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beneatheaven · 1 year ago

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friends with benefits with soobin

lowercase intended, 1,512 words, haven’t proof read

smut under cut, minors do not interact

another weekend just hanging out at a friends house. this was a more chill and quiet house party. people entering in and out of the house to the backyard, the comfort in seeing your close friends and catching up with them after a week of stressful classes.

what you didn't expect was to see soobin talking to another girl.

not that either of you were exclusive, you just messed around with each other.. a lot. to the point were you both promised each other, this would just between the two of you. he didn't like the thought of you sucking another guys dick, and you didn't like the thought of kissing other girls. so to say you were jealous, was putting it very lightly.

he knew this would hurt you, just seeing him next to another girl, so maybe you were being too possessive, not that he's ever had a problem with that in bed. that was until she leaned in closer to whisper something in his ear, and he flashed a smile at her.

it made your blood boil, what did she say? and what does she want from him. he was yours, kind of, right? running out to the backyard to get away from the sight. it was starting to get too overstimulating with the overthinking.

taking a seat on one of the couple of chairs sprawled outside, taking some time to yourself thinking if any of this was worth it. the idea of you two dating has come up in conversation before. but you had to jump in and say you were too busy for anything serious at the moment. the reality was that, you felt like you weren't good enough for him.

the sound of the sliding door opening and footsteps getting closer to you had broken you out of your thoughts. turning your head to see who had came out, it was soobin. "hey it looked like something happened, are you okay?" he said while coming by to sit to a chair next to you.

"i'm fine, but looks like you were getting comfortable over there." the tone in your voice, he could pick up that you were upset at him. "y/n it's not like that, we were just getting to know each other." his hand finding yours to hold. trying to comfort you, what he did best.

"maybe you can get to know each other some more alone.." you couldn't look at him in the eyes, you felt so frustrated. "i promised you i wouldn't do that with anyone else, you remember right?" nodding your head, he was so patient with you, you didn't deserve him.

"i remember, i'm sorry i just got.. upset." he let out a quiet laugh, he was just so cute. "aw my girl got jealous didn't she?" he leaned into you to whisper "you'll always be my girl." he said as he left small kisses on your neck. he always called you that, and you never had a problem with it, even with the terms you were on.

your heart ached for him, and he felt the same way, he just wanted you to be ready. he didn't want to scare you by coming off to strong or mess up and lose you. maybe it was time to let go and be ready for him. "yes i'll always be yours." turning to him and sharing a sweet kiss.

kissing him felt so sweet and meant to be, there couldn't be anyone else for either of you. bringing your hands up to his face to hold him and deepen the kiss. he reciprocates with his hand finding it's way to your waist. whining into your mouth at the way you pull at his hair slightly, bitting down onto your bottom lip.

"did you miss me baby?" looking at you with hooded eyes "i always miss you." whimpering at him. "don't want anyone else but you soobin, please be mine." a small smile appears on his face. "do you really mean that?" his touch on your waist became softer. "yes, i'm so sorry for making you wait." "i'd wait forever if that's it took." he said immediately. your chest ached at how he made you feel so loved. leaning into kiss him again, your favorite thing ever.

"god i want you so bad, confessing really does something to you doesn't it?" giggling at his words. "we can't do it here everyone is gonna hear." you said as he peppered kisses from your neck up to your ear. "hmm you know how you always wanted to try pubic sex?" whispering into your ear. "mm very briefly, and it'd still be very obvious to everyone."

he started looking around the back yard, anywhere to hide or sneak behind. his eyes landing on a ladder still propped up to head onto the rooftop. there was a flat area, he knew what the next step was. "look, we can go up there." you turned your head to where his focus was. "are you serious?" questioning his thoughts right now. "let me just taste you, and i can take you to my place after for some more..privacy, promise." giving you a quick kiss on your lips. "okay, but just because i know you'll keep your promise."

both of you stood up and made your way over. he helped you get onto the roof smoothly. almost scared you were going to fall off but he held onto your hands tightly. he took off his sweater for you to lay on. making sure this experience was comfortable for you. once he had you under him, he went in to kiss you, one and on your waist and the other holding your face. your hands all over his back, pulling him down closer to you.

bucking your hips up into his would make him moan into your mouth. his sweet moans you loved to hear, all just for you. he removed his hand from your face, bringing it down to to your skirt. hand going under it and pushing your panties to the side."you're so wet for me bay, all for me right." quietly moaning into his ear. trying your best to keep quiet.

coming closer to your ear. "shh not too loud, don't want anyone hearing you do we." shaking your head, he had you so weak for him. running his fingers up and down your folds, lightly pinching your clit, making your knees buckle. thighs clamping around his hand.

he inserted two fingers, thrusting them slowly into you. breathing heavily while looking at his fingers going in and out of you. he would leave wet kisses around your neck, kiss you hard if you were about to get too loud. after a couple more thrust, he took his fingers out to raise your skirt higher and take your panties off. kissing them before putting them into his pocket for later. making your cheeks heat up.

"hold onto me baby." bringing one of your hands to his hair before he brought his lips to your wet pussy. his tongue landing right onto your sensitive clit first, inserting his fingers into you once again. giving it kisses while he thrusted his fingers.

he would go so fast, lapping his tongue on you, having to cover your mouth from your loud moans and whimpers. "good girl, you're so good for me y/n. my perfect girl." gripping onto his hair harder each time his fingers hit that spot inside you. "yea pull my hair like that baby." a loud moan slipping past your hand when he went harder.

he could feel your thighs slightly shaking, you were getting close. "cum on my tongue bay, for me yea?" "yes for you, god yes." taking his mouth off your pussy to kiss you as he kept thrusting his fingers into you. your hands gripping his hair and his shoulders. digging your nails into his long sleeve shirt, the feeling of his soft hair against your hand felt so comforting.

coming down from your high, legs shaking around his hand, chanting his name over and over in a whisper onto his lips. holding him down close to you once again, his closeness was your safe space. he brought his fingers to his lips, licking your juices clean off his fingers. "you came so much, all from going down on you, did you miss me?" catching his breath, you could see how wet his mouth was from you.

"yes, but i don't have to miss you any longer, right?" shaking his head at you, another sweet kiss onto your lips. "no, my girlfriend never has to miss me." smiling up at him. "hmm now can my boyfriend take me home? it's so uncomfortable up here." laughing at how long you both had been up there. "yes yes he will. i'll go down first, and carry you to the car, and wear my sweater to cover you." peppering your face with kisses as he made his way down the ladder. soobin was finally yours.

#txt smut #txt hard hours #txt imagines #txt scenarios #txt x reader #soobin smut #soobin scenarios #soobin imagines #soobin x reader

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buffaloborgine · 1 year ago

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Before reading, I want to emphasize, I don't hate Sephiroth as a character, I hate how some people dismiss all of his heinous acts and cling to "He is a victim" and shove the tragedy he caused onto other characters. About that one post about Sephiroth and someone replying to it, let me be clear: I don't deny Sephiroth was a victim. Like many, he was the victim of Shinra and Hojo, that's undeniable. But to write like he is a good person and all the bad things he did were influenced by his upbringing? NO. Sephiroth is selfish, and no matter what you try to bend the narrative to fit your imagination, it is a fact. When the theme of FFVII is about "imagination/illusion", if we use the structure of protagonist vs antagonist, Cloud is the one that was affected by the illusion but he accepted help from others and got over it. Sephiroth would simply be the reversed version of that, he wasn't even illusioned, he knew for sure what he is but deciding that it was better for him if everyone else, and even himself stayed in that illusion forever. Sephiroth wasn't the only character to be affected by Shinra's evilness, but then let's take a look at those who also were affected: - Zack once learned and accepted that Shinra is evil had started running away with Cloud. - Angeal and Genesis don't share the same reaction but eventually once accepted the truth, they both rebelled against Shinra (also Lazard). - The Turks and Rufus are easy to see, I don't need to explain. - The massacred 1st SOLDIER unit mentioned in Dirge of Cerberus, fighting against the creation of inhuman Deepground facility. - Deepground themselves, they know what they are and they fought against Shinra, knowing they would even die if they do. So many would say, but Sephiroth does disobey Shinra and that he wanted to leave Shinra. Vetoing orders onto co-workers' heads doesn't seem to be a good way to protest, rather that's just push the responsibility onto others. And about "wanting to leave Shinra", as far as I remember, Sephiroth just said he would consider the idea, not that he would ever leave, and even till the event of Nibelheim, he didn't leave Shinra, not at all. So let's put this together, should we just see Sephiroth as a victim and say he isn't accounted for other tragedy happened in FFVII? Personally? Of course not. There are other victims and they fought back their abuser in different ways, maybe causing mayhem on the route but they still fought for their freedom. Sephiroth has never once given a single thought for others, and he was comfortable staying in Shinra, after all, he got the privilege for 1st Class, can veto orders and get admired by other SOLDIERs. To debunk people who claim that Sephiroth was thoughtful about Genesis' injury: Who was the one causing that mess in the first place? And even when you look at the cutscene, it was less of caring thought but more of "Why I am inadequate for this?" If he was sincere, he would have gone to check on Genesis later, but nope, he assumed Genesis was fine, like really, what kind of friend is that? No fucking friend would just assume friend is fine knowing they are hurt, no fucking friend would just condemn friends as traitor while not knowing the reason why they leave, and no fucking friend would keep their friends in the dark while knowing they are being tricked, abused. In conclusion, please stop saying Sephiroth is a good friend to anyone. If he cannot earn Zack's forgiveness, he is a prick, but if even Weiss stood against him (in DFFOO), consider he surely won't get any redemption.

