#idk man. icon 4 you

[jjcocker]

[flovoid]

are you guys normal or do yall celebrate yer fav oc birthday yearly- cuz. I do.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY FLOYD!!!

[mazojo]

I wanna dislike Rob so much and then he goes and says he likes beabadoobee and eye-

[afterglowsainz]

we used to have more | oscar piastri

part 2 part 3 part 4

pairing: oscar piastri x reader

summary: while working as community manager in formula 1 you have to follow a rule of no fraternization with the drivers, which keeps you and oscar from being together

fc: different girls from pinterest

warnings: some characters have names (because there’s only so many y/f/n that i can use), some mentions of oscar’s girlfriend as her ex

a/n: so i have this one shot called guilty as sin? (that you should totally go read) and i’ve been thinking about expanding on it a little because i keep getting ideas around the same concept so welcome to an au version of my own fic in smau format, enjoy!

—

liked by oscarpiastri, lissiemackintosh and others

yourusername another season, another year of trying to make f1 fun for the girlies🎀

view all comments

lissiemackintosh do you just casually serve face like this on a random thursday?

yourusername occupational hazards 😝

username my girl is back !!!

username she’s so classy i love her

username i need the girlies that find her clothes to find everything in this dump asap!

username my icon

username y/n please stay in f1 forever thank you❤️

username oh to be a woman in f1

username FINALLY

liked by f1wags and others

f1gossip mclaren’s oscar piastri was seen this weekend next to y/n y/l/n (the community manager of f1 social media) on different occasions. the people who sent us the videos said that oscar was the one that looked for her and approached her every time

tagged oscarpiastri and yourusername

view all comments

username yeah no

username pls lord let this be fake news

username he. approached. her. every. time.

username idk they look kinda cute together

username hoping and praying this was just for content or something

username nooo y/n is one of the f1 female icons, dating a driver would be such a setback for her 😩

username pls if she wants to date a driver then it’s her business, doesn’t take away everything she’s done for women in motorsports

username i love y/n and oscar separately, together …. uhmmm

username omg my faves!!! i hope they date they’d be so cute together 🥰

liked by exgirlfriend, logansargeant and others

oscarpiastri back to my roots in baku 🏎

view all comments

username good luck this year 🧿🧿🧿

username manifesting a championship as we speak 🕯

username ugh look at him i just KNOW a future F1 champion when i see it

username omg the ex girlfriend liked 🫣

username are we about to see episode 37283 of them getting back together after breaking up? 😅

username he looks so cute in that go-kart🥺

username let’s go oscar 🍾🍾🍾

landonorris 👊🏽👊🏽👊🏽

oscarpiastri 😉

username nonchalant king!

lissiemackintosh’s instagram stories

[caption 1: milesbaldwin, declanmurray] [caption 2: yourusername my 💗]

liked by miguelsossa, exgirlfriend and others

yourusername always hustling as you can see 🧘🏽‍♀️

tagged milesbaldwin

view all comments

username so beautiful 🤩

username the outfitttt >>>

username my fashion icon fr

milesbaldwin working hard or hardly working? 🧐

yourusername you’re one to talk

milesbaldwin i’m being attacked here pls defend my honor declanmurray miguelsossa

lissiemackintosh y/n is right miles you took two naps in one hour while we were making content

milesbaldwin !!! declanmurray miguelsossa

declanmurray girls be nice to miles

milesbaldwin 😁

declanmurray it’s past his bedtime

miguelsossa 🤣🫵🏽 milesbaldwin

username i love their friendship😩

username wtf oscar’s ex liked her post and unliked it 😭

liked by f1wags and others

f1gossip mclaren’s oscar piastri was seen this weekend with his ex girlfriend at the paddock together, emerging rumors of possibly getting back together after six months of breaking up

tagged oscarpiastri and exgirlfriend

view all comments

username not again

username does this man doesn’t know there’s other women alive?

username guys leave him alone he’s competing for the trophy of who can get back with their ex the most times

username but … but … y/n ….

username i thought they were together too 😩

username i honestly prefer him with y/n than back with his ex for the millionth time

username guys they’re holding hands… it’s over

username my guy really lost the game of getting over your ex

[simmer-until-tender]

Paris Hilton Repo-man Default Replacement

By popular demand, I am releasing this default. But be warned, the installation process requires SimPE!

You can download SimPE here if you don't have it.

Instructions

Download the files below and put them in your downloads. Use clean installer to install the Paris Hilton sim.

Go into your neighborhood and create Paris Hilton in CAS via the downloaded sim

Close the game

Open SimPE and click Ctrl + Shift + N

Choose your neighborhood, click Open, wait for it to load, then go to Tools > Neighborhood > Sim Surgery

Make sure the Service Sims box at the top of the window is checked and scroll down to find a sim named "Repo Man"

Click on the Repo Man sim and then click Use within the Patient Sim box on the right

Then, scroll up to find your Paris Hilton sim. Click on Paris Hilton and click Use within the Archetype Sim box on the right

Click Surgery

You will have to do steps 6-9 for each repo-man in your neighborhood if you don't have antiredundancy.

You will have to do steps 2-9 for each neighborhood you want a Paris Hilton repo-man in.

DOWNLOAD

FAQ and credits below the cut

FAQ

Is this safe? > idk, probably

What happens if I just download the files and don't do steps 2-9? > you'll have the car and gun defaults but Paris won't be the repo-man

Did you know that Paris Hilton never actually wore a shirt that said "Stop Being Poor"? > yep

Simpe is confusing me > see this tutorial with pictures that shows how to use sim surgery, should help!

Credits

Purplepower for the sims 4 deco chihuahua I used to make the gun

Stefan for the Paris Hilton sim I used as a base

Paris Hilton for being iconic

[dannyricsmirrorball]

miscommunications • aa23 ੈ✩‧₊˚

ੈ✩‧₊˚ pairings || alex albon x model!reader

ੈ✩‧₊˚ genre || social media au

ੈ✩‧₊˚ summary || supermodel y/n y/l/n suddenly steps into the buzzing world of the formula 1 paddock, as she gets closer with the drivers, fans are quick to speculate and ship her with a certain driver: who is certainly not quick to deny and even fuels these rumours… confusing fans even more and aggravating the secret new couple!

alt. when the paddock rumours begin to stir but everyone is just a bit off

ੈ✩‧₊˚ warning || uhhh nothing really

ੈ✩‧₊˚ a/n || i know you guys are probably sick of me saying it… but im back! but like for real, at least for some time. i’ll try and pump as many fics out as i can b4 i most likely go ghost mode again hahha ☺️

✩‧₊˚ ੈ✩‧₊˚ ੈ✩‧₊˚ ੈ✩‧₊˚ ੈ✩‧₊˚ ੈ✩‧₊˚ ੈ✩‧₊˚ ੈ✩‧₊˚ ੈ✩‧₊˚ ੈ✩‧₊˚

liked by devonleecarlson, iamrebeccad, and 324,029 others

yourusername around the world 🗺️✈️

username17 i wish i had her life

username9 ate.

bellahadid sexy bb 😘💘💕🌺

⤷ yourusername ily babybellsss

username1 y/n an f1 fan?!

⤷ username72 yessss she’s BEEN a fan, she’s a massive tifosi

alexandrasaintmleux trop belle 😍😍

⤷ username23 worlds colliding fr

jastookes my girlllll

jacquemus 🥰

username7 first pic eatsssss

lirislaw on top of the world 🥰✨🧚‍♀️

devonleecarlson can’t believe u didn’t go out w us bc u wanted to watch the race smh 🤦‍♀️

⤷ yourusername a girl has priorities 🤷‍♀️

⤷ username12 she’s one of us fr 😭

username98 it girl 💚

liked by alexandrasaintmleux, scuderiaferrari, and 627,019 others

yourusername NYC-MIA just in time for fp1 🤍

username17 SHE’S AT THE GP?!

username5 she’s a ferrari fan i wonnnn

username3 yeah she’s at the gp but why is she not in the paddock?!

⤷ username72 she probably wasn’t invited and just wanted to go as a fan?

⤷ username61 yeah but she’s a supermodel… and i’m pretty sure she’s friends w charles leclerc’s girlfriend

alexandrasaintmleux YOU’RE IN MIAMI?! 😠😠

⤷ yourusername uh oh

⤷ alexandrasaintmleux why didn’t you tell me!!! u+me ferrari garage tmrw.

⤷ yourusername i don’t wanna impose haha im fine in the grandstands

scuderiaferrari Please join us in the garage tomorrow y/n ❤️

⤷ alexandrasaintmleux see @yourusername 🙃 not imposing

⤷ yourusername and this isn’t your doing…?

⤷ alexandrasaintmleux actually no surprisingly,, turns out ferrari want the number 1 model in the world to join their garage… funny how that works huh who’d’ve thought 😐❤️

landonorris noooo take of that hat and come to mclaren!

