#idk it's just annoying to me that people are just holding the drivers to different standards

[roscoehamiltons]

i've been seeing people say "not everyone can be lewis" in response to what the drivers have been saying in the press conference and media, and what i don't understand is: why not? what's stopping them from speaking about different issues? why is it that lewis is expected and able to be well spoken about various issues in the paddock yet suddenly when it comes to other drivers it's 'oh well he's not lewis so that's the best they can do 🤷🏻‍♀️'

[konaanaria13]

Alcohol is Toxic as well

Charles Leclerc x Fem!reader

Warnings: a lot of swearing cuz that's my fav thing to do.... ahm idk just like oh google translated French, Its a big one and I've been working on it for a while so I don't remember!

word count: around 8K

so its enemies to Lovers but also their toxic friends who are friends but just always fight and kind of are very nasty to each other yep yep yep!

nice.... (also rly bad grammar I think, nobody proof reads this)

♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡

It was as if we we're just meant to like each other.

Both of our Families we're high in status so it was just natural that we had to spend a lot of time in the presence of rich people.

Wearing the right clothes and The right smiles, It was rather a surprise for my Mother when she heard the absolute disliking I took in The Leclerc boys.

Arthur and Charles the most since Arthur was just always repeating what Charles was doing and oh gods Charles was so irritating.

Enzo wasn't. But since I already Disliked two I went for the three while talking.

Sooner or Later My mother made me wear the Ferrari colours and stand in the paddock and having to watch the races so everybody knew that we we're connected of sorts.

She wanted me to marry rich and in High status so she could be happy.

Me and Charles we're different, he liked car's and I like Quiet study sessions so we simply didn't get along very well, but we had to spend a lot of time together as my mother and his mother we're basically best friends even though they we're two completely different people.

But it wasn't as if we didn't talk, we talked a lot, me and Charles the most since we we're about the same age and it was easy to talk with him, to sneak out at a gathering and get drunk on a rooftop talking about our lives as if we weren't screaming the dumbest insult at each other five seconds earlier.

It was an understandment that even though we didn't like each other we we're in the same boat both holding our heads high and smiling when the camera was in our face.

But Charles family was supportive, I loved his mother almost more than mine, but i couldn't since she wasn't my real mother.

My parents always needed me to be the perfect Daughter, I was the middle child before me came the Golden Boy who went on as a doctor and below me came the baby Boy who sailed the world and did whatever he wanted with our parents money but never got scolded for it.

I stayed. not that I wanted my parents we're cruel... or rather strict, They words stung almost harder than they're open palm even though my mother hasn't dared to lay her hands on me. at every gathering I liked having the Leclerc family there, for Charles mother to pull me into a hug, for all three of the boys to kiss both of my cheeks with a smile and for Charles to notice my exhaustion.

"You look wonderful" Charles handed me another glass of champagne.

We we're on a yacht in Monaco, a weekend before the race. The Stroll Family had organised some of the upper class people to attend it and My mother couldn't miss the opportunity to show of her new earing's, she looked beautiful as always.

"Thank you" I took a sip and we watched as Arthur and Lance talked.

The boy was talented and attractive. Just maybe I could try...

"Do you like him?" I ask Charles and he raises an eyebrow.

"As a driver I mean? Lance? He seems nice-"

"Very nice. He's naïve" Charles agrees and I roll my eyes as Charles takes out a whisk of Alcohol and pours some into my empty glass of champagne.

"How's University?" Charles asked.

"Fucking boring. I've been stuck on like five paragraphs and I have to attend this stupid Party rather than go to an actual one on my Saturday evening" I complain and he laughs.

"It does surprise me that you chose law" he says and I frown

"Why's that?" I ask annoyed.

"You just never seemed the type-" Charles started and I rolled my eyes again

"Cause I'm a woman?" This time he rolls his eyes

"No! Oh my god you always have to do this!"

"Maybe if you weren't a sexist dick-"

"I was ten! And I was simply surprised that you wanted to go karting! It wasn't about you being female!" He whispered so he didn't have to scream.

"Well I beat you anyways-" The race of luck I liked to call it.

"You could never beat me now so"

"Yes but the last time we raced I did so be quiet" The pure luck i had in that race was unbelievable.

"I am a literal formula one driver and you have karted twice how could you beat me now?"

"I don't have to beat you again. I already did so it doesn't matter" Charles looked like he was gonna explode.

"Your such a cunt" Charles whispered under his breath and I chuckle.

"Says the raging asshole" I mutter and suddenly I feel a harsh slap on the back of my head.

"Ow!" Charles had already turned to slap the person back just as I did but we both turned away as it was Enzo.

"Y/n your mother told me to tell you that if she see's you roll your eyes again she will kick you out of the house and Charles Mamon said that if she see's you insulting her again she will also throw you out of the house-" Enzo had that strict look on his face but me and Charles glanced at each other

"I don't live with her anymore-"

"Me neither"

"Both of you. Be nice and fucking smile."

"Yes." I whisper and Enzo leaves.

"You wanna ditch?" It was maybe thirty seconds after Enzo told us to be nice.

"Yeah. You got you car?" We slowly made our way to the stairway only to be greeted by Arthur and Lance.

"Hey- oh Lance its nice to meet you I'm y/n I'm sure Leclerc has mentioned me?" Charles pressed his lips into a thin line.

"Yes... nothing nice I believe" I glare at Charles.

"Snitch" Charles mumbles

"We'll he's simply always embarrassed because i am a better driver." I laugh it off and Charles roll's his eyes.

"So not true do not believe that-"

"I have a video? Dm me on Instagram and I'll send it to you? Maybe we can talk more on there as well?" I flirt my way in a circle so that now the two boys were in our spots and we we're at the staircase.

"Oh- yeah sure?" Lance smiled like a puppy.

"No. Your not getting her socials. Arthur take him away." Charles put his hand on my waist and pulled me away and off the boat.

"Hey! I was getting myself a date?" I push his hand off.

"Your not dating another driver on the grid!" He objects and I push him away.

"And why not?" I walk on the pond until I reached the side walk going into the harbour.

"Because your mother won't allow it- come on I'll drive you home? Or anywhere come on?" I pushed him away.

"Leclerc fuck off, I'm calling a Taxi it's fine" I hated when he did that. Interfered in a perfectly fine build up.

"Stop being a bitch and come with me" he grabbed my wrist

"Oh I'm being the bitch?! You always fucking do this and I'm so not putting up with it"

"Y/n I will literally drag you come on"

"Don't you dare" We've been in this situation before, if he pissed me off he would always make me go with him anyway and either walk me home or drive me home or drive me to his place it was all the same.

"Are you coming?"

"No go away." I try to take my wrist away but he pulls me closer and there it is again. When he is close and for a second I forget all the insults and stupid remarks he makes, all the pranks and games he's played on me. All of the rumours he made up and all of the harsh slaps i got because of him. In a second where he is so near its almost frightening me.

"Please y/n? I'll drive you home and you can sulk and cry about how much your parents hate you there." But it only lasted a second.

"You fucking asshole" I slapped him

"Let me go or I'll scream" I've slapped Charles plenty of times and every time he looked like he wanted to straight up punch me back but he never did.

"I will literally choke you to death" I couldn't help but laugh.

"I really didn't think of you as the kinky type Leclerc" I chuckle and Charles rolls his eyes.

"Come on" He grabbed me by the waist and pulled me to his car.

It was funny how i never got interested in formula one over the years or racing of any sorts, even though I had to attend a good amount of the races.

"My mother is calling" Charles informed me about ten minutes into the drive.

"Yes Mamon" I looked in the backseat to see the duffle bag of Clothes

"Charles where are you two? Y/n moth is about to explode in anger, reporters came and you two are nowhere to be found" I chuckled while i got some boxers and one of Charles shirts out of the bag.

"Yeah Y/n got sick so we had to leave? I told Arthur to tell you" Charles raised his eyes brow at me as I put the shirt on and took the dress off beneath it.

"What its uncomfortable?" Charles looked way embarrassed as his eyes glued to the road.

"Noh Chére, Arthur ne nous a pas dit" and there was the French again.

"mère j'emmène Y/n dans mon appartement elle va bien" I heard his Mother frown

"S'il te plaît?"

"Fine, I'll tell her mother something"

"Mercy"

"Mercy Pascale!" I shout into the phone and Charles chuckles as he puts the phone away.

"What did you tell her?" I ask and Charles shrugs.

"Your coming to my apartment because your sick we can get drunk and watch a movie?"

"Do you maybe have....?" Weed brownies, It was Pierre's recipe and the first time I had them I wanted to merry Pierre.

"I can't I have a race next weekend" The stupid FIA and their stupid drug test...

"Yes but do you have?" Maybe it was mean but it wasn't my fault that Charles became a driver

"I do and yes you can have some" I smiled at him tossing the rest of my clothes in the back.

"Thanks gods its night or people will think we fucked" Charles says after it got dark.

"Hah?" I look up from my phone putting my legs up.

"Your dressed in my old shirt and my boxers what would you think?"

"That their comfortable" I remark and he smiles.

"Can you put your seatbelt on?" He asks after another beat of comfortable silence

"Are you worried about me?" I can't help but smile.

"No we're about to pass The police." I roll my eyes putting the seatbelt on.

As we get to his apartment my mother calls me.

"Are you absolute mental?!" Charles leaves me alone in the car.

"You cannot just leave! I will talk to you Father!"

"Mom Just- I was sick and I'm at Charles I'm sorry I should've told you? " I tried to avoid arguing with her.

"I'm still here so I won't talk about this now but your going to the race next weekend and I won't tell you father about your stupidity"

"Yes yes. Mom Leclerc is waiting I've got to go ill talk tomorrow" Charles was waiting he opened the door for me and helped me out giving me his coat so I wasn't completely naked in the street.

"Thanks." I mutter And he lets me hold onto his arm noticing my unstable state.

"How much did you drink?" He asks and I shrug.

"I had like three shots before I got on the yacht" I mutter.

"Why didn't you tell me I would've drove slower I don't want you throwing up on me."

"I'm not gonna throw up on two shots of vodka Leclerc" He opens the door for me and I enter his apartment.

"Never say never" Charles mutters with a laugh.

"I'm just annoyed at my mother" I explain and jump up on the counter while Charles gets me a glass of water as well as a shot.

"You're being nice today?" I take the shot

"Had a rough week" He says and I smile.

"What movie do you wanna watch?"

"Something scary so we can laugh" I ask and Charles takes another shot to survive the night.

"Alright you chose I'll get you your brownies" I jump down and find myself into the couch where I put Anabella on.

The next morning was torture. Not only did this bitch let me sleep on the couch and not bother to put me into the guest bedroom he also left with no breakfast in the fridge.

I cleaned the kitchen from last night's drinking session and took a shower until a friend picked me up with a fresh change of clothes.

The Monaco Grand Prix was the most grandiose GP and Everybody wanted to be the one holding the trophy at the end of the dat.

I arrived at the Paddock at Saturday walking in all black and wearing my sunglasses so people got the hint that I wasn't in the mood to talk.

"Yo! Y/n" Pierre kissed my cheek and I wrap my hands around his neck.

"Hey" I take my Sunglasses off.

"You don't look good.

"I was up late studying. I had an essay to write till today and I forgot about it."

"Come I'll walk you" The alpine boy hocked his arm with mine and walked with me to the Ferrari paddock.

"Leclerc hasn't returned any of my calls since last weekend do you know if he's alright?" I ask and Pierre shrugs.

"Has been running around a lot doesn't really have time to breath" Pierre says and I nod.

"Do you think he will win?" I ask and Pierre sighs

"I mean Ferrari started pretty bad but I think if he gets a good pole position then yes. I believe, also your here" He gives me a gentle smile and i raise an eyebrow

"I'm here?"

"Yeah don't you read headlines? Your like his lucky charm" I stop walking and stare at him puzzled.

"Like he performs better if he knows your watching, He would never admit it but it show's, every time you attend the race he relaxes of sorts because he knows your gonna support him no matter what." Unconditional Love. Pascale told me that one's...

"Its easy for you two to love each other, you don't expect anything"

"So he never has to worry about performing bad which leads to him performing good" Pierre talked as if he didn't just made me realize things.

"Oh." Oh

"I'm sorry, I shouldn't have told you that he will kill me" Pierre laughs it off and I look up to see us standing in front of the Ferrari paddock.

"Don't worry, our little secret as always." He smile's and I bite my lip as I wat for Pierre to leave so I can walk into the Paddock but he stay's which must only mean one thing.

I turn around Charles smiling down at me.

"Hey" he kissed my cheeks and I greet him.

"Hey, how are you? Why haven't you picked up your phone?" I scold him and he rolls his eyes.

"I was busy calm down-"

"I am calm Charles but you can't just ignore me-"

"Hey Pierre" He ignores me greeting Pierre.

"Oh fuck you" I walk away from Charles into the Paddock And putting my sunglasses back on.

Charles got P1. It was rather surprising. The car wasn't that fast but Charles knew how to push its limits.

"Rather surprising" I set in the Paddock as Charles assistant comments on the subject with a down right look.

"Why? Charles is an excellent driver no one should expect less of him" I snap rather angrily and she nods embarrassed.

"I just meant-" Charles enters the Paddock getting out of the car.

"You did good" he walked over to me taking the bottle of water beside me.

"Best I could" He didn't look at me.

"Are you alright?" I reach out but he almost flinches.

"Yes I'm just stressed that's all love, don't worry" He makes sure to look me in the eyes now so that I know he isn't lying.

"Alright, yeah I'll see you tonight? After media?" I ask and he nods.

"Come by? we can have a drink?" He proposes and I nod.

"I'll meet you there" He let's me touch him, A brief second where his fingers brush mine.

In the evening I waited in the lounge for Charles, then i waited in my room, until I went to his knocking on his door.

"Yes I'm coming!" He sounded stressed and when he opened the door he stared at me.

"Shit- fuck I'm so sorry I completely forgot" He was in his boxer's and his shirt was unbuttoned, it wasn't like I haven't seen him naked, we ended up skinny dipping with Pierre and his friends a few year's back but it was always a pleasure.

But gods, he looked like a mess, his face was slightly red and his eyes we're as if he had cried and his lip's trembled when he talked.

"Jesus Leclerc- you look horrible what's gotten into you?" His hair was wet from a shower and i stepped inside reaching to touch his face.

"I just don't think-" he swallowed running his hand through his hair.

"I don't think I can lose this race, I don't think I can" He was having a panic attack. I pushed the door close and took my shoes off.

"Come on" the first time I saw Charles have a Panic attack was after he lost a karting event, I didn't know why it was so important to him since I rarely listened to them talk about the importance of races but I noticed his jittering fingers so I followed him into the cabin an. I tried to get him to breath, Enzo came thankfully and got him to calm down so I left them. Maybe it sounded cruel but I wasn't going to do him good back then since we we're so immature and I might even say I would have used it against him.

"Hey come on you wanna take a bath?"

He likes cold bath's

I tried to remember what I did the last time when I was alone with him like this but it was all gone.

"No I just need to breath" He looked up to the ceiling his eyes we're read, his skin felt hot and his breathing was uneven always taking one faster than he ended the last one.

" come on you need to breath" I lead him to the balcony where we we're met with the chill air and he set down, his hand's came up to his chest and his fingers trembled as he swallowed a sob after the other.

"Oh fuck- I'm so fucking done Jesus y/n I can't do this anymore" He cried out and I rubber my hands over his knees.

"Come on try to breath you fine" I waited until he leaned into my touch to take his hands where i made sure to give him a rhythm, I took his hands up when i wanted him to breath in and pushed them back down when He should exhale.

"Your doing great" I nodded at him and he nodded back.

After fifteen minutes he was calm and quiet.

I got up and got him water with some gin.

"You need a hug?" I ask and he shakes his head.

"Ew y/n" he was fine. I breathed through.

"I should've called Enzo" I mutter as he drinks the water.

"No. Your good." I don't think he was able to complete his sentences that night.

"I'm sorry. I'm really stressed." Short words. He was looking into the night sky trying to find the stars but the lights around us we're to bright.

"Do you want me to stay?" I ask and he find my eyes.

"Yes. Please." He adds and I smile standing up.

"Come on" he took my hand and I lead him to bed where he fell in comfortably.

I looked for his clothes from where i took one of his shirts and changed into them before laying down beside him.

"I am still angry at you" I whisper and he raises an eyebrow

"You couldn't have bothered to put me in the guest bedroom could you?" I ask and I see his faint smile.

"Room's are for people. Not for dogs." I gasp and slap his arm and I can't help but smile when he laughs.

"Gosh I wish I could help you" I whisper and I notice how harsh my words we're.

He didn't seem to mind.

"You are helping me" He says and I smile.

"I hate you with a burning passion" I tell him and he nods.

"Good. At least one thing that doesn't change" He says and I laugh.

"Yeah" He fell asleep first, It was late when I set up and brought my knees to my chest sucking in a shaky breath with a following sob.

It was Hurting me, of course he was an asshole, he did terrible things and made me cry uncountable times.

But I would never wish to have to sit there again, his shaky hands in mine, it was so fucking scary. I felt as if his heart was going to stop any second, His skin felt so cold, His eyes we're losing their pretty colour into a red teary Breath taking pain.

"Fuck" I let my nails dig into my skin.

"Be quiet" He turned around and I scoff returning to reality.

"Fuck off"

"Shut it" He frowned taking the blanket

"Wanker" I fell asleep.

The first time I was interested in a formula one race was in 2020 Baku race where Daniel and Max where on edge, I found myself in a bit of a crush for the Dutch Driver so I paid attention.

The second time was the morning after I had to hold his shaky hands in mine trying to be as steady as possible for him.

The entire race my skin was so itchy, so I scratched it off staining my fingernails.

My mother hated it when i did that but I didn't even notice till the end of the race.

Charles stayed in P1 for 80% of the race, at the start he lost it to Max but quickly got it back when max ran into a wall because his rear end hit the wall.

The second time he lost it was because of a pit stop fail and I swear I was ready to punch the crew member myself.

"Just push a bit" I muttered and he did, he caught up pretty fast as he thankfully changed to soft tires.

When he won My heart skipped a beat, I heard his scream over the radio, It was so full of beauty I needed to breath.

I took the headphones off and waited.

"Y/n Charles asked if you could put the headphones on?" One thing I hated more than Charles was Phone calls (which i got used to) or even worse radio calls (which really wasn't necessary for survival)

"Tell him he can come find me, I'm not talking to him over a radio." I wasn't that desperate was I?

"Yes ma'am" His engineer told the message to Charles and then Looked at me blankly.

"I'm not telling her that" The engineer said into the radio and I smile.

"Did he call me a raging cunt?" I ask and The engineer looks at me in shock

"Yes." He laughs.

"Tell him he can drive into a wall for all I care" I leave the paddock soon after not wanting to be on Charles last person list.

He called me when I got back to my apartment.

"Where are you?" He was clearly in a rush.

"At my apartment?" I asked as if I didn't ditch him.

"Come to the party?" He asked and I laughed.

"I'm not really in the mood-"

"Y/n i just won the most important race in my career put your favourite dress on and get the fuck to the Party or I'm gonna drag you here" His voice was filled with laughter, even though he wanted to sound convincing or demanding he was so over joyed that it was simply impossible for him to be angry.

"Do you want me to pick you up?"

"No, no, you go have fun I'll join you in an hour" He hummed and I Heard the voices around him pulling him away.

"Promise you'll come?"

"Yes. I'll be there don't worry"

"I'll come to your apartment if you don't"

"I'm already on the way" I lie before hanging up and phone down.

I chose a red dress for Charles victory and made sure to wear the Necklace his Mother gave to me on his account on my birthday since he was 'occupied'.

I called an Taxi and took a shot so I wasn't completely sober when I got there.

It was rather cold, the party was on a massive yacht and It was almost overflowing.

I made my way up the steps carefully looking for Anybody I knew.

People seemed to know me and some came over to say hi but my brain was completely shut down.

"Y/n!" It was Pierre, Lovely Pierre who had a girl in his lap and called me over handing me his drink.

"Why did you leave early? Charles was worried! Where is he? Charles!"

"Pierre the night just started how much did you drink? " I laugh and Pierre took his drink back rolling his eyes at me.

"Are you really the right person to mother me? Miss let's see who can chug the most beer? When she was 17?" I laugh.

"Exactly I was 17 how old are you right now? 12?" Pierre scoffed and I looked around spotting Charles.

He wore a black suit and a white shirt underneath the first three buttons undone and he was talking to Max.

He looked pretty, his cheeks we're flushed red and he had a glass of cranberry vodka in his hands which was even more attractive now that i think about it.

"Pierre calm down on the drinking I'm going over to Charles yeah?" He gave me a thumbs up and I smile at the girl apologetic before making my way over to the bar.

"Hey Max" I ignore Charles leaning in front of him.

"Hey Y/n" He noticed my intention thankfully and decided on Ignoring Charles as well.

Charles put his hands on my waist and pulled me closer to him and Max laughed at me as I rolled my eyes at him leaning back comfortably.

"Clingy much?" I ask and he gives me the glass of vodka.

"Its an open bar for you" He tell me and I smile.

"Why be as clingy as you want then" I take the glass.

"Somebody know the real value" Max mutters and I raise an eyebrow in question.

"Free alcohol" He explains and I laugh.

"Congratulations on p2 btw" Max scoff's.

"Thank you but no thank you"

"What? P2 is amazing! It just proves that next time you will so better" I slap his arm as he roll's his eyes.

"You know for all the things you two say behind each other's backs you do make a good couple" Max leaves us and I scoff's pushing Charles away and turning to him.

"Red for me?" He asks ignoring Max's comment.

"No for Carlos I wouldn't wear shit for you." I drink my drink.

"Really? I'm pretty sure I chose that necklace for your 20th?" Charles picked the small red heart shaped gemstone.

"It was from your mother."

"No! I chose it and I wanted to give it to you myself but I had a race you cunt" he dropped it, my skin missing his touch.

"Liar! Your mother didn't tell me you had a race and we all knew you didn't chose it you we're off somewhere while I had to spend five hours in a thight dress smiling for pictures. " I scoffed at him and he stared at me.

"It was a Sunday. I had a race in Spa Belgium. My mother didn't tell you because she didn't want to worry your Mother who always made a big fuss about it and would've want you to join me. But it was your birthday and you hate to attend the races" He explained and I swallowed.

"I got you that necklace a month even before your birthday. I got it In France, me and Pierre we're driving around all afternoon because I knew you wanted That exact one. It was the one you asked your Father to buy you that summer" Charles just talked and explained while i stared at him, how could such an insufferable annoying little shit be such a sweetheart all of the sudden rather has always been and how was I only noticing it now? Charles kept defending himself for another 5 minutes calling me a raging cunt five times as well.

"Thank you" I interrupt him at some point.

"It's one of my favourite necklaces. Thank you" It became my favourite in that moment.

"and I don't hate attending your races"

After another two drinks Lando and Carlos came over and started to talk to Charles about the race.

"Lando you wanna dance?" I asked the brit and he Looked at Charles for an answer.

Charles wasn't listening so he just shrugged and offered me his hand.

"Why not" He let me walk behind him until we got on the dance floor where he put his hands on my waist and guided me to the music.

"Did you and Charles fight?" He asked over the music leaning down so i would hear him.

"I mean we always fight" I shrug letting my hands fall around his neck.

"Yes but like why did you want to dance with me and not with him?" He asked and i raise an eyebrow.

"Maybe Because i don't like Charles?" I laugh and Lando scoffs.

"To be honest The first time i saw you two i thought you we're dating" I laugh at his stetment.

"But then you trippee him and walked over him so I was like nah... But it did take Carlos to tell me that you weren't dating so i would belive it.

"Oh?" I laugh at him and He smiled.

"Well We're really not- so yeah I'm single like a Pringel" I joke and he laugh's again.

The first time I met Lando Charles had told him that I was a huge McLaren hater which obviously wasn't true but Lando believed him and would straight up ignore me for a month.

Carlos confronted him for me and then he laughed at the both of us for a week before clearing it all up.

"Come on let's get another drink before i start sobering up again" Lando took my hand and got us back to the bar where I ordered two beer's on Charles account.

"I can pay its fine" Lando tried but i Scoffed.

"Charles is paying don't worry" I hand him the bottle and he smiles.

The night went away quick and soon the people started to leave, Lando had pulled me into his lap as we set in a couch cirlce where the other drivers had started to gather around aswell.

"To be honest I though I was gonna spin out in the fifth lap but i somehow stayed in control" Lance had started talking to Lando and I watched as the two drivers exchanged infos about they're car's.

"Y/n whats your favorite car?"

"Oh I'm not really intrested in car's" I sip on my drink and they laugh.

"Its a Ferrari" Charles set down beside me and I waved a Pierre who took the seat beside Charles.

"Hm?" I Raise my eyebrow.

"Your favorite car is a Ferrari." He says and I smile.

"Is it now?" I ask and he nods taking my hand.

"Yes so you can get down from the McLaren now." He yanked at my wrist and I almost fell off Lando but Lando made sure to Hold me not paying attention to Charles.

"Ow fuck you" i take my hand away from him as he smiles.

"Y/n i swear if you fuck one of the Drivers im calling your mother" Charles says and I scoff.

"You wouldn't dare! And im not fucking anybody anyways... just having fun" I turn away from him but he doesn't let me.

"I'm being sirius. Nobody on the grid."

"How about I fuck you engineer and check if he will be able to focus on you again while I'm in that fucking garage?" I push his buttons.

"Y/n I'm not joking-"

"Stay out of my love life Leclerc. It doesn't concern you." I spat and Charles stared at me for a while, My head kept spinning and gods his lips looked angelic.

"Don't be like that" he asked and I swallowed harshly.

"You were the one who just tried to push me off a man's lap"

"I didn't push you off your over reacting"

"Maybe because i've been drinking for five hours straight to a party you made me come to?" Charles noted my comment and nodded then turning away.

"Well good point, still you try to much Xavi and I'm actually gonna punch you" Charles Grabbed his beer bottle and I scoff.

"Xavi and I have already fucked-"

"No!" Charles and his nöh's we're rather interesting.

"Yës!" I mocked him and he yanks my hand again.

"Say your joking!" He pull's me off Lando's lap and I stand up so that Lando let's go off my hip.

"Make me" I laugh and jump over some peoples feet as Charles launges up to catch me.

"Y/n i swear to god! Say your joking" I run through some people and out on the open where Charles catches me pushing me against the rails. His hand's lock me in place and I push mine on his arms trying to push him off

"What if I'm not?" I ask and he groan's his hand falling on my waist.

"I'm gonna push you off this boat" Charles said and I smile.

"Push me" I dare him and suddenly his hand's come up beneath my thighs picking me up and I shriek putting my arms around his neck and wrapping my legs around his waist as he set's me down on the railing.

"Okay, okay fine I'm kidding! Don't let go" I eased when he didn't push me further and simply let me sit on the rail and look down on him.

Charles breathed through and let his head fall in my lap for a bit.

"Your a torture"

"The best you can get" I lift his head he smiles.

"I don't get us" he says and I nod.

"Yeah you we're about to kill me and now your simping for me again, chose a side will you?" I laugh and he groans again.

"You wanna go home?"

"Can I sleep in an actual bed rather than Your old couch?" I ask and he scoffs

"That's a brand new couch" he protests and I frown.

"Alright get me down" His hand's came up on my thighs again and he put's me down and guides me back to the bar so he can pay his hand resting on my lower back.

"Alright we're off" Charles Kissed Pierre on the cheeks and I hugged Lando kissing his cheeks.

"Bye" I hit Pierre on the back off his head and ducked behind Charles when he hit me back.

"Fuck you" He muttered and Charles guided me down the yacht.

"The cab should be here any minute"

"Ugh" I took my phone out and leaned against his chest with my back.

"What are you doing?" He put his head on my shoulder.

"Following Lando On Instagram" I mumble as I go to DM him

"Why?"

"Maybe we can go out sometimes" I muse and he snatches my phone putting it in his pocket.

"No" I roll my eyes.

"Jesus I'm just being friendly Leclerc, give me my phone"

"No your fine, come on get in the cab" I stumble along the pavement until I Reach the car where He opens the door for me and lets me inside.

I take my Highheels off and he takes them holding them for me. I watch him.

His eyes as he thinks, his lip's as he tries to form words, his hand's (gods his hands) the way his fingers lingered on my shoulder and the way He breathed slower.

He helped me out of the car as i tip toed up the stairs to his apartment so I wouldn't get my feet dirty which he picked up on so he grabbed my by the waist and i shrieked again as he carried me up the stairs in a second.

"Jesus Leclerc you got to stop doing that! How do you have this much strength anyways?" He set's me down on the cold apartment floor after he opened the door for me and I walk into his Bathroom washing my face off and breathing through.

I take off the necklace and my rings leaving them on the small plate where all of his Rings we're placed.

Charles was sitting on his bed scrolling on his phone as I got into the room looking through his closet to get my favourite shirt.

"Can you help me with the dress please?" I ask and he got up unzipping it for me.

"Thank you" I mutter covering my chest as I pulled his T-shirt over my head and turning around to face him.

"Are you tired?" He asked and I nod with a smile.

"Yes very" I look at the clock at his desk which said 05:00 AM.

"Are you still drunk?" He asks and I shake my head.

"Are you alright?" I ask and he smiles.

"I don't think I've ever been happier." He tells me and I smile.

"I don't understand us" He tells me again.

"I know. I don't either. Not since we started to... I don't know become friends." I nod and throw my head back in despair.

"But let's not tonight, let's just be happy tonight and fight about it tomorrow?" He asks and I nod.

"I'm gonna go wash up you can go to sleep already?" He breaks us back into life and I push myself over to the bed falling down.

I don't know if I fell asleep or not but I felt him beside me after some time. I didn't want to open my eyes when I felt his finger's push my hair behind my ear, I didn't want to open them when he pulled me closer by the waist and I didn't want to open them when his lip's touched my forehead whispering a good night.

We didn't talk for a month after that. I went back to studying and he went back to racing, I got out of my mothers way when ever she tried to get me to something he was attending, we had both come to a realization that we did like each other, that we didn't hate each other and I noticed how people had started to ease around me when they knew Charles as if he had stopped Saying all those things about me so Initially I stopped as well, Just skipping over him when he came up in a conversation trying to get myself away from thinking about him.

"Come on we're going out" it was about 11 P.M. and I was sitting in the Library going over some material trying to memorize several text's.

"Hm?" It was a friend of mine Ashley who already took my coat and helped me up.

"You've been stuck here for five hours we're gonna go change and then go drink.

"I really have to finish this" I tell her but she already pulled me away.

We went to a shady club somewhere at the end of Monaco and she made me take about ten shot's one after the other before taking me to play bear pong.

"Y/n I'm off with- what's your name? Julio you have fun!" it was about two when Ashley left, I kept on drinking feeling myself in the moment and dancing with random guys I found at the bar.

It was four when i ended up outside walking along the street trying to think of somebody to call.

"Pick up" I pled Having Charles number pulled up while The phone started to ring.

"Oui? c'est quoi ce bordel? qui est-ce?" Charles picked up his deep voice made me blush immediately.

"Hey where are you?" I ask and I hear him shuffling.

"What? Y/n its 4 A.M? I'm at my apartment? where are you?" I heard him shuffle some more and yawn.

"So your in Monaco?" I ask and I hear him frown.

"Yes? Its summer break? Are you drunk? Where are you?"

"Not drunk! Just a bit tipsy" I balance myself on the pavement falling down.

"are you alright? where are you?"

"Fuck, I'm I don't know where" I look around.

"Are you alright? what happened?" I heard him stand up and go through his closet.

"Just fell down. Uhm I'm sorry I just wanted to.. I don't know we just haven't talked and My mother has been pushing but I just didn't want to see you" I explain and I hear his house door close.

"Send me your location I'll be there in a second" He orders and I sigh Trying to do as he says.

"Y/n can you hear me? your location?" Charles asked again after a while and I swallow a sob. I send him my location looking at his message which was sent a fucking month ago.

"Yeah, yeah, You don't have to come I'm alright I'm just sorry... I kind of messed us up" I tell him and hear him scoff.

"We're fine, your fine, I'm fine, I'll be there in a second just wait" I nod and hear how he gets in his car. I get up and start walking again.

"Y/n?" He asks and I wipe away my tears.

"Just breath alright?" He asks and I Breath through nodding.

"I'm sorry" I whisper and hang up looking around while i wait for him.

Gosh how I love his car. The black Pista pulled up on me and He got out putting his coat around me in a second.

"Jesus you look fucked-"

"Fuck you" I scoff as I wipe away my tears again trying not to cry as I lean into him.

"Hey, hey come on your fine" He pulled me into a hug and I nod against his chest and he Helps me into the car opening the door for me.

"Come on you wanna go to your apartment?" I shake my head.

"I wanna go to yours?" I ask and he smiles.

"As you wish Chérie"

We drove in silence and I took my High heels off.

"Thank you for getting me" I whisper after a while.

"Always" He smiled and I lean my head against the window watching him drive.

"I think you we're right" I tell him and he raises his eyebrow.

"I do like Ferrari the most.... at least if your driving" I add and Charles smiles.

"Thank you I believe myself to be a quiet good Driver" I stare at his hand's.

"can I hold your hand?" I ask and he frowns but holding me his hand anyways.

"Why? Don't bite me please" I laugh leaning into his direction as he let's me hold his hand, i don't hold it but rather examine it letting my fingers run over them, they we're solid and his skin was hard in some places.

"What are you doing?" He asks after a beat of silence.

"I don't know, trying to figure out why I'm attracted to somebody's hand's" I state and when i look at him I see how flushed his face has gotten.

"Alright stay for a second" he stopped the car and I look outside seeing that we have arrived. He opened the door for me and helped me out taking my high heels and I go up the stairs faster than he so he doesn't attempt to carry me up again.

"Let me" He opened the house door for me and I walk into his apartment falling onto the couch.

"Don't do that, go to the bathroom and wash up yeah?" He tapped my leg and i rolled off the couch doing as he told me.

I washed my legs in the shower for a second and cleaned my face off before finding myself to his bedroom where he got me a hangover drink and some water.

"Do you just have those laying around?" I point to the hangover drink which he hand's me.

"I do actually yes" I drink the shot of whatever the fuck is in those things and Cringe handing the empty bottle back to Charles who was smiling at me.

"Thank you" i mutter and see that he already laid out the shirt I liked.

"Can you help me with the dress?" I ask and he does unzipping it for me.

"Thank you" I mutter again and cover my chest as I slip into his shirt.

"Are you alright?" He asks as I sit down on the bed.

"No... I'm so fucking Tired" I laugh and he hands me the water bottle.

"Me too" he informs me and I press my lips together.

"I shouldn't have called you" I tell him and he scoff's taking my hand and pulling me into him so I flop down on his chest in exhaustion.

"I'd rather have you call me than anybody else" he tells me as I curl up into his side, he holds my waist and I feel how his breath steadies.

"Thank you Charles"

"I love it when you say my name" He tells me and I Smile turning around so I'm facing him, I lift my finger and push his hair out of his face so I can touch him.

"I think we're kind of unhealthy" I tell him and he laughs hugging me a bit more giving me enough room so I can bury my face into his neck and breath in his scent.

-K<3

[mcl38]

f1twt has been popping off since the race ended too. someone posted a clip of lando asking his engineer to "SPEAK up" bc you know, his engineer was giving him important information about the tyres and gaps to other drivers at that point. heaven forbid lando want to actually hear that information. anyway they posted that clip with this big rant about how "if yuki told his race engineer to shut up, we/f1 would be attacking him instead of laughing about it" and i was genuinely sitting there reading all of the replies like. people just say things without even listening to the 5 second clips they're discussing anymore because you can very clearly hear him ask his engineer to SPEAK up. it doesn't even remotely sound like shut up. (not to mention lando had been asking will off and on the entire race to please speak louder because he was having trouble hearing him). but point is these people really just say anything without 1 second to check if it's really true. i also. idk. as a poc, find it rlly weird to be using the actual racism faced by drivers on the grid to push an agenda against a driver you don't like, instead of viewing it as it's own separate and real issue? like do u actually even care about the racism or is it just looking for reasons to hate and push an agenda against another driver u care about. anyway sorry this is long, that pissed me off since i saw it but there are 0 braincells among f1twt as a collective so i rlly did not want to say anything and have them coming at me fjskcks

ok this is kind of bizarre bc i DID see the post talking about lando telling will to shut up and how yuki would've been crucified for it, but it DIDNT include the clip in it. tbh u couldve seen a similar take but i actually think ur misremembering the post, mostly bc no one was picking on lando for the 'speak up' radio (even outside of that post), they were talking about when he cut will off somewhere in those last 20 laps saying "i see i see i see, i'm pushing mate". and then the yuki fan CONTINUED TO SAY that lando's radio was 'nothing serious', they were just pointing out the double standard of how the journos / comms / fandom / marko rinsed yuki and claimed he was not fit for f1 because of his 'angry' radios. i do think that fan was wrong bc lando very much got similar critiques after sochi21, but to be fair to them most fans on twt weren't watching f1 3 years ago so like i wouldn't hold it against them. idk like twitter IS full of idiotic takes & the algorithm will push the most annoying ppl ever onto ur timeline in order for u to take the ragebait and engage, but like. i rly dont think this fan was hating on lando in general or was even in the wrong for venting their frustrations w how yuki is constantly carricaturised and underestimated. which again - maybe im talking abt another fan but its unlikely bc its this one who caught ALL the flack from all my lando stan mutuals so i think its the tweet ur also referencing.

anyways i dont think its necessarily making it a race thing to point out if theres double standards between drivers (especially re: british bias) even though again i dont think in this case they were correct specifically abt lando. but i also wouldnt find it outlandish to consider the outrage re: yuki's swearing is part of a bigger pattern of how east asian men r treated. i think yuki has been infantilised and woobified bc of his race and height throughout his career, and the cognitive dissonance created when he swears a lot (perfectly normal for ppl who dont speak much english / are ESL to swear liberally) is bc ppl cant concieve of the innocent little baby yuki in their heads being an adult man who can use swear words. and i think in that respect his career & public perception has had a similar trajectory to lando (who is infantilised for different non-race-related reasons lol), which is why i have a lot of compassion for yuki fans who r frustrated with it. especially in a casual liveblog situation that wasn't meant to be a Big Statement. but idk maybe thats my yuki bias showing

[rezzyromance]

Idk if this is how you request things or if it's just asking, BUT-

How would the Lords react to an S/O that's usually the chillest person that you will ever meet (not to be confused with a pushover because they are not), they've never seen them even mildly annoyed when something bad happens. But then something happens and, turns out, the S/O is utterly TERRIFYING when they're mad.

