#idk what john was on in the first episode—this line and the ‘your whimpering is awfully distracting’ one

[sawthoone]

“you can’t see this, but you have the cold, calculated demeanor of someone not to fuck with.”

[alwaysahiccupandastrid]

His Dark Materials - Season 2 Episode 7 *FINALE* (Thoughts and Rambles)

We have a LOT to unpack here oh my god oh my god

When I say I was screaming and yelling during the episode, I mean I was LITERALLY screaming and yelling

This post is mostly screeching and capital letters, you’ve been warned

“So cold” “life or death meant nothing” - well shit. Accurate description of a Spectre attack damn

I didn’t know what those creepy noises were at first and I was sat here absolutely TERRIFIED because it was creepy as fuck. Then I realized it was cliff ghasts because they said something that I recognized from the book and I was like “oh shit”

Pan and Will talking is the sweetest omg

The fact that Pan told him that Lyra thinks he’s as brave as King Iorek Byrnison :’)

“She’s the best friend I’ve ever had” “You’re her best friend too” - STOP, MY HEART

Lyra was awake and heard the whole conversation :3

“I’m no longer an aeronaut” :( “I’m an insect” - LMAO

Hester and Lee’s banter remains my favourite thing and now it’s bittersweet tbh...

“You could never be an insect, Lee” “Okay, hare” - bless them

Marisa finding where Lyra was staying and then finding Lyra’s coat?? And crying with it pressed to her face?? :’(

In case I haven’t mentioned it already, I am incredibly gay for the witches/their aesthetic/costume. Absolutely beautiful queens, all of them

Oh hi, it’s Mary and the two kids!

The fact that Mary helped them find their adults :’)

Also, “We like you miss” - BLESS

I’m kind of confused as to whether the blue flower petals are important or if it’s just her smelling them? IDK

“I’m close to my father, it’s time I found him” - OOF OKAY UMM ARE YOU SURE

“I let my best friend down” - Noooo Lyra, no you didn’t! :( Your dad is a terrible parent and killed him, that’s not your fault!

“Maybe this is how I let you down” - Well done, Asriel and Marisa, you’ve fucked up a perfectly fine child is what you’ve done

Will telling Lyra that she hasn’t let him down :3

That witch turning up because she was trying to warn Marisa about the spectres, only for Marisa to torture and kill her... oof

FUCKING MONKEY I CAN’T DECIDE HOW I FEEL ABOUT HIM

“She’s MY daughter” - Okay, damn, lady...

“EVE. She’s the mother of all” - OH FUCK YOU TOLD HER. OH FUCK OH FUCK OH FUCK

THE SPECTRE ATE HER DÆMON OMG NO THIS IS HORRIFYING WTAF

Seriously, the way the witch went so grey and lifeless and just fell to her knees and down... Urgh, my stomach is turning

Just when I thought I hated the monkey again, he starts whimpering because he’s afraid of the Spectres :(

“Stop whimpering” - DAMN MARISA YOU ARE A STONE COLD BITCH HUH

Pan being the damn voice of reason and telling Lyra they should stay with the witches like yes, Lyra, listen to him for once!!!

Okay but why are the Magisterium soldiers lowkey dressed like German soldiers from one of the World Wars???

I’m not really surprised that BBC left out the detail of Ruta and Asriel fucking when she found him to be honest XD

So the witches think that the Æsahættr is a person but it’s actually the KNIFE. AND THEY DON’T REALIZE. RUTA YOU DON’T NEED TO GO ANYWHERE, IT’S LITERALLY RIGHT THERE

“...That’s not my dæmon.” “Run.” - OH SHIT OKAY MY WHOLE BODY JUST TENSED UP

So umm Lee got shot and FUCK NO FUCK NO I’M NOT READY FOR THIS EMOTIONALLY THANKS

I LITERALLY DO NOT WANT THIS TO HAPPEN OKAY

“You’re either with me or against me” Umm he’s your dæmon?!?!