⤷ yourusername sorry tifosi 4 life ❤️

⤷ landonorris papaya is better 🧡

⤷ username81 little lando norris shooting his shot

logansargeant how bout some williams blue for the home boy 💙

⤷ alex_albon god you are both such losers @ landonorris

⤷ yourusername hm i do love me some blue x

⤷ logansargeant i think you meant to reply to my comment but thank you y/n 😊

⤷ yourusername uh yeah hahahahah sorry mb

⤷ landonorris i detest that albono ☝️

liked by mclaren, landonorris, and 350,828 others

yourusername lights out on film ❤️

tagged landonorris, alex_albon, charles_leclerc, alexandrasaintmleux, logansargeant, oscarpiastri

username1 on friday she was in the grandstands and now she’s best friends w half the grid ICON

landonorris you must be a good luck charm 🧡

⤷ username51 mans tryna shoot his shot

alexandrasaintmleux please come to every single race now 🥹

⤷ yourusername any excuse to see u!!!

username4 love y/n x f1!!!

scuderiaferrari pleasure having you 🥰

⤷ yourusername ❤️

username28 wow y/n feeding us w the dumppp

mclaren we’d love to have you in the papaya garage next time 😉🧡

⤷ username45 wonder who’s responsible for this 🤣

⤷ username7 i ship it

williamsracing better at our job than us!

⤷ yourusername could never beat williams admin photos!

⤷ logansargeant idk i much prefer this photographer 😊

⤷ alex_albon it’s painful to watch,, also couldn’t beat aa23 film photos!

⤷ yourusername ouch but you’re right hahah 💙

⤷ aa23 they come close ✌️

liked by francisca.cgomes, oscarpiastri, and 323,920 others

yourusername bits and pieces

tagged albon_pets, landonorris, jastookes

username16 eee lando feature 🧡

username14 so happy she’s been going to races, i love seeing her w alexandra in the paddock

⤷ username7 best wags 💕

username63 🤐

username11 are those alex’s cats?!

⤷ username92 love their friendship,, they’ve probably become closer since her and lando have been talking 😊

albon_pets come see us again soon y/n 🐹

⤷ yourusername i will xx 💋

⤷ username55 she has her own albon pets emoji!!!!

jastookes 💞💞

alex_albon why do my cats like you more than me?!

⤷ yourusername i have developed a codependent relationship with otto 🫂

⤷ georgerussell63 stay in line 😒

username11 the fourth photo soft launch?!

⤷ username09 don’t know why she’s trying to soft launch when we all know it’s lando 😭

⤷ username6 let her have it haha

⤷ username23 idk that guy doesn’t rlly look like lando he looks taller

⤷ username09 well it’s probably the angle and even if it isn’t maybe that’s just her friend 😐

liked by yourusername, alex_albon, and 567,093 others

georgerussell63 weekend away before we head into the last double header before summer break 🛥️

tagged alex_albon, carmenmmundt

username62 galex strikes again

carmenmmundt 🥰❤️

usernams72 albono the ultimate third wheel

⤷ yourusername @alex_albon 🤣🫵

⤷ username72 uhhhhh hello y/n?!!?

alex_albon ✌️

username71 first pict kinda looks like y/n’s recent 🙃

⤷ username16 AHHHH landoy/n confirmed then bc if she was with them surely lando was there too!!!

⤷ landonorris yes!

⤷ yourusername gtfo mate

⤷ username11 confused again…

username23 carmen, her boyfriend, and her boyfriends boyfriend!

liked by charles_leclerc, mclaren, and 760,800 others

yourusername double-header dump

tagged alexandrasaintmleux, alex_albon, landonorris, adam_norris_pure_electric, francisca.cgomes, charles_leclerc, carlossainz55

username51 need alex and y/n’s hair care routines!

username17 norris family pic…. hard launch is imminent

username4 THE PAPAYA FLOWERS AHHHH i love them smmm

landonorris alex is an ipad kid

⤷ yourusername he’s my ipad kid 🩵

⤷ yourusername it’s a problem

⤷ alex_albon 🙈

iamrebeccad i don’t think u even look at me like that @ carlossainz55

⤷ carlossainz55 i could post a picture of you and alexandra…

⤷ alexandrasaintmleux 😳

adam_norris_pure_electric nice meeting you y/n 😊🧡

liked by creator

⤷ username17 she met the parents!

williamsracing is that a williams cap we spy…? 🕵️

⤷ georgerussell63 an aa23 cap if im correct

⤷ yourusername “an aa23 cap if im correct 🤓☝️”

⤷ landonorris nah

francisca.cgomes 🩷

liked by alexandrasaintmleux, heidiberger_, and 340,003 others

yourusername the glitz and glam

username11 y/n with daniel??

⤷ usernams91 i think this is the annual bbq thing at christian horner’s farm but im not sure why shes there

username4 who’s shoes?!? 🧡😉

⤷ username81 definitely not lando’s lol he wouldn’t be at a red bull affiliated event

⤷ username6 pretty sure alex was there soooo maybe lando could be

⤷ username23 alex still has ties w redbull thai land so

heidi_berger boots make the fit 💘

danielricciardo that good ol’ english weather 😄

username73 😍😍

gerihalliwellhorner beautiful girl

liked by danielricciardo, yourusername, and 569,039 others

alex_albon bri’ish dump innit 🇬🇧🫖

tagged danielricciardo

username71 awww y/n standing w alex meeting his family i love their friendship

⤷ username23 ahhh she probably went to the bbq with alex,, my fave bffs

⤷ username4 if i was lando id feel kinda weird about that

⤷ username17 yeah taking your mate’s gf as your plus one to an event is weird

⤷ username55 i can’t why are people acting like lando and y/n have ever confirmed they’re dating 😭😭

username72 love it albono ✌️

williamsracing home race done and dusted ✅💙🇬🇧

danielricciardo albonoooo

username23 maybe those were alex’s shoes in y/n’s dump…

⤷ username12 yeah right in his dreams

albon_pets we spy y/n 🐹!

⤷ yourusername the albon family loves me more than alex confirmed

⤷ alex_albon what’s new

liked by yourusername, max.homa, and 679,668 others

alex_albon never ask a man his handy cap 🏌️

username23 we love a man committed to his hobbies (even if he’s horrible at them)

pierregasly 😂😂

yourusername cute

⤷ username37 🤨

username61 two golf bags…?

⤷ username71 y’all acting like he’s a loser and has no friends

⤷ yourusername no need to act 🥰

⤷ username42 gagged em

⤷ alex_albon get outta my comments weirdo

williamsracing racing is his side hobby guys

liked by georgerussell63, lirislaw, and 1,093,772 others

yourusername weekend away ⛳️

username4 wait a minute…

username72 um that’s not-

username91 what in the plot twist

alexandrasaintmleux i’ve see enough. put her on the lpga

⤷ yourusername thankyou!

bellahadid sports star 🌟

username74 weekend away with… alex?

username62 soft launch is soft launching

username18 omf nvm guyssss check lando’s recent

liked by maxfewtrell, carlossainz55, and 897,928 others

landonorris golf getaway 😄

username72 awww couples retreatttt

username16 ahhahaha alex was just third wheeling lmfao

yourusername you golf?

⤷ landonorris do u even swing bro

⤷ username4 i love their couples banter

alex_albon huh funny

username61 that tank top is doing wonders

⤷ username3 gf effect goes crazy

maxfewtrell pandas on the green is crazy

liked by iamrebeccad, alex_albon, and 780,000 others

yourusername summer never looked so good

landonorris you’re right 😍

⤷ oscarpiastri 🤢

alexandrasaintmleux trop belleeeee

wolfiecindy ma girrllllll

francisca.cgomes jealous 😍

username18 boddddd

kaiagerber mermaid princess 🧜‍♀️👸💞

username62 she’s so gorgeous

username37 not a coincident she’s on holiday during f1 summer break

⤷ username6 it’s also just like yk… summer

liked by alex_albon, landonorris, and 2,009,838 others

yourusername happier than ever

alexandrasaintmleux wonder whyyyy

⤷ username16 what do you know?!?

iamrebeccad lover girl 💕💕

⤷ username4 i just need them to hard launch already 😭

logansargeant nice photographer u got there

⤷ yourusername the besttt

⤷ username27 does this count as a ls2xln4 interaction? 🤨

⤷ username1 who says he’s talking abt ln

⤷ username27 bro

username818 ugh so gorgggg

pietra.pilao lindaaa

⤷ username71 🤨🤨

⤷ username62 lando’s best friend’s girlfriend hmmmmmm

liked by yourusername, georgerussell63, and 1,009,737 others

alex_albon found my new profession

username12 if i speak…

landonorris lotta bags for 1️⃣

⤷ yourusername muppet

⤷ username16 they’re sooo cute 🥰

⤷ alex_albon aren’t they just 😍

username16 everyone sleeping on alex 😫😩

⤷ username81 more for me! 🙂‍↕️

georgerussell63 big guns albono 💪

williamsracing alex albon jpg when?

username18 oooh does alex have a new gf?

charles_leclerc cool guy 😎

liked by georgerussell63, mclaren, and 1,922,837 others

landonorris photography is my passion 🌊

username16 awww he’s the one taking all of y/n’s ig pics

username72 he has a very pretty muse!

alex_albon having fun?