Hope this makes sense!

Aw man I'm gonna feel awful scaring Moreau and Donna :(

Alcina

You're relaxing on a beautiful morning. The sun is shining through the window just enough to warm the room but not hurt your eyes. You hadn't even changed out of your sleep wear. "How are you feeling, my dear?", a sweet voice rang from the doorway. You were sitting in your favorite chair near the window. You turn and smile at her. She walks over and rubs your face in her large hand before leaning down and giving you a soft kiss. "I'm feeling amazing. And you?", you grab her hand before she pulls it away and you place a kiss on her knuckles. "I'm feeling alright. There's a new maid here. She's a bit slow. I'm giving her until tonight to finish dusting the entire castle or else she won't see another sunrise." It was almost comedic how dark her words were as you both stared out the window and gazed at the beautiful scenery. "Come on Alcina.", you stand up and place your hands on hers, trying to hold them despite the size difference. "Give the girl a break. It's a huge castle AND it's her first day.", you knew your words would probably change nothing. Alcina was rather cruel, but you looked past it. You tried your best to make the nervous maids comfortable whenever they arrive.

"We'll see how she does." She gives you one more kiss before leaving the room. You sit back down in your chair, enjoying the warmth of the sun for a little while longer. You lose track of time, minutes maybe even hours go by. Suddenly, there's a crash not far from the door. You jump and stand up, no longer comfortable after being startled. "What in the name of Mother Miranda?!", you leave the room and look down the hallway. The new maid stood there with a terrified look on her face. In front of her was one of the paintings Alcina had on her walls, now with a broken frame and a hole punctured. Your blood began to boil. It was a painting of you, her, and the girls all together. It was your favorite. "How in the hell did you manage to do that?!", you begin to stomp towards her. She cowers and struggles to find her words. "I-I-I was just dusting! It fell and I-I didn't mean t-", you cut her off. "How the fuck did you knock such a large painting over just by dusting?! DO YOU THINK YOU'RE ALLOWED TO MAKE SUCH STUPID MISTAKES HERE?!", you unravel. "I-I didn't mean to! I'm sorry!", she almost begins to weep. "SORRY ISN'T GONNA SAVE YOUR ASS!"

"MISS DIMITRESCU PLEASE HELP!", she cries out. You freeze, realizing that the lady herself is right behind you. You turn to face her. Her eyes are wide with shock. She has never seen you like this before and never even knew you had this type of side to you. She was impressed as much as she was terrified. "(Y/N)? Are you alright my love?" She had no idea what to do as your seething slowed down. "Why don't you go back to the room, yes? Settle down a little and deal with her later.", she places a hand on your back helps walk with you back to the room. Once you're there, she bends down to whisper in your ear. "I don't know where this side of you has been this whole time, but I am so amazed by you. And also a little frightened."

Donna

The Beneviento house was usually a calm place despite its creepy aura. You and Donna are both quiet and chill people. Never once have you fought or even raised your voices at each other. It was pleasant.

You had planned a nice dinner for the both of you. You wanted to try out a new recipe and surprise her, so you made your way to the kitchen to get started. "Okay, what first? I guess I'll need a pot.", you go rummaging through the kitchen and you find the pots stacked within each other inside one of the top cabinets. You groan and stand up on your toes, grazing the pots with your fingers. It didn't take much to cause them to tumble down, crashing on top of you with a loud sound that followed. "Aw shit.", you sighed and picked up the knocked over pots. A small but annoying pain began to throb in your head from where it made contact with a pot. What you didn't notice was you forgot to pick one of the pots up. It remained unnoticed. "It's fine.", you say to yourself as you maintain your composure. Next, a cutting board and knife. You turn around and begin to walk forward to find the cutting board, but you slam your toe into counter. You wince in pain and grab your foot. "SON OF A BITCH!", you yell.

You calm yourself, still wanting to have a pleasant meal with Donna. "Alright. Everything's fine." You step forward and kick the pot that you had forgotten to pick up. It caused your freshly kicked toe to ache even more. "OH COME ON! GOD FUCKING DAMMIT!", you scream and swear as you throw your arms up in pure rage and shock.

"...(Y/N)?", a gentle voice whispered from the doorway, causing you to whip your head in that direction. It was Donna. She looked absolutely horrified and almost looked like she could cry. "Is.. is everything... are you alright?", she worried. "Yes. I'm sorry. Just got a little pissed off.", you took a deep breath to calm yourself down, feeling bad for scaring the poor girl.

Moreau

You were sitting on the dock together, looking into the water as your feet swung back and forth above it. It was a sunny day and you two decided to spend it outside. Your hand slowly made its way over to his. His feet stopped swinging for a second as you entangled your fingers. "I don't know what I'd do without you, (Y/N)." his words were bitter sweet as a gentle smile formed from his lips. "Oh, Sal. You don't have to think like that. I'll always be here for you.", you kiss his cheek and continue to relax as you sway your legs.

"There it is! There's the beast!", a voice yelled from not so far away. You both look in the direction of the voice and see a few young village boys. Possibly between the ages of 13 and 16. Moreau had become some what of a scary story for the villagers. A tale that kids spread on school court yard and bring up during dares. But, you've never seen a kid brave enough to actually make it far enough into the reservoir to actually see Moreau. Now, there were about 3. All of them stood and pointed, shocked and terrified.

"Hey beast! Come get me!", one kid teases. You glare at the kids as a newfound rage begins to boil inside you. "Let's go back inside.", Moreau says before standing up from the doc. The sadness in his voice was heartbreaking. Suddenly, one of the children gathers the guts to pick up a rock and throw it as hard as he could. His aim was off, but not by much. It slammed into the wood near Moreau's feet, startling him. "Take that you devil!", he laughs. "THAT'S IT YOU LITTLE SHIT!", you begin sprinting in the direction of the immature brats. Two of them run from the direction they came from while the one who threw the rock was frozen in fear. You took the opportunity to grab him by the collar of his shirt. "Listen here you little waste of space. I'm gonna give you 3 seconds to turn around and run for your goddamn life. If you or any of your little snot-nosed friends come around here again, they'll be goddamn fish food. Do you understand?" The kid was too scared to speak and instead began to nod rapidly. You let him go and watched as he ran as fast as he could, screaming the whole way.

You walk back to the shack and find Moreau standing in the same place he was when you took off. His mouth was agape and he looked almost as scared as the kids. "You alright Sal? I made sure those little shits won't be coming around here anymore." "Yeah... I didn't know you could be so... scary", he says. "I'm sorry. But those kids were being cruel. I had to do something.", you say. "Well... it was awesome!", he smiled. "But also very scary!" You laugh which helps sooth him a little.

Heisenberg

"Screw driver.", is all Karl said with an outstretched palm. He was working on some type of mechanical heart for his experiments. He wanted you to lend a "helping hand" even though he could easily do it all by himself. He did this because he wanted to be around you, he was just too stubborn with too big of an ego to simply say it. So here you were, handing him every little tool he asks for.

"Do you want the big one or the little one?", you say with a hint of boredom in your tone. "Aw c'mon don't sound like that! Isn't this exciting? It's like you're working on it with me! Also, hand me the big one.", you do as he says and hand him the big screw driver. "I just don't get it. You literally have powers. You can easily do this by yourself and have been for so long. Why do you need me to help?" He pauses for a second and looks over towards you, his brow slightly furrowed. "I don't NEED you to help. I just thought it would be nice for you to help out. Plus, you're the one always bitching about me constantly working. Well, here you are! Helping me work! So, either suck it up or you can leave." His harshness had no real ill will in it. He was just confused and a bit too ignorant to consider his words. But, he was testing your patience. He continued to use the screwdriver until handing it to you without saying a word.

"Hand me a screw.", he demanded with his hand facing palm up again. "Which size?" "They're all the same sizes, dumbass." You feel your blood begin to boil. "They're different fucking sizes! This one is smaller than this one!", you hold up two screws that are obviously different sizes. This makes Karl angry. Not because you were right, but because you seemed upset over something that seemed so insignificant.

"If you came here just to yap in my ear, then I don't think I need your assistance.", he huffed. You put the selection of tools and supplies he was making you hold on the table he is working on and ball your fists. "You're the one who told me to do this in the first place!", you yell. "Yeah, because you won't stop bitching! Non-stop you're always compla-" you cut him off before he can finish. "SHUT UP!", you yell. The room goes silent. "YOU SAY I'M BITCHING? HAVE YOU HEARD YOURSELF? JESUS FUCKING CHRIST KARL YOU BITCH AND MOAN ALL THE TIME! I'M DONE TAKING SHIT FROM YOU!" He wanted to be angry, but he couldn't. He felt something much more overwhelming. Was he.. intimidated? He didn't move from his seat. All he could do was look up at you with a confused expression. What now? What is there to do? If he pushes you further, what would happen? He was actually too scared to find out.

You take a deep breath to calm down before speaking. "Now, if you want me to help with your shit, I'll stay as long as you keep your mouth shut. Can you possibly manage to do that?" He gulps nervously. "Yes ma'am."

[butwhyduh]

Scared?

Jason todd x reader

Warnings: weapons, hint of sex

Summary: He shows off his scary equipment to see if you scare off. I write this months ago and never posted it. Idk y.

It was the third time that week that you sat in his room watching tv. Jay sat on the floor with some kind of equipment in his lap, tinkering as the show played. You sat on the bed with your back against the headboard wrapped in his blanket. Your fingers played in his slightly damp hair. He smelled like fresh shampoo and soaps.

“I don’t want to kick you out but after this is over I’ve got stuff to do,” he said before trying to change the subject. You looked at him suspiciously. He was never vague with his plans.

“What stuff?” You asked. He sat up a little straighter.

“Secret stuff. Vigilante stuff,” he said while twisting the equipment shut. It made a mechanical whirl noise before a red light came on. “Suck on that Tim. I didn’t need his help,” Jason said proud of himself.

“What is that?” You asked looking at the thing with no discernible obvious use.

“Scary secret spy stuff that I fixed without a computer.” He had a smirk of satisfaction on his face.

“So if I grab it you would freak out?” You said grabbing towards him. He quickly slipped out of your grip.

“Only if you wanted to blow the door off the wall,” Jay said twisting until the red light went off.

“Seriously?” You asked, with your eyes wide.

“No. But there is shit that you wouldn’t believe. But I can’t really show you. Hell, half the stuff in my pocket,” he laughed. “It’s just a tracer.”

“Shit I thought I was trying to grab a bomb for a second. Wait... what’s in your pocket?” You asked. He was standing and putting it in a bag. Jay stood a little stiffer.

“You already know what’s in my pocket. At least buy me dinner first.” He was deflecting. His joke didn’t make it to his eyes.

“No seriously. Show me your stuff. I want to see what crazy stuff you use at work,” you said also standing up. You got close to him, conveniently in front of the door. He tried to pull away but you grab his wrists. “I’ll thank you later.” You slid your thumbs up his forearms suggestively.

“Not even close,” he said plainly. He looked almost cagey but sometimes he just got that way.

“Baby,” you whined. “Show me.”

“No,” he said with a little different tone. He sounded almost annoyed. “You should probably get going now.”

“What the hell, Todd?” You said dropping his hands. “No. I’m not leaving. I’m tired of you being all secretive and shit. Are you 2 different vigilantes? Are you also a villain? Alien? What could you also be hiding beside Red Hood?”

“You wouldn’t get it,” he said stonily. You glared at him.

“That’s the fucking point. Tell me. Show me,” you said mad at this point. You had stepped into his space.

“You wouldn’t get it,” Jason said back slowly and deliberately, stepping right next to you. “It’s scary shit. I don’t-“

“You don’t what? For fuck sake. Just. Tell. Me,” you said almost mad enough to shove him but you held back. He loomed over you. You glared up at him.

“What if it scares you?”

“I’m not scared of looking at guns-“

“No, me. I use them. They are mine. They are part of me,” he said. It finally clicked. He had never cleaned his guns in front of you. Dick and Tim sometimes cleaned their weapons over breakfast when you visited. Jason was hiding it from you.

“Show me. I’m not scared of you,” you said softer. He stared at you for a minute before barely nodding. Jason dragged you down to the basement and pulled open a large panel on the wall. In it was a wide array of weapons nestled in black velvet covered foam.

“This is what I work with,” he said without taking his eyes off of you. You looked at all of the knives and guns and other things you didn’t even know.

“Can I touch them?” You asked him, interested. Your fingers already ran along the black velvet.

“Carefully,” he said. Jay stood close as you picked up a straight silver bladed, flat black handled knife. The curve of the handle was just a little too long for your hand but you liked the way it shined in the light as you turned it.

“That’s a 7 inch fighting utility knife, custom made for my hands,” he said. “It’s nice. Not my favorite.” You nodded and sat it down. You slid your fingers along the side of a hand gun, too scared to pick it up. “Pick it up if you want,” he suggested.

You grasped the gun. It was heavier than it looked. The sliver metal gleamed in the light. You kept your fingers fat from the trigger.

“It’s not loaded but you don’t want to make the habit of holding the trigger anyways,” Jason said sliding his hands around yours to show you how to hold it. You could feel his breath by your ear and your skin tingled. “You aim at something. Like the picture on the wall. And only once you know it’s perfect with no issues like wind, you move your finger to the trigger,” he said moving your finger to the trigger. You gulped nervously. “Breath out and pull the trigger,” he said before pushing your finger on the trigger. You jumped at the clicking noise. Jason laughed. He took it from you and sat it down.

“Am I scary now?”

“What is this?” You asked holding out a weird black knife. The blade was fatter at the end with a roundness that made it unique. You picked it up.

“Ka-bar combat Kukri knife. It’s kind of like a machete. Watch how you hold it,” he warned. You laid it back down.

“What’s your favorite?” You asked.

“This knife here,” he held up a nasty looking curved knife with a blade that just looked sharp. He made a few moves with it expertly. “Cuts right through Kevlar. Also really easy to cut yourself with it if you aren’t careful so I wouldn’t touch that. And these two guns are what I carry everywhere.”

“Everywhere?” You asked.

“Yeah. Any time I leave,” he said with a shrug handing you one. Silver metal hand gun that was a little bigger than the one you held and heavier.

“Like dates and stuff?” You asked.

“Always.”

“Okay I have undressed you and not found guns,” you said confused, thinking about all the times you’ve had sex in his car and he was wearing two loaded guns.

“Ankle, baby,” he said with a smile.

“But we... you were wearing this gun while we had sex?” You asked a little shocked. He laughed.

“Yeah, it was hot as fuck,” he said, putting the gun down and pulling you into a kiss. You broke the kiss.

“What about other stuff? I’ve seen bigger guns,” you said feeling shy.

“Seriously? Okay here,” he said pushing a button and the wall opened to show a wall of large guns. “These are mine. But I borough any other I need for a job. I wouldn’t really touch them.”

“Yeah,” you said taking a closer look. “What’s in your pockets?”

“Uh okay. Here,” he said pulling things out and putting them on a table. Gum, keys, a phone, a pocket knife, and a black block shaped thing. “That’s a taser.”

“That’s it?”

“For now. I felt pretty safe hanging out with my girlfriend. Unless you’re trying to kill me?” He joked.

“That’s the whole point of this. Be surrounded by your weapons and then kill you. Great plan,” you laughed pulling him close. He wrapped his arms around you in a hug but you chose to pat his pocket. You pulled a wallet from his back pocket. “Hiding things from me?”

“Yeah. Frozen yogurt coupons, a fake ID, and maybe twenty bucks. I feel so bad,” he said, looking at the ground in mock shame. “If I was hiding something you would never find it, baby. Trust me.”

“Not a confidence builder but okay,” you said with a laugh. He rolled his eyes.

“Nothing important. Now, the big question is, did I scare you off?” He asked losing the smile.

“Nope. Not a single chance. Second big question, why does a 25 year old man need a fake ID?” You asked.

“Well, I’m kinda legally dead and they don’t feel like giving driver’s license to dead people,” Jason said with a shrug but you could see that he relaxed.

“Ahh right. My zombie boyfriend. Now, this is a one time offer,” you said in a little huskier voice. You looked him over suggestively. Jason looked at you pleasantly intrigued. “What do you think about bending me over one of these weapon cases?”

“Fucking perfect idea,” Jason said with a wicked smile. He snatched you up causing you to yelp as he carried you to a case.

[ohheyitsokay]

I actually wanted to request something for the soulmate au but I couldn’t think of anything 😭 so a real cute one would be whiskey x reader and you can hear you soulmate sing. It was on the list but idk the number

Celeste! Thanks for forcing me to face my feelings about this man having a high school sweetheart in his backstory. Hope you enjoy my take on it!

Wordcount: 1.2k

Warnings: brief mentions of trauma?

>>

It started at a different time for everyone, but that didn’t stop you from wondering if maybe you didn’t have a soulmate at all.

Of course, this phenomenon was so thoroughly beyond reason, that there was no indicator that this would be true. Some didn’t hear the first song of their life partner until they were elderly and built relationships without it.

You best friend first heard her soulmate’s singing when she was just seven, blessed to spend most of her life in connection. She would tell you stories about her soulmate’s voice, how it had become a comfort, even a thread of communication for them. And you were there when they first met, in college, you watched her whip around, whispering “I know that voice!”

When the two of you were young, you’d speculate. Maybe their singing voice was embarrassing? What if they were shy? What if you were a secondary soulmate? It was fun, but over time, she would just squeeze your hand, and wait by your side.

Time had wandered on, and you had come to terms with it. It wasn’t that you were calloused, per se, but you had learned it wasn’t worth losing sleep over. You were working on loving the life you built for yourself, after all, and there wasn’t anything you could do to bend fate. 

But you cried when you first heard him.

Of course, you’d been under your table, trying to grab a runaway orange when the baritone filled your ears. Everyone had always told you the first time was overwhelming, but you hadn’t expected it to give you a mild concussion – you jerked right into the table. The tears weren’t from pain, though, but from joy in hearing it. It was a man, with an accent, and a voice that was warm and gravely and filled you from the top of your throbbing head to you toes.

-

The first time Jack heard you, he cried too.

A second chance? A second soulmate? It had been unthinkable.

But his mind was being filled with something sweet and rich and wonderful and for three minutes, it kept his confusion and guilt at bay.

The exact amount of time he needed to close his files, put everything safely away, and walk to the office of the Statesman’s counselor.

Part of him didn’t want to wait – he had half a mind to quit that day and go searching for you. It didn’t seem beyond reason to try to steal some of the organization’s tech to make it easier either, but after an hour of talking through it, he decided to start a little slower.

Jack made a playlist of all his favorite songs, unable to stop himself from throwing in some silly, fun ones. He would sing to you, first every evening on his way home, and then whenever he could. Once a week, he’d sit down in the little corner office and let himself acknowledge that for the first time in years, the romantic ones made his heart ache in a good way.

Listening to you on in the morning, hearing your voice become less tired, and letting it sink into his soul became his favorite part of the day. It seemed like you didn’t mind the pace, either, happy enough that the ball was finally rolling.

But, as it does, after just five weeks, fate gave it a push.

In the office, there were rooms filled with monitors, and people to watch the hidden cameras all around the world. Jack didn’t spend a lot of time in these rooms, hating the headaches the screens gave him, and the overload of visuals. He needed the information directly though, planning to meet another agent on the street for the takedown, so he was stuck hovering by.

The camera he and the tech were watching was in a taxi. First, the target climbed in, and they turned on the audio as the undercover driver tried to get some information out of him. It went as planned, until another passenger climbed in and Jack’s heart nearly stopped dead. Even through the speakers something about your voice – murmuring your destination – was making his senses scream. His ears burned, trying to determine if the warped voice he was hearing matched yours.

The target and agent were completely ignored as one of his songs came on the radio. He watched, enraptured as you paused, almost like you couldn’t resist, and started singing with it, quietly. The others in your shared space were annoyed, but your voice filled his ears, as well as crackling into the room, and when you added a little twang to one of the worlds it was all over.

Jack had never moved so fast in his life.

He was supposed to meet the driving agent in a minute, anyway, but he flung himself on the streets weaving desperately towards the corner of the block.

You had stopped singing, embarrassed as the two men in the taxi glared at you. It was just a song that gave you so much happiness you hadn’t thought about singing aloud, but there was something clearly going on. The car slowed to a stop at the corner, and you unbuckled yourself, telling the driver you’d just get out here. As you opened the door, however, a handsome, panicked man on the outside pushed it close. Panic rose in your throat, confusion outweighed by the sudden movement of the other passenger. It wasn’t his stop either, but he was yelling and throwing himself out of the car at a sprint.

Your door opened again, and you found yourself face to face again with the handsome stranger, intensity in his gaze.

“Darlin, do not go anywhere,” he said, in the voice you’d been hearing every evening, before he was gone, chasing after his target.

You were frazzled. Cars were honking, at some point your driver had gone missing, too, and you were pretty sure you just met the love of your life. You didn’t know what to do. After a moment of calming breaths and fidgeting, you climbed out of the taxi, closing the doors and turning on the hazard lights. Hovering on the corner sidewalk seemed just as safe as sitting in the backseat of an immobile car on angry streets, anyway.

Then there was a warm hand over your eyes and as you nearly jumped out of your skin, you heard is voice, singing the song you’d been singing minutes before; his song. You grabbed his hand, turning around eagerly, to see the handsome (now slightly scruffier) stranger. Behind him the other two men were trailing, one in handcuffs, but you hardly noticed them.

“Hello,” you said, almost laughing. His eyes were as warm and eager as his voice, which stopped singing, and he was already moving to hold you. “Is this going to be my life, now that you’ve found me?” You gestured loosely.

His broad shoulders shrugged, and the adrenaline must have been wearing off. For all he was clearly a hero who just got the bad guy, he looked awfully nervous. You gently pushing his cowboy hat up and ducked under it, so your faces were close.

“Next time, I won’t go anywhere either,” you said. His smile was broad and happy, both of you well aware of the subtext.

“Thank you, darlin.”

>>

taglist:

@fangirl-316 @0celestialbitch0 @scribbledghost

[were-all-just-stories]

Drunk Wonderland Squad on a Night Out Headcanons

idk this is weirdly specific but they won't leave me alone till I've written them out

(just gonna put this here- mentions of underage drinking, if you don't like that. x)

Peter — everyone thinks he's the guy you'd want to stick with (on account of him being such a mom friend in general day-to-day life) but he literally cannot hold his alcohol and after one/two drinks, you've literally lost him the entire night. He'll dance with everyone, ending & staying with Jason and will whisper musical theatre references back & forth with Ivy the entire evening. Gets incredibly giggly and is lowkey an amazing dancer, even when drunk. He loves a vodka and coke and can usually be found drinking one - Ivy introduced him to this. He's the first one to pass out (usually on the way home) but almost never gets hangovers which makes the entire squad super confused & jealous. Jason basically follows him round the entire night bc he's lowkey kind of worried and has to make sure he's alright. He gets extremely clingy (especially to Jason but also to everyone) and goes around offering everyone a hug (while Jason's following, acting all exasperated bc he wants to dance with him but lowkey loving it.)

Tanya — the person you'd actually want to stick with on a night out. Life of the party and will always make sure you're having a good time. She keeps everyone well stocked with alcohol and makes everyone join in dancing - even Matt. Can hold her alcohol much better than Peter but gets awful hangovers the following day. Really, really loves peach vodka - Peter is the only other person who'll drink it with her. She gets very loud when drunk and will start belting out off-key ABBA songs, Lucas will join in bc that's my girlfriend. She and Lucas have a tradition ever since they started dating of dancing together whenever an ABBA song comes on, anywhere, Lucas has almost broken a leg in an attempt to find Tanya when he's heard the music start.

Matt — lowkey kind of a buzzkill. Turns into your literal mother in Peter's absence (but, like, your strict, paranoid mother not the caring mom-friend) and is constantly checking the time/the people around him/where his friends are. Gets super paranoid that he'll lose his wallet or keys or phone and is constantly checking. Lucas always steals the keys to freak him out. He (Matt) spends the entire evening keeping a tally on who is where and is def the one you want to be with at the end of the night because he will get you home safe. Acts almost like a teacher counting the children: does head counts and is all "meet at the van at half twelve. If you're late, we'll leave without you." Of course, Lucas is always purposely half an hour late or something and bc Matt's not actually going to leave him behind, the rest of them just collectively watch Matt lose his mind as Lucas saunters over at one o clock. Doesn't drink too much at parties/raves so is the designated driver and prefers getting drunk in the comfort of St. Cecelia's where he doesn't have to worry.

Nadia — lowkey scarily good at holding her alcohol. It's really hard to realise she's drunk and she'll often sit calmly to the side, watching the carnage her friends unleash. Gets super intense when actually drunk - tho bc she's quite intense anyway, it can be hard to notice. Will often tag-team with Lucas to steal something of Matt's. She and Lucas have an escalating bet to steal something bigger/more noticeable each time. Once, she accidentally punctured the church van's tire while trying to steal it and they had to hike back instead. Only she and Lucas know what really happened. She and Ivy get really competitive whilst playing drinking games and often have to be stopped, otherwise they'll carry on drinking bc no way are they loosing to the other. At the end of the night, she is usually found sitting at the side bitching to Peter, who is half asleep and nodding along like he'll remember it in the morning.

Jason — similarly to his sister, he can hold his alcohol pretty well, contrary to popular opinion, which is that he's a complete lightweight because the first time he ever got drunk was on two beers and he threw up on Tanya's shoes. But he's evolved since then. Likes going to parties/clubs with dark lights so he can dance with Peter - he lowkey likes drunk Peter who can't stop hanging off him. He likes to play drinking games with Tanya, though Lucas has been banned from joining in ever since he attempted to shave his own eyebrows off when he lost. Lucas and Jason often end up daring each other to do increasingly ridiculous things, tho Jason is better at cutting things off when it gets too intense. Jason's love language is definitely touch and this is even more apparent when he's drunk. Like him and Peter literally cannot stop holding hands - luckily for him, it's dark so nobody can really see and, if they do, it's just played off as a buddy system to stop the other getting lost. Watching Peter sleep in the van on the way home makes him super sleepy so it's all he can do to help Peter inside and into bed before he's asleep too. Often gets really bad hangovers so Peter will bring him breakfast and they'll eat together in bed, maybe make some excuse for missing church so they can stay there longer.

Ivy — signature drink is a vodka & cranberry and it's always the first drink she gets. Usually ends up in the bathroom vomiting at some point bc she loves to mix alcohol with different outcomes - with varying results. She invented her own cocktail when extremely drunk one night which consists of vodka, lemonade, tomato juice, and raspberries. It is absolutely disgusting and nobody else but Lucas (who got such a bad hangover when he tried it, he thought he saw God) will go anywhere near it but she will attempt to convince everyone every time. Giggles a lot when drunk and often gets super emotional. Once cried because Peter spilled his drink on the floor. She gets really loud and is def the one person you'd find on top of a table dancing - Peter would be cheering her on from the floor. The best at placating Matt (even before he started liking her) and persuading him to stay an extra hour or so at the party so the rest of the squad always send her in to convince him. Often wears heels when they go out and is scarily good at keeping her balance in them even while drunk.

Lucas — off the rails. You go out on a night with him and you could wake up with no shoes in Quebec in someone's swimming pool with no memory of what happened. He will literally try any drink you offer him and is always up for dares - to the point where Matt has to intervene bc he's straight up about to jump in the lake with a plastic bag on his head. Extremely fun and you'll def have a good time with him but, if not restrained, the good time could end with a visit to the police station. Has no impulse/self control when drunk and loves to wind Matt up by stealing keys/something that'll freak him out. Will always show up late to their prearranged meeting time to go home and will pretend he's serious about wanting to drive them home to wind Matt up even more. Gets awful hangovers and, if they have class/church the next day, can usually be found either in bed or sitting in class/church with sunglasses and a hoodie pulled right over his head. Last one to fall asleep, he could probably keep going all night.

General —

* The squad usually have one night out a week/two weeks depending on what's going on/where it is

* They can't use church van often as it'll get noticeable so seven times out of ten they'll go somewhere in walking distance or else Lucas will somehow know these lowkey kinda sketch ppl who'll give them a lift (Matt will be freaking out the entire time)

* they'll usually spend Friday nights out somewhere and then Saturday in the common room/someone's dorm/the grounds if it's warm enough

* Peter and Jason attend about 85% of these nights and will plead homework or illness at least once a month so they can spend the night together instead

* Nadia attends about 60% of these and is less likely to go when Peter and Jason don't go but Lucas always tries to persuade her so they can annoy Matt & play drinking games

* Ivy, Lucas, and Tanya literally always go, Matt tags along most times with them bc 'someone's got to make sure they get home'

* Once or twice, Matt has stayed behind and gone to pick Lucas, Tanya, and Ivy up at one instead

* Nadia and Matt sometimes hang out when the others go - they watch scary movies together in the common room - Nadia keeps picking increasingly scarier/gorier ones to see how long it'll take Matt to ask to turn it off but he hasn't cracked yet

Super long post so apologies for that lol, again, feel free to add on/let me know what you think!

[silverlightqueen]

Tia and Tamera... and Nicole

fratboy and best friend!namjoon x reader, university!au, comedy, fluff, angst (and making out, if that counts as something idk lol) ft. twice nayeon, got7 jackson & skz hyunjin

For btswriterscollective’s 1 year anniversary contest!

Summary: y/n decides to make a big fashion change and, all of a sudden, is the object of attraction of every male within a hundred metre radius of her. Namjoon, her best friend, isn’t too impressed about it.

Rating: 15 (mature themes, explicit discussion of sex, strong language)

Word Count: 9.9k+

Warnings: lots of sexism/misogyny, the typical she-has-a-makeover-and-suddenly-every-boy-wants-to-date-her-trope, lots of gross frat boys, strong language, explicit discussion of sex, alcohol and drug consumption, making out, Namjoon is trash and doesn’t know how to text. I think that’s it but lmk if you noticed that I missed something!

a/n: hey guys ! it’s silverlightqueen back with another university au lmao i’m sorry :( thank you to the loml @silverlightprincess​ for proofreading, you’re the best and I love youuu !! I hope you guys enjoy this bc it was really fun to write !!

silverlightqueen masterlist

I got the divider off google (it has no relevance to the story but it kinda matches the colour scheme so we move lmao) so credit to whoever made it lol

joon: u up

y/n: don’t fuckboy text me

joon: so thats a yes

y/n: what do you want ?

joon: u free tmrw

y/n: it’s Monday tomorrow

joon: what about it

y/n: I got a lecture in the morning, but I’m free after 11

joon: ill pick u up nd take u 4 food

y/n: look at you, any excuse to drop in that you can drive now

joon: do u want food yes or no

y/n: what food ?

joon: mexican indian chinese whateva u want

y/n: yeah, sounds good

joon: rnt u gonna tell me what food u want

y/n: I’ll sleep on it

y/n: anyway go to bed, idiot, why are you even awake at 2.30 on a Sunday night ?

joon: y r u

y/n: questioning my existence

y/n: duh

y/n: now tell me why you are

joon: i just left jens lol

y/n: nvm forget I asked

joon: sure u dont want the deets

y/n: positive

y/n: goodnight you demon

joon: gn angel

‘Took you long enough,’ Namjoon exclaims as I open the front door of his car and climb into the passenger seat. ‘Wait, whoa. Hold on. What is this?’ Namjoon demands as I shut the door behind me, and I quickly turn to look at him. ‘What?’ I ask worriedly, and he shakes his hand in my general direction. ‘This. Your outfit. I’m confused,’ he says, and I relax, rolling my eyes, trying to ignore the way my cheeks are heating up and hoping he doesn’t notice it. ‘Why are you confused, Namjoon?’ I ask as though I’m speaking to a child, and he laughs, starting up the car.

‘I’m confused because I’ve never seen you wear anything other than clothes that are way too big for you,’ he says, and I make an indignant noise as he speeds down the road like the devil driver he is. ‘Don’t even deny it, you know it’s true. I started to wonder if you had something you were trying to hide. A growth on your stomach. A hunchback. A pregnancy. Or worse; no boobs!’ he says, gasping dramatically, and I hit his shoulder, holding back a laugh. ‘I wasn’t hiding anything,’ I say, and he glances over at me, eyeing my chest, before his tongue darts out to wet his lip. ‘You were. I always assumed you had small tits – a B cup, max – but obviously not. I can’t believe you hid them so well. They’ve gotta be at least a D,’ he says, and I roll my eyes, not bothering to disclose that I’m actually an E. He’d probably pop a boner. ‘And your legs,’ he says, and I look down at them self-consciously. ‘What about them?’ I ask, and he blinks before looking down at my freshly shaved limbs. ‘I’ve never seen them before. They’re nice. Smooth. And curved, with some fat on them. I’m glad you don’t have stick legs,’ he jokes, and I sigh. ‘Stop body-shaming,’ I say, and he lets out a little chuckle. ‘Am I not allowed to have preferences?’ he smirks, eyes on the road as he overtakes cars left, right and centre. ‘No,’ I reply, and he bursts out laughing.

‘So what’s with the new look? What prompted this reinvention? Because, I’m either still tripping from last night, or you’re actually wearing makeup too,’ he says, and I shift embarrassedly in the seat. ‘I just felt like it was time for a change. I wanted to experiment, try something new,’ I say, and he nods, face blank. ‘Okay. Now, do you wanna tell me the real reason?’ he asks, and I laugh, annoyed that he knows me so well. ‘I was getting changed in my room-’ ‘Okay, hang on, let me picture it,’ Namjoon says, and I hit him again, ignoring his chuckles. ‘So, I was getting changed, and Nayeon barged in and had a meltdown over… my body. She said that she was really annoyed with me for hiding my body so much, because if she had my body, she’d walk around naked. Or whatever. Something like that. I’d never really… looked at my body like that, but once she said it, I realised that maybe I could start branching out, fashion-wise. So she took me shopping, and this is the trial of new outfit number one,’ I say, and he listens intently, nodding in all the right places.

‘So how have people reacted today?’ he asks, and I get a little embarrassed thinking about it. ‘Some of the girls in my class started screaming when they saw me, and Taehyung asked if I was new here, and if he could get my number. Oh, and our lecturer asked me to stay behind to ask if I was okay, because I didn’t seem to be myself today,’ I explain, and Namjoon bursts out laughing. ‘You’re kidding.’ ‘Not at all.’ ‘Wow. All I’ll say is to ignore Taehyung. I think all that weed has caused permanent damage to his brain,’ he says, and I can’t help but agree, wondering how that boy can even breathe right anymore. ‘Well, anyway. Why did you used to cover up so much?’ he asks, and I laugh. ‘Are you just gonna keep quizzing me?’ I ask, and he nods instantly, grinning. ‘I’m intrigued, y/n. You have to understand that this is a lot for me to process. My best friend has transformed into someone else since I last saw her. My mind’s going into meltdown mode,’ he says dramatically, and I roll my eyes at him. ‘Drama queen.’ ‘I learn from the best. You. Now, anyway. Can you answer my question?’

‘I don’t know.’ ‘You don’t know if you can answer my question?’ ‘No, moron, I don’t know why I used to cover up so much,’ I say exasperatedly, and he raises an eyebrow. ‘I find that slightly hard to believe.’ ‘Fine. I wasn’t the most confident in my body. It’s hard, seeing all these super slim tiktok girls, petite and slight, and seeing them dress the way I wanted to. It’s like… I felt stupid wearing the same clothes they wear because they look so different to me. The way the media glorifies slim women… it’s hard for not-so-slim women like me. So I just hid my body in loose clothes for so long that it was what I was comfortable in,’ I explain, Namjoon still listening attentively. That’s one of the best things about him; he may be an idiot, but he always listens to what I have to say.

‘That’s… kinda sad, actually. Because – don’t get me wrong, your old look did suit you – but this new look? It’s great. You look really good, y/n, regardless of the fact that you’re not a super slim tiktok girl,’ he says matter-of-factly, and I smile shyly. ‘Thanks. So it’s a yes to the black and white check mini skirt and blazer set?’ I ask, and he nods instantly with a grin. ‘I can’t wait to see the rest of your outfits,’ he says, turning into the car park at the shopping centre. ‘There’s… quite a few to come. I’m a bit nervous about a couple of them,’ I say as he pulls into a parking space, and he gives me a greasy smirk. ‘I’m even more excited now,’ he says, and I swat at him, the boy chuckling as he ducks away from my hand. ‘I’ve just driven you to buy you food, and this is what I get in return?’ ‘Yes. You’re lucky I’m not beating the shit out of you.’ He sighs, checking his blond hair in the mirror before climbing out of the car, and I reach into the back and grab my bag before getting out too.

‘Oh, my God,’ he says, sounding shocked, and I instantly panic. ‘What?’ ‘What are those?’ he shouts, throwing his hands down to point at my feet, and everyone within a hundred metre radius turns to look at us. ‘Joon!’ I exclaim, embarrassed at him grabbing so much attention. ‘Sorry. But seriously? What are those?’ he asks, and I look down at my shoes. ‘They’re sock boots. What’s wrong with them?’ I ask, and he stares at them before taking a step back and looking me up and down. ‘Nothing. They look great. I’m just shocked to see you in shoes other than trainers. And is that a handbag I see instead of the usual backpacks?’ he teases, and I roll my eyes. We walk towards the entrance, and I struggle to keep up with him (I always struggle when walking next to him, but even more so in these boots). ‘Wait,’ I say, hooking my arm through his so I can slow him down, and he laughs. ‘Aww, struggling in your boots?’ he teases, and I huff. ‘Shut up,’ I pout, and he laughs again, looking at me with an affectionate gaze and an amused smile.