THE WAY SHE SCREAMED AT HIM OH MY GOD SHE’S FUCKING TERRIFYING HOLY CRAP

“What are you frightened of?” - oh, I don’t know, Marisa, maybe because YOU FUCKING SCREECHED AT HIM. MAYBE HE’S FRIGHTENED OF YOU

Also I love the detail of Marisa getting onto her hands and knees, sort of crouching and mirroring the monkey’s body language. I just love the parallel

The way the monkey flinched from her when she went to touch him omg :( No dæmon should be THIS afraid of their person (or at all?!?!)

Honestly, I find this series’ portrayal of Marisa fascinating tbh

“We have to do whatever it takes to keep her safe” - Umm, like maybe drugging her and hiding her in a cave for months? 🤔

Also in case I didn’t say this before, the fact she has complete control of the Spectres is fucking scary and always has been from the very first time I read the books

Okay so Lee is fully aware that he’s going to die if he stays behind but he does it because he knows that it’s the best chance of making sure that Lyra ends up under the knife’s protection (because Jopari will find her). All Lee wants is for Lyra to be safe and that hurts my heart so much, he loves this child so much :’(

“I love that little girl like a daughter” - LEE STOP MY HEART IS ALREADY BREAKING AS IT IS

NO NO NO NO I AM NOT AND NEVER WILL BE READY

Oh hey Red PAN-da (sorry I know I keep repeating that joke but honestly LOOK AT HIM)

“Once I change, you’ll stop changing” - OH SHIT. So we’re having THAT conversation then

“What do you think you’ll be?” “A flea I hope” - LMFAO I LOVE IT

“Is it Will that’s changing you?” “I think” - FORESHADOWING FOR AMBER SPYGLASS ANYONE?!

All the meanwhile, while Lee is dying and shit is going down, Ms Mary Malone is just chilling in a cave on a mountain by a waterfall, just reading

I literally struggled to watch Lee’s final scenes. I literally didn’t want to watch it because I cried reading it in the book, and I knew I’d be the same here

The fact that Lee HATES taking away people’s lives but he says “it’s theirs or Lyra’s”... I love him. He loves her so much.

“Think about anything, think about bacon!” - LMFAO I LOVE YOU HESTER YOU ABSOLUTE GEM

THE BULLET CLIPPED HIS SCALP AND I HAD A HEART ATTACK 

“This is my fault, isn’t it?” - NO HESTER NO DON’T YOU DARE BLAME YOURSELF DARLIN’, YOU ARE THE BEST AND WE LOVE YOU AND LEE LOVES YOU

I do this everytime I read the book and I did here even though I know what happens, but I was praying mentally that maybe Serafina would reach Lee in time... just maybe...

I’m really sitting here crying over Hester and Lee on a Sunday night, love that for me

Hester limping :(

“Don’t you go before I do” - FUCK YOU BBC AND PHILIP I’M SOBBING MY EYES OUT

“Oh how far we flew” - STOP IT. STOP IT RIGHT FUCKING NOW I SWEAR-

I literally yelled and cried out “NOOO” when Hester faded away and Lee died. I am so upset even though I KNEW it was coming. I am literally not okay.

Oh god no Will, now is not the time to be walking away from Lyra and that witch 

Also why is that witch asleep on guard?? Come on, love, do better, it’s not like these are the two most important children in all the universes.... 

To be fair to Marisa, I’d feel pretty invincible if I were climbing up a mountain while the Spectres were guarding me/on my side

WILL AND JOHN FINALLY MET AHHHH

“I was told I’d find my father here”  - YEAH AND THAT’S HIM WILL ASDFGHJKL;

I’m low-key disappointed that there’s no brawl between Will and Jopari here. Like they instantly recognize each other and... hmm. I know there has to be changes but still.

