#if i had a time machine my god
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god every time i see a gifset of tgc with his natural blond hair i get so horrifically angry at the stupid domina show all over again
#personal#if i had a time machine my god#i'm body snatching whoever made that show and radically changing it#we DESERVE to see tgc play blond pretty boy octavian (*which he was*) and then watch him have sad wet eyes#about the myriad of parental figures who are about to die in a very short time#he could have killed it in the role he could have been the definite portrayal of someone who never gets any fair treatments#like on par with natalie dormer as anne boleyn on that level#but nooooooooo#the stupid domina show stuck that ugly mop on his head and called it a wig and bungled the history for a duller story#tgc i'll avenge you do you wanna keep playing octavian cuz if i get money i can make that happen for you#in a better and more historically accurate way which'll be more fun
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the herald awakens
hehe sketches and alt versions under the cut !!!
#with the power of gay sex#gay mind sex#or somethinf#idk#aka oh my fucking god i love you machine herald desifn#arcane made me draw something for rhe first time in 8 months#the power of hyperfixation#viktor arcane#the machine herald#arcane spoilers#arcane season 3#i took some creative liberties but i just had the craziest ideas#his design is so cool 😭#jayvik#arcane#covering all my bases#sorin's art
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“hold on to your heart” // do me a favour live at forest hills stadium new york 08/09/23 ♡
#i miss the car era alex so badly 🥺#god help me i’ve been comfort watching 2023 shows to comfort myself today bc i’m stuck in bed with the worst period pain#but all it’s done is made me nearly cry over that video of alex with the little toy car and miss them all so much my heart aches 😭😭#i wish i had a time machine so i could go back and relive my show all over again#they’re just… absolute magic 💗💗💗#also#can we please talk about alex’s fluffy little lion mane of hair during the car tour??#i know it gets a lot of love but imo still not nearly as much as it deserves#i mean#just look at him?? 🥺#okay i need to stop now before i reduce myself to tears again#i’m too emotionally fragile for this today 😩#alex turner#arctic monkeys#the car era#alex gifs#my gifs#lulu posts
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phew ok starting off brokeweek (???) day one with the darlingest monk birds belonging to @itsonlypolite and @wysteriaisapenguin! drawing them together gave me so much delight - thank you for bringing them into this world. a thousand kisses for them ♡♡
🫴 also a transparent version incase you want a little jpeg doll of your child
#art is amazing holy shit i get to draw my beloved on his way to pumpkin carve with himself#i feel like the symphony dolphin rn#silly thing but i gave politebroken a regular kitchen knife for the pumpkin until i realized that looked really bad akdjahqbq#im so glad poli mentioned they struggled with drawing their broken cos god this struggle city for me again#here i was. tears in my eyes. wishing i had a time machine to learn drawing animals in my youth as i desperately redrew cutest guy ever#wysteriabroken is also so darling too literally texted my gf how cute he is like 5x#look at him!!! the definition of baobi!!#slay the princess#♡. scribbles#voice of the broken#i. i don't wanna call this brokeweek but i have no clue what to tag this awuehwhq#ill rack my brain but if anyone wants to submit smth i'm open
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LSTR-S2301 and the maintenance tunnel ARAR are best friends to me even though that Elster was only on sierpinski for a seemingly brief time, they’re bros who fuck around on the clock during work. I think Elster was probably more willing to put extra time in however she’s also very “okay you’ve given me a list of tasks I did them. They’re done and done well. That’s it, my time now.” Whereas I see Ara being more of a slacker (very valid of her) or at the very least just a bare minimum type of gal when it comes to work.
Idk I tend to imagine them fucking off in the middle of shifts to go find weird lonely corners of sierpinski to hang out in. They don’t even talk half the time but they love it.
