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#idk im very happy with my life rn but it always makes me feel like im struggling to catch up with them and it's exhausting
lesbianfrottage · 2 months
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Okay but I need to be someone's beloved wifepet and belong to them completely and be able to pour my whole energy into just loving them. When will it be my turn!
#it won't be honestly#I do not think I will ever actually get to have that#I'm not pretty and I'm disabled in ways that both physically and mentally make me unappealing#so no one really wants anything real with me#especially JUST with me#and I'm *scared* of hurting someone with my craziness tbh#and I only trust like. 3 people at all rn and for various reasons none of those people and I are going to date#and in most of those cases I'm very relieved and in the other there's mixed feelings but mostly positive bc again. i don't want to hurt any1#but i still yearn for it#it's still an emotional need#and I hate that it just isn't ever going to be met#it actually hurts so so badly knowing it won't be met#but i also understand that some people just dont get that kind of happiness#some of us just don't get to be loved#some of us are too ugly and crippled and insane for people to *want* us#i just don't really... want to keep going knowing thay#I'll post it here in the tags bc no one i know reads this blog#(a few know about it but it's not like anyone ever checks it)#but I'm definitely ideating and at risk rn#and i feel pathetic that this is what's doing it#but im an emotionally gooey person and a physical touch person and I'd already been thinking relationships probably werent something i can#like. even do#but then there was a blowup with my ex and like. it was made clear that i can not safely engage with anyone#like emotionally or romantically or sexually#because I'll just hurt them.#like there are parts of me i would like to change but are such a core part of me that they will never change#and they will always hurt someone if we're together ling enough#so im just going to idk.#isolate now tbh#im just gonna cry so much and know i will NEVER have what i emotionally need out of life
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nothing makes me feel quite as behind and childish and juvenile as meeting from time to time with my college friends and it's. so embarrassing
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meateater-rabbit · 5 months
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chrisevansonly · 1 year
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𝐦𝐨𝐦 & 𝐝𝐚𝐝 𝐩𝐭2 | 𝐝𝐚𝐧𝐢𝐞𝐥 𝐫𝐢𝐜𝐜𝐢𝐚𝐫𝐝𝐨
✯social media au
✯daniel ricciardo x female reader
✯the nickname mom and dad finally has some ‘true’ meaning behind it 🫶🏻
✯ah this was a request so thank you so much!! this was very fun and cute to write, i hope you enjoy<3
part 1 part 3
ynricciardo
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mom and dad really are about to become mom and dad, baby ricciardo coming soon🤍
tagged danielricciardo
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username IM SOBBING
username im so happy for my parents 😭
username someone check on lando
lilyhme congratulations you two!! can’t wait to meet them!❤️
landonorris i need 4-5 business days to recover😭
>ynricciardo me too, wanna come watch cheesy movies with me🥹
>landonorris on my way 🏃🏻
username lando and y/n kill me😭
danielricciardo i love you, so excited to have a little terror around!!!!
>ynricciardo if they are a terror, that’s from you babe😚
ynricciardo added to their story!
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danielricciardo
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that is one hot mama, and she’s all mine😁😁
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username HOT MAMA😮‍💨😮‍💨
username oh she looks so beautiful!!!
username look at that bump!
redbullracing baby danny incoming!!!
>ynricciardo ❤️❤️
landonorris what size is baby ricc this week mom?
>ynricciardo they are about the size of an acorn squash apparently😂
>username lando calling y/n mom😭
ynricciardo
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this is life recently, all baby wants is gelato right now, which i won’t complain about. daniel and lando are like my full grown children half the time, and baby is the size of a cabbage now…which i feel the weight of 24/7🥴
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username cabbage ricciardo!!
liked by ynricciardo
username ou gelato sounds so good rn
username lando and danny being actual kids in adult bodies 💀
landonorris i was your first child remember that😌
>danielricciardo yeah idk why we agreed on that
>ynricciardo are you saying i was stupid to agree that lando was our first child? 🤨
>danielricciardo NO never, you’re the smartest baby, i love you!!
username HAHAHAHA smart response daniel
username im dying right now
danielricciardo added to their story!
