#if it feels like i repeat ingredients a lot it's cause i do

[feralbnuuy]

I'm literally such boywife material like look at the meals I've made

[pseudophan]

PHANNIE COOKBOOK SIGN-UPS!!

Do you have a really good recipe you think Dan and Phil would enjoy? Consider submitting it to this collaborative phannie cookbook that will be given to DnP at a meet & greet! It will also be available to everyone to download as a PDF.

Family recipes or your favourite dish from your country/culture is a bonus, but it doesn’t have to be that personal. All I ask is that you don’t go rip something random off the Internet right now just to be in the book, I want food you genuinely enjoy!

I’ve decided the most efficient way of doing this is to let you submit up to 3 different options, that way if there are any repeats (and I’m certain there will be) I won’t have to message everyone it concerns to ask if you have any alternatives. Besides, that way I can choose which version gets in based on your other options rather than which one “sounds better” to me, cause I think that would be a little unfair. I also have no idea how many people will actually participate in this yet, which is currently the biggest hurdle in terms of planning. If only a few sign up there is a chance we’ll end up using multiple recipes by some, and if somehow we get too many I’ll have to pick and choose. I do really want to include as many people as possible, but until I actually see the recipes it’s hard to tell what will end up happening.

The main focus of this will be actual food, but we obviously need to include a few desserts, so feel free to submit those as well just be aware the chances of those getting picked might be lower. The same goes for soups, I assume a lot of people have soup recipes and we might include a couple, but for obvious reasons it's a low priority.

Some key things to keep in mind:

Phil is a bit picky and has some dietary restrictions! He shouldn’t have dairy or chocolate and he doesn’t like cheese or mushrooms, among other things. That doesn’t mean you have to avoid these things entirely, but maybe your grandma’s mac and cheese recipe isn’t the best choice

While neither of them is vegan they do eat a lot of vegan food, so we definitely need some vegan dishes. I also think it would be really great if you suggested vegetarian and/or vegan substitutions you know work well with your recipe! That isn’t a must for every dish, but it’s a nice addition where possible

Tragically, Dan and Phil are British, meaning they won’t necessarily have access to all the same ingredients as you. Luckily they are also rich and live in a major city with a lot of options so they aren’t limited to what they can find at their local Tesco, but since the aim of this book is to encourage them to cook we probably shouldn’t be sending them on a scavenger hunt either. I don’t think this will be a huge issue, but if your recipe calls for something you think might be very niche or local to you it might be worth googling it or asking around

The final book will be using UK measurements, but if your recipe doesn’t then don’t even worry about it for now. We’ll get to that later. You also don’t have to worry about typing out the whole step-by-step in detail in the sign-up form, I just need a list of the ingredients and roughly how to prepare it to gauge whether it’s a good fit.

I promise I’m almost done yapping but lastly, about some of the questions on the form - you don’t need to know exactly how long the dish takes to prepare, that will depend on the person or people making it anyway, but we do need a rough estimate. The difficulty level is obviously quite subjective, but I just want to hear how you personally would rank it, and if there is a specific part of the process you think someone who doesn’t cook a lot might struggle with. As for the last question about photos, I’m asking both if you have the time and opportunity to make the food and if you are able to take a good photo of it. Obviously it doesn’t have to be anything professional, a phone camera is fine, it just needs to be well lit and decent quality.

Okay, I think that’s everything-

Here's the sign-up form

The deadline is in a week, at midnight Thursday to Friday CET :)

(I also made a blog for this @phookbook for information and updates! A lot of it will probably still be on this blog, but I'll try to post/reblog the most important things on there for those who want to keep up with everything but who may not want to deal with all the chaos of pseudophan)

[hayakawalove]

I'll Get My Way

Summary: Suguru wants to punish you for being a brat, but Satoru has other plans.

A/N: I need them both to fuck me up. I thought I posted this here already, but I can't find it anywhere. More poly Satosugu for you guys.

TW: Brat taming, Cunnilingus, Sex Toys, Anal Sex, Anal Fingering, Gay Sex, Dacryphilia, Teasing, Oral Sex, Polyamory, D/S Dynamics, Female Reader, AFAB reader, Praise Kink, Vaginal Penetration

W/C: 5,326

Most of the time, you never caused trouble. Causing trouble was something reserved for Satoru. Suguru was grateful for it. He didn’t think he could handle two trouble makers if he was being honest. It was hard enough to keep a tight leash on Satoru, there was no way he could keep you in line as well.

That didn’t mean you never acted out, though. Most of the time you were Suguru’s angel. His princess. Key word being: most of the time. And it so happened this week you decided you wanted to rebel. 

It all started with grocery shopping at the beginning of the week. Suguru believed it was an honest mistake, really. He sent you out to pick up specific things for dinner. There was even a list clutched tightly in your hands when you left. He didn’t need a lot for the recipe as you already had some of it at home. But there were key ingredients written down that he did need. Ground beef, garlic, eggs, among other things. It was a dinner Suguru had been waiting to try for a long time, and he was really excited to see what your and Satoru’s reactions would be. Except when you came home you didn’t have ground beef, garlic, or eggs. You didn’t have anything on the list in fact. The bags were filled with random food items that looked good to you around the store. Definitely not something Suguru could make into a decent dinner. 

It was an honest mistake, he was sure of it. But the second you saw his eye twitch, there was something that went off in your eyes. It was like the brat inside you was suddenly awoken after being dormant for so long. 

You began to see how much you could get away with before he snapped. Your next stunt was directed towards Satoru. 

The two men had gone out for the day and Satoru was beginning to get antsy. He got like that if he didn’t have his usual amount of sugar. Lucky for him, there was one piece of chocolate cake waiting for him at home. Satoru whipped the door open and saw you sitting on the couch, the only remnants of his cake was frosting that laid on your lips. 

After Satoru had a melt down, Suguru caught your eye and he noticed a gleam in it. Daring him to do something. He decided it would be more torture for you if he didn’t do anything, so that was his plan. 

That was his plan, at least. The final nail in the coffin happened on a bright Saturday afternoon. It was cleaning day for everyone, but you were nowhere in sight. Suguru noticed the sink full of dishes and the unmopped floor and he let out a sigh. He looked everywhere in the house, and finally found you spread out on the bed. Your phone was in your hand while you idly scrolled. 

Suguru stops in the room and breathes out your name. 

Your eyes flick up then return to your screen. 

“Why aren’t you cleaning?” 

You adjust yourself on the bed. 

“Didn't feel like it.” 

Suguru felt heat begin to radiate through his body. He wasn’t really mad at you, but every time you or Satoru was defiant just for the sake of it, he could feel every hair on his body stand on edge. 

“Didn't feel like it?” He repeats and you nod lazily. 

Before you can do anything else on your phone you feel a large warm hand wrap around your ankle, yanking you down the bed. You let out a yelp, your phone flying away from you. 

The reaction you were looking for all week was right in front of you. Suguru leans over the bed, one of your ankles tightly in his grasp. His brows furrow in concentration, his eyes dancing across your face. You feel your skin break out in goosebumps, a low roll of excitement burning in your stomach. 

“That’s what I said.” You counter, not backing down from his eyes, no matter how much your brain begged you to. 

Suguru grabs ahold of your chin and you feel your stomach drop. He stares you down waiting for you to waver but you never do. 

“You’ve been a brat lately.”

“Have I?” 

Your lips twitch in a small smile. Suguru leans down closer to your face, towering over you. You couldn’t escape even if you wanted to. Black bangs fall down, careful caressing your face. His eyes drop to your lips and back up. Sometimes it was scary not knowing what was going through Suguru’s head. For the most part it never bothered you, but he could be so calculating. His lips lightly trace over yours, not pressing down hard enough to be considered a kiss. 

“You know what happens to brats, don’t you?” 

You spread your legs inviting him in. His hand slides down, guiding down your body. You can already feel the desire for him begin to pool in your stomach. 

“No, what happens?” You say. 

Suguru’s hand lands itself in between your legs, his palm pressing down over your shorts. If you wiggle your hips just right, you can feel it relieve some of your ache. 

He listens as you try to press up into him harder, a pathetic sight. 

He tears his hand away and looks up to see your reaction. He can see a quick flash of desperation cross your face before it quickly leaves. 

“Okay.” You try to play it off. 

He knows you want a reaction. You want him to punish you. Lose control. But brats don’t get what they want, do they? 

Suguru stands up and leaves, leaving you laying dazed and confused on the bed. He comes back shortly though, with your other boyfriend dragging beside him. 

“Suguru! I was-“ Satoru complains but instantly gets cut off. 

Suguru pulls him to the front of the bed and smashes his lips against Satoru’s. Satoru moans softly and stiffens up, before melting into the touch and reaching out to hold Suguru. 

You can’t pull your eyes away. The view in front of you was irresistible. Their lips were locked, hard bodies pressed against each other. Tongues tangle together and you can faintly hear Satoru panting. You weren’t sure what Suguru was getting at, but you couldn’t complain at the view. 

Satoru reaches a hand out blindly, grabbing around until he reaches around your ankle. It was sweet, you thought. Satoru always did something like that when he was getting attention from Suguru. He never wanted you to feel left out. 

You lean into his touch, your body filling up with need. Suguru reaches out and pulls Satoru’s hand back from your leg, interlocking his fingers with Satoru and pulling both of their hands to their bodies. 

Before Satoru can question anything, Suguru breaks the kiss. Their foreheads touch while looking into each other's eyes. 

“Don’t you think she’s been a bad girl lately?” Suguru murmurs, just loud enough for you to hear. 

Satoru’s eyes flick over to yours briefly before colliding with Suguru’s once more. 

“She has, hasn’t she?” 

You feel your heart drop. Usually Satoru was defiant, never one to jump on the bandwagon. It was bad enough when Suguru punished you, but when it was both of them it was insurmountable. They worked in tandem so well, always leaving you dizzy. 

Suguru hums, his lips brushing against Satoru. If you weren’t eyeing them so closely, you would’ve missed the shiver than ran up Satoru’s spine. 

“I’m thinking maybe she should sit this one out.” Suguru continues. 

Satoru pulls his head back and turns it to look fully at you. You weren’t aware of how desperate you already looked. Hair a mess from being dragged across the sheets, wide eyes, and a heaving chest. 

“Don’t you agree, Satoru?” Suguru says. 

The way Suguru says Satoru’s name makes your mind blank. It was filled with so much lust, you could barely take it. 

Satoru cracks a grin, his eyes slowly tracing your figure. He turns back toward Suguru and nods, pressing his lips against his once more. 

You want to pout and complain but you knew they wouldn’t pay any attention to you. Once they both put their mind to something, all you could do was enjoy the ride. 

Satoru was more ravenous this second time around. His hands frantically pull Suguru closer to his body. Satoru presses a hand against his cheek while the other winds tightly against his waist. Suguru tangles his fingers in Satoru’s hair while the other hand slides down his body. 

The room felt increasingly hot and all you could do was wriggle on the bed, impatient and needy. 

Soft moans fill the room along with lips smacking. Your mouth felt dry as you watched them. Your hips wiggle from side to side subconsciously. You had two of the most beautiful men in front of you and it left you breathless. They rip each other's shirts off, pressing their toned bodies together. Suguru’s nipple piercings drag against Satoru’s body, and you can see Satoru’s brows furrow in response, his body shuddering in pleasure. 

Satoru’s hand trails down and unbuckles Suguru’s pants. The two quickly shove the garment down, allowing Suguru’s cock to jump free. The sight made your mouth water. Not only were their faces beautiful and their bodies irresistible, their cocks were something sculpted by the gods themselves, you were sure of it. Your hands shook with the need to reach out. 

Satoru tries to pull away from the kiss, Suguru’s lips following his. His teeth latch onto Satoru’s bottom lip, pulling it before letting go. Satoru groans, opening his eyes to reveal a hazy look. 

He looks up at Suguru while sinking to his knees. Your eyes follow his body, watching his hands roam Suguru’s legs and stomach. 

“You gonna play nice today?” Suguru questions, idly running his hand through Satoru’s hair. 

“Figured I might give it a try for once.” Satoru says. 

His tongue sticks out, laying flat against Suguru’s tip. You liked watching Satoru give Suguru head. He was really good at it. It made you think about what their sex life might’ve been like before you. 

Satoru stares up at Suguru while licking his cock. His hands drag up Suguru’s body, running past Suguru’s belly ring. He grabs onto his waist and pulls him in closer to his mouth. 

Satoru wraps his lips around the head of Suguru’s cock, slowly taking in more. Suguru’s breath hitches as he watches his cock envelope into Satoru’s warm mouth. It only takes him several seconds before Satoru’s nose is buried deep in Suguru’s pelvis. If the light caught perfectly, you could see the spit shining on Satoru’s chin. 

Neither paid you any mind, your heavy breathing going unnoticed or ignored. Your legs shuffled against each other, your elbows propping you up. 

If they wanted to, they could go at it for hours like this. You weren’t sure how evil they were feeling today. 

Satoru groans, feeling Suguru’s cock hit the back of his throat. He gags a little before pulling back, all the while his tongue strokes against Suguru’s cock. 

“Okay guys, I get it, you can s-“ You begin. 

Your words die in your throat once you see Satoru’s lips release Suguru completely. Strings of spit connect the two, a sight so lewd you thought you might’ve died and gone to heaven. 

