#if i had a nickel for every time i was looking forward to a game developed by someone who represents themselves online with a white dog

[junkalopes]

frog ball is love. frog ball is life. go wishlist SLARPG on steam and itch.

[msviolacea]

In today's Dragon Age brainrot, I am avoiding work by thinking about how the potential lesson to learn from the Veilguard gameplay is not "Solas was right all along and our Rook fucked everything up" but "Solas was probably right to try to fix things Back in the Day, but no solution is without consequences, and once the world has adjusted itself around those consequences trying to unmake everything is the wrong choice, especially if you decide that the people who exist in the new world are somehow lesser beings than the ones you knew."

(Aside: if I had a nickel for every time a ridiculously powerful immortal character named Sola(u)s tried to fix a world-ending calamity with an effective but ultimately terrible solution and then eons later wanted to destroy the new version of the world to try to bring back the one he previously loved, I'd have two nickels, which isn't a lot but it's weird that it happened twice, etc.)

And the lesson to learn as PCs is not "we should never have tried to stop Solas we fucked up the world!" but "it's never wrong to try to save the world, but sometimes your solution is going to create even more problems, and you'll need to live with the consequences."

Looking forward to a(nother) game that hopefully has a moral of "creating a better world means working with what exists, with the people you have, and putting your trust in the people you love to help you shape the future."

[bipanicoverthegravessiblings]

Can we have Andrew and Reader transforming into half demon?

You can do it with Ashley together with Reader (separately) if you want.

Reader would have been with the Graves family since episode 1, as she was an exchange student but ended up being abandoned along with her Graves siblings.

She would be a cold, relaxed, indifferent person, a little sociopathic, a little temperamental but kind when they meet.

Reader would have been injured in the Hitman confrontation when she went to save Andrew (let's be honest, this kid would never be able to shoot the Hitman the first time with him being all nervous).

So to treat her injuries correctly they decided to use the demon to heal her, the demon doesn't like the idea of healing someone but he decides to heal her but still angry with this 'disrespect' the demon turns her into a half demon (similar to Jennifer Body the film).

That if she wants to stay alive she has to eat human flesh or drink blood.

If I had a nickel for every time I was requested to write a reader who’s an exchange student staying with the Graves Family- I’d have 4 nickels. Which isn’t a lot, but it’s weird that it’s happened 4 times already

Andrew Graves x Half Demon!Reader

Andrew’s head was pounding

His eyes were wide with terror as he stared down at you in his arms

The events kept playing in his head, over and over like a broken record

He had found the hitman in Ashley’s spontaneously stupid game of hide-and-seek

Although, what was she expecting?

It was an amateur with a gun against a skilled killer with a knife

Of course he wasn’t going to do well!

So, you did the only thing you could think of to save him

Save the boy who you’ve lived alongside since high school

Who’s been nothing but kind and patient to you..

Push him away as the hitman lunged

So, here you lay..

Barely breathing in his arms

While the hitman laid dead nearby

Andrew, in a blind rage finally fired the gun. Draining it dry of any bullets in there in hopes of killing him

And, he achieved his goal

The hitman was dead

And it didn’t look like long til you’d be you…

“Well- you’ve successfully wasted all of our ammo.” Ashley grumbled, picking up her discarded gun. She wiped off any grass blades or dirt that stuck to the pristine silver of it.

If Andrew wasn’t still in shock, he would yell at her. Yell at her for having the audacity to worry more about her gun’s ammo than their dead friend! Yell at her for foolishly trusting him to kill the hitman and then running off! If you hadn’t jumped in, he would be dead…

He should be dead.

Andrew furrowed his brow, tears forming much to his dismay. As he shut his eyes, they fell in twin streams. His hands shook, gripping on to your body as it slowly lost its warmth. He quietly sobbed, trying his best to not make them too loud or pathetic. If he had been better with the gun…if he didn’t hesitate…you would still be…

“Andy!” He felt something cold tap the back of his head, breaking him from his mellow dramatic moment. Ashley stared down at him with frustration, “Come on! Let’s ditch the bodies, someone was bound to hear your bitch crying by now..”

“Are you serious?!” Andrew stood up, still holding you in his arms. He thrusted his arms forward, pushing Ashley back with your dead weight, “Look at her! She’s dying!” He was emotional. Erratic. But he didn’t care.

“I can see that!” His sister pushed his arms back, and Andrew held you close to his chest, “Now put her down before anyone comes by!”

“…no.”

He wasn’t yelling anymore, just staring down at you. Ashley’s eyes widened, before her face became a scowl.

“No?”

“No!”

Ashley, pinched the bridge of her nose, “Okay- yeah- ssuuurreeee! Let’s just carry a dead body around! Want me to stick my hand up her ass and sit her on my lap like a puppet so you can pretend you’re talking with her?” She roughly poked Andrew’s forehead, “Are you out of your fucking mind?!”

“Well I’m not leaving her!” Andrew snapped back, making Ashley flinch ever so slightly. He didn’t seem to care though as he turned his attention back down to you.

Both were quiet for a while, probably longer than they should have because people would be coming by soon to see the commotion. Ashley could see the thoughts running behind her brother’s eyes, clearly thinking of something to fix this…to fix you.

She didn’t understand what the fuss was about though. You were just dead weight before, and now you are literally. Plus, she never liked the looks her brother gave you. You were better off dead in her eyes, and if anyone was going to kick the bucket, it would’ve been you…

But Andrew didn’t want to leave you behind. Sentimental bastard. What was he expecting? You to just- snap out of being dead? It wasn’t that easy!

….or….was it?

Ashley’s hand drifted over the front pocket of her shorts, the imprint of the demon trinket visible. Andrew saw her subconscious motions out of the corner of his eye and perked up. Where hope formed on his face, Ashley scowled.

“No!”

“Give it here!”

Andrew set your body down, lunging for his sister for the trinket. The pair fell to the ground, wrestling one another for the trinket.

“Let! Go!”

“No! It’s mine!”

In the end, Ashley didn’t win. Andrew, for as gangly as he is, was still stronger than her and managed to get the trinket away. He cupped it in his hands, standing up and observing it quizzically. There was an ominous aura to this dream catch esc thing, but he didn’t care.

“The demon..”

“Andrew, no!”

“Let’s take Y/N to the cultists lair—“

“Andrew!”

“Summon the demon—“

“You asshole- are you even listening?!”

“And get her back!”

Andrew grinned from ear to ear, his arms held out at the genius of his plan.

So- this is what it felt like to be Andrew, Ashley lamented. She got why he was such a stick in the mud all the time now.

Before she could object, Andrew was already picking up your body.

“Come on! Let’s go! Everyone should be gone by now!”

Despite Ashley’s insistence that it wouldn’t work and they should cut their losses, Andrew persisted

Eventually the two snuck you into the cultists’ meeting room

Shockingly, everything was still set up from when Andrew had previously visited.

It made for a quick and easy ritual

Ashley’s demon friend was less than happy to be bothered though….

“tAr SoUl….wHaT iS tHiS?”

The dark, red eyed blob stared angrily up at Ashley- who gestured to your dead corpse like a game show assistant would show off a car.

“A body?…”

“I rEqUiRe FrEsH sOuLs..” the demon skittered around the body, prodding it with its tendrils, “tHiS iS aLrEaDy DeAd!”

“I know but-“ Ashley groaned, pointing to Andrew with her thumb, “My dumbass brother draws the line at necrophilia and wants her back.”

“I’m sorry- WHAT?!”

Andrew objected, completely disregarding the fact that they were in the presence of a demon, “Do you REALLY think the only reason I want to bring her back is so I can have sex with her?!”

“Well?” Ashley looked at him blankly, “Isn’t it?”

“…..” Andrew adverted his eyes to the ground, “It’s…partly true…”

“I fucking knew it.” Ashley sighed, completely exasperated by her brother’s idiocy, “I can’t believe you’re using MY demon connections so you can get your dick wet without feeling like a bad person! News flash Annnddyyyyy~” she gave him that shit eating grin she knew he despised, “You’ve done much worse.”

“Shut your whore mouth!”

“Make me pussy!”

“EnOuGh!”

The siblings stopped their bickering, Andrew pausing as he had grabbed the collar of Ashley’s shirt. They stared at the demon, looking more like their parent just scolded them than a demon yelling at them to stop their bickering.

The demon floated very close to Andrew’s face, causing him to release his sister and step back, “yOu WiSh To UsE mY pOwErS tO rEvIvE tHe MoRtAl?”

Andrew nodded.

“tHeN wHaT iS iT yOu OfFeR?..”

Andrew’s face contorted as he tried to think, “Uhhhh…”

Ashley stood behind the demon, smugly smiling at her cornered brother, “Haha! Bet ya didn’t think this far, didya?”

“Shut up woman!—“

Andrew immediately regretted raising his voice, as the demon’s red eyes glowed menacingly- almost staring holes into his retinas. He gulped, wishing he could tell Ashley to call off her guard demon- but that would only make things worse for him. Here he was, with no souls to offer a demon- and the demon already didn’t like him for his foolish request and yelling at his ‘tar soul’.

“wElL?…” the demon broke the silence that wafted through the air.

Andrew’s eyes widened, “O-Okay! Ummm..” he searched his brain for anything, any idea on how to revive you when he blurted out the first thing he landed on, “Souls! I can get you two souls for bringing back Y/N’s!”

“aNd WhErE aRe ThEsE sOuLs?”

“Well, I don’t have them now-“ The demon growled and Andrew tensed, “But! But! I can get them to you very soon! Yeah! How’s that sound?”

The red eyed blob stared at Andrew for a few moments, clearly considering his deal before it turned around and made its way to your corpse, “VeRy WeLl…BuT yOuR fAiLuRe FoR pAyMeNt UpFrOnT wIlL cOmE wItH cOnSeQuEnCeS..”

With those words, the room went pitch black. By the time the fluorescent lights returned, the demon was gone. Andrew lunged for your body, kneeling down beside you.

“Y/N?…” he shook you a little, “Y/N?”

His face faltered for a moment, fear coursing through him before he felt your body move. Your breathing was slow…but you were breathing! He cupped your face in his hands, waiting anxiously for you to open your eyes.

And you did.

And then you spoke.

“..A-….Andrew?”

And like that- you were back!

Sore, with some blood gone

But back nonetheless!

You felt….strange though

Upon coming down from his high of overwhelming joy, Andrew noticed just how cold you were

You didn’t feel chilly at all

But you felt cold to the touch

Along with that, you couldn’t get the taste of blood out of your mouth

It was hard to decipher which was the result of having been a corpse for half an hour…

…or what was from being brought back by a demon

But, Andrew had a debt to pay

So that can be worked out later

Returning to the motel parking lot, the hitman’s car was still there

And no one was around yet

So you took that and set off

You slept most of the ride

It was a rough night of…ya know

Dying

So you deserved to sleep

Though your dreams were…strange

Images of red

Blood spewing as you bit into the neck of a screaming person

You didn’t get a good look at them until their body was a mangled mess of torn limbs with bits of flesh taken out of them

Your face stained with blood

The delicious sensation filling your mouth

At first you chalked this up to a guilt dream

You feeling bad for eating that cultist a while back

But…no

This wasn’t a guilt dream

You never feasted on that man like an animal

You never went back for seconds, depraved of the taste

And in those dreams you never felt what you were feeling in that moment

…desire for more

Your concerning dream was interrupted by a sudden sensation of pain as a projectile was thrown at your head.

“Ow!” You sat up, your hand shooting to the assaulted spot on your head, “What the?..”

“I told you to wake her!” Andrew hissed.

“I did!” Ashley objected, “My shoe woke her up!”

“You little..”

Andrew’s grumbling trailed off, turning to look at you from the driver’s seat. You gave him a reassuring nod to let him know you were okay. He sighed in slight relief. How that the- initial pain in your head was gone, you looked out the window to see just where you three were. The backseat passenger window showed you a parking with cars lining the spots as far as you could see.

“Where…are we?” You asked, turning back to look at the siblings, “And what are we doing here?”

“Cheapskate here says it’s free parking.” Ashley replied bluntly, not even giving Andrew’s annoyed look a glance.

You looked between them, “Don’t we- need to pay that demon back? How’s free parking going to get us two souls?”

“Go on Annnndddd—“ Ashley paused as Andrew gave her a look, “…drew. Andrew. Tell Y/N your brilliant plan!”

Andrew sighed, resting his hands on the wheel as he tried to explain the plan, “Alright, so…we need two souls for that demon. We- are also running low on money. So…we’re going to kill two birds with one stone.”

You nodded, though his and Ashley’s drastically different expressions told you there was more. So- you prodded.

“And those birds arreee?”

“…our parents.”

The rational thing was to claim that they couldn’t do such a thing! Their parents took you in after all!

…although you’d be lying

Mrs Graves really only agreed because she’d get a cut of the exchange student program funds

Other than provide you a roof, she ignored you like she did her other children

Same goes for her husband, who didn’t do much of anything beside give you awkward hellos before he went to work

So you weren’t really against robbing and killing them

The events played as normal, pretending the fire that “killed everyone” was sensational news coverage and you all were fine!

You’re “politely” told to go to bed early, bunking with Ashley in the basement while Andrew took the couch.

Though, being honest…

You didn’t trust yourself around Ashley alone

Ever since you’ve been alive you’d had this…animalistic urge to tear into someone like a carnivorous animal

To hold them to the ground and watch the light leave their fear filled eyes as you tore out their throat

And Ashley was defenseless

Sleeping just inches from you in the spare bed

Her gun was empty, you knew this

So she wouldn’t shoot you

So you did the both of you a favor, and got out of there

Your eyes lingered on the basement stairs, the bed and Ashley’s sleeping form still very in much in your view. You had to tear your eyes away to avoid running back down there and giving in to the voice in your head telling- no, demanding you devour her.

Your relationship with her was complicated enough, and you knew with enough convincing you would. She was always cold with you, trying to tear a wedge between you and Andrew as you both got closer. But she also was the closest thing you had to a sister or any actual familial connection. You don’t think you could bear that guilt.

You drew your eyes to the couch, Andrew fast asleep on it. You could trust yourself around him, you know you could. The voice had nothing against Andrew. So you crossed over to the couch, kneeling down beside it.

Andrew’s unconscious state was fragile, stirring almost immediately as he felt a presence join him. His eyes opened with some strain, his voice littered with tiredness.

“Y/N?…” he sat up, rubbing his eyes, “Did Ashley kick you out?..”

“No.” You responded. You debated telling him why you were here if Ashley hadn’t kicked you out, but what could you tell him? ‘Hey I wanted to eat your sister’? You couldn’t do that. So instead you asked, “Can I sleep with you tonight?”

A small blush painted Andrew’s cheeks, as he nodded slightly. He pulled the covers aside, scooting closer to the back of the couch so you’d have room. You climbed onto the couch with him, your arms wrapping around his torso. You felt him shiver from the closeness, almost forgetting how cold you were. You didn’t care though. You craved the closeness more than you craved tearing into Andrew’s flesh and eating his heart in front of him.

You furrowed your brow, pushing those thoughts down as Andrew slowly covered you two up.

“You…alright?” Andrew tentatively asked. Obviously you weren’t alright, by this time last night you were dead.

You racked your mind about what to say, nuzzling into his sweater for comfort as you spoke, “I’m- fine….just ever since I….”

“Died?”

“Yeah, that….I’ve had….urges.”

“Like- what?”

“…like devouring someone like an animal.”

He went quiet after that. You can’t exactly say what you expected reaction wise. Disgust? Fear? Silence felt appropriate to be fair. You weren’t anticipating his next words when he processed the information…

“…three birds with one stone then.”

The plan went as the siblings had- semi planned.

Scaring the parents with an unloaded gun into the basement

Removing the limit from Mrs Graves credit card so they’d have some cash

Handing their souls to the demon

And Andrew leaving you to enjoy your meal

You felt like an animal. A hungry, ravenous animal.

Your breath was shaky, eyes wide with horror at what you’d done. You and the basement were bloodied mess, and your host parents were mangled beyond recognition.

It didn’t help that you were on your hands and knees, chin drenched with blood as what you had done replayed in your mind. The sounds of the basement stairs creaking broke you out of your trance. You cowered momentarily before realizing it was Andrew.

“Wow- you..” he paused, covering his mouth as he gagged from the smell of blood, “Really did a number on them..”

Hot tears welled in your eyes as you stared up at him. You trembled, falling further to the ground than you already were. Your forehead met the basement floor as you sobbed.

“I’m sorry!” You wailed, “I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I’m sorry—“

It was all you could say. What else could you? You shook and sobbed like the wounded animal you were as Andrew slowly approached you. He fell to his knees in front of you, and pulled you into a hug. His parents’ blood stained his sweater, but he didn’t care. He’ll wash it later.

You trembled in his arms as he rubbed gentle circles into your back, soft shushes filling your ears as he comforted you. You buried your face into his shoulder, shaking and crying from what you’d done. This was different than when you ate the cultist back at the apartment, then you didn’t feel so….dehumanized.

He was prepared like a dish. Not bitten into like a wolf delivering the killing blow to a deer. He was eaten for survival. They were eaten to satiate this desire you had.

Though to Andrew, this downside was worth it, so long as he could hold you again.

[mostlymilkwood]

We're halfway through 2024! I know this has been a big Yuri year for you. What are some of your favorites you've read this year?

I will make every year a Big Yuri Year going forward!! but you're right, I've been making my way through my backlog and checking out new stuff as it hits but here are a few!