⤷ landonorris heaps 😘

username4 gahhhh can they just confirm it already

username1 soft launch is driving me crazy

maxfewtrell idiot😐

mclaren we hope driving is still up there!!!

liked by bellahadid, carmenmmundt, and 970,822 others

yourusername siri play pyramids by frank ocean 🌅

alex_albon FLIP THAT SHOE OVER

⤷ yourusername mb grandpa

devonleecarlson my girllll

username31 around the world fr

alexandrasaintmleux ah i hope ur having the best time gorg

⤷ yourusername miss you my girl 🥹

alexconsani MAMAAAA 🙂‍↕️

blonded 🎧

username7 aesthetic queen

lirisaw 😘🥰🙈💋💞

username4 can’t wait to sees lando’s matching post

liked by williamsracing, logansargeant, and 560,929 others

alex_albon 🇪🇬&🇪🇸

username71 second pic 🙃

username82 wait guys maybe…

username11 omf are y/n and alex on holiday together?!

yourusername you’re loving that camera aren’t ya

⤷ alex_albon so are you…

⤷ username23 wait… what 😮

williamsracing getting that summer break tan 💙

username72 um so maybe we were wrong? but this can’t be right 😨

username3 they could just be on holiday w their friends as well lol i doubt it’s anything else

username4 waiting for lando to drop that he was also there

liked by mclaren, oscarpiastri, and 1,099,473 others

landonorris working at the pyramids tonight ⏳

username22 HE WAS WITH Y/N

username9 the pyramids lyrics…

yourusername LANDO NORRIS

⤷ username40 someone’s in trouble w the mrsssss

⤷ username5 he’s making the soft launch to obvious 😭😅

username18 MY IT COUPLES PREVAILS 🧡

oscarpiastri 😀

alex_albon mateeee 😐

liked by alex_albon, lilamoss, and 2,096,821 others

yourusername my beautiful boy

📸: alex_albon

username18 OMG SO IT IS ALEX?!

username72 albono pulled her???

gracieabrams stunnnn 🥰🥰

carmenmmundt linda ❤️

username8 gawd she’s beautiful

username44 guys i think alex just took the pictures so like including the one of her and her mans

⤷ username32 this makes so much more sense

⤷ alex_albon how.

alexandrasaintmleux unreal

landonorris 🧡

⤷ username51 AH CONFIRMATION

liked by pierregasly, maxfewtrell, and 1,929,844 years others

landonorris well guess the soft launch is over now right? @yourusername 🌅

thanks @alex_albon photography 🥰

username17 omg confirmation ahhh finally

username4 finally lando can now freely post her🥰 need a jpg post

stat!

oscarpiastri really outdid urself mate 🤦‍♂️

username55 alex has been so sweet taking all these cute pics for them 💞

⤷ username19 bro probably had the worst time third wheeling

alex_albon congrats guys!!!! 🥰😘

⤷ username71 awww so sweet

⤷ yourusername what. is. happening.

georgerussell63 congrats to the cutest happiest couple 🩵

⤷ yourusername GEORGEEEEE 👹

alexandrasaintmleux treat her right 🥰

⤷ username16 awww bestie approved

⤷ yourusername alex.

⤷ alex_albon yes 😇

⤷ yourusername NOT YOU OBVIOUSLY… OR WAIT YES YOU

charles_leclerc so happy you found eachother ❤️

pierregasly congrats @.yourusername & @.landonorris!!! ❤️‍🔥

francisca.cgomes glad you guys are finally public ☺️

carmenmmundt ❤️

mclaren our favourites 🧡

⤷ williamsracing we’re jealous! 😉💙

⤷ username65 randommm?

adam_norris_pure_electric nice one son!

maxverstappen1 👏👏

carlossainz55 ¡vamos! ❤️

yourusername that’s it.

yourusername I’M DONE YOU FUCKING IDIOT

⤷ landonorris oh no

⤷ username51 wait what

liked by alexandrasaintmleux, bellahadid, and 3,929,824 others

yourusername fuck it we ball

tagged alex_albon

username17 AHHH WHAT?!?

username18 this can’t be true

⤷ username91 accept it oh my god

alexconsani ❤️‍🔥

rachelzegler okayyyy WAG 😍

rhode 💞💖

username4 idk how to say it but alex just doesn’t feel right for y/n like they’re friendship is cute but not romantically. he’s just like the best friend type not boyfriend,, y/n needs someone hotter and more up to her standards like lando

⤷ yourusername OMG SHUT UPPPPPP

⤷ username23 y/n does NOT play about her mannn

bellahadid love you guys 💞✨☄️

britishvogue 👑👑

ayoedebiri ❣️

alex_albon omg she hard launched me i must be the one 😍

⤷ yourusername ugh ur so annoying 🙄

⤷ alex_albon i love you too

alex_albon im sorry 😞

⤷ yourusername your little prank pushed me to the precipice

⤷ username3 ??

⤷ username19 i think alex made all their friends comment on lando’s post pretending it was real hahaha

⤷ username7 ahhh omg poor y/n

liked by creator

kaiagerber cutest

graciebrns 🪐💫😘

username11 why do so many people feel entitled to her relationship and now saying that there’s no way she’s w her actual bf?

⤷ username76 people need to touch grass and stop shipping her with her boyfriends colleague and FRIEND

landonorris how could you do this to me 😳😱😨

⤷ yourusername dont even SPEAK

gabbriette 🖤

charli_xcx 👸💚

lilamoss love this 💝

jordandaniels yay💜

username23 lowkey feel bad for alex bc imagine the whole internet shipping your super model gf with your coworker and friend and then not believing it could be you

⤷ alex_albon it was fine bc i knew who’s sheets she was in 🙃

⤷ yourusername BABY

⤷ williamsracing damage control

⤷ jv.f1 Alex, it’s james.

donatella_versace 💜

yasminwijnaldum Omggg

alexandrasaintmleux aw so cute my crazy girl 🤍

⤷ yourusername i can’t believe you went along with it

georgerussell63 why did you photoshop yourself onto my body?

⤷ yourusername thanks for letting me borrow your bf georgie 💙

williamsracing things we like to see 💙

username18 still finding this hard to believe

username23 gonna be the paddock it couple

username19 alex really did his big one with pulling literal super model y/n y/l/n

albon_pets we love you y/n 🐹❤️

⤷ yourusername 🥰

logansargeant 💙

username11 my gawdddd that last photo 👹😩😫

jastookes lovelies

emrata 💋💋

username5 dying at all these major celebs and models commenting like y/n y/l/n you are so loved, alex you are there 🤣

liked by williamsracing, georgerussell63, and 2,028,732 others

alex_albon my girlfriend is a supermodel ✌️

sorry for all the comments under @.landonorris post gorgeous 😅

tagged yourusername

yourusername my boyfriend drives fast cars 🏎️

⤷ landonorris fast is debatable

⤷ williamsracing @mclaren keep him in check

yourusername yeah wtv i forgive you but you’ll be paying the price for the headache you gave me

⤷ alex_albon whatever you want baby

⤷ yourusername whatever i want? 😏

⤷ landonorris aghhh get outta here 🤢

alexandrasaintmleux she may be ur gf but she’s my wife

⤷ yourusername my girl 🤞

username44 ah i love them

username72 idk still think her and norris would be cuter

⤷ username6 righttt lowkey think they are actually into eachother and will probably end up going out 🫣

⤷ landonorris okay this isn’t funny anymore lol alex and y/n are the best people i know and are very much in love

⤷ alex_albon good man 🤝

yourusername eeeeek he called me his girlfriend ☺️😚😙🥰💞

⤷ georgerussell63 you’ve been dating for months.

⤷ yourusername someone sounds jellyyyy

⤷ alex_albon dw you’ll always have space in my heart georgie boy

username12 aww they’re literally the sweetest 😍

username8 he’s so obsessed it’s adorable

⤷ username41 as he should be!

williamsracing 💙

landonorris congrats guys 🫣🥰

liked by creator and alex_albon

✩‧₊˚ ੈ✩‧₊˚ ੈ✩‧₊˚ ੈ✩‧₊˚ ੈ✩‧₊˚ ੈ✩‧₊˚ ੈ✩‧₊˚ ੈ✩‧₊˚ ੈ✩‧₊˚ ੈ✩‧₊˚

hope you guys liked this!!!! i’ll try and be a bit more active right now x

[going-to-ikea-for-the-fries]

It's a Match! || 141 x reader

[ Chapter 2 ] || [ Chapter 4 ]

Pairing: Ghost x Reader || 141 x gn!Reader Words: 1K~ cw: some sexual jokes/innuendos Summary: While overcoming recent heartbreak, you decide to join Tinder in search of a rebound. Your friends advise to just Swipe Right indiscriminately... What happens when 4 soldiers from the same squad match with you?

