolve. It also explains why she said the wound site was cold.” Sherlock explained.

“She’s awake now, you should come and see her. She’s asked about you,” John replied.

“I’m glad she is okay, I will come to visit when I have solved the case” Sherlock replied.

“Sherlock, she is still in critical condition, you do understand that right?”

“The auction is tomorrow, we are running out of time,” Sherlock answered before hanging up.

John wanted to call him back, but he knew that it was no use. He instead went into your room and sent Molly home for the night. When you woke up he explained what had happened and Sherlock’s blood bullet theory.

“Have you found the paintings yet?” you asked.

“What do you mean?”

“The real paintings are still in the Museum somewhere. There is too much traffic, extra security, and outside security cameras for them to have been removed. None of the other security cameras were tampered with and no other guards were affected. It had to be an inside job because someone walked in and out of that well-lit room without drawing suspicion and left the same way. They had to be in there well before they actually shot the security guard. Between that and the looping footage, I would assume that the guard was in on the heist and then was double-crossed. Regardless, there is no possible way that the art was removed it is somewhere in that room. I called the art restorator that you met, he said that he would meet with me to check over the paintings. He wanted me to come in that night, but I told him it would have to wait. Oh my god, it was him!” you realized.

“How so?” John asked.

“He knew that I was on to him and he knew you and Sherlock wouldn’t be home. He had access to the facility and no one would question where he was going. He has worked at the gallery for a while and would have had plenty of time to plan everything out.” you explained.

John was laughing and pulling out his phone.

“What?” you asked.

“You are insane, that is what. I need to get normal friends,” he answered.

“Is everything okay?” Sherlock answered.

“Yes, but you need to go to the museum, I’ll meet you there.”

“Why?”

“Because Y/n solved the case and we need to go pick up the paintings and culprit. I’ll explain when we get there. Call Mycroft.” he said and hung up.

“Okay now, you are going to lay here and rest. No exceptions. Sherlock and I will come by when it’s over and we will see what we have to do to get you out of here. Is there anyone you’d like me to call?” he asked.

“Nope, I think I’ll take a nap. Be careful,” you answered.

Sherlock and John went to the museum. It didn’t take them long to discover where the real paintings were being hidden. They then went to Dr. Argonza’s office, to no one’s surprise he wasn’t there. They did find a cryogenic dewar which could have easily been used to store the blood bullets. There was an airbrush and pipe that Sherlock was sure could provide enough velocity to cause the injuries. The entire rig would easily fit under a coat and be hidden. Sherlock filled his brother in and together they came up with a plan to switch the duplicates back with the originals and wait for Dr. Argonza at the auction where they would pick him up.

Convinced that not even Mycroft’s men could screw this up, John and Sherlock prepared to leave. John had them stop by the flat to pick you up some spare clothes for your return trip. He was surprised to see that Sherlock had cleaned up the blood and everything from his experiments earlier that day. He was glad that this was almost over and that things would soon be back to normal.

When they arrived at the hospital they were told visitation hours were over and made some type of excuse using their “badges” to get passed the nurse. John led the way to your room and Sherlock followed. They were surprised to hear talking from your room. That surprised turned to concern when they realized that your door was locked.

Meanwhile:

You were tired and understandably so. But how were you supposed to get any sleep when nurses were constantly coming in and poking and prodding you. This nurse was different, you hadn’t seen him yet. He came over and prepared to inject another medication into your IV.

“I had my last round of medication an hour ago,” you spoke confused.

“This is a post-op Antibiotic, Doctors’ orders,” he said nonchalantly.

“Which one?” you asked painfully forcing yourself to sit up to get a better look.

“Carbenicillin? That can’t be right. I have a severe reaction to Beta Lactums.” you explained.

“Hmm, it doesn’t say that in your chart,” he replied before injecting it in.

You immediately tore out your IV and tried to hit the Nurse call button, shouting for help.

“Shut up! Shut up!” he shouted coming over and placing his hand over your nose and mouth forcefully. You tried to fight against him but your body was too weak and the fear was taking over.

“If you would have just stayed out of it, none of this would have happened. I didn’t want to kill you, but you’re too much of a liability now,” he explained.

You were beyond scared now tears running down your cheeks. You fought against it with everything you had but it was too much. The burning in your chest took over and the black circles grew.

That is when Sherlock and John burst through the door. Sherlock ripped Dr. Argonza off of you and threw him on the ground. You gasped and struggled to breathe. John had him at gunpoint until security was able to collect him. Even then, he waited with him until Mycroft showed up with his men to take him away. Back in your room, the nurses had kicked Sherlock out so they could thoroughly check you over. You were understandably a mess and demanded AMA forms. You gave them no choice and fought through the pain to remove all of the monitors that were hooked up to you. You sat up sheepishly and started putting on the clothes that John had brought. The nurses tried to reason with you, but you weren’t having it. That is when one of them decided to let Sherlock in to see if he could talk any sense into you.

“What is it that you think you are doing?” he asked concerned.

“I’m leaving. Are you going to help me?” you replied clutching your head.

“Y/n, you can’t leave. You need to stay here and let them take care of you, you’re in no condition to go home” he tried and then he saw something that shook him; you started crying.

“I can’t stay here, please don’t make me stay here” you cried.

He felt like he was entirely unequipped to handle this situation and wished that John was there.

“It’s okay Y/n, everything is going to be okay. Just lay back down.” he tried.

“I want to go home Sherlock, I’d rather die there than stay here,” you sobbed.

He went over to your side and did something that was very rare for Sherlock, he gave you a hug.

“I was so scared” you revealed.

“I know, I’m sorry. It’s over now,” he soothed.

“I can’t stay here, Sherlock,” you added.

“I know, we’ll figure it out. Just relax,” he whispered.

“I’m sorry,”

“You have nothing to be sorry for Y/n, just lay back down until John returns,” Sherlock instructed taking a seat next to you. It wasn’t long before you fell back asleep. And shortly after that both John and Mycroft walked in.

“What is all this?” John asked referring to you sleeping in your clothes and not being hooked up to the machines.

“She doesn’t want to stay here. She signed AMA’s and tried to leave.” Sherlock informed.

“Well she doesn’t get a choice, she needs to stay and be looked after,” John replied.

“You know, I have never seen her cry before today.” Sherlock whispered, “She literally said that she rather die at our flat than to stay here.”

“We can’t take care of her in this condition,” John reminded.

“Mycroft, do you think that I can cash in a favor?” Sherlock asked acknowledging his brothers’ presence for the first time.

“You are running low on those, what do you want this time?” Mycroft returned.

“The VIP suite here until Y/n can safely check out,” Sherlock replied still not taking his eyes off of your sleeping form.

“I’ll see what I can do,” he said as he exited the room.

“We almost lost her three times today John,” Sherlock realized.

“She’ll be okay though, and that’s what counts,” John reminded.

The next two days were spent in the VIP suite of the hospital. Sherlock refused to leave your side even though you told him it was okay. The Art Gallery covered the entirety of your medical expenses as compensation for you saving the auction. When you were finally allowed to go home, you were ordered to take it easy for a week. Sherlock refused to take any cases during that time, which was quite out of character. This mystery was one of the few which never made it on the blog, and that was okay.

#sherlock #sherlock holmes #sherlock bbc #sherlock benedict cumberbatch #sherlock imagine #sherlock imagines #sherlock series #sherlock x reader #sherlock x you #sherlock holmes imagine #sherlock holmes imagines #sherlock holmes x reader #sherlock holmes series #john watson #john watson imagine

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angst-king · 4 years ago

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Stuck in this Static void pt 5

((TW: mention of abuse, suicidal behavior, depressed behavior, and violence)) Walking into the ER’s waiting room, she sets him down in a chair. As he’d done in the car, he curls up still shaking but now his fingers are digging into his cold, clammy skin. At the front desk Fuyumi urgently asked. “Can I get some help please?!” There were a small group of nurses who looked to her, about three of them. “What can I help you with ma’am?” One of the youngest nurses at the desk asked in return. “M-My brother he tried to drown himself in the bathtub, he’s bleeding and he’s still got suicidal thoughts.” The nurse furrows her brows. “Did you pull him out?” “n-no he came out himself and told me” Coming out from behind the large desk area, the nurse goes over to Shouto. Stethoscope around her neck which she untangles as she gets down to the boy. “Hi there, what's your name?” She spoke gently as if she were talking to a toddler, Shouto looked at her and quietly replied. “Sh-shouto….T-t-Todoroki” “Alright Shouto, well you can call me Itsuki...now can you sit up a little I need to listen to your chest okay.” Shouto hesitantly sat up which had him coughing, finally a bit more water came up but then he gagged. He’d coughed enough to make himself feel nauseous. Itsuki noticed this and quickly grabbed one of the trash bins nearby and placed it under shouto’s chin. Then she looked at the women at the front desk. “Hey can one of you get a doctor over here like now!” For being so small she could command a room even at 4’8. Her voice boomed with authority which had the other nurses up and paging a doctor.

Her attention was back on Shouto as she heard more liquid come up but it’s not just water. Vomit gushing from his shaking gaping lips, Fuyumi is right next to him rubbing his back. Itsuki couldn’t do much at this time but asked Fuyumi questions. “How old is Shouto?” “he’s gonna be 14 on the other side of the year.” “Does he have any medical conditions, or any diagnosis of anything?” “No nothing he’s physically healthy but...I don’t know about mentally any more.” The way Fuyumi’s last sentence came out made Itsuki frown with sympathy. It was when the vomiting stopped, it had only lasted a minute, but Shouto felt weak on his feet. Moving the trash can Fuyumi sat shouto back down, she could feel his entire body shaking in her hold. The doctor comes over “Alright what’s going on here?” Itsuki looked at the doctor and explained that Shouto had suicidal behavior and thoughts that he’d tried to drown himself. Looking at Fuyumi he asked “and who are you to this young man?” “I’m his older sister” “okay that’s what I thought, let's get him to bed. Jima can you grab a wheelchair?”Itsuki nods to the doctor and hustles off to grab a wheelchair to put shouto in and wheel him off to a bed and give him a proper check.

When the chair is placed beside Shouto, he’s asked if he himself can get in. He nods and stands on shaky feet just barely making it to sit down. He’s wheeled off to one of the beds where the nurse points out the coloration in Shouto’s lips. “I don’t like that blue color in his lips, doctor.” “Alright we’ll see if we can fix that, I wanna see his oxygen levels and vitals in general. He may have coughed up the water but it can still cause side effects to his lungs.” All this talk was making Fuyumi anxious, what was gonna happen to her little brother. Would they focus on the fact that this was a suicide attempt, would they put him on anti depressances? Would they question them about their home life? Is it safe enough to tell them about their father’s horrible behavior? What would they do, could they even do anything about that? All these thoughts began to have Fuyumi shaking. Fear gripping her, chilling her saliva and making her feel as if she were drowning in her own cold abyss of perturbation.

“Ma’am...Ma’am!” She’s pulled from her spiraling thoughts and she sees that they’re in a hospital bay behind the curtain. Shouto’s been lifted onto a bed and the nurse is looking at her concernedly. “O-oh s-sorry, did you need something?”Itsuki sighed in relief before replying. “No you just looked to be spacing out, I never got your name by the way.” Fuyumi blushes at the kind woman and she says to her. “Oh sorry, my name is Fuyumi Todoroki.” Then the doctor speaks. “His breathing is better than I’d thought it’d be, which is great, though Itsuki these lacerations are a bit deep, the bleeding has stopped but these need suturing. Could you grab the suture kit please while I check to see if shouto has any mobility?” Itsuki nods at her doctor’s request, going to fetch the suture kit leaving Fuyumi and Shouto with the doctor. “Shouto I have a question for you.” He states while he places IV lines into shouto’s other arm. Looking up at him acknowledging the man and giving him his full attention. “Shouto are you still feeling suicidal? If so can you explain why?”

Shouto frowned, he had to think before answering and he still stammered through his words. “Y-yeah I-I do. I-I um….”He then looks at Fuyumi and she recognizes this look, she knows that Shouto is scared to tell people and keeps those things a secret. She gave him a nod so he continued. “I have a-a rough h-home life. F-father b-beats and sc-screams at me….T-tonight he t-told me to d-die.” The doctor looked horrified, Fuyumi confirms this. “He’s always hurting Shouto, gas lights him into a depressive and suicidal condition. He’s hit him so hard he threw up to the point of being dehydrated. He wants Shouto to be his business successor and wants him to be perfectly like him.” The doctor couldn’t help but give a sad look to them.

“How long has this been going on?” “the feelings or what our father does?” “your father’s behavior.” Fuyumi answered this one “It started even before Shouto was born, he tried it with one of our late siblings...his name is Touya, he died sometime ago.” “Alright” The nurse returns with the suture kit, grabbing a syringe and filling it with a numbing agent. “Alright Shouto we’re gonna numb your arm up a bit okay then we’ll get started” The doctor warns before sticking the needle into Shouto’s arm, he didn’t wince as if he couldn’t feel it. Shouto felt numb physically and emotionally. Fuyumi was a little saddened by her little brother’s lack of reaction.

Shouto’s arm was bandaged up in no time and the doctor told them that he’d like for Shouto to stay here for a little while. Fuyumi was old enough to admit her sibling through the paperwork so they didn’t have to call Enji which was a big relief. Now came the part Fuyumi dreaded, the doctor came over to her quietly while Shouto was resting, they’d put him on a nebulizer to treat any potential lung infections. She’d been lulled into tired silence by the machine until she was approached by the doctor. “Hello Fuyumi, I need to talk to you about something.” He says, alerting the girl who’s eyes darted towards him. She sits up fully from her slouched position in the guest chair. “Yes, what is it?” “I think Shouto needs to be admitted into a psychiatric unit. You’ve said he’d been gas lit several times into such thoughts and behaviors, sure medication could work but. His home is not a safe environment for him to try medications.” Fuyumi sighed “not again” she muttered as she’d remembered her mother being admitted to a psychiatric hospital due to Enji’s behavior towards her. Shuddering at the memory she’s interrupted by the curious doctor who hears her. “Again?” He repeats making Fuyumi blush from knowing he’d heard her. She had to tell him, so she did, not in the most vivid detail but answered him with an explanation. Explaining that Rei had been admitted to a psych ward when Shouto was younger because she’d had a mental breakdown from Enji’s abuse and poured scalding water on Shouto’s eye.

The doctor seemed to understand and knew of the concerns yet he held patience and replied back. “Well he’s gonna need to take a few tests and that will decide on whether he needs to be admitted so it's not definite but. It's a better option.” “So when will the test be done?” “Well it can be as soon as tomorrow, or sometime during the week or so.” Fuyumi looks down into her lap with a small nod of acknowledgement of the reality she’d be facing. Her little brother potentially being placed in a psychiatric ward. It worried her yet, she also knew that he’d be away from their abusive father.

This would give her time to try and figure out living situations. Shouto didn’t have any friends and lacked good social skills due to his upbringing. So he couldn’t stay with someone for the time being even if he weren’t to be admitted to a mental hospital. Still she didn’t know if she could support shouto, or if she could even get him away from Enji permanently. She’d need adult help and most likely a lawyer but. Fear came in, what if Enji had the power to bribe those deterring them from helping Fuyumi setting her back further to keep shouto under his rule. She needed to figure out something. It didn't matter if Shouto would be admitted or not, she had to do something for her little brother. “I’ll leave you to rest, miss, you seem to be tired and it's almost 3 am and you’ve had a long night.” The doctor says politely bowing and giving Fuyumi the time to thank him before he leaves.

The next day, Shouto didn’t wake up till sometime in the afternoon and boy did he hurt. His body was aching, and he still had a slight cough yet he couldn’t care any less. He just curled up wanting to go back to sleep but right as he was about to shut his eyes to block the bright light of the hospital and the sunshine. The doctor knocks on the door, not only startling shouto and making him grumble but. Waking up Fuyumi who had fallen asleep in the small chair. Letting himself in the doctor smiles seeing his patient and sibling are awake. “Hello there Shouto, nice to see you’re awake. I’m gonna check your vitals, then we’ll talk about the important stuff.” Shouto just sighed with a dull tired look on his face. His breathing and oxygen are checked, his heart was great, everything was great except for the fatigue and emotional numbness.

Putting his stethoscope back around his neck, the doctor took a seat in the spare seat opposite Fuyumi. “Alright Shouto, lets talk.” Nodding the doctor started his talk. “You’re going to be psychologically tested to see how we can treat this. Whether you just need medication or you need to be admitted to a psych ward, you need to be honest while answering okay.” Shouto nods remaining silent, “You’ll be taking a test or two soon, a nurse will come in and will help you if need be but all answers will be on you.” When the doctor had finished, Shouto then asked. “Can I go back to sleep now?” Huffing the doctor shakes his head. “Sorry kiddo, you have to eat something. Can’t let you starve yourself.” Shouto frowns as the doctor gets up but he knows that it's for his own good.

Eating was a challenge, he didn’t have the motivation or strength, or even the appetite, but. He tried and got some of it down by the time the nurse came in the tests and a pencil. The test wasn’t long and took no time yet it was still a draining process, then adding them having to take blood from him afterwards he really wanted to sleep now. Some of the questions stayed on his mind and whether he answered correctly or not. ‘Are you still considering suicide?’ Well Shouto hated living, sure he wanted to be happy for once in his lap but, he felt that he could only be happy if he were dead. ‘Do you starve yourself?’ Well he didn’t starve himself more like the rigorous beatings made him sick enough to not want to eat. Or he didn’t have the motivation to feed himself. ‘Do you cut?’ Yes he does, he had for a while now and it was his only way of feeling something, it let him cry which meant expressing emotions that felt forbidden when he wasn’t cutting. Then one last question rang through his head ‘Would you like to get help?’ Well that would depend, would his father have to consent to this? Could he willingly get help himself? Would he get away from Enji? He didn’t like feeling suicidal, or feeling empty inside, he wanted to feel normal but he never got to feel that so. How could he tell what normal was? Maybe they’d help him figure that out? Would they shove pills down his throat? Would the strap him down to a bed or put him in a straight jacket or even a padded room? Were those types of places real or were those just movie’s over dramatic depictions of a psych ward?

These thoughts surprisingly put Shouto to sleep, or those were the drugs.

Meanwhile Fuyumi was with Natsuo, she’d stopped by to tell him what happened and maybe get some advice? “So let me get this straight, father gaslights Shouto to the point of him trying to commit suicide, he stopped himself and asked for you to take him to the hospital. They’re saying that his best option would be to be admitted to a psychiatric facility so we can figure out how to get him away from father?” Natsuo reiterated taking in the information. Fuyumi nods “I-I just I don’t know if it really is a good idea, and I don’t know if either of us could financially support shouto on our own. We’re adults but we’re not as stable as our father is and most adults but. I think him going to the ward will give us some time to figure something out.”