#listen I know sierpinski Elster has Alina as her lover#I don’t necessarily see Elster/ara as romantic although it could be#they’re just tired work bros to me#u have machine autism and plant autism and they’re both silent types I think they’d click#I’ve seen some fun takes on Lilith and Elster as characters too#to me Lilith Itou is definitely the strong silent type but not bc she always means to be#yes she is an intimidating war veteran but I think part of that intimidation factor comes from her being awkward as hell when it comes#to talking#combo of awkward/ just being a woman of few words anyway#which comes through in LSTRs I think#they don’t say much when they don’t feel that they need to ig#anyway idk if this makes sense I’m just rambling#I was also just trying to think abt LSTR-S2301 bc poor thing#imagine being your own individual replika but you’re brought to this place as basically a sacrificial lamb? of sorts#in that you as you are. it’s not what you need to be for a god’s purpose#but it’s close enough that the parts that aren’t needed can be stripped away#and filled again#she was only ever meant to be a vessel for 512 in many ways#but she was still S2301 and had her own life and friends for a brief moment in time#signalis#this isn’t worded well but gets the tag regardless#I should make a rambles tag separate from my personal tag maybe#lynx rambles#<- new tag ig
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How do the researchers react to the clan cats leaving the lake for a time?
You mean the little patrols they send out?
They aren't aware of them, EXCEPT for the Beaver Expedition that Dovepaw was on. They found out about that one because they got a phone call from the team in charge of the beaver introduction.
It was NERVE WRACKING. Both teams were terrified the other would injure their subjects. They were horrified when the cats dug out the top of the dam and pulled the squealing baby beavers out, thinking this was going to end BADLY, but practically cried in relief and excitement when the Clan cats baited the parents towards the lake.
(I like to imagine someone on the beaver team ended up hitting it off with someone on the Clan cat team. The wedding cake was cats and beavers.)
But generally? They don't know about expeditions. Sometimes they catch them leaving, but don't have the funding to chase them down.
Clan cats are also not under constant surveillance. Very important to understand this. Clan cats will attack anything that upsets them and good cameras are expensive; they snuck one into the ThunderClan Camp once in like 2009, and Firestar dug it up at the stake and dropped it down the WindClan border ravine because it was freaking his warriors out.
(The cats don't understand that the cameras watch; they just don't like the Freaky Human Thing)
So the team has to be careful, not install too many, and hide the ones they do have. They don't want the cats to move again.
#I try to make sure that my researchers are more like actual wildlife scientists than gods. Yknow?#I think it's more interesting that they have funding issues and can't just install endless cameras#PLUS the cats reach the lake around 2008-ish. So I try to keep the technology accurate#Re: a lot of this is based off techniques they had to use for capturing the footage on Meerkat Manor#I also use the wayback machine to reference the Sirtrack catalogue which was cutting edge tech at the time#And mind you! This isn't meerkat manor. These researchers are ridiculously underfunded#Have i ever mentioned that i loved meerkat manor as a kid? A family member used to record it for me lmaooo#Better bones au#Millie's radio collar
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maybe the real Viktor arcane season 2 character arc were the friends we made along the way
#I’m sorry but they relied way too heavily on off screen implications of things happening and telling instead of showing for his arc#we literally barely saw anything of what he had to go through to get to any of the places where he was in the season#idk maybe I need to rewatch to understand better but due to the rushed pacing and severe lack of screen time I feel he didn’t get enough#nuance and substantial characterisation that he truly deserved this season#like dude barely got to machine his herald before the writers decided it was time to wrap up and have a 2 min redemption arc😭#let that man be full of RAGE let him be FERAL let him have an UGLY GROTESQUE MAN MADE MACHINE TRANSFORMATION#GOD FORBID A MAN COMPREHENDS THE HORRORS HE’S WITNESSED!!#I love season 1 but season 2#Rn it’s a 6.5/10 for me while s1 was a 9 or 10/10#maybe I need to rewatch to see if any of the other characters got it better than he did I mean I LOVED ekko jayce and jinx this season#but Viktor Mel and sky#they got fumbled so hard they deserved so much better imo sorry#yapping#arcane#arcane spoilers#arcane critical#Might delete later idk this rant feels deeply unserious and I’m also sleep deprived so maybe my takes aren’t the best#Living up to my name as the world’s first elderly teenage girl bc I need a grandpa level nap GOD#my post
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More frenrey doodles (i need to hit him with rocks)(in a positive way)(you get it)
#hlvrai#half live vr but the ai is self aware#hlvrai benry#hlvrai benrey#oh my god#these bitches gay#good for them#frenrey#hlvrai gordon#doodle#i choose to believe that benrey has nightmares almost every night and half of the time its because the gnomes are there#the inner machinations of my mind are an enigma#kiss so good i had to give him the scene kid eyes#me when i sneak a heathers reference into my drawing bc i think its funny 😇
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Hi y'all, I just wanted to talk a little about the behind the scenes of what I've been up to, to give y'all a little transparency and to open myself up for any tips or input! 🙏 Thank you for your continued support and for taking the time to look at my art 🫶
First and foremost I wanted to give some transparency about my art capacity.