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ynricciardo
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how the night started vs how the morning ended up, a very surprise welcome to our little girl Mila Grace Ricciardo. You are so special to us, mommy and daddy love you so much already❤️❤️
tagged daniel ricciardo
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username oh i’m sobbing rn
username Mila🥹🥹🥹
username I LOVE HER NAME SM
redbullracing welcome to the world little Mila!❤️
liked by ynricciardo and danielricciardo
landonorris im still crying
landonorris i can’t wait to meet her
>ynricciardo we’ll be home tomorrow so come over whenever ❤️
username lando crying is so me
danielricciardo my girls forever❤️
landonorris
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i’m not crying anymore don’t worry, just couldn’t help but introduce Mila as my god daughter. i can’t thank y/n enough, okay i guess daniel too, for trusting me with this title. i love Mila so much already
ps. i’m moving in😁
tagged ynricciardo, daniel ricciardo
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username omg lando and mila😭
username why is this making me sob so hard rn
username lando is the best uncle and now godfather ever🥹
ynricciardo you’re family lando, Mila loves you so much already, you always have a home with us🤍
>username ‘you always have a home with us’ i’m unstable
>danielricciardo she means the garage
>ynricciardo 🤨🤨🤨
username HAHAHAHA this is sending me
mclaren welcome baby mila 🧡🧡
liked by ynricciardo and landonorris
username lando getting all the mila angles 😭
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willbyersenthusiast · 5 months
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since i won’t shut up about Found Heaven, here’s a list of songs i think are very byler coded:
Found Heaven (the title track)
Alley Rose
The Final Fight
Miss You
Forever With Me
Eye Of The Night (kind of)
Winner (kind of)
and yk what while i’m here im gonna explain the reasons i think so;
Found Heaven:
i already explained this in a previous post (idk how to link them so have fun scrolling) but i will give a brief explanation; the song is about internalized homophobia and it’s basically conan telling his younger self it’s okay, or at least that’s how i perceive it, so i see this as a mike wheeler song. it can be will too but will is more out of the closet than mike tbf.
Alley Rose:
this one is kind of more about yearning and wanting but not before the relationship, it’s after it. they’re also kind of nervous around each other (especially mike) in season 4. the line “i waited all year at your feet like maybe you’d love me” is so them because they both waited for the other to reach out when Will moved to Lenora.
for the bridge, will is so worried about his best friend hating him because he’s gay and in love with him. “i thought if you’d ever leave me that i’d be the reason why.” and will again for the last little bit of the bridge saying “i swore hands were made for fighting, i swore eyes were made to cry, but you’re the first person that i’ve seen whose proven that might be a lie.” it’s kind of self explanatory in a way because will grew up in an abusive household. and for “don’t leave me hanging alone again.” i feel it fits both of them but also mike, because mike told will he felt like he was losing him and he wanted to be best friends again in s4
The Final Fight:
i feel like this one says how will wants to tell mike how much mike hurt him, and how he really upset him. he probably wants himself to get over mike and thinks this will help him (but it’ll just make mike confess😏 [hopefully].
Miss You:
this one makes me think of Mike telling Will how he misses him and how he felt like he “lost you or something.” and how “it’s not hawkins without you.” in season 4. and he knows he’s been a douche a little asshat (you can tell i’m a little upset with this mike lmao) but he wants “to be friends again. Best friends”
Forever With Me:
holy fucking shit this one. this song. i see this as Will yearning for Mike and wanting to be with him forever. “I ain’t sorry, though i should probably be. I think i’m gonna love you. You’re forever with me.” THIS SCREAMS WILL BYERS. “you are the reason i learned to love. Also the reason i cry” holy fucking SHIIIITTTT
Eye Of The Night:
i perceive this song as “this person haunts me. i see them everywhere and i can’t escape them” so it kind of reminds me of how they like always come back to each other? idk this one just kinda makes me think of them 💀
Winner:
this song (mainly just the pre-chorus and the chorus) makes me think of the rain fight. Will’s pov to be specific. i see it as Will saying “yeah you won you made me feel like shit, are you happy??” ykwim? OH AND THE SECOND VERSE “yet you have the nerve to miss me. how do i somehow feel guilty when you’re the one who let it get this bad” HOLY SHIT THATS LITERALLY THEIR FIGHT AT RINK-O-MANIA. like mike blaming will for not reaching out in the heat of the moment and therefore will blames himself too.
anyways that’s my little rant done GO STREAM FOUND HEAVEN ITS AMAZING AND IT HAS SUCH A DAZZLING 80S VIBE ITS MY FAVORITE THING RN GO LISTEN TO IT PLEASE ITS LIFE CHANGING
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ottiliere · 11 months
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hello! ur posts on the vagus nerve and its connections to digestions have encouraged me to do a lil mini dissertation thingy kinda focused on it/around it, ur big thread on PVT and everything really piqued my interest when i read it and i just held onto it for like a year or smthing until like last week when i started the project. Ik u said recently in one of ur posts i believe that ur not going to post the big dirk PVT post and im not here to be like yo post it because i also think u said that ur kinda moving away from like hs/dirky stuff rn ?? (im forgetting if i saw that sorry) but yeah i just wanted to say thank u etc etc, like ive never done an ask before so sorry if this is phrased weirdly but ur blog is just like one of those blogs that fundamentally changed how i view certain things in life for the better lol, like whether its ur beautiful representations / depictions of mental health in like just beautifully painted art (seriously the way u make it look like idk how to word it cartoony/really 2d but then it stands out against the background + if u zoom in and see the tiny pixel details == it makes me mad) or just like the huggeee long form posts that i like to chew on and save cuz theres so many details that AFFAAT like the way you talk abt the topics u portray has made me concious of how i would want to do so in the same way ig u get me. anyway this got really long and idk if i come across coherently, but ur just a random person on the internet whos art and written thoughts that u decide to share makes me happy when i see it == makes me pace around my room and distract me from this fat essay lmao so tldr: i really appreciate what u do + i hope like that ur doing well and that u keep arting and thoughting no matter what it is that u choose to focus on
(uve made me comitted to reading jthm, playing psychonauts and giving jjba w/ dio another go lmao) 🫶🫶
Hello! I’m sorry this reply is coming so late, this ask in particular is very sweet and has stuck out to me.