But the affection and amusement soon disappears. ‘y/n. You’re literally killing me here. Hurry up,’ he says impatiently. ‘Sorry, Joon. It’s my first time wearing heels though, cut me some slack. At least I haven’t fallen over,’ I say brightly, trying to put a positive spin on it, and he scowls. He’s been trying his best to walk slow but he’s now struggling not to walk at his normal pace – his legs are so much longer than mine. ‘Yet,’ he says venomously, and I gasp. ‘Was that a threat?’ I demand, feigning indignance, and he side-eyes me. ‘Maybe it was. I could stick my foot out right now and no one would ever know,’ he says in a wistful tone, and I shoot him a dirty look. ‘I’ll step on your foot if you try it. Then who’ll be laughing when my boots ruin your Balenciagas?’ ‘Me, because you’ll be buying me new ones.’ ‘With what money? I ain’t got money like that.’ ‘Oh, but you got money for clothes?’ ‘I always got money for clothes.’ ‘Get a sugar daddy.’ ‘You are my sugar daddy.’ ‘Huh?’ ‘Who takes me out for food at least twice a week? And buys me things out of the blue?’ ‘Damn. I really am your sugar daddy. This isn’t a good deal for me at all. You’re getting the daddy, but I’m not getting any sugar.’ ‘I’m not sure that that means exactly what you intended it to mean.’ ‘You know what I meant. I want my sugar, bitch.’ ‘Jen can give you sugar instead.’ ‘Okay, but Jen isn’t getting the daddy. You are.’ ‘She was getting the daddy last night.’ ‘Did you really just refer to my dick as ‘the daddy’?’ ‘Yes.’ ‘Never do that again.’

‘Where are we eating?’ I ask, and he grins. ‘Wang and Nayeon are waiting for us at Red Velvet,’ he says, and I gasp. ‘Yes! It’s been so long since we’ve been to Red Velvet!’ I exclaim, and he laughs amusedly. ‘I know. I was worried you might start getting withdrawal symptoms.’ ‘I thought we’d never go back. Does Seulgi still work there?’ I ask, raising an eyebrow, and he pulls a face. ‘Yep,’ he says, and I feel my eyes widen. ‘And we’re still gonna go?’ ‘Yes, because I’m a great person and make sacrifices for you even though all you do is abuse me and threaten to ruin my Balenciagas,’ he says, and I pout. ‘Sorry, Joonie,’ I say, putting on a baby voice as I give him puppy dog eyes, and he refuses to look at me, fighting a smile off his face. ‘Apology accepted. Now stop being the real-life version of that emoji.’ ‘Which one?’ ‘Don’t play dumb, you know exactly which one I mean.’

We round the corner to where Red Velvet is, tucked away from the rest of the shopping centre, and Nayeon and Jackson are sat in the window booth, watching a video on Nayeon’s phone together. When Namjoon and I enter, the little bell above the door rings, and both of them look up at us. Nayeon grins so wide I’m worried her face is going to split, and Jackson does a double take, eyes wider than an anime girl’s. ‘y/n?’ he exclaims, loud enough to catch the attention of everyone in the restaurant, and I shoot him a look, shushing him. ‘Oh, my God. What’s happened to you? Who’s this sexy thing?’ Jackson says as I slide into the booth opposite him and Nayeon, shuddering at the thought of my bare legs on the worn (and most likely, germ-carrying) leather of the seat as Namjoon slides in beside me. ‘Don’t refer to me as a ‘thing’, I’m not an object,’ I mutter, but my comment is ignored when Namjoon says, ‘literally my exact reaction.’ ‘No, it wasn’t. You did not call me sexy,’ I frown, and he blinks at me, looking surprised. ‘Did I not?’ he asks, and I shake my head. ‘Well, I thought you would’ve gathered that I thought that anyway. Based on the way I had to pick my tongue up from the floor when I saw you,’ he says, Jackson and Nayeon laughing as I roll my eyes.

‘You look good. Really good, y/n. I didn’t know you had boobs,’ Jackson says, inspecting me, and I try not to squirm under his scrutinising gaze. ‘Neither did I! Until I walked in on her naked!’ Nayeon says, Jackson’s eyes nearly falling out of his head. ‘I was in my underwear,’ I say defensively, and Nayeon rolls her eyes. ‘Details. But, yeah, after I saw her hot bod, I told her to stop wearing Billie Eilish’s hand-me-downs.’ ‘And gave her your hand-me-downs instead?’ ‘Excuse me, these are brand new,’ I point out, and Nayeon nods. ‘Yeah. You should know me better. I could never pull off an outfit like that.’ ‘I could pull it off you,’ Jackson jokes, Namjoon fist-bumping him as they laugh, Nayeon and I exchanging an exasperated glance. ‘I could pull it off you too, y/n,’ Jackson says with a little quirk of his eyebrow, and I roll my eyes, willing myself not to blush. ‘Jackson! y/n’s our baby, and we’ve gotta protect her from fuckboys, so stop being one,’ Nayeon says with a slap to his shoulder. ‘There won’t be any… fuckboys,’ I say, and all three of them raise their eyebrows at me. ‘You’re delusional if you think that. Just wait ‘til a frat boy sees you,’ Jackson says, and I frown. ‘Okay. That sounds fake, but, okay,’ I say, just as Seulgi appears to take our order.

‘Hi, and welcome to Red Velvet. What can I get for you?’ she says in the most bored tone I’ve ever heard. She must really hate her job. Even more with this moron sat beside me in here. ‘Can I get the Ice Cream Cake freakshake please?’ Nayeon asks, Seulgi gracing her with a rare smile as she writes down her order. ‘Can I get the Power Up brownie with Red Flavour ice cream please? And just water?’ Jackson asks, also getting a smile. ‘Can I get the Cookie Jar freakshake? And she’ll have Mojito cheesecake with Blue Lemonade. Thanks,’ Namjoon says, ordering for me too, but, unsurprisingly, he doesn’t get a smile. ‘Will you all be paying together?’ ‘I’m paying for mine and his,’ Nayeon says, pointing at herself and Jackson (she lost a bet with him a couple weeks ago, and owes him a meal). ‘And I’m paying for mine and hers,’ Namjoon says, Seulgi fixing him with a dirty look. ‘So this is who you’ve moved on to now?’ she demands, Nayeon and Jackson wincing. ‘Sis, you can have him,’ I say, unable to resist, and Namjoon shoots me evils as Seulgi looks bewildered. ‘Pardon?’ ‘I’m good, luv. Enjoy,’ I say, but she’s still staring at me, her mouth suddenly falling open. ‘y/n?’ she asks, and I nod, slightly confused. ‘OMG, I didn’t even recognise you. Girl, you look so good! I didn’t know you had boobs!’ she exclaims, and I have to stop myself from facepalming. ‘Thanks, Seulgi,’ I force out between gritted teeth, embarrassed as hell, but she doesn’t seem to notice, grinning away obliviously. ‘No problem. I’ll just get your orders put through and then I’ll come back for payments,’ she says, visibly perkier (nothing like seeing one of your friends unrecognisable after a makeover to cure a bad mood – apparently), before disappearing.

‘That was awkward,’ Namjoon says nonchalantly, all three of us fixing him with hard stares. ‘It wouldn’t have been so awkward if you weren’t such a dick,’ I say blithely, and he gasps dramatically. ‘Excuse me?’ ‘Don’t play innocent, dumbass. If you hadn’t had slept with Joy and Seulgi on the same day, we wouldn’t be in this situation. We’d actually have avoided a lot of situations if you weren’t such a dog,’ Nayeon says, brutally honest as ever. ‘Hey, I never made any kind of commitment to either of them!’ Namjoon defends himself, both Nayeon and I shaking our heads at him. ‘It’s common courtesy, douchebag,’ I reply, Namjoon sticking his tongue out at me. ‘I’d like to know what situations you’re referring to. I don’t get us into awkward situations,’ he says, all three of us giving him a ‘really?’ look.

‘Remember when we went out to that bar – what was it called again? Oh, yeah, Playing With Fire – and Jisoo threw that drink at you for blocking her on socials after you slept together?’ Jackson reminds us, Namjoon nodding slightly embarrassedly. ‘Oh, and when we went to Breakthrough, that club, and Sana got us kicked out by pretending we smuggled drugs in because you ghosted her after telling her you felt ‘something real’ for her?’ Nayeon brings up, all of us looking pointedly at Namjoon who nods sheepishly. ‘And that fight you got into with Daniel after you went ‘round telling people that Jihyo’s your sloppy seconds?’ I say, and he gasps indignantly. ‘I didn’t say that once!’ ‘Still. If you hadn’t had slept with her, that fake rumour wouldn’t have gone around,’ I say, and he pouts. ‘We could name several girls you’ve gotten us into awkward situations with. Chaeyoung, Hyejin, Wendy, Dahyun-’ ‘Okay, okay, damn. I get the picture,’ he says, the three of us exchanging looks.

‘Anyway, I need to go toilet. Come with me, y/n?’ Nayeon asks, and I nod. Namjoon sighs, reluctantly getting out of the booth to let me out. ‘Whoa, hold on,’ Jackson says, and I turn around to face him. ‘y/n… what you doing out here with all this ass?’ he asks, voice far too loud for my liking, and the few people in the restaurant turn to look at us disapprovingly. ‘Double cheeked up on a Thursday afternoon!’ Namjoon exclaims, before they chorus, ‘Hella ass!’ They burst into laughter, and my face is on fire, everybody in the restaurant staring at us (or, more specifically, my ass). ‘y/n, you dumb thicc, sis,’ Jackson says, and I take a deep breath before saying, ‘I’m going to go to the toilet now.’ ‘Take some ass pics while you’re there!’

joon: hey sexc

y/n: hey, what’s up ?

joon: wang wants 2 know if u nd nayeon r up 4 wing wednesday @ KPN

y/n: what time ?

joon: weneva imma get there 6.30

y/n: are there gonna be any other girls there?

joon: idk prolly the boys gfs

joon: y u asking so many qs u dnt have 2 come if u dnt wanna

y/n: I just don’t wanna be one of the only girls at a frat house with loads of stupid frat boys

joon: ill protect u bby

joon: me nd wang got u

y/n: much appreciated

y/n: we’ll come, but I’ll text you when we get there and you need to meet us at the door

y/n: I’ll feel awkward just walking in

joon: ok but call dnt text

y/n: you never answer your phone

joon: ill take it off silent 4 u angel ;)

y/n: thank youuu

joon: ofc see u tmrw

y/n: see youuu, goodnight joonie

joon: gn stupid

‘Wrong number,’ he says when he answers the phone, and I roll my eyes. ‘We’re at the door, come get us,’ I say, and he lets out a loud sigh. ‘I’m gonna lose my seat,’ he complains, and I huff. ‘Joon, please come get us. Do you know what it’s like being a girl around dozens of frat boys? You need to look after us,’ I plead, and he sighs again. ‘Give me a minute,’ he replies before the line clicks off. ‘Is he coming?’ Nayeon asks, and I nod. ‘Good, because it’s freezing,’ she says, clutching at her bare arms. ‘That’s what you get for wearing a t-shirt,’ I say, and she rolls her eyes. ‘It’s not like you’re dressed warmly either,’ she says pointedly, and I raise an eyebrow. ‘I’m not complaining about the cold.’ ‘Yeah, which I’m surprised about, because that top is thin as hell.’ ‘It’s not that thin.’ ‘Sis, I borrowed that top yesterday – it’s thin.’

I’m dressed in a black long-sleeve top tucked into a pair of greyish-whiteish joggers, with white trainers on my feet, a simple gold necklace around my neck with an initial pendant, a couple gold bracelets on my wrist and gold rings on my fingers. Nayeon’s in a pair of blue mom jeans and a black t-shirt, a cross body bag with both of our things inside it on her shoulder. Neither of us have bothered with full faces or pretty hairstyles – we’ve both got on basic makeup with our hair out and natural. It isn’t really that cold; it’s 8, and the air is starting to get crisp and cool, but the sun’s only just beginning to set, so there’s still a little warmth. Nayeon’s just a drama queen.

The door opens after a few seconds, Namjoon glowering at us, before he looks me up and down, his frown being replaced with a smirk. ‘Have I told you I love this new y/n? Like… this is a look,’ he says, and I grin at him, feeling a little more confident now. ‘I’m stood right here,’ Nayeon says with a half-hearted scowl, and Namjoon grins, grabbing her hand and pulling her into a side hug. ‘Nayeon, me complimenting you is like complimenting Mona Lisa. She already knew she was sexy as hell so what’s the point?’ he says easily, Nayeon preening as I roll my eyes. ‘You think Mona Lisa’s sexy?’ ‘Not as sexy as you.’ ‘Can we go inside? I’m cold,’ Nayeon says, not waiting for either of us to reply before she slips past Namjoon into the house. ‘Come on,’ Namjoon says, grabbing my hand and pulling me along behind him.

The second we step into the living room, the smell of strong cologne, alcohol and weed hits me and all eyes flit from Nayeon – who’s hugging Jinyoung and squealing – to me and Joon. Well, more me than Joon. ‘Woah. Who’s this? Surely not y/n,’ I hear Hoseok say, and I shoot him a dirty look, the boy grinning in return. ‘Shut it, stupid,’ I say, Namjoon continuing to walk towards the kitchen, dragging me along behind him. When we step into the kitchen, the smell of spicy wings hits me, and my eyes are instantly drawn to the takeout bags covering the countertop. But when I realise none of the bags are unopened, meaning frat boys have already been at them, it puts me off a little – I’d rather not eat food that might have been tampered with.

‘Look. My seat’s taken,’ Namjoon says pointedly, motioning to where Kai sits on a stool, beside Taemin and Seokwoo, the three of them laughing at whatever story Jaehyun’s telling them. ‘You’ll survive. What’s the point of having such long legs if you don’t stand on them?’ ‘There’s no logic in that. Go get my seat back,’ he says, and I side-eye him, wondering if he’s being serious or not. ‘How am I supposed to get your seat back?’ ‘Go flirt with him.’ ‘No! Him and Krystal have got a thing,’ I say, and Namjoon rolls his eyes. ‘That won’t stop him from flirting back,’ he says, and I glare at him. ‘I cannot stress this enough. Men are trash,’ I say before turning away from him, heading towards where there’s a couple dozen drink bottles and cups covering the countertop. I carefully pour myself a lemonade, making sure the cup’s clean and the bottle hasn’t been tampered with (I know Wing Wednesday is ‘for the boys’ so it’s unlikely it’s spiked, but it never hurts to take precautions).

‘y/n!’ I hear Mina exclaim, and I turn to see her stood there, smiling widely. ‘Mina!’ I squeal, pulling the girl into a hug. Mina’s one of Nayeon’s friends (they’re on the same course) but because Nayeon and I are inseparable, Nayeon’s friends are my friends too. Mina’s here because she’s dating Bambam, a KPN frat boy, and it makes me realise my privilege; Nayeon and I are only here because of our connections. If we weren’t best friends with Jackson and Namjoon, we’d have missed out on so many amazing memories. ‘How have you been? I haven’t seen you for ages!’ she says as we break apart, and I grin widely. ‘I’ve been good. Really good.’ ‘You look it. This style is, like, amazing! Is this new style permanent?’ she asks, and I smile shyly. ‘I think so. I actually… really like my new style,’ I say, and before Mina can speak, I hear Baekhyun say, ‘I like it too.’ Mina and I both turn to look at him, his stupid grin making me roll my eyes amusedly. ‘Hey, Baek,’ I say, the boy opening his arms for a hug, which I give (reluctantly). Baekhyun is Nayeon’s ex. They’re still friends – they’re actually on really good terms – but I’m still… cautious around him. He’s funny, and we get along, but I can never see him the same after hearing all the drama from Nayeon.

I clear myself a space on the countertop and boost myself up, sitting on the hard wood surface and Mina joins me, Baekhyun standing in front of us. ‘Have you had any wings?’ Baekhyun asks, and Mina and I exchange a glance, obviously thinking the same thing. ‘No, I’m… not really feeling wings,’ I say, Mina nodding in agreement, letting out little giggles behind her hand. ‘Aren’t you hungry?’ he asks, and, to be honest, I’m starving. But I am not about to eat those… frat boy wings, and neither is Mina. ‘Yeah, I could eat.’ ‘Let’s order some pizza then,’ he grins, and I gasp. ‘Pizza? On Wings Wednesday? Isn’t that against frat laws?’ I tease, and he rolls his eyes, pulling out his phone. ‘What toppings do you have?’ ‘Just get margherita.’ ‘Shall I get two larges?’ ‘Yeah, Nayeon will want some too,’ I say, and he rolls his eyes again, an amused smile on his face. ‘I’m not ordering pizza for Nayeon – I’m ordering it for us.’ ‘I’ll transfer you the money.’ ‘y/n… it’s pizza. You don’t need to transfer me money for it.’ ‘Why not? I don’t mind paying.’ ‘Yeah, but what kind of gentleman would I be if I made you pay’ ‘You’re not a gentleman,’ I reply amusedly, and he clutches his heart, pretending to be hurt. ‘I am.’ ‘You’re not. And you’ve made me pay for food before. Remember the Chinese we ordered after the LSG party, and you made me answer the door, so I had to pay?’ I say, and he winces. ‘Well… the pizza makes up for it,’ he says, and I just raise an eyebrow, amused.

It’s so… wrong that he’s only willing to pay for food for me now that he finds me attractive, but I won’t complain aloud; it’s free food after all. And then it gets me thinking. Maybe I should… take advantage of the effect my new look’s having. I mean, frat boys aren’t the… smartest, are they? Namjoon may be an exception when it comes to his education, but his common sense? He has next to none, demonstrated by the stupid situations his whore behaviour has gotten us into. And the rest of them are even stupider than him. I’ve always been a master of manipulation, and it’ll be even easier now they think I’m hot.

It isn’t long until the pizzas arrive and the second Baekhyun leaves to collect them at the door, Mina turns to me with a grin. ‘Girl, if you don’t take advantage of all these boys thirsting over you, I swear, I’ll be so disappointed,’ she says, making me burst into laughter. ‘I was literally just thinking about doing it!’ I exclaim, both of us laughing. ‘No, but for real. You should, like, make the most of it while it lasts. Not to sound nasty, but you know it won’t be long until there’s another girl they’re all into. You should exploit this opportunity whilst you’re still the… object of the affections,’ she says, making me laugh. ‘Exploit this opportunity?’ I repeat, and she nods with a grin. ‘Their generosity will only go to a certain extent,’ I say, and she raises an eyebrow. ‘Wanna test that?’ she asks, a challenging glint in her eye, and I grin, nodding. ‘Go look in the fridge, and when you’re asked what you’re looking for, say… Vanilla Coke.’ ‘Vanilla Coke?’ ‘Mmhmm.’ ‘Okay.’

I head over to the drinks fridge (they keep their food in the mini fridge and their drinks in the big fridge – their priorities are so fucked up) and open the door. I scan the bottles, seeing mainly lemonade and coke with a couple alcoholic bottles, but no Vanilla Coke. ‘y/n!’ I hear from behind me, and I turn to see Donghyuck stood there, a big grin on his face. ‘Hyuck! Hey!’ I exclaim, throwing my arms around him. Donghyuck and I did extra credit classes together last year, and I’ve barely seen him since. ‘You look so different!’ he says, holding me away to inspect me, hands light on my shoulders, and I grin, bending one leg at the knee and striking a pose, making him laugh. ‘It’s weird to see you in clothes that fit,’ he teases, and I roll my eyes. ‘Don’t even. Everyone’s making such a big deal of it.’ ‘Yeah, because you look hot.’ ‘Whatever.’

I turn back to the fridge, and he comes to stand beside me. ‘Whatcha looking for?’ ‘Vanilla Coke. I’m, like craving it,’ I lie, and he raises an eyebrow. ‘You’re lucky we’ve got lemonade and coke. KPN stick to basics,’ he says, and I roll my eyes. ‘Well, maybe you shouldn’t. Vanilla Coke is amazing.’ ‘Well, the corner shop down the road might have some. Shall we go get some?’ he suggests, and I’m shocked. Mina was right. He’s willing the leave Wings Wednesday with his frat brothers to go get Vanilla Coke from the shop with me. ‘You sure?’ I ask, and he nods. ‘It’s only a two-minute walk.’ ‘Okay. Let’s g-’ ‘y/n!’ I hear Mina call before materialising next to me. ‘Hey, Mina,’ I say, Donghyuck greeting the girl too. ‘Hey, Hyuck. I’m need to steal y/n. Emergency,’ she says, and my eyes widen. I’ve literally left her alone for a minute. What emergency does she have? ‘You okay?’ ‘Yeah, it’s just… I started. Do you have a pad?’ she whispers, loud enough for Donghyuck to hear, the boy wrinkling his nose in disgust, making me roll my eyes. Why boys are so grossed out about periods, I don’t know. It took two entire years of friendship with Namjoon to get him to buy me some pads. ‘Yeah, I do.’ ‘Will you come to the toilet with me?’ she asks, and I nod, apologising to Donghyuck before Mina drags me out of the kitchen, through the living room and upstairs.

‘Oh, shit! My pads are in Nayeon’s bag,’ I say when we reach the top of the stairs, and Mina lets out an annoyed noise. ‘I don’t actually need a pad, stupid! I was just getting you away from him,’ she whispers before pulling me into the bathroom. ‘What? Why?’ ‘Because now he’ll go get your Vanilla Coke from the shop and you won’t have to go with him,’ she says, and I raise an eyebrow. ‘Are you kidding? He’s not gonna go.’ ‘Yes, he will,’ she says, before letting out an exasperated sigh. ‘Remember when I stayed home for a few months, because I wasn’t well?’ she asks, and I nod – Nayeon was heartbroken that she didn’t have Mina to gossip with in her lectures. ‘When I came back, all the boys were fussing over me. Trust me; he will go and get that coke.’

We spend a couple minutes in the bathroom, reapplying our lipgloss and fixing our hair, before we head back downstairs, quickly grabbing two of the empty stools in the kitchen, Bambam sat next to Mina and Namjoon sat next to me, chatting with Minho about football strategy for their next match. ‘y/n!’ I hear Donghyuck’s voice after a few minutes, making me stop mid-conversation with Yugyeom about dessert on Monday at Red Velvet (it was so good, I can’t stop thinking about it – I might have to drag Namjoon back there this weekend). I turn to see him stood at the door, holding up a bottle of Vanilla Coke, and I have to stifle a laugh, pushing down guilt. ‘Oh, my God, thank you, Hyuck! You’re the best!’ I exclaim, giving the boy a hug before he disappears to find me a clean cup. ‘I was right,’ Mina says with a grin. ‘I feel bad.’ ‘Don’t. You didn’t make him get it.’ ‘Yeah, but I’m not even gonna drink it. I don’t like Vanilla Coke.’ ‘Well, it’s a good thing I do.’

joon: u got a lecture tmrw

y/n: it’s Friday tomorrow right ?

joon: um ye how do u not know

joon: r u still drunk from last night

y/n: I wasn’t drunk! I didn’t even touch any alcohol !

joon; then y were u letting johnny touch u up

y/n: I wasn’t! there was fluff on my boob and he took it off for me !

joon: ur so naive

joon: n e ways, do u have a lecture tmrw

y/n: yeah, 1-3

joon: wanna go 4 coffee after ill pick u up

y/n: sounds good

y/n: I’ll pay

joon: no

y/n: you paid for dessert !

joon: idc, ill pay 4 coffee

joon: u save ur money 4 clothes ;)

y/n: ew

joon: bitch do u want coffee or no

y/n: yes :)))

joon: ill b there @ 3, dnt b late like monday

y/n: okayyy see you at three joonie

joon: yep, night sexc

y/n: ew

joon: fine u can walk 2 starbucks

y/n: NO I’M SORRY

y/n: joon pls answer

y/n: stop leaving me on read !

y/n: fine, you can go to starbucks by yourself

joon: sorry

joon: y/n

joon: r u there

joon: bitch answer me

joon: ignore me if u wanna fuck

y/n: you’re such an idiot

joon: gn y/nie

y/n: night stupid, ilyyyy

joon: luv u 2 dummy

‘Hi, welcome to Starbucks! What can I get you?’ the barista asks, smiling widely. He’s handsome, with dirty blond hair pulled back into a ponytail and sparkling brown eyes, and I can’t help but smile back. ‘Hi, can I get two large iced vanilla lattes please?’ I ask, the boy nodding as he clicks away at the register. My eyes flit to his little name tag. His name is Hyunjin. Cute. ‘What name shall I put on the cups?’ he asks, eyes sparkling when he looks back up at me, and I smile shyly when I say, ‘y/n.’ ‘Pretty name for a pretty girl,’ he replies, not giving me a moment to process the compliment before he says, ‘that’ll be £7.40. Cash or card?’ ‘Card,’ a voice behind me says, and I turn to see Jaemin stood there, smiling. ‘Can I add a large iced americano to that too?’ he says, holding up his card, and Hyunjin nods, tapping at the register. ‘Jaemin, don’t. I’ll pay,’ I say, though it’s Namjoon’s money in my hand, not my own. ‘It’s fine, y/n. I don’t mind,’ he says with a grin, and I smile back, touched.

Jaemin moves around me to pay for the three drinks, and I feel a little awkward, stood behind him, waiting. ‘How have you been, y/n?’ he asks once he’s paid, and I smile. ‘I’ve been really good, thanks. How about you?’ ‘Yeah, great. You look… different since the last time I saw you,’ he says with a little smirk, and I roll my eyes, an amused smile playing at my lips. ‘I’m assuming that was a compliment.’ ‘Of course. How could it be anything other than a compliment when the ‘different’ I’m talking about is this?’ he says with a flirty grin, motioning to my outfit (a pair of tight black cargo trousers and a long-sleeved black top, big black stomper boots on my feet and silver jewellery).

Jaemin flirts with me for a little while, but his americano is ready before mine and Joon’s lattes and he has a lecture at 3.30, so he leaves with the promise of continuing our conversation at the ASP party tomorrow, which I had no idea about. ‘y/n!’ Hyunjin calls and I go over to grab the lattes. I notice a caramel shortbread on a plate beside the cups, and I look up at him questioningly, the boy grinning back. ‘It’s on the house,’ he says, and I can’t help but let out a giggle, flattered. ‘Thank you.’ ‘No problem… y/n. I’m a student, at the university, and I heard your… friend talking about the party tomorrow. I’ll be there, and it’d be nice to see you,’ he says, smiling as he leans against the counter casually, my heart jumping. He’s hot, he’s confident and he’s sweet – I could definitely see myself getting to know him. ‘Yeah, it’d be nice to see you too,’ I reply shyly, breaking off our eye contact after a few seconds. ‘See you tomorrow then,’ he grins before turning to deal with the next customer.

I carefully take the lattes and the shortbread over to mine and Joon’s table in the corner, the boy instantly biting into the shortbread. ‘That is mine.’ ‘I paid for your coffee, so I can have a bite of your shortbread,’ he says, mouth full of food, and I scrunch my nose up in disgust, sitting down opposite him. ‘No, actually, you didn’t.  Jaemin did,’ I say, dropping Joon’s money on the table in front of him, and he frowns. ‘Who’s Jaemin? The cute barista you were just flirting with?’ he asks drily as he picks up one of the coffees, taking a sip. ‘No, his name’s Hyunjin. And I wasn’t flirting with him,’ I say, embarrassed, and he raises an eyebrow. ‘Then what’s this?’ he asks, holding his cup out to me. I can’t hold back my smile when I see that Hyunjin’s written his number on the label with a smiley face beside it. ‘Exactly what I thought. Anyway… who’s Jaemin?’ ‘KPN Jaemin. He was behind me in the queue and he paid for our drinks. And then Hyunjin gave me the shortbread for free,’ I say, and Joon narrows his eyes at me.

‘I can’t believe you’re making these boys do all these things for you.’ ‘They’re doing it voluntarily – I’m not making them do anything!’ ‘So you didn’t make Donghyuck get your Vanilla Coke on Wednesday?’ ‘No, he choose to go get it!’ ‘Well, you’re putting Tia and Tamera to good use.’ ‘Tia and Tamera?’ I ask, confused, and he points at my chest. ‘Tia… and Tamera,’ he says, naming each boob, ‘don’t you listen to Doja Cat?’ ‘Not religiously – Say So’s the only song of hers on my Spotify.’ ‘Tasteless.’ ‘You’re tasteless for accusing me of using my boobs to manipulate boys,’ I hiss, and he rolls his eyes. ‘Did I lie?’ ‘Yes!’ ‘Okay, maybe I did. It’s not just Tia and Tamera. It’s Tia and Tamera and… Nicole!’ he says, and I blink in confusion. ‘Nicole?’ ‘Use your brain.’ ‘Did you just name my ass Nicole?’ I ask incredulously, and he nods, seemingly proud of himself. ‘People look at it more than they look at your face, so I think it deserves naming,’ he says bitterly, and I gasp. ‘That was low. People look at my face. I’m not just my body. My face is pretty too,’ I say coldly, a little hurt, and he looks guilty. ‘Well, of course your face is pretty, I just-’ ‘You just what? Judged me, even though you’ve slept with more girls than I’ve ever been friends with? Just remember that there’s a lot you’ve done that I could judge you on, but I don’t, because we’re best friends.’

The air is tense after I finish speaking, and I feel sick. Joon and I have never argued. Our friendship has always been so laidback, so chill, so easy. I’ve never had any downs in my friendship with him because we get along so well. But I’m surprised at him being so judgmental, and so… douchey about me getting some male attention for the first time in… well, forever. ‘Sorry, y/n. I’m being a dick,’ he says softly, and I can see that he feels guilty. I decide it’s best to end our argument here, because this isn’t a nice feeling. ‘Whatever, it’s fine, Joon. Anyway… you didn’t tell me ASP are having a party tomorrow! Am I not invited?’ I tease, and he grins, the tension between us gone. ‘No, you’re not. I’m tired of you being so dependent on me.’ ‘Shut it. You’d be lost without me.’ ‘Whatever. I was supposed to tell you about it at KPN, but I barely got to speak to you. You were… popular that night,’ he says quietly, not meeting my eyes, and suddenly, I can feel the awkwardness making a reappearance. ‘Ah, well, I guess there’s no point asking you to take me to Red Velvet then,’ I say wistfully, trying to change the subject, and he rolls his eyes. ‘Ask Wang, he’ll take you.’ ‘No, it’s fine. I don’t wanna be bloated at the party. We can reschedule to Sunday – order some for a hangover cure. Can I sleep over?’ I ask, and he nods, smiling to himself. ‘You and Nayeon are always welcome. There’s enough bed space for the three of us.’ ‘You say that, and yet, you end up on the floor with us two in your bed every time.’ ‘I’ll climb in with you while you’re asleep.’ ‘Isn’t that illegal?’ ‘Shut up and eat your shortbread. Or do you not wanna be bloated?’ ‘Matter of fact, you’re right. These cargo trousers are already tight.’ ‘That’s because you’ve got a fat ass.’

y/n: hey, is this hyunjin ? from Starbucks ?

hyunjin: yeah, and is this y/n ? the pretty cargo trousers girl ?

y/n: the one and only ☺️

hyunjin: I was worried you wouldn’t reach out to me after I saw you go and sit with that boy

hyunjin: I felt terrible bc I didn’t even ask if you had a boyfriend

y/n: oh no, he isn’t my boyfriend

y/n: he’s my best friend, namjoon

hyunjin: as in kim namjoon ?

y/n: yep, you’ve probably heard of him lol

hyunjin: I have lmao he has quite a reputation

hyunjin: I didn’t recognise him

hyunjin: I just saw you go and sit with a handsome boy and I felt awful

y/n: well, you don’t have to feel bad

y/n: and he’s not that handsome lmao

y/n: he’s just… namjoon

hyunjin: well, I’ll have to thank him when I see him

hyunjin: if he hadn’t given you my number from his cup, I’d have felt like an idiot

y/n: it’s a good thing he pointed it out to me lol

hyunjin: yeah, I’m relieved

hyunjin: I know it’s forward of me and I hope you don’t think I’m out of line

hyunjin; but I just thought you were really cute and I didn’t want to waste the opportunity

hyunjin: especially after jaemin paid for your drinks and flirted with you

hyunjin: I know it sounds silly but I was debating whether or not it was worth competing with him

y/n: jaemin’s not really interested, he flirts with anything that has a pulse

y/n: but I’m glad you didn’t waste the opportunity

y/n: I thought you were cute too, and I love your hair

hyunjin: ah thank you! I was a little nervous about growing it out

y/n: it’s unique, and it really suits you

hyunjin: thanks y/n :)

hyunjin: it’s late so I’m gonna head to bed but I’m glad you texted me, and I look forward to seeing you tomorrow !

y/n: okay, hyunjin, goodnight ! see you tomorrow :)

hyunjin: goodnight ! :)

joon: do u need a lift tmrw

y/n: no, jackson said he’s gonna pick us up

y/n: but thank you for offering anywayyy

joon: ok

joon: why did it take you 30 mins 2 reply its lit rally 2am, what else r u busy with

y/n: I was texting

joon: who

y/n: oh, just the, um, the girls groupchat, to talk about what we’re gonna wear tomorrow

joon: ok

y/n: I’m gonna go to bed, I’ll speak to you tomorrow

joon: aight gn dum dum

y/n: night joonie, sweet dreamsss

joon: ill dream of u in ur crop tops

y/n: pervert

joon: luv u ;)

y/n: love you more dumbass

‘y/n! y/n! y/n!’ ‘Oh, my God, Nayeon, you’re like a child! I’m mid-conversation!’ ‘I know, but this is important!’ she says, tugging on the strap of my top, her force nearly making me spill my drink down my outfit. I thought I’d dress simple, in just a black strappy lowcut crop top and a pair of ripped blue jeans, fluffy black slides on my feet and simple gold jewellery to accessorise. ‘Sorry, Dahyun,’ I sigh with a roll of my eyes, the girl grinning back. ‘It’s fine – go deal with your important business,’ she laughs, and Nayeon takes this as a signal to drag me into the kitchen, leaving Dahyun alone in the back garden. ‘What is it?’ I ask, and she grins. ‘I found your cute barista boy! Well, I think so, anyway. Not many boys have dirty blond ponytails.’ ‘Oh… okay.’ ‘Aren’t you excited?’ ‘I think you’re excited enough for both of us.’ ‘I’m serious, y/n! I saw him, and he’s really hot! You’ve been texting all day, and you said he’s really sweet. He could be your first boyfriend!’ ‘Nayeon, you’re getting ahead of yourself – I’ve literally known him for… 32 hours. And I don’t even know him, really. All I know is his name and that he works at Starbucks.’ ‘Well… this is your chance to get to know him. He’s with his friends in the living room – go,’ she says, not giving me a chance to reply before she pushes me through the open door.

He spots me instantly, calling my name, and I scan the room until my eyes meet his, smiles breaking across our faces as he waves me over. I head around the edges of the room, not wanting to get caught in the group of people dancing, until I reach him and his friends in the corner. ‘Hey, y/n! You look nice!’ he exclaims, smiling widely, and I feel butterflies; he really is so handsome. ‘Thanks, Hyunjin. You do, too,’ I say honestly, looking him up and down; his black jeans, loose blue and white striped shirt only buttoned halfway with a black t-shirt beneath are a chic and stylish contrast to the Starbucks apron he was wearing yesterday. Half of his hair is up in a ponytail with a few loose strands framing his face and his ears are adorned with earrings, sparkling in the low light. He introduces me to his friends, who all seem nice (I think I’ve seen a few of them before – I’m sure a couple of them are KPN frat brothers). As soon as the introductions are done, he asks if I’ll go with him to get a drink. He takes my hand gently – a shock running up my arm at the contact – and leads me into the kitchen, getting himself a bottle of Soju from the fridge. ‘Do you want one?’ he asks, and I scrunch up my nose – I find Soju absolutely disgusting. ‘Thanks, but I’ll stick to my vodka coke for now,’ I say, holding up my cup, the boy laughing as he nods, shutting the fridge after him.

We stand in one corner of the kitchen, chatting, and our conversation flows so easily. He’s an architecture and design major, but he does dance on the side too, with some of his friends. I ask him to tell me the basic things about him and I find out that he has a dog called Kkami, he loves autumn, he’s allergic to cat fur, his favourite food is sushi and his least favourite foods are onion, carrot and eggplant. Even though he’s so handsome (like intimidatingly handsome), he’s so modest, down-to-earth, and just so sweet. He’s like a breath of fresh air in comparison to the boys I spend time with on a daily basis (no shade to Jackson and Joon, but they’re nowhere near as gentlemanly as Hyunjin – he gets me two refills before I even realise that my cup is empty, and he gets me two slices of pizza as soon as it arrives because I mentioned I hadn’t eaten). I can already feel myself crushing on him; every time he compliments me, I get so flustered and all I can do is giggle – two weeks ago me would have hated now me.

After what could be hours (I’m having the time of my life chatting away to him), he asks me to dance with him, and I’m filled with an inexplicable fear. Actually, no. It’s explicable; I have never danced at a party before. Ever. ‘It’s okay… I won’t bite,’ he teases, and I take a deep breath, smiling as I nod. He takes my hand again, his touch so light and gentle, and instead of pulling me along behind him, he lets me go first, standing just a few inches behind me as we head into the living room. We mould into the group of our peers dancing, and I feel a little awkward at first, but I soon loosen up into the rhythm of the Rihanna and Bryson Tiller song pulsing out into the room. He’s really the perfect gentleman; he doesn’t lay a hand on me other than to move me out of the way when someone drunk stumbles past. It’s a nice change from the boys that don’t hesitate to just come up behind a girl and grab onto her waist, forcing himself onto her.

But after a while, I can feel the several vodka cokes starting to take effect, my mind a little hazy, and a tipsy y/n mixed with the RnB baselines floating out from the speakers isn’t a good combination. Hyunjin’s tan skin glows in the low light, his eyes sparkling, and he looks so fucking handsome, his plump lips stretching up into a flawless grin when I hook my arms around his neck loosely, moving closer. We dance a little more… intimately, our bodies pressed together after a few minutes, and his hands rest on my lower back, not venturing any lower, and his eyes stay on my face, even though my cleavage is right there. His gentlemanliness just makes him even sexier to me.

I look up at him, and notice that some of his hair in his face, and so I reach to brush it back behind his ear. His hair is so soft, the locks just gliding between my fingers, and I can’t help but run my fingers through the loose hair that he hasn’t pulled up into a ponytail, my nails gently scraping against the back of his neck. He shivers a little, his neck obviously sensitive, and it makes me look him in the eyes, practically getting lost in them. And before my brain can even register it, he leans towards me and my eyes flutter shut, his lips softly brushing against mine a few moments later. My first kiss.

He moves away, almost to check if I’m okay with it, and I just lean towards him, pressing our lips together again, making him let out a chuckle against my mouth. My mind numbs a little when he parts my lips with his, his tongue sliding into my mouth, and I really didn’t know that kissing was this good. His hands press into my back, holding me against him, and I grip onto his strong shoulders, his scent of lemony shampoo and expensive aftershave flooding my senses as our lips move against each other. ‘y/n, get a room!’ I hear Jin, one of Joon’s stupid friends, shout, followed by laughter, making me break away from Hyunjin, blinking as though I’ve just woken up, Hyunjin just smiling back at me. I turn to Jin, shooting him a dirty look and telling him to fuck off before turning back to Hyunjin. I feel braver than usual due to the alcohol and the fact that I’ve just kissed a boy I met yesterday in the middle of a frat party, and so I ask, ‘do you… want to get a room?’ ‘Um… what?’ he asks, blinking, and I feel the humiliation setting in already. ‘I mean, we don’t have to… but I thought you might want t-’ ‘Yes. I do want to.’