As og followers may remember, I started this blog when I was doing art full time. Eventually my living expenses grew and I had to go back to work. I find myself in a cycle of "I'll make more art soon, once I get a job!" And "I'll make more art soon, once I am done with this job!" I lost my most recent job suddenly, having had an extension waved over my head until the last day(October 7th). Now I'm excited to have more time for art, but I am also feeling a rush to get a new job ASAP as I've been living paycheck to paycheck. I dream of doing this work full time, I'm just scared it's not quite there yet and I worry that I come off as scammy or dishonest when I anticipate more stability around the corner.
Second, I've been struggling with the Patreon. It's taken me a while to come to terms with this, but from what I've seen Patreon is not intuitive at all from the creator end. It doesn't do a good job of organizing addresses, emails, showing who or who isn't subscribed to me, or organizing and displaying the work I put on there. I've been really shocked by this experience, since lots of big names use Patreon. It's been a great way to streamline support, but it's been unhelpful in every other regard. I would like to continue using it, but I will most likely post more wips or process videos there in the future.
Which brings me to my third point, zines. I love making zines so much, it feels personal and fulfilling and fun! However the Patreon issues make it harder to keep information in order about where to send zines, or even where to message folks about them. In addition to this, the post office has been a big barrier to me, oftentimes only being open at the same time as my dayjob. Making zines can take days, then sending them out is a whole other monster.
This work is so important to me. Drawing peoples fantasies, representing body types, creating work around sexuality and the human experience feels like what I'm meant to do. I've made comics since I was a kid. This is the dream to me. The friends I've been able to make through this work are so important to me, and the conversations have been invaluable. Not to mention fun! I wanna doodle, I wanna draw hot stuff, I wanna thirst over these dudes! I want to play!
But I also just want to be transparent about the barriers I'm working around to share that experience. I'm completely self taught, both in art AND in running shops, building websites, running 8 accounts, etc. I take a lot of time to learn the logistics of these things, and try to make them make sense for my relationship with y'all (I do not want to paywall my art!! I don't want to!!!). This year my desktop broke down (the main one I use for all paintings and digital art). I've paused my Etsy shops and my Patreon to try to catch up with things. Trying to learn to paint in a completely different program. Then lost my job with no savings.
At the end of the day I don't want anything to come between me sharing my art with you. I wish I could doodle a thing, take a picture, and post it here. No third party site, no shop, no subscription. Just sharing my art with you. I promise I'm trying to figure out how to stay as close to that as possible, and I want to thank y'all for sticking with me as I untangle all of that.
So, what can you expect in the near future?
I'm working on a couple of painting commissions right now, which you should be able to see in the next couple of days! I want to catch up on kinktober and get those posted as well. There's a comic commission in progress which I'm very eager to work on, and which I think y'all will be excited for! To ease the weight of the Patreon I think I may do less zines/polls there and more wips and process videos! If possible, I want to do more full colored work too.