Natsuo rubs his temples, “I couldn’t agree more, I mean we’re both in school and so is shouto, not that it would be the worst thing to try and take him but. It's sudden and we need time.” he hated to hear about what happened to Shouto, it reminded him of their mother but this time he didn’t want things to get any worse with Shouto and. From how much better their mother has been doing, they both knew the doctor’s suggestion would be the best option for their little brother. “I’ll come with you next time to see shouto, when are you going back?” Fuyumi thought for a moment before answering. “Most likely tonight” “Okay then call me and I’ll meet you there.” With that promise Fuyumi grabbed her bag and slipped on her shoes but right before she left Natsuo called out. “Hey, I love you and...good luck with him okay” Fuyumi gave a small smile to her brother “I love you too” She waved him goodbye and left the dorm complex.

Time went by and Fuyumi found herself calling Natsuo to tell him it was time to meet up at the hospital. She soon stood in the parking lot, the street lights were turning on as the sun was setting. She smiles a little as she sees Natsuo walking towards her after hopping off of the bus. “Hey there, you ready?” He asked, Fuyumi nods “yeah, let's go in.” she says and leads him inside, she strolls towards the elevator till they’ve reached the ICU. She follows the placards till she reaches Shouto’s room. Knocking softly there isn’t an answer but she opens the door anyway.

Opening the door, Shouto is laying in bed, he’d seemed to have eaten a small dinner not long before the siblings had arrived. “Shouto?” Fuyumi’s voice calls out softly, heterochromic eyes flutter open with slight bags underneath them. Despite him resting most of the time, his eyes still held a tired look to them. “Hm?” He hummed quietly, walking further into the room Natsuo announced his presence. “Hello Shouto” Recognizing his voice, Shouto looked at them both seeing Natsuo he frowned. “Y-you dragged Nats into this Fuyumi?” Fuyumi knew what he meant but shook her head. “No Shouto, I didn’t drag him. I needed him to know so he could help us, help me, and help you.” Natsuo came over to his youngest sibling’s bedside, then brought him into a hug. Shouto tensed and flinched in Natsuo’s hold until he spoke. “Shh, I’m sorry about him and what he’d made you do and how you’ve been feeling...I’m here because I want to be able to help you get better. I know you may not want to go to the psych ward but. We’ve talked it over and it's the best option for you.” Shouto nods his head “I-I know it is….I thought about it actually” Natsuo stands up letting him go so as to not squeeze the life out of him. Both the older ones seemed curious and asked for Shouto to elaborate. So he shared his thoughts, he knew he’d be better off in a hospital, he’d get away from his father and he hated these feelings even when he indulged himself in them.

Shouto’s explanation pleased them, it made them happy that Shouto wanted to get better and was willing to do it. During this conversation the doctor came in as did another person. A woman who was sharply dressed like the man next to her. “Hello guys ah, another family member. Are you his brother?” Natsuo faces the man and shakes hands with him as he introduces himself. “Yes I’m Todoroki Natsuo” “nice to meet you, I have another person for you all to meet.” He gestures to the woman who’s holding a clipboard of paper and a pen in her chest pocket. She smiles sweetly to them all “hello I’m doctor Fumiya, I’m a pediatric psychologist.” She looked down to her patient in the hospital bed and approached him. “You must be Todoroki Shouto, yes?” The half and half colored male nods “Well I’m here to go over your test results with you and your siblings.” With a nod of approval the woman starts.

“You seem to obviously have depression but this seems to be chronic, seeing as you’ve stated that you’ve been having these feelings for so long. You do have anxiety which is traumatic induced. You don’t exactly have an eating disorder, it's more of the depression and anxiety making it hard and I’m going to guess that you’ve been beaten to the point of vomiting?” Hearing Dr Fumiya’s prediction, Shouto had to sadly confirm it. “Okay and with all of those things in consideration you’ve also stated that you’ve still considered suicide…. But you said you’re willing to get help. Is that still true?” “Still having thoughts of suicide or willing to get help?” “both.” “Yes to both of them” "Now how willing would you be to be admitted to a psych ward?"

Shouto shrugged, his tone held exhaustion but also a small hint of desperation which could faintly be detected when he said "I'm just so tired of this life, and if I could be helped then I'll try it I guess." With that Dr Fumiya wrote down some things before replying. “That’s good, first we’re going to admit you to a ward where you will be given medications and such to try to see what will work for you. You will have a doctor who you will talk to as well as a therapist but it won't be everyday seeing as they obviously have other patients. You will also have group therapy and other types of ways to develop better coping mechanisms and life skills.”

With this information Natsuo asked “Now from what I’ve heard about psych wards, there are certain things Shouto can’t take with him right?” “yes most of the rules apply to just about all psychwards. Though certain things can be gained or permitted if he’s under super vision. Like. He can’t have drawn strings in his clothes or have shoe laces. No razor shavers, no staples, anything that he could hurt himself with. He also can’t take his phone in with him and he may have 1-1 supervision, so someone may come in and check on him or be with him outside the door while he’s showering or in the bathroom. His door will never be locked and will most likely be open through the day time and unlocked during the night time.” She continued to explain more things and general rules most psychwards have.

It was a little overwhelming but what did they expect? They were young adults who were admitting their abused, depressed and suicidal little brother to a mental health hospital. “So when will he be going and where?” “Well there’s one not too far from here and he can go as soon as tomorrow afternoon actually or as soon as the doctor is willing to release you here. Though his release date from the psych ward will be unknown for a while it depends on how cooperative you are, how well you’re handling things and as well as if it's safe for you to go back considering your living situations.” “O-oh so it all has its determining factors? How much should I pack for him?” Questioned Fuyumi “I’d say pack two weeks worth of clothes, they all have laundry days and schedules so he’ll be able to wash his clothes.” “Oh that's great” Natsuo joined, then Fuyumi’s phone rang, she looked to see who it was before frowning. It was Enji.

“What is it sis?” Asked Natsuo, he leaned over and saw who was calling and paled. “Shit, I take it you didn’t tell him?” “Right, and I don’t know what to tell him.” Then Dr Fumiya suggested, “let me talk to him, I’ll see what I can do.” hesitantly Fuyumi hands the woman her phone, she soon leaves the room. Sitting anxiously, Shouto's room is silently waiting for the psychologist to come back. They’re watching the door which soon opens after a minute and she hands the phone back to the eldest todoroki in the room. “He will be here soon, so doctor I suggest you alert security right away to keep an eye out for him.” The doctor nods and leaves the room after confirming Enji’s name, Fuyumi twiddled his thumbs a little thinking about what she was gonna do. She still lived with her father but that was to keep shouto as safe as she could. “Hey, you can probably live in one of the safety lots for people who escape abusive partners or family.” Suggested the psychologist, fuyumi listened with a quizzical look on her face. “You just explain your situation to them and they’ll let you stay. Though if you feel scared going to pack you and your brother’s bags you could always ask them to have an officer or two escort you to protect you.” With this option displayed to her, Fuyumi knew it would be safer for her to live in a safe home and be escorted by officers than try and go alone. “Alright thank you Dr Fumiya” Shouto then spoke up “Fuyumi….I-I don’t want him to c-come here” everyone could hear the anxiety in his voice and then they saw him. Shouto was shaking like the previous night he’d come into Fuyumi’s room.

Eyes melting with sympathy and warmth for the teen who’s eyes welled with tears and fear. “Oh shouto sweetie” She cooed gently standing up, she goes over to him and pulls him so he’s facing into her midsection, Fuyumi is gently rubbing his back as he cries. “Shhh we’re not gonna let him near you, I promise.” Shouto’s still trembling body relaxes a little, still his hands lightly grip her sweatshirt he sobs. Natsuo added himself to the group and came to comfort his little brother, gently running his fingers through his hair. “We promise you shouto, you’re gonna be safe.”

It took a minute for the teen to calm down enough to let go of his older siblings just in time the doctor came back. “Alright I’d told them about your father, and if he somehow gets in, don't hesitate to hit the emergency call button that’s on the side of shouto’s bed and on the wall next to the door” Advised the doctor who smiles at the sigh of relief of the small family. “See shouto we’re safe, the doctor has taken precaution and knows not to let him in.” Shouto just started to play with his fingers as a way to distract himself. “Well guys if you’ll excuse me I will be taking my leave to check on other patients, have a nice night.” “Thank you so much Dr Fumiya” Just as she leaves the nurse comes in to take Shouto’s blood, which Shouto willingly gives. Not like he has much of a choice though.

Fuyumi had been there for a while and hadn’t eaten much so she’d gotten out of her chair to get something to eat. “Hey boys I’m gonna get something from the vending machine, you guys want anything?” “hm could you see if they have any instant ramen?” Fuyumi giggles at Natsuo’s request but she nods “Will do lil bro, you want anything Shou?” “u-um c-can I have milk please...strawberry?” “sure thing, I’ll be back.” She leaves the room and searches for the vending machines around the hall.

It wasn’t a long walk to find some vending machines in a small room, she found the instant ramen one and got Natsuo the spicy ramen he liked, she got herself the shrimp ramen. Next, getting a carton of milk, it took some figuring out since it ate her dollar but as she waited for her milk to be dispensed she heard a loud scream from down the hall. It made her jump but she still kept a hold on her food.

Then a crash came and she had a horrible feeling that made her run to see what was going on. ‘What’s going on, where is it coming from’ the white haired woman thought then she saw it. The door to Shouto’s room was open and one nurse was shaking on the floor while the other was protecting shouto. And right in the center of it all was him, Todoroki Enji. The red head was yelling and trying to get to shouto with force but the small woman who Fuyumi could tell was Itsuki from the night before. She wasn’t backing down, her stance was defensive but ready to throw a punch at any moment. Eyes widened as she watched Itsuki, she then noticed why her stance was defensive, she was holding a needle full of something in her back hand as she warned Enji. “Look Mr Todoroki either calm down or I won't hesitate to inject you with this!” She says in a serious but calm manor, Enji on the other hand growled at her with a sneer on his face, “Oh and was it, probably just saline, not enough to put me out even if it was a sedative.” He shoved her but, her stance allowed for her to easily maintain her balance, “Leave now sir.” Her voice is low “Why the hell should I, you’ve got my stupid son here? I want him back!” “you’re a threat to his safety and you’re abusive to those around you. I won't let you take him” Itsuki doesn’t notice Fuyumi but seeing the other nurse who had some sort of head injury Fuyumi quickly dropped her food and ran with adrenaline down to get more staff members and hopeful security.

She didn’t want to leave Itsuki to be the only barrier between Enji and Shouto but. What else could Fuyumi do! She can hear more of Enji’s yelling, more things crashing and clattering to the cold chemical tile floor. She flinches even as she’s doors and doors down. Getting to the front desk she frantically yells “please help! One of your nurses is injured and my father somehow got up here and he shouldn’t be. Please the only one protecting my brother is a nurse!” Crash! Then another scream but this sounded lower in pitch. “Shouto!” Fuyumi cried and almost ran back but grabbed someone who held her as staff members arose and went to help. It is the doctor looking after Shouto. “Hey hey he’s gonna be okay, Itsuki can take care of this I promise.” Fear paralyzed her into remaining still the doctor lets her go and it isn’t long before security shows up rushing past them to deal with the situation.

Natsuo came down the hall and security came down not long after them. He sees Fuyumi’s worried look, and becomes concerned. “Hey Fuyumi what’s going on? You okay, why aren’t you with shouto?” Fuyumi explained what had happened and as she spoke she began to shake a little. Tears raining down as she’d remembered her promise to shouto. “W-we broke our pro-promise Nats.” At first Natsuo couldn’t remember but one look of seeing Enji being dragged away in restraints by security frowned and hugged her. “I know Fuyu, I’m sorry, he won't be mad at us though. Knowing Shouto he’ll be scared but not mad, if we can get to him now he should be okay.” “o-okay, let's see if we can go th-then.” She says as Natsuo holds onto her hand protectively after letting her out of his loving hold.

Hurrying down the hall they get to shouto’s room which is a mess with shattered medical supplies and Itsuki is right there calming a disquieted Shouto who was pale, otherwise unharmed thankfully. Sighing in relief Fuyumi came over and bowed to the nurse with lots of admiration and vederanation. “Thank you so much Ms Itsuki, I’m sorry you had to deal with our father though.” Huffing a little, the small nurse shrugged her shoulders. “I did what I had to do, but it's okay, it's not your fault that man is so horrible he doesn’t deserve to be called a father.” Fuyumi then looked at Shouto “I’m sorry he tried to get to you Shouto, are you okay?” Talking through shaking lips Shouto replies “H-he didn’t hurt me...ju-just sc-scared.” Fuyumi smiles a little, kissing his forehead gently. “I’m also S=sorry I dropped your food running to get help.” Shouto and Natsuo rolled their eyes “hey don’t apologize, it was the sleeze bag’s fault. I’ll go get it this time, you stay with Shou okay.” Natsuo offered with a small chuckle before looking at Itsuki who went back to checking Shouto over. “Ms Itsuki, would you like me to get you anything...kinda a way of thanking you for protecting our little brother.” Itsuki peers over at the tall white haired teen who’s giving her a genuine smile. “Dear I’m just glad you all are safe, that is enough thanks for me..” Her voice trails a little as she focuses her mind once more. Natsuo just nods, he heads to the vending machine area and gets the milk, ramen, and a bottle of water for Itsuki. Even if she hadn’t asked for anything, he couldn’t not repay her back.

When everyone was given their respective things. Sitting down they had time to each other again in silence. At this point silence meant peace no heart ache but silence also meant suffering and they knew that Shouto would be going to the psych ward soon. Hoping to rid of his suffering whether for good or temporarily enough to find time to find even better help in a healthier. All they could do was try.

#my psych academia #bnha fanfiction #bnha psychward tododeku #depressed todoroki #suicidal todoroki shouto

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thran-duils · 5 years ago

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Devils Look Like Angels (Ch. 4)

Title: Devils Look Like Angels (Chapter 4) Summary: Fem!Reader x Psychotic!Castiel. An unhinged, criminal, supernatural artifact collector extraordinaire… and the reader caught his eye. It will not take her long to realize that beneath the charm and mystique is a crazed killer who will go to great lengths to woo her. Words: 2,139 Warnings (for the fic in entirety): Stalking, angst, death/murder, violence

Author’s Note: I have reset my tag list. If you want to be added back, please DM or send me an ask!

Chap 3 || Chap 5 || Masterpost || Fanfic masterpost

“What the actual fuck?” Dean demanded, gripping the steering wheel furiously.

The three of you had been quiet after getting the people safely home. You were all trying to process what had happened. As soon as you had gotten back to the car and sat inside without the car on, no one moving, the floodgate opened.

In a fluid motion, he turned, throwing his arm over the back of the seat in order to see Sam in the passenger side and you in the back. Mostly to see you. Sam looked at you as well.

Defensively, you threw your hands up in defeat at their piercing stares. “I don’t know!”

“He sure as hell seems to have taken a liking to you,” Dean retorted.

“What are you accusing me of?”

“I’m not accusing you of anything, Y/N.”

Sam cut in, “I think the question is, what is his deal? What does he want?”

“Apparently a fan of Y/N,” Dean responded. “And killing innocent people for entertainment!”

“How did he even know we would come? This is far from Vermont,” Sam asked.

Closing your eyes in frustration, you leaned your head back on the seat with a sigh. Of course it was too good to be true that a normal, well spoken man would have interest in you. Why had you not been more concerned when you met him at the café? There were red lights all over the place, the biggest one being that he happened to be in Lawrence of all the cities he could choose in the country and happened to be at that café at that exact moment.

“What?” Dean asked after a pause. “What are you thinking about?”

Seems you would need to divulge that you had had contact.

Opening your eyes again, you leveled them with a stare. “We are pretty close to home. Only a few hours away.”

Sam and Dean exchanged a look, Sam venturing, “And? And how would he know that?”

Adjusting uncomfortably under their scrutinizing gaze, you cleared your throat. “He, uh…” you paused, the words getting stuck in your throat as the guilt crept in. How could you have been so relaxed about that meeting? “I ran into him at the coffee shop on the corner of Crescent and Fifth.”

“What? When?” Sam asked, genuine concern lacing his tone.

You shrugged, “A couple weeks ago at most. It was when I brought home lunch from Sopranos. We just bumped into each other – almost collided, really. He recognized me, apologized for almost running me over, and bought me something to eat.

The words were rolling out of you now.

“We ate, had some small talk, where he told me he was a journey salesman which is why he was in Lawrence –”

“And you believed that?” Dean interjected. “Y/N… Jesus. He followed you from freaking Vermont back to Kansas!”

“I’m quite aware. It is painfully obvious now. But he admitted to me that he procures and sells supernatural artifacts. Which is why he hadn’t been as surprised about the banshee as a normal person should or would be. And he is not looking for something in Lawrence. My first thought when he mentioned artifacts was the bunker; if he was trying to use us to find it. But he didn’t seem to know. He was talking about Topeka, Ottawa… and somewhere else.”

“Anyway, Lawrence is central to all three of the places. And when eh explained it like that, it made enough sense. Then, Sam called shortly after. I excused myself, we exchanged numbers –”

“He has your phone number?” Sam interrupted.

You admitted, blushing, “Yes.”

“Jesus,” Dean swore again.

“Well, at that moment, I didn’t know he was off his rocker!”

“That’s putting it lightly,” Dean quipped.

“Alright,” Sam cut in or tried to because Dean pressed on.

“No, not alright. You know what?” He reached his arm toward you. “Give me your phone if you have his number.” You shook your head immediately and he rose his brows. “You don’t have his number?”

“I do.”

“Then why can’t I call it?”

“Do we really want to be antagonizing this guy, Dean?” Sam asked, staring Dean down. Dean tried to argue but Sam held his ground. “It’s not smart. Now, if he doesn’t seem to know about the bunker – and even if he did, he can’t get in – that seems to be all the more reason to not reach out to him. If you do, that could give him the wrong idea.”

“The asshole already has the wrong idea!”

“How do we not now he won’t follow us home?” you asked. “I mean, it’s dark. We won’t be able to identify what a car looks like behind us if one starts trailing us.”

Dean exhaled annoyed at the thought of that.

Sam suggested, “Let’s get a hotel then. Not towards Lawrence, let’s go further out. And we can take turns keeping watch. If Dean drives, I’ll sleep until we get there and then he can rest while I stay up. And then Y/N can get up to relieve me.”

Shaking his head, Dean muttered, “I don’t like this.”

“We don’t really have a choice given our situation.”

Silence filled the space, Sam’s words sinking in. What he suggested was smart and would ensure the group of you would feel more safe than potentially leading Castiel back to the bunker.

Suddenly Dean turned back around to face the steering wheel and threw the key in the ignition. “Fine. But anymore contact and I’m calling the bastard. Antagonistic or not.”

<> <> <>

Groggy, it was almost impossible to open your eyes. The room was a blur; bright but blurry. You did not believe you were at home, it did not feel like home. Your eyelids were so heavy, your body felt like cement. Why were you so tired?

There were voices, hovering around you. You could not make out the majority of what was being said, only catching words like ‘blood’, ‘damage’.

Darkness crept in again, flooding from the outside in. You did not hear anything anymore.

<> <> <>

When you came to next, your vision was still unfocused. Your body felt heavy still, weighted down by…

You focused on the IV drip as it came into focus, hooked up into your right arm. Weighted down by medicine.

A voice drew your attention to your left. Mustering much more effort than it should require, you turned your head to the source.