Satoru looks at you from the corner of his eyes, your dazed gaze locked on his mouth and Suguru’s cock. He tries to suppress a smile. The two of them knew how riled up you got when watching them, but they weren’t expecting you to be this caught up. 

Satoru glances back to Suguru, already finding his eyes trained on him. He wraps his hand around Suguru’s cock, slowly stroking it while he licks the underside of Suguru’s tip. As composed as Suguru looked, Satoru knew the truth. He could tell in the way Suguru’s fingers twitched at his side, how his shoulders tensed every time Satoru slid his cock in his mouth. 

Suguru might like to pretend he was this stoic man, but to Satoru he was an open book. One he’s read many, many times before. 

Satoru’s eyelashes flutter when he takes Suguru’s cock in one more time. He bobs his head faster than before, driven only by the cloud of lust that loomed over his head. If it weren’t for Suguru pulling his mouth off, Satoru would’ve continued for hours, always finding himself completely at home in between his partners legs. 

“Bend over for me.” Suguru says breathlessly. 

Satoru smiles, standing up. He watches as Suguru saunters away to the bedside drawer, looking for a bottle of lube. 

Satoru turns around facing you fully, his facade almost dropping when he meets your eyes. The expression is one he’s well acquainted with, as you wore it often. Your eyes were peeled wide open, lips trembling and parted. Your body fidgets under his gaze. You looked torn between holding up your bratty persona, or saying fuck it and begging for them. He thought it was cute how desperately you clung to pretending to be unbothered. Satoru would like to say he looked like that too when he got in his moods, but he knew he didn’t. Satoru didn’t have the patience to keep it up. If he wanted something, he cut the shit and wasn’t afraid to get on his hands and knees and beg. 

“Poor baby.” He cooes at you, leaning forward. 

He leans over close to your face, his presence instantly overwhelming. You scramble back, your body only stopping once you hit the head of the bed. 

“You could have this too if you only weren’t such a bad girl.” He pretends to pity you. He doesn’t, not really. 

He crawls on the bed, fully getting into position for Suguru. Your eyes flicker back and forth between his. 

“I don’t need it.” You boast, hoping your trembling voice doesn’t give you away. 

“No? You don’t need it? You don’t need me or Suguru? Bunny, I’m hurt.” Satoru pretends to frown. 

He inches up further, caging you in with his arms. You keep your chin held high, despite the fact his bright blues were seconds away from making you crumble. 

“Let’s see if that’s true.” He says. 

Satoru stuffs a hand in your shorts, the action causing you to jump. His fingers quickly find their way inside your underwear, the fabric soaked. 

Satoru groans loudly, his lips parting. His eyes remain on yours while his long finger skims your slit, dipping down into your hole. 

The tip of his finger sneaks into your pussy, the stretch making you throw your head back. Satoru likes playing with his food first, so he takes his time in seating his finger in you fully. 

Once his finger was fully sheathed in you, he curled it up. You raise your hands up, the last bits of control you had, ebbing away. You refuse to grab onto him and ask for more. 

“Oh bunny.” He moans obscenely. 

Satoru slowly drags his finger in and out, each time his finger retreats you want to yell. You couldn’t focus on Suguru anymore. A dull hum of pleasure flows through your veins. Satoru slides a second finger in to join the other, easing both back in. 

Satoru pumps his fingers inside you, your walls clinging desperately to him. He loved when you were a needy, teary eyed mess, pouting for attention. The only thing he loved more than that was when you were bratty. He liked seeing you put up a fight, pretending not to be their good girl. It made it all the more enjoyable when you finally gave into your desires. 

The only other person who enjoyed it more was- 

“Satoru.” Suguru’s stern voice comes up from behind Satoru. 

You’re filled with emptiness when Satoru pulls his fingers out of you. Satoru turns his head back and grins at Suguru. 

“What? You were busy.” 

“I was gone for less than a minute.” 

“I gotta keep myself entertained somehow.” 

“Can’t do that and keep your hands to yourself?”

“No, she’s too tempting.” 

Suguru grabs onto Satoru’s hips, dragging them back a bit so he’s no longer looming above you. 

Satoru feels cool liquid drip over his ass. Suguru grabs his ass and spreads it, watching the way the lube drips down coating Satoru’s hole. 

He rubs two fingers over his asshole, keeping a firm grip on Satoru. Satoru’s head hangs low, waiting on bated breath as Suguru presses his fingers in. 

Why start off slow? He needed to be inside Satoru now. 

You moan softly at the sight in front of you, the air feeling too hot. Satoru looks up at you, pressing his ass further back. He really wanted to see you naked. Satoru knew they were supposed to be punishing you, but it felt a bit unfair to punish himself too. 

“Take your clothes off, give Satoru something to look at.” Suguru says. 

The heavy tone of his voice makes your body move by itself. Your clothes are torn off, tossed over the edge of the bed. Satoru licks his lips once he’s met with your exposed body, your dripping pussy put on full display in front of him. Suguru moves his fingers faster, his eyes peering over to look at you. Your hole looked something desperate, wet and clenching around air. He was hoping Satoru wouldn’t rile you up more, but maybe his expectations were too high. 

Satoru fully expected to feel Suguru’s cock press against him, but Suguru stepped away from Satoru. 

Suguru dug around and found a toy, a dildo comparable to Satoru and his size. He handed it to you, your eyes jumping back and forth between him and the toy. 

“Since Satoru couldn’t help himself.” 

You grab it and pull it close to your body. You were grateful to have something fill you up, but you wanted it to be Satoru or Suguru, not this. 

Suguru settles himself behind Satoru once more, lining his cock up with Satoru’s hole. 

Satoru eyes you hungrily as you trace the toy down your slit, your eyes low. 

Suguru presses the tip of his cock into Satoru, making him let out a shaky breath. 

The second Suguru pushes inside Satoru, you press on the toy sliding it into you. Satoru’s salacious moans fill the room as Suguru pulls back and slams in once more. Even though the toy was close in size, it wasn’t comparable to the two men. 

Your hand works deftly at plunging the toy inside your heat, the sight in front of you egging you on. Satoru’s hands clasp at the bed sheets, a permanent expression of pleasure drawn on his face. He watches you intently, focused on the way your pussy stretches around the toy. 

His head bows down and he purses his lips, letting some of his spit collect before it slowly descends on top of your pussy. The extra fluid only makes the toy glide easier in you, feeling even better than before. 

“Satoru, oh-“ You moan. The sight was borderline pornographic. 

Your head falls back, your chest heaving as you try to breathe. 

“Eyes on me bunny.” Satoru tries to make his voice sound even, but Suguru wasn’t letting him. 

You gather all your strength and look forward. The toy plunges deep inside you, grazing against your sweet spot with every movement. It felt like some kind of cruel joke. You had two impeccable cocks at your disposal, but you were forced to use something fake that couldn’t amount to even half the pleasure they would give you. 

You catch the way Suguru’s hand reaches forward, grabbing a fistful of white hair. Satoru whines, the feeling pushing him closer to the deep end. Suguru reaches around Satoru’s hips with his other hand, running his palm over Satoru’s cock. Satoru moans loud, hand shaking against the bed. He grabs your calf, dropping his head and pressing his face into the muscle. You feel hot breaths in succession beating against your leg. 

Satoru’s legs shake from the pleasure. He felt like he might be able to compose himself, but then Suguru’s soft touch reached down to slide against his balls. 

“Fuck, Suguru…” Satoru moans breathlessly. 

Suguru holds Satoru’s balls tenderly while slamming into him from behind, the sight in front of him making his head fog. His two babies, absolutely ruined in front of him. 

“So tight Satoru, you’re such a good boy aren’t you?” Suguru cooes down at him. 

Tears bubble in your eyes, desperate to receive the same praise as Satoru. The toy pushes into you, making your palm graze your swollen clit. It needed more attention, it ached something fierce. 

Your fingers from your other hand trail down, skimming over your clit. Your moans increase in volume, snapping the men from their daze. 

“Hey, keep your hands to yourself.” Suguru orders. He had only allowed you to use the toy, nothing more. Suguru slams his hips forward once with more force, causing Satoru to push forward. 

His asshole ached from Suguru’s ministrations, but he never would dream of telling him to slow down. 

A low whine emits from your throat, the idea of leaving your clit be made you want to cry. 

“I don’t remember giving her permission to do that, do you Satoru?” Suguru questions, slick eyes staring into you. 

Suguru was a kind man, a soft man, but when he wanted to he could be terrifying. 

Satoru’s breath falters as he tries to regain some semblance of composure. 

“Hngg, n-no I didn’t, didn’t give her permission, fuck…” Satoru stutters out. 

You tear your hand away and instead grasp at the sheets below you. 

Suguru looks down at Satoru and watches how his back flexes. His shoulder blades curve as he holds himself up, clinging to some sense of sanity. He can practically feel how bad Satoru’s cock ached beneath him. 

Suguru removes his grasp on Satoru’s balls, jutting his fingers in front of Satoru’s lips. He doesn’t even need to speak for Satoru to understand what he needed to do. 

Satoru lets spit drip from his mouth, collecting on Suguru’s long fingers. Suguru hums contentedly and brings his hand back, coating Satoru’s sensitive balls in the spit. 

Suguru rubs them gently while pushing into Satoru’s ass. 

You watch Suguru’s fingers clench Satoru’s hair tightly, no doubt a low thrum of pain shooting in his scalp. Your hand aches at how it needs to be contorted to fuck yourself, but you were too needy to stop. 

You wouldn’t be able to cum like this, and maybe that’s why Suguru was okay with letting you do it. 

You had one last weapon in your arsenal, and you hoped to god it would work. 

“S-satoru.” You mewl pathetically. 

Satoru’s eyes fill with more lust if that was even possible, and you watch as he pulls away from your calf. 

He looks at you through heavy white lashes, trying to keep his gaze focused on you while he pushes his upper body up. The skin on your leg already missed his touch.

Suguru might want to reprimand you, but Satoru might give in. 

“Yeah bunny?” 

You slow your hand down, fucking yourself at a languid pace. 

You moan out, craving something to push you over the edge. 

“What do you need?” Hard eyes set on you. 

“Need more Satoru, please baby, please.” You wiggle your hips down, attempting to fuck down onto the toy. 

He gives a small grin before moaning out once more. He had a tough job, juggling two positions. He needed to look strong for you, but it was hard to do that when Suguru was decimating his insides. 

Satoru lets Suguru keep him steady by his hips while he reaches forward, hands wrapping around your waist and dragging you down. Your pussy is placed directly under his face, and the sight was enticing. 

“Oh honey, you’re dripping.” He groans. 

His ass jiggles against Suguru’s hips. Suguru heaves out a heavy sigh as Satoru leans down, licking from the base of the toy all the way up to your tortured clit. 

“Ah! Thank you Satoru thank you!” You plead. 

“Satoru.” Suguru reprimands, pulling his hand from his hair to get a better grip on his hips. 

Suguru saw it coming really. Satoru liked the idea of punishing you, but he never was able to do it. Satoru gave into his desires too quickly every time. At least Suguru was able to save some face, refusing to give in until you learned your lesson. 

Suguru’s fingers press into Satoru’s hips, while he pistons himself forward. He could feel Satoru’s walls clenching down on his cock, making it almost impossible to pull out. 

You squirm around the bed trying to push the toy inside you while Satoru licks your clit. His soft pink flesh draws circles around your clit, sucking it into his mouth. 

“Let go.” He murmurs against you. 

You reluctantly let go of the toy, digging your teeth into your tongue. Satoru takes over and wraps his hand around the base of the toy, slowly beginning to fuck you with it. 

“Shit, fuck, Satoru wait!” You groan, not sure whether you want to arch into his touch or away from it. 

He keeps himself propped up with one hand while using the other to drive the toy further into you. He’s mesmerized by the sound it makes, closing his eyes and letting his tongue guide him. Your squeals fall on deaf ears as he fucks you with the pseudocock, listening as you get closer to the edge. 

Suguru feels Satoru’s ass clench around him as he gets more turned on by indulging in you. He can tell he’s close to the edge and all Suguru can focus on is spurring him over. He speeds his thrusts up, hearing the way Satoru groans into you. 

“Gonna cum for me pretty boy?” Suguru pants, feeling his cock twitch. 

“Yes, yes suguru!” He whines, sloppily licking your folds. 

“Say it again, correctly this time.” Suguru throws his head back, his eyes closing. 

“Yes sir, gonna cum for you, gonna cum hard, fuck, please!” 

Satoru erratically fucks you with the toy, the pace dizzying to you. You want to beg him to slow down, but you don’t think he’d be able to hear you over the sounds of his moans. You don’t think he’d listen anyway. 

Suguru pulls Satoru’s ass back, shoving him over the edge. Satoru whimpers as his cock twitches, cum shooting out dirtying your sheets below. As he cums, Suguru groans and forces himself to look down. He wanted to last longer but there was absolutely no way he was going to. His face pinches while he cums deep in Satoru. 

Satoru slows down as he tries to regain composure, but you’re so far off the deep end that pleas fall from your lips. 

“Please don’t stop, please more I, I-“ Tears fill your waterline, your body breaking down from being teased for so long. 

Satoru looks up at you, a new sense of energy filling him immediately. He places slow soft kisses around your pussy, your body twitching each time he makes contact. Suguru hisses as he pulls out of Satoru, eyes glued to the way his cum begins to drip out of his hole. 