Thank you again for enjoying my work, and if you have any input or tips my inbox is always open 🙏🫶💕
#long post#info#marco lore#i wish i had time to edit this and make it nice#i just wanted to be open with yall about how much work this takes and that im trying to make it more doable#i don't want to overpromise stuff with patreon or shops and if im late sending stuff i never ever want it to come off as intentional or mali#malicious or as a scam#im just trying very hard to like ...survive. financially. and then trying to make all the logistics of thos big machine work. and then keep#up with commissions and shops and printing and mailing#god i wish i had employees but jts just me#i hand draw everything and then post it here to the word press to the ig and crop and caption and tag#then to the Patreon if it makes sense to or to the tiktok back in the day#and the formatting is all different#and i get messages across all of these platforms and I'm trying to learn a new way of painting on the fly#on top of that im supposed to be running my two Etsy shops too which im not right now because..broadly gestures#my nervous system can only take losing a job so often. the rug was really pulled feom under me in this one. i thought id have more time#i don't want to sound like I'm whining and i don't want to give up on all of this#i want to be very very very clear that art is what i love and who i am and what i want to do#i want to be posting on the daily again#i just need to evaluate what that looks like everytime life changes#I'm seriously so grateful for those of y'all that have joined the Patreon or bought stuff from the shop i really don't mean to drop the ball#so many times#y'all have literally been the difference between me making rent or not and I'm so worried that i don't make enough art to give back to that#relationship#im trying my best#okay anyways im posting this
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I’ve been going through and reading sermons from Spurgeon. I found a website that has hundreds of them and I just stuck them all in a Google doc and highlighted the titles I felt interested me.
But I finally read his wiki biography tonight.
Was anyone going to tell me that I was reading the sermons of a 20-21 year old or was I supposed to figure that out myself 😂
#Y’all he started preaching at like age 16#I love this man#he frequently says stuff in his writings that I imagine God had him say just so I’d read them 150+ years later#(I know that’s probably not true but the dude speaks to my soul and I’ll often be reading a sermon and it takes a turn and starts#Addressing EXACTLY what I’m going through that week)#And like#his devotionals#God has spoken to me so many times through those down to nearly exact wording of questions and anxieties I have#Like?????#I wish he could have known that in 1856 he wasn’t just preaching to his church#He was preaching to a scared and anxious girl in her 20s 168 years later#If I got a time machine my first trip would be to see Jesus but the second? Spurgeon. Easy.#I need him to actually privately mentor me#Anyways#read Spurgeon y’all#Charles Spurgeon
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the annoying thing about having a sewing machine but it’s buried in the basement is i have a sewing machine but it’s buried in the basement. you can’t use something that’s buried in the basement
#thinking about how if asos doesn’t carry my favorite brand of jeans anymore & i can’t buy them directly from the brand (don’t ship to us)#then i need to really repair the ones i already have. if only i had a sewing machine#also if only i had the studio space at work that my boss promised me a year and a half ago. lol. you know what i would put in there?#sewing machine.#anyway i guess i could ask my roommate if i could use her machine#or god forbid PAY to go to studio time at the fabric store.#chatpost
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A Date in Exchange
(Part 1) (Part 2) (Part 3) (Part 4) (Part 5) (Part 6) (Part 7)
It’s been several days of not seeing the villain—they’re not even in the streets anymore. It’s getting close to the point in the week where they show up on the hero’s doorstep with that stupid flurry of flowers and that even stupider scowl that keeps getting darker with each week, but their silence is making the hero think they might skip out on their little date night for the first time.
They know their parents would worry if they suddenly went radio silent on their supposed partner. That’s what this feeling is. They’re not concerned for the villain. They just have a lot riding on them showing up. That’s all.
Their concern for the villain’s absence manifests into a short text message, one of many sent over the past few days.
I was hoping we could talk about things. It’s our usual night - I’ll get some wine and we can keep it casual?