Through your haze of sleep and medication, you still startled at seeing Castiel sitting there by your bed. He was staring at you with concern, leaning forward towards you, his large hand resting on yours.

You tried to jerk away from him but your moment was sluggish, although you were becoming alert much more quickly at this turn of events. Where were you? Why was he here? Where were Sam and Dean?

This had to be a dream. Why else would he be here? Next to your bed? But this was not your bed. Where were you? You thought again frantically. It looked like a hospital room. You racked your brain, trying to remember.

“Y/N,” Castiel tried again, drawing you from your frightened thoughts. “How are you feeling? It looks like the doctors got you stitched up alright and have your pain controlled.”

Stitched?

It came back.

You were in West Virginia or at least you had been. The Wendigo. It had gotten you cornered and slashed your thigh. You did not remember much after that besides Sam and Dean carrying you to the Impala.

“Y/N?”

“What… what are you doing here?”

“I do not know if that –”

“What,” you repeated with more force, trying to scoot away. “Are you doing here?”

You quickly took note that the door was closed. You had to have a call button to ring for help.

Castiel tsked you, ‘Now, now. Do not go getting yourself worked up. You have been through enough and you need to rest with minimal – preferably no – stress. I am not here to hurt you.”

“I don’t know that!”

“You are just going to have to trust me.”

“How can I? You killed innocent people to lure me in for a ‘game’.”

Holding up a finger, Castiel corrected, “To be fair, I did not kill the people that lured you in. That was my friend.” He paused and added, “I did kill two people as a safety net, yes. I new you were not going to fail and I did not want my friend losing his temper if he was not given the two more hearts as promised. I killed those two people for your safety. I will kill for you. But, then again, I do like killing.”

“You are not helping your case,” you told him coolly.

You had found the call button remote underneath the blanket. Your fingers closed in around it.

Lips tight, Castiel leaned away from you in order to reach your bed side table. He picked up a cup and held it out to you. You saw it was ice chips but refrained from accepting the offer.

Shoulders slumping ever so, Castiel sighed. Lowering his arm, he placed the cup back on the beside table, ‘I suppose I am just going to have to earn your trust.” The call button was not responding, your anxiety beginning to rise. “Y/N, as I have expressed, I am enamored with you. The light in your eyes, your quick wit. You also have a very lovely smile which is an extra bonus in the package for me.”

“I would love for you to join me. I think my experience and yours as well, we would make a formidable team. Now, I understand we do not want to be making any rash decisions. I am open to giving you time to consider, I really would like it to be a sound decision. It is always so much more practical when we come to the table together, both willing.”

“I would be disappointed if you turned me down. But I think if you take the time to really consider it, you will see how magnificent this agreement would be for both of us. Freedom to travel and discover riches and have adventure. Together.”

Leaning forward again, he told you, “So, really, kitten, hurting you is the furthest thing from my mind.”

He went quiet, gauging your reaction.

You had to say something.

“Thank you for considering that time is needed.”

He smiled, pleased at your appreciation. “Of course, of course. I do not want to rush a good thing. You deserve time.”

Looking to the door, he sighed, “Now, I suspect those two brutes you have around will be coming back. That blonde one, Dean, can put food away but even his stomach must have its limits. I should make myself scarce.” Standing from the chair, his hand brushed yours. “I am glad I stopped by to check in on you, kitten. I am relieved you are doing alright.”

He made it halfway to the door before turning back to you. His gaze fell to your concealed hand holding the call remote. “by the way, I would ask them to plug that back in for you. I do apologize but I needed some uninterrupted time with you to share my admiration. Please forgive me. I will be in touch.”

With that, he swung the door open and strolled out.

Your eyes were glued to the doorway, afraid he would return. He swore he did not want to hurt you but… unease still crept. If anything, it sounded like he was developing an unhealthy attraction.

Sam and Dean’s voices reached you before you saw them. You pushed yourself up to a sitting position in anticipation.

As soon as they walked in, they saw the fear in your expression.

“What’s wrong?” Sam asked alarmed.

“Castiel,” you said hoarsely.

“What?” Sam demanded. “Here?”

You nodded and Dean’s face set in stone before he made a beeline for the hall, searching.

“Dean, he’s gone. It’s been a few since he left,” you called after him, leaning forward in the bed. You winced at the tug on your stitches.

He came back into the room and you recalled the last ten minutes, stumbling through what he had said. When you got done, Sam meant to sit in the chairs next to your bed but stopped suddenly. He picked up a small box that was adorned with a lace bow. His jaw set when he read the tab.

“It’s for you.”

You opened it warily. Inside was a diamond bracelet. Balking at it, you held it up and whispered, “Is… is this real? This must be worth a fortune.”

