#if anyone wants to know more
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neil josten and percy jackson are variants of each other and in this essay i will
#if ANYONE wants to know more#please PLEASE tell me#i want to talk about this so bad#aftg#neil josten#percy jackson#all for the game
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HERE PERSONA 5 AU TAKE IT
base 4 party members by the way, Charles, Xander, MonoTV and Teruko :))
#teruko tawaki#xander matthews#monotv#persona 5#look at em#if anyone wants to know more#I’d be down to dm and shit#just to rant for 59 hours#David is 100% a palace owner#I’m right#fanganronpa#danganronpa#danganronpa despair time#drdt#charles cuevas
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Main Verse
I just wanna write out a little blurb for Shivan's main verse here so I'll put it below the cut and anyone can read it. Its tagged NSFW for TW just to be careful
TW bc I did write about rough times in Wall Market (references, not in details I might put it later)
Shivan absolutely didn't want to get involved in any politics or in secrets and such. He loves the freedom of his job- or the freedom he gets to at least be himself at times. Acting for clients, he can put on a mask and play any role they want and take the pay home.
It wasn't all sunshine and roses obviously- he worked in Wall Market, there was some very rough days and weeks that went by for him there, but that's also why he started to be an escort. He could be a little selective on the people he was with, and make sure they were at least decent in their behaviour. But even then, that didn't mean everyone was a model citizen when behind closed doors.
But he also learned that people can and will spill their guts if he wormed his way in enough. He could get an answer out of someone by using his skills to his advantage. Shivan could also play the innocent Honeybee and get physical things as well, now that he was working outside the Inn. He could take things from clients and they wouldn't notice it was missing until it was too late and they were destroyed by their enemies that had paid Shivan just that much more to get information.
#Such a Scandal We Cause {NSFW}#Im gonna add more later#If anyone wants to know more#Just send me a message#On the Grapevine [OOC]#Buzzing Gossip [Headcanons]
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The FNAF Vanessas meet their younger selves..
#myart#chloesimagination#comic#fnaf#five nights at freddy's#fnaf vanny#fnaf vanessa#vanessa shelly#vanessa afton#fnaf movie#security breach#fnaf fanart#MORE SCENE VANNY 🩵🩵🩵#also this is a semi sequel to the Mikes ver I made#seeing I think the Vanessas deserve the funny too 😤#I like to think Vanny would tell her younger self white lies#she knows at that age she just wanted to know life would get better for her#seeing teen her was stuck living with her awful father#Vanessa’s life does get hard again as an adult but.. SINCE HW2 I think she’s in a better place#finally stood up to her abuser and all so it does get better#WHILE MOVIE VANESSA …#bit more manic here BAHAH#listen if younger Vanessa loosen screws on her fathers suit#would anyone even know 🙏🏾#she could get away with it-#Movie Vanessa of course would want to prevent things anyway she can#the Afton kids always being a lil crazy is so real
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listen i know i haven't posted anything in like three years but here's some iwtv fanart<3
edit: prints of this can be found here!
#iwtv#interview with the vampire#louis de pointe du lac#claudia iwtv#lestat de lioncourt#my art#fanart#if anyone wants to see more iwtv art genuinely let me know!! i have A Lot of it
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obligatory beach divorce doodling
bonus rough cover redraw of x-men #41 (1995) But Beach Divorce below cut
#mcu#marvel cinematic universe#xmen#xmen movies#xmen first class#cherik#charles xavier#erik lehnsherr#professor x#magneto#snap sketches#'snap i thought you were drawing old cherik this weekend' so did i but i was inflicted with visions sorry </3#i have my lil 92 comic sketched so ill do that tomorrow. not finish it but ill work on it 💀#i wsa just gonna draw the first thing but then i figureed i might as well draw Most of the beach-divorce-related things i want to#just so i could put it all on one post. however this is a lie and i know ill wanna doodle more beach stuff#the first drawing Unsurprisingly was motivated BY the xmen 41 legion quest cover- at the very least the total blackout of erik's face#i wanna draw more of erik using his powers .. i wanna figure out how i wanna draw the effect etc etc#i was just gonna redraw the cover but i already liked the sketch i did of the first thing so. here we are#plus i figure someones already done a redraw of the cover but if anyone cares ill finish my version ig LOL#as for the comic ermmm it was just an excuse to draw erik with glowing eyes </3 and fading-glowing eyes </3#thats why i didnt draw the whole. Choking Moira bit. but i wouldve if i was redrawing the whole scene#kinda wish i did now that i think of it cause it coulda looked cooler prob but oh well maybe in like. three months when i redraw this#for exactly five cents ill redraw the whole beach divorce erlkjealkaje i can see it so clearly in my mind#what if first class was a comic drawn by a freak thatd be wild#but yeah thats why everything look rough as christ these were just supposed to be silly lil thangs#'silly things' and its beach divorce OK.#ok bye im gonna do my homework
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Hey if people are thinking of 'stockpiling HRT' and you are doing it with Testosterone, be aware that is a controlled substance and doing this WILL GET YOU A FELONY CHARGE IF YOU ARE CAUGHT (and it would be very easy for this to happen through the way those posts reccomend).
