#idk what to say honestly that doesn't come off badly just like

[tumbloggingattheendofitall]

I like the good old fashioned fingers and warm water to clean between the lips and around the visible parts, and otherwise yeah, genuinely, seriously, wholly - no soap, no air, no power washing - your vagina is a delicate piece of your anatomy in many ways and simultaneously a Bad Bitch that can definitely do way more than most think is possible - I mean geeze the average vagina dilates enough to push a whole human put at least once in its lifetime so like. They're not delicate generally, but they have very specific care instructions - like that one linen dress you own. Sturdy as fuck, but be careful how you wash it (in the former example, fingers, water, External Surfaces Only) (also I can't remember how to wash linen right now but I do know that all of my linen clothes are sturdy as fuck But Only when I wash and dry them correctly)

wait, it’s not healthy to use the shower head to clean your vagina? like shoot the water up there? that’s bad?

jesus christ please don't do that. 1) any form of douching or flushing out your vagina is terrible for your vaginal health, since it devastates your vaginal bacteria (YOU NEED THAT) and leaves you susceptible to infection. 2) blasting a forceful jet of water into your vaginal cavity could seriously hurt you.

your vagina doesn't need you to clean it; it does that all by itself. if you're experiencing something abnormal with your vaginal health - unusual discharge, itching, strong odors, etc - you need to seek advice from a medical professional not try to blast it out with a shower head.

[miss-oranje-disco-dancer]

the handyman

pairing: neighbor! joel miller x f! reader

cws/tags: pure smut, DADDY KINK, oral m & f receiving, p in v (unprotected), an abundance of pet names, reader is under 21 but over 18 (for the plot), reader is kinda stupid, big dick joel, not beta read

summary: pwp honestly. basically a porn plot? idk joel comes over to reader's grandma's house to fix the smoke detector (which she broke) and he teaches her how to be a good girl.

a/n: don't ask why reader lives with her grandma, originally this was going to be longer and it was going to be more relevant

join my taglist!

wc: 2k

You open the front door to and see an unfamiliar man standing at your doorstep – 40 something, jeans and a t-shirt, progressively more handsome the longer you look at him. You size him up, trying to decide what his intentions are.

“Whatever it is you’re selling – I don’t wanna buy it," you say.

He opens his mouth, but you continue before he can say anything. “I don’t even live here anyway, and before you ask she’s not home, so you can’t talk to her.”

“I ain’t here to sell you shit.”

“Well, I don’t wanna sign anything either.”

“Good. ‘Cause I don’t want you to.”

“Then why are you here? I don’t have a lot of time before One Tree Hill comes back on, so make it quick.”

“I’m Joel. I live down the street. I’m here to fix your smoke detector.”

“Oh, in that case, come on in,” you say, changing your demeanor entirely as you realize that you really need to get in this man’s good graces.

“So, you’re ‘handyman’ grandma’s been talking about?” you ask, as you lead him to the kitchen.

“She’s been talking about me?”

“Yeah. She talks about you like you’re her boyfriend.”

“Oh yeah? What’d she say?”

“I dunno. I wasn’t really listening. I thought it might just be some dementia-induced delusion.”

“Well, she’s told me quite a bit about you.”

“Good things?”

“Better than the things she says about all of your other family members.”

“You know what they say, ‘if you don’t want people to talk badly about you, then you shouldn’t ruin Christmas.’”

“Uh-huh,” he says, only half-listening as he approaches the scene of the crime - a broken smoke detector, now just wires and plastic, lays on the kitchen counter. He studies it for a minute, furrowing his brows. “Jesus Christ. What happened?”

“It just fell off the wall.” You shrug, acting nonchalant and hoping he doesn't notice your shifty eyes from across the kitchen.

“No way,” he says – not with curious incredulity, but knowing disapproval.

He turns to you and crosses his arms over his chest, and engages you in a short staring contest.

“What?” you ask, feigning innocence.

Joel swipes the dish rag from the countertop and reveals the evidence you’d hidden under it like he's performing a magic trick.

He holds up the hammer, displaying it to you. He looks mostly disappointed in you - in an oddly paternal way, but also slightly amused, likely by how poorly you’d conducted this whole covert operation of yours. “Why’d you break it?”

“I didn’t break it.”

“Kid, I’m not an idiot. Just fess up, so we can fix it and move on.”

“Are you gonna tell on me?”

“You afraid of your meemaw’s wrath?” he teases.

“I don’t want her to be disappointed in me.”

“Should she be?”

“I didn’t mean to break it. I just wanted it to stop beeping.”

“It’s supposed to beep.”

You give him a pathetic pout that you hope works. It doesn’t. It only makes his gaze harden.

“I’m sorry. It was just one cigarette, and I really, really didn’t want to get in trouble… so when it went off, I panicked and hit it with the hammer.”

He shakes his head and sighs. “You’re a piece of work, kid. Making me come out here on my lunch break-”

“-I’m sorry," you interrupt, "I won’t do it again, so just please, please don’t tell on me.”

“Why shouldn’t I?”

“I could offer you something… something to show my infinite remorse for my actions and my infinite gratitude to you for fixing the mess I made.”

He raises his eyebrows. “Okay. What’s your offer?”

His smirk makes you think you’re on the same page so you get down on your knees in front of him, but when you look up into his eyes, what stares back at you is complete bewilderment.

“Get up,” he says, offering you his hand.

“I thought…”

“I don’t think you were thinking,” he says condescendingly.

“You’ve gotta learn to listen to the thoughts up here,” he says, tapping you on your temple. “Not the ones down here.” His finger brushes against your clit.

The way he speaks to you only makes it worse, the throbbing, aching feeling between your legs. You can’t find a single thing to say that isn’t ‘please’ followed by some utterly depraved suggestion.

Joel turns back to his work, somehow unfazed by the interaction.

“Normally, I’d think this sounds a bit too chauvinistic to ask, but since you owe me, can you get me a beer from the garage?”

Oh fuck. Three strikes, you’re out.

“We don’t have any beer.”

“You sure about that? I just put a six pack in there last week.”

“Maybe my grandma drank them already…”

“Your grandmother said that Budweiser tastes like cat piss.”

“It does.”

“Yeah? And how would you know that? I thought you weren’t 21 yet. Who’s buying you alcohol?”

“I didn’t know they were yours.”

“Uh-huh, but I bet your grandma would’ve told you they were if you’d asked her. But she doesn’t know about your ‘habits’, does she?”

“No,” you admit weakly.

“Come here.”

You step towards him, and wait for him to give you an earful or to threaten to reveal your secrets.

“I’m reconsidering your little offer.”

Your face lights up at the opportunity to make things right, to expunge this from your record.

“So if I did that, we’d be cool, right?”

“Depends on how good you are, darlin’.”

For a second time that afternoon, you sink to your knees, but this time, Joel gives you the go-ahead. You try to balance the coyness you’ve seen women in the movies demonstrate with the eagerness you feel inside as you undo his belt.

With his jeans halfway down his legs, you place your palm over the bulge in his boxers and feel him twitch at your touch. When his cock is finally released from its confines, you try not to be too intimidated. Your confidence is falling but your arousal only rises.

You begin by wrapping your hand around him and stroking his length, setting a steady pace. Then, you tease the tip with kitten licks and hear his breath hitch when you flick your tongue across his slit.

There’s no way you can take him all the way down your throat – you’d probably bruise your esophagus. Still, you try, sputtering and letting saliva drip down your chin. You can’t help but feel a bit proud of yourself when he has to put his hand on the counter to steady himself.

“Hold on, sweetheart,” he says through heavy breaths.

You pull away, upset at what you perceive to be a failure. “You didn’t cum…”

“I almost did, baby girl, but I don’t want to yet.”

You feel a bit pathetic imagining how you must look from his perspective, with your teary eyes, begging him to let you go on.

“You wanna give me a good apology, right?” He nods slowly, looking into your eyes, prompting you to do the same.

“Then, I want you to come sit on the couch with me.”

He takes your hand and walks you to the living room, patronizing since the two rooms are connected. When Joel sits down on the couch, he pulls you into his lap.

“I was thinkin’ about what I said before – how you’re not using your head. You could be such a smart girl – a good girl - if only you could think with your brain. You just need a little bit of help.”

You can feel his hard cock poking through his boxers and rubbing against your pussy. It’s hard to resist the urge to roll your hips, just to get a bit of friction, a bit of relief.

His hand finds its way between your legs and he asks, “What’s gonna happen if I put my hand in your panties right now, baby? Are you gonna be wet?”

While you try to form a response that doesn’t make you sound too desperate, his fingers toy with your waistband. “Remember, baby, good girls are honest,” he whispers into the shell of your ear.

“Yeah, I am… wet.”

“For me?” His hand meets your bare skin and finds that you are, indeed, dripping wet. “Did I do this to you?”