Monthly in the Garden with My Landlord We are forgiving Kitano Miyako for the crime of being a landlord because the series she's in is very sweet and gay and I like it a lot!! I'm not actually one who's into low conflict manga but there's just enough bite every now and then in Monthly, be it through Miyako's past in the idol industry or Asako's past breakups, that I think it strikes a great balance. I was also thinking the other day about how the main trope of this is kind of… There Was Only One Bed House lol. Anyway, it also nice to have the story keep going after the build up of the main couple getting together, I'm going to miss it so much once it finishes in the coming months :((( Fav panel:

Sukeban and Transfer Student Stella art that's made to mimics an 80s manga style to reinforce the time period it's set in? Sooo Good!! I love comics as an art form!! I love seeing them doing shit like this that only comics can do!!! I wish this was licensed so badly!! Anyway it's got a fun setup of two high school losers being losers in very different directions, which is always fun. I hope I get to read more of it soon! Fav panel:

False Marigold If I had a nickel for every yuri manga I'd read where the dual protagonist was a blind girl called Lily, I'd have two nickels! This has a lot of interesting elements at play, you've got the time period being the 1910s (ish??), you've got Lily's blindness, her love for Hana's brother and the fact that she doesn't know he's dead, and finally you've got Hana's failed attempt to kill Lily and her now pretending to be said dead older brother for Lily. So Like, It's A Lot!! A great mix of bitter sweet feelings from a lot of characters, I can't wait to see how it all plays out in the end. Fav panel:

How Do We Relationship? Ha ha haaaaaah. God. I'm late to the game on this series, it's already 12 volumes in and I kept seeing people who don't normally talk about manga, or yuri, or yuri manga say it's a really good and devastating read, so I was curious! THEY WERE CORRECT ON ALL FRONTS. Hat's off to the author for the total rug pull after volume 4 where you learn this is not a "story about what happens after you start dating someone" but is actually "a story about what happens after you breakup with someone"!!! God!!! But honestly, I can't say I've read anything quite like How Do We Relationship, it's rough sometimes but super compelling, it captures the college adolescent really well! I'm almost nostalgic for all the drama of my college days haha. Fav Panel That Is Driving Me Insane:

OKAY BUT LIKE, WHY DOES NO ONE TALK ABOUT THE FACT THAT YURIA IS JUST DRAWN AS AN ELF???? HER HAIR NORMALLY COVERS HER EARS SO YOU DON'T SEE THEM TILL THEIR FIRST TIME NAKED TOGETHER AND IM JUST MEANT TO NOT THINK ABOUT THE FACT THAT SHE'S AN ELF?? WITH POINTY EARS AND TEETH??? IT'S NEVER MENTIONED BY ANYONE!! THIS ISN'T A FANTASY SERIES WHY DOES SHE LOOK LIKE THAT???

Shoutouts: I Want to Make Black-Knight Fall In Love With Me! and The Helpless Saint and the Powerless Princess, they're recently started in Yuri Hime and I've been enjoying the first couple of chapters that are out so far, looking forward to seeing where they go this year!

[cielospeaks]

game stuff (compiled. and no its not positive lol)

-go:

bruh a real one step forward five million steps back moment fr. we had samurai remnant (fun and enjoyable crossover event. only downside is only now i find out robot mozart and yui have the same voice actor and i aquiesced to not rolling her bc she wouldnt come home and now i am full of regret. tho to be fair robot mozart happened long after the event lol), valentines (awesome new servant! andromeda is cute and i feel completely neutral but not negative on the take on her character! charon was cool too), and white day (usually i am so irritated at the cut ins but charly is so good natured and honest i cant be mad at him. he just feels like the good energetic boy coming in to check on you every morning. and cyrano is just so peak -pacha meme- the rest of the cast was wonderful too). but then. oh then. you had to just fucking do main story stuff. like yea sure some cringily fanservice power level edge thing with d antes and j alter is inevitable and whatever. but bring sal into it??????? only to not give him fucking anything????? and then permanently delete him, lobo, and any other half tolerable avenger (angra ig. or kuroe?) bc the edgey op fanservice characters need their wangst. ugh. the plot isnt even out but i imagine its something like- sal is typecast into himself and hates every second of it, moz bullies him bc its moz and the feeling is mutual, but evil marie takes advantage of it and him and the fandom reads it as cute. same w d antes or j alter and him. im so done w their reaction to the trio it makes me just disgusted. if the two of them treated him better id be more on board but they dont. just bc sal believes theyre on the same wavelength doesnt mean its some cute fluffy nonsense you can just slice of life. i think it cuts personal bc ive believed to be on the same wavelength of others and thats why im so fucked up today is bc of what happened there. and above all i dont want sal to have to go through that sort of suffering, esp on top of all his other suffering.

also if i had a nickel for every time a fictional somewhat m arie a ntoinette has ruined the life of my favorite dead composer character i would have two nickles which is weird that it happened twice.

speaking of which

-dv:

this is the positives girls. antonio traumerei!!!!!! love love love. oh my gosh. it looks beautiful and antonio is beautiful. traumerei is such a good fit for him, it reminds me of the schumann song which reminds me of jack and rikudou. good vibes infinite immaculate vibes.

ricky seems to not be dead. i am so hoping hes secretly a ghost. like imagine if hes in the like reconstructed research vessel and then at the end is like "lol im not exactly alive lol" like that poke mon episode. i would lose it. tho if hes like cursed or something it makes me think of that kingdom hearts scene which i also find really funny.

mystery maid: aztec treasure eh

ghost sail ricky: aye

but all memes aside i hope he exclusively talks to inference or violetta bc they are easily the characters i can stand the most of the confirmed cast. i will get so disappointed if its just rehashed main story plot, esp bc i really dont like their interactions there. and violeta is so cute in this pls let them interact.

[dizzyhslightlyvoided]

I was going to do an "if I had a nickel for every (fast-forward noises) two nickels" bit about the similarities between the Phantasy Star Online 2 Oracle Story's plot and that of Sonic the Hedgehog 2006, but then I thought more and more about the similarities, and reached the following conclusion: were it not for the fact that PSO2 and Sonic 2006 were made by entirely different writers, dev teams, directors, and producers, you could conceivably make a case that PSO2 could have been an attempt by Sega to redo the plot of Sonic 2006, but done properly this time.

Matoi = Elise; they have the exact same lack-of-personality except that Matoi is "moe" so that the (cisallohet male) players will Want To Protect Her, in contrast to how hated Elise was. Also Matoi eventually becomes a companion NPC who fights alongside you instead of just being a damsel in distress who gets kidnapped every other scene.

The Profound Darkness (of which Matoi is the unwitting host) = Solaris/Iblis (of which Elise is the unwitting host) as the final boss.

Persona the Masked = Silver the Hedgehog; they both travel back in time to kill one or more heroic characters (the PSO2 protag and/or Matoi and Sonic, respectively) in order to prevent the awakening of the final boss as a result of becoming close friends with the final boss's host, though this isn't remotely clear at first in Persona's case due to the writers making shit up as they went along for most of the first two Episodes.

Gemini (and, well, every Dark Falz, at least in theory) = Mephiles, in terms of wanting to awaken the final boss deliberately.

Luther = Mephiles, in terms of being a manipulative chessmaster type who's both directly and indirectly responsible for at least 75% of the plot, although Luther's actual motivation is entirely different.

Lots and lots of time travel, which mostly makes more sense in PSO2.

Like, they literally both have a sequence where Shadow/the PSO2 protag and Silver/Persona travel back in time ten years and witness the disaster which more-or-less directly resulted in Elise/Matoi becoming the host of Iblis/Profound Darkness, and in which Silver/Persona was at least partly responsible for the actual becoming-the-host part, except that Persona went back in time separately from the player character, and making Matoi the host happened accidentally while Persona was trying to kill her. (Oops!)

In PSO2, the protagonist is 1. a silent protagonist who's a blank slate for the player to project themself onto and 2. a human (or one of three artificial races derived from humans) instead of a candy-colored anthropomorphic animal, so there's no concerns that they won't have any proper chemistry with Matoi ("Elise ... just smile!").

Not to say PSO2 is perfect, of course (insofar as anything looks perfect next to Sonic 2006); like I said earlier, they were clearly just making shit up as they went along for the entirety of Episode 1 (itself another piece of evidence against this idea), and I don't actually think Matoi is a better character than Princess Elise, in principle or in practice.

And, again, the two games were made by entirely different dev teams, writers, directors, and producers. The only staff they actually appeared to have in common was Hideaki Kobayashi, who was just one of the composers.

But it's still strange that it's happened twice. Right?

[bored-mumma]

Tom Holland Fluff Alphabet

MASTERLIST

A = Attractive. What do they find attractive about the other?

Personality wise, Tom loves your ability to laugh in most situations. No matter how stressed he is, you easily bring a smile to his face.

Physically, he finds your looks breath taking. Your  a priceless work of art to him.

B = Baby. Do they want a family? Why/Why not?

Yes, Tom is almost obsessed with the idea of having a family with you. He’s doing it all right. Got a house with a few spare bedrooms, proposed, got married, and now is waiting for the day you finally show him the positive test. It’s the life he’s always dreamt of. 

C = Cuddle. How do they cuddle?

Wrapped around you. Usually his arms are held around your waist, head resting on your chest and his legs tangled with yours too. He wants to feel your warmth and to just relax after a hard day.

D = Dates. What are dates with them like?

Not usually traditional ones. Instead of fancy restaurants, you can’t beat a late night drive to the beach, sitting in the car with a take away and singing very loudly and very badly to some love songs. Having fun is the most important part of your date nights.

E = Everything. You are my ____ (e.g. my life, my world…)

You are my best friend.

F = Feelings. When did they know they were falling in love?

You couldn’t see the floor from the amount of the snacks laid on it , you and Tom both wearing your comfiest pyjamas and snuggled up beneath some duvets. There was a raging storm outside so instead of a nice meal out, Tom ordered so much stuff to eat and some movies. He rested his head on your lap, your finger nails gently dragging along his skin. He wasn’t watching the movie though. Instead his eyes kept drifting up to you, realising just how much he has fallen in love with you. 

G = Gentle. Are they gentle? If so, how?

Very. In every way. He’ll hold you gently, he’ll comfort you gently. Even if you argue, he’ll still talk in a calm voice. You’ve never even heard him raise his voice let alone yell properly - especially at you. He’s definitely your gentle giant.

H = Holding Hands. How do they like to hold hands?

I = Impression. First impression/s?

Tom thought you were hilarious. In you walked, a large smile on your face and making everyone happy. You loved to make others happy and Tom was no exception. He introduced himself and the two of you hit it off almost immediately. It didn’t take long for him to ask you out - in fact he did so just three days later.

J- Joker. Are they into pulling pranks?

you tend to pull pranks on other people as a pair. He’ll randomly text you throughout the day saying he’s bored and the two of you will discuss how to pull a couple pranks on his co-workers. 

K = Kiss. How do they kiss?

Pretty gently. He puts his forehead on yours, holding your hands. He slowly leans in and presses his lips against yours, moving in sync. Although, of course, there are other times when its more feral. He’ll pull you towards him, claiming your lips as his own as his hands tangle in your hair. 

L = Love. Who says ‘I love you’ first?

Tom does. He was so excited to say it, he was acting like an over-energetic puppy! He made you your favourite breakfast one morning, along with a bouquet of your favourite flowers. Taking it up to you, you sat in the bed together and before you even had a chance to say thank you, Tom blurted “A beautiful breakfast for the beautiful woman i love.”

M = Memory. What’s their favourite memory together?

When you went to meet his family. He is really close with them all, and when you came in and just instantly clicked with everyone, Tom couldn’t help but sit back with a smile on his face. When everyone sat for dinner, Tom barely got a word in edge ways since his family was just adoring you and wanted to keep the conversation going. 

N = Nickel. Do they spoil? Do they buy the person they love everything?

You. Get. Everything. And I mean everything. When looking at buying your first house together, you had to get one with an extra bedroom just to store all the stuff he got you. Usually some random stuff he sees in shops that reminds him of you but it also includes stunning accessories, clothes, vintage books, literally everything

P = Petnames. What petnames do they use?

“babe” or “love”.

Q = Quaint. What is their favourite non-modern thing?

Tom loves to sow! It takes his mind of his hectic life just for a little while. A wall in the spare bedroom is just covered in his designs. Ones he’s most proud of but doesn’t want them hanging in the lounge. It’s also great for you. Rip in your favourite top? No problem, Tom can fix it.

R = Rainy Day

Board games! All and any! Except for monopoly, as experience taught you, that game brings out both your extreme competitive side. 

S = Sad. How do they cheer themselves/others up?

Tom is very good at talking about his feelings with you. If he’s down, he knows your the best shoulder to cry on and vice versa. He’ll always be there for you too. You may not be able to give him advice or to really help him out but just to have someone to hold, to cry to and talk to makes him feel safe. 

T = Talking. What do they like to talk about?

He loves a good gossip. Want to tell him a story about your co-workers having an affair? He’s all ears, throwing in a few gasps and questions too. He’s just nosy but so are you! So a perfect match. 

U = Unencumbered. What helps them relax?

A warm, deep bubble bath with some music playing softly, a good book and some snacks. It’s so relaxing there’s been a few times you’ve had to walk in the bathroom and wake him up from a nap.

V = Vaunt. What do they like to show off? 

He dances. All. The. Time. Either with you or just around you, he loves to dance. And you can’t deny, he’s got the moves! 

W = Wedding. When, how, where do they propose?

Coming home from a lunch date with some friends, you were looking forward to just relaxing at home since it was Toms night to cook. However, when you opened the front door, your eyes landed on the most beautiful sight. Your home was covered in flowers, some candles and a red carpet rolled down the middle. Except there was no sight of your partner. Calling out to him, you walked farther into the room when Tessa, your guys dog, ran out and down the red carpet, a little note wrapped around her collar. As you gave her a quick scratch behind the ears, you read the words “Will you marry me?” 

“What do you say?” You spin as you hear Tom speak from behind you, down on one knee and holding a stunning ring. 

X = Xylophone. What’s their song?

Lady in red

Y = You. You are the ___ to my ___ (e.g. the cookies to my milk, the macaroni to my cheese)

You are the straw to my berry

Z = Zebra. If they wanted a pet, what would they get?

Tom is very content with Tessa. Both of you love the staffy to pieces! But he’s very open at the idea of more dogs in the future. 

[thesmokingguns]

What are these?

Word count:912

FT: Kelly Nickels (present day) X You

Summary: Cassette tapes feel like a relic of the past but your packrat boyfriend keeps all the relics he has collected. Almost 60 years of stuff in a garage, half of it you don’t think has a purpose. Trying to find something you find all his tapes and a battle of the ages starts.

A/N: This feels like a crackfic but I was talking to my parents a few weeks ago about things that I just couldn comprehend. Like how an operator would know when and how much money you needed to add into a payphone or making a phone call and not using an area code or how I understood what a cassette was but I don’t think I ever used one. Then the wonderful @littlemisscare-all. Was talking about about a fic with present day Kelly and I wrote this. I hope you like it 

Tag List: @thenobodies-inc , @littlemisscare-all , @that-80s-chick @agroupiewhore , @ayablackwood

The garage was like a very dangerous game of Tetris thanks to your boyfriend being the biggest pack rat in the world. A yelp escaped your lips as you slipped, a box tumbling down along with you, spilling out in the driveway. If Kelly hadn’t saved every scrap of paper from the 80s on maybe you guys would have found the old photo albums that you had been looking for where he could prove to you that he had done the stuff he said.

“What are these?” you looked around at the spilled content of the box. PIcking up the clear item with ribbon wrapped inside. You stacked them back into the cardboard box moving to carry it into the house.

Kelly was digging through the closet, wondering why you had so many dresses when you seemed to only wear yoga pants and a bad attitude most days. As he was cursing your existence you walked in dropping the box onto the bed.

“Do you have a video camera? I want to watch these old tapes.” his eyes tore from the closet to where you were digging through the box. There was no way he was going to let you watch any tapes that you found laying around. Though he probably did look good in them.

He froze when he saw you holding up the object that you were wanting to watch on a video camera, his eyebrows furrowing together.

“That is a tape cassette. You know, to listen to music on.`` The blank look on your face made him realize you had no idea what it was. “You’re kidding me right? This is one of your bad jokes where you just try to make me feel old. Even though you’re turning thirty this year.” the way you grimaced at the reminder of your age made him smile.

“Bold calling me old when you’ll be 60 at the start of the new year.” his smile faltered, narrowing his eyes at you, “So this has music on it? Does it sound different like a record does or is like a CD?” you asked, flipping over the cassette.  

Kelly shook his head, digging into the box and pulling out a square metal box with foam headphones. You tried to remember the last time you used headphones with the band over your head or even with wires. He opened the back, tsking when he saw the spot didn’t have batteries. He grabbed your hand and pulled you out of the room and into the kitchen where he was digging through the junk drawer putting batteries into the back. He put the cassette tape into the device moving to put it over your ears.

He held up the walkman hitting the play button. You chuckled as music played through the shitty headphones, your hands going to hold them over your ears. It didn’t have the crackle of a record or lightweight easy portability of a CD.

“Skip this song.” you yelled out. The music fast forwarded and you were halfway through the next song, “The tape is messed up. It skipped the first half of the song.” The tape slid back to the ending of the first song, “Are you messing with me on purpose? Do you just need to find the groove of something?” Kelly gave you a look of frustration.

“You have to just fast forward and rewind until you find the song,” he explained. You pulled the headphones off, shaking your head as you handed him the headphones back. Kelly gave you a look, “Say it. Say your mean comment. If you hold it in, it gets twice as mean.” biting your lip you took in a breath, turning to him.

“Kelly, those are the most useless things and you’ve been carrying them around for my entire life, maybe longer. Why wouldn't you just listen to a record or buy a CD or you know, just have a music account like everyone else in this century!” you asked, throwing your hands up in the air.

“You’re the one who digs around in the garage and wants to play with all the things. Also want to point out that you collect records and you used to call the Vinyls with an S!” the way your cheeks turned pink in embarrassment at the memory let him know that he was winning this round.