Its your decision if you want to risk imprisonment (and then definitely losing hrt access), but be aware of the serious consequences- especially if you are recommending this to people!
If you do this with E, you get a slap on the wrist. If you do this with T its a felony. A felony charge deeply effects everything you do. Its not just hard to DYI T, its MANY TIMES LEGALLY RISKIER AND HARDER.
#'dyi hrt its fine anyone can'. Tell me you dont know or care doing that with T will get you time in prison and a permanent criminal record#stop passing posts saying to do this without this warning on it. This kind of charge ruins lives and monkey business CANNOT be relied on#'just trust that they are overworked enough to not check they filled it out right and that they will buy your lie'#the second they catch on you are FUCKED. The consequence is not 'uwu you just wont get more extra' its a court date and a cop up your ass#it is NOT fearmongering to say this. do not fuck around with controlled substances when there is a PAPER TRAIL??? HELLO?#do you want access to meds permanently revoked? A mark like that is how you get doctors to not want to give them to you Forever#wayward rambling#rebloggable but clowning will get the post locked
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i'd heard about the new minecart mechanics and people launching themselves off ramps, but i wanted to see how practical it was for travel. used buttons so that the rails would go back to their off positions after i used them... but hitting the button is really hard once you get going kjhfkg
behold: the multidirectional centrifuge
#this has FOR SURE been done before but idc i wanted to do it myself. i havent been keeping up with new updates#welp i know where all my iron is going in my next world kjhfg#video#mine#btw the speed section with two different lines attached is weirdly shaped for a reason#for some reason if it faced the other directions then the button wouldnt work right???#if i hit the button the rails would disconnect and would be connected by default. opposite of what i wanted#no idea why that is happening. tried a lot of things to fix it. anyone know??#this is the most complicated redstone i've ever done btw literally ALL i use redstone for is occasionally pushing a block 😭#so if the solution is very obvious sorry. if there is a more practical build here sorry. i am not a redstoner im sober 😔#flashing
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Etho's behavior in session 5 was frankly unhinged. he killed Bdubs' horse IN FRONT OF HIM and managed to get away scot-free in the chaos of the situation. AND THEN he stole the chicken farm hopper while HALF THE TEAM was in their base without them noticing, tried to trade it BACK to them, and finally returned it after GAINING THEIR ALLIANCE? what even. good for him.