The sound of their phone pinging 15 minutes later almost stops their heart, and they practically vault over their table to snatch their phone up.
I wanted to talk anyway. I’ll be there at my usual time
It’s the most grammatically correct message the villain’s ever sent, and it makes the hero’s insides twist nervously. They've never used capitalisation in their life. Or punctuation. They want to talk.
That’s not what matters though, the hero tells themself. They’re coming. I can fix things.
Things could be shit with the villain for all they care. This is only because of their parents. Nothing else.
The hero doesn’t set up some random activity like they usually do. They don’t want their nemesis to think that they’re trying to pretend everything is fine. They set an empty vase on the table, throw a lasagne in the oven just in case, and simply opt to wait.
The sound of their own doorbell ringing is as relieving as it is nauseating. The villain is on their doorstep, of course, and they don’t even try to offer the hero a smile. They somehow get more bothered when the door opens, if anything.
“Hey,” the hero opens softly. They step back to let the villain in, but they stay rooted to their spot outside.
“I’m not staying long,” the villain tells them flatly, and the hero can feel that twist again. “I’m just here to say something.”
“Surely you can say it out of the cold.”
The villain heaves a deep breath, their sigh puffing in a cloud in front of their face. “I’m calling it off.”
The hero can’t define what feeling is gnawing at them at the news. Betrayal? Annoyance? Heartbreak? “Is… is this because of my parents?”
The villain shrugs half-heartedly. “I think what your mother said put some stuff into perspective about what we’re doing. I can’t marry you because she said so, jesus.”
“You can ignore her,” the hero says instantly. “She doesn’t understand.”
“Exactly. How long are you expecting me to lie about this, [Hero]?” The villain’s expression turns pissed. “Do we have a beautiful wedding, have kids, die together? Where’s the line?”
They’ve clearly been thinking about this a lot. No wonder they disappeared for so long. “She can’t make us get married, [Villain]. That doesn’t have to happen.”
“Good, because there’s no way in hell I would marry you like this.”
Something in that hurts, and the hero can’t quite tell why. “Can you just come in? I put a lasagne on and I don’t want to waste it.”
They’re not sure why they’re so set on saving this, but the villain looks past them and into the comfortable warmth, and the slightly defeated nod they give the hero makes their heart sing with hope.
The villain makes an attempt to settle into the sofa as the hero goes about taking the lasagne out of the oven. It’s a little burnt—they timed it a bit too well with the villain’s arrival. The edges are crisp but it’s still edible, and they carefully dollop it onto a pair of plates.
“I get that you don’t want to marry me, and I’m not asking you to.” The hero slides a plate in front of the villain, who doesn’t seem to have much of an appetite. “Don’t let my mother put you off.”
“Why are you so set on me doing this?” The question would be cold if it wasn’t for the slight knit in the villain’s eyebrows. “Why couldn’t you have asked anyone else?”
They wish they knew—they’re sure their parents would like any other so-called partner they could bring home. It would feel wrong doing it with anyone else, though. It’s easier to shrug it off when it’s with someone you hate, right?
They let their gaze rest on the villain, though, their eyes searching the hero’s for a semblance of an answer, their lips pulled into a slightly concerned frown, and for god’s sake they’re still stunning. It’s unfair. Things are starting to make sense alarmingly fast, sitting there staring at their fake lover, and they decide that they need to stop thinking right now.
“I don’t know.” They get to their feet so they can find an excuse to look elsewhere, beelining for the alcohol cupboard. “Look, it’s my father’s birthday this weekend, and I don’t want to ruin it with bad news. Can you hold off until then?”
“Please don’t make me actually pretend to be in a relationship with you in front of other people again.”
The hero grimaces, and the villain goes through the five stages of grief based on their expression alone. “He invited you.”
“I hate you and your parents,” the villain tells them with a scowl.
“So you’ll come?” the hero asks hopefully. A wine bottle pops open in their hand, and the villain doesn’t complain.