Chapter 3: Simon

After doing the dishes, you moved yourself over to the living room and turned on the TV. Some rerun of an older season of Law and Order was playing.

You started watching but you found your eyes drifting back to your phone… 

Against your better judgement, you clicked on the Tinder app icon again. Maybe, maybe you should swipe just a little more.

And so you did. 

Today you said ‘Fuck you, Beyoncé’ and always went to the Right, to the Right. 

Just as you were pondering another profile, the screen darkened with a ‘It’s a Match!’ notification, making you jump a bit, as usual.

You clicked the profile and your brow scrunched. 

You didn’t remember liking this one… Though you obviously did, after all, you were liking everyone.

The only picture wasn’t even anything. It was dark and grainy and the man was wearing a black disposable face mask. If that even was him. Could just be a random picture off-Google, picked by someone who wanted to be anonymous. Not quite a catfish but close enough…

“Simon.” You said softly and dragged your finger through the screen to read his bio. For a moment you couldn’t help but smirk a little. He was sarcastic, a bit strange, but charismatic in his own way.

“Bad jokes, Bourbon, Discreet…” You mused while scanning his profile. “Tall enough.” You read aloud and couldn’t help but laugh at it. That made you feel like he was short.

Against your better judgement for the second time, you decided to send him a DM instead of waiting for him to. Something told you he wouldn’t.

you: tall enough - does that mean you’re below 6ft?

Simon: No.

Simon: Means that I have inches to spare.

you: was that a dick joke?

Simon: No.

Simon: Unless you wanted it to be.

You snorted softly under your breath. Of course he was a smart ass too…

you: ambiguous, i like it.

you: so how tall are you then?

Simon: Does it matter?

you: no. just curious.

Simon: 6ft4.

you: that feels like a lie.

Simon: I avoided putting it for a reason.

you: worried people would call you a liar?

Simon: No use. Going to be called it regardless.

you: that’s fair ig.

you: what’s a traveling consultant?

Simon: Similar to a contractor. Get brought in to help businesses all over the world.

you: what kind of businesses?

Simon: That’s need-to-know.

you: you type so formally and professionally jeez.

you: will i ever get to know?

Simon: Force of habit. Don’t text a lot.

Simon: Not if I can help it.

you: somehow i can tell.

you: what are you doing here then?

Simon: Curiosity mostly.

you: trying to see if you attract any fish? 👀

Simon: Something like that. A friend is on here. Wanted to see what all the fuss is about.

you: i see.

you: got anything yet?

Simon: No. But only created this 12 minutes ago.

you: am i your first then?

Simon: Not my first in anything, love.

Your eyes widened a bit and for some reason you found yourself getting a bit flustered, your face warming up just a bit.

you: does that mean you’ve hooked up with people through a dating app before?

Simon: Something of the sorts.

you: aw, im really not going to be your first.

Simon: That’s alright. You can come see me either way.

Simon: I’m sure you’ll find some other thing to be the first at.

Your breath got caught in your throat and you started sputtering. That came out of left field! He had gone from professional and mild-mannered to… flirty so quickly! Gulping, you tried to answer him with something coherent and funny.

you: idk what if you murder me?

Simon: I promise I won’t.

you: is that meant to be enough to convince me? 🤨

Simon: I’ll leave all my guns at home.

you: the fact you have more than one is not reassuring the way you think it is.

Simon: If it makes it any better, I wouldn’t need a gun to kill you.

Even though you don’t know this man, you can imagine that he’s laughing to himself behind his phone screen, all smug, thinking he’s funny. And, the worst part, is that he is.

you: reassuring. thanks.

Simon: Glad to be of service.

you: i think what makes it worse is that uve not got a pic of ur face.

Simon: Wouldn’t hook up with a bloke with his face covered?

you: no? are u trying to get me axe murdered? bc thats how u get axe murdered simon

Simon: LOL.

Simon: No.

you: u sure? a masked face with a mysterious job and a suspicious amount of guns… sounds like the upgraded version of ghostface… except online rather than over the phone.

Simon: I’ll take that as a compliment.

Simon: You’re funny. 

Simon: I like that.

you: thanks. 

Simon: Wondering if you’re that funny in real life or if you’d get all shy on me.

you: probably a mix of both.

Simon: How about we confirm that then? 

Simon: Meet up with me for drinks. No pressure on time or place. You can even postpone if it comes down to it. My job is unpredictable enough so I might have to postpone too.

Your eyes widened. The first attempt at flirting from him, of inviting you for a shag, had been clearly sarcastic… But this one is genuine.

you: ill get back to u on that, is that okay?

Simon: No sweat.

Simon: And if you’re just being polite and not actually going to text me again then: This was fun. Enjoyed myself. Take care.

You bit your lip to suppress a smile when you saw his polite goodbye. He was… sweet, weirdly enough.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

taglist: @daisychainsinknots , @bunnysdaydreams , @iite-cool , @lahniu , @pagesfalling , @tapioca-milktea1978 , @live-love-be-unique , @thelaisydazy , @littleghosthoney , @bossva , @emotion-no-hot-yes-hotel-trivago , @chamomiletealeaf , @ghosts-hoe

[ren-is-real]

Inanimate Insanity dash simulator (pre ep 16) (i will do more of this if this goes well probably)

🪁 inanimateinsanityfan Follow

does anyone ever get so tired they start seeing spiders lol

💼 su1tcas3 Follow

me when i lay down and hallucinate the horrors lmfao

🪁 inanimateinsanityfan Follow

what

💼 su1tcas3 Follow

Oh so this is not a safe place suddenly

2,369 notes

🪁 inanimateinsanityfan Follow

as an unbiased outsider im cheering for them both ^^ im so excited for the finale!!!!!!!!!!!

#idk what i'll do when this ends tbh #like damn. #we'll cross that bridge when we get to it!!

19 notes

💡 brightestlight Follow

any couple can be gay if they are bisexual and their genders are weird enough

🪁 inanimateinsanityfan Follow

why did you post this directly after talking to me and test tube

🪁 inanimateinsanityfan Follow

lightbulb why did y

11 notes

🎤 mic-row-phoen Follow

when you want to ask someone about something but the trek is IMPOSSIBLE and you will DIE (hes downstairs setting up a party im just scared)

🍊 orange-got-juiced Follow

i am not giving you the aux to play green day at the party

🎤 mic-row-phoen Follow

:(

🍊 orange-got-juiced Follow

ok. two songs

19 notes

🎀 rain-bowz Follow

when a fake girl tryna act like me but im the only one there is

⚙️ rowbotted Follow

REAL!!!!!

🎀 rain-bowz Follow

who are you.

📄pageperrr Follow

hey didnt you die. or something

23 notes

🌮absolutleynot-taco Follow

hey anyone know where pickle is haha. anyone know his room number or amything lol like it would justs be fun to know,,, hagaha,,,, yeagh

0 notes

🏆awinners-trophy Follow

imagine using a run down website that hasnt been relevant in YEARS. you all need to get off and go touch some grass or something jfc

🔪sharpest-tool-inthe-shed Follow

you're literally using it?

🏆awinners-trophy Follow

kill yourself

#you used to be cool man

19 notes

🎈coldairballoon Follow

i drew some vent art about old stuff.. im better now!! im just letting off some steam haha

🏆awinners-trophy Follow

this is so cringe

🎈coldairballoon Follow

you're cringe.

🍊 orange-got-juiced Follow

trophy just ran to the bathroom sobbing

27 notes

🌽 official-meeple-ceo Follow

greetings tumbler! i an steve cobs, C.E.O of the meeple company. i am looking to get in contact with a mephone! specifically mephone 4. (model 4s) any help is greatly appreciated!

🖌️ brushedpaint Follow

go back to twitter vro 💀

817 notes

⚾ thegrandslammer Follow

trying a healthier outlook on life!! i'll tell yall how it goes!!

⚾ thegrandslammer Follow

failed

⚾ thegrandslammer Follow

failed

⚾ thegrandslammer Follow

failed

8,270 notes

🪁 inanimateinsanityfan Follow

i miss egg :( i wonder where the other one the aliens mentioned went. i hope it found a parent that loves it as much as i loved egg. i mean i wasnt the best parent but uh you get what i mean

🌽 official-meeple-ceo Follow

😜

🪁 inanimateinsanityfan Follow

???????

🪁 inanimateinsanityfan Follow

??????????what??????????

#why is steve cobs on tumblr get off

15 notes

🕯 innerflamed Follow

i need a boyfriend except he's not a boyfriend and is just some weird british guy i drag around with me everywhere

1,393 notes

🍀fourleafluck Follow

diversity win!! corrupt capitalist CEO of multimillion dollar company steve cobs is bisexual!

🌽 official-meeple-ceo Follow

who informed you of this.

🍀fourleafluck Follow

I WAS??? JOKING??????