“Your mother, Will, where is she?” - Awww. John really didn’t stop loving her :’)

“My son... is the Knife Bearer” - oooooohhhhhhh

“You have a dæmon” - that’s right, Will. Don’t worry, you’ll get one next season

The way I audible went “oh shIT” when Mrs Coulter found Lyra fast asleep. Like I said, I knew what was going to happen but STILL

I’m not really surprised that those Spectres killed the witch who was supposed to be guarding Lyra and Will tbh like that’s what happens when only ONE witch guards two teenagers and that witch falls asleep

The way that Lyra panicked when she woke up and saw her mother stroking her cheek omg 

Off topic but I’ve only just realized that Jopari has a fucking man-bun LMFAO OKAY

The fact that Jopari tried to get back to Will and Elaine but couldn’t will always hurt me

“And you chose these people over your family?” - I MEAN-

“I’ve thought about you every day.” - Awww

So John tells Will that he has to go to Asriel and bring him the knife, and he tells him all about the war that’s coming and I have LITERAL chills because I’m so ready

“And then we go home?” “... And then we go home.” - RIP MY HEART OUT, IT WOULD HURT LESS

“I’m not strong enough” - yes you are, Will! I promise you, you are! And Jopari says, “Both of us were brought here” - exactly! You were brought there for a reason by fate or whatever you want to call it!

“Your duty was to be my father” - WILL REALLY CAME FOR HIS DAD LIKE THAT I GUESS

“Look what you’ve become without me” - Oh my god, just when I thought I wasn’t going to cry again

JOPARI HUGGING WILL, SEEING THE SOLDIER AIMING, AND THEN PUTTING HIMSELF BETWEEN THEM SO HE TOOK THE BULLET INSTEAD OF WILL ASDFGHJKL;

So in the book, Jopari is killed by a scorned witch who had once asked him to be her lover, but he had turned her down (because of Elaine and Will obviously), and she kills Jopari in front of Will and then he kills her (I think?). But here it’s just a soldier leftover from the Lee vs Magisterium fight, so... yeah. Kind of a little peeved about the change personally but whatever I guess.

“The night is full of angels, they will guide you now” - AHHHHH

Also, might just be me, but maybe that line would have been slightly more impactful if the scene had taken place at night

This show really said “fuck healthy parental figures” I guess

Except Will’s mum, she’s the best and if anything were to happen to her we’d all riot

SAYAN KÖTÖR FADING AWAY NOOOO I HATE SEEING DÆMONS DIE

Okay, last little gripe, but I just wanted to say that in the book, Will doesn’t realize it’s his dad until literally the last second before his dad dies - like they both realize and then BAM, Jopari is killed. And while I do love the father-son reunion, I am kind of annoyed by the change because it was such a huge punch in the gut in the book that Will searches for so long for his dad, only to lose him the second he finds him.

Serafina finding Lee’s body and kissing his forehead was yet another punch in the gut, thanks Pullman/BBC/BadWolf

The fact that Will had to bury his dad :(

Also, WILL WEARING JOPARI’S JACKET OH MY GOD MY HEART

Oof that shot of his amputated fingers...

So the narration, when it started I thought it was Jopari at first, like from one of his letters... but then as it continued, I went “hang on”, and then I said outloud “wait, is that ASRIEL?!”

DID MARISA REALLY PUT LYRA IN A FUCKING TRUNK?!? BITCH ARE YOU OKAY?!?

Will putting his hood up like his dad did just hits differently

Okay so um ASRIEL HI I WASN’T EXPECTING TO SEE YOU THIS SEASON OH MY GOD THE SCREAM I LET OUT

HIS MONOLOGUE BY THE WAY IS FUCKING ART AND A MASTERPIECE BUT I WAS TOO BUSY CRYING OVER JAMES MCAVOY TO WRITE THE WHOLE MONOLOGUE DOWN

Oh, hi Stelmaria!

It always makes me scream that this man is not only Lord Asriel now but he’s also fucking Mr Tumnus and MOTHERFUCKING BILL DENBROUGH LIKE HOW IS THIS MAN INVOLVED IN SO MANY OF MY FANDOMS?!?