#sephiroth #ffvii #final fantasy vii #genesis rhapsodos #angeal hewley #lengthy rant because some people have strange conclusion that I don't have reading comprehension

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iztea · 4 months ago

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Do you recommend any tutorials for new artists?

i'm gonna be honest with you, I've been out of the loop with recent tutorials so let me tell you about my goats sinix, marco bucci and ahmed aldoori

when I was first getting started, I binge-watched all of sinix videos. he has a great way with words and I've assimilated many of his principles and ideas, which I still use in my approach to this day. I recommend his Anatomy Quick Tips series and his Paintover Pals series (aka art critiques), but honestly just watch all his videos, he covers some very niche but handy topics that I don't see brought up that often. He also has one or two videos about digital art for beginners or intermediates so maybe start there and see how you like it.

Marco Bucci has great videos for understanding colors, lighting and taking a more messy-painterly approach to your paintings (which I've always naturally leaned into anyways). He has this series called 10 minutes to better painting where he basically goes over the fundamentals but in a very fun and digestible way. He also covers niche topics including post-processing tips which are verrryyy much looked over when it comes to digital art.

ahmed aldoori is just generally great at explaining and demos. He's probably the first person I'd go to if I needed help understanding anything art-related, and I mean anyytthinggg (hands, environments, portraits etc ) his channel is kinda messy but i'd recommend watching his critique videos because, again, he explains concepts very well while maintaining a chill and relaxed attitude, which I think may help alleviate any sort of anger or frustration that often affect new artists (and not only) i apologize if this is not the answer you were looking for but honestly, i can't think of particular videos i can wholeheartedly recommend outside of these channels because they're what I watched myself, and I can only speak from my own experience. And like I said in the beginning, i kinda just don't watch tutorials anymore because they feel repetitive like they're saying the same things i already know and it's boring so i have different ways to learn now If anyone else has any other recommendations for anon please share them with the class!

#ask iztea #oki lied a little bit i have been searching for face tutorials lately #and i can't find anything good damn it #i honestly think it's better to just 'copy' speedpaints or other artists #while watching videos about art fundamentals to actually understand what it is that you're copying #ask iztea: art talk

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screeblees · 1 year ago

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Yandere ! Friend x Reader Headcanons

Aaaaah this is my first time posting what I write here, even if it’s just headcannons omg akjfksnk

I’ve also wrote a domestic scenario about moving in with Yandere! Friend as they convince you to be together, here !

Find my Masterlist here !

Please enjoy!! <33

❥ Yandere ! Friend who you’ve known for longer than anyone else. They have been with you so long that a time before them is quite faded in memory.

❥ Yandere ! Friend who has revolved their entire life around you; past, present and future. They have lied omitted things from their past, stretched truths to be a little more fitting for your view of them, are constantly doing everything they can to be with you at any given opportunity (and push others away). They have chosen the same subjects/classes/lectures as you and shall apply for jobs in the same places and universities as you, all to ensure you’re never too far away from them. If they happen to move house to right across the street in view of your bedroom window and have become an expert in all your interests and excel in your shared classes, that’s just lucky for you, isn’t it?

❥ Yandere ! Friend who knows just what to say to you to get rid of anyone they perceive as coming between you. They know just how to phrase their words, beginning with a light-hearted joke that is said maybe a little too often, until their tone becomes more serious and pressing. Or maybe they overexaggerate instances, trusting your terrible memory and unquestioning trust in them to turn you again their target.

❥ Yandere ! Friend who has little need for violence as their words stab like perfect weapons against their opponent. They are perfectly charismatic when needed and once they have you within their grasp, all they need to do is whisper in your ear to turn you against their perceived rival. Efficiently spreading rumours and stretched truths and using the natural gossip train to spread their effects.

❥ Yandere ! Friend who despite having little need for violence, still has the capabilities for it. Growing stronger so whilst it hurts to be away from you, they know they are still doing something that will help you, as indirectly as it may be. And maybe the added benefit of you gawking over their muscle mass and having an excuse to send pictures of themselves just to be showered in compliments is an added bonus.

❥ Yandere ! Friend who made ‘harmless’ jokes about their obsession and possession of you which were said louder, and more often as the ‘jokes’ evolved over the years, like a frog in boiling water. They know just how to escalate everything at the right speed to catch you, hook, line and sinker. Now they can comfortably express their yandere tendencies with not much more than a blink of an eye, at most receiving an apology when they express how your actions (usually choosing to speak with someone else) effected them, made them jealous upset.

❥ Yandere ! Friend who knows just how to soften you to each and every one of their ideas, fantasies and plans. Starting each idea off as a throwaway thought or joke, day by day talking about it more often, more detailed, more seriously, until it becomes an all but set-in-stone plan. Things you would have never agreed with otherwise are happily nodded along to as you become compliant to their will.

❥ Yandere ! Friend who has became an expert at pulling on the strings of your heart. While you’re the epicentre of theirs, they are the controller of yours. They’ve developed systems of keeping you close, protocols listed in countless (and really, it's an almost countless amount due to the sheer amount they know about you) notebooks dedicated to you and everything they can think of about you. If these notebooks also contain collages of anything from a strand of your hair to printed pictures of the two of you then who’s to know. Any gift you give them is either thoroughly used and well-loved or kept in its box on their bedside table, absolutely nothing in-between.

❥ Yandere ! Friend who is so vocal about their ownership and possession of you that others around you grow concerned. If these thoughts are voiced to either one of you then all hell shall rain down, you dutifully reporting back to your Yandere! Friend, who writes paragraph after paragraph after paragraph on the wrongness of their words, twisting the person into someone so disgustingly unrecognisable, speaking to you on their opinions, starting with offence but growing to disgust with every rant spoken, receiving nothing but support from you as you agree with their every word.

❥ Yandere ! Friend who hates it when you change without their permission. Something like a different hairstyle or hair dye, new piercings, a different style of clothes from usual, or even a new pair of glasses can set them off. Though that usually ends up bringing you closer anyways. They push you away at the sight of said change(s) as you chase after them pleading for forgiveness, or, if you instead leave them alone, then they’ll come around eventually and intimately express how it made them feel, either way it ends in your apologies and the two of you (somehow?) even closer than before.

❥ Yandere ! Friend who in most cases, no matter what you do, they’ll back you up, in their eyes there’s very little you can do wrong, their small amount of morals bending to your will. Anything you do is free of judgement in their eyes, they’ll even go as far as (socially) attacking someone for their criticism of you, lashing at them with their words.

❥ Yandere ! Friend who is naturally gifted at finding your accounts, no matter how anonymous you thought yourself to be. Sometimes they’ll mercifully let you know they’ve found you through a notification left by an account you know they use. They use the contents of these accounts to their advantage, what you think but would never say, what you like but would never admit, what you read but would adamantly deny, all come to light for them to explore other sides of you.

❥ Yandere ! Friend who tests every possible boundary not explicitly stated. You never said they couldn’t touch you like that. You never said they couldn’t leave marks on your skin, whether it be by pen and paint, their nails and hands or their mouth and teeth. You never said they couldn’t cut your name into their skin. But lucky for you by the point they become this extreme, your will has been bent so out of shape that all this possession and obsession only makes you feel happy and safe and loved, which only encourages them to do as they please. There is no normal boundary that will go uncrossed…

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ariaste · 4 months ago

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Hi! Regarding your recent post about how you taught your writing workshops, I was reading through it and was feeling very inspired (you sound amazing as a teacher), but I also really wish I had a community like that. Since I'm currently focusing on an original work, I was wondering how do you go about finding fellow writers/betas that you can trust with work and form a mutual writing relationship with? I've looked for and joined many communities like Nanowrimo and discord servers over the years, yet nothing seemed to click? So yeah sorry for the bother but I was wondering if you had any advice :D

Re: "you sound amazing as a teacher" -- aw thanks! I was an INCREDIBLE teacher. That might sound kind of vain to say with so much assurance, but it truly was the first time in my life where I knew beyond a shadow of a doubt that I was doing a really, really fucking good job. (And that's WITH my anxiety, so like. Oof.) I just set out on purpose to be the kind of teacher I always longed to have when I was an apprentice writer, and that got me most of the way there. The rest was just spite for all the shitty creative writing classes I'd had before LOL. I'd already seen all the mistakes myself from the other side, so I just came up with better ways of doing things. And then day one of class, I had them all do a self-assessment of what they wanted to learn in the class, what fears they had, etc, and I was really struck by how universal the sense of insecurity and under-confidence was in all their replies. So that just confirmed what I already suspected, to wit: my ONE JOB (and again, this was a "writing and publishing scifi/fantasy" class) was just to hammer in the idea of, "Your ideas ARE cool, the things you think are cool ARE IN FACT COOL, you ARE allowed to write about queer dragons or whatever and that's an awesome thing to be doing and I'm HERE FOR IT." If the one thing a student takes from a creative writing class is more confidence in their writing and more trust in themself, then the goal has been achieved. If a teacher says anything else, we're verging on snobbery (Iowa Writer's Workshop can go get fucked btw)

ANYWAY.