#GUYS??? #STEVE COBS GAY ICON??? #HOLY SHIT #IM SCREAMING ITS HIS OFFICIAL ACCOUNT ITS NOT A GIMMIC #meeple

23,105 notes

💡 brightestlight Follow

as a member of the lgbt we do not accept steve cobs

💡 brightestlight Follow

even when he changes the meeple logo to a rainbow during pride month we dont accept him

21 notes

☯ ringinginthenewyear Follow

☯ ringinginthenewyear Follow

just to clarify yang posted this not me -yin

57 notes

🥒 pickledposting Follow

steve cobs being bi and accidentally admitting to it on tumblr was not on my 2024 bingo card ???????

🌽 official-meeple-ceo Follow

you'll be first.

🥒 pickledposting Follow

what

29 notes

[kiyeuo]

　　　　 the perfect pair : event

the perfect pair (noun): a super sweet, inseparable duo who are the best of friends. They’re always in sync, sharing endless laughs, kindness, and little moments that make life extra fun. they understand each other without saying a word and always have each other’s backs. together, they bring out the best in each other, making everything feel brighter and happier. It’s the kind of bond so strong that they just can’t imagine being apart—because they’re simply better together.

in this event you will be given 2 idols (from the same group) that have an unbreakable friendship n given the opportunity to showcase their longlasting bond :3

⠀ ⠀ㅤ⠀ ⠀ㅤ⠀ ⠀ㅤ⠀ ㅤ⠀ ⠀ㅤ⠀ ꯭ ꯭

⠀ ⠀ㅤ⠀ ⠀ㅤ⠀ ⠀ㅤ⠀ ⠀ INFO (◞ ◟𑂴 )

rules :

𐙚 ꯭ must be 85% made by you (locs/symbols & divs not made by u are fine!)

𐙚 ꯭ must include the 2 idols i give u (gifs, pics, etc.) + its ok if theyre in seperate pics!!

𐙚 ꯭. no stealing from others/heavy inspo !

𐙚 ꯭ . post must include the tag " the perfect pair : event 𐙚 " or else it wont get counted

𐙚 ꯭ . tagging me in the post/comments is optional but highly reccomended cs my stupid ass might forget abt it!!!

𐙚 ꯭ . max entries r 2 , n if u want u can dm me to groups to make 2 entries idk man

how to join :

꯭ 𐙚 comment "joining!" n ur fav idol duo / fav person u love being a duo w !!

꯭ 𐙚 reblog post (tagging ppl is optional but yk 🥺🥹)

꯭ 𐙚 dm me ur fav kpop group n ill give u 2 idols from them for u to make a mb

( u can make it in any style, format, etc, it just needs to include the 2 idols! :3)

deadline is jan 8th ,, so u shld have enough time 2 finish however if there r any inconveniences dm for extension!

hehe have fun n if u have any Qs feel free to dm n lmk!!

chat ignore tags.. i just needed ppl to tag lmfaoo!!! i love ygys though n id be super happy if u joined hehe :3 but its ok if u dont !!

tagies : @chaeryeos @hourlyhoon @chaeneuu @cwrcent @wonjuii

@tarosuna @taroism @kissunoo @florichae

@artoruu @gyarulise @jinsveoul @r-kizn

@atsubie @seoyangi @nikist-4-n @studiogyu ++ guys idk

EDIT :: PRIZES !!

1st - 125 reblogs , 2 mbs, 2 div, 1 header/2locs , 2 gifs

2nd - 75 reblogs, 1 mb , 1 div and 1 locs & icon pfp. & 1 gif

3rd, 50 reblogs, 1 mb, 1 div, 1 loc & 1 gif

honorable mentions - 25 reblogs & 1 icon/pfp

all participants will receive 10 reblogs (its not a lot lmfao 😭😭)

[ahllohehn]

HERMITS AND THE OLYMPIANS MASTERPOST (07/31/2024)

------------------

Hermits and The Olympians/Emperors of Olympus is a Hermitcraft/Empires SMP based Percy Jackson AU based off my art and headcanons!

(Please do not use the tags for other PJO AUs as I use them to specifically label what's based off mine.)

------------------

Seperated by art/doodles, headcanons/discussion, fanfics:

# 1 MUMBO PORTRAIT # 2 GRIAN, PEARL, SCAR & MUMBO ART # 3 HaTO FAN CREATION GUIDELINES # 4 GEM, CLEO, DOC PORTRAITS # 5 ETHO & BDUBS THANK YOU CARD # 6 STRESSMONSTER THANK YOU CARD # 7 CAMP EMPIRES FIRST APPEARANCE; BAD BOYS DOODLE # 8 OUTDATED CAMPERS GODLY PARENT SUMMARY # 9 CHIBI MUMBO THANK YOU CARD # 10 GRIAN CLOSE UP # 10.5 WATCHERS CAMEO??? # 11 BDUBS & SCAR; DEMETER CABIN'S HONORARY CAMPER # 12 RENDOG PORTRAIT # 13 MUMSCARIAN / RE: AU SHIPS # 14 IS THERE A CANON PLOT? Answer: I stick with what is canon to me, but I do not force others to follow so. As I am too lazy to do an actual plot. # 15 CHIBI STRESS & MUMBO # 16 BDUBS..? # 17 ETHO PORTRAIT / 1ST AU FICLET # 18 I JUST THINK THEATER KID ARES KID REN IS FUNNY # 19 JOEL AND LIZZIE; SOULMATES IN EVERY UNIVERSE # 20 ORACLE GEM...? # 21 oh snappers! (LOW QUALITY ETHO DOODLE) # 22 AT THIS POINT, DIONYSUS, ARES, AND APOLLO SHOULD FIGHT TO THE DEATH TO SEE WHO GETS CUSTODY OF REN # 23 SKIZZ & IMPULSE PORTRAITS / HEADCANONS # 24 ZEDAPH PORTRAIT

# 25 Camp Oracle’s Journal; Hermits and The Olympians # 26 GRIAN - THE DEATHLY ACTIVITIES MANAGER # 27 ISKALL & TANGO PORTRAITS # 28 KERALIS & XISUMA'S PERSONALLY MADE CAMP PIN # 29 I REALLY LIKE MAKING FUN OF REN /AFFE # 30 I ALSO REALLY LIKE INCLUDING MARTYN INTO THE MIX /AFFE

# 31 TREEBARK ARE MY BOYFAILURES # 32 RENDERED CAMP LOGOS (PNGS IN DISCORD SERVER) # 33 SHELBY & SCOTT PORTRAITS # 34 ETHUBS MY BELOVEDS :) # 35 INTRODUCING: GIGGS # 36 RE: CAMP EMPIRES AND CAMP HERMITCRAFT DOUBLES # 37 LET OLD MEN BOND LIKE OLD MEN (ETHO & TANGO) # 38 OFFICIAL HaTO DISCORD SERVER ANNOUNCEMENT # 39 MYTHICALSAUSAGE PORTRAIT # 40 XISUMA PORTRAIT # 41 HaTO FIRST COMIC SHITPOST # 42 FALSE, KERALIS, & BEEF PORTRAITS # 43 WELS & HYPNO PORTRAITS # 44 MUMSCARIAN FIRST MEETING DOODLE # 45 WHY IS WELS AN ATHENA KID? # 46 HOW IS GEM THE ORACLE # 47 HaTO SECOND COMIC SHITPOST (PRIDE MONTH) # 48 DESERT DUO ANIMATIC; INSPIRED BY BEAN'S TRAITOR SCAR FIC

# 49 MARTYN PORTRAIT / HEADCANONS # 50 IF SCAR WERE TO BE APHRODITE'S.... # 51 REN VS JARS # 52 LIZZIE PORTRAIT # 53 HaTO SCAR & GEM EMOTES # 54 HaTO CHIBIS BOUQUET DOODLE # 55 GRIAN AND HIS SON # 56 KATHERINE ELIZABETH PORTRAIT # 57 MUMSCARIAN MATCHING ICONS FOR PRIDE # 58 HOW ARE YEAR ROUNDERS GETTING EDUCATION? # 59 SHINY DUO MATCHING ICONS # 60 AROACE PEARL (PRIDE MONTH) # 61 BISEXUAL CLEO (PRIDE MONTH) # 62 CAMP CUDDLE SESSIONS # 63 TREEBARK COMEBACK # 64 When Does a Man Become a Monster?; Hermits and The Olympians

# 65 BOAT BOYS MATCHING ICONS # 66 WHAT DOIN'? CAMP HERMITCRAFT EDITION # 67 "I'M A CHILD OF DIVORCE" GESTURES TO ETHUBS # 68 MORE ETHUBS HEADCANONS CUS IM GAY AND SO ARE THEY # 69 DO NOT ANGER THE NON-ZOMBIE WOMAN, MR. ETHO # 70 NATURE WIVES # 71 I COMPLAIN ABOUT THE HEPHAESTUS CABIN'S ABILITIES # 72 TREEBARK MATCHING ICONS # 73 OLI PORTRAIT & HEADCANONS # 74 IT'S NOT ME IF THERE'S NO ETHUBS # 75 WELCOME TO HERMITCRAFT: GRIAN TEXT ADVENTURE # 76 GEM'S ORACLE CAVE TOUR