I’m really happy to have introduced you to PVT, this is something I’ve heard from a few different people on here and it’s very sweet… I did my thesis on it in college and the time really flew by while working on it, things you don't think could possibly attributed to "nerve issues" being nerve issues is always an eye-opener, isn't it? being able to research things that interest you & access information in general really is a privilege in this day and age.
“The topics [I] portray” are very important to me, so it’s heartening when others take interest in spite of the obvious deterrents. A lot of what I love making art about is unpalatable to most, and while I do understand the reasons for that on principle, it can make things feel a little insular. I genuinely believe there’s a lot of value in depicting tableaus of misery.
The last year has brought a lot of very unforeseen changes, and my life is quite different from when I initially made this blog to post about him! That’s also part of why I’ve been so sparse here…though I’m working to change that quite soon. I love sharing my work, and I’ve had the privilege of meeting some truly wonderful people through this website. That said…with where I’m at now, I’m not sure I’ll be posting the Dirk essay anytime soon, I’m afraid.
I’ve undertaken a few ongoing projects, one of which in particular is an original project I plan on sharing publicly here hopefully within the next month or so. I hope it’s something you & anyone else who’s stuck around with me here will enjoy, but failing that, I’ve really enjoyed working on it thus far.
Thank you for the sweet ask, take care, and good luck with your project!
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matd0 · 2 years
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life update ig ??:
hi hi hi hi hi hi hi !!!
ok so
1. i mentioned about having medical issues and some people got concerned so i just want to quickly explain the thing yk; in short it turns out having anxiety can cause heart arrhythmia ????? which can be like kinda dangerous;; but like in most cases it's fairly harmless so i should be alright :] !! still have to go check it out at the hospital (which i have been sorta putting off for a while bc yk. anxiety,, lol) but like other than it stressing me out a bit, everything is relatively fine :]
2. school is kicking my ass rn 💀 have a lot of unfinished work and missed a ton of classes bc my mental health kinda sucks,, so yk it's not exactly going great lol. but uhhhhhhhhhh im sure I'll figure it out ? ig ?? ye.
3. got a small art block. well it's more like "i have so much work to do, how dare i draw at a time like this" (and then just go to sleep bc im soo stressed and overwhelmed about everything 💀) but like. I'll probably get over it soon 🤷
idk i also just feel super obligated to always post super high effort paintings if i have many followers yk? like alot of the time i just feel like my drawings aren't good enough and everyone will like despise me for it;; and idk ig i just need constant approval for everything i do for some reason sjdhjshd. ik it's like. a really inaccurate and terrible way to look at it but i just can't rlly help it;;
uhhh all that to say, i hope it's alright if i post more sketches and unfinished drawings ? ;;
4. i would like to formally apologize for barely responding to literally anything. like. im so sorry dudes;;;;;;; unfortunately i have. very intense social anxiety and literally do not respond to anyone ever. (/srs it's like. a genuine issue in my life. whoops) but like i feel super bad about it bc i don't want to seem like i don't care T_T cuz lik e. i literally read every comment, message, tag, etc. and they always make me so so so happy ;;;;; like i routinely show screencaps of random comment to my friends gush about how nice they are 💀 idk point being; im a loser, i love all of you and it blows my mind that anyone cares about my silly drawings for a p much dead fandom lol.
extra: also i uh made a creepypasta oc 🧍‍♂️might post about him maybe idk im scared it'll be cringe sjhsjsgdhgdhd epic
TLDR; pretty stressed, small art block, school suckz, might die but probably not lol.