“You want to play dirty, Kels? How about you getting an Instagram? Hashtag Am I doing this right? Heart emoji, beer emoji, pirate flag emoji, how about just adding another seven emojis to make it an even ten? That's what all the kids are doing.” The smirk he was giving you as he set the walkman down, going over to you and wrapping you in his arms.

“Oof, heart broken emoji, grandpa emoji, white flag emoji...I have seven more to use right?” he teased, laying a kiss on the side of your lips. You were melting in his arms.

“How about kissy face emoji? Red Lips emoji, bed, eggplant, peach, two water emoji?” his eyebrows raised as you headed back to the bedroom, stopping when you saw the box of cassettes there, “But first, these are going in the trash.” His mouth fell open, and he grabbed the box from you.

“I’ll put them away, ma chere. No need to throw away things.” You rolled your eyes watching him walk back into the garage. He was your packrat and you loved him,

[ariparri]

Fluff Alphabet - Glitter Bomb

At long last, here's the fluff alphabet for Carson and Tulip!

I wanted to get this done first before finishing up the stuff for Isa and the other au ships.

I'm still practicing with moodboards since I'm not good at making them. This is the second one I made for Glitter Bomb because I wasn't happy with the first one.

Related

DieRuca Fluff Alphabet

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

A = Attractive (What do they find attractive about the other?)

Carson finds Tulip eccentricity. He just loves how she isn't afraid to be herself. He loves a person with confidence, high self esteem and prides their own intelligence. He just finds that extremely attractive. Anybody can have a pretty face, but if the personality is terrible then everything else gets ruled out.

Tulip finds Carson, himself as a whole, attractive. She loves his style, the way he dresses like he's part of some band that plays in their garage and how he doesn't care if his style doesn't match. But what she finds most attractive is his humor and his laugh. Carson has a contagious laughter, and she's always finding herself laugh along with him even when she's trying to be serious. She just loves it, his sense of humor is great and his laugh always seems to brighten up everyone's mood.

B = Baby (Do they want a family? Why/Why not?)

Carson didn't really think about actually having kids. He did say that if he ever got a daughter, he would name her after his mother. Tulip at the time didn't see herself being a mother. She always saw herself to be more of an independent woman with her own ideals and goals. They both talked about it every now and then, both agreeing they weren't in any rush to settle down and have kids. That was until Tulip had an unplanned pregnancy and the topic of kids was brought up again. While Calum wasn't planned at the start, they both agree it would be nice to have a kid and see how things go about from there. After a while of thinking about children, Carson was getting a little too excited and that excitement was starting to rub off on Tulip. She eventually couldn't wait to have their first child.

C = Cuddle (How do they cuddle?)

The preferred position they cuddle in is the sweetheart cradle. Carson would lie on his back and hold onto Tulip while she rests her head on his chest. Another position they cuddle in is the arm draper. They'll both lie on the bed, facing each other with their arms draped over the other. They're also fond of resting their head on the other's lap. Especially when it involves horror movie marathons and Carson just relaxes his head on Tulip's lap and she starts scratching his head. It's a soothing feeling.

D = Dates (What are dates with them like?)

Dates can be wild for Carson and Tulip. They have a poster full of date ideas and they choose five from the list before placing those ideas on a dart board for them to hit a target. Each gets three darts and whatever idea gets the most hits that's the date they go on.

A couple favorites are paintball or laser tag. They enjoy having a bit of a competitive game as a date, it makes it more fun and exciting. Another favorite is where they go thrift shopping and pick out each other's outfit to wear on the date. Tulip picked out a nice long rainbow skirt to match with a neon green crop top for Carson while he picked out anything in yellow.

E = Everything (You are my ____ (e.g. my life, my world...))

Tulip: You are the spark to my flame

Carson: You are my twin flame

F = Feelings (When did they know they were in love?)

Carson realized he was in love with Tulip when Jae and Diego joked about how he and Tulip were always budding heads. Carson claims it as a simple rivalry on who was the better prankster of the two. Not satisfied with his answer, Jae and Diego pressed on. It eventually got to Carson spouting on and on about how ridiculous Tulip can be, before he started trailing off to all the things he liked about her. He kept going on until he noticed the looks on his friends' faces and realized just exactly what he was talking about. It didn't take too long until Jae slaps his back and loudly announces that he was a lovestruck fool.

Tulip was quick to realize her feelings for Carson. She found out she liked Carson more than a friend when he was hanging out with another girl for some time. She didn't even know why she felt bothered by it till Tonks just bluntly told her that she was falling for Carson. She of course was in denial for some time. But when Carson went out on another date with this girl, it was clearly obvious that Tulip was in fact jealous and in love with Carson. But all that jealous tension quickly died down when Carson introduced the girl as his cousin who was visiting from Scotland. Tonks couldn't stop laughing and she never let Tulip live it down.

G = Gentle (Are they gentle? If so, how?)

Being quite the charmer, Carson can be gentle. It's in his words and gestures. He always addresses Tulip in terms of endearment and when he does, his voice is tender and filled with so much love and emotion. Carson gives great foot massages, so he always gives Tulip a massage whether or not she asks for one.

Tulip's a bit more forward with her affection, most of it is done through actions than words. Whenever Carson is sitting down and Tulip is standing behind him, she'll place her hands on his shoulders and give him a gentle massage. Head scratches are another thing she often does for him whenever they're both just lounging about in the comfort of their own home.

H = Hands (How do they like to hold hands?)

The way they hold hands often involves being wrapped around one another. They'll be sitting next to each other and Carson will have his arm draped over Tulip's shoulder and she'll reach her hand up to hold his own. The other one is similar to this but instead of sitting, they're standing. One of them will be behind the other, arms wrapped around their body while the other's arms are crossed to intertwine their hands.

I = Impression (What was their first impression?)

At first, they were both annoyed with each other. They practically challenged the other every chance they got when it came to pranks. It wasn't until Veruca asked them for help with Filch when they decided to put aside their differences and work together. They were pretty amazed with how well they both were able to work together and combine their own preferred pranks into one mega bomb. Both Carson and Tulip had some new found respect for each other after this prank and often pair up to create big pranks.

J = Jealousy (Do they get jealous?)

Yes. Both of them can get jealous. When Carson gets jealous, he can throw a little temper tantrum and Veruca ends up being on the receiving end of it. He would eventually step in and tell the person to back off. If they can't get the hint, well Carson's old tricks come into play and if Dennis also doesn't like the person he joins in. Carson can be a bit of a mopy cry baby though and would get a little clingy when Tulip realizes what's going on.

When Tulip gets jealous, she broods about it for a moment before setting up a mega dungbomb in the person's belongings. After hearing a loud explosion and seeing them run off screaming, Tulip is satisfied with the turn of events. Especially when Carson comes by to see it happen and he just burst out laughing. He pretty much knows who was responsible but feigned ignorance when asked about it.

K = Kiss (How do they kiss? Who initiated the first kiss?)

Their first kiss had a bit of an outside help. On their second date, being paintball war, Dennis tagged along for the fun. It ended with Tulip getting the most hits on Carson. They were in the middle of talking where Carson was congratulating her, until Dennis basically jumped into the back of Carson's head pushing him forward, making him kiss Tulip. They pulled apart, a little awkwardly if it wasn't for the smug mocking croak coming from Dennis. Carson clearly wasn't amused but Tulip pulled him in for another kiss.

L = Love (Who says 'I love you' first?)

While Carson does like to express his affections towards Tulip, he's never actually said that he loved her before. Tulip didn't seem to mind since she was perfectly fine with how they express their affection. It wasn't until seeing just how romantically sappy Diego and Veruca were and how Jae points out that they haven't said it to each other yet. During one of their night outs to the bar they frequent, Diego and Veruca announce they finally started dating. In the middle of the excitement, Carson pulls Tulip closer to him and finally says those three magical words. It may not be romantically special, but it was perfect to them.

M = Memory (What's their favourite memory together?)

Carson's favorite memory together was during the Celestial Ball. Tulip didn't have a date, and while Carson didn't go with anyone either, he promised her a dance. After Carson went through his rounds dancing with everyone who attended the ball alone, it was Tulip's turn to dance with him. He wasn't used to her dressing up, so seeing her in a dress was a nice surprise. They both had a fun time just laughing and dancing the night away.

Tulip's favorite memory of them together involved filling the entire Ravenclaw common room full of glitter and dungbomb filled balloons. They set it up to it popping on the dungbombs time, so everyone caught in the room were covered in glitter and dungbomb stench. The amount of trouble and the looks on everyone's faces were the highlights of that day. Even when they were in detention they couldn't stop laughing, Flitwick had to extend their punishment time.

N = Nickel (Do they spoil? Do they buy the person they love everything?)

At the start of their relationship, Carson went all out with the tulip and balloon bouquets. It had to take Dennis biting onto him or croaking in refusal to get Carson to stop spoiling Tulip with all the bouquets. Other than the bouquets, Carson does buy her a lot of outfits that accentuate her figure, or even pins and necklaces from Zonko's as a reminder of her love for pranks.

Whenever Tulip is out and she happens to see some band merchandise, especially for bands Carson loves, she'll buy some for him. She buys mostly for the shirts and bandanas than the posters and pins. Carson definitely prefers them since they're everyday uses. Although she buys them for him, she sometimes steals the shirts whenever they're going to bed.

O = Orange (What colour reminds them of their other half?)

Red reminds Carson of Tulip all because of her hair. Every time he finds anything red, he instantly thinks it would look great on Tulip, something that would compliment her natural beauty.

Fuschia reminds Tulip of Carson. Despite blue being a color Carson often wears, his favorite color is fuschia. She's often reminded of the pink colored shirts he likes to wear with the Twisted Sister logo on them. Whenever she finds something completely ridiculous in that color, she'd send him a picture of it with the caption "This is clearly you" 

P = Pet names (What pet names do they use?)

Carson likes to use many names for Tulip. Most common one would be Cherry for her hair. Other names he calls her are Babes, Cuddle Cakes, My Flame, Hotness, and Troublemaker. He also started calling themselves the Gruesome Twosome after Tulip's mother called them out of slight annoyance.

Tulip doesn't often use pet names, but when she does it's a mix between Dream Boy, Hot Stuff, Muffinhead, and Prince Charming. She mostly uses them as a way to tease him or feign annoyance with him.

Q = Quaint (What is their favourite non-modern thing?)

Carson has a collection of old VHS movies. He usually keeps them displayed but some nights they'll have an old movie marathon. With Tulip, she sometimes challenges herself with watching the sunset and the sunrise in one day. She isn't entirely a morning person, so to watch the sunrise at least once every now and then can be a fun way to challenge herself to get out of bed. Carson sometimes joins her in this little activity.

R = Rainy Day (What do they like to do on a rainy day?)

On a rainy day when both of them are simply bored, they'll sit on the sofa while slow music plays in the background and they're drinking hot chocolate. On other rainy days, they would go out and have a little water day. They'll chase each other around and jump around in puddles.

S = Sad (How do they cheer themselves/others up?)

Dennis usually gets involved when Tulip is sad. If Carson's hot chocolate or blueberry muffins don't help comfort her, Dennis will jump onto Carson and stick his tongue into Carson's ear. He'll latch onto him and cause Carson to start shuffling around trying to get the darn toad off of him. Surely enough, Tulip will start laughing at them.

When Carson is sad, Tulip sometimes brings out the board games or turns on the ghost hunting channel. She also tries to make the blueberry muffins his mother often makes for him. Sadly, she isn't much of a cook so she makes a huge mess in the kitchen. Carson walks in to see Tulip close to having a crisis in the kitchen before bursting out in laughter and he's suddenly in a better mood. He then rushes to help her clean up and then bake the muffins with her.

T = Talking (What do they like to talk about?)

Sometimes they talk about their families. While Tulip can be a little annoyed by her parents, Carson distracts her by talking about how his mother wear a dress when he was five. They often talk about past prank wars and old memories. Tulip likes to bring up all the times Carson cried about puffskeins just appearing out of nowhere, embarrassing him just a little bit.

Date ideas often come up, and whatever isn't on their date list they'll talk about it before adding it to the list.

They also love to reminisce about the times they annoy both Chester and Andre. Carson just has crazy fashion ready for when Andre wants to use him as a model and the atrocity he has to face when Carson comes out with the most ridiculous outfit. 

U = Unencumbered (What helps them relax?)

Carson is actually a fan of health and skin care, so coming home to see Tulip having the face masks out he tosses his work to the side and throws himself onto the sofa to ready for some relaxation. They both also listen to music and well, sing together. Most of the music they listen to range from 80s rock, pop, funk, and a little bit of R&B and Jazz. Two terrible singers paired together so perfectly, neighbors must hate them. Carson also plays the violin if Tulip is having a stress day. The melodious sound that comes from the instrument helps soothe her from getting a headache.

V = Vaunt (What do they like to show off? What are they proud of?)

They both like to show off their intelligence, which usually comes into play with their pranks. They try to one up the other by performing a prank that can be seen as more superior than the other.

They also like to show each other off. Mainly when someone tries to bring down the other, they'll start singing a bunch of praises and all the accomplishments their partner has done. They're kind of the jealous, boasting couple. 

W = Wedding (When, how, where do they propose?)

Yes. You know that meme on Proposal Instructions? This one.

These were clearly joke proposals they both did just to get a laugh out of each other.

It was also a double proposal. On one of their dates to a paintball park, they invited a few friends for a group date. They were all pretty much in on the plan but didn't know the other half had the same idea. Tulip was the first to propose which made Carson stop and go, "Are you freaking serious?" before pulling out the ring to propose to her with. Everyone got a good laugh out of it.

X = Xylophone (What's their song?)

Nothing's Gonna Stop Us Now by Starships

Y = Yes (Do they ever think of getting married/proposing?)

Tulip at first didn't think much about it. But after both of them did joke proposals the thought has definitely crossed her mind. Just like Tulip, Carson didn't really think much of marriage until he and Tulip have been dating for a while. It definitely would be a dream to be married and it would make his parents, especially his mother, proud.

Z = Zebra (If they wanted a pet, what would they get?)

Carson absolutely doesn't want a pet. Tulip already has Dennis and he is the only one that Carson is willing to tolerate. And Tulip is perfectly fine with just having Dennis as a pet. That is of course until they have Raylene and she wanted to keep a piglet they found hurt in the woods while on a camping trip. At first Carson wasn't a fan of it, but the puppy eye look his daughter was giving him made him cave.

[busterkeatonfanfic]

Chapter 26

The sun had set long ago and they were all crowded around a card table in Louise Brooks apartment, the radio playing “Side by Side” by the Paul Whiteman Orchestra. Sipping a glass of bourbon, Louise was humming merrily along, but Nelly’s lips were set in concentration. She wasn’t a good bridge player by any measure, but the important thing was that she was getting better. They were in no danger of hitting a grand slam, but Buster thought they might be able to get a small slam out of the game. Keeping his eyes on their cards, he tilted his whiskey glass to his lips, emptying it. 

“Top you off?” said Louise.

Buster looked at Nelly, who raised an eyebrow. “Not tonight,” he said, and saw Nelly’s shoulders relax. He kissed her behind the ear and saw her cheeks redden in the lamplight.

George laid down a seven of clubs, Buster threw in a five of clubs, Louise put in a four of diamonds, and Nelly swept the trick for them with a six of diamonds. George had a good poker face. Louise’s was skilled simply by virtue of the fact that she was usually in a good humor whether her hand was bad or good. Nelly needed to work on hers. She straightened her expression as if hearing his thoughts. 

He’d been living a double life for years now, but with Nelly in the picture, it had lately become a triple life. Buster One was the gay host always ready for sport, drink, and good company. The quiet man left in the gay fellow’s wake was Buster Two, who never forgot that Lady Luck would decide someday to be done with him, and maybe soon. Buster Three was content to spend afternoons and evenings with his girl in her small apartment where she watched him work out gags for Snap Shots and sat patiently as he gave her bridge lessons. She found him pleasing in bed, and never complained that the only dance floor he led her across was her living-room carpet and their only orchestra the tabletop phonograph he’d bought her. As February gave way to March, his routine of visiting her apartment two or three days a week for a couple hours at a time seldom changed. Twice he’d taken her for a drive into the Valley, although that was always risky in case someone recognized his car as he left town and got to wondering about the girl in the passenger seat. Last weekend they’d had their first bridge game with George and Louise, the first time anyone else had seen them together. Nelly had had the time of her life. 

Buster Three couldn’t help wanting more, though. He longed to take her to a picture or have her on his arm during a premiere or benefit, dressed to the nines. He imagined her warming his bed at night, swimming laps in his pool in the morning, and playing bridge games in the billiards room on weekday afternoons. He was finding out that a mistress was a funny thing that way. The more you got of her, the more you wanted.

He stroked her back as she looked over at his hand, deciding which card to play next. They could take at least five more tricks by his count, which would put them at eight. Whether Nelly would spot them was the question. They were playing for a nickel a point. He’d wanted to do quarters, but Nelly had complained about how bad she was and insisted on a lower bet, so he let her have her way. 

It was now getting close to ten o’clock. He knew they’d have to wrap the game up in the next half hour if he wanted to be home by midnight. It was the first time he’d stayed out so late with Nelly and not told Natalie where he was going.

“Just Molly and me,” Louise sang in a soft, idle voice, examining her cards. “And baby makes three. We’re happy in my blue heaven.”

Nelly yawned and he rubbed her back. “Don’t worry, I’ll get you home soon, sweetheart,” he said in her ear. 

Nelly responded with a smile and he was gratified to watch her discard a three of diamonds in the next moment. He was pretty sure he could take the trick with a Jack of diamonds if neither George nor Louise played the Queen.

They left the apartment at a quarter to eleven, many nickels richer. Louise kissed Nelly goodbye on both cheeks. It made Buster happy to see the girls get along so well.

“How’d I do tonight?” said Nelly, as they walked through the darkness toward his Lincoln town car, holding hands. 

“You’ll be able to play pro soon at the rate you’re going.”