#77 THE BOYS (+ GEM) GO SHOPPING FOR SUITS #78 PEARL CHARACTER CARD #79 Camper Files; Hermits and The Olympians #80 STRESS PORTRAIT #81 CUBFAN PORTRAIT #82 FWHIP PORTRAIT

#83 PIXLRIFFS PORTRAIT #84 RANCHERS #85 WHY DO I HAVE SO MUCH TREEBARK IN MY INBOX? #86 IDK HOW SAD I'M SUPPOSED TO MAKE SCOTT #87 LONG TIME, NO NATURE WIVES? #88 AREN'T WE ALL A LITTLE SILLY FOR GRIAN SOMETIMES? #89 I HOPE YOU ALL KNOW I JUST BE SAYING ANYTHING ATP

# SECOND MASTERPOST LINK

OTHER HaTO Related Links:

HaTO Roleplay Blogs Masterpost by gem-the-oracle HaTO Archive of Our Own Series HaTO Discord Server

[ladcedes]

controversial!

summary f1 heartthrob lando norris starts dating a hot, up-and-coming celebrity with a not-so-hot personality and some fans protest…

disclaimer reminder this is completely fictional!!! the “faceclaim” (very loosely) may be rachel zegler but in no way am i basing it off her personality!!! no hate to her at all i love her sm

the tweet:

comments

user-1 isn't this lando norris' new gf

user-2 no way she's featuring on a DRAKE album 💀💀

yourusername

Liked by bellahadid and 223,449 others

yourusername one thing about me and red carpets... i'll always be serving cunt ❤️‍🔥

view all 442 comments

hunterschafer yess always serving the best looks

bairdballad absolute icon!!

(liked by lando norris)

⤷ bairdballad wtf lando liked this

⤷ snowangel @.bairdballad lando is so real for that

landonorris always a stunner

⤷ yndefender so can we take this as confirmation that they're together

⤷ ynmyloves @/yndefender if this isnt confirmation idk what is 💀

ln4life her language is so vulgar why would lando be with her

⤷ futuref1w4g ikr she's such a bad influence

⤷ angelyns icb you actually said vulgar 💀 lando norris is a fully grown!! BRITISH!! man!!

⤷ milcedes @.ln4life @.futuref1w4g average instagram comments...

lewishamilton 👏👏👏

⤷ ylnstars LEWIS??? lando you better get tf up

⤷ ultraviolenced ariana what are you doing here

2007wdc we should expect lando of all drivers to be with a girl like her most tbf

⤷ 9thwdc aside from lewis

lando.jpg

tagged: yourusername

Liked by daniel3.jpg and 342.112 others

lando.jpg and that marks the end of the 2023 season ✨

view 4 comments

yourusername not a single pic of my face yet you tag me... someone tell him that's not how soft launches usually work

⤷ lando.jpg @.yourusername who says i'm trying to do a soft launch

⤷ yourusername @.lando.jpg you showed me hundreds of other 8K HD pictures of me with my face and only post faceless ones?

⤷ lando.jpg @.yourusername maybe i'm just gatekeeping your face

⤷ yourusername @.lando.jpg it's ok lan, you can stop trying to cover up your loser soft launch attempt, i'll still love you

comments have been disabled

yourusername

tagged landonorris

yourusername cheers to the haters 🥂 he still loves me xx

3 December 2023

view 316 comments

georgerussell63 @ landonorris Your gf is scary help

landonorris you tell em babe

norrislclrc queen behaviour i say

ln4life can’t believe he’d get with you

⤷ ynloml and? you think he’d ever look in your direction?

⤷ ynvfx literally get a life how are you still out here yapping about them even on insta??

ladcedes using this "comment" as an author's note! this is so scuffed im sorry i started it back in early december planning to do more for it but i got busy and atp just wanted to get it done 😭

⤷ ladcedes so for anyone confused about the drake album randomly being there… yeah…

[physalian]

7 Misused Tropes (And How to Improve Them)

Tropes in isolation aren’t inherently bad, but a lot of them are prone to poor execution. Each one of these probably could have a whole post by themselves. A few of these used to be good but have since fallen by the wayside as their original meaning has been lost.

7. Dramatic Miscommunication

You know the ones. I think it’s worse when the story is otherwise good, the writers just could not come up with a better way to get X alone or send Y off on the necessary side quest than the lowest of low hanging fruit.

Two essential ingredients for fixing this trope: Precedent and consequences

Precedent–have the character doing the missassuming already be prone to jumping to conclusions, already suspicious or insecure, or misled by a third party so this looks inevitable, instead of pulled out of your ass.

Consequences–usually these are big blow up fights that fizzle out without any impact on the plot once they fulfill their purpose, but if it’s a nasty enough fight, characters shouldn’t just forgive and forget. While they might not completely ruin relationships, it should have characters taking a step back and either second guessing where they stand, or using this blowup to fix an underlying issue in said relationship.

6. Love Triangles

Good Love Triangle for the first 3 seasons: Elena/Stefan/Damon (TVD).

Bad Love Triangle for the entire series: Bella/Edward/Jacob (Twilight).

The difference between them (besides time to flesh out both candidates) is that both brothers brought valid pros and cons to Elena’s life, both got the chance to be with her, and Elena’s whole arc wasn’t solely focused on the agonizing choice of which brother she should pick. Regardless of which camp you’re in, Stefan brought stability, that classic cliché high school romance, mostly all good vibes. He never challenged her or talked down to her or got aggressive with her. Damon did the opposite, for better or for worse, and we know which direction the show went.

On the other hand, Jacob never for one second stood a chance with Bella and the narrative wasn’t kidding anyone. They never so much as went on one date (unless you count the motorcycle ride) and it seemed like Bella was only letting him hang on for pity’s sake. Theoretically he brought pros to the table that Edward couldn’t (like, idk, being alive), but the narrative never explored what could be done with him. He just ended up being the Nice Guy friend who then decided it’d be hot to lust after an infant.

5. Agency-less Chosen Ones

These tend to be wish fulfillment characters that bring nothing to the story and have no discernible skills, yet are constantly in the middle of the action, have all the love interests fawning over them, and are Important and Critical to saving the world… because the narrative said so. They don’t make a single choice the entire plot except to move forward or stagnate, chosen by the gods or a prophecy or fate and destiny.

The problem: These characters walk with the crutch of “I’m the chosen one thus I don’t need a reason to exist in the story” and that’s just not a satisfying narrative shortcut. So? Give them agency. Even if they’re chosen by some ancient prophecy, you still have to convince the reader why the Universe wasn’t just talking out of its ass.

Good example: Emmet from Lego Movie literally says he’s useless and has no skills and cannot think outside the Lego box. He’s supposed to be as generic as painfully possible and when he does have creative ideas, they’re supposed to be asinine and stupid. And yet. He might be physically dragged around by the other characters, but he has plenty of choices, plenty of opposition to what’s happening, plenty to say about the state of his world, and his ideas do matter and his intimate knowledge of the instructions and playing by the rules is how they win.

4. Bad Boy Love Interests

These guys were supposed to be counter-culture icons, standing up to The Man for the little guy because he knows the system is broken and rigged. He’s an affront to the stereotypical nuclear lifestyle, he resents a robotic and soulless office job and wants to create art or music or in some way benefit his world and isn’t going to play nice just to get his way. He exists in contrast to the nuclear female protagonist: Conservative, demure, rule-following caged bird who falls in love with him because he shows her that life isn’t meant to be lived in The Man’s cage. He respects the authority that deserves respect, the teachers who actually give a shit, the janitors, the librarians, but probably not the principal or the police or the local politicians, because he knows they don’t respect him and respect is a two-way street. He’s probably a mama’s boy or at the very least loves his parents (if they’re alive) and while he might engage in a little property damage like graffiti, it’s for a good cause.

This dude is NOT SUPPOSED TO BE: Abusive, controlling, aggressive, or condescending to his love interest. He’s not supposed to be an overprotective stalker or plagued by insecure jealousy over any other man in his love interest’s life. He’s not rude to his friends or arrogant about his own smarts and doesn’t think he knows best about every little thing in the world. He’s not sexist or racist just to make himself feel better and he doesn’t pressure his love interest into sex because she owes him or whatever.

Ahem.

Please bring back classic bad boys. That is all.

3. Major Character Death (for shock value)

I remember the implosion of the Walking Dead fandom after they killed Carl, one of the very few characters who was supposed to make it to the end, for… various sketchy reasons and I could never figure out what was true. Some theorized that his actor was aging out of the ‘child actor’ payscale and they didn’t want to pay him as an adult and while I have no proof, it wouldn’t surprise me at all.

Carl died after getting bit in just one of those hectic moments where he got unlucky, while doing something noble and stupid. In isolation, it fits the nature of the “anyone can die” show but man did it just come across in poor taste.