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(sorry this came off super negative and sort of venty 💀 its all good i swear, im just silly)
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akaakeis · 26 days
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literally going to kms i wrote a huge ask and it got deleted BUT IRS VERY IMPORTANT SO IM WRITINF IT AGAIN so first of all i want u to know that i am shameless and will double and triple and quadruple text u bcuz i love u
onto the main course!! i read this one fic and a reblog said something like "this is peaceful, peaceful is good" and it reminded me of u. like,, your writing is like that AND IN A GOOD WAY LEMME REPHRASE. so like! most fics have like,, something in them. explosions fireworks love hatred confessions misunderstandings u get what i mean
but urs are like. so not explosions,, so peaceful in comparison. like, reconnecting with old friends. sorry, we haven't talked in a bit. dancing in the rain. coming home. and they are like completely normal things that normal people experience and that i have experienced but for some reason you make them so special and magical ! somehow the peacefulness of it all makes it sm better. NOT SAYING THAT IF U WRITE EXPLOSIONS ILL FEEL ANY DIFFERENT AB UR WRITING IN GENERAL. but i mean your writing is familiar and warm and it's just... nothing special happens,, there's nothing life-changing going on,, and it's still so perfect and extraordinary.
um ill use my most favourite fic of all time here as an example ! The Iwa One. its less than 1k words and its just,,,,, a friend u havent seen in a long while, and u finally talk and u talk ab ur day and thats literally just it. AND SOMEHOW ITS LIKE SO
SO
IDK GOOD?????? like idk man im fr tweaking rn but. like. your writing's about little things,,, nothing huge in the long run, just a talk with an old friend. AND YOU STILL MANAGE TO MAKE IT SO SIGNIFICANT AND SO FULL OF LOVE AND JOY AND WARMTH likr bro!!!!! ive always liked that one quote that goes,, love is in the little things but i think ur writing has given me a new perspective of it and now i love it (ur writing, the quote) even more now!!!!
erm that's all ily mwah mwah
NOOO THE LONG ASK 😞😞 sorry bb that sucks i hate when that happens but IM SO HONORED that you're literally rewriting all of that for ME?? i may cry thanks i love u
alina im literally staring at this ask like :( WHAT IF I GENUINELY CRY OVER THIS OH MY GOD!! like im so happy that it gives off that vibe because that's truly what i try to go for! im not trying to do anything particularly special? i just want to be able to give comfort through my fics <3
i genuinely want to keep this in my inbox forever and ever so that i can reread it but you at least deserve a reply from me for sending the sweetest thing ever :( like lately ive been kinda iffy abt how i feel regarding my writing but this really does make me feel better!! because knowing that someone like you (who i deem as an important voice on my writing) really likes my writing, it just makes me want to continue for you <3 im so glad i can provide u with writing to enjoy and i hope i can continue to in the long run <3 xx
thank u for this alina ily!!
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magical-glimpse · 1 year
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your readings are so great tbh it’s nice to see people having such a connection with the universe! Do u think you could do an energy check on the members?
Thank you !! You're so nice !! I still have a lot to learn tbh, but im glad you love my readings !
As always,
For entertainment purposes only.
Jin:At the same time, he sees the military as a break from his idol life, but he also want a break from the military lol.A lot of it has got to do with him having to fight his nature.He's naturally a lot more laid back and fun than the circumstances mostly let him be.I think one of his past investments is growing while he isnt there, and the fruits are getting ready for whe he will come back.He is also torn between two options for a choice ( idk what tho).He is feeling out of touch with his purpose while understanding why this had to happen.It is helping him develop another side of himself, and he is learning to balance them.
NJ:He didnt want any cards, but hes saying he is thinking about things deeply.He seemed like i caught him off guard when he was in the middle of a reflection ?You know when people are trying to explain something to you but they are getting caught up in the cobwebs of their thoughts?Yeah, him rn.
Yoongi:OK so Yoongi teased me and dared me to do it with no cards.He said he is feeling quite peaceful and content/satisfied rn.It's the phase where the stage euphoria came down but youre not quite into post show blues yet.Just quiet, happy, calm, tranquil.Moving slowly, relaxed.I saw him going down a slow river sitting on a surfboard with his eyes closed.So yeah, nice.
Hobi:He seemed pretty excited to do the reading but the first card that came out was the Tower ??I think he is going through a very transformative phase but he is also really excited for it. A sense of oh finally.A lot of his fears and deep anxieties are coming down, he is cutting through them with a new sense of rationality and outspokenness(?) He is becoming less afraid of telling his truth and is not letting himself being held back and literally tied down by how other people see him.He is very strssed tho, and is using good old breathing techniques to relax. (Which kinda makes sense bc i feel like since the military his energy has been mostly quiet except for random burst of really wanting to talk, so i guess it is linked to his stress levels ?)
Jimin:I think he might have asked someone out recently and it went very well ?WHAT- PARK JIMIN GO BACK WITH YOUR 18+ STUFF NO-hm hm, so boy is having fun.In general, he is spending time on things and people he love, going out, learning new things, connecting or reconnecting with people, following where his passion and emotions lead him.He is also really enjoying having attention rn.