They scowl again, and it’s infuriating that they look so good doing it. “Last time ever. After that we stop lying and it’s over.”
The idea of this being a cold memory in less than a week hurts more than it should. The hero misses five minutes ago when they couldn’t figure out why. “Promise.”
(Final part!)
#writing#creative writing#writing community#writers on tumblr#writblr#heroes and villains#hero x villain#a date in exchange#hello friends it is time to Overshare on the Internet#guess who had an mri the other day!!!!!#BEFORE WE FREAK OUT IM FINE#it is a monitoring situation i am yet to keel over#god has me in a chokehold and he still cant take me out#also note to the radiologists: plz. choose a better radio station half my pain in the machine was the terrible music
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like yeah it’s so much fucking money to buy a coffee & a sweet treat but it’s about the ritual. it’s the ritual. it’s going outside of your house, meeting the familiar barista, chatting idly & waiting for a hot beverage you can carry around - you just don’t get that at home
#like yeah god it would save us so much money if we had a working coffee machine again in the house#but#the rituaaaalll#the routiiineee#like no one understands how excited i am for christmas day because my local coffee shop might be doing free coffees again#that was so fucking nice last year#it really brought the community together - i chatted with so many people On Christmas & saw so many dogs#i wasn’t just cooped up at home - i loved it !!!!!#even if it’s not Free this time - it was just really cool#hope it happens again :)
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If I had a time machine I would go back to 2010 and tell myself to start playing FFXIV sooner.
#She would be like#Who the fuck are you#I'm literally twelve#And I'd be like no shut up listen#You have to be there#You have to start from the beginning.#I promise. It's worth it.#And then I'd disappear and leave her with nothing but questions.#And she'd be pissed off because she didn't even have internet access at that age#so how could she play an MMORPG#Just realized if I had a time machine I could just go back to 2010 and play FFXIV in 2010 myself#And then live the next 14 years while maintaining my sub#14 years of FFXIV? Yaaaay#Going through these past 14 years again? Oh god
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I don't know why every single customer I've been in correspondence with the last two weeks have been the biggest dickheads on the fucking planet but I'm [very professionally] calling one out on lying to me right now which feels very VERY good. 🩷
#i deal with very wealthy high-touch shitheads all the time but my GOD idk why the most heinous have crawled out of the woodwork lately#this guy was roundabout accusing us of breaking his machine#claiming 'it's ironic bc i never had this problem until i had it tuned up'#so me - the bitch who literally does admin for the company and has access to literally all records - was like :)#let's see about that :)#and he literally complained of the same exact issue back in april lmao#so no dude we didn't break ur machine. it's probably user error at this point.#so now i get to hit him with a 'i see in your service records that you had submitted the following:'#chomp a dick dude i'm TIRED
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So...while checking my phone yesterday at work on my own time ::cough:: I saw a video on my timeline that looked like a bit of One Vision behind the scenes, and it showed Roger's drums, the guitars, etc., and at the verrrrrrrrrrrry end, about a second and a half of Brian in the distance at a keyboard (pretty sure he was wearing The Shorts (TM)).
I had it on mute, but people in the comments mentioned how beautiful the song was and said something about butterflies, or the/a butterfly...
When I got home I scrolled back a day and a half in my timeline, went through the tags, and in true tumblr fashion, I cannot find this post. I'm now wondering if it was just a lovely a fever dream.
Help?
Edited to add: Huzzah! Thank you to @themonkeespaw for pointing me in the right direction! I've now reblogged so I can have it forever. <3<3<3
#Brian May#my guitar god love#I'm used to tumblr's shenanigans with disappearing posts but COME ON#Queen#if I had a time machine I'd go back to yesterday morning .. alas I have no such device#(I feel like such a doofus but I have a mighty need)#tumblr .. how the heck did this not pop up in my wayback if someone I follow reblogged this yesterday???#I saw a ton of other things I recognized but not this. SO weird.
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