ANGELS ANGELS OH MY FUCKING GOD-

“We stand with you, Asriel Belacqua” - AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

“Let us prepare for war” - FUUUUUUUUCK

(I was deadly serious when I said this was just me screaming and crying by the way)

I’m still reeling over the fact that Marisa put her daughter in a fucking trunk. Like I get you can’t exactly carry a drugged child about in the open but Jesus Christ, love, really?!?

Also Ruth Wilson / Marisa Coulter in a headscarf? *chef kiss*

The way that the screen went to black as she put the lid on the trunk down - SHIT OH SHIT GOOSEBUMPS

THE CREDIT SONG IS SO BEAUTIFUL BECAUSE IT HAS FUCKING ANGELS NOW I’M-

I WASN’T EXPECTING THE POST CREDITS SCENE OH MY GOD

ROGER?! ROGER! IT’S ROGER I’M NOT OKAY-

BBC YOU CANNOT JUST DROP THAT ON US LIKE THAT FUCK-

“What is this place?” - I’M SCREAMING SO LOUD I CAN’T HOLD IT IN

For anyone unaware, the reason I’m screaming so loud over the post-credits scene is because in TAS, while Lyra is drugged and in a groggy sleep, she has these visions of Roger talking to her from the Land of the Dead, which then later leads to her and Will actually GOING to the Land of the Dead and... well, the rest is even HUGER spoilers but YEAH I’M NOT OKAY.

Honestly, I’m just so happy and emotional because I’ve been waiting over a decade for a decent adaptation of not only NL but for TSK and TAS too, and we’re 2/3 there now. Just one more book/series to go... I wish we could have it now. I really hope that filming for the final one starts ASAP because if we have to wait two years just to see the conclusion to this series, I might cry.

This series is so amazing, and this season especially has been so incredible to watch. It’s been the highlight of my week for seven weeks, and I have no idea what I’ll do with my Sundays now that it’s over. I’ve asked for the DVD for S2 for my birthday already (since it comes out 29th December and my birthday is 13th January... just saying), and words can’t describe how much I do love this series. I know it sounds hollow since I say it about so many things I’m into, but this was such a huge part of my childhood and it’s one of my favourite fantasy series of all time. It’s truly one of the most incredible pieces of literature and now it’s making for incredible television... I love it so much.

[sleepypeaky]

{getaway} final, pt.4

Reader is the Blinder’s chauffeur….naturally that entails getaway driving too

Part 4/4 ———-part 1, part 2 , part 3

also this was unintentional but the reader is gender neutral

WC: 1458

Warnings: Shooting, blood, dramaaa

A/n: set just after season 5, like the day after the last episode.

and no this isnt historically accurate obvs but i had to do it to write the fucking thing

tnis is so fun to write so try and stop me. this is kind of a Finn x reader?? idk?? finn is my wife?? but he also smol gay boi?? im confused.

“Where’s Finn!?!” Ada yelled as she kicked open the door to Tommy’s study.

Tommy was at his desk with his head down. Arthur ventured to answer,

“We haven’t seen him since the speech. Johnny Dogs said (y/n) went to look for him.”

“Arthur that was 12 hours ago! They could be hurt!”

RING

Tommy raised his head and grabbed the phone.

“What?”

He eyes widened.

He slammed the phone back down on the receiver, and scrambled to his feet.

“Mosley’s been shot.”

They stared at each other.

Ada gasped.

“Oh my god.”

They all ran out the door.

“NO NO NO NO FUCK! FUCK!” You screamed into the steering wheel.

To say that you were speeding was an understatement, you were going so fast that you weren’t sure the car could handle it.

And at the same time, to make things even more dangerous, you were flicking your gaze to Finn’s marbled complection. 

“Finn Finn come on come onnnn!” You slapped his face lightly, trying to wake him up.

He made a breathy groan, you weren’t sure if it was voluntary, but at least he was alive.