Tae:A part of him want to keep very private, but hes seeing around.As in learning things, discovering art he didnt know, a little imaginative.He has been hurt by public attention too much and wants to withdraw a little.He doesnt want ARMY to worry though, he just want us to understand he is human, and that would be hard on anyone. JK:Jk felt pumped up and talkative lol.So he learning to let things go and to find his joy in the things he has right now, he is learning to be happy.It is the end of a trial for him.He had many options and he thinks he picked right.It is the end of the phase.The next one might be the one where he meets his twin flame (if you have followed me for a while, you would know he insists on talking about them almost everytime lol).Their psychic link will strengthen like never before.He is in general quite happy with where he got in life and proud of himself for recent lessons he learned and went through
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seattlesellie · 1 year
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this is super random (also this is my first msg to u hi <3) and i’m honestly asking this generally to anyone else who also happens to read this, but recently i’ve realized my sexual orientation and come to the conclusion that i’m like REALLY attracted to women (as a woman myself ofc). so obv this made me also think abt how someday i’m gonna have to tell ppl close to me abt this but i’m literally losing my mind cause i’m NAWT vulnerable especially w/ my parents 😭 and also i just now was watching a tiktok live that was full of homophobic ppl and whenever i see that on the internet, it makes me wanna go deeper in the shell (or closet lmao) that i already am in. like it makes me realize how many horrible ppl there are that won’t accept smth so simple (i’m also very emotional as u can see 😍) so like tbh i’m not sure what i’m seeking here but ig i’m just curious if u or anyone else has felt like this/what helped u come out? like it’s so hard for me to be open and as someone who recently graduated and is going to uni, in a completely diff country alone, i’m gonna have more freedom and if i were to date another girl, it’d feel unfair to my parents if i didnt say anything prior abt my identity. ik they’re also very supportive, which i’m thankful for, but i just HATEEE vulnerability. idk man :( it’s also very weird finally realizing more abt myself. it makes me SO happy yet so so so scared? aarrghh idk sorry abt this long message, u seem like the nicest person and this place feels safe, so i just felt like i could ask/find some kind of relatability. 💗 sorry again for this long ass rant LOLS 🌟
okokok im gonna tell u my coming out story because i can awfully relate to this ?? n adding a read more cos this is so long sorry <333 🤧
literally knew i liked girls my entire life and like suppressed the shit out of it. would try and date guys all throughout highschool and would feel so terrible afterwards… but like you, i was super uncomfortable with that type of vulnerability and also barely had any gay friends, let alone any gay female friends. so i spent my life just thinking im gonna be in the closet forever !! until i met my now ex gf, she would constantly be sleeping over— but i did the classic thing of telling my parents she was just my new best friend, until one day my dad was like… be so fr rn are you two dating. like you said, my parents are also very liberal and supportive (especially my dad), but still— it made me panic and drop a mug and deny deny deny !! then, after being together for like 6 months it was incredibly hard to hide it, and obvs she felt super uncomfortable bc i was super closeted and she was super out. so i kind of had to come out to my parents (i hid under a blanket and told them i have an important thing to say n then they already somehow knew). my parents and i literally never talked about these things like my mom didn’t even know about my first kiss or literally NOTHING about me, we didn’t have that type or relationship at all so i can relate to u so hard !!but like here’s the thing— i don’t think it would be unfair to your parents, this is your story to tell and you should do it when you feel comfortable enough, and if it takes you dating a girl for that then so be it. you shouldn’t worry about other peoples feelings about this, as this is yours to tell and not theirs! as long as you’re in a safe environment, coming out can truly be such a big fucking relief !! like that absolute weight that drops out of your chest is so so freeing. if the people who are close to you love you— they will accept you. if they won’t? truthfully, they don’t deserve u and never have. about the homophobia, its always going to be here, unfortunately for us hateful and bigoted people will always exist, and that can be extremely stressful and painful, which is why surrounding yourself with people from your own community is so so important and necessary. uni is such a good place to do that !! so many new people to meet and especially queer people to surround yourself with !! i super understand your fears but the good things that happen after you come out— that feeling of no longer needing to hide yourself is so so worth it 💗💗💗💗
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captain-hawks · 14 days
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I'm out picking fig leaves amd red dates rn but I got a post notifications with you being hard on your writing and I just want to come on here real quick to give you a big ole hug. Your writing is BEAUTIFUL and compelling and I love the way you pull so many scenarios out of seemingly thin air. I love all the directions your mind goes and the way you bring to life all the scenarios you weave. And I truly mean to use the word "weave" bc even your short drabbles are rich in world building. They don't feel like little disconnected stories so much as they feel like part of a world that I, as a reader, am somehow already hazily familiar with despite just being dropped into the story. It feels like I've been watching this friendship/love/general relationship grow for a while and someone turned up the volume for this little snippet and it's coming through clearly. It feels like a beautiful quilt of unique crocheted squares that all come together to form something enriching and gorgeous and leaves me simultaneously sated and yearning for more!!! Idk how you do it!! Ilysm and you're the whole reason im even active on tumblr basically. I've been a lurker for at least a decade and a half but reading your work gave me the final push to get over my internet shyness to let people know when i enjoy The Thing They Made. I'm so sorry if none of this made sense btw I am being eaten ALIVE by mosquitoes but goddammit I want to make fig leaf creme brulee and creme anglaise and maybe mesquite honey fig leaf ice cream. I've been putting off making yeasted donuts but it might be time to try so I can make fig leaf custard and shove that in there too 🌿
also I keep getting hit in the head by raining dates. ouch.