Finding a beta you click with is a lot like finding a friend or a romantic partner who you click with. That is: there's a lot of fish in the sea, but not all of them are going to be right for you, and sometimes it takes a while to find that special person. It sounds like you're doing all of the right things, though, so just keep at it.

That said, a couple lifehacks: do NOT talk about your work with the vibes of "hey, i'm looking for a beta, does anyone want to beta for me?" because (at least in my experience) those acquaintances often turn out to be sort of transactional and shallow -- think of people who walk into any situation like "hey will you be my girlfriend? i'm looking for a girlfriend. do you want to date me as my girlfriend??? will someone please be my girlfriend?" rather than trying to make genuine connections with people as *people* versus the role that the girlfriend-seeker wants to put them in. (Exception to this: Fandom-specific servers where you are looking for a beta for a fic. Then it's less weird to ask out loud for a beta, because you've already established a mutual shared interest/passion. It's not cold-calling in the same way, you get me??)

Instead, aim to project vibes of "I'm having so much fun playing in my sandbox :) I am having so much fun by myself, maybe too much fun in fact [psychically broadcasting that the fun is in such abundance around here that there would be enough to share if someone happened to wander past...]" Post about your work, talk about it in public, give people little excerpts or tidbits you're proud of. Look for people who express interest in the sort of fun you're having, and then start up conversations about it. Look for people who are having the sort of fun of their own that you're interested in, compliment them on it and ask questions, and build a relationship. (If they're writing the sort of thing you're into, chances are that you're writing the sort of thing they're into. Not always, but frequently!)

Sometimes it is possible to take an existing friend who is interested in your work (or at least supportive of it and loving of you) and kind of train them into being a great beta reader even if they themselves are not really a writer. It takes a lot of self-knowledge of what you're looking for and what you need in terms of feedback, it takes some patience and trust in your relationship with them, it takes the ability to negotiate boundaries and ask really good questions, and it takes a friend who is game to try and who likes the sort of things you like. (Personal recommendation: Don't try to get feedback from someone who isn't even interested in the genre that you're writing. A dedicated literary fiction fan is probably going to have a REAL hard time appreciating your gruesome scifi horror book for what it is, and if they're not familiar with the genre conventions, their suggestions are predisposed to be kind of Weird and Not Right For What You're Writing. Accept their love and support, but also accept that neither of you are going to have a good time if they try to beta for you.)

Trying to build relationships in an open community like a forum or a Discord server is a good way to cast a wide net, but all deep lasting relationships happen on a single line between you and the other person, so look for opportunities to talk to people one-on-one in DMs to build that kind of creative intimacy.

It takes time! But if you're open about the things that are bringing you joy and you're talking about them and setting them out in plain sight, the right people will eventually be drawn to your joy/fun like moths to a flame. Humans cannot resist that shit.

If you've been doing that and it's still not working, check in with yourself -- is your project actually bringing you joy, or are you going through the motions? Readjust, reorient yourself, try again. Lean into it. Go hard or go home. If you're really truly genuinely having fun by yourself, then your eventual readers will too.

If you're doing all THAT and it's STILL not working (that is, if people are expressing initial interest but you can't hold their attention and they wander off once they read your work), then that's a signal that you've got a tension problem.

GOOD LUCK. You will find your people eventually, just keep going! :)

#writing advice #writing #beta reading

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professional-demon-master · 1 year ago

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Cutting you off 6

Beelzebub

Light angst/ comfort. Good ending !! GN reader (if I make a mistake, please let me know!) Beelzebub x MC

- Beel and Belphie were sometimes one and the same.

- Beel would feel sleepy if Belphie didn’t take his third morning nap, Belphie would get reflux if Beel ate too much spicy food and they both would get cranky if they spent too much time apart.

- But the length of their relationship didn’t stopped there.

- Being twins, they spent most of their time together, sharing a room just reinforced that.

- This gave them plenty of time to express their feelings, thoughts and ideas to the other. Like when Beel talked about his idea of a new sandwich with 205 ingredients or when Belphie would talk about why taking a nap during class should be considered a learning technique.

- This also meant Belphie spent a lot of time unpacking his feelings with Beel.

- They would often talk about what problems they got into with Lucifer, their new shenanigans and, almost inevitably, about their time at the celestial realm. Which would often bring the Lilith topic back into focus.

- What would begin as a soft and melancholic conversation about their fondest memories, more often than not ended with Belphie dumping every awful thought he had about humans.

- And after a Millenia of hearing him, Beel stopped trying to get some reason into Belphie and started questioning himself.

- What if Belphie was right? What if humans actually were malicious creatures? What if they were the ones to blame for what happened to Lilith?

- Beel never talked about it with anyone else, though. He knew what everybody else thought about Belphegor's beliefs.

- And then, the exchange program happened.

- Beel was extremely anxious. Clearly they sent Belphie away for his conflicted, and very clear, feelings concerning humans. And now some human was gonna be entering his life? Sleeping at his home, eating in his house and just…living with him.

- When you arrived he was a little bit confused, though. He never actually went to the human realm unless he was being dragged by Lucifer or any other of his brothers, and when that happened he restrained from meeting humans, so, most of his knowledge of humans was given by the things he would listen, mostly from Belphie.

- So now, seeing you, was confusing. You didn’t looked like the type of being that would hypnotize him to do as you wanted, or the kind of being that was hateful and disgusting.

- You looked… adorable. You had a confusing face, you looked soft and almost emotional looking everywhere while Diavolo and Lucifer explained what you were doing there. He wasn’t sure you were the type of being Belphie spent so many nights cursing and talking back about.

- But, what if this was part of your plan? You wanted to look as innocent as possible to trick him! Surely that was it!

- So for the first weeks he tried to stay as away from you as possible. Mammon was the one in charge of looking out for you, so he didn’t actually needed to be around you.

- But still, has time passed, he started feeling different about humans.

- He watched you many times from afar and you didn’t seemed like an evil being. He would watch you talk with his brothers, trying to befriend them, having a hard time adjusting at the academy and still, having a smile on your face whenever you were out.

- That made it harder for him to keep his distance from you. You tried several times to talk to him, to get a conversation going or to even get a glance from him.

- You would compliment his way of playing fangol, his hair and the way he cooked dinner that day, without getting much more in response than a shy “thanks”. You tried sharing food with him during lunch so you could talk, but he would just take the food as fast as he could and say he needed to be somewhere else.

- Then the whole kitchen incident happened, and Beelzebub HAD to spend time with you, without being able to escape you this time.

- After the whole nightmare talk and sharing words of reassurance with him, you really thought you were making progress, probably even becoming friends. Hell, he even made a pact with you!

- But as soon as you went back to your room, he went back to being completely distant from you.

- After a while you desisted, convinced that Beel didn’t liked you and that despite your efforts, a friendship wasn’t gonna flourish.

- Beel started feeling guilty, but tried to make himself believe that it was all for Belphegor, he was the one who warned him about humans, and why would he lie?

- And despite him being convinced this was how it was gonna work until the end of the exchange program, everything changed after you freed Belphegor.

- He didn’t actually had time to process his feelings while it was all happening, all he knew was that he was now grateful you were there, grateful you freed Belphegor and grateful he made a pact with you.

- But it wasn’t after you died, and came back, that he realized how much he started caring about you.

- You were a good person! Belphegor was completely wrong about humans!

- Even after you were safe and sound, and everyone apologized to you, he kept on feeling guilty. He had avoided you and treated you wrong for so long, without any good reason other than him believing Belphie's stories about humans.

- During a night talk were he unloaded his feelings with Belphie, Belphegor did accept his mistake. “I was wrong. Maybe not all humans were so bad after all” was all he had said before falling asleep.

- But sleep didn’t came for Beelzebub for a long time, and during all that tossing and turning in his bed, he realized one thing: he had to make it right with you.

- The next morning he tried, he really tried to gather up courage and talk with you just like his brothers did, but he kept on choking in his words when he noticed how distant you were from him.