Obviously “for shock value” shouldn’t be the reason you do anything in your story but there is still a way to pull it off without it causing a riot: Make sure they get killed in a non-contrived way. If you plan on killing off one of your heroes suddenly, either make it bitterly ironic, or make it a situation that this character would absolutely get themselves into. The more it “fits” the less likely audiences will see the hand of the author coming in just to break the character’s fictional contract.

2. The Power Inside You All Along

This trope is usually disappointing because it tends to melt a character’s whole arc down into something pointless—this whole adventure was apparently useless if they didn’t actually need to grow or change or challenge their conceptions of the world. They could have got up off the couch as joe shmoe and beat the villain day one.

While that’s probably not what their creator intends, ‘it was inside you all along *wink*’ tends to feel that way, as it discourages internal conflict. Usually, their creator is likely trying to convey the message that one need not change, that it’s what’s inside them already that makes them special.

I present to you once again Kung Fu Panda’s “there is no secret ingredient” i.e. “the power inside you”. The difference is. Po still has plenty of internal conflict: his own self-confidence. He begins the movie eager but inexperienced and a bit oblivious, fanboying it up around his heroes. He and Shifu both insult his weight and his lacking kung fu skills, and his arc is learning self-confidence, learning how to use his weight and the body he has to fight in a way that the villain isn’t prepared for, to where Po can shit-talk him to his face during the final fight.

Most failures of this trope don’t bother exercising their protagonist. They’re pissy and resistant for the entire story and only win when the narrative agrees they were right all along. Therefore, no change, no conflict, no resolution.

1. Strong Female Characters

So many of these read like "slapped boops on a male character". They don’t work for many reasons (usually being very preachy with their agendas), but they especially don’t work when by trying to be pro-feminist, they’re still reinforcing masculine standards. A lot of people, when Captain Marvel came out, said “you didn’t have any issues with Tony Stark being an asshole but now you do when he’s a woman” which. No.

Tony was an asshole, but being an asshole was the whole point of his character, and he got humbled right quick by getting blown up and held hostage. “Proof that Tony Stark Has a Heart” and all that.

Carol was an asshole with nothing to substantiate it, and never got a reality check. She had amnesia so we didn’t get insight into who she was before to understand this transition into dickishness and was so OP, she wasn’t ever physically or emotionally challenged like Tony was.

But the other thing is this: Slapping boobs on a male character with a slew of toxic masculine traits also says that to be a successful woman, you must behave like a man. It swings so far from the femme fatale sexy leg lamp that it comes around and eats its own tail. These characters are just mean and insecure and build themselves up by tearing down the men around them.

So. Calhoun from Wreck it Ralph is this exact trope done extremely well. She’s aggressive, arrogant, loud, rude, and cynical. For about 10% of her arc. The movie immediately throws her into a situation where her strengths are basically useless—she’s stuck in Candy Land and has to rely on someone who is the antithesis of her game and character to make it out. The movie also shows you why she’s cynical via her tragic backstory.

Not only that, she’s more than just a heap of toxic masculinity in a pixie cut. She laughs, she cries, she admits when she’s wrong, she has a soft side, a gentle side, a caring side, and remains a badass through and through.

Or, once again rolling out Tigress from Kung Fu Panda: Proud, aggressive, the snubbed chosen one, cynical, mean, and overconfident in her abilities. Tigress nearly gets her entire team killed in her arrogance. She’s allowed to be wrong, very wrong. She also has her soft moments and, like Calhoun, has a very valid reason for being jaded, and is still shown to be capable of softness and nurturing during the evacuation.

Third example to hammer home that I don’t hate badass women: Andromache. Jaded, overconfident, short-tempered, aggressive, and a little mean-spirited. Tragic explanatory backstory? Check. She is also caring and loyal to her team, allowed to get emotional, allowed to be wrong and fail and lose, and kind of the surrogate mom of the team, who can also laugh and joke around and have light-hearted moments.

Whether the character is a man or a woman, being an arrogant asshole who takes zero accountability and refuses to admit when they’re wrong and never loses, audiences aren’t going to like them.

[binothesteptrashcan]

Ok it’s ranking Fives time and I’ve definitely forgotten a couple but now they’re all dead anyway so whatever also Season 4 Spoiler Warning

1.Brisket Five- Iconic. Apparently always wrecking shit for the other Fives and seems to take pride in it. I feel like he was the one who created the commission bc he just has that aura of I Want to Cause Problems. Wish we got a full episode on him and why he’s named Brisket Five and the other shit he wrecked instead of ep 5.

2. Apocalypse Five- I mean he tried to kill Homewrecker Five what more could you want in a man. Only second because he missed.

3.News Paper Five- Great with numbers even by Five standards. Opens up questions about the news paper itself like what timeline is it from? Is it a Five produced newspaper? He is in a timeless zone why is he reading a newspaper? Is it just for the crossword/sudoku? It’s probably just for the crossword/sudoku.

4.Drunk Five- me too buddy me too. Presumably got kicked out of the deli/diner/whatever it was and I hope it was because he saw Homewrecker Five coming and was preparing to get rid of the lowest common denominator.

5.Waiter Five- I don’t trust him no real Five would ever work customer service willingly there’s something else going on but he also serves Homewrecker Five a sandwich without enough sauerkraut and sucky coffee so points for that.

6.Booth Five- Boring. Bland. Might as well be Shitty Exposition Five and his only redeeming quality is that I must assume he was trying to motivate Homewrecker Five by telling him to give up so he would do the opposite and save everyone which clearly backfired.

7.Literally Any Other Five I’ve Missed- idk like Old Man/Technically Mentally Younger Five from seasons past or Baby Five or Pre-Time Travel Five you get the picture.

8. Homewrecker Five- Last and certainly Least what the fuck dude. Why are you like that. Why did you give up on your family your entire life has been about getting back to them and keeping them safe like you didn’t even try? Also why not go get Delores????? why did you not tell Lila about the way home immediately????? What the fuck is wrong with you????? Why are you working for the CIA and how did you not notice your boss was in a fucking cult he had a tattoo????? Fully convinced Five from seasons 1-3 was actually either Brisket Five or Waiter Five and he got fucked over by some cosmic entity and is being forced to work customer service and is currently biding his time before he goes and saves his family for realsies.

Thank you for coming to my TedTalk

[lexlovergirl]

Farleigh Start…p3

Tw:smut

Farleigh Start! Who had a really lonely childhood. He’s used to being alone so it takes a while for you to get close to him.

Farleigh Start! Who once he trust you enough, he doesn’t leave you. He wants/ needs to close to you 24/7, you’re his lifeline.

Farleigh Start! Who the more his high the more he’s a sub.

Farleigh Start! With whom you share lollipops. Switching with each other once in a while to taste the other flavour.

Farleigh Start! Who will rarely say “I love you” but you know he does by his love language (previous part)

Farleigh Start! Who will leave kisses on your neck and shoulders when you’re doing your hair/makeup.

Farleigh Start! Who doesn’t buy you gift often but when he does it’s expensive. And I mean like Louis Vuitton , Valentino, Dior, Prada, Vivienne Westwood. Anything you want he’ll get it for you baby girl.

Farleigh Start! Who hates taking shower with someone else. As much as he loves you, that’s his moment of peace. He likes to take that time for himself.

Farleigh Start! Who has the longest hair routine ever. While you’re in your bed waiting for him to come join you, he’s putting idk how many products in his hair. One of the many reasons he’s doing it is you; he knows how much you like to pass your fingers through his hair so he want it to go smoothly, without any nots.

Farleigh Start! Who after you have a hard day will gladly give you a shoulder/back massage.

Farleigh Start! Who loves to give you hickey. He will try to make a heart of those bruises on your chest but will fail miserably.

Farleigh Start! Who after a fight will fuck you so good. Going slow and deep, praising you, pulling your body as close as possible to his, but almost never actually saying sorry.

Farleigh Start! Who is a total fashion icon. He changed your way of seeing fashion and your way of dressing.

Farleigh Start! Who hates showering with someone but surprisingly loves to take bath with you. For him a bath his extremely different then a shower. A bath is to relax, fuck, enjoy the warm water, so you’re gladly welcome. The shower ,I’ve said, is for him and him only.

Farleigh Start! Who loves when you’re loud during sex. He’s loud himself so he’s less embarrassed if you’re too.

Farleigh Start! Who when you tease him will punish you later for it. It’s not that he teases you that you can, yes he’s a sub but sometimes you get a little too comfortable for him.

Farleigh Start! Who is trying to convince you to fuck your tits. If you don’t want to, he’ll jerk off to the idea.

Farleigh Start! Who won’t put a label on his sexuality but wants dick once in a while ( if uf homophobic you’ve chose the wrong man, Farleigh is not 4 u)

My previous work:

Farleigh headcanon 1

Farleigh head canon 2

[as-i-watch]

have you ever ranked pirate flag designs? i think i really need to know your take on that… and also who you think designed them in the crew?