i’ve had to re-read this message multiple times today because i just keep getting so overcome with a giant tidal wave of emotions every time i start. 
i don’t even know where to begin to start expressing how thankful i am for all of your endlessly thoughtful and incredibly meaningful observations (that you always put SO much time and effort into sharing with me!!!). no amount of verbal gratitude feels like it will fully suffice to encompass just how impactful your feedback has been and continues to be. the fact that those are your takeaways from my work is genuinely one of the biggest, most lovely compliments i could ever receive as a writer. i’m not exaggerating in the slightest when i say that all of the kind things you’ve said have a forever home in my brain and heart. 
i appreciate you so so so so so very much, friend<3 and i’m so happy you’re doing your thing on here now and interacting because you are literally a whole entire ray of light.
anyway I HOPE YOUR FIG AND DATE ADVENTURES END UP FRUITFUL!!!! i am once again weeping at the promise of what sounds like another incredibly tasty creation of yours 😭
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rainbowrenjun · 1 year
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15 questions, 15 mutuals
tagged by @boochans (ty!!!<3 even tho it took me like a week lol)
1. are you named after anyone? nope! unless you count the fact that my mom loves british tv so she gave me and brother very british names unintentionally lol 2. when was the last time you cried? yesterday i teared up but i can't for the life of me remember why. if we’re talking a proper cry tho i don’t remember but it couldn’t have been long ago bc i’m a big cry baby like crying doesn’t register as a big deal to me atp like that’s just my life baby 3. do you have kids? noooo omg i’m still trying to figure out how to take care of myself😭 4. do you use sarcasm a lot? idk what counts as a lot but i have been known to be sarcastic 5. what sports do you play/have you played? never been a huge sports person but as a kid i did soccer, golf, and a bit of karate 6. what’s the first thing you notice about people? i’m not sure maybe their outfit? or maybe hair color/style bc that's the easiest way to tell people apart imo 7. what’s your eye colour? light blue 8. scary movies or happy endings? not a big movie person but i’m always down for a good comedy so i guess happy endings 9. any special talents? not that i'm aware lol (unless having such bad adhd that adderall makes me sleepy is a special talent🤔) 10. where were you born? this feels like a security question so i’m gonna keep it vague and say the west (of us america) but i only lived in that town as a baby im not a true West Coaster™️ 11. what are your hobbies? giffing, trading/collecting kpop stuff, video games (esp rpgs!! give me recs if ur into rpgs 👀), writing (fanfic but also original stuff that i can never seem to finish), used to be really into makeup but i fell out of it during the pandemic, reading (i tend to not read for 6 months and then read 300k words in one sitting. all or nothing🫡 also if u read danmei or wlw stuff give me recs:3) 12. do you have pets? yes i have a 6 year old cat (thalia) & a 2 year old dog (mochi)! 13. how tall are you? roughly 5’5 14. favourite subject in school? social studies! 15. dream job? author has always been my childhood dream that's carried into adulthood if i can ever finish a damn novel, but rn i'm trying to attempt college (again) to go into a history related field!
tagging (if u want to ofc :3): @minchanz @mistarover @taeminnomuyeppeo @twiceland @jsuh
+ bonus visuals references of thalia & mochi 🥰
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romatique · 1 year
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hi lina! i sent jes a message ab a day ago and it's all ab astrology. if u have time and it doesn't bother u, i hope u could give ur two cents ab it ^^
my bestfriend for 14 years, know nothing about ATEEZ [ i just found out that she won an ATZ album to a "BTS ALBUM GIVEAWAY" so she's not completely unaware of them ] recently gave me her birth time and out of curiosity, I put it up with my bias' (hwa) chart and in my interpretation, if these two meet— idk... IM A FAN
8h mars overlay
1h mars overlay
7h vertex
11h moon overlay
6h moon overlay
virgo-juno conjunction
juno-juno conjunction
asc-sun conjunction
moon-sun conjunction
mars-moon conjunction
mars trine moon
mercury trine venus (both ways)
mars trine venus
*attached below is a pic of their composite chart*
these r the placements that i feel are very strong and important to relationships. but idk, i could just be reaching and maybe im just a delusional bestfriend and fan but im not even kidding when i say she *almost* always match the seonghwa ideal type and fs readings VERY WELL that it almost always creep me out and even question my sanity bc it was just so random (somehow).