She squeezed his hand. “Don’t tease.”

“Well okay, but we can start playing for quarters any day now.”

“Maybe dimes,” she said, laughing. “Maybe.” Another big yawn hit her. 

“Don't fall asleep yet, you hear? I have things in mind for you.”

“What kind of things?” she said. From her flirtatious tone, he had a pretty good idea that she already knew.

“Let me take you home and I’ll show you.”

Though she was falling asleep on her feet by the time he parked on Genesee Avenue, she allowed him to walk her inside, persuade her onto the couch, and lift up her skirts. That gave her a second wind and she joined in the excursion with enthusiasm. When they were done and he’d buttoned his trousers back up, he watched her wander around the apartment in nothing but her garter belt and stockings, getting ready for bed. Apart from the nudie show, which he enjoyed tremendously, he found he’d missed watching her take down her hair and return from the washroom wearing it in braids, her cheeks shining from scrubbing her face. Tonight the routine was the same except that she was in the buff. He grinned, looking forward to having something to think about on Monday morning when the tedious conversations about Snap Shots resumed with the M-G-M brass and his surplus writers.

After Nelly had brushed her teeth, he followed her into her bedroom and watched her get into underthings and a pink sleeveless nightgown with ivory lace at the bodice. 

“Sticking around to tell me a bedtime story?” she said, giving him an impudent smile. 

He swatted her derrière in rebuke as she climbed into bed and drew the covers over her. “Sure. What’ll it be?” He sat on the side of the bed. 

“I don’t care. Surprise me.”

“Once upon a time Charles Lindbergh flew over the Atlantic to find the prettiest girl in the world.”

Nelly giggled. “Oh, is that what his flights are about?”

“He gets to England. Nothing worth seeing. Same story in France and Italy and Indonesia.”

“Indonesia’s not in Europe.” Nelly was laughing, but her eyes had also closed. 

“Who’s telling this story?” he said, tapping her shoulder. “So he gets back in the airplane, flies all the way across the Atlantic again. Gets to New York. All the dames he sees look like dogs practically. Well, he gets back into the airplane again and he commences to visit every state he can, Pennsylvania, Florida, Mississippi, Tennessee. You name it, he visits it. It’s no good. He never saw such ugly girls. Any how, he’s running low on fuel for his airplane and he decides to make a stop in Chicago.”

“Mmm,” said Nelly. Her lids were beginning to twitch. 

“While he’s there he goes and sees the sights. He takes an elevator up to the very top of the Tribune Tower. Guess who he meets on the top, top floor?”

Nelly sighed. 

“Miss Nelly Foster, that’s who. That’s how he found the prettiest girl in the world.” He leaned over and kissed her forehead. She gave a vague smile at the caress, but otherwise was out like a light. “G’night, sweetheart.”

He collected his jacket and locked her front door with the key she’d given him, which was in his pocket more often than not these days. It was half past midnight by the time he made it home. He half-expected Nate to be waiting in the sitting room or at the foot of the stone staircase demanding to know where he’d been, but the house was silent and dimly lit; he stubbed his toe on his way to the kitchen to see what Caruthers had left in the refrigerator.

Standing in the kitchen eating cold roast and cold cooked carrots from a priceless bone china plate a few minutes later, he was back to being Buster Two, bewildered that this could be his life. Buster wasn’t half bad at Shakespeare. The problem was that Nelly could barely recite her lines without laughing over his sober-faced version of Olivia, who spoke in a high, breathy voice. “Stay,” he would say, “I prithee, tell me what thou thinkest of me,” and clutch his hands in front of his heart so earnestly she would be in stitches. 

“That you do think you are not what you are,” she’d answer, giggling. 

She had a feeling he was trying to cut her up on purpose, but the straight face never faltered. After a half hour of practicing, Nelly called it a day. She would just have to learn the lines on her own. Buster seemed content to set aside the little green Arden Shakespeare edition of Twelfth Night. He drew his legs onto the sofa and put his head in her lap. She ran her hand through his thick dark hair as he closed his eyes. “You’re burning the candle again, Olivia.”

“Hmmph,” he said.

“Auditions are next Monday night. If I get the part, you’ll have plenty of time to help me rehearse my lines, I guess. The play doesn’t open ‘til the second week of June.”

Buster opened his eyes. “About that.” His brows were pinched.

“What?” she said.

“I’m leaving for New York on the seventh,” he said with a grim expression. 

“Oh.” She’d known in an abstract way that Snap Shots took place in New York, but somehow she’d failed to imagine that Buster might shoot on location. Knowing now how he had traveled in order to film Our Hospitality, The General, and Steamboat, it was a conclusion she should have come to. “How long will you be gone?”

Buster sighed. “July. If I’m lucky.”

“How long have you known?” she said, wondering why he had waited to bring it up to her. 

“Awhile. Before we started going together. Guess I just thought the day’d never get here.”

“I’ll miss you,” she said frankly, as she combed her fingers through his hair. 

“I know,” said Buster. “I’ve been thinking about how to get around it. Maybe I’ll send for you at the halfway point or something. You ever been to New York?”

“Not once,” she said. She briefly considered the practicalities of traveling all the way across the country while trying to keep her job at United Artists and, if her tryout with the Los Angeles Players Company was successful, star in a play at the same time. She was also thinking of his wife, who would doubtless accompany him. Buster, always so honest and hopeful when he built castles in the air, plainly had not thought of this.

“Well, I got some good news, anyway. That was the bad news. Wanna hear it?” He looked up at her so earnestly that she couldn’t resist bending her head to kiss his mouth. 

“Of course.

“I just rented a place just outside the M-G-M lot. A bungalow. Figured it’d save me some time going home every day. Plus you could stay the night. I got it all worked out.”

“Oh?” It sounded risky, but her stomach fluttered at the idea. 

“Sure. I’ll pick you up and take you there after dark. We get up before the sun comes up and no one’s the wiser. I can get you over to United Artists in the  morning.”

The scheme was more than a little hairbrained, but to Buster’s credit it worked. For two weeks before he left for New York, Nelly spent Monday, Wednesday, and Thursday evenings at the bungalow. It was actually a double bungalow with separate entrances, the other half belonging to Edward Sedgwick, Buster’s new director, who used it as an office during business hours. Sedgwick’s half was always dark by the time Buster ushered Nelly through the door after nightfall, though. Buster’s side of the bungalow was a combination dressing room and gymnasium. The dressing room occupied the first room and contained a stove, refrigerator, and worktop so Caruthers could whip up meals. Like Sedgwick, he too was always gone by early evening, but left a hot dinner for two ready, never asking (or so Buster said) why he was cooking for two. The second room held weight equipment, a rowing machine, a punching bag, and other exercise equipment. Nelly had learned a few weeks back that Buster’s splendid physique was not the result of pratfalls, but of dedicated training. Off the gymnasium there was a small washroom, and at the back of the house a little bedroom with a double bed, a nightstand, and a chair. It was here that Nelly would fall asleep next to Buster, waking up more often than not in his arms.

The alarm clock would ring at a rude five a.m. and Buster would reach over her to silence it. Sometimes they would make love. Other times, Buster would fall back asleep and Nelly would watch him, letting him seize a few extra minutes before reluctantly shaking him awake again. Although he had every outward appearance of boundless energy when he was around her, she could tell in the droop of his eyes and the redness that occasionally invaded them that he was always tired. It was no wonder. There were bridge games with Louise and George Marshall, often stretching until midnight, and when there weren’t bridge games, he was practicing songs on the ukulele while she studied her lines, having recently gotten the part of Maria in Twelfth Night. In spare minutes, he’d tell her about baseball games, meetings with the M-G-M bigwigs, and lunches with other stars. He didn’t seem to have a second of his day that wasn’t filled. 

One subject he didn’t discuss was his wife and children. It was as if that part of his life didn’t exist, though Nelly knew that he must spend time with them. At first, she hadn’t wanted to know about Natalie because it would have curdled her with guilt to think that she was monopolizing another woman’s husband. Now she didn’t want to know because her feelings for Buster had strengthened. She could almost convince herself that if she didn’t acknowledge that other part of his life, the fairytale that was their time together could stay in place forever.

And it was like a fairytale, even the ordinary parts, like Buster stumbling out of bed so he could go into the front room and make coffee. She loved his sleep-mussed hair and bare feet, the bleary way he groped for his pack of cigarettes and lit the first one of the day, how he would shrug on a dressing gown over his underthings—if he was even wearing underthings, which was never a guarantee when they were sharing a bed. While he was thus occupied, she would get dressed for the day and throw on a dab of lipstick and a quick brush of mascara. As the coffee percolated and Buster dressed, she’d make breakfast, either wheat cakes with eggs or steak and eggs. They always kept the curtains drawn, and if any early-morning peddler knocked on the door to attempt to sell Buster vegetables, soap, and any other number of commodities, she would creep to the back door and leave Buster to turn them down.

Despite their precautions, spending the night at the bungalow still felt dangerous. Nelly knew it would take only one pair of unfriendly eyes to spot them and the jig would be up. Buster, she thought, was much too casual on this point and she always made him double-check that none of his neighbors were peeping out of their homes as she hurried into his car between six and six-fifteen-a.m., depending on how long she’d let him sleep or whether carnal matters had preoccupied them for an extra ten minutes. Even so, it was hard to stay nervous with his cheery attitude. He had only to throw her one of his beautiful smiles, upper teeth straight and gleaming, and she would be set at her ease again.

Notes: Is this chapter too sentimental? Be honest. 

I should warn you that because life is hectic right now for me, I’ll probably go down to an every-other-week update. I was away this weekend and got to working on Chapter 26 when I returned, only to discover I needed to add just two sentences to it. -_- Sorry for the delay.  There are some anachronisms here and there will be in the future. Louise Brooks wasn’t in the States at this time. I think I did get the timing on the bungalow right, though. The opening part of the second part of this chapter takes place around March 24th.

[wu-sisyphus-gang]

Motion Sickness Chapter 38

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"How long are you going to follow me, you mute bitch?" With her teleportation and illusions there wasn't much I could do about it. We both knew if it came down to it I'd win, though. I'd shown that earlier. But she could escape anytime she wanted so I couldn't chase after her and end it. I could activate my semblance and smash her around with my strength or speed and win by standing still.

But only by standing still.

I walked past a billboard proclaiming Mercury Black, Emerald Sustrai, Cinder Fall, Hazel Rainart, and the Scorpion as wanted. My friends lived. I'd go spy on them later, when Neapolitan wasn't watching. Just to check up on them. Then I'd head my separate way.

She rapidly poked one finger through a loop in the other hand. "Fuck," I interpreted. She pointed at me. "Myself."

She clapped her hands giddily in her approval and her eyes switched colors.

"I need money," I muttered. "And a new scroll. I don't suppose you have any ideas."

She reached out into an illusion and retrieved a red brimmed hat.

"Ones that don't involve Ruby. I really seriously don't know where she is."

She looked like she didn't believe me, eyebrows furrowed.

"Well tough shit. Unless you want to go another round." She rubbed her chest where I hit her. "I'd be all for that."

She just frowned.

"Fair enough," I said. "Why do you even want to find Ruby?"

She drew a line over her throat and fondled the red and black hat.

"You want revenge for Roman Torchwick."

She nodded.

"Ruby didn't kill your boss." I dropped the harsh news on her.

She cocked her head sideways at me as we walked together through Mistral. It was… it was actually nice to have someone to talk to. Talk at, even. Otherwise I'd be alone with my thoughts and that just wouldn't be good for me. I was still wishy-washy on ending my own life.

I deserved it too. I wanted to die for what I'd done to my friends. I was the culprit, the thief in the night who robbed them of the opportunity of ever being 'together, together.'

At least they were together in death, now.

"A Grimm got him," she frowned up at me at that. "You can't even get revenge." I laughed. "You poor bitch. Not that I'm any better." Who was I supposed to kill in my hunt for vengeance now? Me. And believe me I was thinking of ways of getting to that son of a bitch. Unfortunately he was running out of friends.

An alien goddess had control over my mind. I was little more than a puppet under the right circumstances. I suppose if I had been like a puppet, all uncoordinated, Ren and Nora might have had a chance at subduing me. Instead I'd acted more or less fluid. That was a little scarier. Or a lot.

She smashed one fist into the other.

"If you were going to kill me you would have done it back at the bar. Don't act. You can't pull it off. Not while I'm awake and I assure you I'll be on my guard while sleeping. You won't get it done then either, not with my aura level."

She gave me an adorable pout. Her pink lips pressed together and out. Her pink and brown hair flowing over her shoulders.

"I know how you feel. I need revenge against Cinder. You know her? Cinder Fall?"

Her grin stretched.

"Don't tell me you want to kill her too? Did she get your boss killed? Set him up?"

She nodded.

"That's as good as killing him, I suppose. I think we may be able to help each other. Ruby really didn't kill him. Ruby doesn't have it in her to kill somebody. She always goes out of her way to avoid it."

She frowned and pointed at me.

"She's not like me. I'm a murderous asshole."

She shook her head indicating I'd guessed wrong and pointed at me again.

"What about me?"

She rotated one finger next to her head.

"I am crazy. Don't even get me started. If nothing else I'm suicidally insane. And that doesn't even get to these bugs in my eyes."

She pantomimed doing a line of hyper. Pinching one side of her nose and breathing in.

"I'm not on anything. I'm just fucked up."

She touched the tips of opposite forefingers together.

"What's that mean? It's not the same thing."

We walked in two-sided silence for a few minutes down a rainy street.

"You know where somebody with a loose moral compass can make some money around here relatively fast?"

She pointed a thumb over her shoulder back at Malachite's bar.

"Yeah, I sorta burned that bridge. And it can't involve Don Corneo. I had him tortured. Killed a bunch of his men, too."

Her smile widened looking up at me.

"Oh is that how you get your jollies?"

She just grinned up at me.

"Well I suppose we could just do official huntsman work. That's always lucrative."

She pointed a finger between us.

"Yeah I thought you were following me. That makes it an us. Keep up. Plus I just might be your best shot at murdering Fall. I almost fuckin' had her. And I might know where she's headed next."

She looked at me in surprise.

"Yep. Her and Black, too. Fought them relatively recently."

She put a hand to her mouth and silently laughed at me.

"Yeah they lived. Go ahead and giggle. Next time I'll get one of them. At least one of them. Well, Cinder has the powers of the spring maiden now. It might be even harder than before."

She gave me a confused look. Hell, who was she going to tell? She was… easy to talk to besides. I wasn't sure if it was the muteness but it might be.

"It's a whole thing. Ancient powers passed along person to person. Myths and legends. It's fucking bullshit is what it is. Girls only club. So maybe you could get in on that action."

She silently snorted, full of doubt. A little air escaping her nose.

"It's true. You can be the one to fight her and find out the hard way or you can take my word for it. She's even more dangerous now. And she was already a heaping pile of it before. I surprised her yesterday and I'm only getting stronger from what I've seen but she just added a big helping of power to herself."

She pointed at herself then smashed one fist into her open palm to indicate violence.

"Could you beat her?"

She nodded. Letting me know I'd guessed right.

"Maybe. Maybe before but probably not now. You'd be in serious trouble. I'd be in serious trouble." I let that sink in, I was able to beat this ice-cream girl and if I was not able to beat Cinder that only meant she wouldn't be able to either.  

She made a complicated series of gestures.

"I didn't get that. But it doesn't matter, does it?"

She just frowned at me and I strode forward. She was practically jogging to keep up and I had no intention of slowing down.

The relic jingled by my side as I walked.

"You know maybe it can involve Don Corneo. You up for stealing from a mob boss? It might involve torture and death. I could use someone with your talents."

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Some broken limbs and I learned the news (Neapolitan had clapped at that). Don Corneo was holed up in his mansion with a whole lot of guards and probably a whole lot of money. Evidently he hadn't taken being tortured very well.

Go figure.

Neapolitan or just Neo was working beside me and honestly it felt good to have somebody watching my back, even if they were criminal scum. Which, I mean, beggars couldn't be choosers from their glass houses.

I needed a pseudonym. I could hardly keep calling myself Jaune Arc even though my weapon and face would be recognizable. I needed a haircut and makeover and a new name. I had to hide from my friends as much as it bit at me.

I was lucky they hadn't reported me to the police. The wounds on Nora and Ren's bodies would be unmistakable as coming from my weapon.

More importantly I needed the money to do all that. I was a long ways away from hopping on a horse and riding out to Merlot's laboratory, as much as I may want to. Instead I needed to stay in the city for a while.

That meant laying low and coming up with a heist. I needed money. Enough that I didn't have to worry about it for a long time.

I was struggling to come up with a new name for myself. That was always the hardest part. Names. I thought that as I broke one of Don Corneo's lackeys' fingers.

Neo and I had him tied down in a hotel room on the lower levels. It was dirt cheap and nobody would ask any questions. Especially if we left no body behind.

He screamed into a gag and it came out muffled. Nickel was the name we managed to get out of him.

"Shshsh." I told him. "You're going to tell me the security details on Don Corneo's mansion or I'm going to break every last bone in your body. If you scream I'll hurt you even more than that. Are we clear? Everything goes well and you get to walk on out of here. You might have to find a new boss but that doesn't really matter compared to your life, does it?"

He seemed to realize I was actually waiting for a response and gave a slow shake of his head. I nodded at Neo and she pulled out the gag.

"Now, what's the security look like?"

"He's going to kill you for this, he's going to-"

Neo gave a lecherous grin and stabbed him through the foot. Who was this guy fooling? He didn't even have aura. There was no way the Don cared about him a Lien. Not that we cared considering we were planning to rob him blind. She covered his mouth with the other hand, not that we really needed to down here per se, and looked him in the eye.

Her gaze flickered out like a hungry lizard's tongue to meet his eyes and devour all of the pain therein.