Oh this is a good one, i havent done it and havent even thought about it before!

Im not gonna rank all the flags bc im sure i'll forget some, so...

Top 10 Jolly Roger 💀

10. Hawkins Pirates

It has a bit too much going on but i like it, i think its creepy and gives off black magic vibes, true to Hawkins powers and aesthetic

9. Kid Pirates

There so much going on but its badass. It feels like a 13 y/o boy assisted in the choices but its also feel honest, like he genuinely is that. Very true to Kid's personality

8. Thriller Bark Pirates

They showed a bit more restaine than the other two, more clean. Strong aesthetic game in desing and colors, you just know they have a haunted mannor dracula shit going on

7. Whitebear Pirates

Instant classic. Neat and to the point. If you have a physical trait like that use, brand on it. I also like the angry eyes on the skull

6. Buggy Pirates

Speaking of physical traits. No messing around, clown, bosh. I also like it looks silly, it doeant strike fear but its so funny looking that i like it

5. Red Hair Pirates

Against what i've saying, i love they resisted the urge to give their jolly roger red hair (there are other red haired people, its not that unique). Its a classic timeless look. The red streaks bring it together to look like Shanks scars but also an eyepatch but also blood.

4. Heart Pirates

Law does not have a jolly roger he has a Brand™. The jolly roger has nothing to do with his physical appearence of name of the crew but it has a story, or backstory rather. Its a unique shape, it has its own color scheme, he slaps it on on everything. Its a logo, and i like it

It also if you look at it for long enough it starts to look like a surprised egg with striped piyamas on

3. Straw Hat Pirates

Talking of branding. Simple, effective, a pop of color on the hat. Silly looking and you inmediatly know who is behind this crew. A personalised classic and bc its so straight fowards just beats Law's desing to the top three

2. Cook Pirates

Its so silly i cant not give it high marks. Can you even imagine been terrorised by a crew that sails around with that? Amazing. And from the man nicknamed Red Leg Zeff bc of the blood that his kicks drew, duality of men

1. Kuja Pirates

Now that is a look. Its simple yet scary af. It really intimidates you, and its related to Boa but not in a too obvious way, a call back to Medussa and gorgons, badass and dangerous women. Impactful, effective and iconic.

And as for who made them: Hawkins(?) (dont know any other members) / Kid and Killer helped / Hogback / Whitebear but i think he consulted Rogers and they sortof copied eachother / Shanks age 14 as a joke / idk why but Lucky Roux / Law. / Luffy and Usopp helped (as we know) / Zeff (he is quirky like that) / Amazon Lily's CM

[holnnetd]

Catfisher!König Part 2

Part 1, ..., Part 3, Part 4(I swear it will come. Someday.)

Warning: Suggestive content, brief mentions of pornography, a little misogyny, low-key incel behaviour, a lot of lingerie talk, just two guys being losers, please be 18 or older if you read this, or just don't tell me you're minor, I can't stop you from going anything tbh.

This is only fiction, please remember.

Ding!

Ding!

Ding!

Your phone has been going off for this whole time. It must be extremely important when someone starts sending you messages at 11 pm on a Friday night.

You come out of the shower, hair wrapped in a towel, (unless you don't have hair, in which case idk what to do) and another one around your body.

You got lucky enough to get a dorm on campus with no roommates. Bless god for that scholarship. Dorms are expensive!

Glancing at your phone you check what might be so important, only to see that it's a follow request on your Postagram. (Idk, I'm scared I will get copy righted when I forget that this fic exists)

You open your phone, glancing at the account. The profile pictures shows no face, but a fairly cute cat picture. Whatever.

Alexandria.69 viewed your profile

Alexandria.69 wants to follow you

Alexandria.69 wants to send you a message

That's... A creative name. For sure...

You tap on the icon and glance through the profile. 8 followers from faceless account and following 37 accounts. Mostly singers and political figures.

The only pictures posted is from 2 days ago. It's a selfie from a high angle and a cropped off face in a summer outfit.

Seems to be a new account, maybe she's new to Postagram. Yeah, seems about right.

You tap 'accept' and answer the message she sent. Worst case scenario it's just a scam. What could possibly happen?

Well, that was a dry text for sure...

Whatever. You get a weird feeling about that anyway, 8 faceless accounts is a suspicious smount. You tap off of Postagram and place your phone away to fully dry yourself off.

Yet the black screen on your phone doesn't stay for a long time as you get another,

Ding!

You got a message from Alexandria.69

You turn to glance back at your phone, debating if you want to keep on chatting with this oddly uncanny account.

But you prioritise changing into something more comfortable and plop onto your bed, quickly crawling under the covers before finally deciding to check what she wr-

Ding!

You have 2 unread messages from Alexandria.69

Ah... just as you reached for your phone, too. It's really rude to interrupt the narrat-

Ding!

Layla send a message

Well, at least it's not that strange account anymore. And you open the text from Layla, a close friend, checking what she send.

"Geez! We're having a blast man, you can still come" she texted, then attached a picture of her and 4 other girls from your class, all drinking and probably at the club, guys behind them, hands going to place they'd normally get slapped for touching...

Ever heard of FOMO? Fear of missing out? It's funny how strong it gets, even if you believe to be alright alone.

"Nah, I'm already in bed" you answer, not bothering to go out clubbing tonight.

Ding!

You have 3 unread messages from Alexandria.69

Okay, what the hell does she want?

"We have some mutuals actually 😊"

"You know Layla right?"

"The red head, I mean."

Well, that's attention grabbing.

And with sone hesitation you type back "Layla, yeah", the message being seen immediately. Seems like she doesn't have much else to do but chat with friends of friends, hm?

"She said you're like good with guys?"

A message came back and it baffled you at the boldness. Maybe confused a little.

Uh... that's an interesting comment to make. Good with guys? Is that what your best friends is saying about you to others?

"Well, I guess?"

You tap, thumb hovering over the sent button before pressing it, now interested where this conversation might go.

"It's embarrassing to say"

"but I have issues with talking to boys and uhm, I"

"Uh... could you help me out?"

That's... A little pathetic, but everyone has to start somewhere?

And it's not like you have much better things to do. Your friends are out, getting laid and you are stuck in bed, chatting with a girl that knows your friend?

"I think so?"

"Oh my god, really? Thank you so much!"

That's a little sad, asking a girl you don't know about advise on guys. But girls support girls.

"Do you have a crush?"

"Oh, yes. He's handsome but I don't know how I should make him notice me"

"He says I dress weirdly."

Well, then drop him. Please, have some self respect.

"Alex, sweetie, if he doesn't like how you wear your clothes then don't change for him."

You try to give advice she will find useful, or supportive, pretty oblivious to the fact that Alexandria is actually Alexander. And not just any Alexander.

Alexander Kilgore, the very same classmate that makes snide remarks about your looks.

"Oh come on. Cooperate a little." He gruffs out, tapping on his phone again.

"I know, but I really want him to like me."

"Jeez, needy cunt. You're really doing too much." Rody scoffs, looking at Königs Phone Screen, both of them trying to lure you into a sense of comfort. Well, König wants to do that. Rody is just here to make sure the big guy doesn't fuck up. Which he already did by calling himself Alexandria.69.

Like really? His name but gender swapped and threw in a 69? Please...

"I don't know how to dress up to catch his attention! I want to wear something more revealing."

He writes, instantly getting a hit on the back from Rody. "Jesus, pushy much? No woman straight up texts other women "yeah, I want to fuck him, help me find something to wear so he wants to fuck me too", you uncultured bastard."

König huffs at him, glancing onto his screen as you start typing back.

"Well, if that's really what you want."

You're not going to argue with a stranger about what she wears. It's not like you know her. It's not like you that she's not a her.

"Try wearing something low-cut. Maybe flash your cleavage? You could wear some lingerie under loose clothes and 'accidentally' stretch a little to show it off?"

Alex stares at the message, reading through it several times with huge eyes. That's really what you are telling to a girl on how to grab her crushes attention?

Now he wonders if you're doing that too to grab your crushes attention. "Shit, I knew she's hot, but that's a little freaky." Rody laughs, getting this time a jab from König.

"Lingerie? Which one? I don't know what would look sexy enough. Do you have some recommendations?"

The two guys sit on Königs bed, staring at the phone like two teenage girls writing to a crush.

"Well... Most men like red. But you can't go wrong with white or black, really. I have some red sets."

That send König into a blushing fit. Fucking pathetic. Please, he watches weird hardcore porn but gets flustered when a woman talks about lingerie.

"Oh thank you!"

Rody texts instead, quickly clicking off of Postagram to ensure König don't milk this newly found communication method.

For now, you don't suspect that it's actually a pathetic virgin loser writing as a girl, hoping to get some more information out of you, maybe a picture he can jack off to. God, that would be fucking hot. He wishes to have even a single picture of you, and your posts are too covered!

All while you sit in your bed, confused about the conversation. That was... interesting to say the least. But whatever. Some girls are just awkward, surely theres nothing more to it.

Yeah.