“Uh-huh.” You arch into his touch, shamelessly using his fingers for your own pleasure.

“If you want more, you have to be a good girl.”

With the promise of a reward, you follow his implied instructions and still your hips.

“I’ll be good. I promise.”

He takes your word for it and begins rubbing circles on your clit. You could cum from that alone but he slips a finger inside you, curling it upward to meet that special spot.

Joel expects a response from you, but not the one he gets.

A single word: “Daddy…”

“Oh, baby. I get it now. Been needin’ daddy to take care of you.”

He’s right. You do need this. He can take care of you, you can be good for him. When he fucks you with his fingers, you swear you could fall in love with him.

But when he takes them away, you cry.

“Shh… It’s okay,” he says, wiping the tears from your cheeks. “I wanna do something else. It’s gonna make you feel even better.”

Before you have a chance to think, your panties are on the floor and his head is between your thighs. You can feel his breath on your clit when he speaks. “I want you to be a good girl and cum on my face – can you do that?”

“Yes, daddy.” The word leaves your mouth more naturally than it probably should, it's almost instinctual.

Joel wastes no more time talking, knowing his tongue can convey much more when it runs along your folds, and his lips can elicit a better response when they suck lightly on your clit.

The only thing you have for him is moans accompanied by breathless chanting of “daddy, daddy, daddy.”

He hums into your core, an affirmative, a reminder that you are a good girl. You can do this.

You can cum for him. You will cum for him – there is nothing that can stop the euphoria that rushes through you. It’s the kind that makes your legs shake and your eyes roll back into your head.

Joel was right – the orgasm clears your mind. But the realization that the situation you’ve ended up in – naked on your grandmother’s couch with her middle-aged neighbor who is supposed to be fixing your mistake, not helping you make another - is a precarious one. Being a smart girl seems to be a double edged sword.

Euphemistically, speaking.

In truth, it’s Joel’s cock that’s fully-sheathed inside you. Pain and pleasure mix as he thrusts in and out of you. You swear he might split you open, but even if he quite literally tore you to pieces, you'd die happily.

“You’re takin’ it so well,” he tells you, “knew you’d be a good girl.”

And maybe it’s the praise, or maybe it’s his thumb on your clit, but you’re rapidly approaching a second orgasm. All you can do is hold onto Joel, dragging your nails down his back. He bites your neck in response, and hopefully he doesn’t intend for it be a deterrent, because it only serves to heighten your pleasure.

He slows his pace, but his hips slam into yours harder, filling the air with the sound of skin slapping against skin in a steady rhythm.

“Whose pussy is this?”

You can’t breathe when the weight of his cock knocks the wind out of you, so he stops, allowing you to answer.

“Yours, daddy!”

His lips on yours are your cue to cum – or so you hope because it happens regardless of your will.

He has the sense to pull out and let his release spill onto your stomach.

You sigh, relaxing into the couch. “I need a cigarette,” you say.

“Did you not learn anything from today?”

“Mm-mm,” you say grinning dumbly.

Caught up in a daze – absolutely enraptured by his need to have you – he made the mistake of fucking you stupid.

[lowkeycasanova]

In exchange

ace x afab!reader

Plot: doing ace's skincare mixed in with some c0ckwarming

(idk how i feel about this)

slight smut

"Oh come on! Please!"

Following Ace into the bedroom, you give him a pouty look. He tries to ignore you but miserably fails.

"Why do you wanna do it so badly?" he sighed.

"I think it would be fun and a way for you to relax. Plus, you'll look extra handsome when I'm finished." You've been trying to get him to let you do some sort of skincare routine on him for the longest, especially since he really doesn't have one.

"And what do I get in exchange?" he cockily smirks at you, tilting his head to the side.

You shrug. "I don't know. What do you want?" He pauses as he thinks for a moment and then his grin widens and walks closer to you.

"I'll let you do it...if you let me put it in."

He lowers his voice on that last part, being cheeky.

Your lips slightly part upon hearing his proposal. Ace had become pretty fond of cockwarming recently and wanted to do it often. It doesn't always end up with sex. He just likes to be inside you, close and warm and you can never say no to that.

"Fine." you agreed.

He plops himself down on the edge of the bed. You join him after filling your hands with the essentials from the bathroom, setting it all down next to him. He grabs you by your waist, pulling you on top of him. When your crotch meets his, you can already feel how hard he is through his black shorts and he gives your ass a gentle smack.

"Got everything?" he asks.

"Yeah." you nod.

"Alright, you know what to do." he says, as if he was waiting for you to take the initiative. He smirks, so full of himself.

You reach down and move your underwear to the side as he tugs his hard cock from out of his pants and you take him by the base, guiding and slowly sinking down on him. His erection filling you up completely. You let out a satisfied moan and he bites his bottom lip, humming in content. He presses a kiss to your cheek before leaning back with his weight on his arms, allowing you to do whatever.

As you go through your products, his hands gently massage your bare thighs and ass, patiently waiting. Grabbing a headband, you put it over his forehead to keep his hair back. While putting the cleanser on, his eyes flutter shut and you take a second to notice how long his lashes are. So natural and honestly unfair. You try to focus on putting on the moisturizer under his eyes, but now you can't seem to ignore the urge to start grinding on him. The way he casually fills you up like this should be a crime.

When you lean closer to work on his eyebrows, you accidently buck your hips. A soft grunt escapes your lips at the friction you created.

"You okay?" he asks with an innocent smile but you know all too well he's being the biggest tease ever.

"Yeah," you breathe out, gripping his shoulders to steady yourself. "I'm good."

"Cool." he smiles before closing his eyes again.

You manage to finish the routine without losing your self-control.

"Okay, I'm finished." you say, and the next moment, his eyes appear once more as you take the headband off and his hair falls in his face. He looks breathtaking. His skin is shiny, glowy, and just absolutely stunning. The hottest man ever if you didn't know that already.

"My face feels clean. How do you like it?" He simply asks.

You wanna say something, but have no idea what. Instead, you lean down and give him a hard kiss. That'll let him know your answer.

Forget self control. Immediately, you start rolling your hips, doing what you've been wanting to do for the past twenty minutes. Ace doesn't seem to be against it. His fingers grab a hold of your lower waist, urging you to keep going as your kisses get more heated.

"Fuck." you breathe out, laying your eyes on Ace. His eyes were glossy already and his chest heaved in an attempt to catch his breath for a moment.

"That feel good babe?" he pants, leaning in to kiss the crook of your neck.

"Yes, you feel so fucking good." you moan out, feeling your orgasm build up.

To add, he slightly lifts you up and starts to thrust up.

"Cum for me. Cum on the cock your riding so well."

His words plus the sound of skin slapping was pushing you towards to edge even more.

You grab ahold of the back of his neck before you smash your lips on his again and your release washes over you. His name rolls of your tongue over and over along with breathy groans. He follows a few moments later, gripping your ass with satisfaction as he comes inside you.

After slowing down, you remain on his lap as his cock softens inside. Caressing his cheeks, you admire his newly hydrated face and can't help but smile at how he looks.

That cocky grin returns. "Maybe I should let you do my skincare more often if it ends like this."

[vodika-vibes]

Heyyyy!

Are you doing preference lists? Or idk what’s the name for those lol

So I was thinking about what nicknames would the clones give to the reader?

I love your fics and I hope u have a wonderful 2024!

Nicknames

Pairings: ARC Trooper Fives x Reader, Commander Fox x Reader, Alpha-17 x Reader, Crosshair x Reader, Clone Commando Sev x Reader

Tagging: @trixie2023 @n0vqni

A/N: So I think you're asking for headcanons (at least I hope that's what you're asking for or else I'm answering this all wrong, lol). Since you didn't give a list of which clones you wanted, I'm going to just pick a few. Sev's feels a little awkward, honestly, but I'm still kinda happy with it.

ARC Trooper Fives x Reader - Mesh'la

The first time the unfamiliar word slipped from Fives lips when he was speaking to you, you didn't think anything of it. Fives uses basic and mando'a interchangeably at times, and while frustrating, Fives doesn't have a problem translating for you when you ask.

This time, however, this time when you asked what the unfamiliar word meant (the word falling clumsily from your tongue as you tried to mimic the way he said it) he dropped his datapad and wouldn't look you in the eye.

"Fives?" You ask, "Is it...is it bad? The thing you called me?"

"No!" He blurts his eyes suddenly wide, "No. It's...it's a good thing. It...uh..." He rubs the back of his neck sheepishly, "It means beautiful."

You stare up at him, startled, and then you smile fondly, "You think I'm beautiful?" You ask.

He laughs and favors you with a smile, "How could I not?" He reaches out and lightly brushes the back of his fingers against your cheek, "My mesh'la."