You cursed yourself,

“FUCK (y/n)!! WHAT THE FUCK WERE YOU THINKING!” You yanked the wheel to the right and were thrown along with it as the car screeched into the direction you gave it.

You were almost at the hospital. It wasn’t smart considering what had just happened, but by the amount of blood you figured it was either this or him dying, and you were not taking that chance.

And this was far enough away that maybe it would just be passed off as a casualty of one of the many daily gang shootings.

You tore into the hospital driveway and slammed on the brakes, the tires were so shot from the drive that you skidded about 3 feet.

Throwing open the door and screaming for help, you sprinted around the car and flung open the passenger side door, grabbing finn’s face in you hands and trying to call him out of the depths of his mind.

“Finn finn wake up please please.” You cried.

His head lolled in your hands, but his eyelids fluttered, you whimpered with relief.

Two men with a stretcher came up behind you.

You let them to him and watched as they ran him inside.

Your legs, as heavy as led, followed suit.

_______________

Ada sat frozen in the passenger seat of the car. A million thoughts going through her head.

She had her eyes pressed shut, hoping to anyone that would listen that her suspicions weren’t true.

Tommy’s hands were gripping the steering wheel so hard they resembled a skeleton’s. His face was in its usual stone mask, but his eyes were wind and active, no doubt thinking the same thoughts as Ava.

Arthur was silent in the backseat.

They pulled up to the scene and halted the car. Police were everywhere. The rain obscured the scene and oddly made it seem less intense than it was.

Two black tarps lay out on the ground.

Tommy sped over to them and in one swift motion, looked under each. The officers on the scene had recognized him and were awaiting his arrival, so they let this trespassing happen.

Though he let none of this show on his face, Tommy stood up and was relieved, both in seeing Mosley with half a skull, and seeing that the other body wasn’t Finn.

Maybe he wasn’t involved after all.

Nevertheless, before he went to speak to the press and police, he nodded to Ada: the signal to check the hospitals just in case.

_________

“I’m sorry you can’t come in here.”

A nurse grabbed your arm.

You looked at her in a daze,

“but..but...”

She looked apologetic and led you to a chair.

You looked down at yourself: your left shirt sleeve was drenched up to the elbow in blood from holding onto him during the car ride. As well as many other spaces on your clothes. And no doubt the car seat was completely ruined.

But all that was moot. 

Because you gave into Finn he was fucking bleeding out in the other room. Why didn’t you just fucking say no? No Finn, we are not going to assassinate a parliament member. No Finn, i won’t drive you. Maybe you thought that you being there would somehow protect him? Doesn’t matter.

You leaned your head back against the wall and closed your eyes.

You sat like that for who-knows-how long when you heard your name called.

“(y/n)!?”

You stumbled to you feet, looking around for the nurse who called your name. Instead, you locked eyes with Ada.

A sob escaped your mouth as she ran towards you.

“Jesus fuck (y/n)! What happened?!” She held you.

You lowered you voice, 

“I don’t know why i didn’t stop him. I could have but didn’t.”

She inhaled and nodded softly,

“It was you then.” She whispered.

You nodded,

“So fucking stupid–”

“At least you were fuckin’ there! If you weren’t there he would be under that black tarp with the faschist.” She harsh-whispered.

I made you feel a tad better, but still.

_____

Polly walked to the ringing phone with a usual speed.

“Hello?”

“Pol, it’s Ada.”

She tilted her head,

“What happened.”

Ada sighed over the phone,

“Finn is in the hospital, i’ll explain when you get here.”

“Jesus– not again. I’ll be right there.”

She shook her head and went to the door.

_______

“HE DID WHAT?!”

“Shhhh! Pol!”

Polly looked around to see if she was the only sane person in the room. Surely it wasn’t out of line to react like this.

She looked over at where you were sitting, still covered in blood and leaning on your hand.

“This family needs to calm the fuck down.”

“Not likely, pol.”

_____

The appearance of feet in your sightline brought you back to reality.

You looked up.

“He’s resting now, he’ll be ok.”