Satoru crawls closer to you on his knees, finally stable enough. One of his hands starts to slowly build up speed with the toy while the other holds your thigh up, keeping you spread for him. 

“I got you bunny.” He soothes, dipping his tongue out to lick against you. 

You’re so far removed that you don’t even notice Suguru until the bed dips beside you. He sits next to your head, his beautiful hand smoothing your hair. You whimper, head leaning into his touch. 

“Satoru’s so nice to you baby, don’t you think?” He asks. 

Your words are incoherent at this point but he thinks you murmur an agreement. 

“Gonna reward him then? Cum for him?” 

Satoru’s eyes flick up to see your response and the look on your face almost sends all the blood draining back to his cock. You look wrecked, torn apart. Your hair was disheveled, tears staining your cheeks. 

You prop yourself up once more by your arms, needing to see the way Satoru pleasured you. He was a beautiful, beautiful man. 

Suguru wraps one arm in front of you, crossing over your chest to stop you from caving in on yourself. His other hand drapes around you, trailing up your hot sticky skin. You grab his hand and bring it close to your lips, desperate to have something fill your empty mouth. 

Suguru watches, always amazed at how you somehow got sexier. His two fingers fill your mouth, resting against your tongue. It helps your moans from spilling out, instead getting buried against his skin. Suguru’s pinky and thumb hold each side of your cheeks while he slowly finger fucks your mouth, watching as Satoru sucks your clit. 

You claw at the arm containing you. You wanted to curl in on yourself, you were quickly finding all the attention to be too much. Satoru speeds up his hand, tilting it so the toy beats against your sweet spot each time it enters. Your body tenses as you feel yourself cum, body scrambling beneath their strong hold. 

Suguru slowly drags his fingers out of your mouth but continues to hold you as you settle down. Satoru pulls the toy from you and licks up all your spilt cum. Your body stills in Suguru’s hold, your sniffling being the only sound in the room. 

Satoru places the toy to the side and helps lay your legs down. Seconds ago your body was brimming with electricity, but now you felt burnt out. Suguru leans down and kisses your head, standing up to move you so he can sit fully on the bed. He never once lets go of you, and picks you up to place you on his lap once he’s sat. He holds you as you tremble in his grasp, all emotions from the moment finally washing over you. 

“You did so good, baby.” He whispers, holding you tight against his chest. 

You nod and look up, meeting his gaze. He wears a soft smile as he fixes your hair for you. 

“Did I?” You ask, sounding hopeful. 

“Yes, you were perfect for us.” His eyes trace your face as if he needs to memorize each individual line. He does this even though he already committed them to memory years ago. 

“I’m sorry for being mean to you guys, I didn’t…” You try to hold back tears, regret flooding over you. 

You didn’t want to be mean to them, and the idea of hurting their feelings weighed heavily over you. 

“Hey, it’s okay.” Suguru presses a kiss to your lips. 

“Punishments aren’t a bad thing baby. Sometimes you just need to be reminded, that’s all. Everyone can be a brat sometimes, just ask Satoru.” 

“Hey, I heard that.” Satoru grumbles, shuffling in bed, sitting beside Suguru. 

“I know you did.” Suguru tilts his head back and gives a small smirk to Satoru. 

They both share a quick kiss before returning their attention to you. 

Suguru initially preferred to watch you be forced to watch them, body screaming for their touch, but he was content with what happened as well. Each time you fell apart for them was something he loved. 

“I love you baby.” 

“I love you bunny.” 

Heat rises to your cheek and you wrap your arms around their shoulders, burying your face between them. 

“I love you both.” 

Being a brat hardly worked in your favor. 

But maybe for tonight it did. 

Tag List: @tojislittleprincesss

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[twilightprince101]

I see a lot of AU's for In Stars and Time revolving around the idea of "what if X character was looping instead of Siffrin" and they are all wonderful. I adore the sight of seeing how exactly they slowly but surely break down over the course of months, maybe even years of repeating the same day and seeing how they contextualize the game's events from their perspective.

But there's one piece of all of these AU's that I wish was included a bit more: their feelings at the very, very start in regards to communication with others.

When Siffrin is told that he can tell his party about the time loop at any time, he immediately dismisses the idea because that is who he is as a person. Extremely caring for others, barely caring for himself. This is arguably the catalyst for the entire story (yes, even compared to WHY the loops started at all).

But how exactly do the other characters deal with that information around the start? How do they initially start the timeloop when told "there's nothing stopping you from asking for help?"

For example: Mirabelle. She already has a LOT on her plate since she's struggling with being "The Chosen." But I feel that being put in the time loop like this would actually be a relief for her. She is quite literally chosen by some sort of deity to try as many times as she wants. She's thankful because she really was chosen by the Change God (hahaha). So maybe at the start she would be more confident, talk with everyone and explain the full situation at the clock tower. "Yes, we did die against the King, but everything is back to how it was. If we work harder, we can make it!" But she would do that, every single time. The same conversation. And she's too wrapped up in that routine that she just focuses on reassuring everyone that things will be okay and saying the exact same words. Mirabelle's catalyst is similar to Siffrin's in that they both care for their friends, but while Siffrin helps fix everyone's problems, Mirabelle helps comfort everyone emotionally and doesn't focus on herself.

Then there's Odile. I feel she would treat the matter objectively, almost like a standard time loop protagonist. The first thing she does is tell everyone about it, finding some way to prove it ("Bonnie got X ingredients, Isabeau never made a wish at the favor tree, etc."). But after a certain point, going through all of those extra steps becomes draining. So she instead focuses on saying the right words which will get everyone else to do certain actions. "If I ask what fruits Boniface is bringing tomorrow then they'll keep that in the front of their mind, which will cause them to eat the pineapple early, eliminating the risk that Siffrin will die of their allergy." But throughout it all, she never factors her own feelings as to why the time loops are happening. That is Odile's catalyst: she is too logical and doesn't acknowledge feelings as part of the equation.

Perhaps later on in the timeloop they would do different things entirely, stop talking to others all together. But this is specifically about everyone's catalyst at the very start, their own version of "Why would you need help? You're in the position to help everyone here." It would likely take longer to happen than Siffrin's, the emotionally repressed gremlin, but the end result would still be the same. It's about self-isolation after all.

I just think it's a fun thing to think about.

[ts-witchy-archive]

Prosperity Oil Recipe!

So I made this oil a few weeks back and I've already had success with it despite having only used it on my skin without much intention. I thought I would share the recipe for anyone who wants it. Feel free to change or substitute anything you like. I focused a lot on peace of mind in this spell. It's easier to feel abundant and wealthy when you're not in a constant state of money anxiety.

Ingredients:

Oil of your choice

A Jar

Crystals (I used Citrine, Aventurine and Selenite)

Lavender (peace, anti-anxiety)

Bay Leaves (wealth, prosperity)

Cloves (money)

Oregano (peace and joy)

Cinnamon (money and speed)

Peppermint (abundance and money)

Optional: An offering for a deity/spirit guide/ancestor you want to help you.

Method:

Cleanse your space, your items and yourself.

If you're asking for help from a deity/other entity light their candle, give the offering and ask now.

Using intention for each ingredient, gently place them into your jar.

Measure out your oil and add it to the jar. Make sure you add slightly more oil than you need because your ingredients may absorb some. Personally, I also add extra so I have enough to offer to the Deity who helped my with this spell.

Put on the lid and shake it well while repeating your intention.

Find a cool, preferably dark area to let the oil infuse. On top of the lid or around the oil add some selenite, citrine and aventurine to enhance the intention.

Shake every day or two. After about 2 weeks strain and bottle.

Notes: I recommend doing this spell on a Tuesday to increase the speed of the oil working. Additionally, Please make sure you only add dried herbs. If you don't things will probably mould.

Please don't put the crystals into the oil. Even though citrine and aventurine are a type of quartz they shouldn't be left in liquids for long periods of time. In a similar vain, cinnamon can cause skin irritation so if you want to use this oil topically please patch test it (I will say though, the oil doesn't smell good so unless you're okay with that then maybe don't wear it lol)

[blasphemecel]

Michael Kaiser — Voyeur to Belonging

PAIRING: Michael Kaiser/Reader WORD COUNT: 5.3k TYPE: Humor, Slice of life/domestic fluff (its technically a roommate setting) WARNING(S): None? NOTE(S): Reader character is an alien. Yes you read that right. A shapeshifting alien of some sort. The narrative is non-linear

Birthday

There was a coconut on the kitchen counter top.

Kaiser was confused. Most days he was disoriented on account of your incomprehensible behavior anyway, but this was new. You stood there, caressing it, and he wasn’t really sure what it was supposed to achieve while he watched you. Of course, there was other bullshit too, but the coconut was the most attention grabbing.

He didn’t bother asking. He also didn’t bother announcing himself to begin with when he first entered, since he had come home not long ago, and mainly because he was impolite. It was fine because you didn’t have any standard conventions about courtesy.

Instead of raising any valid questions, he went to shower.

Not like he cared to converse — when he wouldn’t immediately see you upon entering, he’d walk around looking for you because the thought you disappeared somewhere without notice kind of irritated him, and then he’d spot you and he’d be calm again. And then he wouldn’t explain what it was all about. Maybe you thought it was some funny human behavior he was exhibiting. The notion was appealing.

Though Kaiser was a bit over the top and didn’t have much consideration towards the water bill which made showering an entire event for him, it couldn’t have taken that long for him to emerge. He still had the towel on by the time he stepped back into the kitchen, curiosity eating at him. What was the coconut for? Surely it was something moronic and frivolous, but he was too impatient to keep pretending inquiring was beneath him.

Any intrigue he was feeling dropped to the floor and dissolved into the puddle he’d created by moving around while still wet when his brain processed the sight in front of him.

There was… a lot of powder(?) everywhere. Mostly on the kitchen counter and then some.

“What the hell,” said Kaiser, gesturing. “What the hell are you doing?”

He didn’t really like getting angry over stupid shit like this, the kind of problem which could easily be fixed. It reminded him of his dad, but then again how the fuck was he supposed to stay calm in this situation. In the face of his own ire, Kaiser was nauseous.

You turned around to respond and seemed rather joyous. His jaw clenched further, his forehead wrinkled more.

“My preparations,” you said.

“Your preparations,” he repeated. “For what?”

“The cake.”

Kaiser pinched the bridge of his nose.

“The recipe said it needs ‘coconut-pecan frosting,’” you continued even though he did not want an elaboration.

It occurred to him what had happened. Usually it would be more obvious, but the shock was so severe, he didn’t contemplate the situation as he was focusing his energy on not blowing a gasket. “You can buy the ingredients for that at the store-”

“Well, I didn’t.”

“-not grind it down. Would you hunt and skin a fucking chicken in cold blood if you wanted to make wings?!” He was raising his voice now.

The volume grated on your nerves and you raised your hands as if to placate him, backing off. Your reaction didn’t mollify him in the slightest. “It’s more convenient and it costs no money.”

“How is it more convenient?” There was a loaded silence. Kaiser didn’t understand where you got a whole coconut to begin with, but that was besides the point. “Why were you trying to make a cake anyway? ‘Cause if it’s some shitty new hobby you’re taking up again, do it away from my house.”

You blinked at him twice in this slow, deliberate manner, scrutinizing him as if he was stupid for not understanding what the purpose of this was. Then you said, “For Micha’s birthday.”

Even though you’d flinched away from him and he kept yelling without a care, that was what it took for him to immediately deflate and feel like shit. If anything, he was flustered and unsure, all that bravado for naught. You wanted to celebrate with him — wanted to do something for him. Remembered the date, even. His hand wrapped around his throat unconsciously, albeit without squeezing.

It wasn’t an extraordinary or special occasion. You technically celebrated with him last year too, but you didn’t know what that was all about. Wherever you came from, you claimed birthday parties weren’t a ‘practice’ there. The two of you were similar, in a way.

“Listen, so, I looked up ‘German cake’ because you claimed you were from Germany. The website said to use coconut-pecan frosting.”

“I don’t claim I was from Germany, I really am, and I still am, it’s not past tense,” he said, trying to distract from his regret by nitpicking.

“Well, anyway,” you beamed at him, and then you reached out towards him, and then you embraced him with the skills of a natural, even though that was something else you said wasn’t a ‘practice,’ “happy birthday, Micha!”

He let go of his neck to stiffly wrap his arms around your back. There was coconut powder on your fingers still, and it was sticking to his bare skin in clumps and copious amounts because you were touching him since he was still wet. It was a funny ploy, intentional, like you were checking how far you could go with an abused dog, trying to see if it’s comfortable with you yet. If giving him affection was enough for him to overlook anything in the world.

Kaiser was enjoying your hug, but he didn’t say anything about it beyond an ungrateful sounding thanks after the birthday wish. It was obvious, though, in the way he held onto you tighter the moment you tried to separate from him.

“But what about the cake? Should I scrap it…?”

“You can burn down the kitchen if you want to,” allowed Kaiser, both generous and unwise. Imprudent in that he was trying to flex on an alien in a roundabout way — look, I am rich, I do not care about superficial things like the kitchen, and coming from the guy who almost threw a tantrum over it.

The development pleased you, however, because you cheered and pecked him on the cheek. He flushed under the attention. You always found it fascinating, the way his skin could change colors, even if the shift wasn’t so dramatic. “Yay,” you said as an afterthought, “I love fire.”

