#if anyone ever happens 2 come across this pls send me it immediately thank u god bless

[butchviking]

there was an artifact i saw once at an exhibition & it was a viking-era child’s drawing of a ship on a piece of wood and it moved me so much when i saw it i started crying immediately and i’ve never been able to find it or find a photo of it since :(

[saviormysticmeme]

Well, a creppy boy started talking to me on the Tumblr chat saying weird shit and asked me to be his valentine out of the blue, so.. Yeah can I request RFA+V+Saeran reacting to that? A creep talking to MC and saying creppy stuff lol. Love ur blog 💕

Is he still bothering you? If he is PM me and his ass is grassOr if you’re just in need of a fake girlfriend/boyfriend/SO also say the word I’m there y’all don’t even know how good I look in drag

Forreal tho, if someone online is ever making you feel uncomfortable don’t be afraid to get assertive or reach out for help.

Anyways

 RFA+V+Saeran react to a Creep creepin on MC

Yoosung

Yandere Yoosung: ACTIVATED i imagine a magical girl animation sequence whenever I say that

You had shown him the messages immediately because you two were playing games on an online server together when you got random, creepy PMs from GameFreak90

‘hey there, I see you’re a high level. U must be pretty good with your hands

want 2 play a game together sometime? it doesn’t have to be online ;)

its almost valentines day you know. we can hang out. ‘

You were so uncomfortable, and it went from uncomfortable to freaked out when you asked GameFreak90 to stop messaging you and he kept going, starting to talk about all the things he’d like to do to you

Yoosung searched the guys name immediately and pulled up his profile

His hands never moved so fast

‘Hey. Quit messaging MC28. She’s a good friend of mine and you’re freaking her out. -ShootingStar’

‘fuck off’

Yoosung was not having it. He didn’t have Seven’s hacking skills, or Jumins money, or Jaehee’s wit or anything the others had

But what he did have was his games

He pulled up TeamSpeak for his LOLOL guild immediately

“Guys, I need backup for an emergency raid”

It was over in minutes

Yoosung’s guild had raided and completely emptied GameFreak90′s base

Yoosung got a string of messages immediately after

hey man what the fuck

dude give me my shit back

fine im sorry im sorry give me my shit please

dude please

Yoosung just turned his mic on and with one last request of his guild “Hey, can everyone here flag this guy for inappropriate behavior”

In about 10 mins Yoosung went to pull up GameFreak90′s profile

It had been deleted

Yoosung had the smuggest of smirks on his face

Until

“My hero” You giggled and kissed him on the cheek

He went from war hero Shooting Star to blushing, stuttering, Yoosung real quick

Jaehee

It was a slow day in the coffee shop so you were just sitting at a table playing on your phone and sipping coffee

Ding.

Huh? New message.

Ding ding ding

You had a bad feeling before even opening your Fumblr app 

When you did open the little social media site, you were met with a bunch of unwelcomed advances from some strange follower

Hey valentines is coming up and im lonely

r u lonely to?

how about u be my valentine and we can go out??

You grimaced and replied with a curt “I’m sorry but no thanks”

come on babe

dont b like that

we can have fun

Jaehee had noticed to look on your face and immediately popped to your side

“Mc is everything alright?

“Yeah..I’m just getting creepy messages from some guy on Fumblr.” You handed her the phone so she could read them and her nose crinkled in distaste almost instantly

“Well your first problem is you apologized.” 

“Huh?”

Jaehee started tapping away as she spoke “Don’t apologize for not being interested. When you apologize it makes you seem more …docile. Submissive. If these creeps think you have an ounce of shyness or even politeness in you they’ll try to exploit it.”