You stood up, shaky.

You gestured to Polly and Ada.

“Can we see him?”

The nurse nodded and led you to his room.

_____

6 hours later

The first thing that moved were his fingers, they looked as if he were playing an invisible piano on the white sheets.

Finn opened his eyes, taking in his surroundings. White walls, his feet, you passed out in a chair.

He smirked,

“Oi.” He croaked.

He watched your eyelids snap open confusingly, then they made contact with his.

“Tired?” he jested.

You glared,

“You’re a bastard Finn Shelby. A right bastard.”

You stood up and looked down over his bed, you flicked his nose.

“Ow wha’ the fuck!?”

“That,” you slipped, “Was for draggin me into this mess and then making me save your ass.”

“yeah thats fair.”

You sat down again, but pushed the chair closer. You took one of his hands.

“I don’t want to be covered in your blood again.”

He grunted, 

“Can’t guarantee anything.”

You smiled at his humor, but you felt sad inside.

“I can’t lose any more of you.”

He understood what you meant. John and you had been close, you were like an extra sibling. 

Finn turned his hand so that your’s fell in place. He squeezed.

“I don’t plan on going anywhere.”

You smiled again and lay you head down on the bed beside his shoulder.

It was here that Finn felt good, where he could embrace the quiet sensuality of plain love. Not forced, or made to behave differently, he could be himself.

He leaned his head atop yours.

________

1 Day later

“and in conclusion, you are never, to ever, do anything like that ever again. Not, that there will be an occasion to do so.” 

Tommy finished his drastically long scolding of Finn.

“And (y/n), i want to be mad, but essentially the same goes to you as well. But you were doing your job, and i’m glad Finn wasn’t alone. At least there was one working brain in the plan.”

You blinked,

“I still have a job?”

Tommy chuckled,

“What, you thought this would change that? I did tell you there would be excitement didn’t i?”

“Yeah, my body feels real excited.” Finn groaned from the bed, rubbing the bandages that were wrapped around his midsection.

“Yeah but thats what you get.” You said.

He frowned.

_____

_____

_____

_____

1930

The car rumbled beneath you, and with the windows down, your hair cooled in the breeze.

You looked into your mirrors, he was gaining on you.

“Fool.” You muttered.

Your foot lowered further on the gas.

The finish line was in sight,

5

4

3

2

1

Whoosh. 

Again, not a surprising victory. 

You eased off the gas and began the process of stopping the car.

The screech of brakes continued until you exited the car.

You threw up your hands,

“Really?! I thought i taught you better than that Shelby!”

Finn flipped you off and hopped out of his car.

“Well i’m not insane, like someone know.”

you punched his arm.

“Bastard.”

“Lunatic.”

You looked up at him and grinned.

He did the same.

He leaned down and kissed you, you returning it naturally.

You smiled into the kiss, before reaching up and grabbing his hat.

You broke off and frisbeed his hat into the grass.

“Race you!” You squealed as you ran to your car.

Finn stood in confusion at how quick that progressed.

You got back in the car, and started the engine.

_____________

The End

[almaasi]

reaction post typed while watching SPN 14x12 “Prophet and Loss”

me: (◕︿◕✿)

i’m too soft™ for this

03:26pm

i am NOT READY in any way, shape or form

but i have a standard-quality video file and a 720p one is downloading slowly

i saw the promo video thing, dean’s phone battery died and i swear my heart died with it

i’m with cas on the “no suicide please” train

on the one hand, this is a deadly duo episode and i don’t trust them. BUT, they have been less awful recently. so. i’m like. expecting some gay. but that gay is ultimately gonna feel like queerbaiting, right?? LET’S HOPE NOT

fingers crossed for real gay, just in case i jinx it by doubting it

-

03:29

HERE GOES

-

03:31

the box underwater

THIS BETTER BE A DREAM

-

03:32

THE TERROR ON DEAN’S FACE IS MAKING MY HEART POUND I DON’T LIKE THIS ONE LITTLE BIT

-

03:33

the blood on the walls from his fingers

jeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeez

;~;