"Boy you don't even have aura. I can fix that for you. Unlock your aura and make it all go away." He was older than me, probably by a few years. Might be twenty-one, twenty-two. I watched him consider it. Aura was a game changer. A kid like him had to know what it meant, what it could mean. It'd mean a pay raise if nothing else. It meant increased survivability. It meant the power to fight back against those dastardly huntsmen.

"I can make the pain go away too. It'll heal you right up, even your broken fingers." They were tied behind his back. Nice and easy within snapping distance. "What's it going to be, my man."

"Fuck you, I ain't your man."

I broke another one of his fingers. Neo stuffed the gag back in his mouth while he screamed.

"We're not making much headway with this one. Might have to kill him and grab a fresh one. Start over." I said it clinically to Neo. Her eyes went wide at the thought of the violence. I even thought maybe the tips of her breasts were protruding more than before from the excitement. She gave a silent laugh and I hoped it was just my imagination. For my part I didn't have a carnage boner.

A murder erection I distinctly did not have. I wasn't a sadist. Just a pragmatist.

I had to admit there was a bit of an endorphin rush at the thought of snapping this guy's neck, though. With Neo's semblance we'd just walked up and grabbed him from the mansion and we'd walked away, under the cover of an illusion.

Suddenly I had some symptoms come at me and I blinked hard at the tactile sensation of bugs in my eyes until they stopped. Nerves firing which shouldn't have been.

"I'm thinking maybe we just hammer the place. Go all in and kill everyone in our way," I said. "Your thoughts, Neapolitan?"

She stamped a foot.

"Beg your pardon, I meant Neo." I hadn't but she seemed content to insist on it now that I'd figured it out. I took it as a good sign.

"M-m-m. M-m-m." Came from under the gag.

"Sorry, do you have friends in there? Some buddies perhaps?"

Neo pulled the gag out of his mouth. Nickel spat on the floor, very much not in our directions. He didn't want another broken finger was what that told me.

"You'll never make it like that. The Don has a safe room. A panic vault. You'll never get in and get what you want that way."

"And you've telling us this now because…"

"I want a cut. He's got millions stashed away. A-and I want my aura unlocked... And I walk free."

So that's how it is. Money talks, money talks. Apparently louder than broken bones could.

"Tell me about this panic room."

"It's got Titania walls and big electric locks."

"What kind?"

"The fuck should I know? It's like you see in bank vaults though. His office is in there. Or at least it is now they moved it from the second floor. He's been paranoid. There's been talk."

"Talk about how somebody got to him." I nodded. I put my face in his. "Somebody did. I'm going to do it again."

"It was you. It was you at the Honey Bee Inn." His brown eyes went wide.

"Maybe. Tell me about the mansion."

"It's built with choke points in mind. And places we're supposed to go to to lay down fire if there's an assault. It's all built around this central courtyard, too. It has mines in the walls, explosives at every corridor. They can be remotely activated by the Don. The whole place is booby-trapped. It’s supposed to be huntsman proof.”

“Nothing is actually huntsman proof."

He shrugged but the fact he was panting hard ruined the illusion of calm. "Couldn't say."

"Talk to me about the patrols you were on.”

“They’re fairly strict about it. Somebody will have noticed I’m gone, even. Every hour on the hour and through the center courtyard. Around the building, too.”

“How many?”

“A hundred of us at a given time, maybe."

A hundred could be a problem. Especially if they had proper choke points and the right hardware. Hard light weapons or magnetically accelerated rifles were huntsman level. There were also electric weapons which I was sure could find Neo, invisible or not. I'd seen Neptune use one. An explosion could also take me down. Limit was good but I wasn't invincible.

"Aura?"

"Some of us have it, some of us don't. The Don hasn't been in a position to be picky about his men. Not with his empire crumbling under pressure to the Malachites."

I leaned back and folded my arms. I exchanged looks with Neo. She flickered in and out of the visible spectrum and warbled a hand.

"Might be too many to just walk in to. Plus the explosives. They gonna be a problem for you?"

She waved her hand again.

"Samesies," I grunted.

I had him walk me through the layout of the place in enough detail that I was able to draw a map of the first and second floor. The panic office was on the bottom floor. A big, heavy thing like that couldn't be above ground.

Neo gave me a pleading look and I nodded. She walked behind Nickel and she bent down like she was going to untie him. Giving him one last shred of hope before she snapped up and slit his throat. I watched her take extreme pleasure in doing it.

She shuddered with the living corpse as his lifeblood drained soundlessly onto the floor. She looked ecstatic in the company of death. A low narrow smile on her lips.

It was clear to me. I just needed to give her lots of targets. It seemed like it had been a long time since she was able to indulge in such things. Heists. Murder. All of it. Money must trickle. The blood must flow.

Most importantly I needed to keep her focused on Cinder rather than Ruby. I think the message was starting to sink in but she could relapse. Besides, I wanted Cinder to die and another body wouldn't hurt.

I just needed to make sure she didn't run out of her little pleasures and it seemed to me like I'd have a loyal ally. Underneath it all it seemed like she was just lonely and scared. Especially without her boss. I think there was a part of her that liked taking orders.

And weren't we all like all that? I was like that without Ruby for one. I wasn't sure she would approve of this but she probably didn't approve of me murdering our friends either so there was that.

Neo didn't seem so bad. A bit of a sadist but hey, me too. There was a part of me that took sick pleasure in bringing ruin to my enemies. There was a sideways joy in delivering a boot to their faces.  

And my friends… if I ever saw them again they'd have to understand. I did what I had to to find out about Merlot… this… my father. I had so many memories. Like visiting Shion. We're they all fake? I had to learn more about myself.  If I had to shake hands with a few demons to make it happen then big fucking whoop.

Neo looked at the blood on her stiletto and wiped it off on the Nickel's clothes.

I could work with this. I could live with this. I just needed to throw away my pride.

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-WG

[catxsnow]

fluff alphabet with gar logan:)

A = Attractive (What do they find attractive about the other?)

Gar 100% is the most attracted to your face. He loves staring at you when your cuddling in bed or across the room when you're talking to friends. You're the first thing that he wants to see when he wakes up in the morning and the last thing at night

B = Baby (Do they want a family? Why/Why not?)

Obviously he's too young for a kid right now but Gar can't wait to have a family with you. His parent's died when he was young so he wants to give your kid the best childhood that they could possibly have. The idea of seeing a mini him and you running around is what he looks forward to the most. 

C = Cuddle (How do they cuddle?)

Little spoon. I'm not even gonna elaborate on this. 

D = Dates (What are dates with them like?)

He likes to be lowkey with the dates. Staying in the tower, ordering some food and Marathon some movies is his favourite go to. Otherwise, he'll take you to the arcade because he misses gaming a lot. 

E = Everything (You are my ____ (e.g. my life, my world...))

You are the light of my life. 

F = Feelings (When did they know they were in love?)

Gar knew he loved you when you came to comfort him one night. It was shortly after Trigon possessed all his friends and they beat the living crap out of him (you included). You were the only one that repeatedly kept asking to see if he was fine. Gar loved your empathy and concern. 

G = Gentle (Are they gentle? If so, how?)

The most gentle soul ever. After he killed that man at the asylum he swore that he would never let you see that side of him. He became the most loving gentle person you had ever seen in your life. H = Hands (How do they like to hold hands?)

Gar isn't committed to any one way. He just loved holding you in anyway possible. However, he loves it most when you're spooning and you hold his hand. I = Impression (What was their first impression?)

It was wild. The first time he saw you was when you were a total badass fighting alongside Robin. However, the second that you were finished fighting you turned into this excited kid. He knew that you guys were going to be best friends from the second you said hi to him. J = Jealousy (Do they get jealous?)

Not at all. Gar trusts you so much he knows he has no reason to be jealous. K = Kiss (How do they kiss? Who initiated the first kiss?)

You initiated the first kiss. In public he'll never give you anything more than a peck but when it's just the two of you its far more intimate. Gar loves long lingering kisses that make him want to melt at your touch. L = Love (Who says 'I love you' first?)

Gar does. He couldn't contain his excitement one day and blurted it out. You knew he meant it because he didn't think twice about saying it. M = Memory (What's their favourite memory together?)

Gar's favourite memory of you was your first time to the arcade. The neon lights shining against your skin and the smile on your face were always etched into his brain. It was the best night of your lives. He finally had some sort of competition against the games and the two of you finally got to be yourselves for the first time in a long time. N = Nickel (Do they spoil? Do they buy the person they love everything?)

Gar doesn't really buy you anything. If he does it'll be something sentimental and meaningful. O = Orange (What colour reminds them of their other half?)

Yellow. He always sees the bright side of you and yellow just reminds him of that. P = Pet names (What pet names do they use?)

kitten. babe, hun, honey Q = Quaint (What is their favourite non-modern thing?)

his record player. He loves playing old songs that you and him can dance to. There's nothing better than a rainy day and his music playing while swaying around in his room. One time Dick walked in on the two of you and he had never been more happy that he started the old team up again. R = Rainy Day (What do they like to do on a rainy day?)

All he wants to do is watch movies with you in bed while cuddled up under some blankets. Also hot chocolate and snacks. He brings out a very lazy side of you because you always try to convince him to train on days like those and he manages to change your mind every time. S = Sad (How do they cheer themselves/others up?)

Gar will crack ridiculously bad jokes until he sees you smile. He also holds you while you let it all out. There's nothing more that he hates than seeing you sad.

If he's the one in a bad mood all he wants is to be in your arms. He doesn't want to talk about it, he just needs to know that you're there for him. T = Talking (What do they like to talk about?)

Gar likes to talk about his video games. He also loves to talk about the different books he reads - anything that he can just totally dive in about. Half the time you just enjoy listening to him talk about the things that he loves U = Unencumbered (What helps them relax?)

Gar will listen to music for hours. Whether he's laying in bed while you're snuggled into his side or just doing things around his room. Music helps him relax so much it doesn't even matter what he's doing while listening to it. V = Vaunt (What do they like to show off? What are they proud of?)

You. Gar's biggest accomplishment in life was managing to snag you as his S/O. He loves to show you off to anyone that he can because he was the one that managed to get you to date him. W = Wedding (When, how, where do they propose?)

Gar doesn't propose for a long time down the road. He waits until your hero lives have settled down a lot. He does it at the diner that you had your first date at. Gar does the cheesy move of getting the waitress to write 'will you marry me' with like caramel sauce or some shit on your desert plate. X = Xylophone (What's their song?)

Up all night by blink-182. Idk why but I'm just feeling it. Y = Yes (Do they ever think of getting married/proposing?)

every. damn. day. Z = Zebra (If they wanted a pet, what would they get?)

He is the pet.

[randomoranges]

we’re halfway there??? does that make anyone feel better? lamao

more warning for another minor character death lamao!

The Five Times Étienne Fell in Love

PART III

 It takes Étienne a while before he starts again once the storm of emotions has come and gone really. Edward nearly insists they stop for now, but just as he’s about to, Étienne picks up the conversation again.

 “It was decades – hell almost a century later, when I ran into Nicolas, quite by accident really. He was missing a nickel for the tramway fare and I happened to be right behind him. On top of that, he didn’t really speak French and I could tell the driver was getting irritated, so I stepped in and paid for him. Everyone seemed appeased and I didn’t think much of it, but we ended up sitting besides each other and he started chatting to me – I didn’t mind; he was very cute and his accents was utterly endearing.”

 “It turned out that his parents had immigrated after the first war. A relative of theirs had settled here and so his parents had followed afterwards. Nicolas was born shortly after they arrived, and he’d always considered himself British. He hadn’t really taken to the French vibe of the city, but at the time, it didn’t really bother me. He was handsome and cute with his deep blue eyes and charming smile, and he could have spoken a completely different language and it would have been fine!” Étienne laughs at that, amused by his own tale.

 “We ended up talking throughout the entire ride and both realised we had missed our stops when we got to the end of it. The driver had to tell us to get off. We were in a part of town he was unfamiliar with, and I volunteered to show him around – maybe to show him how nice the city was, maybe to stay with him a little longer – maybe even both. Whether out of genuine curiosity or growing interest, he agreed and so we spent the better part of that afternoon walking around town.”

 Edward can easily imagine Étienne coming to the aid of a cute stranger and then playing tour guide for them. Hell, Étienne’s played tour guide with him a number of times and it’s a role that suits him quite well. Étienne has a knack for making the city come alive as he weaves tales about it and he’s very skilled in finding all the right places one ought to see.

 “I was fascinated by him – his accent, his upbringing and his view of the world. He wasn’t like the usual people I hung around with and maybe that’s what pulled me to him initially. He was into different things, he played different sports, he read different books – everything about him was borderline exotic.  By the end of the evening, we were famished, so we went to one of my favourite restaurants for dinner. He was so funny – the way his nose crinkled when I suggested some items on the menu or how he laughed when I purposely mispronounced things in English.”

 “What was most surprising though, was at the end of the night, when we were headed back towards our respective places, he asked me if I wanted to come over – for a night cap or some other bogus excuse. I wasn’t exactly sure I was reading him correctly, but I thought that was extremely bold of him – to ask so openly and shortly after meeting me, even if it was just for a drink. I obviously said yes. I had enjoyed our time together and even if he would have been straight, he was easy on the eyes and interesting to listen to, so it was an easy decision to make.”

 “He actually did go through the motions when we got to his place; a charming little apartment that was the perfect size for a single guy. He did offer me a drink, which I accepted, but once the it was served and we were seated, I don’t have to paint you a picture of what happened next. He was very forward, which was surprising, considering, and also a nice change of pace. It was still risky of him – I could have gone to the police about his advances and he could have been prosecuted, but he flat out sat close, placed an arm around my shoulders and then leaned in to kiss me.”

 Edward too is surprised by the forwardness of Nicholas, considering the time period and the location, but then again, Montreal had always had a bubble of exceptions that had managed to thrive, one way or another, despite the catholic stronghold that had overseen the province for decades. One thing is for sure, he envies the ease at which Nicholas seemed to have conducted his life and nearly envies him that.

 “I was shocked! Surprised! But also extremely pleased by this turn of events. This, already, was so much different from the other men I had been with up until then. This wasn’t some brave soul in a brothel, or some anonymous jacking off in a bush with some man filled with shame and self-disgust. Nicholas was self-assured and okay with who he was. He left the lights on when we kissed and he didn’t kick me out of his bed after our first time together. He kept me close and even asked me if I wanted to spend the night. I was enchanted. This felt surreal. Needless to say, I stayed that night, the one after that and we started spending a lot of time together. In fact, it almost felt as though I had moved in with him within weeks of our first meeting.”

 “Being with Nicolas was exhilarating in ways I hadn’t experienced in years, at that point, and even though we were quite different, our differences made us work. There weren’t those usual franco-anglo tensions and as much as I took delight in his expressions and ways of being, he genuinely seemed to like my own quirks. For the first time since Charlotte had passed, I felt like I was at the top of my game; the sex was good, the company better and with time, I did come to love him – a lot.”

 “It was exhilarating to be with a man and even more so with Nicholas. He was – alive. Intelligent and – oh, he was flirty to boot! I loved being with him. It was easy being with him, which is saying something considering the fact that he wasn’t necessarily out, but he didn’t exactly hide it either. It helped that his parents lived far and that he wasn’t particularly close to them. In a way, he was carefree and I loved that about him. He managed to make every shitty situation better; it was just the way he was – very positive about life. What was even greater still was that at least, this time around, there’d be no pregnancy scares – I didn’t have to worry about that and losing both him and a baby all over again. We could simply be and it felt like opportunities I had never experienced before. He made it feel as though this could be a long-term thing and that maybe, one day soon, same sex relationships could be accepted. That we could be fully out in public beyond the underground meet up places.”

 “That sounds quite euphoric,” Edward says, disbelief evident in his voice. The 1930s weren’t exactly the most forward thinking of times, but hearing Étienne go about this part of his tale, it almost sounds as if he’s talking of some far away future.

 “I know, but that was part of Nicholas’ charm. He made you think that anything was possible. It was like a magic power he had; even when the news was terrible, he’d manage to find something positive to focus on and get my mind off of it and I loved that about him. For the first time in what felt like a lifetime, I had a lover. We were together in ways I had never thought I’d want to be ever again and I loved him. Fully and truly and so did he. It felt wonderful and it felt like a dream. We were together for a few years and they were spectacular years. I honestly thoughts I had found the one and that I could spend the rest of his lifetime with him. That I could wake up next to him for many more years to come and I looked forward to that...” He trails off again and once more, Edward knows that this is the part of the story that shifts and goes from good to bad.

 Étienne takes a deep breath and sighs sadly.

 “And then came the stupid war.”

 There had been many people in Québec who hadn’t wanted to participate in the war effort. This wasn’t their conflict, but one happening across the ocean. They felt bad for the people who died, sure, but it wasn’t up to them to be cannon fodder. The divide and tensions had been mighty and if anything, it had only made Quebecers even angrier – more resentful.

 “Of course, Nicolas wanted to join. He was British. He felt compelled to help the motherland or whatever. I tried to dissuade him from it. I didn’t want him to die, and it wasn’t up to him to save the world. Others could do that great sacrifice. He could stay here, with me, where he’d be loved and looked after and where we could be – happy. At first, he resisted and I managed to keep him safe, but I could tell that it bothered him that he was here, when he could be out there fighting.”

 “D’you know what he did in the war?” Edward asks softly, out of genuine curiosity. The letters had never mentioned and he’d always wondered.

 “He flew those goddamned planes.” Étienne answers him with an annoyed sort of sigh.

 Edward nearly laughs and tries to disguise it as a cough, but his boyfriend notices and gives him a sharp look. “Sorry, sorry – it’s just ironic,” At the questioning look he receives, he goes on, “I wanted to join as well – to fly planes more than anything.” He twiddles his thumbs nervously and avoids looking at Étienne, as if afraid he’d get angry or that for some reason he’d be hurt by the admission.

