#idk man!!!
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it’s so silly and fun how much i deeply love Christian Borle after all these years like obviously i don’t really know the man so ya know create some healthy distance there but watching just one new video of him takes me back and makes me so excited and happy!!!! he’s so damn funny and kind and talented and lovely!!!!!
like my love for him has never waned, even if i don’t blog about him as much as i used to and i get distracted investing in other shows or movies or something, i’ll come back and it’s like, oh hello old friend. we’re still here. you’re back and you’re wonderful.
a lot about me has changed in the last 12 years, but this hasn’t. glad i still have not “grown out of” my Christian Borle Era haha
#christian borle#btw I’m not only idealizing him bro for sure has flaws#but yeah#like why is that 50 year old man who kind of knows you your ‘comfort person’…….#idk man!!!#we’re just out here
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got a recommendation for a pain specialist at my rheumatologist appt today 👍 who looks rly great but doesn't take my insurance 👎
#apparently there's discounted self pay rates but would probably still be expensive lol#so i think im gonna waittttt at least until im done(ish) with cardiology#and then maybe call and find out what the self pay rates are#and then maybe adjust my fsa next year to account for it#IDK MAN!!!#well I've got stuff i can do in the meantime to manage it#there's two other specialists i can look into too so there are options at least#im lowkey gonna miss the rheumatologist office lol they were so nice and so helpful
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mmmm whatever maybe i do have the tism
#faking it is like. a conscious decision right.#i did nothing but be silly online and have already been assumed to be autistic so i think that’s telling of something dibajdhas#idk man!!!#who cares
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I hate drawing outfits
#IDK MAN!!!#why do clothes have 2 exist!!!! why do they have 2 be interesting!!!!#dies#elliot rambles
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I think I really like using the word "queer" for myself.
I was recently experimenting with "bisexual" as a label, but being on the ace spectrum as well I feel like there's too much implication and emphasis on the "-sexual" part of the word (idk whether this is due to society's over-sexualization of bisexuals or something else) I just couldn't justify it. I feel like just as soon as I was using that word I had cishet men being weird about it in DMs, and I absolutely could not handle it considering I am recently finding myself unattracted to 98% of them.
I keep rotating the words "sapphic" and "butch" around in my head like a microwave oven, but I don't think I identify enough with womanhood or femininity to be able to use those. Sapphic just feels gross and wrong to me and I know there's discourse as to whether butch can even be used by non-lesbians so idk. I want to feel comfortable in my identity but also not step on anyone else's toes or anything if that makes sense.
So basically I'm going with queer because tbh at this point your guess is as good as mine
#its good because I dont feel any pressure re: who i am or am not attracted to#dont make fun of me im pretty sure its gotta be an ace thing to only realize in your 30s ur attracted to women#idk man!!!#personal
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#mine#ts4#ofmd sims#mollie#i know i said i wasnt gonna continue the family line w werewolves but#these two are so much more interesting than fawn and melissa lol#and adorable!!!!#idk man!!!
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i think i might be otherkin
#bee buzzes#how do i explain it.#to me it’s not a spiritual thing so much as it is a neurodivergent thi#like it’s definitely a product of the autism#but it also feels like something very separate#i dont think i was anything particular in a past life#i dont even know if i had one#but i imagine having wings and a tail and long furry ears#and i wish i could change my shape#and i want my hands to end in claws#and i sometimes cry like a wolf#to me it’s like#an autism thing but so personal to me it almost feels like a separate thing#even though the two are intertwined#idk man!!!#either way how did it take me this long to realize💀#like!! i’m definitely human inside and out. i love being human. i love humans#but also#i got that dawg in me yknow what im sayin 👹👹👹
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had a dream I went to a hozier concert and mr. hozier stopped singing and pointed to me in the crowd and asked me to go get him some extra crispy tofu and a blueberry shake for after the show and then the crowd passed his debit card to me and when I got it I could see his real legal name was Horace Bob-omb
#then the rest of the dream was me running through traffic trying to get to mcdonalds for the shake and to the store for the tofu#but i could still hear the music from the venue wherever I was#just chattin'#yeah man idk either#i guess is should tag this as#hozier#?????
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puppet hour was brutal
#this was a part of a comic i sketched as a warmup but it was too many panels so im posting this on its own#gravity falls#the book of bill#mabel pines#stanford pines#that one page gave me hope that ford trusts mabel and treats her better than he did in the show#cuz man it always made me so mad watching the show#like iknow its the point that ford thinks he and dipper are just like... better and smarter#not that he doesnt like mabel#but like idk!!!!! idk!!!!!!!!!!#the book of bill is redeeming ford a bit 2 me
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Why did I only find out today that the “I think we need to kill this guy meme” was a fucking Steven Universe vs Hitler comic?????
I was just caught so off guard by this
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after patrolling, unwinding in a diner somewhere ...
throw the man a bone batman geez
#a very notice-me-senpai moment#lol idk i just can't stop thinking about this exchange i thought up whenever batman calls supes out for 'showing off'#GAAAHHH I LOVE THEM#superbat#batman#superman#world's finest#my art#fanart#man i just love an oblivious batman
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Just spit it out already
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Human Bill Cipher
(Based on Alex Hirsch's "canon" design)
And just to be clear, writing dissertations at me justifying why he should instead be a conventionally attractive twink will involuntarily cause me to draw him with even fewer teeth.
#And also: i know#i know the mayor of halloween town. I know guys.#twink death dilf birth#bill cipher#gravity falls#boy oh boy im anxious about posting this here please be nice to me#“the design deoesnt fit the voice” ?? idk man like. what if it did though.#you can draw him! i dont mind#no need to ask (:
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The creator of squid game spending years trying to get his point across that exploiting the poor and desperate for entertainment is bad watching netflix make a spin off of his fictional series where they in fact exploit the poor for entertainment
#me watching the single father of 2 cry because his little candy brokw and now he wont be able to feed his kids#like. idk man
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so how about that theory that Odysseus' red eyes in Six Hundred Strike mean Ares is helping him out on behalf of Athena, huh?
#epic the musical#epic the vengeance saga#epic ares#epic odysseus#idk man this popped into my head like a quick thought#and a vision#ares went to athena and said “sorry dad beat you up do you want me to help your guy out?”
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