We’re both laughing drunkenly as we head up the stairs (it seems the several bottles of Soju he’s had have made him a little tipsy), our hands clasped together. ‘Whose room are we using?’ ‘Um, we can use Namjoon’s. I’m sure he won’t mind – he’ll be proud I’ve finally kissed a boy,’ I say, leading him into Joon’s room. The second we enter, he shuts the door, pushing me up against it and pressing our lips together again, his body against mine and our hands still intertwined against the door. I tangle my free hand into his soft locks, his free hand gently roaming up and down my side, and it’s bliss, the way he touches me. He’s such a good kisser – though it’s not like I have much experience anyway. ‘Did you say I’m your first kiss?’ he asks, lips moving against mine, and I let out a little noise of affirmation, the boy grinning. ‘Good,’ he murmurs, the word making my stomach turn with butterflies.

But it’s like I’m not allowed good things. There’s a loud hammering against the other side of the door, making both of us jump, and I manage to move out of the way just before it flies open, Namjoon storming in, anger all over his face. ‘y/n,’ he says, voice shaking, and I look at him in concern, wondering what’s happened. ‘Joon, are you okay?’ ‘No, I’m not,’ he says, teeth gritted, and it’s then that I realise; he’s angry at me. ‘Oh, did you… should I have asked you if I could use your room? I didn’t think you’d mind, I’m so-’ ‘God, you’re so fucking dense!’ he shouts, making me flinch, and Hyunjin looks between us before saying, ‘y/n, I’m gonna go, you guys speak in private. I’ll… be downstairs.’ I nod, too shocked to speak, and even more shocked at the way Namjoon stares daggers at Hyunjin as he slips past him.

‘What’s your problem? There’s no need to be such a dick to me, or to Hyunjin.’ ‘Oh, so you do know his name? I’m surprised, since you only met him yesterday.’ ‘Stop being so fucking judgy! You’re allowed to fuck anything with a vagina, but I kiss a boy I met yesterday and the world’s ending!’ ‘I’m not judgy, y/n, I’m jealous! Can’t you fucking tell?’ he practically screams, and the words don’t register with me for a moment. ‘Jealous?’ I echo, and he lets out a humourless laugh, sinking down onto his bed. ‘Yes, y/n, jealous. I’ve only been in love with you for two fucking years,’ he mutters, the words hitting me like a ton of bricks. He’s in love with me. My best friend is in love with me. ‘Joon, I-’ ‘You what, y/n?’ he asks angrily, and I’m filled with such rage, I want to slap him.

‘I didn’t know! If you’d told me, I’d understand why you’re so angry! But you didn’t, so stop fucking shouting at me, and being such a dick, and making me feel guilty when I shouldn’t!’ ‘There was no point telling you, because you don’t love me back!’ he shouts, and now I feel even more guilty. ‘I love you, Joon, but as my best frie-’ ‘And that’s why I didn’t tell you! I could deal before, when I was still getting to spend time with you every day, but now that you’re getting all this attention from all these boys, it’s so… difficult.’ ‘You still should have told me,’ I say quietly, and he scoffs. ‘There was no point! It doesn’t change anything! You still don’t like me!’ ‘No, I don’t, but you shouldn’t be angry at me about it.’ ‘I think I have a right to be angry!’ he shouts, and my eyes fill with tears. ‘Well, you don’t! Forgive me, Namjoon, but you’re not exactly a gentleman. Why would I fall for a boy that has a different girl in his bed every day, who plays girls like it’s his job, who’s misogynistic and vulgar and a dog? You don’t get to be such a dick to women and have your best friend fall in love with you, because it doesn’t work that way!’

‘Oh, and Hyunjin isn’t a dick?’ ‘No! He’s sweet, and he’s kind, an-’ ‘You’ve known him for one day, and you’re already rushing upstairs to lose your fucking virginity to him! I thought you’d care more about your first time!’ he shouts, still so judgmental, and I feel myself practically shaking with rage. How dare he behave the way he does and judge me, even though he’s supposedly in love with me? ‘Why do you care who I lose my virginity to?’ ‘Because I’m in love with you! Aren’t you fucking keeping up?’ ‘No, Namjoon, you’re not in love with me. If you were, you’d be happy that I’m happy. Instead you’re possessive and judgemental and douchey!’ We’re shouting at each other now, and anyone outside will be able to hear, but I don’t care. Let them hear how much of a dick he is. ‘I loved who you were, when-’ ‘When what? When boys didn’t talk to me? When you and Jackson were the only boys I spoke to at parties? When I was pure, untouched, innocent? Now, you’re annoyed, because I’m not who you thought I was. I don’t owe you anything, Namjoon, because you can’t expect me to have just known.’

‘Just go, y/n,’ he says, all of the anger in him disappearing, and he sounds so tired, looks so tired. And, as always, I feel guilty. ‘Joon-’ ‘No. Please, just go,’ he says, and when he looks up at me, my heart breaks. His eyes are full of tears, sadness, hurt, but the second they land on mine, they’re filled with love, too. Love that I can’t reciprocate because, he might be my best friend, but he is disgusting to girls. And I can’t love that. I can’t love him. ‘Okay. I’ll go,’ I whisper, turning away and leaving his room before I burst into tears.

[jiminrings]

homebound

pairing: yoongi x y/n

glimpse: race car driver!yoongi is a tiny bit fond of pit stop crew!y/n, grumpy crew chief!jimin will be the bANE of your existence, and jungkook is ur saving grace for bumper stickers whenever u wanna surprise yoongi :D

wordcount: 21k

notes: ok if u know charlie leclerc from F1, he was the inital reason why i wanted to write this au with yoongi!! think of this as an au with a mix of F1-level type of class and racing, but with a NASCAR type of pit crew that only has five members instead of formula one’s twenty!! i also asked my close friend for info since she’s an avid f1 fan to add on to my prior knowledge!! this is a work of fiction and accuracy does nOt always result to fun so pls just enjoy this!!! i also made a poll to what i should write next and this was one of the options and tHEN d-2 dropped and i was !!! ok it’s settled then // pic is from pinterest but i just edited it since it looked like it was shot with a 3210 hihi

also: you can talk to my characters!!! send in an ask anytime :D

(๑>◡<๑)

jungkook, as a person, is an excellent one

he’s talented, he’s kind, he’s driven, he’s gonna buy you your meal when you don’t have enough cash on you and would say “yA PAY ME BACK LATER” but in the end, he’ll just wave it off and say “nah i was kidding it’s my treat :D”

he’s also h*ndsome but you won’t say that again and again because his ego?? his bragging rights?? what then

jungkook, as a friend, is a fun, attentive, food-inhaling and money-draining carebear that can be pERSUASIVE if he needs to be

he lets u have the last slice of pizza!! or the last pringle or the last pearl in the massive cup of milktea you split with two straws and a giant butter croissant

he holds the umbrella up for the two of you when it’s raining and you’re sharing it

if he feels extra kind then he’ll be in the side in which there are more splatters and puddles to go through

if he feels like a sAINT then yes he may piggyback u but only if u hold up the umbrella because he’s a saint not four-arms from ben ten

7/10 times that he screenshots what’s in his cart but wouldn’t checkout, he genuinely just wants to show you because he’s excited and when you dO decide to get it for him, whether it was an actual shock or he just kept sending you screenshots until you got the hint, he makes sure to hug you until you physically can’t breathe anymore

he once saw this you liked that didn’t become your boyfriend because it turns out you were just a bet and you’re only worth a month of fucking gatorade

you’re not the most confident person ever in the worls but you’re sURE

you are worth more than month’s supply of glacier freeze for a no thoughts, head empty football jock senior

jungkook was sure too

if ur gonna be an asshat that he’s gonna hate anyway, aTLEAST make it cool blue because that belongs to top tier

he made sure he went to TOWN on that punching bag while looking at that dude

whatever he did, jungkook did with much more power and intensity and he is still maintaning eye contact after the airhead caught on and recognized him

HE NEVER SAW THE DUDE IN THE GYM AFTER

jungkook, as an athlete, is a beast and u gotta admit that

he played basketball in college while u played softball!!!

you were handpicked by your coach if you wanna try out for this once in a lifetime career opportunity aND it was sketchy at first

u kept asking on what was it about but all she said was “that’s for you to know.,.,., if you wanna accept the offer :))” and you were eventually driven to the edge because you wanted to know so badly

and then it turns out u were the ONLY one in your softball team to be handpicked as she said and then u were instructed to go to the gym in which there were chairs lined up

oh god is this a cult

there were a couple other people too and you could recognize some of them from the swimming team and this girl from weighlifting and that dude from football

they too did not have any idea at aLL

you just decided to sit by the last row... y’know... just in case....

and then jungkook strolls in confused as fUCK but in the same time excited and he sits beside you because he’s thinking the same thing of what if this was sketchy shit!!

you just knew him then because he looked familiar and you may have seen him asleep in your calc class a couple of times

and also because his hair was peach

how could u possibly forget that aha

“oH i like your uniform!!”

jungkook immediately spoke what was on his mind and pointed to your softball uniform u were still in and then your response was to freeze

ok that might have been too forward and-

“i know right?? oH MY GOD!! i signed up for softball in the first place because the uniform was sO COOL!!”

“bro i joined basketball because i heard that tHE WARMERS WERE SO SOFT”

:D

and then a friendship was born

the both of you were not thinking anymore about the fact that you’re both in a gym with no instructions whatsoever bc you’re too excited to be talking about what’s happening!!!

you joined a sport jUST for their uniforms?? oh my god i did that TOO

turns out that jungkook was actually great at basketball and he just knew then

also turned out that u were a gifted natural in softball even if you didn’t fully grasp the mechanics at first

“but when do i oH IS IT MY TIME TO RUN??? no?? not yet?? oh aha yeah i guess i run that fast :D”

the two of you bonded so good that it was immediately decided that u are really meant to be friends with each other

sometimes people mistake the both of you as a couple and u know what,,, sometimes the two of you take advantage of that because a fREE DESSERT?? ice cream on the house?? celebratory cake because jungkook one time jokingly went down on one knee and proposed a ring pop to you that he just saw LYING on the ground???

don’t mind if u do :)))

jungkook, as a fellow pit stop crew member, is a really comforting (and sometimes annoying) presence

he doesn’t question when you get whiney from the fatigue settling in and instead? he just whines with you!!

the impromptu meeting in the gym? it was actually an orientation and introduction to try out for a pit stop crew program for this really really popular racing organization :D

athletes were in-demand because the discipline and the speed and the skills were needed

and you were filtered furthermore and it just ended up with only the handful of you

of course you could opt out but if you do pursue to go through, and if you do exceptionally good, then you might just be one of the two people they’re gonna hire as a part of the pit stop crew after you graduate!!

god training was rigorous and the practical test was even more nerve-wracking

you were put in pairs and in groups to see how the camaraderie and teamwork would show and bEST BELIEVE THAT YOU AND JUNGKOOK.,.,.

exceptional

breathtaking

best work

not to toot your own horn or anything ://

aha and those two positions? of course it went to the two of you!!

but jungkook, as a fellow pit stop crew member but for your oPPONENT TEAM is beyond irking

you see...

it was guaranteed that you and jungkook would be accepted into the organization

what wasn’t guaranteed, however, is that the two of you would be a member of the same pit crew

u found that hIGHLY confusing because what for... you guys saw how kook and i work together.... don’t you want that idk intact?????

“hobi-hyung’s gonna win this time. i guarantee you that. i bet you HALF of my food allowance”

hobi aka jung hoseok is a force to be reckoned with

you always see him in races and u know enough about him because jungkook just won’t shut up about how great he is!!

he’s a very giggly and joyful person and sometimes you just can’t help smiling when you see him getting interviewed over by their spot

kook’s introduced you to hobi a couple of times eagerly now and hobi does not!! forget!! names!!

it’s a lil conflict of interest for you and jungkook to be openly best friends while being in oppositing teams, but that doesn’t seem to stop heh

hoseok shook your hand firmly and eVEN added another hand so your hand is sandwiched by his and he has a permanent :D on his face

u immediately got why jungkook was so fascinated and happy to be working with him

“i mean nO offense to hobi, kook, and he’s like a rEALLY really great guy and a great driver and i have tons of respect for him also i totally get why you’re whipped for him bUT-“

“ᵒᵏ ʰᵉʳᵉ ʷᵉ ᵍᵒ ᵃᵍᵃᶦⁿ”

“he’s great, but not min yoongi great!!”

he already had that coming

how can jungkook not anticipate that when you have said that to him a million times already

that guy barely even talks to you but he’s so chatty with literally Everyone But You

he has a theory

theorieS actually

ok first one is that ur a guardian angel for yoongi

WAIT NO HEAR HIM OUT FOR A SEC

you just gravitate towards him!! you wanna be around yoongi as much as you can in non-stalker way but rATHER in guardian angel ways

you and jungkook are almost always in the same place at the same time given your jobs

also sketchy for kook because it could be seven in the evening and you’d call him using the hotel phone and go

“eY JUNGKOOK do u wanna come with me to this pub :) to celebrate yoongi’s win today :) do you :) please :) say yes pls :)”

“y/n baby hOW many time do i have to remind you that i am yOUR team’s opponent,,, jung hoseok is the OPPONENT of min yoongi,,,”

“... how many drinks do u want”

...

...

“fINE i’m gonna wear a hoodie again and i’ll get a cab to tail your team’s car and i’ll come inside the pub five minutes after again and tHEN i’ll pretend to bump into you. a g a i n”

plus you always have the heart eyes for yoongi no matter how blank he is with you or frustrated he gets after a sucky race

second theory: you’re not a guardian angel; you probably just have a crush on yoongi

:O

wait does th is mean that lovers are like angels, and angels are like lovers?

goddamn

omg he should’ve just become a poet or something

get those hands busy with typing up the same message but in different wordings and nOT lifting up cars under time pressure or change a wheel like your life depended on it

lmao maybe he should become a singer or something

“but it is true!”

“you use his name as an adjective now!!”

“lol true the sunset was yoongi today”

god jungkook’s thinking if it’s possible to drown himself in this glass of water because eW you’re so in love and for WHAT

“what’s tHAT supposed to mean??”

“beautiful!! c’mon jungkook think every now and then!!”

yoongi just isn’t a name in the game

he is the name of the game

his dad was a famous racer up until his retirement

and then his grandfather set the family name into racing because boi is he a legend too

AND THEN HERE HE IS

yoongi’s been karting ever since he was like what?? six years old??

ultimately ever since he was a kid, he knew he wanted to do racing too

he just didn’t want his family’s reputation preceding him

(he was also thinking of wAIT do i actually have skills oR do i just have “skills” because it’s expected from me)

plot twist he did have skills

he tried out and just had his name as suga

and then when he knocked out those officials and got them sTANDING up from their seats because they really needed what was happening to sink in, that’s when he just dropped the truth bomb

“oh aHA actually i’m min yoongi!! nice to meet you!!”

he was just talented like that

so talented that he almost went with moto racing instead because he knew how to drive motorcyles!!

rode a bike twice and he immediately went pSH give me a motorbike nOW PLS :((

one time he fell out of balance and dislocated his shoulder and yoongi then decided that will never do that again lmao

the thing is, you haven’t had a proper lengthy conversation with yoongi that had some substance to it

it’s your default congratulations and you’re “oMG you killed it out there you were a bEAST!!” and him just going “thanks!” and then walking off

you wanna call him nicknames

if it’s not yoongi, then either it’s sir or it’s mr. min

and it’s no fun :((

how come jungkook can call hoseok HOBI

you really just wish you were as close

sometimes if you’re lucky, yoongi gets your name right!!

it’s okay!! yoongi’s just a little bit reserved with you!! that’s all!! :)

it’s a race day anyway and you all just headed out to the circuit fairly early

yoongi’s sitting by himself wearing a white shirt underneath his racing suit and uWu he looks so comfy :((

normally in practice days and practice drills, he’d be also sitting by himself as he looks wistful staring out

but no not really

he would pull out his phone a couple seconds later oR pass out and wake up when he feels like falling because one of his talents was to fall asleep sitting

sitting.,.. the seat doesn’t even need to have a backrest.,..,

the season is about to end and you dON’T want to pass another season without atleast attempting to invoke some reaction from him with how much you interact with him

you smiled at him more than a hundred times already but he just goes :] and then walks off AGAIN

you’re gonna be proactive!! you’re gonna do these moves!! yOU’RE GONNA OWN IT :D

you’re striding very confidently to where yoongi’s sat and he doesn’t take notice because his back’s turned to you and you’re walking too fast and motivated that he probably doesn’t hear you

wait maybe you need to back-track a little

“am i — am i supposed to know why you’re giving me a pill and what is this pill?”

maybe you should have done a better way to do this aHa

“w-what?? oH nO NO it’s not — it’s a caffeine pill!!”

yoongi’s mouth forms into a lil :O and he tilts his head, trying to register and find your face in the memory bank for his pit crew

“i just — i just noticed aND uh y’know it’s not only me?? it’s just that i- we know that you drink coffee a lot and you aren’t allowed to drink it when it’s an actual game and not practice, because it’s gonna make you pee-“

maybe you shouldn’t be talking about pee

this is the longest (one-sided) conversation you’ve ever had with yoongi without him walking away and you’re talking about body fluids!!!!

it’s okay it’s cool

he probably knows what you’re talking about anyway

everything he wears is heavy-duty fire-proof material from his undies to his racing suits aND so does the pit crew

it’s gonna make you sweat a lot!! it was a given

yoongi doesn’t drink much water in the first place and he only gulps down liters of it when he’s officially done with his race

he doesn’t drink coffee before an actual race either because it just does these things to him

caffeine makes him focused but the particular one that he favors makes him tOO focused

and also coffee makes you pee more than any other!!

plus yoongi swears too that he’s nEVER peed in his racing suit ever and he’s gonna stand by that no matter how much stoopid questions he gets or teases

“point is, you can be a liTTLE bit out of yourself when you don’t have your fix a-and i mean absolutely nO offense yoongi sir aha mmmmh just!! here!! a caffeine pill!!”

he’s looking down on your palm and he takes into detail that the pill was lying snugly on a bed of pREMIUM tissue paper

hmmm this looks like those soft tissues from his hotel room???? is it just him???

you put it there not oNLY for presentation, but also because giving it to him with your bare hands that are gettin sweaty with how nervous you are is unhygienic

god ur struggles

“jungkook is this tissue tOO crumpled?? like does it look intentional crumple, or like an effortless cUte crumple???”

“are u out of your fucking mind?? oh my gOD no it’s too crumpled!! let me do it”

y/n!!

that’s it!! that’s your name!! you’re y/n!!

yoongi can’t believe that there’s this girl from his pit crew that is giving him a caffeine pill because-

“this is nice of you. very considerate.”

yo

did yoongi just talk to you

u have officially lowered your goals in life!! you can nOW perish peacefully knowing that yoongi has said something else to you besides “thanks” :D

he snatches your lil napkin bed and takes the pill and your other hand is a bit lonely because you’re holding a bottle of his special water and-

did he just

did he just swallow a pill dry

people who swallow their pills dry SCARE YOU

they are to be feared honestly

however there are exceptions hehe

tHIS ONLY MAKES YOU WANT TO KNOW YOONGI MORE!!

although you really can’t

not when you can literally hear your crew chief’s footsteps towards you and you’re just smiling through :D

you don’t know a park jimin

no you don’t aha :D

sometimes denial is the key!!!

“y/n, go do some stretches with your crew.”

sometimes u really really just wanna rattle jimin back and forth

he’s a grumpy crew chief!! a strict one!! one that wouldn’t let an ice cream man give out treats, because in his words, it is completely unnecessary

vernon got assigned as ice cream man and his feelings were HURT

jimin’s exceptional, no doubt about that

his strategies coincide well with yoongi’s and it contributes to the winning formula

what you just don’t like is how he’s grumpy with almost everyone else, but he’s extra grumpy with you

you offered a piece out of your packet of gummy bear ones

jimin just stared at you up and down, eyes narrowed as he looks as if he’s been offended big-time

“are you trying to woo me with your citric acid obsession?”

woo wHAT

yOU WHAT????

“jIMIN-“

and then he crossed his arms across his chest as you’re trying to reason out that you were just being considerate and nOt trying to woo him!!!

“aish. if you’re gonna woo me, atleast go for a proper attempt. a granola bar. that’s good. i’m gonna deny you anyway, but atleast that one isn’t laughable.”

you cannot

you seriously cannot comprehend wHY is jimin like this

he has this habit of clicking his tongue and shaking his head and THEN walking away

people walking away from you is a trend apparently

“but jimin i already stretched aND warmed up today”

he hums at that but you have a feeling that your words are just going through one ear and out of the other

you just love being chastised by your crew chief in front of yoongi <3

“with jungkook?”

wait who is jungkook

yoongi suddenly has more interest into this conversation because uh who is jungkook and why does the name itself kinda intimidate him

he’s kinda familiar with the name but nOT the face

:(

is this your thing

is your thing giving out caffeine pills?? this is just a normal occurrence and he shouldn’t feel this AWED at the sentiment??

“yeah!! and we did both our warm-ups!! tWICE if i might add!!”

jimin knows about jungkook tho

he knows how you’re best friends and opponents in a technical sense

he’s a little wary of that still but he guesses that it just can’t be helped???

there’s a lot of talk on the field with how great jungkook is as a pit crew member anyway!! they were surely a bit confused too on with how the two of you were separated but it’s for the better (?) anyways considering that you’re both aces

good for hobi

good for yoongi

bAd for jimin!!! and you’re his favorite

his favorite when it comes to scolding even when you particularly haven’t done anything

tough love

“.... hmmmm”

“mmmmmh”

yoongi feels like he has to add on to the conversation because he’s gotta admit that it’s somehow entertaining

he’ll ask jimin later about this jungkook guy anyway :))

“i didn’t see it though. do it again.”

smile thru da pain :)))

yoongi placed second in this race though and although that isn’t entirely bad, he is still kinda upset because that just means he’s second best :((

hobi placed first!!

he’s all cool about it and yoongi doesn’t wanna be bitter but he iS mad at himself for not getting pole position for this race

so for every race for the season, there’s three qualifying sessions to determine your position in the grid!! if it all adds up and you’re the one with the fastest times, then u become the pole-sitter

acquiring the pole position aka being the pole-sitter puts a driver at an advantage because they’re first in line!! aND they don’t have to weave in between cars at the back and fight for getting ahead

it’s cool that’s cool :))) yoongi’s got pole position more than a handful times anyway :))) he’s just giving out chances for the others :))) 

he’s kind like that :)))

[ yoongi is bURNING in the inside tho ]

there’s what?? like eight more races in this whole championship season?? yeah he could make this work no pressure

the caffeine pill,,, however.,.,.,,

“well?? how did it work out??”

jungkook is beyond impatient now because you keep getting into telling the story of how it went with yoongi but you jUST kept getting distracted

it’s only fair because yah the race just ended and you and jungkook didn’t opt to go back to the hotel with your teams so you could eat out from the stalls here after a really tiring day!! you deserve it!!

“okAy so like i was really nervous, yeah?? so i walked and then oOOOOOH CHEESY BEEF FRIES!! jungkook look omg cHEESy beef fries!! hold on lemme-”

you are aging jungkook and he swears by that

“nO no!! here!!! i already bought them!!! can you just oH my god!! y/n please stand STILL”

he’s holding you still with both of his hands grounding your shoulders wHILE his hands are still holding up his food and drinks and none of them are spilling?

that’s: talent

he’s been antsy ever since you texted him before the race started that you’re diving in head-first without a proper plan!! he was writing an elaborate plan in bullet points on his dotted notebook and tHen you’re telling him that you’re gonna dive straight in??

first of all how dare u

second of all pLEASE just tell him how it went

“five bites of fries, two minutes of telling how it went.”

ok he is a really great negotiator and also you’re already shoving like three in your mouth so this is more favorable than what he bargained for

jungkook does find you a pain in the ass sometimes like there is nO denying that absolutely

but he can attest to the fact that you are a GREAT storyteller

like damn your emotions?? hand gestures?? how you’d eVEN switch positions so he could get visuals of how it went down?? perfection like so good that jungkook feels so flustered because omg?? so tHIS is why you have a crush on yoongi aha

you’re not gonna lie,, jungkook sometimes decreases your lifespan for a solid seven months at the least

but you’re lying too when you say that he isn’t a dAMN good listener/audience

his doe eyes get even bigger and he is dang expressive and he’s never insincere and doesn’t exaggerate tOO much to the point that it’s obnoxious!!

and he doesn’t pick any story of yours!! he is vERY genuine!!!

[ sputters while drinking his iced tea ] “jimin cockblocked aGAIN???”

[ crouches to the floor when you went out to the mall alone because he didn’t want to and ended up meeting owen wilson, the guy who voiced lightning mcqueen ] “WHAT??????? YOU WHAT????? YOU’RE TELLING ME WHAT???????”

[ sobs because he didn’t meet owen wilson ] “i’m just so *wails* i’m just rEGRETTING every *heaves* single decision i made a-and *fans tears* i should’ve just went with you :(((”

[ giggles and shrieks continuously for ten minutes and keeps hugging you because you bought him those big boots that you call romper stompers for his birthday ] “you did nOT!! oh my god they’re really mine?? MINE??? you’re telling me that these are mINE now??? omg omg i could die rn y/n i swear i LOVE YOU!!! i’m not gonna step on u i swear :(( thank you thank you :(((”

yoongi couldn’t be anymore smiley

like sure enough, his mind should only stay in the game when he is in the game

he can’t think about what he wants for dinner later that night or let his thoughts drift because otherwise, hE’S the one that’s going to drift

but maybe

just maybe when he’s at the last stretch and hobi’s already crossed the finish line and the closest driver behind him is like lmao a kilometer away

he just can’t help thinking about you!! and the napkin bed you made for his caffeine pill!! and how he doesn’t get why he’s never talked to you before because like you’re cute n all :D

he’s never seen a pit crew member talk back to jimin like that before and yeah sure you’re playful but not overstepping it ya know

“so jimin,,, y/n, amirite?”

jimin’s a lil bit confused because uhhh yoongi has never talked to him

about you before but he’s not that bothered

“... yeah?”

...

...

“jimin this is the part where you tell me about y/n”

“how was i supposed to know? you only said her name!! is that like a signal or wHAT??”

“couldn’t i be anymore obvious??”

the bottom line is that yoongi got a crash course when it came to you and he couldn’t be any more grateful for jimin

he’s also confirmed that jungkook isn’t ur boyfriend but that’s kinda debatable because jimin added an “i’m not eNTIRELY sure though” and yoongi hates him for it!!

there’s just something about yoongi that you can’t shake off

and you don’t wanna fall that deep because it’s just a crush!! just a harmless crush and u know you aren’t probably gonna stand a chance :((

although you’re just gonna keep that to yourself because kook will probably lecture you for five minutes and THEN smack you in the head because you’re bringing yourself down again

jungkook knows you’re a natural ace like c’mon yoongi’s just gonna be a piece of cake!!

yeah sure yoongi doesn’t initiate conversation with your or barely holds eye contact and can barely remember your name, only recalls you as part of his team, and can be ignoring the things you’re doing for him bUT I MEAN THAT’S NOT ALWAYS THE DETERMING FACTORS, RIGHT??right??

pls say right

jungkook’s convincing himself as much as you’re convincing yourself that u have a chance with yoongi

you can’t help it :((

you love that smile!! that smile when he knows how good he’s done that he automatically could tell that he’d be getting an extra point since he’s the one who was the fastest on that lap!or that laugh when he pops out a cork of champagne once again and he’s getting the hang of it

his calm demeanor looks so cute even when he isn’t even doing anything in particular and how it could be so hot especially when his stare’s just rigid

you’ve been in celebratory going out parties in bars with your team to know that yoongi’s just boisterous and chatty when he gets drunk

he even gets cLINGY to whoever’s sitting beside him and it’s usually jimin and he can even make jimin yield to having oNE more shot with him :((

in meetings too!!!

yoongi’s personal style is just mostly black and sometimes when he’s feeling spicy, he’d add in some random pastels or perhaps even a small nEON detail

his cheeks tooyou just wanna kiss them so bad :(((

they’re so plump and full whenever he pouts and smiles and you have to gRIP your fist just to get rid of the l*nging in your system

YOONGI HAS PIERCED EARS TOO

MULTIPLE PIERCINGS!!!you’ve never seen him wear earrings tho and that’s saddening

jewelry, most especially on drivers, is just a big no-no because just in cAse the driver catches on fire or not, it’s still a big hazard

you once saw yoongi walking in the hallway just as you were about to exit the elevator to go to ur hotel room and he was wearing a wATCH

u almost went feral goddamn

you see yoongi again after your caffeine pill advance on him? a necklace, maybe? those thick chain bracelets like the ones jungkook wears? him wearing rings? it could be a blinged-out diamond band or a heart-shaped plastic ring from a kinder egg and you would sTILL GO FERAL

“i just wish — j-just wish that red string lovers exist in real life, y’know, kook?? do you get what i’m saying?”

jungkook wishes that was a real thing too

you’re just a bit vulnerable because u have some alcohol in your system

a little bit emotional

meanwhile jungkook is just straight up bland and is up for no fun

three-drink jungkook is boring

you should see five-drink jungkook!! hE’S A WILD ONE that could backflip with a 70% success rate of not throwing up after

“i do. i wish that red string lovers do exist. kind of like that movie, kimi no nawa. i love that movie.”

...

“... jungkook. omg a-are you saying i should like, tie a red string on my pinky and tHEN on yoongi’s pinky!! in this way, i could always be connected to him and we’re like never gonna stay away from each other!!”

...

“i believe that would be called stalking.”

“no i meant fIGURATIVELY”

this three-drink jungkook is no fun

what you’re gonna do is get him to drink more because the motto for pit crew members is “drink as if it’s your last because it IS!!!”

drinking kinda messes up workout routines and the semi-strict diet the members are put on to ensure you’re all strong and enduring

so drinking is just reserved for wins or when the crew chief allows it and MAYBE just maybe when you and kook decide to get a lil sip and sharing a can won’t hurt :D

“okay, okay. another one!! drink another one!!”

you have to physically make jungkook drink because he doesn’t wanna hold the shot glass claiming that it’s too dirty and before he gets iffy even more, you just bring the glass to his lips and even put a hand underneath his chin because you are tHAT great of a friend

sometimes you just need to credit yourself for being a really great best friend to jungkook

four-drink jungkook is a BUNNY

he’s starting to ascend to his five-drink state and therefore through the process, he’s crinkling his nose more

the nose crinkle and the smile that highlights his two front teeth has always been in effect but this one’s just more persistent

he doesn’t hop like a bunny tho or like even stand because that’s six-drink dance bot jungkook’s moves

instead

he just-

cHOMPFS

jungkook’s just biting down on your shoulder SOFTLY

the same gentleness of a golden retriever with an egg on its mouth!!he’s not nibbling or biting down or anything!! he’s just oMPH :D

there’s no rhyme or reason to why he’s doing this and you’re unsure either lmao you’ve told him before what he does drunk when he’s sober and he goes?? lol what i do tHAT???

you don’t mind honestly

you’re thankful that you’re wearing a black hoodie and it’s made with a fluffy cotton material!! it’s a win-win and u can even feel jungkook smiling

the alcohol isn’t hitting you JUST yet but u. r aware that you’re getting a tad more chatty now and then suddenly you’re telling jungkook a summary of this sugar stars episode in which they were supposed to make cupcakes for this luxury jewelry brand and in oNE of the cupcakes there should be like a necklace worth thousands of dollars bUT THEY FORGOT IF THEY ALREADY PUT IT IN THE BATCH AND-

“hey, is this guy bothering you, y/n?”

you hear a velvety voice interrupting you and it’s oddly familiar

said person extends his hand to put on your shoulder and you kinda jolt at the sudden contact and it’s just goosebumps“.... yoongi?”

:O

yoongi’s on your left side and u could clearly see him nowhE LOOKS LIKE HE’S ABOUT TO SQUARE UP

i mean truth be told he wASN’T supposed to be here because after placing 3rd he just didn’t wanna go part because for wHAT and he wanted to go to bed instead

but them jimin called him and asked if he was sure because like... the entire team is here and the owner of the bar is a FAN and all drinks are on the house so,,,

he jUST got here and while he was looking for jimin, the first thing he sees is the back of your head (he’s memorized it hehe) and a guy bITING DOWN ON YOUR SHOULDER and yours hands are gesturing and shit

and so he’s beyond confused to see you confused over seeing him all confused and perhaps protective

“yoongi!!”

u practically squeal and ur not gonna hide that

although he just ignores that because he’s focused on some more pressing matters at hand

“man, seriously, what the fuck? can you just back off-“

yoongi is literally about to pull jungkook away from you because up to now this dude is NOT reading the room and the fact that he is 2 seconds away from decking him

“no nO yoongi!! it’s okay lol he’s my best friend! he’s not-“

there’s a delay on words sinking to jungkook’s ears so he’s just now reacting lmao

“mfhsIR thif if mY EMOFYONAL FUPPORT MFFSHOULDER”

jungkook’s angrily lifting his eyes but not his face with it so he’s-

oH THAT’S YOONGI :D

“this is my friend who’s kinda drunk and bITES my shoulder when he’s drunk aha jungkook!! say hi, gguk”

“hI YOOMGIIII!!! i’m jungmkook :D”

kook takes a quick second to lift himself off your shoulder to give an eager wave to yoongi

oH that face is familiar

jungkook?

jungkook jungkook oH THIS IS THE JUNGKOOK HE ASKED JIMIN ABOUT

whew

honestly he was kinda scared because when yoongi got a closer look when he was fuming, jungkook looked like a big buff guy and he was a little scared because-oh jungkook just went back to biting your shoulder ://

“i thought you weren’t gonna come?”

“i thought i was gonna fight sOMEONE”

hehe

you can’t help but feel a lil bit happy that omg yoongi cares for u

and although he’s mistakened jungkook as a pervert whose modus operandi is to bite at shoulders, it’s still the thought that counts!!!!

your right shoulder that has kook attached to it feels indifferent and your left shoulder that yoongi touched for a second is ON FIRE

be still, be calm. be still, be calm. be still, be — OMG YOONGI IS SITTING BESIDE YOU FUCK

“it’s jungkook, right?”

he, for sure, knows that it is jungkook alright but he just wants to ask u know

just to be sure

although you’re kinda oblivious to the fact that he’s directing the question to you more than to jungkook himsELF bc you’re very much swayed by his gummy smile

“yeah!! he’s jungkook, alright :D”

“this might be a stupid question to ask but uh i’ve just never seen him oR like maybe it might just be my memory but jungkook’s in our team, right??? or like nO?”

“o-oh aHA about that yoongi,, sir,, actually jungkook isn’t in our team, ya know? but he DOES support us and is like whoosh a fAN of you :))”

he is having too much fun with this one

“really? but i saw him in the box before, with you, i think? lol u silly goose if you have a boyf-“

“jUNGKOOK ISN’T MY BOYFRIEND! he never was!! yoongi trust me i am very single right now i mean it!! 100%”

“are you sure? like-“

“he’s just my best friend ever since college and we’re not a thing i sWEAR!! you see him in the box sometimes because he just needs someone to buy him nachos from the stalls aND he’s a pit stop crew member for jung hoseok-“

you’d like to think that you are diffusing this situation very well

“-and that tOTALLY doesn’t matter because pfft?! i don’t even know jung hoseok like wHAAAAAT does he uhm race or sth?? whew am i right lmao can i get an amen? ᵖˡˢ ˢᵃʸ ˢᵒᵐᵉᵗʰᶦⁿᵍ ᵖˡˢ”

yoongi already knows this bit of information and his eye does twitch at the mention of hoseok like how mr. bean is with mozambique but it’s COOL seeing you flustered is getting a really cheesy smile out of him

“do you rap?”

“no but do you want me to”

yoongi snorts and giggles at that and meanwhile you are getting THE nervous sweats because obviously you weren’t prepared for this

damn it :( you should’ve just kept jungkook sober so he could “wingman the fUCK out of you” in his own words

the only thing you could do that’s the closest to rapping is have jungkook beatbox in the background while u go bow chicka wowow bow cHICKA WOW :((

“you’re funny.”

yoongi’s still kinda dying at giggling throughout the whole interaction but he really means it sincerely ok

QUICK IS THAT A COMPLIMENT OR AN INSULT

“thanks :))”

fUck it you should’ve just said a one-liner or something, not a timid thanks or would that be trying too hard

you are getting too panicked and nervous now and the only out you see is-

“ggukie!! you want another drink?”

bless up

bless jungkook’s soul for immediately agreeing and before you know it, you’re lifting another shot glass to his lips with a hand underneath his chin

you’re gonna help him with his hangover tomorrow because he’s saving yOUR ass by easing the tension of how pATHETICALLY nervous you are with yoongi

yoongi’s persevering too because this jungkook guy has hands.. what?? does he drink his water from a formula bottle??? DOES HE NEED MILK

chile why is he getting jealous

it’s not like he’s become fond of you nor got attached to this girl that gave him a caffeine pill placed on a napkin bed after much observation of him and the sentiment behind it just makes him mushy

lol

couldn’t be him :))

:)

...

....

SIKE IT’S HIM THAT’S HIM :(((

“YOOOOOOONGIIIIIIIIIII!!!”

oh god 

oh no

it’s a drunk jimin :(

a drunk, happy, gIGGLY JIMIN

“Y/NNNNNNNNNNNN!!!!!”

you’re quite surprised at the sight because uH you’re used to jimin the grumpy crew chief

nOt jimin the giggly person who’s giggling at the little rainbows ur bracelet makes when the light hits it and who’s complimenting your hoodie sO HARD

mom come pick me up im scared

“y/n O-M-G where did you get those earrings because they r the bomb dot COM”

“jimin what did u drink because i am LOVING it”

“a pomelo gin mix or like fOUR of them.”

yoongi answers for jimin because he knows all too well

woop jimin’s hugging him now and his grip is tight o-okay i guess i’ll... keep you... still?

it’s not jimin’s fault :( he just likes pretty drink i mean could u blame him :(((

“aish those pack a punch for sure. you could barely taste the gin because of the juice-“

“-but it gets you drunk nonetheless no matter how much you drink it.”