“o-oh.” You stammered, surprised by how irritated Jaehee suddenly seemed

“Secondly,” Her expression softened a bit with a final tap on the screen “You didn’t block him immediately” She looked to you with a smile on her face, pleased with herself for whatever she said to your Fumblr follower

She handed the phone back to you and a light blush fell across your cheeks. Jaehee never seemed to be the protector type but when it comes down to it

Baehee isn’t letting anyone bother you

ever

Zen

He’s gotten his fair share of creepy fan mail, but he understands it comes with the job

But when you get creepy mail from his followers

NO NO NO NO NO

You two have all the fan mail sent to a P.O. Box so fans don’t have your home address

One time when you went to get the batch, the two of you found a handful of letters with your name on them

“My fans must see us together all the time” Zen said as he handed the letters to you, a cautious look on his face. He was worried it was going to be some fangirl writing a mean letter about how she deserves Zen instead of you

It was much creepier

It was a bunch of letters from some guy 

‘My sister is a big fan of Zen so I have to watch TV shows with him on them all the time. One time there was a news story about him, but you were in the picture with him…’

The letters go on to say how once the writer saw you with Zen he started searching you more and claimed you two would be a perfect match. He started suggesting you break up with Zen (offering for him to date his sister) and for the two of you to get together.

…

You have to literally hold Zen back so he doesnt march to the return address and beat the shit out of sender

“Zen it’ll be such bad press do not do not do not”

“I DON’T GIVE A SHIT”

“YES YOU DO PLS ZEN”

20 mins later

He’s not calm, but he’s not bum rushing the door so…calm enough

“Let’s think of a reasonable way to handle this” You slump into a chair, exhausted from being the only thing standing between Zen and a physical assault charge

After a few minutes of silence

..”I have an idea.”

Zen pulled out a pad and started scribbling. “He said his sister is a fan of me? Well I’ll make her an offer she can’t refuse.”

Zen ended up writing a very heartfelt note to the sister of the sender, explaining the situation and how uncomfortable you were feeling because of the brother. And if the sincerity of the letter wasn’t enough to get her to make her brother stop, the VIP pass to Zen’s next show was a good bribe. 

He sent it out the next morning, and a few days later you guys checked the PO box to find a letter from her apologizing profusely for her brother’s behavior and how she’d handle it. And about 10 pages of ‘thank you’s and compliments for Zen of course. 

Jumin

Elizabeth would only chase a laser pointer for so long, so you had a lot of free time whenever Jumin was at work

You were no stranger to social media sites as they were the best way to distract yourself for hours at a time until you had something entertaining to do

And you’ve gotten spam bots before, but never a human who was actually so forward enough to send you enough messages to make you a small novel

you look really nice in your profile picture

is that designer? man you got money to

you’re a rich bitch. wanna come see what its like on the other side of town?

You were appalled. 

“Leave me alone” was the best you could muster since you were in such a state of disgusted shock. 

The messages continued, and you ended up just blocking the guy. But even after that just looking at your phone made you a little nervous that you were going to see more messages from another douchebag

But nope

Same douchebag. Different site. 

why’d you block me? playing hard to get?

“How’d you find my profile?”

it’s not hard to figure it out since I saw your name on the other one ;*

You just blocked him again and put your phone down, resolving to entertain yourself with anything else that wasn’t social media.

Eventually Jumin came home, and the first thing he noticed was your phone sitting on the coffee table and a specific lack of…you.

He went into a panic for a moment before you stepped into the hall, freshly showered. 

“Oh, MC, there you are. I was worried for a second. You’re usually not far from your phone.” 

“Yeah..” You muttered. “Some guy just keeps bugging me”

What

What do you mean

What guy

How

You explain the situation to Jumin and his phone is to his ear almost immediately as he picks up yours with his free hand.

“Luciel? I’m cashing in on a favor….”

You knew immediately where this was going and you had a slight grin on your face, knowing the creep who kept messaging you wasn’t going to be bothering you or anyone else anytime soon

Seven

You don’t even waste time

The second you get the first creepy message

hey hot stuff

You hand your phone to Seven

He just looks down at the screen, and a devious smile spreads across his face

Sure he could mess with anyone he wanted, but this time he has an excuse to go all out and ruin this Creeps life.

Seven whips up a program in a matter of minutes, connects a USB from his computer to your phone, then texts the man back

‘Hey cutie…wanna see a picture? ;)’ and he attached a file 

It says the message was received and viewed, but no response was given.

