#if Neil's going to be captain he's going to have to do a lot of post game interviews

[embraceweird]

I feel like the biggest hurdle for the foxes Neil's sophomore year is figuring out how to get Neil to behave during press interviews

[lesbiansfor-blackbeard]

because wymack is the one you call when you're just lost and you don't know what else to do

we know neil calls from the airport but he also calls from the mall, when teammates have dragged him out after andrew has graduated and there are too many people and he just wants to go home

kevin calls many times his first year out of school, alone, standing in the liquor aisle of the grocery store and just needing to hear that he still matters

seth would have called after he found out his wife was pregnant and he runs out the door. he calls wymack from his car in some parking lot and gets an earful and a game plan

maybe jean calls when he can't get a hold of kevin and hes spiraling. wymack doesn't let him hang up until jeremy is sitting next to jean and wymack has found kevin

dan calls after her aunt shows up. she has a spine she built herself, and wymack reminds of her of that. he reminds her that yes, she has a soft spot and wants to help, but that he wouldn't have made her captain if he didn't have faith in her ability to stand up for the foxes. and he reminds her that she is a fox as well.

renee just calls to talk. she calls because she worries about wymack as he gets older. she calls after her mom passes away. she calls just to keep in touch.

allison rarely calls. she sees him on holidays and misses him but she finds it hard to keep in touch. one morning a scandal breaks: a gossip site has found allison with her girlfriend. it's too soon, she didn't want everyone to know. and that's the face she puts on publicly, but the morning it breaks she calls wymack just to sit, and to remember the family she was and is a part of that will always have her back

andrew calls because he misses wymack but her never admits it. like neil, wymack was the first man who let him be safe, who listened as he crashed through his meds and let him be himself one night a week and believed in him. andrew calls to say nothing, but that's okay because wymack doesn't know what to say either.

it takes aaron a while to call. he liked wymack, sure, but he always knew his brother was the first choice. it's actually wymack that calls first after aaron graduates medical school with a "congratulations" and an "I knew you could do it" aaron starts sending pictures and videos of his daughters and he even tries to get the original foxes organized for a meet up once a year

nicky calls just to say hi, much like renee. but many years after they've all graduated he calls, and thanks wymack for gluing his family together when he was coming apart at the seams to keep his cousins from drifting.

matt calls after his first kid is born. "I don't want to be like my father" and wymack is a little taken aback because he has a hard time seeing how matt and his father are even related and eventually matt says "I want to be you." and wymacks heart heals a little when he hears that because he is so unlike his own father that one of his foxes wants to be like him

this got a little off topic but I love post-uni foxes

[aleclighttwd]

Unlike Andrew and Neil whose slowburn was crucial to their characterization and situations, I think Jeremy and Jean will be more swiftly established. This does not necessarily erase Jean’s past experience with sexual assault and how that will be explored in his relationship with Jeremy, but it is an incentive that they do not have driving forces working against their attraction for each other. We know it’s exists and that it’s mutual, however, their roadblocks are more plot-driven. Jeremy is the captain of the Gold Court; he’s the face of USC and comes from an influential family that has proven to be controlling. Jean is a Raven; he’s a recent transfer to the Trojans with rumors circling that he slept his way up his previous line. Jeremy wouldn’t ever want to participate in Jean’s suffering by giving reporters more “evidence” and Jean wouldn’t ever want to taint Jeremy’s captaincy and reputation by placing him in that position. Their relationship is going to be built out of bravery; a typical we-love-each-other-screw-what-anyone-says type of story that we see in a lot of queer media. Yes, I believe boundaries and respect will also play a major role considering Jean’s past, but there isn’t a lot of barriers between Jeremy and Jean that would suggest a slowburn.

[kevindavidday]

ok but imagine:

Even if it takes her a little time to come to terms with the fact that Kevin is Wymack's son, Dan soon takes up the role of being the annoying older sister. For the remaining year she lords over Kevin not just as the captain but also as his Elder sister in spirit and it pisses Kevin off soooooo much (Matt also participates by calling himself Kevin's brother in law and then blushes when Dan looks™ at him)

But like definitely one day in some game some dickhead is going to say some shit about Dan and Kevin is gonna punch him saying 'Watch what you're saying about my sister, asshole' and everyone is going to be like 🫠🫠🫠

Wymack in tbe distance is going to be simultaneously cringing and proud

wymack is never not cringing around the foxes this is real and true

also, absolutely yes the trio of wymacks main kids from oldest to youngest is: dan, kevin and neil

dan has every right to bully kevin within an inch of his life - thinking of that time she got him started on a convo about exy and he was like ykw i'm gonna sit with her and then neil ditched them for andrew...it was like?? why would you do that to our bonding time neil???

kevin as a middle child makes sense tbh, and neil kevin as over protective younger brother figures only to end up backing away cuz dan's the one standing over them as the overprotective older sister. tbh this dynamic makes all their scenes ten times funnier: neil saying 'dan, i said please i tried to be nice' and smacking kevin at the back of his head, and the constant yapping...yeah i get it

i think kevin and dan have a lot of potential for growth + dan would love amalia i just know it and i already know she's neil's favorite so there's definitely some bias there lol

[jtl-fics]

Masterpost for Fluent Freshman AU

Here is where you can find every installment of the Fluent Freshman AU since it’s getting a lot longer than I intended considering it was mostly a one off goof post that got some legs in my brain.

Fluent Freshman Final Draft:

Ao3 Link

Fluent Freshman Extras Masterpost:

HERE

Below is the various parts of the rough draft for the final draft that is currently being posted on Ao3. Enjoy it memes and all :)

Part 01 - “Bunny” “Darling”

Part 02 - “Never have I ever...”

Part 03 - “Hey wanna learn how to use a knife?”

Part 04 - “Oh, I kept some Pepto behind the counter for you.”

Part 05 - “We’re taking a drive.”

Part 06 - “Are we still going on that drive?”

Part 07 - “Sure”

Part 08 - “Those pies look good.”

Part 09 - “We have plans for that whipped cream tonight”

Part 10 - “You can just shove them off.”

Part 11 - “It won’t happen again.”

Part 12 - “You were shopping??”

Part 13 - “That sounds like what someone who wants to lick the spoon would say.”

Part 14 - “Pull out the brownies and go back to sleep Smith.”

Part 15 - “Alright, let’s go to Eden’s!”

Part 16 - “Surprise Me.”