- And who could blame you? He was the one who avoided you for your whole stay there.

- Beelzebub couldn’t help feeling bad when he noticed how everytime he entered a room, you didn’t even acknowledge his presence. Or how when you had the same classes, you avoided sitting next to him. Or worse of all, when you didn’t even comment on his cooking anymore!

- He tried really hard to keep his spirits up though. He would invite you to his fangol games or ask you yo sit next to him in class.

- “Sorry Beelzebub, already have plans with Solomon on Friday afternoon, maybe next game”, “Sorry Beelzebub, I already started working on this project with another demon”, “Sorry Beel, I’m gonna eat lunch with the angels today”

- Sorry sorry sorry sorry

- It wasn’t your fault, he knew this was all his own making, but couldn’t help the feeling of rejection that started in his mouth and made his stomach hurt, it made food taste bad.

- After two weeks of trying and when he was about to give up, he saw his big opportunity. A new pastry shop opened in Devildom! Of course it would be a good excuse to ask you to go out with him, he was the avatar of gluttony after all!

- After a whole day of gathering enough courage, he decided to ask you next morning, since you had the same first class and it was his time of walking you to school.

- The morning was quiet, too quiet, it made him feel nervous. We’re your walks to school always this quite? He never actually noticed before.

“So, uhm, MC” Beelzebub started, both of his hands grabbing the straps of his backpack. “You… like pastries?” What a dumb question, she obviously does! She always asks Luke for his special sweets after all.

You turned your head, a little smile and furrowed brows were plaster in your face, “Yeah, I do”, was all that left your mouth before you turned to look back at the street. “There’s a new pastries' store in town. It’s suppose to be really good”, “really? Sounds interesting”, “I was thinking you and I could check it out, after class. Just if you don’t have any other plans, of course” Beel could feel his palms getting sweaty, the fear of rejection planted in his head. “Oh…” Beel felt his stomach drop as soon as that sound came out in your voice, “Are you sure about that? You can always go with Belphegor, or Asmo, he likes taking pictures of cute desserts” “no!” Beel stopped abruptly, making you do the same, “I mean, that’s nice, but I really would like to spend some time with you”

You exhaled, both hands at your sides and eyes gazing everywhere, except at Beelzebub's stare. “You don’t have to do this, Beel”. Beel's anxiousness turned to confusion, “what do you mean by that?” “Pretending you like me, you really don’t have to do it, we’re okay”, “MC, I don’t understand, why would I pretend to like you?” “Beel, come on. Before everything happened, you could barely be in the same room as me for more than 10 minutes, and now you suddenly want to spend time with me? Right after I rescued Belphegor?” He gave you a puzzled look as you explained “I connected the dots. Really, you don’t have to do this, I was helping Belphie out because I wanted to, you don’t owe me anything”, and with that you turned in your heels, in hopes of getting back on your way to RAD, but a sudden hand on your elbow stopped you. “No, you got it all wrong MC, and it’s my fault”, Beel spoke quietly, you kept your gaze on him, signaling him to continue.

“I don’t want to spend time with you as a way of repaying you, I just wanted to make up for my past actions”, this time you gave him a puzzled expression, your body turned to him to pay close attention to him. “ and I did avoid you at the beginning, but that wasn’t exactly your fault. I just… I spent so much time hearing Belphie talk about how humans were to blame for what happened to Lilith that I think I just internalized it as of it was my own ideology, and you coming here, being nothing but good with us just, made me feel uncomfortable, I guess. You made me realize that what I believed was completely wrong, and that was hard. Belphie is the smartest one between of us two after all” you laughed at that remark, “I’m just so sorry. I know I wasn’t the best at the beginning, but I do like being with you, MC, and I wanna make it right, if you want to, of course.” His gaze softened, “I’ve already missed most of your time here, I would hate to not make emends before your time here runs out”.

You looked at Beel’s violet eyes, nothing but pure sincerity and regret were shown. “It’s going to take a lot of time to work on our relationship Beel” you could notice the sudden change of emotions, brows furrowed in a sad tone. “But I think that a café visit is a great start”.

You could practically see the light in his eyes sparkle after you accepted his invitation. A smile painted both your faces, “we should get to RAD soon though, Lucifer will make sure to keep us occupied with a punishment if we miss first period.

“Oh, yeah, I forgot about that” Beel’s cheeks turned to a pink undertone while he let go of your arm and started walking by your side again, mood completely changed, happiness radiating from both of you.

- You sighed, looking at Beel while he started talking about everything he wanted to order at the cafe when you get there. “Of course he turns into a sunshine just like that. He’s practically a puppy”

Hope you guys liked it! I did took a different approach with this one bc I found hard to believe that Beel would actually hurt you consciously.

#obey me mc #obey me scenarios #obey me angst #shall we date beelzebub #beelzebub avatar of gluttony

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manynarrators · 4 months ago

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Drag Queen IWTV AU

(I get it’s a bit crack, but in my defence I spent a lot of last week talking about drag queens in class!)

The House de Romanus

Started by Marius. Armand was the first person to join alongside, and he was very young. In his late teens-early 20s, just before Lestat comes on scene, he falls into a bit of a toxic relationship with Santino. His entire aesthetic changes dramatically, and somewhat incidentally it’s Lestat (brought into the fold by Magnus, spends a few months as someone just hanging around, before he’s taken in by Marius) who brings him back to the House de Romanus.

They’ve spent years sharing a dressing room. They trust each other implicitly, you have never seen two people who hate each other quite as much, and yet love each other in the way of family.

Lestat’s gone through half a dozen different aesthetics, but has an absolutely electric stage presence. Armand, meanwhile, has a much more classic lounge singer meets Hollywood glam look, and is iconic for it. (This specific persona really started to develop with Santino though it’s undergone some major refinement). While a less talented stage presence, absolutely killing it in still photos.

Lestat meets Louis, and brings him in. Louis comes with Daniel, who, somewhat immediately is drawn in by Armand. He does a lot of the behind the scenes stuff for a lot of them. It takes a long time for Louis to have the confidence to go on stage, but even before that, he’s consistently there.

The relationship dynamics are not any less complex, they might actually be worse.

(If anyone else has ideas please toss them my way! I feel like there is absolutely more that could be added, but these are my rough ideas).

#amc iwtv #iwtv #amc interview with the vampire #interview with the vampire #the vampire armand #armand #lestat de lioncourt #marius de romanus #louis de pointe du lac #daniel molloy #mute the sound|out of character #lesmand #armandstat #loustat

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our-magical-world · 5 months ago

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Questions for MHA shifters

My Hero Academia is one of my main DRs and I always enjoy reading / listening to MHA shifters talk about their experiences there, it gives me so much motivation and it's usually super interesting.

So I thought about some questions I'd like to ask experienced shifters about their MHA DRs. Just random things I'm curious about. If you've shifted there and would like to answer (just for fun, feel free to skip any questions you're not comfortable with!) please reblog with your answers, or make a new post and tag me so I can read it. (You can also answer if you haven't shifted, based on your script and ideas, just let us know at the beginning).

1- First, are you a student or a pro hero / teacher / adult?

2- Mandatory question: What's your quirk?? Do you have any special moves?

3- Are you related to any canon characters? (as family or previous relationships like childhood friends, rivals...)

4- Any non-canon characters we haven't seen in the series who are part of your life? (like siblings, scripting your CR friends in there, or having children in your DR)

5- Do you have a crush? Are you in a relationship? or even better, love triangles? relationship drama? I want the tea (only if you're comfortable with sharing, of course!)

6- Did you make any changes to canon? (if you changed too many things, you can just mention a few interesting ones that made your experience very different from canon)

7- Did you script anything or make any changes to canon that didn't turn out as you expected? (as in what seemed like a small change turned out to change the story drastically)

8- Did you meet (or fight) the villains? How was it?

9- Is All Might as impressive as they say in person? (if you met him in muscle form)

For students:

10- Who are your best friends?

11- Did you replace anyone in class 1-A? (or B?) I've seen many people do this so the number of students stays even. Who did you script out?

12- Did you script Mineta out? Or change his personality? If you didn't, did you have any problems with him (especially if you're a girl)? Anyone (else) you scripted out or changed drastically?

13- I've seen way too many shifters say that Momo tends to start drama for no reason in their DRs and I'm a little concerned... was she like that in your DR?

14- What's your daily schedule at UA? Did you script your own schedule/timetable? Any subjects you love or hate?

15- Has anyone seen Bakugo's room or Tsuyu's room? They're the only ones that weren't shown in the series (Mineta's was described in the light novel), I'm curious to know how they decorated them!

For shifters who aren't students anymore:

16- Are you a pro hero? A teacher? A civilian? A villain?

17- What's your daily life like?

18- Who do you work with? Do you have your own agency? Sidekicks?Any interesting team-ups with other heroes?