:D

:D

you and yoongi are straight up CONNECTING right now vibing if u will

“yeah and some light it up on fire then take it out so it would taste smoother and seamless!!”

that’s it he’s had enough yoongi will propose to you rIGHT NOW he thought he was the only one who knew that fact

oR KNEW THE DIFFERENCE

or knew the reason for it that isn’t just to make it look cool

oh man you feel so sorry for pegging yoongi as just one of those “all beers taste the same” dudes in senior year :’’’)

“jUNGKOOOOOOOK!!!”

jimin kinda ruins the moment by opening his mouth being all excited as he points excitedly to look at who’s beside you

“YOOOOOOOOOONGIIIIIII!!!!”

“oh oh! shh!!! you’re not supposed to be here but it’s ok jungkooooook!!! i’ll just close my eyes!!!”

“h-hey guys *hiccup* have you seen jimin? because i can’t see him!!”

that’s not... that’s not how it works...

jungkook is giggling so hard and jimin’s gonna roll over anytime if it isn’t for yoongi holding him

“omg jungkook’s earrings look like windchimes :D”

“y/n omg jIMIN’S RIGHT! they do look like windchimes :D”

“i bet they also sOUND LIKE WINDCHIMES :D” jimin’s leaping out of yoongi’s hold eagerly and the both of u just know that this is gonna go bad

he’s about to faceplant because he’s slipping the moment he decided to break free

it’s a good thing you’re catching him and jimin’s embracing you now while

his legs are slack on the floor and jungkook the drunk dumbass thought it was an emergency

and in times of emergency apparently, jungkook’s move is try and hop on your back for a piggyback ride“okay, okay, time to get off y/n now!!”

yoongi chuckles as he pries jimin off of you and onto himself instead

jungkook sTILL won’t give up into having a piggyback ride from you hmp

“hey, wanna split an uber?

”you like that idea very much :D“who’s gonna sit with them at the back, though?”

“you can give me your number and i’ll volunteer tribute :))”:D

that’s good

this is good

yeah sure yoongi might’ve had to sit in the middle of jimin and jungkook that are messes

and has to endure it when young, wild and free by wiz khalifa came on aND

jimin went owo “young sound like yoongi omg”

and jungkook went and followed and the whole lyrics were yoongi wild and yoongi free

but that’s ok

that’s okay!!!

he had to say goodbye to you two floors early because that’s where jungkook’s room is and u need to tuck him in

the most he could do was walk you to the door while having a sleepy jimin use him as a crutch

all worth it though :))

“thanks for tonight, yoongi :))”

and there’s just this tentative silence because the both of you kinda felt dejected because you didn’t want tonight to end, truthfully

you press a tentative lil kiss on his cheek and

:O

“good night.”

yoongi’s cheek is tingling aHHHHHH HE’S ABOUT TO BURST

that’s so precious

YOU’RE SO PRECIOUS

alcohol doesn’t fix everything bUT ON RARE OCCASIONS IT COULD BE A BRIDGE

jungkook woke up with a killer headache because apparently when you and yoongi weren’t looking, jimin let him have a sip of his drink and he was immediately :O

but you did lessen it to an amount!!!!!

he could barely register what happened last night but what he did remember is yOONGI

just yoongi

aND THAT MEANS HE COULDN’T REMEMBER UR LITTLE CHEEK KISS :D

eventually you’d tell him but not now

jungkook’s all smiles when you were telling him on how you tucked him to bed and eVEN caved into giving him a piggyback ride

your explanation of you making him drink a full bottle of water and then some more is the reason to why he felt bloated and every time he moved in his deep sleep he was just sLOSHING around

although you didn’t get to do his skincare routine on him because he likes tapping his face

and tapping jungkook’s face while he’s drunk is like choosing death because he’d think that there were little ants on his face and he’d freak the fUck out

so you just took a makeup wipe to get the dirt off his face and put on a face mask!! minimal effort!! maximum results!! efficiency :D

yours and jimin’s dynamic is chANGING FOR THE BETTER he’s getting warmer to you now!!!

you did tease him one time about the pomelo gin drink and he glared at you

but then you whispered to his ear

“if it’s between your choice of pomelo pink gin and yoongi’s whiskey? i’d pick pink gin all the way :D”

jimin gasped out loud

friendship? bUILDING

you and yoongi??

safe to say that you’re on the closer side :D

i mean tECHNICALLY you aren’t on the commitment boat yet or like… you haven’t had a date yet…. or held hands…..

but you’re getting there!!! iT’S A PROCESS

you’ve always been his supporter in the sidelines but now u r a full-pledged cheerleader for him in the moments that you aren’t tending to his car or tending to work

practice sessions are held starting two days before the race

it’s literally just for practice and it’s for the driver to get familiar and to test out some things that may need to be tweaked furthermore

this is the only time the drivers get to drive the cars besides the actual race itself

and the race is held on sunday!!!!

two practice sessions on friday that last one and a half hours each

and a final practice session on saturday that lasts for an hour

obviously you’re there

bUT when you’re not in use, you just completely revert to cheering for yoongi by the barrier!!!“GO YOONGS!!!!!”

jimin sends you a look to keep it down because even though he has his headphones on he could sTILL hear you

you shut up of course but not without waving your hands in the air whenever yoongi’s car comes into your view :D

in qualifying sessions too!!! these are to determine the driver’s grid positions in the actual race

and eVERY driver’s goal is to earn pole position, the front-most and most advantageous position from the starting line!!!

pole position doesn’t automatically mean that you’re the winner but it does help the driver to ace at that closer!!!

you shut up in qualifying sessions because in fact, you’re nervous too there are six more races to this whole season and each one is important because yoongi and hobi?? they’re just neck-to-neck with their scores and although yoongi’s on the lead, he could nEVER BE COMPLACENT

yoongi’s pole-sitter undoubtedly with his performance and then could you breathe a sigh of relief :))

he’s stripping his racing suit slightly and by that he means taking off the velcro and getting the zipper undone and taking off his balaclava and

oBVIOUSLY his helmet

fact: race suits are extremely light but are sO HOT

yeah sure there’s been upgrades to it and that it has cooling properties now but u can’t exactly feel that when you’re gonna be in it for atleast an hour doing a proper race

his routine lately is going sTRAIGHT to you after he finishes whatever he’s doing

“you didn’t cheer me on :((“

“that’s because i was too busy rooting for you in my mind :))”

“well then root for me with your mOUTH”

“what”

“wHAT??”

yoongi’s just being a little petty and cranky, that’s all

it doesn’t mean that he doesn’t give much affection, he automatically doesn’t want to rECEIVE it :(((

admittedly, you’re kinda cutting off from the physical affection with yoongi lately because jungkook quizzed you and you’re pretty sure that you were in a default :O after

“who texts first?”

“me!! our schedules don’t exactly match up because he has a different trainer than our pit crew does but i just wanna wake up extra early to send him a text :))”

“who sleeps earlier?”

“yoongi!! lmao he loves resting whenever he can aND he even brings this diffuser with him whenever we gor from hotel to hotel!!”

“who goes to who more frequently?”

“oOoOhhh i love visiting yoongi!!! whenever i surprise him he just looks so shocked and eventually it sinks in to him”

“who exerts more effort?”

“kook i — oH.,..,.”

of course jungkook is so happy for you because look at you!! you went from admiring yoongi from afar to hanging out with him actively and even going so far as to have him kiss your cheek once!!

but no matter how supportive he is, he jus wants to be as realistic too because he doesn’t want you hurt

yes he admires how you are with him but like mAYBE you’re far in too deep and yoongi is not on the same level

and so you just came to the conclusion that maybe you were just being too enthralled in it to not see that yoongi doesn’t find the concept of you

and him together as desired as you found it to be

:((

and so maybe you’ve been detaching yourself lately

you stay in bed sleeping for as long as you’d like, and the only alarm clock you have is jimin ringing the bell on your door to let you know that training

was to start

jimin quickly catched on to what you were doing because he’s seeing less of you around yoongi??? surprisingly???

and he just couldn’t keep it in to not know what was happening so he asked jungkook

then jungkook was positively surprised and happy because jimin???? coming to him personally to ask???? omg he is gonna spill of course and so jimin was like eh… it’s the least i could do i guess….

five rings of the doorbell to wake you up

seven rings to let you know that training’s gonna start in ten minutes

ten rings to oPEN YOUR DAMN DOOR

you didn’t linger around yoongi unnecessarily and you weren’t sending those specifically niche templates you see on instagram that make you laugh

he doesn’t receive the “you’re a daughter of an astronaut and a swimmer and you’re not sure which aesthetic to pick because you’re too dizzy from accidentally inhaling chlorine in the big-ass man-made pool since you intern at nasa and u just need to lie down” lookbooks :(

he thought of it as nothing at first because eh they’re just little things!!! he barely notices anyway

WRONG

yoongi feels so devastated because why :(( won’t :(( you just :(( hUG HIM OUT OF THE BLUE LIKE YOU ALWAYS DO

these days he feels so on edge because aHa!! anytime now, y/n’s gonna hug me :D

but then you dON’T

yoongi put on extra perfume because you like burrowing your nose to his neck whenever you hug him and wHY aren’t you hugging him

wait maybe it’s the perfume that’s throwing you off??

nevermind he’s gonna buy another hundred-dollar bottle of a different perfume it’s ok nO WORRIES and sometimes you don’t join the team breakfast and yoongi’s all lost

because hMmM??? i got u these pancakes a-and i already put the butter and the syrup….. why aren’t you here…

you’re with jungkook and his team knows about your friendship and how it came to be and they’re all just eH it’s okay y/n’s cool anyways :))

hobi’s so kind

jungkook sits in the same table as hobi and therefore that means you sit beside kook and u have no choice because he WILL insist

not because you’re his friend but also because he’s too lazy to stand and get another serving so he’ll just steal some from your plate

hobi eVEN offers to refill your glass with orange juice because his is gone too and he’s gonna get more anyway :))

yoongi can’t go over it though and he’s just wallowing because first, hoseok’s aiming for his title that he wants to retain, and nOW HOSEOK’S COMING FOR HIS Y/N???

ok his might be a little bit of a reach because he hasn’t asked you out yet but he iS getting there

he swears that he feels so lost without u :((

and so yoongi’s persistent and he vouched his day-off to be aligned with your gym day aaaand he’s here now :D

he’s right behind you!!

“hiii.”

yoongi squeezes in on the space left at your side

well you dIDN’T expect yoongi today clearly“hi pls back up a little i mAY accidentally kick you :D”

you’re doing pull-ups at the moment and you’re getting the hang of doing them!! even if this used to be the bane of your existence in your workout program and you’d sell your soul just for jungkook to call you and cry on the phone and pretend he stubbed his toe or something to get out of training

so tHAT’S yoongi’s greeting??? :((

“i haven’t seen you lately”

“hmm? i see you everyday, yoongs”

“rEALLY??”

you’re only discovering now that while doing pull-ups, you can aLSO make and maintain conversation!!

yoongi’s a bit sarcastic because your full attention isn’t on him and he guesses that it’s a given when you’re working out bUt are you even hearing what he’s saying :((

“doesn’t feel like it, though.”

ok that one made you falter a little bit

“how can you say??”

he practically huffs at that and that also goes noticed

how can you not know that???

he’s a patient person but with you, he just gets sO eager and whiney and now he just can’t cope!!!

just when he thought you were finally go down because you were slowing your movements, you were oNLY doing that just to regain your momentum for another set AND!!!

fine then :))

yoongi’s jumping up and his hands wrap around the higher bar snugly, his body pressed to yours

he’s so close oh my god yOONGI’S SO CLOSE TO YOU

you’re suspended in air and a bit breathless and yoongi’s just hanging slack and he’s about to burst into a smile because uH success!!!

his lips look so kISSABLE and his cheeks are plump and his eyes are v enchanting and wHEW you’re sweating at this point and it’s nOt from working out

yoongi only tilts his head as he earns the reaction he wanted and more :D

“who’s your trainer? sehun?”

“y-yeaHh???”

“m’kay.”

he’s not content just yet and for a split second, yoongi tilts his face to the side of yOUR face and his lip barely brush to the shell of your ear

“i’ll pull you out of this one. eat lunch with me.” the sound of yoongi dropping back down to the floor makes you jOLT because oh.,., oh that rEALLY DID JUST HAPPEN HUH

what a menace

your heart is too weak for yoongi

you are sO whipped :’’’)

so whipped that you cave into jungkook’s demands

jungkook’s aLWAYS been your sticker guy

he just has stickers… that he either makes or acquires but he isn’t telling where from… and either gives or sells them to u

he has this label maker too that could print your name on or whatever you want to put on your stuff

he would even input little stars or little hearts or even lil dinosaurs if you want him to!!!

you don’t know how and why but wHEREVER you go, jungkook always has stickers on him

AND THIS IS REALLY SPECIAL OK

you specifically told jungkook to curate like a ten-pack out of the things you told him about yoongi

he has the reigns aS LONG as he thinks (and it better be) that it screams min yoongi!!

it’s just that you wanna give gifts to yoongi and you don’t need aNY occasion just to give presents

you were deep in thought and your head blanked and then went…

stickers…. get him stickers

snickers???

…. stickers ….

sNEAKERS???

…. stickers dUMB BITCH i said stickers!!!! …..

lol u love ur mind

and when you said that to jungkook, he fell both honored AND pressured like what if yoongi decides not to like you anymore because of your (his) sticker choices

what then

damn ur wrong for this

jeez jungkook’s becoming the backbone of your blossoming relationship ://

sigh but it’s cool,, jungkook’s used to becoming a fundamental part to society

jungkook’s ringing your bell so early in the morning because he just got done last night with completing his collection!! and you iMMEDIATELY need to see it as per his insistence

ok they r pretty cool

there’s yoongi’s name in a really cool yet sophisticated font that just screamed yoongi to you!!

there’s Agust D in a big bold formal font!! you remember that story of how yoongi was born and raised briefly in daegu then they had to move and he misses his hometown

he was about to use Agust D as his name when he first tried out for racing but the name itself made so many heads turn so he was just,,, too spicy,,,

i’ll make it suga

OMG YOUR INITIALS

jungkook’s wild for that one but omg you’re giggling because wow u like that

“clouds?? and the sky’s purple??”

“i think eVERYBODY likes clouds”

“well some pilots don’t”

“what makes them think that clouds like them back?”

wait

“a cat??… flipping me off???”

“lol ok funny story but yoongi flipped me off once LMAOOO”

“… he did what”

“i’ll tell u the story later but this, THIS — okay i don’t know if it’s just me, but yoongi looks like a cat, y’know?? like i sWEAR i could see cats in him, and then i see him in cats. do you get me??”

“gguk-“

“and he wears headbands, right? LOOK I EVEN DREW HIM A HEADBAND!! :D”

ok you aren’t gonna lie

this ten-pack goes pretty fucking hard if you may say so

“how much do i owe you, kook?”

“that would be fifty dollars :D”

“fifty wait wHAT?? FIFTY DOLLARS?? WHAT??? JUNGKOOK SAY SIKE”

psh atleast it was worth a shot

“fine. tHIRTY dollars.”

“THIRTY DOLLARS?????”

you know for a fact that these ten stickers aREN’T worth tHIRTY DOLLARS

the highest jungkook’s ever charged you is $10 for a pack of ninety-nine he even took one from the sticker booklet and he only said that after he sold it to u

you both know that these aren’t $30 :((

it’s always a take it or leave it situation because you know hobi is a sucker for stickers :((

“…. fine.” you pull thirty dollars from your wallet and that’s thirty dollars ur never gonna get back

jungkook’s a bit frazzled because wHAT

you actually gave him tHIRTY dollars??

they don’t even cOST _____ dollars!!!

it’s just awkward now when he tries to take back what he said

“… as a special gift.,.,. i’m gonna put them.,.,. in a nice envelope.,., that i uh doodled hearts on…”

quick if jungkook was a seller on redbubble, how many stars would you rate him

this better have a gREAT PAYOFF

spoiler alert: it did!!!

YOONGI LOVES THEM

“i mean i’m not saying you should put these on your race car because i kNOW every gram matters on it and like — sTICKERS!! u can stick them anywhere am i right :D”

:O

“do you uh,, do you like it? ˡᵃʸ ᶦᵗ ᵈᵒʷⁿ ᵍᵉⁿᵗˡʸ ᵒⁿ ᵐᵉ ᵖˡᵉᵃˢᵉ”

“y/n bABY ARE YOU KIDDING ME?? i love them sO MUCH!! like look aH OMG IT’S ME THAT’S — I’M SUPPOSED TO BE THIS CAT RIGHT???”

it went great!!!

above and beyond than what you expected

“thank you thank you dO YOU KNOW that you’re the best eVER :(((“

yoongi is so touched and awed over a pack of sTICKERS and it’s the little joys and you that make him the happiest

he’s so excited and pumped because he can’t pick on where to put them because they’re so precious and in the same time he doesn’t wanna use them because they’re tOO precious

yoongi’s about to kiss your cheek in the same time you wanna explain some of them and-

oh

he’s kissing the corner of your mouth

he only realizes when you squeak a little and he feels just so unexplainable with pure bliss that’s going through his body omg

and then yoongi pulls away to gauge your reaction because he was iNITIALLY gonna go for a cheek kiss but now that’s out of the bank because he wants more and-

oh god his cheeks are already on fire and tHIS WAS JUST A KISS TO THE CORNER OF YOUR MOUTH ACCIDENTALLY

it’s time to clear his throat and attempt to clear his mind“is uHhH sehun? 

sehun the trainer today?”

“yeaH it’s sehun…”

yoongi please say what i want you to say

pleathe

“i can — i cAN bail you out, if you want.,.. you uH ˢʰᶦᵗ do you wanna go karting with me?? like, right now??? it’s okay if you don’t wanna bUt i mean ᶠᵘᶜᵏ uhHhH-“

“yeah :)) i wanna go karting with you :))”

yoongi’s a mess and hE’S the nervous one now and he keeps scratching the back of his neck and he can’t maintain eye contact

he was about to explain that he’s not pressuring you wait dID YOU JUST SAY

“yes?? yeah?? oH that’s cool :D”

“do i need to get changed or-“

i mean you’re still in your workout leggings and a big black shirt jungkook has an aBUNDANCE of so u just stole one and tried out embroidery!!

it’s not the best aha

kinda ugly because it’s massive on you and u just take it off whenever the workout progresses to be harder

“no!! no!! don’t worry!! i’ll bring my backpack!! just take yourself, y/n, i’ll take care of you ʷᵃᶦᵗ ʷᵃᶦᵗ aHA!!! i’ll pack my shirts for you and water and like snacks omg i will be back in fIVE minutes!!!”

there’s kinda no protest since yoongi’s already dashing out of your hotel room and into his… and he’s leaving you alone and he swears that this will only take fIVE minutes

he’s a nervous wreck

but yOU are too

because wait

this is your first date!!

THIS COUNTS AS YOUR FIRST DATE

oh god you are gonna cOMBUST

it did take five minutes and perhaps even earlier!!

yoongi’s managed to even get a cap for you and sUNBLOCK

he has a driver hired and that’s kinda ironic because hE’S the driver but he doesn’t mind!!!

he’s sitting with you at the second row and you’ve never really properly been out the city ever since you got here because leisure trips aren’t exactly in your schedule

the buildings and the scenery are so cool and authentic and yoongi’s just staring at you as you stare out :(((

why are you so beautiful :(((

he’s envisioned taking you out for go-karting as your first date but nOT NOW

yoongi’s accidentally kissed you once on the corner of your mouth and he is now forever a changed man

his mind immediately went wOOP take y/n karting nOW

yoongi has a pinterest board with ideas for a first date

picnics are cute but there’s just so much aNTS and mosquitoes and flies would go to ur food when you turn away for a single second!!!

not to mention that he never checks the weather reports lmao

and grass with how soggy they could he eVEN if it didn’t rain???

disgusting

there’s always the option of dinner dates too

but sometimes they could be just SO boring and it’s a hit or miss whether you’d like the food because you don’t like overly fancy restaurants y’know

not to mention that they r overrated and the food isn’t that good to your taste bUT maybe that’s just you

he’s searched this place up a couple days ago and look!!! they have karts that have tWO seats on them

maybe he could rent out the place or pull out the “no it’s MIN YOONGI” card and he can drive you around and stuff :D

it’s postive to say that you’re vERY excited

“last one to cross the finish line buys the winner gifts for a whole week bYEEEE”

wait

that’s not-

tHAT’S NOT HOW THIS IS SUPPOSED TO GO

apparently this is how yOU want it to go

the idea of yoongi driving you around in go-karts didn’t cross your mind once

you thought that you were gonna race against him and gOD ARE YOU SO EXCITED

you work on cars not drive in cars

the closest you’ve ever went to karting is going on bumper cars when jungkook took you to the amusement park!!!

it’s not racing because all you and kook did was bump the other as mUCH as possible to the point that the attendant was :/// are they ok

you know how to drive!!!

not to flex or anything but u dO have a professional driver’s license aha :D

although that doesn’t mean shit if ur kinda being honest

do you know how to drift a car like what they do in fast and the furious?? probably yes

jungkook was “breaking in” his car and he took you to the dealership with him and the car just felt so sTIFF and then he saw an empty parking lot….

and well you didn’t exactly STOP him because it isn’t your car

how could you stop someone from doing something that you yourself wANT to do

can you drive as fast as yoongi?? possibly yes

will it be as clean and as easy as he makes it to be?? heck no

yoongi’s chasing after you because oh you are dEDICATED now to racing against him

you’re even scrambling to put your race suit on iN FRONT OF HIM and it makes him all flustered as he tries to keep up by turning and putting on his own

“now don’t go easy on me, okay???”

yoongi’s a bit confused because what did u just say

not to fuel his ego or anything but madame he is a race car driver and it runs in his blood and the skill is in his name

he loves u (although he hasn’t said that yet) but he doesn’t want to ruin all your hopes and dreams

“just race as what you normally do and i’ll do my oWN!!! :D”

o-okay

you’re fast!!!as fast as go-karts could go!!!

you even turned down yoongi’s offer of a ten-second head start because wHERE’S THE FUN IN THAT

you are as happy and as giddy as you could ever be

yoongi, on the other hand, is worried a ton

you’re still a bit cautious when it comes to curves and to turning and

yoongi’s heart physically stops whenever you go through them because now you’re starting to pick up the pace around them

you’re getting used to the curves as you go on and you’re starting to maintain speed aND go through curves smoothly

he’s happy that you’re happy but god he’s just tERRIFIED okay

the list of what could possibly go wrong is evading his mind and for god’s sake, he’s a rACE CAR DRIVER HIMSELF!!!!! with custom top-speed cars and not go-karts!!! and not once did this list cross his mind whenever he drives

it’s just now hitting him that his profession’s dangerous

but your profession tOO is dangerous!!!

you may not be the driver put you are a part of the pit stop crew that tends to the car the driver’s racing!!!!

fIRES!!! pneumatic torque guns that are sO DANGEROUS!!!! wheels!!!!! gas!!!!! the driver himself when he’s in a rush and could possibly injure people along the way!!!!!

yoongi’s going down on a spiral so harsh that he didn’t even notice that not only did you pass him, but you’re also farther away from him sIGNIFICANTLY and before he knows it, you finished first!!

:D

“yoongs yoongs did you see me dID YOU SEE ME?????? :D”

you jump up to yoongi the moment he gets out of his kart and he instantly catches you and puts his hands underneath your thighs to secure you

your arms are even around his neck and you are incredibly close to yoongi more than you could ever wrap your head around

“mhmmmm ‘course i did!!”

he mindlessly hums and he just takes the time to see you up close like this before you realize and yelp later on because ur flustered

god yoongi’s never cared for anyone this much before

he’s falling in so hard

and that’s not necessarily a bad thing, right?

the moment you stop talking and gushing is the moment you realize that yoongi’s been awfully quiet all throughout, making you look down and-

yoongi’s kissing you

for rEAL this time

god he is putty in your hands and he’s extremely mushy

your lips are sO soft that he feels like he could die a happy man

you don’t know if your getting this adrenaline from the rush you got from winning or if it’s just the desire to kiss him for so long that’s fueling you but either way

yoongi feels a little tug on his roots and that instinctively makes him kiss you a little deeper

his kisses taste so gOOD TOO

although you DO need to breathe every once in awhile

:D

yoongi has the biggest gummy smile on his face and his legs feel like giving out because he feels sO HAPPY

you don’t fight the grin on your face either because wow :D that was just wHoosh!!! the suspense built up to it was incomparable oh god the tENSION before

he doesn’t mind losing then :)

“one more? :D”

oh god u are rEALLY whipped for yoongi

and this puts the two of you on ANOTHER level okay

he’s gotten more affectionate and showy almost

jimin’s kinda concerned because sometimes he sees yoongi smiling out of the blue and he’s just…. what is this guy ON…..

jungkook’s so excited and happy for you!!!

he keeps pushing that this wouldn’t have happened if it isn’t for his overpriced stickers

he wants you to tell him EVERYTHING

“yeah?? and tHEN WHAT????”

he is a little jealous however because not all your time is spent on hanging out with him anymore

or how a particular someone would be joining your hangouts from time to time aka yoongi being a third wheel

…. or maybe jungkook’s the third wheel ….

lol impossible :)))))))

[ jeon jungkook continiously tries to deny the truth to himself as always ]

he could be nosy yes bUT he’s always curious

although

“so he’s finally your boyfriend?”

he makes sense most of the times

now that you think about it.,.,.

wait

oh

wAIT YOONGI ISN’T YOUR BOYFRIEND

you aren’t sure either if there’s a label already set?????

because as far as you know, kissing someone doesn’t automatically translate to gREAT UR MY PARTNER IN LIFE NOW

oh no

it’s all good!!!

all good!!!!

you could open this up to yoongi later!!!

oh wait he’s busy

tomorrow then!!!!

uH nope he’s busy

the other day then :))

yoongi keeps getting busy and busy as he explains to the point that you’re in the same floor but you aren’t even seeing each other

he isn’t lying to you, right??

this isn’t about the kiss, right?????

goddamn you jungkook :((

the gears in your head are turning because oh god what if yoongi’s realized that he doesn’t want to commit to you

or that this is as long as a free netflix trial and your time’s up and you need to gO

it also feels oddly sketchy too because yoongi’s only become suddenly busy and almost unreachable ever since the kiss

it is, in fact, about the kiss

god yoongi himself feels that he’s an asshole

he’s suddenly second-guessing his decisions

he’s went down the rabbit hole of thinking that mAYBE you deserve better than him

his name’s kinda big and some rumors follow him too, whether it’s inside or outside the track

yoongi has a track record of ex-girlfriends as what the media wittily dubs it aND HE WON’T DENY IT OK

he does have some ex-girlfriends and his lovelife isn’t talked about within the team because they just treat rumors as rumors and it’s yoongi’s life anyway

but what if news breaks out that you and him are dating

and his track record is brought up once again

aND NOT JUST THAT

because yoongi also feels like he isn’t worthy enough for you :((

he could be bland and too blunt at some points

as opposed to you :(( who’s sometimes too kind and always tries to understand situations and won’t also take shit from anyone

he’s not as spontaneous or charismatic as jungkook

he can’t be as spontaneous as jungkook who’s willing to go to a halloween party with him as mater and you as lightning mcqueen aND PERHAPS IN THE LITERAL COSTUME KIND OR SOMEHOW CLOSE TO IT

he’s not as avid in things that you like as much as jungkook is

he’s just yoongi :((

and he feels like the whole yoongi for y/n thing isn’t enough :((

you haven’t seen yoongi though

and since today’s for the practice sessions, this is the time that you’re sURELy gonna see him!!!

that’s the problem though

because seeing someone doesn’t exactly guarantee that they’re gonna pay attention to you

in other words: you think that yoongi might be avoiding you :((

he wasn’t alone as he normally was and just when you were about to approach him, that’s when he left to go get changed

you have no choice too since he goes straight to the track and that was it!!

you’re sneaking in to reply to jungkook who’s asking for updates because he’s as committed to this scenario as much as you were

this is the last practice session anyway

you just want to get this over with so you could go confront yoongi and fix whatever is this that’s happening :((

it doesn’t help, really

doesn’t help when the practice session is over and what yoongi does the first thing when he finishes is not go back to where the team is

or perhaps just hop over the box like he usually does

he goes to kim dahyun,,

kim dahyun

she’s a heiress?? a socialite?? maybe both???

she’s someone who’s known to be always in the front seat when it comes to events

she’d be placed courtside in basketball games and in tennis tournaments and by the side of the runway when it’s fashion week

no one for sure knows why

but her most recent appearances have been banked in these racing weekends and wherever she goes is where articles follow :((

she’s just something else :((

she’s pretty and she’s rich and she’s kim dahyun 

she’s wearing your team’s novelty shirt and she has it tied up in the front 

dahyun has her hair up in a bun and she has this ribbon that corresponded with your team colors wrapped around it

she has these perfect-looking gel nails!! gel nails!!! you could see the shine all the way from here when she’s flashed at the monitor and is in fact a couple of feet away from you!!

the jewelry too :((

gel nails and jewelry are things you’ve always wanted to try out but could barely wear due to the nature of your job

and although they’re just little things, it kinda drives you crazy because you can’t help but feel like you’re having a burnout with your profession

the fact that yoongi’s going to her for reasons unbeknownst to you is enough to make your stomach drop

even puts his hand at the sMALL of her back and-

oh

even does this lil cheek kiss and she does it back with him and they talk

they talk

min yoongi goes to talk to kim dahyun and greet her like that

when you can’t even get the bare minimum of even a glance from him

“aRE YOU SEEING THIS??”

jungkook texts you and it’s the only momentary relief you get because this way, your eyes aren’t focused on them and your heart briefly stops hurting

“yeah.”

you wanna go back to the hotel

you don’t even wanna look at yoongi

you retreat to the furthest area away and just sit there while all this fuss blows over and how there are even some cheers upon seeing yoongi and dahyun up on the monitor

cool

that’s cool

your cheeks feel wet and you’re just wordlessly setting up and putting back the things that were needed for this session

mingyu, the fellow pit crew member who’s aloft from you and the other ones for most of the times even noticed and he was just ???

“y/n, y’okay?”

you can’t even bring yourself to be in surprise that he spoke to you because you’re too busy being sad 

“dust :)) it’s just dust :))”

but it’s not.,., it’s not even remotely windy.,..,

jungkook crashes to your room later that afternoon and stayed with you until you fell asleep

you’re not exactly cHATTY when you feel your heart breaking and kook’s well-aware

just wordlessly puts on whatever’s trending on netflix and puts it up for background noise :((

orders room service and nudges you until you agree to eat 

even strokes your hair because he could see some tears pricking at the corner of your eyes and jungkook automatically presses you to his chest

damn yoongi ://

yoongi’s kinda missing the texts and the calls you’d usually bombard with him 

but this time his phone’s silent

he knows at the back of his mind that this may be about dahyun awhile ago but at the same time, he doesn’t wanna entertain the thought because it’s harmless,,,, right??

dahyun was a friend before she became his girlfriend and tHEN his ex

and now they’re friends again

that’s not exactly harmful isn’t it

yoongi’s eyes keep going back to check his phone every two minutes just to see if there’s a notification from you

and if he gets one? he won’t ignore it he sWEARS

just atleast give him a text

even a passive-aggressive one that just has a single period on it

and hE knows that all of this is building up because of him :((

he’s not quite ready to admit that to himself though

oh my god is this the end for you and yoongi???

you haven’t even started with proper labels aND you’re already over???

this isn’t exactly the high road you always try to go through

but yoongi’s just beyond confusing and angering at this point and is being really uNFAIR

so if he won’t be open no matter how much you try to coax him at his won pace and decides to be immature about it.,.,,,

well you’re gonna stop adjusting :D

today’s the third to the last race and just like any other, it’s heated

you support yoongi the driver but you’re not in the best terms with yoongi the loVER

not a bad start honestly

yoongi didn’t get pole position but instead the third and he was a more than bummed because usually, when he didn’t get pole-sitter, he’d lean on to you for comfort and you’re gonna soothe him throughout

but no that didn’t happen yesterday

jimin just sighed and patted him on the back and said “just do good tomorrow” and how is tHAT gonna be on par with how you comfort him

he’s through about 3/4 into the race

and gOD it’s going seamless

but some things are just piling up and it’s making him completely confused

hobi’s already passed him and at this stretch, he typically wouldn’t be able to because yoongi knows hoseok’s pattern

yoongi’s only had a pit stop once and that’s the strategy that gets him winning most times

but god something just feels odd

jimin comes at the right times as he speaks through the radio and yoongi couldn’t be any more lost

“yoongi you hAVE to box now”

and box equates to him having anOther pit stop when he usually wouldn’t because this isn’t it!!

this isn’t the strategy!!!!

“jimin iF i box now then that means-”

“yoongi!! listen to me!!! jung’s gonna pass ahead wHETHER you box or not. if you wanna save face and finish this race ranking atleast within top 10, box. right. now.”

fuck

his tires are thinning and normally he could sTILL go through the final stretch without another pit stop but fuck is jimin ordering him with so much ferocity

he has no other choice

and yoongi’s angry

he’s sTILL heated up because these circumstance have never happened before

then he finished 7th in this race

and that’s the lowEST he’s ever placed this season!!!

yoongi can’t exactly control his anger when it comes to situations like these and jimin’s very well-aware

he has faith in yoongi and his driving but tHESE technical reasons are what made him to go through this last-minute strategy

jimin’s crew chief and he stands by his decisions and his strategies

there’s no denying tho that he kNOWS yoongi’s gonna be heated

yoongi marches off the moment he finishes

and he’s looking for someone

anyone

you’re there by jimin’s side

and of cOURSE you were shocked by the sudden strategy and you just can’t help going to him to discuss it

you know too that yoongi’s gonna be mAD but after analyzing the situation with jimin when he explained and when you visualized, jimin did make the right call

before you know it though

yoongi’s already there

“Y/N!!!”

oh

this is the first time that yoongi’s speaking to you and you couldn’t be anymore shocked and confused at the same time

the two of you aren’t exactly alone,.,,

he’s had this sudden recollection of yoongi eating dinner with you in your hotel room and you kept asking him questions about racing and strategies and the philosophical aspect of it

and he delved into his strategies with jimin and retold them to you

you were in so much fondness too because he looks so focused and passionate when he was laying them out to you

“dID YOU TELL ABOUT THE STRATEGIES TO JUNGKOOK?”

what

wHAT????

yoongi isn’t level-headed right now and the story’s immediately flipped in his head of how this must have possibly went

jimin’s eyes are bulging at what’s unfolding, but even more so to the fact that you and yoongi aREN’T alone

and he’s here and the other crew members are here

and they can heAR YOONGI!!! loud and clear!!!

“yoongi wHAT are you talking about???”

“don’t play dumb!! you told them to jungkook, didn’t you???”

for a fact, you didn’t

you didn’t tell jungkook nor aNYONE else

what would you benefit from that??

what would yOONGI benefit from that??

“shut up!! you tOld about the strategies to jungkook and he told it to hoseok and nOW look at what happened!!! all of this, all of what i did, is gonna fall through just because you couldn’t keep your mouth shut!!”

jimin’s heart is dropping at this and he can’t imagine what you’re feeling right now

he knows to his heart that you wouldn’t do such a thing

or that all of this has to do with his decision and a series of coincidences that piled up for yoongi to mindlessly think that you’re the reason for what he’s pushing to be a leak

“yoongi, i would never-”

“dON’T TALK TO ME!!”

he’s burning

actually burning

so much so that he’s walking towards you and looking down on you

“you’re fired.”

wait

what the actual fuck

“yOU CAN’T DO THAT!”