“What’d you do?” You ask as Seven hands your phone back

With a big smirk on his face:

“Once he opens that file his phone is going to run through his chat logs and play back all his creepy messages  on a permanent loop on his screen. And if he has any wireless connection to his computer, say, cloud storage, it’s going to happen to his computer too. And every few minutes he’s going to get a picture of me dressed as a maid, because I have to deliver, you know?”

You give Seven a huge hug “Ugh, thank you. How will I every pay you back”

“You already did” He laughs

“Huh?”

“You’ll see” He winks and goes back to his computer.

You shrug and walk away, figuring you’d find out soon enough

And you did

The next time you opened your phone, your background was a nonstop slideshow of 707′s Greatest Crossdressing Pics

And all your app icons were selfies

And your gallery was filled with pictures of the red headed hacker

“SEEEEEEEVVVVVEEEEEENNNNNNNNN”

V

V was sitting on the couch and you were upstairs cleaning up and putzing around

Ding

V looked to see your phone light up on the table 

“MC, I think someone messaged you!” V yelled up the stairs

“Will you check it for me? It’s probably just a guest with a question about the party.” You called back 

“Sure.” And with that he opened your phone to find a rather crude picture  “What in the world”

my friend gave me ur number, thought you’d like this ;)

V was horrified that someone meant for you to open this 

‘I dont’ He typed back.

awww come on. you can tell from the pic im a good looking guy and my friend says ur cute. why dont we hang out

“No.” V glared at the number displayed at the top of the message board

playing hard to get? i like

V realized there was no reasoning with this idiot, and he thought it would be a waste of time trying to further communicate with a fool like his, so he bit down his better instinct and just sent a picture of himself glaring at the phone camera and typed “You’re talking to a man”

there was no reply for a moment

my friend said this was a girl

“I can assure I am not a female. Your friend gave you the wrong number. Go away”

There was no response but V was sure he could feel the embarrassment from the other side of the connection

With a satisfied huff he deleted the messages and number, figuring it best if you never have to worry about the situation

He also plans to find out which one of your friends would give your number to such a vulgar creep. 

Saeran

You two were watching a video on your phone when you got a sudden chat request on Kiik, a messaging app

Saeran cast a quizzical look at you and you return it with a shrug, signalling you had no clue

When you open it up theres just a bunch of weird messages

hey babe

hey

wanna be my valentine

i dont want to be lonely and i bet you dont either

we can keep each other company ;)

You didn’t even have a chance to respond before Saeran took the phone from your hand

“Fuck off” He was holding your phone so tight you thought he was gonna snap it in half

wow ur not very polite

“I said. Fuck. Off.” Saeran let out a breath that sounded like a growl

come on baby dont be like that

You could see a fire in your friend’s eyes and you knew things were about to get bad

“Send one more message and I’ll end your miserable existence, Scum.” 

“Saeran let’s just ignore it” You tried to take your phone back but he wouldn’t let go, too hyper focused on the screen. Instead he looked at you and said “He shouldn’t be talking to you this way.”

Ding

Both your eyes shot back to the screen

so you’ll come see me ;)

Whoever was on the other line had nooo clue who they were taunting

Saeran got up slowly, so slow it was a little creepy, when you looked at him you could see the gears running in his head

He walked over to his computer and started typing away, looking to the phone every now and then.

After about 20 minutes he finally came back to sit with you and handed your phone back.

“You….You good, Saeran?” You asked, surprised at how calmed he seemed.

He looked to you with a smile on his face and a glint in his eye. “I’m very good.”

You were almost worried to ask but “What’d you do?”

“Not much. But he’ll leave you alone soon enough.”

You stopped asking questions, he wouldn’t tell you the details anyways.

..

That night you were awoken to 

Dingdingdingdingding

You fumbled around in the dark and eventually opened your phone to see messages from the Kiik app

Iuwefjkgl

ahfuoieqhwf

please helpfehofejijeqiue

…..

I’m very sorry for what I said to you earlier. I will never contact you again. If I do my fingers will be broken.

You knew immediately. 

“Saeran what’d you do???” You sent the text

All you got back was “:)” 

[esseastri]

Literally everyone: AAHH MASS EFFECT ANDROMEDA!!!! Me, seven years late with starbucks: so, I just finished ME2 and yowza, guys

.