 “You’ve got to be fucking kidding me. I’m certainly glad you didn’t – would’ve worried sick over you had I known.”

 He’s touched by Étienne’s comment and gives his hand another squeeze to help him calm down. Nothing had happened in the end. He’d chickened out, in a way. There would have been too much paperwork, he would have been away from home for too long of a stretch and it could have negatively impacted him. Then, there was obviously the fact that he couldn’t really die, which would have been a strange thing to explain during a war and too much of a headache to bother with. In the end, he’d stayed back and had found other ways to contribute.

 “Anyways; Nicolas waited out as long as he could, but in the end, he signed up regardless and promised to write as often as possible. I hated that I couldn’t be enough and keep him here where it was safe. It felt as though I was second best to some stupid war where the casualties kept climbing day after day and I came to resent him for it.”

 “I still remember the morning he left, clear as day. I hoped and prayed that as he headed out, he’d have a change of heart and come back to me, but after one last quick kiss behind the door, he left and never even looked back… It hurt. So much. I hadn’t cried that hard since Charlotte’s funeral. Still, I must have written to him every single day, hoping and praying that he was safe and sound – that he’d come back to me soon. We’d even decided to use Élyse as our middle-woman. It would be less strange for a “love-struck” woman to write to the front to her sweetheart, than for me to do the same. It worked, for a while. She’d get the letters and bring them over, and I would give her mine to mail out.”

 “Obviously, I didn’t hear from him as often, since he was on the front, but every letter I got from him was like a lifeline – assuring me that he was still alive. I heard horror stories back here, from wounded soldiers who returned and part of me wanted him to get hurt enough to be dispatched back home. Where I could take care of him. I wanted our old life back. I wanted its simplicity and I wanted to hold him close. I missed him, and every time they put up the list of new fallen soldiers, I checked, heart racing, hoping I wouldn’t see his name. When I didn’t, I would be relieved for a moment, until the anxiety would settle back it and I would worry until the next posting would be made.”

 “There were those few who were proud of their sons and men who’d gone off to fight – the proud widows who’d wear their grief as an honour badge, but I wanted none of that. I wanted a coward who had weaseled his way out of the war and who could stay with me. I didn’t want some war hero. I didn’t care about that.”

 He fidgets with his lighter, forcefully flicking it on and off with more force than necessary. Edward lets him and remains quiet, but keeps an eye on him in case Étienne was to accidentally set something on fire. Even Mercury looks up at him, concerned but Étienne ignores them both and takes a shaky breath to try and settle his nerves.

 “It would have been easier not to love him.” He says through gritted teeth. “It would have been easier to simply bed him and move on, but instead I went ahead and fell for him hard. The time we had together was too short and I hoped he’d come back to me – that we could resume our lives together.”

 “Of course, the universe had other plans. Of course, I wasn’t allowed to have any prolonged happiness. They went to my sister with the news, after they found the letters addressed to her in his bag. They assumed Élyse was his girlfriend and went to her with the news – telling her of the terrible accident – of the bravery the men in the plane had faced – of the great sacrifice they had done for our country. The usual bullshit they’d told so many others. There was no body found in the wreckage and so they pronounced him missing in action.”

 “The minute they were gone, she came to see me to tell me the news. The moment I saw her face – the moment I saw her walk up to my door, I knew she had news of Nicolas and that it wasn’t good. I think I would have preferred him to be dead for good, instead of the ugly false hope that lived in me for years after – that he might show up one day, out of the blue. Instead, I was stuck unable to mourn properly. There was no body to burry, no marker to go to, and no way for me to find closure. Until the war ended and every soldier was returned, I was left waiting and hoping. And even then. Years after, I was still looking for him. Sometimes, I’d think I’d hear his laugh. A person with similar hair would trick me into believing it was him. He was gone and yet, I saw his ghost everywhere.”

 Despite knowing all of this, Edward stills at the mention. He wonders how he would have reacted had he been in a similar situation and knows he would have been as much of a wreck as Étienne had.

  “On top of that, I couldn’t even find comfort or solace with his family. His parents didn’t know of us and neither did his other siblings. The only one I could turn to was Élyse and she did her best – really, but she wasn’t Nicolas, and what I wanted above all else was him.”

 “Eventually, years later, I bought a little spot at the cemetery and buried the last of his belongings that I had. I needed to put him to rest in my own way to move on. I still couldn’t cope and I needed to – do something. I took the clothes he had left at my place and the bag they had brought back to my sister and buried them in that little plot. There was no big fanfare about it and only a small headstone to mark the place, but it was some type of closure, even if the body wasn’t there.” Étienne tries not to draw parallels between Charlotte and Nicholas – of graves that have been more or less lost to time and that no one has visited in years. He knows where both are and has, on occasion, purposely passed by to reflect and commemorate. Time has done its due course and has healed some of his aches, yet there have still been times when he’s yearned for one more chance to see them again.

 Edward gives the necessary space to the words that Étienne has just said. He thinks about how unlucky his boyfriend has been in love, but keeps the comment to himself, convinced Étienne is properly aware. He’s buried his own fare share of friends he’d been close to; brothers and sisters lost in one way or another and he supposes that to a certain point, he can related. Yet knowing how close Étienne keeps his pains and how much he internalises everything, he wonders just how deep his wounds really run.

 “I asked Emma, later, to look into him – to use her contacts to see if she could find out anything. She told me there wasn’t anything else – what I knew was what was out there and I left it at that. Still, there were times when I felt as though she had found out more – some terrible truth, or maybe just something more emotionally painful. I didn’t pursue it. I didn’t want to re-open old wounds that had barely started to scab over. I chose to believe her that he’d died just like they’d said – he’d died in his plane and his body had been lost over the sea. The other possibilities were too painful to consider and I chose to remember our time together as one of love instead of having it tainted by something ugly.”

 “After Nicolas, I felt like I had been left to the side of the road to die. I felt empty – as if my heart had been ripped out of my ribcage. It was easier to return to the previous status-quo – to go on with everyday life and forget I had ever felt anything for them. Charlotte and Nicholas were gone and I was still here. That’s always been our curse – we can’t die and we don’t really change, while everyone else around us does. We notice them grow older until they’re gone and no matter how hard we try to remember, eventually even that’s taken away... But I’d get over it – with time. I’d had my fun and I had been reminded why I had found the whole thing pointless. Why it was best to stay away from love.”

 Edward agrees to a point. It is hard, certainly, but in his opinion, there is also beauty in love and in falling in love. He knows Étienne means it from a point of hurt, so he keeps the thought to himself and listens on.

--

Part II

Part IV

[buckyscrystalqueen]

Fresh Start: Part 3

Pairings: Bucky x Reader, Cop!Bucky x Reader

Warnings: Swearing.

Word Count: 4,168

A/N: Got the idea for this one while watching ‘The Town’.

Part 1 / Part 2

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

You walked into court for the second time from a heavily guarded back room, ten times more terrified than the last time. This time, you had large, dark sunglasses on your face in a vane attempt to cover the bruise and patched up cuts on the right side of your face and a scarf over your head to cover what the sunglasses couldn’t. You knew you wouldn’t be able to keep them on in the court room, but you were still going to hold as much of your dignity as you could.

“Ms. Odinson. How are you today?” Nick Fury, who had been Thor… and at one point, your lawyer, asked after you had been sworn in again.

“I’m fine.” You said with a nod over the judge asking you to remove your glasses and scarf. You took a deep breath and kept your eyes strictly on Tony this time as a woman in the jury box gasped at the sight of your cheek. You could almost see your brother’s smirk out of the corner of your eye as he sat back in his chair, causing the chains of the shackles he was being forced to wear for attacking you to rattle. So you simply sat up a little straighter and looked up at Nick.

“I just have a few questions for you today.” Nick started in as he purposely moved directly between you and Tony to mess with your mind. “What time did Jack show up at your place for dinner?”

“It wasn’t my place.” You said with a shake of your head. “I lived in a small apartment with no real kitchen at that time in my life. We were at my broth’a’s house. I serve supp’a at 6:30 every Sunday. I would say he arrived five minutes before that.”

“And what time did my client allegedly shoot one of his dearest friends?”

“I didn’t look at a clock, suh… but I would guess it would have been about seven…”

“What else did you talk about that night?” He asked quickly. “Besides the alleged bank robberies you claimed he orchestrated and the supposed drug deals. What did you talk about?” You startled the slightest bit and actually looked over your brother since you had never been asked that question before.

“Well it started with my sauce recipe. See, I use ground sausage in the sauce when I cook it and then more sausage in the lasagne. Can’t use too much extra seasonings either; get enough of it in the sausage. It’s all about practice and timing…”

“What else?” Fury asked, almost cutting you off in an attempt to trip you up.

“Well, we talked about a painting that I had put up over the stove. Ain’t nothing special. It was just something I found at a thrift store for a nickel. He told me his sister painted and I asked…”

“What else?” Fury interrupted again. You huffed but took a deep breath immediately after, not appreciating the way this man was speaking to you but knowing he was doing just to get you riled up.

“That’s all.” You said shortly as you wrapped your scarf around your hand. “Thor got aggravated and started talking business so I shut up.”

“When you originally spoke to the police.” Fury said as he walked back over to his table to grab your original statement. “You told them that Jack stayed for dinner, and after dinner, you cleaned up, and went home. Is that right?”

“That is what I said, yes. But…”

“You also said the last time we saw you that you supposedly lied out of fear, correct?”

“Rightfully so.” You said as you gestured to your face.

“Your honor, can you instruct the witness to answer yes or no only, please?” You took another deep breath as the judge repeated the instructions to you. You looked straight forward and found Bucky, who had slipped into the back of the gallery. He gave you a short nod and pulled his leather jacket to the side to show a screen printed black shirt with Jessica’s photo on it, making a small smile pull at the corner of your lips. 

“Yes.” You said to the repeated question as you looked back over at Nick.

“Were you arrested in 2013 for possession of narcotics?”

“Objection!”

“Goes to character.” Fury said as he pretended to study the papers in his hand as if they were the most important documents in the history of the world.

“Overruled.” The judge sighed.

“Yes, I was.” You said with a nod as you finally glanced at your brother, who looked so smug it was almost disgusting. It was the look he used to give you when he knew he was winning at any games you played.

“And you plead not guilty?”

“Correct.”

“So you lied again there, correct?” You felt your teeth grind together as you tightened your grip on your scarf.

“Situationally…”

“Your honor!”

“Yes!” You said a little loudly before swallowing your aggravation down. You looked away from him and looked at the small glimpse of Jessica’s face that you could see. “Yes, I lied.”

“So, why should we believe that you’re not lying here today?” He asked a little loudly as he dropped the papers on the table.

“Because you have to believe that people are capable of changing for the ones they love.” You looked over at him with zero emotion on your face but your eyes continued on to your brother and you shook your head. “Because you have to believe that at the end of the day, I am just a moth’a that would do anything for her daught’a’s safety. And if that means I have to turn my back on my broth’a because he is a dang’a to her well being, and he is asking me be a dang’a to her well being as well, I will. I am doing this for Jessica. Not because I don’t love my broth’a. But because I love my daught’a more.” You looked back up at Fury before turning to look straight forward at the photo once more. It took Fury a second before he shook his head.

“I’ve got nothing more.” He said as he sat down.

“Cross.” Tony said quickly as he shot up from his chair. You looked over at him as he moved just to the edge of the table. “Ms. Odinson, did you or did you not see the defendant shoot Jack?”

“I did.” You said with a nod.

“And did you, or did you not originally lie about it under your brother’s instruction?”

“I did.”

“Last one. Did you or did you not decide on your own that coming clean about what you saw was the right thing to do no matter what the consequences could have been?”

“I did.” You stated one final time.

“Thank you, (Y/N). That’s all I have for you today.”

“You may go, Ms. Odinson.” The judge said quietly. You nodded your head and looked over at your brother for the last time before quickly putting your sunglasses back on. You walked out of the witness box, and disappeared through the side door where there were two Marshalls waiting for you to take you back to the WITSEC holding center so you could get ready for your new life.

——

“This is a house.” You said a little slowly as you worked hard on turning your Boston accent into a slightly New York/ slightly accent less sounding one, much to your displeasure.

“This is our house.” Bucky said as he pulled your new to you Hyundai Santa Fe into the driveway of a three bedroom, three bathroom Las Vegas, Nevada home. “New house for the new (Y/L/N) family.”

“I’ve ne-ver lived in’a house before.” You said as you leaned forward to look at the fake grass covered front yard. “This isn’t real.” You said as you sat back and looked at your fiancé with your eyebrows raised. “No, you’re just teasin’ me.”

“I’m really not.” He chuckled as he pulled into the two car garage and shut off the engine.

“James.”

“(Y/N).” He said with a smile as he put the car in park and turned off the engine. He looked over at you and gestured vaguely with his hand. “Go on. Go Townie…”

“This is faackin’ ridiculous!” You nearly screeched in the accent you been hiding for weeks as he sat in the car, and waited for you to get it out. “Ain’t no one in the Town lives this nice. Like we’re damn royals ‘er some shit. You know, houses like this means ya got shit ta rob. I’d’a robbed a house like this.”

“Well it’s a good thing you threatened to cut off someone’s dick so we could keep Dakota then.” He said with a nod as he looked back at the dog that was laying across the back seat, fast asleep. 

“Even still. Catch chaages ‘ere, boy, I tell ya. This bitch… this bitch’s ours? No shit?”

“No shit.” Bucky laughed.

“Babe. Baaaabe. Stop.”

“Do you even wanna see inside?” He asked as he gestured to the door leading into the house. “You picked out all that furniture last week, you gotta have somewhere to put it…”

“Oh moth’a fuckin’ right I’mma go inside. Tha’s my moth’a fuckin’ house. Gotta find places for the damn guns!”

“You can take the girl outta the Town.” He chuckled behind you as you let Dakota out of the back while he got a still waking up Jessie out of her car seat.

“Ooo, no more quarters!” You said as you pointed to the washer and dryer in the little laundry room. “No more scrubs chattin’ me up at the mat.”

“I love how it’s always the little things with you.” He teased as he followed you into the kitchen while Dakota ran into the house to investigate and make sure everything was OK.

“Bucky!” You hissed as you dead stopped in front of him, nearly forcing him to run into you as you turned around and whacked his arm. “A dishwash’a!”

“And counter space for me to cook.” He said as he gestured with his elbow to the white marble countertops that ran the length of three of the four walls of the medium kitchen except for the places left open for new appliances the WITSEC people would be helping you finance until you both found jobs. 

“Yea, cause we all know I cain’t cook for shit.” You said as you looked in the small pantry built into the fourth wall beside the door to the laundry room. You turned to look at the massive living room (that had very questionable grey tile like the entire first floor) and stopped again at the sight of water. “Wait. That ain’t what I think it is.”

“I don’t know what you think it is.” Your fiancé said with a smile as he put the diaper bag on the counter and moved Jess to his other hip. “So you might as well go look for yourself.” You shot him a glare over your shoulder as you walked quickly across the room toward a sliding glass door that had a cage like screen door fitted over it.

“Fuck off.” You said as you stepped out into your decent sized, walled in back yard, and looked at the pool with a cute little rock waterfall in the deep end to your right that actually belonged to you. “This is a dream.”

“Here, why don’t you take Jessica.” Bucky said as the movers rang the door bell to drop off the boxes of the belongings you brought from Boston and all of the new furniture you had picked out for your house. “And see how she feels about being in a swimming pool. I’ll help the movers out. That way you don’t have to practice New York in your excitement.”

“James.” You whispered as you took your suddenly super talkative daughter from your fiancé with a smile and a hint of tears. “Thank you. I never would have done this without you.”

“Anything for the woman I love and our little girl.” He said softly as he gave you a chaste kiss. “Please don’t be naked when I come back out here.”

“That ain’t happening.” You replied honestly as you kicked off your flip flops and walked over to the shallow, beach entry. “You ain’t never been in a pool before, Jessie. This’ll be fun for you. And you are gunna have to get naked just like Mommy…”

“I heard that!” Bucky said over Jessie’s babbles and the few miscellaneous words she knew as he pushed the sliding glass doors open all the way for the grill, and the small fire pit and couple rocking chairs you just had to have.

“Nak-ee baby!” You said as New Yorker as possible as you pulled off the dress you had on your daughter, and tossed it to the side. “Nak-ee Mommy!”

“Mama! Ball!”

“Don’t you do it!” He chuckled as you stepped out of your jeans, choosing to placate him by leaving your thong on.

“Tan lines.” You said with a glare at him as you sat down on the edge to take off your shirt, which caused one of the younger movers to put down your rocking chair roughly and bee line it back into the house.

“Modesty.” He said as he watched you stand up and pull the strap of your panties up a bit on your hips to slightly cover the ‘Boston Strong’ Massachusetts state shaped tattoo on your hip, which according to your new “official” life story was a memorial to your dead mother who was born and raised in Boston and the location of your birth and the first couple years of your life before you “moved to New York”. You hated that it no longer could stand for your love of your hometown. “Damn, baby. The things I would do to you…”

“That’s how we got this one.” You said as you walked out into the sun warmed water. “Want another?”

“Oh, hell yea.” He said as he turned away to help direct the movers with your belongings.

“Yea, Daddy’s crazy if he thinks I’m puttin’ this body through another baby. You were bad enough on me, you little punkin’. Weren’t you?” You smiled at your baby girl infectious laugh as you carefully walked down the two steps to lower you both into the three feet of water. “What’s that?” You asked playfully as you took a couple steps away from the shelf so she could start to figure out the concept of the pool. “We swimming? It’s like a giant bathtub.” You pulled off her diaper since it swelled nearly instantly and stuck it on the side of the pool as you continued to slowly walk deeper into the pool.