#no one else is doing it like him. except for maybe 3rd life Impulse. and we all know how that worked out for him#speaking of. Impulse expressing fear that His trident which he gave to Etho would be used to stab him in the back???#I wonder why he would worry about that. haha.#I'm so ill#Etho is so thoroughly unreadable it is frankly anyone's guess if he intends to betray his new alliance#my money is on no outright betrayal but he basically continues to live with BET until everyone goes red and he wants more friends#wild life spoilers#wild life smp#ethoslab#trafficblr#life series
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real talk having the 2nd worst new years eve yet 🤢🤢🤢 (throat infection, twisted neck, banged-about-foot, ego AND the rest o' me all bruised like misjuggled peaches 🍑🍑🍑)
im bent outa shape and suspectin the universe owes me 8 buck if anyone wannsa chip in
#yes the 🍑🍑🍑was just an excuse to shove ass emojis in your face i'm only (occasionally. allegedly) human#now ask me about my FIRST worst new year eve. it involves wizards and portals and elaborate lies i make up on the spot#SAD REAL TALK <STARTS>:#also made the mistake of reaching out to my mom post-xmas#like what kind of c-ptsd NOOB does that. what kinda chronic holiday trauma survivor NOVICE??? embarrassing#THE SEDUCTIVE FALSE HOPE OF NOSTALGIA WILL LURE YOU IN EVERY TIME#'oh but maybe they won't disappoint me. but maybe they won't rip my heart out this time'#sweetheart that's your dear sweet inner child's yearning for what never was or will be. BEAT IT BACK WITH A STICK!#SAD REAL TALK <ENDS>#....back to that part where i talked about being bent out of shape#if anyone w/ metalwork skills wants ta take a blowtorch & hammer & tongs & have at... I'm open to experimentation is all im sayin#in lieu of that i would also welcome someone buying me a sandwich. i am. so sore.#(metaphysically sore but also the other more urgent im-at-my-daily-NSAIDs-limit kinda sore)#(hence: sanwimch)#...i got so sleepy writing this i started imagining the astonishing hedonism#of stroking a freshly grilled cheese-dripping sandwhich across my body like a loofah#the soothingness of the gooey warm near liquid cheese. the vaguely spongelike quality of toasted sourdough slice.#look i didn't imagine it on PURPOSE it just came to me like a vision like a threat#like one of those weird mens locker room ads where the sportsball is watermelon??? u know the one#where there's nudity & food & homoerotica & hot steaming showers in the background and STILL the overall effect is more offputting than sex#look i have a throat infection. i can barely swallow. i'm sipping chocolate milk to survive and i'm NOT EVEN ENJOYING IT. each drop is agon#(opposite side of the Tantalus spectrum but i'm suffering more than he has in 3.5 thousand years)#i'm dehydrated. barely conscious. electrolytes are circling down the drain. doctors should be incubating me w/ capri sun straws right now.#I GET A PASS ON THESE TAGS#i don't know what i wrote! and i don't stand by it! and you can't make me read em!!!
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18+, college roommate!vi cinematic universe thigh-riding, questionable vape-usage, oral (vi receiving), smut with a fluffy ending
"s-sweet fuck, pretty girl -- j-just -- just like that --"
you let out a soft whimper, rutting your hips over her flexed thigh, whining as she leans back, a palm resting on your waist, the other clutching her hot pink vape, bringing it up to her lips for a long hit before tugging you down, blowing the dragonfruit-flavored smoke into your mouth.
you suck in, tasting the bright tang of the vape smoke as your pussy clenches, your clit throbbing as you chase your orgasm, grinding down over vi's leg as she groans thick in the back of her throat, her eyes dark and hazed out as she watches you with parted lips.
"like -- like that?" you ask, your voice high and desperate even as vi bites her lips, letting her head fall back against the wall of her room, her cheeks high with color as you reach down and wedge a hand between your bodies, slipping your fingers under the waistband of her boy shorts to thumb clumsily at her clit. she keens, fingers digging into your waist as she jerks you against her, your juices now so sticky on her thighs that it squelches every time you rut your hips forwards and back.
"fuck -- yeah... mm --" she shifts, hoisting you further up just to meld her mouth with yours, licking into your mouth as your pace stutters and you groan, fingers clutching at her shoulders, her biceps, steadying yourself on her arms as she kisses a harsh line down your neck, sucking a deep hickey into the junction of your throat. "shit, you're so -- so hot, so pretty--"
"vi -- vi -- m'so close --" your lashes flutter as you feel the familiar twist in your gut, the warm already spilling through your limbs.
she chuckles, "c'mon princess --" she tugs on your chin, blowing another puff of smoke in your face, smirking when your breath hitches, "look at me -- wanna see your face when you fuck yourself stupid on my thighs --"
the tension in your belly snaps, your whole body shaking as your orgasm rocks through you. and vi -- she guides you through it, groaning out long and low as she feels you twitch over her, your cunt squeezing around nothing as you ride out your own orgasm against her. you eyes flicker but she keeps you upright, forcing you to look at her even as the edges of your vision fizz out into white sparks of pleasure.
she kisses you as you come down, grinning at the way you whine when she pulls away for another hit of the vape, opening her mouth as you press back in, your fingers finding the soaked folds of her cunt, pressing in, her kissing you as smoke wreathes out the corners of your mouths. you trade the same breath back and forth till you lose count, till you can't figure if the sweetness is the smoke or just the tingling addiction of her mouth on yours.