The experiment was a success. You could get away with pretty much anything as long as you played your cards right.

To Kaiser’s surprise, the cake even ended up coming out delicious. Again he did not compliment you on it.

Dye

Kaiser was in the bathroom, which was a place he spent a lot of time in. But instead of admiring himself (that was what he called his creepy staring at his reflection), he was doing something to his hair. He was applying a mysterious liquid to it and he’d tied it up strangely. You hoped it wasn’t a new look he was trying.

“Do you need something?” he asked, not looking at you.

You stepped closer. Not knowing how to formulate a more specific question on the matter, you asked, “What is this behavior?” and then gestured vaguely at what he was doing.

For a second, Kaiser halted in surprise at the strange wording. “I’m refreshing my dye.”

“Ah,” you said with a smile, “I thought it was natural?”

“Sorry you had to find out this way.”

“You are deceiving.”

“Hopefully it wasn’t too big of a heartbreak.”

“Are you insecure your hair isn’t blue, Micha?” you asked. “The advice columns always say you should just be yourself.”

There was a good chance you were mocking him, but due to the possibility you were genuinely concerned about him, he wrinkled his nose to make a show of his disdain towards your ignorance and said, “No, it’s not a self esteem thing. Who the fuck is insecure their hair isn’t blue?”

“Are you trying to signal you’re poisonous?”

“I’m not some shitty animal,” he said in earnest, even though this confirmed you were messing with him.

“Do you cut it by yourself too?”

“Yes.”

“Why, can’t you afford a barber?”

Kaiser’s eye twitched in irritation. “I don’t like strangers touching my head.” It came out sounding stupid in relation to a hairstylist, but he hoped you wouldn’t question it.

“Ah, ok.” You smiled in an unsettling way. Kaiser tried to concentrate. There was a long bout of silence before you delivered the next ego killer of a question, “If you cut it by yourself, why would you willingly shape it like that?”

“There’s nothing wrong with it.” He crossed his arms and tilted up his chin, upturning his nose in a snobby gesture, before he ran his fingers through his hair. “In fact, I think it’s unique and charming, and one of my best features.”

You grimaced as you watched. “Micha, you’re totally messing it up! Don’t move like that! It’s dripping everywhere and you’re getting it all over your fingers.”

He, too, blinked like an owl, and let go of his strands at a dramatically slow pace, and then he stared at the tips of his fingers coated in blue like they were burned. “Fuck.” Then he glanced at his reflection in the mirror and realized he had smeared dye where he was supposed to still be blond. “Fuuuuck.”

You stood there, useless. As sympathetic as you were to his predicament, you didn’t want to contribute anything.

Kaiser narrowed his gaze at you anyway and said, “Maybe instead of standing there distracting me, you should help me fix it.”

“Ah. The mystic workings of the concoction evade me.”

“They clearly don’t!”

You inched away from him until you were out of the door. Kaiser bared his teeth and glared at the spot even after you’d long vacated it.

Massage

Your human was ill-tempered and prone to sulking.

Often he was unhappy or had an attitude for no discernible reason. Most days, on average, he could find an opportunity to turn at least three interactions into something painful.

The internet was an unintelligent place, which made it easy to parse through (as long as you didn’t take everything said at face value, which you learned after you warned him that his deodorant was going to give him breast cancer; apparently people do not fact check before publishing and lying is not a punishable offense). All you had to do was type, and there — information. You were used to the more reliable system back home, but those networks had nothing to offer on this culture, so…

Anyway, you searched for inspiration for what you could do. It was obvious Kaiser was susceptible to kindness and you thought maybe you could coax him into being more pleasant, at least occasionally. So, what you looked up was ‘nice gestures.’

A lot of the results seemed impractical: babysit for free — you could not find a baby; donate — all the items in the house were his so you did not see the point of donating them to him; listen — you listened to him daily; acknowledge his efforts — he looked at you as if you were a weirdo when you started calculating the trajectory of that magnus-impact-whatever thingy and then gave him a fake diploma for a physics degree.

But then you came upon a sensible suggestion, which was to give a massage. It seemed applicable, since he was an athlete and all. Kaiser even agreed to it without making a fuss.

He was on his stomach, lying on the bed with his face half-hidden in the pillow so you wouldn’t be able to see if he did anything embarrassing. You sat on top of him and tried being gentle even though you were tempted to dig your fingers in his scapula just to check if he would scream. 

Things were going well, he was even relaxed, until you asked, “Hey Micha, do you get massages?”

“Yeah, sometimes.” Though they were usually the painful sports ones and he wasn’t about to admit to feeling pain in front of you or anything else embarrassing.

“Is it like some kind of mating ritual?”

“What the hell?” he asked, bemused. “Of course the fuck not.”

“So you’re not into the massage therapist?”

“No! Why would you think that? Do you find it erotic, you strange creature?”

“No. I watched this video where a bird was trying to seduce another bird with a silly little dance. Thought it might be something like that.”

“What kind of conclusion is that?” he asked. You could tell even through the muffle that he was gritting his teeth. You decided to massage his face after you’re done with this, since he made those ugly expressions so often and probably had tension. Maybe the rigidity was making him easy to vex. “I swear, you assume such stupid shit, it appalls me.”

Kaiser drifted off to sleep mid complaining about your apparent cluelessness and woke up in a good mood a few hours later. However, the bad side effect was that he started demanding massages any time he perceived things weren’t going his way, so then you had to think of a way to trick him out of his giving orders addiction.

Clothes

“I like wearing yours, though,” you whined. It was unbefitting for someone at a luxury store, but then again what did you care.

Kaiser’s eyebrows pinched together. It was obvious the employees were judging you both considering the brain dead conversation you’d been having, but he had a different problem entirely. Like a toddler who didn’t want to share his toys at the playground, he hissed, “They’re my clothes, not yours! I’ll get you some.”

You pouted. The action was extremely ungrateful and petulant considering not everyone had a celebrity begging to let them buy them expensive new clothes, but as already established, you didn’t care that you were trifling. “Is there a robe or something, at least?”

“No, there aren’t any robes.” He was already exhausted, squeezing his eyes shut and massaging his temples.

You rolled your eyes and faked a loud yawn.

“At least try one out.” Kaiser pulled out some random miscellaneous item from the rack you were arguing in front of and shoved it into your hands with this expectant look on his face.

Deciding to humor him, you moved to strip. Thankfully it didn’t come to that since Kaiser stopped you, pulling your top back down before you’d even gotten to exposing your midriff.

“You’re uncivilized. Go to the changing rooms.”

“Such a pathetic, prudish society,” you said as if everyone else was wrong. From your perspective it was probably true.

“It’s not prudish, it’s called public indecency and I don’t want to associate with a reprobate.”

“That’s a new one, Micha! I haven’t heard it before.”

He rolled his eyes and ushered you in the direction of the changing rooms. His gaze followed after you while you meandered there, disinterest in the affair palpable. Ingrate.

Kaiser picked a few more clothes he wanted to see you try on. When he turned around, the assistant nearby was looking at him strangely. He remained stoic and went on standing tall and proud as if she was the weird one.

Origin

Kaiser liked to brood on the balcony because he thought that was a productive and angsty activity, fit for a troubled intellectual. You did not understand the point (or even what he was doing in particular), so sometimes you hung around him indifferently. Before growing better acquainted with each other he ignored you, although it was nice to have an audience for his mental movie anyway. He was the type of person who enjoyed things like that.

As time passed and he got more used to your presence, though, he’d sit down with you and talk to you instead. That day he asked you, “You never told me, how’d you end up here?” … With me?

“Micha is rich with a big house!” you said with a grin. His spirits dampened — the reasoning was practical, but he would’ve preferred something more poetic maybe. You went on, “I thought I could hide in the vents, but you found me after I snuck in. Whoops.”

He made a face. “You’re such a weird fucking… creepy crawly.” Then he cursed himself because he would’ve preferred to be more articulate.

“And you are a toddler.”

“Did you try anywhere else before my place, though?”

“Yeah. The guy found me before I could hide and called me a naked homeless bum! And then he tried to beat me with a shovel.”

“You must be bad at hiding,” said Kaiser in a tone as if you were beneath him, unconcerned by this information. Then an odd detail stood out to him. “I’m pretty sure you were dressed when I first saw you.”

You smiled at him, but did not elaborate on where you got those stained clothes from back then.

There was an implication.

Morning

You hung onto Kaiser while he brushed his teeth, hugging him from the back. Usually you slept in way after him, but there were rare occasions you’d barge in on him in the mornings, if he rustled too much and disturbed you. Again, for someone who preached that this was not a ‘practice,’ you sure did it a lot.

“Micha, why do you brush so hard? I don’t believe it’s any more effective.”

“Shut up,” he said, making an effort to go slower and less aggressive now that you’d pointed it out. “Don’t watch me. I don’t accept constructive criticism,” he added when you didn’t respond.

Though you changed your appearance to look human (albeit still a bit uncanny in a way he couldn’t quite place — maybe his knowledge that you were extraterrestrial hindered his view), the inherent differences between you and him were the most obvious when you were in contact skin to skin. He wasn’t warm to begin with, but your skin was so much cooler, it was enough to startle him if he didn’t see you coming. There was a contrast in texture, too.

Your hand rested over his chest while you began leaving feather light kisses over his nape and then down to his shoulder. Kaiser was annoyed because he was getting goosebumps. “You’re so clingy sometimes,” he complained.

“Your heart always starts beating faster when I kiss you,” you said. “It’s cute.”

“Stop observing me like a scientist.”

You hugged him tighter and kissed him a bit more firmly. “I wanna bite you real hard past the skin and suck your blood. You’d probably be one of the sweeter ones.”

What a creepy thing to say at seven in the morning. Kaiser had to respect your dedication to the craft at this point.

“Leech,” he said with disdain, though to be honest he was kind of flustered. “I thought you’re supposed to be an alien, not some lame vampire.”

“What? You have blood-sucking creatures here, don’t you, Micha? There is hematophagy in nature.”

“That’s not really the point.”

“I guess so,” you said.

Kaiser was partly annoyed because he was getting butterflies in his stomach, which was stupid and childish. It was clear you wanted to taste him more than you already had, and while usually that would have a more indecent connotation, in your case it was frightening. Like, so disconcerting, he was afraid of you. And it was confusing to be turned on and scared at the same time, but somehow the anxiety was pleasant.

Texting

You lounged around in the bathtub. There were lit candles and blue petals and some other stereotypical bullshit littered about, and you’d been wasting more time than necessary anyway. It wasn’t your fault the world was so dull whenever Kaiser was away from you. That was why when he wasn’t around the house, you did all sorts of extraneous things.

With a reach, you felt around for your phone until you could grab it, and then you turned it on and took a selfie. When you opened your chat with him, you saw he still hadn’t read or replied to anything else you sent him throughout the day, but you kinda forgot you did that anyway.

There were pictures of the sky and a few trees you liked and some old man you talked to when you went out hiking and of your meal at a restaurant which you didn’t even finish because it made you ill, all coupled with unimportant captions.

You sent him the selfie, where you were frowning.

You - 11:07 Micha I miss you soooooo much! I had some fun today but overall it’s boring I love you ♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡

Michael Kaiser - 03:32 Don’t spam me Replied to “I had some…”: Whatever, suffer more without me I love you too

Label

“Micha,” you said with grave seriousness as you stared down at your phone, “you have a paraphilia.”

He flinched at the word, directed at him no less, and gritted his teeth. “What nonsense are you saying now? Always throwing around random shit in the air like you’re getting paid.”

You turned the screen towards him, pointing. It was some list on Wikipedia and your finger was hovering near the word ‘exophilia.’ “This is what you have,” you said matter-of-factly.

Kaiser had an unreadable expression, mostly because it was vacant and unimpressed.

“No need to use words you don’t understand the nuance of.” He smirked, getting over the initial… whatever reaction he was having, and then he reached out to wrap an arm to pull you into his lap while he sat like he was on a throne even though it was just a lounge chair. Kaiser gestured in the air with ostentation while he spoke, “It only makes sense an extraordinary person like myself would have a unique lover, to gaze upon otherworldly beauty, unlike all those other scoundrels who need to mingle among themselves.”

Now you were the one with a blank face. After some staring, you tapped his cheek. “Micha is so silly and pretentious sometimes…”

“When you talk about me like that, you make me feel really stupid. You’re supposed to feel flattered, not insult me.”

You ignored the complaint, but wrapped your arms around his neck and leaned in to kiss him on the cheek a few times as an appeasement. As usual, he melted into it, and he found himself embarrassed because it was such a small thing to get so affected by.

“Besides, you’ve got to have the same thing. Because I am to you what you are to me,” Kaiser said, still feeling a need to justify himself.

“Hmm. Yes. That’s true. Yay, we’re a freaky couple! Isn’t it nice?”

Kaiser didn’t understand what was so appealing to you with your enthusiasm about the word choice and all. At least if he was sick for his attraction, so were you. There was a unity in that.

Birthday II

You greeted Kaiser outside when he arrived and began dragging him back in, excited to show him something. Kaiser decided to be a pissy killjoy purely for the love of the game, “I don’t see what the point of buying me a present with my money is. I could do that on my own and probably pick something better too.”

“Don’t worry. I made it myself.”

Well, now he was vaguely scared about what it could be. But he was all cool and collected on the outside, so it didn’t count as real trepidation in his mind.