-

03:34

so far enjoying the directing here

dean’s got a red light saying nope, not changing his mind

sam’s behind him every step of the way

now sam’s trying to build a bridge between them (art on the wall)

-

03:38

just............ sitting here............. recoiling constantly from the screen while this dude does whatever he’s doing to his girl

deeply uncomfortable

-

03:41

so dean hasn’t even told cas and jack

oh man

-

03:42

OH MAN SAM ALREADY TOLD CAS

OH MAN

-

03:42

the fact dean shoulders open the bathroom door without touching it and dries his hands on his jeans is a) so beautiful, and b) so relatable

-

03:45

the guy with the knife again

i winced away from the screen so hard i pulled a muscle in my neck

goddamn i forget how wearing earbud headphones means i can’t just close my ears or move away from the distressing noise

-

03:39

sam: “if we could not have conversations that sound like deathbed apologies, i would really appreciate..”

i fricking cannot with my emotions right now

also john winchester is an asshole

-

03:56

THE SMILE

;A;

“it’s so good to hear from you!!!!”

;A; ;A; ;A;

-

03:58

dean: “so thank you, and, um........................ it’s good to hear your voice”

;~;

-

04:01

why do people say “you don’t have to do this” when tied up and in danger

i find that a strange thing to say? idk

-

04:50

more red lights

a lot of red lights in this

-

04:07

another one

-

04:14pm

switching to 720p because the download’s finally done

also do women actually wear those kinds of frilly night gowns??? or is that just what people imagine “lady life partner who died violently in the night to further the manpain” to wear

-

04:17

sarah: “you wanted him... you still do.... you didn’t come here to find peace, you came here to the place where you became one with him”

sounds gay and evil

-

04:19

sarah: “you can’t.... because you are him”

i mean that makes sense, if an angel is in a host for a long time and does the same acts over and over and feels certain emotions, the host’s brain pathways would form that way, to continue doing and feeling those things

but also i guess nick said yes in the first place, and continued to allow lucifer to use him, because he was that way inclined to begin with

......you know, by the same logic, jimmy probably had feelings for dean tbh

-

04:22

i kept expecting sarah to explode in a justified ghostly rage and set the walls on fire

but here we are..........

not with a bang but with a whimper

-

04:23

kjasdufshfsdhfhFDSKJGJDSJGSJDKGJKDJGJDJGJKGJKGDFJKKJG

this screenshot of cas is a screenshot of me reacting to this screenshot

(also the noise dean’s brain is making)

-

04:25

“doctor”

this screenshot doesn’t show the subtlety of all his movements  BUT HE’S FUCKING trying not to look THRILLED LOOK AT THAT ALMOST-SMILE OMG.

just a hair’s breadth from flustering and looking down the way he did with dr. sexy maybe??? tbh he also looks sad, he would be a lot happier if he weren’t about to lock himself in a box for eternity

the lil gulp as well ?

definitely lowkey flustered, i’m calling it

-

04:29

yup, cut to sam and the real doctor WHILE DEAN AND CAS HAVE A SILENT CONVERSATION OFF SCREEN yes/yes?

-

04:32

“oh, no. no, please don’t compare this with your suicidal plan. just stop.”

he SO MAD

i love cas more than words can say

-

04:34

cas: “so then.......... this is goodbye?