19- Anything we should know about hero work?

Bonus: 20- Any embarrassing moments to confess? (you can do it anonymously if you want!)

21- Free spot: That's all I can think of right now, but feel free to include anything you want to share! You can also submit your own questions for other shifters and I'll add them to the post or create a new one.

THANKS!!

#mha shifting #bnha shifting #shiftblr #reality shifting #desired reality #shifting community #mha shifters #bnha shifters #shifting to my hero academia

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hughiecampbelle · 1 year ago

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Random Headcanons About Baby Roy:

Warning/s: addiction, addiction mention, drugs, alcohol mention

A/N: I think about Baby Roy all the time, lol. I just love them. I thought some fun headcanons would be nice :) Based on these headcanons and this fic series!

Baby loves screamo. Anything and everything screamo. Also any alternative artist! The more raunchy, the better. Any car or room they're in, they're listening to it or humming it or playing it in their headphones. Everyone's come to expect it and ignore it as best they can. Especially Karl and Frank, they hate it. Gerri just shrugs. it's not hurting you or anyone else, leave it be

It absolutely drives Connor insane, especially when you and Roman gang up on him and recite verses. Roman doesn't love your music, but it's so worth it to watch your other siblings cringe and get all uncomfortable

"That d*ick tastes like yankee candl-" I love Ashnikko lol

"Y/n, please."

"You wanna hear a so-"

"No."

Baby unironically plays Where's My Juul?? by Lil Mariko in front of Connor who has no idea what a juul actually is lol

Baby has a wicked sweet tooth. Kendall's been sneaking them candy since they were little, but it seems like you always have something sweet. A lollipop, gumballs, gummy bears, etc.

"You'll get a cavity."

"This is my one vice, let me be."

Shiv is always holding out her hand for whatever you've got. She doesn't ask, she just expects it. You never mind, it's nice to share with her. Besides, it makes her feel like a little kid, too

Baby loves gory movies. Growing up, when all the kids were together, they'd have movie night. When it was your turn, you always chose the goriest thing you could find. Rome would sit with his hands over his eyes and Connor would hold a pillow, But you, Ken, and Shiv would be totally into it

"Just wait! His head gets ripped off!"

"This can't be appropriate."

Baby is actually very smart. Despite all the partying, their grades were perfect. Logan had no need to worry. Maybe you weren't showing up to class, but you were there for tests and that's all that mattered. You throw your intelligence in your brothers faces

"Can you even spell egotistical?"

You make endless jokes about your sobriety that none of them like except for Roman. The others shoot daggers at you with a look that says "not funny" You think it's funny though, and that's all that matters

"I'll be at the bar, you guys chat. Kidding! I was kidding, jeez."

"Does anyone else need a strong drink right about now?"

"They say the food is like crack, but I know crack and this isn't that."

"I used to take handfuls of pills to this song. Now look at me, I've become a monster."

Connor is horrified. Every time you say anything, he's speechless. Shiv gets very serious and Kendall spirals, but Rome likes it. If you can't joke about it, what good is it?

Baby has lots of tattoos and piercings. It's the only socially acceptable way to self harm that isn't drugs and alcohol. Logan hates them and Connor thinks they're unsightly, but you don't really care. Gerri always wants to see the new ones you got, though she prefers they be covered up in the office

"I like that one, that one's very cute."

"Thanks, Mommy."

She hates when you call her that. For you, your and Gerri's relationship, it's not at all sexual like it is with Roman. She is genuinely your mother figure. She is warm and caring and only wants the best from you. She can always tell when things are getting bad again

"Oh honey, you don't look so good."

"Mommy, I don't feel so good."

She really does love you. Someone has to. She knows your mother and Logan don't. Someone has to be there for you

Both Karl and Frank are afraid of you. Between the music, the addictions, the tattoos, the piercings, everything is intimidating to them. You're not competing like your siblings, that scares them the most. You want nothing to do with the company

"Think they're rabid?"

"Might be."

You love it, the way they always back away when you get too close, like you're demonic or infected

Baby, I think, would write a lot. Not just your feelings, which are so hard to put into words, but good things that happened, reasons to stay sober

You have a notebook or something that they use to write in. You've brought it to every rehab you've ever been to and constantly reread it over and over. No one knows about it, and if they notice, they don't bring it up. It's yours

Reasons To Stay Sober: Connor, Kendall, Shiv, Rome. Connor, Kendall, Shiv, Rome. Connor, Kendall, Shiv, Rome. Connor, Kendall, Shiv. . .

You have a sobriety birthday and every month you bake a cake. It always turns out shitty, lopsided, and burned and runny at the same time, but decorating it makes you feel like a kid again

You're always wearing your siblings clothes. You're always stealing someone's jacket or socks or shirt or sweater. You like it. It makes you feel close to them

They've just come to expect it

"You look better in that shirt than I do, keep it."

"I was going to anyways."

You have those moments of deep regret and embarrassment and self-consciousness that always end up in tears, but your siblings are there to pick up the pieces

Connor especially will just hold you as long as you need and listen to everything you have to get out

You feel so deeply sorry for hurting them and scaring them so much. You just wanted it to stop. You wanted not to he angry anymore

They tell you they understand, but you know they don't. Not really. They can't unless they've felt the way you have

Baby falls asleep on all the siblings. Even Roman will let them get away with it, but no one else. You snuggle into them and have the best sleep of your life

"Quit moving."

"Don't use me as a pillow, then."

You get away with (mostly) everything because you're their baby and they love you so much. They love you so much it's gross

Connor still prides himself on the way he raised you. There were bumps in the road, but you ended up perfect. Absolutely perfect

They all pride themselves on how they raised you. It wasn't always good, they weren't always there, but they're making up for all that now. Logan is gone. Slowly they're breaking the cycle, for you and for them

Things will get better. You've hit rock bottom so many times and always found a way out. This is that. This is your out

#headcanon #connor roy #connor roy x reader #connor roy headcanon #kendall roy #kendall roy x reader #kendall roy headcanon #shiv roy #shiv roy x reader #shiv roy headcanon #roman roy #roman roy headcanon #roman roy x reader #succession #succession headcanon #succession x reader

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v1nuswrites · 6 months ago

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Chapter Two: Fakers

-------˖⁺. ༶ ❤︎ ⋆˙⊹ 𐦍 ˖⁺. ༶ ❤︎ ⋆˙⊹-------

Summary: https://www.tumblr.com/v1nuswrites/749849029310021632/all-my-unconditional-love-carina-x?source=share

Please read the summary before continuing with this fic ^^

Chris x female! OC

Chapters: Part One

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It was the first day of senior year and Carina felt like being sick. She had never done well with stress, not even in childhood. The only thing she could think to do to help ease her mind was paint.

She would have to wait for the triplets to come and pick her up since Soren went much earlier that morning with his own friends to football practise, leaving no room for her in the car. It was clear he was doing his best to stay far away from her.

Carina told herself she didn't mind. Besides, she liked going with the triplets, especially since she knew Chris wouldn't be there this time as he would also be training for football.

-------˖⁺. ༶ ❤︎ ⋆˙⊹ 𐦍 ˖⁺. ༶ ❤︎ ⋆˙⊹-------

A loud honk outside of her house let her know Matt was here. She finished scrubbing her hands and ran to the door, not wanting to keep him and the others waiting.

She smiled as she got into the car and sat in her normal seat across from Matt who was in the driver's seat.

"How are you feeling?" Matt asked as he looked down at her paint covered hands. Only Matt would know her hands were an easy way to see how Carina was feeling. When she was stressed or upset, her hands would become splattered with paint, pen and whatever else she chose to use. He knew art was her only escape from stress.

"I'm okay now" Carina reassured, looking down at Matts hands which were his telltale sign too. As soon as he felt angry, stressed, or upset the area around his fingernails would begin to scab from where where he would pick them. Luckily, there was nothing there. Carina smiled at that small relief, his calmness rubbing off on her.

"Seniors baby!" Nick practically screamed in excitement from the back, making Carina jolt. She nearly forgot him, Luca and Maya were also here.

"This is going to be the best year I can feel it already!" Maya exclaimed, always the positive one. Matt, Luca and Carina joined in on their cheering, bouncing off their excited energy.

As Carina turned to look out the car window, she realised she was directly in front of it, Matt having not driven off yet.

Their tree.

Her cheering suddenly died down. Matt drove past it almost agonisingly slow. She didn't blame him though, he didn't know. It was the one secret she had kept from him throughout all these years.

-------˖⁺. ༶ ❤︎ ⋆˙⊹ 𐦍 ˖⁺. ༶ ❤︎ ⋆˙⊹-------

As they all got out of the car, Chris and Soren were walking back from their football practise, sweaty and pink faced. Soren clearly spotted them and Carina looked into his deep brown eyes as he gave their group a small wave. He avoided her gaze and parted from Chris, making his own way to class. A sudden jolt of sadness hit Carina as she began to realise they would never be the same as before.