"mm... wow, princess -- that was --" she hiccups as you press a line of sloppy kisses down her neck, the pale, lamp-kissed bend of her shoulder, the small divot between her breasts, pausing to lave your tongue over her nipples, the piercings there cold as you suck them between your soft lips. your revel in the way she gasps then, the way her fingers bite into your skin.
you reach up wordlessly to tug the vape from her slack fingers, her eyes half-lidded and alight with a loose, liquid hunger as she watches you work down the length of her body.
"you're so wet, vi..." you murmur, pressing a kiss to her hipbone, smiling up at her as you tug on the waistband of her boyshorts. she lifts her hips, her cheeks darkening as she clears her throat.
"yeah well -- 's not like you can blame me -- oh shit --"
her head thunks back against the wall as you dig your nose into the thin trail of hair that leads to her sopping folds, the slick there glistening in the wane light. you only allow yourself a second to admire her before bringing the vape to your lips and sucking in a breath of the synthetically sweet smoke, and then you're lowering your mouth to her and pressing your tongue into her slow, moaning long and loud, your eyes fixed on her face, watching for the twitch of her lips, the slack in her jaw.
"jesus christ -- mm-mngh --!"
you fight back a grin as she whimpers, her thighs tightening on either side of your face. her fingers dig through your hair as she forces her eyes open to look down at you, an open, needy expression on her face that you doubt she'd willingly show to anyone else. but the knowledge that you can bring her to such pleasure quickens your own pulse and drives you forward as you give her clit a hard suck and she keens again -- that gorgeous, high, helpless sound even as she presses you harder against her folds and jerks against your face, guiding you into a rhythm that suits her needs.
"fuck, fuck, fuck princess --" she lets out a string of incoherent swears as you feel her shove your face into her harder and harder, and all you can do is offer up your mouth, your tongue, anything and everything you can till she shakes apart above you, her release coating your lips and dripping down your chin.
you lap at it hungrily, savoring the salty-sweet-tang even as she finally relaxes her thighs and you manage to pull yourself up for a breath. your face is sticky, and honestly, so is she, but her laughter is warm when she tugs you up to give you a lingering kiss.
your head is a smoke-filled euphoria of half-formed thoughts as the pair of you collapse, boneless, sweaty, and sated onto her messy sheets. she kicks off her boyshorts, leaving her just as naked as you already were as she curls around you, her arms solid and strong, yours curled against her chest, your fingers splayed over the smooth expanse of her skin, tracing abstract shapes as you turn to face her.
"you got somethin' on your face there, sweets," she says, rubbing at thumb down your slick-covered chin. you crinkle your nose, turning to wipe your face messily against her bicep even as she laughs.
"mm... why didn't we do this sooner?" you ask, curling into her, your faces inches apart.
"what, this like -- smoke each other out and have amazing, mind-blowing sex?" vi asks, grinning.
you giggle, shaking your head, "no! i mean -- well, yes, but like... this.." you reach out and cup her cheek, the touch so gentle it stills you both.
vi sighs, shrugging, "dunno, cupcake. i -- i guess i was caught up in..." her eyes cast about her room, the band posters and hand-scribbled workout notes tacked to her wall, "in wondering if you -- if you felt the same about me, i just..."
you purse your lips around a burgeoning smile, "you just... forgot to ask me?"
vi scoffs, rolling her eyes, "yeah, yeah, whatever. we get it -- you had to make the first move but --" her eyes soften, and so does her voice, "at least we're here now, right?"
"mm," you nod, inching closer, "and we've still got another six months left on the lease."