THE LOOK IN THEIR EYES

MY HEART IS BREAKING OH NO

-

04:35

And then SAM INTERRUPTS

ARE YOU KIDIDNG ME

ARE YOU FSDUFVJSDGVJ ING KIDDING ME

well at least that means there’s still something to be said between them, still eternally unsaid

-

04:37

cas: “dean, if there’s a spark, a hope, then i have to try”

aaaaaaand there’s the parallel again, if cas can save donatello then he can save dean

-

04:38

YELLOW LIGHT GREEN ROOM

WE’RE GETTING SOMEWHERE

and of course cas was the one who, by appearing, changed everything

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04:43

this is so stinking cute i love seeing them together doing ANYTHING AT ALL i love them both so much

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04:44

also they talk v close and it feels v intimate

i can feel their body heat from here

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THEY GOT CLOSER

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04:45

I HAVE MISSED SEEING THEM TOGETHER AND NOT ANGRY OR ACTIVELY DYING

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CAS’ LIL SMILE

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04:47

dean: “cas’ll catch you up”

BUT IS DEAN GONNA LEAVE FOREVER AND LEAVE CAS OH NO

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04:50

sam: “donatello never quit fighting, so we could help him, because he never gave up”

OH MAN THAT GOT ME RIGHT IN THE DEPRESSION FEELS

I LOVE THAT THEY GAVE JARED THOSE LINES

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04:51

sam: “i believe in us” *punch*

okay but i laughed and i probably shouldn’t laugh

but i did laugh

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04:52

dean: “okay sam. let’s go home”

ok time to cry

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04:52

dean: “but i do believe in us”

(cas walks up)

“i believe in all of us”

P E R F  E C T

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04:54

the end screen is white from the impala lights and i’m crying this was beautiful and perfect and HOW THE FUCK DID THE DEADLY DUO PULL THIS OFF

thAT PARALLEL BETWEEN DONATELLO AND DEAN THOUGH

THAT WAS LIKE...... ACTUAL WRITING

this was great??????/ and i’m emotional??????/ more emotional that i have been for ...um, pretty much every episode for like... 2 or 3 seasons, maybe

this was a 10/10 easily

jeeeez the suicide thing and sam talking dean out of it

look

y’all know how much i love dean and cas, and seeing them in the same place at the same time

but sam’s moment at the end was the best part of this whole thing

.........but. also.

i feel like dean and cas had a scene cut. as always. there was something missing there that i feel we were promised and didn’t get. please god let us get an actual conversation between them??? about their feelings for each other????????? it kind of sickens me that we haven’t had that yet. and it’s clearly almost happening, again and again and again and it’s definitely a romance trope, interrupted before they confess their feelings

a high point: dean and sam saved the asian kid from being killed by fire, that was both good and cool and i was very relieved

i’m a bit frustrated that nick is still ... happening

but at the same time, i find nick like 350% more interesting and enjoyable to watch than lucifer

there was a lot going on in this episode, as there always is in the buckleming episodes, but i watched in stops and starts because of cats and food and the wind slamming my door and my sister texting me, so if there were pacing issues i didn’t notice. it seemed pretty smooth to me idk

but i did really enjoy this, besides the gruesome murders and latino murdery guy (who was the best friend of the older twin brother (dean parallel), technically making the murdery guy a cas parallel?) killing people in horrible ways and then killing himself :/

also dean saying the guy was a psycho and then punching him out felt a liiittle bit like “people with mental health issues are evil and dangerous” and that felt uncomfortable EVEN THOUGH the guy WAS a bad murdery sort, and the whole episode was clearly also about helping people with depression or suicidal designs for themselves.

(now i type all this out, i’m realising the underlying messages of this episode were kind of messy. just a bit.)

edit: OR maybe that was dean’s self-hatred talking

(how and why did the next prophet in line have an enochian tattoo, if the pick is random? was it just coincidence? or did he get that tattoo after donatello started whispering to him?)

sarah...... she was clearly angry, and ghosts that’ve been around a long time tend to get verrrry angry, as i recall? she could’ve done some angry ghost stuff, that would’ve been more satisfying maybe (but on the other hand, the quietness of nick’s exit was also impactful)

i enjoyed the transition of red lights and backdrops throughout the episode to yellow and white, and then the green in the room at the end

anyway. yes. really did expect more on the dean-and-cas front, but i also expected to be let down, so i don’t really know where i stand on that. i just want more of them interacting in general ;~;

next week: MORE EMOTIONS!!!! YAY