Part 17 - “Acceptable. You know the rules.” Part 18 - “Just enjoy your drink Smith” Part 19 - “What’s your name by the way? Sorry I missed it.“ Part 20 - “I am Miss Congeniality!” Part 21 - “Well, that’s about what I expected.“ Part 22 - “I don’t like that you hid it from me.” Part 23 - “Classified” Part 24 - “Nicky, just calm down!” Part 25 - “Amateurs” Part 26 - “How’s he doing?” Part 27 - “Well then translate for us.” Part 28 - “Captain Neil said you wanted to talk to me.” Part 29 - “He still calls you Captain Neil.” Part 30 - “I don’t even know if they have dental.” Part 31 - “Just me?” Part 32 - “Are you lost?” Part 33 - “Does Kevin Know?”

Part 34 - “What an asshole.”

Part 35 - “You said this was phase one?!”

Part 36 - “Where. Is. My. Car?”

Part 37 - “You don’t...care?”

Part 38 - “Nice Catch”

Part 39 - “We’ll figure something out”

Part 40 - “You look better in orange anyways.”

Part 41 - “No, thank you.”

Part 42 - “Let’s get out of here.”

Part 43 - “I don’t even need this degree.”

Part 44 - “I bet it is.”

Part 45 - “I promise to not make fun of you."

Offline Doc: HERE

[dolcefiente]

Dead Poets Society. 📖

10/10

— The damn tears… I can’t remember the last time i cried that much. It was absolutely beautiful. Literally made me into poetry. I’m reading and writing poetry. The impact this movie had on me is crazy. I wish i could forget about it and rewatch it again and again.

— At first, i was so hyped up! These boys were going to have such beautiful minds and hearts, they were going to have meaningful conversation. Mr. Keating was a wonderful teacher and the boys were so lucky to have him. I bet those lessons made every other student’s school life a lot more interesting and fun aswell. Made me wish i had someone to inspire me like him.

— This part was 🔛🔝.

— Amazing cinematography, amazing lighting, amazing cast, amazing script, amazing storyline, amazing actors… It felt as if they were actually living their normal lives in that school everyday. I loved every scene and absorbed it carefully.

— These two made me giggle so much. As someone who’s dealing with anxiety, i can say that we all need a neil in out lives. Because the guy inside us keeps us away from a lot of things and someone promosing us that ‘it’s going to be okay’ affects so much than you can guess. Even if that person doesn’t really do much, we feel relieved that someone actually cares our state of minds. That takes most the weight off of us.

— After i finished the movie, i scrolled through my socials and people were also crazy about these two. I didn’t really considered them as lovers but it’s one way to look at it i guess. 😅

— As the movie continued, i started feeling anxious and my guts didn’t fail me again. Neil’s death was a trauma for all but Todd & Mr. Keating the most. Losing such a person that ruled the people with kindness and the leader who never asked but always needed of course made people feel empty. But losing your roommate who checked up if you’re doing fine, convinced you to do as you wish, promised to take care of you is just… So upsetting that i had to pause and cry.

— Also FUCK Cameron for what he did. He always felt uneasy with the group and tried getting along anyway. Then ruined everything as if it was his own and everyone began to feeling depressed. Mr. Keating opened eyes and Cameron had no right to poke his annoying ass in them. I hope he becomes whatever he wants to be but never seen in daylight ever again. Mr. Keating was a captain to all.

— Todd’s poem, Neil’s play and failed confession, boys running to the woods to read their silly poems and every other scene was filmed so beautifully. Every single one of them had meanings behind them and i enjoyed all.

— Everyone should watch DPS before it’s too late to feel silly things in your stomach for reading beautiful writings. Watch it before you grow up as adults.

🎬,, Oh captain, my captain. You will be missed. (Rest in peace Robin Williams.)”

[zionworkzs]

Okay, but I need to talk about Good Omens and The Sound of Music.

First of all, I’m genuinely obsessed with it being explicitly canon that The Sound of Music exists in the GO universe and is, for some reason, God’s favorite movie. Neil says here that Heaven misses the point of the movie/musical, but I find it incredibly fascinating that Aziraphale outwardly despises it. 

Brief summary of The Sound of Music incoming as well as some really interesting parallels:

So we've got Julie Andrews playing Maria, who is studying to become a nun in an abbey in Salzburg. Problem is, she isn't the best nun, and is often late to chapel and just isn't the shining beacon of holiness that the rest of the nuns expect her to be.

In response to this, the Reverend Mother of the abbey decides to send Maria to live with sexy widower Georg von Trapp, a navy captain who desperately needs help with his seven children. The Captain is a bit of a hard-ass since the death of his wife, and has been treating his kids like little soldiers as well as banning music from the house.

The 7 kids are rambunctious and make things difficult for Maria at first. But one night, a thunderstorm scares them, and they run to Maria for comfort. The kids realize that Maria is really fun, and then later, when their dad is off to Vienna, the kids and Maria end up running around Salzburg singing, dancing, climbing trees, and having a blast.

When the Captain comes home and hears about this, he sends Maria away. But then he overhears the children singing a song Maria taught them and he gets all emo and remembers how much music meant to him and his late wife. He asks Maria to stay after hearing the song, telling her she's brought joy back to their house.

And oops, Maria and the Captain are falling for each other, but the Captain is sort of kind of dating this blonde bombshell.

There's a big fuck-off party, and the Captain and Maria dance together.

But, oh, no, Blondie saw them and can clearly tell they're in love. She tells Maria what she's seen and Maria is freaking out cause she's just realized she's in love.

Mentally, my girl Maria is going through a lot. She thinks she’s disappointed God by falling in love when she was supposed to be doing a job. She feels scared by the depth of her feelings and because of all these emotions, she runs away. Back to the Abbey. Back to presumed safety.

Mother Superior figures out what happened real quick and tells Maria that she isn’t wrong for falling in love. She sends her back to the Von Trapps, and it's such a great scene. If you wanna watch, I included a link below.

Maria goes back, and the kids are elated and she and the Captain confess their feelings (and oh my god, don't even get me started on the lyrics to the song they sing to each other while confessing, Something Good).

(I’m unwell.)

So that's the Sound of Music. There's a subplot going on with WW2 and the Captain being pressured to join the Nazi regime (which he is very against). King, we love him.

I pointed out some obvious parallels, but I'd also like to pull some random thoughts together here:

Mother Superior (God) is the one that sends Maria (Aziraphale) to help the Von Trapps (humans) in the first place.

Maria (Aziraphale) extends grace and patience with the children (humans) and refuses to give up on them, even going so far as to disobey their father by letting them fuck around and be kids (going against God's wishes and giving humans the flaming sword).

Mother Superior (God) also sends Maria (Aziraphale) back to the Von Trapps after realizing that Maria (Aziraphale) is in love with the Captain (Crowley).

Here's to hoping we see God telling Azi that loving a demon is chill and he should go back to earth in S3.

Overall, it's incredibly amusing to me that Aziraphale, our Aziraphale, doesn't like The Sound of Music, with the main plot being about a woman who choses love over religious obligations and a man who rejects an authoritarian regime so that he might make his own way in the world.