"Hey" Chris greeted everyone, except for Carina. Obviously.

"Do you guys hear something?" Carina said sarcastically, looking him in the eyes to make her point. His eyebrows creased in an annoyed expression.

"Remember you guys are meant to be 'dating' " Maya whispered harshly at both of them as she grabbed both of their hands, connecting them.

"You have art together first period right? Walk there together" Maya suggested, clearly not understanding just how deep their hatred for each other ran.

"This is ridiculous" Chris muttered, seething. But he didn't let go instantly like Carina thought he would.

"Don't let yourself get any ideas okay? If this wasn't some ridiculous dare, i'd chop my hand off before it touched you." Chris whispered in a harsh tone to Carina. She just ignored him, purposefully tightening her grip on his hand to the point she knew it must be hurting him.

"Has anyone ever told you that you have unusually sweaty hands?" Carina spoke loudly enough for those around them in the hallway to hear, gritting her teeth and scrunching up her nose.

"Like seriously ... You should get that checked out-" Carina went on, but suddenly she was cut off by a foot coming in front of her, tripping her up.

Chris, of course.

"Whoops" He said as he continued walking, not even sparing a glance in her direction. A flurry of curse words entered her mind as he walked away.

"Well, That failed." Nick sighed, turning towards Maya, Luca and Matt.

"Dramatically." Maya added. Even Luca nodded In agreement.

-------˖⁺. ༶ ❤︎ ⋆˙⊹ 𐦍 ˖⁺. ༶ ❤︎ ⋆˙⊹-------

When Carina finally got to her art class, she was late. She silently blamed Chris. She wasn't too worried about her teacher, Miss Thompson, being mad at her though. They had become quite close over the years considering how much time Carina spent in the art studios.

The classroom was set with a circle of easels in the middle of the room, a range of other art equipment surrounding the rest of the class. Everything you could think of creating could be made within the art studios, and Carina never got bored of the excitement she felt when she entered.

Looking for the easel and chair with her name on, Carina found she was placed across the room from where Chris was sat, a small miracle.

"Please paint or create whatever you would like," Miss Thompson said happily. "Today is for experimentation! Allow yourselves to get back into a creative mindset"

"You'll have three days to complete this experimental piece, and after this, you'll be working in pairs for a project which will make up a large part of your final grade." She reminded the class gently.

Carina didn't think much about the project, knowing she wouldn't have a tough time finding a partner considering practically everyone in the school knew how much she loved art. She didn't bother to look at the worried expression on Chris' face at this news.

By the end of class, Carina looked at the rough outline she had made for her piece. Without her being aware, she had painted an outline of two hands reaching out to each other, close to touching but ultimately not being able to reach each other.

She grimaced as she turned it away from her, reminders of earlier infiltrating her thoughts without permission.

-------˖⁺. ༶ ❤︎ ⋆˙⊹ 𐦍 ˖⁺. ༶ ❤︎ ⋆˙⊹-------

A/N: Chapter two! This fic is a little slow to start, but I hope you'll enjoy the journey with me! Thanks so much for reading, the support means the world to me :) <3

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lovelyyandereaddictionpoint · 2 years ago

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Crewle daughter made lunch for ( Ruggie, Silver, Deuce, Azul, Epel, Kamil, and Idia ) to try out as she have cooking class in the princess school and wanted them to be the first to try them out as it's the first time she makes beef Wellington, butter bread, and steamed veggies

Since she not too confident about her cooking something difficult but in the end her food tased good

( I'm a big foodie and what way to get friendship is by food )

Cooking Lunch | Yandere Twisted Wonderland x Restoration Crewel Daughter Reader

The sentiment to share something with your friends is there but the lack of confidence in your work would not be. OG crewel daughter is confident in everything she does because she’s just that good (As her father says so). If she wanted to have her friends taste her cooking she’d do it without any fear or insecurity.

“I know it’s good because I made it.”

Now Restoration daughter isn’t as sure as the original. Her expertise is in restoring, building, and architecture not cooking. And since your not as…outspoken as the original it’d make plenty of sense that you’d turn to your Night Raven friends:

Ruggie Bucci

“So...What do you think?”

“What do I think? I think you should make me lunch more often!”

He’s not just saying that to be encouraging

He genuinely would like you to make this for him during lunch

Especially if your going to sit there staring at him

Means your not running off somewhere feeding someone else

That’s good, means he doesn’t have to force others to throw it away

“Mmmm this wellington makes me want to marry you.”

“Whoa really?”

“Yeah so does your smile but this helps.”

Silver

“Is it…good?”

“Yes. It’s very good. Did you make anymore?”

“Oh uh yeah but I was going to give it to–”

“Thank you for the food.”

He doesn’t mean to hog your food

He does

He just was so hungry from napping he’s practically still half-asleep

And that will be what happens whenever you bring more for your other friends

Silver tiredly ate through all that you made this time and the next

But if you haven’t eaten yet no worries

You can have his lunch

But it seems his half a sleep self just won’t let anyone else taste anymore of your goodness

“Let’s exchange lunches next time you come to visit.”

Deuce Spade

“This is–! Amazing! As usual but still, this is really good!”

“Th-thanks!”

He’s digging in with a blush on his face

He’s hardly getting past the thought that you made something that’s becoming a part of him

He might take the opportunity to return the favor

But he’s just so happy that you’ve come to him

It makes all the things that’s the exact opposite of what honor students should do super worth it

“N-next time I’ll feed you! I doubt it’ll be as good but I’ll try!”

Azul Ashengrotto

“You…want me to try this?”

“Y-yeah it’s for a class…so?”

“I-i would put it in the Monstro Lounge!”

“R-really!?”

He’s trying his hardest not to let his mind wander

As he breaks his diet for you

By the way what he said was a lie

He wouldn’t want any but him having access to food you’ve toiled over

If you really still don’t believe he likes it though he has an idea

“How about a contract? Just something that promises that I get your delicious creations while your here, and anyone else who partakes in them is at my disposal”

Epel Felmier

“Mmmm! Mmmm! It’s really good but I’m sure my lunch I will fill you better!”

“A-as if! I’ll show you right now!”

He loves it when you cook and he’s happy to be eating it

But he thinks it only fair if he’s filling up on you you’re creation you should be filled up on his

So eat his apples and whatever he grew into them

“Whoa you looked like you enjoyed it! I did to!”

Kamil Al Asim

“WAAH SO GOOD! You should make more for dinner later!”

“B-but I have to g-go home before–”

“PLEASE ITS SO DELICIOUS!”

He’s insistent that it become part of the regular dishes he feasts on

Not because he likes the food specifically It’s because its made by you

And everything made by you is delicious

So delicious he has no choice but to make you make it for him all the time

You can take a break from restoring can’t you

So you can spend more time with him

“Next time I want to make it with you! I bet you look so cute when you’re focused.”

Idia Shroud

“W-what!? Y-you’re not supposed to be making Waifu moves until level 70!”

“H-huh?”

“Er–y-you made this, right? I-I promise to eat all of it. BYE!”

He regretfully will retreat back to his room before you can witness this man lose his mind over it

He drools over it

He squeals while pointing

And he’s letting the infamous scenario play in his mind as he takes a bite

“ ‘Would you like dinner? Or a bath? Or me? Keeee! Just like that! I can’t believe that’ll be us in a few years! I can hardly wait!”

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traumasurvivors · 1 year ago

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hi april! I just wanted to pop in and let you know that what you’re doing is something special: running all these resources and just communicating and offering help to other trauma survivors is just incredible really and I just hope you’re having a lovely day wherever you are. I reached out to your blog last year and have made sure to stay up to date on any posts or advice you share and it led me to realize I actually would like to pursue a career in psychology. I just started classes and while I’m excited to be here, I realize I’m having difficulty focusing and paying attention despite wanting to do the work. would you have any tips or other sources that might be helpful for me right now? I plan to remove most social media since it seems to be a big contributing factor in my lack of focus, but what else could work? thank you!

Hi anon!

I really struggled with staying focused in school as a result of my ADHD.

Some things that helped me were:

Finding study buddies. Finding people to do work with and study with was super motivating and helpful! Even if it was an online friend and we did our work at the same time so we felt together.

Making my study space welcoming and nice. I put pretty decor on it and made it feel mine. I put little treats in the top drawer so that I could have them as I studied. I put scented candles in I could light and just overall made it a nice aesthetic. Some people find gentle music helps them focus. (Not me personally, but I’ve heard from some people it really does!)

I’d also buy myself some stickers I loved and as I finished things, I’d get to “place” my sticker either on my notebook, binder or even laptop.

Found a routine. I don’t just mean a daily routine but a study routine. I’d make myself a nice warm cup of tea as I was about to settle in and it was the sort of thing that made homework seem relaxing and nice.