“We never had a swimmin’ pool growing up.” You said at nearly a whisper as you moved to stand just in the shade created by the long pergola so your daughter didn’t get burned with this much stronger sun and so that you could watch the guys moving things into your new home. “That ain’t true. When we were kids, your grand pop bought a plastic above ground pool. Just a round circle with a cheap as fuck ladder. We had it for a whole week until your uncle busted the side open with his skateboard. Faackin’ idiot.” Jess laughed as you pat your hand on the water. 

“Yea, baby girl. Us Townies ain’t never seen nothin’ this nice, though. Had ta have money for them in ground fucks. But you, my little meatball, get a beautiful pool in a nice, safe neighborhood. You don’t gotta worry ‘bout walking down to the spa for groceries. Ain’t gotta worry ‘bout the crazies or drugs or bank robberies every other day. None of it. And you know why? Because you, little girl, have the best damn daddy in the whole damn world.”

“Dada.” 

“Yea, Dada.” You said with a nod as you cupped some water in your hand and poured it over the back of her head to keep her cool. “He’s a wicked good man, baby girl. Way better than your Ma deserves.”

“Baf.” Jess said as she tried, unsuccessfully to get water in her little hands to put on her head to ‘help’, only succeeding in splashing you both with water.

“Sure, punkin’. This can be your bath.” You giggled as you sunk down in the water a little more. “We’ll stay out here all day for your bath while the boys do the hard work inside. How about that?” Jessie simply giggled and splashed more water on both of you, trying to give herself a bath like you did every night. “God, you’re such a meatball” You laughed as you helped her put more water on her head like she apparently wanted. “You are so my kid.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“So I think we should redo this back yard.” Bucky said as he looked out the far set of sliding glass doors, which lead to the other side of your back yard. “I don’t like that metal fence separating the pool. Bars are too far apart. She could just slip right through…”

“Babe, we just fuckin’ moved in.” You sighed as you unloaded boxes of toys into baskets along the back wall beside the new, very comfortable, grey, ‘u’ shaped couch while keeping an eye on Jessica as she pulled the toys right back out of the baskets and scattered them across the floor in what you were temporarily deeming as ‘her spot’. “Can you maybe finish setting up the TV first?”

“That’d be easy to rip out. Same with this dumb brick.” He said more to himself as he gestured vaguely in that direction. “Grass this whole area in with that fake grass shit…”

“Bucky.” You said in a sing song voice as you broke down the empty box and added it to the growing pile by the front door so you could go put all the toys back into their baskets again. “TV, please.”

“Little swing set for Jess. This live oak is nice for shade… hammock between those two palms…

“James! Put my damn TV together so your kid can stop ripping apart my living room!” Your fiancé turned around with a huff and a smirk as he watched Jess grab the toy you had literally just put away and throw it on the pink, flower carpet with a laugh.

“OK!” He said as he raised his hands in surrender. “TV.”

“Why you gotta be a damn pain in my ass?” You asked both him and Jessica as you scooped her up, grabbed the toy from her hand, and put it back in the basket. “What’r you doin’, punk, huh? You just pissin off your Ma just ‘cause you can?” You blew a loud raspberry on her cheek and pretended to drop her by moving her to straddle your stomach, holding her head and body to your chest, and dipping both of you down toward the ground. She squealed loudly and took off running when you put her down, making Dakota jump up from where he was watching near the half bathroom to follow her.

“How long have you had him?” Bucky asked as you walked over and started to push a box of his books toward the entertainment center he was setting the TV up on.

“Who, Dakota?” You asked as you pulled open the box. “‘Bout two months after Thor got locked up. Couple days after I found out I was pregnant. I just wanted to know that my kid was safe. So I bought the most vicious looking puppy I could find and had a guy from the block teach me how to train him to be a guard dog that was good with kids. And damn did I get a good one. He’s taken a beating from Jess. She climbs all over him, she’ll even just lay on him and yell at me about bed time right by his ear and he just takes it. She’s his baby.” Bucky nodded his head slowly as he hooked up the cable box that the cable company had dropped off that morning.

“I tried finding you.” He said as you walked over to grab your box of DVD’s. “After, I mean. I tried so damn hard. It was about six months after. I went back to your old apartment but the lady next door said you’d just left one night. She’d no idea where you went…”

“I moved into one of Thor’s places.” You sighed. “Rent was paid up for a whole year, bills were all paid for with money he kept stashed there. It wasn’t even a debate in my head. I cleaned out my cash stash, moved out, and sold all my furniture to some guy few blocks over who was moving in to the section 8 housing for wicked cheap. Got rid of my main car to pay for Jessie’s doctor visits.”

“That’s why I couldn’t find anything in your name.” He said, sadly as you both turned around to look at your daughter as she rattled the baby gate that prevented her from going upstairs. “Jessica!” Your daughter whipped around so quickly she stumbled and landed on her butt. “Leave it alone. No.” Her bottom lip trembled for only a moment before Dakota came over to give her a kiss and nudge her until she stood up again to keep playing.

“I know you didn’t want to leave.” You said softly as you watched Jess put her butt in the air to get her feet under her before grabbing on to her four legged best friend so she didn’t topple over. “I’d like to think I knew you well enough to know that. But we both have to accept that our… relationship is wicked fuckin’ complicated. I have to accept that I don’t know what’s true and what was a lie about what you told me about yourself. And you have to accept that me and your daughter were unfortunately collateral damage because of your job. It sucks, we both hate it. 

But we are also here together; just you and me. Not that I mind that at all because have you seen you naked? And have you cried on your shoulder? And for fucks sake, have you ever, ever met another poor fuck that can sit and listen to me for any fucking stretch of time? Do you think anyone else can put up with sleeping with me? No, because you’re the fucking saint to my satan. But you need to remember something. We are actually, legally new people here. I’m a fucking secretary for fucks sake. And you’re a fucking mechanic. So now, we get to develop those people together. Like… I think, I spent a spring break in Miami Beach and I was on some spring break pool party music video show on MTV. And you could be an army vet…”

“I am an army vet.” He interrupted.

“Then you can still be an army vet, jerk face.” You laughed as you gently pushed his shoulder. “Are you even hearing what I’m saying or is New James a shit listener?”

“I hear you.” He chuckled as he grabbed your wrist and pulled you over to him. “I hate that you’re the rational one of us and I’m the emotional one.”

“That’s what you get when you’re raised on the streets of Charlestown. Rationality.” You both looked over at a single bark, a large bang, and Jessica’s sudden scream cry, and you had no idea which one of you ran into the kitchen faster to get to her. She had somehow managed to pull the oven open, and it must have knocked her down when gravity took over.

“Oh, my poor baby.” Bucky cooed as he picked her up.

“Oh, she’s fine.” You said as you shut the oven with your heel and pointed at him. “Shoulda had the TV set up. She’d be watching Mickey Mouse right now.”

“You know what… fuck you.” He laughed as he cuddled his daughter closer. “Go be rational somewhere else.”

“I’m tellin’ you now, that baby may not be raised in the Town but she sure as fuck ain’t gunna be no pussy ass bitch baby, you hear me?” You called out as you grabbed the next DVD box. “She’s got Townie blood…”

“She’s got sweet New York blood, too.” He said as grabbed the two remotes and sat down with his little love to coddle her. “Tell your Mommy that you’re going to be a sweet little angel, aren’t you.”

“Oh, God help us all!” You groaned playfully as you unloaded the next box while Bucky set up the TV and cable under the watchful eyes of Jessie and Dakota.

Part 4

[nickelkeep]

What We’re in For

Pairing: Dean/Cas Rating: Mature Word Count: 5.2K Warnings: Minor Character Death Written For: nickel’s storytime, part 4 of the Runaway Series On Ao3

Dean anxiously paced back and forth in Bobby's study. He was on the phone, and while Bobby was making some noises of approval, he couldn't get a read on the Old Man.

"Sit down." Sam hissed, pointing at one of the chairs by the window. "You're making me nervous."

"I'm making you nervous? Our old man is hunting down an innocent pack, you know, the one that has a member that I accidentally bonded with? How do you think I feel?" Dean snapped before listening to his brother's advice and sitting down.

Bobby set his phone down on his desk. "You both can knock it off." He pointed at the free seat next to Dean. "You sit down too, Sam. I need your head in the game as much as Dean's."

"What did you find out?" Dean reached for the whiskey Bobby kept on the table between the two chairs, only to have his hand slapped at by Sam. "Bitch."

"Jerk."

"And I said enough." Bobby huffed out before covering his face with his hand. He let out a sigh and dragged his hand down. "Looks like an old hunting colleague of ours got himself into a position of power out in Illinois. Name's Kubrick. He took John's application and approved it with little fanfare."

"Sounds like there's more to it." Sam leaned forward, resting his elbow on his knees. "Something fishy?"

"You two remember Annie Hawkins, right?" Bobby waited until Sam and Dean acknowledged him. "Well, I had her look into it. The patron for the license is listed as one Amanda Tapping. However–" Bobby picked his phone back up and turned it to the brothers. "The lady on the left is Amanda Tapping. The lady on the right is the one who claims to be Amanda Tapping."

"Is this Ms. Tapping a family member of one of the people the wendigo got?" Dean asked.

"Nailed it in one." Bobby nodded. "However, thanks to Annie being as good as she is, she found out that this lady on the right here is a woman by the name of Naomi Novak."

Dean sat up straighter in his chair. "Novak? Like Clan Novak." He looked at Sam. "Gabriel mentioned a Naomi."

"Who is she?"

"I'm not sure, Sam. I'm thinking she's their former Pack Leader. Gabe mentioned something about how 'female pack leaders are normally cold, like Naomi,' when we were talking about Maddie in the hospital." Dean ruffled his hair. "Maybe she is, and she was ousted. And now she's trying to get revenge on her clan?" Dean reached into his pocket and pulled out his phone.

"Calling your wolf?" Bobby sat on the corner of his desk.

"If his old Pack Leader is coming after him, I should probably warn him." He let out a heavy sigh. "Come on, Cas. Pick up." The phone went to voice mail, and Dean hung up before trying to call again.

"Dean?"

Dean hushed at Sam and waited until the phone went to voicemail again. "Shit." He jumped up from his seat and pointed at his younger brother. "Go find Maddie, protect her and her Pack. Bobby, can you get other witches or hunters to Garth and Kate's packs, please?"

He was out the door and behind his Baby's steering wheel in a matter of seconds. Cas simply did not not answer his phone. He'd pick up, say he was busy, and that he'd call back. Something about being polite and punctual. As he sped down the road to the Homestead, Dean tried two more times to call Cas, both going straight to voicemail. He hoped that it only meant that Cas was down in the bunker, and there was no signal for his call to get through.

Once he pulled up in front of the farmhouse, Dean quickly shifted Baby into park and hopped out. He didn't see any of Clan Novak's Weres out and about working, and his anxiety began to skyrocket. Dean ran up to the house and banged on the front door. When no one answered, he tried the knob and let himself in. As Dean looked around, he realized that he had come across the scene of a house left in a hurry.

"CAS?" Dean cried out, running around the house. He searched each floor quickly, pushing open bedroom doors and looking for any Weres that may have hidden. Both satisfied and unsatisfied that there was no one left in the house, Dean made his way outside and started running towards the silo.

Before he made it halfway, a single solitary gunshot rang through the air. "CAS!" Dean cried out. He paused for all of a moment listening for the echo of the shot to fade before determining the location of the shooter. Dean broke out into a sprint, making his way towards the woods on the far side of the house.

…

"Well, I knew I was right in hiding out in these woods. Breaking one or two of your wards was sure to send one of you running out here to check it." Cas fought down a growl as the man standing in front of him aimed the gun at his Aunt Amara. "Didn't think I'd be lucky enough to have a two-for-one special. Granted, I won't leave until I've killed every single one of your Pack members. That's what this nice little permit here entitles me to."

"You were able to procure a permit to kill us?" Amara's voice rang steady, helping to calm and center Cas. "I'm not sure how you achieved that legally, considering we were proven innocent."

"Then why were you so afraid?" The man took another step closer and switched his aim to Cas as Cas started to move between the two of them. "Back up, Mutt. I've been hunting with this my whole life. I'll get you and still get her before she can shift."

"Aunt Amara, if I tackle him, you can run. Please," Cas pleaded. "The Pack needs you."

"Hush, sweet Pup," Amara reached over and ran her fingers through the fur at Cas' nape. "It will all be okay."

"Like hell, it will." The man used the rifle to prod and nudge Amara, causing the distance to grow between her and Cas. "Maybe I should line you two up, no point in sparing a bullet on both of you. It would just be a waste." The hunter lifted the gun, aiming it Cas. "Sorry, Mutt, nothing personal. Just hate creatures, and the money made it so worth it."

Before he could pull the trigger, a bright streak of silver came out behind the man, biting at his arm and trying to knock the rifle free.

"You stupid beast!" The man whipped his arm back and the shirt tore away, revealing a Kevlar arm guard. "You think you're my first creature to hunt?" Before the wolf could get back to its feet, the man delivered a swift and strong kick to the wolf's ribs, sending it tumbling against the ground. "Well, you've got the honors of being the first of your pack to die, friend."

"Inias!" Amara cried out, as Cas howled and started to charge at the hunter.

A loud, solitary gunshot stopped Cas in his tracks, and the hunter turned around, racking his rifle for another shot. Cas growled and prepared to pounce on the man when Amara jumped onto him. "No, Castiel. No!"

"You think you're going to get off the hook? I've got enough silver bullets for over two hundred wolves." The man smirked. "And as far as I'm concerned, there's no one out here to hear–"

"ABI!"

The man flew across the glade and slammed into a tree. He hit with a sick thunk and slid down, collapsing at the trunk. Both Cas and Amara looked to the source of the spell, and Cas' heart started pounding rapidly at the sight of Dean, panting, resting his hands on his legs.

"Inias!" Amara wailed, scrambling to her feet, tripping as she made her way to the silver wolf. Cas watched as Dean ran next to her, and he quickly followed, using his nuzzle to move Amara out of the way. Through their bond, Cas felt as Dean's heart sank, and he instantly knew that his pack member, one of his closest kin growing up, was gone.

"Hold on for me, please." Dean started pushing magic into Inias. "Please, your pack needs you, Inias."

Cas whimpered and nuzzled against Dean. While he knew that Dean could understand what he was saying, he hoped the message was clear.

"I'm sorry, Cas. I'm sorry I wasn't fast enough." Dean got to his feet and helped Amara to her feet. He bent back down and picked up Inais' body, cradling it carefully. "Show us where to go, Cas. I need to get you two to safety before John wakes up."

Cas focused his nuzzling on Amara's hand. "You heard him, Aunt Amara. We need to go."

"I know, sweet Pup." Amara wiped at her face and fell in line behind Cas, with Dean bringing up the rear.

…

Dean stood at the rear of the room, closest to the door. It felt wrong to be there, he felt like an intruder on the Pack's grief. Sure, he had gotten to know Inias over the past couple of weeks, and he mourned for the loss of a pack member beloved to Cas, but this wasn't his place.

So he stood a silent vigil in the back. While it was unlikely John would figure out how to get in the bunker, he wouldn't let anymore harm come to Clan Novak. Dean watched as Cas held his Aunt Amara, and briefly remembered that Inias was his cousin. Was Amara Inias' mother?

As Amara sunk to the floor crying, Dean felt Cas' pain and guilt wash over him. He knew that Cas took his position of Den Protector seriously. The fact that Inias died, coming to rescue him and Amara had to weigh on Cas's shoulders. Unable to cross the room to comfort Cas, Dean thought about their bond for a moment. If he could feel Cas' emotions, could Cas feel his?

Dean started small, pushing through what he hoped was a feeling of comfort. He closed his eyes and imagined pulling Cas into a warm, comforting embrace. Dean opened his eyes and found Cas whipping his head up, their eyes locking instantly. Cas' head tilted to the side and Dean inhaled sharply, knowing that Cas had felt it.

Yet, as quick as Dean had made use of their bond, Cas quickly closed it off. Unsure of what Cas meant by his actions, Dean nodded and turned towards the door, exiting the room. He quickly found the stairs and made his up, pulling his phone out of his pocket. Once Dean had a signal, he promptly swiped through his phone, pulling up Sam's number.

"Dean, how are things going over there?" Sam answered after the second ring.

"Sam. He got one. The Old Man got Inias." Dean wiped his hand over his mouth and hung his head. "I was too late getting here."

"You got there as fast as you could, Dean." Sam calmly replied, a valiant attempt at trying to comfort Dean. "I'm sure you saved a lot more of them by calling and getting Cas moving."

"Not enough, Sam." Dean leaned back against the wall and slid down it, sitting in the stair landing. "What's going on outside of here?"

"I'm not completely sure myself. I'm with Maddie's Pack, we're all in their safehouse. Bobby went to Kate's Pack, a couple of their members are out of town, but they called them to keep them out of town for an extra day or two. Rufus is with Garth's Pack, and they're all accounted for."

Dean let out a sigh of relief. "Glad to hear the old man's not had a chance to sow grief and chaos in the other packs."

"Well, it gets better. I was talking to Bobby before I called you. Annie was able to get John's permit revoked."

"Seriously?" Dean perked up and briefly contemplated running out of the bunker to help with any kind of manhunt.

"Seriously. Annie presented the evidence to the rest of the council that that Kubrick guy is on. They were apparently already pissed with Kubrick approving the permit without consulting with the rest of the group. Add on the fact that the evidence was clearly pointing to a Wendigo, not a Were or a pack."

"Cool, so state the obvious, obvious is recognized. Now we go after the bastard." The sound of steps on metal caused Dean to look down the stairs. "Since the permit is considered Null and Void, will that make what John did..."

Sam's side of the call remained quiet, and Dean pulled the phone away from his ear to make sure the call didn't drop. "...illegal kill. That's murder, Dean."

"Good." Dean closed his eyes and rested his head back against the wall. So we've already got people going after him?"