It was in the middle of the corridor on the second floor. Even though he already had a glimpse of it while approaching, you still presented it to him as if he hadn’t seen it at all, stretching out your arms and pursing your lips for the grand reveal.

There stood a statue of him posing with a ball and some kind of trophy. Kaiser didn’t bother asking how you ‘made it yourself.’ A lot of things about you, he was better off just not knowing. And even if he did, he might not get it. He didn’t want to be in a position where he misinterpreted you entirely, so it was better this way, like some kind of mystery.

But anyway this was very embarrassing. You had some kind of notion you had about him which was being communicated right now without words, that he was the kind of guy who sucked his own dick so much he’d enjoy this demented present. The most shameful part was that you were correct, he kind of liked it. It looked nice and all and it was life sized. His pose was grandiose. He didn’t know if he should be flattered or if he should dig a hole and bury his head in it, but either way he was made to feel exposed and attacked by your actions.

After the initial inner conflict, Kaiser decided to address you since it was becoming uncomfortable. “Thanks, you captured my likeliness rather well.”

You seemed pleased by the feedback. Often he noticed you cared about the more pragmatic things, in this case about whether your handiwork was accurate, if it was up to par.

He stood next to it and smirked at you before asking, “Who looks better?”

“Micha is the most beautiful man in the world,” you cheered. “He’s even more beautiful than himself!”

Hehehehe.

But he wouldn’t dare make such an undignified sound out loud.

Kaiser preened at the praise, even though he knew you were wording it in such an exaggerated way just to please him, going along with his fishing for compliments. While he preferred to think of himself as a complex and elusive person who no one understood, there were things about him that were rather simple.

Taxi

That day you had an interesting conversation with Kaiser over the phone. He instructed you to go to the airport and you argued with him about how planes were insufficient for transportation and then you found out they didn’t have teleportation pods and then both of you got too distracted over some made up, incoherent conflict. But anyway, in the end you asked him what you were supposed to do at the airport to begin with since it was such a boring place, and he said he wanted you to pick him up.

Once you climbed inside the passenger seat, you gave the driver the address Kaiser sent you. The driver didn’t seem particularly inclined to converse, but you talked to him. “My roommate is asking me to pick him up.”

“Cool,” he said, not giving a fuck.

“Between you and me, isn’t he handsome?”

You smiled and flashed him your lock screen, which was an unflattering picture of Kaiser (what the big stink was about, you didn’t remember). Those were surprisingly easy to capture considering how often he made all those ugly grimaces.

Though the driver wasn’t a football fanatic, he recognized the man — a celebrity. His exterior stood strong and he remained impassive on the outside, but he thought to himself, I’m stuck in a car with a delusional socially inept erotomaniac.

He replied in an even tone, “Sure.”

He also thought he was entering mass psychosis when fifteen minutes after he dropped you off, you brought back Michael Kaiser to the car, in the flesh (you were carrying around his luggage as if it weighted nothing before you loaded it in the trunk), and you were even talking to him about his away game, and he was bitching about some other players you didn’t seem to recognize beyond Kaiser’s hatred of them. Which implied you weren’t even a football fan.

Regardless, the driver acted natural.

Orbit

You’d been acting withdrawn all day this weekend, which worried Kaiser since it was uncharacteristic, and in turn he started being annoying and dramatic if not overbearing, as if he was seeking some sign in your responses that you weren’t mad at him through his antics.

The reason for this erratic behavior was rather pitiful. Within him there was an unease.

It wasn’t like you were locked in or anything. You were free to go out at any time, and you did. There were times he feared you’d figure out how to go back to your planet — selfish as it was, he hoped such good fortune would never befall you so you’d need to stay with him — and worse he thought maybe during one of your strolls you’d meet someone, get to know them. You had some acquaintances, but they weren’t really close to you, and he thought if there was someone you connected with and got to know better, you’d realize he was defective. Pathologically egocentric and incapable of… Well, he wasn’t sure what it was, but he knew sides of him were hollow, he was lacking. Since he was mishandled as a kid; even his parents couldn’t love him.

Of course, Kaiser did the mature thing any adult would do and didn’t speak his mind, letting it eat at him.

So his anxiety spiked when after all that avoiding him — on his day off no less — you asked, “Micha, don’t you think it’s time for you to go back to all the other humans?”

It didn’t even sound like a rejection, more like you were shooing him away. He just froze. There was an expression on his face as if he was spacing out, eyes widened slightly and mouth set in a thin line.

“Why do you say that?” he asked right back, trying to remain calm.

“Because you’d always rather spend your free time with me than anyone else. And you’re always doing all those things for me… Doesn’t it other you from your peers? What if I start rubbing off on you?”

Kaiser grabbed you by the shoulders. Though such desperate movements and measures and everything-s were below him in his opinion (or at least they were counterintuitive to the way he portrayed himself), he was already on edge and he didn’t want to mince his words. Like the window for winning you over was timed and he was sprinting to squeeze himself in. He supposed he was able to strip himself of his self-inflicted guidelines if necessary. It was just that he usually didn’t deem things outside of football important.

“I don’t care about that. I choose to spend all that time with you because I enjoy it. You make me feel human, so don’t leave. I want to love and care for someone and… I want to be loved and cared for in return, too.”

You seemed surprised by this. Kaiser thought such a thing would be obvious, but then again there were gaps between you that left room for misunderstandings which wouldn’t even be taken into account before they arose.

His love for you was self-involved to an extent. There was a certain light you saw him in — as a human — and he liked experiencing himself in that way through your perspective, but there was more to it than that, something he’d never felt before and couldn’t put into words. So it was real nonetheless, even if coming from someone deficient like him.

“Do you really mean that?” you asked.

“Yeah. Of course.”

He was really firm on it, too, and didn't hesitate before answering. You were a little nervous about what was about to happen.

“I want you to stay with me for as long as possible,” he said. There was an unspoken, Do you?

This seemed to cheer you up from whatever had caused your doubts because you smiled again. “Let’s mispronounce je t’aime together till the end of time.”

“What a disgustingly cute sentiment,” Kaiser said, letting go of your shoulders to embrace you properly, and then he started leaning in.

You shared a slow kiss with him. At first it was gentle and hesitant, but then you both relaxed into it, and he grew more confident in his advances. Kaiser caressed every part of you he touched with what you recognized as real desire, like it didn’t matter that you didn’t really look the way you presented yourself to him or how different you were from one another or even that there might be ways in which your bodies were incompatible.

___

This was just some stupid experimental half joke half allegorical bs that I wrote because I had the idea and I'm very normal and casual about the fact that kaiser sees himself as not inherently possessing humanity. Anyway if something is unclear u can ask me about it or share what you think!

[seishinnookami]

chapter one; Yuu’s sibling!?

Twisted wonderland x Obey me

Yuu’s pronouns; They/ them for now

not on a canon time line

perspective: second “as they turned around.”

It was a warm day, the sun shining through the classroom windows, the teacher’s beloved voice calling out;

”Now, remember to only put one of these into your pot, unkess you want to end up covered in dust from head to toe!”

He warned, dropping the some sort of plant like ingredient into the potion, which glowed int a soft hue, barely visible in the light of the warm sun. Then the colour shifted into a mint green colour.

Yuu stood beside Deuce, nervously following after the instructions. They gently dropped it inside as professor Crewel showed. They let out a sigh when the colour changed into that pretty green. The tense atmosphere of danger Yuu has surround themselves with suddenly broke when the door of the classroom was bursted open.

“It is I~!”

The voice of the headmaster called out, smirking proudly as Crewel send him an unamused glance.

“Don’t worry, I’m only here for the Prefect!”

He trotted over to them, grabbing them by the wrist. 

“Because I am oh so gracious you have been excused this day to help me!” 

The headmaster said, dramatically as always. He turned around and pulled Yuu with himself, but as he did so, the rest of the ingredient fell from his hands, making them pale as they watched two more fall into the pot. 

“The potion-“ 

They tried to warn Deuce, only to Crowley to cut them off again. 

“Haha! Don’t worry about your potion!” 

He rushed them down the hallway, the sound of something blowing up could be heard, making Yuu more willing to follow the man than before. 

“So.. why do you need me exactly, headmaster?” 

They asked in an unsure manner, mostly because whenever Crowley needed them, they most certainly got into danger or almost killed. 

“Someone came appeared on school grounds, they have no magic, just like you! The mirror said that they have no where to return to, just like you! What a coincidence!” 

He laughed nervously, clearing his throat. 

“But why I called you is because I can’t talk to them, they are rambling on about something, shouting at me if I get too close. Even after I so kindly brought them in!” 

He huffed, raising his nose high, clearly offended, but he silently prayed the human didn’t cause too much trouble while he was away. 

“I hoped that you could talk to them, since you were once in the same place.” 

He finally explained why he dragged Yuu out, just as they reached the mirror’s gorgeous hall. 

As the doors opened, Yuu had found themselves watching an another human pacing up and down and just as Crowley said; angrily mumbling to themselves. 

“No! I did not survive those troublesome demons to get dragged- kidnapped AGAIN?! Haha! No way! I’m not going to start a new school, leave all things behind again?! I’m not going through that, AGAIN!” 

They huffed, stopping as they started to feel dizzy. Mc sighed, out of breath, turned towards the stupid bird man who dragged them inside. 

Their eyes land on Yuu. 

“… Yuu?” 

They whispered, eyes wide while a small droplet of tear cascades down their cheeks. They seemed to recognise Tuu, whispering their name in disbelief. Their eyes swam with a lot of emotion inside, some of them unrecognisable.  

Mc’s could help but step closer to the two, cheeks drenched in salty tears.

“I’m sorry.. do i know you?” 

Their step falters, eyes wide as they fall onto their knees. 

“W-what?” 

They sound lost, breathless and confused.

“Yuu? This isn’t funny!” 

Yuu looks apologetic, the person before them looked familiar, but they did not remember them. No matter how hard they tried, there was no memory. They was hit by a sense of longing, missing this person. But there was no reason for them to feel like this. 

This person was a stranger, right?

“Yuu! It’s me, (om)y/n!”

They cried out, hoping this was all just a cruel joke.

“I-i am truly sorry, but I don’t know you.”

Yuu repeated, their voice sounding empty in the air against the cries of the stranger front of them.

they felt sorry for the stranger, how did they knew they name?

they was confused, the sunny day that they had woken up to no longer looking so sweet, seeing the broken person before them. Maybe they wasn’t the one they was looking for? They knew the feeling of stress of the unknown, being woken up in a coffin isn’t funny. They thought about it for a moment, maybe they did know them, but they don’t remember anything from the time before getting here…

the soft steps of Yuu’s shoe could be heard as it echoed through the hall. It danced with the echo of the stranger’s sobs, almost like a dark lullaby, trying to lull someone to eternal sleep.

“I may not know you…”

they whispered, kneeling down before the broken looking body of trembling sobs . Who looked up at them with- lashes sticking together from their tears. (-their skin sparkling with the salty, sad liquid) [< for those who don’t have hair]

“But.. could you tell me who you are? To me?”

“I’m your sibling..”

They answered softly, as their eyes met, Crowley silently made a comment to himself, their eyes were the same shade of colour. The stranger’s uniform was unknown to him, trying to locate any school that had similar uniform.

Yuu was surprised by their answer, their eyes wide in confusion. They did look.. familiar, almost identical.

“… I’m sorry for not remembering you…”

“Why?… Why don’t you remember?”

They questioned whether this was even real, finding their sibling, only for them to not remember.

“I don’t remember anything that happened before coming here..”

Yuu revealed, sighing as they was about to explain, Crowley’s loud voice cut throughout the soft, broken atmosphere that settled on the two siblings.

“You can all talk this out at Ramshackle!”

he decided, grabbing both, which earned him a slap on the hand from MC. Giving him a glare that said “touch me and i’ll bite off your hand.”

Crowley quickly backed off, not liking this more feral version of Yuu. He cleared his throat, putting a hand over his chest, the other onto his hip.

“Because i’m so kind, i’ll let you, an another magicless human stay here! Aren’t I just the best?”

He laughed, turning around and walking away while singing praises to himself.

“Yeah, the best at being the worse… He’s like a worse version of Mammon…”

Mc mumbles, making Yuu chuckle softly. “You’ll get used to it after a while. C’mon, i’ll being you to your dormitory.. if you can call it that.” “Oh dear…”

Yuu chuckled, standing up and offering a hand down to them. “Shall we?”

they looked at their hand, a soft smile edging onto their lips. “You haven’t changed a bit..”

they chuckle, putting their hand into Yuu’s palm.

“We shall.”

With that, the story of the two siblings have begin..

(This is a small part because this is more of a starter than anything. Never the less, i hope you enjoyed it, Reader!)

[freyito]

Let’s see those Johnshi headcanons

MEEEE ??? YOU WANNA HEAR MYYYYYY JOHNSHI HEADCANONS?? (specifically asked for people to ask about them) TWIRLS HAIR...

anyways. building off the fact that I headcanon Johnny as Jewish... he's jewish by blood, right? like mother dearest was jewish (and we know hes got daddy issues...) but didnt really like practice much? like Chanukah was about as far as she'd go. HOWEVER. Johnny carries her Matzoh Ball Soup recipe with him at all times. Like it's a little faded list of ingredients in a lockbox with his social security card and birth certificate or something lmfao.