Commander Fox x Reader - Angel

Commander Fox is such a hard worker, always in his office, even on days when he's supposed to be resting. Even when his brothers beg him to take a day off.

He works so hard, in fact, that the first time he calls you Angel you're pretty sure it's because he forgot your actual name. You don't mind. Well, you're a little hurt, you've been working with his for months now and him forgetting your name is like a punch to the gut, but you've always been a bit of a pushover when it comes to Fox.

And then he keeps calling you Angel.

Day after day. Multiple times in a singular conversation.

And you finally have to say something.

He smiles at you, soft and warm and so very fond, "I know what your name is." Fox says as he leans over you and tucks some of your hair behind your ear, "I call you Angel, because that's what you are. My Angel. My whole reason for showing up everyday. My whole reason for fighting in this war. Does it bother you?"

And you find, suddenly, that you don't mind the nickname at all.

Alpha-17 x Reader - Little Love

Working alongside Alpha-17 has always been easy. Sure, it leads to long days and even longer nights, where you bicker and bump heads about everything, but you respect the hell out of Alpha-17, and you know (hope) that he respects you too.

Which is why the sudden nickname startles you so badly.

"I...beg your pardon?" You ask, your eyes wide as you look up at the much larger man.

Alpha rests his chin on the palm of his hands, and watches you with an exhausted smile, "I asked," He repeats, his voice a low rumble, "if you would hand me the datapad on your left," a lazy smirk crosses his face, "Little Love."

"Since when do you call me-?"

He shoots you a thoughtful look, "Since today, I suppose. Is that okay?"

You duck your head, and release a quiet laugh, "Yeah, I think it's a great nickname. Though it's not really true..."

He leans across the table, his gaze serious as he looks you in the eye, "Then lets make it true. You and me."

And, really, how can you say no to that.

Crosshair x Reader - Sweetheart, Kitten

Crosshair is an asshole. He's always been an asshole, he'll likely always be an asshole. At least he's honest about his assholery, you suppose.

Still, you could do without him calling you sweetheart like it's an insult. It's supposed to be a petname! Not an insult!

You know better than to pick arguments with Crosshair. You do! Months of traveling with him have proven that arguing with his is an exercise in futility. But you just can't help it. He's finally pushed you to the edge.

So here you arm, your arms folded over your chest, having a raging shouting match with Crosshair.

...well, you're shouting at him, he's just goading you and making you angrier. And still, still, he's calling you sweetheart! Like...like some villain from a gangster movie.

Fed up with his bullshit, you go to push past him, wanting to remove yourself from the situation before you say, or do, something foolish, but Crosshair moves, and pins you against the wall before you even realize what's happening.

You bite your tongue to stop the flood of curses you want to spit at him, and he smirks at you, "Aww, Kitten. Where'd your claws go?"

And all of the fight drains from your body as your face burns. You were wrong, Kitten is a much worse nickname than Sweetheart.

Clone Commando Sev x Reader - Sarad

For such a hard and rough around the edge man, Sev is surprisingly tender with you. Always the first person to offer you a compliment (even when you look/feel gross and just want to shower and curl up on the couch) and always so very gentle with you, as though terrified that he might hurt you if he's not careful.

And so his nickname for you isn't the least bit surprising.

Sarad. Flower.

At the time you laughed, "Because I'm small and frail?" You teased him, even as you leaned against his solid body and accepted his gentle affection.

"Because you're beautiful. And perfect, just like a flower." Sev corrected, as he brushed his thumb against your cheek, as gently as one would brush their fingers against a flower petal.

And just like that, you fell deeper into love with your stern and hard, and somehow oh so sweet man.

[transzilla]

Need a sub who is going to let me forcemasc him and kick his fucking ass like 80s rough trade style. Like some real neanderthal low IQ bdsm. Like I want to put him in the hospital. LMAO

You like a dom when it's one of your skinny fucking chainsmoking cis boys, like you honestly think you're hard because you let some skateboarder who can't lift a spare tire smack you around a little bit.

Your problem is that you're scared because you don't know what pain is. So believe me when I say I'm going to teach you what pain is.

I am literally on steroids and I do this shit for my own enjoyment.

Have you ever been hit in your liver? Like right on your ribs, a real body shot? It's like somebody lights you on fucking fire from the inside out and your whole body burns worse and worse by the millisecond. And you can taste it. Like I'm making you suck on some pennies. Lmao.

When your nose bleeds it will taste bad but you should be fine provided it doesn't obstruct your breathing. When your nose gets broken, that sinus fracture won't hurt right away from the adrenaline but as soon as it wears off it hurts like fucking hell and you can't touch it without it crunching or cracking around under your skin. You will feel nauseous and then fucking sick at the way your face breaks in ways you didn't know was possible, pieces of your inner cheekbone breaking and getting loose in your eye socket, the devil's own human anatomy lesson. When you get knocked out by getting punched in the face you think you're fine for the first half second but when the momentum catches up and your brain hits the other side of your skull in your head it's good night from there. And after you come to your face will be valentine's red and pink and swollen and nigh unrecognizable and from there is just going to turn so many pretty colors you'll look like a goddamn renaissance painting.

I'm going to make you scared that you're gonna die. And then you're gonna be scared that you might not.

You can complain, you can scream, you can beg, try to run, try to fight back, hold your hands up, there's honestly no point because you know you're going to take it and you know you like it because I say you will so you will. You're a faggot. There is something wrong with you. If you didn't come to me to try to fuck you would have just spent your time trying to run away from the first chucklefuck who knew how to fight and had a problem with you. You made it clear that this is how you accept love, so I will make you wear it on your face.

I am not going to afford you the ability to hide behind a mild, vanilla, effeminate or weak front. I am going to hurt you so badly your friends and your family and your significant other can't even bear to look at you without feeling your pain as badly as you felt it. They can't hold your perfect pretty girly face in their mind anymore, even after you eventually heal your nose has been bent into a new shape and the symmetry your teeth grew into has been rearranged into a haunted graveyard of broken and missing teeth like tombstones. And you can't exploit their safe conditional acceptance anymore. And you have to find a way to live as an ugly fucked up man when you can't get by looking pretty and doing nothing.

And idk maybe after I'll let you suck my dick a little bit.

[akajustmerry]

do you have a top 5 richonne moments?

hell YEA. 💕

In Alexandria when they first get there and rick has one of his classic covered in blood madman monologues and she comes up behind him and knocks him tf out mid sentence and later, he's basically like thank you for not letting me lose my mind <3 it's hot because 1) rick is so hot when he's in maniac mode 2) michonne is so hot when she steals scenes and 3) you know if anyone else did that to him he would NOT have thanked them lol. true LOVE. (I also love this scene cos the first time I watched it was with my then bestie and he was like "rick got MICH-OWNED" and we laughed for ages)

would be remiss not to mention that moment in season 3ish (???) when michonne tries to cheer rick up by letting him know she too also used to talk to her dead ex so she's not bothered by him seeing things and rick smiles for pretty much the first and only time that season hehehe.

it's not really a richonne moment in that way, but danai and Andrew's performances while Carl is dying are so good. like there's a lot of stuff in twd that's forgettable but not that. All the love that's there between the 3 of them in that scene is so guttwrenching and there's the added element of how the cast knew the death was for such bullshit reasons idk. for a death that was so unscrupulous, their performances made it mean something so full of love.

on a lighter note, that bit in I don't rmr what season when rick is gonna head off to do something insane about the junk people or the saviours or whatever and michonne kisses him Like That™ sksksksnsnsndn it's not just because I love them and they love each other so much but also that I'm bi and wanna be them both so badly I could chew on titanium bricks. like that's what mitski is singing about when she's like, "give me one good movie kiss and I'll be alright"

honestly, a lot of people talk about horny and cute they are in say yes and amen 🫡 BUT since that episode is also the richonne thesis statement and manifesto the combat scenes are also SO GOOD. like, richonne isn't just a hot couple madly in love, they are an undefeatable combat duo. even before they were together when they go on their first runs and fight off the governor and terminus etc, they're so (I'm sorry I have no other phrase) drift compatible. they don't even need to speak most of the time they just know what to anticipate from each other. the way rick and michonne fight as such a seemless team with so much trust. unparalleled. genuinely, hope I know a love like that someday (minus undead shit).

this doesn't count because it's just a danai/Andrew moment but that episode in season 8ish when rick's imagining life growing old in Alexandria with michonne? anyway, I think it was in talking dead or something and danai and andrew were being asked about how the make up department aged them and andrew is like, "it was so RUDE. I had to spend hours getting all this old man make up and then I walk on set and all they've done is give danai grey hair!" and she's just like, "well, Black don't crack, baby" they're so funny 🥹

[lord-squiggletits]

For the Salty Asks (forgive us for the avalanche, if it's too many you can pick your top three): 2, 9, 10, 11, 13 (Optimus), 20, 25 (IDW1), 26

uhhh honestly I feel a bit like a hermit who's out of the loop on what's popular/unpopular so some of these might be completely off the mark but here we go

2. Are there any popular fandom OTPs you only BroTP?

Mmmm I think most of my brotp's aren't shipped as OTPs to start with, so I dunno if I have any that fit this question.