Dean snapped, “Are we all still against calling this asshole and setting things straight?”

~~~

CASTIEL FOREVER TAGS: @willowing-love @perseusandmedusa @greenappleeyes @afanofmanystuffs @earthtokace @shikaros-blog @marisayouass

#castiel fic #castiel x reader #spn fanfic #au spn fanfic #au castiel #psycho!cas #my shit

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gamingleopard28 · 4 years ago

Text

RWBY Shattered Eye AU

(If you would like to make the AU into a comic I don’t mind, just give me the credit for the AU)

Volume 5 School Fight

After Cinder knocked Jaune to the floor she starts walking over to kill Weiss, but then notices an unconscious Ruby to her right then saying “Eye for an eye”. She then lifts Ruby up with her right arm by the shoulder with her spear in her left hand. Jaune yells out a “NO!” but Cinder doesn’t care. She slowly shoves the spear into Ruby’s right eye in order to make it as painful as possible. Yang cries out a “NO!” just before running to Cinder and tackling her which caused her to drop Ruby pretty hard onto the floor. During the moment of confusion Weiss, Qrow, Jaune go to keep Ruby alive while Nora, Ren and Ozpin/Oscar keep them protected from Mercury, Emerald and Hazel who are still trying to fight them. Meanwhile Yang is aggressively smashing Cinders head into the floor to a point where to fix it would require a landscaper as well. After Qrow realizes Ruby should be fine he goes over to Yang who is still pummeling Cinders face and manages to pull her off so he can check on her. Yang's face is filled with tears that are boiling as they fall, her hair is ready to basically explode at this point. Emerald helps Cinder up while Qrow calms Yang down to a point where she can think rationally enough to not lose her other arm.

At this point the fights are Qrow and Yang Vs Cinder and Emerald, Nora and Ozpin/Oscar Vs Mercury and Hazel. Jaune and Weiss are keeping Ruby alive as Jaune finds out he has his semblance.

While the chaos is happening Raven and Vernal who just watched all of this happen in about a minute decide to go down the elevator and see if they can get the relic without Cinder. Cinder notices them going down the elevator and lets Emerald know she is going down it. After Emerald covers Cinder as she disappears down the elevator shaft. Emerald, Mercury and Hazel move over to cover it and stop Qrow, Ozpin and the kids from getting in. Ruby has been moved to a safer corner and Weiss is now fighting again after getting her aura back.

In short things mostly proceed as normal, White fang is stopped, Yang gets the relic and Adam goes missing.

Blake walks in through the hole in the front, looks around and notices Yang and Weiss kneeling next to Ruby, but she isn’t looking the same as she last saw her and it wasn’t really the outfit. Then Blake realized that Ruby was bleeding from her right eye and ran over to check on her. After cleaning the blood out for a little bit the got her onto a more comfortable surface, 2 medics came in and got her onto a stretcher and started asking the basic questions like “What happend?”, “How Long?” and so on. After which they began bringing her to a medical tent but stopped just outside in order to let the crowd clear. While they were stopped Yang brushed her left hand across Ruby’s hair to which Ruby then open her eyes weakly asking in pain “ya-ng?” before passing out. While passing out she could hear Yang’s voice getting quieter until she was unconscious.

Between Volume 5 and Volume 6

Blinking weakly Ruby opened her eyes and winced from the pain across her body but mostly in her right eye. Looking around she noticed that her right eye was more blurry and had a fairly thick black line going through its middle, she still remembered what happened to her and how Yang saved her life. Yang! She needed to find Yang. After spending probably about 2 minutes getting out of bed because of the pain she managed to get to the door after realizing she was connected to an IV bag with water in it. After opening the door she looked down both ways, to her left was a door about a foot away and to her right was a hallway about 8 meters long with doors along the walls and lead into a living room. The noise from the talking kind of irritated her a little so she checked the door to her left which wasn’t super quiet but didn’t creak. Ruby wasn’t exactly quiet with her entry and got the attention of Qrow and Ozpin who were in a conversation. Ozpin told Qrow could have some alone time and exited the garage. Qrow quickly got Ruby a chair as Yang stopped working on Bumblebee (her Motorcycle), grabbed a bag labeled Samples and helped Ruby sit as the asked her some basic questions like “Are you hungry? Are you hurting? Do you feel sick?”. Ruby answered “Yes. Yes. No.” and so on. Her eye did start to bleed but Yang was quick to get it with a tissue. Ruby asked why she had a bag labeled Samples and was told that the medics found some kind of dust in her eye and asked for them to keep samples. After she stopped bleeding from her eye they had a hug which made Ruby a bit more happy and managed to make her smile a little, then she was helped up out of the garage and to a table for about 10 people and get her some food. While passing by everyone else they saw her and all felt a bit bad as Ruby went from zipping around to looking like a kitten with broken legs as she slightly limped and stumbled each step. She didn’t even have much of a smile on her face, it even looked like moving kind of hurt her. Ruby did ask Yang how long she was asleep and Yang told her almost 2 days. Ruby then ask who changed her, which makes Qrow tell her “We made a rule that guys aren't allowed to change your clothes for you.” and Yang also tells her that she did.

About 2 hours later at 9:00 am Taiyang knocks on the front door. Qrow answers and lets him in and he immediately asks were Ruby is. Qrow tells him and lets him know to be quiet as noise makes her uncomfortable.

Tai basically does what he did after The Fall of Beacon and asks if she wants anything. Ruby just says a hug and to be able to sleep which Tai then realizes that his precious Ruby isn’t the same as she was before this happened which causes him to cry while hugging her. Ruby does ask if Zwei is okay and her lets her know that after her fight at haven Raven came back and is currently living with him as her tribe kinda got destroyed, and she is taking care of Zwei. After he leaves her be Yang comes in to give her a Hug and change her IV bag. Ruby then manages to go to sleep as her room is pretty nice. Sage green walls with dark brown floor trim, the floor is a nice soft wood. The room is 5 meters wide by 4 long parallel to the hall. Her bed is made with a sturdy wood and a comfy mattress, the sheets are a nice soft light brown cloth with about 1 ft of a fluffy material she likes to cuddle with and some soft pillows. Occasionally Yang, Blake and Weiss have peek in while she was doing it. Yang’s reaction was “She is so cute like that”, Blake’s was a warm smile, and Weiss was a mild blush. Everyone else reacted in their own way, Jaune and Ren saying ”As long as she’s happy” and Nora saying she knew it would work, Tai and Qrow just felt better knowing she could still be happy. On the left wall there is a window with a curtain that is mostly kept closed. Along the wall opposite side from her bed there are two 1 meter wide by 1 foot thick by 2 meter tall bookshelf's on opposite sides of the wall and a nightstand next to her bed with a lamp on it. She got up later for dinner, talked a little bit and goes back to her room to read a little and sleep. During the night she has a Nightmare and ends out screaming a little as she wakes up and then starts crying. Yang is in her room in a few second followed by Tai and Qrow, everyone else was to tired to get up at like 1 am. Yang, Qrow and Tai were all trying to calm her down from her nightmare. They did manage to calm her down and made sure someone was with her every night in case it happened again.

Throughout the rest of the 2 weeks every night she had a nightmare but was quickly comforted. Also every once in a while someone would check up on her and help her with something or just relax with her. Mainly it was the girls but occasionally Jaune or Ren would come in and give her some cookies or lunch. While the girls did their respective things with her, Yang would generally come in to help her shower, Blake would read with her, Weiss would explain what happened that day or cuddle with her as Ruby asked of her and Nora would help her with exercise. Ruby did get better throughout the week, even being able to walk around the house on her own in 5 days. Although Ruby wasn’t allowed outside unless it was the backyard or she was with someone as she still couldn’t really fight right now. Another 5 days later team RWBY went to a mall which is were Ruby got her present for Yang. Before leaving the blanket Ruby had is packed up because the blanket was actually bought by them for her.

Volume 6

The train ride is mostly the same to the normal one, only difference is Ruby has a nap and a Nightmare but is comforted by Weiss. Weiss covers Ruby from a Grimm swipe, The train crashes and and Jinn explains what Ozpin hid from them WBY does get angry at him but Ruby tells her to knock it off and asks Ozpin if he hid it to protect them. He says yes and Ruby then explains that they have bigger problems then trying to kill each other like shelter and food. In the house where Weiss and Ruby just sleep together and Ruby doesn’t have a Nightmare. During the well section Maria realizes that Ruby’s eyes are even stronger than they should be probably because her right one has less eye holding back the light. As they come through the cellar Qrow asks whats happening sounding more sober than normal as the Apathy slowly crawl out of the cellar, he then throws a few bottles at them with Weiss before running out of the house with Ruby and Weiss. They get to Argus without any incident. After everyone reunites they go to Saphron’s house, and relax while explaining what happened. After a little bit Saphron comes in and sits in one of the couches and then Ozpin explains that he did hide the truth from everyone, Jaune holds him against the wall and screams at Ozpin which causes Ruby to go into one of her Panic attacks, starting of with a scream and then intense crying and her right eye flashing a little bit. Everyone looks at Jaune and Ruby in a surprised look as Jaune is caught off guard by that and drops Ozpin letting him back off from Jaune who’s in a startled state. Yang and Blake are next to Ruby in a second and Weiss is in about 2, and they start calming her down. Everyone else decides to give her some space as Yang, Blake and Weiss bring her upstairs to rest while Weiss watches over her. Jaune did get some dirty glares from Yang for like 5 seconds until she gets distracted by Blake nuzzling her to get her to stop. Terra then comes home as well with the child and sits down next to Saphron. Later when everyone is going out to get food Ruby and Weiss stay back in case of a Nightmare or Panic attack. They find Maria and learn about Ruby’s eyes and that they seem a lot stronger than they should be. Then they all have dinner. The next day they all go to the Atlas airfield gate and Cordovan she tells them Weiss and Ruby are allowed because Weiss because her father wants her back and Ruby because of the samples, but everyone else is not. After trying to see if they could make an exception Weiss has an idea and backs off and calls someone. Then Cordovan gets a call about 30 seconds after Weiss, Finishes and tells the team that they have one hour to get their things and be back, when they get back they pack their stuff as well as Qrow’s things. He comes back surprisingly not at all drunk. Ruby is somewhat happy but also really confused as to why. When they return to the airfield they are escorted to a small airship and flown to atlas. On the way there Ruby gives Yang the present which is a Gift card for Strawberry Sunrises, a cleaning kit for her arm, a new pair of sunglasses and a few tools that she can attach to her arm. Yang lets out a little laugh and hugs Ruby really hard to a point where she can’t breath. Meanwhile Cinder did have her fight with Neo but she ran away from Cinder as the intense wind reminded her of how she failed Torchwick. Later Cinder finds Adam who has an airship and she explains that together they can destroy team RWBY and that on a specific date he will assassinate Ruby before she wakes up which will lower team moral and make Adams target (Blake) easier to get. Cinder will finally have Ruby dead and more maiden powers. He agrees and lets her on as they head for Mantle.

Team RWBY and JNR was well as Qrow and Ozpin/Oscar land at atlas and are greeted by Penny, Ironwood and Winter who thanks Weiss for calling her rather than doing something reckless. Penny lightly tackles Ruby and then notices the scar in her right eye. Ruby tells her its fine and that she doesn’t want to talk about it but Weiss will fill her in, which Weiss agrees too. Ironwood somewhat loudly goes “YOU’RE SOBER?!” to which Qrow replies yes and lets him know about Ruby and noises as she is noticeably uncomfortable. Winter is absolutely caught off guard by Qrow being sober and just jaw dropped. The Ace ops watch from a little ways away glad they are having some fun and then introduce themselves.

Volume 7

Weiss went to catch Ironwood, Winter and Penny up on what happened, Jaune, Ren and Nora went for training, Yang went with Maria for tuning for Maria’s eyes and Yang’s arm and Ruby went with Blake to the lab where they took the samples and explained that they may be able to make lights that kill Grimm making cities a lot safer and so they also take a blood test as the samples are dried up by this point. Blake stayed by Ruby in case she had a panic attack as she knew what to do unlike the scientists. Luckily she didn’t have one and managed the appointment pretty well and even got a lollipop and a cookie. Then everyone met back up. After learning about the Amity Project they got their new outfits and weapon updates and to learn about Ironwoods plan. Then they help clear out the launch site and then are shown their dorms. Next they have the training montage and get their licenses. Everyone ends out going to the Movies or to the voting party and it goes as normally until Tyrian attacks. Penny fires her swords at him and then loses him in the crowd and then hears Ruby yell something before it goes quiet and the light come back on. Everyone sees the swords but also notice none of them a bloody or correctly aligned to hit any of the dead bodies correctly to kill them. Then Penny realizes Ruby is missing...

Meanwhile many blocks away Ruby is tied up in a chair while Watts and Tyrian are talking about the how the plan went well and other things. After a little bit Watts Unties one of Ruby’s hands after setting up a chess board and asks if she wants to play. She accepts and they constantly tie. Watts is impressed and even Tyrian is interested in the game while still absolutely confused on what they are doing.

Afterwards they manage to sleep until Ruby gets woken up by the riot and a Nightmare. Tyrian yells at her to shut up and gives her a small cut with the non poisonous part of his tail which makes it worse and Watts tells him its time to leave. Back in atlas about 2 hours ago Yang, Blake and Weiss got to their bunks but noticed Ruby wasn’t there but assumed she was helping Penny with something until Ren and Nora burst into the room and tell them Ruby’s been kidnapped which Yang almost doesn’t even take an airship down to Mantle. After about an hour and a half they go back miserably and sit there still in their huntress outfits for a few minutes and then they get a call, “We found her. While getting out of an abandoned basement they were spotted by protesters as they have Wanted and Warning signs everywhere and so a squad of robots looked over at them and start sprinting towards them as the start running down the alleyway”. After about 10 minutes of running while Ruby is bawling her eyes out, an airship pops in front of them and the speaker says: “Put your hands up!” to which they decide to ditch Ruby so Tyrian just dropped her on the ground pretty hard which isn’t helping with her bawling. The squad of robots and the airship chases after them. Ruby is still just bawling her eyes out which are starting to flash. Another airship lands on the street and Yang, Blake and Weiss hop out and run over to her. When they get to her they immediately start to try and calm her as Blake cut the ropes but Ruby was still bawling her eyes out and had even started soaking her clothes. After about 5 minutes of hugging, head rubbing, even a few kisses and a lot of tears she finally was able to be moved to the airship and explain while sobbing what happened as Yang texts it to Qrow. Meanwhile Qrow, Ozpin/Oscar and Ironwood are having a little break and Qrow is offered a bottle and he only has a little bit. Then he is asked why he isn’t drinking as much to which he explains that he feels that he was to drunk to keep Ruby safe and that it might get her or him killed and would make her and Summer happy. Then he gets a text from Yang explaining that they have her and what happened as well as that she isn’t badly hurt but was bawling her eyes. He nearly dropped the scroll as Ozpin decides to ask what is it and Qrow tells them shocking them. Back with team Ruby, she is still mostly sobbing but not as bad so Yang tugs her along while she cries into Yangs shoulder, Weiss hugging her from behind and Blake up ahead just telling people to give her some space as they are getting notifications that Ruby is no longer missing. After getting to their dorm and calming Ruby down to just tears, Penny comes in knowing its been a bit over 2 hours since she disappeared. Penny is shocked that Ruby is crying as she has never seen Ruby cry before. She asks Ruby is she is okay and she replies “Yeah... Sorry I scared you.” and then hugs Penny who returns it telling her she is a good friend. After Penny leaves Ruby is asked if she wants anything and she says: “Maybe to sleep all together?” to which they accept her request and start unfolding the couch into a bed. (In this AU teams have separate rooms) After changing into night clothes they go to sleep on the bed. (If you are curious this is the order from left to right: Weiss, Ruby, Yang, Blake.)

In the morning around 6:30 Yang woke up got out of bed easily since Blake had curled up on the bed, and started making some breakfast. Some PB&Js with milk and cookies for Ruby who was still asleep as Blake started to wake up. Then turning back to what she was doing yang then sees Adam and stumbles back ready for an attack that never comes as there is no one there. Blake rushes to Yang's side and asks why she is blocking from nothing to which she explains she thought she saw Adam and that he is out there still. Blake listens and then looks at Weiss who is waking up then jokes “Morning princess” to which Weiss doesn’t really care as she is being held onto by a sleeping Ruby. They all look at her smiling as she hasn’t been in a really great mood since haven, and then Ruby mumbles something along the lines of “We-iss... love... youuu...” which causes everyone to look quite surprised. About 3 minutes later Ruby wakes up and realizes she was holding Weiss and quickly lets go with her face going red and asks if she heard anything while she was asleep to which a blushing Weiss replies “N-o... yes” causing Ruby’s face to go very very red. Yang is basically dying laughing at this point and Blake is getting ready for CPR as Yang is laughing, choking and wheezing heavily. After they calm down without Yang needing CPR they have their breakfast and check their scrolls to see they have been given a day off and literally can’t do any missions today. So they just relax with the time they have like spending some time in the pool, going to the arcade, Even going to the library which Ruby finds a really good book that is like 10 inches wide which impresses Blake, they even play a little bit of tag and a few other activities. At some point they find Penny and have a chat with her and Winter. After that they go to a club that is fine with faunas and okay for Ruby (It isn’t loud enough to cause a panic attack). Then they head back to the bunks to which Ruby climbs onto her bed and immediately falls asleep. Later they had dinner with nothing really happening.

Early in the next morning at about 6:55 Adam is waiting in the hall waiting for 7:00 as that is when the doors open and the cameras to turn off. Just as they turn off and the door unlocks he heads inside, but someone sees him enter. As he grabs a wooden box to stand on so he makes sure its a kill, gets on it raises the knife above Ruby’s chest and brought it down. “Hey!” while bringing down the knife it misses her heart and goes into her stomach, Weiss kicks his legs out from under him and he hits the floor hard and Penny starts disarming and arresting Adam. Weiss is now trying to get the knife out of Ruby’s stomach while Yang helps Penny with arresting Adam. Blake is still waking up from her dream about cat nip or something I don’t know. After getting the knife out of Ruby, Adam was arrested and put into a cell with his weapon in another secure room. Later around noon Ruby and Weiss have a walk in a park and end out sitting on one of the benches under a tree. Weiss asks if Ruby did love her to which Ruby replies yes and then kisses Weiss on the cheek, Weiss then returns the kiss but on the lips for a few seconds before breaking off. Both are blushing very hard as Yang and Blake then come around the tree and go “Congrats!” to which Ruby yelps in surprise “YANG! I thought you were on a date with Blake!” to which Yang just replies “Yes but we also went here”.

The rest of the time is of training and dating. Everyone thinks Weiss and Ruby are very cute together even Qrow. Not much really happens for a while.

When they are invited to the Schnee manor not much really changes other that Bumblebee and WhiteRose flirting with their partners. Jacques gets arrested, Tyrian gets arrested, Watts getts messed up and RWBY + JNR + Ace ops are saving civilians, team RWBY gets called up to atlas to talk to Ironwood a little bit before Ace ops are finished up. While getting to atlas Cinder frees Adam and arms him and reminds him of what to do before she heads to the winter maiden. While running down the hall Adam is waiting behind a pillar for Ruby who is at the front, then comes past the pillar after seeing something red looks over and sees Adam with his sword raised and all she can do is block with her arm and- He cut right through her left arm (at just about past the elbow) which made her cry in pain as he front-flipped outta that convenient window. Ruby is now on the floor bleed badly and Yang is trying to stop the bleeding and Weiss is trying to calm he down the the blood flow isn’t as bad while Blake makes sure he isn’t coming back as he slides down until she can’t see him any more. She then check on Ruby who is still crying in pain but not as bad, Yang tells her to get some help. So Blake runs down the hall to the medical wing where some doctors are working with scientists on her blood samples and the dust that has been extracted, opens the doors and tells them Ruby lost her arm and one of them grabs a kit Blake sees is labeled Ruby and asks where as she shows them. By now Yang has Ruby's head on her thighs while calming her down and Weiss is still trying to stop the blood dribbling out of her arm. The doctor put some bandages that are really absorbent on the wound before spraying some antibacterial spray on it. Then with the kit open Blake, Yang and Weiss could see that it had 4 small and large joint pieces and 2 forearm, leg, thigh and upper arm parts so they were ready for something like this. After putting on the arm they gave her a blood injection so she wouldn’t pass out. After about 15 minutes they managed to get to Ironwoods office with Ace ops, who didn’t really care about Ruby’s arm to much. After Ironwood shows the black glass thingy Salem then does her thing and when telling Ruby about what her mother said Ruby then replies angrily “Well I’m angry. Meaning I will rip your legs off if and drag you to hell myself I have to” which shocks everyone including Salem who just ends the conversation. Then Ironwood explains that he is abandoning Mantle and declaring Martial law to which Ruby then tells JNR + Ozpin and Qrow + Robin about Ironwoods plan before he cuts her connection and after their one liners he pulls out his gun and shoots her in the chest breaking her aura. Yang attempts to hit him back but is deflected. After Ironwood leaves and the airship Qrow, Robin, Clover and Tyrian are in crashes the Ruby does her one liner and zips past the Ace ops. The fights go as per normal until the end where Tyrian is standing over clover ready to kill him until Qrow jams Harbinger through Tyrian who laughs like he does and then passes out from blood loss, and Qrow flops onto the snow from exhaustion and is arrested by Clover’s reinforcements. Weiss, Yang and Blake's fights end normally but Harriet manages to start choke holding Ruby as the rest of her team is ready to help her. Ruby then smashes Harriet’s foot with hers and then backs up into the wall, uses her semblance to get out of her grasp, Kicks her in the stomach and then full force punches her in the face with the robot arm slamming Harriet into the wall. Harriet is completely unconscious and Yang can’t help but be proud and a little scared of Ruby. Then Yang and Blake go to the airship while Ruby and Weiss go to find the winter maiden, find Cinder and Ruby uses her eyes on her. Penny becomes the winter maiden, Winter gives them a head start, Oscar learns how use his semblance, Ironwood gets mad and Salem is here.