so yeah, that's basically it. im actually not so very much deep into astrology YET. i already asked her ab her thoughts on this, and she just said "everything will workout if it's meant to be" then followed it up with "or baka masyado ka lang oa sa interpretation, baka kapag nagkita kame niyan pumikit pa siya heheh POGI-POGI NIYAN" implying that she doesn't think it's impossible for them to cross paths but also doesn't believe that there would be something, that he's too good- looking, and that I AM JUST REACHING LMAO
I HOPE I DIDNT BORE U BC OF THAT LONG ASS MESSAGE LMAO. this is me asking for ur 2 cents btw lol i just want to know if i am interpreting things properly or... im just reaching.
THANK U IN ADVANCE, LINA!
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hello sweetheart! you didn’t bore me at all~ i absolutely adore jes and i’m happy she sent you to me.
i know a lot of people have that “delusional” concept in their heads. i’m ngl, i’m lowkey like that too, i try to stand on a realistic ground, especially for readings. but i do believe that, in some way, celebrities could end up with potential fans aswell.
someone (i don’t quite remember who rn, i’ll make sure to check after i post this) posted once that bangchan’s fs is also a fan, for example. that happens more often than we could ever imagine. some celebrities even prefer it that way (let’s say they like the attention, not in a negative way, they just like being cared for)
in astrology, not everything’s perfect, of course. so even if their charts don’t match perfectly, that’s still a good sign. if you never bleed, you never grow and etc. it’s important to have a few negative sides to every relationship, as long as it’s not abusive! cause if not, how will we know what works and what doesn’t?
so, i read your whole message and the chart you sent as well. and i LOVE the earth energy right here. stable, grounded, and there’s also an open-minded side to the relationship with the gemini mars in the 10th house. could mean a foreigner, someone who’s into literature, or has an academic life, opposite to seonghwa’s which makes sense since he’s a cancer moon conjunct rising. he NEEDS that, haha.
i’d say: you’re completely fine on having your own opinions on it! she seems like she has her own life to handle so i believe that this won’t get in her way. as she said, if it’s meant to be, it’ll be.
don’t worry, you’re definitely not crazy haha. i was like this with my boyfriend before we started dating. but i just wanna let you know to not live like your life depends on it, just let it be~~ who knows? maybe someday their paths could cross, maybe not. let’s wait and see 🫶🏻
thanks for the ask again, love 🥹💞
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AINT NO WAY YOU JUST NAMED ME LEGEND ANON OH MY GOD?
anyways here goes the confusing gender story so idk I kind of always knew I was transmasc? but it was so hard for me to accept because as much as I like to present masculine and I like looking like a man and stuff I also like glittery eyeshadow and being feminine in a way it is difficult to explain I don’t know if this even makes sense but I had such a hard time feeling “valid” because I don’t want to completely ban femininity from my life but I am a man?(it feels weird writing this oh my god) anyways the way you write for mpind matty is so.. idk English isn’t my native language by the way so sorry if nothing I’m writing is making any sense rn but I read the stuff you write for him and I’m like “that’s how I feel” or “that’s how I act” and he’s obviously a man? even though there’s like aspects to his character that are feminine and delicate no one would question his gender yk so I’m kind of starting to realize that it’s okay and I can be a man and still wear glittery eyeshadow or idk wear lace panties because I think it’s hot xd (these examples are so bad please im sorry it’s late and I’ve had some wine and im also embarrassed but its anonymous so I think it’s fine? I’m freaking out hell o)
ok but apart from the gender thing the way you write mpind matty has me fhsdhsjsjsh let me tell you it was some of the hottest smut I’ve ever read but also some of the angstiest angst I’ve ever read your writing is beautiful thank you very much BIG ASS HUG while I hide in the corner
i'm paying my dues to the poofs of the world (don't cancel me for saying that i will cry.) i'm so happy MPIND somehow managed to help you find your gender identity i feel oddly honoured???
Also yes please you SMASH the glittery eyeshadow and panties because thats hot and youre hot so connect the dots xx
it makes me giddy that ppl enjoy the filthy MPIND smut i put out and if you have any specific request for him i'd be happy to write it just for you (can you tell i get weirdly attached to people also you can never leave)
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haikyuuhoo · 10 months
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kaitlyn!!! am just dropping by to deliver some cookies and milk (non-dairy, if you prefer!!) 🍪🥛 for the weekend !! and i am curious !! what is your love language (both/either giving/receiving) ?? and would you and your fave get along when it comes to it 🥺
sel my love, hello!!! thank you for stopping in, cookies and milk are so perfect rn 🫶🏼
my love languages! giving it’s definitely gift giving—it’s definitely my way of being like “hey btw I always think about you even when we’re not together.” I love a little ‘this made me think of you’ gift idk :)
for receiving I think it would be words of affirmation (or acts of service at specific times). even though I literally can’t take a compliment to save my life lol I literally always think about them.