Guess the closest example for me would be OPli/ta. I don't actively platonically ship them but I think platonic is way more interesting than romantic. I don't like the fandom's interpretation of romantic O/Plita at all + I feel like as one of the original "token woman" Autobots, I'd like to see Elita unshackled from Optimus as a love interest, esp because any official interpretation of them is probably gonna be written extremely heteronormatively/token romance between an action hero and The Girl. And the fanon version of them that's Strong Independent Girlboss Elita with whipped simp husbnad Optimus is just as boring and gross.

I just don't like the vibes and would rather them have some sort of friendly or regular relationship together.

9. Most disliked character(s)? Why?

IDW1 Slide, who I've gone into detail about my hatred of in several posts, but the TLDR is that she comes off as some kind of mouthpiece character? Not a mouthpiece as in for the author's beliefs, but it literally feels like she only exists to shit on Optimus and call him a piece of shit. Her dialogue is so cheesily written ("literally fascism" is an actual thing she says) and her bitching/lack of cultural comprehension about Cybertronian history is so prevalent, that for a long time during my IDW1 reading I was genuinely confused as to whether she was supposed to be some sort of parody/strawman/mockery of someone IRL (her character comes off almost EXACTLY like an anti-SJW stereotype of a screeching harpy calling everyone she dislikes a fascist, and it's only Barber's very obviously left-leaning writing in other parts of the story that told me that definitely wasn't the intent). So then I was wondering "okay is she gonna like, randomly become evil and turn against the good guys because she's just that petty? I mean she spends all of her time bitching about how Optimus/the Autobots/Cybertronians in general are the worst ever and she also hates humans too so I mean maybe? Half of this story already doesn't make sense so I can see it happening."

Thankfully that didn't happen, but like. Slide is so goddamn annoying and ignorant and gets way too much page time dedicated to her angry monologuing (in Unicron aka the finale of IDW1 there's literally a whole half page panel of her bitching about how Optimus is an evil tyrant while Trypticon is dying behind her and it comes off as a poorly timed, bad taste joke). The narrative treats her like she's some important individual whose feelings are important and valid, but she's fucking annoying. Any sympathy she was meant to garner is canceled out by badly written dialogue and the fact that she's a Literal Nobody of a character who seemingly only exists to bash the decades old, beloved legacy characters. For the sake of, idk, talking about how fucked up Cybertronians are that they just shrug and move on when people die? Bc apparently it's some sort of sin to be numb after 4 million years of war (and war that's literally still ongoing while Slide is bitching) and just soldier on trying to get through it? God forbid that a military hierarchy fighting to keep neo-Decepticons and various other alien threats from colonizing Earth be run like a military in which orders have to be followed, people die, but you still have to keep fighting anyways? Idefk man I just hate Slide so much she's basically the embodiment of all of the bad aspects of Barber's writing personified.

10. Most disliked arc? Why?

Mutineers arc in MTMTE/LL. I feel like (whether due to early cancellation and/or JRO wasting time on too many side plots to give it its full depth), I dislike how the mutineers were basically boiled down to pure evil morons who are the most disgusting, despicable evil ever and the only reason the mutiny had Good Guys (TM) in it was because they were horribly misled and not because, you know, the mutiny was 100% a valid thing to have happened as retaliation against Rodimus and Megatron's captaincy.

Like, I'm not opposed to the idea of Getaway and his cronies being assholes (I personally thought Getaway was a GREAT slow-burn, puppet master villain/anti-hero), I just dislike how the quality of their writing degraded from MTMTE to LL. Felt like they (Getaway in particular) got passed the Idiot Ball and then the actual reasons behind the mutiny were never addressed, it was kind of just "oh Getaway died horribly so we're all friends now and we forgive each other and Rodimus/Megatron will just go back to being captains now."

11. Is there an unpopular character you like that the fandom doesn’t? Why?

You mean besides IDW Optimus because anyone who's been on my blog for like 5 seconds knows he's my biggest problematic fave skldfjskd

Uhhh I guess in the spirit of the previous question, Getaway. I feel like the fandom's hatred for him is overblown mainly bc it's a combination of Tailgate/Cyga/te fans going "HE GOT IN THE WAY OF C/YGA/TE AND ALMOST KILLED THAT PRECIOUS CINNAMON ROLL" and Rodimus or Megatron stans going "Getaway hates my fave?? But my fave is a good captain and deserves the world HE'S EVIL MY FAVORITE IS BEYOND CRITICISM OR REPROACH GETAWAY IS THE EMBODIMENT OF EVIL."

Like to me it seems as if the hate for Getaway isn't normal dislike or even people hating him because he's a well written villain. It feels weirdly like ppl really take Getaway's actions personally and hate him with the kind of passion you normally see reserved for actual real life horrible people. Or they like, see Getaway as an obstacle to [favorite character]'s happiness and not as an individual who, before the quality of his writing tanked, was actually an interesting character who maybe even had good points? It just feels like people mainly hate Getaway because he's the antagonist to more popular characters/ships and so they project their defense of their faves into virulently hating him.

13. Unpopular opinion about (Optimus)?

Honestly 90% or more of the fan content I see for Optimus is really boring/uncompelling to me, or really just comes off as out of character. It's either Optimus being reduced to an accessory to be shipped with someone (usually turned into some sort of moe cutesy uke type) or him being turned into.... idk some permutation of "feral irresponsible gremlin" or "One Of The Good Ones (TM)" or "anxiety-ridden damsel who needs to be rescued by his lover" or, in some circles, "character I project my issues with authority onto and try to frame as evil for things that aren't even evil."

Idk how to specifically describe it, it's just... a vibe? Most of the Optimus content I see doesn't actually feel like him at all. It feels like it's Optimus/Orion in name only, who got so separated from canon and distorted by fanon/flanderization/shipping/porn stereotypes that he now only vaguely resembles the character he's supposed to be.

20. What is the purest ship in the fandom?

Ahahaha I don't really go into the realm of pure ships honestly, plus this is the war criminal fandom where pretty much every character has killed people or committed crimes or is just generally scarred by war so uhhh

Idk I think Thundercracker/Melissa is a pretty hinged ship? They get along and cope surprisingly well with all the shit that happens. There's no angst or betrayals or misunderstandings or enemies, they're just very respectfully together. Sdfklsajfksd

25. How would you end (IDW1)/Would you change the ending of (IDW1)?

Honestly, I'm pretty satisfied with the ending of IDW1 on both sides of the story. On Barber's side I would've preferred if every single planet including Cybertron didn't get fucking eaten leaving them all stuck on Earth together, and I would've also kept Trypticon alive while... minimizing Slide's role, to say the least. I don't have a problem with Optimus' ending bc I actually think that Optimus' arc in Unicron is like, one of the few 1000% good things Barber wrote for him it's just. It's pure Optimus in his best form.

On JRO's side I would've cut out the last panel with the alternate Lost Light and left it ambiguous as to whether the quantum jump successfully copied the ship or not. I dislike the vibes of the canon ending that implied that everyone moving on with their lives (almost universally to new and exciting and happier places) was the "sad" ending and going on a permanent road trip is the "true, happy" ending. In the author's notes I think JRO said that he wanted to give the readers an ending that would allow them to imagine their faves continuing to go on adventures, but I think compromising a good ending to a story to appease fans is fucking stupid + fandom has never needed permission or approval from the author to write alternate, happy endings. So why ruin a poignant, melancholy ending about how endings come with new beginnings and sadness/nostalgia can be mixed with hope and happiness by going "sike lol they're all living happily ever after on their space cruise."

Also I wouldn't have randomly killed off Ratchet for no reason because like. What was that even supposed to accomplish. I'm no stranger to writing major character deaths but like. He just fucking died of disease off-screen and that was that??? Why, like what was the narrative/symbolic purpose of that besides just making the ending more sad? Maybe to emphasize how going back to Cybertron was the "bad ending" and the quantum Lost Light is the "good ending" since on the LL Ratchet is still alive? But see the paragraph above for why I don't like that.