To be continued...

I would continue but am now waiting for Volume 8 to be released so I can stay somewhat on track with the story and location(s)...

#Rwby #AU #Shattered Gem AU #RWBY Spoilers #WhiteRose #Bumblebee #Ruby #Weiss #Blake #Yang #Qrow #Winter #Penny #Cinder #Neo #Adam lives #You may make art but must credit me

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nova-fanart-dump · 5 years ago

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SCIENCE LECTURE

In my fic here, Sherlock has a little brainstorming session while drugged out of his mind, and this sheet of notes below is the result of it. I decided to write out a little explanation as to what all the individual parts of it mean. The explanation will be in the format of ITEM - TRANSLATION - BREAKDOWN. The item will be the selection of the notes that the section will be explaining, copied roughly verbatim for the reader's convenience. The translation, if needed, will be translating Sherlock's (my) shorthand into standard notation. The breakdown, then, will be the explanation.

Disclaimer: I was a medical student, before I had to withdraw due to hand injury, and my area of study in undergraduate was neuroscience and neuropsychology (and music performance, but that's not relevant here). I do try and explain everything in layman's terms, but 1) it will get a little technical in parts, fair warning, and 2) I'm still learning on how best to explain concepts to other. I try my best, people!

ITEM 1: THE LIST

1) Narcotics- hallucin? (Translation: Hallucinogen)

2) Sleep dep. Halluc (Translation: Sleep deprivation Hallucination)

3) Mycroft- test?

4) Lights show

5. GMO (Translation: Genetically Modified Organism)

6) Moriarty???

7) Acute psychosis xxx

Breakdown:

In the episode, Sherlock says that he had come up with seven possible reasons for how he, Henry, and John could have all seen the dog-that-could-not-exist, and that he'd settled upon narcotics as the most likely. I came up with a list of seven of my own reasons:

1) Narcotics- hallucinogen: self-explanatory, as explained by the actual episode.

2) Sleep deprivation hallucination: this episode takes place what appears to be several days into pretty severe nicotine withdrawal, for Sherlock. His sleep schedule seems to be disastrous as is, and the nicotine withdrawal would've made him even more wired, so there's a solid chance he hadn't slept for several days, which is long enough to for sleep deprivation-induced hallucinations. While the hypothesis itself is perfectly sound, Sherlock puts it at number 2 instead of 1 because A) Henry ALSO saw the dog, B) sleep deprivation induced hallucinations generally don't start out with a full-fledged monster dog screaming in your face. If this hypothesis had been correct, he should've been experiencing more subtle hallucinations all night long.

3) Mycroft- test?: As discussed in series four, Mycroft occasionally has been employing tests into Sherlock's mental stability for decades, focusing on what Sherlock believes to be a dog. Sherlock, being Sherlock, has likely noticed this. Mycroft knows Sherlock is hanging around Baskerville. Sherlock also knows Mycroft knows this. Under the influence of a paranoia-inducing narcotic, Sherlock very easily could suspect his nosy brother at being somehow responsible.

4) Lights show: Again, inspired by series 4, and how the illusion of a ghost is created in TAB with nothing more than a projector. The logistics of how this would actually work are hazy, which is why this is further down the list, and quickly discounted by Sherlock.

5) GMO: While GMOs are usually discussed in the context of resilient strains of plants, all it really means is genetically modified organism. I'm speaking as one educated in 2014+, not 2012 (the ep air date), but breeding an especially large dog, and genetically modifying it to have red eyes, would probably not be too difficult a feat, scientifically. It could even be glowing, if you spliced in that GFP gene that the scientist mentions! However, this possibility is unlikely, because it raises the very big question as to why the scientists would allow their experiment to roam wild and attack people, why the scientists would bother making it in the first place, why haven't others taken pictures, etc. This is why it's so low on the list.

6) Moriarty???: Similar premise as the Mycroft's inclusion.

7) Acute psychosis xxx: AKA, "I lost my mind". Very unlikely, because it doesn't explain why Henry shared his hallucination, has no explanation as to why or how, and he has no other symptoms suggestive of a psychotic break. Which is why Sherlock scratched it out, and marked it with three Xs.

ITEM 2: THE FEEDBACK LOOP

This refers to the diagram, sitting just to the right of the list.

Breakdown:

X -> SNS Act -> Occ. -> (SNS Act) | (Amyg up) (Temporal) (up up Amyg)

Translation:

Unknown Substance X -> Sympathetic Nervous System Activation -> Occipital Cortex

(Amygdala stimulation) (Temporal) (Further Amygdala stimulation)

Let's define some terms!

This little diagram is a positive feedback loop, drawn very messily and with multiple steps added in after the fact. In biology, a feedback loop is a circuit in which the output of a system feeds back around to affect the system's input, which indirectly affects the system's output again, and so on. A simple example of a positive feedback loop is as follows: Addition of Substance X to System yields output of Substance Y. Substance Y triggers the production of more of Substance X, which again yields the output of more of Substance Y, which again triggers more production of Substance X- and so on. (feedback loops in the body are far more complicated, and most will eventually trigger their own end, etc, but such discussion is beyond the purpose of this post).

Unknown Substance X = input of whatever Sherlock was drugged with

Sympathetic Nervous System = simplistically speaking, our autonomic nervous system has two parts that work together, the sympathetic nervous system, and the parasympathetic nervous system. PNS can be summed up as rest and digestion, while SNS can be summed up as fight or flight.

Occipital Cortex = simplistically speaking, the visual center in the brain. There are other areas involved, but this area is the key and center to visual perception.

Temporal = simplistically speaking, the auditory cortex in the brain.

Amygdala = simplistically speaking, the fear center of the brain.

(I am defining all these terms as their relation to this situation at hand, nothing more. The brain is not so simple as to allocate X Function to Y cortex.)

So, Sherlock theorizes that input of Drug X stimulates the SNS and/or the amygdala, which caused inappropriate occipital lobe stimulation leading to hallucinations, which increased Sherlock's fear response, which caused further SNS activation, and so on. He suggested temporal lobe as a possible step; however, at no point during the episode did the drug cause auditory hallucinations, which is why it's not including in the loop proper.

There are actually a few problems with his loop, because he drew it out on the fly, while high off his mind, and he's not a neuroscientist, but he's got the right idea. The inappropriate, uncontrollable stimulation of the amygdala is almost certainly what Drug X causes, and would result in fear, paranoia, and increased suggestibility, all stated symptoms of Drug X. Inappropriate amygdala stimulation leads to inappropriate SNS activation, which encourages hallucinations, but would not cause them directly. It's likely that the drug also caused overproduction of dopamine, which can cause hallucinations. (However, there is no guarantee the occipital cortex was involved).

Whatever the chemical cause of the hallucination, he "sees" the dog, freaks out more, amygdala continues to be stimulated, freaks out because he’s Sherlock and isn’t used to freaking out, and the cycle continues, which is what leads to Sherlock's panic attack/meltdown in the pub- short-term, we're able to handle those stress reactions, especially if they're rational reactions to a stimulus, but keep them going for hours at a time and the body will start to freak out.

ITEM THREE: SYMPTOMS LIST

3a. Tachycardia, (up)hidrosis, shaking, panic attack?, nausea, emesis

(up)hidrosis = hyperhidrosis

Breakdown: Very rapid heartrate, increased sweating, shaking, nausea, emesis = vomiting, panic attack? (Question mark because Sherlock is not convinced of the diagnosis. Even high off his mind, he's still got his pride- he's Sherlock Holmes! He does not Get panic attacks! >;0)

3b. NOT NICOTINE, WITHDRAWAL UPUPUP

Breakdown: as John says in the pub, Sherlock was pretttty wired before all of this. Sherlock notes down that these symptoms are not the result of the nicotine withdrawal, because he can still feel the now increased effects of the nicotine withdrawal going on alongside these new symptoms. Chemically speaking, Drug X probably wouldn’t have any /direct/ effect on nicotine withdrawal, but it very well might exacerbate it indirectly.

3c. OH NO EFFECT - NOT STIMULANT

Translation: Alcohol no effect - not stimulant

Alcohol, to our bodies, is a depressant. If you drink it with a straight stimulant, like caffeine, their effects will counteract each other; for example, if I want to drink but keep clear-headed, I'll have a soda with my glass of wine. (DISCLAIMER: this will not make it safe to drive, this will not prevent alcohol poisoning, this can be dangerous, and do not do it in anything but careful moderation). Sherlock, as seen in the show, gets a shot of alcohol, probably in a desperate bid to calm down. It also does not work at all, because he was not dosed with a stimulant, but a hallucinogenic. The hallucinations led to stimulant-esque effects, but with no stimulant to counteract, Sherlock would simply end up sloshed and panicking. Sherlock realizes that the alcohol is not having the desired affect, and, when he realizes he was drugged, concludes that it therefore can not have been with a simple stimulant.

ITEM FOUR: DIAGRAM B

Oral --> long-lasting VS inhale --> feedback loop

no IV/IM

BLOOD TEST NEC ASAP (check)

Breakdown:

While the identity/structure of the drug he was dosed with are important, the route/method of administration are also a huge factor of variability that affects the intensity and timeline of the symptoms. Sherlock mentions four different routes of administration, here: oral (PO), inhalation, IV, and IM (intramuscular). A drug taken orally will have slower and longer lasting effects than one that is inhaled: one that is inhaled will act almost immediately, as seen in the episode, and its effect will also wear off very quickly.

Sherlock theorizes he must have taken the drug either orally or inhaled it, because the only other options are being stuck with a needle at some point, which he is sure never occurred. (Really, there are a few other options, most notably transdermal, that is unlikely for other reasons). Because the drug affects him for so long, he assumes he must have taken it orally, but also allows inhalation a spot on the list, by noting it could have instigated a feedback loop, and continued affecting him even after it'd left his system. He also notes the need for an urgent blood test, in the case that there are still some traces left to analyze. Especially if the drug was inhaled, the blood needs to be drawn ASAP. (Without any information on the chemical structure of Drug X, though, I can’t make any sort of estimation on what results Sherlock’s own blood test would show, with the sample drawn ~8 hours after being dosed).

ITEM FIVE: TIMELINE

To the left of diagram B, eleven hash marks next to a supremely messy "hours". AKA, eleven hours of 'experimentation', after Sherlock realizes he was drugged.

(upside down-items):

ITEM SIX: FORMULA

C12H22O11

The chemical formula for a sugar, which, as Sherlock states in the episode, was his initial theory. This would suggest PO as method of administration, not inhalation, but Sherlock's also not thinking too straight, right now. Give him a break. (He's also probably got a ton more information on PO medications in his head than airborne compounds).

ITEM SEVEN: SHERLOCK'S THEORY

THC? -amyg overstim in subject

-no SNS activ

(scratched out, termed STUPID by Sherlock)

Translation:

THC? - amygdala overstimulation in subject

-no SNS activation

Breakdown (this is the most technical passage of the post, fair warning:)

The 'subject' in this case refers to Sherlock. THC, as you probably know, is is the primary hallucinogenic/psychoactive component of cannabis (marijuana). Also as you probably know, cannabis tends to reduce anxiety effects in most individuals, but in some, it results in a paradoxical panic reaction. We're not entirely sure why, but this panic reaction appears to be due to GABA paradoxical disinhibition. Essentially, in a standard patient, cannabis leads to mass increases in GABA, which is the calm-down chemical in the brain. However, in these select patients, cannabis' initial activation of GABA may lead to the brain telling the production of GABA itself to calm down, which lead to an overall decrease in GABA levels in the amygdala, which leads to a panic reaction. (Disclaimer: This is still a working theory in the scientific community, and all depends on an individual's makeup of receptors and neural circuits. This is by no means settled discussion, either the end result or its mechanism.)

Overall, irrelevant to THC and cannabis, patients with severe childhood trauma do tend to have amygdalas that are primed for overstimulation (possibly by the very process described in the paragraph above). Whether Sherlock deleted Eurus and Victor or not, those neurological affects aren't something he could just will away. This is not saying that if you have childhood trauma, you will have a negative reaction to cannabis- but it IS saying that Sherlock might be a candidate expected to have a negative reaction.

Now, given Sherlock's extensive drug history, I'm sure he tried cannabis, at some point. It is also, however, never once brought up in the series proper, which suggests he has absolutely no interest in trying it again- perhaps because he had a negative reaction the first time. The panic reaction and amygdala overstimulation would probably feel similar to how Drug X affected him, which is why, initially, Sherlock writes it down as a suggestion, and also notes that it would not directly cause SNS activation. (At this point, he is not sure if SNS activation is a direct symptom or not).

He then swiftly marks it out as a stupid theory, because he realizes that he has a very atypical reaction to THC, so the likelihood of Henry sharing his hallucination and panic is very low. More to the point, because his reaction is so atypical and unpredictable, it makes no sense that unknown criminals would drug them with it.

TO SUM UP:

Sherlock is a graduate chemist, not a medical doctor, neuroscientist, or neuropsychologist. He does seem to have a great degree of interest and expertise in pharmacology, and probably also has a lot of knowledge in different routes of administration, due to his own personal history and his interest in forensics. However, he has no need to know, for example, the exact neuro-chemical causes of hallucinations. Therefore, his sheet of data is intentionally a bit spotty and with questionable accuracy, at points. (He also gets a bit of a break, considering he was "off his tits", or whatever the fuck that means, at the time. Poor guy needs a rest and a blanket and a hug.)

And that sums up Ranowa's entirely unnecessary lecture on pharmacodynamics!

#Sherlock #science #ranowa sciences #since i had to withdraw from med school this is literally all my the use my STEM education is getting #enjoy enjoy enjoy

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mochismilesbrighterthansun · 6 years ago

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Blurred Lines

Chapter 2

Pairing: Park Jimin x reader

Word Count: 2443

Warnings: Dark theme, violence, bad language, eventual smut. Degrading names. Mentions of death.

Genre: Angst, Smut.

Summary: Jimin takes a job as a correctional officer alongside Jungkook. You are a prisoner in Max and deemed a very dangerous inmate. But Jimin can’t help but feel protective over you.

A/N: This story contains violence and abuse physical as well as emotional if it’s not your thing pls skip it.

“I noticed you stare a lot at Y/N.” Hoseok mumbled.

“Is there a follow up to that sentence?” Jimin replied chewing on some fries.

They sat at a burger joint close to the Correctional, they had been working there close to a month now and they had become good friends. Jiyoung had decided he did a good job on Max and decided to leave him there. Along with Hoseok and Jungkook. Today Jungkook was off so Jimin sat alone with Hoseok.

Jungkook had also commented on his watchful eye over Y/N. and he didn’t deny it. After that short talk they had while she was in solitary he felt oddly protective of her. He realized what she said was true, because Steve seemed weirdly friendly with the inmates. In a creepy way. As if they knew they had little choice in the matter.

“That’s dangerous man, I heard she is in for pretty bad shit killed some people and is here for like seventy five years?” he looked at Jimin. “She is bad news man stay away from her.” Hoseok bit a chunk of burger and chewed slowly waiting for a reply from Jimin.

“Who told you that?, did you look at her file?” Jimin asked interested. He pushed his food aside and looked at Hoseok.

He rolled his eyes and wiped his mouth with a napkin. “We are not allowed to look at files, but another guard from M1 I think?, just stay away, she is fucking nineteen years old for fucks sake, she had to do some bad shit to be there. And side note any relations would count as rape you know for your authority and shit?, It’s bad news.” Hoseok said.

“I am just curious alright?, she is always alone and we know Tania started shit last time when she got thrown on solitary I am just saying. We are supposed to help them no?”

Hoseok pondered for a second and smiled brightly.

“Okay, yeah you are right. We’ll help her.”

“Hoseok I didn’t say let’s break her out. She just looks…. Vulnerable.”

“Yeah she looked real vulnerable to me last week when she stabbed Brenda with her fork.” Hoseok laughed at Jimin’s expression. “I get what you mean though, We’ll watch over her but if shit gets bad we can’t show favoritism.”

Jimin smiled then. “Thanks I appreciate it.”

“Do inmates get to go to the library?” Hoseok asked Jinyoung.

“Usually inmates in max don’t but Namjoon doesn’t like to exclude inmates from using the library. He doesn’t like to mark differences amongst the inmates.” Jinyoung looked up from his computer. “Why, didn’t Johnson explained?”

“He said they weren’t allowed but just a week ago he took an inmate so I was fuzzy about the rules.” Hoseok replied.

Jinyoung shook his head. “Fucking Steve. Just yeah every inmate gets to use the fucking library.” he looked angry.

Hoseok turned away then.

“Thanks man!” Hoseok waved and jogged to catch up to Jimin. “He said yeah they can go to the library.”

Jimin rubbed his hands together, “I fucking knew it.” he whispered joyful.

“What did you know?” Jungkook asked catching up to them.

“That -” Jimin’s words died in his throat when he glanced up to Jungkook, he stopped causing Hoseok to turn and his eyes turned wide seeing Jungkook’s hair. “The fuck happened to your hair?” Jimin asked.

“You didn’t know?” Hoseok asked staring intently at the freshly dyed magenta hair.

“I live with the guy not sleep right next to him.” he turned to Hoseok. “Can he even work here with that hair?”

“Yeah no one gives a fuck really. He could shave it off and no one would bat an eye.” Hoseok replied. “Back to topic, she can go to the library.” Hoseok said.

Jimin smiled and resumed walking to his post. He looked for you but he couldn’t find you.

“Wasn’t she out of solitary?” Jungkook asked looking around.

“Yeah yesterday she was out here.” Jimin replied.

Hoseok walked up to them. “She went back to solitary, she smashed someone’s face on a table or a wall?, I don’t know. I just know she smashed a face.”

Jimin grew anxious then. He knew the kind of treatment you received in solitary.

“I am gonna go check on her.” Jimin said, but Hoseok grabbed his arm.

“No man, they are gonna notice something is up with you. I’ll go.” he moved away and began walking to solitary. He walked up to the window and checked the clipboard with the names. He located your name and walked to your cell.

He opened the small window and saw you on the floor curled in a fetal position. He banged on it trying to get a reaction but you didn’t move.

He took a hold of his radio and pressed on it. “Open cell seven.” he said into the small radio.

“Is there a problem?” asked a very calm voice to his liking.

“Just fucking open it!” he screamed into the receiver.

The cell slid open and Hoseok rushed to you kneeling trying to turn you. You were shivering, and when he fully turned you he realized why. There was blood on your side but there were several bruises on your face and arms.

“Hey can you hear me?” he spoke softly to you but you kept shivering.

He picked you up from the floor and began walking out. Someone must have informed Steve of Hoseok’s presense because he caught up to him.

“Hey man where are you taking the inmate?, she is very dangerous.” he said out of breath.

“Yeah man, she must be real dangerous right now as she bleeds to death.” Hoseok said not stopping to talk.

But Steve stood infront of him. “This happens alright?, just leave her in solitary and it’ll pass.”

“Steve you are my superior but if you don’t get the fuck out of my face I am gonna shove my knee on your dirty crotch and walk cause she is in need of medical attention fucker but I think you knew that and didn’t give two shits.” Hoseok was usually a nice bright person, but he spoke with so much venom even Steve recoiled.

Hoseok arrived at the medical unit and placed you carefully on the gurney. A doctor started checking your wound.

“This is infected, why didn’t you bring her sooner?” the doctor asked angered.

Hoseok looked at her, “What you think I knew she was like this?, I fucking found her in solitary like that!” he was screaming he knew but he couldn’t get over how bad you looked.

“Alright, calm down. Get out I need to undress her.” she looked at him expectantly waiting for him to say no. But Hoseok just turned around and walked out of the medical room. He slammed the door only to find Steve standing outside.

“You can’t leave an inmate alone in there with the doctor, she could hurt her.” he made a move to go inside but Hoseok blocked him.

“I don’t really know you but I do know if you try going in there while Y/N is getting checked out because side note she is half dead, I will personally make sure you are out on medical leave for a really long time.” Hoseok was right infront of him daring him to make a move.

Steve made a face, “What the fuck is your problem with her?” he made a face, “Ah, are you fucking her?, is that it?”

Hoseok grabbed at the collar of his shirt. “You are a fucking pig Johnson. You just wait until Namjoon knows about you.”

Steve pushed him off, “Don’t you dare open your mouth. I can make shit go real bad for you.”

“Don’t threaten me Steve that would be really stupid.” Steve smiled and walked away.

Hoseok turned back and knocked on the door.

The doctor peaked outside, “Can I help you?”

“Can you lock the door and not let anyone in until you are done?, I have to go do something but I’ll make sure there is a decent guard here at all times.” as he said this the doctor looked surprised.

“You actually care?, like of her safety?” she opened the door fully then.

“Yeah, “ he glanced at you on the gurney. “I do.”

He turned to leave and walked away. When he got back to where Jimin and jungkook were Steve was nowhere to be seen. As soon as Jimin spotted him his back straightened.

“Did you find her?” Jimin asked in a whisper.

“I need to tell you something but you need to make sure you remain calm. I can’t have anyone noticing anything weird alright?” Hoseok said looking around to make sure no one was paying attention. “Someone stabbed her.”

Jimin’s eyes practically bulged out, he made a move and Jungkook’s hands shot out to grab his upper arm.

“Calm down Jimin.” Jungkook said looking around.

“Who the fuck stabbed her?, was it that asshole?” Jimin asked through gritted teeth.

“Shhh Jimin,” Hoseok looked around once more. “She is in medical I told Seulgi I would make sure she was taken care of so there needs to be one of us up there with her. That asshole really was trying to leave her on Seg by herself and-”

“I’m going up there.” Jimin said moving before anyone could say anything.

“Yeah that wasn’t suspicious at all.” Jungkook said adjusting his belt.

Jimin walked through the hallways trying to get to the medical unit. He couldn’t explain why he felt so protective of you. Everyone talked about you like if you were a terrible person but he just couldn’t see it. Hoseok had confronted him on his behavior. But it wasn’t anything bad he just didn’t want anything bad happening to you.

He walked through the corridors with his heart pounding and it was strange, the fear of you actually being hurt. He reached on the door and tried to open it but it was locked. More fear, fear that Steve got there first. Without thinking he banged on the door.