Okay, so some of you might remember that a long time ago in a galaxy far, far away (oh shit wrong fandom), I was liveblogging Mass Effect 2. For various personal reasons, I stopped the liveblog some time ago--I jumped ship and liveblogged all three Dragon Age games, and then, when I was meant to pick the ME2 blog back up, some personal shit happened and it was easier for me to just finish the game without the liveblog. I’m sorry if you were looking forward to live Suicide Mission reactions, but I can provide, in bullet point form, a summary of what would have been the end of the liveblog if I’d been able to finish it properly!

(Having now written it up, I guarantee, you’re not missing anything by this not being an immediate liveblog--it is JUST as funny this way, I promise!!)

It did get quite long, so here it is, under the cut:

I successfully scanned/probed every. planet. in the galaxy. I’m not joking. Every single one.

This made for a lot of boring scanning time, but it also revealed a lot of sidequests--all of which I completed. 

This included taking out the entirety of the Blue Suns mercenary operation via fucking up their fake-distress-signal trap and stealing their stolen cargo after killing off several of their captains.

Also I stopped some missiles from crashing into a small colony? I think?

I successfully completed every sidequest that had anything to do with quarians.

Samara’s loyalty mission!

I flirted with her daughter so badly it was embarrassing, but hey, that’s the way to bait serial killers into getting KO’d by their moms, so...

Thane’s loyalty mission:

I’m still genuinely surprised that that security guard honestly believed I was a health inspector are you kidding me I’m fully armed and armored how does this outfit say ‘health inspector’ to you pls I fear for the security of the Citadel

But hey, we stopped the kid from killing anyone, so that’s good.

Also, what is up with my squadies having kids who want to murder people who we have to prevent from murdering people? Guys. This is bad parenting. Pls. 

I scanned some more planets and did a few more sidequests.

Miranda’s loyalty mission:

there was some hinky shit with this whole situation, but it’s Miranda: of course there was hinky shit. But I’m glad her sister was WAY Chiller about the situation than I thought she was going to be.

I AM SAD I MISSED THE PARAGON QUICK-TIME-BUTTON AND MIRANDA MURDERED HER CHILDHOOD BESTIE THAT WAS VERY UPSETTING AND I’M NOT ABOUT THAT LIFE

Jacob’s loyalty mission:

TALK ABOUT HINKY SHIT WITH THE WHOLE SITUATION

tbqh, I’m still not 100% sure what the fuck happened on that mission. I got the toxic food made people wacky, but I’m unclear on the ten-year wait before activating the distress beacon. You cannot have just been chilling like a king while the crew got slowly more poisoned for ten years and been having a good time. Bro, pls.

I’m v glad Jacob was chill with me throwing his dad in jail.

I did some more sidequests. I cannot stress enough how many fuckin sidequests I completed.

LEGION: hoooo boy. 

1. I fucking hate husks and fighting husks and getting swarmed by husks and dying a lot but it’s fine, I’m fine

2. Geth still make me nervous. I understand that there are good geth and bad geth, but I spent waaayyy too long fighting that Colossus on Therum in game 1 to fully be okay with them.

3. Tali’s non-reaction was the most ridiculous and out of character anything in the Bioware universe. There was NO REACTION AT ALL to us activating a geth on board a ship that has an AI installed on it. And no reaction to us recruiting that geth. The only reaction we got--finally, AFTER FINISHING Legion’s mission--was her anger over Legion trying to send info on the Flotilla to the geth. Which, yes, warranted a reaction, but sO DID A LOT OF OTHER STUFF. And the fact that Bioware was too lazy to write Tali some reactions to this geth just chillin’ in our AI Core offends me deeply.

4. Legion’s mission: I really, really didn’t want to do either option, tbh. One felt like genocide and one felt like mind control and I was 100% not there for either of those versions of events. (I eventually decided to blow up the station: see point 2 above.)

The second EDI was like “u should take everyone on the shuttle; the ship will be fine!” I was like, “OH JESUS FUCK NOTHING WILL EVER BE ‘FINE’ AGAIN”

There is nothing--nothing--more #relateable than Joker running through the ship as it’s getting attacked by Collectors and just repeating “shitshitshitshitshit” for the entire time. 