Maybe Aziraphale recognizes the parallels and is in denial. Or maybe he just prefers Sondheim...

[average-joseph]

I haven't watched Dead Poets Society in a long time and I'm suffering. I love analyzing film and cinematography. Here's what I found on my rewatch.

During the scene when Charlie plays the saxophone Neil isn't even watching. He is literally playing with the lamp the entire time.

During meetings, whenever Todd isn't sure what's happening or there's a problem, every single time he looks at Neil with a "please help" look.

This one I've been thinking about for a while but I think I have proof. During the "No <3." Scene, Neil is wearing his blanket around his shoulders. The blanket is green with a red outline. In the "Neil's dead." Scene, Todd was sleeping with the red seamed blanket. "Oh but Joseph! Weren't the blankets all the same? They wouldn't add that detail. :(." NAY I SAY. When Todd looks out his window after Charlie's expulsion, his blanket is completely green! They took Neil's blanket after he died! There is no red seam! They were gay your honor! Todd tried to steal Neil's blanket I declare.

Mr. Keating has a map of the U.K. in his classroom with a red dot of where I assume he lived.

(This one is just a theory. A CHARLIE THEORY). When Neil is driving away from Henley Hall, someone in the background says "We'll be home at 11:30." I can only assume Neil got home no earlier than 12, because his parents go to bed immediately. There are a lot of shots of Neil just contemplating what to do, so I assume that took a while. Say an hour. When Neil is in the study, it's starting to get a bit lighter outside. It's very early in the morning when Neil dies. Seriously, watch it and look out the window. My guess is Neil died at about 3 am. The next scene with Todd starts in his room and it's still dark outside. So it's safe to assume it took place at about 5:30. That means Charlie found out almost immediately. I'm guessing he must have overheard a teacher or a student. But the point is he overheard it. That means he was awake. My conclusion is that Mr. Charlie Dalton was scared out of his mind of something bad happening to his best friend, so he couldn't sleep.

When Keating walks in the room the final time, Cameron literally doesn't move his head. He looks compleatly unphased.

The only 2 people who say "O Captain My Captain." Are Todd and Knox because Charlie and Neil were everything to them.

During Neil's assembly, Knox is singing the loudest.

[foxufortunes]

From: unknown number you’ve been invited to a monsters ball lucky you rabbit

Finally, the fic is out, A Monsters' Ball the pro-exy team MSBY Black Jackals (ft Andreil and some rabbits). Details like team line up and positions, alt jerseys, layers and some backstories beneath the cut.

So, our team line up and some details (and yes, I do have a colour coded spreadsheet to keep track of all this, which Neil and Sakusa constantly mess up by being the wrong year for their age bc they're babies, but ages are rough because no everyone has a declared birthday/age) with some art breaks between:

#4 Captain Meian Shuugo - 29, backliner, 5yrs MSBY, 5yrs college, from one of the country's best high school teams, 1 season as captain, trying really hard to be mature and not find everyone's antics funny, eternal rival to Hirugami Fukurou, captain of the champions, the Alders.

#20 V.Captain Hirugami Shouko - 26, backliner, 2yrs MSBY, 5yrs college, from another top high school, middle child of 2 pro-exy players (two of the earliest adopters before it got big, probably ppl who went to uni with Tetsuji and Kayleigh), younger sister of Alders captain Fukurou, joined the Jackals out of desire to say fuck you to her older brother.

#2 Amani Kanoka - 23, striker, rookie MSBY, 5yrs college, from a private all girls high school that became the best in the country, known as the Queens of Exy, very shy, has a lot of confidence issues, that she handles by being the best on court.

#5 Nathaniel Wesninski - 24, striker, MSBY rookie, 1yr Baltimore Wildcats, 4.5 yrs EAU Ravens, 0.5yrs PSU Foxes, joined the Foxes after only a year playing in a nowhere team but was quickly poached by the Ravens at Christmas that year and was a regular member the team the next year under his real name, very flighty, big fan of secrets, no idea how to handle the Jackals' chaos (they're like the Foxes but without the trauma).

#12 Bokuto Koutarou - 24, striker, 1yr MSBY, 5yrs college, one of the top 5 strikers in Japan in high school, another top high school team, ultimate himbo, might have committed tax fraud, has a word of the day calendar he's trying really hard to use properly, known for super sharp angle shots and for just bodying people and the ball.

#15 Sakusa Kiyoomi - 22, striker, rookie MSBY, 5yrs college, championship highschool team several yrs running, one of the top 3 strikers in Japan in high school, collegiate MVP, Team Japan 2016 squad, Team Japan U19 rep, grumpy baby, very into properly folded handkerchiefs, do not touch, preferably do not interact outside of court, speak to him via his adorable cousin or not at all unless saving him from bugs.

Halfway through the team stats, time for some art. The Away Colours! Maybe the racquets change to white too, idk I couldn't be bothered to recolour them though.

Ok, back to the second half of the team:

#3 Andrew Minyard - 25, goalkeeper, 2yrs MSBY, 3yrs USC Trojans, 2yrs PSU Foxes, best goalkeeper and rookie awards during his rookie season, didn't really tell anyone his plans after university just kind of vanished, only told a handful of people he'd signed for a team, Neil thought he was dead, he has a motorcycle now because city traffic is awful on his sports cars and the stadium is walking distance, sometimes plays defensive dealer.

#6 Inunaki Shion - 26, goalkeeper, 4yrs MSBY, 3yrs college (dropped out to go pro), middling high school only competed nationally once, the vodka aunt of the team, here to get people drunk, instigate drama with the monsters and then sit back and laugh, actually very soft on the youngsters, tolerates stupid nicknames like Inu-san and Wan-san (never get tired of that being translated Mr Dog and Mr Woof).

#9 Adriah Tomas - 27, backliner, 1yr MSBY, a transfer from European leagues, surprisingly fast for his size, just happy to be here, comes across as a bit of an airhead, but is usually right next to Inunaki instigating chaos and then pretending he doesn't understand the language enough to know what happened.

#10 Oliver Barnes - 30, backliner, 2yr MSBY, Team USA 2016/2012 Olympic squads, transfer from America, big friendly softie, dad of the team, actual dad of a 5yo girl, starting to consider retirement into coaching so is happy to spend the end of his elite career with these idiots.

#13 Miya Atsumu - 23, offensive dealer, 5yrs MSBY, Team Japan 2016 Olypmic squad, Team Japan U19 rep, from a top high school, considered the best dealer in Japan in high school, signed straight from high school, a particularly offensive dealer, easily doubles as striker, all rounder (all Jackals are all rounders but the dealers in particular), demanding and thoughtless jerk but not trying to be nasty, can come across as arrogant but is the first to accept his own mistakes.