"six months is a long time," vi says, her voice husky as she rubs a thumb along your cheek.
"yeah... plenty, if we're trying to make up for lost time but..." you hesitate over a held breath, "what happens after?"
"after... we both graduate?"
"yeah."
for a moment, vi's silent. and all around you, the future stretches out like the moonless night, tendrils of shadow reaching like spindled fingers into the unknown future.
"after that... i go wherever you go, cupcake."
you blink, eyes meeting hers, a startled spark of uncertainty rising within you.
"you..."
vi smiles, a crooked, honest thing of lips and teeth. she hooks her ankles around yours and presses your foreheads. her hand comes up to caress the back of your neck.
"if you think i'll ever let you go again after all that... you've got another thing comin', princess."
you let out a relieved laugh, leaning in for a kiss.
"right. i guess the orgasm really was that good, huh?"
vi laughs too then, a soft, breathy sound.
"sure. but really... i mean it. i'm yours, cupcake. for as long as you'll have me."
your lashes flutter; your heart skips. then, you're the one pulling her in for a kiss, one that's sweet as it is consuming. the skin-scalding simmer of a long-burning flame, a spark catching hold on a breath of summer wind.
"i might not be a theoretical physicist, but from what i've heard, forever is a really long time," you say. and vi, to her credit, only takes a second before understanding blossoms in her eyes and she pulling you to her, crushing you in a stomach-turning embrace.
"you're my everything, princess. you know that?"
you bury your face in the crook of her neck and breathe her in. the room smells like sex and sweat and the soft perfume of your shared shampoo. you grin, a giddy heat pluming up your chest to coil at the back of your throat.
"and you're mine, vi."
vi puffs out a breath, her voice just a tiny bit shaky as she cradles your head in her palm.
"yeah. i know, sweets. i know i am."
#⛈ monsoon season#hULLO i am IN MY FEELS 2NITE#i love how half of this is ABHORRENT smut and the 2nd half is just TOOTH ROTTING FLUFF#♨ steamy#vi x reader#arcane x reader#vi smut#arcane smut#vi arcane smut#vi x you#arcane x you#violet x you#violet smut#and on today's episode of ONLY orgasms and happily ever afters for vi in this household --#i truly CANNOT help myself like all roads lead to gross happy endings for my vi fics theres no other way i know (or want) to write them#you literally WILL NOT catch me doing this shit for anyone else WOW#college roommate!vi#this is post them getting together in case that wasn't obvious#i guess the smut won out in the end for the 2 drabbles HAHHA#but cool alright now time to go write MORE fluff#the level of gratuitous self indulgence here is so astronomically high#arcane
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Art dump from the past few days cuz this is my coping mechanism for.. everything going on rn
I kinda think the lineart by itself looks a bit better
#edit: I had to rearrange the pictures because tumblr automatically put a ‘read more’ on the post#and I wanted yall to be able to see certain pictures first#I don’t want that but don’t know how to get rid of it on a specific post#if anyone know how to do that plz tell me#my art#digital art#lego monkie kid#lego monkie kid fanart#lmk#lmk fanart#lmk mk#lmk red son#lmk sun wukong#lmk spicynoodles#spicynoodleshipping#lmk sunburst duo#sunburst duo#lmk macaque
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balor + ponytail (feat my farmer isa)
#fom#fields of mistria#balor#farmer#isa#art#fanart#ONE MORE FANART....FOR THE ROAD...#did anyone else peep his beach outfit because....sir....i need to know what you went through to get that bigass scar#i cant remember what his beach outfit was but i think it was something like that#also....my farmer....i named her isa and made her so cute...#i think i have a thing for making my girls have fluffy hair#in my head i wanted her to be a cool little filipino adventurer girl#she pretti...#i purposely gave her the bright green eyes and gold earrings/headband#so balor will unconciously gravitate toward her (if shiny gold and jewels and treasure was a person)#shes wearing the adventurers earrings you get from the renown levels i actually have no idea what theyre supposed to look like#its like 2 pixels in the game#he doesnt wear rings in-game but i think he should
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Been having Secretly Smart Steve thoughts except it's less that his intellect is a secret and more that nobody ever noticed lmao
The initial thought for this is based on my mom's stories about acting like a ditzy airhead in high school but then graduating with honors
Within five minutes of walking into high school Steve definitely clocked that being cool was more important than being smart right? So he didn't really let on that he was good at class stuff and just let people think he was a simple jock
And Steve graduating isn't a huge thing cuz it happens during UD stuff which means they all miss graduation ceremony and just get their degrees later, so it's not like anyone saw the honors tassels that steve was given to wear with his grad gown
And the first real hint is Lucas trying to make a basket and getting frustrated. And Steve is like "here I'll show you" and proceeds to make every throw he makes from anywhere on the court and when Lucas asks how the fuck he does that Steve shrugs and is like "well, i mean, its all angles man"