“i can.”

jimin’s about to step in as he’s standing behind you and he’s already gripping at your arm

he needs to say something

and you know your standing with jimin isn’t the best but you’re just thinking about him

you know how he’s due for a promotion and a raise

and you know yoongi’s above and beyond gonna ruin his career if jimin dared to speak and atleast attempt to defend you and pin the blame on himself

“and i’m gonna get my father involved if i have to.”

that’s it

that’s the end of your career

you didn’t wait to get fired

knowing yoongi, he means what he says and so you didn’t waste a single second in packing up your bags and rounding up your documents

you already knew enough that yoongi’s dad have connections with the association and a single phone call could flip things over

so whether yoongi’s already made the call to his dad or not, you’re gonna leave either way

you’re making calls to your manager, the same one who came to your college and recruited you and jungkook, and had to explain as much as you can while pulling at all stops

said managers was saddened at the call and then she had to make that call to the ones in the upper positions so could aLSO explain as much as she can

honestly you don’t know either what’s gonna come out of this

either your name would be defamed wrongly, or nO one’s gonna notice at all and your sudden disappearance would have 99 versions and not one confirmed

they think it’s best to respect your decision of letting go and even if you’ve signed a contract, this “firing” is as good as official

also they think it’s best to relay the statement of you making an “indefinite leave” due to a “family emergency of grave importance” which translates to no this isn’t an indefinite leave but instead you’re leaving for good

it’s both a blessing and a curse that this happened far into the season

a blessing since there’s only two races left after this and that means less adjustments with the team dynamic and the news of your departure won’t be as focused on because yeah last two races

a curse since these last two races are critical and yoongi just couldn’t wait until the last one to blame you and then fire you

no worries though

there are always replacements

aka which just points that you’re despensable and it’s nOT helping your self-esteem

backups are there in case the event a pit crew member gets injured (or worse, incapacitated; and they’re familiar with the work and the dynamic so it would be just a seamless fit

and all of that got arranged in less than two hours :)) there was even a flight you managed to book within that time

you didn’t even get to say goodbye to jungkook :((

he had to know all of it by a short n simple goodbye and see you soon text you sent before boarding and by asking jimin what happened

he was cOMPLETELY bawling his eyes out because his best friend left him :(( and he counts on you so much and you help him stay sANE

he’s beyond angry at yoongi and didn’t even bother to bat an eye when he walked past him

jimin feels so guilty and sad

he was a shitty crew chief to you for the most part and after all that, you still went through this considering hIM and his job and his dIGNITY even if it means you lose all three things and you already did

jimin cried when jungkook’s lip started trembling and he lost it completey by then

yoongi’s lost and empty and oblivious to all of this

he figures that it’s better to let some hours pass so he could cool down and reflect

that’s his second mistake however

yoongi’s complacent

and three hours have passed and he knows that at this time you’re still awake so he walked over to your room and just rang the bell

oh

he’s rung it three times now and uSUALLY you wouldn’t even let it pass two when it’s yoongi by the door

that’s weird

yoongi’s about to pull out his phone to call you to open the door but before

he could even press at your name, the door already opens

… it’s a middle-aged man …

“yOU’RE NOT Y/N”

…

…

“wrong door, kid.”

but that’s your room

yoongi knows you’ve left the circuit earlier than everyone because of what happened

that much he knows

but not this

yoongi dials jungkook instead because for sure he’d know where you are but then another door opens and that’s jUNGKOOK!!! leaving jimin’s room that’s a couple of doors from your room

“yA. do-…”

jungkook literally just walks past him and into the elevator

what

what is going ON

then yoongi’s jogging to jimin’s door that’s closing then he manages to wedge into his foot before it closes

“where’s Y/N?”

little did yoongi know that the answer would make him regret even asking you don’t have the slightest clue on how could possibly bounce back from this

maybe take a break; a week perhaps

get a job that’s for sURE

ignore yoongi’s texts and calls

reply to jungkook whenever he contacts you as much as he could in free time that he gets

assure jimin that you’re okay and he has nothing to apologize for

be eternally grateful for your friends that have your back no matter what and help you stay afloat and even giving you a job

bless the kim line

jin, namjoon, and taehyung were your ultimate friends in college besides jungkook

they are the most awesome and sWEETEST friend group you’ve ever had in your life

you didn’t get to hang out with them as frequently like you did with jungkook since the three of them were in the business course and you and kook on the student athlete side

but that didn’t change the fact that you give are inseperable and wHOLESOME

you and jungkook ended up being crew members for a famous and multi-million team in formula racing but you’ve retired wAY too early lmao

the three of them

well

not to brag

but they’re the proud owners and the brawns and the brains of kim kradle

KIM KRADLE!!

it’s a one-stop shop for everything that automobiles could possibly need

but why kim kradle do you ask???

well first of all,,, jin, namjoon, and taehyun have the same family name which is Kim so write that down

kradle? aha well :D

so for babies, there’s cradles, right??

they serve kinda like havens, right??

wHERE was ultron from avengers: age of ultron made??? the cradle. although their shop’s vision and mission are wAY WAY different from ultron’s

and like why name it kim cradle

when you can name it kIM KRADLE

they’ve had calls when they were starting out asking if they were selling baby cradles and the answer is N-O

it’s now a huge successful shop that’s like an open warehouse type!!

basically, the kim kradle is divided into three major operations

general services to intensive repair of parts and basically what goes on internally!! jin is in charge and heads that sector!!

he could see your car for two seconds and go “hey man, did you ever ace your karate lessons? lmao you have a broken fan belt not a black belt”

carwashes and waxing and all that good stuff!! namjoon is a beast at thus and your car could be like from 1997 and he’d clean it so good that it would look like it’s from 2030

customization!! from leather seats to metallic foils to coating!! taehyung has an instagram dedicated to his finished works and ongoing ones and like wHAT?? he has half a million followers?? no big deal

kim kradle is on the massive side and is therefore separated to three floors

namjoon and his carwashes are at the basement in which you’d still get sunlight in because there are inclined pathways on the side that lead out to an outdoor waiting area

jin is on the 2nd floor and basically in the same ground level where the civilization is because his section’s more critical and it’s the obvious option

taehyung gets the 3rd floor, and one part’s covered and the other is like a car balcony so when he finishes?? you could see that sunlight hitting the custom coat he did on your car

either kim kradle is so good, the placement and marketing are perfect, or the owners are just sO attractive and unparalled as to why so many people avail their services and most go through all three levels

maybe the formula is all three of those variables

you came home without knowing a sINGLE thing and being alone in your apartment is appreciated but it gets eerie and so isolating

and you called namjoon late into the night because he always knows what to say and you ended up having more than what you hoped for

you just wanted to have some comfort and ease because also,, namjoon’s voice is really soothing and u miss hearing it

not oNLY did you get some peace of mind

you also got a job without even actively looking for it at the moment and you couldn’t be anymore fulfilled

namjoon said that you could come in at kim kradle anytime at your own pace and they’d still welcome you with open arms

also said that jin and tae miss you sO much and it’s a good thing that namjoon is the one you called because if it’s either from the other two, you wouldn’t be able to sleep and perhaps you’d get visitors to your apartment at 2 in the morning

and this is it!!!

for once, you don’t want to confront a problem to the core

you’re just gonna distract yourself and make your way around it aha :D

two days later??? you’re working in kim kradle now!!!

and you know what??

you eVEN get the overalls

the only three people in kim kradle that wear overalls are jin, namjoon, and taehyung themselves

and it’s to kinda highlight the fact that they’re the owners and the heads of their sections

the rest wear boiler-style like suits 

all their uniforms are cute

like sERIOUSLY

jin is in charge of the color and there are actually multiple ones!! a pale pink to a nice lavender and a dark navy blue!! the first two are kinda impractical because it’s impossible to not get dirty in this job but they ARE adorable and stylish though

namjoon pushed for this uniform and so he really searched and handpicked fabrics that won’t be tOO hot and in which u could actively move in them

but sometimes there are tasks in which involve the straps for the overalls sliding down so tHE next big thing????

namjoon sewing but actually it became tAEHYUNG’S job because he’s gonna poke himself with the needle multiple times before even getting to put a thread in

made a lil hook by the custom shirts down to where it draped by the shoulders and it could hook the straps so like wHATEVER the four of you do, the overalls won’t slip :D

innovation amirite :D

and then it was taehyung’s job to have kim embroidered in really cute cursive by the back and the initials of their first name in a lil formal font below it

and the first names are embroidered in the front!!! 

tae was the one who wrapped the overalls into a large box and you genuinely didn’t expect that you’d be even given one

and it’s just that you’ve been so much on eDGE lately and every little thing turns you emotional these days ever since that incident with yoongi

“is she,,, she’s,,, is y/n sobbing??”

taehyung sputters because oh my god did his gift wrapping throw you off?? jeez he kinda knew at the back of his head that the bright neon green with some balloons saying “happy birthday” even if it’s nOT your birthday looks REPULSIVE and he didn’t have any other gift wrapper left but he didn’t know that it would be too repulsive to make you cry :((

“did we do something??”

jin looks worried because oh god maybe it was the joke he did awhile ago about you suddenly working here now

although namjoon eased their worries and oH you’re hugging the three of them!!!

“i-it’s just that-...”

you were only supposed to thank them for the overalls and the opportunity bUT it took some turns and it ended up with you telling them the story and namjoon having to fill in some gaps when you get too pouty and too sad to explain

tHEY GET IT NOW

anyways

it’s very easy to be thrown in the spur of things at the moment because you’re just grasping at every opportunity to distract yourself!! :D coping mechanisms!!!!

you’re with jin in his section because that’s your work!! that is your work before you got fired and you just got to continue it

but this time with all the time in the world

not really but an hour is a lifetime for you and you’re just used to repairing things in mere seconds

in mere seconds and you have to train for it like almost every second of the day sO this is a nice change :D

“a wrench?? i’m gonna replace the tires using a wrench??”

jin laughs at that because you’re holding it in disgust as you stare down the car that just got brought in

they don’t have a flat tire or anything!! they just wanna get new tires that are as exaggerated as their very-embellished and exaggerated jeep with their specs :D

“they don’t teach you that in racing school????”

://

you know how to replace tires with a wrench and a jack of course

but it’s just hitting you now that oh god this is very alike and different at the same time with your past job!!!

“you dON’T have pneumatic guns?? yeah sure they mAY be expensive but like work would be done quicker and you’d go through more customers?? oH my god jin??? you know what, i’m gonna call jimin right now. let me get you some things!!!”

well then,,,

actually,,,

jin mAY have a pneumatic gun lying around but they don’t use it because a) it’s not as fast and as efficient as what yOU use in the track b) what for honestly,,, c) this is not formula racing and most people aren’t in a rush

but you know what

this is going good for you!!!

jin’s learning new things from u and the other way around and you’re not wallowing in sadness tHAT much anymore :D

and you do feel that kim kradle is doing so much good on you!! you’re constantly with jin but sometimes you spice it up an transfer from floor to floor :))

pressure-washing with namjoon is very therapeutic and having excessive knowledge now about how to properly give your car the shiniest wax ever in your lifetime??

it’s excessive knowledge you wouldn’t trade for the world

you even go work with taehyung sometimes!!! you help him plan out color schemes and pick out fabric with him and go measure dimensions and eVEN do 3D mock-ups

watching and aLSO being able to mix custom coats to go on cars is very satisfying ok

tae even gives you the password to the instagram account :))

he gets you to do the close-ups sometimes and eVEN tells you a thing or two on how he edits these clips to be as satsfying and pleasing as possible

today’s just a slow day

only three cars have come to the shop and to your floor in the past hour nothing from the three of them needed that much TLC

two of them just needed to get their tires’ air pressure checked and have them pumped to match

the other one was just towed here because it’s the nearest shop and just has a dead battery :((

you don’t know how you and jin could pass the time because there isn’t any tv in the area since sOMEONE (jin himself) got distracted too much by watching sherlock and he jUST wanted to know how sherlock pulled off operation lazarus!!!!

it clearly wasn’t his intention to keep pumping up the jack and almost have the whOLE car tip over because he had it up all the way

that was an accident :))

he didn’t even notice that so many of his boys were dashing for the side of the car to keep it from falling and when one of them called out his name, jin had the aUDACITY to shush him because there goes the climax!!!

wOOpS aha oh no what happened to the car :D

the next big thing that jin could do? ask you and catch up about all the technical stuff in formula racing so he could learn too ya know

“what happens if a wing gets dented or like dEFORMED?? how would that be fixed that quickly??”

“ooh!! good question!! actually-...”

that sound

you miss that sound :((

someone’s driving in your floor by the sounds of it and you don’t even need to turn your head to know that it must be a rEALLY cool car :((

it reminds you of the sounds you hear on the track and it’s one that you dearly miss

the growl of whatever car this is loud but like nOT obnoxious of pricks that just wanna show off in traffic and rev up their engine, y’know??

jin could only be so happy because fINALLY

another customer and another task to do to pass this day and it’s nOT a prius!!!!!!!

fucking finally

jin stands up immediately and you immediately follow him and this car’s getting attention from the other workers at the floor because whew

they all know to back off and go back to working on previous and existing projects because aH they see jin smiling giddily and almost jogging and you’re in tow from excitement

it’s a nice car!!!

a maserati granturismo in sleek black!!! jin’s only saw one of these come in the shop driveway but only for them to pULL out and it’s just because they needed to maneuver to go back to a u-turn

what a prick ://

he was excited that day and for wHAT??? someone to use their driveway just so they could reverse their car???? that’s just rude

the owner in mystery comes out and is aLREADY TALKING and- wait

isn’t that yoongi?

yOONGI?????

“hey man, could you check on my radiator real quick? the airconditioning’s a bit wack and i’m not entirely sure if it’s the radiator but i don’t wanna tweak it, ‘cause maybe it’s the compressor too. not sure. can you-“

that’s

oh my god that’s yOU

the season’s wrapped up like a week ago and the last races were tough so tough than he could’ve ever imagined and it was even harder without you

yoongi won the season

but he lost you though :((

he was so enraged at himself the moment jimin told him about the verdict you took and how you quit before he could fire you — for good yoongi has no one to blame but himself and god he’s just so mad at himself

even up to now actually

his pride was so enormous that he didn’t even tHINK that he might be the problem as to why he placed 7th in that race

and instead, he just needed someone, anyone, for him to blame and you’re the fIRST person he sees and he immediately takes his anger and frustration out on you

you would never do such things and he’s disgusted at himself for even tHINKING that you’d ever betray him like that

he was regretting every bit of his words and actions that he said and did out of blind spite

if he could punch himself he would GLADLY do that and knock himself out yoongi was both panicked and livid

had a hard time breathing too because oh gOd he just can’t stop thinking about you and the things he’s caused that are too late to bring back and reverse :((

he kept pleading to atleast follow you home even for just some hours and he’ll immediately go back to the hotel as if he never left

but he can’t do that and he hATES it

god this wouldn’t have happened if he wasn’t a big fucking aSSHOLE!!! throughout the whole week ever since you left the team, he was a gigantic mess

like he still is now

but he had dark circles under his eyes that were swollen from crying so much

his lips were set in a frown as a default

yoongi was doing well with the streak of not biting and picking at his fingernails and his cuticles but now tHAT’S broken alright

he’s tried reaching out to jungkook multiple times

he’s tried apologizing but he always gets a deadpanned response of how he isn’t the one he needs to apologize to

kook sees the sincerity of yoongi trying to apologize because he’s hurt you, his best friend, but that’s not the important issue here

you called jungkook unknowingly in the middle of his and yoongi’s conversation and the boy just almost jUMPS at jungkook to try and borrow his phone with his pleads and as much as his heart goes out (he still hATES yoongi ok), jungkook’s not gonna let him

he tries getting jimin to let him borrow his phone and call you and jimin won’t let him either because this is not his place and you’ve been through enough

the closest yoongi’s ever got to you??

jimin still feels so sorry and guilty to this day

and he’s conflicted and confused and a lil sad

but jimin did call you in front of yoongi on speaker :(((

and yoongi got to hear you answer with a chipped-out voice :(((

and he’s just so tempted to speak out loud but if he does that, then jimin will forever be mad at him too probably and he’s also promised that he’s gonna pretend he isn’t there

ask her if she already ate dinner

yoongi won’t stop typing in his notes tho and wave it frantically for jimin to ask you

and you’re responding truthfully because what’s jimin gonna do?? fLY to your home and cook you spaghetti?????

of course not

that’s what yoongi wants to do :(( if only he can :((

his win felt so empty and it just feels so dull without you here

also knowing that he’s drived out one of the only people that puts up with him and is always patient and is the reason to why he’s been so inspired lately

and one of these days

just one of these days, yoongi wants to drive to your apartment and camp out the door if he needs to just so he could redeem himself and earn forgiveness and try to mend what he’s broken

not today though

not today when the moment yoongi finally gathered the words and the courage to go to you, with the blessing of jungkook giving him his address but with a very sTRICT warning that scared the shit out of him.,.,.,

but also with his airconditioning broken and something just tells him that he needs to take it to a shop because it’s been awhile ever since he drove normal cars

and yoongi actually forgot the gravity of all this so he’s a bit nervous because maybe this is a more serious case with his car and it’s just the universe’s way of telling him to go to you tomorrow

or as soon as his car gets taken to the shop

maybe he needs to polish up some lines and try practicing them better from the heart

yoongi could go to jimin and have it fix it for him but like that’s tOO far of a drive and he just needs a quick fix

ooh

kim kradle!!! it’s the nearest shop to his place that has five stars on it

and he’s still a bit wary because his face and his name and win did land on the news and he’s been trending lately and like wHAT IF someone takes advantage of his car or scams him because they know who he is this car is his frequent and it holds a sentimental value to his heart ok

kim kradle is bigger than he’s pictured it in his mind

woah it actually looks cool and promising

christ it’s so hot inside his car god he needed to open up a little bit of his window but mosquitoes would creep in and tHEY’RE annoying and a real hazard to kill while you’re driving down the road

he wants to get this over with quickly

yoongi just needs to drive to your place and see you asap

“hey man, could you check on my radiator real quick? the airconditioning’s a bit wack and i’m not entirely sure if it’s the radiator but i don’t wanna tweak it, ‘cause maybe it’s the compressor too. not sure. can you-“

oh

that’s you

wAIT THAT IS YOU

“y/n?”

his hands are literally shaking right now oh my god

it’s been some twenty-seven days ever since he’s last saw you and here you aRE

here you are in a place he’s least expected to see you because he’s on the way to see you but actually yOU’RE HERE

“yoongi.”

you acknowledge him back and god you don’t know what to feel

jin immediately senses what’s happening and deep-down he is pANICKING alright

he’s been in contact with jungkook and in the back of their minds, they knew that yoongi won’t let this go without his ever-present persistence

and eventually like maybe yoongi’s gonna know that you work here and the last time that he checked, yoongi doesn’t even know kim kradle

bUT JIN DIDN’T KNOW THAT THIS TIME WOULD COME THIS SOON OK

he immediately steps in and insert himself in between you and yoongi that he’s trying to close the distance to you and that surprises yoongi completely

“airconditioning, right? keys please. i’ll check it out!!”

yoongi wastes no time in shoving the keys to jin’s hand and he couldn’t be anymore desperate to talk to you

he doesn’t wanna cross boundaries obviously even if jin’s already moved out of the way

you’re still glued to your spot trying to process the situation and your fight or flight response is not exactly working right now

is there a disbelief and yearning and standing in sadness and anger option in that fight or flight choice

“i haven’t seen you in so long.”

that’s what usually happens when you become an asshole yOONGI

god how are you supposed to react

“you too.”

there’s this awkward distance in between the two of you and it’s too deep to even get between 

yoongi suddenly forgets the words that’s been in his mind for the longest time,, just brewing and evolving and always changing as he just wants to fix the damage he’s done :((

he’s about to get closer but

“the cooling fan’s just clogged. it could be finished within like fifteen minutes man :D”

jin doesn’t exactly know what he’s doing but he ‘s dOING whatever this is ok

although that is factual

the cooling fan is just a bit dirty and there’s some debris in there that could be cleared quickly

but he just needs to do it extra carefully because this is a nice car ok

i mean he sTILL cares for cars in the same way even if not every car he gets in the shop is a maserati granturismo 

he’s just a lil bit nervous even thOUGH he’s an expert at this ok

“fIFTEEN MINUTES???”

yoongi’s freaking out and he’s gripping at his hair in panic because wHAT

THAT SHOULD TAKE AN HOUR

goddamn why does kim kradle have to be a five-star shop :((

“y-yeah.,, i can do it in ten if you’re in a hurry-”

“aha nO NO :D i’m not in a hurry at all!!! please, take your time!!”

oh god what does he do now

yoongi walks over to his car and that confuses both you and jin

because what

he has half of his body in the driver’s seat and it sEEMS that he’s fishing for something in his glovebox

it’s a lil swiss knife

bUT WHY

he kept it in the gloveboxes of his cars because seatbelts are not exactly fool-proof and you could be stuck in them and he’s scared of that

and also if he’s gotten a takeout of a burger and it’s too big and he’s driving with one hand so he’ll just whip out his lil swiss knife and cut haphazardly

“what’s your name, man??”

“jin!! kim seokjin :D you’re-”

wait

what the fuck is yoongi doing

oh 

did he just-

“also forgot to tell you!!! my tires are running flat and i tHINK they need to be changed!! so sorry man it just came up”

deadass

yoongi literally just slashed his four tires

jin’s sPUTTERING

and he’s looking back and forth to you and to yoongi and his car

“are you -- are you sEEING -- y/n tell me wait what the fuck iS YOONGI SLASHING HIS TIRES????”

whatever it takes

whatever to buy his time with you and so as much as he can

you’re quite taken aback because oh did yoongi just do that

jin has only known yoongi personally for like eight minutes and he could positively say that he is on aNOTHER level

yoongi’s approaching you again and it only hits you nOW

“have you eaten lunch already?”

your mouth is dry and you absolutely can’t look at yoongi because it just feels so unreal 

“no. hEy uh-...”

“no?? oh my gOD hold on just stay still, yeah? i’m gonna get lunch hOld on-”

yoongi’s immediately scarmbling for the exit

he has no concrete plan but he sure is hellbent in getting you lunch even though his car’s tires are slashed and he’s gonna be walking in an area he’s unfamiliar with

you really haven’t eaten lunch 

you were just about to say a half-assed reason of namjoon calling you just to exit this situation because you are nOT ready and yoongi’s already off before you could mutter it

jin’s gears are just on a frenzy

“oh so that’s min yoongi.,.,,. jusT slashed his own tires,.,,. that’s.... endearing.,.,,”

you’ve detached yourself from the situation and you couldn’t really stand seeing nor interacting with yoongi

you’ve cooped up yourself in jin’s office and the moment yoongi came back holding up take-out for boTH you and jin, his car’s already all-done

jin gives him a look that’s telling and yoongi gets it

“oh. that’s okay. just uh, just leave this for y/n, can you? there’s enough for the two of you. thanks, jin :))”

you need a moment

that one’s obvious

taehyung insisted that you come home early and you obliged because oh god you nEED a moment

you come into work the next day and sure enough, you’re all well-rested and this time they could ask about what happened yesterday

even hear jin’s point of view on how yoongi is just so wILD

taehyung is in alert and so in namjoon

they’re all ears ok

jin’s telling his story and tae’s nudging you discreetly and makes you look at a box!!!

a box he’s ordered online a couple days ago after he saw you breakdown and you’re looking in awe as you whisper because u don’t wanna disrupt jin

“gel nails???”

the same one you always wanted and it’s flashing back to when you saw yoongi talking to dahyun!!!

oh this is really happening???

“dO IT YOURSELF!!!”

taehyung’s grabbing your hand immediately as he opens the box and he’s sO pumped for this because he stayed up all night watching how to do gel nails yourself!!

he even bought a nice uv lamp for it!! he’s tHAT dedicated

this takes your mind off of yoongi for awhile

a car pulls up yet again and you’re getting the chills again bUt it just turned out to be jungkook

aND HOBI!!!

hobi finished second this season!!

they immediately flock to the lot of you and you’re not sure on who flocks who because everyone’s just genuinely happy to see each other

even the kim line meeting hobi for the first time is such a fun experience

jungkook immediately goes to you and he sEES taehyung doing something to your hand

he’s not sure what he’s doing

but he knows that he wants IN okay

he wants to these gel nails on your other hand

he doesn’t know shit on how to do them but he’s gonna learn along the way aND he is not backing down 

taehyung wasn’t aware that this is a competition now but apparently iT IS NOW :O

it’s not ensured that your two hands will look the exact same because you think they’re going for the what looks better competition and not let’S DO THIS IDENTICALLY because these are y/n’s hands y’know 

you’re about to fall asleep with how this is lowkey soothing

this is not the quickest manicure to do on anybody

especially if it’s someone’s first time and they’re really aIMING for it to be perfect

although it’s not easy because another car pulls up and you’re pANICKED that it might be yoongi 

oh nah it’s okay that’s not his car anyway!!!

you sometimes forget.... that yoongi’s a race car driver....

and there’s a possibility.... that he has multiple cars....

that’s yoongi alright

he steps down in a hurry and makes a beeline for you because he could immediately spot you!!! even in crowds!!!

you’re somehow ensured that yoongi’s gonna decide against going to you because you’re not alone

taehyung’s on your left and jungkook’s on your right and they’re not leaving your side until they finish their masterpieces for like another half hour

oH HE’S GOING FOR IT

“y/n, hI!!”

coming in strong but that’s ok

“jungkook :]”

he acknowledges kook and you’re not exactly up-to-date with how these two stand with each other 

but kook kinda just gives him a confused glance (jIN CALLED HIM LAST NIGHT) and nods back to yoongi

what

taehyung has his lips parted because what,,, why.,., 

yoongi’s about to open his mouth to talk to this guy that’s holding your hAND???

oh this is the part right

“i’m,,, kim taehyung.,.,.,”

“min yoongi. nice to meet you :))”

he sticks out his hand and tae blindly reaches for it and he doesn’t know wHY he shook it and he’s still confused up to to now

what is yoongi doing

wHAT IS HE DOING

you only realize now that yoongi has something in his hands and he’s looking dead straight to you and he doesn’t falter once

(he’s nervous on the inside trUST HIM)

“i know you’re not that comfy in seeing me and that’s tOTALLY okay!! i respect that!! it’s just uH i realized that uhm,.,., do you remember that time we were karting? and you won and we ki -- when you wON?? and you said that the winner gets one week of presents,,.,, and i just want to fulfill that.”

yoongi’s voice is wavering because oh shit this iS hard to swallow down

“even if i might be a little late.”

he wordlessly sets down a wrapped present by your feet, just in the middle of a sitting jungkook and taehyung who are listening all this time and have curious eyes on the neatly-wrapped present that’s been laid down

he leaves and stalks over to jin

“what happened now yoongi.,.,.,”

“my guess is that there are some rocks stuck in the wheel bearings. maybe even in the mags. four on the left, three on the right.”

....

hmmmm

“that’s nice, man. just a hunch??”

“yup :)) just a hunch :)) aLSO: can i have a stool?? i’m just gonna wait here, y’know :))”

yoongi’s not expecting anything from you

he doesn’t mind rejection or you ignoring him all throughout because he knows that he deserves it

he deserves it for sure

sometimes he sees you in the corner of his eye

or you helping out jin on fixing yoongi’s other car

or the other one

your own pace

your pace is what matters and yoongi isn’t gonna take any shortcut or undercut

this isn’t formula racing

this is yOU and him being patient until you feel like acknowledging him

of course he still apologizes

texts you even if you’re across the room

sees you open the text and you’d send him a look and you’d be giving him the slightest smile before you occupy yourself again

yoongi’s okay with that.

he keeps coming back

this is the third car and it’s nOT EVEN HIS ANYMORE

he’s just texting friends asking “yO do u need you car washed or fixed or something??? i’ll take it to the shop for you fREE OF CHARGE!!!”

he’s that invested in this and he doesn’t see himself giving up this is good for kim kradle of course but oh god this is aMUSING TOO throughout the week, yoongi hasn’t faltered either in continuing at giving you the gifts

the first one he’s given you?? a box full of trinkets he’s been collecting for every country that he’s visited ever since you gave him that caffeine pill!!

just random things he’s seen in malls or souvenir shops or airport boutiques that reminded him of you, all in a box with a single note

i miss you. - yoongi

you’re not gonna lie

you do miss yoongi too

but the things he’s done still make you wince when you’re thinking about it and even though he’s apologized in all ways but a face-to-face one

because you’re not that lax with him, the both of you know that this isn’t just a one and done thing

things take time and yoongi’s taking it at your pace and you’re grateful for it

warming up is always relative and so is forgiveness longing’s still there but it’s just a matter of suppressing it and yeah you dO miss yoongi

you’re lost without him too although you’re not gonna make that anymore obvious because that’s just devastating to think about you think he’s about to reach the end of his rope and it throws you in the whirlwind of oH

this is the sixth consecutive day that yoongi’s been coming to kim kradle yesterday was the first bIG interaction you’ve ever done with him

because since you don’t talk to him as much, he just takes his time as he waits for the services for the cars that he brings by making conversation with the guys

he’s gotten to know jin and joon and tae aND YEAH they like him but they do grill him separately though because they’re mad at what he’s done to you

but he’s also apologized to them and made promises that he’s gonna be keeping

jin doesn’t cook by the kitchen anymore because yoongi keeps bringing takeout or sometimes hE’S THE ONE WHO COOKS in his home and brings it to u guys

is it bad that he all bought you lunchboxes

is it bad that your lunchbox is the fanciest out of all of them and you have more portions and yours are always cut up like he did with the pork.,.,..

it’s not bad as lonG as you pretend to unsee the three kims stealing food from you and just go about to eating your food

but the big interaction did happen yesterday

and it was you suddenly calling out yoongi’s name as he’s sat by the car but he sTILL heard you and he swears he’s gonna cry

because oh god it’s been a long time ever since you said his name in that tone

“you’re not gonna eat with us?”

OH DAMN

he’s a mess

“uhm weLL do you want me too?? it’s oKAY uhm pls just-“

“don’t make me regret asking, yoongs.”

yOONGS

Y O O N G S

yoongi is instantly walking his ass to the little makeshift dining circle because oh my god YES

he doesn’t overstep tho and he just sits in between namjoon and

taehyung as he eats and every few minutes he sneaks a look at you and sometimes you look at him aND IT’S JUST LIKE the start all over again there’s the last piece of tteokbokki and everyone’s just feeling it out and looking at it

and yoongi

the bold man that he is

picks it up with his chopsticks aND

oh he’s putting it on your lunchbox

:))))))))

the night’s late and taehyung called yoongi to say that the car (it’s actually yoongi’s) he’s brought in for a ceramic coating and custom leather seats are all finished and wrapped up

and if he wants, he could go to the shop right now and pick it up since namjoon’s finishing up by the basement anyways and it would still be open then

and he does pick it up

he knows his way around the store

you could either take the stairs or the lift if you’re coming in into kim kradle without a car to go up and down the levels but he’s patient so he’ll just take the stairs

what he wasn’t expecting though

something that makes him cease his whistling as he goes up to the third floor to fetch his car

is you

rIGHT there

besides his car

and this is the only time that the both of you are alone and his throat is suddenly dry

you know this too though

you were intending to staying up late here just to finish on the car that’s been brought in two days ago with the broken engine that you think is worth salvaging

and you just wanted to see the view :((

reminisce to how you’ve been seeing yoongi in the flesh for six days straight and how you wanna tackle this conflict right to the head but you’re unsure to how :((

it doesn’t take a genius to know that yOONGI himself is right behind you

as you are aware too that this is his car that taehyung’s been working on thank u very much

“i want you to know that i’m not giving up on you.”

his words cut through the cold air and it surely gets your attention even if your back is still turned to him as you’re hunched over the balcony

“i’m running out of cars to bring, the one week of presents is ending, and

i’m so cLOSE to putting up a cot so i could sleep here.”

he’s serious about that one

seeing you just makes everything better no matter the circumstance it calms his heart and everything in him and he’s not gonna stop at nO matter what to try and make up for the things he’s done

“but you’re worth all this.”

yoongi dares to take a step closer and this time you could already see him by your peripheral vision

“you’re worth it,” and he needs a collective second to exhale the heaviness that’s sitting on his chest because oh gOd he was really an asshole huh

“i don’t know how long it’s gonna take, but i’m willing to wait.”

this is more nerve-wracking than any report card or championship results he’s been ever given and he’s not ashamed to admit that

“i love you, y’know?”

that’s the thing he’s been wanting to say for a long time he doesn’t know in the first place on wHY the hell was he scared because now that he says it to you, he feels like he’s never been more sure of anything in his life :(((

“good night, y/n.”

and the main purpose to why he’s here completely escapes his mind

he just misses you sO much that it’s so painful and all he could do is imagine scenarios and look back at all the pictures he’s taken of you half of it he’s sure that you never even noticed him taking

aND IT HITS YOU

something that hits you with the way that his car keys have the sticker of your initials on them

or the way when taehyung asked you out to help him with the leather interior for yoongi’s car and your scrunchie that you must’ve left is wrapped snugly on his handbrake

or how in the final checking for his car did you know that your playlist that you don’t even rEMEMBER mentioning to him is the one that’s on repeat in his radio

yoongi stops the moment that you call out for his name and god he’s closing his eyes because all the worst possible scenarios of you calling for him to stop this is enough to make him cry

you’ve also never been more sure of anything in your life

your hand just barely grips yoongi’s arm, staring up at him as you get to notice the features of his that you’ve always loved and missed all this time

yoongi’s hand’s open and so is your heart for all this

it’s the same keys that he’s went here for the first place, the ones with your intials on as he only realizes now that he’s done that

“drive me home.”

[thegayslovebaz]

You know what, looking at the differences between the characters in book one and two, the development is impeccable

Carry on Baz: Ah the chosen one, I can’t wait to kill him. Or even better, he kills me. I wish that were me, going on crazy adventures and saving the world. I‘ll never be happy, I’m so alone. Oh maybe I can have friends !? Oops I accidentally insulted them. Why is the love of my life so angry at me 😤 oh also I’m secretly gay and I hate my dad. Wish my mum was here to kill me herself. Fuck I’m so gay. Why do I have to be so gay. I’m a mess and my boyfriend is too.

Wayward Son Baz: I ONLY CARE ABOUT TWO PEOPLE. IF ANYONE HURTS THEM I WILL GO F E R A L. FUCK I hate America. I’m gay and I DO NOT CARE who knows it. Why won’t my boyfriend give me attention? WHY IS THE WORLD OUT TO GET ME. Friend hold my hand am worried. You’re annoying and that’s why your boyfriend dumped you but WE love you so it’s fine. Hello unskilled driver, wanna drive this car across America? PROTECT BOYFRIEND. Ah he loves me, I shall wander into a MILLION battles if it means I get a kiss. Fuck we’re going to jail.

Carry on Simon: I’m probably going to die trying to save the world, but I have a pretty girlfriend and plenty of food so it’s okay. AM SUPER POWERFUL! Also I HATE my roommate!! But I won’t rest until I see him again! Wait am I gay? Idk let’s kiss him again. HA I like to kiss this boy because I HATE him and he’s nicer to me afterwards☺️ oh no I killed my mentor. Holy shit I lived!? Time to move into an apartment with my best friend and lasting trauma.

Wayward Son Simon: I am the worst. I have no purpose and I’m terrible. I’m gonna break up with my boyfriend because I don’t want him to see how sad I am. WOAH I LOVE AMERICA. I LOVE CARS!! So much danger! I shall now pick fights to feel alive. I WILL FIGHT EVERYBODY AND THEN KISS MY BOYFRIEND. But I will ONLY kiss him after an adrenaline rush 😞 also nobody look at him!! STAB. hi new human friend. Oh wait no ur prisoner.

Carry On Penny: I’m the smartest and the best and I have my life figured out. All I want is my best friend to survive. Ooooh adventure.

Wayward Son Penny: I’m the smartest and the best but my boyfriend dumped me 😤 HOW DARE HE. Is it my fault? Oh no wait I am THAT bitch. My best friend is alive and I’ll make sure he’s happy! Oooooh adventure.