He waited a little and banged again. The door knob rattled a little and he waited.

“Who is it?” a voice said from the inside.

“Park Jimin?, Hoseok sent me.”

The door fully opened and Jimin was led inside where he saw you hooked up on an IV. Your face was drained of color. There were bags under your eyes. There were bruises marring your skin. He couldn’t help but stare in horror.

“You new guards are a different breed, the ones in here don’t give a fuck about this inmates.” Her voice startled Jimin, he looked at her and then back at you. “I’ve been trying Y/L/N to medical for the longest time,” she walked over next to you and started cleaning a wound on your arm, “She’s been here for three years and change almost four. Has sustained gruesome wounds and never has that pig allowed her to come here.” she stopped working and looked at you, “I really hope this humanity in you two lasts,” she looked at him then. “I really hope Steve doesn’t get to you guys.” she turned her attention back to you and kept working.

“I never catched your name.” Jimin said walking to take a seat next to you.

“Kang Seulgi.” she replied. She put some gauze over your wounds. “She should be okay, I managed to stitch her wound it didn’t penetrate any major organs, and I cleaned all her other wounds. The infection should pass. She was heavily dehydrated.” she took her gloves off and went to wash her hands. “I need to go to M1, I trust you will stay here and keep an eye on her?”

Jimin nodded.

“Alright I’ll see you later Park.” she smiled brightly and turned to leave.

Jimin stared at your bruises a little longer before standing up and walking around the small room. You began to stir, he fully turned and walked to your bed. He sat down next to you and grabbed your hand.

You moaned, “Ow.” you tried to move but you winced. You opened your eyes but you couldn’t seem to focus on anything, until they landed on Jimin. You recoiled then, “What the fuck,” you looked at the IV on your hand and you tried to yank it but Jimin stopped you.

“Hey look at me…” he tried softly but you looked terrified. “Calm down Y/N, look at me.” you did turn to look at him then. His features were stricken with pity you thought to yourself.

“What’s going on?, where am I?” you asked, your voice was hoarse.

He frowned, “You are in the medical unit, Hoseok found you in seg, is your throat okay?” he asked. Your eyes seemed to water.

“I screamed when he put me in there, he kept trying to touch me so I screamed until,” you stop and look down at your hands. Jimin let go and sat down next to you.

“Until?” he prompted.

“Until he punched me in the face, I blacked out I don’t know what happened after that.” your voice broke and for the first time he saw the mask slip off. He recognized sadness and fear on your face. You finally turned to look at him. “Why are you here?” you recoiled, “He sent you didn’t he?!” you screamed and he went to grab your arms again.

“No he didn’t. I am here to prevent him coming in here alright?, your safe.” he said to your face. And finally a tear slipped, you yanked your arms and wiped angrily at your tears.

“Why are you being so nice to me?, it’s cruel you know?.” Jimin stood straight surprised at your words.

“What do you mean?”

“You show me kindness. I am used to violence and Steve being an absolute piece of shit but you come here and show me even the slightest kind act and I am eating it up like a fucking stupid puppy.” you laugh in your tears. “Just stop if you are gonna turn like the rest of them, stop pretending to be a decent human being.” you finally look at him to find a shocked expression.

He sits down and pulls his chair closer to you.

“If I ever act like that dick, I give you full permission to push me down the stairs alright?” he looks at you with a soft smile.

You still didn’t trust him, but you couldn’t help the small smile that threatened your lips, so you simply nodded.

Chapter 3

#jimin smut #yoongi #namjoon #hoseok #jungkook #taehyung #seokjin #bts smut #bts fanfics #bts scenarios #bts jimin #park jimin #prison au #bangtan boys #BTS #park jimin smut

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diyunho · 7 years ago

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The Joker x Reader - “Mommy” Part 3

It was a well known fact The Joker’s girlfriend left him with four young children and disappeared. It was also known that his ex stepped up and took care of them even if she didn’t have to. The King of Gotham might have lost his woman, but he never lost his Queen.

Part 1 Part 2 Part 4 Part 5

After 2 months

The Joker is alone in the VIP room, enjoying his solitude; he ordered everyone to clear the premises and wait outside since his business meeting ended earlier than expected. Out of the blue, the cell alerts of a new message. J slides the screen and a picture with you and Mia laughing pops up: you are both wearing matching headbands with yellow flowers, identical pearl necklaces and PJ’s made from the same fabric.

He barely smiles, when a new picture with you and now all the boys added in the frame pops up, apparently ready for bed. The Joker’s smile gets a little bit wider, then after a few seconds it disappears under the usual frown. He starts texting something back but changes his mind and erases the words, staring at the images one more time before placing the phone inside his pocket.

At the penthouse, you didn’t even wait for a reply since J never comments when you send him pics with the children; you get notifications they were seen and I guess that’s the best you’ll ever get.

“Kase honey, stop jumping on the bed, it’s time to sleep, ok?”

The four years old is still energetic so he keeps on jumping, chanting your name:

“Mo-mmy! Mo-mmy!!! Mo-mmyyy!!!”

“Kasey, be good and listen to me!” you try to make him behave while exiting his room with a clear purpose: taking Mia to her crib. The baby girl fell asleep in your arms, resting her head on your good shoulder. You are really not supposed to hold the kids or lift them up since it will take a while to completely heal from the injury you sustained, yet sometimes you can’t help it.

You carefully place her in the cradle, sneaking up into the room next door to make sure the twins are still dozing off. Thank goodness they are and you close the door to their bedroom, immediately rushing to Kase’s room when you hear the thud followed by crying.

The boy was hopping up and down when he accidentally moved too much towards the edge of the bed and landed on the floor right on his face. The carpet is soft but the impact scared him nevertheless.

“My poor little man,” you pick him up, worried he might have broken something.

Kase whimpers and hugs you, searching for comfort. You kiss the child’s head and caress his back, soothing the pain.

“Are you ok?” you wipe his tears, making him sit on the bed while you analyze him.

“Y-yes…” he stutters, sniffling.

“Then why are you crying honey?” you ask, cupping his face and the answer makes you hold in the laugh.

“Don’t know, mommy…”

“You’re silly,” you kiss his cheek, happy nothing bad happened. “You want me to read you a bedtime story?”

“U-hum, “ he nods, distracted by the offer. You get Kase under the covers and snuggle with him, reading until he falls asleep. And the busy day you had catches up with you, making you snooze in there before you have a chance to go to your own bedroom.

*************

“Y/N…Y/N, wake up!” The Joker shakes you and finally gets a reaction; he’s been calling your name and you didn’t even hear his first attempts.

“What time is it?” you turn towards him and Kase instinctively moves closer, searching for the warmth of your body.

“It’s 2 in the morning. Come on, hurry up, we have to go: it smells like gas downstairs, I think we have a gas leak!”

“Jesus!” you wake up in an instant, pulling Kase in your arms and struggling to get up; your shoulder hurts since you carried Mia around yesterday. “I’ll take him, go to the car!” he wraps his son in the blanket, not fazed by the protesting moans.

“Dadddddyyyyy,” the boy yawns, closing his eyes, upset with the ruckus.

“You’re fine, brat !” J lifts him higher in his arms and follows you. You want to get the other kids, but some of the henchmen are already helping, having them in blankets and heading towards the elevator. The gas detector is beeping in a frenzy but you were so exhausted you had no clue.

“Yuck, the smell,” you cover your nose, waiting for J to catch up with you. “Are we going to my house until this is taken care of?”

“I suppose so,” he growls and you know why: The Joker hates your house, always complains it’s too small.

Situated on the property you use as the children’s playground – 3 bedrooms, 3 bathrooms, a large living room and a spacious kitchen- the one level home is more than enough when needed. Since you live mostly at the penthouse, you never feel the need to upgrade. Usually the boys sleep in one bedroom and you sleep with Mia, this way J has his own room. If he’s not coming to stay when you take the kids there, you move Aiden and Zane to their father’s bedroom. Simple and easy.

Not for The King of Gotham though. “Simple and easy” are not his thing.

***************

“It’s cold in this stupid house!” J complains as soon as he enters the master bedroom where you gathered all the kids in the same bed, waiting for the central heating to warm up the house.

“You know I don’t have the heat on when we’re not here; it’s not safe. Be patient, it will get hot soon,” the reply attempts to explain the obvious situation.

“Gimme 2 kids, I need to warm up. I’ll take them to my bedroom!” he gestures towards the twins.

The two year olds are not excited about their dad’s strategy: they are cranky and whiney because they got woken up in the middle of the night and transported to another location. They hold on to you, burying their faces in the pillows.

“Hugging all the kids, hm?” J snarls, irritated. No other choice but to crawl in the big bed also.

You choose not to comment: how is this your fault?!

The Joker snatches Mia that is sleeping in your arms and places her on top of him, moving Kase to his left, this way he has some bodies around to warm up with.

“That’s better,” he grumbles, covering everyone with an extra blanket. Kase reaches for you, wanting to go back to the spot next to his mother but J won’t have any of it:

“Stop wiggling and sleep!”

“I want my mommy,” his son complains and The Joker gets mad:

“What am I, decoration?! She’s literally a few inches away!”

“Kase, go to sleep honey, ok?” you plead, touched by how much the children love you. “Mommy’s here.”

In about 30 minutes the house reaches a comfortable temperature and J tiptoes out of crowded bed, wanting the privacy of his own room.

You keep on tossing and turning; your shoulder aches and you’ll definitely need some pain killers if you want to be able to rest. You slowly move away from the kids, not wanting to startle them. It’s so sweet to see the four innocent souls peacefully dreaming, curled up under the cozy fleece blankets.

“J, are you still awake?” you knock at his door.

“Yes, come in,” he turns on the lamp, curious on why you’re still up. You open the door and step inside.

“My shoulder hurts and I forgot the painkillers at the penthouse. Can we send…”

“I have your med,” he shows you his coat on the chair. “Upper pocket.”

“Oh, that’s awesome!” you sigh, digging in there and retrieving the much needed remedy. ”Thank you.”

“Here,” he dismisses your gratitude, handing over the bottle of water kept on the nightstand.

You swallow 2 tablets, taking a deep breath when the sharp pain pokes at the surgery site.

“Get in,” The Joker slides on the sheets, making space for you.

You almost choke on the water and he rolls his eyes.

“Are you afraid I’m gonna take advantage of you?”

“No,” you hesitantly debate on his proposition, confused about it.

“Then get in,” he reinforces his will. “Don’t look at me like that!” J glares in your direction, not a big fan of that intrigued expression on your face.

You listen to him though and comply.

“What did the doctor say? Do you need more blood transfusions?” he starts the conversation as soon as you are next to him. You bite on your lip, nodding a no. “Well, if you do let me know, alright?”

“OK…” you agree, perfectly aware on why he’s interested: after all the blood loss you sustained with the stabbing, you needed more to replenish what was depleted. They had you hooked up to the IV ready to go, when J had a fit because the doctor didn’t notify him of the procedure. The Clown Prince of Crime was furious he wasn’t asked to donate blood: he’s a universal donor, a match for all blood types. Of course the medical team had to apologize and be thankful they weren’t killed on the spot.

They also had to listen to his rant about how generously rewarded they were for being allowed to take care of the mother of his children and how they couldn’t even keep him updated on your condition. That was the first time you heard him talk like that and it was hard to hold in the tears: it made you aware he did appreciate the sacrifices his ex-girlfriend made over the years while taking care of his babies. The Joker just never showed it; he’s not that kind of person.

Needless to say you do have his blood running through your veins now. And you could have more if necessary.

You stare at each other in silence: you have a feeling there’s a purpose to his behavior.

“Why did you remove the tattoo?” J unexpectedly blurs out.

Ahhh, there we go: that’s why you were cordially invited to stay; he wants to talk about stuff bothering him. Might as well since you want to take a few things off your chest also.

You answer with a question:

“Why would I want my ex boyfriend’s name on my skin?!”

“I worked on that tattoo for weeks! It was perfect, my best one !” J cuts you off.

It’s always about him, of course.

“We weren’t together anymore, no point in keeping it…”

“I worked on it !!!”

This is not going well.

“The lack of a tattoo doesn’t…”

“I spent weeks on that ink!” he interrupts again.

But you can’t hold in your own escalating anger:

“Why did you always bring Anya back?! Why did you tolerate her behavior?! Why did you keep on getting her pregnant?! She was horrible! And you didn’t want to have any children with me when we were together ! I would have been a great mother!!”

You lick you lips, running out of breath after the valid outburst. The Joker’s eyes have a sudden threatening sparkle, not expecting you’ll turn the tables on him.

“I don’t have to explain myself to you !” he grumbles, annoyed. “But I have to?!” you fight back, more and more upset. “Why…” and your voice breaks…”Why did you like her so much?…”

“I don’t like anybody!” he mutters through his silver teeth.

“You did like her a lot, it’s obvious…” you sadly smile. “And she neglected the kids, almost killed her own daughter… She never cared about you either…So…why did you like her so much?” you persist, unwilling to quit. At this point there’s no use: you are both fired up.

“Get out of here!” his menacing voice shrieks. “Get out before I might do something I can’t take back !” he pushes you away, struggling to contain his temper. “OUT!”

You don’t budge and J continues to violently shove you towards the end of the bed.

“Get out I said !” he pants, provoked by your rebellious behavior.

You don’t even feel the shoulder pain anymore or anything else for the matter.

“Why did you like her so much?” you repeat and he covers your mouth, rolling on top of you. The Joker realizes you’re not attempting to escape his grip; you just gaze at him without squirming.

“Get out of my sight!” J hisses, annoyed at your apathy; you’ve been in charge of his security for years, he knows you can defend yourself.

Why don’t you?

He lifts himself up a bit in order to give you one last nudge that will make you fall off the bed, when your arms tightly wrap around his neck, pulling him back on top of you.

“Why did you like her so much?” you forcefully hold him close when J wants to escape the embrace. “Why did you like her more than me?” you whisper in his ear and start crying, unable to suppress the burning question you wanted to ask for years. “I was loyal, I really loved you and never cheated,” your shaky voice makes him pay attention. “And you still broke up with me. And I didn’t object continuing to work for you when you asked. And I took care of your children when you asked,” you start sobbing and his face is buried in your neck, still mad yet listening. “You told me you trust me and that I never stopped being the Queen…Queen of what?” you lift his head up so you can look at him.“Queen of nothing?” and the tears keep on uncontrollably stream down your cheeks, your heart aching a hundred times more than the stabbing wound.

The Joker doesn’t bother to react or protest when you finally slide from under him, catching your breath while sitting at the edge of the bed. You wipe your eyes and prepare to go back to the kids just as his words barely make it out:

“You’re my children’s Queen and The Queen of this city. And…and my Queen since I can’t find a better one I can trust…”

Instead of making you happy, the sentences deepen your gloomy mood. J gets under the covers, turning his back on you, done with it all. He senses you scooting over closer to him until your steady breath lingers on his neck.

“Why are you still here?” he grouchily mutters and he feels your lips pressing on his shoulder.

“You want me to go?” you sigh. “Or…can I stay?”

“Suit yourself,” he reaches for the lamp and turns it off, not opposing to your left hand finding its way around his waist.

You’re almost napping when The Joker reopens the discussion:

“If by some miracle one of these days you manage to keep a man and get married, you still have to take care of the children; that’s an order !” he spits out with a hateful tone.

“ I really love your children; I couldn’t abandon them,” you cling to him more, somehow comforted when your hand is being moved from around his waist and kissed after a few seconds.

***************

The next day he avoids you.

You spend a lot of time outside on the porch, watching the kids play in the snow: even if is mid-February, there is plenty left for them to enjoy.

“Mommy… for you,” Zane gives you a snow ball, excited it made you smile. Mia is chewing one of her toys, cozy on the thick blanket she’s placed on at your feet.

“Thank you baby,” you kiss his nose, making sure to button up his jacket one more time. He likes to unbutton it; surely takes after his father, can’t keep stuff buttoned up. The thought gives you a sudden boost of positivity while watching him run back to his brothers. Aiden trips him and they both fall to the ground laughing, Kase trying to squeeze in between them because he wants to join in the fun.

“Don’t hurt yourselves !” you shout, the maternal instinct surfacing for the millionth time today and you help Mia up, the cute Princess standing without too much help; pretty soon she’ll be able to walk on her own.

You peak behind you through the huge glass windows, seeing The Joker talking to Frost. The King of Gotham is fast to throw something in the trash can, visibly irritated.

“Mommy, look !” Aiden yells, showing you the wall of snow he’s starting to build with his siblings.

“Good job honey!” you praise, waving at the boys and J steps outside, crabby disposition noticeable from a mile away. “Hey, did Frost tell you how long it will be until we can return to the penthouse?” you’re curious to find out since you hardly spoke to him since this morning.

“At least one week,” he growls, displeased at the news. “The pipes need to be replaced at the lower level. Only one duct was leaking, but they want to change all of them for safety.”

“That makes sense,” you grunt and lift Mia up, The Joker scolding:

“You’re not supposed to do that !”

“I know, I know,” you agree and he gestures for her. After finding herself in his arms, the little girl starts munching on his coat’s collar, babbling words that almost resemble “mama” and “dada”.

“Greeeat, another one to chew my ears off,” he frowns and it doesn’t go well with you.

“Why do you have to take the joy out of everything? Aren’t you happy Mia will walk and talk soon?” you sulk, not understanding why he can’t appreciate the little things.

Sarcasm follows:

“Sure, why wouldn’t I be? It’s something a kid never did before, right? Pfft,” he scoffs, ”you’re the one that got emotional when each kid learned to walk and speak; I don’t get the hype.”

“Of course you don’t,” you grumble, concluding the children must be hungry after playing for so long. “Darlings, come inside; it’s time to eat!”

************

You stop drinking your tea and elbow J, making him pay attention to the touching scene taking place at the kids’ table: the boys are eating and feeding their little sister also. Kase is actually standing, holding her hand and she nibbles on the chicken nugget offered by Aiden. As soon as Mia starts chewing, the boys eat some more too, waiting for her to finish what she has in her mouth.

Your eyes get teary; even if they did it before, you find it irresistibly adorable.

“That’s very cute,” you gulp, getting ready to help. The boys can mostly feed themselves, yet their mom’s intervention is more than welcomed.

J smirks, quietly adding more salad to his dish.

You head over to the counter, wanting to dump leftovers from your plate in the garbage can before helping the kids. The small box resting on top of the trash is discretely taking out by a curious Y/N. Is this what he threw in there earlier?!

You open it and hold your breath: it’s a gold bracelet; a simple circle beaded with a few diamonds, engraved with plain, meaningful words:

To: Mommy

From: Kase, Aiden, Zane and Mia

J hears you sniffling behind him and turns his head to see what’s going on. You hold the bracelet in the palm of your hand, speechless.

“Why is this in the garbage?!” you bite your cheek. “Help me put in on please.”

He doesn’t seem willing to fulfill your demand.

“I had no clue you dig in the trash now! Is it a part time job?” he mocks, cranky you found the customized gift he ordered eight days ago and decided to dispose of.

“Help me put it on,” you disregard his bitterness and J nags:

“It’s a gold hoop, easy to use, no clasp or nothing.”

“I want you to help me… please…”

That’s the point: you want him to do it.

“You’re annoying !” he yanks at you wrist, gliding the bracelet against the soft skin.

“Daaadddy, I’m thirsty,” Zane whines, coming over with his empty cup.

“Oh goody, someone finally needs me!” The Joker’s sassiness escalates for no reason.

***************

You creep inside his bedroom without knocking and lean your back against the closed door, waiting.

“Can I sleep here?” you utter, not looking his way.

“It’s your house, isn’t it?” the indirect invitation follows and you crawl in the bed by him, keeping a safe distance. “We can fit the twins between us; why aren’t you coming closer? Or are you scared you won’t be able to behave?”

You actually giggle, surprised you feel nervous.

“I think I’m alright, ” and you bring your body near his, cuddling like you used to years ago when you were together.

“Here’s the thing Y/N,” The Joker lifts your chin up. “If you sense any activity bellow my waist, don’t flatter yourself. It’s just a natural reaction due to the closeness. Are you…are you fucking blushing when I’m just messing with you?!” he teases and you feel your cheeks burning.

“I’m not blushing,” you whisper, embarrassed at your stupid vulnerability.

“You totally are,” J grins and you are aware it’s true. You wiggle in his arms, cautiously considering your next words. The smile perishes on his lips when you ask:

“J…Can you make love to me?”

He looks surprised and you feel awkward.

“That was dumb to say,” you patch your mistake with a fake, clumsy laugh.

“Of course I can,” The Joker’s face comes really close to yours. “The question is if I want to.”

“Well,” you gulp, “do you want to?…”

“Maybe…” he gropes you, thinking. Or is he just pretending?

“Moommyyyyyy,” is heard from the next bedroom, Aiden starting to cry because he probably had a nightmare.

“Such a missed opportunity,” J chuckles and you get out of bed in a hurry, but he grabs your hand, squeezing it before releasing the hold: “Come back afterwards.”

***************

The children weren’t used to find their mommy sleeping in the same room with their father, but that changed two years ago. They don’t know what it means, but one thing’s for sure: they love coming in the master bedroom at the penthouse and jump on the bed, waking up both parents and horsing around all morning until The Joker hides under the pillows, displeased with the noise.

Mommy never complains though; she always shows her affection and lets them touch her growing belly, telling them their new sister is in there. So fascinating for the kids! And they are getting more and more impatient, especially the little girl: she was told she will be the big sister and it sounds like an important task.

*************

“Baby?” the three years old Mia’s squeaky voice inquires, excited and curious to see such a tiny doll in your arms.

“Yes honey, this is your sister Emma,” you smile, pecking her forehead. You are sitting on the floor with the kids around you and they are seeing their sister for the first time.

“Waahhhh, she’s so cute,” Kase caresses the small head, mesmerized.

“Can I kiss her?” Zane claps his hands, puckering his lips.

“Sure,” you agree and Aiden wants to do the same.

“Me too!” the oldest kisses her also and Mia pushes him away, pouting:

“She’s my sissy!”

“Hey, hey, no fighting! Emma is everybody’s, ok?” you try to alleviate the quarrel, amused it’s already starting. It took like…40 seconds for the rivalry to surface.