Later Mike and Will are working on an egg drop project (you know the ones) and getting worked up cuz the eggs keep cracking. Steve has been watching TV or something the whole time and outta nowhere is like "yall are missing shock absorption and proper wind resistance, duh"
Nancy is trying to decode some number based cipher for fun but it's becoming rapidly Not Fun and Steve looks over her shoulder for like two seconds and goes "group the numbers into twos, subtract 18 from each, and then it's the alphabet letter based on the number" and then just walks off
Dustin is taking an engineering class and is having trouble building a bridge cuz it keeps collapsing when he sends a hot wheels car over it. Steve tells him he needs more load-bearing beams and to distribute the weight evenly and Dustin is surprised when it works
And, of course, Eddie sees all of this so one day when Max or Erica ask for help with some geometry homework he takes the worksheet they give him and immediately passes it along to Steve, waves off their disbelief, and sits all smug while Steve explains concepts they'd been missing entirely
#steve harrington#stranger things#stranger things the party#subtle steddie#bc of course#anyway im sure theres more to come but i wanted to share these main thoughts#i do love when a character is smart in ways people didnt expect#like yessssss subvert those preconceived notions#and then the angst potential of course#of steve realizing before meeting eddie and robin that not even nancy really knew he was good at this stuff#and hes wondering if anyone will ever actually know him as more than a jock or king Steve#and then platonic stobin and he blurts it all out cuz truth serum#looking thats all nothing else nothing at all your honor he definitely wasnt staring at steves moles and freckles
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despite Laios low self esteem making him think that if he’d been eaten, Chilchuck and Marcille wouldn’t have helped Falin,
theres a small part of me that thinks the reason Chilchuck stayed with the party and went back in the dungeon in the first place was because he didn’t want to leave Laios alone. That Laios was moreso the reason he stayed.
#dungeon meshi#chilaios#OK SORRY. THE DEMONS. I REALLY DID NOT WANT TO LIKE THIS PAIRING. I DIDNT. BUT. HHH. FHFHJFJV. I FEEL CRAZY. LET ME EXPLAIN.#Pre canon it seems Laios is the person Chilchuck is really the closest to#He gets along with Namari and they are probably way better as buddies than he and Laios but#He and Laios seem *closer*#If that makes sense#Laios calls him his first name enough and without any issue or hesitation from Chilchuck#That I sort of inagine its not like. A misunderstanding. Laios is on a first name basis with him for a reason.#He also worries probably more than anyone about Laios#And his biggest criticism of him is that hes “reckless”#he’s comfortable around Laios in a very specific way and so is Laios around him#and in the series he shows many times that he’ll risk his life to protect Laios#Like staying with him to confront the elves because he was worried Laios would say something stupid#Hes the first one to run up to him when Falin punches him#I mean I think he was also going back for Falin like its not like I think he doesn’t care about her or anything#He clearly does#But I don’t know if he’d have gone back if Laios hadn’t#And if Laios had been eaten I think he wouldn’t have even had to be convinced by Falin#I also think Marcille would’ve gone back for him but probably more bc Falin was going back#Like sort of a reversed thing#AGAIN not that I don’t think she cared about Laios at the beginning either#But she before the story she was mostly Falin’s friend who knew Laios through Falin#She only really got to know him when Falin got eaten and they had to do a team building exercise#Though now I sort of want to see an actually reversed scenario#Bc we also know that Chilchuck is sort of uncomfortable around Falin (said in relationship chart)#So I would love to see them be forced into a team building exercise to find a person they both love the way Laios and Marcille were
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Rereading Dickens Christmas Carol for the first time in a long time. And the more I reread, the more it strikes me how seamlessly a queer reading could slip within these pages. Not an especially twee reading, wherein all Scrooge's troubles start and end with grief over Jacob Marley's death. For we know that Scrooge was a "Tight-fisted hand at the grindstone, Scrooge! a squeezing, wrenching, grasping, scraping, clutching, covetous, old sinner!" And we know that he and Marley were "two kindred spirits"
And perhaps that very fact makes the similarities to queer life, unintended as they most likely were by Mr. Dickens, achingly poignant to me. Scrooge is, we're told, "secret and self-contained and solitary as an oyster." How much that resonates, for so many of us who shield our innermost selves but from a select group of friends. And we know that Scrooge and Marley were, at the very least, certainly that for one another. Scrooge is Marley's sole mourner; his sole executor and beneficiary; and even Dickens notes, "friend." How reminiscent is that of queer couples across history, estranged from their families?