#21 Hinata Shouyou - 22, defensive dealer, MSBY rookie, 2yrs playing street exy in Brazil, middling high school team on the rise, player backliner in high school despite wanting to be a striker, but learned to play all positions in Brazil, sometimes move position based on what team they're facing, general ray of sunshine, obsessed with exy, does meditation and yoga in the sunrise preferably on a beach.

Ok, team done, have some more art because yes, I did layer these team pics up slowly from the base dri-fit layers to the armour/padding to the jerseys.

The Jackals provide uniform everything from base layers to padding to anything like compression sleeves, knee/arm pads and everything else. Armour is provided by them to ensure it's up to regulation and team standards, the Jackals require some kind of shoulder padding (most of the team has detachable shoulder pads, while Bokuto and Sakusa who prefer more shoulder rotation and just more coverage respectively, where seperate bicep/shoulder pads). I've talked more about armour on older wip posts, but they're based on lacrosse chest pads. Brief version: strikers were shorter, around the vitals, backliners generally are longer on the sides to protect the ribs, goalies have more coverage because duh, and dealers wear whatever they like. Every single one has either hollow rigid or extra padded piece over the centre of the chest because, especially in younger players, a ball to the chest can stop your heart.

And there we go!

[aledethanlast]

If I'm already on the topic of the foxes and grown ups, let's talk about Kevin.

I think Kevin mellows out a lot by the time he goes pro. In part because there's not nearly so large an axe over his neck anymore, but largely because around his fourth year, when pro teams start seriously trying to recruit him, he realizes that his caustic and dismissive attitude towards his teammates can't really fly anymore. It's a Raven behavior, a label he's both disavowed and been disowned by, and most coaches are not his dad who will let him do whatever and kowtow to his expertise. He was an assistant coach for one semester, and never a captain. His behavior has a deadline and if he misses it, it might end his career. He's gonna need to make an actual effort.

And he wants to make the effort! He always admired the Trojans for their good nature, and while he is definitely a fox, he thinks he'd very much like being part of a more friendly team.

So when he signs on to his first pro team (the culmination of six weeks of studying various teams for play style, lineups, press reputation, and point stats), he feels ready to turn over a new leaf. If nothing else, he thinks he'd like to make more friends now that he doesn't have Andrew and Neil around all the time. And the team seems like a nice bunch! They're talented, driven, he can see how he can mesh with them.

This sentiment lasts him about a week.

"Put Neil on the goddamn phone," he says as he slams the door of his car.

"Kevin," his father says on the other end of the line. "We are at practice right now."

"I know, that's why I called you."

His father sighs in the way he does when he needs a few seconds to debate who he should blame for this latest headache. Then he hears a fist on glass on the other end, and a minute later the little fucker says "Kevin. How are you."

"I don't know how you did this or why, but I am going to fucking end you."

"Please be more specific." Smug little motherfucker. Kevin slams his foot on the gas and pretends it's Neil's neck. Though he eases up a bit when he almost tailspins out of the parking lot. He hasn't driven a car in six years, fucking sue him.

"Practice ended three hours ago, Neil. I am now leaving the stadium. Can you guess what I was doing in that meantime?"

"Rediscovering the lost city of Atlantis," Neil says, deadpan, and when Kevin goes to trial for homicide he is going to play this recording back for the court and they're going to call it justified.

"No, see, by the time Gotlieb started talking about Atlantis, I knew he was fucking with me. That doesn't salvage the two goddamn hours I spent trying to convince my teammates that the pyramids weren't, I shit you not, built by Napoleon." He pauses as he reconsiders what just came out of his mouth. "This was Andrew's idea, wasn't it?"

"Kevin, if you only talk to people about exy, they're going to think they can only talk to you about exy. Now your team knows you're an actual fucking person. Have fun with that."

Plague upon his fucking house. "Are you expecting a thank you?"

"You promised yourself you'll make more friends. I'm just holding you to it. So...yes."

Kevin doesn't say it, and he tells himself its because Neil doesn't need the ego. Somehow Neil hears him anyway. "Drive home safe, Kevin."

"Go get your rookies in line, Captain," Kevin says, and hangs up. He dials Andrew next; he needs to know just how much of Kevin's thesis Andrew turned into conspiracy fodder.

[jeanmoreausautismstickers]

tsc spoilers to share the brainrot but just a few small moments for you that are just sitting in my head that I NEED to talk to someone about

- jeans promise to Kevin

- Jean hurting Jeremy during practice “Away, Jean. You’re hurting me.”

- “Now I am not safe with you, Captain” because jer asked about Riko

- jer calling Kevin and asking if Riko broke his hand

- just fucking RIKO oh man we knew he was bad but lordy lordy lord he’s a monster

What do you think of it? How do you feel about Jean? Or Jeremy?

I need you to know that all of things you've noted made me cry. okay anyway

tsc spoilers under the cut xx

Jean's promise to Kevin? I fucking threw up brother. like it just. that whole scene and all the complicated feelings has about Kevin (and Neil) but he's still not breaking Kevin's promise. he still makes promises with Neil. like just that small, almost childish hope in him. he doesn't hate Kevin nearly as much as he wants to say he does now that he's gone and I'm so obsessed with it

oh the "Away, Jean" scenes broke my heart because I have a feeling Nora might use Jeremy saying Jean hurt him in the future. be it Jeremy finally Losing It about something and snapping (unlikely) or Jean using it as an excuse as to why he shouldn't look at Jeremy (very likely). they both break my whole heart with this scene, but I loved watching (well reading) Jean grow as a player and as a person, and start to understand that he can change his little habits. it'll just take time and watching his coaches and captain give him the grace he needs for that learning curve has me nawing on the bars of my enclosure

on top of that, Jean telling Jeremy he didn't feel safe? gagged. the fact that Jeremy, despite KNOWING it was a bad choice, stepped away and respected Jean's (slightly self-destructive) boundaries? screaming and yelling and crying my eyes out. that scene hurt me in so many ways, but the biggest one is the fact that Jean knew Jeremy would respect him if he said it. I mean it was like a punch in the throat, but it created a lot of trust between them based on Jean's boundaries and I cannot be normal about it

I'm not gonna lie, I giggled a bit at Jeremy's absolute rudeness on that phone call. like it was definitely heartbreaking and I want to give Kevin a hug. and Jean. and Neil. but the gall to call someone and immediately ask for their traumatic backstory is crazy. anyway, that scene was sad but other than giggling a bit at Jeremy's word choices, it didn't evoke a ton of emotion in me? i already knew about Kevin's had from TFC-TKM so it didn't surprise me, but I did feel terrible for Jeremy and how he found out. he will be making GOOD use of his therapist in the future I just know it