26. Most shippable character?

The most shippable character to me is whichever character I think is the sexiest, because if I think they're sexy it makes me want to ship them with everyone. "Guards, fuck that man for me" etc etc. Lmao

[thevalleyoftriumph]

"He'll apologize after he's done here. Make it up to them somehow later, have a long talk with them about this." Assuming Dark did not execute cg/ they weren't there/ SOMETHING idk, and Dark was able to patch a very beaten and unconscious Chosen up and drag them back to the house, how would that conversation go? Would Beast take one look at Dark and attack him? Even if Killer or Chosen want to try diplomacy? Would They (one of the alters) wake up, realise their still in the house with the guy who is stronger than them and has harmed them, and book it? If so would Dark follow? Or let them leave Would they wake up to a note? Would one of them rip it up before the others have a chance to see it? Would they TRY diplomacy, only for the argument to immediately resume Theres so many possibilities, none of which can happen since Dark was blasted to kingdom come, BUT we can imagine for a moment

Oh man the convo would go so horribly so badly. Like let's be so honest Dark is the worst person to have a genuine and emotional conversation with he does NOT know what he's doing he's almost worse than Chosen 😭

I've never actually thought about this particular scenario before [as in it's actually like.. never crossed my mind somehow] so I can't really say for absolute certain what would happen, BUT . Let's indulge.

I think you're pretty right that if it were Beast still in front when they wake up, it'd probably immediately assume it was still in danger and attack Dark - that, or it'd absolutely book it the first chance it got, since it's not really looking for a repeat of the Virabot part of that whole thing. Sometimes it's just gotta do what's safest, and that doesn't always mean fighting back - sometimes it means retreat.

I think Chosen would still have some sort of faith in Dark and would like to stay and hear him out - and Killer by extension would, too, in a way. But both would be extremely hurt by everything and can be just as stubborn as Dark when they want to be, so it'd be pretty hard for them to not end up cutting him off a bunch to put their points in.

I think however, aside from Beast, Killer would also probably think about leaving. Maybe not forever, but definitely long enough to go sit outside and think about things for a while. They'd probably slip out when Dark is busy and he just comes back to them gone and briefly freaks out lol.

Honestly I'm certain the argument would just start back up eventually unless something changed REALLY fast you're totally right about that. These guys are sooo bad at emotions and Talking Things Out that it's almost comical if it wasn't borderline depressing.

HOWEVER ☝️ I think even during another argument, for Both of them their fight would just constantly be lingering in their minds - especially through Any Other Future Argument, the thought always rears itself back around. They're cautious of their actions, both of them - neither wants to get close during an argument anymore. If, say, Chosen instinctively tries to get closer - he stops, pulls back, then continues with what he was saying. It would do neither of them good if it got physical again, in fact thats the last thing EITHER of them want, so they do everything physically possible to remove even the possibility of an accident if they end up disagreeing about ANYTHING. No matter how small.

IDK THERES JUST SO MANY WAYS THIS COULD GO AND COULD EFFECT THEM ALL IF THEY DON'T HAVE THE TIME POST-SHOWDOWN TO HEAL FROM THEIR ISSUES. They love each other dearly and are each others best friend but they're also both so so so badly traumatized people and need a therapist SO much. So badly. Alas there's no therapists in the Outernet who work with cybercriminals who had a hand in nearly destroying their world unfortunately. 😔

[reidslovely]

idk My maladaptive daydream scenarios have been thinking about Toxic! Peter and whatnot.

Like him being like that bc of Gwendy’s death (but before he was like that too- with there on and off relationship 😒). So him and reader have an on and off thing going on and reader is tired of his shit and finally breaks up w/ him . And at first he’s like “pssh yeah whatever” but a few months to a year go by and he realizes how bad he fucked up. Maybe he gets Spider-man to woo her over or maybe jus regular old peter.

Sorry this was so long, like I said it was a maladaptive day dream scenario so its been on reply in my mind. I really love your writing by the way and hope you’re back for our Spider-boy like you said in your post 🩷🩷🩷🩷🩷

hi friend!! i am back for our spider-boy and i'm so sooo happy to be back thank you guys for welcoming me back 🩶🩶🩶. and honestly...toxic peter has been on my mind too recently especially after rewatching tasm 2 because what the fuck peter???

he dumps gwen after graduation and he's so pathetically lonely and yeah he follows gwen around but it doesn't really do anything for him. so he wonders off and finds some fucked up solace in his next door neighbor who had always had a thing for him. he just shows up on her doorstep playing the role of kicked puppy so well, she can't help but to let him back in and let it be how it was before Gwen came in senior year and she got all of his attention. Peter takes her on romantic dates, sweet long kisses, fun jokes one week but the next it's like she doesn't exist to him (definitely slips up calling her gwen on occasion.) especially after he and Gwen start talking again, but Peter still has her on the side.

One night he's ready to sneak in her window, that she usually leave unlocked for him, ready to make up being gone for so many weeks. But it's locked. He knocks on the door, his eyebrows furrowed motioning to the lock pulling it, but not hard enough because he could easily break that lock if he really wanted. "baby open the window come on." he teases. "I said I was sorry, come on."

he's playing kicked puppy again, and she almost lets him in. "Come on she doesn't want me, you do." "that's the reason you want me. you don't love me peter, you don't even know me anymore." "you're being fucking ridiculous" he laughs waiting for a moment seeing her not even budging from her spot on the bed. "open the window (y/n)" he says his voice loosing its humor. "go home peter, im over it." she said closing the curtains on him. and he doesn't care. at least he convinces himself he doesn't care. it was her loss, he was a fucking catch. all he did this whole time was respect her and she was blowing this up. except till the one person he had outside of her dies right in front of him. he lost gwen completely this time, there is no comeback there is no way to redeem himself. and he actually starts to see the monster he's become. he hurt gwen multiple times and she was still willing to give him the benefit of the doubt every time. he even thinks of (y/n) time to time and how badly he treated her because he was wrapped up in himself and what was best for him. he watched her a lot in his six months of bedroom grieving, like how he would with gwen. he watched her sit out on her roof writing or doing work, he watched her leave for work and come home at night. they locked eyes one night when he was standing on his roof, about to change into the suit for the first time in months. he thought he even saw her smile at him like she used too. it definitely take a toll on him because though this alone time was needed to help him process, but he missed being cradled by her. missed the way her hands tangled in his hair, missed when she'd laugh to make him smile. he did miss her, but she'd never accept that. it takes three weeks to the day, till he is on her window again, sweat clung to his forehead, his mask torn and exposing crucial parts of his face. he didn't even get to knock on the window before she's helping him in, sitting him on the floor pulling the mask off his face. he's crying from pain and regret, apologies spewing out of his mouth. she gets the mask off his face, asking him what he needs. He shakes his head holding her hand that's on applying pressure to his bleeding ribs. "need you." "god even in times like this all you wan.." "-to forgive me. 'm sorry so sorry. I do..do care about you. you're the only person I wanted..wanted to see-" "you're gonna wind yourself peter, we can talk about this later. what do you need?" "like fifteen tylenol, my body will heal it's self." she, though argues him not needing to take that many tylenol, gets him what he asks for and helps him change while wrapping his ribs. they end the night with heartfelt conversations, and peter swearing he'll spend the rest of his life making this up to her, and showing her what he really deserves.

yeah..this has been brewing. so sorry if you were not asking me to write, I started and couldn't stop lmao thank you for sharing your daydream with me friend and trust me no worries about the length I'm also longwinded 🫶🏼

[my-castles-crumbling]

hi Cas ! how are you ?

I'm struggling in the romance department right now lmao so I thought you might have some advice :(

Basically there is this girl I really REALLY like. We met through a friend three years ago, but in person only a year ago. Seeing her in person literally changed me I never liked someone this much like I was BEWITCHED or something. We only spent two days together and we only had one kiss, but I never managed to get her out of my head.

I never saw her again because she left to study abroad for a year. Now she's back in my country but we live a bit far away so I haven't seen her. When she was abroad we kept talking and flirting etc. But at one point she told me she had met somebody and that she wanted to try with him. It ended up not working and she reached out to me after some time, so we began talking (and flirting) again.

The thing is, for a few weeks now I feel like she isn't exactly flirting with me anymore. Except she kinda is. She is a writer and she has a writing instagram account where she posted poems that are clearly romantic but also clearly not about me. At least I really don't think so. It feels like a knife in the heart everytime. To be noted that usually if not always she does write about personal things that are really happening. So I'm pretty sure there is someone else in her mind. Which is fine because we didn't promise each other anything. But she is still replying to my stories etc and saying things that could pass as friendly but only if we didn't have history you know ? Like she's making lesbian jokes (i'm also a girl).

So the mixed signals are killing me. I also don't understand bc she said something about the guy before, but she didn't say anything this time. I feel like maybe she .... keeps her options open. (which is fine btw, I'm just unsure if she's still into me or not) I can't exactly ask her because we don't talk a lot (I'm so bad at keeping in touch if I have nothing specific to say yk?) and I don't want to come off as intrusive.