Keep track of my progress. I created an excel spreadsheet where I input all my assignments, readings, etc. and I’d mark the percentage I’d completed. I set it to be colour coded so that I felt motivated to make it get to 100% and go green.

Here’s an example.

This isn’t my own, but one I made for a friend when she saw my idea and really liked it. She also found it motivating. This was the end of semester so things were mostly 0% or 100% at this point. During the semester, she’d do things like mark 1% for completing a title page even because it felt super motivating and made it feel like progress. And then also increasing the progress percentage with each step/page/etc in an assignment. (Like if she wrote 4 pages of a 5 page essay, she might label it as 75% to keep in mind that she had one more page but also a final edit to do.) Seeing it climb really helped as she updated it along the way. She also really loved the “stars” I added every time it hit 100% in progress on something. A basic one might just have the assignment, due date and progress.

I found visually seeing my progress made me want to keep making it.

Set a timer. I recommend this for cleaning stuff but telling myself I’m only going to do work for ten minutes makes it easier to start and sometimes once I’m going, I end up on a roll and don’t want to stop.

Colour code notes. I loved getting to use different coloured pens or highlighters when I took notes. It made me more excited about it.

I’m super drained today, so I don’t have much else to add but I kind of want to write a post on this soon and compile more ideas. If anyone has sources they can add to this ask, please do!

#tw grade mention #grades #school #tw school

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liberxi · 5 months ago

Note

We will be waiting faithfully, in case you are ready to share three ideas with us…

Alright, since you asked (and since I like talking about my writing way too much haha) I’m going to share some of my thoughts about the future of the 12th grade AU. All of them contradict each other and neither of them will ever be written, so please keep in mind that they are not canon in any way. Every reader’s guess is as valid as mine, so if you decide to read this, don’t let it influence your own headcanon! Also, given the fic this is obvious, but there is a discussion of sexual themes under the cut.

SCENARIO A: The Toxic One

Gerard and Frank actually move in together when they go to college as planned.

Things seem to be better now, because Gerard is more stable being away from his family and the peer pressure of his old friend group.

However, he still relies heavily on outside validation, because he is very insecure, which means he easily jumps on positive attention. It only takes a couple of weeks until he cheats on Frank for the first time.

Frank is obviously heart broken, but we all know that Gerard can be extremely convincing. He doesn’t even try to act remorseful, but tells Frank honestly that he loves him and that the sex with others doesn’t mean anything, which – in a way – is true. He talks Frank into opening their relationship, and Frank agrees, because they just moved in together and all of his plans for the immediate future hinge on Gerard and he is not ready to give up on it, and he knows that what they have is special and he knows that at least Gerard won’t leave him. He also knows that the relationship will be a lot more open on Gerard’s end than on his own.

Their relationship continues and it’s definitely still rocky. Gerard has a hard time fitting in at college, making friends, keeping up with his classes, etc. and he naturally takes his anger out on Frank. He is not as violent anymore though, so Frank accepts that as an improvement.

After a while on campus, Frank actually starts making friends, specifically other queer kids. In a way, he has an easier time fitting in at college than Gerard does and Gerard kind of resents him for it. Frank strikes up his first good friendship with another gay guy and there might be a bit of sexual tension between them, too, and he does his best to keep his friendship secret from Gerard, because he knows even though they are technically open, he will be punished for it. Even if Gerard won’t outright say so, he’ll make Frank feel bad about it and he’ll find other excuses to take his anger out on him.

One day they meet though and Frank is convinced he’ll be punished, but instead Gerard is the most charming motherfucker imaginable. He ends up actually seducing Frank’s friend into a threesome that leaves Frank feeling miserable. Afterwards, he acts all innocent like “I thought you liked him and I was doing you a favour!”, but Frank knows that it’s actually punishment and that Gerard simply won’t allow him to have anything of his own, because he wants Frank to be completely dependent on him.

Later Frank finds out that Gerard has stayed in touch with his friend behind his back and is hurt again, but Gerard immediately breaks it off in a “see, I would do anything for you, I’ll never talk to that guy again only so you’ll feel better!” way.

Frank’s friend actually approaches Frank to inquire about Gerard, because even though they only hooked up briefly, he noticed that Gerard is into power play and he’s worried about Frank. But after the threesome, things are so awkward between them, that Frank can’t be open with him and gets pretty defensive on Gerard’s behalf. Because it’s one thing for him to be critical of Gerard, but he doesn’t feel like anyone else has that right, because they don’t know him the way Frank does.

Frank’s friends start worrying about him more and plan an intervention. Things between him and Gerard have been so tense lately, that Frank is close to breaking down and asking for help, but then Gerard sends him the sweetest, filthiest message and when his friends see it, they conclude that Gerard is actually a lot different around Frank than around anyone else, open and vulnerable and they conclude they don’t have to worry about him. And Frank doesn’t know how to explain that Gerard actually knew exactly what he was doing with that message and that he uses his vulnerability to manipulate, but he can’t say any of that without sounding paranoid.

So he goes home to where Gerard is waiting for him all sweet and welcoming. And Frank realises he will never let him go. He will always give Frank just enough love and tenderness to make it impossible for him to leave, because he needs Frank, because Frank is the only one who can handle him at his worst. And Frank makes his peace with that, because it might not be the love he deserves, but at least it means Gerard will never leave him either.

Now, this story is pretty dark and I trashed it before even finishing the original fic, because I felt like it did not do justice to the character growth they already underwent. What would have interested me in this plot is mostly the interaction with outsiders to a toxic relationship. In 12th grade, Frank is already an outsider without much of a support system to being with and therefore an easy target. So I was interested in exploring the ways in which Gerard would make sure that he would stay isolated as they changed their social environment in college. But again, while I think that is an interesting question, the fic itself already outgrew that scenario.

SCENARIO B: The (Relatively) Healthy One

This one would be set about two years into the future, during which they didn’t stay in touch at all. Frank has gone through a lot of therapy and he has a boyfriend now, with whom he is in a healthy and stable relationship. He has some trouble with intimacy, but his boyfriend is very understanding about it.

Then pretty surprisingly, he runs into Gerard at some art school exhibition one of his friends is participating in. Gerard is rather shy, but Frank immediately pulls him in for a hug. He feels ridiculously relieved to see Gerard and it just feels right to be close to him again and he knows that’s messed up, but it’s like he has become this big scary thing in his past that he kept running from and facing Gerard actually makes him feel safe, because he no longer has to be scared of just that, and it’s all very messy and complicated.

They sneak out for a smoke and have a very honest conversation. Although they haven’t spoken in so long, Frank feels like they still have this thing going on where they can just be open with each other, because they get each other. Gerard asks him honestly if he messed Frank up, because he’s been worried about that all this time. Frank tells him just as honestly that it’s difficult in his relationship, because he tends to get panic attacks, especially during physical intimacy. It’s the first time they actually use words for what happened between them. At the end of 12th grade, they are both able to finally acknowledge the abuse that took place, but they still don’t call it that. This has changed now, at least Frank is more open about it, and although it obviously pains Gerard, he makes a point out of listening, because he owes that much to Frank.

After that, they also reflect on the more positive aspects of their relationship and they talk about their regrets. Frank says that he regrets not telling Gerard that he loved him at a point where he might have said it back and Gerard tells him that he probably wouldn’t have said it back anyway, even though that’s how he felt. He also confesses that he regrets never eating Frank out and Frank gets really flustered by that. Gerard asks if he even likes it and Frank owns up that he doesn’t know because he never tried before and they end up talking about his sex life some more. He admits that part of the problems with his boyfriend are due to his ptsd, but that his boyfriend is pretty vanilla at the same time and that it bothers him. He always liked Gerard’s rough treatment and just because he’s been through some shit doesn’t mean he is unable to decide what he can handle now. Gerard is absolutely scandalised that anyone would have the chance to give it to Frank good and just not do it and that gets Frank even more flustered.

He invites Gerard to a gig he is playing soon, but Gerard tells him that he doesn’t really want to see him. He confesses that he can’t stop thinking about kissing Frank and he doesn’t want to try being his friend when Frank has a good relationship going on and it might just complicate things. Frank is sad, but he has to admit that Gerard has a point, because he is also attracted to him in a way he does simply not feel with his boyfriend.

They part, but a week later, Gerard shows up to his gig anyway. Frank realises how much he has changed. He is no longer the centre of attention in his friend group, but fades into the background and seems more shy, but also a lot calmer in general. He’s actually wearing a skirt to the concert, showing that he’s more comfortable with expressing himself these days and less worried about people’s opinions of him. He tells Frank that he changed his mind and that he did want to support him as a friend and not stay out of his life for selfish reasons.

Frank asks him to come along drinking with his friends and things quickly turn awkward, because they stay so close to each other and clearly have such an intense chemistry that everyone mistakes Gerard for Frank’s boyfriend and Frank constantly has to go “ahaha, no, that’s my ex actually, my boyfriend is over there”.