Carry On Agatha: I don’t wanna be just the girlfriend of the chosen one. I don’t even think I like my boyfriend. I don’t wanna be here. Magicians are crazy. I wanna be normal and have normal friends. I’m SICK of being dragged into danger. Damn I’m gonna die because of these idiots. Running awaaaaaayyyy

Wayward Son Agatha: ah, I’m free. Normal friends. No danger. Sun, uni, parties. I feel great. But shit idk how to fit into the normal world. I’m too magical. At least I have a friend who gets it. I wish I were gay. Being straight is a disease. Ew, men. Rich, disgusting men. Maybe I’ll date the richest one? He might be dragging me into a cult? This feels dangerous? Lmao might end up as a rich trophy wife. s o m e o n e p l e a s e h e l p m e

(I’m only half way through wayward son but I love these chaotic mages)

[surveys-at-your-service]

Survey #336

"get back, you’re never gonna leave him  /  get back, you’re always gonna please him”

What were your favorite things to draw when you were a lil kid? When I was a very little kid, idk. But once I got into meerkats... I drew them like crazy. Do you think there is something with or around you, like a spirit, angel, ghost or something else? How does this make you feel? No. Imagine you’re a stranger looking at yourself. What things would immediately catch your eye? Ugh, let's not. When did you feel the most confident in your life? Probably my senior year of high school. I was happy with Jason with plans for the future together, I was doing excellently in school... I thought I was really going to go somewhere. Do you think love is needed to have good sex? For some people, no. For me, loving one another is an absolute must. Do you think, or want to, die in the city you currently live in? Fuuuuuuuck no, I hate it here. What is the strangest thing you have ever encountered? Probably when I was otw home from my doctor appointment and we passed a random guy in drag walking on the side of the street... That guy is an icon. Favourite soft drink? It's really strawberry Sunkist, but I love it to a degree I don't even allow myself to drink it, because I will fucking destroy that shit so quick. So I tend to just say Mountain Dew Voltage is my fave. What do you like to put gravy on? I hate gravy, period. Have you ever gone canoeing/kayaking? No, but it sounds fun. What is one thing you know about your family history you’re proud of? Uhhhh idk. Who depends on you the most? My snake. Are you related to anyone famous or historical, if so who? Yes; William Clark and Queen Victoria or Queen Elizabeth, idr which. Would you ever donate a kidney to anyone, and who? Mom. She only has one kidney, so, y'know. She kinda needs at least one. I wouldn't even hesitate. What is the main quality you think makes a great parent? Unconditional love. What three things do you think of most of each day? My weight is #1. Every second of every day, it, as well as Jason, are somewhere towards the front of my mind. The final is financial and job-oriented stuff. Does/did your high school have pop machines? It did. Do you know anyone who’s won the lottery? No. Have you ever slept in a water bed? Yeah. How often do you use Flickr? I pretty much abandoned my account; nowadays I only occasional check my friend's profile who works at the Kalahari Meerkat Project because she uploads wonderful pictures of the 'kats as well as gives interesting info about them! Who is the last child that you took a photo with? Mom took a picture of me holding my youngest niece Emerson because it surprised everyone; I NEVER hold babies. She crawled over to me and reached up though, so of course I was going to pick her up. How often do you wear hats? Never. Would you ever get a nature tattoo? Sure! Idk what, but I'm rather sure I'll get at leaast one. Is anyone in your family sick at the moment? No. Where do your siblings work, if anywhere? My older sister is a mammographer, and my younger sis is a social worker. Where is your favorite place to buy groceries? Wal-Mart, I guess. Who do you generally talk to the most? My mom. Is anyone saved in your phone under a nickname? Mom is "Mama Bear," and then my siblings are "Little Sister" and "Big Sister." Whose birthday is coming up? My lil sister has her birthday in April. Have you ever ordered from an informercial? No. When, where, and why did a needle last pierce your skin? I needed to get blood drawn for some testing. It was drawn from my inner elbow, obviously at the doctor. Have you been to an escape room? Was it a success? I never have, but it'd be fun. I enjoy puzzles. How many followers do you have on Instagram? I don't feel like checking. What’s the most recent music video you watched? Thoughts? "Mutter" by Rammstein. I picked a screenshot from it to draw, so I rewatched it to select one. It's a beautiful video, but also strange, which Rammstein is great at. Have you ever recorded a cover of a song? No. What makeup products are your go-tos? If I wear makeup, the bare minimum is black eyeliner. Are you going to school this year? No. I gave college as many shots as I could handle both sanity-wise and with finances in mind. I do NOT want to even ATTEMPT to imagine the debt I have after going to three different colleges and dropping out each time. What is your favorite water activity? I enjoy just kinda swimming around aimlessly, relaxing. What are your favorite video games? Okay, I talk about SH2 and SotC enough on questions like this, so I'll mention some others I really enjoy as well: the Silent Hill franchise in general, Spyro games, The Last Guardian, both The Evil Withins, The Last of Us, some Resident Evil games (the 4th in particular), etc. etc. I just love video games. Do you like jello? I enjoy the flavor, but the texture makes me squirm. When was the last time you gave someone "the finger?" Probably while riding in the car with Mom when a dumb motherfucker swerved into our lane. Or something like that, idr the exact occasion. Have you ever held a snake? Yesssss, I want to hold all the snakes. ;_; Most unique place you’ve ever been to? Uh. I guess maybe the Whirligig Park/"Acid Park" nearby us? It's just this large expanse of unique architecture that are mostly, as you guessed it, extravagant whirligigs. You've got to see it if you come to the town. I have some pictures on my deviantART if you wanna see a few pieces. If you were a superhero, what color would your cape be? NO CAPES! Have you ever slept out on your porch all night? Oh fuck no. I'd feel way, way too unsafe. Do you like horror movies? Yeah! What’s your favorite Coke product? Just normal Coke. Watergun or water-balloon war? Watergun. I don't like being hit with stuff. Do you know anyone that’s afraid of elevators? I kind of am. Is there anything in your room that belongs to a boyfriend, or a friend of the opposite sex? I have three plushies from Jason, Tyler, and Girt. My Marilyn Manson poster is also from Juan. Who’s your favorite Beatle? I don't know; I was never a big fan, so I don't know any of them as people well at all. Have you ever texted an ex whilst drunk? How’d that go? I've never been drunk, but no, I've never texted an ex because I was drinking. Do you have to stand on your tip-toes to kiss your boyfriend? I don't have one. The only instance where I had to do that was with Girt. Tall motherfucker. Have you ever been tackle-hugged? Yes. Those are the best. Have you ever rejected someone’s kiss before? Girt once tried to make out with me and I noped the fuck outta that situation. It was so fucking awkward. Is your mood or the overall tone of your day often affected by the dreams you had the night before? My nightmares definitely can. Do you think that there are any positive aspects or outcomes of suffering from a mental illness? If you have a mental illness, do you think it has changed you for the better in any way? I definitely believe my mental illnesses forced me to mature faster and also instilled a great sense of empathy in me. And don't forget emotional endurance. What is your opinion on celebrity culture and celebrity worship? Have you ever been guilty of putting a celebrity on a pedestal? Do you think it’s somehow more acceptable/understandable to obsess over certain types of celebrities (musicians over YouTubers, say) than others? At what point do you think an obsession like that crosses the line? It's dangerous and can be very blinding. An outsider could say I put Mark on a pedestal, but I've always been very aware that he's not perfect and really just another human, I just happen to love him a lot for the human he is, haha. As time's passed, my vision of him has become healthier though (not to say it ever reached the "unhealthy" threshold); it's gotten easier for me to judge him and stuff like that. I think an obsession crosses the line when you put on rose-tinted glasses to look upon someone and entirely ignore their flaws, or if you try to invade their personal lives, ex. being one of those creeps that loiter outside their houses and stuff. If you were to pursue a career in photography and had the opportunity and means to photograph whatever you wanted, what would most like to photograph? Ah, livin' the dream. If I had to choice and would be paid well regardless of focus, I would absolutely travel and photograph the local nature/wildlife. Is there a certain type of clothing (outerwear, activewear, loungewear, etc.) that you enjoy shopping for more than others? Shirts, 100%. Are you ever afraid to post your ideas, artwork, photography, etc. online for fear that they will get stolen or not credited? When it comes to OCs, yes, given that things have been stolen from me before. Photography doesn't worry me much because I don't think I'm good enough for someone to possibly want to steal it (and besides, I use a watermark), and I do the same for drawings. It's the unique characters I make I worry about being stolen if I share them. When is the last time you did something sexual? A few years back. Who is the last person you showered with, if anyone? I haven't showered with someone since I was a little kid and my younger sister and I would to conserve water. What do you think when you see roadkill on the side of the road? It really makes me genuinely sad, and I always wonder if it could have been avoided if the driver was more alert, slower, and thinking about more than the damage it could cause to their car... I enjoy photographing roadkill, brutal as it may be, out of respect for them and the desire to make their individual stories known and just kind of like, raise awareness of it. Too many people are just annoyed by hitting an animal versus more concerned. "Stupid deer," stuff like that. I sometimes worry that doing so can be interpreted as disrespect, to photograph and publish pictures of their corpses online, but I sure hope not. It's the least of my intentions. I just want people to see and care. Have you ever had an ex that just didn’t understand that it was over? Biiiitch I was that ex, 120%. But besides my situation with Jason, this was how Tyler was. I had to tell him about five thousand times to stop texting me. Are your fingernails currently short or long? They're always pretty short. Would you rather have big or small dogs? I like medium-sized dogs most. I'd have to pick large dogs between the two, though. What is your favorite sports drink? I'm not a fan of sports drinks. What was the last compliment you gave a guy? Yesterday, a guy in PHP shared two poems he wrote while hospitalized, and they were wonderful, so full of passion and emotion. I sure as hell told him they were amazing. He's going for his Master's for poetry, so he knows what he's doing for real. Does your jaw ever crack, pop, or lock? It's popped on very, very few occasions. Have you ever thought of how you would give your kids “the talk”? I don't want kids, so no, I've never thought of this. I certainly wouldn't wait for sex ed in school, though. I feel like it's a bit late. I feel children need to know what it's about at a younger age with how disgusting some people are... I want them to be informed on what consent and molestation are so they know to let Mama know so I can punch someone's face into a whole new galaxy if they're ever violated. Do you ever feel like you’re missing out on something? Oh, always. Do you ever write/draw on windows that are fogged up? I did as a kid, sure. Not so much now. If you were married, and your spouse’s parents became ill, would you let them move into your home? If they were truly sick enough to need assistance but not actual hospitalization, yes. I'd want my spouse to do the same for me. Have you screamed in a pillow before? Yyyyep. What do you like more, acoustic or electric? Electric. Did you actually have a cookie jar? We have a Santa one, though I don't even know if we ever used it versus just having it as a decoration. What’s worse, having someone mad or disappointed in you? Disappointed. What do you bite on more, your tongue, lip, or nails? Bottom lip. Do you think that knowing when and how you’re going to die would ruin your life? "Ruin" it seems a bit extreme, but I definitely wouldn't like it. Do you have a favorite bromance? From TV or a movie. Not really, if we're only talking those two options. Do you find flea markets and thrift stores enjoyable? Yeah, you really can find the coolest shit for great prices. What color is your wallet? Mostly red and white; it's a Harley Quinn design. Have you ever been somebody's photography subject? No. Nicki Minaj fan? I believe she's a very talented rapper, but I don't enjoy her actual music. I just don't like rap. Have you ever seen the Niagara Falls? No, I wish tho.

[tillmays]

the Late shift

Here it is as promised. To the ones that asked to read it first thanks. Thank you for your words. This is one of so many things that “happens” idk if you get it. this is different to the things you all read don't take it so harsh. This was the first thing I wrote. As I have said before I see me in Riley, I wasn't feeling good when I wrote it. this helped e to get something off my chest. I didn't came here to ruin the character for anyone ok. and I added something to make it fit in the story line. 1 day later but here it is.

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*Riley checks phone* sitting in the driver's seat looking through the window. She was a little distracted. she checks her phone again. “do u not feel me thinking about u??? Text me” she said to herself. “Waiting for something Miss Davis” Riley snapped out of her head and said “oh no I’m just, eh… Nothing. It’s late that’s all. You said this was going to be quick” she turned her head to look out of the window again. “Things take time. We need to have patience” he said to her while being alert too. “Well yeah but I will have more patience if I knew what I’m doing here” she said sarcastically. He put his hand on his chin. “You haven’t told me what I’m here for,” she said while looking at her phone again. “You know that after this you have to get rid of that phone”. Riley looked at him while her sight eye was getting lost in the distance knowing it was time to let go. “I know,” she said. James Macgyver said to her “so you remember what you have to do” “no you haven’t told me anything ” “oh. My apologies then, I guess I have been a little distracted too. You have to hack his phone. This man has information about an undercover team. A team that is close to the people you’re going to be spending next few months. So…” “Wait what?” she said confused. “Oh you don’t know? guess director Webber forgot to tell you the details. You get the information from the phone, after that you’re free to leave”.

 Flashback: to 2 days ago 

 Before leaving for the mission with the team. That morning, Riley received a message from oversight. He needed her for a special work. James Macgyver called her, He knew her abilities. He was impressed with her work and he knew she was the indicated for the job. “Miss Davis I called you because I know you are the right one for it. the right one for what? she asked. In 2 days I will call you no matter the time you have to be ready. Bring your equipment you’re going to need it” he said in an excited way. “What is it about?” she asked while raising her eyebrow. “The only  information you need to know right now, it’s that you have to be ready ok”. “Ok sir, I will be ready then” Mac was walking down the hall when he saw them talking. Mac stepped back, so they wouldn’t see him coming. “Be careful. And watch Mac for me”. He said to her smiling while he patted down on her shoulder. “Don’t even doubt it sir” she smiled while he walked away, and she entered the war room.

Mac saw them smiling. His mind was running like crazy trying to think what the hell was going on. “I’m just overthinking. maybe they ran into each other. He was saying hi, Wait he doesn’t do that he’s not a normal person he doesn’t go around talking to people. Damn I’m doing it again I need to stop. shit. How do I escape from my mind” he said to himself while the curiosity was eating him inside.

 End of flashback

                          ——————————————————–

 “Well are you ready for your new adventure as an undercover agent?” J.Macgyver asked “Yeah, little bit. I mean it’s different. I’m entering a new field, I know it’s not going to be like before. The traveling and the fun with the team. And having this rush of adrenaline every 5 minutes with Mac” James made a little smirk. “but it's work. I will get there, eventually.. I will be ready when I’m ready”. “Yeah I know in this job you don’t get to actually see the places you go. In all of these years, I have seen what the man is capable of. *He was reflecting on all the people he has encountered and the things they can do to hurt others. “And I have seen some things in this world that I swear...”. He looked through the windshield without ending the sentence. Riley was very reflective. and he continued saying “But like you say, it’s work. but it tends to consume you.” Riley looked at him. He was venting to her but in an unconscious way. “But isn’t that funny about life” what?” she asked. He looked at her trying to get his composure back “the time you feel lonely is the time you most need to be by yourself. Life’s cruelest irony, don't you think” he said to her. “here's another one, when we fall in love with the most unexpected person at the most unexpected time”. “Uh that's a good one” she said sarcastically towards herself. They started saying jokes at things that were related to how they were feeling. “Or when you’re holding onto something that is not even there,” she continued and laughed. time passed when  James Macgyver spotted on the street the man they were waiting for. “ there it is” Riley checked the man crossing the street entering this bar by where they were waiting. “the man of the hour” Riley said while grabbing her phone and her backpack. “I'll be back in a flash” he nodded to her. He had a laptop where he could see the place through the security cameras that Riley hacked earlier. Riley entered the place. Saw where the man was sitting. He was at the bar where he ordered a drink. He was close to her by four chairs in between them. Riley covered the phone with her hair. The job is done at the same moment she sent it to oversight. She walked out and went back to the car. She got in and started the car. “Alright let’s go” “done? Are you sure?” “Yeah already sent it to you” she smiled as they were leaving the place he was more than impressed. 20 minutes driving they were at a stop sign. Riley saw this bar and she  felt like going. “Hey we are done here right?” she asked “yes we certainly are. Why?” “Well I will drop off here” she took off the seat belt and got out of the car. “Wait where are you going” “oh I’m just going to that bar” James looked around. “are you sure” he didn’t feel right leaving her there. “Yeah it’s going to be quick” “well, have a good night and good luck” she thanked him and walked into the bar she stayed at a bit. It was time to catch her plane. Riley was walking down the street when she felt like someone was following her, “ok calm down” said to herself. The system on her phone started to give Riley a notification. She tried to grab the phone from the back pocket of her jeans.  when someone grabbed her from behind and dragged her in the back alley of the bar. Riley started to punch him, but he grabbed her arms. He had her pressed against the wall. Riley couldn’t fight back. She didn’t know why her body stopped responding. It gave her chills. She felt her body go cold. She did not understand what was happening. Riley felt a lump in her throat, she could not scream, the tears running down her cheeks. He whispered things in her ear. clung her hands to the wall in desperation trying to get away. A shivering went down her spine. Riley’s cell phone kept ringing, the only thing that came out of her mouth was “stop”. He wasn’t listening; he punched her on the ribs multiple times. It hurted like hell  because her wound from her last mission hasn't completely healed. *body hits the ground* Riley heard how a piece of wood fell to the ground. She was still clinging to the wall. She looked askance at the floor and saw the man lying on the ground unconscious.

 -Riley?!?! You ok?! Riley kept facing the wall, she was still scared. -Riley…. She turned around and saw Billy Colton. Confused with tears in her eyes she was more than relieved to see him. He was the last person she would expect to see at that moment. Riley felt out of her body. She started to give little steps toward Billy. He walked with his arms open to grab her and take her out of there. He didn’t say a word. They walked for an hour. until Riley asked him. “How did you find me?” -what?. “How did you know I was here?” -Well, I know this is a little bit fucked up but when we were together I linked our systems, so I would know where you were. And when we broke up, I forgot to delete it. so.. here we are. “Thank you I guess...” question, how did a trained agent not fight back that man back there? I don't know Billy. I got frozen. my mind wasn't there you know if you didn't get there in time it could be another situation right now” she said. don't worry about it. hey let me walk you to your place.Billy offered. Riley saw a public phone. “Hey uh i need to make a call first” She walked to the phone. - ok

*phone rings* 

-Hello? “Oh hey mom” Riley's voice started to break. -honey what wrong? “Nothing i  wanted to talk” -Riley are you ok? “Yeah I'm fine….i just feel lost ”. Riley was crying in silence. Her tears falling from her face didn’t make a noise. She didn’t want to worry her mom. “You know mom there's something I wanted to say and I remembered that-” - oh you always thinkin in the past. You remember too much. Why hold onto all that? “Well where can I put it down?” she said sarcastically  annoyed. -Riley you need to forgive the woman you once were and look forward to the one you’re becoming. “Yeah well how easy is that mom?” - oh well how you are going to forget and forgive if you can’t forgive your own mother? You’re not going to say something? you know saying nothing sometimes says the most. “Hey mom since this is about you now i'm gonna go ok”. She hung up and saw Billy waiting for her. “Hey uh I have to go.” Riley, tired and angry, was trying to get rid of him. -what, no I will walk you home. I can’t leave you alone. Billy was looking for a way to stick with her a little longer, even if it was just one night. “It’s ok.  I don’t want to .. Talk right now” -hey forget it. don’t worry, let's walk. He said. there was a little silence and he tried to start small talk. So how did that call go? he looked at her,  Riley laughed and said “Hey we say not talking” -ok ok. Billy smiled at her and looked at her just like before. the same look when they were together  two old lovers making company for the other like if they had no past. A meaningless conversation. A Familiar scenery.

[beecherdrysdale]

Hehe, we will be screaming the entire time!!. Yesss make those girls jealous, as you should. Like you got an entire hockey team + me and kesh to come. What a flex. A perk is that we are all good looking ;)). You’d look up to the stands and just see me and Ryan bumping each other “for fucks sake, Ryan” hehe sorry I just say that a lot. They’d be embarrassed to hold each other but still do bc they’re nervous. Yaa Quinner is having a tough time. I have a very strong hold. Oo ya dyl does seem like that, he would just be hiding behind me or something and whispering “how’s she doing?” “ is she winning”

Yes consider this as a gift from me and Ryan for the day. No promises that we won’t do it after the meet tho. It’ll be hard but we don’t wanna annoy you lol. Dylan and Jamie better step tf up. Honestly chipotle is just amazing, like I don’t really consider it fast food cuz it’s kinda healthy. Wbu? Applesauce is yummy, I never had the ones from the packet tho. Do you eat energy bars, like cliff bars? Going to Costco for ad are is a great idea lol . Not a lot of money spent. I always lose my mom in there, and it takes me forever to find her because she never answers my calls.

Ok I am living for this jump hug, it would be so cinematic. Then we will be trampled by the boys, and we will start chanting your name hehe. This would be such a flex.

Hehe okkk Brigid I see you . No team Canada jersey for you. I would probably never wear a USA jersey lol. Idk I mean cactus club is really good and Dylan Holloway knows about it so we can take you there. Ummm if thinking only about canadian restaurants there is this breakfast/brunch restaurant named Cora which is so good. They cut up a bunch of fruit with your meal and I love it:) their smoothies are real good as well.

Hahah okk I’ll look for you and cry because I got you all there :))) I’ll make all the girls jealous as well!. Ya my warmups are long but I can do them around you lol!. Somebody gotta make sure that I don’t over analyze and get to nervous. Like when I took my drivers test, full on shaking before I got into the car. But I’m better now lol. Lmaoo don’t worry about swearing my dad swears when I play. So y’all are good . Yaaa I would just hit a ball at you guys at the end of my match and hit Ryan in the face. Jamie gotta calm you down. I would probably be dying of laughter as well and Ryan would try to jump from the stands to go get payback. Awww Quinner is worried, I’ll give him a real good kiss after lol. Idk how nervous do you get if you watch sports- are you like me haha? Or different? Hmmm who else would be nervous lol?.

Ooo yessss dyl is holding onto your thighs.....😏.

I mean I would go on Quinners shoulders, he has broadish shoulders, but Braden has more broad shoulders. But also gotta make quinner jealous sometimes 😏. Okk Brigid, I’m going on your shoulder since you have great shoulders and #wedontneednoman. Ik i wanted to go so badly, he saw everybody 😭 Yaaa kesh, you and I have to dress cute! Like cute hair, cute clothes etc. Idk I don’t really wear makeup so I probably won’t wear any. Wbu? At Coachella you gotta dress nice but weather appropriate hehe. The boys would look hot tho .

ok so yet another long post lol

lmao yes you guys better be screaming the entire time. and making all the other girls on my team jealous lol. they’d be like “damn wags why didn’t you tell us you have hot friends” lmao. and then you guys would distract all the kids from the other teams for me lol. hehe and then i just look up into the stands to see you and ryan pushing each other around and i’m just like not again. and they’re all super embarrassed to be holding hands but they do it anyways bc they’re usually the ones playing the sport, not watching so they’re super nervous. and quinner’s hand is just dead, but you could make it up to him later😏 lol. and then dyl refuses to watch bc he’s too scared but he’s asking you for updates every 5 seconds and you’re just like “the race is right in front of you, just watch it” and he’s like “no i can’t” and then you can chirp him lmao

hehe ty for leaving me alone for once at least for during the meet. ig all bets are off after tho lmao. yes dyl and jamie you better be stepping up if you’re at one of my meets. yesss chipotle is amazing, ig it’s fast food bc it’s fast to get it yk, but i get what you’re saying, like it’s healthy so it doesn’t really count. also yes applesauce is amazing, the squeezy applesauce slaps. literally it tastes better when you eat it out of the pouch even tho it makes you feel like a 5 year old lmao. i don’t really eat cliff bars during meets bc they kind of make me feel sick while i’m swimming, but i’ll sometimes eat them after esp if i do a long race to replenish nutrients and stuff yk? hehe yes i literally want to go on a costco date so bad, and it would be so cheap too lol. haha same i lose my mom in there too lol, bc i go off and look for all of the samples and then i can’t find her

 hehe yes our jump hug would be amazing, and by the end i would somehow end up by a pile of hockey guys lmao. and then i would be flexing on all the other girls lmao. but if anything happens to my tech suit, i will kill each and every one of you bc that shit’s expensive

yeahhh sorry, no canada jersey for me, can’t go against team usa lmao. it’s just hard when you want to support your boys and your country at the same time lol. ooooh yes, i want to go to cactus club and cora now. i love fruit and smoothies, so i’m sure it would be amazing

yesss we’ll all be there to support you, and you’ll make all the other girls jealous lol. haha if you see us and start crying everyone will just be so confused, like what’s wrong with her lmao. yes you have to do your warmups by us so kesh and i can distract you so you aren’t thinking too much about your matches. haha that’s kind of funny about your driver’s test, is it weird that i’m not even a little nervous for mine? anyways, yes we’ll all just be screaming and swearing in the stands, and then at the end you’ll hit us a ball but it will end up hitting ryan in the face. and i’ll just be dying of laughter and then one of two things will happen, either i’ll start crying laughing or i’ll start choking from laughing too hard. and then jamie’s got to get me some water or something to calm me down. meanwhile, you’re dying laughing down on the court and ryan’s just trying to find a way down so he can get payback lmao. and quinner’s so nervous while you’re playing, but then he’s super happy once you win, and ofc you kiss him at the end, after our epic jump hug ofc. lol no i don’t really get nervous watching sports i just get annoyed when people aren’t doing how i want them too and i usually end up screaming at the tv lmao. idk who else would be nervous, i mostly see quinner lol

hehe me sitting on dyl’s shoulders and him holding me on by my thighs 😏 jamie might get a little jealous lol. and then you go on braden’s shoulders bc he offered, but then quinner gets superrrr jealous and you’re just casually sitting there lmao. and then you see quinner getting super annoyed and feel bad so then you switch to my shoulders instead. haha yes the three of us need to dress cute, but i’m not wearing makeup bc i hate it. literally i think the last time i wore it was school pictures last year, i refused to wear it this year lol. and we’ll have to put in sm effort but we’ll look cute, and then the guys will be looking hot without even trying which is not fair but whatever

so yeah, i love all of this 💗 it’s amazing

[pappydaddy]

Ophelia (s.h.)

A/N: This is the first part (yay!) out of the I Wanna Be Yours series. If you notice, there is a theme to this: songs!! Pretty much this entire series is inspired by songs and music so I put together a playlist on Spotify (if you have Apple music, feel free to make a playlist on that but please inform me first!) and I might make one on youtube but idk. 

  Each part is going to have the songs I listened to while writing it, inspired it, or fit with the contents of the part. Please, if you’re going to listen to the playlist, don’t put it on shuffle while you read it because I worked really hard to get the order right!! I hope you guys enjoy this!! (Also enjoy my weird, wide range of music😂).

PLEASE TAKE A SECOND TO LOOK AT MY PINNED POST AND SIGN THE PETITION!!

Pairing: Steve Harrington x Fem!OC(named)

Warnings: Angst, violence in some parts, arguments, body image issues, feeling belittled/feeling weak, SPOILERS!!(for all seasons).

Fandom: Stranger Things 

I Wanna Be Yours Playlist (Spotify)

This parts songs: 

This parts songs: I Wanna Hold Your Hand - The Beatles | Ophelia - Lumineers | Poison - Rita Ora | Less I Know The Better - Tame Impala | Nothing's Gonna Hurt You Baby - Cigarettes After Sex

IF YOU WANT TO BE ADDED TO THE TAG LIST FOR THIS SERIES (TRYING THEM OUT) PLEASE DM ME OR JUST ASK!!

masterlist | taglist | wips | navigation

- not my gif -

 Sitting in the driver's seat of her car, she listened to her brother ramble on and on about only two subjects: this new girlfriend named Suzie and Steve Harrington. Every time he brought the ramblings back to his fluffy-haired older friend, she found her mind wandering. Steve Harrington had proven himself to be much more different than she had first perceived. When she had moved to Hawkins, she had thought him to be an egotistical asshole who only cared about a title and he had proven her right through his actions until one day when he suddenly just wasn’t. Suddenly, Steve was the boy who was dating Nancy Wheeler and hanging around with Jonathan Byers. He no longer was ‘King Steve’ (the king title being passed to Billy Hargrove), he no longer had Tommy H. and Carol as his two annoying shadows. Ophelia wasn’t quite sure what happened between the three, but it must have been pretty big. 

  Despite the change in his ranking within the high school, she still didn’t fully trust him. His past actions went against everything she believed in. She believed in kindness and loyalty, not getting into fist-fights, bullying and ignoring people just because you perceive yourself as better than them. Maybe that’s why they never seemed to become friends for the majority of the time he went to high school.

  “Ophelia,” Her brother’s call of her name snapped her from her thoughts of her history with her brother’s friend. “Are you even listening to me?” He asked her when she glanced at him quickly. She pressed on the brake of her car, getting ready to turn into the bustling mall parking lot. 

  “Yes, of course I’m listening!” She lied, looking back in front of her. 

  “Really? Then why haven’t you been answering me when I’ve asked how Steve’s been doing?” Dustin perked an eyebrow at his older sister. Sure, her and Steve Harrington were not friends through most of Steve’s high school career, but that had changed when Dustin had brought them together to help capture Dart, leading to Ophelia’s second go around with the Upside down. He had changed once again. With Nancy Wheeler dumping in at Tina’s Halloween party and then running off with Jonathan, she had seen Steve once again change his spots. After fighting the Upside Down alongside him, their friendship blossomed. 

  “Because, we’re about to see him so you can actually ask him for yourself, Dipwad.” She commented, trying to get Dustin off her case. All she needed was for him to know just how she felt about the dopey, hair-obsessed boy. Sure, their sudden and shocking friendship was not the last of Steve’s changing. Through their growing friendship, she had watched as he changed into the dorky, clumsy, parent of six. Sure, he lost his charm, but somehow, his lack of charm captured Ophelia’s heart. Maybe it was finally seeing the true Steve Harrington that made her heart skip a beat every time she so much as heard his name. Or maybe it was the way he developed a new charm that the girls of Hawkins have yet to fall for, but no matter how it happened, she definitely fell head over heels for him.  

  “I don’t want him to know I’m worried about him.” Dustin exclaimed, his eyes nearly bugging out of his head as he gripped his hat covered curls in frustration. Ophelia gave him a look as she pulled into a parking spot, turning the car off swiftly. 

  “He’s fine, Dusty,” She reassured him, pulling the keys from the ignition. “Why are you so worried about him anyway?” She posed the question. Sure, he had been a little bummed out since he hadn’t gotten into any schools he applied for, and he was a little upset about having to get a crappy part-time job, but it wasn’t anything to make Ophelia too concerned. Of course, it hurt her a little hearing him talking about himself the way he does, but what hurts her the most was the little game him and Robin were playing. Seeing him shamelessly (and horribly) flirting with girl after girl who ventured into Scoops Ahoy was poison to her heart. Each wink he gave the girls was like a needle injecting the next dose right into her valves, wanting to kill the beating organ. 

  “Between you and me, I think he’s lost his mojo a little, Leah,” Dustin whispered to her over the hood of her car as they climbed out. She gave him a look that told him that he was crazy, but he just challenged it with a knowing look. “He hasn’t had a date since Nancy left him and he doesn’t go to parties. He’s lost his confidence and, in turn, lost his mojo.” Dustin explained. 

  “He didn’t lose his mojo, Dustin. He’s changed, he’s grown and he’s trying to figure himself out and he hasn’t tried to get a date since Nancy left him.” She pointed out, trying to cease her brother’s worries. Sure, he’s flirted, but he hasn’t actually put himself out there. Ophelia knows the difference between flirting and actually wanting a relationship all too well. Her trusting nature had made her fall privy to people just wanting attention or sex, but on the flipside, her trusting nature had let her experience some of the most beautiful relationships - most of them which had turned sour towards the end, but none-the-less, were still a beautiful heart-break. 

  “I’m still going to worry about him.” Dustin remarked as they walked into the mall. Ophelia hummed, dropping her hand on top of his hat covered head, ruffling it slightly before falling to rest on the bookbag he wore on his back. She made him stop for a second as she dropped her keys in her purse, pulling her wallet out. 

  “Alright, you head over to Scoops, here’s some money,” She told Dustin, handing him a couple of bills. “Steve is going to try and give you free ice cream, tell him no and give him the money or put it in the tip jar. Trust me, it has been my entire summer.” She instructed him. Admittedly, her heart would soar like an eagle in the sky when Steve would push her hand full of money, insisting that it was on the house every time she wanted an ice cream, thinking that he might just actually feel the same way she did, her desperate heart filling her mind with hopes that would quickly cloud over with dark thunder clouds when he would send flirty statements over the counter at the next girl. 

  “Wait, you’re not coming with me?” Dustin furrowed his brows, taking the money. 

  “I will be there in a few, I’m heading over to work to check the schedule, and Brett said he needed to talk to me about something anyway.” She told him, stuffing her wallet back in her purse. Dustin narrowed his eyes at her at the name. 

  “Whose Brett?” He cocked his head to the side. He had heard the name before, most likely from one of Ophelia’s friends gushing about random guys while they were locked up in her room. 

  “He works with me, he’s also the captain of the hockey team - Melissa never shut up about him in grade nine,” She answered him, patting his shoulder. Dustin hummed at this, nodding. He looked at the bills she handed him, counting them to see how much she gave him. “I won’t be long, Brett usually writes my hours down for me anyway.” Told him before walking away from him and towards the escalators, heading towards Tower Records. Dustin didn’t pay the information any attention as he made his way towards Scoops. 

  His sneakers squeaked against the tiled floor as he looked around the mall in awe. He hadn’t seen it yet, only heard about it in Ophelia’s letters to him while he was at camp, but nothing she said could do the actual thing justice. The bright neon signs, the high-end stores. The sleek glass in the ceiling letting the sun provide natural light. The fountain, the hustle and bussle. It was great. Walking into the sailor themed ice cream parlor, he took in the blue and white striped wallpaper and the cheery sailor tone playing. 

  Steve was nowhere to be seen when he walked in, so he fell into line behind the two people standing at the counter. He waited patiently, gripping the now crumpled bills in his hands. He could see the girl behind the counter with short blonde hair what had the softest wave to it. Her blue eyes looked bored and unenthusiastic. “Have a nice day.” She drawled, her eyes vacant of joy as she handed the two people their ice cream cones. 

  “Thank you.” The girl smiled at the blonde before the pair of them left, happily licking their ice cream. Dustin smiled, knowing he was so close to seeing Steve again. The girl behind the counter pressed her hands into it, leaning on them as she turned her uninterested gaze on the beaming Dustin who showed off his toothless smile. 

  “Hi.” Dustin basically bounced in his spot from excitement. 

  “Hi.” She drawled, not nearly as excited as Dustin was. Silence passed between them as they looked at each other. Dustin’s smile never filtered and the blonde’s expression never changed. Dustin opened his mouth, gesturing towards himself awkwardly. 

  “I’m Dustin.” He introduced himself, thinking that Steve had told his co-worker all about him. He told almost anyone who would listen about how excited he was to get back home and see Steve so he expected nothing less from his older friend. 

  “I’m Robin.” The blonde replied, a forced smile on her lips. She really just wanted him to order his ice cream and move along so that maybe the day could go by faster. 

  “Pleasure to meet you, uh-” He told her politely. Much like she wanted him to hurry up, Dustin just wanted this to be done with so he could see his friend. “Is-is he here?” Dustin asked with a gesture of his hand, his bright eyes scanning over the space behind the counter. 

  “Is who here?” Robin asked, somewhat intrigued with this strange child. He was so happy and cheerful, his eyes bright. Just then, the swinging door leading to the backroom burst open making them snap their attention towards it. With a squeak of his sneaker, Steve was there, his eyes wide with excitement, just knowing that his friend was out in the parlor. 

  “Henderson,” He stepped away from the door, raising his arms in the air, a wide smile on his face at the sight of the curly haired teen. Dustin started to laugh, pointing towards the older boy as his smile grew, his eyes squinting from it. “Henderson! He’s back,” Steve jumped around as he rushed around the counter, trying to reach his best friend. “He’s back!” He basically yelled, pointing to Dustin. He glanced at Robin as if she was supposed to care. Robin clued into just who the strange child was at the last name. Ophelia’s little brother. Their cheery happiness was almost uncanny.

  “I’m back! You got the job!” Dustin exclaimed.

  “I got the job,” Steve matched Dustin’s enthusiasm, making a trumpet noise while pretending to play one. “Hey, oh!” He said as they performed an intricate handshake. Robin watched the two with raised eyebrows as they pretended to be fighting with lightsabers before Dustin pretended to stab Steve, prompting Steve to pretend his guts were falling out. They finished the handshake, looking at each other and laughing. Steve rested his arm on the cooler beside him, both of them sighing and coming down from their laughter. 

  “How many children are you friends with?” Robin asked, leaning forward on her hands more, eyeing Steve. He certainly wasn’t the same Steve she knew in high school. Steve looked at her, sighing before sniffling as his smile shrunk. Swiping his finger under his nose, he gestured towards Robin with his hand, giving Dustin a look. 

  “So, hey, uh,” Steve started, looking around the parlor, placing both his hands on his hips and kicking his foot out. The musical laughter of the girl he was almost positive he would see today was missing. “Where’s your sister? I thought she’d come in with you.” He asked, looking at Dustin. Dustin shrugged, looking around the parlor to take it all in. 

  “She said she’d be here soon, she had to stop by the store to check the schedule and apparently some guy wanted to talk to her about something there,” Dustin told him, once again not thinking much of it. “I think she said his name was like Brent or something, I don’t know - I wasn’t really listening.” Dustin admitted. Steve’s heart sunk slightly, floating slowly to the bottom of his feet like a paper falling to the floor. 

  “You mean Brett?” Robin spoke up, her eyebrow perked curiously. One thing about her not being in the popular crowd, she learned to observe and gather her information that way. She could clearly see how Steve felt about Ophelia. Whenever she came into the store on her break, his brown eyes would light up like a kid on Christmas. He would constantly bring her up. He could be scrubbing the staff toilet and find a way to bring Ophelia up. She was almost positive that Steve was head over heels for her.

  “Yeah-yeah, that sounds right.” Dustin nodded, not paying much attention as he scanned over the ice cream tubs in the cooler.

  “Oh man, that guy’s been hooked on her for like two years, I heard he took the job at Tower Records because he heard that she was going to be working there.” Robin informed them. Steve could have sworn he had died right then and there. He felt strangely possessive and protective over the eldest Henderson since she squared up against Billy and lasted pretty well until she ended up on the floor next to Steve, knocked out. The sight of her beat up face was the last thing Steve saw before he finally clocked out. 

  If he was being completely honest, he had developed a crush on her way before Nancy. He would always see her floating around the halls of the school with a bright smile, always saying hi to everyone. It was like she was friends with the entire school population. You’d be hard pressed to find someone who didn’t like Ophelia Henderson, but somehow, Steve hung out with the only two people who didn’t. They despised the girl. Thought she was too nice, too good even though everyone at school has seen her knocking shot after shot back at parties. When he had developed feelings for Nancy, he had thought his feelings for Ophelia were long gone, but seeing her taking no shit from Billy and fighting the Demodogs alongside him last year proved him semi-wrong, instead of a crush, he had a fierce need to protect her and keep her way from any guy who he deemed not right for her (which was pretty much all of them). 

  As if on cue, she floated into the parlor with a large smile on her face. “Hey everyone!” She cheered, walking up to her brother and Steve. Steve looked at her, his own smile stretching on his face. He could practically feel his face light up at the sight of her. She smiled brightly at him, rolling up onto the balls of her feet excitedly. 

  “Hey, Leah, Dustin said Brett wanted to talk to you, what’d he say?” Robin asked, curious to see what the development of the love triangle that was brewing. Only an idiot couldn’t see that Steve and Ophelia both liked each other and you would have to be living under a rock not to realize that Brett Morris also chased after the oblivious girl. 

  Ophelia smiled wider - if that was even possible - at the question, her eyes lightning up with excitement. Steve gazed at her expression, wishing he could have caused it. “He wants to hang out with me, as a date!” She exclaimed, walking between her brother and Steve to stand in front of the counter. Steve wanted to die at this news. Brett Morris was a loser - a scrawny, entitled loser who flew through girls like crazy. He had no place going on a date with someone as pure and sweet as Ophelia. He wouldn’t appreciate the beauty of her eyes, swirling with different colours and sparkling with light. Would he fully understand just how precious her laughter was? 

  “Really? That’s awesome.” Robin smiled at the excited girl. 

  “Yeah, I know! I have to go get a new outfit,” She gushed, whirling around to look at Dustin and Steve. “I’ll be back later to get him, do not hype him up on sugar, understand be Harrington?” She told him, not sticking around long enough to get an answer, instead rushing back out of the parlor. Steve pressed his lips into a fine line, his nose flared. Robin looked at him with an amused smile, ready for the chaos of a love triangle. 

***

  Ophelia sauntered back into Scoops, looking at the rush to see Robin manning the counter alone, Steve and her brother nowhere to be seen. “Hey, Robin, where did Steve take my brother?” She asked as Erica and her group of Erica clones walked out. Robin looked towards her, a stressed out look in her eyes. 

  “They’re in the back,” She told her, nudging her head towards the door as she walked towards it herself. Ophelia rushed around the counter, following Robin into the back room as she burst through the door. “All right, babysitting time is over, you need to get in there.” Robin told Steve walking into the room. 

  “Yeah, and it’s time for us to go Dustin.” Ophelia told her brother. The two girls stopped, looking at the two boys. Steve backed up to stand beside Dustin who was at the table, facing them. Their eyes were wide and scared, almost as if they were caught doing something they shouldn’t have been. Steve held a half-eaten banana in his hand, his cheeks pushed out with bits of banana in them, mid-chew. She looked at them oddly, knowing that nothing good could come of this. 

  “Hey! My board,” Robin exclaimed, whirling around to look at Steve and Dustin. Ophelia looked over at her to see her standing by a board on the wall that seemed to hold the Russian characters on it. “That was important data, Shitbirds!” Ophelia rolled her eyes at that. It wasn’t important data to her, in fact, maybe now that the board was erased, the game would stop and Ophelia could find the anecdote for the poison. 

  “I guarantee you, what we’re doing is way more important than your data.” Dustin told her, earning a glare from his sister. Steve nodded along, eating the rest of his banana and tossing the peel to the table in front of Dustin. 

  “Oh yeah, and how do you know these Russians are up to no good anyways?” She challenged, walking to stand in front of the table.

  “What Russians?” Ophelia asked, suddenly very concerned. Steve and Dustin looked at each other with startled looks. 

   “Your brother intercepted a Russian transmission using some sort of radio and they plan to translate the transmission and become American Heroes.” Robin told her. Ophelia nodded slowly, taking the information in. 

  “How does she know about the Russians?” Dustin whispered to Steve.

  “I don’t know.” Steve spoke through a mouth full of banana, shrugging his shoulders. His brown eyes were wide, his eyebrows shooting up into his hairline. Under other circumstances, Ophelia would think he looked cute, but not when they were trying to translate a Russian transmission. 

  “You told her about-” 

  “It wasn’t me!” Steve defended himself, cutting Dustin off. 