“Look daaa’yy, baby!” Mia snickers, presenting Emma to her father like some kind of treasure. He’s been sitting at his desk, watching their reactions. You smile, softly rocking the new born when it fusses from the commotion.

“I know, I made her,” he sneers, winking and the kids are completely absorbed by the new addition to the family.

“Can I hold her?” Zane extends his arms and you carefully place Emma in his grip, holding both of them so he won’t drop her.

You notice the Joker is the proud possessor of a very arrogant aura and you know why: he’s been bragging all afternoon that he makes very cute babies and no matter how the mom looks like, he compensates for the deficit. Such nonsense!

But the annoying truth is that he does make beautiful babies.

“Mommy, can I hold her too?” Aiden begs, getting you out of daze.

“Sure can,” you nod, wondering when the jealousy will actually kick in.

You are definitely prepared for the challenge: this might have been your first pregnancy, but it’s actually your fifth child. It shouldn’t be too hard since…

Once a mother always a mother.

Also read: MASTERLIST

http://diyunho.tumblr.com/post/153664676321/joker-x-reader-masterlist

#the joker x reader #the joker fanfiction #the joker imagine #the joker jared leto #the joker #jared leto #joker #joker fanfiction #joker x reader #mister j #mistah j #mr. j #puddin #dc #the suicide squad #dc comics

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star-trekkin-across-theuniverse · 8 years ago

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TrekFest 2017

Four times you fell for Bones, and the one time he fell for you, pt3: The Tempest

Word Count: 1878 Tags: @dolamrothianlady, @supermoonpanda, @kirkaholic123, @shewhorunswithfandoms @youdonebeengarthed, @starmission@emmkolenn@auduna-druitt @outside-the-government @yourtropegirl@pinkamour1588@impalaanddemons @flirtswithdanger@southernbellestatues@engineeringtrashcan @rayleyanns @sistasarah-sallysaidso @samaxraph99

You weren’t sure which came first: the ship’s sudden tilt or the red alert klaxons. Whichever it was, it woke you from a dead sleep, the jolt dropping you to the floor like a sack of bricks. You pushed yourself to your feet just in time for the ship to rock again, knocking you back down onto the bed.

“Attention all personnel, this is Captain Hamada. We are under attack from a small Klingon squadron. Battle stations.” The Captain’s voice rang over the speaker, her tone clipped and terse. The communicator on your bedside table whistled and you flipped it open.

“Ambassador Y/L/N, please report to the transporter room. We’ve sustained significant damage. Our distress signal has been picked up and we will be within transport range in five minutes,” Captain Hamada sounded just a terse over comm as she did on the shipwide speaker.

“Just give me your orders, Captain, and I’ll ensure they are met.” You pushed yourself back to your feet and collected the files you were transporting. Amongst them were included the plans for a new class of ship, designed by the New Vulcan Science Academy. It was not something you or Starfleet would want captured by the Klingons.

“Just get yourself and those plans off the ship,” Captain Hamada replied. You flipped your comm closed and followed the wall to the exit the room, leaning heavily against the bulkhead to keep your balance all the way to the transporter room. After a few more direct hits to the ship, you finally made it to the transporter, and were immediately directed onto the pad for transport with a number of injured. When you rematerialized, you recognized Lieutenant Commander Scott, and realized you were on the Enterprise. You handed your file bag over to an Ensign.

“Please take that to Captain Kirk’s ready room. I’ll help get these injured people to MedBay,” you directed.

“It’s nice to see you Ambassador, although the circumstances aren’t ideal,” Scotty waved at you as you began to help a bleeding ensign off the transporter pad. You forced yourself to smile to acknowledge him before leading the crewman out to MedBay.

You moved between the transporter room and MedBay more times than you could count, ferrying the wounded to the capable hands of Doctor McCoy and his team, until finally, you were assisting Captain Hamada into MedBay, just as an explosion that you realized must be the Lincoln rocked the Enterprise. Hamada flinched and braced herself against you, and you pulled her into your arms empathetically.

“It’s just a ship, Zeina,” you soothed. “You said it yourself, all souls accounted for.”

“But I was my ship,” she retorted.

“And your crew,” you countered. “Each one, alive. Come on, you’re bleeding. Let’s get you to MedBay.”

MedBay was chaos, the nurses practically flying, they were moving so quickly. The medical crew from the Lincoln had triaged the crew as they had sent them over to the Enterprise, and aside from Captain Hamada, had been the last to come across. MedBay was overcrowded, and despite two full medical teams, understaffed. You caught Christine Chapel’s eye, and she directed you over to a free spot along the wall.

“We’re about to open the secondary MedBay, Ambassador,” she explained. “Can I get your help transporting patients?”

“Of course. Just tell me what to do,” you nodded. You began the process of assisting crew to the other MedBay on her directions, and when the patient transfers were complete, you found yourself back in MedBay, looking to help. Nurse Chapel kept you busy, running supplies to and from various biobeds, and at one point sent you back to the secondary MedBay to collect more dressing materials. While you were down there, the CMO of the Lincoln gave you a list of medications she needed brought down from the main MedBay. For the next while, you ran between the two MedBays, probably more useful than if you’d stayed in one or the other.

As the least critical crew were managed and discharged, you found yourself helping with accommodation, bringing supplies to a large cargo bay that had been set up with cots. As you assisted, Captain Hamada stumbled into you, losing her balance. Worried about her well-being you sat her down on a cot and looked at her carefully, uncertain what you should be checking for.

“Zeina, tell me what’s going on,” you asked. She looked at you, but couldn’t focus, narrowing her eyes and leaning forward.

“I’m not sure. My ears are ringing,” she complained.

“Did you hit your head?” You asked.

“I stumbled into the bulkhead on my way on transport, yeah,” she admitted. You helped her to her feet and led her back to MedBay, finding an empty biobed and helping her onto it.

“I’m sure that I’m fine,” she protested, weakly, closing her eyes. Even with no medical training, you could tell she was not. You flagged down a passing nurse and pulled her aside.

“Captain Hamada seems to have some sort of head injury, and is not well,” you explained. The nurse looked her over, asking a few pointed questions, and grimacing at the responses, which didn’t make sense.

“Doctor McCoy!” The nurse called. “I need you.”

McCoy strode over quickly. “I thought I’d discharged Captain Hamada?”

“Her GCS is 11, with abnormal pupillary reaction. Ambassador Y/L/N brought her back up,” the nurse responded as McCoy double-checked the assessment. As he was flashing a penlight in her eyes, she began to convulse. You froze, unable to move.

“I need four milligrams lorazepam IV, stat,” McCoy called. He turned around and saw you standing there, wide-eyed. “And get the goddamn ambassador out of here! She’s fucking useless in here!”

You shook your head, snapping out of your trance, and blinked away unbidden tears at his harsh words, turning and running from the MedBay.

You were sitting on cot in the cargo bay, amongst the crew of the Lincoln, staring at the plans that, at worst, had caused the Klingons to attack, and at the very least, had been prioritized over the safety of the crew. Without knowing how Captain Hamada was faring, it made you rethink so much of your career. You were lost in the confusion of feelings when you felt a hand on your shoulder. It was Captain Kirk. He smiled sympathetically at you

“Ambassador, I’m going to need to debrief you. Bring your files. We have a secured subspace frequency open to transmit them to Starfleet Command,” he explained. You nodded, and followed him wordlessly. Once you were in his ready room he gestured for you to sit and offered you a glass of water. “There’s a great deal you won’t be able to tell me, Y/N, but let’s start with what you can. What was the nature of your diplomatic mission?”

“It was pretty straight forward, Jim. A quick hop to New Vulcan to drop supplies. While I was there, I was asked to transport colonial reports back, and the New Vulcan Science Academy let me know the new Nebula class ship plans were ready. It was decided I would transport everything back to Earth,” you started.

“You’re blaming yourself, and you know better than to do that,” he observed. You gave him a rueful smile and shrugged.

“Doctor McCoy pointed out quite succinctly that I’m fucking useless.” Your response was wry. Jim arched an eyebrow and seemed surprised.

“I’m sure that’s not in context,” he chastised you. You shrugged again and bit your lip.

“I’m afraid my presence has never pleased the good doctor,” you commented. “I rather think he finds me burdensome.”

“Bones speaks highly of you, Y/N,” Jim disagreed. “But he’s not always good at expressing that in person.” He was paged back to the bridge interrupting any further conversation. “Make yourself comfortable, Y/N. We’ll be trying to sort out quarters for the crew of the Lincoln shortly, but in the meantime, feel free to stay here in my ready room.”

“Thanks, Jim.”

You’d discovered a copy of The Tempest, your favourite Shakespeare play, sitting amongst the various antique books Jim had on his bookshelf, and you were carefully thumbing through the brittle pages, reading the passages that were so familiar to you. You could have recited them, but there was something about the old book, the musty smell, the yellowing paper. It comforted you.

“Oh brave new world, with such people in’t.” A soft, low voice with a distinct drawl spoke, startling you with its proximity. You furrowed your brow, astonished that Doctor McCoy had managed to sneak into the ready room without you noticing.

“Sweet lord, you play me false,” you countered, snapping the book shut. You rose and brushed past him, replacing the book to the shelf.

“I deserve that,” he admitted, sighing heavily. “I owe you an apology.”

“You do,” you agreed, nodding.

“In my haste to treat Captain Hamada, I wasn’t thinking the impact of my words. I meant that you could be of no further help in MedBay,” he explained.

“You said I was fucking useless,” you reminded him.

“Something I suspect I will regret for the rest of my life.” He gave you a remorseful smile. He drew in a deep breath and took your hand, leading you to the couch, and gesturing for you to sit. He kept hold of your hand, and looked you in the eye. “Not only are you not useless, you caught something that none of us in MedBay did. Captain Hamada had a bad head injury, and in the chaos of assessing the crew of the Lincoln, not a single one of us saw what you did.”

“Will she be okay?” You asked, your concern turning to the Captain you’d become friends with.

“Because of you, yes,” he nodded. “Look, Y/N, I don’t know if there’s a way for me to apologize for how hurtful my words were.”

“I understand the context of them, Doctor McCoy,” you said, slowly. “But in the moment, they were damning.” He rubbed the back of his neck, and looked at his feet.

“If you want the honest truth of it, you’re the best bambassabor I’ve ever had the pleasure of knowing. You seem incapable of any missteps. I hope you can accept my apology.” He looked you right in the eye and you could see the sincerity of his words. “I’d hate for my insufferable bedside manner to have compromised our friendship.”

“Well, you could start to make it up to me with a drink, Bones,” you suggested, softening. He smirked.

“I just happen to know where I can find a bottle of Scotch,” he suggested, finally letting go of your hand and pushing to his feet. “I mean it, Y/N. You’re a remarkable woman.”

Your eyes followed him as he headed off to retrieve the liquor he’d promised, and you realized you were falling hard for the cantankerous man. As temperamental as he was, he’d never shied away from admitting when he was in the wrong, which was more than you could say for many other officers. And he was so incredibly easy on the eyes.

“Well, shit,” you mumbled, shaking your head.

#trek fest 2017 #leonard bones mccoy #leonard mccoy #bones mccoy #leonard mccoy x reader #bones x reader #imagine star trek #star trek imagine

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witchymarvelspacecase · 8 years ago

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Excitement and Fear

Summary: My submission for @kaitymccoy123‘s Spring has Sprung Challenge: “His ego is so visible I can almost watch it grow.”

Jim Kirk x Reader (reader has a phobia)

Color: White: Innocence, light, fragility, the mug you sip coffee from in the morning, perfection, the moment before a kiss, fear, cleanliness, an untouched snow fall

Word Count: 2749

Warnings: teeny tiny bit of angst, bit of fluff, needle phobia, panic attack, transfusion, attack, confusion, a couple of swears (shocker)

A/N: thanks to @writingwithadinosaur for Beta reading for me again (and offering to do it again and again in the future). Go check her out, she’s amazing!

Posted: 5/22/17

Avoiding medbay had become a routine for you. Working in engineering usually meant quite a few trips to medical; exposure to radiation, millions of moving parts, and clumsy coworkers all combined to make for a generally dangerous work environment. But whether through skill, or sheer dumb luck, you’d avoided medical visits for a long time. Longer than was allowed actually, but no one had caught you yet.

It wasn’t that you were avoiding the people there; if Christine and Dr. McCoy had been in any other profession, you would have been happy to consider them friends, but you and doctors don’t mix at all. So when an opportunity for an away mission came up, you jumped for it. Not only would you get a chance at some non-recirculated air, but you could avoid Dr. McCoy, Nurse Chapel, and their incessant nagging as well. The mission was a simple scouting trip, so it should have been just a few science officers, someone from engineering, and a security officer. But the Captain had claimed that he needed to go on this mission. You were pretty sure that he just wanted to be off the ship and escape his responsibilities for a while, but you played along.

Jim was a friend, a partner in crime; he also understood your desire to avoid Dr. Hyper-hypo. He may not have understood the reason why, but he helped you anyway. He also avoided check-ups and physicals, for his own reasons. But it was still nice to have someone who bothered to understand, even just a little. The fact that you had a school-girl crush on him was sometimes hard for you to ignore, but hanging out with him as friends was good enough for you.

Waiting for Captain Kirk to get to the transporter, you chatted to your superior and friend, Scotty. He reminded you to check in when you landed and to keep an eye on Jim for him. You both had a good chuckle at that, knowing that sometimes Jim was prone to wander off. You were still giggling when he came into the room, followed closely by Dr. McCoy who, by the sound of it, was giving him a hard time about something.

“Jim, you can’t just walk off a concussion, it’s serious.”

“I know Bones, I know. Don’t worry about it. It’s just a hypothetical situation. Relax.”

“Hypothetical my ass. “ the doctor replied stepping to the side, “Still don’t understand why you’re even going.”

“Cause I am the Captain, and the team needs me. Hey Dust.” Jim acknowledged you, as he walked away to talk to Scotty.

“Dust” had been Jim’s name for you since he met you in your first astronomy class at the academy. “Dust” is short for “Stardust”. He insisted that since everyone is made of stardust and he met you when you were both studying stars, it was only a fitting name for you. You tried to act like you didn’t like it, but it warmed your heart a little every time he called you that.

“His ego is so visible I can almost watch it grow.” Dr. McCoy grumbled, now standing near you.

You laughed in true then; you couldn’t deny that. The doctor looked at you then, as if he hadn’t realized who it was that he was standing by.

“Don’t laugh too hard Y/N. I’m gonna get you into medical when you get back. You’re about a year overdue for just about everything.”

“You gotta catch me first Doc.” you sassed as you walked onto the transport pad.

“Ya know, you could use my name,” he sighed.

“At least I don’t call you ‘Bones’,” you smiled at him as you turned to face the room, ready to beam down. Jim cackled as your bodies began to transport.

You were so excited for the mission; beaming to the surface of an icy planet, not knowing what you’d find. Your first steps left footprints in the surrounding snow, they were the only marks you could see. A smile lit your face as the science officers started running scans of the area. You could hear trepidation in their voices, but you weren’t worried or afraid. Cautious, as you were expected to be, but not afraid.

Perhaps you should have been.

While the planet was uninhabited by any humanoid life forms, there were apparently several, very large, very aggressive life forms calling it home. Life forms that, when threatened by a Starfleet scouting party, like to swipe at said scouting party with their sharp claws and clubbed tails. Since you all were only equipped with phasers, beaming back to the ship was the only option. The problem with that was that the call wasn’t put through fast enough. Kirk hadn’t even finished saying Scotty’s name when the claws came at his head again. He ducked as did most of the others, except the youngest science officer. You pushed him out of the way just in time while firing off a miraculous shot, hitting the creature right in its eye. The creature howled in pain and ran off with one last swipe of its massive tail.

“Good shot Y/N,” Kirk cheered as he rolled to his feet, a proud grin on his face. That grin slid away as soon as he saw you though.

Although you had hit the creature, it had scored an equally good hit on you; three deep gouges, right across your torso, shoulder to hip.

You vaguely registered Kirk calling Scotty again, frantically telling him to alert McCoy that you were injured. You weren’t sure when your back had hit the ground, but you thought you felt a warm touch to your cheek. Then it was all black.

...

The bright lights of medbay were burning through your closed eyelids, irritating your already pounding head. You knew you were in medical without even opening your eyes. The smell of antiseptic, the soft whir of the bio-beds and, the angry sounding southern drawl of the local CMO where all the clues you needed.

“No Jim, she isn’t awake. … No, there hasn’t been a change since you checked 5 seconds ago. … Damn it man, I’m a doctor not a miracle worker; I can’t make her wake up.”

“Maybe you are a miracle worker Doc.” you replied, voice scratchy and rough from your unintended sleep, “You woke me up just fine.”

“I take it back, she says I may just be. She’s up. … No Jim, you may not. I just said- and he’s already headed down here.” McCoy added, speaking to no one now that Jim had elected to come down to medical, regardless of the CMO’s protests. You chuckled lightly at his antics, pushing yourself into a sitting position, instantly regretting it when you felt your chest and abdomen protest. You groaned and Dr. McCoy turned to you, tricorder in hand and began scanning you.

“You’re gonna be sore for a few weeks Y/N. You took a hard shot to the chest and knocked your head. Had to regenerate quite a bit of tissue and you needed a transfusion. There’s a lot of deep tissue bruising still. You’re gonna need to take it easy.”

You winced. “This is your way of telling me I’m gonna stuck here for a while isn’t it?”

“‘Fraid so. Unless you can convince someone else to watch you in your quarters instead,” he responded, adjusting your IVs.

Your heart rate spiked. Up until that moment you hadn’t noticed the IVs in your arms. You knew that the shunts in your arms were not technically needles, but your irrational fear didn’t discriminate. That was the reason you avoided medbay and the Hypo-happy doctor who called it home. You had an intense needle phobia. And now, you couldn’t escape.

In your panic, you’d missed the Captain entering medical to a scene of confusion. McCoy trying to calm you while simultaneously barking at his nurses to get a sedative for you. Jim crossed the room, perched himself on the edge of your bed and took your face in his hands.

“Y/N,” he said in a calm but commanding voice, his “captain” voice, “you need to calm down, Dust.”

Your panicked brain heard him and your wide eyes met his.

“Listen to my breathing okay? Listen and try to match your breathing to mine.” He took exaggeratedly loud, even breaths for several minutes, long enough for you to calm down a little and explain the source of your panic.

“Well shit darlin’, I wish I’d known that earlier, but it’s not like there’s much I could have done about it.” You understood that a transfusion required needles. Intellectually, you knew there was nothing to fear, especially from Dr. McCoy, he’d never been anything but nice to you, even accommodating your dislike for medbay most of the time. But even though you knew all these things, your phobia would not be ignored. Your momentary calm had snapped, and you were hyperventilating again, Jim tried to calm you down, but it was like his voice was lost to you. Also lost to you was Nurse Chapel and her hidden hypo of sedative. She stuck you before you could notice her. Within moments, you had passed out, falling forward, slumping into Jim’s arms. He gently repositioned you, laying you back into bed, and then brushed the hair out of your face.

“How long do the IVs have to be in Bones?”

“Not much longer. If everything checks out, we can pull them later today. We’ll just have to make sure she’s getting enough liquids and be careful that she doesn’t become dehydrated. I told her she’d probably have to stay in here, but with that level of a reaction to needles, it may not be best for her,” Bones blew out a breath and ran a hand through his hair, looking at you back.

“What needs to happen?” Bones’ eyes darted to Jim when he spoke, brow furrowing for a moment before his face relaxed and he smiled slightly. He was surprised that Jim was so involved, but when he saw his friend’s determined face, he understood.

...

When you woke next, you were no longer in medbay, but swaddled in blankets in a room that was not your own. Blinking a few times to clear your eyes, you began to push yourself up, only to be stopped by a hand on your shoulder.

“Whoa, Y/N, lay back down,” Jim’s concerned face floated into your view. You grew more confused.

“Where am I? Whose…” you trailed off as you remembered; the mission, getting struck, medbay, your panic. Your eyes flew to Jim’s sea blue ones, shame and discomfort building, you looked away and down.

“First of all,” Jim spoke soothingly and used his thumb and forefinger to lift your chin so he could see your face again, “there’s no reason for you to be embarrassed; we all have fears. So yours is inconvenient; they all are, really. We were just surprised. We don’t judge you for a fear you can’t control. Bones says he can find ways to work around it. Honestly, I think he’s just glad you weren’t avoiding him cause you didn’t like him, he has a fragile ego ya know.” You smiled a little at that, remembering McCoy’s comment about Jim’s ego.

“Second, to answer your question, you are in my room. Bones said you needed someone to watch you if you left medbay. I volunteered, so we are in my room,” Jim paused, he hadn’t even considered taking you to your own room, he’d just taken you straight to his. Now he was questioning his impulse, “would you rather be in yours? We can move if you want.” You blinked a few times and tilted your head causing Jim’s fingers to leave your chin, he rested them instead on your upturned cheek. He’d volunteered? Your brow furrowed again; Jim chuckled.

“You’re wondering why I volunteered aren’t you?”

“Yep. You have way more important shit to be doing than babysitting an invalid, Jim. You have a whole ship depending on you.”

“Are you not a part of the ship Y/N?”

“Well yeah but-”

“And you need help right?”

“I do not nee-”

“Yes, you do. So this could be considered an extension of my duties really, but it’s not.” Jim’s hand stayed on your cheek, but he brought himself more fully into your view, now sitting perched on the bed as opposed to on the ground leaning over you as he’d been before.

“If it’s not duty, then why are you doing this Jim?” you asked, eyes looking back and forth between his, confused, but still… why would he be here, touching you, let alone spending so much time with you if he didn’t feel… No, you decided, closing your eyes and trying to turn your face away, but Jim countered; moving his other hand up to cup your other cheek, effectively forcing you to look at him.