I HATE RIKO. OH MY GOD. the whole book everytime I say his, or Grayson, or Zane's name I had to say a quick prayer for the murderous thoughts running through my head. I hate him I need to hurt him even though he's already dead

i loved this book so much. once the mental illness about it dies down and I can think of it without my heart crumbling I'm going to reread it. I loved all the characters (minus all of the Ravens of course) and I cannot wait for tsc2 to come out. I'm sooo excited and I hope we get a bit more on Jeremy's family and how he thinks he ruined it. it was such a beautiful book and it makes me so sick to my stomach (in a good way) and I love it like my firstborn

I loved loved loved Jean and Jeremy, both separately and together. the parallels of Jean's family giving him up as a child but Jeremy's family not letting him leave even though he's an adult? Nora is fucking insane and i love her for it. her brain is just so good. I hope they get more of Jean accepting he has a family with Cat and Laila and Jeremy. I hope he starts referring to the house they share as HIS house, instead of calling it Laila's. I know he already called it home but I need him to take personal possession of things other than his notebooks. he and Jeremy deserve the whole world and I trust Nora whole heartedly to give them that after she torments us first ♡♡♡

[beemoon17]

My Personal Fox Rankings

I saw @yourleftpinkytoe-blog do this and thought I'd give it a go! These are just my personal rankings and obviously I'd love to talk about why or hear about anyone else's.

Kevin Day (I relate to his mental health struggles and his need for perfection, he's giving gifted kid syndrome, autistic af)

Andrew Minyard (Devoted to his family, enforces his boundaries, relate to his mental health struggles, killing for his brother)

Neil Josten (Most of my love for him is because of his love for other characters, his loyalty and protectiveness over the family he found in the Foxes and his absolute devotion to respecting Andrew's boundaries)

David Wymack ("It's about second chances, Neil. Second, third, fourth, whatever, as long as you get at least one more than what anyone else wanted to give you." I think that covers all my reasoning)

Seth Gordon (We don't get to learn as much about him as the others but Seth hit me a lot harder than I've seen most people feel. He wanted to prove himself, he wanted to be better, he wanted to win. He's the what if. The almost. Every kid who couldn't be saved, Who gave up or was given up on a minute too soon. He was almost there. And then he was gone.)

Aaron Minyard (I have a weak spot for sibling relationships, killing for his brother, the urge to protect your siblings and to stay by your siblings side and at the same time wanting to prove you can be more or different or better than them, not understanding each other completely but knowing you stand and fall together always.)

Matt Boyd (100% projected every urge I've ever had to have a big brother onto him. The way he's always there on the Court to physically protect his teammates, he's big and strong and powerful, but off the Court he is kind and caring and gentle. He loves the Foxes and he has their backs. His relationship with Neil was everything.)

Nicky Hemmick (I loved his blatant and unavoidable queerness, for a character who has canonically been shammed and abused for his sexuality and coming from a world myself where I don't feel safe or brave enough to be unapologetically queer it's so beautiful to read. He took in the twins, he never gave up on them, never walked away. The twins weren't easy, not before the story started and not when we get to arrive in it, but he loves his family and he wants them to have better than he did, and that means something.)

Dan Wilds (Oh Captain my Captain. Dan is an amazing leader and my love for her comes from her devotion to her team. She is tough and she worked her ass off for the role she has, she's more than earned her share of respect. She believes in her team even after years of failing and bullshit.)

Betsy Dobson (The therapist we all dream of having. If Andrew could trust her I can't imagine anyone couldn't with enough time. She is a safe space and a constant, and clearly has patience for days with the twinyards as her clients. The fact that she provides hot chocolate is 100% a huge plus for me.)

Abby Winfield (Always there for the Foxes, whether that's patching them up, giving them a roof to sleep under, or cooking warm meals. She's a safe adult like Bee and Wymack and they are so very important and precious.)

Allison Reynolds (I love Allison, her being this low is NOT Allison hate, I simply did not connect with her as much as other characters, she is still dear to me, all of the Foxes are. She is devoted to the Foxes and found them somewhere safe to run off to and have some fun after shit went down. and even when the worst possible thing happens and she loses the man she loves she comes back ready to fight because she knows it's what he would've wanted.)

Renee Walker (Once again NOT Renee hate, all of those Foxes are dear to me. I had trouble with her "religious angel girl" attitude in a similar way to Neil, I just couldn't trust it. Renee is an amazing force within the Foxes, the bridge before Neil arrived, providing Andrew with an outlet and a friend, protecting the upperclassmen Foxes. I admire her for pulling herself out of darkness, even if I can't connect to the religious aspect, and I admire that she acknowledges and respects her old life, not burying it but not letting it control her future or her present day.

[capcavan]

can i ask about how many ways can a raven break (if thats one of the thing u can ask was a bit confused)

its one we really hope to turn into a fic we have a friend who is very excited for it (and is also our sensitivity reader) riko joins foxes and as part of his therapy with abby he keeps a journal where he writes long thought spirals any time he is anxious so that then he can consider whatever or not he wants to show it to Abby or not, the journal is here to help him keep his thoughts a bit more organized. At some point Riko notices new notes in the journal notes in German (his notes are always in Japanese) as well as doodles and drawings. this agitates him. he is aware that andrew is the only person reading his journal which he passively allows but after the notes started appearing he started hiding the journal. this leads to andrew growing suspicious, when few days later riko catches him going through journal he had hidden they get in a fightt (riko punches him all of sudden something that somehow never happened before). one thing leads to another and over course of following therapy with new therapist as bee was not qualified enough to diagnose him Riko is diagnosed with dissociative personality disorder (all parts of system refer to themselves as Riko but they do have nicknames they use as well) There is "Fox" (you can think about him as all my cute fox riko headcannosn and arts very energetic and full of life very fannon kind of riko)- Riko after joining the foxes, he is much more open in showing his emotions he is actually based on the rp "quarterhouse/roadkill" he dates renee aaron and kevin , genuinely loves life and is very unhappy when he finds out details of his condition - he feels extremally possessive of the body and time he has which leads to frustration towards other alters and fear that their actions might fuck up his already complicated life "Raven" (much closer to canon riko or even fandom riko - evil brody mad bad) - Raven was the first fronter and keeps most of memories from nest, this is why fox himself did not remember much form before joining foxes, raven hates fronting now, he misses nest he hates fox tower hates the foxes , his pride is still not healed, he does snot feel safe or accepted around them, he is nyctophile and still gets triggered into fronting any time its perfectly dark (when foxes figure that out there is some teasing happening about it which he despises) as well as when it rains. Raven loves kevin and feels posessive over jean and does not see reason why renee and aaron should be part of that. is the one who broke jean "captain" possibly riko's first split - captain is on the court and takes care of all things exy, he will become good friends with neil who will be the only reason captain starts fronting outside of games- just to chat about exy. captain is also not convinced about need for relationship with renee and aaron as he sees both to be mediocre players and he is straight (all of this plays a lot into aarons relationship insecurities and makes fox miserable and resentful of his alters). captain is very frustrated to find out he is not a captain any more and is pretty damn hurt over not being a captain anymore it is bit of crisis for him considering the title was core of his personality as far as he rememberer. later on riko get title of co captain <3 is very confused as to why jean can not play "King" - trauma holder, specifically physical abuse , hates fronting because feels phantom pains constantly "Princes" - a split made to help King cope with the psychological part of the abuse, princess is regressed little girl who just wants to be loved and cared for, jean is her knight and she can NOT find out who hurt him , it would break her