  “Hello! I can hear you, actually I can hear everything. You are both extremely loud,” Robin broke the news to them. “You think you have evil Russians plotting against our country, on tape, and you’re trying to translate it, but haven’t figured out a single word because you didn’t realize that Russian’s use a completely different alphabet than we do,” She rattled off. Dustin and Steve looked at each other in shock before looking back at Robin. “Is that about right?” She asked. Ophelia stepped up, standing beside her. If these two idiots were getting into something then so was she. They were pretty much a package deal at this point. 

  Robin lunged forward, trying to swipe the tape off the table, but Steve grabbed it before her. “Woah - Oh! What do you think you’re doing?” Steve asked her with a crazed look in his eyes. Ophelia raised her eyebrows at it.

  “I wanna hear it!” Robin bounced slightly, showing more enthusiasm that she ever does when doing her job. 

  “I do too.” Ophelia told them, walking over and pulling out a chair from the table, sitting down in the spot in front of Steve. Steve shook his head at her. 

  “Why?” Both Dustin and Steve asked at the same time, mostly directed to Robin. They could see why Ophelia would want to, since she had been by Dustin’s side since Will’s disappearance. 

  “Cause maybe I can help,” Robin shrugged. “I am fluent in four languages, you know?” She disclosed to them proudly. Ophelia looked over at her, impressed. 

  “Russian?” Dustin asked, intrigued. Robin leaned closer to him. 

  “Ou-yay are-yay umb-day.” She told him. Steve and Dustin looked excited, making Ophelia shake her head, slapping her hand to her forehead. 

  “Oh-ho-ho!” Steve exclaimed.

  “Holy shit!” Dustin smiled wide, thinking that she actually spoke Russian to them. Robin straightened up, her face blank while Ophelia was questioning her brother’s sanity. 

  “That was pig-latin, Digus,” She told him, making their smiles fall. Steve looked down at Dustin, slapping him with the banana peel that he had picked up for some reason, muttering ‘idiot’ under his breath, not wanting to admit that he also thought Robin was speaking Russian. Robin sat across the table from Ophelia. “But, I speak Spanish and French and Italian, and I’ve been in band for twelve years. My ears are little geniuses, trust me.” Robin argued her case. 

  “I also speak fluent French and a little latin and, don’t forget, I’ve saved you two before.” Ophelia reminded them, giving them a knowing look. Steve and Dustin looked at each other, unsure if they should let them help. Steve definitely didn’t want to let Ophelia help. It was too dangerous, it went against every fiber in his being telling him to protect her. 

  “Come on, it’s your turn to sling ice cream and my turn to translate - I don’t even want credit, I’m just bored!” Robin groaned to Steve, sliding the ice cream scoop across the table towards him. The bell from the counter dinged, the customer wanting service. Steve looked at her hand before looking at Dustin. The bell dinged again making him sigh and grab the scoop, placing the tape back on the table again. He glanced at Dustin again as the younger boy shrugged, not seeing how the two girls couldn’t help them since they have yet to figure out anything so far. Shifting his eyes to Robin, seeing her pleading with him, but what made him bend like a hot spoon was when he looked at Ophelia. Her big eyes looking at him hopefully but with just enough glare that dared him to try and say no to them.

  “Fine, you two can help.” He grumbled, making his way out the door. Robin and Ophelia cheered, Robin scooping the tape recorder up. Steve huffed, defeated. He didn’t like the idea of her being involved with this. The past two years, he wasn’t able to stop her from getting involved with the Upside Down because she knew about it before him both times; this time, he knew about it before her so he had thought he could keep her out of it, but boy was he wrong.

[purplesurveys]

1013

surveys by -thoughtlessdork

Have you ever had the chicken pox? No. I’m constantly in a place of waiting for it to pass by, because everyone tells me all people are bound to have it at one point in their lives (idk how true that is, though). I am also told it gets a lot suckier as one gets older, so...not too thrilled about it at all.

how often do you do laundry? I don’t handle that chore myself, but it’s done 1–2 times a week in our house.

Have you ever been evicted? Nopes.

would you grow your own garden? I don’t see that happening. I’m a magnet for killing plants.

do you know anyone who snores? I do.

Trigger warning kinda, by the end.

what is your favorite font? Proxima Nova. It’s the default font that my org used for all documents and works-in-progress, and it ended up becoming my actual real-life favorite. I’ve always picked out that font even outside of org matters.

do you know what a wombat is? Sure.

would you make a good movie critic? Not at all. I don’t know enough about different filmmaking elements to make a reliable critic. I’ve criticized things like acting, plots, and dialogues in the past, of course; but there’s still so many things that go into films that aren’t overtly projected like lighting, symbolism, hidden meanings, etc. I don’t have a very good nose for those.

what goal are you aiming for this year? In the last 8 weeks of the year? Hmm...avoiding corona would be at the top of that list, lmao.

are you currently reading any books at the moment? No. I’ve stopped opening the book I used to constantly mention on here.

when i say foxy lady what comes to mind? Beyoncé’s character in the Austin Powers movie she was in lol; her name was Foxxy.

would you have liked to have lived during the Victorian times? Wasn’t this era like a golden age of sorts for the UK? I’d love to visit for that purpose; but given the still-horrible hygiene and living conditions for most people of the time, I wouldn’t choose to live there.

would you own a Siamese cat? No.

have you ever had an ultimate adrenaline rush? I don’t think so. I’ve had bursts of energy in the past, but I wouldn’t call any of them an ultimate adrenaline rush.

do you like deviled eggs? I’ve never had them; it’s not a common dish here. But they always look so good in the American shows I watch??? I really hope they taste as good as they look.

what tends to upset you? Hearing anything about animal abuse.

what's the farthest you've walked? I can’t give you a distance, but my parents opted for us to walk the whole time we were in Bali (except if we had a tour day which included transportation). Walking in an unfamiliar - and very humid - country and not knowing where anything is (this was before food and travel apps got as detailed as they are today) and ending up walking long stretches because you can’t locate any good local spots is a very easy way to run out of patience, apparently.

what is your favorite horror movie? Carrie was pretty fun.

what does your favorite shirt look like? It’s a twist on the Chicago flag, made black and red and with a raised fist in the middle. At the back it says “CM Punk: Best in the World.” Been my favorite and most overused shirt for the past 9 years. My friends tease me about it sometimes, but I don’t care lol, the shirt is very significant to me.

is your life like a daily routine? It is, but I prefer that it is. I like when things are in my control and, for the most part, predictable. I enjoy spontaneity in short bursts.

were you ever told as a child if you eat carrots you'll have pretty eyes? So many times.

what career are you most interested in? Communications and media, so it’s great that I’m headed there so far.

have you ever seen a rooster? Sure.

what time do you usually wake up? I wake up wake up by 7:30 or 8 AM, but I usually also wake up for a bit any time between 4–6 AM. Sometimes I choose to stay up from then, and sometimes I’d want to go back to sleep.

what do you think about religion? It’s good when people use it for good, or if it has helped save a person’s life. In my own personal experience, though, it’s beenhard to find Christians who aren’t hypocritical. So even though I see religion’s potential, I don’t have a lot of trust in believers themselves.

what made you feel most accomplished in your life so far? Graduating college.

have you ever seen a lunar eclipse? I saw the super blue blood moon two years ago, which according to a quick Google search is a lunar eclipse! So yeah, I’ve seen one.

what are you allergic to? No allergies.

do you ever feel like people hold things you do or say against you? Only my mom does this.

what can't you afford but wish you could? Front-row Wrestlemania tickets. My childhood (and now adulthood) dream is to go to Mania 50 which is only 14 years from now, but at least I still have more than enough time to save up for it. 

--

what is one word that sums up this year so far? Revelatory. ever felt like you were putting your life in danger? [trigger warning] Yes, it’s called suicidal tendencies. what do you like with your eggs? If scrambled, with cheese. If omelette...stuff that crap up with everything lol. Tomatoes, bell peppers, mushrooms, cheese, ham, bacon, and onions are all good in my book. what remedy do you partake when experiencing the common cold? The good ol’ wait-for-it-to-go-away life hack. would you ever spend a weekend in the mountains in a log cabin? That sounds amazing. I sure would. have you ever been called a psycho? No. have you ever taken martial arts? would you? No but I was always a little envious of my cousin who was taken to taekwondo class every weekend when we were kids. Sure, I’d take classes if I had the chance. who is someone you look up to? Nacho, but he’s gone now. is there something you're anxious about? I have work jitters for tomorrow, but they’re manageable for now. Otherwise I’m feeling pretty good. what is the longest you've gone without sleep? A little above 24. what is the longest you've been on the phone? This makes me cringe now, but it was like 8 hours long or something like that. It was still the ~honeymoon phase of that relationship and we were still clingy. We never did it again after that. do you care about calories? No. do you know someone with a really annoying laugh? Nah, can’t think of anyone. what band do you mostly always listen to no matter what mood? Paramore.  have you ever been to Indianapolis? Nope.

--

what type of bread do you like to eat? I eat white bread all the time, but my favorite kind is brioche. do you have any great great grandparents still living? Two greats is a bit too much don’t you think? Lmao. Anyway, my last great-grandparent died in 2010. I never knew my dad’s grandparents, and my great-grandfather on my mom’s side had died all the way back in the 70s. what is one country that you really want to visit someday? India. who usually cooks or what do you usually crave the most? Those are two different questions haha. My parents take turn cooking; and as for my craving, I find myself seeking sushi most of the time. ever been associated in a program that was a complete waste of time? Yep, like that one time I had to attend this 5-hour mandatory program/seminar before my driver’s license could be issued to me; it taught me nothing I didn’t already know about driving, and it used driving tutorials that I’m pretty sure were recorded in the 90s. This seminar took place in 2016. do weird numbers call your phone? Not regularly. Occasionally an unknown number will come in, but I reject all those. where are you right now? Sitting up on my bed. do you tend to care about other people's feelings more than your own? Yes. I really shouldn’t. what type of lifestyle do you want to obtain? if you haven't obtained it [trigger warning] I haven’t even figured out yet if I love life enough to want to stay in it. A type of lifestyle isn’t much of a priority for now. what was something that use to frighten you as a child? Getting lost at the mall. have you ever been on a train? Just once. who's been in your life the longest? did you expect this person to still be around? Apart from family, Angela. Yes, she’s here for the long haul. how do you feel about anatomy? Fascinating. I’d take a class on it. Insert interesting fact here: Read this on Reddit a few days ago, so I’ll just copy-paste the whole thing: “When Jadwiga, the King of Poland (medieval Poland referred to every ruler as King regardless of gender), was considering a marriage proposal from the Grand Duke of Lithuania, a chief concern among her court was that said Duke was rumored to have massive genitals to the point that they would kill his wife on their wedding night. Two of her councilors volunteered to travel to Lithuania to try and discover the truth of these rumors, which naturally meant they would watch the Duke as he bathed. They returned and happily reported that not only weren’t the Duke’s genitals fatally large, they were in fact a tad smaller than average, so nothing to worry about. Thus Poland and Lithuania were united, and the rest is history.” Got a chuckle out of that one when I read it that I just had to scroll through the entire thread again just to be able to share it here lmao.

[raysofcrosby]

REASON

“𝘠𝘰𝘶 𝘤𝘢𝘯 𝘭𝘰𝘷𝘦 𝘴𝘰𝘮𝘦𝘰𝘯𝘦 𝘴𝘰 𝘮𝘶𝘤𝘩...𝘣𝘶𝘵 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘤𝘢𝘯 𝘯𝘦𝘷𝘦𝘳 𝘭𝘰𝘷𝘦 𝘱𝘦𝘰𝘱𝘭𝘦 𝘢𝘴 𝘮𝘶𝘤𝘩 𝘢𝘴 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘮𝘪𝘴𝘴 𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘮.” – 𝙅𝙤𝙝𝙣 𝙂𝙧𝙚𝙚𝙣, 𝘼𝙣 𝘼𝙗𝙪𝙣𝙙𝙖𝙣𝙘𝙚 𝙤𝙛 𝙆𝙖𝙩𝙝𝙚𝙧𝙞𝙣𝙚𝙨

𝘨𝘪𝘧 𝘤𝘳𝘦𝘥𝘪𝘵 (𝘹)

𝘳𝘦𝘲𝘶𝘦𝘴𝘵𝘦𝘥: yes | no

𝘸𝘢𝘳𝘯𝘪𝘯𝘨(𝘴): bad words here and there plus some alcohol consumption otherwise its just full of moody!nolan and quite angsty tbh.

𝘸𝘰𝘳𝘥 𝘤𝘰𝘶𝘯𝘵: 4,698

𝘪𝘯𝘴𝘱𝘪𝘳𝘦𝘥 𝘣𝘺: break up in a small town by sam hunt

𝘢𝘶𝘵𝘩𝘰𝘳𝘴 𝘯𝘰𝘵𝘦: yikes i’m back with another piece i wrote for my creative writing class but obviously i changed the names– i couldn’t have my professor thinking i was writing about hockey players ya know anyway like i said above, it’s pretty angsty lmao idk why i love writing sad things so much but oh well!!! enjoy!!! ;-) 

"Nolan hurry up back there! We need to get back soon!" Travis called out from the front of the store as he placed his booze of choice for the night up onto the counter.

"Yeah, yeah I'm coming," Nolan replied, turning his attention back to the liquor in front of him. He'd been home in Winnipeg now for a good month or so since the Flyers season had ended with no playoff bid. Yeah it sucked, actually, it really fucking sucked– but there was nothing he could do about it now. So when Nico had called and said he was coming to visit, Nolan took the opportunity to invite Travis too. Because what better way to get your mind off of the lack of playoff hockey, than by spending it out on a lake and drinking with your best friends?

In the few days that they'd been here, the three boys had already wreaked enough havoc in the Patrick home, that Nolan knew he was only one inappropriate joke away before his mom would book the three of them a hotel room and tell them to stay there. But they couldn't help it, their friendship was tight and after the whirlwind of a season both of their teams had– they needed a little fun.

Which is why he was standing in front of five rows of liquor, trying to decide which one he'd make his poison for the night. An old friend from Juniors was throwing a party at his house, and obviously Nolan, Travis and Nico were invited. The old friend said that the party was for Nolan, so to speak, a celebration on his return back from Philly and to commemorate the fact that he'd actually left his house for once. But in reality, it was just a get together with old friends while getting wasted on incredulous amounts of liquor all while sloppy games of beer pong, suck and blow and every other cliche high school drinking game Hollywood could manage into one movie, played on in the background.

Not that Nolan was complaining or anything. He was actually excited about the party since he hadn't really seen or talked to most of the people who would be in attendance since last summer. That, and he was always down for a party. His eyes skimmed across two separate bottles of vodka, unsure of which to choose for tonight as 'eenie meenie miney mo' played in his head.

"You should go with Belvedere," Nolan straightened up and looked to his left to see you standing maybe a foot or two away from him. "Black Cow usually made you throw up."

He opened his mouth to speak, but he couldn't make the words come out. Hell, he couldn't even find the words if he wanted to. He could barely even believe that you were there, standing right in front of him...in person, after all this time. He blinked once, twice, adding a third time for good measure to make sure that his mind wasn't playing any tricks on him. But you were still standing there.

"Hi, Nolan." You laughed, tossing some of your hair over your shoulder as you motioned towards the bottles in front of him. "You don't mind if I..."

"No, g-" he cleared his throat and stepped back from the shelves, "go ahead."

You smiled and walked closer to the shelves, bending down and causing your hair to fall back over your shoulders. You grabbed two bottles of Ciroc and stood back up, a bottle in each hand. "Thanks," you said, biting the inside of your cheek, a habit you wished you could rid yourself of but never had the willpower to do so. "Well, I guess I'll see you later?"

Nolan nodded while simultaneously swallowing the lump that had grown in his throat. You lightly laughed and turned away, walking to the end of the aisle and disappearing out of his sight. He took a deep breath and closed his eyes, trying to figure out if what just happened was one huge mindfuck. "Nolan what the fuck, come on!" Travis called out. Nolan opened his eyes t see Travis standing there at the end of the aisle with an annoyed look on his face. "We're about to leave without you and your alcohol."

Nolan rolled his eyes as turned away from his teammate. "Calm the fuck down, I'm coming. I just couldn't decide." He looked at the shelves and grabbed both the Belvedere and Black Cow vodkas. At this point, he knew that he'd probably be needing both bottles for tonight.

He walked down the aisle and brushed past Travis, putting his bottles on the counter and looking at Nico. "Sorry, I couldn't decide what to get."

"Well, at least you're here now," Nico shrugged, handing his I.D. and credit card over to the cashier. "Because now we can get home faster and then start drinking and therefore get wasted."

Nolan laughed, shaking his head as he stuffed his hands into his jean pockets. "Yeah, I couldn't decide between the two, so I got both."

"Did you talk to Y/N?" Travis asked, resting his elbow on the counter and causing Nico to look at him.

"Y/N? Y/N was here?" He asked, looking at Nolan. "Where?"

"You guys were still grabbing something. I let her check out before us since she already had all of her stuff." Travis replied, picking up the two cases of beer off the counter. "So Patty, did you talk to her?"

Nolan scrunched his nose and bit the inside of his cheek as he thought about whether or not he should lie to his best friends. Would it even benefit them if he told them that he had talked to her? Instead, he just sighed. "Kind of. She told me not to get Black Cow because I always had the habit of throwing up after drinking it all," he replied, grabbing the bag holding his two bottles in it.

"And yet you bought it anyway?" Nico asked, putting his I.D. and credit card back into his wallet and giving Nolan a confused look. "Can I ask why?"

"I need to get drunk and that's the way to do it," Nolan replied, shrugging his shoulders and walking out of the liquor store with his friends right behind him.

"God, I knew we were best friends for a reason." Travis sighed, as he got into the drivers' side of his car, Nico in the passenger side and Nolan in the back with all of the alcohol.

Nolan dug into his front pocket and brought his cellphone out, unlocking it and opening Instagram. He didn't feel the need to scroll down the feed filled with empty smiles of the people he followed, nor did he pay any mind to the red number over in the top right of his screen showing just how many DM's he'd received from the many girls who vied for his attention and the endless amount of fans who congratulated him on the season. Nope, he went straight to your profile and scrolled down to find what he was looking for.

He didn't know how many times he'd stared at this picture, millions perhaps. Or however many times it takes for it to bur a picture into one's mind further than it already was. It was the last picture you and him had taken together, about three weeks into the new season. You had come out and stayed with him and Travis for the weekend since it was your fall break. He could still see you sitting there, wearing his jersey and talking amongst the other WAGs at warm-ups. It had been the best weekend of his life, he thought that nothing could get better than this very moment.

After that weekend, you flew back home to return to school and he couldn't wait till you could come down again. He was already planning your second trip, not paying any mind to the fact your facetime calls had gotten shorter, the texts didn't come in multiples and you both were playing a consistent game of phone tag every day. A week after you'd gone back to school, you broke up with him. And when the Flyers came up to Winnipeg for a game, you still showed up with his family, only this time you weren't wearing his jersey, and when the Patrick's invited you out to dinner after the game, you didn't go out.

And Nolan was pissed. Not only because of the fact that you had broken up with him a week after just spending hours in bed together, cuddling and talking about the future, but because you hadn't spoken a word to him or even given him a full reason as to why you broke off your 2-year relationship. All he got from you, hours before the game was that you didn't think that being in a relationship was healthy for the two of you right now. When he asked you what you meant by that, you just said that you would 'tell him later.'

Well, here he was, five months later at home and still no explanation. It fucked him up bad five months ago, he wasn't afraid to admit it. Travis had called him out on his shitty appearance once or twice and even Nico had noticed his different behavior whenever they were able to get in a talk. Yeah, you had fucked him up real bad and truth be told, he hasn't been able to get it completely out of his mind since.

"Nolan, you good man?" Nico asked, waving his hand in front of Nolan's face and causing him to jump.

Nolan turned to see that it was Nico and sighed, locking his phone and sliding it back into his pocket. "Yeah, I'm good." He brought his solo cup to his lips and took a long drink, the vodka numbing his mouth for a partial moment as the burning feeling traveled down his throat.

Nico sighed and shook his head as Nolan turned around to face him. "Why don't you just talk to her, Nolan?"

Nolan took another sip of his drink. "Two reasons. Reason number one," he said, holding up his index finger. "She hasn't reached out to me in months. And reason number two," Another sip as the burning feeling followed soon after and he held up his middle finger. "She's not even here, so I couldn't talk to her even if I could."

"Well it looks like it's your lucky day buddy," Nico said, bringing the cup to his lips and nodding in the direction behind Nolan. "Because she's making herself a drink right now."

Nolan turned to see you standing at the designated liquor counter, making yourself your signature drink– captain and coke. Nico patted his shoulder and stood next to him. "It's now or never," Nolan went to say something but Nico waved him off. "And no, never is not an option."

"Well, you can't say it's not an option AFTER you give it as an option!" He yelled out as Nico waved him off and walked towards a beer pong table.

Nolan took a deep breath again, exhaling before bringing the brim of his cup back to his lips and chugging the rest of his drink. He wiped his mouth with the back of his hand and stood a bit taller before making his way to the counter. As he neared you, he hesitantly reached out for your arm, only to back out at the last minute and turn around. "Nolan?" He stopped in his tracks and took another deep breath before turning around and putting on his best 'happy' smile that he could. "I thought that was you."

"What gave it away?" He asked, putting his empty cup onto the counter.

"Honestly? The hair," you replied, looking up at his hair. "It's gotten longer. I don't think there are many guys in the world who could pull off that length of hair."

"Yeah, my mom says I need to get a haircut soon," He laughed, running his fingers through his hair.

"What's your poison for the night?" You asked, bringing the orange solo cup to your lips.

"Belvedere," He said, grabbing the bottle off of the counter and pouring it into his cup, filling it. "As suggested."

"Well, at least you'll be sure to remember your night then," you laughed, brushing the hair out of your face.

Nolan nodded and put the cap back onto the bottle, setting it back down onto the counter. He took a sip, pondering his thoughts on just how he could get you alone to talk about why you split up. You were looking around the room and sipping from your drink, smiling and waving at just about everyone you knew...which was just about everyone in attendance. The only person that you couldn't seem to keep your eyes on for more than a few seconds though, was him– and he took notice.

He couldn't help but wonder how it got to this point. How the once comfortable silence between you two that could be there for hours on end, suddenly flipped a switch and no longer seemed comfortable. Had it been something he did? Was it the way he approached you? But you had seemed so comfortable when he came over, open to conversation. "Hey, I was wondering if–"

"Hey over here!" You perked up, raising your arm into the air and waving it before looking back at Nolan. "Sorry, hold that thought. I'll be right back though, okay?”

Nolan just nodded and took another sip of his drink as you smiled and disappeared into the crowd. "You fucking idiot," he mumbled, downing another sip as he nerves began to take over the more he thought about talking to you. 

After you first broke up, he was set on needing to see you. He needed for you to tell him in person that this was all a mistake. That you didn't mean to break up with him. And then a few days later, he found himself never wanting to see you again. He always knew that it would be near impossible to do, never seeing you again, especially since you shared all of your friends and every hangout around town and he had nowhere to go in the summers BUT home. So he kept that plausibility in the back of his mind, which is why he was so shocked about seeing you in the store so soon. He thought that he'd at least have until the end of the summer– but he was a damn fool, that's for sure.

He took another long sip of his drink, feeling less of the burn this time around. He looked around the room, spotting Travis and Nico playing beer pong against two girls that Nolan couldn't make out. As his eyes wandered more, he found himself more focused on trying to find where you had gone, wondering what was taking so long and who you went to see. When his eyes landed on the front door, he felt his stomach drop into his shoes. His lips tightened and he turned back to the counter, grabbing his unopened bottle of Black Cow and pushed himself away from the counter and through the crowd.

"Nolan, hey! Dude where are you going?" Travis yelled, his voice still a mumble among the loud music.

Nolan had heard him, sure. But he didn't care to stop and look to see what he wanted. Nope, he was on a mission and that mission took him towards the glass back door and into the backyard.

There weren't as many people out here, but he kept walking until he hit the old playground set- taking a seat onto one of the swings and opening the bottle. His breathing was heavy as he replayed the image in my mind again and again. A mix of anger, hurt and betrayal was running through him at a higher level than he knew what to do with. So he did the only thing that he thought could help it. He brought the bottle to my lips, taking a long hard swig- no longer feeling the burning in his throat.

He always knew that there was a big chance that he'd see you around town, or that you'd move on from your relationship. But he never thought that you'd move onto someone he knew...someone who was one of my close friends back in school and spent countless of hours with on the ice growing up. He took another swig and looked at the night sky.

Yeah, I never expected that bullshit.

He hadn't walked back into the house since he saw you. He could barely get himself to move, so on the swing he stayed. He brought the bottle back to his lips and tossed his head back, taking all the alcohol it had left to offer. When the bottle was empty, he stood himself up the best that he could, only to stumble a bit to his left. He reached out for the chain of the swing and kept himself from falling down. "Nolan, hey!" Nico called out, jogging over to him from the porch.

"Dude where have you been for the past hour?" Travis added, following behind him.

"Drowning myself i-in vodka and feelings," Nolan slurred, holding up the empty bottle. "Not really the b-best mix."

"Holy shit Patty, did you drink all of that?" Nico asked, his eyes wide.

"Yep!" Nolan yelled, throwing his arms in the air and laughing. "And i-it was delicious."

"What the hell were you thinking? You're going to be throwing up for a week!" Travis reached for the bottle and Nolan pulled it back. "Give me the fucking bottle Nolan."

"I had to drown out the image man. I can't stop s-seeing it." He slurred, holding the empty bottle tight in his grasp.

"What image? Seeing what Nolan?"

"Y/N AND NOAH!" Nolan didn't even recognize his own voice as it echoed against the night sky, barely a blip on the radar of anyone in attendance of the party. "I went to talk to her and she le-left to get someone," he hiccuped again, looking at his two best friends. "I saw her kissing h-him!"

It was then that the began to notice the slight churning of his stomach. It only began to escalate when he saw the look on his two best friends faces. He expected them to look surprised, but imagine his own surprise when he noticed just how casual they looked instead. He opened his mouth to say something, yell something at them, but he couldn't bring himself to.

"We know, Nolan. That's why we've been kind of pushing you so hard to talk to her." Nico said, reaching for the bottle.

Travis gave Nolan a guilt-ridden look. He knew he fucked up by not telling Nolan, but he also didn't expect for you to be at the party either.  "Yeah man, we didn't want you to be caught off guard by it.."

"Well, it didn't fucking work you assholes." Nolan threw the bottle down and swallowed the horrible gut feeling he had before standing tall. "I'm going to talk to her."

"Oh no you're not," Nico said, grabbing an arm and pulling him back as Travis grabbed the other one. "We're taking you home."

"Let go!" Nolan yelled, snatching one arm free and working on the other. "If you were my best friends you'd let me do th-this."

"We are your best friends Nolan, which is exactly why we're not letting you do this."

Nolan glared at the two of them with a look that could send them both six feet under if at all possible. He opened his mouth to yell a bunch of obscenities at them when he felt his stomach begin to churn again, only this time it was much more violent. He grabbed onto the swingset and bent over, dry heaving until his stomach began to empty himself. As the first wave ended, he felt supportive pats on the back from his two friends. "Feel better?" Nico asked.

Nolan went to speak again, only to throw up even more. "I'll take that as a solid no," Travis mumbled, continuing to pat Nolan on the back.

"Hey Travis, is everything okay? Did you find him?"

"Yeah Y/N, we're–"

"Actually we're not," Nolan said, wiping his mouth and standing up as straight as he could, putting some weight against the swing set so he could seem like he was a tad bit sober.

"Nolan, I told you Black Cow always made you throw up," you laughed, bending down and picking the bottle up from the grass.

“Well, at least you told me something."

"What's that supposed to mean?" You asked, letting the bottle fall to your side as you looked at the hot mess that was Nolan Patrick. His hair was sticking to the sweat on his forehead from puking and the splotches on his cheeks had already turned tomato red.

"You know what I'm talking about Y/N." He sneered, waving his hands around.

"I really don't Nolan...." You looked at Travis and Nico for support, only to get shoulder shrugs and confused looks. "We're going to take you home."

As you walked towards him, it was all Nolan could do not to run into your arms. This had been the very thing he'd dreamed about and wanted for the last five months. For you to be there with him. But not like this, this wasn't how he had imagined it going– drunk on a bottle of vodka with bad breath. "No! Not until you give me a reason!"

You were starting to get mad. You couldn't understand what the hell he was drunk rumbling on and on about. "A reason? Nolan, what the hell are you talking about?"

This was it, he was going to throw up again. He could feel it in his chest as he opened his mouth to speak. "The reason why you broke my heart!" He yelled, a bit shocked at just how loud and assertive his voice had sounded. He noticed the way your face fell and that you had taken a few steps back, and he felt proud for a moment because he could see that you remembered.

"Yeah, now you know what I'm talking about. You said you would give me a reason and you never did. And now here I am, wanting to talk to you and see if maybe you could tell me something– ANYTHING! But no," he dropped his hands to his side and looked at her, shaking his head. "Instead I see you all over Noah."

You looked at him with the most gut-wrenching look he had ever seen in his life. A look that could cause even the person with the coldest heart in the world, to cave. And for a moment, that proud feeling he had turned into regret. He could see the tears begin to build in your eyes as you stared at him. He wanted you to be angry at him, to yell at him. He wanted you to feel something the way that he had felt these last five months...and yet you showed nothing. And that hurt him more than anything ever could...he couldn't help but wonder what the hell he had become.

"Nolan, I think it's time we go..." Travis said, standing in front of him clearing his throat as Nico turned his attention to you.

"Do you still love me?" Nolan croaked, looking over Travis's shoulder.

"Nolan I–"

"Just tell me Y/N, I need to know. Do you still love me?" He stared at you, searching your face for maybe even the slightest insight into what you were thinking and what your answer would be. "I need to know the answer so I can prepare myself for when I see you around town every summer. Because Y/N it's going to be so...fucking hard to see you at every stop light, every store. To see your car driving down the block and realizing that you're not mine anymore. That there's someone else's house you'll be going to for midnight dates. Someone else's arms you'll be crying in whenever you watch 'The Last Song.'" You stared at him, mouth dropped from his confession and tears stinging in your eyes. "Just tell me...please."

You took a shaky breath and hugged yourself, trying your best to keep your tears at bay. "Nolan, it's– it's complicated, okay?"

Nolan ran his tongue against his cheek and laughed to himself as he looked up at the sky in disbelief. "No, it's not. You just gave me your answer." He looked at Nico and stood up fully. "I'm ready to go home."

He stumbled his way by you, brushing against your shoulder and keeping his focus on the back gate. "Nolan, wait!" You called out, the desperation in your voice loud and clear to Nolan.

He took a deep breath and kept on walking as Nico and Travis joined him, each with an arm over his shoulders. "You okay buddy?" Travis asked, looking at him.

"I don't feel too hot," Nolan mumbled as they walked along the outside of the house.

"You'll feel better soon Patty, no doubt in my mind you won't."

"Ha, GOT YOU FUCKER!!!" A faint voice yelled as a slapping sound followed it.

Nolan opened his eyes slowly and saw that he was in his bedroom. He sat himself up slowly realizing very quickly that it wasn't the best decision to make since his world literally began to spin. He closed my eyes tight and sat there for a few moments before hearing a few more yells coming from outside his room, but too faint to really hear what was being said. When his case of the spins ended, he stood himself up and shuffled his way to his bedroom door, opening it and walking down the hallway. The closer he got to basement stairs, the clearer the voices became.

He pushed open the door to see Nico and Travis all sitting on the couch playing NHL '18. "Dude, are you even trying?" Travis taunted, throwing his arms in the air. "GOAL!!! LOOK AT THAT FRESH CELLY."

Nico rolled his eyes and looked up, clearing his throat. Travis looked at him and saw his eyes looking in Nolan's direction and then looked at Nolan. "Good morning sunshine, how are you feeling this morning?" He asked, smiling.

"Like I got ran over by a truck," Nolan said, his voice very hoarse. "How long have you guys been down here?"

"We slept here, dude," Travis said, looking at him. "Didn't really want to be in your puke stench of a room honestly."

"Yeah, no offense. But we still checked on you throughout the night." Nico added, shrugging his shoulders.

The doorbell rang and Nolan took a deep breath, looking out into the hallway expecting to hear his parents or his sisters move towards the door, but hearing nothing. "And my parents and sisters?"

"Your mom and sisters went out to brunch and your dad went golfing with a work friend," Travis replied, looking away from the tv. "So it looks like you'll be the one answering the door."

"Don't fuck up my man-cave," Nolan said, leaving the man-cave and walking further down the hallway until he reached the living room. He walked around the couch and over to the front door, looking through the peephole and not seeing anyone on the porch. Weird, but he didn't dwell much on it before he unlocked the door and opened it, looking out and not seeing anyone in visible distance. He shook his head, it was probably just some neighborhood kids messing around with the Nolan Patrick. 

God, kids were annoying sometimes.

Nolan went to turn away when something on the ground caught his eye. He bent down and saw an envelope lying face down on their welcome mat. Picking it up, he flipped it over to see it had his name written on it....in your handwriting. He opened the envelope and tilted it to the side, letting everything that was in it, slid into his hand. There was a letter and a Polaroid picture of the two of you and on the front, "always & forever" was written in your beautiful cursive handwriting. He flipped it over and instantly recognized the chicken scratch on the back...it was his own handwriting.

𝘠𝘰𝘶 𝘮𝘢𝘥𝘦 𝘵𝘪𝘮𝘦 𝘴𝘵𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘴𝘵𝘪𝘭𝘭 𝘸𝘩𝘦𝘯 𝘐 𝘭𝘰𝘰𝘬𝘦𝘥 𝘪𝘯𝘵𝘰 𝘺𝘰𝘶𝘳 𝘦𝘺𝘦𝘴, 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘢𝘵 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘷𝘦𝘳𝘺 𝘮𝘰𝘮𝘦𝘯𝘵, 𝘐 𝘬𝘯𝘦𝘸 𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘳𝘦 𝘸𝘰𝘶𝘭𝘥 𝘯𝘦𝘷𝘦𝘳 𝘣𝘦 𝘢𝘯𝘰𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘳 𝘭𝘪𝘬𝘦 𝘺𝘰𝘶. ||  2/14/17

He remembered that picture perfectly. It was a few months into your relationship and you had flown in to surprise him for Valentine's day. He hadn't expected you to come in, so he had absolutely nothing planned. The best part is that Claude and Ryanne had you two tag along on their Valentines day plans– which included a dinner and a stroll through some of Philly's landmarks. You were most excited to see the Rocky statue and Nolan could still remember the way his heart skipped a few beats when he saw you running up the steps, laughing on your way. You had asked Ryanne to take a picture of the two of you, handing over your polaroid camera he had gotten you for Christmas. And when she laughed and told you to pose, Nolan remembered looking down at you and smiling at just how goofy you looked– like a kid in a candy store.

The memory came to an end as he held the picture in his other hand with the envelope and unfolded a piece of paper that looked like it was from a journal. It had deep creases as if it had been unfolded and refolded multiple times as well. He flipped it over to the other side and saw your handwriting and on the top right corner, a date. But it wasn't just any date...it was the day after she broke up with him.

11/18/2018

N,

I don't know if I'll ever get the guts to actually give this to you, but you asked me for the reason why I ended things and this is the way you're going to get it. It seems selfish, I know. You deserved so much more than what I've already told you and I hope one day I'll be able to truly tell you why I did what I did. We spent two amazing years together and there's nothing in this world that I would trade them for and I never thought that we would end up where we are today...never in a million years. But things happen and things change and we can't fast-forward time to know if it's all really worth it, so we just trust our hearts and hope it turns out right. And I never really minded putting all that trust into my heart because with you, I didn't have to think twice or question myself- I kind of already knew what I wanted. 

I'm rambling now, I know, but I swear I'm getting to the point. Things got so hard once you left Nolan and none of it was your fault, so don't you dare ever think it was. I just missed your a lot more than I thought I would- and it's really hard when you miss people. But you know what they say; if you miss someone that means you're lucky. It means you had someone special in your life, someone worth missing. The Skype calls and text messages and snapchats only partially filled the void, so when I flew out to visit you... I thought that everything would be okay, that everything would be perfect and wonderful again. But that last night with you, God I swear it made it worse. And I still remember that night. The night when everything fell together so perfectly and I wished it would last forever because I felt like everything was normal again...but it didn't. 

So when I flew back home, it dawned on me N, it dawned on me that maybe this is supposed to be the end of us, maybe we're not meant to be together anymore. Maybe we were here to teach one another a lesson and once the lesson was taught, we were supposed to leave. Maybe you being on this amazing journey is teaching us a great lesson in life, one that we both needed to learn; that sometimes growing up means letting go of the dreams you aren't able to achieve...like those dreams of growing old together, the ones we talked about when we'd lay down on a blanket in your backyard and look at the stars.

 You've got so many dreams and achievements ahead of you N and I want you to go out there and achieve them and be free while you do. I want nothing more than to see you succeed because that's what loving someone is all about. Putting them before yourself so they can flourish. So me breaking up with you has nothing to do about not loving you. It's not that we didn't love each other, it's just that love wasn't enough. So I think I have to let go...we have to let go. I really believe you were the greatest thing that ever happened to me N. And no matter where we go in life, you will forever be the person I'll never stop looking for in a crowded place.

Always and Forever, Y/N

He bit the inside of his cheek and sighed, looking up from the crinkled paper and wiping his face on his t-shirt sleeve. He took a deep breath and looked back down at the paper, folding it back up and putting the picture back into the envelope as well and walked back into his house, closing and locking the door behind him. "Hey Nolan, who was at the door?" Travis asked, his voice making Nolan jump.

       "Oh uh, no one. Just the paper." He said as he opened the fridge. "Can you toss me a soda please?"

       He tossed him a soda and grabbed himself one, then closing the door and meeting him in the living room. "Paper huh? Where is it?" He asked, looking down at the envelope in his hands.

       "Oh, it's uh-" Nolan scratched the back of his neck, trying to come up with a lie.

       He laughed and plopped his hand onto his shoulder. "It's 12:30 dude, your parents already got the paper. But I'm sure whatever it is, must have been worth the read."

       "Yeah...it was," Nolan said, looking down at the envelope in his hands.        "What do you say? Let's watch me kick Nico's ass in NHL '18 for the hundredth time huh?" He smiled, walking ahead of him and down the stairs, back into the man- cave.

       Nolan nodded and followed him, stopping just outside the door and opening the envelope again and pulling out the small polaroid. He ran his thumb over your handwriting on the front and smiled.

Though it still hurts, he finally got his reason...and that's better than nothing.