Johnny's got such a mediocre grip on cooking. But obviously you can't just live off of takeout and fancy restaurants your entire life. Johnny also really enjoys cooking but he also thinks cooking together is like real intimate and just a fun date. Kenshi and Johnny have definitely tried to cook together ONCE with Sento by so Kenshi can see... but then Kenshi like nicked his finger and Johnny freaked out so Johnny decided that was that. He'll cook Matzoh Ball soup for Kenshi like once a week but especially during the colder months cause it reminds him of the good parts of his childhood.

Johnny actually really loved Chanukah as a kid cause it was like a second christmas, so he celebrates it every year. The first Chanukah with Kenshi, Johnny was like super giddy... history nerd 100% so Johnny will like hype it up and tell him why Chanukah is important all day until finally it's time to light the candles!!! And Johnny doesn't know like ANY HEBREW... besides the Chanukah chant. Kenshi loves it when Johnny speaks in different languages (I imagine he knows a little cause of his career, but also like he's not fluent in like any of them) so to hear Johnny speak in Hebrew, Kenshi is like !!! WOAH!!! Probably asks Johnny to repeat it again and again...

[Spoilers for Johnny and Kenshi's Tower Ending] Johnny definitely bought Kenshi's groceries a LOT after coming back from outworld. Yeah yeah, they were most definitely in different countries but nothing a little modern day technology can't fix. Johnny also 100% pays Kenshi "surprise visits". Will drop way too much money on a ticket to Japan, do MORE shopping for Kenshi there, then show up at his door. Will also visit Kenshi at work as well, since I assume with both Johnny and Kenshi have such busy schedules, being a director and a OIA agent, they don't get much time together.

On that note, eventually when Johnny's whole divorce is settled and he's on his way to like a third Mortal Kombat movie and an animated film or something, Kenshi requests a transfer to California. Goes through EASILY, and that's when they start living together. By then, Johnny's gotten much better at cooking and like cooks for Kenshi whenever he can.

WE ALL KNOW Johnny's a certified yapper. And Kenshi's a listener, specifically for him. Kenshi will bring up stuff Johnny's said once upon a time and Johnny's like "you remembered!!!" cause not a lot of people really listen to Johnny...

Also. Johnny's got daddy issues. Kenshi's got mommy issues. They complete eachother.

I think a lot of people brush over the fact that Kenshi's definitely fuckin loaded too. Like he was a Yakuza, and now he's a government agent. He's got MONEY MONEY MONEY. So all the time after everything, Kenshi would send over gifts upon gifts to Johnny. They gradually decline in price. Not because he's getting cheaper, no! Kenshi's not much of a gift giver but I can imagine he feels pretty bad for Johnny cause he KNOWS Johnny STILL feels guilty about Kenshi losing his eyesight. Kenshi also believes the small things matter the most, and he starts sending over little things that remind him of Johnny. Only when he moves in with Johnny is when he stops gift giving. But we'll get to why later.

Neither are super picky with their food. But, Johnny hates tomatoes and pickles on burgers. Kenshi will eat them regardless. So Johnny purposefully makes sure that tomatoes and pickles are on whatever burgers he gets. (OLIVE THEORYYYY)

Also since I hced both w/ depression... Johnny normally just kind of. Can't function during hard episodes. He really just prefers to stay in bed and let it pass, cry it out a little. Kenshi on the other hand NEEDS something to do cause it helps him get it out, and he's got a pretty active mind, so a distraction is always needed. So Kenshi LOVES cleaning for Johnny during his episodes, he'll get so much laundry done, everything will like practically spotless. And it kind of helps Johnny's mood get better, too.

Kenshi sets aside like at least a week a month when he has time off to just. live life without Sento, if that makes sense? He'll set Sento aside and just deal with life with a cane, he doesn't mind it like at all. He wants to get comfortable with a cane as well because for very very very obvious reasons he can't bring Sento with him everywhere. Face Mapping also. Like every night. Johnny might complain a little cause Kenshi does it so often but he really loves it. Kenshi's got Johnny's face down, like absolutely down. But does it regardless cause he KNOWS Johnny loves it.

I'm still like 90% sure Kenshi is insecure of his tattoos but doesn't talk about them like at all and I mean I think he's pretty comfortable about his past completely. We hear him joke about it for fucks sake. But he does have a habit of covering up what he can of his tattoos. So on the days where Kenshi's just wearing like a tanktop or even no shirt at all, Johnny's all over his arms tracing his tattoos. Like they will be trapped laying on the couch for HOURS. Cause Johnny has to finish tracing EVERY INCH of Kenshi's tattoos. Kenshi won't ever admit that he likes it. And it's not like... erotic either. It's soft and tender. Johnny's just kind of fascinated. (Johnny also probably will take off his shirt like "now trace mine". he will always and forever have his name tattooed across his chest in my heart)

Their love resembles Ludus (Playful Love) the most. They definitely have some pretty tender and passionate moments, but I think Johnny just in general sets the tone for the relationship. Even if Kenshi is more Pragma (Enduring Love) aligned. Johnny kind of lets his humor take the lead, and Kenshi kind of enjoys it.

When Kenshi moved in, he brought Johnny some konpeitō. Johnny was hooked. Now Johnny has like 3 1lbs packs in the cabinets.

Kenshi 100% has a guide dog. And Johnny dotes on that thing and spoils that thing like a motherfucker...

And finally. After like atleast a year and a half of them living together, Kenshi proposes. Johnny HAD a ring and was ready to propose but he was so worried about it and about the time and he let his nerves get the best of him each and every time. Kenshi doesn't make it a big show... probably after a nice dinner and maybe some dancing. But he definitely set the whole day up. Johnny tries so hard not to cry at his proposal.

anyways. gay losers.

[hearts4leeknow]

Chicken Nuggets || Han Jisung x Reader

Genre: angst-fluff (hurt/comfort?)

Warning(s)?: hurtful words (hannie didnt mean it), Han is a little bit of a meanie (but he makes up for it)

Han Jisung x Reader

Summary: You storm off into you and Hannies shared bedroom with hurt feelings. Han knows he messed up but thinks an apology isn’t enough so he makes some chicken nuggets for you <3

a/n: My friends were giving me suggestions and this one is from my friend @ghostaurel <33

“you’re so clingy it’s suffocating you know? Can you not see I don’t wanna talk to you!”

Han’s words repeated in your head over and over again each time you heard it you’d let out a sob. Does he really think i’m that clingy? No, was the answer but his words earlier said otherwise. Han knew he was wrong as soon as the filthy words left his mouth, his heart hurt when he saw the tears build up in your eyes due to the words he had spewed, yet he couldn’t think in the moment so he said nothing else. He regrets saying nothing, it probably made him look worse but he cant do anything to change that now, the past is the past. Jisung spent the first 10 minutes alone in the living room thinking about how to apologize, he felt tears brim up in his eyes, he felt terrible. He didn’t mean it he just couldn’t come up with any song ideas for their new album coming out soon. Jisung knew it wasnt an excuse, he also knows a simple ‘i’m so sorry’ or ‘i’m sorry’ won’t fix anything. He already has hurt your feelings twice this week due to stress, his sorry wont mean anything to you and he knew it. So he decided to do more this time, make a midnight snack for the two of you to enjoy together to finally spend time together after him staying in the studio for who knows how long. It was the least he could do.

Chicken Nuggets, is the first thing that came to mind when he thought of foods and snacks you liked. And so that’s what he made. Han saw some dino nuggets in the freezer so he defrosted them and put them into the toaster oven to heat up, he then went ahead and attempted to make star nuggets for you. He wasn’t very good at cooking like the other members but Jisung tried. He collected all the ingredients whisking, stirring and pouring ingredients. Finally he looked at the clock, 1:47AM he read. Are you even still awake? he wondered, his question was answered when he heard the bedroom door unlock revealing a tired, teary eyed, you.

“Baby! I made some dino and star nuggets for you as an apology because I assumed an ‘im sorry’ wouldn’t be enough for the damage I caused and the hurt I caused you..” He looked down feeling ashamed.

“Hmmh” You hummed in response, walking towards the dining table sitting yourself down.

“I am really sorry, I didn’t mean any of those horrible words I said to you. I said them in the heat of the moment and it wasn’t right of me. I’ve just had no ideas for songs and it’s been stressing me out since the deadline of those are in 2 weeks, yes I know it’s no excuse for what I said. I lashed out again, and I promise i’ll change for the better, for you. I’m really sorry baby!” Jisung apologized tears filling up his boba eyes yet again, his tone of voice and eyes practically begging for him to be forgiven. He was guilty and you could tell, his body language said it all.

“Hannie, it’s okay and I understand I was prying you a lot and probably disturbing you, but you know I care for you and whenever you feel stressed take a breather and talk to me about it next time instead of building it up and lashing out on me?” You give a small smile showing you do forgive him.

“Yes, I promise to talk to you and take breaks next time! I just can’t guarantee this won’t happen again in the future, but I will do everything I can to prevent it!” He had tears rolling down his face but he held a proud smile. In that moment he heard a ‘ding!’ meaning the dino and star nuggets were done! Jisung took them out and put them on a plate for you and him to share.

“Ji! don’t forget about the ketchup meteorite!” You giggle watching Jisung pull open the fridge looking for the ketchup bottle.

“Ji to your right on the door of the fridge.” You smile at his confused state frantically trying to find the ketchup. He let out a small ‘ohh’ and opened the lid forcing some ketchup out of the bottle.

“ahh” You said waiting for him to feed you a chicken nugget.

“Okay wait” Jisung quickly went to wash his hands speeding back and dipping a Star nugget into the ketchup feeding it to you.

“This is the one I made, how is it babe?” He questioned trying to tell by your expression.

Your eyes light up, “Woah, this is actually amazing” Your voice was muffled due to the fact you’re still chewing.

“Thank you Ji-baby!” You have a bright smile and a peck on the cheek as a reward.

“The least I could baby~” He gave you a sly smirk, giving you a kiss on the nose.

“try one!” You hold up a star nugget up to his lips waiting for him to take a bite.

“Mmm, you’re right it is good..” Jisung looked at you with his cheeks stuffed with chicken nuggets.

“You’re a cutie you know that!” You poke his cheek earning a pout from poor Jisung. You shoved two dino nuggets into your mouth mimicking Han.

“AWWW, you’re cuter babe!” He squealed with his loud persona, as your face flushed a light pink.

“Baby…I love you. You know that right?” Han expressed, in a calmer matter.

“Yes Hannie, and you know, I love you too” You two shared a kiss full of love and passion. That’s how your night went on, laughs and giggles were to be heard as you and Jisung were having the time of your lives in the dining room at now 2:57AM not yet asleep.

-FIN-

a/n: i’m actually really proud of this one! Lmk if you guys want more things like this!

[jmdbjk]

He wears his heart on his sleeve

...maybe he should just get it tattooed there too.

Jungkookie was very quiet and reflective during his most recent Weverse live, at least at first.

Perhaps he was manifesting his Jimin to appear in the comments because he stared at them for a while... a long while.

Earlier in the evening, with Tae, he attended the movie premiere of Dream, a soccer movie with a ragtag team storyline. A team of misfits who come together and persevere. It stars Tae's friend, Park Seojoon, Wooga squad and fellow cast member on Jinny's Kitchen.

He looked happy to be there but self-conscious at the same time. Unused to the crowds and spotlight after being out of it for a while. He didn't have anyone to hide behind. It looks like maybe he said "oh my god" when he stepped up in front of the bank of cameras (haha).

After having a supposedly fun outing, Kookie came to visit us on Weverse live and seemed to have a lot on his mind. He said he missed us and wished us good health both physically and mentally. I imagine Hobi leaving for service and Moonbin's tragedy last week are fresh cuts to our Kookie's heart. It breaks MY heart that Kookie has to experience those things. I don't know how close Kookie was to Moonbin. But I do know losing someone so suddenly can make you so scary aware of your own mortality and makes you realize instantly what should truly be important and what is irrelevant.

I am thinking his evening out had him keyed up and he came to visit with us in order to decompress and relax. He said the only ones who could create a calming environment for him right now was Army. However, the (I'm sure inane) comments he was seeing were not doing the trick. He seemed a little perturbed at them so he turned them off.

But he said sitting there knowing we were on the other side was calming and enough for him at that moment. He felt at peace knowing we are all connected. And then he let out a big sigh. Sort of a "I'm doing the best I can" sigh. Oh Kookie, I feel you.

Incidentally, the song he said he was obsessed with that evening and that he had playing in the background on repeat was I Really Want to Stay At Your House by Rosa Walton & Hallie Coggins ... some of the lyrics:

Another evening I'll be sitting reading in between your lines Because I miss you all the time...

...I'm on top of you, I don't wanna go 'Cause I really wanna stay at your house

He said he's working hard on new music but its difficult. If he says its not easy, then the final result will probably be OUTSTANDING because he struggled to make HIS version of perfect. Masterpieces are sometimes not easy to create.

He was steadily sinking, sitting in the dark, sipping his highball through a straw but after 35 minutes of solemnity and saying he needed to go to sleep, he all of a sudden came alive when he began talking about food... go figure.

He waffled back and forth about whether he should just get off his butt and make the noodles or go to sleep, but then he really got into it and explained in great detail this recipe, down to the proper color of the perilla oil to use. Though he didn't have the correct perilla oil in his pantry, he made the sauce and boiled the noodles.