there is also danny who is split from one of riko's most constant abusers he does not front just provides bad vibes and keeps them on edge psyhologically fun stuff i love about it: Kevin absolutely can not deal with the fact that he is not the favourite person of all rikos fox woudl prefer not to choose but renee was his girlfriend before kevin became his boyfriend again raven sees kevin as his everything so this checks out captain also likes kevin but he end sup pretty taken by neils approach to the game over time princess loves jean and renee and idk she doe snot give a fuck about exy so can kevin shut up about it? (jean is delighted) king does not like anyone i don't think kevin should want to be dannys fave luckily nobody other than riko knows about danny anyway there's actually .. a lot of lore for this technically the ship is riko/renee/aaron/jean/kevin the same way like in quarterhouse but fox unlike raven feels embarrassment and shame for pact actions and doe snot feel even allowed to look at the man

[a0wz]

A Fox Walks a Dog

I've had this idea of the Trojans and Foxes going on a combined team retreat. Wrote a short moment of the day they all go to the beach!

Andrew had said no.

Jeremy had learned to have Neil do the heavy lifting when trying to convince Andrew to do something.

The Foxes were invited out to an Exy retreat to the Golden Court. Neil and Keven couldn't have been happier to examine the happy-pilled team much closer now they also had an ex-raven to harden their playing style. Each day would be a different activity with weekends reserved for outings. Of course they couldn't go to California without hitting up the beach, according to their sickeningly smiley captain, Jeremy. Looming near the unnatural blonde like a shadow was Jean. Both of them hid behind Neil as he repeated Jeremy's ask.

"There's a lot we had to do with setting up our spot, everyone had pitched in but you. It's only fair." On a leash, was the dumb face of a panting golden retriever. Andrew didn't care enough to recount her name even in his private monologue.

"We promised her a treat if she behaved on the drive here and she was such a good girl!" Jeremey pleaded their case with loving strokes along the shoulders of the fury beast.

"I didn't want to be here in the first place, how is this any of my problem?" The beach was much too open of an area for any of the foxes to feel safe in. How any of them could have a good time was a true mystery to the goalie. It was bad enough at least three people here had ties to the mafia, a drowning could be easily staged and Andrew didn't think he had enough swimming experience for a rescue.

The deep red of the stricker's hair glowed, almost fiery in the harsh sun. Neil switched to their only other common language, Russian, to relay a promise if Andrew took the slobbery thing out and got her a treat.

Andrew was silent and his golden-amber eyes narrowed to slits. Neil understood it as a victory and handed the leash over with a heavily scared hand.

How could he be okay with any of this? "You of all people should hate the beach." He chose to speak in English, allowing Jeremy and Jean to relax having been let back into the conversation.

The red haired fox tilted his head in thaught, and gave a sneering smile, only his glacier eyes gave way to any amusement at the allusion.

"I smoke for the nostalgia. This," he glanced around coolly, "is a fucking daydream."

[jtl-fics]

Fluent Freshman - Part 06

PREVIOUS

Andrew is dragging FF across campus towards where he parked his car and he is kinda of concerned that FF is just like fully letting himself be dragged across campus. I’m talking full on Andrew has a grip on the back of his hoodie, FF is just staring up at the sky, FF’s feet don’t even attempt to stop Andrew from pulling him where he wants to go, and when Andrew looks back FF’s face is just :I

Which even Andrew can admit is kind of weird.

Meanwhile FF is just like ‘The ground hasn’t really gotten cold yet so I’m sure Captain Neil and Andrew could really go to town on the hole they’re going to bury me in. I wonder what gave me away? It was probably the fucking Russian Literature book. I didn’t even like the plot twist in that one anyways. Can’t BELIEVE I’m gonna die due to my love of trashy literature. Thanks Grandma. Wait I’m sorry grandma, I didn’t mean to be rude-“

“Hey Granny Smith! I’ve been looking for you!” A most loathed nickname coming from a most loathed voice. Andrew doesn’t stop towing FF because why the hell would he? FF has never been so grateful to be dragged to his death! Now if only Andrew would break his long standing and well-known absolute refusal to do anything more than walk at a brisk pace.

He sees his step-brother jogging up to him and FF almost turns to Andrew to ask if he could just kill him HERE so he doesn’t have to deal with his step-brother and THEN get stabbed to death in the forest? He can accept that he should have told Andrew and Captain Neil that he knows Russian and the death sentence that rightfully comes with that but like C’MON having to deal with his Step-brother is just cruel and unusual punishment!

His step brother catches up and in a way maybe all the mental torture he’s gone through since coming to Palmetto is a good thing! He really was a novice at the poker face before and now he’s a grand master champion of staring at something that’s gonna SUCK and pretending like he has no idea that it is.

“Whoa there Granny.” His Step brother grabs his arm and tugs him out of Andrew’s grasp. Andrew really had not been paying attention to whatever jack off had been yelling something about apples. So FF getting yanked out of his hand was actually his first indication since FF didn’t say or react at all before. “You’ve been dodging all of Dad’s calls y’know. You still haven’t sent anything that we asked you for, got any excuse for that?!” His step brother demands.

FF looks heavenward because this is, like, so embarrassing. He can feel people stopping and staring at them.

(They were staring before his Step-brother showed up because he was getting visibly dragged through campus by ANDREW MINYARD. Some of his friends who had seen it were already planning a memorial service and candle vigil)

“Nope.” Because he has nothing to say about whatever the hell his step brother is talking about.

“Mom’s heartbroken you know! You haven’t reached out to her once!” he says. 

“I’ll get on that.”

“Are you going to get the stuff we asked you for?! We are family aren’t we? We’re not asking for a lot. Just for you to get tickets to your games for Dad’s colleagues, some autographs from your teammates, and a good word to that bleeding heart coach that we all should get the free ride you’re getting. That’s not too much right?!”

Andrew hasn’t intervened yet but now Andrew is under the impression that FF stopped hanging out because the kid’s family has been harassing him with calls and maybe this isn’t the first time they’ve come in person to campus. That’s why FF has been fading into the background. Andrew’s now under the impression that FF’s family has wanted him to use the Foxes (tickets, autographs, scholarships for his step brothers) and FF had just been pulling away so his asshole family wouldn’t bother the rest of them. That FF may not have been able to cut off contact completely because of a grandparent he was close to.