and okay okay this one is fun—I’m gonna run through a few of my favs. For Osamu I think definitely we would. I feel like he gets flustered receiving little gifts that aren’t necessarily for any special occasion bc he’s like “??? you just want me to have this? bc you like me?” and I’m like yeah I’m literally in love w you you dork. and bc he's quieter i think the words of affirmation from him would just mean sm more. like he wouldn't say it unless he 100% meant it. but i do feel like acts of service is HIS love language—he shows his love through food and i am very happy to receive it lol.
i feel like nanami is very similar in that when he says something you know he means it. also an acts of service guy (the way he treats the first years?? hello?? amazing man im so in love w him). and i feel like he'd lowkey love getting little gifts or whatever, keeps them on his desk or dresser or smth and just loves admiring them. also is a flower giver because he's such a gentleman <3
gojo… sigh. i love him. but he'd be so teasingly annoying about it. i just know i'd have such a hard time getting him gifts for big occasions because like… dude's loaded. i'd be so self-conscious like "he could buy this for himself. what if he doesnt like this one bc it's not nice enough." but he'd love literally anything you got him ofc because he’s ALSO a sucker for ‘I got this cause I thought of you’ gifts. and his words of affirmation would, again, be in a very playful/teasing manner so like some days it's great but other days when I’m tired/upset it just strikes a nerve & lowkey makes things worse 😅 can be mature and serious and very very loving when he needs to be tho <3
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skadream · 5 months
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happy ummm 8th month on t? (9th if i were actually on t continuously but i ran out for a month that one time) i used to do monthly t updates on tiktok but i dont rlly feel like doing that rn so i'll yap about it here (its actually wild how little stuff i have about my transition on my tumblr generally speaking? as if this isnt the website that transed my gender in the first place)
it really is hard to notice such gradual changes from month to month, especially if its just me lookin at myself, compared to seeing a doctor in person which, i am getting rx'd T thru telehealth currently as my nearest planned parenthood or even a neighboring one does not actually do gender affirming care which is. insane and whack. esp when i do live in a pretty populated county maybe second or third to nyc and albany area. and i have to call in to a pp THREE HOURS BY TRANSIT from me. but like, its been working for now ok!
mentally and emotionally ive been very up and down overall but i think thats largely due to my medication changes rather than hormones. ALTHOUGH. when i ran out for a month in november and my period came back... dude it was so horrible like genuinely the worst period of my life. its one of those things where i didnt realize just how dysphoric something could make me feel until i had a taste of being able to alleviate said dysphoria. so mentally speaking testosterone is probably pulling the mental train even more than the wellbutrin lol. and im trying not to account too much for circumstance/environment cuz like OBVIOUSLY if things were going smoothly for me there a lot of my emotional issues would be at least somewhat relieved, but im working with what i got.
physically, since starting t in july i have lost weight. at first i was very scared it was my medication, and i think a part of it was at least a little, like two of my meds can cause some weight loss, but i am no longer losing weight in a concerning way but just yknow the regular amount of daily fluctuation. so i do think a lot of my weight loss was due to hormones just shifting around my fat and all that, or something idk lol. everyones so diff with hormones, i know some trans guys gain weight on t and not necessarily from muscle training, i know girls on e who have lost weight without any changes to diet or exercise, it really depends so as always, this is just my experience etc etc
i do have more facial hair but its still quite patchy, i think i might start filling in my stache tho. with my shitty goatee, its not my fav so i shave it off when im not just sitting inside all day, but also idk it makes my chin feel less. round. or smth. i do always think of my one friend telling me ill look like the lead singer of a nü metal band and honestly maybe i should start giving that energy more anyway! embrace goatee lifestyle!
oh yeah my voice dropped in like the first two months and has gotten deeper since, and on timtom i talked a lot about wanting to maintain the vocal range i had pre-t? i dont think thats fully possible like i think the highest notes i used to reach are just inaccessible to me, but i think if i did some like vocal singing warmups i can get back up to reach those higher notes. in retrospect the way ive sung my whole life has actually prob been destructive on my voice, partly from lack of proper training and partly intentionally trying to sound deeper and more gravelly, but now that i can access deeper sounds more naturally i really do wanna work on singing in a better way where i can reach some of those notes.
overall yea im liking whats happening so far, i do wish it was happening faster but i understand that some people dont get the progress ive gotten for like, YEARS, and new progressions will be happening to me for years after today. if you think about "real" puberty, it is a gradual shift its not like you suddenly grow a chest as soon as you Bleed or whatever its different for literally every person and since im the only one in my family that i know of who has done this, im kind of a guinea pig. but like im okay with that! anyway yeah really recommrnd testosterone if u want it i like it :)
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