It was about this time that I realized the next THING was the Omega-4 Relay and I had to do some googling. Did you know that the Mass Effect Wikia is 100% Useless when it comes to figuring out how to get through the Suicide Mission without getting anyone killed?

I spent a lot of time being TERRIFIED that I’d somehow missed a ship upgrade, even though there was no possible way for me to have missed a ship upgrade.

GARRUS AND I FINALLY DID THE DO. THERE WERE CANON FOREHEAD TOUCHES. HE WAS A NERD. IT WAS SO FUCKIN CUTE I DIED. IT WAS SO CUTE.

The fight with the Oracle in the basement was waaayy chiller than I thought it was going to be, and my sister, from across the room, just laughed and reminded me that I was playing on Casual mode.

The briefing room scene: 

Miranda: “We’re going to have to split up into several groups.”

Me: “Worst. Idea. Ever.”

Miranda: “You have to pick someone to go in the vents. I volunteer!”

Jacob: “I also volunteer!” 

Me: “Ahh, thanks, but I’ma send Legion, ‘cause Legion is the best tech guy we could possibly ever have? Considering it IS...tech?”

Miranda: “Ugh, fine. Pick someone to lead the second squad. Again, I volunteer.”

Me: “That’s nice. Hey Garrus, darling--meet me at that fucking door, and you better be alive, babe.”

Garrus: “Sure thing, babe.”

Miranda: “Uuughhh, at least we know he knows what he’s doing. Fine.”

SO WE SET OFF INTO THE COLLECTOR BASE, SPLIT UP INTO SEVERAL GROUPS, AND I ALMOST HYPERVENTILATED OUT OF NERVES AND MADE MYSELF COUGH.

I got Legion through the vents without it melting.

I spent a lot of time reminding myself that if you murder all the collector drones before you kill Harbinger, then you only have to kill Harbinger once, as opposed to once for every drone in the room.

There was a terrifying moment at the first locked door, when I was very certain we were all going to die.

No one died.

I WAS REALLY WORRIED THE CREW HAD BEEN LIQUEFIED BUT THEY WEREN’T, I SAVED THEM ALL! IT WAS AMAZING!

Also, the liquefying was suuppper gross and unnecessary, thanks Bioware.

The First Regrouping scene:

EDI: “Sorry, guys, but you need to go through that hallway full of seeker swarms, good fucking luck.”

Samara: “I could probably make a biotic barrier and keep them off us? It’ll be slow, but I can do it.” Miranda: “SO COULD I. Any biotic could do it! I VOLUNTEER!”

Me: “Uh, it was Samara’s idea, soooo...she’s gonna do it.”

Miranda: “FIIIINNE. Someone has to be a distraction and go the other way, though. I fucking volunteer, goddamit, Shep, just let me do my fucking job.” 

Me: “Garrus. Darling. Babe. Be safe.”

Garrus: “Sure thing, babe.”

Miranda: “I’m. going. to. stab. you.” Doctor Chakwas: “Can someone get us back to the ship? We’re all in really bad shape.” Miranda: “We do not have people to spare, sorry.” Me: “Hey, Mordin, I love you, but you are not extra great in combat. Want to escort mission this shit?” Mordin: “Good idea. Joker: need coordinates for pick up.” Miranda: “GOOD. LET’S GO. WE’VE GOT SHIT TO KILL. COME ON.”

At this point, I did feel a little bad for Miranda, but listen: I googled who was best for what, okay. Everyone had to live, okay.

We hiked it through the seeker swarm hallway and it was actually a really cool mechanic! I was impressed!

Thane kept getting into cover outside the protective bubble though, ‘cause he’s a doofus, and Tali and I were just like “pls, son, get inside and stay alive, we can’t take all these collectors just the two of us. I mean, we can, but it’ll go much faster with you helping. get inside the bubble. pls.”

I legitimately thought Samara was going to die of exhaustion before we reached the door. I assume that if she’s not Loyal, she might die there? But everyone was super loyal so it was fine, but I WAS WORRIED.