These are, in fact, the WRONG impressions of the situation at hand. The truth of the matter is that Wymack helped him get a new phone and phone number within 24 hours of getting to Palmetto, it was the one extra that he asked for in his contract and Palmetto is paying his phone bill now. The phone with the number his ‘family’ had just sits charging in a drawer on silent in Wymack’s desk because Wymack is INFINITELY petty when it comes to the things his Foxes are running from.

The other truth of the situation at hand is that Fluent Freshman’s grandma is the only member of his family he talks to regularly and he talks to her almost every single day of his life, she is the only person he can be completely honest with because she knows what a wimp he is and loves him regardless. 

His Grandma is just an EXCELLENT actress. So when his ‘family’ comes over for answers she’ll sigh, stare longingly at a framed photo of FF, and look out the window with a single pre-staged tear in her eye. She wouldn’t give them his new number no matter what.

He loves his grandma even if it was her teaching him Polish, her native tongue, that lead to him getting interested in the other slavic languages that lead him down the deadly path to Russian.

ANYWAYS.

Andrew is under some very wrong impressions but he is also under one very correct impression and it’s the impression that’s the most important anyways.

Fluent Freshman’s family is what made him a Fox and Fluent Freshman’s family are therefore the enemy.

Except FF doesn’t give Andrew the time to pull out his knife, “No, I don’t wanna do that. Bye Greg.” He says, pulls out his student ID, slaps it on a nearby scanner for a STUDENT ONLY building and power walks inside leaving Andrew and his Step Brother alone.

The door shuts behind FF with a distinctive lock and Greg looks at Andrew his face purpling from anger, “You’re going to let me in there and-“

Andrew now has plenty of time to pull out his knife. “You’re going to what?”

Greg swallows and in a show of excellent survival instincts runs the fuck away.

Andrew watches him run before he turns back to the STUDENT ONLY building and heads in himself. He finds FF just inside the doors and he looks tired sitting there against the wall. FF doesn’t say anything to Andrew, doesn’t even acknowledge that he’s there. Andrew takes a spot on the wall across from him. People give them weird looks but Andrew is fine with waiting.

He doesn’t mind just sitting in silence with FF again even if the circumstances aren’t what they usually are. So they sit.

FF has blue-screened. The stress of his impending death, of his step brother showing up and saying crazy shit, he blacked out a bit from the stress of being between Andrew and Greg and has no memory of what he said before he walked into this building and then there’s the fact that he just WALKED INTO SOME RANDOM CAMPUS BUILDING (oh god he’s probably not supposed to be in here but Greg is definitely still loitering outside maybe security will be gentle if he just sits right by the exit so they don’t have to go far to kick him out? Maybe he should move near a Different exit so Greg doesn’t see him get tossed like yesterday’s trash? Well he already sat down so now it’s embarrassing if he gets up to just go SIT AT SOME OTHER EXIT.)

So he’s taking a moment to reboot.

Unfortunately his ability to have internal conversations and recognize that someone is there with him is one of the last things that loads.

“It’s fine. I’ve always been the leftover kid. I don’t care that they don’t care. I don’t care either.” He says and it’s a mantra he’s repeated for almost a decade now.

It is definitely not something he thought he was saying out loud in the presence of Andrew Minyard and it is also definitely not something he was SAYING to Andrew Minyard but how the hell would ANDREW MINYARD KNOW THAT WHEN FF IS STARING STRAIGHT AT HIM WHEN HE SAYS IT.

So Andrew thinks it’s the explanation FF is offering about his step brother / family. If there’s one thing Andrew knows the feeling of it is being the ‘leftover’ kid.

The one-sided kinship grows while FF is working on rebooting his vision and getting his heart rate down to a BPM that wouldn’t have medical doctors concerned.

Finally, FF blinks his vision has returned back to him, sees Andrew Minyard across the hall from him, and, by the grace of GOD considering his fried nerves, FF does not flinch.

Andrew doesn’t make any move to grab him and FF decides to take this momentary reprieve that his executor is granting him to shoot off a text to his grandma. “I am so grateful for all the love you have given me throughout my life. I think I’m going to see Dad in the next few hours so please let me know if there’s anything you want me to say to him.” Is what he sends.

(This grandma has gotten almost this exact same text when he had an oral presentation last week. Her grandson is a wimp but she loves him.)

“Are we still going on that drive?” He asks his affairs settled. It’s nice that Andrew let him have a breakdown here and even let him text his grandma his final thoughts. He was willing to use his blood to write out the message but where would he get the paper?

“Yeah, we can go on that drive.” Andrew gets up and offers his hand to FF who looks at it for a long moment KNIVES. THOSE ARE KNIVES. HE USUALLY CONCEALS THEM BETTER? IS THIS HIS WAY OF SAYING HE’S GOING TO BE REALLY MESSY WITH MY DEATH? OH GOD HE’S NOT READY.

(Andrew didn’t really take the time to put his knives back in his arm bands properly because he figured he needed to catch FF before the kid disappeared again. He didn’t think he’d find him just inside the door.)

FF pushes himself up onto his feet.

They get to the Maserati and FF was AWARE that Andrew had a nice car but he hadn’t pieced it together that he’d be doing his last ride in such a nice car. He briefly pauses by the trunk wondering if he should just save Andrew the trouble and climb in himself?

Andrew sees FF pause at the car and figures he’s just being polite not touching Andrew’s stuff without Andrew’s permission. FF is just that kind of guy.

“The passenger seat is available.” Andrew says and alright cool Andrew wants to threaten him first that makes sense.

Except Andrew doesn’t say anything. Doesn’t drive them to a remote location. He’s just driving around Palmetto and FF does not think that Andrew is planning on crashing the car to kill him (He has unfortunately heard Aaron and Andrew have a fight in German when he was waiting for his own appointment with Betsy so he also Is aware what happened to their mom no matter HOW HARD he tries to forget that he knows.)

It’s just actually kind of a nice drive?

“He called you Granny Smith.” Andrew states. (Wondering if THAT is the elusive first name)

“I’m close with my Grandma. My last name is Smith. They’re not that creative.”

“Hm.” (Dammit)

Andrew watches as FF’s shoulders eventually relax until he’s almost falling asleep in the Mas and decides that the drive has done it’s job.

Eventually Andrew parks in front of the tower, tells him to respond to his texts from at least him and Neil, and he is released feeling very much like one of those animals that were released back into the wild after being tagged.

He texts his grandma later “NVM it wasn’t that bad.”