I would really like to see her in person so maybe we could talk and/or I could understand better where her heart is at. But being so unsure I don't want to propose a date or something bc I feel like it would be really out of the blue right now, and one of us would have to take the train and sleep at the other's place, so it feels like a lot and something she could refuse easily so I really don't feel comfortable doing that. I want it to be clear that I'm still into her bc I don't know if she is aware of it (it's obvious imo but I know she has confidence issues and at one point she thought I didn't care) but I also don't want to come off too strong and scare her away, and/or get rejected (not sure my heart could take it right now😭)

So I'm thinking maybe an outing with friends (we have several in common now) but again it is complicated bc everyone lives far away. Also she doesn't talk to one of them anymore, and that friend coul take it very badly if she's not invited so that would be a whole other mess (but honestly that friend is annoying and quite toxic and has a lot of issues so... I'm trying not to think too much of that)

Anyway I'm really lost, I really don't to give up on her, like it hurts a lot to think about, but also I feel like maybe she isn't as invested as I am. I would 100% take a train to the other side of the country to see her but I fear she isn't even thinking about that. Maybe I'm paranoid though. Also I think it's not so bad if someone isn't completely in it from the beginning, like some people are more guarded and careful than me and it's okay.

I don't know if you'll be able to help me, but I'd really like to hear your opinion on this. Thanks a lot <3

Hi!!! <3

What you said at the end is exactly what I was thinking though- maybe she's just guarded or nervous? I think you should try to give little hints or like...idk suggest meeting somewhere maybe? See how she reacts? Maybe she's just as nervous, if not more nervous than you. If she's iffy about it, it'll make it clear to you that she just wants to be friends. But if she jumps at the chance, then that's your sign. And even if you can't meet in person, maybe try being a bit more forward? I know it's scary but like...you have to know! You don't have to all-out ask her out, just be a bit more flirty and see if she reciprocates. You said you've kissed in the past so in my opinion, that means there's hope, you know?

Good luck! Naming you train anon.

[descendinginto-madness]

Some more Welt rambles because he lives in my head rent free

Contains spoilers for his hi3 lore?? Himeko's too ig but these are more just implications than anything else

If you think i mischaracterized him or something i wrote here really doesn't fit him pls bear with me I'm just a silly little person writing silly little rambles about some fictional grandpa idk HAHAH but! Let's move on now because oooooooh

First of all. Something that I enjoy picturing with my oc (because obviously i put them on the Express what did u expect) but can work with the MC, Dan Heng or March 7th as well because he's the trio's dad I don't make the rules. Like... Welt being a protective father figure for them but not just in a "please take care of yourself" way (though that too, obviously, especially when he sees one of them clearly sleep deprived again) but also in a "you mess with my child and I'm gonna fuck you up" way; like letting some of his HI3 attitude slip through again. Like maybe one of the trio is badly wounded in battle and he immediately jumps to shield them, obviously with his own body, and he's ready to attack whoever or whatever hurt them. Maybe he sees one of them being attacked, or about to be, and he joins the battle like "hands off of my child." (Honestly that line lives in my head rent free as well idk why it's just so father figure.)

Dan Heng mentions in his voice line about Welt that he doesn't pry. And yes, he doesn't; even when he's worried, he only asks if everything's alright, or if they want to talk about something. But when someone comes up to him, he's more than happy to provide support - whether it's some actual advice or just a simple hug, or just someone who will sit and listen to all of the rambles and complaints without judging. He's happy that the trio relies on him and trusts him, even if he has moments where he feels so responsible for them that it's overwhelming. But he would probably protect the Astral Express crew with his life; and if it meant sacrificing himself to make sure they would be safe, he would do it.

Speaking of hugs, I also think he really likes them? I think he would like physical contact in general, even though he probably wouldn't admit it. A part of the reason may be the fact that he lost his body at least once from what I remember (Second Eruption manga from HI3) and even if (iirc) it was part of the plan, and something he knew may happen, I don't believe he wasn't affected by it. Physical contact helps him ground himself - but then again, he also won't say anything if he needs comfort or anything like that. He pretty much refuses to show vulnerability in front of the crew - after all, they rely on him so much! So he thinks he can't show it when he's feeling lost or just... Not having a good time in general. The only exception is probably Himeko, though even when he's alone with her showing vulnerability doesn't come easily to him. Of course he wants to protect her as well - maybe even feels doubly responsible for her in this universe, considering what happened to her in HI3.

To sum this up, I just think his self-sacrifice issues from HI3 are still there in HSR even if a bit toned down, and in a somewhat different form, and also he refuses to ask for help ever.

Also I am normal about him. :3

[silvreflames]

Rio! I have a random question about nesta as a girl who grew up overly pushed and forced into "feminine perfection" by her mom, how did she experience the realization that she couldnt fulfill those toxic expectations that her mom forced on her because of her own trauma and the what the cauldron did to her? Not me asking bc of my own mommy issues lmao sorry if you already talked abt this here! Also idk if i made any sense wiith this question in my head i did

euge my darling i could kiss you on the mouth. i've been sitting on this ask for like 2 weeks now because it's just so juicy and i've been wanting to do it (and nesta) justice in how i answer it with regards to my portrayal.

honestly? i don't think nesta HAS come to this realization. and i say this because i don’t think she is in a space mentally or emotionally to understand that those expectations ARE toxic. certainly not in a canon world LMAO but not really in my interpretation either. i think that the rotten roots that her mother dug into her at such a young age are so deep that it will likely take decades for nesta to really even understand just how badly she's been harmed. and the canon treatment she receives at the hands of the IC absolutely does not go far in mending the mindset she's been brainwashed into either.

i mean. people can talk about how prythian doesn't uphold the patriarchal ideals that the human world does because it's an entirely different culture and species but the fact of the matter is that that's just complete bogus. men rule prythian. and you can argue that amarantha was in charge and blah blah blah the human queens blah blah blah but the fact of the matter is, tamlin wasn't putting feyre down when he told her there weren't high ladies among the fae. he was simply stating a fact. viviane of winter court (arguably an incredible leader considering the winter court did not sway under amarantha's rule while kallias was under the mountain) was clearly slighted when rhysand made feyre the first high lady.

and don't even get me started on the treatment of illyrian women. the abuse that those young girls and women are subjected to by illyrian men (rhysand's people!) is very close to the treatment that nesta expects as someone who grew up knowing that her only fate, the only role she would fit into, was that of a submissive wife to ensure her family's care. that those women are being violated so horribly because it's "tradition" just further proves to her that safety is not an option. that freedom is not an option.

all that to say, nesta can't break out of those expectations because she doesn't have the tools or the knowledge to be able to do it. not even when she goes to live in the supposedly amazing world of the fae that her baby sister so dearly loves. she is forced into “fae ideals” which are not far off from what she’s already familiar with. she is “promised” (mated) to a man for the “good of her family” (the IC/rhys/feyre) whether she wants to be or not and “society” (the IC) expects her to stay quiet and accept it and do it beautifully and to stop being in pain so loudly. because that’s feminine perfection of course!

i think that. even if she DID realize this. she would be in deep denial. lune and i are giving nessian the story that they deserve, but trauma is trauma. and like i said it’s going to take a long time for nesta to uncover how badly she’s been hurt for so long. but even just uncovering it won’t “fix” or help her. there are so many layers to the way her mother’s expectations cut away at her (and continue and will continue to do so!).

i believe nesta knows her mother was cruel, but she wouldn’t believe she’s been harmed without reason. which is why, even realizing that the expectations foisted on her were terrible and she couldn’t meet them if she really tried, she would simply be devastated that she could fail so badly. because that’s all she does in her own eyes, you know? she failed her mother, she failed her sisters, she failed her father, she fails cassian, she fails herself. she wouldn't think, "gee i shouldn't have been treated like shit like that", she'd think, "wow i can't believe i became high fae and i still can't manage to take care of my fucking family". i think it would be a setback in her healing and she’d have to climb those stairs too.

[atcarpenter]

Definitely and Tara is willing to try some pretty extreme stuff to appease her girlfriend. It can lead to some odd scenarios where Tara threatens NOT to get rough with her later if she doesn't behave at which point Amber immediately becomes subservient

No one else understands their dynamic and they're pretty sure they don't want to either

Tara would even confess that to Sam who is utterly heartbroken and guilt ridden at Tara thinking that and reassure her that it was never her fault and Tara was the only reason she stayed as long as she did and she wanted so badly to stick around but Sam knew she could never forgive herself if she ever did anything to hurt her sister

It was even worse with their dad gone as he had a somewhat better relationship with his daughters than Christina and made things a little easier and after he left, things got much worse. Tara has forgiven Sam but doesn't think she'll ever be able to forgive her dad for leaving her with Christina

Amber only gets a few details at first, Tara saying she prefers to be at Amber's house as her mom is not easy to be around, but she picks up that something worse is going on when she sees Tara is genuinely frightened of her. Amber reassures her that she doesn't have to say anything and just hugs her tightly

The worst part is that part of Tara still loves her and wishes they could have worked things out and blames herself for not trying harder.