It’s clear that the situation isn’t feasible in the long run, but they try to become friends. They hang out a lot and tell each other stuff very honestly. Other than Frank, who really craved a stable and supportive relationship after what happened with Gerard, Gerard has decided that he’d be better off on his own. He’s sleeping around occasionally though and tells Frank about it, which basically drives Frank crazy with jealousy and want. He’s so head over heels for Gerard again, that he eventually breaks up with his boyfriend.

He basically just wants to jump Gerard’s bones immediately, but Gerard insists that they take it slow. They actually go on a couple of dates and do the actual dating thing they never got to do in high school when things were so messed up. Eventually, they sleep with each other and it isn’t vanilla at all, but very consensual and Frank finally feels good about what they have.

This one is the healthiest take, since they actually become friends first and learn to communicate instead of trying to solve everything through sex. They also acknowledge everything that went wrong in the past and are both relatively stable, even though it’s clear that Frank has found his footing a bit better at college, where he has picked up music again and build a solid friend circle. Gerard is more at terms with himself, but also more introverted and clearly still depressed. It’s still something that they share though and that makes their relationship so genuine.

SCENARIO C: The Dramatic One

This one follows a three-act structure with 12th Grade being the first part! The second part is set about two years into college and follows a similar premise as Scenario B. They run into each other again after not having had contact in all this time and the attraction is instantly mutual again. Gerard is now in his Black Parade era.

Frank has carved out a nice life for himself at college, build up a friend circle and he is sharing an apartment with Ray, who is not too happy to see Gerard back in his life again. Gerard on the other hand is still quite unstable.

Gerard has gotten heavily into the bdsm scene in the meantime, and he specifically explored his own submissive side more. He’s actually quite hesitant to get back into it with Frank, because he doesn’t trust himself. During their first times together, he gets Frank off, but keeps his own clothes on. Later, they start exploring things more, and especially when Gerard is upset, he asks Frank to hurt him. Their dynamic is definitely different now and Gerard has learned a lot about consent in the meantime. They both switch, but their sex can mostly be described as consensual, but not safe or sane. Ray will often enough come home to noises that make him believe his apartment will one day be an actual murder scene, but he gave up on trying to fix whatever messy thing they have going on.

Whatever it is, their sex life is actually bomb, but that’s pretty much the best thing about their relationship. Gerard is struggling with a serious drinking problem. It doesn’t turn him violent, but often enough, he’ll just pass out next to Frank. He still does that thing where he tries to run away from his problems, he switches courses, projects, friend groups, etc. Sometimes, he will also just disappear for days or even weeks at a time, but Frank has learned to know that he’ll blow up if he doesn’t let him go and he always comes back. They fight a lot and although their fights aren’t violent, neither of them is especially happy in the relationship.

They try to take a desperate road trip together like old times to patch things up, but they have to accept that they aren’t really able to help each other. Gerard gets a scholarship for an art program in a different part of the country and he takes it, running once again and hoping that things will get better elsewhere. They break off all contact.

The third part is set about 10 years after 12th grade. Frank has been in a happy, stable relationship for years and just got engaged to his boyfriend. There is just one problem. That last, desperate road trip he and Gerard took when they were 20 to fix their relationship? Yep, they got hitched in Vegas and never bothered to get a divorce.

Frank now has to explain to his fiancé that he needs to get a divorce first and at first, he is amused. But then he figures who Frank is married to and starts freaking out a little. The thing is, Frank has told him about his first love Gerard and all the good times they had together. He also told him about the abuse he experienced in high school and the messed up relationship he had in college. He had, however, never made it clear that those people were in fact all one and the same. His fiancé is naturally questioning Frank’s sanity, because how could he be so fond of someone who hurt him that badly?

Anyway, Frank is dead set on getting married and leading a happy life with his boyfriend, who is nice and boring and stable. He has no idea how to contact Gerard, who just disappeared from his life, but he manages to get in touch with Mikey, who tells him that Gerard is now living in LA as a comic book artist. He is very nervous about calling Gerard, but he does and it’s surprisingly easy to explain the situation and Gerard doesn’t make it a big deal. He promises to come up to New York soon to sign the papers.

They meet at a diner. Gerard is now in his Danger Days era and Frank is quite honestly blown away, but hey, he is engaged! He hands the papers to Gerard, who is very nonchalant about it and wants to sign them immediately, pointing out how they were just kids and all that, and Frank is hurt that it seems to mean so little to him. So he calls Gerard out on it and asks him to not act that indifferent. Obviously neither of them got the divorce so far, because they were still kind of attached to each other and weren’t able to let go of the last thing connecting them. And Gerard puts down the pen and is like “you are right, Frankie, I do care. Let me meet him at least before I sign, so I can tell you are in good hands”.

Frank is hesitant but also kind of relieved about the delay, so he asks Gerard to come home with him to introduce him to his fiancé. And obviously, this is where things go to shit. Gerard is charming and a flirt and Frank’s fiancé is kind of into him and takes the whole thing a bit too lightly, half joking that they were married after all and that maybe they’d feel better about letting it go if they banged it out one last time. He definitely noticed the tension between Frank and Gerard, but clearly didn’t expect to set off an explosion.

Frank and Gerard start fighting immediately. Frank’s fiancé is shocked, because he doesn’t understand that for them, arguing and violence and sex are weirdly tangled up and he thinks he actually triggered something dangerous. Their fight is really just a struggle for dominance though and Gerard quickly gets the upper hand. They did this so much in college that they easily fall back into it and Frank basically goes under deep pretty much instantly. His fiancé freaks out, because he’s never seen Frank like this before and Frank realises that he put him off by letting him see too much of the “real mess” he is, which he kept hidden from anyone but Gerard in all these years. He has a panic attack that his fiancé also doesn’t know how to deal with. Gerard could easily swoop in and tear up their whole relationship, but instead he gives Frank’s fiancé very clear instructions on how to care for him and leaves before anything serious happens. His fiancé cares for him and calms him down, but he is obviously shaken.

Once Frank has it together again, he finds the signed divorce papers on the table and realises that Gerard has run off once again. He tries to patch things up with his fiancé for another day, but there is obviously something wrong. He wants to break up with Frank, because he realises how much Frank kept hidden from him in their relationship, about his past, about his preferences, all that stuff. His arguments are actually pretty reasonable, but all Frank hears is that his biggest fears have come true, that someone has seen him for who he really is and deemed him too much and unworthy of love.

His fiancé packs his bags and leaves and Frank is absolutely devastated, his mental health going to shit and he knows that he can’t be alone. He calls up Gerard, although he does not expect him to pick up, because disappearing is the one thing he’s good at. He does pick up though and Frank just says “he left me” and Gerard cancels his flight back to LA and shows up on Frank’s doorstep without hesitation.

He moves in without further comment, just getting Frank through the worst of it, making sure he eats and showers occasionally. Frank is convinced he’ll leave after a couple of days, but Gerard only goes home briefly to pick up his art supplies and more clothes and it becomes clear that he will stay as long as Frank needs him to, even though staying too long in one place and with one person isn’t his strong suit.

They just live together, so Frank doesn’t have to be alone. They are not really dating or sleeping with each other for the longest time. It basically mirrors the final part of 12th Grade, where Frank leaves with Gerard without question, because he needs him. And here we finally see Gerard doing the same – staying without question because Frank needs him.

Of course they eventually start having sex again, but it’s slow and weirdly natural. Frank is finally over his heart break enough to talk about it. He tells Gerard how he only ever wanted a family and that boring commitment that Gerard never seemed ready for and that it was more about that sense of safety than about the person, and he thought he finally found it, but apparently, it’s just not meant for him, because he’s too fucked up and doesn’t know how to be happy, etc. And Gerard just tells him that there is no need to get divorced after all and just for the time being, they already are a family.

Frank keeps waiting for the other shoe to drop though, because he knows Gerard and he knows he won’t stay. Eventually, Gerard tells him he has to go back to LA for his job and to his apartment, and Frank braces himself to be left behind. But then Gerard asks him to move with him. His apartment is bigger than Frank’s, he is a studio musician and will get more gigs in LA anyway and there is nothing holding him back. Frank is confused, because asking him to move into his space is very unlike Gerard. It means he’ll give up his retreat, so he won’t have a place to run to anymore, if Frank becomes too much and Gerard tells him that he’s finally done trying to get away.

He also tells Frank “I love you” for the very first time. He never said it during 12th Grade and not during their relationship in college either. Frank points that out and Gerard says “yeah, because the words are a promise and I didn’t want to give it unless I was finally sure I’d be able to keep it”.

They are definitely both fucked up in this and both feel like no one else would ever be able to put up with them, that’s why neither of them got the divorce in the first place. It’s not necessarily healthy, but by the end of it, they have matured enough to finally get more comfort than hurt out of each other’s brokenness.

#anon ask #sorry this reply escalated a little

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