NEXT

Per your requests:

@i-have-three-feelings @blep-23 @dreamerking27

[boasamishipper]

tagged by @film-in-my-soul and @icemankazansky - thanks guys!! ❤️❤️❤️

Everyone deserves to toot their own horn and be proud of their work! So, this tag game is fairly simple.

Promote 5 works that you're really proud of and share a little about why you're so proud of them! Then tag as many people as you like. You can reblog this post and add on to it (why not create a giant reclist to throw around?) or steal this header (and border if you like) and make your own post.

tagging @bornforastorm @lookforanewangle @apartmentsmoke @maverickcalf @saltyfilmmajor @hacash @academicgangster @onekisstotakewithme and anyone else who sees this and wants to do it

Make A Wrong One Right

Top Gun, Iceman Kazansky/Maverick Mitchell, Goose Bradshaw & Maverick Mitchell

Maverick makes a wish and wakes up thirty years in the past. He reacts accordingly.

I've written a lot of Top Gun fics (sixty-three, to be precise, which is insane all on its own) but this fic is far and away the one I'm most proud of. Not only did I get to throw in all my favorite things (angst with a happy ending!! time travel!! magical realism!! back to the future references!!), I got the chance to explore in a more subtle way just how much Mav loves Ice, and tackle fun existential questions like, Would you change the past if it meant you might lose the future you love? And I feel like I balanced all of the above and stuck the landing really well! (Honestly, the whole story was worth writing just for the bit in chapter three where Mav calls Ice 'baby' without thinking and Ice bluescreens so hard he drops what he's holding.)

there's a raging fire in my heart tonight

Top Gun&MCU, Iceman Kazansky/Maverick Mitchell, Carol Danvers/Maria Rambeau, Carol Danvers & Iceman Kazansky, Iceman Kazansky & Tony Stark, MCU/Coherent Storytelling

“Carol, you can’t bring a civilian into this—” “Civilian?” The temperature in the room seems to drop twenty degrees as Ice steps forward, flinty-eyed and deadly serious. “I’m a captain. And I earned my rank, which is more than I can say for you, Rogers. Thanos killed my husband. You want to stop me from helping you out, you’re going to have to shoot me.” Silence stretches out, long and fraught with tension. Then Stark laughs out loud, and everyone turns to look at him. “What?” he says. “I like this guy.”

This was the first Top Gun fic I ever published, and the first Top Gun fic I wrote on my own. (At the time, I was working on baby, baby, i'd get down on my knees for you with the fantastic @academicgangster, without whom I never would have gotten into Top Gun or on the Tom Cruise train at all.) Naturally my first foray into this fandom ended up being this chaotic, complicated beast of a fic, where I wrote my faves Iceman Kazansky and Tony Stark and Carol Danvers side by side, fixed all my issues with Avengers: Endgame, and gave everyone the happy ending they deserved (especially after all the additional angst I put them through). I had a blast writing this fic and rambling about all the details with Cain (without her support this fic would never have left our tumblr DMs). There were a lot of plot points to juggle, and I managed to juggle them all. So though I've definitely grown as a writer in the (oh god) five years since, I still look back on this fic very fondly, and very proudly. And who knows, maybe someday I'll go back to this series and write more of Ice accidentally acquiring a son in Tony Stark and a granddaughter in Morgan. (Famous last words, I know.)

Judge Leon AU

Night Court (1984) / Night Court (2023), Dan Fielding/Harry Stone, Dan Fielding & Leon, Olivia Moore/Donna "Gurgs" Gurganous, Neil Valluri/Gabby

When his court-assigned public defender quits on his first night as an arraignment judge at Manhattan Criminal Court, Leon decides to reach out to his old foster father, Harry Stone, for advice. He finds Harry's widower, Dan Fielding, instead.

shot:

chaser:

I could not tell you for the life of me why the hands down angstiest fics I've ever written ended up being for an 80s sitcom whose plotlines include a ventriloquist's dummy committing suicide and my blorbo getting so horny he had to fuck a firehose about it, but here we are!! Over sixty-four thousand words later!!

In all seriousness, though, I'm extremely proud of this series. I have a lot of issues with New Night Court (I have a post in my drafts about that), namely that it lacks the edge and darkness that made the original so good, and this series gave me the opportunity to restore that edge and really make us feel Harry's loss, as well as the loss of almost all the other main cast members. I get to be goofy (a man holds the gang hostage on the advice of members of his favorite subreddit) and I get to be angsty (delve deeply into Dan's low self-worth and depression and grief post-Harry's death) and in all the spaces between, I get to write about how much Harry and Dan loved each other (and develop Leon and Dan's growing bond), and I do it all very, very well. (Certainly better than the NNC writers. Let me into the writers' room, guys!! Help me help you!!)

Austin Alone

9-1-1 Lone Star, Billy Tyson/Owen Strand

After the reopening of the 126, Billy and Owen give being friends with benefits a try. Inconvenient feelings ensue. / Season 3 AU, Owen-centric.

I co-wrote this fic with the lovely @lilalbatross while season 3 was still airing, and not only were we so in tune with the characters and the show that our fic accidentally predicted the future (exploration of Owen's abandonment issues! Owen getting trapped in a collapsed building!), but this fic set my standards so high that now the show can no longer reach it. (To be fair, this is largely because Lone Star decided to become the Tarlos and Wyatt Show above all else, but that's a rant for another day.) I'm proud as hell of this fic for a lot of reasons - I got Billy and Owen's voices down pat, put them in mortal peril that was realistic to the show, and wrote some banger lines of dialogue and prose that made me take honest to god victory laps around my house. The entirety of (the very long) chapter 6 might be some of my best work of all time.

For A Minute There I Lost Myself

Ted Lasso, Nathan Shelley & Original Male Character(s), Nathan Shelley & Ted Lasso, Nathan Shelley & Rupert Mannion

Nathan Shelley and the road to redemption.

[sigh] Really it's such a shame that Ted Lasso never got a season three and so we never got to see Nate grow and thrive at West Ham and bond with his players and stand up to Rupert and become more confident in himself and his ability as a coach and apologize to Ted and just in general have a redemption arc that was not centered on some random one-dimensional mean waitress or his ability to play the violin. But at least we have this fic!

I wrote FAMTILM for Yuletide in 2021. I'd never written Nate's POV before - all my Ted Lasso fics up to this point were about Sam and Dani - so I'm proud of myself for being able to capture the nuances of Nate's voice and write the slow growth of Nate's self-esteem and realization that he was in the wrong and his affection for his players (particularly Višnjić and Roubeni, who are in my top ten favorite OCs I've ever created). I'm also very proud of myself for taking what could have been a 30k word story and telling it just as well in under 8k, and writing a full Natedemption arc in less than a month that turned out to be ten times better than what Sudeikis and co accomplished in twelve bloated episodes.