Scrooge lives in a set of chambers that once belonged to Marley—clearly Dickens wanted us to believe Scrooge gave up his own dwellings after Marley's death to economize. But with only a flicker of change, those chambers become _their chambers, rented by Marley as the senior member of the couple. The place is so desolate Dickens notes "one could scarcely help fancying it must have run there when it was a young house, playing at hide-and-seek with other houses, and have forgotten the way out again." The perfect abode for two queer misers who wanted no one prying into their business.
Marley's name is still above the door of Scrooge's counting-house: a mark by which, no doubt, Dickens meant to convey Scrooge such a penny-pincher he couldn't bother to have it changed. But a thing can be both! mark of frugality to ludicrous excess and! mark of mourning. "sometimes," Dickens opines, "People new to the
business called Scrooge Scrooge, and sometimes Marley, but he answered to both names. It was all the same to him."
This is why "death of the author" matters so much, in expanding our interpretations of texts. It is vastly far from the lens Dickens would have intended. But, the idea of a ghost of queerness, so taboo in the society it could barely be glanced at sidewise in this tale that is all about the inexplicable and yet that lingers over everything becomes an astonishing lens through which to read this book. Thinking of Scrooge as a queer man, his "melancholy dinner at his usual melancholy tavern" becomes a eerie prefiguring of the hollowness of days spent by Isherwood's A Single Man. In this universe, little wonder Scrooge doubly hates mention of time with family, marriage, etc. when the precise nature of his grief is both unacknowledged and unacknowledgable.
And readings like this are vital, because the uncomfortable truth is, discrimination doesn't "discriminate between sinners and saints", to borrow a Miranda phrase. It is easy, in my liberal circles, to fight for queer people who hold "the good sorts of politics". But what about men like Michael Hess, culpable for supporting Reagan even as his contemptuous homophobia let the aids epidemic run rampant? How much harder is it to remember Michael had a partner? That he deserves empathy and compassion for being practically tarred and feathered out of the party upon his own aids diagnosis?
Expanding our imaginative universes to include queerness, not as redemptive panacea, but merely as one aspect of identity, personality, often in vicious conflict with others. Even! as we consider those stories equally worthy of being told feels vital if we're ever to truly express the complexity of what queer humanity looks like.
#forgive my less than articulate maundering#am currently listening to a truly splendid full-cast adaptation of said#Christmas Carol#and wanted to jot these things down before I forgot them in the flow of the work.#Scrooge as both! cruel bastard bitching about half a crown he'll pay Bob even though he won't be in the office on Christmas#fuming about his pockets being picked as he scathingly condemns the poor for not throwing themselves#into the oh! so! generous work-houses. And _also! deeply bereaved husband just makes him so! much more _alive and fascinating to me#if anyone knows of good Marley/Scrooge longfic where not an inch! of their dastardliness is sanded off I'd _kill for it#Jacob Marley#Ebenezer Scrooge#Ebenezer Scrooge/Jacob Marley#queer stuff#history#book babbling#lit geekery
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