I had a heart attack when Garrus called for help and we had to bust down the door and save him and the other squad and I WAS SO WOORRRIIEEDD

AND THEN IT LOOKED LIKE HE GOT SHOT IN THE STOMACH AND I LITERALLY SCREAMED I WAS SO TERRIFIED BUT HE WAS FINE AND IT WAS FINE EVERYTHING IS FINE

It didn’t happen, because the game doesn’t support public displays of affection, but if you think that Gen didn’t grab Garrus’ face and kiss the fuck out of him once she’d decided he was alive and not shot, then you and I are not watching the same show.

So, after the traumatized, mid-battle kiss: 

The amount to which I wanted a v small, v scared scene in which Shep got to say a non-goodbye to the LI she is leaving to cover the door as she goes on ahead is astronomical, but the game did not provide, so I’m just going to have to fanfic the shit out of this.

The fucking human-reaper-larva was NASTY AF and I took half a look at it and went “NOPE, I’MA TAKE MY GLASSES OFF AND DO THIS FIGHT BLIND”

my sister laughed at me

I realized after two seconds that that wasn’t going to work ‘cause I couldn’t see the adds, and I had to murder them, too, sooo I put my glasses back on, and it was AWFUL

The “shoot the canisters” part of the fight was SOOOO easy, I was v concerned that I’d messed something up because it was so simple? Just waves of collectors? and then it just FALLS? I was Suspicious.

The Illusive Man chimed in with a “haven’t you people ever heard of working toward goddamned human supremacy” and wanted me to SAVE??? the collector base???? for “““RESEARCH”““???

So I said, “yeah, that’s fucking dumb, we’re not going to do that” and set the place to blow the fuck up

AND THEN I HAD TO FIGHT THE FUCKING TERRIFYING HUMAN REAPER THING AND IT WAS GROSS AND DIFFICULT BUT I WON IT WAS GR9 I DIDN’T EVEN DIE ONCE!!! OR RUN OUT OF AMMO!! IT WAS AMAZING! A MIRACLE!

So then everything blew up and THE PLATFORM STARTED FALLING AND I 100% FOR SURE THOUGHT TALI WAS DEAD

YOU HAVE NO IDEA HOW TERRIFIED I WAS

I STARTED CRYING IMMEDIATELY AND THEN SHEP GRABBED HER HAND AND THEN LOST HER GRIP AND THEN THEY LANDED AND THERE WAS A GIANT BEAM ON TOP OF TALI AND I LEGIT STOPPED BREATHING

I STARTED COUGHING BECAUSE I WAS SO UPSET I STRESSED MYSELF INTO A COUGHING FIT IT WAS AWFUL I WAS CRYING AND MY SISTER WAS JUST LIKE “she’s Loyal, you’re fine, she’s fine” and I continued to freak out until she stood up and it was terrifying.

I then told the Illusive Man to fuck right off, stole the Normandy, and got my peeps together to murder some Reapers.

and BOY HOWDY THAT WAS A LOT OF REAPERS LIKE #YIKES???

SO That was the end of ME2!

A brief review: I liked bits of it, and viscerally hated other bits, tbh. I’m still not a fan of the mechanics, but once I figured out which guns to use against which enemies, things did get slightly better. I still hate the very idea of the Collectors--no one needs bug aliens who kidnap and liquefy people, I mean COME ON--but there was some cool stuff with that plotline as a whole. Also, I hate Cerberus, and I wish the game had let me more explicitly publicly pronounce myself as working WITH them out of desperation as opposed to FOR them because we believed in the same things.

Listen, Evil Martin Sheen, you underestimate how much I LOVE ALIENS and how little I care for the human race. So,

anyway

overall: not bad. Looking forward to the third one much more than I expected, tbqh, and that should be starting soon! I do plan to get back into the liveblogging swing of things, but that one WILL be over on the liveblog blog, found here. I’m hoping to start sometime next week, if not before then, as I’d really like to get to Andromeda before I have to fight the internet over spoilers. So, yeah! Thanks for putting up with this liveblog dying and being resurrected in this truncated form. I hope to see you on the liveblog blog for #Megan plays ME3 SOON! :D