The whole idea of him puttering around his kitchen trying out new ways to make noodle or rice dishes is very endearing. He does have somewhat of a head start in advanced levels of cooking though because of the times they filmed Run BTS episodes with Chef Paik. He learned important cooking procedures like "reduce" the liquid in the pan and desirable "viscosity" of the sauce.

When he's into it, HE. IS. INTO. IT. He adjusted his recipe, repeated the ratios of ingredients, explained in great detail every step.

Please. Someone just hug him. JIMIN COME GET YOUR MAN.

[simp-is-here]

Unrequited: Solomon x Reader

Summary: Solomon can’t hold back his feelings any longer, he needs to tell you

(This is basically like when your teacher used to tell you to do something in your own words, yeah that’s this with Lauries first failed proposal. Some things are also skipped over with the movie scene to fit this better)

Jesus I didn’t realize how short this was, it seemed a lot longer when writing it, anyways enjoy

Warning: sad, unrequited love, rejection, slight nightbringer spoilers

•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~

You and Solomon had gotten back from shopping, whilst unloading the groceries into the kitchen you could feel Solomons eyes on you.

“Take a picture it lasts longer.” You joked, not looking at him while you get ingredients for supper out

Solomon let out a chuckle, reaching up to put something onto one of the cupboards.

“Sorry.” He says in amusement, scratching the back of his neck

“Anyways, what’re you’re plans for the rest of your day?” You asked, turning to face him whilst leaning on the counter

Solomon was ready to just shut himself away in his study, ready to dive into spell books to take his mind off of how happy you looked with the brothers today.

You had began taking out some things to cook with, turning back away from him while chopping some vegetables.

“What is it? You look like you’re about to burst.” You laughed, always loving the chances to poke fun at him

“I have something I need to admit.” He said firmly, turning around to face your back

“What? Finally get that pact with Lucifer?” you joked, laughing at your own joke as you looked back at him

His serious expression caused your face to fall, in your heart you knew what he was gonna say, the thought made you shake your head while stumbling back a bit

“No.” You simply say, walking out of the kitchen in a rush

“It’s no use, please just hear me out.” He quickly caught up to you stepping in front of you while a hand clenched the fabric of his shirt over his heart

“I have loved you ever since I’ve known you, I couldn’t help it.” He pleaded, following you as you continue walking

“I’ve always wanted to tell you but you were constantly surrounded by all of them, which is fine. But now we’re alone and I must get an answer cause I can not go on like this any longer!” For once in his life he sounded desperate, his hand gentle grabbing your arm to stop you from running anymore

“Sol, please just stop.” You begged, knowing the inevitable that lies ahead

“I gave up my scheming, I gave up everything you didn’t like. It’s good, I’m happy I did. And I watched and waited and never complained because I- well I figured you love me.” Solomons voice cracked, a hand coming up to wipe his nose while his eyes became red and puffy

You just kept shaking your head, quietly begging him to stop talking before he ends up hurt.

“And I realize I’m not this great man-“

“You are a great man, you’re too great. And I just- we’re just too different. I mean look at us! And we’d fight, we can’t help it even now.” Your words had cut him deep, your friendly grip on his shoulder to reassure him just hurt more

“You’d hate my pestering and I couldn’t handle your secrets, and we’d wish we’d never been together.” You tried to explain to him, trying your best to make him see the problems that would lie ahead

“I love you.” He repeated over and over again, trying to get the point across

Tears formed in your eyes as you looked down, swallowing the lump in your throat uou finally say it

“I can’t love you like you want me too, I’m sorry.”

Solomon let some tears escape, backing up a bit from you while shaking his head. A realization hitting him.

"It's because of them isn't it?"

"......no, no no. I just, I just think I’m ready for anything right now." You lie under your breath, your heart clenched in your chest like the tight grip of sorrow was slowly bleeding into it

"Yes you are, cause the moment we get back you'll jump into their arms and fight the world to never be apart again...” his voice had gotten so quiet it almost gave you whiplash.

Solomon was longer looking at you, instead his gaze was on the ground while his eyes glossed over like freshly cleaned glass.

“…and I'll watch."

You tried to reach out to him at his broken tone but he instead just walked away, the closing of the door was all that was heard as you stood there in silence. Tears beginning to fall down your face the farther and farther he got from you….why did he have to fall in love with you? Why couldn’t he have spared himself of this heartache? Cause now…..

….Now you’ve lost him

[watatsumiis]

Some Pantalone headcanons <3

Some of my personal headcanons for Pantalone below the cut since my dash is flooded with him at the moment (as it should be)

Content warning for intrusive thoughts, mentions of skin/hair picking/pulling, compulsions, possible disordered eating.

Disclaimer: I write Pantalone as having OCD in this, please be aware that these traits aren't shared by everyone who has OCD, this is a set of headcanons that I have made based on personal experience and research, not a diagnostic list or a generalisation.

Pantalone has OCD - though he masks very well and keeps up his cool, unphased charade when around others, spending any significant amount of time around him and observing his behaviours makes it fairly clear.

He struggles quite badly with skin picking especially, his arms and shoulders are marked with faint scars, as well as his face, but he uses makeup to conceal it. This habit is a bit part of the reason why he wears gloves, so that it's harder for him to do so. He can sometimes get snappy with people who try to verbally remind him not to pick, but his anger is more directed at himself than anyone else, he just projects it outwards as a way of hiding his insecurities surrounding his struggles.

He twirls his hair absently, and occasionally may pick at his eyebrows or eyelashes when he's extremely stressed and overwhelmed. Sometimes he ends up with a tangled, matted fringe just because of how much he pulls and twirls at it.

Pantalone struggles back and forth with the way he views people like cleaners and cooks - logically he knows they are their own people, with their own families and quirks, but there's some part of his brain that just can't cope with that. He needs the 'relationship' to be purely transactional, almost clinical in nature - he can't know anything about the people who do those sorts of jobs, or else it just gnaws at his mind and wears on him until he has some kind of breakdown thanks to it. The more detached the worker, the better he copes. He doesn't know the name of his personal chef, or the person who cleans his quarters, and he likes it that way. He pays them handsomely and makes sure they're treated well, but no more than that.

His food needs to be prepared a certain way, by a certain person. He dislikes cooking for himself since it takes an obscenely long time due to the fact that he gets caught up with hygiene. He only trusts a small handful of restaurants, and sometimes he'll send subordinates in to scope out kitchens in places where he'll be staying. If they don't meet his standards, or he has an 'off' feeling about them, he'll bring his own food, which often ends up with him living off of preserves when he's on long trips where he can't bring his personal chef.

Observing closely, a fair amount of his rituals and compulsions can be traced back to his poor upbringing - he's picky with food due to repeated bouts of food poisoning due to poor quality ingredients and cooking conditions when he was young, he can't stand uncleanliness thanks to sicknesses caused directly by bad living conditions, he's strict when locking doors and windows due to repeated break-ins when he lived in a poorer neighbourhood.

He has a 'circular' way of sorting and working on things, he can work on a lot of papers at once, they just have to be in the right order, so he can flit in a clockwise direction through them all, switching seamlessly between each one without getting them mixed up.

Nobody can touch or clean his desk except for him - though it may look 'messy' at first glance, he understands it all perfectly and will know immediately if anything gets moved at all.

He keeps himself carefully detached from most people, he often views non-professional relationships as complicated and messy. He plays up his 'snooty' attitude as a defense mechanism to keep people away from him.

He can sometimes tolerate La Signora's company (after some light 'reconnaissance' missions into her quarters). They have similar tastes in wine, cheeses, and fruits and will sometimes share gossip.

Despite his haughty attitude, all of the people who work under him have good pay and benefits, and due to that, there's often a lot of people fighting over applying to work for him instead.

He always respects everyone equally upon meeting them, no matter their appearance or background - lots of people spread rumours about him being cruel and mean to the poor for the sake of it, but that couldn't be further from the truth.

He often makes large anonymous donations to organisations that he knows are good and trustworthy.

Please don't repost, steal, copy or otherwise plagarise my writing! This includes posting translations to other sites.

[pentition]

Sometimes I feel like a character like Pen has almost too much potential for a game like mtas. There is only so much you can do with him in that setting otherwise they game might get too complicated. Although I'd love a game in the my time universe as complex as bg3 i doubt that will ever be a thing. But Pen would have been perfect for such a game.

I feel you on this, tbh. I've seen a lot of characters be 'too big' for whatever story/media they were in and not given the proper attention they should have had.

However, I do think because of that, it had spawned some amazing things from within the community. Potential and imagination go hand in hand so well! So even if Pathea drops the ball down the line, at least there's that.

What I love about the My Time series is it kind of gives me that same vibe that Adventure Time initially did. Colorful, silly, never taking itself too seriously - but there's still a serious plot going on and still serious things with the characters. Pathea doesn't lean into that seriousness or horror elements like the show did, but it could certainly stand to do so at any time and it wouldn't feel strange, imo.

We already have strong talking points in the series. Humanity's history (war, technological growth, fallout), artificial intelligence, the apocalypse and what it did to humanity and everything else that got mutated from it, nonhuman sentient species (both as enemies and those we think to be enemies, like Geeglers). The Church of Light usually is where most of the seriousness surrounds, due to why it was established and their beliefs revolving around the fear of history repeating itself if humanity is left unchecked.

Then on a character level, we get serious themes like with Gust and Ginger. Or, of course, Pen. To bring it back to the main topic, haha. But I can see if Pathea wanted to add a little more seriousness to their games as the series progresses, it would work just fine and they wouldn't lose anything. All the ingredients are there and I didn't even list them all.

I fully agree that Pen's potential is more than what MTaS could allow for, which is sad. And it's also why I would have loved a DLC/expansion for Sandrock to continue with him. But I also understand he's being reserved for a future installment, which is also exciting. I hope by the time he returns to the series, they have figured out a way to maximize his potential better. It may not be in full, but I'm hoping the reception (both players that adore him and players that don't) is all taken into account for him and his development.

And yes. I would LOSE IT to have a My Time game with BG3 levels of detail. Pen would be so incredible in that type of game. The character who joins the party, you roll your eyes at his one-liners in combat and don't take him seriousness until sometimes arises that makes you reevaluate him in your party. Then you realize you don't actually know the guy. He's just loud when others are looking his way but somehow oddly quiet and to himself when it comes to sharing anything of depth. It would be so cool to unravel the mystery of Pen is that type of game.

Also in a My Time game. The good news is, Pathea does learn from their games and audience feedback. It may not be perfect, ofc, but I'm hoping that continues to track and they take Pen more seriously as a character. I hope 'fans not being disappointed' isn't for fans who hate him and want Logan (and Howlett) avenged - but for people who like his character already.

Which I think is an important thing. People who like his character already. It's something to keep in mind if you're someone/a team that relies on the audience's opinions or alters content based on audience opinion. To be fair, I love it half the time. Cause at the same time, when it's not evenly fair across the board it's not the greatest feeling for fans that are left out.

But man, now you really go me thinking of Pen in a BG3 style game.

[grandeoatmilklatte]

A Little Rain Never Hurt Anyone ☔️

Here’s my contribution to the themed Weasley Wednesdays that have started up thanks to the lovely Garreth Discord. The theme was “Wet” so hopefully I did this justice!

A Little Rain Never Hurt Anyone - Garreth x F!MC (house neutral)

18+ Smut/NSFW - characters aged up and in 7th year! 

1.2k words

Summary: A date in the woods gets very wet very quickly. Not sure how else to summarize this hahaha!

---

It was a gorgeous day when you looked out the window when you got up this morning. Not a rain cloud in the sky. 

You even made sure that it wasn’t going to rain before you even stepped foot out of the castle. Because you wouldn’t have made the plans you had made if you thought for even a second that it was going to rain. 

You didn’t bother to dress for rain, because it WASN’T SUPPOSED TO RAIN TODAY. 

And yet, here you were, in the middle of the Forbidden Forest, with Garreth Weasley, getting RAINED ON. 

Back when you thought it was going to be a beautiful Saturday, the two of you agreed to go foraging for potion ingredients in the forest. You did this a lot, it was actually one of your favorite date activities. You had made it pretty far into the forest before it had started raining, and you weren’t carrying your brooms with you because you liked the walk, the two of you holding hands and talking about absolutely nothing while you walked. 

It wasn’t downpouring at least, but you were getting pretty wet. You were pretty frustrated about it, while Garreth seemed to be laughing it off. He was always much more laid back than you, and made light of most situations you two found yourself in. It’s part of why you loved him so much. 

“Hmmm. I LOVE it when you’re wet, baby!” He said with a hearty laugh. You rolled your eyes at him, but you had a smile on your face. Actually, you loved HIM when he was wet. You both had made the mistake of wearing white button down shirts today, his currently clinging to his body, where you could see the outline of his toned stomach. All you could think about was how good he looked like this and all you wanted to do was…

No. You were not about to get aroused in the middle of a rainstorm in the Forbidden Forest. 

“Ugh. We should probably get moving, see if we can find a cave or something to wait this out.” You said, ignoring the way he was running his hand through his soaked hair to get it out of his face. He was so gorgeous, you knew you had to occupy your mind with something otherwise you were going to jump on him.