"Pretty much. Jody and Donna have already put out an APB, and I know they're personally on the move as well. John hurt a lot of people when he went dark side, Dean." Sam sighed.

"I think they're asking for assistance from the rest of the cryptid community. Specifically, the ones without weakness to silver, like Charlie and Ash, among others."

"As long as they're careful, the more, the merrier." Dean pushed himself back up to his feet. "I'm going to let the Pack know I'm heading out. Having a witch or two could be beneficial to the manhunt as well."

"I mean, don't let me stop you, Dean, but maybe you should stay in place. Cas and his Pack need you right now."

As though summoned, Cas appeared, looking up the stairs. Dean frowned. "I'll let you know, Sam. Keep me informed." Dean hung up the phone and looked at it in his palm. "Hiya, Cas."

"Hello, Dean." An awkward silence fell between them briefly, before Cas spoke up. "You're leaving?"

"I'm just getting in the way here, and if I'm out there, I can bring my father in. They revoked the permit, which means that killing Inias was illegal." Dean cringed at how he said that. "There's no way I can fix that, can I?"

Cas walked up the few steps between them. "I know what you meant, Dean. I know that hunters have their place in this world, we all do. And we know that some people are just evil." Cas hesitantly rested his hand on the side of Dean's neck.

"Cas, I'm sorry I wasn't here fast enough. I should have come right here, I should have..." Dean silenced as Cas placed a finger on his lips.

"There's nothing you could have done, Dean. I, nor the rest of the Pack, blame you." Cas removed his finger. "Inias wouldn't have let anything happen to our Aunt Amara."

"So you don't hate me?"

Cas stood up straight, the surprise evident on his face. "Why would I hate you?"

"When I tried to reach out to you through the bond?" Dean felt the blush rise on his cheeks and focused on the pattern in the steps.

Cas let out a sad chuckle. "You surprised me." Cas brought his other hand to rest on the other side of Dean's neck and pulled him in for a soft, sweet kiss. "You came to save us, Dean. You protected me and Amara."

"I had to, Cas." Dean rested his forehead against Cas'. "I heard that gunshot, and I froze."

Cas nodded slightly before dropping his hand to take Dean's. "Amara and Gabe want to talk to you. And I promise, they're not mad, they just have a lot of questions."

"I would if I were in their shoes too." Dean shook his head and smiled sadly at Cas. "Lead the way?"

…

To say that the warm feeling that Dean had pushed through their bond had been a surprise was an understatement. It had left Cas in shock, and he needed to slam down any mental barriers to keep himself composed. Cas wanted nothing more to experience the bond, to feel it and feed it and nurture it, but it didn't feel right to do so while standing next to Inias.

Inias, who wouldn't get to find out if Hayden, from Kate's Pack, returned any interest. Inias, who had lost his mother early, and was raised by Amara. Inias, who had grown up with Castiel, side by side.

Cas felt bad slamming Dean out, but at that moment, he couldn't handle two overwhelming emotions at once.

When Amara pulled him aside and asked him to go get Dean, he almost refused. Not because he didn't want to see Dean, but because it made him feel worse about being the one to live, and not Inias. However, knowing that Amara would be disappointed in him, he started the search for Dean, quickly finding him sitting on the stairs.

Once back with Amara and Gabe, the main thing on Cas' mind was the brief, but sweet, kiss the two had shared, and how he initiated it. Cas knew he should be listening to Dean explain about John, but he couldn't focus on the words coming out of Dean's moving lips.

"Castiel?" Amara asked, her eyebrow raised in interest. "Dean was telling us about his father. Did you catch any of it?"

"It's okay, Amara. Cas and I can talk about it at another time. You said you had other questions?" Dean took Cas' hand and gently squeezed it.

"If this question is too personal, I understand, but I have this need to know, much like Castiel, I'm sure." She paused and looked at Cas before looking back to Dean. "Are you a natural-born witch?"

"Yes, ma'am." Dean nodded.

"Your mother, I'm assuming."

Dean looked at Cas and nodded again. "Yeah. She was natural-born, as was her mother, and then there's magic woven throughout all of those branches. My brother and I can trace magic back so far in our line that we can go back to the beginning of written history." He turned to look at back at Amara, and Cas focused on her as well.

"That explains a lot." Amara smiled softly and rested her hand on Dean's shoulder. Cas tilted his head and felt anger build up inside of him. "Anna told me that she tried to tell you the significance of Castiel's fur?"

"She had mentioned something about Cas not being able to bond if he didn't want it. And then she had offered to let me in on a secret about his fur." The surprise must have shown on Cas' face, as Dean immediately apologized. "Sorry, Cas. It wasn't something I exactly asked to know."

"I'm not mad at you, Dean. I'm more surprised that she thinks it's okay to share Were Trade secrets."

"To be fair, she was using it to keep me from fighting our bond." Dean rubbed the back of his neck.

Cas felt his eyes go wide. "You wanted to fight the bond?"

"At the very beginning, yes, Cas." Dean turned to face Cas and grabbed his other hand. "You know how guilty I feel that I took your choice away from you."

"While it's commendable, and it does make me fonder of you, Dean, that's not something you would have had to worry about," Amara commented. She pulled their attention back to her. "Tell me, have you heard of the term 'Noćnivuk?'"

Cas let out a heavy sigh, knowing the lesson that Dean was about to receive.

"Can't say that I have," Dean replied.

"As a Cryptid nurse, I'm sure you're aware that all Werewolves have dormant magic. It's what we draw on to shift, what we use for our healing factor. It's what makes us who we are."

"I'm aware of that, yes."

"Noćnivuk or 'Night Wolves' are the wolves whose magic doesn't lay dormant, and can be drawn upon for other things." Amara smiled at Cas, and he let out another heavy sigh. "In our clan, if you have black fur, you're all but guaranteed to be a Noćnivuk."

"Dude, you can use magic?" Dean looked at Cas in awe.

Cas shook his head. "While I can, it's not what one would ever compare to a witch level of skill and training."

"You selling yourself short, Cas?"

"He's not exactly wrong, Dean. Castiel's magic is not like yours, but special in its own way." Amara clarified. "It's why he's our Den Protector."

"Part of why." Cas let go of Dean's hands and crossed his arms over his chest. "I'm like a focus, for the Pack. They can - for lack of a better word - leech magic off of me when they're about to run out."

"So, like a conduit?" Dean offered.

"That's actually a pretty good comparison, Dean." Gabe finally spoke up after sitting quietly for a while. "It might also be one of the reasons why I give you a rough time. You see, Noćnivuk reach out for other magic users. Their power calls out for power. You can't give power if you don't have it or take it from somewhere."

"So, Cas can pull from my magic when we're together?" Dean rubbed the back of his neck. "I don't understand what that has to do with our bond."

"Your magic is incredibly strong, Dean. I can feel it calling out to Castiel like Castiel's is calling to you. Even if you never healed him, the bond would have formed naturally. What you two have between you is profound and rare." Amara smiled at Cas, who looked down at his feet in response. "If you don't mind, Dean, Gabriel wanted to talk to you more about your father. There are some words I need to have with my nephew."

Dean cupped Cas' cheek before exiting the room behind Gabe. The small gesture sent a warm feeling through Cas' chest.

"Castiel?"

"Yes, Aunt Amara?" Cas looked up from the floor.

She tapped the side of her nose. "You're nervous."

"Dean was worried all this time about forcing the bond on me, and here I am, and I would have forced a bond on him eventually." Cas walked over and sat next to Amara.

"Castiel. Do you regret how much you've come to know Dean? How much you've let this grow between you?"

"Of course not. Dean has given me a choice every step of the way. But I can't help but feel like this is spiraling so quickly. We're moving at the speed of light when we both said we wanted to go slow." Cas rested his head in his hands, pressing the heels of his palms into his eyes.

"The bond of a Noćnivuk and their partner is life long, sweet pup. The creation of the bond is rough, and it hurts, and there are growing pains. But at the same time, it is swift, it is sweet, and it is thorough." Amara gently rubbed Cas' back. "In the case of you and Dean, when he opened his bond to heal you, I doubt he knew that he was inviting your magic in."

"Great. So I basically locked Dean into a bond while I was sleeping." Cas scoffed. "He's going to hate me."

"Doubtful, Castiel. And as I mentioned before, you two would have drifted towards each other anyway. Certain magics call out to one another. Would it be as swift and quick like it has been?" Amara shook her head. "I doubt it. But that wouldn't be you, and I don't think that would be Dean."

Cas chuckled at that. "Are you saying that I move fast?"

"I'm saying that your heart knows what it wants, Castiel." Amara smiled softly before standing up. "Do not let your cousin's death be in vain. Survive, Castiel. Live and love."

"You make it sound so easy. Inias shouldn't have been there." Cas frowned. "He came running after me because he knew that I went running after you."

"All the more reason to honor his sacrifice." Amara walked towards the archway connecting to the room where Inias was still laid out for respect.

Cas waited until his Aunt left the room before standing up himself. Taking a sniff of the stale bunker air, he found Dean's scent and headed in that direction. He turned down the hallway, stopping in what Gabriel had gotten converted or fixed up into living quarters. Continuing down, he stopped in front of a room filled with several bunk beds. On one, Anna sat, sobbing into Dean's shoulder, their backs to the door.

"You know, I know you think I hate him." Gabe's voice caused Cas to jump in place. "But he is a good person."

"You admitted that you're the one that's constantly giving him shit, Gabe." Cas rolled his eyes and leaned on the doorframe. "Do you believe all of what Aunt Amara said?"

"I believe you have the opportunity that others only dream of. It's not unheard of, but it's rare. And the fact that it's attached to someone that good looking?" Gabe mocked a chef's kiss before turning serious. "In all seriousness, I get your fears."

"Say this situation was you and Meg, instead of me and Dean." Cas crossed his arms over his chest. "Do you really understand my fear?"

"Meg and I are not an apt comparison."

"Humor me." Cas rested his head against the door frame as he continued to watch Anna and Dean, only catching brief parts of their conversation.

Gabe let out a sigh. "Meg and I are like Mentos and Diet Cola. Mix us together, and it's explosive in all the right ways."

"And messy and gross afterward?"

"No. Maybe. Stop, you're knocking me off my train of thought." Gabe paused. "But, just like Diet Coke and Mentos, we're boring as separate people."

Cas rolled his head to the side and looked at Gabe. "I disagree, but continue."

"If it weren't for Naomi arranging for us to get together, it wouldn't have happened. Not naturally. She wouldn't have looked at me twice, and I never would have thought I stood a chance. Our chemistry was forced together, but it ended up working out for the best." Gabe poked Cas' cheek and turned his head back towards Dean. "Your chemistry is natural and flowing freely. But it almost seems like you're fighting it. Let it happen, Cassie."

"Is it natural if it's jumpstarted?" Cas questioned as Dean gave Anna a bear hug.

"Yeah. Just because it's moving a little faster than you anticipated doesn't make it any less natural." Gabe hesitated before speaking again. "You know, he does fit nicely into the pack dynamics, even if he isn't a wolf." Their sister stood and walked towards them. "Go get'em, tiger." Gabe clapped Cas on the shoulder before holding his arm out for Anna.

Cas turned his attention back into the room and watched as Dean got to his feet and stretched. He felt like a creeper and prepared to walk away when Dean turned around, and their eyes met. "Cas."

"Hello, Dean." Cas pushed himself off the doorframe just in time to be enveloped in Dean's arms. "What's going on?"

"I know you can close off our connection, but I don't know how to do the same." Dean pulled back enough to look into Cas' eyes. "I could feel your emotions, mostly of fear and anxiety. And I knew it was because of me."

"Can I explain?"

Dean shook his head. "You don't have to. All I feel right now is the amount of relief flowing from you."

"But, you were worried." Cas cupped Dean's face, stroking his thumb over the apples of Dean's cheeks. "I'm sorry I did that to you." Cas surprised himself by leaning back in and kissing Dean again. He was even more surprised - pleasantly so - when Dean deepened the kiss.

He didn't know or cared who stopped the kiss, but Cas found himself wanting more, chasing after Dean's lips.

"Cas." Dean moved his head to the side and kissed Cas' cheek. "If we keep this up, we're going to do something very private in a not so private area." Dean carded his fingers through Cas' hair, and Cas was briefly reminded of Dean stroking his fur while in wolf form. "And it's probably not a good time to do this."

"I don't understand." Cas tilted his head, frowning. "Do you not want me?"

Dean laughed heartedly, and Cas relaxed a little. "That's the furthest thing from the truth, Cas." He rested their foreheads together. "I want our first time to be us. On our terms, in one of our beds. Not a quick fuck out of horniness and desperation in your safe house."

"Fair enough." Cas readjusted and wrapped his arms around Dean's waist as Dean wrapped his arms around Cas' neck. "We continue to let us grow, we keep nurturing what we have, and when we're past all this..." Cas stole another kiss. "We find time for us."

"Sounds like a plan, Cas. I–" Dean's phone rang, causing Dean to jump in surprise. "I guess I have signal here." He pulled it out and smiled. "Hey Sam, what's the news?" Cas listened to the warbling of Sam coming through the earpiece. With each phrase, Dean's smile turned into a frown.

"Dean?" Cas lightly squeezed Dean's sides, hoping to provide him some comfort.

"Sammy, I'm with Cas. I'm going stop you where you're at and put you on speakerphone, so you don't have to repeat everything twice." Dean pulled the phone away from his ear and held out the phone between them. "Okay Sam, go ahead."

"Alright, so what I've already said. Jody and Donna haven't found our father yet. What they have found is the trail he's leaving behind." Cas perked up at Sam's words and looked at Dean. "He's using his skills from his stint in the military, and his time at war, to stay hidden. John's doing a good job of making himself scarce, and he's constantly staying at least one step in front of them."

"Basically, he knows that the permit's been voided," Dean commented, and Sam confirmed with a hum.

"Sam, you said he's left a trail?" Cas asked, holding his breath, as he hoped it wasn't what Cas thought Sam meant.

"Besides Inias, he's killed a human officer, a vampire, and a vetala. Which will end up killing another vetala as they were a mated pair. At each scene, he's left the same, exact message." Sam's voice was trembling, and Dean lost all color from his face.

"What's the message, Sammy?" Dean moved the phone out to the side as Cas pulled him back into a tight embrace.

Sam's swallow was audible. "The long and short of it? The Old Man is here on a job, and he's staying until the job is finished. He's been offered a large amount by one Naomi Novak, and he intends on collecting it. John is demanding the children of Naomi Novak, or he's going to continue to take out innocent people until he finds them."

Cas' knees went out from under him, and he barely registered Dean calling his name or calling out for Gabe and Anna.

The world spun around him. And then it was dark.

[hypnowave]

List 5 things that make you happy, then put this in the askbox for the last 10 people who reblogged something from you. Learn to know your mutuals and followers ❤

okay ily for sending me this no joke!! this is such a huge infodump i'm actually going to cry

1) just dance + dance central 3,, you DEFINITELY expected this one, i never shut up about how much i love both of these games and how they've helped me get exercise 6 days a week during the pandemic. i don't even OWN a copy of dance central 3 yet (though that might change when i get off my ass and actually spend some time looking at secondhand xbox 360s and kinect sensors) but it was something i was completely obsessed with in my childhood and it feels really nice to be able to talk about how happy it makes me without feeling shameful about it being weird or niche. it's a game where you can time travel using the power of swag dance moves, what's not to love?? on the other hand, i got a digital copy of just dance 2020 on discount not long after i got my switch, and i've managed to get the megastar rating on 95 songs so far! i'm hoping to hit 100 before just dance 2021 releases in two to three days, but even if i don't manage to get it by then, i'm still pretty excited to hit that milestone. i'm also currently trying to memorize the choreography for the alternate routine for lady gaga's bad romance and oof ouch my bones

2) i started watching buzzfeed unsolved true crime about two days ago and i'm absolutely hooked. i have no idea how i've gone so long without watching it (save for one episode that i took a look at because i was curious about the particular case they were talking about), but it's nice finally having something to put on while i eat my meals that isn't pokemon or among us. both games are great, but sometimes you just need to throw something fresh into the mix, y'know? it also feels nice going on a true crime kick again in general, haha.

3) I LOVE MY CHARACTERS AND ART and i've been drawing a lot of humans recently! i feel like i'm actively improving and that i'm gradually becoming more confident with my human artwork. i'm no maestro and i know my work isn't astounding by any means, but doodling my friends' characters and seeing their reactions has helped me push forward and try new things when it comes to art. i don't draw my own characters as often, but i've been working on some new plots and it's slowly coming together and it's giving me that sweet sweet serotonin. tangentially related but my FRIENDS' characters and art also makes me incredibly happy. i'm now going to annoy the hell out of them by tagging them; @/polygarnstars you know i would absolutely die for all of your characters (especially bate and fanael. horrible children) + i swear you know my own characters better than i do, @supernovacity if i had a nickel for every time i drew eyvind i'd probably be able to get a better laptop and drawing tablet by now, @arasolcan YOUR CHARACTER CONCEPTS AND DESIGNS SLAP and i always love when i get a chance to hear about them and doodle them, @kingsmanmechanics the starboys live rent free in my head and our current AU is SO GOOD i love it, @fihyn hello i love elvoth and co., and i should honestly take a shot and drawing more of your characters!! they're so unique and i'm excited to see what you have planned for 'em.

4) my cats,, i have five cats and they all share one brain cell. mochi usually has that brain cell. kiki still doesn't understand that she's not allowed on the bed and i've given up on trying to convey it to her sgdhgnshfkd

5) uhh i'm highkey blanking out because i really gotta go get some sleep but man, i can't believe i'm in university. sure, it's a stressful thing to go through, and i'm not going to pretend that the pandemic isn't making it even harder to socialize and get out of my comfort zone, but a year ago i was thoroughly convinced that i wouldn't get to experience this. the fact that i managed to get here and study the things i'm interested is amazing to me and i don't think i give myself enough credit for that :")