Sam and Tara both blame themselves for so much and Amber does her best to reassure both that Christina's issues are not their fault

Definitely and they each get a chance to choose something to watch. Amber and Mindy usually go for an old school horror classic, something by John Carpenter, Chad will go for something more modern like The Conjuring films, Tara will always try and find an old or obscure horror film to show off her movie buff credentials and Sam usually goes for a horror comedy like Ready Or Not or Jennifer's Body or Death Becomes Her which is one of her favorite movies

For Halloween treats, Tara makes a trip to a British sweet shop as she and Amber discovered UK chocolate after moving to NYC and now refuse to go back to the American stuff. They love going in and coming out with a big bag of Maltesers, chocolate Buttons, Galaxy bars, Wispa bars and other treats which they share with the others. Sometimes.

Nope and she will happily fall asleep lying on you as she has done with Sam and Amber many times. Not that either mind, of course

She was but being around Tara again has made things a lot easier as the two have always made a point of showing affection to each other because they knew they were never going to get it from Christina

Amber even offers to hug Sam on the condition that no one ever know and it lasts only a few seconds. Sam happily agrees and just smiles when Amber threatens to kill her if she says anything

Amber still thinks she has a reputation as the tough girl from Brooklyn but everyone now knows she's a big softie underneath it

Yeah, honestly, I think Tara would be open to try lots of stuff at least once or twice with her because she trusts her implicitly. But also I love the idea of Tara threatening Amber with a gentle time, and Amber is like "Oh no, the horrors" and immediately caves 😂 Even though she normally likes the gentle stuff too. Idk they're versatile

They understand each other perfectly, and that's what matters, so no one else has to

Sam is devastated once she learns about all the doubts Tara had. But once they actually have that conversation, it goes a long way for both of them to heal from that period

That's very valid of Tara. He was still her dad and eight-year-old Tara did not deserve to be forever cut off from him, and Sam didn't either. But now Sam is Tara's stand-in dad, and she's much better, even if her biological dad was decent for the short period in her life that he was actually around

That's so sweet 💙 I love Amber like that. She gets more and more details slowly over time, and it honestly gets kinda grizzly somedays when she sees the state Tara's in or when Tara tells her of something that happened with Christina

I think both Sam and Tara carry those feelings well into adulthood, but Amber's no-bullshit "it's all her fault" attitude helps a lot when they're doubting these things again

I like those movie choices for them, and it reminds me I need to make my own movie marathon sometime soon

:D I like that they hog the sweets. They share, but only if they want to. And preferring the UK chocolate is so valid

They both love when Tara falls asleep on them. Amber sometimes goes, "Sorry, Sam, can't cook tonight, Tara fell asleep on me. Not my fault." And Tara is undisputedly the best blanket

Getting that hug from Amber means a lot to Sam. She would have been happy with just taking the one, but despite her initial threats, Amber starts offering more of them, without the stipulation they only last a few seconds, but she still refuses to let the others know about the hugging. Secretly, she likes the hugs too, however. Tara and Sam both love that she is secretly a big softie

[clotpolesonly]

@morocorra BET YOU THOUGHT I FORGOT ABOUT THIS

well, i definitely did not, let's talk about Adam impersonating Gansey

so there's a lot to unpack here, obviously, and i am of two minds on the matter. well, ok, i'm of more than two minds. at least three or four minds. i'm conflicted, is what i'm saying here. there are pros and cons to this whole little sequence.

let's start out with the obvious: it was SO unnecessary. they literally didn't have to do this. it doesn't line up with anything in book canon and it didn't serve much of a practical purpose within the show canon that couldn't have been covered elsewhere.

if i recall correctly, in the books, the information about Whelk's father's embezzlement was given to the reader through the narration in Whelk's POV chapters. we don't get that kind of exposition handed to us on screen, we need to see and/or hear it more directly somehow, but it would've been fairly easy to either show it as part of the Noelk flashback sequence or to just have Noah or Whelk outright tell us/another character about it.

usually i'm all for showing and not telling, but sometimes it really is as simple as "my dad got arrested, the bank took all our money, i needed the glendower favor to get it back". instead of using up 20 minutes of screentime on having a main character sneak off, disguise himself as someone else, charm his way into city hall to illegally access police records that i don't think realistically would even be available at city hall in the first place, and then bring that same information back to his friends while refusing to provide them with any context on where or how he got it.

(honestly, he probably could've just fucking googled the Whelk name. was there no press coverage for this at all? come on, man)

so anyway, none of this needed to happen. like, i can see why they thought it might've been a more interesting way to convey that information, but really it just robbed us of a lot of their already very limited screentime. they crammed two whole books into 8 episodes and wasted our time with THIS??

on top of that, it's just........it's absolute UNHINGED behavior. i've seen some people say that it feels out of character for Adam and, yeah, honestly, i agree, at least to a degree.

it's not that book!Adam doesn't want to wear Gansey like a skinsuit. he absolutely does and he's really fucking weird about it. he gets to harvard and cosplays as Gansey so hard that even Ronan is like "dude wtf are you doing" but the thing is, book!Adam would never do it consciously and intentionally. that boy would rather chew his own arm off than recognize/acknowledge/admit how badly he wants to BE Richard Campbell Gansey III. he would literally rather die.

so for him to be on our screens, dying his hair dark and stealing Gansey's clothes and wallet and introducing himself as Dick Gansey to state employees is WILD and feels so so wrong. like, no offense to the writers, but Book!He Would Not Fucking Say That.

-sigh-

however. canon is canon, and he did, in fact, fucking say that on our screens. and i'm gonna be real here, it makes tv!Adam look even more like a complete fucking sociopath than book!Adam ever did adlkjfgh. like, what a batshit psychosexually charged immoral thing for him to do. especially because not only did he use Gansey's name while committing a crime, but he also used Gansey's influence, name-dropped his mother, and promised the county clerk a FAVOR from a US senatorial candidate if she broke the law for him. idk if that's ever gonna come back up again, if it's gonna be relevant and cause problems in later seasons, but even if it doesn't, dude, that's fucked up!!!! wtf lol

...........SO THERE'S ALL THAT

but then, on the other hand

i really enjoyed Adam being a conniving manipulative amoral little mastermind on my television screen, not gonna lie, adlkfjhg

and we know the real crowning glory of this whole ordeal!! hence the tags!!! we knew i was coming back around to this XD

when this show as first announced, i didn't have a lot of hope for the Adam/Declan parallels surviving to screen. many of them were purely textual, phrases and descriptions used for both of them that stand out starkly because of how they're written but wouldn't carry over as well to a visual medium (ie, they weren't born afraid but they learned). i was emotionally prepared to lose those and just make do.

AND THEN THE SHOW WENT OUT OF ITS WAY TO INVENT A WHOLE NEW PARALLEL THAT'S EVEN MORE UNHINGED THAN ANYTHING THE BOOKS COULD'VE GIVEN ME

i cannot believe that they made a big change to Declan's character and then also made a corresponding change to Adam's that matches Declan's deviation from canon, like did they do that one purpose?? is it a coincidence??? it can't be a coincidence, surely

okay i'll cop that it's not a perfect parallel. or, i'd say, it's both a parallel and a contrast.

we didn't get to see Declan going blond or making that decision, we don't know if it was a trauma-fueled impulse like him re-dying it dark was or if it was a choice made with a little more poise and composure, but either way it was something entirely intrinsically motivated. he did it for him, even though it caused him problems and he likely knew that it would, while Adam dying his hair dark (temporarily, it's only a level 1 dye, the kind that washes out pretty quickly, and we see that it's gone by the next episode and no one else is any the wiser about what he did) is externally motivated and for a practical purpose. it's part of a scheme rather than something that he feels emotionally driven to do as part of a coping process.

but even that says so much about them as people. Declan likes to claim that he's so rational and detached, but underneath the facade he wears, he's as impulsive and passionate as Ronan is. his emotions lead him far more often than he wants to admit even to himself. both instances of his hair fuckery are driven by emotional overwhelm, and both are permanent changes (for a given value). you can't unbleach hair that has been bleached, and level 3 dye takes weeks or months to fade. and he owns his choices in the aftermath because, as the books say, Lynches always want to be seen as deliberate, even if it's deliberately cruel or, in this case, deliberately with bad taste in aesthetic choices (lmao).

meanwhile, Adam truly is a much more rational thinker. even when he feels strong emotion, he examines it and picks it apart and makes a real effort toward not acting on it. regardless of his emotional state, on the whole, he is driven by thought and logic. he dyes his hair because his appearance is a tool to be utilized to achieve an end - in this case, accessing information that he wouldn't be able to if he presented as himself. Gansey has clout that he doesn't, and thus taking on Gansey's appearance and name allows him to leverage that clout for his own ends. and when that end is achieved, Adam takes off the disguise. he rinses the dye out of his hair. he is himself again.