“Why? Because I care about you, Y/N. I’ve always cared about you, probably more than I should have. We’ve always been close I know, but when I saw you hurt… Stardust, you passed out and I tried to catch you when you fell, but I was too far away. My heart was racing when I ran to you, and it almost stopped when you wouldn’t wake up. I got to you and you wouldn’t respond. I was so scared. You lost so much blood, Dust,” Jim’s eyes closed and he pressed his forehead to yours. You reached up and held his wrists in your hands, trying to comfort him. You could only remember how you felt during the Khan incident, when Jim had climbed into the warp core housing to save the ship, and died in the process; you had been shattered. Looking at Jim, you knew he understood that feeling now.

“I’m here. I’m here, and I’m okay. You got me back to the ship in time. McCoy fixed me up, and if I hadn’t seen the IVs, I would have been fine.” You moved your right hand from his wrist to his cheek, he nuzzled into your palm.

You both stayed like that for a moment before Jim moved. He removed his left hand to grasp your right, holding it to his cheek as he spoke.

“I’m here, helping you because I want to. I want to be with you as much as I can. I want to be there when you wake up, as you fall asleep, and every moment in between. I… I love you, Y/N. I love you so much.” His eyes were still closed, his head still leaning on yours. He looked so vulnerable, you weren’t used to this side of him.

You thought you had seen everything from him; funny, angry, melancholy, happy, studious (albeit rarely). But this? This was new. Love. You did love him, had for a while, but pushed it back through everything. He needed you as a friend. You’d been there through Nero, Kahn, and the death of Christopher Pike. Hell you’d been there when he had died. Most recently, you’d been there when he was doubting himself, and thinking of leaving the ship, during Krall’s terror. He’d never indicated his feelings, at least not that you’d noticed. But then again, he clearly didn’t know how you felt either.

“Ya know, life would be so much easier if we all just talked about our damn feelings,” you groused, startling Jim into lifting his head from yours, almost pulling away from your hand and looking straight at you.

“I’ve loved you for a long time, you idiot.” You smiled at his relieved sigh. His whole body relaxed, his head dropping back down to meet yours, a small chuckle falling from his lips.

“Yeah, it would be easier. But I’m saying it now, and I’ll say it for as long as you’ll let me: I love you, Dust.” He began to lean forward a bit more, his eyes looking to your lips, you smiled as the hand you had on his cheek slid to the back of his neck and up into his hair. But before you felt the press of lips against yours, the door opened and a very loud, southern voice came from the doorway.

“How’s our patient doing to-- Damn it Jim! I told you to watch her, not hit on her!” Jim groaned, you laughed so hard your abdomen and chest burned.

Permanent Tags:

@buckyappreciationsociety, @17marvelousfreak @enterprisewriting @melconnor2007 @feelmyroarrrr @addictionmarvel @writingwithadinosaur @whenallsaidanddone @hello-sweetie-get-the-salt @umwhatandrea @pineapplebooboo

#springhassprungchallenge #jim kirk #star trek aos #jim kirk x reader

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justanotherangryartist-blog · 8 years ago

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Everything wrong with me.

hold on to your seats folks, this is gonna be a hell of a list.

disclaimer: I don't promote self hate, I'm merely trying to come to terms with my own issues. if you feel anything like I do, I suggest you seek out professional help, tell your loved ones and hold on. they say it gets better and for your sake I hope it does. be strong everyone.

......

so lets get right into it shall we

ill start by saying these are both mental and physical flaws I have that have dragged me down and I feel that if I say them out loud, or even type them, it'll hopefully hit home cuz lord knows I need a right kick up the ass right now

1. I'm impatient.

let me clarify this, I know it seems pretty easy to get but bare with me. I mean impatient in both the normal sense that I hate things taking time and in the way that the worse my depression gets the more I want instantaneous results, I make fictional plans in my head with very precise deadlines and time frames in which to get certain tasks done. if they don't happen I get very upset even though these are fictional situations I am imagining. I also cant make myself do things in actual life if it falls out of what I call the “ideal time” which basically means if its not initiated or done all together within a certain time frame? its not getting done at all, like ever.

2. I have an addictive personality.

yeah, we all know this can be bad, even those of us with it but we somehow manage to full people into thinking we got it under control, that we are just passionate. which is total bollox and we know it. for example, I get addicted to people, which is a huge problem as I tend to put them on a pedestal and when they don't live up to this or do something bad or cruel, instead of getting mad then moving on, my whole world with crumble, because at the time, they would've been my world. it doesn't just end there. I never really let go.

3. I’ve got a gambling problem.

this is both in the lottery, scratch card and such kinda way and the more dangerous way of ill gamble with things such as people and relationships. I just had to delete the lottery app from my phone just before I started writing this post because I know how bad its getting, I wasted money that I should've been saving since I'm out of work on lottery games cuz the mere tiny chance that I could win money and make my situation better was worth it in my eyes. I even stole money from my ten year old brothers piggy bank when I had no money in my account to bet and I had to go to the shop to buy a lottery ticket. the worst part is I had no remorse or regret at the time. I also gamble with relationships I've had, pushing boundaries just to feel the high, flipping the metaphorical coin to see if I'm gonna get lucky or not and continuing to flip it till its all gone to ruin.

4. I eat away my pain.

I'm severely obese for my age and the only reason I can still move is because of my fondness of walking. I gorge on food to stop the thoughts in my head. the easiest way to explain it is when you're watching TV and eating crisps and you have to pause the TV cuz you cant hear it over the sound of the crunch of the crisps. its deafening. the more I eat, the less I hear the thoughts coursing through my mind telling me how much of a failure I am. the more weight I gain the more withdrawn I get, the less I change out of pyjamas because nothing fits, the less I wash or put on makeup or do anything because giving a shit means excepting what's happened and what people see.

5. I overshare.

not just my problems, but everything. infact I tend to warp my own problems somehow when I talk about them so they don't seem so bad and then I drown out my own concerns and others peoples lack of understanding by just chatting to fill the silence. people hate it. or atleast that's the vibe they give off. even my parents, always asking if I'm done yet or why I didn't use up all my words during the day. I just cant stop. the more people don't get what I'm trying to say (which is a lot cuz I never really know how to talk about my actual emotions) the more I talk rubbish. then theres times when I'm talking about something that makes me happy to the point of excess and I just get so mad because nobody understands that the only reason I'm doing so is this is the only way I know how to put emphasis on “ok this makes me happy, be happy that I'm happy, help replicate this feeling”. I hate that I'm like this.

6. I don't know how to tell people how I'm feeling.

I hide behind my sense of humour a lot because I just don't know how to explain why I feel the way I feel, like the world makes no sense why my emotions change so rapidly, why I'm scared to sleep in my on room anymore why I avoid talking about the future because I live minute to minute not knowing what the next hour brings but if you say these things people just get upset and say things like “are you taking your medication?” “why don't you just talk to someone?” “why don't you try x, y and z” when all I want is someone to sit there, understand me and be like “I get it, and here's what WE ARE going to do and then you will be better. it doesn't work like that though, so I don't say anything, because what's the point of voicing a problem if you don't have a solution right? then you just sound depressed and no one wants to hear that.

7. I lose faith in my own ability. a lot.

I normally like to think I'm a good artist, that I'm great at makeup, that I'm good with children, that I'm a good listener, that I'm a good writer, that I'm wise that I'm smart that I'm clever. I don't think that much anymore. see a seed of doubt was planted in my mind and my issue was I was the one that let it grow. I lost my mojo with my art because nowadays I do it in hopes I can sell my pieces online to pay something off, this fact then triggers a chain reaction that leads to me doubting its selling potential, that my works not good enough at all, that being commercial would kill my talent, that I have no talent at all, that all my works shit and then all I can think about is painting USED to make me feel good. now its tainted by thoughts about my lack of talent, my lack of commercial value, and the fact that a moment spent painting is a moment that that house isn't getting cleaned and the bills aren't getting paid.

8. I'm scared of everything.

everything these days sends me into a panic. noises, debts, responsibility, the way people look or talk to me, anything and everything. its like everything's new and horrible again, I'm having to re learn how to go outside my own house and how to talk on the phone because everything's so terrifying. noises upset me because they signify life going on around me at an alarming pace and I just cant calm down with everything so loud in my ear its deafening, cant you hear it? even now as I write this I find myself rocking on my seat as I try to calm myself down. my minds so loud that even turn my head feels like whiplash, like everything's to fast and the only way I know how to cure it is to shut it off to shut it all off. it cant touch me if I don't move. life cant find me if I'm sleeping.

9. I sleep too much.

sleep is putting it lightly. what I really mean is I shut down a lot. it works for computers right? have you tried turning it on and off again? how many times before it reboots, I silently wonder if ill ever reboot or if they'll have to take me in and get my parts replaced. I silently hope they do. I mean how many times have you taken a broken laptop or ipod in to discover its go a broken screen or keypad or memory and you're gonna have to fork out a lot of money to fix that single component only for another component to break a month later, how many times have you just bought a new laptop, secretly happy that you don't have to deal with the damaged one anymore. I sleep to fix my single component knowing full well my batteries gonna go out soon anyway. wont someone just buy a new one of me?

10. I'm a bitter person.

I should mention the importance of the present tense. I'm not becoming, I'm already here, but the thing is ive not always been bitter either. I used to be happy, bit fat, bit emotional but happy. I prided myself on the fact I could make people laugh and I would get upset at myself if someone thought I was anything less than happy, because then they weren't happy. now I don't give two shits. ive become bitter, angry, selfish and cold. id say all I care about is myself but I don't even care about me. I'm angry that the world continues on without me fully present, I hate the fact that I hate myself and that I don't look good, that I'm not healthy. I fear no one will love me or truly connect with me and so ive become a recluse to the point that even when I do go out I seldom have anything to really talk about except for how unhappy I am. I see very little hope on the horizon, the few moments I have are in my own head usually, which just adds to my bitterness for not being able to properly enjoy reality. every interaction I have is tainted with bitterness over trying to enjoy myself in the first place when there is so much wrong in my life. I hate who I have become.

IN SHORT.... I HATE MYSELF.

its kind of poetic that as I finished that sentence the sun came out and the warmth hit me right through the window. I find myself almost smiling, breathing evenly as I type, almost happy to get it off my chest. to admit that I hate myself? its actually a relief, because now I can try to work towards doing something about it. I'm not naïve enough to think this'll solve everything, I know there will be days where I continue to hate myself and try to self sabotage my own efforts to get better. I'm not stupid enough to tell you guys that I have a plan of action because as a person who lives for instruction, I can tell you I have no clue what I'm gonna do to get better, and I wont leave you (if anyone actually does read this) thinking that it gets better instantly. see what I mean about the bitterness? but I will say this, I am secure and resolute in the fact that I don't like who I am, I am resolute in the fact that I don't have an immediate solution, but this doesn't mean I wont try to find one. could take days, could take months, could go one direction then stop and turn back, it doesn't matter because in accepting that there's something wrong I have only one direction to go in.

May anyone else struggling with these issues find the strength to accept your flaws and begin your road to recovery, or atleast take the exit for recovery and maybe stop at a pitstop for a while before heading on down that route, I aint gonna judge. Ill see you there.

#deppression #self harm #suicide #self image #self hatred #recovery #help #healing #trigger warning #bitter #fat #angry #sad #anxious #anxiety #depressed #hate #how to hate yourself

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television-romantic · 8 years ago

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Windows to the Soul

Title: Windows to the Soul

Characters: Cas x Reader, Dean, Sam

Summary: Reader runs away and is on the verge of death. When an angel comes and saves her.

Warnings: None? Cursing maybe? Almost death? Lots of medical stuff though…

Word Count: About 2,000

A/N: Hi! This is my first Cas x Reader fic and will probably be a bit of a slow burn. I’m kinda new to this so be kind! Feedback is always appreciated!

Prologue

Cold, so fucking cold. There is snow everywhere, falling from the sky, on the streets, almost completely covering the sidewalk till it’s basically a hill. Despite me being completely decked out in winter gear. I’m freezing my fucking tits off. Why out of all days did I decide to leave when it started to snow?

You know why.

Trapped, I felt trapped in that fucking house. Sure, I had everything I could ever want in that house. Movie theater, Gourmet food, Huge garden, Rooms filled with books. That’s right rooms, as in more than one. I had everything. Except…

What? Except fucking company? You think you deserve friends? Love? You do realize you’re risking your life for it right now. Just for a-

“Shut up!” I yell, startling the pedestrians around me. “Dammit, great now we have people staring! You happy?”

Very, now you can just turn around back to the house. That, or you can keep walking and talking to yourself until someone calls the cops. Your choice, sweetie.

“You know we’re way too far from the house to just walk back and-”

Call him then!

“No fucking way!” I mutter, now trying to find the nearest and warmest spot. I just need to lie down…Just for a second.

No! You can’t sleep. Do you know the last time you ate? Two days! That and plus all this walking…You’ll die. And did you not realize why all of a sudden I’m here? Your body is going to overdrive. I’m the last resort, Y/N, you need to call hi-

“I’ll be fine!” I interrupt, walking over to an seemingly safe alleyway. By safe, I mean empty. “You heard what god said, an angel will be there for me when I need him most.” I say with smirk, not entirely believing it myself.

Yeah right! And when’s the last time anybody was there for us?

“Crowley…” I mutter, my smile growing bigger, remembering the incident.

Exactly! That’s why you need to call him! Now, Preferably!

I settle down against the brick wall behind some abandoned cardboard box. So sleepy…

“You know he won’t understand why I’m doing this. He’ll just stick me back at that houssssse…” I mumble, my words becoming slurred.

Y/N!

“Mmm, just a quick nap..”

Stop, wake up! If you go down so do I, you know this!

“Well maybe that will shut you up once and for-”

Y/N? Y/N! Wake-

Silence, Darkness, Nothing. Finally, I’m at Peace! It’s been so long… Wait, what’s that? God? It’s so bright… I see a figure, it’s walking towards me… Stop, please tell me it’s not time! I’m not ready. It comes closer. I had so much I wanted to do. Closer. I’m not strong enough yet! I won’t be able to defeat hi-

My eyes snap open and I’m greeted by bright blue ones. It belongs to a man. He looks so pretty… His scruff, his soft pink lips, his jaw line… But it’s his eyes. They’re so blue, like the sky on a perfect day, so full of…something? Wisdom? Hope? Love? How can someone look so beautiful and so perfect? An angel, maybe? It’s my angel! God was right! He has come!

I reach to touch his face. My arm suddenly feeling heavier than usual. I wish I could feel his scruff through these gloves. But even with them off it’ll just feel numb from the cold… He looks at me with his eyes full of questions and worry. I smile weakly at him trying to reassure him. “My Angel, don’t worry.” I mumble, my voice hoarse, how long have I been out? “You have come to save me, right?” Before I can hear an answer from my angel, I hear a loud shrill sound, and my vision goes dark.

The last thing I hear is her

Heh…guess you were right…this time.

Chapter 1

Today was like any other day in the bunker. There was no new cases. Sam just got back from shopping for tonight’s dinner. Dean just finished cleaning the impala from the last road trip. And right now they were both sitting down and binge-watching Jessica Jones. Today was supposed to be like any other day.

“Dean, Sam!” A gruff voice calls out. They turn around and see Cas, holding a girl in his arms…

Dean and Sam immediately get up and run up to Cas. “Wha-What happened? Who is she?” Dean moves closer to the girl cas is holding, inspecting her for injuries.

“Put her on the couch,” Sam says before running to the first-aid in the bathroom.

“She was in a alleyway in Colorado,” Cas says, walking briskly to the couch and setting her down. ”She was freezing, frost was forming on her face, she was turning blue.”

“And why were you in Colorado?” Dean grunts, gathering all the blankets around the room.

Sam comes back with the first aid and sets it down next to the couch. He inspects her face again before kneeling down beside her and unzipping her jacket.

“What are you doing?” Cas moves closer to Sam in almost a defensive stance.

“She’s cold Cas,” Sam sighs and continues undressing her. “Wearing wet, snow, and ice covered clothes isn’t helping her.” After he finishes the outer-layer of clothes and is done checking her arms and legs for injuries, he towards Dean, who has a pile of blankets in his hands. He takes the blankets and quickly lays a couple over her. “Clothes,” He mutters towards Dean, “Get thick clothes.” Dean runs towards one of the bedrooms grabbing as many sweaters and sweats that she could wear. Cas, on the other hand, is still standing there next to Sam and the girl. Looking distressed as ever.

“I-I couldn’t heal her…she has some sort of protective…thing” He mutters. Sam pauses briefly before, setting a throw pillow under her head.

“Cas, why were you in Colorado?” Sam mutters, looking up at Cas.

But before Cas can answer Dean runs in with a pile of clothes. “She Okay?” Dean says, handing over the clothes to Sam.

Sam takes the clothes and sets them down next to him. He then, reaches under the blanket were the girl is lying and starts to remove her clothes without looking. He feels her stomach and notices how easily he can feel her ribs. He looks back up at her face and realizes how sunken in it is as well.

He sighs and removes his hand from under the blanket, “She could be worse, but she’s malnourished and probably dehydrated.” He looks up at Cas and at Dean, deciding who to call on. He settles his eyes back on Cas, “Cas, go to a hospital and go get IV bags and one Parenteral nutrition bag.” And like that Cas is gone in a flash.

Sam starts to redress her with the clothes Dean gave him, obviously without looking. Meanwhile, Dean is rummaging through the first aid, gathering all the needles and tubes he can find. By the time the both finish, Cas is back with arms full of IV bags and One milky looking bag, probably the Parenteral bag. After Dean finds all the supplies he stands up and grabs the bags from Cas and sets them down by Sam along with the needles and and tubes.

“We also need the-”

“IV Pole, on it,” Dean interrupts, running the down the hall and to the bathroom.

Sam grabs the girl’s arm to put outside the blanket, then starts to set up the IVs. Cas watches with a worried look. God, he feels so useless right now. He’s a freaking angel and all he can do is watch! ‘Why couldn’t I use my grace? Why of all angels did he think I could do it?’

“Cas!” Sam calls out again, trying to get his attention. Clearly annoyed at this point.

“Y-yes? Sorry.” Cas stutters out, getting to ready to go to wherever Sam needs him to go this time.

Sam sighs, “I’m asking you why you were in Colorado?”

“Oh, Right. About that. Well-” But, before Cas can explain Dean is running back in wheeling in a pole with wheels and hooks on the top.

“Got it!” Dean calls out grabbing the IV bag that Sam had set up and is now needled into the girl’s arm. Sam, takes the girl’s arm and grabs tape from the Med kit so the needle doesn’t come out of her arm. Dean hooks the IV bag to the pole and turns a knob on the tube leading to the girl’s arm. The clear liquid starts to drip out into the girl’s arm. The girl show no reaction, still sleeping quietly, as if nothing was happening to her.

Sam takes out a small flashlight from the Med kit and turns it on. Lifting up the girl’s eyelids open he checks for any bad signs. He’s greeted with Y/E/C slightly rolled back, but her pupils slightly growing smaller from the light. Nothing bad, thank god.

“You didn’t answer my question Cas.” Sam muttered, setting the girl’s arm down and tucking it under the blanket.

“Is she gonna be okay?” Cas asks worriedly, clearly ignoring Sam’s question.

Sam sighs annoyed by Cas trying to avoid the question, “Yes, she should be at least…It depends if she wakes up. Which is why I asked for that Nutrition bag. She might slip into a coma if she doesn’t wake up soon to eat.”

“Why can’t we wake her up yet?” Dean asks with the same worried voice as Cas.

“I-I honestly don’t know,” Sam says, running his hand through his hair frustratingly. “I mean, if she could she probably be awake, especially after sticking a needle in her. But by looking into her eyes she shows no signs of being in a coma.” or being dead.

A sigh of relief washes over both Dean and Cas as they slump back into arm chairs on either side of the couch. Who knew Dean would have to spend his day off trying to save some strange girl from dying. Why was she here anyway? And why couldn’t she wake up?

“God, he told me she would be there,” Cas pipes up, before anybody could ask for the 5th time. Dean and Sam look at him with shock as well as some other emotion they can’t quite point out yet themselves.

“You mean-”

“The God,” Dean interrupts, “As in Chuck? The one who is supposedly with his sister? He told you that a strange girl was in an alleyway? And you just went and saved her?”

“What was I supposed to do Dean?” Cas sounding more annoyed and exhausted at this point. “Leave her? Obviously she has to be of some sort of importance. And by the look of her being immune to my powers, she kinda is.” Cas huffs sinking further into the chair.

“But he didn’t like, tell you anything about her?” Sam says, finally finding a way to enter the conversation.

“No, he just said that there was a girl that need my help and that ‘by his command, I must protect by however means necessary.’ “ Cas mutters, using air quotes as emphasis.

“Great, I just love it when people ask vague and somewhat threatening favors from us!” Dean sarcastically chimes, followed by a groan and him going back to drinking his beer from the stand next to the chair.

Sam just sighs and turns back to looking at the girl. Color starting to form back to her cheeks and her breathing even and almost relaxing Sam. “Well at least we know she can’t be someone bad.” Sam sighs again, reaching over and moving hair out of the girl’s hair.

Then all of a sudden the girl starts to groan and shift, startling all the boys into standing back up. She groans again, louder, as if she’s saying something.

“Crowley…” She mutters her hand trying to move up as if grabbing something. “Crowley!” She repeats, then as if something was there, her hand closes and goes back down. Then she relaxes again into her sleep as if nothing happened.

The boys just stare in shock at the girl, then at each other, then back at the girl.

“What did you say about her being bad?” mutters Dean.

Part 2 Coming soon!

#dean whinchester #sam whinchester #castiel #cas #cas x reader #reader x cas #castiel x reader #reader x castiel #supernatural #windows to the soul #series

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