You continued walking deeper into the forest, since you didn’t remember seeing any caves or cover earlier on. You were walking for a couple more minutes before the rain started coming down harder. Garreth had been trailing behind you, and when you turned to him with an annoyed look on your face, his eyes went straight to your chest. His glistening green eyes went dark and lustful, and a smirk was slowly forming on his face. You looked down at yourself, once again remembering your mistake of wearing a white shirt today. You also remembered that you hadn’t worn anything underneath the white shirt. It was then you realized what Garreth was looking at, your nipples making their presence known. Your cheeks felt hot, and you could once again feel arousal creeping up on you. 

Garreth approached you and brought a hand up to your chest, his index finger teasing one of your nipples through the wet shirt, which caused both of your nipples to harden further. He repeated the same action with your other nipple, and began to kiss you deeply as he teased you. You hummed against his lips, deciding that your day couldn’t get any worse, so you might as well have some fun. You threw your arms around him, and without breaking the kiss, you walked backwards into a nearby tree so you could lean your back against it. The tree’s dense branches actually provided some, but not full coverage from the rain. Something was something though, and you couldn’t care less about the rain right now, as you had a more important wetness to deal with right now. 

Garreth released your lips to start kissing at your neck, which drew a moan out of you. You knew there would be no one in the forest with this rain, so you were free to be as loud as you wanted. Without removing his lips from your neck, Garreth unbuttoned your shirt, tossing it onto the ground. His mouth then latched onto your hard nipple, roughly sucking at it as his hand continued to tease the other one. Moans continued to fall from your lips as his free hand began working you out of your pants and underwear. You helped him with this, and once you were stripped down, you moved to help him out of his clothes. 

Now, you were both naked, wet, and freezing, but neither of you were thinking straight. You both threw your arms around each other, pulling yourselves into another passionate kiss before Garreth grabbed your shoulders and forcefully turned you around so that your front was facing the tree. You placed your hands on the tree as he put one hand on your back and the other on your hip, pushing your back down and your hips out, so that you were bent over against the tree. Your teeth had begun to chatter now, but you knew you’d be getting relief soon enough, as you felt Garreth rub himself along your folds. “You ready for me, baby girl?” he asked softly. “Yes!” you answered breathlessly. He let out a dark chuckle before he roughly slid himself inside, sliding into you deeply. This brought a groan out of you, and he began to wildly thrust in and out of you. Loud, aggressive moans were falling from both of your lips as he dug his fingers into your hips. You started meeting his thrusts as well, eager for you both to find a quick release. 

Garreth then removed one of his hands from your hips to bring it up to your hair. You had your hair up in a ponytail for your adventure today, which he took a hold of and roughly pulled as he continued to drive you to release. He took his other hand off your hip as well, using this hand to smack your ass. Hard. Multiple times. Your moans had turned to screams of pleasure at this point, while his moans had turned to growls, your sounds echoing off the forest walls. 

Your release hit you like the Hogwarts Express, leaving you panting and grasping the tree in front of you for dear life, your legs ready to give out on you. Garreth’s release came right after yours, as you felt his hot liquid fill you. The two of you stopped moving but remained in the same positions for a few moments, trying to catch your breath. You grabbed the tree to help yourself stand up, and you turned back to Garreth, who had a satisfied look on his face. 

“Well, at least this day turned around!” You said as you flashed him a smile. “See? A little rain never hurt anyone!” He flashed a smile right back at you. You begrudgingly got dressed in your still very wet clothes. The rain had actually subsided by this point, being reduced to a drizzle, but you decided to call it a day here, accepting the ingredients you already had in order to hurry up and get back to the castle. You started your walk back, hand in hand. 

You couldn’t wait to get back to get rid of your wet clothes and change into something dry. Maybe then the two of you could have a round two that was a little less wet.

---

[mbti-notes]

Hi, do you have some adices for diffrent types before christmas? I am ENTJ and I will spend christmas with ISFJs and ISTJs. In the past, I felt a lot of alienation in family life, often with a difference of opinion I felt that I was "me" versus "them." I would like to have a good relationship with them while feeling good about myself.

It's unfortunate that some people don't feel safe in family but rather feel stuck with a family they never chose. Some family members don't turn out to be very compatible with you for reasons such as the one you stated of being too different or having too many differences of opinion.

When children feel alienated, there is a reason for it. You have not specified the reason, which means it's difficult for me to understand what the root of the problem is. Obviously, your family has not understood you to the degree you desire, nor you them, but why? What is the obstacle between you exactly? Can't solve a problem without targeting the cause.

Since you are vague, I can only give you a generalized response. Family relationships get very complicated when there is a long history of unresolved issues between members. As problems are continually swept under the rug, past hurt can linger on indefinitely. Most adults try to carry on with life using an "out of sight, out of mind" attitude but then get shocked by how deeply they are impacted by the unresolved issues every time they come face-to-face with family.

Ideally, the best thing to do is approach each other as the more mature individuals you are today, rather than from the perspective of the individuals you were in the past. This makes it easier to communicate about unresolved issues calmly, work toward mutual understanding, and eventually resolve them to mutual satisfaction. Only then can everyone heal and move on with a clean slate.

Unfortunately, resolution is difficult to achieve because it rests on the assumption that everyone involved has actually matured to some degree, at least enough to look back at old problems with greater objectivity. In reality, this isn't always the case. In reality, it's easy to regress and become that child again, feeling hurt and alone. In reality, it's easy for everyone to just repeat old patterns of conflict.

No matter how much you want to heal a relationship, it isn't possible as long as there isn't a matching willingness and commitment from every party involved. Hope for improvement can only be sustained when every party cares enough about the relationship to try and make it work. Do your family members display such willingness and commitment? If so, good. Then you need only remember that the key ingredient of healthy relationships is kindness. No matter what you need to say or do, always proceed with kindness first and foremost, and the rest will work itself out in due time.

In cases where there isn't enough willingness and commitment from them to resolve past issues, the best thing to do is set appropriate boundaries to protect yourself from getting hurt again. This means learning to handle relationships with more nuance and skillfulness:

Take responsibility for your feelings and emotions so that you act upon them in kind, reasonable, and constructive ways.

Speak only from your own perspective when communicating and avoid casting judgment and blame.

Put categories in place to ensure you classify each individual appropriately with regard to how intimate/close you should or shouldn't get to them.

Put rules in place to ensure that you do not invest more than you get in return.

Explain to people what is and isn't acceptable when interacting with you and what will happen when they behave inappropriately.

Enforce reasonable consequences in the event that your preferences, rules, or boundaries get violated.

Dealing successfully with family means rising above and being the adult in the room even when others can't, even when they are pressuring you to be your childish self. Refusing to participate in old relationship dynamics is the way to stop replaying them. Are you capable of it? No matter what happens, it'll be good practice. I always approach big family gatherings as a challenge. I challenge myself to put into practice all the things I've learned about how to be a good person. In the event of failures, I learn from them and try something different the next time. Happy holidays and good luck to you!

[aamethyst000]

Feeling more productive, everyday (May 6,24 - 7:19pm)

Ever since i bought this laptop, i have been noticing that i am a little more productive in the house hold. i'm getting up a lot more easier to do my chores (altough i'm still bitchy about it but i'm still doing said chores while being bitchy about it lmao), i actually drew something on my laptop! not to mention i am actually cooking dinner on time......ish. its still better than starting at 9pm to finally cook dinner. Anyway, my litlle brother and i are going tp head up to the store in a bit to grab some ingredients and snacks for tonight. i am making meat loaf and rice tonight!~ I do want to mention, that i am still struggling with my sleep schedule, going to bed at 4-5 in the morning, then getting up at 2-3 the next day, rinse and repeat. i dont know how i'm still functioning right now. At the moment, i'm running on 2 cups of coffee and one meal, i call that a win in my book. I'm still debating on whether or not i really want to buy the boox palma when i can do the exact same thing on my phone, just with a different screen and no texting. The boox palma runs on android, thank god. I think that why i want it so much, is to have a seperate device to read on. now that i have a different device to write my journals in.

8:17pm - my little brother and i just got home from the store, now i am going to start cooking our dinner tonight and watch some shera on netflix! then i think im going to play conkers bad fur day after supper <3

9:37pm - Dinner is almost done and i washed a few plate n forks that we need, now i am just watching shera while dinner is cooking. i'm on my third cup of coffee and i have been yelled at by my uncles cat ever since i came back from the store, poor thing lmao he just wants my attention. only in my room though, it doesnt seem to be the same im im in the kitchen or in the living room. it doesnt make sense to me but it does to the kitty, so i try not to fight with him, its hard to do so when i have stuff to do throughout the day. My kitty was the same way ysterday, all clingy and shit, not that i minded, i really love it when they are like that. it cheers me up.

honestly though, this feels so much better writing my journals here than on paper. at least this way, my laptop has a passowrd that no one in the house can get into. though it kind of sucks that it is a requirement to change my password every few months. why they even set it up like that is beyond me. i wonder what it'll be like if and when i actually go to a cafe and type out my journal entries there. its noce to imagine, but at the same time, the crowd would overwhelm me lmao then again, it's something i should get used to if i want to go back to work again. i just wish that the places i work at dont fckn ghost me, if and when they decide to let me go. that would be nice fir once. especially if i did something wrong to be let go like that. like, why are they even allowed to do that? but when the employees do that, just up and leave the work place or quit on the spot, we get go on the list of "do not hire"? kind of stupid isnt it?

i think im about to go on a rant in a sec, so i'm going to do something else, see if i still feel the same way about it later on. if i do, i'll talk about it here lol

9:56pm - now that i got that out of my system, i still feel the same way, i just dont feel the need to rant about it. i think ill just sit on this feeling and think about it. considering that there is nothing that i can personally do, to change said circumstances. anyway, change of subject, im finally listening to audio books now! since it got onto spotify, ive been taking advantage of it and i am so happy that i am! i think thats part of the reason why i have been feeling a little motivated today. i think im starting to love audio books now, im thinking of dowloading the app later on, or as soon as i can get a stable and steady job again, cause this is getting ridiculous, even for me.if i was living on my own, id either be on the streets or back to living with my mother again. reality sucks but oh well, what can i do other than look for another job. the village sucks for job hunting, especially if its just the canery, brighter feature, and assistant teacher. 2 of those i do not like because it involvles interacting with kids, which i am not used of. the other involves 12-14 hours of just standing there or stacking. not a lot of choices for me to choose from, thats for sure. i used to work at the clinic but they havent called me back in nearly a year. same with the school, after the pandemic started, i was never called back. hence why i wanted to rant about the whole " work places just up and ghost you" bullshit. stuff like that really annoy me so much. which is why i am so worried about moving, what if pg does the same? i look for a job for months, never get hired, be expected to pay rent each month i am unepmloyed AND buy myself groceries. not to mention the transportation, the area id live in and if every single one of them just fucking ignore me. since ive been planning this with my best friend, i told her about wanting to save up enough to pay 3 to 4 months of rent, have enough for groceries, and a few furniture if we find a place that needs it. she took note of it after i told her my olfer brothers experience and mine. it can be really stressful when no one hires you. it really makes you think if any of that, is because of whats on your resume, or what i say in most of my interviews, i dont even feel comfortable lying to them, just so i can get the bloody job and start making and saving money. like ive been planning for so many years. i just wish that adulting is so much easier. but that would be too much to ask of our prime minister. selfsih piece of shit. Anyway, dinner is nearly done cooking so i am going to go back to watching shera and enjoy our late dinner, again. i like that i started typing a lot more here than i did on my phone. i love it, i almost dont want to stop, almost.

12:07am - we have just finished having our supper and MY G O D was supper ever so yummy~ i couldnt finish my plate so i think im going to give the rest to my little brother, but at the same time. i want to keep it for myself for when i get hunry for it again. i think im going to go bath tonight and then set up my trans tape for tomorrow. ill be buying more i think next week wen i have more money in my bank. which, btw, i need to go down to the band office and take out cash again. cause honestly, i want to stop myself from spending so much money in one go. i want to get better at that, i will acknowledge, though, that i have been doing really well on not spending so much. i managed to save more than enough after the rupert trip with my littlw brother. im really proud of that <3

12:36am - i am going to get ready for a bath now, had my 4th (forth) cup of coffee and 0 (zero) cups of water. i gotta catch up on that one. i used to be able to keep up with my water intake. well, except for when i was a teen, i hated the taste of plain water, so i remember avoiding drinking water unless absolutley necessary, which, at the time, was kind of rare for me to do. i was drinking one to two cups of water every other day. i was an absolutely stubborn child, i hated being wrong lmao i still kind of do, actually. im just not as stubborn as i was before, at least not to the point where im putting my health on the line. so yeah, i guess i still hate being wrong most times lmao

should i bring this up in my therapy appointment? i think i should. or rather, i feel like i should, but i dont want to. i just want to make the appointment again, and just fckn rant my therapist ear right out. maybe ill feel better afterwards and be better on my own time schedule management with my friends and family. i was so afraid to become that adult who is almost never home, drinking and doing ddrugs a lot, to the point where someone may take advantage of me at my lowest. however that may look. that i stayed home way more than a normal person considers "normal". i dont know how else to put it. i just know that my best friend is very sick of it and so am i. im 25 going to be turning 26 this year and i should and want to act like it for once in my life. i know that, physically, im no longer a teenager anymoe but in my brain, im jumping from 14, 16,17 and18 all in one go it seems. but i think ill save this topic for another time. kekekekekekeke

good night, readers! <3