through this whole metamorphosis, Adam never loses his sense of self. he is playing Gansey's role, yes, but it's a costume and he knows it is and he takes it off when he's done. but Declan doesn't have a solid sense of self. his identity is a fractured mess, and he has to go through another external process in an effort to regain what he'd stripped away from himself. he cannot unbleach his hair, he has to dye it dark again in an attempt to match his natural color. even when he's trying to be himself, he's still pretending.

if i were to read even more too much into this (😂) i would say this could also be representative of their stations in life and how they feel about themselves -- ie, Declan has the means to make whatever changes he wants, he can live any life he likes (in theory), but none of it means anything if he doesn't know who he is or how to be that person in an authentic way. and Adam feels like, as much as he can play at being better than his roots, in truth he will always be what he is and no amount of slapping paint on top is ever going to change him. from dust he came and to dust he will return. Declan cannot decide if he wants to look like his father or not, that association is fraught and complicated for him and the push-pull of it is tearing him apart, and Adam desperately aspires to distance himself from the father he resembles but believes, deep down, that there is no escaping their similarity.

it makes the monmouth gatekeeping scene spicy in its own weird way, at least for me. it's the only time these two are face to face on screen with nothing else going on around them, just the two of them going head to head. the natural blond and the fake. i have to wonder if that scene is where Adam got the idea for his own brunet adventure. after all, he learned how to flirt from observing and copying Declan, why shouldn't he get tips on pretending to be someone he's not from Declan too? he did it first and he does it best, after all.

[mountainscouts]

stary ideas ….. i feel like gary brings out the best in stan and makes him want to be a better person, while stan brings out the “worst” in gary by irritating him or something, haha.

just imagine stan being his usual self, and gary suddenly bursting out something like “god, will you just can it already!?” and then going on a large rant about how he doesn’t know how someone can be so self-absorbed, etc… and stan being… possibly completely enamored with this. idk, just think about it. thoughts ? would be fun to write about or just daydream of lol.

i would love to hear about what you think of their dynamic, though ! i really enjoy longer discussions on characters and their relationships with others, just because of how subjective and interpretive it is, therefore being more interesting.

i absolutely LOVE character/relationship analysis, honestly. like, urgh, yes this is south park but god sometimes the base personalities of these characters could be so interpretive like you said.

i also love this idea tbh, it totally coincides with how i picture their dynamic to be. stan definitely is inspired by gary to be a better person with how charitable of a person he is and how much hope he has in stan that stan cant say he has for himself. i feel like stan lacks plenty ambition and is relatively go-with-the-flow later on to a detriment, and gary can act as some sort of stable anchor in his life. it's no question that stan would put gary on some sort of pedestal, but not out of acute resentment or hardcore adoration— but because of the differences between them. in due time, i'm sure stan will realize his worth with the help of gary. but of course he will never stop being in awe of him and his actions. there will almost always be some sort of dissonance between the two, but because of how much they connect, they will work through it.

now for gary showing his "worst" around stan. i think i understand what you mean. gary, to me, is someone who was raised to stay composed and calm. those traits are very inherent to his nature, but his patience rarely ever runs thin— which may sound nice, but it's not. being taught that rash & negative emotions were bad, and to keep those emotions at bay, definitely damaged his psyche. he probably doesn't allow himself to get mad, and when he does— it's a whole thing for him.

imagine they get into an argument about stan's character, like you said, and gary bursts out at stan in similar vein to the piece of dialogue you wrote. stan is definitely caught off guard by gary's anger because it's just so rare of him to lash out like that. he's definitely mesmerized. it honestly parallels to the end of s7012, where gary tells stan how it is while he just stands there like :o

stan at that moment, would know he fucked up badly. and as much as hes shit at diffusing a situation, the need to make things right is more apparent than ever. obviously, stan can't change overnight and with the flip of a dime, but its situations like this where that aforementioned inspiration to be better comes from. while this may sound twisted, gary ends up appreciating what stan does for him— including getting him that angry.

that may sound... weird... but gary definitely has problems about showing how he truly feels, and while stan may bring out the "worst" in him, he knows that these intense emotions are from a place of deeply caring about stan and wanting to see him get better. of course, the two end up apologizing but i can imagine after their conversation gary goes, "thank you for being one of the only real things in my life." or something like that. idk.

[ed-recovery-affirmations]

Hey, so I have a situation going on (TW for extensive discussion of ED):

So I'm in recovery but sometimes I still relapse, especially during the fall and winter months, idk why but those are just the worst for me in terms of ED. My roommate and acquaintance knows that I've been battling ED for most of my life and before I moved in with her and other flatmates, I told everyone that I am in recovery and that I need them not to comment on my food (be it choices that seem disordered but are actually improvements to my previous situation, or idk my portion sizes for example).

Despite that, this roommate, who is currently going through an eating disorder and is in therapy for it, keeps commenting on my food. She keeps judging how much I eat, keeps asking me questions about why I eat what I eat (eg. Sometimes there are days when I just won't eat something I haven't made. I just can't. And she'll just keep asking why. It's not malicious but she doesn't take the hint when I say "well you know...due to the problems" and essentially forces me to just outright say that I can't eat it because I don't have control over it and the ingredients, which is both a frankly embarrassing thing to say and most of the time she doesn't really get it either), and sometimes says things like "Idk how you eat like that and aren't fat lol" (which usually occurs when I have like...a slice of bread with jam or something, which is, mind you, also usually my only food of the day because I am too busy for my own good, and because my meds cause me not to have an appetite).

Worse than that, she vents about her ED problems to me constantly. I get that maybe she needs someone outside of therapy to talk about it with, but it makes me really close to relapsing every time. She'll come home and start saying things like "I weighed myself yesterday and lost another X kg" and "A guy ranted to me about how he wanted to lose weight, like duh he should be happy, he might need it for when he's like me, who hasn't eaten in 3 days." and "I've been so bad today but it's probably a good thing because the 4 days before that I didn't eat at all."

I don't know how to gently reaffirm my boundaries and tell her that it's affecting me really badly when she says such things to me. I don't want to be too firm or mean, and I understand that she's going through bad stuff, but I'm not in a place where I could listen to it without it fucking me up badly.

Honestly, I think you've given your roommate the benefit of the doubt for too long. She doesn't "forget" she's triggering you. She's subtly doing it on purpose. She doesn't "not pick up on" your hints about why you're uncomfortable. She's enjoying making you uncomfortable. I usually do not advise people to think in such a paranoid fashion, but I truly believe the writing is on the wall here. As someone who has given others the benefit of the doubt for too long and gotten hurt for it, I feel obligated to say this.

Anon, those of us who have eating disorders are often unwell in other ways. We often have trauma and difficult relationships and other issues. And we're often competitive in our eating disorders, which is a real risk. Many of us try to show off being the "sickest" or make it a game, sometimes. And you are ABSOLUTELY allowed to be too firm and "too mean" in defending your health. Her going through stuff does NOT justify her putting you through stuff, and that's a lesson all of us who have mental illness need to learn - both in regard to what we put up with, and what we may make others put up with.

So listen. A successful boundary is not a statement of "you can't do X." Attempting to control the behavior of others is useless. Instead, think of a boundary (and speak your boundaries) in terms of "if you do X, I will do Y to protect myself." And do be prepared to follow through on that consequence. As one of my favorite TikTok therapists once said, "a boundary without consequences for violating it isn't a boundary, it's more of a fancy request."

If you're stuck in the lease and don't have the option of moving away from this girl, here's what you can do to get by for now. Make a list of all the things she has done to trigger your ED, and make a list of responses that will be protective for you. Then, have a kind but firm talk with her about how she constantly triggers your ED and how you will be taking the following measures to take care of your mental health. Let her know you're not trying to be hurtful but for your protection, these are non-negotiable. Things like "If you continue to make comments about what is on my plate, I will take my plate and leave the room." or "If you continue to vent to me about your eating disorder, I will hang out with you less."

She may try to act the victim. Do not be swayed by this. No matter how she feels about this talk, nothing is worth sacrificing your mental health, and it is her own responsibility to learn to take care of her own mental health WITHOUT hurting others, as we all must learn to do. Tell her that you want for her to have someone to talk to about this, but that someone cannot be you. She has done this multiple times. This isn't a mistake at this point, and honestly, you're not doing her a favor by letting her go without learning how to hold herself accountable for respecting the boundaries of others. But more importantly, you're not doing yourself any favors by teaching yourself that it's okay to let others hurt you because they're having a hard time. Your hard times matter too, anon.

Best of luck in the roommate stuff and in making it through the winter.